Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/5036281.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Rape/Non-Con, Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      A_Song_of_Ice_and_Fire_-_George_R._R._Martin, Game_of_Thrones_(TV)
  Relationship:
      Ramsay_Bolton/Theon_Greyjoy, Theon_Greyjoy/Robb_Stark_(hinted)
  Character:
      Ramsay_Bolton, Theon_Greyjoy
  Additional Tags:
      Alternate_Universe_-_Modern_Setting, Mental_Institutions, Emotional
      Manipulation, Cutting, Self-Harm, Homophobic_Language, Ableist_Language,
      Drugged_Sex
  Stats:
      Published: 2015-10-20 Completed: 2015-10-25 Chapters: 2/2 Words: 4069
****** Committed ******
by VagrantWriter
Summary
     "You’re not normal anymore, Theon. From now on, you’ll always be that
     kid who spent an undisclosed amount of time in a juvenile psychiatric
     ward. Looks great on a résumé, trust me.”
Notes
     So, trigger warnings. Literally. Ramsay tries his best to trigger
     Theon.
  This work was inspired by
      Inspirational_art:_Asylum by WitchesBrew
***** Chapter 1 *****
Ramsay would be remiss if he didn’t admit he liked pretty things. But even more
than pretty, he liked fragile things. And the precious little thing curled in
the corner was calling out to be broken.
Ramsay knew his type. Oh, yes, he knew that type. Poor little rich boy, Daddy
doesn’t love me. Every corded muscle in the boy’s meager frame was starved for
affirmation. He wanted it, needed it, but he’d settle for attention. That was
probably what had landed him here. He’d acted out and been locked away with the
loonies.
Gods, Ramsay wanted to give him the special attention he craved. Those eyes, so
large as they flicked back and forth across the page. They were a lovely shade.
Ramsay would love to watch them bulge and become red as he crushed the boy’s
windpipe. He’d love to see them tear up as he yanked his hands through that
messy hair.
Too bad the orderlies were most vigilant in the common areas. Even if their
attention was mostly on that one kid who couldn’t stop masturbating in public
or the other who was always banging on the walls, it wouldn’t be smart to try
anything now.
He had to make do with catching the boy’s eyes instead. It was no difficult
task. The kid was hardly even reading his book, setting it down every other
second to adjust the blanket over his thin frame and look around the room. His
head popped up like a startled rabbit’s when Ramsay came to sit across from him
at his little out-of-the-way table.
“Hey,” Ramsay whispered, deliberately low so that the boy would slink closer to
hear better. “You new here? Haven’t seen you around.”
“I…” He tucked his legs up under him and pulled the blanket tighter. “Yeah.
Last week.”
“And they put you in with the general population already?” Ramsay whistled.
The boy began to retreat into his blanket.
“Hey, you don’t have to be scared.” Ramsay flashed his straight, white teeth.
“No one’s going to hurt you. And if they try, they’ll have to go through me
first.” He leaned forward with his elbows on the table. “I’m Ramsay, by the
way.”
“Theon,” the boy responded in kind. He slowly untangled himself.
Once free from his blanket, it was clear just how thin and fragile he really
was. The hospital-issue robes didn’t do anything for his gangly limbs, and his
hands and bare feet looked oversized. He was an awkward kid, then. So
endearing. Ramsay wanted to snap those brittle bones and hear him scream.
“Theon,” he repeated. It didn’t suit the boy. He smiled anyway. “So, what you
in for, Theon?”
Theon cast his eyes downwards, shy, embarrassed.
“It’s okay, no one here’s going to judge you.” Ramsay sat up straight in his
chair, allowing the timid animal space. “We’re all mad here, after all. Me, for
instance…” He’d have to tone this down. “My old man sent me here. Behavioral
issues.”
Theon looked up. Ah, that was the right thing to say then. Did Daddy send you
here, too, little boy? Did he lock you away because you’re an embarrassment? It
was almost too easy to be any real fun, but something so perfect didn’t just
fall into your lap every day.
Ramsay leaned back, both to give the illusion of exasperation and to give his
prey more room. He had to keep from smirking when Theon began to lean forward
to close the distance between them. “It’s not fair, you know,” Ramsay continued
nonchalantly. “You spend all your time trying to do this or do that, prove to
your parents that you’re worth something, but take one little step out of
line…” He shook his head in disgust.
“Y-yeah.” Theon itched at his arm. “I know that feeling. My dad sent me here
too.”
“Dads are the worst.”
Theon nodded.
