Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/5104628.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Choose_Not_To_Use_Archive_Warnings, Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Major
      Character_Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Kuroshitsuji_|_Black_Butler
  Relationship:
      Sebastian_Michaelis/Ciel_Phantomhive
  Character:
      Sebastian_Michaelis, Ciel_Phantomhive
  Additional Tags:
      SebaCiel_-_Freeform, neko_ciel, Mating_Cycles/In_Heat, this_is_a_very
      dark_story, I_am_not_tagging_everything_because_it_would_spoil_it, I'm
      giving_you_fair_warning_now_that_I_am_not_tagging_everything, so_if_you
      read_this_you_are_doing_so_at_your_own_risk, somewhat_canonverse, there
      was_no_fire_and_Ciel_wasn't_kidnapped, so_his_personality_isn't_exactly
      the_same_as_in_canon, at_least_at_the_onset, he's_much_more_of_a_cinnamon
      roll_than_in_the_start_of_the_manga/anime, male_nekos_can_get_pregnant,
      so_possible, Mpreg, Age_Difference, Size_Difference, there_is_no_incest
      in_this_fic, I_can_at_least_say_that_much, but_again_I_am_not_tagging
      everything, so_take_that_into_consideration_before_you_read
  Stats:
      Published: 2015-10-29 Updated: 2016-05-28 Chapters: 4/? Words: 28205
****** Hurt So Good ******
by KuroKitty_(HaleYes)
Summary
     Ciel is a beautiful neko that captivates and charms nearly every man
     that lays eyes on him.
     However, the boy only has eyes for one person: the man that he fell
     for when he was just a tiny kitten.
     When they are finally reunited after years of separation, Ciel is
     beside himself with excitement.
     That is, until he faces the harsh reality that sometimes love don't
     feel like it should.
Notes
     I am not tagging everything that this fic contains for possibly
     triggering or upsetting content, I can't do so without spoiling the
     story. All major archive warnings apply, so please take note.
     Please proceed at your own risk.
     This story is a gift to my amazing writing/roleplaying partner and
     equally amazing friend, KittehBoesternchen. Thank you so much for
     listening to me ramble on endlessly about this fic idea and
     encouraging me to write it. This one's for you <3
***** Like a Knight in Shining Armor *****
Vincent leaned against the frame of his son’s door, watching in silence as the
boy read aloud from his book. He was splayed on his belly across the fluffy
white duvet on his oversized bed, so very excessive for such a tiny neko, but
Vincent would give his son nothing less. Ciel was nobility, after all.
The kitten kicked his legs as the French words rolled from his tongue like a
sweet song in his soft, beautiful voice. His socked feet were adorned with
matching white ruffles, just like the panties he wore, exposed from his pastel
blue chiffon and lace dress riding up his body as his fluffy slate tail swayed
back and forth.
He was truly a gorgeous little thing, more captivating than any human or even
neko that Vincent had ever seen. He rivaled even his own neko mother with his
beauty, his eyes so very large and such an extraordinary color blue, bold and
royal with flecks of teal and aqua that brightened them. He had perfect pale
skin, like a porcelain doll but soft and warm to the touch, and when one was
lucky enough to be privileged to do so they were often met with one of the
unique treasures of knowing a neko – their rolling purrs. It was such a gift to
watch their eyes fall half shut and feel their chests vibrate with pleasure and
happiness in one’s arms. It was very calming and validating for their human
counterparts as well.
Ciel was quite tiny, much like his mother, considerably smaller than human boys
his age and much frailer. Indeed, nekos were extremely rare partially due to
their frailty and it was why Vincent and Rachel hadn’t had more children. The
pregnancy had put such a strain on his beloved wife that he’d feared he could
lose her if they ever tried again.
And so, Ciel was their only child; their precious little prince that would
someday pass on his father’s title of Earl to his husband, as nekos were not
permitted to own property or carry such titles.
Vincent didn’t mind that his only child was a neko, that they hadn’t had any
human children to pass their company and estate directly to. He had married a
neko, after all, because he adored everything about her and he knew that having
a neko child was a possibility and a rare blessing. There wasn’t a day that
went by when Vincent wasn’t complimented about his son’s beauty. He had no
worries about his son’s future; he knew full well that Ciel would be treated
like royalty and cherished, he had made certain of it, making all the best
decisions for the boy to allow him a life of privilege and happiness.
“Ciel,” Vincent said softly in the gentle voice he only used with his lovely
nekos. “Your mother and I will be leaving soon.”
He hated to interrupt the boy, working so diligently on his studies like the
bright young kitten that he was, but he and Rachel couldn’t allow themselves to
be delayed much longer.
Ciel sat up, leaving his French book open on his bed, his wet, pink lip
pouting.
“Why must you leave me behind?” He asked, turning those wide sapphire eyes that
Vincent had such a terrible time saying no to up to his father with a frown. “I
don’t want to be here all alone.” The kitten grabbed at his tail, fisting it
nervously in his tiny hands as he did when he was upset or anxious like a
security blanket.
Vincent walked over to the bed, taking a seat beside his son, not at all
surprised when the boy crawled into his lap. He loved being held, pet and
carried around, doted on like a real kitten, and it only made Vincent feel even
guiltier for their decision to have Ciel stay home.
“Your grandmother is very ill, darling,” he reminded the boy, tucking a strand
of his long, slate hair behind one of his human ears. “With your health being
so fragile, it would be dangerous to bring you away on such a difficult and
long trip and then expose you to her sickness. Your mother and I love you very
much and we don’t want to lose you, too.”
Ciel dropped his eyes, petite shoulders slumping and the ruffled sleeve of his
dress falling off one of his shoulders to his arm. His maternal grandmother was
likely dying and he wouldn’t be given the opportunity to say goodbye or give
his regards. They weren’t particularly close, his mother’s mother living quite
a distance away from them that was a journey by carriage of several days, but
Ciel still felt as though it was only proper for him to go along.
Of course, most of Ciel’s anxiety came from being separated from his parents,
particularly his human father whom he counted on for protection and affection.
He would miss sharing his father’s lap with his mother in his armchair by the
fire and having his ears rubbed and his hair pet and crawling into their warm
bed at night, only to be returned to his own several hours later when he was
sound asleep.
Vincent knew that his son was nervous about being alone and he pet through his
hair, eliciting soft purrs from his little kitten.
“You will be just fine while we’re gone. I’ve instructed the servants not to
take their days off until we return and then we will reward them with extra
time. They all know that you will be the head of the estate and will answer to
you in our absence. Tanaka has been instructed to look after you and I am sure
he will. He adores you and would never allow any harm to come to you, Ciel.”
“But, he isn’t you,” Ciel protested, leaning his cheek into his father’s hand.
Tanaka was their head butler and a wonderful servant, but it wasn’t the same as
having his parents there at all.
“No, he isn’t, but I need you to be here to take my place while I’m gone.
You’re growing up, Ciel. As a Phantomhive, you have important responsibilities
and I need to be able to count on you, my only child, to be ready to step up
and fulfill your duties at any time.”
Ciel twisted in his father’s lap and hid his face in the crook of his neck. His
father’s scent was a comfort to him and he didn’t know what he’d do when he was
so terribly far away.
“But what if there’s a thunder storm?” Ciel asked, earning him a hug and a kiss
atop his head from Vincent.
“Then you will call for Tanaka and he will make you warm milk with honey and
sit with you until it has passed,” Vincent instructed, smiling into the boy’s
hair. Should there be a storm, he was sure the servants would have their hands
full, Ciel was likely to hide beneath one of the beds and howl in fright and
they would probably have a terrible time getting him to come out. Tanaka would
need to be sure to look after Ciel before it even began to avoid such a mess.
“I need you to be brave, Ciel,” Vincent said softly, hugging the small kitten
close and rocking him in his arms. “In a few days I’m expecting a very
important visitor and I need you to be his host while I’m away.”
Vincent hated that he wouldn’t be home for such an important arrival, but he
was left with no other choice. He couldn’t very well expect Rachel to travel
such a great distance on her own, especially to see her mother on her deathbed.
It would be both reckless and cruel.
“Do you remember Mr. Michaelis?” Vincent asked, grinning as the boy’s slate
neko ears perked. “He should be arriving here from France in a few days.”
“Sebastian?” Ciel asked, sitting up at the mention of one of his father’s most
trusted business associates. His eyes widened and sparkled and all at once his
excitement was tangible. “He’s coming here? To England?”
“Yes,” Vincent chuckled, running his fingers through his son’s hair. “He should
be arriving in about three days. Do you think you can look after him and show
him a pleasant time while I’m away?”
Ciel nodded rapidly, shooting his father a bright grin.
The little kitten adored Sebastian Michaelis and everyone knew it. It had been
years since Ciel had last seen him, as he had moved to France when Vincent had
decided to expand Funtom into mainland Europe and put Sebastian in charge of
the business’s international affairs. Vincent nearly had to pry his clinging
young son from the other man’s arms when he had left; it had been quite hard on
Ciel.
It had been an excellent bribe to help him learn his French, Vincent suggesting
he be pen pals with his subordinate that Ciel had taken such a deep liking to.
Ciel had thought as he grew older that someday the letters would stop, that
Sebastian would tire of taking time from his busy life to respond to a mere
child that lived in another country, but the mail would continue to arrive at
the estate regularly and fill Ciel’s heart with joy.
He would snatch the letter and race to his room, shut his heavy, ornate wooden
door and jump and climb into his bed. He’d read it over and over, whispering
the words aloud to himself, sniffing the paper and the envelope and then
tucking it under his pillow, taking the previous letter and filing it safely in
the pink box decorated with hearts that he kept on the lower shelf of his
nightstand.
Their letters were not romantic; Ciel couldn’t bring himself to say the things
that his heart yearned to, knowing full well that he was just a little kitten
living quite a long way away and would probably never see the older man again.
They simply talked about their lives, Ciel would discuss his studies and the
social events his parents would drag him along to and Sebastian would tell him
about his life in France and things he thought would interest little Ciel.
Sebastian had mentioned nothing of coming to England soon; it was all a
surprise for Ciel.
“I’m glad to see this has cheered you up,” Vincent said, pleased and more than
a bit relieved to see that Ciel was feeling better and was as excited about
Sebastian’s impending visit as he’d suspected he would be. “He’s looking
forward to seeing you and spending some time with you. I assume I won’t have to
worry about you being a good host in my absence then?”
Ciel shook his head, bouncing with excitement in Vincent’s lap. It had been so
long since he had seen Sebastian, he could barely even remember what he looked
like or the exact tenor of his smooth, velvety voice. He’d been the most
handsome man Ciel had ever seen and his dark hair and tall statute had become
somewhat of a legend in the tiny kitten’s mind. He couldn’t wait to see him
again and imprint every detail of him into his mind – if only to think about
when he was alone in his room and all was quiet in the estate.
Vincent put a fist over his mouth, hiding his smirk at the way his son still
blushed at the mere mention of Sebastian’s name after all these years. He’d
been uncertain if Ciel would grow out of it, especially given the distance and
lack of interaction aside from letters, but the boy seemed to be even more
smitten now that he was maturing. Vincent didn’t mind in the least. After all,
he trusted Sebastian more than anyone else. It was why he had given him the
highest position in Funtom aside from his own.
“He’ll be delighted to have you as his host,” Vincent said warmly, building up
his kitten’s confidence. “I know you’re very capable of looking after my guests
and the estate. I’m very proud of you, Ciel.”
Ciel wrapped his arms around his father’s neck, hugging him tightly and
shutting his eyes. He still didn’t want his father to leave, but he felt
comfort at knowing in a few days Sebastian would be at the estate with him.
Granted, it was alongside of nervous excitement at how he’d handle himself in
Sebastian’s company, but he remembered very clearly, above all else about the
older male, the way Sebastian had made him feel; protected, adored and safe,
just as he did with his father.
“I’ll come fetch you after I’ve made certain all of our luggage has been loaded
into the carriage and your mother is set to leave,” Vincent said, kissing the
side of his son’s head. “Don’t make your mother worry about you while we’re
gone. Send her away with a smile?”
“I will, father,” Ciel promised, rubbing his cheek and jaw, his sweet kitten
scent, all over Vincent’s shoulder. It was both instinct and affection,
something his father understood well being married to a neko and took to
kindly.
“That’s my boy,” Vincent said proudly, standing and holding his son, giving him
a smile and a kiss on his forehead. “I’ll come for you shortly.”
He set the kitten on his bed and left the room, looking over his shoulder at
the flushed and confused boy sitting like an angel on a cloud with his head
cocked to the side. The poor thing didn’t know whether to be anxious, excited
or nervous. At least Vincent could take comfort in knowing Ciel would also be
in capable hands while he and Rachel were away.
Ciel sighed when his door clicked shut, falling back on his bed, blue chiffon
and lace flowing gracefully along with him and splaying across the bed. He
wrapped his arms around himself and shut his eyes, his heart racing and a smile
playing across his pink lips.
************************************************************
The large banquet hall of the Viscount Druitt’s mansion was filled to the brim
with people, elbows rubbing together as England’s elite shook hands and boasted
over copious amounts of alcohol. The air was thick with both the smoke and
scent of imported cigars, making the tiny kitten’s eyes sting and his nostrils
burn as he followed behind his father through the crowd, clinging to the leg of
his pants. It was rare that he was brought along to these events at all, his
health being much too fragile to be in large groups of people too often where
he could easily fall ill, but Vincent had felt it was time to begin introducing
his beautiful son to high society and this ball was one of the most heavily
attended in all of the Season.
Holding a drink in one hand and shaking with other men of status with the
other, Vincent wasn’t carrying Ciel as he usually did. It was likely all of the
spirits had gone to the older male’s head, clouding his judgment while his
nervous son slinked behind him, his neko ears pressed back against his head.
Ciel was small, barely knee height to most of the men that towered over him,
always much smaller than human children, and likely even neko children, his
age.
The crowd shifted and he was jostled, losing his grip on his father’s pant leg
and someone’s brandy spilling from a glass and onto his face. Ciel rubbed his
face furiously, getting the alcohol into his eye and howling in pain at the
sting. His small, kitten voice could barely be heard over the roar of the
drunken crowd around him and at once his eyes began to water as he searched
frantically for his father. He was too tiny to see much of anything, just an
endless forest of black tuxedo pants surrounding him like tall trees.
“Daddy?” Ciel called out, tears rolling down his cheeks as the fear of being
separated, of being lost, all set in. He had been warned for as long as he
could remember about the predatory nature of humans, that as a beautiful neko
he was something they would covet and wish to take for themselves. It had been
instilled in him since he could move about on his own never to wander far from
his father’s reach, lest he could be stolen away from his family forever and
subjected to terrible things, though the details of such still remaining a
mystery to the innocent kitten.
A heavyset bearded man looked at him with a wolfish glint in his eyes, though
he tried to mask his intent with a smile. Even as a small child, Ciel had been
an excellent judge of character and knew that he was in danger, his feline
instincts coupling with wisdom far beyond his age to alert him that he’d been
caught in the sights of a predator while alone and vulnerable.
“Here, kitty, kitty,” the man said, taking heavy steps toward him as Ciel stood
frozen in fear, his mouth hanging open in terror and his eyes wide and shaking.
“Aren’t you just the most beautiful little thing… come with me and I’ll dry
your eyes…”
Ciel cried out as loudly as he could, meowing for his father, catching the
attention of another man standing nearby.
Even filled with panic and terror, it was such a small voice, so very out of
place at an event bursting at the seams with loud, old men.
Sebastian narrowed his eyes in confusion, scanning the crowd for the source of
the strange cries. He saw a small, slate tail slip away through a pair of legs
and his eyebrows knotted together. He had no idea what kind of fool would allow
a cat to be loose at such an affair, but he worried the poor thing was likely
scared out of its mind. As a lover of animals, much more so than people,
Sebastian excused himself and made his way toward the direction of the cat,
searching the floor and hoping he’d find the creature before it was trampled by
drunken nobles and businessmen.
Eventually he found himself exiting the ballroom and in the hallway, which was
nearly empty save for a few of the servants rushing about to bring trays of
champagne and h’orderves to the guests.
Sebastian frowned, skimming his eyes over the floor. He saw no trace of the cat
and he pitied the animal that likely had some dolt for a master. He had all but
given up, hoping that the precious creature had found a safe, quiet place to
hide when a clap of thunder boomed from the sky and shook the walls of the
estate with its strength.
It was impossible for him to miss the howl that came from beneath one of the
banquet tables and Sebastian’s face that had been fraught with worry softened.
It appeared his little friend had found a hiding place after all, but was now
terrified of the impending storm that was about to come down on them. Sebastian
couldn’t help himself from approaching the table, hoping he could soothe the
animal that was no doubt very stressed from being at such an event as it was.
He had half a mind to bring it home with him, the poor thing deserved much
better than they were being treated. A soft pillow to sleep on and a bowl of
warm milk…
Sebastian knelt down and lifted up the starched white table cloth, gasping in
surprise when he revealed not a cat, but a very tiny child with cat ears and a
tail.
Ciel hissed and backed himself against the wall, terrified eyes fixed on the
stranger and his body curled up around itself.
