Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/788949. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Choose_Not_To_Use_Archive_Warnings, Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Major Character_Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage Category: M/M, Multi Fandom: InuYasha_-_A_Feudal_Fairy_Tale Relationship: InuYasha/Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha/Kouga/Sesshoumaru, InuYasha/Kouga Character: InuYasha_(InuYasha), Sesshoumaru_(InuYasha), Izayoi_(InuYasha), Kouga_ (InuYasha), Shippou_(InuYasha), Higurashi_Kagome Additional Tags: Mpreg Stats: Published: 2013-05-08 Updated: 2015-05-29 Chapters: 19/? Words: 44035 ****** Frozen ****** by Deityofdeath Summary InuYasha's life story told through his eyes. Contains mpreg and non- con. ***** You only see what your eyes want to see ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 1: You only see what your eyes want to see   I can’t say much about my mothers life or how she lived it before she met my father and birthed him a son; me. I wasn’t much older than five when I began to hear the harshly whispered words of servants and maids in my home which went no further than the small quarters in a palace where I never saw the outside which lay hidden behind solid white washed walls. I was a bastard and not just any bastard…no I was the bastard son of a fearsome Youkai known as Inu No Taisho. I was a double taboo, a bastard and a hanyou. Hanyou…a word my mother disliked and seemed to anger her if it was uttered in her presence. My mother’s life and my own was given thanks to my father’s death. I was told my mother had been given sanctuary in a monastery until relatives let her stay with them. She carried the title of princess whether or not she had bore a bastard hanyou. My birth had brought her down in society but she never acted as though it bothered her. We played in my small world and talked of many things. As I grew older she grew weak. She had trouble breathing and was prone to coughing fits. I watched over her like she had me and as I watched her grow into something frailer than cherry blossoms in the wind I worried for us. Her family seemed cold and gave little in the way of support. Eventually my mother was bedridden. Her condition worsened and I watched as she deteriorated into almost nothing. On her death bed she sadly smiled up at me and told me to live a good life. I felt my heart break at her last breath and her eyes closed for the last time. I sobbed for a time and then my life changed. The doors were thrown open and my mother’s body was taken away. I was grabbed by guards and taken from my small world. I watched as the bitter and delighted faces around me passed with the walls of the inner building I had never been allowed to enter and then the slamming of doors was heard and I saw the bright sunlit court yard. The sound of creaking wood and metal was loud in the silence that surrounded me and then I was air born if only for a moment before I landed on my bottom. Guards came out bearing swords and pikes and I stood shakily on my bare feet as they shouted for me to be gone and struck at me with their weapons and booted feet. I stood and ran until I came to the edge of the woods that edged the small township where my former home had been. I sat down and winced. My bare feet were bloody from scratches and blisters alike. I sniffled one last time declaring that I would no longer cry, that I would be strong like my mother had been all these years and grow up strong like her and my hated demon father. I would prove them all wrong and make my way in this prejudiced world! I wandered the woods, making sure not to go too far knowing that my mother’s body would soon be cremated and that they would bury her ashes. I was betting the family plot would be too good for her so I was wondering just where they would bury her. I located a large tree with its inside rotted and half dug into, I proceeded to dig further until I was able to fit my body inside. I pulled my fire rat kimono tighter around me and closed my eyes. My sensitive ears caught every sound in the woods that surrounded me; the many animal dwellers, the cool breeze that rustled the leaves and the sounds of the termites and other beetles that continuously chewed and crawled through the decaying tree. The sounds eventually faded out and with them the darkness that was an exhausted sleep claimed me. I awoke the next morning to a growling stomach so I left my cozy tree and went in search of food. I located a few berries here and there and a source of fresh water. In the water I discovered fish of various shapes and sizes. Try as I might they seemed to evade capture. I devoured my berries and drank until my stomach felt full. I did this for two more days until the sounds of brass clanging and murmuring filled the woods. I followed the sounds and came to a lush field of wildflowers where a group of monks and priests stood over a newly erected carved grave stone. From where I stood I could barely make out the writing on it. I had barely begun to learn to read and write but I knew a bit. I watched and waited as the priests blessed the land and placed an urn in the ground by the stone; cover it with dirt and then a few heavy flat stones before pouring some liquid on the grave and chanting once again. I watched as they finished and one by one the priests and monks left followed by the familiar faces of those who my mother had called family. I had been right. They would not allow my mothers remains to be buried with those of the family. I waited a few moments more before crawling out of my dimly lit hiding place among a few shady trees and made my way over to the lonely gravestone. I stood in front of it starring at the all too familiar kanji that had been taught to me over and over. My mother had taught me to write using my name, writing it out over and over again; pointing to each hiragana symbol as she did so and at my request she wrote her own name which I read aloud and she pointed out each symbol as she read it with me. My joy and that soft pride filled smile made me want to try harder. She had even gone as far as teaching me the a few kanji and her pride seemed to grow even more so as I read aloud and pointed to words I knew in her collection of books or when I watched her compose letters. I had seen her calligraphy and had asked about the beautiful symbols and it was then that she had painted my name and hers in kanji, the same kanji that now adorned the grave stone, not nearly as beautiful as her own style. I traced her name and stared at her plain unadorned grave before running off into the nearby wildflower fields. I grabbed handfuls of flowers of all colors and ran back to her grave stone leaving them there before running off again and grabbing another handful. I did this until my hands had blisters and her grave stone became a colorful beacon in the dull landscape. I wanted there to be no question that she had been loved and thought of. Once I had accomplished this I took one last look at her resting place and whispered a goodbye with the memory of her smile plastered in my mind. It was then that I left, not looking back. I traveled and as I did so I learned many lessons. Walk quietly, always avoiding leaves and sticks; they always alerted others to your presence, human and demon alike and neither were welcome most of the time. With humans it was usually cruel words and actions. Usually screaming and running or disdainful words but more often than not followed by the throwing of mud and rocks or worse, once or twice I had been chased and beaten with fists, switches and threatened with swords. Those who followed the faith of exercising demons also were a danger with their talismans and threats of purging and purifying. Demons were usually a bigger threat…I had become a thing of amusement a few times. Something that was chased and beaten if caught. That was a horrible experience but preferred over the threat of being eaten or assimilated by the eviler and stronger demons. I was often told I would be nothing more than a snack and that I was even unfit for that due to my short stature and scrawny body. I lived in fear and hate and trusted no one. My adolescence was spent in fear. I got better at hiding and learned that the trees were perfect hiding places from lesser demons who were too dumb to look up and if they had intelligence they also needed agility and speed in order to catch as I became better at leaping through the branches, perfecting my leaps and bounds from branch to branch. As my body grew in height I had grown accustomed to sleeping in the many boughs and branches of the trees in the territories I often traveled. I still had to contend with my human nights and found them a problem. I was weak and vulnerable to all. Humans were cruel to all, it didn’t matter if I was a child they still were cruel. I would go in search of quiet places to hide and wait out my transformation back into my hanyou body. Shrines were good places to hide because most demons avoided them if at all possible, sometimes even the stronger chose to avoid them. I could sense energies around them; even the older or abandoned ones but never had I felt unease. They became a place of rest and respite for me. It was my fiftieth year and this year my birthday fell on the same night as my human night. I felt compelled to hide and yet the sounds and smells of the local village lured me from my hiding place beneath the local temples porch. I had managed to wander into the town without incident and once there found it filled with the many happy towns people in the midst of celebration. I didn’t care enough to find out what they were celebrating I was just glad to see others who for once didn’t feel the need to attack or criticize me. As I walked by fires with meats and rice cooking over the red flames I was handed pieces here and there by kind women with bright smiles. I devoured my meal of handouts quickly enough and continued touring the jovial place that I would then avoid for the duration of my stay. I had found playmates in the children whose parents had drunkenly allowed them to stay up in celebration. The smell of alcohol permeated the air along with the smell of clean spring air and the scent of ready to bloom blossoms. As the night was coming to an end I wandered quietly away from the dying fires and was making my way to the outskirts of the village when I heard the sounds of drunken laughter behind me. I turned to see not one but three men; if one could call them that. They couldn’t be older than sixteen summers. “Where are you going pretty one,” asked one with small dark eyes that were framed by a handsome enough face that was illuminated by the flames of the lantern he held in his hand. “Are you a spirit fleeing before blessing the town and us on such an auspicious night,” asked the tallest of the group who was muscular sun darkened skin and playful eyes with a smile to match. The third; a tall skinny child-like man with freckles dusting his face stepped away from the other two and circled me and as he did so I felt dread in the pit of my stomach, threatening to bring up the first good meal I had enjoyed in months. Before I could respond arms grabbed me around the middle while another set grabbed at my legs. I struggled as I felt my hakama being removed and hands roamed my body. A set of hands held my small hands in one of their own while the other slid over my mouth to silence my cries; current and future. I was soon divested of all my clothing, my nude body exposed to the elements and the cruel hands of my tormentors. I was lowered to the ground, my head and chest brought against the big ones folded legs. He moved my head so that I had to look into his eyes as another set of hands pushed my naked thighs apart and roughly and clumsily touched, prodded and poked my most intimate of places. My eyes grew hot with embarrassment and fear and then pain as dry fingers entered me for the first time. I tried to inch away from the prying digits but to no avail. The fingers vanished and were replaced with something hotter and much bigger. It forced its way in; causing a scream to die against the bigger mans hand against my mouth. Hot tears came unbidden down my cheeks as the man drunkenly found his rhythm in my abused and bleeding body. He jerked and I felt him spasm deep inside me leaving behind a warm oozing trail as he patted my thighs and pulled out. The cold air was welcome on my open wounds, taking just a bit of the sting away but not for long as another set of legs pushed themselves between my trembling thighs. There were no fingers this time, just the pain as I was once again entered roughly. The second whom I couldn’t see with my head position slammed roughly into my body and I found my mouth uncovered allowing my choking sobs and now soft cries of pain free to escape through my cut lips. This man had gone longer but he ended his rut just like the first; shuddering on top of my small body and then pulling out. At this point I felt nothing below the waist other than the throbbing almost stabbing pain; I could no longer feel the fluids escaping my abused opening. The large hands left my body and my head was lowered to the ground momentarily and then I was flipped onto my stomach before rough hands pried my thighs open and I felt something larger than the first two enter me. I tried to find the strength to crawl away but all I could manage was to scrape my human fingernails on the ground and cry out softly, my throat scratchy and torn. He rutted atop me like the wild dogs in towns often did but thankfully he didn’t tie himself to me when he found his completion inside me. He patted my bottom and pulled out. I heard him stand and watched as the light faded in time with the dying sound of footsteps. They had had their fun and then left me battered and naked on the floor of the forest entrance. I lay there in silence, wondering if something would come along and devour me; knowing that there was nothing I would be able to do in my current condition. Nothing came and soon the night vanished with the morning light from the sun and I felt my body change as it had every new morning after my human night. My body healed as much as it could and even as I pulled myself up and stood, finding my clothing and pulling it on I knew that I had once again survived and that I would live through this and be better for it. To Be Continued…. This story has been bugging me for a while now so I had to start writing it. I haven’t stopped writing my other fics I’ve just lost my muse for them momentarily. Just to reassure everyone, I have at least 3-5 pages for my other stories I just need to finish them. Kat ***** How can life be what you want it to be ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 2: How can life be what you want it to be   It took a month for me to fully recover from my “attack” and as I did so I tried to avoid villages altogether but the problem with avoiding villages and humans themselves is that it leaves me with very few options in travel and sleeping. The woods and forests were filled with other youkai who would attack if they even thought they could overtake me. Each day was a battle and on most days I won. The ones where I lost I won in another way…each battle gave me knowledge and strength. I gained more and more until only the larger, eviler and more powerful actually posed a threat. As I traveled I became better at catching fish in the streams and lakes I happened upon and most small game was a cinch. The larger game such as deer took a bit more skill and better timing. I had only managed to bring one down once or twice and both times the deer had been injured by man or were elderly making them easy targets. My goal was to gain enough strength to bring down a warthog and perhaps a bear. A month turned into two and I chose to stay and travel along a small stream since as of late my thirst was almost unquenchable and with thirst I also seemed extremely fatigued and some of the safest and best hideaways could be found around water, it also covered my scent should I have need of a quick escape. I had learned to swim at my mother’s behest and I was glad of it now. As time came and went and my knowledge of survival grew so oddly enough did my body. I had gained spindly long legs which grew in time with my arms. I felt awkward in my body during this change but I also felt bewildered at my growing midsection the most. I wasn’t starving but I definitely wasn’t gorging myself so why had I developed a noticeable bump. It wasn’t flabby nor was it extremely hard. I shrugged it off as a side effect of my developing body until it grew to affect my balance and that was when I decided to look for some answers and the only place I could think to find them was in a human village. In most aspects I was more human than demon so perhaps this was a human illness that could be fixed with medication or if I was lucky it would be something I would simply grow out of. On my human night my change happened and my claws vanished along with my puppy ears leaving ebony locks in place of my former pale locks, brown eyes in place of gold and human ears where they belonged instead of my more useful ones. The bump remained. I drew my firerat robe around my body and made my way into the human village. I was unsure as to whether I should approach the healer and beg their opinion, pretending to be a runaway or a parentless waif thanks to feuding lords. As I wandered through nighttime crowds; mostly drunkards and “women of the night” as my mother had called them, I came upon the sound of screams and moans of pain. I followed it coming upon the doorway to a humble abode. Not wanting to be seen I made my way to the side window and climbed atop a tree stump that happened to be beside the window and peered in. A scarcely clad woman with a bulging stomach knelt over thick blankets, her face red and sweat covered as she gasped for breath before screaming and moaning in pain once again. “Come Hiyori, you are close. I can see the babes head,” called a middle-aged woman with her hair tied tightly in a bun. She sat on a short stool in-between the woman’s spread legs. I watched as she pushed and time dragged on. No one had caught me watching and watch I did. I watched as the woman finally produced the head and then the body of a wailing newborn, causing her once bloated belly to deflate. Not nearly flat enough for her to be skinny but no longer as oddly noticeable before she had birthed the shrilly crying infant. The woman with the bun handed her the child and she held it tightly against her body grinning widely. I was so entranced by the woman and her new infant as it now nursed at her chest that I hadn’t realized the woman with the bun was no longer present until a hand landed on my shoulder causing me to gasp and almost fall. The woman stopped my fall and turned me to face her. “It is not kind to invade such a private moment little one,” she scolded. I felt my cheeks heat and knew I was blushing as I struggled to find words, “I didn’t mean to. I…I just wanted to know…” “Know what little one,” she asked with an arched brow. It hadn’t been intentional on my part but automatic as I placed my hands on my midsection revealing a slight rounding. It was her gasp that made me realize my error. I felt fear and made to run past her but for a lady of her age she was quick and before I could take two steps she had me in her arms and she once again turned me to face her. “How is it one so young is in this position,” she asked sadly. “Am I”, I asked uncertainly, “Is there one of those inside here”, I asked as my arms came to wrap protectively around my middle again. “We can find out,” she stated. I nodded and she stood letting go of one of my hands and leading me into the new mothers’ home. “I will return in a moment Hiyori”, she grinned at a man who now sat beside the lady and new born, “Congratulations on your son Ichiro.” With that she grabbed a lantern with her free hand and led me to the nearby tool shed. She opened the door and pulled me in before shutting the door behind us. She sat the lantern down and knelt in front of me. “I’m going to gently squeeze and prod your stomach,” she warned and I nodded acknowledging her. Her hands were large and warm as they carefully prodded and poked at my belly. “So little one, when was the deed done,” she asked softly. “The deed,” I asked back at her. Her eyes looked surprised and she closed them momentarily as she rephrased her question, “How long has it been since…the man entered you?” “There were three…” I admitted softly at the memory I fought to forget returned once more, “About…four new moons ago.” She nodded and removed her hands, “You should be due sometime in the winter.” She stood and I fidgeted and then dug into my pockets pulling out some berries and nuts I had gathered earlier in the day and held them out to her. “What’s this now,” she asked bewildered. “I have no money and I can’t stay in the village, otherwise I’d do chores for you but I have these.” She knelt again and rolled my hands up so I wouldn’t drop their contents, “I need no payment little one. Why can’t you stay?” I went to the door and opened it staring out at the night sky which was beginning to lighten. I smiled at her and then took off running. I could hear her shout for me to wait but I couldn’t stop or let her catch up for fear of what she would do if she found out I was a hanyou and not the small girl she thought me to be. I made it to the edge of the fields and then woods as light broke across the sky and with it I felt the growth of my ears, fangs and claws. I didn’t bother looking back; I didn’t want to see if she were still there because I didn’t want to remember her with a look of hate or disgust upon her kind face. After that day I decided to avoid humans. I was carrying and the odds were that I would deliver a child like me; a child hated by humans and demons; a child between worlds. I traveled until I came to a cavern on the side of a high hillside and it was there that I decided I would birth my pup. I cleaned it out, removing animal waste and other debris, making sure no harmful creatures resided in it and then I began the arduous task of collecting leaves, moss and sticks. I stored the sticks in the back of the cave so I would have firewood as it got colder and laid the leaves on the soft dirt of the cave floor and placed the soft moss atop it. As I came across human camps I stole dried rations, pots and kettles and the occasional blanket or other cloth that happened to be left out. My cave became home and as the heat of summer became the chill of Fall I felt movement for the first time. The being inside went from an occasional movement to a constant reminder as the sixth new moon came and went. I had decided that I would hunt small game in the hopes of gathering the fur pelts to help keep the pup warm when it was born. It was after my seventh new moon when I had made the mistake of stumbling across another demons prey. I was cold and my feet and back were aching, my kicking pup reminding me of its discomfort as well when I saw the deer with its broken leg. I crouched and jumped aiming for its neck with my claws free and ready to tear into its thin blood filled neck when a tall bulky demon came out of no where pouncing on the deer easily snapping its neck one handed. I saw this and landed short of the kill. I was slow in reacting and as soon as the large bear demon saw me he grinned and came barreling at me. I struggled to run but something collided with my back sending me to the ground. I struggled to stand but it was impossible as hits and kicks rained down upon me. “Dirty hanyou! How dare you! Who gave you permission to hunt in my territory!?” I yelled out in pain and struggled to protect my belly in the hopes of protecting my unborn pup. It seemed as if the beating would never stop. I lay there bloody and broken praying it would end. As suddenly as it had started it ended. “Remember that hanyou. This is my territory, should you decide you want to try hunting in my area again remember this lesson.” With that he wandered off and left me laying there. My body began healing itself as I lay there but something didn’t feel right. Something was wrong, something that couldn’t be healed. I shakily stood up and began making my way back to my cave. It took longer than it should have to get there and on the way I began having horrible pains that traveled from my midsection and along my spine. I crawled into my cave, laying on my bed of moss, furs and cloth and struggled through horrible pains. I felt wetness seep through my hakama and knew then that it was serious. I struggled out of my bottoms as the pain worsened and soon found sounds similar to that of the birthing human woman’s escaping from my own mouth. The light of day vanished and I lay there in the dark of my cave gasping and writhing until I felt something pressing against an entrance I had not possessed before. I struggled and pushed as searing burning pain came from that entrance and a pressure that made everything below the waist hurt. I struggled and pushed until the pressure lessened momentarily with a gush of liquid. I felt a new pressure begin which I struggled through and as the light glistened anew into the cave opening I felt something slide quietly from my body. I lay there gasping realizing that I had birthed my pup. I struggled into a sitting position sobbing as I did so and looked down at the small blood and mucous covered body of a male pup born too early. He barely had any hair but what he had was black and his ears were so small and pointed. I gently picked him up and gently massaged his chest in the hopes of provoking cries or movement but there was none. My instincts kicked in and I gently squeezed its nose and opened its mouth gently removing mucous and liquid as I shook it softly and massaged his tiny body. No sound and no movement… I had lost my pup. I hadn’t enjoyed the act in which he was gotten but I had enjoyed carrying him once I had learned of him. I had failed him. I had grown stronger but it wasn’t enough. I was still not strong enough, I needed to grow stronger. I pulled him against my chest and sobbed as I rocked back and forth crying my frustration and sadness. When my sobs subsided into sniffles and an occasional snuffle I looked down to realize I had birthed something grotesque and bloody. I used my claws to separate his cord from the mess and then I stood shakily, holding his body against mine one handed. I struggled to the back of the cave where I picked up a small piece of animal fur and proceeded to wrap him in it. I grabbed another pieced and placed it between my thighs to staunch the bleeding which had slowed but still continued to drip down my thighs and legs. It was as if I were working through my sadness. I placed my son on the birthing nest and proceeded to clean myself off before redressing. It was once again night; a full day had passed since I had birthed. I cleaned the cave, disposed of the bloody bedding and the cord sack and then I went outside and found nice spot beside a maple sapling not far from the cave. I began digging and as night became day I went and retrieved my son and placed him into the deep hole, covering him completely with the furs before I began the task of pulling dirt over his grave, silent tears falling into the dirt as I did so. When the grave was covered with dirt I then gathered stones and covered his grave with them letting any who wandered by know that this was a grave. I sat there at his grave for two days and two nights more before I entered the cave one last time. I devoured my rations and took many more and stashed them into my hakama pockets and sleeves before leaving. I stopped at the grave with a silent promise of becoming as strong as a demon, also swearing to beat and destroy the demon that had caused the loss of his life.   