Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/4241760.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Teenage_Mutant_Ninja_Turtles_(TV_2012)
  Relationship:
      Leonardo/Raphael_(TMNT)
  Character:
      Leonardo_(TMNT), Raphael_(TMNT)
  Series:
      Part 1 of Feelings
  Stats:
      Published: 2015-06-30 Words: 2721
****** Feelings ******
by mechanicalmalware
Summary
     Leonardo has been hiding his more mature feelings towards Raphael for
     too long. The next thing he knows, he's unintentionally blurted out
     everything in Raph's presence. What will happen next? Read and find
     out.
My eyes followed my hotheaded younger brother as he entered the room. Raph was
massaging his right shoulder with his left hand. I could tell that he was
severely overworked from the stress of the last few days. We’ve begun a new
level of training and it’s been really intense, even for me. In short, we’re
all really sore and extremely tense.
“Need help?” I asked, not waiting for Raphael to grace me with an answer. I
pushed his hand away and began massaging the shoulder myself.
He let out a sound of protest and tried to pull away, but I held firm and
eventually he acquiesced. It was only moments before Raph started pressing up
into my hand.
On the outside, I was smirking at the fact that Raph was letting me do this. On
the inside I was at my wits’ end. Raphael, the brother I’ve been secretly in
love with for years, is letting me massage his shoulders. I was thrilled, yet
at the same time absolutely terrified. I mean, I really want to tell him, but
I’m afraid he’ll laugh at me, or say I’m sick. I honestly don’t know what to
think about myself sometimes. I mean, I’m in love with my younger brother,
shouldn’t that be wrong? Shouldn’t I be disgusted? But oddly enough, I’m not.
If anything, I want to be with him. I want it more than anything.
I placed my other hand on Raph’s left shoulder and began massaging both at the
same time. He leaned into the touch with a small ‘mmh’ of contentment. My face
was hot, and I’m really glad he can’t my expression.
I’ve never seen Raphael this way before. He’s so open, so peaceful. He’s
actually letting me help him. My heart swells with the trust that my hotheaded,
and usually skittish brother, has placed in me.
We’re standing so close together. I slow down in my massaging of his shoulders,
going slower and putting slightly more force into it.
Raph lets out a breathy little sigh and I can’t help but stare. He looks so
beautiful. Emerald green skin glints teasingly in the dim light of the lair,
his eyes are closed, his face relaxed, and his mouth slightly open. I can feel
the strength in the muscles quivering beneath my fingers. I stare in silent
awe, at the beauty before me. That strong, firm form that I have always admired
was right here, within my reach.
Suddenly the relaxed look on his face vanished and he let out a low hiss,
snapping me out of my reverie. “What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”
He grit his teeth, but shook his head. “Nah, muscles are just so tense.” They
sure were. I concurred silently, focusing myself on rubbing out the knots as
best I could.
Raph let out a light grunt of pain. I frowned and stopped my hands. “It’ll feel
better once I get them out.”
“I know. It’s just pain. Go ahead.” I continued in silence until Raph
apparently decided he couldn’t stay quiet any longer. “So, uh, why are you…ya
know?”
“Why am I what?” I asked, not paying much attention.
“Well, why the sudden interest in relieving my tension?” I offered no reply and
after a while Raph muttered, “You sure have been acting weird lately. You
okay?” He asked. “Something happen or something?”
“No.” I stated.
He frowned at that. “Then how come we haven’t had a single fight lately?”
My eyes narrowed, “You mean you want to?”
He turned his head to throw a bland glare in my direction. “You know I don’t.
I’m just saying it’s not normal. Something happened. You haven’t been getting
on my case as much lately.”
“Oh so our fights are my fault?” I asked, my anger slowly beginning to rise.
“No! I never said that! It’s just that we haven’t been interacting as much
lately.” He said. I could tell by his voice alone that he was fighting to
control his temper.
“You haven’t been around as much lately.” I stated, giving him something to
chew on. “You’ve been going out with Casey almost every night.”
Going out with Casey. Somehow that phrase had the power to burn straight
through my heart’s defenses and leave it aching. Raphael would rather spend
time with that human than with me. I guess it was my own fault. I was the one
who distanced myself from Raph because I was afraid of what my feelings would
mean.
I was pulled from my thoughts as a hand grabbed one of my wrists and pulled it
off the strong, sinuous shoulder. “Thanks, bro. I think I’m good.” Raph
muttered. I lifted my other hand and he stood, turning to face me. His
expression was very serious, as was his tone-of-voice. “You don’t like Casey,
do you?”
I shifted and looked away, unsure of how to answer. “It’s not that Raph, I
mean, he’s a nice guy, but he gets himself into trouble and that worries me.
