Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/8214209.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Rape/Non-Con, Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Durarara!!
  Relationship:
      Heiwajima_Shizuo/Orihara_Izaya
  Character:
      Heiwajima_Shizuo, Orihara_Izaya
  Additional Tags:
      Underage_Sex, Izaya's_a_detective_lol, But_he's_in_middle_school, So's
      Shizuo, Minor_Heiwajima_Shizuo/Orihara_Izaya, Drug-Induced_Sex,
      Aphrodisiacs, Choking, Hand_Jobs, Grinding, Anal_Fingering, Anal_Sex,
      Nipple_Play, Rape/Non-con_Elements, Multiple_Orgasms, Painful_Pleasure,
      (yes_that's_definitely_a_thing), Blow_Jobs, Rape_Aftermath, Crying,
      Angst, Self-Hatred, Post-Traumatic_Stress_Disorder_-_PTSD, Fear, Implied/
      Referenced_Self-Harm, (this_is_just_an_excuse_to_write_a_shizaya_date-
      rape_fic), (literally_like_barely_even_mentioned), (the_plot_doesn't
      really_matter_tho), nvm_I_actually_am_continuing_it, Other_Additional
      Tags_to_Be_Added
  Stats:
      Published: 2016-10-05 Updated: 2016-10-29 Chapters: 5/? Words: 11894
****** Honeypot ******
by mirror_cannibal
Summary
     Izaya is working for an underground detective agency, and his newest
     mission is to seduce one Heiwajima Shizuo in order to get access to
     certain files in his and his father's apartment. Unfortunately,
     Shizuo has other plans for the overly-confident flea who approached
     him out of nowhere.
     Basically an excuse to write a date-rape fic between Shizuo and
     Izaya, with some angst and rape-aftermath at the end. I'm not sorry.
Notes
     In which Shizuo really is the monster that Izaya's always called him
     out to be
  This work was inspired by
      Honey_Trap by Emma_(KarasunoShugoshin)
***** Chapter 1 *****
Orihara Izaya was in a dangerous line of work—especially for a middle schooler.
He’d known the dangers, welcomed them even, in the beginning. When he’d first
been hired for the underground detective agency in an attempt to make
connections, he thought it’d all be excitement and action. Of course, it was,
but there were other parts to the job as well.
He glanced up from his coffee cup, sliding his gaze across the café until it
rested on a familiar figure in the opposite corner, sipping slowly on his
coffee, hard brown gaze fixed on his phone. Izaya recognized the face under the
mop of blond hair immediately—he’d studied it thoroughly beforehand, of course.
Along with everything else about the guy. Why wouldn’t he? His mission was to
seduce the monster, after all.
Taking a breath, Izaya drained his coffee cup and pushed himself back from the
table. Making his way across the café with a confident step, he planted himself
before the blond—who was the same age as Izaya—who slowly glanced up from his
phone screen with an annoyed expression.
“What do you want?” he said immediately, the irked tones in his voice causing
the words to grate out harshly. Izaya set a smile on his face to cover up his
unease at the unwelcoming reaction—even though it was expected, with the
information he’d been given on the guy’s attitude.
“Hi,” Izaya grinned, making his voice light and friendly. “I was just sitting
over there, and I couldn’t help seeing how lonely you looked over here.” The
man didn’t answer, and Izaya was already pulling a chair from the table even as
he asked, “Mind if I sit down?”
The man frowned, obviously displeased, but Izaya offered his hand anyway as he
sat down, his smile unwavering. “I’m Orihara Izaya. Nice to meet you!”
Hesitantly, the man reached across the table and grasped Izaya’s hand in his
own strong grip. “Heiwajima Shizuo,” he answered, the distrust carved into
every syllable that fell from his lips.
Izaya let out a little laugh. “What a name! I think I’m going to call you
Shizu-chan!” At the blond’s immediate glower and the faint warning rumble in
the back of his throat, Izaya quickly backtracked. “Shizuo, then. Shizuo is
fine. And you can call me Izaya.”
Shizuo eyed him suspiciously. “Why are you talking to me again?”
Another laugh. Who would’ve thought laughing was this tiring? “I just told you!
Were you even listening, Shizu-ch—uh, Shizuo? I thought you looked lonely, so I
came to keep you company!”
“I don’t need company,” the blond frowned again, lifting his coffee cup to take
a sip.
Izaya ignored his comment, instead leaning over the table to breathe in the
smell of Shizuo’s coffee. The blond jumped back, nearly spilling the dark brew
on himself, as Izaya closed the distance between them, smirking up at the
blond. “Mm, smells delicious.”
Shizuo gave him a look, lowering the cup to the table. “It’s just black
coffee,” he said. “It’s literally the cheapest thing here.” The raven was about
half a foot from Shizuo’s face now, and at that proximity he could see all the
emotions flickering through the blond’s eyes. Confusion, suspicion, distrust,
and a faint glimmer of shock all swam in their brown depths.
“Well,” Izaya grinned, “I see you’re a man who likes to save his money.”
“Sure,” Shizuo said, looking at Izaya with a new emotion in his eyes—one that
the raven couldn’t decipher. “Hey…what was your name again?”
Izaya sighed dramatically. “Must I repeat everything for you, Shizuo? You call
me Izaya. I-za-ya. Got it?”
Shizuo gave a displeased “Hm,” but didn’t complain about Izaya’s condescending
tone.
“Say, Shizuo,” Izaya rested his elbows on the table, leaning his head against
his hands as he continued to look into the deep brown of his eyes. “Are you
busy after this?” Of course, he already knew the answer. He’d been tracking the
blond’s routine for the past few months now, wanting his first honeypot mission
to go exactly according to plan.
A shrug. Izaya inwardly kicked himself. Of course he’s not going to agree to
anything that easily…ah, I fucked up. What the hell am I supposed to do now?
“Well,” the deep voice suddenly interrupted Izaya’s thoughts, “I suppose I am.”
A flash of shock passed through Izaya, but he kept his face a mask. “Maybe,” he
continued in as low and seductive a voice as he could manage, a glow of hope in
his chest because Wow, this is actually working! “You want to…head back to your
place?”
Shizuo was silent for a few moments, and Izaya could feel his own pulse racing.
“Yeah,” the blond suddenly agreed, the edges of his mouth curling up, “Yeah,
sure.”

===============================================================================

Those files, those files…they’re supposed to be in his apartment, why can’t I
find them? Izaya’s hands were sweating slightly, but he fought to keep his calm
composure. Shizuo was the son of one of the most influential people involved in
the underground, and it was Izaya’s job to get into his apartment and search
for a specific document that would allow for his own employer to gain a whole
lot of power. Hearing ceramic clanking from the kitchen and heavy footfalls,
Izaya quickly slid the drawer shut and made his way back to the couch, where he
sat as if he’d been waiting the whole time.
“Tea’s ready,” Shizuo’s half-uninterested voice said, and the guy himself
appeared around the corner carrying a tray with two teacups and a steaming pot.
Izaya met his eyes and smiled at him, concealing the twinge of unease he felt
when he got no reaction from the blond. Shizuo set the tray on the table,
sitting on the couch a few feet away from Izaya.
“Why, thank you, Shizuo,” Izaya chuckled, watching Shizuo pour the hot liquid
into the two cups. “You’re so kind to me, ne?”
Shizuo said nothing but “Here,” when he handed one of the cups to Izaya.
Accepting it with a smirk and a subtle wink, Izaya blew gently on the steaming
tea before raising it to his lips. I have to find a way to increase my stay…I
have to find those files. I can’t fail this mission, I’ll never hear the end of
it. My reputation...
“Mm.” Izaya swallowed the burning liquid, which had a surprisingly nice taste
to it. “This is really good tea, Shizuo.”
“My friend got it for me,” Shizuo replied, smiling slightly as he watched Izaya
take another sip. “I’m glad you like it.” Izaya grinned at him. How the hell do
I figure this out from here…If I can’t find the documents, I’ve already
failed…But they have to be in this house somewhere. I just need more time to
look. Maybe if I…? No. Nope. That’d be over the line. I am not sleeping with
this monster.
