Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/12231420.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Rape/Non-Con, Underage, Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence
  Category:
      Multi
  Fandom:
      小林さんちのメイドラゴン_|_Kobayashi-san_Chi_no_Maid_Dragon_|_Miss_Kobayashi's_Dragon
      Maid
  Relationship:
      Kobayashi/Tohru_(Miss_Kobayashi's_Dragon_Maid), Kanna_Kamui/Saikawa_Riko,
      Elma/Iruru, Lucoa/OC
  Character:
      Kobayashi_(Miss_Kobayashi's_Dragon_Maid), Tohru_(Miss_Kobayashi's_Dragon
      Maid), Kanna_Kamui, Saikawa_Riko, Quetzalcoatl_"Lucoa"_(Miss_Kobayashi's
      Dragon_Maid), Elma_(Miss_Kobayashi's_Dragon_Maid), Fafnir_(Miss
      Kobayashi's_Dragon_Maid), Takiya_Makoto, Ilulu_(Miss_Kobayashi's_Dragon
      Maid), Magatsuchi_Shouta
  Additional Tags:
      Molestation, Drama, Psychological_Trauma, Hurt/Comfort, Family_Issues,
      Homosexuality, Unrequited_Love, Past_Child_Abuse, Past_Sexual_Abuse,
      Violent_Sex, Post-Traumatic_Stress_Disorder_-_PTSD, Implied/Referenced
      Domestic_Violence, Underage_Relationship(s), Rare_Relationships, Therapy,
      Guilt, large_family, Female-Centric, Futanari, Transformation,
      Masturbation, Mother-Daughter_Relationship, Father-Daughter_Relationship,
      Origami, Family_Member_Death, Dragon_sex, Bigender, Married_Couple,
      Married_Sex, Crisis_of_Faith, Gender_Issues, Immigration_&_Emigration,
      Hyperlink_Story, Adoption, Sibling_Love, Adopted_Sibling_Relationship,
      Interspecies_Romance, Interspecies_Sex, Doctors_&_Physicians, Threesome_-
      F/F/M, Threesome_-_F/F/F, Leadership, Family_Drama, Family_Bonding,
      Fictional_Religion_&_Theology, Open_Relationships, Sadism, Religious
      Content, Revenge, Soldiers, Mages, Murder, Queer_Themes, Dimension
      Travel, Identity_Issues, Urban_Fantasy, Protective_Siblings, Fatherhood,
      Motherhood, Meeting_the_Parents, Twins, Bedroom_Sex, Same-Sex_Marriage,
      Procreative_Sex, Reunion_Sex, Semi-Public_Sex, Age_Difference, Tail_Sex,
      Femdom, Bisexuality, Impregnation, Pregnant_Sex
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-10-01 Updated: 2018-03-20 Chapters: 11/? Words: 26112
****** Just A Child ******
by JohnnyMueller
Summary
     They saw her as a mighty dragon, one to rise above all.
     They saw her as someone to take care of, a cute girl that was pure
     above all.
     But, more than anything else, she was just a child. And that created
     a world of difference for everyone.
***** The Start of All Things *****
                            The Start of All Things
A cool autumn breeze went through the trees, a single sunset-colored leaf
falling to the ground. They were outside for gym today, with everyone doing
their own thing. Kanna was running laps with some of the other girls. She could
have done 50 of those in the time it took her classmates to do one, but she
wanted to seem normal. Too much, and there would be questions she didn’t want
to deal with. Besides, she liked going at a human’s pace; it seemed so relaxing
compared to being a dragon.
“A dragon should think little of humans. There are mere specks floating by
compared to us.”
The elders were wrong about that. They were wrong about everything concerning
humans.
The bell rang and the class was heading inside.
“Kanna-chan?” A soft voice came from behind her. She recognized it as Mr.
Sunohara, the Phys Ed teacher. He was a young man, a bit older than Kobayashi,
with soft brown hair and deep blue eyes. “Could you help me with something in
the equipment room? It won’t take too long.”
She nodded. She liked Mr. Sunohara; he reminded her of her older brother back
home. She missed him. I miss all of them.
As it turned out, he needed her to help him count all of the soccer balls;
there was going to be a tournament held there soon, and they need to make sure
that they had enough. She was a bit puzzled about why he needed her help, but
she shrugged it off.
It only took about two minutes. Mr. Sunohara smiled at her. “Thanks, Kanna-
chan. You know, you’re such a good girl, so well-raised, so quiet.”
She felt a shadow go over her as he touched her shoulder.
*
Tohru was humming some tune to herself as she was cooking.
I think that’s the one about humans drowning in their own bile. She preferred
that one over the one about pillaging and ravaging entire villages.
It had been a quiet evening; Kanna had spent most of it doing her homework and
Tohru… well, she had been herself.
“Miss Kobayashi, dinner’s almost ready!”
“Ah.” She then thought of something as a precautionary measure. “Your tail’s
not in this stir-fry, is it?”
“U-Uh, no! Of course not! Geez, you’re so silly, Miss Kobayashi!”
Really? And what’s that I hear you throwing in the trash?
She noticed something. Or rather, a lack of something.
“Tohru, have you seen Kanna-chan?”
“Mmm, she’s been in her room for a while. You don’t think something is wrong
with you, do you?”
Kobayashi stood up. “I don’t think so.” She walked over to the bedroom and
knocked. “Kanna-chan, dinner’s almost ready.” She didn’t hear anything. She
knocked again. “Kanna-chan, are you OK?” She could hear something now, if she
focused hard enough. A soft whimper. She opened the door.
She wished it was anything else. Even if Kanna had thrown up everywhere from
some goddamn flu, she would have been fine with that. But this…
Kanna was on her bed, her back towards Kobayashi. A pillow was up next to her
face, bite marks having ripped out part of its inside. The young dragon was
trembling all over, shaking, and red blood was creating small streams down her
legs, going over the back of her knee and ending up on the bed.
Kobayashi rushed over. “Kanna-chan!” She turned the girl so that she was on her
back. She could now see the tears rushing down her face and her hands gripping
her stomach.
“Ko-Kobayashi… i-it hurts…” She closed her eyes and gritted her teeth as a wave
of pain rushed over her.
Kobayashi heard footsteps behind her. Tohru was right next to her.
“Hold her, Tohru. I’ll call for an ambulance.” She had never noticed before how
light Kanna seemed when she was passing her over to Tohru. As she got her cell
phone, she prayed to whatever gods existed.
Please, anyone, help her.
*
It had been a quiet night, as falls tended to be. He had only been called for a
sprained ankle and a head injury; nothing major, would heal in a few days.
Yamato Senjou had been working here for 6 years after finishing his residency
in Tokyo. He had chosen Koshigaya due to it being quieter than Tokyo while
still being a large town. He planned to spend the rest of his career here. The
only dissatisfaction he currently had about himself was that he was 35 and
still not married.
His cell phone rang. “Senjou here.”
“Hey, Doctor. We’ve got an 8-year-old female coming in.”
“Ah. Any injuries?”
“She’s complaining of stomach cramps, and there’s vaginal bleeding.”
“Oh.” Either one of these things wouldn’t have been too much of a problem. The
cramps would’ve most likely been a stomach bug; the bleeding would’ve been a
bit worrisome, but most likely they would have been dealing with a vaginal
infection.
Both, at the same time, though? Something bad was going on.
He found himself somewhat glad that he had decided to specialize in both
pediatrics and gynecology. It had seemed an odd idea to him at first, but it
made him quite the attractive property when he was looking for hospitals to
work at. It was also critical for cases like this, thankfully rare as they
were.
He got to the room that he was told the patient, a Kanna Kobayashi, was in, and
knocked on the door before entering. There were three people inside: the girl,
who was in a medical down, and two women, most likely in their twenties. Her
guardians, I would guess.
“Hello. My name is Yamato, and I will be Kanna-chan’s doctor today.”
“It’s nice to meet you.” The redhead went to him and shook his hand. He noticed
how it trembled. “My name is ----- Kobayashi, and this is Tohru.”
“Nice to meet you as well.” He got into his chair and looked at Kanna, who was
staring straight ahead at the wall. “So, Kanna-chan, can you tell me what
brings you in today?”
The girl looked at him, and he noticed her eyes. It seemed like they were
removed from the situation, that they were staring at something that didn’t
exist.
“I-It hurts…”
“What hurts, Kanna-chan?”
She pointed at her stomach.
“How bad does it hurt?”
She sniffled and cried. “I-I-It doesn’t feel good…”
“I see.” He thought of how to phrase his next sentence. “Kanna-chan, does it
hurt around her private parts?” He felt Kobayashi and Tohru stare at him as he
said that.
Kanna looked at him confused. “What d-do you mean?”
“The part of your body that your underwear covers, does that hurt?”
The girl’s eyes widened in what he guessed was shock, even as she nodded.
Please, don’t let this be what I think it is…
“Kanna-chan… would you feel comfortable showing me where it hurts on your
body?”
The girl froze in place. She started staring at the door, breathing heavily.
“Kanna-chan.” The redhaired woman sat next to her and rubbed her hair. “If you
don’t want to do it, it’s alright.”
The girl looked down at her lap for a moment, before slowly lifting up her gown
until her pubic area was visible. Yamato had to restrain his temper for a
moment.
There was significant bruising already, most of it having turned purple and
dark blue. Her labia had swollen and become puffy, and there was dried blood
all around it. There were also marks on her hips which looked like handprints.
“Umm…” He had seen this before; two or three times a year, one of these cases
would come in and make him reconsider his profession. “Kobayashi-san, may I
speak to you outside?”
“O-Of course.” The woman was just as horrified as she was, the blood having
drained from her face. She moved towards the door while the other woman got
over to Kanna and held her close.
She’s going to need as much of that as she can get.
*
She needed to be dreaming. It wasn’t a wish or even a want, it was a need.
Because this wasn’t happening, this couldn’t be happening, this should not be
happening.
“Who-Who-Who-“ She felt herself hyperventilate, but she paid little attention
to her body. “Who would do something like this?”
“People like this exist in the world, as much as we wish to deny it.” The
doctor’s face had become grim, almost like a man walking to the firing squad.
“I’m sorry this happened to Kanna.”
This didn’t happen, you fucking idiot! She had to calm down; she wasn’t going
to let this overcome her. “So… what happens now?”
“I’d suggest we contact the police. There’s a detective I’ve worked with before
for cases involving rape.”
Her head nodded by itself. “What will happen to Kanna-chan?”
“I’d administer a full pelvic exam, then the detective would ask her some
questions. Of course, we wouldn’t have to do either of them tonight, if Kanna
doesn’t want to. The only thing I worry about is any loss of evidence from
degradation.” His voice seemed to fade in and out, like a radio with a bad
frequency. But she understood what he was saying. “Kobayashi-san.” That seemed
clearer.
“Trauma is something that affects everyone in the nearby vicinity, even if they
weren’t there. It’s quite contagious, even if nobody talks about it. Actually,
it’s more contagious when nobody talks about it.” He pulled out a small thing
of paper and gave it to her. “My card, if you need somebody to talk to.”
She nodded. “Thank you.”
“Of course. I’ll go make the call.” He walked down the hallway and disappeared
around a corner. Kobayashi went back into the room. Kanna was sitting in
Tohru’s lap, sobbing into her chest, while Tohru held her close. The dragon
looked at Kobayashi, tears streaming down her face.
Kobayashi sat next to him and hugged both of them. Her guard that seemed ever-
present on her faded and she began to cry as well.
“I’m so sorry, Kanna-chan… I’m sorry…”
For a while, the only thing she could feel was a deep emptiness that had to be
let out. It was all she could.
No platitudes will fix this. I don’t know what can.
***** Questions *****
                                   Questions
Kobayashi heard the door open. The doctor was walking in, with a nurse.
“Hey there. This is Yasuko; she’ll be assisting me.” He sat next to them.
“Kanna-chan, we’d like to do what’s called a pelvic exam. We’d be looking at
your private parts for injuries and evidence of what happened to you. You don’t
have to do this today, if that’s alright; you could come in tomorrow morning,
if you want to.”
“C’mon, Kanna, you can do it. It’s not going to be that much of a big deal.”
Kobayashi didn’t know why she didn’t like the tone in Tohru’s voice, but it was
bothering her.
“Don’t say things like that.” She hissed into the dragon’s ear. She looked down
at Kanna, who was looking up at her. “Hey, Kanna-chan, if you don’t want to do
this, it’s perfectly fine; we can go home and you could do it tomorrow morning.
You don’t have to think about it right now.”
Kanna looked down for a moment before saying, “I want to…” A pause, a moment.
“I want to do it.”
Kobayashi nodded slightly, before looking back. She could see her own face
reflected in Dr. Yamato’s. I guess then it’s now. “OK, Kanna-chan.” She and Dr.
Yamato helped get her onto the examining table in the room. Kobayashi noticed
that Kanna’s hand had never left hers.
“Alright, Kanna-chan, I need you to lift your legs up until they’re halfway to
your chest, OK?” The young dragon nodded before doing what he said. He then
placed two stirrups underneath her legs that spread them slightly.
“Now, Yasuko and I are going to be examining your pelvic area. We’ll be taking
pictures and taking swabs for evidence. If, at any moment, you feel
uncomfortable, you tell me or Kobayashi-san, OK?” The girl nodded and he began.
She couldn’t bear to look. She was still thinking about the glimpse she saw
earlier. She knew things like this happened, but more in the theoretical sense.
She knew it in the same way that she knew she could be killed by a careening
car, or that her part of the world could be blown and irradiated by some
asshole up north. She knew it could happen, but she didn’t believe it would
happen to her.
“Bruising around the pelvic area, including the labia. Bruising on the hips in
the shape of hands.” The shutter of a camera was playing after each sentence.
“A small laceration on the labia, around half an inch or so. Kanna-chan, I’m
going to placing a ruler near you so the camera shows the length of your cut,
OK?”
Kanna nodded, but then shuddered as the ruler was near her. The girl gripped
Kobayashi’s hand tightly, and she returned it.
“There’s dried blood around the labia and semifrequent discharge, mostly
blood.” He looked at Kanna. “Kanna-chan, I’m going to be placing my fingers
inside of you to check for any injuries. Is that OK?”
Kanna nodded slowly.
“OK. If you feel uncomfortable, just tell me, and I’ll stop.” Slowly, Dr.
Yamato moved his hand. She could hear Kanna’s soft groan as her hand was
somehow squeezed even tighter. She hadn’t even noticed that Tohru was grabbing
Kanna’s other hand, looking at the doctor with the fury of a thousand suns.
“There are quite a few lacerations inside. Some bruising as well. No distention
as far as I can see.” The nurse handed him several cotton swabs. “Kanna-chan,
I’m going to take several swabs now for evidence. If you don’t feel well, just
say something.” He took four swabs and placed each of them in a plastic bag.
Kanna just stared at the ceiling.
She’s so brave, braver than I would have ever been…
“Alright, then. That’s it, we’re done.” Dr. Yamato put the stirrups away and
helped Kanna sit on the table. “You were a good girl, Kanna-chan.”
Just as he was about to touch her shoulder, Kanna slapped his hand away and
backed up to the wall. She curled up and started crying, shaking all over.
“Kanna-” Tohru was trying to get close to her, but then Kanna got off the table
and placed herself next to the door. She was breaking down now, clearly in
distress.
“H-H-H-He said I-I-I…” She couldn’t complete her sentence as another wave of
pain went over her and blood dripped from her body.
What do I do? I have to do something, she’s my girl, I can’t just let her be in
pain like this! Kobayashi was starting to hyperventilate.
“I think I have an idea.” Dr. Yamato walked towards the door and looked down at
the girl. “Kanna-chan, I’m going to open the door. If you want to walk outside,
that is fine.” He opened the door.
Slowly, Kanna began to look at the open space that was available to her. She
peaked her head out a little bit, then more, then more.
Dr. Yamato squatted onto the ground. “Do you feel better, Kanna-chan?” Kanna
looked at him and shook her head yes. He smiled. “Good. Kanna-chan, I’m sorry
about before; I should have been more careful with what I said and did. Do you
accept my apology?” She nodded. “Good.”
She looked out for a moment, before holding her stomach.
“Is something wrong, Kanna-chan? Does your stomach hurt?”
She shook her head no. “I need the bathroom.”
“Oh, I see. Well, Yasuko-chan will take you there.”
The nurse walked over to Kanna and picked her up, holding her hand as the two
of them walked out.
Dr. Yamato’s phone buzzed. “Ah, that’s my friend. Are you two OK with staying
here while I get here?”
