Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/11529972.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      F/M
  Fandom:
      Gravity_Falls
  Relationship:
      Dipper_Pines/Mabel_Pines
  Character:
      Dipper_Pines, Mabel_Pines, Grunkle_Stan_|_Stanley_"Stanford"_Pines
  Additional Tags:
      Sibling_Incest, pinecest_-_Freeform
  Series:
      Part 2 of Fistbump_AU
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-07-17 Completed: 2017-08-05 Chapters: 15/15 Words: 80929
****** Fistbump 2 - Unspeakable ******
by Edward_or_Ford
Summary
     Fourteen-year-old Dipper and Mabel return home to California, after a
     tumultuous conclusion to summer vacation at Gravity Falls
Notes
     Author’s note #1: As the title indicates, this story is a sequel to
     “Fistbump”, my first fanfic. Although I have included enough
     exposition in this sequel that reading the first story is not
     strictly necessary, I heavily recommend it. It will give context to
     how Mabel and Dipper got to where they are at the beginning of this
     story. Plus, I think it was a pretty good story in its own right. You
     can find "Fistbump" in my list of Works.
     Author's note #2: I wrote the original Fistbump story and the first
     ten chapters of this sequel from early 2015-early 2016, prior to the
     end of the television series. As such, there are some inconsistencies
     to canon that now cannot be corrected. I will be bringing more of
     these up in notes to later chapters, but for now:
     - I had set the twins' birthday to be the 24th of August instead of
     the 31st, so that there would be a week of summer vacation after
     their birthday.
     Author’s note #3: I very much want your feedback, so please post a
     review or leave a comment. However, I’d like the reader to experience
     the story without any context of where it is going, and the comments
     will almost certainly contain spoilers. So here's my request: if you
     leave a comment on Chapter 1 that deals with your overall impression
     of the story, please do not refer to specifics. Thanks.
     Author’s note #4: I hate to have to write this, but etiquette to the
     appropriate story tags on this site demands I address it. This story
     will get very emotionally intense. Events will occur which will
     result in characters experiencing powerful feelings of loss, anger,
     betrayal and (significantly) violation. To clarify: there are NO
     depictions or suggestion of sexually violent acts anywhere in this
     story, but the emotional consequences experienced by the characters
     may be similar to if there were. Govern yourself accordingly.
***** Chapter 1 *****
===============================================================================
“Time to wake up, sleepyhead!”
Dipper groaned slightly, and cracked open his eyes.  He had always had the
ability to wake up quickly, but his head was feeling very heavy this morning.
 And Mom was being extra bright and bubbly.
Wait … Mom? What’s she doing he- … Oh, right , Dipper remembered.  He was home.
 It was Sunday on Labor Day weekend. He was back in Piedmont, back from Gravity
Falls.  Back from summer’s work, to the start of school in two days.  Back from
rural outback life to familiar suburbia.  Back …
Back to where things would have to return to the way they were, before last
week.
The hint of a smile that had started to form on his face instantly disappeared.
He knew why he was so tired. It wasn’t just that it was after midnight when the
family had arrived home from the bus station last night, so he’d had a short
night’s sleep. His mother didn’t know that he also went without much sleep at
all the previous night, as well.
His mother was making small talk with her son. Dipper slowly sat up, feeling
like he was immersed in molasses.  Not just his body and brain, his whole
insides felt leaden. It wasn’t just lack of sleep: it was much more than that.
 He didn’t really hear much of what his mother was saying, something about how
he felt to now be fourteen years old. He knew that she was genuinely happy to
have her kids back home.  When she appeared satisfied that Dipper was among the
living, she winked at him and told him to wish her luck, because she was going
across the hall. As she breezed out the door from his bedroom, she called out
for Mabel to wake up.
Mabel …
Dipper’s head sagged down, and he closed his eyes briefly. He felt his insides
twist.
Then, with great effort, he drew a deep breath, forced himself to stand, and
headed for the door.
===============================================================================
Mabel’s extraction from the land of sleep seemed to go shockingly easily, for
her.  She was up and into the kitchen barely three minutes behind Dipper, who
was sitting at the table with a bowl of cereal. He looked up at his twin sister
in mild surprise.
“Good morning, Bro Bro!” she sang out to Dipper, practically skipping into the
room, heading for the cupboard for her own bowl. “Ah,  real  breakfast food!
Thanks, Mama!” she called out to their mother in the next room, pouring herself
a bowl of Froot Loops and spooning on extra sugar. She grabbed the bowl and
milk pitcher and carried them over to the table.  “I missed having a proper
breakfast when we were at the Shack,” she said cheerfully as she sat across the
corner of the table beside Dipper.
Dipper looked at Mabel in silent confusion.  How is it she’s so happy? Had she
gotten over everything that had happened? Was she able to just forget about it
and move on? Just like that? Our lives were turned upside down TWICE over the
course of the last week, and she’s just okay with this?
Mabel wasn’t looking Dipper’s way at that moment, so he dropped his stare back
his bowl on the table, his stomach churning around his breakfast cereal. He
wasn’t sure how he was going to get through this.
===============================================================================
Mabel, for her part, had thought a lot about how  she  was going to get through
this.
When their mother had gone into her room to wake her, Mabel was just as
exhausted and despondent as Dipper, but she wasn’t showing it.  After they
arrived home from the bus station mere hours earlier, then said goodnight in
the hallway to Dipper, she had gone to her bedroom on the edge of tears.
Everything hurt. She and Dipper had talked the whole bus ride about how things
had to go, or there would be trouble. Mabel had truly believed that she would
be able to just go back to the way it was before last week. But then, alone in
her room, less than an hour after getting off the bus at the station, she
already knew it was going to be too difficult.
So she came up with another plan. She wouldn’t push herself to change back at
all. She would just be the best actress in the world. She determined that it
would be easier to  fake  being her old self than to actually commit to  being
her old self. She was the extrovert in the family. She was the one who saw the
positive side to everything. She always had. As she finally went to sleep in
the early hours, Mabel vowed to make sure that at least she still looked the
part. This secret was too important.
The twins were keeping a dangerous secret from their parents. Not just from
their parents: this was a secret that  no one  could learn about.
The previous weekend had been the twins’ fourteenth birthday, and to mark the
occasion they had arranged to spend the entire day alone in Portland for the
best sibling-celebration ever. They celebrated far more than they expected to.
The events of the day caused Mabel and Dipper to realize that their feelings
for one another were far more intense than familial love: that they both had,
in fact, been suppressing the fact that they were  in  love with each other
since the end of the previous summer. Before they had gone to sleep late that
night, they were fully committed to one another romantically, and had
passionately given their virginities to each other.
On their return to Gravity Falls from Portland for the final week of the
summer, they continued to quietly experience the wonders of young love. But
unfortunately for them, it had not gone unnoticed. Their great uncle Stan, in
whose home (the “Mystery Shack”) they had been staying the past two summers,
easily noticed the signs of the change in their relationship, and on Friday
night he confronted them about it. He had thought it was just inappropriate
sexual experimentation, but he quickly learned that the kids had hopelessly
fallen for each other.
There was no way that the two of them were equipped to keep an ongoing
boyfriend/girlfriend relationship a secret, it was just too obvious to anyone.
And their lives were far more public in California than they were in rural
Oregon. When (not if) anyone from school or the neighborhood were to notice
them, word of their taboo relationship would spread like wildfire, and they
couldn’t calculate how difficult their lives would become.
Their father and mother, in particular though, were the ones whose reactions
they feared most to discovering their love.  They weren’t terrible parents by
any stretch, in fact they loved and cared for their children just as much as in
any good family, and the kids loved them in return.  But Dipper and Mabel knew
just how outraged and scandalized they would be by what the twins now felt for
each other, and had done with each other.  They were both well-regarded members
at a large local fundamentalist church, and their father in particular believed
strongly in traditional family values. Incest in the home, ongoing or not,
would be completely unacceptable. There was no doubt at all in the minds of
their children that there would be  very  unpleasant consequences if they were
found out, including the prospect of being forcibly separated to boarding
schools.
And the likelihood of being caught was very high. Unlike at the Shack, where
Dipper and Mabel shared a large room in the attic, back at home each had their
own room, and they were both directly next door to their parents’ master
bedroom. Any attempts to spend time together privately, platonic or not, would
be quickly noticed by their parents. Their bedroom doors had no locks on them.
The risk of being discovered was too great.
Stan felt terribly for them, but his advice remained the same: this new part of
their lives that Dipper and Mabel now shared had to stop.  Unhappily, the twins
agreed.  Their one-week romance was finished. They had to try to put their
lives back together as they had been, as merely brother and sister.
They tried to convince each other, and themselves, that they could wait for
each other. That when they were eighteen, they could run off together. They
couldn’t admit to each other how unlikely they thought that was to come to
pass.
Grunkle Stan did not prohibit them one last time of intimacy on Friday night.
They had made love slowly and gently, tearfully treasuring their time together,
knowing that what they were sharing was precious and rare, even if it was
forbidden.
===============================================================================
Dipper was thinking back to that moment barely more than twenty-four hours
before, the most wonderful yet tragic event in his young life, as he ate his
cereal. This was so hard, Mabel was sitting  right there , not three feet away!
He wanted to look at her, take her in his arms, kiss her lips, tear her clothes
off ...
"Earth to Dipper?" his mother asked, jolting him from his thoughts.
“Huh?” Dipper responded dumbly.
Her mother walked over to the table. "I just asked you if you’re all right. I
don't believe you've said a word all morning!"
"Yeah! … Yeah, Mom, I'm ... fine," Dipper replied quietly, not quite looking
up. "Guess I'm just still tired."
His mother waited a couple of beats, looking to Mabel before jokingly
admonishing her son. “Oh, poor sweepy widdle boy!” she teased. “Does Mommy need
to tuck you back into his widdle bed?”
“Mo-om! You’re as bad as Mabel!” Dipper groaned. “Only not as creative,” he
added.
“Actually I  was  waiting on you there, Pumpkin,” their mother said to Mabel,
smiling. “I was sure you’d be the one to jab a needle at your  po-wah widdle
brudder .” Dipper sighed, closing his eyes in resignation. Their mother’s smile
widened. “You not quite up to speed this morning either?”
“I’m fine!” Mabel exclaimed. “Just feeling sorry for the old lump! Bap!” Mabel
leaned across the table and cuffed Dipper on the arm. He yelped and rubbed his
bicep. He didn’t really feel like getting ganged up on by these two, and
continued to mope.
Mabel waited for Dipper to look up, but she had to prompt him. “Hey, Dipper?”
Mabel prodded.
Glumly, Dipper looked up to see the fist that Mabel had used to punch him was
still there, held directly in front of him across the corner of the table. He
glanced up to see Mabel’s face, fondly smiling at him.
A small smile of his own broke, and he brought his sore arm up and tapped his
own fist to Mabel’s.
“Ah, there’s the fistbump!” their mother said. “I’ve missed that. It’s so cute!
Now finish up and get ready, shower and get dressed. Service starts in forty-
five minutes, we have to leave in thirty!” she said as she whisked down the
hall to her bedroom.
After she left, Dipper and Mabel continued to smile at each other. They had
been bumping fists for years as a way of communicating solidarity and teamwork
between them. Everyone knew the hand signal, it was no secret. But as of the
day before, the gesture now had a new secret meaning known only to them. On the
bus from Oregon, they had agreed to adopt the fistbump as their silent “I love
you” signal, so they could tell each other how they still felt about the other
without raising suspicion.  
Dipper was happy to see how well it worked for him. One little tap, and he felt
so much better! The smile touched his eyes. He loved Mabel so much!
Mabel smiled wider at the way Dipper had perked up.  She hated seeing his sad
puppy-dog face, she couldn’t stand not letting him know how she was really
feeling about him.
Both of them were thinking the same thing: maybe, just maybe, this  won’t  be
so hard. Perhaps they could bear to tough this out. Together, they could handle
these obstacles! Their love was strong enough, they just  knew  it! Nothing
could stop them from …
“What’s up with you two?” came a voice from the entrance to the kitchen.
Dipper and Mabel looked up, startled. Their father stood there, gripping a tie
in his hand, and finishing buttoning up his shirt. They hadn’t been aware that
he had come out from the master bedroom, and was apparently watching them gaze
at one another. “What?” the twins said in unison, eyes wide.
“Whaaat?!?” their father mocked back at them with an easy smile. “I walk in
here to say ‘good morning,’ and I see the two of you just staring googly eyes
at each other?” Dipper felt himself pale, but tried not to change his
expression. “You’re probably plotting some new shenanigan or other, as usual,
but you looked so pleased with yourselves I thought you might start kissing!”
Mabel uttered a nervous laugh, and made a quick “Pfft!” noise, while Dipper
belatedly added a meek “Eww!” Their father snorted and chuckled. “I know you
two are best friends on top of being twins, but you looked  ridiculous ! Now,
hurry up!” His demeanor turned more serious. “Your mother already told you.
Both of you need to get cleaned up and we need to be out of here in a half
hour. One of you, get going now!”
“I’ll go!” volunteered Dipper quickly. He leaped to his feet, eager to remove
himself from Mabel’s presence. He mentally kicked himself. Their first day
back, less than five minutes, and they'd already made a small mistake! He  had
to be more careful! He  had  to tone down his feelings!  It’s over, Dipper!  he
berated himself.  You can’t let yourself get caught up again! Yes, you’re in
love with your sister! No, you can’t  do  anything about it! Get over it!!
Mabel watched Dipper hurry down the hall, then finished off her cereal and
collected their dishes from the table. She regretted almost getting caught. But
she didn’t regret letting Dipper know that she was just acting the part of the
"old" version of Mabel, that she was still very much in love with him.  This is
going to be super-duper hard!  she thought.  But what we have is worth it! I
wish like heck we could find some private time, so I can drop this dumb act for
awhile.  She put her game face back on again, convincing herself to be prepared
to be in this role for a long, long time.
===============================================================================
The Pines family had been regular church-goers for the twins’ entire lives. It
was part of their experience of growing up, so none of it was uncomfortable for
them. Unlike for their parents, though, the church was not an integral part of
either of the twins’ belief systems.
Dipper had no issue at all with the concept of belief in God. Indeed he firmly
believed that there were good and evil forces in the world that were
unexplainable by science. The problem with him was that he didn’t like blind
faith: he needed to see evidence of the supernatural. And he’d seen  plenty  of
that the previous summer. Unfortunately for his church, none of what Dipper had
seen could be corroborated anywhere in the Bible. The mysterious journals had
been  his  bibles. Still, he had politely continued attendance at church,
knowing that staying home would not be well received by his parents, but also
truly unwilling to let go of all the lessons he had been taught since Sunday
school.
Mabel really enjoyed the music and singing at church, and she had a lot of
friends there. She agreed with pretty much all of Christianity’s tenets of
right and wrong, with the basic message of love and peace, of mercy and
compassion. But she just didn’t buy into the whole idea that a God that could
be such a buttface in the Old Testament could be so darn forgiving in the New
Testament. Maybe having a kid changed His outlook on life? Regardless of all
that, she now was  really  uncomfortable with knowing what she had read about
in the 18th chapter of the book of Leviticus, given what Dipper and Mabel were
to each other now. She had an inane thought that she should tear that chapter
out of every Bible in the building, just in case anyone around church found out
about them.
Of course, neither of them were concentrating on the service that day. During
the sermon, they stared straight ahead to the pastor, by outward appearances
paying rapt attention to the message extolling the importance of evangelism in
today’s society. Mabel’s subtle shift in her seat beside her brother, so that
their shoulders were touching slightly, was sending Dipper’s thoughts
elsewhere. And as those thoughts continued, his body also started sending his
blood elsewhere. He had to spend the balance of the service with his hands
clasped together firmly, low in his lap, pushing down.
Mabel glanced down at the state of his posture, then directed her eyes back
toward the podium. She allowed a small smile to cross her face.
Dipper sat still in aroused frustration.  Dammit Mabel, how do you do this to
me?
After the service was over, their folks visited a number of tables with sign-up
sheets, while the twins and other kids hung out in the gymnasium.  Soon their
mother called for them to go, and they headed out to the car.
“So those tables were for signing up for autumn small group studies,” their
father told them. “Your mother and I were looking at a group that will be
reading through the Book of Ephesians, and we want to join them. Now that
you’re starting high school, we figure you’ll be able to do your homework
without one of us needing to be around every night.” They had arrived at the
car and were getting in. “Starting this week, you two will be on your own on
Wednesday evenings after dinner. Sound good?”
“Sounds  great , Daddy!” Mabel enthused from her seat behind their father.
Making sure their parents were looking to get their seatbelts on, she turned
and looked at Dipper pointedly, grinning widely and waggling her eyebrows.
“Yeah, Dad, sounds great,” Dipper chimed in, looking back at Mabel with an
expression that was mix of excitement and trepidation.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 2 *****
===============================================================================
Tuesday came, and with it came Dipper and Mabel’s first day at Piedmont High
School. They were due to start Grade 9.
Mabel was looking forward to seeing her old friends from middle school again,
and hopefully making new friends. They had so much to catch up on, as she had
not seen anybody since leaving for Gravity Falls after their last class in the
spring.
She also hoped that seeing friends again would help take her mind off her new
life at home.  Boy, is it difficult to practise method acting all the time!
she thought. Every moment that her parents could see her, she was “on”: the
hammy, carefree Mabel that they had known and loved for fourteen years. She
found that she was even denying herself the ability to turn it off when she was
alone, it was too hard to switch back when necessary.  Maybe away from Mama and
Daddy, I can get a bit of a rest.
Dipper was looking forward to classes beginning again, but not to having to
enter on the lowest rung of the social ladder. He was still a bit short for his
age, and thought he was scrawny even for his height. Plus he was pretty much a
huge nerd. He knew that high school was where everyone got sorted into cliques,
and he hoped that the jock set at this school would go easy on the geeks.
In the high school jungle, having a girlfriend can be a great defense against
the alpha gorillas. Just his luck, he had the best girl he could ever hope for,
and couldn’t even show her off at school, and would never be able to.
The high school was right beside the middle school, still walking distance from
the Pines family home, so the twins walked together, carrying their backpacks.
As they walked down the upscale neighborhood streets toward school, they had
their first opportunity to privately talk since their arrival off the bus, days
before.
“I love you, Dipper,” Mabel said quietly.
Dipper looked around for anyone in earshot. “I love you, too,” he replied
quickly while looking down, then added, “I miss you,” glancing up at her face.
“Ditto,” she said with a small smile. They walked without speaking a bit
further.
Dipper looked over, concerned about Mabel’s uncharacteristic silence. She had
seemed to be handling things so well the last couple of days, appearing so
normal (well, “normal” for Mabel, anyway) around everyone, but now he wasn’t so
sure. “You okay?” he asked sincerely.
“I guess,” Mabel sighed. “I just have to get used to this. It’s hard being
‘Mabel’ all the time! Now’s the first chance I’ve had to be  me  since we got
home.”
That’s a weird thing to say , Dipper thought. “What are you talking about?” he
asked with a smile. “You  are  Mabel!”
“I’m talking about the  character  I’m playing at home. You know, ‘Mabel!’” she
emphasized with air quotes. “The silly goofball who’s  not  in love with her
brother?”
Dipper considered that without speaking for few steps. Finally, he said
quietly, “I hope ‘Mabel’ isn’t just a character anymore.” He paused again,
looking at her shyly. “I happen to love the silly goofball!”
Mabel felt herself blush at his sappy comment, and immediately decided she
needed to return the favor. “Yeah, but does she do  this  for you?” she asked
with quiet innuendo, as she crossed over in front of him to walk on the other
side of her brother, quickly grabbing his crotch along the way. Dipper jumped
in surprise and alarm.
“Mabel!” he scolded her hoarsely, then looked up and down the street. “You
can’t  do  that! It’s too risky! What if somebody sees?”
She pouted for a second, then grudgingly agreed. “Sorry. Couldn’t resist. I
won’t do it again.” She looked over to him again shrewdly. “Not until tomorrow
night, that is!” she purred.
A happy tingle ran up Dipper’s spine on hearing Mabel’s promise to him. On
first learning of their parents’ plans to attend a Bible study on Wednesday
evenings, he wondered if it was really the best idea to sneak in “quality time”
together so quickly after they agreed they needed to stay apart. Mabel was
obviously in favor of it. The love he felt for her had a way of starting to
change his mind. Hormones took care of changing the  rest  of his mind. Mabel
smirked at the growing redness in Dipper’s cheeks.
“There  is  a …  tiny  problem with tomorrow night, though,” Mabel continued,
quietly and more seriously. “You need to get some …” she cleared her throat, “…
condoms,” she mumbled.
The color of Dipper’s cheeks turned from red to a shade that was almost ashen
in seconds. He remembered Mabel telling him the night they first made love that
she had just had her period three days before. Quick math and recalling what
he'd learned on the Internet about menstrual cycles proved that Mabel was
right: she would be two weeks into her cycle tomorrow, the worst possible time
for a girl to be unduly exposed to her brother’s sperm.
He stopped in his tracks on the sidewalk and gaped at his sister. “I’ve never
bought condoms before!” he whispered urgently.
“Well,  duh! ” Mabel jabbed back affectionately. "Not the biggest surprise
there, loverboy!”
Dipper wasn’t in the mood for joking around. He shushed her to quiet down, then
continued in a low voice. “I mean, I don’t ...  know  how to get them! I’m only
a kid, I can’t just walk into a drugstore and buy them, can I?”
“Uhh … yeah!” Mabel retorted in her own hushed tone. “You remember me telling
you about Jordan’s sister, Kennedy? She’s only a year older than us, and she’s
been buying her own condoms since middle school!”
“You also said everyone  knows  Kennedy’s a slut,” Dipper fired back, trying to
keep his voice down, “and you were right! Even  I  knew she’s a slut!”
Mabel poked her finger to Dipper’s chest, and growled sexily under her breath.
“Well, if you want tomorrow night to happen, you’re going to have to be  my
slut, dear brother!” She then gave him a playful shove with her palm.
Dipper recovered his balance and hovered near Mabel again. “Oh, c’mon! There’s
no pharmacy anywhere near the school. Where can I go to where no one knows …”
A voice called out from behind them, accompanied by running footsteps. A girl,
who Dipper recognized as Mabel’s friend Sandra, was sprinting towards them.
“Maaa-belllll!” she was shrieking. Mabel turned to the approaching teenager,
face lighting up. “Amper-Sandraaaaaaaa!” she screeched back, and ran to meet
her friend.
Dipper held his palm to his forehead through his ball cap as the two friends
reacquainted themselves.  I’m going to have to figure this out on my own,
aren’t I?
Mabel and Sandra quickly walked past Dipper and started to continue on their
way to school, leaving Dipper standing there. Mabel turned as she walked.
“C’mon, Bro Bro!” she called. “You’re gonna be late if you just stand there,
Dippiter! You’re going to get those  other things  after school this afternoon,
right?”
Dipper started walking after the girls. Ahead he could hear Sandra ask “What
other things?” and Mabel’s reply of “I don’t know, just some nerd stuff he
wants to get.” He shook his head, marveling at his sister’s acting ability. His
lover was temporarily gone, and air-quotes-Mabel was back.
===============================================================================
Opening day at Piedmont High started off uneventfully for the freshmen Grade 9
students. Everyone found their class schedule. The twins noted that they had
two classes together that first semester.
At lunch, Dipper met up with Ezra and Anthony, his two closest buddies from
Grade 8, and got caught up on the latest gaming console titles and trading card
games that their little crowd was into. Dipper’s friends also pressed him on
the happenings in Oregon. They had been among the few who had taken seriously
any of the stories of what had happened in Gravity Falls the previous summer,
and both were heavily disappointed that Dipper had no new tales to tell
following a second summer there.
Mostly, though, Dipper was trying to figure out where he was going to go after
school to pick up his “supplies” for tomorrow night. He was also trying to
figure out how to keep from getting hard-ons whenever he would think of the
reasons for those supplies. It was almost impossible for him to not keep
glancing to the table where Mabel and her friends sat halfway across the large
room.
Mabel and Sandra found their other friends Jordan and Aisha, and a new friend
Juanita. They were a decidedly multicultural group within the predominantly
anglo school. Together they gleefully updated their group on their summer’s
activities. They glanced around at the boys that passed by in the cafeteria,
with many comments of approval on how hot the guys in the upper grades were.
Mabel joined in this discussion, as she would have the previous year. She
wondered how many of her friends were like her, putting on an act for the sake
of the others, silently hiding their true lives and emotions.
Aisha was the most connected of the group to the older girls in the school, and
she pointed out many of them and gave her friends a quick bio. Angelina was the
likely head cheerleader and popular snob, don’t get on her bad side. Riley was
into drugs and booze, but still kind of cool to talk to. Margaret was the
driven, proper student, most likely to be valedictorian, doesn’t have a lot of
time for anyone. Aisha knew almost everybody.
As lunch period came to a close, Mabel glanced across to where she had seen
Dipper sit with his old friends. The twins locked eyes momentarily, and both of
them smiled unconsciously. Juanita noticed the connection, and asked, “So
Mabel, who’s that boy over there?”
Mabel had been thinking decidedly un-brotherly thoughts about Dipper at that
moment, and she almost flushed. Sandra pounced on Juanita’s question. “Ooh,
that’s her dork twin brother! Mabel doesn’t like to admit it, but she and
Dipper are BFFs! It’s so sweet!” Sandra laughed as she dodged the friendly poke
she knew was coming. She kept up her teasing of Mabel. “You seemed to hang
around with him all the time last year, and you spent all summer up north with
him again! Aren’t you sick of him yet?”
She glanced back to Dipper’s table, but he and his friends were walking away
from their table. Outwardly indifferent, but thinking about Wednesday evening,
she decided to answer truthfully. “Nope! He’s my brother, my best friend, and I
love him!” she announced to her friends, eliciting a chorus of “Awww”s for her
innocent-sounding proclamation.
===============================================================================
Breathe slow, Dipper , he told himself again.  You can do this! Man up!
Dipper was standing around the corner of the “family planning” aisle in the big
CVS pharmacy down by I-580. He’d called his Mom at home, telling her he wanted
to go the library after school, took the bus down Grand Avenue, and walked the
rest of the way. It was not the regular drug store preferred by his parents.
He had surveyed the aisle sufficiently, walking down twice without stopping.
The first time he located the shelf with the condoms, deciding on Trojans
because they were the brand he recognized. The second time he tried to analyze
the sizes and styles, and had no idea how to compare them, trying to read the
labels while walking past them. He finally decided he’d just take the first box
of Trojans he could lay his hands on.
Waiting until another shopper walked past him, Dipper took a deep breath and
turned the corner. Had anyone cared to be watching, Dipper’s attempt at
nonchalance would not have won any acting awards, but he managed to grab a box
while knocking only three other boxes onto the floor. Securing a bag of potato
chips to provide cover for the contents of his hand, he made his way to
checkout.
There was only one register open, with a short line. This would be the hardest
part: putting that box on the conveyor belt for the cashier and anyone behind
him in line to see. He steeled himself and took his place.
It was about to be his turn, the customer in front of him was just unzipping
her purse. The chips were already on the platform, the box ready to be placed,
when Dipper chanced to look up at the entrance to the store. Walking through
the automatic door was his youth pastor at church.  Uhh, seriously!? Now?  he
thought desperately to himself.
Dipper lost all of his nerve. He left the chips on the belt, crammed the
condoms into a box of chocolate bars beside the register, and swiftly made for
the exit door before the pastor was able to spot him. He walked five minutes to
the library, signed out the first Robert Hienlien novel he saw, and quickly
boarded a bus back to Piedmont. He’d have to get this task done the following
afternoon, before his parents left for their discussion group that evening.
===============================================================================
That plan didn’t work out for Dipper. On Wednesday morning, the twins’ mother
told them both to come straight home after school. She had come up with some
new rules and responsibilities for the household for the new school year with
the kids, and wanted to go over them. Since he had already signalled to Mabel
that he had failed the previous day, Mabel was a touch irritated, but had no
opportunity to say anything to Dipper.  Sandra was waiting in front of the
Pines’ house to walk with them to school.
Mabel, Dipper, Anthony, and Sandra walked home from school together, as they
often had in years past. Anthony and Sandra had little in common, other than
the twins as their friends, so when they walked it was generally the boys and
girls having separate conversations. When Anthony turned off to his street, he
asked Dipper if he wanted to come by after supper to play a few rounds of MtG
with him and his brother.
“Thanks, but I think I’m supposed to stick around the house tonight,” Dipper
replied, making sure that Mabel would overhear the comment.
Mabel heard. “You sure about that, Dipper?” she cut in evenly. “I don’t think
you  have  to stay home.”
Dipper turned to look at his sister. There was no playfulness, no smile, only a
neutral look. Anthony and Sandra thought it was nothing, just a girl correcting
her brother on a fact of little importance. But Dipper now knew she was more
than a bit pissed at him.
Looking directly at Mabel, Dipper responded, “Maybe I don’t  have  to stay
home, but I  want  to.”
“Suit yourself,” Mabel replied, still poker-faced, then turned and continued
with Sandra towards their home.
Dipper tried to appear normal as Anthony gave him a weird look. They said
they’d see each other later, and Dipper walked off behind the girls. He hoped
that he’d be able to patch it up with Mabel after their parents left for the
evening.
For her part, Mabel couldn't handle dealing with Dipper anymore at that moment.
She'd been holding off masturbating the last few days since learning of their
upcoming time alone. Now her bottled up arousal and frustration were combining
to make her angry with her brother. She knew better than to push things, as she
was likely to say something that Sandra or her parents might overhear.
===============================================================================
The rest of the afternoon dragged on tensely, but their mother didn’t appear to
notice. Their father arrived home from work and the family ate normally. The
parents asked if the kids could please clean up the dinner dishes for them, as
they had to leave for their study group.
As soon as the car was out of the driveway and on the street, Mabel glared at
Dipper.
“What was so hard that you couldn’t do just this one thing? Just buy a lousy
box of condoms at a drugstore!” she grumbled.
Dipper was apologetic. “I’m sorry! Pastor Jim walked in as I was in line. I
panicked!”
“So couldn't you have gone back again a few minutes later? Or just gone to
another pharmacy?” Mabel sat on the living room sofa in a huff. “I just don’t
get it! I’ve seen you fight zombies, a shapeshifter … you leaped off a cliff to
rescue me from a giant robot! Why couldn’t you do this?”
“I don’t know!” Dipper groaned, rubbing his head. “Those were when we were in
danger … but this was dangerous too, Mabel! Exactly what am I going to say to
people who know me if they see  me , of all kids, with a box of  condoms ?”
A small smirk crossed Mabel’s face. “You could tell them you met someone new at
school … someone who likes you and you think may be special. And you want to be
ready so you both can be safe!"
Dipper stopped and looked at Mabel. “You think anyone would really believe
that?” he asked seriously.
“Yeah, they would!” The smirk grew to an evil grin. “Especially if you tell
them his name!”
“Whose name would I … wait,  what ?” Dipper protested.
Mabel put on an innocent face, and said nothing.
Dipper sighed, seeing Mabel was toying with him. “Look, this skulking around
just really freaks me out. I’m so scared of doing something that could cause us
to get caught. I would just … Mabel, you  know  what Dad and Mom could do if
they find out! I’d rather face anything that Gravity Falls  ever  dished out at
us … than risk facing life without you,” he finished softly.
The irritation inside Mabel melted away with those words from her brother.
Whatever his little failings, she saw that Dipper cared deeply about her and
about their ability to remain together. It was hard to stay mad at him, it
always was! She whined quietly and quickly got to her feet, stepping over to
him and opening her arms. They held each other tightly, and Dipper whispered he
was sorry again.
“I know you are,” she told him, “and I know how important this secret is. Maybe
I shouldn’t push it, but it’s so  hard ! I love you so much, you big sack of
mush!”
Dipper smiled and hugged tighter. “I love you, too, you silly … bundle of …
ugh, whatever!” He pulled back, and he tenderly kissed his sister, their first
kiss since they had arrived home. It was brief, but full of emotion. Dipper was
aware they were standing in the middle of the living room, in full view of the
street through the large window. “Think we should probably go somewhere without
an audience?” he said, nodding at the street.
“Ack, yes!” Mabel replied sharply. She grabbed his hand and they dashed back to
the bedrooms, choosing Dipper’s room because the door to his room was about a
foot closer to the living room than Mabel’s.
When they were barely over the threshold, their lips came together again, then
their whole bodies. As they necked, they clumsily shuffled to Dipper’s bed,
where they flopped down together, laughing into each other’s mouths. Their
urgency sated for the moment, they gave each other their favorite full-body,
full squeeze hug, as they lay cheek-to-cheek in each other’s arms. (Mabel even
had a name for it: the "not-so-awkward-sibling-hug". Dipper had yet to agree to
the name.) Mabel fluttered as she felt Dipper’s erection pressing into her
crotch through his pants.
“So I guess that was our first fight? As a couple?” Dipper asked, as they
slightly relaxed their hold on one another.
“I guess so,” Mabel replied with a grin, rubbing her nose together with her
brother’s. Then her expression turned faux-serious. “Too bad we don’t have any
condoms , ’cause I hear make-up sex is the  best! ”
A sheepish smile crossed Dipper’s face. “Yeah, yeah! Sorry!” Mabel kissed him
deeply to show there were no hard feelings, she just enjoyed giving him digs.
Her hands roamed freely over his body, as she missed the feel of his body on
hers. She wondered how she would ever get used to  not  being able to feel her
brother next to her.
But for now, she would take advantage of how close they  could  be to one
another. Propping herself up quickly, Mabel took off her sweater and shirt,
prompting Dipper to do the same with his own t-shirt. Dipper loved Mabel’s
breasts and the reactions he could get out of her from them, and he gazed at
her chest hungrily. Her mounds were small and firm, not requiring a bra when
Mabel wore her trademark sweaters. Dipper knew from experience that her nipples
were very sensitive, and she loved it when he gently used his teeth on them. He
gave them a soft squeeze, and pinched her nipples lightly, drawing a wonderful-
sounding gasp from Mabel. Then they lay back down again and resumed their
kissing, satisfied to resume their foreplay with delicious skin-to-skin
contact.
Dipper’s hands moved over Mabel’s torso with an expertise that belied his lack
of experience. Though they had fewer than a dozen sexual encounters up to that
point, he had paid close attention to Mabel’s reactions and what triggered
them. He used his palms and fingertips in different combinations, light touches
and firm strokes, in different places. Combined with the slow grinding of their
clothed hips together, he not-so-slowly worked her arousal up.
Mabel knew it was a little more difficult for her to return the favor. Dipper
was still intensely ticklish, and she had learned last week that it kind of
interrupts things if your lover suddenly convulses and shrinks into a fetal
position as you are caressing him. The palms of her hands were fine, but that
left her feeling that Dipper was being underserved. Mabel decided he needed
some help further down, so she slipped her free hand down between them and
started massaging on the hard protrusion in his pants.
A groan arose from Dipper as Mabel started rubbing up and down, squeezing his
penis through his clothes. For several heartbeats, he increased the pace of the
movement of his hands on her body. Then he froze, as he felt a rapid tightening
in his groin. He broke the kiss as fast as he could. “Mabel, stop!” he cried
desperately, but it was too late.
Mabel stopped cold in momentary confusion as Dipper tensed, and moaned
“Noooooo!” through his teeth. Then Mabel felt his penis pulsing in her hand
through the fabric, and she knew what had happened.
Mabel had stumbled on something that Dipper had been trying to hide from her.
He had a bad case of premature ejaculation, something not exactly rare for an
over-stimulated boy just turned fourteen. It had happened their first night
together, and since then Dipper had been secretly masturbating prior to their
lovemaking. He’d not raised any suspicions from Mabel because with his near
constant state of arousal, it had never taken him longer than a minute or two
in private before he was done. But on this evening, he was so distressed over
Mabel’s anger that the task had never occurred to him.
After the embarrassing deed was complete, he opened his eyes, but didn’t want
to look at his sister, and gingerly started to get up. Mabel held him firm, and
pulled his face to hers. Her expression showed amusement more than anything,
but that didn’t make Dipper feel any better. She opted to replace humor with
compassion. She pulled him close and whispered to him that it was all right.
Shamefully, he explained what was wrong, and what he had been doing.
“I wish I didn’t have to … get off like that first,” as he continued his
confession, “but it makes things so much better, Mabel! I’m able to keep going
so much longer with you after I’ve … taken care of myself first.”
“Dipper, you don’t have to do that alone! I’d love to … you know, help you with
that!” she assured him, and she plainly meant it.
Dipper did feel a bit better to know Mabel wasn’t put off by the revelation.
Still, he screwed up his face as he awkwardly started to get up off the bed.
“Be careful what you wish for, Mabel,” he grimaced. “This is  really  gross! I
have to go to the bathroom.” He walked bow-legged into the hallway.
“I  have  seen that stuff before, you know!” she called, following him out of
the bedroom. “You’ve put quite a bit inside me, if I recall correctly!” she
added, laughing.
“You’ve been getting round two,” Dipper replied quietly as he carefully pulled
his pants and underwear down in front of the sink, then he grabbed a washcloth
from a shelf and wet it. “Do you have to watch this?” he complained, exhaling
loudly at Mabel’s wide grin and enthusiastic nod. Resigned, he reluctantly
continued, “Trust me, I know how different it is. There’s a lot …” he gestured
to the mess, “...  more  … here than I’ve been giving you. I have a lot less
stuff the second time, and takes me a lot longer to get there, but it feels
way  more intense when it happens.” He made a face as he started wiping himself
clean.
“Oh, so you’ve been giving me substandard product?” Mabel joked. Dipper groaned
at her as he continued to wipe up semen. She beheld her brother, spunk-filled
underwear and pants at his ankles, knees spread, pelvis extended, bent over,
and wiping his sticky crotch. She crossed her arms over her bare chest and
leaned against the doorframe. “What a  beautiful  vision to have burned into my
brain!” she smirked at him. “Where’s that memory eraser gun gone to?”
Dipper continued in silence, not enjoying Mabel’s barbs. He finished drying
himself off, then completed the job of undressing himself, trying to prevent
the semen in his clothes from getting all over everything. Now naked, he stood
in front of the sink washing out his underwear, thoroughly deflated both
emotionally and sexually.
Mabel’s smirk softened to an affectionate smile. Dipper was being all sucky
again! She crept up behind her brother and wrapped her arms around his waist
from behind, resting her chin on his left shoulder. Dipper unconsciously
relaxed, closing his eyes and leaning his head back over to hers. She smiled at
their reflection in the mirror. For all the differences in their personalities,
she loved how alike they were as well. Like how they knew each other enough to
not only get under each others’ skins, but also want to press their skins
together.
Dipper let go of his frustration with Mabel’s rapid back-and-forth swings
between gentle empathy and making jokes: it was just part of what made her
Mabel, the girl he was in love with. He opened his eyes and looked back at his
and his sister’s image in the reflection in front of him. They were both still
about the same height, so their heads were nestled together perfectly.
They had never seen themselves together like this, looking at faces that they
had seen smiling back from countless photos, but never before in such an
intimate embrace. Yes, there was an obvious family resemblance, no one would
ever think they  weren’t  brother and sister to see them. The same round shape
of their faces, their large and expressive dark eyes, small noses, and thick
brown hair: they were cut from the same cloth. Dipper wondered if any photos of
themselves from now on would capture the change that had come to them. Mabel
wondered if a couple could look any more  adorable  together, and she reached
up around to gently poke her finger in Dipper’s right cheek. Dipper guided his
left hand to Mabel’s left cheek to return the gesture, Mabel giggling as he
narrowly missed poking her in the eye.
Mabel pulled Dipper into herself firmly and pressed her breasts harder into his
back. She guided her hand back to his torso, moving it slowly over his nearly-
hairless chest and stomach. Dipper tensed and started shaking with suppressed,
uncomfortable laughter, allowing Mabel to teasingly walk the fine line between
tickling and caressing.  With her other hand, she had unzipped her skirt, and
was deftly dropping the remainder of her clothing to the floor. After kicking
her clothes away, she then turned him around and they easily slipped their arms
around each other.
Suddenly, Mabel perked up. "Well,  that  little adventure in sexual self-
control is done!” Mabel declared. She transitioned to a truly terrible British
accent, and proclaimed, “After conducting thyself with the  g-drdrdrd-randest
dignity, I shall knight thee! You shall be named ... Sir Dipshit of Came-a-
lot!” Mabel grinned widely at her dorkus of a brother.
Dipper shook his head in wonder, trying to determine if he should be amused, or
try to feel offended. The look on his sister’s face tipped the scale, and his
chest was shaking in stifled laughter as Mabel leaned in to press her tongue
into his mouth.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 3 *****
===============================================================================
After they fumbled their way back to Dipper’s bedroom between clumsy kisses and
groping, Mabel pushed Dipper down to sit on the edge of his bed, then she made
herself comfortable sideways on his lap. They were necking and fondling heavily
when Mabel broke the kiss suddenly.
“Seriously, Dip!” she panted. “We’ve  got  to figure out what in Sweet Sally
we’re going to do here ... because, you  can’t  end up inside me tonight!”
Dipper idly massaged one of Mabel’s breasts. “I know,” he replied. “I had a
sixteen-point plan on how the condom rollout was going to go, but I never had
any opportunity to plan for  this ,” he said with a straight face. Mabel
regarded Dipper, trying to decide if he was attempting to be funny or not. She
decided that it was a hugely dorky comment either way, so it didn’t really
matter.  
The truth was that although the twins had tried a few positions for performing
intercourse while in Oregon, they actually had very little experience with
other means of pleasing one another, beyond simply fingering each other. They
were too young to have developed a liking for kinkier ways of sex. Using toys
or other objects were out. They didn’t even know that anal sex was “a thing”,
and both would have immediately been grossed out by the idea in any case.
They decided that taking turns with oral sex was their only option. Dipper had
tried pleasuring Mabel orally a couple of times, and while she had more than
enjoyed it enough, he had found that she had tendencies that could make it
somewhat painful work for him. Mabel’s experience with fellatio was limited to
two attempts, the last episode substantially less successful than the brief
first time. Still, they were both game to try it again that evening.
Dipper slid Mabel off his lap and onto the bed. He gently guided her down onto
her back, lightly kissing her neck along the way. He traced his fingers all
over her body, paying close attention to those spots that he knew were Mabel’s
joy buzzers.
Then he climbed over her, straddling her thighs as he continued his light
massage. Mabel hummed happily while busying her hands on Dipper's chest, hips,
and legs.
Slowly, Dipper lowered his head to Mabel’s chest. With agonizing deliberation,
he ran his tongue up her breastbone between her small mounds, up to her throat.
Then he swiftly latched onto the sensitive spot of her neck below her left ear
with his mouth, while his fingers deftly found her nipples and lightly pinched
them. The combined actions produced a sharp breath from Mabel, then a long moan
as she reached for Dipper’s penis.
He quickly pushed his stomach down, blocking her access. He raised his face
from her neck to look directly into her eyes. “Nuh uh!” Dipper lovingly said,
their noses and foreheads resting together. “I’ll get my turn later. This is
for you!” Then he mashed his lips onto hers as he gave her nipples a harder
pinch and twist. Mabel squealed in pleasure and surprise into his mouth.
Emboldened, Dipper decided that he would get his sister off in a different way
than he had tried before. He wanted to try bringing her to her climax as
quickly as possible, then slowly work her way back to more after that. He
wasted no more time. Breaking the kiss suddenly, he scrambled down her body,
tracing his tongue to both of her breasts and her navel along the way. In
seconds, his face had arrived at Mabel's shaved vulva. He planted kisses and
small licks to the top of the slit, as his knees released their grip on her
thighs and he eased her legs apart until she was spread wide open for him. Then
without an instant's further hesitation, Dipper sucked her clitoris into his
mouth, working it over firmly with the flat of his tongue, while sliding his
left middle finger into and out of her vagina.
Seconds earlier, Mabel had been wondering why Dipper was in such a hurry. Now
she didn't care, she just craned her neck back and closed her eyes. Her
breathing quickened, and she produced a series of moans that was rapidly
escalating in volume.
Dipper loved that they didn't have to be quiet. Hearing Mabel's sounds of
arousal allowed him to know right away that he was doing something correctly.
He redoubled his efforts with his mouth and gave her clitoris gentle nibbles,
while adding his index finger to the sawing motion on the front wall of her
tunnel.
"Oh my God you're so good at that!" Mabel cried out. Or at least she tried to,
as she was only capable of uttering incoherent babble. Dipper's right hand slid
up her stomach to find a nipple, and with a pinch she shuddered even harder.
His ministrations were sending her over the edge faster than she had ever gone,
her days of pent up sexual energy helping to push her along.
Barely a minute later, her orgasm erupted. She rode out the first few waves of
what she knew would be a long tsunami of ecstasy. She would gladly drown in
this ocean of pure pleasure. Time seemed to stand still. There was nothing left
at all in the world except her love for Dipper, and the unbelievably intense
feelings he was giving to her. Nothing at all ...
... except for the realization that Dipper's expert cunnilingus and fingering
had stopped some seconds before. And that he was presently fighting to pull his
head back from her thighs while prying desperately on her hands. Thighs that
were squeezing Dipper's head securely to Mabel's genitals. Hands whose fingers
were tightly wound into the hair on Dipper's head. With a startled yelp, Mabel
relaxed her legs and released her grip on Dipper's head.
Dipper immediately fell backward, gasping wildly for breath while furiously
massaging his scalp. He didn't know which sensation has been more
uncomfortable, the suffocation or the hair pulling. She'd done both to him a
couple of times before, but this had been all kinds of worse! Weirdly, he knew
that this had also been a kind of compliment to his skills, but it was small
comfort at that moment.
Mabel scrambled to where Dipper lay crumpled up at the foot of his bed. "I'm
sorry! ... I'm so sorry!" she cried, still very much out of breath herself. She
laid down and hugged his heaving body to her own. She kissed the top of his
head around the movement of his hands, panting apologies. Moments later, the
urgency had passed, though Dipper was still trying to catch his breath. Mabel
kissed him tenderly on his temple. “You’ve been studying up … from the Internet
… haven’t you … you big nerd!” she breathed raggedly into his ear. "Do you see
... what you do to me?"
Dipper turned and looked at Mabel's smiling face in astonishment. "...
Seriously? ... You're saying ... that this ... was  my  fault?" He managed a
smile with the last breath of the sentence.
===============================================================================
A minute or so later, Dipper took Mabel’s head in her hands and kissed her
warmly. “I pronounce myself fit to return to duty!” he declared proudly, and he
started moving his hands down her body.
Mabel brought him up short, grabbing his wrists. She had already decided it was
her turn to take control. “Oh, no! Doc Mabel’s in the house, and  she  says
that a full examination is in order. Starting now!” She launched her hands to
his sides, and set her fingertips and thumbs loose on Dipper's ribs and
stomach, with flanking attacks on his armpits, inner thighs, calves, feet, and
anywhere else she could reach to reduce him to a ticklish, quivering mush.
There was a method to Mabel’s madness. She wanted him defenseless so that she
could get access to his penis. She hoped that Dipper wasn’t apprehensive, as
she  had  accidentally scraped her front teeth along the length of his shaft
the last time she’d tried this last week. That didn’t do much for the mood. She
vowed to be more careful tonight.
In the back of her mind, she was also curious. Mabel was really liking the idea
of taking Dipper’s semen in her mouth for the first time. She had a long
history of tasting and eating practically any edible (and sometimes inedible)
things she laid eyes on. This one was new, and bound to be pretty different!
She knew blow jobs were something lots of girls did, surely it couldn’t be that
bad!
Dipper tried to wrestle back, but he was no match. Laughing and shaking
pitifully, he shrunk down to the bed and wrapped his arms around his lower
torso, attempting protect his sides and stomach from Mabel’s assault. She
pinned his body down under her chest, and pushed his legs apart with her hands,
leaving her target directly in front of her face. She grinned in anticipation:
he must have liked the tickle warfare, because Dipper was hard again.
She carefully wrapped her mouth around the head of the penis, swirling her
tongue around it. Then she opened her jaw wide and slowly lowered her head
down, reaching most of the way to the base before the tip of his four-and-a-
half inches reached the back of her mouth. Then she pulled back, creating
suction, using the saliva on her tongue and lips to glide fluidly over the
smooth skin.
Dipper had barely processed where Mabel was headed when her wet warmth
surrounded the tip. His body continued to shudder, transitioning from laughter
to arousal as his sister seemed to swallow him whole. Seeing her thigh beside
his face as she crouched over him, he managed to pull the leg up over his head,
reached up to grab the cheeks of her butt, and pulled her sex down to his
mouth. Mabel moaned loudly as his tongue found her clitoris again.
The sixty-nine position can be a bit “busy”, and the twins were finding this
out. Receiving and giving oral pleasure can be hard to do at the same time for
the inexperienced. Mabel would stimulate Dipper in a particular way, and he
would pause to tense and moan. Then he would focus, and a special lick or
nibble would cause sparks to start flying behind Mabel’s eyes, and her
attention to Dipper’s genitals would stop.
No, Mabel decided enough was enough, she would not be distracted. Dipper had
already brought her to a tremendous orgasm, and she would concentrate on him no
matter what wonderful thing he would do to her. She pulled off with a mighty
vacuumed smack, then started pistoning her head up and down on his penis. There
was enough spit on it already that she didn’t have to think about producing
more. She moved as quickly as she could, keeping up the lip and tongue
pressure. All the while, she was lightly tickling his scrotum with her
fingertips.
Dipper tried in vain to remember what he should be doing for Mabel, but his
brain was on overload. He was massively turned on by the fact that Mabel was
sucking him off, and that she seemed determined to see it through to the end.
They hadn’t talked about it, but Dipper  really  wanted Mabel to swallow his
sperm. Getting a blow job had been his earliest fantasy since he started being
interested in sex.
But one not-so-small thing was working against Dipper: he had already come,
barely twenty minutes before. Though the rest of his body was incredibly
willing, his testicles simply didn’t have all that much to give. Mabel was
making him very horny, but to force a second orgasm this quickly, much more
physical effort would be needed on his part. His hips had been moving
rhythmically up and down with Mabel’s head motions. Now his thrusting became
more urgent, more pronounced. His grip on Mabel’s butt tightened, and his
entire body rocked in tandem with his hips.
Although her jaw and lips were getting sore and her neck was tiring, Mabel kept
up with Dipper’s rhythm.  Pretty soon, now,  she thought in anticipation.  This
is going to be so cool!
Dipper was getting close, he could feel it, but at the same time he could also
feel that he might not quite get over the top.  Just a little more stimulation
, he thought to himself,  and I can get there!
With a quick motion of his legs and arms, he pushed and rolled himself and
Mabel over, so that he was now on top, his penis still securely in Mabel’s
mouth. Then his hips took over and he pumped vigorously. Several moments later,
he felt an intense tightening.  Yes, there it is!  Dipper’s thoughts screamed
in his mind. Finally, with one last, tremendously tense thrust, he yelled out
in exquisitely beautiful pain, as small quantities of semen jettisoned
forcefully from the end of his penis into Mabel’s throat.
