Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/6054997.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Terminator:_The_Sarah_Connor_Chronicles
  Relationship:
      John_Connor/Derek_Reese
  Character:
      John_Connor, Derek_Reese
  Additional Tags:
      Future_Memories, First_Kiss, First_Time, Derek_remembers_John_but_it's
      John's_first_time, Top_Derek, Bottom_John, Incest, Uncle/Nephew_Incest
  Stats:
      Published: 2016-02-19 Words: 2830
****** Calendar ******
by hunters_retreat
Summary
     Derek dropped the gun on the desk by John’s computer. John looked up
     at him, surprise in his eyes and a question there that Derek didn’t
     want to answer.
     “Don’t say I never did anything for you,” Derek said as he walked out
     of John’s room.
Notes
See the end of the work for notes
He didn’t know why he did it. As with most things that involved John Connor,
Derek never understood his impulses. John Connor or John Baum, they both
confused the hell out of him. The young man in front of him the most. He wasn’t
John Connor yet, but there was steel in him and Derek began to see him more and
more. He was a fascinating contradiction of the hard man he would become and a
young man that still wanted to make the world right. He was idealistic but with
a pessimism and ruthlessness that his mother couldn’t seem to see.
Derek dropped the gun on the desk by John’s computer. John looked up at him,
surprise in his eyes and a question there that Derek didn’t want to answer.
“Don’t say I never did anything for you,” Derek said as he walked out of John’s
room.
When he saw it, he’d had to get it for John. It looked just like the one an
older John Connor kept in his right hand thigh holster. It was the one he kept
even when it was out of bullets. Derek didn’t know why that one had been
special to him over the years. Just another mystery about John that Derek had
never had the time or need to uncover.
Derek went back to his room and sat at the edge of the bed. He was out of his
depth in this world. He didn’t remember how to live in a world without metal.
Sometimes he thought it might break him.
He heard the soft footfall out in the hallway and looked up when John opened
the door. He stepped inside and closed the door behind him.
“What was that?” John asked.
“Happy Valentine’s Day,” Derek said.
“Derek, it’s May.”
“Like I care about a calendar.”
John let out a small laugh at that. “So why the gun?”
“I thought you could use it.”
“We have plenty of guns.”
“Your mother’s guns. My guns. Her guns. Not yours.”
Derek wasn’t surprised when John pulled the gun from the back of the waistband
of his jeans. It felt right to see John Connor with it in his hands.
“I feel bad. I didn’t get you anything.”
“I owed you anyway. We can count it even now.”
“Maybe I want to give you something,” John said as he took a step closer.
Derek knew the look in John’s eyes. He shouldn’t. Not this John. He was too
young. He had too much to live for still and Derek was just an old soldier with
nothing left to give.
“What do you think you’re doing John?” Derek asked as John stepped in between
his knees. He didn’t want to look up to see the young man’s eyes but he
couldn’t help himself. This was his nephew. More than that, it was the man who
would someday be Derek’s lover. In the future, where Derek didn’t know the dark
secret that John had kept. He didn’t know if it would have made a difference in
the future. It hadn’t to John.
“I’m giving you a gift.”
There was nothing shy or uncertain in John’s voice. He held his gun out between
them. “I don’t know why you bought this but it means something,” John said.
“Not now. Not here. In the future this means something to you.”
John had always been too damn observant.
He leaned over and sat the gun down on the table beside Derek’s bed. His neck
was exposed to Derek and he closed his eyes and tried not to breathe in the
scent of John that had become too familiar.
“Let me give you something,” John turned his head slightly as he spoke and the
words were whispered into Derek’s ear.
It was more than he could take. He grabbed John by the arms and flipped him
over onto the bed. He pressed into John’s thighs with his knees, spread him
wide underneath him. He gripped John’s hands over his head and let his weight
rest where the hard press of his cock slid maddeningly against John’s.
“You think I won’t accept what you have to offer, John? You think because I
know who you are that I won’t take what I want from you? You don’t know me well
enough to make those assumptions.”