“So…what was it? Caught doing drugs? Nervous breakdown? Hell, there’s even a
kid in here who got committed because his parents couldn’t deal with the fact
that he’s gay.” He knew he’d hit close when Theon’s pretty, pale face turned a
slight shade of pink. “It’s all bullshit, but there’s nothing you can do. No
one’s going to emancipate a minor who’s been committed to a loony bin.”
Theon tugged on the sleeve of his shirt. “I…belong here. My mom, she…”
Mommy probably fought Daddy about sending you here. Is that it, Theon? You miss
your mommy? “Crazy runs in the family?” Ramsay finished.
Theon grimaced at the wording but nodded.
“Mine too. Gods, my dad is so fucked up… If I told you about his problems,
you’d wonder why he isn’t locked up instead of me.” He could tell he was
beginning to make the kid uncomfortable. The way he shifted his gangly limbs,
the way he looked around the room. He was a caged animal, and Ramsay had only
just begun to rattle his bars. “Good news is, once you turn eighteen, no one
can keep you here against your will. I’m counting down the days until my
eighteenth birthday. How long do you have?”
“Year and a half.” Theon ran his skeletal fingers along the smooth surface of
the table, eyes studying the grain of the wood. He was contemplative for a
moment, probably counting out all the days and hours he would be holed up in
this place until then. “I’ll never graduate on time now,” he said at last with
a defeated sigh.
“You could always get out early.”
There was a sad hope in the boy’s eyes as he looked up this time.
“Yeah, some kids get out as early as six months. You just have to go to all
your appointments and group therapy sessions and convince everyone you’re not
out of your fucking mind.” Ramsay laughed. “Not me, of course. I’m pretty sure
my dad’s paying good money for them to keep me here. And not that I’m too eager
to get back into the public education system.”
“Me neither.” Theon sniffled. “I mean, I was never that good of a student,
but…I feel like now I’m going to miss so much.”
“What? Like pep rallies and sports games?” Ramsay laughed. “Or maybe prom? You
got a sweetheart you were thinking of asking?”
Theon turned even pinker.
“That’s for normal kids. You’re not normal anymore, Theon. From now on, you’ll
always be that kid who spent an undisclosed amount of time in a juvenile
psychiatric ward. Looks great on a résumé, trust me.”
He moaned and buried his face in his arms. The edges of his sleeves rode up his
arms, and Ramsay smiled to see the bandages underneath.
“Oh, so that’s why you’re here.”
Theon looked up. His eyes were bloodshot, sunken into his pale face.
Ramsay nodded to his exposed wrist. “You’re an attention cutter.”
“What?” Theon sat up straight and tugged on his sleeves.
“Yeah, everyone knows that you only cut on your wrists so people will notice.
The really hard-core cutters make sure it’s somewhere hidden.”
Theon grabbed for the blanket and pulled it around himself. “No. That’s not—”
“The question is, how much of a bullshitter are you? Did you cut diagonally or
vertically? Bullshitters always cut diagonally. Less chance of bleeding out.”
He was trying so hard to hide it, but he was trembling under his blanket. “I
didn’t—it was only once.”
“Yeah? Someone found you before you could get too far? You probably planned
that, too. Five minutes before Daddy gets home, you go into the bathroom and
get a straight razor. That’s the smartest way to do it. Least amount of mess,
least amount of effort. How freaked out were your folks when they found you
bleeding all over the bathroom?”
“It was my sister,” Theon answered halfheartedly.
“Bummer. I mean, I get it. You go through all this effort, and Daddy doesn’t
even have the decency to notice. Worse, he tosses you in here so he can
continue to ignore you.” Ramsay shook his head again.
Theon stood, blanket wrapped around him like a cape. “I didn’t—it wasn’t for
that. I just—I just had a moment of weakness.”
Ramsay leaned his elbows on the table and his head in his hands. “Hey, man, you
don’t need to justify yourself to me. If anyone understands what you’re going
through, it’s me.” He grinned.
Theon shrank away from him. Oh, if the two of them were alone right now. He’d
keep unraveling this thing, pulling and pulling until he’d found every single
seam. It was intoxicating already, the reek of fear and uncertainty radiating
from this creature. He wanted to back him up into a corner, literally, and feel
the shuddering as his hands explored the thin body. He’d drag all sorts of
noises out of that throat, begging and pleading. He’d do it right now if the
orderly on duty wasn’t already looking their way since Theon had bolted from
his seat.
“I have to go,” Theon said weakly. Of course, he didn’t have anywhere to be. He
turned and walked across the room and sat down in a chair looking out the
window. Every so often, he would look up and glance Ramsay’s way. Their eyes
would meet and Theon would look away again just as quickly.
