Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/160373.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Popslash
  Relationship:
      Aaron_Carter/Nick_Carter
  Character:
      Aaron_Carter, Nick_Carter
  Additional Tags:
      Cartercest
  Stats:
      Published: 2003-11-26 Words: 2273
****** If You Can't Say No ******
by iconis
Summary
     There is a few things Aaron can count on.
It’s been a gruesome week; you barely remember your name when the phone rings
on the exact moment you put the light out and close your eyes. You reach
blindly for the receiver and grunt your hello. The voice on the other end
shakes you out of your haze; the voice quietly greeting you with your name
sounds deeper than last time, just like on every conversation you’ve had with
him lately. But still, his voice sounds small and raw, not like Aaron at all
and you sit up on the bed.
You almost know what it’s all about before he starts explaining it, his hushed
tones tell you he's in a hurry, not really able to talk. He asks you a favor -
you know it'll fuck up your schedule for the entire month but you say yes
anyway. There's nothing you wouldn't do for him. And the kid knows it; his tone
changes totally when he hears your answer, the rawness changes into
playfulness. You know he doesn't do any of it with the intent to manipulate
you, he's just genuinely happy to know he'll see you soon.
You're not sure of many things in your life, in you, but Aaron is one of them.
You know that what ever you do, Aaron will stay with you. He trusts you with
his life, you trust him with yours. He's only fifteen but he knows your
secrets, all of them to the darkest one, just because he's had to go through
them himself. Sometimes that makes you angry, but mostly just sad - you tried
to stop from it all happening to him, but it's been damn near impossible to do
that from across the world.
***
Two days later, you step off of the plane. The ride to the venue is agonizingly
slow. You never let yourself realize how much you miss him while you're away -
it's better for you, not to always long for something you can't have with you,
and for Aaron, because he needs to learn independence, too, separation from
you. But now, when the traffic holds you up and you know you're not going to be
there to wish him good luck for the show; it leaves a unsettling feeling to the
pit of your stomach, but you know that's just a fading memory from the time you
needed someone's encouraging words to make you give your best.
You half-run to the backstage; the concert's been on for a good half an hour.
You stop in mid-step when you can see Aaron on the stage, the golden boy
covered in sweat, and a face-splitting grin on his face, obviously flirting
with a dancer of his. For a fleeting moment you can understand all the
screaming girls and lewdly grinning business-suited men all those years ago,
but the thought sides very quickly when genuine pride courses through your
veins. He's amazing, energetic, giving his best with every little move and
you're mesmerized with him.
It doesn't seem to take long when he's taking his last bows. You're trying to
keep yourself out of the biggest fuss, looking at Aaron, knowing he'll scan you
from the crowd of people the moment he steps off the stage and there it comes,
the hasty look around the space and light of recognition flares up in his eyes.
He runs to you through the crowd, not caring about the opinions of others and
hugs you fiercely, just clinging to you, not saying anything at first, but then
he's pulling back, grinning like the Cheshire Cat, patting your back.
"I'm so glad you're here, bro," he says, so cheerily that you can't help
thinking something is wrong.
"Where else would I be, bro?"
Your grin matches his perfectly.
***
It takes ages to get Aaron into your hotel room, to get rid of everyone who is
demanding something of him. You close the door and lean against it, looking at
Aaron, who's still happily - too happily - chattering about the interviews he's
had this week, who said what to whom, like he didn't know those were the last
things on your mind right now. You cross the room slowly and sit down next to
him and stop his almost annoying babbling by capturing his wrist gently in your
hand.
"What's going on, Aaron?" you ask quietly.
Aaron looks at you, smile slowly fading, letting his facade drop. He sighs,
deep and miserable.
"I told you on the phone already."
"You wanted me here cause you're tired? Bro, we're always tired."
You raise your hand to pet his hair; you're willing to take the chance he'll
cry - it makes you both uncomfortable, no matter how close you are, but you
have to find out what's wrong.
Aaron closes his eyes for awhile.
"Help me talk to her. I need to take a break, Nick. I. I can't hold it together
much longer if this keeps up."
Aaron's voice doesn't falter.
"Of course I will. But I could've done that on the phone, you know."
Aaron opens his eyes, turning to look at you.
"What if I just needed you?" he asks, with a slight edge to his voice. "What if
I just can't handle this on my own and I needed you. I'm sorry if that makes me
weak, but I need you sometimes!"
"Hey, come on, calm down, step away from the melodrama, Aaron." You're petting
his cheek. "Just calm down. I'm here."
Aaron's shoulders slump and he sighs. He takes a deep breath and tells you in a
quiet, subdued tone what has happened in the last few weeks, the lies she has
been feeding to him. Your throat tightens when you see unshed tears in his eyes
- not from being uncomfortable this time, just from sheer pain for him. He
quiets down, looking at you and you're at a loss of words for a moment.
"You know they are all lies, don't you? No one thinks like that about you if
you get tired, least of all people me. And." You have to stop and swallow to
continue. "Don't believe a word she says to you, okay? She. She's crossed the
line this time."
Aaron looks away, biting his lip and you cup his chin, making him look at you.
"This stops now, bro. I'm cancelling my stuff for the next week and I'm staying
here until your shows are over, okay? I'm gonna talk to her tomorrow. You. You
know it's gonna be ugly, but it'll get better after that, remember that."
Aaron nods hesitantly.
***
A few hours later you're turning off the light in the bathroom, going to the
bed and slipping between the sheets. Aaron's lying on his back on the bed,
staring at the ceiling. You turn off the bedside lamp, and look at his profile.