It took Kobayashi a moment to remember he even existed. “Ah, yes, of course.”
“Alright.” He walked out, his footsteps slowly disappearing down the hallway.
Kobayashi sat down in one of the chairs, his body collapsing into it.
What she just saw seemed like a play, like someone was doing this to her for a
reason. There has to be a reason. She looked over at Tohru, who was staring at
the blood on the ground.
I’ll have to keep watch over her. Who knows what she might do?
Who knows whatI might do?
*
Yamato was polite as always as he opened her driver’s door. And annoying.
“You don’t have to do that, you know.”
“I do know. And I still want to.”
Hina Yamazaki sighed. “So, what do we have?”
“Kanna Kobayashi, 8-years-old. Lives here in Koshigaya, goes to Oborozuka
Elementary. Lives with her cousin and her maid.”
“Maid? Who the fuck has a maid?”
“Yeah, I’m not so sure that ‘maid’ is her occupation. Anyway, Kanna was found
by her cousin, ------ Kobayashi, writhing in pain and having blood dripping
down her legs. When I examined her, I found bruising on and around her labia
and vulva, and there were several lacerations when I examined her internally.
She was definitely raped, and since there were no signs of any foreign objects,
I believe it to be a male.”
“Any evidence about who it was?”
“I didn’t find any pubic hairs, but I did take several swabs, so hopefully
you’ll find something there.” He stopped. “She’s in this room. By the way,
words of caution: Don’t touch her without telling her you’re going to, or call
her a good girl. Both of those seem to be triggers.”
“Thanks.” She entered the room. Four people, the girl sitting on the bed,
Yasuko, and the women who seemed to be the girl’s guardians.
“Hey, Kanna-chan.” Yamato sat in front of the girl. “This is my friend, Hina.
She’s a detective, and she’d like to ask you a few questions about what
happened, if that’s alright.”
Kanna looked at her, then nodded. She seemed like a quiet girl, someone polite
and demure.
Perfect target.
“Hi there, Kanna. I understand that you may be uncomfortable answering my
questions, and that’s fine; most people in your situation would be. So, if you
don’t feel like answering a question, you don’t have to, OK?”
Kanna nodded.
“OK then. Now, can you tell me where you were attacked?”
Kanna’s eyes went to the side, towards her guardians. They stayed there as she
started to fidget. The girl made a “come closer” motion with her hand. Hina
leaned forward, and Kanna put her mouth right next to her ear.
“Can I be alone?”
Hina was confused for a moment, but then understood.
“Of course, Kanna.” She looked at the two women. “Would it be OK if Kanna and
myself were alone for this? You could wait outside in the hallway if you wanted
to.”
The one dressed as a maid stood up quickly, her face a visage of fury, before
the other one stood up. “Yes, it will be fine.” She went over to the girl.
“Kanna-chan, we’ll be right outside if you need us.” She took the maid’s hand
and went outside, with Yamato and Yasuko following suit. Hina closed the door
and sat back down.
“There, do you feel better now?” Kanna nodded. “I understand that it can be
difficult talking about this, but you should know that there is no shame in
what happened to you.”
“But what if I do?”
“What do you mean?”
Kanna looked around the room, trying to find the words she wanted to use. “I… I
didn’t want Kobayashi and Lady Tohru in here because… I was…” Her face slowly
went red.
“Hey, it’s understandable that you feel embarrassed. That’s nothing to be
ashamed of, either, OK?” The girl nodded. “Good. Now then, can you tell me
where it happened?”
“I-In the equipment shed. At my school.”
“I see. And when did this occur?”
“Right after gym. We were playing outside, and he-” Kanna stopped, and started
to cry.
“Hey, it’s OK. You don’t have to tell me what exactly happened, OK?” Kanna
nodded, but she still sobbed as she wiped her tears with the sleeve of her
hospital gown.
“Now, Kanna, can you at least tell me his name?”
Kanna’s eyes widened and she shook her head quickly. “No, no, I-I can’t…”
“Kanna, it’s alright. If you tell me his name, he will not hurt you.”
“B-But he’ll hurt Saikawa.”
“Who’s Saikawa?”
“M-My f-friend. He s-said that i-i-if I said h-his name, h-h-h-he’ll h-h-hurt-
t-t-t…” The girl was stuttering his words now.
“Kanna. I promise you. If you tell me his name, he will not you or your friend
or anyone else ever again.” She wanted to add something about what would happen
if she stayed silent, but she thought that too much.
The girl seemed to think things over in her mind as she rubbed the salt and
snot from her face. “M-M-Mister Sunoha-ha-hara. He’s our g-gym teacher.”
“OK. And after he… finished, what happened?”
“H-H-He left, and I g-g-g-got dress-ss-ss-ssed.”
“OK. That’s all the questions I have right now, Kanna.” She looked over at a
shelf in the room. The girl’s clothes were on there in a bag, along with a
child-size hoodie, a skirt, and a pair of shoes.
Yamato always knows the procedure. Good man. Except as a mate.
“Can I-I-I go back now?”
“Yes, you can. Here,” she handed the girl the clothes. “Change yourself first.
I’ll be outside.”
As she closed the door to give the girl privacy, she looked at the bag in her
hand. To be honest, her choice of clothing seemed somewhat odd.
Looks like someone an Ainu would wear… Maybe she’s from the Kuril Islands.
“I’m done.” Kanna was dressed, although the hoodie seemed a bit too long for
her, since it went down to her knees.
“Alright.” Hina held her hand out and Kanna took it, the two of them walking
down the hallway.
Eventually, they reached the waiting room, where Kanna’s two guardians seemed
to be in something of a heated argument. That was until the normal-looking one
saw Kanna.
“Hey, sweetie.” Kanna went into the woman’s arms, who lifted her up. “You
feeling better?” The girl nodded slightly. Kobayashi then looked over at Hina.
“Thank you for everything. All of you.”
“It’s nothing major, we’re just doing our jobs. Would you like a ride home?”
The woman holding Kanna blushed slightly. “Oh, no, we couldn’t be so improper
as burden you with us.”
Hina raised an eyebrow slightly. The woman caught herself in what she said and
looked down at Kanna.
“I guess that doesn’t matter tonight.”
Thought so. “You can sit in the back.” She looked over at Yamato. “Be sure to
get those swabs to Tokyo.”
“Gotcha, Hina. See you, Kanna-chan.” The doctor and the nurse left after giving
Kanna a small wave.
Hina got all of them into her car, and after receiving directions as to their
home, she started driving. She kept looking back at them. The girl was looking
at the floor, motionless, the woman was looking out of the window, and the maid
had her hand ruffling Kanna’s hair.
They look like a nice family. Shame it happened to them.
Shame it happens to anyone.
*
“Lady Tohru, could you sleep with me?”
She looked down at Kanna. After everything she heard about what happened to
Kanna, she wanted to find this teacher, this educator, who hurt her and tear
him limb from limb, heal him, and then repeat this process until that bastard
could no longer feel pain.
But Miss Kobayashi, she knew better. As much as she loathed to admit that in
this case, she knew better.
“There are systems of justice in place for this, Tohru! You can’t just go out
and kill people without a trial or some form of due process! Things are
different here.”
So, she stayed her anger, especially when that shithead doctor told them to
move to the waiting room because they were disturbing the other patients.
Partially, it was also because she had a feeling Kanna would be upset about
that.
“Of course, Kanna, I’ll sleep with you tonight.” She didn’t say as long as you
need it; she didn’t want to encourage any habits.
“Can Kobayashi?”
“Um… I’ll go ask her.” She walked to Miss Kobayashi’s bedroom and knocked.
“Miss Kobayashi?”
The door opened. Miss Kobayashi was in her sleepclothes, with her hair down.
“What is it, Tohru?”
“Kanna was wondering if you would want to sleep with her tonight.”
“Oh, sure.” Miss Kobayashi and herself walked over into Kanna’s bedroom. The
girl looked over. “Hey, Kanna-chan. Ready for bed?” The girl nodded, and the
two of them got into bed with the young dragon, keeping a slight distance.
“Kanna-chan… you don’t want to go back to school tomorrow, do you?”
Tohru glared at Miss Kobayashi. It’s not like she can’t walk or anything.
Kanna thought about it, then nodded her head.
“Alright, then. You can decide to go back whenever you want, you take as long
as you need and want, OK?”
“OK… Um, Kobayashi?”
“What is it, Kanna-chan?” Miss Kobayashi had a slight, wistful smile to her
face.
“You’re a bit close.” During their conversation, Miss Kobayashi had gotten very
close to Kanna.
“Oh, sorry.” Miss Kobayashi backed up slightly.
“Kanna,” the girl turned around to face Tohru, “you do know you’ll have to go
back eventually. You can’t just lie around here all day; you’re not going to
get any better th-”
“Tohru.” Miss Kobayashi glared at her over Kanna, who had started to blush and
turned herself onto her back.
“Sorry.” She murmured that as she turned away from Miss Kobayashi.
I had it right. I know I did. Miss Kobayashi can’t just coddle her forever. She
has to go back. She can’t stay here all day.
If she does, then she’ll just think about… No, I can’t, that’s gone, that’s in
the past.
Tohru tried to hide her shudder as screams and the sounds of the dead echoed in
her head.
*
She was the last one to wake up. The bed felt so empty, so odd without anyone.
Did they leave me behind?
She walked into the main area. Tohru was making breakfast while Kanna was
sitting on the couch, looking outside.
“Kanna-chan?” The dragon didn’t respond. She got closer. “Kanna-chan?” The girl
looked at her. Her eyes had a slight haziness to them. “How long have you been
up?”
Kanna shrugged. “A while. I couldn’t sleep.”
“I understand. Just promise me you’ll take a nap today, OK?” Kanna nodded.
Kobayashi then looked over to Tohru. She hadn’t said a single word since she
walked in.
Is she still upset about last night? “Tohru?”
“Yes, Miss Kobayashi?” Her voice sounded the same, but there was an
undercurrent of… her best guess would be aggravation.
Not now, another time. “Nothing.”
She thought she heard a “hrmph” from Tohru, but she wasn’t going to ask.
After breakfast, she got ready to leave. She was about to hold the door for
Kanna when she remembered she wasn’t going to school today.
“You two take care of yourselves, OK?”
The lack of silence felt so ambivalent, since it felt like two different
responses from the people inside.
As she left, Kobayashi looked around her surrounds. The buildings that she had
ignored beforehand seemed to be so enclosing, like it only gave her a narrow
way to go and frowned upon any deviation.
Nobody told me it was going to be this hard to figure out whether I’m doing the
right thing.
She knew she was doing it. And she knew Tohru was as well.
But for some reason that she damned to the lowest pit of hell, she couldn’t
admit that to herself.
***** Hesitant Response *****
                               Hesitant Response
All day, she had been odd. Sure, she seemed like her usual self, but there were
little indications. Like the fact that her smiles went a bit too far up her
face. Or the fact that she always seemed surprised when anyone began to talk to
her. Something had happened, but he couldn’t think about what it could be to
change her so much. Part of that reason was he was distracted by his own
troubles.
I don’t know what to say to him… I can’t think of the right words… I’m not
risking that again…
“Hey, Kobayashi-san.”
There it was, that slight jump and nervous glance. “Yes, Takiya?”
“You doing OK today?”
“Umm… yeah, I’m, I’m doing alright.”
He didn’t believe that, not for a moment. He knew her too well.
“You sure about that?”
Her fingers hovered over the keyboard for a moment.
“There is… something, but I don’t want to talk about it.”
“OK, that’s fine. Just… if you need help, you can ask, you know?”
Kobayashi looked at him out of the corner of her eyes. She seemed afraid to
look at him. “Yeah, I know.”
The two of them continued to work, heedless of what was now between them.
What else can we do?
*
The bell rang, and everyone else around her stood up. Except for her. It felt
like there was a weight on her legs and there was no way for her to remove
them. She looked at the seat that had been empty the whole day.
Kanna-san wasn’t there. She hadn’t come to school. The teacher didn’t say
anything about it, but whenever the conversation turned to her, she looked
weird, like she ate something sour.
Something happened to her. I know it did. I have to go there, but I’m scared…
Riko was asked to take Kanna-san’s homework to her home, which made some of the
other kids chuckle. People had always made fun of her for how she acted around
Kanna-san, how she fawned over her and always acted weird around her.
So what if I l-l-l-Trying to say the word even inside herself was hard, making
her face turn red and her insides churn. So what if I care about her a lot?
That doesn’t mean anything!
As she was walking down the streets, she held her coat close to her. Today was
colder than yesterday, the wind cutting through her. She felt it down to her
bones. They said it wasn’t supposed to be cold today… maybe it’s one of those
freak events.
The building was in front of her now, the bricks stacked against each other
like a fireplace. As she walked up, she thought she felt someone looking at her
from the street, but when she looked, she saw nothing.
Something’s weird about today…
She knocked on the door. She heard steps coming to it, heavy, hard steps.
The door opened, and she saw Miss Tohru. She looked… different. Normally, the
maid would be all smiles and happy to see Riko. But her face wasn’t like that.
It seemed kinda sad.
“Ah, Saikawa. What are you doing here?” Her voice, although trying to be
friendly, was low and hard to hear, kinda like she had a cold. Maybe Kanna-san
got sick?
“Um… my teacher asked me to come here with Kanna-san’s homework.” She took the
papers out of her backpack and gave it to the maid.
“Ah, thank you so much.” She turned halfway, but stopped, tapping her finger on
the homework. “Saikawa?”
“Yes, Miss Tohru?”
“Would…” The maid looked inside for a moment before looking back at Riko.
“Would you be willing to talk to Kanna?”
Kanna-san?! “Is- Is she all right?”
Tohru looked back. “For the most part. But… she’s barely talked today, and I…”
She gripped her arm, her nails almost looking like they were longer underneath
her gloves. “If someone she knew talked to her, I think she would be able to
get over things faster.
“Is that OK with you, Saikawa?”
Riko’s brain was going haywire. M-Me talking t-t-to K-K-K-K-Kanna-san?! It
sounds important, but… I’m so worried… What if I say the wrong thing? What if
she gets worse? What if she hates me…
No, I can’t be thinking about myself! This is for Kanna-san, to get her better!
“Yes, I can stay, but could I call my parents first?”
“Of course. The phone is right in the living room.”
After calling her parents and telling her that, yes, she was safe, and that she
would be at Kanna-san for a bit, she went to the girl’s room and knocked on the
door.
“Kanna-san, i-it’s me, Saikawa. Is it OK if I come in?”
No response. How bad is she? Images flashed through her head, of Kanna-san
wrapped in white material, barely looking alive, not paying attention to
anything. Please… don’t let it be like that.
She opened the door. Kanna-san… well, she was surprised in how normal she
looked, except for the fact that her hair was loose. She didn’t appear injured
or sick or anything like that. She was sitting on her bed, staring at the wall.
She didn’t look at Riko as she walked in; she didn’t even seem to know that she
was inside her room.
“K-Kanna-san…”
Kanna-san blinked, then again. Then she looked at Riko. Her eyes were red, and
tear stains were on her face.
Kanna-san… what happened…
“Saikawa.”
The girl got onto Kanna-san’s bed. Kanna-san moved a little bit away from her.
“Ah! I-I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you!”
“No… it’s OK.” Kanna-san curled into herself, her knees touching her chin.
“Um… I brought your homework here. Miss Tohru has it.”
Kanna-san nodded, still staring at her bed. She looked so different from the
girl she knew. The one who was strong, curious, who always wanted to interact
with others.
“Kanna-san… What happened?”
Kanna-san looked over. She opened her mouth slightly, then closed it. Her body
shuddered as Kanna-san began to cry, her whole body reacting.
“K-K-Kanna-san!” As she got closer to her, Kanna-san grabbed Riko’s body and
held it close to her, her tears staining the girl’s dress.
Riko’s blood threatened to boil. In any other moment, this would be her dream:
to have Kanna-san so close to her. But this wasn’t right. Kanna-san was crying
hard into her. Everything felt like a nightmare. She held Kanna-san close to
her and rubbed her back, giving her whatever comfort she could.
“Please, Saikawa. Stay.”
“O-Of course, Kanna-san! I’ll stay, as long as you need me!” I’ll always be
here.
“M-Mister Sunohara… He hurt me…”
W-What. Mister Sunohara, the gym teacher… He wouldn’t, he couldn’t… she didn’t
look hurt… but Kanna-san wouldn’t lie…
“K-Kanna-san… I’m sorry… I’m sorry he hurt you…”
Kanna-san looked up at her. Her crying had stopped somewhat. “Saikawa.”