Sebastian flinched at the non-human sound, not quite expecting to hear such a
thing, taking in the cowering child with interest. It took him several moments
to process what he was looking at, nekos being so very rare that most,
including Sebastian, had never actually seen one in person or even photograph
and didn’t even know anyone else that had. They were generally limited to the
very wealthy and powerful, and even then they could be hard to attain or come
across.
The child’s cat-like ears were pressed back against their head and it was
shaking with fright; Sebastian couldn’t help but frown at the prospect that he
was the source of some of that fear, being a strange man looking in on them in
their hiding place.
“I don’t intend to hurt you, little one,” Sebastian said in a soothing voice,
smooth as silk. “I heard your cries in the ballroom and I mistook you for a cat
that was foolishly brought along to this ball. I only meant to look in on you
and make sure you were safe, I didn’t want you to get trampled.”
Sebastian looked at the child carefully. It was dark beneath the table, hard to
make out much detail, but the neko was still so very tiny that trampling was a
legitimate concern. For the life of him, he couldn’t understand why the little
thing wasn’t being carried well above the crowds.
“Are you lost?” He asked the child, soliciting a nod and a few muffled sobs.
“Oh dear,” Sebastian murmured. He had no experience with children, he generally
paid them no interest, but he felt responsible now for the tiny neko he’d
followed. “From your… father?” Sebastian asked the child deliberately. The
little he knew of nekos, he was aware they were sometimes kept as toys even at
such a young age. The thought of the child being kept as the pet of one of the
drunk men he’d shook hands with that evening made his stomach sour so terribly
he didn’t want to allow himself to believe it could be true, though he knew
that the rich and powerful felt entitled to indulge in whatever pleasures they
desired.
Ciel nodded again and Sebastian breathed a sigh of relief. He felt much better
knowing he’d be looking to reunite the child with his family, rather than a
husband or master.
Once again, thunder ripped through the estate and Ciel howled in fear, wrapping
his arms around his skinny legs and trembling as tears fell from his eyes. It
just about broke Sebastian’s heart, such a tiny creature alone and frightened,
and he outstretched his arm and offered his gloved hand to the boy.
“I promise to keep you safe and help you find your father; I won’t let any of
those foul monsters put a hand on you, little one.”
Ciel was quiet for time, contemplating the older man’s offer.
“You really left the party because you thought I was a cat and you meant to
save me?” Ciel asked with uncertainty, his voice so soft and sweet that it left
Sebastian tongue tied for a moment.
“I’m telling you the truth,” he swore, his hand still offered to the child he
could now identify as a boy by his voice. “I could never allow any harm to
befoul a cat if I thought I could stop it. They’re such lovely creatures.”
Ciel worried his lip between his teeth, considering the man’s words carefully.
He was terrified to go with a stranger, having been warned by his parents for
as long as he could remember not to trust them, that they would steal him away
and hurt him. But, he couldn’t very well hide there forever, what would he do
if the other man found him before his father did? He seemed to be much more
threatening than the man that had all but crawled on the floor in his tuxedo
just to save a hapless cat at a ball.
The boy reached out and placed his hand in the man’s much larger one, about to
crawl out when another crack of thunder frightened him. He started crying more
and Sebastian sighed, sliding himself beneath the table enough to wrap an arm
around the shaking kitten and gently pull him out.
Sebastian was left breathless when he pulled the boy into the light, the tiny
kitten the most beautiful, precious little thing he’d ever laid his eyes upon.
“My goodness,” he said softly, brushing the boy’s long bangs from his damp,
tear soaked face and cradling him in his arms as he knelt on the floor. “Your
father must be devastated that you’ve gone missing.”
Ciel’s lip trembled, tears dripping across the sides of his face into the crook
of Sebastian’s arm and onto his tuxedo jacket. He wanted to go home so
terribly, where it was safe and familiar. He wanted to be back with his father,
where he knew he would be protected. He let out a sob that mixed with a meow
and the man holding him smiled down at him tenderly.
It was just about the cutest thing Sebastian had ever seen and he had to hold
back a chuckle, not wanting to laugh at the little kitten that was so genuinely
distraught. Even still, he was adorable, the lavender of his lace and tulle
party dress draping over Sebastian’s arm and making him look like a perfect
doll.
“Now, now, you’re far too beautiful to cry,” Sebastian said softly, wiping away
a tear from beneath the kitten’s wide blue eye with his gloved thumb. “I’ll
help you find your father. I’ll carry you through the ballroom so you can see
everyone and you can point him out to me.”
Ciel curled into Sebastian’s chest at the loudest crack of thunder yet, mewing
and clawing at his jacket with blunt nails, his ears pressed back against his
head and his tail fluffed out in distress.
The tiny thing practically tried to hide himself in Sebastian’s armpit and
Sebastian pulled off his glove with his teeth and cupped his hand around the
back of the boy’s head, rubbing gently behind his ears as he knew very well
that most cats found soothing and enjoyable.
“There now,” Sebastian murmured, curling the boy up in his arms and cradling
him close to his chest. “The storm cannot harm you, I’ll keep you safe and
warm, little one.” Oh, holding the boy was lovely, his small body so light and
warm. He was truly the most exquisite, most gorgeous little creature Sebastian
had ever seen. It was such a pity to see him so distraught but truly a
privilege to be able to look upon him and hold him, even if only for a short
time.
The man’s words and his touch were soothing, reminding Ciel quite a bit of his
father, how Vincent would pet him and speak to him in smooth, gentle tones when
he was frightened. All at once Ciel felt safer, believing the man’s words to be
true, that he did think Ciel was a cat and was a lover of animals, that he
truly wanted to help him and protect him.
“What’s your name, princess?” Sebastian asked, brushing the back of his fingers
over the boy’s exposed cheek to dry it.
“Ciel,” the boy answered quietly, turning a bit so his face rested on the man’s
chest and he could look up at him. The man’s eyes were soft and gentle, fixed
on him with both care and concern that appeared so very genuine it gave the boy
just a bit more confidence. “What’s yours?” He asked, blinking his eyes, a few
stray tears clinging to his long, thick black lashes.
“Sebastian Michaelis,” the man answered, his lips twisting up into a smile. It
was such a beautiful name for such an equally beautiful boy, so very fitting as
though the name itself had been made only for this gorgeous creature. “And who
is your father, so I might help you find him?”
The older man’s long black hair framed his face as he looked down at Ciel and
for a moment, the boy lost his train of thought completely. He’d never seen an
adult quite so handsome before, or was it perhaps that he had never noticed? He
was so very tall, with high cheek bones and a perfectly sculpted face that
exuded both beauty and strength, something that Ciel suddenly found he felt was
rather appealing. It was as though a scene from the fairy tales his father read
to him at bedtime had come true and he had been rescued by a handsome and noble
knight.
“My… my father is Vincent Phantomhive,” Ciel said, his eyebrows knotting
curiously as Sebastian’s lifted and his lips parted.
“Oh,” Sebastian breathed out, his face softening with a knowing look. It was an
immediate relief to know the child didn’t belong to some brute. “I know your
father quite well,” he said with a slight chuckle, feeling a bit lighter at the
turn of events. “We’ve been business associates for quite a while and he’s
recently recruited me to Funtom. You really are a princess.”
Ciel’s delicate face melted into a small smile and his body softened in the
man’s arms. His judgment had been right, he’d chosen to trust someone to help
him that obviously his father trusted and thought highly of. He was certain to
be safe after all.
He blushed at being called a princess, rubbing his cheek and his scent
mindlessly into the handsome man’s tuxedo jacket.
The innocent but possessive gesture wasn’t missed by Sebastian, such a lover of
cats, and his heart seized in his chest. The little kitten trusted him and was
marking him, as though he wished to keep him and tell the world he belonged to
him. Sebastian had never been more flattered; to have the favor of such a
beautiful creature was quite an honor.
“Let’s go find your father, shall we?” Sebastian asked, earning a nod from the
boy in his arms. He shifted Ciel so the boy was upright, his head above his
shoulders and high in the air so he could help Sebastian search through the
crowd for the familiar face of his father.
Ciel wrapped his arms around Sebastian’s neck and braced himself to be carried
back into the smoky and crowded ballroom and Sebastian could feel the boy’s
body tense up as they stepped inside.
“Don’t worry, beautiful, I’ve got you,” he murmured, brushing his own cheek
against the boy’s soft hair. He longed in that moment to kiss the top of his
head as he would a cat, but considered it inappropriate to do, considering it
was the child of his new boss and he had no claim to Ciel.
Sebastian couldn’t help but think it was strange, odd even, that Vincent would
bring such a delicate, young neko to an event like this. The patriarch of the
Phantomhive family had always shown such good, shrewd judgment and it seemed to
Sebastian that this was an event that Ciel shouldn’t have been brought to, full
of old drunks that were watching Ciel with the desire of hungry hawks as
Sebastian carried him through the ballroom.
“Daddy!” Ciel called out, tiny body bouncing in Sebastian’s arms as he pointed
to his father who was frantically looking about the room.
“There we are,” Sebastian said warmly, striding through the crowd to bring the
boy back to his father. He was pleased he was able to help reunite the boy with
his father, but still there was a nagging sense of loss in the back of his mind
that his time with little Ciel was about to end.
“Ciel, thank God,” Vincent cried out, pushing other men aside as soon as he saw
his son and rushing to his side, pulling him from Sebastian’s arms and
embracing him tightly. “I was so worried I’d lost you, I’m so sorry for not
keeping a better hand on you darling, I’ve never been so frightened.”
Sebastian watched their reunion quietly, arms feeling rather empty now that
Ciel had been taken from them. It was a feeling he couldn’t quickly shake,
finding himself wishing that like Vincent he could hug the boy tightly to him
and bury his face in his neck, smatter Ciel’s beautiful face with tender
kisses.
“Sebastian,” Vincent said warmly, drawing Ciel’s face to his own and kissing
the side of his head before offering his hand to the other man standing before
him. “Thank you for helping my son, when I noticed he’d gone missing I was
absolutely beside myself with worry.”
“Of course you were,” Sebastian said, tipping his head and looking at the boy
that was staring rather intently at him. “It was my pleasure; I wouldn’t ever
allow any harm to come to such a precious kitten.”
“A less honorable man would have taken him,” Vincent said firmly, his eyes
still reflecting worry to his subordinate. “I have to be very careful with him
and tonight I failed him terribly. That you returned him to me says a lot about
your character.”
“He helped me because he loves cats, not because I’m your son,” Ciel
interjected, earning him a surprised glance from his father that he looked over
to Sebastian to confirm.
“Is that so?” Vincent asked with surprise.
“Indeed it is,” Sebastian said, shooting Ciel a small smile. The boy was
talking him up to his father, his new boss, Sebastian took very kindly to the
sweet child’s favor. “I initially thought he was a cat and I wanted to get him
to a safe place so he wouldn’t be trampled or harmed by the guests here. My
feelings on the matter didn’t change when I saw that what I’d found was a neko
rather than a cat.”
“You’re a good man,” Vincent said, finally smiling back at Sebastian. “I’ll
remember this when I’m making the determinations for bonuses at Christmas.
There is nothing more precious to me than my Ciel.”
“I can see why,” Sebastian said earnestly and Ciel grinned and blushed, hiding
half his face in his father’s jacket.
“I think that’s enough of an adventure for both of us,” Vincent said to his
son, giving Sebastian a nod. “Say goodbye to Mr. Michaelis, Ciel. And thank him
for his help.”
Sebastian was loathe to see them go, to know that this unique moment in his
life when he had been in the presence of the sweet neko was about to end.
Ciel sat up, arms outstretched to Sebastian, and the man stepped forward and
took him gingerly from his receptive but surprised father.
“Thank you, Sebastian,” Ciel said warmly, wrapping his arms around his neck and
hugging him tightly. The little kitten tucked his nose behind the older man’s
ear and took in his scent, eyes fluttering and falling lidded.
Sebastian hugged the boy back, though keeping an eye on Vincent, highly aware
that the kitten’s father was watching their interaction intently.
“It was only what you deserved, little one,” Sebastian said smoothly, his
stomach knotting when Vincent gently pulled his reluctant son from Sebastian’s
arms.
Ciel watched over his father’s shoulder as he was carried away from Sebastian
toward the front doors. He felt an inexplicable feeling when the older man’s
form disappeared in the crowd, like he wanted to cry all over again even though
he’d been reunited with his father and was going home just as he wanted. He
didn’t want to say goodbye to Sebastian. His attention had been so special,
like he cared for him and adored him like his father, but yet he wasn’t his
father, which had sent a thrill through little Ciel’s entire being.
He had found his knight, just as all the fairy tales promised a princess like
Sebastian said he was would.
***** I'd Do Anything *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
It had been difficult for Ciel to fall asleep that night, unable to shake the
nervous feeling in the pit of his stomach from his parents, his father, being
away from the estate. If he needed them, it was unlikely he’d even be able to
get a message to them for several days and that thought sent chills down the
boy’s spine. Even with a staff of servants and a butler that adored him, Ciel
felt alone and frightened. He was dependant on his father for protection and he
didn’t feel comfortable or safe when he wasn’t around – especially at night.
Tanaka had stayed by his bed, as Ciel had requested, until he fell asleep. It
wasn’t until the early hours of the morning that the distressed kitten finally
dozed off; leaving both the boy and his butler exhausted the following day.
Sebastian was to arrive in just a few days and Ciel was both excited and
nervous. He wondered what it would be like seeing the older man now, if he
would carry Ciel around and dote on him as he had so many years earlier. It was
hard to say, and Ciel sat in the window seat in his father’s library and
pondered that very thought for most of the afternoon.
Ciel had cherished the memories he had of Sebastian, clung to them desperately
in hopes that they wouldn’t fade as the years passed. But, when they had last
seen each other, Ciel was a very small child. It was possible that Sebastian
had found amusement at spending time with little Ciel because of that – because
he was a cute child that reminded him of a cat.
While Ciel’s interest had been much deeper, the boy’s first and only crush; now
that he was older he understood that it was unlikely Sebastian had ever looked
at him the same way. Where Ciel had seen a handsome man, a knight in a black
tuxedo, someone that was strong, kind and capable of protecting him much like
his father, Sebastian had probably only seen a helpless child.
The thoughts depressed Ciel and he pressed his forehead against the window,
smudging the pristine glass and clouding it with his warm breaths.
He longed for Sebastian to pick him up and carry him about the manor again, to
be held up in his arms and cradled against his chest. But, he had grown. Indeed
Ciel was still very young and particularly petite, but he certainly wasn’t a
baby anymore. There was a fair chance that Sebastian would see him as far
beyond the need or desire to carried about and cuddled.
Ciel was quiet when Tanaka brought him his tea, his eyes glassy with unspilled
tears and a frown set deep in his lips.
“Can I get you anything else?” Tanaka asked him with sympathy, eyeing the young
boy who looked all but deflated even with his favorite biscuits presented to
him.
Ciel shook his head slowly, then opened his mouth and on second thought shut
it.
“Is there something you need? Company, perhaps?” Tanaka asked gently.
The kitten heaved a sigh, hands falling from the glass of the window where he
left tiny finger prints and into his lap.
“Do you suppose I’m too old now to be held?” He asked his butler carefully,
keeping his eyes fixed on the floor.
“Your father still holds your mother,” Tanaka pointed out, his grey brows
furrowing in concern.
“But, would anyone want to?” Ciel asked, lifting his eyes pitifully to Tanaka,
who cocked his head and smiled warmly at the kitten.
“Young Master, it’s only natural for you to miss your parents, it’s the fist
time you’ve had such a separation from both of them that I can recall. If there
is anything you need at all, I can assure you that any one of us that remain
here in the estate would be more than happy to help you,” Tanaka promised,
giving the boy a slight bow.
Ciel nodded and quickly dismissed his butler, slumping back against the window
with a sigh. It wasn’t exactly surprising that Tanaka had misunderstood his
question, thinking he merely missed his parents. It was obvious that Tanaka
still saw him as a child, much like Sebastian probably would; assuming all he
wanted was affection from his mother and father.
He did love his father’s warmth, but it didn’t quite compare to Sebastian. Just
the thought of the other man’s embrace made Ciel’s heart race, and he shut his
eyes and heaved a soft sigh. Every story of romance he’d read, he’d thought of
his Sebastian. He would daydream during his tutoring about Sebastian fighting
dragons for him, taking him away on amazing adventures, rescuing him from
monsters or trolls. They would always end with him falling into Sebastian’s
arms or being scooped up into them, kissed softly and then whisked away to a
place where they’d never be separated again.
It had all been just dreams, little fantasies that occupied his mind while he
was forced to practice his violin or sit through his parents’ dinner parties.
He’d never once really believed Sebastian would be returning to England – and
so soon.
Now it was real, the man he’d spent years longing for was going to be there in
his home again in just a few short days.
Ciel wanted nothing more than to somehow, someway, make Sebastian fall in love
with him.
He gazed out the window as his tea cooled, out into the front garden where they
had walked together so very long ago, a solitary tear rolling down his cheek as
the pads of his fingertips touched the glass.
“I don’t want you to leave me again,” Ciel whispered, his chest clenching as he
held back tears.
No matter how much time passed, it was still painful for the boy when he
thought about how he’d lost Sebastian, though truly he never belonged to Ciel
to begin with and the boy knew it.
