Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/5626378.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Underage
  Category:
      M/M, Multi
  Fandom:
      World_Wrestling_Entertainment, Professional_Wrestling
  Relationship:
      Dean_Ambrose_|_Jon_Moxley/Roman_Reigns/Seth_Rollins_|_Tyler_Black
  Character:
      Dean_Ambrose_|_Jon_Moxley, Seth_Rollins_|_Tyler_Black, Roman_Reigns
  Additional Tags:
      Slow_Build, Domestic_Violence, Alternate_Universe_-_Wrestling, Seth_is_a
      fanboy, No_SHIELD, Family_Issues, nerd_seth, badboy_dean, Protective
      Roman, Alcohol_Abuse/Alcoholism, Age_Difference, FCW_-_Freeform,
      ambrollins_-_Freeform, Trust_Issues, Anger, anger_issues, Mood_Swings,
      Insecurity, Shyness, Alternate_Universe, Embarrassment, Dean_is_a_Bad
      Influence, and_a_bit_of_a_stalker, roman_is_really_protective, this_is_95
      percent_angst, BUT_I_PROMISE_THEREIS_A_HAPPY_END, Ambrolleigns_-_Freeform
  Stats:
      Published: 2016-01-03 Updated: 2018-03-10 Chapters: 20/? Words: 77931
****** Cry me a River ******
by moxplicit
Summary
     After being given two tickets for an FCW show on Christmas, Seth
     Rollins, a shy teen with a huge passion for wrestling, gets the
     chance to hang out with Dean Ambrose and falls head over heels for
     the much older male. It doesn’t take long for him to pick up on
     Dean’s mood swings and drinking habits which soon seem to consume
     their whole relationship. Roman Reigns made it his mission to fix
     everything and to make everyone happy.
Notes
     Hi so this is my new story or the prologue of my new story. You do
     not necessarily need to read it and can just wait for the first
     chapter but it gives you some background infomation of Seth Rollins
     as a character in this story. I hope you guys can understand that
     updates maycome slower sometimes since it's my last year of High
     School and I have to start preparing for finals which will be in
     march. Still I hope you guys will enjoy it. For those who have been
     reading and following my other story and wonder why I don't update
     anymore, let me just tell you I've had hell of a year but once finals
     are over I will try updating it again since I have super cool plans
     for Take A Walk On My Side. For this story right here I have a vague
     idea of where I'm going to take things. For now stay tuned, the first
     chapter will follow fast, this prologue just being an introduction of
     what is to come.
***** Prologue *****
On Jersey Avenue in Orlando, Florida a house has been built in the 1980ies by a
construction company who was ordered to do so by a man named Steve Kennedy
Rollins. It wasn’t a big house just enough for him and his future wife and
maybe one, two or even three children in the future. The house was close to
Crystal Lake giving Steve the freedom to fulfill his dream of building his own
boat and going fishing from time to time to get his head cleared after his
daily work at a local restaurant. Steve was a chef at the Ceviche Tapas in
Orlando.
In 1982 Steve met Jennifer at is friend’s birthday party and fell in love.
Jennifer at the age of 18 back then had just finished High School and moved to
Orlando to start a schooling at the Orlando International Airport Hotel to
become a made. Steve himself was 23 but the five years of age difference never
seemed to bother either. It didn’t take long for them to get married and move
in together into the house on Jersey Avenue. In fact it only took them four
years.
It took another year for Jennifer to get pregnant for the first time and in
1988 Steve and Jennifer’s first son was born. Jeremy was a healthy and
beautiful boy, all giggles and smiles and never crying. Another two years later
Jennifer got pregnant again and Seth Rollins was born. His little sister
Abigail was born three years later.
1993 family Rollins was complete, sharing the wonderful home on Jersey Avenue
in Orlando. This was 14 years ago.
                                      •••
As his alarm went off Seth groaned in frustration. Seven o’clock in the
morning. Christmas morning. Who in the world had introduced the tradition of
opening christmas gifts that early in the morning? Seth definitely wasn’t the
one. Since he had no other choice though he decided to get up before either of
his parents would storm into his room and literally pull him out of bed. He’d
risked this twice in his life and regretted both times. After opening the gifts
and having breakfast he could go back to bed and get some more rest. His only
motivation to get up for now.
It was a shame though being ripped out of his dreams about Justin Timberlake.
Before he’d fallen asleep the night before he’d imagined how it’d feel to get
just one kiss by the endlessly sexy singer and in his dreams the fantasy went
on, Seth seeing himself making out with Justin backstage after a concert of the
other male. He hated being interrupted when having a great dream like this.
His room was super cold so Seth wrapped his blanket around his shoulders as he
moved over to his wardrobe on wobbly legs still drunk on sleep due to being
awake so long the night before. The rest of the family had been over for
christmas dinner and they didn’t leave until midnight. After that he was wide
awake and watched a DVD of Justin’s concert he’d gotten for his birthday. Since
he still hadn’t been tired after that he put the DVD of this year’s
Wrestlemania in his playstation and couldn’t fall asleep until it was over and
then of course there was his imagination about Timberlake which would finally
help him fall asleep. This wasn’t before 3am thought.
Reaching his wardrobe Seth put on some sweatpants without dropping the blanket,
not even once risking losing the warmth inside of his blanket-coat. On his head
his hair probably was a mess, blonde and brown strands lying in every direction
but he didn’t bother putting them in a bun. It was only his parents and
siblings who’d see him anyway.
Instead he made his way out of his room, eyes barely open as he got to the
living room. His sister was already there, hot cocoa in her hands and a smile
on her face. How could she even be awake awake enough to smile this early? With
only a low grumble on his lips to tell her good morning Seth dropped down next
to her and tried cuddling into his blanket enough to vanish in it but he was
too big for the piece of fabric so his head had to keep sticking out.
“Abby?” His mom’s voice came from the kitchen where she probably had been
preparing the breakfast for an hour now which he could only guess but was
pretty sure of since she always put effort into everything concerning her
family. “Are your brothers up yet? Please go check if they are at least in the
bathroom by now. We want to start opening the gifts soon.”
His little sister emptied the cup in her hands and got up from the couch.
“Seth’s here.” She yelled back. Seemed like she wasn’t as awake or happy to be
awake either since the sleep was still thick on her voice. “Stop yelling.” Seth
mumbled, closing his eyes again as he dropped his head back against the back of
the couch. Abigail rolled her eyes as he spoke and went to leave the living
room.
Nice, maybe he could nap for just a couple of minutes longer. This wish was
crushed by his brother just seconds after he finished his thought. “Morning,
herring.” Now that was a way to be pulled out of the sleep Seth was just
falling back into. As if it could save him from his brother Seth turned his
head to the side, nuzzling his face into his blanket too. “Ah, baby brother.
Too tired from staying up all night watching wrestling to open your gifts now?
Don’t worry, I’ll gladly take yours too if you even get any.”
Jeremy dropped down on the couch next to Seth and wrapped his arm around his
little brother’s shoulder, letting it slide up to his neck to put the smaller
boy in a headlock and press his face into Jeremy’s chest. Now Seth was
definitely awake, struggling for oxygen as his glasses were pressed into his
face too. “Get off me, Jer’” He tried pulling free but there wasn’t much muscle
on his body to push off his brother.
“What? What’d you say?” His older brother tightened his grip, taking away all
of Seth’s oxygen so his head turned more red every second and his only attempts
of beating his brother in the stomach got weaker until he was sure he’d pass
out if Jeremy didn’t let go right now. Luckily his mother entered the room.
“Jeremy, let go of your brother. It’s Christmas, can’t the two of you get along
just once?”
Immediately Seth was released. He started coughing in order to get back some
air into his lungs as he put one hand on his chest which started hurting
already. Jeremy was chuckling next to him and Seth glared at him. While he was
still doing so his mom handed them both a cup of hot chocolate just like Abby
had gotten before. “Seth stop glaring at your brother.” His mother demanded in
the very same moment. “And Jeremy stop assaulting Seth. You’re not kids
anymore, boys. Now drink your hot chocolate while I go find your father.”
As soon as Jennifer had left the room Jeremy rammed his elbow into Seth’s ribs
to make him cry out in pain with a tiny “Fuck..” on his lips as he almost
spilled his chocolate over his blanket and crotch. “Asshole, what the hell?”
Again he glared at his brother who was still chuckling. Seth tried to slide to
the very end of the couch which wasn’t as far away from his brother as he would
have liked it.
Luckily his father and sister finally entered the living room and so did his
mother so they were finally complete. Abby and her dad sat on the floor in
front of the couch after the big man told his sons good morning. Jennifer sat
between her sons. “Alright since I know you all want to go back to your beds we
should start. Abby pick the first gift and give it to someone.”
This was a game his family was playing every year. The youngest one picking out
the first present, handing it to it’s receiver who picked the next present and
gave it to his receiver who picked the next present and so on and so on. Since
he knew his siblings would leave him out for now on purpose he just watched
them unwrapping their gifts while he finished his cocoa.
As his mother got passed the present he had gotten her he put aside his cup
which was empty anyway to watch her unwrapping it. It was Jamie Oliver’s COOK
with Jamie which he knew she had been hoping to get for Christmas. She loved
cooking the British’s food for her family. Immediately a smile grew on her lips
which made Seth smile too. “Thank you, Santa.”, the woman told into the small
round before grabbing the next gift, looking for a name on it. “This one is for
Seth.”
Finally his first present. It didn’t take long for him to unwrap it and hold
the DVD of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix in his hands. “Awesome!”
Harry Potter was always something to make Seth happy with. “Thank you.” As he
now got up he pushed up his glasses on his nose so they wouldn’t fall off as he
leaned down to pick up a present and hand it to his sister.
The unwrapping seemed to take longer than usually. Seth got the DVD, two books
and a game for his Playstation along with new shoes and socks and a t-shirt of
his favorite wrestler, Jeff Hardy. This was all awesome and all stuff he’d
wished for besides the socks and shoes which he needed though. As he looked at
the things next to him he knew there were still three gifts under the tree
which his mom just passed out now in order to let the traditional unwrapping
find an end. “This one is for you, Steve, this is for Abby and this is for
Seth.”
The gift Seth was handed was flat and small and looked like an envelope which
was wrapped up. It was exactly that which he found out as he pulled off the
wrapping paper. Hopefully the envelope wasn’t filled with money, Seth hated
getting money for Christmas it always was such a ‘I didn’t know what else to
get you so go get yourself something’-kind of gift. Abigail who had already
unwrapped a new pair of shoes too was now staring at the envelope. “Come on,
open it already. I’m starving.”
She rolled her eyes as he kept taking his time. It was no money. Instead Seth
pulled out two tickets for a FCW show. Florida Championship Wrestling. His
heart started beating faster immediately. “Holy hell!” Both his parents started
smiling at him.
FCW was not only the development program of the WWE but it was also the local
wrestling company. Seth had been into wrestling for years by now. He never
missed a show and saved up his pocket money so he could watch all the PPVs too.
That his parents got him tickets to watch a live show was pretty awesome. Since
FCW shows were not available on TV Seth didn’t know many of the wrestlers
there, he’d heard some names and sometimes some of them had guest appearances
on Raw or Smackdown but besides that he didn’t know much about them.
Still it was awesome his parents had gotten him a present he could definitely
enjoy. “Thank you so much.” While he was still gushing about the gift
internally his siblings had already gotten up and moved to the kitchen together
with his mother. Steve heaved his body on the couch so he could sit next to his
son for a minute.
“You can go there with whoever you want but if none of your friends want to go
I’ll gladly go with you son.” Seth smiled to his dad. They always had shared a
pretty good relationship, Seth loving to go fishing with his dad and learning
how to cook from him too. “Thanks, dad.” The 16-year old put the tickets back
into the envelope before him and his dad went to have breakfast too.  
***** Chapter 2 *****
Chapter Summary
     How was he supposed to make a decision like that when he could barely
     walk straight due to feeling light headed ever since Jon Moxley had
     winked at him? No matter which option he’d choose, it was gonna be a
     long night. Seth felt that already.
Chapter Notes
     So this is the first chapter and I put big effort into finishing it
     before I go to bed but it's 3:34am now and snowing like hell outside
     which I already hate so what you see is what you get and I hope you
     enjoy the way Dean and Seth meet for the first time.
The parking lot was packet already as Seth and his father arrived at the WWE
performance center. It was February and pretty mild outside, Seth wore a simple
jeans jacket over a black shirt which he matched with black jeans and red
chucks. They were pretty much everything he ever wore on his feet. His hair he
had pulled into a bun in his neck since the usual bun or ponytail at the top
and back of his head was maybe more comfortable but also made him look girlier
and since he had such soft facial features anyway he already looked so much
younger and more pretty than handsome which most 16 year old guys probably
aimed to be in order to impress the ladies (eventhough Seth would have loved to
impress the boys more).
On his nose his big glasses rested as Seth helped his dad looking for a free
lot for their car to park in. When his parents had gotten him the wrestling
tickets for FCW he hadn’t known what to expect and he missed checking the
internet for it too until last night. It was just then that he’d found out that
FCW shows were mostly held in nothing more but old and empty factories or
warehouses. Since it had been late too last night he didn’t check out many of
the wrestlers that were scheduled for the event either.
He knew there’d be a big guy they called Leakee who was related to The Usos.
Those guys he knew since they were part of the WWE main roster which he watched
on the weekly TV episodes of WWE shows. Of the other scheduled people he didn’t
check out any info besides their names so all of this would be a surprise for
him.
Finally his dad found a spot for the car and Seth jumped out of it right away.
“You got the tickets, son?”
“Yes, dad. Hurry.” Seth knew he was acting like a little boy but this was a big
deal for him. His siblings at home might roll their eyes over his excitement
but this was his chance to check out the future of his favorite TV show so he
tried ignoring them whenever he talked about wrestling at home.
Together with his dad he entered the arena which in fact was only a funny
smelling old warehouse. Their tickets were checked and they got a stamp on the
back of their hands so they could walk around the arena and go inside and
outside whenever they wanted to. Not too quickly due to all the people looking
for their seats, Seth and his dad found their seats in the third row and put
their jackets over the back of their chairs. “I’ll find us something to drink.
What do you want?” While his dad was talking he digged around in his jackets
inside pocket to find his wallet.
“Sure, beer.” His dad looked at him and chuckled. “Seth.” was all he said.
“Alright just coke.” It was always worth a try, right? His dad wandered off and
Seth just looked around the tall room, soaking it all in, the empty ring in the
middle, all the people around him, the classic rock music making it impossible
to follow any of the conversations around.
A look at his watch promised the show would start any second. Finding a spot
for the car had taken longer than Seth had realized. Two minutes later the
lights went off and the music was shut down. People found their seats back and
so did Seth’s dad who handed his son the cool coke. The show started and Seth
was wrapped up in it immediately. If he had thought wrestling was awesome to
watch on TV before he now definitely was sure there was nothing better than
watching wrestling live. Fists hit bodys, bodys hit the matt, kicks were
delivered and faster as Seth liked it it was already time for the main event.
“Ladies and gentlemen it is now time for our main event. The following match is
a two on one handicap elimination match.” In the middle of the ring a beautiful
girl with dark caramel skin was balancing on her high heels, holding a
microphone to her mouth as she smiled and waited for the first music to hit.
The music was a low and loud grumble which made the speakers give away some
scratchy sounds but Seth barely focussed on that. A big guy stepped out of the
curtain, looking angry and serious as he was ready to fight whoever would give
him funny looks.
“Introducing first, from Pensacola Florida, weighing 280 pounds, Leakee!” The
announcer exaggerated the last syllable of the wrestlers name while the big guy
entered the ring, threw back his dark and long black hair and let out an
animalistic roar as he leaned back to do so. Then the music cut. “Introducing
his partner.”
Another music hit and a couple of seconds later a blonde guy came to the ring.
He looked more like a model with the tight wrestling pants and funny colorful
boots. “From Daytona Beach, Florida, weighing 206 pounds, Mike Dalton!” The
blonde guy made a big deal of  entering the ring, trash talking to the fans who
booed him, going on about how he was way too good to be here and be watched by
a bunch of uggoes as he called them. His music was cut soon too while he was
still ranting. “And their opponent.”
The sound of electric guitars hit the room and Seth stretched his neck to get a
better look at who was making his way to the ring next. He had to push up his
glasses as they kept sliding forward on the back of his nose. “From Cincinnati,
Ohio, weighing 225 pounds, Jon Moxley!” Quickly as she could on her heels the
girl got out of the ring and sat down by the time keepers.
Seth couldn’t see the guy until he was making his way up the stairs to the ring
and if he’d thought that the Leakee dude looked angry and dangerous he didn’t
find words for the man he was looking at now. Glaring blue eyes who seemed to
kill everyone the man looked at. He was tall, had long legs and a muscular body
which was dressed in black trunks with a red and white target disc on it in the
front and Mox written over the guy’s ass. It was a nice ass which Seth had just
noticed as his attention was drawn away from it due to the Jon guy turning to
look at the people on Seth’s side of the audience.
Under the black jeans jacket which was falling off of one of Moxley’s shoulders
the man hid a flat belly. His hair was a mess of dirty blond, wet strands and
his legs were hidden behind black knee pads and leather boots. He made a big
show of looking dangerous without saying a word while this Dalton dude was
already going off again about how ugly Jon Moxley was and how Leakee had to
start off so he could mentally prepare himself for touching a gross person.
Leakee just chuckled at that. The guy had a really handsome smile. Moxley’s
music was still playing as he got out of his jacket and threw it in the crowd.
Right in Seth’s direction. Seth wanted to reach out to grab it but he shied
away as he realized it would land in the row in front of him anyway.
Neither Dalton nor Leakee had moved out of the ring and Moxley had now turned
towards them, letting Seth watch his butt again which he would have never
admitted was the center of his attention for a moment. Before the 16-year old
could even make up his mind about it though the brawl started. Moxley ran right
into Dalton, pinning him in the corner as he started throwing fists at the
blondes stomach.
“Stop fucking touching me you sweaty sucker!” Dalton screamed but was unable to
free himself. It was his luck Leakee was still in the ring. The big man put his
arms around Moxley’s waist and pulled him back just a bit to throw him over his
head for a german suplex, throwing him far enough so the dirty blonde would end
up on the matt in his corner of the ring. He didn’t stay down though. Instead
he got up again immediately and stood tall in front of Leakee, eyes furiously
fixed on his face.
Moxley was the first one to slap Leakee in the face. Then the other way around.
Then Moxley hit again, hits went back and forth before Moxley could start
landing a slap and chop combination over and over again until he pushed Leakee
into the ropes and rammed his knee into his guts as the big guy came back. Then
it was Moxley who went to move to the other side of the ring, leaned into the
ropes and in the exact moment Leakee came towards him but Mox was faster and
threw himself onto the big dog, hitting him down to the matt with a cross body.
Immediately he started throwing fists at his opponent as he was sitting on top
of him.
This he did only as long until Leakee could push him off. Both men got back to
their feet but this time it was Leakee who hit Mox down with a clothesline. The
smaller one got up just to be knocked down again.
On the outside of the ring Dalton was cheering for his partner and insulting
Moxley. The fight went back and forth and back and forth, Leakee trying to tag
in his partner but Jon not letting it happen. He made sure to keep as much of
the fight as possible on his side of the ring. More punches and kicks were
exchanged, pins were broken just as submissions until Jon finally managed to
put on a move which first looked like a double chickenwing but he raised his
opponent in the air. This he did slow due to Leakee being heavier than him
probably and just as Mox finally had his opponent lifted off the floor he
dropped him down, face first and letting him land between his stretched legs.
Quickly he moved around his opponent, turned him to his belly before pinning
him. The whole arena was on fire and counted along with the ref. “1, 2, 3!” The
bell rang and the announcer got off her chair, didn’t enter the ring though.
“Leakee has been eliminated after 14 minutes and 38 seconds. Remaining
opponents in the ring are: Mike Dalton versus Jon Moxley.”
The fight between Dalton and Moxley didn’t last as long as his fight with
Leakee. This was probably due to him already being exhausted. Still everytime
someone pinned the other Seth’s heartbeat went up, scared the match might end
already and scared Moxley might not win the match. He clearly was on the dirty
blondes side. Finally Moxley hit a move everyone went crazy about. The guy next
to Seth screaming something about Moxicity which was probably the name of the
finisher. Jon Moxley had finished the pretty boy. 1, 2, 3 and the match was
over, Moxley’s music hitting the room as he jumped to his feet, screaming and
ranting, arms raised to the air, sweat and spit flying everywhere. “Here is
your winner, Jon Moxley!”
Sadly neither of the wrestlers stayed in the ring for long as the show was
over. Moxley and Dalton made their way backstage almost immediately and the
music that had been playing before the show was back in the room. People
started leaving the warehouse but Seth stayed put on his seat a little longer
overwhelmed by what he had just witnessed. Watching wrestling live was so much
cooler than watching it on TV. The feeling of being in the crowd had gotten him
all tingly and itchy and he’d jumped off his seat everytime something exciting
had been happening.
“You ready to go, son?” Seth’s dad pulled him out of his thoughts as he was
still staring at the empty ring. The two toned nod and got off his seat,
putting on his jacket. While doing so his eyes fell on the chair in the row in
front of him. Someone had forgotten his jacket so he grabbed it and turned to
his dad in order to ask if they should bring it to someone who was responsible
here in case someone went looking for the jacket. As he held it in his hands
though he felt the wetness on it and unfolded it to look at it.
No one had forgotten to take their jacket with them but the guy in the row in
front of him had forgotten to take along the jacket Jon Moxley had thrown at
them. Immediately his heartbeat started to rush again. He was holding a real
wrestlers jacket in his hands. The first thing Seth could think of was pressing
his face into the fabric and take a deep breath of the scent on it but
considering his father was standing right next to him it probably wasn’t a
really good idea. “Look at you getting lucky, Seth.” His dad placed his hand on
his shoulder.
A wide smile was resting on Seth’s lips. “Come on, let’s get going. Your mom is
probably waiting for us already eventhough I told her not to.” Seth simply nod
still too caught up in his happiness and shock about finding the jacket.
Without questioning it he followed his dad until they passed the merchandise
table.
“Hey dad, can you get me one of the shirts?” His father turned around to check
out the price table before he allowed his son to pick one shirt. Immediately
the two toned picked the Jon Moxley shirt. “Can you hold this for a second?”
Passing his dad the jacket of the wrestler he got out of his own jacket and put
the newly bought shirt over his own shirt before putting his jacket on again
and taking the other jacket from his dad’s hands. “Thanks.” Seth smiled again
and pushed up his glasses.
To his left there were a couple of people surrounding someone but Seth was too
short to see what was going on. His dad sighed. Of course he could see what was
going on and he stopped together with his son. “It’s the guy of the last
match.”
“Which one of them?”
“The one with the jacket.”
Jon Moxley! “Dad, you can go to the car I just want to go get my shirt signed
by him, okay?” Since his dad was a heavy smoker he agreed and made his way back
to the car in the parking lot while Seth found his place in the row of people
who were waiting to get to Jon.
It took too damn long and Seth being the last in row didn’t really make
anything better. He waited and waited for the people in front of him to vanish.
His dad was probably waiting impatiently outside but Seth wouldn’t let this
once in a lifetime chance slip away from his fingers. Finally there was only
one little girl with her dad in front of him. He could watch her talking to
Moxley while swaying back and forth on his feet. It was something he did since
he was a child. Whenever he got nervous he just started swaying back and forth.
While still waiting he got a chance to muster Moxley. From this close he didn’t
even look that dangerous anymore. Sure as hell he was tall. Really tall. He
beat Seth by a couple of inches (which wasn’t actually too hard, Seth still
waited for that growing push most guys in his age had already witnessed). Still
he was in his trunks and his wet skin looked soft even with the scars on them
which Seth could only see now that he got closer. The blue eyes seemed even
more blue and less aggressive now, it even looked really cute how the tall man
got down to his knees to talk to the little girl. She wanted to take a picture
with him and stood between his legs, Jon smiled for the camera and the dimples
appearing on his cheeks made Seth’s breath stutter for a second.
Before he could continue thinking about them though the little girl left and
the blue eyes now focussed on him. They wandered up and down his body which
made him feel pretty uncomfortable in his skinny, lanky teenager body. “You
gonna stand there all day and stare?” Moxley’s voice sounded rough and rose
goose bumps on Seth’s skin.
“Uhm, sorry.” He ducked his head but stepped forward. Moxley kept mustering him
and chuckled.
“So?”
The wrestler looked at him as if he expected something from Seth. “So..?” The
teenager was unsure of what to say or do. That made Moxley chuckle again.
“So you wanna take a picture, want me to sign something or did you come here to
just stare?” Oh. Now Seth felt stupid.
“Oh, sorry. I just wanted you to sign my shirt.”
“Alright kid. Got a pen or something?”
“No, sorry.”
Instead of chuckling Jon Moxley laughed loudly now, one hand on his stomach.
“You’ve been standing here for what, two minutes? And you apologized to me
three times already. Well this time I’m sorry kid, I don’t have a pen either.
Anything else I can do for you?” Seth took a deep breath and swallowed. He
didn’t imagine talking to Jon Moxley, a man he had just started admiring, like
this. He was so rude and cocky considering Seth was a fan that wanted nothing
but five minutes with the wrestler.
“Thanks. I have no camera for a picture so.. No.” Again he had ducked his head
and his sweaty fingers were clinging to the jacket of the man he was standing
in front of. His face must be red as a tomato and his glasses slid forward on
the back of his nose but now he was already in the middle of this mess and
there was no way out besides just running away like a crybaby.
That man in front of him took a deep breath and sighed. “Wait a sec, kid.” In
just his trunks the dirty blonde jogged over to where some girls were clearing
the merchandise table. With a cocky smirk on his lips he talked to them for a
second before coming back to Seth, a silver pen in his hands. “Where do you
want it, kid?”
“Where do I..?” Seth probably had question marks written all over his face and
Moxley rolled his eyes at him, making Seth feel uneasy about the situation
again.
“Where do you want the shirt to be signed?” The taller one was almost snapping
at him by now but seemed to pull himself together immediately as he noticed the
way he must sound to this dorky nerd in front of him.
Seth shrugged and had to push up his glasses once again. “Just on my chest.” He
wanted to leave as soon as possible so if Moxley would just get over with the
autograph Seth would be pretty thankful. And the wrestler did lean forward to
start signing the shirt, smiled in satisfaction as he was done. “Thanks.” The
two toned mumbled.
“Sure thing. Got lucky here, eh kid?” Blue eyes looked down to Seth’s hands
where he was holding on to the jacket still. “Take good care of it. ‘s a good
jacket to keep you warm.” If Seth was honest to himself he really doubted that
it was just a jeans jacket after all but then again he wasn’t really surprised
Jon Moxley would say something weird. After all he was called a lunatic which
was also written in big red letters on his t-shirt.
In order to nod at the taller and older one Seth raised his head again. “Yes,
someone left it at their seats.”
“Well that’s good for you then, isn’t it? Listen boy, I’d love to keep
chattering with you especially since you keep blushing and ducking your head
for me which is really cute but I’m dying to get a hot shower. You come to the
shows often? Maybe next time you can bring your own pen and then I’ll sign
your.. Whatever else you wanna get signed.”
Jon kept jumping back and forth between topics. Pencil? Shower? Cute? Come here
again? How was all of this even connected and how was it all part of their
conversation? Wasn’t Seth disappointed and even a bit scared about Moxley
snapping at him just a couple of seconds ago and now he acted like they knew
each other and should hang out? Talking to this guy was really confusing but he
had to at least try to answer in order to not make a fool out of himself again.
“I don’t come here often, no. This was my first live wrestling show.”
“So now that you saw how awesome I’m doing in the ring you will come more often
though, won’t you?” A cocky grin appeared on the taller man’s lips.
“I sure want to!” Seth got a bit excited over the question completely ignoring
that Moxley wasn’t asking because he wanted to see him again but because he
wanted to be praised to heaven for doing a good job. With his cheeks still
flushed in excitement and embarrassment Seth lowered his head again. “But I
can’t. The tickets are too expensive.”
Since his eyes were still focussed on the taller man’s face Seth could
practically see him going back and forth in his head about what to answer at
this small, two toned fan in front of him. “Hm.” The dirty blonde nod and
shrugged his shoulders. “That’s too bad but maybe you’ll still get to watch us
wrestlers again. Lemme give you a good hint in case you want some more than
just Jon Moxley in his sweaty trunks. I heard that tonight the guys go to a bar
called The Cave. Maybe you should check it out too. I sure as hell will be
there to see who else is gonna come. See you around, kid.”
And with a wink Jon Moxley turned around and started strolling down the long
hallway of the warehouse, whistling some strange melody before he vanished
behind a heavy iron door.
A bar? Seth Rollins, the ever blushing and shy teenager in a bar? Seth Rollins,
the 16-year old who had to be driven around by his dad in a bar? That was such
a contrast that never in his life he could imagine himself and a bar being
mentioned in the same sentence. Not to speak of how he was too young to get
inside anyway, 21 was still years away from where he was now.
His eyes were still focussed on the door behind which Jon Moxley was probably
taking off his trunks and the boots and got under the shower, touching himself
in places and Seth would now just go back home and lay in his bed and over
think what would happen if he really went to that bar. It wasn’t fair. The way
Moxley talked, the way he looked at him, the way he was rude and charming at
the same time, it all just wasn’t fair. How was Seth even supposed to make a
decision when this asshole basically demanded him to come to the bar
(eventhough he didn’t demand but well)?
While turning around to go finding his dad Seth already played back and forth
the scenarios that the night would hold for him. #1: He could just stay at
home, probably steal his dad’s laptop to gush over Jon Moxley videos on
YouTube, dream about him instead of Justin Timberlake tonight and wake up with
a hard-on probably which he couldn’t even jerk away since his little sister
slept in the room next door and he’d feel gross if he touched himself.
#2: He could sneak out through his window, get downtown to that bar and sit
outside all night, hoping to get a glimpse of the guys inside and maybe saying
hi to Moxley when he left the bar. Or #3: He’d sneak out, find that bar and
walk inside as if he owned the place, demanding Jon Moxley to immediately
explain why in the world Seth made his way downtown in the middle of the night.

How was he supposed to make a decision like that when he could barely walk
straight due to feeling light headed ever since Jon Moxley had winked at him?
No matter which option he’d choose, it was gonna be a long night. Seth felt
that already.
***** Chapter 3 *****
Chapter Summary
     "While Seth put on his pajama his thoughts went back to Jon. He was
     probably sitting in that bar right now enjoying some beer, laughing
     with his friend and maybe even missing Seth because he invited him
     there. The teenager grabbed his brush to take care of his hair while
     he let his thoughts wander and he just dreamed a bit about Jon taking
     him home and them sharing a bed and laughing when they woke up in the
     morning and find hickeys on their bodies."
Chapter Notes
     Yeeeeey a new chapter. I made it. Sadly I wrote this in the middle of
     the night AGAIN and I'm too lazy now to double check it so please
     don't be too mean on any mistakes. Also thank you so much for all the
     comments I LOVE reading your guys' reaction. Keep doing that so I
     know what you think. Tomorrow I'm going on a trip to the Netherlands
     to check out a potential university for me isn't that exciting? I'm
     very excited. Anyway enjoy this chapter!
49 birds had visited the big cherry tree in the last one and a half hour. Seth
had been sitting at his desk trying to finish some work before he went to sleep
but all he could do was staring at the tree in the backyard which was just a
couple of meters away from his window. His desk had its place in front of the
window since he believed it’d give him some kind of inspiration for his
homework if he didn’t have to stare at a plain wall while thinking and it
usually worked pretty fine too but tonight after the show he just wasn’t able
to focus on anything else than asking himself if he should go and find that bar
downtown.
Could he even get out of the house without his parents hearing him? He probably
could since his room was on the ground floor and he’d only have to jump down
like a meter when he wanted to escape through his window. But what if his
mother came looking for him before she went to bed or his dad would come in or
whatever? He just couldn’t be sure they wouldn’t notice.
Still this was probably a once in a lifetime chance of meeting Jon Moxley and
it also had been some kind of invitation, hadn’t it? After taking a deep breath
Seth shook his head and closed his math book. He still had some time to finish
the assignment. It was due to wednesday and it was just thursday night the week
before.
As he put his book back into the small shelf he had on his desk to keep it
organized his thoughts wandered back to Jon Moxley. Maybe going to meet him in
the middle of the night wasn’t such a good idea anyway. The guy could probably
kill him and no one would notice it. He was crazy not just in the ring as Seth
had already experienced that after the show. His mood swings had had Seth
scared. Not terrified but definitely uncomfortably scared. The more he thought
about his different options the more Seth’s head started hurting so he decided
to get some tea before going to bed.
With pretty slow motions since Seth was kind of tired he made his way down the
hall to the kitchen. While the water took its time boiling he went in the
living room to check out if his parents were still up. “Hey, honey.” His mother
said as he entered the room. “Don’t you want to go to bed?”
“Yes, just making some tea before I do.”
“Sure, honey.” Jennifer gave him a big smile before putting her head down on
her husband’s chest again. Seth turned around to leave the room and go back to
the kitchen. The tea bag he put in his cup, poured the water on it and let the
whole thing rest for a couple of minutes before throwing the tea bag in the
trash and taking the cup to his room. “Good night.” For just a couple of
seconds he poked his head back into the living room before reaching his room.
The tea he put down on the bed pint.
While Seth put on his pajama his thoughts went back to Jon. He was probably
sitting in that bar right now enjoying some beer, laughing with his friend and
maybe even missing Seth because he invited him there. The teenager grabbed his
brush to take care of his hair while he let his thoughts wander and he just
dreamed a bit about Jon taking him home and them sharing a bed and laughing
when they woke up in the morning and find hickeys on their bodies.
A sigh left him again and he now he lay down in his bed and turned on his CD
player to listen to the last album of Anti Flag. It came out about a year ago
but Seth couldn’t stop listening to it. He slowly drank his hot tea now and
stared at the wall on the other side of the room where a big poster of Jeff
Hardy was hung up.
It was probably better for him to stay home, Jon Moxley wouldn’t really want
him there he probably just said it out of pity because Seth was this funny
looking kid with two different hair colors and those big glasses on his nose.
That thought hurt him more than Seth wanted to. Wasn’t Moxley just a stranger
to him? The more he thought about it the more Seth wanted to prove himself,
wanted to prove that there was a reason for Jon to invite him to the bar.
And there it was. That was the decision. Seth finished his tea and took a deep
breath. There was no other way to find out about Moxley’s intentions than just
going to that bar and ask. He’d just have to man up for once in his life.
Before he got up he had to look down his body. Fresh clothes. He needed to get
dressed if he didn’t want to make a fool of himself by showing up in his
Avengers pajama. In order to do that Seth left his bed and put aside the still
warm cup. He went to his wardrobe and digged around. Grey jeans and a Deadpool
shirt had to do it. He even put a blue and white plaid shirt over it so he
wouldn’t be too cold as it openly hung over his shoulders but his arms were now
dressed too. He had to make sure now that his parents were in bed too.
To do so he grabbed the cup he’d been drinking off and quietly made his way to
the kitchen to put it down in the sink. On his way back to his room he checked
the living room. The TV was off and no one was there. As quiet as possible he
walked down the hallway to put his ear on the door of his parent’s bedroom.
Steve was already snoring loudly. Jennifer was asleep as well he guessed and
sneaked down the hallway again to get back to his own bedroom and closed the
door behind him.
All he had to make sure of was him being quiet when he climbed out his window.
After putting on his chucks and his jacket Seth also grabbed his cellphone. It
wasn’t an awesome phone just a Sony Ericsson V630 but it was better than
nothing and he had to take it with him for at least emergencies. Even though
his little trip was a secret he had to be able to call home if something
happened.
Opening the window wasn’t as easy as he had expected it to be because it was
more noisy than he had thought. Finally the thing was open and he climbed out
as carefully as possible, closing the window enough so no animal could come in
but he could still open it again later. Still quietly he crept around the
house, even climbed over the fence so he wouldn’t cause any noise by opening
the gate of the fence. And here he was on the sidewalk of the street in the
middle of the night. Awesome.
It was colder than he had expected so he was glad he got to walk now. The
movement made his body warm up slowly. Since Seth had no exact idea where the
bar was he’d have to ask people once he reached downtown. That he did after a
half an hour walk, scared to death everytime someone crossed his path. Finally
he reached streets with more people on them though and he chose a girl standing
alone on the sidewalk.
She looked really hot. Her dress was tiny and probably not a real dress but
more a long and tight t-shirt that barely covered her ass. Also she wore a
black leather jacket and leather boots that reached above her knees. A tiny
black bag rested on her arm while her bleach blond hair fell over her small
shoulders. On her top lip she had a piercing that sparkled under the light of
the lantern on the street. “Excuse me?” Seth stepped a bit closer as she turned
towards him so it looked like they were having a normal conversation. “Sorry,
uhm, I’m looking for a bar called The Cave. Do you know where that is?”
Her blue eyes wandered up and down his body. “The Cave? Aren’t you a baby
still? Damn I couldn’t even take money off you in case you wanted a blow job.
How old are you, honey? 14? 15?” It just now hit Seth why this gorgeous woman
was standing here all on her own.
“Oh god, sorry!” Seth really was he didn’t mean to interrupt her from work or
anything if she even was working at that moment. “I’m really sorry. I won’t..
Won’t keep bothering you, okay? I’ll just ask someone else.” Just as he wanted
to turn away the girl spoke up again, chuckling a bit before she talked.
“To get to The Cave just walk down the road a bit further, take a left turn at
the third street and just follow the yellow lights.” This time Seth just nod
and thanked her before following her instructions. He wasn’t too sure about
what she meant by following the yellow lights but in case he couldn’t find out
what she meant he’d just ask someone else again.
Soon he turned to the left and immediately he saw what she meant. This street
was a street with fences on one side of the sidewalk. On the fences on every
fencing post an electric yellow light was put up and in some distance he saw a
yellow sign above what looked like a small front terrace to him. With quick
steps Seth kept walking down the sidewalk until he reached the terrace. Many
lights were put up here too and there were chairs and tables and benches with
many blankets and pillows on them to sit outside if the weather allowed it.
Due to chilly weather at nights there was no one sitting outside though. The
terrace was protected by wine plants that climbed up a framework made of wood.
It looked like a place that would be comfortable for long nights with good
friends. Through the arc which made the entrance of the terrace and was
overgrown by wine too he entered the terrace. The wine had grown enough to
build a ceiling too so this was actually like being inside while still being
outside. Seth liked it.
Over the door which wasn’t too far away from him now Seth saw a big sign. “The
Cave” it said in a round logo which was put together by the name of the bar and
the head of a roaring bear. Pretty cool. On the heavy looking wooden door a big
sign said “Not entrance for minors. Must be older than 21”. It was handwritten
and didn’t look really reliable  but it was what kept Seth from walking in. He
shied away and his heart started beating faster again. What was he thinking
just coming down here in the middle of the night? Jon probably wasn’t even
inside that bar and he was making a fool of himself by sitting outside and
panicking about someone who most likely forgot he even existed the second he
turned his back on Seth. But maybe.. Maybe it was worth just taking a peek
through the window? That way he could check out if Jon was there and if he
wasn’t he could just go back home, lay in his bed and cry about being stupid
but at least he could be sure Moxley wasn’t here.
He just had to make sure no one saw him. That would make him look like a creep.
Alright just a quick look, checking the room for dirty blond curls and maybe a
guy with long black hair. Seth figured if Jon talked about guys from work
Leakee might be there too so it was worth a shot looking for him too.
Carefully he moved to the bench that stood right in front of the window. As he
put his hands on the windowsill he could feel it vibrate a bit probably due to
the music inside the bad. Seth tried to show as little of his body as possible
as he looked inside the location. Most seats were taken and he kept looking
around for what he was searching. At the bar he saw a group of men which could
be what he was looking for. He had to stretch his neck a bit to get a better
look, nose pressing against the window and probably getting dirty which he
didn’t think about in that moment. As he stretched just a bit more to look
around the corner he saw him. That definitely had to be Jon. He was really
here, he was.
O no. No. This couldn’t be happening to him. No way. One of Jon’s friends, if
that really was Jon, was getting up probably to take a leak and their eyes met
immediately. Seth’s eyes grew big and he almost fell backwards off the bench as
the guy even pointed at him and everyone of the group of five turned their
heads to look at the window. Immediately he backed away from the window and got
up from the bench, almost tripping over his own feet as he made his way across
the small terrace, escaping through the arc again and pressing his back to the
wine plants.
Hopefully Jon hadn’t seen him. He really hoped for that. While standing there
and trying to catch his breath which he had been out of due to his excitement
and nervousness he looked around the street in front of him. Seth didn’t dare
to make a move and as he was standing there he heard the heavy door being
opened and closed with a muffled sound. Someone was now on the terrace lighting
a cigarette. Hopefully it wasn’t one of Jon’s friends. Still Seth didn’t dare
to move.
“Ugh.” A voice on the terrace grunted as someone sat down as Seth could only
guess since he still didn’t dare to turn around and peek through the wine
plant. “Oh man it sucks sitting out here all’lone for my smoke.” Seth
recognized the voice. “If I only had a friend out here who’d keep me company. A
friend that I even invited here because I’m sure he’d be fun to be around.”
Seth recognized that voice. Should he.. Should he come out of his hiding place
which wasn’t really hidden anyway and face the other guy? After he just
embarrassed himself so much? Could he even look Jon Moxley in the eyes after
peeking through the window like a real creep? On the other hand Jon was
basically calling him out and indirectly said he wanted to see Seth. Also it
was the reason why he was here, right? He was here to see Jon Moxley.
Summoning all the courage left in his body Seth turned to stand under the arc,
directly looking at the wrestler who stared back with a big grin on his lips.
“Look who we have here.”
“Hi.” Seth stood there awkwardly and raised one hand a bit to wave at Jon. He
didn’t know if he should enter the terrace again and sit next to the older guy
or just remain in his place or if he should leave and hide and never ever show
up here again. Jon was still just looking him up and down, cigarette between
his lips which he took out with two fingers now.
“Been creeping around out here for long, babycakes?” Immediately Seth blushed
at the nickname but shook his head. He didn’t dare to say a word which made
Moxley chuckle at him. “Wanna keep standing there or will you move that tiny
ass of yours and sit with me?” Again without answering Seth moved and sat down
next to Jon. He gave him a shy smile as the older guy slid closer to him. The
dirty blonde put his arm down on the back of the bench so Seth was resting
against his strong arm while he kept smiling shyly, cheeks red as hell. “So,
kid. What’s your name?”
Right. Seth hadn’t introduced himself. “Oh, sorry. I’m Seth.” As soon as Seth
finished his sentence Jon started laughing at him, almost coughing since he had
just inhaled some smoke so he had to hit himself on the chest a couple of time.
“Again starting with the apologizing?” He was still coughing just a bit and
shook his head. “Gotta stop that, Seth. Don’t be sorry for yourself.” With the
hand that rested behind Seth Jon clapped him on the shoulder. “Anyway you can
call me Dean.” Dean? Why Dean? Seth drew together his eyebrows to give Jon a
confused look.
“Why would I call you Dean if your name is Jon?”
“I see you’ve got a lot to learn. You really think we use our real names when
we portray a character? That’s pretty dangerous, kid. People will check the
telephone directory and find your home just for a autograph. Nah, we don’t do
that.” Oh so.. Jon Moxley, or Dean, just broke down a whole new world for Seth.
Nothing about his favorite celebreties was true? Was Jeff Hardy’s name even
Jeff? Maybe his name was Peter or even worse.. Steve like his own dad. He
almost got goosebumps at that.
While Seth was still thinking about what Jon, no Dean had just told him the
older one threw his cigarette on the floor and stepped on it to put it out. He
got up too. “You’re gonna come in with me or you gonna keep creeping through
the window?”
For a moment Seth hesitated. “I can’t enter.” He ducked his head after speaking
and could feel his cheeks starting to burn again.
“Why is that?” Dean was standing in front of him and looked down at him as Seth
sighed and dared to peek up at the taller man. His blue eyes almost stapled
Seth to where he was sitting. They were ice cold but still endlessly beautiful.
Dean’s hair was falling into his eyes too making the teenager wanting to reach
out and push the strands out of the wrestlers face. Instead of doing so though
he remained on the bench.
“I’m under age.”
Now Dean mustered him a bit more careful. “Really?” Seth almost didn’t believe
him. Just a couple of minutes ago the girl on the sidewalk had asked him if he
was 14 and Dean took him for being older than 20? Either the guy had no idea
how 20 year old guys looked or he just didn’t take a proper look at Seth
before. The teen was wondering why Jon would want to hang out with him anyway,
no why Dean would want to hang out with him anyway.
“Please don’t joke on my costs. I’m just 16, I can’t go inside a bar even if I
don’t drink.” This time Dean drew up his eyebrows. Again he mustered Seth.
“Well I wasn’t ever good with math anyway.” What? How was his age related to
Dean’s math skills? “But you can still come in so, come on. Get up.” Dean’s
voice had such a demanding sound Seth had no other choice than to follow. He
got up and like a puppy he followed the older man inside the bar. In here it
was finally a bit warmer, standing outside had cooled down his body more than
he’d had thought.
The music wasn’t too loud and as he had already seen from outside most tables
were taken by people in what he guessed Jon’s age. Also the bar was longer than
he had expected. It reached down in a second room which couldn’t be see from
the outside. Now he also understood why the bar wasn’t to be entered by anyone
under 21. There was a small stage with a pole on it. Two ladies were dancing.
They touched each other, kissed and moaned while doing so and they barely wore
anything too. Seth’s eyes must have almost fallen out of his head since he’d
never seen strippers before. Not in real life anyway.
Without noticing he must have stopped in the middle of their way because now
Dean hit him against the shoulder, grinning like a Cheshire Cat while he looked
at Seth’s face. “Never seen a naked girl before?” Since Seth felt caught he
ducked his head again and blushed but immediately followed Dean to where his
friends were sitting. The dirty blonde pulled back a bar stool. “Sit.” His
friends now turned their heads. “Guys that’s Seth. I am going to let him have a
couple of drinks tonight and take care of him.”
What did Dean mean, taking care of him? Couple of shots? What? His friends
seemed to be amused about it and clapped Dean on the shoulder but didn’t seem
to care about them any furhter. Unlike what Seth had been told to call him his
friends called him Ambrose. Probably his last name. Dean Ambrose. Sounded good.
Seth Ambrose. Sounded good. Wait? Who said that? No, definitely not Seth. He
had to blush even though he didn’t say his thoughts out loud. While the two
toned was still busy with his thoughts the wrestler had already fixed him a
drink. A big glass of beer. Hopefully it wouldn’t taste too gross Seth didn’t
want to embarrass himself. “Drink, buddy. This one’s on me for you making your
way here. How did you get here anyway?”
Before Seth answered he took the glass and guided it to his mouth to take a
small sip of it. It didn’t really taste good and was bitter as hell but he
could take another sip without spitting it out again and without pulling a face
at the taste either. “Uhm, I walked.” He answered and nod to underline his
words.
“You walked all the way downtown?” Dean Ambrose drew up his eyebrows again.
“Yes what else was I supposed to do?”
That seemed to be a pretty valid reason to Dean too who raised his own beer to
his mouth and took a sip of it. After putting his glass down he leaned towards
Seth to whisper. “You know, pretty boys like you gotta be careful out there. If
you wander around all by yourself people could mistaken you for a hooker. I
mean I’m sure they’d pay good money to get their dick sucked by that pretty
mouth of yours but next time just hit me up, I’ll pick you up.”
Just like last night Seth didn’t know what part of the conversation he was
supposed to focus on first. Dean saying he was pretty, Dean saying he could be
mistaken for a whore, Dean saying he’d look good pleasuring men with his mouth,
Dean being worried about him running around alone at night, Dean wanting to
pick him up? Too many topics in just one sentence. “Uhm..” His brain was still
progressing. “Thank you, I guess. But how can I hit you up? Do you have a
cellphone?” That was probably the stupidest answer of all but the little sips
he’d taken of his beer already went to his brain and made it hard for him to
think straight. Hopefully he could play it of cool, Dean didn’t need to know
he’d never been drinking before.
As he had expected Dean laughed at him. Luckily the dirty blond had turned his
back on his friends so they didn’t catch him making a fool out of himself.
“Yes, Sethie. I have a cellphone. Do you have a cellphone?” He was still
chuckling as he answered.
“I have a phone too.” He nod and took a sip of his beer again. The more sips he
took the better the alcohol tasted. As he looked back at Dean the older one
started to chuckle again. “What?” Seth asked, voice still sounding shy.
“You have foam of the beer on your top lip. Want me to..” The older one made a
motion to ask Seth if he should vipe away the foam. Seth just nod, cheeks
growing red again. He expected Dean to take a napkin and clean it off but
instead the wrestler put his big and rough hand around the teens throat to hold
him still, leaned forward and licked over Seth’s mouth, catching all the foam
and swallowing it down. Instead of saying something Seth was just stunned and
stared at Dean who’d taken his hand off Seth’s throat again. The world around
him didn’t seem to move and Seth could see the dirty blond moving his mouth but
didn’t hear him say anything. He was way too shocked and enjoyed Dean’s spit on
his top lip way too much.
He didn’t even move again until Dean waved his hand in front of his face.
“Hello? Babycakes? You still with me?” For a quick moment Seth shook his head
but then nod.
“Uh.. Uh.. Yes. Excuse me. What did you say?”
Hi words again seemed to make the older one laugh. “So polite with all your
Sorrys and Thank yous and excuse mes.” Now he was the one shaking his head and
finishing his beer. “I asked you what your phone number was.”
“I don’t know.” This time Seth answered quick. He was still shocked by Dean’s
actions. The other male could change the mood so fast. First he was joking and
laughing then turned to incredibly sexy almost giving Seth a boner and then
turned to being flirty, wanting to exchange phone numbers.
While Seth was trying to figure out his number without having to check his
phone Dean already ordered another beer. Even though the teen didn’t want to
admit it he was pretty tired already. It was probably long after midnight and
the alcohol wasn’t really helping him staying awake. Still he didn’t deny any
of the drinks Dean bought him. After finishing his third beer though he started
feeling sick so as Dean wanted to order again he sloppily hit him on the thigh.
“No, Dean. It’s enough.” His words were a slur and sounded more like “N-Den. ‘s
nough.” but the older one seemed to figure it out anyway.
He chuckled and clapped his younger friend on the back. “You feeling like
you’re 21 now, Seth?” Just as Seth wanted to answer that he didn’t really feel
anything and if being 21 felt like this he didn’t ever want to be 21 the hick-
ups decided to hit him. This time he giggled along with Dean about himself.
“Oh my god.” Seth put his hand on his own mouth. “Did you hear that?”
“Yes I did.” The older one was giving him a big smile showing off his dimples
and in his drunk state Seth couldn’t resist but reached out and poked Dean’s
cheek still giggling hard enough to almost fall off the stool he was sitting
on. Before he could pull back his hand Dean grabbed his wrist, squeezing it
hard. Suddenly he’d stopped smiling and laughing and was looking at Seth as if
he wanted to kill him. The teen took a little longer than usually to notice
that but as he did he immediately looked terrified.
While he was already ducking his head again the older one stared at him
furiously out of his ice blue orbs. “Don’t ever do that again.” His words were
a hiss and Seth nod immediately, hard enough to feel like his head would fall
off any second. He wouldn’t even mind that too much right now because the sound
of Dean’s voice and how he was holding on to the younger ones wrist scared the
teenager. For a little bit longer the wrestler just stared the younger guy down
before letting go of his hand. “Get up. You’re going home.”
Seth whimpered a bit as he was practically shoved off his seat. He was lucky he
didn’t fall down because his legs felt like soft butter but without daring to
look up from his feet (he had to look at them too so he wouldn’t trip) he made
his way to the door slowly. As soon as he was outside he’d run. He’d run and
hopefully end up at home.
How fast the situation had turned from all giggles to Ambrose almost stabbing
him with his eyes he didn’t know but it made him so emotional he wanted to cry
(probably fault of the alcohol but he didn’t figure that out just then). Seth
threw his whole weight against the heavy door to get out and catch some fresh
air. This felt good. With small steps so he wouldn’t trip he left the terrace
too and turned to the left, wanting to follow the yellow lights back to the
main road but before he could walk down the street and further someone grabbed
him by the back of his jacket and pulled him backwards that he tripped and fell
back first against another body. Strong arms caught him. “Where the fuck do you
think you’re going?” The common voice hissed into his ear.
Hick-ups were still shaking his young body. “Home.” He managed to squeeze out
in between and tried gaining some control over his legs again but Dean just
kept pulling him backwards and he kept tripping until he was pushed down onto
the seat of a car.
“Sit the fuck down and don’t throw up in my damn car.” The voice of the older
male was so aggressive Seth ducked his head again and tried climbing out of the
car but the door was shut right in his face. Alright. He took a deep breath and
swallowed down the beer that that seemed to creep up his gullet again. No
throwing up in dean Ambrose’ car. He’d probably be stabbed for real this time
if he did.
Since he was so concentrated on not throwing up he hadn’t even noticed Dean had
started the car. “Where do ya live, Seth?” Now the other one sounded less
aggressive but annoyed anyway.
“Chrystal Lake.” Was all he dared to say. The car took off from where it was
standing and Seth took another deep breath, closing his eyes as he hoped he’d
finally feel less sick then. In the radio some kind of rock band was screaming
their lyrics and it sounded pretty good but Seth still didn’t dare to say
anything since Dean wasn’t talking anyway until they had almost reached the
lake.
“Gotta give me further directions now.” Seth tried explaining as good as
possible where they had to go and it probably took unnecessarily long to get to
his home but eventually they got there. “Here we are.” Dean said and leaned
over the younger boy’s leg to open the door of the car for him. The hick-ups
had stopped by now and Seth turned his head to look at Dean for a moment. It
was hard for him to not fall asleep right away and he held on to the sides of
his seat to make sure he was sitting upright.
“Thank you very much for the drinks and for driving me home.” It was hard but
he managed for form a real sentence. And finally, finally Dean chuckled and
smiled at him again.
“Oh Seth. Ever polite, hm? Look not a problem but you should get inside now
before you fall asleep in my car.” If Dean would keep smiling and being nice
like this Seth wouldn’t mind too much. Maybe he should risk it and just close
his eyes.. No. Dean has asked him to go so he’d leave the man alone for now.
Carefully so he wouldn’t fall seth climbed out of the car and turned around to
close the door. Dean was still smiling at him from the inside and as he drove
off he even waved at Seth. The teen waved back before finally and carefully to
be quite making his way back into his room and getting out of his clothes so he
could fall asleep on his bed in nothing but his underwear.
                                       •
Seth’s alarm wasn’t what woke him up in the morning. Instead it was his tummy
which seemed to be turned upside down. This time not being as quiet he ran into
the bathroom best as he could without falling in his sleepy state, fell to his
knees and emptied his stomach into the toilet bowl.
His mother who was already up preparing her kid’s school lunch immediately came
to the bathroom. “Seth, honey!” Her hand found his back as he threw up again.
Just now again Seth realized how much of an angel his mom was. Softly she
stroked his back and held his hair until he was done. Then she helped him
getting up and cleaning his mouth. As he started brushing his teeth she flushed
the toilet and took a wet cloth to wipe his forehead. “Go back to bed, when
you’re finished, Baby. There is no need for you to go to school when you’re
this sick.”
Since his head hurt like hell and he was still feeling sick Seth didn’t
complain. Instead he cleaned his mouth and washed his face again before going
back to his bed. Daylight already crept into his room but he fell asleep again
almost immediately. For a second he fought that to unlock his phone and sent a
message to his friend in school that he wouldn’t come today but before he could
do that he saw a text message from an unknown number on his display. He almost
didn’t dare to open it but eventually he did.
You left your glasses at my car. -D
***** Chapter 4 *****
Chapter Summary
     Since his head hurt like hell and he was still feeling sick Seth
     didn’t complain. Instead he cleaned his mouth and washed his face
     again before going back to his bed. Daylight already crept into his
     room but he fell asleep again almost immediately. For a second he
     fought that to unlock his phone and sent a message to his friend in
     school that he wouldn’t come today but before he could do that he saw
     a text message from an unknown number on his display. He almost
     didn’t dare to open it but eventually he did.
     You left your glasses at my car. -D
Chapter Notes
     Woah yeah so I didn't update for over a year and I really have no
     other excuse than being lazy. Hopefully you guys still enjoy this and
     lets pray I will be able to update more again. Let's see how things
     go.
The teen had passed out hours ago. Regardless to the sick feeling in his belly
he slept tight and only woke up because he heard his mother working in the
kitchen. For a bit Seth just laid there and recalled what had happened last
night. Had he really met Jon? Dean, not Jon. Did he really gave him a ride
home? Was it even possible that his glasses were still in the car of the
slightly older man? How old was Dean even?
His head hurt at all the questions and he squeezed his eyes shut to rub over
his temples. Too many thoughts, too much hurt. With a groan Seth managed to
roll out of bed. His clothes were sticking to his sweaty skin and the young man
felt uncomfortable. A shower sounded like heaven right now so he went to his
closet, found some fresh sweatpants and a T before getting into the bathroom
and turning on the hot water. Immediately the room filled with hot steam and
Seth got undressed to clean up. Thinking seemed easier as the hot water was
running over his dark haired head.
Now, what should he do? His parents would ask for his glasses, that was sure.
He had to meet Dean. Also, he wanted to meet Dean. Even though the dirty blonde
had scared Seth last night when he’d gotten angry and pulled Seth around on his
jacket, the younger male was still incredibly curious to get to know more about
Dean. Because of that, Seth decided he would text him.
Quickly he finished his shower, dried off and put on some clothes to get back
to his room. As he was seated on his bed he grabbed his phone and opened the
message again. He stared at his screen, trying to come up with the right thing
to say back.
Hey Dean, school ends at 3 tomorrow. Where should I come to meet you? Have a
nice day. - Seth
Before he could think about it too much Seth quickly sent the message, put away
his phone and left his room. He went to find his mother in the kitchen
preparing some soup for him. “Honey, how are you feeling?” She asked in her
typical worried mom voice.
“I’m better.” His voice was still a little tired as he sat at the kitchen
table. Immediately his mother provided him with water and a bowl of hot soup.
First he wasn’t sure whether he should try eating but then his tummy made a
funny noise and he decided to give it a try. The hot liquid felt surprisingly
good as he started swallowing it down. “I think I’ll be fine to go back to
school tomorrow.” He mentioned between sips.
“Are you sure? There is no need to rush if you still feel sick.”
“I already feel a lot better. I think I will be fine tomorrow.”
His mother watched him critically and put her hand on his forehead to see if he
was feeling hot. But he wasn't. “Alright.” She said in approval. “Where are you
glasses?”
Really nobody knew his parents better than Seth. Ha! “I left them in my room.”
He lied quickly. Regardless to his belly now feeling pretty well again Seth was
still rather tired so he finished eating and excused himself, letting his
mother know he wanted to rest some more.
Back in his room Seth checked his phone to see if Dean had sent a message. He
did.
What school do you go to? I’ll pick you up.
Quickly he typed:  I go to Boone High School. Thank you so much.
The rest of the day he spent in bed, reading comics and resting, preparing for
tomorrow.
 