Dipper slowly recovered, kissing her inner thighs and giving her clitoris a few
loving strokes with his tongue. He mumbled his love for her over and over, and
between these proclamations he praised what she had done for him and how that
was one of the sexiest things that he could imagine them doing together. His
penis had softened, but he could still feel that Mabel had it in her mouth.
He then also realized that she hadn’t really moved much at all since he had
finished. Her hands were gripping motionless on his hips. He could feel that
her mouth was slack. Her lower body hadn’t moved in reaction to any of the
attention that he had been giving her. And she wasn't making a sound.
Dipper lifted himself off, turning around toward her. “Mabel?” he asked, the
first touch of concern blooming in his gut as he saw the look on her face.
===============================================================================
Mabel had not enjoyed the end of that experience. At all.
She was not physically hurt in any way, but she was incredibly uncomfortable in
a way she couldn’t describe, even to herself. She had gone in an instant from a
situation where she was performing a loving act for her brother, to where she
felt she had lost all control and thought she could do nothing about what was
happening to her. Mabel had no reference to compare to as Dipper thrust his
penis into and out of her mouth, shoving her head repeatedly against the
mattress. She almost gagged when he pushed himself deep into the back of her
mouth, and released his ejaculation into her throat.
She felt … violated!
Is this what … rape … feels like?  she wondered as Dipper’s penis shrank slowly
in her mouth.
No!  she thought urgently to herself, vaguely aware that Dipper was speaking to
her while touching and kissing parts of her lower body.  This wasn’t rape!
Dipper would have stopped if I’d asked! I could have easily pushed him off!
Dipper did  not  rape me!! He  wouldn’t  rape me!!
Yet as much as she told herself that, she felt disturbed by him as he continued
to stroke and caress her, and murmur expressions of love to her. No, not
disturbed, she felt  repelled  by him!
No!! Don’t feel this way!!  she screamed inside herself.  Dipper loves me! And
I love him!!  Don’t  feel this way!! DON’T FEEL THIS WAY!!!  She kept repeating
the demand in her head over and over.
Dipper’s face suddenly appeared directly in front of her. “ MABEL!! ” Dipper
yelled desperately, right in her face, while he gently grasped her shoulders,
snapping her out of her paralysis.
She focused on him. His face was contorted in shame and fear. Not the imagined
Dipper of a moment ago, but her compassionate brother and lover.
"Dipper?" she cried weakly. Unwittingly, her lower lip began trembling, tears
welling up in her wide eyes, her breath becoming shaky. She sobbed, a thousand
emotions at work. Then she was unable to control herself any longer, and she
completely broke down. Dipper held her tightly in despair, repeating apologies
over and over through his own bitter tears.
Through her wracking sobs, part of Mabel wanted to tell him that it was okay,
to tell him that she knew he hadn’t meant to do that, and that she knew he
would never want to make her feel that way. But the words would not come. It
was all she could do to hold on to him, to silently trust that the arms that
held her would keep her safe.
Dipper was determined to assume every bit of guilt for what Mabel was
experiencing. The touch of her naked body against his own felt shameful now, he
was getting no pleasure from it.
They didn’t know how long they wept together. At some point Dipper had
carefully pulled Mabel to a sitting position, holding her in a protective
embrace. Their cries eventually faded to light sobs and sniffles. Mabel glanced
at Dipper’s bedside clock, and saw that their parents were due back in less
than a half hour.
“We have to get things cleaned up before Mama and Daddy get home,” she said
softly into Dipper’s shoulder.
Dipper squeezed Mabel, and exhaled raggedly. “Okay …” he mumbled. Then he
slouched his head down and got up, turning away, not wanting Mabel to even look
at him.
“It’s all right, Dipper!” she managed to tell him shakily. “It’s okay!!” She
willed herself to believe what she was saying.
He stopped for a moment and closed his eyes. Then he drew a sharp breath and
pressed the heels of his palms to his forehead.   No, it’s not all right , he
thought miserably as he left for the bathroom.
===============================================================================
The twins washed themselves and got into their customary sleepwear, then got to
work. They had to quickly clean up the dishes and correct any evidence of their
activity in Dipper's room and the bathroom. Finally, they sat at the dining
room table to finish up their homework together. They wanted to make sure that
nothing seemed untoward when their parents arrived home, which would be any
minute now.
An undercurrent of severe discomfort ran between the twins, as they worked in
near silence. They had never felt anything like this before.
I'll be okay,  Mabel thought to herself.  I'll be fine! Dipper would  never
try to hurt me. I just really don't want to have to ever do …  that  again.
What if that's a problem for him? I just need a little time, and I’ll be a-
okay! … I hope.
What have I done?  Dipper worried in his head.  She says it's all right, but
it's not! She doesn’t trust me anymore. Will she ever trust me again? I love
her, but she deserves better than me!
In reality, what happened would not have been a big deal for almost any other
couple. It was really just one of those things that didn't quite work out while
having sex together. As Mabel had correctly determined, Dipper had not forced
himself on her: she could have physically or verbally stopped him right from
the instant he started turning them over, or anytime after that. But she had
frozen. She was not prepared for anything like that to happen. And Dipper had
no experience to guide him on how to moderate oneself when one’s sexual urgency
gets too intense.
The truth was that the twins really had been extremely fortunate during their
week-long romance in Oregon, especially since they were so young, and as this
was the first sexual relationship of both of their lives. They had been spoiled
by not experiencing a single uncomfortable or unsatisfying moment between them
up to that point: their sex life together had been essentially perfect. Both
had unrealistic expectations, thinking that sex would always be wonderful and
phenomenal. Now that they had inevitably encountered a very awkward moment, it
had hit them with that much greater force, and they both took it extremely
hard.
When their parents walked in the door, Mabel’s game face was on, her long-term
acting career as the family ham back underway. Their mother asked Dipper how
the evening went, and got a polite but subdued reply. The parents chalked it up
to typical teenage moodiness, nothing to really worry about.
===============================================================================
Later, at bedtime, Dipper was crossing the hall to his bedroom after brushing
his teeth, but stopped. He was compelled to go to Mabel’s room and her partly-
open door. Mabel was on her bed, lying on her stomach and kicking her legs
while reading a teen magazine. Tentatively, Dipper knocked on the door frame,
and Mabel looked up. “Hi, Dip!” she said brightly.
“Hey,” Dipper replied gently, mildly surprised at her good mood, and allowing a
small smile that reflected hers. He eased the door open further. “Bathroom’s
all yours, I’m done.”
“Thanks, Bro Bro! I’m just finishing up this story on Creggy G, and his new
solo career! He’s all big with the environmentalist movement. You know, the
‘tree huggers’? 'Dang, Girl!' Hah hah!!” Smiling widely at her own joke, she
lowered her face back down to the magazine.
Dipper hovered in her doorway, a glimmer of hope flickering inside him. He
glanced up and down the hall. Mom was in their parents’ bedroom, Dad was in the
kitchen, both out of earshot. “Mabel?” he asked quietly.
Mabel looked up again with a smile. “Yeah?”
“... We gonna be okay?” Dipper asked hesitantly.
She paused for a tiny instant. "I think so, Dipper. Just give me a day or two,
all right?” Mabel’s smiling face never changed expression as she again returned
her attention to the magazine. She looked for all the world like she was the
giddy teenage girl everyone knew.
Dipper’s eyes widened, the small smile on his face disappearing in a fraction
of a second. This was her “Mabel” mask, he realized. He reeled, seeing that
even in this private moment, Mabel wasn’t turning “Mabel” off for him. She’d
never done that before.
And he couldn’t believe how painful that felt!
Dipper just wanted to let Mabel know how much he loved her. He could safely
tell her in that moment, their parents couldn’t hear. He could quickly move to
her and hug her, and even give her a few kisses! He could at least walk over to
her and offer a fistbump. There were any number of ways to get that simple
message across to her.
But at that moment, he was convinced she wouldn’t reciprocate.  Nor should she
, he thought to himself. The guilt Dipper felt was stronger than ever: he was
now certain he did not deserve Mabel's love. The sting prevented him from
saying or doing any of those things.
Instead, he decided she was better off without him.
“G’night, Mabel,” he murmured.
Mabel glanced up. “Night, Dipper!” she replied, seemingly happy.
Dipper slowly walked across the hallway to his room, not bothering to say
goodnight to either of his parents. He gently closed the door.
The smile momentarily dropped from Mabel's face when she heard Dipper's door
snap shut, as she tried to keep sadness and pain from overwhelming her. She
forced the smile back again, and continued reading.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 4 *****
===============================================================================
The remainder of the first week of school went by in a haze for the twins, in
their separate ways.
For Mabel, she dedicated all of her waking hours to concentrating on creating
the illusion of normalcy. By all outwards appearances to everyone who knew her,
her acting was perfect. Her parents, neighbors, friends, and teachers only saw
the whirlwind of the Pines family, delighting and flustering everyone around
her just as she always did. Deep inside, she suppressed everything else. The
role that she had taken on, that of “Mabel”, was easier for her to adopt on a
full-time basis than to deal with the real raw emotions she faced in her
relationship with Dipper.
It was hardest at night, alone in her room. With nobody to distract her, nobody
to perform for, her feelings fought to escape. The constant battle to keep her
emotions about Dipper at bay was not conducive to sleep. On Wednesday night,
the night of their disastrous tryst, she could not find any rest at all.
Thursday night, it was after four o’clock when a brief sleep finally claimed
her.
Dipper was not cut out to be the actor Mabel was, nor was he terribly inclined
to hide his dejection from anyone anyways. On Thursday morning, it was obvious
to his mother that something was bothering him, but he wouldn’t tell her what
was wrong.
He was vaguely distracted by schoolwork, but appeared depressed to his friends
and teachers both days at school. Anthony asked Dipper over to his house again.
Ezra privately asked if Dipper wanted to unload anything on him. Both
invitations were gloomily turned down.
After arriving home separately from Mabel on Thursday afternoon, their parents
respected Dipper’s wish to be left alone. His father guessed that perhaps his
son was dealing with a new bully at school, or some other uncomfortable
situation facing a socially awkward introvert in the first week at a new
school. He assured Dipper that he was there if he needed to talk about
anything.
Their mother, however, did find it a touch odd that Mabel appeared unconcerned
by Dipper’s behavior. Normally perking up her brother by whatever means
necessary was the primary job of the “alpha twin” if he got into one of his
sourpuss moods.
===============================================================================
By Friday evening, Mabel’s ability to mask her own fatigue and sorrow was
almost at its limit, and she knew it. She claimed an upset stomach after
supper, got up from the table without a glance at Dipper, and went to her room
and closed her door.
Dipper watched Mabel leave, then turned his attention back to his dinner plate
and his barely-touched food. He knew that her act, trying to carry on as
normal, was tearing her apart.
And I’ve made it even worse for her , he told himself.  At first there was our
secret, which is bad enough, but at least we had each other. Now she’s
completely alone, and hurt, making herself sick, and she can’t tell anyone!
It's all my fault! How could I have done this to her?
His thoughts were so low, to his dismay he found he was right on the brink of
tears, and was about to fall over the edge. He had to get away from his parents
right away! He quickly asked to be excused from the table.
“Dipper,” his mother said with concern, “you’ve not eaten anything! You barely
ate yesterday at dinner, either. Please tell us what’s wrong!”
“It’s nothing, Mom,” Dipper replied quietly, getting up from his chair and
turning toward the hallway to the bedrooms. He hoped they didn’t see the
wetness in his eyes.
His father spoke up sternly. “Dip, being in a bad mood does not give you
license to be rude, or to not clean up your dinner plate.” Dipper did not stop
walking. “You come back here and …”
“Just leave me alone!” he snapped back, not turning his head so that they
couldn’t see the streams now running freely down his cheeks. He hoped his voice
just sounded angry, rather than betray the despair he felt. He strode quickly
to his room and slammed the door.
Mabel heard the commotion as she was getting her nightgown on. She knew Dipper
was still upset about Wednesday night, and she allowed herself to feel her
first twinge of sympathy for someone other than herself in two days. But her
overtired brain would not allow her to mull on the thought any further. She
collapsed into her bed and quickly succumbed to a long, dreamless sleep of
exhaustion.
===============================================================================
Mabel awoke at almost noon on Saturday morning, having been allowed to sleep as
long as she wanted due to her proclamation of stomach illness. She was stiff,
hungry, and terribly in need of going to the bathroom.
Most importantly, though, the long rest had dissolved most of her fear and
confusion about what had happened between herself and Dipper on Wednesday
night. As Mabel rose to sit on the edge of the bed, her heart skipped as she
realized that she badly wanted to reconnect with him again. She had completely
shut him out the last couple of days, and she felt awful about it. She
remembered hearing him storm off to his room last night. She had to talk to
him. She had to let him know she still loved him!
She hadn’t resolved  everything  that was uncomfortable about the events of
Wednesday night. It was still terrifying to recall the helplessness she felt,
the feeling of violation. She never wanted to go through that again, but she
absolutely did not want to lose what she had with Dipper because of it.
Looking outside, she saw that it was a gorgeous day, unusually sunny for the
Bay area. She got dressed in a t-shirt and shorts, and grabbed her Rasta-orange
sweater, tying the sleeves around her waist.
Mabel found she was alone in the house, but heard activity in the backyard. She
looked through the kitchen windows and saw her father digging with a shovel
outside. Mama had been pleading for the backyard renovation since the spring,
and now it looked like Daddy was going to make it happen. Piles of freshly-dug
earth marked where new landscaping features were to be located. She saw stacks
of paving stones, and bricks for a new retaining wall, which must have been
delivered that morning while she slept.
Her father was wearing jeans and a sleeveless undershirt, and judging by the
sheen that covered his body, he was working very hard on this warm day. He
paused his shoveling to speak instructions on where more stones needed to be
dropped. That was when Mabel saw a shirtless Dipper emerge from behind the pile
of landscaping stones, hefting a slab intended for a new walkway. Drenched in
sweat and obviously very tired, he staggered under the load to the prescribed
location, then dropped and placed the stone carefully on the smoothed gravel
surface that their father had built earlier.
She correctly guessed that Daddy had not punished Dipper for his inappropriate
manners the previous night, but was now making up for it. She watched Dipper
closely.
He looks miserable,  she thought, taking in his weary expression and slumped
posture.  But even though his movements betrayed his woe, his sweaty body still
made her feel all tingly from head to toe.  Dipper was no Adonis; skinny, pale,
maybe even gangly, that’s how most people saw him.  But all Mabel could see,
after a good night’s sleep, was what he would look like in a few years.
Dipper, you big dork!  she thought wistfully.  You’re gonna be such a hottie!
For his part, Dipper knew he would pay for his outburst at the dinner table the
previous evening. He endured the back-breaking labor silently. Working for
Grunkle Stan at the Mystery Shack had been beneficial for his work ethic. Mom
was out for a weekend appointment with one of her clients, and Dad was usually
a little easier on him when she wasn’t around. But not today.  Guess I really
pissed him off last night , he thought.  Serves me right, I suppose. I deserve
this!
Dipper heard the sliding door open and close, knowing it was Mabel. Or rather
“Mabel”, he remembered, the air-quotes name for the character she played for
everyone, including himself now.  That's the way it should be,  he thought
bitterly.  She should shun me for the rest of my life, for what I've done to
her!  He finished the placement of the heavy slab, avoiding looking up.
"Hey Pumpkin!" called out their father to Mabel. "Good to see you up. Feeling
better?"
"Better than the two of you, I bet," she replied sympathetically, as the heat
of the day hit her. She looked around to their neighbors' hilly backyards
through the mature trees and over low fences, seeing many people relaxing
rather than working. "I assume Mama must have some pretty cray-cray blackmail
on file about you, Daddy, cause I can't think of a worse way than this to spend
the day!"
Stopping to lean on the handle of the shovel, and glancing at Dipper and back
again, their father sighed. "Yeah, that file's pretty thick, actually!" he said
with a half-smile. "But your brother and I had some things to work on here, so
this is on  me  today." He paused, addressing Dipper's slouched back as his son
arrived at the stack to retrieve another stone. "You're still not much for
conversation today, Dip, but I do appreciate how hard you're working. Thank
you!" he said sincerely.
Dipper crouched down with bent knees, preparing to lift another of the
seemingly endless supply of stones. He looked up briefly to his father, nodded
acknowledgement, then grunted as he started back toward the path with his new
load. He stared down at the ground in front of him as he walked. He couldn't
look at Mabel. He wouldn't. Dipper had convinced himself that he was
responsible for all of her pain, and she deserved to not be subjected to his
attention.
"You both look  way  too overheated!" Mabel said. "Daddy, I want to make some
real lemonade for you guys. Can you go get some lemons from the market?"
"My rubber arm has been duly twisted!" he replied immediately, smiling broadly.
"You know I can't resist your lemonade! But please, no plastic dinosaurs! And
we can use a rest and time to get something to eat." Again, he turned to
Dipper. "You can take a break until after lunch, Dip."
Dipper laid down the stone and started positioning it on the path. "It's okay,"
he replied sullenly. "I'll keep working on this until you get back."
Their father shook his head sadly as he picked up his overshirt and headed
toward the house. He stopped briefly beside Mabel. "See what you can do to
cheer him up, Pumpkin?" he whispered.
She nodded earnestly. He patted her shoulder as he walked past her. "You're a
great sister," he murmured appreciatively to her.
Mabel watched Dipper walk tiredly back to the pile of stones.  No,  she thought
to herself, biting her bottom lip to keep tears at bay.  He's a great brother!
===============================================================================
Moments later, with their father on his way to the nearest grocery store many
blocks away, Mabel walked slowly to Dipper. He had his back to her, wrestling
more paving stones from the pile and standing them up. She hadn't really spoken
to him at all since Wednesday, just a few cursory comments around the house,
trying to make "Mabel" appear authentic. This was going to be their first time
actually talking since the uncomfortable incident.
Her subconscious, it seems, had other plans. Unbidden, a quick flashback of
their last sexual contact entered her mind. It stopped her in her tracks. With
effort, she forced the experience away.
No, I will  not  feel this! Not now!  She resumed her slow walk, just a few
yards away to her brother.
Dipper heard the soft footfalls behind him.  She's going to blame me , he
thought with dread.  That’s why she sent Dad to the store. She should hit me.
Maybe she’ll use Dad’s shovel.  He stopped his work, but kept his back to
Mabel, accepting of whatever his sister wanted to do to him.
He felt her punch him … but it wasn’t remotely hard enough.  Barely more than
what it felt like to bump into a door frame.  He reluctantly turned to face the
music.
And for the second time that week, he found Mabel presenting her fist to him.
Her face was wet, her mouth turned up in a trembling, lopsided smile.
Dipper’s poise disappeared, as he was unprepared for Mabel to want to be
forgiving of him, to communicate love to him. Hormones he never knew existed
flooded through his body, overwhelming him. He staggered, needing to grasp the
pile of landscaping bricks. Mabel caught him. He disbelievingly allowed himself
to be guided unsteadily to the ground, where they knelt in front of each other.
Mabel's heart was breaking to see Dipper's sadness and shame.
Tears mixed with the sweat on his face. His chest struggled, unable to draw a
breath. He looked at her with desperate eyes. "I’m … I'm  so  sorry!" he
finally managed to choke faintly.
"I know," she wept quietly, pulling him gently into her arms. "I know ... I'm
sorry too!"
Both of them broke down then, sobbing uninhibited into each other's shoulders.
They clutched each other tightly for several minutes, allowing their shared
grief and the enormous pressure of their secret to be released.
"Are you kids alright?" called a concerned voice.
It was Mrs. Zeidenberg, their neighbor in the home next to theirs. She and her
husband were an older retired couple who had been in the neighborhood long
before the Pines family moved there. She had walked over to the low fence to
see how her neighbor's landscaping project was coming along, when she saw the
twins huddled and crying together.
Dipper and Mabel separated quickly and clumsily, unsuccessfully trying to
regain their composure. Mabel panicked over how they must have appeared. Dipper
was thankful that at least they hadn't been kissing.
"Yeah, we're fine!" he blurted in a quivering voice, standing up and trying to
wipe his face with his dirty hands.
Mrs. Zeidenberg's eyes narrowed slightly. They could tell she was concerned,
and very curious. "Are you sure?"
Amazingly, a perfectly plausible story came to Dipper. He didn't even have to
lie! "It's okay,” he sniffed, helping Mabel to her feet. “I was just … helping
Mabel through some stuff ... boy troubles.” He looked over to his sister.
“She's … having problems with some big jerk of a guy." His voice broke as he
placed his arm protectively around her shoulder.
Mabel looked back at her brother and immediately picked up the ball. "Yeah ...
and Dipper's got a thing for this messed up girl, too!" she said haltingly,
sliding her hand around his bare waist and giving him a squeeze. She turned
back to their neighbor with a small smile. "We were just trying to make each
other feel better!"
The older woman smiled sweetly. "Oh, goodness! You two are just the nicest
pair! You are  awfully  lucky to have each other to lean on!" she told them
fondly. "I’m sorry to bother you, I'll leave you alone now. Good luck, kids!"
She turned back towards her house.
The twins' adrenaline was pumping from the close call, hearts pounding, panting
lightly. They were alone again, but remained in plain view of the backyards of
at least four other houses. Still with an arm around each other, they looked
around, then at each other.
Mabel spoke first in a harsh whisper. "The house!"
"Definitely the house!" Dipper whispered back without hesitation.
They ran to the patio door, barely closing it behind them before urgently
grabbing each other. Their mouths came fiercely together, their arms forcing
their bodies together securely. Both of them were desperate to replace the
emptiness they had been feeling, wanting to feel love again as quickly and as
strongly as possible.
They stumbled to Mabel's bedroom and collapsed together on her bed. Both knew
what they needed without even speaking. They intertwined their bare legs,
wrapped their arms as far around as they could, pressed their chins to the side
of each other's necks, and squeezed with every muscle in their bodies. The
catharsis was almost immediate, the remainder of their heartache seemingly
washed away after a minute or so of the intense, intimate embrace.
They backed off a bit and rested their heads on the mattress, kissing gently,
their noses touching lightly together, their moist eyes peering directly at one
another. They started smiling even before they spoke.
"I love you so much," they said softly in unison, smiles broadening into wide
grins.  Still twins!
Wrapping themselves together for another squeeze, Dipper happily sighed, "You
were absolutely right, Mabel. I hereby approve of the name 'not-so-awkward-
sibling-hug'. It's got a nice ring to it!" Mabel hummed in agreement,
contentedly holding Dipper’s sweaty body close to her own.
They heard the car door slam in the driveway outside, startling them. Eyes wide
and quickly scrambling to their feet, they dashed out to the kitchen. In a low
voice, Mabel cheekily said, "Well,  that  was almost an  extremely -awkward-
sibling-hug!" Dipper didn’t see the humor in the situation as their father
walked in the side door carrying a bag of produce.
===============================================================================
Life didn't exactly return to "normal" for Dipper and Mabel after that, but
compared to the previous few days, things were a cake walk.
The twins avoided their parents’ gentle prompts on what had been wrong with
Dipper, and what Mabel had done to cheer him up. Dipper called it “just some
stuff at school.” Mabel, always loathe to lie, told them she “hugged it out of
him!” They were satisfied with the vague explanations, happy to just have
Dipper back to his normal self.
That evening, after the kids got dressed for sleep, Dipper went to conspire
quietly in Mabel’s room for several minutes. They sat on her bed, a discrete
distance maintained between them. Mabel wanted to hold him again, to be able to
reconnect with those feelings that had been interrupted that morning before
lunch. Dipper had to reign in Mabel’s enthusiasm, reminding her of what they
discussed in Oregon and on the bus ride home. It was risky, all it would take
would be their father or mother opening her bedroom door at any time. Getting
caught even in an affectionate embrace would be difficult enough to explain.
And he asked her if they had ever been able to limit themselves to just
hugging. Grumbling, she agreed with him.
“All right, I’ll try to back off. But you owe me two things!” Mabel told her
brother.
Dipper raised an eyebrow. “Only two?”
“Two  new  things!” she retorted. “First, you never replied to  this  outside
today.” She held her fist up towards him. She found his smile adorable as he
returned the fistbump. They found they couldn’t pull back their fists quite so
easily, so they kept them pushing together.
“Second,” she said in a much lower voice, “on Wednesday night, you owe me
everything you’ve got stored up down  there!”  pointing at his crotch with her
other hand and smiling wickedly. “We’re going to be able to go back to doing
things the  right  way!”
Dipper blushed, his breathing starting to become more labored. He was very
aware of his penis hardening inside his sleeping shorts. He reluctantly stood
up from the bed, smiled ruefully and shook his head at his seductress. “See,
this  is why we need to be careful!” he said quietly, gesturing down to the
rising tent pole in his crotch. “Now I’ve got to get back to my room looking
like this!”
Mabel just continued to give him her smirk. “Sweet dreams, Bro Bro!”
Dipper blushed deeper. “Guaranteed! G’night, Mabel!”
“Night, Dipper!” replied Mabel gleefully, as Dipper cracked open the door,
looked both ways, then closed her door behind him.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 5 *****
===============================================================================
Wednesday was taking altogether too long to arrive for Mabel’s liking. By
Tuesday, the previous few days had been a fearsome test of her long-term acting
ability. She had successfully deprived herself off any outwardly-visible signs
of affection for Dipper, but it had been a struggle. It seemed such a cruel
hand to be dealt, to be so near to the love of her life, and for them to be
forced to only be brother and sister.
She idly remembered a joking comment that Dipper had made the evening they had
returned from the pivotal weekend in Portland back to Gravity Falls, just over
two weeks ago. Dipper had offhandedly said that he almost wished that they
didn’t have to live together: that it might be easier to not have to see each
other all the time, and be somehow less painful. Part of Mabel was actually
starting to consider the pros and cons of such an idea, though the rest of her
hated that part for having such thoughts.
Still, questioning her decision of how to adapt to her new lot in life never
occurred to her. Originally, the plan had been that both of them would try to
actually put their feelings on the back burner, that they make an attempt to
truly cool their emotions for one another until they were eighteen. Mabel had
tossed that plan away the very night they arrived home, deciding instead to
hide  her feelings instead of losing them. Even the terrible feelings of
violation from last week had not budged her opinion that she would never,  ever
deny to herself her love for her brother.
Dipper, on the other hand, was more pragmatic. To him, actually losing Mabel
from his life was the worst possible outcome. He never meant the comment about
not living together, as he would rather deal with the discomfort of living
together platonically than to be separated. He also knew the danger of being
separated forcibly, rather than voluntarily. And that could happen anytime they
made a mistake. Dipper knew that risk avoidance is all about not allowing an
event to happen in the first place. To that end, he still agreed with the
advice that Grunkle Stan had given them just before they came home: it would be
best if they actually tried to end the romantic part of their relationship.
Difficult? Yes. Painful? Without a doubt. But impossible? No. Not impossible.
Unless, of course, your sister completely abandons that plan immediately after
you arrive home, and finding opportunity to talk about these things becomes
really, really difficult!
Dipper found himself stuck in between. He didn’t have the acting ability or the
emotional stomach to go the full-Mabel route, not without making a mistake. But
he also couldn’t just completely let go of his intense feelings, a proposition
made even more difficult by Mabel apparently insisting on Wednesdays being the
designated sex nights. He resolved to attempt to turn everything he felt about
Mabel “off” every other opportunity he had, and see how that worked.
So it was on Tuesday night, as the Pines family was eating supper. Their
parents always insisted on eating together at the dining room table whenever
possible. After saying prayers and being thankful for the meal, they started
discussing their day as they ate.
While their mother and father were talking about one of their mother’s clients,
Mabel noticed Dipper slouching in his seat directly across from her. Figuring
his legs were probably stuck out in front of him, she couldn’t resist the
opportunity to play “footsies”. She moved her foot to find and caress his legs
beneath the table.
At the first contact, Dipper thought it  might  have been an innocent touch,
but that possibility went out the window as he felt Mabel’s foot slide up, then
down his calf. He stared intently at Mabel, but she was dutifully filling her
fork with food from her plate.  I’d be impressed with her multitasking if this
weren’t such a serious situation,  he thought to himself.
He straightened up in his chair and pulled his legs back, ending the tease.
When she threw him a questioning look, he shot a warning look back. He felt a
little bad when he saw a hurt expression cross her face, then it was gone as
their mother asked her a question about her school day.
Dipper hoped that they would have a chance tomorrow night to talk about how
taking an unnecessary risk could be  really bad  for their relationship.
Mabel hoped that they would have a chance tomorrow night to talk about how
taking a minimal risk could be  really good  for their relationship.
===============================================================================
The twins had a good day at school the next day. Dipper, Ezra, and Anthony made
plans to start a new informal school club for role-playing game enthusiasts.
They figured that they may as well stake their claim officially as the new
school nerds, since it would be less uncomfortable to proclaim the title
themselves than to be labelled after the fact by the other idiots at school.
Mabel and her friends all excitedly had auditioned for the school’s drama club.
The school was planning on a musical production of “Hairspray”, and although
Mabel had to admit that her singing skills, though undoubtedly enthusiastic,
were somewhat limited, she still eagerly anticipated the chance to participate.
Mostly though, she silently squirmed in anticipation of the evening to come at
home with Dipper.
Per routine, the twins walked with Anthony and Sandra. Against routine, Anthony
and Sandra found something to talk about separate from Dipper and Mabel.
Anthony’s brother had played the original John Waters movie of “Hairspray” for
him, while Sandra had seen the musical, and they were comparing the differences
between them. They laughed over which guy at school should play the part of
Tracy’s mother. A natural spark formed between the two of them, which Mabel
found incredibly cute. Even Dipper noticed them, and envied that if they were
to get together, they wouldn’t have the obstacles he and Mabel faced.
When they got home, their mother was home as per normal, but was also occupied
with client calls as usual. She worked from home out of an office that the
family had converted from what was supposed to be a guest bedroom on the
opposite side of the house from the other bedrooms, and presently, as on most
days, was engrossed with one, or possibly many clients. Their father was still
at work, as he typically was until almost six. When the twins came home and
passed by the office, their mother waved silently with her ear glued to her
phone.
Before Dipper could get distracted by a video game or turning on the computer,
Mabel grabbed him by the hand and dragged him to her room. She shut the door,
then pinned him to the back of her door and urgently pressed her lips onto his,
while snaking her arms around his neck and back and pulling him close.
Dipper was unprepared for the assault, but decided they were safe enough and
gladly submitted. His own arms were quickly around Mabel’s body, and his tongue
found hers. Both of them were getting wound up, excited despite the fact their
mother was under the same roof.
Mabel felt the front of Dipper’s pants, moaning into his mouth at the lump that
she knew was forming there. She pulled him across the room to her dresser,
where a towel was waiting, left there that morning in anticipation of this
moment. She grabbed the towel and pulled Dipper back over towards her bed.
Mabel dropped the towel there and started fumbling with the button and zipper
on Dipper’s pants. Dipper broke off the kiss in alarm, but before he could
object, Mabel breathed “Just trust me! And be quiet!” then she continued her
work releasing his penis from his pants. It was fully erect and ready as she
pulled his pants and underwear down to his knees.
She then spun him around, making Dipper face the bed, and reached around to
grasp his penis with her right hand while she held his chest and right shoulder
securely with her left arm. Mabel then started jacking back and forth quickly,
feeling Dipper’s body tense with pleasure. A strangled grunt of arousal emitted
from his throat, followed by desperate panting.
“Pick up the towel,” she breathed into his ear as she continued his
stimulation, “and get ready!”
Dipper understood, managing to grasp the towel and hold it in front of himself
as Mabel maintained her rapid movement on his sensitive organ.
Seconds later, her efforts reached fruition. Dipper suddenly tensed his whole
body, then exploded into the towel, while making pitiful noises that he muffled
within his closed mouth.
Mabel stopped her masturbation of her surprised twin, and held him close to
herself. He continued panting slowly, amazed at what his sister was able to do
to him so quickly. He whispered his approval through quiet gasps “That … was
awesome! … I love you!”
“I love you, too!” she murmured back, turning Dipper back around to face her
and pull him into her arms, clutching his heaving body. Then she suddenly put
her lips to his ear. “That’s Round One!” she rasped. “You owe me Round Two!
I’ll see you later, Sir Dipshit!”
With that, Mabel released her grip on Dipper and strode to the door. She did
crack the door first to make sure no parents were waiting on the other side,
then with an evil grin flung the door open.  Dipper frantically started pulling
up his pants and underwear while Mabel watched with satisfaction, then she
sauntered out to the kitchen to prepare an after-school snack, leaving her
bedroom door wide open.
Dammit, Mabel!  Dipper cursed inwardly, finishing doing up his pants.  You
can’t keep doing things like that! We’ve  got  to be more careful!
===============================================================================
Soon afterward, the family had eaten their dinner, and the twins’ parents left
for their bible study. The car wasn’t even out of the driveway when Mabel
sprinted to her room. “Be right ba-aack!” she called out, then slammed her
door.
Dipper walked over to the living room sofa and sat down nervously. He wondered
to himself what his crazy sister had planned for him, knowing that she’d been
concocting something since last weekend. The thinking itself ate up any time he
had to prepare.
A few minutes later Dipper had his answer. He heard Mabel’s door open, and then
odd-sounding steps coming down the hallway. He turned to watch as she appeared
from around the corner.
His mouth dropped open.  Holy shit!  he thought. It was the same thought and
facial reaction he’d had in Portland when he’d seen Mabel in the same outfit.
Well,  some  of the same outfit.
Mabel’s smile was huge and dazzling as she posed provocatively for Dipper with
her hands on her hips. She had dug into her closet for some of the clothes she
hadn’t worn in some time. He recognized the black beret perched neatly on top
of her head. She had on her darkest sunglasses. Her old black leather jacket
was a bit too small and was unzipped, revealing what she wore beneath.
Which, as Dipper observed in stunned silence, was not much. Mabel proudly
showed off the bikini,  the  bikini, that she had briefly teased Dipper with in
Portland. Also black, like the rest of her ensemble, it was smaller than any
swimsuit either twin had ever seen. The top consisted of two tiny triangles of
fabric that managed to cover only the barest portion of Mabel’s small breasts,
connected by skinny elastic threads. The thong bottoms were a slightly larger
triangle connected together by the same impossibly skinny elastic. The contours
of her camel toe were clearly defined, and it was obvious that she shaved her
pubic hair.
Completing the look was the black high heel shoes she had purchased with the
bikini. They successfully forced Mabel’s posture into a sultry stance, so that
she arched her back and thrust her breasts out.
Mabel was having the time of her life.  I get to play dress up, and wind up
Dipper at the same time! What combination could be better? Wait’ll he gets a
load of this!  She struck another pose, leaning her shoulders back against the
wall, raising one foot to rest against the wall behind her and raising her arms
above her head, spreading out the open jacket. Her smile widened even further
as she watched Dipper’s awed expression. She slowly took off her glasses and
dropped them to the floor, then removed the beret and tossed it playfully to
Dipper on the sofa.
She posed again, this time turning and bending over at the waist to lean
forward against the wall, arching her back and prominently showing off her
essentially naked behind while supporting herself on her forearms. She turned
her head back to Dipper and slowly licked her upper lip seductively. Mabel
couldn’t get enough of the way her brother was so obviously turned on by her.
Mabel was also getting herself worked up to a fever pitch. She had only
masturbated once in the past week, and that was Saturday afternoon after she
and Dipper had made up. Days of unreleased sexual tension were struggling to
escape. She wiggled her index finger deliberately, beckoning Dipper to come
join her.
In a daze, Dipper slowly made his way to Mabel, in the back of his mind
thankful that she was staying in the back of the room, largely away from the
big window that looked out onto the street. He approached her inviting ass, a
small moan coming from his mouth as he palmed both of her cheeks gently. Mabel
had her head turned back toward him, an aroused and seriously overjoyed look on
her face.  She actually likes doing this!  Dipper saw.  She’s not demeaning
herself for my sake. She  wants  to be the tease!
He slid his hand up her back beneath the jacket as he moved to her side. He
cupped her face with his other hand and kissed her deeply, satisfied humming
emitting from both of them. Dipper was thinking that this was a little awkward,
both of them bent over with their faces pressed up next to the wall, so he
tried to guide Mabel to straighten up.
Mabel pulled away and refused to move. “No,” she said quietly but firmly.
“Right here!” Her voice grew huskier. “Right now!”
The tone and intensity of her voice made Dipper’s penis snap even more to
attention. He kissed her hard on the mouth, then maneuvered his head under her
to kiss and run his tongue down the front of her body, down to her belly
button. He moved the hand that had been up her back down over her butt, then
slowly between her legs, moving the thong aside. As he straightened up to move
behind Mabel, he gently found the entrance to her vagina and eased his middle
finger inside. Mabel tensed in anticipation, and Dipper was surprised she was
already so wet. He unfastened his pants, for a second looking back to the
living room window, and wondered if anyone could see in if they were trying.
Oh, hell, who am I kidding?  he thought quickly.  There’s no way I’m stopping
now!
Mabel was beside herself. Dipper’s trail of kisses down the front of her body
was just torture. Being naughty was making her hornier than she could stand!
After his pants and underwear were at his ankles, Dipper started to pull down
at the strings of the bikini bottom. Mabel whined back to him, “Don’t bother!
Just do it  now! ”
Dipper didn't need to be told twice. Pulling the thong aside again, he used his
other hand to aim his penis to her slick opening. When he felt himself starting
to slide in, he grasped Mabel's hips and pushed himself in with a single
thrust, holding himself in. Mabel loudly moaned her approval. " Please! " she
gasped urgently, unfocused eyes staring straight ahead to the wall. "Ooh,
please, Dipper! I need this so bad!"
Dipper smiled, cocked his head to the side with raised eyebrows, and muttered
“Oka-ay!”
Gripping harder to her waist, Dipper started fucking Mabel vigorously. They had
done it “doggie” style once before, but never standing up, and never with as
much urgency, so he slipped out a couple of times when he pulled back too fast.
He wasn’t pushing in fully, because he thought he would slam Mabel’s face into
the wall. But soon he was pulling back on her with his hands, coordinated with
his thrusts, so she wouldn’t be hammered forward so hard. The living room was
now filled with the sound of Dipper’s pelvis smacking solidly and repeatedly
into Mabel’s butt, mixed with the groans of two very aroused teenagers.
Mabel loved the feeling of Dipper's penis slamming into her, but this position
was getting tiring. Her grunts started to sound frustrated as she struggled to
build up to her climax.
Dipper was in no hurry, his prior orgasm having taken the edge off his need to
come. He could feel the tickle, and knew he could come again if he tried, but
he wanted to concentrate on satisfying his sister. He pushed in hard, bent
forward over Mabel and used his left hand against the wall to support his
weight, his fingers finding hers and intertwining with them. With his right
hand, he reached around Mabel's waist, and his first two fingers found her
clitoris. As he started rubbing her sensitive button, he used his wrist and
forearm to pull her back into himself, and began to thrust in shorter, but much
faster, strokes.
He knew immediately that he was on the right track. Mabel's noises became
louder and higher-pitched. Dipper felt her pushing back against him on each
thrust.
"Oh, God!" Mabel cried, gripping Dipper's fingers tightly in her own. "Don't
stop!" Dipper tried to increase his pace, matching the speed of his hips to his
fingers' massaging of her clitoris.
Mabel lowered her chin to her chest and let out a strangled wail as a
tremendous orgasm smashed over her. Dipper lovingly kept up the rhythm,
continuing to stimulate Mabel through peak after peak of pleasure.  She
deserves every ounce of joy I can give her , he thought happily.
After what seemed like forever, it became too much for Mabel. Her legs gave out
beneath her, and Dipper couldn't hold both of them up. The twins collapsed into
a pile on the floor, Mabel curled up and gasping helplessly for breath, while
Dipper rolled over and sat with his back to the wall while panting and laughing
at their clumsy predicament.
Mabel had drawn enough air to turn her head and gaze at her lover. “Hot …
effing  … Belgian … waffles!” she managed to get out. She gave him a salute,
then reached out with her hand, and Dipper grasped it. “You, sir ... are
incredible!” she proclaimed with an exhausted smile, shaking his hand as if in
congratulations. “Don’t you  ever  stop making me feel this way!”
“I promise!” Dipper replied. “I love you, Mabel. I’ll do anything for you!”
“Yeah? Good … I’ll remember that!” Mabel said mischievously, still panting.
“Start by explaining … why  this ,” Mabel reached over and lightly grasped
Dipper’s slick penis, “is still hard! … What happened to Round two?”
Dipper made a little gasp as Mabel started gently jacking him. “What can I say?
You did a …” he was forced to pause for another long intake of breath, “...
much  better job with Round one than I’m used to!” He paused, and stroked her
cheek affectionately. "Plus, I held back a bit ..." closing his eyes and
gasping again, "to make sure I made you feel good first." Dipper's voice went
up at the end as Mabel's hand continued its work.
Mabel got to her knees and crawled over to Dipper. She held the back of his
head with her free hand and kissed him deeply, while slightly speeding up her
stroking of his penis with her other hand. He moaned helplessly into her mouth.
"No more holding back," she ordered quietly. She released his penis and cupped
his scrotum, while giving him a smoldering stare. "I want  all  of this!
Understood, Sir Dipshit?"
"Aye, Captain!" Dipper grinned, not caring that he had mixed their role-playing
metaphors.
Mabel planted another kiss, then got up off of her brother. They got to their
feet, Dipper managing despite his ankles still being anchored together by his
pants and underwear. Mabel laughed as he half-shuffled, half-hopped his way
behind her down the hallway, catching up to her outside his room.
He embraced her waist and inhaled on her mouth, while starting to guide them
through his doorway. But Mabel felt a tiny prick of apprehension, which she
knew was linked to last Wednesday night, and what happened the last time she
was on Dipper's bed. She subtly turned them back around to her room instead.
Dipper yanked down the leather jacket off of Mabel's shoulders, followed by
Mabel pushing his shirt up over his head. He fumbled with the knots of the
bathing suit for a few moments, before she told him to take care of his own
pants, socks, and shoes, and she'd handle the swimsuit and her stilettos. They
were quickly naked and back into each other's enthusiastic arms, necking with
abandon.
Mabel pulled Dipper backward to her bed, leaning back so Dipper would flop on
top of her. Giggling, they fumbled their way higher on the bed, then Mabel
spread her legs wide and reached for Dipper's penis. He let her pull him down
to her, lining him up with her vagina.
He pushed into her easily as their mouths and bodies merged again, accompanied
by incredible feelings of satisfaction and completion by both of the siblings.
Dipper moved his hips slowly and gently, humming happily through their
passionate kisses, his arms holding her close. Mabel wrapped her legs around
Dipper's behind, rocking in slow rhythm with him, gliding her hands over his
whole body.
The twins simply made love, tenderly attempting to somehow fuse their bodies
and souls together. They took their time, unabashedly free for the moment from
the world that made their love forbidden.
This is just so natural, so perfect!  Dipper thought.  How could this possibly
be wrong?
I can't imagine loving anyone more,  Mabel thought,  or being any happier! I
don't want this moment to end!
Eventually, their breathing became heavier as the pace of their dance gradually
quickened. They broke their kissing to just stare in awe into each other's
eyes, their sweating foreheads pressing together. Their desire built, their
bodies moving together more fervently, ragged breaths joining passionate noises
of pure adoration. They could feel that they were getting close, and they knew
that they would climax together. And still they couldn't stop gazing at each
other.
They both knew it was coming, and that by now it was corny, but they didn't
care because it was  right . "I love you so much!" they panted urgently to each
other in unison. Smiling in unbelievable happiness, they began to press their
mouths together again, ready to hold each other tightly through the exquisitely
perfect finish that would come in just a few moments ...
… when they heard the sound of their father’s voice at the other end of the
house, as he came through the side door. "Hey kids! We're back! Bible study was
canceled."
Dipper and Mabel froze, gaping in horrified shock at Mabel's wide-open bedroom
door, then at each other.
"Kids?" came their father's voice again.
"Shit!" they whispered desperately in unison.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 6 *****
===============================================================================
“Where are they?” the twins heard their father asking their mother, then in a
louder voice, “Dipper! Mabel!”
Eyes wide with panic, Dipper quickly jumped back from Mabel, flinching in pain
as his foreskin did not unroll back up on its own as he pulled out. Mabel was
unable to move, instinctively holding tightly to Dipper’s shoulders. Both were
terrified, trying desperately to calm their gasping breaths.
The inside of Mabel’s room was not visible from the main part of the house, but
they knew that the full length of the bedroom hallway was. Dipper had no way to
dash out of Mabel’s room across the hall to his own room without being seen.
He whispered frantically. “ Answer him!! ” as he forced himself out of Mabel’s
grip and to his feet.
“I’m here! In my room!” Mabel called, trying to gather her wits, looking around
for her clothes that she had changed out of when her parents left. She spied
them on her dresser. Dipper tip-toed to the door and closed it carefully.
“What are you doing?” came the voice of their mother, who they could tell was
curious because of the long pause before Mabel’s reply.
Mabel was on her feet, and bent over to gather up her bikini and jacket, and
flung them under her bed. Dipper picked up his clothes and shoes. “Nothing,
Mama!” she called back loudly, the shake in her voice obvious to anyone who was
listening.
Their mother was closer now. “That doesn’t sound like nothing, Pumpkin!” she
replied with a touch of authority in her voice. “What’s going on? Why did you
leave your sunglasses on the floor out here? And where’s Dipper?”
Dipper was looking around in desperation.  She’s going to come in here!  he
screamed to himself.  I’ve got to find a place to hide!  He dashed quietly to
Mabel’s closet and opened it, finding it completely filled with boxes and
clothes.  Seriously? Thanks Mabel!
“Please don’t come in, Mama!!” Mabel cried. She gestured hysterically to Dipper
for him to get under her bed.
The voice of their mother came from directly outside the bedroom door now. “Why
not, Mabel? Your door was open, now it’s closed. Just answer me, and I won’t
think you’re up to something!”
Dipper scrambled to the floor, shoving his clothes ahead of him, barely able to
squeeze beneath the bed frame. He was thankful for once that he was so skinny.
Mabel grabbed her clothes from her dresser and threw them to the bed, rifling
for her underwear. “I’m just changing my clothes, Mama!!” She kicked at
Dipper’s foot which was still visible beneath the end of the bed. The foot
swiftly disappeared.
“Well, you haven’t got anything I haven’t seen before!” her mother replied, not
being satisfied with the honesty of Mabel’s answer. She turned the handle and
opened the door.
Mabel screeched, trying to cover her breasts with one arm and her crotch with
her other hand. Her mother looked in uncomfortable surprise at her young
daughter’s sweaty, disheveled body, not prepared for this to be quite what she
would be barging in on. Mabel leaped on the bed to dive under her covers, the
impact of her jump hitting Dipper solidly on his head through the mattress and
box spring. He silently winced in pain.
“Mama!! Please get out!!” Mabel screamed in embarrassment.
“What on earth is going on?” called their father from just down the hall.
Mabel turned up the volume even higher. “Stay away, Daddy!!”
“It’s okay, Baby,” their mother told her husband, as she started to think she
knew what was going on with their daughter. “I’ll handle this!” she said,
entering Mabel’s bedroom and closing the door on him before he could come
closer.
Their father wasn’t finished on the other side of the door. “Mabel, where is
Dipper?” Under the bed, Dipper froze even more than he already had been.
Mabel tried to think quick. “He said he got a call from one of his friends. I
don’t know where he is!” she cried out.
“All right. I’ll leave you two be.” their father said.
Dipper’s heart leapt to his throat. His cell phone was in his pants pocket, and
his pants were behind him somewhere under the bed with him! And with Mom in the
room, I can’t move to find it and turn off the ringer! If Dad calls me, it’s
all over!
“Mama!” Mabel pleaded pitifully, wrapped up to her neck in her bedsheets.
“Please … just leave me alone! Just go!”
“Pumpkin,” her mother said, much softer now, sitting on the corner of Mabel’s
bed, “don’t worry … I understand … the feelings you must be going through at
your age … you want to do things with yourself ...”
“Mama!” Mabel whined again, mortified and trying to get her mother to stop.
Dipper tried to control his breathing, knowing that his Mom’s foot was just
inches away from his knee.
Their mother was determined to get her point across. “Just know … just know
that I’m sorry for waltzing in here without understanding. I think I know
better now.” She paused, drew a breath, then continued. “If it makes you feel
any better … I was doing the same things that you were just doing when I was
your age.”
She had intended to imply that she had masturbated at fourteen: instead, Mabel
and Dipper both conjured up the same mental image: their mother as a young
teenager, on her back and being rutted by a young version of her brother Steve.
“Ewww!!” Mabel blurted out in revulsion, drawing a bemused expression from her
mother. Under the bed, Dipper struggled not to cough in disgust.
“All right, all right, I guess I’ve embarrassed you enough!” her mother told
her with an understanding smile. “I’ll make sure that your father never speaks
of this!” She got to her feet and started toward the door, then stopped. “I’m
sorry for not bringing up any of these things before this. If you change your
mind and want to talk, I’ll be here. I love you, Pumpkin.”
“Love you, too,” Mabel squeaked back, not budging an inch from under the
sheets. Their mother left the room, closing the door shut behind her. They
could hear their father’s questioning tone, then both voices faded as their
parents walked away down the hallway towards the living room.
Dipper carefully extracted himself from under Mabel’s bed, reaching back to
pull out his clothes with him. He began fishing in the pocket of his pants for
his phone.
“Oh my God! Dipper, that was  so  embarrassing!” Mabel said quietly, but
excitedly. “Even if it’s not what she meant, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to
look at Uncle Steve again! Bleaah! I can’t believe how …” Dipper sternly
signalled to Mabel to stop talking. Mabel acknowledged him silently.
Dipper was all business now. He was scared out of his mind, for they were not
nearly out of danger, but the short time under the bed had given him time to
think about what he needed to do next. Finding the phone, Dipper quickly found
the ringer settings and set it to “mute”. After a short exhale of relief, he
grabbed his clothes and started pulling them on. He whispered an order to Mabel
that she needed to get her clothes on as well.
When they both were fully dressed, Dipper used hushed tones to outline his plan
to Mabel.
"Okay, good job saying I’m out of the house. So if I’m coming back from
visiting a friend, let’s say Anthony, I have to come back into the house
through the front door, right?” Mabel nodded agreement. “Obviously, now I
actually have to get outside. First things first, I have to get out of this
room. I'll be seen by Mom or Dad if I go out through your door, so no way
around it, the only other way is out your window. There's a screen that has to
come off, and I highly doubt you have a set of screwdrivers in your room!"