“Hey, Shizuo,” the raven tipped his cup up again, sipping the delicious drink.
“You live alone?” He’d just said it for means of conversation, but of course he
already knew the answer. He’d done his research.
“I live with my father,” Shizuo said, “Well, technically. He only visits on the
weekends.” Izaya noticed that he hadn’t drunk any of his own tea.
“What, you don’t like the tea?” Izaya asked, nodding to the still-full cup in
Shizuo’s hands while gulping down the last mouthful of his own. “It really is
good. Why would you pour yourself a cup if you weren’t going to drink it?”
Shizuo smiled at him. Izaya wasn’t sure why, but that smile sent a shiver up
his spine. It was a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Oh,” the blond said, his
voice surprised, but that cold smile still on his face. “Sorry, I spaced out
for a bit.” He went to raise the cup to his lips.
Something’s wrong.
Izaya could still taste the burning tea on his tongue, the heat prickling down
his throat and burning in his stomach. Suddenly the heat in his stomach
intensified and he doubled over, gasping with the pain. “Sh-Shizu—” he gasped
out, breathing hard as the fiery feelings swept through his veins, making his
skin hot and prickly, too confined by the heat of his clothes.
“Oh,” Shizuo said again, that cold smile growing colder as he locked eyes with
Izaya. “You seemed so keen to come home with me. Were you not expecting
something like this?” He raised his own full tea cup to Izaya’s lips, the
steaming liquid burning the raven as he kept his mouth shut tight. “You’re too
trusting for your own good,” Shizuo laughed, his thumb forcing Izaya’s jaw open
as he poured the scalding tea down the smaller boy’s throat.
“Gkk! Agh!” Izaya gagged on the burning heat as it ran down his throat, leaving
a trail of prickly discomfort before pooling in his stomach. Once the liquid
was down, it was all he could do to catch his breath, his lungs burning almost
as badly as his insides.
“Come on, Izaya,” Shizuo taunted, tossing the empty cup to the side and
gripping Izaya by the back of the neck, pressing his fingers into the fair
skin. “Did you not want this?” Izaya felt the fingers around his neck, pushing
hard, constricting his air. He gaped his mouth open helplessly, fighting for a
breath that wasn’t there, as every nerve exploded with a fiery heat when Shizuo
touched it.
The fingers loosened for a moment, allowing Izaya a desperate half-gulp of air,
but then they were squeezing tightly again. The blood in his veins thrummed
desperately against the strength of Shizuo’s grip. Izaya could feel the liquid
leaking from his eyes and mouth, the saltiness dripping down his cheek and the
saliva sliding down his chin. How the hell did it end up like this? I just came
here for a few stupid documents. Am I going to die here, at the hand of
this…this monster?
Shizuo suddenly let go of Izaya’s neck altogether, and the raven doubled over
as he coughed and sucked in air desperately. He glared up at the blond, his
chest heaving as he panted, the fire in his veins causing his muscles to twitch
at random.
Shizuo just stared at him and laughed. Laughed. “I’m not going to kill you,” he
chuckled, “Just what do you think was in that tea, anyway? I just wanted to see
your expression when you thought your life was going to end.”
Izaya sucked in another breath, his lungs aching. “Th-then,” he tried to speak,
but his tongue stuttered over every sound he made. “What was-s in th-the t-t-
t—” Somehow nothing he thought in his mind was making its way into the open
air. He found himself unable to control his own tongue.
Shizuo seemed to know what he was saying. “What was in the tea?” the blond
echoed easily, as if showing off the fact he could speak normally. An almost
scary grin cracked across his face, his brown eyes alight with some strange
mixture of rage and excitement and terrifying pleasure. “Let me give you a
hint, I-za-ya.” He hissed Izaya’s name, the half-whispered syllables inducing
an inexplicable shudder through the raven’s small frame. This kid’s insane!
Izaya thought frantically. Then, honoring his promise to ‘give a hint,’ Shizuo
leaned forward and pressed a hand directly over Izaya’s crotch.
Izaya didn’t think he’d ever jumped so badly in his life—his heart pounded in
his chest as all his muscles jerked and spasmed in shock and his body twitched
to escape the offending touch, only…only the touch didn’t feel bad. It didn’t
feel bad at all. The burning sensation across his body fired up at the touch,
and Izaya could feel his own sudden hardness straining at his pants. He found
himself rolling his hips slightly as Shizuo began palming him through his
pants. Wait…did that moan come from me?
“Uuuuhhhhhnnnnn,” Izaya’s head fell back against the couch as the unnatural
noises rolled off his tongue. “Nnnnnnngggggghhhhhhhaaaaaaa…” Shizuo let out a
little chuckle as the raven started to jerk his hips back and forth, trying to
intensify the feeling of Shizuo’s hand on him. Izaya could feel the heat on his
face, knew he was blushing humiliatingly, knew that there were still tears in
his eyes and saliva still dripping down his chin. He knew that right then, he
was literally begging for Heiwajima Shizuo to touch him, begging for more of
the delectable feelings the blond was giving to him. He knew he had no control
over himself anymore.
“Aw, Izaya,” Shizuo laughed, his free hand moving up under the raven’s black T-
shirt, sending every muscle he touched into a spasmic dance. When his
fingertips brushed against Izaya’s sensitive nipples, the smaller man felt a
loud, uncontrollable moan of pleasure tear itself from his throat.
“Sh-Shizu—Shi—” Izaya panted incoherently, gasping and moaning as Shizuo
pinched the pink buds, one after the other, sending brief blasts of pleasure
arcing through the helpless boy’s body. Izaya had absolutely no control over
his own body—his muscles twitched and jerked on their own, his hands were limp
and helpless at his sides, and his voice seemed to fall from his lips without
the permission of his brain. His mind itself was a muddled mess of questions
and exclamations that he wanted to say out loud but couldn’t gain the control
of his tongue to do so.
Shizuo took both hands off Izaya’s body, and Izaya didn’t even recognize the
sudden petulant whine as his own. The blond used both hands to pull the raven’s
shirt over his head, sending a gasp or moan out of Izaya’s throat every time he
brushed against his skin. Izaya found his hips moving on their own, rolling
upwards, his body begging for Shizuo’s touch again. No! Stop it! What the hell
am I doing! I can’t just let him do whatever he wants, this is rape! But no
matter how hard his mind fought, he couldn’t overcome the animalistic urges of
his own body. He drugged me, Izaya screamed inwardly, He drugged me and I was
stupid enough to not see it.
“Loosen up, I-za-ya,” Shizuo murmured, the way he hissed Izaya’s name sending a
shiver down the raven’s spine. The blond ran his hands down Izaya’s torso,
sending waves of fire through the smaller man’s muscles. Izaya jerked, small
moans and whines escaping him as Shizuo unclasped the raven’s belt with a
single smooth motion and yanked the waistline of his pants down, exposing his
achingly hard need for Shizuo’s touch.
“Sh-Shizu-o!” Izaya cried out as Shizuo trailed his finger lightly up the
raven’s weeping erection, circling the tip. The simple motion turned every
thought in Izaya’s head to mush, and every sound that came out of his mouth was
gibberish. Shizuo paused in his motions for a moment to tug his own shirt over
his head and cast it to the side.
“Louder, Izaya,” Shizuo grinned down at him, sliding his fingers through the
weeping liquid that escaped Izaya’s erection and spreading the juices across
the raven’s lower torso. Izaya’s back arched as Shizuo curled the fingers of
his other hand around Izaya’s boner, sending the smaller man’s muscles into a
spasmic dance. Every inhale was a gasp and every exhale was a moan, and Izaya
couldn’t even fully comprehend what was happening to him; all he knew was that
it felt incredibly good.
Suddenly Izaya felt a single digit slide into his opening. A loud groan escaped
him, pleasure dripping from the unexpected noise and sending waves of alarm
blaring through his shocked mind. But Izaya had no control over his own body
anymore, and his spine was already arching and his hips were already moving and
he was sliding himself down onto the digit, then up again, feeling the finger
curl and twist inside of him. Bursts of pleasurable heat exploded inside of him
as another digit slid in, the two fingers scissoring inside of him to stretch
his fiery muscles.