Ciel had just been a sweet, cute neko that Sebastian had been fond of. It
wasn’t the way that Ciel had found Sebastian appealing. It wouldn’t be now,
either.
“What if he’s married? Or he’s in love with someone else? Then I wouldn’t have
a chance,” Ciel thought aloud, his beautiful face all but crumpling with
distress. It would be difficult enough to capture Sebastian’s heart, to hope
he’d see him as more than a cute child to play games with, but if Sebastian was
already smitten with someone else it was likely he wouldn’t be receptive to
seeing Ciel in any sort of romantic fashion at all. Even worse, he could arrive
with a lover and prevent Ciel from even having much of his attention at all.
The new worries upset Ciel’s stomach so terribly he pushed the tea tray away,
the thought of biscuits dreadfully unappealing.
He stood and made his way from the library, passing Tanaka on his way to his
bedroom.
“Young Master, are you going to bed so soon? Your dinner…”
“Tell them not to bother, I’m not hungry,” Ciel mumbled, his tail hanging low
and without spirit behind him.
“But, you must keep up your strength,” Tanaka protested, the little kitten
turning on his heel to look up at his butler such large, sad eyes that it gave
the older man pause.
“I want to go to sleep. Are you going to help me into my nightclothes or not?”
Ciel asked, his effort to make his voice sound commanding rather lacking in
bite.
“Of course,” Tanaka agreed, following behind the boy to his room.
He helped Ciel change from his daytime attire to a white nightgown made of
light weight cotton that hung just above his knees with ruffles trimmed with
blue ribbon around the hem of the neck. Tanaka tied the ribbon to keep the
ruffles from falling down the boy’s shoulders and turned down the blankets of
the oversized bed for him.
“If you are hungry later, I will bring you whatever you’d like,” Tanaka told
him, pulling the blankets up around the kitten’s small body and tucking him in.
“Thank you,” Ciel said quietly, dismissing his butler and nuzzling himself into
his pillow.
He shut his eyes, curling up around himself, thin arms wrapped around his knees
that he pulled up to his chest.
He was so very ready to be loved, to have a man in his life other than his
father. He craved having the older man’s body beside his own at night, for
Sebastian to kiss him the way he’d seen his mother and father when they didn’t
know he was looking. He wanted so terribly for Sebastian to really see him, to
notice how much he had matured and how good he would be to him if only given
the chance.
Vincent had turned away every suitor that had come asking for Ciel, and while
he appreciated that he wasn’t being forced into the arms of a man he didn’t
love, it was a hollow comfort when he didn’t have Sebastian, either.
If Sebastian still thought of him as a child, if he turned him away or rejected
him, Ciel didn’t know how he would ever recover. In his heart, after all the
years that had passed, it was still only Sebastian.
Ciel tried to tell himself that this was his chance to make his dreams come
true, but the boy slowly drifted off to sleep unsure if he even had a chance at
all.
*********************
Sebastian’s nerves were on edge when he approached the gate that led into the
garden of Franklin Moore, a successful London banker with close ties to all of
England’s most elite families. It wasn’t unusual for Sebastian to be invited to
such parties, especially as he climbed London’s social ladder through his
business endeavors, but this time he was approaching the garden party with far
different thoughts on his mind.
Instead of intending to make contacts and impress a few of the powerful and
established men he would shake hands with, he was hoping that Vincent
Phantomhive would be at the affair. Given the nature of the event, it was
possible that he’d have his charming neko son in tow, and there wasn’t anything
Sebastian desired more than to see the little kitten again.
The boy had all but consumed Sebastian’s thoughts since he’d been carried away
from him by his father two weeks prior. Indeed, for the first time in
Sebastian’s life, he’d felt lost when the kitten left his sight.
He didn’t doubt that Vincent was a capable father, that he loved his son and in
most instances looked after the boy quite well. But, Sebastian had seen the
state of him when he’d come upon him at the ball and understood the danger the
little neko had been in.
Sebastian had felt compelled from that very moment to protect Ciel himself.
It hadn’t been an option, Sebastian having no claim to Ciel and the boy being a
small child that was still very much attached to his family – the ones that
would eventually decide who would be the lucky man to share the duty of looking
after Ciel’s well being once he had grown or Vincent was prepared to give him
away.
In spite of Sebastian’s respect for Vincent, he knew it was a possibility that
the man could very well decide to keep the boy for himself – it wasn’t unheard
of when it came to nekos, in spite of them being of close relation inbreeding
was fairly common – but Sebastian hoped that wouldn’t be the case for Ciel.
That Vincent had brought the boy to the ball and hadn’t introduced him to high
society as his pet rather than his son gave Sebastian confidence that Vincent’s
intentions with Ciel were pure and honorable, if not perhaps a bit misguided,
bringing the boy to an event full of men that wanted to put their hands and
mouths all over the tiny neko.
Sebastian liked to think that if he had such a precious kitten he would keep
him safely at home, away from the prying eyes and salacious thoughts of a
hundred drunken men.
Of course, if Vincent hadn’t brought little Ciel along with him to the ball,
Sebastian never would have had the pleasure of meeting the sweet little thing.
And as such, he couldn’t fault the man for that.
And while he shook hands and was greeted by the host and some of the other
guests, he couldn’t help but scan the crowd, searching for the beautiful kitten
with sapphire blue eyes.
His breath hitched in his throat when he saw the boy running through the yard
chasing after a butterfly, his lilac floral bishop dress hunched up in one hand
exposing white sandaled feet, lavender ribbons adorning the base of each of his
neko ears. The breeze carried Ciel’s laughter to Sebastian, as if nature was
presenting him with a gift, and for a moment everything else in the world
ceased to exist outside of the beautiful, determined Phantomhive boy.
“Good afternoon, it’s nice to see you,” a voice said, carrying Sebastian along
with it back to reality.
He blinked, his mind registering that the patriarch of the Phantomhive family,
his boss, was standing before him with his hand out to be shaken.
“Excuse my rudeness,” Sebastian said, extending his hand for a shake. “I’m a
bit tired today and not quite myself. I was up late last night going over the
books of Funtom’s accounts you had sent over to me.”
“Well, then all the more reason for you to have a break today, it sounds like
you earned it,” Vincent said with a nod, taking a sip of wine, his eyes
scanning over the man in front of him deliberately.
Sebastian could feel the other’s stare and he cleared his throat, taking a
glass of wine from a tray carried by one of the servants.
“Even still, I’m enjoying working for Funtom, I appreciate the fast pace with
the level of business the company is doing,” Sebastian said forcing himself to
keep his eyes locked with Vincent and not allowing them to stray to the boy
playing in the field.
“And I’m very happy to have you on board,” Vincent continued, turning his gaze
to his son.
“You’ve been quite the celebrity at our home since the ball,” Vincent said
smoothly, watching Ciel as he laughed and played.
“Oh?” Sebastian asked, trying to mask his interest with a tone of indifference.
“I don’t think an hour has passed without Ciel talking about your heroic rescue
and how wonderful you were,” Vincent said with a smirk as he drank his wine.
“It wasn’t all that,” Sebastian said modestly, though his stomach lurched at
being thought of as heroic by the kitten. “It was simply the right thing to do,
to help a lost child.”
“I see,” Vincent murmured, shifting his gaze back to Sebastian. “Though I don’t
suppose either of us would be capable of convincing Ciel otherwise, would we?”
Sebastian stood frozen for a moment, considering the weight of the other man’s
words. It seemed as though Vincent was asking him whether he planned to play
along with Ciel’s interpretation of what had occurred, lest they both would
need to persuade him otherwise and downplay what appeared to be a rather
significant event for the young kitten.
“If you’re asking me if I’m willing to keep up such an appearance for the sake
of Ciel, I have no interest in being anything but a proper gentleman,
especially in his presence,” Sebastian said earnestly, wanting to do nothing to
tarnish the young boy’s image of him. “I can assure you, sir, I will only act
in a way around your son to uphold his positive view of me. Seeing him cry once
was enough to break my heart, I certainly wouldn’t ever want to do anything to
let him down or cause him any pain.”
Vincent was quiet, as though carefully considering his subordinate’s words.
“I don’t like Ciel to be disappointed,” he said in a slow, calculated way.
“There are some things that I cannot protect him from, but I’d rather keep him
sheltered from certain realities for as long as possible.” Vincent arched an
eyebrow, searching for agreement from the other man and continuing once
Sebastian nodded. “He doesn’t understand the depravity of men just yet, nor do
I want him to. If he considers you honorable, I expect you to act as such in
his presence.”
“My intentions concerning Ciel have never been anything but honorable,”
Sebastian said smoothly, holding eye contact with Vincent. “When I found him I
returned him to you immediately, did I not? Without even knowing he was your
son, I had no other thought than making sure the child was safe and returned to
his family. I’m sure Ciel has told you as much?”
When Sebastian had initially thought he was following a cat, it had crossed his
mind to keep the little creature for himself, sure. But, once he discovered
that the silky slate tail belonged to a neko child, his reaction was to return
him to whomever it was the little kitten had been separated from.
That train of thought gave Sebastian pause, and he wondered just how he would
have handled the situation if Ciel had instead told him he’d been separated
from a master or if the boy had been crying because he had run away rather than
been separated from such a man. Sebastian knew the proper thing to do would
have been to return Ciel, as he was seen as a type of property under the law,
but he wasn’t certain he would have been able to follow through with it. It had
been difficult enough to hand the little kitten over to his own father, someone
Sebastian admired and respected. Had he been expected to give Ciel to a
boisterous, loud pervert, Sebastian didn’t quite know if he could have followed
through with it.
All at once he imagined bringing the kitten home with him in his carriage,
wrapped up warmly in blankets in his lap to keep the damp evening air from
giving him a chill. He would bathe him and check him carefully for any injuries
given to him at the hands of his master, then dress him for bed in one of his
white button up shirts that would be so large he would have to roll up the
sleeves to reveal tiny fingers. He’d build a fire in the bedroom and bring
little Ciel a mug of warm cream and pet through his silky hair, nuzzle his face
into it and rub his neko ears until he yawned and relaxed against his chest.
Then he would carry his lithe body to his bed and curl around the boy’s small
frame, wrap him up in his arms until he all but disappeared, keeping him safe,
warm and protected. Whispering into his hair that he’d never let anyone hurt
him again, that he’d stay by his side until the very end.
Suddenly, Sebastian found himself wondering if perhaps he might have been
mistaken by being relieved that Ciel had a loving father rather than an abusive
pig.
But, when the boy ran over to them, wrapping his arms around his father’s leg
and beaming up at Sebastian with bright eyes that sparkled in the afternoon
sunlight, he knew that his thoughts had been selfish. No matter how lovely it
would have been to bring little Ciel home with him to hold and spoil, he
couldn’t wish that the boy had ever been in anything other than loving hands –
even if they weren’t his own.
“Hello darling,” Vincent murmured, stroking his fingers through Ciel’s hair in
a way that made the little kitten’s eyes seem to glaze over.
Sebastian longed to pet him, to give the boy such innocent pleasure. His
fingers itched to touch and he had to force his wrist to stay at his side.
“Sebastian,” the boy said so sweetly the man’s heart skipped a beat. Never
before had his own name sounded quite so beautiful than the way it did in
Ciel’s voice, whispered past his plush, pink lips.
“Good afternoon, princess,” Sebastian said warmly, giving the child a slight
bow. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
The boy blushed and hid half his face into the leg of Vincent’s pants, watching
Sebastian with one, wide eye.
“We’re having a tea party,” Ciel explained softly, thumbing over his shoulder
to where a few other children had set up a table with dolls and stuffed
animals. “I thought, maybe, Sebastian could come?”
Sebastian grinned, taking a knee in front of the boy and holding his palm open
to him. “I’d be honored to escort you,” he purred in silken tones that made
butterflies dance in little Ciel’s belly.
Ciel had been so excited to see Sebastian at the party, though a bit shy about
rushing straight over to say hello the moment he saw him. When the other
children had suggested a tea party, Ciel could think of nothing else but
inviting Sebastian to join him, to show off the handsome man to all of the
other children.
The kitten bounced at the knees, his hands balled up in fists of excitement in
front of his chest. That Sebastian would go along with him, spend even a few
moments with him, made Ciel so happy he felt as though he could burst with joy.
Sebastian extended his hand to the boy, Ciel’s disappearing when he placed it
into the older man’s. Sebastian looked up at Vincent, taking pause and watching
the man’s expression carefully before standing. He didn’t seem angry, and
Sebastian had said outright that he was going to play along with little Ciel’s
opinion of him being heroic and kind. It would certainly crush the little
kitten’s heart if he was to turn him down for such a sweet and innocent
request.
“I gather you’ll be keeping a close eye on him then,” Vincent said, leaving no
room for protest and giving Sebastian a pensive look.
“Of course,” Sebastian said smoothly, giving Vincent a slight smile and a nod
as little Ciel tugged on his hand. “I won’t let him out of my sight and will
return him to you after our tea.”
Vincent said nothing more, keeping his eyes squarely on Sebastian as Ciel
tugged him away and toward where the other children were.
“Thank you for thinking to invite me,” Sebastian said softly, giving Ciel’s
hand a gentle squeeze as he felt Vincent's stare over his shoulders. “It’s been
quite a long while since I’ve been to a proper tea party and never as the guest
of someone so beautiful. It’s quite an honor.”
Ciel’s face flushed with pink and he glanced up at Sebastian, his shoulders
hunched bashfully. “You… you think I’m beautiful?” The boy asked with
disbelief, blue eyes widening in surprise.
“Of course I do,” Sebastian murmured, the corner of his mouth twisting up into
a smirk. “When I pulled you from beneath the banquet table two weeks ago, I
thought I’d surely never see anyone look more beautiful, but then, here you
are…”
“But, I was dressed for a ball that night,” Ciel said, cocking his head and
squinting his eyes. “How could I possibly look better today?”
“You’re happy today,” Sebastian pointed out, stopping beside one of the small
tables covered with a fabric table cloth and set up for afternoon tea with a
miniature set small enough for a child’s hands and bending down to be eye level
with the boy. “You’re always exquisite, but even more breathtaking when you
smile.”
Ciel blushed furiously, dropping his chin and looking up at Sebastian through
his long, thick, dark lashes. He had been called beautiful before, but not by
anyone that had ever mattered to Ciel. Ciel very much wanted Sebastian to think
he was beautiful, to like him, to want to spend more time around him. The young
boy could barely explain the feeling, nor could he fully understand it, but the
attention from Sebastian made him feel like he was soaring through the sky.
“Th-thank you,” Ciel said demurely, his voice so very sweet that Sebastian
broke out into a full smile watching the shy little thing process his
compliments. Ciel was such a treasure, so innocent, pure and lovable. Already,
Sebastian wanted to give him everything he could ever want, even though he was
certainly a very spoiled child.
“You can sit down and I’ll make you some tea,” Ciel suggested, tiny hands
fisting up in front of him nervously while some of the other children watched
with interest at the adult that had come to play along with their game.
Sebastian looked at the chairs set up, hiding a chuckle behind his fist and
clearing his throat. Ciel had done well, the efforts at a proper set up didn’t
go unnoticed by Sebastian, but all of the chairs around the tables were child-
sized.
“I’m afraid I may be a bit too big to sit in any of these chairs,” Sebastian
said apologetically, watching with amusement as Ciel’s face shifted from
confusion, to realization and then embarrassment. “Never mind, though, I’ll
procure one large enough for both of us while you pour me some tea. I’ll take
two lumps of sugar and a bit of milk.”
Sebastian winked and stood, fetching a white wicker chair from the patio and
carrying it over to where Ciel was waiting, carefully holding a small,
porcelain teacup in his even smaller hands.
“Thank you, princess,” Sebastian said was a small bow, taking the cup from the
boy and sitting down in the chair. His eyebrows lifted when he looked down at
the yellow liquid in the cup and he discreetly sniffed it to ascertain the
contents. The children were using lemonade as tea and the dear boy had added
milk and extra sugar to it, just as Sebastian had requested.
Ciel watched him expectantly and Sebastian dutifully brought the cup to his
lips for a taste.
“Delicious!” Sebastian lied, earning a proud grin from the precious kitten.
“The best cup of tea I’ve ever had.”
“Really?” Ciel asked skeptically, though it was obvious to Sebastian that the
boy wanted terribly to believe it was true by the hopeful look on his face.
“It is,” Sebastian swore, putting his hand over his heart. “Though my judgment
may be a bit biased since it was made for me by such a lovely kitten.”
Ciel clasped his hands over his mouth, shyly turning his face away, his heart
racing at the compliment. Sebastian was acting like a true gentleman and Ciel
had never been more flattered. It was just like in all the bedtime stories his
father read him, about princes and knights courting the ones they adored.
“Ciel,” Sebastian murmured, the boy’s name tasting finer than the best vintage
of wine on his tongue. “Come, sit with me.”
The boy grabbed the sides of his dress, fidgeting with the fabric and pulling
on it, looking up at Sebastian with uncertainty.
“You said you were getting a chair large enough for both of us…” The boy
started, his head tipping and the ribbons in his hair bobbing along with the
movement.
“Indeed, I did,” Sebastian said, patting his lap with his free hand.
“Oh!” Ciel breathed with realization, his tail curling and ears twitching with
interest. He’d only ever sat in the laps of his father and close family
members, though now that he was no longer a baby he rejected anyone but Vincent
– not comfortable being held that way by just anyone.
