Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/12389121.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Durarara!!
  Relationship:
      Heiwajima_Shizuo/Orihara_Izaya
  Character:
      Heiwajima_Shizuo
  Additional Tags:
      Alternate_Universe_-_High_School, Teacher-Student_Relationship, Spanking,
      Masochism, Corporal_Punishment, Kinda, Developing_Relationship, Slow
      Burn, Obsessive_Behavior, Bratting, anger_issues, Abandonment_Issues,
      Teacher_Shizuo, Student_Izaya, Dom/sub, Angst, My_fav, Shizaya_-
      Freeform, Attachment_Issues, Tags_will_be_added, Izaya_is_not_good_at
      taking_rejection!, Izaya_is_a_baaad_student, Like_literally_the_worst,
      Child_Neglect, Dysfunctional_Relationships, Dysfunctional_Family,
      Strangers_to_Friends_to_Lovers
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-10-17 Updated: 2018-03-11 Chapters: 7/? Words: 35003
****** Extinction ******
by CandleCucumbers
Summary
     Izaya Orihara, a problem child, has been transferred from school to
     school, his parents never being able to find one that would take
     until they finally sent Izaya to Raira Academy, a private institution
     where order and rules are taken very seriously.
     Izaya soon develops a very strange and undeniably dysfunctional
     relationship with his teacher Shizuo Heiwajima, who is a hardass that
     gets on Izaya's nerves constantly but; he's the only one capable of
     giving Izaya something no one else ever can. Shizuo doesn't know that
     his particular methods for discipline in detention are Izaya's
     favorite part about school, until one day he does find out.
     What happens as a result will either make them or break them.
Notes
     This work is based on a shizaya oneshot I wrote about four years ago.
     It's about as bad as you'd expect a high schooler to write. I was
     reading over it recently (half a year ago) and felt like rewriting
     and expanding it so here we are, making it into a multi chapter fic!
     Please keep note: I've been drafting up this fic for a few months now
     and have only now started shaping and editing it.
     As more chapters come out, I'll eventually post the link to my old
     fic on tumblr. It's enjoyably bad if you're just looking for a laugh.
     Hope you actually enjoy this version though. Will update tags as I go
     along. Please have fun reading!
***** Chapter 1 *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Orihara Izaya was a good student, an exemplary one at that. In fact, he was one
of the top students in his class at the prestigious private school Raira
Academy. That is, he used to be. It was one of the best institutions in the
city although it has been criticized for its ‘traditional’ approaches in some
of the classrooms, Izaya’s parents thought it was best to send him there after
having tried so many different schools before that couldn't control him.
He sits in his Biology class, bored out of his mind, chin resting in the palm
of his hand staring off into the middle distance cursing his decision to come
to class at all. He expected a private school to be extremely boring and he
wasn’t exactly wrong. Sure, there were plenty of interesting humans to meddle
with and manipulate, spoiled brats or rebellious brats, all kinds really. But
he’d seen enough of the same by now, it’s all grown rather tiresome and bland.
Everything was just too easy here.
All except one thing. The one thing that would never get old or boring, and he
was going to be seeing him soon. When the bell rings, Izaya is the first one
out the door, escaping the mind-numbing torture these people call an education.
There was a little pep in his step as he heads towards his last class. He
breezes by Shinra, who’s taking books out of his locker.
“Hey, Izaya wait a minute!” Shinra shuts his locker and runs after him carrying
more books than he should.
“Sorry Shinra, I have to get to my next class, some of us take school very
seriously,” he says as he continues his pace.
“That’s real rich!” Shinra calls out to him as Izaya vanishes among the crowd
of students.
Izaya reaches his classroom but is disappointed to find that he's not the first
one there this time. He goes to his seat and set his eyes on his favorite and
least favorite thing about this wretched place. Heiwajima Shizuo.
Or maybe he really should start calling him Heiwajima Sensei by now. The
freakishly tall 27 year-old man standing at his desk was a force to be reckoned
with, even for Izaya. The bright yellow of his hair was like a beacon in the
dark, always the first person you would notice in a crowd. He's lanky at first
glance but Izaya has watched closely enough to notice the sinewy muscle in his
forearms on the days he has his sleeves rolled up. He's flipping through some
pages of his binder completely unaware of Izaya’s stare. Or maybe he's
pretending not to notice.
Looks aside, Shizuo is a menace to the school, or maybe he’s speaking too
broadly. In reality, he’s a menace to Izaya. He almost never fails to get in
the way of his truancy or other plans. Whenever he’s caught, not only is he
forced to return to class but he’s forced to stay after school to “catch up” on
what he missed. Like Izaya needs extra time to learn this rudimentary bullshit.
Shizuo’s bright hair falls slightly over his eyes, in total disarray, strands
stick out in all directions, like he literally rolled out of bed and went
straight to class. It's a devastatingly good look on him. The idiot has
probably never heard of a comb by the effort he seems to put into his own
appearance but the way he looks, as a result, is simply... unfair. It couldn't
be more flattering on him. The first two buttons of his shirt are undone,
showing the hollow of his throat. Izaya’s gaze trails shamelessly down the
man’s body, ignoring the rest of the people filing into the classroom.
Finally Shizuo does look up at him, and a disdainful scowl settles over his
features. Izaya laughs quietly to himself, a face like that shouldn’t be
twisted in such a way, but he won’t complain about the effect he has on him.
Shizuo looks away first. He takes off his glasses and sits down on the edge of
his desk to wait for everyone to be seated. Izaya can’t help but feel smug
about that too.
He may be one of the more attractive faculty members, but he’s also one of the
most feared. He isn't like any human Izaya knows, it's a wonder the man
completed a career path with the kind of brutish temper he has. Not only did
Shizuo have the world's shortest fuse, but he displayed that anger with
complete abandon. He rules his classes with an iron fist, zero tolerance for
insolence and class disruption. The smallest snide comment or jest could get a
whole desk thrown at you. He was someone Izaya had trouble fooling, much less
controlling.
A part of him hates Shizuo on principle for that. His violent nature and
unusual strength are also something to frown upon because of how inhuman it is.
But another part of him is fascinated by it.
Shizuo has very unorthodox ideas about discipline in the classroom. He's one of
the only teachers that resorts to a paddle in very...extreme cases. That’s what
makes getting into trouble with Shizuo so very fun. The common offenses usually
landed kids in average detention. But the ones that get in fights, vandalize,
or are caught with drugs get sent to Shizuo. Needless to say, none of his
students ever misbehave. Except for Izaya of course.
Being what Izaya’s parents call a ‘trouble child’ they thought this school
would be the best fit for a lost cause like him, especially when they heard
about how the rules were enforced here. He scoffed at the thought. That sort of
backfired didn’t it, mom, and dad?
Izaya was notorious for being the only student who’d been sent to Shizuo more
than three times. Everyone else had done everything in their power to stay in
Shizuo’s good graces after those detentions. Not Izaya.
He would never admit it to anyone, not even Shinra, but every time he got
himself into trouble, every time he’d have to stay after class to receive his
punishment, every time that paddle came down-
“Orihara-san.”
Izaya snapped back to reality and looked up to see his teacher standing over
him with his arms crossed, the class filled with heavy silence.
“Oh, good. You’ve finally decided to join us back on earth. I won’t say it
again, pay attention.” Shizuo says gruffly before resuming his lecture. Izaya
stares back at him, a little startled and he exhales slowly. Ok, maybe
attraction does have something to do with it. He needs it again, damn it. He
needs to get in trouble and feel the force those arms have while wielding a
paddle. The class goes on and Izaya doesn't take his eyes off of him.
Occasionally Shizuo will look back at him, eyes narrowed in contempt before
turning away. Thirty minutes later, Izaya hasn't taken down a single note and
decides he's had enough. He turns in his seat to face Masaomi Kida the guy who
sits behind him.
“Hey Masaomi-kun, what’s up?" He whispers with a wink, "isn't this lecture just
boring you to tears?”
Kida blinks dumbly at first but then his expression turns into horror. “Are you
insane? Don’t talk to me during class!” he hisses angrily and quietly, his eyes
dart to their teacher and back to Izaya.
Izaya giggles, not trying to be discrete at all. “Don’t be silly, nothing is
going to happen whilst we have a spineless teacher like Shizu-chan here. How’s
your girlfriend doing? What was her name again? You two are becoming quite
serious aren’t you?”
As Izaya continues his one-sided chat, Kida and other students fall silent in
anticipation for what's to come. He hears footsteps and then Izaya is struck
hard in the back of the head with a book. Hardcover. Ouch.
“Now that was totally uncalled for,” Izaya says, rubbing the growing bump on
his head, emulating the perfect victim.
“Orihara-san...I know I don't need to tell you to keep your mouth shut during
lecture,” the man spoke rough and strained, clearly losing his patience by the
second. With slow controlled movements, he removes his glasses and tucks them
into his shirt pocket.
Izaya smiles brightly, “I'm very sorry Shizu-chan, I understand that but you
see, Masaomi-kun and I were in the middle of a conversation. As a matter of
fact, we were discussing this class and how utterly pointless it is.” All the
while, Shizuo’s eyes are locked on his with a smoldering intensity. Izaya
imagines all the things he must want to say to him in that moment. “Right
Masaomi-kun?”
Shizuo slams his hands on the desk. Shizuo bends down and gets in Izaya’s face,
every muscle in his body seemed coiled to attack. Izaya prides himself in not
flinching.
“Ori..hara…” Izaya appreciates the sound of him struggling to control himself.
“Do not call me that.” It must be one of his good days because he definitely
would have gone berserk by now! He is a little surprised he’s even trying to be
civil. Izaya meets his eyes challengingly but then he sighs and looks down,
“Sorry, Sensei.”
He turns in his seat to face the front. Shizuo squints at him in disbelief and
waits for something else but to his surprise, Izaya stays silent. He slowly
straightens up and walks away. Izaya smirks when Shizuo foolishly turns his
back on him. He really should have known better than that. Before he loses his
chance, he sprints to the closest window and undoes the latch,
“Forget it, I think I’m going home early today. Bye, Shizu-chan!” He calls out
to his favorite teacher before climbing out.
"What the hell is your problem, brat?!” Shizuo sneers when he makes it in time
to yank him back by the scruff of his collar before Izaya can jump.
Izaya laughs loudly like he just told a joke,"I already told you, idiot! Your
class is pointless!”
                                  ----------
Later that evening, in detention Izaya sits patiently in his seat humming an
upbeat tune while Shizuo clears his desk wearing another one of his famous
scowls. After the whole incident earlier, Shizuo had screamed in his face that
he had detention and then promptly escorted him to the office himself. It was
quite the scene.
“Shizu-chan, please don’t make faces like that all the time. You’ll age
faster,” he drawls slowly.
“I told you to stop fucking calling me that," Shizuo retorts.
"Shizu-chan! A teacher should be a better influence on his students than that.”
“Don't give me that fake bullshit of yours. I’m serious.”
Izaya feels elated hearing him speak that way. He thinks he might be the only
one who can see the callous side of his professor. Well, the more callous side
anyway. He watches with growing excitement as Shizuo takes the paddle out of
the bottom drawer of his desk, he doesn’t look nearly as happy about this as
Izaya feels.
"You know the drill,” Shizuo gestures towards the desk.
"Of course," Izaya complies happily, walking to the large desk and bending
over, placing his hands flat on the surface.
He rests his head on the cool mahogany wood and waits for the exhilarating pain
of his "punishment". He recalls all the times he nearly came from being
spanked, he always had trouble staying quiet through it all. A smirk creeps
along his face as he remembers. He knows Shizuo only does this for the sake of
being a teacher, he knows this isn’t supposed to be in any way sexual. But that
doesn’t mean Izaya can’t enjoy himself in secret.
After a few moments of no pain, he gets impatient. "Hello? I have somewhere to
be after this."
“Drop your pants.”
Eh?
He looks back at Shizuo in confusion but the stone-cold expression on his face
tells him he's completely serious. Despite the spike of fear and the pounding
in his heart, he obediently reaches down to unzip his pants and pulls them down
to his thighs.
“Your boxers too...”
Izaya’s mouth falls open but he doesn’t breathe. He swears he didn’t just hear
that come out of Shizu-chan’s mouth but he still pulls down his boxers, anyway.
Izaya is completely bare now.
He isn’t even given time to let this sink in before he feels a hard slap on his
ass. He’s disoriented for a minute, eyes wide and blinking hard, slowly
processing what just happened and how it felt. At the next smack on his bum, he
exhales sharply, releasing the breath he forgot he’d been holding and from then
on he can’t really control it. It’s still as hard as the first. He breathes
through his nose and rests his head on his folded hands. Any words he had to
tease Shizuo about this have dissolved completely and he is still surprised
when Shizuo strikes him a third time. He’s using his hands, his hands.
It feels so different, Shizuo’s palm against his bare skin. It’s so much
hotter, there’s a sharper edge of pain that runs up his spine, rendering him
hard and shaking. Shizuo is still efficient with his process, blunt strokes
that leave a strong impact and don’t linger once. Izaya gasps for air as
quietly as he can, so as to not betray how much this is affecting him.
“You think it’s funny to endanger yourself for attention, Orihara?” Izaya is
pulled out of his trance and thrust into confusion.
“What?” Shizuo brings a hand down on his ass hard, making him cry out.
“That stunt you pulled today wasn’t just annoying, it was plain stupid. Even
for you.” Aww, Shizu-chan is worried? That’s going in for the books.
“Don’t be silly, I would have landed fine.” It's true, Izaya has landed from
heights like that all the time.
“If you say so.” Another smack that makes Izaya’s whole body curve in on
itself. "Sorry, was that one a little too hard for you?" He needs this to stop
now, Izaya is completely hard and if Shizuo keeps going, he fears he might
actually come from being spanked this time. He presses himself as close to the
desk as possible to hide his aching erection.
Shizuo starts an unrelenting, pattern of blows to each cheek. His skin grows
increasingly sensitive, each concentrated slap hurting more than the last.
Izaya’s toes curl in his shoes and he’s barely keeping himself from sliding off
the desk he’s bent over. This is so much more than Shizuo usually dishes out
and Izaya would be alarmed if he weren’t so aroused. Shizuo smacks him again
but his rhythm breaks and his blow veers slightly down to the swell of his ass
where his thighs meet. It startles Izaya and he lets out a high staccato cry.
He bites his bottom lip and his face burns with dread and humiliation. Shizuo
heard that, had to have known what it was. Izaya is suddenly aware that Shizuo
has stopped.
“I’ll wait outside and let you get dressed Orihara-san. I hope this is the last
time I’ll be seeing you in detention.” Shizuo says briskly and walks out of the
room. If he had noticed Izaya’s arousal, he certainly didn’t show it. Izaya
pulls himself back together and puts his pants back on. He awkwardly hides his
erection with his school bag as he rushes past Shizuo and speed walks to the
nearest bathroom.
When he’s finally alone in a stall, he drops his pants again and jerks himself
off to the thought of Shizuo, and his hands, being bent over on his desk, every
single blow. He shuts his eyes and comes hard.
Chapter End Notes
     WOOH! First chapter finally posted <3
***** Chapter 2 *****
Chapter Summary
     Slow burn starts now muahaha.
Chapter Notes
     Thank you so much for all your comments! I'm beyond amazed you guys
     already like it this much :') I knew I had to post the first chapter
     in order to get on my feet.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Izaya’s ass is sore and bruised for at least a week and a half. It’s a problem
in that it’s a constant reminder of what he experienced and it compromises his
composure every single day, especially when he’s forced to remain seated for
hours at school. Sometimes it's from discomfort, sometimes it's just the sheer
arousal that pangs low in his stomach.
When it’s too unbearable he skips a few periods the next day and hides up on
the roof of the school. He knows now when and where to skip so he won’t get
caught by Shizuo. He replays their last encounter over and over again in his
mind lost in the heat of it. What the hell possessed Shizuo to do that? He's
not complaining, he just never thought Shizuo had it in him.
Nevertheless, Shizuo has changed everything. Izaya is hooked in deeper now. He
got so much more than he bargained for and he won't settle for less. His desire
for that irreplaceable pain triples.
Izaya skips practically whenever he feels like it, more now that he's
recovering but he never skips Shizuo’s classes; he wouldn’t miss that for the
world.
Kida gives him a sympathetic look at the end of the day when Izaya sits down
with a wince. Class starts and like usual, Izaya doesn’t take his eyes off his
professor ever. He smirks whenever Shizuo’s gaze meets his. But Izaya is going
to behave himself. At least until his ass heals and he feels the urge to be
under Shizuo’s hands again. Shizuo scans the room every now and then to make
sure people are paying attention and his eyes fall on Izaya again. Izaya shifts
in his seat and is sure to make the flash of pain visible on his face. Shizuo
looks away immediately and moves the lecture along, his expression carefully
blank, as he reads the notes on the projector.
 
 
A few days later Izaya is spending time in his room with Shinra. He’s sitting
on a cushion, leaning against his bedroom window reading a magazine. Why he
doesn’t just lie on his bed is nobody’s business. Izaya finds it hard to
concentrate when he has to listen to Shinra’s incessant babbling about Shizuo’s
unnatural abilities while doing his AP biology homework. Izaya never invites
him over; he just shows up and walks in like he lives there. Shinra is a
presence he can never seem to get rid of but Izaya doesn’t really mind it. With
his parents never home and twin sisters off doing whatever it is nine-year-olds
do, he actually likes the company. He is essentially the only person he might
ever consider a friend.
“It’s incredible, I've never heard of another person in history that is capable
of the things Sensei can do. It’s just impossible! The rumors of what he did
when he went to school alone…”
“There you have it, rumors. Nothing more.” Izaya has read all of them online
already but they're all so preposterous he'd need to find proof or see it for
himself.
“Assuming there’s nothing special about the fibers in his muscle, I would need
to assume this is a result of overproduction of adrenaline or something. The
amount his body would need on a daily basis to maintain that level of strength
is just-"
Izaya groans, tilting his head back with the magazine covering his face. Shinra
ignores him.
"He should really volunteer himself to science, or at least donate his body
after he dies. Can you imagine the kind of discoveries we could make?”
“We?” Izaya says unimpressed.
“Humanity, I mean. For example, Heiwajima Sensei’s genes could contain a number
of very interesting anomalies. I mean how did this happen? Could it be some
sort of mutation? There’s so much we could learn from just a blood sample,”
Shinra sighs the last part wistfully.
Izaya’s snicker turns into a laugh in spite of himself, “do you hear yourself,
Shinra? I mean, you’re obsessed. Besides, I’m sure he’d happily give you a
sample if you just ask nicely.”
“Hah, that’s funny,” Shinra smiles at the sarcasm. It’s a genuine smile, all of
them always are. If there’s anyone close to being as obsessed with Shizuo as
Izaya, it’s probably Shinra but for entirely different and obvious reasons.
Izaya always finds himself listening to these long-winded rants and though he
couldn’t care less about knowing the reason Shizuo is a monster, he still
listens. Izaya loves to dominate a conversation any day, but when it comes to
the subject of Shizuo, he hardly speaks a word about him.
“Anyway, all it would take is one window of opportunity,” Shinra says with a
strange glint in his eye. It’s Izaya’s turn to sigh now.
“Why are we talking about this, again? We all know how strong he is.” Izaya
knows better than anyone.
“Because of the incident this morning, he threw a desk at Okada!” Shinra
reminds him, “thank god he missed, the desk was blown to pieces.”
“Oh right," Izaya says with more interest. "Wish I’d seen that one. Don’t you
love seeing the monster all riled up?”
“It’s quite a sight. I heard Okada-san got a week’s detention for what he did,”
Shinra says absentmindedly.
“A whole week?” Izaya sits up, wincing.
“Yes. I don’t envy him at all,” Shinra says distractedly. “So, Izaya, since
you’re the only person to have seen Shizuo, uh, reach that state more times
than anyone in the whole school, well maybe you could get a sample for me? You
already provoke him enough as it is, what’s just this one little favor going to
do?”
That simpleton gets a whole week and Izaya just gets one measly day? Izaya’s
track record is way more destructive than his. What did Okada do exactly? Izaya
wonders what it would be to endure all that for a week, the ache would last so
much longer. Is he doing this to everybody now or just Izaya? Probably the
latter, since there would be a considerable number of complaints from parents.
He doesn’t like the thought of Shizuo doing that to someone else but he doesn’t
know why.
“Izaya? Hello?” Shinra waves his arm dramatically in front of Izaya’s face.
“What? Oh.” Izaya processes what he just heard and shakes his head, “you are
just unbelievable Shinra, you’d ask me to sacrifice myself for your little
science project? And suffer the gruesome consequences?” Izaya accuses
mockingly.
“You don’t mind it right? It’s never stopped you before,” Shinra smiles his
stupid smile and shrugs.
Izaya instantly frowns.
                                  ----------
As eager as he is to infuriate Shizuo, Izaya is not about to go around sticking
him with needles. However, two weeks have passed l and Izaya’s bruises have
faded yellow. The pain is only dull now and he’s been craving more ever since
the last time. He stalls just a little longer than usual, being a good student
and allowing Shizuo a false sense of security. Then, he starts acting like
himself again, taking every opportunity to undermine him.
“Wait, Sensei, that doesn’t really make sense.”
“What doesn’t make sense?” It’s hardly a question; Shizuo looks like he wants
to rip his throat out.
“Well, you’re assigning us this book to read but I don’t see how it has
anything to do with what you’re teaching us.”
“That’s not my problem. You have an issue with the curriculum, you can complain
about it to someone else.”
The rest of the students are either staring at Izaya or avoiding looking
anywhere near Shizuo. They sit silently waiting for this to either blow up or
keel over.
“It’s just I’m worried this might be a waste of my precious time,” he says with
a polite tone, albeit one that isn’t fooling anybody.