Mabel shook her head. "Didn't think so! So since I can't go get it, you have to
go into my room and get my set. It's in the 2nd drawer in my desk, buried under
a bunch of crap in the left side of the drawer. I think. I hope. Be careful, I
think I might have also stuffed some dirty underwear in that drawer one time a
couple of months ago when Mom told me to clean my room.” Mabel's face was
slowly contorting in disgust. "Well ... you'll see when you get there! Once you
bring that back here, you'll have to help me hold the screen after I unscrew
the clips, because we can't let the screen fall down. There's about a seven
foot drop to the ground under your window, I hope I can make the jump without
making any noise. Or … breaking my leg, for that matter." Mabel was looking at
Dipper, trying to determine just how confident he was in this plan. "Then I
sneak around the side of the house …” he paused, “... somehow get over the
chain link fence, haven't quite figured that out yet ... and then out to the
street without being seen from the living room window. Or maybe I get out to
the street through the Zeidenbergs’ yard. Whatever, if I make it that far, then
I can just turn around as if I'm just coming back from visiting Anthony!"
Dipper waited for Mabel to agree to the logic of the plan. "So, c'mon, go get
my screwdriver set!" he whispered impatiently.
Mabel regarded Dipper blankly for several seconds. "Or," she suggested quietly,
"I make up a reason to get Mama and Daddy out into the back yard through the
patio doors, then you just walk out the front door and back in again."
Dipper was silent for several more seconds. "Or we could do that, yes," he
whispered in a deadpan tone.
===============================================================================
Mabel’s plan worked perfectly. It was easy for her to distract their parents
with her suggestions for the still-unfinished landscaping work in the backyard.
When they closed the sliding door behind them on their way out, Dipper
carefully sneaked out of Mabel’s room, through the house to the front entrance
and out, locking the door gingerly behind him. He waited a few moments before
re-entering normally, trying to act casual. Of course, Mabel and her creative
ideas could have kept their parents occupied for an hour, so Dipper’s
subterfuge was unnecessary.
Later in the evening, the adrenaline had stopped pumping, and Dipper signaled
that he and Mabel had to talk. This time they went to Dipper’s room. They both
had the same math class, so they spread out their algebra homework on his bed
to make it look like Dipper was assisting Mabel, in case either parent were to
come in.
“Wow, that was  close! ” Mabel said with quiet relief. “I’m just, like, all
‘Blargghh’! Kind of like some of our old adventures last summer, am I right? I
was  so scared!  I can’t believe we got away with that!”
Dipper didn’t say anything for several moments. Mabel peered at his face, and
couldn’t read his expression. He was just staring down in the direction of
their homework. “Dipper?” Mabel prompted gently.
“That’s just it, Mabel,” he said quietly. “That  was  close.  Too  close! I
actually can’t believe we got away with it either!”
“Dipper, we’ve  always  managed to get away with it! Think about it! Let’s see
… we’ve been shrunk, turned into wood, swapped bodies ...” Mabel paused to
shudder at that memory, “battled killer golf balls, defeated a time traveller …
heck, we’ve kicked a demon triangle guy out of  two  brains, including yours!
We’re still here, aren’t we? Seems we got away with all that!”
“We didn’t always get away with all that so smoothly, did we? How many times
did I come back to the Shack with a black eye, or worse? How many scrapes and
band-aids did you get? We got away with all that only because Grunkle Stan
chose to look the other way.” Dipper looked up to his sister’s face. “You know
he wasn’t stupid, Mabel! He knew that there was crazy stuff was going on! Don’t
forget, last month he saw right through …  us  … almost immediately.”
“But Daddy and Mama  haven’t , Dip! We’re doing a better job of keeping it
hidden than we were up north.” Mabel smirked confidently. “Time to face it,
Bro! We’re just  good! ”
“Or maybe we’ve just been  lucky .  Really  lucky!” Dipper replied, looking
back down, his voice softening. “... And luck has a way of running out.” He
paused, trying to find the right words to continue. Mabel was starting to be
uncomfortable with where this conversation was going.
“Mabel … one of these times, with some stupid little thing, we’re going to slip
up, something that will be noticed.” Dipper straightened, looking intently at
Mabel. “When that happens, what do you think Mom and Dad are going to do? To
us?” He waited, daring Mabel to try to put a positive spin on such a scenario.
She was unable to answer him.
"We’ve already talked about this,” Dipper continued. “You know they won’t stand
for it! They won’t let us continue to be together! They won’t even let us  live
together! One of us, maybe both, will be sent away to boarding schools!”
Mabel feebly tried to argue. “They love us, Dipper! They couldn’t do that to
us!”
“I know they love us, Mabel. In fact, that’s  exactly  why they  would
separate us! They would say it’s for our own good! And if anyone at church were
to find out the reason for it, they would  agree  with them!” Dipper paused
again, longer this time. His mouth trembled, and he struggled to draw another
breath. “We  can’t  let them do that to us, Mabel! We can’t let that happen! I
…” his voice broke, “...  I  can’t let that happen!” he finished wretchedly.
Mabel sensed where this was leading. Within her, she had built a shield of
denial to protect herself from this possibility. She had started constructing
it the night Grunkle Stan had revealed he knew about them. She built it
stronger when she arrived home in Piedmont. Now, she felt the shield starting
to crack.
No way, he is not going to tell me what I think he’s going to tell me!  she
thought to herself.  There is no way in heck that Dipper will say this!
But aloud, she couldn’t stop herself. “So … what are you saying?” she asked
shakily.
Dipper knew that it  had  to be said. He hated it, more than anything in the
world, but he saw no choice. The risks they faced were too great. He forced
himself to look Mabel directly into her eyes. It was one of the most difficult
things he had ever done.
“... I’m … saying we … we can’t do this anymore …” he managed haltingly.
Mabel's shield shattered into a million pieces.
No! No!  Mabel wailed in her head. Her face conveyed to Dipper her despair and
heartbreak.  It’s over? No, it can’t be over!  She was numbly aware of Dipper
taking her hands and holding them, neither having any words to say.
Grief quickly gave way to confusion for Mabel. She focused on Dipper’s
face.It’s over, Mabel thought to herself. Dipper just … just ended our
relationship together! He just broke up with me! Even though we need each
other. Even though we love each other! How … how could he do this? How could he
do this … tous? Tome?
Mabel’s eyes narrowed slightly, still focused on her brother.
Dipper saw the shift in her expression. “I  want  to be with you, Mabel. You
know that!” he told her softly.
Mabel said nothing, she just continued appraising her brother with growing
intensity. Her features seemed to grow hard, her face of confusion slowly
transforming into a glare. After a moment, she pulled her hands free and
silently started gathering up her homework papers off Dipper’s bed.
“Mabel, please … don’t be angry!” Dipper pleaded. He made a fist and presented
it to Mabel. She stopped, looked at it and then Dipper’s face for an instant.
Then her eyes flashed, and she forcefully picked up the last paper and her math
textbook.
No!!  Dipper thought despairingly.  No, I knew this would hurt her, but not
this much!  “Wait! Please, wait a second!” he implored.
With her schoolwork in her arms, Mabel quickly rose and strode to the door,
opening it with a yank.
Dipper didn’t care that the door was open. At that moment, his parents could
have been standing right there in the hallway, and it wouldn’t have mattered to
him. “I love you, Mabel!” he desperately called out.
She didn’t slow down in the slightest, crossing to her room and loudly slamming
her door.
From the far end of the house, their parents called out to see what was going
on, after hearing a door bang shut. They got no response, and found two closed
bedroom doors, with an uncommunicative teenager behind each one.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 7 *****
===============================================================================
“Please?” he pleaded, “Can't we just talk for a second?”
For several moments, there was still only silence, and no eye contact. Then
finally, came a black stare and a low voice that sounded almost like a growl.
“Get … the FUCK … out of my way!”
She was unrecognizable to him. He never imagined she was even capable of such a
cruel, ugly tone, or a look of such pure loathing. He actually stepped back
unwittingly from her and away from the door. She took the opportunity to
roughly elbow past him out into the hallway, then to the bathroom where she
quickly entered and locked herself in.
===============================================================================
Thursday
Getting ready for school was a tense affair in the Pines home. Following the
unexplained door slamming and silent sulking of the twins the previous night,
neither parent was successful in determining what had happened between Dipper
and Mabel. The twins weren’t willing to explain to their folks about whatever
it was, and it seemed they weren’t communicating to each other at all.
Their parents knew only that Dipper must have said or done something hurtful to
Mabel, because he was acting sad and remorseful, while Mabel was obviously hurt
and angry. They were disheartened to see Dipper be so down again. Doubly so
this week, since this time it apparently involved his sister, normally his best
friend, instead of some trouble at school. And as for Mabel, they were
concerned for her, and were unaccustomed to seeing her in anything less than a
chipper mood. They essentially had no idea how to cheer her up, since it
generally seemed she never required it.
Their father had to leave for work shortly after Dipper appeared in the
kitchen. Mabel came out soon after. Dipper half-heartedly tried to engage his
sister in conversation, but she wouldn’t acknowledge him: she acted as though
he wasn’t there at all. By the time her breakfast was eaten and her books were
ready, Mabel quickly gathered her things and walked out the door after saying a
curt goodbye to her mother, and pointedly ignoring her brother. Sandra was just
walking up the street, and Mabel led them toward school without waiting for
anyone to catch up.
Their mother watched Mabel walk away, then turned to a despondent Dipper, who
was slowly pulling on his backpack. She crossed her arms and confronted her
son. “What in the world happened last night?” she asked him directly. “I’ve
never  seen her so upset at you in my life!”
Dipper was so distraught over Mabel’s furious reaction to his decision the
previous night that they had to stop their romantic activities together, that
he had not been able to come up with any kind of cover story to tell his
mother.
“I don’t know, Mom. I … I can’t really tell you,” he said softly.
“That is  not  acceptable, young man!” she demanded. “Something serious
happened last night between the two of you, and you will tell me what it was!”
Dipper stood before her, immobile, blankly looking at the door that Mabel had
just used to leave the house. His mother raised her voice. “Right now!”
Dipper looked at his mother for an instant, then avoided her eyes. His lips
moved, but nothing came out. Finally, he said, “I’m sorry, Mom … but … I can’t.
You have to trust me … that if I tell you ... it'll just make everything
worse,” he mumbled. His mother gaped at his cryptic non-answer. Dipper rubbed
his hand roughly through his hair. “Can I just go to school now, Mom? I’m gonna
be late.”
She was unprepared to deal with Dipper blatantly disregarding her direct
question, and even more unprepared for how earnest he was while doing so.
Mutely, she nodded her head. Taking his cap from its hook and pulling it low
over his forehead, Dipper headed out the door with a quiet “Bye.”
===============================================================================
It only took a fraction of a second for Mabel’s bad mood to be spotted, before
she even reached the end of her driveway. Sandra thought Mabel must have a case
of the morning grumpy-grumps.
“Hey, girlfriend! What’s up?” she asked in an upbeat tone, trying to quickly
coax a smile out of Mabel. The scowl continued, though, as Mabel reached the
sidewalk, and Sandra grew concerned. “O … kay … what’s wrong?”
What’s wrong?  thought Mabel to herself.  What’s WRONG?? Try every-bleepity-
bloopity-mother-.... frickin’ -thing! I hate everything! I hate my clothes. I
hate my room. I hate my parents. I hate school. Yeah, girlfriend, I even hate
you and every last blond hair on your head! But all those things, I can at
least tolerate. And I’ll need them all if I ever get over feeling like this.
But there is  one  thing I hate, that I can hate without reservation!
“Dipper!” she growled, gesturing Sandra to start walking and not wait for her
brother. “He’s the biggest buttface … no, the biggest  asshole  … ever!”
“What?” Sandra was shocked by Mabel’s demeanor and language, and specifically
the news that her brother, her BFF, was the cause of her anger. “Oh my god!
What did he do?”
Mabel marched in silence, now realizing too late that she couldn’t actually
tell Sandra, or anybody else for that matter,  why  she was so angry at
everything, or at Dipper in particular.  What am I gonna say? That my brother
broke up with me? Um, no!  So she clammed up, hoping Sandra would just drop the
subject.
“Mabel? What happened with you and Dipper?” Sandra prodded as she tried to keep
pace with Mabel’s powerwalk.
“It’s nothing!” Mabel snapped. “Just forget about it! I don’t want to talk
about it!”
Sandra nervously fell into step beside Mabel, and held her tongue against the
questions and concerns she had for her friend. She tried to get Mabel
interested in talking about what part she’d like to be assigned to play in the
school musical, as the final casting would be posted the next day on Friday.
But it was not happening: Mabel was being a Grade “A” grouch. The girls walked
in uncomfortable silence to the next corner, where Anthony was just arriving to
join them.
As he and Sandra started to resume their discussion from the previous day,
Mabel huffed in irritation and sped up her walk to school.
===============================================================================
Dipper and Ezra sat at a table in the cafeteria during lunch hour, already
halfway through eating, when Ezra noticed Anthony’s tall frame weaving through
the tables towards them. They hadn’t had a chance to talk as a group together
all morning.
Ezra was immediately thankful for Anthony’s arrival, as Dipper had been a less
than adequate conversationalist thus far. He hadn’t been able to figure out
what caused this week’s new sour mood in his friend any better than last week’s
episode.
With their "nerd club" together, Ezra immediately steered the discussion
towards their idea for organizing a group for role-playing games. “We should
get together right after school today, try to figure out who to ask to reserve
a room, and what time, and …”
“Uhh …” Anthony interrupted. “After school today’s no good, sorry. I’m … kinda
busy.”
Dipper and Ezra looked at Anthony strangely. He  never  did anything after
school but go home and play video games. Ezra pushed him. “So … what’s up?”
Anthony managed to look embarrassed and cocky at the same time, the color of
his cocoa skin deepening even more on his cheeks. “Umm … you guys know Sandra,
right?” The other boys nodded with raised eyebrows. “Well … we were talking
yesterday on the way home and then on the phone last night, and again this
morning on the way to school, and …”
“Wait wait, what? Just a minute, back up!” Ezra interrupted him. Dipper had
seen Anthony and Sandra talking on the way home from school the day before, but
was only marginally less surprised. “You and Sandra … you’re …” He motioned
with pudgy fingers to get Anthony to finish his sentence.
“We’re not anything! … At least, not yet,” he finished a bit shyly. “Anyways,
she’s talked me into …” he looked around self-consciously before continuing
rapidly, “... auditioning after classes today for one of the guys’ parts in the
school musical.”
Ezra snorted loudly in amusement, and Dipper forgot about being in a funk at
this news. “Dude,  you  want to be in ‘Hairspray’?” Dipper said incredulously.
“You know there’s  singing  involved, right? And  dancing ?”
“Hey, it  might  be fun,” he replied defensively. “Maybe you guys should try
out, too … you know, give a guy some moral support, huh?”
Ezra blew air through his lips. “Ah, yeah no!” he said emphatically. “Man, I am
so  not on board with you on this!”
“Who knows, Ezzy, it might help you to meet a girl, too!” prompting another
snort from Ezra. Anthony turned to Dipper. “What do  you  say, Dip? If you
auditioned, I’d like to try to measure the frequency of the squeal from Mabel!
You’d blow her mind!”
Dipper’s face fell slightly. Glancing down quickly, he replied, “Nah, I don’t
think so. Sorry, man.”
Ezra watched Dipper closely, then turned to look at the table where Mabel sat
in the cafeteria. He noticed that Dipper’s sister was sitting on the opposite
side of the table than usual, now facing away from her brother.
===============================================================================
Wide-eyed and open-mouthed, he stood frozen to the spot, immobile beside her
bedroom door. His hands were shaking. Unpleasant tingling sensations were
shooting through his torso, and down the lengths of his arms and legs. A
burning ache was lodged deep inside his chest, with an intensity like nothing
he could have imagined before.
Several seconds passed, and finally his nervous system ordered his lungs to
involuntarily take a painfully deep breath. The sudden gasp spurred him. He had
told himself that he was going to use this time to get her to talk to him, to
listen to him. Surely, this was part of the plan, wasn't it?  He had to try
again!
===============================================================================
Friday
Mabel's mood had not improved with the start of another new day.
Ugh, look at all this crap!  she thought to herself as she pushed through her
clothes.  Couldn't I have knit any sweaters that aren't so frickin'  cute ? I
don't want cute!
She slammed her dresser drawer closed. Every one of her sweaters reminded her
of whatever happy and silly inspiration had taken hold of her when she had knit
each one. Memories that were certainly not conducive to maintaining a miserable
demeanor, which was exactly the kind of demeanor she wanted to maintain. She
seized her bra and strapped it on, pulled over her plainest long-sleeved t-
shirt, and grabbed her backpack to face certain inquisition from her family in
the kitchen for breakfast.
Dipper was already at the table eating from a cereal bowl, and looked up meekly
as she entered. Her mother watched her with concern as she briskly headed for
the cupboard. Silence filled the room as Mabel retrieved a bowl and spoon,
cereal box, and milk, then roughly sat down at the opposite end of the table
from her brother.
“Pumpkin, don’t you think it’s time for you to tell me what’s bothering you?”
her mother asked gently.
Oh, of course!  she said to herself.  Telling that story will be  great  for
the old family dynamics! “Okay Mama! Here’s what’s bothering me! Me and Sir
Dipshit over there figured out we were in love with each other a few weeks ago
on our birthday, and we’d been bumpin' uglies just as often as we could ever
since! But he broke up with me because he’s all scared you and Daddy would
royally freak if you found out, and then you’d split up our family! But, hey!
We’re all good now, right?!?” Yeah, mother dear,that’ll go over  real  well!
Aloud, she primly said, “There’s nothing wrong, Mama, just like I told you last
night,” staring at her bowl as she poured the milk. “Everything’s hunky-dory!
Couldn’t be better!” She set the milk down with enough force to cause some to
splash out onto the table. “Fan … Tastic!” Then she started eating, practically
daring her mother to call her out on her bitchy behavior.
Dipper didn’t give his mother a chance to respond. “Mabel, I’m sorry!" he
pleaded. "I get you’re mad, but don’t take it out on Mom. She didn’t do
anything!”
Mabel kept eating while staring menacingly at her bowl.  Wow! Just wow!
Dipper’s defending Mama and Daddy, taking their side! He  never  takes my side!
The irrationality of her thoughts didn’t occur to her: she simply grasped onto
whatever she could to internally justify her adolescent fury.  He’s got hella
nerve, poking his head in my door last night. Still trying to tell me he loves
me! Yeah, right, Brocifer. Puke-a-rama!
Meanwhile, their mother was speaking. “Alright then, Mabel, if you’re not
interested in talking …” and she turned her attention to her son. “Dipper, what
are you apologizing to her for? What exactly happened the other night?”
Dipper’s complexion paled to a sickly shade, and he couldn’t look up to meet
his mother’s gaze. “Well?” she prompted impatiently, leaning over him. Dipper
didn’t move, joining Mabel in providing only silence. She raised her voice in
exasperation, turning back toward Mabel. “Would one of you  please  tell me
what’s going  on  here?”
In Mabel’s mind, all of this was Dipper’s fault.  There’s no way I’m sitting
here and getting yelled at for any of this! HE broke up with me, let HIM handle
this!  Coldly, Mabel dropped her spoon into her nearly-full bowl, roughly
picked up her backpack and lunch, and stalked straight out of the house without
saying another word, paying no attention to her mother’s increasingly
frustrated demands that she remain where she was. With no sign of Sandra on the
street, she trudged towards school under her own personal black cloud.
Dipper could see Mabel stomp up the street through the front window. He was
overwhelmed by a sick feeling in his gut; a combination of stress, lack of
sleep, and heartache, which was made all the worse as his mother started
questioning him again. Her anger was increasing rapidly over her inability to
get her children to talk to her.
His stomach suddenly lurched, and he tasted his mouth starting to water
rapidly. Recognizing the signs of urgent nausea, Dipper leapt to his feet and
rushed to the bathroom. He just managed to lock the door behind him and reach
the toilet before he violently threw up his breakfast.
After the third wave of vomit finished and his stomach had nothing left to
expel, Dipper sat back on the floor, panting and exhausted. He was vaguely
aware of his mother’s calls through the bathroom door, now sounding much more
concerned than angry.
When he emerged from the bathroom, Dipper felt like death warmed over.
Apparently he didn't look any better, as his mother now advised he should stay
home from school, a suggestion he accepted without hesitation. Dipper dragged
himself to his room and collapsed into his bed, turning over to stare at the
wall in blank dejection.
===============================================================================
By lunch hour, Mabel still had seen no sign of Dipper. Not that she'd admit to
herself that she was looking for him, of course.
She bristled as she recalled how she'd snapped at Dipper's friend Ezra between
periods in the morning. He'd approached her and asked her if everything was
okay, and she accused Ezra of being sent by Dipper to talk to her. It had been
her brother's stout friend who had informed her (in a now somewhat less
friendly manner) that Dipper had not come to classes at all that morning, and
shouldn’t his sister have known that?
Mabel exhaled heavily as she approached the table in the cafeteria that she and
her friends sat at, forcing herself to try to be more like her old persona.
Yeah, I'm pissed about Dipper,  she groused to herself,  but I suppose school's
not so bad, especially since Dipper's not here! This isn't like my family: my
friends have no reason to forgive me in the future, so I’d better be a little
nicer to them.
All her friends were already at their table, where Aisha's tight dreadlocks
were at the centre of a bubble of excitement. Their heads were together as
Mabel approached and sat down. She was immediately aware that all conversation
stopped, and although everyone knew she had sat down, no one was looking at
her. Jordan was fidgeting nervously, while Juanita looked down blankly.
"Ha ha! Hello?" she said with an obviously plastic smile, followed by a long
pause as she received only a couple of subdued replies. She bravely tried to
keep a grin on her face. "What the hey-hey, girls? What's goin' on?"
The other girls looked at each other nervously, and Sandra reluctantly turned
to Mabel. "Uh ... so I guess you didn't see the posting in front of the
auditorium for the Drama Club ... huh?" she finished softly.
Mabel's heart sank, as she immediately determined what the posting was. The
casting was complete for the production of "Hairspray".  And I didn't get any
of the major parts. For the Drama Club! I’m the  definition  of drama: how
could they not cast me for a good role!
Though her posture had slumped and her face had fallen, she tried to twist one
side of her mouth up and look up to her friends. "Ah well, it'll still be fun,
whatever any of us are asked to do in the show, right? Of course I’m not gonna
be right for the part of Tracy, I’m not  nearly  fat enough! I mean, the school
play is still a super-big production, and ..." She stopped as she saw Sandra's
expression became stricken.
"Mabel, I'm so sorry ... it looks like you didn't get cast ... for  any  role."
Mabel looked disbelievingly back to her friend. Nothing? There was  nothing
for her in the production?
Jordan spoke up apologetically. "There was a big note at the bottom, thanking
everyone who auditioned, but the play calls for a lot of 'racial diversity',
and a lot of roles for boys. The vast majority of students who tried out were
Caucasian girls, so there just wasn't enough parts for everyone, even for
ensemble roles." Mabel absorbed this as her other friends quietly offered
apologies as well.
What Mabel  didn't  hear from any of her friends was any comforting statements
of solidarity, about how any of them knew exactly how she felt. And with a sick
feeling, she knew why no such statements were coming.
"But all four of you ... you  all  got cast ... you’re  all  in the play,
aren’t you?" she asked quietly, unable to mask the bitterness in her voice.
Mabel barely heard them as they reluctantly confirmed her suspicion.
Great,  thought Mabel.  I feel so much better now!
===============================================================================
He forced himself to the bathroom door and knocked loudly. “C’mon!” he called
out, silently begging his voice not to falter. "Please … you gotta talk to me!”
He paused for moment, hoping that she might respond. “I know this sucks,
because it sucks just as much for me as it does for you! You think I'm not
hurting, too?"
He received only silence for a reply.
===============================================================================
Saturday
The twins' parents still had no explanation for the issues between their
children, as the one-sided hostilities entered its third day. They had been
trying to get to the bottom of the problem, but Dipper and Mabel remained
stubbornly silent, neither one willing to open up on the cause of the tension.
Mabel only grew more angry when her father had suggested the night before that
she should speak to her brother, and Dipper at least was not physically ill as
long his mother was not interrogating him on what happened Wednesday evening.
Their kids were unhappy, which by itself concerned their parents, but they had
to admit that they had no evidence to believe that there was anything truly
serious to worry about behind the squabble. They both remembered their own
teenage years, and how emotional things could be at that age. Little things can
blow up easily, and seem extremely important to an adolescent mind.
And truth be told, maybe now this really wasn't such unusual behavior for
Dipper and Mabel. After two-and-a-half months away from home, they had to
accept that perhaps their children just weren't as good pals to each other that
they had been in the spring. They'd had to deal with each other all summer
long, and the kids had mentioned that their 2nd summer in Oregon hadn't been
nearly as fun as the one previous. Perhaps the twins had been at each other's
throats off and on for awhile now, and by trying to force them to work things
out, maybe they'd only been making things worse? Dipper had said as much on
Thursday.
So the decision was made that they would hold off on forcing the issue, at
least for one more day. Instead, the twins were to be put to work. The "men" of
the house resumed the landscaping project in the backyard, while their mother
and Mabel started in on cleaning out the basement.
The weather was cooler for outside work than it was the previous weekend, and
that was a good thing for Dipper because his father demanded more from him this
time. In order to complete the job before a low-pressure front moved in the
next day (probably bringing rain), they had a lot of hard, physical work to
complete. They needed to complete construction of a retaining wall, and then
roll out new sod that had just been delivered. Once again, Dipper worked
diligently, though any enthusiasm was notably absent.
Inside the house, Mabel's quiet fuming did not let up. While she was more
obedient about following her mother's instructions than the previous morning (a
severe warning from her father had taken care of that), nothing was going to
make her  like  the chores, or force her to pretend that she did. Mabel could
not keep herself from getting snippy, which only caused her mother to start
snappng back at her.
While the family was eating a tense lunch, the parents briefly left for their
bedroom to talk privately about their children's behavior that morning. With
just the twins at the table, no words were spoken. Dipper felt Mabel's anger,
but still kept glancing up to peer in her direction, hoping for a softening of
her demeanor. He managed to catch her eye once, but her expression left him
with no doubt that her attitude toward him hadn't softened at all. Dipper
elected to keep his words to himself.
Mabel stewed in bottled-up fury. Her pressure-cooker mood threatened to explode
at any time, but she kept it contained. If she was honest with herself, she
would have been forced to admit that she didn't know what Dipper could do or
say that would make things better. Even if he took it all back, so that their
secret affair could continue despite the risk, she knew it would not reverse
her anger. Part of her was simply itching to just lash out, but she had no
justification since Dipper wasn't doing anything to provoke her.
The silence was unbearable for both of the twins.
===============================================================================
The work was finally completed in early evening. Mabel and her mother finished
hauling the last of the boxes of stuff to give away to charity from the
basement, Dipper put away tools in the garage, and his father started the
sprinkler to soak the new grass.
The sun had gone down, and everyone was hungry. All were physically exhausted
and emotionally on edge, and no one was really in the mood to prepare dinner.
So after everyone had cleaned up, the twins agreed to their mother's suggestion
that they order pizza.
More uncomfortable silence fell between Dipper and Mabel as they sat in the
living room waiting for the delivery of the food. Their parents' attempts to
spark any kind of conversation fizzled awkwardly. Unable to deal with it any
longer, Dipper timidly rose and headed for his room, telling his folks he'd be
out when he heard the door.
Dipper's spirits had never been lower. He felt nothing but despair, as his
aching joints and muscles joined forces with his aching heart in making him
miserable.  How is this supposed to ever get better?  he thought dejectedly.
As he slowly made his way to his room, the small table at the end of the hall
caught his eye. On it sat the family's large leather-bound edition of the Holy
Bible. Dipper stared at the book for a long moment, then entered his room and
flopped onto his bed in resignation.
===============================================================================
“You can’t do this forever!" he called through the bathroom door. "We have to
work this out, this is our only chance to talk about it.” He paused, praying
for a response. “I love you, and …”
“I have NOTHING more to say to you!” she suddenly screamed back through the
door. “You keep trying to tell me you LOVE me? Yeah! And how did you show that?
By fucking BREAKING UP with me! Go to HELL!!”
He felt pain unlike any before, as if her hand was gripping and tearing cruelly
at his heart, yanking on it mercilessly.
===============================================================================
Sunday
It went without saying that Mabel was in no mood to attend worship service at
church with their parents. Her mother had poked her head into her bedroom, and
had verified that the teenager was, in fact, in just as miserable a mood as she
had been the previous few days.
The twins’ father quietly went to have a private discussion with Dipper. He
entered his son’s room, and after closing the door behind him, he pulled the
desk chair over and lowered himself down, next to where Dipper sat forlornly on
the side of his bed. They sat in silence for moment, Dipper intently examining
the carpet pattern on the floor between his feet.
“Son, I don’t like it that you … well,  neither  of you ... are telling us what
happened that night, but it certainly looks to me like you have some fences to
mend with your sister.” Dipper wouldn’t look up to meet his gaze, but gave a
small nod.
“Alright.” He paused, sadly regarding the teen. “Look, I know you, Dip, and I
know how much you care about Mabel.” He didn't notice Dipper’s back tense
involuntarily. “Whatever happened, I know you didn’t mean to hurt her. Somehow
… you’ve just got to make her understand that, right?” He clapped his hand onto
Dipper’s shoulder. “Your mother and I will go to church by ourselves this
morning. If what the two of you need is some time to hash this out without us
old fogeys around, then we’ll give it to you.” Dipper felt the grip on his
shoulder tighten. “But I’m  not  putting up with this anymore after we come
back. If this isn’t any better after this afternoon, we  will  be getting this
… whatever  this  is ... out into the open, as a family! We are not letting
another day go by without  dealing  with this. You understand?”
“Yeah ... okay,” Dipper replied quietly, still unable to look at his father
directly. His father gave him an affectionate little shake, then released his
grip and rose from the chair, turning to leave Dipper’s room and reaching for
the door knob.
“Dad?” Dipper said tentatively. His father stopped and turned, as Dipper
finally looked up. A long moment passed, as he anxiously rubbed his neck before
continuing. "When you’re at church, could you and Mom ... " he paused, clearing
his throat and took a deep breath. "Could you ... pr- … pray ... for us,
please?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
Dipper's father looked at his son, raising an eyebrow at the request. Dipper
had never asked for prayer before. He was pleased that faith had some meaning
in Dipper's life, but concerned over the fact that this situation had become
such a crisis in the teen's mind. He worried over what it was that could
possibly have happened between his children that was so serious, that this was
the event that had led his self-reliant son to turn to faith as a lifeline.
After briefly thinking about insisting that entire family go to church after
all, instead he nodded. "Absolutely, Dip. We will.” He paused before
continuing. “You know, God's got a plan for all of us, we just ... we just have
to surrender, and let Him take control, as hard as that is to do sometimes," he
said gently, then adding, "Well, we'll see you when we get back, okay?"
Dipper returned the nod. "Thanks, Dad," he said in a small voice.
===============================================================================
Minutes later, the twins were alone in the house, their parents having driven
off to their Sunday morning service. Mabel remained obstinately in her room,
while Dipper sat on his bed, staring through his open door at the closed door
across the hall.
He let out a soft, ironic chuckle. Just four days ago, as he and his sister had
looked forward to having the house to themselves, how different had things
been? How different were things since three weeks ago, since their birthday
weekend in Portland?
Has it really only been three weeks?  he thought to himself, shaking his head.
How many times can our lives turn upside down in three weeks? We're just
fourteen-year-old kids! Can the two of us really be expected to deal with this
all on our own? What the hell have we been doing? How could we ever think we
could stay in control of this?
Control. All of this was completely out of control! Dipper thought about what
he'd been taught at Sunday School, and what his father had just told him:
giving up control. Just let it all go, and let God do His will. He had never
thought about being remotely capable of ever doing that. Dipper always wanted
to be in control of every last thing, every moment of every day.
If God were in control, what would He do about he and Mabel’s relationship
together? Was there any future for them together, given that they were siblings
and had fallen in love? Did he want to give away control of their future? Could
he just submit like that, and would it help? Did he even know  how  to let it
go?
He didn't know the answers to any of these questions. But he knew he had to do
something differently. He was desperate, and he couldn't keep going this way.
He bowed his head, and for the first time in his life, said a genuine,
heartfelt prayer.
Then he took a deep breath, wiped the moisture from his eyes, and stood to see
what God had in His plan for his relationship with Mabel.
===============================================================================
Still in her nightgown, Mabel was sprawled out on top of her bed. She’d been
awake for hours, but she was unable to focus on anything. She had tried writing
in her oft-ignored diary, browsing through her sticker collection, and had even
started knitting a plain dark-grey sweater. But nothing brought her solace.
Nothing made her feel … better? No, she didn’t  want  to feel better! She
didn’t know  what  she wanted!
What Mabel  did  know was that she just wanted to be left alone.  Really,  she
thought,  is that so much to ask? Can't a girl just be angry? Why can't
everyone just leave me be?
First Mom asking if I wanted to go to church. They say they’ll go without me:
fine by me! But then they tell me they left Dipper here alone with me! What the
fricking heck? Why would any member of my family, particularly Dipper, think I
would want to be left alone with him?
She was just finishing this thought when she heard a soft knock on her door.
"Mabel?" came Dipper's voice. "Can we please talk about this?"
Mabel rolled her eyes, and turned over on her side away from the door,
squinting at her old Sev’ral Timez poster on the wall. She heard Dipper knock
and call out twice more. Then her eyes popped open, blazing, as she heard her
door being opened behind her.  He did NOT just walk into my room uninvited!
“C’mon Mabes,” Dipper said softly from the threshold of her doorway. “Can’t we
try to get past this? Can you give me a chance to explain better?”
The pain of grief Mabel felt flooded through her. She willed herself to keep it
bottled up, but she knew the rage would burst from her if she didn’t get away
from Dipper. She quickly rose to her feet and advanced to the doorway, staring
at the floor. She stopped when Dipper did not move.
“Please, can’t we just talk for a second?” Dipper pleaded.
Buddy,  thought Mabel,  talking is the  last  thing you want to do with me
right now!
“Get … the FUCK … out of my way!” she growled back.
===============================================================================
Outside the bathroom door, Dipper rallied the last of his strength. “... Mabel
… I’m not leaving this spot until you come out … please, Mabel … you justhaveto
come out and talk to me ... or else ..."
“Or else WHAT?” Mabel shouted back viciously through the door. “What are you
gonna do if I don’t come out and talk to you? Huh? You’ll break in here and
RAPE me again?! FUCK you!!” she screamed. “Just … FUCK YOU!!”
Dipper’s heart was ripped completely from his chest. Mabel couldn’t have landed
a more brutal, devastating blow if she tried.
Her furious verbal assault continued to stream unabated from within the
bathroom. Any faith Dipper felt completely left him. He was utterly defeated,
dead and empty, with only overwhelming pain left to let him know he was, in
fact, still alive. He wished he could just stop breathing. He wished Mabel
could have finished the job and actually killed him. He wished he had the
courage to kill himself.
As he listened to her sporadic invectives continue to be shouted from behind
the locked door, he shuffled his way down the hall and past the living room,
then out the front door. He didn’t know where he was going to go, or why, or
for how long. Nothing mattered anymore. Nothing mattered.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 8 *****
===============================================================================
“And you have no idea where he went?”
Mabel hugged her knees on the living room couch, trying to contain her
seemingly unending supply of tears. “No, Daddy,” she sniffed.
“Well, how long ago did he leave?” her father continued, with growing
insistence.
“I don’t know,” she replied miserably. And it was the truth. Mabel had no clue
when Dipper had left the house, or where he had gone.
She had stayed locked in the bathroom for at least two hours after screaming at
her brother through the door, crying out her frustration and anger. It kept
spilling out, wave after wave. She cursed him for breaking her heart, then
cursed her parents for forcing him to do what he did to her. Finally she cursed
life and God that she had been allowed to fall for Dipper at all, for the
unfairness and cruelty that she was forced to experience this hell. She let all
her pent up emotions out, until there was none left.
With the pressure released, she sat on the floor and leaned up against the side
of the bathtub. She regretfully thought about everything that had happened
since she and Dipper were nearly caught by their parents on Wednesday evening,
and Dipper’s subsequent determination to end their romantic relations. She’d
been so furious, so full of rage, she barely recognized herself as she recalled
how she’d acted for the past several days. Towards her parents, towards her
friends. And particularly towards Dipper.
Mabel realized that there was one thing that was undeniable: she still loved
Dipper, completely and desperately. And she had to admit to herself that
Dipper’s decision was probably the safest thing for them to do. It just hurt so
much to have to face that fact! And if that was true for her, and if she
accepted that Dipper did in fact love her in return, then this must have been
just as hard for him! And then on top of that, she’d heaped several days worth
of passive-aggressive abuse on him, and finally those awful vindictive
accusations earlier that morning. She couldn’t imagine how he must have been
feeling.
When she was finally ready to come out, ready to face Dipper and apologize for
her behavior, ready to beg for forgiveness, she found the house empty. When she
called his cell phone, she heard it ring from in his room: he had left without
taking it. As she picked it up, she also found his wallet and house key beside
it on his dresser.
Mabel had taken all three items to the living room and put them on the coffee
table in front of her, trying to figure out where Dipper had gone, and what it
meant that he had left without saying anything to her or taking any
necessities. The realization that she could not let him know how sorry she was,
was just hitting her when her parents arrived home from church and found her
huddled on the couch.
Her father continued his questioning of his distraught daughter. “Dipper
wouldn’t just do this! Just  leave  without his keys or wallet? Let alone the
phone! What on earth is going  on  here?” Mabel drew a ragged breath, and began
sobbing quietly. “What  is  this issue you two are fighting over?”
Mabel’s composure fell apart, and her cries became loud and uncontrolled. Her
mother wrapped her arms around her, and admonished her father. “Baby, we can’t
force this conversation on her  now ! We have to find Dipper, and we need her!”
She turned to Mabel, shushing her until she had calmed down. “Is there anything
at all that you can tell us, anything that he said or anything you saw, that
might tell us where he’s gone?”
She just shook her head slowly. “No. He didn’t say anything,” she whimpered.
“And I didn’t see or hear him go. He could have left fifteen minutes ago … or
two hours ago.” Her breath caught. “I … I don’t know!” she finished pitifully.
Her father pursed his lips in frustration, then sighed. “All right. Mabel,
you’ll stay here in case he comes back. Phone the neighbors, see if any of them
saw which way he went. And phone all his friends, see if he went to any of
their houses.” He looked at his wife. “Honey, you and I will just have to take
our cars and start driving around. I’ll go east, you go west. Stop at the
libraries, the mall, the parks, stores he likes, wherever. We all keep in
touch, and if he doesn’t turn up by nightfall, we call the police. Okay?” He
turned and went out the door quickly, headed for his car.
Mabel’s mother paused briefly to kiss Mabel on the head. “He’ll be back here
soon, Pumpkin,” she whispered. “Try not to worry. I love you.”
“Love you, too, Mama,” Mabel whispered back. Then her mother was out the door
as well, leaving Mabel alone, sick with worry and overwhelmed with guilt.
Shakily, she picked up the phone to start making her calls.
===============================================================================
Dipper shifted his position on the park bench seat, as the circulation to his
legs had been lost and his feet were going numb. Not as numb as he felt inside
his chest, but at least he felt he could do something about his legs.
He shivered involuntarily. The wind off the water was getting chilly, and he
was wearing only jeans and a t-shirt. He stared out, idly watching the latest
passenger jet lining up to land at Oakland International, squinting away from
the sun that was falling close to the skyline of downtown San Francisco, across
the Bay. As the noise of the jet faded, the sounds of sloshing waves and
calling birds once again came to the fore.
Dipper hadn’t known where he was going when he left his house hours before. He
just needed to leave, away from his sister who hated him.
On automatic pilot, he had walked south out of the suburban city of Piedmont
into Oakland, uncaring of destination, unaware of surroundings other than
traffic lights, not wanting to stop anywhere. Nearly four hours later, the
muscles in his legs had demanded he look for a place to rest. He found that he
was in an industrial area, near a sign pointing to the Oyster Bay Regional
Shoreline. Following the path on the edge of the former landfill site on San
Francisco Bay, he had located one of the few benches in the park and wearily
sat down. It had been the perfect place to sulk and wallow in dark
contemplation. Few people were out in the park that afternoon to disturb him.
Why did I get my hopes up, thinking that God had the answers?  he thought
dismally.  He didn’t help. If anything, He made it worse! I kept pushing Mabel,
thinking it was the right thing to do, pushing for her to respond to me. Shit,
did she ever respond!
He passed more time, kicking gravel beneath his shoes, recounting in his head
for seemingly the thousandth time the cruel words Mabel had spat from behind
the bathroom door. She hated him! She  despised  him! She told him he  raped
her! He never thought he would ever feel such emotions from Mabel. He felt
attacked, beaten down, and tortured. It hurt so much that Mabel no longer loved
him. Yes, she’d been hurt by his decision to break off the sexual side of their
relationship, but they had no choice! He did it  because  he loved her! He
still did! But she hated him. It wasn’t fair!
This was no longer the same kind of self-loathing pain he felt the week
previous, he realized.  This time, I didn’t do anything to deserve this!  he
thought to himself.  I made a hard choice, and was only trying to protect our
lives together, so that Mabel and I can remain together. So Mom and Dad can’t
separate us. And what did she do? She pushed me away, as hard as she could! Why
can’t she ever be grateful? Why is it always me suffering? Why do I  always
sacrifice everything for her?
Dipper allowed the resentment to fester. He’d never harbored ill will towards
his sister before. Sure, they’d bickered over lots of things, like all siblings
do, but she had never done anything that  really hurt  like this before.
Thoughts of desire and memories of their lovemaking together were pushed to the
back of his mind. Feeling bitterness toward Mabel was unfamiliar and
uncomfortable, but as the late afternoon went on, he slowly embraced it.
The chill in his bones deepened as another gust of cool wind blew in off the
water. Dipper cursed himself.  Real smart, genius,  he thought,  staying out
all day, no phone or money, no jacket.  He sighed heavily.  I wish I could stay
out here alone. But I’m hungry and cold, and I suppose Mom and Dad might be
worried about where I am, even if Mabel isn’t!
Rising from the bench and thrusting his hands into his jeans pockets, Dipper
grudgingly started the long walk back home as the sun slipped beneath the
western horizon.
===============================================================================
The call was made to the police when Dipper had not come home in the evening.
When the officers arrived, Mabel tearfully gave them a description of the
clothes he had been wearing, while her mother provided a photo and told them of
the unique birthmark on his forehead. The family was assured that when the boy
was located, they would be notified.
The lights in the Pines home were still on at two in the morning. Mr. Pines was
still out, driving around looking for Dipper, while Mabel and her mother were
at home waiting by the phone, when the police called. An unidentified boy
fitting Dipper’s description had been brought to the Highland Hospital by
ambulance. He was unconscious with severe injuries, and was in serious
condition.
They called Dipper’s father, and he arrived at the emergency department first.
He confirmed that it was his son, as he watched the staff work on him in the
ER. He barely recognized Dipper from all the bandages, swelling, and wires and
hoses that were attached to him. The teen was being prepped for surgery, and
his father was quickly whisked away.
When Mabel and her mother got there, the police told the family what they knew.
Dipper had been found in an alley in the neighborhood of Fruitvale, a rough
urban area of Oakland south of Piedmont. He had been beaten severely. There
were no knife wounds: his attacker or attackers had used punches and kicks
only, but that was small consolation. An ER doctor told them that he had at
least three broken ribs, a broken collarbone, a partial leg fracture, four lost
molars, and a broken jaw and cheekbone. And that was just what they could see:
he had a probable concussion, and was in emergency surgery in order to locate
the source of internal bleeding.
Like her parents, Mabel was forced to simply do nothing but wait. She felt
responsible for Dipper’s injuries, knowing that if she hadn’t been so hard on
him, he wouldn’t have been out in the city on his own. Guilt weighed her down,
but she also felt determination to make things better.
There’s got to some way to fix things up, to get back what we’ve lost,  she
thought to herself in the waiting room.  If only I’d done things differently!
He needs to pull through this! If … no,  when  … he gets better, there’s going
to be nothing that will stop me from showing him I love him. He’ll have to
forgive me! I’ll do whatever it takes! To heck with Mama and Daddy! He belongs
with me, we love each other! Somehow, I can make this work!
===============================================================================
Throughout the next day, Mabel kept vigil by Dipper’s bed in the critical care
unit. While her parents took turns, Mabel stubbornly refused to leave her
twin’s side.
Dipper finally regained consciousness the following evening. He was on a strong
dose of pain-killing drugs in his IV. His neck was braced and his head
cushioned to keep him immobile, and his jaw was wired shut until he was ready
to endure more surgery for his face. He couldn’t speak. As his eyes fluttered
open, he groaned, then his eyes darted around in wide-eyed fear until he saw
his mother and father move to stand together on the left side of his bed. His
worried mother lightly gripped her son’s hand.
“It’s all right, Dipper. You’re in the hospital, but you’re safe now.” Dipper’s
eyes relaxed a bit, and he weakly squeezed his mother’s hand, and she and his
father both gave him warm smiles.
Mabel leaned over into Dipper’s line of sight from the other side of the bed.
“Dip! Hey, Broseph!” she cried shakily. “I’m here too! I’m not going anywhere,
either!” She took Dipper’s other hand.
Dipper locked eyes with his sister for a second, then redirected his gaze to
the ceiling. His right hand remained limp. Then his eyes lost focus and slowly
closed, and he fell back into morphine-induced sleep.
===============================================================================
Two days and facial reconstructive surgery later, Dipper was eventually able to
communicate to his family what had happened, mumbling through the new pins and
plates in his mouth and cheek.
He recounted how it was evening and completely dark as Dipper was making his
way back from the shoreline park towards Piedmont. Initially reluctant, but
then eager to get home, the most direct route involved walking through areas of
Oakland he realized were a lot more dangerous at night than they were in
daylight earlier that day.
He almost made it, and was about an hour’s walk from home when he started being
followed by a group of three older boys. He tried to ignore them, but as he
approached a narrow side street they suddenly ran to grab him, and dragged him
off into the dark alley.
The thugs taunted the skinny, clean-cut suburban kid who wandered into their
turf, and demanded everything he had. When he’d desperately explained he had
nothing on him at all, they became furious. Two of them held him against a wall
by his arms, while the third viciously beat him. He recalled being punched in
the face over and over, and being dumped to the ground. Then the kicking
started. The last thing he remembered was the unbelievable pain caused a direct
kick to his kidney.
His father asked him why he left the house and walked so far in the first
place. Mabel shifted uncomfortably in her chair, and Dipper paused before
saying that he and Mabel tried working out their disagreement, but he got
frustrated and had to walk away. Mabel pleaded to her parents to let Dipper
rest, and besides, she assured them that she wasn’t mad anymore, and she
promised never to let things get that ugly again. Dipper gave a slight nod in
agreement, and their father reluctantly allowed the subject to drop until their
lives could return to normal.
When neither of their folks were watching, Mabel threw a big, exaggerated wink
at Dipper, along with a quick smile. Dipper responded by exhaling sharply and
rolling his eyes. Mabel managed to keep the smile on her face.
===============================================================================
Over the next two weeks, Dipper’s physical condition slowly improved, though he
remained in the hospital. The damage to the kidney had been successfully
repaired in surgery, stopping the internal bleeding, but it was still very sore
and tender. His leg was in a cast and his torso was taped to hold his ribs in
place. His mouth was feeling well enough for some real food. The missing teeth
were gone, so he would be chewing on the right side of his mouth from then on,
but otherwise his bones and organs were on the mend.
But his head was another story. Dipper was frustratingly aware that his mental
recovery was progressing very slowly, if at all. The concussion gave him
terrible headaches. Reading made him dizzy, and he couldn’t stand bright light.
The meds he was on softened the edge off the pain in his head and torso, but
also dulled his thoughts: he couldn’t concentrate. The neurologist had
explained that every concussion was unique, and it was impossible to accurately
predict how long the symptoms would persist. She also reluctantly admitted that
in some cases, the symptoms never go away. There was nothing to do but wait for
Dipper’s brain to heal itself.
Mabel had brought homework to the hospital from school, but Dipper could barely
process any of it. School had always been easy for Dipper. Now he stewed over
his inability to do any of his work, knowing that before he could have finished
it in no time. With each passing day, he felt more and more inadequate.
It was during one of her homework tutoring sessions after school that Mabel and
Dipper finally found themselves alone in his room, as their mother had left for
the hospital cafeteria for something to eat, and the other bed in the room had
just been temporarily vacated. Mabel set the homework aside and grasped
Dipper’s hand.
“Dipper, I’m super sorry for everything that’s happened!” she pleaded quietly.
“I didn’t mean all those cray-cray things I said back at the house! I was just
all … stupid. You know that, right?” She paused as Dipper looked at her. “Can
you ever forgive me? Please, pretty please?”
He didn’t answer immediately, shifting his eyes to and from Mabel’s face.
“Yeah, Mabel. We’re okay, I guess,” he mumbled. “I just can’t deal with … you
know,  us  … right now.”
Mabel grasped his hand tighter. “I understand,” she told him sweetly, trying to
hold his gaze. “We’ll deal with this later. We’ll figure out how to be
together, ” pantomiming air quotes, “again real soon, I promise! And I’ll make
it  alllllllll  up to you!” she whispered with a naughty grin.
Dipper looked at his sister with naked astonishment. He pulled back his hand
and shook his head as much as his neck brace would allow.
“What … what are you thinking?” he managed to say slowly. “No … No, we can’t do
any of that! How could that  possibly  happen, Mabel?” Dipper’s voice gained
strength with every word. “Your whole …  angry  thing … was about me already
telling you  that we had to stop all of that before someone discovers us!”
Mabel shrank from Dipper, almost fearful of his tone, but he raised his voice
even more. “And now on top of that, here I am, a useless, special-needs,
learning-impaired  idiot , who can’t read or tolerate looking out a window! Do
you know how that  feels ?” Mabel’s hand went to her mouth as Dipper’s
frustration continued to spew out ever faster. “And a  cripple , besides, who
can’t walk or even wipe his own  ass!  Do you know how  that  feels?!”
Her determination to find a way to repair their love affair was dissolving
rapidly. Her heart desperately tried to hang on to a thread of hope that
everything would be fine.
“So  where  and  when  do you actually think we’re going to have an opportunity
to  fuck  each other, Mabel?!” Dipper growled bitterly.
Everything crumbled down inside of Mabel, collapsing into a horrible, worthless
pile in her gut. Dipper had reduced their most beautiful times together to an
ugly, crude, and shameful level.
Their mother chose that exact moment to re-enter the hospital room. “Hey, you
two! How’s the schoolwork coming along? Making any progress, Dipper?”
Dipper slumped back into his bed. “Not really, Mom. I … I can’t concentrate.
I’m not really feeling up to doing any more right now.”
“Me neither,” Mabel echoed quietly. She turned away from her mother as she
gathered up the books and papers.
