Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/1033289.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Homestuck
  Relationship:
      Bro/John_Egbert
  Character:
      Bro_(Homestuck), John_Egbert
  Additional Tags:
      Weed
  Series:
      Part 6 of Drabbles_and_Fics_from_12/12_-_02/13
  Stats:
      Published: 2013-11-05 Words: 1373
****** I Can Get Sexaul, Too ******
by orphan_account
Summary
     Based off "I Can Get Sexual, Too" by Say Anything.
You had no clue what you were doing.
Well, okay, you knew you were holding the phone in your hand, but you were too
out of it to actually grasp anything else.
Ring
"Hello?"
It’s John. Holy shit, why are you calling your little brother’s best friend?
"Uh… hello…?"
You should probably say something. You take another drag of the joint in your
hand.
"Is anyone there?"
"Heyyy," you say, and it’s slurred and you also don’t care.
"…Bro…?"
"Yessireeeee," wow, you slurred big time there, you should probably get your
act together. You cough and sit up on the futon as if John could see you and
you know he totally can’t. At least you hope not, god, you are so fucking high
and it’s great. “‘Sup.”
"Are you fucking high, Bro?" Wow, shit, how did he know? Did John have secret
super powers you didn’t know about? You hear a laugh and maybe you said that
out loud, you aren’t really sure. "Dude, you are so high, aren’t you?"
"Maybe," is all you say, except you’re actually aware you said it out loud this
time. You know he knows, though, John has always been a smart kid. More of a
smart-ass, though, if you’re thinking about that right now and you totally are,
because, wow, his ass has always been pretty nice. But you like to think of
yourself as a grown adult and hitting on your younger brother’s best friend is
not something grown adults do.
Wow, you are so fucking horny all of a sudden. You think you might have said
that out loud, too, because you hear a sharp intake of air coming from John’s
side of the phone and you start to rub your cock through your jeans.
"Fuck," you whisper and lean your head against the back of the futon. The line
is quiet for awhile and you’re pretty sure John hung up and you’re about to
throw the phone on the other side of the futon when you hear a little moan from
the speaker and you’re suddenly aware that you’re a lot more aware than you
were previously… or something like that.
"Bro…" he whispers so lightly you can barely hear him and it makes your dick
jump a little and having phone sex with a minor is not at all how you expected
your night to go, but then again you are pretty high so having any expectations
at all was a dumb thing to do. You unbutton your jeans and slide them off. You
stick a hand down your boxers and grab your fully-hard dick, openly moaning at
the sensation and you start stroking yourself.
"Are you touching yourself, John?" You ask him and your voice is rough. You
know he is, of course he is, but you just need to hear him tell you.
"N-no. Not yet. Just through my boxers."
"Are they those fucking ghost buster boxers you always lay around in when you
sleep over?" And you don’t even know why you just asked that because you don’t
really care all that much. Although, when he mumbles a yes, you can’t help but
smirk as you say "Take those fuckers off." And you know he does and that he’s
touching himself fabric-free because he makes the best sound ever and your dick
jumps a little at the sound and you want to hear him make that sound again.
Before you can even really finish that thought, though he makes another sound
that is even better and fuck, now you want John here in front of you- on the
futon with you and you want to pin him to the cushions and make him make noises
like those all the time. You close your eyes and imagine the scene as you work
your hand faster.
You hear a small squeak from John again and you’re hoping you said all that out
loud again, but fuck, you’ve stopped keeping track of what you’ve said out loud
and what has stayed in your head.
"Bro, I…" He pauses and you don’t want him to pause, why is he pausing "I want
you to fuck me," and shit, of all the things you thought you’d hear from John
Egbert, that was not one of them. Heck, now that you think about it you can’t
even believe you’re having phone sex with John Egbert. The same John Egbert who
has claimed to be strictly heterosexual on more than one occasion.
"Fuck, really?" Your breath catches in your throat after that and now all you
can imagine is fucking John and his great ass and you want it so bad and the
fact that John has said it out loud means you might actually get that chance
sometime and somehow. If you don’t
"Yes, I’ve actually… this isn’t the first time I’ve…uh…" and he doesn’t even
have to finish before you know what he means and you laugh. You can’t believe
you’re laughing, but this is so goddamn ironic and you think it might be the
only time you’ve ever correctly used the word ironic. He tells you to quit
laughing and you actually manage to do so, much to your own surprise, and
honestly you are very fucking pleased to hear that. It does your ego good and
makes you feel like less of a creep. Your ego didn’t need the boost, but you
like not feeling like a huge creep and that is what really matters here,
because in case you forgot (you didn’t) you are having phone sex with John
Egbert and he’s legit into it.
You rub at the head of your dick and tell John that if he were here you would
so fuck him and you would fuck him so hard that he wouldn’t be able to walk
straight all week. You can hear his breathing getting faster and he doesn’t
even have to tell you he’s close for you to know and you think that’s pretty
great. He’s chanting strings of 'yesyesyes' into the phone and you find
yourself getting really close, too, and fuck, you want him to be here so bad
and you realize this is why you hate phone sex because you always want to take
the phone out of the equation and just have regular sex.
You tell John how if he were here you would blow him and you imagine doing so
and you hope he’s imagining you going down on him. You start telling him how
you would treat him, how you would suck at the head lightly before stretching
your mouth around his cock. How you would go down as far as you could before
gagging. How you would lick at the underside and then lightly suck at the head
again.
You start drifting out again and you’re tugging faster and faster and then you
hear a moan and a slightly mumbled “fuck” come from John’s end of the phone and
you know that means he just came and that sends you over the edge and you are
done for.
There’s heavy breathing on both his side and yours and it takes both of you
awhile to calm down. When you do, though, John is the first to speak.
"So that was… nice," and you think, yeah, that was pretty nice, that was more
than nice.
"Yeah," is all you manage to say. The line is quiet for awhile, you don’t know
what John is doing, but you’re just kind of taking everything in. Your pot-
induced high is gone, so now you’re just enjoying your post-orgasm high and
it’s pretty great.
You tell John not to tell anyone and he agrees. You both know that “anyone” is
code-word for Dave and this is just something that would be best kept as a
secret for now, if not forever depending on where things go.
You don’t stay on the phone much longer. John has school in the morning and you
have jack-shit to do in the morning, but saying goodnight’s now is better than
letting the moment get stale.
Once the phone is hung up you put it back on the receiver and lay down.
You are so going to hell.
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