To Be Continued… Must keep writing….. Kat ***** You’re Frozen ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 3: You’re Frozen   I had a new fire inside of me, one that was fueled by determination and a lot of revenge. I began training and soon my long legs and arms grew a bit of muscle. I started by chasing and taking on larger prey and I didn’t stop there as I picked fights with lesser demons and then greater ones. I soon met my goal of bringing down large healthy deer; first does and finally the antlered bucks. I didn’t stop there. I worked hard and even with a serious wound or two I still managed to bring down a warthog. I was proud and even prouder to have the scars from his large tusks on my right leg. My next goal was a bear itself but before I could meet that goal as well something more interesting wandered across my path. A tall, lanky figure who dressed in a flower patterned kimono hakama and steel spiked armor set with a fluffy object wrapped around his body, with eyes that contained the usual contempt I witnessed when those of pure demon blood found them-selves in my proximity; which he didn’t bother to keep hidden at all. He looked prettier than any demon I had seen so far and carried himself with such bearing that I could tell right away he wasn’t just any demon. His hair was silvery like moonlight and blew ever so slightly in the spring breeze, its consistency reminding me of spider silk; which parted at his forehead revealing a dark blue crescent moon. His eyes were golden just like my own but were lined with crimson like some geisha but double stripes along each cheek let me know it was not a makeup job but natural markings. By the smell of him I could tell he was an Inu Youaki. I played it safe and knelt in a defensive manner waiting to see what his actions would be. “And here this Sesshomaru thought I could make it through my life pretending that the stain upon the Inukami name would eventually be eaten and cease to be,” he said in a bored monotone with a snobbish sniff. I stood up a little and looked into his face, “Inukami name?” “How typically ignorant you are. You are the bastard our father left behind, what a sad memento you are,” he said as he looked down his nose at me as if I were a pile of turds. “So you are my brother,” I asked outright. Why play word games when truthfully I had no patience or time for them. “Half; and even that this Sesshomaru refuses to acknowledge,” he said flipping hair over his shoulders. “Do the remaining members of Inukami clan realize that you dress like a woman? Or do they actually think your one? If you’re going to pretend you really should stuff your kimono with meat buns or something,” I responded as I stood to get a better look at him. At that he growled and pure hatred entered the all too familiar looking gold eyes and he lunged at me with the intent of killing me. It was surprising and yet it gave me an adrenaline rush. I managed to dodge and escape bigger attacks that included his venomous claws. I escaped our first meeting a little worse for wear but proud of myself. That began a grand game between us. He wanted me to never exist and I wanted to prove that I was better than any full blooded demon alive. Our fights made me stronger; worse for the wear but stronger. A year of this and more practice with prey until I had taken down a bear and it was then that I decided to go after the bear demon who had caused me to lose my pup. I returned to the maple and my pups’ grave and knelt pulling weeds and cleaning the stones before I paid proper respects and then I stood up vowing to return with a memento. I started by sniffing out the bear demons scent and upon finding it I followed it found him lounging not far from where I had been attacked, lying on his back next to a ravaged warthog carcass. I approached and I heard a deep inhale of breath and a loud snort as he cleared his throat, “Thought I told you to stay away from my hunting grounds hanyou.” “That was before you stole something precious from me,” I responded flexing my claws. He sat up and grinned before standing up to his full bulky height and stared across at me, “You mean the bastard that you carried?” I growled and ran at him. I dodged long meaty arms with knife like claws and swiped at his right leg as I dove to the ground, sliding into a standing position which I then turned and clawed his back repeatedly before he turned to smack at me missing once again and I slid on his other side swiping at his left leg. I slid into a standing stance again and flung his blood and flesh off of my claws and onto the leaf littered ground. He charged at me and I jumped into the air but was caught my right ankle. I didn’t let it deter me as I twisted and swiped and clawed at his face causing him to fling me away and into a tree. It hurt and the wind was momentarily knocked out of me but his clawed eyes and blood seeping into them gave me enough time to stand and ready myself. I attacked again swiping at his right arm and coming behind him, gaining a few feet and then I ran at him jumping into the air and coming down to drop kick him onto his belly and face, staying on his back where I dug my claws into his back and shoulders and viciously dug into his flesh so that his fur covered clothes were gone leaving scratched and bleeding flesh. He rolled and I jumped off smacking at his side as I did so. Anger fueled me and as he swiped at my side I stopped only momentarily to see my blood seeping through the tears in my firerat haori/hakama before I growled and reached down to touch my sides; my fingers coming away blood soaked. Something clicked as I raised my hands fresh with my blood and felt ki gather and threw my blood watching as it transformed into dagger-like knives which sliced the arms, legs and torso of the bear demon. He gave a startled look and took a step back, re-evaluating me all of a sudden. “Flying blades of blood,” he asked in surprise. I had done something unexpected and he seemed unsure. I grinned and brought my hand to my bleeding side again, making sure to soak my fingers in the coppery scarlet substance leaving my body. “What was that about my loss,” I asked as I raised my hand again. He turned to run but I once again flung my ki filled blood at him again yelling out as I did so, “Hijin Ketsusou~!” I watched as the blades severed his limbs and his neck. I watched his head roll off his shoulders and stop a few feet away where his now dead eyes stared blankly out at nothing, a look of surprised fear frozen in place instead of the cocky grin he had started with. I approached and lifted the severed head by his shaggy hair and spit on his carcass, “This will be a fine gift for my pup.” And I did just that. I took the severed head to my pup’s grave and set it beside his stone covered burial place. I went to a nearby stream and cleaned myself as well as my clothing. Night came and I found myself back in my abandoned cave, finding everything where it had been before I had left. I dusted off old furs and hung my clothes to dry. I laid down and had a good nights sleep for the first time in a long time. I awoke in the morning and dressed in my now dry clothes and made my way to the nearby flower field. I picked an array of flowers and brought them back to the grave, decorating it in beautiful fall colors before saying goodbye and taking off feeling a little lighter for having accomplished not only in avenging myself and my pup but achieving a new weapon; Hijin Ketsusou, flying blades of blood.   To Be Continued…. Still have plenty more to write. I have written this story down up to chapter 12 in a little notebook. I wasn’t joking when I said that I couldn’t get this story out of my head. Kat ***** When Your Heart’s not open ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 4: When Your Heart’s not open I traveled the roads more often than the woods lately. My victories over the few demons that dared crossed my path left me in high spirits and perhaps cockier than I should have the right to be. Humans who saw me usually gave me room and tried to not look me in the eye. There were others who tried to provoke me and start trouble but I usually gave them a glare and walked away. I didn’t need the added trouble they caused and it wouldn’t gain me anything in the end. I would sometimes sit high in treetops or on rooftops and watch normal humans in their everyday actions and it was during these watching sessions that one human in particular caught my attention. He was no older than twenty full seasons and he was an unusual one to behold. He was tall and what I saw of his body seemed toned and muscled but not overly so. He wore the clothes of monkhood and it hid most of his body. I was not truly interested in the same sex but this man in particular had caught my attention with his high cheekbones and deep inset eyes always with a friendly and calm look to them. His lips were full but always set in a serious way but those eyes seemed so full of life, humor and happiness that you hardly noticed the serious set of his mouth. He had yet to shear his hair off and what he had was long and kept in a ponytail at his back barely noticeable against his ebony monks clothes; only the shine of it giving you any indication that he was yet un-sheared. He usually kept his straw hat in place and from what I observed he only removed it when he thought no one was looking. I watched him and somewhat followed him but only from my high perches. At times he would stop and look in my direction, and then he would smile and continue on his way. If he saw me he acted no differently and said nothing to those he occasionally traveled with nor the villagers in the places he stopped. I wondered if there more than one reason he had chosen the monkhood as his calling. Something in him called to me and I wondered if he didn’t possess just a bit of power. Perhaps he had the blood of some demon, god or goddess in his family way back in his bloodline. As the new moon approached I had made the decision to visit the town he was currently assisting in. I must have been crazy if not totally insane with infatuation for him and yet I didn’t seem worried enough to not go through with my plans. As night fell I felt the change take hold and once it was finished and I was once again an ebony haired and brown eyed human I entered the town and found myself following eagerly behind his other followers as he made his rounds. It wasn’t until he had stopped at an old shrine in the middle of two out of the way homes to pray, that I realized I was the only one following him. Once he had finished his prayer he wrapped his beads around his hands and stood fully turning to look at me. “So young one, tell me what has enticed you to follow me all evening long,” as asked as he stared down at me with those deep ebony eyes. I had no answer for him, none that I could easily say without sounding strange. “Let us start with simpler questions, what is your name,” He asked as he took a seat upon a stone marking the next town’s direction. “Yasha,” I responded softly. “What an unusual name,” he commented looking me over. “I am told my father named me,” I replied honestly. “And where are your parents,” he asked with that enchanting grin in place. I was unsure how to answer his question and it must have shown on my face because he answered for me as if he could read the answer on my face or worse yet as if he had pulled it from my mind. “They are in the next realm,” he stated and not asked. I nodded silently and his eyes lost their happiness momentarily. “Are you looking for a place to belong,” he asked. I was but I knew it couldn’t be with him or with any others he knew. He was a trained monk and monks and demons were like oil and water; not a good mix. “No. I just wanted to talk,” I answered. His smile returned and he nodded, “You are a strange one Yasha but not in a bad way.” That made me smile and he stood up and approached me placing his hand upon my head and patting it softly. It mad me happy and yet I felt slightly insulted. “I’m not a child,” I responded but didn’t shake off his touch. “I apologize, Yasha. You look young, how many years are you,” he asked taking a good look at me. I couldn’t give him the truth; no human looked as I did at sixty years so I tried to think of an age that I was close to in human years. “Are you uncertain,” he asked. I nodded and he looked at me thinking, “I can hazard a guess of fourteen years but I could be wrong. If you have lived a hard life your weight and height would be off leaving you closer to fifteen or sixteen.” I fiddled with my hakama sleeves and asked, “My age doesn’t matter for us to continue meeting and talking does it.” “What a silly question, of course not,” he replied looking at me with a look of amusement and bewilderment. I couldn’t help but grin and he in return grinned. His smile was bright and contagious in nature and so I found myself drawn like a moth to a flame which was unusual because those who had the power to purify demons often had the opposite effect on demons and hanyou alike. “What is your name,” I asked excited to learn one more detail about him. He smiled at me as he made his reply, “Hatsunuma Kyoshiro.” “Hatsunuma-sama, or is it Sensei,” I asked as I felt my chest fill with happiness at saying his name for the first time. “Since I am to call you Yasha how about you just call me Kyoshiro?” “Kyoshiro,” I said it aloud and he smiled and patted me on the head saying ‘good boy’ as he did so. It was hard to believe that such a simple thing could make me feel like the darkness that seemed to hover around me had been chased away. And so we talked all the way into the night until I had to say my farewell with the promise of meeting him on the next new moon. Days became long bothersome things and for the first time since my mother’s death I looked forward to my human night. I continued with my odd behavior of following him and watching him interact with others and I felt apart of his world if only for a while and then for the briefest of time I would change and meet up with him again and we would spend our time talking. We did this rain or shine, always meeting at some shrine; old or new, for over half a year. Each time we got closer and finally after our sixth meeting I found myself pulled and desperate to see him. On that night it was thundering and lightening and the shrine was old and abandoned one that should be demolished if not refurbished and even the awning over the shrine itself failed miserably at keeping the rain off of me from where I stood waiting for Kyoshiro. Upon his arrival he immediately took me in his arms, holding me close which was a wonderful moment in itself and made more wonderful when in panic I told him his clothes would get soaked if he didn’t let go. It was not the first time he had held me so close but each time was like the first and left me with a fluttery jittery feeling. He laughed full throated and jovial, “Have you not noticed that I am drenched to the bone dear Yasha?” I blushed and tried to hide my face in the crook of his arm but he would not allow it as he pulled my face up and connected our lips. So warm and soft and they tasted of rain and green tea. I closed my eyes and he walked forward moving me forward with him until we bumped into the old sliding door of the shrines main building. Our lips moved and soon they parted and his tongue invaded my mouth like an eel wriggling in a cave. It was not unpleasant but new and my gasp of surprise allowed him to plunder my mouth fully. That was something new and he seemed to enjoy the surprise he had given me as he drew back and grinned down at me with my pink dusted cheeks and lust filled blank expression. “My little Yasha your face makes me feel impure and full of evil. You truly remind me of a virginal Ashura. A child of temptation that has lured me to sin and yet I don’t feel the least bit repentant.” I blushed even more if possible and my limbs trembled with excitement as I clenched his robes in my small hands. He lifted me into his arms and carried me into the shrine past creaking and almost falling off the hinges sliding doors. We entered through a second set of doors which he slid closed with his foot and the proceeded forward. He came to the wall where shrine shelves would usually have held offerings and statues but instead they were bare. He sat me upon the shrine and proceeded to attack my ears and neck working his way down to my collar, his hands busy removing my haori and hakama as he did so. I was too lost in sensation and pleasure to really realize what he was doing and I was far more interested in his lips behind my ear and his fingers toying with my sensitive nipples to notice that I was down to last layer of clothing before he would reach my fundoshi. He divested my body of all clothing and I sat there gasping and shaking staring down at him realizing that I was the only one bare for the world to see. I tugged on his robes with trembling hands, “Off,” I demanded. He smiled and kissed my nose and nodded, “As my Ashura demands of me.” And so I watched as flesh was revealed and awed as my previous assumptions of a well chiseled chest and abs were revealed. His arms were muscled and toned and his hips were even more so. He stood still grinning letting me take in his full body and came close so that my small hands could play along his arms first and then his chest and stomach, his abs making me jealous with the muscles that stuck out. I reached up and placed my hands on his face and pulled him down so that I could kiss his lips, his cheeks and his forehead before returning to his lips. This time I explored the feeling of his mouth, cheeks and tongue pulling away and grinning up at him as we both gasped for lost breath. I watched as he leaned in and once again kissed his way down my lips, chin, neck and chest and continued downward stopping to kiss and lick at my belly causing me too writhe and gasp. Instinct brought my fingers to mouth and I chewed on them when I was at a loss as to what to do with them. He continued down and came to my fundoshi which he untied and then set aside as he gazed down at my now fully nude body. My erection was pink and weeping as it pointed upward as if pointing at him accusingly for having caused its current condition. He reached down and gently stroked his fingers along it bringing forth mores gasps and moans from my mouth as I shook like a blade of grass in the wind. He finally took firm grasp of it and proceeded to stroke up and down; my member encased in his warm hand as he did so, my leaking fluids causing his ministrations to go more smoothly. I opened my dampened eyes and watched as lifted his other hand sucked two fingers into his own mouth thoroughly coating them in his saliva. He removed his fingers and I watched as they disappeared past his stroking hand and I felt slickened fingers part me and then circle my entrance slowly. I closed my eyes as memories flooded back of the men and what they had done. What they had done felt nothing like this but would it go in that direction, would things take a turn for the worse? I felt the first finger slide past yielding flesh and enter deep inside where it only stayed still for a moment before he began to move it in and out slowly and then he stretched deep inside of me and I felt him touch something that tore a loud moan from throat and jolted pleasure throughout my body. He slid in and out touching that place repeatedly and purposely as he did so stopping and then pulling out. I felt disappointment and then I felt stretched even more as a single finger became two and he repeated the process once more of stretching me while reaching for that pleasurable spot. He did this one more time adding a third finger before removing them completely. I lay there gasping, fighting for breath as I heard him spit. I looked up and watched him place his spit covered palm on his own red and aching member and stroke it as he had my own, slicking it as he did so. He did this two more times and then I watched as he brought that hardness between my thighs and opened me further as his hips came fully between them. He moved slowly, pushing that slick warmth past my stretched entrance until the tip of him finally entered. He stopped giving me time to adjust and then he pushed further in and stopped again. He did this every few inches until I could feel his hips flush against my bottom, meaning he filled me completely. I gasped and struggled not to move away from him. It was painful but not nearly as horrible as my first experience and although I was stretched and felt overly filled I did not feel torn or ripped, just ‘full’. He once again took my member began pumping it, bring it to life once more and as he did so he slowly pulled out and then back in until he found a rhythm. It seemed to take little or no time for the blinding pleasure to overtake me as I screamed his name and blinding flashes of light overcame my vision and I writhed in his arms like a snake on fire as he too fulfilled his completion and pleasure deep inside my body. We lay there gasping and I realized that happy tears were slipping from my eyes. There was a way to rut that was not demeaning or painful and had taken such a horrible experience in order for me to truly realize what a great thing this was.   To Be Continued…. Sorry if it was a little raunchy. My thoughts were jumbled tonight so I tried my best to make this scene touching but some how it just became really pornographic….. Maybe I shouldn’t listen to Kerli’s Army of Love while writing LoL Kat ***** You’re So Consumed with how much you get ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 5: You’re So Consumed with how much you get   Morning always comes too fast and as it did I pressed a kiss to his forehead, jostling fallen and tangled black locks as I did so. I watched his trademark smile appear briefly before he snuggled into his robes which I had laid atop him while I donned my own. I quietly and slowly slid open the old shoji doors and left with one final look back, the image of him smiling etched in my memories. I should have distanced myself but I couldn’t do it, it was as if he were water and I leaf lost in the current. I once again spent my days watching him from afar as he traveled and he always seemed as though he were not only doing his duties but searching for something. I followed him back to our abandoned shrine as the night of the new moon once again fell upon us along with the night and my transformation. He eagerly ran to me upon hearing my footsteps and when I emerged before him he caught me in the circle of his arms, lifting me up and holding me close. No questions were asked and no assumptions made. It was as if we had never separated. We talked, snuggled and made love long into the morning only this time he did not fall asleep. He stayed up until I once again donned my clothes and turned towards him, my heart heavy and my chest tight. “So you must again leave me like a ghost to vanish without a sign,” he asked so somberly. I nodded and looked down at my hands from where there peeked through red sleeves, “If I could stay I would but there are things…” He didn’t let me finish as he ended my sentence for me, “that keep you from me, things that I don’t understand but I do wish you would tell me so that I could try.” I walked over and stood on my tippy-toes and he leaned down and our lips met in a tender soft way, not in the heated way they had connected earlier in the night. We parted and I tried to offer him a smile but it felt half-hearted and I knew my sorrow and confusion showed. “Go my Yasha, we shall meet again during the next new moon.” I turned and left and as I passed through the thickest of the woods I transformed as warm tears saturated my now silver locks. He was my happiness but I knew it had to end. I hadn’t met any hanyou’s nor had I heard any tales of them living happily ever after. It all seemed so hopeless and yet I couldn’t just give up. I couldn’t stop moving.   It was after our ninth new moon meeting and our third time joining that I began to feel off. My overly sensitive nose became a weakness as every and any smell that were strong left me weak to the point of collapsing. I had to avoid villages for that very reason which meant no watching Kyoshiro in his daily routines. The mere thought left me teary eyed and depressed, yet another symptom; I cried easily and with little or no provocation. It wasn’t until the new moon came and I was once again in Kyoshiro’s arms that I realization hit me like an arrow through the heart. We lay snuggled on borrowed blankets after an enjoyable coupling and we were basking in the afterglow and each other when his hands played over my belly. He seemed almost fascinated with it and then harmless words were uttered. “My dear Yasha I do believe our love has made you healthy.” I looked down at my stomach where his hands continued to explore and saw that I had developed a small bump that protruded just enough to make it noticeable but not enough to be seen through clothing. I blinked a few times and closed my eyes fighting back panic and at the same time a small amount of joy. I was once again carrying. Inside my body grew a child, a child conceived of love. Mine and Kyoshiro’s child… My eyes grew hot and I felt an errant tear slip from under my closed lids and suddenly Kyoshiro grew stiff. “Oh, Yasha. I wasn’t saying it to be mean, I quite like you round. It’s almost as if our love making had bore fruit. It would be quite beautiful if you could carry a child like the women I bless in the village.” I nuzzled against him and knew that this would be the end of our love. That I would have to say good bye with a smile as morning came and pretend that I wasn’t saying it for the last time. “I know Kyoshiro, I know. I am just overcome with emotion when I am with you,” I opened my eyes and he grinned and leaned forward pressing a kiss to my temple as he held me close. I watched as he fell asleep, his hand still covering my belly and the irony of it all filled me with dread and sorrow. I watched him sleep and took in all of him; the feel of his body, the sound of his soft snores, his scent of incense, sandalwood and green tea, the silkiness of his black tresses and the subtle muscles that wound their way through his legs and arms and then there was the sound of his beating heart. I couldn’t fall asleep this night; I wanted him forever etched in my mind. I woke him up an hour or so away from dawn and drew him into what would be our last time making love. I made sure it was slow and sensual as his hands and mine played over our bodies like it had been the first time all over again. Our passions grew and our bodies found release and then he lie down again and fell asleep and I slid my body away from his wonderful heat and got dressed quietly. I leaned down and pressed a soft kiss on his forehead and then his lips and stood up as he mumbled out a soft “love you”. I left the building and the area with hot tears quietly flowing down my cheeks and even leaving trails down my neck. I didn’t look back, only up and forward.   