“Yes, Kanna-san?” The girl’s gaze was so deep, so pure.
Kanna-san placed her hands on Riko’s cheeks and pulled her close. She placed
her lips onto hers.
Riko felt like she was outside her body. Her body was heating up like a tea
kettle on the stove. Kanna-san’s lips were soft on her stone-hard lips. She
felt herself disintegrate into a pool of liquid, only able to remember the
kiss, her past and her future being erased. She felt complete, like everything
in her life didn’t matter but for what she had found right now at this moment.
Sadly, Kanna-san separated from her. Her face was solely focused on the person
in front of her. She felt unworthy to be sitting here in front of her, to even
be in the same country.
“K-K-Kanna-san, why’d you do that?!”
Kanna-san looked up at her, shocked. “I-I’m sorry… I shouldn’t…”
“No! I didn’t mind it, at all! I… I just wanted to know why…”
Kanna-san looked down for a moment. “I wanted to kiss you… like Mother and
Father did…”
Kanna-san’s parents… She had always wondered what they were like, but Kanna-san
never said anything. Whenever the subject came up, Kanna-san moved it to
something else.
“Whenever I’m around you, Saikawa, I feel warm. I feel safe. I want to be
around you always. I want to wake up next to you every morning.” Kanna-san
looked up at her with such warm eyes. “I want us to be together.” Kanna-san
looked down. “I understand if you think I’m weird-”
“No!” Kanna-san looked shocked at what she said, but she had to say it. “I l-
love you, Kanna-san! I want to be with you, and marry you, and have children
with you, and spend the rest of my life with you!” She held Kanna-san close to
her. “I love you!”
She felt Kanna-san nod. “I love you too.” Riko felt tears on her shoulder, but
she couldn’t tell if it was Kanna-san’s or her own.
“Saikawa?”
“What is it?”
“Could you stay a bit longer?”
Riko let Kanna-san go so she could look at her face. It was hard to tell
through her salty eyes, but it looked like Kanna-san was staring deeply into
her. Whatever you see inside is yours, always and forever.
“I’ll stay as long as you want, Kanna-san. I’ll always be here.”
*
The bar was slightly packed that evening, but they were able to get a table
with nobody around. Well, nobody that would remember their conversation the
next day.
Kobayashi had done little but drink her beer and draw shapes on the table with
her fingers.
What do I say to him? To anyone? I can barely even talk about it to myself or
Kanna-chan, what can I say to someone without the faintest idea about what
happened?
“Kobayashi-san.” She looked up at Takiya. “Are you sure you’re handling things
OK?”
Kobayashi sat back in her chair. “I… I’m not sure.”
Why not?
“Yesterday, someone attacked Kanna-chan. A teacher of her’s, he…. he raped
her.”
All the blood drained from Takiya’s face as he put his drink down. “What?”
“Yeah. He… he did it, and I…” She started to cry. “I can’t imagine why.” I can,
but I can’t. “And…” She shrugged. I don’t know what to do. Nobody ever told me
how to do this, how to hand this kind of thing.
Takiya seemed like he was going to say something, but then reconsidered. He
tapped his finger on the table. “I’m sorry.”
She nodded. She looked at everyone around her, all of those people getting
drunk without any thought.
“Hey, Takiya.”
“Yeah?”
“Could you get me another beer?”
Takiya looked at the bar, then her. “You sure you want one?”
Wouldn’t say it’s a want, but “Yeah.”
“If you say so.” He got up and walked towards the bartender.
Kobayashi put her head in her hands.
What the hell am I doing with myself?
She thought about calling Tohru, telling her she might be late, but she
reconsidered once the next beer came by.
***** You Thought You Knew *****
                             You Thought You Knew
This was going to be a difficult meeting. For one thing, she was going to be
dealing with her. Even if Lucoa was there to make sure things were calm, she
would still have to restrain her temper. Letting it loose wouldn’t work for
something like this. It never did.
For another, the subject material itself would be hard to discuss. She hadn’t
invited Fafnir, partially because she found it unlikely that he would be drag
himself away from his computer for something like this, and partially because
she guessed that that bastard coworker of Miss Kobayashi’s had told him
already.
She was still angry at Miss Kobayashi for not telling her she was going to be
late that night, and that she came home drunker than she had ever seen her
before. But she understood why Miss Kobayashi would be doing something like
this, so she let it be, as long as Kanna didn’t see it.
“Good afternoon, Tohru.”
She looked up. “Hey there, Lucoa-san.” The former goddess sat at the chair to
the right of her. She had gotten herself a table at a café whose owner was the
uncle of one of the shop owners that she knew. The man had made sure that it
was secluded, that made it hard for people to overhear their conversation.
“I’m surprised you invited Elma here, considering your… relationship.”
“I felt it was necessary, as much as I did not want her to come. She should
know.”
“Know what?”
Tohru tapped her finger on the table. “You’ll find out. In a moment.”
The two of them sat there in silence, with the only interruption being Lucoa
getting something to drink. She was thinking about her words, something that
she typically didn’t think about beforehand. She was always the kind to do what
she pleased and not care for the consequences. But, in this world, those
consequences were much more important than she ever thought. She no longer had
herself to think about; she had Kanna and Miss Kobayashi. I can’t put in them
in harm’s way.
“Ah, you’re here, Elma.”
“Yes.” The harmony dragon sat down across from Tohru, looking like she just
left work.
Just because she gets to work with Miss Kobayashi doesn’t make her any better…
No, temper those feelings, don’t let them control you…
“So, why did you invite me, Tohru? I know it’s not to fight since we are in
public, and you wouldn’t be that stupid to start something here.”
Tohru tapped her finger on the table, then stopped. She remembered the
bruising, the blood, the pain she could see on the girl’s face.
“Someone attacked Kanna. They raped her.”
Both Lucoa’s and Elma’s faces paled. Tohru just stared straight ahead, not
trying to think about her anger, the rage that made her want to kill
everysinglethinginthis
“Tohru.” She felt Lucoa’s hand on top of hers. “It’s OK.”
She breathed, in and out. “I know. It’s just… so hard to look at Kanna-chan and
not see like she was that night…” She looked like one of them… no, they’re
dead, Kanna’s alive…
“Do they know who did it?”
“Yeah, one of her teachers.” Who, if I ever see him, will be
cryingformercyasIplacehissoulthroughthemosthorrifictorment
“Tohru.” She looked over at Lucoa, whose eyes were open and staring at her. She
always found herself transfixed by the designs in them, and it helped her to
calm down. “It’s not worth it, whatever you are thinking. This world has its
own rules, and we have to respect it, no matter what our hearts want.”
“I know.” But yet, I don’t care. She looked over at Elma, who… well, she had
never seen that look on her face before. Her eyes were unfocused, and her
breathing seemed ragged.
“Elma, you alright?”
Elma blinked a few times and seemed to be back in reality. “Yea-Yeah, I’m just…
I’m just imagining what that must have been like for her… How is she?”
“She seems to be doing OK, although she doesn’t talk to us much.” Tohru
shrugged. “She’s a dragon, though. She’ll be fine.”
Lucoa smiled. “I hope so.”
Tohru looked over at Lucoa, then at Elma. The water dragon just looked at Tohru
for a moment, before taking a sip from her drink.
Tohru only paid a little attention to the fact that Elma’s cup was shaking
slightly.
*
She wanted to get the aftertaste out of her mouth so bad. She thought she was
going to throw up again, but her stomach didn’t have anything left, so she just
dry heaved.
She stood up on shaky legs and went to the sink, cleaning her face and rinsing
her mouth out.
blood blood everywhere and some of it was hers and some of it was theirs and it
smelled like death they killed him they killed me they’re going to kill me
No! They’re not there anymore. They can’t hurt you. Elma walked out of her
bathroom and sat down on her couch. She hugged the pillow she had there and
breathed slowly.
In… out… in… out…
…for this will tame the soul and ride the evil impulse out of them…
She growled into her pillow, yelling until her throat was sore. It was
partially for her, but it was also for Kanna. She hadn’t known the girl that
long, but she seemed so sweet that she couldn’t imagine someone doing something
like that to that girl.
…for even children lack that innocence of which the ignorant claim them to
have…
As she was about to make herself some tea to calm down, she heard a noise from
her bedroom.
Who is that? Slowly, she walked towards her bedroom and opened the door.
The window was broken, and someone was sitting on the bed. They were covered in
a black cloak, with a mess of pink hair flowing from their head and horns
coming out of it. They looked behind, showing their red eyes and slit pupils.
Their hands were misshapen, or would have been in human standards, as they
ended in claws.
She’d seen this person before, in the other world. But from where, she wasn’t
sure.
“Who are you?”
The person blinked before turning the rest of their body around. Elma could
tell it was a woman from the way that the cloak curved around her chest and her
panties.
“Elma-san… it’s been a while…” The girl’s voice was quiet and shaky, like her
words were being spoken from miles away. Then, she knew.
“Iruru…” She walked towards the bed. “What are you doing here?”
“I… I needed to get away… from…” She curled up on the bed and rested her head
on her knees. She didn’t seem to be continuing her sentence as she started
crying.
Elma sat next to Iruru and held her close. She had seen the girl a few times
before when she was younger, but she had lost touch with her over the
centuries.
Something happened to her… And I think I know what…
“Do you need a place to stay?”
Iruru nodded, resting her head on Elma’s chest.
“OK. You can stay here, as long as you need.”
“OK.” Iruru looked up. “Do you have a bath?”
“Yeah. Follow me.” As she got the girl up, she was wondering what she was doing
right now. Her job barely gave her enough money to support herself, and now she
was taking on someone else.
Money doesn’t matter now, I can do without a few things. I need to be here for
her right now.
Like I needed…
*
“Hey, Shouta-kun?”
“What is it?” Lucoa was currently laying on Shouta’s bed, while he was at his
desk, doing his homework.
She was still thinking about what she had learned that day, about what had
happened to Kanna. It wasn’t something that shocked her deeply; when you were
alive for as long as she had been, the stories all started to blend together
after a while. But this one bothered her, not so much because of what had
happened, but to who it happened.
She hadn’t known Kanna that well (she didn’t spend much time interacting with
the Kamui clan), so she couldn’t claim any deep relationship with her, but she
had seen in Kanna a strength and empathy that would be critical to have in the
future. This event could have drastic problems, both on the micro and macro
scale. For Kanna as an individual, this could potentially cause her to become
antagonistic towards humans, making her vengeful towards them if she ever came
back to their world. On a bigger scale, if her family ever found out about what
happened…
This world would burn, and there would be no way of bringing it back. The cycle
would come to an end.
“You were going to say something.”
Lucoa shook her head. “Oh, right.” She sat up, feeling her breasts bounce.
Shouta looked away somewhat as his face blushed.
“Shouta-kun, nobody’s ever done anything to you that you felt was wrong,
right?”
Shouta stared at her, eyes wide. “Wh-What do you mean by that?”
“What I mean, has anyone have touched you any place you didn’t like, or done
anything to you that you didn’t want done?”
“N-No! Why…” He looked away, not finishing his question.
“Because, I just don’t want anything bad to happen to you.” There was another
reason that Kanna’s situation had bothered her. She imagined Shouta looking
like that, battered and violated, and it scared her. “You do know, if anything
happens, you can tell me or your parents, OK?”
“O-OK.” He looked back at his homework, but then looked back at her. “Lucoa-
san?”
“Yes, Shouta-kun?”
“Sometimes… Sometimes when you’re around me, the things you do… they make me
feel… uncomfortable.”
Lucoa looked down. “Oh.”
“I-I still like you, it’s just-”
“No, I understand.” She walked out of the room and went into the guest bedroom
that Shouta’s parents had given her. She laid down on the bed.
I just want to be there for him… I want to help him…
But I don’t know if I’m the person he needs right now… Especially with my body
being the way it is…
She looked at herself. She never really thought of herself as too different.
Sure, she was bustier and curvier than every single dragon she’d ever met, but
considering all of them were stacked, it never struck her as something unusual.
But this world, this world made her feel weird. Made her body feel
unattractive, something to be stared at as something odd. And when she was
around Shouta, it seemed to be ten times worse.
What do I do now? WhatcanI do?
…
Why am I even here? I, a failed goddess?
It felt like forever that she laid there, staring at the ceiling, wondering.
***** It'll Never Go Away *****
                              It’ll Never Go Away
She was in a dark place, where only her sense of touch was keeping grounded.
She tried to walk around, but every time she did, she fell flat on her face,
only for her to get up and do it all over again.
I have to get out… I have to find the way out…
She could hear something now, steps behind her. She tried to run, but someone
grabbed her leg and started to drag her.
I have to get away… She turned her hands into claws and thrust them into the
ground, but her strength meant nothing as they made marks in the ground.
“You could have stopped me.” Mister Sunohara stood in front of her. “You could
have, but you didn’t.” He placed his foot down on her chest. It was so hard for
her to breathe. “You were a weak bitch then, and you always be. You let
yourself care too much. You could have killed him. Instead, you let him fuck
you.”
She looked up again. Now, it was her father, his purple eyes containing nothing
but malice. This wasn't like him, not at all.
“F-Father, please…”
“I have no weak children.” He moved his foot over her neck and broke it with
one movement.
She opened her eyes, breathing heavily. She was the only one in her bed. The
sheets around her were damp with her sweat.
She had been away from school for 3 days. Riko had come by every day to bring
her homework, and to just be there for her. But she still felt cooped up, felt
like the walls were closing in, slowly, inch by inch.
She got out of bed and landed on the ground. Slowly, her legs let her move. She
walked out to the kitchen.
“I’m going back.” Kobayashi, who was eating breakfast slowly and rubbing her
head, looked down at her.
“What do you mean?” Her voice sounded slow, like she was sick or something.
“I’m going back to school today.”
Kobayashi’s eyes widened as she went over to Kanna. “Are you sure, Kanna-chan?
I mean, it’s only been a few days, and you haven’t really done much, and you
can- no, you should take as much time as you need, and you should stay here
and-”
“Kobayashi.” She said that in the most direct voice she could muster. “I’m
grateful for you and Lady Tohru taking care of me, but I have to go back. I… I
can’t stay in here, feeling like… like I’ll die if I stay.” She wasn’t sure
where these words were coming form; she was partially scared of them, but she
felt that she must say them if she were to continue the life that she wanted.
Kobayashi looked down at the floor, then looked at Kanna. “If that’s what you
want, then… I guess that’s what it will be…”
Kanna nodded, then went back to her bedroom to get dressed. She was confused
about Kobayashi’s behavior. She seemed weird around her, like she wanted to
take care of her, but she scared her sometimes with how much she wanted to
protect her. She reminded her of Uncle Jura.
“Humans are not meant to be trusted. They only wish to harm you and will ravage
you if you let them.”
I know that’s wrong, but at the same time… I did… Why did I? Nothing good would
come from thinking about these things, so she just got ready for school.
As she was about to leave, Tohru kneeled next to her.
“Hey, Kanna, if you want to, I could come by your school and watch over you.”
“Thank you, Lady Tohru, but I’ll be fine.”
“Yeah, but… what if something happens again, and you freeze?” Her face looked
odd, like she was looking past her.
“It won’t. I have my friends.” Saikawa… she’d protect me…
“Well, they didn’t protect you last time.”
Kanna loved Tohru. She saw her as a big sister who would always be there for
her. But, at that moment, she wanted nothing to do with her.
“I’ll be back home after school, Tohru.”
As she went down the stairs, she stopped for a moment. She thought she heard
someone say something, and then a door closing. She continued walking. She had
to get to school, after all.
*
The autumn air sent a chill down her spine as she entered school. It had been
oddly cold the past few days, in more ways than one. Every day, she waited
patiently at the shoe lockers until the last minute, risking being marked late,
but every day that locker remained unopen.
Riko had visited Kanna-san every day since… that moment, but it still wasn’t
the same. She was feeling bad for Kanna-san, worrying that she’d never come
back, that she’d lose her only friend.
She heard a locker close to hers opening, and out of instinct, she looked over
to see who it was. Her breath stopped and her legs quivered.
“K-Kanna-san!”
The girl looked over at Riko, his eyes poring over every part of her, or at
least, that’s what it felt like.
“Saikawa.”
“Kanna-san, y-you’re back.”
“Yes.” She closed the locker. “Thank you for coming by.”
“A-Ah, you’re w-welcome…” She wasn’t sure what to say, but she felt like she
should say something. “H-How are you feeling?”
