Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/1588829.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Walking_Dead_(TV), Walking_Dead
  Relationship:
      Rick_Grimes/Carl_Grimes
  Character:
      Rick_Grimes, Carl_Grimes, Lori_Grimes
  Additional Tags:
      Alternate_Universe, Pre-Apocalypse, No_Apocalypse, Parent/Child_Incest,
      Underage_Sex, Carl_is_13_this_time_because_I'm_a_bad_person, Anal_Sex,
      Wet_Dream, Cheating, Awkward_Sexual_Situations, Awkwardness, Awkward
      Romance, Awkward_Conversations
  Stats:
      Published: 2014-05-09 Words: 4359
****** How Did We End Up Here? ******
by RickGrimes
Summary
     Prompt: Pre-apoc AU w/ Rick and Carl sneaking around behind Lori’s
     back.
Carl and Rick had always been close and they took comfort in their strong
relationship. There had never been anything malefic about it. Carl sometimes
had bad dreams and he’d wander to his parents’ room, crawling into the bed
between his mom and dad. Lori would comfort him, and Rick would just wrap his
arms around him silently. Carl felt light and safe in his dad’s arms. If he was
being honest with himself, he’d sought out the comfort of Rick even if it
wasn’t exactly needed.
Rick had caught on when Carl would lay beside him, evidently not scared or
bothered. He’d just turn on his side and look at him, ponderingly. He liked
that Carl wanted his company even when he didn’t really need it. It meant that
Carl just wanted to sleep beside him. Rick could accept that.
“What’s the matter, Carl?” Rick would whisper.
Sometimes Carl would lie and tell him something scared him, and sometimes he
would shrug, “Just didn’t want to sleep alone.”
Nothing about advancing their relationship even crossed their minds. It was
just understood that they were each other’s favourite. Carl adored being
brought to school and picked up by his dad. He would sit by his dad on the
couch no matter what he was watching on TV. The boy helped Rick with yard work
or paperwork—if he could. He loved it when Rick would tell him about his day at
the station. Carl even wanted to be a police officer when he grew up.
Rick could tell that Lori saw their closeness and was a bit jealous, but Carl
still loved her too, it was just incomparable to the admiration he had for his
father. He practically worshiped him.
The first time Carl had come to Rick he was 13.
Rick’s eyes flashed open when he felt a light nudge on his shoulder. It was
Carl. The boy’s body language conveyed that he wasn’t there to share the bed,
but that he wanted Rick to follow him. The man got up quietly and let Carl lead
him to his room. Carl flicked on the light and closed the door. Rick squinted
his eyes tiredly, “What’s wrong?” Rick asked.
“I’m not sure,” Carl admitted.
Rick had a slight idea of where this was going, but he let Carl explain himself
anyways.
“I just,” he hesitated, “I was having a dream and then I woke up… and I felt
weird. So I checked and I was wet and sticky. I didn’t really know what to do,”
Carl fidgeted while he sat on the edge of his bed, not looking Rick in the eye.
He didn’t know what was happening, but he felt like he should be embarrassed,
“Are you mad?”
“I’m not mad, Carl,” Rick assured. He was not interested at all in giving Carl
an explanation for what had just happened to him, but he supposed it was his
responsibility. As much as Carl thought he had all the answers for everything,
Rick was kind of awkward and didn’t know what to say.
“It’s called a ‘wet dream’,” Rick said, going to the dresser to get Carl some
clean underwear. He chose a pair and then walked over to Carl, examining his
sheets to see if he’d have to change them. They were good. He took a couple of
tissues from the boy’s nightstand and handed those over along with the
underwear.
He looked away when Carl stripped and cleaned himself off.
“What is it?” Carl said after he’d changed.
“It happens once you start developing,” Rick explained, sitting next to Carl on
the bed, “When you sleep, sometimes your body gets a mind of its own. You
ejaculate, which is what that sticky stuff was,” Rick said, cringing afterward.
He wanted to be helpful, but he was mortified. Of course, Carl was hanging on
to every word as if it didn’t even bother him.
“So this is semen?” Carl asked uncertainly.
“Yeah,” Rick answered.
“I was wondering when this was going to happen to me. I should’ve known what it
was.”
“That’s okay, glad you know at least a little, so I don’t have to explain
everything,” Rick chuckled, getting up and slapping a hand on Carl’s knee, “So
you’re good here?” He wanted to escape the situation.
“I think so, thanks, Dad,” Carl said.
Rick walked to the light switch and flicked it off, about to leave when Carl
asked, “Dad?”
“Hmm?”
