Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/71515.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Panic_At_The_Disco, Bandom
  Relationship:
      Brendon_Urie/Spencer_Smith
  Stats:
      Published: 2010-03-17 Words: 4358
****** Just Stop and Take a Second ******
by sperrywink
Summary
     Brendon's first time isn't stellar. Still, orgasms are always fun.
     (The boys are 17).
Notes
     All errors and inadequacies are mine. Mucho thanks to
     [[info]]
turps33 for the speedy and fantastic beta.
Looking at his can of soda, Brendon said, "You know, I'm not sure this is as
racy without the alcohol."
Ryan punched him lightly in the shoulder. "Shut up. I Never is always fun. I
Never wrote a poem."
Everyone except Ryan groaned and he alone took a drink of his soda. Brendon
ducked his head and grinned. He might take the piss out of Ryan, but he was
having a great time.
He'd been tense since moving out of his parents house and setting up shop in
his own apartment, and it was only when hanging out with his bandmates that he
relaxed.
Playing I Never was a new addition, but they couldn't practice all the time, no
matter what Brendon and Ryan thought. Or at least that's what Spencer and Brent
kept telling them. Whatever. Like practicing for a couple hours a day was
really excessive.
They'd been playing for half an hour, going through silly shit first like I
never skipped gym and I never lied to my parents. It was fun learning
miscellaneous facts about the others. Brent had never gone skinny dipping, but
Spencer and Ryan had gone together. Spencer had never had a nightmare, while
Ryan had never had a pet.
Spencer licked his lips. Brendon tried not to stare too noticeably, but really,
when Spencer did things like that, he didn't know how he was supposed to avoid
it. He quickly looked back down at his soda as Spencer said, "I Never kissed a
girl."
Everyone drank and Brent said, "That's a lame I Never. You need to take it to
the next level. I Never had sex." Brendon felt his stomach drop out. Ryan and
Spencer hooted and threw popcorn at Brent. Brent ducked down to avoid the
popcorn, but then straightened up and took a defiant drink of his coke.
Spencer said, "You did not! With who? When?"
"Last summer. And wouldn't you like to know."
Ryan took a drink and shrugged. "Girlfriend."
Almost surreptitiously, but with a knowing nod from Ryan, Spencer also took a
sip. There had been that older girl Spencer had been dating this past winter,
and Brendon guessed it went further than Spencer had hinted at the time.
Brendon had hated her.
Everyone then turned their attention to Brendon and he flushed red. He looked
down at his soda and toyed with the can.
He didn't take a drink.
Brendon peeked up and caught Ryan and Spencer exchanging speaking glances. He
had no idea what they were expressing to each other, but they didn't seem
surprised. Before the silence extended into completely uncomfortable territory,
Ryan said, "I never kissed a boy."
Brent, apparently clueless, said, "Hey! It's not your turn!" Things descended
into chaos as Spencer threw more popcorn at Brent, and Ryan tumbled them both
to the floor.
Brendon was happy to have all eyes off him for the moment. He did catch Spencer
giving him a considering look, and he didn't know whether it was because he
hadn't had sex or because of the way his flush deepened at Ryan's new I Never.
He tried not to be too obvious around Spencer, but things had gotten out of
hand in the last couple of minutes. He might have let something slip. Besides
his virginity, that is.
Suddenly the game didn't seem as much fun.
 
===============================================================================
 
Brendon wasn't surprised when Spencer dropped by on his next day off; he was
just surprised it wasn't both Ryan and Spencer. They tended to confront things
together. It didn't stop him from chattering a mile a minute in what he knew
was a vain hope to distract Spencer.
Finally during one of the rare moments Brendon was taking a breath, Spencer
said, "So. You haven't had sex."
Brendon froze.
Spencer put his arm around Brendon. "Breathe, Brendon." Taking a shuddery,
gulping breath, Brendon looked away from Spencer. He crossed his arms and
gripped his elbows tight. He didn't want to be having this conversation, but he
knew Spencer wouldn't let it go. Spencer never let things go.