“That’s all right, guys,” their mother said. “Pumpkin, why don’t you take your
turn going down to get something to eat?” She was temporarily oblivious to
Mabel’s downturned face. ”No hurry, visiting hours run until eight tonight.”
“No hurry. Got it,” Mabel replied, opening the door to the room. She looked
back at Dipper, and caught his attention as he looked at her.
In an instant, they silently communicated to one another.
Mabel’s pained expression let Dipper know that she was sincerely sorry. She
didn’t want to frustrate or belittle him. Mabel just wanted to make Dipper
happy with her love.
Dipper’s face had softened, his eyes remorseful, offering silent apology. He
knew he was frustrated and went too far, and he desperately wanted to be able
to be with her, too. But there was just  no way  for them to proceed that way
in their family, not as a boy in girl in love.
Their mother noticed Dipper staring at the door, and turned to look at her
daughter. Mabel spun and slipped out before her mother could see her face. She
headed toward the cafeteria, but instead found a stairwell where she was able
to sit alone. She held her face in her hands, but there were no tears. Only an
intense ache that radiated from everywhere.  Isn’t there any way for the
hurting to just … stop?  she wondered miserably to herself.
Back in the hospital room, Dipper closed his eyes as his mother tried to engage
him in conversation. After five minutes, he asked his mother to please let him
rest, and could she go the visitor lounge for awhile? He held it together for
another thirty seconds after she left. No one heard the quiet cries that came
from the room for the next half hour.
The twins were trapped, together but apart. The pain was unspeakable.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 9 *****
===============================================================================
Dipper was released from hospital in the second week of October, after nearly a
month of recovery. His ribs and collarbone were healed enough to no longer
require any bracing, but they still felt tender. His leg was still in a cast,
so crutches were a necessity. Surprisingly, his face appeared almost completely
healed: Dipper was actually impressed that there was practically no outward
sign of the beating he had taken, only some residual bruising and swelling that
would disappear in time. The doctor had told him he was lucky that his
attackers had not hit him on his nose, as broken cartilage rarely heals up
looking the same as before.
Post-concussion syndrome, however, was still a major issue. Dipper had
continuous headaches, a throbbing that never stopped, repeating in wave upon
endless wave. He had been taken off the opiate-based drugs after his major
trauma injuries had largely healed, and was now on a drug called Vanatrip, an
anti-depressant that supposedly had migraine-relief properties. He shuddered to
think that his pain might actually be worse without the drug. He was now able
to focus on his school homework, but at a price of a much sharper brand of pain
than he had at the hospital. He likened it to having a Klingon pain stick
jammed into his head and left on, permanently set to 5 out of 10.
Bright light also exacerbated his headaches. Dipper had taken to wearing large,
dark sunglasses virtually all the time. His mother joked that he looked “super-
cool” in his shades. He knew he didn’t: the glasses weren’t stylish, and they
were chosen so as to block the most outside light possible, but he appreciated
that she was trying to make him feel better.
But the constant pain was taxing. He couldn’t return to school because of his
problems with light and noise. And he was getting  really  tired of it all.
Dipper’s mother quickly established a routine immediately on his return home.
She helped him to the living room couch after breakfast, and he got himself as
comfortable as he could. The shades and curtains on the front window were drawn
to reduce the sunlight as much as possible. He’d rather have gone back to his
room and lay down, but his mother insisted that he had to be dressed and up out
of bed.
On most days, there would be a number of visitors from the neighborhood and
from their church community. On this morning, it was Mr. and Mrs. Zeidenberg,
the neighbors from next door.
After Dipper’s Mom invited them in, the older man waved to Dipper on the couch
and called out, “Dipper! Glad to see you home!”
Dipper gave a small smile and raised his hand. “It’s good to  be  home,” he
replied, while thinking,  Ow! Please keep your voice down! It’s so loud!
Mrs. Zeidenberg walked over and sat on the chair beside the couch. “You’re
looking good, Dipper! Pretty soon no one will know anything happened!”
“Hope so, Mrs. Zeidenberg” he replied politely.  Sure, I’ll look fine on the
outside, but I’ll feel like roadkill inside!
She smiled sweetly. “You must be glad to get out that hospital,” she told him.
“Hospital food is so awful, isn’t it?”
That`s the thousand and fourteenth time I’ve heard someone say that!  Dipper
shrugged. “It wasn’t so bad.”  Hey, mix it up a little, I guess. I’ll go back
to agreement when I hear number one thousand and fifteen.
Mr. Zeidenberg sat down in another chair. “So, Dipper! How’re you feeling?”
There it is! My absolute favorite question! “Thanks for asking! You know … I
feel like shit! It’s like ten red-hot pokers are being pushed in and out of my
head all the time. And your loud, nasally voice just makes it all twice as
bad!”
But, of course, I can’t say that.
“I’m doing okay, I guess,” Dipper answered evenly.
Oh, how I want to be honest. But that would be rude, I know. And they’d get all
uncomfortable, and think I’m a weak little kid, or whatever! I just wish Mom
would quit making me entertain all these people. Like I’m an animal on display!
He missed his friends. Unlike all these adults, having a good geek-out
conversation would have been a welcome distraction from the pain. But Ezra
lived on the opposite side of Piedmont, so it wasn’t easy for him to visit.
Anthony was close by, but he was really busy with Sandra all the time now. Not
only had they both been cast in “Hairspray”, they were pretty much an item now.
So very occasional visits from his two “guy” friends were the best he could
hope for. Even in the best of circumstances, it would have been difficult for
Dipper to maintain good spirits while struggling to tolerate the agony.
===============================================================================
And these were  not  the best of circumstances. Being forced to watch Mabel,
and her reaction to their predicament, made sure of that.
Mabel had the reputation of being an eternal optimist. She was always seeing
the bright side of things, always working to get people to get along and have
fun. She was happy when everyone else was happy. But her life had been
fortunate. She had never in her fourteen years experienced a traumatic loss. No
close family members had ever passed away. She had not been through the death
of a beloved pet. And she had never dealt with the break-up of an intense
relationship. This was her first experience with needing to grieve.
After Dipper’s hospitalization, Mabel had, for a time, fooled herself into
believing that the two of them could still rescue their romance together. But
after Dipper had emphatically rejected that from being possible, Mabel
descended into depression.
In the days after Dipper blew up at her in the hospital room, Mabel’s demeanor
changed. The appetite and bizarre eating habits she was legendary for
immediately went away, and she ate very little. Her exuberant energy
disappeared, and her preference for fun and silliness waned. She didn’t want to
visit with her girlfriends, and showed no interest in willingly picking up the
slack in doing family chores. Also, she seemed tired all the time, and went to
bed earlier than she normally did.
Her mother hoped that Dipper’s return from hospital might give Mabel a jolt of
happiness by giving her a chance to dote on her brother, but instead she seemed
to be trying to avoid him. On the week Dipper came home, Mabel would disappear
into her room soon after walking in the door from school.
Mabel was lying on her bed, headphones in her ears, when her mother peeked in
her room. “Pumpkin,” she called, “can you please help Dipper with the work you
brought home? I’ve got him sitting at the dining table.”
At the mention of helping Dipper, Mabel slouched. “And what is with the
attitude towards your brother, young lady?” her mother scolded. “You promised
you were past that! He’s only been home a few days, and you barely emerge to
speak to anyone. Come out and help, Mabel. We need you!”
“Yes, Mama,” Mabel droned, dragging herself to her feet. She reluctantly headed
toward the dining room.
She timidly pulled out the chair next to where her brother sat at the table.
“Hey, Broski,” she said carefully, trying to keep her voice quiet.
“Hey, Mabes,” Dipper replied, looking down through his sunglasses at the
homework while cradling his head in his hands.
Neither twin had the ability to smile.
Rather than dwell on their mutual discomfort, they worked though Dipper’s Math
and History class work. Dipper picked up the statistics concepts from Math well
enough, but the assignment on the American Revolution required a lot of
reading, then filling in the answers to a series of questions about the
important battles of the war.
Dipper was having trouble recalling what he’d just read about the Siege of
Yorktown. As was his habit when he was thinking, Dipper chewed on his pen as he
tried to recall the date of the surrender of the British troops, and
accidentally cracked the shell of his pen, thankfully avoiding an ink leak. He
looked around on the table for a replacement pen. Seeing Mabel’s, he reached
out in front of her to retrieve it.
Mabel saw that Dipper had chewed another pen to death, and was looking around
to steal yet another one from her. Hers was right in front of her, so she
decided to just hand it over and went to grab it.
Her hand got there a split second before his. Dipper’s palm landed on the back
of Mabel’s hand.
The twins froze. Mabel’s breath caught in her chest: she turned her head and
apprehensively peered sideways to her brother. Dipper swallowed. His expression
was unreadable behind the glasses.
Then, slowly, Dipper began squeezing her hand, interlacing his fingers into
hers. His lips parted as he unsteadily took a breath. His head turned slightly
towards her.
Mabel’s eyes immediately became wet, and she let out her breath with a shudder.
She felt Dipper’s sweaty palm grip the back of her hand, which she opened up as
his fingers curled around hers, and she squeezed back. She tried in vain to see
his eyes through the glasses, to make a connection with him again.
Then he yanked his hand back quickly as their mother whisked in from the
kitchen. “Supper’s close to ready. You guys clear off the table in about ten
minutes, all right?” They both nodded, Dipper adding a simple “OK”, and their
mother returned to the kitchen.
An awkward silence followed. Both were staring straight ahead, neither one of
them moving. Then Dipper whispered, “We … can’t do that again, Mabel.”
“I know,” Mabel replied in a barely audible breath.
There was another pause, then Dipper looked down and murmured “I’m sorry.”
Mabel turned away and put the pen down in front of him. “Here.” Her voice broke
into a high-pitched squeak.
“Thanks,” he muttered in reply. He picked up the pen and continued his task of
answering questions on the assignment.
It’s hopeless , Mabel despaired to herself.  It’s over! We’re never going to be
what we were, ever again! Dipper’s  never  going to let me back in. So that’s
it! No more fun. No more closeness. No more … love!
And yet … here he is, right beside me! A constant reminder of what we were.
What’s every morning at breakfast going to be like? “Hey Bro-bro, good morning!
Pass the milk, will ya? Sure, here’s the jam for your toast. You ready for that
math test? Say, remember when we were super-bonkers head-over-heels in love
with each other? … When everything was so great, and … perfect … for about a
couple of weeks or so? Yeah … good times … huh? …”
Mabel turned back to Dipper, who was trying to complete a paragraph on
Cornwallis’ surrender to Washington. He sensed Mabel watching him, and his pen
stopped. He bit his bottom lip and his chest trembled slightly. But he wouldn’t
look up and over to her.
She couldn’t stay there any longer. Wordlessly, Mabel got up from the table,
managing to stifle a sob. She made her way back towards her room, telling her
mother she wasn’t hungry as she passed the kitchen.
===============================================================================
It was when a phone call came from the school that Mabel’s parents knew there
was something seriously wrong.
The principal of the school informed her mother that there had been reports by
three teachers of Mabel’s disturbing behavior traits and lowered quality of her
work. She was neglecting to complete homework assignments. She had forgotten to
complete work in a group project and cost her team marks. And (most concerning
to her parents) she appeared at all times disinterested in doing a good job.
None of this was close to normal for their daughter, so an appointment was made
for Mabel to see the Pines family’s doctor.
Mabel’s father had taken time off work to take her to the doctor’s appointment.
The physician’s first recommendation was that Mabel should have a chance to see
a therapist, a professional who could help her through pain of whatever was
bothering her. Unfortunately, such therapy was not covered under Mr. Pines’
benefits package at work. There were also hospital fees that had been beyond
the plan’s coverage. Combined with his wife’s complete sacrifice of her income
over the last month, and the ill-timed backyard renovation, there simply was no
money left for new bills.
Instead, the doctor prescribed Prozac for Mabel’s condition. A common
antidepressant, it is given to countless teenagers to combat major depressive
disorders. The doctor talked to Mabel, and she explained to her how the drug
needed to be taken as prescribed, and what changes she should expect to see in
herself and her emotions.
Work-related email continued to fly through Mabel’s father’s phone as the
doctor explained how the drug works. He was mentally distracted, and completely
failed to absorb the doctor’s warning about how sometimes an antidepressant
can, in fact, have the completely opposite effect on a person than that which
is intended. Sometimes the medication can make the symptoms  worse , and that
signs for this needs to be watched for.
===============================================================================
As October went on, Dipper continued to fall further and further behind on his
schoolwork. Despite his intelligence, he was missing a lot of content by not
being in class. Reading a textbook is no substitute for participating in a
lecture in a classroom. And Dipper’s problems with reading meant that even that
wasn’t being done on most days.
Combined with the removal of his leg cast and his mother’s need to return to
her clients and start having an income again, Dipper was told it was time to go
back to school on the last week of the month. His leg and ribs were still
tender, but that wasn’t Dipper’s main concern. He complained to his mother that
his headaches would be too much to deal with, and he needed something stronger
so that he could tolerate things better. But their family doctor thought that
he needed to remain off strong painkillers after being on them so long in the
hospital. She suggested he take Tylenol in addition to his existing migraine
medication.
The twins were driven to school that Monday. As Dipper slowly eased his way out
of the car, his mother called out to Mabel, “You’ll watch out for him today,
right, Pumpkin?”
“Mom!” Dipper moaned from behind his sunglasses and under his pulled-down cap.
“I’m not a little kid! I can take care of myself!”
After getting a death-stare from her mother, Mabel mutely nodded, and the twins
uncomfortably walked into the school together as their mother drove off.
Dipper’s first day back was difficult. The lights in the classrooms dazzled
painfully in his eyes, even with the sunglasses. The material being covered was
unfamiliar, and he was embarrassed by how stupid he felt. Random loud noises,
like a chair squeaking across the floor, shot pain into his head.
But it was even worse between classes and at lunchtime. The cacophony of
students moving between classrooms all at once just about overwhelmed Dipper’s
ability to cope. And it wasn’t helped by the fact that it was well known why he
had been away from school. Some “clever” students felt they needed to remind
him about how much of a wimp he was for getting himself beat up in the first
place.
Mabel was torn as she saw these things happening. An old part of her wanted to
leap to Dipper’s side, helping him when he needed assistance and defending him
from those jerks. But her thick layer of low spirits smothered her instincts.
And then, when she  did  come halfheartedly to his defense once after lunch
hour, Dipper resented needing help, not wanting it to look like he needed his
sister to protect him. He snapped at her, and told her to let him handle things
himself. Backing away and watching Dipper suffer pain and embarrassment from a
distance only made Mabel feel worse, and only deepened her depression.
===============================================================================
The twins did not share the same class in their final period. As Dipper endured
English class as best he could, he cursed the constant pain in his head.  This
isn’t fair, no one else here has to put up with this! I can’t just keep this
up, I’m going to lose it on someone for sure!
Near the end of the class, the teacher produced a quick fifteen minute silent
mini essay-writing assignment. Dipper half-assed something onto his paper just
to get it over with, set his elbows on his desk, and rubbed his skull firmly,
flexing his fingers into his hair over and over. The long day was really
getting to him.
As the buzzer sounded (loudly, Dipper noted for the eighth time that day) to
mark the end of the period, Dipper was in no hurry to rush out into the madness
of the homeward bound frenzy in the hallway. He stayed at his desk, waiting for
the mayhem to calm down.
Mabel’s friend Aisha stopped at his desk on her way to the classroom door. “Hey
Dipper,” she said kindly. “Not feelin’ so good?”
Dipper appreciated that Aisha wasn’t expecting him to sugar-coat how he was
feeling. He shook his head. “Just waiting out the crush. I’d rather not go out
there until it slows down a bit.” Then he remembered something. “Do you have a
minute, Aisha?”
“I got to get to rehearsal for ‘Hairspray’, pretty much now.”
“This won’t take a second,” Dipper said, as they were now the only ones left in
the classroom. Even the teacher had gathered her books and was gone. “Mabel
said one time that you know pretty much everyone in the school?”
Aisha waved offhandedly and smiled widely. “Aw, you know me, always gettin’ all
up in everyone’s  biz -ness! Yeah! Why? What’s up with my Mabel’s little bro-
bro?” she smirked teasingly.
Dipper groaned, but forged ahead. “She mentioned a senior that you know named
‘Riley’? Is that right?”
She placed a hand on her hip and raised an eyebrow dramatically. “Riley’s cool
and all, but she’s into some  serious  shit that ain’t down in  your  comfort
zone!” She tilted her head and squinted with suspicion. “Why you wantin’ to
look  her  up?”
“I don’t know, just some stuff,” he said evasively, increasing the pressure of
his fingers massaging his head. “Can you help me so I can … talk to her about
something?”
===============================================================================
Three days later on Thursday night, the Pines family was at the dinner table.
Neither of the kids had eaten much, and both were even more quiet than normal.
“Dip?” asked their mother. “You’re not complaining about your head, and you
seem less bothered tonight. Is the pain getting better?”
Dipper winced and rubbed his scalp. “Maybe just a little, I guess. I think I’m
covering it up better.”
“Well, don’t stop taking the Tylenol on top of the Vanatrip, it seems to be
working a bit now,” she replied with some relief. Then she turned to Mabel.
“Did you take your extra med tonight?” The prescription had called for the
dosage of the Prozac to increase that morning.
Mabel answered without really looking up. “Yeah, Mama,” she replied without any
spark of her normal self.
Their father was looking back and forth at his children, taking a sip of his
tea. “Tonight’s going to be a bit different, it’ll be the first time since you
were babies that you won’t be out. You two going to help us at the door?”
Dipper didn’t clue in to what his father was talking about, and didn’t
particularly care to find out. “No, I just want to relax for a bit, Dad. And
I’ve got a pile of homework.”
Their father looked pointedly at Mabel. She knew what he was referring to, and
it tore her apart, but finally had to answer. “Yeah, me too, Daddy,” she said
without enthusiasm. “I’ve got a Biology assignment due for Monday, I’ll work on
it tonight … I think I’ll start now,” she finished quietly. As she headed to
her room, Dipper also excused himself and gingerly made his way towards the
bedroom hallway.
Concerned looks were exchanged between the twins’ parents. Adolescence, and
Dipper’s slow recovery, seemingly had damaged the twins, their bond, and the
whole family as a result. Not for the first time, they started discussing what
they could do to repair their family unit. They were just coming up with a plan
when the doorbell rang. They smiled ruefully, and went to the door to start
their annual duty.
Ahh,  thought Dipper, as he carefully steadied himself on the frame of his door
before closing it. In private, he didn’t need to focus nearly so hard now on
how he looked while walking. He half shuffled, half stumbled across the room,
towards his bed.  The pain’s not nearly as bad as it was!  he thought idly.
He pursed his lips and turned to look at his desk. His backpack was sitting
there, heavy with textbooks and binders. He remembered that he had a lot of
homework tonight.  Why?  he wondered.  Oh … right! Catching up from all the
time I missed. And … also because I didn’t feel like doing anything in class
time today. And you know what? Fuck it! I don’t feel like it now, either. I
just want to lay down.
Dipper performed a horrible pirouette at the foot of his bed, doing the spin on
his newly healed leg. He almost lost balance, but leaped up and back with
enough dexterity to actually land on his mattress with a loud springy creak. He
chuckled quietly to himself.  I am so excellent!  he mused.
But … ow!  he realized,  my leg hurts. Why’s my leg hurting? One stupid little
spin before jumping on the bed, and my leg gets all pissy? That’s not fair!
Well … that’s easily fixed!
Dipper reached into the back of his side-table’s upper drawer, pulling out a
small pharmacy bottle.  Just one of these, and my leg will feel a lot better.
Hmm … better make it two to be safe.
After grabbing an opened bottle of Coke from his dresser, he tossed two
Oxycontin tablets into his mouth, and washed them down with the flat, room
temperature soda. He dropped the bottle of pills back in the drawer, noting
that it was already about half empty.  Yup, Riley was right, these  are  good!
I’m definitely getting a larger bottle from her next time! I’ve still got some
money saved from the summer. I’d better find her tomorrow....
Dipper’s eyes almost closed as he reclined his head onto his pillow.  Ahh,
blessed relief,  he thought again with joy, eagerly awaiting the growth of the
soothing, spiralling feeling that he was already very accustomed to.  Blessed
relief … just, why’s the doorbell ringing so fucking much tonight? Go away …
want to relax … just relax … yessssss …
===============================================================================
Mabel’s assignment for biology was in front of her on her desk. She was seated,
pen in hand, physically ready to begin work.
She wasn’t close to mentally ready.
It’s Halloween,  was all she could think about.
Halloween was always  our  event, our big day! Who cares if we’re fourteen? Who
cares if we’re in high school? I’d have dragged Dipper’s lame-ass down to the
costume store if I’d have thought he could go. But he can’t. And apparently,
given how he’s feeling tonight, he doesn’t even  want  to, either.
The doorbell rang again. She pictured the children, small (and sometimes not-
so-small) kids running from house to house, visiting as many as they could,
happily receiving the good, non-loser candy from Mama or Daddy at their door.
Kids like she and Dipper used to be.
Mabel got up and pulled her Halloween memory book from the shelf. She started
at the beginning and stared at the photos, with their cute, complimentary
outfits, every one of them, right back to when they were two-month-old infants.
She held her expression, keeping it neutral as she studied the photos of two
happy children, year after year, growing closer each year. Thirteen Halloweens
in all.
And an extra two bonus pages, too: they had been lucky to be up in Gravity
Falls for Summerween the last two summers. Peanut butter and jelly last year.
Link and Zelda this year.  My gosh, we worked together so hard up in the attic
in the evenings after work was done, just to be ready for Summerween this year,
she recalled.  They turned out so well, and everyone loved them! Even the
people like Grunkle Stan who had no idea who we were supposed to be.
Swallowing, Mabel turned the page to the space reserved for Halloween this
year.
Blank. It would always be blank.
Forever.
The book slipped from her fingers and fell to the floor with a thud. Mabel’s
face crumbled, bottled-up tears now cascading down her cheeks. Sobbing quietly,
she concluded that “blank” was as good as life was going to be, from now on.
Empty, joyless … just … EXISTENCE! That’s all life is, now!
I don’t want this. I … can’t  live  like this! I’d rather just … not … live …
Mabel curled up on top of her bed, soft cries continuing to fill her room.
===============================================================================
November came. Leaves turned, and temperatures fell a bit more. There was more
cold rain. Christmas decorations appeared in stores and public buildings.
Thanksgiving dinners were eaten, and there was Black Friday shopping.
At Piedmont High School, the production of “Hairspray” was a big success.
Everyone marvelled at the performance of Aisha, who stole the show in her role
as Inez Stubbs. Following the show’s closing night, she was immediately asked
to join the school’s glee club, and she instantly accepted. Jordan and Juanita
had only minor ensemble roles in the play, but at Aisha’s insistence they
auditioned for the club, and both were also invited to join. Since all three
were used to being at practice for the play all the time, additional time at
lunch hour and after school were no problem as they learned new songs and dance
routines.
Anthony’s relationship with Sandra intensified during the run-up to the show’s
debut, and they spent virtually all of their time together. When the show
closed, they finally had time to go on their first real “date”, and their
standing as a couple was made official. Rare was the moment that their eyes
were on anybody but each other.
Ezra had given up on the “Nerd Club” idea in late September (with Anthony
always busy and Dipper in hospital). He was now fully embedded in the school’s
photography club. The veteran members of the club, all of them in upper grades,
admired Ezra’s skills with a camera. He liked being befriended by older
students, who also never teased him about his weight, and spent most of his
free time with his new friends.
On Monday after Thanksgiving, Dipper carefully picked his way through the
cafeteria at lunchtime. The soothing numbness from the two Oxy pills he’d taken
that morning was starting to wear off, and he was feeling the compulsion for a
couple more. He willed himself to at least wait until after lunch. He
approached the table where he used to always sit with Anthony and Ezra in those
first couple of weeks of school, and as usual these days, the seats were empty.
Before he sat down, he glanced up out of habit to where Mabel and her posse of
friends usually sat. Mabel was there, sitting alone, staring at the table as
she chewed her sandwich.
Dipper had spent the last several weeks stewing in self-pity, and revelling in
the haze of the painkillers he was taking. It occurred to him, seeing Mabel
sitting alone, that he’d been ignoring her for quite awhile. And it also
appeared that she looked none too happy.
He walked over to her table. “Hey, Mabes,” he said tentatively, standing across
the table from his sister. She looked up with an interest level barely on this
side of zero. He ploughed ahead. “Mind if I eat lunch with you?”
Mabel’s face lowered slowly back down to the table. “Knock yourself out, Bro,”
she answered without enthusiasm.
As Dipper sat, he saw for the first time just how low Mabel was. Internally, he
kicked himself for how little he'd been paying attention to her lately. He
reached over and tapped her elbow. "Wanna talk about anything?" he asked
gently.
Mabel swallowed the bite of her sandwich, but didn't look up. "What's the
point?" she grumbled softly. "Is anything gonna change between us?"
Dipper suspected that was what was bothering her. He removed his sunglasses:
the light didn’t hurt at all anymore, not while he was on Riley’s magic pills,
but he had gotten used to not having to look anyone in the eye. Now, though, he
found he wanted Mabel to see him, and he leaned over the table. "Mabel, you
have to believe me when I say I still lo- ... still care about you," he
muttered.
His sister’s head didn’t move, but her eyes darted accusingly to him. “You
can’t even say it out loud,” she hissed, “not even whisper it, when no one is
listening!”
“No, I can’t!” he hissed back, aware of other students sitting at nearby
tables. “What would happen if …”
“I don’t care!” Mabel cut him off, whispering harshly. “Because it doesn’t
matter, does it? Even if I  do  believe you … what’s the point?” she repeated.
“What good is it, if knowing that only makes everything feel  worse? "
Dipper sat frozen, unable to respond.
“I can’t  take  this, Dipper!” she continued. “How am I supposed to just keep
going all hunky dory happy lappy, like nothing’s different, like nothing’s
changed!!  We  have  changed!  Everything  has changed! We’re … we’re much
more  than what we were … and I can’t go back. I  can’t , Dipper!”
The thought that anyone might be listening was rapidly becoming much less
important to Dipper by the second, as he was starting to comprehend just how
much pain Mabel was in. “If this is about what I said at the hospital, before
Mom came in the room, about how I got mad at you because you wanted to .. you
know …”
Mabel shook her head. She glanced around, then spoke quietly. “Making love with
you was wonderful ... and yeah, I miss it, but … it’s not  just  that ... it’s
all of it!  And we have  none  of it! I know it's dangerous, but you say I
can't kiss you. I can't touch you! I can't  talk  to you. I ..." she gestured
helplessly, staring at the half-eaten lunch on the table, "I can't even  look
at you!"
Dipper sat in helpless paralysis as Mabel continued. "If you weren’t always
with me, maybe I could move on. But you  are  always with me! At school, at
home, at church! … If I hated you for this, or you hated me, then maybe … but
we  don’t! ” She closed her eyes as tears began streaming down her face. “I
love  you, Dip! And I know you love me, too!” she whispered, wiping her face
with the napkin Dipper had pressed into her hands.
Dipper's instincts screamed at him, demanding he comfort his sister: he wanted
to take her hands, hold her in his arms, and kiss her pain away. But he also
was keenly aware that many students in the cafeteria had now taken notice of
them, that Mabel was crying for some reason.  Maybe if I get her outside, we
can find a little private place,  he thought.
“C’mon, Mabel …” he began.
But she misinterpreted the start of his sentence, thinking he just wanted to
shut her down and stop making a scene. She threw her face to the ceiling,
pulling air sharply through her nose, and quickly stood. Still avoiding
Dipper’s eyes, she gathered up the remains of her lunch. “You’re right! Stop
snivelling, stiff upper lip, all that jazz! I got it, Sir Dipshit!” she
declared, loud enough that it triggered muffled laughter from nearby tables.
Dipper knew it would be impossible to have a conversation now, and he allowed
Mabel to leave without any further words between them.
Dipper sat alone for a moment, lost in thoughts of what his sister had just
told him. Then he looked around, and noticed that other students were still
curiously peering his way, wondering what was up with these two notoriously
moody twins. Scowling, he shoved his sunglasses on his face, threw his
untouched lunch into a garbage bin, and headed for the exit. He dug into a
pocket for his bottle of Oxycontin, fished out three tablets, and quickly
washed them down at a drinking fountain before disappearing out into the
hallway.
===============================================================================
As the autumn school semester came to a close, the mood inside the home of the
Pines family did not match the merriment of the approaching Christmas season.
Mabel and Dipper had managed to eke out passing grades for all of their
classes, assuming they managed to not completely flunk their final exams. It
was the worst showing for either of them in all their years in school, and not
a good way to start their high school careers. While Dipper, at least in the
mind of his teachers, had a valid excuse, Mabel simply came across as a
distant, disinterested, and underachieving teenager.
There was just one more day of exams left, and then the two-week break for
Christmas and New Years would begin. It was Thursday evening and Dipper was in
his room, trying to cram some more details about American history into his
fuzzy brain, and hoping it stayed there for at least twenty-four hours.
A knock at his door interrupted his studying. “Come in,” he called out, looking
up from his books, expecting one of his parents.
He was surprised to see Mabel opening the door, holding the same history
textbook for their exam the next morning. They’d mostly stayed away from each
other for the last month. Dipper found isolation to be somehow less painful
than facing his sister, and their feelings for one another. Not for the first
time, he noticed the grim expression on her face, and wondered if he should be
even more worried about her. Sometimes it seemed like she was an entirely
different person, someone who just didn’t care about anything, specifically
herself.
She leaned on the frame of Dipper’s bedroom door awkwardly. “Got a sec,
Broseph?” she asked morosely.
“Yeah. Of course, Mabes,” Dipper replied sincerely, turning his chair towards
her. “Want to … study for the exam together?”
“Sure,” Mabel replied, closing the door behind her and leaning back against it.
“Actually, no, not really.” She paused for a moment of uncomfortable silence.
“Can I borrow something off of you?”
“Uh, yeah, I guess,” Dipper replied. “What do you need?”
“Umm … “ Mabel sighed, twisting her hair in her hand. “Can I have some of those
pills you take?”
Dipper’s eyes widened. Trying to play it cool, he replied, “You’re … not
allowed to take my meds ... Mom keeps them in the cupboard, and I take them
from there. She’d notice if any of them were missing. And besides, they
wouldn’t really do anything …”
Mabel exhaled and rolled her eyes. “You  know  what pills I’m talking about,
Dumbass!” she shot back softly. “The ones you’re buying at school!”
He gaped, unprepared for the ambush. “How … how did you know?” he stammered,
wondering how much trouble he was in.
“I’m not an imbecile! I’ve known for a long time. Aisha told me when she first
introduced you to Riley …before she got too busy to spend any time with me,
like everybody else,” Mabel grumbled.
Dipper’s heart rate slowed a bit, as it looked like Mabel was not going to bust
him to their parents. He regarded her carefully. “Why do you want those pills?”
he asked.
“They take away pain, don’t they? They make you feel better? … I don’t want any
more pain, either. I want to see if they’ll … make me feel better, too.”
“Yeah, but …” Dipper said worriedly, “they don’t work on  that  kind of pain,
Mabel. You’re already taking  your  stuff for that, aren’t you?”
Mabel snorted with derision. “Yeah, and they’re working  so  well, I’ve been
feeling so great for the last two months!” She stared at her brother. “C’mon,
let me have a few. Like, maybe a dozen or so, so I can see if they work for
me.”
He considered her request. The gentle and relaxing euphoria that he felt after
taking Oxy might not make him feel  better , per se, but they certainly were a
distraction from dealing with stuff that made him feel  worse . Perhaps they’d
be able to distract Mabel from the stuff that bothered her, as well. Dipper
sighed. “All right,” he said.
Reaching his hand under his bed, he felt around in a hole he had cut into the
box spring, then pulled out a bag with two large bottles of pills. He dumped
several into his palm, counting out twelve, as Mabel walked over to him.
“So you know you have to take it easy with these, right?” Dipper said. “You’ll
feel it when you take just one, and with two you can get really spaced. More
than that and …” Dipper stopped, as Mabel’s expression became one of
contemplation as he started talking about what happens when a larger quantity
of pills are consumed.
Dipper began reopening the bottle, preparing to put the pills back. “Maybe you
should just try one, and see what that feels like.”
“No!” Mabel piped up, then more calmly, said, “No, Dipper, just … just let me
have the dozen in your hand.”
A chill ran down Dipper’s spine as he heard quiet desperation in his sister’s
voice. Adrenaline pushed the remaining haze from his mind. “Why?” he asked
fearfully.
Mabel’s silence and intense glare was more than enough to tell him exactly why.
Dipper stood quickly, knocking his chair over onto the floor, and grabbed
Mabel’s arm with his empty hand. “Mabel …  No! ” he rasped, in shock. “Why are
you  thinking  about stuff like that?”
Her jaw set, and one of her eyes narrowed. Dipper recognized it as Mabel’s tell
that she was about to take action. As a result, he was prepared when she lunged
for his hand, the one with the pills gripped in his palm. Moving with a
dexterity he never knew he had, Dipper used Mabel’s momentum against her and
threw her past him onto his bed. Then in one smooth motion, he dumped the loose
pills into the pill bag, folded it over, and whipped the entire bag into the
back of his closet. As Mabel got back to her feet, Dipper slammed the closet
door, and stood in front of it.
They stared at each other, Mabel with determination born of desperation, Dipper
panting in frightened panic. For over a minute, but for what seemed an
eternity, neither moved an inch.
Mabel’s resolve cracked first. Her expression slowly collapsed from defiance to
despair. “Dipper …  please !” she croaked softly.
“ No , Mabel!” he implored. “I can’t! Not  ever!  You … you  can’t  do anything
like that! …  Why,  Mabel? Why would you try to  do  this?” Dipper’s voice was
quivering with barely controlled emotion.
Mabel’s expression twisted as she released her dejection. “Are you serious,
Dipper? You don’t  know ? How can you  not  know? Ever since … ever since the
day before we came home from Gravity Falls, when … when Grunkle Stan told us
that he knew about us! Nothing has been good since! Everything has been  hell!
And now, we’ve got Christmas, less than a week away! Everyone’s supposed to be
so happy!  It’s supposed to be the most joyful, giving, loving time of the
year! And I don’t feel  any of that!! ”
Her face contorted even more. “I can’t  do  this anymore,” she whimpered. “I’ve
tried! I’ve  tried!!  Nothing’s changed! Nothing’s better! I’m miserable,
Dipper! I’m  so  miserable, I can’t  stand  it!!” She drew a shuddering gasp.
“I don’t want to  live  like this, if this is what living is going to be like!
… I … I just …  can’t!!”  Mabel slowly sank to her knees, curling her head
down, her body jerking as she forced her chest muscles to contain her sobs.
Dipper knelt down in front of her and gripped her shoulders. Mabel shook
violently, not wanting his touch as she continued to weep forcefully, but
quietly. Dipper stayed in front of her, trying to hold back his own tears.
“Mabel ... you need help! You’ve … we’ve got to tell Mom and Dad about this!”
Mabel shook her head firmly, her chin still pinned to her chest. “Please,
Mabel, I’ll … I’ll go tell them myself! You have to let me …”
She drew a large breath. “ No,  Dipper!” she snarled. “I said  no!  If you tell
them … I’ll tell them about your pills!” as she glared at her brother
threateningly.
As Dipper looked back at Mabel in horror, they heard a call from down the hall
from their mother. “Dip! Pumpkin! Are you guys busy right now?”
Dipper continued his unwanted staring contest with Mabel as he loudly replied,
“We’re studying for our history exam tomorrow, Mom!”
“Well, can you take a break for a few minutes?” she called back. “We have some
good news to tell you!”
Mabel bitterly stared back at Dipper. “We’ll be right there, Mama!” she yelled.
“Okay, thanks!” they heard their mother reply, as the twins slowly calmed down
and reluctantly prepared to once again cover up the harsh reality of their
relationship together, and present themselves to their parents as “normally” as
they could.
===============================================================================
“We’re doing  what  for Christmas?” Dipper asked in confusion.
Their mother smiled with fake enthusiasm. “We’re getting away from here! The
last few months have been pretty awful, with everything that’s happened. We
thought we needed to pull out of here and get a change of scenery. It will do
us  all  some good!”
Mabel had a tiny sliver of adventure that even major depression couldn’t
entirely cover up. “So, we’re taking a vacation somewhere?”
It was their father’s turn to put on a smile. “Well, we considered getting a
place at a resort in Mexico, or a Caribbean island, but the rates for places
like that during the holidays are really high. And even if we could justify
spending the money, every place we tried that looks any good was already booked
up. So … we’re doing the next best thing!”
The twins looked to and from each of their parents impatiently. “What?” they
asked in unison.
Their mother grinned. “We’re all driving up to Oregon, and we’re going to spend
Christmas with your Grunkle Stan in Gravity Falls!” she practically squealed,
shaking her fists quickly back and forth in front of her in a display of forced
excitement.
Mabel and Dipper’s mouths both dropped open. Against their will, their heads
turned to each other in disbelief.
They were going to be sitting next to each other in the back seat of the car
for almost ten hours each way. They were going to have to do family holiday
activities together. They were going to be sleeping in the same room together.
All with their parents right there watching every move, thinking that they were
helping the twins heal their friendship.
All with Grunkle Stan seeing all of this, knowing exactly what had happened to
cause all of this misery between the kids.
The twins silently knew that this was the worst plan for Christmas that could
possibly have been conceived by man or deity. Their faces betrayed their
absolute lack of enthusiasm.
“Oh, come on!” their mother said, trying to excite the kids. “It’ll be a mini-
adventure, like some of those stories we heard about your first summer up
there. It’ll be fun, I promise!” She clapped her hands together eagerly. “Hey!
I know! Why don’t you two do my favorite thing to celebrate? Do that .. fist
bumping … thing you do! It’s always the cutest!”
Dipper and Mabel again looked at each other, dreading what they were being
asked to do. Despite the months of hard feelings, despite the tension and
threats uttered just minutes ago in Dipper’s room, this was almost too much for
both of them. The fistbump was  theirs , their private symbol of love between
them. They hadn’t performed the action in over three months.
Mabel bit her lower lip as she balled up her hand in front of her. Dipper
closed his eyes and raised his own fist.
Their fists lightly tapped together in the most unsatisfying fistbump ever
performed in history.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 10 *****
Chapter Notes
     Author's Note 1: So going back to the original "Fistbump", I was not
     expecting The Author (Stanford) to make it past the series finale, so
     he is not in this story (no specific explanation as to what happened
     to him). I also did not anticipate that Grunkle Stan would give up
     the Mystery Shack, which of course also means that I didn't
     anticipate Soos becoming the new proprietor. These assumptions were
     wrong, but cannot be modified.
     Author's Note 2: The end of this chapter marks the completion of the
     chapters that had been last updated elsewhere in February 2016.
     Starting with Chapter 11, this will be new content. I will be
     updating every other day instead of every day.
===============================================================================
“Thanks again for letting us come up on such short notice, Uncle Stan.”
Stanley Pines stretched out his back, then greeted his oldest nephew at the
front door of Mystery Shack, as the younger man clomped snow off his feet and
walked up the step. “No problem, and Merry Christmas, kid! Nice to see you
finally make it up here after all these years!”
The twins’ father was exhausted after the long drive, but still smiled as he
exhaled in mock exasperation. “I’m a grown man, with a family of my own! Do you
think you might finally be able to call me something other than ‘kid’?” he
exclaimed with a short laugh. “Like, oh I don’t know, maybe my  name ?”
“Not a chance, kid!” Stan retorted back with a grin, grabbing hold of a hand
and pulling his nephew into a brief embrace. Then he paused awkwardly, looking
past to where the family’s car was parked in the snowy driveway, to where the
twins and their mother were gathering bags to be brought inside from the cold.
“Uhh … before the others get in earshot, I was hoping to get a chance to
explain what happened, you know, with me and your Uncle Stanford last summer …”
His nephew waved off any concern. “Please don’t worry about it, Uncle Stan,” he
quietly assured him. “It took Dip and Mabel a while to explain it to us last
fall, but I think we understand. We don’t need to dredge up bad memories over
Christmas. Especially ....” He paused, then continued softly. “Especially not
with the way things are now.”
Stan’s voice also lowered, concern obvious in his face. “How’re they doing? Any
different since you two called me a few days ago with this plan of yours to
come up here?” His only reply was a brief, sad shake of the head, as the rest
of family was coming up the steps to the front porch.
Mabel was first to her Grunkle, dropping her bags and hugging her arms around
his waist while pressing her cheek against his chest. Stan returned the
embrace, but noticed instantly that Mabel’s squeeze around him was a fraction
of her normal death-grip, and that her expression and voice had none of her
normal exuberance. She looked tired and defeated, so completely unlike the
great-niece he had come to know so well.
As Dipper waited with his arms full, Stan gave him a quick glance. He’d seen
his great nephew in some pretty bad ways before, but never before had the boy’s
eyes been so red and glazed, nor had his overall hygiene appeared so neglected.
Stan gripped Dipper’s shoulder and shook it gently, drawing a tired half-smile
from the teen.
The kids put on brave faces, but they didn’t fool their Grunkle in the
slightest. Dipper and Mabel were suffering, and he knew precisely why. They had
not put  anything  that happened over the last week of summer behind them. He
didn’t need to know any details of what had happened between the twins since
he’d last seen them on Labor Day weekend. They still had feelings for each
other, and were completely unable to deal with their emotions in any kind of
healthy way. And he would never be able to tell their parents how to help them,
not without revealing their secret. Stan knew his nephew (and his wife) would
never condone or tolerate the truth about the twins. If he was going to help
these kids, he’d have to try to find another way.
===============================================================================
The Pines family had arrived in Gravity Falls on Saturday evening, having
driven straight through after getting up early the morning after the twins’
final exams. The plan was that they would be staying for two weeks, returning
home the weekend after New Year’s. They barely had any time to pack before
leaving, so the contents of the bags were haphazardly tossed together. Dipper’s
suitcase, in particular, seemed to simply contain whatever he found on his
bedroom floor immediately before heading out the door.
Dipper was alone in the chilly attic, sorting through his belongings with his
suitcase on his bed, when Stan came up the stairs. Dipper subtly threw one of
his thick flannel button-up shirts over a large black book that was near his
pillow as his great uncle rapped his knuckle on the door frame.
“Hey kid! Your mom’s got Mabel helping her with cleanup after dinner, and your
dad’s down unpacking their stuff in Ford’s old room. How you doing up here?”
Dipper looked around the attic soberly. “Everything’s pretty much like we left
it. Thanks, Grunkle Stan.” Dipper went back to sorting through his clothes and
books, leaving the room in uncomfortable silence.
“So … I guess maybe I should go over those boxing tips again with you, huh,
kid? Maybe you need another lesson, am I right?” Stan poked at Dipper with a
mischievous grin. Dipper pointedly turned away, his reaction making it plain
that he didn’t appreciate the attempted humor at his expense.
Stan squeezed the bridge of his nose. “Ahh … sorry Dipper. I’ve taken a beating
before, but nothing like I heard you got. You hangin’ in there? How’s the old
noggin doing?”
Dipper shrugged. “It’s better than it was, I guess.” He shivered. “It’s kinda
cold up here. Isn’t there any heat in the attic?”
“Not a lot, sorry. Only what comes up the stairs. You’ll have to leave the door
open, or you’ll freeze up here. But … for right now ...” Stan paused again, and
gently closed the door. “Kid, can I … uh, do you mind if your old grunkle
offers .. you know, a suggestion?”
The teenager flushed, and let his head drop in mild exasperation. “Grunkle
Stan, I forced a stop to everything physical between Mabel and I. We aren’t
going to “try” anything while we’re up here, certainly not with the door open,
if that’s what you’re talking about,” he muttered sourly, staring into his
suitcase.
Stan rubbed his forehead, sympathizing with his great nephew for the weight of
all the emotional baggage he had been carrying inside him, and Dipper hadn’t
even guessed at the actual uncomfortable subject he had intended to raise.
“Thanks, but that’s not it …” Stan leveled his gaze at Dipper, speaking quietly
but firmly. “I was hoping that you’d want to hand over whatever it is that
you’re taking, before I have to tell your parents … that you’re a drug addict.”
Dipper’s head snapped up, his face a mix of fear and bravado. “How di- … I … I
don’t know what you’re talking about!”
“Yeah, you do,” Stan replied calmly, but with authority. “Trust me, I know
exactly what someone with an addiction looks like.” Stan glanced down to
Dipper’s arms. “I don’t see any needle marks, and besides I don’t think you’re
quite stupid enough for heroin, so I doubt that’s it. I’m guessing pills. What
is it? Fentanyl? Vicodin? Oxycontin?” A subtle widening of Dipper’s eyes and
tensing of his shoulder muscles told the elder Pines he had been correct with
the last guess. “There it is. So how many are you taking?”
Dipper realized there was no point in lying any longer: The old con man
obviously was able to see through him far easier than his parents could. He sat
heavily on his bed and silently stared at nothing for several moments. “Seven
or eight a day,” he finally confessed quietly, then he shifted his weight,
looking guilty. “Sometimes nine or ten,” he mumbled.
Stan tried to mask his concern. Dipper couldn’t have been much more than a
hundred pounds. For someone so small, such a high dose of painkillers would be
a difficult addiction to kick. He decided that action was required immediately.
“OK, this needs to end, and I know how to help you, kid. I’m giving you two
choices. You agree right now to trust me, and you do  exactly  what I say, and
we can fix this without anyone else knowing. Or, I go right downstairs and tell
your folks  tonight . Take your pick.”
Fear and panic broke out on Dipper’s face. “Grunkle Stan, please don’t … what
are you … why would you do this? Why would you help me to keep this from Mom
and Dad?”
The old man knelt down in front of Dipper. “Cause I made some big mistakes when
I was a kid, too, and I wish someone had helped me out before my old man found
out. I’m not saying your dad would kick you out, like your great-grandfather
did to me. But even though I don’t see my nephew often, I do know him well
enough to know … well, I know he'd overreact. Probably send you off to a rehab
school, away from home.”
“No!” Dipper gasped, aghast at the suggestion. “Mabel needs me! I … I  can’t
be taken away from her, you have to help me … I’ll do anything you want me to!
Please, just … just don’t tell Mom and Dad!”
Stan gave a stern stare to his great nephew. “I know you don’t want to be
separated from her, but  that  wasn’t hormones talking!” He gripped Dipper
firmly by the shoulders. “I see  your  problem, but what the hell is going on
with Mabel?” he demanded.
Dipper gulped, frantically trying to think of what lie he could come up with,
something to suitably explain Mabel’s behavior. Finally though, he realized he
had to be totally honest with  somebody . Stan had kept the secret of what had
happened at the end of the summer. It was Stan or nobody.
Putting his trust completely in his great uncle, Dipper opened up for the first
time about everything that had happened since the end of summer. His awful
mistake in his bedroom their first evening alone in the house. The close calls,
almost getting caught multiple times. Mabel’s fury and lashing out after
Dipper’s insistence that they stop things. Dipper’s cruel comments at the
hospital. Mabel’s depression and the ineffective medications she’d been
prescribed. How Dipper had gotten addicted to painkillers. Their reluctant
isolation from each other for months. He finished by telling him of Mabel’s
attempt to get his pills just two evenings before, and her threat to expose his
addiction if he told their parents. Stan had sat down beside Dipper on his bed
as he listened to the account in stunned silence. His great nephew and niece
were still just kids, only fourteen years old! The summer adventures they’d
experienced over a year ago had been bad enough, but this was entirely
something else! He was having difficulty imagining the stress they had been
under.
“I don’t know, kid,” Stan sighed. “Maybe you shouldn’t be trying to do this on
your own. Maybe you  should  come clean to your folks about the pills, and tell
them about how bad Mabel’s depression is at the same time. You both might be
able to use the help, after all.”
“And if I do that, you  know  the whole truth about Mabel and I will come out,
too!” Dipper replied pleadingly. “What’s a counsellor or shrink gonna do when
they figure out that this messed up brother and sister are also …  in love
with each other? When they know what we’ve done together! I could deny it, but
you know Mabel is terrible at lying! What then? You really think they’re  not
going to tell Mom and Dad? And we already know what  they  will do!”
Stan’s back had stiffened.  Son of a bitch, I’m such an idiot,  he thought to
himself. Now he realized how stupid the suggestion he’d just made to Dipper
really was. If any social worker or doctor found out about Dipper and Mabel
having had sex together, being separated by their parents would be the  least
of their concerns. In all likelihood, officials from Child Protection Services
would immediately pull the twins out of their home. Their parents would be
investigated for neglect, or worse. Mabel would be placed in protective
custody, and Dipper could even be criminally charged with sexual assault!
Stan couldn’t say any of this to Dipper: it would only heap more pressure onto
the young teenager. Dipper continued appealing to his great uncle. “Please,
Grunkle Stan! I'll stop the pills! Right now! Just … please don't tell Mom and
Dad!”
“Alright alright, we’ll try things out ourselves, first,” Stan relented, to
Dipper’s relief.
For the next several minutes, Stan explained how they would break Dipper’s
Oxycontin habit. Cold turkey wasn’t going to work: the withdrawal symptoms
would be too difficult to manage and would be too obvious to his parents. Stan
needed to get ahold of Methadone, and would make a call to Santiago the next
morning to purchase a supply as quickly as possible before his next pug run to
the border.
Stan ordered Dipper to hand over his supply of pills. Dipper paused, reluctant
for a moment, then slowly found and withdrew a paper bag from his suitcase.
Stan found the bottle inside, opened it and pulled out three pills, then passed
them over to Dipper while putting the bottle back in the bag and tucking it
into his pocket. “Take just one of these tonight,” said Stan. “Then take
another in the morning, and keep the third as a spare, only for if you really
get desperate and need it. I’ll try to be back before your folks get home from
whatever church they said they want to go to tomorrow morning. Then, say adios
to that nice little buzz you’re used to. Methadone helps ease the cravings, but
it won’t give you the high. And it doesn’t relieve pain. I’ll pick up some
Tylenol while I’m out, but I’m hoping that you’re actually over your headaches
by now. Well … guess we’ll find out tomorrow!” he added with a sigh.
Stan heard his name being called from downstairs. Rising to his feet and
crossing the floor, he opened the door and yelled, “Be right down!” then looked
briefly back to the anxious young teenager. “You can do this, kid! You’re
strong. The next few days will be the hardest, but I’ll help you get through
it. The worst will be over in a few days, so you should be mostly fine for
Christmas on Wednesday. But don’t kid yourself, you’ve got a long while ahead
of you when your body is still going to be screaming at you, making you want
those pills. Trust me … I know … You’d better be ready.” With a quick nod and a
small, supportive smile, Stan went down the stairs, leaving the door open
behind him.
Alone in the attic again, Dipper sat motionless in contemplation. He hadn’t
been expecting to be forced to face up to his addiction. He hadn’t even been
willing to admit to himself that he had a problem.  Am I really doing anything
wrong? I’m not hurting anybody , he rationalized to himself.  Sure, I knew I’d
be in trouble with Mom and Dad if they found out about the pills .  Just add it
to the list of things they don’t know about me!
