Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/13876332.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence, Underage
  Category:
      F/F
  Fandom:
      TWICE_(Band)
  Relationship:
      Chou_Tzuyu/Park_Jisoo_|_Jihyo
  Character:
      Chou_Tzuyu, Park_Jisoo_|_Jihyo, Im_Nayeon, Myoui_Mina, Hirai_Momo,
      Minatozaki_Sana, Kim_Dahyun
  Additional Tags:
      Implied/Referenced_Child_Abuse, Implied/Referenced_Abuse, Implied/
      Referenced_Underage_Sex, Implied/Referenced_Domestic_Violence, Romance,
      Healing, it_turns_out_to_be_softer_than_you_imagined_by_these_previous
      tags, Based_on_a_True_Story
  Stats:
      Published: 2018-03-05 Words: 14303
****** Castillo de Cristal ******
by RaccoonEyedNerd
Summary
     She ran away from home.
     She has a fast car.
     It sounds like it could work.
     So maybe it will.
Notes
     First of all, a very important disclaimer that you shouldn't ignore:
     The events described on this fic are partially based in real stories,
     but that doesn't mean it's a kind of instruction manual on how to run
     away from home or how to deal with certain situations; every
     experience is totally different and it varies depending of so much
     factors. So please, if you're in a critical situation like the ones
     described on this work, reach out to people you can trust, reach out
     for the authorities or any organization that might help.
     Don't forget that there's always someone out there that loves you and
     will care for you unconditionally, even if it doesn't seem like it.
     That said, I hope you enjoy this with an open heart and an open mind.
      
     Playlist, because I love to make all this a multi-sensorial
     experience: https://goo.gl/Kox6La
     My twitter, if you need to talk about everything or nothing, or maybe
     complain about my poor writing decisions: @RaccoonEyedNerd
See the end of the work for more notes
                             Act one: The downfall
 
It was funny, how she used to love her old sneakers; back at home she had three
pairs in two different colors, black and blue, and she would use them
practically everyday because those kind of sneakers matched with all the
clothes she used and the ones her brother gave her were way to big for her to
use until she grew up a bit more -and she refused to carry the heavy load on
her bag anyway-.
 
Those three pairs of sneakers were the first thing she packed before running
away from home.
 
She was in a rush when she started, maybe out of fear of her father waking up
or the night ending excessively soon for her to have time before they noticed.
Her usually calculating hands were suddenly clumsy and she had to try three
times before she finally got a couple hoodies correctly folded inside of her
bag, also picking her best pants out of her old closet and a couple beanies she
found earlier on her brother's bedroom because she would certainly need them if
she were to spend the night in some street out in the cold.
 
She gave her bedroom a last look, trying to remember any other important item
she wasn't ready to leave behind, she saw science fair medals, trophies and
every prize her father decided to ignore, tossed inside of a box; a painful
reminder of the reality she was tossed against when she was brought into the
world. She finally picked a couple notebooks and her favorite pencils, a
present from her childhood friend she refused to use because of the memories
she didn't want to let go, and practically the only good memories she could
recall at the moment.
 
Tzuyu took a deep breath, trying to control herself and hold back the tears
before someone heard her because of the constant thumping inside her chest; she
went for the door, with the intention of searching through the kitchen for some
snack to carry on her adventure or, maybe another knife from her brother's
secret collection under the broken washing machine.
 
But then she wanted to chuckle, that was one of the problems that finally got
her out of that house.
 
Her father barely cooked or shopped for food the last years, so it was unlikely
for her to find anything to eat on the kitchen.
 
She put her forehead against the closed door of her bedroom, trying to find
bravery to take the final first step towards the big world on her own.
 
The young girl ended up kissing the old wood goodbye, a silent farewell to her
old life, her father and her brother; a final and sad reminder of the fact
that, whatever she did, an important part of her -whether good or bad- would be
forever left behind on the house. Falling on one knee, Tzuyu checked her
shoelaces and grabbed her skateboard before standing up and getting out using
the window instead.
 
She gave the house a last longing look before she put the hood over her braided
hair and got on her skateboard, trying to leave the neighborhood behind as fast
as she could and the last memory Zhou Tzuyu left behind on the ironically warm
night was a trail of tears over the cold concrete as she disappeared into the
darkness, with the bittersweet knowledge that probably no one would even make
the effort to find her until it was too late.
 
                                Act two: Storge
 
One of the things Tzuyu was grateful of, was her height, even with seventeen
years old, her mature face and tall complexion made her look older, which was
actually useful while moving around the city in the middle of the night. Police
officers barely sent a glance in her direction, and the families rushing to get
home in her vehicles didn't really mind giving her a lift under the excuse of
taking her back to her dorm because the studying session had went a little bit
too long in the morning.
 
In a couple hours, around seven in the morning, Tzuyu was away enough and
reached the big highway, a metaphor for all the great things, whether good or
bad, were coming her way.
 
Only then, she started to hate her sneakers, because those kind of shoes
definitively were not comfortable enough for long walks by the highway, or so
she figured when she decided to carry her skateboard under her arm, not wanting
to damage the truck and wheels considering the unstable grounds beside the
highway concrete.
 
Step by step she followed the seemingly infinite lines decorating the highway,
walking until she heard the sound of any engine that would help her go beyond
the point she initially had thought. And three hours and a half after she
started walking down the deserted road, and a hole in her sock later, the
familiar sound of a car got to her ears and made her turn around quickly,
pointing her thumb up in hopes to get a lift.
 
The silver Nissan Tucson stopped right beside her, and she pulled her hood back
to look at the two women on the front seats.
 
"Hey, are you okay?" The soft voice of the dark haired woman inquired, concern
all over her face, a logical reaction considering they were practically in the
middle of nowhere.
 
"Yeah, I was just trying to get somewhere." She shrugged, trying to not look
that tired and cold.
 
"Where are you going? We can give you a lift if you'd like." She kindly
offered.
 
"We're going to the National Hospital, we can leave you anyplace in the way if
you want; it might be dangerous for you to be here all alone." The driver
added, smiling so brightly that Tzuyu thought it wasn't entirely normal.
 
However, a ride was a ride, and Tzuyu wasn't really afraid of kidnapping or
death, so she just nodded and the dark haired woman signaled the door in the
back.
 
"I hope you don't mind the little company beside you." The driver commented
when Tzuyu opened the door and saw the baby seat on the middle.
 
She got into the vehicle anyway, sitting beside the little kid and pulling her
bag and skateboard into the vehicle before closing the door carefully. She
rubbed her hands against her jeans to generate some warmth on her hands and get
rid of the dirt and sweat, and nodded to the driver when she asked her if
everything was okay and if she was ready to go.
 
"So, what's your name?" The driver asked, without stopping to look on the empty
road.
 
"Tzuyu." She quickly answered, cringing over herself when she realized her
mistake.
 
"Nice to meet you, Tzuyu; this is Mina here, that little cutie beside you is
Minhee and I'm Nayeon."
 
Tzuyu nodded in acknowledgment but kept quiet, glancing at the sleeping girl on
the baby seat every now and then; the strangers seemed to respect her decision
and didn't really make any kind of commentary for a while. She knew eventually
curiosity would take the best of them and she didn't really blame them, but she
was really wary about the answers she would be willing to give to them.
 
After all, people like them were good at pretending they were interested, then
the concern or indignation was easy to fake; Tzuyu was way ahead of those
things thanks to the experience, and after a couple years and debates with
herself, she decided that try to seek empathy or help from people was a
complete waste of words.
 
She took her time to observe them through the mirrors in the vehicle, and then
the little girl, trying to figure out which one of them was the mother; she
played guess for a while until the soft voice of the other woman interrupted
her childish curiosity.
 
"Are you hungry, Tzuyu?" She turned over the seat to offer a box of grape juice
and a small bag of cookies. "I always bring too much because of Minhee and the
other kid here driving the car."
 
Tzuyu's brain then seemed to go on short circuit, not quite knowing how to
answer to the expectant but surprisingly warm offer the woman had made. The
woman sent a gummy smile on her way, her eyes mysterious but somewhat knowing;
the young girl felt intimidated for a couple instants and all the alarms
started sounding on her head, but Mina just smiled and left both the juice box
and the small bag in the space between the two front seats, no additional
questions, and then she turned around to look at the empty road alongside the
driver, chatting about some movie and their theories about it.
 
She bit her lower lip, glanced at the people in the front, checking if they
were looking at her before discretely taking the snacks, and bring them over
her lap to start eating as quietly as she could before her own stomach betrayed
her and put her on evidence.
 
Then the driver, Nayeon, turned on the radio in a low volume, quiet enough to
not wake up the baby, but loud enough to give some sort of privacy to her while
she ate.
 