                                      ---
                                        
Classes went by so slowly. His eyes kept running back to the clock but time
just wouldn’t pass. Usually Seth enjoyed biology class a lot but today it
seemed to last forever. Finally. 3pm. The bell rang and Seth jumped off his
seat immediately. Quickly he packed up his stuff and threw on his jacket so he
could leave the building. Last night he didn’t get a good look of what car Dean
was driving and without his glasses he was a little lost anyway, so he got
scared he wouldn’t find him but unlike his expectations he did see him right
away.
Dean was leaning against the side of his Dodge Stealth. The red color of the
car was so bright there was no way he could have missed it. Besides this, the
dirty blonde looked too hot as he stood there with his cigarette between his
lips, smoking like he didn’t have a care in the world for all the minors
running around in front of him. Probably he really didn’t. His long legs, wow
Seth just noticed now how long they were, were covered in a worn out jeans that
was ripped at the left knee. A grey Shirt covered the broad chest of the older
man and the leather jacket together with the messy hair completed Dean’s look.
Everything, including the look on his face, screamed DANGER. Yet, Seth walked
over. He squeezed his eyes a little to get an even better look which was hard
without the glasses.
Eventually Dean seemed to notice him and dropped the cigarette to put it out. A
cocky grin appeared on his face as he saw Seth coming closer. “There you are,
pretty boy.” Five words and Seth was blushing hard already. No way he could
ever get used to that rough sound of Dean’s voice calling him nicknames that no
one had ever put on him before.
“Hey Dean.” He smiled shyly yet proud that he had gotten the name right.
“You’re ready to go?” Dean asked as he opened the passenger side door of the
car.
Seth looked confused. “Where are we going?”
“I’m taking ya for coffee. Now get in the car.” Just like last night his voice
left no room for discussion, woah dangerous, but Seth did as he was told. Could
Dean kidnap him without Seth refusing? Hell ya. That thought didn’t stick in
Seth’s head for long. To be exact, it only lasted until Dean was in the car
too. “Here.” Dean handed over the glasses. Seth wanted to take them but Dean
stopped him by pushing away his hands. Instead he opened the glasses so he
could place them on Seth’s face. A satisfied smile appeared on his face. “There
you go.”
“Thank you.” Seth giggled softly. Gosh, everything with Dean was so exciting
and even if it was just putting on his glasses. Seth was so caught up in
staring at Dean that he barely noticed how they left the campus of school and
drove off. He only snapped out of his trance as the radio started playing a
song he didn’t like. “Can I switch the station?” He asked with a shy voice.
Dean nod so the younger male started changing the station. When another song
turned up that he didn’t like he switched further and further. The brunette
didn’t notice Dean’s smile fading until eventually Dean took one hand off the
wheel and slapped away his finger.
“Just pick one or leave it.” He said in a sharp tone. Seth covered his slightly
stinging hand with his other hand and looked at Dean in shook.
“Sorry.” He said in a quiet voice and left the radio alone. It was clear that
Dean was pissed at him and he couldn’t really do anything about it now other
than apologizing. Instead of receiving an answer Dean put in a CD and both
continued the drive in silence. Just like last night the mood had changed so
quick, it scared Seth. For a moment he considered to ask Dean to stop the car
and just let him go but then again, who knew how the other man would react to
that?
Besides this a bit later they arrived at the café Dean had picked. Seth didn’t
really want to get out of the car but Dean turned his head to look at him. Now
he was smiling again, all dimples and soft blue eyes. “Ya okay?”
Uhm.. No? You just slapped me on the hand and got all angry at me? Are YOU
okay? That’s what Seth thought. Still, he nod and smiled back softly. “I’m
good, yeah.”
“That’s good, pretty boy.” For a moment Dean put his hand on Seth’s thigh and
squeezed it, resulting in the breath of the teen stop just a second. Well, that
just really made everything okay. Then the dirty blonde got out of the car and
Seth did the same to follow. Minutes later they were seated at a small table,
both had a coffee in front of them and Seth still didn’t know whether he should
speak to Dean. “So, Seth.” The older one started. “You still go to high school,
hm?” Seth nod. “For how much longer?”
“I have another year to go after this.” His voice was still a little quiet but
it helped that Dean was acting all normal now.
“What happens then?” Dean took his cup to drink from his coffee.
“Uhm.. I don’t know yet. I would like to do something concerning law maybe.”
Dean chuckled. “Yeah I can see you dressed up in a fancy suit reading the law
to a criminal.”
Seth smiled proudly. “Really? Thank you.” He hesitated. “Can I.. Also ask?”
The other man laughed at that. “I don’t know, Seth. Can you?” He put his cup
down and looked at the brunette with expecting eyes.
“Yeah.. Uhm.. How old are you?”
“I’m 24.” Ah, no wonder Dean was allowed in the bar. Seth had guessed 25 so he
wasn’t all mistaken. “My turn. Do your parents know you’re here?” Seth was
surprised by the question and slowly lowered and shook his head. “Hm.. So I
could take you to my home and kill you and no one would know it was me?”
Seth choked on the sip of coffee he was drowning and looked at Dean with scared
eyes. After all the up and down with his moods and the strange behavior Seth
wasn’t all too sure if Dean was joking. The dirty blonde however started
laughing loud. “Oh Seth!” He was holding his belly. “Stop looking at me like
that.” He could hardly speak through his laughter. “Stop it. Chill. I was
joking.” Seth tried to laugh but his mouth was still dry so nothing but an
insecure smile appeared on his face.
Slowly Dean calmed down from his heavy laughing. “Sugar, really. Ya got nothing
to worry about.. For now.” He winked at the younger male, making him look down
at his hands which were nervously fumbling around at the hem of his sweater.
“Seth?” A third voice joined the conversation. “Hey man, what’s up?” The
brunette turned his head to see who had approached them. It was his friend Cody
from school.
“Hi I-” Seth was cut off by Dean’s hand laying down on his thigh and squeezing
it hard. “Who are you?” Dean took over, his voice sharp and dangerous.
“Uh.. I-I’m a school fri-friend of Seth. We sit to-together in English. My na-
name is.. It’s Cody.” Cody looked intimidated and so did Seth.
“And what do you want?”
“No-nothing.”
“Well then get lost. Seth is busy.” Cody did as he was told without any further
questioning and Seth turned to look at Dean, who was still holding on to his
leg, in shock.
“Why did you do taht? He’s my friend?” Seth’s voice was a little shaking.
When Dean turned to look at him he smiled softly and his voice was so sweet,
Seth would surely get diabetes from it. “Because, my sweet Seth, I don’t want
to be interrupted on our first date.” The smile grew and dimples were showing
again as Dean reached out with his hand that wasn’t holding on to Seth, to push
some dark strands of hair behind his ear. “I wanna take my sweet time to get to
know you and if someone wants to interrupt my plans, well then I have to get
rid of them right?”
What? First date? Get rid of who? Sweet what? Too many things at once for Seth
to cope so he just nod in agreement. “Right..” He answered slowly.
Immediately Dean looked satisfied and leaned back in his chair. “See. We agree
so easily.” He raised his cup and emptied it. “Now, let’s see. Watcha doin this
weekend?” Seth was still caught up in what Dean had told him seconds ago that
he had a hard time following the conversation in the same pace as Dean pushed
it forward.”
“Weekend?” He asked as if he had never heard of such a thing.
“Yeah?” Dean raised his eyebrows to push for an answer.
“Uhm.. Studying I guess.”
The older male rolled his eyes. “Nah, that’s boring. You should come watch the
show on Friday. We can hang out after.” Woah, what? Seth blinked and felt his
breath picking up in pace along with his heartbeat. He already saw himself
sitting front row, arms raised in the air as he cheered for Dean but then
reality kicked in quickly.
“I don’t know..” He hesitated, didn’t want to tell Dean that he would have to
ask for permission and that he had no one driving him there and picking him up.
“Come on Seth. Don’t be boring.” The older male pushed.
“I..” He was getting a little mad at himself for feeling too shy to just say
it. Dean knew he was under age, so this shouldn’t be a huge surprise. “I want
to but.. I don’t think my parents would allow me to come.” There it was. He was
a giant baby. Seth braced for Dean to start laughing but the older male just
shrugged.
“Lemme speak to them?”
“What? NO!” Seth bursted out immediately. “No..” He said again more quiet as he
noticed that he had raised his voice. He was too embarrassed to even think of
Dean meeting his family.
“Well then propose me a better idea.” That didn’t make things easier. Seth was
struggling to find a better solution. He could sneak out again. That probably
wouldn’t go unnoticed a second time. He could just ask his Dad but he’d
probably ask Seth where he got free tickets from so he’d still have to mention
Dean. Maybe he could ask his brother? But Jeremy probably wouldn’t cover up for
him. Ugh, there was no other option in his mind. “I really want ya to come.”
Dean pressured for an answer as he saw Seth struggling to find an alternative.
His heart jumped at that. “Alright..” He muttered because he didn’t know what
else to do. Dean was just too convincing with his smile and the blue eyes. It
made him breathe quick.
“Great. I’ll meet them on thursday then?” Dean asked casually. Seth shrugged
and agreed.
“Okay.. But don’t put the blame on me if they act weird. My family is really
embarrassing.” Seth sighed as he thought of the way his brother always made fun
of him, his sister supporting that. His parents were nice, really nice, but
Jeremy and Abigail always got their way. He, as the middle born child, often
took back for them. One of the reasons for him to be so shy.
“Be glad ya got a fam, boy. Come on, finish ya coffee. We gotta get you home.”
Seth did as he was told but thought about what Dean had said as he drank the
dark liquid. Did he not have a family? Also.. How would he propose to his
family that they were having a guest over who was 7 years older than him and
wanted to hang out with their minor son at night after a wrestling show?
Seth was scared of the reaction this might cause but there was no back now. He
had already agreed to it.
***** Chapter 5 *****
Chapter Summary
     “Okay.. But don’t put the blame on me if they act weird. My family is
     really embarrassing.” Seth sighed as he thought of the way his
     brother always made fun of him, his sister supporting that. His
     parents were nice, really nice, but Jeremy and Abigail always got
     their way. He, as the middle born child, often took back for them.
     One of the reasons for him to be so shy.
     “Be glad ya got a fam, boy. Come on, finish ya coffee. We gotta get
     you home.” Seth did as he was told but thought about what Dean had
     said as he drank the dark liquid. Did he not have a family? Also..
     How would he propose to his family that they were having a guest over
     who was 7 years older than him and wanted to hang out with their
     minor son at night after a wrestling show?
     Seth was scared of the reaction this might cause but there was no
     back now. He had already agreed to it.
Chapter Notes
     Woah I'm impressed by myself. I never EVER updated this quick but
     reading your guys' comments, it made me want to continue so bad. I
     really hope this chapter is what you guys expected or should I hope
     it isn't? Anyway, have fun with this.
“See you around, Sugar.” Dean winked at Seth when the younger male climbed out
of the car. “Don’t forget to text me the time to come over.” And with that the
red Dodge Stealth howled loud and dashed off. The brunette just stood there and
looked after the car. How badly did he want to stay in the seat, how badly did
he want to ride home with Dean and learn everything about him. Seth’s cheeks
were still red from the blonde giving him a nickname once again. He wasn’t used
to it.
The smile remained on his face when he entered his home. “Hey, I’m back!” He
let his family know and went off to his room. There was still some time left
until they would eat dinner so Seth got busy with some homework. After half an
hour he gave up. Instead of algebra there was only Dean on his mind. His mood
swings were still slightly confusing but then again, Dean was so charming and
took care of him when needed. After all he could have taken advantage of the
teen being so drunk the other night but instead he’d taken him home without
trying anything and now he even wanted to meet his parents. Seth couldn’t
remember the last time he’d brought someone home to meet his parents. He rarely
hung out with new people, most of his friends he knew since middle school.
How should he tell his parents about the surprising visitor? While he was
thinking he started chewing on the back of his pencil that he had tried to draw
a graph with. Maybe he should just casually mention over dinner that he’d made
a new friend and he wanted to come over to introduce himself. But he just knew
from the bottom of his heart, his siblings would make a huge joke out of it.
“Seth?” His mother knocked on his door and entered. On light feet she came to
stand next to him where he was working on his homework. “Dinner is ready. Will
you be joining?”
“Yeah. I just want to finish this last task.” He was still just staring down at
the barely touched paper.
“Are you okay, Seth?” His mother was a professional when it came to sensing
that something was off. “Do you still feel a little sick? You know you can
still stay home for another day if you don’t feel well.”
“No, it’s not that.” Maybe telling her in private first would be easier.
“What is wrong?” She asked and started stroking over his long dark hair. This
she always did to calm him down. She’d done it when he was a baby and she still
did.
He took a deep breath and looked up into her kind eyes. “I made a new friend.
And he wants to come over to introduce himself on Thursday night.”
“Okay, that’s great. Why does it upset you?”
Now he looked down again. “I don’t think you will like him. And I don’t want
Jeremy and Abigail to make me look stupid in front of him.”
“I can’t speak for your siblings now but I’m sure your father and I will like
this boy. Why should we not?”
“Because he’s.. I don’t know he’s kinda older than me and you will think it’s
weird that he wants to hang out with me. It’s the same like with the girl
Jeremy brought back. You guys didn’t like her and she was only three years
older than him.”
His mother eyed him suspiciously. “We didn’t like that girl because she wasn’t
being polite as a guest. She spent all her time here, eating from our fridge,
driving our cars, without ever just offering a Thank You. Besides, how much
older can this boy be? Did you meet him in school?”
Now or never. There was no turning back now. “No.. I met him at the wrestling
show I went to with dad. He’s 24..” Seth tried to play the 8-year difference
off with an angel smile.
His mother’s facial expression showed how surprised she was. “24? Now.. I
really wasn’t expecting such a difference. Did your dad meet him too?”
Seth shook his head. “No he was outside at the car already.”
While Seth was waiting for her to say something he didn’t dare to look at her.
She would sure as hell say no and then he would have to disappoint Dean and
once again he would prove that he was still a huge baby. At the age of 16 he
still couldn’t decide on who he wanted to be friends with, who he wanted to
hangout with and the ‘when’ wasn’t his choice either. His fingers were fumbling
around with his pencil.
“You will understand that this is a little weird to me right now. This boy, or
should I say man, is quite older than you. But I appreciate that he wants to
introduce himself before just taking you out to places. That shows me that he
doesn’t have funny plans with my little angel.” She leaned down to place a kiss
on top of his head. “Is seven okay? Or should we start later?”
Before answering Seth jumped off his chair and hugged his mother so tight, she
probably couldn’t breathe for a moment. “Thank you, mom! Seven is perfect.” He
held on to her for a bit longer and she hugged him back happily.
“Okay, great. Now finish what you are doing so we can eat.” He nod immediately
and dropped down to his chair to finish what he had started. Suddenly math was
a lot easier.
 
                                      ---
                                        
When he came out of his room just a little later the rest of his family was
seated already. Seth joined quietly, softly smiling because he was still
appreciating the decision his mother made. They started eating and chatting for
a bit. “Steve, Seth’s friend will join us for dinner on Thursday. Do you think
you will be able to join us?” His mother asked across the table.
Before his dad could answer his older brother broke into loud laughter. “Seth
has a friend? And he wants to come over?” The laughter grew and as always
Abigail joined the oldest brother.
“Who is it?” She giggled brightly. “Your English teacher?” Both laughed loud
until his mother gave them a stern look.
“Leave your brother alone. Unlike you, Jeremy, he’s never brought home insolent
friends.” And just like that the laughter died. Thank god. After such a
wonderful day with Dean Seth would have hated for his good mood to die off
because of his siblings. His mother turned to look at him. “But you didn’t tell
me his name either. Who is he?” Her voice was softer now.
“His name is Dean. He works at FCW.” Seth answered. He would have loved to
spoil to his brother and sister that he had a friend who was older, cooler and
had made a name for himself in the world already. But he didn’t. Because he had
manners.
“At FCW?” His father now asked. “Did I meet him last weekend?”
“Uh.. Not really.” For now he decided not to tell his father that it was Jon
Moxley but again his parents could read his face like an open book. Seth really
needed to work on that.
“Are you sure about that? His dad dug deeper.
“Hm..” He was afraid of the reaction. “Jon Moxley.” He mumbled and looked down.
Instead of commenting on it Steve just gave his wife a worried look, clearly
telling her they would have a conversation with just the two of them later.
 
                                      ---
                                        
Time just wouldn’t pass once again. Wednesday seemed to be the longest day of
the whole week and Thursday wasn’t any better. Seth tried to distract himself
with his homework and some video games whenever time allowed him to. It was six
o’clock on Thursday when it was finally time to take a shower before Dean would
come to his home. He rubbed more conditioner than usually into his skull,
wanting to make his hair extra soft just in case Dean touched it. Which he
probably wouldn’t because they were hanging out with his family.
When he was done showering, Seth put on a black pair of tight jeans and a t-
shirt of A Day to Remember. He loved this shirt, regardless to it being
slightly too big. His hair fell loosely around his shoulders and he wore his
glasses too so he would be able to see properly what was going on. Even if he
didn’t want to admit it earlier to his parents when they had asked, he was
nervous about Dean showing up. Besides his siblings being brats the brunette
was also worried for Dean’s mood. What if the blonde showed up with that anger
in his eyes? His parents sure as hell would never let them hang out if they saw
him like that. With all these thoughts in his head he didn’t notice that he’d
been staring at the same spot on the wall for the past 15 minutes. Seth was
woken up from his trance as the doorbell rang.
Shit, he was too far away from the front door to possibly get there first.
Still, he jumped off his bed and ran towards the door. His father had opened it
already and Dean was standing in the hallway of the home. Seth stopped and
looked at him with his mouth hanging open a little. The blonde wore a light
blue colored dress shirt that hugged his muscular torso perfectly. He had fresh
jeans and biker boots on. The outfit was completed by the leather jacket he
wore the day before. But the real highlight was his hair. It was slicked back
instead of curling all over his head. The new hairdo revealed a silver earring
too. Had Dean worn that too the day before? Seth couldn’t tell and quite
frankly, he didn’t care either. The older man looked so damn sexy and that
without even trying probably. Now Seth felt a little bad for his casual look
and he wished he’d also put on a dress shirt.
“Hey, Seth.” Dean woke him for the second time in the past ten minutes and made
him swallow hard. The cocky smile on his face showed no dimples this time but
it wasn’t less charming.
“Hey.” Was all Seth brought out for now. Dean chuckled and his dad tried to
give him a somewhat encouraging smile.
“Are you going to take care of your guest, Seth?” He asked.
“Of course.” Finally the brunette moved, went to take Dean’s jacket from him
and put it on the hall-stand. His father seemed satisfied and left them alone
to go to the living room already. “You look really good.” Seth blushed as he
complimented Dean quickly before they would be joined by other people again.
The redness on his cheeks seemed to make Dean smile even more.
“Thanks, Seth.” Nothing happened for a minute but blushes and grins. “You gonna
ask me further inside or are we gonna have dinner here in the hallway?” The
older man laughed softly as Seth blushed some more.
“Of course not. Come.” He motioned for Dean to follow him into the kitchen
first. “Mom?” Seth asked and Jennifer turned to see why Seth was calling her.
When she saw Dean she dried her hands on a towel quickly and gave him a
welcoming smile. God bless his mother. She would make anyone feel welcome at
their home.
“Hello, Dean. Seth already introduced you.” She smiled as she went to shake his
hand.
“Has he? Well, I hope he told you nothing bad along my name?” There it was
again. That wide smile with the dimples. Seth’s legs would forever feel weak
because of that.
“You’ve got nothing to worry about. I’m Jennifer.” They shook hands for a
moment before letting go.
“It smells really good in here. Watcha makin, Jennifer?” Dean looked at all the
pots with huge interest. Seth just stood there awkwardly, wanting the
conversation to be over and drag Dean to his room to protect him from meeting
his siblings.
She turned around as if she had to check what she’d been preparing for the past
two hours. “Seth told me you do a lot of sports so I thought mashed potatoes
and chicken would be good for your diet. We have some red cabbage with that and
sauce of course. Does that please you?”
Again with the dimples and smiles. “Of course. I’m not a picky eater. Besides,
this food smells so good I believe I would love eating it even if I wasn’t a
fan of any of the ingredients. There is nothing better than a warm dish made by
mom. Right, Seth?” The taller man put his hand on Seth’s shoulder and petted it
for a moment. Dean was making his mother smile too. He got on her good side so
easily. Then again, Seth wasn’t too surprised. Nobody in this world could
resist this beautiful smile and those deep blue eyes.
She laughed softly. “Oh Seth, I already like your new friend. Dean, you’re
welcome to eat with us anytime if you keep up these kind of compliments.” Both
laughed at that. “Now, if you want to you can already sit at the table. Dinner
is going to be ready in just a minute.”
They did as they were told and went to meet Seth’s father again who had gotten
busy reading the newspaper. As they entered Steve put it down though. Dean eyed
the newspaper for a moment before looking to Seth’s dad. “Great game the
Buccaneers played there, right?” Again Seth was taken by surprise at how easily
Dean could start a conversation with his parents. The two older men immediately
dove into a conversation about football and Seth just stood there and watched.
Not for long though because his mother called for him and he got busy to set
the table and help her carry the food over.
“Will you two sit at the table now?” This time Jennifer was speaking to her
husband and to Dean. Seth was filling their glasses with water at that moment.
Still talking they came to sit and the brunette sat right next to Dean to make
sure none of his siblings would take that place.
The two unwelcomed teens entered the living room after Seth’s mother had called
them for dinner. They made quick work of introducing themselves without giving
Dean their hand. Jeremy sat next to Seth and his mother started filling the
plates. For now everything was going well and they started eating.
“So I think you like some other sports better than football, don’t you?” Seth’s
father asked.
“Yeah, I mean I’m livin ma dream.” As polite as Dean was, he didn’t even try
pronouncing all words properly. “Wrestling is probably the best typ’a sports
out there. Gets your heart beating fast, makes your muscles work just as much
as your brains. There’s no better workout than wrestling.”
“Maybe you should take Seth with you so he’d stop looking like a herring.”
Abigail giggled, Jeremy joined of course and Seth just ducked his head and
dared to look to the side to Dean. His eyes screamed the apology his sister
should have said.
“I think Seth looks pretty alright as he is. But if ya ever wanna get in the
ring of course you are welcome. Imma show you some tricks that make a herring
intimidating too.” He winked at the younger man. Immediately Seth’s face
brightened up. He, his parents and Dean laughed at that and Abigail gave Dean a
cold look. She didn’t like when her jokes weren’t appreciated.
“But talking about wrestling, how did you like the show, Steve?” It was so
funny to hear Dean speak to his parents like that, addressing them like he was
speaking to some good old friends.
“I have to admit, it was a lot of fun to watch. I expected nothing but plain
violence but it was far more than that. You tell quite catchy stories with your
characters.”
The dirty blonde seemed to be pleased with the answer and smiled proudly
between filling his mouth with some new food. After he’d swallowed it down he
spoke up again. “I was wondering whether you would mind if I invited Seth to
watch another show this weekend. I figured it would only be the right thing to
ask you directly instead of just taking him.” Across the table Seth could see
how pleased his parents were with Dean, how happy they were their middle child
had made such a nice new friend. “Of course I would be picking him up at home
and I will make sure he gets home save later that night again.”
“I don’t think there is a reason for the two of you not to hang out.” Jennifer
smiled happily. Steve seemed to be a little sceptic still.
“How long would this show go?” He asked.
“The show will be until ten. I would love for Seth to join my friends and I to
grab a snack after that.”
His dad seemed to think about it. Oh god, please? Seth’s face felt so hot and
he couldn’t shove another fork full of delicious food into his mouth because he
was nervous for his dad’s answer. What if he said no now? The night had been
going too well, this would be the turning point. Now Dean would see that he was
the baby in this family regardless to him not being the youngest.
Steve put down his fork and knife as he looked at Dean. “He needs to be home by
midnight. If you can stick to that, then I have no reason not to let the two of
you go.”
HA! Seth had called it be-.. Wait what? His dad had said yes? Immediately the
younger male looked up at his dad, wanting to kiss his face and say thank you
but he couldn’t because.. He was a grown up too, right? Hanging out with older
boys, being invited to a show and all?
Dean thanked him and they picked up to talk about the show again. Seth was
about to eat a fork full of red cabbage and mashed potatoes when Jeremy hit the
back of his head. “Careful!” He laughed but it was too late already. The food
had dropped from his fork to his chest down over his belly to his crotch and
was resting there on his jeans.
“Jeremy!” Seth called out loud in shock and quickly grabbed a napkin to clean
his crotch. “What the heck?!” He asked and looked up to gave his brother an
angry glare.
The older put up his hands up in defense. “Hey man, isn’t my fault you can’t
eat properly.” Abigail and Jeremy laughed loud. They had finished their plates
already.
“Hey!” His dad now spoke again. The voice of the oldest at the table was sharp.
“Get up and go to your rooms. Both.” There was no further discussion. Both got
up, still laughing but went away.
Seth looked back at Dean with wide eyes. “I’m so sorry.” He said softly and
then grabbed another napkin to clean off his chest as good as he could. The
teen was dying of embassament and even though there was still food on his plate
he was done eating. “Excuse me. I will go change quickly” He whispered, didn’t
look at Dean or his parents but quickly went to his room to get away from the
situation. It wasn’t polite, he knew that but he was too close to dropping a
tear than to sit there any longer. He hurried to his room and closed the door.
The second he was alone he took a deep breath, trying to swallow down the tears
of anger and embarrassment.
For a moment he didn’t even think about actually changing his clothes but he
fell on his bed, looking at the ceiling and trying to collect himself so he
could go back and make less of a deal of the situation but the truth simply
was, it was a huge situation for him. This was what he had been scared of all
along. Exactly this. His siblings making a fool out of him in front of Dean.
Seth felt like such a fucking loser. He wanted to cry but he needed to go back
so he rolled off the bed, looking for new clothes to put on.
As he was putting on his new shirt someone knocked on the door. “I’m almost
done, I will be back in a moment.” He tried to get rid of the person outside of
his room because he needed a little bit longer to get his emotions under
control again. The person who had knocked had other plans though and just
opened the door.
Oh. Dean entered his teenage bedroom. The tall man looked around for a bit. He
didn’t quite fit between the shelves filled with books and comics, the computer
and desk, the freshly made bed. As he was done checking out the room his eyes
focussed on Seth again. The younger male saw it immediately. There was this
little bit of anger, not fitting the charming smile on Dean’s face. “Not very
polite to leave us alone at the table, don’t you think?” His voice was sharp
now.
“I’m.. I’m sorry.” Seth stumbled through the short sentence, not sure what to
make of Dean’s appearance.
“Are you, Seth?” He came closer and Seth took a small step back. Dean stopped.
“Are you trying to get away from me?” The taller man seemed to be so dangerous
at that moment and stepped even closer to Seth until he younger male was in
reach and Dean extended his hand, placing it in the back of Seth’s neck. He
could pull him closer now. There was the couch to his hair! Right there! But
now it didn’t seem like Dean would care much about the conditioner used.
The dirty blonde leaned down so he could whisper into Seth’s ear. “There is no
getting away now, Seth.” Right away he knew that Dean referred to the good
relationship he had started to build with Seth’s parents. They would want to
see Dean again and besides this they had agreed to him joining Dean for the
show. His heartbeat was picking up, got so quick that he was sure Dean must
hear the pounding. He was scared because he didn’t understand Dean’s mood now
but then again, he didn’t want to get away from the other man either.
“I- I-..” He tried but failed.
Dean laughed and grabbed his neck a little harder. “You what, Seth?” There was
a change in his tone, almost like he was feeding on the tension in Seth’s body.
He sounded deeper now, rougher. Like he was enjoying to scare the teen.
“I don’t want to.. I don’t want to get away from you.” He finally managed to
say. For a little longer they remained in the position until Dean leaned in and
placed a soft kiss on the shell of Seth’s ear.
“Just what I thought.” He then whispered and stood up tall again, looking down
into Seth’s insecure eyes. The younger male was so caught up in the situation,
he hadn’t even noticed the kiss of Dean. For quite a bit Dean just looked into
the face of the brunette. It was almost like he studied every single part of
it. “You’re so pretty, Seth. Such a pretty and innocent boy. No wonder your dad
was so surprised when he first saw me.”
Woah, woah, woah. So many things at once again. Dean thought Seth was pretty?
Seth’s dad had been surprised? Why? He had seen Jon Moxley before? Things were
so confusing again. Regardless to these thoughts it wasn’t what Seth addressed.
“What makes you think I’m innocent?” He tried to protest.
Now Dean chuckled. “Come on, Seth. I have been in this game a lil bit longer
than you. Your eyes tell me everything I want to know.”
“My eyes don’t have a mouth so they can’t tell you anything.” Seth tried to
protest some more.
More chuckles left Dean’s mouth. “Alright. So you’re telling me that two days
ago when we went for coffee that wasn’t your first date.. Ever?” Seth shook his
head. A lie, but he didn’t want to give in. Dean saw right through him though
and gave him one of those cocky half smiles. “And if I was to kiss that pouty
pink mouth of yours, that wouldn’t be your first kiss?”
Now Seth was lost not only for words but he couldn’t even react with a gesture
anymore. His palms were getting sweaty quickly and his breath was getting
heavier. Eventually he managed to whisper a soft “No.”
Dean leaned down to lean his forehead against Seth’s and closed his eyes as he
took a deep breath. “Don’t lie to me, pretty boy.” Again a shift in his tone.
More demanding now, sharp and clean but quiet so it had a rather intimidating
effect on Seth. This was a voice his father would use on him if he broke his
curfew. Not that he ever had experienced that but he was sure it would be like
this. “Let’s try again. Would I be your first kiss?”
Seth’s voice was shaking now but he didn’t dare to lie again. “Ye-.. Yes.” He
whispered.
“See. That wasn’t too hard.” Now the voice was soft again. Dean leaned in just
a little bit more and Seth couldn’t believe what was happening, he wasn’t
ready! How did you kiss someone so ridiculously hot?! HOW?! His brain screamed
for help but apparently that wasn’t necessary anyway because Dean didn’t kiss
him. Instead he let go of Seth and stood up tall again. The dirty blonde smiled
at the younger male. “I should get going.” He announced.
Noooooo, no, no no-ho, no-hell-no! “Okay..” Seth’s head and mouth didn’t seem
to work together now. He was still caught up in almost kissing Dean. The older
man could probably sense it but he didn’t address it so together they went to
the front door. Seth’s parents joined. Jennifer had packed up some leftovers
for Dean and his dad checked in with the time Dean would pick up Seth. The
blonde was already out of the door before Seth could properly speak again. Just
as the door was about to close Dean winked at Seth.
What the hell had this evening been? Seth felt exhausted and was glad his mom
didn’t ask him to help cleaning the table. He needed to sleep. Needed to gather
all possible energy for tomorrow when Dean would come back to pick him up.
***** Chapter 6 *****
Chapter Summary
     Noooooo, no, no no-ho, no-hell-no! “Okay..” Seth’s head and mouth
     didn’t seem to work together now. He was still caught up in almost
     kissing Dean. The older man could probably sense it but he didn’t
     address it so together they went to the front door. Seth’s parents
     joined. Jennifer had packed up some leftovers for Dean and his dad
     checked in with the time Dean would pick up Seth. The blonde was
     already out of the door before Seth could properly speak again. Just
     as the door was about to close Dean winked at Seth.
     What the hell had this evening been? Seth felt exhausted and was glad
     his mom didn’t ask him to help cleaning the table. He needed to
     sleep. Needed to gather all possible energy for tomorrow when Dean
     would come back to pick him up.
Chapter Notes
     Yeeeeeees UPDATE! Before you start reading this I just want to warn
     you that we start getting deeper into Dean's issues now. Be prepared
     for that roller coaster of emotions. I guess if you're still reading
     by now There's no way out for you anway.
     Also, I wanna thank my friend Nay who helped me plot for this
     chapter. GO VISIT HER TUMBLR wasistdean.tumblr.com and don't forget
     to enjoy this chapter.
     Lastly, I have no idea about Football or gaming, really. Please bear
     with me if the stuff I say doesn't make too much sense?! IM TRYING TO
     MAKE IT AS REALISTIIC AS POSSILE! I also apologize for possible
     spelling mistakes. I admit that I didn't have the patience to double
     check for spelling mistakes.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
“Come on Steve you know they stand no chance!” Seth tried to be patient. Dean
and his dad had been talking about sports news for the past twenty minutes
while Seth had gotten barely any attention of the hot blonde male. “Listen,
let’s bet $10 on this. Tampa stands no chance against the Bengals. I’ve been
bidding on Cincinnati for years and whenever I put my money on them they didn’t
disappoint me.” Steve laughed and nod. He agreed to the deal and both of them
decided to continue their sports talk when the match had happened. Finally,
because Seth had been about to go back to his room and get busy with something
he considered less boring. “Ya ready to go?” Dean finally turned to look at him
instead of his father.
“Yes, I am!” Seth was dressed in a grey pair of skinny jeans and Vans that went
well with his Jon Moxley merchandise. Dean had complimented it the minute they
had gotten inside for a moment because Seth’s mother had offered Dean a glass
of water. Today the teen wore his hair open, dark locks falling down on his
shoulders wildly.
“Alright.” the taller male smiled and poked his head into the living room,
smiling charmingly. “I will bring him back in time. Good night, Steve and Jen.”
While Dean was telling his parents goodbye Seth put on his jeans jacket and
together they left the house to sit in the red Dodge Stealth. “Open the glove
compartment. You can pick one of the CDs.” Dean had already started the car and
Seth did as he was told. The older male was probably still a little annoyed
from when Seth had been switching around with the stations too much.
When Seth got out the three CDs from in there he recognized only one cover. It
was an album of Deftones which he liked but didn’t listen to too often. Rather
than wanting to upset Dean again by choosing a CD he might not like, Seth threw
it into the player and smiled satisfied when he recognized the first song.
“You like Deftones?” Dean asked in his rough voice. There was so much charm in
it and when Seth turned his head to look at him he still couldn’t believe he
was hanging out with such a handsome man. Dean looked like the bad boy every
good girl, or boy, dreamed off. Blonde locks fell into his forehead, his black
sweater seemed well worn, jeans had holes at their knees again. One of his
hands was resting on the wheel, the other one on his own leg.
“Uh, ya. I don’t know too much music of them but they’re okay.” Seth hoped it
was the right answer and that he wouldn’t upset Dean like he’d done two days
ago.
“They are okay?” Dean chuckled. “Dude, they are like.. Probably the best band
out there. If ya wanna keep driving around with me ya better get used to them.”
Seth definitely wanted that. “Here, lemme show ya my favorite song of’em.” Dean
skipped a couple of songs until he could turn on a track called Root. Seth
loved how Dean’s fingers started drumming on the wheel as they listened to the
song.
“Yeah, it’s pretty good.” Seth admitted but he was more caught up in Dean. He
wasn’t even bothered when the dirty blonde grabbed a cigarette and lit it while
driving. The whole car started to smell of the smoke because the blonde had
rolled down the window on his side only a little bit. The sexyness of Dean was
making Seth’s teenage brain a little fuzzy and there were butterflies filling
his stomach. It was still unbelievably to him what was happening. Everything he
did with Dean was exciting to him and for now they had barely done anything
special.
 