Spencer said, "Because, Ryan and I were talking about why that would be."
"Shut up, Spence." Brendon's voice was barely a whisper. He felt trapped by
Spencer's words as much as by his arm.
"Hey. We just want to make sure that it's a choice and not some bullshit
reason."
Brendon gave a harsh laugh. What was a non-bullshit reason for still being a
virgin when almost eighteen? Finally getting a grip on his emotions, he let his
temper flow free and shook off Spencer's arm. He glared defiantly at Spencer
and then started walking away.
Grabbing his arm, Spencer said, "Talk to me."
"What the hell do you want me to say? No, I haven't had sex. Yes, it sucks.
What do you want me to do about it?"
Brendon glared at Spencer, but it didn't make him back off. Spencer just rubbed
Brendon's arm as he bit his lip. Spencer said, "Is it because of the boy
thing?"
Brendon's heart lodged in his throat. He didn't know how to explain his
confused emotions and feelings to Spencer. He'd made a clean break from his
past and that included accepting all parts of himself, not just his musical
dreams, but that didn't mean he knew how to live as a gay man. It wasn't the
boy thing as Spencer so delicately put it, but it wasn't not the boy thing
either. He looked hopelessly at Spencer and shrugged.
Now Spencer looked nervous, but he kept his grip on Brendon's arm. He licked
his lip again and blushed. "Because Ryan and I were talking, and if it was the
boy thing, well, I'm a boy."
Brendon blinked. He waited for Spencer to say something else. Spencer, the
bastard, remained silent. He blinked again.
Finally, fury rose in his chest, dislodging his heart from his throat and
freeing his voice. "What the hell? You and Ryan talked, huh? You draw the short
straw?" He shook off Spencer's arm and stormed into the kitchen. It didn't have
a door to slam, but he didn't want to go into the bedroom given the current
conversation.
Spencer followed behind him, talking to his back. "No, I didn't draw the short
straw. Ryan knew I might be interested."
Brendon turned around. Still furious, in a low, serious voice, Brendon said,
"I'm not your pity fuck."
"Brendon. It's not like that. I just. I just fucking care, all right."
"Yeah, well, that's not the same as wanting to fuck me."
Spencer blushed scarlet. "There's some of that going on too."
Brendon blinked, speechless again.
Now Spencer wrapped his arms around himself, but his gaze on Brendon remained
steady. "I might be somewhat attracted to you."
"Might."
"Probably."
"Probably."
Spencer rolled his eyes. "Brendon."
"Sorry. I'm just trying to wrap my head around this." Brendon didn't know
whether he was more shocked that Spencer liked boys, or that Spencer liked him
in particular. His anger dissipated and he was left with confusion and a vague
hope. He searched Spencer's face, but only saw the same vague hope that he was
feeling reflected there. "You're serious?"
Spencer nodded and blushed again. He stepped closer to Brendon until they were
chest to chest. "Totally serious."
 
===============================================================================
 
Kissing Spencer was a trip. Spencer's lips were thin, but mobile, driving
Brendon wild with the way they slanted and moved against his. Spencer was a
good kisser, and Brendon didn't know why he was surprised by this, but he was.
Maybe it was more that he was expecting the awkwardness between them to
increase, but it hadn't happened that way. Once they started kissing,
everything seemed to slot into place.
They had decided to wait until Brendon had two days off in a row since it
corresponded with Spencer's spring break. Spencer convinced his parents to let
him spend the night at Brendon's, and Ryan ran interference with Brent for
them. Spencer came over early in the morning, and they played video games for
awhile, uneasy in each other's space. Finally, Brendon said, "Fuck it," and
leaned over and kissed the side of Spencer's mouth. It was rushed and their
mouths smushed together in the most unsexy way possible, but it broke the ice.
Spencer dropped his controller and wrapped his hand around the back of
Brendon's head, bringing their lips into alignment. Brendon's heart picked up
as the kiss deepened. Still, it was a tough angle, so when they broke apart,
they were laughing. Spencer said, "Let's move to the couch, yeah?"
