Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/277620.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      F/M
  Fandom:
      Harry_Potter_-_Fandom
  Relationship:
      Draco_Malfoy/Pansy_Parkinson
  Character:
      Draco_Malfoy, Pansy_Parkinson
  Additional Tags:
      Draco_Malfoy_-_character, Pansy_Parkinson_-_Character, Teenagers, Teen
      Sex, Loss_of_Virginity, Drama, Hogwarts, Hogwarts_Era, Desperation,
      Worry, Friendship, Friends_to_Lovers, Community:_samhain_smut
  Stats:
      Published: 2011-11-15 Words: 3493
****** Heart's Ease ******
by Musyc
Summary
     Draco is hurting and alone on his task; Pansy knows she can bring him
     some comfort. If he'll only let her.
He rarely slept in the dormitory anymore. Pansy drew back into the shadows, the
hood of her cloak over her head and hiding her face as Draco passed the alcove.
She clutched the cloak beneath her chin, listening to the harsh rasp of his
breathing, the drag of his tired footsteps. It had taken her weeks to learn
where he went at night when he didn't come back to the dorms. Weeks more to
make her decision. But as the shadows around his eyes grew deeper and his skin
turned thin and brittle, her heart stuttered and trembled and she made her
choice.
A door creaked shut and Pansy stepped out of the alcove. She followed the stone
corridor and stopped in front of the expanse of blank wall. A quick flick of
her wand showed a sparkle of blue light on the floor, the size and shape of
Draco's boots. Her charm had worked. She closed her eyes and concentrated,
remembering the details that she had wormed out of Greg with the application of
both Veritaserum and a plate of iced cakes.
Walk back and forth, repeat three times, while thinking hard of what is needed.
Pansy pressed her fingers to the pulse in her throat, counting the beats. At
thirty, she focused her thoughts. I need to be with Draco. I need to talk to
Draco. I need to comfort Draco. She paced in front of the wall, each thought
echoing in her mind, the rhythm of the words matching her footsteps. After her
third pass, she stopped and faced the wall--
No. Not the wall. The wall had disappeared, just as Greg had told her it would.
Now she stood in front of a door. A small oaken door with a dragon-shaped
latch. Pansy let out her breath in a moan of relief, and she pushed the door
open before it could disappear. Inside the room, she blinked as her eyes
adjusted to the dim light. She set her hand over her heart, willing the wild
beats to calm. She could feel them pounding against her palm, and she was
afraid the thuds would be audible in the quiet, dark room.
Afraid Draco would hear her. The anxiety he'd been displaying for the past few
months could lead him to attack what he thought was a threat before realizing
it was her, coming to help him, to talk to him. She'd seen him lash out at
Blaise, throw hexes at Vince and Greg for no reason she could determine.
He'd not turned his anger on her, but then he'd barely spoken to her since the
school year had started. She believed that somewhere in his mind he thought he
was protecting her, keeping her away from the stresses and dangers he was
facing, but in the process he'd left himself alone. Blaise and Theo whispered
about the nightmares Draco had suffered, about yelling and thrashing in the
middle of the night, the entire dorm waking, cowering behind the curtains of
their beds until Draco's screams subsided into pained, quiet whimpers.
Pansy knew the rumors and talk. She knew of Draco's father imprisoned in
Azkaban, his mother imprisoned in her home. She knew the puffed-up bragging
Draco had made on the train, and she knew the scared truth behind it. Draco had
been given a task, and she knew by the grey tinge to his skin and the dark
hollows beneath his eyes that he was failing at it. He needed help. He needed
support.
He needed her.
If he would only ask. But if he wouldn't ask, she'd offer regardless. She cared
about him too much to let him spend one more day alone.
Pansy slipped out of the low black brogues she wore and stretched her toes, the
stone floor cold even through her thick white socks. She tugged the tops up
over her knees and smoothed down her skirt, but stopped herself before she
could fidget further with adjustments to her clothing. She had to find Draco,
and she couldn't waste time.
Moving quietly, she followed a narrow path between tall stacks of broken chairs
and mismatched fabrics. Dust covered most things where the spider webs didn't,
but here and there in the grey dust on the floor were foot prints, the marks of
Draco's boots. She held her eyes wide to let in all the light possible and kept
to the faint trail. As she made her way deeper into the room, her heart pounded
loud against her ears, but another sound was louder.
