Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/835558.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Glee
  Relationship:
      Kurt_Hummel/Noah_Puckerman
  Character:
      Noah_Puckerman, Kurt_Hummel
  Additional Tags:
      Cheerio_Kurt, Puck_is_a_player
  Stats:
      Published: 2013-06-09 Words: 2271
****** Honey Nut ******
by pterawaters
Summary
     Puck has had every flavor Cheerio: Regular, Honey Nut...
Notes
     Based on this_gifset by the lovely hylandbenoist on tumblr.
See the end of the work for more notes
Puck had to admit that the Cheerios' new routine was good. It was really good.
Maybe not as gymnastic as usual, but it wasn't like people could expect that
black chick from glee to do round offs and flips and shit. Though if Puck was
gay enough to be on the Cheerios, he could probably make it happen. Yeah, he
was that strong. Like a superhero. Or a god.
At least that's what Cheerios usually called him when he talked them into bed.
That thought made Puck realize that there were two new Cheerios to seduce.
Quinn was still holding out on him and Santana wasn't into anything but sexting
these days, so Puck definitely felt the need to get out there and do his thing.
The black chick was religious or something (like too many of the girls in
Lima), so Puck set his sights on Kurt.
Kurt was little baby-faced, but Puck could deal with that. And Puck could
definitely dig the way Kurt's Cheerios pants hugged his ass. Yeah, that was a
bumper he wouldn't mind pulling up to.
It wasn't like male Cheerios were a new thing to Puck. He'd been working his
way through the whole lineup since freshman year. Not that he'd had success on
every front, but Cheerios tended to attract boys who weren't straight (except
for Chad Taylor, who'd clocked Puck with a mean right hook when Puck had
started flirting with him).
When Kurt called Puck out on his attitude during glee club, Puck knew he had
the perfect in. He caught up with Kurt after school (Tanaka could kiss Puck's
ass for missing practice) and said, "Hey? Can I talk to you?"
Giving Puck a glare an then sniffing as he turned up his nose and walked away,
Kurt replied, "No."
"But it's, like, really important."
That made Kurt shake his head and keep walking. "I have issues more pressing
than whatever important things you think you need to discuss with me."
Puck let Kurt walk away for a few moments, let him feel like he'd had the last
word. And then Puck called out, "You were right!"
Kurt stopped in his track and Puck's heart leapt a little. He had the fish on
the hook, now he just had to reel that baby in. Puck jogged a little to catch
up with Kurt and put a tentative hand on his shoulder. "What you said to me in
glee club? About how I treat girls? You were right."
Instead of the approval Puck had been looking for, Kurt came back at him with
this look of suspicion. Damn. Puck must have thrown him in the dumpster one too
many times. Kurt's voice dropped lower with his cynicism. "Really?"
"Totally." Puck put on his most sincere face, the one that had gotten him out
of trouble with his ma on more than one occasion. "I mean, I guess I've kind of
been lashing out at chicks, y'know, because–"
"Because of the baby," Kurt finished for him with a sympathetic nod. He kept
his eyes on Puck while he rearranged his bag so it sat on his other shoulder.
Puck could have taken the prompt Kurt gave him. He could have run with it,
maybe gotten a little sympathy, and a friend. Puck wasn't exactly looking for a
friend though, now was he? Puck shrugged and shook his head a little. "More
like..." Puck paused and looked around, like he was afraid of being overheard.
"Like I've been dealing with this shit, like feelings shit, about people who
aren't exactly..."
"Quinn? Oh, my god! You're in love with Rachel?" Jesus H. Christ, this kid was
obtuse.
"Girls!" Puck almost shouted. He lowered his voice to a whisper. "People who
aren't girls."
The look that spread over Kurt's face was hilarious and Puck had to bite the
inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. "You're...?" Puck nodded at whatever
mental label Kurt gave him. "And you...?" He wasn't sure where Kurt was going
with that thought, but it didn't matter. Puck nodded again. "You have feelings
for Finn, don't you?"
