Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/464965.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M, Multi
  Fandom:
      Supernatural
  Relationship:
      Castiel/Dean_Winchester/Sam_Winchester, Dean_Winchester/Sam_Winchester
  Additional Tags:
      Underage_Character, Frottage, Masturbation, Kissing, Oral_Sex, Comeplay,
      Threesome_-_M/M/M, Porn
  Stats:
      Published: 2012-07-21 Chapters: 4/4 Words: 9711
****** How To Say I Love You ******
by saltandbyrne
Summary
     Dean decides that Sam needs a little brother of his own. They adopt
     Castiel and show him how to be a Winchester.
Notes
     Please read the warnings. I debated about owning up to this one, but
     it grew on me, and we all know I am going to special hell with bells
     on anyway. Everything is enthusiastically consensual and schmoopy,
     but if underage isn't your thing, it's not your thing. Mostly Cas
     POV. Cas is 12.
***** Chapter 1 *****
Sam and Dean Winchester don't exist.
 
They're alive, of course, living and breathing and fucking their way across the
country. They just don't exist on paper.
 
John had figured out that the easiest way to get CPS off his back was to get
rid of the paper trail leading back to his sons' suspicious bruises and
absenteeism from school.
 
As far as the law was concerned, Sam and Dean had died in a car crash when Sam
was eight. John himself hadn't lasted much longer, wrapping himself around a
tree for real when Sam was 12.
 
Sam was 19 now, and while he said he loved his life with Dean, he'd been
distant lately, staring out the passenger window and not complaining about how
loud Dean blasted AC/DC.
 
"You don't really need me any more, Dean," Sam had said to him one night,
curled up in Dean's arms, head snugged on his big brother's chest.
 
"Sammy, how can you say that? I'll always need you." Dean had kissed him and
turned out the light.
 
How could Sam possibly think that Dean didn't need him? Dean needed Sam more
than anything, needed to take care of him and keep him safe and keep him
happy.Sam would understand if he were a big brother, understand that Dean loved
him so much he'd never let him go.
 
Dean thinks he knows what's wrong when he sees Sammy talking to the boy in
Ohio, comforting him while Dean assures his mother that the poltergeist in her
house is definitely not coming back.
Sam seems wistful as they drive away, silent next to Dean until Dean reaches
out to pull him close, Sam under his arm as he drives.
 
"S'matter, Sammy?"
 
"I don't know, Dean, sometimes I just wish we had a bigger family, you know?"
 
Dean nods his head, all of it starting to make sense. Sam needs a little
brother of his own, someone to take care of and play with just like Dean had.
 
"I'm lucky to have a little brother like you, Sammy. Wish we could have another
brother so you could know how great it is to be a big brother, have someone to
take care of like I take care of you."
Sam sighs against him, quiet on their way back to the motel.
 
Later that night, while Dean's cock is softening in Sam's ass, brothers still
connected like they have been since Sam was 13, Dean hugs his little brother.
 
"I think it'd be fun, Sammy, we could find some poor kid who doesn't have a
family, take him in, take care of him. We could make him a Winchester, teach
him everything we know."
 
Sam breathes against Dean's neck. "It'd be nice not to be the baby brother for
once."
 
"You'll be such a good big brother, Sammy." Dean kisses him. "After all, you
learned from the best."
 
Sam smiles at him, shifts his hips and crawls on top of Dean.
 
"I sure did. Remember when I learned this?"
 
Sam spends the rest of the night showing Dean exactly what he'll teach their
new little brother.
*
They find him two months later, at an orphanage in Missouri.
 
The place is run by a nun whose pinched face and fancy car tell Sam and Dean
everything they need to know.
 
Finding a little brother had been hard. They couldn't adopt someone, not when
they themselves were just ghosts without any real ID. They needed someone who
was as off the books as they were, someone who wouldn't need to go to school or
check in with nosy caseworkers.
 
It's pathetically easy to talk the woman into essentially selling them a child.
 
"We have several that no one will come looking for."
 
They both see him at the same time. He's beautiful, huge blue eyes and soft
black hair. The nun tells them his name is Castiel, that he doesn't speak much
or get along with the other children.
 
Sam feels so angry at how easy it is to take him. What if they wanted to hurt
him? Dean calms him down and reminds him that Castiel will have a better life
with them than he will in there, that they're going to make him so happy and
take good care of him.
 
Dean puts his arm around Sam as they hand over the money. He's so excited for
Sam to be a big brother, for all the love in their family to grow that much
greater.
*
Castiel can't believe they picked him. Families came and picked out boys once
in a while, but it was a very rare and special thing.
 
And the men who take Castiel are amazing. Their names are Sam and Dean. They're
brothers and they have the coolest car Castiel has ever seen. They're handsome,
too, big and strong and tall like superheroes.
 
Castiel feels shy around them, but they don't seem to mind. They ask him some
questions while they drive back to their house, which isn't really a house,
just a motel room.
 
Sam and Dean don't live in one place, they travel all over the country in their
car, and Castiel gets to go with them.
 
Castiel tells them that he's 12, that he can't remember his family, that all he
can remember is the orphanage. They take him to a restaurant for dinner and let
him eat a giant ice cream sundae all by himself.
 
That night Castiel sleeps in a giant bed of his own, so much bigger than the
beds at the orphanage. Sam and Dean share a bed. They explain to him that
sometimes brothers share a bed, that if he ever gets scared he can come sleep
in their bed. Castiel is so tired he falls asleep immediately.
 
They drive for the next couple of days, heading to Lawrence, Kansas so Sam and
Dean can show him where they were born.
 
They get a room in a motel. Dean tells him that they're going to stay there for
a few weeks, that they want to teach him some important things.
 
Castiel hopes he can do good for them. They're always so nice to him and
Castiel knows that he'd just die if they sent him back.
 
The biggest difference in Castiel's new life is how much he gets touched. In
the orphanage, Castiel was always trying to hold hands with the other kids,
hugging and kissing them whenever he could. The nuns had told him it was sinful
and had hit him whenever they caught him, so eventually he just stopped.
 