“Sometimes it happens because of a dream, right?” The voice sounded from the
dim light of Carl’s room.
“That’s right,” Rick said.
“What does it mean that I was dreaming of you?”
Rick’s face burned, “W-what?”
“Is that bad?” Carl asked, shifting to sit up in his bed.
“What was I doing in the dream?” Rick asked hesitantly.
Carl was silent, “I don’t remember. You were just there. I don’t know."
Rick ran his hand through his hair, sighing, “Goodnight, Carl.”
The boy’s answer was a whispered “’night”. He could tell he’d done something
wrong. His dad was too nice to say anything, but Carl could feel his
disappointment.
The next time it happened to Carl he didn’t say anything. He just took care of
it himself. He didn’t really know what it meant that Rick’s presence in the
dreams was recurring. A lot of the time he forgot what actually happened, but
he was always aware of Rick’s touch on his skin. The dreams made him long to
actually know what it felt like. The only touches he got from Rick were hugs,
or quick pats. It seemed as he got older the man had less affection. He didn’t
like it. Of course, Rick had his own reasons for that whether subconsciously or
consciously.
 
Carl’s bad dreams didn’t stop as he got older, they just changed. He kept
dreaming that he and Rick got into fights or that his dad left. Of course, the
other dreams he had about his dad didn’t stop either. He wasn’t getting used to
it, even though it’d been almost a year since the first one. He did notice that
they were getting more explicit and he was starting to remember more of them.
After a particularly bad dream where Rick had told him he didn’t care about
him, he didn’t hesitate to go to the man. He didn’t care if he was 13 or “too
old to sleep in his parents’ bed”. He slid next to Rick so he was on the edge
of the bed and not in the middle. Rick didn’t even wake up, but he
subconsciously moved so Carl could rest against him with the man’s arm wrapped
around him. Carl didn’t think anything of it when he pressed his body as close
as he could to Rick. It was then that his body decided to betray him.
Rick woke up and could feel Carl wrapped around him tightly, legs entwined with
his. Carl was still asleep, but he was moving his hips slowly against the man,
moaning quietly. Rick didn’t know what to do so he just held onto the boy,
looking sideways to Lori to ensure she hadn’t woken up. She was used to Carl
coming into their room by now so she just slept through it—lucky for Rick who
had his son at his side in a compromising position. Carl came within seconds,
waking up from it.
Carl opened his eyes, confused and he realized what he’d done. Rick was just
looking at him, but he didn’t look disgusted. He could feel the wetness in his
boxers and he knew Rick was aware of it too.
“I’m sorry.”
“You don’t need to be,” Rick answered, “What did you think about this time?” He
asked, unable to contain the question that was burning in his mind the entire
time.
“You again,” Carl sighed, “I don’t know why.”
Rick nodded, acceptingly. He was pleased. He kissed the boy on the cheek and
settled back into bed. Carl could clean up in the morning.
The man disentangled himself from Carl a few hours later when he had to get
ready for work. Carl easily occupied the space Rick had left behind, rolling
over and spreading out. Rick smiled and headed to the bathroom. He stripped and
got into the shower, noticing the marks on his boxers from Carl. He groaned in
exasperation. That boy was something else.
He didn’t notice Carl coming into the bathroom until he was already in the
shower and the boy slid the curtain aside, stepping in.
“Carl, we can’t do this,” Rick said, looking at the boy’s body and then away.
“Why not?”
“We just can’t, it’s not right. We’re not allowed.”
“So. Nobody has to know,” the boy said, moving under the water alongside his
dad.
Rick shook his head, “I can’t.”
Carl frowned, “Stop saying that. You’re just scared.”
“What makes you the expert?” Rick asked, reaching for the soap.
“I know you want to, or else last night wouldn’t have happened.”
“Last night was a onetime thing,” Rick said.
“We’ll see. You haven’t kicked me out of the shower yet.”
“What happened to the shy little boy who came to my room because of bad
dreams?” Rick sighed.
“I realized what I wanted after a year of wanting it,” Carl answered.
“I haven’t had as much time,” Rick replied, when a knock sounded at the
bathroom door.
“Rick?” Lori called?
“Yeah?” Rick answered, looking at Carl with a panicked expression.
“Carl in there with you?”
Carl smirked, challenging his dad to answer.
“Yes,” Rick told her shaking his head at the boy’s cocky expression. If they
got caught like this it wouldn’t look so good.
“You locked the door, right?” Rick said to Carl.
Carl rolled his eyes, “Obviously.”
"What are you two up to?" She asked playfully.
"He's brushing his teeth," Rick called back, willing her to let it go
He exhaled in relief when Lori didn’t say anything else.