“Okay, Ramsay,” the orderly said wearily over Ramsay’s shoulder, “time for your
two o’clock appointment.”
Ramsay stood obediently. He would have to be on his best behavior over the next
few weeks before he could really set his plans into motion. That was okay,
though. He watched Theon rocking back and forth in the chair as the orderly
escorted him from the lounge. Theon wouldn’t be getting out of here in six
months. Ramsay would make sure of it.
***** Chapter 2 *****
Chapter Notes
     Please note the changed rating and warnings.
“Theon. Psst. Theon, wake up.” Ramsay shined his flashlight into Theon’s eyes
as the other boy blinked back into consciousness. He seemed at first uncertain
about where he was, then uncertain about how and why Ramsay was in his room in
the middle of the night. “I’ve got a gift for you.”
That got an immediate response. There was fear along with uncertainty now, and
the mix of it on Theon’s face went straight to Ramsay’s cock. He’d put the
other boy on edge. Theon had no doubt already learned that nothing good came
from Ramsay’s “gifts.”
The first had come a week after Theon had moved in. Ramsay had pulled the
skinny boy into one of the out-of-the-way corners of the common area and
lowered his voice to give the illusion of utmost confidentiality. “Hey, I just
wanted to apologize if I made you uncomfortable last week. You know I were just
teasing, right?”
Theon stared at the ground and nodded. His hands gripped for a blanket that
wasn’t there.
“I’ve got a pretty dark sense of humor,” Ramsay went on, “and I make a lot of
inappropriate jokes. It’s just how I deal with all the shit, you know? And I
figure, if you can’t laugh at yourself, what can you laugh at?”
Theon lifted his head ever so slightly and nodded again. It was so becoming,
the way his eyebrows rose when he was trying to think. It obviously didn’t come
easily to him.
“Look.” Ramsay leaned in close, his voice taking on a conspiratorial tone. “I
want us to be friends. I really do.”
More thinking. If he continued on this path, he’d hurt himself. “Why?”
“Because you remind me of myself when I first got here. Jittery. Nervous.
Jumping at everything. No friends to speak of.”
Theon swallowed thickly.
“I have something for you. A…gift. Think of it as a good-will gesture. To prove
that I’m looking out for you.” He reached into the pocket of his hospital
robes. “Hold out your hands.”
Theon watched nervously as Ramsay’s hand made the journey from his pocket to
his cupped palms. Once the gift had exchanged hands, Theon turned it over and
over until he could see the label. Even then, it took a moment to understand
what Ramsay had given him.
“Deodorant?” he asked.
“I just thought…if you didn’t have any…”
“I have deodorant.”
Ramsay looked over his shoulder, and after he’d made sure they were alone, he
hunched over and lowered his voice. Theon leaned in to hear. “I mean…I don’t
mean to offend you or anything—andI, personally, don’t have a problem with
it—but some of the guys have been saying stuff behind your back.”
Theon’s eyes went wide, like a deer right before you plowed into it with your
car. “L-like what?”
“They have a name for you. They call you Reek.” Ramsay put his hands up,
disavowing himself of culpability. “I tell them to stop whenever I hear that
sort of thing. Just because nobody ever sees you showering doesn’t mean—”
“I shower at night.” Theon gripped Ramsay’s gift tightly, looking unsure if he
should be mortified or angry. “I requested it that way and they said it was
fine. I didn’t think it would—”
“It’s okay. I understand.” Ramsay patted him on the back, and Theon tensed.
“You don’t ever have to justify yourself to me, Theon. Next time I hear someone
badmouthing you, I’ll step in a put the fear of the Old Gods into them, hear?
Because we’re buddies now, you and me. And buddies look out for each other,
right?”
“Right,” Theon agreed meekly. It was a good look on him, this sad sort of
acceptance. “I…uh, thanks for the gift.” He stuffed it hurriedly into his
pocket and spent the rest of the free hour with his hands shoved
inconspicuously in there with it, looking over his shoulders to make sure
nobody had noticed.
After that, he took to showering with the other boys in the morning, and Ramsay
delighted in catching glimpses of him running from the shower stalls, drenching
wet, with a towel wrapped around him to cover himself. He always looked so
terrified, like this was prison and he wasn’t supposed to drop the soap. Ramsay
knew where his real anxiety was and roped Damon, the best-looking of his
“friends”—always a loose term in this setting—into harassing the other boy.
“Greyjoy,” Damon would say, “stop checking me out, you faggot. Just because I
threatened to kill my girlfriend doesn’t mean I’m gay for you or anyone else.”