When he tells Sam and Dean this, Sam gets an angry expression on his face and
hugs Castiel really tight, while Dean hits his hand against the door frame.
 
"Cas," Sam tells him, pulling Castiel onto his lap, "those nuns were wrong.
There's nothing wrong with touching the people you love. Dean and I hug and
kiss all the time, because we love each other." Dean sits down next to them.
"And we love you too, Cas, you're our little brother now. If you ever want to
touch us, you just do it, ok?"
 
Sam and Dean did touch all the time. They hugged each other and kissed and held
hands. Sometimes Cas woke up before them and saw how they slept, wrapped up in
each other's arms.
 
Cas thinks it would be nice to sleep like that.
 
Sam and Dean touch him all the time, too, always hugging him and kissing him
and ruffling through his hair. And they always say such nice things to him,
calling him a good boy and telling him they're proud of him when he learns the
things they're teaching him.
 
Sam shows him how to use the computer and Dean shows him how to cook, always
praising him when he masters something new.
 
Cas starts to touch them, too, seeking out hugs and kissing them and sitting on
their laps when they watch tv.
 
Cas feels like his heart is going to explode every time he does it, like he's
finally home and doesn't have to stop being himself.
*
Castiel wakes up one night when he hears strange noises from Sam and Dean's
bed.
 
They don't sound like bad noises, just … weird. He can hear Dean making those
grunting noises he makes when he's working on the car, when something's being
tricky and he has to work at it. When he isn't grunting he's moaning, sort of
like the sound he makes when he eats a really good slice of pie.
 
And he can hear Sam, too, breathing fast through his nose like he does when he
works out, that long mmmmm sound he makes when he does pull-ups.
 
Cas wonders if he should ask if they're ok, but he doesn't want to make them
angry. The longer he listens to them the more he likes it, until he starts to
feel uncomfortable in his shorts.
 
He knows that something bad is happening to him, that he's doing something
wrong when his bad part feels like that, the nuns had told him that. He'd seen
one of them hit Raph with a ruler when he touched his bad part in the shower.
 
But Cas' bad part feels more and more uncomfortable the longer he listens,
until Cas really, really wants to touch it. But he doesn't, because he knows
that's a sin, and he wants to be a good boy for his new family.
 
So Cas puts a pillow over his head and tries to go back to sleep. Eventually
the noises stop and Cas is able to fall back asleep, even though his bad part
feels sort of achey and painful.
***** Chapter 2 *****
When Cas wakes up, he wants to die.There's a big wet spot in the bed and on his
shorts, what looks like the biggest, stickiest stain on earth. And he knows
it's not pee, it feels different.
 
Cas doesn't remember touching his bad part, but he must have done it in his
sleep. He did that sometimes at the orphanage, and the nuns had beaten him and
told the other boys about Cas' sin.
 
Cas feels the panic rising in his chest. Sam and Dean were going to find out
and they were going to send him back and Cas had ruined everything, Cas was
sinful and bad and they wouldn't want him anymore.
 
Cas looks over at the bed next to him. Sam and Dean are still asleep. Maybe if
Cas can pull off the sheets and hide them with his shorts, they won't know.
 
He's managed to get the top sheet off and roll it into a big ball when he hears
Dean.
 
“Cas, are you OK? What's wrong?”
 
Cas turns to him, opens and closes his mouth a few times, and promptly bursts
into tears.
 
“Sam, wake up,” Dean pokes his brother and gets out of bed, walking over to Cas
carefully.
 
“Why are you taking off your sheets, Cas?” Cas can't stop crying, hysterical at
the thought of being sent back.
 
“Cas, did you have an accident? Look, I used to wet the bed, too, it's nothing
to be ashamed of.” Sam is next to Dean now, both of them looking at him with
concern in their eyes. Cas' face feels hot with shame.
 
“No, I... I didn't wet the bed... I... I... oh please don't send me back I'm
sorry I won't do it again please please don't make me go...” Cas can't say
anything else, just cries and cries as Sam and Dean share a look.
 
Dean comes a little closer to him, arms out in front of him.
 
“Cas, come here. We know what happened.”
 
Cas catches his breath a little and looks up at Dean.
 
“It's ok, Cas, come here.”
 
Dean comes in closes and pulls Cas in for a hug, settling himself down on the
floor before he pulls Cas onto his lap.
 
“You had a wet dream, Cas. It happens all the time to boys your age, didn't
anyone ever tell you that?”
 
Sam smiles at him. “I used to have them all the time, and so did Dean. It's
perfectly normal.”
 
Cas sniffles a little. “It's...” sniff, “it's a sin, the nuns told me, they
used to hit us...”
 
Dean hugs him closer. “Those fucking bitches.”
 
Sam shakes his head. “Oh, Cas, we should have talked to you about this. Look,
Cas, a lot of what those women told you … it was a lie, ok? There's nothing
sinful about having a wet dream. It's fine, and we're never, ever sending you
back there, Cas, not ever, no matter what.”
 
Sam sits down on the floor with his legs crossed.
 
“Cas, do you ever play with yourself?”
 
Cas has stopped crying by now, breath coming back to normal as he sees that Sam
and Dean aren't mad at him.
 
“You mean, like, touch my bad part?”
 
Dean lets out a long breath. “Your bad p.... jesus christ. Cas, I don't ever
want to hear you say that again, ok? There's not a single part of you that's
bad.” Dean kisses the top of his head. “We love all your parts, and you should
too.”
 
Sam smiles sweetly at Dean. “It's called your penis, Cas, although sometimes
boys call it other things, too.”
 
Dean laughs a little, and Cas relaxes as he feels Dean's laugh reverberate
through his chest.
 
“I like to say dick, and Sam likes to say cock.” Cas has heard both of those
words before, but never like this, and it makes him smile because they sound
kind of silly.
 
Cas wipes the tears out of his eyes. “I think I like dick better,” laughing a
little.
 
“That's my boy,” Dean laughs.
 
“Well, whatever you call it,” Sam makes a face at Dean, “it's not a bad part,
and it's totally ok to touch yourself there. Dean and I do it all the time.”
 