But Ciel had enjoyed being carried through the ball by Sebastian, he’d missed
it the very moment it ended and had daydreamed quite a bit about it since their
last meeting. Sebastian’s arms were strong, but his touch was gentle. The older
man smelled like comfort and his body was warm. Ciel had found himself longing
to be near Sebastian again, to the point he played the scenario out with his
toys (and himself alone in his room) many times over.
“Okay,” Ciel said softly, with a slight shrug of his shoulders, giving
Sebastian a tiny smile as he began to crawl into his lap.
Sebastian couldn’t help himself, wrapping a hand around the boy’s petite waist
and pulling him close to his body, keeping his arm hooked around him. It was
wonderful to have the kitten in his arms again, like little Ciel was right
where he was supposed to be. It would be even more difficult to let him go now
and Sebastian didn’t even want to think of how cold his bed would feel that
night without Ciel’s soft, warm body curled up against him, sleeping soundly,
right where Sebastian knew the precious boy was safest.
He didn’t miss Vincent watching them as he talked with other party guests, the
other man’s eyes inevitably returning to Ciel and likewise Sebastian, watching
their interactions with interest and scrutiny. Sebastian couldn’t necessarily
blame the man, he was sure to watch over Ciel like a hawk himself and he had no
claim to him, no responsibility for him, was essentially no one to the small
child sitting in his lap and playing with the tip of his tail.
Those thoughts sat like a rock in Sebastian’s stomach. The boy seemed to think
he was very much someone. It should count for something.
“I’m happy to have met you, Ciel,” Sebastian said quietly, setting down the now
empty tea cup and resting his hand on the kitten’s knee.
“And I, as well,” Ciel said genuinely, grinning shyly and tucking his chin into
his shoulder.
“Your father told me how much you appreciated that I helped you, but you didn’t
deserve anything less than proper chivalry.” Sebastian took the boy’s chin and
gently turned it, gazing down at the blushing boy, the rest of the world be
damned. “I’d be honored to be your knight, Ciel. To protect you and help you;
keep you safe from all the terrible things in this world.”
“R-really?” Ciel asked, looking up at Sebastian with wide-eyed wonder. He
suckled his lower lip into his mouth, contemplating the older man’s words. It
was exactly what the kitten needed, someone that would look after him as his
father did, but did Sebastian mean it only as a friendly, familial-type gesture
because of his relationship with his father, or was it more, what Ciel wished
it to be? That Sebastian wanted to also be his prince and care for him in a way
both alike and different from his father, the way that whenever Ciel thought
about it, he felt excitement and butterflies.
“Of course,” Sebastian chuckled, reaching for the boy’s cheek and gently
tugging on it, pulling the boy’s worried lip from his mouth and turning his
mouth up into a smile. “I never want to even think of you scared and crying
again. From now on, I’ll be here for you to call upon, should you choose to do
so.”
Ciel considered the offer and nodded rather quickly, liking the sound of it, of
having Sebastian always within his reach. It gave the kitten a sense of comfort
he had never quite experienced before, like there was someone else out there
that he mattered to in some way, that he could rely and depend on if his father
was indisposed or away.
“You promise you’ll be there for me if I need you? You won’t lie to me or hurt
me, not ever?” The small child asked so very seriously that Sebastian all but
melted.
He stroked his hand into the kitten’s silky, slate hair, scratching gently
behind the boy’s neko ear. Ciel mewed and leaned against Sebastian and into his
arm, resting his head against his chest.
The pets felt lovely, so very delicate and soothing. Ciel rubbed his cheek
against Sebastian’s shirt and pawed at his chest, his eyes lidded as his tiny
body began to vibrate with deep purrs.
“There now,” Sebastian whispered, cradling the boy close and watching with awe
at the tiny neko purring in his embrace. He’d always delighted in making cats
purr, but there was something so extraordinary about having such an effect on
the beautiful creature relaxing against him.
“I will never betray you or your trust, little one,” he murmured, grazing the
back of his fingertips over the boy’s plush cheeks as his eyes fell shut. “I’ll
protect you and keep you safe, do everything in my power to ensure your
contentment so you should never cry or feel alone and lost ever again.”
Holding the sleeping kitten was the greatest pleasure Sebastian had ever
indulged in, fulfilling on such a deep and meaningful level. Ciel was likely
far too young to understand the promises Sebastian had made to him, how serious
and strong his words had been. He was ready to devote himself to little Ciel,
do everything he possibly could to keep the kitten from ever experiencing even
a shred of pain or displeasure again.
Sebastian looked up from the sleeping child to find Vincent watching him from a
distance, then excusing himself from the conversation he was involved in to
approach Sebastian, who was now entirely alone at the abandoned tea party save
for the little angel sleeping in his arms.
“I can take him from you now,” Vincent said, standing in front of Sebastian and
looking down at his son.
Sebastian’s body tensed and he swallowed thickly, pausing long enough in his
response that Vincent raised his eyebrow.
“It’s no bother, holding him,” Sebastian said dismissively, curling Ciel a bit
closer to his chest. “He’s comfortable; I wouldn’t want to disturb him. I can
look after him until he wakes, I don’t mind it a bit.”
“I’ll take my son back now, Sebastian.” Vincent’s voice, while still friendly,
had taken on a firmer tone, one that Sebastian knew without a doubt meant that
the other man wasn’t going to take kindly to a discussion.
“Of course,” Sebastian said quickly, standing up and passing the sleeping
kitten carefully to his father. It was so much harder to let the boy go this
time, Sebastian was sure to have a hell of a night alone with his thoughts.
“I appreciate your… concern for Ciel,” Vincent said, his words both careful and
deliberate. “While I appreciate another set of eyes on him, looking out for
him, you must always remember that I’m his father and I have his best interests
at heart.”
“Of course, sir,” Sebastian said, his eyes widening slightly. “I would never
think any differently of you or question your sincerity and devotion to Ciel.”
“There are men that will do anything to get their hands on him, that will tell
any number of lies and attempt to manipulate me to give him up,” Vincent said,
his jaw tightening. “Men that look at my son with lust and desire that is both
unfathomable and appalling to me at his age.”
“Sir, I have never once...” Sebastian started, holding his hands up.
“I’m not accusing you, Sebastian,” Vincent said coolly, narrowing his eyes and
staring into the distance. “You could have taken him from the ball and I’d have
never been the wiser that it was you. I think we both know that. You haven’t
given me a reason to question your motives, but there are others. There are
already men that have mistaken me for a fool, thinking they’re smarter than me
and can pull one over on me.”
“Surely any man that would think such a thing of you is the fool,” Sebastian
said, frowning as his eyes fell back to the boy. He wanted to hold him again,
kiss his forehead and feel his purrs…
“It doesn’t matter. My point is I need to keep an eye out for him, be extra
vigilant. And if you care at all for him and his welfare, you’d be wise to
understand this,” Vincent said, turning his eyes back to Sebastian’s. “You
don’t know what other men have already tried, what has been said to me, offered
to me for my son. You haven’t dealt with the sick bastards already stalking my
son like he’s prey.”
“I do understand, Sir,” Sebastian swore, doing his best to keep his tone calm.
“Anytime you entrust him in my care, I will be both honorable and particularly
guarded toward any other men as well. You have my word. I would never allow any
harm to befoul him.”
Anger prickled through Sebastian at the mention of the way other men were
lusting after Ciel, trying to get their filthy paws on him. He had seen the way
they looked at Ciel when he’d carried him through the ball to Sebastian, but
knowing there had been actual unscrupulous attempts by any at acquiring the boy
for themselves made Sebastian furious.
“See to it that you don’t break your word,” Vincent said unflinchingly, pulling
Ciel to his chest and kissing the boy’s forehead as he walked away, leaving
Sebastian standing alone, his mind a dreadful mess of both longing and worry.
He would keep other men from getting their hands on Ciel.
Vincent didn’t even need to ask.
Chapter End Notes
     So, I'm really into this fic right now (like, really, REALLY into
     it), but I'm trying to gauge interest in it. I have a lot of projects
     and I sort of want to see if people are feeling this or not, so if
     you do like it please let me know. <3 As always, thanks for reading
     my words!
***** One way or another *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
“Young Master… Young Master, please wake up.”
Ciel grumbled and pulled his covers up high on his shoulder, neko ears
flattening against his silken hair. He was much too tired to be getting up just
yet, routine be damned.
“Young Master, I need to speak with you and be given your orders,” Tanaka
insisted. “Please, you must wake up.”
Ciel slowly opened one eye and saw his butler standing before him in his dark
bedroom holding a candelabra. It was the middle of the night.
“Whatever it is, can’t it wait until morning? I barely slept at all last
night,” Ciel whined, shutting his eyes again and rolling over and away from
Tanaka.
“But, Sir, Mr. Michaelis has arrived early. I wasn’t sure if you wanted to
greet him, since you are currently the head of the household. I suppose I could
show him to one of the guest rooms…” Tanaka trailed off, rubbing his chin
thoughtfully.
The half-asleep kitten bolted upright the moment his tired brain processed what
Tanaka had said.
Sebastian had arrived . He was downstairs in the foyer at this very moment, in
the same place as Ciel for the first time in years.
“Of course I will see him now!” Ciel shouted, his eyes wide and wild as he
leaped down from his bed and raced toward his bedroom door, bare feet smacking
the hardwood as he ran.
“But, Young Master, your bedclothes!” Tanaka called after him, but Ciel paid
him no mind, running down the hallway toward the landing of the grand staircase
as quickly as his feet would carry him, his tail high and proud behind him. He
was too disoriented to remember to be nervous or shy, his raw excitement at
finally seeing Sebastian again overcoming any fear or nervousness he might have
had earlier in the day.
He stopped at the top of the stairs, his nightgown swirling around him in a
flourish, cheeks flushed pink and kitten ears perked as he caught his breath.
Sebastian.
There he was, looking up at Ciel from where he stood near the door, alone.
He was alone.
The corner of Ciel’s lip ticked up in a small smile, the relief of him being
without a spouse or a lover like a weight lifting from his heart. Surely
Sebastian wouldn’t travel back to England alone if he had a companion.
Ciel had a chance.
“Ciel,” he murmured, reaching out his arm and extending his hand to the panting
kitten that looked down at him from atop the stairs.
Ciel nearly floated down the steps, his feet as light as his mood and the
ruffles of his nightgown catching the air. He was more beautiful than ever,
grown up and ready to know the love of someone other than his family. It was
the very moment he had spent years waiting for, dreaming about and longing for.
He hadn’t once been able to even consider another suitor. His heart had already
been taken.
“Sebastian,” Ciel breathed, taking his hand and giving it a shake. He longed to
jump into the taller man’s arms, be held as Sebastian had done so long ago. He
was still so much smaller than the raven haired man that he could still carry
little Ciel about with ease, should he feel so inclined. The mere thought made
Ciel’s blush even deeper.
“I’m sorry to have kept you waiting,” Ciel said softly, his eyelashes
fluttering as he craned his neck to look up at the still dangerously handsome
man that he had missed so terribly. “We weren’t expecting you until the
weekend. Should I assume that your trip was comfortable?”
“You were worth both waiting for and the journey,” he said smoothly, kissing
the boy’s hand, much to Ciel’s surprise. “I have no complaints.”
Ciel’s eyes darted away and his chest clenched. Sebastian was treating him like
a proper gentleman should, but his flattery didn’t seem as though it was just
for the sake of propriety. Not with the way the older male hadn’t taken his
eyes off of him since he had appeared.
“I suppose I should have changed into something proper,” Ciel murmured with a
shrug, brushing his hand over the front of his nightgown and then looking back
up at Sebastian.
“Don’t be foolish,” he chuckled lowly, looping one of his fingers through the
blue ribbon that tightened the ruffled collar of Ciel’s nightgown. “Someone as
exquisite as you are is beautiful in no matter what he wears.”
Ciel bit into his lip, eyes wide as saucers and his heart pounding in his ears.
Sebastian was definitely flirting with him. Was he dreaming?
The older male tugged gently on the ribbon and it came undone, the collar of
Ciel’s nightgown falling over his shoulders and onto his arms. The kitten
gasped, catching his nightgown before it fell below his chest and pulling one
side of the collar over his shoulder.
His cheeks were dark red.
“My apologies,” he hummed, shaking his head. “It seems my finger was caught.”
Ciel’s heart raced at the obvious lie, and his tail twitched behind him as he
dropped his head. Sebastian had always had lovely words for him, but he didn’t
know how to respond to something quite so forward.
“Of course, perhaps this wouldn’t be suitable for all company,” he crooned,
leaning down and catching Ciel’s chin between his thumb and forefinger.
“Perhaps you should reserve this look for only your most private guests.”
“Of-of course,” Ciel stammered, swallowing hard. He had been terrified that
Sebastian would forever see him as a child, that the older male wouldn’t fully
appreciate just how much he had grown in the time he’d been away in France.
But, it appeared that Sebastian was willing to look upon him as something more.
Ciel was ever so grateful for the opportunity.
“You can leave you luggage here,” the kitten said, trying to find his voice and
speak with an ounce of authority and maturity. “I’ll have the servants bring it
to your room. We can go to the parlor for some tea, you must want to unwind
after such a long trip…”
“Yes,” he murmured, the corners of his lips twisting into a smirk. “After you.”
Ciel pulled on his nightgown to make sure one side of his collar was staying
securely on his shoulder and he made his way toward the sitting room, pausing
along the way to ask one of the servants to start a fire and bring them
chamomile tea.
“I was surprised when my father told me you were coming,” Ciel admitted, taking
a seat in one of the grand armchairs that furnished the elegant room. “You’d
never mentioned it in your letters, I thought…”
“You thought that I didn’t want to see you?” the older man interjected
smoothly, relaxing into Vincent’s favorite plush leather chair and loosening
his tie.
Ciel nodded, looking up at Sebastian bashfully. There was no way to hide how
thrilled he was that the dark haired man had finally arrived. Ciel had all but
clung to Sebastian the last time he saw him as it was, how could he pretend
that he was indifferent now?
“I merely wanted to surprise you,” he chuckled, leaning toward Ciel. “Your
father and I couldn’t be sure that something wouldn’t come up that might
postpone my trip here and I didn’t want you to be disappointed.”
“It was a lovely surprise,” Ciel said softly, folding his hands in his lap. By
the time Sebastian had left, he had felt so comfortable around him. It wasn’t
uncommon for nekos to form bonds with humans, particularly ones that had the
capability of being both a provider and protector. It made it easier for their
sires to blur lines and keep them home permanently, but as Vincent hadn’t shown
any proclivity toward such a thing, it had allowed for Ciel to imprint someone
else into his mind as a potential mate.
Sebastian.
But, so many years had passed between them, and Ciel didn’t know how to behave
around the older man. He was no longer a child and he couldn’t just clamor into
his lap and nuzzle against his neck. It would be profoundly inappropriate, not
to mention rather juvenile behavior. He had never known Sebastian as anything
but a young kitten, however, and it was as though he had to get to know him all
over again.
It was something that Ciel hadn’t really anticipated.
Instead of feeling warm and content as he always had before, he felt awkward
and nervous, like he had to impress Sebastian and find a way to enchant him
without coming on too strong and embarrassing himself and his family. He was
older now and he knew it was wildly improper to throw himself at any man, no
matter how he felt about him. He needed to be reserved and modest, present
himself as the sort of boy that Sebastian would want standing by his side.
It was terribly overwhelming.
One of the maids returned with a tray of tea and set it up for both Ciel and
his guest. The little lord dismissed her immediately after that so he could be
alone with Sebastian. For as nerve-wracking as it was to be alone with him now
that he wasn’t quite sure how to behave, having an audience was even more
stressful.
Ciel cocked his head in confusion when Sebastian chuckled to himself out of the
blue, his neko ears twitching with interest.
“You’re darling,” he said with a sly smile, taking a sip of his hot tea. “To
offer me tea as a nightcap. I see you are still as innocent to the affairs of
grown men as ever.”
Ciel’s face felt hot and he looked down, grabbing onto his twitching tail with
one hand. It hadn’t even occurred to him to offer Sebastian brandy or some sort
of dessert wine. He’d only been at the estate for a few minutes and already he
was looking upon Ciel as though he was a child again – and Ciel had unwittingly
fed into it.
The kitten tried to hide the pained look from his face, determined to do
whatever it took to look mature and grown up after this faux pas.
“Young Master,” Tanaka said, coming into a room with a slight bow. “It is
awfully late; shall I prepare your bed for you?”
Ciel jerked his head up and glared at his butler, absolutely mortified at the
implication he had a bedtime. “I will tell you when I am ready for bed,” he
hissed, kitten ears pressing back in anger. “Do not interrupt me again!”
Tanaka, taken aback, frowned and stepped away from Ciel. “I’m terribly sorry,
My Lord. I was simply looking out for your well-being as your parents had
requested.”
Ciel glowered as their head butler left the room, bitter and humiliated at how
Tanaka had opened his mouth in front of Sebastian.
“Tsk,” the older man tutted, taking a sip of his tea. “Such disrespect from a
servant. He’d certainly be reprimanded if he worked for me. Though,” he
smirked, watching as Ciel’s eyes widened, “I suppose you don’t have that sort
of power or authority.”