Together they arrived at the arena quicker than Seth liked it. When the car was
parked he got ready to get out it but Dean put his hand on Seth’s thigh. Seth
turned back his head to meet blue orbs with his own brown eyes. The older male
looked at him for a bit before he spoke with that raspy voice again. “What have
ya been looking at the whole ride?”
Immediately Seth blushed deeply. He wouldn’t have thought he was being that
obvious. “Uhm.. Nothing.” He tried to play it off but by now he already knew
Dean wouldn’t let it slip like this. To no surprise Dean squeezed his thigh.
“Come on, Seth. We’ve been at this point already.”
Seth took a deep breath and looked down to where the large hand rested on his
leg. “I.. I don’t know. You looked very.. Handsome.” Without looking at Dean
Seth heard the small laugh and felt ashamed immediately. “Sorry.” He added and
opened the car door because he wanted to escape the embarrassing situation.
Dean had other ideas and held on to Seth’s leg tightly. “Close the door.” He
demanded. “I have something for you, pretty boy.” There was still amusement in
Dean’s voice and Seth decided he liked that better than when this aggressive
tone was the consequence of him doing something that Dean didn’t like.
“For me?” Seth asked softly, too shy to ask what it was. There was no need for
that anyway. Dean used his free hand to go for Seth’s chin and force him to
look at him again. The blue eyes seemed more encouraging and were filled with
passion more than amusement now.
“Come here.” Dean had lowered his voice too and pulled Seth closer by his chin.
Ohh, no! NO! What was happening? Dean leaned in and their faces were so close
now, like.. Woah so close. Seth was able to feel Dean’s hot breath on his face
and opened his mouth to ask what Dean was doing but before a tone could leave
his mouth their lips met. The eyes of the younger male were wide open and he
was sure he would ruin this, ruin their first kiss, ruin HIS first kiss. But
Dean seemed to sense it and instead of pulling back he moved his hand from
Seth’s chin to the back of his head, grabbed a fist full of dark locks and
pulled Seth’s face a little closer.
When he started moving his lips against Seth’s the younger male was lead on by
that and followed the movements of the other male’s mouth. Eventually his eyes
closed and he let himself drown in the sweet and bitter taste of Ambrose who
didn’t give the teen too much time to adjust to the new feeling. Instead he
didn’t hesitate to roll his tongue into Seth’s mouth. Now the brunette could
properly taste Dean and a hint of cigarette smoke that was still lasting in his
mouth.
Before Seth could be as passionate with the kiss as Dean was, the blonde pulled
back and left Seth with his mouth standing slightly open. The expression on the
older man’s face was full of pride. He’d just taken another one of Seth’s
firsts .
His glasses had been pushed back far on his nose by the kiss and the windows
were a little steamed up which drew a laugh from Dean again. “Ya should clean
that up so we can get inside.” To Seth it was such a mystery how Dean could do
something so bold a second ago and now act like nothing happened. They just
shared their first kiss. Hello? This was special? He was still a little frozen
in his position which made Dean’s grin grow even more. However, the blonde
didn’t address it anymore and already got out of the car.
 
Inside Dean organized Seth a free drink, woah beer, before their ways parted
for until the show would be over. “Imma pick you up at the merch stand. Just
wait. I’ll be quick once the show is over.” He’d said before leaving to get
changed.
The show was a huge success. Seth was on edge the whole time, lost in each
match and applauding and joining chants.
 
                                      ---
                                        
“Do you want to buy a shirt?” Seth turned his head to the lady standing behind
the merchandise table. She was really beautiful with her long hair and bright
eyes. He had been standing next to the table for good 30 minutes since the show
was over and all other guests had left already. The girl probably wanted to
close the stand.
“Oh, sorry. No I’m just waiting for Dean.” He apologized and the lady seemed
surprised. She opened her mouth to say something, eyes now looking him up and
down a little more critically but she never got to say her words because a
large hand laid down on Seth’s shoulder and he looked over it to See Dean
standing there. His hair was wet, probably from a shower, and there was a red
spot on his jaw where he had been kicked in the face during his match. Even
like that he looked unbelievable hot and Seth, once again, felt like a little
kid next to this beautiful tall man.
“What rumors has April been putting in your head, sweet cheeks?” Seth looked
back at the lady who had raised her eyebrows at them. Or more at Dean.
“I didn’t say a word.” She shrugged and went on to clear the table. Dean pulled
Seth away towards the exit.
“What was that about?” Seth asked in an insecure tone. He felt judged and
already made up his mind to never be able to return to the arena because this
girl, April, seemed to think something negative of him.
“Don’t worry about her. She is a little crazy and likes to work up people.”
They sat in the car together. “How did you like the show?” Dean switched the
topic as he started the car. This time Seth made sure not to stare.
“I loved it. I wish I could come here every friday to watch you.. And the
other’s.” He didn’t want to sound like an obsessed little boy but truth was, he
wanted to come and see the dirty blonde fight. His matches had this crazy vibe
that captured his attention to easily.
“Maybe I will have to talk to your parents again then.” Dean laughed as they
continued the drive. It didn’t take too long for them to get downtown. Right,
they were going to meet Dean’s friends to grab something to eat. Now that Seth
remembered that he started getting a little nervous. What if the other people
reacted to him like April just had? He would probably make them uncomfortable.
Maybe he should ask Dean to just drop him off at home already.
As he was about to work up the courage to do so they had already arrived
downtown. Both got out of the car and Seth looked to his left and right for a
moment as he waited for Dean to grab his jacket from the back seat. “Watcha
lookin around all nervous?” Ops, he hadn’t noticed the dirty blonde was already
done.
“All good. Just.. A little excited to meet your friends.” Dean chuckled. Once
again he was able to read the teen like an open book. He didn’t comment on the
insecure boy and just rested his hand on his lower back to push him forward
towards the restaurant.
They entered a country style steak house. Some John Denver music was playing
and the waitresses, all in short jeans skirts and white t-shirts, wore cowboy
boots on their feet as they took care of the guests. All furniture was made of
wood and there was a pool table at one side of the room. “They’re already
here.” Dean pushed Seth further into the restaurant and they made their way
over to a table with three other men sitting there. “Hey there!” The dirt
blonde let go of Seth and went to greet the three men with long dark hair. Seth
only remembered one of them, Leakee, which probably wasn’t his real name. The
teen stood there awkwardly for a bit while the four exchanged fist bumps and
threw a couple of jokes back and forth. Eventually Dean turned back on him.
“Brought ma new friend, boys. This’s Seth.”
A shy smile appeared on his face and he reached out his hand to offer each man
a hand shake. The two men he didn’t know introduced themselves as Jimmy and
Jay. They were twins and appeared a little goofy which Seth liked. It made him
feel a little less unsure. “I’m Roman. But I think we met in The Cave the other
night, right?” Right away his face turned into a big red ball, blush creeping
down his neck too. Quickly Seth nod and looked down. He remembered too well how
Roman’s fight sight of him had been the teen pressing his face to the window of
the bar. Yey, great first impression.
The huge dark haired male seemed to pick up on Seth’s embarrassment immediately
and, thank god, didn’t address it any further. Dean and Seth set down and were
offered a menu quickly. Without asking Dean ordered beer for everyone. “Dean..
You know I can’t drink.” Seth had waited for a moment of the others talking to
remind the blonde that he was under age still.
“Don’t worry so much.” He just rolled his eyes and went on to study the menu.
Seth had already picked and looked around in the restaurant to be doing
something without annoying anyone. Of course he wouldn’t have minded starting a
conversation but he felt too shy to just jump on to what the three men were
talking about.
The waitress had just gotten them some drinks, Dean was still busy, when Roman
addressed him. “So what do you do when you don’t watch wrestling.” His voice
was deep and nice, making Seth feel more welcome now.
“Uhm..” Wow smart start for a sentence. “I go to school. Yeah that’s what I do
everyday.” Good impression, hell ya. Smart boy. Baby boy. Wow. Seth took a deep
breath to calm down. Roman didn’t appear to judge him, he looked curious and
like he was seriously interested in hearing from Seth. “And.. I like comics and
video games.”
“Video games? Love those. Have you played  Thief ?” Well Seth had not expected
that.
Immediately he nod. “I did. I loved that game. Took me quite a while to figure
it out though.”
“LIsten, I’m on it right now and I have to admit I’m getting a little impatient
with this game.” The two of them dove right into their conversation about the
game, Seth advising Roman on what to do without providing spoilers too much so
the Samoan would still have something to figure out. They were only interrupted
by the waitress coming along to take their orders. When that was done Dean
joined the conversation.
“What was this thing the two of you were talking about?” He asked curiously.
“Oh it’s this video game. You play a thief that..”
Roman interrupted Seth. “Don’t even bother, Seth.” He was chuckling. “Dean
doesn’t get any of this. He has no patience for technology at all.”
With questioning eyes Seth looked at Dean who just shrugged. “Doesn’t catch my
attention at all. Always been a boy to do these things in real life. ‘s a lot
more fun.” He winked at Seth who started blushing again. Until dinner was
served Seth, Dean and Roman had been gotten into a conversation about
wrestling.
“It just sucks that they want to add this chick to my story line. I don’t get
along with her at all.” Roman shook his head. Even when displeased he didn’t
seem mean or angry. Maybe it was because the steak in front of him looked so
delicious that it took away the negative energy with ease.
Seth had already stuffed his mouth with some fries and swallowed them quickly
to answer. “My mom always says that I don’t have to like the people from school
but I have to be able to work with them as long as it is necessary. And then
she says something like ‘suck it up’ but in a nice was.” He giggled. The beer
had made him relax around the older men again and he wasn’t too embarrassed to
speak up anymore.
Both, Roman and Dean, huffed at that. “That sound something my mom would tell
me but she wouldn’t be so nice about it.” Roman laughed some more. Seth was so
relieved that he got along with Dean’s friend this well. The twins were also
nice but they were occupied with teasing each other for the most time. The food
also tasted good and soon all plates were empty and all bellies were filled up.
“Imma step outside for a smoke. Ya coming Seth?” The youngest male at the table
wanted to say no because he was enjoying his conversation with Roman a lot but
Dean’s eyes were demanding so he got up without and answer and followed him in
front of the door. He wrapped his arms around his skinny body, ugh he should
have taken his jacket. “Like seeing ya get along with Roman so well.” Dean’s
voice was a bit of a mumble because he had put the cigarette between his lips.
“Yes he is really nice. He made me feel very welcome.” A soft smile built on
Seth’s face and he watched as Dean was smoking his cigarette. “Maybe next time
I will have to help him with the game again.” Seth giggled and almost missed
that Dean stopped smiling completely.
“Next time?” Woah. At the new tone Seth did finally notice. Dean’s blue eyes
started staring down the younger male and Seth swallowed hard. The whole
expression on the other male’s face got so hard and cold and the teen felt his
eyes growing bigger and a little fear crawling up his neck. When Dean got like
this he didn’t exactly know how to deal with that. Apparently he was right to
be scared because Dean grabbed for his wrist and god was his hold strong. The
teen tried to pull back his hand but the stronger man held on hard, making his
lower arm hurt so Seth winced softly. Cold eyes were still staring him down. “I
decide when you meet me or my friends again. Not you. Got that? This happens on
my terms.”
Seth didn’t understand where this was coming from buthe nod quickly, so hard
that he almost lost his glasses. Again he tried to pull away his hand because
Dean was really hurting him but he didn’t stand a chance. “Dean.. It hurts.
Please let go.” His shaky voice was just a whisper as he looked back at the
other male. He didn’t let go for a little bit longer but when he did he dropped
his cigarette to the floor.
“Back inside. Sit at the table I’m going to the bathroom.” Dean didn’t give him
much attention now but Seth was glad to go back inside. He was holding his
hurting wrist with his good hand as he returned to the table alone, eyes still
filled with terror, his mind occupied to force back some tears of shock and
pain.
When he came back to the table he was glad Roman was sitting there alone. The
Samoan immediately gave him some feeling of security back. Jimmy and Jay were
playing pool now. “Are you alright?” Roman looked at him and raised one
eyebrow. Seth was so scared to ask but he was even more scared to wait until
Dean came back and look at him again.
Quickly he answered as he nod. “Yes, uh.. Would you..” His voice was still
shaking and not doing what he wanted. “Could you, maybe, please, drive me
home?” He was looking at the door like he would run out there any second and in
case Roman said no maybe he would do exactly that.
“Isn’t Dean getting you home?” Roman asked.
“Right.” Seth answered but grabbed his jacket already. He’d rather walk home
than wait for Dean. He feared the anger of the other male. “Just tell him I
left already. I will walk.”
“No, wait. I can drive you. But don’t you wanna say goodbye?”
Seth shook his head and already had his jacket on. He was relieved when Roman
didn’t ask further questions, only told his cousins he’d be back in a bit. The
tall Samoan paid for the food for all five men before they left for outside. He
lead Seth to the car. Sitting inside Seth felt a little better, less scared and
when Roman started the car and drove off the parking lot his heart beat started
to beat a bit more like it should again. For quite a while Seth and Roman
exchanged nothing but road directions but eventually the Samoan broke the
silence. “Look.. Dean, he isn’t easy and you’re a really sweet guy. I’m not
gonna ask you what happened outside, I can kinda guess because I know him for
long. He’s one of my closest friend but, without wanting to insult you, you’re
a small dude so if he does something that upsets you, you can call me. Maybe I
can help you to make him calm down. It’s not easy, I know that.”
The student looked at the Samoan for a moment before he dared to smile softly.
“That is really kind. Thank you.” While they were still driving Roman told Seth
his number so he could put it in his phone. A little later they arrived at
Seth’s house and he stayed in the car for another moment. “I’m.. Ehm.. Thank
you. I hope he won’t be mad at you now.” His eyes were full of apologies.
“Don’t worry about me. He won’t dare to mouth off. Have a good night. See you
around, Seth.”
 
Seth closed his door after he’d told his parents good night. They had waited
for his return and were pleased he was even half an hour early. Yey, another
good impression of Dean for them. As soon as the teen was alone in the dark of
his room he rolled up into his blanket, tried to get warm. His wrist was
slightly hurting still and he dared to wrap his hand around where Dean had
touched him earlier.
He felt his eyes heating up, tears coming. Now that he was alone he didn't have
to hold them back anymore. Soft sobs left the boy as he tried to hide his face
into his pillow. Why had Dean done that? It really wasn’t a bad thing he’d
said. After all it was a compliment, right? He wanted to hang out more with
Dean. Why wasn’t he happy? Earlier that night when they had kissed Seth had
been so sure that Dean did like him but maybe the older male had just done it
for fun. He seemed to enjoy putting Seth in uncomfortable situations, fed off
the distress the teen felt every now and then. Between his sobs Seth grabbed
for his own chest. His heart hurt behind his ribs and he couldn’t do anything
against it. He was crushing on Dean so hard but the older male kept scaring him
too. Without knowing what to make of the situation Seth fell asleep with soft
sobs choking him.
 
                                      ---
                                        
Seth was glad he and his dad had been busy in the backyard all day. Steve liked
gardening in order to free his mind from work and Seth loved helping his
father. Now that it was early in the year they had started cleaning out the
beds from weeds so they could put new seeds into the ground soon. When the teen
had woken up that morning he was still upset about last night but he didn’t
want to let it show to his family. Instead he was his usual quiet and decided
to join his father for the activity. Sunday went by the same way.
Now, he was exhausted and ready to go to sleep. He would have to get up early
the next morning for school so Seth was getting into bed but was hold back when
his phone went off on his desk. Maybe it was Cody calling him to tell him he
wouldn’t be coming to school tomorrow. The teen walked over to see who was
calling. Oh. It was Dean.
He hesitated to pick up, the memory of last night was still thick in his head
but he couldn’t not pick up either. “He-Hello?” He answered the phone.
“Hey, pretty boy.” The rough voice was full of charms and sweetness now. “How
are you doing? Got some rest after last night? I hope Rome didn’t try anything
funny in the car?” Dean laughed and Seth didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t
believe Dean was full of jokes and laughs while he had been hurt and upset
since they parted ways.
“What?” Was all he could answer in disbelieve.
“You heard me, babe.” Dean was still chuckling.
“Uhm..”
“Ah come on. Are you okay?” He asked again.
“I guess..” Seth answered but didn’t ask back.
“Great, I’m glad to hear. Listen, sugar, I had a bit of a busy day so I
couldn’t call earlier. Sorry about that. I’ll make it up to you tomorrow. Let’s
hang out. We could go for coffee again?” What? Dean was apologizing for calling
late in the day but not for almost breaking Seth’s wrist. That didn’t even make
sense! Nothing about Dean made any sense at all and Seth wanted to scream at
Dean to stay the hell away from him because really, Dean was scaring Seth so
much. “You still there, pretty boy?” Seth had not answered yet.
Even though he was so scared he could barely resist Dean’s sweet voice, the
sweet nicknames so instead of saying anything he quickly hung up, turned off
his phone and hid in his bed.
 
                                      ---
                                        
When Seth had gotten up in the morning he’d felt better. He was proud to resist
Dean and stay away from the dangerous man. This really wasn’t his world, he
wasn’t made for that. He had learned that for good last night and regardless to
his parents asking when Dean would come visit again he promised himself not to
go back there. It had only been their fourth time meeting and each time Seth
had not been able to please Dean, resulting in him getting upset or scared. It
was probably better to cut off the contact even though it was incredibly hard.
When he had turned on his phone this morning there had been 16 calls of Dean
and a couple of messages asking him to pick up. The teen had ignored all, he
was too scared of what would happen if he did pick up. Dean would probably be
angry again and that made him not only scared but also feel bad about himself.
He was shy not stupid but absolutely unable to cause this swing of moods Dean
kept showing.
Two hours of biology were a great way to start his day and make him forget the
unanswered calls. The longer Seth was in school that day, the more he found
truth in when people told their best friend in movies to go outside and do
things instead of staying home and cry over boys. He hadn’t told anyone about
Dean, nobody but Cody had ever seen him with Seth before. That was also good
because now he didn’t need to explain to anyone how the wrestling show went.
“Let’s meet on wednesday for the project, okay?” Cody asked as they were
leaving school together. They had not been in the same class at the end of the
day but sometimes they rode the same bus back home, depending on whether Cody
was going to his mom’s or dad’s place.
“Yeah that is a good idea. Until then we can both read the chapters from the
book already.” Seth agreed. Together they were walking towards the bus when
Seth heard someone calling his name. He stopped and turned his head.
Immediately he found who was calling him. There was no way he could miss that
mop of blonde lock between the much shorter other students. “Seth!” Dean called
out again. He swallowed hard. Alright, Dean had stalked him down to school,
waited for him to come out and was jogging towards him now. That was normal,
right? Totally.. Yeah, totally not.
“Cody, I’m sorry but I think you should go catch the bus I think.. This will
take a moment.” He turned back towards his friend. Even though he just wanted
to walk away with him he knew there was no away now that Dean was here. Cody
looked at him critically for a moment but not and went towards the bus stop
while Seth turned around to look at Dean again who was now almost in front of
him. In one hand the older man held a bouquet of flowers.
“Hey, there you are.” Dean smiled at him, showing off his dimples that he knew
Seth loved. It forced the younger male to also smile softly even though he
didn’t want to. “I’ve been trying to reach you all night and day. Why aren’t
you picking up your phone?”
Seth already knew there was no chance on earth he could say the right thing
here. “I.. I..” He was lost for words. There was no excuse that wouldn’t sound
like a lie so he just shrugged. There was no answer.
“Anyway, I’m glad I found you.” Dean smiled some more and reached out to cup
Seth’s face so the shorter male would finally look at him. The blue eyes were
full of life and seemed sincere. “I brought you flowers. Thought they’d
probably make up for whatever.” Did Dean really not know why Seth had been
ignoring him. The teen took the flowers and looked at them a little lost for
what to do now.
“Thanks.” Was all he answered.
“You’re very welcome. Come on, let me give you a ride home.” Dean put his hand
on Seth’s back, rubbing it with his large hand for a moment as if he was trying
to sooth Seth. It worked, it convinced the teenager to give in slowly.
Fear went away at the soft touch, making it easier to look at Dean again. “You
don’t have to, Dean. I can just take the bus.” Seth managed to smile softly but
the taller male shook his head.
“Nah, come on. I already stopped by your parents and told them I’d be over for
coffee.” Seth wasn’t sure whether he liked the idea of Dean going to his home
when he was looking for him. He’d really hunted the teen down and it made him a
little uncomfortable still but one look at the bright smile at Dean’s face and
the tall man had won him over. Together they went to sit in the car and when
Seth looked at the flowers again now the butterflies returned to his stomach.
Chapter End Notes
     Woah so that was one hell of a ride, right? What do all of you think?
     Should Seth stay away from Dean? Or is Dean going to keep his temper
     now that he noticed Seth couldn't handle that? Also, how sweet is
     this whole Roman/Seth thing? Guys, be so kind and leave a comment to
     let me know what you think!
***** Chapter 7 *****
Chapter Summary
     Fear went away at the soft touch, making it easier to look at Dean
     again. “You don’t have to, Dean. I can just take the bus.” Seth
     managed to smile softly but the taller male shook his head.
     “Nah, come on. I already stopped by your parents and told them I’d be
     over for coffee.” Seth wasn’t sure whether he liked the idea of Dean
     going to his home when he was looking for him. He’d really hunted the
     teen down and it made him a little uncomfortable still but one look
     at the bright smile at Dean’s face and the tall man had won him over.
     Together they went to sit in the car and when Seth looked at the
     flowers again now the butterflies returned to his stomach.
Chapter Notes
     Quick update again! I'm so surprised by myself but this story has
     taken over my thoughts for days now and I should be preparing for
     exams instead of plotting what to do with these two boys! I hope you
     enjoy this chapter as much as the last one.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
The two of them were sitting on the couch in the living room with Seth’s
parents. Jennifer had baked some cake which tasted delicious. To Seth’s
surprise Dean was stuffing his face like crazy with the sweet dish. Considering
he was earning his money with his body he would have thought the dirty blonde
would be more careful what he ate but apparently he swallowed down everything
he could get. While doing so he loved talking. Mouth full or not, he wasn’t
bothered.
“It was interesting because when I first got into wrestling I didn’t know
either and when I told Seth that my real name is not Jon and I saw the surprise
in his face I thought I was looking at myself just a couple of years back.”
They all laughed. Even Seth.
For now he was still a little uncertain about the whole situation. Dean was so
off. Sometimes, like right now, his mood was so good. He seemed to love the
world and was at peace with his life. And then, from one second to another, he
was possessed by the devil. Just the thought of the blue eyes staring at him
with no emotion made Seth grab his wrist and swallow hard. He wore a hoodie
today which covered his wrist even though it wasn’t big and dark there was a
blueish print on his skin where Dean had grabbed him last night.
“Yes, the first time I was standing in a ring I was sure I never wanted
something else in my life.” Seth joined to listen to Dean talking again.
“Wrestling has a positive effect for several reasons on people I guess. For me
it always offered some kind of relief. Anyway, now that we are talking about
wrestling and all, Imma take Seth with me again on friday. Things went well
last week so it’s okay, right?”
Jennifer and Steve seemed to be glad Dean was taking Seth outside the house so
they agreed immediately. “Also my friends and I are having dinner at my place
this friday and I was curious whether you’d allow Seth to sleep over? We plan
on..” Wait what? Seth thought he hadn’t heard right. Sleep over? At Dean’s
place? WHAT?!
“Sleep what?” He cut into Dean who was still talking.
“Sleepover.” Dean looked at him confused as if Seth had asked him what time it
was on mars. “Don’t you remember? I asked you on the drive here if you’d be up
for it and you said you’d love to.” What was Dean even talking about? They had
not had this conversation. During their drive here Seth had been talking about
school only and Dean had coated him up in sugar sweet words.
“Seth it’s okay.” Now his confused eyes turned towards his mother who gave him
an understanding look. How was he the only one not understanding the situation.
“You can sleep over at Dean’s place. You know you don’t have to be afraid to
ask us that. You don’t need to use your sister’s techniques.” Oh no, hell no!
Seth was not acting like his sister at all!
Abigail was that kind of girl who would tell her friends to ask their parents
whether she could stay at a friend’s place because she thought their parents
would say yes more easily if it wasn’t her asking. But Seth wasn’t doing that!
He was 100% sure that Dean had not asked him about this.
“Great, so it’s settled.” Dean agreed and smiled, showing off his dimples once
more. So handsome.. Seth was losing track of his thoughts about the situation
again when Dean looked at him. The look the older male was giving him was so
dreamy, Seth couldn’t stop looking back. His parents seemed to notice.
“I have to get ready for work. Jen, can you help me out real quick? Can’t seem
to find my black apron.” Seth’s dad was a chef and with this excuse the two
left the room. Seth was still staring at Dean but he slowly got back to his
thoughts from a minute ago.
He frowned a little to clear his head completely. “Dean.. What is all this
about?” He asked in a quiet voice. The teen felt insecure and didn’t know how
to interpret the things Dean was doing. Did he want to have Seth around or was
he annoyed by his presence? It was a new 50/50 chance each day. “You really
didn’t ask me that in the car.” Now he forced himself to look down to his
nervously fumbling fingers. He was still afraid of Dean’s reaction to when he
asked questions now.
Instead of getting an answer he felt a hand with rough skin wrap around his
chin and when he was forced to look up again he was greeted by a warm smile. “I
wanted to surprise you.” Dean admitted and put his free hand on Seth’s thigh
softly. The teen wasn’t sure whether to jerk away or accept the touch. He did
the first because the big hands of the older male felt warm and protective and
they pulled Seth a little bit closer. “Look.. I know I lost my temper a little
the other night. I didn’t mean to.” Dean’s voice was a bit lower now as if he
wanted to avoid people hearing him speak. “I will explain when we have some
alone time, okay? Can that be enough for now? Because I don’t want these eyes
to give me that insecure look whenever I touch you.”
Now Dean ran his hand from Seth’s chin into the dark hair to run his fingers
through it and untangle it a little, making it even more curly. “I want you to
give me that shy smile with this sweet mouth.” He leaned in a little bit more
and Seth could feel his heart jumping in his chest at the sweet words. “And I
really want to kiss you everytime I see that smile.” The voice of the other
male was only a whisper now and their faces were so close that Seth and Dean’s
noses were almost touching. “You think I can, Seth?”
The teen swallowed hard. His skin felt too hot and his throat too dry. An ice
cold shower sounded good right now. “Y-yes..” He whispered back.
Dean took a deep, very deep breath and groaned a little when he released, his
eyes closed during that. “Oh Seth.. Such a good boy. You’re always so good for
me.” Now the older male came close enough to steal a soft peck from Seth’s
mouth. “The fucking best boy I’ve ever met.” Again he leaned in for the short
touch. “I’m going to take you home with me.” Another kiss. “And I will..”
Another kiss. “Make you enjoy a weekend..” Another kiss. “Like you’ve never
enjoyed one before.” And this time when their mouths met Dean didn’t pull back.
He held on to Seth’s hair and kissed him softly for a moment. Unlike in the car
the other day, this kiss wasn’t hungry or demanding. It was soft and warm and
almost made Seth whimper.
His heart was hammering against his chest from the inside and Seth dared to put
his hands on Dean too, one to his side and the other one firsting his shirt
where Dean’s chest was. He held on to him as they kissed for a moment but they
were interrupted when there were steps in the hallway. Dean probably couldn’t
care less but Seth felt shy about kissing in front of his parents so he pulled
back and shyly smiled at Dean with apologies in his eyes. The older male just
winked at him and got up from the couch as well, stretched and then looked back
at Seth.
“So, sweet cheeks, I have some business to do this week. I will pick you up on
friday around four, we gotta get to arena a bit earlier than last week because
I have to sign some t-shirts or some bullshit, I don’t know. Just make sure
you’re ready.”
By now Seth had also gotten up and Dean turned around full body to look at him
again, giving him a cheeky grind. The dirty blonde reached out and put his hand
in Seth’s neck to pull the teen in for another moment, stealing another kiss,
this time open mouthed so he could get some of his taste. “And wear your pretty
hair open like this for me, okay sugar?” Dean had lowered his voice once more.
“You look so pretty like this.”
And with that the touch was gone and Dean already walked into the hallway to
grab his jacket and shoes. “I’ll see you on friday.” He shouted into the
hallway to tell Seth’s parents goodbye. And like a storm that came quickly,
Dean was out of the door quickly again. Seth just stood there in the hallway
for a moment, taste of the older male still lingering in his mouth as he smiled
a little sheepishly.
If Dean would be like this the majority of times that maybe Seth wouldn’t be
too bothered by his little mood swings. Maybe it would be worth it then.
 
Later that night the whole family was at the table. “Seth I’m going to make
some muffins for Dean, his friends and you on friday. Do you know what kind he
likes.?”
The teen thought back to the day the two of them were at the coffee shop. Dean
had gotten a piece of cake there but Seth couldn’t remember what it was so he
just wanted to make something up. “Uhm..” He struggled for an idea for a
moment.
“You don’t know the favorite food of your boyfriend?” Abigail cut in with her
childish tone and made a face at Seth.
“He is not my boyfriend.” Seth answered because Dean had never mentioned such a
thing and to be quite honest they had kissed only twice and the other times
Seth had been scared by Dean. “I think he would like the banana chocolate ones,
mom.”
Abigail was not done yet. “You’re lying. I saw the two of you kissing when mom
and dad left the living room. I took a picture with my phone because I knew you
would lie.” The 14 year old crossed her arms in front of her chest with a proud
smile on his face. “Did you know that?” She was now looking at dad who was the
stricter part of their parents and had denied her a sleep over at a boy’s house
just last week because teens in that age were just too dangerous to be left
alone together in a house without parents.
Steve gave her a strict look. “Dean had the decency to introduce himself to us.
He stops by to say hello every other day instead of sitting outside in front of
the door, waiting for you to come outside so the two of you can go outside and
secretly do the teenager thing.” Wow that was cool dad. “I believe Dean is a
mature man and can be trusted around Seth. If the two of them kiss in our home
after having coffee with your mother and I that is a totally different story
than your secret dates in the park.” Wow that was REALLY cool.
Seth was still blushing though. His parents and he had never had the talk on
him liking boys he was just too shy to bring it up but probably they knew
anyway. It was a bit obvious. He’d never brought home a girl or adored one like
he adored boys. There were posters of only male wrestlers or male movie
characters in his room. He never crushed on a girl or met with one alone. So
probably he’d been more obvious than he thought and he was thankful his parents
had not addressed it because that would have made him uncomfortable. Sometimes
he wasn’t comfortable with that part of himself fully because not everyone was
accepting like his parents were. It was a scary topic for him to dive into
deeper so he pushed away the thought quickly and was just grateful for his
parents to react like this.
“He’s still not my boyfriend..” Was all Seth contributed to that.
“Drop it Abby, he really isn’t his boyfriend.” Jeremy talked now. “You don’t
really think a dude like that would be into Seth?” He chuckled.
“You’re probably right. Also he looks kinda greasy so when he will stop hanging
around I won’t be bothered either.” Abigail giggled.
That was enough. His siblings made Seth feel bad about himself, he felt
discouraged to go see Dean on friday because it was true. Dean could never like
someone like him. A skinny teenage boy with those big glasses who was so caught
up in his school work and comics. The bad boy needed a hot wild man that could
give him fire when the two had a disagreement.
“Dinner was great mom, thanks. I have homework now.” He lied because he didn’t
have homework for tomorrow but he wanted to be alone. Seth didn’t want to hear
the giggles of his little sister anymore and neither the rude comments of his
brother. With his head hanging low he went to his room and sat at his desk. For
a little bit he just stared out the window into the garden and let his mind
wander.
The comment of Jeremy still stuck to him. “You don’t really think a dude like
that would be into Seth?” Ouch. The truth hurt. Seth had always thought he
wasn’t so bad. He was polite and smart. He knew some good jokes too and he
could be trusted. But maybe those really weren’t things someone like Dean
needed. Maybe that wasn’t enough. With a heavy feeling in his guts Seth got
ready for bed and laid down early. Hopefully he would hear from Dean tomorrow.
That would help.
 
                                      ---
                                        
Regardless to his hopes Seth didn’t hear a word from Dean all week. No call, no
text message, no surprise visit by the red Stealth. Maybe Dean had forgotten
about him already? No.. Come on. Seth tried to tell himself each day that week.
The blonde had said he’d be busy all week. He would be there on friday.
Seth wasn’t disappointed. Friday at almost four the car pulled up in front of
the house and the tall male got out of it. The teen had heard him park already
and was at the door with his bag in one hand before Dean had even reached the
door.
 
                                      ---
                                        
“I watch the chaaaaaaaange in youuuuuuu!” Seth was singing along while they
were riding back from the arena. Dean had fed him some beer there which had
loosened his tongue once again so he didn’t feel embarrassed on his actions.
The older male didn’t seem to be bothered anyway since there was a grin on his
face as he listened to the teen singing one of his favorite songs. Like a
couple of days back they were listening to the Deftones CD.
When the song was over Dean turned down the volume a bit. “Man I didn’t know
you were such a great singer. You should start a band.” For a moment he looked
over his shoulder to give Seth a grin.
The teen blushed a little. “Stop making fun of me.” He was still smiling
though.
“I’m not. You’re like 20 times better than me and I’m the star in every karaoke
bar. You should come with me some time. I promise to give you some beer before.
Don’t want ya to to pee ya pants on stage because ya get scared.”
“Dean!” Seth crossed his arms in front of his chest and pouted. “I would never
pee my pants. I would cry first.”
“Isn’t that the same? Whether you pee through your cock or your eyes?”
“What?” Seth looked at Dean in confusion.
Between the singing and the conversation Seth had not noticed that they were in
a less wealthy part of town now. It wasn’t the worst part of the city but his
parents would never allow him around here alone. He looked out of the window to
look at the tall buildings reaching into the sky. Even though it was past ten
o’clock there were many people on the sidewalks. A homeless was still begging
for some money here and there, young adults with way too big clothes were
hanging around, drinking beer while keeping their eyes open for police cars.
“Do you live here?” Seth asked curiously as he kept watching the people.
“Yeah we’re almost there.” Dean answered and kept his eyes on the street now.
Because the older male drove an old but pretty nice car and was always dressed
alright Seth didn’t expect for him to live here. Then again, Dean somehow fit
in still. The ripped jeans, the uncombed hair, the rough voice. He wouldn’t
stand out if he was between a group of men out there.
The red car pulled into the parking lot of a large housing complex and Dean and
Seth left the car. Brown eyes looked around the area for a moment. There were
even some little boys still out here playing. They were in the sandbox of the
small playground a couple of meters away and were trying to make what looked
like a little fire. Something like that would never be seen at Chrystal Lake.
Somehow Seth got a weird vibe about the area. The night air smelled like
gasoline and the outside walls of the houses looked dirty and grey. He didn’t
fit in here and it scared him a little so he quickly followed Dean to the trunk
to get his bag. Without saying anything now Seth went on to follow Dean into
the house. One window of the partially glass-door had a large split and there
was graphitis on the bottom floor’s inside walls. The hallway smelled weird
too. Like a mix of cold cigarette smoke and lost hope along with some chicken.
He really wasn’t sure where the chicken smell emerged from but he followed Dean
up the stairs of the cold hallway.
They walked for what felt like forever until they’d reached the third floor.
There were four doors here, each leading to a different flat. Dean went through
his keys to open one of the white doors. When Seth entered he found himself in
a dark, small but much warmer hallway. There were some shoes in the corner and
two more doors. One led to a small bathroom, he could see that because the door
was standing open. The other, which was a glass door with wood frame, Dean
pushed open and they stood in his living room which seemed to be the bedroom at
the same time. On the left side there was a king size bed. It was unmade and
laundry was laying in front of it on the floor.
Right next to the bed was a shelf which kind of split the room in two, giving
the bed some privacy but not blocking the view to the television which was on
the wall that Seth had entered through. The only other piece of furniture were
the couch and a small table in front of it, right across from the television.
That was it. It wasn’t fancy, everything looked old and a little dirty.
Dean threw his bag with his sweaty clothes on the floor and dropped down on the
couch immediately. “Not as pretty as your home but ya know, I pay for it
myself.” He was grinning wide and looked at Seth who was still taking
everything in. “Come on in now. You can take off ya jacket and shoes. There
isn’t many cockroaches in here I think.” He laughed when Seth looked at him
with big eyes.
However, the teen did as he was told and put his bag down next to Dean’s put
his jacket and shoes on top of it before coming over to the couch as well and
sitting next to where Dean’s feet rested on the couch. He was still unsure what
to make of the flat yet, it was Dean’s home. Everything here smelled like Dean,
everything here was Dean’s and Seth dared to glance at the bed into which he’d
cuddle up later, smell the sheets and fall asleep to the heavenly musky scent
of Dean Ambrose.
“When are Roman, Jimmy and Jay coming?” Seth broke the silence and looked at
Dean now. The taller man made a motion with his hands for Seth to lay next to
him. There was enough room on the couch anyway. Again Seth did what Dean
demanded and laid on his side so he could look at the tall blonde.
Dean reached out and ran his fingers through Seth’s hair. “They’re not coming.”
He answered in a rough voice and looked at Seth with eyes that seemed to be
unable to look away from the teen’s mouth. “I wanted you all for myself on our
first night in my home.” The words tickled in Seth’s chest and his eyes were
big and innocent when he looked back at Dean. The dirty flat was long
forgotten.
“Why..” His tone was quiet and shaky.
“Because..” Instead of talking Dean pulled Seth closer so the teen had to hover
over Dean in order for their mouths to meet. The sentence was never finished.
Instead Dean licked into Seth’s mouth, moaning at the taste of the teen which
made his young body feel hot as he pressed to Dean’s side.
A strong hand landed on Seth’s lower back, wandered down to a place no one had
ever touched him. The older male squeezed his butt cheek between his fingers
and palm while he was still kissing him and Seth whimpered at that. His
untouched body was getting worked up quickly and he could do nothing to prevent
that because Dean kissed him with such passion that Seth was sure he was seeing
stars behind his eyelids.
Eventually though, the blonde broke the kiss but he didn’t stop holding Seth
like this. Blue eyes met brown eyes and Seth’s mouth stood slightly open. “My
beautiful Seth.” Dean’s voice was even rougher than usually, making the
brunette feel so hot in a place the all his blood was rushing to. “So innocent.
Hm..” He seemed to be thinking. “The things I want to do to you..”
There was a fire in Dean’s eyes, something the teen had not seen so far. It
wasn’t anger and it wasn’t excitement. It was pure lust. And when Dean squeezed
his ass again Seth was sure that his own eyes were expressing the same.
“How about you take off your cute lil glasses for me, pretty boy?” Dean asked
and rand his fingers through the soft dark looks again with the hand that was
not grabbing the younger male’s butt.
Slowly Seth nod and took them off, put them aside. When Dean pulled him into an
open mouthed kiss again Seth wasn’t so sure if that would be the last thing he
took off of his body for the night.
Chapter End Notes
     Hell ya, go get it Seth! Or is it too early for that? Please guys,
     leave comments and let me know what you think so far.
***** Chapter 8 *****
Chapter Summary
     There was a fire in Dean’s eyes, something the teen had not seen so
     far. It wasn’t anger and it wasn’t excitement. It was pure lust. And
     when Dean squeezed his ass again Seth was sure that his own eyes were
     expressing the same.
     “How about you take off your cute lil glasses for me, pretty boy?”
     Dean asked and rand his fingers through the soft dark looks again
     with the hand that was not grabbing the younger male’s butt.
     Slowly Seth nod and took them off, put them aside. When Dean pulled
     him into an open mouthed kiss again Seth wasn’t so sure if that would
     be the last thing he took off of his body for the night.
Chapter Notes
     Here we are. This chapter is a bit more fluffy, Seth is haaaaaaappy!
     He deserves it, doesn't he? After Dean scared him so badly. Anyway,
     there won't be an update until end of next week because of exams on
     tuesday and thursday. After that I'm ready to drop the bomb of this
     story on all of you! Enjoy reading.
Seth laid on top of Dean. His hands were at the sides of the older male’s neck
and softly held him there. The blonde though had his hands all over Seth. One
was resting under his shirt on his back, feeling the soft and warm skin there.
The other one on his butt which he still squeezed. He used that hand to push
Seth down occasionally. Both men were hard in their pants but neither seemed to
want to make the first move to undress the other.
If he was honest Seth had expected for Dean to take off his clothes quite a
while ago but the two of them were just laying like that, making out heavily
that Seth was sure he would stop breathing in a bit if he didn’t catch his
breath. The older one didn’t seem to want to stop though. When he rolled up his
hips against Seth a bit the brunette whimpered immediately and couldn’t keep up
with the kiss anymore. He accidently bit Dean in the lip which made the blonde
chuckle. “Biting, hm?” He mumbled into the kiss.
Even though he had not thought it was possible, Seth turned even more red in
the face. “Sorry.” He whispered back shyly.
“‘s okay.” Was the answer and Dean leaned up to catch another kiss before just
grinning at Seth for a bit. Both of his hands now wandered under Seth’s shirt,
wanting to feel more of the warm skin under his rough palms. “You look good
with your hair all wild, lips pink and eyes so dark. Hm..” The older one was
thinking. About what? Seth wanted to know!
“What does ‘hm’ mean..” He was still whispering, worried that their make out
session was already over.
“Think we should order some food?” What?! Dean was thinking about food while
their hard cocks were pressed together like this? Was he serious?! All that was
in Seth’s head was whether he should try to take off Dean’s shirt of pants
first and which would be less awkward or if he should try kissing the other
man’s throat but he was definitely NOT thinking about food.
“Uhm..” Seth was too surprised by that to even react properly. His brain had
moved to his crotch anyway so there was no point in trying to say something
that made sense. As he swallowed hard he tried to recover from that and
shrugged.
“I think we should get some pizza.” Dean was so quick. He shoved Seth off of
him, got off the couch and adjusted his cock in his pants for a moment before
going to his bag and start shuffling stuff around in it. Seth just laid there
on his side and looked at Dean with slightly shut eyes. He had to squeeze them
a little in order to see better what Dean was doing because his glasses were
still on the table. The blonde seemed to have found what he was looking for -
his phone.
“You like Pepperoni?” While he was asking he was already dialing some number.
Seth grabbed a pillow from the couch to cover his crotch as he sat properly
now. He felt a little embarrassed over his hard on now.
“Sure.” He quickly answered and grabbed his glasses from the table to put them
on his face again. Dean spoke to the pizza delivery on the phone for a moment
before coming back to sit with Seth. Immediately he pulled the younger male
back into his lap and ran his fingers through his hair. For a moment both were
just quiet and looked at each other. There was still this fire in Dean’s eyes
and Seth couldn’t interpret why he didn’t act on it. But then again, he didn’t
want to ask because he didn’t want Dean to think he was only here for THAT.
“You’re so beautiful. You’re the prettiest thing in my home.” There he was
again, with the sugar coating words and Seth felt his belly tickle from the
inside.
“Stop.” He blushed hard and leaned forward to hide his face in the crook of
Dean’s neck. “You’re handsome, you have nothing to worry about.”
Dean chuckled and was about to say something but on the table his phone started
buzzing. “Hand me that?” He asked Seth who would be able to reach it more
easily. As he did so he accidently read the name on the screen. Reby. Oh, a
woman. The butterflies in his belly suddenly turned into rock and Seth
swallowed when he handed over the phone. Dean picked it up.
“What’s up?” Okay, that wasn’t all too nice. Seth just stayed put in Dean’s lap
because the blonde had places his hand on his hip. With his thumb he rubbed
over the skin right above the edge of Seth’s tight jeans. “No I can’t come
now.” Even though he wasn’t looking at Seth as he spoke he rolled his eyes and
threw back his head onto the backrest of the couch. “You just have to figure it
out on your own right now, I’m busy.” A sigh and then he shook his head. “You
will be fine, stop worrying. I can come tomorrow.” Pause. “Alright. Just stay
at Sami’s place tonight. See ya, Reby.” He hung up and put his phone down next
to his legs on the couch. “Sorry. Colleague asked if I could pick her up.”
Oh.. Now Seth felt guilty for getting jealous so quickly and just nod as an
answer. What had he thought? That Dean had some kind of secret girlfriend? No,
no. Sure, the blonde had some issues with his temper but he wasn’t a liar,
right? He had not lied to Seth once so there was no reason for these thoughts.
More guilt built in his chest but he forgot about it when Dean started kissing
him again.  
 