“You do?” Cas looks at them both. It can't be bad if Sam and Dean do it.
 
“Yeah, we like it. A lot.” Sam gives Dean a look that Cas doesn't totally
understand, one eyebrow going up.
 
Dean stands up, taking Cas with him and sitting them both down on the bed. “It
feels really good, Cas, you've really never done it?”
 
Cas frowns a little. “Not really, I was always scared. Sometimes I would, um,
sort of rub it over my pants...”
 
Cas blushes a little, it feels funny talking about these things and it's
starting to make his bad part, his dick, he reminds himself, feel sort of funny
again.
 
“That's good, Cas, I bet it felt good, right?” Dean puts his arm over Cas'
shoulder.
 
Cas nods his head. It had felt good, so good he was sure he was being sinful so
he'd tried not to do it.
 
“Did you think about anything while you did it?” Sam asks, and Cas watches him
lick his lips.
 
“Not really, sometimes I would think about, um...” Cas stops, looking down at
the floor, feeling too embarrassed to tell them that sometimes his dick felt
funny when he thought about some of the older boys at the orphanage.
 
“You don't have to tell us if you don't want to, Cas, but you can tell us
anything, ok?”
 
Cas nods, looking over at Sam.
 
“Did you think about pretty girls, Cas?” Sam smiles up at him.
 
“Or maybe other boys?” Dean asks softly, stroking his fingertips along Cas'
shoulder. It makes Cas feel all shivery and definitely makes his dick feel
funnier.
 
“It was, um, it was mostly boys...” Cas says quietly, unsure if he's saying the
right thing.
 
“That's fine, Cas, I think about boys too, and so does Sam.” Dean keeps running
his fingers up and down on Cas' arm. “We both like boys and girls, maybe you
do, too.”
 
Cas looks up at Dean, who's licking his lips a lot, just like Sam.
 
“Do you remember what you were thinking about last night, Cas?” Sam reaches up
and puts his hand on Cas' knee. Cas feels better now that they're both touching
him, safer and less ashamed.
 
“Not really, I just heard...” And Cas stops himself, face going red, because he
doesn't want to tell them that he was listening to them.
 
Sam's eyes go wide. “Did you, um, did you hear us doing anything last night,
Cas?”
 
Sam looks at Dean. “I told you we were being too loud.”
 
Dean turns to look at Cas. “Did we wake you up, Cas?”
 
Cas shakes his head. “No, I mean, yeah, I woke up, but it was ok, I … it
sounded sort of good. What were you doing?”
 
Dean looks down at Sam, who's biting his lip.
 
“We were just … fooling around, Cas, doing brother stuff.” Dean squeezes his
shoulder at the same time Sam squeezes his knee.
 
“We'll talk about that later, ok?” Cas nods, he doesn't know much about being a
brother yet but he's sure they'll teach him everything he needs to know.
 
“It sounded good, huh? Did it make your dick feel good?” Dean's running his
fingers in little circles on Cas' arm while Sam does the same thing on his
knee, and it feels so good Cas wants to touch himself right then.
 
“Yeah,” Cas nods.
 
“I can show you, Cas, show you how to touch yourself so it feels really good.”
Just hearing Sam say that makes Cas' dick sort of twitch, and he gasps a
little.
 
“Would you like that, Cas?” Cas nods his head.
 
“OK,” Sam gets up on his knees, shuffling over until he's in between Cas' legs.
 
“Well, first, you need to get your cock out.” Cas just looks at Sam, mouth
open, suddenly feeling self-conscious. He's never shown his dick to anyone.
 
Dean rubs his hand against the small of Cas' back.
 
“Why don't we all do it, would that make you feel better, Cas? You wanna see
ours?”
 
Cas' dick jumps again at the thought of that, the sort of thing he'd never even
let himself think about when he was secretly rubbing himself over his pants.
 
“Ok, yeah, yes!” Cas doesn't mean to sound so excited, but Sam and Dean don't
seem to mind, both of them breaking out in big grins.
 
“Well, ok, then.” Dean takes his hand off Cas' back and unbuttons his fly while
Sam does the same.
 
Sam takes his dick out first, pushing his sweatpants down his legs and slowly
running his hand up and down on it.
 
“Oh my god!” Cas says before he can stop himself, blushing immediately at what
a moron he sounds like. “It's just … it's so big.”
 
Cas can't stop staring at Sam's dick even when he hears Dean laugh.
 
“Watch out, Cas, it'll go to his head.” Cas tears his eyes away from Sam's dick
and looks over at Dean's, pulled out over the top of his boxers.
 
They're both so different from his, so much bigger and thicker and they both
have hair down there. Their balls looks so different too, bigger and lower and
covered in short, curly hairs.
 
“We wanna see yours, Cas, don't be shy.” Sam looks into his eyes. “We're
brothers, Cas, we don't have anything to be ashamed of.”
 
Of course Sam's right, he doesn't have anything to hide from them, and they've
already shown him their dicks.
 
Cas pushes down his sleeping shorts, still a little stiff in the front from his
wet dream.
 
His cock pops out and slaps against his belly, and Cas thinks it looks so tiny
compared to Sam and Dean's. Sam and Dean don't seem to mind though, both of
them staring at it like it's all they want to see.
 
“That's good, Cas, that's good.” Dean and Sam are both moving their hands up
and down on their dicks, so Cas tries to wrap his hand around his dick the same
way.
 
“Yeah, Cas, just like that.” Sam smiles and nods encouragingly at him. Cas
starts to move his hand a little faster, and they were totally right, it feels
awesome, so much better than the times he rubbed himself through his pants.
 
“Here, Cas, let me show you something.” Sam puts his hand over Cas' hand, makes
him move it a little faster and twist his wrist a little at the top, and it
feels so much better, really, really good.
 
Cas' skin feels tingly all over, like someone dipped him in pop rocks, and he
jumps when Sam puts his other hand on his balls and tugs a little.
 
“Does that feel good, Cas?” Cas tries to say, “Yes,” but it sounds more like,
“Ynnnnhhh,” because it feels so good, so much better than anything he's ever
felt before, better than ice cream and hugging and clean sheets and anything.
 