But … what if Grunkle Stan is right, and I don’t need them anymore? I suppose I
really should try … Oh fuck!  he remembered with a start.  I’d damn well
better  try! Because if I fail at this, Stan said he’s gonna tell Mom and Dad
anyways. Then … if they send me to some rehab place … what will happen to
Mabel?!
Losing Mabel was  not  an option. Their lives may be miserable now, but he
couldn’t face the possibility of not having her near him.
She needs me! I need to be there for her! I’ve been awful these last couple of
months, letting myself float in the clouds made by the pills. I should have
been more supportive of her!  His thoughts paused, as he realized something
else.  And .. and I need her! I need her to be herself again! She’s my other
half … my  better  half! I just … love her so fucking much!
Dipper rubbed away the tears forming in his eyes as he lifted the flannel shirt
from the bed and picked up the thick book that had been concealed beneath it.
It was a book that he did not bring with him from California, but had left
hidden at the Shack after the last two summers. No one else knew about the
book: not his parents, not Grunkle Stan, not even Mabel.
He gazed solemnly at the heavy tome, and at the cross that was starkly
prominent on the cover. Above the cross were the words “Holy Bible”.
I thought I was finished with this,  he mused to himself as he opened the cover
and began leafing through to familiar pages.  I thought I didn’t want this
anymore. But … this is all too much! … I can't handle all of this without help!
Stan might be able to help me get off the pills, but what about helping Mabel?
Stan can't help her! I can, but ... I can't do it alone. I have to … I have to
…  believe!  I have to  know … that the help I need is right here in this book,
and all I have to do … is ask!
Dipper closed the cover, shut his eyes, and whispered for the strength to do
what he needed to do. He had been obsessed with getting his Oxy fix every day,
and had neglected Mabel for too long. He would kick the addiction for Mabel. He
would do  anything  for his sister!
Then he heard Mabel coming up the stairs to the attic. Swiftly, he knelt down
to the floor and pushed the thick volume underneath his bed.
===============================================================================
Mabel had not particularly wanted to go to the attic. It wasn’t just that she
didn’t want to shiver in the cold temperatures upstairs. She also didn’t want
to be surrounded by an environment that forced her to think of happier times.
And she didn’t want to have a conversation with Dipper.
But she asked to be excused and go upstairs because more than anything, she
just wanted to sleep.
I’m tired,  she said to herself as she climbed the stairs.  I’m so tired …
tired of everything. School. Chores. Church. Mama and Daddy. Even … Dipper.
Maybe even  especially  Dipper!
Mabel was mentally and physically exhausted, despite having dozed for much of
the car ride that day on the way up to Oregon. She thought back, for the
thousandth time, to the tense moments in Dipper’s room two evenings previous.
How the week had been so long and arduous, what with studying for and writing
exams she didn’t care about, and Christmas cheer blaring from every radio
station and storefront. She’d had enough. She just wanted it all to end, so
that she would be free of all the pain, heartache, and pressure.
I almost fooled Dipper into giving me those pills,  she remembered.  I don’t
know if I really would have gone through with taking them all, or not. But now,
I can’t … even if I want to! He’s going to have them hidden somewhere I can’t
get.
I just want to feel numb.
I want to feel … nothing!
As she reached the top of the stairs, she glanced in the old attic bedroom that
had come to mean so much to the twins over the last two summers. There he was,
straightening up from a crouching position beside his bed. He stopped and
glanced up towards her, and just in time Mabel averted her eyes.  Jeez, Dipper!
Why do you have to go and give a crap about me now, all of a sudden! Just let
me go! Forget about me ... Then I’ll know you won’t miss me … when I’m … gone.
Mabel avoided looking at her brother as she entered the room. He had put her
suitcase up onto her bed, where it was easy for her to reach and unpack.  Oh
Dipper, why’d you have to go and do that for me?  she thought guiltily.
Opening the suitcase, she found her nightgown in short order. From her
peripheral vision, she could see Dipper looking through his own bags as she
fished out her toothbrush and toothpaste, then she quickly headed back down the
stairs to the bathroom to change and get ready for bed. She needed to get out
of there before she could accidentally make eye contact with her twin.
On her return from the bathroom, dressed for bed, Dipper was still arranging
clothes and books from his bags, but her suitcase had been zipped closed and
placed nearby on the floor, and the covers of her bed were pulled back, ready
for her to get in.
Mabel closed her eyes, willing the wetness in her eyes to go away.  Don’t feel
it, Mabel,  she repeated over and over in her mind.  You’ll get to sleep
quickly if you just get into bed and close your eyes. Just don’t feel!
Wordlessly, Mabel climbed into her bed, pulling up the covers under her chin
against the cold air and turning to face the wall. Behind her, Dipper turned
down the lamp.
She squirmed in chilly discomfort as she gripped the thin blankets tightly,
wishing for her body heat to warm up the bed more quickly. As Dipper finished
arranging his books on the other side of the room, Mabel sighed in resignation
at the promise of a night that would be spent in the cold.
There was a rustling sound behind her back, followed by footsteps coming
towards her bed. Without a word, Dipper spread his own blanket on top of
Mabel’s. She heard a soft sniffle as the blanket was tucked gently around her
neck.
Don’t feel anything … Don’t … feel … anything ...
Behind her came careful noises of bedtime clothes and towels being gathered,
followed by sounds of gentle squeaking of the floorboards that moved away
towards the door. Then there was a moment of near silence: Mabel could hear
ragged breathing.
“I … I love you Mabel,” came Dipper’s quiet, unsteady voice, followed by swift
creaks of footsteps quickly padding down the wooden staircase.
Mabel’s pillow absorbed the wetness of her tears and the sounds of her
anguished sobs for several minutes, before she finally drifted off to sleep.
===============================================================================
The following morning, the twins’ parents were planning to attend Sunday
morning service. They would be gone for some time, as they would be driving to
Bend, Oregon, where the couple wanted to attend service at a large gospel
church located there. Bend was the only moderately-sized town in the region,
about an hour’s drive from Gravity Falls.
Dipper surprised his parents by asking to go with them. The twins had only
sporadically attended church with them since the second Sunday of September,
and they were happy to see that at least Dipper had shown a renewed interest in
sharing faith with them.
Mabel, on the other hand, was not interested. Dipper made a weak attempt to
convince her to come with them, but she meekly declined, preferring to stay in
her nightgown while the family ate breakfast. Stan told Mabel she could stay
and hang out with her old Grunkle in the Shack, and she glumly nodded in
agreement. She avoided eye contact with Dipper as the rest of the family got
ready to set out. Shortly afterward, the family car’s tires were crunching
through a light dusting of newly-fallen snow, as Dipper and his parents left
for the city.
The car was barely beyond the first corner in the driveway when Stan looked at
Mabel. “All right, kid! Get dressed, we’re going into town.”
Mabel looked to Stan in confusion. “You just said we’re hanging around here.”
“I lied. You should be used to that by now,” her great uncle replied swiftly.
“Get going, we have to make sure we’re back here long before your family
returns.”
===============================================================================
Winter had come early to central Oregon that year. It was already dark the
evening before when the Pines family had arrived in Gravity Falls, so now in
the daylight, Mabel was seeing the beauty of the snow-covered region for the
first time. Living in the San Francisco Bay area all her life, she rarely had
to deal with snow at all.
Mabel stood beside the Stanmobile and looked around as her great uncle swept
snow off the windows and the vast hood of the rusty old clunker. Having spent
two summers there, she knew the area around the Mystery Shack like the back of
her hand, but seeing the rustic A-frame tourist trap and the tall stands of
evergreen trees, all blanketed in a layer of fluffy whiteness, was a
breathtaking new experience. Closed for business until the start of the next
year’s tourist season, the Shack looked like a pristine artifact, as if it
belonged in a full-sized snow globe. Deep inside her, the voice of a playful,
exuberant goofball struggled to be heard, urging Mabel to dive headfirst into a
snowbank just for the sheer joy of being silly.
But that voice, as usual for her these days, was immediately drowned out. The
experience of depression had trained her to discourage herself from seeking out
happy feelings, because they were always followed by unhappiness that felt even
worse than before. She couldn’t know that the Prozac that she was prescribed
was not properly stimulating the production of serotonin and dopamine in her
brain, as it was designed to do. As a result, the other chemical regulating
effects were just reinforcing her negative emotions, effectively making her
depression worse.
As Stan drove them to town, Mabel’s eyes lost focus, no longer seeing the
beautiful winter scenery passing by. Her mind wandered to Dipper, and his
sudden change as of the previous night. She could tell he was trying to be the
caring, concerned, loving brother she always knew he was ...
Oh, poopcicles!  she thought.  Not again! Not now! I can’t think about Dipper,
about how wonderful he can be, about … no!  She willed herself to change the
subject in her mind. To something else, anything else! She swiped at her eyes
quickly to dry them, and attempted to re-focus on the passing trees.  I can’t
cry again! Not now, not in front of Grunkle Stan! Don’t feel anything, don’t
feel any- ...
“Want to tell me what’s on your mind, Pumpkin?” Stan asked carefully,
interrupting Mabel’s thoughts.
Mabel didn’t respond. Fighting down any reflex, she continued to stare out the
passenger-side window, her eyes resolutely following the up and down of the
cables connecting the utility poles at the side of the road as they passed by.
Stan tried to get through to her more directly. “Mabel, uh ...  Dipper and I
talked last night,” he said, in as gentle a voice as Mabel had ever heard. She
couldn’t help but turn and give a meek questioning look at her Grunkle. “Yeah …
I know what’s been going on. The two of you and your …” he cleared his throat
uncomfortably, “...  problems ... his addiction, your depression, and … about
Thursday evening, too. He told me everything.” Mabel dropped her eyes to her
lap and gripped her elbows across her stomach.
“Look, I’m sorry you’re both going through all this,” he pushed on, “but for
your sake, I don’t think stuffing it all inside helps. Know what I mean?”
“Yes ... it does,” Mabel replied tightly. Stan waited patiently for her to
continue. “I’ve tried letting it all out ... lots of times. When I do, it
doesn’t feel better. It just feels worse! I’m … I’m better off this way,” she
said while subtly rocking herself in the passenger seat.
Stan glanced worriedly at his great niece as he pulled the car over on the main
street of Gravity Falls. Mabel looked up and saw they were on the more run-down
end of downtown, parked across from the Skull Fracture. Stan told Mabel to sit
tight, then he got out and crossed the deserted Sunday-morning street, and
entered a side door at the rear of the notorious biker bar.
===============================================================================
Santiago was able to supply Stan with a sufficient supply of Methadone to carry
Dipper through the holidays, hopefully long enough to allow the teen to
completely quit on his own. Stan ground his teeth in irritation because of how
much he was forced to shell out for the medication: the low-level gangster had
seen how urgently Stan needed the pills on such short notice, and took full
advantage of the situation.  Not that I wouldn’t have done the same thing,  he
grumbled inwardly as he and Mabel returned to the Shack well ahead of the rest
of the family.
At least this should be able to do some good for the kid, though,  he sighed to
himself.  Mabel, on the other hand …  Stan cast a concerned glance at the girl
as she dropped limply onto the sofa, looking broken and defeated. His joints
creaked as he sat down beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulder,
pulling her comfortingly to himself. They sat in silence for a long moment.
“You want me to turn on the TV?” Stan asked, gesturing to the blank screen in
front of them. Mabel’s head slowly shook back and forth.  
Finally, Stan spoke up again. “Mabel … ah, I know this is hard, but have you
thought about … well, about moving on?”
He felt Mabel’s shoulder muscles tense. Mabel’s head remained facing forwards
towards the dormant television set. “What do you mean?” she replied weakly.
“You  know  what I mean,” Stan said, trying to be as gentle as possible.
“Dipper hinted that you’re not … you know, you’re not  together  together …
anymore.” Stan scratched the back of his neck in frustration. “Ugh! I’m just
saying, maybe you’ve gotta look at seeing what comes next. Start letting
yourself look for … for  who  comes next.” Mabel’s head whipped around, and she
leaned away from Stan as she looked up to his face in shock. Stan could see
that she obviously had never considered this, and it was an unwelcome
suggestion.
It crushed him, but Stan pressed on. “Come on,  think  about this, Sweetie!
This … this  thing  with Dipper … you’ve got to know that it can’t work! It
isn’t working now! And it’s  never  going to get easier. You’ve got to start
thinking about moving  forward!  Start thinking about the possibility that you
can move forward … with someone else, someday.”
Mabel’s face communicated the turmoil of emotions that were raging within her.
Stan could tell that there was so much she wanted to say, but couldn’t find the
words. Words of anger, frustration, sorrow, fear, longing, and desperation all
failed to form on her lips.
Finally, with eyes brimming, one sentence managed to escape.
“... But … Grunkle Stan … I … I  love  him …”
And Stan knew the discussion was over. A future without her brother was
inconceivable, a relationship with anyone else was utterly pointless to think
about. Mabel’s simple declaration of her feelings for Dipper was made with such
certainty and conviction, mixed with hopeless despair, that Stan knew she
simply could not feel any other way.
He pulled Mabel in for a tight hug. He briefly felt her squeeze him back, and
his own tears threatened to surface. Stan was frustrated with seeing his
favorite great niece this way. He had no easy answers for what pained her
heart, but what he knew of anti-depressants, it didn’t seem logical that they
had provided no improvement to her emotional state. He silently wondered if her
parents had looked into asking for a change to her medication.
For the time being, though, all he could do was provide assurance that he would
be there for her as best he could.
===============================================================================
The door to the backseat opened as soon as the car came to a stop outside the
Mystery Shack. Dipper’s parents were still commenting on the energetic worship
service they had just attended. Stepping out quickly, Dipper power-walked into
the Shack, silently desperate to see Stan before his parents could join him
inside.
He pushed the door open forcefully and immediately focused on the old man, who
was already moving towards him. “Grunkle Stan!” he said urgently, his eyes
wide, a sweaty hand rubbing his stomach. “Did you get the …” His words trailed
off as he looked around.
Stan immediately pulled Dipper back to his office. Once inside, he handed the
agitated teen a Methadone capsule and glass of water he had ready, and Dipper
quickly downed the pill. “How you holdin’ up, kid?” asked Stan, placing his
hand on Dipper’s shoulder.
Dipper unconsciously wiped his nose across the sleeve of his shirt. “I feel
like I wanna puke,” he confessed.
Stan grunted in confirmation. “Sounds about right. That pill should kick in
quickly, and you’ll start feeling a bit better in about fifteen minutes. What
about pain? Did your headaches come back?”
“A little bit. It’s not all that bad,” Dipper said, accepting the Tylenol that
Stan offered. He yawned then finished the glass of water in one long drink.
Stan nodded as he heard the twins’ parents come in through the door. “Maybe
you’d better make yourself scarce for the time being,” he said under his
breath.
“Yeah,” Dipper whispered back, forcing himself to smile. “Thanks, Grunkle
Stan.” He loudly announced to his mother and father that he felt a bit car sick
and wanted to lay down, then swiftly climbed the stairs to the attic.
As he entered the chilly bedroom, he immediately noticed that he wasn’t alone.
Mabel was already there, sitting on her bed, bundled up in two layers of
sweaters and thick fuzzy pants. Her knees were under her chin, her arms
securely wrapped around her shins.
“Uh … hi,” Dipper muttered, anxiously sliding his palm over his perspiring
forehead and making his way towards the bed on his side of the room.
Mabel glanced over to watch as Dipper gingerly sat down on the edge of the bed,
paused, then swung his legs up and groaned as he laid down on his back. Mere
seconds later, he was slowly sitting back up again, scratching his scalp with
one hand and holding his abdomen with his other arm.
“You okay?” Mabel asked softly.
Dipper forced his hands to stop moving. Without realizing it, one leg
immediately started bouncing. “Yeah I’m fine!” he replied, not looking at
Mabel. “I just … the car ride back from church … I just started feeling a
little sick, and -”
“It’s all right, Dipper. I know,” Mabel interrupted, a sombre list to her
voice. “Grunkle Stan told me about how he’s helping you get off your pills.”
Her brother’s eyes widened and he took a sharp breath. “Don’t worry.” She
turned away and curled up on her side as she continued, “I’m not going to tell
on you to Mama and Daddy.”
Dipper started breathing again, the cold temperature, adrenaline, and
withdrawal agitation now combining to cause his body to visibly tremble. He
forced himself to take deep, slow breaths, trying to calm himself down. Within
a few minutes, he was in control of himself.
Control. There’s that word again, he thought to himself, remembering back to
September when he had willingly given himself over, and let happen what he
thought God wanted to happen. Am I in control, or not? Have I calmed myself
down, or is it just the Methadone kicking in? Do I believe, or not?
Across the room, Mabel hadn’t moved. The rest of family was downstairs,
preparing for a late lunch. He stared at Mabel’s back. Seeing her in pain was
just as painful for him. Every fiber of his being screamed at him to do
something!
Dipper’s faith in the words of the book hidden beneath his bed wavered once
again. He swallowed, steeling himself.  I don’t have time to wait for whatever
help He might provide! Right now, I need to do something, say something.
Anything!
“Mabel?” he said tentatively, waiting for a response. He received none.
He pushed on. “Mabel, can we … can we please talk about … what happened the
other night back home?”
Mabel’s back remained towards her brother. “What’s there to talk about?” she
replied softly.
Dipper sighed heavily. “I don’t know,” Dipper moaned, gripping a handful of
hair from the back of his head. “You … you really scared me.”
Across the room, there was no response from Mabel. Dipper lowered his gaze to
the rough plank floor between their beds. “I never thought you could ever think
about stuff like that,” he said. “Like, you … hurting yourself …” His voice
trailed off, unable to coherently express his feelings into words. “I just want
to help you,” he mumbled, his voice cracking, “I … I don't know what I'd do
without you.”
Dipper lifted his head, hoping for some sign that any of his words were
helping. His sister remained motionless.
I don't know anything else to say, except …  “Mabel … I lo-”
“ Don't! ” Mabel shot back, her tone filled with anguish. “Just  stop!  Just …”
Her voice dropped to a whisper as she rolled onto her back. Her watering eyes
were directed up to the attic's rafters. “... Please … I can’t … please just
stop .”
Dipper felt his chest constrict in pain. He watched, helpless and immobile, as
Mabel balled her hands to her eyes, biting her lower lip as now she took her
turn to struggle with regaining self control. After a moment to compose
herself, she breathed, “I’m sorry, Dipper ... I just can’t do this now.”
A moment later she resolutely stood, jaw clenched. Without another word or look
at her brother, Mabel made her way out the door and down the stairs.
Alone in the attic, Dipper struggled to keep himself from slipping into
despair. He rolled over and reached under his bed, grabbing the thick black
book. Pushing aside the nausea, he immediately opened it to where he had
bookmarked it before he put it away the previous night, and started reading
again.
===============================================================================
Immediately after Dipper had dashed up the stairs, Stan joined the twins’
parents in the kitchen. They asked what he and Mabel did all morning, and he
smoothly spun a story of the two of them killing time by taking a short drive,
just to see the town covered in snow. It was partly true, and there was no
reason for Stan to not be believed.
Stan did suggest that he thought that Mabel seemed to be abnormally down in the
dumps, especially for being on antidepressants. The parents agreed, lamenting
that they missed the Mabel they used to know, and how they thought they were
doing what was best for her with the medications. Stan asked them if they had
taken Mabel back to her doctor, to check to see if she was responding as should
be expected. Her parents guiltily admitted that they had not: they were trying
to get back on track with their respective careers after Dipper's
hospitalization, and both had put their work ahead of their children since
Dipper had come home. They agreed they needed to address the matter as soon as
they returned to California after the holidays were over.
The conversation turned to the cause of Mabel’s troubles. Her father noted
again that everything seemed to turn for the worse shortly after the twins
started high school. He had never managed to figure out what had happened when
Mabel’s anger exploded towards Dipper before his hospitalization, nor why she
had been so down all the time since before he came home. Her mother wondered if
they should perhaps finally stop walking on eggshells around her and get to the
bottom of this. Not immediately, of course. But she proposed that the long car
ride home would be an excellent uninterrupted time to prod Mabel until she
confessed what was wrong. Her husband thought that was a good idea, and that
Dipper had much to account for as well.
Stan knew that cornering the kids and forcing them to talk about everything
that caused their problems would be a disaster. Before he could think of any
way to change their minds, a sullen Mabel emerged from the attic, and her
parents whisked her to the table to get some food. Chucking a thumb towards the
ceiling, Stan said he’d go up to see if Dipper felt like eating anything for
lunch. As he backed out of the kitchen, he knew he had less than two weeks to
intervene somehow before the family started their return trip.
Climbing halfway up the stairs and poking his head up to the landing, Stan
looked in the bedroom and could see Dipper on his bed laying on his side, a
thick book open in front of him.
“Hey, kid!” he called, causing Dipper’s head to snap towards him. “Want to get
something to eat?”
“Uh … not right now,” Dipper replied evasively. “Just give me a few minutes
more, and I’ll be okay.” He lowered his voice imperceptibly. “I think it’s
kicking in.”
Stan nodded. “Good to hear,” he said, then in a louder voice, “As soon as
you’re up to it, drag your sorry carcass down here. Got it, kid?” He gave
Dipper a wiley smile.
A grin spread on Dipper’s face. “I got it, Grunkle Stan,” he replied loudly.
As his great uncle went back downstairs, Dipper’s smile disappeared, and he
resumed his reading.
===============================================================================
The next couple of days went by somewhat unpleasantly, as far as the twins’
mother and father were concerned. This was despite their best efforts to cheer
up their children by giving them time with some summertime friends.
On Monday, Wendy stopped by to visit, showing off the fact she had finally got
her driver's licence. The twins’ parents had heard from Mabel long ago about
Dipper’s infatuation with the tall redhead, and looked forward to seeing him
being all awkward around her. Ultimately they were disappointed to see that
their son was completely unphased by Wendy’s appearance.
Wendy, of course, was cool with any situation, and decided to tell a couple of
stories to the twins’ parents of how great their children were, and how much
fun they'd had together over the last two summers. She recounted with
enthusiasm how Dipper had discovered a secret bunker beneath a tree out in the
woods, and how the three of them and Soos had explored it. She was just
starting to describe the harrowing security room that almost crushed them all,
but noticed the twins’ folks were wide-eyed, and Dipper giving her very small
and rapid shakes of his head. Quickly reading the situation, Wendy deftly side-
stepped any more dangerous or supernatural details, realizing the twins hadn't
told their parents everything that had happened over that crazy first summer.
She was also not oblivious to the changes she saw in the kids. The last time
Wendy had seen the twins was the day before they left for California on the
last weekend of summer. They had seemed incredibly alive and happy, almost
giddy, that whole final week following their “birthday bash” weekend in
Portland. Now her little buds looked like they had the weight of the world on
their shoulders. Dipper looked distracted or agitated, as if he were
concentrating on some other subject in his mind. And Mabel was slouched and
unenergetic, the opposite of what Wendy had ever experienced from her. Wendy’s
visit ended awkwardly, amid clumsy Christmas well wishes and fumbled goodbyes.
The following day was Christmas Eve, and the family left Stan at the Shack to
travel into town for last-minute shopping, as well as a visit to Soos. The
twins’ parents wanted to thank him and his grandmother for taking the twins in
when Stan had briefly lost ownership of his home. The lovable handyman was
delighted to see his favorite dudes again, and happily introduced himself to
Dipper and Mabel’s parents, giving them each a big hug. After also meeting his
Abeulita and his girlfriend Melody, who was on vacation from the city, the
visit went much like Wendy’s the day before, with the twins being polite but
decidedly not themselves. Finally their father determined it was time to head
back when Mabel’s lack of enthusiasm and Dipper’s increased fidgeting was
becoming a distraction.
“You know, kids, this is starting to wear a bit thin,” said their father from
the driver’s seat, sternly addressing the twins through the rear-view mirror as
they drove the short route back towards the Shack. “I’m getting pretty tired of
this anti-social act you two have going on. It’s not like either of you at
all.”
They half looked up as their mother shot a warning look to her husband.
“Darling ....” she said quietly. “Not now. Tomorrow is Christmas Day, for
goodness sake! It can wait.”
Their father glanced back at his wife, his face set. Then he fired another look
at the twins in the mirror and muttered “Alright, fine,” and returned his
attention to the road.
In the backseat, the two teenagers realized that they had temporarily dodged a
major bullet. They hadn’t been themselves in months, but now they were finally
going to be called out for their behavior. Their father still wanted to get to
the bottom of whatever issues were bothering them, and their mother was
apparently in agreement. Soon, very soon, they would have to explain
themselves. Dipper felt bile rise in his throat, and his leg began bouncing
faster as he shakily looked over to Mabel, who had slouched even lower in her
seat and turned her head toward her window. Mabel struggled to muster the
fortitude to deal with the situation, while Dipper was loathe to face Mabel’s
rejection again while still battling withdrawal symptoms. But both knew they
had to do something, and had to try getting over being paralyzed by their
fears.
===============================================================================
There were no complaints on Christmas Day. The Pines family spent the day
together, enjoying a quiet, peaceful day of unwrapping gifts, eating good food,
playing family games, and taking a stroll together in freshly fallen snow. In
the evening, the twins’ father retrieved his guitar and led the family in
Christmas music. Even Stan joined in on some classic carols as everyone sat and
sang around the warm fireplace.
Dipper and Mabel went to bed that evening with a feeling of subdued
contentment. For all the turmoil in their lives, the day had been as perfect as
could be expected. Dipper took his evening dose of Methadone, continuing his
effort to break his addiction. As they bundled themselves under their covers in
their beds and Dipper prepared to turn off the lamp, Mabel’s eyes locked with
Dipper. For several seconds they stared at one another, Mabel biting her lip,
and Dipper blinking uncertainly. Finally, Mabel gave her brother a quick nod,
and the edges of Dipper’s mouth turned up slightly. Her eyes closed as Dipper
flipped the light switch.
It was a start. Dipper and Mabel knew they were still a team, and they’d get
through this. They’d find time in the next couple of days up in their bedroom
to quietly work out how to handle their parents. And maybe more than that
afterward. They fell asleep feeling positive about something for the first time
in a long while.
===============================================================================
“Pumpkin! Come on, wakey wakey!”
“Up and at ‘em, Dip! Come on, let’s go!”
Mabel and Dipper both groaned sleepily, opening bleary eyes to see their
parents leaning over them, gently shaking them awake. Dipper’s clock showed
that it was just after six in the morning. “What’s going on?” he mumbled as his
father stepped back.
“Yeah!” whined Mabel groggily.
Their mother straightened up from where she had been hovering over Mabel, and
joined her husband standing between the beds. “We didn’t want to spoil such a
wonderful day yesterday by telling you that …” She cast an annoyed look at her
husband, “... that we have to go back home.”
Dipper was instantly wide awake. “What?”
“We leave this morning,” she said sympathetically as she looked from one twin
to the other. “We need to pack up and get on the road as soon as we can so we
can get home tonight.”
Mabel practically shrivelled. “Now?” she asked weakly.
It was their father’s turn to speak. “I’m sorry, but I got a text from my boss
on Monday. Our biggest client needs the new version of our product to ship
before the end of the calendar year. It’s all hands on deck, all vacation time
after Christmas was cancelled. They  wanted  me there  today ! As it is, I’m
required to be at my desk tomorrow morning, and I probably won’t get back to
the house until it’s done.” He held out his hands. “I’ve got no choice. We have
to go.”
“I’m glad we didn’t tell you, because we had such a beautiful Christmas Day,”
their mother continued. “But it means we’ve got to get going now. So … we’re
very sorry, but … chop chop! On your feet, mateys!” she cried, attempting
enthusiasm.
Dipper could feel himself starting to hyperventilate, but struggled to contain
his panic. “But … but what abou-”
“No ‘buts’,” interrupted his father. “This isn’t up for debate, and the clock
is ticking. We have too much packing and a lot of driving to do today. Get up,
now!” he said, his tone becoming more authoritarian as he looked at his
children’s crestfallen faces. “I’m sorry kids, but there is  nothing  else we
can do.”
Another voice spoke up. “Maybe there is.”
Everyone turned to the attic bedroom door. Standing in his bathrobe and
slippers, an over-tired Stan held himself up with one hand on the door frame.
“Kid,” he said, addressing his adult nephew, “just … let ‘em stay here for the
rest of the holidays!”
Mabel sniffed hopefully. “Really?” she asked.
“Oh, Stanley,” the twins’ mother said. “That’s very generous of you, but-”
“Yeah, it is,” Stan deadpanned. “I surprise myself sometimes with how  generous
I am.”
Dipper piped up. “ I’d  be okay with staying!”
“Uncle Stan,” their father replied quickly, “you’ve taken them in enough times
already. We can’t ask you to-”
“Fine! Then  I’ll  ask  you! ” Stan shot back. “Can you  please  leave the kids
here, while you two go home? Maybe then you can all stop yapping, you two can
finish packing your stuff, and I can go back to bed until you’re ready to go!
All right?”
Dipper and Mabel didn’t have to act. Their faces bore the most desperate,
pleading expressions possible as their parents turned to look at them for
confirmation.
===============================================================================
Two hours later, the Pines family car was moving out the driveway of the
Mystery Shack. Stan watched it go from the front porch, flanked on either side
by a young teenager. Soon the sound of the car faded completely, and an
uncomfortable silence fell on the three.
“OK, kids,” Stan finally grunted. “You got lucky, and now’s your chance. You’ve
got a little more than a week. Work it out yourself if you want. Or if you need
me to help, that works too. You’re brother and sister, and you’ve got to figure
out if that’s all you are. But whatever happens, you’d better figure it out
for sure  this time before you get on the bus a week from Saturday.”
Stan turned around and headed in the door. “It’s cold out, I’m going inside.
Let me know if you need me.”
He closed the door, leaving Dipper and Mabel alone standing on the top step,
looking uncertainly at each other.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 11 *****
===============================================================================
Stan was just settling into his favorite armchair, his head turning towards the
front door as it opened. Dipper and Mabel slowly came in off the front porch
from the cold air outside. They had remained outdoors for only a moment after
his strategic retreat. He directed a pointed look at them.
There was a short pause. “We’re-” Dipper began, glancing with cautious optimism
at his twin, “We’re going to the attic. We’re going to try to talk about this …
right, Mabel?”
Mabel turned her head to Dipper and nodded. Though her face was expressionless,
Stan noticed that she responded quickly and made eye contact with her brother.
“Hey kid,” Stan called to Dipper. “You should have a dose of your Methadone
first. Stay here for a minute while I get it.” He struggled out of his chair
and waved to Mabel. “Go on up, Pumpkin,” he told her with a grin. “Maybe I’ll
coat his meds in that … what’s it called … Smile Dip stuff? Think that’ll help
him?” He saw a twinkle in Mabel’s eyes, mirroring Dipper’s hopeful expression.
He thought he could detect a hint of a smile as she glanced at Dipper, then she
turned and went up the staircase.
After returning to the living room with a pill and a glass of water, Stan eyed
Dipper as the medication was quickly downed. “How’re you feeling, kid?” he
asked.
“Better, thanks,” Dipper replied, his gaze locked on the stairs.
“Hey!” Stan said sharply, snapping his fingers in front of Dipper’s face.
Startled, the teen focused on his great uncle. “Whatever you think you want to
happen, just .. be careful, okay? You’ve both been through a lot, and all that
crap doesn’t just go away because your parents aren’t here right now,” he
explained, hoping he was appearing supportive and understanding.
Dipper nodded. “I got it, Grunkle Stan.” Stan squeezed his nephew’s shoulder,
then watched as Dipper trotted to the attic stairs and climbed them quickly.
The old man shook his head sadly. The twins were in an unimaginably difficult
position for two young teenagers. He hoped they would both realize that it
would be better for them to let go of their forbidden affair, and the sooner,
the better. But there was no point in beating them over the head with his
opinion on that: they already knew his feelings on the matter of their
relationship. He sunk back into the chair and rested the side of his head in
his palm, frustrated at his inability to really help them.
===============================================================================
“So … “ Dipper asked slowly, his shoulders rigid and hands in his pockets. He
waited awkwardly, leaning back against the closed door to their attic bedroom.
“Wh- … what happens now?”.
Mabel twisted a handful of her hair as she sat on the edge of her bed. Then she
looked up, a conflicted mixture of anxiety and hope in her expression.. “You
could … come sit beside me?”
Dipper crossed the floor and stopped a few feet away from Mabel.  How do I
handle this?  he thought, wondering what the best way would be to navigate
between the eggshells of their relationship. He decided to perch himself a
discreet distance from Mabel with his hands clasped in his lap, his uncertainty
of how to proceed still apparent.
After a long moment, Mabel gently placed the back of her hand on the bedspread
between herself and Dipper. Glancing up to see a brave, tiny smile on Mabel’s
face. Dipper gulped and lightly placed his sweating palm in hers.
Instantly, both twins experienced a surge of hormones at the touch, the first
affectionate contact between them in months. Their fingers carefully locked
together, then gripped tightly. Dipper drew a shaky lungful of air. “I’ve …
really  missed you,” he confessed quietly.
Mabel could not prevent the sudden hitch in her breathing. “I … miss you … too
…” she whispered between quiet gasps.
Dipper’s insides ached to see the moisture building up in his sister’s eyes,
the quivering of her lip. He immediately reached across to cup the side of her
face, his thumb intercepting the first salty trickle that rolled down her
cheek. His vision blurred from his own tears that fought to escape his eyes.
Slowly the twins leaned towards one another, their hands still joined between
them, both of them struggling to not buckle under the tremendous weight of the
moment. Then their lips brushed against each other, and they were unable to
hold it back any longer. Mabel began keening, lightly at first, then harder as
she lost all control. Dipper’s cries were no less intense. Pulling themselves
closely into one another, they crushed the sides of their heads together and
wept unabashedly, their bodies shaking from the sobs that wracked their chests.
Neither of them had any idea how many minutes passed as they held one another.
They had spent over three months living physically close but divided by a
cavernous distance. That chasm was the opposite of this brief but complete
intimacy, and the literal lifetime of mutual comfort and support they had
shared before. There was no hurry for the healing moment to end. As the sobs
and cries faded to sniffles and hiccups, and finally to deep sighs of relief,
Dipper and Mabel simply clutched each other securely, feeling as though they
might never let go.
“I love you, Dipper,” Mabel murmured into his ear.
Dipper squeezed harder for a moment. “I love you too,” he whispered back with
sincerity. He relaxed his hold and caressed his lips on Mabel’s neck. She
gasped softly as Dipper backed off slowly and gently placed small kisses on her
cheek and jaw. Soon his mouth reached hers, and this time when their lips
touched, they hungrily forced them together.
Repressed desires boiled to the surface. Mabel pushed Dipper down to the bed as
the feverish passion of their kisses continued to escalate. Fingers ran firmly
through hair and over clothed arms and backs while they made noises of loving
affection and growing arousal.
Mabel’s head inched back, her trademark huge smile plastered on her face as her
lips parted from Dipper’s. “Holy guacamole dip, Dip!” she panted, gazing down
into her brother’s eyes. “That was amazing!”
It had been far too long since Dipper had heard a silly turn of phrase from his
sister, to witness happiness and joy in her again. He completely failed to
suppress an outburst of relieved laughter. Mabel gave him a mock-angry stare
for a second, then smirked and lightly smothered his sheepish grin.
After several more short kisses, Mabel sighed in satisfaction and relaxed
completely atop Dipper, allowing him to hold her in a loose, comforting
embrace.
“I think we  really  needed this,” Dipper mumbled contentedly into Mabel’s neck
while lightly stroking her hair and back.
Mabel nodded. “Yup-pers!” she replied quietly. “ Total  agreement with you
there, Broseph.” She took a deep breath and let it all back out. “This feels
too good to have held back for so long!”
Dipper nodded back lightly. “Yeah. It was pretty lucky for us that Mom and Dad
went home without us this morning.” He tenderly kissed Mabel’s neck, eliciting
a soft hum from his twin. “I don’t want to  think  about how bad that return
trip would have been today if Stan hadn’t let us stay.”
“It would have been  awful! ” Mabel agreed, considering in her head how the
long trip in the family’s minivan would likely have gone. “We were  not  ready
for the great ‘Van’ish Inquisition. The ‘Stan’ish Inquisition is a way better
option!” Dipper chuckled as she lifted and turned her head back to look down on
him, their noses rubbing together. “But now we’ll be ready by the end of next
week.”
Dipper tried to banish his feelings of concern that immediately flooded over
him. “I hope so,” he replied, averting his eyes.
“Hey!” Mabel scolded him playfully. “You just said you didn’t want to think
about it. So stop your thinkin’! We’ve got more than a whole week before we go
back, so we’ve got  plenty  of time!” A gentle kiss landed on Dipper’s lips.
“Things are going to be  so  different when we get back to Piedmont.”
“Yeah, I know,” said Dipper morosely.
A questioning look crossed Mabel’s face. “Yeah you know …  what , Dip? … I
don’t get it.”
“Going back home, after having this week,” Dipper replied, still not looking
directly at Mabel. “It’s just gonna be rough. You know, when … when we have to
go back to the way things were.”
Mabel’s questioning expression froze. Moments passed before Dipper brought
himself back and realized his twin had fallen silent. He tried to read her
face.
“The way … things  were? ” Mabel repeated slowly, her face inscrutable.
An alarm began to sound in Dipper’s brain. His sister was normally an emotional
open book. It was fairly simple for complete strangers to know her moods, and
ordinarily it was child’s play for him since he knew her so well. But at that
moment, Mabel was blank.
“Well … yeah,” Dipper said with caution. “I mean … it’s  great  that we have
this time here … but when we get home …” Dipper’s voice trailed off as he saw
the worry growing in Mabel’s features.
“Wait,” Mabel said, pushing herself up and sitting astride Dipper. “... aren’t
we …  changing  things here?” she asked carefully. “I thought  this -” she
waved forward and backward, indicating their closeness together, “-meant that
all the poop we’ve been through is  over  ... doesn’t it?”
“Absolutely! There’s no poop, this is a poop-free zone, Mabel!” Dipper agreed,
forcing a smile and trying to bring some levity back to their talk.
It didn’t work. Mabel quickly glanced around the attic of the Shack. “ This  is
a poop-free zone, you’re saying,” she repeated in a neutral tone. She closed
her eyes and took a deep breath, then her focus returned to Dipper. “What
exactly  do you think we’re doing here, Dipper?”
“Uh … um ...” Dipper stammered, “... m- making up with each other?”
Mabel struggled to stay positive. “Okay, I’d like that ... I  want  us to make
up, but-”
“I want that too!” Dipper interrupted her urgently, reaching up quickly to palm
Mabel’s face in his hands. “And we can! All the time we’ve wanted to spend
together, all the things we’ve wanted to, you know ...  do  together … we have
the chance now! There’s nothing to stop us here!”
“But … you can’t want to make up if you … if you don’t want to  stay  made up,”
she replied, fumbling for the right words. “And that means that we stay made up
when we go back down to California.” Mabel took Dipper’s hands from her face
and squeezed them while staring down into his eyes, hoping she didn’t hear the
response she feared. “Right?”
Dipper squeezed Mabel’s hands in return, wanting very much for her to not be
unreasonable. “Mabes … when we get back home, you know we … we  can’t  do any
of this stuff there!”
“Oh for …” Mabel cried out in frustration, yanking her hands free and climbing
off of Dipper as fast as she could. She stood and turned to face the bed as
Dipper scrambled to sit up. “I don’t believe this! You’re already planning on
breaking up  with me!  Again! ”
“Mabel, I would  never  break up with you!” Dipper exclaimed, trying to stand
up off the bed.
She leaned in aggressively, forcing Dipper back down. “You  already have  once
before! Doesn’t any of this sound familiar to you? How could you forget what
you did that night?”
Dipper spread his hands “ Of course  I remember that night!” he shot back
defensively. “It was the same night that Mom and Dad came home early and came
this  close to catching us naked together in your room! You think that was
okay? ”
“Don’t be stupid!” fired back Mabel. “We  didn’t  get caught, but you  still
decided to tell me we couldn’t be together anymore!  You  decided we wouldn’t
be  anything  to each other anymore! How was that  not  breaking up with me?”
“I never … I mean ... “ Dipper sputtered desperately, “... I never meant for
you to feel that I didn’t  want  to be with you, or that you would feel like I
broke up  with you! Mabel …” He took a deep breath, “… I  love  you!”
Mabel blew air through her lips derisively. “Yeah, right! You got a heck of a
way of  showing  it!” she grunted as she folded her arms over her chest. “How
can you say you love me when you don't want to experience what it’s all about?”
“I don't want to  experience  it?” Dipper argued, sounding hurt. “I thought …
Mabel, I thought there was more to us than just …  physical  stuff. Is that the
only thing you miss about our relationship? Kissing? And … and sex?”
“Of course not!” Mabel cried, taking several backwards steps. “You don’t  get
it! Love means  being there  for each other, in every way we need each other!
Sometimes … okay yeah, sometimes that means we do the physical stuff, but …
that’s only  part  of it! We need to be able to talk, and feel … and support,
and … and  confide  … and  protect , and …  AUUUGGGH! ” She buried her face in
her hands.
Dipper slouched meekly. “I’m sorry, but I don’t understand, Mabel. I’ve … I’ve
always  been there for you!” he said softly.
Mabel gripped her elbows, holding herself tightly. “Not since September, you
haven’t!” she cried. “Ever since that night you got trapped under the bed,
you’ve been too scared to do anything with me  at all!  We’re like strangers
under the same roof!”
“I never-” Dipper began, then stopped and thought for a moment, remembering his
own hurt feelings and desire for isolation he’d felt since everything blew up
between them. “Okay … I see what you’re saying … and I’m sorry. I can … I can
do better! I can figure out how to go back to being a really good brother-”
“I need you to be  more  than my brother, Dipper!” Mabel exclaimed miserably.
“A lover isn’t just a brother! I  need  more than that from you now! Just being
my brother …” She hung her head as her voice trailed off.
For a long, uncomfortable moment, neither twin said anything. Dipper slowly
stood and stepped close to Mabel, putting a gentle hand on her shoulder.
“Mabel, please believe me when I tell you that I  do  love you. More than I
ever have! And I’m here, right now, telling you that no matter where we are,
I’m always going to feel that way!”
He paused awkwardly as his sister’s eyes remained on the floor. “But … when we
aren’t in a safe place, if doing something or saying the wrong thing could
really mess things up for us … I don’t like it, but I  have  to bury how I
really feel! And so do you! It’s just too much of a risk!”
Mabel twisted out from under Dipper’s hand, turning her back and marching off
to the other side of the room. Dipper kept after her. “C’mon Mabel! We  talked
about this with Grunkle Stan at the end of the summer! If we don’t stop, we’ll
get caught, and then there’s no telling what Mom and Dad might do! We  have  to
make it look like we’re just a normal brother and sister when we’re at home!”
“ I can’t do that! ” screeched Mabel as she spun around to face Dipper. “Maybe
you haven’t been paying attention, but I haven’t been doin’ so hot since summer
ended!” Her composure continued to crumble. “I knew the  first morning  I
couldn’t do it! I was only  acting  like I was okay! And I couldn’t leave it
alone when Daddy and Mama went out to their Bible study! And then everything …
just went  kablooey , and then ...“ She sobbed violently and stamped one foot
hard. “ It’s only been four months, Dipper! How are we supposed to keep going
like this for four more YEARS?!? Or LONGER?! ”
Dipper looked pleadingly at Mabel. “I’ll  help  you, Mabel. We’ve … somehow
we’ve  got  to get through this!”
“It’s too hard!” she said miserably. “This is  torture , to be so close to you,
but not able to  reach  you … to know that we had so much, and it’s  gone , but
also it’s  not , and you’re … you're  right there EVERY SINGLE DAY  …” Mabel
balled her fists at her sides. “Maybe  you  can do this, but  I can’t! ”
“Yes, you can!” Dipper replied loudly, starting to lose patience with his
sister, thinking that she wasn’t really making her best effort to get past
this. Irritation seeped into his voice. “Mabel please, you have to try!”
“ I HAVE tried!! ” Mabel almost screamed back. “I can’t  stand  it! And if you
can, well … maybe I’m not as strong as you are! Or …” her tone turned pitiful,
“or maybe you just don’t feel the same way about me as I do about you!”
Darkness flashed across Dipper’s face. “ Seriously , Mabel?” he fumed. “You
don’t know  what  I’m feeling inside! I did what I had to do to  protect  us,
so that I didn’t lose you  for real , and …” He tried and failed to suppress a
roar of exasperation, grabbing two fistfuls of his thick hair and pulling hard
in frustration as he paced to the opposite side of the room.
The instant the next thought popped into his head, he knew he shouldn’t say it
aloud. But his adolescent anger got the better of him. “I got the  shit  kicked
out of me over what happened between us! If anyone’s suffered because of all
this, it’s  me!  Do you ever consider that?” He bowed his head and turned his
back. “If you don’t think I love you, maybe you should just … find yourself
another boyfriend,” he growled bitterly.
Silence was the only reply he got, and he reluctantly turned around. Mabel’s
face was a mask of horrified disgust. Several heartbeats went by, her mouth
opening and closing, her entire body quivering in fear and rage. Finally she
found her voice. “How could you  say  that?” she squeaked. “How could you even
think  that about me?”
“ You  kinda said the same thing,” Dipper grumbled, a part of his stubborn
nature refusing to back down.
“ What?! ” Mabel shot back, almost hysterical. “You think that what  I  said
was even  close  to-” Her mouth snapped shut, fury burning in her eyes. “You
know what?  Forget it!  Just forget it! I’m  done! ” She stormed past an
immobile Dipper towards the attic door. After throwing it open and stepping
over the threshold, she stopped short and turned back, marching towards
Dipper’s side of the room
Dipper sighed with resignation. “You’re done with  what , Mabel?”
His sister ignored him, going straight to Dipper’s suitcase and proceeded to
begin rifling through his things. He made no effort to stop her. “What’re you
looking for?” he asked sullenly, again receiving no response.
Finally she grabbed the suitcase and flipped it upside down, spilling the
contents across the floor. She glared at Dipper dangerously, her voice dripping
with venom. “Where’s the Oxy? Where are your pills?”
All traces of Dipper’s selfish demeanour immediately disappeared, along with
all the color from his face. “Mabel, just wait a min-”
“ Where ARE they!? ” she demanded hotly.
“I don’t  have  them!” he hissed, trying to keep his voice down even as he felt
panic boiling up inside him. “I gave them all to Stan!”
“ BULLSHIT!! ” she fired back, shocking Dipper further with her extremely rare
use of profanity. “You must have kept some back from him, hid them somewhere
else! I want them  NOW! ”
“I don’t have any, I  swear! ” Dipper pleaded, thankful he was being truthful.
He was frantically trying to think of how to defuse this increasingly out-of-
control situation.
Mabel coldly sized up the sincerity in her brother’s expression. “ Fine! ” she
barked, and directed her attention up to the exposed rafters and beams above
them in the attic. “That’s  plenty  high! I’ll just go find a rope, loop it
around one of those things, tie one end around my neck, and that’ll be that!
Now get  out  of my way!” She again strode purposefully towards the door.
Dipper caught her by the elbow. “Mabel!  Please! ” he begged, as she tugged her
arm impatiently. “Just … you’ve just got to  stop  for a second!” he exclaimed,
trying to readjust his hold with both hands. With a determined grunt and a
strong twist of her arm, Mabel broke his grip and bolted for the door.
“Mabel NO!” Dipper yelled, lunging after her in a desperate attempt to tackle
her. But he only managed to grab the shoulder of her sweater, and she stayed on
her feet.
“Let  go! ” Mabel snarled as she reached to wrench his hand away. Dipper
managed to close his grip tightly on her wrist, spinning Mabel around to face
him.
I just need her to stop and calm down. She has to listen to me , he thought.
“Mabel …” he implored through gritted teeth, trying to snare her other arm as
she violently twisted her body, attempting to free herself.
Before he could get hold, Mabel swung her free arm around to hit Dipper, the
flat of her hand landing solidly on his bicep. “ Let GO! ” she repeated louder,
thrashing wildly. Again, Dipper could not block Mabel’s swing, a second strike
catching him painfully on his shoulder.
Having no intention of hitting back, Dipper quickly determined he had to force
Mabel to the floor, where he hoped he might be able to safely restrain her. He
grunted with effort as he shifted all his weight to his opposite leg to knock
them both off balance, and pulled down on her one wrist as hard as he could.
The move worked, and in a second or two they would both be off their feet.
But he also succeeded in throwing off Mabel’s aim, just as her free arm was
cocked for a third blow.
“ I said let me GO!! ” she screamed, swinging with all her strength, intending
to pound Dipper's shoulder again. But as she started being pulled off balance,
Mabel's open palm instead struck the side of Dipper's face at full power,
connecting flush across his cheek from jaw to temple.
Dipper saw the impact coming, but had no time to even brace himself. He heard a
sickening “smack” noise, and a very brief flash of intense pain exploded in his
head as his concussion-sensitive brain was rattled inside his skull. The sight
of Mabel's enraged face in front of him was quickly overwhelmed by blinding
light, and then there was nothing.
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From downstairs, Stan had been hearing the rising volume in the kids’ voices.
He couldn’t make out what they were saying, but it was obvious things weren’t
going well. Then their bedroom door at the top of the stairs was opened, and he
heard Mabel yelling frantically and swearing.
That was enough for Stan. As he willed his aching muscles to propel him up the
stairs as fast as they could get him there, he heard sounds of physical
struggle, along with Mabel screaming for Dipper to let her go. He appeared in
the doorway just in time to see Mabel deliver a devastatingly hard slap to the
side of Dipper’s face. The crack of skin striking skin echoed around the attic
as the twins both fell into a heap.
“ Jeez! ” he shouted, leaning over and easily pulling Mabel up off the floor.
One glance at Dipper, splayed out on his back, told him all that he needed to
know.  Shit! She knocked the kid out cold!
Stan needed to attend to him, but he also had to deal with Mabel. His niece's
eyes were hysterical, but the rest of her was frozen.  She’s in shock , he
thought.  Good, at least she probably won’t do anything more at this point.
She didn't resist as he firmly lowered her to sit on the floor. “Don’t move!”
he ordered directly into her face, then turned to crouch over Dipper.
He carefully slid a hand under the boy’s head and checked his breathing,
verifying that it was regular, although a bit shallow. A moment later, Stan
exhaled in relief as Dipper’s eyes fluttered open and he began panting harder.
His stare was glassy, and he started to thrash. “M- … Mabel …” he moaned.
“Woah woah woah,” Stan said softly, carefully but firmly holding Dipper down
and keeping his nephew’s head from shaking from side to side. “You got your
bell rung pretty good there, kid! Just keep still.” Dipper quickly relaxed.
“Good … good.” Stan’s gruff voice managed to sound amazingly soothing.