The other boys would laugh and Theon would run for safety with his head down.
He even began undressing in the shower, so that his robes were partially wet
when he emerged. It was almost a shame to miss the brief glimpses of flesh
Ramsay could manage to glimpse beneath Theon’s towel. He’d never considered
himself gay or straight or any of those stupid labels; he saw bodies in terms
of what he could do to them. And there was so much he could do to Theon’s. It
was a worthwhile sacrifice to see the other so rattled, so frightened and
uncomfortable in his body. And there would be plenty of time for the other
stuff later.
Now he had the boy under him, all big eyes and sweat-dampened hair. His
shoulders were thin where Ramsay had shaken him awake. His little rabbit had
lost some weight since he’d been admitted.
“H-how did you get in here?” Theon’s voice was tiny and quiet in the darkness.
“It helps to be friends with the staff.” Ramsay twirled the keyring on his
finger. The keys rattled together, and the janitor’s flashlight keychain sent a
beam of high-powered light dancing across the room. Ben Bones never asked any
questions. He didn’t care, and Ramsay had to admire that about the man. “Same
way I got into the med cabinet to get this.” He pulled Theon’s gift out of his
pocket.
Theon sat up. “What is that? Are you—?”
“Calm down, it’s a clean needle.” Ramsay yanked the safety tip off the syringe
with his teeth. “It’s something to help you relax and have a bit of fun. You’ve
been so tense lately, I thought you might enjoy it.”
“What is it?” Theon repeated.
“Ketamine,” Ramsay answered, brandishing the thin syringe. He could easily just
jab it into Theon’s arm, but that wasn’t the point. You couldn’t force a gift
on someone. “They use it for the depressives and schizos to help them calm
down, but it also gives you an amazing trip. I promise you, you’ll feel
awesome.”
Theon looked far from convinced. “I’ll get in trouble.”
“So what? Worst case scenario, you’re banned from movie nights for a month.
Look, I’m the one taking the bigger risk here. I’m the one who broke out of his
room after curfew, jimmied open the door to the pharmacy, and took the needle
from the med cabinet. The least you could do is be grateful and show a little
enthusiasm, you know.”
Theon nodded. Good dog. Don’t want to be ungrateful now.
“How do I—?”
“Give me your arm.” Ramsay took hold of his wrist and drew his arm forward,
exposing the soft and sickly skin underneath. Even with the little light, he
could see the blue veins, fat like his father’s leeches bloated with blood. It
was easy to slip the tip of the needle into the crook of Theon’s arm, to
depress the syringe and send the drug streaming into Theon’s system.
Theon took it well. He took it so well. Ramsay wanted to stroke his hair and
tell him what a good boy he was. Instead, he pulled the needle free and sat
back to watch.
He didn’t have long to wait. Within minutes, Theon was melting into his
pillows, arms outstretched and draped over the sides of the bed. “Ramsay, it
feels…” A goofy smile spread across his face. “It doesn’t hurt. Nothing hurts.”
“Good, good.” Ramsay hopped up onto the bed and straddled Theon’s hips. Theon
didn’t seem to mind at all. “Does it feel good?”
Theon’s eyes rolled back into his head as he thought about it. “It feels
like…swimming. Like my feet aren’t touching the bottom.” He kicked out limply
with his feet and giggled. “It feels like those aren’t my feet at all.”
Ramsay ran a hand through Theon’s hair, down his cheek. “You’re acting silly,
Theon.”
“Am I?” Theon’s smile broadened. He was out of his fucking mind.
“It’s good to see you relaxing for once.” Ramsay sat up so he could pull the
thin covers back. He bunched them up and kicked them to the floor. Then he
began pulling Theon’s shirt up over his head.
Theon sat up and raised his arms to help. He didn’t question what was
happening. In fact, he giggled and kicked again. “Are we going swimming?”
“Sure.” Ramsay tossed the hospital’s sleeping shirt away, then hooked his
thumbs into the elastic waistband of Theon’s pants and began pulling them down.
Theon bucked his hips up so Ramsay could pull them off as well. “You know,
you’re awfully beautiful under all of these.”
Theon flopped back into his pillows with a round of girlish giggling. “You have
to undress too.”
That was the plan, but Ramsay acted like he was obliging. He was aching stiff
by the time he got his pants off, and putting the condom on was easy once he
got past fumbling with the wrapper. Theon, on the other hand, wasn’t hard at
all, and Ramsay doubted he’d be able to get an erection with all the muscle
relaxant in his system. Experimentally, he wrapped a hand around Theon’s cock.