“See, look how much you’re enjoying it,” Shizuo grinned, his smile going in and
out of focus in Izaya’s overwhelmed eyes. He pushed deeper, a third finger
stretching the tight muscles more and causing more shudders to run through
Izaya. The raven’s back arched, his muscles tightening around the digits, his
spine curling and uncurling to move himself up and down over the fingers. Moans
escaped his mouth, louder with every breath. Why am I going along with this?
Why can’t I even control my own body? What has he done to me?
Shizuo’s free hand clamped over Izaya’s painfully hard erection, suddenly
rubbing quickly up and down on the heated flesh, the friction causing Izaya to
cry out and clench his muscles down on the fingers. He tried to yell something
out, but all his sounds came out as pleasured moans and sighs. “Sh-Shi—” he
tried, but his words were quickly overtaken by his own pants. A heavy shudder
passed through his entire body, his muscles clenching and unclenching,
contracting over and over until he felt the splatter of his own liquid against
his stomach, but the heat wasn’t gone. The heat wasn’t gone at all, his
erection was still painfully erect, the sweat was still dripping down his body
and the fire was still burning through his muscles.
“That’s once,” Shizuo whispered, his words just barely registering in Izaya’s
foggy mind. “Let’s see how many more times you can come for me.” The blond’s
fingers slid out of Izaya, an unrecognizably childish whine slipping past the
raven’s defenses as Shizuo did so, letting out a little laugh. Izaya breathed
in sharply at the feel of wet warmth over his sensitive nipple, glancing down
to see Shizuo’s blond hair in front of him. Shizuo licked once more, dragging
his tongue over Izaya’s nipple. The smaller man melted into the feeling,
involuntarily leaning his head back as a low moan tore itself from his throat.
Izaya began panting, his breath coming quick and leaving him light-headed, as
Shizuo began to suck on the sensitive bud. The sound of a belt unbuckling and
fabric sliding over skin barely registered in Izaya’s lost mind until he felt
the blond’s wet erection against the inside of his thigh.
“N-nnnn—” Izaya tried to protest, but the words refused to form on his tongue.
Shizuo brought up a hand to pinch his other nipple and the raven crumbled under
his touch, reduced to a mumbling mess beneath the blond. Shizuo lifted his
head, and Izaya inwardly cringed at the way his brown gaze hungrily took in
Izaya’s heated face and sweat-coated skin, under which muscles burned and
twitched at random.
“Ready?” Shizuo asked softly, teasingly. Because he knew Izaya couldn’t think
straight. Because he knew Izaya’s tongue couldn’t form the sounds he wanted.
Because he knew that Izaya had no choice. Because he’s a fucking monster! Izaya
fumed inwardly, his thighs jerking to the sides as Shizuo lightly touched them.
Suddenly—too suddenly—Shizuo’s erection was sliding past the tight ring of
muscles at Izaya’s entrance. It was sudden, and yet…Izaya’s body moved on its
own again, his back arching past what he would’ve thought possible, his knees
bending around Shizuo’s back to draw him closer, his fingers clawing at the
fabric of the couch beneath him in any attempt to push his hips down onto
Shizuo’s length. Somehow, in some way, the feeling of Shizuo’s pulsing organ
inside of him made Izaya crazy, made him want more and more of it. Before he
knew it, the blond was in to the hilt, and Izaya still didn’t feel full.
The raven moaned helplessly, begging for more while at the same time pleading
for it to end. Sweat ran down his body, heat radiated off his skin, his muscles
contracted at random as the pleasurable feelings raced through him. His ankles
were locked behind Shizuo’s back, his toes constantly curling and uncurling
with every slight move Shizuo made. His fingers clenched into fists then
unclenched, his nails scratching at the couch then at his own skin.
Shizuo stayed in to the hilt for a while, holding Izaya’s hips still, as the
raven struggled to feel more. Thoughts and feelings were racing through Izaya’s
head, conflicting and confusing in his drug-numbed brain. One thought rose
above the rest, forcing itself past his lips. “Move,” he gasped out, his body
twitching against Shizuo’s grasp on his hips. “Move.” As if he’d been waiting
for Izaya to say that, Shizuo smiled a smile that didn’t reach his eyes and
slid out then back in again.
The shivers ran through Izaya’s body, growing more and more intense. His
muscles contracted around Shizuo’s length, pulling him deeper every time. The
friction was building, every movement sending a moan out of the smaller raven
and causing his fingernails to scrape against the fabric of the couch beneath
him. “Hnnn,” he groaned, biting his lip as the sound rushed through him,
“Mmmm!”
Suddenly Shizuo’s hands were underneath Izaya’s bottom, causing the raven’s
muscles to twitch and burn from his touch on the fiery skin. The blond lifted
slightly, holding Izaya’s hips off the couch, sliding in all the way at the new
angle. He brushed something inside the raven that made Izaya yelp, his voice
raising to what would be an embarrassing level if he’d been in his right mind.
A wave of heat swept through him, a coil of pleasure building deep inside him
where Shizuo had touched. He shuddered, his cries building in volume and
intensity. Shizuo’s name rose to the tip of Izaya’s tongue, and he sank his
teeth into his own lip to keep the name from slipping out.
“Hnnnnn!” Izaya groaned against his teeth, tasting metallic blood on his tongue
as he bit down harder, the fire rushing through his body in waves as Shizuo hit
the same spot again. Unable to hold back the second time, Izaya gasped out
“Shizuo!” as he climaxed once more, his entire body shaking and shuddering with
the loss of control.
“Twice,” Shizuo laughed, grinding slowly against that sweet spot deep inside
Izaya. “I’m sure you can do much better than that.” Izaya’s head fell back
against the couch, his entire body jerking and contracting against the feelings
that Shizuo’s throbbing organ was giving him. Sweat rolled down the shorter
male’s body, and saliva slid down his chin. His chest heaved with every breath
and the air rushed past his teeth faster and faster with every passing second.
Izaya didn’t know how much more of this he could take. The pleasure was
becoming painful, the feelings racing through his body becoming terrifying.
Every time a muscle jerked, every time a moan slipped out, Izaya was reminded
of how little control he really had. Shizuo held all the cards, controlling
every feeling that tortured the raven. Izaya panted, struggling to hold back
his moans so that he could just breathe, as his lungs were beginning to ache
from the lack of full breaths. His muscles were tired, so tired from the
constant contractions.
“Sh-Shizuo,” Izaya forced out, feeling incredibly proud of himself as soon as
he was able to finally get the sounds out amidst the pants and groans that
surrounded his syllables.
“What is it, I-za-ya?” Shizuo murmured, and Izaya could feel the blond’s grip
circle around to settle on his hips, fingers pressing tight against the soft
skin there. Izaya couldn’t help the moan that escaped him from that simple
touch.
“St-Stop,” Izaya groaned, then gasped as Shizuo slammed against his prostate.
“Oh? You want me to stop, do you?” Shizuo grinned as he drew back and slammed
back in again, feeling Izaya unravel beneath him. His next words came out low
and intimidating. “Don’t tell me what to do, flea.”
Izaya’s entire body gave up at that, his mind falling apart and his muscles
giving into the constant jerking motions that controlled them. “Aaaahhhhnnn,”
Izaya moaned as Shizuo began pounding against his sweet spot again and again,
faster and faster. “Sh-Shizu—ohh…mmmnnnnngggghhh…”
“I won’t stop.” Shizuo smiled, but it wasn’t really a smile—just a cold,
unfeeling, cruel curl of his lips. “I won’t stop until you stop.”
What the hell does he mean by that?!? Izaya was feeling too overwhelmed to even
think. And yet, he could almost grasp the idea that Shizuo was talking about.
He understood how, with every thrust Shizuo gave, his own body responded by
pushing down onto the blond. He wants me to stop…reacting? Reciprocating? How
am I supposed to stop, he drugged me! With another monstrous slam into Izaya’s
prostate, the raven felt his body undergo the same shuddering, convulsing
motions it had before as he ejaculated for a third time.
