Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/6342070.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      F/M
  Fandom:
      Skip_Beat!
  Relationship:
      Setsuka_Heel/Cain_Heel, Hizuri_Kuon/Mogami_Kyoko, Mogami_Kyoko/Tsuruga
      Ren
  Character:
      Setsuka_Heel, Setsu, Cain_Heel, Tsuruga_Ren, Takarada_Lory, Mogami_Kyoko
  Additional Tags:
      Romance, mature_romance, Sibling_Incest, Love, Sex, Heavy_Petting,
      Emotional, Loss_of_Control, graphical_descriptions, Erotica, Virginity,
      Sexual_Inexperience, Desire, Love_Confessions, Confessions
  Stats:
      Published: 2016-03-24 Completed: 2016-03-31 Chapters: 11/11 Words: 24656
****** It has always been you ******
by Leichenengel
Summary
     Two months have passed since the shooting for Tragic Marker had
     ended. Ever since then Ren's and Kyokos relationship made no real
     progress at all. Now the president suddenly wants Kyoko to act
     Setsuka Heel for a last time to attend the premiere of Tragic Marker
     and the party afterwards as Cain isn't supposed to like these sorts
     of get-togethers. To make it all worse Ren realizes that Cain and him
     are actually in a similar emotional dilemma. What will happen?
Notes
     Hello fellow Skip Beat!-Fans
     I highly reccomend knowing the Manga (and not just the Anime) as I am
     refering to happenings in the Manga a lot and without this knowledge
     you might be confused easily and also spoilered.
     This story will contain chapters with sexually explicit content even
     though I consider it an artful explicity - so no bad language,
     swearing or whatsoever - Ren&Kyoko are in love with each other after
     all ^-^
     I marked this 'Underage' because Kyoko isn't 18 yet while Ren is
     already 21.
     I am looking forward to your comments, bookmarks and subscriptions.
     EDIT: Aside from finally knowing how many chapters this will be
     having, I also re-read what I have written so far to annihilate a few
     typos and grammar issues as well as to replace/remove some words and
     expressions. No promises that I was able to make it better though ;D
     Thank you for reading c:
***** Prologue *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
“Mogami-san!”
Kyoko turned around and smiled. “Sawara-san. Konnichiwa.”
“Konnichiwa. Are you free?”
“Yes. I just finished school and came here to see if there was anything I could
do. After all, I am LoveMe Member Number One.” She struck a pose showing the
LoveMe-L with her Fingers adding the number one with another.
Sawara-san almost dazzled by her sudden pride in being member of the LoveMe-
Section regained his composure. “I was asked by Takarada-sama to tell you, that
there is a job he wants you to take care of. He wants to meet you in his office
for the details.”
Kyoko froze in her action looking all but happy hearing this. The jobs of the
president usually were embarrassing, dangerous or outrageously stupid. But then
again - The Heel Siblings had also been an idea of the president and ever since
the Tragic Marker production was finished – no actually since she was told that
Tsuruga-san would finish his role without her acting as Setsuka, she had felt
lonely.
“Mogami-san?” Sawara-san waved his hand in front of her face.
Kyoko who had suddenly been drifting away into thought with a slightly saddened
expression on her face came back to herself. “Ah gomen Sawara-san.”
“Aren’t you interested?”
“Yes yes I am. I was just…ehh…well I had some memories of previous jobs come to
my mind.”
“Mhh. Well he is waiting in his office.”
“Okay. I will just switch to my overall and then go see him right away. I must
admit. Even though his jobs tend to be sort of odd I am curious.” She smiled
honestly and waved her hand slightly as she parted with Sawara-san and went to
the LoveMe-Section locker room to get dressed for battle.
 
“Darling. Does Ren-chan actually know of your plan to reintroduce Setsuka?”
Ten-chan looked at Lory while preparing Setsuka’s wig which she had washed and
re-dyed ever since Lory had told her he was going to bring Setsuka back into
Cain’s life for a final showdown.
“He doesn’t. If he did it wasn’t such a pleasant surprise, was it?” Lory smiled
vigorously as a lot of possible scenarios including Setsuka’s and Cain’s
reunion struck his mind.
“I see – you must really like him to give him back his precious sister.” Ten-
chan smiled finishing the preparations for Setsuka.
“Heh – who knows – maybe I also like to torture him.” He chuckled rascally
before he waved goodbye to her with a charming smile. “I’ll send him to fetch
you as soon as I have explained the scenario to Mogami-san.” He made a gesture
with his head towards his assistant while talking about ‘him’.
“Alright, just don’t fluster her too much or I will have a hard time preparing
her.” She grinned and saw him off.
 
‘Alright! The president got another job for me to take care of. I will do my
best whatever it is!’ Kyoko struck a winning-kind of pose and looked at the
office door full of confidence. She knocked and was let in by the president’s
faithful assistant Sebastian – even though she made up that name for him due to
his butler-like behaviour.
“Ahh Mogami-san. So Sawara-san has been able to get in contact with you.” Lory
offered her a seat opposite of him and sent Sebastian off to get them something
to drink.
“Yes. We met when I was on my way to the locker room. I directly came from
school to see if there is something to be done.”
“I see I see. So you are finally taking pride in being a LoveMe-Member.” It
wasn’t a question. It was a statement and moreover a statement that did not
want to be objected.
“Sort of, yes. But anyways, I am here since Sawara-san said there was a job you
wanted me to do.” She looked stern, maybe a tad too stern.
“Right down to brass tacks huh?” He nodded to Sebastian with a faint smile as
he placed tea on the table and poured it into the cups.
“I admit your jobs often tend to be outrageously odd but then again they have
helped me grow as the girl I am and as an actress.” Her face was serious as she
looked at him.
Lory gave her an appreciative smile. “It’s good to hear that. So I believe you
will give your utmost best in this upcoming task?”
“Yes. I made up my mind!”
 
“Well then.” Lory suddenly smiled almost fatherly and leaned back after
grabbing his tea cup. “I have decided to extend The Heel Siblings for the
premiere of Tragic Marker and the party afterwards here in Tokyo.”
Kyoko’s eyes widened and unconsciously a warm smile formed on her face. “That…
that is… unexpected…” Her heart was racing a little as a lot of memories of the
past Heel Sibling scenarios chased each other within her head.
“It came to me when Ren called, that he was invited to participate the premiere
and the party by the director. He seemed reluctant to go though as naturally
Cain Heel isn’t someone to enjoy such things without having his sister with
him, no?”
Kyoko smiled faintly but then grew the smile into something that was more
suitable for Setsuka. “Of course Nii-san wouldn’t want to attend a crappy
premiere party without me.”
“Now that is the spirit. I am totally leaving this matter to you Mogami-san.
Now for the details, Ren does not know I was planning this. I just convinced
him to attend the premiere as Cain Heel. You will arrive at the hotel he is
staying in before he is leaving for the premiere. The hotel is also the host
for the party since it is close to the cinema. I called the director to make
sure Cain is getting a double room just like when you were acting as siblings
during the shootings.”
“I see so it’s a surprise. Since Setsuka was sent back to England officially
how come she is able to surprise him?”
“Well she after all loves her Nii-san doesn’t she? She couldn’t bear letting
him attend such a party without her by his side, could she?” Lory glared at her
challenging her imagination.
Kyoko glared back in a fashion that looked more like Setsuka then anything
else. “Of course Nii-san would call me to relieve himself of the stress of
being forced to attend that party. And since I am his beloved little sister,
who understands him most off all people in this world, I heard the unspoken
desire to have me return to him.” A devilish smile wandered over her facials.
 
Lory smiled almost viciously. “I see we understand each other. I have had Ten-
chan come over to get you ready. There isn’t any time to waste as the premiere
is tonight. We will meet you two tomorrow morning at a location close to the
cinema. Ren is already informed about it.” He nodded over to Sebastian who
vanished into one of the adjacent rooms to come back with Ten-chan a few
minutes later.
She smiled at Kyoko and Lory. “Are you done talking Darling?”
Lory nodded and looked back at Kyoko. “Any questions?”
Kyoko shook her head downing her lukewarm tea before getting up. “To be honest,
when the Heel Siblings were called to an end after Guam I started to feel
lonely.” To underline that statement she moved her hand to her chest.
Lory nodded. “I see, that is good. Anyways, this is definitely the last time
the Heel Siblings will come back together – unless there will be a sequel that
again stars Cain Heel as B.J..”
Kyoko smiled. “Since I know this is the final act I will give it my all and
everything.”
“Good then I leave this completely to you.” He nodded over to Ten-chan who then
took Kyoko into her care to cast the Setsuka Heel magic over her one last time.
Chapter End Notes
     Annotations about the japanese phrases:
     "-san" is used at the end of usually a last name if you want to
     politely refer to someone you aren't close with for example business-
     partner, co-workers or even classmates you are loosely befriended
     with. "-san" can be used for either men or women while the prefixs "-
     kun" is usually only used for boys. Sometimes tomboyish girls are
     refered to as "-kun" too.
     "Konnichiwa" means Good Day/Good Afternoon in both formal and casual
     Japanese.
     "Gomen" is a casual way of saying "Sorry". A more formal way would be
     "Gomen nasai".
     "-chan" is a prefix that is used to make someones name cute. Also
     children often use it up to an age where they get used to addressing
     people more politely. Adressing someone with "-chan" is considered
     impolite if you aren't a child or if you aren't close to that person
     like for example a close friend, a family member or a lover.
     "Nii-san" is how siblings would refer to their brother. It can be
     used with or without his name. So in this context she could either
     say "Nii-san" if her brother is actually there or if the people she
     talks to know him or she could say "Cain nii-san" to differentiate it
     a bit more.
***** Reunion *****
Cain was in his hotel room lounging on one of the beds staring at the wall. He
actually didn’t feel like attending the party at all. The premiere was sort of
his job as an actor, but the party afterwards seemed to be a tasteless joke.
There was no way he would attend the party without Setsu. He let out a hundred
year worth sigh that sounded half irritated and half sad. There was no use in
dwelling on past happenings. The night when he was so close to her, lingered on
his mind like a shadow soaked with desire. The last remains of her bite mark
had eventually vanished the day he sent her back to England. Not because he
wanted, but because he had to. When he noticed it had vanished, it felt like
some sort of dark foreboding he might never be able to see her again let alone
hold her tight or feel her warm breath brushing over the skin of his neck.
 
He clenched his fist in despair and rammed it into the blanket he was sitting
on several times before leaning over covering his face with both hands. It was
always the same. Whenever he felt too close to her they would be separated.
Either by their parents who were afraid that the two siblings could end up
building up some kind of unhealthy relationship or later when he was older he
separated himself from her whenever he felt like he was about to lose his mind.
He was his sister. His beloved little sister and yet no other woman ever meant
more to him than her. Frankly there never were any women who he had loved so
dearly.
 
He let out another sigh and lifted his head to throw a glance at the clock. It
was about time he got ready for the premiere though he didn’t intend to wear
something special. He never did. He would just go there as the same Cain Heel
he always displayed. So he went to the bathroom and took a shower while still
brooding over Setsu. When he finally left the bathroom fully dressed and ready
for the premiere he saw, that he hadn’t much time left to get there. Even
though the hotel was close to the cinema he might end up being late if he
didn’t hurry now. So he stuffed the room key and his wallet into the pockets of
his long coat and opened the door. His eyes widened in shock that gave way to
surprise.
 
“Setsu!” His body was frozen in movement.
“Nii-san!” Despite the fact that they could be seen she wrapped her arms around
him.
After a few seconds of total astonishment had passed he pulled her close to him
pressing her head to his chest. “What.... are you doing here?”
“Nii-san called and sounded worried about the party, so I decided I would come
back to cheer him up and to accompany him to the premiere and to the party.”
She detached herself from him a little and looked up with that sweet little
sister smile on her lips.
He sighed and glanced at her affectionately. “You shouldn’t have come. Mum and
Dad will be mad at me again for having you over.”
She detached herself fully and pouted a little while wrapping her arms around
herself. “So you aren’t happy to see me.”
“Yes – Yes I am. Why wouldn’t I? Still it’s a bit unexpected. Besides I was on
my way to the premiere and due to this I might be late.” He reached out his
hand and placed it on her cheek with a smile.
She smiled again as he would expect in such a situation and took his hand to
pull him out of the door. “Then we should hurry, shouldn’t we? You can’t be
late for the premiere. A lot of people will be there who will just expect
seeing you for real.”
He let her pull him and grabbed the door knob so the door would close behind
him before he linked his arms with hers to walk towards the lifts. “Yeah I
guess you are right.”
 
When the lift arrived they went in and for the first time since this unexpected
reunion he noticed her appearance looking at the reflective surface of the lift
wall. It was dangerous. Not in the exact sense of the word though. But ever
since he had noticed other men being interested in her, he had convinced her
wearing pants instead of dresses or skirts. But now there was no time left to
change her appearance. Did she actually have luggage with her?
“Say, where is your suitcase?” He detached himself from her and glanced over
her appearance and the next moment wished he hadn’t.
“I asked the receptionist to stash it until later when we return. I first
wanted to check if you are still here.” She noticed him glancing over her
appearance. “Do you like it?” She was wearing a leather skirt that barely
covered the first half of her thighs together with over knee fishnet stockings
and shiny black high heels with iron buckle decorations. Her upper half was
dressed in a lacy dark red-black corsage and a black leather jacket with the
zipper closed up to under her breast. So naturally she was showing a fair
amount of cleavage but no more than usual.
He gulped slightly at her question and gave a faint nod. “You could have
dressed a little less dangerous you know.”
“So? I just thought Nii-san likes this. You always did.”
“Certainly I do but since we are going to a premiere and a party this view
won’t be for me alone to behold.”
“Oh I see. Nii-san is jealous isn’t he?” She moved closer to him to lean
against his chest her face looking up to him with a devilish grin.
 