They had noticed the clothes and the bruises after all.
 
"Oh, I love this song. Mina, it's the prom song." The driver squeaked happily,
making Tzuyu startle for a bit.
 
"This is the corniest thing I've ever heard in my life."
 
"Come on, you love it."
 
"I'm sorry to break it to you like this, but that's not true."
 
"You still danced to it with me though."
 
"Fair point."
 
Tzuyu heard the exchange with a blank expression on her face, trying to figure
out the context of the random commentaries the two women were making throughout
the ride.
 
But then the little girl beside her woke up, and stared at her like she was
boring holes into her face.
 
"Uhmm..." She mumbled, but the two women didn't hear her, instead she was left
to have a staring contest with a baby who had almost the same neutral
expression as her. "Excuse m-"
 
She was interrupted by a little hand taking a surprisingly strong hold on her
over-sized hoodie sleeve, and the little girl now widely smiling at her with
her head tilting to the side, or well, trying to smile since she didn't had all
of her teeth yet. Tzuyu froze then, not quite sure about how to proceed since
she never had shared such an intense eye contact with a baby like that, but
then the kid glanced towards the bag of cookies on her lap and everything made
sense.
 
In a childish reaction, Tzuyu shook her head, but the kid insisted, staring at
her like she had grew a second head.
 
Eventually, and after a little convincing that included shiny eyes and a cute
giggle, Tzuyu extended one of the cookies to expectant little hands.
 
"Happy now?" She asked, and the girl just giggled again, showing off her two
big front teeth, making her look like a little bunny. For a brief second, Tzuyu
wished her prayers would be audible for whoever created the world, so she could
just wish for Minhee and her family to have a happy life.
 
"Nayeon, Minhee woke up, and she's stealing food from her new friend." Mina
announced after hearing the second giggle.
 
"Hey, baby girl, are you being nice?" Nayeon cooed, Minhee just kept looking at
Tzuyu and smiling with her front teeth dirty thanks to the cookie.
 
"Are you her mom?" Tzuyu found herself asking to Nayeon, initially thinking
Mina was the mother of the child.
 
"We both are." Mina answered.
 
"Oh." Tzuyu said as she looked at Minhee, frowning, and then the two women in
the front seats, and then back to the kid until her brain clicked.
"Ohhhhhhhhhh."
 
Well, now she felt really stupid for not noticing before.
 
The young girl blushed when she realized the implications, and out of pure
shame she put her hood back over her head, looking at Minhee and quietly asking
her why didn't she say anything.
 
The silence came back after a while, and after another hour of driving, they
reached the next city, and the time for her to bid her farewell and go on by
herself.
 
She asked for them to leave her on the local diner, and quietly got off the
vehicle after secretly giving Minhee one of her beanies as a present, which she
gleefully accepted and hugged like it was the most precious thing her tiny
hands had ever held. Her lips twitched on a secret smirk as she closed the back
door and waved Minhee goodbye while Mina and Nayeon got off the car and walked
towards her.
 
Mina handed her a small bag full of snacks.
 
"Take care, okay?" Her knowing eyes smiled alongside her mouth before she lent
forward and softly kissed her cheek, making her flinch before muttering a shy
apology.
 
"Always wear two pairs of socks." Nayeon said, and winked at her. She also took
Tzuyu by surprise then, asking for a hug and sliding something into her hoodie
pocket. She later found out it was enough money for her to eat for at least
five days if she used it smartly.
 
Tzuyu learnt about family then, and how family loved with no questions asked.
 
                               Act three: Agape
 
When her third night away from home came by, Tzuyu found herself again in the
road, riding her skateboard and cursing to herself when she mumbled that stupid
"prom song" she couldn't get out of her head.
 
She found herself humming anyway after a couple minutes.
 
The lights of a near gas station got her attention and it didn't took her more
than a couple minutes to reach the place, looking from afar to avoid any kind
of problems or suspicious strangers; she dusted her jeans and hoodie with the
intention to look less like a homeless girl and more like a simple tourist
taking a long, really long walk through the highway, not quite believable, but
equally convenient in a sense.
 
When she made sure no one but the clerk was in the convenience store by the gas
station, Tzuyu made her entrance and bought both a bottle of water and a ramen
cup, nodding her head to the rhythm of the western song that was playing on the
speakers.
 
"Excuse me, do you, by chance, have a bathroom I could use?" She politely asked
the man after paying for her stuff pulling her hood back so she could look
trust worthy.
 
The man looked at her twice and nodded slowly, signaling the door by the end of
the store.
 
"No funny business, if you take more than eight minutes I'll go in and kick you
out or I'll call the police."
 
Tzuyu just nodded understandingly and left her skateboard with the man, like a
silent guaranty.
 
It was surprisingly clean when she entered and locked the door behind her, so
she quickly took off her hoodie and sneakers, undoing her braids and getting a
new shirt from her bag. She used the sink then, to wash herself as clean as she
could considering the situation, drying herself with the used shirt. The whole
deal didn't took her more than five minutes -somehow even finding time to clean
her hair-, leaving three to spare and do her business before she was
considerably clean, with fresh clothes and ready to go.
 
She even got to wear her blue sneakers.
 
When the young girl went to open the door, scared that the man could barge in
at any minute, she heard another voice in the store. A female voice speaking to
the clerk.
 
She held her breath for an instant, not quite sure about what to do next, what
if she was a police officer? What if she knew about her disappearance? Tzuyu
tried to listen from the other side of the door, but she couldn't make out the
words so she just sighed and prepared herself to go out, retrieve her
skateboard and keep moving until she found another place to spend the night.
 
The young girl opened the door and put her hood over her now loose long hair,
timidly carrying herself to the counter to get her skateboard back.
 
Immediately, two pairs of eyes, one curious and the other indifferent, focused
on her and Tzuyu found it hard to not just run away scared; so she just bowed
respectfully and reached for her board, softly thanking the clerk and ignoring
the woman on purpose until she got out of the store and practically ran to the
parking lot on the side, sitting down and hiding in between two drink expending
machines.
 
She patiently waited until she heard the sound of an engine starting on the
front, but she didn't move; maybe, if she played her cards well, she still
could sneak back into the bathroom and spend the night there.
 
Of course, and like the life she lived before that moment, luck wasn't being
that nice to her.
 
"I know you'd be here." The feminine voice stated confidently, and Tzuyu
jumped, scared when she saw her smile, which immediately made her expression
change. "Whoa, I'm sorry, are you okay?"
 
The young girl stood up and didn't took her eyes away from the woman, her whole
body alert to every movement that might mean a threat to her.  The woman raised
both of her hands in surrender and took two steps back.
 
"Are you a cop?" Tzuyu seriously asked.
 
Unexpectedly, the woman chuckled softly.
 
"No, I'm not." She answered softly, opening her leather jacket and showing the
young girl she didn't carry any badge or gun on her waist. "I just saw you
coming out from the bathroom and I think it was strange for a girl to be alone
here, especially considering the fact that the next town is hours away and the
only car I saw outside besides mine is the truck which, I assume, isn't yours."
 
"So what about it? What do you want?" Tzuyu's voice turned aggressive, and the
unknown woman softened her expression even more.
 
"I just wanted to know if you needed help, if you needed something, anything."
 
"I'm good, you can leave now."
 
"I could lend you a towel for your hair, you'll catch a cold." The woman said,
still taking slow steps back while Tzuyu looked at her. "And I know of a better
place where you could spend the night, a lot better than a bathroom."
 
Tzuyu's eyes started to wander then, looking around and trying to decide what
to do. Every person had become a risk for her, but every person also meant an
opportunity for her to get even more far away from the place she had come from;
she looked at the woman again, her stance and her body frame, she looked
delicate and smaller than her.
 
By logic, the woman was a lot less dangerous than the big guy inside the store.
 
But still, Tzuyu knew better than trusting any adult around.
 
"Where." She asked sharply.
 
"My car." She pointed at the front of the store, towards the old Pontiac parked
there.
 
"You want me to sleep on your car?" Tzuyu scoffed, grabbing her bag close to
her body.
 
"Okay, it sounds stupid and dangerous, I know." She said smiling, but then she
reached behind her, probably her back pocket and took something she showed at
Tzuyu before putting it on the floor and kicking it towards Tzuyu. "That's the
only guarantee I can offer you, and by looking at you, it's the right one."
 
It was a knife, a pocket one but still a knife.
 
"Take it, and come with me. I promise you won't have to use it."
 
"And what makes you think I won't use it against you anyway?" Tzuyu raised her
chin in defiance.
 
The woman just shrugged and turned around a lot more confidently, not even
looking over her shoulder when she replied. Tzuyu slowly and very cautiously
walked behind her from a safe distance.
 