To Be Continued… Short chapter but it seemed the appropriate place to stop at. Next chapter coming soon. Kat ***** Chapter 6: You waste your time with hate and regret ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 6: You waste your time with hate and regret   Looking back was a terrible idea. I knew it and yet I couldn’t help myself. I perched high in a tree whose leaves were tinged orange and brown and fought to hide myself as I watched Kyoshiro overseeing repairs to the old temple we had made love in so many times. It had been two months and I hadn’t returned to our meeting place during the new moon but I could always smell his scent which was renewed by each and every one of his visits and I felt horrible for leaving and not explaining myself to him. He had a right to know that the life that was now five new moons old was one he had fathered. I wasn’t an idiot and old fairytales my mother had told me as a child often had sad endings when a being revealed themselves to their human counterparts, sad tales of death where one or the other would die if not both. I couldn’t handle his rejection. It would tear my heart into thousands of pieces. I had many dreams of how he would react to my news and none were the happy ending that I so wanted. Just seeing him had caused my chest to ache and the child within seemed to sense its sire or perhaps my emotions at seeing him and moved endlessly whenever we were in his presence, even from my current distance. Our temple was gorgeous as it was made new with lumber, care and cleaning. I watched as he blessed it and I was surprised to see that it was not with the usual blessings. I felt no ill will in his blessing like I did at some of the other temples when they were freshly blessed. It was as if he were leaving an open invitation. I couldn’t allow myself the hope; too often my hopes and dreams were crushed.   ************************************************************   As the weather went from the cool breezes of spring to the beginnings of a hot stifling Summer I grew larger and my seventh month came upon me. I was extra careful to avoid humans and youkai alike and due to my depression I was late in locating a proper den. Something had led me to one of Kyoshiro’s old temples and it was there I had discovered a secret passage beneath the temple itself. I had decided it was as good a place as any and thus I began to once again gather the things needed for a proper den when the birth of a pup was nearing. The temple was seemingly abandoned and thus it provided me with shelter and many of the supplies I needed. I had made a bed of old tatami mats, curtains and cloths and the temple was more than covered in soft moss. I had managed to discover storage areas which contained candles and oils for light and thanks to reverent townspeople who still brought offerings I had a varied diet of fresh fruits, vegetables, pickles, the occasional bottle of sake’ and meat buns. At night when I sensed no human or youkai presence I went hunting, bringing back meat to be eaten and the rest dried and pelts to lie on and wrap my pup in once it was born.   ************************************************************   I was overly heated and exhausted as my eighth month came. I wanted nothing more than to sleep and eat. I managed to find some respite from the heat of the day in a nearby stream that was fed from the nearby mountain making it almost cold. I seemed to distress the nearby wildlife who had also come to the stream for that very reason. I let them be, I was in no shape to hunt anyway and that caused their discomfort level to drop some. As I neared the end of my eight months I felt the occasional ache in my belly and with it an occasional tightness but nothing close to what I had felt when I had lost my first pup. I took it as a good sign and lessened my trips out, keeping myself in the area of the temple. My feet were swollen and my chest tender enough that even wearing my hakama had become uncomfortable. As the first week of my ninth month began so did what I suspected to be the beginning actual pains of the incurring birth. The new opening had once again developed and not a day afterward had I discovered a blood tinted stain on my fundoshi. I stayed in my hidden den and waited for things to progress and did they ever... I continued to have pains and they increased in volume as well as timing. I went from almost ignoring them to pacing in my den which was just a hair higher than me. I found myself stopping and rocking into the pains as their intensity grew and when they ended and when I could catch my breath I walked on hoping to speed the whole ordeal. The pains soon overwhelmed me and I took to leaning against pillars and the walls when they were near enough. The pressure built and I could feel as my pup descended into place putting added pressure on my new opening which seemed to almost stretch in an attempt to give with the pressure. There was no one around so I soon divested myself of my clothing and found myself pacing back and forth in my den as nude as the day I had been born. The thought amused me momentarily and then the next pain came. I gave up on pacing as the pressure grew and with it a sudden gush of fluids poured down my thighs and legs and the pressure tripled. I leaned against the wall on my soft bed of furs, moss and tatami mats and with my free hand explored the spot of intense pain and pressure and felt a rounding surface forcing its way out of my stretched opening. It was damp and soft fuzz covered it. The head! I was close. I slowly slid into a kneeling position and rocked into the pain as it came causing my belly to tighten, pushing as I did so. I felt the head shift forward and kept my free hand there to judge my progress as I struggled to push. The pain built and I struggled through the pain wailing and grunting through the stinging pain and horrible contractions that threatened to crush me. I had a moment to catch my breath before it doubled and the pain intensified and I pushed feeling that pressure abate for a moment as the head slid out into my palm. I could feel the full round shape of a head and the soft gooey hair that covered its head. I wanted to sob but the sharp pain made that sob into a loud outcry as I struggle through the onslaught of continuing pain and an even stronger pain as the shoulders began to work their way through and I bore down with everything I had left in me. I was almost numb with pain below the waist and then it happened the pressure lessened and I found myself single-handedly trying to hold the slippery body of my pup as I struggled to support myself on my knees alone so that I could use my other hand as well. Once I had a good hold of my pup I brought it upwards to above my belly. I stared down at its back and rubbed it causing gargled intakes of breath that then became coughing cries and wails. As soon as its cries sounded less garbled I turned it carefully in my hands and discovered that I had bore yet another son. He was slowly pinkening up which could almost be seen through the goo that covered his body. I reached for cloth I had set beside my bed and began to wipe gently at his body while he wailed angrily at my actions. I wiped him as gently as I could and watched his small limbs shake and whip to and fro in anger. The little one certainly had my attitude. At least he had his fathers ebony locks. I felt pressure build and I pushed feeling the massive mess leave my body with the help of my kneeling position and my still contracting muscles. I had no idea what it was called and I could only assume it had some purpose in being inside of me but I could only hazard a guess as to what. The cramping continued and the renewed wetness on my thighs told me that I was bleeding just like I had with my first birthing. I reached down and brought the cord attached to my son close to my mouth and bit down separating him from the mess, making it easier to move with him in my arms. I stood shakily and made my way to a pile of furs and pelts and found the softest on top, wrapping my son in it and then gently laying him on our bed in a clean and clear spot while I removed the soiled top layer and the grotesque pile of flesh that I had expelled. For now I moved it into a corner and bundled it until the odor was barely noticeable and then I found extra leather and a clean fundoshi and made quick work of it making the leather an absorbent pad and using my fundoshi to tie it into place. I threw on the first layer of my hakama and lightly tied it in place. My son had fallen asleep in a nest of fur so I carefully and somewhat painfully lay next to him, pulling him in against me so that I could feel his warmth and listen to his soft breathing. I let it lull me to sleep. I awoke to my sons wails and found my chest overly sensitive and swollen. I knew why and I carefully sat up into a lounging position. I lifted my mewling son as gently as I could until he lay snuggled against my now dripping nipple. He needed no guidance as he turned his head into my chest making smacking noises with his lips until he connected with the source of my discomfort and began to suckle hardily. It was an unnerving feeling first and even slightly painful but the pain abated as my chest was all but drained. I had watched nursemaids in the court care for infants and knew that he had to burp and I brought him to my shoulder and began to gently pat his back, occasionally rubbing until I heard one tiny burp which was followed by another. He seemed fussy still so I brought him to the other nipple and allowed him to eat his fill and then I burped him until he fell asleep. While he was napping I ate from my supplies and then I too took a nap until he woke me with his mewling cries. I smelled the odor of soiled blankets and so I changed him, taking care to clean in-between crevices with a warm wet rag and re-bundled him in a clean fur. And that became my life…my world. I repeated the procedure over and over again and I would until he no longer needed me to. I healed and he ate, slept and grew.   To Be Continued…. Thanks for your patience~! Sorry it’s been a while. I moved and have already gone through two roommates and it hasn’t even been a year yet! I worked Otakon once again (20th anniversary!), that makes 7 years staffing and 7 years before I attended so 14 altogether. I had a little time off after Otakon so I managed to work on a few fics. Some need complete overhauls but I decided it would be best to update what I could. I’ll try my best to update soon. Kat ***** Chapter 7: You’re Broken ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 7: You’re Broken   The first few days of being a parent were hard. It hadn’t taken long for me to heal but I was a nervous wreck, afraid that I would do something wrong, afraid that I would somehow make some horrible mistake. I had little to no sleep after that first night. On the third night after the birth I made a small carrier out of alter cloths and wrapped it around my body before placing my little one in it, making sure he was secure I grabbed the soiled bedding and snuck out into the early evening. I managed to find a group of bushes far enough from my den and I set to work digging a deep enough hole to bury them in using only claws and hands. Once I had the hole dug I threw them in and proceeded to cover them with dirt and then I stomped and walked over the place making sure the dirt lay flat. I grabbed nearby pine needles and scattered them around making it look like a breeze had blown them loose, in the hopes that their scent would help mask any lingering scent of blood. I finished and made my way to the small stream. I stripped around my carrier, taking it off last and divested my son of his furs as I knelt into a sitting position on a flat rock in the middle and cupped the somewhat warm water gently pouring it over him causing him to kick and fuss. I continued until he was clean and then I singlehandedly began to clean myself and my hair. I was as clean as I was going to get and most importantly I had removed the traces of any remaining blood and sweat from my person. I rewrapped my yet to be named pup and lay him in front of me on a soft patch of grass as I quickly dressed. He lay there quietly with his eyes closed and I as adorned my handmade carrier and gently placed him back into it I thought of names. He certainly was a respectful child. He rarely cried and the many names that could mean respect played in my mind. The one that seemed to stand out was Shohei. I found it a fitting name and then I thought that perhaps he was just a respectful spirit just as my mother had called me a rambunctious one. Spirit… Ikki? Sho…hei…iki….Shoheiki! I looked down at fluttering eyelashes and as he opened his closed eyes revealing pale golden brown I grinned down at him, “You will be Shoheiki.” He yawned proclaiming in his own way that he could care less but I felt happy at the choice. It was with that happiness that we returned to our den and I fed him while I fed myself.   *************************************************************   Our first month was trying to say the least. The weather that summer was horrible. I stayed in the cool dark shade of my hidden den where I nursed Shoheiki and tried to stay cool. I ventured out only in the evening which was only to gather more water or food and once I had acquired it I swiftly made way back. I never left Shoheiki, a thousand horrible scenarios ran through my head, things that would more than likely never happen but a parent’s paranoia is sometimes without reason, not that I believed I was without my reasons. Shoheiki took all my mothering as any newborn, with wide golden eyes that were filling more and more with who he would become. It was amazing to see him learning and discovering himself and his surroundings. As one month lead into another I watched him wiggle until he could roll over and then watched him go from rolling over on the fur covered floor to pulling himself up on his knees and from that to crawling around our makeshift den and home. He went from strictly nursing to now eating soft fruits and vegetables and the occasional meat that I pre-chewed for him until it was mush. He enjoyed food as much as I did and made a sound close to a howl as he ate and enjoyed his meals. He babbled working on sounds and words, trying to repeat words I said to him. I talked to him a lot, with no one else to communicate with he became my world in more than one way. As the month of August came and went and Shoheiki celebrated his first year I decided that it was time to venture from our safe haven and perhaps wander a bit, allowing him and I to stretch our legs more. It went well as I traveled in the woods, usually with Shoheiki strapped to my back and in the safety of the tall tree limbs. At night I would search for an unused den, outcropping, cave or hollowed tree and if none were found we would snuggle up on the sturdiest and widest branch we could find. I soon discovered that venturing from my safe den was not a good idea. The smell of a hanyou and hanyou child seemed to attract all manner of demons, more so than I usually attracted. I could only surmise that it was the smell of Shoheiki. I knew that the young ones were considered tender to most demons and a rare treat if found but those that flocked to us went from few to many. It started with one or two small creatures that more often than not saw me and decided it was not worth the effort or possible loss of life but soon that changed. They started grouping together and then the larger and more powerful ones began to show up. I was able to outrun them, hide from them and on the rare occasions when I was just plain fed up beat them to a bloody pulp but it became such a problem that I couldn’t find peace at night or day and I began to wear down. I was exhausted and it was on a cold snow covered night on Shoheiki’s fifteenth month of life that I was attacked once again. There were no trees in sight as I made my way towards the village where I had met Kyoshiro almost two years ago. Only fields covered in snow and frost and dirt roads transformed into mud and frozen slush covered hells. It was dusk when the group of three appeared out of no where, from their smell and ragged fur covered bodies I could tell they were wolves and the way they surrounded and proceeded to circle me confirmed the hunting style. “We have come upon quite a sad sight here have we not brothers,” asked the most muscle-bound of the group who also appeared to be the oldest. His long hair was pulled back into a ponytail and his tanned face bore quite a few scars that were noticeable due to their pale color among the darkness of his skin. “He has to be the skinniest hanyou we’ve ever found, barely any flesh on his bones, I’d almost say he wasn’t worth the effort,” said the second who had his brothers height but not the muscles, his skin just as dark. “Oh…but that makes him a quick meal til we find something more filling, like some of those mortals in the village,” responded the youngest and last of the group. Unlike the others his hair was shorn and he had yet to gain muscle or height. “Well brothers, let us make quick work of him and then we can go find us something more,” said the eldest and then he lunged at me. I jumped back and skidded to the right barely avoiding the middle brother’s attack from behind. This startled the youngest who failed to make his attempt and I clenched my hand tightly digging claws into my own palm until it hurt and I felt the warmth of blood start to flow. “Oh, this one still has some fight in him,” the middle brother called out in excitement. He lunged and I was careful to avoid him and to not accidentally expose Shoheiki who was wrapped on my back and bundled in a layer of furs. I was about to fling my blades of blood when claws came out of no where digging into my stomach sending me flying backwards skidding on my feet through the slushy mud but not falling down. The movement caused Shoheiki to be jostled violently and he awoke and began to cry and flail. “OH! He’s carrying an extra snack! You hear that boys! He’s got a little one with him,” the middle brother cried out excitedly approaching me. I quickly flung out my hand crying “Hijin Ketsusou” and watched as the bloody blades slashed at both the eldest and middle brothers causing them to cry out in pain. I clenched both palms desperately now causing new blood to pour out. The youngest made a go at me from behind trying to rip Sho from my back and I swung around slashing his face and flinging him backwards to the ground causing him to slide a few feet away as I lifted my bloody claws once more and cried out “Hijin Ketsusou” as the two older brothers made a charge at me once more and the blades tore into their flesh not stopping them, I feared the worst and then a blinding light filled the now dark road and the brothers covered their eyes cowering before the light. I followed it finding its source to be none other than the village monks with their rosaries and staffs out chanting as they approached. I took the chance that was given and took off into the dark. I ran not looking back, the swaying of my running lulling Shoheiki into quiet once more. I ran until I found myself at the old temple and didn’t stop until I was safely inside and then I found my old secret passageway and dropped into my den which still smelled of me and Shoheiki. I uncovered myself and pulled him from back bringing him before me so that I could look him over. I checked every finger and toe until I was satisfied and then I pulled him close and laid down letting go of the pent up stress and emotions I had held in and allowed myself to cry softly as I held Shoheiki close thanking whatever god or goddess that had been looking out for us. Once my tears were cried out and Shoheiki had fallen into a pleasant slumber I just lay there watching him sleep and knew what I had to do…. I had to find him somewhere to stay, somewhere safe. And as I thought about it the image of the monks played over and over in my head. Shoheiki seemed to attract demons and the only way to make sure he would be permanently protected until he was old enough to care for himself was to place him with them. I kissed his forehead and pulled him against me.   To Be Continued…..   Sorry it took so long. When it rains it pours. My mother went into the hospital with an infection that caused them to amputate two of her toes and then she went into surgery again and they took her foot and then she went in again and they took her ankle and after 6 surgeries she has her upper leg and her life. So, all in all we feel blessed. Thanks for reading, hopefully will have more soon. Kat ***** Chapter 8: When your hearts not open ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 8: When your hearts not open   It is one thing to make a decision but to carry it out… I stared down at my almost two year old son who was toddling around in our old den under the abandoned shrine. He was oblivious to my thoughts and what the two of us were about to undergo and that was for the best. He would hopefully suffer no hardships and forgive me any troubles he happens upon during his life, whether it be long or short. There would be no telling. He looked human to me and as his teeth had grown in he looked to be safe. His canines were a bit sharper than most humans and his eyes leaned more to a pale autumn leaf; caught somewhere between brown and golden yellow. The only things that really gave him away was his scent and that would only be noticed by demons and hanyous and the other were his ears which had grown slightly pointed. I had decided that those would have to be fixed. It would pain him and it would hurt me to hurt him but if I was going to carry this plan out then it had to be done. I had found simple herbs that I knew would help dull pain and help with fever and set them aside. As night fell on second year of Shoheiki’s life I pulled him close to me in a hug and as carefully as I could nipped the very tip of his ear off. He pulled away from me crying and screaming and I could not stop the tears that fell from my eyes as I saw the betrayal in his. I spit out the torn flesh and brought him into my arms again as he cried and gently licked at the wound hoping my saliva would help it heal quickly. I turned his head and repeated the same action to his other ear. When I finished I held him close and rocked him as I had a thousand times before. Once he calmed I laid him down and made a weak tea out of the pain dulling herbs and offered him some. He drank very little but enough it seemed to help dull the pain. I watched him for signs of fever and was more than glad to see none. I made a healing poultice and salve and very gently applied it to his now more rounded and healing ears. I couldn’t be sure whether it was my salvia or his bodies own healing abilities but I was glad for it. The next day it was as if all the pain I had caused was forgotten and my son was once again himself, minus pointed ears. We spent one last week together as I waited for the night of the new moon. We played and walked and talked his vocabulary getting larger and larger, my heart feeling heavier with each day. As the last day approached I bathed him and then put him in a small set of clothing I had made out of yellow cloth I had pilfered and dressed myself in a raggedy kimono and furs. I wrote a note as best as I could on a thin piece of bark and slid it inside Shoheiki’s clothes. I put my hair in a ponytail and strapped Shoheiki to my back and tied a hood over my head. We started our journey into town as evening fell and as everyone was making their way home we had just made it into the town. It was easy to locate the town’s new shrine, the very one I had watched Kyoshiro bless. It had been so long since I had last seen him, I wondered if he was at this shrine or if he had wandered off to help elsewhere. As night fell I felt my claws vanish and with them my fangs. Feeling safer approaching the shrine as a human I did just that. The gate had already been closed for the night, a lit torch on each side of the gates just bright enough to see any who approached was my only light as I knelt and carefully removed Shoheiki. He had fallen asleep on our walk and his hands were clenching the carrier. I wrapped it around him, careful not to jostle him and made sure the note remained in his clothing. I leaned down and pressed a kiss on his forehead leaving behind a teardrop as I did so. I stood and quickly banged on the gate before taking off. I ran far enough that I would not be seen, hidden behind nearby bushes and trees. The loud knock had woken Shoheiki and he woke up wailing. That was all it took for the gates to be pulled open. Two young monks peeked out and then down at my crying son. One stayed while the other disappeared back behind the still open gate. I watched as the other searched the darkness until his friend returned. He brought with him an older monk who had a shaved head. It took only a moment for me to realize who that monk was…. my dearest Kyoshiro. Now shaven and a few years older but it was him. “No sign of the mother Hatsunuma Sama,” said the monk who had remained. He knelt down and searched my son’s clothes finding the note. I watched as he read it and then placed it in his sleeve before bending down and taking our son into his arms. “Seems we have another brother to care for, the note says his name is Shoheiki. Guessing from the clothes and care the mother took to get him here he was well loved. Let us continue that love.” The tears came and covered my face and neck in warm salty caresses as I sat there and watched the gates close. I can’t say how long I cried there, only that my legs were numb and unfeeling as I forced myself up and made my body move. I didn’t return to the shrine and I left the area all together. A broken heart is bad company for someone young and I needed trouble to forget and so that’s what I went looking for. I traveled and found trouble everywhere I went, whether in the form of humans or demons. I purposely picked fights, some I lost and others I won. I earned scars and respect and made a small name for myself. It was physical pain to replace emotional and I was okay with that. It was a year or more before I finally calmed enough to approach human villages again that was usually to hide my human stench among them so that I wouldn’t be a target for demons or give away my human night. I had somehow found myself in a very small village that was for the most part quiet. They had small shrines and held to survival desperately but they had among them a young lady who seemed to ooze power and strength. Rumor said that this priestess possessed a jewel that could make me a demon and so I decided to pursue this priestess. She was beautiful with ebony eyes like obsidian and long flowing ebony hair that shined like the heavens. Her name was Kikyo and she was the villages Priestess. She was always there for the people and yet she seemed so alone…so unapproachable. I found myself drawn to her and so I spent a good amount of my time following her. I couldn’t help myself at times, she seemed so much like myself and yet…not. One day I followed her into the woods and as I jumped from tree limb to tree limb as quietly as a bird of prey she stopped and stood there in the middle of clearing as if gearing for battle and it was then she called out to me. “If you attack me I shall end you.” The cocky self-assured tone brought my own cockiness out and I responded by jumping from my hiding spot to land in front of her. “You’re not worth the effort,” I responded grinning to spite her as I placed my hands on my hips. “Then why follow me so often,” she asked clearly not amused. It was then I sensed the many low level demons around us. I grinned wider and jumped over her slicing a lesser demon in half behind her ending its life and its attack, “Because you seem to be a source of constant fun and battles.” I watched as all the low level demons in the surrounding area descended on her and cut down many but she cut down just as many with her own powers. It was a sight to behold and I could see why the all wanted to devour her. Her power was a taste so unusual and strong that it seemed to call to us of that had demon blood. I can’t say that her power was the only thing to call out to me but it certainly helped. When they had all been vanquished I shook the blood from my claws and grinned over at her, “See…full of fun.” And thus began our odd relationship. I went from being her trailing dog and thinking about nothing but the jewel and its powers to soon becoming almost like a guardian and then to friend. We talked and she unburdened her soul to me and I did the same to her. I left out a lot of my life’s woes but she knew the biggest, my hanyou blood. Stuck between two worlds and despised by both. I began to think that our two lonely souls had called out to each other, like two souls separated or maybe I just wanted someone to love me and understand me so bad that I was willing sacrifice anything for it. She had discussed using the jewel so I could become human and we decided that was what we would do. I would become human and she and I would wed. She had become my world but so quickly that world my came tumbling down…. Kikyo attacked me and we fought, my fight ended with my body pinned to a tree, her arrow pinning me. My anger and heartache dulled into nothingness as I fell into a deep sleep.   