Kanna-san shrugged. “Okay. Got tired of being inside all day. I felt like I
needed to go back here.”
“O-Oh…” She wasn’t fully understanding what the girl was saying, but she got
the basic idea. “I was wondering, would you like to come over to my house the
day after tomorrow?”
Kanna-san shook her head. “I can’t. I have a therapist appointment.”
“Oh.” She didn’t know exactly what that was, but if there was an appointment
for it, then it must be serious. “Well, then, another time.”
“Saikawa.” Kanna-san looked over at her, and then pulled her in for a hug. Her
whole body felt warm and soft, like she could melt away. She limped in Kanna-
san’s embrace. “Thank you, for being there.”
“O-Of course!” She hugged her back. “I’ll always be there for you. Always…”
Kanna-san let her go, but Riko held onto her for just long enough to kiss her.
They had kissed several times in the past few days, but Kanna-san was always
the one who went first. She wanted to know what it felt to take the first step.
She felt an electricity run through her body, from her hair to her toes. She
could feel Kanna-san return the kiss before they had to unfortunately separate.
Kanna-san’s blush almost made her “bohe”, but she was able to contain it.
“Come on, Kanna-san, let’s get to class. Everyone’s been missing you.” An odd
look passed over Kanna-san’s face before she took her hand and walked with her.
As soon as the door opened to the class, everyone crowded around the two of
them, asking questions to Kanna-san and wondering what happened to her. She
could see Kanna-san starting to get distressed, so she held her close to her
body.
“Leave her be! She- she just got over the flu, and she’s still weak.” She got
her away from the crowd and to her desk. “Sorry about that, Kanna-san. You OK?”
Kanna-san nodded her head. “Thank you.”
“Of course.” As she got to her own desk, she noticed a group of girls near the
front of the room. They were staring at Kanna-san, glaring almost.
She didn’t care about them much, though. Her thoughts were only of Kanna-san
and the kiss they had just minutes earlier.
*
She wasn’t sure what was making her hangover worse: the sounds of people
working around her, or her existing. She normally took good care of how much
alcohol she had in a night, but for the past few days, she hadn’t cared as
much. She didn’t want to think any more, she didn’t want to see those images
anymore, of Kanna writhing on her bed…
Her cell phone was ringing. Looking at it, she saw that it was Hina. The
detective had called her once before, to tell her that they arrested the
teacher who… hurt Kanna, but she hadn’t heard anything since.
She went into a side room in the office to take the call; no one else besides
Takiya had known, and she wanted to keep it that way.
“Hey there, Kobayashi. How are you feeling today?”
“Wishing I didn’t drink so much last night, but otherwise, fine.”
“Yeah, I can understand the feeling. I’m calling to tell you that Sunohara’s
going to jail.”
“T-That quickly? But, they haven’t even filed a court date.”
“No need. He confessed to not only raping your cousin, but 5 other girls at the
school.”
She felt herself adrift for a moment. There were others… It was probably the
darkness, but she thought she saw them for a moment, looking up at her with
blood on their skirts.
“…ashi? You there?”
“Oh, yes, sorry. You said there were 5 other girls?”
“Yes. Each of them was taken to the equipment room, and were raped there. We
were able to confirm it with the other families, although, as it turns out,
none of them knew anything beforehand.”
“Those girls… they didn’t say anything?”
“Not as far as we know. Anyway, we agreed on a plea deal; he plead guilty to 6
counts of rape in the third degree, each one of which will get him 5 years.”
“So, that’s… 30 years?”
“Yeah.”
“But… for what he did, that’s seems so…”
“Low? Yeah, I agree, but that’s the way the law is. You can get more for murder
than for fucking some 8-year-old. But at least he’s in jail.”
“Yeah…” But it still doesn’t feel right…
“Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that. I gotta go; I’m helping a colleague
with a case. You guys take care of yourself, alright? Call me if you need
anything.”
“Yeah… Thanks.”
“Of course. Bye.” The line went dead. Kobayashi sat down on the ground, her
legs curling up to her.
She wanted to cry, but her body wasn’t agreeing with her. Her vision was
getting all wobbly, and she could smell the bile in her throat.
This hadn’t helped her hangover at all.
*
The ending bell had rung, and Kanna was getting her things into her bag when
one of the girls in her class came by her desk.
“Hey, Kanna-san, there’s something cool we found in the music room. We wanted
to know if you wanted to see it.”
Kanna looked at the girl, then looked over at Saikawa. “OK.” Before she went
with the girl, she went over to Saikawa. “If I’m not back in a few minutes,
find me.” With that, she left.
The hallways felt so weird, being empty and silent, excluding their two
footsteps. The multi-colored leaves fell outside, slowly drifting in the wind.
Eventually, she got to the music room. The girl closed the door behind her.
Kanna then noticed that there were other girls around her. They were also from
her class. They were glaring at her, like Father used to do.
“Why couldn’t you stay quiet, Kanna-san?” They started to corner her towards
the back. “We all did, but you didn’t.”
“I didn’t say anything. My guardian found me.” Why? What happened? Why are they
doing this?
“You could have hid it! We all did, we could have hidden it forever, nobody had
to know, but you had to open your damn mouth!”
Kanna had her back against the wall. He must have hurt them… She was trying to
find the words, but they were failing her. She had done the right thing, she
had, but she felt like she couldn’t convince them otherwise.
“Why did you say anything? Didn’t you see what happened to us? Didn’t you see
that we didn’t say anything? That we didn’t want to? That we just wanted to-”
“Kanna-san!” Saikawa had opened the door and got to Kanna, wrapping her into
her arms. “Why are you yelling at her?”
“Because she forced us to tell everyone! We didn’t want to!”
“But she didn’t hurt you! Mr. Sunohara did!”
All of the girls stepped back slightly. “But- But- If nobody noticed, then we…
we wouldn’t have to say anything.”
“But you didn’t do anything! He did! You should be angry at him, not yourself
or Kanna-san!”
They all froze. Kanna felt a deep warmth coming from Saikawa, like a fire had
surrounded her.
“I don’t care what she does or what happened, I- I won’t let you hurt the one I
love!” Saikawa’s tears were in her hair, but she didn’t care. She felt some
comfort from it.
The girls looked down slightly.
“We’re sorry, Kanna-san. It’s just…”
“He hurt us, but he was always nice afterwards, and we were scared of what our
parents would say.”
“None of them have said anything, and we… we think they hate us.”
“We’re really sorry, Kanna-san. Can you forgive us?”
Kanna looked down for a moment, then back up.
“Promise me something. Talk to your parents. Tell them what you feel. They
don’t hate you. They’re just… worried about what to say. They want to help you,
but they can’t if they don’t know what’s wrong.”
If they’re any better than my parents, they’ll help.
They nodded, then slowly left the room, but not before they gave a few glances
back. Kanna grabbed Saikawa tightly, and Saikawa held her back.
“Thank you, Saikawa.”
“Of course, Kanna-san. I’ll always be here.”
As Kanna looked over Saikawa’s shoulder, she thought she saw someone. A girl
with pink hair, slitted eyes, and horns. She was on the opposite side of the
hallway window. She was giving her a look of intensity, one that she had seen
before.
She blinked. The girl was gone.
She forgot her for the moment and let herself feel Saikawa’s warmth cover her
like a blanket.
***** Visage of You *****
                                 Visage of You
It seemed to be one of those days that wasn’t going to get good, no matter how
much coffee she drank. The headache was only intensifying, and the numbers on
the screen were making her nauseous. She already had to make one trip to the
bathroom that morning; she didn’t want to make two.
“Kobayashi?” She looked over. Her boss was next to her. “Could I speak with
you?”
Well, shit. “Of course, sir.” She got up slowly and walked into his office. At
least it was slightly dimmed, so that helped. Kind of.
“So,” her boss said, “I’m sure I’m not the only one who has noticed the recent
changes in your behavior, Miss Kobayashi.”
“Wh-What do you mean, sir?” She knew what he meant.
“I really like you, Kobayashi. You’re one of the best workers we have here.
You’re dedicated to your job, and you’re smarter than most of those assholes
who say a woman should be at home.” She liked that about her boss; he wasn’t
the kind who suffered fools gladly. “Which is why it hurts when I see you
looking like you just made a walk of shame from a distillery.”
Kobayashi looked down. She felt a deep shame emanate from inside her. She had
been going to the bar every night; drinking made it harder for her to think,
and she did not want to think much these days.
“You’re not the kind of person who would randomly stop taking of themselves,
Kobayashi. Is something the matter at home or with your personal life?”
She looked up. For a moment, she thought she saw her father. Dad… He wouldn’t
judge me, would he?
“Yeah… Yeah, there is.” Suddenly, she felt herself begin to cry. She didn’t
want to, but she felt like she had to let it out.
Her boss passed a box of tissues to her, and she took it. “T-Thanks.” She wiped
the tears from her face the best she could. “You- You know my cousin, the- the
girl, the one I’ve been taking care of?”
“Yes… Did something happen to her?”
“Yeah… She, um, she was- raped at her school by, um… one of, uh, her teachers.”
Kobayashi looked up. “And, it’s… it’s just been hard, having to, uh, deal with
that.”
Her boss only nodded. “I’m sorry to hear that.” There was an uncomfortable
amount of silence for what seemed like hours.
“You know, there is a project that a client of ours asked us to perform
recently. In essence, they wish for us to go through their payroll and see if
people are in the place that is best for them. The thing is, this company is
quite big and would slow down our work for a while, potentially frustrating our
other clients. However, if one person were able to work in a place where they
could spend all their time on it, it shouldn’t take too long.”
She wasn’t sure if the hangover was making her feel confused or if it was just
reality. “What… What do you mean by that, sir?”
“I am asking you, Miss Kobayashi, to work on this project. At home. Don’t
worry, you’ll be paid your normal salary, and you’ll even receive a nice bonus
at the end of it.”
OK, I’m even more confused. “W-What’s the deadline, sir?”
For the first time this whole conversation, her boss smiled. “There is no
deadline. You can take as long as you need to complete this. The client
wouldn’t be that surprised if it took you a while.”
It finally caught up to her. “Sir, are- are you asking me to go on vacation?”
“You could call it that, if you wanted to.”
Kobayashi thought about it. As much as she wanted to spend time at home, away
from the distractions of the world, she needed it. Because it stopped her from
looking at Kanna and seeing that mangled body. Because it stopped her from
wanting to yell at Tohru every time she opened her mouth. Because it stopped
her from thinking that she failed utterly.
No. I didn’t fail. I won’t. I can’t.
“I’ll… I’ll take on the project, sir.”
“Thank you, Miss Kobayashi. I wish you the best of luck on the project. Mrs.
Sawatari will give you all the materials you need.”
Kobayashi nodded and then left the office. She stopped by at her desk.
“Hey, Takiya.”
“Oh, hey, Kobayashi. What’s up?”
“I just want to tell you I’m going to working at home for the next few weeks.
The boss gave me a big project.”
“Ah, I see. Well, I hope it goes well for you.”
“Yeah, me too. See ya.” With a wave, she left.
Damn it! I still have my hangover. That didn’t fix anything.
Or maybe it did, but she wasn’t able to describe how. Shit.
*
“Hello, Kanna. How are you doing today?”
The dragon blinked. “OK.”
“That’s good, Kanna.”
She was in the office of the therapist that Dr. Senjou had recommended. From
Kobayashi’s description, a therapist seemed to help people who were hurting on
the inside, but not in their body per se. It was more like their behaviors and
actions that this person treated.
This woman, Dr. Kusakabe, was quite old, with the majority of her hair having
gone gray. She reminded her of the elders from her world, the ones who even
people like her father would have asked for advice before attempting something.
There was a strength in her, but also a kindness.
“So, Kanna, could you describe to me your living situation?”
… “I like living with Kobayashi and Lady Tohru. They’re nice.”
“Now, Miss Kobayashi, she is your cousin, correct?”
“Yes, my second.” Kobayashi drilled that into her to make sure she got that
correct.
“And you’re originally from the islands close to Russia, correct?”
“Yes.” She wasn’t exactly what a Russia is, but that was what Kobayashi had
told her.
“What is your birth family like?”
This was going to be the hard part, considering that she had to be truthful,
but not entirely true. “My father works for the military. My mother takes care
of me and my siblings.”
“How many siblings do you have?”
“Six.”
“And where do you fit into the birth order?”
“I’m the youngest.”
“I see.” She had been making notes throughout their conversation; she seemed to
be able to write without even looking at the page. “How would you describe your
relationship with your family?”
“My brothers and sisters, they were always there for me. They liked to play
with me and be there if I needed help. My mother… I find it hard to talk about
her sometimes.”
“Why is that?”
“Because… what I feel for her is hard to say. I always knew that I was safe
with her, that she loved me, and would always love me. She’s… She’s one of the
most important people to me.”
“And your father?”
Kanna paused for a moment; she wanted to get the words right. “My father loves
me, but… in a different way than my mother."
"How so?"
"My father... he's away a lot for work, so I don't get to see him that much,
but when he came back home, he would always have gifts from overseas and
stories to tell. If I did something wrong, he would rebuke me, but he was never
harsh about it." Except this last time, but that... that was different. "If my
mother was my protector, then my father was my mentor, the one who guides me."
"I see." The doctor continued to write notes. “Well, what about your family
here? Do you get along with your cousin?”
Kanna nodded. “Yes, quite well.”
“And this ‘Lady’ Tohru? Are you close with her?”
Kanna paused. “Y.e.s. She… she’s a close family friend, but lately I feel
myself growing… away from her.”
“Why do you think that is?”
“She’s said things about… what happened that I didn’t agree with.”
“Are you willing to talk about that?”
She smelled it clearly, that awful smell of whatever it was that came out of
him.
“Not… not right now.”
“OK, then. Do you have any friends at school?”
Kanna affirmed. “I have a lot.”
“Any one in particular?”
“Saikawa.”
“What makes this person more special than other people?”
“She wants to be there for me. When I was at home, she came every single day
and stayed longer than she had to. She wanted to take care of me, to make sure
that I was alright. But she knew when to leave me alone, and she respected
that.
“When I went back to school, she… she kissed me. That was the first time she
had gone first. It felt… it felt good when she did that. I felt… safe, secure.
It felt like nobody could hurt me at that moment.”
“Would you say that you like Saikawa, Kanna?”
…
“I… I think so.”
*
The wind was heavy tonight. She imagined people on the streets dealing with the
cold, cutting into their skin.
She was thinking about Kanna-san, as she had more and more often. It seemed
like when she tried to think about something else, her thoughts went back to
Kanna-san. To the times that they held each other and kissed. Her mind was
constantly racing, but centered on one central idea: that she wasn’t good
enough for Kanna-san.
Kanna-san is perfect, and kind, and gentle, and amazing, and I’m nothing like
that… This will come to an end eventually… And I’ll be left by myself…
This wouldn’t end well. She needed to talk to someone. She got out of her
bedroom and walked into the living room. Her father was sitting on the couch,
reading a book.
“Hey, Dad?”
He put down his book and gave her a smile. “Hey, Riko. What’s the matter?”
She sat down next to him. She could trust her father; he may seem scary to some
people at first glance, but the fact that her mother always called him her
“giant teddy bear” was probably a better indication of his true character. He
was warm and gentle and always there to help. Something she needed right now.
“Do you think it’s possible to help someone all that you can… and still feel
like you’re not doing enough?”
“Is this about Kanna?”
She nodded. “Yeah.” Her parents knew about the situation; that was probably why
they allowed her to stay as long as she did at Kanna-san’s home.
“What have you been doing to help her?”
“I’ve been there for her. I’ve held her when she cries. I’m there if she needs
to talk to someone. But, I still don’t feel like I’m helping her, that I’m
just… there.”
“How does Kanna feel when you’re there?”
“She looks happy.” She put her chin on her knees and smiled. “She likes that
I’m there for her, even if she just needs someone there. She just… brightens
up.”
“Well, I think you’re doing everything that you can. I don’t know if she needs
someone who can do everything, but I think that she needs someone who is there
for here. That’s all you can do sometimes.”
She nodded. She still felt like she wasn’t doing well, but what her father said
made sense.
“Hey, Dad.”
“Yeah?”
“Why… Why did he hurt Kanna-san?”
He sighed. He moved his arm over her shoulders and held her close. She hugged
him back.
“Some people… they’re just so damaged that they can’t recognize when they’re
hurting other people, even children. I can’t really explain beyond that.”
“It’s OK.”