"Because I had a hunch when I looked at you inside the store, you don't look
like the kind that would hurt anyone on purpose."
 
There were at least four meters from where Tzuyu was standing to the place
where the car still was parked, she could feel the look of the other woman from
inside the car, but she couldn't find the bravado to do anything like running
away or walking confidently towards the vehicle.
 
She picked the knife from the floor and held her skateboard close to her chest,
hanging the old bag across her shoulders as she started debating with herself
about what to do.
 
A cool breeze gave her the answer in a shiver that mercilessly took over her
body.
 
Tzuyu might regret her decisions later, but she was also aware of the risks
from the moment she put a foot outside her house, so she walked towards the car
and opened the passenger's door, knife in hand and an strong grasp on her board
and bag.
 
"Where to?" The woman asked when Tzuyu leaned down to look at her.
 
"Far away." She simply answered, entering the car and slowly closing the door,
all that without taking her eyes from the woman, ready for any sudden
movements.
 
"Sounds good to me." She smiled, and started the engine.
 
**
 
Half an hour passed by until the woman spoke again, and a part inside Tzuyu was
actually relieved to hear her talking, it somehow soothed her fears of her
being a total psycho or worse... Something way too familiar to her.
 
"You can leave your things on the backseat if you want, you look uncomfortable.
Also there's a towel for your hair on the blue bag on the back." She offered
without really looking at her. "You probably don't want to know this, but I
think it's the best for you to know about me if we're going to ride together
for a while. My name is Jisoo."
 
Tzuyu didn't answer, instead watched her every movement with furrowed eyebrows,
and like a scared animal would, she cautiously turned to put her things on the
back, opening the blue bag as fast as she could to retrieve the towel; the
young girl didn't fail to notice the rest of the things the woman was carrying
on said bag, but obviously didn't make any comment about it.
 
"Do you mind if I turn on the radio? I feel kind of insecure when it's too
silent but I don't want you to feel uncomfortable either." She asked when Tzuyu
started drying her hair with the towel. The girl just shrugged, silently
wondering when was the last time the woman had took someone she didn't knew for
a ride.
 
Soon the car was filled with the sounds of the guitar intro of the seemingly
foreign song, and a couple instants later, the woman started humming along, her
fingers softly tapping the beat on the steering wheel. Tzuyu could have laughed
if it wasn't for the distrust, but the woman indeed looked like she couldn't
bear the temptation to keep talking to her.
 
In the middle of her train of thoughts, she noticed the highway lights
reflecting on the woman's face and her slightly wavy dark hair, moving thanks
to her rhythmic movements.
 
Tzuyu was a very smart girl, and in that intelligence, she knew she had to keep
quiet and not mention the dark imperfections on her otherwise fair skin; a
flash of bitterness invaded her heart and she had to turn away in order to
ignore the new knowledge about Jisoo. She, after all, understood what kind of
violence was necessary in order to get that specific kind of bruise and the
story behind that violence could only be as somber as her own.
 
Still, the fact didn't make her trust the woman, but it made something inside
her shift... Sympathy, maybe.
 
"I hope you don't mind me talking a little bit, It's been a while since I had a
conversation with someone and the clerk back in the store didn't seem too
enthusiastic to have a chat. Besides, I don't want to fall asleep while
driving, now that would be really unfortunate." She sang a couple lines of the
song that was playing on the background, like it was unavoidable for her to
follow the lyrics.
 
She knew it was Spanish, but Tzuyu couldn't bring herself to understand a
single word of the lyrics, still, the instrumental gave her a slight idea about
the content, and that kept her satisfied for the time being. There was
something oddly calming about Jisoo singing along instead of staying quiet,
maybe she was used to do that in the solitude of her classic car and that made
her wonder about Jisoo's occupation.
 
The grip on the pocket knife started to get loose by every passing minute, as
her eyelids started to get heavy and her body started to demand a proper night
of rest, relaxing her every muscle against the comfortable sit of the classic
car; the younger girl didn't stop listening to Jisoo's voice, even though she
was starting to become a blurry image on the back of Tzuyu's mind, threatening
to run away in order to give space to ambiguous and potentially dangerous
dreams.
 
The woman glanced at her as discretely as she could bring herself to, and then
cleared her throat in order to wake her up without imposing herself over the
girl.
 
"We're stopping by here; It's late for me to keep driving." She explained as
she drove the burgundy Pontiac out of the road and into the deserted landscape
until she found a space safe enough to park the vehicle, barely sending her a
look when she sat up and shook her head in order to keep her consciousness.
"But don't worry; we'll be back in the road before the sun rises completely."
 
**
 
Tzuyu didn't take her eyes off her when she stopped the car and put on the
handbrake, leaving the car shortly after in order to retrieve her bag from the
backseat and toss it into the truck of her car; Tzuyu followed shortly, wanting
to stretch herself a little bit to get rid of the cramps on her muscles.
 
The night wasn't dark, and it was thanks to the lack of contamination in the
air, that let all the stars and the moon shine brightly over the tree line and
the landscape, making the whole scenario look silver; it was quiet, beside the
gentle humming coming from Jisoo, still the same Spanish song, like she was
incapable of get it out of her head. There was, of course a gentle breeze, but
it was a whisper in comparison to all the noise Tzuyu was used to deal with.
 
"Hey." Jisoo called, pulling her once again from her thoughts "Here's a blanket
for you, it's more comfortable than using lot of layers of clothes."
 
She seemed to speak from knowledge, Tzuyu noticed.
 
"I'll sleep on the back seat, so you can take the front one; I thought that it
would make you feel safer that way. But if you want to sleep on the back, it's
your choice." The younger girl raised one of her eyebrows, and Jisoo just
shrugged, throwing the blanket at her and taking her jacket off right after.
 
Tzuyu kept the front door open and tossed the blanket inside, hesitantly taking
her bag from inside and handling it to the older woman so she could stock it
inside the truck so they wouldn't be uncomfortable with the small space inside
the car.
 
Then came the awkward silence again when Tzuyu held a shirt on her hand and
stared blankly at Jisoo, who didn't understood the silent language immediately
and just tilted her head a little bit in confusion until it clicked on her head
and she blushed, turning around. The younger girl blinked twice and shook her
head, taking the hem of her hoodie and pulling it off, followed by her shirt,
this last one making her groan softly.
 
Jisoo kept silent but her brain immediately reacted to the pained sound coming
from the girl, so she peeked out of concern and saw the truth on the younger
girl's skin; she turned around fast after her eyes registered the half naked
complexion of the girl, defined muscles shining under the nightlights and a map
on shades of purple painted on her body. Some of the bruises looked recent, so
she silently opened her blue bag and retrieved an item from it.
 
When the both of them looked ready to sleep, they climbed back on the car,
Jisoo on the back and Tzuyu in the front, reclining the seat so it would be
comfortable but not too much so she let space for the older woman's feet on the
backseat; the younger girl soon got herself comfortable in silence until she
felt a gentle pat on her shoulder. She turned around to find Jisoo holding out
an ointment of sorts.
 
"You won't sleep well if they still hurt." She simply said before laying down
on the back seat and covering herself with the blanket.
 
Tzuyu held the ointment on her hands, looking at the woman who turned around,
ready to sleep; she didn't open it, and just left it on the seat beside her,
covering herself to wait until the woman fell asleep and so she could sleep at
peace. She stared out the window, looking at the stars shining brightly and
even more now that the car lights were off.
 
"It's hard to believe isn't it? How small we are in comparison with the
universe." Jisoo said quietly, the only signal she got of being heard was the
slight movement of Tzuyu's head. "Ancient civilizations said so many things
about the stars, every one of them as wonderful as they were mysterious. I like
the one that talked about the stars making drawings on the night skies, telling
stories about our pasts; if you think about it, it kind of makes sense, because
every time a person starts looking at the stars, they look for memories and
moments that already happened... And still they long for them."
 
The younger girl didn't stop looking at the stars, trying to find those
moments, only to fail and just encounter bright spots covering the sky, dead
stars shining at the longest distances in time and space.
 
"If I focus enough, I hear the stars humming my favorite songs with me." As if
on cue, she started humming the same Spanish song softly, in a more slow and
peaceful tempo. And Tzuyu heard her again, not taking the eyes off the stars
until the woman stopped and she decided to look at her own hands.
 
"What is it about? The song." She found herself asking, and Jisoo kept herself
in the longest silence since the both of them met.
 
"It's about a woman, and her gun." Jisoo answered. "She lets the world judge
her, but she doesn't pay mind to them since she carries her gun with her
everywhere; she has all the power on her hands, but she just let them believe
they have it until she gets tired and picks the most appropriate and dramatic
moment to show she was on top the whole time."
 