Before he could react or answer, the lift reached the floor of the lobby, so he
linked his arm with hers once again to hurry off to the premiere. Since it was
too late to walk there he stopped a taxi. So it happened that they arrived at
the cinema at the last moment. The director had offered to fetch him along with
the other actors in a limousine but he declined as he wasn’t fond of sharing
such narrow space with his co-actors. The fact that he and Setsu arrived in a
common Taxi caused a murmuring among the crowd. The actors and their family,
the filming crew and the director watched the movie in a separate auditorium so
they wouldn’t be bothered by the people who were cheering outside. The premiere
was going smoothly. While watching the movie a part of Kyoko shone through her
Setsu disguise as she wasn’t too fond of horror movies so she was unconsciously
clinging even more to Cain trying to suppress screaming but not able to
suppress the slight shuttering of her body.
“Am I so scary?” Cain asked softly while moving his mouth close to her ear so
she was the only one hearing him.
“You are terrifying Nii-san.” She smiled but didn’t stop clinging to him. “In
fact seeing the finished movie with all those computer graphics makes Nii-san’s
role even scarier then just during the shootings.”
He smiled back not really paying much attention to the movie even though he
kind of agreed with her. “So I apparently did y good job huh?”
She nodded detaching herself a bit again as the current scenes weren’t all that
scary. She remained rather un-clingy for the rest of the film.
 
After the premiere Cain and Setsu joined the director and the other actors in
the limousine. Now that Setsu was with him he wasn’t forced to pay attention to
the others and just slacked off as I always had done during the shootings with
Setsu on his lap just like a spoiled little sister. But there was still this
uneasiness and jealousy seething within him whenever he saw Murasame or one of
the other men glancing at Setsu. Even though she had clearly shown them, that
she had no interest in anyone of them they kept glancing at her. And tonight he
could understand it better than all the other times.
When they got out of the limousine at the hotel Setsu took his hand as he was
about to stride inside and so held him back. “Nii-san looks as if something is
troubling him.”
He stopped and turned around to her once again regretting to wander over her
appearance with his eyes. “As I expected the eyes of everyone are all over you.
I hate it. It irritates me.”
She let go of his hand and stepped towards him smiling faintly. “I bet they
feel similar. Since at the same time they are realizing that glancing is all
they can do. There is no way you would let them approach me.”
“True, but still it ticks me off. This sister of mine is only for me to behold
and to touch.” He looked rather grim while he said that and grabbed her hand to
finally go inside.
Setsu smiled up to him. “I know that and there is no way I will let hamster-san
ever get close to you again. After all, all you said goes for me as well.”
 
The party turned out to be rather some kind of get-together and talk about the
movie and give some interviews to magazines and a TV channel. There was music
and drinks and a lot of conversation but in fact it was boring. In the end Cain
and Setsu happened to hang out in a corner of the hall where the party was
taking place.
“Nii-san you seem bored, but to be honest I can see why.” She reached out her
hand and stroked his cheek smiling faintly.
“I’ve never been someone for get-togethers. Those glamour parties don’t
interest me either. I just wish we could finally leave. I’d rather spend the
rest of the evening with you in our room.”
He sighed and looked at her suppressing the urge to once again lose his self in
her appearance. This was no good. Ever since the forced socializing and the
interviews were over he had only eyes for her.
“Good that I have come to support you after all. Imagine being here without me.
Anyways why can’t we just leave? I think they can’t really expect you to stay
until the end, can they?” She took his hands sitting beside him with her body
turned towards him a little.
“I don’t know. Maybe you are right.” A vague smile appeared on his face as he
got up and looked down on her – by accident directly into her cleavage which
caused him to avert his eyes a bit too fast and have his heart beat in his
throat.
Of course she noticed. What kind of beloved sister would she have been if she
didn’t spot this? She got up and linked her arm with his. “Nii-san you seem
flustered all of a sudden.” Her voice had something teasing and she laughed a
little.
“Why would I be flustered?” He tried to sound as if he didn’t feel flustered at
all. Just why did she have to wear this stuff tonight?
“I don’t know. Tell me?”
“There is nothing to tell. I just want to get out of here.” He stopped and
turned towards her bowing down moving his lips close to her ear. “I finally
want to be the only one to behold my sister in this getup. The irritation that
others can see you like this drives me almost insane.” He was almost
whispering.
A slight tingling went down her spine and her heart skipped a beat. “Then we
should maybe hurry so I am all yours again.” She pulled him towards the door
out of the hall and into the lobby.
 
As they were about to leave they ran into the director.
“Oh Heel-san you are already leaving?” The director looked half surprised half
disappointed.
“I’m just not the type for this sort of get-together besides my sister is tired
since she only arrived this evening.” His voice was cold.
Setsu nodded slightly. “But I can’t just leave Nii-san alone, so since he is
worried he decided to accompany me, because he didn’t want to risk me falling
asleep in here.”
“I see. Well it’s a pity but it can’t be helped I guess.” The director nodded
vaguely and passed them by but turned towards them again for a short moment so
nobody could see the winking before he joined the others again.
As Cain and Setsu closed the door to the hall and stepped into the lobby he
sighed deeply. “Finally!” He exclaimed in a low voice and directly stepped
towards the lifts. They even forgot her luggage.
“Indeed.” Setsu replied sounding both relieved and happy. As soon as the lift
door had closed behind them she wrapped her arms around her brother preventing
him to press a button for a moment.
After he finally managed to press a button he pulled her close to his chest
again. How he had been anticipating it ever since they left for the premiere.
“Setsu...” he said under his breath and stroked her back. That she was here
with him was almost too good to be true.
“Nii-san...” she only replied softly looking up to him affectionately.
 
There he was again craving to kiss these lips of hers, but the arrival of the
lift saved the situation. But just for how long was he able to resist her? He
grabbed her hand and walked towards the door of their room getting the key out
from the pocket of his coat.
“I forgot my suitcase!” Setsu said when he was about to enter the room with her
and turned around to walk back to the lift but was held back by him with gentle
force. “Nii-san?”
“You are hopeless.” He smiled and passed her by back into the hallway while
pushing her into the room. “You wait here. I will fetch it for you. Don’t you
dare falling asleep just yet.” He tried sounding jokingly.
“Alright. I will take a quick shower if you don’t mind.”
“Yeah yeah just go ahead. I’ll be back soon.” He nodded slightly and then left
for fetching her suitcase.
***** Forbidden desires *****
She went inside and closed the door leaning against it for a brief moment.
‘I promised to the president that I will be giving it my all but I have the
impression that it’s still no good. It’s the last act of the Heel Siblings.
Tomorrow after leaving the hotel and meeting up with Muse-san and the president
there is no other chance. There won’t be another sudden reunion and I don’t
want to end this role with the feeling I didn’t give my best.’ Kyoko sighed.
For this short time she was alone she had switched back to her real self to
evaluate the act up to now but she just wasn’t satisfied. With another sigh she
took off the high heels and entered the bath room to take a shower. The
suitcase she brought wasn’t actually a suitcase but a medium-sized bag with
only a few things. But without it she had no change of clothes so she could
only get back into the underwear she had been wearing ever since Muse-san
prepared her for the role. And that was quite embarrassing but then again it
was typically Setsu. Setsu wouldn’t become flustered and embarrassed walking
around in merely a bra, a lacy undershirt and a lacy slip in front of her
brother. In fact it would be totally Setsu teasing him that way.
‘Right! There is still time to give my best. I will do it!’ She thought while
putting the wig back on. She even put the leather collar with the rivets on
again as well as the over-knee fishnet stockings. She closed her eyes and took
a deep breath. Next time she looked at the mirror over the sink Setsu smiled.
This was certainly a view for only her brother to ever behold.
 
After he had entered the lift he reclined against one of the reflective walls
and slid down to the floor without having pressed a button. The door closed and
he was alone with himself rubbing his gloved hands through his face.
‘Another close shave…’
Even though there was this night where she had boldly signed him as hers with
that bite mark and acted rather teasingly after he almost lost control, the
desire to kiss her and to touch her all over had never been so pressing than
tonight. Ren sighed. Kyoko seemed to have been absorbed into the role as Setsu.
It had been more than just a mere surprise when she suddenly popped up again as
Setsu even though the president had called the Heel Sibling Act to an end after
Guam. He suspected that Kyoko was well aware that this was her final chance to
give her everything for this act. But still. Neither as Tsuruga Ren, nor as
Cain Heel he was able to just bear it. In fact Cain was in the same dilemma or
at least a similar. Kyoko was the one he dearly loved – as Tsuruga Ren and as
Kuon, which he had realized after he had kissed her as Kuon in Guam. Maybe
knowing the taste of her lips made it even more complicated to act out the Heel
Siblings accordingly – but then again – what did it mean to act them out
accordingly? He let out another deep sigh and eventually pressed the button for
the lobby before he got up looking at his appearance. Cain Heel was smitten by
his own sister. Setsuka was the same forbidden fruit as Kyoko. There was just
no way both of them could allow something to happen, aside from a little light
affection. There was no way this was healthy. With another deep sigh and a mood
fluctuating between regret and desire he stepped out of the lift to fetch the
luggage of his beloved sister.
 
When he returned with the bag of Setsu she was still in the bathroom.
“I’m back” he said and placed the bag on the foot of her bed and the key on a
sideboard before he took off his coat, threw it over the backrest of a chair
and then took off his boots to lay down on the bed.
“Welcome back. I’m almost ready.”
“Yeah yeah, don’t rush things. I’m not going to run away anytime soon.”
Setsu chuckled and with a last glance into the mirror she turned around and
left the bathroom. Cain was lying there staring at the ceiling. Just from this
short look Setsu could tell that he was sort of tense. He peered over to her
and almost lost complete control of his facials but before he was able to say
something she had crawled onto his bed and came to rest upon him her arms
crossed under her chin looking at his bewildered expression.
“Nii-san seems to be rather tense” she mentioned casually.
He took a deeper breath and went back to staring at the ceiling. Not because
the ceiling was more interesting, but looking at her meant also looking at her
getup. “The evening was rather irritating after all.”
“Is it still irritating now that we are alone?” She cocked her head a little
and then leered at the ceiling. “Is the ceiling that interesting Nii-san?”
He forced himself to look at her as neutral as possible. “No.”
“Geez you are really odd tonight. You don’t even wrap your arms around me for
some cuddling.” She pouted and averted her eyes from him.
“How could I possibly wrap my arms around you when…” he blurted out agitated
but then made a pause before he finished the sentence with a low voice: “when
you are dressed like that…”
“Huhhh? You don’t like it? You have never complained when I have been walking
around like this in the past.” Now she pouted even more straightening up until
she was kneeling over him.
‘Shit. This is going nowhere good’ he thought when he caught a glimpse of her
cleavage and her absolutely cute pouting before he looked to the side again
grinding his teeth a little. “It’s not that…”
“So? What is it then? I’ve been looking forward to this the whole evening.” She
cocked her head again then reaching out one arm placing her warm hand on his
cheek to force him to look at her.
‘Argh! Why does she have to torture me like this…’ He looked at her just as she
desired and reluctantly moved his arms up to place his hands on her back which
was only covered with this thin piece of cloth. He could even feel the band and
fastenings of her bra through this. ‘This is bad. At this rate I will either
anger her, chase her away or…’ A glint of despair flickered in his eyes before
he once again averted them to the side.
She felt that he only reluctantly placed his hands on her back but saw the
glint of despair before he cut eye-contact once again. She laid back down on
him again framing his face with both of her hands and once again forced him to
look at her. “What is it what troubles you so much Nii-san?”
He looked at her for a long time without answering then he suddenly smiled
faintly exhaling in a sigh. “It’s just no good. I am just no good after all.”
“What do you mean? How would you not be any good? You are my most precious
brother.”
“I’m your only brother. You make it sound as if there were more.” He then
suddenly held his breath for a second widening his eyes a little and the next
moment she found herself flung around lying under him his hands clenching into
her shoulder. “Say. Are there other guys?” He shook her a little.
A bit surprised by the sudden change of position she grinned flirtatiously at
him and once again placed her hands around his face. “I don’t need anyone but
Nii-san. You should know that.”
He sat up kneeling in between her legs his arms hanging loosely at his sides
his head turned to the side. He felt guilty and embarrassed for causing such a
scene. Just the mere thought that another man could touch this untainted body
of hers or even dare looking at this sort of getup made him furious.
 
She sat up as well kneeling in front of him her legs slightly spread so she
could move closer so his knees were between her thighs again. “Nii-san. You are
worrying me.”
Once again there was a moment of silence before he turned his head towards her
again looking down into her face which looked as if she was on the verge of
crying. “I didn’t mean to do that it…it just happened. Just to think that
anyone else could have seen you like this drives me insane.”
She smiled softly and wrapped her arms around him placing her head onto his
chest. “There is no way I would do that to you. I belong to you and you belong
to me.” She detached herself again a little and placed her lips onto the spot
on his neck where there had once been the bite mark. “This has worn off after
all. It’s just no good.” She straightened up again grabbing his hands. “There
must be a way to mark me as yours and you as mine without a chance of it ever
wearing off.” She looked at him half desperate half hopeful. Her brother had a
bit more experience in these things though she knew he gathered them with other
women. She didn’t care any longer. As long as he was completely hers now it was
okay.
Seeing her like this, feeling her hands clutching at his, his knees faintly
touching her thighs he had a hard time maintaining the little of control that
was left inside of him. “There is but…that, that isn’t something we should be
doing.” He tried to sound serious and convincing but he actually didn’t believe
himself. Actually what he had in mind was what he was craving for, but as long
as he could maintain even a last piece of control then he would cling to it.
“Ehh? What is it? Is it dangerous? I don’t care! Please...Nii-san...” She
clutched at his hands even tighter and sat up a little more so her face was at
the same height as his even a little higher. “You don’t really sound as if it
was that bad you know.”
He looked up into her eyes and saw the anticipation on her face. His lips were
moving slightly but no sound left them. Why did god make her his sister?
 
