Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/544508.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Rape/Non-Con, Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Cabin_Pressure
  Relationship:
      Martin_Crieff/Douglas_Richardson, Hannah_Richardson_&_Douglas_Richardson
  Character:
      Martin_Crieff, Douglas_Richardson, Hannah_Richardson
  Additional Tags:
      Descriptions_of_child_abuse, Descriptions_of_child_rape, Descriptions_of
      bullying, fluffy_too, D/M_pairing_at_the_end
  Stats:
      Published: 2012-10-24 Words: 3558
****** Christmas Wishes ******
by jazzijenni
Summary
     Douglas wishes for the one thing he hasn't got yet, Martin. It takes
     one trip to an Ice rink to see the pain and beauty of Martin on the
     rink, Is it possible that he could be with his Captain?
Notes
     This was a prompt on the CP meme and will try and find the prompt but
     somehow it turned out waaaaay different than I thought!!
     WARNINGS!!!: lots of Martin!whump to the point of child abuse among
     other things so heed the warning if you do not want to read. See
     warnings above too.
     It is supposed to be fluffy too but it turns dark but comes from out
     of the dark and into the light at the end
     This was totally a labour of love (emphasis on labour) so thanks!
See the end of the work for more notes
Douglas was fighting hard for years after his acrimonious divorce to see his
little girl, so it was with great joy and that knowing time was precious with
her that he got to see her around Christmas. Hannah's eyes lit up like the many
decorations around her house when she spotted Douglas's car coming up the
driveway.
"Hello pumpkin!" Douglas greeted his daughter with excitement.
"Hi dad! Did you miss me?" Hannah asked as she hugged him.
"Of course I did! I missed you the day I tried to brighten up your birthday by
sending sweets fluttering down to you and your friends. God knows why she
didn't let me see you for months after that."
"Dad, you turned the sweets into a sugar-bomb. It took out the Karp." Hannah
answered with a wry expression on her face.
"How was I supposed to know they would melt then solidify together again in our
British weather? Anyway, he became a very nice lunch for me and my Captain
friend."
" Ewwww, no dad. Just, no. Where are we going then? And will this 'Captain
friend' of yours be coming along? He sounds really nice and good for you, you
always look a certain way when you mention him. All glowy."
Douglas opened the car door for his daughter. "No. Good heavens, no. What gave
you that idea? I don't even know whether he would be interested or if he is
interested at all in men. He really is not lucky in love. I suppose it doesn't
help being called at a moment's notice to fly around the world."
"It's a shame really. You deserve to be happy dad, especially since the other
tragic wives that you tried to get me to like. Anyway, where are we going?"
"Ah. That is for me to know and for you to find out!" Douglas said with a hint
of glee before he closed the passenger door.
Douglas then got into the driver's side and headed off for the town centre of
Fitton. After ten minutes of driving they were circling Lyle Square, the centre
point of the whole town where gatherings, open air concerts and protests
happen, of which the latter Douglas took part in with regularity during his
wild years at university. He parked up beside one of the statues and got out to
let his daughter out of the passenger side.
"Do you know now what we will be doing Hannah?" Douglas grins.
"Oh, dad! This is a great idea!" Hannah's eyes lit up as soon as she laid eyes
on the huge ice rink in the centre of the Square cleverly wrapped around the
obelisk in the centre dedicated to someone or other. Not many people are on the
rink since adults are still working around the holidays but all the children
from toddlers up into their teens and some adults were skating around with
various degrees of difficulty and skill. Some are also falling on their
backsides, a thing Douglas doesn't want to be doing especially since taking
lessons in the indoor rink 20 miles away for his daughter.
"The thing is dad you don't know how to skate-"
"All taken care of darling. I went to have lessons in Ottery St Mary so I could
have fun with you, instead of sitting on the ice for the time I have with you."
"Oh, dad. Thanks so much!" Hannah beamed. "Let's go and get the rental skates."
"Oh joy. Sharing someone else's smelly, sweaty warm feet in skates that pinch.
I should really buy my own skates if you want to make this a regular thing?"
Douglas questioned.
"Definitely dad!" Hannah said enthusiastically.
"Well, let's go and get these germ ridden skates on." Douglas quipped as they
went inside the makeshift tent.
Once they were both suited and booted, both father and daughter tentatively
walked to the ice rink on the thin, sharp blades. Once they had their footing
on the ice, they took off gradually; left, right, left, right keeping knees
bent, repeating the mantra the teacher taught him.
The rink really was vast. Everyone who was there had a lot of ample space to
jump, twirl, and skate backwards.