“You know, Cas, I taught Sammy how to touch himself like this, when he was your
age.” Dean's moving his hand a little faster, and his eyes are sort of half-
open like when he's watching TV really late at night.
 
“Yeah, Cas, Dean used to do this for me all the time until I got good at it,
taught me all sorts of – oh!”
 
It happens so fast Cas doesn't even know what's coming, just jumps like he's
been stung by a bee and spurts out all over Sam's hand, still clasped over his,
hips jerking forward on their own as he grabs at the first thing his hand lands
on, which happens to be Dean's leg.
 
“Holy shit, Cas, that's good, that's so … just, just stay like that, ok, just
stay there...”
 
Cas feels really dazed, like he wants to go to sleep and hug them and eat
something all at the same time, but he can still see that Sam's moving his hand
a lot faster, breathing differently as he strokes himself and looks at his hand
on Cas' dick.
 
Dean's going faster, too, both of them moving so quickly Cas can hear it, and
Cas thinks it sort of sounds like birds flapping their wings, which makes sense
because that's really pretty and nice, just like this, like how he feels right
now.
 
“Oh, fuck...” Cas can feel Sam's hand tightening over his, and he looks down
just in time to see Sam bite really hard on his lip and hold his dick while the
sticky stuff comes out of it, so much more than Cas made, big lines of it that
stick to Sam's sweatpants and run down his hand.
 
Cas had forgotten that his hand was still on Dean's leg, but he remembers when
he feels it start to twitch, Dean letting out one of those grunting noises that
Cas recognizes now, and he makes even more sticky stuff than Sam did, some of
it even lands on Cas' leg before it slides down onto the bed.
 
Both of his brothers just breathe for a while, Dean putting his arm around Cas'
shoulder and pulling him in close to his chest.
 
“Did you like that, Cas?” Dean still sounds like he just went running, and Cas
can feel his chest moving up and down under his head.
 
Cas nods his head against Dean. “That was awesome.”
 
Sam laughs and takes his hand off Cas' dick, holding up both of his hands in
front of Cas and Dean.
“Hey, look, I'm Edward Jizzhands.”
 
Dean laughs, and Cas doesn't get the joke but he still laughs because he's
never heard all the sticky stuff called “jizz” before and he thinks it's funny,
and he still feels sort of fuzzy and like he'd laugh at anything.
 
Sam sits on the bed and moves himself back until he's leaned up against the
wall, Dean following him and pulling Cas back so he's sitting in between them.
 
Cas feels so good, so happy and warm between his new brothers. “I really like
having brothers,” he says without really thinking, and Sam and Dean both laugh
and kiss him on the head.
 
“Yeah, we like it, too, Cas. And there's so much more we're gonna show you.”
***** Chapter 3 *****
They practice jerking off a lot, and Cas gets to practice on them, too. They
teach him lots of other stuff, like how to clean a gun and how to check the oil
in the car, but Cas likes practicing jerking off the best.
 
They practice other stuff, too. One day Cas comes out of the shower, towel
wrapped around him, and sees Sam and Dean kissing each other.
 
They kiss Cas all the time, but not like this, pressed up close to each other
with their tongues. Cas stands and watches them, and he likes it. It makes his
dick feel hard, that's what it's called when your dick feels funny, getting
hard. Cas likes that, it makes him feel like a man to think that he's hard,
just like Sam and Dean.
 
“Hey, Cas.” Dean notices him first. Sam settles his head down on Dean's chest
as Dean leans back against the couch.
 
“What are you guys doing?” Cas asks, already heading toward them. He knows
he'll be welcome with them, there isn't anything they leave him out of any
more.
 
Sam sits up and comes to sit cross-legged across from Dean. They're both in
their boxers and Cas can see that he isn't the only one who's hard.
 
“Come here, Cas, we'll show you.” Dean reaches his hand out for Cas.
 
“We were making out,” Sam explains to him as Cas comes to sit on Dean's lap.
They're always sitting like this, all on top of each other.
 
“It looked like kissing,” Cas says, shifting a little when he feels Dean's dick
under him. Dean had shown him how to sit on their laps when they're hard, so he
doesn't hurt them.
 
“It is kissing, but it's so much better.” Dean rubs his shoulders.
 
“Wanna try?” Sam leans forward and puts his hands on Cas' knees over his towel.
 
“Yeah, ok,” Cas nods, trying to sound cool. He tries not to sound too excited
about new things but it's hard sometimes.
 
Cas knows how to kiss, so he purses his lips and leans towards Sam. Sam
chuckles a little and puts his hand on Cas' cheek.
 
“Not like that, Cas, you have to open your mouth, like this,” Sam shows him,
coming in closer and putting his lips on Cas'.
 
Cas opens his mouth, which feels sort of funny until Sam licks his tongue over
Cas' lips and Cas jumps on Dean's lap.
 
“Oh,” he lets out as Dean laughs and squeezes his shoulders.
 
“Just relax, Cas, Sam is really good at making out.” Sam leans back in and
kisses Cas again, doing the same thing with his tongue except Cas keeps still
this time, watching Sam with wide eyes.
 
“Close your eyes, Cas,” Sam tells him, running his hand through Cas' hair,
which always makes Cas feel goosebumpy and good.
 
Cas closes his eyes and opens his mouth again, and Sam licks inside his mouth,
all over his teeth and his tongue. Cas thinks it would probably sound gross if
someone else told him about it, but it's not gross at all.
 
Sam keeps rubbing his tongue against Cas' tongue, and his hand is moving in
Cas' hair, back and forth really slowly, and it all feels really good. Cas
carefully sticks his tongue out and tries to twist it like Sam's doing.
 
He must have done it right because he can feel Sam sort of moan something into
his mouth that sounds good. Sam presses his hand against the back of Cas' head
and brings them a little closer.
 
Dean's big hands are rubbing his shoulders and when Cas leans into Sam a little
bit more he can feel Dean's dick press against him through his towel. It makes
Cas shiver a little bit when he thinks about seeing it later.
 