"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck this thing!" Something flew overhead and smacked into a wall
nearby. Pansy jumped, biting her tongue as her teeth clattered. She froze, her
heart beating even faster, as Draco's voice rose over the stacks of discarded
rubbish. "Fuck this, fuck all of it." His voice broke and softened, as if he
were afraid to say the next words. "And fuck the Dark Lord."
Pansy shivered in sympathy. Draco's swearing faded into broken sniffs and
little, pained sobs. Pansy covered her mouth, her heart breaking for him. He'd
bragged of this task, but the pride she'd felt for him then was overcome by
worry and fear now. What this was doing to him -- it was too much. Too much for
anyone to bear alone.
She took a step forward and her knee collided with the arm of a broken chair.
The impact rattled the entire stack, sending a lantern tumbling from the top to
crash into the stone floor, its glass windows shattered.
"What the--" Draco said, and Pansy ducked from the flare of orange sparks that
shot down the narrow path towards her. "Who's there?" Draco shouted. Another
burst of sparks came arrowing towards Pansy. "Who's there?"
"It's me, Draco," she shouted, crouched on the stone floor with her wand
clenched tight in her fist, her palm sweating around the wood. "Draco, it's
only me! Stop casting!"
"Pansy?" Draco swore again. Pansy heard him approaching, his boot heels ringing
on the floor, and she flinched. He only hit his steps that hard when he was
angry, and the twist of his face as he came into view was angry indeed. "The
fuck are you doing here?" he demanded. "How the hell did you get in? I warded--
"
His expression shifted, eyes going wide, the light of fear in his face. He
snapped his head around to stare down the path she'd taken. "I warded the
door."
There was a tremble in his voice, a lilt of apprehension, and Pansy scrambled
to her feet. "Against enemies," she said, shoving her wand into her pocket so
she could reach for him with both hands. "Against enemies, against people who
would want to stop you. I'm not here to stop you, Draco. I want-- I want to
help you."
He looked at her, and his face slowly settled into a blank mask that tore at
her heart. "I don't need your help," he said in a flat voice as cold as the
frost that rimed the castle windows every morning. "I don't want your help. Go
on, Pansy." He gestured with his wand back toward the door. "Get out of here.
Leave me alone. I have work to do."
He turned away from her. "No!" she cried. She jumped forward and grabbed his
arm, clinging to the sleeve. The fabric pulled tight against his forearm, and
for a moment she could see a sinuous black shape beneath it. Draco hissed and
jerked his arm free of her grasp.
Pansy grabbed at him again, his elbow and wrist caught in her hands, her nails
digging into him. "No," she insisted. She looked up into his eyes. The dark
circles were almost black, the muscles around them held tense. Deep lines
furrowed his brow and formed creases on either side of his frowning lips.
Before she could stop herself, she reached up to push his fringe back. "Let me
help," she whispered.
For just a second, he leaned his head into her hand, then he straightened, his
face hardening. "I have to do this alone. You can't help. No one can help. Just
go, Pansy. I have too much to do and you can't be involved."
Despite his harsh tone, he didn't retreat from her or push her away. Pansy
gathered up her courage and twined her arms around his neck. She laid her head
on his chest, listening to the steady thud of his heart. "Let me help," she
pleaded. "Draco, you don't need to be alone. Take a rest, talk to me. Let me
help."
Draco remained still for long enough that she felt tears of rejection pricking
at her eyes, but before they could spill, his hands slipped around her waist.
"Sysy," he murmured, her childhood nickname affectionate and warm in his voice.
"You can't help. Not with this. Go back to the dorms. I'll see you at
breakfast. Maybe we can talk a walk around the courtyard together, or go into
Hogsmeade. Get some spiced cider and start holiday shopping. Something nice,
all right? I promise. Just not now. I don't have time now."
He protested, but his arms were tight around her, his head bent until his chin
rubbed her hair. Pansy ran her fingers over his nape and lifted her head to
kiss his jaw. She knew he meant his promise but she also knew he wouldn't keep
it. Whatever this task was, it took over all his thoughts and time. She had him
there now, she had his attention now, and she wasn't going to let go of it. Of
him.
She drew his head down and kissed him. Draco hissed in surprise and Pansy
caught the sound in her mouth. She flicked her tongue against the seam of his
lips. Draco's hands tensed on her waist and he hauled her close, pinning her to
his chest. He made a small, whimpering sound and opened his mouth. His tongue
drew across hers, explored her mouth, retreated and coaxed her to follow.