“Another word out of you, and you are out. Do you hear me?” His hands are
gripping the edge of his desk behind him so hard, Izaya swears he can hear the
wood creaking in protest. His eyes flit from his knuckles and back to Shizuo’s
burning eyes. His heart races.
“It’s a stupid idea, Shizu-chan. The stuff that makes you want to leap out a
window.” He chuckles, “I know it hurts but it's for your own good and the good
of the cl-”
He dodges the book Shizuo throws just in time for it to miss his face, it hits
the corner of Kida’s desk behind him, he knows because he hears his startled
shriek.
“The office. Go now. Kida-san, please accompany him to make sure he doesn't
scurry away.”
Izaya grins widely at him. Shizuo is nice enough to get his things for him,
although he throws them on the ground outside of class. He feels Shizuo’s glare
burning a hole in his back as he leaves.
On their way to the office, he notices Kida frowning at him.
“What is it?”
“N-nothing. It’s just, I don't get you. Why would you get in his way so much?
He's crazy scary.”
“Because I hate him, and maybe because he gets in my way?” Izaya offers with a
smile.
Kida’s frown deepens, “Huh? Hey, wait… the office is this way.”
“I know which way it is," he whispers theatrically, walking backwards into the
adjacent hall towards the exit. "See you later!”
“No, no,” Kida pleads, face growing pale, “no, no, no, don't do this to me,
please. He told me to take you to the office, he'll kill me if I don't!!”
Izaya snickers at that, “don't be so dramatic, he won't do anything like that
to you.” He might kill me though, he thinks as he calls it a day and strolls
home.
There's no one home to pick up when the school calls to report his misconduct,
no adults anyway. So he spends the rest of the day however he pleases and gets
ready for school the next morning, fully prepared to face Shizuo’s wrath with
open arms.
What actually happens next is deeply disturbing in that nothing happens. He's
sent to detention right that day, sure, but not with Shizuo. Shizuo didn’t give
him the time of day when class ended. He'd been given a boring lecture, and
then sent to boring detention. That's when Izaya realizes that something is
seriously very wrong.
He does all kinds of things for the next few days. Things that, at a different
point in time, would have meant an automatic detention from Shizuo. And...While
he still gets yelled at and sent to the office every single time, he’s never
asked to stay after class with him. It’s starting to become extremely
frustrating. Either Izaya is losing his touch, a thought he doesn’t even want
to entertain, or Shizuo is going through some midlife crisis or something.
Izaya can't wrap his head around it. He knows just how miserable he’s made
Shizuo’s life ever since he transferred here late last year. Shizuo is a huge
hard ass about rules and respect, and Izaya knows what his defiance means to
him. So, why wouldn’t Shizuo be jumping on the next chance to punish him for
his actions? It’s so bizarre that even the rest of the class thinks impending
doom awaits them all when Shizuo finally blows. He has to.
Another week goes by without incident, even when he creates a debacle every
single day in his class.
Fine. If Shizuo is seriously playing hard to get right now then Izaya has no
problem upping the stakes. He was never one to back down from a challenge, the
last thing he did was so over the top, it only makes sense he’d need to go that
far again if he wants to get some results.
Izaya scrolls through his phone and decides to have a very loud and personal
conversation on a sex hotline in the middle of Shizuo’s class. Izaya thinks
this will be his ticket because some of the students even giggle from the
audacity of it, Shizuo hates when other students encourage immaturity. But to
his disappointment, all he does is walk up to him with an unamused expression.
“Get out,” Shizuo says curtly.
Izaya mouths 'I'm busy,' pointing at his phone and stays put. Izaya stares back
at him unflinchingly while continuing his conversation with the gravelly voiced
woman on the phone telling him a number of nasty things. He smirks as he
listens to her and says, "my, my, what a depraved woman you are. Do you know
what I would do?"
Shizuo suddenly hauls him out of his seat by his sleeve and shoves him out of
the classroom forcing him to end the call. "Shizu-chan, that was important!" He
dumps his bag on him shortly after.
“Office, now.” Shizuo says before slamming the door.
It shakes Izaya to the core. He stands there for a moment, staring at Shizuo
through the window of the door clearly ignoring him and resuming class. There
can only be one explanation for this. Shizuo must have figured it out, he had
to have realized how much Izaya liked what he did to him, must have known what
that moan really was. Why couldn't he just keep his mouth shut like he did all
the other times before?? Now Shizuo's decided to be disgustingly noble about
this situation and cease any and all interaction between them. The punishment
he's loved so much for so long, gone just like that. Izaya shouldn’t be
surprised Shizuo is pretending to be a normal person all of a sudden. But
that’s not really who he is at all. Shizuo is a hard, rough, and unsentimental.
Izaya knows it better than anybody.
Against his better judgment, he follows his teacher as he's walking to his car
after school. Shizuo walks across the parking lot lighting up a cigarette as he
goes, not paying any mind to the angry student storming towards him. Izaya
catches up just as he opens the car door.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Izaya demands with a sneer.
“Excuse me?” Shizuo whips his head around with narrowed eyes. He faces him
completely and places a hand on the top of the door.
“I joked about you being spineless before but now I’m starting to actually
believe it’s true,” that makes Shizuo sneer, his fingers tightening on his
cigarette. “Are you seriously going to let everything I did in there go?”
“I didn’t let it go, I sent you to the office to be dealt with,” Shizuo said
slowly like Izaya was stupid.
“Oh please. Like you think they know anything about keeping me in check? This
isn't like you, turning your back on a student,” his arms are crossed, his
voice laced with venom.
“No. Clearly, they don’t. And clearly, my method isn’t really doing the job
either, is it?” Shizuo leans closer to his face, anger burning in his hazel
eyes. “You are entitled, Izaya-kun. You're not going to have your way anymore,
I won’t have it,” Shizuo spits out. Izaya remains stock still. He’s not going
to incriminate himself in anything any farther than he already has so he forces
a carefree laugh instead and smiles dryly up at him.
“I guess you need to find a better method soon then because I'm going to make
your life hell. You just gave me free reign to do whatever I want in your
classroom with absolutely no consequences. You think those normal detentions
are going to deter me in any way? I’ll just skip them. At this rate, I’m going
to be running your class myself.”
“Hey!” Shizuo barks. “Don’t. Push it. Your actions add up. There are real
consequences that go higher than me,” Shizuo says roughly. He finally leans
back and takes a long drag of his cigarette before flicking it at Izaya’s feet
and getting into his car. “If you keep this up, you might not like some of
them. Goodbye, Orihara-san.”
Shizuo shuts the door and drives off. Izaya keeps his smile in place until
Shizuo is gone and it falls immediately. He can always put up a good front but
Izaya can’t hold down his panic on the inside. Shizuo really isn't budging. In
that moment, he feels like an idiot, like some stupid kid begging for attention
who can easily be brushed off. Izaya thinks about the silly girls a year below
him who are secret admirers of Shizuo and it makes him literally sick to his
stomach. The cigarette lays at his feet slowly going out on its own.
He walks home alone in a heavy silence. Was that it? Is Izaya no longer capable
of provoking that side of Shizuo into action anymore? Shizuo saw right through
him, figured out how much he liked being hit. There’s no way he’s ever going to
punish him like that again. It’s exactly what any other teacher would do. He
thinks about all their encounters over and over. All the times he’s gotten the
better of him and vice versa. The sense of victory and adrenaline every time he
provoked him.
He walks home but he isn’t really looking where he’s going. After the initial
shock has passed, Izaya mostly feels anger now. Anger at Shizuo for messing up
what they had. Everything was so right before. Mostly, underneath it all, he
feels the scorching humiliation at being found out like that and then tossed
away. He doesn’t like being denied, especially not by someone who never denied
him before, and definitely not when the thing being denied is exactly what he
needs.
His feet stop walking on their own and he realizes he’s home. It’s been a few
hours now and the sky is darker. He’s strangely calm now. He’s come to a
conclusion; he’s not some average student, not by a long shot. He’s not some
meek little fanboy with a crush. Izaya does not and will not do denial. He
always gets what he wants, and that isn’t going to change anytime soon.
He walks into his house, sees fresh plates in the sink and knows his little
sisters have already been home. He heads up to his room, not bothering to make
himself dinner tonight.
Chapter End Notes
     Bet you didn't expect things to go this way lmao Sorry to those that
     wanted more smut like that again! Fear not though, I will deliver
     with the sexy times all in good time. Poor lil baby Izaya, I love
     writing how bad he is at relationships in general.
***** Chapter 3 *****
Chapter Summary
     The game begins and Izaya enjoys himself but will he reach his goal
     sooner or later? (Or ever?)
Chapter Notes
     Sooo sorry this is late! Tried to get two chapters in one go but that
     didn't work out. Long week it's been.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Izaya goes through school the next day with an air of easiness. Then comes last
period. He walks into the classroom and stops at Shizuo’s desk. His professor
looks stressed, leaning his forehead against his hand while typing evenly into
his computer.
“Go sit,” he orders crudely, not looking up.
“Shizu-chan, I’ve been um thinking about what you said, ” Shizuo’s shoulders
flinch with rage when Izaya uses the name but Izaya’s smooth, innocent tone
must have disarmed him. Izaya pauses and shifts innocuously closer speaking
low, “I've been thinking a lot about it and... I just wanted you to know how
truly screwed your life is going to be.”
He stops typing. Izaya backs away slowly, smirking from ear to ear, and sits in
his chair. Shizuo finally looks up and locks eyes with him. His expression is
oddly unreadable, the simmering anger is apparent but there’s something else he
can’t pinpoint. Izaya doesn’t care. Whatever it is, it means that Shizuo is now
paying attention. Izaya has let him know he’s not going to lie down like a dope
and get fucked over. He’s going to get what he wants and he wants Shizuo to
know it too.
Eventually Shizuo looks down at his desk, stands up, and starts setting things
up for the next class’s lecture.
And so it begins.
 
Izaya knows he has to be smart about this. He’s a clever boy, he wouldn't have
made it far if he wasn't. It’s very simple, a battle between his wits and
Shizuo’s self-control. If he plays his cards right, Shizuo will have no choice
but to give in. He’ll realize it can’t be helped and you just “gotta do what
you gotta do” or something stupid like that. Izaya knows it’s inevitable.
Monstrous anger like that isn’t meant to be subdued in the first place, Izaya
or no Izaya.
And he's not going to pull any punches just because Shizuo has. Over the course
of the week, he takes small steps he knows will constantly test Shizuo’s
patience, then gradually builds it up until it wears Shizuo down. He starts
with juvenile defiance, skipping even Shizuo’s classes, showing up late,
interrupting. But that’s just the beginning, He isn’t going to stop until he’s
tried everything.
Nothing happens yet and that’s fine because he can be patient. In the meantime,
he enjoys the tense, frustrated mess that is Shizuo. If he can manage to piss
him off early in the day, it leaves him like a ticking time bomb until the end
of it. The other people in Shizuo’s class are not fond of Izaya for this.
On one particular day, Shizuo is yelling and towering down over a student for
texting during class. Izaya can’t help himself.
“For goodness sake, Sensei if you woke up on the wrong side of bed it doesn’t
mean you have to take it out on your students,” Izaya says in a reasonable
tone.
“What was that? You wanna get in trouble too?” He snaps at him with anger.
“Nooo. Not at alll, I am only sticking up for my classmate.”
“Oh I get it. You wanna take your ‘buddy’s’ place in the office, how selfless
of you. Get out of my classroom.” Izaya gets up and does what he's been asked,
albeit not without wearing his favorite smug little smirk. Shizuo glares at
him, baring his teeth and Izaya leaves.
The more often he gets kicked out of class, the more material he misses, and
the farther behind he gets with his grades. He just sees it as one more way to
chip at Shizuo’s resolve. He doesn't like it when students fail.
 
At night, Izaya slips a slick hand down his shorts and imagines Shizuo ordering
him to take off his underwear again as he’s bent over a desk. The same smooth
surface. He pictures himself sensitive and hard already, expecting the solid
impact of Shizuo’s hand to come at any moment. And when he starts, he doesn’t
ever stop. His mind strays from thought to thought as he strokes himself fast.
Then, he imagines a hand reaching around and stroking his erection tightly-
Izaya pauses and opens his eyes. He shakes the thought away and continues
jerking off. Shizuo only spanks him in his fantasies, nothing more. He can
admire his appearance, he does it all the time and doesn't feel an ounce of
shame but the moment he draws the line at imagining them together that way.
It’s not because Shizuo is a man, it’s simply territory he prefers to not
venture into being as it could potentially destroy things even further than
they already are.
He thinks instead about what those merciless hands can do, what he knows they
can do. He can hardly think about anything else, especially now that it’s been
weeks since Shizuo last did what he did. Whenever he steps foot inside that
classroom, he remembers every detention with him he's ever had. He remembers
the last time, which now feels like it was ages ago, and it still makes him
want to get hard.
Izaya is frankly appalled at Shizuo for his actions. He never held back before,
and his punishments were practically guaranteed. But he just had to do
something so utterly mind-blowing to Izaya only to then rip it all away. What
kind of logic is that?! On top of that, Shizuo had to go and completely refuse
Izaya the way he did after the fact, refuse Izaya of all people. His pride and
his libido took a serious blow that day.
But this isn’t vengeance, not at all. He’s just doing what he always does.
Pursuing his goals to the end. When the time is right, Izaya strikes. He sneaks
into the school in the dead of night when no one else is around, except for
Shinra. He could tell Izaya was planning to do something dramatic and tagged
along with him against Izaya’s wishes.
“Wait Izaya, explain this to me again. What does that powertool have to do with
Sensei ‘knowing his place'? Where’d you even get one like that anyway?”
“Oh come on Shinra, as if you don’t know me at all.”
“There’s a lot of things you might do with a power saw, how am I supposed to
know?” He eyes the brand label on the saw in the bag with his flashlight.
“You’ll see for yourself, just stay quiet,” Izaya whispers as he picks the lock
to Shizuo’s empty classroom.
He walks over to Shizuo’s nice little desk and smooths his hands along it.
Then, he takes the bag from Shinra and plugs the tool into the wall. “Hold the
chair down for me,” he asks him. They turn it over and Izaya carefully saws
high into the back legs of Shizuo’s chair nearly all the way through. When he’s
done, he flips it off and unplugs it from the wall. He grins with delight at
Shinra and says in a sing-song voice, “he’s gonna kill me~.”
It finally lands him a detention. Izaya could not focus at all while he waited
for it to happen early that morning in first period trigonometry. He could
barely contain his excitement. And when he actually hears Shizuo’s thundering
shouts for him from two halls away he nearly falls out of his chair laughing.
The other students look around in confusion and their teacher paused in the
middle of a sentence. If only Izaya could have seen it happen with his own
eyes, his imagination alone is a riot. But Shizuo bursts into his class, face
flushed with not just anger but a little embarrassment more than makes up for
it. He's never seen this particular look on his face. Maybe he should get him
flustered more often.
“Excuse me, professor,” Shizuo addresses the other teacher bluntly, then storms
over to Izaya, “You and me, office, NOW.” He hauls him up and shuffles him out
of the class. “You’re gonna fucking pay for that,” he says when they’re in the
hall.
“Is that a date?”
“No. I meant you’re literally going to pay for that chair.”
“Oh... In that case, I'm an innocent man Shizu-chan! Whatever it is you think I
did, I didn't!”
“Fuck off, I know this was you, smartass louse.”
“Innocent until proven guilty. You’ve got the wrong guy, Shizu-chan,” he pleads
with mock sincerity.
Ah, yes, things are already starting to get back to normal, he thinks when he
strolls into Shizuo’s classroom after school. He is a little surprised it
happened so fast, but he’d never really thought the beast had that much
resolve, to begin with. He sees Shizuo has already gotten a replacement chair
for the one that snapped under his weight. Izaya dumps his bag in one of the
seats and stands there staring at Shizuo who’s flipping through papers and
looking into his desktop screen, tapping on keys.
“Take a seat and start your homework or something.”
Izaya just stares. “What?”
Shizuo finally looks up from his computer screen at him, “Go sit. Find
something to do with your time while you’re in detention.”
“You fucking bastard,” Izaya says under his breath. Izaya slowly backs away
from the desk.
“What did you say?” Shizuo retorts, finally giving him his full attention.
Izaya scoffs and grabs his bag.
“Forget it. I don't need to be here,” he says, walking to the door.
“Izaya,” Shizuo warns, loud and commanding. The tone, the voice, it's what
Izaya has always wanted to hear when he's aching with arousal. Despite himself,
he falters but only briefly, he refuses to be the plain, average nobody that
Shizuo is bent on making him so he keeps walking.
“Oi! Izaya!” Shizuo yells after him. He follows him out into the hall but Izaya
has already turned the next corner. “You can’t just leave detention whenever
you feel like it, get back here, Izaya!”
Shizuo doesn't try to catch up to him.
 
No more than a week later, Izaya tries again. The property damage had been paid
for by his parents, of course. It was a ridiculously high price for a stupid
chair but he knows they paid a little extra to smooth things over with the
school.
It seems humiliating Shizuo isn't the key. But maybe something else is. Maybe a
dig at his ridiculously high academic morals.
It's the middle of the day this time. Shizuo is in the photocopy room printing
out a pages for an upcoming test he’s putting together. He’s sitting at the
lounge table in the room, engrossed in the newspaper out in front of him while
the copies stack up. Izaya peeks at the coffee mug in his hand. In the middle
of the day? Poor Shizu-chan must not have gotten enough sleep last night. The
current state of his hair also seems to support that theory. He finds himself
staring for a little while, at the pensive look in Shizuo’s eyes as he reads
and the strands of hair that fall in the way. He doesn’t see moments like these
very often. He's so used to the crude, violently angry version of Shizuo.
Besides, a man like Shizuo should stay true to himself, he doesn’t deserve
leisure time like this.
He focuses on his goal and carefully sneaks into the room, leans over, and
takes a single copy of the test to make an answer key. He typically sells it to
other students and he’s done it plenty of times before, just not in any of
Shizuo’s classes. It’s not even funny the price these people will pay to not
study, except it definitely is. Right as he makes it through the door he hears
a sharp “Hey!” which is Izaya’s cue to break into a sprint down the hall.
“IZAYA!” Shizuo bellows after him. Izaya doesn’t have to turn to know he's
being chased because he hears Shizuo’s rapid footsteps not far behind him.
Izaya only runs faster, trying not to laugh too hard as it would hinder his
pace. Students in the hall quickly step out of the way when they see who's
chasing him. “What are you- Give that back to me!”
“No way, Shizu-chan! I’m going to make good money off your honorable students,”
He shouts back. At least during times like these, he can feel like things are
normal. The rush, the adrenaline of having all of Shizuo’s monumentally
dangerous attention on him is almost as good as the rush that comes when he's
punished. He won't get caught. Shizuo is fast but his strength is what he’s
better suited for. Izaya may be shorter than him because Shizuo is a freak of
nature but Izaya is actually taller than average and he knows how to carry his
legs.
He might have actually escaped if he hadn’t run into the dumb block of wood
that was Seiji Yagiri. The force of the impact makes them both fall to the
floor with grunts of pain. Papers fly everywhere and Izaya fumbles through them
to find his test packet. Just as soon as he finds it and starts to run off
again, a hand grabs onto the back of his jacket and stops him in his tracks. He
tries to get out of it to make another escape but Shizuo grips his arm like a
vice, making that impossible. Oh well. The point of all this was being had in
the first place.
“You caught me Shizuo,” eyes full of mirth, he grins at him mischievously.
Shizuo’s expression, in contrast, is a grimace of pure rage and bloodlust.
Based on that expression, you wouldn’t think he was looking at a dear fellow
student and pupil but at the scum of the earth. Izaya grins the whole way to
the office. This had to be it. When Shizuo looks at him like he’s actually
capable of murder, it has to mean something.
 
After all that, Izaya seethes in his chair during detention with one of the
most forgettable, predictable teachers in the whole school. He sits there
scribbling lines in the same spot on his paper with a pen over and over until
it rips through the page. Of course they interrogated him and asked if he’s
ever stolen tests before, and of course, Izaya lied. He never left any evidence
from the previous times so they couldn’t pin anything else on him. When he’s
done tearing through his paper, he leaves, barely acknowledging the teacher
telling him to get back in his seat.
Ultimately, none of it did the trick. No one can just change like that, Izaya
knows it for a fact. He knows it from his limited experiences and from all the
humans he observes. Shizuo can’t be that serious about being ethical. He just
can’t, it wouldn’t make any sense if he was. Izaya is racking up a lot of
detentions, the boring kind, and will probably be living in detention for the
next 3 months -if he actually decides to go that is. But he thinks he’s close.
He’s not going to give up.
Shizuo steps out onto the small patio behind the school where the loading docks
for the food trucks are. It's where he and some of the lunch staff go for their
smoke break. Izaya has been waiting out here for a while now, waiting for him
to show up. Izaya watches him closely, taking in another one of Shizuo’s
uncommon quiet moments. He’s leaning against the wall, minding his own
business, sucking that smoke in like he needs it to breathe. His eyes are calm
and thoughtful again, looking out into the soccer and track field when he
notices something in his peripheral vision. He looks up and spots Izaya, who
happens to be sitting upon a ledge that runs along the wall of the school.
Shizuo sputters and chokes on the cigarette smoke. “Wh-what the f-” he coughs
again, “What are you- get down, get down now-”
“I'm on a smoke break, just like you, Shizu-chan” Izaya smiles cheerfully as he
inhales from the joint he's holding.
“Izaya....is that- is that marijuana?” The calmness in his eyes is long gone
now. To be fairly honest, he didn't understand the appeal of the drug but just
as before, it was a means to an end.
“Oops, you caught me.” He throws the cherry at Shizuo’s feet and climbs further
up the wall of the school, using other structures and ledges as leverage to
pull himself up.
“Izaya? Izaya. Izaya, get down NOW! Stop!”