Cas can feel so many things, Sam's tongue and Dean's hands and Sam's hand in
his hair and Dean's dick under him and it all feels so good. Cas is really
hard, too, and he really, really wants to start touching himself but he's not
sure if he's supposed to.
 
Cas didn't know he was making noises, but they sound really loud coming out of
his mouth when Sam stops making out with him. Cas really doesn't want him to
stop.
 
“Feels good, right, Cas?” Sam smiles at him. Cas is still leaning forward with
his mouth all open and making those noises. He feels sort of stupid when he
opens his eyes.
 
“You can kiss other things, too,” Dean says behind him. Dean moves his hands
off Cas' shoulders and kisses him on the neck while Sam leans back in and
starts kissing Cas again.
 
Cas will feel stupid later when he thinks about moaning, “Whooooah,” into Sam's
mouth, but kissing on the neck just feels so good he can't remember to keep
acting cool.
 
Sam and Dean seem to like it, though, because Sam kisses him a little harder,
and Dean starts sort of sucking on Cas' neck. That should probably be gross
like the teeth thing, but it's totally not. It feels really, really good.
 
The more they do it the better Cas feels, until he gets sort of fuzzy like he
gets when he comes. He's so hard, but he knows it's ok because Dean is really
hard, too.
 
Cas' skin feels hot and cold and tingly, sort of like getting the flu but not
scary. He knows that these are good feelings now, like your body's telling you
that it likes something. Cas really, really likes making out.
 
Cas feels hotter and colder and more tingly all over the longer they make out,
and he really wants to touch himself but he doesn't want to stop making out to
ask if that's what they do.
 
Sometimes Sam and Dean know what Cas wants even before he does, like when they
give him food before he says he's hungry.
 
Maybe Dean knows that he's getting a little antsy, because he pulls Cas' towel
open and puts his hand on Cas' thigh.
 
“Want me to touch you, Cas?” Dean stops sucking on his neck to ask him. “Want
me to play with your dick while Sam makes out with you?”
 
“Uh-huh,” Cas nods his head so hard and fast that he knocks his teeth against
Sam's. Dean laughs a little, but at least Sam doesn't stop making out with him.
 
“Ok, Cas,” Dean puts his hand on Cas' dick and starts moving it while he sucks
on Cas' neck.
 
Sam and Dean have touched him a lot, helped him jerk off and shown him lots of
ways to make it feel really good, but it was nothing like this.
 
Cas didn't know he could feel this good, like he's not even in his body, just
floating around and feeling everything all at once. He's warm and safe and
good, like nothing bad has ever happened and never will again.
 
Dean starts moving his hand faster and doing that twist thing that makes the
head of his dick feel so sensitive. Sam is kissing him really hard and making
these moaning noises that Cas can feel in his mouth.
 
If Dean is touching Cas' dick, that means it's ok for Cas to touch Sam's dick.
Cas is still hesitant to just touch them there if they don't do it first, but
he's feeling bold with Sam kissing him and Dean touching him and doing that
neck thing.
 
Cas sticks his hands out and gets Sam's dick on his second try. He doesn't want
to open his eyes so he just feels around and pulls Sam's dick out of his
boxers.
 
“Jesus, Cas...” Dean murmurs against his neck as Cas starts to move his hand on
Sam's dick. “That's good, just like that,” Dean encourages him as he keeps one
hand moving up and down while the other one fumbles to try and hold Sam's balls
the way he likes.
 
Sam moans really loud and moves his hand off of Cas' knee. He puts his hand
over Cas' and helps him move it.
 
Sam's kissing him so good, and every time Sam runs his tongue over the roof of
Cas' mouth he gets all shaky. Sam does it a couple more times while Dean starts
moving his hand faster.
 
Then Dean shifts a little and Cas can feel how big and hard Dean's dick is, how
it's pushing right against his legs. Sam's so hard too, and he's making all
these noises while Cas touches him like he really likes it as much as Cas does.
 
Cas' stomach gets all tense and his toes start to curl up, and he knows he's
going to come because he can feels his balls getting tight. Sam had told him
that, how your jizz comes from your balls so you can always tell when it's
coming when your balls feel like that.
 
He doesn't want to stop making out with Sam or touching him, so he doesn't get
a chance to warn Dean. Cas just lets it happen because he knows Dean won't mind
if he blows his load all over his hand. That's what Dean had called it the time
Cas had come so quick it had gotten all over Dean's face. Dean had just laughed
really hard and told him to “warn a guy before you blow your load in his face.”
 
Cas is getting used to coming and it doesn't feel strange any more, but it
still makes him feel dizzy and spaced-out. He can feel his dick jumping and
shooting jizz all over Dean's hand, and he can hear Dean cursing while he
watches because Dean always does that.
 
Sam stops kissing him slowly and keeps his lips pressed against Cas' until Cas
is done coming. Cas is too out of it to move his hand on Sam's dick too much,
but that's ok, because Sam does all the work for him.
 
Sam comes while he makes that groaning exercise noise, but afterwards he says
Cas' name really low and soft, right against Cas' lips.
 
When Sam leans back Cas feels sort of tilty so he just lies back against Dean's
chest. Cas moves back and forth a little bit because he likes the way Dean's
dick feels under him.
 
Dean likes it too. “That's good, Cas, don't stop,” he says, and he hugs Cas
close to him and starts to move with Cas. Sam smiles at them, eyes all slanty
while he licks at his lips.
 
“He always liked that,” Sam says. Dean moves around more and groans a little
while he hugs Cas a little tighter and pushes him down.
 
“Just stay still, ok, Cas? Can you do that for me?” Dean pushes up a little and
Cas can feel his dick even more, and he tries to stay still while it moves back
and forth under his butt.
 
Dean starts doing the neck sucking thing again and holding onto Cas really
tight, making these soft grunting noises that make Cas' heart beat faster and
faster every time Dean rubs against him.
 
Dean says Cas' name when he comes, too, warm wet spot soaking into Cas' towel
and getting his butt sort of sticky. Cas doesn't care. He's hard again and he
feels brave enough to turn his head back and look at Dean.
 
“Dean? Can we make out?”
 