To Be Continued….. Sorry it took so long. Mom’s working on using her prosthetic. Here’s hoping she’s walking again soon. Kat ***** Chapter 9: If I could melt your heart ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 9: If I could melt your heart   Peace and quiet never lasts long. That is a truth I have learned many times. I have been awoken by a girl who looks similar to Kikyo, though she is different in many ways. Her looks are part of it but her personality is the biggest difference. I wonder if Kikyo would have been like this had she had less power, although this girl named Kagome seems to have a power all her own. She had enough power to break Kikyo’s spell which Kikyo’s younger sister Kaede has reminded me more than once since my awakening, poor Kaede, yet another victim in all this. She is no longer the little girl I remember that held followed Kikyo like a shadow…no Kaede is a healer and though I won’t tell her she is a good at her craft. I have not been awake long but long enough to watch the Shikon no Tama be forcefully removed from Kagome’s body and then I watched it get shattered into tiny pieces by an arrow loosed by Kagome. I have been coerced into helping to find these pieces but part of me wants to find them. I will, and perhaps I shall use it to become a full demon and not a human like Kikyo and I had discussed.   It has been hell reliving my past. Thanks to my brother I have seen my father’s grave and relived the hellish memories of my mother but I have gained a sword from it all, the sword called Tessaiga. I have what my brother wants but he will only obtain it over my dead body.   ************************************************************   Another month has come and gone and have learned to sad truth of Kikyo’s life and death. We were both deceived by Onigumo. Why a human would willing become a hanyou is beyond me but now he is a foe and one I would like to defeat. We have gone from a traveling duo to a trio. Kagome and I have saved a fox kit named Shippo, he’s a brat as only a child can be. He reminded me that I have a son; if he still lives, somewhere out there. If he lives my Shoheiki would most likely be in his fifties. I wonder if he was as bratty as Shippo is at his age.   *************************************************************   Kagome has decided to return to “her time” and so we have traveled back to Kaede’s village. Shippo is making friends with the village children. I hung around for a bit before I finally struck out on my own for a bit. I traveled until I came to the old shrine outside of what was now a booming town, no longer a small village. The old shrine had been repaired and seemed filled with new faces and monks. I dared not go too close but as I watched among the tree branches an older man came out and I was taken aback by his familiar face. He looked like Kyoshiro, but Kyoshiro had to be in his seventies if he still lived. Upon closer examination it was then I saw the golden brown eyes, like honeyed pools but so fierce. He grinned at something a child did and I knew then that he was my son, my Shoheiki. Time pinned to the tree had stolen other glances I could have stolen but at least I had this. I knew he was alive and well. He looked important in his monks’ robes with his beaded necklaces. What demon blood he possessed seemed to have done him some good; he still looked to be in his thirties. He was handsome and reminded me much of his father. I watched as long as I dared and even after I could no longer see him I sat there a while longer. Before night fell I began making my journey back to Kaede’s village. Once back I discovered that Kagome had returned and she was once again ready to travel in search or jewel shards. We were on our way the very next morning.   *************************************************************   We have made acquaintances with a monk by the name of Miroku and a female demon hunter named Sango. The monk is lecherous but not a bad person. He was also wronged by Naraku and is seeking revenge. He is cursed with a wind tunnel in his palm that might one day devour him and those around him much like what happened to his father. The demon hunter is quiet but well versed in demons and has brought with her a nekomata companion named Kirara. Sango’s brother is being used and manipulated by Naraku. It is her hope to rescue him. I will help where I can as long as it does not hinder my mission of retrieving the jewel shards, though he does possess a piece. Our pack is growing and we all have a goal of destroying Naraku. We are quite the band of misfits.   *************************************************************   It has been hell after hell. I must control my demon side. It has appeared and is hard to control. It’s frightening to black out and wake up with your hands caked in blood, the looks in people’s eyes afterwards is far from heartening. We have come in contact with the leader of a pack of wolf demons by the name of Kouga. He is an ass but not really considered a threat. He might even be a possible ally. In the battle that is forthcoming. He is loud and obnoxious and seems to have his eye on Kagome. He has claimed her as a potential mate and tries to rile me up with that declaration. Some times he succeeds and others he does not. Kikyo’s body has been revived. She has become a being who lives on the souls of the deceased, such a sad existence and yet why does my heart clench when I see her? Why does my heart clench when Kagome is involved?   *************************************************************   The end of this battle is nearing, I can feel it. We have gathered allies and even my brother has joined us. He has changed and the proof is in the human girl Rin he revived. As we prepare to end this I can’t help but feel antsy. I want Kagome out of harms way if at all possible. I have come up with a plan. I must wait for her to return to her time and then I will see if my plan works.   *************************************************************   I have been stalking Naraku and followed his putrid scent to the outer rim of Kouga’s pack territory. And as I walked through the rocky forest I realized something felt off. The birds were silent and not another animal could be seen or sensed. It was eerily quiet and I noticed a second too late when the miasma appeared from above and as I dodged it came at me from all sides. It was thick and choking and each breath burned as it made its way into my body. I lost my footing and felt myself fall to the ground, my face slamming into dirt, rock and moss. I struggled to breathe; coughing and wheezing as I struggled to crawl in the hopes of escaping the poisonous atmosphere. “Try as you might there is no escape,” I heard the cruel mocking voice call out. I looked in the direction of the voice, struggling to lift my head as I saw the shadowed outline of his body begin to form in the dark violet miasma mists. My body could take no more and I fought the darkness as it took over and the there was nothing but the echoes of alarm deep in my mind.   To Be Continued……. Sorry if it seems rushed. I wanted to skip as much of what was seen in the show/manga as possible. Most of us have seen/read it repeatedly so it shouldn’t need repeated again. Thank you for all your reviews and no one has yet to offend me horribly with what they’ve said. You’ve all been kind and thank you for the well wishes for my Mom as well as my self. I’m going to try my hardest to pound out as many chapters for this fic as I can so I can finish it so I can move onto completing other works I have yet to finish. Trying to keep my muse while its here. Today’s chapter is thanks to Akira’s Aoki Tsuki Michite (The Pale Full Moon) which is the ending theme for Kuroshitsuji’s Book of Circus, if you get a chance check out the anime as well as the song and the rest of Akira’s music, she’s gorgeous and has a haunting voice. Well on to chapter 10~! Kat ***** Chapter 10: We’d never be apart ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 10: We’d never be apart   My body ached and my lungs and throat burned as if I had inhaled salt water. I struggled to wake trying to pull myself from the darkness and the more I awoke the more I began to realize I had lost feeling in my arms and what feeling I had was stiff and almost tingly. I finally opened my eyes and saw that we still remained in the miasma corroded forest. The trees were darkened and decaying, their once strong and proud branches becoming gnarled and their once beautiful green leaves were blackened and falling off. I turned my head from left to right seeing that I was being held against such a tree by twisting grotesque roots and branches. I struggled to pull my numb arms free with no success, the miasma affecting my body still, making me weak. My feet and legs were loosely grasped and yet it still did me no good to try to free them from the root prison leaving my legs spread apart. I growled in frustration and struggled once more and then I heard the cruel chuckles of Naraku from somewhere behind me. “Oh, don’t stop. Struggle some more. It is a rather arousing sight and not just for me it seems,” Naraku’s voice oozed confidence and cruelty. I looked up and saw Naraku sitting a few feet above me in my tree prisons branches starring down at me but then a loud snarling growl caught my attention and I looked straight ahead and the miasma cleared away at Naraku’s command and there with feet scrambling and digging ruts into the dirt stood a wild looking and snarling Kouga. I had heard how fearsome and terrifying wolf demons could be and I had seen my fair share in my younger days but seeing one you considered a friend and ally growling and snarling at you with fangs bared was an upsetting and disconcerting sight. Drool crept out from the corners of his open mouth as he bared his fangs at Naraku, snapping and snarling viciously, every now and then turning his attention to me with his nostrils flaring. He continued to struggle in his bonds of gnarled roots pawing and scratching with clawed feet, slowly making progress in my direction as he did so. “Did you know that you are currently exuding quite an appealing scent,” Naraku sang down at me. My eyes widened and I struggled more against my bonds not caring that I was cutting or scraping my wrists in the process. “Oh, do keep struggling, it seems to arouse our little wolf prince. I could end his suffering and let him go. You could become a meal or potential mate…it’s always hard to tell which. I suppose it depends on which hunger is at the forefront,” I could hear the sadistic grin in the tone of his voice. I growled at him, and watched as he vanished from above only to reappear in front of me and just as quickly his hand slapped my cheek leaving a stinging sensation as well as a feeling of a slow tingle that made its way down my cheek. I watched as he lifted the hand that had done the slapping and traced a finger in the cut he had made. He looked down at the blood on his finger and brought it to his mouth and I watched as his tongue darted out and licked away the traces of my blood. I closed my eyes which had been a mistake as I felt his hair across my face like silky spider webs and then he leaned in close to my aching cheek and I felt the warm slimy feeling of his tongue as he licked my cut. I shuddered despite myself and refused to meet his eyes until he grabbed me roughly by my chin and forced me to look up into those cruel beady camellia red eyes. “Perhaps I should partake of this body myself,” he said as he traced his hand down my body opening my hakama as he did so leaving my chest and then my lower body exposed. He stared at me and I closed my eyes as a hundred things ran through my mind, a hundred horrible scenarios. “Have no fear Inu Yasha, you are not my type. You have a beautiful body but you are not Kikyo. It will be a beautiful sight to watch you be humiliated again and again with no way to save yourself,” he grinned cruelly and I watched as Tessaiga appeared a few feet away. “We shall give you a bit of hope because I do so love watching it die in your eyes over and over again until hopefully it will never bloom again inside of you.” As he said that the restraints on Kouga snapped and I watched surprised, as Naraku was knocked a few feet away by Kouga who now stood growling and snapping at Naraku’s face, claws raking across arms that fought to protect his now face which was the perfect picture of shock. Kouga was knocked off but it took only a second for the wolf prince to once again go after Naraku who now held a look of anger and concern. He would vanish from sight but scarcely escaping Kouga’s attacks and it was then I realized that Kouga had shards in his legs still and his speed seemed only to increase as he mercilessly attacked Naraku until finally Naraku relented vanishing into thin air calling out one final message, “Enjoy your victory Inu Yasha, if you survive it.” As he vanished, the miasma only dissipated a little, leaving us surrounded by it still, only in smaller amounts and Kouga still seemed under its spell as he growled and searched the grounds like the predator he was. Upon finding no sign of “the enemy” he then turned those bright feral cerulean eyes my way. I closed my eyes and concentrated on slowing my breathing. I wanted to not be seen as prey. Panicking and fighting would only make his response worse and as he drew close I could smell him and his arousal. I made the mistake of opening my eyes and saw him bare his fangs in warning as he inhaled deeply and knelt down so that all I could see was the top of black hair in its high ponytail. I felt his hands roughly push my legs apart and felt his hands probe my body roughly. A gasp escaped and he looked up at me with an intense stare before returning to his exploration. A finger entered me with no preparation and I gasped and struggled to escape the sudden intrusion and the pain that it caused. He seemed to enjoy my reaction and he added another. My eyes watered from pain as I struggled against the grip he had on my lower legs and the tree limbs and roots that held my arms and hands in place. He moved his fingers in and out roughly a few times before removing them and then I heard the crack of wood as one leg and then the other were freed from their weak bindings. I let a breath of relief escape but it was short lived as my legs were lifted and I felt his bare lower body pressed against my own and then hot flesh was pressed against my sore opening for a mere moment before it was forced deep inside. I choked on a scream and struggled in my bindings which he only seemed to enjoy. He growled as a warning and then pulled out and thrust back in. It was an all too familiar and painful feeling, the humiliation an old and horrid feeling. The tears came unbidden as I felt myself slip away deep inside of my own mind wishing I could be anywhere but in my current predicament. I kept reminding myself that this was my fault, not Kouga’s. We had both been used as pawns; pieces moved around in this sadistic game Naraku has started and that I could hope to end. I was brought out of dark place as the pain suddenly was replaced by pleasure and I opened my eyes upon feeling gentle licks and nips on my lips. He moved his hips in just the right way and pleasure shot through my body and limbs and I wiggled against him unbidden and he plunged his tongue into my now open mouth capturing my gasps of pleasure, as if he were taking pride in his pleasure bringing thrusts. It was as if the Kouga I knew were still there and he was making himself known. I could only hope this wouldn’t ruin what camaraderie we had built up when he awoke and became himself again. I shuddered and felt my completion nearing and no sooner had it crested and came upon me that he buried himself deep inside of me and poured his seed there. I was slammed hard against the tree trunk with his chin on my shoulder pinning me in place just like his lower body pinned itself inside me. He shuddered and my body answered as we became a trembling mess. Until he finally finished his release and still he stayed pinned against me. I waited as I did so; I flexed my right hand and was surprised when it slid from its prison to land on Kouga’s shoulder. I stared at it surprised as I realized my own blood covered it and had made it slick enough for me to slide free. Kouga finally slide himself free of my body and removed his head from shoulder as I slid my other bloody hand and wrist free to rest on his other shoulder. I watched as the light and knowledge filled his eyes so I gently pushed at his hands so that he released my legs and hips so that I stood shakily for a moment before I slid to the ground, gasping as my aching and jarred body reminded me of its many hurts. I waited a moment for my limbs to stop shaking as they regained movement and feeling and then I began to redress myself as slowly and carefully as possible. I was almost done when I heard a pained gasp that almost sounded like a sob. I looked up into Kouga’s eyes and saw the shame, hurt, humiliation and agony over what had happened. I gave him a small watery grin and he seemed more horrified. “Pull yourself together you damned wolf. We can’t let this get to us, if we do he wins. You understand you wimpy wolf.” “How…how can you sit there and pretend? Like it all never happened,” now he seemed to be gaining some of his old pride and indignation. “When something like this happens that’s what you do,” I forced myself into a standing position and carefully dusted myself off as I turned to look into his eyes leaving my grin behind to give him my straight serious face, “If we let this bother us he wins, you get it!? He can’t win, I won’t let him. Yes, it sucks and it hurts and it’s embarrassing but it could have been worse, I could have been raped by Naraku. Would that have made you feel any better? Now, let’s suck it up and instead of groveling in pity and self-loathing lets do something about it. It’s time we take that ass down.” I saw him compose himself and shake his head once and then twice before slapping himself with both hands in the face to pull himself out of his stupor, “You’re right mangy mutt.” It was quiet as I began to walk with him following, making our way out of the clearing miasma and back to the trail where I had left Kagome and the others. Kouga followed a ways behind as if making sure I wouldn’t be attacked again or just making sure I was fine. When we had reached clear and clean forest I turned to face him, “I’ll be fine Kouga. Return to your pack before they start to worry. Besides I’ve been through worse with worse people.” He seemed almost stumped and troubled by what I had said, not reassured but turned back around anyway. I watched for a moment as he slowly walked in the direction of the wolves’ territory and then he picked up speed until he vanished in a leaf and debris filled cyclone. I walked quietly by myself until I made it back to camp. Once there I made up a story about finding Naraku’s trail but no Naraku only lots of demons which had lead to my many wounds. As night fell and Miroku and Shippo talked of going to bathe and taking a dip in a nearby hot spring and when they stood to go I followed. I waited until they had busied themselves with their own cleaning before cleaning my self. I attempted to act as normal as I could as I washed away my own blood and any evidence left of what had happened. Once I was cleaned and smelling less like wolf I carefully sat in the hot spring and soaked my body and soul, washing away the worries and stress along with the aches and pains of my body. As I stared up at the crescent moon I promised myself that Naraku would pay for what he had done. And as I felt the familiar tug of Shippo’s small hand on my dog ears I knew he had more to atone for than just my pain and suffering.   To Be Continued…. YAY!!!! Maybe I can get another chapter done tomorrow. Holy cow I’m on a roll. I promised myself if I could complete two stories I could start typing up my Tales of the Abyss fic. Yup….total fangirl. I also have a Kuroshitsuji fic I want to do and maybe a Karneval fic. If I can keep this momentum I might even do a Saiyuki fic. Well til next time~! Kat ***** Chapter 11: Give yourself to me ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 11: Give yourself to me   It had taken a month to find Naraku and end our long standing battle. To defeat him completely, making certain he wouldn’t return. His defeat had ended so much pain and suffering. Kikyo was fatally wounded by Naraku and I was there in her final moments. We shared a final kiss as her body dissolved into a cluster of bright light and souls. It was bittersweet watching the shinidamachu carrying that cluster into the sky. She was gone but not forgotten. Miroku no longer possessed the wind tunnel and I watched as he and the demon slayer finally allowed themselves what happiness they deserved with each other. I was betting it would less than a year before we had news of an impending child. Sango’s brother Kohaku is living without his shard and is continuing his life’s job of ridding the world of troublesome yokai with Kirara at his side. He did a fine job of protecting Rin during the battle and perhaps a spark was lit between the two. One can only hope because the love between her and Sesshomaru will be one of pain though it seems to me that he only treats her as though she were a daughter. Shippo is living with Kaede in her village, occasionally leaving to train so that he can take the kitsune exam. I think he’ll do just fine; after all…he’s trained with me and the rest of the gang. Rin is also living with Kaede with the hopes that she can once again get used to living with humans. Apparently this was Sesshomaru’s idea. It’s for the best and I am hoping she adapts quickly. She seems to be doing just fine and is a quick learner under Kaede’s tutelage. Kagome and I said our goodbyes. She went back through the well and back to her time to finish her schooling. She says it may be a few years but she will return. We have discussed what is between us and we have decided that we are good friends and there is nothing more. I once thought there was love between us but deep in my heart I know anything we could have would end in heartbreak like most demon, human and hanyou relationships end. Plus I carry a secret that I can bare children and deep down I wonder if I can even father children. I doubt she would truly be happy in a childless relationship and I would only feel guilt and shame if she had to give up the joys along with the sorrows of being a life giver. If she returns I will happily greet her as I always have but deep down I wish her happiness in her time and hope that someone there fills her heart and thinks of nothing but her. Kouga has finally settled down with the wolf princess Ayame and it is said that they have had a mating ceremony already combining the two demon wolf tribes with their wolf packs. Kouga and I still remain friends and nothing has been mentioned of what happened between us. Out of everyone my half brother Sesshomaru seems to have changed the most these past few years. He went from constantly attacking me for merely existing to attacking me to obtain Tessaiga. He eventually left me alone around the same time he saved Rin. He went from this unapproachable being that I teased and barked at to being this calm quiet individual who seemed more interested in observing me. It was unnerving and interesting at the same time. Perhaps obtaining Tenseiga had been the turning point for his behavior but perhaps not since he had Tokijin made. He did seem to mourn for Kagura when she passed; it was interesting to witness it. He has been through as much as I have so I suppose I forgive him for his past transgressions. On the days that I am in the village visiting and he comes to give Rin gifts and check on her I often see him glance my way. He is not embarrassed and seems to stare for long periods of time before finally looking away. I wonder if I’ll ever truly understand him. It has been three months since our new found freedom and peace and I have been spending my days lazily resting in Kaede’s village helping on occasion to earn a meal at Kaede’s or Sango’s table. Most of the time I find myself perched high in a tree branch watching as peaceful clouds float by in sunny skies or the wind blown fields where children play and women and men plant new crops for the coming Fall. It was on one such day as I sat on a sturdy mid-branch of an old maple tree overlooking the village’s fields that I found myself stroking my belly. I had been having cramps quite often lately and a bit of indigestion but nothing too horrible to give me concern but even as I thought it I looked down at my midsection as a thought buried itself deep in my mind and wouldn’t let go. It had been a little over four months since Naraku’s trap and what had happened in the miasma filled forest. I hadn’t developed any nausea or any extreme exhaustion like I had with my last two pregnancies but I had gained a bit in the middle but I also wasn’t as active… The thought nagged at me but I pushed it aside. As night fell I finally left my refuge in the old maples branches and made my way to Kaede’s hut where the smell of rice and miso soup filled the air. As I entered the hut Kaede and Rin both glanced up from their spots; Rin’s at the fire where she was ladling out the miso soup and Kaede’s from a large cushion near the fire. “Just in time InuYasha,” said Rin as she handed me a bowl. I grinned and took my bowl sitting in a corner where I ate as I watched the other two interact. No sooner had Rin finished pouring a fourth bowl finishing off the pot when Shippo came meandering in. He excitedly took his bowl and sat down talking excitedly while he ate about things he had seen and learned during his training sessions. When the soup and rice had been devoured by all Rin began to clear the dishes, taking them outside the hut to rinse them in an already water filled basin thanks to Shippo and a new trick he had learned. With Rin outside and Kaede beginning to work on medicine orders for the next day I became the new target for Shippo’s ramblings. It wasn’t that I minded; it was nice to see him happy and to see his growth. He certainly had grown in size and talent. As he chattered away I watched his nose twitch curiously. He stopped midsentence to sniff loudly and a look of confusion crossed his face. “Your scent has changed InuYasha,” he said aloud. I looked at him stunned and quickly gave myself a quick sniff in a few places but nothing smelled drastically different. “Whatta ya’ talking about Shippo? I don’t smell anything,” I said starring at him. “I dunno. It’s a small change but its there. Weird….. Oh so like I was saying…” and he continued to chatter as what he said hadn’t added another clue to my current condition. The brat really was clueless and this time I was grateful for it. I listened to him ramble until he wore himself out and made himself comfortable near the fire on Kaede’s cushion and fell into a deep sleep. I shook my head and stood up covering him with one of the many spare blankets Kaede kept around, whether for us or other emergencies. He grinned mumbled and snuggled deeper into the cushion. I shook my head and as I stared down at him I found my thoughts full of memories of Shoheiki with his bright baby smile and honey eyes and my hand returned to my midsection. I know that a pup would complicate things. The look on Kouga’s face alone when he found out would be priceless and then I would have to worry about the role he takes in the pups’ life. I would have a lot of explaining to do but I wanted it, I wanted it to be real. Seeing my Shoheiki all grown up had been a proud moment but it was also a painful one; to know that I had to give him up, that he would never know me or would probably not believe I was his parent should I tell him. I wanted to be able to raise my child and teach it all there was to teach. I was broken out of my thoughts by Kaede’s voice, “Bellyache InuYasha?” “Just a bit of indigestion, nothing to worry over,” I answered giving her a grin. I hesitated only a moment as I considered telling her what I had been through and what I was sure was currently residing in my body. She like the old healer from my very first pup would know by touch and prodding whether I carried or not. The fear of rejection and disgust kept me from saying anything and I shook my head and took a deep breath as stretched as Kaede approached me with something in her old gnarled hands. She handed me bundle in her hands and I unfolded it revealing a blanket, “I figured ye would be staying here tonight.” I didn’t disagree and did pretty much the same as Shippo. I watched as Kaede stretched and made her way into the small area that was hers and Rins sleeping area in the small hut and retired for the night. No sooner had Kaede retired that Rin entered carrying clean and dry dishes. She put them all away and then blew out the few candles that were lit and then wished me a quiet “sweet dreams” before disappearing into the dark room. The cooking fire dimmed to almost nothing and I settled myself on the opposite end of Shippo and lay down atop two cushions and cocooned myself in the borrowed blanket, wrapping my arms around my midsection subconsciously. Sleep came quick and was filled with memories and dreams of newborns and pregnancy.   