“Three times,” Shizuo echoed Izaya’s thoughts, “That’s twice now you’ve come
just from me being in your ass. Do you like these feelings, Izaya? Do they feel
good? Do you want to feel even more?”
Izaya struggled to regain control of his lungs, sucking in a quick breath to
respond. “N-No,” he whined, even though his spine was pushing his hips down
onto Shizuo’s length. “Stop—stop it—no more,” he panted, a harsh stinging in
his eyes reminding him what tears were.
“No more?” Shizuo repeated, that same scary grin still on his face. “No more?
And yet you’re still pushing down onto my dick? How lewd, Izaya.” He gripped
Izaya’s hips tightly, and Izaya felt the blond pushing in to the hilt, grinding
against his prostate. The raven’s body dissolved into shudders again, his mind
falling apart under the overwhelming feelings. He didn’t even register what was
happening to him until Shizuo laughed and said, “Four times, Izaya. And in such
a short amount of time, too. You really enjoy this, don’t you?” He pulled back,
allowing Izaya a half-second to regain his breath, before thrusting back in at
a normal pace.
Izaya groaned, feeling his own sticky cum on his lower stomach, glancing down
to see the clear-white thick liquid sliding down his skin, pooling on the
fabric of the couch beneath him. “No more,” he panted again, forcing the words
out with a numb tongue. “I can’t—I can’t come anymore.”
“Oh, I’m sure that’s a lie,” Shizuo laughed, and Izaya tensed up as the blond’s
tight grip moved from one of his hips to his achingly hard erection. “See? Look
how hard you still are. Granted, I did give you an incredible amount of
aphrodisiacs, especially since you’re so small.” He let out another laugh as
moan after moan spilled out of Izaya’s mouth. “Well, we’ll just have to see how
long it takes to wear off, right?”
Shizuo began to move his hand up and down over Izaya’s weeping erection,
leaving the smaller boy to dissolve into convulsions and moans beneath him. The
feeling of Shizuo against his prostate had been one thing—but now that feeling,
paired with the deliberate attention to Izaya’s hard-on was almost too much for
the raven to handle. His moans built in volume, his muscles tightening around
Shizuo’s length to pull him deeper with every thrust. Izaya’s eyelids slid
half-shut, and everything kept going in and out of focus as his mind became
completely and utterly overwhelmed with everything that was happening to him.
“Oh?” Shizuo laughed again, but the sound was fuzzy in the raven’s head.
“That’s five times. Ahh, you’re still coming. Izaya, look at all this!” His
voice rose in what almost sounded like excitement, and Izaya slowly focused his
eyes on Shizuo’s fingers in front of his face, coated in a thick white-ish
liquid. “Ah,” Shizuo suddenly moaned, his voice losing its confidence for a
moment as he drew the slick finger back to grip Izaya’s waist. “I’m going to
come inside of you, Izaya. Do you like that? Does the thought excite you?”
Izaya couldn’t even think well enough to voice his immediate rejection.
Suddenly there was a strange sensation deep inside of him—a hot liquid pooled
inside, filling him and making his stomach ache. Izaya let out a moan of
discomfort, yet it held an undertone of pleasure to it. He felt the loss of
Shizuo’s pulsing length inside of him, but the sperm filled him up just as
well. “Ugh,” Izaya groaned, his nails scraping against the fabric of the couch
beneath him as his body twitched, his member still achingly hard. “Sh-Shizuo,”
he panted, finally able to catch his breath now that the blond had stopped
abusing his prostate. “Are—are you…done?”
Shizuo only grinned in response, ducking his head down out of Izaya’s field of
vision. Unable to gather the energy to crane his neck, the raven simply laid
his head down against the couch in defeat. Suddenly his entire body tensed up
at the feeling of the blond’s tongue on his length. Izaya felt a cry of intense
pleasure tear past his lips, a wet warmth engulfing his tip as a rough hand
began pumping the bottom of his shaft.
“Shi—Shizuo!” Izaya cried out, rolling his hips into the fantastic feeling.
Despite the exhaustion weighing him down, his muscles reacted strongly to the
attention Shizuo was finally giving to Izaya’s painfully hard erection. The
warmth disappeared for a second, and Izaya didn’t even recognize his own half-
scream of pleasure when his body shook and his ejaculation arced through the
air for the fifth time.
“My, my,” Shizuo laughed, “I didn’t even think it was possible for a single
person to come this much in one night. You’ve exceeded my expectations, Orihara
Izaya.” Izaya shuddered once more, another moan grating over the back of his
throat before spilling into the open air as the blond took Izaya in his mouth
again.
That was the point Izaya could remember up to. That was the point where,
despite the fiery feelings still racing through him, the exhaustion and
overwhelming shock of everything that had happened finally caught up with him
and his mind sank away. That was the point where Orihara Izaya finally lost
consciousness.
***** Chapter 2 *****
Chapter Notes
     still not sorry
Izaya blinked his eyes open slowly, taking in the sight of the unfamiliar
ceiling above him. He slowly came to his senses, memories from the night before
racing through his head.
“Maybe…” His own voice echoed in his mind, “You want to…head back to your
place?”
A laugh, a familiar laugh, echoed from Izaya’s recent memories. “You seemed so
keen to come home with me. Were you not expecting something like this?...You’re
too trusting for your own good.”
Now, Izaya remembered his weakness from the night before. He remembered how
he’d crumbled against Shizuo’s touch, how he’d melted into the blond’s grip and
how he’d given in to every feeling that the monster had given him. “That wasn’t
me,” he whispered, not even realizing he’d said the words aloud until he heard
them in the still air.
The breath began to race through him, aching in his lungs and causing his heart
to pound almost painfully. Izaya wrapped his arms around his stomach, his arms
coming into contact with sticky liquid, the terror making him nauseous. “What
the hell was I thinking,” he choked out, his throat tightening as tears began
to sting at his eyes. “What did he do to me?”
His whole body hurt. Pain flashed through his muscles and joints, pausing to
pound dully around his hips, where he could still feel the pressure of Shizuo’s
grip. Tears began to leak out of his eyes as his own voice from the night
before echoed in his head. “No more…I can’t—I can’t come anymore.” He reached
up a hand to tug at his hair, pulling his bangs over his face as the tears
flowed freely.
“Why…why would he do that to me,” he sobbed quietly, curling his hand into a
fist and causing the pain to leap to his scalp. He only pulled harder,
struggling to use the pain as a distraction, as if it would undo the very
situation he had gotten himself into.
Izaya lay silently as the tears poured from his eyes. His fist tightened
against his hair, pulling it down, and his other arm was still wrapped
protectively around his stomach. How the hell did I do this to myself? How do I
get out of this? What have I done? Izaya’s knuckles were white from the force
of his grip, his scalp screaming in pain as he yanked the black hair over his
red eyes, the salty drops of liquid still silently escaping his eyes and
soaking into the pillow.
Izaya clenched his teeth against the scenes flashing through his memory,
yanking harder on his hair and pressing the fingers of his other hand hard into
his own skin. He was struggling to breathe now, each breath cutting into his
lungs like one of his own blades. He could feel his heartbeat increase,
pounding through his chest, until he could feel the blood thrumming through his
fingertips. His throat ached, tightened around his inhales, and his eyes stung.
This is pathetic, he thought to himself, I’M pathetic.
Finally Izaya was able to draw in a full breath—he gasped it in, filling his
lungs painfully. The exhale came out stuttered, his throat closing at random
intervals and making it hard to breathe naturally. Izaya clenched his teeth,
screwing his leaking eyes shut as he drew in another shaky breath. What the
hell am I doing…Why can’t I move…How did he make me so weak?
The silence of the tears was ending, and the sobs began to wrack his shoulders.
Izaya felt a painful sob tear itself from his throat, tightening his grip on
his own hair to pull it over his face as his entire body shook with every
stuttered release of breath. Izaya sucked in another breath, sliding his entire
arm across his face as if it would hide the tears that already streaked his
cheeks—as if it would hide his own weakness from his own eyes. He bit his lip
harshly as small moans of pure agony began to escape him with every exhale.