Nodding, Brendon stood up and put out a hand to help Spencer to his feet. He
tugged, and Spencer came up, all the way into his arms. Spencer wrapped them
around Brendon and said, "Or we could do it this way." He kissed Brendon again
and Brendon felt his heart zoom. If kissing Spencer was this electric, he
didn't know how he would be able to get through the actual sex.
They stumbled to the couch, barely breaking the kiss to watch where they were
going. Brendon's foot got tangled in one of the controller wires, but it was
worth it when he fell onto the couch and Spencer fell with him. He kicked
randomly to get his leg free as Spencer sucked his neck.
Breaking off from kissing, Spencer leaned on his hands above Brendon. "So, we
never talked about what you wanted to do."
Brendon thought about dicks and asses and mouths, and his dick in particular in
combination with all of them. "Everything."
"Everything?" Spencer sounded disbelieving.
Suddenly concerned that this was all going to go wrong, Brendon asked, "Why,
what did you want to do?"
Spencer shook his head and made an exaggerated face. "No! No, everything is
great. I just. Just what did you want to do first?" He looked nervous again.
Brendon's whole body stiffened in consternation. "If you don't want to be here,
just tell me."
"It's not that. I do! Just maybe build up to it?"
"Build up to what, Spencer?" He knew he sounded exasperated, but really now.
"You in me." Spencer wouldn't look him in the eye. It was probably for the
best. Brendon's cock twitched at even hearing the words and any more
stimulation and he'd be coming in his pants. Just the mental images were enough
to get him raring to go.
Brendon coughed to clear his suddenly dry throat, and ran his hand down
Spencer's back, stopping at the waistband of his jeans. "Yeah. We can build up
to that."
Spencer kissed him again, his tongue sliding wetly into Brendon's mouth.
Brendon enjoyed the slick slide for long minutes, finally pulling away to catch
his breath. Spencer went back to sucking on his neck and Brendon arched into
the caress, letting his hands roam over Spencer's back. He said, "Since you
seem to have more restrictions than me, what do you want to do first?"
Spencer stilled and then mumbled something into Brendon's neck. Brendon said,
"What?"
"How about I blow you?"
"Fuck, yeah."
Spencer went back to sucking on Brendon's neck, but now it seemed purposeful.
While Spencer's mouth drew patterns on Brendon's neck, his hands were busy
pushing up Brendon's shirt and tugging at his sweatpants. Brendon let Spencer
strip him naked. He didn't even mind the elbow in his stomach or the way
Spencer got his sweatpants tangled in the controller wire and bound Brendon's
feet together for a couple minutes. He even kept his smirking to a minimum,
which he thought was very gentlemanly of him.
Bracing himself on the heels of his feet, Spencer stared down at Brendon for
long seconds. Brendon began squirming at the attention, but his cock just grew
marginally harder. Apparently it liked being admired. Reaching out and
tentatively running his fingertips along Brendon's length, Spencer seemed lost
in a trance.
Spreading his legs wider, Brendon hoped Spencer got the hint. Spencer's gaze
flicked up to meet Brendon's look, but then flicked back down to look at his
cock. His hand grew more confident and he finally wrapped it around Brendon's
length and stroked. Brendon groaned and rolled his head back. Spencer's pace,
or lack thereof, was going to kill him.
Finally, Spencer scooted backwards and ran kisses up the inside of Brendon's
thigh. Brendon's muscles tightened and his leg twitched. It was both too little
and too much in his hyper-excited state. Spencer's mouth smoothly transitioned
from his leg to his cock, and Brendon's whole body shook. He groaned again and
gripped the back of the couch tightly. Damn, Spencer's lips felt divine wrapped
around his cock.