Since he didn’t speak or act she sunk back into the previous position now
crossing her arms in front of her chest. She glared at him. “Or is it that you
are afraid you might not be able to see other women again?”
He hastily looked at her. “Why would I be afraid of that?” True he had been
seeing other women, but he merely did it to distract his thoughts of her, to
maintain control. But since the start of the shooting for Tragic Marker he
hasn’t had any serious contact with other women – especially not since THAT
night back then.
“Why did you go and see all these women the past years? Apparently, because
there was something about them, that was more important than me.” Sadness
showed in her eyes before she looked to the side.
“No – no it wasn’t like that.” – ‘On the contrary...I did it to protect you
from me...how could I possibly tell her that...’
“Then why is it such an issue? Why won’t you make me yours? Why won’t you even
touch me tonight?” Now she was the one sounding desperate but also a bit angry.
Seeing her agitated like that, he couldn’t help but pulling her into a tight
hug even though his body was trembling while trying to cling to what remained
of his control.
***** Losing control *****
He had never ever wanted a woman as much as her.
Paralyzed by astonishment for a few seconds she didn’t hug him back but then
flung her arms around him and pushed him back so he had no chance but to
stretch out his legs in order not to hurt her. She was back to her clingy self
but he could feel her breasts pressing onto his chest since she hugged him so
tight just as if she was afraid he would vanish in thin air if she ever let go.
Since she had pushed him back she was again sitting on him in a similar fashion
as in THAT night just this time her bottom was resting on his lap. Basically
that wasn’t something special since she was often sitting on his lap even in
public just like a spoiled little sister would do, but tonight he felt
flustered, embarrassed and desperate as there was no way she would be able to
ignore what had been building up within those tight pants of his.
‘Well as long as she doesn’t move it would be okay I guess...’ he thought as he
held her close forcing himself not to start caressing her back as he would have
done if she wasn’t dressed to kill.
Unfortunately he wasn’t very lucky as she soon started moving even though it
was just that she detached herself from him to sit up looking down on him. She
placed her hands on his chest and let her fingers spread out slowly before she
clenched into his shirt as if she wanted to rip it apart. But she didn’t do so.
Actually that moment she slightly noticed how there seemed to be something
faintly pulsing against her bottom. Neither Setsu nor Kyoko could make anything
of it so naturally out of curiosity she rubbed her bottom against it a little.
Of course that increased the pulse a great lot as if there was something
knocking to be set free. At the same time neither Cain nor Ren were able to
suppress the silent moan that accompanied the knocking. As soon as he realized
it though he looked to the side his hands clenched into the blanket.
“Oh? Nii-san does like that?” She slightly moved her bottom in a circle again
and smiled at him half vicious half flirtatious.
He suppressed a second moan but at the price of biting his lower lip and
closing his eyes to regain control. He didn’t answer at first but when he
thought that he felt stable enough to reply he actually even looked at her
seeing her smile. “You just love to torture me a little once in a while, don’t
you?”
“Hmm let me think...” she said and moved a fingertip to her lower lip slightly
leering at the upper right corner for a moment before she bowed down to him
with her lips close to his ear.
Since this movement caused another light rubbing sensation he wasn’t braced for
another silent moan left his lips
“Mhh – maybe just a little” she finally said under her breath and teasingly
touched his earlobe with the tip of her tongue.
 
This was it. He couldn’t bear any more of this. He just couldn’t. If this
continued any further he would seriously lose sanity. So she found herself half
under him again in the next moment his lips close to her ear now. His voice was
faint but there was a hint of desire. “You know...revenge is sweet...” As soon
as his voice had fallen silent she could now also feel the tip of his tongue
touching her earlobe but not enough he even started licking it gently before he
moved a little closer to nibble a bit.
Setsu chuckled but couldn’t fully hide her excitement about what would happen
next. But what he did there was just tickling. “It tickles Nii-san.”
“I see...” he said under his breath after he stopped nibbling but he didn’t
withdraw. He started to place kisses on her neck wandering from her ear down to
where her throat merged with her cleavage before wandering up to her other ear
again to give it the same treatment.
This time it tickled less but caused a light shiver to run down her spine.
“Nii-san seems to be hungry.”
He finished her ear-treatment and his voice was again nothing more but a light
breeze against her ear. “Mhh – I could just eat you up.” He started to caress
her waist with one hand while he once again sent his lips wandering over the
smooth skin of her neck, throat, shoulders and upper cleavage.
“And here I thought you weren’t into sweets that much.” She tried to sound
teasingly, but his caress sent another shiver down her spine so her voice
trembled slightly.
When he had covered every inch of her neck, throat, shoulders and upper
cleavage to the border of where the undershirt covered the bra with kisses he
wandered up her throat over her chin but stopped before reaching her lips. “I
changed my mind...” Before she was able to say anything he covered her lips
with a tender kiss while his hand at her waist finally lifted the hem of the
undershirt to continue caressing on her smooth warm skin. Oh how he had longed
to do this.
 
Indeed she had intended to reply but whatever she was about to say vanished
into thin air as soon as their lips made contact. She finally placed her hands
that had been lying idly on the blanket onto his hips also starting to gently
wander over them and the waist for now, while there was still his shirt between
her fingers and his bare skin. He also felt a light shiver running down his
spine and the kiss, which still lasted, got a bit more intense. Even though she
had no experiences in kissing at all she just went along it trying to not press
her lips onto his too much. As he continued the journey of his fingers over the
naked skin of her waists and her belly while he was holding her with his other
arm he sent more and more shivers down her spine. Since the undershirt was
pretty tight there was no choice but to slide the hem of it up more and more as
his hand closed in to her breasts. He ended the kiss for a brief moment to look
into her face which more and more displayed her excitement.
 
“Tsuruga-san...” she said under her breath and then blushed.
Immediately he stopped dead and stared at her. She was actually aware of what
was happening?
“Tsuruga-san...” she repeated but he eventually placed a finger on her lips.
She closed her eyes.
“Mogami-san I...I don’t know what to say or to do...I...I just caught myself
while being totally absorbed in Cain...” He was about to remove his hand from
under her undershirt when she placed her hand on his preventing him from doing
so.
“Don’t...” she said silently and blushed a bit more. “It....it feels good...”
His eyes widened a little and he could feel his heart racing in his throat.
“Uhm...if Tsuruga-san feels uncomfortable then...” She let go of his hand and
placed it back onto the blanket while her other hand was still unconsciously
caressing his waist and back.
His expression went warm and he softly shook his head. “I just don’t want you
to regret it in the end or...to feel used because I lost myself in a role that
was dangerous from the beginning.”
She smiled back at him, closed her eyes and shook her head slightly. “I – I
just don’t have any experience...”
He moved his hand away from her belly and placed it on her cheek. “Therefore I
am hesitating. You shouldn’t waste something as precious as your purity to
something that was forced on you.”
She opened her eyes again rubbing her cheek into the palm of his hand. “I don’t
feel that it was forced on me. I – I sort of forced it on me on my own if it
can be called force at all. After all I...” She fell silent and bit her lower
lip blushing once again.
“Mh?” He felt a wave of curious excitement coming over him as he looked at her.
“Uhm...” – ‘Why can’t I just say it. This isn’t going anywhere.’
“After all you – you what?” He realized that he was maybe a bit too pushy.
“Sorry I – I didn’t want to sound pushy.”
She took a deep breath and gathered all courage she was able to find within her
heart. “After all Tsuruga-san is the one in my heart.” To underline this
indirect confession she placed both her hands on her heart and closed her eyes
again with an angelic smile.
 
Ren was lost for words. Did she just confess her love to him? It happened that
there was quite a moment of silence so she opened her eyes again to look at him
seeing a rather bewildered expression in his face.
“It’s no good is it?” Her eyes became sad and she was about to detach herself
from him. She felt like she just made a complete fool of herself once again.
He grabbed her and pulled her into a tight hug before she was able to get away
and couldn’t help but to place a kiss on her forehead. “It’s alright. It’s just
too good to be true.” He leaned his forehead against hers.
“Too – too good to be true?”
“Yes. There are no words to describe this happiness, no words but...“ He closed
in on her lips for another kiss but this kiss felt different. It was more like
back in Guam where he had stolen her first kiss as Kuon.
Even though they had already kissed tonight she could also feel the difference.
In fact it reminded her a lot of that magical moment with Corn in Guam, but she
couldn’t understand why. Eventually she flung her arms around his neck and
pulled him closer. The kiss got a little more intense as the tip of his tongue
left wet traces on her lips trying to get her to open her mouth to let him
inside but instead she stuck out her own tongue to imitate what he just did. He
was a little surprised and thought it to be rather cute to try to make up for
her lack of experience that way but he didn’t want to miss this chance either.
Since she didn’t open her lips for him he did for her and then just covered her
tongue with his lips teasingly poking it with his own. To his surprise she
poked back and even moved her tongue a bit further into his mouth apparently
willing to explore. While the kiss was rather careful and playful at first it
became a bit more passionate over time and with some practice before he
eventually ended it.
Her eyes were closed and she kept them closed for another moment before she
opened them slowly smiling at him affectionately. “I am so happy...” she said
softly. “...so happy that I am not rejected again.” She placed her forehead
against his chest for a moment and felt his hand stroking through her hair or
rather through the wig. Because of that she detached herself from him even
though it happened rather reluctantly. But the wig was bothering her all of a
sudden.
“Uhm, would you excuse me for a moment?”
“Sure.” He didn’t want her to feel hemmed so he let go of her even though the
expression of his eyes belied what he just said.
“I’ll be right back” she ensured and got up presenting him another full view on
the teasing getup though it wasn’t on purpose.
***** Ren’s secret *****
She went to the bathroom and after the door closed behind her she leaned
against it not able to stop smiling. But as soon as she looked into the mirror
to remove the wig she felt also a bit embarrassed again because of what she was
wearing. Since she had no waterproof makeup remover she wasn’t able to remove
it, but she at least removed all the Setsu-like things like the riveted collar
and the fishnet stockings. If she had something else she would have also put on
different clothes but since he had already seen her like this it didn’t really
matter anymore.
While Kyoko was in the bathroom Ren stared up to the ceiling wondering about if
he should reveal himself as Kuon or if he should just put on the Tsuruga Ren
wig he had with him. He eventually got up from his bed and moved towards his
own bag and started undressing. Due to the sudden switch out of character the
bulge in his pants was almost gone. To not look dark anymore he got into a
light blue Jeans and a loose white shirt. He decided to go for Kuon so he
carefully removed the Cain Heel wig from his head to reveal his golden blonde
hair. Though it was just dyed due to having dyed his hair to be Tsuruga Ren
this was very close to his natural hair colour. Since Kyoko was in the bathroom
he had to use the wardrobe mirror to remove the contact lenses so also his
green eyes would show up. He was sure that she would react a bit flabbergasted
seeing ‘Corn’ where Tsuruga Ren had been, but he decided to lay back down on
his bed just this time leaning against the heading section so he was able to
look towards the bathroom door.
 
Not long after he had prepared himself the door opened and Kyoko stepped out
immediately stopping staring at him with wide eyes. “Corn!” She needed a moment
to calm down enough to eventually manage to close the door behind her but she
didn’t dare to get closer just yet. Instead she looked around in the room.
“Where did Tsuruga-san go? Or – did you possibly swap places with him this time
instead of just borrowing his voice?”
He laughed with that voice which was definitely the voice of Tsuruga Ren. But
then again it had actually been Tsuruga Ren borrowing the voice of Kuon for all
these years. “Come here” he demanded gently and leaned forward to pat the bed
in front of him.
“First I want to know where Tsuruga-san has gone.” She sounded slightly
distrustful.
He laughed again but then smiled at her softly. “I will tell you if you come
here. I won’t do anything to you.”
Reluctantly she moved towards the bed. She sort of felt like this wasn’t Corn.
It rather felt like some sort of dark entity that was just pretending to be
Corn. It took her a moment to actually climb onto the bed and kneel in front of
him where he patted with her body tension as stiff as a board.
“Thank you. Well – where to start. In fact I should start at the beginning,
shouldn’t I?” He looked at her and noticed her tension. Well he had somewhat
expected something like this to happen.
“Uhm...have it your way...” She clenched her fists on her knees and pressed her
lips onto each other.
“Well the beginning it is then.” He took a medium breath. “21 Years ago I was
born as a child of Hizuri Kuu and Hizuri Julie. They named me Kuon – I guess
when you were little I just couldn’t really pronounce it because I hadn’t
mastered Japanese yet. When we first met I was 10 and was only on a visit there
while my father had a movie production there.” He paused watching Kyoko’s eyes
widening again as if she suddenly became aware of something very important.
“You ain’t a fairy prince then?” Apparently that was the first thing she could
actually think of upon hearing this.
He laughed softly. “Well if you still insist that I am I won’t take this belief
away from you. After all – the fact that you regarded me as something so
special was the reason I befriended you in the first place, well aside from
your cuteness. Back then it just was as if I suddenly had won a little sister
and was finally good for something. When the movie shoot of my father came to
an end I had to leave, but since I didn’t want to destroy what you so firmly
believed in I made up that story of not being able to fly freely – though it
wasn’t totally made up. I honestly felt that I was no good even though I so
badly wanted to follow the footsteps of my father and become a great actor. But
you made me feel special regardless of what I was.”
She listened closely sometimes nodding slightly. Her mind was full of memories
from back then when she went to see Corn whenever she had felt sad and her body
tension loosened with each word of him. All those happy times and how he would
just not talk much about himself and his troubles. It all seemed to make sense
now – she didn’t care if he was a fairy prince or not. He was magical
nevertheless.
“Well I apparently grew up but my path hasn’t been that bright over all this
time. There were actually years full of darkness. I used to be rather a weak
boy who just couldn’t do anything right. In America where I grew up I had a
friend. His name was Rick. He was always there for me, gave me advice and even
gave me a chicken named Brian as a present. I killed him when I was 15.” It was
almost frightening how calm he stayed while talking about these things.
Kyoko stared at him then suddenly started furiously shaking her head like a
child. “No no no! Corn could never kill anyone!” she felt a bit dizzy when she
finally stopped shaking her head so she grabbed hold of it to stop the
rollercoaster.
“Well I did so and I’ve hurt a lot of people. Rick was my best friend in
America. He was a few years older than me and helped me improve to stand up for
myself, but even with this newly discovered self-esteem I wasn’t able to break
into Showbiz to finally escape the shadow of my great and internationally
popular father. I was rejected and fired a lot and due to not being able to
cope with these things a dark side developed and I became pretty ruthless and
violent. Rick always tried to control me, but was only able to keep me from
killing people – well until I killed him.” He paused once again still smiling
softly.
Kyoko just couldn’t believe what he was telling her. That he apparently wasn’t
a fairy and in fact actually was the son of Hizuri Kuu whose son she had been
acting in order to get advice was unbelievable enough, but to imagine that her
cute and gentle Corn got violent and killed someone? That was just like one of
these tales where at first everything seemed sparkly and suddenly darkness and
blood invaded the scene to turn it all scary and upside-down. She just looked
at him somewhat scared, somewhat sad und somewhat disbelieving.
“Did – did you kill Tsuruga-san?”
He raised an eyebrow. “Yes and no. In fact well...just let me continue. You
will understand once the puzzle is finished. Well at least I hope you will.”
She gulped but then nodded. “Okay.”
“Back when I killed Rick he was actually chasing me because I had an argument
with him about the people I had battered so badly that they most likely had to
be taken to hospital. I ran away because I didn’t want to hear anything about
it from him who had advised me to stand up for myself. Actually I didn’t batter
people because it was fun but because they attacked me verbally and made me
lose myself in rage. My father is of Japanese-American, my mother of Russian-
American heritage. So I grew up with English as my main language and Russian
because of my mother, until I was around 8 years of age when my father tried to
convince me to learn Japanese. So during my dark days a lot of guys harassed
and made fun of me because of my three-mixed heritage and each time I lost my
temper and would batter them until Rick came to stop me before I really killed
them in the fit of my rage. Well that one fateful night I had enough of his
lectures and ran away so he ran after me followed by his girlfriend Tina. While
chasing me he didn’t pay attention to anything else so he wouldn’t lose sight
of me and got ran over by a car while his girlfriend was watching. I came to
myself when I heard the accident happen and ran back to find Tina holding Rick
who was already dead and so badly injured, that blood was flowing onto the
street rapidly coming close to me. Tina was shouting at me with tears in her
eyes and cursed me for killing him. When his blood reached the tips of my shoes
I felt like it actually crawled up my legs to devour me. That moment I wanted
nothing more but to exchange my life for his so he and Tina would become
happy.”
He paused once again. While he had been talking he had turned his head towards
the window leaning it against the wall. Now he looked back at her again.
“Back while that car stunt when I almost ran over that boy I was thrown back to
that moment and if you hadn’t called out to me this feeling from back then
would have devoured me and...possibly I would have never woken up from that
nightmare again.”
She was scared. She didn’t actually want to imagine all this but it just
happened with that vivid imagination of hers. She didn’t want to hear any more
of this but she couldn’t say a word. So this was the curse Corn had hinted on
when she had met him in Guam.
‘He actually didn’t kill his friend. It was an unfortunate accident, but he
felt guilty since if he hadn’t run away Rick wouldn’t have had that accident.
So sad...’
 