“A-Actually, I’m the head of the estate while my parents are away,” Ciel said
defensively, firming up his slight jaw. “They all are on strict orders to
answer to me.”
“Mmm, but they treat you as a child…”
Ciel huffed, crossing his arms in frustration. None of it, his reunion with
Sebastian, was going the way he had hoped. Sure, it had gotten off to a good
start when the older man had arrived alone and seemed to be flirting with him,
but he was supposed to be…
The kitten’s face fell. He had no idea how Sebastian should be treating him
now. Every frame of reference he had was from when he was much younger. His
fantasies were unrealistic. Sebastian wasn’t going to scoop him up into his
arms and kiss his forehead. Those days were long since over, and whatever was
left between them, Ciel wasn’t sure how much of it was simply fantasy.
“It’s no matter,” he said gently, reaching out to tuck a wayward strand of
slate behind one of Ciel’s human ears. “Show them that you don’t need them to
mother you any longer. Be firm with them and demand your autonomy and space.
Surely you don’t believe they need to be around to coddle you or make sure you
get enough rest?”
“No… I don’t…” Ciel lied, his lip pouted as he leaned just slightly into
Sebastian’s touch. He had missed the way the older male would pet him so
terribly, he ached inside at just the slight reminder of it. “They weren’t even
supposed to be here, they were meant to have their annual vacation, but since
my parents went away, my father ordered them to stay.”
“He left you in charge, didn’t he?” He ran his fingertips down Ciel’s cheek and
the kitten’s eyes fell shut, dark lashes fanning over his flushed skin.
“Dismiss them yourself if you like. Show your father you don’t need to be
babysat. It’s not as though you would be alone if there were an emergency… I’m
here.”
“But… the household… I can’t really…” Ciel was at a loss. He wanted terribly to
prove himself to Sebastian, show him how prepared he was to be his everything,
but Ciel was completely inept at taking care of himself, much less hosting a
guest on his own. He didn’t even draw his own baths or button up his clothes.
How would he eat or feed Sebastian? Ciel had never prepared a meal in his life.
“Perhaps it would be best if they stayed until my parents return. I wouldn’t
want your stay here to be anything but relaxing.”
“Of course,” the older male murmured with intrigue, his eyes roaming over
Ciel’s exposed shoulder as he settled back into his chair.
“I hope you aren’t terribly disappointed my father was unable to be here for
your arrival,” Ciel said with hesitation. The kitten knew his perspective on
Sebastian’s visit was terribly warped – Ciel knowing that Sebastian’s focus was
not purely on their reunion as it was for him. Indeed, their time together was
surely only something incidental. Had his father not offered their home and
Sebastian stayed at an inn, Ciel might not have even seen him or known he was
in England at all.
“Have I ever been disappointed to see you?” He lifted an eyebrow and took a sip
of his tea, awaiting the kitten’s answer to his mostly rhetorical question.
“I… I don’t think so?”
No, anytime he had been in Sebastian’s company, he had been greeted with warmth
and had never been treated as though he was a burden, even though he was so
very young. It was possible that his annoying presence had gone over little
Ciel’s head, as he was probably unprepared to pick up on subtleties, but
Sebastian had always seemed so genuine in his desire to give him his attention.
“Seeing you is never anything less than a delight,” he assured Ciel, standing
up and walking behind the kitten’s chair to place his hands on his shoulders.
Ciel shivered, Sebastian’s hand cool on his exposed skin, though he lolled his
head back just slightly.
“You haven’t changed much at all,” the older male mused, rubbing his thumbs
into Ciel’s shoulder blades and causing the kitten to bite back a moan. “Still
such a small, precious, little thing.”
Ciel wasn’t sure how to take the statement, if it was meant as flattery or a
dig.
“I’ve grown up quite a bit since you last saw me, Sebastian,” Ciel whispered,
swallowing hard.
“I suppose your father wouldn’t have left you to entertain me if he didn’t
think you were grown enough to be good company for his guests,” he mused, a
smile in his voice. “Though it’s curious he would instruct the staff to stay
and baby you.”
“It isn’t to baby me,” Ciel insisted defensively. “He just… he wants to be sure
that I’m safe and taken care of…”
“I see.” He removed his hands from Ciel’s shoulders, stopping in front of the
boy’s chair and nodding his head. “I’m sure you’ll prove any of these misguided
notions I have terribly wrong tomorrow, but I fear I shall be going to bed now.
Pleasant dreams, Ciel.”
Ciel was dumbfounded, watching with his mouth slightly agape as Sebastian
waltzed out of the room without looking back.
He set he jaw and stood, hands balled into fists and his eyebrows furrowed.
Tomorrow he would show Sebastian that he was no longer a child.
He would show Sebastian he was ready to be taken seriously.
Ciel didn’t need his servants or his father to make sure he was safe or taken
care of anymore, he had Sebastian.
And now, he was determined to make sure that Sebastian knew it.
--------------------------------------------------
It was several weeks until Sebastian was invited to a social engagement where
he might have the pleasure of seeing Ciel again. The little kitten had captured
his heart, and Sebastian found himself rather distracted from his typical
affairs with thoughts of his boss’s son. His urges were not deviant, Sebastian
never wished to hurt the kitten physically or emotionally, but he knew if Ciel
was with him and in his care that no harm could ever come to him. He would
never make questionable choices as Vincent had and bring Ciel to parties filled
with unscrupulous adults that would look upon him as though he were a toy or a
pet. No, Sebastian would return from work each evening and spend the night
playing games with the kitten and reading him to sleep in front of a fire. It
would be warm and delightful, and Ciel would never have a worry in the world.
Sebastian would spoil him beyond anything his father could ever be capable –
because Sebastian would put Ciel first, not himself as Sebastian knew Vincent
did. The boy’s father’s dedication would pale in comparison to what Sebastian
had to offer.
As it was, Sebastian was relieved when he was invited to the Phantomhive estate
for drinks with some of the men that Funtom had business dealings with. It was
an informal, impromptu meeting; one which was to be accompanied by billiards
and hefty amounts of spirits and wine.
Sebastian had never quite longed for anything before, but when it came to the
little kitten, every moment he was separated felt painful in way he had never
experienced. What was worse was that he never could be sure that any time he
did get to see Ciel, that it wouldn’t be the last. His interests and
relationship was with Vincent – not his neko son.
Indeed, showing too much interest in Ciel could backfire.
Vincent had already given him warnings, made it clear that he didn’t and
wouldn’t tolerate anything indecent when it came to his son. Sebastian had no
such proclivities, but there was no way to guarantee that if he didn’t handle
himself properly, Vincent wouldn’t draw his own incorrect conclusions.
Even still, Sebastian hoped he would catch a glimpse of Ciel when he arrived at
the manor and he was disappointed when there was no sign of the kitten at all.
He struggled internally, knowing he should be pleased that Vincent had sent
Ciel away for the evening while he entertained his guests, but it meant that
Sebastian wouldn’t get to see the boy either.
But, once the butler had led him to the billiard room and he saw the character
of the men inside, Sebastian knew that Vincent had made the right call.
He would have done the same.
Sebastian only vaguely recognized a few of Vincent’s guests, and several of
them appeared to be less than savory individuals. He’d had suspicions that
Funtom was involved with organized crime, and the other men in the room only
gave credence to them.
It was networking and as such Sebastian knew to turn on his charm and socialize
with the others, regardless of his unpleasant opinions of them. He was on track
to move up quickly within Funtom and showing hesitation around any associates
of Vincent’s could prematurely end his career.
It would also mean he would lose his connection to Ciel.
It was all rather bearable, tedious as it was, until the Phantomhive’s head
butler entered the room of boisterous drunks to remind Vincent that his son was
waiting for him to tuck him in. Vincent excused himself, classy as ever, and
left his guests alone to say goodnight to Ciel.
That was when the true colors came out.
“What a pity he doesn’t share the cat-boy with his guests, you know Lord
Belcher always has,” a tall, thin man bemoaned with a shake of his head. “As
our host he should care more about our comfort.”
“I offered him several months’ wages for the boy and he turned me away,” a red-
haired man said with a snort. “More than the cat is worth, I’m certain.”
“I heard he has declined all offers,” an older gentleman interjected. “Rumor is
that he plans to give him to his old school buddy, but with how stingy he is
with the boy I have half a mind to believe he intends to keep him for himself.”
“Still, he could at least let us use his mouth,” snarled a hard looking man,
earning himself a chatter of agreement from the others. “It wouldn’t harm him
in the least.”
The conversation swirled around Sebastian and his blood boiled with rage.
Everything Vincent feared, everything he feared, was all true. The men
surrounding Vincent all had their eyes on Ciel and were thinking of him in the
most disgusting, perverse ways. It was no wonder that Vincent had all but
ordered Sebastian to watch out for others and warned him that many meant harm
to his son.
The appalling topic disappeared as soon as Vincent returned, though it had left
Sebastian furious and ill at ease. It took all of his self-control not to get
involved in an altercation with every one of them, but he managed to hang back,
quietly observing and waiting for the proper moment to inform Vincent of what
he had heard.
It was important, Sebastian realized, not only to protect Ciel but also to earn
Vincent’s trust. The more Vincent trusted him, the more he could do for Ciel,
after all.
And so he took his time leaving, waiting for the others to stumble into their
coats and stagger drunkenly to their carriages, allowing himself to be the last
to leave so that he could have a moment alone with his boss.
“Sir,” he said in a serious tone, stopping at the door. “I don’t mean to keep
you any later, but there is something I wish to discuss with you that I don’t
think can wait until morning.”
“Oh?” Vincent asked, pausing for a moment and motioning for his butler to close
the door. “Well then, what is it?”
Sebastian glanced at the butler, then back to Vincent and cleared his throat.
“Is there, perhaps somewhere that we can discuss this privately?”
Vincent lifted his eyebrow, interested, but clearly a bit drunk himself. “Of
course,” he said, motioning toward the parlor.
“Sebastian!”
Sebastian looked up the stairs to the source of the sweet voice that had called
out his name, his heart melting when he saw little Ciel standing on the landing
wearing a white cotton nightgown with ruffles that made him look like an angel.
His face softened and he smiled just barely, grateful to have been able to see
the boy after all, even if only for a moment.
“Ciel, what are you doing out of bed?” Vincent asked, rubbing his forehead with
frustration. “You should have been asleep hours ago.”
“I wanted to see Sebastian,” the boy said simply, descending the stairs with
his tail waving behind him happily, his ears perked and twitching.
Vincent groaned, giving his son a look of exasperation. “Does your mother know
you’ve come down here in this state?”
“No,” Ciel said with a shrug, stopping in front of Sebastian and grinning.
“She’s asleep. And I can’t fall asleep without a story.”
“I know your mother already read you one,” Vincent said with a warning tone,
rubbing his temples. “I’ve had a long night, Ciel, and I’m in no mood for
games.”
“Then Sebastian can read to me,” Ciel offered, as though he had just come up
with this solution and it hadn’t been his plan all along.
Sebastian might never have felt more flattered.
Vincent looked over at Sebastian warily and Sebastian shrugged slightly, trying
to keep his expression benign. “I really don’t mind, if it will help him fall
asleep it should only take a few minutes. Then we can discuss what I overheard
when you were out of the room earlier?”
The glint of interest returned to Vincent’s eyes and he sighed, nodding in
agreement. “Very well, go fetch one of your story books and bring it to the
parlor, Ciel.” The kitten beamed and trotted off, but not before Vincent could
call after him that it had better not be a long one.
Vincent had his butler start a fire in the parlor and fetch drinks for himself
and Sebastian while they settled into the lush armchairs and waited for Ciel’s
return. Right on cue, the boy burst through the parlor doors with a rather
thick book, much to Vincent’s annoyance, and climbed right into Sebastian’s
lap.
“I told you to pick a short one,” Vincent said crossly, Ciel shifting and
snuggling up against an amused Sebastian.
“It is short!” Ciel argued, otherwise ignoring his father for Sebastian’s
attention. “And it’s a really good one. You wouldn’t want me to have Sebastian
read something boring, would you?”
“Just get on with it,” Vincent grumbled and Sebastian chuckled softly, little
Ciel cuddling into the crook of his arm and resting his head on his chest.
Sebastian longed to kiss the top of his head and tell him just how cute he was,
but he doubted any of that would go over well with Vincent.
As he read the story, Ciel fisted at his tail and held it like a security
blanket, the kitten occasionally rubbing his cheek firmly against Sebastian’s
chest in a way that made his heart fill with warmth. He knew enough about cats
to know that Ciel was rubbing his scent onto him, marking him as his own, in
his own little way telling the world that Sebastian belonged to him. It was
truly touching and Sebastian wished there was a way to convey to the kitten
just how pleased and flattered it made him – and return the gesture to let
anyone that neared Ciel know they would have to answer to Sebastian if they
even looked at him improperly.
He had no such option, instead settling for holding the boy close as his body
began to relax and brushing his hair away from his heavy eyes when his head
started to droop.
Sebastian couldn’t hold back his smile when Ciel started to purr loudly,
shutting his eyes and twisting in Sebastian’s lap to curl against his chest. He
looked so peaceful and happy, his tiny hand holding onto both his tail and
Sebastian’s shirt, eyelashes fanned over his face, his beauty breathtaking.
“Is this going to turn into a problem for me?” Vincent asked coolly, shattering
Sebastian’s moment of bliss like he’d doused him with ice water.
“No,” Sebastian said sincerely, his voice soft. He was holding the most
precious creature in the world, he wouldn’t disturb him, there wasn’t a chance.
“I think he is darling, but I don’t look upon him the way your other associates
do.” He lifted his head, pulling his eyes from the sweet kitten’s sleeping form
to look at Vincent. “When you left this evening, they were talking about Ciel.”
“Were they?” Vincent asked darkly, taking a drink of his brandy and a glance at
his son. “And just what were they saying?”
Sebastian took in a deep breath, pulling Ciel just a little bit closer. He
didn’t even want to speak the words aloud; they were so grotesque. “Quite a few
things, really, though none any less appalling than another. They think you’re
a poor host for not allowing them to use Ciel as they wish to make them as
comfortableas possible…” Vincent’s eyes narrowed and Sebastian continued,
brushing a hand protectively through Ciel’s hair. “They complained you won’t
sell him to them, that you expect more for him than he’s worth, that there are
rumors you have promised him to your school friend but plan to keep him for
yourself.”
The anger flared in Vincent’s eyes and Sebastian felt some relief. He had been
nervous, perhaps a bit paranoid, that Vincent truly had promised Ciel to one of
his friends or was considering keeping the kitten after all, but the man’s
reaction of pure rage eased Sebastian’s concerns a bit.
“They said you should at least allow them to use Ciel’s mouth, if that is the
case and you have other plans for him…”
Vincent finished the rest of his brandy and set his glass down forcefully on a
side table his jaw clenched and his composure unraveling.
“The plans I have for my son is for him to marry someone that will treat him as
I do his mother,” Vincent hissed, his fingers digging into the arms of his
leather chair. “I will not sell my son. I will assist in finding him a suitable
husband and when he is of appropriate age, his betrothal will be a marriage
with all of the dignity and respect someone of his beauty and status deserves.
He is not an animal; he is my son.”
Sebastian exhaled with relief, rocking the sleeping kitten slightly in his
arms. The vibrations of his purrs felt lovely, soothing and relaxing. Sebastian
never wanted to let him go.
“I was as angry as you were when I heard what they said; it’s why I wanted to
inform you about it immediately, without making a scene, of course,” Sebastian
said smoothly, looking over at Vincent who was pouring himself more brandy.
“I don’t understand your loyalty,” Vincent said flatly, continuing to drink.
“Do you want a raise?”
“No,” Sebastian chuckled, shaking his head. “When the time is right, of course,
but not because I did the right thing. You have given me a place of trust in
your company, and as both your employee and social acquaintance, I couldn’t
imagine keeping such information from you. Had I left without telling you what
I had heard tonight, I surely would have watched the sun rise.”
“I should take him up to bed,” Vincent sighed, staggering toward Sebastian. “He
isn’t a healthy child and he should be where he can rest properly.”
“Sir,” Sebastian said with pause, standing up slowly. “I could carry him to his
room for you. You seem a bit… exhausted yourself.”
Vincent ran a hand through his hair, his normally perfect skin flushed from all
of the alcohol he’d consumed. “Fine, it’s just upstairs, I’ll show you.”
Sebastian pulled Ciel closer to himself, tightening his embrace protectively.
He was glad he didn’t have to hand Ciel over to Vincent in the state he was in,
he was liable to drop the boy, or even worse, fall on him.
He followed Vincent slowly up the stairs and down the grand hallway to the
boy’s room. It was as grand as the rest of the manor, all the finest furniture
and fabrics, everything looking perfect and suited for royalty.
Sebastian reluctantly placed Ciel into his large bed and pulled the blankets up
to his shoulders, brushing the hair from his face lightly with the tips of his
fingers. He longed to hold him all night in his arms where he knew the kitten
would be safest or at the very least, kiss his forehead as he slowly pulled
away. But, Vincent waited in the doorway and he knew he couldn’t jeopardize
what little he did have. For now, it would have to be enough… even though, as
he dared to look over his shoulder at the peacefully sleeping kitten, he feared
it wouldn’t be.