“You better catch me quick! That stuff was so strong, I'm starting to believe I
can fly!” He breaks out into a sudden cackle and continues to scale the
building, ignoring Shizuo’s screaming voice telling him to come down. By the
time he makes it to the top he’s holding his sides laughing himself to tears.
He takes a few deep breaths and he peeks over the ledge but he doesn't see his
professor down there. He'll catch up eventually.
Just as he's about to walk through the roof access door that he’d had propped
open with a brick, Shizuo blasts through it and lifts him by the shirt.
“Izaya you are going to regret everything you just did.” He growls furiously
through wild heaving breaths that make his chest rise and fall dramatically. He
had run up several flights of stairs to get there after all. Izaya gets
distracted by the tendons in Shizuo's throat contracting but it's hard to look
away from the intensity of Shizuo's eyes for too long. Izaya’s eyes widen and
his words and he smiles like he doesn't believe him, “Am I, now?”
“Aren’t you getting tired of this?” Shizuo shouts. “You’re acting insane. You
could have gotten yourself killed! What’s it gonna take for you to stop??”
“You’re the one forcing me to do this, Shizu-chan. If you want it to stop then
you know what you have to do,” he replies evenly, his dark eyes boring into
Shizuo's. The words have an effect on him. His frown deepens but his eyes
betray a hint of doubt and the grip on his shirt falters. He recovers though.
“I'm not making you do anything. I already warned you before, you can't play
around with your life like this.”
“Awh, you care do you? If you really care then you'll fix what you've ruined.”
They stare each other down for what seems like an eternity to him until Shizuo
lets go of his shirt and leaves him staggering for balance. “I’m sending
someone up here to collect you. Stay put,” Shizuo grumbles, turning his back on
him and walks down the stairs but not before moving the brick out of the way.
The door falls shut, locking Izaya out. He pounds his fist against it with all
the force he’s got until it hurts too much.
 
They asked him where he got the weed from which Izaya did not say and the
obligatory phone call to his parents was made. That wouldn't amount to
anything, Izaya knew. Until further action was decided, he was forced into
detention again that evening but there was nothing they could do to stop him
from just leaving.
Today just isn’t a good day for him. He was sure Shizuo would crack this time.
He thought Shizuo was actually going to have a heart attack when he saw him
climbing that wall. And the look he gave him when Izaya blamed everything on
him, was priceless like he almost believed it. But every time Izaya raises the
stakes, Shizuo just doubles down and denies him again and again.
Izaya can admit he’s losing his patience keeping this up. But at least he’s not
the only one. Izaya had already left the building and cut through the faculty
parking lot on his way home when he sees Shizuo from a distance. He’s pacing
quick and jilted in long strides and he’s talking on the phone to someone in a
hushed, frustrated voice. He appears to calm down a little after hearing the
other person speak which makes Izaya uneasy. Who is he talking to?
Shizuo hangs up and stands there seemingly lost in thought - and he must really
think he's alone in the parking lot because he then grabs onto a nearby garbage
can and kicks it repeatedly before backing away, hastily lighting a cigarette,
and getting into his car. Once he’s gone, Izaya walks up to the garbage can to
inspect it. The thing is actually dented. It makes his day just a little
brighter than before.
Chapter End Notes
     Fyi I still die laughing when I think about his chair breaking and
     Shizuo taco-ing into the ground xD ohhh my god. Lemme know what you
     thought! I may take a while to reply though, it's been a busy week!
     Ps. Someone asked how old izaya is in the story. Izaya is a second
     year so he’s 17. That was gonna be established later on.
***** Chapter 4 *****
Chapter Summary
     Izaya has reached the end of his rope.
Chapter Notes
     I'm really sorry this is much later than I anticipated! I had a bad
     case of self induced writers block (that's a thing right?) Also I had
     to make sure this chapter didn't seem too rushed or repetitive
     either.
     Possible trigger warnings in the end notes.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Izaya continues this string of outbursts but he isn’t totally blind to his
actions, he knows he's becoming more and more irrational. His parents might not
be bothered enough to care about the phone calls from the school or the
detentions that keep piling up, but if he gets suspended more than once, they
might consider moving him to another school again. And he will not have that.
But he still remembers what happened in that parking lot, what Shizuo did when
he thought no one was looking. It gave Izaya hope which isn't exactly an
emotion he feels very often. So he still acts out in Shizuo’s classes, whether
for the thrill of it or for the sake of his goal but he doesn’t risk pulling
the crazy elaborate plans he used to.
Sometimes the days just blur together. Day by day he has to endure seeing
Shizuo and knowing he’s out of reach, knowing he can’t bend him to his will.
The only thing he can control is his anger and even that is a hit or miss. He
starts to really hate him. He curses him for being so unpredictable, for being
so different from other humans. His mere existence makes Izaya’s life harder.
And that’s why he appreciates tormenting him all that much more.
Izaya misses so much class because of his behavior that Shizuo actually begins
to let some of it slide. Just so Izaya won’t miss class. What a hero. At times
he likes to take advantage of that and push Shizuo until he has no choice but
to remove him anyway. It's a small joy.
However, his victories are small and short lived. Nothing has worked out the
way he wanted it to. Shizuo won't budge and Izaya is left with this familiar
aching need. He can hardly get off properly on his own anymore. Masturbating to
the memory of what happened used to be enough but now, he's left groaning in
frustration one disappointing orgasm after another when he's in bed at night.
Nothing compares to the elation he felt when Shizuo spanked him almost raw. He
needs more, he needs relief. He doesn’t know what to do.
Izaya always knew Shizuo was a beast but he didn't take him for cruel. Which is
what this was. The memory of Shizuo’s slightly calloused hand smacking his skin
so unrestrained and relentless, the heat he felt, slowly fading from his mind
while having nothing else to stave off the longing is torture for a seventeen
year old. The irony of it isn’t lost on him. Shizuo is the last person he'd
want to be this dependent on. Why did he have to make him crave so much and
then not deliver? He truly is a monster.
He’s constantly on edge at school, when he goes. When he doesn't go, he stays
in the city or on the rooftop of the school. For once in his life he has barely
any interest in the lives of other people, that alone is the biggest travesty
of this entire ordeal.
This week is no different. Except Izaya’s determination is slowly dwindling in
the face of Shizuo’s impassivity. Things aren’t going to go back to the way
they were. Regardless of what he feels, he doesn’t let any of it show. Not when
Shizuo glares at him suspiciously, or when Shinra asks how he’s doing.
Izaya is walking back to class after lunch period ends. He’s one of the last to
leave, so there’s barely anyone else in the halls when he’s walking. He notices
two students in the hall to his right, both of whom he recognizes. One of them
is Haruo Tsukiyama, a overly proud and completely uninspired hotheaded third
year. He has Hiro Araki, the other student, cornered near the lockers by the
bathroom.
The scene before him is clear cut and familiar. He doesn’t usually interfere
with these kinds of situations as they’re unfolding. He never does actually, he
just likes to observe. But this time he finds himself walking down the hall
towards them.
Tsukiyama is the type of person that thinks way too highly of himself when he
really shouldn't. He’s easily offended by the most ridiculous things that the
tiniest perceived insult to his character would start a never-ending grudge.
His short temper vaguely reminds him of Shizuo. Except this guy’s anger most
likely comes from a fragile ego and not a deep abysmal pit of monstrous rage.
He always thought the former was an interesting trait in humans, from an
objective standpoint. Today, Izaya is not being objective.
“Did I hear that right, did you seriously just talk back to me? Do you really
want to die? Eh?” he overhears him growling at the cowering boy.
“No! I didn’t mean it like-”
“And here I was about to be nice and leave you alone. I am a nice guy after
all, but you had to go and disrespect me. I’m older than you, you know. Do you
think you can speak to me however you want? Did I ask for your opinion?”
“Wow. I didn’t know you had so much to be proud of Senpai. What was so special
about you again?”
“What the fuck you just say to me?” Tsukiyama slowly turns away from his prey
to face Izaya, his eyes wide in disbelief but more importantly filled with the
promise of violence. Araki looks at Izaya gratefully and slowly backs away from
them.
“I actually happen to think there isn’t anything very remarkable about you at
all. Aside from that record you hold for stupidity.” Izaya laughs haughtily as
he approaches him. “Well, I guess in other words, I find you pretty boring,”
Izaya explains, “and stupid.”
“Do you know who you're speaking to? I've done plenty, you just don't know what
you're talking about!"
Mhmm. I wouldn't know anything about how you can hardly stay afloat in school
if it weren't for your parents. How many times have you repeated this grade?"
You fucking bastard, how dare you! You want to get your lights punched out, is
that it? Huh brat?”
“So many questions,” Izaya says with disappointment. “Are you going to stand
there while I insult you or are you going to do something about it? No
nevermind, I seriously doubt you could anyway.” He turns his back and starts to
walk away.
“Ok since you have a death wish, how about I just kill you, Orihara!” He shouts
and takes a swing at him. Izaya dodges it with ease, keeping his distance.
“You're gonna have to try harder than that senpai,” he giggles. “Are you even
trying?” he asks after stepping around another punch. Is Izaya seriously
getting himself in a fight? For once in his life he's unsure of what his next
move is. Dancing in circles around him is easy, and safe but soon stops being
enough. The more energy he puts into this the more his composure breaks.
Provoking Tsukiyama just isn't the same as provoking Shizuo and that makes
something deep inside him start to itch.
His rational side is screaming not to get so close, cursing himself for being
so cocky knowing full well that he isn’t a fighter without a knife and even
then, he’s much better at avoidance and escape. But his body is moving against
all better judgement. The anger simmering beneath his skin, the anger he could
make himself forget was there is bubbling out and he can’t stop it. He's a
little shocked when he lashes out and connects his fist with Tsukiyama's jaw.
It's a sudden overwhelming feeling of relief, even if it means he's stooped
that low.
Tsukiyama holds his face glaring at him before charging again. Izaya continues
to dodge but it's harder up close and he refuses to move back. The next second
he's disoriented. Tsukiyama’s finally hits him, square on the mouth. He reels
back and moves to touch where he got hit but he stops himself. The force of the
punch brings splitting pain about the inside of his mouth. The inside of his
lip tore on his teeth. That pain happens to be even more of a relief, and the
fact that it is, probably means he’s hit rock bottom.
“Haha that finally got you to shut you up didn't it, Orihara?”
It should be Izaya’s cue to step back a few more paces and reassess the
situation but instead, but he takes advantage of Tsukiyama's lowered guard and
undercuts him in the stomach, hearing a satisfying grunt coming out of him.
The tackle Izaya doesn’t see coming. They both land on the ground at a hard
angle and clumsily wrestle for control. Everything is too unpredictable, too
fast. Izaya has gotten sloppy. Tsukiyama is bigger and easily pins Izaya
underneath him.
"Who the hell do you think your are?” He lands another solid punch against
Izaya’s face, and then another until Izaya gets his hands free and blocks
himself. He'll give Tsukiyama this, he is fierce in a fight.
Things like this will always end up happening when Izaya lets his emotions
dictate his interactions with people; when he’s not detached from the lot of
them. He ends up in messy situations he’d rather watch from the sidelines than
be at the center of.
He laughs deprecatingly, wondering what’s become of him as he blocks his face
from the Tsukiyama's relentless fists. When Izaya finds his chance thrusts his
palm hard against Tsukiyama’s nose and puts his head into a hold to avoid
getting hit again. This way he's able to keep him still and roll on top,
kneeing him in the ribs as he does. They both struggle on the floor, the fight
turning into a pathetic skirmish full of kicks, tugs, and skimming punches. He
still lands a few more much to his delight before feeling the back of his
collar being yanked back with incredible force.
“Break it up!” Someone shouts. The two of them are forced apart by teachers, he
assumes, but they both strain towards each other trying to continue where they
left off. Izaya can taste his own blood filling his mouth, he probingly licks
at the wound on the inside of his lip, testing how sharp the sting is. It’s
bleeding too fast and he’s forced to spit it out on the ground, refusing to
swallow it.
It seems the classes in this hall have been dismissed for the next lunch period
which explains the influx of students crowding around them now and professors
trying to intervene. Izaya hears a low, threatening growl in his ear.
“Izaya,” the name is drawn out through clenched teeth.
Ah Shizu-chan, of course. Always only showing up when he’s least wanted.
Tsukiyama jams a finger at him through a wall of adults pushing him back and
screams, “This isn't over Orihara, just wait. Just fucking wait!”
Izaya looks right at him and grins widely, flashing his bloodstained teeth.
He’d been deceptively docile while he was dragged away but he takes advantage
of the slack on his jacket and lunges forward towards him again, bent on
throwing one last punch, just one more. His enthusiasm is bank now that his
teacher is here. He almost slips out of Shizuo’s hands but he wraps an arm
around Izaya’s middle just in time and hoists him up.
“Oi! What did I say, break it up!” Shizuo shouts again as he pulls him farther
away from the jumble of students and teachers and down the hall. There’s no one
inside him telling him to stop now, he should feel ashamed but he really just
doesn't care.
“Get off me! Get off!” Izaya kicks and shouts, pushing at Shizuo’s arm. Shizuo
ignores him and pulls him aside in another hall where he spins him around and
presses him into the lockers.
“What did I tell you Izaya? What the fuck did I tell you?” Shizuo growls out,
smacking him upside the head. The scowl on his face fades and leans closer to
his face, looking a little taken aback. He's staring at the darkening bruises
and cuts, his mouth. “Look at what you've done to yourself,” his voice
strangely enough, sounds distraught.
“I didn’t do anything, it was that maniac. I was-”
“No!” Shizuo slams a hand into the locker by Izaya’s head before gripping his
shoulders hard. “For once don’t give me any bullshit, kid. You realize this is
the stupidest thing you’ve done? Do you want to get thrown out of school? Is
that really what you want?”
Shizuo is truly livid. And right in his face. Izaya stares at him wide eyed,
heart beating wildly, still catching his breath from the physical exhaustion
and the pain.
“No,” Izaya says honestly.
Shizuo doesn't look away for one second as he stares intently into his eyes.
His anger quickly dissolves into concern. He lets go of Izaya’s shoulders
carefully and Izaya’s heart sinks at the loss. “Then why? Why would you do
this. Why do you need this so badly?”
It’s the first time he’s ever heard Shizuo’s voice so… worried? Sad? He’s seen
this softness in Shizuo’s eyes before but it was never directed towards him
until now. He’s speechless.
I don't know, he almost says. ‘I was angry’ or ‘I needed to relieve stress’
were all possible answers. Because I needed you floats into his head and he
cringes with disgust. It sounds so pathetic, Izaya would never dream of saying
something like that out loud.
He carefully molds his expression into something he can live with and smiles
harmlessly. “You know how it is with us, teenagers. Raging teenage hormones and
all that. Testosterone. It's nothing.”
Shizuo sighs heavily and turns away, rubs at his eyes like a man who’s hanging
onto his last thread of vitality. He runs a hand a through his hair. “This is
all my fault. This is all my- damn it-!”
Izaya stares at Shizuo, confused by his strange reaction. Not at all like the
irritated one he was hoping for. Maybe his days here are finally numbered. His
thoughts are interrupted by rapid footsteps making their way towards them.
“Orihara-san!” a shrill voice of another professor calls out. “What are you
doing just standing there, so help me…Oh good Heiwajima-san, you’re here.”
Shizuo straightens himself up and becomes professional again. “Yes, I’m taking
him to the principal now.”
                                  ----------
Izaya sits in a chair outside the office with gauze pads stuck in his mouth and
an ice pack pressed against his face. Shizuo and another teacher who broke up
the fight are discussing the incident with the principal. His parents were
called but they aren’t even in town this time around so they left the decision
of disciplinary action entirely to the school staff until they returned.
Tsukiyama glowers at him from where he sits across the hall. He's also waiting
and holding an ice pack against his nose.
“Did I knock any teeth out, Orihara?”
Izaya just smirks at him as best he can without grimacing in pain, but he
doesn’t see any point engaging him further. His fellow classmate did his part
even if he didn’t know it.
“Hey! Don't fucking ignore me, brat. You think you're better than me don't you.
Well you weren't thinking that when you were getting beat up like a little
bitch,” he leers.
They both hear yelling from inside the office. It’s unmistakably Shizuo’s.
Izaya suspects he’s dragging him through the mud in there. Izaya closes his
eyes and thinks of how close their faces were earlier, the raw emotion in his
hazel eyes. It was only a fleeting moment but still left a strong impression in
the midst of Shizuo’s careful negligence towards him. Then he remembers the
fear he saw there too. He frowns. He finally acknowledges the other student.
“I hope your nose doesn't end up more crooked than before, Tsukiyama senpai.”
Tsukiyama springs out of his chair, “You fucking-!”
Shizuo abruptly walks out the door, disturbing Izaya’s thoughts and making
Tsukiyama sit right back down. Without a word, Shizuo walks past them both and
leaves. The assistant principal steps out then, telling Izaya to come in.
Principal Akirawa sits in his office and gestures for Izaya to take a seat.
He's old and has a leathery skin that betrays a lifetime of scowling and
worrying but his hair is a suspiciously inky black. Izaya is slightly amused by
the careful deliberation on his principal’s face like he hasn't already decided
what he's going to do to him. He slowly takes off his glasses and folds them on
the table, likely for dramatic effect, and reads him carefully. He's sizes up
every bruise and his slightly swollen lip with something like disappointment.
“Do you have anything to say for yourself, boy?”
“Nothing except my deepest regrets for my actions sir. I want to apologize to
you and the school for my disrespect, sir.” He lowers his head.
The principal’s frown lines deepen. “You say the same thing every time I see
you in this office. Which lately, is very often. I can't help but think those
are nothing but empty words.”
“They're not principal Akirawa. What I did was really wrong and reckless. You
can aptly see I've atoned for it.” He gestures to his face. “What happened
today put a lot of things in perspective for me.”
Inside he wants to scoff. He would keep doing this if he could. Izaya knows
he's not spoiled because he's smart enough to be grateful for how stinking rich
his parents are. It’s only because of them and their donations to the school
that Izaya is given so much leeway. But perhaps he's reached the limits of that
privilege.
“Orihara-san, you are a talented, gifted student. We both know that, don't we?
And yet, your behavior this semester has plummeted drastically without needing
to. I was considering suspending you for a period of time if this behavior
continued but that was before today’s incident. Our school is very lenient when
it comes to promising students like yourself but you continue to take advantage
of the opportunities given to you. You consistently prove what a lost cause you
are, Orihara-san. Because of your disgraceful actions, we were fully prepared
to expel you…”
Izaya isn’t looking at him anymore, he just stares at the man’s nameplate, far
past listening at this point. He doesn’t need to hear the rest to know what’s
going to happen. He’s paying the price for letting his emotions get the best of
him.
“Had it not been for Heiwajima-san, that is.”
Eh?
“You should be thankful to have your Sensei vouch for you. He explained the
circumstances of your confrontation with Tsukiyama-san.” When Izaya says
nothing he continues. “The only student that witnessed the incident ran into
Heiwajima-san and told him what happened, that you were defending him from
being bullied. We do not condone violence but we also abhor bullying.
Heiwajima-san has also explained that you have been having personal issues
outside of school that have significantly impacted your academics and he
insisted you be given one last chance.
I hope you will consider this as your last opportunity to clean up your act and
become one of our model students again, Orihara-san. In light of what has
transpired today, Heiwajima-san has agreed to facilitate your detention every
day for the rest of the semester so you can reflect on your actions.”
What, what, what?
Before Izaya can blink through his shock, the principal concludes his speech,
“You will be suspended from school for ten days and after that, your detention
becomes effective immediately. These sessions are mandatory and failure to show
up for each and every one of them will be your last strike, Orihara-san. If you
do not comply we will have no choice but to expel you.”
Izaya slowly gathers his bearings. “I... understand Principal Akirawa. I
appreciate your compassion more than you know. Thank you.” Izaya bows his head
respectfully. He bites back the laugh that's bubbling in the back of his
throat.
                                  ----------
“You don't need stitches, thankfully the cuts aren't that deep and the bleeding
stopped. Just don't mess with it ok? No licking or touching.” Shinra says,
inspecting the inside of Izaya’s upper lip where the skin got cut. He presses
against Izaya’s teeth with gloved fingers to check if any of them are loose.
“Everything else looks to be fine!”
They're at Shinra's place this time after school. Shinra has all his father's
medical supplies out on the coffee table in his living room.
“Whatever you say, doc.” Izaya smirks weakly.
“So? What happened to you, Izaya? I thought you don't get involved with those
kinds of things for this exact reason.” He points rudely at his face. He
doesn’t sound the least bit concerned, just curious.
“Are you saying I'm a bad fighter Shinra? Whose side are you on? Besides, I've
already gotten what I wanted.”
“Well he did get you pretty good. And wait, you mean the detention? I also
don't understand why you're so happy about that. You've been acting very
strange lately.”
“Of course I’m not happy, Shinra,” Izaya scoffs, his smug expression betrays
the validity of his words. “I have to spend a whole two months alone with that
monster, it's terrible.”
“It doesn’t really seem like you hate the idea. Why get into this much trouble
if you hate Sensei?” Shinra asks. He sticks a bandage on the nasty cut and
bruises on his cheek and finishes by peeling off his latex gloves and throwing
them away.
Izaya giggles at that. Giggles until he's cackling and it escalates until his
whole body is shaking with laughter. His laughs break off with a sharp hiss of
pain from stretching his lips too much. He catches his breath and collects
himself before sighing. “Oh Shinra, I’m not really in any trouble but I can see
why it would look that way to you. Haven't you noticed I do whatever I want
around here and they just let me? It's all part of a long game I’m playing with
Shizu-chan. That monster is exactly where I want him.”