To Be Continued….. THANK YOU for reviewing. You all are really keeping me grounded. Every time I see a review it makes me want to write more. It took me a while to plow through this chapter. My muse is already trying to escape me. I have this story written down in a small spiral notebook but I wrote two possible ways to branch off, so...now to choose the possible path. I guess I’ll just keep typing it up and improving upon it and let the muse choose. Kat ***** Chapter 12: You hold the key ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 12: You hold the key   The hot and muggy days of summer soon gave way to the cooler weather as autumn began to descend upon us. It had been a month since my predicament came to light but so far other than Shippo no one else seemed to notice. I had physically kept myself from laying hands upon my growing belly especially three nights ago when the all too familiar flutter of movement happened. I could not deny my pups existence now, it was as if it were saying “hello” and letting me know that he or she was now a part of me and my life. I managed not to place my hands on my belly at the time but I couldn’t hide the face splitting grin that had developed. It was Kaede and the others who had brought my smile to my attention. I blushed and cleared my throat before telling them that dinner had been especially good that night. I would go off on my own to bathe and avoided being seen without my fire-rat robe which seemed to hide my new girth amazingly well. I had debated about what I would do and in the end I let my stubbornness win out as I made the decision to set off on my own and find a den somewhere either close to the village or somewhere in or around Sesshomaru’s or Kouga’s territories. I started going on short trips to scout for potential dens, coming back to Kaede’s at night where I began to store and stash goods and storable foods. She had given me a corner in her hut and seemed amused that I was “making it my own” with the many things I stashed there. When I hunted on the rare occasion I would bring home the furs or would turn the skin into soft leather. I would sit and watch many of the local villagers in their crafts learning how to make water skeins and even going so far as to watch and help Kaede make pickles. She would often give me a crock with each batch she gave and in return I would bring home fresh deer and boar meat which we would divide into what could be eaten that night or could be given to a neighbor, the rest was given to a friend of Kaede’s who turned it into jerky for us in trade for some of it. That too I stashed away with my pickles and water skeins. Kagome had left behind “water bottles” which I also pilfered to make use of along with a blanket or two Kaede had given me. As my fifth month lead into my sixth my roundness was becoming more apparent so it was then that I searched for a den more intensely. I had found a deep and widened cave in the side of a small hill in a well forested area surrounded by bushes and trees. It was well hidden and just needed some fixing here and there. I started that day by moving rocks by the entrance and widening places near the opening until I made my way further into the cave. I had spent that day and most of the night hollowing out and digging downward until I could easily stand and not hit my head. I then found a comfy corner for the night and curled up, falling quickly asleep. Upon waking the next morning I continued with my construction and when I was satisfied with my digging I then went outside and collected dried grasses and soft mosses. I covered what would become my sleeping and birthing area with the dried grasses and then the mosses. I traveled back to Kaede’s hut that night and after eating a full meal cooked by Rin I curled up in my corner and slept. No one commented or asked questions not that I gave them many chances to. When morning came I devoured the breakfast Rin made and while she and Kaede made their daily rounds to through the village and sometimes beyond I took my leave and returned to my soon to be abode. When I left this morning I took with me a few of the animal hides and furs. I did more rearranging and gathered more grasses and moss so that the cave floor had become somewhat cushioned as well as helping to buffer the cold that was beginning to fall upon the land. With that thought I went to gather more moss and any fallen twigs and dry wood I could find. I made a pile in a corner so that when I got too far a long I could easily pull from it to build a fire. I then constructed a small area that would be a fire pit and cooking area should I need it and near it made a small ventilation area. I started a small fire to make sure it ventilated properly and then went outside to see how noticeable the smoke would be. Small trees atop the little cave hid it well and I decided to gather pine branches and used those to further hide what smoke could be seen and help cover the scent as well. Feeling proud of myself I went to gather more wood until evening began to fall. I fashioned a twig, branch and bush cover for the entrance of my cave so it would not be discovered and then I once again made my way back to Kaede’s hut for the night. When I arrived I scarfed down my dinner but did not escape the questioning stares or questions this time. “Where have ye’ been going everyday InuYasha,” asked Kaede looking me over. I glanced down at myself and noted my enlarged belly was still hidden beneath my firerat robe but I was covered with dirt, mud, sap and pine needles. “Exploring,” I said around a mouthful. “Have you found anything interesting,” asked Rin as she served me another bowl of rice. “Not really, just seeing what I can see,” I lied as I took the bowl and devoured it. My answers seemed to suffice for now so they had their own conversations and I ate until I could eat no more, I thanked them for the meal and collapsed in my corner. The next morning I woke earlier than normal and snuck out before Kaede or Rin had awoken with my arms loaded with furs, blankets and a satchel filled with my dried meat and pickles. I arrived at my cave and began to dig niches and spots inside to store my food and unfolded the furs into a comfortable pile atop dried grass and moss. I lay down to test it and quickly fell asleep. When I awoke it was late afternoon so I decided to go hunting for my meal and stay the night in my little cave. The area surrounding my little cave was teaming with life which meant plenty of sources of food. I managed to catch a fat rabbit which I skinned and ate raw. Carrying this pup seemed to give me a craving for raw meat more than cooked and since I could eat either I went with instinct. I left what I hadn’t eaten for the crows and took the soft rabbit pelt into my cave where it would dry and become of use for the pup when it was born. I slept soundly that night wrapped in furs and two blankets pilfered from Kaede. In the morning the movement of the pup woke me. He or she seemed overly active and I lay there enjoying each kick and movement until a well aimed kick to the bladder forced me out of bed and outside to find a spot to relieve myself. I went hunting again and caught another rabbit. They were fat and juicy and seemed to appease my appetite and that of my pups and the pelts would make nice swaddling for my pup when it arrived. A few days became a week until I once again left my cave to return to Kaede’s hut. It seemed every time I visited she was out so I would take more of my stores and items and return to my cave. I was on my seventh month of carrying, my belly almost visible through my fire rat robe, when I happened to arrive during Sesshomaru’s visit. I had entered the hut and I was so entranced with gathering more blankets and stores that I hadn’t noticed him sitting in the corner waiting for Rin’s return. “What do you intend to do with all of that,” I heard his deep monotone voice ask from behind me. I startled and jumped dropping some of the things in my arms. I turned to face him and saw him raise a brow in question. I tried to think of an answer but none would come and my pup began to kick irritated with the stress and startle itself. I placed a free hand on my stomach to settle it before realizing that was a stupid move. “None of your business idiot,” I growled at him as I picked up what I had dropped and walked past him quickly before taking off in the direction of my cave. I was paranoid and worried he would follow me back to my cave and my instincts were screaming at me to keep it a secret so instead of going straight to my cave I circled the area leaving my scent on various trees and even walked through the nearby stream and on the other side before finally returning to my den. Den…yes, that’s what it was, a den. I only needed a few more things and then it would be perfect. The thought of risking Kaede’s made me nervous but I had left a few pelts there and the pup would need them to be warm plus it was time to harvest the crops I had watched the villagers plant and when I helped they always gave a small share as well as other gifts of thanks and I could use the food as well as extras. I huddled down in my den that night after putting away the items I had retrieved; making sure everything was in its proper place. The next morning before the sun rose I caught some fish by the stream and gathered some dried reeds and took them back to my den. Some ladies in the village had taught me how to weave baskets and the pup would need something to lay in when I couldn’t carry it. I then hid the entrance and made sure I left no trail visible or scent-wise and made my way to Kaede’s village once again. I arrived not long after sunrise and was not surprised to see Kade’s hut crowded with friends and villagers. Sango and Miroku excitedly waved at me and I grinned and gave them a wave back. I kept my distance and was careful to make sure that no one bumped into my expanded waist. We all sat and drank warm tea for a bit before the call to help was given and we gathered around and split into groups. It’s was late in October so the first thing to be harvested was the last crop of rice. We were given sickles to cut the stalks which were gathered up by children who ran back and forth between rows and then taken to women who took care of separating the rice from the stalks. The rice gathered was taken away to began the process of drying. I worked until midday when my back began to ache horribly. I was given a skein of water to drink from which I all but emptied before taking refuge in a nearby trees cooling shade. I only took an hours rest before getting back up and beginning to work again. Together everyone had cleared three fields and gathered a good enough harvest that the village would have extra to sell to nearby villages or towns and even enough to make sake. The town came together that night and prepared a meal fit for royalty which I ate my fill of before retiring to my corner in Kaede’s hut. My rest was short lived thanks to my insistent kicking pup and aching back. By time morning came I was out and helping again to thresh the rice. When the fields had been cleared we moved on to helping dig up sweet potatoes, carrots and taro. Night came quickly as it always did when hard work was done and upon arriving back at Kaede’s I discovered a nice size bag of rice sitting in my corner with a woven basket brimming with all the vegetables I had helped harvest and then others I hadn’t. I tried to settle down for sleep with no luck. Kaede saw my discomfort and called me over to her. I was wary especially when she had me turn around with my back to her. I startled slightly when she placed her hands on my lower back but I soon became soft clay in her hands as she worked all the tension, stress and pain from my lower and upper back. If I had been a cat demon you could have heard me purring a mile away. “Think you can get some sleep now,” she asked and I could hear the grin in her voice. I blushed despite myself and nodded, “Thanks Kaede-baba.” I slept well that night and stayed one more day to help with the harvesting of the many Fall fruits, this years harvest mainly being Nashi pears, chestnuts, apples and persimmons. When evening fell I left for my secret den taking the rice strapped to my back and my vegetable haul in my arms. I once again spent that evening putting everything away in its proper place and then checking the inside and outside of the den to make sure it hadn’t been disturbed while I had been away. I found nothing but the few scents of chipmunks and birds. Feeling all was well I fell asleep atop furs and blankets. I made one last trip to Kaede’s collecting some tea leaves and was happy to discover another basket of goodies in thanks for helping harvest them. I gave Kaede a quick glance and cleared my throat so she would look in my direction. “What is it InuYasha?” “I’m going to be doing some traveling and I’m not sure when I’ll be back around this way so… make sure you take care of yourself and don’t do anything stupid like die,” I ended the last with a scowl in her direction.” She grinned and stood up with her hands behind her back “I would’t give you the satisfaction.” I nodded and left her hut, stopping just outside the village where I jumped into a sturdy high branch and got a last good view of the whole village, mentally noting Kaede’s hut before I took off I the direction of my den.   To Be Continued…. I need to work on two POV stories or chapters; one for Sesshomaru and one for Kouga, Kouga’s will probably be a stand alone fic. I will at some point switch over to their point of view during the next chapter or two. Hopefully I can make it work, if not, single chapter add on it will be. Thanks for all the reviews and I will try to update my Naruto fic and Harry Potter fics sometime soon. So…much to finish in so little time. I’m even. working on this before I head to work every day. Well…off to write more. Kat ***** Chapter12 part2: (Seshhomaru’s POV) ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 12 part 2: You hold the key (Seshhomaru’s POV)   Something was not right, something was off. The hanyou that was my half brother was not acting his usual bright, excitable and moronic self. He smelt odd and had a lingering odor of Naraku’s miasma and even more so of the mangy wolf that often tailed his human priestess. I found it odd and whether curiosity or something else I could’t say but I found myself observing him carefully during the final battle and even more so after. I noted a change in behavior with the mangy wolf and how he behaved around InuYasha, more reserved and careful and not how I recall him acting at all in the past. InuYasha seemed to be unconsciously doing the same towards Kouga, all be it not nearly as noticeable as the mangy wolf seemed to make it. It seemed to almost be a relief to the two of them when the battle ended and they could say their farewells and be on their way and yet they both acted as though there were something unspoken between them but a hesitation to do so. I expected a change in InuYasha after his priestess left but what I expected and what I saw were two different things. I also noted that after Kouga mated the Princess Ayame forming a new tribe and pack InuYasha seemed more able to relax whether he noticed it him self I am unsure of. Visits I made to see Rin were often spent watching him out of the corner of my eye if he caught me I would merely stare at him until he felt uncomfortable and would give me an irritated rebuff and then either leave or turn away so that I could no longer stare at him. His actions were childish, predictable and slightly amused me some of the time. I made sure to visit at least once a month and as I did so I noted that InuYasha had gained weight around his face but had also gained a pinched look just between his eyes and at the corners and he became more guarded for no visible reason than what seemed to be paranoia. The next few visits he is no where to be found and his scent is faint in the Priestess’ hut as well as the surrounding area. As I visited Rin regaled me with tales of her daily life and the new things she had learned and on occasion she would tell me about InuYasha and his weird behavior. Apparently he had taken to eating more than his usual portions and was quick to fall asleep. She confirmed what I had learned for the lack of his scent in the area and informed me that he had gone exploring and often returned covered in dirt and how one time he had returned covered in pine needles. She prattled on about how his back ached and he had even let the old Priestess’ massage the ache from it and how the words “Thank you” had come from him without prodding. And the most interesting thing she said had to do with his sudden interest with resting his hands on his belly when he thought no one was looking and how he now had issues with Indigestion, though Rin thought it had to be from all those years of inhaling food like he had Miroku’s wind tunnel inside his mouth. It was mid-fall when I arrived at the old Priestess’ hut to drop off a winter kimono for Rin and I have seemed to have stumbled upon my brother in what seemed to be a secretive visit. As I sat in my spot against the doorway and watched him gather things from what Rin had called “InuYasha’s corner” he seemed as though he were in another mindset, like that of an insect. He was intent on gathering his things and as I watched I took in his scent noting the soft undertone to his once masculine scent. As I scented him and tried to solve the mystery of the change in it I let my eyes roam over his body and I noted that his ankles were swollen almost painfully so and that his body seemed mostly lean and then there was his fire rat robe which seemed to bellow out more in the middle than it was supposed to. The words tumbled from my mouth without thinking, “What do you intend to do with all of that?” He startled as his ears swiveled in my direction, jumping in place and losing his grip on a few of his stashed items which fell to the floor as he turned to look at me, surprise was the first emotion to cover his face followed by worry and finally an indignant glare. He gave a wince of pain and his right hand which had lost its items went to his midsection revealing that he had indeed gained a larger middle if where his hand rested was any indication. He startled again and quickly removed his hand. “None of your business,” he growled at me as I watched him bend at the knees to pick up everything he had dropped holding on to it tightly as he stalked past me and out of the hut. I listened as he went from a sturdy walk to brisk jog and then the sound of running and then no more. He was protecting something and I was pretty sure it was an unborn pup. It was not uncommon for male demons to carry just like females though I hadn’t heard too much concerning hanyou; not surprising since I had carried a hatred of them for so long that I had tuned out any talk of them. The thought came to my mind, if he was carrying who was the father. Who would InuYasha allow to impregnate him? The scent of Naraku’s miasma on him was one clue. Could the foul hanyou be the cause of his current condition? But there was also the scent of the now mated wolf prince Kouga. It would certainly explain their behavior towards eachother… I was considering going after him but to cause him stress if he was carrying was unwise. I would try to scent him out later for now I would finish what I came here to do, visit Rin. There was plenty of time to go in search of my half brother. If anything, this Sesshomaru was patient.   To Be Continued…. Next, Kouga’s POV~! Hope this answers some of the questions in your reviews. Kat ***** Chapter 12 part 3: (Kouga’s POV) ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 12 part 3: You hold the key (Kouga’s POV)   I thought I was being smart, getting the jump on Naraku where he had chosen to hide out. I could smell him from miles away with his curosive miasma eating away at the nearby plants and trees, killing any insect or small animal that didn’t stay clear. I was a moron. I remember that annoying laugh, so self assured and cocky and then the vines and tree roots wrapping around my legs and arms and holding me in place. I struggled growling and throwing insults as I did so but it did no good and only seemed to put the full smelling hanyou in a better mood. He lifted his head and inhaled seeming to catch a scent, how was beyond me as his foul stench all but stained and covered everything near and far. He grinned then and said that I was just a small part of his plan, that I was a part of trap and that the real guest of honor was coming. The miasma doubled in strength and I felt it fill me. Soon there were no intelligent thoughts on instinct and primal need. I can remember what happened and feeling as though I had no control over myself as it all went down. InuYasha appeared and was trapped the same way I had been except he had been forced against a tree and as he passed out I knew we were doomed but then that thought also quickly vanished as a scent soft and alluring hit my nose. I couldn’t stop the saliva that gathered in my mouth at the smell and then I opened my mouth taking it in along with the miasma and I could taste him, taste the scent of a fertile being ready to be mated. It was unsettling and I couldn’t connect who the scent belonged to, only that I wanted the being with every bit of strength I possessed and god and goddess help the person who got in my way. Then he began to struggle and the scent began to become overwhelming but that stupid narcissistic bastard kept talking. I wanted him to stop and move away from the one who smelled delicious. He looked my way and you could see the look of confusion, fear and anger and it smelled of fear and it was as strong and heady as any well aged sake. I struggled and snarled trying to get to him but my vine shackles kept me stationary. I struggled and dug my feet and claws in deep into the damp soil pushing myself forward bit by bit growling at the other male and potential mate stealer, baring fangs and snarling to make him back down as I struggled to break free. The one with the delicious scent struggled and the scent of fresh blood drifted through the air and I found it even more arousing as I moved inch by inch pawing into the earth under me and moving the vines forward with me at each step. The smelly one slapped our mate and I lunged and growled and fought even harder to go after him. He needed to be taught that he can’t lay a hand on what we claim! The fertile one is ours! His hands and mouth and tongue touching what he had no right to, he did not fight fair so he did not deserve the reward of his body which he now bared. I lunged and finally the wood cracked and gave way and the branches and vines were no more. They no longer held me back as they fell away leaving hands and feet free. I ran and knocked into the smelly hanyou knocking him away from our mate, slamming him into the tree. If he was smart he would stay down and not challenge us but just in case best to make sure so I stood over him and attacked him, scraping and clawing all flesh and cloth I could get in contact with while trying to catch his weak nasty flesh in my jaws. He pushed me back and I ran after him again but the smelly one kept vanishing using tricks. I was infuriated but finally he left and then I was alone with my prize. I turned and sniffed making my way to the fertile one who was held in place but the very same roots and vines that had held me back. His eyes closed and I felt his fear abate some only to return as I stood in front of him inhaling the strong scent of his ripe body. I knelt down at his bared body and pushed his legs apart. His legs splayed