Not only that, but you let your adventures with him take time away from your
family.”
“And what would you have me do, Leo? Stay here with you guys all day, every
day? Training and playing video games, and punching the bag, and sitting in
boredom? I’d go nuts! You know I have to go topside to let it all out, Leo!”
“You could always go with one of us.” I said, my voice so quiet, even I could
barely hear it. I stared at the floor, not wanting to see the look in Raph’s
eyes as he told me that I didn’t understand.
But those words never came.
“Why are you telling me all this?” he asked.
I spoke slowly and carefully, my gaze riveted to the floor beneath my feet.
“Because I don’t want you to get so focused on your friends that you leave your
family behind.” I tried to keep the bitterness and sorrow out of my voice, but
I couldn’t. I turned and made a hasty exit, moving fast and silently out into
the sewers. I dimly heard his voice calling after me, but I didn’t look back.
I wandered aimlessly through the sewers for quite some time, thinking about
what I’d said. Raph was probably confused as to why I ran off and he was bound
to ask me about it when I returned.
“Well what the hell do I say?” I grumbled to myself, “Raph, I’ve been in love
with you since we were fourteen, and your friendship with Casey Jones makes me
jealous? That sounds so perverted! Not to mention possessive!”
There was a soft shuffle of movement, and I whipped around. My heart dropped to
the pit of my stomach. Holy shit. It was Raphael. He’d heard what I just said.
His eyes were the size of saucers. No. This wasn’t supposed to happen!
“Raph I…” I stuttered hopelessly, unable to speak.
Raph cut me off with a low rumble. “Is it true?”
“Well-I-uh-I, um, I-”
“Leonardo, is it true?” He repeated, more sternly this time.
I lowered my head, a few tears running unchecked down my cheeks at the
rejection that my heart knew was coming. I nodded with a snivel. I couldn’t
look at him. I knew I’d see only disgust and betrayal on his face.
“Leo.” He called, trying to get me to look at him. “Leo, please.” He said, his
voice soft and sweeter than honey.
My heart clenched in pain. No, this was worse than hate, or laughter. I would
not be able to bear it if he pitied me. I fell to the ground and pulled my
knees into my chest, hiding my face and my tears.
In moments, I could feel Raph kneeling by my side. “I’m so sorry Raph. I never
meant for you to hear that. You must think I’m a sick, perverted…” I would have
gone on, but Raph interrupted me.
“No, Leo…I….I don’t know how to say this. You know I’ve never been good with
words…or expressing my emotions nondestructively. But I—” he reached out and
put a hand on my shoulder. “It’s not just you.” He whispered.
Those soft, gentle words, made me look up at him, daring to hope, unsure
whether I’d heard correctly. Ever so slowly he wrapped his arms around my
carapace and pressed our foreheads together. He was kneeling, so in this
position he was slightly taller. His bright green eyes stared down into my dark
blue ones. I tensed a little as Raph shifted. My eyes went wide as he pressed
out beaks together into a sloppy, yet chaste version of a human kiss. My
eyelids flicked closed and my arms flew up around his neck, pulling him further
into the kiss. I’d wanted this for so long.
It was so surreal that part of me doubted whether or not this was really
happening. I was flying. I just couldn’t believe it. It had to be a dream. But
even if it was, I couldn’t bring myself to care. I pushed my younger brother
backward, until he rolled onto his carapace, wasting no time in pinning him
down, pouring more and more vigor into the kiss. Raphael moaned in abandon and
broke the kiss, throwing his head back and exposing his neck. I wasted no time.
Neither of us knew when next we’d be able to do this again.
I nibbled my way down his neck, keeping a careful record of Raph’s responses.
My gentle, teasing nips must have found a soft spot because the next thing I
knew Raph was putty in my hands. My fingers felt frantically up and down his
sides as I reached into his shell. My mouth moved down his neck to his
shoulders. I canted my head with curiosity and leaned down to run my tongue
over Raph’s scar. The result was a deep, throaty churr that made heat pool in
my abdomen. God, Raphael made the sexiest noises imaginable! My shell grew
tight, but I took deep breaths, trying to resist the urge to drop down.
I jumped, then relaxed as I felt Raph’s hands moving up my thighs, his fingers
reaching out to tug teasingly on my tail. I couldn’t retain the churr that came
rumbling out of my chest at the action. My cock dropped down as my control was
momentarily commandeered by my younger brother.
Raph smirked. But it wasn’t his usual smirk. No, this smirk was darker,
dirtier. This smirk promised mischief and no small amount of innuendo.
Fingers ghosted hauntingly over my cock, fingers that weren’t mine. Slowly, my
gaze moved downwards. Raphael had flipped us over, meaning he was currently on
top. Suddenly, the sensation ghosting fingers vanished. My eyes stared
unabashedly as Raph grabbed hold of my stiff member with his right hand and
slowly began to pump.