Izaya had no idea what to do. He hated himself at that moment, hated the way
he’d gotten himself into that situation, hated the way he’d broken down because
of it. He held his breath for a moment, the now-soundless sobs barely shaking
his shoulders as he held them down with every ounce of energy he had. At last
he sucked in a full breath, then two.
“I didn’t—” Izaya whispered, “I didn’t want this.” The clarity of emotion in
his own voice scared him. Izaya drew in a shuddering breath. Pulling his arm
slowly across his face to reveal his eyes, Izaya stared blankly up at the
ceiling. “I can’t believe I would do that,” he whispered to himself, barely
able to even fathom the situation he’d gotten himself into. He couldn’t even
remember the last time he’d actually gone in over his head in any event. “I
can’t believe I would just let him do that to me.” Izaya had always been in
perfect control, even in the most surprising of circumstances.
And yet…
And yet, here he was now. Breaking down. Izaya sat up, his head spinning
weirdly and a groan escaping him as the pain in his joints and muscles fired
up. His hips ached like they’d never ached before, and every muscle felt like
it’d been stretched to the max and snapped back into place. Pain pounded dully
in his wrists, and Izaya was sure he could see the imprints of the monster’s
grip on the pale skin.
Izaya’s entire body tensed up, every muscle going rigid as a new feeling made
its way through him. “Ugh…” he moaned softly as he felt hot, thick liquid slide
through him, spilling out onto the fabric of the couch he sat on. Sudden
feelings of disgust and regret flashed in his head again, his body screaming in
pain and discomfort as if in response to those feelings.
“I just…” Izaya mumbled slightly to himself, trying to wake himself up. “I just
need to get home. Take a shower. Take a nap. Then it’ll all be in the past.
Hell, maybe I’m taking a nap right now. Maybe this is all a dream.” He stared
down at his hands, fighting the urge to throw up. His next words came out
softly, barely even a whisper. “Please let it be a dream.”
Even as he thought it, he regretted it. Thinking of a better reality only hurt
him more when he realized that this was his reality. This had really happened.
He’d really gotten himself into that. “Get up, you idiot,” Izaya hissed
fiercely at himself, surprising himself with his own ferocity. “Quit moping
around and take care of yourself already. How the hell else do you think you’ll
sort this out?”
With a fantastic effort, he shoved himself up off the couch on shaking limbs,
his skin scrawling as more semen slid down his leg as he stood up. His aching
legs could barely hold his weight, and he half-fell against the couch again. He
glanced around the room, seeing his own clothes nearby, crumpled on the ground
but seemingly clean.
When the clock sang a little tune, Izaya jumped a mile, his heart thudding
through his chest. His gaze snapped across the room, where the clock in
question pointed to the time. 10:00 in the morning?? Izaya rubbed his eyes,
ignoring the stabbing pain of a headache that shot through his forehead at the
motion. There’s no fucking way. Suddenly he remembered that if he was in
Shizuo’s house, Shizuo was probably there, too.
“But at ten in the morning?” Izaya murmured softly, before the terror could
freeze his limbs, suspicious gaze darting around, neither his eyes nor his ears
picking up any traces of the blond monster. He’s probably at school already. I
know his schedule…yeah, he’s at school. He wouldn’t miss it, just because of
me. He’d just leave me here, to find my own way out.
Slightly comforted by the fact he was alone, Izaya considered taking a shower,
even as his mind was already repelling the idea. “Not in this monster’s house,”
Izaya hissed to himself, despite the uncomfortable stickiness of his skin.
Recalling where Shizuo had gone the night before to make tea, Izaya made his
way—slowly and shakily—to the kitchen, finding a roll of paper towels.
“Better than nothing,” he grumbled, beginning to wipe the most of the
stickiness off. Even as he touched his own skin, it crawled in discomfort,
remembering the rough touches from the night before. He cleaned himself
hastily, tossing the paper towels away with an impulsive sound that could
almost be described as a whine. Quickly making his way back to the living room,
Izaya gathered his clothes and slid them on quickly, his hands beginning to
shake as his reality really started to set in.
“He raped me,” Izaya breathed disbelievingly, and somehow the words aloud sank
in more than they had just in his mind. “That monster raped me.” He stared
blankly at the ground for a moment, before shaking his head violently and
pulling his shirt on. “It’s ok,” he whispered, tugging his jacket on over his
shirt and pulling the familiar comforting fabric around his body. “It’s ok.
It’s ok. It’s ok.”
He took a deep breath, feeling the air shudder through his lungs and fighting
back the tears that threatened his eyes with their sting. “It’s ok,” he
repeated again. I’m not going to cry, I won’t cry, I can’t cry, not in this
monster’s house, I just need to get home, I just need to get home and take a
shower and everything will be fine, it’ll all be fine, it’ll be like it never
even happened if I just pretend it didn’t happen, it’s ok, it’s ok, it’s ok…
Oh, shit. The documents. Suddenly Izaya remembered the reason that started the
horrible escalation of events—the beginning of this horrible nightmare. Fuck,
if I don’t get his dad’s documents, after everything he put me through…
Steeling himself to walk, Izaya began searching through Shizuo’s apartment. The
living room was already clean—he’d checked that the night before, while Shizuo
had been making the tea—so he moved to the next most obvious place. Walking on
trembling legs down the hallway, he opened one door to find the bathroom, then
opened the next to find a bedroom. Aha!
Making his way immediately to a desk in the corner, Izaya breathlessly started
rifling through the drawers, coming across a beige file with CLASSIFIED stamped
over the front in an angry red ink. This is almost too easy, he found himself
grinning, ignoring his most recent memories, as he flipped through the papers
inside, determining that it was, in fact, the file he had been searching for.
Sliding the file beneath the fabric of his jacket, Izaya took another breath
and made his way back down the hallway. He paused outside the bathroom, ducking
his head in for a second to study his reflection in the mirror. His dark hair
hung limp over his face, which was white as a sheet in contrast. His usually-
bright red eyes were dull and swirling with mixed emotions. Beneath his
emotion-filled eyes were dark circles of worry and fear. Izaya let out a shaky
breath, running an equally shaky hand over his head to fix the disheveled hair,
pulling the strands to cover his pale face.
I have to go, I have to get home, then everything will be fine, everything will
be fine, it’s ok, it’s ok, it’s ok. Crossing his arms tightly over his stomach,
where the files were pressed under his jacket, Izaya forced his trembling legs
to carry him to the front door. He opened it, nervously glancing up and down
the hallway before making his way to the elevator. It’s ok, it’s ok, it’s ok.
The elevator was too slow. Izaya wanted to pace to and from each of its
claustrophobic walls, but his legs wouldn’t move. The elevator shuddered once,
filling Izaya with an irrational terror. The underlying fear still lay in his
veins, ready to fire up at any slight provocation. I should’ve taken the
stairs, what if someone else gets on the elevator, I can’t deal with another
person this close right now, what if the elevator breaks down, what if I can’t
get out with the documents, what if…
Izaya took a deep breath, proud of the way it inhaled smoothly into his lungs
instead of shuddering like it had before. He started when he felt the elevator
stop with an alarmingly loud ding, the doors sliding open smoothly. Izaya could
see the receptionist sitting, bored, behind the desk. Beyond that…the door
beckoned. With a small breath of relief, Izaya made his way towards the escape,
but…
“Good morning, Orihara Izaya.”
A deep, rumbling voice came from behind Izaya. He jumped and turned, feeling
his aching neck crack at the sudden snap of motion. Standing beside the
elevator, on the side that Izaya hadn’t looked in his anxiety to rush towards
the exit, was a tall blond boy leaning against the wall. His brown eyes gleamed
with some indecipherable emotion, and the smile that curled at his lips was
cold and cruel. Izaya found all his muscles frozen and stood stock-still in
front of the monster, his heart racing and his mind whirling.
Shizuo laughed. “Well, more like good afternoon. It certainly took you a while
to wake up, didn’t it.”
Izaya struggled to breathe, his throat tightening around every inhale as a
sharp sting threatened tears once more. He fought them back with all his
strength, and it took all the bravery in the world for him to force his gaze to
meet those demonic brown eyes.