Dipper's eyes darted back and forth. “Mabel?” he called out louder, then winced
as he squeezed his face muscles tightly in obvious pain.
“She's right here,” Stan replied reassuringly. Keeping his support of Dipper's
head steady, he shuffled himself around so that he was no longer kneeling
between the twins. “Mabel's not going anywhere.” He turned his head and
directly addressed the girl. “Isn't that right?” he asked pointedly.
Mabel’s expression had not changed. Sitting with her back against the wall
beside the door, she was hugging her knees tightly to her chest and was staring
wide-eyed out the small window on the other side of the room. She seemed to be
unaware that she was gingerly cradling the hand that she had hit Dipper with.
Still, she nodded in reply to Stan’s question.
Stan gave his head a shake.  Damn, these two are quite a pair , he mused sadly.
===============================================================================
Mabel couldn’t watch as Grunkle Stan helped Dipper to his feet. Instead she
buried herself in Sweatertown, forced to listen to Dipper’s groans of pain as
he shuffled his way to his bed, supported by their uncle.
How has it gotten this bad?  she wondered. Her hand was throbbing badly, every
beat of her heart sending a jab of pain from her wrist right up to the tips of
all four of her fingers. But she knew her discomfort paled to what Dipper was
going through.  I got angry again. And I hurt Dipper. Again!  Mabel idly
pondered if this cycle of bitterness and injury was all that she and her
brother were destined to experience together.
Obliquely, she was aware of Stan’s uncharacteristically gentle ministrations on
the other side of the room. “Easy, kid,” Stan said quietly as Dipper sat down
carefully. “Just take it slow. Swing your legs up while I hold your noggin.” A
split-second pitiful whine escaped as Dipper laid down with his uncle’s
assistance. “You should rest. And you’ll need something for pain. I know you’re
trying to get off them, but now’s when you  should  take one or two of your
Oxycontin pills.” He addressed his niece over his shoulder, not turning around.
“Sweetie, Dipper’s pain meds are in my office. Go down and look in-”
“ No! ” moaned Dipper urgently, his hand gripping Stan’s arm.
The old man looked down with a crooked smile. “Don’t be a hero, kid! A couple
of your Oxy now won’t bring back your addiction, not as long as-”
Dipper weakly shook his head. “Not that … it’s just …wherever you’re keeping
the pills …” He voice dropped to a whisper, but it was still loud enough to
carry across the attic. “...  you can’t let Mabel know where they are! ”
The old man turned to look at Mabel and her withdrawn state, and then slouched
as he understood the reason for the fight before he got upstairs. “Ah, crap!”
he muttered. “All right, I’ll get them. Suck it up for a minute, okay?” he told
Dipper, patting his nephew’s shoulder. At Dipper’s small nod, Stan straightened
and then approached Mabel. He eased himself down onto the floor and leaned back
against the wall beside the despondent girl. Her head remained buried inside
her oversized knitted sweater.
Stan broke the short silence. “You gotta talk to me, Pumpkin,” he said softly.
“Tell me what’s going on.”
The sweater-encased lump shrugged. “Nothing,” came the glum reply.
Grasping her lightly by the back of the neck, Stan gave Mabel a little shake.
“Not good enough, you little munchkin,” he growled with good-natured
admonishment. Then more seriously, he gently continued, “Look … I need to know
that you’re safe right now.”
Mabel sighed. “I’m not gonna do anything, Grunkle Stan,” she mumbled, her voice
muffled from within the thick garment. “I let myself feel happy.  Big  mistake!
Like I said before, when I don’t keep all the stupid junk stuffed inside,
everything just comes back on me, only worse.” Her head slowly emerged until
the neck of the sweater snapped down below her chin. “Then .... when I get
frustrated, I guess I say dumb stuff … And  do  even dumber stuff.” She took a
deep breath and released it in a “whoosh”, finally half-looking at her uncle.
“I’m okay now.”
Stan grunted noncommittally. “Good,” he replied, struggling back to his feet.
“But just the same, you’re hanging out with me for the rest of this morning,
all right?” he said, extending a hand to Mabel. She nodded once and took the
offered hand, allowing Stan to pull her upright.
He turned back to Dipper. “I'll be back up in a minute, kid.” The boy moaned
back a quiet acknowledgement.
Mabel vacantly stood beside her uncle, her throbbing hand tucked into an
armpit, the other hand occupied with kneading a large quantity of her long
brown hair. In her peripheral vision she could see Stan waiting, giving her an
opportunity to say something to her brother.
But she couldn't do it. Without another word or a look back, she shuffled out
the door and down the stairs.
Dropping limply to the sofa, she set her mind to the task of once again
building up emotional barriers in her brain. The walls seemed to be getting
weaker every time they collapsed.
===============================================================================
Dipper was hurting almost as much because of Mabel’s rejection of him as he was
from his new head trauma. When Stan reappeared upstairs minutes later with two
Oxycontin tablets, he didn’t hesitate to accept them, and he fell asleep
quickly after the effects of the pills kicked in. The familiar opiate high had
thankfully faded almost entirely by the time he woke up in the afternoon.
He made his way downstairs, hungry and a bit woozy, and with only a small
headache. Stan verified that it was very doubtful Dipper had suffered any
additional concussion damage, and checked the welt that had grown on the side
of the boy’s face from the force of Mabel's slap. Dipper agreed with his uncle
that there was little benefit to seeing a doctor, and doing so would only raise
difficult questions as to how the injury occurred.
Once again, Dipper was forced to figuratively tip-toe around Mabel. She
obviously wanted to be alone, and he gave her the space. While his sister half-
heartedly began knitting yet another sweater with the new yarn she’d received
for Christmas, Dipper slouched over his new tablet. It was a very quiet
afternoon in the Shack: what little conversation that occurred was initiated by
Stan between himself and his niece or nephew.
The evening meal was equally awkward. Mabel retreated upstairs after she had
eaten a small amount off of her plate, leaving Dipper alone with his uncle.
Stan pushed a Methadone capsule and two Tylenols across the table. “How are the
cravings now?” he asked.
Dipper shrugged as he popped the pills into his mouth and washed them down.
“Not  too  bad,” he replied unenthusiastically. “I don’t think they’re worse
than yesterday.”
“Good,” Stan nodded. “I bet you’ll have it all under control by next weekend.
Even after your little adventure this morning.” Dipper sighed and leaned on his
elbow lower over his plate, idly moving the food around with his fork. Stan
lightly cuffed Dipper on his non-bruised shoulder. “So what happened up there?”
Dipper swallowed another mouthful of water. “The same thing that happened back
home, a couple of weeks after school started. She flipped out when I said that
nothing can happen between the two of us when we go back to Piedmont. Why
can’t-” Dipper wearily massaged his temples, “... why can’t she understand that
this is the  only  way we can be together?”
The question hung between them. Stan adjusted his glasses and cleared his
throat. “Dipper … I don’t think it’s her fault. I don’t know that she  can  do
what you’re asking her to do.” At Dipper’s confused look, Stan continued, “I’m
sure you can control the way you’re feeling. Well, you  think  you can control
it. Enough to get by, anyways. But Mabel’s not like that, kid! She’s an open
book, and she knows it. You can’t expect her to be able to just bottle
everything up inside her.”
“But … but she  has  to-” Dipper stammered.
“She  can’t! ” Stan interjected. “C’mon, kid! You’ve got a brain in that head!
Listen to her.  Look  at her! Look at everything that’s happened since the
summer. Don’t you see how it’s affecting her? Can you say that  either  of you
are better off now than you were before your birthday? Do you honestly see any
way it gets any better, if you keep going the way you’re going?”
Dipper’s face was quivering, but to his credit his voice was steady. “Grunkle
Stan, are you … are you saying that I need to completely …  break things off
with Mabel? Just …  give up  on us?”
Stan’s eyes blinked closed for a long moment, and he took a pained breath. “...
Yeah … jeez, I feel terrible about this, but I guess that  is  what I’m
saying,” he replied, looking back at his nephew’s crushed expression.
“At the end of summer, you two agreed with me that you had to back things off.
Now I see what happened. You may not be a couple, but both of you really still
believe you  need  to be together. You’re handling it differently, but it’s the
same problem.” Stan reached out and put a hand on Dipper’s shoulder. “You don’t
have to stop caring about her. She’ll still be your sister, your best friend,
probably the most important thing in the world to you. You’re supposed to love
your sister.” His grip tightened. “But you’re not supposed to be  in  love with
her. Having each other  that  way is  never  going to work. I tried to tell
Mabel a few days ago, now I’m telling you. You’ve got to …  move on!  You  both
have to!”
Part of Dipper was furious at his uncle for the things he was saying, and
wanted to lash out.  No! He can’t tell us to break up! We love each other, and
Stan is NOT going to break us apart!  But another part saw the terrible logic
of Stan’s suggestion.  But what if we can’t get past all this crap? What then?
He hated to admit it to himself, but he could see some wisdom in what Stan was
telling him.
But while he obliquely considered how he might accept the notion of letting go
of how he felt, he was more concerned with his twin. “But … what about how this
would affect Mabel? This morning she went crazy when she only  thought  I was
going to break up with her. What would she do if I really meant it? She
threatened to  kill  herself just this morning!”
Stan was now less sure of how good his advice was. “I’ll be there with you, to
keep her safe,” he said, trying to sound reassuring. “Look … don’t do anything
tonight. I think you both should have a night’s rest before you try to work
anything out. I’ll think of a way to soften the blow. We’ll get a fresh start
in the morning, you know?”
“Yeah, okay,” Dipper said. He scratched his arm nervously. “I don’t think
sleeping in the same room as Mabel tonight is going to be very comfortable for
her.”  Or for me either,  he thought. “Maybe I could sleep in Great Uncle
Ford’s room?”
“Good idea,” agreed Stan. “Your parents left the bed made up, so that’s no
problem.”
They walked together towards the formerly-secret room that Soos had discovered
the previous year. Dipper stopped short at the base of the staircase. “I need
to get some stuff from the attic, and … I need to say goodnight to Mabel,” he
said quietly.
Stan turned. “Want me to come up with you?” he asked carefully.
Dipper shook his head. “I’ll be fine, Grunkle Stan.”
He started up the stairs. “ We’ll  be fine,” he amended, talking to himself.
Dipper needed some time to think, and retreating to a room of his own seemed
like the best idea.  I don’t know if Stan’s right, but I can’t dismiss it , he
thought sadly.  I can’t imagine having to destroy everything Mabel and I have
together, but maybe I have to.
As he reached the top step, he hoped that the two of them could complete a
brief interaction together without further drama. When his light knocks went
unanswered, Dipper opened the bedroom door. Mabel was turned away from the door
and laying on her side, arms tucked under her head.
“Hey, uh ... I know my being up here would be … kinda weird for you,” said
Dipper after he stepped to the middle of the floor. “I thought I’d sleep
downstairs. Just for tonight, okay?” Mabel didn’t reply, but she nodded her
head. “Okay,” Dipper repeated gently. After he gathered up his sleeping shorts,
a notepad and pen, and two books, he glanced with discomfort towards his
sister’s bed. “Well … I guess … I’ll see you tomorrow,” he mumbled as he
shuffled back towards the door.
Mabel half turned over as Dipper reached the other side of the room. “Dipper?”
she called out meekly.
Dipper stopped with his hand on the door knob. “Yeah?” he replied, turning his
head back towards her.
“I … I’m sorry,” Mabel stammered, looking down. “... Is your head okay?”
Shrugging his shoulders, Dipper rubbed his head without thinking. “It’ll be
fine. And … I’m sorry too.” A corner of his mouth twitched. “Is your  hand
okay?”
Mabel half-grimaced. “Yeah.” She managed to return Dipper’s nearly
imperceptible smile. “You have a really hard head, you know?”
“Thanks … I think,” he replied with small ironic amusement, unable to resist
bantering with his sister, regardless of how awkward the situation.
A long moment of silence fell on them again. Dipper shifted, indicating he was
about to turn back to the door, when Mabel again spoke up. “I’d understand if
…” she began, followed by another uncomfortable pause.
“What?” Dipper prodded, waiting motionless.
Mabel deliberately looked away. “I was thinking back to that day at the Mystery
Fair, when we met that time travel guy. And how his tape measure gizmo was able
to take us back in time so you could change things and try to make things
better.” Dipper waited while Mabel gathered her thoughts. “And I was thinking
that if we saw him now, if you could change things again … I’d understand if
you went back to make it so … we never went to Portland for our birthday.”
Dipper’s knees almost buckled. The memories of the events of their life-
changing birthday in late August flooded over him. The embarrassing but
authentic sparks of attraction. The mutual self-realizations of their intense
feelings. Their confessions of love for one another. Giving their virginities
to one another in a perfect night of lovemaking. He realized the suggestion
that he could erase it all from ever happening was … horrifying! It gave him a
genuine taste of what it might feel like to actually put an end to their
relationship, as Stan had suggested minutes earlier. The revelation made him
feel sick, that he could even consider a course of action that felt so  wrong
now.
“No,” he muttered almost inaudibly, “I couldn’t do that.”
“But isn’t all this worse?” Mabel asked. “What if none of this ever happened to
us? We’d be  normal  kids again. We’d have …”
Mabel continued speaking, but Dipper was no longer listening. He remembered the
talk he and Stan had earlier, when Stan told him he was better equipped for all
this than was his twin. Dipper had thought he was emotionally tougher than
Mabel. He thought he could handle the pressure, and be strong enough for both
of them.
But he wasn’t! He was certain of that now. Mabel may have worn her heart on her
sleeve, but no matter how well he tried to control them, Dipper’s emotions were
just as desperate as hers. And when the moment would come for his feelings to
explode, as he now knew they would, he’d be in just as bad a place as Mabel.
In that moment, Dipper resolved that he would  not  break up with Mabel. He
couldn’t. It was simply an impossibility!
The mention of their birthday in Portland also forced him to recall something
very important he’d learned that day at the end of the summer. Over dinner at
the fancy restaurant, Mabel had helped him figure out that he would know he was
in love when he would do anything for that person. Later that evening, when
Mabel was in distress, it was easy for him to tell himself that he’d do
anything for her. Making that connection had been the moment when he allowed
himself to feel what he’d been suppressing for months, perhaps years: he was in
love with his sister.
But he had said he’d do anything for her.  Anything!
Was that true? Had he done every single thing possible within his power for
her, and for their love together to survive?
No,  he thought to himself.  Not yet, I haven’t! And I can’t do what I need to
do alone. I’ve always been too proud ... or too scared ... to ask for help.
His eyes were drawn to his bed, knowing the thick book he’d been reading
earlier in the week was waiting for him. He closed his eyes and centered
himself. When his eyes opened again, he was staring directly through the
window, and he knew he was ready to commit.
Dipper realized Mabel had been silent for several moments, and he finally
returned his attention to her. “So …” she moaned, “... I  really  hate thinking
this … but maybe we-”
“Please!” Dipper interrupted. “Just … please just … wait for one more day! I
need a little more time! Please don’t-” Dipper’s throat closed, and he gasped,
“... please don’t give up on anything. Not yet!”
Mabel forced a stoic expression on her face, and she silently complied with
Dipper’s plea.
Dipper put his books and notepad on his bed, and reached under the mattress for
the black hard-cover volume that sat hidden beneath. As he pulled it out, he
obscured the front of the book so that Mabel could not see the large white
cross and the “Holy Bible” title inscribed on the cover.
Piling his books and clothing in his arms, Dipper pulled them tightly to his
chest. He faced Mabel, his cheeks flushed. “Well … g’night Mabel. I’ll see you
… at breakfast, okay?” as he backed up to the door and opened it.
“Okay,” Mabel replied weakly. “... Night, Dipper.”
“Night,” Dipper whispered back, stepping through and closing the door behind
him.
He leaned against the doorframe, took a deep breath, and held it.  This is it,
Dipper , he told himself.  This is the moment you take the leap of faith. It’s
now or never!
His let his breath go in a loud whoosh, and then he trotted down the stairs.
Before Stan could question him, he quickly hustled into Ford’s room, closed the
door behind him, and turned the lock.
===============================================================================
***** Chapter 12 *****
===============================================================================
Sleep hadn’t come easy that night for Mabel. Even with all the trouble she’d
had with Dipper that day, it still seemed wrong to have to sleep in the attic
alone. She missed his light snoring, and the comforting feeling of knowing he
was there with her.
But the time alone had not been completely wasted. It gave Mabel an opportunity
to see just how insane things had really gotten.  I can’t believe that was
really me , she thought, remembering the out-of-control girl that was
determined to harm herself in whatever way she could, then knocked her brother
unconscious.  I wish I could make Dipper understand that his idea of being safe
is the same as breaking up! But still, he’s right! We can’t keep going this
way. Something has got to change.
What if I really do have to let go?  she thought.  Could I ever think that I
could be able to move on without him? What if … what if breaking up really is
the best thing for us?  The questions and anxiety flowed through her, bringing
her to anguished tears several times. She tossed and turned for hours before
finally the sadness and frustration could keep her awake no longer, and she
nodded off between two and three o’clock. Having been up over twenty hours at
that point, she’d fallen soundly to sleep.
It was after ten when she awoke. After moaning and stretching, she sat up and
allowed her feet to drop heavily over the side of the mattress.  Must’ve been
crying when I fell asleep , she sullenly mused to herself as she rubbed the
crusties out of her eyes. When she was finally satisfied that she had picked
out all the gross foreign invaders, she raised her eyelids.
Just a few feet away, Dipper sat on the edge of his own bed, silently staring
at Mabel.
Startled, Mabel screamed, triggering a short, loud scream from Dipper as well.
Dipper put a hand to his forehead while Mabel pressed her palms to her chest
while they both panted from the inadvertent twin jump-scares.
“Sweet Sally, Dipper!” Mabel scolded irritably between gasps. “What are you
doing, sitting there all quiet and creepy? … How long have you been there?”
Dipper fought to calm himself as well. “For a while … I’m sorry, didn’t mean to
scare you …”
Mabel took a good look at Dipper. He looked haggard, with even darker circles
than normal under his eyes. He hair was a mess, and he was definitely wearing
the same clothes as the day before.
“You don’t look like you’ve slept,” she said skeptically. “Did you even go to
bed?”
Dipper shrugged. “No,” he admitted. “I had … a lot to work out.”
“Yeah?” Mabel asked without much enthusiasm. “What about?”
“Us,” replied Dipper softly.
Mabel regarded him tiredly. “Dipper, I really don’t wanna deal with this, okay?
Not now, not when we just keep saying the same things over and over again.”
“But I-” began Dipper.
“Just go to bed!” Mabel interrupted. “I might feel up to talking later, so you
may as well get some sleep now.”
Dipper wanted to protest further, but Mabel shut him down and stalked away to
the stairs, headed down towards the bathroom. She was tired, grumpy, in no mood
to listen, and she wanted time to think. Her thoughts the previous night had
been about the possibility of giving up on being able to stay together with
Dipper romantically, and she wanted to be in a better frame of mind before
being forced to face him once again.
===============================================================================
Morning gave way to midday, then afternoon. What had been a brilliantly clear
and cold sunny day became overcast, dampening the atmosphere of the Mystery
Shack further. Just one week removed from the winter solstice, daylight had
disappeared well before five o’clock. Stan was tossing together a thick turkey
stew for dinner, made from the remaining leftovers of their Christmas meal. It
seemed like another day was already drawing to a close.
And yet, Dipper did not lie down to rest. As the day progressed, he stayed out
of Mabel’s way, but was conspicuously present at all times.
Mabel sprawled in Stan’s chair in front of the television, staring
disinterestedly at the third rerun that day of a documentary on the community
access television station. Interest in watching the biography of the life and
times of Gravity Fall’s deceased mayor Eustace Befuttlefumpter had waned hours
ago. Her eyes flicked over to the sofa where her brother sat with a science
fiction magazine. He was ostensibly engrossed in his reading, but Mabel was
aware he hadn’t turned the page once since he’d sat down over a half hour
before.
She sighed in resignation. “OK, fine, Dipper,” she conceded reluctantly,
pushing herself to her feet and heading for the attic. “I’ll listen to whatever
you gotta say.” She heard him following as she ascended the stairs. Dipper had
latched the door closed behind them before she finished sitting down on her
bed.
“Mabel,” Dipper began without preamble, “you were right! I was wrong for
cutting off everything between us. There  is  a place for us! Not just here and
now, but back at home, too! We belong together, and I think we  should  be
together!”
Dipper’s short speech sounded well practiced. Mabel suspected that he’d
rehearsed it many times in his head. Her face was expressionless.
“Um …” Dipper continued, “... what I mean is … I see everything that you were
talking about. About your needs, and stuff. And … and  I  need them too! I know
that now.”
Mabel continued her inscrutable examination of Dipper.
Sweat burst on Dipper’s forehead. “What I’m  trying  to say is … is that after
seeing things from your perspective … I  want  us to be .. you know …  lovers!
And everything that goes with it! I think the risks-” He cleared his throat. “I
think we can risk it. I think that ... as long as we’re careful, we can … we
can do this. We can  do  this, Mabel!” He searched Mabel’s face for agreement,
or even acknowledgement.
After a long silence, Mabel finally responded. “Dipper … I don’t think you
believe that,” she said softly.
Dipper drew a breath to reply, but didn’t get a chance to disagree. “I let you
talk, Dipper!” she interjected. “Now please, let me!” She could tell it was
difficult for him, but he remained wordless.
“I get it. Because of what happened yesterday, and last week,” Mabel said. “I
know that … I’m … pretty messed up. I shouldn’t have threatened to …” she
couldn’t look Dipper in the eye, “ kill  myself.” She wiped her face quickly.
“None of that is your fault. It’s mine! I shouldn’t have done that. And I  get
it! I scared you. It was scary for  me , too!”
Looking away, Mabel continued. “But … I think you said all that just now
because you’re just tryin’ to make me feel better. That’s not a reason to
completely go back on everything you think.”
“Mabel-”
“It doesn’t make  sense , Dipper!” Mabel plowed on. “I might go nuts and say or
do something new and weird and different. But  you  wouldn’t! After how you
were talking yesterday,  none  of what you just said now sounded like  anything
you would think. Not unless … you’re just saying what you  think  I want you to
say!”
“That’s not it!” pleaded Dipper. “Please, Mabel, let me explain-”
“Dipper I’m trying to figure out what you’ve been saying since that bus ride
home and about all the stuff Grunkle Stan has been saying!” Mabel cried, the
words spilling out. “Maybe we  shouldn’t  have let things get this far! Maybe
we  should  try to move on! Mayb-”
“ NO!! ” exclaimed Dipper. There was sheer panic on his face, and he leaped
forward, grasping Mabel tightly by the arms. “No, that’s  not  what I was
saying!! Please, you’ve  got  to give me a few minutes!”
Mabel was dumbfounded by the role reversal. She was trying very hard to change
the way she saw their relationship, to bring herself to look at everything like
the way she thought Dipper had been trying to make it. And now  he  was the one
insisting that they be closer together than they had been! What was going on?
“Just a few minutes? Okay?” Dipper begged desperately, his grip firm on her
arms.
Eyeing her brother warily, Mabel consented. “Okay.”
Dipper loosened his hold and blew out a relieved sigh, then his expression set
again. He turned and paced to the other side of the room while rubbing his
hands together, then spun on his heel and came back. After repeating his steps
a second time, he stopped beside his bed and sat, head bowed in an internalized
debate.
Finally he looked up at Mabel. “I know that this is going to sound pretty
strange, given everything I’ve said before,” he said. “But after I said
goodnight last night, after what happened to me … it’s different!  I’m
different!”
Mabel tried to hide her natural impatience, but it was difficult. “What
happened?  What’s  different?” she prodded.
“Everything!” Dipper replied immediately. “I’ve been wanting to tell you all
day! That I’m not afraid anymore! I don’t  have  to be afraid anymore! Because
I don’t have to make any promises  alone  anymore! I … I asked for help.”
Confusion was obvious in Mabel’s knitted eyebrows. “You stayed up and talked to
Grunkle Stan all night?”
Dipper shook his head. “No, not Stan …” He ran a hand through his hair. “Mabel,
I know neither of us have been nearly as religious as Mom and Dad, but over the
last while … I've really started to see what it's all about. And what the Bible
has to say. And … and last night …” he swallowed, and looked down slightly,
“... I gave myself to Jesus. I asked for  His  help.”
Mabel’s mouth fell open slightly, her eyes incredulous. Dipper had been right:
this  did  sound very strange to her! True, the twins had been attending church
with their evangelical parents all their lives. But while Mabel had not
completely decided what she did or did not accept from Sunday teachings, Dipper
had  never  indicated any leanings at all towards a strong Christian belief.
She never thought it seemed to fit with his logical mind and questioning
personality. But now here he was, showing a side of himself she had never seen
before.
“... Wow,” Mabel said softly. “I … I had no idea, Dipper.”
He shrugged, still not making eye contact. “I haven’t wanted to make a big deal
of it. I’ve kinda been, you know … working it out on my own.” He leaned his
head over towards the head of his bed. “You know that black book I pulled out
from under the bed last night?” Dipper asked. At Mabel’s nod, he continued,
“It’s my copy of the Bible that I’ve kept here at the Shack. I pull it out
every so often. I’ve hidden it here since last summer. Since before … you know
… the whole ‘Weirdmageddon’ thing happened.”
“That long?” Mabel gasped, astonished that Dipper had kept this a secret from
her for well over a year.
Dipper nodded. “Yeah. Then after going to church with Mom and Dad last Sunday,
it kind of got driven home.” His eyes met hers. “All this crazy stuff we’re
dealing with! Us being together, my concussion and other injuries, the pills …
I should never have thought that I could ever control all this myself. I was
insane to think it was possible! I’ve been fighting my whole life to have
control  over my life. So last night … I let go. I prayed, and … I asked Him to
take  control. I prayed to God that He do to me what He wants ... and that I
would obey.”
Mabel was as rigid as stone, amazed by what her brother was telling her, though
still not comprehending that what she was hearing was true.
“And the most incredible thing happened!” Dipper continued. “I actually  felt
the weight of everything fall from my shoulders! All the stress, the
uncertainty … it was just  gone!  And this … peaceful kind of feeling came over
me.” An unconscious smile crossed his face. “It was comforting … kind of like a
warm blanket, only  way  nicer, and-” He stopped short, then looked timidly at
Mabel. “... you won’t laugh at this part?”
Feeling she was almost in a trance, Mabel merely shook her head.
Dipper’s gaze was unfocused as he recalled the experience. “I  heard  His
voice, Mabel! I swear I could hear Him talking to me … telling me … that
everything’s going to alright!” He refocused on Mabel, his face optimistic and
hopeful.
Mabel couldn’t quite bring herself to believe what she thought he was saying.
“Dipper,  what  do you think is going to be alright?”
“ Us! ” Dipper exclaimed. “More than just us, actually! I felt … I felt this
love  coming from Him, I felt Him ... letting me know it was okay for me to
just  accept  it, to  go with it! ” He waved his hands excitedly. “The Bible
says that we’re to love Him, to love ourselves, and love others. I  heard  Him,
Mabel! He said He wants me allow myself to experience that love fully! In every
way! That includes  you and me! ”
It may have been for reasons that Mabel could not have predicted, but Dipper
was offering exactly what she dearly wanted: an opportunity for the two of them
to continue, loving one another in a genuine romantic relationship. But she'd
also allowed herself to think this had happened the previous morning, and that
had ended up being a disaster. How could she be assured that it would be
different this time?
I want so much for this to be real,  she thought.  But it would just be too
much to be wrong again! I couldn’t stand it if I was wrong about this again so
soon! This story he's saying … it's unbelievable! I've never heard Dipper say
anything like this about religious stuff. I need to keep my “skepticles” on
tight!
“Dip, this is … really  weird! ” she said. “I’m sure you think you heard
something, but couldn’t this be … you know ... ‘cause you just got knocked out
yesterday? Maybe you’re just hearing stuff … stuff that’s only in your head?”
“No way! I’ve had a head injury before, Mabel. I know what it’s like,” argued
Dipper. “If what I heard was a hallucination, I’d have had other symptoms. No,
I really heard Him!”
Mabel’s emotional defenses slipped a bit further. She continued to fight
against it. “OK, what if it was someone else talking to you? Or some- thing
else? We’ve seen a bunch of cray-cray stuff happen around here, you know? Maybe
you’ve got some invisible wizard or something whispering in your ear?”
“C’mon, Mabel! You’ve seen it yourself that all the weird things about Gravity
Falls disappeared after summer last year,” Dipper said. “We were here almost
three months again this past summer, and  nothing  happened that was unusual.
Great Uncle Ford was right: Weirdmageddon was the end of the weirdness to this
area!
Mabel put her face in in her hands.  He’s right! This town was totally normal
all this summer! Why would there be any change now?  Her palms slapped down
onto her thighs as she drew at one last straw. “I don’t know the whole Bible. I
mean, I don’t even remember all the books in the New Testament, let alone the
Old,” she said, forcing herself to remain collected. “But I’m  pretty  sure
that there must be some verse in there somewhere that says siblings shouldn’t
be gettin’ to know each other in the …  biblical  sense! You know?” Her hands
gripped together tightly in her lap. “Isn’t the Bible supposed to be God’s
word, or something? How do you figure that works with what your voice told
you?”
Dipper scratched the back of his neck. “Yeah … I realize that probably doesn’t
fit ... And I guess I don’t have all the answers. But ... “ He leaned forward,
hands balled into fists, struggling to verbalize his thoughts. “... Mabel, I
swear that after what I felt,  it doesn’t matter!  I  know  what I experienced,
and I  know  it’s true! It’s like …” Dipper’s eyes squeezed shut tightly for a
long moment. When they reopened, he refocused on his sister. “It’s like I  know
that there’s someone above us, watching over us all the time. That He’s there
keeping our love safe! I’m absolutely  certain  of it!”
Oh God,  thought Mabel,  could this really be happening? Could Dipper really
have heard God’s word? Could Jesus’ message of peace and love really mean that
my feelings for Dipper could be forgiven? Would He really protect us and allow
us to be together? It seems so wrong to think about, but so RIGHT to feel it!
“I just ... Dipper ...“ she whimpered, looking away.
Dipper slid forward off the edge of his bed and knelt on the floor in front of
Mabel, peering up at her. “Look, even if I’m wrong, even if I didn’t hear
anything  … you don’t even have to believe it! What matters is  I’ve  been the
reason we’ve been apart, and I promise … I’m  not  going to be getting in our
way any longer!”
He gently took her hands in his. Mabel’s resistance was close to gone. She
could not avoid his intense gaze, and her vision blurred from new tears
building up in her eyes.
“We were  meant  to be together, Mabel,” Dipper said, his voice cracking.
“You’ve been trying to tell me for months, and I’ve been an idiot trying to
resist it. I was scared, but I’m not scared anymore! We don’t have to be …
‘cause we’re the Mystery Twins, dammit!” He half chuckled, half sobbed. “As
long as we work together, and we take care of each other,  nothing  can ever
keep us apart! You believe that, right?”
Nothing could stem the torrent of tears streaming down Mabel’s face. She swept
away all of her remaining doubt, nodding vigorously and bursting into a loud
wail of happiness.
“I … love you … you big … corny … dork!” she stammered between cries.
Dipper smiled with giddy happiness. “I love you too, Mabel,” he murmured back.
He leaned up and gently put his hand on the back of her head.
Mabel lunged and straightened up, grabbing hold of Dipper and pushing them back
towards his bed. They landed on their sides still locked in a tight embrace,
their mouths firmly against one another.
===============================================================================
Stan shook his head ruefully.
He had just climbed the stairs, ready to let the kids know that supper was
ready. He expected that a meal might be a welcome interruption for his niece
and nephew from more arguments and hurt feelings. Sure enough, he had heard the
sound of Mabel crying in the main attic room beyond the closed door.
His knuckles had been poised, about to knock, when he also heard an unexpected
sound: two tearful, quiet proclamations of love. Followed immediately by the
protest of mattress springs, and gasps and moans of passion from two young
teenagers.
Guess they’ve made their choice,  he thought, withdrawing his raised fist. It
wasn’t the call he would have made for them. He knew that they’d chosen a path
that, while perhaps rewarding now, was certain to be very difficult in times to
come. He didn’t regret encouraging them to forego the danger of such a taboo
attraction, to let it go and move on as simply brother and sister again. He was
certain his advice was the better choice for them.
And yet, a small and sappy part of him was secretly happy for them, hoping
against hope that they shared a love together that just might be enough to
overcome any obstacle thrown their way.
Might as well leave them be , he thought as he quietly descended back down to
the lower level.  I’m betting they won’t be done for awhile.
Stan served himself a large bowl of stew and sat down in his comfortable chair
in front of the old television. He would be more than satisfied spending the
evening eating his supper, while watching his favorite shows on the “Black and
White Period Piece Old Lady Boring Movie Channel.” Preferably with the volume
turned up louder than usual.
===============================================================================
“I’m sorry …” Dipper gasped, a shamed, wide-eyed expression on his quivering
face. “...  I’m sorry  …”
Mabel caressed his cheek. “It’s okay,” she whispered, eyes twinkling with
suppressed mirth.
Dipper’s eyes slammed shut. He made a strangled noise of tension, his forehead
pressed against his sister’s. Laying on her side facing him, Mabel slid her
hand from his face to behind his head. Her legs entwined with his, she
tightened her hold with her entire body and pulled him firmly to herself as he
groaned urgently, followed by deep panting. Her other hand was between them,
lightly gripping Dipper’s twitching penis. Warm semen was leaping from the tip,
pooling on their stomachs and chests between their naked bodies. His suppressed
moans faded as the last drops puddled into their belly buttons.
After several long moments of trying to regain his breath and dignity, Dipper
gingerly reached with his free hand for his discarded t-shirt hanging over the
edge of the mattress behind Mabel’s head. His face twisted in embarrassment, he
began the awkward task of pushing a corner of the cotton garment down between
them and started mopping up. Wearing a broad, fond grin, Mabel decided to allow
Dipper to handle cleanup duty, since she had one hand busy running fingers
through his hair, and the other occupied with his gradually wilting erection.
Dipper sourly regarded Mabel’s satisfied smile. “It’s not funny,” he mumbled as
he folded the sticky mess over inside the shirt and started wiping their skin
again with a cleaner portion of fabric.
“I’m not laughing,” Mabel replied, her smile softening with sincerity. “I’m
just really happy to see that big ol’ Big-O face of yours, again!”
Dipper’s gentle ministrations continued as she lightly pecked his nose with her
lips, generating a bashful look from her brother. “Yeah, well I guess it’s
safer out here than … you know ...” His eyes rolled downwards, “... in  there!
”
Mabel's demeanor became serious for an instant as she quickly thought of the
current date, then she relaxed again. “It’s okay, don’t worry,” she declared
dismissively.
Concern flashed through Dipper. “But … but you could-”
“Dipper … I’m due for my little ‘crimson tide’ to start heading out a few days
from now.” She grinned at her bro’s mildly horrified face as he processed the
menstrual metaphor. “I’m safe! I'm pretty sure we don't have to worry about
it.”
Trusting his sister, Dipper nodded. He tossed the shirt on the floor, flopped
his head back down onto the pillow and exhaled loudly. He looked downcast, his
eyes showing both his fatigue and his disappointment in himself.
Mabel traced a finger through his hair. “Dip, it’s really okay,” she whispered
with affection. “Hair-trigger or not, I love that  I’m  the one who can do that
to you!”
Dipper shrugged. “I just wish that, you know … you couldn’t do that to me quite
so  quickly  …”
“Well, you  did  last a lot longer than the last time we did this,” Mabel said
quietly with pride, nuzzling her nose to Dipper’s.
“Maybe a little,” he agreed shyly.
Mabel gave a quick tug on Dipper’s softened member. “Not so little a minute
ago,” she whispered saucily. Dipper’s grin finally appeared as their lips met.
The kiss began as gentle and playful, with soft pecks and blissful smiles. But
slowly, the intensity of the moment increased as they continued to experience
the joy of finally being together again, of no longer feeling any barrier
between them. Soon the noise of the winter breeze’s light rattling of the
window was drowned out by the sounds of skin caressing against skin, smacks of
tongues and lips, quiet gasps, and stifled moans.
Still holding tight to one another, the kids allowed their mouths to part
unhurriedly, and their gazes met again. Wordlessly they stared into one
another’s eyes, a silence that was both perfectly comfortable and taut with
intense emotion.
Mabel huffed with giddy frustration. “I don’t … I don’t know  how  to tell you
how you make me feel!” she breathed, a teary look of desperate happiness on her
face. “I just have these … dumb  words , and there’s so much  more  I want to
tell you about inside me, and … and …” She produced a muffled exclamation of
ironic annoyance as she started lightly tapping her forehead onto his.
“It’s okay, Mabel. I know,” murmured a smiling Dipper, brushing a small drop
from Mabel’s cheek. The smile grew as he gently pushed her over onto her back
and snuggled up to her side, an arm holding her tight under her shoulders, and
guiding his knee over her thigh. “I don’t have the right words either,” he
continued, still lovingly watching his twin's gaze back at him. His free hand
slid down from her face, caressing lightly over her breast and stomach. Mabel’s
mouth opened and she gasped with increasing arousal as his hand continued
towards its destination between her legs. “Let me  show  you exactly how  I
feel,” Dipper whispered.
Mabel whined and gently intercepted the hand, grasping Dipper’s wrist and
firmly holding it over her abdomen. “Dipperrrrrrrr! You … you don’t have to!”
she moaned. “You’re exhausted! We were just going to cuddle together until you
fell asleep, remember?”
If he was honest, Dipper would have admitted that his body and brain were both
very close to being completely spent. But there was no way he was going to
allow himself to succumb to fatigue now. His eyes flashed, another adrenaline
rush coursing through his body, giving him renewed energy. He quickly leaned
over Mabel’s face and pressed his mouth enthusiastically onto her lips. Their
tongues danced in a rhythm Mabel was unable to resist, drawing a louder moan
from her. Their lips separated with a loud smack. “I’m not tired!” he promised,
kissing her again. “And you deserve to feel good!”
The fingers of his trapped hand began a tantalizing tickle on Mabel’s skin
below her navel, forcing her to squirm and giggle. “ Quit it! ” she squealed,
then laughed louder as Dipper just grinned and sped up the movement of his
fingers. She had to force Dipper’s hand away, and brought their arms up to lay
on top of her chest. “I love you, you goober!” she cried, lowering her chin to
kiss his hand. “And … well yeah, of course I want to feel good, but … isn’t
there plenty of time for that later?”
“I don’t want you to wait anymore, Mabel,” pleaded Dipper. “It's been too long.
And I … I  need  you! I really want to feel you right now!“ Dipper’s hand was
being held to Mabel's chest, so he set his fingers to the task of lightly
caressing her breast. “... I need you to know …” Mabel gasped as a finger found
her nipple. “... that I …” Dipper hovered his lips over Mabel’s mouth, feeling
her shuddering exhale as his finger and thumb gently squeezed. “... love you,
too!” Mabel was beyond resisting, and her grip on his wrist involuntarily went
limp.
His hand now free, Dipper smirked and again patiently traced his fingers south
as he placed kisses on her face and neck. He felt soft pubic hair on Mabel’s
mound and she grimaced at the touch, but he kissed her with a warm smile while
experimentally moving his fingertips through her short curls in small, languid
circles. Extending his reach further, he ran a featherlight massage over her
outer privates. Mabel’s entire body was imperceptibly shaking in aroused
excitement.
Dipper coaxed Mabel's legs to spread a bit more and began carefully pressing
his middle finger between her labia, giving him access to her inner folds. His
fingertip found the entrance to her vagina, and he slowly pushed it into the
hot, moist tunnel. Mabel twitched and made a short, loud moan of pleasure. He
manipulated his finger in and out of her, sensuously painting her fluids
further up into her split with each stroke. Finally he drew his finger over her
clitoris with agonizingly slow speed, adoring the look of ecstasy that came
over Mabel’s face, her eyelids fluttering closed. Dipper placed his lips
sweetly over her eyes before making a trail of kisses down to her neck. He was
loving the feeling of Mabel’s uneven breaths and body shivers, caused by the
attention he was giving her with his finger and mouth.
He craned his neck back up to Mabel’s ear. “I love you!” he whispered almost
inaudibly. “ This  is how I want you to feel, and how I feel about you!” Then
he slid his mouth down, over her collarbone and to the firm breast closest to
him. His lips surrounded the nipple, gently squeezing it, followed by his mouth
opening and playing his tongue and teeth delicately over the erect nub. At the
same time, his hand slid lower, allowing his finger to carefully work its way
back inside of her while his thumb gently rubbed Mabel’s sensitive button.
“Oh my gosh!” Mabel gasped as her legs spasmed. She was unable to control her
reactions: Dipper’s loving assault was powerfully erotic. Mabel had been
suffering months of withdrawal from any arousal, her depression and drugs
working together to lower her sexual drive. She had not even felt the desire to
masturbate since the middle of September, not even once. Now intense physical
sensations ripped through her body, feelings magnified by her restored
relationship with her brother. She whimpered aloud, holding on to Dipper’s head
as he suckled passionately on her breast and caressed her most intimate parts.
Dipper was elated to feel how Mabel was responding to his ministrations. He
couldn’t recall her reactions to his mouth and fingers ever being so fervent
before. Without stopping, he glanced up to her face, and didn't think that she
had ever been so beautiful! Sliding his body against hers felt amazing, and he
rocked in rhythm with Mabel’s gyrations. He could tell that her breasts had
definitely grown a bit since he had last seen and touched them, and they felt
incredible against his cheek and lips. He lunged across her chest to nurse on
her other nipple, pulling his arm free from behind her neck to continue with
his free hand to fondle the one he'd abandoned.
A strangled noise escaped Mabel’s throat as she fought the urge to yell out
with pleasure. She wasn't sure how much time was passing as she felt as if a
coil within her was being compressed tighter and tighter. She needed the coil
to let go, and she writhed harder and faster against Dipper’s mouth and hands,
desperate for release. She obliquely wondered how her brother was able to do
this to her, and how deliriously happy he made her.
Sensing Mabel was on the brink of orgasm, Dipper latched his mouth firmly to
her breast and ground his teeth into her nipple with perfect pressure. Just as
her torso tensed, he drew his finger out and up to her clitoris, rubbing her up
and down as rapidly as he could.
That was more than enough stimulation for Mabel. Her every muscle went rigid,
and she felt that her entire body might fly apart. She could have sworn stars
began glowing behind her eyes. Then the stars burst and everything seemed to
explode. And the fireworks wouldn’t stop, as Dipper continued to lovingly
manipulate her over the edge again and again. She was barely aware of the
strained noises of pure joy she was making while she drowned in a sea of
overwhelming bliss.
“Stop!” Mabel finally managed to gasp, flailing and lightly hitting Dipper’s
head and hand. He grinned broadly, tweaked her once more to tease one last
ecstatic reaction out of her, then held her close as she helplessly splayed out
flat on her back and gulped great lungfuls of air.
Dipper nuzzled his mouth close to her ear. “I  love  it when you do that!” he
murmured.
“When  I  … do that?” Mabel panted incredulously. “That was all … you! I didn’t
… do anything!” Mabel’s whole body felt numb and electric at the same time.
Trying to give a better hug to this wonderful and considerate nerd, she raised
her arm and let it flop clumsily, dropping her palm with a soft smack onto
Dipper’s smiling cheek.
Her goofy style of showing affection made Dipper chuckle. Then he made an over-
exaggerated show of being knocked unconscious again by the blow, crossing his
eyes and letting his tongue hang out of his slackened mouth.
“Dipper ... you butt!” Mabel complained. “That … is  not  funny!” She thrust
her bottom lip out, trying to put on a comical display of pouting even as she
struggled to regain her breath.
Refocusing, Dipper got a look at Mabel's face and snorted again. “Yeah? Well
then go easier on me, okay?” he laughed, and gave her a hard full-body squeeze.
After reaching up for a tender kiss on her temple, he backed off only enough to
be able to look deeply into her eyes.
She fixed her gaze back on him. The expression on the cute, dorky face inches
in front of her was one of pure and limitless adoration, and something inside
her melted even more. She knew Dipper loved and cared about her, and had always
known this fact for as long as she could remember. But now, the face of this
boy revealed so much more, betraying the truth of how close the twins had
become. He’d said so before, but she now  knew  it: Dipper would do anything,
anything  at all in his power, for her. And  only  her!
It was impossible at that moment for Mabel to not fall in love with Dipper even
more.
Mabel could not let this realization pass. Dipper  had  to know what this meant
to her. He had to  know  how she felt about him. Immediately. And completely!
Her muscles reacted instantly. She grabbed his head with both hands and thrust
her mouth onto his.
Dipper squeaked in amusement, then made a wide-eyed exclamation of muffled
surprise as Mabel quickly twisted and wrapped her arms and legs around him. In
seconds she held him tightly and had pulled him on top of her, his pelvis
between her legs and his rejuvenated shaft resting directly on top of her
loins.
She broke the kiss. “I need you, Dipper! Now!” she gasped impatiently, pushing
her hand between them and reaching for his penis while grunting under Dipper’s
weight on her chest.
“Okay!” Dipper breathed, instantly invigorated by Mabel’s desire. It took him a
second to get his elbows and knees under himself, and no sooner had he done so,
he felt Mabel grasp his erection in one hand and a butt cheek in the other. She
guided him straight to her entrance. Mabel's insistence was catching, and as he
urgently snaked his arms beneath her lower back and neck, Dipper felt the tip
of his length penetrating her tight channel. Then Mabel wrapped herself around
him, crossing her ankles behind his thighs and her arms around his back.
For a split second time seemed to stop. Dipper supported his weight above Mabel
as they panted shakily, their foreheads and noses pressed together.
Then with a soft cry, he sheathed himself to the hilt in one stroke. And as he
wrapped his tongue around hers and squeezed her torso tightly to his own, his
hips kept pushing, trying to crush their bodies together even more if at all
possible.
Seconds before, Mabel was desperate for Dipper, needing to feel more of him.
Now, she felt  all  of him! His arms held her, his penis was deep within her,
his body and mouth covered her, and his love filled her. She rejoiced in their
pure intimacy together. Dipper’s tiny, fast pelvic thrusts were grinding his
pubic bone directly onto her defenseless clitoris nonstop. Another loud moan
escaped Mabel’s throat, her facial expression distorted, and she quivered
helplessly in Dipper’s embrace as a sustained, sweet climax washed over her.
As she slowly came down, Dipper loosened his hold on Mabel. He loved seeing the
look of supreme contentment on her face.
Mabel felt Dipper inside her, and knew he was still very hard. Her eyelids
fluttered open, and she looked back at him. She wondered if she could ever feel
better than this, and she knew she was about to find out.
“Again, Sir Dippin’ Sauce!” she whispered dreamily.
Dipper smiled. “As you wish, Lady Mabelton!” he murmured back. Very
deliberately, he drew back his hips, almost pulling his entire penis free. Then
Mabel pulled in a long, delighted breath as he pushed back in equally slowly.
“Agaaaaaaaaain!” Mabel sighed, placing a palm on Dipper’s cheek. He snorted
softly and gave her a tender kiss.
Then together, they made love.
They were unhurried, and had no fears or worries. Gone for the moment was
anyone who could hurt them, or their relationship together. The twins revelled
in the freedom they were finally allowed to experience. There was only each
other. It was the most beautiful moment either of them could possibly imagine.
The pace of the twins’ lovemaking increased very slowly, the rhythms of their
movements together inexorably synchronized. Despite their emotional distress of
the past months, a lifetime of knowing each other almost as much as themselves
prepared them for the perfect dance they shared now. Their young bodies heaved
and writhed together as one, glorious physical sensations joining with their
trust and faith in one another to drive them forward ever faster.
“Oh … Oh Dipper …” Mabel moaned.
There was no one else for Mabel, she knew without a doubt. She loved Dipper
with everything that she was! She could imagine no way that the universe could
ever allow for the creation of any emotion in her as strong as what she felt
for him.
“I love you, Dipper! … I love you … so  much! ” she panted as she moved in time
with Dipper’s thrusts.
“I love you … too, Mabel!” Dipper gasped back, holding himself up over her and
looking deliriously happy.
They were perfect together, she knew. It made no difference to her that he was
her brother! She only loved him  more  because of everything they had
experienced together! They had always been there for each other, even in the
womb. And they always would! Forever!
“And we’ll  always  be together …” Mabel cried happily, “... right?”
Dipper’s expression changed instantaneously. His smile disappeared. His eyes
opened wide as saucers. Mabel’s words had seemed to shock him to the core.
“Oh God!” he panted, completely serious. “I want nothing more … Mabel, I ... I
love you so much …” His movements resumed with even more ardor, as his
instincts ordered his body to demonstrate the intensity of how he felt.
Mabel could see and feel the desperate power of Dipper’s emotions. Her body
responded, clutching and moving with him.
“... I will do everything …” Dipper continued, wetness forming in his eyes.
“... I’ll do  anything  …” He continued making love to Mabel even more
fervently even as a tear dropped onto Mabel’s cheek
Not wanting to see Dipper in distress, Mabel reached up to lower him to her
breast, and to get him to stop and calm down. But he shrugged off the attempt.
“No! Mabel, you deserve so much!” he said tightly. “I can’t bear the thought
that … that we’d ever… that  I’d  ever do anything ...” Dipper tried and failed
to suppress a sharp sob, and a stream of tears leaked from his eyes. Even so,
his embrace tightened and his hips thrust even harder.
Then suddenly Dipper squeezed his eyes closed and he arched his back and neck.
“Oh my God please!” he cried out. “Please, you can do this! … You can let Mabel
and I be together!” Another wracking sob broke from his chest. “She deserves to
be happy! Sh- … she deserves …  everything!! ” he managed to choke. Even as he
took a huge unsteady breath, he still drove his body to keep up his attempts to
prove his love for his sister.
Mabel’s heart lunged at Dipper’s plea. She could hardly believe how much
emotion Dipper was capable of, that his love for her could be so strong! She
had never seen him beg and plead so hard before. He was exposing his deepest
vulnerability and newfound faith, all the while making her feel incredible
physical and emotional pleasure. And all for her! A high-pitched, almost
pitifully soft wail escaped her throat.
“I don’t deserve her!” Dipper sobbed, his eyes now wide open and staring at the
dark sky through the window. “But … please … if you could just … have mercy on
me!” His whole body moved in a frenzy now, attempting to fuse his body and soul
with Mabel. “ Please!! ” he begged desperately.
Mabel was overcome by Dipper’s passion and despair. Blithely unaware of her own
tears, she lunged up and clutched him tightly with her entire body. Every part
of her squeezed him as hard as she could, including his penis deep inside her
vagina, even as she knew she would fly apart at any moment.
“ PLEASE!! ” Dipper practically yelled. Then he let out a loud, anguished cry,
his self-control gone as the massive buildup of sexual stress in his groin
passed the point of no return. He collapsed into Mabel’s strong full-body
embrace as an unimaginably intense orgasm completely overwhelmed him.