Her expression changed to sadness and she jumped at him and hugged him tight.
“You… you didn’t kill anyone! It – it was an accident!” She sounded as if she
was on the verge of crying.
Since he did not expect such a sudden action he was stunned for e few moments
especially when hearing what she was exclaiming. So he finally wrapped his arms
around her and placed his forehead on her shoulder smiling. “I appreciate your
effort of trying to convince me, but I have thought it over many times and just
always came to the same conclusion. If I hadn’t run away he wouldn’t have had
to chase me thus the accident wouldn’t have happened.”
She leeched on to him again furiously shaking her head while it was resting
against his shoulder. Eventually she detached herself a little and gently
placed her hands around his face again looking at him with a smile but teary
eyes. “I am sure he has already forgiven you since you have been regretting and
feeling guilty for so long. It’s just about enough. Don’t torture yourself
anymore.”
He looked at her face slightly shocked and listened to her desperate effort to
put this matter to rest and though he had sworn to Rick and himself he would
atone for what happened forever her words slowly lifted what was left of this
burden on his heart.
“You – you do not have to forget but – but there is no need to let it bind you
down any longer. Even though you may disagree I believe with all my heart that
you are finally allowed to be happy.” She then buried her head between his neck
and his shoulder so he could feel her warm tears on his skin.
 
Her words echoed in his mind. She was totally right. This girl was after all
the one he entrusted his heart to. It suddenly came to him, that there was a
reason for not being able to become happy in the past. There was no way he
could become happy if his heart was already belonging to someone. He just
realized, that from the moment he had parted from little Kyoko back then, or
even earlier, he had entrusted his heart to her. He felt so incredibly stupid
for not realizing this earlier but then it actually made him feel happy,
because she was here with him. But there was still a part of his story left to
tell and he was curious how she would actually react when she realized, that
the fairy prince Corn she’s been holding so dearly in her heart was the same
person as the Senpai she apparently had begun to also love dearly despite
having sworn to never fall in love again. This fact actually made him feel even
more special.
 
He held her for a little while longer and waited until the trembling of her
crying had almost subsided before he detached her from him. He smiled gently
and wiped away the remaining tears on her face. “Thank you Kyoko-chan. Your
magic has truly helped to finally lift this burden off my heart, but there is
still one more thing there is to my story. I guess this part will also answer
your question about the whereabouts of Tsuruga Ren.”
She sniffed a little but slowly curled her lips into a smile. She went back
kneeling in front of him but a lot closer than before. “Al-alright. You know he
is very important to me.”
He smiled a bit more. “I know.” He paused for a moment to muse about how he
could build the bridge between that fateful night and him being taken in by
Lory.
He noticed that she was now watching him rather expectantly so he just began to
speak. The words would come to him as he went just like improvising with the
difference that there was actually a script this time.
“Due to my ruthless and violent behaviour back then I had grown distant from my
parents. Most of the time I lived with Rick in an old house but after that
night I just couldn’t go back there so I wandered around feeling more dead than
alive. Like that I ran into Takarada Lory, a close friend of my father from the
showbiz world, who offered to take me in and to take me away from America back
to Japan to help me with my past ambitions of succeeding my father in acting.
When I left with him my mother wasn’t home due to work so she apparently
developed a slight grudge against my father for handing me over to Lory. She
didn’t speak to him for almost six months. At least that is what I have heard.
When Lory took me in he was fully aware of my dark side but since I didn’t want
anyone to know and hated myself deeply I decided to take up a stage name or
rather more a role that would work as a cover for all the things I didn’t want
anyone to know about.” He paused to watch her eyes widening again. He guessed
that she was about to put two and two together.
“That stage name was…“ she started, but he placed a finger on her lips and
nodded slightly.
“Tsuruga Ren.” He felt another burden vanishing from his shoulders. He had
finally confessed all this to her. Finally there were no more secrets. “I
needed Tsuruga Ren to become everything I always wanted to be, but from the
moment I started realizing that you were the little girl from back then, I also
realized that Tsuruga Ren was the one who succeeded my father not Hizuri Kuon,
plus that I had covered not only the dark days of my past but also buried the
things that I should have kept in my heart.”
Even though she had already realized it, when he actually confirmed that his
stage name was Tsuruga Ren, her eyes grew even wider as he spoke and she
couldn’t help but to cover her mouth with her hands in a mix of astonishment,
awe and slight confusion. Her childhood fairy prince was actually the same
person as the man she loved. After Corn had stolen her first kiss in Guam she
had been confused. She loved Ren but at the same time she felt like she loved
Corn too and now this.
He continued smiling gently and gave her some time to digest this confession
before he once again began to speak:
“Ever since that day in Guam I made up my mind to confess this to you. Now that
this burden is finally lifted from my shoulders I think I should also share
this piece of information with Yashiro-san. I want to go back being Kuon
outside of my acting career – for the time being that is. I need to get used to
this decision myself for a little before I will cast Tsuruga Ren away
completely. Unless…” He reached out his hand and stroked through her hair.
“...unless you want me to stay Tsuruga Ren.”
 
At first she still stared at him looking as if she didn’t know what to do. At
least she had lowered her hands onto her lap so she could feel how the hand
that stroked through her hair slowly wandered down towards her cheek. As his
fingers reached her cheek she closed her eyes and lifted her hand up to place
it over his and then gently rub her cheek against the palm of his hand. Her
previously unbelieving kind of expression grew into a content and loving smile.
There was no reply from her but seeing her like that and feeling her hand
against the back and her cheek against the palm of his hand he assumed, that
she was calming down and starting to accept and possibly even to like the fact,
that he was both Kuon and Ren. His heart almost skipped a beat when she
eventually opened her eyes again looking at him with the most affectionate
expression he had ever seen on the face of a woman. It made his heart overflow
with love and mirrored the same affection on his face only seconds later. He
couldn’t help but to pull her into a tight hug again. She willingly let it
happen and also wrapped her arms around his waists tenderly.
***** Insecurities *****
There was no need for words in this moment, but eventually this moment of
overflowing affection came to an end when she detached herself from him a
little to look up into his bright green eyes.
“I am happy…” she said softly and smiled again before she completely detached
herself from him and moved back to get a better view of him. “To be honest…”
she started and then blushed apparently feeling a bit embarrassed. “After Guam
I was confused. I was so sure that it was Tsuruga-san I was in love with, but
after that day of my reunion with Corn especially after…this…” She looked at
him with a shy smile and the blush on her cheeks to then move two fingers up to
her lips hinting that she was talking about the kiss he had stolen from her “…I
thought that I might as well be in love with Corn and I didn’t know how that
could be possible. After having been dumped by Sho I was so determined to not
meddle with love anymore and when I finally came to realize that I had after
all fallen in love with Tsuruga-san it was already sort of hard to accept. So I
couldn’t possibly love two men at the same time could I?” She laughed shyly.
“However, now that I have learned about all this I feel happy. I feel happy
that I do not have to split my heart in two so each of you would have at least
half of it.”
He felt a slight wave of envy coming up even though it was silly. Eventually he
even had to laugh about it.
She raised an eyebrow and cocked her head. “Is it that silly?”
“Ah, no, sorry, actually I am laughing at my own silliness.” He lifted his hand
and rubbed his neck.
“Why would you be silly?”
“Well, when you said that just now I was envious of myself. I mean – what would
I have done as Tsuruga Ren if Corn actually was a different person?” He laughed
again.
“Oh ehh...” She blushed again and looked down onto her knees. She hadn’t
thought about that when she had told him what had been confusing her.
He lifted her chin and smiled. “It’s okay. It was silly after all.”
 
There was a moment of silence following where they were just looking at each
other before he eventually cleared his throat a bit. “Sooo... have you already
decided who you prefer me to be?”
She shook her head but smiled. “If Corn wants to be Corn then it’s Corn for me
too. If Corn however wants to be both Tsuruga Ren and Corn then I will try to
not confuse them in certain situations since...well. You said you want to keep
being Tsuruga Ren as an actor, but want to live as Corn when not working at
least for the time being.”
“Yes.”
“Well. If we were together then – wouldn’t it be strange? I mean we’d sort of
be together as Kyoko and Tsuruga Ren and as Kyoko and Corn. That would be odd
wouldn’t it? Since people would think I am cheating on you.”
“Hmm. That indeed is something I haven’t thought through enough it seems. After
all this decision to go back being Kuon is also something new to me because I
have denied that part of me for so long. But I certainly can see the problem.
Hmm.”
“Hmm...” She moved her finger up to her lip thinking, her other arm crossed
under her breasts. She apparently tried to find a solution. Since she was
inexperienced and had forgotten about what she was wearing she naturally wasn’t
aware about how sexy she was looking like that.
Kuon instead was experienced enough and a guy to boot. In addition she was the
one he loved which made what he saw even harder to not enjoy.
“Ahh it’s just no good I can’t think of anything.” She pouted at herself and
then noticed the expression on his face. Actually he looked like he was totally
lost in thought but then again his eyes were fixated on her. She at first
cocked her head slowly but then looked down her body eventually being reminded
what she was wearing. “Ugh...” She went almost beet-red in the face and
suddenly crossed her arms in front of her breast and pressed her legs together.
 
In fact he hadn’t been absent at all but she apparently had noticed that he
appreciated what he saw. “It suits you very well.”
“Eh?” She stared at him. “What do you mean?”
“Well that lingerie apparently.”
‘Ugh so blunt...so not fairy-like...’ She frowned slightly expecting that
emperor-of-the-night-smile again but his smile was still gentle.
“Uhm...uhu...err...”
He chuckled slightly. “You are just too cute.”
“Uhm...” She could feel the heat in her face. She was afraid she might explode
and looked down and away from him so her overly red face wasn’t all too
visible.
He moved closer to her and just wrapped his arms around her gently placing his
chin on her head. “Sorry I...shouldn’t have put it so bluntly.”
“Eh...eh it’s... it’s alright... I think...ehhhh....” She bit her lower lip and
then lifted her head up. “It’s still no good is it?”
“Hm?” He raised an eyebrow.
“Well I - I actually didn’t want to be like that anymore. I thought that I had
grown out of my childish ways.” She was about to look down again but he
prevented her from doing so by placing a finger under her chin and then a kiss
on her lips.
“It’s true, that you still act childish in some ways but...” He chuckled. “That
actually makes you even more endearing. I like your rather grown-up ways of
thinking and acting, but if it wasn’t for your childish ways you might have
never held me so dearly in your heart all these years ever since I parted with
you back then.”
“Eh but still...it’s just that...wearing such stuff is...uhm not like me. There
was just no time to put on something else.”
“It’s still suiting you well, but if you want you can put on something else if
it makes you feel more comfortable.”
“It...it’s just that – that I feel sort of frivolous.”
“Well I admit that isn’t something a girl like you would be wearing totally
carefree but I guess in the end I daresay it’s just a matter of habit if one
feels comfortable or not. And I’d be a fool if I wouldn’t appreciate if the
woman I love is dressed like that even though it is just due to a previous
act.”
“Hmm. I mean it – it’s not that I think it doesn’t suit me it’s just...I don’t
know. It’s embarrassing. I don’t want Corn to think that I am that type of
girl.”
“I don’t think you are. If you were then we wouldn’t be here like this.” He
moved up her chin again and smiled. “I am sorry if my honesty makes you feel
uncomfortable.”
“Ah no I just – I just don’t know what to say. After all – you have a lot of
experience with women, don’t you?”
“Eh I admit I had quite a few relationships but they never went very well and
never lasted very long because I just couldn’t bring myself to really love
those women. But yes – I still got some spare experience from the past. But I
also have to admit, that I have no experience at all in being in love. Being in
love makes the whole matter a lot more complicated but also more fulfilling I
think.”
She looked up to him and felt a wave of awe come over her. “Oh so this is sort
of new to Corn as well then?”
“Sort of, yes.”
“Still...” She hummed and hawed a little biting her lower lip again as she felt
embarrassed again to actually say it.
“Still?”
“Uhm...what you did tonight...well...it...it felt good.” Quickly she moved her
head down again and looked down on her knees.
 