Chapter End Notes
     I'm sorry this took me so long to update, thank you so much to all of
     you that were both interested and supportive after all this time <3
     Thank you very much to @britefairy03 for beta reading this for me <3
***** Suitcases of Memories *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
The following morning, it didn’t take Tanaka any coaxing to get the usually
reluctant kitten out of bed. Ciel had barely slept at all that night as it was,
running his interactions with Sebastian over and over in his mind in a
continuous loop.
There had been moments when he thought that Sebastian was looking at him like a
potential partner, but there were even more times that Ciel felt Sebastian
still saw him as the child he once was. Yes, he was a bit dependent on the
servants and even his parents, but it didn’t mean that he hadn’t grown up. His
mind and body had matured over the years and his feelings for the older man had
as well.
No, Sebastian wouldn’t be a prince that arrived just in time to save him from a
dragon or trolls, but he would make the perfect husband if he could only see
what Ciel had to offer.
Indeed, Ciel had been trained to be the perfect wife from before he could speak
in full sentences. He knew exactly how to behave during social engagements and
interactions as to never diminish his future husband’s respect or standing. If
Sebastian would merely give him a chance to show him just how perfect he could
be for him, Ciel just knew he would make him happy.
The teen glanced over at Tanaka, who was opening up his wardrobe to select his
attire for the day. This was exactly what Sebastian had looked upon him
critically for – his inability to look after himself.
Ciel was so dependent on his servants he couldn’t even dress himself.
“No,” the boy said coolly when his head butler procured a rather plain dress
from the cabinet. “Sebastian is an important guest. I need clothing that will
reflect that!”
Tanaka raised a bushy, grey eyebrow, unaccustomed to Ciel having any interest
whatsoever in what he wore on a day to day basis. “As you wish, my lord,” he
said calmly, looking through the wardrobe for something more formal.
He pulled another dress that was far too boring and Ciel dropped his feet to
the floor with a huff, stalking over to where his clothes were hung and rifling
through them until he found an elaborate piece that his parents had just
recently had commissioned for him. It was a dusty pale blue lightweight velvet
with a polka-dot patterned tulle overlay. The bodice was tightly fitted and
trimmed in cream lace and ribbons, as were the cap sleeves that hung just off
his shoulders. Cream lace was attached up the bodice and down the front of the
skirt in an apron style, with two bunches of cream satin ribbons affixed to the
waist in the front near his hips. The skirt flared beneath his petti skirt and
was cropped short in the front, high above his knees, with a longer train in
the back. Tanaka helped him into thigh high cream colored stockings that
attached to garters and brown suede knee high boots with heels that laced all
the way up in the front.
Ciel brushed his bangs away from his face, pinning them back and between his
neko ears with clips affixed with the same elegant, cream colored satin ribbons
that adorned his dress.
He smiled at his reflection in the full length mirror, his bewildered butler
standing behind him. He looked much more grown up now, and the boots even made
him taller. That was decidedly a bonus, since Ciel hadn’t grown much over the
past decade, and he was certain that made it harder for Sebastian to see him as
the young adult he currently was.
“Your guest is waiting for you in the dining room,” Tanaka said with a slight
bow, and Ciel nodded, taking in a deep breath and mustering up his courage. He
had stumbled a bit the night before, but he had been woken up from a deep sleep
and was caught off guard.
Today, he was determined to make Sebastian fall in love with him.
And when he stepped into the grand dining room and saw the look of desire the
older man’s eyes when they fell upon him, Ciel was certain that he’d finally
gotten Sebastian’s attention in the way he’d wanted it for so long.
He’d noticed Ciel was beautiful.
Ciel took the seat across from Sebastian, blushing slightly under his lingering
stare.
“Good morning,” Ciel said more softly than he had planned, his eyes darting
down to the omelet on his plate.
“It certainly is now that you’ve joined me,” the dark-haired man said so
smoothly that Ciel shivered. “I should start all my days with such a
privilege.”
Ciel was sure he should say something to that, but he was too flustered to come
up with a response. Sebastian was definitely flirting with him, but Ciel wasn’t
at all sure how to flirt back. He was probably supposed to be coy, say
something light and teasing, but his mind was blank and his heart pounded so
loudly he was sure Sebastian could hear it.
“D-Did you sleep well?” was Ciel’s pathetic response, and he internally cursed
himself for not coming up with something that would encourage Sebastian’s
interest in him.
“Unfortunately, no, I did not,” he said with a sigh, looking away from Ciel for
the first time since the boy had stepped into the room and up to the ceiling.
“I probably shouldn’t bring it up, but I… oh, no, I shouldn’t. It was just
fine, darling. Nothing you need to worry yourself with.”
Ciel’s eyes widened and he set his fork down, unprepared for Sebastian’s
response. It had been a casual question and he had expected a bland response.
It was simple pleasantries, but something had gone awry. Even worse, Sebastian
felt he couldn’t tell him about it – probably because he thought he was too
immature to deal with whatever the problem was.
“No, please tell me,” Ciel said, thin brows furrowed with concern. “I was left
in charge and you are a guest of my family’s, I will see to it that whatever is
bothering you is taken care of immediately. I can promise you, I am more than
capable. Besides, I wouldn’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
“Oh,” the older male lamented, turning his gaze back to the determined boy.
“It’s just that the wing you set me up in is entirely vacant and is utterly
lacking in warmth. I felt as though I had been assigned to sleep in a vacant
infirmary or dormitory someplace,” he said with a deep frown. “I suppose I had
wrongly thought that I would be treated like family while staying here, but
perhaps I would have been better off being set up in an inn someplace…”
“No!” Ciel blurted out, holding petite hands out in front of himself. If
Sebastian left, not only would his father be furious, Ciel would never be able
to forgive himself for letting him get away. “We… we usually have more than
just one overnight guest at a time, so that wing is generally much more lively
when we have visitors from out of town,” the boy explained in a rush. “It was
inconsiderate of me not to consider how awkward it might be for you to be so
far removed from the rest of the household. Please, allow me to change you room
to something more suitable.”
“I suppose, if it wouldn’t be too much trouble for you.”
He looked disinterested, even bored, and Ciel’s stomach began to roll with
nerves.
The teen knew he couldn’t place Sebastian with the servants, and the only other
option was the wing where he and his parents’ bedrooms were. It was sure to be
a slap in the face for him to offer his own bedroom to Sebastian and for Ciel
to move into the master suite – Sebastian was a guest after all. He should be
treated to the best.
“The master suite is next to my bedroom,” Ciel said quickly in a desperate
effort to please Sebastian. “It’s really the only room near mine that’s
suitable for a guest. I’m sure my father wouldn’t mind; he’d want you to be
comfortable…”
“If you really think so,” the older man hummed, and Ciel nodded his head
sharply.
“Please, Sebastian,” the boy insisted. “I’ll have the servants move your
luggage at once.”
The raven haired man smiled slyly, reaching across the table and grabbing onto
Ciel’s hand.
“Such a sweet boy,” he murmured, running his thumb over the speechless kitten’s
knuckles. “So concerned for my comfort.”
Ciel stared at Sebastian in silence, confused by his sudden change of
disposition. Only moments earlier he seemed prepared to leave the estate over a
bedroom that wasn’t to his liking, and now he had taken Ciel’s hand and was
caressing it.
“I was hoping we could go for a walk in the garden, but you’ve barely touched
your breakfast,” he crooned, and Ciel chewed on his lip nervously. He had lost
his appetite the moment Sebastian indicated that his first night at the manor
hadn’t been a pleasant one, and Ciel wasn’t sure his stomach was prepared to
hold down a heavy breakfast.
“I’m really not hungry,” Ciel said with a small shrug, his eyes flicking to
Sebastian curiously when the older man cocked his head.
“The servants won’t tattle on you to your parents, will they?”
Ciel felt as though he’d like to disappear, shrinking beneath the other man’s
amused stare. Now Sebastian had proven it. He really didthink of Ciel as a
child. Had Ciel somehow misread some of Sebastian’s gestures when they were
actually just innocent? The boy’s mouth fell open and he was tempted to run
from the room and toss himself onto his bed, if only his legs would cooperate.
He was frozen.
“Oh darling, it was only a joke,” the older man teased with a mischievous glint
in his eyes, lacing his fingers through Ciel’s. “I doubt they would call
attention to such trivial things. Is your father really so strict that he’d
punish you for an unfinished meal?”
“No,” Ciel whispered, his mind whirling. None of this was funny at all –
particularly not to Ciel. He was already feeling rather sensitive about how
Sebastian perceived him, and the implications of what he said, whether joking
or not, made the kitten tense and anxious. His neko ears pressed back and he
frowned, his tail curling close to his body and wrapping into his lap.
“Come join me for a walk?” he said without waiting for a response, releasing
Ciel’s hand and getting up from his chair to walk around to the teen’s side of
the table. “I promise, no more jokes.”
Ciel glanced at Sebastian’s outstretched hand and took it, allowing the older
gentleman to escort him out into the gardens that wrapped around the manor. At
once he was hit with nostalgia, and he tightened his grip on Sebastian’s hand
and walked a bit closer to him.
This felt right; like what they used to have before Sebastian had gone away and
left him with only his memories.
“I remember when I was just a little thing, dragging you off to a tea party to
show you off to the other children,” Ciel said in a small, testing tone, a tiny
smile playing across his lips. “It was just like today, warm and sunny. You had
to go fetch a wicker chair because the one I had for you was too small.”
“Mmm, yes,” he murmured, looking down at the boy’s sparkling eyes. “The garden
was just as beautiful as it is today, though not nearly as beautiful as you.”
Ciel gave him a lopsided grin, one that reflected his reaction to his comment.
It was a compliment; Sebastian had just called him beautiful – but he hadn’t
remembered the tea party.
“We weren’t here, we were at a garden party somewhere else,” Ciel explained, a
shred of disappointment apparent in his voice. “I gave you lemonade with milk
in it instead of tea and you drank it anyway and told me it was delicious… do
you remember now?”
The older man chuckled, shaking his head as the spring breeze tousled his black
hair. “Ah, now I remember, yes, you gave me that concoction and you were so
proud of yourself. I wouldn’t dare to disappoint such a precious boy.”
“It must have been disgusting,” Ciel said, relaxing then just slightly. So
maybe Sebastian hadn’t been replaying their time together over and over in his
mind for the past decade. He was a busy man, after all. At least Ciel had been
able to jog his memory.
“Oh, it wasn’t all that bad,” he said with a wink, stopping at a wrought iron
bench and presenting it to Ciel. “I’ve had far worse beverages than that. Some
that gave me a lot of regrets in the morning.”
Ciel took a seat on the bench, watching Sebastian with an uneasy smile as he
said beside him. For whatever reason, Ciel didn’t much like the idea of
Sebastian drinking too much alcohol – so much that he was sorry for it the
following day. It meant he was likely attending parties and socializing with
powerful and wealthy people – while Ciel was at home, in another country,
dreaming about being with him.
Of course Sebastian could barely remember their tea party. He’d probably
attended hundreds of real parties since they’d last parted.
“So, how has it been in France?” Ciel tried to ask casually, folding his hands
in his lap. “Have you liked it there?”
“It has its ups and downs, though for the most part I’ve enjoyed myself. The
wine and cuisine are beyond compare, much like the women,” he laughed lightly.
“Far more beautiful than the ones England has to offer. I suppose all the good
food and drink has done them well.”
Ciel’s blood ran cold and tears sprang to his wide eyes. It was exactly what he
had feared – that while he was busy growing up, Sebastian was getting on with
his life over in France. Of course he’d had lovers and hadn’t been thinking
about Ciel, a mere child that had been pining for him in a most absurd way.
It didn’t make the words sting any less, however, and the kitten’s ears
flattened against his head.
Maybe Ciel had been younger, but even during his absence, he’d thought only of
Sebastian.
“But, none of them were as beautiful as you,” the raven-haired man crooned,
grasping the boy’s chin and turning his face to toward his own. “Oh,
sweetheart, don’t tell me that my little comment has made you jealous?”
Ciel couldn’t even look into Sebastian’s eyes, instead dropping them down and
to the side. It was embarrassing to be so hurt by something so ridiculous, all
because of some silly fairytale he had made up in his mind. It had never been
real; it was a one-sided crush that Ciel had allowed himself to obsess over for
as far back as he could even remember.
Jealousy was ugly and embarrassing and certainly not fitting for someone of his
social standing.
Ciel knew he needed to block it out, numb the searing pain he felt in his
chest, but the revelation was like a knife in his heart.
“What if I told you that not even the most beautiful French girls were half as
gorgeous as you?” he asked the silent boy, watching his pale pink lip tremble
as he tried to hold back tears. “You’re just as precious as ever,” he murmured,
cupping Ciel’s cheek with his hand and running his thumb beneath the boy’s eye,
pressing his lower lid so that the fat tear would spill over onto his warm
digit. “Such innocence.”
“What good is my beauty if you’ll forever see me as a child?” Ciel asked,
sucking in a deep breath and holding it. Sebastian had told him he was
beautiful for as far back as he could remember, but it didn’t mean much when it
came down to it. His mother told him he was beautiful, but she didn’t want to
marry him. It was merely an observation, not a statement of intention. Even
still, it hurt his pride terribly. He was well groomed, born and bred to be
nothing short of nobility and he had the looks, brains and class to back it up.
“I have more to offer than any of those French girls do.”
“Indeed, you do,” he agreed, finally drawing Ciel’s eyes to his own with his
stare. “Do you mean to tell me you’re all grown now, Ciel? Heaven knows I’ve
been waiting for the day…”
Ciel’s eyebrows lifted and he straightened his back, nodding against
Sebastian’s hand. “Yes,” he breathed, blinking and allow the tears he’d been
holding to fall down his porcelain cheeks in two dignified, wet trails.
“Sebastian, I’m not a child anymore. But, even when I was… you were…” Ciel
swallowed and shut his eyes, trying desperately to hold himself together. “I
never wanted you to leave me.”
A lump formed in Ciel’s throat and he clung to Sebastian’s words like a life
vessel.
He’d been waiting for him to grow up.
“From the first moment I saw you, I longed to be with you,” the older man
whispered, slipping his free hand into Ciel’s in the boy’s lap. “Your father…”
he sighed, shaking his head sadly. “I don’t want to speak ill of your father,
he is a good man, but I believe he was terribly misguided when it came to you
and I. He knew how I felt about you, but sent me away regardless. He was
certain you weren’t grown enough to leave your parents, even though I would
have given you everything you needed. We could have been together all this
time, if only your father would have allowed it.”
“Together?” Ciel asked, his heart thumping wildly. “You mean, you felt
something for me, too? All this time?” He was stunned, and it was as though the
world had stopped spinning for as halted in shock as he was. “You wanted to be
with me?”
“How could anyone look into those eyes and not fall for you?” the older male
asked, leaning in to press his lips against Ciel’s parted ones and draw him
closer as his hand slipped from the boy’s cheek to the back of his head.
Ciel melted into the kiss, heavy eyelids slamming shut and his lips soft and
supple, begging to be tasted and licked. This was heaven, and quite literally
the teen’s dream come true.
“Sebastian,” Ciel exhaled sharply, clinging to Sebastian’s hand with his own.
He had been waiting for this moment for so long, for Sebastian to return to him
and kiss him, but it ended far too suddenly.
“Oh dear, I’m sorry young master!” the gardener exclaimed, dropping his hedge
clippers onto the cobblestone pathway with a clang. The blond’s face was nearly
as red as Ciel’s with embarrassment, and he backed away stammering. “I didn’t
see anything, not much, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were entertaining Mr.
Michaelis in the garden. I… I don’t mean entertaining like… what I meant is…”
“Enough!” Ciel snapped, his hands balling up into fists. “Just go!”
The gardener boy scampered away, and Ciel was nearly ready to scream with
frustration.
“I suppose a little privacy is completely out of the question with so many
servants around.” He patted Ciel’s thigh, standing up from the bench and
straightening his tie. “A shame, really. I’d hoped to have a private
conversation with you this evening, but I’m afraid it will have to wait until
your father comes home and gets his staff under control.”
Ciel stayed put on the bench, staring in disbelief at Sebastian. He’d be damned
if he was going to wait a week or more to hear whatever it was Sebastian wanted
to discuss! If the kiss they’d just shared was any indication, it could be a
confession of the older man’s love for him!
“You needn’t worry,” Ciel said lowly, his jaw tight with determination. “I will
get my servants under control.”
He would make certain that the next time Sebastian kissed him, no one would be
around to ruin it for him.
***************************************
Sebastian was delighted when he received an invitation to attend the Christmas
ball at Phantomhive Manor. He had heard rumors of its elegance and how Vincent
was known to reward some of his most appreciated business partners with a
variety of gifts, favors and accolades, though those were not the things he
most looked forward to.
It was to be the first time he’d see Ciel again after his last invitation to
the estate that fall.
Of course, it wasn’t due to any lack of effort on Sebastian’s part. He had
offered himself and his time to Vincent for the purposes of both business and
pleasure, but the kitten’s father had kept all of their interactions away from
the Manor and much to Sebastian’s dismay, Ciel hadn’t been present even once.
That didn’t mean Ciel was off the table as a topic of conversation, however.