Truthfully, Izaya never could have foreseen things ending up this way, but he
didn’t say that. His strange outburst of foolishness actually led to his
victory. Getting into a fight with someone else, something that didn’t involve
Shizuo in any way, was what made him cave? Well, the more Izaya thinks about
it, the more it makes sense. He could have saved himself all this trouble if
he'd figured it out sooner.
But something about this is rubbing him the wrong way. Izaya can’t understand
why Shizuo stood up for him while he was in trouble. From the way principal
Akirawa said it, Shizuo singlehandedly prevented him from getting expelled. The
man is brutal and unforgiving, and he isn’t lenient in the least with any of
his students. And there's no way he actually believes Izaya was trying to help
that student. Akirawa might be eating that up but Shizuo isn't that stupid.
Izaya wonders if Shizuo has any plans of his own but he decides it won’t be an
issue. He’s going to get what he wanted anyway.
“Are you sure that’s not going to backfire?”
Izaya reclines farther against the back of the couch, lacing his fingers behind
his head, perfectly at ease. “Absolutely sure.”
Chapter End Notes
     Tw: brief descriptions of blood and mild injuries
     Updates may be less consistent but they won't take forever :p gimme
     your thoughts!
***** Chapter 5 *****
Chapter Notes
     Ok phew! I posted this chapter in a rush. Sorry for the wait, I was
     just stuck and worked on this chapter so slowly I was really starting
     to hate it lol
     Fun fact, the entire idea for this fic (the oneshot this is based on)
     was inspired by two things. A very good scene from the movie
     Secretary (if you haven't seen it, please watch it, it's so good) and
     by an actual school in North Carolina that actually offers punishment
     via paddle instead of sitting through detention. Uh yeah, weird isn't
     it lol
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Izaya spends his two weeks of suspension very occupied. He was a little
restless at first but if he's going to spend so much time away from his prize,
he's gonna need to stay busy.
Without school, he can wake up early every morning and spend the whole day in
the city observing people like he's always wanted to. After some time Izaya
feels like he's been renewed. These past few weeks have been terrible for him.
But now that he's secured what he wants, it feels like everything is going back
to normal, as it should be.
Aside from his suspension being overkill and being apart from Shizuo, the only
other setback of it all is his bruised face, externally speaking. He’d prefer
not to interact with anyone in person when he looks so weak and pathetic. It's
not really that his beating was that bad. It's just that Izaya’s creamy skin
bruises far too easily. The bruises he usually gets are from climbing fences
and walls when the occasional misstep and subsequent fall happen. And of course
from Shizuo. But his face has never received this kind of treatment and it
looks terrible. He has to keep gauze pads taped over the outer corner of his
brow and ice his lip every night to keep the swelling down.
The bruises are an unfortunate but necessary reminder of his embarrassing
rashness. He hates that he's willing to lower himself so much for a goddamn
monster. He's partially sickened with himself for the pitiful person he made
himself when he picked that fight. He failed and somehow got what he wanted
anyway. Pure dumb luck. It feels nice to win no matter what but Orihara Izaya
shouldn’t be getting his way on accident; he cannot make a habit out of this.
That's why he's taking this as a valuable lesson, he let his emotions get in
the way before and he won't do it again.
But on a baser level, he can't say he hates the bruises themselves. There's a
constant throbbing pain that stays with him. It helps him take his mind off of
his craving for Shizuo. That being said, it's not an experience he wants to
repeat ever again. The kind of pain from getting punched in the face isn't
exactly Izaya's thing and definitely doesn't compare the kind of pain Shizuo
has given him but it'll have to do as a meager replacement for now until two
weeks pass and he can finally have the thing he's been starving for, for weeks
on end.
His appearance probably peaked at its worst two days into his suspension.
That's when his twin sisters finally noticed it. He walks out of the bathroom
after a quick shower early that morning and runs into them. They’re already
dressed and packed for school. The bus should be arriving at any moment. Their
eyes widen with awe and curiosity when they see the sorry state he’s in.
“Neh, Iza-nii. Who beat you up? Were you caught by surprise this time?” Mairu
giggles.
“He was jumped,” Kururi posits.
“I wasn’t.” his tone is clipped. He tries to walk past them to his room.
“Mugged,” Kururi tries again. They both backtrack so they’re still in his way.
“No.”
“So a normal fight? Bo-ring. Maybe go with the mugging story, it sounds better.
Ouch, it must have reaally hurt!” Mairu says, bouncing on the balls of her feet
and looking at Izaya’s face from all possible angles. “Can I touch one?”
Izaya swats away her probing finger and snaps, “It looks worse than it is,
okay? And I did just as much damage.”
Mairu chimes in again. “But iza-nii, what are we supposed to do if you get beat
up this easily in a fair fight? How can we expect you to protect us??”
Izaya scoffs and keeps walking, “I’m not wasting my time with this. As if I'd
risk myself for the likes of you two anyway.”
“There are a lot of psychos out there that like to prey on cute girls like us.
Like we hear on tv right, Kuru-nee?” she turns to her quiet sister. “What if
something happens to us! Don’t be so useless Iza-nii.”
“Please?” Kururi uses the small pleading voice she’s perfected at this point,
not that Izaya is at all fooled. And they’ve now gone and blocked entry to his
bedroom. He rolls his eyes. He'll be damned if he actually has to spend time
with them so he thinks of something quick.
“Fine. You want something to protect you?” He pushes through them to his room
and digs through one of his drawers. He hands them a can of mace. “Take it and
leave me alone.”
It was a very good move because they immediately become enthralled with it,
looking at the label on the can and turning it over in their hands. “So cool,
Iza-nii! You aren’t so useless after all,” Mairu gushes. “Let’s go, Kuru-nee.”
Izaya slams his door shut agitatedly. Those dear little accidents never fail to
irritate the hell out of him. He sighs, and closes his eyes, waits for the
sound of the front door opening and closing echoing through the empty house
before opening his eyes. Finally, some quiet again. Things have been quiet for
the most part. His parents haven’t returned yet and won’t for another three
weeks. They had called and told him that. "You are not ruining this trip," they
said. The longer they take the better if you ask him.
News of his suspension did little to alarm them like he knew it would, let
alone make them return ahead of schedule. They’re away on a month-long business
trip to some conference with several other large company representatives, some
from overseas. Needless to say, this one is important. Trips this long don’t
happen often but they aren’t rare either. His sisters are at their clingiest
when their parents are away for these trips.
Izaya supposes he inadvertently forced their return. Mom and dad would be
stupid to ignore the school now that he’s almost been expelled; not to mention
it would raise some red flags. They committed to a meeting with the principal
when they return to officially discuss what should be done with him.
It wasn't always like this. He was a model student and son up until he was 12.
It was easy for him then, but that never meant much to his mother and father.
He had long since given up on trying to impress them and he never expected
anything to change when his grades started plummeting or when he constantly got
in trouble at school. At least they’re consistent, he always thinks and he
considers himself lucky. Most kids complain about their parents always meddling
in their lives and but Izaya doesn't have that problem, never has. There was a
time when they were around more; when they felt like actual people. But he was
so young and the memories are like grainy, incomplete fragments of a distant
dream you can't quite remember after waking up.
If his parents actually ended up worrying now at this point in his life, he
might just drop dead from the absurdity and hilarity of it.
The reminder that they'll be returning leaves a bad taste in his mouth but he's
resolved to enjoy this free time. Aside from having to feed his sisters every
now and then, he’s completely free to do whatever he wants during his
suspension. Well, not everything, he thinks sourly. He knows this is the
alternative to expulsion but two damn weeks?? Two weeks without putting a scowl
on Shizuo's face or making the vein in his forehead bulge. Were it not for him,
Izaya would relish digging his roots deeper with every passing day a little
more. That being said, with school out of the way, he has double the amount of
free time to cultivate his connections. He gets better at it every day and he's
so good at it, that he questions why he still goes to school at all when he’d
be much better off dropping out and making a name for himself.
But he knows why. The only one still insisting on giving Izaya rules and
restrictions is his deplorable excuse for a teacher. It's so cute that he
thinks he can even try. The unusual and aberrant man that happens to be working
at a high school of all places in the world; Izaya's high school no less. He's
the only thing associated with the school that he actually looks forward to
when the suspension is over.
He can’t say he misses Shizuo but he does miss being in class with him,
watching, taunting, and waiting. He almost forgot what that anticipation felt
like. And there’s a considerable amount of it currently. Shizuo will be waiting
for him two weeks from now, paddle and all. or maybe he’ll use his hands again.
he’s certainly won't be picky.
Izaya now has something he didn't have when he had to endure Shizuo's rebuffs
at school, another source of pain. Some days when he knows he's alone at home,
he lays face down, knees bent, on his bed with a hand between his legs
squeezing and tugging his throbbing cock. He purposefully puts his body's
weight on his face. He keens loudly from the painful pressure on his bruises as
his strokes get faster.
It's not the same, and his ass feels sorely neglected, but it's better than
nothing and it helps when he pictures Shizuo's arm, sleeves rolled up, swinging
down on him from behind. Izaya is bent down and immobile, he doesn't know what
he'd want Shizuo to say during this, he was never chatty when he paddled him
except for the most recent time when he scolded him. There's just something
about the way he said those things, made it feel so much better.
His idea worked on a practical level. His pain gets him off so much better than
when he's just beating off normally but he still comes out from the afterglow
highly dissatisfied and frustrated like he was robbed of something.
When it's not enough, he makes up for their time apart by waiting for Shinra
outside the gates of the school when it lets out. Conveniently enough, Shinra
is usually one of the last to leave so Izaya has an excuse to stand there among
the others on the school grounds and wait for Shizuo to come out.
Every day Shizuo walks out of the main doors looking like he’s got a bad taste
in his mouth. It’s way too hot now for anyone to be wearing a jacket so he’ll
usually walk out in just his button-down shirt and the heavy looking messenger
bag over his shoulder.
Aside from his perpetual look of ennui, he seems generally calm until he looks
around as if sensing something’s wrong and locks eyes with Izaya.
Izaya always grins at him over the heads of other students like they’re sharing
a secret. Shizuo clenches his jaw, his slightly furrowed brow turns into a
stormy scowl, clearly visible despite the distance. He whips his head forward
every time and breaks the contact, hastily making his exit.
Unbothered by this, Izaya continues to watch him shamelessly, looking for all
the tells of his rage. Like how increasingly tense Shizuo's shoulders get or
how impatient his strides become before disappearing past the other cars. Some
days, Izaya really wants to wait by his car when school is over just to talk to
him, just to provoke him a little. He wonders what it would be like to "run
into" Shizuo in the city. But it would be wise to show restraint for now.
Yes, the result of his fight with Tsukiyama becomes completely obvious to
everyone who walks past him while leaving school. But he cares less about his
classmates knowing and more about the players in the city. He just wants Shizuo
to see what his ‘noble’ actions have caused. The price he paid to get Shizuo
back. It’s at its worst in the first week. That's when Shizuo is his most
avoidant after spotting him. By Friday, he no longer needs the gauze pads for
the cuts and the bruises become far less dramatic. His lip heals quicker than
everything else, thankfully.
One week is finally over. Izaya's halfway there now but it seems time has
decided to move slower now that he's so close. The following Monday Shizuo
walks out with his sleeves rolled up and his hands shoved into his pockets,
perhaps to prevent himself from fidgeting for his cigarettes. He always keeps
them in his left pocket. Izaya watches him unabashedly, committing his
appearance to memory as he makes his way across the square to the lot. From how
fixed his gaze on the ground is, Izaya guesses Shizuo is purposefully ignoring
him. How annoying.
Shinra’s voice finally filters into his head. “Come on, already.”
“What?”
“You’re not staring at Heiwajima sensei again are you?” Shinra asks, not
bothering to conceal his exasperation. He rests his chin on Izaya’s shoulder
from behind looking in his line of sight. “Oh, you are.”
Izaya fixes him with a glare and shakes him off. “That’s… ridiculous. I’m-” he
cuts himself off and thinks carefully about what to say. “I’m not,” he grits
out before shoving past Shinra through the gates.
“Hey wait up! Now you’re in a hurry? This is why you’ve been waiting for me
after school all last whole week isn’t it?”
“If you must know, yes. And also, that monster is an open book, I was just
watching for weaknesses, nothing more Shinra. Don't get the wrong idea,” Izaya
explains calmly now.
“Right. Of course,” Shinra flashes his boyish smile and Izaya can't help but
think he could have handled this moment so much better as his cheeks warm a
little. They’re walking side by side now on the side of the road. “You seem to
be healing pretty fast, that's good recovery time.”
“Yes, the sooner the better,” Izaya replies shortly. He runs a finger lightly
across his tender cheekbone. “So, did I miss anything interesting at school
this week?” Izaya changes the subject.
“Well, we were talking about the parasympathetic nervous system today in class
and next week we’re going to dissect-”
“Ok, I guess I walked right into that one. Forget I asked.”
“You know, for all this talk about loving humans, shouldn’t you be more
interested in their bodies?”
“Shinra, is that supposed to sound dirty? Who knew you had such a high regard
for peoples' bodies,” Izaya says in a mocking hushed voice.
Shinra shakes his head like it was a good-hearted joke and says, "You're an
asshole, Izaya.” His eyes and expression are far from offended. “Not just their
bodies, their biology. The shell that they live in that keeps them alive?
“What’s that got to do with anything?” Izaya pushes his arms out, palms
upturned in a question. “I don’t need to know about cellular respiration or
whatever it is you talk about to understand humanity. Sometimes I won't always
understand it but that's what makes it more fun to figure out. They’re all so
different, so messy.”
“I was thinking more along the lines of brain chemistry, geez Izaya. But
anyway, think about it, what if there’s nothing really to understand?” Shinra
pauses excitedly like he's about to reveal something amazing. He always gets
this way when he starts talking about anything involving medicine or science.
“Of course there is, haven’t you been listening to anything I’ve said?” Izaya
asks, not even looking at him.
“yeah but it could all be pointless though; just chemicals in the brain
dictating our actions. Eat, sleep, procreate,” Shinra counts his fingers
carelessly. “I think people are just animals that evolved to care about trivial
things past surviving.”
“You would say such things about me and my humans?”
Shinra laughs lightly, “You’re not exactly a normal person, Izaya. But that's
just my opinion. Eh, it doesn’t really matter.”
“Yes your opinion doesn't matter. Hate to tell you, Shinra, but you are wrong
about everything. Besides you don’t really have any authority on a subject you
hardly care about.”
“Hey, you’re right about that,” Shinra says far too easily. Izaya doesn’t know
why this guy insists on playing his friend, he can’t help but get the feeling
that he’s faking all of it. He never gets angry or irritated with Izaya’s
strange antics and personality. Whereas most people would curl their lip
hearing about some of Izaya’s opinions, Shinra nods, and smiles.
If he looks at it objectively, it does make sense though. Shinra's just as
strange as him and doesn’t exactly have any friends either. That he knows of.
But it's still… bizarre.
They reach the part of their walk where they go their separate ways. “See you
Monday, Izaya.”
Izaya waves and walks the rest of the way home.
He doesn’t like to spend too much time at his house for several reasons.
Whether because of his sisters or how unbearably empty and lifeless it feels,
or the unpleasant memories of his childhood. But it's usually ok if he stays in
his room. He decides to spend some time catching up on homework that his
teachers gave him ahead of time to make up for his lost time away.
Before, he might have ignored their requests, even Shizuo's, but his last
chance would be wasted if he failed out of school because of his grades. It’s
tedious work but he finishes it with time to spare. He goes to bed and falls
asleep thinking about a familiar growl in his ears, tight holds on his body,
brute, rough treatment. He distantly hopes he can keep his voice down when the
time comes. He wouldn't want to ruin everything he's worked so hard to build.
But what if he really does come next time, damn it. What would Shizuo's
expression look like if he saw that? Out of nowhere, he remembers the fearful
look on Shizuo’s face after he pulled Izaya out of his fight. It's so out of
place on him, he thinks.
It ruins his dream and his night.
 
------
Two weeks have finally reached their end and Izaya can hardly contain his
giddiness. Soon he will receive the proverbial beating of his life and he’s
going to love it. He’ll have to endure his parents’ presence when they return
but he’s gotten used to them a long time ago. His bruises have turned yellow
and greenish-brown, one step away from fading to nothing. Things are going
well.
Boy, it feels good to be back. He walks airily from class to class when he’s
back at school next Monday. He was stared at by many of his classmates and if
he didn’t have his eyes set on his treat at the end of the day, he might have
bothered to find out the thoughts behind the looks. Curiosity? Awe? Confusion?
He has better things to think about right now. Shinra asks again if he's
worried at all about detention, clearly still mildly confused by Izaya's
positive attitude. Izaya tells him he's not afraid in the least and that the
detentions mean nothing to him. “It’s gonna take more than what that brute can
dish out to put a dent in me.”
He can’t help the way the corners of his mouth tug upwards when he enters his
last class. He doesn’t take his eyes off Shizuo for the entire period. Shizuo,
who sticks out like a sore thumb for his anger and his appearance. He, on the
other hand, doesn’t look at Izaya one single time. If Izaya didn't know any
better, he'd say Shizuo didn't miss him at all. The poor man must be angry
about the fact Izaya has forced his hand.
This will be the first time Shizuo will punish him while being fully aware of
Izaya's masochism. It'll surely be an interesting experience. Izaya won't let
himself feel awkward about it unless he makes another stupid embarrassing
sound.
The bell rings and the rest of the class is dismissed. Izaya stays seated, not
bothering to go to his locker for the rest of his things. He idly puts his
notebooks away when they're finally alone again.
Shizuo gives him the first cursory glance of the entire day and then goes back
to ignoring him while he tidies up his desk. He hasn’t told him to come up
there yet, and he wonders what’s taking him so long. “I’m gonna tell you now.
No back talking and no bullshit.”
“That's what you're opening with?" You aren’t going to ask how I’ve been,
Shizu-chan? Aren’t you happy to see me?”
“I’d be happier going to the dentist, flea.”
“Ouch. That was just mean, Shizu-chan.”
“I told you before, don’t fucking call me that!” Shizuo barks out, slamming a
fist on his desk. Izaya ignores him.
“I expected to get a much warmer welcome than this. Surely, you’re capable of
the social niceties the rest of us are equipped with?”
“Welcome back, you pain in the ass,” he replies tersely.
Izaya chuckles. He watches Shizuo's frown deepen perhaps in regret in his
choice of words. He reaches into his desk drawer and Izaya’s heart begins to
speed up. But Shizuo doesn't take out a paddle, instead, he brings out a stack
of thick folders and carries them to him. Shizuo drops them on his desk.
“What’s this?” Izaya asks flippantly.
“This is what you’ll be working on while you’re in here with me. I decided to
add a little extra to your punishment cause of how serious your recent offense
was.” Shizuo explains gruffly. “You’re going to help me grade some tests and-”
Izaya cuts him off with a sharp laugh.
“That’s funny Shizu-chan, aha, oh wow,” he giggles, “I never thought I’d see
the day you actually admit you’re an incompetent teacher. You’re in desperate
need of help, I’m sure, but it’s not exactly my problem is it?”
Shizuo curls his lip, and his eyes go dark and threatening. Izaya smirks up at
him around another laugh and waits, breath catching a little. Shizuo looks away
and stares pointedly at the wall behind him for a few seconds like he’s
counting backward from ten in his head. His nostrils flare and he looks back
down at Izaya.
“You… You’re going to do it,” he grinds out. “It’s part of your detention and
if you don’t then you can sit there and rot for all I care until I decide you
can leave, understand?”
Izaya’s smirk vanishes. “How could you stop me? I can just walk out of that
door right now if I feel like it. Like I always have.”
“Ha. You could, except that counts as an unexcused absence which will get you
expelled. I know Akirawa-san already explained everything, none of this should
be news to you.
“I showed up, that’s what we agreed on.” Izaya is getting more annoyed by the
second; this is not the way things were supposed to end up! He came here for
one thing only and expected to get it, not sit around and wade through this
paperwork.
“Don’t act cute. You know the deal is that you stay for these fucking
detentions.” Shizuo turns on his heel and walks back to his desk. Izaya’s hands
curl on his desk and he leans forward.
“I’m confused,” Izaya says, raising his voice, “am I, or am I not going to
actually get a real punishment? I thought you were serious about helping me
‘get better,’ Sensei. What happened to that?”
“I will never do that again. This is what your detention is going to be. You
can either stay here or walk out that door and get expelled.” Shizuo jams his
finger towards the door.
Izaya freezes in shock. Numbing cold spreads through his body as he's faced
with the final truth. All this wait, all this anticipation, it was still all
for nothing. For the second time, he's been made into a fool. Heat slowly
creeps along his cheeks but he doesn’t realize it until it’s too late and that
makes the feeling worse. He stands up and storms for the door in a familiar
haze of anger and the ever annoying hint of embarrassment. There’s no point in
ever coming back here again. But before he gets the chance to open the door,
Shizuo intercepts him quickly and shuts it.
“Oh no you don’t, bastard. You aren’t fucking this up again for yourself,” he
tugs his arm and drags him back to his seat, his grip is so tight it might
bruise. The smirk that had left Izaya’s face is back full force. “I take back
that back and I'll make myself very clear,” Izaya pulls himself free. “This
might be a game to you but it's not. You don't have a choice in this and you
aren't going to leave whenever you want. I won’t allow it.”
Izaya snorts, smug as ever. He sits back down and tilts his head coyly. “Should
you be making it so easy for me to call your bluffs, Shizu-chan? I think you
should work on that. I knew you couldn’t just let me leave.”
“Just shut up and start that already.” Shizuo signals at the stack of work and
returns to his desk.
Izaya eyes the door again but knows any attempts to leave now would be
fruitless. He slumps down and crosses his arms.
“Oh, I won’t do it. You said I could just sit here and do nothing so that’s
exactly what I’m going to do.” Shizuo visibly seethes but he plops down at his
desk again and continues putting grades up on his computer and looking through
older assignments.