Sucking cautiously, Spencer started bobbing his head slowly. Brendon closed his
eyes and focused on remaining still as the intense feelings washed over him. It
was over far too soon. Brendon could feel the electricity building in his gut
and spreading out to tingle in his fingertips as the heat from Spencer's mouth
engulfed him yet again. As he came in a rush, he gave a hastily shouted warning
for Spencer.
Brendon slowly blinked open his eyes, to find Spencer wiping his face clear of
come with Brendon's t-shirt. Brendon was too relaxed to care. He smiled at
Spencer, feeling how goofy it was, but not caring about that either. He tugged
Spencer to him and sloppily kissed him. Luckily, Spencer just laughed.
Brendon said, "Your turn." Spencer kissed him ardently back and moaned into the
kiss.
They both sat up and Brendon helped Spencer take off his clothes. Well, he
tried to help Spencer take off his clothes. He kept on getting distracted by
all the new skin that was revealed to him and that he just had to kiss right
that second. Spencer finally pushed Brendon away and undressed himself.
Once naked, he seemed nervous. Brendon smiled at him and pulled him close,
knowing how Spencer didn't like to be stared at, even clothed. He would have
liked the opportunity to study Spencer's body, but he figured he'd get the
chance later when Spencer was post-orgasm stupid. Right now it was worth it to
kiss him and be able to run his hands over all that naked skin. He'd never done
that before either. Spencer's back was smooth and soft, and the curve of his
belly made Brendon's heart clench.
He pushed Spencer until he was sitting against the arm of the couch with his
legs spread, one foot resting on the floor. Brendon didn't fool around, he
settled himself along the length of the couch and wrapped one hand around
Spencer's cock, taking it into his mouth. It was interesting. He was expecting
the size, but not the way the weight felt on his tongue. He hummed
consideringly, and felt Spencer's breath catch and his legs tremble. He did it
again just to feel Spencer shake beneath him.
Spencer said, "Please, Brendon."
Hearing the yearning in Spencer's voice made Brendon feel powerful. He closed
his eyes and began sliding his mouth up and down Spencer's cock, slowly at
first, but picking up steam as he got used to the feel. Spencer made more
gorgeous sounds, as well as praising Brendon and pleading for more. Brendon
hadn't expected Spencer to be so vocal, but he loved it.
Brendon gagged a little bit when he went down too far, and he quickly pulled
back and swallowed through the feeling. He looked up at Spencer, who was
looking back down at him with his lip caught in his teeth. Brendon could read
his face and knew he wanted to beg Brendon to continue, it added to the heady
feeling Brendon had. He said, "Yeah," and resumed sucking Spencer's cock with
renewed vigor.
Spencer's moans egged him on, until finally Spencer said, "Brendon, I'm gonna,
oh god." Brendon tried to swallow, but his throat couldn't work fast enough and
it tasted bitter, so he ended up leaning off the couch and spitting it out onto
his t-shirt. Oh, well, he'd just have to bleach the damn thing.
Spencer had an arm thrown over his eyes and looked wrung out. Brendon was hard
again, but he guessed it would be bad form to rub off against Spencer. Besides,
Spencer could kick his ass, incurring his ire would suck. Instead he climbed to
his hands and knees and then scooted back on the couch, allowing Spencer a
minute to recover.
He couldn't help stroking himself, though. Spencer finally moved his arm, and
looked over at Brendon. His eyebrows shot up. "You want to go again already?"
Brendon shrugged and stilled his hand on his cock. "I liked blowing you."
Dryly, Spencer said, "Apparently." He licked his lips and rubbed his hands down
his thighs. It brought Brendon's gaze back to Spencer's cock, and Brendon's
hand started moving again. "Maybe we could, you know, now."
"I thought you wanted to build up to it." Spencer shrugged and started to look
uncertain. Brendon rushed to say, "Not that I don't want to! I just want to
make sure you're sure."
Squaring his shoulders, Spencer said, "I'm sure."
"I have stuff in the bedroom." When Brendon had prepared for their assignation,
he hadn't imagined they would exchange blowjobs on the couch. He had thought
everything would happen in the bedroom.