Pansy's nipples tightened as Draco's hands spread across her back and he took
full control of their kiss.
Pansy couldn't breathe, crushed against Draco as if holding her kept his heart
beating. She didn't care. She reveled in it. This hadn't been part of her plans
when she'd sneaked out of the dorms and waited for him, but if it was what he
needed, she would give it to him. Anything to take that fear out of his eyes
and the weight off his shoulders. Just for a little while.
His fingers slid down her back and cupped her arse. Pansy sucked in a breath
and pressed closer to him, realizing that she could feel him, feel his cock
hard against her stomach. It wasn't the first time. Dancing close at the Yule
Ball, sitting on his lap at the Broomsticks, she'd felt it before, but not for
a long while. Not since months before he'd taken on this task. She clung to
him, rocked against him, and Draco snapped his head up with a muffled swearing.
"Pansy," he said, his voice rough. "You need to go." He moved his hands to her
waist and took a step back.
No, Pansy thought, desperate not to lose this chance. She clutched at his hair
with one hand and dragged the other down his chest. The square buckle of his
belt left a chill on her palm as she pushed her fingers against his zip and the
half-hard erection beneath it. Draco's eyelids fluttered and his mouth dropped
open. He made a soft grunt and tried again to push her back. Pansy curled her
fingers, groping at him, and shoved up on her toes to kiss the wild pulse in
his throat.
"Let me help you," she muttered into his neck. She licked his skin, tasting
sweat and dust and him. "Let me, Draco. Anything you need, anything you want.
It's yours." She tensed her fingers and he ground into her hand, his cheeks
turning bright pink and his eyes going dark.
He looked at her, searched her eyes, and swallowed hard. "You're sure?"
She took a deep breath and nodded. Draco gave a shaky exhale and grabbed her
hand. He pulled her deeper into the room, past broken tables and piles of moldy
books, to a cleared space. A tall cabinet stood at one side, its doors open,
tools scattered on a canvas tarp in front of it. Beside the cabinet, under a
slitted window that let in the silver light of the hunter's moon, was a narrow
bed. A pile of robes lay at one end for a pillow.
Draco released Pansy's hand and went to close the cabinet. While his back was
to her, Pansy sat on the edge of the bed and undid the buttons of her blouse.
She slipped it off as Draco turned around.
The sound he made hit her like a curse. It burned through her, making her heart
race and her body clench. She stretched out on the narrow bed, her hands across
her stomach. A shadow fell over her face as Draco neared the bed. He touched
her cheek and she could feel his fingers trembling as they traced down her
throat and over her clavicle. He drew one along the top of her bra cups. Pansy
arched her back to push her breasts against his hand. The look in his eyes had
her breathing faster and her knickers damp. He wasn't thinking about the Dark
Lord or his task now. All his attention was for her.
Draco stroked the skin between her breasts, around her navel, above the ribbed
cuffs of her socks. Pansy shifted, spreading her knees to encourage his touch
and keep his focus. She could hear his breathing, as heavy as if he'd been at
Quidditch training, but still all he did was stand beside her and touch her.
A gust of wind rattled the glass in the window, brittle leaves thrown against
it. Draco looked up, away from Pansy, and his head turned toward the cabinet as
soon as his focus was broken. Pansy's heart thudded. No. She reached up, laid
her hand over his groin, fumbled at his belt. Draco gasped and stared down at
her, the cabinet forgotten.
Desperate to keep his focus, to give him something, anything that wasn't his
task or his worries, Pansy scrabbled to unbuckle his belt and open his
trousers. She got his zip down and shoved her hand inside. Soft, warm cotton
met her fingers and she felt around the shape of his cock. Draco stood still,
only his chest moving as he breathed hard. Pansy found a small damp spot on his
pants, with a round bulge beneath it, and she stroked her thumb over it.
Draco jerked and swore deep in his throat, then shoved her hand away. Pansy
pushed onto her elbows, ready to make her offer again before he told her once
more to leave, but he didn't speak. Didn't step back.
He kicked his boots off, shoved his trousers and pants to the floor. His cock
rose up between the crumpled tails of his shirt. Pansy stared at it, her mouth
open and dry, her cunt wet and throbbing. Long and thin like the rest of him,
it had a dark tip poking out of the enclosing foreskin. She knew male anatomy
from books and gossip sessions in the dorms, but she'd never seen for herself.
She liked it, she decided. The long shaft, the thick patch of blond hair, the
crinkled pouch beneath -- it was fascinating.