"Why would she do that if she could be over all of them if she wanted?" Tzuyu
asked after a brief moment of reflection. "Why take the pain if she's has a gun
to protect herself?"
 
"It's human to try and understand the views of others, I like to think she
wanted to be worth it without having to prove anything to anyone. Being
appreciated without the need of pulling out her gun."
 
Tzuyu hummed in understanding, trying to tie her thoughts around the things
Jisoo said.
 
"You're not lying to me, right?" The younger one asked, making Jisoo sit up
immediately.
 
"Why would I?"
 
"Because I don't understand Spanish, you could be making this whole thing up."
 
"Well, then I have a deal for you if you're interested. I teach you this song
and a little bit of Spanish, if you tell me your name so I don't have to make a
nickname for you." She proposed, and Tzuyu looked at her over her shoulder with
a frown. "It's kind of hard to invent nicknames."
 
"Tzuyu." She sighed, crossing her arms.
 
"Okay so, the song, the first key word you'll learn in order to understand the
song is "pistola" that means gun... "
 
                                Act four: Ludus
 
They surprisingly learnt a lot about each other in that first night, even
though not much questions were made; the important things they found out were
the ones that didn't need a real vocal explanation. Jisoo stuck to her word and
taught Tzuyu her favorite, helping her with the pronunciation until she was
capable of pronouncing the words in an understandable way.
 
Tzuyu found out that Jisoo used to be a photographer, that explained the
several travels she did across the world and the languages she understood, also
the several cameras she carried on the blue bag; she was also a fan of cars,
and that's why she spent most of her savings on the classic Pontiac she drove
on every highway of the country. The older woman was a quite transparent person
about the things she loved and every fact seemed quite obvious when you looked
at her for a while, but the thing that did surprise her were the tattoos
covering her entire left arm from her collarbone to her wrist, the breathtaking
canvas full of soft colors and the most intricate designs of cherry blossoms
and orchids she had ever seen.
 
Jisoo, on her side, deducted that Tzuyu was way more smarter than she initially
thought, her capacity to grasp and learn every new information tossed her way
impressive if compared to her own, being considerably older; since she found
out she was actually underage and skipped several years at school thanks to her
grades, she felt really guilty for peeking at her body when she changed
clothes, but thanks to that impulse, she proved the fact that she used to be an
athlete, and a very accomplished one.
 
Talking got considerably easier the next morning, after they changed clothes
and went on the road again; they spoke about music and Jisoo taught her again
about other songs in many different languages, making Tzuyu grow used to her
company and weird antics every now and then. They drove the whole day, stopping
only to go to the bathroom, eat, or to take photographs of simple things.
 
The sky eventually went from infinite shades of blue to a deep purple as she
night came closer and the next city was still a day away, so they easily agreed
to call it a day and stop by a road store in order to pick something for
dinner.
 
"Do you want me to get something for you?" Jihyo asked as they parked outside
the store and got a gas refill for the car. "I'm getting water, some noodle
cups and a couple batteries for my cameras since we can get all the other stuff
from the city, and a lot cheaper I don't really worry about food."
 
"I don't need anything, I'll just go with you. Is it okay?"
 
"Of course." Jisoo chuckled as she tugged on Tzuyu's plaid shirt sleeve in
order to pull her into the store.
 
This time the clerk was a young girl, who choked on her own drink when she saw
them, like she wasn't used to the presence of other humans. It turned out she
was more used to see old truck drivers instead of young girls in "hot ass
cars", or so she explained to Jisoo when she went over to ask for specific
batteries while Tzuyu went to grab the stuff the older woman named before.
 
Her name was Momo.
 
Jisoo leaned over the counter in order to whisper-ask something to Momo, who
just nodded and pointed to the back of the store when Tzuyu went with their
stuff to the counter in order to pay. The younger girl failed to see the bill
the older girl slipped into Momo's hand.
 
"Hey, I was telling your friend it's the first time in at least three months
that I see females beside my mother in here, and I planned to celebrate it with
a handshake so..." She extended her hand and Tzuyu raised one of her eyebrows
in confusion before letting her stuff on the counter in order to shake her
hand. "I'm Momo, nice to meet you."
 
She laughed at Tzuyu's expression and started putting their stuff in a bag.
 
"I think it's obvious I don't know how to approach a girl anymore, I know, but
it's a pleasant sight anyway so I won't complain about your lack of responses.
It's going to be twenty bucks." She announced and Tzuyu started to count the
money she had left.
 
She bit her lip when she realized she didn't had enough.
 
She looked up to see Momo putting a chocolate bar and a bag of cookies on the
bag, handling it to her and taking only fifteen bucks from her hand awaiting
hand as she sent a wink to her.
 
"B-but..."
 
"It's okay, I know how it's like. And I saw your girlie there looking at the
chocolate so... You'll thank me eventually. Just keep making her smile like
that and the pain will dissapear until there's only happiness to be shared."
 
Tzuyu was taken aback by her sudden sincere words, silently saving her last
five bucks in her jeans pocket, the unexpected kindness from strangers still
being an alien concept for her to completely grasp; she just nodded dumbly and
Momo got around the counter in order to check the gas bomb and Jisoo's car.
 
"What a car... Must be so cool to run down the highway on this one." Momo said
as she patted the car softly, checking the gas level before unhooked the bomb.
Tzuyu just shrugged and turned to see Jisoo leaving the store after them,
another bag on her hands, which she soon stocked into the car's trunk, ignoring
the curious look Tzuyu sent to her.
 
"You can't even imagine." Jisoo answered with a smile.
 
"I'll get to know one day." She said back with a charming smile. "Okay ladies,
my work here is done, you can now go on your way... Please take care and don't
forget to comeback when you pass this highway again."
 
Jisoo shook her hand again and laughed, going around the car in order to get in
and start the engine. Tzuyu sent a single look towards Momo and the girl winked
at her again, cleaning her hands on her pants before giving her a soft pat on
the shoulder as she opened the passenger door.
 
"Just keep taking care of her and she'll keep taking care of you, have a nice
day and don't be afraid of feelings, those are good when you get used to them."
She said before Tzuyu got in and closed the door, waving softly as Jisoo
started the engine and they drove off into the highway again.
 
"She's really something..." Jisoo said with a chuckle after a while.
 
"Yes, she is." Tzuyu replied, looking at the bag on her lap before glancing
through the mirror at the shrinking store they had just left behind.
 
By the time they the night came again, Jisoo proposed lighting a fire and
sleeping outside and Tzuyu agreed because the weather was appropriate enough.
 
After eating and sitting in front of the fire, they both rested on a series of
blankets piled on top of each other, talking about Tzuyu's favorite sports and
the dream of becoming a professional basketball player she gave up in order to
run away and get to know the country... And the world if it was possible. Jisoo
patted her arm and told her that whatever she wanted, she could achieve if she
put enough effort in it, no matter how much it hurt, the pain was made to teach
us humans how to not give up.
 
The younger girl fell asleep as Jisoo sang yet another lullaby for her to have
a peaceful night without another nightmare.
 
And she woke up a couple hours later when she heard her sobbing.
 
As soon as she gained consciousness, she sat up fast and went up to check on a
shirtless and dirty-faced Jisoo, who kept crying while holding a bottle against
her chest, a couple feet away.
 
"What happened?" She kneeled beside Jisoo, checking the woman with her eyes for
injuries of any kind, luckily the fire was still on so she could see.
 
"I dropped the bottle on my shirt and it got wet, Tzuyu." She sobbed, and Tzuyu
noticed the smell of alcohol on her body. She lifted the older woman in her
arms and took her back to the blankets, helping her to sit down and taking the
bottle from her hands. "Please don't look at me."
 
"Drinking isn't the logical response... Alcohol doesn't help on anything at
all." The younger girl said, putting a blanket around Jisoo's shoulders and
sitting beside her in silent support.
 
"I'm not drinking because of the shirt, it's because I need it every now and
then." Jisoo explained, leaning her head on Tzuyu's shoulder and the younger
girl couldn't bring herself to shrug her off. "Go to sleep, I'm sorry for
bothering you, Tzu."
 
"Talk to me... I'm not a good talker, but a decent listener." Tzuyu found
herself saying, the feeling on her heart tugging her close to the woman. She
could say it was a simple act of compassion, but that sole action was so much
more for her; more like the treatment she would have wished to receive when she
was eleven years old and the hell broke loose on the place she used to call
home.
 
Jisoo sobbed again and covered her own face with one of her trembling hands.
 