I could see his opening was tight and not wet like other willing partners so I slid a finger deep inside causing him to jump and writhe, his body doing all the work of loosening himself up for my entry. When his movements ended I added another and stretched him in further. It is not good to hurt a mate, you want them willing should they be fertile again in the future. I freed his trapped legs and lifted them high as I stood and brought myself and my freed manhood between them. Our hips pushed together and then I was deep inside his hot body. I pushed in and out of him drowning in his pained moans, allowing them urge me on as I took him. His pained moans turned to pleasure and he clenched around me as I moved deeper and faster working to bring us closer to the end. Please the mate, make them comfortable and happy and as I thought it I began to lick and nibble at lips, chin, cheeks and nose; anywhere I could reach and he began to writhe against me. His sounds pleasure telling me he was close. I licked his mouth and then covered it with my own swallowing his loud cries and moans and swallowing them while he writhed and came clenching down on my member as I pushed it the deepest I could go inside of him and had my own release inside his fertile smelling body. Time slowed and I felt myself returning as instinct began to vanish along with the fertile scent. I stilled and waited for my breathing to return to normal. As I waited a wet hand landed on my shoulder and I took that as a cue to remove myself from his body and after I did that I lifted my head from his shoulder to stare into his eyes and his face and I realized then what had just happened, what had happened between us. He freed his other hand and laid it on my shoulder to help steady him self as I let go of his legs and hips and began to back away from him, embarrassed and ashamed of what I had done. I regretted letting go of him too soon as he slid to the ground and hissed in pain. I couldn’t help the sound that escaped my mouth. The shame, anger, hate for myself and what I had done and couldn’t keep myself from doing to him just built up into one sob that escaped. He turned to look at me and gave me a watery smile and I felt even more like an ignorant slime ball. “Pull yourself together you damned wolf. We can’t let this get to us, if we do he wins. You understand you wimpy wolf.” I couldn’t believe him. How did he…how could he pull himself up after what just happened!? “How…how can you sit there and pretend? Like it never happened?” “When something like this happens that’s what you do,” he said as he stood up now fully dressed and dusted himself off. He grinned and looked at me, “If we let this bother us he wins, you get it!? He can’t win, I won’t let him. Yes, it sucks and it hurts and its embarrassing but it could’ve been worse, I could’ve been raped by Naraku. Would that have made you feel any better? Now lets suck it up and instead of groveling in pity and self-loathing lets do something about it. It’s time we take that ass down!” I shook my head at his words and grinned back at him, “You’re right mangy mutt.” It had been a quiet walk and even though where I was supposed to be was in the opposite direction I followed him anyway. I wanted to make sure he was okay. That he would continue to be okay. When we made it to a clearing he turned to face me once more, “I’ll be fine Kouga. Return to your pack before they start to worry. Besides I’ve been through worse with worse people.” I watched as he kept walking and kept just enough distance away that he couldn’t smell me down wind or see me as I continued to follow him back to his pack. Once he seemed okay and with his friends I returned to my own until the final battle. Even as everything was ended and we all were freed he would still cross my mind every so often. He was always at the back of my mind. Little things crossed my memory that left me confused; whether his last words as he walked away or the fact that he had smelled fertile. Of course it wasn’t unusual for male some male demons to carry or birth young but it always seemed like InuYasha was attracted to females and not males. I was mated to Ayame and we had combined our packs and our tribes into one large pack which now gave us a larger territory and more protection against any aggressors. Fall came and with it the news that Ayame would be expecting our first cub. I was excited and somehow InuYasha was still at the back of my mind. Too many things hadn’t seemed right until finally I was spurred into action. I left Ayame in many capable hands and told her I would return as soon as possible. She placed a kiss upon my brow and then one on each cheek and nodded her approval. I left in search of InuYasha with Ginta and Hakaku at my side. The first place we went was the village where he had lived with the old Priestess Kaede but I was surprised to note his scent had all but disappeared from the hut. We stopped and learned from Miroku and Sango that InuYasha had gone “exploring” or that was what he had told them. It was then that we heard interesting things about change in habits and how he seemed to smell funny from the young fox kit Shippo. This just added to my worry. He smelled fertile until our bodies joined and not soon after he had lost that scent. Ayame was going to kill me…and it wasn’t even my fault THIS time. We decided to use the wolves and search the area for his trail and had a hard time finding it and it became even harder as the weather became colder and soon snow began to fall helping to cover his scent when we had finally caught it in an area between my territory and that of Sesshomaru’s. I carefully followed and traced the area with my wolves until a howl of alarm was given. I looked up and saw a powerful white dog demon in the sky. He descended to the ground and stood tall and proud as he looked down at me, “And why is the Prince of the wolves out prowling around in this weather?” His baritone was more growl than rumble in this for but I looked up at him and let my mouth run wild like I usually did, “And one would ask you the same thing Lord Sesshomaru.” It seemed a standoff until one of the wolves sounded off a howl and yip indicating they had found something. I took off in their direction and Sesshomaru followed behind us. We came to a small hillside surrounded by a now frozen stream with a nearby lake and as we all huddled there sniffing trying to scent InuYasha a pained yelp which became a full throated scream sounded followed by the scent of blood. Not just anyone’s blood…InuYasha’s blood. I inhaled and so did Sesshomaru and no sooner did he begin to transform back into his normal demon form that I caught the scent which took me to the small hillside which was covered with snow with no visible entrance but the smell of blood came the strongest at the top and on one side. I hazarded a guess and began to dig at that side along with my wolves until a layer of snow had been removed and then what looked to be a door made of woven pine branches. I pulled it open and crawled in finding that I could stand once I was inside. I heard a pained gasp and then a grunt followed by another scream as I walked forward and found a dimly lit area in which InuYasha knelt with legs splayed a pair of tiny feet dangling between them. He looked straight ahead at me and then turned his head to look beside me as Sesshomaru came to stand beside me. He gasped and struggled to take a deep breath and then howled in pain as the feet emerged more until tiny legs were revealed. “He…hel..p me. Something’s wrong,” he gasped out as he wrapped his arms around his wide midsection. We stood there, Sesshomaru and me as we stared in horrid fascination and surprise at the scene before us.   To Be Continued…. Sorry, next back to InuYasha’s POV and with it the pups’ birth. I’m three pages into it already. So hopefully you all won’t have to wait long. Thanks for reading~! Kat ***** Chapter 13: Now there’s no point ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 13: Now there’s no point   The weather went from cool and crisp breezes to biting cold in less than three weeks. I continued to gather storable food around my den and the surrounding area but went no farther than that. It had now become more than noticeable that I was carrying and I wasn’t too sure there was only one inside my body. My girth was definitely larger than my first and second pups. I suppose my healthy diet and general good health could all be attributing factors as well. I never knew where and when my next meal would come along when I was a young pup carrying my first. Each day was a battle. I was reminded that I hadn’t visited my first pup’s grave since I had placed the head of the demon that had caused his demise upon it. I decided that once I was healed and my newest pup was old enough I would venture to the mountainside where I had buried him. My thoughts were gloomier as the weather got colder but my pup’s movements always reminded me there were happier times to come. Each kick made me more determined to make things better for me and for it. No sooner had I gathered a few skeins of water in preparation that it began to snow. It started off as soft powdery flakes and grew in intensity. I wasn’t bothered by it much and simply spent my days snuggled deep under my furs and blankets mostly sleeping. I’ve found that I had no energy and sleep seemed to call to me. As the snows got heavier a deep ache began in my back followed by on and off contracting pains along my midsection. It was too sporadic to be the definite onset of my labor and so I kept to my cave stretching what I could, pacing to help alleviate it and when it was done I would sleep or eat. This continued until it was no longer sporadic and soon I knew I was in labor. I paced and squatted in the hopes it would hurry it along but a day and night passed with no progress and the pain soon became unbearable. There was no sleep, the pain didn’t allow it. I stripped until only a light inner robe covered my body and even that had been pushed away at my expanded belly because it was still too much clothing. It was past dawn the next morning when the pains had become unbearable and I allowed the pained moans to escape my chapped and bitten lips, each pain was worse than a knife being drawn across my abdomen, a stab after each slice of pain and my back ached so fiercely that I could have mistaken it for claws raking up and down piercing it at the base of my spine. I felt some relief on my hands and knees as I rocked hoping the pup would move with my own movements. I wanted it to be born already. I was positive it only took less than a day for Shoheiki to be born once the onset of pains had begun and less than the morning for my waters to break and yet here I was two days in on my second evening and my waters hadn’t broken and there was no progress only my extreme pain, agitation and worry. I was falling in and out of unconsciousness by the time morning came on the third day. The pain was excruciating but there was finally some give as I felt my waters break. I was so relieved that I didn’t care that I knelt in wet furs. I gathered what strength I could and inhaled deeply as I felt pain build and it hit me like a tidal wave on the shore. A pain that tore a scream from my throat and mouth like none I had ever given before but I bore into it, pushing with all my might with the hope that I would deliver this pup and all would be well in the end. I felt something emerge and fought to keep up the momentum, inhaling and pushing while bearing down into it as it continued to tear into my body. It ended and I sat up on my knees hoping the weight would help push everything down, making it quicker now that I had made some progress. As the next pains crested I inhaled once again and bore into it feeling more liquid gush between my legs and with it that excruciating pain and instead of fighting it I screamed as it engulfed me and pushed with it. As it ended the sound of digging echoed throughout my small den and then light flashed in through the opening momentarily blinding me. There was no moving, I was stuck in this position as I felt the pressure build again as my pup further pushed through my strained entrance. I gasped as the pain descended with the pups downward movement and grunted before screaming into the pain and bearing down with all my might and looking up to find Kouga standing there with snow covering his ebony hair and furs and then Sesshomaru entered and stood beside him. I would have been amused by their looks of shock and surprise but I could feel another pain start to crest. I gasped and struggled to breathe in and then howled in pain and into the pain as it washed over me and I pushed into it hoping it would end but knowing it wouldn’t because something was wrong. It didn’t feel right and what had passed through was not the pups head so I began to panic as I looked up at the two of them. “He…hel..p me. Something’s wrong,” I said as the stabbing pain returned and I wrapped my hands around my midsection as I silently prayed my pup survived. Kouga was the first to move as he came to kneel in front of me. I watched his hands disappear below my waist and felt him gently probe my entrance and I gasped as I felt him tug gently causing the pup to emerge some more. “What are you doing wolf,” asked Sesshomaru as he came closer. “It’s breech,” and at our confused looks he explained further, “The pup somehow either got turned around or just never turned itself. It’s being born legs first. It’s not common but it happens every so often.” The pain enveloped me again and I took a deep breath bearing down and pushing into it as I felt the pressure build and the familiar feeling of burning and tearing began. “Keep pushing, bear down like that. Good,” as I heard Kouga call out instructions I looked down and watched as he gently began to pull a pair of legs towards himself until I could see the lower body and noted the female genitalia. It was a girl, no wonder she had been so troublesome. As one pain ended another began and I inhaled and screamed as I bore into this one with all I had feeling the body emerge and watching as Kouga helped to pull her free. He held her one handed and I watched a look of panic cross his face as his other hand began to delve into my strained and stretched entrance. It hurt but I knew there was a reason behind it, he wouldn’t cause me pain without reason but I couldn’t stop the yelps of pain. I turned to look at Sesshomaru hoping he could explain but his eyesight was transfixed on Kouga and then the pain Kouga was causing ended. “Push, Yahsa! Now bear into it with all your strength!” I did as he commanded and finally felt the pressure disappear and as it did I felt my vision go hazy and I no longer had the strength in my legs to hold myself and I began to fall backwards only to be caught in a strong pair of arms and lowered onto my bed of furs. I fought for breath as I looked up into a pair of golden eyes framed by snow white hair. I lay there struggling to breathe and stay conscious and I fought to listen for sounds of my crying pup and I turned my head so that I could watch Kouga pumping against a tiny chest and then he reached into her small mouth and pulled mucus and liquid from it before turning her in his hands so that her small stomach lay against his palm while he massaged her back while he chanted, “breathe” again and again. He looked almost panicked and then I watched as he lifted her by her feet and raised her so that she were dangling like a fish in his hands and smacked her bottom once and then twice. I watched through tear clouded eyes as finally liquid spewed forth and coughs began and then a deep inhale and finally loud squalling. I cried, tears pouring down my sweat soaked face washing away all my fears and worries and then she was laid on my chest, her small belly on my chest and I laid my hand on her back and gently, albeit clumsily stroked her back to calm her cries. She calmed a bit and her body began to redden up. I stroked her back I looked her over noting her drying black curls and thick black eyelashes. As I stroked her back my hand came to rest on a small furred tail at her plump baby bottom. I grinned and wrapped my arms around her and heard a clearing of the throat. I looked up in time to see my brother glaring over at Kouga. “How is it my brother’s pup is a wolf cub,” he asked glaring at Kouga who was sorting through my pile of dried furs.   I saved Kouga the trouble and answered, “Short version is we were tricked and I’m just glad it was Kouga and not Naraku who fathered my daughter.” My brother seemed momentarily appeased and when Kouga came over with a decent sized fur pelt I gently held out my daughter for him to take her. He did so and wrapped her in her new swaddling and was about to hand her back but I shook my head. My body cramped and I gasped as I struggled to push out the afterbirth from my laying position. Kouga blushed a bit and turned to Sesshomaru, “If you help him kneel he can pass the afterbirth quicker and then I can change his bed furs so he’ll have a dry place to lie.” Sesshomaru knelt beside me and held me under my underarms and helped lift me into a squatting position while I struggled to push. When the cramping finally had subsided and I felt no pressure I was helped off the bed of furs and was lifted bridle style into my brother’s arms. I blushed but said nothing when Kouga handed me my daughter and proceeded to roll up my soiled furs and exit the den with them. Sesshomaru laid me atop the new furs and grabbed one of my pilfered blankets from Kaede’s and laid it atop me my daughter who had already started nursing loud enough that it echoed off the den walls, and already snuggled into my arms as if she were meant to be there all along. Kouga returned and shook snow off of him self before taking a seat a few feet from the bed of furs, Sesshomaru did the same but on the opposite side. I sniffed and smelled Ginta and Hakaku’s scents at the entrance of the cave. I yawned and turned to look at Kouga, “They can guard the entrance from inside where it’s a bit warmer.” He nodded and stood up to go tell them instead of shouting the order. He came back and their smell had gotten stronger, letting me know they were inside safe from the elements. As my daughter finished sucking I lifted her and began patting her on her now dry soft back until a soft burp could be heard and then I snuggled her against me as another yawn overtook me and I soon fought to keep my eyes open. I lost the battle but was happy to as the soft and gentle smell of newborn filled my nostrils and soft intakes of breath filled my hearing and weariness pulled me under into a deep slumber.   To Be Continued… So I am conflicted on names. I did a search and found a few names for snow. The popular one being Yuki but I also found Rikka. I also want a word for Luck in there and words I found for that I like were Myouri and tsuki. So I played around with them a bit and came up with Myorika. I figured I could nickname her Rikka. What do you all think? Any ideas? Kat ***** Chapter 14: In Placing the Blame ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 14: In Placing the Blame   The soft cries and movement woke me from my deep sleep and I inhaled catching the all too familiar scent of soiled garments. I blinked my eyes open and struggled to sit up only to have Kouga at my side putting his hand on my chest halting my movements. He gently lifted our daughter into his arms and walked close to the fire pit where he had already set out furs and what looked to be a slowly steaming bowl of water. I watched from my bed as he lifted her out of her dirty furs and tossed them aside and gently took a clean cloth and proceeded to wipe her down with the water. Her cries became louder at what seemed the unfairness of it all or perhaps just the fact that the parts of her that weren’t being wiped were exposed to the chill of the air. She kicked her little feet which he soon wiped down as well as her small black tail. He gently moved her to and fro as he thoroughly cleaned her and when he was done he lifted her up and grinned at her before wrapping her. Ginta and Hakaku came from the entrance of the cave to see the little noise maker with their tails tucked between their legs as they did so, showing me that they meant no harm. “She definitely looks like you boss,” said Ginta with a small grin. “Ayame is totally going to kill you when she finds out boss,” said Hakaku as he stared down at her noting all her features, “There’s no denying she’s yours.” “She’ll be angry for a bit but she’ll come to understand,” he said as he handed me my daughter. I immediately placed her against my swollen chest watching as she suckled noisily. Kouga stood and took the bowl of dirty water outside the cave allowing a cold blast of air in as he did so. A minute later he entered again, the bowl filled over the top with snow. He dumped the snow into a small pot over the fire and grabbed another cloth placing it in the now clean bowl. As he did that I glanced around the cave noting Sesshomaru was no where to be found. Ginta smiled at me, “Your brother said he would return. Didn’t really say where he was going though.” I nodded and looked down at my daughter and then switched her to my other nipple which she latched onto with vigor. I heard the sound of water being poured and looked up to watch as Kouga poured the melted snow into the bowl. “When this cools you need to be washed,” Kouga said as he turned to look at me. I blushed and nodded, “I have clean robes in the corner next to the pile of furs. There are also cloths set aside...” I blushed harder than I should have as I said the next, “To help contain the bleeding.” “I figured as much,” said Kouga as he approached with the bowl of water which had dried herbs soaking in it. “I know it seems embarrassing but you really don’t have to worry. You’re the first male hanyou I’ve known to carry but there are male demons that carry and birth young, can’t say that I personally know any of them. Your brother might. He didn’t seem surprised that you were carrying either, seemed as though we both had the same idea to go searching for you.” I nodded and removed my little piglet from my chest and wiped away stray milk from her mouth as I placed her against my chest rubbing gently until the release of pent up air happened twice. Kouga held out his hands and I passed her to him and watched as he turned around and called Ginta over. “Watch her for a bit,” he said as handed her over to Ginta. Ginta grinned and went over to the fireplace with her and Hakaku. Kouga leaned over and helped me into a sitting position, “We’re going to need more clean water; I’ll leave it to you, call if you need anything. Ginta and Hakaku are watching the cub so take your time.” He left the bowl with the rag where I could reach and stood up grabbing another of my pilfered bowls before heading outside. I took care to clean thoroughly ridding myself of blood and sweat and had managed to clean the most embarrassing of places before Kouga returned. He began to boil the fresh snow adding more good smelling herbs to the mix as he did so. He replaced the pink tinged water with fresh and returned to help me wash my back and hair. I was still exhausted and even though Kouga had seen my most intimate parts I couldn’t help but blush as he gently scrubbed the places I couldn’t reach. As he did so I couldn’t help but feel jealous of Ayame. She had gained a good mate in Kouga. He would make sure her and any future cubs they had were well cared and provided for. I startled out of my thoughts when his hands stopped moving and he stood up and walked across the cave fetching my clean clothes and with them the absorbent cloths. He left to go dump the dirty water outside leaving me to my dressing and personal care. I was quick at dressing and as I redressed myself I assessed my body and its healing and was happy to note that now I was no longer carrying I was healing at my normal rate. Whenever I carried I seemed to heal just a bit slower, I could only assume that was because my body was trying to keep the pup healthy and ensure its care and safety, though it was not nearly enough to save my first pup. Thinking back on it had brought tears to my eyes for no reason other than I always seemed a bit more sentimental and emotional after birthing. Even though I was hungry I found myself yawning and snuggling back into my bed of furs and blankets. I couldn’t help but stare in the direction of my small daughter almost worriedly and beckoning until finally Ginta stood up and brought her over to me. Her tiny eyes were closed and she too seemed sleepy as she stretched and yawned in her fresh swaddling. I smiled and pulled her against me and under the covers inhaling her scent and in turn putting my own scent on her. I tucked her under my chin and felt myself pulled into sleep with her soft snores and intakes of breath as my lullaby.   