Dean and Seth had moved to the bed after dinner. It was long after midnight and
the teen was tired. They were watching a quiz show on television. “You know the
answer to this one?” Dean asked with his raspy voice. He seemed a little sleepy
himself.
They were all tangled up into each other by now. Seth’s head on Dean’s chest,
one of his legs thrown over the hips of the older man while Dean wrapped his
arm around his shoulders tightly. “No.” Seth didn’t even read the question
because his eyes were half closed. Besides that he had put down his glasses
next to the bed. It was just now that Dean seemed to notice how tired Seth was.
“You wanna sleep?” He asked and Seth not tiredly. “You gonna take off your
jeans or you always sleep like that?” Even though he was tired the teen managed
to laugh softly.
“I’m too lazy to do it.” He admitted and just stayed in his place.
“You’re not gonna sleep in those ridiculously tight jeans. Take’em off, come
on.” Seth heard the amusement in Dean’s voice.
“You do it.” He mumbled, too tired to care about his shyness.
“Alright.” Dean shuffled away from him and Seth whined as he missed the touch
already. The older male ignored him and instead sat up so he could lan over
Seth. He unbuttoned his pants. Suddenly Seth felt less tired and opened his
eyes properly to see what Dean was doing. By now the other man had pushed up
his shirt a little, leaned down to kiss right under Seth’s belly button.
The younger one didn’t know what made his body felt hotter, the sight of Dean
kneeling between his legs as he was opening his jeans and kissing his lower
belly or actually feeling his warm mouth so close to his crotch. While he kept
watching he leaned up on his lower arms a little to see better. Even if the
older one noticed, he didn’t look up and instead opened the zipper. Slowly, oh
so slowly, he peeled down the tight jeans. His lips moved to place some kisses
on Seth’s thighs too and as he pulled the jeans over his ankles Dean bit down
on Seth’s inner thigh. Not too hard but enough for Seth to let a moan slip.
Within seconds his cock was hard in his pants again yet, Dean ignored it
totally.
Instead he moved up Seth’s body again, grabbed for his shirt too to pull it off
of him. “You don’t need that.” His young and innocent body reacted to
everything Dean did. When he wrapped his lips around one of his nipples and
licked it with his rough tongue Seth moaned again. The touch didn’t stay long,
instead Dean gave his other nipple the same treatment before uniting their lips
again.
Even though Seth now closed his eyes to kiss Dean back he could feel that the
older male got busy on himself, pulled down his own pants and kicked them off
the bed. Their almost naked bodies were pressing together again, skin on skin
this time. Seth’s hands stayed in innocent places, one on Dean’s shoulder, the
other one on the back of his head. He was still adjusting to the feeling of
kissing, got so worked up over the smallest of touches that he felt like he
would cum in his underwear from just kissing Dean. His lips and tongue tasted
of pizza still, making his own taste just so much more delicious.
Just when Seth had worked up the courage to let his own tongue slide into
Dean’s mouth now, the older one pulled back. Like earlier that night both
opened their eyes and just looked at each other for a moment. Seth’s mouth was
standing open, he wanted to kiss more, wanted to touch more but he shied away.
Dean had ended the kiss, he probably didn’t want more now.
And Seth was proven right because Dean rolled off of him and laid next to him
again. A small kiss was placed on Seth’s temple as the blonde pulled him into
their prior position again. “Sweet dreams, Seth.” He started rubbing the
younger male’s back with his large hand but totally ignored both of their hard
ons. What. The. Hell. Was. Going. On?
Seth didn’t understand. Why didn’t Dean go further? He didn’t seem like the
person who would wait for the right moment. Rather like the type of person who
would meet just to do the thing. The teen didn’t want to say he was
disappointed but he had expected for something to happen.
While his mind was running wild on reasons why Dean just stopped their intimate
moment, the exhaustion of his body kicked in and he fell asleep.
 
                                      ---
                                        
“Can you do me a favor?” Dean was hugging Seth so tight that the teen had to
stop himself from peeing the bed for the past half hour. Unlike him, who had
already been up for an hour or so, Dean had not even opened his eyes properly
yet.
“Anything if you will let me go to the bathroom first.” He was squirming from
left to right because his bladder was hurting slightly.
“Hm..” Dean mumbled, drifting back to sleep and not releasing his tight grip.
It felt nice to wake up with someone. So nice, Seth would have been overwhelmed
by it if he didn’t need to pee so badly. He nudged Dean in the shoulder softly
to wake him up again. “Hmn..” He mumbled some more. “Make coffee and throw some
buns in the oven for breakfast.” Finally he let Seth roll out of bed.
Even though the teen missed the touch already, he stormed out of the room to
the small bathroom. God, that felt like heaven. Because he was already in the
bathroom he brushed his teeth too and washed his face. The hair he pulled into
a tight bun before coming back to the bed/living room. Dean was snoring softly.
Ridiculous, it was past 12 already. Seth chuckled and went to his bag to throw
on some clothes.
Alright. Breakfast now. There was only one other door in the flat so he figured
the kitchen would be there. As he entered, he was right. It was rather small
and had a window that faced the inner yard with the parking lot they had
arrived at last night. Regardless to the cloudy and rather cold weather kids
were outside, playing ball and using the playground. There were many more
people outside than they would be on Chrystal Lake in this weather. People
there liked their cozy living rooms too much apparently. Seth liked this,
seeing the people out there. All of them were living here in this rather
miserable spot of town yet, they seemed to have made a home here.
“I don’t hear the coffee machine.” Dean’s sleepy voice shouted from the other
room. Seth snapped out of his thoughts and went to work. A smile stead on his
face as he was preparing everything. Because he was unfamiliar with the kitchen
he took quite a bit to fix the breakfast. When he was done he filled a cup of
coffee and carried it over to the bed. Dean had already turned on the
television again, was laying on his belly. One of his arms was hanging off the
bed but his eyes were open a bit.
It was a beautiful view. Seth wished he could see this more often. His heart
was beating quicker at the sight. If he wouldn’t be too young to face those
problems he’d be sure he was close to some kind of stroke. “Here.” His voice
was soft and he handed Dean the cup. Now, for the first time since the two of
them knew each other, Seth leaned in and stole a quick peck from Dean. He
figured that in this sleepy state he could get away with it.
“Sugar, that’s how you kiss your mom.” Dean grunted as he rolled to his side
and sat up to rub his eyes before he grabbed for the cup and took a sip of the
hot black liquid. “Try again.”
His cheeks turned red right away. “Sorry.” He whispered and sat at the edge of
the bed again. His hand now came up to cup Dean’s cheek. Then he leaned in and
closed his eyes. Maybe he did that a bit too soon because when he leaned in he
bumped into Dean’s nose with his glasses so they were pressed into his face in
a weird angle and he had to pull back. Seth made an uncomfortable face. Dean
though, he took it easy and laughed at the small incident.
“Wanna take those off?” He encouraged Seth again who felt so embarrassed he’d
rather quit. The blue eyes that were focussed on him though seemed to have set
their mind to making Seth kiss the older male so he took off the glasses.
Before he had worked up the courage to try again Seth breathed in deeply. Again
he cupped Dean’s cheek with his hand. When he leaned in this time there were no
further issues. Their lips melted together like a puzzle. His free hand Seth
placed on Dean’s thigh because from his position it was kind of hard to sit
upright and it got even harder when Dean licked into his mouth. This time he
tasted like the coffee and like sleep. Encouraged by Dean wanting him to kiss
him Seth dared to move his tongue forward too, exploring Dean’s mouth now. The
older male seemed to be satisfied and hummed into the kiss until the two of
them broke apart. “I feel like you should check on the buns.” He whispered
against Seth’s lips with half a grin.
“Oh crap!” He’d forgotten they were still in the oven so he hurried to get them
out.
 
It was around five. The two of them were still in bed. Seth was in underwear
again, Dean was in underwear still. All day they’d done nothing but made out
and watched TV. The teen was on cloud nine. He loved this Dean. Loved the way
their bodies felt against each other, the way they kissed and tasted each other
hell even the way Dean tickled his belly when Seth found the jokes on TV lame
while the other liked them. “Stop!” He choked out as the older straddled his
hips to pin Seth down and tickle all of his belly now.
“Not until you admit that it was funny!” Dean was laughing even though he was
the one on the tickling end.
“It was funny! It was so funny!” Seth screamed out between hysterical laughter
and tried to get away from Dean’s hands but there was no way out. The blonde
kept the torture up for a little longer, grinning when Seth tried to slap at
his hands. Eventually he stopped. Still chuckling he got off of th brunette and
laid next to him again.
“Love your laugh.” He leaned over for one kiss before totally laying down
again. “I wish you wouldn’t have to go.”
Oh.. Seth was reminded that their time together was almost up. He’d been so on
cloud nine that he had paid little attention to the fact that he’d have to
leave soon to be home for dinner.
“Maybe.. If I call mom I can stay another night?” He really wanted to, wanted
to spend another day with Dean in bed like this.
“Nah.” The blonde shook his head. “Got some business later tonight. Now that
we’re speaking of it, would you be okay if I asked Roman to drive you home? I
have to leave in half an hour.” Seth fell from the cloud he’d been flying on
and landed right on his ass.
“Oh.” He just answered and shrugged. “It’s okay.” But the smile was gone from
his face and he looked back at the television. He wanted to stay here with Dean
forever. Wanted to share kisses, bake the frozen rolls for Dean, bring him
coffee to bed, almost die of tickle-attacks and stay in this messy apartment
until they were old.
“Good.” Dean didn’t seem to notice the sadness on the younger male. If Seth was
honest with himself he knew he was overreacting. He was just going home, not
too far away. But here in Dean’s home he felt save. No siblings that were
mocking him, no homework, no responsibilities. It was a good feeling. While he
wanted to use the last minutes and cuddled up to Dean tightly, the other one
had his phone at his ear already. “Yo, Rome.” Seth would miss that rough voice
the second he’d leave the apartment. Dean was talking for a bit and Seth just
laid there, smelled his warm skin and held on to Dean. His belly was still full
of butterflies. Every touch of Dean set his skin on fire. Just thinking about
Dean made the whole world spin a little faster. Everything would be okay as
long as he was with Dean. “Alright.” He was ripped out violently of his little
moment when Dean just got up. “He’s on his way. Let’s get dressed.” Nooooooo.
Seth didn’t want to. For a moment he considered to suggest to just stay here
until Dean was back but now Roman was on his way already so that wouldn’t be
polite.
 
Twenty minutes later Roman was on the couch in the apartment and drank some
water from a cup Seth had gotten him. The teen was busy packing his few things
while the two older men were discussing when they were going to meet for a
workout on monday. He wished he could take part in the conversation. But he
couldn’t. Because monday Seth would be sitting in school while Roman got to
hang out with Dean. Alright, this wasn’t fair. Being jealous of Roman? That was
stupid. But then again, Seth just wished to be in his spot.
“You ready, kid?” Roman asked because he’d finished his drink.
“Yeah, I should have everything.” He nodded.
“Well if not ya have a reason to come back.” Dean winked at Seth and the teen’s
knees felt weak immediately.
“Dean.” Roman rolled his eyes and placed his hand on Seth’s shoulder before
grabbing his bag with the other. “Then let’s go.” Roman went to the hallway to
put on his shoes. Seth looked at Dean shyly. He wanted to kiss him goodbye but
didn’t know if it was okay with Roman being around so he just stood there and
gave Dean a small smile.
“Do you really think I could come back?” He asked softly and rubbed his palms
together nervously.
Dean got up from the couch to walk towards Seth. “Sure.” He said in a low tone.
“I’ll let you know when I can. Will be busy for the next two days but we can
hang out wednesday.” Regardless to Seth not even knowing what homework he would
have to do that day he agreed quickly When it came to Dean he would do his
homework late at night if it was necessary. “Cool, sweet cheeks. Then Imma see
you wednesday.”
Finally Dean took the lead and grabbed Seth by the wrist to pull him closer
again. Their mouths met for one more kiss. Seth wanted to make it last, wanted
to taste Dean again but Roman was shuffling around in the hallway so Dean
pulled away. “Text when you’re home.” Seth nod and turned around to leave. As
he was doing to a slap hit his ass and he turned around immediately, face
already going red again.
“Dean!” He giggled but felt his heart jump once more when the dirty blonde
winked at him.
 
They pulled out of the parking lot and Seth already missed the screams of the
playing kids, the slightly oily smell in the cold air, the ugly building that
was Dean’s home. He sighed a little and looked out of the window.
“You guys had a good time?” Roman asked as they drove.
“Yes. It was a really great time, actually.” Seth admitted and felt his face
going hot again.
“What did you do?”
“Uhm..” Seth felt a little shy. “Nothing special. We watched tv and we talked a
lot. Dean almost killed me when he tickled me. Nothing else.”
Roman huffed with a smile on his face. “Sounds like fun.” For a moment he
hesitated but then he asked more. “Nothing else, hm? Did you want to do
something with Dean? Did he get one of his moods again?”
“No!” Seth answered immediately and maybe a little bit too loud. “I mean, no.”
He was quieter now. He’d felt the need to defend Dean right away. “Everything
was great. He was great. He didn’t have another moment since the last time.”
With that Roman seemed to be satisfied. The worry that had slightly built up on
his face was gone. “So what are your plans for the rest of the weekend?” He
changed the topic. The older male had sensed Seth being defending of Dean right
away and didn’t want to put him in a funny spot now.
“I have no plans. Just back to my homework, I guess.” Seth shrugged now.
“Right. You still go to school.” Roman laughed a little. “How old are you
again?”
“Seventeen?” Seth sank deeper in his seat because he felt like a child now.
“You should come to pool night with me.”
“Hm.” Seth wanted to. He really did. Roman was nice, it would probably be fun.
“I would love to but.. I don’t think my parents would allow that.”
“Your parents? Why? Why do you have to ask them? You’re seventeen already.”
Yeah because protective parents worked like that. Seth sighed. “They don’t like
it when I hang out with people they don’t know. They think I’ll be abducted or
so.” Roman couldn’t help it. He laughed at that. It was such a warm laugh that
Seth had to smile along with him.
“You should just call them and ask, Seth. You’re almost a grown up.”
“They will say no, I know it.”
“Come on. You wanna miss out on the fun, big boy?” What a joke that name was.
“No but..”
“Stop with the buts. Just try. You have nothing to lose.” Roman made it sound
so easy. But his parents were not that easy to convince. They stopped at a red
light and Roman turned to look at Seth, pat his shoulder and gave him a warm
grin. “Try calling them. If they say no I will drive you home now. If they say
yes I will just bring you home later. You won’t die over some pool on a
saturday night.”
The teen was sure his parents would say now. Then again, Roman was being so
friendly, made Seth feel so welcome that he grabbed his phone from his pocket.
His mom picked up after a couple of seconds. Good, she would be easier to
convince. “Hey mom.” He greeted her.
“Hey baby. Everything okay?” She was worried because of his call immediately.
 “Yes mom, I’m good. I just have a tiny little question.”
“What is it?” Her tone was worried still.
“Is it okay if I stay out a little longer?”
“Stay out? Out where? Outside?”
“No, no. A friend of Dean invited me for a game night.” That was not really
what it was but he couldn’t say they would be going to a bar.
“What friend?” She was curious. Jennifer always got like that, always needed to
know who her son was hanging out with.
“His name is Roman. They work together.”
“And he is going to drive you home tonight?”
“Yes.”
“Hm..” She thought about it for a moment. “I guess it’s okay since it’s
saturday. But please don’t come home too late.”
Seth could barely believe it. She’d said yes just like that. A huge smile built
on his face as he looked over at Roman and nod his head quickly. “Of course,
mom! Thank you so much.” The joy was clear in his tone.
“Have fun, sweety. And call if anything is wrong.”
“Sure. Bye mom.” They hung up and Seth smiled at Roman. “She said yes! I can’t
believe my mom allowed that.”
“Told ya so.” Roman laughed together with Seth’s smiles and changed the
direction so they could heat towards The Cave.
***** Chapter 9 *****
Chapter Notes
     Soo here I am back from exam week and the time I needed to recover
     after that. I went to see my family last week which was nice because
     I live quite a bit away from them. That's why I know you won't be mad
     I made you wait two weeks. Updates will come more regularly again
     from now on. I'm telling you all, we are getting dangerously close to
     allllllll the shit going down. Enjoy this chapter and let me know
     what you think.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
It turned out Seth had no talent in playing pool. “Okay, let me show you one
more time.” Roman leaned towards the table, showing Seth how to hold the stick.
“Roman just drop it. I suck at this. You guys play and I will just watch, it’s
fine.” The Samoan didn’t seem to be satisfied with this answer. He grabbed Seth
by the wrist and pulled him back to the pool table just as he tried sitting
down on a bar stool.
“Not gonna happen on my watch. Move yo ass back here. Look, it’s Jimmy’s turn
now. Pay attention to what he does.” The teen really tried to get into it but
half an hour later he was still performing poorly. Regardless of his lacking
skills he still had a great time with Roman and his cousins. They were really
funny. Especially Jimmy and the way he talked about his wife Naomi. She had
called a little bit ago and told him to pick up some fresh diapers for their
newborn. When she had noticed the noise in the background and picked up on him
being in a bar the horror on his face was bigger than on any horror movie
victim’s face. It was hilarious. “Alright kid. Take a break. What do you want
to drink?”
It was just now that Roman allowed for Seth to sit down. “Coke.” The teen was
feeling a little tired so he needed some caffeine in his system. Both sat down
at the bar and Roman ordered a beer, his first one of the night, and coke. “You
know.” Seth started speaking and pushed his glasses up on the back of his nose
in the meantime. “Thank you for taking me with you. This is really fun. Even
though I suck at this a lot. I wish I was a little older so I could actually
hang out with you guys without being the weird kid.” He laughed at his own
words. It was his idea of their friendship. They were all in their mid-twenties
and he was just the weird young boy tracking along.
Roman frowned at his words. “Weird kid? You’re one of us, Seth. You’re always
welcome to come here.”
“Roman.. I shouldn't even be in here.” He lowered his voice so the bartender
wouldn’t pick up what he said.
The Samoan couldn’t help but laugh at that. “Stop worrying. The owner of this
place has a tight connection to FCW. Everyone who is part of FCW is part of the
Cave Crowd. Don’t think about it too much. As long as you behave nobody is
going to kick you out. And who knows, on good days you might get a free lap
dance. Candy over there is a real pro.”
Seth’s eyes widened in shock and he quickly shook his head. “No! I mean.. I
don’t think.. No..” He was stumbling over his own words because he got nervous.
She was a beautiful woman, sure. Blonde long hair, a thin body and huge boobs
and she danced on the pole like she had never been doing anything else in her
life (probably hadn’t) but he had no interest in girls. The older male seemed
to pick up on it an shrugged.
“They bring dudes out here too sometimes. Anyway, my point was just, feel free
in this place. It’s a really chill location to go to. And you’re always welcome
to hang out with me and with the twins too. I don’t know if Dean introduced you
to someone else?”
“Uh.. No. Not really. Only you guys. Dean and you are best friends, right?”
Roman hesitated for a moment and shrugged. “Something like it. He doesn’t like
people getting too close so I guess I’m just a normal friend.” The Samoan took
a sip of his beer. “It’s almost midnight.” It was obvious he quickly wanted to
change the topic. Something had happened between Dean and Roman. It was clearly
in the air. But Seth felt too shy to point it out. He had no intention to anger
the older male. “When you finished your coke I should get you home. Don’t want
to anger mom on our first play date.” He winked at Seth who blushed. Very
funny.
 
“There we are. Tell mom I said hi.” Roman chuckled as he stopped the car in
front of Seth’s home.
“She will want you to visit if I do that.” He was giggling and pulled his
backpack from the floor of the car into his lap.
“I probably should sometime soon considering I’m basically your private taxi.”
Seth frowned immediately. “Please don’t think that’s why I’m hanging out with
you.” There was a serious concern in his voice. The older man just laughed
about it and shook his head.
“C’me here, big boy.” The funny name seemed to turn into an established thing.
Even though it was a little awkward in the little space, Roman hugged Seth
goodbye. A sweet smell was in the long hair of the other man and Seth was this
close to asking him what conditioner he used but before things would get even
more awkward he said goodbye too and left the car.
 
                                      ---
                                        
“I can’t meet today, sorry. But tomorrow is fine?” Seth and Cody were walking
through the hallway towards their lockers. School had just ended and the
brunette was full of excitement when he opened the door to where his belongings
were locked in. “We can meet at my place and finish the project.”
“Alright, tomorrow is early enough. Why can’t you meet today though?” The two
of them were now putting on their jackets.
“I’m meeting Dean in the city.” Seth told his friend.
The other boy frowned a little. “Is Dean the guy I met you with the other day.
“Yeah, he is.”
“He was.. Pretty big. And angry.”
“Ah, sometimes he gets his moods but he is my.. He is really nice.” Seth didn’t
want to get too much into detail with it for several reasons. First off, Dean
and he had no label. They kissed here and there and hung out but that was about
it. And second of all, it was nobody’s business in school that he liked boys.
Or more that one boy. Who wasn’t a boy but a man? Way out of his league. STOP!
He had to stop himself from even thinking in that direction. Those were
thoughts that sometimes kept him from sleeping for hours.
“Okay.” Cody dropped the topic and together they walked towards the bus
station. They went into different busses. Cody going home, Seth to the city
center. Dean and he would meet at a sandwich bar for a late lunch. After he had
been with Dean on Saturday he figured the older male just got up a bit ago
anyway.
He waited outside the place they were to eat at and watched out for the tall
man with the dirty blonde hair. Dean was only five minutes late for now. It
wasn’t really a reason to be worried but Seth’s mind wandered. What if he’s not
going to show up? What he if was sick of him already? What if..
His thoughts were stopped when the red Dodge Stealth made a stop in front of
him and Dean jumped out of the car. “Will call you when you need to be back.”
He let the driver know. And the driver was what made the what-ifs in Seth’s
head just a little bit louder. A skinny brunette woman with a very beautiful
face and long hair came into display as he leaned to the side a little. She
smiled at Dean with such white teeth that it almost hurt to look. Her boobs
were obviously bigger than God had made them but not too big to make them look
all fake.
“I will be waiting for your call, Dean.” She drove off and left Seth with a
funny feeling in his stomach. The other male didn’t seem bothered when he
turned to look at Seth with a cheeky grin.
“Hello, pretty boy.” Without mentioning the woman at all Dean leaned in and
stole a quick kiss. “You look sweet today. Is that a different pair of
glasses?”
Really? Now Seth wasn’t sure if Dean was joking but somehow the question made
him uncomfortable. “Uh.. No.” He shrugged.
The other man didn’t make any of it and just went inside. Seth followed on his
heels and they sat down, ordered food and drinks and sat there. Unlike Seth,
Dean didn’t seem to feel funny about the situation outside at all. “Man, what’s
on your mind, Seth? You look at me with those puppy eyes one more second and I
might as well go crazy.”
“Sorry!” The teen had not realized he had been looking like that and looked
down at his hands. Again he shrugged. “Who.. Who was that girl?” His voice
wasn’t loud, he was scared of the answer and it was written all over his body
language.
Dean seemed to pick up on his worry but chuckled about it. “Just Reby.
Remember? The colleague.”
“And why is she in your car?”
“Because her’s broke down and she needed to get to some promo training at the
performance center.” Dean didn’t laugh about the second question now.
“And where were you coming from?” The worry was making Seth’s belly feel so
funny that he could feel hickups building down there already. Maybe that was
the reason for his inability to stop asking Dean about the girl.
“Listen.” The older one was definitely annoyed by now. “I didn’t agree to meet
you so we could talk about some bitch riding my car. What’s the fuckin problem,
Seth? Just spit it out?” His voice was slightly louder than necessary and it
made Seth flinch. The restaurant was so busy that it remained unnoticed.
“Nothing, sorry.” He quickly whispered.
“What’s that? Couldn’t hear ya baby voice!” While he spoke Dean rolled his eyes
at Seth. “Whatever, come on. Get up.”
What? But they didn’t even get the water they asked for yet. The dirty blonde
threw some money on the table and hen Seth didn’t move quick enough he grabbed
his shoulder to pulled him off the chair. “I said get up. Why do you never just
do as asked?”
Honestly, Seth could not recall one situation where he had told Dean no but by
now he got pretty scared about the rough touch and the angry voice. Quickly he
put on his jacket and followed Dean outside. Outside the first thing Dean did
was lighting up a cigarette. Seth just stood there awkwardly while Dean smoked
and typed something into his phone. His face gave away that he was still
pissed.
“Dean?” Seth tried carefully.
“What?” Okay.. Okay.. Not a good time. Seth didn’t say anything else and let
him finish the text. Only when he had put his phone in his pocket Dean put his
hand on the younger man’s neck and grabbed it tightly. His fingernails hurt as
they cut into Seth’s skin and he had no chance but to follow Dean to the bus
stop.
“Where are we going?” He asked, voice obviously filled with fear.
“To my place.” Seth wasn’t sure whether he wanted that but he didn’t really
have a choice now either.
 
When they walked over the parking lot this time the oily smelling air and
screaming kids were little comforts. On their whole ride here Dean had made him
feel stupid about anything he said or did. By now Seth was so nervous about
every step he took that he fell over the last step in front of Dean’s flat and
hurt his knee pretty bad. Under his jeans he could feel it was busted open and
bleeding probably but the older male had no care and just grabbed him by the
jacket to pull him inside the apartment.
Alright. Seth made peace with the fact that he would die within the next half
hour. He had angered Dean so much that now he would end him. With hot tears in
his eyes, he sat on the couch and held his hurting knee. Because he couldn’t
please him any way he ignored Dean for now and wanted to check on where he was
hurt. The slightest touch made him whimper. “Hey!” Dean snapped and yelled loud
enough to make Seth duck his head. “Stop fucking whimpering!” There he was.
Moody and scary Dean, so angry that the pretty blue in his eyes had turned
cold. “Shut your fucking mouth or I will”
He just nod quickly. The tear had now escaped his eyes. This was not what he
had expected of the day. He thought Dean and he would go for some food and
share kisses and laugh about their days again. But now the distress on his body
was so thick that the blonde could probably smell it.
Without wanting to he was sniffling. The silent crying made his nose run. “Oh
my god, I told you to shut up! Why can’t you ever listen? “Shut your mouth!”
“I’m sorry!” His voice was shaking hard. “But my knee, it hurts. Dean please, I
want to go home.” Seth had probably never felt this unhappy in his whole life.
Not even when his brother had caught a picture of him naked in the shower and
brought it in several printed versions to a huge family dinner. “Please, I can
walk home I..” He didn’t even know what. He was sobbing by now and couldn’t see
Dean’s reaction through his swollen eyes.
“You’re still talking!” The teen could hear and feel the other male coming
closer and hovering over him and a small scream escaped his throat when a big
hand grabbed his hair and yanked back his head. “I told you I would shut you
up!” That was it! Dean would stab him now. No one would ever find his body out
here in this part of the city. Who knew to how many people the blonde had done
this before.
“Please, please don’t..!” Seth never got to finish his sentence. Rough lips
pressed on his and cut off his oxygen. Dean was kissing him angrily, suffocated
him almost, choked back all words in his throat. And he also, even though Seth
hated to admit it right now, he also made the pain in his heart die down. So
Dean was not going to kill him.
Still, the much bigger male wasn’t exactly careful with Seth either. This kiss
was more teeth than lips, more biting than kissing and he forced the teen back
to lay on the couch so he could hover over him, lay on top of him. Regardless
of his actions, his body language was still angry. Violently Dean rubbed their
crotches together. It hurt a little but then again it felt so good and Seth
started feeling so hot. The tears dried on his heated face and instead of
grabbing hard and Dean’s shoulders and being scared to get killed he almost
melted into the violent touch.
“You’re not going to go home. You don’t run from me, Seth.” Dean muttered
sharply as he kissed down his jawline. “You’re mine, pretty boy. All mine. I
decide when you go where and right now you will stay right here.”
The possessive sound on Dean’s voice would have been sexy if the situation
before had not occurred. Now it was just scary. “Dean..” Seth didn’t dare to
say it out loud, didn’t want to anger him again.
“Sh..” Dean was now kissing his neck, hips still grinding together. “Just enjoy
this, Seth. Stop with all the questions. Just enjoy.” One hand slipped under
Seth’s shirt and rubbed over the warm and naked skin of his side up in the
direction of his armpit. Before getting there Dean’s thumb and index finger
found Seth’s nippled and started rubbing it between the two digits. Immediately
Seth made a small moan. His untouched body reacted so quick to everything that
Dean did that it pushed down all fear and doubt. “That’s better, baby boy.”
Despite the light aggression in his voice Dean seemed much calmer now. He bit
at Seth’s neck, sucked on the skin there until a big purple mark stood out
against the soft skin. “Mine.” He whispered again.
Seth’s cock was hard in his tight jeans now. Dean was hard too but that
remained mostly without further notice. Instead, the older male pushed his leg
between Seth’s legs and he started rubbing his thigh against Seth’s crotch. As
a natural reaction the younger man rolled up his hips to meet the friction and
yes, yes this was so much better than a hurt knee and tears in his eyes. This
was the Dean he wanted to be with. Touching and kissing and sweet names in his
ear.
But as quick as everything had started it was over too. Dean united their
mouths for one more kiss before sitting up and looking down at Seth a little
breathless, slight smile on his face. “There it is.” He laughed. Dean actually
laughed. What the heck? Once again Seth failed to follow what had happened.
“There’s that pretty look again.”
The blonde got off the couch and ignored Seth for a moment. When he came back
and sat down next to him he had the remote in one hand and turned on the tv.
There was a quiz show again, Dean seemed to love those. Seth was still in shock
about what just happened. “Why do you do that?” He couldn’t hold in the
question. It was too much to take. The past two hours had been too much to take
for his young mind.
“Do what?” Dean grabbed his legs and pulled them on top of his lap so he could
lean back while Seth was still laying. His eyes were completely focussed on the
television.
The younger man hesitated. He wanted to know but then doubts came up in his
chest. The whole day was overwhelming and he really wanted to rest. There was
no strength for a discussion left in him and he shook his head. He shouldn’t
have asked. His eyes closed and he tried to put his thoughts in the right
order.
“Do what?” Dean asked again. His voice gave away that he was a little absent.
Just ask. Ask one thing. Man up, Rollins. You’re almost a grown up . Hu, that
was funny. He was laying on Dean’s couch with a hard-on because of HIM and
heard Roman’s voice in his head. Did Dean even know he hung out with his friend
the other night? “I don’t understand why.. Whenever we do something you..” He
struggled to find fitting words because his head was still all over the place.
“Why do you stop?” Hopefully, Dean would understand what he tried to say.
“You’re underage. As pretty as your ass is, I ain’t going to jail for it.” And
again Dean shrugged away such a big thing like it was nothing and just
continued to watch tv.
 
                                      ---
                                        
Later that day Seth was in his room. Dinner had just been finished and he laid
on his bed, reading a comic. Or trying to. He couldn’t focus on anything after
all the things that had gone down today. His hurting knee was a constant
reminder of it too. Luckily it was bruised just a bit so his mother had not
noticed.
Today had been by far the worst of Dean’s mood swings. It was hard for the teen
to wrap his mind around it. One moment Dean was this monster who he thought
would kill him and who had hurt him physically and emotionally. The next moment
he was all jokes and laughs and sweet kisses and calling him nicknames. That
was the Dean he wanted to hang out with. But apparently, the dirty blonde only
came with both sides. If the good part would only be there most of the times
maybe Seth could take it. Maybe for Dean he could swallow a bitter pill once in
a while. After all the older male had always made it up to him right.. Right?
Well, Seth could understand why Dean didn’t want to go all the way. Maybe, if
he was in the position to be the older one, he would be the voice of reasoning
too. But what was all the business with this Reby girl about?
His wandering thoughts made his head hurt and without thinking about it enough
he had already grabbed his phone and called a number.
“Hello?” A thick voice answered. Obviously, the other man had been asleep.
“Oh.” Seth felt bad about the call immediately. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to..”
“It’s fine. Don’t worry.”
“Okay..” He was still hesitating.
“What’s up?” There was a dramatic yawn at the other end.
“I.. I don’t know. I have a pretty bad headache. Today was a weird day. I can’t
really sleep I think.”
“Hm.. So you thought you’d just wake me up so you wouldn’t be alone with that
fate?” Tired laughter appeared on the other end. “Nah don’t worry. Just fell
asleep while watching tv. Can I help?”
“I’m not sure I.. Just wanna talk.”
“About what?”
“I’m not sure.” Seth repeated.
“Want to go for brunch tomorrow?”
“I have school.” Seth giggled. That seemed to be forgotten all the time.
“Oh, right. Totally forgot. When do you have the lunch break.” Seth told him
the time. “Okay. We can just eat together then. I’ll come to school and we can
go together from there.”
A little bit he hesitated. The same thing had gone totally wrong today. “I
guess that is okay.” He agreed nevertheless.
“Okay cool. Then throw in a video game now. And tomorrow you tell me about it
because I really need some new games.”
The teen giggled again and nod even though the other man couldn’t see it. “I
will. So you can go back to sleep now. See you tomorrow, Roman.”
“Sweet dreams, Seth.” Both hung up. Wow. The voice of the Samoan had calmed
Seth down quickly. He felt better about the day now, felt like he would
actually be able to go to sleep for a while. As the older male had asked him to
he started his PlayStation. Maybe tomorrow would be a little bit better than
today. Well.. Could things really get much worse right now?
Chapter End Notes
     Woah that was a lot to take in. I'm actually as excited as you
     probably are to see where this is going. Let me know what you think.
     Should Seth really hang out with Roman this much after what just
     happened with Dean? What's the issue between Roman and Dean because
     they're tight friends, right?
***** Chapter 10 *****
Chapter Notes
     Oh oh oh! Quick update. Shit is starting to go doooooown but first
     it's tome for some bonding. I just want to remind everyone of looking
     at the tags because I have gotten some complains about Seth hanging
     out with Roman. Guuuuuys why would you deny sweet lil angel Seth his
     Roman. BE NICE BECAUSE HE IS NICE! And have fun with this chapter!
See the end of the chapter for more notes
“I finished the game last night so I brought it with me so you could play it
now.” Seth was shuffling around some things in his backpack until he found the
game and pulled it out to hand it over to Roman. “You can have it as long as
you need to.” He smiled softly and showed off the gap between his front teeth.
Seth didn’t do that too often because he felt insecure about the gap. But Roman
seemed to like everything he did, whether it was a call at night, his story
about school, the game or Seth’s smile. He had complimented it the first moment
they had met today.
“Thanks, Seth. I’ll look into it later.” While Roman took the game the waitress
came to serve them sandwiches. “So how has the week been so far?” He asked and
took a huge bite of his food.
The teen shrugged.
“What was up with you last night, big boy?” Seth blushed at the nickname and
shrugged again.
“I don’t know. Yesterday was funny. I hung out with Dean and he got into his
mood again.”
“That’s why you were restless last night?”
“Yeah..” Seth admitted. “It was pretty bad.”
Roman shifted around in his seat. Seth could sense the tension in the older man
as he looked at Seth worriedly. “Did he hurt you?” The way he asked was almost
a little bit too casual. Like it was something that happened often.
Once again Seth shrugged. “Not on purpose. He was mad at me because I asked
many questions about Reby so he said we had to go home and couldn’t have lunch.
When we were walking up the stairs to his apartment he was dragging me on my
arm and I fell on the stairs and knocked my knee on the steps. It busted open a
little but it’s okay now.” He tried to give Roman an assuring smile but it was
obvious the story made him uncomfortable.
“Did he calm down after that?”
“Not for a while but.. After a bit yeah. He made up for it.”
That seemed to get Roman’s attention even more. “How?” He asked very drily now.
Why was it that whenever it was about Dean Roman got so uncomfortable?
“We made out for a while.”
“Just made out?”
“Yeah..” Seth was blushing now. The Samoan probably thought he was nothing but
a funny kid.
“Good.” That sounded more pleased than Seth had expected.
“Good? Why is that good?”
“You’re young. Look.. You’re very handsome. I’m sure Dean would love to give
that  to you. Actually, I know he would love it. But you’re very young. Without
wanting to hurt you but I think Dean is in the wrong to touch you at all. But
that’s just my opinion.”
Seth didn’t understand. Was Roman not happy for his friend and him too? Did he
not want them to be something serious? “Oh..” Was all he replied before taking
a bite of his sandwich too. Both men fell quiet for a little bit and regardless
of the critical topic that had made Seth a little bit sad, the mood between
them had not gone down. It was just Roman’s look to what was going on between
him and Dean. He had not been mean about it but he was honest. Seth appreciated
that. “Can I ask something?” His words were a little muffled because his mouth
was stuffed with food.
“Sure.” The big man looked at him.
“What’s with you and Dean? I thought you were best friends but whenever I bring
him up you kind of.. Your mood changes.” Seth looked at Roman with big insecure
eyes. He hoped he didn’t cross a line with his question.
Again Roman didn’t look too happy about the topic of conversation. “I think
that is a story Dean should tell you.” And once more the dark haired man didn’t
answer his question. For now Seth gave up on the topic.
Together they finished lunch. When both were done eating Seth gave his watch a
quick check. “I still have twenty minutes. If you want to I can walk you to
your car.”
“Charming.” The Samoan smiled at Seth. His smile was so warm and kind that it
almost made the teen’s belly tickle. Woah.. Hold up. That was shit he only felt
around Dean. No way. No way this happened now. Before he could think about it
too much Roman had already agreed to the idea. “I will take up on that. Also, I
was wondering what you’re up to tonight?” While speaking he put some cash for
both their sandwiches and drinks on the table and got up to put on his jacket.
“Uhm..” Seth thought about it for a bit even though he knew exactly that, like
every other night, he had no plans. “I have to meet a classmate after school
for a project and then I will just go home and.. Do nothing. As always.”
“Jimmy and I are going to the Cave again for some pool. You can join.” Together
they left the restaurant.
“It is a school night. I’m not sure my mom would let me go out. Sorry..” Why?
Are? You? Such? A? Child? Seth hated this. He couldn’t go out with his new
friends for brunch, not for pool, hell he probably wasn’t even allowed to go to
Roman’s house because his parents didn’t know him. It truly upset him and for
the first time in his whole life, Seth wished he was over age already. Usually,
it wasn’t a big deal for him but now he just wanted to hang out with Roman and
Dean and the Uso twins and he wanted to hang out at FCW and at the bar and
drink and he wanted to play pool and kick all of their asses in one night. But
he couldn’t because he was just a 17-year-old kid.
The Samoan put his large hand on Seth’s upper back to guide him as they were
walking. “Let me talk to mom, hm?” What was with these guys that they were so
eager to meet his parents? First Dean, now Roman. Maybe it was a thing amongst
grown ups. They didn’t feel uncomfortable about meeting parents. Maybe because
they were adults too.. “When do you come back from your friend’s place?”
“Dinner is at 5:30 so I think at 5.” Roman’s hand on his back felt good. Unlike
the day before where Dean had grabbed his neck, it gave him the feeling of
protection. He didn’t feel so shy about people looking at him. Now they were
probably looking at him because of that beautiful man to his side. Ha-ha!
“I will turn up at 6:30 then and talk to her. Believe me, no mom can deny Roman
Reigns a wish.” The tall man chuckled and looked down at Seth. That smile on
his face made Seth’s smile grow too. “Hey look.” Roman stopped walking and
pointed at the store they were standing in front of.
It was a jeweler. The teen didn’t own much jewelry. Only his watch but that
barely count because it had no silver or gold or anything. It was made of a
leather band. He looked back at Roman with question marks in his eyes. The
Samoan pointed at a sign in the window.
Get two bracelets with an engraving of your choice for the price of one.
“Come on, let’s get them.” Seth wasn’t sure if Roman was joking or not.
Friendship bracelets? Wasn’t that a little childish.. And girly? “Oh come on.”
Roman saw the doubt in the teen’s eyes and just rolled his own eyes as he
pulled him inside the store. “You’ll have enough time to be a stubborn grown
up, believe me.”
They walked up to the counter where an old lady was smiling at them. “Hello,
Sirs. How can I help you?” Her voice was a little shaky but it was still
welcoming.
“We would like to take up on that bracelet offer.” Roman smiled at her. He was
really good with grown-up women. There was an immediate change in the lady’s
attitude.
“Of course, honey.” Uhm.. Alright. Could Seth just start calling Roman names
too? “We have them made of silver and of gold. There is also a leather one with
a black aluminum plate worked into it. It’s your choice.”
Seth would have taken the leather one but Roman was quick to pick gold for both
of them. The lady took the measurement of their wrists and Roman paid (again).
“Let me give you some money.” Seth didn’t have a lot but he wouldn’t want Roman
to pay all of this.
“It’s fine. Don’t worry.”
The old lady cut in before Seth could protest. “The engraving will take a
little so I would like to ask you to come back in about two hours. We are open
until 6 pm. If you can’t make it today we will keep the bracelet for a week.
After that, they will be melted down again since we believe you won’t pick them
up anymore.”
“I will be back later.” Roman ensured her and took the bill with their order
number on it. They said goodbye and left the store.
Outside Roman put his arm around Seth’s shoulders. It was.. Unfamiliar. Why did
Roman do that? Did grown-up friends do that? “Thank you.” Seth looked up to
where Roman’s face was.
“No problem. I will pick the bracelets up before I come to your place. Then you
will have it later.” The teen smiled and nod in agreement. On their way back to
the car they passed a McDonalds and decided to both get a milkshake. Luckily
the machine was working. They slurped it until they were back at the car. “You
sure you don’t want me to drive you to school?”
“It’s okay. It’s not far from here, just a five minute walk.” The had stopped
walking now. Seth felt a little awkward because Roman’s arm was around his
shoulders again and held him tight and he didn’t know what to do because on the
one hand he wanted to wrap up in Roman but on the other hand.. He was with Dean
right?
“Alright, big boy.” That name was still hilarious. “Then I will see you later.
Have fun in school.” Roman chuckled and before Seth knew what was happening he
had kisses the top of the teen’s hair. Then the big man sat in the car, waved
at Seth before he drove off.
Hm. What? That was a little weird. Seth was sure it was not a grown up thing.
But then again, he didn’t want to make too much of it. The time with Roman was
great. He had laughed and he felt happy and he was excited to meet him again in
a bit. For now there was no room for Dean in his head. Seth walked back to
school, a little high on ecstasy about the nice lunch break.
 