"I met him when we were fifteen, and we dated since high school years; he was
so... Beautiful, his smile, his kind words and the way he only looked at me and
nobody else, me, the ugly outcast from London with the old-fashioned camera and
the fat body. My parents loved him, his parents loved me even though I was
awkward and not the perfect poster girl, we were the opposite couple, like
those stupid stereotypes you see in movies." She made a pause, tugging on her
own pants in a nervous tick. "I didn't even realize when things started to
change, it was so subtle, how he didn't like when I wore pants so I started to
wear long skirts because he liked them better; he didn't like rock so I started
listening to classical music with him every afternoon... When we got to college
and I decided to major in Photography, he took my camera and said that I was
meant for other stuff, not taking pictures; when I tried to pry my camera from
his hands... That was the first time he hit me."
 
Tzuyu swallowed, and she closed her eyes in order to concentrate and push all
the memories away so she could be there for Jisoo.
 
"He was so sorry, he kissed me over and over again, promised that he wouldn't
do it again... But he did it, over and over again; Kangsoo would ask my why did
I made him do that, and I believed it was all my fault, because he was perfect,
and I was the outcast, the one to blame."
 
She trembled, and Tzuyu just kept listening to her.
 
"I dropped out from college out of fear... And I was so scared of my parents
that I didn't let them know and I just saved all the college money in an
account to give it back to them eventually. That was the last straw, when I
told Kangsoo I would come back home to my parents; that night he brought a
bottle of wine because he was planning to propose. He used the bottle to..."
 
"That's why you have these tattoos." Tzuyu cut her off, trying to not make her
go back to that moment and the fact that she didn’t felt brave enough to keep
listening. Jisoo just nodded and held tightly onto the blanket so the younger
girl wouldn't look to her body. "I know too well how it is to be scared every
day."
 
"I grew up thinking he was the only one who could ever love me like that."
 
"I grew up thinking no one could ever be capable of loving me at all." Tzuyu
replied, leaning her head on top of Jisoo's. "My father and brother... They-
" nausea shook her body as she tried to keep her indifferent facade; soon the
bottle on her hand flew away as she threw it as far as she could and she
sniffed in frustration.
 
"Tzuyu... When I met you-"
 
"I'm still running away, it's my fourth night away."
 
"What if they look for you?"
 
"That's the difference between you and me, they won't look for me."
 
She felt the woman shift then, and she felt her eyes boring into her side
profile like it was the first time she saw her; Tzuyu could say the same about
Jisoo; she now saw the woman in an entire new light, not because she was a
victim, but because she was doing the same exact thing Tzuyu tried to do in
that conversation: trying to give another person the chance she didn't got,
that was the reason she picked her up from a potentially dangerous store, and
that was why the younger girl let herself be hugged by the older one.
 
Tzuyu gently kissed Jisoo's temple and the both of them sobbed, sticking to
each other until they were too tired of crying and fell asleep tangled under
the blankets on the warm ground.
 
When the sun shined upon her faces, two broken hearts, two broken bodies and
two deeply wounded minds stared at each other through hooded, swollen eyes;
they hoped for the first time in a long time, for their rough edges to be soft
enough for them to stick close and maybe make a new shape out of irregular
pieces.
 
                               Act five: Pragma
 
The next city seemed more like a carbon copy of the previous ones, and that
somehow made Tzuyu wish for them to go beyond until they discovered new
landscapes and fresher airs; Jisoo kept her calm, promising for a sole and
quick shopping stop in order to sooth her inner anxieties, the younger girl
found herself sighing softly every time she heard the words.
 
Lately, the only thing that made her feel alive was the prospect of running
away again and again, until the world completely forgot her name and everything
she carried within was tossed off the edges of the world.
 
"It's mainly water and some snacks for the way, and if I'm lucky, probably some
film for my camera; we can get the food on road diners and convenience stores
if we keep on the route. We have to make a stop on a hostel too, so we can take
shower because in all honesty I need a very long shower to cleanse all my
sins." Jisoo jokingly explained as Tzuyu walked close beside her. "Does a bed
for the night sound good to you?"
 
"I don't care." She simply answered, and she was honest.
 
"Of course you don't." Jisoo sighed as her usual smile faltered, a sad glint on
her big and expressive eyes.
 
They walked in silence across streets and looking through stores for anything
they could need until the next stop; little by little, the bag Tzuyu offered to
carry was filled with the essentials, including a toothbrush and other
necessities Jisoo bought for her, insisting that the ones she brought with
herself were already too old or unusable.
 
Tzuyu tried hard to convince herself that the older woman wasn't caring for
her, that the emotion that flashed on her face wasn't genuine and she was only
waiting for the perfect moment when she could be hurt once again; it was hard
every time, because each time the taller girl muttered a "thanks", Jisoo's
smile seemed to get even brighter, followed by a soft "it's nothing" before she
walked a couple steps away in order to retrieve yet another thing she said they
needed.
 
It was hard not to believe in her, they were the same after all.
 
"Is there something that you'd like, Tzuyu?" She asked when they entered yet
another store, walking through the aisles in search for her favorite snacks.
When she, unsurprisingly didn't got any answer, she stopped on her tracks and
looked up at her. "Okay let's do something, go and search around the aisles by
yourself; I won't be looking at you, so just pick whatever you want and meet me
here in a couple minutes, okay?"
 
Tzuyu put both of her hands inside her hoodie pocket and timidly nodded before
walking away taking long strides, not wanting to keep her waiting too long.
 
It was more difficult than she initially thought.
 
She looked through colorful packages and different sizes of snacks, each one
looking more tempting than the previous ones; the shop got Tzuyu into a
predicament when she stood on one of the aisles, holding a bag of mini-brownies
on one hand and gummy bears in the other, looking from one to another while
biting her lower lip in concentration.
 
She had never tried any of those before.
 
Tzuyu wondered if Jisoo would get mad if she asked for the two bags, they
weren't so expensive and she could probably trade them for the bottle of lemon
ice tea Jihyo picked for her.
 
"Jisoo? Is it you?"
 
The deep voice calling that particular name from the other side of the aisle
immediately pulled Tzuyu out of her thoughts and triggered her curiosity; she
walked around the corner to go and look for the older woman, discreetly peeking
when she found her, her face looking directly to the chips section of the
aisle, like she was pretending to ignore the person who called her name. The
tall girl then decided to walk out from the corner and clear her throat to get
Jisoo's attention from whatever was going on.
 
"Hey... Uhm, would you mind i-"
 
"Oh my god, it is you." The tall man chuckled, interrupting her, and Tzuyu's
expression immediately morphed from curiosity to nothing when the older woman
flinched and dropped her lemon tea bottle.
 
"Kangsoo..." Tzuyu heard, and her blood froze when she saw the man walk towards
Jisoo and enveloped her in a hug.
 
The first thing her brain processed was the panicked look on the older woman's
face when the man entered her personal space right in front of her, holding her
face in his hands to keep her close while he talked.
 
"Oh my god, baby, I missed you so much." He almost cried out, his eyes becoming
crescent moons as he smiled sweetly, like he couldn't believe she was really
there. He touched her face, his thumbs caressing her bruises and making her
shiver. "I looked for you, so long... I can't believe I found you here, how are
you? are you okay? where are you staying?"
 
The tall and well-built men looked so nice, so kind and polite; his buttoned up
shirt tucked into his pants giving him the suburban husband look that would
make any girl fall for him and his innocent looking doe eyes. But she only
could see danger in people like him, the ones who looked more brilliant were
the same ones who casted the biggest shadow.
 
Tzuyu felt nauseous when he started caressing Jisoo, kissing her forehead over
and over again, whispering sweet nothings and practically crying in joy. She
was reminded of the things she tried so hard to push to the back of her mind
when she saw Jisoo's face, the scars under her skin itching to be opened again
when those big eyes only reflected pain and fear; with her hands trembling and
sealed lips, she held the candie bags with a death grip until her own eyes
found the stranger ones, giving her a curious look.
 
"Oh, are you Jisoo's friend?" He smiled widely and Tzuyu never felt more
disgusted when he held out his hand. "Nice to meet you, I'm Kangsoo, Jisoo's
boyfriend."
 
She felt lightheaded when the man reached out and held her hand anyway, shaking
it softly.
 
"This is... This is Sally." Jisoo squeaked out, immediately taking the
attention of the man back to her. "She's shy."
 
"Oh, don't worry." He softly said, smiling back at Tzuyu, who could only hear
venom dripping from his words. "She looks like a sweet girl."
 
"Kangsoo-" She interrupted again in the softest voice the younger girl ever
heard coming from her, tugging on his sleeve. "Can we talk?"
 
"Of course, baby, we have a lot to catch up with."
 