Weird visions of pups of all ages running around as I watched them; I noted they all had various shades of moonlight shaded hair, some had straight and others had wavy and all had golden eyes. Girls and boys alike ran around play fighting and chasing and I watched happily as a conversation happened somewhere close. The conversation grew in strength and soon the scenery with the pups faded out and I slowly felt myself wake. I left my eyes closed hoping sleep would return and with it the pleasant dream I had left behind. “He did birth my cub so he should come with me back to the caves. He would have many providers and our daughter could grow up with other cubs from the wolf tribe,” Kouga said in a hushed whisper. “Yes, and I am sure your mate would have no qualms with you bringing home another mate who just so happened to birth a cub by you before her,” I heard Sesshomaru deadpan softly. “Ayame is my mate and that means she is also a leader among our packs, as so she understands that it is my duty to care and provide for a cub I have sired, no matter the circumstances. It is also not unusual for a pack leader to have more than one mate, especially in situations like ours where two packs have been combined,” said Kouga as if his were the only right answer. “She may know all of this but matters of the heart are seldom based on fact and are harder to deal with than you think. Do you truly believe the members of her pack would accept InuYasha without complaint or incident?” “What about you? Do you think you and InuYasha will be able to live together under the same roof? How will InuYasha feel suddenly being asked to move in with you in the home you denied him for so…many years,” Kouga said but there was no true venom in his words just true questioning. Sesshomaru’s and Kouga’s words echoed in my mind as I finally found my self fully awake and debating about interrupting their conversation. “I cannot guess InuYasha’s feelings I can offer what I thinki would be a better living situation for all involved. Besides…your mate is carrying and is pretty close to delivering herself within the next season and stress in such a situation is unwanted,” Sesshomaru commented again. Kouga stayed silent and I could only imagine the turmoil rolling through his mind at this situation so I finally took a deep breath and stretched before pulling my daughter tight against my chest and sitting up, making sure that they heard me as I did so. I saw both of them turn to look at me and felt a heavy dread fill me. I sighed and took a deep breath before speaking, “I appreciate the help both of you have given me but I can raise her on my own. I understand your concern but this not the first time I’ve…” I caught myself and tried again, “I am plenty capable of caring for myself and my daughter.” “And you plan to raise her in a hillside between two territories? Or do you plan to travel with her like you yourself did as a child,” Asked Sesshomaru giving me the weight of his golden eyed stare. “You have no right to judge me Sesshomaru. Not everyone can have the luck or joy of being raised in a palace with everything they need provided for them. I’ve done fine for myself. I’ve survived and been stronger for it. I’ve…I’ve been through things you’ve only imagined and came out stronger for it so don’t either of you go thinking you can make decisions for me.” “You have to remember InuYasha, this is not a male pup, a young girl needs more than traveling from place to place,” Sesshomaru reminded. I could feel the thoughts and worries giving me a headache and with it came the onset of tears from no where. I tried to keep them in forcing my sight to go wobbly as my eyes grew hotter. “We’re not trying to force you into anything InuYasha, we just want you to know that you don’t have to do this alone. I think what Sesshomaru is trying to say is that there is more than one reason he left Rin to grow up with Kaede. I’m going to return to my caves and see how everything is going but I’ll return,” and with that the sound of Kouga standing and leaving filled my ears which swiveled in the direction of the cave entrance. Sesshomaru didn’t say anything at first as he stood up but before he left he softly called back to me, “One day InuYasha we shall talk of your hardships. Neither the wolf prince nor I are stupid, we will have you come clean to us before we part ways no matter the decision and if I must make others pay for their actions I will.” I was left alone in my quiet hillside with my daughter who seemed to sense my tears and started crying herself until it built up into frustrated yowls. I wiped my eyes and rocked her singing softly some childhood song my mother used to sing to me as she quieted down and eventually fell back into a serene slumber. I stared down at her and found my thoughts a horribly confused jumble with no clear answer coming to me no matter how much I wished the perfect one would stand out. I lay down and curled in on myself and my slumbering daughter allowing the occasional tear to escape and fall as I thought of all I had lost and how I would do anything to keep this little one safe and with me until she grew old enough that she left on her own accord. I was not going to willingly give up this precious daughter. And as I thought it I thought to myself how lucky I was that I had choices now that I hadn’t had before. And I let the exhaustion pull me under once again as I hoped an answer would come to me.   To Be Continued…. So… another fic idea came into my head. I’m jotting it down like I did for this one and so far I have at least two chapters worth of writing. It’s a KougaXInuYasha fic. So far the only one of those I’ve officially done is one that leads to SesshomaruXInuYasha. So…we’ll see where the muse leads us. Thank you for reading. More coming soon…. Kat ***** Chapter 15: And you should know ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 15: And you should know   I awoke to the smell of raw meat that seemed to tickle my nose and cause my empty stomach to growl in appreciation. I sat up carefully so as not to disturb my still sleeping daughter. I looked down at her and as I did so I thought to myself that she would need a name. I couldn’t keep thinking of her only as “my daughter” or “my pup”. For now I needed food, next I would think of a name. I sat up and scooted a little ways away from her and looked in the direction of the smell and discovered that Kouga cutting the flesh from what looked to be a deer. I watched as he placed a few thick pieces onto skewers which he then set near the fire to cook. Sesshomaru who stood beside Kouga was drying his hands and after he did so he approached holding a plate of still raw meat. He held it out to me and I looked at it for a moment before taking a piece and putting it into my mouth. I chewed it quickly and reached out for another finding a hunger for the raw meat that I had never had before. I took the plate from him and he backed away a few feet and watched me through thoughtful eyes as I ate piece after piece until there was none left and I was licking my fingers to clean off the excess blood. I was confused by my enjoyment of the raw meat, I had eaten raw meat when I was desperate and needed to eat and when pregnant; which I had assumed was due to the pups needs, but it had been a long time since I had enjoyed it and its taste so much. “You lost a lot of blood and your body is healing and providing for a newborn…raw meat is usually good for a nursing demon,” said Sesshomaru as he looked down at me. I nodded and he held his hand out for the empty plate. I handed it to him only to have him hand me a water skein in its place. I opened it and drank heavily until the skein was empty. He returned with a plate of skewered cooked meat which I also made short work of while watching Kouga prepare more as well as making a pot of rice. Kouga ate some and Sesshomaru seemed to pick at the raw meat and cooked alike, not really eating much. When I had eaten my fill they ate a little more as if waiting for me before both of them fully ate their share. It was kind and the same thing a mate would do if it were their mate they were providing for. I blushed because my thoughts wouldn’t stop thinking of them as more than friends or relatives. I knew what they were and that Kouga was attached but at the same time I also knew him as a mate and father and he was doing a good job of playing the part of a proper mate and my instincts called to him. Sesshomaru was what had my mind and heart racing the most. This gentler side being shown to me was new and invigorating and somehow arousing. I felt embarrassed by this attraction but my inner demon had no such problem. It screamed at me that he would be a great mate and unlike Kouga I would not have to fight for affection or be a second mate, we would be first, come first. My worry stemmed from how he would treat my new pup but I knew he had cared for Rin and I could see potential in him when it came to my daughter. As I looked down at her she began to stir and opened soft blue eyes and began to move those small fists just beginning a fit which I beat her to as I lifted her and brought her to my lips, placing a gentle kiss on her brow which quieted her and then I slid my robe open and brought her to my swollen and just starting to become painful chest. I watched as she latched on and suckled, her small hands coming to rest against my chest, opening and closing and grabbing at my robe. I smiled down at her and played with her darkening black curls and as I did so I noticed one small patch of silver on the right side of her head right before her ear. I wondered if it was a birthmark or just some lucky mark she had gained. She certainly had luck. She probably would not have survived if it wasn’t luck that had brought Kouga and Sesshomaru to us. I looked down at my lucky daughter with her patch of snow colored hair and pale blue eyes and names and ideas flowed through my head. “Myouri…..Tsuki…….no...” not just luck by itself. “Yuki or maybe Rikka,” as I looked down at her I saw so much potential and with it she needed more in a name, perhaps Lucky and snow. “Myoriki…no…Myorika. That’s it! Her name is Myorika, Rikka for short,” I said startling her and causing her to let go of my nipple and stare up at me momentarily before she latched on again. I looked up grinning at Sesshomaru and Kouga and both seemed to staring at me like I was crazy, “What, she needs a name. Can you two come up with better?” Neither said anything and Kouga shook his head, “You went through all the pain and work you can name her.” It was quiet in the cave and I realized Ginta and Hakaku were no longer with us and I looked around sniffing just to make sure. “Where are Ginta and Hakaku,” I asked looking at Kouga who was picking apart the remainder of the deer carcass. “They were told to stay behind and keep an eye on Ayame. She took what I had to tell her well but I do hate leaving her without those I trust while she’s carrying. Besides…I think we have things to discuss. I know you’d rather not but Sesshomaru and I are in agreement that things need to come to light.” I looked over at Sesshomaru almost afraid I would see the look he had on his face. That look of determination that said things weren’t going to stay unsaid and that he and Kouga were willing to wait to hear answers to unsaid questions. “Where do I start? Or should you just ask your questions and I decide what to answer or how to answer,” I asked as Myorika stopped nursing on my now emptied left side and I moved her to my right. She started nursing again and I carefully wiped at plump pale rosy cheeks. “You implied you’ve had a pup before...” Sesshomaru let his sentence hang in the air. I sighed and closed my eyes and instead of looking into theirs as I decided my answer I opened them again and looked into the fire which seemed to separate me from the two of them. “My first pup was the result of rape when I was young, perhaps a year after I lost my mother. It seems so long ago but the memory never goes away. I was young and stupid and had no idea how to care for my self and I was too young to know what sex was or what it lead to let alone how to care for a being growing inside of me.” The memories seemed to play as I stared into the flames and I saw the day I went hunting and remembered the pain of the beating the bear demon gave me and felt an almost emptiness as my eyes grew hot and the flames became wobbly in my vision. “I was stupid and wandered into a Bear demons territory…It felt like the pain and fear would never end as blow after blow fell down on me. He let me live but my pup wasn’t so lucky. That night I crawled back to my small den and delivered my son and that morning I buried him.” It was quiet and I looked down at my little Rikka as she fussed, disliking her salty bath. I wiped at my eyes and cleared my throat as I gently wiped my tears from her soft face. “It wasn’t long after that I happened to run across your path and something in me caused me to start our little battle. I think at that point I was tired of being the victim and perhaps even a small part of me just wanted someone to end it. Someone to not give me pity, someone to end my misery, but no one did and I grew stronger.” I lifted my little girl and gently massaged her back and grinned as she burped causing a little bit of spit-up to come out. I wiped her mouth and continued massaging until no air remained to burp up and then laid her in my lap. “As far as I know my second son still lives. He was a result of my first love, a young priest who was as infatuated with me as I was with him. I knew it wouldn’t work out and so I birthed and raised our son for two years by myself but he seemed to attract demons like moths to a flame so I chose the best path for him I erased his hanyou traits and left him on the doorstep at the very same shrine his father lived and worked at.” I watched the rise and fall of my daughter’s chest as she fought sleep. “Not long after I was awoken by Kagome I sought out that small village and there I found my son. He was older but it was him. His hanyou genes left him looking younger than most his age but it was definitely him because he looked just like his father but his eyes were amber, a few shades darker than ours Sesshomaru,” I said as I looked up and grinned at my brother. I then looked over at Kouga and back to Sesshomaru. I don’t know what I was waiting for but the silence thought brief felt like hours and the den was heavy with it. “We know you want to raise your daughter and we are both are fine with that but it would make us feel better to see you at least somewhat taken care of,” said Kouga breaking the silence. “If you come with me I have promised the Wolf Prince Kouga that you are free to come and go as you like as well and he will be welcomed on our land to visit as often as he likes,” said Sesshomaru with a strong sincerity. “I have talked to Ayame like I said earlier and she said that if you wish to join us in the caves she is fine with that and that your daughter will be raised and respected among our joined packs. Pack politics are a little more complicated but those are things best left for down the road.” I nodded and sat there thinking knowing I had a difficult decision ahead of me. “We’re going to give you some space and time to think this over but we won’t be far. You need only shout and we’ll be there.” With that Kouga lifted what was left of the deer carcass and left the den. Sesshomaru stayed behind a moment longer giving me one of his well known expressionless stares before turning and walking out as well. That night it felt oddly quiet and lonely with just me and Myorika. I slept fitfully and oddly enough so did Myorika; though it was hard to tell if it was for the same reason or if she could feel the nervous energy pouring off of me and she simply reacted to it. This went on for two nights and three days as I contemplated and weighed my options adding pros and cons. The scale seemed oddly tipped in Sesshomaru’s favor. I didn’t dislike the wolf tribe or their caves but I did dislike some of their politics and I was uncertain. The thought of trying to adapt to a new set of rules and behaviors was daunting, not to mention Ayame. I knew what it was like to carry and I didn’t want to cause her stress or become a catalyst between her and Kouga. The two were happy together and I wanted it to stay that way. Sesshomaru seemed quiet and understanding and he was an enemy that I knew and understood to varying degrees. We shared genetics and I saw in Sesshomaru a freedom of sorts and an agreed understanding. I could raise my daughter as I saw fit and she would be free to become her own person without the looming social and possible politics of pack hierarchy impeding her. I doubt Kouga would say we weren’t allowed to come and go but our freedom might be looked down on as a weakness on Kouga’s part which once again tipped the scale in Sesshomaru’s favor. On the morning of the fourth day I fully dressed in my kimono and fire-rat robe and dressed and bundled Myorika after feeding her. I stretched and felt like my old self once again. It was amazing how making a decision makes you nervous but at the same time takes a ton of worry off your shoulders. I ate made and ate was left of the rice I had been given and what I hadn’t eaten I made into onigiri and packed them away in dried leaves. I added pickles and ate some of those as well. I gathered the important things and made my way to the den entrance and cleared my throat calling out, “Kouga! Sesshomaru!” I went back inside and paced. It wasn’t long before both showed up and came inside the den. “I’ve made a decision,” I said and took another deep breath as I worked out how to voice my decision. “I am grateful to the both of you and I weighed all the pros and cons and I have decided that I will go with Sesshomaru.” Kouga grinned and nodded. If he were disappointed he didn’t show it. “I’ll come and visit as often as I can and I can only hope you will visit with Myorika. It would be nice to have both of my cubs play together as they grow,” he said with a grin. I grinned back and nodded, “So shall we go today or should we wait,” I asked looking to Sesshomaru. “You are packed and ready I am assuming,” he said as he looked around the den noting my small packed possessions. “I am.” I grabbed a thin blanket and used it as a carrier, wrapping it around my body securely under my fire-rat robe before picking up my wrapped daughter and securing her in the cloth carrier and making sure I bundled up in furs. Sesshomaru grabbed my small bundle of belongings and Kouga did me the favor of putting out the fire and we all left the den. I turned around and looked it over and remembered all the work that had gone into it and how it had done a fine job as a den. “Before you two head off to the western lands you should really stop in and see the old priestess and your other friends. They were kind of worried. And I’m pretty sure Rin would be happy to see you Sesshomaru and meet Myorika, InuYasha.” As he said that he walked over and pulled my furs aside to take one last look at our daughter. He leaned over and placed a quick kiss on her forehead and then covered her back up and moved my clothes and furs back into place. He was blushing as he turned and started walking away calling over his shoulder, “Take care of yourself and our precious daughter InuYasha.” And then he was gone, taking off in the already melting snow. We turned back around and began or trek through the forest. I followed him more than lead as we went from walking to doing short jumps through the trees, careful of the snow and ice that remained as we did so. We reached the village rather quickly and I followed behind Sesshomaru, nervous at showing my friends and comrades my secret. We passed the hut that belonged to Miroku and Sango, as we passed Sesshomaru paused to turn around just in time to see the hut door open. Miroku walked out followed by Sango and Rin. “Sesshomaru-sama~!! InuYahsa! Kaede-sama’s been worried about you InuYasha. You are going to visit her right,” Rin asked she bounded up to me grinning widely. I nodded and blushed answering gruffly, “Why else would I be here?” We all walked together on the way to Kaede’s hut, Rin chatted energetically to Sesshomaru and I talked with Miroku and Sango. “I hear you two are starting a family,” I asked grinning. “Yes, Sango should be due sometime in the summer,” said Miroku grinning widely. Sango nodded and placed her hand on her slightly noticeable bulge. We came to Kaede’s hut and Rin held open the door as well all piled through including Sesshomaru. “Well I’ll be it’s been a while since my hut has been this full. Oh, is that InuYasha? Finally returned since you’ve caused us all worry I see. Well come and have some tea. Sit and get comfortable.” “Yeah InuYasha, you had everyone worried,” said Shippo with a big grin. Kaede started a pot of water on the fire and went to grab tea cups with Rin’s assistance. Sango and Miroku took seats while Sesshomaru hung back in a corner by the door and nodded at me to get comfortable. I sighed and began to pull off the furs I wore and then opened my fire-rat exposing the cloth carrier wrapped around my middle. As I knelt down I got plenty of odd stares which only grew as I moved into a full sitting position jostling Myorika who began fussing and then crying. I pulled her from her swaddling furs and held her in my arms and proceeded to rock and comfort her. “So that would be the reason you left,” asked Kaede as she brought the pot of hot water over and poured in the tea leaves, letting them steep. “This is Myorika, my daughter,” I said as I looked up at the curious faces that now surrounded me. “She’s pretty InuYasha,” exclaimed Shippo. “No flirting with her brat. She’s only going on two weeks old,” I said with a grin. “And where is her father,” asked Kaede. “He’s headed back to the wolf tribe in the mountains where he belongs,” answered Sesshomaru from his corner. At the confused looks I told a short version of what happened as Kaede served tea and treats and they filled me in on what I had missed. Myorika was passed around and held by all present and she seemed to not care until she needed changed. Sango and Miroku did that dirty deed for me, Sango volunteering Miroku saying he would need practice. It was nice to feel accepted and why I thought I would be anything but is beyond me. After her change Myorika became extremely fussy to the point of tears and as she cried I and everyone else became panicked while I simply held my hands out for her. Sango handed her over and I opened my robe bringing her to my chest. I blushed as everyone stared at me and my nursing daughter. “Can’t birth her and expect her to find her own food. Have to have a way to feed her,” I said blushing. The fun and chatter seemed to slow and then Miroku and Sango said their goodbyes and left. I stood and rewrapped my daughter and placed her into her carrier, and redressed myself. As I bundled up and put my furs back on Kaede stood up to walk us towards the door. “Where will you go now InuYasha,” she asked curiously. “Sesshomaru is taking us in. It’ll be safer for us if she is raised there. We will visit. I promised Kouga we would visit him and your place is in-between the two so we will be back. I’m placing my bet now that Sango has twins.” Kaede grinned, “That’s a given. She’s much too bug to be so early in the pregnancy.” “Well then I’ll be back Kaede-baba. Take care of yourself til then.” No sooner had we left that Sesshomaru whistled and his chariot pulled by Ah and Un landed a few feet in front of us. Sesshomaru gestured for me to get on and as I did he stepped up behind me securing me between his two arms as we took off. We flew until I could see the castle below us and then Ah Un descended into a courtyard. I was amazed to see not only Jaken come out to greet us but a few others as well. “Welcome home my lord,” said a tall guard in armor with long black hair in a braid. “Thank you Kurokami, this is the brother I have spoken of. I will take him to his quarters and then meet you in the meeting room later tonight once I see he is properly settled in.” Kurokami nodded and bowed in my direction, “Pleased to meet you InuYasha-sama. I hope you enjoy your stay here. I am sure your brother will see to all needs but should you need anything feel free to call on me as well.” I blushed and nodded, “Just InuYasha is fine and Thank you.” We entered the castle and as we did so I felt that I was entering a new world and with it a new life. I followed Sesshomaru through the halls until we came to a set of stairs built of stone. He walked up them and I followed carefully behind him. We reached the top and walked to the end of another hallway finally stopping at the very end. He opened the door and walked inside. I followed behind him and entered into a lavish room with tables and chairs and dressing tables. It led further into a room hidden by silk screens and lead to a large plush bed raised a few feet from the floor covered with red covers and quilts. “This is your room. For tonight I will send your food upstairs so you and Myorika can settle in. Take your time and get used to things. In the morning I shall introduce you to your personal servants and then I shall show you around but for tonight enjoy and explore your room. My room is connected to yours by a door. Knock or enter if you need me. I must meet with Kurokami to make sure everything has been running smoothly. My mother usually runs things while I am away but she tends to be a bit slack on some things, until tomorrow.” He left saying more than I had heard him say in the many years I had known him. I lowered my raised eyebrows and uncovered myself until I was in my fire-rat robe once again; leaving my furs on a chair with the ones my daughter was wrapped in. I unbundled her and laid her on the plush bed as I explored the room, taking in each sight and smell. Dinner was brought to us by a young rabbit youkai clad in a pink serving kimono with ruffly apron. She was adorable and nervous. She had long white hair kept in braided pig tails and two long white rabbit ears atop her head. Her eyes were pale pink with dark red irises. She bowed after leaving a tray of food and quickly made her exit. She seemed young but most youkai and hanyou’s did. I dug into my dinner of pork, rice and miso soup and followed it down with warm lavender tea. I cleaned my hands in the water basin by the dressing table and then dressed down to my inner robe. I made sure Myorika was cleaned and made sure she was full before lying down and pulling her against me under our warm covers and falling into a quick sleep. To Be Continued…. Trying to finish this story up but I feel a sequel might be necessary. We’ll see. Wrote this while having an America’s Got Talent marathon, yeah, I was far behind… So enjoy this chapter. More to come soon~! Kat ***** Chapter 16: I suffer the same ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 16: I suffer the same   My first night in the western lands and inside a lavish castle was different from everything I had ever known. I had slept in longer than I usually did and so did Myorika, whether it was the plush bed which seemed to swallow one in the comfort of its fabric and stuffing or the very fact that I was exhausted from the many restless nights before I made my decision or perhaps even the stress of revealing my daughter to my friends that lead to my exhaustion and over sleeping. It was probably all of the above. As I stirred I woke Myorika who began kicking and fussing letting me know that her cloths were dirtied and that she was also hungry. I looked around the room until I found the bound satchel Sesshomaru had carried for me. I untied the contents finding extra changing cloths as well as clean swaddling and small furs I had cut for Myorika. I removed her soiled clothes and had to use rags dipped in the cold water from the basin which I warmed using my hands to wipe her bottom. At this she cried louder voicing her displeasure. I dried her bottom and wrapped it in a new cloth. I was searching for something to dress her in when a knock sounded at the door. “Come in,” I shouted as I lifted Myorika into my arms rocking her to calm her unhappiness. In came the small Rabbit Youkai followed by another who was the color opposite of the pink eyed girl. She had black ears and long flowing black hair also kept in braided pigtails. Her eyes were a deep violet with black irises. She wore a violet serving kimono also with a white ruffled apron. Where her pink friend seemed nervous and quiet this one held confidence and smiled brightly. “We bring gifts from Sesshomaru-Sama, InuYasha-Sama,” she said brightly as she held out a large paper wrapped package in her hands followed in suit by her nervous partner who held out a smaller paper wrapped package. “Thank you, can you set them on the bed,” I asked as I rocked a now calming Myorika. “Yes, InuYasha-sama,” she said cheerfully and energetically as she placed the package on the bed and came to stand by me as she eagerly glanced at Myorika in my arms. “Is this the young princess that Sesshomaru-sama told us about,” she asked as her eyes roamed over my daughter. “Yes, this is Myorika. And you are…” “Oh! Many apologies InuYasha-sama! I am Murasaki and this is my cousin Bara,” she said as she pointed back at the shyer pink clad girl who had come closer with her cousin to catch a glance at Myorika. “We are your personal maids and servants. Sesshomaru-sama says I talk too much to be of much service to him and my cousin too little. He hopes that the two of us will be enough for you and Princess Myorika, InuYasha-sama,” she said giving and bow with her hands together and hidden in her sleeves, Murasaki followed suit. “He apologizes sincerely for his not being able to introduce us but it seems affairs of state and local youkai politics have to take precedence,” she recited with a small frown. Myorika shivered and I searched the room for something to dress her in and then the small package Bara held was