“Carl get outta here,” Rick said, “I’m serious.”
“Just tell me the truth. Are you saying no because you don’t want me?”
Rick knew if he admitted that he wanted Carl the boy would persist until he got
his way. Maybe he wanted him to. It had taken last night and his compliance to
finally and fully open his eyes to his feelings. He liked the way Carl needed
him. The way he clung to him even in his sleep. Rick needed him too. His son
was the best part of his life and he wanted to hold onto that. It hadn’t been
intentional to feel that way for Carl, but he yearned for him regardless of his
intentions.
Rick turned the water off, and stepped out of the shower. Carl followed.
“What do you want me to say? Yes, I want you, but it doesn’t change anything,”
Rick admitted.
“It could.”
“You want to sneak around behind your mother’s back? Even if that wasn’t wrong,
it’s against the law.”
“Who cares about that? What’s between us is our business.”
“You’re 13, Carl. You didn’t even know what a wet dream was and now what? You
want me to screw you to live some teenage fantasy? I’m not gonna do that. It’ll
end badly for both of us.”
“You don’t know anything,” Carl argued. He was hurt that his dad thought he was
doing all of this because he was a mindless, horny kid.
“What don’t I know? You’re taking these dreams and makin’ ‘em real. There’s a
difference between fantasy and reality.”
“I’m not stupid. I know how I feel.”
“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do,” Rick admitted, “I’m not taking
advantage of you,” he continued, putting his hand on Carl’s cheek.
“You’re not. I obviously want this more than you do.”
“I doubt that,” Rick said, pulling away, “What’s wrong with me?”
“Same thing that’s wrong with me, I guess.”
Rick looked at Carl, still naked, standing before him with his arms at his
sides.
“I gotta go to work. We can talk about this later,” Rick said.
“No, there’s nothing to talk about,” Carl argued, “It’s yes or no. Are we doing
this or not?”
“I’ll pick you up after school. We’ll talk then,” Rick said, leaving the
bathroom.
Carl wasn’t happy, but at least his dad was going to think about it. He didn’t
understand what was so difficult for Rick. He knew that his father was holding
back, and there wasn’t anything he could do about it. He knew it wasn’t exactly
morally sound or legal, but he didn’t care about that. As long as they kept it
a secret it wasn’t hurting anyone. The only person it would hurt was him. Being
rejected by his dad would be unbearable. He didn’t think their relationship
could be the same now that everything was out in the open. They could only go
forward or everything else—their bonding—from over the years would be lost.
 
Carl was nervous all day. He went through school distracted and anxious. He
didn’t know what his father was going to decide. He waited outside after the
bell rang, looking around the parking lot for his dad’s car. Rick finally
pulled up and Carl walked up to the vehicle.
“Hey,” Carl greeted.
“Hi,” Rick answered.
“So? Did you decide?
Rick chuckled, “Decide if we’re gonna screw around?”
“No. We’re not screwing around. It’d be more than that,” Carl argued.
“You don’t just want this because you think it’d be fun?”
“If I wanted fun this is the last place I’d look,” Carl answered, “You think
it’s fun wanting someone you can’t have? You think I don’t feel bad about Mom,
and how it could get you in trouble?”
“Then why?” Rick asked.
“Because you’re just… I don’t know, you. I think it’s worth the trouble,” Carl
explained.
“I think you are,” Rick replied. They both knew it was trouble. Carl’s words
had assured him though, and confirmed his decision. He had known since the
morning that his answer was yes. Even when he was convinced that Carl was just
after him because it was forbidden, and just something to occupy his time, the
answer was yes. But with Carl’s encouragement and extra explanation of why he
wanted this—love and not lust—Rick’s mind was made up even further. Carl wanted
this. He wanted this. There was nothing else to consider at this point.
Carl smiled, “So we’re doing this?”
“I think so,” Rick replied, “I know it’s not exactly… well, orthodox, but I
think it can work. I’m willin’ to try.”
“Me too,” Carl nodded.
Rick felt contented with all of the preliminary talking out of the way. Now it
was just down to him and his boy. They’d both decided they were doing this now.
All that was left was to actually do it.
After that it was easy. Rick and Carl understood what was going to happen
between them. It was just a matter of finding the perfect time to initiate
things. No matter how prepared they were to get started, they still had to be
careful. Lori and the law were both concerns even if they weren’t enough to
prevent them from being together. Rick didn’t think anything could prevent it.
 
When Rick pulled into the driveway he was actually uneasy. Was anything going
to happen so soon? When he’d been discussing the relationship with Carl it had
been difficult enough, but actually doing it was going to be almost impossible.