She reached for him and Draco gripped her hand as she circled his cock. He
pressed her fingers to him, pumped his hips and thrust into the channel formed
by her hand. He controlled her touch, guided her to ease his foreskin back and
to stroke his length. Small drops of a sticky fluid beaded at the tip. Pansy
licked her lips and the unconscious action pulled a deep groan from Draco.
He bent over her and shoved his hands under her skirt. Pansy lifted her hips to
make it easier for him to pull her knickers off. She flipped her skirt up to
her waist, leaving her exposed, showing him the dark curls between her thighs.
She pressed one leg against the wall and dropped the other over the side of the
bed to make space for him.
Draco made a strangled, animalistic sound and clambered onto the bed. He knelt
between her legs, hand loose and pumping on his cock. "Pansy, I--"
She shushed him. She reached up and gripped his shoulders, drew him down to lay
atop her. He made a warm and comforting weight on her body. The buttons of his
shirt dug into her stomach but she barely noticed, too lost in the sensation of
his cock rubbing against her folds. Draco groaned and kissed her, his fingers
probing her cunt.
He spread her open and Pansy clung to his shoulders as the tip of his cock
prodded her. She felt his hand moving, felt him adjusting position, then he
pushed into her. Pansy yelped, her eyes flying open in surprise at the quick,
pinching pain. Draco froze. He lifted his head and stared at her, his mouth
open. "Shit," he said, his voice taut and his face red. "Shit, Pansy. I didn't-
- I forgot you were--"
"Not anymore," she said, her brows knotted against the ache of her body
stretching to accept him. She shoved her hand beneath his shirt and dug at his
spine. "Don't you dare stop now, Draco Malfoy."
He held his position until she grumbled in protest and bucked her hips. Draco
groaned and pushed deeper into her. Her muscles burned but she was too absorbed
in the feel of Draco on her, in her, to care about the slight pain. She
caressed his back, already damp with sweat. Draco drew out of her, pushed in,
drew out.
Pansy watched his face as he moved, his bollocks swaying against her with each
thrust. The tensions and worry had eased out of his expression. His eyes were
narrowed, dark as slate beneath the slitted lids, and his high forehead and
pointed nose were dappled with beads of sweat. Each time he slid into her, he
gave a small, breathy grunt, an "unh, uh" of effort.
He picked up speed, clinging to the robes beneath her head. His face tightened
again, but it was a new tension. It was a look that made her blood hot and her
body clench around his cock. Draco groaned, losing his rhythm for a moment,
then he found it again and moved even faster, his body slapping against hers.
Pansy held on to his waist, urging him on with quiet whispers, encouraging him
to take what she'd freely given. She lifted her leg and wrapped it around his
thighs to pull him into her as deep as he could move. Draco groaned, his entire
body stiffening. He buried his face against her neck. "P-Pansy. I'm gonna-
- Gonna. Fuckgonnacome." The steady rhythm of his thrusts faltered and broke.
He clutched at her, his hips moving erratic and wild as he let out a deep and
guttural moan.
Pansy held him as he trembled, as he collapsed atop her and panted for breath.
She stroked his damp hair and crooned to him, feeling the tension leave his
body. When he lifted his head, she smiled. His face was calm, his eyes languid
and soft. Tentatively, he returned her smile and pressed a gentle kiss to the
corner of her mouth. "Should have warned me, Sysy," he murmured. "I'd have--"
"No," she said, cupping his cheek. "You wouldn't have let me at all. I wanted
to, Draco. To give you something no one else could ever have. Could ever take.
No expectation, no demands." Too many people demanded too much of him as it
was, ordered him and commanded him. Not her.
He closed his eyes and shivered, then pulled out of her. Pansy bit her lip as
her stretched muscles fluttered with remnants of pain. Draco rolled to her side
against the stone wall and settled his hand over her stomach. Pansy watched him
relax, drifting toward sleep. "Stay," he whispered, his fingers stroking across
her belly when she shifted to ease the ache in her hips. He opened one eye and
closed it again with a slow sigh. "Stay with me, Pansy?"
She touched his heart and curled onto her side, letting him pull her close to
his chest and hold her hand between them. She hurt, her thighs felt sticky, and
she expected he'd throw her out once he woke and needed to continue his
wretched task, but for now, she stayed. If he wouldn't ask for help, he'd still
asked her for this, and it was his. She was his.
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