What caught Douglas's eye at the other end of the rink was a thin, tall man
with a shock of red hair spilling out the bottom of his woolly hat, tight dark-
but-tatty jeans that he must of had for a long time. It was Martin, but he
looked so different on the ice to what he was in the presence of the MJN
family.
He was graceful, poised, certainly flexible and emotive. Going through
crossovers to build up speed, into a lutz and back down, backward crossovers
into a double axel following into a 1-leg stand with his right straight out
behind him at 90 degrees, out into crossovers again then into a fast spin on
the spot. It was like he was listening to his own music in his head despite the
usual rubbish they pump out at these rinks. It was truly magical to Douglas, oh
sure enough Douglas watched Dancing on Ice occasionally and the winter Olympics
so he knew vaguely about jumps from Robin Cousins, but this looked emotionally
painful too. Douglas thought to himself that this was the only way that
Martin's true self would be shown.
As Martin slowed to a stop, he slowly raised his head and opened his eyes
slowly, as if in a trance and looked around. He spotted Douglas quickly and
with sudden realisation that not only someone, Douglas was watching. His eyes
widened to the size of saucer plates and quickly made his exit. Fortunately for
Douglas he didn't get as far as the entrance gate which was beside the exit so
he could catch Martins arm when he passed.
"Martin-"
"Go away Douglas!" Martin spat.
"Martin, wait! I want to day that was beautiful."
"I don't need your sarcas-, what?"
I said Sir, that what you did was beautiful. It looks like this is one thing
this Sky God is not good at!" Douglas exclaimed jovially.
"W-, w-, w-, well, erm thanks!" Martin stuttered with a smile gradually
appearing and with cheeks getting pinker. He really wasn't used to complements.
"Would Sir like to join me for coffee here?" Douglas said, pointing to the Ice
Rink Cafe on the side with space heaters outside so he can watch Hannah while
she made friends with everyone. Daddy's double that one, can charm anyone even
her dad.
"If you like y-yes." Martin's smile grew wider.
"Well, I'd better tell my daughter I'll be over there."
"N-no Douglas that's alright, I don't want to mess up this day with Hannah. She
already doesn't get to see you enough as it is." Martin said, his face trying
to hide the disappointment.
"Wait. Here." Douglas ordered and skated over to Hannah who was busy takling to
some girls.
"Honey? Do you mind if I take Martin to the Cafe and watch you from there? I
know that it was supposed to be our day, but I need to talk to him."
"Oh! I didn't see him here! Sure dad, on you go. I'm sure you both have a few
things to talk about." Hannah said and winked at Douglas.
"Alright sweetheart." Douglas said with a raised eyebrow. He then skated back
and proceeded to go inside, get his shoes and sit in the cafe whilst thinking
on how to proceed on getting him on a date.
===============================================================================
 
He spotted Martin beside one of the front space heater with two mugs of coffee,
watching others skate. Douglas thought Martin looked as if he was away in a
dreamworld, away in a distant memory and it didn't looks that pleasant. Douglas
managed to snap him out of his dream when he touched him on the shoulder as he
sat down.
"Oh! Hey." Martin smiled toward Douglas.
"I see you got the round in." Douglas smirked at his own choice of words.
"I-it's not Irish coffee I wouldn't-" Martin spluttered.
"I know Martin. Stop getting your boxers in a twist! I trust you. I trust you
more than the engineers at the Flap and Throttle. God knows they've tried after
one too many to 'loosen me up'." Douglas winced at the memory but blushed at
think what Martin might have underneath.
"Oh. Ok." Martin squeaked. Martin seemed to read Douglas and blushed too.
"So, how on earth did you manage to learn to skate like that? You have been
hiding a good talent from me sir!" Douglas asked, taking sip of his coffee.
"Well, I didn't exactly hide it, it's never the weather for skating. I rather
not talk about the how or why." Martin said quietly. Douglas noticed the pained
past look come back on Martin when he walked in earlier. He decided to put the
jibes and mocking on hold, this conversation was delicate he realised. But he
didn't have long to wait as the silence was broken by Martin spilling his heart
out to Douglas.
"I was six when I was aware that my father was abusive." Martin begins slowly.
"I saw it in my mother, when she was moving about clutching her sides, broken
ribs, bruised cheeks and legs, it looked as if it was never ending. Then I hurt
myself outside while I was playing. I came in crying, wanting to be comforted
but my mum wasn't there. My father was and you could tell he'd been drinking.