Nothing could stop Mabel from climaxing at this point. An almost hysterical
scream of sympathy, love, and lust burst from her as she held her wonderful
brother, catching his salty tears on her face while feeling him throb deep
within her, his tears and semen becoming part of her. Nothing had ever felt so
intimate, so powerful before in her entire life!
After eventually releasing her grip, Mabel let Dipper slide sideways beside
her, and their muscles finally relaxed. They lay sprawled together in a sweaty,
teary pile on Dipper’s bed for several minutes, sobbing and gasping heavily for
air. Neither one could do anything but just stare in wonder at each other, near
disbelief that they’d just shared such an unforgetable and beautiful experience
together.
Mabel finally began feeling the chill of the cool attic air on her damp skin.
Without releasing Dipper’s hand, she reached down to the floor for her
discarded sweater and used it to wipe up the majority of the wet and sticky
coating from both of their bodies. Dipper let her work without speaking, the
rise and fall of his chest and his heavily lidded eyes the only parts of him
that moved.
Satisfied that they were both acceptably dried off, Mabel sat herself on the
mattress beside Dipper and pulled the sheet and heavy blanket up over them.
“It’s okay, Mabel,” Dipper muttered weakly. “I’m not tir-”
“Shush! You are, too!” Mabel interrupted. She quickly fluffed her pillow high
on the bed and laid down, pulling Dipper close with his head tucked by her
collarbone. “No more arguments, apologies, or hanky panky. You need to sleep!”
At first his exhausted face showed his defiance of her orders. But then he
smiled reluctantly and snuggled into her body, hugging her beneath the covers.
She felt the last of the tension in his muscles disappear.
“I love you, Mabel,” Dipper whispered into her chest.
“I know,” Mabel replied quietly, kissing the top of her brother’s head. “And I
love you, too!” Dipper was already half gone, and fell sound asleep seconds
later.
Mabel held him as he slept, secure in the knowledge that she was exactly where
she wanted to be. Sure, she felt gross and sticky, and could use a shower to
get cleaned up. And yeah, she was hungry and pretty darn thirsty, too. But all
that paled compared to resting there with Dipper. All the heartache and
depression was washed away, with only love in their place.
At last, after all this time, the Mystery Twins were complete again!
===============================================================================
 
***** Chapter 13 *****
===============================================================================
Dipper emerged groggily from a sound sleep into a thick and disagreeable
wakefulness. He was lying on his back with his mouth hanging open. Upon closing
it, he discovered with distaste that his tongue was dry and tasted awful.  He
really needed to take a leak. He craved food and water, and his joints and
muscles were sore. Oh yeah, and there were the usual drug cravings.
Uhhhggh , he thought to himself, eyes still closed.  Everything feels like
crap! Where am I? It’s so cold! Why am I in bed without my shirt and shorts?
Wh-
Then Dipper stopped and smiled, despite the gross feelings. As the fog cleared
from his brain enough for him to remember the previous evening, he felt the
presence of the warm body to his right, lying in the small bed with him. He
carefully turned his head to the side and cracked open his eyes. The attic was
illuminated by the bedside lamp, and he peeked at the face of his beautiful
sister sleeping next to him, just inches from his nose.
Mabel’s face was relaxed, and she looked wonderfully content. Dipper was once
again staggered by the feelings she generated in him. A shiver ran down his
back as her exhaled breaths tickled his cheek.  It’s real again! I can’t
believe it’s all real again!  he marvelled silently.  I get another chance, to
be what I should have been to Mabel before . In the low light of the attic, he
spent several minutes hearing his heart pound in his ears, just from watching
his twin sleeping peacefully. Then he closed his eyes again for a moment.
Thank you!  he prayed with complete sincerity.  I don’t know if I deserve this,
but thank you!
But he could ignore the complaints of his body no longer. He needed to get up
and pee, if nothing else. Carefully rolling over back away from Mabel, he
flipped the blanket off and sat up on the side of his bed.  Man, it’s a lot
chillier to be naked in this room at the end of December than it was at the end
of August , he mused as he scratched his scalp, and looked down at the
disarrayed contents of his suitcase for something to put on.
Something on Mabel’s bed caught Dipper’s eye. His bathrobe was already laid out
for him. As he rose and crossed the three steps to retrieve it, he glanced over
to the table between the beds to check the time. Besides seeing it was after
four in the morning, he also noticed a wrapped peanut butter and jelly
sandwich, a glass of water, and a Methadone tablet. He shook his head and
grinned as he pulled on the robe over his shivering body, then picked up a
sheet of paper that sat directly under the lamp. It was a note in Mabel’s
handwriting:
     Hey, sleepy Bro!
     You know, you’re an adorable dork every day, but you are SUPER
     ADORKABLES right now! All sweet and snuggly! You might be my stud
     muffin by day, but you’re my new fave teddy bear when you get all
     tired and droopy heeeeeee!
     I thought you might wake up needing some of this stuff later, so here
     you go. I made sure Grunkle Stan was already in bed when I went
     downstairs, cause it's gonna take both of us to get through that
     mega-awkward talk!
     Anywhooooo, I’m tired and cold. And since I see a nice little spot
     beside the bestest and warmest Broseph in the world, I think I just
     might squeeze back in there!
     XXOOXOXO
     I love you, Dipper!
     XXXXXXOOOOOO
     (I’m kissing and hugging you on paper cause I don’t want to wake you)

     XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
     (But I TOTALLY could wake you up anyways, cause you give big hugs and
     you’re are a GREAT KISSER eyebrow waggle ;-)
     XXXXXXXX OOXXXXXOO XXXOOOXXXXXX
     (OK I’m done now)
      X
      (Seriously that was the last one! G’night!!!!)
Dipper made a soft snort, and fondly gazed at Mabel again. He washed down the
medication quickly with a long drink of water, and quietly attacked the
sandwich. He knew he was awfully lucky to have such a thoughtful sister. After
a stealthy trip to the bathroom downstairs to empty his bladder and brush his
teeth, he felt much better and was ready to go back to sleep.
Turning off the lamp and removing his robe, he climbed back into his bed as
gingerly as he could. But the movement and noise was enough to rouse Mabel. She
made a cute moan as Dipper pulled the blankets back up, and he could barely
tell that her eyes blinked open for a moment as he tried to get comfortable.
“Sorry,” Dipper whispered. “Didn’t want to wake you.”
Mabel’s eyes drifted closed again. “S’okay,” she muttered sleepily. “Did’ja get
my note?”
Dipper leaned over and gently kissed her forehead. “Yeah. Thank you, that was
really nice,” he whispered back. He pecked her forehead softly again and
murmured “I love you,” and then started to settle his head on his pillow.
A pouty “Mmm!” noise came from the other pillow. Dipper grinned at Mabel’s
face, still looking asleep save for the protruding puckered-up lips, and
shifted back to the middle of the bed to kiss her lips sweetly. Mabel hummed
appreciatively and reached out her arms. “I wanna hug my squeezy bear!” she
mumbled.
It felt so natural, so  right , for Dipper to just slide up against Mabel’s
nude body and return the embrace. Their legs and arms instinctively found their
way around one another, and their mouths melted together again.
And then they weren't quite so sleepy anymore.
For the next half hour, no words were spoken. Nor were they needed. The twins
communicated everything they needed through soft gasps, quiet moans, and
intimate touches. As they tenderly made love, they reveled in how perfectly
they completed one another. They were two young siblings who, given their brief
life and extraordinary experiences together, couldn’t have felt any other way.
This time when Dipper fell back asleep in Mabel's arms, she did the same
moments later.
===============================================================================
Stan was slouched at the kitchen table in his customary undershirt and loose
jockeys, scratching himself distractedly while reading the latest edition of
the Gravity Falls Gossiper. It was late on Saturday morning, and although he
slept right through the night, he’d had to drag himself out of bed again.  I’m
always so damned tired!  he thought to himself.  This “getting old” business
stinks. Seventy years old next summer! The old bones and joints ache more every
day, it seems.  He reached for his mug of coffee and took a long sip.
His brief foray into self-pity was interrupted by the creaking sound of the
bottom step on the wooden staircase in the next room. He allowed the top of the
newspaper to droop as Dipper and Mabel tentatively appeared in the doorway of
the kitchen, dressed but looking disheveled. They were holding hands and
wearing very apprehensive expressions.
Then again, dealing with getting old is nothing compared to what these two have
been dealing with,  he mused.  And what they’ve chosen to still go through.  He
sighed loudly. “Alright, you two,” he said quietly, putting the paper aside.
“Come over here and sit down.”
The twins hesitantly stepped over the threshold and approached the table,
Dipper dragging a chair and placing it beside the one on the opposite side from
Stan. Then they wordlessly sat together, still gripping each other’s hand
tightly.
Stan regarded them soberly. “So .. no real need for me to tell you that I know
what went on with you kids last night,“ he muttered, avoiding making eye
contact. “It was pretty obvious all the way down here.” Dipper and Mabel both
flushed, their faces blooming a bright red.
He leaned forward, cringing but knowing this discussion was required. “More
important is what happens now. Are you planning to stay together when you go
back home again?” The silence continued, but both twins glanced at each other,
then back to their uncle and nodded, readjusting their grip on each other’s
hands. Stan grunted softly, shaking his head. “Jeez, kids. Do you know what
you’re getting yourselves into?”
“Umm … well-” Dipper said, then he swallowed nervously. “...yeah, we’ll … we
know that we can’t tell anyone about us, or anything … and …” His words trailed
off.
The silence hung over the room for several moments. Finally Stan said, “Of
course you won’t  tell  anyone. But if you think you’re going to keep going …”
he waved his hand back and forth at them, “...  together  … and think no one
will notice, you’re kidding yourselves!”
Dipper tried to summon bravado. “We can do it, we’re just … going to have to be
careful, that’s all!”
“Really?” Stan remarked, trying very hard to keep the sarcasm out of his tone.
“How well did that work when you went home a few months ago?”
Mabel spoke up. “That was different, Grunkle Stan! When we went back the first
time, we thought we were  done . We spent the whole bus ride home trying to get
ready for … being  normal  again.” Her shoulders fell. “But I couldn’t do it. I
couldn’t let go! I pushed and pushed, and … it all kind of went  thbbpthbpt! ”
she grumbled with a lackluster raspberry.
“It wasn’t just you,” Dipper said reassuringly. “I shouldn’t have handled
everything the way I did, either.” He paused to squeeze Mabel’s hand, and she
peered at him. “And you were  right!  I thought we could go back to the way we
were, or at least fool ourselves into thinking that way. Now I know we can’t.”
Mabel returned Dipper’s loving look, then he turned back to Stan. “We weren’t
on the same page, from the moment we returned home.”
“Yeah!” Mabel exclaimed. “When I just decided the night we got home that I
wasn’t going to let go, that I was going to try to keep us together … I didn’t
even  tell  Dipper! He just had to deal with me!”
“And I never really asked Mabel about how I made her feel when I shut
everything down after that,” Dipper added. “She thought I  meant  to break up
with her, that I  wanted  to stop! I made her feel like I wanted to stop loving
her!”
Mabel nodded. “We weren’t really good at the whole ‘communication’ thing, were
we?”
“No, not really,” Dipper agreed. “But now … we’re  talking  again!”
Stan considered this. “So you’re talking. Great. How is this going to keep
every single idiot in California from knowing you’re more than just siblings,
just by looking at the way you are together?”
“ You  see it because you already know!” cried Mabel. “Come on, Grunkle Stan,
you know that the Dipster and I have been been real weird close since the day
you met us! You said yourself last year that it was unnatural for us to get
along as well as we do. Everyone already  knows  that about us!” She held up
their joined hands. “Seriously, we held hands  all the time , even before we
fell in love! What brother and sister  does  that?” Dipper snorted as Mabel
continued. “Trust me, everyone in Piedmont has probably been trying to figure
out what’s happening between us  because we haven’t  been doin’ the Twin Thing
for the past few months! But now all we have to do is, you know ...  tone it
down  a little, and I bet no one who knows us will think anything other than
we’re back to the way we used to be!”
Dipper added his free hand, gripping Mabel’s hand with both of his own. “And we
know we have to meet in the middle on how  we  react to this. I get really
scared by even the smallest chance that we’ll get caught. I have to accept …
that I have to  risk  a little sometimes to get what we need.”
“And  I  need to not be running my engines on full ‘impulse’ all the time!”
Mabel piped in, adding her extra hand to their shared grip. “I can’t be rolling
the dice like I’ve been doing.”
“But what if you both can’t do that?” Stan argued. “The way you behave isn’t
easy to change, and you could fall back to your old ways. Or what if, for
whatever reason, your feelings change? You’re young! Kids have always fallen in
love, and then they fall  out  of love, and it could happen to you, too.” The
twins glared at their uncle with decidedly unpleasant expressions. “I’m  not
saying it will happen, only that it  might!  Normally, teenagers just move on
from a breakup, but you’ll have to still live together and be a family. Are you
prepared for that?”
Mabel’s defiant scowl instantly transformed into determination, and she turned
in her chair to face her brother. “Dipper, I promise you now,  nothing  will
make me ever break our bond. Even-” She stopped and winced as she closed her
eyes and forced herself to imagine Dipper in a relationship with another girl.
“... Even if you’re with someone else … I will be the  best  sister ever!” she
said with tight conviction.
Dipper gripped her hands tighter. “Mabel, we’re twins, and we  always  will
be!” he said easily and sincerely. “I don’t care if the way you feel about me
could ever change, it won’t ever matter. I will love you in every way you need
me to, no matter what!” He smiled at his sister supportively, and they leaned
closer together.
Stan tried to appraise the situation without feelings. His fondness for his
niece and nephew would only get in the way of him being able to examine their
situation objectively, he knew. They had to examine every consequence of their
decision, and sentiment on his part would only get in the way.
But damnit, it’s hard to be dispassionate when they’re sitting there like
they’ve got no choice but to do everything possible to be together. And I
BELIEVE them!
He exhaled loudly. “Okay, kids.  This  is the tough question.” He waited a beat
as they turned to focus on him, then pulled a deep breath back in. “If you do
this … despite your best efforts, there’s a real chance someone other than me
is going to find out about the way you both feel, and that gets back to your
parents.” He looked directly at Mabel, who couldn’t hide signs of a fearful
look. Then his gaze fell on Dipper, and he saw an oddly detached expression.
“Are you sure you want to chance that? Do I have to spell out how bad that
would be for both of you?”
Dipper didn’t hesitate. “That’s  not  going to happen,” he replied tightly.
Stan blinked. Dipper was the most notorious planner of contingencies he knew.
How could he not have thought this part through?  “Uh, yeah, it could!” he
retorted. “And if it does, you’d better have an idea of how you’ll handle it.”
“No I don’t,” Dipper countered in a quiet determined grumble. “It’s
unnecessary, and it won’t make any difference.”
Mabel peered at her brother with curious concern. She understood that Dipper
believed their relationship together was safe, and that his newfound faith was
instrumental to this belief. But Stan didn’t know that! And she thought his
reaction to Stan’s question sounded way too defensive.
“Kid, there’s any number of-”
“ I don’t care! ” Dipper interrupted loudly, an almost furious energy suddenly
erupting from within him. He leapt to his feet, his chair clattering to the
floor behind him. “We  won’t  be found out!”
A startled Mabel jumped up to Dipper’s side, grabbing his arm. “Dip, what the
heck? Grunkle Stan’s only trying to  help  us!” She turned to her uncle. “I’ll
explain! Last night, Dipper told me abou-”
“ Mabel! ” Dipper barked sharply. Mabel cowered slightly at the rebuke, and
Dipper was immediately regretful. “I’m … I’m sorry, Mabel! It’s just that …” he
lowered his voice imperceptibly, “... that’s not really important,” silently
pleading to Mabel that she not tell Stan of his religious revelation. She
didn’t get why, but she nodded back in understanding.
Dipper reluctantly turned his head to his uncomprehending uncle. “Sorry, I … I
really appreciate that you’re keeping our secret, Grunkle Stan, and making us
talk this through. And I  know  I’m ignoring what would happen.” He flinched in
frustration. “But I really  can’t  think about that! I  know  that if anyone
else finds out, it’s all over! If anyone finds out, there is absolutely
nothing  that I could do that would fix it!” His jaw set. “And that’s exactly
why it  won’t  happen! It  can’t!!  We might not be allowed to be as free and
open about how we feel as we want to. But Mabel and I  need  to be together,
and we  will! ”
Stan regarded the resolute face of his nephew for several heartbeats. He could
see that Dipper knew the risks, understood the consequences, and was completely
prepared to go forward regardless. Arguing the point further was pointless. He
just wished he knew what caused this almost reckless shift in Dipper’s
personality, to seemingly act all of a sudden with his heart instead of his
head, but he was unwilling to talk about it. A quick glance at Mabel told Stan
that she was in agreement with her brother, but that was no surprise.
He raised his hands. “Alright alright! Just cool down and sit, okay?” he
exclaimed, trying to change the subject. Mabel perched herself immediately
while Dipper righted his chair and sat back down while taking a calming breath.
“Let’s say I believe all that,” he declared. “All the wishing in the world
won’t stop you from being discovered if you two aren’t careful in another way.”
He glanced sternly back and forth between the teens. “What did you use last
night for protection?”
A decidedly guilty and sheepish look immediately formed on the twins’ faces.
Stan grunted. “Yeah, I figured that. What have you used before?”
Mabel reddened in embarrassment, and Dipper appeared to be fixated on a note
stuck to the refrigerator door. “We … kind of .... never have,” Mabel mumbled
under her breath.
Sighing heavily, Stan lowered his forehead into his palm and shook his head
slowly. “Sonofabitch …” he muttered. “And here I’ve always thought you two were
smart!” He glared at them, genuinely feeling anger and disappointment in them
for the first time. “You are both  damn  lucky Mabel never got pregnant in
September. And if you’re  really  lucky, nothing will come from last night
either!”
Mabel meekly tried to argue. “Actually, it’s not that time of the month fo-”
“You can get pregnant  any  time of the month, in the right circumstances! Even
I  know that!” Stan fired back. The twins shrank in their seats. “I might not
be able to convince you two that this relationship you have is crazy, but I’m
damn well  going to get through to you on this!” Stan pointed directly at
Dipper. “You will  keep it in your pants  unless you’re using birth control!
Got it?! ”
Dipper gulped. “Yes, Grunkle Stan,” he replied shakily.
Then he pointed at Mabel. “And same for you! You’d better not think you know
every little thing about your body.  Lots  of girls more careful than you have
still ended up with babies. I’m thinking you don’t want that?”
“No, Grunkle Stan!” came Mabel’s squeaky, frightened reply.
“Good!” Stan snapped, then examined his niece and nephew’s almost terrified
expressions. They’d never looked at him like that before.
He shoved his chair back and stood quickly, aware that he needed to cool down.
He paced the floor back and forth as he spoke again. “Look, here’s the deal!
You two knuckleheads have already made things really hard for yourselves with
what you’re doing. I just-” He exhaled heavily. “... I just don’t want you to
add any  more  to your plate!”
Then he stopped in front of them and gingerly knelt down to one knee, so that
he wasn’t looking down on them. “But regardless of anything, no matter what
happens … the Shack is a safe place for you.” Mabel instantly began to tear up,
and Dipper bit his lip. Stan even felt something catch in his own chest. “If
you ever need help, you can  always  come here. No questions, no judgement. You
got that?”
Mabel hurled herself past Dipper into Stan’s chest, weeping freely as Stan’s
right arm held her tight. Dipper slid off of his chair and joined them, easing
into Stan’s left side. He buried his head quietly but solidly into the old
man’s shoulder. Stan felt the boy’s body shudder from barely contained sobs.
===============================================================================
It was late in the morning, and brunch was a welcome relief after the intense
talk. Stan suggested they make a batch of his famous Stancakes, and the kids
happily agreed. The twins consumed most of the entire stack by themselves, as
they were both very hungry.
Stan announced that a trip into town was in order. There were more groceries to
buy than usual due to having two growing kids in the Shack for another week,
and he needed to stock up. Also, there were “family planning” products that had
to be procured. Stan took pity on Dipper and Mabel as he realized how
embarrassing (and potentially dangerous) it would be for either of the
teenagers to buy condoms in a small town where they were so well known.
Instead, he volunteered to go and get them himself. Sure, he’d get some strange
looks at the drugstore instead, but it wouldn’t be the weirdest thing anyone
had seen him do since he arrived in town over three decades before.
After he had finished eating and gotten dressed, and following a quick and
stern reminder for the twins to restrain themselves, Stan stepped out into the
cold winter air, headed for his beloved Stanmobile.
As soon as the old sedan left the driveway, Mabel declared that Dipper was
stinky and needed a shower right away. And in the interests of “saving water”,
she insisted that she join him.
They took their time undressing each other again, both of them once again
feeling the wonderful rush that accompanies young sexuality. They managed to
eventually make their way into the old clawfoot tub, caressing and kissing one
another the entire time. The water took several seconds to warm up, triggering
a brief outburst of shrieking and silly shouts, but soon after they were
playfully and seductively washing one another’s bodies. They took turns rinsing
under the showerhead, giggling each time they almost lost their balance trying
to maneuver their way past the other in the narrow tub, groping and tickling
each other every time. As he turned off the water, Dipper noted with a smirk
that the shower had taken longer than the combined time it would have taken
them separately. Mabel nonetheless loudly declared the experiment a victory for
the environment as she squeezed excess water out of her long hair, then pulled
the curtain open.
This was when they discovered that in their haste to enjoy their time alone,
they had forgotten to bring down towels or robes from their room upstairs.
Rather than put their dirty clothes back on, Mabel grinned naughtily, grabbed
Dipper’s hand, and pulled him out of the bathroom naked. With Mabel in the
lead, they streaked soaking wet from the bathroom, detouring through every room
in the building, and finally up the stairs to the attic, giggling the whole
way. The air was cold, but they were still laughing as they located towels and
started buffing themselves dry even as their teeth began chattering.
Mabel was mostly dry but shivering when she dove under the covers on her bed.
“C’mere!” she shrieked. “I need you to help me get warm!”
Dipper tilted his head and smiled shyly as he kept scrubbing his legs.
“Mabellllllll,” he complained. “If I get in there with you, we’re gonna want to
… you know!” He blushed, despite the chill. “We can’t … you know …  do  that
for now…”
“Oh, tish tosh!” Mabel scolded, gesturing him with her arm vigorously while
holding up the blanket with the other. “We just don’t give into it! Get a grip
on those hormones and get  over  here, man! You’ve got serious boyfriendly
duties, and you’re falling down on the job!”
The will to resist was immediately gone, and Dipper scrambled beneath the
offered sheets. Their skin was still clammy, and they squealed and growled
delightedly as they wrestled and squirmed against each other like silly
puppies. The bed’s sheets became twisted in the scuffle, but the young
combatants didn’t care. Soon all the bed coverings and pillows were strewn
randomly on the floor, with two aroused and naked teens still fighting for
dominance.
Finally Mabel managed to grab both of Dipper’s wrists, and with a triumphant
yell she forced Dipper down on his back with his arms pinned to the mattress on
either side of his head, and she clambered on top of him to hold his entire
body down. Her face was inches away from his, wet hair cascading around them,
as they grinned and panted happily.
Still gasping for breath and keeping her weight on Dipper’s arms, she leaned
down and kissed him passionately. Allowing himself to be immobilized, Dipper
strained to lift his neck and push into the kiss. Mabel’s legs were astride
Dipper’s hips, and their bodies naturally began rubbing against each other. The
delicious friction of Dipper’s skin rubbing against Mabel’s drove her to gyrate
harder and faster.
Any temporary shrinkage caused by the cold that Dipper may have been suffering
from was now firmly in the past. Dipper moaned loudly into Mabel’s mouth as she
used long pelvic thrusts to drag his erect shaft up and down her sex.
Dipper broke the kiss, his eyes wild with desire. “Mabes!” he gasped. “... We
can’t … We promised Stan-”
“We promised Stan … that we can’t do anything … that might make me pregnant,”
Mabel panted, continuing to grind herself steadily against her lover. Her
movements slowed, and she gazed at him adoringly. “There are  other  ways to do
this,” she whispered, followed by a quick, hard kiss on the mouth. Then she
released Dipper’s wrists and began sliding her way down. Peppering his chin,
throat, neck, chest, and stomach with short kisses, causing Dipper to giggle
and squirm with ticklishness.
As she passed his belly button and continued to work her way down, he felt her
palm grasp his penis and it finally dawned on Dipper’s frazzled brain where
Mabel was headed. At once his hands were at the sides of her head, gently but
firmly insisting that she stop.
“Mabel …” he stammered, “... you don’t … you know, have to! I’m ...”
She looked at him with a coquettish smirk. “I know I don’t  have  to,dum-dum!”
Her grin spread wider. “It’s myyyyyyyyyy pleasure!” She swirled her tongue
tantalizingly around her lips as she gripped harder and pulled on his erection.
Dipper sucked in a breath from the stimulation, but pressed on. “No Mabel,
really!” he said, a little louder. “That last time you did … I didn’t mean for
it happen like tha-”
“Seriously, Brobro!  Ancient  history! Fuggetaboutit!” Mabel replied easily
with a seductive smile. She resumed her task of jacking Dipper steadily and
tilted her chin down, sticking her tongue into his navel and subtly pulling
against Dipper’s grip on her head.
But Dipper couldn’t just allow the subject to drop. “Mabel,  I’m  serious!” he
cried. “You don’t … I don’t want you to have to do this …” He battled against
tears, caused by the bitter memories of the first Wednesday after their return
to California in the fall. “I mean last time I … when I  forced  myself on you
an-”
“Oh, no … no no Dipper!” Mabel interjected, all pretense of sexiness gone in
the blink of an eye, replaced by loving concern. “No, no you didn’t mean to
force  anything! ” She looked away for a second. “Yeah, it  felt  that way, and
it wasn’t fun, but ... I don’t blame you anymore.” She pulled her body up as
she spoke so that her chin rested on Dipper’s breast bone. “Honest! I haven't
for a long time now. And truth is, I could’ve stopped you, and I know you
would’ve stopped, but … I got all frozen up and stuff.” She shrugged, trying to
be dismissive. “It  happened!  But it’s done. And I don’t want it to be a thing
anymore.”
Dipper said nothing, obviously still upset and unsure. Crawling further up so
that her eyes were looking down directly into his, Mabel placed her free hand
on his cheek. “Hey!” she whispered with a sweet smile. “I  know  you’re sorry,
so ... please don’t beat yourself up about it!” She gently kissed his lips. “I
forgive you.”
A shuddering breath escaped Dipper’s lungs, and he wiped his face quickly. “I’m
sorry!” he said quickly after an unsteady gasp. “It’s just … I guess we’ve
never even mentioned any of this since that big fight, have we?”
Mabel shook her head sadly. “We have a lot of catching up to do.” She ran her
fingers through Dipper’s tousled hair affectionately. “It’s really sweet of you
to be all concerned about it. But I really am over it!” She lightly pecked his
nose. “And I love you,” she said softly, kissing his lips slowly and lovingly.
After their mouths parted with a quiet smack, Dipper gazed up at Mabel with
grateful adoration. She smiled back warmly. “You okay now?”
“Yeah!” Dipper murmured back, relieved.
“Good!” Mabel replied suavely with a suggestive grin, eyebrows waggling
dramatically. She again began stroking Dipper's length, and he gasped. She
slithered her way back down his body, kissing his skin along the way before
pausing again at his belly button. She looked up, and this time instead of
resistance, Mabel got a look of awed anticipation from her brother. She flashed
a delighted, crafty smile and a huge wink at him while extending her tongue
into his cute tummy hole. She was rewarded with another sharp intake of breath,
and her hand felt his penis jerk with renewed vigor. “Hmmmmmmm!” she purred. “I
count  two  Dipsticks who seem to like what I’m doing!”
The shuddering exhale she got in reponse was an adorable combination of
horniness and amused exasperation. Mabel giggled, quickly blew a kiss, and then
scooted the rest of the way down to the bottom of bed. She hunched down on her
knees between Dipper’s shaking legs, still focussing intently on his wide eyes.
Finally, she lowered her attention to her target.
Dipper’s penis wasn’t exactly a stranger to Mabel, but she wasn’t terribly
familiar with it up close, either. On their birthday in Portland and the week
that had followed, they’d made love many times, trying a few different
positions for intercourse. Dipper also proved to be very naturally skilled at
going down on Mabel. But for whatever reasons, Mabel’s experience with orally
pleasuring Dipper was limited to only a few unsatisfactory attempts. And this
was to be her first time trying it since the disastrous evening in early
September, the day their new relationship together was nearly destroyed.
Dipper’s unintentional actions had left Mabel feeling horribly violated. Now
months later, his member was directly in front of Mabel’s mouth again.
And despite her assurances to Dipper moments before, she was not  nearly  as
confident as she was trying to appear to be.
I’ll just get through this,  she thought determinedly, not letting her worry
affect her smiling facial muscles.  I’m not going to let these dumb fears get
in the way of our relationship!
Slowly, tantalizingly, Mabel puckered her lips and kissed the hooded knob,
hearing a small gasp from Dipper. She tilted her head and kissed her way down
his shaft on one side, placed a little peck on the ballsack, and then up the
other side. She could have sworn that it looked a bit longer than in September,
and maybe a touch thicker, too.  Well of course, we’re both still growing,  she
thought, and obliquely wondered how big he would get. She continued to give
attention to his length up and down, finishing with a collection of kisses
right on the sensitive tip.
I’ll force myself to do this, and it’ll make Dipper happy! He has to like it.
They say every guy likes it!
Sticking out her tongue, she gave the foreskin a lick, then another. She ducked
her head and drew her tongue up from the base of the shaft all the way to the
tip, like it was a popsicle. A soft groan came from above.  Well I’m doing
something right,  she thought, repeating the motion. She crawled higher to
enable access to either side of Dipper’s manhood, bathing the shaft in her
saliva as she went.  His curly hair has grown in thicker , she noticed as she
continued to lap attention on every part of the organ.
When Dipper uses his mouth on me, it feels so wonderful! It’s only fair I do it
for him in return. It’s worth it to do this for him, to pleasure him. He
deserves to feel good.
Mabel opened her mouth wide, remembering to tuck her lips over her teeth, and
lowered her mouth over the head of the penis. Taking a deep breath through her
nose, she pushed down further.  It’s not gross, it’s just skin,  she thought.
We just got out of the shower, so nothing is dirty about it.  Running her
tongue over the underside of the pole, she took as much as she could until his
tip touched her tonsils.  Gag reflex! Gag reflex!  she panicked, then backed
off quickly before her throat could convulse. Raising her head back up, Mabel
directed some more saliva to the cause of lubrication, then went back down
again.
Dipper won`t ever hurt me again. He’ll always be careful from now on, so it’ll
be fine! And it’s really not so bad! I can totally see getting used to this.
Eventually. Just gotta keep this smile on my face every time I pull off!
Gradually Mabel became more proficient at the skill of applying suction while
withdrawing, and swirling with her tongue and lips as she pushed in.  It’s like
copying the way my hand strokes him, only wetter,  she pondered.  I bet it
feels really good for him. At least I hope it does!
Over the next few minutes, she increased the speed of her motions, adding one
hand to the action.  Man, my jaw and neck are getting kinda sore!  she thought.
He should be close by now, shouldn’t he?  Mabel slowed and lifted up, not quite
pulling entirely off. She closed her lips around the head, forced the corners
of her mouth up, and peered up to see how well Dipper was enjoying himself.
Dipper looked back at her, but it was not with a face she expected. There was
no desire, no excitement in his expression. Instead, she saw …  worry!  And
this made Mabel also realize that over the last few minutes he hadn’t been
squirming or twitching with delight like he normally did when he was all worked
up. Nor had he been making his cute aroused noises.
He knows! Mabel thought. Against her will, her eyes widened and her smile fell.
This was immediate confirmation for Dipper, and the muscles on his face
instantly communicated to Mabel how he felt about her: intense sympathy,
concern, protectiveness, even despair.  He knows I’m not liking this!  she
thought.  He’s upset!  He shifted his arms, preparing to raise himself and sit
up. He was undoubtedly going to stop her.
But this isn’t Dipper’s fault! He’s going to blame himself again! No, no. Poor
Dip! The big goober, he can’t go through this again. I love him too much … too
much to let him feel like that again! Quick, I need to let him know that this
isn’t about him! I need him to know I LOVE him! Right now, Mabel! RIGHT
BLEEPING NOW!!
These thoughts flashed through Mabel’s mind in a split second. In any normal
circumstance, acting on her frantic urge to communicate her love to Dipper
would have resulted in her flinging her arms around him while babbling any
words of love and devotion that came to mind.
But this was not a normal circumstance, because at that moment her arms were
wrapped around Dipper’s thighs, and the inside of her mouth was occupied by his
penis.
Mabel’s instincts could not be suppressed, her need to prove to Dipper her
powerful feelings for him would not be delayed. Her arms squeezed his legs
tightly. Then as her eyes fluttered closed, a soft high-pitched sigh escaped as
her mouth melted smoothly and tightly around his length, as if she were hugging
and kissing all of him.
The reaction from Dipper was immediate. He groaned and gasped, and she felt his
hips jerk slightly.
Oh, that’s better!  thought Mabel with relief. She was desperate to feel it
again,  needed  to feel that Dipper knew how much he was loved. Without another
thought, she pulled her head back and repeated the passionate embrace and
massage of his penis with her mouth, accompanied by a louder noise of growing
happiness. Dipper’s moan was also louder, his pelvic thrust more pronounced His
arms gave out, and he fell back to the mattress.
Oooooohh, yes that’s SO much better! Why is this so different now? What
changed?  This was now so natural, where just a moment ago it had felt
uncomfortable. She hadn’t been herself before as she tried to please Dipper,
she knew. It was like she was … a different person!
I was wearing my Mabel mask again!  she realized. Mabel hadn’t consciously worn
her “Mabel mask” for some time, not since the night she’d become furious with
Dipper when he’d broken off their relationship the first time. It was a shield
that she imagined for herself that she used to wear when she had to act the way
others expected, the way she thought others wanted. When her true feelings had
to remain hidden. Being in the role of wearing the mask had always felt tiring
and stressful. It had caused her attempts to please Dipper to be dull,
procedural, and soulless.
But now she knew that Dipper didn’t want the mask. He didn’t want her to do
anything she didn’t want to do. Dipper wanted  her!  The  real  Mabel! He was
obviously  very  turned on by what the real Mabel was doing!
And to her joy, she now realized the real Mabel was free of any fear or
apprehension of Dipper, and of anything that had happened before. There was
nothing to fear about loving him any way they pleased! Dipper loved her
completely, and she loved him just as much in return. She truly  wanted  to do
this for him!
With the barricades finally removed from her mind, Mabel had no thoughts of
steeling herself, and dismissed any dumb “techniques” for oral stimulation.
Sighing and whimpering with desire and love, she just let go and made love to
Dipper, using her mouth.
For his part, Dipper didn’t know what caused the change in Mabel. He knew her
better than anyone, and had suspected she was not comfortable with what she was
doing. But whatever happened when he began to sit up, the difference was
incredible! In a matter of seconds, his sister had somehow subtly switched from
performing a cold and clinical blowjob, to something that may have looked
pretty much the same, but  felt  mind-blowingly more erotic and passionate.
This was not acting. This was  genuine!  Dipper knew Mabel’s heart and soul
were into doing this for him now.
He had no control over the increasing volume and pitch of the groans he made
with every labored breath. While her tongue, lips, soft palate, and even
occasional brushes of teeth attacked his straining erection with delicious
physical stimulation, he was emotionally toppled over by waves of love and
empathy that somehow emanated from her.
Mabel adored every bit of her lover's helplessly aroused state.  These cute
little balls look so lonely!  she gleefully thought, and like magic her
fingertips were caressing the soft skin of the scrotum.
The combination of Mabel's mouth and the sensual tickling caused a convulsion
in Dipper's lower body. His hips thrusted strongly in sync with his knees
bending and straightening repeatedly, and his groans sounded like exquisite
agony.
Suddenly Dipper was gasping rapidly. He gaped down with eyes huge from enormous
sensations. “Oh  shit! ” he cried hoarsely. “ Mabes!!”
For an instant, Mabel stopped and glanced up, a beautiful and unmistakably
sincere smile somehow visible despite the fact her mouth was stuffed. Time
stood still as their gazes locked, Dipper’s in shocked ecstasy, Mabel’s in
total satisfaction. She felt his erection grow harder and thicker, quivering
with built-up strain, and her fingers felt his testes pull up close to his
body. Then she let her eyes close in contentment, engulfed Dipper’s penis
deeply, and sucked and licked as hard as she could.
Dipper winced loudly in agonizing pleasure. His entire body went completely
rigid as his penis erupted, projecting the first of several powerful spurts of
warm semen into Mabel’s welcoming mouth.
The force and volume of the stream surprised Mabel, but she kept her lips
sealed tight and pistoned the shaft one last time, slowly but firmly. More of
the thick, salty fluid was firing into the back of her throat, and she relaxed
her cheeks as her mouth quickly started to fill. Dipper cried out desperately,
finally able to take a breath after three strong shots, and the adorableness of
the sound almost made Mabel choke as she struggled to not laugh in delight.
The contractions quickly grew weaker in Mabel’s mouth, the pulses further
apart, until she knew there would be no more seed to come. Carefully she pulled
off and sat up on her knees, gathering her precious cargo on her tongue and in
her cheeks. As she swished the viscous fluid around experimentally, she looked
down to see her panting brother watching her in amazement.
Dipper’s expression grew even more disbelieving when, with a saucy wink, Mabel
swallowed the entire sticky load down in one gulp. “MMMMMMmmmmmmm MM? ” she
hummed, taking a few deep breaths and smacking her lips. “That’s … not really
all that bad!” she proclaimed matter-of-factly. Dipper could only gape dumbly.
Mabel stroked his trembling thighs down to his knees. The saucy look spread to
Mabel’s entire face. “I loved that,” she purred, “just like I love you.”
Struggling to regain his poise, Dipper weakly held Mabel’s hip in one palm and
her face in the other as she leaned forward to her hands and knees over his
stomach. “Ohmygod …” Dipper gasped, “... Mabel … I  love  you, too! …that was
amazing!  … ” Mabel hummed appreciatively and settled herself lower, holding
herself up over her brother’s heaving chest, their skin brushing lightly across
each other. “… But oh man … I can’t believe … you  swallowed  that!”
Mabel shrugged and crawled forward, sliding herself down to Dipper’s side. “It
was no biggie!” she said smiling, snuggling in. “Can’t have you leaving your
stuff all over my bed, can I Bro?” Dipper looked doubtful, and Mabel just had
to mess with him. “Hey, I’ll have you know I’ve tasted and eaten a  lot  of
weird stuff, man!” she stated proudly. “Dust, hair, bugs … stuff  way  jankier
than your Hot Dippin’ Sauce!”
His incredulity at Mabel’s pun made Dipper blush, but he still couldn’t help
but laugh. “Mabel!” he chuckled.
She pecked his temple. “But seriously, the taste was … just really  different ,
okay? It was hot, and salty … a little sweet ... and kind of thick …” Mabel
paused for a moment, then focused with a smug grin on dorky lover, “... kind of
like  you!  That’s how I’ll describe it! Your Dippin’ Sauce tastes like
Dipper!”
Dipper groaned pitifully, closing his eyes and knowing it wouldn’t be the last
time he would be told how his semen tasted. Mabel cackled with joy and kissed
him on the cheek. He smiled and tilted his head. She obliged the unspoken
request and kissed him again, this time on the mouth.
As their lips slowly parted after the long and gentle kiss, Dipper’s face had
fallen. He touched Mabel’s cheek. “Are you sure you’re okay?” he whispered.
“You said you were over it, but … you weren’t! I could tell. Why didn’t you
want me to know how hard that was going to be for you?”
Mabel half-smiled in sympathy. “Because of  you , dummy!” she whispered back.
“I knew you’d never let me try it again if you didn’t think I was okay. And I
really  did  want to do it again, to prove to myself I could get over it.” Her
smile bloomed to cover her entire face. “And as soon as I stopped thinking of
your thing as a  thing , and that it was just  you  …” she shrugged happily,
“... ka-POOF!! End of brain cramp! I really  did  get over it!”
“You’re sure?” Dipper asked, considerate and cautious as ever.
“I’m sure,” she replied quietly. “It’ll never be hard for me again.” Another
snarky grin formed on her face, and she fingerwalked her hand across Dipper’s
skin down to his groin. “Unlike  this  …” she teased, grabbing her brother’s
deflated tool, making him snort uncontrollably, “... which I demand be hard for
me as much as possible!”
Dipper squirmed and laughed even harder, begging Mabel to stop tickling him.
When he finally had his breathing back under control, he rolled over on top of
his lover, kissing and nuzzling her all over her face and neck while caressing
her arms, ribs, and breasts with his hands. She enjoyed the attention, relaxing
and humming at the wonderful feeling of Dipper’s warm skin and soft lips all
over her. Her breath caught when he moved down and took one of her nipples into
his mouth, and she whined with increasing desire as he lavished the attention
of his mouth on both of her breasts.
But when Dipper’s tongue dropped down to Mabel’s stomach, she felt her
apprehension to where this was leading, similar to her brother’s concerns
earlier. “Dipper …” she pleaded goofily, holding his hair to keep him still.
“Seriously?” said Dipper, legitimately confused. “C’mon, I  want  to do this
for you!”
Mabel reddened. “I know, but … maybe you should … just wait until …” Her voiced
trailed off, clearly embarrassed to explain further.
Dipper’s confounded face made it clear he didn’t understand what the problem
was, forcing Mabel to reluctantly go on. “It’s been a pretty long time since
I’ve … you know ... “ she blushed again, “...  trimmed the hedges , so to speak
…”
Understanding flashed across Dipper’s face, followed by more confusion. “Wait,
what … is that  it?  That’s  all  that’s bothering you?”
“Well … yeah …cause I was feelin’ all poopy the last few months, I didn’t feel
like doing the shaving thing,” she whined. “And now … it’s a real big garden of
flipping dental floss down there!”
“Pfft! Mabel, I don’t care about that!” Dipper said with easy dismissal. “Every
part of you is perfect! You look beautiful, you  feel  beautiful …”  a sneaky
finger had found its way lower down and started lazily tracing down Mabel’s
outer lips, making Mabel gasp, “... and I want to make sure you still  taste
beautiful!” He smiled bashfully. “Please?”
Mabel couldn’t help but melt for her brother’s sappy brand of sexy. Her hands
lost their will to hold Dipper’s hair, and her legs parted easily.
===============================================================================
“Leapin’ Leggy P. in a Pod! ” Mabel gasped heavily, brushing a lock of her hair
away from her sweat-soaked forehead. “You got a totally talented tongue, young
man!”
Dipper crawled up to Mabel’s side, his mouth tired and wet but smiling in
happiness. “It was my pleasure, m’lady!”
Mabel threw her arms around Dipper as he collapsed beside her, and they held
each other tightly as they shared another long, passionate kiss. Her breathing
slowly returned to normal, and they relaxed in each other’s arms, their noses
touching, gazing lovingly at one another.
“I love you,” they both murmured in unison, triggering twin smiles of
contentment. Then they pulled each other even closer, pressed their cheeks
together, and squeezed with their entire bodies as hard as they could. They
both loved the closeness they felt from sharing their “not-so-awkward-sibling-
hug” together.
After they finally released their grip on each other, Mabel shivered. “I kinda
forgot how  cold  it is up here,” she said, leaning over to grab a blanket off
the floor. Pulling it up over them, she fell back next to Dipper and snuggled.
“I need warming up!”
“I think this is how we got started!” Dipper snickered, but returned the
snuggle regardless. “But really, we can’t stay here like this too much longer.
Stan’s probably going to be back any time now.”
They hugged quietly for a long moment. Then Mabel broke the silence. “Dipper?”
“Hmm?” Dipper grunted back easily.
Mabel paused for a heartbeat, then continued carefully. “Why did you cut me off
when I was going to explain to Grunkle Stan about your … belief? That God will
let us stay together?”
Dipper tensed, then relaxed again. “Oh … that,” he mumbled. “I don’t know … you
know how Stan is, he doesn’t believe in anything. I just …” He shrugged,
looking down. “... I just know he wouldn’t understand. I’m not sure that  I
understand! It was … I guess it’s just easier to not have to try to explain it
to him, that’s all,” he finished morosely.
“He’s the only one who knows about us, Dipper,” Mabel said softly. “He may not
like everything that we’ve done, but he’s supported us through all of this.”
She ran her fingers through Dipper’s hair. “He loves us! And he knows
everything else. Why not tell him this?”
“I know he loves us, but … he already thinks I’m weird, Mabel!” he grumbled
defensively. “I’m a scrawny, weak little nerd, and I’m in love with my sister!
And you want him to find out that I believe that the Flying Spaghetti Monster
is protecting us from anyone finding out about us?” Dipper rolled over onto his
back. “I just think this would make me look even worse.”
Mabel was saddened to see Dipper’s feelings of inferiority, and believed that
Stan could help him with that. She decided to try one more time. “I don’t … I
don’t want to have to lie to him, that’s all,” she said quietly.
Dipper exhaled impatiently. “You don’t have to  lie , Mabel, you just … don’t
have to explain everything, either. If he wants to hear more, let me handle it.
I’ll think of something that will satisfy him.” He looked at her directly.
“C’mon, please?”
She reluctantly nodded, and Dipper hugged her. She returned the hug, but he
felt a split-second hesitation, and he released her. “What’s wrong?” he asked.
Mabel bit her lip. “Nothing’s wrong.”
Dipper squinted. “Mabel?” he asked more seriously.
Huffing in frustration, Mabel sat up and swiped at the wetness that formed in
her eyes. “How do you always know when I’m being a crybaby?”
“Cause I know you better than anyone,” Dipper replied quickly, sitting up
beside Mabel and placing his hand on her leg. “Now ... what did I do? Did I say
something wrong?”
“No,” Mabel said timidly. “Just … I just got scared for a second, that’s all.”
Dipper gripped his sister’s shoulders and leaned close to her face. “Tell me …
please.”
Mabel waved her hand. “It was just a dumb thought that crossed my mind. Forget
it!”
But Dipper remained in front of Mabel, holding her tight, not letting her drop
the subject. Giving in, she drew a deep breath. “It was just that you don’t
want to tell Grunkle Stan everything … and that it seems so easy for you  … I
thought …” she took another unsteady breath, “... I just wondered if you could
ever do that … if you could ever lie like that … to  me! ” she whimpered as a
tear rolled down her cheek.
“Oh Mabel no!” Dipper gasped. Looking like he’d been punched in the stomach, he
lunged to Mabel’s mouth and kissed her franticly, a sob gathering in his chest
until he couldn’t hold it in any longer. The cry burst out and he held her
tightly. “Oh God, Mabel … I would  never  do that to you!” he wept. “You’re the
only one on earth that … that I could  never  lie to!” He squeezed even
tighter, burying his face in his lover’s neck. “Please … you have to believe
me, Mabel!” he sobbed quietly.
Hearing and feeling Dipper’s despair easily pulled Mabel from her doubts. She
cursed her feelings, making her think that her soulmate would be ever be
capable of betraying her. She cried openly now, but in relief instead of worry.
“Ah Dipper, I  do  believe you! I’m such a jerky jerkface!” she sobbed as she
hugged back. “I love you! I’m so sorry!”
“I love you too,” Dipper whispered. “I love you … so much!”
The cold air didn’t matter any longer. All that mattered was comforting and
being there for each other. For several minutes, the twins just held each other
securely. They felt like they could have remained there all day.
But the sound of a car pulling up the driveway outside signalled that Stan had
returned from town. Suddenly they realized that neither of them wanted their
uncle to find them naked together in bed. They giggled awkwardly and bolted off
the bed to locate clean clothes, dressed quickly, and hurried down the stairs
before Stan reached the door.
===============================================================================
 
***** Chapter 14 *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
===============================================================================
The following week was a bit like deja vu for the twins. Much like their final
week of summer, they were together, happy, and on the same page, sharing all of
their remaining time at Gravity Falls before boarding a bus for California. And
in one significant way it was even better, because this time the twins didn’t
have to be careful about masking their emotions around the Shack. There were no
tourists, Soos and Wendy were not around, and of course Stan knew of their
affair. Not that he tolerated overt displays of affection while he was around,
but at least they didn’t need to be afraid of being overheard making suspicious
noises, or being observed giving one another fond looks and little touches.
Their uncle understood their desire to enjoy their temporary freedom, but he
also encouraged the young couple to not get too accustomed to it. They could be
getting into bad habits, and little hints would quickly expose them if they
weren’t careful. Drawing on his own broad experience in deceiving people, Stan
likened the outward appearance of their relationship to a “long con”, and
coached the twins on needing to train themselves to have a practiced facade
that hid their true feelings for one another. Mabel bemoaned that she had to go
back to wearing her Mabel Mask again. Stan did admit to her that everyone
else’s knowledge of their historically close dynamic would cover up many
suspicions. Still, there were definitely limits to what they could get away
with if they only “toned down” their actions.
The kids also begrudgingly saw the wisdom of not getting used to falling asleep
together in the same bed, but couldn’t promise that they would refrain for the
week. Conserving body heat against the chilly air of the attic gave both of
them a very convenient rationale to continue to do so while they were able to.
The discussion surrounding other bedroom activity was especially uncomfortable.
As he handed over the box of condoms, Stan forced himself to verify with Dipper
that he knew how to properly use them, and got them both to promise that Dipper
would always wear one when they planned to have sex. He went through the list
of physical and behavioral evidence that can accidentally be left behind after
intercourse, and how easily their parents could discover it.
Not that the twins were able to immediately indulge themselves in all things
sexual. That same afternoon, Mabel’s period arrived, and with it came several
days of self-imposed celibacy. The bloating and cramps didn’t put a substantial
dent in Mabel’s happy mood. But she educated Dipper on the unsexy physical
consequences that girls have to endure, and why she didn’t want to engage
“that” part of her body for the time being. Mabel offered more than once to
give Dipper her special oral treatment, but he shyly declined, wanting to wait
until she could also receive the same treatment from him.
As a result, the teens didn’t want to stay cooped up in the Shack the entire
time. They bundled up and explored around Gravity Falls in the winter for the
first time. It was much quieter around than during the summer season, but
having everything adorned with heaps of white snow and colorful decorations of
the holiday season did make everything look nice. Stan took them to the lake
where they tried their hands at ice fishing, but that was cut short when he
developed a nosebleed, presumably from the dry cold air. After Stan assured the
kids he was fine waiting in the car, Mabel convinced Dipper to try skating. It
was something that Dipper’s ankles were not conditioned to do well at, but both
of them still had a lot fun flailing about on the frozen lake surface.
The twins felt badly about the way their visit with Wendy happened the previous
week, so the next afternoon on New Year’s Eve they asked to visit her again.