Sam and Dean both laugh. “Of course we can, Cas,” Dean smiles as Cas turns
himself around and plants his open mouth on Dean's.
 
Dean makes out differently than Sam does, not better or worse, just different.
He uses his lips more, and he's slower with his tongue. He touches Cas' face
more and holds his cheeks in his hands.
 
Sam's kissing Cas on the back, which is another place that doesn't sound like a
good place for kissing but totally is. When Cas reaches down to touch himself,
which he figures is ok by now, Sam moves his hand away and does it himself.
 
Cas likes how Sam says, “Shhh,” when he does it, how they're both kissing him
and touching him all over. It makes Cas shake a little bit, like he feels too
good, like he'll fall apart if they stop.
 
Cas comes quickly but it takes him a while to pull himself back together so he
just puts his head on Dean's chest and closes his eyes.
 
They're always patient when he gets overwhelmed like this. Sometimes Cas just
feels so many things all at once that he doesn't feel like talking. The other
boys used to make fun of him and call him strange, but Sam and Dean just hug
him and leave him be until he feels better.
 
And he always does feel better with them, when he's ready. They don't push him.
 
Cas takes a deep breath and sighs against Dean's chest.
 
Dean kisses him on the head. “So what do you think, Cas, you like making out?”
 
Another thing Sam and Dean have taught Cas is how to curse, so he smiles and
says, “Making out is fucking awesome.”
 
Sam kisses his back again. “That's our boy.”
*
 
***** Chapter 4 *****
Cas gets really good at making out. They spend so much time doing it, and there
are so many different ways to get yourself off while you do it.
 
Cas' favorite is when Sam and Dean let him rub his dick against theirs. Sam
says it's called frotterism, and Dean says Sam is a nerd and he can say dry
humping.
 
Sam and Dean tease each other a lot but it's nice teasing, not like how Raph
used to call him spazz and steal his lunch.
 
Cas spends a lot of time practicing dry humping. His dick is getting bigger
now, just like the rest of him, but it's still so much smaller than Sam or
Dean's. Cas likes how big they feel, pressed up against his legs.
 
He likes it when they come on him, when they rub their dicks off on him and
shoot all their jizz onto his stomach. It makes him feel good, that even though
he's not as big as Sam or Dean he can still make them come on him, just like
they do on each other.
 
One time, he'd asked them if he could watch them dry hump each other. He'd sat
at the foot of the bed and jerked off while they did it, and Cas had been so
mesmerized by the sight of their two big dicks rubbing against each other that
he didn't even notice that they were staring at him while they did it.
 
They came all over each other, leaving a big sticky mess on their stomachs. A
lot of things about making out and jerking off seemed like things that would be
gross until you did them, like having jizz on your stomach. But it wasn't
gross, it made Cas come really hard just to see it.
 
After Cas watched them a few more times, Dean asked him what his favorite part
was. Cas had answered quickly, because he never worried about saying the first
thing that popped into his head.
 
“When you jizz all over each other. It's really hot.” Cas had smiled, and Dean
and Sam had just gotten that look in their eyes like they were really turned
on. He loved that look, especially when he was the cause of it.
 
After that they started coming on Cas on purpose, instead of just by accident
like before. Sometimes they came on his dick, and watching that made Cas feel
sort of crazy and dizzy and really hard.
 
He likes the noises they make when they shot all over him, all these grunts and
moans that he recognizes now. He likes knowing when they're going to do it, how
he can see their bodies doing all the little things they do before they come.
 
One day Dean jerked off onto Cas' chest, and right after he shot his load all
over Cas, Sam came right over and licked it off. Cas had watched him with his
eyes really wide, which probably looked dumb but all he could say was, “Wow,”
looking up at Dean who just smiled really big at him.
 
Cas barely had to touch his dick to come, and he'd started shaking when Sam had
sucked on one of his nipples.
 
Sometimes new things felt so good that Cas couldn't speak, so he just sort of
went, “Hhnngh.” But Sam and Dean knew when he liked something, so Dean had just
touched Cas gently, with those soft strokes down his sides that made him feel
really good, while Sam sucked on his nipples until Cas got hard again.
 
Dean had jerked him off while he and Sam shared one of those looks. Cas
recognized them now as the look they made when they thought Cas was ready to
try something new. He came really hard when he thought about that because new
things are pretty much always awesome.
*
The next day Dean comes back from running errands while Cas and Sam are working
on the computer. Cas is really good with the computer and Sam is showing him
all sorts of things that he can do with it. Cas likes the maps the best.
 
They make Cas feel so smart and like he's useful. Dean always tells him what a
good cook he is, so tonight Cas makes them dinner: grilled cheese sandwiches
and tomato soup. The secret is making Dean's grilled cheese with lots of butter
in a frying pan, and making Sam's dry in the toaster.
 
After dinner they sit on the couch, which makes Cas really excited because that
means they're probably going to make out.
 
“Hey Cas, we were thinking maybe we could watch a movie tonight.” Cas smiles,
he likes watching movies, especially the old cowboy movies that Dean likes.
“Ok.”
 
Sam gets up and comes back with the computer. Cas is confused for a second and
looks at Dean, who smiles at him. “It's a special movie, we have to watch it on
the computer.” Cas shrugs. It's not like he's worried, any movie Dean likes is
probably good.
 
Sam opens a folder on the computer that Cas recognizes because he'd tried to
open it himself. It had a password and Cas watches as Sam types 'impala' into
the keyboard.
 
Sam scrolls through the file lists too fast for Cas to really read them, but he
catches words like face and cum and fuck. This is going to be a really good
movie.
 
Cas turns his head as he feels Dean move next to him as Dean takes his jeans
off. He throws them across the room and puts his arm around Cas' shoulder.
“This was Sam's favorite movie when he was your age,” Dean tells him as Sam
settles down on the couch next to Cas.
 
Cas doesn't think it looks that great to start with. A man with a pizza rings a
doorbell and a pretty girl with a blonde ponytail answers it. Cas sort of
spaces out for a while, thinking about later when he wants to dry hump Dean
while Dean makes out with Sam.
 