"I mean, right now... Can we talk outside? Tzuyu can wait for us on my car."
Jisoo sent a quick glance on her way and gave her bag, but the taller girl
didn't move so instead she tugged on Kangsoo's sleeve again, pulling the
smiling man towards the exit. "She will pay for her things and meet us
outside."
 
"Okay, we will wait for you around the corner, Sally-ssi." He politely
announced.
 
"Take your time, you can buy anything you want." Was the last thing Jisoo said
to her before getting out of the store in company of the man.
 
And Tzuyu just stood there, knowing exactly what she meant by that.
 
She heard her father saying similar words to her brother so many times, like a
silent warning about what was going to come; her fate sealed by the privacy of
their living room, or her bedroom for that matter. So many times she chose
silence and obedience, so many times her brother chose ignorance and even more
violence in a futile attempt to present himself as the untouchable one.
 
So many choices went wrong so many times.
 
But for the first time in her life, Tzuyu felt she had a real choice, right on
her hands. The choice was right on her fists, closing strongly as her own short
nails pierced through the skin of her palms. It didn't felt like the movies,
when the protagonist, fueled by revenge, starts seeing red as the anger and
rage takes over their whole existence.
 
Tzuyu didn't see anything at all, she just felt the pain inside her ribs and
inside her throat, consuming her all as she dropped the candy bags and put
Jisoo's bag over her shoulder; she swallowed the hot melting iron inside her
lungs and her long legs moved faster as her vision turned into a tunnel,
closing in on her as she suffocated herself with hate.
 
Her skin barely registered the light rain dropping on her shoulders, sticking
strands of hair against her corrupted expression, she ignored every voice
around her, every sound filling the atmosphere as she only focused on an
specific male voice, dripping poison on the alleyway on the side of the parking
lot. Her heart started beating faster when she found them.
 
And it stopped completely when Kangsoo's hand collided with Jisoo's beautiful
face.
 
"See what you made me do? I only want to help you... But you're so stubborn.
Why do you make me hurt you?" He sweetly said, grabbing her by the shoulders
and kissing the other side of her face, not even bothering to clean the thin
trail of blood running down her chin. "Don't make me do it again, look at me,
Jisoo."
 
That wasn't love, Tzuyu was sure of it; she had met love from the first day
away from home. She met love in a silver Tucson; she met love in a convenience
store, in the middle of the night; she met love when she was twelve years old
and got her first kiss.
 
"Jisoo, look at me right now!" He roared, making the older woman shrink into
herself.
 
That wasn't love, back at home there wasn't love... In that alleyway, there
wasn't love.
 
The rain roared as she did, dropping the bag in the wet concrete and grabbing
the snake with her two bare hands, running towards him as a black horse would
in seek of freedom; her thin frame collided with the muscular one of the man
and suddenly everything was white noise and the world was devoid of color. In
the monochromatic scene, Tzuyu didn't see red, she saw black and white as she
threw herself on top of him when he lost his balance and fell to the floor.
 
Tears filled her eyes but no one saw them, she didn't let them; she roared back
at his surprised expression when she grabbed him from the shirt collar and her
fist collided like a brick against his face, over and over again as the iron
went through every artery, through every vein to find its place on her heart
and providing her the strength to face the devil himself and take him with her
back to hell.
 
Jisoo's voice begging her to stop was the only thing that tied her to the
world, as the pathetic demon under her fought back and drew blood from her nose
and mouth; there wasn't anything nor anyone who could stop her from counting
every bruise on Jisoo's skin, every tear falling from her face and turning it
into a punch or kick against the man's frame. She clawed, punched and kicked
until the only thing she could feel was the vibration of his pathetic whines
and the soft arms of Jisoo circling her waist and making an effort to pull her
away from him.
 
"Tzuyu STOP!" She screamed until her voice blended with the sound of the police
sirens closing in.
 
The monochrome world only then shifted into two colors, red and blue, as her
blood covered hands met the blue steel from the police car and two pairs of
hands pulled her away from Jisoo's embrace.
 
"Jisoo..." She called out weakly as she stared at the woman's blood stained
expression of pain, even worse than the one after being hit by Kangsoo.
 
Everything blurred into nothing as she saw her trying to stand up and run after
her.
 
**
 
"Where is she! I want to see her! Let me the fuck out of this place!"
 
She banged her fists hard against the bars, pushing her body against them in a
futile attempt to escape the cell, the woman from the other side just gives her
a concerned look but ignores her anyway while she fills up a form. Tears roll
down her cheeks in frustration because she can't bring herself to be calm
considering the fact that she doesn't know if Jisoo is okay; for the first time
in a long time, Tzuyu was scared of the posibility of other person being hurt.
 
"I'm supposed to be with her, we have to get to the next city to see the
sunset." Her forehead met the iron bars and she sobbed, getting the attention
of the police officer filling the form. "I want to be with her, this place is
too small."
 
"This would be over faster if you just talked to us about what happened." The
pale officer said knowingly and shook her head when Tzuyu spitted at her foot
and hit the cell bars again using her fists. "Real mature kiddo, but you're in
big trouble, you almost killed that dude. How old are you, by the way?"
 
But she kept silent, earning a disapproving look from the young, pale officer;
she stood up from her desk and sighed, pulling a chair with her in order to sit
in front of Tzuyu's cell, taking off the service gun from its holster and
letting it rest on her thigh, awaiting for every wrong or sudden move. She
seemed to examinate her expression while she sat there, until she apparently
found what she was looking for and pulled the magazine out of the gun, leaving
both elements on top of her desk.
 
"I'm Officer Kim Dahyun." She started, looking at her own nails before boring
her feline eyes into her own. "And I know you're no gangster, kid, I can tell
and your fingerprints are not present in any kind of criminal record; what you
did to that man though, never saw anything like that in this sad, small town.
I'm intrigued about the reasons, because I have a couple witnesses that told me
really interesting things that I need to confirm before we decide what to do
with you."
 
"Jisoo."
 
"The woman?" The officer asked, raising one of her eyebrows and leaning forward
as Tzuyu expression changed at the sole mention of the other female.
 
"Let me see her." Tzuyu insisted, her voice echoing in the space of the old and
small police station.
 
The police officer sighed, running her hands through her hair.
 
"You're not helping."
 
"Jisoo."
 
"Do you even understand why do I need you to talk?"
 
"Jisoo." She repeated like it was the only word she knew, pressing her face
between the bars to intimidate the officer, who simply stood out and looked
closely at her face.
 
"Those are older bruises." She mentioned before taking steps back and picked up
her radio; Tzuyu didn't register her words as she grew even more desperate as
the seconds inside that cage went by.
 
After a couple minutes, another officer entered the station from the back door
and stood beside Officer Kim, staring at Tzuyu as she whispered something into
her partner's ear. The young girl didn't see the change in their expressions,
only heard the single sigh and the chair moving again.
 
"She won't say anything unless... "
 
"Okay then, let's take her to the back and be over with this." Officer Kim said
to the other one. "Okay kid, let's move; hands on your back and don't you dare
move until your handcuffed again."
 
The metal pieces again circled around her wrists and pressed into her skin as
she was pulled out of the cell and into the back door, an eerie looking hallway
giving space to even more suspicious offices with no indications; Tzuyu's eyes
blurred thanks to the tears and she suddenly looked like the child she really
was, scared of the future and what the world prepared for people like Jisoo and
her.
 
The innocent looking officer opened one of the doors for them and led them into
something that looked very much like an interrogation room. They asked for her
to sit down on one of the chairs, but Tzuyu was restless, her knees shaking and
her breath fastening as she stood beside pale officer when the other one walked
out the door.
 
"Tzuyu?"
 
All of her senses went on full focus then and her heart skipped a couple beats
when the other officer opened the door and revealed Jisoo, who slowly and very
cautiously entered the room; her face was again bruised and her lower lip had a
cut, but all Tzuyu saw were her big eyes looking at her like she didn't know
what to do anymore. A metallic sound echoed on the room as one of the officers
freed her from the handcuffs and she immediately took a step towards the older
woman, her hands hovering over her face but not quite touching until Jisoo
leaned on one of her still blood stained hands and started crying, clinging
onto Tzuyu like her life depended on it.
 
"Will you talk now?" Officer Kim interrupted, her look softening considerably
after glancing towards her partner. "I assume your name is Tzuyu, since...
Jisoo here just confirmed it. Is it okay if we call you Tzuyu?"
 
The younger girl nodded, holding onto Jisoo, who hid her face on her neck the
whole time, even when they agreed to sit down on the chairs the officers
prepared.
 
"Okay, so, officer Minatozaki here and I are going to make you some questions,
and it's really important of you to be completely honest with us... We have
several witnesses, and if the information you give us doesn't match with what
the people said I won't have a choice but to send you to jail, Miss Tzuyu."
 