Neither of them moved for a second and then they both scrambled up with awkward
laughs. Spencer took Brendon's hand and squeezed it as they walked to the back
and the bedroom. Brendon couldn't stop grinning and didn't feel like a tool
even though his dick was still hard and bobbing up and down as he walked.
Once in the bedroom, Brendon pushed Spencer down on the mattress and said, "Now
I get to have my wicked way with you."
Spencer laughed. "You're such a loser."
Brendon crawled on top of him. "That's not what you were saying when my mouth
was wrapped around your dick."
Spencer blushed. "Shut up."
Kissing him, Brendon did.
They made out for awhile. Brendon wanted Spencer to relax, plus, he loved
kissing. He'd never tell Spencer, but he'd only kissed one other boy before
kissing Spencer earlier. Spencer was a lot better. Finally, Spencer was
boneless beneath him, and Brendon began kissing a slow trail down his chest.
He stopped at Spencer's nipples, giving each a playful nip, but didn't linger
long. Now that he had the go ahead, he didn't want to give Spencer time to
change his mind. He was too eager. When he reached Spencer's cock, he gave it a
long lick and then said, "Maybe you should turn over."
Moaning a little under his breath, Spencer rolled to his side, but then
stopped. "Do you know what you are doing?"
Feeling himself blush, Brendon said, "I did research on the Internet."
With an eye roll, Spencer said, "Oh, that makes me feel so much better. What
did the Internet say?"
Thinking about everything he read, and trying not to get caught up in the
memories of how he jerked off to the descriptions, Brendon tried to summarize.
"It's easier on you if I do it from behind, and I should stretch you with
fingers first."
Spencer gave him a calculating look. "Fingers?"
Reassuringly, Brendon said, "With lube."
Spencer bit his lip and then finished rolling over. "Okay."
Rubbing Spencer's calf to distract him, Brendon took a minute to enjoy the
sight of Spencer spread out in front of him. Spencer's skin was golden and
creamy and his ass had the most inviting curve that Brendon had ever seen.
Brendon leaned down and kissed one ass cheek and Spencer squeaked. Muffling a
laugh against Spencer's skin, Brendon tried to avoid Spencer's flailing hand.
Warningly, Spencer said, "Brendon."
Still chuckling, Brendon just said, "What?" and kissed the other ass cheek with
a loud smack. Spencer flailed at him again and Brendon laughed out loud this
time. "Okay, okay. I'll stop."
He reached to the bedside table and pulled out the lube and condoms he'd bought
last week, blushing hotly the whole time. He'd even gone across town to buy
them, he was so embarrassed. It was worth it now, with Spencer warm and naked
next to him.
Brendon dropped the box of condoms next to Spencer's head, and Spencer picked
them up and began reading the packaging. Brendon rolled his eyes and opened the
lube. While Spencer wrestled the condom box open, Brendon poured some of the
lube into his hand and rubbed his fingers together. It was slick and slightly
cold, surprisingly not oily like he had thought it would be, and it was warming
fast with his body heat.
Taking a deep breath, Brendon leaned down on his other elbow, and rubbed his
slicked fingers along Spencer's ass crack, stopping over Spencer's puckered
flesh. Spencer stiffened immediately. Brendon said, "You need to relax, dude."
"Shut up." Spencer took a couple of deep breaths, but his body remained tense.
Brendon rubbed his fingers, but didn't try and press them in. He said,
"Seriously."
"I said shut up." Brendon rolled his eyes again. Spencer was such a bitch
sometimes. Spencer rolled his shoulders and flexed his feet, and some of the
tension left his body. Not all, but enough. Brendon rubbed his fingers over
Spencer' hole again, seeing if Spencer tensed up. He didn't so Brendon,
continued rubbing lightly, applying more and more pressure with one finger
until it slipped in slightly.
He froze in surprise. So did Spencer.