She happily picked them up and drove them into town, provided they agreed to
hang out with her crew of friends for the day. Nate and Lee were jovial as
ever, and Thomson looked much more confident in his skin. Tambry seemed to be a
good influence on Robby, as he was far less of a jerk than he had been the
previous year, and the twins fit in with the older teens again quickly.
Thompson took advantage of his access to the theater and sneaked everyone in
for a private viewing of a movie, then afterward they all enjoyed a big plate
of nachos along with cups of hot chocolate and coffee at Greasy’s Diner.
Finally they all had fun setting off small firecrackers at the top of the bluff
as they rang in the new year at midnight. When she dropped the kids off at the
Shack in the wee hours, Wendy told them how cool it was to see her little buds
back to their old selves again.
Following a quiet New Year’s Day, Soos came out to the Shack to have a visit
after he took Melody back to Portland. He and the twins had a blast playing
board games, then he took them to town for some old-time arcade gaming and a
couple of rounds of laser tag. Like Wendy and her friends, he seemed oblivious
to any unusual dynamic between Dipper and Mabel.
Later that evening after dinner, Stan suggested he could teach the kids the
right way to play poker. While Dipper liked the idea, Mabel stretched and
yawned exaggeratedly, saying she was very tired, and looked pointedly at her
brother. He asked her if she was all right, then suggested maybe she could turn
in to get some rest while Stan gave him some pointers for the card game. Stan
sighed and informed Dipper that knowing how to read facial and body signals is
key to playing poker, and he obviously wasn’t ready to learn that yet. Dipper
was still confused as Stan put the cards away, until Mabel took his hand and
dragged him up the stairs.
Very shortly afterwards, Dipper successfully demonstrated his ability to roll
on a condom and then use it for the job it was intended for. Fifteen minutes
later, Mabel gave it a try with a second rubber, and proved equally proficient
at the skill. This one served its purpose for quite some time longer than the
first.
A third condom was also sacrificed before the twins fell asleep that night.
Friday was the last full day before the bus ride home. Dipper and Mabel only
came downstairs long enough for trips to the washroom and quick bites to eat,
awkwardly avoiding eye contact with their uncle as much as possible. Stan
barely saw the twins at all the entire day, and he supposed he couldn’t blame
them.
===============================================================================
“I wish you didn’t live so far away, Grunkle Stan!” Mabel whimpered, hugging
her uncle tight.
The old man patted Mabel on back as he returned the embrace. “You and me both,
Pumpkin.”
Mabel sniffed and wiped her eyes as she pulled back from Stan’s cheek, turning
her head at the sound of a shoe crunching on snow beside her. Dipper had just
finished handing their bags to the bus driver, and now stood uncertainly.
“I … I want to thank you, Grunkle Stan,” he stammered. “For everything! I don’t
… we don’t know what we’d have done without you.”
“Yeah,” Mabel added with a hard swallow. “You did a lot to help us … to protect
us!”
Stan shrugged. “Hey, you ignored half of what I tried to tell you.” His
expression turned sympathetic. “I’m just glad  some  of what I did managed to
help!”  
Dipper nodded gratefully and stepped into Stan’s other arm, and the Pines
family all shared a close family squeeze.
“You two are what you are to each other, and I get it,” Stan murmured quietly
as he held them. “This is going to be tough for you, no matter what happens.
Just … be careful! And take good care of each other!”
“We will,” Dipper mumbled into Stan’s shoulder.
Mabel wept lightly on Stan’s opposite shoulder. “We love you, Grunkle Stan!”
“Yeah yeah yeah,” Stan grumbled. He heard a clearing of a throat from the
direction of the bus. “C’mon. The driver isn’t gonna wait all day on you kids.”
He relaxed his arms and nudged them away. “You have to get your butts moving.”
The twins reluctantly stepped back. Picking up their carry-on packs, they
walked slowly onto the coach stairs, waving and calling goodbye.
“Good luck!” Stan called back while waving.
He watched through the windows as they found their way to the back seat of the
mostly empty bus. Mabel frantically waved one last time as the driver wasted no
time pulling away from the side of the road. Soon the roar of the exhaust
faded, and the taillights disappeared from view over a hill beneath the late
afternoon setting sun.
“You're gonna need it,” Stan said sadly to himself, then slowly turned back to
his car.
===============================================================================
The first several miles were spent in relative quiet, the twins lost in their
thoughts. Dipper held Mabel’s hand as they watched the rural Oregon scenery
stream past the window.
Mabel broke the silence. “How’s your new pills going? Are they still working?”
“Yeah, actually!” Dipper replied. “Last weekend I had still been been feeling
the cravings first thing in the morning and the end of the day, but the last
few days have been good. I’m down to one Methadone daily, as of this morning.”
Dipper felt Mabel squeeze his hand. “That’s  good , Dip! I’m really proud of
you!” she said.
He squeezed back on Mabel’s hand, one side of his mouth twitching up. “I  think
I’ve kicked it, but I’ll know for sure next week.” His eyes fell, his
expression turning somber. “I know I never want to have pills like that in the
house again. For …  either  of us!”
Mabel looped her arm through Dipper’s and she pulled herself close. “I’m sorry
about all that crazy stuff I said about wanting those pills,” she said quietly,
staring at the seatback in front of her. “And for all the other stuff about …
hurting myself.”
Dipper’s gaze also was fixed vacantly straight ahead. “I was really scared,” he
replied almost inaudibly, unconsciously pulling tighter on Mabel’s arm.
“I know, cause I was too!” Mabel admitted. “I didn’t know how to handle all the
junk I was feeling. And the meds I was on really didn’t seem to be helping.”
Her brother quickly glanced over to her with knit eyebrows. “Wait, the meds you
were  on?” Dipper inquired. “You stopped taking the Prozac?” Mabel nodded.
“When did this happen?”
“Last weekend,” she quipped, clearly unconcerned. When Dipper’s frown did not
disappear, Mabel sighed. “Dipper, putting all of our poop in the past was all I
needed. I’m fine! I  never  felt like I was being helped by the
antidepressants, anyways!”
“Yeah, I guess that’s true,” Dipper allowed. “But what are Mom and Dad going to
say?”
Mabel shrugged. “I dunno … If I don’t need ‘em, they wouldn’t want me to be
taking drugs I don’t need, would they?”
“No, I suppose not. But this  does  raise another problem we need to talk
about,” Dipper said.
“You mean Daddy and Mama,” Mabel acknowledged. “What are we gonna tell them
about why we’re all fine and dandy again all of a sudden after our extra time
at Gravity Falls?”
Dipper nodded gravely. “Right. They never really bothered either of us all this
time about finding out what happened in September because we’ve both been
really down. But now … when they see both of us  happy  again, they’ll want to
know everything.”
Mabel pursed her lips in dramatic thought, a sly grin on her face. “I don’t
suppose we could  act  like we’re still all angsty and stuff, could we?”
“Yeah, right!” Dipper chuckled. “Just what we need, another layer of lies and
deception to try to keep straight.” Mabel stuck out her tongue, a silly gesture
which Dipper returned. “But seriously, Mabes. We need to come up with
something.”
The playful look on Mabel’s face fell away and she became pensive.
“Actuaaaaaaa-ally,” she began, “I  do  have an idea, but …”
“But what?” Dipper prompted.
“... but it kindaaaaaaa … really makes you look …” Mabel peered at Dipper with
remorse, “...  bad! ”
“It’s okay,” Dipper said after steeling himself, “let me hear it.”
Mabel hemmed and hawed, then explained. “The first time they knew that
something was wrong was the night you … you know … broke everything off.” Her
voice faltered at the memory. “And I got  really  mad! Did you ever explain to
them anything about what happened?” Dipper shook his head. “Me neither. So …
I’m thinking we could tell them that we were studying in your room, and I
started teasing you about something. Something  really  mean, like maybe that
you’d never get yourself a girlfriend, or whatever. And I didn’t stop, I kept
teasing you over and over. And finally …” Mabel took a deep breath, “... we say
you had enough, and … you …” she gazed at Dipper apologetically, “…  hit  me.”
Dipper paled. He couldn’t  imagine  striking his twin! Their parents would be
completely shocked by the suggestion that he could do this. But then he quickly
saw that the absurdity of the idea was precisely what they were looking for!
For Mabel to have had such a furious reaction, for Dipper to have been so
forlorn … it deftly explained what could have caused Dipper to walk out the
afternoon he got mugged in Oakland. And from there all the hard feelings that
followed, evident for everyone to see. It was also a completely rational reason
for the twins to not want to talk about it to their parents. As horrible as it
was, it was a perfect explanation!
“I’m sorry!” Mabel whispered meekly.
“No, it’s okay,” Dipper said shakily, “that actually sounds good. Well, no … it
sounds  terrible , but … I think that could work.” He rubbed his forehead. “But
what about why we’re better now? In this story, what happened this past week to
explain how you could forgive me for that?”
After a moment of thought, Mabel half-smiled sardonically. “Well, I  did  slug
you and knocked you out.” She softly placed her hand on Dipper’s cheek. “Sorry
again for that!” she said gently.
Dipper snorted dismissively. “Mabel, I don’t care about that!”
“Still, maybe we tell them a small bit of the truth. We say you hit me, so I
clocked you back, and … now we’ve called it even?”
“You think Dad would just let that be the end of it?” Dipper mused. “That his
kids now solve their disagreements by punching each other?”
“I guess not,” Mabel conceded. Then her face lit up. “Wait, I’ll know we’ll
tell them! We won’t tell a small  bit  of truth!” She paused dramatically as
Dipper looked questioningly at her. “We’ll tell them something that actually
is  the truth!”
Dipper’s expression was transformed into disbelief of Mabel’s sanity. She waved
her hand. “Not  that  truth, silly!” she admonished him. “The part about how
you found your faith! When you told me what happened to you, when you gave
yourself up, all the hurt and mistrust that I felt … just  went away ! Sure, I
won’t I’ll tell them  everything , but that really was the moment I knew you
would be with me, and you wouldn’t ever hurt me again!” She giggled lightly.
“Why  shouldn’t  that be the moment when I forgave you for something stupid you
did? It actually was!” Mabel tilted her head when she didn’t read complete
agreement on her brother’s face. “You don’t want to tell them, Dip? You’re not
gonna hide your belief from Daddy and Mama, are you?”
“Oh no, not at all!” Dipper replied carefully. “I just … I’m having trouble
separating that moment from  us!  From us  together! ” He relaxed after a
moment’s thought. “But that’s cool that you look at that moment in that way.
And yeah, we totally can tell them that was when we sorted things out between
us.”
Mabel looked pleased with her own cleverness. “Good! It makes it easier to tell
a fib about something when most of it is actually real! It’ll be a lot better
for when I go back to church.”
That stirred a question that had been on Dipper’s mind. “Mabel … what do  you
believe? I mean, you don’t  have  to follow along with me, if you don’t want t-
”
“Dipper, I’m not at all sure  what  I believe,” Mabel interjected, “but I’m
open to everything, and for now I’m  more  than happy sharing your journey with
you.” Dipper smiled warmly, happy that Mabel wasn’t feeling forced or
uncomfortable with his religious conversion. Mabel smiled back fondly. Then she
remembered something. “Wait! That huge black Bible of yours! Where did that
come from anyways? I’ve never seen it before, and I didn’t see you pack it in
your suitcase.”
“Well … I  didn’t  pack it,” admitted Dipper. “I have ...  a secret hiding
place for it at the Shack.”
“Really? Cool!” Mabel’s eyes were huge with the promise of old familiar
intrigue that she associated with their adventures in Gravity Falls. “Where is
it?”
It was Dipper’s turn to be very satisfied with himself. “It wouldn’t be a
secret  if I told anyone, would it?”
“Ah man! You’re not even gonna tell me?” Mabel pouted adorably. “When we go
back, I am  so  gonna find your mysterious hidey hole!” She poked Dipper in the
stomach, triggering a mini tickle fight. Quickly they were laughing
uncontrollably as they poked mitten-clad hands anywhere they could reach to try
to force the other to submit. Finally Mabel wrestled Dipper down onto his back
on the coach seats and attacked his ribs mercilessly, leaving Dipper helpless
and unable to breathe, he was laughing so hard. Mabel accepted his surrender.
“I’m  always  gonna be the Alpha Twin, you know!” she smirked.
Gasping hard, Dipper sat up and blushed sheepishly at the stares they received
from some of the other passengers, separated from them by several rows of empty
seats. “Fine!” he chuckled quietly. “I pledge my loyalty to you, my Alpha! You
happy?”
“For now!” Mabel proclaimed with smugness. Dipper sat back in the corner next
to the window, and Mabel settled in close beside him. “I’ve missed doing dumb
stuff like this with you,” she sighed. “I’m so glad we’re back to this again!”
“Yeah,” smiled Dipper, accepting Mabel’s weight on himself. “Just like the good
old days.”
Mabel suddenly turned to Dipper. “Wait a minute!” she demanded excitedly. “Hold
the gosh-darned phone!”
Dipper shook his head in bemusement at his unpredictable sister. “Yes?”
“We had a great time this week, right?” Mabel asked. “Not … up in the attic ...
 but the other stuff! Dumb, innocent stuff that’s fun!” Her brother nodded
agreement. “Well do you know when was the last time we had fun like that
together?”
“Uhh …” Dipper tried to think of such a time. “Not recently, for sure.” He
couldn’t think of a single light-hearted moment in California the entire
autumn: he and Mabel had been angry, frightened, saddened, or passionate, but
never had it been just plain-old fun. Even their last week of summer had been
dedicated exclusively to their new romantic feelings for each other. “I guess
I’d say … our birthday in Portland?”
“Correct-a-mundo!” Mabel declared. “There might have been other things on our
minds that day, but until we got back to the hotel, that was a  fun  day! And
so were a bunch of days before that! Then with everything that happened after
that night, everything changed!  We  changed!”
“Well, yeah! Obviously!” Dipper said, confused. “We realized we loved each
other. Of course we changed.”
“But it’s  how  we changed, Dipper!” she cried, frustrated over her inability
to articulate her thoughts. “Here, think of it this way … After our birthday,
how would you describe your relationship to me?”
Dipper didn’t hesitate. “Boyfriend.” Then a shy smile. “Lover.”
Mabel raised a finger. “And other than ‘brother’ or ‘twin’, how would you
describe your relationship to me  before  our birthday?”
He only paused for a moment. “Friend.” And then another smile, this one full of
understanding. “ Best  friend!”
“Exactly!” Mabel exclaimed. “We were so new at this, so busy figuring out how
to be lovers, we forgot to be  friends! ” She grabbed Dipper’s hand excitedly.
“You have always been my Bee-Eff-Eff, Dip-Dop! But it never felt like it after
all this started happening.”
“You’re right!” Dipper muttered, amazed at how dense they both had been all
this time. “I gave up being your friend by trying to be your boyfriend … when
what really I should have been able to be …”
“... is  both! ” the twins said in unison.
Mabel nodded excitedly. “If we can remember that, this whole thing will be so
much easier on us, won’t it?”
Dipper agreed. “Yeah! Man, it’s crazy we never saw this before.”
“And we can’t be  all  things to each other,” Mabel added. “Part of what made
this past week so much fun was spending time with friends. I need to make
things better with my old posse at school. And you with your nerd friends.”
“And we can’t ignore Mom and Dad anymore, either,” Dipper pointed out. “We have
to be careful, but we’ll all be happier if we aren’t  scared  of them. Then
they’ll go back to treating us normally.”
Mabel grinned. “If Mama and Daddy think everything is just fine again …”
Dipper grinned back. “... then maybe we’ll get some time  alone  again!” He
puffed his chest proudly. “I can learn to take some risks!”
Mabel wagged her finger mockingly. “But not  too  big of a risk, mister!”
The twins laughed, happy and relaxed. The sky was darkening fast, and there
were hours to go before their next stop. They agreed to take a nap, much as the
others on the bus appeared to be doing. Dipper sat up straight, his feet
dangling off the floor, while Mabel tucked her feet under herself, and she
leaned her cheek on her broseph;s shoulder and got comfortable. Dipper’s arm
wrapped easily around her.
“You know, for as many mistakes as we’ve made since our birthday, there is  one
thing we did that is exactly right,” Dipper yawned, with his own cheek resting
on Mabel’s head.
“Yeah? What’s that?” muttered Mabel sleepily, her eyes heavy.
Dipper brought his free arm across his body, the knuckles of his fist touching
Mabel’s thigh. She smiled and lazily bumped her own fist onto his as her eyes
closed.
“I love you, too,” the twins whispered together.
They fell asleep as the bus moved steadily down the highway, to their home,
their future together about to be written again.
===============================================================================
Chapter End Notes
     There you have it, folks: at long last, the struggle to finish this
     story is finally complete! I’m hoping that everyone who has stayed
     with me on this understands and forgives me for the literal years
     this story required. It was a combination of personal life struggles
     at home for me, and the discovery that I find writing angsty, tragic
     stuff to be very, very taxing on me. For several chapters, it was
     quite literally painful to write this story.
     When I laid out the outline for this story back in late March / early
     April of 2015, I wanted this story to be the “opposite” to Fistbump.
     My original fic was all about serendipity, event after event on a
     magical day that perfectly led the twins to a wonderful revelation,
     but then concluding with a hard punch to the gut in the end. This
     would be the reverse: the twins would battle against cruel
     circumstances for the entire length of the story, before finally
     reaching a happy conclusion. I hope it makes for an effective
     counterpoint, and that both stories are stronger as a result.
     I also want to point out why I portrayed Mabel’s behavior the way I
     did over the course of this story. At the conclusion of the first
     story, this happy girl was traumatized in a way she had never been
     before. She was told that she had to simply stop a relationship of
     intense and perfect love with Dipper, while still being around him at
     all times. The loss she experienced pushes her into the first stage
     the classic “Five Stages of Grieving”: Denial. She spent the first 5
     ½ chapters of this story denying that the relationship ended at all
     (and even denying the violation she felt over Dipper’s mistake in bed
     in Chapter 3). Only when Dipper forced her to face that they couldn’t
     continue the way they had been, did she move to Stage 2 (Anger),
     which occurred through Chapter 7. Stage 3 (Bargaining) was triggered
     by Dipper’s hospitalization in Chapter 8, but when she realized that
     the situation was not going to go back to the way it was, she finally
     fell into Depression (Stage 4). She might have been able to reach the
     Acceptance stage (Stage 5), if not for the conclusion of this story
     resulting in the re-starting of their relationship together.
     (Dipper’s reactions did not follow the same pattern as Mabel’s
     because of Dipper’s more pragmatic nature, and due to the fact that
     he was thrust into simply trying to cope with Mabel’s changing
     states. Obviously, Dipper felt the same feelings of loss, but he
     buried his own pain, choosing to let remorse and guilt be the
     triggers for his outward behavior.)
     Well, enough of all that. Glad that I’ve finally completed the story,
     and that you have a happy ending!
     E-o-F
     (PS: Watch for the Epilogue to this story, coming in a couple of
     days.)
***** Epilogue *****
Chapter Notes
     So here’s what’s going on:
     Chapter 14 was the canon end of “Fistbump 2: Unspeakable”. I will be
     following that story up with more stories of Dipper and Mabel as they
     return to California after their reconciliation in Gravity Falls over
     the Christmas holidays. I hope you will enjoy them as I write them in
     the future.
     So what is this epilogue? This is an optional ending that I wrote for
     the story of Fistbump 2: an ending that was fun to write, but is
     actually NOT a part of the story. It’s an unofficial bonus. Think of
     it as a “DVD Special” ending. Keep this in mind as you read it, as
     some will find the implications unpleasant.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
===============================================================================
After watching the kids’ bus pull away from the transit stop, Stan started
driving back to the Mystery Shack. Every time he had to say goodbye to them, it
seemed to get harder and harder. They were such good kids, and so much seemed
to always be happening to them, he just wanted them to be safe and happy. He
was still uncomfortable with accepting them being in love with each other, and
more than a bit creeped out with what they did together, but he now knew that
they truly belonged with and needed each other. They were no different in that
respect than any other lovers.  
He was alone again. With the Shack closed to tourists for the winter, Stan
enjoyed the freedom of being able to lounge around in his boxers and
undershirt, pretty much all the time. The only problem was the heat bills, but
his comfort was worth it!
Late that evening, he remembered that now that the twins were gone, he could
close off the attic again. No point in wasting heat, since no one would be up
there again until next summer, if the twins returned again. He was looking
forward to them coming back, as he climbed the stairs to make sure the attic
was tidied up before readying the space for the rest of the winter.
Entering the main room, he was pleased that the kids had pulled everything off
the mattresses already. The sheets had been stripped off the beds and deposited
in a laundry basket by the door. He smiled as he thought how considerate they
were, then his face slowly transformed to a grimace as he imagined what had
happened on those sheets over the last several days.  Yeah … better not look at
these sheets too closely before washing them,  he thought with a shiver.
After checking that the small window was securely closed, he turned to head
back to the door when he stubbed his toe hard on the edge of a raised
floorboard. “Ow! Son of a bitch!” he yelled, grabbing his sore foot while
hopping on the other.
After the pain receded a bit, he knelt down to look at the offending plank.
Weird,  he thought,  there are tiny holes where the nails are supposed to be.
This board was pulled up!  Then he noticed that two more boards beside it had
similar missing nails.
Curious, he pried at the raised board, and all three boards, formed into an
oddly-shaped panel, lifted out of the floor. They had been fastened together on
the bottom with screws so that it functioned like a single piece. Beneath the
panel was a cavity between the floor beams. A board had been fashioned to give
the space a floor. It was a secret storage space that Stan knew nothing about!
It contained one item: a very thick book, with a heavy black binding and
matching heavy front and back covers. Stan recognized it: he’d seen Dipper
reading it at various times over the last summer, and a couple of times right
around Christmas Day, when he had poked his head up to say it was time for
dinner or whatnot. Dipper never brought the book downstairs. He now looked at
the inscription on the front: there was a simple white cross and the words
“Holy Bible” above it, printed in a clear bold font.
Stan was not a religious man, and he thought he knew Dipper.  That’s a
surprise,  he mused.  Never figured the kid to be a thumper like his parents!
Then he shrugged his shoulders.  Oh well, who am I to judge? I guess he hid it
up here because he thought I’d tease him, or something. If he wants to keep it
up here, fine by me!
As he started placing the book back into the floor, something caught his eye.
There were slightly thicker pages in the book, so that they divided the book
into different sections. Even a guy like Stan knew that a Bible had two
sections: the Old Testament and the much smaller New Testament. But he could
see that  this  Bible was divided into  three , roughly equal-sized sections.
Stan opened the front cover of the book. He was shocked to see a black and
white image of a six-fingered hand, with a large “1” in its middle. He quickly
leafed through the book. It was a complete photocopy of Stanford’s journals.
All three of them!
He silently cursed his great nephew.  Leave it to Dipper to do something like
this,  thinking back to when the original journals had been destroyed.  He must
have somehow copied them shortly after Ford’s return his first summer here,
after he learned I had the first two volumes. Probably wanted to have a backup,
just in case. And covered it up by disguising it as a book he figured I’d never
look at. Smart kid! Maybe  too  smart!
The journals were too dangerous, and Stan couldn’t let Dipper keep this secret
copy. Carrying it down the stairs, he wondered if Dipper would even say
anything when he returned next time and found it missing: he couldn’t very well
complain that someone had taken something from him, when he wasn’t supposed to
have it in the first place! He grinned wickedly as he wished he could be a fly
on the wall and see Dipper’s face when he found the cavity in the floor empty.
He approached the Shack’s fireplace, which was roaring nicely. The copy of the
journals would burn up quickly, and that would be that.
Just as he was about to toss it into the flames, he noticed one last detail
about the book. A small bookmark was visible in the pages on the top edge.
Unable to resist, he wanted to see what Dipper had been looking up, the last
thing the kid would ever see in the cursed journals. The bookmark was placed
near the end of the 2 nd  volume. He placed his finger on the spot and flipped
the book open to the marked page.
His blood ran cold as he processed what he saw on the page. The implications
were terrifying. For several moments he couldn’t move.
“Kid!” he finally spoke aloud in the empty house, his voice shaking. “What the
hell did you  do? ”
===============================================================================
Dipper opened his eyes, a small cramp in his leg from his awkward position on
the bus seats rousing him from sleep. He smiled as he saw that Mabel was still
dozing, her head comfortable on his shoulder, so light, almost weightless.
But … why does she look so pale? And … why is everything on the bus… in black
and white?
The smile dropped from his face. Tentatively, he reached to touch Mabel’s hair
with his free hand. Even though he pretty much expected it, he still felt
shocked discomfort as his hand passed right through her locks, like he was a
ghost. He took a deep breath, then stood up and turned around, curiously
observing his corporeal body still in its seat and sound asleep, still
providing his sister with a shoulder to sleep on.
Dipper stepped out into the aisle. The bus continued to cruise down the
highway, gently rocking the passengers with each bump and curve on the road.
Strangely, he was also affected by the motion, while being completely invisible
and insubstantial to the other passengers.
He sighed impatiently, looking forward the length of the bus.
“All right!” he called out loudly. “What do you want?”
“You, of course!” shouted a loud, irritating voice directly behind him.
Dipper yelped loudly, startled by the glowing yellow triangular demon that now
floated less than an inch behind his head, laughing hysterically. The
apparition looked ridiculous as always: a single large eye on his face and
cartoonish arms, legs, and top hat. But Dipper knew how dangerous and powerful
he could be.
He wasn’t happy to be seeing Bill Cipher again.
Not so soon.
“Bill!” Dipper cried angrily. “Why are you here again now?”
“Relax, Pine Tree!” Bill replied casually. “I was just watching those dreams of
yours. You know, you humans usually find thoughts like that pretty messed up!”
“Shut up, Bill!” Dipper fired back. “It’s none of your business!”
“Considering our …  deal …  last week, I’d say it  is  my business.”
Unconsciously, Dipper’s hands started balling into fists. Bill twirled his cane
as he hovered around Dipper in a circle, forcing Dipper to turn with him. The
demon’s eye narrowed in thought.
“I’ve put some thought into this, Pine Tree,” he said. “You are the most unique
human I’ve ever dealt with, and for somebody so young, you’re actually not as
dumb as I first thought.” He paused dramatically. “When you and I made our
first deal, I took advantage of you. You had no time to think about what I was
offering, to clarify what kind of ‘puppet’ I wanted. I mean, you do know I
really  screwed you over, don’t you kid?” Dipper scowled at the memory. “I've
decided that wasn't fair to you. So, against my better judgement, I’ve going to
offer you something for free, no obligation!”
“Bill,  everything  you do has strings attached,” Dipper retorted. “Why would I
believe you now?”
“You don’t have to! But I’m offering it anyways, just because I’m such a great
guy!” Bill declared with delight. “Here’s my offer! I’m giving you a chance to
go back on the deal we made last week, now that you’ve had more time to think
about it. Any regrets? Second thoughts? Just tell me, and I wipe the slate
clean. Promise! And I’ll even give you time to think about it!”
Bill snickered and did a fast shuffle-step dance, extending his cane to one
side with one hand and doffing his hat with the other. “An hour should be more
than enough! See you then! BY-YEE!!” The triangular trickster flashed out of
Dipper’s sight.
Dipper gaped at the empty space in front of him.  He's giving me an out? After
he got exactly what he wanted?
His memory flashed back to the previous week, the night after his parents left
to return to California.
===============================================================================
My eyes were wide open, fully adjusted to the dark of Great-Uncle Ford’s room
in the Mystery Shack. I had the alarm on my phone set to vibrate under my
pillow for 4am, but it wasn’t necessary. I hadn’t fallen asleep in the first
place.
I was glad I had already decided to be alone that night. While Mabel usually
sleeps like a stone at even the worst of times, it was safer than trying to
sneak out with her sleeping a few feet away. I got dressed in my jeans and
sweatshirt, slid the “bible” and a small sack out from under the bed, wrapped
them up in my jeans and sweatshirt, then quietly out to the porch door. I
quickly bundled up in my winter coat and boots, having if possible even less
concern about waking Grunkle Stan. Seriously, I could have probably done all
this preparation right in his bedroom and he’d still sleep through it. Then I
pulled on my gloves, checked that I had my flashlight, put the book under my
arm, grabbed the sack, and quickly slipped out into the night.
The weather was cold that night, well below freezing, but incredibly clear,
calm, and quiet. There was no moon, but the endless stars and the sparkly
reflection off the frozen snow still provided some illumination. As I left the
tramped-down foot path and headed off into the woods, each step that broke
through the snow’s crusty surface sounded like a shot from a gun.
I arrived at the clearing, the same clearing that Mabel and Soos had told me
about a year and a half ago. I found a spot as close to the center of the
clearing as I could, and took out eight candles from the sack, arranging them
in a circle. Pulling out my flashlight and opening to the marked page from
Journal 2, I checked that the size and positioning of the candles was correct.
With the book of matches that I had also packed, I quickly had the candles all
lit. The effect of the yellow circular glow of the candles combined with the
bluish hue of the starlight to give the clearing an eerie quality.
The Shack wasn’t really that far from this clearing, and I was a little worried
about how far my voice would carry, but there was no time left to worry about
that. Tucking the flashlight under my arm so that I could read, I held the
heavy book out in front of me. I was fairly sure that I had memorized the
incantation, but I couldn’t afford to make a mistake. The spell had to be cast
perfectly.
“Triangulum! Entangulum! Veneforis dominus ventium! Veneforis venetisarium!”
At first nothing happened. I started to check the Latin words again, to make
sure that I had pronounced them correctly. As I shone the flashlight down to
the page, the phrasing just looked … ridiculous! I snorted, then looked at the
drawing of the circular wheel on the opposite page, with a now-familiar image
of his nemesis at its center. Then all the writings on the pages. It was all so
hilarious! Chuckling, I looked at the circle of candles, then the trees and the
snow around me. My laughter burst out fully as I beheld the sky, and beyond to
the whole cosmos of planets, stars, and galaxies! I couldn’t control myself.
I’m sure I sounded crazy as I spun around in glee, laughing in full-throated
uproar. Somehow, as I was experiencing this revelation, the universe was simply
hysterical!
But the levity was short-lived. In a flash, it felt like I was punched in the
gut.  Really  hard! I doubled over in pain, and struggled to breathe after
getting the wind knocked out of me. Then came the most terrifying experience:
it felt like something had taken control of my body, with me still inside. All
my senses still sent their messages to my brain, but my body wasn’t following
my orders! I watched helpless from inside my eyes as my body fell to its knees,
then pain exploded everywhere in my arms and torso as I was being stretched, my
arms backwards and down toward the snow, while my chest was thrust towards the
sky. Every muscle twitched with the strain of the effort.
I wanted to scream out in agony, but even that was denied me. Instead, I felt
my mouth move, and my chest and throat muscles flex of their own accord as my
body shouted out a nonsense phrase, which sounded something like “Egassem
Sdrawkcab.” At least six times, the phrase was literally yanked from my lungs
by some unseen force, each louder and higher pitched than the last. My arms
were raised and stretched wide to my sides, and I probably had the look of
someone who had been crucified.
Then I was released, and I collapsed onto the snow. As I pushed myself up to my
hands and knees, I felt wind blowing, then came a flash of light that marked
the creation of a three-sided hole in the air, directly in front and above me,
the edges of which immediately burst into flames. Sounds of maniacal laughter
erupted from all around as an eyeball formed in the rift. The wind whipped up
like a tornado, pelting my face with frozen powdered snow, as I struggled to my
feet. I’m sure the whole presentation would have been horrifying if I didn’t
already know what was going to emerge.
Finally, with a comical little “whup” noise, all the energy of the area
collapsed into the rift, leaving a triangular-shaped demon floating in front of
me.
Last year, I had helped join together all the forces required to banish Bill
Cipher, seemingly forever. Now, I had just released him once again.
I hoped I knew what I was doing.
Bill looked around, somehow making it obvious that he was feeling relief,
despite his lack of most facial features. “Oh, once again! Gravity Falls, my
favorite petri dish in the universe! What’s going …” Then he stopped as his eye
focused on me.
His body transformed, turning bright red and growing to immense size in an
instant, looming directly over me. “YOU!!!” his voice shouted, impossibly low
and loud, literally shaking me off my feet onto my butt.
“Bill!” I called out.
“You’re responsible for destroying my plans!” he thundered. “YOU’RE responsible
for sending me out of here!” His body twisted, enveloping me from all sides.
“DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT I’M GOING TO DO TO YOU???”
The demonic force collapsed around my body, constricting me like an enormous
python. “BILL  !!” I yelled in a panic. “I want to make a DEAL with you!!
A millisecond later, Bill had shrunk back to his regular yellow appearance,
leaving me staggering. “Well, why didn’t you say so?” he said happily, without
missing a beat. “I’m always up to making deals! What is it you want, Pine Tree?
We can discuss terms on anything I can do for you!”
Struggling to slow my heart after the quick scare, I swallowed, and closed my
eyes. This is when I told this little apparition from hell why I summoned him.
Why I so desperately needed him.
I looked the demon in his eye.
“I need the universe to let me love my sister!” I shouted angrily. Or at least
tried to, but by the time I finished the short sentence, my throat had closed
and my eyes were wet. Saying it out loud reinforced just how important this was
to me.
Bill blinked. “Wow! Didn’t expect  that  from you, kid! I didn’t think I could
be surprised by anything!” He paused, his eye narrowing. “Exactly what do you
want?”
I cleared my throat, and spilled my guts. “I want to be allowed to be in love
with Mabel, and that she be allowed to love me! I want to experience being in
love with her the way other people do, with their true loves! I don’t want to
always be afraid of our parents finding out, and separating us! I don’t want to
always be looking around for neighbors, friends, church members, or anybody
else seeing us and being disgusted.” My deepest wishes kept tumbling out, as my
voice grew ragged. “I want Mabel to be happy, and not have to worry about
depression. I … I don’t want to be scared that if I leave her alone, the next
time I see her … “ I stopped to gasp a breath, “will be her body hanging in ...
in the attic with a r- ... a rope around her neck ...” Rivers of tears were
running down my face, and I couldn’t say anything more. Silence returned to the
clearing, the exception of my quiet sobs.
“You’re asking a lot, kid.” Bill said, after a time. I could have sworn I heard
something approaching sympathy in his voice. Might have been wishful thinking,
though. “I can’t change anything about the personalities or actions of anybody.
If your parents, or other people in your life, don’t want you and your sister
together, I can’t change their minds. And I can’t stop them them from doing
what they think they need to do.”
I felt a panic rising. My sobs were transforming into hyperventilation. Had I
released this cursed devil for nothing?
“But,” he added shrewdly, “I  can  do some things to control how people
perceive the world around them! It’s easy when they’re dreaming, but there are
small things I can do even when they’re awake.” Bill’s eye narrowed again as he
thought about my request.
“So how about this, Pine Tree? I watch you and Shooting Star all the time.
Twenty-four seven! If there is anyone around you who knows you’re siblings, and
you do anything ‘inappropriate’,” he paused to close his eye dramatically, then
looked at me again and kind of shrugged. “Ha ha! It’s hard to wink with only
one eye! Never mind! If the two of you do anything that would cause suspicion
of, ahem, romantic feelings for each other, I’ll make sure they don’t notice
you.”
“Wh ... what do you mean?” I stammered, wanting to make sure Bill wasn’t
tricking me.
“I mean if you’re holding hands in the park or a movie, I’ll make sure not a
single person you know will ever see you. If you’re alone at home, I’ll make
sure it stays that way if you need it to. If you’re getting frisky in your
room, I’ll make sure neither of your parents open your bedroom door. If you
stare at one another too long in front of your parents, I’ll make sure their
heads are turned away.”
This sounded to me like it could work! “How many people at a time can you do
this to?”
“As many as you need, kid! You could lay a big, wet smooch on your sister in
the middle of church service, and not a single person would notice! You could
get  real  kinky if you wanted! If you both got naked right on the floor in the
middle of your family reunion, I’d make sure not a soul would be the wiser!” I
blushed as I thought about how brazen Mabel and I could be.
“But … your sister might wonder how you’re doing that, though! You wouldn’t
want her to know about how you got access to this power, would you? About how a
certain being of pure energy got released back to Gravity Falls again ... now …
would … you?”
“You’re right,” I said, thinking. “I can make sure that I  act  like we need to
be careful, but I’ll know that we never actually have to worry about it!”
“And one more thing,” Bill stated. “It’s a real problem trying to change
anyone’s memories. Anyone who already knows about you lovebirds, well, I can’t
change that. And since they’re already aware of you together, I can’t do
anything to prevent those people from being able to see and hear you as you
really are.”
“The only person who knows is Grunkle Stan, and I know he won’t tell anyone.” I
looked up excitedly. “Yes, Bill, that’s what I want you to do!”
“Ah ah ahhh! Not so fast!” Bill responded sharply. I remembered there was more
to this. “You might want to consider what I’m going to ask from you in return.”
I was ready with my argument. “I already released you, Bill! That’s more than
payment enough, and  you  owe  me ! Do what you just suggested for me, and
we’re even!”
“Ahhh, hahahahaha!” he cackled back. “You’re funny, kid! You already released
me, all on your own! I owe you  nothing!  In fact, unless we do a deal, right
here, right now, I think I’ll just DESTROY YOU!!!” as the immense, red version
of himself formed at the end of his statement, then just as quickly snapped
back to normal.
A chill ran down my spine. I had no leverage. Bill knew exactly what I wanted,
and he knew just how much I wanted it. And he could demand whatever he desired
from me in return. He held all the cards.
“So, what do you think I’m going to ask? Hmm? Take a wild guess!” he taunted.
A feeling of dread filled me. “You want … my soul?” I stammered.
Bill waved his cane. “Pfft! That’s not even enough for a down payment on  your
mortgaged future! Man, you humans really overvalue your pitiful excuse for a
consciousness!” Bill squinted. “No, I need  much  more than the ability to
torment your essence for eternity!”
The night was deadly silent as he contemplated his price for my desire. My
breathing sounded like a hurricane in my ears. My heartbeat pounded so loudly I
thought I’d go deaf.
Finally, Bill spoke. “You know what? My plans for this place have just changed!
You’ve offered up a new opportunity for me. What I can accomplish here, with a
real live  willing  human to assist me … “ he twirled his cane in delight as
his “body” shook with elation, “it’s almost more than I ever hoped!” He paused
again, and I knew it was just for evil, dramatic effect.
“You want to know what my price is, Pine Tree?”
I didn’t answer his stupid rhetorical question. But he just had to drive home
who was really in control! “Pine Tree! I’m sorry? Maybe you weren’t listening!”
he said condescendingly as he stretched out an arm and snapped his finger in
front of my face. “Do … you ... want ... to … know … what ...”
“ Yes , asshole!” I shouted, shaking in rage, but powerless. “What’s your
price?”
He glided right up to my nose, filling my entire field of vision.
“ANYTHING! And EVERYTHING! You will  serve  me! You will be my  slave!  I will
tell you to do things that you don’t want to do, and you’ll  do  them! I will
tell you to do these things over .. and  over  … and  OVER AGAIN!  And you’ll
DO THEM !! Without  question , and without  fail !”
I shook with the enormity of his demands. “What ... what kinds of things?” I
stammered.
“Things your pathetic hormone-infested brain hasn’t yet even imagined,” Bill
sneered. “Things your worthless morality will crumble to comprehend!” He
floated back away, giving me some distance. “Think it over quick, kid. I don’t
have all night!”
Was it worth it? Could I sacrifice myself to this unknown hell? What could he
possibly ask me to do? What would I do for this love? For Mabel?
Mabel!!
I looked at Bill squarely. “Mabel is  off limits , Bill!” I demanded. “If I
agree, you will do  nothing  to harm her in any way! Ever! And you will  never
ask me to do anything to harm her! Do you understand?” I demanded furiously.
“Fine! Agreed! No problem! In fact, I'll personally  guarantee  her safety. But
only as long as you live up to your end of the deal!” Another dramatic pause. I
knew what was next. Damn him to hell! “Because your precious Shooting Star will
occupy the very  first  spot in my oh-so-gentle heart if you  ever  disobey me!
Remember that!”
I was trembling, terrified, but insanely, I still felt euphoric. If I did this,
Mabel and I can be together! We can be in love, be in a relationship, know what
it’s like to be happy together! We can live a life like we wanted to live, that
…
Wait, I realized with dread. Bill wants a willing human. A  live  willing
human. Bill wasn’t offering me a lifetime together with Mabel. I was going to
have to  leave  Mabel! There was an expiry date with this deal! I slumped with
the realization.
The equilateral entity snickered. “You got it, squirt!” I looked at him in
hatred. “You’re not going to be a very good minion for me if you’re still
gazing into her eyes, those big brown eyes, like you’re her puppy dog.” My
fists clenched in impotent fury. “Plus, I can only wait so long before I
collect my debt."
I figured he would want me for, what, half of what’s left of my life? If I live
another seventy years, that’d give Mabel and I until we’re … maybe fifty? Even
Mom and Dad aren’t even close to fifty yet! That's a lot of time! We can live a
lot, do a lot of things together …
Bill continued. “So you can go be with your, um … “girlfriend” … and have fun!
Then I’ll see you again when my end of the bargain is complete, and you and I
can start having  my  brand of fun!“ He counted off several long slender
fingers, making a show of counting. “In your perception of time, that’ll be …
next July!”
“Wait,  WHAT?!?”  I cried in shock. “You’re saying I only get … like, six
months  to be free with Mabel?”
“Hey, my time’s valuable! I’m going to be watching you two constantly! Spinning
reality inside the heads of dozens of people simultaneously in your sad little
meat space. What was it one of your great philosophers said? ‘When you’re good
at something, never do it for free.’ Hahaha! Wise words! That guy laughed a lot
too!"
I was immobilized with the injustice of it all, that this despicable piece of
shit held such power over me.
“That’s my offer, kid! What d’ya say?” He held out a flaming blue hand.
With my last shred of defiance, I threw out a counteroffer. “Just a few years!”
I shouted desperately, as Bill’s hand retracted. “Give us just ... just  four
more summers! I mean … give us high school! Give us … until the end of summer
when we turn eighteen! We ... we need more time together! We  deserve  more
time together! …  Mabel  … M ... Mabel ..." I fought to keep my chest still, as
a violent shudder tried to escape, "God dammit! God  DAMN it,  Bill! Mabel
deserves  more!  She … she deserves  so  much MORE!!” I stared at Bill’s
unblinking eye, imploring, as the cold skin on my cheeks stung from hot tears.
“Please ... Bill ... I’ll  never  ask anything else from you, ever again!” I
thrust my hand out towards him. “ Please!  I  beg  you!” I sobbed, meaning
every word.
Bill was motionless for a moment. I truly believe that he thought he felt sorry
for me.
“ PLEASE!!!”  I screamed at him.
Then his hand leapt forward and took mine. The blue flame danced over our
joined hands.
“Deal!” he exclaimed happily.
===============================================================================
Dipper paced up and down the aisle of the bus, muttering to himself. He needn't
have been quiet: it wasn't like anyone on the bus was able to see or hear him.
He hadn't really allowed himself to examine the wisdom of his choice this past
week. What was done was done: the choice had been made. And he'd had no desire
to look back. The deal had lifted the weight from Dipper's shoulders. He
revelled in not worrying any longer. He had been free, for a whole wonderful
week, to love Mabel the way she so deserved to be loved.
But now? Dipper would be irresponsible to not use this opportunity to consider
what he'd done. He had sold his soul, for starters! He didn't know what Bill
actually had in mind for his version of eternal damnation, although he sure was
certain it wouldn’t be pleasant.
But Dipper’s self-valuation was low. He’d been through so much over the last
several months, he honestly didn’t care about himself, or his cosmic fate, at
that moment. He didn’t view himself as a significant value in the equation.
However, Bill had mentioned things that Dipper would have to do. Things that it
was broadly hinted at that would be horrific to do. How terrifying could it be?
Would it involve … hurting people? Torturing people? Killing people? Something
even worse? Could he do that? Could he be the instrument for any monstrous plan
Bill could come up with?
Well, at the moment, he had no choice. Bill had threatened Mabel. If Dipper
didn’t follow Bill’s orders, Mabel would pay. That  wasn’t  going to happen!
But what if Dipper cancelled the deal, as Bill was now offering? He and Mabel
would have to try to continue as they had since September. It was a prospect he
didn’t relish. But they were just two people, and Bill had granted them less
than four years together: was that worth what Bill might conjure up? Was a few
years of happiness for two young teenagers worth what could be unimaginable
tribulation?
The math didn’t work out. Of  course  the two of them were not worth that! Any
logical, sane person could see that. There was no way he could possibly justify
this emotional, selfish deal, and Bill had offered the chance to cancel it. It
was obvious what he should do!
He headed back to the rear of the bus to wait for Bill to come back.
===============================================================================
Dipper had sat in one of the empty seats, directly in front of Mabel and his
own body. He was relaxed, having no doubt about his course of action. He
glanced at his watch, and figured Bill should be reappearing right … about …
now!
Sure enough, Bill winked into existence, though without any fanfare: no flash
of light or sound of any kind. He simply appeared. He was comfortably propped
up against the back of the seat next to Dipper, his slender arms extended
behind the “head” of his triangular body, his spindly legs crossed in front of
him
“So, Pine Tree, you’ve thought about my offer?” Bill asked calmly. He seemed to
not have a care in the world.
“Yeah,” sighed Dipper, gaze fixed ahead and refusing to look at the demon. “I
think you already know what I’ve decided.”
Bill was waiting with the serenity of Buddha. "Why don't you tell me, anyways?"
Dipper drew a breath, and let it out.
"We still have a deal," he said quietly.
If it was possible for a mouthless triangle to smirk, Bill Cipher accomplished
it. "I never had a doubt, Pine Tree!" Bill proclaimed, his voice dripping with
smug superiority. “The things you idiot humans do for love! I tell you that you
can’t even  imagine  the horror you’re going to witness, or what I’ll demand
you inflict on your worthless species! All for a few years of making sure no
one knows you’re exchanging your excess bodily fluids with your sister! What a
deal! ”
A flinch of powerless frustration was the only thing Dipper could do in
response. He wished the yellow bastard would just disappear and get on with
quietly protecting his and Mabel’s relationship.
“You know,” Bill continued unfazed, “I was  barely  able to get you to question
your feelings about your sister to make the sock puppet deal, and that was when
she was just your sibling! And not only did she redeem herself then, since then
you’ve also completely fallen in love with her.” Bill floated up beside
Dipper’s head, making it impossible to avoid being seen in Dipper’s peripheral
vision. “And yet, you don’t trust her. Or yourself! You just can’t risk that
either of you won’t make a mistake, so you need  me  to save you! Last week,
you agreed to the worst deal in history. And now, with plenty of time to
reconsider, you just agreed  again! ” Bill glided closer, stopping just a
hair’s width from Dipper’s cheek. “Face it, Stud!” he taunted. “Because you
want nothing more than to get busy with your sister, you’ve sacrificed
everything! You’ll do  anything  for her. Am I right?”
Dipper nodded helplessly, still staring forward.
Bill backed away slowly. “Well, I got what I wanted! A whole hour of watching
you try to talk yourself out of the worst decision of your life. I  knew  you
couldn’t do it!” He clapped his hands and rubbed them together, whipping up a
quick blue fireball. “My entertainment for the day is done! Thanks, kid! That
was a gas!"
Dipper finally looked over, pure hate in his expression, but Bill completely
ignored it.  "You probably won’t see me again until 2017, and by then there’ll
be  lots  to catch up on! But in the meantime, I’ll see  plenty  of you two!”
He cackled in evil glee, then glided up to the front of the bus, the glow from
his body increasing severely in brightness. “Remember,” he called out with
delight, “I’ll be waaaat-ching yoooooouuuuu !!!”
With a searing flash of light and one last peal of obnoxious laughter, Dipper's
arch enemy was gone. Disoriented, the teenager found himself returned to the
back seat, and the dark interior of the bus was once again seen to be in color.
He jerked in surprise, his actual body responding as it normally would.
Mabel groaned, awakened by Dipper's movement. "Dipper?" she mumbled, looking up
into his face. He looked down to her, their noses barely an inch apart. "You
okay?" she asked drowsily.
Dipper's heart was just slowing down from the brief jolt of surprise. Now as he
peered into Mabel's beautiful dark eyes, he felt his heart leap again.
His mouth parted into a small, dreamy smile.
"I am now," he whispered in reply, then leaned down to tenderly kiss his
sister's lips, his eyes closing in contented bliss.
As she lovingly kissed him back and his arms tightened around her body, Dipper
knew, beyond any doubt, he couldn't have made any other choice. Was it the
right one? He resolved it would be a few years before he'd even start  thinking
about finding out.
===============================================================================
 
Chapter End Notes
     What did you expect? That I’d actually give you a genuine happy
     ending?
     I am (in an admittedly evil way) very happy with this installment,
     and how all the “good” things that happened in the final couple of
     chapters got turned completely on their heads. If Mabel discovers the
     truth, that Dipper’s speech about belief was bullshit, that he knew
     Bill was the one “watching over them”, and that his faith is a sham,
     it will crush her. But Dipper really did do everything he did for
     Mabel, and for a chance at happiness together, something he did not
     believe was possible any other way.
     My hope is that dropping Bill Cipher into this story now was as
     unexpected as possible for the reader, given how ultra-“realistic”
     I’ve been throughout both of the stories I’ve written. I’ve been
     intentionally ignoring anything that couldn’t plausibly happen in
     real life, and I’ve even put a lot of effort into ensuring that the
     details of Portland and Piedmont are as authentic as I could. I
     wanted Bill’s appearance to be a surprising shock.
     However, please remember that this epilogue is “unofficial”. I will
     not be acknowledging any of the events or consequences of actions
     that take place in this epilogue as I continue the “Fistbump AU”. You
     can safely erase this entire chapter from your brain! No Bill Cipher,
     the “Bible” actually was a Bible, Dipper’s faith is genuine, and his
     willingness to risk for Mabel is real. The Fistbump AU will continue
     to be “realistic”, and for the most part, it will be set in a world
     very much like most Pinecest stories (their adventures growing up as
     teenagers, happy (but nervous) in private, coping in public. But I
     also have a few ideas for a longer stories in this timeline, as well.
     I’m hoping for a mix of sweetness and angst, of brightness and
     sadness, in this series.
     But for those of you who like the twist of this epilogue, I have good
     news for you, as well. I have privately endorsed one of my friends in
     this fandom to continue the alternative “special” ending into new
     stories. This writer is particularly adept at understanding Bill, and
     in imagining how unbelievably hurt and angry Mabel would be at Dipper
     would be if she finds out about how he lied to and deceived her over
     the deal with Bill. It will be great! I'll let everyone know when
     this splinter-AU becomes reality.
     So there you are! I think that this will be a satisfying way for the
     story to move forward, and hopefully everyone who has enjoyed this
     fic up until now will be able to continue to do so, regardless of
     their preferences.
     E-o-F
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