“They’ll be there waiting for you tomorrow, then.”
 
Well, this is amounting to a whole lot of nothing. Izaya wants to feel like a
fool, an idiot that got carried away again, for thinking he won before even
getting to the finish line. He was so sure he had him this time. But this
failure is different. He's having more trouble feeling angry about it than last
time because of the surprising satisfaction he felt at the revelation that
Shizuo won’t let him go. It's clear now that he's lost the war. But somehow it
doesn't feel like he has. Maybe this is just one more battle of many to come.
Izaya weighs his options carefully now that he’s got himself under control. He
reasons that if he does get expelled, it would greatly decrease the number of
opportunities for Izaya to torment Shizuo and consume every wonderful reaction
he gets out of him. He wouldn't want to lose that. Still, he could always just
harass him outside of school. Finding out what kind of personal life the beast
has could prove to be very amusing, and there are fewer restrictions out there.
But he scraps that idea quickly as he doesn't want Shizuo to actually kill him
out on the streets. He looks at the man in question who’s engrossed in
something on his computer resting his head in his hand. From appearance alone,
no one would think he'd be capable of such things. It still baffles him and
fascinates him.
Ultimately, who is he to turn down the perfect opportunity to have Shizuo all
to himself to toy with? For months?. Perhaps this is another gift in disguise.
Plus, who’s to say his chances of getting spanked again are gone. All it takes
is one really, really bad day.
Being so lost in his head Izaya doesn’t notice when two hours go by. That seems
to be how long Shizuo plans to keep him here every day. Shizuo packs up his
things and dismisses him coldly. Izaya is confident he knows which direction
he’s going to take tomorrow. But of all the things he considers, he adamantly
refuses to think about Shizuo’s reasons for keeping him here. He has a few
vague guesses but he carefully locks them away in the back of his mind. It’s
not important.
“I expect you to be here tomorrow, Izaya.”
It’s definitely not important.
----
The next day during his lunch period, Shinra asks him how it went. Izaya knows
what he means by that question. Lying is an option he often goes with but
instead he tells the truth. “Nothing happened. The coward couldn’t do
anything.” He can’t bring himself to pretend to be happy about that.
“Holy crap! That’s amazing, how did you get him to stop?”
“By playing him of course, just like I always planned to,” he says like he's
trying to get the conversation over with. So much for the honest route.
“That’s very vague but ok. It must have been something huge if it got someone
like Sensei to stop.”
Izaya is unpleasantly reminded of the embarrassing cry he released when Shizuo
spanked him. “Creatures like Shizu-chan are very easily manipulated since they
don’t have much going on upstairs Shinra. It was a piece of cake.” Ha. If only.
“Still, though. It sucks you have to stay after school every day. Maybe you
should have focused your efforts on that.” Shinra chuckles. Izaya rolls his
eyes.
“Thanks, Shinra. You’re so much help.” Izaya says, voice dripping with sarcasm.
“I try!” he grins.
“I might not even go back, honestly.”
“Didn’t you say you’d get expelled if you don’t?” Shinra furrows his brow.
“Yeah but,” he waves his hands around, “I don’t really need school anymore.
I’ve already learned everything I need to. I don’t think it’d be such a big
deal.”
“You should probably think that through all the way. But what do I know?”
“Shinra, don’t act like that. You could drop out too and not have it hurt you
in the least. You’re pretty much set because of your father.”
“It’s true, but if I’m going to get an honest job, I need an actual degree.”
“Then don’t get an honest job,” Izaya leans in with a sly grin.
“You’re a terrible influence! We’ll see where the road takes me. You really
should stay though, what'll I do here when you're gone?”
“Find new friends, duh.”
They hear the bell ring through the roof access door and Izaya gets up to
leave. One more class before Shizuo’s.
“Actually, there is this new friend I’ve made-”
“Tell me about it later, I can’t be late now that I’m trying to be a good
student. See ya.” He bids farewell.
Shinra rolls his eyes at being interrupted but he goes back to writing letters
in his notebook. He waves without looking as Izaya leaves.
He has trouble sitting through biology. Partly, it’s because they’re now
reviewing for a test on the unit that he missed two weeks of. But he already
finished all the homework from those entire two weeks all in one day, so it’s
agonizing to sit through the completely useless information being rehashed. Not
to mention, they’d be performing a dissection tomorrow Shinra wasn’t joking
around.
And the other reason, of course, is the anticipation. Why does he still feel
it? Shizuo was very clear and firm in his decision to never spank him again.
There is absolutely no reason why such a feeling would linger, knowing full
well there’s nothing to expect anymore.
He won’t dwell on it. There’s no point going in circles in his mind if he can’t
figure it out on his own and he also wants to make sure he has fun making
Shizuo uncomfortable and irritated. Maybe that's all he's excited about.
Biology is thankfully over and done with and he can head to his final class of
the day. He moves swiftly through the halls, not paying attention to anyone. He
walks past Shinra at his locker who at this point knows that trying to get
Izaya's attention while heading to Shizuo's class would be pointless.
He walks in with a neutral expression though it turns cold when he sees Shizuo
distracted by one of his classmates, one of the brown nosers that is. They’re
the only ones aside from himself that aren’t afraid to approach Shizuo, except
they approach him with questions and requests for feedback. Izaya sits down in
his seat and stares icily at the two talking inaudibly until the student goes
back to their seat and Izaya can get a good look at Shizuo today.
As class goes on, he watches him with undivided attention. He’s scratching his
head more than usual and his hands twitch towards his pockets sometimes when
they’re close to his lap. It’s not obvious at all but Izaya is good at looking
closely. He’s teetering and Izaya wants to give the last helpful nudge over the
edge.
Shizuo is in the middle of a lecture, explaining the text they’re reading, when
Izaya shouts loudly, startling everyone including Shizuo, “SHIZU-CHAN!”
Shizuo jumps a little to Izaya’s delight. He should really wipe the taunting
grin off his face but he can’t, it was so hilarious. Shizuo snaps his head in
Izaya’s direction, and he glares viciously at him with sharp, threatening eyes.
He gets stares from everyone around the room but they quickly flit to their
teacher for his reaction.
Izaya smiles even though he knows he won’t push it any further. But Shizuo
waits, daring Izaya to try something else. Izaya says, “Sorry, I just had a
question.”
“What,” Shizuo snaps brusquely.
“Oh uhm… I forgot. Sorry,” he squints in a poor attempt at looking sheepish.
Shizuo growls but he forces out the rest of the lecture to the class ignoring
the grin still on Izaya's face. The rest of the class, however, look at each
other in confusion.
When the bell rings, Izaya gathers his things and strides confidently past
Shizuo’s desk. He spares him a cheerful glance before saying, “See ya, Shizu-
chan.”
“Listen,” the word is so roughly spat out it makes Izaya pause, “Detention
starts at 3:00, you have 15 minutes to get back here on time.
Or else, he doesn't have to say. Izaya leaves. He goes to his locker to pack
the rest of his stuff and carefully thinks hard about what he’ll do next. He
thinks he already knows anyway but there’s always a little more time for
impulsive ideas. He walks around the school going in no direction, in
particular, waiting for 3:00 pm to come and go. As 2:55 comes around, Izaya
thinks he should maybe go back. A different part of him wants to get there
late, just to spite him but it’s a risk he’d prefer not to take.
It reads 2:58 on the hallway clocks now as he walks to Shizuo’s classroom as
slowly as possible, refusing to come back until the last minute. He pictures
Shizuo reading the clock every few seconds, he’s jumpy enough today for that to
be a possibility.
Time is up and he’s right there at the door. Shizuo's back is turned to him,
standing by the window looking down at the students streaming out of the
building. Sensing someone there, he turns around sharply and stares at Izaya in
surprise.
“Don’t look so shocked,” Izaya teases but Shizuo seems not to hear him. His
surprise turns into something else Izaya doesn’t recognize for a second. He
looks relieved. Izaya ignores all the questions and objections flying around in
his head and sits down.
Chapter End Notes
     What did you guys think?? Apologies for being so late and also if
     this chapter seemed off for those that read it when it came out, it's
     been edited and finalized.
     The next chapter, maybe even the next two chapters probably won't
     take as long because they're partially drafted already but after
     that, updates will be inconsistent again.
     Stay tuned! Thanks for sticking with this fic.
     EDIT 1/10/18 Hi guys I feel terrible for making you wait this long
     but I don't want to rush chapters and have them be really shitty.
     This fic is NOT dropped, don't worry, it's still in progress. I'm
     just taking really long to do it :c You will have it some time in the
     future, also if you haven't, please re-read chapter 5 there are some
     pretty important updates and changes to it (kinda).
***** Chapter 6 *****
Chapter Summary
     Shizuo begins the grueling task of keeping Izaya in detention and
     Izaya never backs down. (Heavily dialogue oriented)
Chapter Notes
     Wow um so I'm appalled with myself at how long I took to write this
     chapter. I'm very sorry for that. It's not a trend I want to
     continue. It was very hard for me to write this chapter, I knew I
     needed to write it though for the sake of the plot and stuff though
     so I forced myself to do it. The next chapter is already drafted for
     the most part whereas I had to write this one from scratch. It was
     SUPPOSED to get uploaded Saturday but I was hit by a stomach bug and
     my attention left me.
     One other thing! If you haven't already please re-read chapter 5,
     I've added some semi-important changes to it and if you want Izaya
     getting sexual you'll go read it hehe
     Happy belated birthday to Shizuo! Here's everyone's present on his
     behalf xD please enjoy~
See the end of the chapter for more notes
There’s a silence at first. It’s the strangest thing he’s ever experienced with
the infamous faculty member. Shizuo returns to his desk stiffly like he wasn’t
just waiting by the window watching and waiting for Izaya to leave through the
front gates.
Izaya watches him with a smirk but doesn’t comment on his behavior. He makes a
point of disregarding the stack of folders left on his desk though to see if
Shizuo says something about it but he remains silent for a few moments. The
last thing he expects is Shizuo opening with-
“Thanks for… showing up,” he says roughly, like he's annoyed he is doing this.
Izaya blinks, briefly stunned by him. He giggles. “You’re trying that? You
don't actually think playing nice will get me to do this work do you?” he asks
incredulously.
“You will do it.” Shizuo responds oddly calm, like he's certain it's going to
happen.
“No, Shizu-chan,” he moves the pile to another desk, “I won't. “
“If you're not going to do what I tell you, then how about you answer a few
questions?”
“Questions?” Izaya repeats.
“Tell me why you got into that fight.” It sounds more like an order than a
request. Of all things to ask, why this? How random. But since Shizuo’s been in
the habit of subverting Izaya’s every expectation at every turn, he shouldn't
even be surprised.
Izaya smirks. “Didn’t you hear? I wanted to save that poor boy from being
bullied. I'm something like a hero around here now.”
Shizuo deadpans.
“I don’t know what you want me to say, Sensei. Really, I was just trying to
help,” he insists. Shizuo won’t believe him though, not while Izaya says all
this with a glint in his eye and the widest shit-eating grin ever.
“I’m waiting for you to answer me for real, shithead.”
“Sensei, what other reason could there possibly be?” Izaya asks in a reasonable
tone and drawling out ‘Sensei’. He couldn’t care less about what they’re
talking about but he is having fun taunting Shizuo.
“Cut the shit you snot-nosed brat. I am not kidding around,” Shizuo assures
him.
“I was already questioned about this, though,” Izaya knits his brows in
confusion though his grin still hasn't left. “Don’t you know? I told Akirawa-
san everything that happened just like you did.”
Shizuo bristles at that. Both of them know he didn’t. Akirawa didn’t bother
asking for Izaya’s side of the story first and stupidly fed him everything his
dear professor had told him.
Izaya smirks sweetly at him, tilting his head. “There’s nothing more to say.
You know the whole story.”
“You and I both know that ‘story’ is a fucking lie.”
Izaya laughs boisterously at Shizuo’s unexpected honesty, actually caught off
guard. Shizuo grimaces and his shoulders hunch as if the sound grates his ears.
Izaya settles down and sighs lightly. “Ok fine, Shizu-chan. It was a means to
an end. I thought I already made it perfectly obvious that I’m willing to do
whatever it takes to get what I want. Didn't you notice that by now?”
“No, that story isn’t true either.”
Izaya raises his eyebrows curiously and smiles, “what about it isn't true,
Shizu-chan?”
“You would have had that fight right outside my classroom if that were true.
Instead I found you two dicking around in the hall by the cafeteria, out of
pure chance. I think I’ve endured enough of your ploys to know how to tell the
difference.”
Izaya’s good mood is beginning to sour but he’s careful to keep his airy
attitude in place. Shizuo isn’t supposed to be this damn insightful?
“What does it matter if I planned it or not?” Izaya shrugs. “I still got in
trouble either way, which is what I wanted. It means it had nothing to do with
you.”
“It has everything to do with me, brat. That’s why I’m responsible for all the
crazy shit you’ve done. That makes it my business to know.”
“Wait, I’m confused. You just said that my fight had nothing to do with you,
and now you’re saying the opposite? Forgive me, Sensei but that makes no sense.
Are you feeling alright? Have you been working yourself too hard? Wait…” his
eyes widen as if he had a sudden revelation. His smile broadens, “Are you –are
you really more upset that I did something bad and it had nothing to do with
you this time?” He smiles wryly, “wow, and here I thought I was self-centered.”
“That’s not what I said,” Shizuo barks but Izaya is only getting started.
“But it is isn’t it? Did you grow fond of all the attention I gave you Shizu-
chan? Aww,” he pouts in mock pity. “You must have been so jealous.”
Shizuo slams his hands on his desk and stands up. “Quit that! I know what
you’re trying to do, you sneaky fuck. It isn’t going to work.”
“Really? It usually works.”
“Stop jumping around the subject and tell me what’s going on Izaya-kun. Tell me
why you’ve been so damn reckless. It’s getting ridiculous.” He’s looking him
dead in the eye. He looks determined, not angry.
“So that’s what you want to know. Did I miss something here? Since when do you
care about me being ‘reckless’? I am just fine, thank you very much. Except,”
he adds on as if just remembering, “I seem to have this behavior problem that
you don’t seem to be taking seriously. So I suggest that if you want that
recklessness to stop, stick to what you know best: yelling and breaking and
hitting. Because the pathetic counselor act is not working for you, at all.”
Shizuo is showing teeth now. The tips of his ears are flushed red. “Watch your
fucking mouth, Izaya. You’re really pushing it. Why is this so important to
you!”
This conversation is no longer fun. Izaya isn’t going to keep playing. “Why are
you overthinking this so much? You know you don’t have to think past your quota
for the day right?”
“Izaya!”
“Shizuo!” Izaya mimics. Shizuo’s eyes widen briefly in shock at Izaya’s brief
immaturity and the use of his first name.
“God damn it you are insufferable!” Shizuo yells through clenched teeth. He
abruptly stands up and stomps out of the room. Izaya watches him slightly
alarmed but Shizuo doesn't leave, he stays outside the door pacing. Izaya rolls
his eyes. Just what he needs, Shizuo still trying so hard to be normal.
He shakes his head and looks at the stack of assignments on his desk, then at
Shizuo, and back at the pile. His lips curve as he takes them to the cracked
open window. By the time Shizuo sees and runs inside to stop him, Izaya has
managed to throw out a good week’s worth of assignments giggling happily all
the while.
“Stop!” Shizuo yanks Izaya’s hands back and saves the rest of the pile but the
damage is done. He helplesspy watches the unlucky pages float and flutter all
the way down to the grounds of the school. He slowly turns to Izaya, his eyes
brimming with contempt, ready to snap at any second. The papers in his hands
crumble easily under the force of his grip. Izaya grins with cruel amusement.
“If you even say just one, more, word-”
Izaya steps right up to him, and tilts his head up defiantly. Shizuo may tower
over him in height but Izaya isn’t intimidated at all, “What? What will you
do?”
Shizuo is slightly taken aback by his brazenness but his glare doesn't falter.
Neither of them move an inch for several moments. Shizuo slowly eases his grip
on the papers in his hands and takes a deep breath, brows furrowed deeper with
exertion, as he rubs at his eyes with a single hand. “I’m sick of this.”
Izaya watches in disappointment as Shizuo pulls himself back together. It’s not
fair. It feels like yet another betrayal. He’s about to back down like a coward
and turn away but Izaya yanks his arm back around. It's the first time in his
life he put his hands on a teacher. “No, you answer me now. I just disobeyed
you. So what are you going to do about it?" Izaya demands incessantly.
Shizuo yanks his arm back viciously. “We're going to finish this conversation
another time. Get back to your seat.” He backs away from Izaya turning around
to smooth out the papers. He stands there, shoulders still tense.
“Nothing but empty threats,” Izaya spits disdainfully. “What happened? You've
become truly pathetic. Grow some balls for god’s sake.”
“Shut the fuck up!” Shizuo bellows. Izaya is thrilled at how easy it is to flip
his switch. He’s utterly carried away by it.
“No, thanks.”
“Sit your ass down, now!” His voice gets so loud it shakes Izaya to his bones.
“No!” Izaya fires back harder.
“Do. It.” There’s a threat in his eyes and Izaya invites it.
“Make me,” he says evenly. His pulse jumps when Shizuo actually comes back and
drags him directly to his seat. Izaya couldn't stop him even if he tried. His
blood pumps hot through his veins when he's forced to sit, knees giving out
under the pressure of Shizuo’s hand pushing down on his shoulder. The desperate
need for that pressure to be on the back of his neck, bending him over, and
keeping him down overwhelms him. He almost trembles at the thought.
For the first time he's painfully aware of how much influence Shizuo could have
on him if he really understood what he had over Izaya. Thank god he's an idiot.
Shizuo bends down to get in his face and any thoughts in his head die
immediately.
“You sit right here and don’t dare fucking move. If you ever damage any of my
shit again, I’ll get the principal to add mandatory custodial duty to your
detention. Are we clear?”
Izaya can’t tear his eyes away from the smoldering fire in Shizuo’s eyes. He
forgets he’s supposed to give a response. Shizuo repeats himself with each
syllable emanating authority.
“Are. We. Clear?”
“Shouldn’t you be getting those assignments right now? The wind might blow them
away and you'll lose them forever,” Izaya says conversationally. But his heart
is pounding and Shizuo’s face still hasn’t changed so he’s committing all the
details of Shizuo’s expression to memory. His cheeks feel warm.
“Oh you'd like that wouldn't you? Let me worry about that, louse.” Shizuo
straightens up and Izaya hates the way he instantly relaxes the moment he walks
away.
“If you’re worried about leaving me alone in your classroom, there’s no need.
I’ll wait right here while you get those assignments, I promise!” Izaya says
with a hand on his heart.
Shizuo ignores him much to his irritation and continues to ignore him for the
rest of detention until he releases him at 5:15. Izaya sulks the whole the
time.
“Go home. And just so you know, our conversation isn't over. I'm going to keep
asking until I get something out of you. Unless you start grading those papers
that is.”
“Good luck,” Izaya flashes a grin that doesn't reach his eyes and he leaves.
Who does that moron think he is? Izaya liked him so much better when he was a
pretty face who had one default emotion, anger. He was so simple then. Even
after Shizuo has asserted that he'll never hit him again, he couldn't leave
Izaya be.
He'll humor his professor and let him indulge in his savior fantasies since
they’ll ultimately result in failure. Really, it’ll be Izaya who will be
indulging himself. The man is a goldmine of untempered rage and he plans to
take full advantage of that while he can. He doesn’t go home right away. He
waits for Shizuo to exit the building and watches him pick up every page off
the ground one by one.
                                  ----------
Izaya eats out and then goes home. His sisters are doing something together on
the couch, he doesn’t see what because he goes straight to his room. He sits on
his bed in the dark and tries to find anything else online about his professor.
He most likely lives in the city and with that temper and strength, has to have
made quite a presence at least once, maybe when he was younger. But just like
he'd said to Shinra there was nothing but vague rumors and hardly anything
concrete.
The week already got off to a bad start when Shizuo refused Izaya yet again.
Then, Shizuo unexpectedly grows some urgent need to intrude on Izaya’s personal
business.
But Izaya can see now that things can get worse from there. In a day's time
they would have to perform a dissection in biology. He heard other students
talking about it earlier who’d had the class in the morning. Shinra wasn't
messing around.
Izaya can hardly stand gore in movies, let alone see a real dead thing. It
turns his stomach and reminds him of his own eventual fate. He once saw
roadkill in his neighborhood when he was younger and couldn't get the image out
of his head for weeks. And they expect him to cut a frog open himself.
He didn't plan on skipping any classes so soon after his suspension, but he
doesn’t hesitate. Screw biology. Screw Raira Academy. He'll be better off
dropping out and never coming back. But for now he just walks to the farthest
bathroom in the west hall which will take him to the roof. It isn't necessary
for my learning, he thinks needlessly to himself as he enters the bathroom
before classes resume. He waits for the halls to empty out to avoid running
into teachers. Shizuo is the only one that would prove to be a problem of
course but he's in the middle of a class at this time, so it'll be alright.
He waits there a little longer than he should. He’s suddenly reminded of the
fateful day he rushed into one of these after Shizuo took his punishment a step
further. It isn't the same stall exactly but they’re all identical anyway. He
remembers how it was the closest he’s gotten to coming without being touched.
At the time, it was so fresh in his mind and on his ass that it left him weak
in the knees and trembling against the stall wall while he climaxed.
He stares at the stall now with an immense feeling of dejection. He'll never
get that feeling back and he almost hates Shizuo for taking it away.
When it's time to leave he makes his way to his destination. He sneaks past a
copier room quick and quiet as he can in case anyone’s inside and he thinks
he's in the clear until he turns a corner and slams into the last person he
wanted to see. Shizuo might as well be a brick wall because it causes Izaya to
stumble back.