“Riko.” He had her look at him. His eyes seemed to be staring into her. “Your
mother and I do everything to make sure you and your sister are safe. But,
sometimes bad things happen. I just want you to know that, if something
happens, you can tell either one of us. We won’t be angry.”
She nodded, then leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. “Thanks, Dad.”
“Anytime, my little flower.”
She smiled, then went to leave the room. But, a question suddenly formed in her
mind.
“Hey, Dad? The way I told I felt earlier… do you ever feel that way with Mom?”
He thought for a moment. “Yes, when she was carrying you and your sister,
especially later on. She was always aching, and I always felt like that there
was more that I could do for her. Until she told me that the best thing I did
for me was to hold her in our bed, talking to you and Sae softly. She knew in
those moments that she had someone to trust, to always be there for her… Why do
you ask?”
She shrugged. “Just wondering.”
As she went back to her bed, Riko wondered if Kanna-san would ever hold her in
their bed as their child grew inside her.
I’m giving her what she needs… As for what I need, that comes later. Right now,
she needs me, and I’ll be there.
Always, like the cold in the winter.
*
She was glad she was finally back inside. The cold was a bitch to handle,
especially with the wind that felt like a gale. She felt a contentment in being
back inside.
“I’m back, Iruru.”
She heard what sounded like a grunt in response. Iruru had stayed in her
apartment ever since she came here. She had helped with chores and such, which
was nice, but she had provided little in terms of what she wanted to do in this
world. It seemed more and more clear to Elma that Iruru didn’t so much want to
be in this world as not be in the other world.
Elma flopped onto her bed, feeling the weight of the world melt away from her.
She loved working where she did, but at the same time, it was nice to let
herself be free, feeling her tail swish around.
This world is so interesting… So many choices to make, so many things to see…
But there’s still danger here, I mean, Kanna was-
No, don’t think about that, you’ll think about those things, I don’t want to,
go away, just go away, I can smell it, he’s coming, he’s going to be inside me,
and then he’ll
She felt two strong claws pin her arms to the bed. She opened her eyes. Iruru
was on top of her, staring at her with hard silted eyes.
“You were thinking about bad things. I can change that.” In only a few motions,
Iruru took off her shirt and placed Elma’s hands on her breasts.
Oh! They’re so big and soft! Unconscious of herself, she started to squeeze,
buckling her hips as she moaned. She felt sharp hands being placing on her
breasts.
“Mmm, yes, don’~t stop!”
“OK then.” Iruru kissed Elma and slipped her tongue inside her mouth, to the
point that she found it hard to breathe.
So hard… to think… feels weird… butso good… can’t remember… what… I… was…
She was so consumed by her oxygen-deprived ecstasy that she didn’t notice the
gashes on her sides or the barbs scratching the inside of her cunt.
***** A Far-Away Utopia *****
                               A Far-Away Utopia
It was a quick realization for both Lucoa and the Magatsuchi family that having
the ex-goddess around when shopping could result in some substantive discounts
thanks to her… appearance. Such was the case on this autumn day.
“I was quite surprised by how enamored that assistant was with me.” Lucoa
tittered slightly. “I had no idea she leaned that way.”
“Well, all the better for us, though I still don’t feel right about this kind
of thing.” Mrs. Magatsuchi was quite the elegant woman, with her purple hair
neatly tied into a bun and her behavior and pose refined. From what she had
heard, she had come from one of the more noble mage families that had come to
this world after the conflict.
“I agree somewhat, but I can’t deny that having a body like mine has its
benefits.” And its drawbacks.
Miss Magatsuchi had to get something from a craft store, but Lucoa decided to
stay outside and get some of the cool autumn air. She also needed some time to
think about what she wanted to do. As much as she liked being with the
Magatsuchis, she felt stagnant. She felt a sense of being unable to figure out
what she wanted for herself in the future. Did she want to wander this world,
seeing what it was like? Did she want to be with Shouta, helping him throughout
his life? Or would she head back home, trying to get people to listen to her
and find ways to improve their lives?
I find it somewhat hard to believe that they would do such a thing.
She glanced to the side. She had to blink her eyes because she didn’t believe
what she was seeing.
There was a man with shortly-cut brown hair, Japanese from the looks of it. He
was talking to a couple, a man and a woman. The man had a multi-colored braid,
red, yellow, and green; he was wearing an outfit that resembled what she had
seen in artbooks of art from what this world called “The Enlightenment.” The
woman had black hair with red at the ends, wearing a tight black dress accented
with geometric designs that looked like stars.
Lucoa started walking towards them. “You didn’t tell me you were coming here,
Mican.”
The man looked at her before smiling slightly. “Neither did you, Lucoa-nee.”
She hadn’t seen her brother, Mictlantecuhtli, in a long time. He was in the
middle of their group and had been a wanderer, a flaneur of sorts. He liked to
document the world in painting and other forms of art, which he often displayed
in the home that he lived in with his wife, Mictecacihuatl, and their son,
Lacandon.
“Micte, what’s the matter?”
Micte looked up, her normally warm eyes having turned cold, the black in the
iris going on for an eternity. “It’s Lacandon. He’s gone missing.”
“What do you mean ‘missing’?”
“He hadn’t heard from him in a while, so we asked his friends. They said he had
left his house months ago and hadn’t talked to them or communicated in anyway.
A few days ago, we heard that he might be here, so we’re staying with friends.
We were asking Dr. Yamato if he could help.”
Lucoa looked over at the man who had been operating on the outskirts of this
conversation. He looked clean-cut, the kind of man who was respectful to
everyone he met, considering the fact that he appeared to be trying so hard not
to let his eyes go further down her neck.
“It’s nice to meet you. I’m Dr. Yamato Senjou.” He stuck his hand, of which she
shook.
“Lucoa, Mican’s sister. It’s nice to meet you too.”
Dr. Yamato looked over to the couple. “Like I said, I’ll tell you if he comes
into my hospital, and I’ll ask a friend of mine to look into it. I hope you
find him.” He walked off, although not before getting a side glance at Lucoa.
“Friend of yours?”
“We met back when he was in college and I was visiting this world for
materials. We’ve interacted over the years.” Mican looked at Lucoa. “So, this
is where you’ve been.”
“Oh? And what do you mean by that?”
“Well, I would have thought you would have lived in the city, living it up.”
“That could have been a possibility, but there are friends of mine living
here.”
“Like who?”
“Tohru, for one. Kanna Kamui, for another.”
Mican raised an eyebrow. “They’re both here?”
“Yes, as are Elma and Fafnir. It seems like, once Tohru got here, this place
has become a hotbed for draconic activity.”
“You know, I was just thinking that Tohru hadn’t seen Lacandon in a while, and
it… would… be… nice…” Mican looked over at his wife, who looked more dead than
before. Lucoa noticed that some of the plants nearby were wilting, so she took
evasive action. She grabbed Micte and held her in a tight hug.
“We’ll find him. I know we’ll find him, so don’t worry.” She could hear Micte
sob a little.
“I- I know. It’s just… I’m worried about him being in this world.”
“What do you mean?”
“I can feel it, how wrong this world is. It’s too fast, too many people focused
on too many things that don’t mean anything. I can feel the ripples, all the
bad things that have happened because nobody paid attention. Nobody cares about
the effects, they only care about the now.” Micte panted in exhaustion. As a
goddess of death, she always had a keen sense of how the world is, but during
times of strife and chaos, she could become somewhat unstable.
“I agree. It can feel odd at times, but I think it’ll be alright.” Maybe.
“Come on, Micte. Let’s head back home.” Micte walked over to her husband, who
took her hand. “I’m sure you’ll know how to find us, Lucoa.”
“Yeah.” Before they left, Lucoa placed her hand on Micte’s shoulder. “We’ll
find him. I know we will.” Micte nodded slightly, not fully believing, before
she walked off with Mican.
“Friends of yours?” Miss Magatsuchi had finishing the shopping she needed done.
“Family. They’re looking for my nephew.”
“Ah. Well, I hope you find him.”
“Yeah.” Lucoa looked around.
Why am I starting to be worried as well?
Maybe Micte’s right.
*
Elma could barely look at herself in the toilet stall, but she knew she had to
just to make sure nothing had gotten worse. She took out the small mirror that
she had borrowed from a coworker and looked at the area between her legs.
It hadn’t gotten any worse, but it still looked awful. There was dried blood
all over her labia and stuck in her pubic hair. At that moment, a fresh trickle
of blood was going down her leg and she had to wipe it off with toilet paper.
If she opened her folds, she would be able to see and feel the dozens of
scratches and wounds that were constantly making her ache. The worst pain was
coming from her urethra; it had gotten injured last night and it made her want
to scream in pain every time she urinated.
Slowly, she got dressed and went over to the mirror to make sure none of her
tear stains were noticeable. She hated the way she acted last night; she felt
tricked and deceived. She felt like the way she did back then, when she wanted
to die every time the footsteps stopped by her. She thought the memories would
stop, but they didn’t.
As she got back out to the workstations, she noticed a particular absence.
Kobayashi hadn’t shown up for work today.
Where’d she go? Maybe she was used for the Ritual of Balance- No, no, no!
You’re not there anymore. You’re here, you’re safe, you’ll be OK.
“Hey, Elma-san.” Takiya was behind her.
“Oh, hey. Do you know where Kobayashi is?”
“Ah. She’s going to be on vacation for a while. She has to take care of a
really important task.”
Vacation? … Oh, yes, I recall what that means. “But, if she’s on vacation, then
why is she still working?”
“Well, from what I could infer, it wasn’t so much a vacation as a way for her
to work at home. Where she could be close to Kanna-chan.”
Oh. That made sense the more she thought about. Kanna would need some sort of
support in the time to come. She knew she did. Everyone like them needed that.
“We… We should visit Kobayashi sometime soon.”
“Yeah, we should. But I think we should give her some time first.”
… “Yeah.” As Elma went to her workspace, she couldn’t stop thinking about
Kobayashi and Kanna.
As much as I want to believe that having someone close will happen, it’s also
possible that that kind of isolation could make things worse. Being so close to
someone all the time could make them realize things about the other they didn’t
want to know.
They’ll need others outside of themselves. Everyone needs that.
*
As per usual, Fafnir had been dead quiet for the majority of the night. The
only times he had spoken were when he needed some kind of assistance or passing
information along to Takiya. Their arrangement had stayed the same ever since
Fafnir started living her, but tonight needed to be different. It had to be.
“Hey, Faf-kun. Can I ask you something about your world?”
There were a few moments of silence. “Go ahead.”
“If your people found out that one of your own had raped somebody, what would
be the punishment?”
There was another period of silence, but this one felt painful. It felt like he
said the wrong thing, until Fafnir spoke.
“If they raped a human, we wouldn’t care. If they raped a dragon, we would
exile them, or execute them if they had raped many people. Typically, a dragon
trying to rape another dragon would result in the attacker’s death through
self-defense, but there have many instances of what your world calls ‘coercive
rape’. More often, a dragon is raped through speech and threats rather than
physical violence.”
Takiya found it hard to speak for a while. “I see.” The silence stayed between
them for what seemed like an eternity until Takiya spoke up again. “Faf-kun,
what is your ideal mate?”
… “What do you mean, Takiya?”
“The kind of person you could see yourself with. What kind of traits you like.
That sort of thing.”
Fafnir stayed quiet. Then he logged out of his game and turned around to face
Takiya. Takiya felt it polite to do the same.
“Takiya, I will tell this only on the threat of pain if you tell anyone else.”
Takiya had always taken Fafnir’s threats lightly, but this one felt like it had
real weight, so he just nodded.
“My last partner… his name was Abel. He was a quiet man, the kind who just
wanted to live a peaceful life. We were together for centuries, living near a
forest that held my treasures. He was the greatest, though.”
“What did he look like?”
Fafnir stared at Takiya directly for a moment before looking off to the side.
“Pale of skin. Dark of hair. Grey of eyes. A cloud dragon, the kind who smiled
a rainy day, the kind who loved when the snow flew down gently. He was my
everything. He was the one thing I never wanted to let go.
“One day, I came back home after I had been gone for a while, only to find him
gone. Nothing of his was left, only a note was left. ‘We can never be more,’ it
said.
“I tell you this, Makoto, only to say that I do not wish to feel that pain ever
again. As such, I am not interested in a relationship, especially with a mortal
man who will die in what is just a fleeting moment for me.” With that, Fafnir
went into the kitchen.
Takiya sat in his chair, looking down. Then he turned back to his game. He made
sure that Fafnir didn’t see his face.
*
Dinner had been unsurprisingly shitty that night. For the past few days, Tohru
had been putting in lackluster effort in preparing food. She had a reason why,
but she hadn’t said anything. Right now, she was trying to watch TV, waiting
for the inevitable explosion that she hoped would never happen.
She wanted to talk to Tohru, but every time she tried to start, they quickly
realized that negotiations would fall apart, so they just communicated tersely.
It was going to break at some point.
“So, Tohru… has Kanna-chan been doing at school?”
“I don’t know. She hasn’t talked to me about it.” She could hear Tohru angrily
cleaning dishes. Great, it’s always worse when she’s doing it by hand.
“Well, maybe she just doesn’t want to talk about it. It’s no problem if she
isn’t.”
“Yeah, well, she should. It’s not that much of a big deal.”
Kobayashi was starting to feel her blood boil. “Well, she’s dealing with a lot
of stuff, so I think she is.”
“Oh, come on, she’s a Kamui dragon. What happened to her is not the worst thing
that’s ever happened to her.”
Kobayashi instantly stood up and walked to Tohru, feet stomping on the floor.
“It happened, though. Whether or not she wants acknowledge it is up to her. In
fact, it would be better if she never thought about it again, if she just
forgot all of the pain and suffering and lived a normal, peaceful life, away
from all this bullshit! She doesn’t have to acknowledge it; she can just let it
fade away, like a bad dream.”
“That’s not how she should do it at all! She just needs to face it and get it
over with. Maybe tear that bastard limb from limb and drink his blood, just
like the old days!”
If they hadn’t been arguing, they might have noticed a small noise coming from
a bedroom. It almost sounded like a dog in the cold, whimpering.
***** That Day Never Ended *****
It had been cold the past few days, but now it had suddenly warmed up, much to
Tohru’s detriment. She may have been a cold-blooded creature, but she had her
limits, especially at a time like this. She scowled, bearing her teeth to some
unfortunate strangers.
I know Miss Kobayashi knows that she’s wrong about this! Kanna can’t just stay
cooped up for the rest of her life; she is a dragon, she is a creature proud
and noble! The fact that she let that happen to her shows that she shouldn’t be
coddled; it will just happen again!
And yet… no matter what we do, she’s still not getting better. She’s talking
and going to school, sure, but she still doesn’t seem right. But, it has to.
That’s what Father did.
“Oh, Tohru-san.” She turned behind to see who called to her. It was that doctor
from before, the one who treated Kanna. “How are you doing today?”
“… Good.” She didn’t want to talk to this human, this piece of filth.
“And how’s Kanna-chan?” That was it, the words that made her glare at him with
her full draconic fury, grabbing the front of his shirt.
“If you say her name again, I will rip your skin off and make your muscles
twitch with my claws!” The doctor blinked at her, seemingly uncaring about what
was happening.
“If you’re trying to scare me, Miss Tohru, I can assure it won’t work. You want
to scare me? Bring me a 6-year-old whose mother pulled out every single one of
his fingernails. Give me a 12-year-old girl who was raped and now has a baby in
her. Show me two parents who want their child to live through the night, but
know in their hearts that it would be better if the youth’s pain ended. That’s
what scares me.”
Tohru stared at him, shaking, before letting him go. “I- I apologize.” I’m a
dragon. I should handle myself better around humans.
“I understand. You’re worried about Kanna-chan, about how’s she handling her
assault.” Tohru could only nod in response to his words. “It’s a normal
response, to be worried about someone when they’ve been hurt, especially when
they’re close to you.”
“Yes, but… I just think she should get over it by now. I mean, she wasn’t that
injured, and she healed quickly, so why can’t she just move on?” The sounds
were starting to come back, the screaming, the burning buildings.
“I wouldn’t exactly say that she healed. I don’t think anybody can.” Yamato’s
face had taken a stoic mask, the only thing moving being his mouth. “I swore an
oath of healing, but I quickly came to realize that healing is an impossible
ideal. Wounds to the body and mind always leave behind scars and scabs, even
after they’ve healed. A skinned knee, a paper cut, a slight shock, they can
impact ourselves years, decades down the road. It may not always be a physical
impact, but injuries can change the way we think or act in our everyday lives.