                                      ---
                                        
“He is a friend of Dean you said?” His mother wasn’t too fond of the idea of
her teen son wanting to bring over yet another older friend. Not because she
didn’t like Seth having friends but it was weird to her that men who were 5 -
10 years older than her kid wanted to hang out with him.
“Yes. You will like him.” Since the teen had started hanging out with Dean so
much Jennifer could tell he was changing. Her baby was growing up slowly. When
they talked about his day he showed more confidence. He smiled more. The
mocking of his siblings didn’t get to him too much anymore. At least not enough
for him to leave the table early or to start crying. It was then that Jennifer
decided that regardless to their age, these men were making her son feel
confident and happy. So they could not be so bad.
The brunette was helping her to put the dishes into the dishwasher while they
were talking. “What are you guys doing when you hang out?” She was a mother.
curiosity was in her nature.
“Uhm..” Of course Seth couldn’t tell all of the truth. He couldn’t tell about
drinking and going to the bar and about making out. “Roman and I both like
video games. We talk about those a lot. And we eat together. Dean and I watch
some wrestling sometimes. He loves showing me some old matches.” It was not a
total lie. That Dean was sucking on his tongue while the television was on,
that his mom didn’t need to know.
“Sounds nice.” They were done with their work and Seth was about to head back
to his room when the door rang.
“I’ll get it!” He yelled before his mom or either of his siblings could even
think about opening the door first. His dad was at work, luckily. Being a chef
included working at the evening often.
Seth walked up to the door and opened it. Hell yeah. Roman looked so handsome.
His hair was in a ponytail so some of the long dark strands fell on his
shoulder. He was wearing a leather jacket and blue jeans. Under the jacket a
sweater. That was necessary in the November weather. “Come in.” Seth smiled and
for a short moment they hugged. This time the Samoan didn’t kiss his head.
He walked his friend to the living room where his mom was putting a new
tablecloth on the living room table. “Mom? Roman is here?”
The moment they entered the room the charming smile was back to Roman’s face.
“Mrs. Rollins?” He reached out his hand to shake her’s. “Nice to finally meet
you. I’m Roman Reigns.” Mom seemed to fall in love with the smile instantly.
“Oh hello. Seth didn’t tell me he was bringing back such a handsome man.”
“Oh my god, mom!” Seth threw his hand over his mouth and blushed.
Roman just chuckled. “Thank you, Miss. I see now where Seth got his pretty
looks from.” Both Rollins family members blushed now.
“Now I am the one who has to thank you.”
“Don’t thank me too early. I came here with a request.” Seth’s mother looked at
Roman like she would say yes to any of his ideas. It was true. Adult women
seemed to love the Samoan. “I am aware that it is a school night but I would
like to take Seth for some pool with my cousin. I will bring him back at what
time you want him home.”
Jennifer was still a little hypnotized but she thought about his words. “I
guess it’s okay but please have him home at ten.”
“Of course.” He nod and then looked at Seth who was now smiling from ear to
ear. “Then go and grab your jacket. I will be waiting here for a moment.” When
Seth left he heard his mom and Roman get into a conversation but he wasn’t
worried one bit about what they were talking.
 
“You’re getting better.” Roman looked at the pool table critically. It was
true. Seth was slowly getting the hang of it. They had been at the Cave for
quite a while now, it was a little before nine now and they would have to leave
in half an hour but Seth honestly had a really great time with Roman and his
cousin. Jimmy had brought his wife Naomi who was really fun to be around. Seth
had almost choked on his laughter when she had started scolding at Jimmy for
cheating during his game against his cousin.
Right now it was Seth versus Jimmy and Roman was still assisting him a little
because the teen was clumsy with the cue stick. The younger man got close to
winning but in the end it was still Jimmy who finished first. He wasn’t
bothered by his loss because he was so happy that he had gotten so much better
with little practice. Roman and he sat down at the bar and Jimmy and Naomi went
to play.
“I’m so happy I can hang out with you guys. Really. I can’t say it enough.” His
smile showed his front gap again. Seth took a sip from his fanta and leaned
against the bar.
“I’m happy to have you here.” Grey eyes looked down at him sincerely. Being
with Roman was really easy. One smile and Seth felt like he couldn’t say one
wrong thing. “Oh before I forget!” Roman grabbed for his jacket and searched
inside the pockets for a moment. He pulled out a small box and handed it over
to Seth. “Here, the bracelet.”
The younger male opened the box and looked at the golden bracelet.  Seth &
Roman  was the engraving. It looked really pretty. Maybe too pretty for him?
The Samoan took the bracelet out of the box for him and grabbed for Seth’s arm.
His palm felt so warm and smooth against his skin and.. Seth quickly blinked
before going down that road of thinking. Instead he watched as Roman attached
the bracelet to his wrist. “I knew gold would fit you.” The older man seemed
proud of his pick.
“Thank you so much, Roman. It looks so beautiful.” The teen looked at the
bracelet on his wrist a little longer before drawing his eyes to Roman’s face.
His heart did something funny and Seth didn’t want to deal with it so he just
stretched to wrap his arms around Roman’s neck. With that the older man seemed
to be satisfied and wrapped his arms around Seth’s middle.
“You’re welcome, big boy.” And there it was again. A kiss to his head. Seth
still wasn’t sure what to make of this.
 
They were sitting in the car together, both singing away loud to a familiar
song on the radio. It sounded absolutely horrible but both males just laughed
about it. Together they were on the way back to Seth’s home, on time of course.
They only stopped singing when Roman put the car in park and turned around to
look at Seth. With shining eyes the younger man looked back at him.
“Alright, I guess I will see you at the show on friday?” Roman sounded full of
hope as if he was really looking forward to seeing the teen. It made his heart
jump for a moment. No! Roman was being friendly and he was asking with the
knowledge that if Seth was coming he would come there with Dean. Oh Dean.. He
hadn’t heard from him all day today. Suddenly Seth wanted nothing more than to
check his phone and see if the blonde had texted him or called. A funny feeling
spread in his lower belly.
“I think so.” He tried not to show his concern now. Roman didn’t seem to pick
up on it anyway and leaned forward to pull Seth into a tight embrace.
“Let me know if you need to be picked up or so. I am off all friday so if you
want to we can also meet early and then go to the show together.” Roman kissed
the top of Seth’s head but he couldn’t get that excited about it now. His head
was with Dean.
“I will let you know tomorrow, okay? Maybe I have to do some homework after
school.” It was a weak excuse but he just wanted to speak to Dean first. Roman
didn’t complain and they said their goodbyes. The older male only drove off
when Seth was closing the door of the house.
Inside his mom was still awake and seemed pleased that he was home five minutes
early. He excused himself and went to his bedroom straight. Dean. Dean. Dean.
The funny feeling in his belly was eating him up by now. It had been so stupid
but he’d gotten so excited about going out for pool that he had left his phone
in his bedroom. Quickly he grabbed it. Oh.. 12 missed calls. 7 text messages.
All from Dean.
Seth quickly opened them.
6:50pm:  Hey sweet cheeks was wondering what you’re up to. I heard Roman is
going out for pool. If you’re up for it we can go together.
6:59pm:  Are you there? Because it’s getting too late if I still have to pick
you up. Also, are you coming to the show friday?
7:36pm:  I guess that’s a no? Are you okay? I can stop by and we can hang out
alone if you want to.
7:44pm:  Why aren’t you replying? If you don’t want to hang out just say so.
8:11pm:  Alright, whatever.
8:34pm:  I stopped by and your mom said you went out with Roman? Interesting.
9:01pm:  Don’t even bother calling when you get back.
Seth’s heart sank into his feet. As he was reading tears starting building in
his eyes. No.. NO! Why did he leave his phone at home?! He was so stupid.
Fucking stupid useless kid. With shaking hands he dialed Dean’s number but it
went straight to voicemail. He started sobbing heavily right away. Why was this
happening? Why couldn’t he have one good day? Not one single day could be okay.
The crying took over and he sobbed heavily enough to make his body shake under
the pressure of the tears. He didn’t know what to do. His heart hurt so bad
that Seth wished he could scream. Again he tried calling Dean. Voicemail again.
The teen was desperate, he needed to hear from Dean, needed to explain and
apologize. He shouldn’t have done it. Not without asking Dean if it was okay to
hang out with his friend or if he wanted to join. But now there was no back.
Seth had messed up the one good thing he had gotten lately.
Because Dean was ignoring him Seth called Roman’s number. It probably wasn’t
the smartest of choices but he needed to tell someone or he would never stop
crying.
“Seth?” It sounded like the other male was still in the car. “What’s up? Did
you forget something in my car?” Before the teen could say anything Roman
picked up on the heavy sniffling. “Are you crying? What’s wrong, big boy?” The
concern in his voice was thick enough to make it shake.
Barely able to speak Seth tried to explain. He had to try several times because
he couldn’t finish his sentences before another sob would come up. After a
couple of minutes he finally got it together.
“Sh, Seth. Calm down. Please, can you do that for me? Take a deep breath in and
hold it for a bit and then breathe out. You need to calm down.” The teen tried.
It helped. What also helped was Roman’s voice. Again. “Look, I told Dean about
going out tonight but he said he wanted to hang out with you so I invited you
too but he didn’t say anything anymore and I thought you guys kind of
communicated this.”
“But we didn’t!” Seth was still upset and his voice was a whine. Roman could
hear the hurt and frustration in the younger male’s voice an he wanted nothing
more than to take away that sound.
“I will drive by his house and fix it, okay? I will go there right now and I
will explain. It’s not your fault. I should have talked to Dean.”
“It’s all my fault. He will never want to see me again.” He started sobbing
more again, breath hectical which gave him hiccups too now.
“No, Seth. Let me speak to him. I know he will call you after that. Promise,
okay?”
“How can you even promise that?” The young man was rubbing his swollen eyes to
get rid of some tears but they kept coming.
“Just.. Let me fix this, okay? Please breathe. Calm down. I will take care of
everything. I will take care of you.” Seth was too upset to pick up on what
Roman had said. “I'll text you later how it went. Try to calm down and sleep a
little. I promise I will make everything okay.”
Before Seth could say anything the Samoan had hung up on him and he was laying
on his bed alone, crying and with the worst pain of all in his chest. 
Chapter End Notes
     Damn, what do you think of this? Leave a comment and let me know!
***** Chapter 11 *****
Chapter Notes
     Two updates in one day? WHAAAAT? I think I'm going crazy. JOKING,
     HAHA! No I am just as excited about this story as you probably are at
     this point. I just want to warn you that this chapter contains a
     paragraph about drinking issues so if you are triggered by that
     please be careful! However, you will learn a lot about what happened
     between Roman and Dean and a bit about why Dean is the way he is.
     ENJOY GUYS!
     Ps: lotsa aaaaangst on the way!
See the end of the chapter for more notes
The bus ride to school took forever. Of course, Seth could have taken the bike,
that would have woken him up at least but he felt exhausted and weak today. Not
for one minute, he had been able to sleep. Even though Roman had asked him to
calm down Seth had cried and cried and cried until there was no water left in
his body to cry out. After that, he’d just laid there and stared into the dark.
It was late at night when Roman had texted him. 4:02 am to be exact. All the
message said was:  It’s okay now.  Seth was still upset. He found no rest. He
still wouldn’t regardless of his body being this exhausted. On top of that, it
was cold as hell outside, his stomach felt sick and if he could he would still
be crying.
In school, Cody tried to speak to him but Seth didn’t want to. He spent the
lunch break alone. How should he cope with this? What if he met Dean again and
he was going to take revenge on him? The teen remembered how Dean’s mood had
scared him two days ago, the memory was still too fresh. It made Seth shake. He
was too scared to call Dean now. Too scared of the punishment he would face for
this.
The rest of his classes went by without Seth really noticing what the teacher
was talking about. No matter how much he tried he wasn’t able to focus. At
least the day was over now and he could go home, back to his bed and be alone.
When he left the building he wasn’t in a hurry. There was nothing to look
forward to anyway. With his head ducked the teen walked towards the bus stop.
He had already missed the first bus but that was okay. It was way too packed
anyway and the next bus would be here in 15 minutes.
“Seth!” The teen didn’t look up when he heard his name being called. He just
wanted to be alone and maybe if he ignored the person he or she would think he
wasn’t who they were looking for. His heavy legs carried him further into the
direction of the bus stop. “Seth!” There it was again and quickly he ducked his
head more, tried to walk a little faster but before he could a heavy hand laid
on his shoulder and pulled him back. “Stop running away.” The voice was sharp
and familiar against his ear. For a moment no one said anything and no one
moved.
“You can’t run away from me.” The voice was sweeter now and now two strong arms
wrapped around his skinny body that was wrapped up in his jeans jacket. Dean
nudged Seth’s ear with the tip of his nose and whispered now. “Please don’t run
away.”
After swallowing hard Seth closed his eyes. Here they came. More tears started
building in his eyes, ran down his face. He waited for it, waited for Dean’s
mood to swing, to push him forward or grab his hair. Instead, though two strong
arms wrapped around him and pulled his body against a strong chest. “You don’t
need to cry. It’s okay.” Dean rested his head on top of Seth’s head but the
teen now, he turned around in the much bigger arms and hugged Dean back. Like
this, he could hide his face in the strong chest as he softly started sobbing.
“I’m so sorry, Dean. I didn’t mean to ignore you it was.. It was an accident.”
His voice was so shaky and muffled because he didn’t take his face out of the
taller man’s chest.
“I know, sugar. Roman explained.” The blonde placed a kiss on top of Seth’s
head. It was funny that for once it was Dean doing this sweet gesture. Not
Roman. And Dean smelled so good too. Like cold smoke and pines and .. A little
bit like beer. The beer wasn’t too enjoyable but the rest was all Dean and the
teen needed that so much in this moment. “I forgive you.” He whispered.
That Dean held him close like this and was being sweet and forgiving helped
Seth to stop crying slowly. If he was completely honest with himself and
listened to the voice from deep down inside of him, he wasn’t sure what Dean
forgave him for. At the end of the day they weren’t dating, he didn’t do
anything forbidden with Roman and he had only forgotten to check his phone for
a couple of hours and Dean went crazy immediately. But Seth pushed these
thoughts far far far away, promised himself he would talk to Dean about this
another time when he wasn’t so upset and when the wound wasn’t this fresh.
“Come on. Let’s go home. I’m sure mom is waiting for you already.” One of his
hands had found Seth’s neck and massaged it for a moment to soothe the teen and
eventually, Dean pulled him away a little bit so he could look down at him and
give him a cheering smile. When Seth didn’t take a step backward so they could
go he cupped the younger male’s face with his hands and pulled him a little bit
up until he was on his tiptoes and Dean could lean down to unite their mouths.
Yes, this was what Seth needed. Dean’s warm lips on his, kissing him and making
everything okay. Slowly and soft their mouths moved together. They didn’t stop
until Seth was breathing normally again and his face had gone all red with
excitement. Once they broke apart Dean gave him half of a smile. “That’s
better, pretty boy. I love your face like this. All blushes because of me. So
beautiful.” He leaned down once more to place a kiss on his forehead. “Now come
on for real. I brought cake.”
“Cake?” Seth’s eyes lit up even more.
“See? I knew you would like that. Because I know you like no one else does.”
The doubts in Seth’s chest told him that actually.. No, they didn’t know each
other so well because everytime something personal could come up Dean would get
into his mood again or he would change the topic. But again Seth swallowed down
the doubts. They were still getting to know each other!
 
“Unfortunately I can’t hang out after the show this week. But we can meet on
Saturday, okay? You can come to my place and stay the night. Friday is just not
going to be a good day for me. I will be running from appointment to
appointment but I will meet you at the show and we will hang out for the rest
of the weekend, okay babe?” Dean mumbled.
The two of them were laying on Seth’s bed and watched a movie. For the teen, it
was a little funny because compared to Dean’s home his bedroom was so full of
childish things. But the older male didn’t complain, he didn’t seem bothered at
all so the teen didn’t bring it up either. “What are you going to do on Friday
after the show?” Seth asked curiously. Since Dean had picked him up he had
calmed down and was just glad they were laying in bed together now, all cuddled
up.
“I have an appointment with some trainers of a higher roster. You know, FCW is
owned by WWE, right?” Seth nod. “They will be scouting a little at the show and
let me know whether I have a chance to go to tryouts for the main roster in the
next months.”
Seth rolled on his belly now so he could look down at Dean with big eyes.
“Really? Dean, that’s so big!” The excitement was clear on his face.
The older male just shrugged though. “It’s still pretty far away for me to go
to the main roster. I know that. But it will be good to hear what I have to
work on. Like that, I can really improve I guess.”
Seth was surprised that Dean didn’t believe in himself. He was so good in the
ring. Of course, his opinion was rather subjective but Dean had many fans and
that spoke for his talent. “I think you can do it, you know.”
The older man shrugged. By now the movie was over too and Dean started
stretching a little. “I have to go now. Is it okay if Roman will pick you up
again tomorrow? I don’t wanna make you wait when I won’t make it in time.”
“Of course. Is it okay if I hang out with him before the show? He said he was
free.” Dean seemed to be thinking for a moment. His eyes showed clear struggle.
Seth already braced for a mood swing, he looked away from the older man,
swallowed hard but instead the blonde took a deep breath.
“It’s okay.” He said shortly. It was obvious to Seth that Dean was struggling
with this decision. The fight against his mood was written all over his face.
His jaw was tense, eyes flickering but before something could happen Dean got
up and grabbed his jacket. They shared a short kiss and then Dean was gone.
 
                                      ---
                                        
“No! Why would you do that! You little shithead!” Roman pushed Seth’s shoulder
and the teen tried not to drop the controller. They were playing Mario Kart
against each other at Roman’s place. It was cleaner and a little bit bigger
here than in Dean’s home and Roman lived more in the city center too. The
furniture was all second hand and the old leather couch had probably seen
better days but it was a place that made Seth feel like home instantly when he
had entered right after school.
Second ago he had pushed Roman’s kart off the rainbow road which caused him to
giggle heavily. It was the last round and Seth let Yoshi race through the
finish line in first place. “Yes! Hell yes! No one can beat me at this!” He
jumped up on the couch and made a little winner’s dance by raising his hands
above his head and jumping on one spot while twirling on that spot. “I am the
master of the rainbow road! I told you so!”
Seth didn’t see the way Roman was looking at him right now. The admiration in
his eyes was so obvious that probably a blind man could have picked up on it.
Grey eyes were focussed on the happy teen and the Samoan wished Seth would
always be like that. Always laughing and jumping around. It made him smile too.
And it made him feel younger. The ten year age gap between the two of them just
vanished.
They had another ten minutes until they wanted to leave for the arena and Roman
had to take upon these minutes. Maybe he wouldn’t get to hang out with Seth
alone for a while after the weekend since the boy had been so upset after what
happened the days before. And especially after the talk he’d had with Dean..
“Dean, stop playing with him. He’s just a kid and he is so in love with you. He
would never understand this.” Roman and Dean were sitting on the couch. The
Samoan looked at his friend in concern. As he had expected Dean was totally
drunk when he had gotten there. Empty beer cans all over the coffee table, a
half-eaten pizza was resting between while some porn was running on mute on the
television. “He is too young for this.”
“It’s his decision to make, Roman. Not yours. I didn’t have to beg him to come
here or to kiss me or to love me. I didn’t ask for it. He keeps coming back.”
His words were a slur.
“Yes because he is a teenager. He’s in love for the first time.” The Samoan had
to be careful not to lose his patience with his wasted friend. “We both know
you can’t control your anger. Especially not when you’re still drinking!” He
was frustrated. Dean and he had had this talk too often. “Look, I know I tell
you this every time but I just want to help you.”
“I’m not going to fucking therapy because I’m not a fucking alcoholic. Everyone
drinks one or two beers at night.” The blonde snapped at him.
“So you think it is normal that you drink all of this-” He gestured towards the
table. “Every night on a daily basis.”
“I didn’t drink when Seth was here. What the fuck do you want Roman?”
The older male shook his head and tried to breathe his own anger away. “I just
want you to be okay, man. You don’t see what the alcohol does to you. This
could end pretty badly sooner or later.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean? You think I will beat the kid up?” The
kid.. Yeah. That’s how Dean saw Seth. Or at least it seemed like it.
Roman swallowed hard and looked Dean dead in the eye. “You did it to me so why
wouldn’t you do it to him?” The anger rising in Dean’s eyes was so clear, even
more obvious now because he had no control over himself when he had thrown back
this much beer. “You can get angry as much as you want with me, Dean. Because I
can hit you back. And I will if you want to go crazy once again. And I will do
it too if you hurt Seth.”
Now the facial expression of the blonde changed. “You like Seth?” His tone was
bitter yet curious. Roman didn’t answer to that. It wasn’t the focus of their
conversation right now. But that was answer enough for Dean. The younger one
started laughing hysterically. “I can’t believe this. You like  MY  boy.”
“He’s not yours as long as you don’t claim him and we both know you never
will.”
“Yet he wants to suck my cock, not yours. So think again.” He was still
laughing at it pissed Roman off.
“I didn’t make a move on him.” Kind of a lie. “And I won’t. This isn’t why I
came here.”
Dean wasn’t listening to him at all. “You’re unbelievable. You’re such a
fucking slut for love. You just want to be loved so badly but no one wants you.
Seth doesn’t. I didn’t. Can’t believe this. Are you going after him to get
revenge on me?”
The Samoan hated this. It had been years that he had confessed his feelings for
Dean. Four years to be exact. But the blonde was still rubbing it in his face
every chance he got. And it hurt. Even though he had accepted that Dean and he
would never be a thing it still hurt because Dean was being such a bitch about
it and he wanted Roman to hurt for him. Dean wanted the whole world to hurt for
him so he could forget his own hurt. “Stop it.”
“Why? Watcha gon do, Roman? Hit me in the face? Come on! I know you want it.”
Dean leaned towards him, presented his face as if he waited for the slap but it
never came. The older male forced himself to be the calm one in this situation.
“I said stop it. I came here to make clear that Seth didn’t go hang out with me
because he didn’t want to hang out with you. I never mentioned you and I just
wanted to cheer him up because he was upset because of your fight the day
before.”
“Wo-ho. Roman Reigns, the knight in shining armor, fixing all the shit I break.
Well god damn, that’s just fucking great.” Dean grabbed a pack of cigarettes
from the table and took one of them out of the small box to light it up and
take a long drag on it. “You just don’t want me to have something good in my
life. Just admit it.”
This was ridiculous. Roman shook his head. “You know well I only want the best
for you. That’s why I try to help you. I want you to be better.”
“I am fucking great, Roman! I’m living the life!”
“Really? Are you? Is getting drunk each night it? Wrestling once a week,
skipping workouts, jumping from bed to bed, is that what you want in your
life?”
“You have no right to judge me for whatever I do with my life. Pay attention to
your own bullshit and stay away from Seth.”
Roman took a deep breath. “Will you forgive him if I do?”
Dean smiled and even laughed a little. “You know what? Yes. I will forgive Seth
if you stay the fuck away from what’s fucking mine.”
“Can I ask for one more thing?” Dean made a hand gesture for him to speak up.
“Don’t make him part of this.” Now he made a hand gesture towards the empty
cans on the table. Dean just rolled his eyes as an answer.
Roman stood up in front of the couch. He was almost as tall as Seth now because
the teen had not grown to his full size yes. His large hands grabbed him by the
waist, pulled him close and he smashed their lips together desperately. For a
moment Seth was so stunned he didn’t do anything but once Roman started moving
his lips against his the teen melted into the touch.
Thank fuck, Roman thought. He kissed Seth softly yet so urgently because he
knew it would be their first and their last kiss. But that was okay as long as
Seth would be okay. He wrapped the younger male up in his arms, rolled his
tongue into the mouth to taste him just once. Just one time he wanted to know
his sweet saliva taste. But before he could decide he could live with them
breaking apart like this Seth already pulled back.
“Roman..” His eyes were big and full of shock and fear. “No.. We can’t.. Dean.”
His voice started trembling, the teen was getting upset but Roman didn’t regret
one second what he had just done.
“It’s okay.” He whispered. For the only time in his life, he ran one hand
through Seth’s dark hair. Everything about him was so innocent. His soft locks,
his brown eyes, his pink lips. Roman’s heart hurt badly at the idea of seeing
all of this for the last time today.
“He is going to be so angry with us.” Seth whispered. The fear was so clear in
his voice it made Roman’s heart ache even more. He had to be the strong one
now.
“He won’t. You don’t have to tell him.” Now he pulled Seth into a tight embrace
to give him some sort of secure feeling and power to go to the show without
breaking in in case Dean should try something funny. “He doesn’t have to know.”
 
They sat in the car quietly. There was no tension but there wasn’t anything to
say either. Seth had a funny feeling in his stomach because everything seemed
like a goodbye with Roman even though he knew it wasn’t. It couldn’t be because
Roman was his friend and he was Dean’s friend too so they would hang out again.
Just now they had a huge secret. Dean could never know about this. He would
kill both of them, Seth was pretty sure about that.
Once the car was parked they sat in the car for a little bit longer and for
quite some time Roman just looked at Seth before he grabbed the teen’s hand and
kissed the back of it. “It’s okay, Seth.” But it wasn’t for Seth because even
if it wasn’t supposed to be like that, that one kiss meant the world to him. It
had felt so right. Everything about being with Roman felt right. And everything
about Roman made him happy. The laughs they shared, the soft and caring
touches, the way they sat together in the car and sang on top of their lungs.
But this funny feeling in his chest told him that that was over now, no matter
how often Roman told him it was going to be okay.
They both left the car to get inside the arena now. Their ways parted quickly
because Seth was off to find his spot in the audience and Roman went to get
changed.
 
The show was over quicker than he had wished. It was the only time that Seth
did not think about the thing with Roman. Wrestling took his mind to a better
and happier place until the show was over and he waited for Dean to come out of
the locker room. The door opened but instead of Dean, it was Roman coming out
of there. He smiled at Seth softly but there was such a weird sadness in his
eyes. Seth wanted to fix it! Maybe it would help if he kissed Roman again. But
he couldn’t do that. No, he was with Dean. Dean who was just a door away from
the two of them.
Regardless of that Roman came over to him. “Waiting for Dean?”
Seth nod. “Yeah. He is going to drive me home.”
Now Roman nod. It was a little awkward right now. “Uh..” The Samoan began.
There was clearly something on his mind but he just wouldn’t spit it out. “You
know if anything happens with Dean again, ever, please don’t hesitate to call
me.”
“Sure.” Seth wanted to say more but now Dean came out of the locker room with
his bag on the shoulder and joined them.
“Hey, sugar.” He smiled sweetly and leaned down to kiss Seth on the mouth. It
was weird to do this in front of Roman but Seth did it still. When they broke
apart he could see the Samoan looking away.
“I’ll see you next week, Roman.” Dean looked at the older man. His eyes were
cold and saying more than his mouth head but Roman agreed and just said a quick
goodbye before leaving them alone.
“Is everything okay with you guys?” Seth asked worriedly. He got a funny
feeling about this whole situation.
“Of course. He’s just in one of his moods.” Oh? So Roman had moods too? Seth
hadn’t noticed before. Dean and he walked to the car.
 
“Sucks that I can’t have you over tonight but the meeting is pretty important
and I can’t bring anyone. Can you believe they reserved a table in a fucking
fancy restaurant?” They were driving by now and Dean chuckled. It made Seth
forget the funny feeling at least a little bit. “I don’t even own a suit. We
will see whether they let me inside.”
“Of course it’s a little sad but I will come over tomorrow and then you can
tell me all about how it went, okay?” Seth was probably more excited than Dean
was.
In front of the house Seth lived in they shared some more kisses. The teen felt
guilty about not telling Dean but Roman had said it was okay. So he tried to
rely on that as he watched Dean drive off to his meeting.
Chapter End Notes
     DONT FORGET TO LEAVE A COMMENT, GUYS! I NEED TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!
***** Chapter 12 *****
Chapter Notes
     PLOT TWIST!
     -- > PLEASE BE AWARE ALL OF THIS IS GOING TO HURT
Seth was so excited to go see Dean. He was so excited he woke up at 8 am even
though he could sleep in that day. There was no rest in the teen’s body. He
wanted to know the news about Dean’s talk with the trainers and he wanted to
hug him and kiss him and congratulate him. Once he had gotten ready he’d packed
his things quickly. The bus he was supposed to take would be at Dean’s place
around 1 pm. Seth knew his lover liked to sleep in so he didn’t want to wake
him up early but maybe Dean would love a little surprise so Seth decided he
would turn up an hour early.
“Please call when you got there save, okay?” Jennifer was still a little
nervous about her son driving to that part of the city alone and with the bus.
So many things could happen.
“Of course mom.” He rolled his eyes but kissed her goodbye. There was a huge
smile on his face and Seth didn’t mind the long bus ride. It had never went by
quicker than today.
With his bag thrown over his shoulder, he stepped outside the bus just an hour
after entering it. Immediately he felt like he was at home. Not because he fit
in so well but this place just had something magical for him. Probably because
it was Dean’s home.
Because it was Saturday it wasn’t surprising to see the kids outside again. For
just a moment Seth stopped. He wanted to take everything in. The grey sky, the
dirty looking houses with the graffiti on the walls, the cold air, the kids
screaming and playing, their mothers yelling at them, the smell of gasoline and
burned plastic that almost burned the insides of his nose. Yeah, he loved
coming here. He loved feeling like home here.
Still wearing the biggest smile on his face Seth went to the entrance that lead
to Dean’s apartment. As always during the day the door was open so he went into
the hallway and upstairs until he was in front of Dean’s door. There was some
nervousness in his stomach. Hopefully, the blonde would be as excited about his
earlier arrival as he was. After taking a deep breath to work up some courage
Seth raised one hand and knocked on the door loudly. Quickly he took a small
step back, not wanting to be in the face of Dean when he opened the door.
For a couple of seconds, he had to wait. Maybe Dean was still asleep? Then he
heard footsteps. His smile grew bigger the closer they came. From the inside
the door was unlocked, the door swung open and Seth wanted to shout “Surprise!”
but the word never left his mouth. Within seconds his guts turned heavier than
any rock on the whole world could be, his mouth went dry and he choked on the
word as he stumbled backward even further.
“Who is it?” That was Dean’s voice but in front of him, he just had a woman
with long brown hair and a body more perfect than any other woman he had ever
seen naked before. And he knew that immediately because she was standing in
front of him in nothing but panties, chewing on a gum lazily. Reby. Reby was in
Dean’s apartment. Naked. She had most likely spent the night here. Naked.
“It’s your little friend. Seth.” She yelled back into the room and gave him a
questioning look. “Do you want to come in?” One of her eyebrows danced up on
her forehead.
Seth could not answer. His mouth was too dry, his chest hurt, his guts made him
feel so heavy and his vision started to get blurry because tears started
swelling up in his eyes.
Now, after what felt like years, Dean appeared behind Reby. He was wearing
boxers only and looked sleepy. “What are you doing here already?” His face
showed clearly that he was pissed off, so much anger in his eyes but Seth
didn’t see it and with all the pain in his heart he probably wouldn’t have
cared anyway.
“Me?” He finally got out, voice louder than necessary. “What is  she  doing
here? And why are you both naked?” The adrenaline and pain rushing through his
veins made Seth feel brave enough to yell this at Dean. “Did you sleep with
her?”
Reby just gave Dean a confused look and the blonde placed one hand on his own
neck, scratching his skin there. For a moment he squeezed his eyes shut as if
he was in pain before he shrugged. “She’s my girlfriend so yeah I slept with
her.”
She’s my girlfriend so yeah I slept with her. She’s my girlfriend so yeah I
slept with her. She’s my girlfriend so yeah I slept with her.  The words echoed
through Seth’s head as if they were words in a foreign language he tried to
understand.
“Kid, I think..”
Seth didn’t let the woman finish her words. “Kid?!” He sobbed. “KID?!” He
looked at Dean as if he expected him to take his side but apparently, he could
expect nothing of the blonde. He still looked at Seth like he wanted to
strangle him right there in the hallway and at this moment Seth wouldn’t have
minded if he did. He wouldn’t have minded to die on the spot. Dean had a
girlfriend. He didn’t love Seth, he loved Reby. The teen was almost certain he
could feel his heart physically break in two.
He didn’t hear exactly what Dean said but he sent the woman inside and stepped
in front of the door towards Seth. “Come here.” He demanded in a sharp voice
but Seth shook his head. There was no point in trying to please Dean. He didn’t
care. He never had. “I didn’t ask, move your fucking ass here.” Dean demanded
more.
When Seth didn’t do it he stepped more into the direction of Seth, grabbed for
his wrist and pulled him forward. “Why did you have to show up early, hm? Did I
tell you to come at one? Why show up an hour early?” Dean’s voice was so angry,
it only caused Seth to cry more. The young man was sobbing by now and the grip
of the taller one hurt and Seth just wanted to leave. But where could he go?
Home wasn’t an option, he would have to tell his mom what happened. Cody? He
would give him the whole ‘I told you so’ speech. “You ruined it, Seth!” Now
Dean’s voice was loud too.
The brunette couldn’t believe Dean was blaming this on him now. He came here
with good intentions, wanted to make Dean happy but now everything was ruined.
“No!” Seth screamed. The loud noises in the hallway didn’t seem to bother
anyone in the building. Not a huge surprise. “I didn’t ruin it! You did!
Because you cheated on me!”
“Cheated?” Dean was almost laughing now and Seth smelled alcohol in his morning
breath. It made him flinch away just as much as the loud tone. “I was never
your boyfriend, Seth.”
“Let me go!” Seth didn’t stand a chance in a fight against Dean. A fight wasn’t
even what he wanted. He just wanted to be away. Everything hurt, inside and
outside. “Let me go!” He demanded again. With all of the strength he had in his
little body Seth ripped his wrist free and grabbed his bag from the floor.
Never in his whole life had he run so quickly. He hurried down the stairs and
luckily Dean didn’t follow.
But he yelled after him. “You’re running Seth! You can’t run from me! You know
it!” The words scared Seth to death and almost blind he stumbled out of the
building. Away. He needed to be far away. Still as quick as possible he ran
towards the bus stop but he had no patience to wait for a bus so he ran to the
next bus stop and the next and when he got to the next one he was so exhausted
that he just sat down on the sidewalk, hugged his bag and tried to breathe
between the sobs and exhaustion.
Where should he go? There was no safe place. Nowhere he could go without having
to explain himself to someone nowhere but..  You know if anything happens with
Dean again, ever, please don’t hesitate to call me.  The thick voice hammered
inside his head like a drill and it made him squeeze his eyes shut for a bit.
He had no clue if there were people around him because his whole surrounding
felt white. There was no other way to explain it but Seth in that moment felt
so lost and alone that there was nothing around him.
With shaking fingers Seth started digging around in his bag. Phone. Phone.
Where the heck was the phone? There finally! He pulled it out and pressed some
random buttons in the process. Still, he couldn’t see properly so he took off
his glasses for a moment and rubbed his eyes. The few seconds he got until new
tears came he used and dialed the well-known number. When he pressed the mobile
phone against his ear Seth knew he wouldn’t get out many words but he needed to
try if he didn’t want to sleep out here.
“Hey, Seth, what’s up?” Roman’s voice sounded so relaxed and Seth felt a little
ashamed to call the Samoan this upset for the third time this week. Crazy..
There had been not one normal day this week. Everything was messed up. Seth’s
whole life was messed up. The older male seemed to pick up on the noises on the
other end of the line immediately. “Seth? What’s wrong?”
“Dean!” He just whimpered and he heard Roman moving around.
“Where are you?” His voice was hard now, expressing a mix of anger but also of
concern.
“I don’t know. I just ran.” He sobbed and rubbed his eyes again with the free
hand.
“Seth, big boy, try to breathe for me. I’m on my way. Do it like the last time
you called me. Take a deep breath. In and out.” Roman was already putting on
his shoes as they spoke.
“I can’t!” Seth’s voice was trembling heavily. He was too upset to concentrate
on breathing.
“Baby, please. Please look around you if you see a street name or a bus stop.”
The older male was almost begging now.
Bus stop! Seth was at a bus stop! With his shaky fingers, he put the glasses
back on his nose and tried to find the name of the bus stop. “I’m at the bus
stop St. Martin Hospital.” His body was shaking because of the sobs by now.
“Hold on, Seth. I will be there in no time.”
“Please hurry!” His voice broke under the tears and he hung up on Roman, just
hugging his bag and waiting for the time to pass. It seemed to take forever.
The teen felt exhausted but his body wouldn’t stop shaking, tears wouldn’t stop
falling down his cheeks.
From a far distance, he heard someone saying his name. Again and again but he
felt dizzy and sick and he didn’t have the strength to look up. Strong arms
wrapped around his rolled up body and he was pulled into a strong and warm
chest. Roman lifted him up with ease and carried him inside the car. From then
on everything was a blur until he found himself on the leather couch, wrapped
up tightly in a warm and protecting embrace.
“I’m here, Seth. I’m right here.” The deep voice was shaking too a little but
the body next to his was steady. A big hand rubbed his back softly and he felt
hot breath hit his head. His fists grabbed into Romans shirt. “It’s okay.” Soft
kisses hit the top of his head but nothing was okay. Not for Seth.
He cried and cried and Roman held him for hours without ever once complaining
or forcing him to speak. At one point Seth was so exhausted he just fell
asleep. He couldn’t do anything about it. His eyes closed and for a little
while, he didn’t feel anything anymore.
 