He didn’t know how to proceed. This was his son. His boy. How was he supposed
to do this? Take Carl on his childhood bed? On the bed he shared with his wife?
As he thought about it, anticipation instead of repulsion overcame him. What
he’d accused Carl of was actually a huge part of why he wanted this so much.
The forbidden. Fucking his 13 year old son? The boy he’d raised and loved. It
was unthinkable and that made it so much more desirable. The corruption and sin
was just as enticing as Carl was. How was Rick supposed to help himself?
Carl had the largest smirk anyone could wear before it turned into smile. He
looked at his dad shyly before exiting the car, “Mom’s not here.”
“Yeah, she went to see your grandparents,” Rick explained.
Carl walked into the house, throwing his backpack to the ground, “So where are
we going to do this?”
“This?” Rick repeated.
“Sex,” Carl with an expression that told Rick he might be an idiot.
“What? Now?”
“It’s perfect. Mom’s gone. When else would we get the chance?”
Rick could see Carl’s point. He was a bit taken off guard that Carl was ready
to move so fast while he was putting on the brakes. It made him feel better
about the whole thing since he wasn’t manipulating or taking advantage of the
boy.
“True,” Rick agreed. The man took off his holster and hung it up, moving his
hands to rest at his hips in his usual pose. He started unbuttoning his shirt,
holding Carl’s gaze.
Rick could tell that Carl was having trouble getting things going, “Okay
there?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
Carl shrugged, “Not really, no. I don’t really know how to start,” he sighed.
He had thought this would be easy. Rick agreed and then it would be smooth
sailing from there, but it was a lot more awkward than he’d anticipated.
The man took off his shirt, “Take off yours now,” he instructed.
Carl slipped off his t-shirt, looking at Rick for further guidance.
“Pants,” he said, taking his own off.
Upon seeing his father standing there in just boxers, Carl got over his
hesitation and shyness. Everything he’d been wanting for the past year came to
the forefront of his mind and he knew at once that he was ready. He walked
forward to his dad, standing before him waiting for him to make another move.
Rick looked Carl up and down and then picked him up. Carl immediately responded
by wrapping his legs around his dad’s waist.
“Where?” Rick asked, allowing the boy to choose.
“My room. It’s where this all started,” Carl said, rolling his eyes internally
at the corniness, even though it was true.
Rick carried the boy up the stairs, leaving the discarded clothes behind by the
door. Carl clung to him like he always had while Rick brought him to his own
bed. The man placed him on the mattress, hovering over his body. Rick kissed
Carl. Carl’s first. The boy was extremely eager and opened his mouth
immediately for Rick’s tongue. The man’s hands were all over Carl’s body,
feeling every contour of him. The same body he’d protected from nightmares and
the dark. Now it was his. Carl was prepared to let his father do whatever he
wanted. Rick ran his finger under the waistband of Carl’s underwear, slipping
them off.
Carl dug his hands into Rick’s back, trying to pull him closer. The man brought
his roaming hands down to Carl’s ass, pressing the tip of his finger against
the boy’s hole.
“There’s lube under my pillow,” Carl said, lifting his hips off the bed so his
father could reach his ass more easily.
“Where’d you get it?” Rick asked, reaching under Carl’s pillow to grab the
bottle.
“Stole it from your room,” the boy admitted, smiling as Rick nuzzled into his
neck, biting and sucking at the sensitive skin. Carl hoped it left a mark. He
wanted to see proof that his dad had been with him. He wanted to feel it.
Rick smiled, opening the new bottle and spreading some on his fingers. He
brought his finger back down to Carl’s entrance, pressing against it once more,
and this time pushing in.
Carl bit his lip, and lifted his hips off the bed. He couldn’t believe this was
actually happening. He never thought this was something he’d be able to have.
Rick licked at Carl’s lips, catching his bottom lip between his teeth and
tugging gently.
“Another,” Carl urged, pressing his ass against Rick’s finger.
The man obliged, adding another one to Carl’s hole. He circled them around the
rim and dragged his fingers against Carl’s inner walls. Carl was shaking by the
time Rick found his prostate. He moved his fingers slowly over and over again
across the sensitive spot within the boy. Carl writhed beneath him, begging him
not to stop.
“Please, Dad,” he moaned, his nails digging into Rick’s back almost painfully.
Rick pulled his fingers out and thrust them back in hard, hitting Carl’s
prostate directly, wringing the orgasm out of him. He spilled between their
bodies, the only noise his loud exhale when the tension in his body finally let
go.