“I know what you were looking for,” Shizuo grinned. “I trust you found it
easily. I did leave it in a pretty convenient place. I wasn’t sure if you would
even look for it after what happened last night.”
Wordlessly, his movements jerky, Izaya unclenched his arms from where they were
wrapped protectively around his stomach, drawing out the file. Shizuo chuckled
again.
“Well, I guess you did find it. And you had the courage to take it, despite
everything.” There was an unmistakable threat under his words.
Fear pumping through his veins, Izaya could hardly breathe. Not wanting to get
any closer to the monster, terrified of what might happen if he left with the
file, the raven merely loosened the muscles of his fingers, letting the beige
file fall to the floor between them.
He then turned and left, hunching his shoulders against the laugh that followed
him and not even bothering to hide the quickness of his step. He rushed out the
door, finally—finally—making his way into the open air, taking a relieved
breath as he finally escaped the prison of that horrible apartment building. He
ran the whole way home, tears blurring his vision.

===============================================================================

When Izaya finally got back to his own apartment—which was thankfully empty, as
his parents were out of town and his sisters were in school—he slammed the door
behind him then slid down the side of the smooth wood and leaned against it. “I
will not cry,” he murmured to himself, even as the tears were overflowing from
his eyes, sliding down his cheeks. “I will not cry,” he whispered again, but
his voice was already lost in the sobs.
This time, in the privacy of his own empty home, he didn’t just sob. He wailed.
Every exhale was a sound of intense pain that shocked him to the core, and
every inhale was a desperate grab for air before the next painful sound was
torn from his lungs. He sat on the floor, losing track of the time he spent
drowning in his own tears. He couldn’t even remember the last time he’d cried
this hard—he didn’t think he’d ever cried this hard in his whole life.
And it’s all that monster’s fault.
The memory of Shizuo’s gleaming brown eyes, alight with excitement and rage and
pleasure flashed through Izaya’s mind. The raven put an arm over his mouth to
muffle the sounds that escaped him, but it was useless and the arm eventually
dropped to the floor as his cries grew in volume and desperation. That kid was
insane. He was a complete psycho!
It seemed like years passed with him just sitting there, sobbing and wailing.
Eventually his tears ran out, and his body was wracked with only dry sobs. “St-
Stop it,” he stuttered between the sobs, “S-Stop crying.” He wiped an arm
roughly across his face, trying to wipe away the tears. “Stop crying!” he
suddenly screamed, the explosion of emotion terrifying him. With an enormous
effort, Izaya shoved himself to his feet and forced his legs to move him to his
bathroom.
“It’s ok,” he found himself murmuring again, “It’s ok, it’s ok, it’s ok.” Just
like I planned earlier…I get home, take a shower, then pretend nothing
happened. And nothing happened. Finally reaching his bathroom, he turned on the
water and tore off his dirty clothes, vowing to burn them immediately after.
Stepping into the shower, he let the burning hot water slide across his skin,
washing away the essence of Shizuo.
Suddenly a memory was flashing in his mind, a memory of that burning hot tea
sliding down his throat, and it was too similar to the feeling of the shower
water now. Before he knew what he was even doing, Izaya heard a strangled cry
of fear and pain that could only be his because he was the only one there, and
the next thing he knew, he was on the ground and pain was pounding where his
elbow and hip had hit the tile and the steam was coating his skin uncomfortably
and he had to get out, get out, because he didn’t know what would happen to him
if he didn’t.
Izaya crawled into the hallway, the hot water dripping onto the ground and his
body trembling uncontrollably, small whines of pain slipping past his lips with
every exhale. “Louder, Izaya,” he heard from the depths of his memory, a vivid
image of the monster’s face rising in his mind’s eye.
Suddenly feeling the urge to vomit, Izaya ducked back into the steamy bathroom
to hang his head over the toilet. The acidic bile rose in his throat, cutting
off his breath as it burned his throat and mouth. There was a pause in which he
sucked in a single breath, and then his shoulders were wracked with another
desperate heave to empty his stomach’s contents. His entire body was trembling,
the tears running down his cheeks as his shaking hands clutched at the sides of
the toilet with a white-knuckled grip.
After an eternity of choking on the acidic vomit, Izaya’s body finally took
pity on him and allowed him a breath of air, then two, until he was sure the
vomiting had ended. Falling back from the toilet with a resigned sigh of
exhaustion, Izaya leaned his head back against the wall and let the heavy steam
filter over his body.
“I give up,” he sobbed quietly, not even remembering when he’d started to cry
again. “I give up. Stop putting me through this. I never asked for this. I give
up.” A few moments passed with only the sound of the water from the shower
beating against the floor, when Izaya’s own words finally sank in.
“What am I saying?” he shook his head, feeling a strange smile ghost across his
face. “What the fuck am I saying? I work for a fucking underground detective
agency—of course I asked for this shit.”
“What the fuck was I thinking?”
***** Chapter 3 *****
Chapter Notes
     less sorry than ever
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Izaya tugged his black jacket over his blood-red shirt, glancing in the mirror
and deciding he still liked this uniform so much better than the light blue one
he’d been given. He stared at his reflection for a moment, watching the red of
his shirt reflect in his eyes and practicing his maniacal grin. He’d quit his
old job, the one at the underground detective agency, after the incident with
Shizuo.
Now, he worked for himself—he was creating a name for himself as an information
broker. He was his own boss now. No one could tell him what to do. No one could
control him. No one could ever control him again.
There was really no need for Izaya to even attend high school. He had taught
himself everything he needed to know in life, anyway, and he didn’t
particularly like the authority that the teachers tended to think they had over
him. And yet…
Being an information broker meant knowing things. And of course Orihara Izaya
knew everything. He’d already checked the names of the students in the high
school he was going to—it would’ve been strange if he hadn’t.
And there was one name on the list he’d recognized immediately on sight. One
name that made his stomach clench. One name that reminded him of those rage-
filled eyes. One name that made him reach for a knife, and feel the need to arm
himself. One name that made him turn the knife to himself, to slice at the
bruises he swore were still encircling his wrists.
Because how could Izaya possibly forget a name like Heiwajima Shizuo?
Izaya picked up a shiny blade from where it lay on his bed, begging for the
raven’s touch. He slid a finger along the edge, as if testing the sharpness,
even though he knew it was razor-sharp as always. He grinned into the metal,
watching how it warped his pale face and shining red eyes. He felt the name
experimentally on his lips. “Heiwajima Shizuo,” he snarled, “Heiwajima Shizuo,
Heiwajima Shizuo, Heiwajima Shizuo.” Suddenly he laughed—it wasn’t really a
laugh, more of a harsh barking exhale, but a ‘laugh’ would be the only word to
describe it.
“Heiwajima Shizuo, I’m going to make your life a living hell.”
Chapter End Notes
     this chapter is shit
     it doesn't even deserve to be called a chapter
     but whatever
     review if you want, kudos to you for reading the whole thing ^_^
     UPDATE: I might add to this, so lemme know if you want a continuation
***** Chapter 4 *****
Chapter Notes
     Yes, I know what you're thinking. "Ehhhh???!!!/!?!?!?11!! Author,
     you're actually going to continue this??!?!?!!!!?!
     Whyyyy?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!?????!"
     Truth is, I have no answer for that.
     Also I ran out of chapter title ideas, so I'm just gonna call them by
     their numbers 'cause I'm a boring person like that.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Izaya sat silently next to Shinra, watching Shizuo pant in the emptiness of the
school’s field. Limp, inert bodies lay around him, twisted at awkward
angles—Izaya couldn’t imagine any of them moving again. The blond straightened,
and the sun flashed across the maniacal grin that twisted those devilish lips.
Izaya ran his finger over the smooth of the blade in his pocket, reminding
himself again and again that he was armed now, he was better trained now, he
could protect himself as well as deal some of his own damage now.
“I’m Orihara Izaya. Nice to meet you!”
“…Heiwajima Shizuo.”
“What a name! I think I’m going to call you Shizu-chan.”