He hid it well from my mother. I came in and saw the red-bloodshot eyes and I
knew something was very wrong. 'MARTIN! What are you crying for you stupid,
wimpy little git! COME 'ERE and I'll give you something to cry about!' I ran as
fast and as hard as I could but I was only six. I never made it very far, even
with my father drunk. He got me by the back of the shirt and pulled me down the
stairs and dragged me into the living room and onto his lap. He took his belt
off and began whacking my backside with his belt. I started bleeding it was
that bad but I was thankful that my mother came in and disturbed it. I ran
right up to my room and hid in the cupboard. I didn't eat for a while and was
mostly in my room after that. Simon and Caitlin started bullying me about it,
saying I deserved it, it was all my fault, I'm useless, worthless.
"The attacks became worse over the years, from belts, to shoes, to kitchen
utensils and glasses, bottles. He managed to hide them well on my body when he
hit me. My mother came to check and see if I was hurt but she was apathetic.
She was glad that she wasn't the focus of his abuse anymore. Then she did the
worst thing, Left. To start off somewhere new without the kids. It's not as if
I had anyone anyway. I was totally alone. Then a few months after my ninth
birthday, he started sexually abusing me. All I remember is it hurt like hell
and I think I passed out. It happened for a few months after that without
Caitlin and Simon knowing. They were their usual selves but Caitlin was growing
up and she knew there was something wrong.
"I was put into care after that when I went to school next day and started
vomiting because he abused me that morning and used my mouth. I got taken to
the nurse and she was so sweet but I didn't see that at the time. I thought
everyone was out to hurt me and curled into a ball on the nurses table. She
asked what was wrong and I said nothing. She got her stethoscope out and
examined me. She saw the silver scars on my back and a bruise trail. I then
blurted out something that no child should know, "Please don't! Don't fuck me!"
The face on that poor woman was horrific. I thought I was getting into trouble
again and curled up even more. All I remember after that was I was stuck in a
foster home with kids who didn't like me. I went into myself even more. The
lady who took me in was lovely and tried to get me to talk but by that time I
was mute. I didn't want to tell anyone anything, even my counsellor who got mad
because I'd not spoken a word and ended up not seeing me again.
"You know Douglas, I didn't know it at the time but I committed suicide more
than enough times. I jumped out a Victorian second storey window. Mostly I was
trying to get away from the other boys who constantly bullied me. I felt like I
was flying out the window. I suppose that's partly why I love piloting Gerti. I
felt free. I did self harm in adult life, mostly because I failed my CPL so
many times.
"Buuut, I eventually started to talk when I got taken to the ice rink on one of
the many weekend trips my foster mother used to take us on. Apparently I was
quite a natural at it, but the other boys took offence to it because they
weren't getting praised enough so I got pushed and fell. Luckily she saw it and
decided to bring me here on my own. She even got me a female tutor and she
taught me right up to Grade 10. When I was roughly through my mid-Grades, I
eventually said two words to both my foster mother and tutor. 'Thank you'. I
got the same exhilaration from jumping out a window as I did jumping doing
axels and lutzs, but I didn't feel the same. I still wanted to fly. Even though
I was taught and love skating, my passion and drive and my want to become
something more is in flying. I want to show Caitlin and Simon as well as those
boys, even though I am the Captain of a small airdot, I am someone and to spite
my father. He died in prison and because no one else wanted to take his stuff
it all fell on me. I suppose I can thank him for giving me transportation.
"As for brother and sister, Simon never really grew out of his bullying and got
more smarmy as his job is in stocks and shares. I never speak to him. As for
Caitlin, I only recently got in touch with her and we're going slow. She is
really sorry and knew near the end that there was something very wrong and
apologised. She was mortified when I told her. Still, I really did need someone
then.
"After I started talking again, my foster mother got me to a nice counsellor
who listened and helped me immensely, especially with my sexual identity. I
thought that my father turned me gay and I beat myself up for that for a long
time as well as being angry at my father for doing it, but the therapist asked
what I felt for my father and it was hatrid. Which the therapist then told me
that my father had no link to being gay and there was nothing wrong with it.
Although there was trust issues to begin with when I eventually dated. I
suppose I'll never find anyone I'm comfortable with." Martin ended with a quiet
whisper, voice now hoarse.
Douglas was sat there agog for the entire time Martin poured his heart out to
him. He really deeply felt for Martin but had conflicting emotions. The father
in him to protect that vulnerable little nine year old boy, rage to break his
father's neck for even touching Martin and the love and admiration he saw in
his Captain for all that he's been through. Douglas didn't realise he still
hasn't said anything to Martin after his outpouring.
"It's o-ok, I'll go and leave you. I'm sorry." Martin said, standing up, head
bowed like he'd been chastised.