For some reason that even made him blush a little and for a moment he didn’t
know what to say.
‘Does that mean she wants more of it or was it just a statement?’ He gulped
very lightly and reluctantly reached out a hand to place it on her shoulder and
to caress it a little.
He hadn’t felt that insecure about this stuff since the first few times he had
touched a girl. She of course felt his fingers on her skin but also, that it
felt pretty reluctant, so she slowly looked up to his face and noticed she
blush on his cheeks. Their eyes met and he immediately withdrew his hand and
blushed a bit more.
“Sorry...I...ehh...” He fell silent and felt totally stupid.
She smiled a bit. So he apparently also felt insecure. “Ah no it’s my fault. I
shouldn’t have said that after all.”
He looked back at her and shook his head. “No I – I’m just not sure how you
meant it and...” He rubbed his neck again in a light wave of embarrassment.
“Damn I feel totally stupid – like back in those days when I had no experience
at all...”
“Ehh well, it’s sort of good isn’t it?”
“Huh? How is that good?” He gave her a surprised look.
“Well it’s like a fresh start I think.”
“I guess it could be put like that but then again it’s not quite like that at
all.”
“So?”
He took her hands. “It’s just that you are such a delicate flower and I’m
afraid I might accidently damage your petals while feeling over them.”
‘Uhhh that sounded soo cool, even though it has something frivolous to it.’
Even though she thought she understood she rather looked like she actually
didn’t.
‘Maybe I should have expressed it differently after all.’ He took a deeper
breath. “What I mean is...” He held her hands a bit more firmly. “Since you
don’t have any experience at all, aside from what you may have seen in movies,
I don’t want to scare you away with rash actions. It’s just that I understand
that I can’t force my desires on you – don’t want to either.” It felt odd to
have this sort of conversation.
“I see, yet it felt good and – well why would I be scared away by something
that feels good?”
“Uhm – well I am male after all.” – ‘Well if that didn’t sound trite...’
“Ehhhh....”
‘Just the kind of reaction I expected...’
There was a long silence since neither of them knew what to say or what to do
but eventually she started shivering a little because the hotel room had become
quite chilly over time and the signs of her being cold also showed on her body.
Her skin was covered in slight goose bumps and of course the chill also made
her nipples define clearly under the thin fabric of the undershirt and the bra.
When he peered over to her he noticed the goose bumps but also the other
effect. In fact it was hard not to notice.
***** Curtain of the night *****
“Are you cold?”
“Eh yes it has become a bit chilly in here.”
Well they had been sitting here for quite some time. It was most likely already
way behind midnight or even later, so the radiator was regulated down for the
night. He straightened up and left the bed to then grab the blanket and pull it
softly so she would either also leave the bed or at least make it possible to
move it away from under her. She did the second so he was able to pick up the
blanket and then come back onto bed again to lay down and pat beside him. While
she was crawling over to the head of bed he spread the blanket so he was able
to cover them both as soon as she was lying. Since it was a single bed they had
to move closer to each other in the end just cuddling up.
“Is it getting warmer already” he asked softly his head close to her ear while
holding her.
“Yes. Corn feels very warm.”
She sounded like she appreciated the situation a lot and since she was still
calling him Corn she apparently had decided to call him Corn instead of Ren.
Even though it was still sort of funny that she said Corn and not Kuon but then
again that was something only she did – something that was special and in fact
he didn’t really mind.
“You really seem to enjoy it.”
“Yes it feels good.”
“Good.” He just held her like that for a few moments waiting for the goose
bumps and her shivering to subside before he detached himself just enough to
look into her face.
She had her eyes closed and a very content and angelic smile on her face. She
in fact looked as if she was sleeping so he just couldn’t resist placing a kiss
on those tender lips, but was surprised when she actually kissed back and
squinted at him with bedroom eyes after it had ended.
‘That look – and she is absolutely clueless about what this can do to men.’
Hesitantly he placed a finger on her lips and traced them before the finger
slowly trailed down her chin towards her throat.
 
She closed her eyes again and just let it happen. She didn’t seem to be
embarrassed anymore. He hesitated for a second before he continued trailing his
finger over the soft skin of her throat making a slight curve to the direction
of a shoulder when he reached the point where the throat merged with the chest.
While doing so he examined her facials closely he didn’t want to miss any sign
of either pleasure or discomfort. But for the time being she seemed to enjoy it
quite a bit as she went back to that content angelic smile. So his finger
continued trailing and brushing over her collarbone slowly sliding down the
straps of her undershirt and her bra then went back to the collarbone and up to
her neck. From there he brushed softly over her shoulder and her upper arm
before wandering down to her bladebone. She felt a slight shiver running down
her spine but this time not from coldness. She didn’t say anything though,
because she was afraid he might withdraw when it actually started to feel good
again.
Finally even her hands started moving. One gently went up and down his upper
back and shoulder girdle, the other caressed his waist and partly his lower
back. He couldn’t help but to let out a barely audacious sigh of appreciation.
She heard it anyways and stopped in the middle of movement. He instead didn’t
stop to caress harmless areas of her upper body mainly focusing on her
shoulders, collarbones and upper back as well as neck.
“Don’t stop” he said under his breath and let out another barely audible sigh
of appreciation as she continued.
She squinted again with bedroom eyes and noticed that he was looking at her so
she fully opened her eyes looking at him too. “Uhm...is – is it any good?”
He nodded slightly and smiled. “Yes.”
“O-Okay...” She blushed slightly and closed her eyes again.
 
As he started to caress her upper back and also trail and brush over her spine
another shiver ran down it and he was even able to feel it because of the
gooseflesh. She even bit her lower lip. Having quite some experience with women
he knew that she was enjoying his caress so he continued now letting his other
hand also start stroking her waist and her belly. At first just with the fabric
in between his fingers and her skin but eventually he slightly lifted the hem
and brushed his fingers over her naked skin. A light sigh left her lips and she
once again opened her eyes slightly, to then pull him closer for a kiss. He
just gladly let it happen. While the kiss was soft and tender in the beginning
he soon took the lead to change it so something playful while still being
gentle before he eventually stuck out the tip of his tongue and traced her lips
with it. While kissing he didn’t stop to caress her.
Due to her lack of kissing experience despite having exchanged quite a few
kisses with him tonight, she tried to just copy what he did until she could
feel his tongue on her lips. She slightly opened them to poke his tongue with
hers. After a few pokes back and forth he pushed her tongue back into her mouth
with gentle force just to let his own follow inside and play hide and seek or
try to convince her to play tag. The longer the kiss lasted the more passionate
it became. Despite her lack of experience it felt like heaven to him.
Unconsciously he slid her undershirt up a bit more to explore more of her waist
and belly and also her lower back with his fingers.
Feeling the kiss becoming more passionate she felt a tingling warm sensation
slowly pulsing within her body. She also unconsciously lifted the hem of his
loose shirt and went on caressing his warm, naked skin. Since her arms weren’t
as long as his and since he was taller than her she wasn’t able to reach very
far so she just went with his waist, a part of his belly and in the upper
region with his neck, shoulders and upper back. When he explored her lower back
she sighed moderately into the kiss twitching slightly feeling the pulsing of
the warm tingling sensation increasing. Eventually he ended the kiss only to
let his lips wander down her chin and throat again. She even tilted her head
back a little so he had more room. Slowly he pushed her down on the bed without
stopping to spread kisses wherever there was naked skin in the area of her
upper chest. He bend over her and since he couldn’t reach her back anymore he
focused his caress on her waists, hips and belly still only with his hand for
the time being. The moderate sighs she let out from time to time encouraged him
to continue but also fuelled his own arousal as he went on. He could feel her
delicate fingers dancing on the naked skin of his back his shirt half slid up
until her hands changed direction and wandered towards his waists and then up
his chest.
Since the shirt was loose she didn’t even need to fully push it up to be able
to wander all the way up to his collarbones. Tenderly she traced over them and
then down his breastbone towards his belly. Playfully her finger circled around
his belly button until she eventually began to unbutton the shirt from bottom
to top. He couldn’t suppress the moderate sigh escaping from his lips followed
by a slight gasping. She absolutely had no idea what she was doing there, or
did she? He paused caressing her as she had unbuttoned the shirt and intended
to just slide it off so he straightened up looking down on her noticing a faint
expression of upcoming arousal on her face before she opened her eyes and got
up to free him from she shirt. He took this chance to finally remove that thin
piece of lacy fabric that was still somewhat covering her upper body and to his
surprise she didn’t intervene. More so, after the undershirt was gone, she
brought herself into a kneeling position in front of him so her head was almost
on the same level as his maybe a bit higher. He was excited since he did not
know what she intended to do but he didn’t want to just sit there idly either.
When she moved closer he placed both his hands on her waist and leaned forward
to kiss her again letting his handy freely wander over every inch of uncovered
skin between the waistband of her slip and her throat excluding her breasts
since they were still covered with the bra.
Actually she had planned to try to give him something back. It felt so good so
she thought he might be happy if she could make him feel good as well. She was
sort of aware of what they were doing and had a vague idea of what this
tingling warm sensation was that was pulsing through her body gently but
actually she didn’t even want to think too much she just wanted to cherish the
moment and to delve into the depths of her feelings for him. When she felt his
hands all over her front and back again she couldn’t help but sigh again in
appreciation her arms loosely crossed behind his neck.
“Corn…” she murmured under her breath and gasped faintly. Her voice was also
starting to express the arousal that was slowly building up in her sending
pulses and waves of pleasure over her skin wherever he touched.
He paused a moment and looked at her not able to hide his own arousal that was
mirrored within his green eyes. “Yes?” His voice also revealed a light amount
of arousal.
Since he was more experienced and since he was male building up arousal didn’t
take that long. But he was still somewhat in control and even if it would mean
a certain kind of torture to him if she suddenly said she didn’t want to go any
further he would obey.
She bit her lower lip blushing a bit. Actually there wasn’t anything special
she wanted to say, she just felt the urge to say his name so she eventually
shook her head slightly and placed her lips on his to then push him onto the
bed with gentle force. She crawled closer one leg between his and the other on
the outside her hands and forearms resting left and right beside his head to
not lose balance. To not interrupt the kiss he followed her unspoken order but
kept his hand on her waist so she wouldn’t just fall on him.
 
The kiss lasted for a little while starting out like nothing more but a light
breeze ending in a similar play of tongues like earlier. Meanwhile he resumed
his caress on her back before she detached her lips from his lettings them
wander all over his face before trailing towards an ear. He moved around his
head according to the direction she chose just like she had done before so it
was easy for her to tease his earlobe. She basically just copied whatever he
had done with her just with some slight variation. Feeling her lips, the tip of
her tongue and her teeth there caused a faint moan to escape his mouth. Even
though she felt insecure whether what she did was any good she continued
trailing over to the other side kissing across his throat then repeating what
she just did with the other ear. Again he let out a faint moan and his fingers
unconsciously clenched into the skin of her back a little.
She stopped immediately as he felt his fingers clenching and supported herself
on both hands while looking down on him. “Sorry…” she whispered.
He opened his eyes and smiled shaking his head slightly. “I’m alright. Please
continue if you want.”
“Uhm but…” She bit her lower lip and turner her head away in a wave of
insecurity.
He moved a hand up to her head and face and gently forced her to look at him
again. “It’s okay. Really.”
“Uhh…it’s just I – I want to also make Corn feel good and – and I think I’m no
good at all…” She sounded as if she was going to cry the next moment so he also
moved the other hand up to her face framing her cheeks. “I feel good. I haven’t
felt this good in a long time.”
“Honestly?”
“Honestly.”
 
She smiled and lifted one hand up to her face and gently touched one of his
hands stroking it a little closing her eyes while doing so before she let her
fingers wander down his arm until she reached his shoulder. When she squinted
she noticed he had closed his eyes again so she resumed her caresses where she
left of just without teasing his ear but instead spreading kisses all over his
skin down towards the collarbone. When every inch of his shoulders, throat and
collarbone areas were covered with kisses and playful licks she continued down
his breastbone even though he had never went deeper with his head than her
cleavage. She just assumed that it was because there had been something in
between blocking the way. Since the way down to his belly was unobstructed she
just took the chance. Still slightly supporting herself to keep the balance she
tried to include some light stroking with her hands over the areas that had
been covered in kisses already changing her hands depending on which side gave
her more support as she worked herself down towards the waistband of his Jeans.
He couldn’t help to let out moderate sighs of pleasure from time to time. While
one arm reached for her head to stroke her neck, cheeks or through her hair the
other one was placed angled beside his head. When she closed in to his belly
and especially belly button he inhaled a bit deeper biting his lower lip
turning his head toward his arm slightly biting into the joint of his index.
This way he tried to suppress the quiet moaning that he felt building up in his
throat but in the end wasn’t able to. He felt her lips and tongue circling
around his belly button for a moment before she worked herself up towards his
head again. His breath had become heavier already and when she closed in to his
head he turned it towards her again squinting at her. Now he was the one with
bedroom eyes. She ended her exploration in a gentle kiss and then rested her
head in the hollow of his shoulder and her body on his. He wrapped his arms
around her placing a kiss on her head starting to move his hands in a stroking
manner again now and again playing with the fastening belt of her bra. Since
one of her legs was still between his she once again felt that pulsing
something knocking against the fabric of the jeans even though it was more
faintly since the fabric of the jeans was a bit sturdier in that area compared
to the pants he had been wearing as Cain. Still she noticed and rubbed her
thigh against it carefully causing him to let out a sudden moderate moan
including a slight twitch of his loins.
She once again immediately stopped and even sat up. “Ah sorry….I…I was
just…curious…” She felt flustered and looked away.
He inhaled but his breath was trembling with excitement a little and sat up
reaching for her to then slowly push her over back onto the bed so she was
under him again. “Relax” he said softly and then blushed a little again. “After
all that is something I can’t prevent from happening even if I wanted. It was
inevitable that you would find out sooner or later.”
She turned her head towards him again. “So I didn’t hurt you there?”
He shook his head.
“You would let me know if I did, wouldn’t you?”
He nodded and smiled.
She smiled as well but still looked somewhat flustered.
He lowered his head into the hollow of her shoulder and started to lick from
there towards her throat before he lightly blew over the wet trail.
“Eep” she exclaimed faintly and wiggled a little under him.
He didn’t react to her little exclamation and instead drew another wet trail
with his tongue to then blow over it to again make her wiggle under him.
“Uhh Corn…it…it feels odd and chilly” she pouted slightly sounding rather
childish.
“Is it that bad?”
“Uhm no it’s just…” she bit her lower lip. She wasn’t able to describe what it
made her feel.
“So do you want me to stop?”
“No!” She flung her hand to her mouth for suddenly blurting that out.
He smiled. “Good. I don’t want to stop either but would have done if you wanted
me to.”
“Eh?” She slid her hand down to her cleavage.
“I don’t want to force all this on you after all.”
“You – you don’t. Uhm… I just never felt something like this before.” She went
red again and looked to the side.
He stroked her neck and cheek. “If it’s too much to bear I will stop.” He was
about to really withdraw again but she held him back by quickly grabbing hold
of his shoulders.
“No! Err…uhm…” She let go of him again. “Please don’t – don’t stop.” She then
took his hand that was placed on her cheek and slid it down between her breasts
and pushed it down so he could feel her heart racing against the palm of his
hand.
***** I want you *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
He felt a wave of deep affection arise as he felt her heart beating so fast all
due to what he had done and she looked so happy. Was it really good to
continue? He smiled though his reason and his feelings were chasing each other
in his head. After a while she detached her hand and placed it onto his cheek
and ran it down to his throat gently lingering there for a moment before she
let it wander further down his breastbone towards his belly. She wasn’t looking
at him anymore but followed the movements of her hand with her eyes until her
fingers touched the waistband of his Jeans. She noticed the bulge underneath.
It wasn’t that she didn’t know what it was what seemed to be wanting out there.
When growing up at Sho’s place he sometimes used to watch TV late in the
evening or at night when his parents were occupied in the Ryokan with some sort
of festivity. It was in her late childhood on the verge of becoming a teen
where Sho had been watching a pretty indecent night movie with a beautiful
woman and a handsome guy. She hadn’t been able to sleep properly and stumbled
in on him on her way to the kitchen for some warm milk. She had noticed that
the TV was on and so entered the room at a scene where the woman was currently
undressing the man in front of a lit fireplace. Though it made her go beet-red
she sat down next to Sho, who was totally absorbed in the scene and just
somewhat blankly staring at the TV. Back when she had been defending herself as
Setsu from Kuon’s dark side until he had been able to switch back to Cain she
had been using what she remembered from that movie to tease Cain. But there had
actually been more to this movie. After the woman had removed the man’s shirt
ever so gently she had knelt down before him and opened his pants to reveal the
underpants which had been showing a bulge. When the pants had been slid down by
the woman she placed her hands on that bulge and stroked it. If Sho’s mother
wouldn’t have suddenly barged in on them totally freaking out about what they
were doing there she might have remembered what that action caused to the man.
But due to the loud voices of Sho’s mother she didn’t really pay attention and
the TV was switched off by her soon anyways.
So now she was in a similar situation like that woman in the movie back then
she was curious. When she had rubbed her thigh against the bulge he had let out
noises that were sounding as if he was in pain. He had assured here she didn’t
hurt him so now she wanted to know for sure. Of course she knew WHAT was
causing the bulge, but she had never actually seen it like that basically she
hadn’t even seen it in reality at all. Back when she had barged into the
bathroom as Setsu when Cain had been taking a shower for ages she had been so
startled that she didn’t take a look.
 