Izaya remembered the immediate growl of displeasure that had echoed from the
blond’s throat when that nickname had left his own. Now, watching Shizuo
standing alone in the field, drowning in the pleasure of his own strength,
Izaya felt his own slightly-maniacal smile pull at the corners of his mouth.
“Does this make you happy, Izaya?” Izaya glanced over, having almost forgotten
that Shinra had been next to him. The brunet was grinning back at him, brown
eyes wide and innocent.
Izaya allowed the pressure around his mouth to fade, collapsing his almost-
smile. “Yes,” he answered slowly, deliberately, keeping his voice as neutral as
his face. “I suppose it does.”
Shinra kept that innocent grin on his own face. “Why don’t you say hello,
then?” Shinra didn’t exactly know the whole story—of course, what kind of
information broker gave out information for free? The brunet was aware,
however, that Izaya had some ‘unpleasant history’ with Shizuo, and would he
throw the raven a curiously strange glance every time the ‘strongest man of
Ikebukuro’ was mentioned. “I’m sure he’d be glad to have a chat, ne?”
Izaya stared blankly at Shinra for a moment, before dropping his chin and
letting out a huff of air that couldn’t have been described as a laugh any more
than it could a forceful exhale. “Yeah,” he said, his voice soft. “I should say
hello, shouldn’t I. After all, it’s only common manners.”
“I’m Orihara Izaya. Nice to meet you!”
He tightened his hand on the grip of his blade, locking his knees and moving
himself forward, towards the monster. A tingling reminder of pain ran through
his hips, encircling his wrists. He grit his teeth against it, pushing away
memories. The blond was facing away from him, catching his breath still after
the rush of the fight. Izaya licked his lips as he approached, working his
throat slightly to ensure that his words would come out clear and smooth.
Too close. Stop now. Izaya stopped suddenly—close enough to the monster, but
not so close that a single step and a swing of the fist could possibly connect
with his own body.
“I think I’m going to call you Shizu-chan.”
“Oi,” he called out, loud enough to get Shizuo’s attention but soft enough that
it exerted confidence he wasn’t quite sure he even had. “Oi, Shizu-chan.” The
blond turned his head, slowly. Izaya could feel his heart beating faster, the
blood pounding through his head. He gripped the blade in his pocket until he
could feel the edge of the hilt digging into his own skin.
The moment the blond locked eyes with him, the grin across his face only
widened. “You!” Shizuo called out, a terrifying rage heightening the single
syllable. Already the movement was clear, and as the monster lunged forward,
Izaya was already prepared. Forcing his almost-numb limbs to respond, he
whipped his hand out of his pocket, the glint of the metallic blade catching
the sun. Stepping slightly to the side to avoid the fist that was swinging at
him with too much power, Izaya unthinkingly swung his own hand up, swiping the
blade through the air, and then something that met more resistance than air.
As he completed the motion, an arc of crimson seemed to hang in the sky, the
sun glimmering off its redness. The blood caught on the blade, shining. The
monster had stopped moving, was now standing with a hand over his chest—over
his torn shirt and the trickle of blood from the slashed line that wept across
his skin.
A sudden burst of confidence tingled through Izaya’s veins, and he felt a grin
of pleasure pull at his lips as he held up the blood-slicked blade like a
trophy, pointing it at the frozen monster. He couldn’t decipher the expression
on the blond’s face—was it pain? Anger? Confusion?
Shizuo smiled. “Hello, Izaya-kun,” he spat out the honorific. “What a nice
greeting—and it’s been so long since we’ve seen each other. You’re not going to
give me a kiss?”
Rage boiled beneath the surface of Izaya’s skin, but he kept his face composed.
“I wouldn’t want to touch your dirty lips, Shizu-chan,” he answered, the
iciness of his own voice masking the anger. “Who knows where they’ve been—for a
stupid dog like you, most likely eating out of the neighbor’s garbage,
perhaps?”
“Oh?” Shizuo let out an unnerving chuckle. “Are you calling yourself garbage,
Izaya? Even I didn’t go so low as to call you names—it was just I-za-ya.” He
hissed out the name, drawing out the syllables like frozen blades spat out with
the intention of sinking into the raven’s heart—the pain from the poisoned tips
hurting even more so than the words that the monster had uttered before the
three half-whispered syllables. For a moment Izaya couldn’t breathe—then a
stuttering exhale whooshed out of his lungs in what could almost be pulled off
as a laugh, if he said the right thing next.
Unfortunately, he did not say the right thing next. Instead, he felt the
familiar pressure around his mouth indicating that another smile had slipped
past his defenses, fixating itself on his face. He held the blade up, the blood
sparkling in the sun in his peripheral vision. The next exhale came out just as
uneven as the last—only this time it couldn’t be described as anything other
than a laugh. The muscles of his arm took over, and his mind blanked out for a
moment.
“You bastard!” The words, filled with so much rage and terrific power, shocked
Izaya back into reality. The comforting weight of the knife was no longer in
his hand, and his eyes immediately focused on a splotch of crimson in front of
him—spreading across the shoulder of Shizuo’s white shirt. It took him a moment
to realize that he’d caused that escape of blood, that that was his knife’s
hilt sticking out of the monster’s skin, that he was now empty-handed before
the now incredibly angry Heiwajima Shizuo. The blond was panting with rage, his
brown eyes glowing with fire, his fists clenched into condensed outlines of
fury.
Izaya drew in a breath, inwardly cursing himself for losing himself and his
composure for that half-second it took to move the situation from bad to worse.
Shizuo slowly reached his right arm across his chest to grip the hilt of the
blade in his shoulder. Izaya watched with a frozen sort of horrified
fascination as the blond deliberately pulled the blade from his skin. The
redness spread faster down the white of his shirt, the metal of the knife slick
and shining with blood. Izaya fixated his eyes on the sharp red blade, watching
the way the color slid down the side to form little drops at the tip, which
then fell to the ground where the hungry earth sucked it up, swallowing the
thick metallic liquid without complaint.
“I-za-ya-kun,” Shizuo growled dangerously, an angry smile still slashed across
his face. Finally he let the maniacally twisted lips drop into a more
believable expression, one that matched with the glow in his eyes to show his
animalistic rage for what it truly was. Izaya found himself unable to back
away, unable to separate himself from this terrifyingly fascinating display of
pure ferocious violence.
Suddenly he jumped at the feel of a hand on his arm. Though unwilling to take
his eyes off the blond, who was boiling in his own frenzy, Izaya slid his gaze
to the side to pick up Shinra’s brown hair. “Now, now,” Shinra said lightly,
tugging at Izaya’s sleeve. “I don’t believe we’ve met—you’re Heiwajima Shizuo,
correct?” He directed his question innocently, fearlessly, as if he wasn’t
talking to the most feared man in Ikebukuro.
Shizuo’s lips twitched, as if they weren’t sure whether to frown or smile. “Who
are you?” he asked gruffly, as if not even expecting an answer.
Shinra—being Shinra, of course—did answer. “I’m Kishitani Shinra—you can call
me Shinra.” His tone was conversational, as if he either didn’t understand or
didn’t care about the weight of the situation he’d just interrupted. “You’re in
our grade, aren’t you? You’re quite well-known.” He laughed a bit, his laugh
sounding neither forced nor awkward. Izaya found himself flicking his eyes from
Shinra to Shizuo, struggling to predict the blond’s reactions before he said
anything.
Shizuo hesitated for a moment, but when Izaya made the mistake of meeting his
gaze, the anger returned to the brown eyes. “Get,” Shizuo growled, “out of the
way.” He was still glaring at Izaya as he spoke, but they all knew he was
talking to Shinra.
Shinra, for his part, let out another laugh. “Oh, Shizuo—can I call you
Shizuo?—here’s the thing. Y’see, Izaya’s kind of become what I’d like to
consider a friend. So, I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t kill him right
now, ok? At least wait until after high school, because I probably won’t need
his friendship then. Get it?” Izaya felt the overwhelming urge to roll his eyes
at his ‘friend’s’ weird words, but found himself unable to break his gaze with
the blond.