It takes Puck a moment to get over the mental image of messing around with
Finn, mostly because it feels a little incestuous. But Puck knows all about
Kurt's unrequited crush on Finn. Everyone in glee club knows about it. And Puck
could definitely use it to his advantage. "I'm totally in love with him. God, I
feel like a girl!"
"And that's why you slept with Quinn? To get back at him for not returning your
feelings?" Kurt looked almost joyful, like he'd just discovered the meaning of
life or some shit. It was cute.
Before long, Puck talked Kurt into the back seat of Kurt's awesome ride. After
a few minutes of making out and Puck's signature tongue move, Kurt pulled back.
Flustered and cheeks red, he put a hand on Puck's chest, holding him back.
"Wait. Wait."
"What?" Puck wanted to get his mack on, maybe even talk himself into a hand
job, and he didn't appreciate Kurt holding up the works. Not like he'd ever let
that frustration show on his face, though. There was having mad seduction
skills and then there was being a rapey douchebag.
"This is going so fast! I'm afraid we're letting our hormones get the best of
us here."
"Oh, I'm totally letting them get the best of me," Puck replied with a grin,
setting a kiss on the shoulder of Kurt's Cheerios uniform. "And it's awesome."
The edges of Kurt's lips twitched up, but he didn't move back into Puck's arms.
"I always thought my first make out session would happen at the end of a date.
You know, an actual date? With dinner and a movie and maybe even flowers?"
"You want me to buy you flowers?" Puck scoffed. "Here I thought we were just
drowning our sorrows."
Kurt shrugged with one shoulder, tilting his head toward that side. "Well, yes.
I guess we were. But don't you see that we could be more than this?" Kurt
gestured to space around them and Puck felt his plan falling down around his
ears. Shit. Maybe the black chick would've been easier.
After a moment during which he tried to come up with a plan, Puck said, "I
don't know. I'm pretty hung up on Finn. I'm not sure a – what? A relationship?
I'm not sure that's a good idea. I'd just break your heart."
Kurt deflated a little, but he nodded all the same. Right where Puck wanted
him.
"But maybe I could be convinced?"
Kurt's face remained blank for a few seconds and Puck convinced himself he was
about to be kicked to the curb. But then Kurt got this almost scary look of
determination. He surged toward Puck, pushing him back against the armrest of
the backseat. "Okay."
Puck didn't get a chance to be surprised before Kurt's lips were on him, rough
and demanding. The blood rushed back into Puck's dick so quickly he felt
lightheaded. Jesus, and Kurt's hands were everywhere – on Puck's neck, his
shoulders, his waist. Christ on a cracker, even his dick! Hummel wasn't messing
around! "Oh, fuck!"
"You did say I should be convincing," Kurt said in a low, sexy voice, his hand
pressing just so on Puck's cock, through the thick material of his jeans. Puck
came in his pants like a virgin.
"Holy shit," Puck breathed when he got his voice back, shuddering at each kiss
Kurt pressed against his neck. "How did you do that?"
Kurt smirked and Puck had the sinking feeling that it was possible a gay virgin
had more game than him. It was the hottest thought that had ever crossed Puck's
mind.
Puck pulled himself up and into Kurt's space, pressing feverish kisses against
his jaw and neck. "Fuck, I want you so bad." It was probably one of the most
honest things Puck had ever said during sex. He hadn't even thought about the
words before he said them. Fuck, maybe Puck was being convinced. "Please tell
me I can get you out of these pants."
One eyebrow arched, Kurt said, "Depends on what you had in mind."
Puck's cock twitched. How was Kurt able to be so damn articulate when Puck had
both hands almost as high up on Kurt's thighs as they could go? Groaning, Puck
slipped to the floor of the car and moved one of his hands so his thumb could
trace up Kurt's cock. "I wanna blow you."
"Um," Kurt said, but when Puck looked up, Kurt was nodding vigorously. "Um,
yeah. Okay."
Puck had only gone down on a guy twice before, but he'd received more than a
few blow jobs, so he was pretty sure he knew what he was doing: man up, go for
broke, and drive the dude wild.