Sebastian would always ask Vincent how his wife and son were doing and send his
best wishes to them, as any polite gentleman would, and occasionally it would
entice Vincent into talking to him about Ciel. Sebastian made a point of not
appearing too interested in the topic, lest he cause Vincent to worry about his
intentions and if he could be trusted.
Generally, after a few stiff cocktails, Vincent would lament the disgusting
propositions he’d receive in regards to his son, and Sebastian would nod along
stoically in agreement.
And he did agree with Vincent. Ciel was far too young for such salacious things
and deserved exactly what Vincent desired for him – to be betrothed to someone
that would love him and protect him, someone that would wait for him marry him
when he was old enough for such things. Ciel deserved a husband that would
treat him as the precious creature that he was, and none of the men in
Vincent’s ear had shown any proclivity toward being any sort of gentleman that
cared about Ciel’s best interests.
Even if the whole world should be damned and he and little Ciel were the only
two left, Sebastian would wait for him. Ciel deserved that and so much more,
and in the deepest depths of his heart, at that very moment in time, all
Sebastian wanted was to keep him safe from all of the threats that loomed
around him.
He couldn’t help that he felt better suited to it than Vincent.
It wasn’t that Vincent was a terrible father. He loved his son, if not perhaps
more superficially than Sebastian would like, and he did decline the
tremendously nauseating offers he had for Ciel.
No, it was more that it was clear to Sebastian that Ciel wasn’t his priority –
and for that matter, neither was Rachel. Vincent’s affairs with the Queen and
his business came first, and they put his family at risk. He was associating
with dangerous people, the sort that would have no qualms about using little
Ciel as leverage against Vincent if they ever were so inclined. And Vincent’s
judgment left much to be desired; taking Ciel to certain parties and affairs
and imbibing himself with spirits.
Vincent couldn’t be at his best or his sharpest after a few drinks, and adult
parties were no place for Ciel. It wasn’t to say that Ciel needed to be kept in
isolation, but that he shouldn’t be brought to social engagements full of drunk
men with less than pure backgrounds and thoughts.
As it was, Sebastian was picking up on things more and more, then relaying them
back to Vincent. Conversations other business associates had in his presence,
many of them rather foul as they discussed Ciel, goading each other on as to
who could be the most depraved.
It was all Sebastian could do not to slit their throats when they stumbled to
their carriages, drunk and reeking of tobacco.
The world would be better off.
Sebastian had warned Vincent each time, meeting him for a fine dinner or over
drinks at a member’s only lounge, telling him of the dreadful intent the men he
presumed to trust as associates had toward his only son.
It was only after a month of such meetings that Vincent confessed that
situations had escalated far beyond what even Sebastian had witnessed, though
Ciel had luckily been kept in the dark about the threats. It would do not good
to absolutely terrify the boy, Vincent had reasoned, explaining to Sebastian
that he had taught the kitten since he was old enough to move about on his own
that he needed to be proactive about his own safety.
Sebastian had felt ill, listening to Vincent confide that much more had
happened than men discussing their raunchy desires concerning Ciel with each
other. There had been threats and stalking, both of which worried Sebastian
deeply.
“It began like anyone else, with a compliment and an offer for him,” Vincent
had explained over several bottles of wine late one evening. “I had
respectfully declined, but he refused to take no for an answer. It was one
offer after another, more than I am sure he had to even give me, along with
invitations to a variety of contrived activities simply for the sake of him
having an opportunity to see Ciel. It had become an obsession for him, one that
drove him to threaten me if I continued to keep Ciel from him. I contacted the
authorities and things fell quiet for some time, until several months later I
heard our dog barking at a most peculiar time in the evening. It was long past
Ciel’s bedtime, but I went to check on him regardless, and I found him there,
in my son’s bedroom, standing over his bed while he slept. He had come in
through the door to his balcony and I am sure he was about to take him. Had I
not caught him, what he would have done to my son… I can’t even imagine. He was
a very sick man.”
Sebastian had gone rigid, listening to Vincent recount how Ciel had been in
imminent danger for quite a while, with obsessive, lecherous monsters that
couldn’t rightfully even be called suitors crossing every line of decency to
get the kitten into their possession. It was as though his blood had been
replaced with ice, snapping and breaking him apart from the inside out as he
heard just how very precarious Ciel’s wellbeing truly was.
And just as much as these aggressive and decidedly criminal men were a cause
for concern due to their frightening and threatening efforts to obtain Ciel,
Sebastian was just as concerned with what he perceived as a lack of action by
Vincent.
Vincent still associated with criminals and men of power that assumed they were
entitled to whatever pleasures they felt inclined toward. He still brought Ciel
along with him to parties where he drank and didn’t pay enough attention to his
son. Indeed, it had been his lack of responsibility that had caused Sebastian
to find little Ciel cowering and crying beneath a buffet table to begin with.
It was clear to Sebastian that Vincent loved money and power more than his son.
And while those men that sought to take Ciel from his father were far worse
than rivals to Sebastian – to a degree they shared a similar belief.
Vincent didn’t deserve the darling kitten.
He would be better off with Sebastian, the young man knew that to be the case.
There would be no superficiality to his devotion to the boy.
He would put Ciel’s happiness and safety before everything else – even if meant
less income, less power and a quieter life. There would be no need for balls
and clubs if he had Ciel to come home to. Sebastian firmly believed that the
kitten would be much happier to curl up in his lap in the evening in front of
the fire and be read stories and to spend rainy Saturday afternoon playing
games and sampling the batter while they baked together. Ciel needed love and
protection more than an inheritance and a father with ties to the monarchy.
But, there was little Sebastian could do about it.
The only play was to become as close as Vincent as possible and look out for
Ciel through him.
It pained Sebastian that he couldn’t be more present in Ciel’s life, though he
understood that if he truly ever wanted to claim him as his own he would need
an extraordinary amount of patience. That meant becoming as close to Vincent as
possible and earning his employer’s trust at all costs.
It didn’t matter that Sebastian knew if Ciel was sleeping beside him, no one
would dare attempt to kidnap him ever again.
He dug in his heels and told Vincent any secret he could to gain his favor,
worked extra hours and kept his nose clean. He turned away bribes and made sure
to inform Vincent immediately. The evening that prostitutes appeared at the
after-hours club they were having drinks at, Sebastian suggested to Vincent
that they should leave before the other man could even get in a world. He was
determined to prove to Vincent that he was exactly the sort of man he wanted
for his son – someone that would marry him and wouldn’t dishonor him or
humiliate their family name in any way.
Still, the nights leading up to the Christmas party were long, dark and rather
lonely. Sebastian could only imagine the little kitten’s excitement about the
upcoming holiday and how he must be running about the estate, wound up with
extra energy from all of the seasonal sweets and treats he was surely being
spoiled with.
He was bringing gifts for the host and hostess, and he had determined that
meant he could get away with a small gift for little Ciel without it seeming
too familiar. But, as he had walked through the streets in the finest areas of
London searching for what to give the boy, it was difficult to find something
that was modest enough not to draw unwanted attention and yet still befitting
of someone whose blood may as well run blue.
Sebastian finally settled upon a brooch over a toy, something Ciel could grow
up with and that the young man hoped he would still cherish the day he finally
had gotten Vincent’s approval to ask him for his hand. It was made up of
circular cut diamonds in a pattern of flowing swirls that when one looked
closely enough, just might see as small hearts. It was delicate and beautiful,
fitting for Ciel in every way.
He slipped his hand into his tuxedo pocket to triple check for the small box
wrapped in silvery fabric and tied with a blue satin ribbon as he made his way
through the grand entrance of Phantomhive Manor and toward the ballroom. There
were guests milling about everywhere, everyone dressed in their very best and
there to impress for the upcoming year. A few women tried to catch his eye as
he made his way through the crowds, though there was only one person he had
even the slightest interest in seeing.
And then, as if time was suddenly frozen and the rest of the world had faded
off into oblivion, he saw little Ciel across the crowded room.
The kitten had never looked more beautiful than he did then in the twinkling of
the light of thousands of candles.
He wore a luxurious deep blue velvet ball gown that was split down the front
with layers upon layers of delicate white lace underneath. The velvet was
trimmed with lace all around and where his full skirt attached to his fitted
bodice was a satin sash with a darling, white blossoming rose in the front. He
wore satin gloves that went to his elbows and had falls of several inches of
lace at the hems. His long, slate bangs were pinned back and away from his face
with a diamond encrusted barrette that sat between his neko ears like a small
tiara.
Sebastian was left breathless at the sight.
His feet carried him toward the boy that stood beside his parents, though
Sebastian barely noticed who Vincent was shaking hands with and greeting, so
fixated on Ciel that the music the orchestra was playing melded into something
truly unrecognizable and dreamlike.
Ciel was looking around the room, his pale little chin lifted as he tried to
see through all of the people that were so much taller than him. His ears were
perked, though not toward his parents’ conversation, his tail swaying idly
behind him in anticipation.
The corner of Sebastian’s lip quirked up into a smile and he wondered if just
maybe, Ciel was looking for him.
It couldn’t be such a stretch. The kitten had thought of him as a hero, had
accepted his offer to be his protector and had insisted on seeing him at his
last visit. They had formed a bond that wasn’t one-sided, Sebastian was sure of
it, and he would see to it that it was only nurtured as the years went on.
His suspicions were confirmed when Ciel’s sapphire eyes fell upon him and lit
up like dazzling jewels, and the boy gave his father’s pant-leg a sharp tug.
“Ciel,” he said warmly as he approached the small family, taking the boy’s tiny
hand kissing it as he bowed. Ciel blushed furiously, covering up his delighted
grin with his other gloved hand, his eyes wide and reflecting his excitement.
“Sebastian,” Vincent cut in, holding his hand out to shake with his business
partner. “Glad to see you, there are some people I’d like to introduce you to,”
he said, nodding toward two gentlemen that he’d been speaking to. He went on to
explain that they were in the business of procuring sugar cane, filling
Sebastian in on all of the mundane details of their dealings with Funtom.
Sebastian didn’t fail to notice the way the sparkle in Ciel’s eyes began to
fade as his father went on and on, dominating the conversation and effectively
excluding him from all of it. It had to be hard for the boy, Sebastian
reasoned, being dragged around to such affairs by his father only to be kept at
his knees like miniature arm candy. Not only must it be terribly boring for the
kitten, but Sebastian could see it hurt his spirit as well. Ciel clearly wanted
to speak with Sebastian – his glee at seeing the older man had arrived was
palpable. But, Sebastian’s attention had been stolen away by Vincent.
Or – so the boy thought.
Sebastian was only listening with half an ear, watching Ciel from the corner of
his eye and trying to figure out how he could cheer the little thing up. He was
far too beautiful to be so sad.
Sebastian took one of the drinks offered to him by a passing servant, lifting
an eyebrow at just how stiff it was. Vincent clearly didn’t mess around when he
threw a party, and by the end of the evening the guests were sure to be drunk
and loose.
That atmosphere was no place for Ciel.
His eyes fell onto the boy and Ciel was looking up at him in silence, soft pink
lips turned down in a frown.
Sebastian couldn’t allow this rudeness to continue.
The band began to play a popular waltz, and Sebastian caught Rachel’s tail
begin to sway to the music.
“You enjoy dancing?” Sebastian asked her smoothly, and she nodded and smiled
brightly.
“I do,” she confirmed, her eyes twitching. “This is one of my favorites.”
“Don’t let me keep your then!” Sebastian insisted, taking a step to the side to
give a path to the dance floor. “Go and enjoy your dance, we can talk later! We
have all evening.”
“Oh honey, let’s dance,” Rachel pleaded, pulling on Vincent’s arm much like
Sebastian imagined Ciel would.
“But, Ciel…” Vincent started and Sebastian shook his head.
“I will keep him company,” Sebastian said, giving Vincent a purposeful stare.
“He will be just fine, sir. I understand your concerns and will be an attentive
chaperone in your absence.”
“Very well,” Vincent said, less worrisome than Sebastian expected him to be as
he turned to lead his wife out to dance. It seemed that perhaps Vincent was
looking to enjoy himself and didn’t mind unloading Ciel onto someone he could
trust.
Sebastian was deeply pleased.
“Well then,” Sebastian said, turning to the highly attentive kitten who
appeared to have a bit of wind back in his sails. “It would be a waste of such
a beautiful ball gown for you to stand around at your father’s knees all
evening. May I have this dance?”
He held out his gloved hand to the stunned kitten, waiting far longer than he
expected for the boy’s response.
“I… I’m not a very good dancer,” Ciel whispered, and for a moment, Sebastian
thought he was about to burst into tears and run for it.
“Then you must not have had a very good teacher,” Sebastian said gently, still
offering his hand. “Allow me? It would be my pleasure.”
“I… well, okay,” Ciel said softly, placing his hand into Sebastian’s and
allowing the taller male to walk him to the dance floor.
Be it due to nerves or a lack of teaching or talent, Ciel truly did struggle
with the waltz, bumping into Sebastian’s legs and stepping onto his feet every
few seconds. He looked mortified, and it was no way for anyone to experience
their very first dance with a real partner, even if Ciel thought it was merely
charity.
“Let’s try this,” Sebastian suggested as he bent down and carefully picked Ciel
up so he could sit on his forearm. The boy quickly wrapped an arm over
Sebastian’s shoulder and behind his neck, his thick, black eyelashes batting
rapidly. “There now,” Sebastian murmured as he began to glide gracefully across
the floor with the boy, holding his other hand in his own. “Isn’t this lovely?”
Ciel nodded, starting to smile as they whirled around the room together.
“I must say I prefer this,” Sebastian told the delighted boy, allowing him to
be rocked and twirled across the floor like the little angel he was. “I’ve
always found dancing with a partner to be rather awkward and unpleasant, but
this works perfectly. And to think,” he murmured to the blushing boy, “I
couldn’t dance with anyone this way but you.”
“You don’t mind that I’m small?” Ciel asked with uncertainty and Sebastian
chuckled and shook his head.
“Kittens are meant to be small,” Sebastian assured him. “It’s part of their
charm.”
“I’ll never be big like you,” Ciel said, as though he was enlightening
Sebastian with some sort of elusive secret. “Because I’m a neko. Even when I’m
grown up, I’ll be little.”
“And you will be darling as ever,” Sebastian said smoothly, noticing they’d
caught the eyes of many of the party guests with their dancing but paying them
no mind. Let them all gossip and wonder if it meant something that Vincent had
allowed such a thing, for his son to be dancing with a potential husband. It
bode well for Sebastian’s ego – he had grown tired of hearing the rumors that
Ciel had been promised to an old friend of Vincent’s or was going to be kept by
his father himself.
He looked forward to dancing with Ciel this way at their wedding, and he
assured himself in that very moment, with the boy smiling shyly at him from his
heartfelt compliments, that he would make that happen. Sebastian needed that
promise from Vincent – that someday, he would be the man allowed to marry Ciel.
An official engagement would quell the ugly rumors and send a message to most
of the other men interested in pursuing Ciel that it was a dead end. Sure,
there might be a few that would still be aggressive and attempt to usurp the
engagement, but once Sebastian was Ciel’s fiancé, he would have every right to
handle any of those men himself.
Ciel would look his most beautiful that day, draped in yards of lace and
chiffon and a cathedral veil affixed between his perky neko ears.
Sebastian would be the luckiest man in England when he carried him away from
the festivities and to their carriage to bring his new wife home to stay.
There was a dreamy look in the boy’s eyes, and Sebastian knew he was feeling as
special as he indeed was. They had the attention of most everyone now, but Ciel
didn’t seem to notice; he was completely transfixed with Sebastian.
Dancing with Sebastian was like a dream come true. For as long as Ciel could
remember, when he had been brought along to balls with his parents he had been
left out of nearly all of the fun. He had longed to be asked to dance, even at
his young age and in spite of his lack of ability, if for only to feel like one
of the princesses in the fairy tales his father would read him.
It was a Cinderella moment for him, even though he hadn’t been banished to a
dark tower and forced to act as a servant. He had finally been noticed by a
dashing man that as far as little Ciel was concerned was very much a real life
prince, and that man gave him his attention and treated him like he was a
princess.
The song ended far too soon, but since Ciel didn’t wiggle in his arms,
Sebastian made no move to put him down. He shifted the boy so he’d be to his
side and able to face outward as they made their way off the dance floor and
toward a table set up with drinks. He fetched one for both Ciel and himself,
and nearly tripped as he turned around to a gentleman he was unfamiliar with at
his back.
“Sebastian Michaelis, is it?” the man asked, extending his hand to Sebastian to
shake. Both of Sebastian’s hands were full and he had no interest in putting
Ciel down, so he simply nodded.
“It is, good evening,” he replied plainly. He had no interest in chatting up
anyone while he had everything he wanted in his arms.
“My sister was watching you dance and well, she wouldn’t be so forward as to
ask you herself, but I think she would be delighted if you would dance with
her. She’s rather beautiful if I say so myself and a lovely dancer. I didn’t
think you’d mind having a turn with a proper partner; might I introduce you?”
Ciel’s ears turned backward and he narrowed his eyes at the man, his fingers
digging into the lapel of Sebastian’s tuxedo. He’d hiss at him if he wasn’t
certain it would result in a severe scolding from his father and removal from
the party, and Ciel knew at that point if he was punished that he would spend
the remainder of the evening sobbing in his bedroom.