I can never fully heal my patients, no doctor can, but what I think we can do
is get our patients to the best state that they can be at and make sure that
state remains stabilized for as long as possible.
“Kanna-chan will never heal fully; that’s why she needs you and Kobayashi-san
to help her from this time on.”
“I… I see.” She could barely hear him over the sounds, the wailing, the crying
out to God, the pleading for mercy. The images were starting to come with it,
the bones sticking out of children, the dazed survivors, burned to their
muscle, walking aimlessly. “It’s just… I want everything to be the way it was,
I want us to be a family, but… I don’t know how to help them. What should I
do?”
“I can’t say I can give the best advice for this kind of situation; I’m not a
therapist. All I can say is that, whenever I find myself facing a difficult
problem, I think of all the possible solutions and try out the one that seems
best, then go from there.” A ringing noise came from him, upon which he checked
his phone. “Ah, duty calls. I wish you the best of luck, Tohru-san.” With that,
he left. Tohru looked back at him.
The only solutions that I can think of would hurt them worse… damn it, why am I
so stupid? All I can do is destroy and harm… I killed all of those people, they
were just living their lives, but they were humans, so they had to die, right?
She found it hard to shake off the thoughts, and part of her was starting to
wonder if this was divine judgement.
*
“Miss Kobayashi.” She looked up from her work. “Elma is here. She says she has
some things for you.”
“Ah, thank you, Tohru.” As Kobayashi walked to the door, she thought about the
argument she had with Tohru. She was starting to feel a little bad about it. A
little, though; she still felt that Tohru was in the wrong here. Yet, she
understood where Tohru was coming from. In her world, being stuck on something
in the past could get you killed, so it was probably best to get over things
quickly.
But, we’re not here. At least, I hope we’re not.
“Ah, Kobayashi-san. Here, the manager told me to give these documents to you;
he said it would help speed things up.”
“Ah, thank you, Elma.” She looked at her coworker. She seemed a bit off, from
the slight movement of her feet and the way her eyes seemed to always be
unfocused.
“Umm, Kobayashi-san, could I talk to you… privately?”
“Uh, sure.” Kobayashi brought her back to her bedroom, all the while trying not
to notice Tohru’s piercing glare. “So, what do you wanna talk about?”
Elma looked around the room for a moment before sitting down next to Kobayashi.
“The truth is… I understand what Kanna-chan has been through.”
Her eyes widened. “Elma… did… did something-”
“Yes. When I was a child, my family was part of a group. I believe your world
refers to groups like these as cults.
“In the faith practiced by Harmony dragons, there are two major deities: one
that represents harmony, one that represents chaos. We believe that the harmony
deity is constantly trying to hold the chaos deity at bay, making sure that his
influence does not ruin the world.
“The group that I was in… they took that too far. The leaders of it said that
chaos was in all of us, but it could be tamed, reined in as children if
certain… measures were taken.”
Elma faced Kobayashi. “They raped us almost every day. If we refused at any
point, they would take us out and torture us. We all had to sleep in the same
room and listen as we were violated, body and soul; some of us were killed.
They said this was to help us, to make us pious people, but they lied.
“Eventually, my parents realized that what was happening to us was wrong. They
took me and my sister and fled. I remember we ran, all night, not caring about
what was behind us. We ended up in Chaos dragon territory, but after they heard
our story, they let us stay there. That’s where I met Tohru; we became close as
children.
“But, I always wanted to go back home. Even if they were painful memories
there, it was my home. It’s where I grew up. When I heard that the cult had
been disbanded, I went back there and tried to start a new life. And then… I
got here.”
Kobayashi could only look at Elma. Throughout her telling, her face was one of
a quiet strength. Her posture was composed, but only because she was using
every ounce of strength not to react to the thoughts that were probably coming
through.
“I’m… I’m sorry.”
Elma nodded. “There’s a reason that I’m telling you this. I know what Kanna has
gone through, the feelings she will experience. What you need to know is that
she needs people, she needs others if she is to recover. She can’t be
isolated.”
“I- I see.” As Elma left the room, Kobayashi was left by herself.
*
He coughed slightly; he couldn’t tell if it was from the nicotine smoke or the
overwhelming smell of arousal. Makoto wondered how it would have smelled in the
older days, where there was more of an anarchic joy about it.
Joy was something he was bereft of at the moment, however. He was having one of
his episodes, he knew it. For now, all he could do was let it pass, the quicker
the better. That’s why he was here. Specifically, at the Royal Garden.
“Hey, Makoto.” Hikaru, who still barely looked overage (how old is he? 35, I
think?), was giving him that trademark smile that was a specialty of the
Garden. “What do you need today?”
He shrugged. “Nothing particular.”
Hikaru frowned slightly. “Is something the matter, Makoto? You’re typically one
of our happier customers.”
“I’m just… dealing with things right now.”
“And you think this is going to fix it?”
Makoto glared at Hikaru, who just shrugged. “Alright, I’ll set you up with
Touya.”
“Not him, he talks too much.”
“Jeez, for someone who’s not looking for anyone in particular, you’re kinda
picky.”
Makoto was restraining every urge he had to scourge Hikaru with his words. He
wasn’t doing anything wrong, if he was being fair, but he wasn’t in the mood
right now for small talk.
“In that case, Joji is available.”
“… He’ll do.” Makoto gave Hikaru the appropriate amount of money and went
upstairs.
The sounds of rutting could be heard from the rooms upstairs, but muffled
through closed doors. The sounds both annoyed him and calmed him down. He got
to the room and knocked on the door.
The door opened. “Hey, Takiya.”
“Hey.” Makoto had hired Joji a few times before. He was reliable, quiet, and
overall the kind of man who just wanted to do a good job. “What do you want
today?”
Makoto looked at Joji up and down. I don’t want to see your face today. I want
to think you’re him. “Bend over on the bed.” The man did so. Makoto took his
pants off, went behind Joji, and, with no hesitation, inserted himself into
him.
As he thrusted, he looked across from him at the mirror in the room. He looked
down at the scar that was on the right side of his stomach.
He was scared at that moment, more than ever before, because he believe that he
would die.
“I won’t have a freak like him living under my roof!”
“Hiro, stop it, he’s your-”
He shoved her.
“Hey!” He went up and punched him. “Leave Mom alone!”
In a moment, he felt the knife enter him. He could only watch really as the
blood started to stain his white shirt.
He didn’t want to think anymore, that’s the whole reason he came here. So, he
just focused all of his energy into fucking the whore that was underneath him.
*
He found the quest he had just finished to be quite odd. Apparently, there was
a sphinx attacking a nearby town, so he had to kill it.
Sphinxes don’t attack random towns, though. They stay by roads and kill anyone
who doesn’t solve their riddles.
He needed to get some more supplies, so he got onto his horses and started
riding. Right now, he was passing through a forest area, filled with pine trees
and the sounds of nature. That didn’t interest him; he just needed to get back.
He noticed something as he was riding, something he had seen dozens of times in
this game before. But right now, it made him stop.
It was a cottage, painted white and green. It had two windows in the front and
a wooden door with a yellow diamond painted on the front.
“You’re so picky, Fafnir! No matter what I put into your food, you always find
something to complain about.”
He looked over at him. “I still eat it. Consider that a great sign of
appreciation.”
Abel smiled that iridescent smile at him, his cloudy eyes full of ideas. “Ah,
you’re slipping, Fafnir. You’re showing affection.”
Fafnir just stared and looked back at his food. “I’ll have to be gone for a
while.”
“Oh, why is that?”
“There’s some treasure I’ve heard of that I would like to collect.”
Abel pouted and walked over to Fafnir. “Why would you need to go elsewhere,
silly dragon? Your greatest treasure is-” He sat in Fafnir’s lap. “Right-” He
placed his hands on Fafnir’s face. “Here.” He kissed Fafnir’s lips, and the
dragon held him tight.
It was two weeks later that he returned, his treasure in tow. He opened the
door. He couldn’t see Abel. There was a note on the table. He read it. He read
it again. One more time. And, then, the lightning came down unto the ground.
He prepared a fire spell and then lit the cottage on fire. He felt a
nothingness in him as he watched the flames crackle and the wood splinter under
the heat. He logged out of the game and looked outside. The rain was heavy that
night, the gale rolling over the buildings, the thunder roaring as if some
great beast was in pain.
I wish he was here. He would have enjoyed it. He would have to do it in his
place.
***** Protest of the Body *****
                              Protest of the Body
It was during a late afternoon at the Magatsuchi’s house when the knock came at
the door. Lucoa was watching TV, while Mrs. Magatsuchi was getting lunch ready
for the two of them.
“Who could that be?”
Lucoa shrugged. “I’ll see who it is.” She got to the front door and opened it.
It took her a moment to recognize who it was. He was about her height, with
black eyes and shortly-cropped blonde hair, wearing a thin overcoat. He looked
wearied, as if he had been running for a long time.
“H-Hey, Lucoa…” His voice sounded ragged, but it was still familiar.
“Lacandon.” She hadn’t seen him in… well, since he could barely communicate
with spirits, like his parents. But she knew it was him.
“So this is your nephew.” Mrs. Magatsuchi had gotten to the door by this point.
“It’s nice to meet you. I’m ----- Magatsuchi; your aunt has been staying with
us.”
“The pleasure is mine.” He shook her offered hand. “Um, would it be alright if
I came in, just for a bit?”
“Of course not.” Lacandon stepped in hesitantly. “Are you hungry? We were about
to have lunch.”
“Ah, no, I couldn’t bother you that-” His speech was stopped by a rumbling from
his stomach. “On second thought, I could use some food.”
Lunch went by quickly, but silently. Lacandon did not say much to either of
them beyond the expected pleasantries. No statement on what he was doing here,
or why he seemed so stressed.
After lunch, as he was leaving, Lucoa asked Lacandon, “You know, if you need a
place to stay-”
“Actually, I’m, uh, alright at the moment.” It was at that moment that she
noticed the twitch in his eyes, the constant gaze to his side.
“You can tell me if something’s wrong. Even if I haven’t seen you in a long
time, I’m still family.”
Lacandon looked at her. She could see his black eyes looking at her, into her.
Finally, he started to speak.
“My partner, the man I was with… he liked to beat me. For no reason at all, he
would start hitting me, scratching me, clawing me, only to heal me and start
the process all over again. Sometimes, he would strap me down and… put things
in me; it was… difficult for me to sit down most days. He… He enjoyed it so
much, almost like I had become a toy to him. I was scared to run, wondering
what would happen to me if he caught me. Then, one day, while he was out, I
just… left. I don’t know why, but I felt my body move on its own, getting away
from there. Then, I came to myself, but I was far away from that place. I
figured that, if I went to this world, I could get away from him. So, that’s
where I’ve been.”
Lucoa found herself frozen. This happened to her nephew, to her blood? “Did…
Did you ever tell your parents?”
“He knew people, people who were just as powerful as Mom and Dad. He said
they’d kill everyone I loved if I tried to tell anyone. So, I just stayed
quiet.”
“Do- do you know that your parents are here.”
Lacandon nodded. “Yeah, I- I’ve seen them around… I’m going to tell them, soon,
I promise. I… I just needed a few more days to get my head straight.”
“OK then.” She embraced him, and he her. “If you need someone, I’m always
here.”
“I know. Thanks.” With that, he walked off, his footsteps slowly disappearing
to the city noise. Lucoa went back into the house.
“So, how is your nephew doing?”
“He’s… he’s good.” Mrs. Magatsuchi gave her a knowing look. “Well, better than
he was before.”
*
“God damnit, where’d the fuck did I put my papers?” The detective walked into
her part of the office, the fresh smell of cigarette smoke on him. “Hey, Hina,
you’d see my file on the Monozaki case? I’ve been looking for it for the past
15 minutes.”
“Right here on my desk, where I told you it would be after I was done reading
it.”
Ryuji looked down at the desk. “How the fuck am I still a detective?”
“Because, when you remember where your shit is, you’re one of the best minds
here.” Ryuji was something of a klutz, but he was like a hound when he was
working on something. “You find out anything new about the girl?”
“No secret boyfriend, no family debts, no known sexual predators. Far as I can
tell, Toka Monozaki just fucking disappeared walking home from school.”
“Yeah, and people just disappear all the time, but this one’s really got you by
the balls.” She was quite surprised when he called her in; Ryuji was known for
being singular in his investigations. “What’s up?”
“It’s just… one of her friends said that, in the days before she disappeared,
she felt like there were eyes on her constantly. That, no matter where she
went, someone was near her, watching.”
“She’s a girl in the city, there’s always someone looking.”
Ryuji smirked. “Fair. Anyway, I’m gonna look at my file again, see if anything
comes out.” He picked it up. “Thanks.”
“Any time.” As he left, Hina thought about what would happen if they ever find
the girl. She hoped she was alive; that was probably the best of this job,
seeing someone get a happy ending. Even if it sounded naïve, that’s why she
became a cop. She wanted to help people, to, as her criminology mentor would
have said, restore the social norm. That wasn’t always possible, but when it
did, it was great.
Like that Kobayashi girl. She wondered how she was doing.
She looked like she has a good system of support. I think she’s doing good. At
least, good as someone like her can.
*
It had been weird doing P.E., even now. They had a new teacher, a middle-aged
woman, but his spirit haunted the place. She only had to look at the other
girls to know that.
“What’s wrong, Kanna-san?” She looked over at Saikawa. Her girlfriend (that’s
what I call someone like that, right?) had always been there for her, making
sure she was safe, but gave her space when she needed it. And right now, that’s
all she wanted.
“Nothing.”
Saikawa smiled. “That’s good.” She leaned forward and pecked her on the cheek.
She heard snickering from nearby. She looked over to see a group of fifth
graders pointing at them.
Saikawa stood up. “What are you looking at?”
“Oh, just a bunch of dykes.”
The two of them looked at each other. Dyke? Like what they use to manage water?
What does he mean by that?
“Yeah, dykes. That’s what you two are, girls who like girls. Least, that’s what
my dad calls them.” The other guys around him were snickering. He’s just doing
this for attention. Familiar.
“So what if I like her? What makes that your problem?”
“Well, girls are supposed to be with boys.”
“Ugh, boys are gross. I’d rather be Kanna-san than a…” She was clearly thinking
of something to say back to the boy. “A pussy.”
Suddenly, the boy’s eyes narrowed. Kanna could fear the rage emanating from
him. “What’d you call me?”
“You heard me, a pu-”
The punch impacted her on the right side, right over the eye. She fell to the
ground immediately and wasn’t aware enough to react when he kicked in the chest
once, then again. Kanna felt her body freeze, like a deer about to be eaten.
His friends were starting to get nervous. “Hey, maybe we shouldn’t be doing
this, I mean, what if the teacher-”
“Who gives a crap about the teacher?” He looked down and spat in Saikawa’s
face. “Calling me a pussy,” he was whispering now as he kicked her one more
time, “you stupid bitch.” He then looked over at Kanna. “And you.” He laid his
hand on her shoulder and cocked his fist back.
That face, it looks- no
It wasn’t him, he was gone, he was taken, he was
“Thank you for being a good girl, Kanna-chan.”
Right before the punch could land, the boy felt a slight touch to his sternum.
Suddenly, with a speed that no one could notice, the boy flew back, eventually
hitting a nearby tree and falling to the ground.
Kanna panted and looked around. Everyone was still and silent, watching her.
The teacher had disappeared. She looked over at Saikawa. She rushed to her.
“Saikawa.” She held her close. Saikawa winced. “Are you OK?”
“Y-Yeah, I’m O-OK.” Saikawa coughed several times.
“Good.” Kanna didn’t know why, but she was scared to think about what would
have happen in she wasn’t.
*
“E-Excuse me, I’m Kanna Kobayashi’s guardian. I’m looking for the principal.”
The teacher at the front of the school pointed to a man in his late 50s talking
with another teacher. “Thank you.”
She had gotten the call at home, while she was working on that project; all
they said was that Kanna had been involved in an incident at school and she had
to come down immediately.
Oh God, please don’t let her be hurt.
“Ah, you’re Kobayashi. Thank you for coming on such short notice.”
“I-It’s alright. I’m on vacation right now, so I wasn’t at work. W-What
happened to Kanna?”
“To her, nothing in particular.” He must have noticed her puzzled gaze. “From
what we can tell from what everyone has told us so far, a group of older boys
approached Kanna and her friend, Riko Saikawa.”
“I-I’ve met her.”
“Well, it seems that the boys were commenting on their close behavior, calling
them… well, how do I phrase this…” He seemed almost embarrassed to say it.