He noticed how she lingered at his waistband with her fingers while obviously
being far away with her thoughts. “Kyoko?”
Hearing her name she hastily looked up at him. “Eh yes. I remembered something
from long ago.”
“Oh? About us?”
“No. It’s was a memory of a movie at night that I had partly watched when I was
on the verge of leaving childhood behind and becoming a teen.” She blushed and
looked down on her hand again that was still lingering at the waistband of his
Jeans. Practically that was hinting on that said movie hadn’t been just a
random movie.
“You watch those kinds of movies at that age?” He was seriously surprised or
maybe even a little disappointed.
“Actually I had been on my way to the kitchen at for some warm milk while Sho’s
parents were occupied with a festivity at the Ryokan. And when I passed by the
living room I noticed the TV running and went in and...well...I didn’t see much
of it though.”
“So?”
“His mother suddenly barged in on us and told us off and switched off the TV.”
She laughed a little.
He smiled. “Good. That sort of stuff isn’t for children to watch who should be
in bed at that time of day anyways.”
“Hehehe that is almost exactly what she said back then.” She went on chuckling
for another moment before she focused on her hand again. “That is why...why I
want to know...” She also moved her second hand to his waistband and hesitantly
started to unbutton the Jeans.
“You want to kno...” He fell silent the moment she fumbled around his jeans
button. He couldn’t do much more but stare at her as she had completely ran him
over.
After unbuttoning she also slid down the zipper and then tried to carefully
pull down the Jeans as far as possibly but he suddenly detached himself from
her and sat up looking down on her with a bewildered expression. She looked
back visibly confused.
“Kyoko you....you can’t just do that all of a sudden...” He looked to the side.
“I can’t? Why?” She sounded disappointed.
“Err...well...you only do that when...uhh...”
She looked at him expectantly. “Well?”
He inhaled deeply and closed his eyes for a brief moment before he exhaled
again and looked at her while trying to zip and button his Jeans again but she
had moved them down quite a few inches so that in this position wasn’t possibly
due to the bulge being in the way. “You don’t open the pants of a man
unless...unless you want to sleep with him.” God why did he feel so
embarrassed?
“Oh.” She actually had nothing more to say. She didn’t know that just wanting
to know also included THAT.
“What did you mean when you said you wanted to know?”
“Uhm...” She tipped her index fingers against each other and looked at them.
“His mother barged in while that woman in the movie had slid down the pants of
the man and was stroking over the bulge in his underpants. I didn’t hear his
reaction to it due to Sho’s mother freaking out and switching off the TV. When
I rubbed my thigh against the bulge I felt earlier you sounded as if you were
in pain. You then said you weren’t, so I wanted to know what would happen if I
did it like the woman in that movie.” While telling him all this she continued
tipping her fingertips against each other looking as if she felt super guilty.
“Err...uhh...that is...” He brushed through his hair with his fingers. “Well
she obviously wanted to sleep with him.”
“Hmm maybe she did but maybe she was just curious?”
He didn’t reply but instead closed his eyes again and brushed through his hair
again while inhaling deeply for another time before actually opening his eyes
again bending down to her. “Do...do you want to sleep with me?”
“Ehhh?” She felt flustered again all of a sudden. What kind of question was
that? Her face went brick-red and she looked away from him.
He turned her head towards him again. He was serious. “Well?”
“W-Why do you ask that?” Her voice trembled slightly.
“Because I would want to sleep with you but that isn’t something I can just
decide happening all on my own you know?” He flipped his finger at her nose.
 
If there was any way to turn redder she now did. She opened her mouth to reply
but no sound left her lips so she closed it again.
‘Maybe that was a bit too blunt after all. Ahh this isn’t going anywhere. I
should maybe just stop here after all.’ He was about to withdraw again when she
suddenly grabbed his hand.
She had her loose fist in front of her mouth and was looking to the side. “I –
I have no experience...”
“It’s not important to have experience you just have to be sure about if you
want or if you don’t want. I can only make that decision for myself.”
“Does...does it feel good?”
“Eh?”
“Sleeping with someone you love....does it feel good?”
“Mhh I suppose it does. I can’t tell. After all it has always been you I loved
while I tried loving other girls.”
“So it doesn’t feel good if it’s not done with someone you love?” She peered up
to him cautiously.
He smiled softly but also seemed to look a bit sad. “Well, it sort of does, but
I guess it’s a different kind of feeling good when it happens with someone you
love.”
“I see, then...” She bit her lower lip and eventually sat up as well to reach
out to him with both hands.
“Then?” He didn’t move even though she obviously wanted him to come closer.
Since he didn’t come to her she had come to him, so she angled her legs to the
side and brought herself into a kneeling position, to then overcome the last
inches between them before wrapping her arms around him. “Then I want to find
out – with you.”
He said nothing for a moment but then wrapped his arms around her too. “You
don’t have to force yourself just because I would want.”
She smiled even though he couldn’t see. “I don’t. I admit due to my lack of
experience I don’t really know what to do. I can’t even promise that I’ll be
any good but...”
He silenced her by placing a finger on her lips. “The only thing you need to do
is to let me know if it hurts...”
“You wouldn’t hurt me, would you?” She lifted her head and leaned her forehead
against his.
“I wouldn’t but it might happen when you are nervous.”
“I see then...then I will let you know.”
“Good.” He smiled faintly with closed eyes and began to caress her back again
while they were facing each other in this position.
It was sort of strange to talk this over before actually doing it. He couldn’t
think how to go back to what they had been doing earlier. While he was still
sort of aroused reason had regained control and now he felt incredibly stupid
since he didn’t want to just push her down and be all over her. But possibly
that issue would solve while just being close to her under the blanket once
again, so he detached himself from her and fiddled with the blanket. She
noticed what he seemed to have in mind so she laid down again waiting for him
to come to her.
Chapter End Notes
     Annotations about the japanese phrases:
     A "Ryokan" is a traditional japanese hotel. Bigger Ryokans can
     include an "Onsen" (Hot-Spring Bath) and a restaurant that serves
     traditional japanese food only as well as traditional tea ceremonies.
     From what I was able to gather the Ryokan of Fuwa Sho's parents is
     rather more a restaurant with traditional japanese especially Kyoto
     cuisine also offering tea ceremonies. Ryokans with a sepatare
     restaurant that isn't exclusive to hotel guests are often frequented
     by business people but also by tourists who want to delve into the
     world of japanese tradition.
***** Sheets of desire *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Before he finally came to her he got rid of his Jeans after all, because he saw
no use in buttoning them again when they would be removed again anyways. She
watched him and even though she had wanted to see that she felt flustered and
embarrassed and went all red again, still she didn’t look away. She noticed
that the bulge she had been feeling was a lot smaller all of a sudden but had
not entirely vanished. When he eventually joined her with the blanket he laid
down on top of her once again one leg between hers his head resting on her
chest right under her chin. One hand gently stroked up and down her waist,
while the other rested idly on her shoulder. When he finally came to her she
wrapped her arms around his waist and his strong back and slightly moved her
fingers in a stroking fashion where her hands came to rest. She wondered how
this sleeping with someone you love would actually happen. Not that she was
totally ingenuous. She certainly knew the basics of having sex but since she
never wasted a thought about having it she had no idea how exactly two people
actually ended up having it. So it happened that they were just lying there
more or less idly cuddling for quite a while before she eventually spoke up.
“Uhm…Corn?”
“Hmm?” He lifted his head and looked at her.
“How do people actually end up sleeping with each other?”
“Ehh…well, because they are exited and aroused by either the sole appearance of
someone, because of a certain mood and emotion or because of a lot of physical
contact with that person.” He sort of began to doubt that it really was a good
idea to sleep with her tonight as she didn’t quite seem capable of being able
to get a grasp of it. He felt odd about answering her questions. ‘But I guess I
have to bear with it because she never had anyone to discuss these matters
with, did she?’
“So that tingling, warm sensation that was pulsing within me earlier…”
He nodded slowly. “That was most likely an early stage of starting to feel
aroused.”
“But – I don’t feel it anymore it – it has subsided somehow.” She sounded half
desperate half guilty as if she had lost something very important.
“That is natural. It would be frustrating if that feeling would never subside,
especially for a guy it can be quite uncomfortable.”
“Because of that?” She moved the thigh on which his lap was resting and rubbed
it against it and immediately felt a twitching movement again.
He shivered heavily and gasped moderately placing a hand on her thig to make
her stop moving it. He then nodded feeling unable to actually say something.
“I – I see.” She stopped immediately as he felt his hand on her naked thigh and
bit her lower lip. “Doesn’t it feel good when I do that?”
He blinked at her while blushing a little. “It – It does but –“
“I’m no good eh?”
“Yes, you are. It’s just – I’m afraid I might lose control and ruin it all
because I’m not fully certain that dark Kuon won’t interfere with this.”
“I see but – how are we going to have sex then?”
He gave her a smile but his eyes actually said that he felt pretty helpless.
“To be honest I don’t know. I – I feel like not having any experience at all.
Despite actually knowing what needs to be done I can’t get myself to just do it
because it would feel like I would be all over you all of a sudden. I guess I’m
just not able to meet the high demands I have put on myself regarding these
matters.”
She framed his face with her hands. “It there anything I can do? I mean
when…when touching you -there- isn’t allowed may... – may I touch you anywhere
else?”
He blinked again in surprise. “Of – Of course.” – ‘That girl – always good for
a surprise’
“Well then…” She pushed him away from her gently while at the same time turning
to the side taking him with her so they eventually ended up in the same
position as before just that he was the one under her now.
 
She didn’t say anything further but just gave him a smile and then kissed him.
She sure felt insecure but she wanted him to feel better, to feel good just
like earlier, so she was determined to do whatever she could. Since she didn’t
want to just copy what she had been doing earlier she put some variation into
it including even his arms and hands.
He saw the glint of insecurity within her eyes but then closed his eyes for the
kiss and even kept them close because he began to relax and to feel comfortable
again. It was just like her. She had always tried to cheer him up or make him
feel good and despite never telling her about his troubles in the past she was
able to lift his spirit by just being there spending time with him. He felt a
new wave of deep affection rise up and her lips and fingertips all over him and
so let out seldom sighs of appreciation and pleasure. When she reached the
waistband of his underpants he didn’t exactly stop her since he wanted to know
if she would include that area after all but the next moment he felt her lips
on his thighs. She had just skipped that part. She didn’t get very far though
since he slowly sat up and pulled her into his arms before stealing another
kiss.
 
While kissing she could feel his fingers being all over her skin and she
couldn’t help but slightly sigh into the kiss. She once again felt that
tingling, warm sensation pulsing within her. ‘So this is how it begins…’ She
caressed his back and when the kiss ended felt his lips trailing down her
throat towards her breasts while he firmly wrapped one arm around her waist to
hold her while he moved his other hand up her belly. Another shiver went down
her spine when she felt his kisses extending on the fabric of her bra over one
breast while the hand was tenderly stroking the other. She sighed moderately
slightly clenching into his back as he continued fondling her breast while they
were still covered eventually even including her nipples which made a tremor
run through all her body and a moderate gasp left her lips.
 