Shizuo was the one to finally break their gaze, if only to stare at Shinra.
Izaya wondered what he was thinking about—Is he surprised because Shinra talked
back to him? Is he unused to being addressed as a normal human? Is he going to
go after Shinra now?
Finally the monster spoke, drawing his words out slowly and deliberately,
grating each syllable across the back of his throat before throwing it into the
tense air between them. “Is that what you want, then? You want the flea alive?”
A terrifying light made his brown eyes glow almost as red as the blood across
his shirt. He lifted his hand in a threatening motion and Izaya fought the urge
to flinch as the blood-soaked blade was tossed onto the ground before the
raven’s feet. “Fine, then. I don’t have to kill him to send him to hell.” Izaya
felt a shiver run up his spine.
Shizuo slipped his tongue out to lick at his lip—a motion so quick that no one
but the ever-so-observant Orihara Izaya would catch. The monster twisted his
lips into that horrifying grin once more. “I can just bring hell to you,
Izaya.”
Another tingle ran up Izaya’s spine, but he found it wasn’t fear—it wasn’t fear
at all. It was excitement, it was apprehension, it was anxiety, it was a
thrilling burst of adrenaline that made the blood in his veins boil. He let his
own smile pull at his mouth. “Well, Shizu-chan,” Izaya spoke, his voice calm
and his response smooth, “No one’s telling me not to kill you.”
Shizuo let out a laugh, each explosion of breath impossibly loud from his
monstrous lungs. “As if a flea like you could kill me.”
“Because you’re a monster?”
The blond’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t call me that,” he rumbled, deep in his chest.
“Unless you want to die before graduation.”
Izaya bent down to pick up the knife that Shizuo had tossed at his feet,
lifting it and inspecting the way the shiny blood clung to the green of the
grass blades beneath. He straightened, lifting the red-coated blade like a
prize. “But you are a monster, Shizu-chan,” he murmured softly, tilting the
blade to catch on the light of the sun. He tore his eyes from the crimson to
meet Shizuo’s angry gaze.
“We’ll just have to see who kills who first, then.”
Chapter End Notes
     *lifts hands off keyboard* "What the fuck am I writing?"
     *stares at wall* "Why the fuck am I writing this?"
     *looks back at laptop screen* "Where the fuck am I going to go with
     this?"
     *contemplates life choices*
***** Chapter 5 *****
Chapter Notes
     Wow, this chapter took an eternity to write. I'm so sorry.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Izaya bit his lip thoughtfully, grinding his teeth over the soft skin as he ran
his eyes across the computer screen before him. The chatroom’s design was
something he was proud of—a sleek black background, and different colored
message boxes for each member. First messages were already popping up—then
second messages, then thirds.
He found himself absentmindedly touching his own neck with his cold fingers,
rubbing at the delicate skin there. Sometimes he could still feel someone
else’s hand there, someone that wasn’t him, gripping at his throat, cutting off
his breath. With a quick motion, Izaya wrapped his fingers around his neck,
tightening until he could just barely draw in small breaths of air through the
half-closed windpipe. It’s me, he reminded himself, twisting his fingertips
into his skin almost painfully. It’s not him doing this, it’s me.
His eyes focused on the computer screen again, where his ‘name’ was
continuously being typed out among the messages. Kanra, Kanra, Kanra, one color
chanted incessantly. With a slight frown, Izaya paged up to where the member
had first called for him.
Suddenly something outside the window caught his attention. He jerked his head
to the side just in time to see—is that a vending machine?!—flying up past the
rooftop of the buildings on the opposite street. With a breath of excitement,
Izaya leapt to his feet, making his way to the window as the hunk of warped
metal made its way back to the ground with a CRASH that Izaya could hear even
from his apartment.
It was hidden from view now, behind the buildings, but Izaya could see a few
people running out from behind, stumbling over themselves in terror as they
ran. It’s him, Izaya grinned, hearing a breathy laugh falling past his lips,
though not remembering when he’d made the decision to let it out. “But that’s
ok,” he half-whispered, his breath fogging the glass of his window, “I have the
power now…to cut you down. I’ll lop your head off—a death fitting for the
miserable monster you are!”
With another breathy giggle, Izaya pushed himself from the window, letting his
body weight drop to the side at a dangerous speed. He caught himself at the
last moment, easing his body back to his center of gravity; plopping himself
down in his chair, he used the momentum to spin a few times before focusing his
attention on his computer again. Ignoring all the messages that had appeared
while he was distracted, Izaya typed a quick half-hearted goodbye and logged
off, spending a moment or two staring at his computer’s home screen.
“I can do it,” he whispered threateningly, feeling the blood of excitement
rushing through his veins. “I can cut you down, Shizuo. I will cut you down.”
In a sudden flurry of movement, he pushed himself from the chair, letting
himself fall until his fingertips caught on the sill of the window again, where
he pulled his face to the glass. The chaos had cleared in the streets below,
and the people of Ikebukuro were going about their usual lives. “What strange
people,” Izaya mused, tapping his toe absentmindedly against the wall.
“Humanity really is…strange. Don’t you think?”
He turned around, looking around the apartment. There was no one there but
himself. He grinned. I knew that. “I was talking to Shizuo,” he explained, even
though there was no one to explain it to. He turned back to the window, his
gaze running over the building that had hidden the monster from view a few
moments ago. “You’re not a human, are you, Shizuo,” he murmured. “You’re so
low, you’re off the scale.” He tapped a fingernail against the glass. Tick.
Tick. Tick.
Izaya’s half-focused gaze down on the outside world suddenly sharpened on a
single object—a flash of blond hair in his peripheral vision. He snapped his
eyes towards it, his heart suddenly in his throat. Along the sidewalk below, a
tall blond man was walking, a petit raven-haired girl on his arm. No one that
Izaya recognized. He let out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding, and
loosened the fists he hadn’t known he’d been clenching.
“What is it with you, Shizuo?” he asked no one, knocking his forehead against
the window lightly. “Why did you feel the need to make me feel this way?”
Because he’s a monster. “Why did you have so much fun, ruining my life?”
Because he’s a monster. “Why am I so afraid of you?” Because he’s a monster.
“Why can’t you just die already?” Because he’s a monster.
Izaya took a breath, trying to push back the memories. The memory of Shizuo’s
maniacal grin. The memory of the terrifying light in those brown eyes. The
memory of that monster-like strength that had bruised Izaya’s skin for weeks
afterward. The memory of the horrible yet amazing feelings that had been
coursing through Izaya’s body. The memory of the way Izaya’s body had kept
begging for more, even as his voice was pleading for an end.
There was a sudden pain in Izaya’s arm, a sudden sharpness digging into his
skin. He glanced down, realizing that his hand had moved on its own accord to
pull the switchblade that he’d used against Shizuo from his pocket and push it
against the fabric of the sleeve that covered his forearm. With a sharp inhale,
Izaya tossed the blade away, not wanting the blood of his enemy anywhere near
his own skin.
In a sudden fit of almost-panic, Izaya yanked the sleeve up his arm—even though
it was obviously not cut through—and inspected the pale skin. There was no new
cut, no fresh, dark blood welling up on his skin. He let out a faint sigh,
pulling the sleeve down and directing a shaky glare to the still-blood-coated
blade that now sat morosely on the ground, like a mongrel who’d just been
kicked from the house.
“Fuck you,” he muttered angrily, rubbing his arm nervously. He stilled his
hand, dropping it from his arm, controlling his trembling. “Fuck,” he breathed
again, the word short enough to not betray the shakiness of the full breath.
Izaya leaned against the wall, his fingers returning to the windowsill to keep
his body from falling as his knees half-buckled. He glared out the window, the
fiery nerves under his skin causing anger to pulse through his veins. “I will
kill you, Shizuo,” Izaya hissed, the words now coming out clearly and without
hesitation. “I’ll make you pay.”
Chapter End Notes
     I've been super busy with school lately, so I'm not sure when I'll
     have time to write the next chapter. It took me forever to write this
     one, and it's incredibly short xD
     Sorry! Review anyway, I love reading your thoughts on the story!
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