When the teen opened his eyes everything was dark around him. Dark but not
cold. Even though his body hurt in every spot and his heart felt like it was
barely beating, Seth was not cold. And he was not alone. A strong body was
wrapped around him, hiding him from the world as if it could protect him from
all evil. But the evil had already found him and it had broken his heart.
He didn’t say anything. He couldn’t, not even if he wanted to. His mouth was
too dry, he would choke on his words. Roman was right there and he wasn’t
asleep. Seth felt that immediately because the man holding him was whispering
soft things into his ear. “I will make it all okay. I will fix it all. Nobody
will hurt you ever again.” Regardless of the sweet words Seth’s heart still
felt heavy. Nothing in the world could ever fix him, nothing and no one could
take his pain out of his body. He’d been broken in the worst possible way and
he felt it in the bottom of his heart, nothing could ever make it okay again.
When he swallowed hard Roman seemed to notice that he woke up. “Seth?” He asked
softly but didn’t move. Instead of speaking the teen wrapped his weak arms
around the much bigger body. The older man seemed to understand and hugged Seth
a little bit tighter. “I’m right here, big boy. I’m not leaving.” As earlier
that day Roman started rubbing his back. “I won’t go away.” His voice sounded
promising and sincere and Seth wanted to believe in his words but his life had
provided proof once again today: Seth was nothing but a little boy. No one
would stay with him. Not forever.
Eventually, he managed to move his head a little. Opening his eyes hurt and he
probably looked terrible because he could feel that all of his face was
swollen. Roman turned his head too a bit so their eyes could meet. The concern
on the Samoan’s face was real. Quickly the older male reached out and grabbed a
bottle of water. “Seth, please drink some water, okay? I think you lost all
liquid that your body ever had.”
It was a little hard for Roman to open the bottle without letting Seth go but
he managed and then helped him to sit up a little bit so Seth could drink. The
water felt better than he had expected. The young male took a couple of sips
before he was done. Roman wanted to put away the bottle but the second he
leaned just a little bit away from him Seth grabbed for his warm body again.
The strong arms landed back on his body and Roman kissed his forehead. “I’m so
sorry, Seth. I wish I could have protected you from this. No matter what he
did, I wish I would have been there before all of this happened so you wouldn’t
have gotten into this.”
His voice was so soft, soothing the pain in his head at least a little bit. His
heart and guts though were still heavy. “Look, big boy, you don’t have to tell
me now what happened. Maybe it’s good if you rest some more.”
The teen shook his head. He would get no rest. He knew that already. When his
body felt like this, when his mind felt like this, he would never be able to
sleep. Hell, sometimes he couldn’t sleep after a little fight with his
siblings, this whole messed up situation would sure as hell keep him up the
rest of the night. “Can I have more water?” His voice hurt when he spoke.
“Of course.” Immediately Roman grabbed for it with one hand and while Seth was
drinking more he ran his fingers through the dark hair. For some more minutes,
they just sat there like this in the dark of Roman’s bedroom, wrapped up into a
tight hug, Roman massaging Seth’s skull as he hoped it would soothe the teen a
little bit.
“I went to surprise Dean today.” His voice was just a whisper, the memory too
fresh, the wounds cut too deep. “You know we wanted to spend the weekend
together and I thought he’d be happy to have an hour more with me. I would have
been so happy to have just one more hour with him.” His head was so heavy and
fell against Roman’s shoulder as he kept going. It hurt to say out loud what
had happened but it hurt, even more, to keep it to himself.
“I walked up to the apartment and knocked on the door. His girlfriend opened
the door for me. And then Dean blamed me. I fucked it up, Roman. I came there
early and now I destroyed everything and..” The older male shook his head in
disbelief. “Roman he scared me so much. He was yelling at me and his eyes and
voice were so wild and he said he was going to get me, that I could never run
from him and it is.. It is all my fault.”
His young bod tried to sob but no tears left his eyes. He was all dried out.
The Samoan couldn’t believe what Dean had done. He was such a jerk. Just two
days ago Roman had promised to stay away from Seth if it meant the blonde
wouldn’t hurt him and not even 48 h later the pretty boy’s heart was broken.
“I’m so sorry, Seth.” Roman was rocking the young body back and forth softly.
“I’m so sorry I couldn’t tell you before. There is no excuse for this. I knew.
All the time I knew but I couldn’t tell you. You wouldn’t have believed me.”
Seth didn’t blame Roman. It was true. Whenever someone had tried saying
something negative about Dean he got really defensive immediately. No one could
have made him believe this. Not even with the doubts he’d had. “Let’s lay down,
baby. I think.. I guess now is a good moment to tell you everything. To tell
you the real story.”
***** Chapter 13 *****
Chapter Notes
     Alright my people, after I did a great job at breaking all of our
     hearts it's time to finally understand what's going on with Dean.
     Please note, in this chapter I mention: prostitution, alcoholism, and
     violence. Skip if it triggers you. Stay if you like the pain.
     Also wtf? Did I write 4 chapters in a day? I am so excited about this
     story. It is truly the first one I truly planned through till the end
     and regardless of the huge plot twist we still got a hell of a ride
     ahead of us.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
They did lay down. Seth rested his head on Roman’s chest and closed his eyes
because they hurt so much. Not at one second, the older male let him go. With
his soft voice, Roman started the story from the very beginning. “When Dean and
I met for the first time we were still finishing school. He was this wild kid
with all these crazy ideas and all the nonsense he could talk but he was also
fun to be around. He always had a joke on his lips. That was in eighth grade or
so. We were still kids back then. We quickly grew to be friends. I was a really
quiet child back then.
My family comes from Samoa, you know, and my parents always expected a lot of
me and they especially expected me to have the same opinions as they did. So
this meant that at that time my goal was to go to high school, then university
and become the next big thing in football. But it also meant that I often
didn’t dare to voice my own opinion. It changed when I met Dean. His crazy
energy rubbed off on me so quickly that soon I didn’t want all of these things
my parents wanted anymore. I wanted to be everything but not a football player.
Dean gave me a lot of courage and I even dared to tell this my parents. But
that’s actually not what this is about. The point is, Dean and I became close
friends many years ago.
It was quite some time later, we had just started high school, that Dean’s
attitude changed slowly. He was more aggressive and he hung around with funny
people. Those kind of people that make you switch the sidewalk. He was still so
young you know, but these people were grown-ups. People who dropped out of
school and lived on the streets and when I would ask him who they were he would
tell me they were people of his mom’s new husband. I hadn’t even known Dean’s
mom had gotten married again.
What I did know was that they were poor. Very poor. It never bothered me but it
was then that I started seeing Dean drift off into this typical vicious circle,
you know. He would come to school late if he came in at all. We were like 15 or
16 back then, you know, but he went out to drink every weekend. When I would
ask if he wanted to hang out he would always tell me he couldn’t because he was
working. And when I asked for whom he told me he worked for his stepdad. Our
tight friendship fell apart slowly and after we graduated Dean was gone. He
was.. I don’t even know where he was. Not even today. But I remember the last
time I saw him before that. I was on my way home after a meeting of us kids who
created the yearbook and he was hanging around outside of school, completely
drunk. You know, me being his friend I was worried and I went to look and ask
if he was okay. I hear his voice saying these words until today.  If you won’t
let me suck your cock for $50 then I have nothing to offer for you, Roman .”
The sound of his voice was so bitter, so full of anger too. Seth remained very
silent.
“It was just then that I came to realization, what exactly he had to do for his
stepdad. Before all of this had started Dean once told me as a secret that his
mom had a small problem with alcohol and sometimes he would get scared when she
started ranting at him whilst being drunk. Back then I didn’t understand
everything. I was an innocent kid, a little bit like you. My parents always
protected me from everything.
Anyway, Dean and I didn’t meet for three years. He was nowhere to be found and
I went to university take on a football scholarship after all. Without the
courage Dean gave me I couldn’t resist my parent’s wish. The way I did meat
Dean again was a huge surprise to me because one night he just stood in front
of the door of my dorm and knocked on the door like nothing had ever happened.
But he didn’t look like nothing had happened. He was skinny and pale and
smelled horrible.” The older one chuckled a little at the memory but went back
to being serious quickly. Seth’s heart ached at the story Roman told him.
Regardless to the harm Dean was causing him, no one deserved this. Selling his
body.. He had been a kid still.
“I took him in my room and I was there for him. I gave him a place to sleep for
several nights, I fed him when he was too weak to eat. But at one point I
wasn’t able to keep up with university anymore. I had to pick. Dean or school.
Because I didn’t see myself being able to make this decision by myself I talked
to Dean about it. Who else? And he begged me not to leave him alone. Begged me
not to send him away. And so I didn’t. I dropped out. My parents went crazy on
me. I can’t count the amount of times my dad called me a disgrace for the
family but it was okay. Because I had Dean, my best friend.
I found a job after I dropped out and was able to rent a small apartment for
Dean and I. Actually it’s the apartment he’s still living in. Nothing about it
was perfect. In the beginning, all we had was a mattress on the floor, a tiny
old television and a fridge. It didn’t bother me because Dean was so thankful.
Oh Seth was he thankful. He left out no chance to tell me that and he kept
talking about me being his savior who dragged him out of hell. One night I
asked what his hell had looked like.” He paused. “Please tell me if this story
is getting too much?”
“I want to hear it.” Seth whispered. He had buried half of his face in Roman’s
chest. The familiar smell made it a little bit easier to breathe normally
again.
“Alright.. Well apparently Dean’s stepdad and his mother too had a rather big
issue with alcohol. There was no time that they weren’t drunk. And this habit,
this addiction, it was expensive too. And since both of them were too drunk to
go to a job it was Dean who had to bring home some money. And because a job as
a waiter didn’t pay enough he was forced to offer services. Man, I think we sat
on the couch quietly crying together for two days or so. I wanted to kick my
own ass for not being there to save him earlier. Guilt was almost eating me up
but Dean kept assuring me that it wasn’t my fault. Today I know it wasn’t. But
back then.. I just wanted Dean to be okay. And from then on for a while he was.
Once he was healthy again we decided he could find a job too and maybe a year
later we could move out of that flat to a better part of town. And living
together with Dean, sharing a bed with Dean, laughing with Dean.. All of it, it
made me fall for him. I fell so quick so heavy. For me Dean was it. I couldn’t
imagine ever being with someone else. Our life was miserable, working day in
and out, but at least we had each other you know. We were just 21 and 23 back
then. It’s been four years.
Anyway, Dean started looking for jobs but it was hard because his grades at the
end of high school had been so low, he barely graduated and then he didn’t do
anything for so long so no one really wanted to deal with him. And you know
Dean a little, he has no patience for anything. Things have to happen now or he
doesn’t want them. And since he didn’t find a job quickly he didn’t want one
anymore. While I was busting my ass each day he stayed home. The more
frustrated he got the more he turned back to alcohol and the more aggressive he
got. I kept telling myself it would just be a phase. He would be okay. I just
needed to be there for him. But he would shut me out whenever I tried to. At
one point he started sleeping on the couch instead of in our bed and to be
honest I wasn’t too bothered because I didn’t exactly love the way he stank of
booze and cigarettes when he came to bed late at night, trying to fuck me even
though he was too drunk to get it up anyway.
I tried to save Dean again but at one point I was exhausted. We were fighting
most of the times, Dean was so angry, always so angry. The smallest things
would upset him and he would turn into a lunatic, accusing me of things I never
did. And then one night when he wasn’t all too drunk to hear me I tried to
speak to him. I had a whole game plan how I would convince him to stop drinking
because his aggression scared me. It was only a matter of time until things
would get violent. The issue with that wasn’t that I couldn’t defend myself. I
was already into wrestling and trained every weekend. But I didn’t want to. It
didn’t want to hurt Dean. Because I was in love with him.
So I sat down with Dean and tried to talk to him. Tried to convince him to let
me help him, to let someone professional help him because his behavior wasn’t
normal and I told him:  Dean, I love you. Please. I want you to be better. I
miss you.  And he laughed right into my face.” Again his voice turned bitter
and Seth started to understand, Roman could relate to his pain. He was also
feeling it. He was feeling the same pain and he too could never be fixed again.
“The more I tried to talk sense into him the more he would laugh until he
finally snapped. Aggression took over. He beat me down pretty bad. My jaw was
broken, my body covered in bruises yet, I loved Dean. And I just wanted him to
be okay because this, that monster that beat me up, that wasn’t Dean.
When I got released from the hospital I went back to our home. Not one second
did Dean show me he was sorry. So I packed my bags and left. It was the hardest
thing I ever did in my life, even telling my parents I wanted to leave
university wasn’t that heart but that.. It broke my heart into two.
Now Dean was left to deal with the money for the apartment alone because I
immediately went to get my own place. And because this Dean, the person he is
now, is this crazy man he hunted me down. He got into wrestling and made sure
that I would get reminded every week of what I had left behind. This crazy
attitude sadly is something that works well in the ring. So unlike me, who had
been training for quite a while by then, he got into the business so easily.
Two years ago he and I got into FCW. We started making actual money with
wrestling. For the sake of being a professional, I tried to make up with Dean.
I apologized and so did he. But our friendship was never able to grow back to
where it once was. Too much had happened. Too much shit went down between Dean
and I.”
“I’m so sorry, Roman.” Seth whispered now, held on so tight to Roman. Both of
their hearts were broken by the same man. And that man did not give a flying
fuck about it.
“Don’t be. I should have told you all of this earlier. I could have protected
you.” Guilt was heavy on Roman’s chest too. “That first night that Dean brought
you back to The Cave I knew this wouldn’t end well. I couldn’t.. I didn’t.. I
should have protected you, Seth. I’m so sorry.”
Seth clung to the strong body. “It’s not you who hurt me. You never had bad
intentions with me. I know.”
“Look at you, Seth. So smart. You’re so beautiful. You will be able to rule the
world one day, I know it.” Roman raised his head for a moment to place a kiss
on top of Seth’s head.
“Is he still drinking?” Seth asked. His voice was so quiet, lacked all life and
Roman hated that sound.
“Yes. A lot. He is going down the same road as his mother and I hate having to
watch it. It’s not going to be long until he will lose his spot on the FCW
roster. The coaches told him just last night. He’s lost you too. I know it
because I know how it feels.”
Seth was quiet for long. Then he whispered. “He’s not lost you.”
And at that Roman laughed a bitter laugh. “He doesn’t care about that. You know
the night when we went for pool and he went crazy because you didn’t answer
your phone? I went to see him and as expected he was damn wasted.” Roman told
Seth the story of what had happened in Dean’s flat. “He doesn’t need me around.
Hell, he doesn’t want me around! He doesn’t want to hear that he needs help. I
can’t save him. I couldn’t save you.” The tall man shook his head. “I can’t
save anyone.”
Both were quiet for a little, just holding each other, trying to comfort each
other regardless of the pain each man felt. Eventually, Seth spoke up. “My dad
once told me that we don’t have to save anyone but ourselves. I think it was
when I was bullied because of .. Well ya, the way I am. He told me not to rely
on others because we can only truly count on ourselves.”
They didn’t speak more after that. Both were exhausted Roman because for the
first time in his life he opened up to someone. Seth because of what had
happened during the day. Filled with deep sadness they stayed awake the whole
night until the sun started coming up. Even then they didn’t get up. Both
eventually fell asleep.
 
The week went by like a movie. Each day was just a picture in his memory. And
then it was Friday again. “Is Dean picking you up for the show?” Jennifer asked
softly during dinner. She had picked up on Seth’s depressed mood lately. Her
son had never been this bad. She just guessed it had to do with the weekend
Dean and he spent together, maybe they had a fight but ever since then Seth was
quiet. He didn’t mention Dean anymore.
“No. If it’s okay I will go with Roman. I want to stay until Sunday.” It was an
indirect question.
Jennifer couldn’t tell her son no considering his mood. It would probably do
him good to go outside. It would be the first time in this week, not counting
in school time. Once dinner was over Seth went to pick up his things. No bell
rang this time. “I’ll be back Sunday.” He poked his head into the kitchen for
just a moment before he left the house. Mom was quick to get into the living
room to see if he was really going to meet Roman outside. Of course, he was.
Her son would never lie to her. It was a funny picture to see his little figure
wrap up in the much bigger guy in front of his car so desperately. Something
was definitely up but she wouldn’t push him to tell her.
Outside Seth went to sit inside Roman’s car. “How have you been?” The older
male asked. He had caught himself much better than Seth. Maybe because he lived
with this feeling for longer now.
The teen shrugged. “Depressed. You?”
Roman reached out and put his hand on top of Seth’s as they drove off. He would
drop him off at his place before heading to the show. There was no reason for
Seth to be in the same building as Dean, not when he could barely say his name
without starting to cry.
“I’ve been fine. Don’t worry about me.” Quiet for a moment. It hurt Roman badly
to see Seth like this. “I went shopping earlier and I bought snacks and a new
game for the PlayStation in case you get too bored.”
“I think I will be fine.” Seth would be fine with just laying in Roman’s bed
and staring at the ceiling until he was back from the show. They held hands
during the rest of the ride but didn’t speak. Not until Justin Timberlake’s Cry
Me A River turned up on the radio. Oh, sweet irony. It was the older male who
started humming along first. As if it was natural Seth joined soon. By the time
the first chorus hit both men were singing along. It wasn’t as happy as usual
but at least it wasn’t quiet anymore. When the song was over Seth looked at
Roman who was focussed on the road. Maybe.. Just maybe with Roman in his life
things could get a little bit better day by day. Maybe when he was with Roman
he could smile again. He cared for the older mal so much and he knew Roman was
the same. They had both felt it before the whole thing with Dean happened and
both men knew they were glad to have each other in this time.
“Alright, big boy.” Funny Roman still called him that. Seth had never felt
smaller than he did these days. “Text if you need anything, okay?” They hugged
before their ways parted.
 
                                      ---
                                        
Seth laid on the leather couch with a bag of chips on his belly and the
controller in his hands when Roman came back. He paused the game immediately
and sat up. Being depressed was no reason to forget his manners, right? The
Samoan seemed tired and exhausted and Seth felt worry creeping up in his belly
but as soon as their eyes met the older one gave him a soft smile. “Hey there.”
Roman walked to the couch to sit down with Seth. “Hey.” He said too and scooted
right next to Roman. “Tired?”
The Samoan nod. Then he wrapped an arm around Seth’s shoulders and pulled him
tight against his side. Soft kisses landed on his temple. “Missed you.”
“Missed you too.” Seth whispered back and it wasn’t a lie. Both men knew they
weren’t speaking of the four hours that Roman had been gone. They had not heard
from each other all weak other than a couple of texts so being able to hold and
comfort each other again now felt really good.
“Wanna order some pizza and fall asleep while watching a movie?” Roman
suggested as he ran his fingers through Seth’s hair again. He really seemed to
have a thing for that.
“I can’t imagine anything more perfect right now, to be honest.” The younger
male admitted. Being around Roman really did make everything hurt a little
less. And Seth decided that even if for the rest of their lives the two of them
would just be depressed together, he would never want to let Roman down. The
older man gave him so much, there was barely a way he would be able to give it
back to him. Before he could get up to get his phone Seth wrapped his arms
around Roman so tight that he probably choked him but he needed this now,
needed to tell him now.
“Thank you.” He said. “Thank you for putting up with this. For putting up with
me.”
“Don’t thank me.” Roman hugged him back. “I will fix this. I will make
everything okay.” Roman kept saying this one thing again and again for two
weeks now. He had said it even before the thing had happened. And today was the
first day that Seth was able to put some belief in his words.
Chapter End Notes
     They deserve something good after all of this, don't they? Please
     tell me you do. Leave your opinion in the comment section!
***** Chapter 14 *****
Chapter Notes
     Okay, you put up with all of that pain so let's give our babies at
     least a little bit good before we deal with the aftermath of Dean's
     behavior. At this point, I also want to thank everyone who stuck with
     this story. I'm very happy with every response I get from you guys!
     Enjoy this chapter and have a good start to the weekend with this
     beautiful piece of FLUFF!
The teen woke up to the smell of coffee and fresh buns.The smile reminded him a
little bit of Saturday mornings at home. His mother would prepare breakfast for
her kids and they would sit in front of the television and eat all together. Or
at least they did that when they had all been younger and still got along with
each other. Things were different now.
Dressed in his plaid pajama and a way too big shirt that belonged to Roman Seth
rolled out of bed. The bedroom was very small, there was only the bed in here,
nothing else. But that was okay because what else would you need in a bedroom?
All the other furniture was in the living room or the kitchen and a little bit
also in the bathroom. The wardrobe for example because it didn’t fit in here.
It was a little bit funny that the bathroom was bigger than the bedroom.
The wood under his feet was a little bit cold when he emerged the bedroom and
before going to find Roman Seth went to the bathroom to empty his bladder and
brush his teeth. His hair he left hanging from his head in a mess because he
wanted to shower after breakfast anyway. With sleep still in his eyes, he went
to the kitchen where he head Roman shuffling around. “Good morning.” He rubbed
one of his eyes as he stood in the door.
Dressed in sweatpants and a sweater Roman turned around from where he was
mixing eggs with milk and cheese for some scrambled eggs. The look Roman gave
him hit the teen now. When the tall male laid his grey eyes on him the
concentration and sadness there was all gone. The corners of his mouth went up,
his nose wrinkled a tiny bit because of that and his face looked alive more
than ever. A beautiful sight to wake up to and regardless of how sleepy Seth
still was he also had to smile. Even though he didn’t want to make the
comparison, because it was stinging in his heart, this kind of waking up was
such a welcomed difference to when he woke up with Dean and almost peed the
bed.
“Hey.” Roman let the bowl with the eggs be a bowl with the eggs for a moment
and came to meet Seth in the middle of the room for a short but tight embrace.
“Did you sleep fine?” He asked when he grabbed a kitchen towel to wipe his
hands clean. Seth, in his sleepy head just nod and tried to peak around Roman
to see what he was preparing other than eggs. The Samoan picked up on it. “I
was about to make some eggs for us and I went to get fresh buns and some stuff
to eat with them and..” He then turned around and grabbed something from the
kitchen counter. “And I brought you these.” When he turned around he was
holding a bouquet of different colored flowers. “They are ..” For a moment he
struggled to find the right name. “Chrysanthemums.” The smile on his face grew
wider when he got the name correct.
Seth stepped up to take the bouquet from Roman’s hands. The flowers were in
many different colors: white, red, pink, orange, yellow, darker red and purple.
Because he felt a little bit like he just dove into a love movie Seth couldn’t
help but stick his nose into the flowers for a moment and smell them. When he
turned back to look at Roman he smiled wide enough to show the gap between his
teeth again. “These are beautiful.” He grinned. “I love them.” Seth reached out
with his free arm to hug Roman’s neck again. Unlike usually, it was now Seth
who places a kiss on Roman’s cheek and then to his temple. “Thank you. I love
them.”
“You’re welcome.” Roman smiled back. “You can find a vase in the cupboard
there.” Seth did so and put the flowers in some water before carrying them over
to the living room. Here he placed them on the table which he then started to
help setting. The living area of Roman was smaller than in Dean’s place but
that was probably because his bedroom was separate too. When the table was set
they sat down together to start the breakfast. In that moment the world felt
okay. For the first time in days, Seth felt okay. He didn’t have a headache, he
didn’t feel sick and most important, he didn’t feel like he would start crying
any second. “I love your home.” Seth admitted as he sipped a bit of juice. “I
wish I could have a pretty home like this.”
Roman looked around with a bit of a frown on his face. This place wasn’t
exactly beautiful with the non-matching furniture and the small spaces. “Maybe
you can have something like this when you’re done with school.” He shrugged and
gave Seth a cheering smile.
“Sure if my parents ever let me move out.” The teen giggled a little. “I think
they believe I couldn’t take care of myself.”
Now Roman joined the soft laughter. “Parents are always like that. When I first
moved out my mom used to show up every day and bring me some of the food she
made for dad and her. She would come into my dorm and start making my bed,
cleaning the floor and everything.”
Both grinned about that. “Does she still come here sometimes?” Seth asked then.
Roman shook his head. “We haven’t talked for a while. My parents only call
twice a year. For my birthday and Christmas. I told you about the fight with my
dad after the whole thing with Dean.”
“That’s so sad. Don’t you miss them?” Seth got busy putting butter on half of a
bun.
“Sometimes. But I’m used to it.” He shrugged. “I wasn’t close to them before
because of all the expectations. So I feel like I didn’t have a real family
until I got into wrestling and met people there who believed in me. There’s
this guy, I’ll introduce you maybe someday, his name is Steve Austin and he was
more father to me than my own dad really ever was. I didn’t have a family until
I stepped into the ring.”
Seth felt sorry for Roman that he felt like this about his family. Even though
he fought with his siblings all the time, Seth loved his own family. His
parents were so loving and caring and supported everything he wanted to do.
“And now you have also me.” He tried to cheer up the mood again.
At that Roman’s face got brighter immediately. “Yeah. Now I got you.” Both fell
quiet for a moment. Seth felt too shy to add something and Roman seemed to try
finding good words to say. “You know..” He was still struggling a little. “I
had to promise Dean not to make a move on you and I tried to distance myself
from you but Seth..” Struggle. “I really like you. I love having you around. I
love the way you sing with me in the car and how you dance around when you beat
me in gaming. It’s really good to have you around. And I will fix everything so
you can be that happy every day.”
The younger male was slightly surprised by what Roman said but the words
encouraged him. He’d fought this battle inside his heart for long enough. He
tried to tell himself he did not like Roman the way he liked Dean but if he was
honest with himself and if he stopped pushing down the doubts all the time, he
knew losing Roman would hurt just as much as losing Dean. And being with Roman
made him happy just like it had with Dean (most of the time). “I like you too,
you know.” His cheeks were heating up. Yeah, even with the confidence he gained
from the older male this still happened. Some part of him would probably always
be that awkward kid.
For a moment they smiled at each other and under the table, their feet met. The
blush on Seth’s cheeks got darker when Roman tangled their legs. His next words
he tried to chose even more carefully. “You know.. A lot of shit went down last
week but.. I mean you kind of know where I stand but do you also like Dean?”
Seth stopped smiling slowly. The butterflies in his stomach turned into rocks
again and he shrugged. “I guess but..” He didn’t know how to express what he
was thinking.
“I know.” Now Roman put his hand on Seth’s wrist softly. “I understand. Dean
is.. He’s a great man. Unless he drinks.” The teen agreed with a nod.
“I wish we could help him.” Seth’s voice was only a whisper now.
Roman’s eyes agreed with him but he took a deep breath and sighed. “You know..
We can only help him if he wants help to get better. And I have been trying for
years. But he doesn’t believe he has a problem.”
“We will figure something out, Roman.” Seth knew they would. If both of them
loved Dean they would find a way to help him get better.
“I told you, I will fix everything.” The older man grabbed Seth’s hand fully
now so he could place a soft kiss on his palm.
But the younger one shook his head. “No, Rome. We will fix this.”
 
                                      ---
 
“Romaaaaaaaan! How many times more do we have to do this?” Seth threw his head
back against the backrest of the couch. He was exhausted from playing Mario
Kart almost all day by now. They had hit the rainbow road for about 20 times
now.
“Until I beat you!” The Samoan seemed to be on a mission.
“Okay, I will let you win next round so we can finally do something else.”
“No! You can’t just let me win. That’s not what I want.”
“Please.. You know you could never beat me!”
“Can do.”
“Cannot.”
“Can!”
“Cannot!”
“Can!”
“Stop it! You can’t!” Seth was giggling now. Roman was so determined to beat
Seth in this game but there was no chance in hell anyone on this planet would
win a race on the rainbow road against him.
“Brat!” Roman took the controller from Seth’s hand and pulled him towards his
bigger body to start tickling his sides.
“NO!” Seth yelped and almost jumped away from Roman but the older man held him
tight with one arm and tickled him some more with the free hand. “Stop! Please
stop!” Seth was laughing so hard that quickly his belly hurt.
“Say please, big boy. Where are your manners?” Roman was laughing too but he
didn’t stop.
“Please, please, please stop!” Eventually Roman did as he was asked but he
still held on to Seth and for a moment they just smiled at each other. “You’re
so handsome, Roman.” Seth eventually dared to giggle and felt his face going
red with it. “Like.. Sooo beautiful.”
“Thank you.” The older one seemed to take great pride in that compliment. “But
so are you, big boy.” One of his hands found its way into the dark hair of
Seth. It smelled like his shampoo now, he knew that because Seth had showered
earlier. “Come here.” Roman pulled a little bit on the hair, not enough to make
it hurt, and guided Seth’s face towards his. Their mouths met into a soft kiss.
The touch was innocent like everything else about Seth and Roman sighed happily
about this feeling. He laid back and pulled Seth on top of his body just to
feel his weight against his as their mouths moved together.
For Seth, it was a little overwhelming. Roman was only the first person in his
life he kissed and he tasted of the chips they had been eating and of himself
and that got to Seth’s heart immediately. It was different than to all kisses
he had shared with Dean because Roman’s kisses were so much softer. There was
no biting or force behind it and his hands stayed in Seth’s hair and on his
back to just hold him close. It was obvious Roman didn’t kiss him because of
any sexual intentions but just to underline the statement both had shared
earlier.
For quite a moment they just laid there and kissed until both needed to
breathe. The older male then tucked the younger brunette’s head under his chin
and nuzzled into the dark locks. No one said anything for a little bit until
Roman’s thick voice filled the room again. “Bet you couldn’t beat me in a real
race.”
Seth giggled. “Of course not. I can’t drive a car.”
“You can’t drive a car? Why? You’re 17.”
“Because.. I don’t know. I’m a bit afraid. I think I would kill someone if let
loose on the streets with a car by myself.”
Now it was Roman laughing. “I think almost everyone had this fear. But being
able to drive would be pretty cool for you I think. It gives you a lot of
freedom, you know?”
“Sure.” Seth wasn’t all about that idea.
“I will teach you.” The Samoan seemed to be on a mission now and made Seth lay
next to him so he could get up. “Let’s get dressed. We will drive out of town
for a bit and I’ll show you.”
“Do we have to?” Seth’s voice didn’t sound very pleased.
“Yes.”
The teen rolled his eyes. He’d much rather just stay here and kiss Roman. But
the big man was already going to the bathroom to put on some jeans.
 
                                      ---
 
“P stands for park. You obviously use it when you parked your car.” The older
male instructed Seth. They were an hour outside of the city on a road next to a
forest. No car was out here, no car but Roman’s which Seth was supposed to
drive now. “So this is an automatic car, you know what that means?”
“No.” The teen whined a little. He had no idea about cars.
“It makes driving a lot easier because you don’t have a pedal for coupling.
That means you only have gas and breaks that you have to worry about while
driving. The car basically does everything else by itself.”
“What if it doesn’t?”
“That’s can’t happen.”
“But what if..”
“No, Seth. The car will drive when you hit the gas. Now, please hit the breaks
and then put the gear stick in drive.” Seth looked at Roman with insecure eyes
and the older man put his hand on Seth’s thigh. His smile was encouraging.
“Come on, you can do it. Nothing bad can happen. There is no car out here and
I’m right here with you for help. Now breaks, yeah? Because if you don’t hit
them the car will be rolling by itself.”
Quickly Seth hit them and then put the gear stick into drive. “See that was
easy, right? Now switch your foot to the gas pedal and push it down slowly. Not
all the way, ok?” The teen was super careful and help on to the wheel for dear
life but the car started rolling slowly, very slowly when he put his foot on
the gas. “See! You’re driving!” Roman’s voice was full of joy.
“I’m driving!” Seth’s voice was higher than usual but he didn’t bother because
he was driving a damn car! HE was driving it. He was so overwhelmed by it that
he looked over at Roman with this huge smile and the Samoan looked back before
his eyes widened.
“Look at the road, Seth! Always look at the road!”
He quickly looked back and had to pull the wheel to the left quickly because
while he was looking at Roman to the right he also pulled the wheel a bit to
the right and almost drove off the street into an acre. “Woah!”
The car was back on the road and relief washed over both of them. “I know
you’re into me Seth but please stare at the road the way you stare at me
sometimes, when you’re in the car driving, okay?” Roman laughed a bit.
Seth did too even though his heart was still pounding heavily. “Will do.” He
promised. They practiced a little more until Seth got tired and they decided to
hit back to the city. Back there they went to get some groceries so they could
prepare dinner together at home and then the day was almost over.
 
Because Roman had to train Tuesdays till Thursday Seth and he decided to meet
again on Monday after school. That the older male also had a busy schedule
within the week was okay because Seth had to concentrate on school things too.
With the Samoan putting his lovesickness to ease it became less of a struggle
to focus in school. His homework started to look better again and Seth was
looking forward to the weekends each week because he got to spend them with
Roman, Friday till Sunday. They took two hours to practice the driving each
weekend and went to visit Seth’s parents after that sometimes. Things were
falling back to normal slowly and it felt good. The routine felt good. Letting
himself fall into Roman’s arms felt good. Kissing Roman without having to worry
about what could happen with them tomorrow felt good.
The next two weeks went by quickly. November was over. That also meant that
exams would come soon because Seth had them before Christmas and it also meant
it had been a year since he got the ticket for the FCW show soon. It was
incredible how much had happened in that time. Seth’s life was very different
now.
The teen was sitting in the living room of Roman’s flat and tried to work some
of the school stuff for physics into his head. It wasn’t that he was bad at it
but knowing Roman was next door taking a nap was distracting him. He gave up
eventually and dropped his pen into the book. Carefully, so he wouldn’t make a
noise, Seth stalked over into the bedroom and spooned Roman from behind. The
long dark hair smelled of the sweet shampoo he liked to use and his big body
was warm and soft against Seth’s chest. “Aren’t you supposed to be studying?”
The older male mumbled, still half asleep.
“Can’t concentrate knowing that I could as well smell your hair instead of
understanding why I need to calculate velocity.”
“Smelling my hair won’t make you pass midterms. I promised mom I’d make you
pass.” It was so sweet, since last week Roman had started calling Seth’s mother
mom too. Because the two of them were hanging out so much the older male had
grown to be a part of Seth’s family too.
“I can study tomorrow.” Seth whispered. He didn’t care for his physics book
right now. Roman turned around so he could face Seth. Instead of speaking he
pulled him into a soft kiss. Their mouths fit together perfectly. The teen
dared to poke his hands under Roman’s shirt to feel the warm skin under his
fingertips too and the older male rolled his tongue into his mouth to taste
him. A deep but barely hearable moan left Roman’s throat. Seth tasted so sweet
of cotton candy and strawberries and it made him feel a little bit dizzy but he
refused to let his mind wander and further than kissing Seth. The teen knew. He
understood. It was easier to understand with Roman because he wouldn’t push him
as far as Dean used to.
The room was filled by soft smacking sounds until they both needed air to
breathe and broke apart. “You know..” Seth whispered softly. “It’s my birthday
in May.”
Roman chuckled. “Mine too.”
“Really?” Seth was distracted from what he really wanted to tell Roman. “When?”
“25th”
“Mine is 28th!”
“Sounds like you and I could have a small celebration together.”
Seth agreed and then got back to what he really wanted to say. “And.. I’ll be
turning 18.”
“I know.” Roman kissed Seth’s mouth for another short moment.
“I want to..” He stopped because his face was going red and he didn’t know
where to look. After everything that had happened in the past weeks it felt so
right to be close to Roman and he just wanted to be even closer, wanted to be
connected to Roman like he had been with no one else. In his heart he just
knew, Roman was the right one for it.
“Say it, big boy.” Roman had started running his hand through the dark hair
again. It helped him to relax.
“I want you to be the first one.” Seth whispered and then quickly put his mouth
back on the older male’s because he was too nervous for his answer. But he
couldn’t kiss him forever and he knew that. As much as he tried to drag out the
kiss, the older man pulled back eventually and grinned when their eyes met
again.
“It’s your birthday then. You get to wish for anything you like.” He whispered
back before they met for more kisses.
***** Chapter 15 *****
Chapter Summary
     DEAN IS BACK! Oh happy day, Dean finally makes a return in this
     chapter. But is it the return you were hoping for? Probably not. But
     I make up for it with some more Rolleigns fluff. In this chapter, you
     will see how differently our boys celebrate their Christmas holiday.
     There is some heavy violence and drinking in this chapter so if
     you're triggered by that you want to skip the whole part about Dean!
     Also, I wanted to show you all how I imagine Dean's apartment so
     check out this https://imgur.com/dtoGQFs to see how it looks like.
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Seth tried to hide the box in his bedroom. There was no need to let Roman find
it when he came over in a bit. It was Monday afternoon, just a couple of days
away from Christmas and Roman was about to stop by to help Jennifer build up a
new shelf for the bathroom. Usually, his dad would have done it but with him
being a chef and Christmas approaching the restaurant’s business was booming
and there was no chance in hell he would get a day off until it was next year.
The young male put the box in his wardrobe so Roman wouldn’t see it when he
came in here. He would get to unwrap it on Christmas. Seth was a little bit
nervous because he knew his mom wanted to approach Roman today and ask whether
he wanted to spend Christmas with them. He’d told her about his boyfriend (god
he loved saying this. HIS boyfriend) not going to see his family and it had
truly upset her. “He can’t spend Christmas alone at his home! That’s not going
to happen” she’d said and once Jennifer was on a mission there was no turning
back from it. Not that Seth wanted it anyway.
Just when he had closed the doors of the wardrobe the bell rang. These days
Seth wasn’t scared anymore that his mother would open the door. She got along
so well with Roman so when the teen walked over to the kitchen seconds later he
wasn’t surprised to see the two of them leaning over a pot of freshly made
Tomato soup. “You are definitely staying for dinner, Roman. I accept no No.” He
laughed a little. His laugh was the most beautiful thing Seth had heard today
and probably for the past years too. Everything about Roman was beautiful. What
they shared was beautiful. Even if both shared the feeling that one something
was missing.
“There he is.” Roman had turned around and Seth gave him a wide smile.
“I see you’re once again trying to steal my mom away?” The teen tried to look
mad but since Roman leaned down to kiss his mouth he just couldn’t.
“We both know I already achieved that goal.” Everyone laughed a little bit.
His mother was stirring the soup when she spoke up. “Seth, can you show Roman
the shelf and where I want it? I’ll finish dinner why the two of you build it
up.”
He nodded and guided his boyfriend to the garage through the backdoor of the
hallway. The shelf was still wrapped up when the two of them started to carry
it inside. Seth brought Roman the necessary tools too and then just sat on the
tub edge to see the older male work. “I bought your Christmas present today
after school.” Seth was really proud he’d bought it from his own pocket money
that he’d been saving up.
“Is that so? I take it you won’t tell me what it is?” Roman sounded amused.
“Of course not. It’s a surprise.”
Their conversation went on. Seth tried to steal some kisses while Roman was
building the shelf. Eventually, his mom called him to set up the table for
dinner. Because he was the good kid that his mom had raised him as he did as he
was told and half an hour later the shelf was put up and dinner was served.
“This is really good, Jennifer. I don’t think I’ve had a freshly cooked tomato
soup in.. Not sure if I ever had it.” Roman chuckled and continued eating.
“Thank you. I will make sure to put some of it in a box for you then you can
take it home.”
“That sounds great thank you so much.”
“Of course, sweetheart. That’s the least I can do for you after putting
together that shelf. Steve had been wanting to do it for three weeks now but
you know.. He’s not really a craftsman when it comes to furniture. He’s better
at just buying these things.” Seth was so happy to see Roman and his mom
interact so easily. It seemed to come really natural for the two of them.
“Anyway, Roman, Seth tells me you are spending Christmas alone?”
Alright. Here we go, Seth thought. His palms were getting a little bit sweaty
because he was afraid this step might come too soon. He and Roman were only
dating for about six weeks now. On the other hand, they had grown so incredibly
close in such a short amount of time. It often felt like Roman had been in his
family forever. The teen could sense that the older male liked this. He was a
family person. That’s what made it even sadder that he didn’t talk to his own
family. “That is correct.” He answered to her question.
“I want to invite you to celebrate Christmas with us this year.” That was
typical for her. No beating around the bush, just straightforward saying what
she wanted.
Seth looked at Roman with a shy smile on his face. He wanted his man to be here
on Christmas but he also didn’t want to push him. The Samoan seemed slightly
surprised by the invitation. “For Christmas dinner?” He asked.
“For dinner and you could sleep over and be here for when we hand out the
presents in the morning. I don’t have to say that Seth would love it but Steve
and I would also welcome it if you would be here with us. You’re part of this
family anyway.” She put her hand on his upper arm to underline that she would
enjoy having him here. “I’m making a really good deer for dinner. You should
not miss that.” More convincing from her side even though Seth was almost sure
it wasn’t too necessary.
Roman couldn’t help but laugh out loud at her trying to make him come over like
that. “I will spend Christmas with you guys, I would really enjoy that.” The
older male laughed even more when he saw Seth’s and Jennifer’s eyes light up in
the same way.
 
                                      ---
                                        
It always felt like something was missing when it was time for Christmas dinner
and Steve Rollins’ seat at the table remained empty. However, it wasn’t like
this tonight. The living room smelled of gravy and wine which were served at
the big dining table. In the spot of his father, Roman had gotten comfortable.
Seth’s siblings were on their best behavior (for once in their damn life) and
everyone was dressed up. The white shirt clung so perfectly to Roman’s strong
chest that Seth felt even more little in his white shirt and black vest than he
usually did. His boyfriend even wore a pair of dress pants and a shiny leather
belt. His hair was in a bun at the back of his head and he had shaven his face
clean. Handsome. That was what Seth thought over and over again. His mom too
wore a special outfit. A dress that she had bought for just tonight. Her hair
was put in big locks that charmed her pretty face.
Everyone was leaning back in their chairs with their hands on their bellies
because they’d just finished eating. “The food alone was worth coming over.”
Roman complimented Seth’s mom. “I think I am almost ready to go to sleep now.”
Exactly that happened a couple of hours later. Seth and Roman were laying
together in his bed, wrapped up in each other and lazily making out. “I’m so
happy you’re here today.” Seth whispered when their mouths parted for a moment.
“It means a lot to me.”
Roman leaned in for more kissing. “I know.” He whispered between pecks. “It
means a lot to me too. It’s the first Christmas I’m celebrating in ten years.
Thank you for that, Seth.”
The teen struggled to find good words. Well.. Not really. He knew exactly what
he wanted to say. The three words were burning on his tongue for days but he
felt too shy to just spit them out. There was this feeling in his chest telling
him, it was not the right time yet. It was too early. So instead of saying that
he just whispered, “Don’t thank me. I want you to join us for every Christmas.
And every other holiday too.” For a little bit, he felt quiet and just gave in
when Roman started kissing him again. The big hands were wandering over his
back, making him feel warm and protected. Yet, something was missing. And he
knew Roman felt it too. They both missed the jittery energy, the dirty jokes,
the tickle attacks. Missed the smell of cold cigarette smoke and beer. Both
missed that raspy voice saying their names. Even though they had each other
they missed one person to share their happiness with. But neither of them
mentioned it.
 
“Why do you do this shit so early?” Roman barely had his eyes open when he sat
down on the couch. Seth sat right next to him and wrapped them up in his
blanket from the bed that he had brought here.
“I don’t know. It’s tradition.” He shrugged.
“Shut up over there, will you?” Jeremy was resting in the armchair next to the
window. He was still trying to catch some sleep but Jennifer and Steve had
different plans for them. Like every year they brought hot cocoa for everyone
and sat down with their kids and Roman for the mess.
Under the blanket, Seth and Roman’s fingers interlaced and the younger male
turned his head to look at Roman with his cheeks turning a little red at the
romantic gesture. Secretly holding hands, even though they didn’t have to make
a secret of it, made Seth blush in excitement. The older male looked back and
smiled.
Presents were being unwrapped slowly. Seth was surprised that Roman actually
brought gifts for his parents too. He gave them a very beautiful new tea can.
The teen was impressed because apparently, Roman had remembered that their old
tea can had accidentally been broken a couple of days ago. It was such a nice
gesture of his lover to give a new one to his parents because he, and neither
his parents, had expected him to give them anything. On the other hand, they
had also gotten Roman a gift box with hair products which Seth found hilarious
but Roman prided himself so much on the black mane and he got pretty excited
over the gift too. So it was a good gift.
Seth had gotten a new T-Shirt and some comics so far when he was handed a gift
that apparently was from Roman. He smiled in excitement when he started
unwrapping it and a couple of seconds later he held a new game for the
PlayStation in his hands and a card. Silently he opened it to read it.
Dear Seth, in the past two months you made me happier than I have been for the
last ten years. You and your family mean the world to me and I want to spend
every free minute I have with you. I hereby invite you for a five day trip to
Malibu. We will leave on the 25th of May and come back on the 29th. Merry
Christmas, Roman.
The teen was shocked when he turned to look at Roman. “For real?” He didn’t
raise his voice too much because he wanted to share this moment with only
Roman. While his heart jumped heavily in his chest his boyfriend just replied
by nodding. The teen reached out and wrapped his arms around the neck of his
lover to hold him close. He was overwhelmed by this gift, had not expected to
be getting something this huge. “Thank you. Thank you so much.” He got
especially excited about the gift because this meant the two men were going to
spend their birthdays together, far away from all the people here in Orlando,
away from school and work and having to leave each other on Sunday nights. For
four days it would be just the two of them. They would have all the time in the
world for anything Seth wished for on his birthday. He heard these words in
Roman’s voice in his head. The teen placed some kisses on Roman’s cheek and one
on his mouth until they broke apart. Now he also wanted to give him his gift.
The excitement about the trip was still so present in his body that Seth fest
dizzy when he got up to get the present he’d wrapped up for Roman.
He handed the older male the present that was in the size of a shoe box and
cuddled back at his side under the blanket. His eyes were filled with
expectations when he watched the Samoan unwrap the box.
Inside the older man found a pair of socks first. Happy Socks. A soft laughter
left him. Those were the type of socks Seth loved wearing because they were
painted in all kinds of colors. “Look!” Seth grabbed for them just to turn them
around and to show Roman the fabric that would sit at the bottom of his feet.
One sock read: If you can read this.he other one read: Come here and kiss me.
Seth was really proud that he had found these and looked at Roman with a large
grin on his face.
The Samoan also laughed at that but did exactly what the socks said and leaned
over to peck at Seth’s lips. “Thank you.” He smirked. Then he went on to see
what else was in the box. There was a card wishing him Merry Christmas and then
he got to even more exciting things. He pulled a smaller box out of there and
opened it. Two rolled up wristbands were to be found in it. On the inside of
the lid, it read: Merry Christmas, Roman. From now on there will be no battle
you’ll have to fight alone.
He took one of the wristbands out and rolled it open. One end, the one that
would be visible to everyone, had his ring name on it in white letters. The
other end, the inside that only he would be seeing when he put the bands on
showed two signs stitched there with a red string. It was a heart with an S
right next to it. Carefully he brushed his thumb over it. Seth would now be
with him in every battle he fought inside the ring.
The teen was still looking at him with big eyes. Hopefully, the gift wasn’t too
cheesy for Roman. Softly he asked, “Is it too much?”
“Absolutely not.” Seth wasn’t sure but he thought he almost saw the eyes of the
older male get a little bit shiny. He seemed to be really touched by the gift.
Again he was pulled into a kiss. This one lasted a little bit longer but not
long enough to make it awkward in front of his family.
 
                                      ---
                                        
“Wake up!” Dean growled in annoyance and pushed forward his knee to make it hit
Reby’s leg. The brunette was still asleep even though it started getting dark
outside again. The two of them had spent Christmas Eve in a club not too far
from here and had gotten back when normal people would have lunch usually. “Get
some water.” He growled. His head hurt badly and his mouth felt dry. He kicked
at her again with his knee and finally, she showed some signs of waking up.
“Stop it.” She mumbled and was about to roll out of bed. Oh no. No chance in
hell someone would be speaking like this to him. Especially not a woman.
Regardless of the pain in his body Dean reached out for her brown mop and
grabbed her hair, yanking her body back down on the bed.
“You don’t fucking talk to me like that.” His voice was sharp and angry.
Sometimes this mood was exhausting for him because he couldn’t control it. Rage
would eat up all his brains, making it impossible to think straight and he
could only find a way to get away from these feelings when he was drinking.
“Now go get some water. And a beer.” He was still pulling on her hair. Reby’s
face showed the discomfort but she nodded in agreement and he let her go.
While she went to the kitchen he pulled his pillow up a little so he could sit
slightly and turn on the TV with the remote. Who turned off the damn thing in
the first place? It was always running. “What the fuck 's taking you so long?”
He yelled because impatience was already creeping up in his belly.
Reby came back with quiet steps. She looked horrible. Her make up was all over
her face which wasn’t a surprise considering the way he’d made her sweat when
they’d come home. The bruises all over her body showed that too. Bitemarks were
clearly visible on her pale skin just as some bruises that would turn blue in a
bit. Without a comment, he grabbed the can of beer and the glass of water from
her hands.
The water he drowned quickly before opening the can and slurping from it.
Tasing the beer almost made him feel easier on the spot.
“Hey!” Reby tried to get his attention because his view had been going in
tunnel mood as he stared at the television and sipped his beer like other
people would do with a cup of coffee. “It’s Christmas, Dean.”
“So?” He didn’t look at her while he was speaking.
Her hands were fumbling around with her purse that she’d brought to the bed
now. “I got us a little something. It’s a day of celebration and sharing love
with the people we care about so.” The high voice she was speaking in was
annoying and Dean wanted nothing more than to be drunk again already. His
fingers were feeling cold and his body shaking a little bit. He was so on edge,
could barely keep his shit together before going crazy.
Since the incident with Seth, he’d been drinking more than he did anyway. Even
when he turned up for the shows at FCW he was drunk most of the time. Three
weeks ago the general manager Regal had picked up on it and he’d not been
scheduled for a match since then so he’d stopped showing up on Friday nights at
all. There was no reason to go there anyway. No wrestling, no Dean. Also, he
couldn’t stand one more of Roman’s pitying looks towards his direction. It made
him feel sick to the stomach and poked that demon inside of him just so much
more. “What the fuck are you speaking about?” He growled at her.
“This.” She pulled out a small plastic bag from her wallet now. It was see-
through and Dean spotted the different colored pills inside of it immediately
when he turned his head to look at her. “Let’s have some special fun tonight.”
“Where the damn fuck is this from?” He sat up straight now, tried to force
himself to breathe. God, the anger was so strong today, he was getting so hot
and so cold at the same time, finished his beer in one sip so he could throw
the can through the room and yell again. “Where the fuck does this shit come
from, Reby?”
The girl was in shock about his reaction and quickly put the baggy back in her
wallet and then her purse. “I bought it from this guy in the bar. I wanted to
give you a present and..”
“And what? You thought you can just bring some drugs into my house and I’d
thank you for it?! You stupid, useless piece of shit!” He raised his hand and
landed it down in her face with a hard and loud smack. It wasn’t the first time
he lost control like this with her. His girlfriend pissed him off every other
day. “Do you do this often, hm?” He was still screaming at her. “Tell me!”
There was no turning back from his anger, he couldn’t hold himself.
“Just sometimes..” She whimpered. Reby couldn’t lie to him at all, he knew it
because he knew she got scared of him when he got like this.
“Get out of my fucking bed!” He yelled but gave her no time to react and just
pushed her out of the bed so she would fall to the floor in front of it. The
much taller man was on his feet just seconds later, grabbed for her hair and
yanked her up to her feet. “You’re a fucking addict! I knew it all the time!”
He started mocking her voice. “Babe, can you give me some money? I need new
makeup.Yet you keep running around looking like the biggest whore out there
each day! You spend my money for drugs, don’t you? I can’t fucking believe
this!” Again he raised her and smacked her face before putting his hand on her
throat and forcing her back into the shelf that was right next to the bed. His
fingers closed down tight around her throat as he leaned right into her face,
screaming so loud that spit flew from his mouth. “Next time you need a fucking
shot do what you look like you’re doing. Go out there and sell your ass for the
drugs but don’t you ever dare coming back into my home. I want nothing to do
with that kinda shit. And now get the fuck outta my house!”
Her face was covered in tears and it was all red because she couldn’t breathe.
Reby tried hammering against his chest, begging for oxygen without words but
Dean ignored her needs completely. “If you ever dare to come back here I will
fucking kill you, Reby. I’m not joking. I’ll throw you outta my window without
looking after you!” With these words, he finally let go of her throat but he
pushed her back into the shelf which made her moan and cough in pain as she
sank down to her knees. The girl could barely catch her breath again between
all of this. From the impact that the push had had some stuff fell out of the
shelf but Dean didn’t care. He was still screaming around, ranting as he threw
around some stuff that he could grab from where he was standing. All of it he
threw right at her. “Get your shit and go!”
But she wasn’t quick enough for his taste so instead, he grabbed her by the
hair, grabbed her purse and her bag with her clothes that she’d bought for the
holiday and pulled her towards the door. He didn’t have one bit of care in his
body that she was screaming and begging for him to let her go. She was in pain
obviously but Dean heard none of it. When the door was open he threw her stuff
in the hallway and pushed her out there too. With one last kick to the guts, he
didn’t even need to use a lot of force, he sent her skinny body to the floor
and threw the door shut. Now his apartment was quiet. But he wasn’t, the anger
was still too present, still coating his brains so he couldn’t think straight.
When he came back to the living room he stood in front of the outside of the
shelf again. Dean raised his fists and punched away at the wall of the shelf
until he broke the wooden surface of it. Some trophies he’d won in his time in
wrestling fell off the top shelf but he didn’t care. Angrily mumbling about how
useless and stupid Reby was he went to the kitchen to look for more beer.
“Merry fucking Christmas, Ambrose.” He congratulated himself as he got ready to
drink himself to sleep once again.
Chapter End Notes
     Wow, what the heck was that?! Looks like Dean's life is going
     downhill slowly, right? Well, at least he didn't take up on Reby's
     offer. Are you glad he kicked her out of his life? Or should he just
     have given in? It's not like he has a whole lot to lose. Leave a
     comment and tell me what you think. How will the three of them
     reunite? And more importantly, when?
***** Chapter 16 *****
Chapter Notes
     Okay okay, enough with the fluff and happiness! Valentine's Day is
     over! Happiness for our boys? Not going to happen! Ha! Joking.. But
     this is a necessary step so we can get out boys back on track, right?
     When I wrote this chapter I was listening to Silence by Marshmello
     ft. Khalid which kind of reminded me of Dean in this fic so you might
     want to check it out and then have fun with this chapter!
     PS: I have barely any idea about the American court system so please
     just not that this scene is based solely on how I imagine it to be.
     Sorry if it might not be applicable to how it looks in reality.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
“I don’t know, Roman. I’m worried. I don’t think I should go.” Seth shook his
head. They were laying on the couch in Roman’s flat and watched TV. The older
male would have to leave soon to go to the FCW show, the first one of the new
year. “What if Dean will be there?” For the past two hours that he had been
hanging out here his boyfriend tried to convince him to come with him and watch
the show.
“Babe, Dean’s contract ended with the new year and Regal already informed all
of the roster that he won’t come back.” Roman had told Seth about the way Dean
had been behaving at work and also that he stopped showing up. Regal had gotten
so annoyed with Ambrose that after the third time missing he decided not to
give him a new contract for the upcoming season. “Please, Seth. I just want to
see you in the front row again, cheering for me and enjoying wrestling. I know
you want to come. I promise Dean won’t show up. There is no reason for him to
be there.”
Seth didn’t look convinced at all but then again, it was so hard to tell Roman
no. He could never do it. “Alright..” He agreed. Roman’s eyes lit up
immediately as he leaned down and gave Seth a big kiss.
“Perfect.” Before Seth could say some more the big male rolled off the couch,
suddenly he was full of energy and went out of the room for a moment.
“Ro? Where are you going?” The teen didn’t get an answer, just heard Roman
shuffling around in the bathroom for a little until he came back with a fresh
t-shirt in his hands. Was it really necessary to go change in the middle of
their conversation? Roman came back to the couch and sat down at Seth’s side.
He put the shirt down on Seth’s body. “Brought you this. Should fit you just
right.” From where Roman had put the shirt down on his chest Seth now grabbed
it and unfolded it. Oh, it was Leakee merchandise. And it was new too, the teen
had not seen this shirt before.
“Woah, that’s pretty cool. They gave you a new shirt?” Seth knew this was
exciting for his boyfriend. With Dean gone he would definitely be the new fan
favorite, they both knew it, even though Roman never admitted it. He would
never let such thing get to his head. One night when they’d just been laying in
bed and talked, his boyfriend had told him that even if he kept wrestling mid-
card matches here in Orlando for the rest of his life, he’d still be doing what
he loved and that was gift enough for him.
“Yeah. And you’ll be the first one to wear it tonight.”
“Wait, how did you know I would come with you?”
Roman shrugged. “I just know you can’t say no to my charms.”
“You’re ridiculous.” Seth rolled his eyes and laughed but both knew that the
older male was right.
 