Puck grabbed Kurt's bright red pants by the waistband and pulled them down
slowly. Partly he went slow to ramp up the tension on Kurt's end, but also
because Puck was getting hard again already and needed to compose himself
before showtime. As he passed Kurt's hip bones, Puck expected to find the
waistband of a pair of underwear. There weren't any. "You're going commando?"
Puck asked, more than a little impressed.
Kurt shrugged. "The lines looked better without them."
Puck pulled the front of Kurt's waistband up, so it wouldn't catch on his dick,
and pulled them all the way down before he could talk himself out of it. Kurt's
dick was bigger than Puck expected and so freaking red compared to the pale
skin of his belly. At the base there were a heavy pair of balls and Kurt's hair
was present, but very neatly trimmed. The manscaping didn't surprise Puck. What
did surprise Puck was the extra skin just under the head of Kurt's dick. Puck
wrapped his hand around it. And found the skin amazingly soft. It slid easily
up and over the head of Kurt's cock and back down again. "You're not cut," Puck
blurted out as it occurred to him.
Kurt gasped and shook his head. Voice less scary-sexy and more breathless as
Puck continued to pump his hand up and down Kurt's cock, Kurt replied, "I was
born early and my parents didn't want to put any extra stress on me. Just– just
never got it done, I guess. Oh, god! Is it… is it weird?"
"Yeah," Puck replied, leaning forward to taste the head of Kurt's dick. The
skin tasted sweet, the precome tangy and bitter. "But it's good weird. I
promise."
The low moan Kurt gave when Puck sucked him in was more than a little
gratifying. The extra skin was a little different than Puck's previous
experiences, but he found he liked running his tongue around and under it. As
he took Kurt apart lick by lick and suck by suck, Puck noticed that Kurt's skin
tasted like something familiar. Besides dick, that was.
When Puck made his way down to Kurt's balls and lightly sucked on one, then the
other, Puck figured out what he'd been tasting. "Honey!"
"No," Kurt whined, pulling on Puck's head. "Now is not the time for terms of
endearment. I'm so close, Noah!"
Not one to leave his bed partners in the lurch, Puck got back to work. He
planted a hand each on Kurt's upper thighs and worked his mouth down as far as
he could go. He swallowed around the head of Kurt's cock, the foreskin pressing
on the back of his tongue, and Kurt came. He groaned loud and low, ending with
a breathy, "Oh, god," as Puck pulled off and let Kurt finish coming on his
tongue.
Puck was still hard, but he felt satisfied enough to let it be, and instead
took a few final breaths of Kurt's honey-scented crotch. Then a thought
occurred to Puck and he couldn't help but pull back with a giddy chuckle.
"Noah, if you're laughing at my sex noises, no one will ever find your body."
"No," Puck said, pulling himself up onto the seat next to Kurt and giving him a
kiss. "It's just... you're still wearing your Cheerios uniform and your nuts
taste like honey. It's funny,"
Frowning, Kurt asked, "That's what you meant during? You tasted my skin cream?"
"Yes I did." Puck nuzzled his nose against Kurt's neck and gave it a lick.
"Your neck doesn't taste like honey."
Pushing Puck away, Kurt grabbed his pants from around his shins and pulled them
up. "That's because the honey cream is just for very sensitive skin. Now if
you're done laughing about my hygiene regimen, I'd like to get on with my day
now, Puck."
Puck didn't like it when he was still around to witness the moment when people
regretted having sex with him, especially not people who were awesome lays,
like Kurt. "Hey, don't be like that. I liked your honey-flavored junk. A lot,
if you hadn't noticed. I wouldn't mind getting up close and personal with it
again. My little Honey Nut Cheerio."
Kurt laughed like he couldn't help himself and nodded as he met Puck's eyes.
"Next time – if there is a next time – you will buy me flowers and we will go
out to dinner. Got it?"
"Got it," Puck replied, giving Kurt one last, slow kiss to remember him by. As
he was climbing out of the far backseat of Kurt's car, Puck called out over his
shoulder, "Catch ya later, Honey Nut!"
Kurt's parting scoff of displeasure was music to Puck's ears.
End Notes
     You can also find me on tumblr, if you'd like.
Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed
their work!