Experimentally he pushed in further, getting to the second knuckle before
Spencer said, "Stop." Stopping, Brendon's breathing was ragged and there was a
rushing in his ears. Spencer took a couple of deep breaths which seemed to
loosen something inside of him because the tight heat around Brendon's finger
relaxed. He said, "Okay." Brendon began pushing in again, getting his whole
finger in this time. Sliding his finger in and out, he marveled at the feeling.
Warm and tight, he didn't know how his cock was going to fit, but just the
thought of it made it twitch in excitement. They were really doing this.
They built up to three fingers in the same manner. Spencer setting an
excruciatingly slow pace, and Brendon following instructions trying to keep
himself under control. Finally Spencer said, "Well, are you going to do this or
what?" His voice was deeper and husky, and Brendon looked at him in surprise.
He thought he had been the only one getting off on this.
Not answering, he carefully pulled his fingers out and then scrambled up,
climbing in between Spencer's legs. Kneeling there, he reached down and pulled
out one of the condom packets, but it slipped right out of his fingers. Spencer
snorted and rolled to the side, snagging one of the condom packets.
The first packet he opened, the condom went flying across the room and Brendon
laughed this time. Spencer said, "Yeah, yeah, bite me." He opened a second
packet more carefully and handed the condom back to Brendon. "Let's see how
smooth you are when it's your turn." His voice was breathless and the words
rumbled in his throat.
Brendon rolled the condom on, luckily getting it right the first time. He no
longer felt stupid for having wasted a box practicing by himself. He pulled on
Spencer's hips, getting him onto his knees, and man, wasn't that a sight to
treasure? Spencer crossed his arms and rested his head on them, hiding his
face.
Taking a deep breath, Brendon said, "Okay?"
Spencer nodded but refrained from snarky comments, which Brendon knew meant he
was really nervous. Brendon wanted to say he was nervous too, not to worry, but
he remained silent.
Instead he took hold of his cock, and, quickly, had to then grab hold of the
base, because he hadn't realized how close to the edge he was. He tightened his
hold until he felt the urge to come lessen, and then guided it towards
Spencer's ass. Pushing in, feeling Spencer's ass tighten like a vice around
him, the roaring in his ears came back.
Spencer grunted, and Brendon froze in panic, but Spencer just shook his head
and pushed his ass back. His heart beating fast, Brendon resumed pressing in,
until he was flush against Spencer. "Oh, god." He rocked against Spencer's ass
and hurriedly said, "I'm sorry," as he felt the rush of orgasm overtake him and
his hips snapped forward.
Slumping over Spencer, Brendon was in a haze. Suddenly, clear as a bell,
Spencer said, "You have got to be kidding me."
Brendon started laughing.
Brendon's softened cock slipped out of Spencer as loud guffaws erupted out of
him. Spencer tried to roll to the side and began swatting at Brendon again.
"You suck, Urie."
"I'm so sorry." Brendon finally fell to the side still laughing. The condom was
hanging off his cock, and he tried to strip it off as he avoided Spencer's
smacks. Getting it off, he dropped it into the wastebasket, and then just laid
there on his back, panting.
That had been the most divine feeling in the universe and he wanted to do it
all over again, but his cock was completely spent. He looked over at Spencer
who had finally stopped hitting him. Spencer was frowning, but his eyes were
crinkling. A laugh barked out of Brendon, and Spencer shook his head, and
ducked to hide his own smile. Brendon pointed at him and laughed harder.
Finally Spencer started laughing too.
When they finally both calmed down again, Brendon said, "I really am sorry. I'd
love to try again." They were lying crosswise on the bed, with their arms
around each other.
Spencer snorted. "Oh, I bet you would. But me first, all right?" He looked at
Brendon, biting his lip.
Brendon hadn't lied about wanting to try everything. He said, "Definitely. But
sleep first, yeah?"
Spencer snuggled close and with a kiss said, "Yeah." They realigned the covers
and themselves, and with a couple more kisses, closed their eyes. Brendon
couldn't wait until later when he was more awake. He just hoped Spencer had
more stamina than he did.
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