                                      ---
                                        
“Don’t tell your mom!” Roman winked when he handed Seth a beer. Usually he
didn’t get his boyfriend any alcoholic drinks. With Seth being underage and
Dean having his issues, the Samoan generally didn’t drink often and didn’t want
Seth to think it was normal to drink at each possibility either. “It’s just
because you’re finally back here with me and because I have a pretty big
match.”
That was true. FCW had decided they wanted to mix the cards up, wanted to give
the new year a fresh start so they had set up a tournament for the FCW Florida
Heavyweight Championship. Roman would have his first round match tonight and
had decided not to tell Seth the outcome of it before. He wanted his boyfriend
to be surprised by it.
“Roman.. Just tell me what’s going to happen. I’m nervous.” Seth took a small
sip of the bitter liquid.
“Not going to happen. You just sit here and wait. I’m going to get warmed up.”
They shared a quick kiss and then Roman went backstage, Seth remained in his
seat.
 
He was on his legs and screamed on top of his lungs. “Checkmate!” Seth raised
his fists in the air and jumped around on the spot, cheering so loud for Roman,
that his voice stood out in contrast to the others. He leaned over the
barricade slightly and clapped his hands when the referee waited for Roman to
get up and then raise his fist in the air.
“Here is your winner by three count: Leakee!” The ring announcer shouted into
the microphone and Seth was sure the roof of the building would come down any
second because of the heavy reaction that Roman got back from the crowd. Seth
was so incredibly proud of his boyfriend getting one step closer to winning the
big title and when their eyes met the teen saw that Roman too was proud. The
Samoan rolled out of the ring and winked at Seth when he passed him. This man
was unbelievable, he should have just told him that he was advancing in the
tournament. Seth would have prevented getting this close to a heart attack.
Since the show was over now, Roman’s match had been the main event, the people
started to leave. The teen too, got up. Just like when he first came here
outside of the arena, where the merchandise stand was, some wrestlers were
giving autographs and taking pictures with the fans. Seth quickly went to find
Roman there too but left other people the chance to talk to him first. After
all, he’d have the Samoan for himself all weekend.
When he was the only one left Seth threw himself into Roman’s arms and hugged
him so tight, the older male couldn’t breathe for a moment. “You were so great
out there! And you should have told me that you get the win! Why didn’t you
tell me? I almost died because of a heart attack!”
Roman laughed. “Because of exactly that. Wrestling would be no fun for a fan if
you always knew the outcome already.”
“Ugh.” The younger brunette just shook his head and stole a kiss from Roman’s
mouth. “You need to get showered so we can go home. You stink.” Seth referred
to the sweat on Roman’s body. Even though it didn’t smell too much now, he just
wanted to be home soon so they could celebrate with another beer and intimate
kisses.
“Right. Be back in a moment. Don’t go running.”
“Won’t!” Seth giggled after Roman who vanished in the locker room. He probably
could have waited in there but Seth was worried he’d make the other performers
uncomfortable.
A voice from behind caught his attention. “Big win for him, hu?” The teen spun
around to see who was speaking to him. Behind the merchandise stand he found a
new face.
“Uhm, ya.” He smiled softly at the blond girl standing there. His cheeks turned
red a little since he had not realized someone was watching them.
“Will he win the tournament?” She asked. Her positive smile made Seth feel
comfortable on the spot. Yet, he had to shrug as an answer because he didn’t
know. “Well I wish him the best. Cool shirt you got there. I didn’t know he had
new shirts. I wasn’t selling them tonight.”
“That’s because this is the first print of it. I think Roman mentioned they’d
come in for the end of the month or so.”
“Ah, I see. I’m Renee, by the way. I will see you around more often I guess?”
She was still smiling at him.
“Yeah, I think so. Oh, and I’m Seth.” He went over to shake her hand, not to be
impolite. Because there was nothing else to do, Seth started helping her to
clear the merchandise stand. Talking to her was pretty easy and the time went
by quick. They got done with the work and Renee said her goodbyes. Now Seth was
sitting there on the table she’d been working at alone and waited for time to
pass.
He heard some feet down the hall but could hear they weren’t Roman’s so he
didn’t bother looking up from his phone on which he had started playing Snake.
“Well if that isn’t pretty boy Rollins.” Now the teens head snapped up and he
turned to look who it was. Oh! He swallowed hard and slit off the table to
stand, quickly put his phone into his pocket. “Of fucking course, you’d be
hanging out here waiting for your petty boyfriend.” Dean’s words were a slur
when he walked up to Seth.
Even with a meter between the two of them Seth could smell him, could smell the
beer and the cigarettes and the sweat. Greasy hair hung low in Dean’s face and
his eyes were half-lidded. He was totally wasted. Seth got nervous because he’d
never really seen or experienced Dean in this state and from what Roman had
told him, he didn’t really want to either.
“Wha-at are you do.. Doing here?” Seth’s voice was so small and he stumbled
over the words because he was so nervous, could barely think straight. This was
exactly what he had been scared of, that’s why he didn’t want to come! Roman
wasn’t here, in fact no one was here, and Dean had that look on his face.
“I told you, you can’t fucking run from me, Seth.” In reality, Dean had just
come here to pick up some stuff of his and have a last conversation with Regal
but in the state he was, he didn’t think straight anymore. His mind just yelled
at him to take Seth with him, take him back to his house, ruin that beautiful
innocent boy, make him scream and cry for him. “You should come home with me,
Seth. You’re almost 18 now, aren’t you? I will make it worth to finally be
overage.”
“No.” The younger male just shook his head. Dean came closer and Seth tried to
lean backwards but since the table was behind him he didn’t exactly have a
place to go. Not that running would have been an option, the blond would be
right behind him in no time. He was quicker with his long muscular legs.
“Come on, don’t be a bore. Man up. I’ll show you what makes you feel good. You
love me, right? You always love me, Seth.” Dean was close enough now to reach
out and touch Seth’s face. The younger male tried to pull away but Dean didn’t
allow it, grabbed for his chin and buried the tips of his fingers in Seth’s
cheeks as he pulled him a step away from the table. “We’ll have some beer and
enjoy each other’s company like big boys, okay sugar?”
Seth had missed the way Dean called him that so much. He’d dreamed about it,
his heart had ached for it but not like this. Not with the word sounding like
shrr  instead of what it really meant to say. “Let me go!” The smaller man
tried to work up some courage. He felt stronger when Roman was there, hell he
felt stronger by himself too since Roman was there but Dean was so clearly
dominant that he knew he’d stand no chance. “Let go, Dean!” He was talking
louder now, tried to push at Dean’s chest but the blond didn’t do what he asked
for.
“I told you, you won’t get away from me, my little Seth. I will always be in
your life. You love me, I know it.” Dean’s voice was rough as if he’d been
smoking all his life long and it was hard to make out what he said.
It hurt so much. Because yes, he did love, Dean. But not like this. Seth had
struggled with Dean in this mood sober but he couldn’t take it when Dean was
drunk. And he didn’t want to either. Hot tears started building in his eyes
when he looked at the blue eyes that couldn’t really focus on his face. “Stop
it!” Seth was screaming now. He too, couldn’t really see the man in front of
him but not because he was drunk, only because the tears took his sight. “Go
away!” He pushed at Dean again and this time the drunk male had to take a step
backward, almost fell over his own feet. That seemed to cause him getting even
angrier.
“You little fucker, you didn’t just push me, did you?!” He was screaming too
now, spit flew from his mouth as he looked at Seth like he wanted to stab him
right then and there. “You’re nothing but a little stupid bitch! You don’t get
to send me away, you do what I demand. Let’s fucking go!” Dean had now grabbed
for Seth’s wrist and pulled the teen with him towards the exit.
The younger male was screaming  no  over and over again on top of his lungs,
tried to pull away but Dean was too strong, he couldn’t do anything. “No, Dean!
Please leave me alone!” He sobbed, voice high pitched and shaking.
“There is no getting away. Stop fighting this, useless little fuck.” Dean was
crazy. Seth was sure he was completely out of his mind. The wrist of the teen
hurt by now and it only made hims cream more. “Shut your fucking mouth before I
do it for you!” But Seth totally ignored what Dean screamed at him. He was too
caught up in his crying and sobs.
“You scare me, Dean!”
“You should be fucking scared of me, Seth! Not move your little ass outta here,
come on!”
“No! Let me go!” There was still fight in him and Dean seemed to recognize it.
It didn’t sit right with him, he couldn’t stand when someone showed him
resistance. With rage in his eyes Dean raised his hand, was about to bring it
down on Seth’s red face but just when he was about to land his hand on the soft
looking cheeks a huge figure tackled him down to the floor. Because he was
still holding on to Seth all three of them fell, Seth screaming because he
knocked his head on the floor, Dean grunting and trying to push the tall figure
off.
“Get the fuck away from me.” He threw wild punches but didn’t even look at who
and if he hit the other male.
“Dean!” Roman’s voice was so loud and thick and angry when now he was the one
slapping Dean in the face who was laying under the Samoan on the floor. “What
the fuck do you think you’re doing?! It’s Seth!” Again he slapped him. “You’re
so out of your fucking mind! You shouldn’t even be here, your drunk ass
shouldn’t be here!” The oldest of the three had grabbed Dean by the hair and
pulled him back to his legs. In the ring, this scene would have been
interesting. Out here it just made Seth cry out more. When Roman made a fist to
punch Dean in the ribs Seth screamed out loud even more.
“Roman!” The Samoan wanted to hit again but now Seth on his shaky legs was
quicker. “Stop!” He hugged Roman’s strong arm to stop him from punching Dean
again. “Stop it! It’s still him! Stop!” With red eyes, he tried to capture the
attention from the Samoan. He whimpered when Roman’s angry eyes turned to look
at him. This was even worse than Dean being mad at him. Luckily, the second
Roman recognized who was in front of him, his eyes got softer.
“Seth.” Now his voice was full of fear. He totally seemed to forget Dean was
still there and just pushed his drunk ass away. This time the blond did fall
and he groaned in pain as he hugged his own body. Roman’s fist had hit him hard
and possibly broke a rip or two. “Baby, are you okay?” The hair of the Samoan
was still wet and so was his shirt so he probably just got out of the shower
when he’d heard the screaming.
Immediately the younger male shook his head. Nothing was okay. Everything hurt.
“Baby..” Roman quickly wrapped him up in his arms, tried to comfort the teen
somehow. “I’ll fix it. I promised.” He kissed the top of Seth’s head when the
teen cried into his chest.
“Look at you. What a fuck up of a friend you are. Promised to stay away now you
smash his ass every weekend.” That Dean really had the nerve to say that even
though he laid on the floor and couldn’t even get up himself, it was
ridiculous.
“You never know when it’s enough, Dean. You need help.” When Roman was speaking
sirenes of a police car came closer and within seconds three officers stormed
into the entrance of the arena. Finally. Roman had called them the second he’d
heard the screaming and done his best to make sure Dean would stay in place
until they were here. Probably not in the best way but he’d managed.
“We’ve been informed of physical assault.” One of the officers said. Roman did
quick work of explaining what had happened and the officers helped Dean back to
his legs. They put the handcuffs on him for now, just to prevent him from going
crazy again. “Have you been arrested before, Mr. Ambrose?” Dean just growled at
the officers, didn’t manage to say a proper sentence. “We will have to take you
to the station and wait until you are sobered up.” Two of the officers guided
Dean outside to the car while he was screaming still, yelling at Seth and Roman
that they were letting him down and they were the worst people he knew.
One officer stayed with Seth and Roman for a little bit longer. “Do you know if
he has been arrested before?”
Roman sighed before he nod. “Mostly because of him being too loud when he’s too
drunk and once because he got into a bar fight.” Not a huge surprise. Seth
listened and held on to Roman’s arm as if his life depended on it.
The officer wrote down what Roman said. “Well, due to that history I believe
this time he will be seeing a judge and most likely he will be going to jail
for a while. With what you’re telling me it’s probably going to be six weeks.
Maybe three months. Or, if he shows some cooperation, they might ask him to go
to rehab. You’re telling me he’s been having issues because of drinking?”
“Yeah.”
“Then that might be another option. Do you know any of his family that you
could contact for him? He, of course, gets to make a call from the station too
but it might be helpful if you could do that in advance.”
“Dean doesn’t have anyone to call, I think.” At least no one who could bail him
out.
“I see. We will be contacting you in case he will have to go to court. You
might have to tell the judge about what went down. May I please write down your
names and addresses?”
Seth didn’t want to. If he got a letter from court to his parents house they’d
ask about what happened and then he would have to explain and he felt ashamed
of telling them what was going on with Dean. After all, it was still Dean, his
Dean and he didn’t want mom and dad to think badly of him. “Is it.. Maybe
possible..” He sobbed still slightly. “To contact me under Roman’s address
too?”
The officer gave him a questioning look. “Do you live there?”
“Uhm..” Seth couldn’t lie to the officer so he looked down to the floor. All of
this was a mess and now his parents would get mad at him getting in trouble and
he wouldn’t be allowed to stay at Roman’s place anymore and everything was
going downhill. The teen wished he hadn’t come to the show. He should have
stayed home, played the new game until Roman was back. But he didn’t and now he
had to deal with this.
The officer seemed to pick up on Seth’s anxiety. “If it is alright by you, Mr.
Reigns, I will note down that you live together.” He tried to give them a
cheering smile but there was nothing that could fix the situation right now.
Maybe it could never be fixed.
 
                                      ---
                                        
It was only about two weeks later that Seth and Roman sat in the car, both
wearing suits, as they drove in silence to the courthouse they had been ordered
to. It was Thursday and Seth was just happy he would get to stay at Roman’s
place tonight. Because of a teacher’s conference, there would be no school
tomorrow so his mother had allowed him to go and stay with Roman for a day
longer. Lately, even before the thing with Dean happened, Seth was getting
really annoyed by having to ask his mom for everything. He just wanted to be
able to go out whenever he wanted to. After all, he was almost 18. There
shouldn’t be a reason for him to be afraid his parents would go through the
little mail he got. Or for him to ask whether he could go hang out with
someone. Almost being 18 should give him the right to make his own decisions
too.
Luckily he had been able to hide from his parents how he and Roman would be
spending the afternoon. “I wish there was a better reason for us to wear a
suit.” Seth sighed and looked down his own body. He wished that too. As if the
whole world knew what was going on today the weather was a mess too. The sky
was grey, the wind fresh and it would probably start raining soon.
“Seth..” Roman’s voice sounded so serious. “I know it scares you. It scares me
too. But.. Please promise me not to get defensive over Dean, today. He wanted
to hit you. In the face. We need to make sure he gets help. This isn’t okay.
He’s hurting himself too.”
The teen swallowed, still looking down. “I know..”
“You will tell the judge everything that happened, right? Also before.
Everything you told me. Please promise me that.”
Seth struggled. Dean would hurt because of him if he did that. He would be sent
away and be all alone. Without even doing anything right now, Seth started
feeling bad. guilt rose in his chest, making his jaw clench when he tried to
push it back. But he couldn’t. “I don’t want him to hurt anymore. You see what
happened to him because he was always hurting.”
“Seth, Dean can only stop that if he gets help. You’re not adding hurt, you’re
helping him to get rid of it. You have to tell the judge everything.” They’d
had this conversation over and over again on the last weekend.
“I already told you I would, please stop.” Seth felt a little pressured and he
knew Roman didn’t mean bad by that but it didn’t exactly make this situation
easier. It wasn’t too much later that they arrived and went to the room they
were ordered to.
Roman and Seth would not be in the courtroom at the same time. The judge didn’t
want the witnesses to influence each other with what they had to say. Roman
would be going in first. Nervously Seth held on to his hand as long as possible
but then the older male was asked to come inside. “Baby. It’s going to be okay.
Just tell them what you told me.” Roman kissed Seth’s forehead before he left.
Time wouldn’t pass. It seemed to take forever until Seth was asked to come
inside the courtroom. On shaky legs, he entered, walked up to the witness
stand. He had to swear that he would tell the truth only before he was allowed
to sit down. From his spot, he had a good look at Dean. His former lover looked
bad. His skin was even paler than usual. He wasn’t wearing a jail outfit which
meant that at least he didn’t have to stay at the prison until his hearing had
come. That was a small relief. This case probably wasn’t big enough and extreme
enough for that.
The blue eyes pierced right through Seth as he was sitting there. Nothing but
anger in Dean’s eyes. Seth saw Dean’s body but nothing of Dean in his face. It
made his heart hurt badly in his chest. Every beat of it felt like it was being
stabbed and he quickly turned his head away to look at the lawyer for him
instead. Question after question he answered, told everyone in the room about
Dean’s anger towards him, about the mood swings, the night after the show. He
told them every detail they wanted to know. Seth had hoped that would lift some
of the heavy pressure off his chest but with every piece of truth he spit out
it just got worse.
Even though he wasn’t looking at him the teen could hear Dean laugh a quiet but
bitter laugh. He muttered something and Seth immediately ducked his head. The
judge picked up on the small gesture and made a note quickly. Then Seth was
done. He left the room and when the door closed behind him he let out a shaky
breath. Now he could let go the tears he’d been holding in when he was in
there. Now he could breathe. Without moving further or saying anything he just
stood there and felt the hot tears run down his soft cheeks. This was probably
the hardest thing he’d ever done in his life. He was a traitor, had let down
the man he loved. One of the men he loved. Even if it was the worst moment of
them all to realize it but Seth did love both, Dean and Roman. Both in a unique
way but he did love and need them both.
The teen brought up one hand to try drying his face with the back of his hand.
“Seth.” There it was. Warm and caring. The voice of Roman who now wrapped him
up in a tight hug. “It’s okay, big boy. It’s all okay.” Soft lips met his
temple when he hugged Roman’s waist and held on to him just as tight. Even
though he couldn’t see, he could hear in Roman’s voice that he probably lost
some tears too. For quite some time the two just held on to each other until
they went to sit down. They would be called back when the judge would be ready
to read out the decision that was made.
Until then the two brunettes just sat there and held each other’s hand, trying
to find comfort in the presence of the other. Why did everything have to be so
miserable? Whenever Seth felt like he was on top of the world something
happened and he fell down right on his butt. And it was always Roman who had to
put him back together. “I’m sorry.” Seth whispered. Roman frowned.
“What for?”
“If I wouldn’t have come into your guys's life, this wouldn’t have happened.”
The teen leaned his head against Roman’s shoulder now.
“Don’t say that, Seth. And don’t apologize either.” A soft kiss landed on top
of his head. “You coming into my life was the best damn thing that happened to
me in forever.”
Just like it had before Christmas, three little words were burning on Seth’s
tongue. He wanted Roman to know, wanted to tell him but he didn’t dare to just
throw it out there. Especially now, that they were dealing with this. Before he
could say anything else anyway, they were ordered back inside to hear the
decision of the judge. Roman and Seth found a spot in the audience,  they held
on to each other’s hand to provide some more comfort.
“Mr. Ambrose your case concerns being drunk publicly, assault and battery.
After hearing the testimonies I came to the decision to send you to the Orlando
Recovery Center for 30 days. If you do not attend the assigned sessions
scheduled by a psychologist you will have to spend 60 days in the state prison
of Orlando.” He took the hammer to make the decision final. “Case closed.”
Seth swallowed hard when he turned his head to look at Roman and the Samoan
too, looked exhausted. Both tried to tell themselves, this was for the better.
They did this for Dean. This was the last way to help him.
Said man was now guided through the audience to leave the room and be escorted
to the said facility immediately. He had almost left the room, only needed to
pass Roman and Seth now. Seth looked down at his shoes but the Samoan didn’t.
He looked Dean right in the blue eyes, saw the storm inside of them. It assured
him that, even though it broke his heart, they did the right thing.
Dean though, obviously didn’t agree. Regardless of the officer that had cuffed
his wrists he stopped walking and looked at Roman with nothing but pure hate on
his face. “You did this to me. This is your fault.” He spit out, words so
bitter. Roman wanted to say something back but Seth was quicker.
“You did this yourself, Dean. You need help. You..” A soft sob left his mouth
and even though Roman couldn’t see his face from where he was standing behind
him, he knew Seth was crying. He could easily hear him sniffle. “Please, get
better Dean. We miss you. The real you.” Assuring Roman squeezed Seth’s hand.
It was the right thing to say. Even though he probably wouldn’t have been so
nice about it.
“You don’t care about me. You never did. You-” Before he could say anything
else Dean was forced out of the room. Roman and Seth were left with nothing but
a hurting heart as they watched the door close behind him.
Chapter End Notes
     So.. What do you think?
***** Chapter 17 *****
Chapter Notes
     In this chapter, we see how Dean's first moments in the ORC go. He
     meets the doctor that takes care of him and all. Please note, I have
     not myself gone through a process like this, so everything I wrote
     down here is based on some research I did online and on my
     imagination. Hope you enjoy it!
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Dean was glad he at least had a last night in his home before the hearing but
that was over now. Immediately after the judge had presented his final decision
he was pushed outside of the room. For now things were okay, there was still
some alcohol in his blood when he had been sitting there, listened to what Seth
and Roman had told the judges. Beer for breakfast had been the best damn
decision of the day. Reby had been there too but who the fuck could take her
drug addict ass even serious anymore? Even Regal had been invited but he, at
least, could only talk about his behavior at work, that he’d gotten sloppy and
irresponsible and therefore he didn’t get a new contract.
But Seth and Roman, they had really put on a show. Both of them were so
dramatic, Seth almost crying and shaking like a fucking little baby and the big
dude looking at him with these petty eyes. God, there was so much anger in
Dean’s head, his brain pulsed against his head from the inside. He wanted to
scream and jump over the table he was seated at, wrap his hands around Roman’s
throat and just squeeze until he would stop talking. He wanted everyone to stop
talking about him for just one fucking time.
There was nothing wrong with Dean. A drink here and there didn’t hurt. It hurt
no one. And when he was drinking at least he wasn’t hurting either. But
apparently everyone wanted him to hurt so they deserved it too. Especially the
young boy and the big guy. Traitors. Neither of them had ever loved him or
cared about him, otherwise they would have accepted him the way he was. Yet, he
was sitting here in the back of this van that brought him straight to the
Recovery Center. Fucking Recovery Center, he had nothing to recover from. He
felt just fine, healthy as ever.
The van came to a stop. As of now, the blond felt like they treated him like a
prisoner already. Yeah, these people all believed he’d be going to jail in no
time anyway. “Watcha looking at?” He mouthed at the officer that opened the
door of the van and stared right at him.
“Ambrose, exit the car.” His voice was hard like the look on his face.
On slightly wobbly legs Dean did as he was told. There wasn’t a huge chance for
him to get away now. Three officers were there, his hands were still tied
behind his back. Fuck. The doors of the van closed and through his slightly
blurry vision Dean’s eyes pinned the large building in front of him. It looked
nice, a little bit like a hotel. But that wasn’t what it was and that was what
made Dean want to stay out here.
Still handcuffed, the blond man was escorted inside the building. He tried to
slow down his steps, wanted to be out here for as long as possible because he
knew, the second he got in there, freedom would be a unfamiliar concept. But
the officer left him with no choice. He was forced to enter the front door,
dragged forward to the front desk.
“Good afternoon, we bring in Ambrose.” The officer put Dean’s file on the front
desk. Behind it a pretty young man was seated. With the dark hair that was
pulled into a bun and the glasses on his face he reminded him of Seth a little
bit. Seth, the stupid little bitch, it was all his fault that Dean was here
now. Without really acknowledging Dean the man took his file and looked at the
front page of it. It was only then that he turned his head to look at the blond
for a moment. His eyes were critical and almost judging.
“What?” Dean snapped, breath so heavy that it almost hurt his longs. He was
ready to go, hands tied to his back or not, he would knock that bitch out if he
wanted to.
“Welcome to the facility, Mr. Ambrose.” His voice was so fucking nice, way too
nice considering the look on his face. It didn’t matter that Dean’s vision was
too blurry to make it out directly but he just felt like the eyes of the
brunette were judging him. “Officer, I believe he is drunk. Would you mind
guiding him to the sobering-up room? I will lead the way.”
“I’m not fucking drunk!” Dean’s voice was way louder than it needed to be but
he didn’t care. He just wanted to go home, lay in his bed and watch TV. He
wanted to be left alone but his wishes remained unheard. “Let me go!” He
demanded but no one reacted to it. Before he could do anything about it the
door to a room was opened. There wasn’t much in there. A sink, a toilet, a bed.
Seemed like this was prison after all. The officer pushed him inside and turned
him to look at the younger male from the front desk.
“You will stay in this room until you are sober, Mr. Ambrose. You might want to
sleep a little. Later today a doctor will have a closer look at you and a
psychologist will create an analysis of your state as well. The more you
cooperate with us, the quicker you will recover.” Now he was freed from the
handcuffs but being in this room made him feel even more imprisoned as that.
Seconds later he was alone. It was quiet but the storm in his head was loud.
There was no television in here, no radio, nothing that could distract him from
this, from being alone with himself. The tall male sat on the bed and started
down at his shoes for a moment, just stared at the way the black shoes stood
out against the blueish floor. He tried to breathe properly, tried to keep down
the rage creeping up more and more and then he snapped.
Dean jumped up and started pacing back and forth, mumbling words he couldn’t
understand himself. Then he stopped, right in front of the wall, formed a fist
and smashed it against the cold stone there. He did it again and again before
his muscles were too exhausted to keep going and his knuckles were swollen and
bloody. Dean could feel how hot his face was and he ran the sleeve of his
sweater over his face to get rid of the wetness there. No. No one could break
him. No one had for 25 years and no one would now.
When the blond male sat down on the bed he was shaking slightly. Slowly he was
sobering up. It made his whole nervous system anxious. Inside his head it was
still so loud and his body felt so hot that he couldn’t even differentiate
anymore whether the wet on his face had been some tears or whether it was sweat
which he definitely felt on all of his skin. “Fuck.” Even though he was sweaty
and hot on the outside, his body felt cold so despite his disgust for the bed
he was sitting on, Dean wrapped the blanket around his body. He laid down and
curled up, covered by the blanket. No one would break him. He wasn’t sick. He
didn’t need recovery. He would show them all that he was okay. Over and over
again the voice in his head screamed it at him, so loud that he wanted to
scream in reality but he knew, if he opened his mouth now, only a sob would
escape from his exhausted body. Dean closed his eyes, exhausted from the battle
he fought with himself and fell asleep.
 
When the blond opened his eyes for the next time he felt uncomfortable even
more than before. His clothes were wet from the sweat and clinged to his body.
In his head it was quiet now but it still hurt and felt heavy - oh so heavy.
And his stomach was killing him. It felt uneasy, made weird noises and every
now and then a sharp pain went through it. He knew this feeling. It was the
reason for him to never sober up completely. But that was normal right? One
does what makes him feel better and with a couple of beers Dean felt happy and
healthy as ever.
Beer.. Fuck. His head started calling for it. Beer. Whiskey. Rum. Fuck, he’d
even drown some of these fuzzy girl drinks now if he would be offered one.
Everything just to stop feeling like this. Just to take off the edge.
A nauseated feeling crept around Dean’s belly area, hell he never got this. He
never felt sick from drink but now, he knew he couldn’t stop it. The noises
from his belly warned him and with the little strength that he felt right now
Dean rolled out of the bed over to where the toilet was. He made it just in
time before his stomach started cramping and liquid shot up his oesophagus.
Since he had not eaten anything this morning all that left his mouth was a
bitter fluid. More cramps his but barely anything got out of him. How should
it? The last time he’d eaten was.. Dean didn’t remember. It didn’t matter
either.
Once his stomach decided to calm down he flushed the toilet and washed his
mouth. Regardless of his damp clothes making him feel uncomfortable he made it
back to bed and hid back under the covers.
 
When Dean woke up the next time he felt no better, if any he felt worse. His
stomach was still cramping but there was obviously nothing in there to throw up
anymore. What had changed was what was going on in his head. He was clearer now
in his vision but that also allowed for the pain to shoot through. It wasn’t
just a physical pain now, headache and cramps.
The blond felt his heart beating too quick, it was raising inside of his chest
and no matter how many times he took a deep breath to force relaxation, it
hammered away without mercy on his tired system. It felt heavy even though it
was running a marathon, hurt inside of his chest and made him squeeze his eyes
shut. What a fucking nightmare. If this was what being sober felt like he
didn’t want it. He’d rather die of drinking too much than feeling this.
A knock on the door made him open his eyes again. Most of his body was covered
under the sheets so he didn’t even infold his body from the rolled up position.
The blond expected a lock to turn but the door opened almost by itself and a
man in his fifties or so entered the room. He wore a dark blue polo shirt. On
the left side of his chest it said Orlando Recovery Center in yellow letters.
Under that, in smaller letters, it read Doctor Angle. “Ah, you’re awake.”
Dean was a little confused. What the fuck? There was no lock? He couldn’t
believe that. “The fucking door was open all the fucking time?” He snapped with
his rough voice. It was easy to hear that he’d been throwing up and his throat
must feel sore from it.
The doctor turned around for a moment to look at the door as if he had not
noticed himself. “Of course it was open.” He turned back to look at Dean. “This
isn’t a prison, Mr. Ambrose. People here can walk around freely. We are here to
help you, not to punish you. In fact, only the front door, bathrooms and locker
rooms in this place have locks. All other doors must remain open at all times.”
What the fuck, he repeated in his head again and again. This didn’t make sense.
Dean tried to sit up but he felt too weak to do so. Because of that he moved
back a little so the wall behind the bed could support him.
“What if I’d been taking a piss and you just walked in on me? What the fuck,
dude?” Dean frowned at the thought of it alone. The doctor seemed slightly
amused of what he had said and that pissed Dean right off again. “What the fuck
are you smiling about?” His tone was aggressive and if he wouldn’t have been so
weak the blond would have slapped the smile right out of the doctor’s face.
“Take it easy, Mr. Ambrose. I’m just here to check on your physical condition.
I’m here to help. My name is Doctor Angle. However, I would like you to call me
Kurt. In our facility everyone goes by their first name. Because of that I
would like to ask you whether you agree with me to call you Dean?” The older
man had checked the name on the file in his hands. He didn’t give away that by
this small gesture it was easier to gain access to the patients. It made them
seem more like they were in a friendly place.
“Well, Doctor Kurt, I’m fine so you can fuck right off.” Dean growled and
looked at the man with the frown on his face still.
“Kurt alone is enough, Dean.” He looked the blond thoroughly. “That hand over
there doesn’t look like it’s okay.” The doctor gestured towards Dean’s broken
skin on his knuckles.
“It’s nothing.” He looked away. Dean didn’t want to deal with the doctor. In
fact, he didn’t want to deal with any of this. He just wanted to go home and
lay in his own bed and have a beer and order some pizza which he wouldn’t eat
in the anyway. He wanted to pass out to a stupid quiz show and wake up when it
was dark outside again.
By now the doctor has sat down at the bottom end of the bed and kept looking at
Dean. “If it’s nothing it wouldn’t bother you to show me, right?” The blond
almost hissed at him, the conflict written all over his face. He wanted to
proof that it didn’t hurt at all but when the doctor would see it he would know
Dean must be in pain. For a couple of seconds blue eyes stared angrily into
other blue eyes that were much softer and filled with concern and care. Fake.
All of this look must be fake.
“No.” Dean put his hand under the covers so the doctor would stop staring. But
the older male wouldn’t let him go so easily.
“Dean, what do you think you will be doing in your time here? What is your
goal?”
“I don’t have a fucking goal, I don’t want to be here and I don’t need to be
here. I don’t have a fucking problem and I just want to go home.” He looked
away again.
The doctor looked at him though, looked at him until he opened Dean’s file and
started reading from it. “Patient Ambrose has been convicted with assault,
battery and being drunk publicly on more than one occasions. Three victims of
his violence uttered harmful physical contact especially when Ambrose was
drunk. Furthermore, they described him as moody and out of control when being
drunk. Apparently he does not know his limits. Next, William Regal, former boss
of Mr. Ambrose, stated he is unreliable, irresponsible and shows little signs
of respect. He appeared at his work space intoxicated several times. In
addition to that he has been involved in two bar fights, both too caused by
losing control due to drinking too much.
We come to the conclusion that Mr. Ambrose does have an alcohol addiction. He
will be sent to the ORC to go through the withdrawal and recover. It is the aim
to resocialize him and integrate him back into society once the withdrawal
passed by.” Now the doctor looked back at Dean. “So these things are not true?”
“I don’t remember doing half of these things.” Dean moaned back. His heavy head
throbbed in pain. The conversation with the doctor was annoying and he felt
weak and just wanted to sleep more, wanted to sleep and never wake up.
Angle made a note in his file about what Dean had said. “Why are you writing
that down?” Dean asked curiously.
“Because, even if you will deny it, not remembering these things is another
proof for that you have been drunk during these occasions.” The doctor got up
now. “I will need to check whether you are sobered up now, Dean. Please follow
my instructions without resistance so I will not have to call any further
personnel to hold you down while I check on you.” Dean looked at the doctor
with as much hate as he had in his body right now but the older man didn’t seem
impressed.
Instead he came closer. With a small like he checked on Dean’s eyes, seemed
pleased by it and moved on ro check on some other things, making notes about
them. “Later a nurse will come to take a blood sample from you. I ask you
kindly to cooperate with that smoothly too.”
“Why would you need a fucking blood test?” Dean growled.
“Because we need to check whether your liver suffered permanent damage.”
“I’m fucking fine.”
“Really?” The doctor wasn’t annoyed and kept a straight face. “Let me just make
you aware of a couple of symptoms you’re showing right now, Dean. You’re
sweating but wrapped up in the blanket which tells me you probably have a
fever. Your hands are shaky that’s why you hide them from me. Well and because
you tried to bash in the wall with your fist which just underlines the raging
aggression that the testimonies spoke of. You have been throwing up, the smell
in the room gives that away and I take it you still feel sick. Because you
haven’t asked for a cup you probably barely drank any water in the past hours
meaning you’re most likely dehydrated. So I take it the wall has to help you
keep up your head because either it is in too much pain to hold it up yourself,
or your body is simply too weak after spending all of its energy on emptying
your stomach. Lastly, you’re swinging back and forth between curiosity and
being defensive. Your eyes tell me a whole lot more so I take it anxiety is
starting. As a wild guess now, your heart is probably running so quick inside
your chest that this is the reason for your heavy breathing. But the breathing
won’t calm it down. Am I right, Dean?”
The blond looked at Angle pissed. Was he really that easy to read? “Hmpf, you
know nothing.”
The doctor took a deep breath. “Dean. You’re here for a good reason. I know you
cannot see it yet. I know the withdrawal is making you feel anxious and sick.
These things are normal. But you will get better. Now come on. Let’s go.”
“Go?” Dean now turned his head to look at the doctor in surprise. He still
wasn’t buying into this whole thing. “Where?”
Confusion was thick in his voice when he looked at the doctor who’d gotten up
already. “To your room of course. Did you think we’d let you stay in here the
whole time?” To be quite honest Dean had not thought about it at all. When he
shoved his heavy feeling body off the bed he grabbed for the sink with one hand
because he felt dizzy. “Let me help.” Angel reached out but Dean immediately
shoved his hand away.
“Don’t fucking touch me.” He growled and let go of the sink. “I can walk
myself. I’m fucking fine.” Angel looked at him, not trusting what he said but
he then lead Dean out of the room. It was bright outside. Fuck, how long had he
been asleep? He’d gotten here around five, it shouldn’t be this bright outside.
The doctor seemed to pick up on Dean’s confusion. “You slept for about 15
hours, Dean. It’s Friday morning, about half past nine.”
This surprised Dean. 15 hours? That was pretty long. Being caught up in the
thought he barely noticed anything they passed as they walked to an elevator,
rode up two levels and got out there. Dean and the doctor passed some doors
until they had reached the last door on the hallway. Without a comment the
doctor opened the door. Right, no locks.
Together they stepped inside and Dean looked around. There were two windows,
because his room was on the outside corner of the building. The light falling
in was dimmed by curtains. Luckily, because more light would have made his head
hurt even more. Furniture in this room was limited. A bed, a desk with a chair,
a shelf above it and a wardrobe. Another door lead to what he guessed would be
the bathroom.
“There is clothing in the wardrobe, we provide this for all of our patients.”
The doctor checked his watch again. “The nurse will come to check on you and to
take the blood in about an hour. You have an appointment with your psychologist
at four. Lunch takes place between twelve and three. You’re not allowed to take
food to your room. This is all for now. Take your time, take a shower and sleep
some more. Get settled.”
The doctor was about to leave the room when he stopped for another moment. “I
know you have no family on the outside but I would like you to write down any
personal belongings that you need with you. And please write a contact person
down which we can call to bring these things here. I will see you later, Dean.”
And then he was alone again.
The room was ridiculous. All walls were in a light yellow, his bed sheets in a
comforting gree just like the curtains. It felt more like a hospital than it
probably should. Even though Dean was tired and exhausted he first went to take
a shower and then put on some of the provided clothes. He went for the
sweatpants, dark blue, and a white t-shirt. His head told him to sleep but he
wanted to make a list first. If he would be stuck in here, he might at least
get some of his stuff.
Dean sat at the desk and took the notebook that rested on there. He opened the
first page. Okay.. What did he need? On top of everything, beer. So Dean wrote
down beer. Anything you need, the doctor had said. Any of your personal things.
He continued his list:
    * my pillow
    * Forest Gump book
    * gym shoes
    * bathroom utilities (everything that’s there)
That was it. What else would he need? He didn’t plan on staying longer than
necessary. Now who should he write down to get these things? There was no one
out there that cared whether he had these things or not. Or.. No they didn’t
care of him. They put him in here. Roman and Seth didn’t give a shit about him.
With anger rising up in his chest again Dean closed the notebook. He’d think
about it later. For now he wanted to lay down.
Chapter End Notes
     Oh that looks like a rough start for Dean. Do you think he will come
     around? Let me know how you see this going. And what do you think is
     going on with Roman and Seth in the meantime? Leave a comment! I'm
     curious about your ideas.
***** Chapter 18 *****
Chapter Notes
     Dean is going to therapy and Roman and Seth are busy picking up the
     past of the blond man. This chapter is a bit more positive, everyone
     is finally making some progress. Let's see how this goes.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
His arms were crossed in front of his chest and Dean pulled an annoyed face.
Why again was he forced to sit here and listen to the stories of others? Group
therapy had first sounded nice, maybe there was someone cute that Dean could
smash secretly in the backyard of this place. It was only his second day in the
recovery facility and he was already bored. Yesterday he had slept a lot
because his body was still exhausted from being sick. The only time he had sat
up in the bed was when the psychologist had entered the room.
Regardless of the prejudice Dean had towards the shrink before he even met him,
Adam Copeland was pretty cool. He had long blond hair put in a bun and his eyes
told a story that the lunatic wanted to find out. But Copeland had done nothing
but asked him questions and made notes about what he answered. The talk wasn’t
really therapeutic but then again, it was just an examination of how Dean was
doing.
Now, that he actually started his first therapy session the blond had expected
some more though. It was incredibly boring. They were a new group of people and
it was sort of an introduction in which everyone should say their name and why
they were here. Most of the dudes sitting there struggled with drug addiction
and depression and looked like death on two legs. Luckily Dean had kept his
good looks, ha!
He had just considered to close his eyes and relax for a while when a young man
with dark hair spoke up. The male had a thick Irish accent that made Dean feel
funny. This accent was something that Dean hated to listen to so it kind of
pissed him off even though the other male didn’t do anything to him. It just
made him feel annoyed and he wanted to walk over and put his hand over the
mouth of the other male. Irish wasn’t pretty. Sounded like someone who’d been
stuck in the middle ages or so.
“Hey, I’m Finn.” The man introduced himself. He was probably a bit older than
Dean, in his 30ies or so. “I am guest-” Haha, guest. Sure. “-at the ORC because
I suffer from a dissociative identity disorder. Uhm..” His fingers fumbled with
the hem of his shirt. Talking about his problem seemed to make him nervous.
“Sometimes my mind will.. I don’t know, turn off? I have no control of that and
when I wake back up I don’t know what happened in that time but I found out
that Prince Devitt takes over during those times. And.. That he isn’t very nice
to people. I am here to learn how to control the blackouts better and maybe how
I can be the dominant one in my head again. Uh.. That’s it.” He smiled to the
other people.
Interesting. This dude seemed to have issues that weren’t as plain and boring
as the other people here. Dean picked up on it. He wanted to meet that Prince
Devitt. Maybe he’d be more fun to be around.
The therapist that guided them through the session thanked him for telling his
part and then he turned towards Dean. “You are next on my list, Dean. Tell us
why you’re here.”
“You can wipe that smile right off ya face.” He growled at the bearded male.
“I’m Dean and I have no business here but I don’t wanna go to jail so I gotta.”
His arms were still crossed in front of his chest as he looked the therapist in
the face with resistance in his eyes. There was no reason for him to be here.
“We are all here for a reason.” The dude with the two personalities spoke up.
Hm, seemed like he had some balls.
“Dean, we want to hear your story. Everyone opened up, why don’t you try it
too?” The voice of the therapist was so calm it pissed Dean off even more.
“No. Why don’t you fuck off. All of you.” He looked back and forth between Finn
and the therapist. “I don’t need your fucking help.” Now he pointed at the
therapist. “And I don’t need your fucking pity.” Then he pointed at the dark
haired male. He got up from his chair. “In fact, I don’t need any of this
because I don’t have a fucking problem.” And with that he stormed out of the
room. Anger was thick in his brain, rage making his chest feel tight, so Dean
stormed outside. Out of the building to the backyard of the building. It was
pretty warm outside already. 10 o’clock in the morning but Dean could walk
around in the blue polo shirt out here just fine without getting cold. From the
pocket of his sweatpants he grabbed a cigarette.
Fucking recovery center, only allowed five cigarettes per day. Fuck them. He
could decide himself when he wanted to smoke and how much. He lit one of the
cigarettes up and took a deep drag, filling his lungs with the burning smoke.
 