Still, it wasn’t fair at all. Sebastian had asked him to dance and they were
having a good time – at least Ciel thought they were. Just because he was
young, it shouldn’t mean that someone else should be able to steal away his
dancing partner.
“I’ll have to respectfully decline,” Sebastian said smoothly, pulling the
kitten just a bit closer to his body. “I’m more than pleased with the dancing
partner I already have.”
Ciel’s eyes flicked away from the other man to Sebastian, and the precious boy
looked so hopeful, Sebastian’s heart clenched in his chest. Sebastian wouldn’t
abandon him for someone else, not for anyone else, no matter how beautiful or
talented they were. His heart already belonged to Ciel.
The other man nodded, seemingly not understanding the depth of Sebastian’s
statement. “If you’re otherwise indisposed for the evening, perhaps you could
bring her a drink?”
Ciel blinked rapidly, understanding the implication of what the man was
suggesting, even though he was sure the idiot thought it would go right over
his head. He thought that Sebastian was effectively nothing more than a
babysitter, burdened with the responsibility of tending to Ciel while his
parents enjoyed their Christmas party.
The kitten couldn’t remember ever feeling quite so offended.
“Again, I’ll have to decline your offer,” Sebastian said more coolly, a
darkness in his eyes that made the other man take a step back. “You’re being
rather rude to Young Master Phantomhive and I’m going to have to ask you to
leave us alone.”
The man finally glanced at Ciel, his eyebrows lifting at just how furiously the
boy was glaring at him, then back to Sebastian. “I see,” he said, as though he
just finally understood that Sebastian was angling to be far more than a
babysitter, as many of the men that saw Ciel did, and he ran a hand through his
hair awkwardly. “My apologies.”
Sebastian turned away from him then, putting some distance between them and
tightening his grip on Ciel.
“What a rude man,” Sebastian tutted, looking down at the boy still clinging to
him in a death grip. “To even presume I’m not having a wonderful time with
you.”
“Are you?” Ciel asked hesitantly, little ears still turned back as though he
was ashamed or fearful. He was young, but he wasn’t so naïve to think that
Sebastian might have a better time in the company of most anyone else at the
party. The fact that he was mostly ignored said volumes to him.
“Am I enjoying myself with you?” Sebastian chuckled, setting his empty glass
down on the tray of a passing servant. “Ciel, you are by far the most
interesting and entertaining person at any of these affairs.” Sebastian brushed
the back of his gloved fingertips gently over the boy’s blushed cheek. “The
truth is I find most of it all rather boring. Listening to drunk businessmen
ramble on about their money is insufferable and if it weren’t for your company,
I’d rather be at home reading a good book in front of the fire.”
“You really mean that?” Ciel asked in wonderment. No one had ever called him
interesting before, not even his own parents.
“I promised I’d never lie to you, didn’t I?” Sebastian asked warmly, tucking a
finger beneath the boy’s chin and lifting it. “You are delightful company.”
“More so than my father?” Ciel asked with a quirk of his thin eyebrow that made
Sebastian laugh.
“Infinitely,” Sebastian swore, grinning at the boy.
“But, you spend a lot of time with him, but not me,” Ciel pointed out, his
lower lip pouting out in a painfully adorable way. “You don’t come to my
house.”
“I come when I am invited,” Sebastian reminded the boy, taking a seat on one of
the velvet chairs lining the walls and settling Ciel into his lap. “I’d be
happy to see you more often, but it would be improper for me to come over
uninvited.”
“But, I invite you,” Ciel insisted, brows furrowing as he considered what
Sebastian had told him. “I ask all the time for you to come over.”
The boy blinked, his head cocked to one side. Was his father not passing along
his invitations to Sebastian? That seemed rather rude and unfair. If his father
could spend time with Sebastian, why couldn’t he?
Sebastian could see the kitten piecing things together as the expressions on
his doll-like face shifted from confusion to hurt. It was dangerous, where this
conversation was headed, and Sebastian was wise enough to know it. For as much
as he wanted to gently pull Ciel toward him, he had to be careful about causing
any conflict between him and his father. The worst thing he could do would be
to make Vincent an enemy or give him reasons to want to keep him from Ciel.
“Hmm, but it isn’t really proper etiquette for you to be inviting me, is it?”
Sebastian asked gently, tipping his head down to the little kitten to look into
his sullen eyes. “I should be extending invitations to your father, ones that
include you, just as I’d like. I’m afraid he’s been so busy with the company
that I haven’t felt comfortable asking him to do anything for pleasure, but
what if I promise to change that in the new year? Would you like that?”
Ciel nodded his head, his long, slate tail curling beautifully behind him. “I
would. Can I come to your house?”
Sebastian cleared his throat to buy himself a moment to think. He was a
bachelor and just starting off, and as such his apartment was rather small and
unimpressive. It would be awkward to have Vincent and Rachel come to such a
place, given the sort of social circles and affairs they were accustomed to.
Little Ciel, however, would probably enjoy his time there very much. It was
quiet and cozy, an ideal fit for a kitten, and Sebastian would give him so much
attention that it would likely be a day Ciel would cherish for always.
Unfortunately, Sebastian knew he couldn’t ever ask such a thing of Vincent – to
have Ciel over alone as a guest. No matter what his intentions, Vincent
wouldn’t agree to such a thing until they were married, and Sebastian had his
work cut out for him before they would ever get to that point.
“Someday you can,” was Sebastian’s careful response, and he tucked a stray hair
behind Ciel’s human ear. “Though I think once I had you around to play games
with, I’d never want you to leave.”
Ciel blushed heavily, going quiet in Sebastian’s lap. He wouldn’t mind at all
going to stay at Sebastian’s house. Even if he’d never been separated from his
parents, he had an inkling in the pit of his belly that he wouldn’t be
frightened at all if he was with Sebastian.
The boy noticed Sebastian’s expression change just slightly, and he looked over
his shoulder to see his parents approaching. He frowned and tightened his grip
on Sebastian’s jacket. He didn’t want them to come and take him away.
“There you are,” Rachel said cheerfully, holding onto her husband’s hand. “Your
father and I were looking for you!”
“Oh,” Ciel said quietly, his eyes falling away from them and into his lap. Now
he would be dragged away from the one person that actually talked with him to
be a spectator to one boring conversation of his father’s after another until
he fell asleep. It wasn’t fair.
“We saw you dancing,” she continued, winking at Sebastian. “You were so cute!”
“We had a great time,” Sebastian said, patting the boy soothingly on the back.
“You looked so lovely out there, it inspired us to join in.”
“Oh, I do appreciate you spending time with Ciel so we could have a dance
together!” Rachel exclaimed warmly. “It’s always so difficult when you are
hosting to find even a moment for yourselves, especially with a little one that
needs so much attention.”
“We do appreciate it,” Vincent confirmed, slipping an arm around his happy
wife. “Rachel and I don’t get to dance much anymore, but that’s parenthood.”
Ciel looked absolutely miserable, though his parents either didn’t notice or
didn’t care, and Sebastian couldn’t help but feel sorry for him. He really must
feel like both a burden and an accessory.
“If the two of you would like to have the rest of the evening to yourselves, I
really don’t mind taking responsibility for Ciel,” Sebastian said, directing
his statement toward Rachel, as she seemed most inclined to jump on the offer.
“You worked so hard to put together such a delightful party, it would be a
shame if you weren’t able to enjoy it yourselves.”
Vincent looked uncertain, sighing heavily and shaking his head. “I don’t know,
that’s a bit much to ask of someone. And besides, I think Ciel should be with
us. He is a host, too, and should be greeting our guests along with us.”
“Daddy, please,” Ciel said suddenly, turning in Sebastian’s lap to face his
father. “It is so boring when you drag me around and talk about your work.
Sebastian actually talks to me, and he likes looking after me, don’t you
Sebastian?”
Sebastian looked carefully at Vincent, trying to get a read on the boy’s
father. If he looked too interested, it would raise Vincent’s hackles
immediately.
“I’ll admit, it’s a nice change of pace for me,” he said with a light chuckle,
earning a smile from Rachel. “Would it be terrible of me if I admitted I get
rather bored with the same conversations that Ciel dislikes so much?”
“Not at all,” Rachel laughed, agreeing with Sebastian. “I tune most of them out
after my third drink.”
Vincent watched the light interaction between his wife and subordinate
pensively, then nodded over his shoulder. “Sebastian, a word?”
It wasn’t missed by Sebastian that Ciel looked to him instead of his father,
and he wanted terribly to embrace the kitten and tell him it would all be okay.
He couldn’t, and it stoked his frustration with Vincent. It was apparent to
everyone that Ciel enjoyed his company and Sebastian had no intention of
hurting the boy, so why force him into such a charade?
“Of course,” Sebastian said, instead of what he was thinking, and he carefully
slid the reluctant kitten from his lap and to the floor.
“Is everything alright?” Sebastian asked after they had taken a few steps away
Vincent’s family, enough that they wouldn’t be over to hear their conversation
over the music and crowd, but close enough that the Earl could grab them both
at a moment’s notice.
“I want to trust you, Sebastian,” Vincent said coolly, “but I have my concerns.
I hope you can understand my apprehension.”
It was as Sebastian had expected, and he was prepared to handle it skillfully.
“From the moment that I met Ciel, before I even knew he was your son, I’ve done
what I can to protect him,” Sebastian started, placing a hand on Vincent’s
shoulder. “I am your friend and I care about your family. Ciel’s safety is
important to me, and I wouldn’t ever harm him myself – not physically or
emotionally.”
“Yes, but it is usually the ones that we keep closest to us that knife us in
the back,” Vincent said darkly. “The ones that have earned our trust have the
ability to exploit it.”
“But, I brought him back to you,” Sebastian reminded him, grabbing onto his
forearm and leaning in. “If I was the sort of man you worry about, I’d have
brought him home with me that night and you never would have known. But, I
didn’t. I returned him to you immediately, before I even knew his father was
anyone of consequence, I was already set on bringing him back to where he
belonged.” Sebastian took a step back, lifting his eyebrows. “If I didn’t take
him or harm him then, why on Earth would I do so now? Any concerns you have
regarding me just aren’t logical or rational in the least.”
“I suppose you’re right,” Vincent sighed, looking over at his despondent son.
“But he’s grown rather… attached to you since that incident, and I worry that
feeding into it will only lead to a broken heart and problems for me in the
future.”
“I will never be the cause of Ciel suffering a broken heart,” Sebastian swore,
placing a hand over his own chest. “Just this evening I was propositioned to
dance with another young lady in front of Ciel and I turned her down outright.
I knew it would hurt him terribly, and that’s the last thing I want to do. I
care about his well-being; I hope someday you’ll believe that.”
Vincent looked at him warily, then over to his hopeful wife.
“Don’t make me sorry,” he warned, and Sebastian shook his head.
“Sir, I wouldn’t dare.”
Vincent returned to his family with Sebastian beside him, and the pouting boy
stared at the floor, clearly expecting his father to drag him away from the
person he most wanted to be with.
“You don’t leave Sebastian’s sight, Ciel,” Vincent said firmly, and the
kitten’s head shot up in surprise, his sparkling blue eyes wide as ever.
“Without me, you’ll need to be extra careful, so pay attention and stay close
to him.”
Sebastian grit his teeth at the comment, as if his caregiving was somehow
inferior to Vincent’s. It was patently ridiculous, as Sebastian gave Ciel every
bit of his attention and was sober as well. It was a hit to the young man’s
pride not to point out that he wasn’t the one that had drunkenly lost Ciel at a
party only a few months earlier, but such a statement wouldn’t do at all.
“Daddy, I will,” Ciel snapped impatiently, making a show of grabbing onto
Sebastian’s hand, much to the older male’s delight.
“Have fun, sweetheart,” Rachel said lightly, kissing her son on the cheek
before walking away with her husband who looked over his shoulder at Sebastian
several times before disappearing in the crowd.
When Sebastian looked down at the kitten, he was beaming up at him with a smile
that was brighter than a thousand candles and Sebastian couldn’t help but
chuckle.
“You look pleased.”
“You saved me!” the boy exclaimed, turning to Sebastian and hugging around his
legs tightly. He rubbed his cheek against the taller male’s leg and Sebastian
pet his hand gently through the kitten’s soft, smooth hair.
“I’d never do anything less,” Sebastian promised warmly, lost for a moment in
the boy’s innocent affection. “You deserve the best, Ciel.”
He meant it, every word of it. He’d give everything to the little kitten, if
only his father would allow it.
“Then help me find the dessert table,” the boy suggested, craning his neck to
look up at Sebastian with perked ears.
There was no way Sebastian could say no to the darling little thing.
“Of course,” Sebastian said smoothly, taking Ciel’s hand and guiding him away
from the dance floor and toward the walls lined with buffet tables. The walked
together, Sebastian taking short steps so the tiny kitten could keep up with
him, until they reached the dessert set up.
There were cakes and pies, macaroons and marzipan, just about every sort of
confection or delight imaginable, and Ciel’s eyes lit up in anticipation. He
snatched a cookie that was covered in powdered sugar from the table, just as
several drunk adults began to reach over him to grab their own treats.
Sebastian’s eyes narrowed and he was tempted to ask them if they realized just
who this boy was, their behavior rude and classless, but decided against it
when he noticed just how uncomfortable the little kitten had become.
He bent down and scooped Ciel up into his arms, making him taller than the
adults that had been closing in all around him, and spirited him away from the
table and toward the door to the patio.
“Why don’t we get a little air,” he suggested to the boy, receiving only a nod
in response as Ciel took a bite of his cookie.
It was a clear night and the cool air was immediately refreshing as they
stepped outside and away from all of the loud sounds of drunk adults and music.
There was enough of a chill in the air that they could see their breath and it
kept most of the guests inside, though Ciel didn’t seem to mind the cold. He
nestled a bit closer to Sebastian in his arms, happily eating his cookie and
looking up at the night sky, speckled with thousands of stars and a bright,
full moon.
“I have something for you,” Sebastian murmured, reaching into his pocket as
Ciel popped the last bit of his cookie past his sugar coated lips and into his
mouth. He pulled the little package out and placed it into the kitten’s hands,
his ears twitching with interest.
“A present!” he mewed in the most charming way, and Sebastian couldn’t help but
grin broadly. The little thing could barely contain his excitement.
He made quick work of the wrapping, revealing the brooch with a tiny gasp and
looking up at Sebastian in disbelief. Ciel had enough awareness to understand
that it was a very expensive, grown up gift, and the corners of his eyes
crinkled as he smiled larger than Sebastian had ever seen.
“Do you like it?” Sebastian asked, his heart swelling at the genuine joy that
radiated from Ciel at being given such a special present from him.
“I love it,” Ciel whispered, his tail swaying behind him. “It’s beautiful.”
“It will only look more beautiful once it is on you,” Sebastian murmured,
taking the diamond brooch from the boy’s hand and tilting his head. “May I?”
Ciel nodded, his tiny button nose twitching with delight and pride as Sebastian
pinned the gift to the collar of his gown.
“There,” he said, pleased with how gorgeous it looked in contrast to the dark
blue velvet. “A perfect fit for the Princess of Phantomhive.”
Ciel boosted himself in Sebastian’s arms and – quite unexpectedly – caught the
young man’s face with his tiny hands and pressed his sugar coated lips against
Sebastian’s cheek.
It only lasted a moment before Sebastian pulled back, stunned, his eyes
blinking rapidly and for the very first time, losing his composure in the
kitten’s presence. In spite of how innocent it was, he couldn’t allow it to
continue, even if it was the very thing he was sure Ciel did often with his
mother and father and anyone else close to him that he adored.
It was a familiarity that he was certain Vincent wouldn’t approve of, even if
it was nothing but pure.
Ciel was still smiling at him, unfazed by Sebastian’s awkward, uncomfortable
silence and stiffness.
“Sebastian, out of everyone, I like you the best,” the kitten said simply, and
Sebastian let out a breath.
“I like you the best, too,” he whispered, cupping the back of the boy’s head
when he curled up against him and tucked his head beneath his chin. The kitten
rested his head on his shoulder, tracing his fingers over the brooch as
Sebastian carried him back inside the manor. Sebastian wiped off the sugar that
clung to his cheek with his finger and nuzzled his cheek against the boy’s
hair, keeping him close and protected.
When Vincent came to collect his son, he found him asleep in Sebastian’s arms,
completely at peace and drooling on Sebastian’s tuxedo jacket while the young
man spoke quietly with other party guests.
Vincent didn’t need to demand to have Ciel back this time, he accepted
Sebastian’s offer to follow him up to his bedroom with the kitten. He placed
Ciel on his grand, four poster bed, and his gown splayed around him like he was
truly a little princess.
If Sebastian had anything to say about it, Ciel would never be treated as
anything less.
Chapter End Notes
     Thank you for reading and your patience! <3 I know I've been slow
     with updates, but I'm still working on this :)
     If you want to help me with my Ciel muse (my biggest obstacle right
     now in updating this) you can always send me messages on Tumblr and
     we can talk about the story - @leviheichouackerman
     Thank you so much to @Minty17 for beta-reading this for me! <3
     Chapter title from Cyndi Lauper's Time After Time
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