“I’ve been in a few dive bars at 3 am. I’ve heard the worst.”
“Ah.” He stroked his chin; there was a slight 5 o’clock shadow there. “Well,
the head of the group called them dykes.”
“Oh.” That was a word that was passed around in reference to her quite a bit in
high school.
“After that, Riko confronted the boys about it, eventually calling their leader
a… well, conflicts exist in the reporting, but consensus is saying that the
word was ‘pussy’.”
Good for her.
“After which point, the head boy punched in the face and kicked her three times
while she was on the ground.”
Oh. “What did Kanna do?”
“It seems that she was about to be punched by the boy, but she then hit him.”
He paused, tapping his foot on the ground. “Let me ask you a question. How does
an 8-year-old girl, slight of frame, with a single push, knock a boy 2 years
her senior into a tree so hard he is knocked unconscious and has several
cracked ribs?”
Kobayashi’s eyes felt like they were going back and forth faster than a car on
a racetrack. “Adrenaline?”
The principal looked like he wasn’t sure if he should just let go or berate her
for thinking he would believe that. “Well… People have been known for doing
extraordinary things in times of danger.” There was a note in there of ‘I’ll
let that go, but I’m not liking it.’
“So… what now?”
“Well, if you’re thinking about punishment, the boy will receive several days
of detention for his behavior once he recuperates. As for Kanna and Riko, they
were acting in self-defense, so they’ll be fine.”
“How are they doing?”
“Riko seems like she’ll be fine; she’ll have a nice shiner for a while, though.
As for Kanna… physically, she’s unhurt, but it took us a while to convince her
to let Riko go so that she could be examined. She was holding her in a vice
grip, all the while having these trembling eyes looking only at Riko.”
Kobayashi looked down at the ground. Something was starting to gnaw at her now,
something she’d been ignoring for a while. She pushed it back. That’s for
later.
“In light of her… recent assault, if she needs more time out of school, it
would be understandable.”
“I’ll… talk to her about it tonight.”
“OK then. She’s right this way.”
They were both in the nurse’s office, sitting on one of the beds. Saikawa was
the first to look at her, a racoon eye already forming. Kanna was just looking
at her, holding her hand.
“Kanna-chan.” She looked over at her for a moment, then looked back at Saikawa.
“Hey, Saikawa, how are you doing? Your parents here yet?”
“I-I’m fine. And they’ll be here soon.”
“Good.” Kobayashi smiled. “Thanks for looking for her when I’m not around.”
“O-Of course.” Kobayashi thought it was kinda cute the way she blushed when
someone talked about Kanna. Someday, when they’re older, maybe they can get
together.
“Kanna-chan, you ready to go home?” Kanna didn’t seem to notice, still focusing
all of her attention on Saikawa.
“I’ll be back tomorrow, Kanna-san. You should go home.”
Kanna blinked several times before leaning forward and kissing Saikawa on the
lips.
Wait, did I miss something?
“Tomorrow.” With that, she got off of the bed and left with Kobayashi.
Their journey home was silent, mostly on Kobayashi’s part.
So, those boys were accurate, if crude… and that’s why Saikawa always stayed so
long. Did they ever do anything? No, they’re still young, and I don’t remember
doing anything like that. Of course, I didn’t even know what I was back then.
They got home, with Kanna immediately laying herself on the couch.
“How are you feeling, Kanna-chan?”
She shrugged. “OK.”
“That’s good.”
… “Kobayashi?”
“Yes?”
“Can someone be brave even if they are scared?”
An odd question, but I think I know why. “Sometimes, we’re the bravest we can
be when we are scared. Were you scared today?” Kanna nodded. “Of the boy?”
“N-No, not really… When he touched my shoulder, I saw him, Mr. Sunohara.”
Kobayashi looked down at Kanna. oh no.
“And… when I saw him, I felt really scared, like he’s going to hurt me again,
like he did before. I know he wasn’t there, but I still felt him. That’s why I
pushed that boy, but also… I wanted to hurt Mr. Sunohara, like I should’ve done
before.”
She was thinking about him, she always has. Well, of course, she did,
considering what happened to her… But I didn’t think she did. Because I didn’t
want to think about. I… I didn’t want to bring it up, so I let myself think she
didn’t want to talk about what happened. How- How long would this have gone on?
“Kanna, have… have there been times when you’ve wanted to talk about what
happened to you?” The dragon looked at her before nodding. “Have there been
times when you’ve didn’t feel comfortable talking about it?” She nodded again.
“Why?”
“Well, you didn’t want to talk about, and neither did Lady Tohru, so… I didn’t
want to bother either of you.”
Kobayashi felt her eyes start to sting. She picked Kanna up and placed her in
her lap. “It- It wouldn’t be bothersome to either of us. It’s- It’s our fault
for making you feel this way.” Kanna was looking up at her with dewy eyes. “If…
If you ever want to talk with us about what happened, or anything else, it’ll
be alright, OK? It won’t bother us, I promise.” She held Kanna close to her.
“I’m sorry that I made you feel that way.”
“It’s OK, Kobayashi.” The two of them stayed like that for a while (Tohru was
out buying food and other supplies). Kobayashi combed Kanna’s hair, watching
the birds fly by their building.
I might as well breech that other topic. “Kanna-chan, how close are you and
Saikawa?”
Kanna looked up at her. Her eyes were suddenly warm and sparkling. “She’s…
she’s my girlfriend. At least, that’s the word, right?”
“Um… yes.”
Kanna nodded. “We haven’t done a lot different than what we did before. We
just… kiss, cuddle.”
“Do you like being with her?”
Kanna nodded. “She’s… like a fire on a cold night. She makes me feel warm and
safe and comfortable. And I like how she’s willing to show how much she cares
about me. Like how Lady Tohru acts around you.”
“Ah, I see- Wait, what?”
“Lady Tohru is always telling you that she loves you and is always wanting to
do things for you.” Kanna looked straight into Kobayashi’s eyes; it was
piercing. “Do you love Lady Tohru?”
“Uh…. Umm… It’s… complicated… I’m gonna take a nap for a little bit, OK?” Kanna
nodded and Kobayashi went into her bedroom, shutting the door. She was feeling
hot, so she stripped herself down to her underwear and laid herself on her bed.
Do I like Tohru? Well, she’s kind of a pain in my ass, and she still sometimes
doesn’t get things here, but… she is sincere about wanting to help me, and she
has been great around the house, and… Kobayashi licked her lip. She does have a
great body.
“Thinking about me, Miss Kobayashi?”
“Huh, Tohru, when’d you get-”
“Shh.” Tohru placed her finger on Kobayashi’s lips. “You don’t need to say
anything, just let your body work on its own.”
Eyes closed and mind barely aware, Kobayashi moved her fingers into her
panties.
“Toh-Tohru-”
“Don’t worry, Miss Kobayashi. I’ll be gentle to you.” Kobayashi felt her
breathing go ragged. This isn’t real, I know it isn’t, but I want it tobereal.
She had put one of her fingers inside herself and started to move it in and
out.
Tohru had moved down and placed her head between Kobayashi’s legs. “Mmm, it
smells so sweet, Miss Kobayashi.” She felt a tongue there, and she shivered in
excitement and fear. “And so tender.” The assault began, with the slimy invader
attempting to penetrate the gates. It was having great success.
“Toh-Tohru, don’t- mmm, don’t stop…” The two fingers inside of her were moving
faster and faster now, while her thumb was starting to rock her bud.
It was getting to be too much; Tohru was clearly skilled at this, as she made
sure every part of her down there was treated well.
“T-T-Tohru, I’m g-gonna…” She mewled and squirmed in the ecstatic agony.
“I don’t mind, Miss Kobayashi, just let it all out.”
As her body squeezed around her fingers, her toes curled, and her body spasmed
from the electricity flowing through it, only one terrifying, exciting thought
passed through her mind.
I love you, Tohru.
***** Blood on Your Hands *****
                              Blood on Your Hands
They were off on another raid, the village looking the same as every other one
they had razed so far. Houses made out of pathetic wood, just asking to be
burnt to the ground. They were all filled with tiny humans, lives that would
not have an impact, lives that would begin and end within a mile of each other.
“OK, get ready to fire soon.” She felt a certain amount of pride in being in
command of this group. She was her father’s child, and she was always willing
to prove it. “Now then, fire.”
The lucky ones either died in their sleep or burned instantly. There were few
lucky ones that day. She could hear the sounds of them crying out, and it
filled her with a certain sense of joy. Hmph, why are they so surprised? We’ve
been doing this ever since their grandparents were still swimming in their
father’s ballsacks.
The village was now a smoldering ruin, so she had just turned around to head
back when she felt a stinging pain in her wing. She crashed towards the earth,
landing in the middle of the village. She looked over to see a spear stuck in
her wing. She flapped her wings to get it out but then felt another pain coming
from one of her back paws. She saw movement in the area and watched as hands
and weapons rose from the ashes. The corpses of the dead came from the earth
and wandered towards her. She felt pains in her wings, her tail, her body, her
paws.
No! I’m-I’m a dragon! I’m five years away from becoming ten! One of them was
preparing an arrow, his muscles visible as they aimed at her eye. Daddy, save
me!
She woke up in a cold sweat, the sheets drenched. I’ll have to clean those
later. She rose from the bed in a daze.
How many humans had she killed for her father? Thousands, tens of thousands?
She never kept track; they were all just the same to her. She was only 5 and 23
when she asked her father if she could join his men in one of their razings.
She was so proud to see him smile at her that she didn’t really think about
what it was that she was doing: murder. Not only murder, but the murder of
innocents, of families, of men, women, and children, of cripples and idiots, of
whole populations. Even if the humans could attack them, they never had time.
The only thing they could do was burn.
Before she came to this world, Tohru never cared about those she had killed;
they were just humans after all. But now she was here, surrounded by them,
having to interact with them every day of her life. She liked some of them. She
loved one of them. And now she had to think of them as actual people, people
with lives and families and lovers. And she wondered what the lives of those
she killed were like. What were they doing before they died? Were they sound
asleep in their beds next to their kind? Were they already awake, getting for a
day of labor to make sure their children didn’t go hungry? Had they seen them
already, and were getting their prayers to their gods done quickly? Every
thought led down the same path, to a place of unrelenting self-hatred.
Sometimes, it was hard to get away from there.
Still, she was Miss Kobayashi’s maid, and she had to get breakfast ready for
her.
“Good morning, Tohru.”
“Ah, good morning, Miss Kobayashi.” She felt an odd sensation behind her, so
she turned around. Miss Kobayashi was staring at her. “Is something wrong?”
“No, Tohru. I was just… thinking about something.”
“Oh, OK.” As she continued making breakfast, she thought about Miss Kobayashi.
She still wasn’t receptive to the idea of the two of them being together, which
Tohru had learned to accept by this point. But, in the back of her mind, she
still indulged in the occasional fantasy where the two of them lived and loved
together.
It was a nice idea. Too bad it was just an idea.
*
The cottage was still burnt. Whoever had it before had either not seen it yet
or had left it behind. He hadn’t felt any relief from it, like he thought he
would. He hadn’t brought his lover back or found the one who took him away.
Abel. It was his eyes that first attracted him, those cloudy greys. They had
bumped into each other one day, Fafnir returning to his cave, while Abel had
been just out wandering. Fafnir was originally going to kill him for his
impudence, but Abel annoyed him so much that he forgot about his rage and could
only wonder as to who this person was, someone with eyes like those.
They slowly got to know each other, first as acquaintances, then as friends,
then as lovers. They got a little cottage together for themselves, and they had
lived together for over 3 and 60 years, with Fafnir often traveling the world
to find new treasures, while Abel stayed home, always keeping the house ready
for his return. They didn’t talk much, to be honest, but they never needed
conversation. They just needed each other’s comfort to be happy. When he was
gone, he didn’t know what to do with himself.
A man was looking at him with a grim smile.
Fafnir blinked and righted himself. Who was that? I don’t recognize him from
anywhere. He sat in his chair for a moment, then went back to his game.
He would think upon it. Another time.
*
The two of them were walking to Saikawa’s house, as Kanna was sleeping over
there that night, when she saw them.
They were slightly taller then them, and both boys. The one on the left had
shoulder-length grey hair with streaks of brown, wearing a white sweater and
black pants, while the one on the right had a multiplicity of colors in his
short hair, primarily brown, black, red, and blonde. He was wearing a dark red
hoodie with the hood down and a pair of bright blue shorts. Both of their faces
looked alike, in particular their golden eyes.
“Kim-un? Yushkep?” They responded to Kanna calling out their names and smiled
at her.
“Hey, Kanna.” She rushed over to them, leaping into her brothers’ arms. They
both embraced her tightly as she felt a warm sensation overwhelm her. “It’s
been a while.”
“It has.” She then remembered that Saikawa was still there, leapt to the
ground, and brought her over. “Saikawa, this is Kim-un.” she indicated the boy
with the grey hair. “And Yushkep.” she pointed at the boy with the multicolored
hair. “They’re my older brothers. Kim-un, Yushkep, this is Saikawa, my
girlfriend.”
“Oh, so this girl has stolen our sister’s heart?” Kim-un responded in his
typical deadpan; Kanna and Kim-un were similar in what one could call their
lack of emotional range. “What do you think about that, Yushkep?”
“I’m not sure, brother. Will we have to fight this girl to make sure our
sister’s in the hands of someone who can take care of her?” Despite his words,
Yushkep’s grin made his intentions clear.
“Knock it off, you two, you’re scaring her.” They still have this routine
practiced.
“Ah, my apologies, dear sister-in-law.” He held Saikawa’s hand to his face and
kissed the back of it, sending her into a deep blush.
“What are you two doing here, anyway?” Has Father sent them to take me back
home? Is my exile over? There was a part of her that was hoping it wasn’t.
“It’s not just us two here, Kanna. All of us are.”
“’All of us?’”
“Well, except for Mother, but, yes, all of us are in this world.” She found it
odd that he didn’t mention Father, but, still.
All of my siblings are here. I should visit- wait.
“You said all of them, right?”
“Yes.” Kim-un seemed confused by her question.
“Even Pauchi?”
Her two brothers gained nervous looks and turned to each other, then back to
her. “Yes, even Pauchi.”
Her sister was on the ground, blood around her.
“K-Kanna, did you do this?”
“I- I see.”
“Um, Kanna,” Yushkep was trying to get the conversation back to normal. “I’m
sure everyone else would like to see you.”
Kanna was looking at the ground, a growing sense of dread filling her. She
couldn’t handle that right, the pain, the fear, the humiliation.
“Not today. Tomorrow.”
Yushkep was about to speak, but Kim-un looked at him, then back to Kanna.
“OK then, Kanna.” He kneeled down to her and whispered an address into her.
“That’s where we’re staying right now. And, Kanna.” He looked at her, his
golden eyes boring into her, almost like Father’s when he was importing
something serious onto them. “Don’t tell anyone that we’re here, OK? Nobody.”
She nodded.
“Good.” He held her tight, letting her hear his heartbeat. Then, he let her go,
and the two boys walked away from them.
“Is everything with your family OK, Kanna-san?” She’d had almost forgotten that
Saikawa was there.
I don’t know. “I think so.”
*
There was a part of her that was starting to dread coming home. Almost every
night, it seemed like the same thing: she’d get depressed at some point, the
two of them would have sex, and the next morning she’d regret it.
“I’m home.” Iruru was laying on the couch, as per usual, with her scales
changed to make her appear in a bikini top and a pair of short shorts, letting
all of her curves show. She hated how she felt so aroused by it.
The worst part about this whole thing was that she actually did like Iruru.
Sure, there were definitely parts about her that were problematic, like her
sexual over-aggression and her malingering, but overall, Iruru was clear-
headed, hardworking in her share of the chores, and had an optimistic presence.
The contradictions were boggling her mind.
She felt two mounds press against her back as she headed to the bathroom. “Mmm,
Elma-chan, I’ve been feeling quite lonely. I need some relief.”
Something in her wanted that, craved that, but today, something else in her
resisted. “Not tonight, Iruru.”
“Oh,” she moved her head to look at Elma, “I thought you liked it when I drove
the demons away.”
“I thought I did, but that was always before you put yourself inside me.”
Iruru shrugged. “OK, then.” She sat back down on the couch. “I mean, you did
ask for it.”
Something in her broke. A phrase that she had heard too many times by people
who were the reasons it happened in the first place.
“What did you just say to me?”