They both look startled for a moment, but Shizuo recovers first. He narrows his
eyes and frowns. “Izaya-kun” Shizuo growls. He has him pressed against the
lockers in seconds. “Don't you have class?!”
“Well I was just-”
“You know what's at stake, don't you? You already know I lied for you and
you're still willing to risk everything just to skip one fucking class?”
Shizuo’s eyes are aflame with anger again but it's not the same vengeful hatred
he saw yesterday. Izaya curls his lip.
“I don’t owe you anything,” he says defensively.
Shizuo returns the sneer. “Yeah, well neither do I,” he says lowly and starts
pulling him by the arm in the direction Izaya came from.
“Wait, Shizu-chan–”
“Tch. You still have the nerve to call me that in the position you're in.”
Izaya tries to plant his feet but it's useless. Shizuo just keeps walking and
Izaya has no alternative besides walking with him or being dragged. The closer
they get to his biology class, the more anxiety he feels. Damn, the brute is
really going to make him say it. Why did he have to run into him?
“Stop, I-I really don't want to be in biology today.”
“I've heard it all before, brat. Save it,” he doesn’t even spare him a glance
as he continues to pull him along.
I hate you so much, he yells in his head. He has to convince Shizuo somehow,
what should he say? He loathes to tell the truth but it just might be his only
way out. Just get it over with, just swallow your pride and get it over with.
“Listen to me! I… I don't…They're dissecting frogs today and –I don't want to…”
Izaya confesses like there are rocks in his mouth, then even quieter says, “I
really don't want to be there…around that.” Curse Shizuo, ever since his last
real detention, Shizuo has taken every chance to humiliate and demean him.
Shizuo stops walking at last and silence stretches between them. He finally
turns around, “Are you telling the truth?”
“Yes,” Izaya grits out, containing a sigh of relief. Shizuo stares back
shrewdly for a couple of moments and Izaya feels like the ant under the
magnifying glass for once.
“It upsets you.”
“Do I really need to draw it out in little pictures for you, idiot?” Izaya says
irately, trying to pull free.
The hand on his wrist tightens dangerously. “Don't push me, unless you want me
to take you back. Because I can and I will.” His eyes flit down briefly, “you
know you can get out of those kinds of things with a signed form from your
parents right?”
Shouldn't he just be taking him straight to class or the office by now? Izaya
sighs impatiently through his nose. “That's not really an option for me, ok?
Don't make me go back.” He orders, refusing to say please.
Shizuo’s eyes soften and Izaya has to look away. It's the second time he's seen
that look and it confuses him profusely. Out of the corner of his eye he sees
Shizuo look down in thought, a soft crease forming between his brows. “I can't
just let you skip class. There are rules,” he reminds Izaya who grandly rolls
his eyes. Shizuo ignores it.
“But look, I can do this instead. I'll take you to the office and you’ll stay
there for the rest of this period. Rather than it go on your record, your
punishment will be extra time in detention today.”
“Because my record isn't already past saving. My hero,” Izaya swoons
sarcastically. Of course he had an ulterior motive for helping. He just wanted
more time interrogating Izaya in detention. God how infuriating he is.
“It’s past saving when you get expelled.” Shizuo frowns sternly at him and
asks, “is it ok to let go of you or are you going to try and run?”
Izaya smirks and shrugs flippantly. Shizuo grumbles and decides to keep the
tight grip on his uniform as they walk to the office. Izaya wasn't really
planning on running away though.
                                  ----------
He supposes he should be thankful Shizuo cut him a little slack, he was
prepared to do anything to get out that class, but his mercy did not come
without a price. Two extra hours in detention; he doesn't know if that's a good
or a bad thing.
Despite how much yesterday sucked, there were moments Izaya was close again to
what he used to feel back when Shizuo used the paddle, the wild beating in his
heart, the prickling heat on his skin, and there’s an unbelievable itching want
that he thought he might never get to experience again. It was the expression
on Shizuo’s face when he sat him down forcefully in his seat that did it.
Shizuo’s sudden interest in his personal business is a disappointing setback,
but Izaya might be able to gain the upper hand in some way if he continues to
push him.
Shizuo drops him off at the empty detention room in the office to be watched by
a stout middle aged woman who always wearing a perpetual look of suspicion
every time he sees her. And he sees her a lot with the reputation he has. Izaya
casually kicks back his feet on his desk and smirks at the woman but Shizuo
snaps his fingers at him and makes him take his feet down. He puts them back up
after he leaves and the woman pointedly ignores him as she shuffles through
paperwork. He’s supposed to do makeup work but he doesn't touch it.
When it’s time, he’s escorted to his last class of the day. Thankfully he’s one
of the first there. He usually tries to be the very first but things have been
too irregular lately, he’s been irregular. Shizuo’s still sitting at his desk
and Izaya wills himself to ignore the nagging memory of what happened earlier.
Izaya approaches him with a well-meaning smile and leans over him.
“Hi.” Shizuo looks up apprehensively through his brows, not lifting his head.
“I was just wondering if you managed to find all those papers I dropped
yesterday. It’d be a shame if some of the students didn’t get their assignments
back.”
Shizuo only glares, his jaw clenched tight. But he slowly lifts his head and
looks away. He calls over another student who had just walked in. “Sonohara-
san, please come here. I wanted to talk to you about your essay.”
Izaya curves his lip in a smirk, and backs into his seat. Fine, let him be that
way. He can let him keep some semblance of control during class. It’s the
merciful thing to do now that Izaya has decided to save all of his attitude for
later. He can hardly wait.
He pays the lectures no mind but Shizuo doesn’t do anything about it. Once
class gets dismissed, he’s sitting there nodding off in his palm. He hadn’t
gotten much sleep last night. He was plagued by Shizuo’s strange interrogation
and what they might mean.
“Izaya,” a loud clasp rings out by his ear, “wake up, it’s not naptime.”
Izaya jolts in his seat just to be dramatic. “Uh? Oh thank god, class is
finally over. I thought it would never end.” Shizuo rolls his eyes where he
stands in front of Izaya, towering over him in the way Izaya likes. He loves
being in close proximity to him. Hopefully today will be filled to the brim
with threats and aggression and not placating eyes.
“Too bad you have detention right after,” Shizuo says, continuing to stand by
him. Izaya notices the same stack of folders as yesterday when Shizuo lays them
out on Izaya's desk. He clears his throat, “How...how did it go earlier? I hope
the supplementary material that was given to you was enough.”
Izaya stares at Shizuo like he just grew a second head. “I didn’t do it,” he
scoffs.
Shizuo frowns. “You better do it! By tomorrow at the latest or else you will
have to do the real thing. I already spoke with your biology professor.”
“Why did you do that?” Izaya asks with a lilt in his voice. He doesn’t think
about the implications of this or any of the other odd changes in Shizuo’s
actions.
“Because you’re not failing on my watch, flea. I’m not going to have you held
back so I’ll have to keep seeing your despicable face one more year.”
Izaya laughs heartily at that. The idea sounds hilarious. He imagines staying
another year just to spite Shizuo, what a riot that would be. Not that he’d
bother wasting an extra year of his life in school.
“I’m looking forward to it actually.”
Shizuo clenches his jaw and his throat works like he’s kept himself from saying
something rash. Izaya raises an eyebrow and Shizuo takes a deep breath. “Are
you going to do as I say this time?”
“If you’re asking me again to be your lapdog, I graciously refuse.” He flashes
a facetious smile and props his feet atop his desk. “I’ll be fine right here.”
“Put your fucking feet down,” Shizuo growls and shoves Izaya’s feet off the
table with enough force to swing his whole body sideways but the action also
sends all the folders scattering to the floor. Izaya’s smile widens and a
giggle escapes him for a mere second before Shizuo grunts angrily and yanks him
to his feet by the front of his shirt.
“Hey, hey, it wasn’t my fault that time,” he raises his hands in surrender but
there’s nothing he can do about the obscene grin and the snickering laughs.
They are almost nose to nose and Shizuo looks downright prepared to commit
murder. He casts his eyes down at him and back up, then pushes him back to his
seat.
“You’ll clean that up this time,” he says stepping back folding his arms. “But
later. We have things to discuss.”
“No we do not Shizu-chan.” Like hell he's trying this again.
“Then you'll do the work?”
“No.”
“Then I’m not going to stop asking. You can talk to me, just like you did
earlier,” He adds much softer and the calm from before infects his gaze once
again.
“Earlier?? That was just a lie I told you just to get out of class and you
stupidly believed it. Sorry if you thought we shared a moment.” The gentleness
that had warmed Shizuo’s eyes wilts away and is replaced by hardness. Good.
“You looked scared shitless to me, flea. You’re not that good an actor.”
“You’ll believe what you want to believe,” Izaya shrugs and shakes off the
irritation creeping under his skin.
“Just stop this already. Seriously. Talking to me won't be as bad as you think.
Tell me what happened the day of the fight.”
“I already told you there’s nothing left to say! I felt like getting into a
fight so I did. I wanted to get in trouble so I did.”
“You’re smart, Izaya. A lot smarter than that.” Izaya balks at him, his mouth
is open, ready to spill contempt and vitriol but he can’t actually think of
anything to say. “Something's going on with you and I’ve waited too long to
really do something about it. If you tell me, I can-”
Izaya finally finds his voice, “you can do what? Even if there was anything to
tell, I wouldn’t say anything to you. You’re the last person on earth I’d ever
talk to after what you did.”
It strikes a different cord than Izaya expected. Shizuo is speechless, his eyes
go wide and fearful, the same as they were when he pulled Izaya from that
fight. The sight of it strikes fleeting rage through Izaya. Why? He’s supposed
to be angry, hateful, not scared.
But no. He should also be afraid. He should feel guilty for abandoning him, for
relegating him to the ordinary, average students. Shizuo stutters and takes a
seat in the chair across Izaya’s desk. He speaks quietly.
“I –that was…I’m so sorry. I’m making things right.”
“Is that what you’re trying to do Shizu-chan?” He essentially abandons him,
leaves him without the only pleasure he’s ever wanted for himself and he thinks
he can apologize for it while continuing to deny him it? Izaya isn’t surprised
by Shizuo’s illogical thinking but maybe this is the chance he's been waiting
for. He leans forward, speaking gently as well and places a hand on Shizuo’s
forearm, Shizuo tenses. “You really want to help?”
Shizuo looks surprised and he nods slowly.
“I don’t know how many times I have to say it but if you want to ‘make things
right,’ if you want things to get better, then stop holding back. Just punish
me again and everything will be fixed.”
“Wait, what? Hold on-” he pulls away.
“That’s exactly what I thought. You’re weak now. You don’t have the guts to
solve our problems using real force so you waste my time and pretend it’s in my
best interest.”
“That’s not it at all. And I’m not apologizing for stopping, what are you-”
Shizuo looks frustrated and confused, like he missed a very important piece of
the conversations and was trying to catch up.
“I trusted you Sensei. I trusted you to follow through with your disciplinary
duties, I trusted you to do your job correctly. But here we are. You should be
sorry about that.”
“You have no idea what you're talking about,” Shizuo stands up and steps
closer, temper flaring.
“I don't? I don’t?” Izaya stands too and raises his voice. How dare he say such
a thing when Izaya’s never felt so betrayed since he was a child?
“I'm doing what's best for you,” Shizuo matches him in volume.
Izaya laughs loud and harsh. “You're doing what's best for me? What makes you
think you know anything about me you idiot?”
“Nothing! I don't have a clue how to deal with you!” Shizuo shouts, gesturing
angrily with his arms. “I don’t know a thing about you, that’s why I want you
to tell me. The only thing I do know for certain is what I was doing before
didn’t work at all.”
“It did work. It did work, you imbecile. I stayed out of your way for weeks
until–”
“Until you decided to get in trouble again on purpose. Usually fucking a lot of
things up in the process or risking your own well-being.”
“If that’s your problem, so be it. You want a signed agreement? I can do that.”
Izaya’s whole demeanor changes. His posture is inviting, expression friendly.
“Every couple of weeks, if I get real detention with you, I'll be the perfect
student. The best one you’ve ever had, no more dangerous stunts. How does that
sound?” Izaya smiles charmingly.
“I already said I’m not doing that again,” Shizuo growls, “the only thing left
is to talk.”
“I’d rather get expelled. Actually, I can’t think of anything sweeter right
now.”
“Stop lying to me, ok kid? You remember when I pulled you from that fight and
asked if you wanted to be thrown out of school? I saw the look on your face
that day, and you said no.”
That idiot. Who asked him to be so god damn observant at the worst moments? He
never noticed how horny Izaya got whenever he was punished all those times but
he notices shit like this?? Shizuo seems so sure of himself too, like there's
no doubt in his mind he is lying now. Izaya was weak when he said that, he was
at rock bottom so to speak. It held no validity. Izaya forces a laugh.
“I was lying,” he says, simply.
“Why would you lie about that?”
“I lie about everything.”
Shizuo tilts his head to the side and gives him another knowing look. “That’s
bullshit.”
“What does it matter?!” Izaya snaps, at the peak of his frustration. Shizuo is
usually dismissive, he's never the one to push Izaya’s own buttons. “I don’t
care what you believe to be true, none of it concerns you!”
“Why does it matter? It doesn’t concern me? It matters because all the crazy
shit you’ve been doing makes me worried sick, you idiot!” Shizuo rages back.
The force and resolve in which he says it does something to Izaya’s insides,
specifically making them plummet in… fear. His jaw drops. He tries to scoff but
it comes out more like a weak cough. The words slowly register in his mind
through the clammy shock.
“Worried?” he squeaks. “Worried?” he repeats, giggling hysterically. “Did you
just say you were worried about me?”
Shizuo looks endearingly confused. “Yes! I'm being serious-” he’s cut off by
Izaya’s sharp laughter.
Shizuo would presume to convince him that he worries, that he cares about him?
He would honestly have the nerve? It was one thing for Izaya to make cryptic
jabs about the notion of it. But hearing the words come out of Shizuo himself
is something entirely different. Something he won’t accept. He doesn’t mind
being used by others, he uses people all the time, it’s all part of the fun.
But it's false kindness like this that he can't tolerate. Izaya has made
mistakes before but where matters like this are concerned, he is no fool.
“Don't get the stories in your head mixed up. You hate me. Always have. Your
job was to teach me and punish me and you couldn't even do either of those
things." He laughs breathily but he hears how cruel his voice sounds, already
going way beyond the threshold of emotion he allows himself to display. “Now
you expect me to believe you’re worried about me?!” Why is Shizuo so
infuriating right now? The single second of fear he felt was drowned in anger.
He needs to get out of here. Before Shizuo can respond, Izaya makes it all the
way to the door.
“Izaya? Oi!” Shizuo, a tower of a man, doesn’t need to take as many steps and
easily stops him from sliding the door open. Izaya feels a pang of faint panic
when he doesn’t make it. “I meant what I-”
“I’m saving you the trouble of dealing with me. Let me out,” he says evenly,
feeling like he’s hanging on his last thread of sanity.
“I’m not going to do that,” Shizuo says. And it snaps.
“What, so you would have me be your prisoner here? Boy am I in fear for my
life. What do you think the police will think about you keeping me here against
my will? What if I was trying to escape because you tried to attack me?
Everyone knows your temper knows no bounds after all. All it would take is a
couple of bruises. You know what? I think I’m calling for help,” Izaya strides
to the window and pokes his head out as far as he can and yells at the top of
his lungs, “Help! Help! He’s finally snapped and trying to kill me!”
“Izaya!” Shizuo shouts, but he can’t get a word in, Izaya isn’t listening and
can’t really hear anything but his own voice and the sound of water filling his
ears as he shouts like a madman. He's acting irrational again, he knows. If he
actually feared for his life he’d just use his cellphone to call for help. But
all he wants is to be far away from here. Shizuo tears him away from the
windows carefully. “Calm down!”
Izaya recoils from him as if burned, “No! You don’t want to get anywhere near
me right now, Shizu-chan,” Izaya threatens with a brittle laugh. “I’d rather
get expelled or you fired than stand here and tolerate your deluded self-
important attempts to feel like a good person and make up for what a monster
you are. What does my face tell you now? I mean it. I’m leaving and you can’t
stop me this time. One way or another I’ll find a way.” Shizuo doesn't move an
inch as if to not startle him, like Izaya is some cornered animal. He feels
like one. He’s talking a mile a minute and can’t stop it, totally losing it in
front of Shizuo, who’s never seen him act like this before.
“What the fucks gotten into you, Izaya-kun?” Izaya rolls his eyes in disgust,
words are coming out and he’s distantly recognizing the feeling of recklessness
he had when he picked his fight with Tsukiyama. His words are unfiltered, he
only sees red.
“You think I don't know what you're doing? Do you think because I’m young, I'm
too stupid to know how much my parents are paying this school to keep me
enrolled? Who knows how high of a raise you must be getting for ‘selflessly’
keeping me in this school by any means. Am I honestly supposed to believe you
did it from the goodness of your heart? You? For me?” Izaya continues to
cackle, voice way too loud. After being accused of being duplicitous, Shizuo
erupts but the confused shock is still frozen on his face.
“How fucking dare you. That has nothing to do-” Izaya tunes him out completely
with a mocking grin, slowly inching his way towards the door again before
interrupting.
“Of course that’s why you’re doing this, I can see how desperate you are for
the extra cash too just based on the cheap shoes and clothes you wear. And
let’s not forget about your car,” he laughs venomously. “It’s pointless to
continue this farce. Nothing you say is going to change my mind, ok? I’m
leaving this room one way or another and you can’t stop me unless you want me
to try the window again, or worse, I’ll-”
“Then leave!” Shizuo cuts through loudly. The room goes silent and Izaya
realizes he’s out of breath. They stand there staring at each other with
contempt until Izaya works his feet to gather his things and goes. Shizuo
watches him the whole time, not moving an inch. His expression is one of
resignation. Izaya will not bring himself to say goodbye and he doesn’t stick
around to watch Shizuo clean up the mess of papers this time.
-----
Izaya vows to never go back to detention again. How could he possibly face
Shizuo again after such a disgraceful episode? How could he possible step foot
inside his classroom ever again? Rather than go home he spends the rest of the
night in the city with his humans. He doesn’t want time alone to think of what
happened or what Shizuo said. There are so many things he doesn’t want to think
about.
He justifies going to school the next day by thinking his final act of defiance
will be to walk out for ever at the end of the day. He got no sleep that night
and skipped his first few classes to catch up on it but he showed up all the
same. He catches up on sleep in Shizuo's class too and again, his professor
makes no comment during class. He made a vow, he was determined. But deep down
he knows he’ll never keep it. He can’t explain it but he can’t stand the
thought of never seeing Shizuo again as much as he loathes to admit it. Whether
it be because of the fun he’d miss or the excitement that Shizuo’s anger causes
him, he can’t let it end. Izaya threw terrible, personal insults straight to
Shizuo’s face but he didn’t get angry once, except when he accused him of being
a liar. Instead there was shock on his face and even maybe… pity, he despised
him for it. Everything was out of his control. Izaya wants to fantasize about
the old Shizuo, the man who loathed him and didn’t think twice before punishing
him but he refuses to do that too. He’s learned one thing at least, allowing
Shizuo to see his emotions is unacceptable. He knows how to make him soft, and
he knows how to make him angry. He’ll choose anger.
His final period comes and goes and to both their surprise, Izaya stays behind
for detention despite everything.
Shizuo is decent enough not to comment on it or on the crazy way Izaya reacted
before. Shizuo also doesn’t ask any more questions. At least not right away.
Izaya is calm now, deeply regretting ever having lost control yesterday.
Shizuo’s bad temperament must be contagious. However, during the first few
moments after it becomes clear Izaya will stay, they share a tense silence
before Shizuo takes the assignments to him and Izaya reiterates that he won’t
touch them.
"That's twice you've fallen asleep in my class Izaya, are you getting any sleep
at all? And you showed up late to school. I think we've established that you
shouldn't be fucking skipping anymore," Shizuo mutters to him. Izaya is no
longer surprised he's been keeping tabs on him.
"Right, I forgot you're worried about me," Izaya scoffs. "I think we've
established that I don't give a shit what you think I should do," he adds with
a baleful smirk.
Shizuo slams his fist on Izaya's desk, face grim with anger. Izaya gazes back
smugly. "You're digging a deeper and deeper hole for yourself Izaya and pretty
soon even I won't be able to get you out." Shizuo backs off and returns to his
desk. His words rattle in Izaya's head. It turns out he’s saving the real
questions for the last hour, and though Izaya is composed, he is more hostile,
and cruel than ever now. He still retains his mocking sarcastic attitude, of
course but is totally repellant to any kind of real talking.
It’s only when Shizuo presses on about Izaya’s problems does he act this way.
Otherwise it’s like Izaya is himself again with not a care in the world. Like a
flipped switch. Regardless, Izaya all but antagonizes Shizuo all day as much as
he can. Obviously his teacher has a hard time ignoring it but he must not mind
it that much since he refuses to do either back down or give into Izaya’s
wishes. Things become extremely volatile for them both. For the rest of the
week this continues.
The final breaking point comes at the end of the week, Friday. Though Izaya is
in control of himself, he’s heard enough of Shizuo’s sickening attempts to
reach him and decides to take a different approach to rile him up. They’ve been
going back and forth for a while now, Izaya with his flippant attitude and
Shizuo with his unrelenting questions. They still had an hour left and the
student was steadily losing his patience.
“Help me out Izaya, give me something. I’m not your enemy here, not anymore.”
Shizuo pushes. That's the last thing Izaya wanted to hear.
“You just really want me to say it out loud don’t you? Just to make me do it.
You want to know what my problem is? Truly?” He spits, stops his pacing and
strides up to Shizuo’s desk where he sits.
“Yes,” Shizuo responds cautiously.
“My problem is that I want you bend me over this desk,” he slams his hands on
the wooden surface and bends over it to get on Shizuo’s level, “and spank my
ass raw until I’m hard, and shaking, and ready to come at any given moment.”