“Good boy,” Rick encouraged, running his tongue over Carl’s skin. He wouldn’t
even need to bother with his fingers now; Carl was already opened and relaxed
for him after his release.
Rick pulled his boxers off, gripping his erection. He grabbed the lube that
he’d put beside him in easy reach and slicked it over his cock. He lined it up
with Carl’s ass.
Carl spread his legs, “Do it.”
The man met Carl’s eyes, his own burning into the boy’s. Carl gave him a small
nod.
Rick pushed forward, everything around him dulling in comparison to the feel of
Carl’s tightness around his dick. He watched as Carl’s hole stretched to accept
his cockhead and then tightened around the shaft as Rick pushed in further.
“Uhnn,” was all Carl could articulate as his father filled him up.
“Good?” Rick asked.
“Keep going.”
Rick went deeper, his hands entangled with Carl’s on either side of the boy’s
head. Carl looked up at his father in amazement and adoration. Rick pulled back
and thrust forward slowly, easing the boy into it before he picked up his pace.
The man snapped his hips forward, pushing himself into Carl again and again,
the boy’s ass clenching around him. Carl rocked his hips to meet his dad’s
thrusts, his legs wrapped around the man, trying to pull him deeper and closer.
Rick pulled out suddenly, flipping Carl onto his stomach and snaking an arm
under his body to pull him up and back on his knees. He pushed back into Carl
easily, the boy moving forward from the force.
Carl kept moving himself back when Rick moved forward, intensifying the angle.
Their skin slapped together debauchedly, accentuating each move they made. Rick
rested his hands on Carl’s hips, pulling him back even as the boy did so
himself. He wondered if it was too hard and fast for Carl’s first time, but if
Carl’s moans were any indication, the boy didn’t mind.
“Carl,” Rick groaned, fucking into the boy even faster and then halting all
together as he came. Carl grabbed his dick and brought himself off quickly with
his father still inside him, coming for the second time that night. He could
feel the wet heat of his dad’s come inside him, marking him. He shuddered
excitedly when he thought of belonging to his dad when no one else knew.
Sitting at the dinner table with his parents, knowing Rick had just fucked him,
or going to school with his father’s taste on his mouth.
He fell forward onto his stomach, Rick pulling out and lying next to him.
Rick sighed, knowing they couldn’t just stay here and enjoy it. Lori could be
home any minute.
“You still sure about this?” Rick couldn’t help but ask.
“Even more than I was before,” Carl smiled.
“Me too,” Rick replied, “We gotta get up though. Your mom could be home soon.”
Carl frowned. His dad was right. He nodded and got up reluctantly.
 
They were lucky they got up when they did since it was only a few minutes later
that Lori walked in the door, calling for them. She’d brought supper back with
her after the visit she’d made.
“Hope you guys are hungry,” she smiled, kissing them both on the cheek. Rick
felt terribly guilty that Carl had to see that, but he tried to act normal.
Carl winced, but he knew it was going to be something he had to live with. His
mood was saved when he realized he was going to get what he wanted. He was
going to sit there, ass sore and claimed, and eat dinner with both of his
parents. His mom none the wiser about what had just happened. It turned him on
immensely, and he smiled from under his lashes at Rick who wore the same smile
of satisfaction.
Everything was going fine until Lori said, “What is that, Carl?” Pointing at
him accusingly.
“What?” He asked, turning red.
“A hickey?” Lori asked, frowning.
Carl rubbed at the mark his dad had made. He didn’t dare look in Rick’s
direction. “No,” he answered, unable to come up with a good excuse.
“Rick, do you have anything to say?” Lori asked.
Carl finally allowed himself to look at the man, almost laughing at his shocked
expression, “I’ll talk to him later.”
“Talk to him later? Why not now?” Lori persisted.
“The boy’s almost 14, I’m sure it’s not that big of a deal.”
Lori glared, “You’re just gonna let him run around getting hickeys without
sayin’ anything?”
Rick shrugged, “It’s just one.”
“Unbelievable.”
“Sorry,” was all Carl could muster.
Lori shook her head. Rick remained silent.
“Come on, Carl. Let’s go have that talk,” he said, getting up from the table so
Lori would stop before the situation escalated. The last thing they needed was
scrutiny.
“Thank you,” Lori shook her head, watching the two get up and go upstairs. She
was glad she could count on Rick to teach Carl what he needed to know and
discipline him in ways that she couldn't. Although, she couldn’t see that Rick
kept a possessive hand on the back of Carl’s neck, his fingers grazing the
hickey he’d put there and rubbing over it as they headed up to Carl's room for
the second time.
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