                                      ---
                                        
Seth had dozed off half an hour ago. Roman went to the gym after breakfast and
he just stayed in. First he had done some homework but that was finished
quickly. The television was running and the teen had fallen asleep slowly. That
was until he heard the key in the lock. Roman was back! Quickly he rubbed his
eyes to make himself wake up quicker. “Babe, I’m back!” The Samoan shouted from
where he was taking off his shoes.
When he entered the room Seth admired the view he got. Wet hair was put in a
tight bun and the grey sweatpants made Roman’s body look so much more
delicious. A tight shirt clung to his broad chest that Seth loved to rest his
head on. The tall Samoan was so sexy and some wild thoughts started running
through Seth’s head. They made him blush immediately and he tried to push them
away. Three more months. Then they would go to Malibu.
“Hey.” The teen smiled happily and Roman came to the couch, stole a kiss from
his mouth. “Brought us some food. Your mom called and insisted on me picking up
some of the potatoes and chicken she made. There’s also veggies and sauce. We
can eat in a minute.” From where he had placed his bag next to his feet now,
Roman grabbed the mail he had put on top of it.
There were three letters and some advertisement flyer which he tossed on the
table quickly before one of the letters seemed to grab his attention. Roman
opened it quickly and read through it. Seth didn’t ask what it was, he was in
no position to do so. It was still Roman’s private mail. Yet, the teen studied
Roman’s face for the reaction the letter would cause. Once he was done reading
he took a deep breath and shook his head. “Is everything okay?” Seth asked
softly.
Rome grabbed for his hand and placed a kiss to his knuckles. “It’s fine. It’s a
letter from the ORC. They’re asking me to bring in some of Dean’s things since
I’m the only one who has a key for his flat.”
“Oh.” Seth was surprised. The mail delivery must have been quick since Dean
only went to the facility two days ago. “Will you do it?”
The two of them looked at each other now. Clear conflict was written over both
of their faces and Roman shrugged. “There’s no one else who can do it, right?”
Still they were holding on to each other’s hand and now Seth sat up, took
Roman’s hand in his lap. A little nervous he started playing with his fingers.
“Do you.. Do you think we did the right thing? He’s all alone in there. He’s
all alone out here too. He has so much hate for us yet, you’re the one person
he contacts to get his personal belongings.” Seth looked down at where his
hands were busy.
Roman took his time to reply to the younger male. “I think this is a good sign,
Seth. He must be sober now and he knows that I care about him. He knows that I
will do it.” For a moment he paused and just studied Seth. “Do you still have
doubts, big boy?”
Seth swallowed hard and shrugged. “I feel bad for this. All of this happens
against his will and he is all by himself. And..” He struggled to say it,
didn’t want to disappoint Roman but he also didn’t want to lie. “And I miss
him.” His voice was only a whisper now.
When the Samoan took away his hand the teen whimpered for a moment but then
strong and warm arms hugged his figure and pulled him into a hug. Roman kissed
the top of his head. “I miss him too.” Then he nuzzled into the dark hair.
“That’s why he needs help. So he can come back better and healthier.” Seth knew
that his lover was right. But it hurt to admit it. Seth was hurting for Dean.
“If you want to, you can come with me when I get his things. I will do it after
we ate I think.”
Without using words Seth nodded and cuddled into Roman’s hug for a little
longer, needing the comfort his man was providing.
 
The children were loud where they were playing. They had dragged out the water
hose from one of the building's basement and were splashing each other in the
warm sun. Seth almost asked Roman if he could just go and play with them
instead of entering Dean’s apartment but he needed to be brave now. For Roman
and also for himself. Together they walked up the stairs. It smelled weird in
here today, made Seth’s belly feel heavy but maybe that was because of the last
memory he’d from being here.
Roman opened the door to the flat and they entered. The air made Seth choke on
his own breath for a moment because it smelled like old beer, cold cigarettes
and sweat. Dean probably hadn’t opened a window for weeks in here. Quickly, the
Samoan went for it and pushed open both windows of the living room. The place
was a mess. Empty beer cans everywhere, old food on the table, two full
ashtrays too. The bed wasn’t made, stuff was spread all over the floor, even
worse than when Dean had still actually been living in here. The shelf was
broken on one side and some trophies had fallen down on the floor and couch.
Seth pressed his lips tight together and shook his head. “No way we will find
all his stuff in here..” He looked at Roman.
“Let’s clean this mess up a little bit. We will find everything we need.” And
with that, the Samoan went to the small kitchen to grab some garbage bags and
get to work. This was something Seth admired in his boyfriend. He didn’t think
much. If there was work to do, he’d just do it and he wouldn’t stop until he
was done.
Together they filled the bags with the trash. Seth got a bucket with hot water
and a sponge to clean some surfaces from dust and spilled beer. He even
stripped Dean’s bed and threw some laundry in the washing machine. What a
surprise that the blond even owned one.
Once the place was looking slightly better Roman had found a gym bag of Dean’s
and started tossing some stuff in there. First, he got the things from the
bathroom, then the book. He added two other books too. Probably Dean would read
one book in a day or so, to keep his head busy. The Samoan added shoes and
grabbed the pillow too. That was everything.
“I think we got it.” Roman turned to look at Seth who was going through some
stuff on the shelf.
“I think there is some stuff here we should add.” The teen walked over to Roman
and handed him an envelope.
“What’s that? Money?” He took the envelope and opened it. It was old and he was
a bit afraid to rip it when he pulled out the papers from in there. Some were
pictures, two were letters. Roman went through everything. The first picture
showed Dean on his first day of school. He looked so excited, had a big
backpack on and his hair was combed. The memory made the Samoan smile. It was
the next picture that surprised him. A much younger Roman Reigns and Dean
Ambrose were ginning into the camera. They leaned against a blue VW Golf, Roman
held the keys for it in one hand and rested his other one on Dean’s shoulder.
The blond had a smoke in his fingers and the other hand pushed in his jeans
pocket.
“That was my first car.” Again he smiled at the memory. “Dean and I went to
pick it up and he asked me why I bought such a shitty thing. But it carried us
to wherever we wanted to be for years.” Roman went to look at the next one.
Dean and he in the ring. And then again the next one. It was a rather new
picture and a beautiful one too.
Seth and Dean were laying on the couch, the teen's dark hair spread over the
pillow under his head. The older male had wrapped his arm tight around the teen
and showed off his dimples as he looked into the camera with his blue eyes.
From where Seth was standing next to Roman he looked at the picture too. “That
was when he first invited me here.” There was no bigger story to it, Seth
didn’t have as much history with Dean as Roman did. “I think the stuff could
help him, you know.”
Roman agreed and put the pictures back in. Then he took a closer look at the
letters. Both of them were of Dean’s mom. Reading just the first paragraph made
him feel sick.
My sweet Dean, I hear you are doing alright for yourself. Joey saw you in the
gym the other day and he told me he tried to talk to you but you sent him to
hell. I don’t understand why. We love and miss you in our home. I also hear
that you started a career. Does it pay you enough? You should come home. We
could all support each other.
The Samoan didn’t continue reading. The words of Dean’s mother made the anger
in his chest rise. “We’re not adding the letters. They’re terrible.”
Seth hesitated because he didn’t like to stand against Roman’s word. “I think
we should. They could remind Dean of how he never wants to be.” The Samoan
hesitated but Seth’s words made sense so he did add them.
 
                                      ---
                                        
Dean was still outside. He had tried to go back inside but it only made his
head hurt worse. A drink could fix this. Just a tiny shot would make the hurt
go away. It was still early in the day and he didn’t have any smokes left
anymore, so he couldn’t even take off the edge.
“Didn’t you say you don’t want to go to jail?” Copeland approached Dean. He sat
next to him on the bench that Dean was resting on.
“Fuck off.” Was all he growled back.
“Nah.” The therapist shook his head. “We need to talk.” Both just sat there and
stared into the distance where some people were playing tennis.” “Why did you
storm out of group therapy?” First Dean didn’t answer anything. Why should he?
It had been the right thing to do. But Copeland didn’t let go. “Do you truly
believe the life you are living is healthy?”
For a moment Dean let the words sink in. Being sober sucked. When he was drunk
he didn’t have to think about all of these things, didn’t have to deal with
himself. The blond leaned forward, rested his elbows on his knees and laid his
hands on his face. As an answer, he just shrugged.
Adam decided on another approach. “You know, I was a patient here once too.”
And that seemed to work. It caught Dean’s attention. He sat up again and raised
one eyebrow at the therapist. “I was similar to you. I was always out there,
one party after another, drinking, sometimes drugs. Had a beautiful girlfriend
too. But on the other hand, I had no job. I lived off my girlfriend in her
apartment. I almost even cost her the job she was doing and then she kicked me
out. And I got so frustrated that I went to party even more and then one day, I
had no money, I decided to rob a small store a little outside of town. I just
needed the money to support my habits. That day I got caught.
Similar to you, I didn’t understand why I had to come here. I refused help and
was alone in my room most of the times. But at one point it struck me. I didn’t
want to be alone. I didn’t want to feel like shit and I could be better. And
even if it felt stupid to open up to a shrink and to the crazy people running
around here, once I started, it helped me.”
“Good for you.” Dean crossed his arms in front of his chest.
“Do you feel healthy?”
No answer.
“I hear you got pretty angry today. Are you still angry?”
“Yep.”
“I want you to try something. Come on. Stand up.” Copeland was on his legs now
and waited for Dean to follow. Both men now stood there in the sun. “Where do
you feel your anger. Physically I mean.” Dean looked at the doctor and
shrugged. “Come on, dude.” Ok, not pretty formal but maybe it would gain some
more of Dean’s trust. “When I get angry, I feel it in my belly. It feels like I
drank acid and it’s bubbling in there. Where do you feel your anger? Take a
moment and listen to yourself. Where is your anger located?”
Alright, Dean decided to just track along. Maybe the doctor would leave him
alone then. He took a deep breath and listened to his body. “Mainly in my
chest. And in my head. My brains just scream at each other and I can’t think
straight anymore I just.. I snap. There is nothing rational about it. I just
need to get it out.”
“And how do you get it out usually?”
“I punch my way through it.” Dean shrugged.
“Okay. We will try something different now. Put your hands on your chest where
you feel the anger. Yeah, just put them on there.” Adam waited for Dean to
follow. “Instead of hitting someone in the face now I want you to inhale deeply
ten times. And when you breathe out formulate one sentence to why you are
angry. They don’t have to be all different. It can be only one thing if it’s
only one thing that angers you. I will breathe with you.”
The doctor too put his hands on his chest and together they started breathing.
Inhale.
“I am angry because I can’t drink.” Exhale.
Inhale.
“It pisses me off that people say I have an issue because that’s my shit to
deal with and I don’t see it as an issue.” Exhale.
Inhale.
“I am fucking annoyed because I have to do therapy.” Exhale.
Inhale.
“I am angry at Roman and Seth for putting me in here.” Exhale.
Inhale.
“I am angry at that mouthy kid from group therapy.” Exhale.
Inhale. This time Dean inhaled more deeply. He took his time.
“I am angry that I am starting to be like my mom.” Exhale.
Inhale.
“I am angry that I lost my fucking job, because I love wrestling.” Exhale.
Inhale.
“It’s fucking bullshit that I’m not allowed to use the sports facilities in
here.” Exhale.
Inhale.
“It angers me that Roman and Seth are dating while I sit here in this
shithole.” Exhale.
Inhale.
“I just wanna get fucking outta here.” Exhale.
Copeland and Dean stood there in silence for a moment and let sink in what had
just happened. With each exhale it had somehow become easier to open up to the
therapist. Dean had just shared some of the things he barely allowed himself to
think about. They took two more breaths together until the doctor lowered his
hands.
“That is a lot to be angry about, Dean. Thank you for sharing this with me. How
does your chest feel now, that you told me all these things.”
For a moment Dean was confused by the question because he felt like always but
when he gave his body a minute and listened to the anger in his head, it was
quieter now. His chest didn’t feel so tight, his head didn’t hurt so badly
anymore. “Uhm.. Feels better, yeah.” The doctor seemed satisfied.
“Next time you feel the anger coming, I want you to allow yourself to step back
from the situation and do exactly this. Find a quiet spot for yourself where
you can go to and address your anger. You don’t need to share it with others if
you don’t want to. If this happens during a session, let the responsible
therapist know. They will understand.”
“Okay?” For now Dean wasn’t all over with the idea but it had helped him to let
some of the frustration in his body go so maybe Copeland did know a little bit
about his issues.
“I have some homework for you until our next session on Thursday.” The doctor
went to where he had placed a bag next to the bench they had been sitting on
before. “You have a notebook in your room, right?”
“Yeah.”
“In that notebook you can write the requests you have and bring them to the
front desk. We then decide if you can have these things. You did that already
when you got here, right?”
“I did.” Dean thought back to who he had put in the request as a contact person
and it made his stomach feel weird.
“Good. I brought you another notebook. Until our next session I want you to
write down five things that have angered you and then add how you coped with
the anger in these specific situations.” He gave Dean the bag with the book
inside. There were some other things, he could see it on the shape of the bag
but he didn’t look inside of it yet. “Oh and I can solve one of the things that
anger you right now. For each therapy session that you visit you get a coin to
use the sports facilities. This is giving and taking, Dean. You give us
something, we give you something back. It’s all in your hands.” Copeland
clapped him on the shoulder. “Now come on. We got your stuff at the front desk.
Let’s go pick it up.”
That made Dean’s eyes light up. His things were here already? Typical for
Roman. He would do anything for Dean. He always had and always would regardless
of how Dean treated him. With the anger gone from his chest another feeling
started to spread in his body. Guilt started to make Dean’s heart feel heavy.
Chapter End Notes
     A lot going down here. Dean opening up, Seth and Roman admitting they
     miss Dean regardless of what happened. What do you think? Will the
     guilt now start eating Dean up or will he learn to cope with it. And
     if so, how should he ask Roman and Seth for forgiveness? Should he at
     all? Maybe it's better for him to start all over and leave everything
     in the past.
     Let me know what you guys think!
***** Chapter 19 *****
Chapter Notes
     Hello friends. Damn, has it really been two weeks since I last
     updated? I'm really sorry. I forgot to mention in the notes that I
     had to undergo surgery and would be out for a little. Those of you
     who follow me on tumblr might have known. Anyway, I'M BACK WITH YOU
     and I'm happy and healthy so don't worry your heads. Instead, dive
     back into this story. I know, lately, we've been hearing of Dean a
     lot but I can tell you, this chapter will put us on the right track
     even more. Dean has more therapy sessions and makes a friend. On
     replay, while writing this chapter: Miley Cyrus - Malibu
     TURN IT ON TO GET IN THE RIGHT MOOD FOR THIS
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Dean was sitting on his bed. He stared at the bag to his feet which was still
unopened and tried to breathe calmly. No one else was in his room which was
flooded in sunlight. Once again his chest felt heavy but this time it wasn’t
with anger. It was his heart which felt like a rock, which was beating so slow
it almost hurt. The lady at the reception had been nice and pretty but that
wasn’t what caused this mood swing.
When he and Copeland had gotten to the front desk he had seen the door close
behind the two men. One tall with his dark hair in a bun, the other male short
with his hair open. They were outside and he was in there. Dean had stopped in
the middle of the hallway as they were approaching the front desk and just
stared at the figures. Both men had wrapped an arm around the other, held on
tight to each other like they were afraid the soft breeze outside might shove
them apart. He had been standing there for only a couple of seconds when the
shorter figure had turned around.
Blue eyes met brown ones immediately and Dean could see it all. Could see the
hurt and the sadness, the worry and the sorry. It was all there regardless of
his faraway Seth had been. The blond had opened his mouth as if he wanted to
say something but realized the teen was too far away anyway. Before anything
else could happen Roman and Seth were out of sight and he was alone again. Ever
since then his heart had been beating slow.
Some part of reality was catching up to his brain which was clear for the first
time in so long. Seth loved him. And Roman loved him. Whatever he did, these
two loved him and they were with him, no matter how far away they were from
him. Through everything they were still the ones taking care of him, making
sure he had as much of his home with him, as he could in here. Dean had treated
both so badly, like they had no worth to him but that was a lie. Every second
he had shared with Seth had been precious, had made his life feel less
miserable than it was. It was so easy to laugh with the young boy yet, it had
been him who broke his young and innocent heart without ever feeling bad for
it.
He thought back to the first time Roman had hugged him. Home. That’s what he
had thought back then. If home-home didn’t feel like a secure and happy place,
Roman’s arms always had. And they had always been there, always. For year. And
his drunk ass had used the older man with no second thoughts. Guilt was so
heavy in Dean’s body, his eyes started burning. No.
Waking up for his trance he shook his head. Dean Ambrose did NOT cry. Not even
now. In order to push away the guilt he leaned down and opened up the bag. Dean
spread all of his things on the floor, laid out what had been in the bag. There
was more than what he had asked for. Roman and Seth knew him. They knew  him .
All of him. The gym shoes, Dean saw Roman in his head as he spoke to him.  In
case you want to get back to trainin g, the Samoan said.  And some more books
in case you get too bored in there .
“Fuck.” Quickly Dean grabbed the envelope that was there, still avoiding what
his body was begging for. It ripped apart because his fingers were shaking now
and the pictures and letters fell on his lap. Roman and Seth’s face were right
there. Smiling, ever so happy. And he was with them. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” He
wanted to be there right now. In Roman’s arms, with Seth in his arms. “Fucking,
fucked up shit!” As quickly as he could Dean went to the small bathroom to
check on himself in his mirror. It was really happening. Hot tears were
streaming down his unshaved face, made his eyes look red and puffy as a soft
sob escaped him. For the first time in over fifteen years Dean was crying. And
even more, he didn’t try fighting it.
The blond sat down on the closed toilet seat and leaned his face into his
hands, sobbing away heavily. He had fucked up so badly. It was his fault. His
and no one else’s fault that he was sitting in here with no way out other than
getting sober, getting rid of the thoughts. But maybe Copeland had been right.
Maybe this was his chance. He didn’t have to be like his mom. Dean could be
better. He was better. He’d get through the thirty days, he would do it to get
better and he would go and see Roman and Seth and tell them he loved them too.
Because even now, there was nothing that he wanted more than his boys. Not a
beer, not Reby, not even wrestling. Dean only wanted to be with Roman and Seth,
kiss them all over and tell them again and again.  I love you. Both of you.
With tears still on his face but his body feeling slightly calmer slowly, Dean
went back inside the room he lived in. He sat at the desk and grabbed the
notebook that was for his wishes.
I want to see Seth and Roman.
That was all he wrote down. With that note in his fingers he went downstairs to
the front desk for a second time today.
 
                                      ---
                                        
“I saw him.” Seth held Roman’s hand in his as they sat on a bench in the park.
Both were licking on the ice cream they had gotten and enjoyed the sun on their
faces. “He was right there.”
“Who?” Roman looked at Seth with a questioning face. The strawberry ice cream
had made his lips even pinker than usually.
“Dean.” Seth spoke so casually, as if Dean was still around them each day. As
if he had met him at the supermarket or gas station.
“What? Where?” He was completely surprised by this.
“At the ORC. He was there when we left. I turned to look back for a moment and
he stood right there and looked at me.” The teen starred in the distance as he
enjoyed the cold and sweet treat.
“What did he look like?” Excitement was clear in Roman’s voice. He wished he’d
seen him too.
“As always. Just with funny clothes. I guess the facility’s clothes. And he had
a beard. I didn’t know his beard was ginger. Has it always been?”
Roman was just thinking for a moment and shrugged. “No. Only when he turned
older.”
Now Seth turned to look at Roman. “I think when he comes back things will be
okay, Roman.” The older male looked back at him. “I think Dean will come back
and be with us. I have faith, he will.”
Silence fell down between the two of them for a couple of seconds only before
Roman nodded. “Yeah. I believe so too.”
 
                                      ---
                                        
Thursday morning. Group therapy. Dean was sitting there, listening to his
peers. They talked about the things they had done since the last session and
the two hours they were supposed to talk all together were almost over. He was
still silent the whole time but today he didn’t feel so annoyed anymore.
Instead he listened and tried to reflect on himself.
“Dean, maybe today you would like to share something too?” The therapist turned
his head and looked at him. So did everyone else and for the first time in his
life Dean felt something like nervousness.
“Uhm.. ‘m Dean.” His voice was low, barely anyone would be able to hear him so
he sat up more straight and cleared his throat. “I have a drinking and an anger
issue. Have no control over either and I’m here to get rid of the alcohol part
and to get better at dealing with the anger.”
 Okay, enough. He didn’t manage to share more. His throat felt too dry and his
body was suddenly exhausted. The therapist seemed to notice but gave him an
encouraging smile and left him alone.
 
Half an hour later Dean was sitting outdoor’s. There was still an hour until he
had to go meet Copeland and he just wanted to enjoy what prison would have
taken away from him. Freedome. Even if he couldn’t leave this place, it felt
less like a jail each second that he was here. His hands were pushed in the
pockets of his hoodie and he closed his eyes, letting the sun warm his face.
Yeah, this was nice. When he was out of here Dean would take Seth and Roman to
the lake. He’d sit in the sun too and watch his men spash each other with
water. Fuck, that view gave him so much hope. More than it should because he
didn’t even know whether Seth and Roman would forgive him.
“Mind if I sit?” Ugh, that ugly Irish accent woke him up from the daydreaming
and he looked at the other male with an almost plain face.
“Sure.” Dean scooted over and closed his eyes again. He wanted to go back to
his happy place with the two men but the new company didn’t let him.
“Was kinda expecting you to eat the therapist alive today after what we saw
earlier this week.” When the blond opened his eyes to look at Finn he frowned
slightly.
“Didn’t I mention I ain’t going to jail?” His tone wasn’t friendly.
“Yeah right, you did.” The brunette seemed to shy away. Fuck. Dean couldn’t
keep scaring people. He’d lose everyone he had, he would never meet any new
friends. Plus, Prince Devitt still made him curious.
“How does that other dude come out?” He asked directly. “Kinda wanna meet him.”
Finn shrugged and looked down at his feet. “I don’t know. Sometimes my mind
just goes blank. “I can’t force it or anything and I’d rather have this part of
me just go away.”
“Boring.” Dean rolled his eyes and looked into the distance again. Together
they sat there for a moment before he spoke again. “How does your anger feel
like?” It was such a random question, with so much meaning to him.
“I can’t feel it. When he comes out I can’t feel it and when I get angry I just
walk away from things. I don’t know what happens if I let all of those things
get to me. Maybe it triggers him too.”
“You that scared of that Devitt dude?”
“Yeah.”
“Man, what did he do?”
Finn wasn’t replying right away. “Made me lose someone that once was my life.”
Usually Dean would have made a joke about it but with what he went through not
too long ago he didn’t want to comment on it. So for him the conversation was
over.
He was just about to get up and leave when Finn spoke up again. “Want’a smoke?”
The older male offered.
Hell, should the day ever come that Dean would say no to a smoke he should be
locked down in this place forever. Since he had just stood up he sat back down
again, took the offered cigarette and lit it up. Fuck yes, great feeling. Even
though he knew he only had five cigarettes per day, the blond usually smoked
all of them in the morning already so he was glad if he had an extra one.
“Did your anger make you lose someone too?” It wasn’t any of Finn’s business.
Hell, the brunette barely knew more about Dean than his name yet he wanted to
walk all of this personal business. On the other hand, Dean had asked too.
“Yeah.” Was all he gave back. Finn turned to look at Dean and gave him an
understanding smile. That was it. They finished smoking and Finn left him alone
again. Hu. Funny. Dean felt completely fine. Nothing hurt, there was no anger.
Maybe opening up was doing him good after all.
 
Adam Copeland and he had met in his office this time. Dean had expected the
typical set up that he knew from TV but the office was the complete opposite.
It was bright and looked almost casual. Nice. A place where he could feel
comfortable. For the past half hour they had discussed the incident in Dean’s
bedroom. The therapist seemed positively surprised by this and even told Dean
that it had happened a lot earlier than he had expected it.
“I want to talk about one more thing today, then you’re free for today.”
Copeland was going through some of his notes.
“What would that be?” Dean felt like he had already talked about everything
that needed to be addressed for today.
“I picked up your note at the front desk.”
“Oh.” Dean shifted in his seat a little bit. It was a big demand, he knew.
“So you want to see Seth and Roman. Who are these two to you?”
The blond shifted. It was clear he was struggling to find the right words.
“Uhm.. I know Roman for.. I don’t know, a decade or so. Seth I met a year ago.”
“Okay. Who are these two to you?” The doctor repeated.
Dean stared down at his feet. “I don’t know.” He eventually said in his rough
voice. “They used to be my friends.. Lovers.. I don’t know.”
“Who are they to you now, Dean?” Copeland didn’t let it go. The therapist gave
his patient time to think, time to find the right words.
And it worked. Eventually, Dean looked up at him and answered very clearly.
“They are my reason to get better.”
Adam nodded and looked back at Dean. “Okay. It is good you have something to
hold on to. There is a visiting hour each friday and tuesday. How about, you
write a letter to the both of them and invite them?” The blond didn’t really
react to that. “You don’t think they would come?” Copeland asked as he saw his
struggling patient.
“I’m not so sure. I hurt them.” With a deep breath he sighed. “I pushed them
away. Maybe they don’t want me anymore, I don’t know. They triggered my trip
here so maybe they just wanted to get rid of me.” He shrugged.
“Or maybe they care about you and love you and want you to be good, Dean. Don’t
you believe that is possible?” The words were clear but seemed so uncertain in
Dean’s head. He wanted them to be true but didn’t allow himself to get up his
hopes. “You have the whole weekend to think about it. You and I will meet again
on Monday so we can see how you feel about it then. Because you want to get
better for them and you obviously want them in your life you should know, it is
typical in here to integrate a person from outside in the therapy of our
guests. We strongly believe that providing the possibility to be around a
family member or whoever might be closest to you, will contribute to the
outcome of the therapy. Usually we only invite one guest but maybe I can
arrange you getting two guests.”
“Make them part of my therapy? How?” Dean wasn’t over with this. Here was kind
of his private place where he opened up and talked about his feelings. He had
never done that before. To no one.
“As you said yourself, you hurt them so maybe they want to forget that pain
too. Whatever that arrangement between the three of you is, but inviting them
here and including them in one of our weekly sessions will mend the bond you
have with them. I can promise you that.”
“Do you really think it could work?” Wow, Dean had never felt this insecure
about anything ever in his life. Letting Roman and Seth see him with his guard
down like this, it would give them so many things they could hold against him
if they fought again. Or.. As Copeland had put it, it could mend their
relationship.
Again Dean saw them all at the beach, all of them splashing around in the
water, playing ball, wrestling in the sand, laughing and kissing each other.
Fuck it, he had to try. He had to try for the sake of himself and of them.
Before Copeland could reply Dean shrugged. “I’ll write the letter. I’ll invite
them.”
“Great. That is really great, Dean. When they come to visit for the guest hour
I will join for a couple of minutes, introduce myself and then you can invite
them to our sessions.”
“Wait what?  I  have to invite them?” Shock was written all over his face.
“Dean.” The doc smiled at him in an encouraging manner. “They will be here for
you. It is you who wants to get better. Ask them. If they care about you the
way you seem to care about them, they won’t hesitate to say yes.”
“Hm.” Dean didn’t say anything more to that. He’d have to open up to them
sooner or later but he’d rather do it later. It was just now that he was
trusting this man in front of him and the older male asked him to do it to two
more people? Even if it was Roman and Seth, it seemed like a hard thing to do.
They didn’t know what was going on in here, maybe they wouldn’t understand.
His mind was wandering and Copeland saw that. Instead of putting Dean in sorrow
he crapped a brown pouch from the table and opened it. He didn’t even announce
the change in topic he just went on naturally. “So here I have the coins you
have earned so far.”
“What coins?” It caught Dean’s attention immediately.
“You wanted to go work out, right?” Adam Copeland counted five of the coins and
handed them over to Dean. “There you go.”
“Dude these are way too many? I get one per session, right?”
Copeland shrugged. “Fuck the system. You opened up to me so quick and well, you
deserve it.”
Dean couldn’t help but started laughing about the words of his therapist. This
was not professional at all but it sounded so natural. He almost wished he had
met Adam Copeland under different circumstances. “Thanks, man. I appreciate
it.” And it was true. When he was with his therapist Dean felt easy, felt
thankful that someone took away the hurt and listened to him without laughing
about his issues, without being annoyed too.
“I know. Now go. I have to work.” Copeland was laughing too. Dean got up and
left the office.
What a day, full of so many new things. Last week this time he’d been sitting
in a courtroom, drunk and angry at the world. Funny, how things changed so
quickly. Funny, how life without alcohol could look like. Maybe he should have
quit drinking earlier.
With the coins in his hand Dean went back to his room to get changed for a nice
workout. Hell yes, he’d get strong and healthy. And next week he’d meet Seth
and Roman again. Full of courage and put in a good mood, the blond used the
short time he wanted to spend in his bedroom now to pin the two pictures of his
boys and himself to the wall right next to his bed. He’d see them. He would
make sure to see them next week.
Chapter End Notes
     Sounds like our boys will be back together soon, right?!
     Do you think Seth and Roman will show up after they read Dean's
     letter?
     What will he even write in there? And damn, how cool is Adam
     Copeland?
     Leave a comment and let me know what you think about this!
***** Chapter 20 *****
Chapter Notes
     Here we go! Next update will come during the following week instead
     of the weekend because my mom travelled here to come visit me so I
     will spend some time with her before feeding you with more updates.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Hey Roman and Seth,
I guess the two of you live together now so I don’t bother sending Seth a
separate letter to his parents house. Thank you for dropping by my shit the
other day. When I came to the ORC I had promised myself that I would never
contact you again because I blamed you for putting me in this spot. But my
opinion kinda changed. It’s tough to explain it in a letter so I just wanna ask
the two of you to swing by on friday. There’s some time to visit during the day
and maybe we can talk.
Dean
 
Seth had read out the letter for Roman and himself. When they had picked it up
from the mailbox first it was a surprise that it was addressed to both of their
last names but now that they knew the content it wasn’t such a huge surprise.
Dean only knew that Roman and Seth were dating and that they seemed to spend a
lot of time together. He knew nothing about the arrangement with Seth only
being here on weekends. Even though, for a moment Seth was reminded of what he
had thought about many times too.
The teen came to Roman’s place almost every day after school now and only went
home for dinner and to sleep there. Sure, they dropped by his parents twice a
week or so to spend some time with them too but sometimes it truly felt like he
was already living with Roman. And if he wasn’t so afraid of breaking his mom’s
heart over it, he probably would have asked if he could move in with his
boyfriend. Their relationship was steady, Roman was making good money with
wrestling the closer he got to the title and Seth’s grades were on point even
though he hang out with the older male so much.
On the other hand, there was a lot the teen had to figure out now. In a couple
of months he would graduate. He’d be finishing high school. He’d turn 18 too
and travel to Malibu with Roman. Whenever he thought about that he got a little
nervous. It was clear that his boyfriend had given him that gift to get the two
of them some privacy, but what if Roman wouldn’t like what Seth had to offer?
What if he’d be in too much pain to do it or get so nervous that he couldn’t
get it up.
No, no, no. He always pushed away these thoughts. The Samoan loved him, loved
him so much that he wasn’t even bothered not to share more than kisses for now.
He was involved with his family and everything was alright with the two of
them. Everything apart from one piece that was missing. And now that they had
read the letter, that was more present than ever.
With big eyes Seth turned his head to look at Roman. The older male’s mind was
working, he was biting the insides of his cheeks and hummed as if he wasn’t
sure what to say now. Because he didn’t say anything, Seth had time to work up
some courage.  Say it. He wants it too but he’s too scared. Be brave. For both
of you.  He told himself again and again until he screamed them at himself in
his head. “I’ll go.” Seth said in a determined tone. “I want to hear what he
has to say and I miss him like hell. And you should come too because you miss
him just as much and you need this like I need it too.”
Roman now looked back at Seth. He didn’t seem to be over with the idea. “Stop
it. Stop overthinking this. See, that’s a problem grown ups have. You think too
much.” Seth now cupped Roman’s cheek in his hand and gave him a soft smile.
“Remember when you told him he needs to be in there to get better?” The older
one nodded. “Now he is in there to get better and we should keep supporting him
to do so, right?” He nodded again. “So even if he just wants to get closure, we
should go. Maybe we will also get the chance to either say goodbye or.. Maybe
things can work out. We won’t know until we go and see him.”
“I don’t know, Seth.” Roman finally said. “He might hurt you again.”
“Then I will have you there to protect me, right? You’d never let anyone hurt
me.”
“Never.”
“See. Come on. If you don’t want to do it for him, please do it for me.”
The Samoan thought about it some more before he took a big breath and swallowed
down his worry. “I’ll pick you up from school tomorrow and we will go there
immediately. We can only stay for an hour because I have to go to the arena
earlier.” Since the finale of the tournament was coming up in a couple of weeks
Roman was even more focussed on his matches.
“Thank you.” Seth leaned in to hug Roman and nuzzled into the crook of his
neck. “It’s going to be okay.” Seth couldn’t promise but he had high hopes.
After all this was Dean, his Dean.  Their  Dean.
 
                                      ---
                                        
“I don’t know, Copeland. Don’t think they’ll show up. I’ll go back to my room.”
The two men were sharing a table in the public area of the ORC and were sipping
some coffee. Dean was a nervous wreck today. When he had shown up to his
therapy session in the morning he could barely sit still and had kept walking
around in the therapist’s office.
“Dean, sit down. We have waited for less than ten minutes. Visiting hour just
started. And didn’t you say Seth got off school at two anyway? They will need
some time to get here, right? Just sit and wait. I’m here with you.” The doctor
tried to calm Dean down.
It was just a little past two and Adam was probably right but Dean had no
patience for this today. He barely slept because he’d kept thinking about ways
to approach the two of them. Maybe they’d only show up to tell him he should
never contact them again. Maybe they’d come and tell him they hoped he’d never
return. Or maybe they just wouldn’t show up at all. The dirty blond was nervous
and was chewing on his fingernails instead of drinking the coffee that was in
front of his nose.
Time just wouldn’t pass and Dean kept staring at the clock on the wall.
Sometimes his eyes wandered to the door that lead outside, or inside depending
on the side one was coming from, but Seth and Roman were nowhere to be seen. It
took another thirty minutes until he heard it. It was so clear he could not be
mistaken. Dean couldn’t make out the words but he could clearly hear Seth’s
voice and seconds later the teen stepped into his sight.
Their eyes met immediately and Dean’s mouth went dry. He looked good. His hair
was open, curled all around his head because the wind had blown the dark strand
around wildly. As usually he wore his skinny black jeans and a hoodie of some
band or whatever that logo was supposed to mean. There were ridiculously cute
glasses on the back of his nose as he looked right back at Dean and that shy
and carefuly smile that begged for no one to hurt him. And fuck.. He’d hurt
him. Hurt him so bad that maybe he could never fix it.
Seconds later another figure stepped into sight. Tall and all muscles under the
dress shirt which dared to spring open any second. Roman. Handsome as ever.
Dressed well, hair put in a bun. Dean’s heartbeat picked up so heavily that it
almost hurt inside of his chest and he had to grab his shirt where his heart
was pounding behind his skin and bones.
By the hand Seth pulled Roman into the room towards Dean. The dirty blond
wanted to get up, wanted to jump right into their arms but Copeland had talked
to him about that earlier. Regardless of the doctor’s opinion that things would
work out, he needed to give the two of them the space to decide how much they
trusted him now.
The two figures came closer and Dean got up from the chair he was sitting on.
He wanted to look at the two of them properly if that was the only thing he’d
be allowed to do. The eyes of the dirty blond felt hot and his fingers were ice
cold, so cold they were slightly shaking. With the two of them looking at him
with expecting eyes he didn’t even know who he wanted to address first. Dean
forgot every single word that he had prepared in his head to say to the two of
them and when he opened his mouth he choked on his own tongue.
“You must be Seth and Roman, I take it.” Thank fuck Copeland existed. The
doctor got up and reached out his hand to greet the guests. “I’m Adam Copeland,
Dean’s therapist. Nice to meet you.” There was a friendly smile on his face
which Dean didn’t see because all he could do was stare at these beautiful men.
It seemed like Roman wasn’t exactly sure what that look meant and after shaking
Copeland’s hand, introducing himself and sitting down with Seth he wrapped his
arm around the younger one in a protective manner. He didn’t want to speak for
now, wanted to hear what Dean had to say. All his guards were up regardless to
how he felt right now.
Dean looked good, looked healthy and sober. He had shaved and a healthy skin
color. Still, he was skinnier than usually but that could probably be fixed.
Roman’s stomach felt slightly sick. He had to be so careful around Dean even
though he still felt it, still felt the love he had for the other man.
“How are you?” Seth was the first one to speak. He was the youngest one here
yet, to Roman it appeared like he was also the bravest besides the therapist of
course. “You look good.” The innocent voice was see through. Roman heard all
the hope and excitement. Sometimes Seth was like a puppy, forgetting what he
felt just minutes ago. It had only been back in the car that he was close to
tears because he had finally admitted that he was also scared to see Dean. Of
course Roman had comforted him, took over as the strong man he was and hugged
Seth, told him he wouldn’t let anyone hurt him. Now he seemed to be only
concerned and full of hope.
Dean too, was behaving a little strange. Almost stiff like he wanted to make
completely sure Roman and Seth could see that he was better. But knowing his
friend this behavior could mean anything. Dean’s issues were never really
understandable because he always reacted differently. Usually loud and violent
but you could never know when he would strike.
“I’m good.” And the words sounded so sincere, clear and honest. Roman wanted to
believe them but maybe he had believed Dean once too often already. “I feel
really good.” Short silence. “How are you? Seth?” Then he turned his head and
the blue orbs focussed on him. “Roman? How are you?” The Samoan didn’t feel
ready to speak up just yet. Suspiciousness was still too thick in his head.
“We’re really good, Dean.” Seth answered for the both of them. He sensed his
tense Roman was. “A little surprised to be sitting here now but..” Seth looked
down at the table, not sure whether it was okay to say it. Hopefully Roman
wouldn’t get mad. “But.. Also glad we came here. Glad to see you. You look
good.” Silently Roman took a deep breath. For a moment he wished he had some
more of that childlike innocence that Seth had. Maybe he could open up to Dean
more easily but there was so much pain and anger in his chest too that he could
barely reach through to the love. All this time he had missed Dean and now that
he was right there, he wanted to tell him all the things he did wrong. But he
couldn’t. For Seth’s sake he wouldn’t.
Copeland sensed the tension at the table. For now he wasn’t in the position to
really utilize his knowledge about how to make people open up because he
technically needed Roman’s permission first but the whole situation was too
heartbreaking. Dean had been so nervous all week, talking about barely anything
else than what would happen if they came here and now nothing really happened
because one was so excited that he couldn’t breath in a normal pace and the
other one refused to speak at all. He needed to help the situation, wanted to
so badly but he needed to stop to get personally involved into this.
“How are dad and mom doing?” Dean tried to bring up another topic, obviously
didn’t want the conversation to die but struggled to address what he really
wanted to say.
“They are fine. Dad is working a lot, mom is at home taking care of everything.
You know how it is.” Seth replied again. Under the table he squeezed Roman’s
leg because he wanted to encourage him to say something too but the oldest
seemed to refuse still. Ugh, his boyfriend could be so stubborn at times.
Dean turned his head to look at Copeland. He could need some encouragement too
and in his therapist he would find it. Adam had helped him so much in the past
two weeks and he wasn’t leaving him alone with the situation now either. The
doctor gave him a smile, nodded and looked at the other two again. It was
important that Dean knew someone was on his side in this.
“Look.. Uhm..” Dean was searching for the right words to say but there was only
one phrase that would express it the right way, one sentence that he had never
used and meant it. Not since he was a little boy seeking the forgiveness of his
mom. For three days he had practiced in front of a mirror had looked at himself
and said it over and over again but now it was just as hard as it had been the
first time. He needed to push through though. There was no other way. One more
deep breath and then he looked up, right into their faces, first Seth and then
Roman to make sure he heard each word. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything I
put you through. I.. I have no apology for any of the things I did to either of
you other than that I was a stupid asshole. It’s my fault.”
And there it was. It was all out in the open. Dean had let down his guard and
was ready for Roman to explode and put him down, tell him he’d never forgive
him. Ready for Seth who’d probably cry soon the way he knew him. Because no one
else was speaking Dean sensed that he should say more. It wasn’t enough. He
wished it would be but it just wasn’t.
“I should have listened to you Roman and should have dropped the alcohol long
ago. I should have been more honest with the both of you, I..” He couldn’t
finish his sentence. Not without swallowing own the lumb in the back of his
throat. “And I want to fix things between all of us because.. Because I fucking
miss you and.. Ah fuck.”
Dean threw up his hands and leaned back in his chair. He’d promised himself
after that breakdown last week that he would never cry again but his eyes were
burning so badly and his mouth was so dry he could feel the tears building
within seconds. “Fuck guys, I just want to apologize and make things right. I
want to come home.” It didn’t matter that he’d feared letting his guards down
the whole time. It was too late now. The wetness was running down his cheeks
and his voice was trembling. “I know you can’t forgive me just like this but
please, give me a chance.”
Okay enough. Copeland had to cut in before what Dean was doing would turn into
begging. Besides, the second Dean had started crying he had finally seen a
change in the older male that was sitting across from him. His eyes had turned
almost surprised. “I will cut in quickly before this goes down the wrong way.
Dean and I talked and I originally advised him to be the one asking you guys
but things are going a little different now apparently and as I take it
everything with the three of you is a little different anyway.” Hm, could the
doctor really sense the triangle of love between them? Maybe they were more
obvious than they thought. “Speaking from a doctor’s perspective now, you
helped Dean a lot by bringing him in here already but I believe he could use
some more of your help. And this I also confirm with just my personal opinion.
I think..”
“No!” Now Dean interrupted him. Even though his voice was shaky and he wiped
away some tears he looked at the doctor and shook his head. “I need to ask
them. Just give me a second.”
And now, for the first time, Roman spoke up. His voice was completely different
than what Copeland had expected. He’d expected to find all the anger and grief
there but it was nothing but warm and welcoming and caring. “Dean? What’s
wrong?”
The blue eyes were surrounded by red now but he had managed to look back at the
Samoan. “I need your help. I know it’s a lot to ask but I need it for the sake
of all of us.”
“What do you mean?” The tall male reached out for one of Dean’s hands. Copeland
had advised Dean to avoid physical contact for now because it could easily
irritate the tense situation but he saw how it seemed to calm Dean down, that
he didn’t break into heavy sobbing but swallowed and breathed away most of the
tears.
“Fuck, I just want all of us to be okay. I want to fix everything. Not you,
Roman. I know you probably said it a hounded times to me, if not a thousand,
and you probably told Seth too. But I want to fix this. And I need to because I
broke it and..” He swallowed again. It seemed to be a huge deal for Dean to
ask. Maybe he really did recognize what damage he had done and that he was in
no position for demands.”.. And I just need one more thing of you.”
Now Seth reached out too, put his much smaller hand on top of the two connected
hands. In every other situation Copeland would have found this a little funny
but now it seemed so fitting and it seemed to work. Within seconds Dean seemed
calm enough to speak properly again. “Please come to therapy with me.”
Oh. It wasn’t what either Seth or Roman had expected because they had thought
something bad would come up now but in their ears this sounded maybe slightly
difficult but not bad. “I want to fix us.” Dean looked at both of them, sincere
and with all of his emotions visible on his face. For the first time in forever
he felt relieved. Even if not everything was said, nothing was fixed and he
didn’t know their reaction yet, he had put out there what he truly felt.
Copeland’s words from this morning were true.  If you keep swallowing Dean, one
day you’re so full, you’ll throw up . And Dean had just done that. He’d spit
out all that he had to give right now and now, even though there was a loud
storm inside his head, he felt calm.
Chapter End Notes
     Oh snap! Dean put it all out there. FINALLY he opened up to the
     people he loves most.
     But how will they react?
     What will they say?
     What do you think how things will be going?
     Let me know in the comment section!
Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed
their work!