I threw my head backward and moaned. I had pleasured myself many times, sitting
on my bed, panting Raph’s name as my hand rushed over my throbbing cock. But
never had the sensations been this intense.
With Raphael, everything was intense. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t careful.
There was subtle softness in each of his touches, the gentle essence that was
Raphael. My incredibly intense, soft hearted younger brother. Raph’s pumps grew
steadily more insistent and I moaned. I moaned repeatedly, deeply, passionately
as my younger brother jacked me off. The other emerald green hand ventured up
and pulled me towards him. I took advantage of the opportunity to catch Raph
off guard, using my shoulders and my legs o flip us over. Once I was once again
situated atop my brother I crushed my lips to his.
It was the wettest, most tongue-twisting, most passionate kiss I had ever
experienced in my life. Shit, Raph was a good kisser. Some time mid-kiss
Raphael had resumed his pumps, only at a harder and faster pace. We broke the
kiss in time for me to look down and see Raph’s hand flying over my cock before
everything exploded into a world of white.
When my eyes opened, I did a double take. Raphael was really here. It wasn’t a
dream. He was here, smiling down at me. I couldn’t help but smile
wholeheartedly back at him. Then I noticed the bulge beneath his plastron.
“You didn’t…”
“No.”
I moved toward him and he moved back a little. If it weren’t for the smile on
his face I probably would have thought he was regretting what had just taken
place, but he was smiling and he was quick to reassure me.
“Don’t worry about me, Leo. I’ll take care of it later.”
“But it isn’t fair…You…”
“I said don’t worry, Leo. And it isn’t about fair. In my book a relationship is
not all fair, it’s also about making sacrifices for you partner. C’mon, let’s
head home.” He stated.
I frowned and reached out, pulling him close to me. I pressed my plastron to
his carapace and whispered into his ear, “I want to. Please?”
He glanced back at me hesitantly, but after a few moments he caved. I stepped
around him and sank to my knees. When a few moments passed with no response I
cooed, “Raphie, please drop down for me?”
With one last hesitation, my younger brother finally dropped down. His dick was
overall slightly shorter than mine, but it was thick and strong, like the rest
him. I smiled at the blush that tinged his emerald green cheeks.
Ever so slowly I reached out and grabbed hold of the shaft. I really had no
idea how hard or fast Raph liked it, so I started slow. After the first few
slow pumps, Raph, too, sank his knees. He lay back and spread his legs just
enough that I could effectively straddle them. I happily accepted the change of
position.
My hand languidly pumped my brother’s throbbing member. I watched with lust
filled eyes as Raph moaned and whimpered beneath me, my tender ministrations
bringing him nearly to the brink, then, like waves on a shore, pulling back.
Raph let out a frustrated moan as that ecstasy eluded him once again. The moan
became a whimper as I slowed my pumps even more, squeezing tightly as my
fingers moved up and down the stiff rod.
“Leo.” He murmured, his voice breathy and weak from the amount of unrelieved
pressure in his groin. “Please…” Raph whispered, his voice and eyes pleading.
Who could say no to that voice? Without warning I sped up my thrusts to the
point where my hand was a blur over my brother’s dick. Raphael let out a cry as
he came, my hand milking his dick. But just as he started to come down from his
high I resumed pumping. My hand moved fast and hard up and down Raph’s member.
I watched as a layer of sweat formed on Raph’s brow. He whimpered and his face
scrunched up, tears of tension gathering at the corners of his eyes. I watched
with my eyes glued to him as he twisted, writhed, and shook from the over-
stimulation. “Leo,” he whined, overwhelmed by the heightened sensations. A long
minute later, just when I thought Raph had had enough, I felt the muscles in
the stiff rod twitch and Raphael’s eyes shot open. “LEO!” He cried wantonly as
his hips thrust upward into my hand. Raph’s eyes screwed shut and his lips
parted, his back arching as he came for a second time.
He was absolutely beautiful.
I gently milked his dick as he moaned his completion until he collapsed,
utterly spent, his chest rising and falling rapidly with his panting breaths.
A few minutes of silence ensued until, “I love you.” I stated, the words
rolling off my tongue before I could stop them. I turned away from him,
inwardly cursing myself. It was far to soon for…
“I love you, too.” He whispered.
I whirled around to stare at him. He chuckled at my astonishment. “I already
told ya I felt the same ‘bout ya.” Raph said. His exhaustion seemed to have
made his drawl thicken slightly. I sputtered, not knowing what to say. Raph
smiled with understanding and said, “C’mon bro, let’s go home.”
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