His voice drops low and he’s bending down on his elbows, facing Shizuo with a
searing gaze. Shizuo leans back in his chair, his mouth parts and his eyes are
blown wide and unguarded.
Izaya straightens up and looks down on him, regards Shizuo’s reaction, and
poorly conceals an insolent giggle. Shizuo's initial shock passes and he shoots
out of his chair immediately.
"Ok out. Now," he rasps, and yanks Izaya towards the door.
“What-”
Shizuo ignores him and pushes him through the door, "detention is over today.
You're free to go. I expect you back here on Monday."
"Hey wait! Come on, seriously?” Shizuo slams the door shut. Izaya stands there
in front of the door, huffing in anger. He pounds on it, “My stuff is still in
there you moron!” Shizuo returns to drop his bag at his feet before shutting
the door again.
How dare he kick Izaya out like that, Izaya doesn’t get kicked out of places,
he leaves of his own accord. He wanted to leave anyway. Stupid Shizu-chan.
Izaya walks home reflecting upon the past week. He now knows what will get
Shizuo most riled up and he intends to fully exploit it. He smirks to himself
When he gets home, he’s greeted by his sisters immediately which never happens
unless they have news. They come running down the stairs when they hear him
walk through the door. “Iza-nii! Iza-nii! Guess who called us?? Mama and Papa,
they’re coming home tomorrow!”
Oh, Right. Izaya had hoped they’d never return this time. He remembers the
inevitable parent –principal meeting the following Monday and his mood dampens.
Based on what they decide to do with him he’ll either get to stay or get
transferred to another school again. Shizuo won’t be able to do anything about
that as much as he’d want to. So much for that pay raise of his.
“Didn’t you hear us, Iza-nii?” Mairu repeats. “They’re coming back.”
“Yeah, so? You know they’ll be too busy to spend time with you anyway. They’ll
also probably push back their flight an extra day to get some more work done.”
Mairu punches him in the stomach. She’s getting faster, but she’s still little
so Izaya flinches from surprise only. “Nn! You’re so mean! They’ll make time
for us, they always do.”
“Once every couple of weeks maybe,” Izaya comments drily while taking off his
shoes. What a terrible thing to come home to. He preferred thinking about
Shizuo’s stunned face and what he was gonna do to make him show it again.
Shizuo didn't give him a chance to see anything else before kicking him out.
“They said they were going to take us out for ice cream too when they get
back.”
Izaya shrugs. “Fine, listen to them and not me.” He walks past them into the
kitchen and digs through one of the cabinets. He doesn’t think of the
disappointment they will face nor does he care.
Mairu trails behind. “You’re just mad because they want to see us and they’re
making you move schools again,” she sing songs.
Izaya turns around sharply, already regretting not going straight to his room.
“What? What did they tell you?” He asks.
“They said you were a mess they had to clean up again,” Kururi replies with
probably the most words he's heard her say all week. Mairu finishes for her,
“they always say that when they're going to move you.”
Izaya shakes his head. “You both are liars. They don’t say that every time,” he
snaps at Mairu in particular.
Kururi gazes quietly at him. “They did this time.”
Izaya fumes silently at them. Mairu laughs and whispers into Kururi’s ear, “Uh
oh, he's mad now. We showed him huh, Kuru-nee?” before taking her hand and
pulling her upstairs. “Good luck Iza-nii!”
Then a quieter, “bye.”
He rolls his eyes and slams the cabinet shut. He won't stew over this. Just
because they said that didn't make things final. And even if they'd already
decided, he'd make them change their mind one way or another. He covers his
face and laughs despite himself. All week he’s been trying to get himself
expelled and now his parents might end up doing it for him.
Chapter End Notes
     It's finally finished I hope all of you are still here reading my
     story! Leave your thoughts, I'd love to hear them. Chapter 7 will not
     take as long as this one did, and I'm very excited to have that one
     finished. Don't forget to re-read chapter 5 if you want to!
***** Chapter 7 *****
Chapter Notes
     Hi guys, wow I said this wouldn't take much time and look at me.
     Sorry! I won't make any promises I can't keep anymore but I'll never
     let this story go, that you can take my word for! I'll add more here
     when I've gotten some rest. I'm posting this at like 3am lol Also
     I've been meaning to answer the rest of the comments for the last
     chapter but I haven't gotten to them yet. Yet!
     Please enjoy and let me know what you think!
See the end of the chapter for more notes
They arrive in a sleek black rental car that Saturday evening. He was alerted
to it by Mairu’s cheers and both of his sisters barreling through the hall
before running outside. His bedroom window faces the side of the house where a
driveway runs alongside. He looks down on them with a blank expression as his
mother and father step out. They’re wearing their usual dark business attire,
sluggish from their flight. They still look lively and attractive for their
age, Izaya was glad he inherited that from them at least but Izaya always
disliked how much he looked like his mother. He turns away when his sisters
come into view outside, right before they jump into their arms. His sisters
always forget how long the wait is. All the time spent longing and missing
their parents is forgiven once they're back. Izaya used to be that way too. But
that was before, before he decided to grow up. His sisters are still young but
they'll learn soon enough as well.
He keeps to himself in his room, knowing no one will disturb him. He prefers
when they’re not home, thankfully it’s not often that they are home. But when
they are, it’s harder for him to pretend they don’t exist. He tunes out the
voices and shuffling around the house by filling his head with music and the
tidings that come in some of these local forums. He doesn’t think they’re all
true, but he’s good at fact checking. Every day something new happens, and
every night, twice that much. It’s even better when he’s out there. What kind
of career could lend itself to doing that? He thinks ironically. He doesn’t
think he could bare slaving away most of his life indoors, working at firms or
companies or corporations.
He only leaves his room when his stomach grumbles. His parents are unloading
groceries onto the kitchen counter when he saunters down the stairs and walks
past them. They don’t notice him in their haste. His sisters might have, but
they’re clinging onto their parents like spider monkeys, filling them in on
everything they missed these past few weeks. He pulls on his boots and heads
out without a word.
The next morning, things are less fortunate. Izaya is about to leave the house
again in the early morning, ready to get the most out of his free time before
the pointless meeting he’ll have to suffer through tomorrow and also to clear
his head of his past week. He didn’t think he’d run into anyone this early so
his mother’s presence throws him off. She’s in the kitchen reading a newspaper
over the counter and making coffee. She's already showered and dressed in a
silk blouse and a gray pencil skirt. He can’t remember the last time he’s seen
her in pajamas. What made him stop was the cool stare being directed at him as
he slowed his pace.
“Mother,” Izaya greeted blandly, “good to have you and father back.” If it had
been his father he might not have said anything but his mother had a special
aversion to him that Izaya liked to exploit.
“You would think so after everything you did to force us back.” Izaya expected
that. He grins the smallest of grins.
“What do you mean?”
“I’m your mother, not one of your fools. We were on the verge of closing a deal
with another potential buyer and bound to stay longer when you nearly get
yourself expelled. You just couldn’t help it could you?” She studies his face
with disinterest, trailing over the slight discoloration that still lingers
under his eye. “I hope you’re happy,” she says and turns to pour the coffee
into a mug.
“I had no idea.” Izaya laughs. His dear mother still thinks he is vying for
their attention, how cute. He stopped trying that ages ago. Everything Izaya
does, he does for himself now. It just so happens that he gets in a lot of
trouble for it. Well, that may have been true until he met Shizuo. His
attention is the only thing that matters now.
“Of course you didn’t,” she agrees mockingly, sending a deliberately blank look
over the rim of her mug. He wasn't lying though. He only provoked Tsukiyama on
a reckless whim. But he doesn’t mind taking the credit for their inconvenience;
he gets so much joy from making their lives more complicated. His mother turns
her attention back to the newspaper on the counter and that marks the end of
their conversation. He thinks for a moment he might ask about tomorrow but he
holds his tongue and goes on his way.
Izaya had been having a good time with Shizuo, he realizes with discomfort. His
parents have only been back two days but it has made his mood darken so much,
it makes his hell week with Shizuo seem like a vacation. What does that say
about him? It should be the other way around. At least with his own parents,
Izaya has no illusions about how much they care, but with Shizuo… he’s not sure
anymore, and he's not fond of uncertainty. There’s a possibility Shizuo is
telling the truth, sure, and he’s not known to have near enough tact to be a
good liar, but he’ll die before he trusts that stupid blond bastard.
He treats himself to sushi and walks around town, meets people he’s talked to
online, except he’s the only one that sees them. Often times he likes to match
those people up with themselves, it makes for a really entertaining show. But
he reserves that for another time because he’s too distracted. He’s been
avoiding Shinra ever since they last saw each other too, not wanting to be
asked ‘how things went’ and have to think up some clever thing to say. The sky
blackens but the glow of the city remains ever so bright.
A part of him wonders if he went too far with his recent dig into Shizuo. He
did not enjoy getting thrown out of the room like that either. It reminded him
of the weeks when Shizuo met his efforts with cold indifference and locked
classroom doors. But then again, that was not remotely on par with the line he
crossed when Shizuo told him he was worried for him. He still clenches his
fists in shame whenever he remembers how he disgraced himself. If that little
display wasn't enough for Shizuo get rid of him, he could do anything, and
Shizuo would still expect him back the next day and the one after that.
Izaya pictures it again, Shizuo’s shocked, almost innocent expression when
Izaya admitted he wanted Shizuo to spank him over his desk. There’s no way he
didn’t know already but maybe he never thought Izaya would actually say it out
loud. I should have said ‘until I come all over your assignments,’ Izaya
giggles to himself at the thought. Would that have made his reaction more
scandalized or angry? He couldn’t tell much from his reaction to begin with but
he hoped to see more.
It’s the solution he's been searching for. He left Shizuo so flustered with
little confession, it won’t be hard to exploit it again. Izaya’s disgraceful
outburst will be overshadowed and forgotten, and he won't have to worry about
Shizuo insisting on pretending to care about him because he’ll be too busy
warding off Izaya’s inappropriate comments and information. Shizuo won’t punish
him anymore, fine. Izaya will just have to make due with seeing Shizuo react
with shock and discomfort instead.
When he comes back home, he’s thankful to find it quiet and free of his
parents. Izaya goes about his business, and even does some homework. He doesn’t
stop thinking about his teacher. When has he ever been able to stop? If he
could only think of all the times he made Shizuo flustered, he’d stay happy but
his mind strays back to the unpleasant memories too. His soft gaze, his stupid
lies, and his relentless attempts to trick Izaya into saying something too
personal, all come to mind. Izaya’s already fallen for the trick twice already.
He thinks about this meeting too. He can’t know for sure what the outcome
tomorrow will be but if his parents do decide to take him out...no, he’d rather
not think about it.
----
The appointment is set for the following day after school. His parents got a
hold of him before he left and warned him not to mess anything up and to follow
their lead. They also tell him he has to come home with them after the meeting
so as not to look strange. They don’t bother telling him what they expect to
get from this meeting and he doesn’t ask. To them, he’s not worth sharing that
information with. He wouldn’t dare ask them to let him stay either because they
might definitely move him out of spite for causing so much trouble.
So instead, Izaya willfully thinks nothing of this meeting except for how
boring and insignificant it’ll be. He enjoys class with Shizuo instead.
Ah, Shizuo. He spends the entire class period never meeting Izaya’s eyes, but
one single time. He doesn’t even look anywhere in his direction which is really
something, considering Izaya is seated near the middle row, and closer to the
front of the room than the back. He finds it so amusing that he can’t stop
grinning the whole time.
Whenever Shizuo used to ignore him, he never had qualms about landing his gaze
on Izaya briefly, and then on another student. He often looked past him like he
didn't exist. That always angered Izaya the most; he shouldn't have been
looking at him like any other student. Izaya was like no one else. But now? It
is clear Shizuo is painfully aware of Izaya’s presence by the stiffness of his
shoulders and back, and his refusal to look at a whole half of his classroom
during lecture.
If only I had detention with you today, Shizu-chan, he thinks. I’d have so much
fun with you again. He’s confident he could make him blush if given the
opportunity. But he was told that he wouldn't be required in detention today.
Izaya raises his hand several times to answer questions and Shizuo never so
much as turns in his direction, even when Izaya is the only one volunteering.
Shizuo picks on someone else to answer it. When his raised hand goes ignored
for over 5 minutes, Izaya finally speaks aloud, “Excuse me! Shizu-chan, I’ve
been holding my hand out forever, I have a question about–”
“Questions can be asked at the end of class!” Shizuo whirled on him and
bellowed suddenly. His reaction was so abrupt that Izaya’s classmates nearly
jumped out of their seats, one accidentally knocked their notes off their desk
from the scare.
“What?” He asks incredulously. “But other–”
“No more questions until after class. That goes for all of you,” Shizuo directs
to the whole room in a tone with no room for argument. Izaya finds it so
comical he wishes he could have recorded it. The thought starts a whole string
of possibilities for the future.
I better not get moved to some other school, he thinks. No turn of events has
ever been sweeter for me. The final bell rings and all the students are
dismissed. Izaya waits to be the last to leave so he can tease his professor
about getting out of detention today but it strikes him oddly that Shizuo is
packing his things too. He never does that right after class.
“So about that question I had,” Izaya grins cheekily at him as he approaches.
“Bite me.”
Izaya’s grin widens. He has no intention of following that command but he takes
notice again of Shizuo’s haste to leave. “Have somewhere to be Shizu-chan?”
“It's Sensei,” he corrects shortly, making it a point of ignoring him as he
cleans up his desk. “And I’m going to be at your meeting.”
The words catch up to him slowly. Wait… No. His world shrinks down to a narrow
tunnel. Not again… not so soon. He shakes his head.
“No, you can’t. You have no right to be there,” Izaya protests. That finally
makes Shizuo pause and he looks at Izaya sternly, but briefly.
“I asked Akirawa-san weeks in advance to be present for your meeting and he’s
agreed I should be there. So…I actually do.” He continues stacking up the
remaining folders and shoving them into his worn bag.
“I don’t want you to!” Shizuo looks at him differently this time, studying him
carefully.
“It’s going to be fine, alright? It’ll be like I’m not even there.”
“Don’t tell me anything is going to be ‘fine,’ do you take me for a blubbering
child? You are not going.” It will ruin everything.
“Believe me, I don’t.” He can tell Shizuo was holding back a sneer. “And yes, I
am. I'm getting this over with. Are you coming or not?”
“You just don't get it, do you? I’m not going! Not if you’re there. So you
better make a choice between the two of us. I don’t care either way. They can
kick me out of here and expel me for all I c–” his voice cuts off and Shizuo
watches him with a frown, his bag forgotten.
Why am I wasting my breath? I’ve been saying the same thing for the past two
weeks, if I was going to get myself kicked out, I would have gotten it done
already. The thought falls on him like a ton of bricks. It's true. How many
times had he repeated this very same threat? Why say these things to Shizuo if
not because he wants to be stopped? He's suddenly angry and disappointed with
himself all at once.
He takes his leave, fully prepared to endure this meeting until it's finally
all over. His parents will choose to send him somewhere else, why beat around
the bush? And he won’t need to keep up this song and dance any longer. He would
end it himself to save the trouble but… he just can’t.
Shizuo seems to misinterpret his silence. He steps swiftly around the desk,
grabs Izaya’s shoulder before he gets far and leans down to his level. “Listen.
It'll be ok,” he repeats with a gentle sort of ferocity. “Please. Don't miss
this meeting. Please don’t.” Shizuo has no right to look this scared. Do you
want your new car that badly? he thinks bitterly. When Izaya can’t look at him
anymore he shrugs his hand off and leaves.
His parents are already waiting for him in the office, ever the timely people
they are. Shizuo arrives shortly after him but he’s gone back to pretending
he’s not there. There are three chairs set before the principal's desk and
Izaya takes the one on the far right. Akirawa introduces Shizuo and they all
shake hands and exchange polite greetings. Izaya can’t help but notice how
Shizuo is the taller than even his own father, though just by a few inches. He
starts picking his nails and tries to think of anyone he knows that’s as tall.
“Thank you both for taking the time to meet with us. Please sit,” the principal
says. They all sit, his mother beside him, his father beside her, and Shizuo
across from them in a chair against the wall by Akirawa’s left.
“As you already know, for quite some time your son has been displaying very
troubling behavior here at Raira. His most recent offense was physically
engaging with another student on school grounds and–”
“He means fighting,” Izaya clarifies. Everyone glares at him.
“Be quite,” his mother rebukes under her breath.
The principal continues, frowning at Izaya. “But that's not all of it I'm
afraid. That was only after a culmination of other behaviors. He has damaged
school property, has been caught using illicit substances, and stealing test
answers as well.”
“Oh,” his mother feigns a horrified sound and puts a hand over her chest.
“I’ve suspended both Izaya and the other boy for this fighting. However as it
turned out in this particular case, Izaya-san’s motivations were more well-
meaning. We later discovered he was defending a peer who was being harassed by
this other boy and he was attacked for his efforts. That was the only reason
your son was not expelled that very same day.”
Izaya bites his tongue to prevent himself from saying something stupid. Like he
needs to be reminded of the debt he owes Shizuo for that stupid lie. He
glimpses him sitting against the wall. He's wearing his dress jacket, something
he hardly does in class and his shirt is a darker cool color. It makes him look
more professional, no doubt about it. He hasn’t said a word yet and Izaya
wonders if he'll stay quiet the whole time.
“But that doesn’t erase his numerous and increasingly severe offenses. We are
determined to take a different approach to stopping this but the issue of his
disregard for authority poses many concerns to us all at Raira Academy and we
hope you can do your part in assisting us in the home.”
“We are more aware and more appalled by Izaya’s actions more than anyone,
especially his recent act of violence. We have been dealing with this for many
years, long before we brought him here, actually. This is the fourth school
we’ve tried,” said his father. “Or the fifth? Frankly, I haven’t the vaguest
idea what else we can do with him at home.”
“I agree,” his mother adds. “You must believe we’ve tried everything. He didn’t
last a week in boot camp, nor in therapy, and extracurricular activities were a
disaster on their own. He’s done unseemly things.”
“I understand you must be very overwhelmed by this Orihara-san–”
“Please, call me Kyouko.”
“Kyouko-san, there’s no doubt you and your husband are very involved with your
son, but I am sure there is still more you can do. I was very troubled by your
prolonged absence after Izaya-san’s suspension. You both were out of the
country for almost a month, correct? I must ask, are these trips very
frequent?”
“Don’t think I’ll of us, Akirawa-san. We work tirelessly for the benefit of our
family and these business trips are a necessity,” his father Shouto explains
mild-mannered.
“Fortunately, these trips are rare. It is always painful to leave our children
for too long,” his mother answers amicably. Izaya suppresses a groan. Did the
two of them rehearse this?
“I’m relieved to hear that. It will be difficult for us to help your son if we
cannot take everything into consideration. Your cooperation is of paramount
importance. For the sake of understanding more,” the principal folds his hands,
“could you please tell me what Izaya’s behavior at home has been like this past
year? Is he getting along with you both and his sisters?”
“Please tell mother, since I don't know the answer myself,” Izaya pleads
mockingly.
“Izaya-san, that's quite enough,” Akirawa scolds irritated. “Let me remind you,
you are still on thin ice.” Izaya is still well aware.
His mother goes on as if Izaya never spoke. “If only I could say. I admit we
work long, hard hours, but it’s only to give our children good lives and we
also salvage our time with them.” All lies, Izaya thinks, but he expects
nothing less. They would have to be stupid to tell the truth. “However, we
can't begin to understand where all his behavior is coming from. He avoids us,
even his own little sisters, and disappears for hours on end wandering around
the heart of the city, isn’t that right Izaya-kun?”
She turns to him expectantly. Izaya meets her eyes with a cold, blank stare but
says nothing. She sighs again through her nose with irritating patience. “See?
God knows what he’s getting himself into out there. We're so worried he might
get sucked into illegal activities but he won't listen. It hurts me so much to
see him so distant.”
Izaya can't exactly out his parents for the cold-blooded liars so he laughs
boisterously instead. His mother side-eyes him and Akirawa purses his lips.
“Izaya-san, your parents worry about your safety and you find that funny? Try
to imagine things from their perspective and you will see it’s no laughing
matter. You want to improve yourself for your family don't you?”
Izaya gives him a look as contemptuous as he dares. There should be no harm in
telling the old man what a daft, incompetent fool he is if he’s going to be
expelled anyway but Shizuo speaks before he gets the chance.
“I’m positive he’s willing to improve, Akirawa-san. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have
kept coming back to detention,” he says curtly. Offended, Izaya glares at him
instead. How dare he even say such a thing out loud? I knew you were just a
lackey all along.
Shizuo doesn’t seem to notice him though. He’s frowning fiercely down at
Akirawa’s desk, deep in thought, and shifting around in his seat. The principal
doesn’t notice his expression and takes his response with a satisfied nod.
“Forgive me, it’s not my place to reprimand your son in your presence,” the
older man says to Shouto. His father waves a hand in a reassuring manner.
“Please, think nothing of it. You see what we have to deal with, you may have
better luck.”
“That is my hope as well. I know that now, Izaya might be closed off but can
you remember anything that might have happened to him around the time when all
this unruliness first began?”
“Truthfully, we don’t,” Kyouko says regretfully. “And we also have our own
grievances. We’ve searched far and wide for a place that could hold our son.
Most schools won’t take him and he hasn’t lasted longer than a semester most
times.” She’s right about that; Izaya never lasts in one school. He sees to it.
Whether it takes a month or half a year, his parents always lose their patience
with him and simply put him somewhere fresh and new like they can reset him and
buy more time until the next unavoidable problem he drags them into. His mother
continues.
“We brought him here thinking this school knew how to handle that kind of
behavior. We’d heard of your harsher methods for dealing with his sort and
hoped it would be enough to bring some sense back to him but it seems we
overestimated the quality of this institution. How could you let him reach this
point? Our son is getting into fights and using drugs now like some delinquent?