“Mister, I don't have any money,” says the blonde girl. She's wearing a really
short skirt and she twirls her ponytail a lot. Sam nudges him. “This is the
good part, Cas.”
 
“Well I can think of another way you can pay me, baby,” says the man holding
the pizza. He puts the box on the table and undoes his belt and then Cas claps
his hand over his mouth and looks back and forth between his big brothers
because No. Way.
 
“Wha-aaaaat?!” Cas can't believe what he's seeing. The pizza man takes his dick
out, just like that. And his dick is big, really big, like, bigger than Sam and
Dean's dicks big. “No way.”
 
Cas' eyes are wide as he looks at Sam, who's smiling and chuckling at Cas'
reaction. Dean ruffles his hair and pulls Cas a little closer to him. “Watch,”
Dean whispers, nodding at the screen.
 
The pizza man starts jerking off a little, while the blonde with the ponytail
gets on her knees. Cas is starting to get hard watching the guy play with his
dick, and he notices that Dean is getting hard too. He's running his thumb up
and down over Cas' shoulder in that way that always makes Cas shiver really
good.
 
The blonde is wearing lots of pink lipstick so Cas' eyes keep going to her
mouth. He likes colorful things. The pizza guy still has his dick in his hand
and Cas wonders if he's going to jerk off in her face, which is something Cas
has thought about. He hasn't said anything to Sam or Dean about it because he's
not sure if you're supposed to do it and sometimes Cas thinks about crazy
things. He knows he can tell them anything but sometimes the things he thinks
about still sort of embarrass him.
 
Cas watches with his mouth hanging open in shock as the blonde leans forward
and opens her mouth. Cas doesn't know what's happening but he feels his cheeks
getting hot and his dick getting wet as a little bit of the clear stuff, which
Sam had told him is called pre-come which makes sense because it leaks out
before you come, oozes out. The pizza guy puts his hand around the blonde's
bouncy ponytail and then he, seriously, for real, swear to god, puts his dick
in her mouth.
 
Cas yells out “Oh my god!” before he even realizes it and he can hear Sam and
Dean laughing really hard but he can't stop watching. The blonde girl opens her
mouth so wide Cas can't believe it, and just keeps going until all of the pizza
guy's really big dick is all the way inside her mouth.
 
Cas doesn't take his eyes off the screen as he pulls his sweatpants down so he
can start playing with himself. He's sure it's ok, and he knows he's right as
Dean tugs on his ear, which is what he does when he's proud of Cas. “Atta boy,”
Dean says, pulling his arm back from its place around Cas' shoulder.
 
Dean shimmies out of his boxers and tosses them aside, and then he's naked next
to Cas. Cas can see Sam slipping his cock out, Sam always says cock, through
the flap in his boxers, too. Cas really, really wants to make out with them but
he also really, really doesn't want to stop watching the girl with the dick in
her mouth. She's moving now, going up and down on it and Cas feels like he's
staring at stars lying on the hood of the car, warm all over and totally
dazzled by how pretty it all is.
 
“Looks good, huh, Cas?” Sam asks him, and Cas tears his eyes away to nod his
head at Sam, huge smile on his face because it doesn't just look good, and Cas
says so. “It looks fucking awesome,” and Sam smiles, licking his lips as he
strokes his cock. Cas looks back at the movie and starts to stroke his own dick
a little faster.
 
“Hey, Cas, wanna do something for me?” Dean runs his hand up and down Cas'
back. Cas is having a hard time not staring at the girl as she moves her mouth
faster on the pizza guy's dick, but he manages to turn to Dean. “Yeah, sure,
Dean,” he nods, eyes going back and forth between the movie and Dean, who's
looking at him with that look that makes Cas feel like he's really special.
 
“C'mere,” and Dean puts his hands on Cas' waist, and feeling Dean's hand on him
and watching the movie and hearing Sam sigh and play with himself is just a
lot, like a lot of really good feelings all at once. Cas thinks he could come
but he doesn't want to, not yet.
 
That's another thing Sam and Dean have taught him, that sometimes it's better
if you hold off for a little bit, because then it feels even better when you
actually come for real.
 
Cas decides that this is one of those times, so he bites his lip a little and
takes a deep breath. He tries to concentrate as he wriggles over onto Dean's
lap, big hands helping to pull him up. Cas shifts his hips so he can press
Dean's dick behind his back which is how they usually do it when Cas sits like
this but Dean stops him.
 
“Wanna try something different tonight, Cas,” so Cas lets Dean lift him up a
little and settle him down until Dean's dick is right between Cas' legs instead
of back against his butt like usual. Dean moves him around until Dean's dick is
snug against Cas' balls, peeking up in between his legs. Dean's pubes, that's
what the hair around your dick and your balls is called, Sam said Cas will have
some soon, tickle against Cas' thighs as Dean moves around. Dean's dick is so
big and Cas' legs are so skinny that a few inches of Dean's dick still stick
out.
 
Dean puts his hands on Cas' thighs and runs them back and forth a few times
before he pushes Cas' legs together. It feels really good, and Dean's big dick
pressing against his balls makes him feel all itchy under his skin like when he
tries not to come too soon. He's trying really, really hard, isn't even
touching his dick.
 
Cas looks at the movie and sees the girl bobbing her head up and down faster,
and she has a little bit of spit on her chin that Cas keeps looking at. He
really likes that.
 
Sam slides over closer and leans in towards Cas. “That's called a blowjob,
Cas.” Dean's head is over his shoulder as all three of them watch while the
pizza guy pulls her ponytail and takes his dick all the way out of her mouth.
There's a shiny trail of spit running between her mouth and his dick, and Cas
is so mesmerized by it that he almost jumps when Dean starts to move under him.
 
“Just keep your legs like that, ok, Cas?” Dean rocks his hips up and starts
moving his dick up and down in between Cas' legs. It catches on Cas' balls each
time and Cas really, really likes it. Cas reaches down to start playing with
himself but he feels Dean's hand move him away. Dean takes his hand and leads
it to his own dick, sticking up in between Cas' legs and shiny with precome.
 