Theon moaned beautifully and arched his back. He lifted his head, looking a bit
confused now, but the drugs were still in full effect. “Are we…we shouldn’t,”
he slurred. “I don’t…I’m not a…” He pushed ineffectively at Ramsay’s chest.
“Shh. It’s okay, Theon. I’ve always said you never have to justify yourself to
me.” He smiled to feel Theon stirring in his grip. “It’s only you and me here.
Nobody’s going to judge you.”
“Are you sure?”
Ramsay nodded, and that was the end of any protest.
Theon dropped his arms. He squirmed a bit when Ramsay lifted his legs and began
feeling around for his entrance. “This your first time?”
“Yes,” Theon answered plainly. He was so relaxed and loose, he didn’t even
flinch when Ramsay jammed a finger inside of him. “Is this…real life? Is this
what it’s supposed to feel like?”
“It’s fine.” Ramsay crawled his way up Theon’s body and planted a kiss on his
mouth. Theon was like a dead fish under him, breathing heavy, heart rate
erratic, eyes serene and unseeing. “It’s normal. It’s good. See?” He stuck
another finger in.
Theon nodded. “Yeah. I don’t know what…I guess I’m just a little…”
He was already so loose and not fighting Ramsay’s intrusion. First time or not,
he wouldn’t need a lot of preparation. Ramsay repositioned himself, Theon’s
legs draped over his shoulders, and entered.
Theon squeezed his eyes closed, but when he opened them, the same look of
passive pleasure was there. “Feels…like I need to shit,” he said.
Ramsay laughed, then Theon laughed, and they laughed together as Ramsay started
to pound into him. It felt amazing, so tight and unused. The ketamine had
relaxed him, but no amount of drugs would ever get rid of that virgin
tightness. It had to have hurt, but Theon couldn’t comprehend it at the moment,
his body too numb. Instead, he stared into Ramsay’s eyes with a look of
complete devotion.
“Why are you so nice to me?”
Ramsay gave a particularly brutal thrust that would leave bruises later. “Like
I said, I like you.”
“Nobody likes me. I’m unlikeable.”
“Who said that to you?” Another thrust. “Tell me and I’ll cut his fucking guts
out.”
Theon lowered his eyes. “Nobody’s ever liked me. Not my father, not my brothers
or my sister, not…Robb.”
“Robb? The sweetheart you’re taking to the prom?”
“No. I wouldn’t…he doesn’t know. He can’t know.”
“Just as well.” Ramsay changed the angle slightly and found himself getting
even deeper. Still no real reaction from Theon. “He doesn’t deserve you.” He
tightened his grip on Theon’s hips to gain better leverage. “Nobody deserves
you.” And they didn’t. Not like Ramsay did. True, Theon was useless and
probably not very good for all the traditional things. But if they couldn’t see
how he came to life, how he made such beautiful noises when given the least bit
attention…well, that was something Ramsay would keep to himself. For himself.
“Feel…weird.” Theon’s head lolled back on his pillow. “Are these my hands? I
can’t…”
“Shh,” Ramsay shushed. “You’re doing fine. Focus on what I’m doing.” He pumped
his hips. “How does that feel? Good?”
Theon nodded, though it was possible he was just suggestible at the moment. Not
that it mattered. Ramsay didn’t really care if it felt good or not. Theon
wouldn’t remember this in the morning, most likely, just the bruising and
soreness left behind. He’d walk funny for days. Ramsay would be sure to have
Damon mention it in the shower.
He finished messily, then rolled off Theon’s limp form and slipped off and
knotted the condom. As he pulled his pants up, Theon surprised him by sitting
up and throwing an arm over his shoulder. “Don’t leave me.”
“I’ll get in trouble if I’m not back in my room by morning. Is that what you
want? You want me to get in trouble?”
Theon shook his head wildly.
Ramsay gently took hold of his arm, the one he’d injected the ketamine into.
There was only a small purplish bruise there now. Suddenly curious, Ramsay
worked his fingers upwards towards the hand and began to unwind the bandages on
the wrist. Theon squirmed, but Ramsay held tight. There was a nearly-healed cut
underneath, just one, well on its way to making a lovely scar. Ramsay hated the
look of it. How dare Theon do that to himself?
“Why’d you do that?” he asked, suddenly peevish.
Theon whimpered. “I don’t know. I just…nobody likes me.”
“I like you, you idiot.” Ramsay lowered his head and brushed his lips along the
cut. He could feel Theon shuddering under his touch. “Now, get dressed and
don’t ever do anything so stupid again.”
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