It’s unheard of!”
And there it is, what he’s been waiting for. Izaya stops himself from rolling
his eyes at the melodrama. Akirawa scrambles to adjust to the new direction the
conversation takes, helpless against the shift of blame. Now he’s the one that
has to answer for Izaya’s behavior instead of his parents. Izaya would be
amused but this doesn’t seem funny to him right now. He might enjoy it more if
Shizuo Heiwajima weren’t there in the room scrutinizing all three of them at
this very moment. Izaya will not look at him again.
“I understand perfectly, Kyouko-san.”
“Do you?”
“I can only imagine the hardships that come with a wayward child. We are doing
the best we can, difficult as he can be, and Heiwajima-san, one of our best
teachers, will be overseeing his after-school detention.”
“By detention you mean your ‘old’ way of disciplining him?” She smiles
graciously. “As much as we are eager for any solution, it doesn’t seem that
approach is quite as effective anymore or else we needn’t be here. In fact,
based on the direction Izaya is going, it seems we’ll be here again. You must
understand our disillusionment after having contributed so much to this
school?”
She is really laying it on thick. It’s obvious now what’s going to happen. If
Izaya wanted to fight it, he should have done so before they came here but it
was too late now. He will need to start getting used to the fact that he won’t
see Shizuo anymore. Not every day at least. Will it be that terrible? He really
doesn’t know. Shizuo will never punish him again, has humiliated him countless
times, and told disgusting lies to him, but he still doesn’t want to leave.
While the principal responds with objections and reassurances, Izaya’s gaze is
unwittingly pulled to his teacher and finds bright brown eyes already focused
on him. He’s frowning lightly, his eyes are wrought with confusion and anger.
Anger, but not towards me, he can see that now. There’s less and less of that
in Shizuo’s eyes for him lately. Izaya hates it, hates it even more that he had
to meet his parents. Izaya glares back to show his disdain for him being here,
but secretly, he hides away little details of Shizuo’s face to memory before
looking away.
“Things were going so well for Izaya here, I’ll admit. This is the longest he’s
behaved at all of his schools, that is also true, but his behavior is only
getting worse. I’m not sure if Raira Academy is really the right fit after all
that’s happened.”
“Its fine, Izaya interjects sharply. He’s annoyed by his mother's blatant
falseness and Shizuo’s blatant stupid worry.
“Don’t interrupt us, Izaya,” his father warns him.
“Or else what?” He fires back, ready to get out of his chair.
His mother puts a hand on her husband’s arm and smiles politely at the
principal. “Is there any way we can have this talk without him in the room?
Otherwise, I’m afraid we’ll be here all day.” Izaya does roll his eyes this
time and groans.
Shizuo clears his throat carefully and looks at his parents. “Actually, I think
its best if he is present for this since it directly concerns him.”
Oh, that’s the voice he uses when he’s hanging by a thread of control. He’s
heard it often enough to know. But why is he angry now?. The stubborn urge to
take a peek at him again wins out. Shizuo isn’t looking at him anymore. He’s
forcing a neutral expression, and his hands are clutching the armrests of his
chair in a white-knuckled grip.
Hearing anyone disagree with his parents is a victory in his mind but it’s
unnerving to hear those words come from Shizuo. Maybe he’s angry because he has
to force himself to defend the ‘flea’. That has to be it. His mother tenses
slightly at his rough voice and focuses her gaze on him as if she finally
realized he was there.
“Heiwajima-san,” she tries the name out. “You’re the teacher who proposes to
keep Izaya-kun after school, then?” Izaya doesn't know why he feels himself
tense. Shizuo gives a nod and a yes.
“I am wondering. You’ve dealt with him before for his infractions, but why
haven’t you been successful? I had heard promising things about you.” Like that
Shizuo was feared for his terrifying demeanor and the way he punished his
students. Izaya laughed at what they said before he transferred here, it only
keyed him up further to face the challenge. Now there isn’t any.
“Your son…” Shizuo begins awkwardly, “he's resistant to every effort we’ve made
to discipline him as you probably guessed. Even my own …method has had no
effect on him,” he takes her bluntness with stride but his voice is still a
little strained for a different reason. Izaya leans back in his chair and
thinks about how resistant he's been to Shizuo’s punishments. It's good to know
that tiny bit of leverage isn't totally lost on him, even if it won’t last much
longer.
“Then what is your plan to keep him in line if your method doesn't work and
never did?” She asks skeptically and Izaya bristles again. He is at the height
of his patience with everyone talking about him like he's not there, especially
his mother. Almost as if he heard his thoughts, Shizuo glances at Izaya before
answering.
“Orihara-san defies most teachers’ commands and often cuts classes and
detentions but rarely with me. Of that, I can assure you. This past week in
detention can speak to that. He’s attended every single one and will continue
to. While he does, I will see to it myself that he uses his time honestly and
productively so we can steer him back on the right path. I accept full
responsibility for the escalation of his behavior. It should have never reached
this point. I was tasked with disciplining him but I failed, and for that, I
deeply apologize to the three of you,” he bows his head solemnly and is
answered by heavy silence. Izaya balks at him while his parents exchange a
look.
Three of–? Huh?!
“...Thank you.” Kyouko says, too taken aback to put any of her usual charm into
her voice. Izaya just continues to stare dumbly at him.
“Heiwajima-san is correct. Ever since Izaya-san’s suspension has been lifted,
there have been no incidents. There is no need fear while your son is under his
care. He is relentless as he is principled,” the principal adds, looking
pleased with himself. “We are fully prepared to take the right steps to prevent
further misbehavior. We guarantee it.”
“And what of his grades? They're the worse than ever,” his father counters,
still not convinced. “Heiwajima-san, what you propose sounds great, but you
can't mean to be his tutor on top of all that. Even if you could, you can’t
help him with all his other failing subjects. You even mentioned he stole test
answers,” he reminds Akirawa.
Shizuo responds before Izaya has a chance to recover from the first shock. “I
don't believe he truly did that for those test answers. He’s prone to do things
that gain a lot of attention. And his grades, well, they are bad now yes,
but... Orihara-san has so much potential. He could easily bounce back if he
really wanted to and there’s enough time before this semester ends.
He has a lot of problems with authority, that much is obvious, but not with
schoolwork. He’s one of the brightest, most intelligent students I’ve ever
encountered as a teacher. Many times, he goes weeks without turning in a single
graded assignment or even touching a textbook but when the time came for his
exams, he passed with better grades than anyone else in my class. That was only
when he felt like demonstrating his capabilities though. Orihara-san has all
the wits a person his age could hope to have for but his success entirely
depends on his own willingness to put in the effort and take his school work
seriously. I wholeheartedly believe he deserves another chance.”
He goes on and on and on to his parents, staring fixedly at them, not Izaya,
who is frowning in horror. He belatedly remembers to close his mouth. Shizuo
being on his side… defending him, and praising him is unbelievable, surreal
even. Izaya was sure hell would freeze over before something like this ever
happened. His parents must be thinking Shizuo mistook their son for another boy
entirely. Most teachers and principals are jumping with joy when his parents
come to take him away. Their shocked silence seems to fuel Shizuo’s simmering
anger further but he’s doing a serviceable job of hiding it.
“Please hear us. Your son is in good hands here at Raira,” Akirawa insists for
the billionth time. “Heiwajima-san is determined to put all his efforts into
correcting your son.”
Izaya openly studies his parents’ expression. He can see them thinking, maybe
re-thinking. Putting Izaya in the hands of a school that's this desperate to
keep him could prove less work than moving him and starting anew. Is it relief
he’s feeling right now? His mother frowns at him suspiciously as if he had some
part in this. Whatever you're thinking, you’re not even close.
“Izaya has tolerated this school much longer than the others,” Kyouko says
reluctantly as she turns to his father. He agrees.
“He is disobedient to a fault, so it's surprising that you say he attends every
one of your after-school sessions,” his father muses with intrigue. “How can
you know he won't act out again?” He asks the principal and Shizuo both. It's
Shizuo who answers first.
“He won't. It's all under control.”
It's said with so much blunt certainty that Izaya’s mind begins to race.
Shizuo goes suddenly silent again and this time he focuses his gaze on the
other end of the room, goes back to frowning at Akirawa’s desk. Father weighs
his response and eventually shrugs. “If you guarantee it… no one's ever
guaranteed us before, have they Kyouko?”
“Never,” she answers him, looking at the principal, “no one dared promise such
a thing when it concerned our Izaya-kun,” she smiles wanly. “I appreciate your
persistence for keeping our son here. It speaks to your resolve for helping
him.”
“Of course, Kyouko-san. It is my job to help students, all of them, but I thank
you all the same.” Izaya has to resist the urge to throw up in his mouth.
“There is one more thing I would like to discuss in case you do decide to allow
your son to stay enrolled,” the principal begins. “It has been increasingly
difficult getting in touch with you both. Most of our attempts to communicate
with you go unanswered which, by itself, is troubling. I would like a better
way of reaching you, perhaps if possible, the extensions to your offices. We
should stay in close contact so you may be updated on your son's progress.”
“How generous you are,” Shouto chuckles lightly. “Are you sure that's
necessary? You said yourself he will be in very capable hands.”
Kyouko smiles at that. “I think my husband has already been swayed in your
favor, Akirawa-san.
If we decide to keep Izaya here, we would much prefer those lines only be used
in case of emergencies. Please understand that our work makes it very hard to
attend to matters like these. We are perfectly willing to hand you the reins if
it means the best thing for Izaya. There would be no need to consult with us,”
Shizuo’s eyebrows pinch together angrily and his mouth twists in an effort to
stay passive. Izaya was wrong. There is no relief in this, not when Shizuo is
here witnessing everything. His anger isn't making any sense.
“I am humbled by your trust in us, thank you both for coming.”
Shizuo slowly stands up. “Please excuse me, I have to use the bathroom,” he
says stiffly. He doesn’t wait for a response and exits the room in long
strides. Izaya turns in his seat and watches him go with overwhelming
bewilderment. No way. There’s no way he’s that angry. Maybe annoyed, but not
furious. Why?
“I need to go to the bathroom too, really, really badly,” he says to the
principal.
“You absolutely will not move from that chair until this meeting is over,
Izaya-san,” the principal says sternly. Izaya deflates.
“As I was saying,” his mother picks the conversation back up without sparing a
glance at either Izaya or his professor, “we don’t know what’s happening to our
son, but if you and that Heiwajima-san insist that you will have him under
control, then we may be so inclined to reconsider our previous decision. I
think it’s–” talk, talk, talk, ughh
Izaya hates hearing her unwavering voice, more so now that Shizuo isn’t here to
distract him. When she speaks, it's always even, measured, and in the purest
sense, professional. It’s so boring, and so… lifeless. Father is the same way,
only he takes slightly more pleasure in conversation. He must not have anything
further to say though because he just sits there tapping his finger idly on his
armrest and checking the clock on the wall every few minutes or so. If he’s
bored, that makes two of them. This meeting has gone on too long.
Shizuo returns in under ten minutes looking a little worse for wear. No one
comments on it or even seems to notice, except for Izaya, who always notices
everything about him. Yet, he can't begin to comprehend what he's seeing.
Nothing about Shizuo is making sense today. Or all week for that matter.
His mother is a truly annoying woman but she's done nothing against Shizuo. And
even he finds her irritating, there's no way it could be enough to put this
expression on Shizuo’s face. She and the principal discuss the continuation of
their support to the school and eventually give over their extensions in the
case of dire emergencies. But he's only paying attention to what they're saying
to gage Shizuo’s reactions to them. He sits there stiff as a board with his
fists clenched tightly.
Then all of a sudden, Shizuo’s eyes find his and they share a silent
conversation. He looks perplexed, curious, even saddened. Izaya doesn't know
what his own expression might tell. He feels an odd sensation as they stare at
each other, like something in his chest unfurled and started crawling around
inside him frantically. It's unsettling but as much as he wants it gone, he’s
helpless and naked under him. Shizuo looks away first.
“Now, I'm certain Heiwajima-san will do his part but Izaya-san –are you
listening? You have to meet us halfway. I'll remind you your detentions are
still mandatory and if you fail to comply or commit any more offenses you will
be removed from our school. Do you accept these terms?”
“I guess I have no choice but to accept, Akirawa-Sensei,” he says with a colder
courtesy than his parents. You had a choice and you just made it.
The meeting comes to a close as Izaya’s parents reach a final agreement with
the principal. Akirawa seems more than satisfied with the results but Shizuo
looks grim and joyless. All Izaya can think about is how glad he is to be done
with this. They stand and shake hands but Izaya slings his bag over his
shoulder and starts to leave.
“Thank your principal for his kindness, Izaya,” Kyouko protests.
“I already have,” Izaya says, not stopping. The old man can tolerate his
insolence if he wants his parents’ money so bad. He reaches the door but Shizuo
calls out to him and he turns around. Shizuo is standing by the chair Izaya sat
in while his parents apologize to the principal on his behalf. Shizuo isn’t
paying them any mind though, and his eyes are locked on Izaya’s, seeing him
only, seeing all the things Izaya doesn’t want him to.
“You get today off. I'll expect you back tomorrow.”
Izaya turns away and walks out. He waits outside by his parents’ car. Once his
parents are out of the building it’s like they can’t leave fast enough. They
seem relieved to finally be done with this chore. The three of them ride home
mostly in silence; his parents occasionally comment about the meeting with each
other until his mother speaks up to Izaya.
“Since we were forced to leave unfinished business back in China, we're going
to go back in two days’ time. We don't know for how long yet but it shouldn't
be more than two weeks. Let the girls know.”
“They're your kids not mine. You tell them.” They promised the principal they
wouldn't be going on more trips any time soon but their word is worth less than
dirt.
His father huffs impatiently. “This again? Do you still need to make everything
so difficult? You're almost a grown man.”
“I’m sorry no one ever told you having kids meant having to speak to them,
really,” Izaya says flatly, scrolling through forums on his phone. He’s always
refused. He never asked to be born to these people but he can at least refuse
to raise their children for them. He won’t be dragged into another mess.
His mother shakes her head as she types a message on her phone. “Forget it
Shouto. I shouldn’t have asked, knowing how he is.”
Shouto shakes his head with disapproval and speeds the car a little faster.
Izaya’s presence is as much a bane to them as they are to him. The small
semblance of peace Izaya felt earlier is gone now thanks to this news. He’s
happy with them gone but his little sisters won’t be. He was never good at
offering comfort.
---
It’s evident within the first few minutes of class that things are different.
Izaya didn’t say a word to Shizuo and neither did he. Izaya stares at him,
replaying the events of their meeting over and over again. Detention after that
is awkward too at first. He stays in his seat while everyone shuffles out. Kida
tells him to hang on, still believing that Izaya’s been getting beat with a
paddle all week. I wish.
Once they’re alone, Izaya continues to stare. The man himself pays him no mind
as he calmly flips through papers, writing this or that on them, before moving
onto the next one. Izaya can't forget the way he begged Izaya to go to the
meeting, his confused reaction to his parents, the empathic look he sent him
towards the end, the one that said I understand. Now he isn’t doing anything or
asking questions.
“Why did you say all those things about me?” Izaya blurts.
“Because it was the truth,” Shizuo answers gruffly. Izaya can't argue with
that, but…
“But you hate me.”
Shizuo seems offended by that. He glares, “I don't hate you.”
“Why not?” Izaya asks defensively. Shizuo is starting to get annoyed again.
Izaya likes that but he wants answers first.
“Maybe I strongly dislike you, but that’s not hate.”
“You despised me and with good reason after some of the things I’ve done. No
one asked you to say all of that for me,” or lie for me, or apologize to me, or
doanyof this.
“Look,” Shizuo takes his glasses off and rubs his eyes. “As many times as I've
wanted to punch your annoying face in, you're still my student first, and pest
second. I can't hate you. And even if I did, I can't just give up on you. I
want to help you.”
Izaya vehemently ignores that last part. “Sure,” he says plainly, not at all
satisfied with that answer. He's seen anger and hatred in his eyes before, all
for him, but no longer. It all changed, even more so now after the meeting.
Izaya’s not blind, he can tell. Shizu-chan thinks he’s a normal teacher now.
Izaya gets up and stands in front of Shizuo’s desk.
“Well, what did you think about them then? Spit it out,” Izaya demands
impatiently. He has to know.
Shizuo’s irritation returns but he puts his marker down and pauses, staring
blankly at his work. Izaya is about to repeat himself when he says, “I honestly
thought you were just a spoiled, entitled brat but… this was…” he trails off
with a strained expression.
“More pathetic than you expected, huh?” Izaya asks sardonically.
“Shut up!” Shizuo snaps viscously. “Don't talk about yourself like that. And I
was going to say different.”
“Well it is pathetic isn't it? It's the classic ‘I wasn't hugged enough as a
kid’ sob story. You have me all figured out now, don't you?” Izaya spits. He’s
still angry Shizuo inserted himself in their meeting. I don't care about them,
idiot. You don’t know anything.
“No! I don’t, and I would never pretend to. It's not so simple Izaya-kun.
Nobody's life is,” he says, looking pained, but resolute.
Izaya sucks his teeth but he has nothing to say to that. Shizuo’s changed so
much that he’s hardly recognizable right now. He should provoke him again like
he did before, but he's too full of questions and can't stop talking. “Did they
really make you that angry?” He asks quietly.
“Yes.” Shizuo’s expression sours.
“Why?”
“You know why Izaya! Do you know how hard it was being civil with those
fucking–” he stops, remembering himself. “They're terrible people and terrible
parents.”
“You can't know that from one meeting.”
“Yes, I can, and it doesn’t take a genius to know either… Akirawa-san had to be
playing dumb or something. I never thought…”
“Of course he's playing dumb. He’s in it for the money. And you helped him.
You’ve got me ‘all under control’ isn’t that right? You did your part and soon
you get to enjoy your share of the cut.”
“Don't lump me in with that bullshit! I only said that because it's what they
wanted to hear but I don't care about money or cars or clothes, got it? I never
even knew what his motives were until now. It's sickening,” he says
disheartened. Truthfully, Izaya didn't think that about Shizuo anymore but he
wanted to see his reaction.
Shizuo looks up at him again, anger gone, “they're never home are they?”
“I'm not telling you anything about them.”
Shizuo just nods like he expected that. “I heard enough from their own mouths.
You don't deserve that Izaya-kun.”
“Pointing out what we deserve and what we don't is a fool's errand, Shizu-chan.
But I already knew you were a fool,” he folds his arms nonchalantly but looks
away. Izaya is starting to feel immensely more uncomfortable the longer they
stay on this topic. He shouldn't care what Shizuo thinks of him; if he were
pushing anything but this noble, earnest, bullcrap, it would be easier…
Shizuo scowls at the barb but remains calmer than stillwater when he answers.
“Fool or not, everyone needs to be loved and taken care of.”
The statement makes Izaya’s blood boil with rage and his skin flush hot. What
does a monster know about love? He wants to shout, but he holds his tongue.
He’s done showing his emotions to this man. He can’t hear any more of this
talk, it will tear him apart. “I want to leave early today,” he says, still
looking elsewhere.
“You know I can’t let you do that,” Shizuo says softly.
The softness makes him angrier. “What if I do one of these stupid papers, will
that be enough to satisfy you??” He yanks out an assignment from the large
folder set aside for him on Shizuo's desk and shakes it around irreverently.
Shizuo thinks about it for a moment. “Yes, that works. I’m going to make sure
you actually did it though,” he sends him a pointed look.
Izaya rolls his eyes so hard they might fall out and gets started. It’s hasty
work but he gets it all done, tallying the correct answers, scribbling the
percentage on the corner of the page, and slamming it on Shizuo’s current
paperwork. He turns to leave without dismissal but Shizuo’s hand reaches out
and grasps his wrist, stopping him in his tracks. Izaya’s eyes widen and he
looks down at his hand and then at Shizuo. But he's not even looking at him;
his eyes are down, quickly skimming the paper front and back.
His hold is gentle, inescapable, but gentle. Izaya’s breath got caught in his
throat. It’s nothing like the bruising iron grip he uses when he's angry or
annoyed. Once Shizuo is done, let's go and looks up.
“Thank you. You’re all good to go,” his voice is calm and he looks almost…
friendly. There's no trace of animosity or even annoyance on his face. Izaya’s
brain will short circuit if he doesn’t get the hell out of here. He’d even
forgotten Shizuo had already let go of his wrist and he’s just been holding his
arm out like a moron. He snaps it back and leaves, rubbing away the prickles on
his wrist.
Izaya stomps quickly to the bathroom, heart pounding way too hard. He tries to
get a hold of himself once inside. He remembers it clearly. That large
destructive hand held his wrist firmly but held none of the brutish force he
was used to. It was such a harmless, innocent gesture, it threw him off. It was
simply to keep Izaya from leaving and yet…Shizuo’s eyes, they too looked… Izaya
huffs loudly and goes to the sink to wash his face, then goes home.
On the way to his room, he sees his parents in their bedroom talking on their
phones as they pack the rest of their things. His sisters are in there too,
running around and having one-sided conversations with them. Izaya doesn’t even
care, his mind is too occupied.
He gets on his bed and takes out his laptop. It’s only then that he lets
himself think about all the things that happened today and the day before.
Izaya should be used to confusion by this point. He doesn’t know what the hell
Shizuo’s doing or why he's doing it but above all, Izaya can't understand his
own reactions to it. He’s responding to it. Just that thought alone makes him
want to tear his hair out.
He closes his laptop, never having turned it on in the first place, and gets
ready for bed.
Chapter End Notes
     I don't have any idea when the next chapter will come out but I am
     thinking of getting several chapters written at once first. It will
     help the flow of the story as well as my creative process. Please
     gimme your thoughts, if you noticed any errors lemme know!
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