He was a little startled for a second when the tremor went through her but
continued caressing her covered bosom while involving her in another passionate
kiss during which he eventually let go of her breasts for a moment to move both
his hands to her upper back to open the bra and then slowly rid her of it. He
could feel her hands that were unsteadily wandering from here to there so he
ended the kiss again to kiss down to her now uncovered bosom. While he was
continuing where he left off he moved one of her hands down his chest towards
the lower region of his body stopping at his belly. He wasn’t sure if she was
able to understand this hint and if she really would move her hand further down
but that was actually what he wanted to signalize. That it was now okay to
touch him there if she wanted.
The sighing and gasping from her side became more frequent though it was rather
quiet. She felt somewhat bad for not being able to do anything in return
because she was so positively overwhelmed about the way he made her feel. When
he moved her hand towards the lower portion of his body but stopped at the
belly she wasn’t sure what to make from it so she just began moving her fingers
around his belly clueless. Eventually she would stop again opening her mouth to
say something but instead just tilted her head back exposing her throat her
back arched as well as she felt of being driven insane. She was so absorbed in
this feeling that she just wasn’t able to think straight and ask him what he
had been wanting when moving her hand to his belly.
‘So she didn’t understand after all…’ It wasn’t that he felt disappointed or
maybe just slightly but the way she was squirming under his caress definitely
made up for it again.
It wasn’t really necessary either that she touched him there. While his mouth
was both gently and passionately taking care of her bosom he slid the hand he
had been guiding her with down between her legs to cautiously rub it against
the thin piece of fabric. He immediately felt the heat coming from below it and
also its dampness. The next sudden tremor that ran through her body paired with
a moderate moan caused his finger to accidently push against her womanhood a
bit tighter what caused her to squirm even more. His breath was heavy as he let
go of her bosom and kissed up her throat while still cautiously rubbing his
hand against the fabric between her legs.
She moaned again slightly noticing that he made his way up her throat tilting
her head back into a position to be able to merge her lips with his once again.
Due to the sudden tremor the hand on his belly had slid down idly resting on
his underpants where she now felt around. Since he wasn’t complaining she
started rubbing against the pulsing bulge and caused him to moderately moan
into the kiss. He had done this earlier back when she had rubbed her thigh
against it and since he said it felt good she continued eventually causing him
to interrupt the kiss.
“Kyoko…” Now he was the one tilting his head back still rubbing his hand
against the fabric of her slip.
“Corn…” she replied quietly her voice steeped in desire.
Hearing her voice like that, made the last bit of reason vanish into thin air.
He let go of her slip and instead used both his arms to turn around with her so
she ended up half under him again. He laid on his side bending over her one of
his legs entangled with hers. He resumed the rubbing between her legs for a
brief moment while nibbling on her earlobe before he eventually moved over her
completely to slide down the thin piece of fabric and to then throw it down to
the floor just like he had done with the rest of the lingerie.
 
Exposed like that she felt embarrassed again and blushed biting into the joint
of her index. “Corn…”
He smiled at her gently even though his face was also displaying his own desire
and lust before he separated her legs and bent down to place a single kiss on
her mound smelling the fragrance of her arousal tempting him. Even though it
was hard he resisted the urge to not only smell but also taste her there he
instead let his lips move all the way up to her bosom again to kiss it all over
and then to kiss her while trying to take off his underpants with one hand
while using the other to support himself and to not lose balance but he was so
excited and nervous that he just couldn’t get it managed so he ended the kiss
to sit up using both hands while not averting his eyes from her.
 
While he was taking off his underpants she watched him even though she still
felt embarrassed. She had never felt like this before and she didn’t want it to
ever end. It was torture and pleasure at the same time.
“Corn...”, she said again with that desire-soaked voice of hers.
Now that his underpants were gone she could see it and got even more nervous.
That was supposed to fit inside her? She suddenly understood why he had asked
her to let him know if it was painful. But didn’t he also say that it could
happen when being overly nervous? She tried to relax. He was experienced and
would know what to do still she reached out her arms because she wanted him in
her arms to help her calm down more.
 
He had been about to come to her again anyways when she reached out, so he
joined her once again lying down beside her with his leg entangled with hers
just now being held by her. He involved her in a kiss again while trailing down
his fingers down her chest and belly again circling around her breasts and her
nipples as well as her belly button before wandering over her mound with one
finger vanishing between her legs and those heated lips down there. Almost
immediately he started to gently rub the fingertip against her pearl. Another
heavy tremor was the result and she moaned into the kiss. The finger rubbed a
few times more before trailing down to where the moisture was coming from and
effortlessly slipped inside. She interrupted the kiss throwing her head back in
a moderate gasp of pleasure. He used this opportunity to fondle her bosom again
with his lips and his tongue while slowly moving over her again. He wanted her
to forget about everything even nervousness. When he had the impression she was
gone with the sensations he brought himself into position and switched from
fondling to kissing.
 
There was no way back anymore. He was already way past the point of no return
and as he easily slipped into her the world around him was eventually fully
gone as well. There were just her and him and the feeling of wanting to stay
merged like this forever. He intertwined their fingers beside her head still
holding on to the kiss as he began to move inside her slowly. After letting the
kiss fade into a mere breathe of touching lips he placed his forehead into the
hollow of her shoulder. His breath was heavy and sometimes disrupted by either
silent moans or sighs.
 
When she finally felt them melting into one being there was no pain, but a deep
feeling, of never wanting to let go of him and this feeling ever again. While
he was pausing she wrapped her arms around him once again and started to clench
her fingers into the skin of his back a little as he started to move. When the
moving became a bit more passionate she threw he head back again. This was a
feeling she would have never been able to imagine or to dream of even if she
would have wanted.
“Corn...”, she exclaimed once more in a low voice steeped with pleasure and
passion.
 
He heard her voice calling his name like that and wanted to be even closer to
her. He wanted to wrap his arms around her and never let go, so he loosened
their fingers and grabbed her to pull her up into a sitting position while
making sure their connection wasn’t undone accidently. He wrapped her legs
around his hips a little and slid into her a bit deeper when wrapping his arms
around her placing his forehead on her shoulder.
When he pulled her up into the hug she wrapped her arms around his neck and
tilted her head to the side to rest it on his for a moment before she felt him
lifting his head to involve her in another passionate kiss. Since there was
only minimal movement of his hips and loins possible she was able to regain
some composure and looked at him after the kiss had faded.
“Corn...” She smiled happily but had tears in her eyes.
“Kyoko...” He smiled back stroking through her hair while kissing away the few
tears that ran down her cheeks.
After another affectionate smile he resumed the movements again by also guiding
her to move her own hips since in this position he was actually in a passive
role.
“Ah Corn – Aishiteru!” She threw her head back again her body trembling
slightly while moving almost automatically.
He placed his forehead back on her shoulder. “Boku mo aishiteimasu...” he said
in a low pleasure-soaked voice under heavy breathing.
When he felt the end drawing near he placed her back onto the sheet again
intertwining their fingers for these last moments on the sheets of desire. When
the journey of the night finally reached its destination he softened both their
moans with another kiss before he sank down on her still breathing heavily his
head resting on her chest.
 
Her heart was racing and she felt sky high for a few moments before a soothing
kind of fatigue made her float down towards earth again. Her heart and breath
calmed down over time and she loosened the grip around his neck instead running
her fingers through his hair. She still noticed how he rolled down next to her
enveloping them both in the blanket, but then the soothing fatigue won her over
and carried her away into sleep leaving a faint smile on her lips.
Chapter End Notes
     Annotations about the japanese phrases:
     "Aishiteru" means "I love you" in japanese BUT you wouldn't just say
     that to the next best guy/girl. Actually Japanese people rarely use
     it and if so they would only ever say it to someone they truly dearly
     love. From what I know some even restrict it to a person who actually
     returns these feelings. So Aishiteru isn't used to first confess your
     love to someone but to later show them, that you really feel a deep
     emotion of love for them from the very bottom of your heart. That is
     why I used it in this chapter because it fitted so much better than
     just a plain "I love you".
     “Boku mo aishiteimasu” Would be the reply a boy/man would give if
     someone they dearly loved said "aishiteru" to them. If a girl/woman
     is replying it would be "Watashi mo" instead of "Boku mo"
***** Back to reality *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
The night was short. When he woke her up in the morning she felt as if she
hadn’t slept at all but she smiled nevertheless.
“Ohayô...” She yawned cutely and stretched her limbs.
“Ohayô hime-chan.” He looked far from well-rested but he smiled back
affectionately.
“Hi-Hime-chan???” Suddenly she was wide awake and blinked at him.
“Yes – well when I am a fairy-prince then you are my princess.” For a moment he
had a childish flickering in his green eyes before he placed a kiss on her
forehead.
She was all smiles all of a sudden and then threw herself at him, almost
pushing him out of the bed in the process, nuzzling into his chest.
“Silent consent huh?” He hugged her lovingly and held her for a while before
poking into her side.
She looked up and nodded still all smiles. “Yes!”
“I’m afraid we can’t stay in bed any longer though. Setsu and Cain are waiting
for us and I think we should both indulge in a shower before we switch back
into character.” He smiled softly.
She paused for a moment drawing a grimace that looked a lot like ‘Meh, I don’t
want to get up mom’ before she eventually sighed and got up from him. “Ah well
there is no help to it.” She kissed him and then got out of bed starting to
pick up her lingerie from the floor. “
While she was doing so he also sat up grabbing his shirt and undershorts which
she handed him, before she got fresh Setsu-style underwear from her bag as well
as a leather pant just stuffing the used lingerie inside before grabbing the
handle of the bathroom door.
“I am first.” She stuck out her tongue and went inside. Before closing the door
she turned around and smiled. “I will hurry.”
 
While taking a shower and preparing for the final moments as Setsu she reviewed
and reflected everything that had been said and done last night and aside from
feeling a pleasant shiver running down her spine she also remembered him
saying, that he wanted to stay Tsuruga Ren in showbiz for the time being. That
brought her back to the question how they were supposed to be together if she
decided for either Tsuruga Ren or for Hizuri Kuon. No matter how she tuned the
situation and his decision she was only able to come to one conclusion, but
since she had to get back into character before leaving the bathroom, she had
to postpone talking to him about this until later. When she had put the wig
back on she closed her eyes for a faint moment before throwing a Setsu-like
smile at the mirror and finally leaving the bathroom.
While she was in the bathroom he also reviewed the latest happenings feeling a
lot more like Kuon then Tsuruga Ren let alone Cain Heel. Aside from his issues
with the Kazuki-role he has never had issues getting into character. Maybe it
was, because the last burden of his dark past had finally been lifted of his
heart and shoulders that he now bridled at becoming the dark Cain Heel again.
When she left the bathroom dressed as Setsu and an expression on her face that
was also displaying Setsu he was at least wearing the Cain-wig again and his
undershorts but had his white shirt lying on the bed. He however said nothing
when looking at her still trying to get back into character. He grabbed Cain’s
clothes and walked towards her.
“Take your time Nii-san”, Setsu said and started to tidy up a little.
“Mhh”, was the only thing he answered before vanishing behind the bathroom
door.
When he returned fully dressed as Cain Heel Setsu was sitting on what had been
meant to be her bed. Both their bags were packed ready to leave.
“Nii-san looks troubled again.” She cocked her head.
“Mhh. Somehow....” he muttered and grabbed both their bags.
She grabbed the room key on the sideboard and linked their arms after they left
the room.
All the way down to the lobby he didn’t say a word and just tried to get into
character. The only advantage of this was that he sort of automatically looked
dark but also a bit gloomy.
“Nii-san what’s the matter? You look gloomy. Are you brooding over something?”
“Tired” he replied sounding rather cold and was about to leave the lift and
step into the lobby but she held him back and the doors closed again. He looked
at her and noticed the worried Kyoko-like expression on her face. He sighed.
“To be honest I haven’t been able to get into character.”
“Oh.” She was a bit lost for words. “Is – is it like back then with Kazuki?”
He shook his head. “It’s more like my real self is bridling at becoming
something dark again so soon after losing the last remains of that burden.”
“I see.” She smiled vaguely. “We only have a few more steps to overcome until
we are outside. We take a taxi and meet up with Muse-san and then it will be
over.” She grabbed his hands and pressed them in an encouraging way.
He sighed deeply and then smiled at her. “Thank you for your support.”
She smiled. “A great actor once told me that I should never let myself or my
circumstances get to me when acting. I have been trying to follow this advice
ever since so I switched into Setsu despite not really feeling like it, despite
having a lot of things on my mind that I want to talk about.”
He felt his heart beating as she shared the advice with him that he had
actually been sharing with her. “That must have been a great actor indeed.” He
inhaled deeply and held his breath for a moment.
“And he still is a great actor.” She went on smiling and pressing his hands.
When he finally exhaled it sounded more like one of these hundred years worth
sighs before he actually smiled at her lovingly.
“It seems even great actors can’t follow their own advice once in a while.” He
tried to smirk jokingly but the serious sound of his voice belied this effort.
“When the lift doors open the next time you will make it. I believe in you and
I am with you. Until the end.” She linked their arms firmly again and turned
towards the lift doors facing them with him before pressing the button to make
them open again.
He inhaled once again closing his eyes hearing the doors open and as he stepped
outside with her he opened his eyes again. He maybe wasn’t fully Cain but even
Cain might change his ways a little after doing things like last night with his
beloved sister. As they were striding towards the revolving doors leading in
and out the hotel after checking out, luckily only the director happened to
stop them on their way.
“Heel-san.” He waved moving towards them quickly.
“Good morning” Ren said since the director was actually the one who came up
with the Actor-X in the first place.
“Good morning” Kyoko said as well.
The director noticed their not so well-rested expressions. “Not enough sleep
even though you left the party early?”
“Eh yeah. Sort of we weren’t able to get a wink of sleep until late at night.”
“I see that is too bad. Anyways...” He came closer. “Thank you again Tsuruga-
san for going along with that Actor-X idea. The premiere has been a huge
success. Your performance of B.J. was just absolutely stunning.”
“I always try to give it my best. Are you going to lift the mystery?”
She director shook his head. “If I ever decide to direct a sequel I would want
you as B.J. once more so I will keep Cain Heel wrapped in mysteries.”
“I see. Well then. We need to depart now. The president and my beautician are
waiting for us. I have some things on my schedule today.”
“Oh I see I see. Then I don’t want to keep you. Sayonara.”
“Bye bye...” Ren said in a Cain-like fashion and turned around after Kyoko had
also said goodbye and then left the hotel with her.
 