He's still, barely blinking and you can sense the tension seeping from him. You
open your mouth but the words don't come out - you reach and lay your hand on
his chest instead, resting it lightly on his heart. You don't feel the heat of
skin, the hard muscle underneath your hand, no, he's so tense under your touch
that you can't help letting out a wounded little sound.
"Aaron, close your eyes."
You press your palm flat gently against his chest and you can feel his too-fast
heartbeat under your fingertips. You keep your hand on his chest, heavy and
calming until his eyes have closed, his breathing has slowed down and the
tension drains from him. You fall asleep ages later, your hand still on its
place covering his heart.
***
You can't first tell what it is that wakes you - you blink your eyes open and
Aaron is right there, looking at you. You understand the feeling of being
restricted better now; he's straddling your hips, hands on either side of your
head and he's leaning closer, looking at you with a little smile on his face
with a curious glint in his eyes. He leans closer, taking in a deep breath
against your neck.
"Who do you smell like, Nick?" he whispers barely audibly. "I almost didn't
recognize you when I woke up."
You're pretty sure he's sniffing you.
"Smell?" you ask groggily and then it hits you. " I. I changed my cologne."
Aaron takes a deep breath.
"Change it back. I don't like it."
His cheek brushes against your jaw and a shiver runs through you. He's too
close, again too close and you need to get away, you raise your hands on his
shoulders to push him gently off of you but his almost hurt look stops you. You
can barely hear him.
"Don't you want me, Nick? Everyone wants me."
He leans again, lips almost brushing against your ear.
"Don't you want me anymore, Nick? You can have me. No one else, Nick. I'll let
you have me." And his lips brush against you and the spark of quicksilver is
suddenly all over your skin; not again, you promised yourself, you promised
this wouldn't happen again, he can't take it, it makes everything just worse,
you can't take it and then you're seeking his mouth with yours, those pink soft
lips are against yours, curled up in a self-satisfied smile. The growl erupts
from you and you push him off of you, just to cover his body with yours mere
moments later.
He moans, that little low helpless sound you love more than anything and you
try to draw another from him, kissing and gently biting his lips. His hands
trail burning patterns on your back, you can't breathe because he's too close,
too good, too familiar, soft, warm, pliable in your hands. He pulls back enough
to look you in the eye, whispering your name.
"...only one that loves me, Nick, I need you inside me, need to feel you, love
me, fuck me, Nick, fuck me, please, make me feel you."
You're gently gnawing along his jaw, breathing so hard your lungs burn, licking
the pink red trail you leave behind with soothing little strokes of your
tongue. He's moaning quietly, impatiently grinding up against you, his
underwear-covered cock rubbing against your stomach, spreading out tiny sparks
along your spine and you shift, just enough to turn him on his stomach, letting
him push his underwear down and toss them away. And then he's lying on the bed
again, pure gold shining through his skin, whispering obscenities under his
breath, hips almost lewdly propped up with a pillow.
You shift on top him, making him writhe under your tongue when you slowly drag
the tip down his spine. You cup his ass in your palms, the skin is white under
your tanned fingers and you dart your tongue against the tiny muscle, making
him moan your name, the sound of his voice making the heat coil under your skin
again. You lick and tease him, push your tongue as deep as you can - you're
trying to punish him with pleasure, try to make him feel unbearable pleasure
for making you do this.
You slide up his body, your hand reaching for the bag next to the bed, finding
the lube easily, coating your fingers with it and slipping your hand
uncomfortably between you two, enjoying the moan you draw from him when your
finger delves into him. You spread the lube on your cock - Aaron is moaning
even though you're barely touching him or maybe just because of that.
You start pushing into him and if the beautiful arch of his back and the high-
pitched whimper that leaves him weren't so familiar, you'd be scared. But then
he's moaning and pushing back on your cock and all but the wethottight leaves
you and you growl, starting a slow rhythm of thrusts into him. He's hissing in
pleasure, head turned enough for you to see his face contort in pleasure, the
slip of his pink tongue when he licks his lips. Your mind is on overdrive,
insideyourbrotherohgodnotagainfuckingyourownbrothersofuckinggoodsotight but the
pleasure takes that away.
You lean against him, keeping the slow, determined rhythm of your thrusts and
bite his shoulder gently, changing the angle of your hips on every move,
breathing hard against his skin. You've started to sweat a little, and you
can't help the low moans of pleasure and guilt that roll out of you
synchronously with the movements of your hips. He's whimpering, you know he's
getting closer and you speed your thrusts, you want to fuck the moans out of
him.
Suddenly Aaron tenses under you and his hips prop up and you sink impossibly
deep inside him, he's gasping and shuddering, coming apart under you, drawing
air in small whimpers, fingers digging into your wrist he has taken into his
grip. You can't help the rush of blood, he's so tight around you and he drags
you over the edge no matter how hard you try to hold back. You come with a low,
guttural growl, spasming against Aaron's skin and he knows how to work it, he's
drawing out your pleasure as long he can, smiling a calm, sated smile, still
breathing hard.
You have no intentions on moving, you know he likes, wants to feel you on top
of him and you understand exactly why - you used to love Kevin's weight on you,
him still deep inside you, breathing and whispering in your ear. You stay still
for a long while, making Aaron feel you, murmuring words of affirmation and
affection in his ear.
You are tainted, both of you, but Aaron purifies you, takes your secrets from
you and makes them his.
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