presented once again to me. Bara blushed as she softly spoke, “It’s an outfit for the young princess. Sesshomaru-sama had us pick it out for you.” I grinned and laid Myorika back on the bed as I reached for it, “Thank you Bara. You two can drop the sama, just InuYasha is fine.” I took the package and opened it finding a small pale pink kimono robe used for newborns and infants. I could feel a tingle in my chest at seeing such a thoughtful gift and my cheeks warmed just a bit as I picked it and held it up for closer inspection. “Isn’t it adorable!? There are a few the seamstress had begun working on for the little princess but this was Bara’s favorite so we took this one first, plus the others still needed work. As soon as the others are finished we will bring them,” said Murasaki energetically. “May I open yours InuYasha-sama,” asked Bara shyly. “Yes, go ahead,” I said with a smile. She opened the larger package revealing a three piece kimono set in shades of red, white and deep blue that were neatly folded. “The seamstress made it with you in mind InuYasha-sama. She said this will match your coloring very well. She and her assistants are still working on other sets for you.” I grinned widely at Bara, “Those are the most words I’ve heard you say since I’ve met you.” She blushed and nervously wrung her hands, “I apologi….” “No apologies needed Bara; I was just amused is all. Like I said, you can drop the sama I’m just InuYasha but if you truly feel more comfortable using sama then who am I to judge.” “We have a tub sitting outside. We were asked by Sesshomaru-sama to bring it and fill it with warm water so that you and the little princess can bathe,” said Murasaki who was almost bouncing in place. I blinked and shrugged deciding I wouldn’t say no to being cleaned in a way that didn’t involve another persons help, “Sure bring it in. Is there any food outside my door too? I’m kind of hungry.” “It’s in your sitting area,” said Murasaki as she turned and lead the way. At the small table sat a small tray that held a bowl of rice, sardines, a raw egg and tea. I sat holding Myorika one handed and ate a few sardines until Bara saw my plight and brought me a long sash so that I could make a sling out of it. I handed Bara Myorika and quickly made the sling. As I went to take her back I noted Bara’s large smile and noted how gently she held Myorika and filed it away for future use. It would be nice to have a babysitter when my hands were full or I needed a break as Myorika got older. I opened my robe and placed Myorika to my chest so she could have her breakfast while I had my own. While I ate I watched as Murasaki entered followed by two male youkai servants dressed in white robes carried a large wooden tub into my bedroom. I had finished my sardines and had just cracked my egg into my white rice when Bara entered carrying two steaming buckets of water and Murasaki and the two youkai left and returned carrying two buckets each. It became a back and forth pattern as I ate my rice and drank my tea. When I had finished I moved Myorika to my other nipple as Murasaki stood in front of me grinning with two large drying cloths in her small hands. “The tub is filled InuYasha, Bara left a basket of oils and soaps and I shall leave your drying cloths. Please enjoy your bath,” with that she left the room with the quiet Bara following behind. I stood and as I did so my little daughter fussed letting me know she was done eating so I lifted her up and patted her back allowing the trapped air to escape. I undid the little bundling cloths around her small body and cloths around her bottom and knelt in front of the tub and found it had already had some scented oils poured into it. I sniffed and took in the calming scent of lavender and smiled as I dipped a rag into the fragrant water and wrung it so it was damp but not dripping and proceeded to gently wash my squirming daughter who seemed a bit more enthused at the warm water than she had this mornings quick cold wash. I cleaned her from head to toe and dried her with one of the cloths before I smiled and leaned over and began to dress Myorika in her tiny pink outfit and when I was done I couldn’t help but grin as I lifted her and got the full view of her in her new pink kimono. I snuggled her close and took in her scent and feel once more. I made a nest out of pillows and blankets so that she would safely lie in the center of the bed and undressed myself, stepping into the warm water sighing happily as I felt any tension and stress left dissipate. I stretched out as much as I could as and closed my eyes, just relaxing and enjoying my brief moment of peace. I did that until the water went down a few degrees and then I sat up fully and scrubbed myself with a clean rag and one of the citrus scented soaps provided me. I rinsed the lather off and then soaped up my hair and gave it a good scrub. Once my hair was rinsed I found my drying cloth and stood wrapping it around my body noting one or two stretch marks as my belly once again flattened and my abs reappeared, I am amazed at how my body seemed to heal itself after each birth. I patted myself dry as I approached the bed and saw that Myorika lay staring at the ceiling kicking and moving her small arms and legs excitedly. I grinned down at her and removed my drying cloth and quickly dressed myself in my new hakama and haori. I looked at my dirty fire-rat robe as I picked it up and folded it. I placed it in a safe place in the closet near my bed. Now that I was dressed I checked the fully stocked dressing table and found a new brush. I sighed as I looked at myself in the mirror and drug the brush through my hair as best I could. Soon my locks were tamed and I had just grabbed my sling cloth and wrapped it around my body when a knock sounded and Murasaki came bounding in followed by a more subdued Bara. “Lord Sesshomaru-sama has asked us to show you the way to the downstairs library. It’s where he does most of his work,” she whispered the last bit as if it were a big secret. I grinned and picked up Myorika and placed her in her sling before motioning to the door, “Well let’s not keep him waiting.” I followed them noting each hallway, doorway, staircase and the things that surrounded them. It was always good to note ones surroundings. Water color paintings adorned some of the walls with an occasional piece of old armor, polished so it almost looked new but the smell said otherwise. Some hallways had polished wooden tables that had vases which held what seasonal plants and flowers could be found giving the whole place a wildflower field type of smell. We came to a large set of doors which seemed to leak the smell of paper old and new as well as ink and a dusty scent that not even thorough cleaning would get rid of. In the middle of those scents was that of Sesshomaru. His scent was that of a deep musk of cedar and pine with an almost lemon or citrus scent mixed in. Murasaki knocked loudly on the door and cleared her throat calling out, “I have brought InuYasha-sama and his daughter Myorika-hime.” Hime, princess…it seemed as though her title would stick with her which gave me hope for her I don’t know why I seemed so surprised. She was the daughter of a Wolf Prince and niece to the Lord of Western Lands. I probably would have gotten lost in my thoughts but one of the large doors opened revealing a cavernous room with wall to wall books and scrolls and there at the door stood a large muscled youkai who smelled of something wild but dog- like that I could not place. His skin was a deep tan and his eyes were a hazel bordering more on deep ochre. He had large canines and his black hair was shaved close around his face and sides but left long in the back where it flowed past his broad shoulders. “It’s rude to stare little lord,” he said in a deep baritone with a grin that showed off those large fangs. I blinked up at him and took a deep sniff just to show his words hadn’t phased me as I walked past him and into the library and towards the brightest part which is where Sesshomaru sat, behind a large cedar desk surrounded by scrolls and fresh paper as well as brushes and ink. “Good afternoon InuYasha-sama. Good to see you still live,” said Kurokami in a jovial tone as he grinned down at me. I wasn’t the shortest in the room thanks to Jaken, Murasaki and Bara but I sure felt it when surrounded by all these tall intimidating youkai. I felt like I had made a mistake in entering this room without knowing what I was getting myself into but I trusted the girls and Sesshomaru, I just hoped it was trust well placed. I held my head high and looked around me showing very little emotion as I did so, making sure I kept arrogance wrapped around me in case anyone thought I was anything but able bodied and capable of more than what my small body showed. “So this is the brother who battled Naraku and won? I expected more from the hero of Japan,” said the arrogant youkai who had been guarding the door as he approached us. Sesshomaru said nothing, and he was wise not to. I could tell that he was testing me, that he wanted me to prove my worth or maybe he was just an ass. I wasn’t about to let him get to me either way. I had dealt with bigger and tougher youkai than him and he wasn’t putting off any extreme danger signs. “As we all know, size doesn’t matter,” I said as I looked over the strange smelling male again, “and you might want to take a bath your odor is fowling up the air.” I watched his eyes and they still held that mischievous glint to them not even hinting at being insulted. I heard coughs and clearing of throats and looked over noting three more men, two were similar height and had long bright silver hair with black ends hanging over their shoulders in many hair ties keeping it bound and out of the way and large gray eyes which were filled with laughter and surprise. They bother wore black and gray hakama and haori with silver armor a shade or two darker than their hair. They smelled dog-like as well and I struggled to figure out what they were. The third man was a few inches taller than myself and had cream colored and black hair which was spiked and stood up and out like the fur on an angry cat whose overly large brown eyes were almond shaped and set in plump effeminate cheeks. He wore no armor but stood there in a crisp and clean white and faded sky blue hakama set with varying degrees of blue fading in and out among the snow pattern at the right shoulder and bottom hem of his robe. “Let me start the introductions,” said Sesshomaru as he finally stood interrupting any further awkward interactions between us all. “You’ve already met Kurokami; he is captain of my guards.” Kurokami bowed, and gave me a smile which seemed reflected in his deep ebony eyes. “I am Hibine of the Jackal tribe,” said the annoying youkai from the door who came up beside me. “Hibine is a friend from my youth who stops in every now and then to deliver news from his many travels,” and as Sesshomaru said it I understood why his smell was so unnerving to me now, it was foreign. I also hoped he would go traveling again soon. Sesshomaru then lifted his hand in the direction of the two silver locked males, “Gindaiichi and Gindaini are in charge of treasury and accounting. They are distant cousins on my mother’s side.” They bowed at the same time and I realized telling the two of them apart was going to be very trying and tiring. I sighed and felt a hand on my forehead. I startled and looked up into those big brown almond eyes. He looked into my eyes and then down into the sling. “May I see her,” he asked in a very soft and clinical voice that ended on a purr. I looked up at Sesshomaru who nodded while the others watched on either amused or curious as I lifted Myorika from her sling and held her in my arms so that he could look her over. He pressed his hand to her forehead like he had mine and then looked at her eyes and gently caressed her plump cheeks and checked her small pointed ears. She put up with it well even allowing him to check her arms and hands but drew the line when he brought her legs and feet out into the cold so he could check them over and even gently prodded her tail. She went from soft frustrated whines to full on crying. He nodded and looked up at me letting me know he was done and I quickly brought Rikka close to my chest and rocked her soothing her cries, making sure she was rewrapped and warm as I did so. Her cries slowed and then ended altogether. “All is well with the pup, though I would suggest you keep an eye on your new mate. He has a mild fever though it could be stress induced,” he concluded once again ending with a small purr. “Thank you Hayaime,” my brother’s stare settled on me for a few moments of silence. “Hayaime is our healer and from the wildcat tribe. He has been with our family for a few years now and has done well caring for everyone within the castle walls,” Sesshomaru said as he came out from behind his desk and pushed in his chair. He approached me and the others who had been close to his desk followed behind. “You all are dismissed for today,” and as he said it I watched as the annoying jackal waved bye and left out the door followed by the brothers who bowed in my direction and left. “Do take care of yourself InuYasha-sama, I do hate unnecessary work,” said Hayaime looking me in the eye and then turning to look up at Sesshomaru, “And please make sure to not overstress him Sesshomaru-sama. He is still recovering and stress does no good for him or the young princess.” With that he left the room and oddly enough I watched as Kurokami followed behind with his eyes pinned to Hayaime’s twitching tail. “You seem to attract and employ some odd characters,” I said as I returned Myorika to her sling against my chest. “You have no room to talk brother, I do believe to you traveled with a priestess, a demon slayer and her pet, a cursed monk and a kitsune.” I shrugged, “Must be a family trait. I wonder what weird friends Dad had.” At that he shrugged and led me down the hall. We walked down halls and passed many doorways. He pointed out the dining room and we did a walk through the kitchens passing many youkai staff fast at work in them preparing tonight’s meal and then showed me some of the storage areas where we kept dried goods such as rice and grains, pickles and jerky and to the area where many fine wines and sake stayed until used. He took me to the back portion of the castle and showed me porches that led outside and into gardens covered in melting snow and thawing koi ponds with small sculpted trees. We walked and I listened to him talk taking peace in his words as he kindly showed me around. Just as our tour had ended my stomach began to growl loudly and we went into the dining room. No sooner had he shown me my seat and sat down at his own next to mine at the head of the table that the food was brought out. We dined on soup and then fresh meat. Mine was cooked just enough that blood was mixed in with juices while others in attendance such as Hayaime, the brothers and Kurokami all ate theirs raw. All of them partook of the sake heartily while I only had a small cup full. As night came and dinner ended we socialized for a bit with everyone around the large oak dining table until I grew tired and Myorika grew fussy, ready for her own dinner. Sesshomaru escorted us back to our room and oddly enough wished us sweet dreams as he left. I fed Myorika and made sure her cloths were changed and changed her into a sleeping robe that Murasaki or Bara had set out for her. Once she was changed I changed into my own set of sleeping robes and lay down in bed with Myorika snuggled against me. I listened as her soft breathing evened out in slumber and then closed my eyes. This became habit and it became the usual as Sesshomaru’s home became ours.   To Be Continued…. More to come! I’m trying to really finish this story so I can start on the next story to be finished. Thank you for all the reviews. Now I can rest a bit and continue with Season 4 of Walking Dead….. yup…. My fandoms are that random. Kat ***** Chapter 17: If I lose you ***** Title: Frozen Author: DeityOfDeath Archive: Yes please... Pairings: Inu Yasha/ various, Inu Yasha/Sesshomaru, Inu Yasha/Kouga mentions of Inu Yasha/Kagome and Inu Yasha/ Kikyo Category: Drama, romance, slash, Mpreg, yaoi rating: NC-17/R Spoilers: Most likely. Warnings: Yaoi, Lemon, Non-con, Mpreg, Incest, SPOILERS! Disclaimers: I never have nor will I ever own Inu Yasha or its chars. They are property of Rumiko Takashi and major companies. Note from Author: Thank You for reading and supporting fan fiction! Enjoy and please review! The chapter titles are lyrics from the song "Frozen” by Madonna   Chapter 17: If I lose you   Three months went by quickly for us in our new home and it seemed a blur as winter became spring. Myorika can now fully hold her head up and give actual smiles. She does little pushups and can easily roll herself over on her own. She is quite a grabber and goes for hair no matter her target we all react with gentleness, encouraging her new found skill, even Sesshomaru. She babbles incessantly more so than her brother ever had. She seems intent on getting her point across. I was amused by Sesshomaru’s antics as much as Myorika’s. He made time to be with us whether to have brunch or to take a break from work to come sit down with us on a blanket in the castle gardens where we partake of the warm sunshine quite often. He seems silently interested in my small daughter and watches almost intently as I do. “Do you plan to visit the Wolf prince anytime soon,” he asked from his spot beside me, watching as Myorika flailed her tiny fists as she lay on her belly on the blanket. “I was thinking about it. I was thinking a small journey would be nice,” I said pushing my hair away from face where the wind had blown it. He looked up at that and at me, “Journey?” I watched my daughter with her thickening patch of black hair so much like her older brothers except for that odd white patch, “Yeah…remember I told you about my first son? I was thinking I should stop and see his grave before I take Myorika for a visit with Kouga and after we can visit Kaede and then we can return home.” “I would like to accompany you,” he said instead of asking. I knew my brother well enough to know that even if I hadn’t planned on him coming with me that he would more than likely have followed me anyway. “I had planned on it,” I deadpanned, “besides…you can get Rin a new kimono on the way and use escorting me as a reason to escape your duties that you have amassed now that you have settled at home once again.” He nodded, “I should tell my mother so that she can once again care for the castle and all who dwell within it. She has been asking about you, shall we set up a private meeting or would you prefer something larger, like a dinner gathering,” he asked finally turning to look me in the eye. My heart skipped a beat and my chest felt tight but I couldn’t thoroughly explain why. His eyes were so much like my own and yet so different and they seemed to pull me into their honeyed depths. I looked away first and back at Myorika as she wiggled on her blanket, “We don’t have to rush. I would like to wait a few months until Rikka is a little older, maybe in three months time; just as summer begins.” “That is acceptable. We will discuss this further on another day then.” With that he stood and dusted himself off causing his scent to fill my nose. I inhaled deeply and blushed as I did so as a feeling of indecency came over me. As he walked by he placed a hand against my cheek, I looked up shocked and he gave me that emotionless stare. “You shouldn’t stay outside too much longer, you seem to be flushed.” With that he removed his hand and walked back into the castle leaving his scent wafting behind him along with my troubled thoughts. “You shouldn’t fight it you know,” said that all too familiar voice with its purr. I startled from my thoughts as Hayaime came to stand next to me with his hands tucked away in his robe. “You do know that demons mate siblings all the time and that Sesshomaru-sama has already made it clear to many in the castle that you are off limits,” he said with as much tact as a cat could. I almost expected him to stop and start grooming himself while I watched. “He is just looking after mine and Myorika’s well being,” I said trying to pretend my cheeks weren’t still flushed. “Tell yourself what you must InuYasha, I do no fault you your pride or your human upbringing but know that you should not deny your demon half just like you do not deny your human half. They are both parts of you and yet you constantly hide behind your human teachings and behaviors. I am informing you so have no excuses in the future.” Myorika began fussing and I stood up and lifted her from the blanket rocking her gently to calm her. “It is wrong for you to deny yourself happiness and I will not allow you to deny Sesshomaru-sama the happiness you have so graciously given him a view of,” and with that he walked away leaving me once again to my thoughts with my fussy daughter.   Another month went by with what Hayaime had said floating in my mind. Every tender touch, sweet word and kind action was noticed. Sesshomaru had certainly become touchier than I had ever known him to be; with a pat on the shoulder, a hand on the back, a small caress on my cheek and a hand occasionally on mine. I tried not to be self-conscious of it and if Sesshomaru noticed he said nothing and acted no differently. Myorika seemed to recognize his voice and even stopped crying if she sensed his presence in the room. She was developing quickly and already had a great sense of smell and presence. Her behavior often alerted me of who was coming into the room even if I didn’t take a sniff or look. I myself have settled in to routine of caring for Myorika and when she is outside on her blanket learning to crawl and move I practice a few feet away from her, strengthening muscles and training myself. Every so often Sesshomaru comes to watch and sometimes he offers to spar with me while Murasaki and Bara watch over Rikka. Kurokami has also sparred with me once or twice and he is powerful and strong but also gentler than Sesshomaru but he is a good instructor. By the time Myorika’s fifth month had come I was training more and had even asked Murasaki and Bara’s help in watching my little daughter while I sparred in the garden on the nicer days. It was on such a day that I had worked up quite a sweat sparring first with Sesshomaru and then Kurokami. We had all taken a small break and after I had taken a brief rest to down some water I found myself engulfed in a large shadow. I turned around and glared up at the all too familiar and annoying grin of Hibine. “Would you care to spar with me Little Lord,” he asked flashing those fangs and flexing so that his muscles showed. I could feel the muscles in my jaw twitch and I tried my best not to let what I was thinking show on my face as I struggled to keep my temper in check. “I don’t know, can you handle it,” I asked back as I made a show of stretching my arms and then my clawed fingers. His grin grew wider, “I think I can.” “Bring it asshole!” “Should a mother use such language,” he taunted once more. “Oh, I can’t wait to knock some teeth out so that smile amuses me for once,” I replied and I could tell my grin was not a pretty one. At that he lunged at me and I jumped into the air and over his shoulder so that I landed behind him and ducked into a leg sweep as he turned around to make a grab at me. I watched as he fell and jumped back a few steps watching as he jumped back up and into a fighting stance. I grinned and lunged at him and as he swiped at me I reached out and swiped his side and ducked before his arm could catch me and twisted so that I could swipe at his other side before jumping backwards and ducking down as he charged at me. I dodged his attacks, ducking left and right until finally ducked and once again kicked his legs so that he fell backwards catching himself with his hands on the ground before springing back up. His grin was lessened to a small smile and I felt myself grinning while lifting both hands showing my claws with his blood dripping off of them. They were shallow wounds for a demon and his body had probably already healed them but his blood on my claws was a small victory and a nice dent in his pride. “Shall this mother show you how careless you’ve been,” and as I said it I squeezed my claws into my own palms causing them to bleed and then I lifted them and swung my hands as I shouted “Hijin Kesso” and watched as blades of blood tore through his clothes and hit the trees and plants behind him shredding them, cutting into bark and cutting off branches. He stood there shocked and I wiped my hands and took a deep breath flexing my claws again. “Is that enough for you or shall I show you my Sankon Tesso. It’s been a while since I’ve used that one.” “That is enough Inu Yasha, I think Hibine gets the “point”,” Sesshomaru stated almost tonelessly. I turned to see Sesshomaru’s face and saw that the corners of his mouth were just slightly upturned, meaning he had found our match somewhat amusing and was probably even more so amused at the outcome. That made me grin as I turned to face Hibine once again. He put his smile back into place and turned to look at the scenery behind him before whistling and turning to look at me. I was kind of disappointed I hadn’t actually knocked a tooth or two out. “That’s kind of impressive. I have to admit that I am curious to see what you could do when you are truly angered mama dog.” “And I would like to fight you when you’re not holding back. I could tell you were avoiding using full force. If it happens again I won’t forgive you nor will I intentionally miss you next time I attack. I gain nothing by holding back. I want to train seriously so you need to take me seriously.” His smile became more subdued as he looked me over, almost like he was considering my worth and power level before he grinned once more. “I look forward to going another round with you, little mother.” “Keep calling me cutesy names and I’ll break out the big attacks,” I said giving him my biggest grin with just a hint of dislike peaking through. “For your sake and ours lets hope it doesn’t come to that,” Said Kurokami with a grin, “You’ve already destroyed the beautiful scenery, I can only imagine what damage you could do with full power and weapons involved.”   My match with Hibine seemed to put us on equal ground in both of our opinions, though his pet names for me hadn’t ceased his grin had lost some of its condescending appearance and seemed to be more teasing. We received an official notice of invite from Kouga asking that we visit and meet the newest heir of the wolf tribe; his first born son who he and Ayame had named Toborashi. With his name written with the kanji howl and storm I could only imagine that he had inherited his father’s loud mouth but I oddly found myself wanting to see the newest edition.   To Be Continued…. Thank you for your patience. Sorry for such a short chapter. I have all these ideas I want to write down and type up but unfortunately life has been more than difficult this year. I lost my 18 year old Miss Kitty and my mother has gone back in for more surgeries, this time losing the toes on her other foot. So all in all yeah…. Life has been hectic. Thank you for reading and hopefully I’ll be able to update again in the coming month. Kat Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!