Ten-san was a bit shocked seeing Ren and Kyoko tired like that. “Ugh Ren-chan
what the hell did you do last night? You are lucky that you are taken care of
by me otherwise there was no guarantee these shadows under your eyes could be
covered.” She pushed him into the seat but he caught a faint glimpse of the
president who looked like he had a lot of things crossing his mind when the
‘what did you do’-question was popped.
“I apparently didn’t sleep much” he just replied casually.
Kyoko was waiting outside Tan-san’s styling caravan so she didn’t hear what was
being talked about inside otherwise she might have gone brick-red.
“Did something disturbing happen last night?” The president looked over into
Ren’s face showing in the mirror.
“No” was the reply Ren gave and he wasn’t even lying.
“Then you possibly confessed to her eventually?”
“What if?” He still tried sounding casual.
“Well according to your lack of sleep it was either a long confession or
something else happened.”
“There are things that can give you sleepless nights you know.”
“So you want to tell me, that you confessed to her and then both of you were
lying awake half the night?”
“That is what you said.”
“Ren you can’t circumvent me like that.”
Ren sighed but said nothing.
“Fair enough, maybe we shouldn’t be talking about this in here.”
“Maybe...”
 
The talk went on rather casually until Ren left the caravan so Kyoko could go
inside now.
“Do you want me to cover those shadows under your eyes after removing the
Setsu-make-up?” Ten-san looked at Kyoko through the mirror after she had sat
down.
“No it’s okay. There isn’t anything special I will be doing today. Since I’m
not that well-known yet it doesn’t matter if I look tired.” While Ten-san was
removing the make-up she closed her eyes.
“So, Mogami-san, how did the final act of the Heel Siblings go?”
Kyoko twitched faintly. “I guess it went well.” She put a finger on her lips
for a moment to review the act of the siblings until the moment everything went
out of control and couldn’t help but to blush slightly.
Of course the president noticed. “Do you have something you want to tell me
regarding your feelings for Ren?”
“What should I want to tell you? I mean – we already talked about this matter
didn’t we?”
“Last night” he pointed out casually and looked at her through the mirror a
piercing glance within his eyes.
“We apparently couldn’t sleep.” She tried to sound as casual as possible but
felt flustered again all of a sudden. She felt as if the president actually
already knew what had been happening but still she didn’t want to tell him.
Since he tried to sound her out like this she figured that Ren did not tell him
anything as well.
“Well I was able to figure out that much. Was this last act such a disturbing
experience?”
“Eh? Disturbing? How – how would it have been disturbing?”
“Well I don’t know. Ren doesn’t want to tell me either.”
“Ehh well then I’m afraid I can’t tell you either.”
“Did he confess to you?”
She widened her eyes and her heart skipped a beat. Not able to hide the
surprise and the feeling of having been caught pants down she didn’t reply.
Before Lory was able to press on he was interrupted by Ten-san who shoved Kyoko
into a cabin so she could change into her LoveMe-Uniform and then turned around
to him placing a finger on his lips shaking her head with a sweet smile. She
bowed over to his ears and whispered: “There are things that just ain’t your
business darling.”
Only Lory was able to hear her so he sighed in resignation. “Fair enough.
Mogami-san?”
“Ye-Yes?”
“Go home for today and get some rest you have school tomorrow don’t you?”
“Ehh....yes. Thank you.” She left the cabin dressed in her uniform.
“I’m going to call in Ren so we can drive back to the LME headquarter where we
will drop you off.”
“I see. Thank you.” Kyoko then sat on one of the seats and as soon as Ren had
joined them sitting down beside her, the caravan left the current location.
Lory was sitting opposite of them and watched them. Ren was looking out of the
window even though he felt like holding hands with Kyoko. Kyoko had folded her
hands in her lap and was more or less looking down on them as well. From the
information Lory had gathered up to now from between the lines and judging the
way they were behaving right now he knew, that something had happened.
Something with an impact, maybe even what he had been planning all along ever
since he added a sister with a brother-complex to Ren’s role of Cain Heel. So
he eventually leaned back and finally averted his eyes from them with a smile
and also looked out of the window.
Chapter End Notes
     Annotations about the japanese phrases:
     "Ohayô" is the short form for "Ohayô gozaimasu" meaning "Good
     Morning". Leaving out the "gozaimasu" makes it a rather casual
     morning greeting mainly used among friends, relatives, classmates/
     comrades/co-students or good colleagues at work.
     "hime" is the japanese word/title (for) "princess". Using a "chan"
     prefix with it is something you wouldn't do with actual royalty
     unless they are still children. Aside from being an actual title it
     is also used to nickname people you either like a lot (for example a
     father can call his daughter "hime-chan" to spoil her) or someone who
     you admire or who is admired by others. The male equivalent for
     "hime" would be "ouji" meaning "prince"
***** A bright future? *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
After Ren and Kyoko had been dropped at the LME headquarters he accompanied her
to the LoveMe locker room when his mobile rang. He picked up the call.
“Moshi, moshi? – Ah Yashiro-san. – I see. – Yes. That actually is very
convenient for me. – Yes. – Well, to be honest do you by any chance have time
to spare after work tonight? – No. No everything is fine there is just
something we need to talk about that might take a little while longer. – Yes. –
Good. – No. We can decide later. – Yes. – Yes. I will pick you up later then.
Mata na.” He ended the call and smiled to himself as Kyoko already went into
the locker room to change into her school uniform which she had been wearing
yesterday.
When she left the locker room Ren was still there leaning against the wall. She
smiled. “Do you have an appointment now?”
He nodded. “I was going to invite you for breakfast.”
“Oh, but what about Yashiro-san? Didn’t he call just now?”
“My actual appointment for this morning got cancelled so I have some sudden
free time to spare. I will meet with him later.” He went on smiling.
“Oh I see. Then – where did you plan to go?”
“Well we have a good restaurant here don’t we?”
“I see...” she sounded disappointed.
He looked up and down the corridor before he hugged her. “I’m Tsuruga Ren again
after all. It would be odd to see me having breakfast with you in public –
nobody knows about us yet. And since we have been seen together in the LME
restaurant a few times already it will not cause a commotion.”
At first she was happy when he hugged her but while he was talking she became
sad. “I see” she replied trying to sound and act casual. “Then let’s go.” She
was about to set off when he held her back.
“I’m sorry. We can’t just suddenly show up like a happy couple in public. Not
yet. Still I want to spend these last few hours of today with you.”
She sighed and nodded. There they were back to the problem again that she had
been thinking about in the hotel shower. How was she supposed to behave around
him in the future? “I understand with my head but can’t help not feeling it
with my heart.” She sighed again and finally looked up to him. “There is
something we need to discuss maybe we can do so while having breakfast. I have
been thinking about something this morning in the bathroom and now seems to be
the perfect opportunity to talk about it.”
“Well then let’s see if we can get a table that isn’t too close to other
occupied ones.” He walked down the corridor and followed him still feeling the
weight on her heart.
 
They actually managed to get a table far away enough from others to be able to
talk openly.
After ordering breakfast he looked at her seriously. “So, what have you been
dwelling on earlier?”
“Last night you said you wanted to stay Tsuruga Ren for the time being but also
go back to being Corn when in private.” She kept her voice low not wanting to
risk sensitive information seeping out.
“Indeed I said that and I admit I haven’t thought this through enough.”
“Well – I thought it through or at least I tried but in the end came to the
same conclusion.” She tried to look serious instead of sad but in the end it
was something in between.
He forced himself not to take her hand. “What is it?”
“If we happen to publicly live our relationship while you are Tsuruga Ren, then
we won’t be able to act the same while you are Corn. Those who know us might be
thinking that I am cheating on you. The same goes for when we decide to only
live it while you are being Corn.” She fell silent as their breakfast was
served and only resumed talking when the waiter had gone. “Plus it feels heavy
of having to force myself not to live according to my feelings around you
because you are Tsuruga Ren a famous actor and because I am merely an ordinary
girl still trying to make her way towards becoming a good actress. There is no
way Tsuruga Ren could be with a girl in a ridiculous pink uniform or just a
plain unknown girl...” In the end her voice was choked with tears even though
she had been struggling to suppress them.
 
He listened closely feeling a weight on his heart as well while she continued.
When she ended up crying he had to suppress the urge of just pulling her into a
tight hug. Instead he grabbed a roll and cut it open. But from the expression
on his face she was able to tell that he was feeling somewhat desperate.
Eventually he replied.
“It’s true that it’s a complicated situation. It’s just that I want to let
Yashiro-san know about what I told you last night and then...well there is no
way we can keep this from the president for long and I admit that I sort of
need advice in this matter. I don’t know what to do or to say to make you feel
better. I want to continue acting as Tsuruga Ren but I want to start living as
Hizuri Kuon. For the time being we have to act as casual as possible around
each other when being among people who aren’t let in on the matter. I however
intend to see you as Kuon as often as possible and while being alone or among
people who know we can also be close while I am Tsuruga Ren.” While he was
talking he was preparing the role even though he actually didn’t feel hungry.
If it wasn’t for her he wouldn’t have had anything to eat at all. He still
didn’t feel very fond of food.
A trembling sigh came from her as she used the napkin to dry her tears. “I know
all that. I understand it with my head but my heart just doesn’t want to
understand. I have been vowing to myself to never ever meddle with love again
and it was of no use. Back when I was still with Sho I was sure that he knew
what he meant to me and just silently hoped that one day he would confess to me
– but as you know the opposite happened, so I was actually never able to live
out such a feeling before. And now it’s just the same even though my feelings
are actually returned. My reason is at war with my emotions.” She hadn’t
touched her breakfast yet. Instead her hands had clenched into her knees.
He sighed again letting go of the role he had prepared still forcing himself to
not reach out to comfort her. He wasn’t able to comfort her like this, not yet.
“I am truly sorry for this inconvenience. I actually feel similar but I just
can’t do anything about it at the moment. But I give you my word that I will
try to sort this out as soon as possible. Plus I still have to review and
reflect all the things that had been happening last night.”
“That sounds as if you actually regret it.” She looked to the side.
“No. No I don’t regret it but this burden is also hard on me. You are
practically free to do whatever you want since you aren’t that well-known yet.
I can’t do so. I have an image that I have to keep up in public and until I
have thought this over and discussed it with the president and Yashiro-san
there is nothing I can do. But I still want to be happy and if it’s just for a
few moments each day. There will be opportunities I am sure. I want to believe
there are. I want to believe that we can spend time together every day. Lately
I have always been happy just spending time with you though I always longed to
actually hold you, but just to be with you and see you smile made me happy
already.”
She sighed again and nodded slightly trying to smile. “It won’t be easy
though.”
“I know – but we have to bear with it for the time being. It’s not supposed to
last forever.” He smiled faintly as well.
“Hopefully.” Finally she started to pay attention to her roll.
“We won’t be able to see each other tonight though. I have an appointment at a
radio station first and later I’ll be at TBC and afterwards I have an
appointment with Yashiro-san. I want to tell him everything tonight.”
“I see. Well – maybe we can make it tomorrow in the evening.” She didn’t make
it sound like a question on purpose.
“Maybe we can.”
“Are you going to tell him about us too?”
“Only if you want.”
“Well...it’s not like he isn’t already sort of aware, is he?”
“Heh – I guess he somewhat is at least he was always trying to make me date
you.”
“Hahaha – I guess then you should tell him.”
“Okay.”
 
The rest of the breakfast was a bit more cheerful and he was once again seeing
himself confronted with the fact that not eating anything while being with her
was just not a good idea.
“Do you want me to drop you off at the Darumaya” he asked while leaving the
restaurant with her.
She still didn’t feel very comfortable acting all casual around him but she
finally decided to put it to rest for now and just bear with it. “Don’t you
have an appointment with Yashiro-san soon?”
“Yes, but I’m going to pick him up on my way to the radio station and it
happens, that the Darumaya isn’t too much of a detour.”
“I see. Well then I accept.” She followed him down into the parking area and
got into his car.
While the drive they didn’t talk much or about a few trivial things before they
eventually arrived at the Darumaya. He turned off the engine, checked the rear
mirror and also looked out of his window and the windscreen before turning his
head towards her as he felt the final moment of this day lingering between them
like a shadow. He didn’t want to leave her behind like that, so after a short
look out of her window bend over and pulled her into a hug and a kiss. At first
she was a bit ran over but before the moment ended she hugged and kissed back.
When he detached himself from her she had a blush on her cheeks and smiled
almost shyly. “I love you Corn.”
He ran his hand through her face a last time and smiled affectionately. “I love
you too. Get some rest. Don’t turn off your mobile phone.” He winked slightly.
“Oh okay. Then – this is good bye for now?”
“I’m afraid so. Yashiro-san is waiting.”
“Yes, of course.” She got out of the car but looked back in before closing the
door. “See you tomorrow.” She smiled and without waiting for a reply she closed
the door and stepped back.
He started the engine with a last look at her and then drove down the street
out of sight.
When she walked towards the Darumaya’s she smiled. Maybe it was better not to
let the Taichou and Okami-san know about Ren and her for now – not before
everything got sorted out. So she sighed deeply opening the door with a tired
smile.
“Ohayô gozaimasu! Tadaima!”
Chapter End Notes
     Annotations about the japanese phrases:
     "Moshi moshi" is a phrase to answer phone calls in Japan, there isn't
     a real translation to it other than "moshi" being derived from
     "moushi" which means "to talk". So it's basically a way to tell the
     calling person that you are going to talk to them. But you actually
     better only use it when you are familiar or close with who is calling
     you. In business situation or when being called by your teacher or
     another person of respect it's better to use other phrases. There are
     also some spare off-phone-uses for "moshi moshi" for example if you
     are out and someone passes out on the sidewalk you may nudge them
     saying "Moshi moshi" to check if they are still conscious.
     "Mata na" or also "Mata ne" means "See you soon/later" and is rather
     a casual farewell-phrase mostly used among friends and family
     memmbers. Another casual farewell is "ja ne/na" which is a bit closer
     to saying "bye". Formally you would use "Sayônara" to say "Good bye".
     "Taichou" is japanese for "Captain" or "big leader". Sometimes
     employees use it to address their boss. In this case Kyoko refers to
     the owner of Darumaya as "Taichou" because she used to work for them
     and because she respects him a lot.
     "Okami-san" in this case does NOT mean "wolf". Kyoko started calling
     the wife of Taicho Okami-san, because she has always been nice and
     supportive. "Okami-san" in this case is derived from "o kami" which
     is used when calling out to god or when praying.
     "Tadaima" means "I'm back" and is mostly used when you have been away
     from home and return. When you reside elsewhere for example at a
     friend's house for vacation you can also use that. It's the way to
     let others in the house/appartment know that you are there to not
     startle them by suddenly turning up. Usually if someone is there they
     would reply with "Okaeri" meaning "welcome back".
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