"What you did there was brutal, and you could be imprisoned by homicide attempt
if that man presses charges." Officer Minatozaki added in a way more concerned
tone than Officer Kim.
 
"I need you to describe, specifically, every happening since the beginning."
Officer Kim prompted. "And don't omit any details."
 
By the moment they were done -Or more like, Tzuyu was done, since Jisoo didn't
dare to speak directly to them or even leave her hiding spot at Tzuyu's neck.-
both officers exchanged looks and looked into the files with unreadable
expressions.
 
Officer Minatozaki shared a warm and reassuring smile with them and got up from
her chair in order to retrieve a bag from behind her and and kneel in front of
Tzuyu while putting latex gloves over her hands, politely asking her for her
hand and extracting some of the blood under her nails and saving it onto a bag
that read "evidence"
 
"What do you think about this, Dahyun?" Minatozaki asked, checking for the
evidence bags to be properly sealed. "It certainly sounds like self-defense to
me."
 
Tzuyu frowned and Jisoo peeked from her neck.
 
"It does, considering the facts... That she didn't hit first and certainly
didn't opposed to be arrested, also, she shows minor self-defense injuries."
 
"It would be perfect if we were to confirm that he had previous violent
behaviors... If we had the evidence." Minatozaki added, nodding towards the
blood sample she got from Tzuyu's hands and another one she got from Jisoo's
face. "We still would need to fill the reports... Under their names though."
 
"Yes... Their names." Dahyun repeated, raising both of her eyebrows to the two
confused faces and signaling the door.
 
When the burgundy '65 Pontiac sped off from the police station, both officers
stepped out and saw the car driving away with the same unreadable expression on
their faces.
 
"Did you call the hospital?" Officer Minatozaki asked.
 
"Yes, Sana, they have him locked up on his hospital room; he seems to have
previous records, both rape attempt and extremely violent behaviors." Dahyun
clicked her tongue, disgusted with the taste those words left on her mouth.
 
"Why did you let them go?"
 
"Because the paperwork for a trial it's way too stressful, and they might have
to repeat the same story over and over again... And it would be really tiring
for me to write it in reports over and over again." She pretended to be
stressed and tired, fake-cleaning the sweat off her brow.
 
"You could get in trouble, the taller one had bruises all over her body when we
arrested her, and they were definitively a week old or so."
 
"We became police officers because we wanted justice, not technical
formalities... And those girls, they were both exposed to the worst kind of
humans; some people only understand violence, Sana." Dahyun answered,
intertwining her fingers with Sana's.
 
"Not them though."
 
"Not them, they speak a completely different language."
 
                          Act six: Eros and Philautia
 
The hours went by as fast as they came, the car speeding through highways and
empty streets as Jisoo craved to get away as fast as possible, from everything
and everyone. They kept silent as the semi-deserted landscape soon started
morphing into forests and went from yellows and oranges to greens and blues.
 
For full five hours, they didn't let go of each other's hands.
 
When they stopped the car in a ground road, apparently secluded from the world,
Tzuyu followed Jisoo through trees while carrying her blue bag and a single
blanket; something huge was growing inside her veins, something full of longing
and unafraid of whatever the fate prepared for them. She followed the older
woman in seek of the sound making itself even more loudly at every step they
took.
 
And not once did Jisoo let go of her hand.
 
Tzuyu's blue sneakers left her feet and the blue bag was left forgotten on top
of the blanket as she walked into the lake after Jisoo, shuddering at the
contrasting feeling of the sun on her skin and the cold but considerably calm
waters covering her up to the hips. She stood in front of Jisoo and stared at
her still blood stained face, the same way she stared at her own, like looking
for a trace of doubt on her eyes.
 
She let go of her hand when she found her answer, reaching to the back of her
jeans and retrieving a pair scissors, showing them to Tzuyu.
 
"You came for me."
 
"And I would do it over and over again." She answered instantly, catching
Jisoo's tears on her thumb.
 
"You became the minute of quiet in this loud shouting world, even when your
heart itself is so full of noise and cries of pain."
 
"But you heard them, you heard me." She whispered, receiving the scissors Jisoo
put on her hand and watching attentively as she held her hair in front of her,
as a tribute. "Because you sound like the songs you hum while I'm sleeping."
Tzuyu reminded her, cutting every strand of Jisoo's hair, running her fingers
through it to get rid of every trace of Kangsoo's presence and branding her own
in hopes of her to forget.
 
She helped her until her hair was shoulder-length and she cleaned her face with
the uttermost care using the lake water, running her fingers over the skin and
purifying it with devotion. She smiled at her when Jisoo opened her eyes and
looked up at her, silently asking how did she look.
 
"And you look like the home I always imagined." The younger girl finished,
handling the scissors to Jisoo and guiding her hand until she let her know how
short she expected it to get.
 
Jisoo's big and bright eyes looked up at her with uncertainty, silently asking
Tzuyu if she was completely sure about what she was about to do; the taller
girl answered by kneeling in front of her until the water leveled up to her
chest, closing her eyes in the greatest sign of trust and guiding again the
scissors on her hair.
 
"Help me get rid of the pain." She whispered, holding onto Jisoo's hips as the
long strands of hair started falling into the water and the weight put over her
shoulders at such a young age started to fade away into the lake.
 
Every scream and every hit, every bruise and every scar faded into nothingness
when Jisoo ran her hands through her hair, cutting the most part of it with
trembling hands; suddenly the world felt less scary, because not all people
wanted to keep her in the proverbial cage she was tossed into when she was
born.
 
She met love through the people she less would have expected; she met love when
she met Nayeon and Mina, taking their sick daughter to the hospital with the
most bright smiles Tzuyu had ever seen in a family; she met love when Momo
gifted her wisdom and the most humble of presents in exchange of a smile or a
single shake of hands, the love for those we can make smile; she met love when
Kim and Minatozaki gave them freedom, even over the risks it would really mean
for them, because they believed in true and everlasting justice.
 
She met love in a single glance, when a stranger looked for her in an empty
parking lot, offering comfort and healing in more than one way, even if her own
heart was already suffering.
 
And when she opened her eyes to see Jisoo once again, she met love all over
again.
 
The older woman ran her fingers through the now short hair, the boyish haircut
not affecting the soft features of her young, beautiful face. Tzuyu's fingers
grasped Jisoo's hips for support as she slowly stood up, softly taking the
scissors from her hand and carelessly throwing them to the lakeside; she took
her hands then, and brought them to the sides of her face, craving for the
delicacy of her touch to bring comfort one more time as she realized the nature
of the feelings invading her being.
 
Jisoo noticed the change on the taller girl's eyes, the brilliant pupils, full
of unanswered questions and inexperience; she held the younger girl on her
hands and silently promised to keep her heart as pure as she was seeing it at
the moment, raw and full of the most overwhelming feelings.
 
"Do you understand how dangerous is for you to look at me like that... You're
so young, and I don't want to be another weight on your shoulders." She voiced
out her doubts, but she didn't dare to take her fingers away from Tzuyu's
delicate skin. "What can a broken castle of glass do to protect you from the
rain?"
 
"You look at me like that and expect me not to catch feelings, you're unfair,
Jisoo." Tzuyu stubbornly answered, letting out a soft chuckle and resting her
hands on her waist. "You forget that broken pieces of glass can make the light
reflect in an even more beautiful way, there is beauty in the chaos, you know?
We can be sharper, wiser; just let me in, Jisoo, and I promise you I will love
you until love doesn't hurt anymore."
 
Tzuyu's nose caressed her cheek as she pulled her close, brushing her lips
against her own in order to ask for permission, the sound of their breathings
being the sole accompaniment to the faint sound of the water moving around
them; the younger girl's inexperience and curiosity met her vulnerability at
the first moment their lips met in the most innocent of kisses. Jisoo sighed in
the middle of it, her heart bursting with emotion at the purity of the contact,
a blank canvas suddenly filled with colors and the most beautiful shapes.
 
Hesitant hands found the buttons of her shirt and Jisoo guided each one of her
movements, letting herself be undressed slowly by the taller girl's curious
hands. Only then their lips stopped their motions and Tzuyu took a step back in
order to admire the new world being unveiled in front of her eyes; the navy
blue shirt hanged from the older girl, exposing the colorful flowers starting
from one of her shoulders and getting lost down her left arm, and the clothed
chest to her now eager eyes.
 
She slid her hands from her shoulders down her arms, helping her to get rid of
the soaked piece of clothing and discarding it out of the water in order to
take care of the next piece of clothing covering the wonders of the art piece
that Jisoo really was.
 
"Do you want me to stop?" Tzuyu softly asked, her fingers sliding down her
waist.
 