Iruru blinked. “I said that you-”
“I know what you said. I just wanted to make sure that you were willing to
repeat it.” Elma walked over to Iruru and towered over her. “You have no idea
what I’ve been through, and you say those words to me?”
Iruru furiously stood up and glared at Elma. “Oh, you say that, but you have
not felt the torments I’ve been through.”
“Oh? As a child, was there a time in your life when you were trapped by some
group who just wanted to hurt you?”
Iruru’s glare became duller as she moved inward to herself. “Y-Yeah.”
Elma paused before continuing. “Well, were you beaten many days for no reason
at all?”
Iruru nodded at that, her eyes watering. It took Elma a few moments to find the
strength to ask the final question. “Did- Did they rape you, almost every day?”
Iruru’s tears began flowing after that. “yes.” The pink haired dragon blinked
several times. “Wait, did-”
Elma just nodded. She suddenly wrapped Iruru into her arms and began to cry as
well. She felt a deep pit of guilt in the bottom of her stomach as the two of
them muttered apologies to each other.
“I-I’m sorry, Elma. I-I did those things to you, and a-after what happened to
you, I just-”
“Iruru.” She tilted the dragon’s head up to look at her. “I also have something
to apologize for. I knew that something had happened to you, and that you
wanted to talk about it, but you didn’t know how, and I was too wrapped up in
my own problems to truly realize that. I should have done something.” She
kissed the dragon’s forehead and laid Iruru’s head against her chest. “What
happened, Iruru?”
There was silence for a few moments. “They killed my Mama and Papa. They used
some kind of magic to bind me to their will. I was still aware, but I couldn’t
do anything without their permission. There were a lot of us, boys and girls
that they took. They whored us out: men, women, dragons, anyone who wanted to
use us as their playthings and had the money could do so. Sometimes, when no
one wanted one of us, they would torture them just for the fun of it.
“It was like that for a long time, I can’t remember how long. It had to have
been at least 2 and 50 when the man came by.
“He pretended like he was interested in a young boy, but it was a trap. He
killed those who took us, and set us free. We all ran our separate ways,
scattered to the corners of the world. For the longest time, I just wanted to
survive, separate from people. Eventually, I heard about this place, so I came
here. And then I found you.” Iruru’s tears had stopped by that point, and now
her eyes were redder than before. She looked exhausted. “And then I fucked it
all up.”
“I don’t think so.”
Iruru was startled. “B-But I hurt you. I made you do things you didn’t want to
do.”
“I wouldn’t say that’s fully true. I do like the idea of having sex with you,
don’t get me wrong. It’s just what we used it for that was the problem. We
thought it was the solution to everything, when really it just made things
worse.” Iruru only nodded as Elma combed her fingers through her hair. “Iruru?”
“Yes, Elma?”
“Do you want to be my girlfriend?” Visions were flooding through Elma’s head:
her coming home to Iruru in an apron, the two of them cuddling together on the
couch, watching some stupid TV show, the two of them having children to love
and care for. More than anything else, she wanted someone with whom she could
build a peaceful life, the life she always wanted.
“Y-You still want me?”
“Yeah. I really like you, and I want to give this a try.”
Iruru looked like she was giving it some thought, before she looked back at
her, determined. “Yes, I-I would love to be your girlfriend.”
Elma felt a smile come over her, greater than she had felt in a long time.
“Good.” She brought Iruru’s face to hers and kissed her on the lips. Iruru
greedily grabbed her breasts before stopping, looking nervously at Elma. “It’s
alright, but don’t be surprised if you feel a hand on yours.” Iruru grinned
like a child who was just given her favorite food before the two of them
continued to make out, feeling each other’s hands gliding over the curves on
their bodies.
Great Dragons- no, it still doesn’t feel right. In any case, to all the Gods
out there, thank you for giving me someone who understands me, and someone who
I can understand. Thank you.
***** Tell All *****
                                   Tell All
The moon was the only thing lighting the room, although it would go behind the
clouds at times, so there were dark moments as well. Saikawa was breathing
softly in her sleep, her chest rising and falling. She looked so peaceful, so
relaxed that Kanna didn’t feel like she had the right to wake her up. But she
had to, no, she felt like she had to. Saikawa deserved to know who she was, to
know everything.
“Saikawa.” She shook her. “Saikawa.”
Saikawa murmured a bit before waking up. “W-What is it, Kanna-san?”
“There-There’s something I need to tell you.”
“Mmm, can’t it wait til tomorrow?”
“No.” Saikawa awoke at the seriousness in Kanna’s voice.
“I-Is there something wrong, Kanna-san?”
“No, but I need to tell you something. You have to keep a secret, OK? You can’t
tell anyone, not even your family.”
“O-Of course, Kanna-san, I won’t tell anyone, I swear.”
Kanna sat up and focused. She let the magic shroud surrounding her draconic
image fall, revealing her horns, wings, and tail to Saikawa. “The truth is,
Saikawa, I’m a dragon.”
Saikawa went pale, her pupils widening. Kanna was scared for a moment. Did I
make the wrong choice? Did I tell her too soon?
“Kanna-san… you’re so pretty. Can I touch your wings?”
“Of course.” Kanna got closer to Saikawa so that she could feel her wings. She
had always liked the feeling of her wings; they were so soft to the touch. She
liked it when she wrapped herself in them, letting her bask in the warmth.
“Wow, they’re so soft and nice; it’s like a bird. But… you said you were a
dragon?”
“Every dragon is slightly different. Lady Tohru looks more like what your
culture would consider to be a dragon.”
“Oh, I see… So, are you from… somewhere else?”
“Yes, another world, different from yours.”
“Then, what are you doing here?”
… “I’d… I’d rather not say.”
“Oh, I-I’m sorry, Kanna-san!”
“It’s OK, Saikawa.” At least, you don’t know how much of a fool I am.
“So, you’re a dragon, and so is Tohru-san… is Kobayashi-san a dragon?”
“No, she’s only human.”
“OK.” Saikawa paused for a moment, then looked at Kanna with questioning eyes.
“How old are you, really?”
“In draconic years, I am 8 and 35. In human years, I am 340.”
“So… that means that… when I die, you’ll be the same age as you are know.”
A chill filled the air. “Yes, that is true, but know this, Saikawa.” She laid
her hand on top of hers. “I’ll treasure every moment I’m with you for the rest
of my life.”
“K-Kanna-san…” She hugged the dragon close to her. “What’s it like, to fly?”
she whispered into her ear, her cold breath filling Kanna.
It took a moment for Kanna to gather her thoughts, since no one had ever asked
her that question. “It feels like I’m weightless. I’m soaring through the
skies, looking down at the world. It seems so small compared to me. It feels…
awesome.”
“Wow, that sounds amazing.” Saikawa had sparkles in her eyes, then suddenly
yawned. “But we can talk about tomorrow.”
“OK. Good night, Saikawa.”
“G’night.” Both of them got covered again, but Saikawa had a question. “Kanna-
san, do you feel cold?”
“No.” It’s quite warm tonight; why would she ask that?
“O-OK.” Kanna scowled at herself. She made her answer sound too harsh.
She’s not going to hurt me. She wouldn’t, not now and not ever.
*
“Aunt Lucoa.” She heard a voice calling to her as she was walking down the
street. She turned around.
“Lacandon.” She smiled; he was definitely looking better. He wasn’t as ragged
or tired as when he first showed up on the Magatsuchis’ doorstep. “How have you
been?”
“Good. I, um, I met up with Mom and Dad. We’re actually heading back home
today, but I wanted to see you first before we go.”
“That’s good. So… did you tell them?”
Lacandon’s face faltered slightly. “Not, uh, not yet. I will; I just need some
time.” He was looking around the area.
“Lacandon, you’re hiding something, aren’t you?” She walked closer to him, but
he stepped back slightly. “You don’t have to afraid, I won’t judge you.”
… “I saw him.”
“Where?”
“In this city. I was just walking around, clearing my mind, when I saw him. I
only saw the back of his head, but I knew it, I could feel it.” His breathing
was ragged and his eyes had dilated, making it hard to see his iris.
“Hey, it’s going to be OK.” She held him close. Nothing’s going to hurt you; if
they do, they’ll regret it. “You’re going home soon. He won’t hurt you with
your parents around.”
“B-But what if he hurts someone here?”
“Then I’ll keep a look out for him. Could you tell me what he looks like?”
“He, um, he’s got blonde hair and green eyes. He typically wears a suit of some
kind. He has a ring on his right hand; the band is shaped like a dragon, and
it’s got a green jewel on it.”
“OK.” She let her nephew go. “I’ll make sure he doesn’t hurt anyone else.”
“O-OK, Aunt Lucoa.”
She smiled and kissed Lacandon on the forehead. “Now, then, I’m sure you don’t
want to keep your parents waiting, right?”
Lacandon blinked. “Oh, right. Uh, see you another time, Aunt Lucoa.” With that,
he ran off, waving to Lucoa.
She waved back and continued walking down the street.
I’m glad he’s heading back. He’ll be surrounded by those that care about him.
At the very least, he’ll be out of this world.
She had been thinking a lot about what her sister-in-law had told her, and she
was beginning to think that she was right. This world was highly advanced,
compared to the one that she came from, but it seemed to come at a great cost:
no one cared about the greater humanity that they were surrounded by. Back
home, everyone sacrificed what they could to make sure the whole survived; even
humans and dragons were known to work together if necessary.
Here, it’s everyone for themselves, and if you get left behind, it’s your own
fault. And I helped these humans, so long ago. If I had stayed…
The past had to stay past. For now, she could only look forward.
*
“Now, Kanna, you said you had five siblings, correct?” She nodded. “Could you
tell me about them?”
“Yes.
“The oldest is Pauchi; she’s 15 (and 28). She’s something of a leader to our
generation, always encouraging us to do our best. I worry sometimes, though,
that she has taken too much responsibility for herself.
“Then, there’s Apasam; she’s 13 (and 69). We’re quite similar in that we’re
both not comfortable around other people; we tend to stay silent except when
we’re around those that we’re close to. I do think, though, that she has
recently become more reluctant than usual to interact with people.
“My only brothers are twins: Kim-un, the older, and Yushkep, the younger. They
are both 10 (and 71) years old. They’re quite different, as twins sometimes
are. Kim-un is often serious and responsible, whereas Yushkep is more a
daredevil and care-free in how he approaches life. Still, they care deeply for
each other, even if they can get on each other’s last nerve.
“Then, there is my directly older sister, Kina-sut, who is 9 (and 18). She
often likes to be outside and surrounded by animals. Sometimes, I wonder if she
finds it easier to talk to animals than people, but she’s so bright that I know
better than that. Out of all of my siblings, I’d say she’s the most optimistic
of the group.”
“That’s quite perceptive, Kanna.”
“I… I know. I’m not always comfortable with other people, so I like to watch
them before interacting with them greatly, so I can make sure that I can trust
them.”
“Do you feel comfortable around your family?”
She had to bite her tongue, to make sure the truth didn’t come out. “Yes, I
do.”
-
She found herself lying in bed, with the sounds of the night being the only
thing she could hear. Her mind felt like it was aching from lack of sleep, like
she would die at any moment.
It was all because of that stupid prank. She couldn’t help herself; she just
liked pulling them off. Sure, there would be some embarrassment, some slight
pain, maybe a tongue-lashing from one of the clan leaders, but at the end of
the day, there would be laughter over it.
All that was supposed to happen was that whoever stepped on the rope was going
to be trapped in the air by their ankle, nothing too bad. But she got the wrong
kind of rope, the kind they used to disable the human’s war elephants. She
could still remember the way that Pauchi’s leg exploded from the force, and how
she looked at her, with those teary green eyes.
Most of all, she remembered her father’s sentence and the hurt on his face as
he gave it.
“Kanna Kamui, you should know better than this. While I have indulged your
childish pranks, this is too far. You have severely injured a clan member, your
sister. As such, I have decided that you shall be exiled from clan lands for a
period of one human year. You will be given transportation to wherever you wish
to stay, but after that, you are on your own. Hopefully, you will learn from
your mistake and return to us wiser.”
She had never seen her father try harder to hide his true feelings than at that
moment. She knew that Tohru had left for the other world, so she got a portal
there and found her. She didn’t want to lie to Tohru, but she still wanted to
hide her full shame.
Suddenly, Kanna sat up. She was afraid of what was going to happen next, but it
had to happen at some point. With a silent tread, she left the apartment and
flew to the address that her brother whispered into her ear.
They had found themselves a house in a nice neighborhood, one with two floors
and plenty of space. Not as big as their home, but then nothing could be that
big. Before she knocked, she had to make a choice about what she was going to
say. Do I tell them about what happened to me? They should know, but… No, no, I
can’t think about that too far, I can’t go there, I can’t let them know.
They’ll find out eventually, but I can control when. They’ll know, but notnow.
With that decision made, she knocked on the door. It took a moment, but someone
opened. A girl with vermilion hair down to her ankles and red eyes stood in the
doorway, dressed in a yellow, red, and black scale-designed dress.
“K-Kanna?”
“Kina-sut.” With that in the air, Kanna hugged her sister.
“Kanna!” Kina-sut brought her inside, to a combined dining/living room. “Hey,
everyone, Kanna’s here!”
Kim-un and Yushkep came to her and held her. Suddenly, from behind, she felt a
lithe pair of arms hug her. “Hello, Kanna. It has been a while.”
Kanna looked up. It has a girl with black and white hair and heterochromatic
blue and green eyes, wearing a multi-colored dress, mainly consisting of rose,
orange, and cyan. “Apasam…” She let herself be held closely to her sister. She
could hear someone walking down the stairs, someone with a limp. She looked
over to see a young woman walking down the hallway. She had purple hair and
dark black eyes, wearing a taut purple shirt and dark red pants. Kanna walked
up to her. “Hello, Pauchi.”
“Hey, Kanna.” Her sister had that same slight smile on her face, even though
she must have been still feeling the pain in her leg. It’s all because of me…
all on me…
Kanna fell down to her knees and prostrated herself. “Pauchi Kamui, I… I am
deeply sorry for what I did to you. It was my own foolishness that led me to do
it. Please… accept for this apology, even if it can not fully make up for what
I did.” It was taking everything she had not to embarrass herself further by
crying.
“K-Kanna, you don’t have to apologize-”
“Yes, I do. I have to.” She looked at her sister, tears welling in her eyes.
“Please.”
Her sister was silent before kneeling down. “I accept your apology, Kanna
Kamui.” She then hugged Kanna so tightly that she wondered if her sister ever
planned to let her go. It didn’t matter at that matter; she just let everything
out of her as she cried in her sister’s arms, all the while Pauchi combed her
fingers through her hair. Pauchi lifted her over to the couch, where all of her
siblings sat around her. “So, how have you been, Kanna?”
“G-Good. I’ve been staying with Lady Tohru.”
“Ah, and how has she been?”
“Good. She’s staying with a human.” At Pauchi’s stare, she responded “They
know.”
“Well, as long as they aren’t going around talking about it, then it should be
fine.”
Kanna nodded. “Where’s Mother and Father? Are they still in our world?”
There was a silence that went on for much longer than it should have. The worst
things went through Kanna’s mind. Are-Are they dead? Are we on our own? What
happened? What are we going to do?
“Kanna.” The silence was ended by Apasam. “Father… Father started hitting
Mother.”
That statement landed so far outside of Kanna’s perception of reality that it
took her a minute to realize that Apasam was saying something that she believed
to be true. “What happened?”
“We’re not fully sure ourselves. All that we know is that Father has been
acting oddly since you’ve been gone. He’s been talking about going to the other
world and enslaving the humans here, and then he started to hit Mother. We left
a few days ago; Mother will be coming soon after she takes care of a few
things.”
No, Father wouldn’t do that, he would never do anything like that. He loves her
too much to even think about something like that. But… Apasam isn’t the kind of
person who make up something like that. What happened to you, Father? Was it my
fault? Did I disappoint you too much?
“Kanna,” Yushkep moved onto the couch next to her. “We wanted to ask you… if
you wanted to stay with us here. We’ve got a lot of room, and we’d really like
you back.”
That question made her feel ever more conflicted than she did before. To be
back with my family, to be whole again… but they don’t have the right to do
that. He’s not here. Only he has the right to do that. But, if what they say is
true…
“Not right now. There… things are too complicated right now.”
“Alright.” Pauchi held her close. “Just know you’re welcome anytime, OK?”
Kanna nodded, knowing in her heart of hearts that she might never be truly
reunited again with her family. And there was part of her, a frightening part
of her, that liked the sound of that.
You can’t really know things about people if you don’t live with them.
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