"No! Captain, please sit down." Douglas pleaded. Martin eventually sat down and
looked as if he was waiting for a barrage of insults but nothing came.
"Martin, I- I really don't know what to say. There is so much I want to say to
you, like I wish I could've been there when you were younger to protect you, I
wish I was there to help you through the pain. But I can't take it away an
that's what makes me sad for you, Captain. You are brave, gentle, wouldn't harm
a fly and not as prissy as you seem when see you on board, but I know why now.
You are fantastic, Captain. Please don't forget it." Douglas finished, holding
Martin's hand.
===============================================================================
 
It was bad timing, or good depending on what way you look at it when Hannah
came in and spotted the two close together with her father's hand on Martin's.
"Hey! You've asked him out then?" Hannah said, nodding her head towards Martin.
"Whaa?" Martin's eyebrows hot up and cheeks blushed.
" Great going, Hannah. I was getting to it."
"Well dad, it looks as if you weren't getting there anytime soon."
Hannah then backed away to the coffee bar after her dad gave her a murderous
look.
"What is she talking about Douglas?" Martin queried.
"Well, you see Captain, I have grown rather fond of you of late despite the
teasing but you know the saying 'When a boy teases it's usually 'cause he likes
you' and that's certainly true in my case. I keep on looking round at you
sometimes and see the shiny ginger hair and lovely skin with freckles. Then I
think what would you want with an old Sky God like me?" Douglas smiled
thoughtfully.
"Douglas, I had no idea. I thought you were straight with all the women you
married-"
"Thank you, Captain! But I was more promiscuous in my days and much preferred
men. They haven't tried to sue me for anything yet like my lovely ex-wives."
I still didn't know you felt that way about me. But... I suppose I felt similar
to you too. I-I didn't know whether you batted for the other side, but even
with the jibes you still cared enough and I thank you for that." Martin said
looking into Douglas's eyes.
It was then Douglas looked to the bar and saw the side-eye from Hannah telling
him she wants to go home now.
"Listen Martin, I need to drop off Hannah at her mother's. Do you need a lift
home?"
"Oh, it's alright, I don't want to trouble you-"
"No, it's not any trouble and I wanted to talk to you on the way home, that's
if you want to?"
"O-ok." Martin squeaked.
Soon, they were all out into the cold, climbing into Douglas's Lexus and
dropping off Hannah.
"Thanks dad, I'd love to do this again when you're not so... distracted."
Hannah remarked with a glint in her eye and a grin the Cheshire Cat would be
proud of.
"Sorry darling but see you soon!" Douglas shouted out the window as his
daughter carried on into her house.
The conversation started up soon as he left the driveway of his ex's. "Martin,
I would very much like to explore a different side to our relationship that we
have-"
"What, one where you always win and tease?" Martin quipped.
"Well I would like to win some things." Douglas smiled with a naughty look.
Martin blushed redder than one of the reindeer outside the houses passing by.
"But I know that you may not be ready for certain things and I want to be with
you very much which is why I'm willing to be patient for you."
"Douglas," Martin gasped. "No one has ever thought about what I want and the
fact that you would do this for me is unbelievable . You would really do that
for me?"
"Yes Captain. You really should know I've had the relative 'hots' for you for a
while and you should know that when I really like you I call you 'Captain' most
of the time, like tonight." Douglas again smiled cheekily.
Martin blushed even redder and didn't realise the car had come to a complete
stop outside Park Terrace.
"Would you like to have dinner with me tomorrow night, at mine? I'll cook, I'm
brilliant at that as Arthur would say."
"I-I I suppose that would be ok." Martin smiled still beetroot red.
"Thank you Martin. You've made an old Sky God happy." Douglas smiled at Martin.
"Thanks Douglas, for everything tonight." Martin said. Before Douglas could
respond, Martin leaned over to Douglas and gave him a kiss on the lips. It was
quick but Douglas savoured every second.
Then out of the haze of the kiss he saw Martin standing outside waving into the
car.
"Be ready for Seven tomorrow, I'll pick you up!"
"Ok, thank you Douglas!" Martin shouted. He seemed happier now than he has been
in the past hour Douglas noticed.
Douglas then drove away from Park Terrace thinking on the whole night, the
emotions the kiss and now what to cook whilst thanking the baby Jesus he got
his Christmas wish.
End Notes
     Thanks for reading, and if I have given any facts wrong (I wasn't
     sure about Park Terrace) let me know. Totally un-beta'd.
     Oh, and if anyone wants a little continuation possibly with some
     pr0nz then let me know!
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