Jisoo answered by pulling off her hoodie and t-shirt, leaving Tzuyu completely
bare from the waist up and, like it was an immediate magnetism, latching her
lips on her skin. The younger girl sighed as every bruise on her torso was
gently kissed, her fingers tangling themselves on her hair as she ran her lips
across the burn scars and traced every bruise like it was the most beautiful
thing she had ever seen.
 
She pulled her closer and the both of their breaths got caught on their throats
as their warm skins came in contact with each other; Tzuyu kissed her again
because she found the sweetest of caramels resting on her lips and was eager to
taste more, her clumsy hands getting rid of the last piece of clothing covering
her chest.
 
When they carried their bodies out of the water and fell on top of the blanket
completely bare for the sky to see, Tzuyu looked down at Jisoo with a last
question lingering on her dark eyes; her fingers trembling as she supported
herself in one arm in order to keep touching her everywhere, anywhere.
 
“It’s okay; we don’t have to do anything else.” She whispered, her hands
finding the nape of her neck and bringing her closer in order to kiss her
again.
 
Still, she was so eager to keep discovering her, to keep loving her until all
her insecurities melted into nothing. She kissed the bruise under her eye and
the one on her jaw, sighing at the feeling of her hands running down her back,
trying to soothe her childish fears. Tzuyu let her hand roam, discovering new
sensations and reactions; different sounds and sweet kisses guiding her
movements in harmony with their unsteady breathings.
 
The need of more pushed her to try even more things, and she let her instincts
guide her as their skins blushed and reacted at every trace their digits left
behind; her fingers then reached the heart of her femininity at the same time
that Jisoo’s leg found a place between her own and their hearts stuttered at
the new discovery.
 
Most people would use the expression “the hell broke loose” to describe a
moment like the one happening at the moment; but as their moans merged into
one, echoing in the woods, it was more like the heaven had found its place on
the earth in order to join them and declare their love as holy.
 
The young girl found herself determined to erase every trace left behind by the
devil, replace every bruise with her kisses, every scar with her warmth until
everything Kangsoo had done was as insignificant as his own presence in the
world.
 
Tzuyu’s fingers helped her to create a new world to unveil, remembering every
millimeter of skin and flesh as she delicately stroked her open; her lips
lingered over Jisoo’s and their breaths became a single one as their lungs
synchronized. It was experimental at first; a subtle movement of her hips and
the temptation covering her fingers helping her realize the power she was
taking from the world, claiming its most beautiful angel as her own.
 
Her own hips showed her the way to feel a completely new kind of human
connection, and Jisoo’s hands guided their movement like it was a dance; the
burning sensation in her body made her easily crave for more, but it wasn’t the
sole action affecting her, it was the look she gave her when she opened her
eyes.
 
Everything around them meant nothing, the only thing in existence was them and
the love they proved to each other from the first time they crossed paths.
Tzuyu shivered when Jisoo traced her chest with her fingers, encouraging her to
keep going and deliver herself completely at the new sensations, soaking her
thigh in pleasure.
 
“Deeper.” Jisoo asked breathless, and Tzuyu complied, earning a new moan.
 
Every stroke and every move suddenly got caught in a rhythm, just like when she
hummed those Spanish songs at night, only this time it was a totally different
kind of music the one they were following. Tzuyu moved her lips to Jisoo’s left
shoulder, kissing, nipping and licking at her tattoos and the big scar hidden
underneath; she warmed her skin with her own breath, slowly becoming unsteady
as her own motions became frantic.
 
The burning was overwhelming, and she was sure Jisoo was feeling it too when
her moans became helpless whines and her nails trailed down her back, trying to
not damage the skin but incapable of resisting.
 
“How does it feel?” She breathed out, holding out a moan as the older woman
shifted her thigh, adding pressure to her center; Jisoo ran her fingers through
her short hair, bringing her closer to answer because she didn’t even trust her
own voice anymore.
 
“It’s… So bright.” Jisoo replied, her legs trembling when Tzuyu’s fingers found
a specific spot in her canal. “There”
 
Tzuyu’s bottom lip trembled at the discovery and she stroked repeatedly until
Jisoo’s shoulder length hair laid messily on the blanket and her mouth opened
without making any sound; she felt her insides fluttering around her fingers,
her heels pressing strongly against the ground and somehow, the younger girl
knew.
 
“Jisoo…” She called with a breathy voice, making sure the other girl heard her.
“You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever witnessed. Let me make you not only
mine, but yours.”
 
Jisoo pushed herself against her as if she would die if she didn’t, and Tzuyu
of course was there to make sure she didn’t, holding her in her arms when her
back arched and her mouth let out the most beautiful sounds she ever heard,
flesh walls keeping her fingers greedily as she came undone under her, filling
her hand with the result of her caresses.
 
Her own sanity followed right after, her craving causing her hips to move in
slow but firm circles on Jisoo’s thigh; her chest heaving as the older woman
holds her behind firmly in order to make the contact harder on her. Tzuyu
barely registered her own needy whines, too deep into the sensations provided
by the woman under her, hands trailing down her body like she was worshipping
her.
 
The feeling she got was something she could never forget, her body trembling as
she lost grasp of her own consciousness and she melted on top of Jisoo, holding
onto her while her hips twitched and the wet sounds were rudely loud in the
middle of the woods. Overwhelmed tears ran down her cheeks and the older woman
stopped them with more kisses, finally shuddering when her insides dripped on
Jisoo’s skin, leaving a piece of her in her painted skin.
 
They stared at each other like the night Jisoo got drunk, through hooded eyes
filled with a completely new feeling, only this time they already know what
specific feeling it was.
 
Tzuyu gifted Jisoo with the most beautiful smile she had ever seen, and the
first one she had actually seen coming from the teenage girl; she brought her
hand against her lips and kissed the skin there with the most pure devotion she
could evoke.
 
“I love you… Jisoo unnie” She whispered on her shoulder, cuddling next to her
as the sun shone on them. “I love you because I love myself when I do so.”
 
Jisoo could have cried in the moment she heard the girl say that, because it
was the same exact feeling she wasn’t able to describe, even being older and
more experienced in life. Tzuyu somehow kept her innocence, and Jisoo was
proven that even making love can’t take away all the good things inside her
heart, even when her body had been previously tainted.
 
“I love you too, Tzuyu. So much.”
 
**
 
“Name one place you always wanted to see.” Jisoo smiled at her, playing with
her short hair after Tzuyu finished putting on fresh clothes, soon getting an
unexpectedly charming boyish look. “No matter how far away it is.”
 
The younger girl seemed to be really considering her answer, biting her lower
lip in concentration until it came and her whole expression changed when a
smile slowly creeped up on her face.
 
“Nepal.”
 
“Nepal?”
 
“It’s really far away.” Jisoo commented with a smile, even chuckling when Tzuyu
shrugged.
 
“You have a fast car.”
 
“That I do.”
 
Tzuyu leaned closer then, and she pecked Jisoo’s lips softly before handling
her one of her shirts, shrugging again when the older woman sent her a
questioning look.
 
“I want to be able to see your tattoos and all the marks I left. I like those.”
She simply explained, now smiling cheekily when Jisoo whined and pushed her
softly, putting the sleeveless shirt on anyway.
 
"We can start calling each other by different names when we get to the city."
Tzuyu stated thoughtfully, the volume of her voice gradually going down as
Jisoo closed in until their foreheads touched. "So we can start over in peace."
 
Jisoo closed her eyes as she considered options until the softest of smiles
invaded her beautiful face. She interlaced her fingers with Tzuyu's and kissed
her chin and both of her cheekbones as she sat on her lap, holding her close as
if she wanted to melt into her again. A subtle nod was her agreement and they
started to whisper different syllables one after the other, trying to find a
middle point between their birth names and the new identity they would take in
order to leave all the pain behind.
 
"Jihyo." Tzuyu whispered against Jisoo's lips, kissing her softly.
 
“Yonghee." Jihyo answered, kissing her back.
 
And they agreed, because it sounded good; after a while, or a whole life, they
finally had words in their language to say "home"
 
**
 
“Jihyo?” She softly called, when she noticed the material of one of her beanies
resting beside her, a memory immediately making her smile.
 
“Yes, love?” She replied without taking her eyes of the road.
 
“Can we go somewhere first?”
 
“Where?” Jihyo replied, without even questioning her about her motives.
 
“I have a call to make, and some friends I would like to see before we leave.”
 
End Notes
     I might write an epilogue, who knows.
     Anyway, I hope you enjoyed, and even if I didn't make the real story
     justice, I think the message I was trying to give is definitively
     there.
     Thank you for the support, we'll see each other soon!
     -RaccoonEyedNerd
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