“Don't worry, Cas, Sammy'll take care of you,” and Cas relaxes, expecting Sam's
big hand to close over his dick. Dean moves Cas' hand around over the head of
his dick, rubbing his thumb over the little stretch of skin on the bottom that
Sam had told him was called a frenulum. Dean said Sam was a dork and told him
that it felt good when you ran your thumb across it while you jerked off.
 
Cas is watching as the blonde girl licks her tongue around that little spot,
and then everything goes all sideways as Cas feels the best thing ever in the
history of his dick. “Oh fuuuuuuck,” Cas moans out, looking down as Sam does
exactly what the girl in the video is doing, sliding Cas' whole dick into his
mouth.
 
Sam sounds like he's drinking a Big Gulp really loud like when he wants to
annoy Dean in the car. Cas can feel his tongue moving around on his dick and it
feels so good it almost hurts. Cas forgets about his hand on Dean's dick
because he's not even really sure where he is any more. Dean puts his hand over
Cas' and moves it, other arm wrapped around Cas' waist to move him up and down.
 
Sam's mouth is the most amazing thing ever and it's better than jerking off or
dry humping or anything Cas has ever felt before. It's warm and it's wet and
it's Sam doing it, Sam who's so big and strong and smart and kind and gentle
with him. All of his feelings for Sam just wash over him as Dean puts his mouth
right on that spot behind Cas' ear and sucks on it.
 
Cas can feel his balls drawing up as Sam sucks on his dick and Dean sucks on
his ear and grinds his big dick against Cas' legs. Then Dean sweeps his hand
across Cas' chest and gently runs his finger over Cas' nipple and it's more
than Cas can stand. He goes stiff and starts to whine out, which would
embarrass him if he could remember that he'd been practicing making grunting
noises when he came in the bathroom so he could sound more like Sam and Dean.
 
But all he can remember is how perfectly happy and good and loved he feels,
heart going so big in him he could almost explode. All of his brothers'
attention just pours down on him and takes everything else away as his toes
curl up and his chest gets tight and he comes, sharp jerks of his hips into
Sam's mouth.
 
And Sam doesn't take his mouth off, he just holds it there while Cas comes and
Dean kisses his neck and tells him how good he is. Cas closes his eyes and
leans back, breathing heavy until his vision clears up and he can think
straight enough to wonder where his jizz went.
 
Sam leans up until he's right next to Dean, face all bright red. He makes a
loud swallow sound and smiles at them. “And that's called swallowing,” and Cas
feels his mouth drop open again as Dean leans in to kiss Sam. Cas can see their
tongues swirling around together as Dean digs his fingers into Cas' hips and
pushes him down, rubbing himself off against Cas' legs a little faster. Sam is
jerking himself off while they kiss. The rhythmic noise of it makes Cas feel
sleepy.
 
Dean pulls him down hard and shouts out, “Oh fuck, fuck,” and comes all over
Cas, white splatter against his chest before the last of it lands on his balls
and his dick, which starts to get hard again just at the sight of that. Sam
follows him closely, grunting out the kind of sounds that Cas really hopes
he'll make one day as he comes across Cas' legs.
 
Sam slumps down next to Dean, head resting against Dean's side as Dean puts his
arm around him. Cas leans back and smiles up at Dean. “So, Cas, you like
blowjobs?” Cas nods his head and tries to sound manly when he says, “Fuck,
yeah,” like Dean does. Dean laughs into his hair.
 
Cas stretches himself and turns around until he's straddling Dean. He knows
Dean won't mind getting jizz all over himself, so Cas leans close to him and
opens his mouth for a kiss. Dean makes out with him for a while until Cas turns
his head and does the same to Sam, taking turns with his brothers until he
feels warm and soft inside.
 
“Wanna do it to you,” Cas whispers into Sam's mouth, kissing his lips before he
turns back to Dean. “Can I?” Cas can feel himself getting tired but he really,
really wants to know what it feels like.
 
“How about another time, ok, Cas?” Sam strokes his hair and kisses his neck.
“We have something else for you.” Sam smiles and raises his eyebrows at Dean,
who nods his head and hugs Cas close. “Gotta close your eyes, Cas.” Cas
squeezes his eyes shut while he hears Sam in the tiny kitchen of their motel
room. Sam and Dean always give him good surprises so he doesn't mind waiting.
 
“Ok, open your eyes.” Cas opens his eyes and turns to see Sam holding a pint of
ice cream with a candle in it, why would there be a candle in ice cream, it's
almost like...
 
“It's your birthday, Cas!” Dean points at the clock on top of the TV that read
12:00. “You're 13!” Sam holds the ice cream in front of Cas so he can blow the
candle out.
 
“Congratulations, Cas, today you're a man. Mazel tov, ” Dean says proudly. Cas
doesn't know what that means but he still likes it.
 
Cas tries to say thank you and oh my god and a lot of things but instead he
just opens his mouth and closes it as he feels tears spring into his eyes.
 
“Oh, Cas, don't cry, what's wrong?” Sam sets the ice cream down and sits down
next to Dean, who's running his hands over Cas' back and shushing him.
 
“I'm not,” Cas sniffs, “... there's nothing wrong, I've just ...” He brings up
a hand to rub at his eyes. “I've never had a birthday before.” He laughs a
little at how crazy he must seem, crying when he's so, so happy, but Sam smiles
and wipes a tear off his cheek.
 
“We're gonna be here for every other birthday you ever have, Cas, promise,”
Dean says, kissing his forehead. “Now have some ice cream before I eat it all.”
 
It's not quite as good as blow jobs, but this ice cream with the chunks of
cookie dough in it might be really close. “So what do I get to do now that I'm
13?” Cas asks, cookie dough chewy in his mouth.
 
Sam and Dean look at each other and Cas knows that look. “Well, there's a lot
of stuff, Cas, but we'll talk about that later.” Sam looks at Dean again before
he steals a scoop of ice cream and smiles at Cas.
 
So there is stuff they aren't telling him about. Cas just nods and smiles,
eating another spoonful of ice cream. He knows they'll tell him when they're
ready.
 
Besides, Cas has gotten really good at using the computer.
 
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