John’s eyes were wide but there was no fear in his eyes. “I don’t know you?” he
asked. “I know you better than you know yourself.”
“John.”
“You don’t let people close in the future because you know that you would
sacrifice them for your brother without hesitation. You sleep on a pile of guns
because in the future, you’re all your brother has. You won’t know how to fight
at first, but you’ll learn. Not all the scars on your body are from metal and
more than a few are from early on when people were just as much a threat to
your brother as the metal was.”
Derek’s mouth opened but he had no idea what he wanted to say. It was too
accurate, too honest, and he’d never told anyone what had happened to him when
the world went to shit and he’d had to find a way to keep his brother alive.
“I know you watch this world like it’s a snow globe because as pretty as it is
to look at, it’s fragile and you know something’s going to come along and smash
the hell out of it. You do most of what my mom tells you to out of respect for
what she taught future-John and for how your brother felt about her, but you
don’t like her because if Kyle hadn’t loved her he’d still be alive.”
Derek didn’t loosen his grip on John’s wrists but there was something about the
way he looked at him that made Derek want to run. Too much truth and he didn’t
want John to know the rest. He doubted it was still a secret anymore though.
“You don’t look for a lover in this time, because you already have one. You
watch and wonder if it’s time yet, because even though you don’t remember this,
he does. You keep waiting for me to do something because in the future you
didn’t know it would happen this way, but you know now that he did.”
Derek didn’t know how else to shut John up so he bit his bottom lip before he
sucked it between his own. John moaned under him and Derek felt his hips try to
rise up off the bed. He couldn’t move without Derek’s permission though and he
had no intention of letting John up. He was right. Derek had been waiting
because there were so many things John had said over the years, small,
insignificant things, that made so much sense now. Because John remembered
things that hadn’t happened for Derek yet.
“Derek,” John pleaded against his lips, “please.”
Derek let go of John and sat back on his heels. John looked utterly debauched
in a way that he’d never seen in the future. Maybe it was the innocence that
tried so hard to cling to his boy, or maybe it was just that Derek had the
chance to take his time and make this worth remembering.
He didn’t say anything as he reached down to pull the hem of his tee shirt over
his head. John leaned up and traced his fingers over the tattoos and scars that
spattered Derek’s torso. He’d done it a hundred times before but this was the
first time and damn if it didn’t feel like it. He shivered with John’s touch
and his boy grew bolder as he pressed his lips against the old bullet wound on
Derek’s chest. His left hand caressed the knife wound across his side and Derek
felt dizzy with the attention.
Derek slid over to the side and as he shifted John pushed him onto his back to
give himself more room. John’s hands and lips continued to explore and he
almost felt self-conscious about the imperfections in his skin, except Derek
had earned every one of them in John’s name or in his father’s name.
He closed his eyes at the thought of his brother. He tried not to think of what
Kyle would have to say. He’d like to think, knowing the circumstances, his
brother would forgive him. On his bad days, when he thought Kyle wouldn’t, he
said fuck you right back, because Kyle had left him in the first place.
John’s fingers danced over the edge of Derek’s waistband and it was only then
he could feel the nervousness of the young man over him. He didn’t have the
words to sooth him so instead he wrapped his hand around John’s neck and
brought their lips together.
The kiss was unlike anything they shared in the future, too soft and slow to be
from the frantic world they met in. It made his head spin, to think this was
the first kiss John would remember. That this first time would be what John
remembered to help him through what he called the ‘dark days’. He’d hinted so
many times about the memories that got him through, of the time before and the
friends and family that helped him survive.
John had taught Derek most of what he knew about being a good soldier. Derek
had been a survivor before he met John, but it was Connor who made him a
soldier. Who saw how to turn his need to protect his brother into something
more.   He couldn’t think about the implications now, not with John in his bed
and an empty house around them.
Derek pressed up into John and the young man leaned back. He pulled John’s
shirt over his head and then flipped him over. John let out a startled cry as
he landed on his back but he just smiled as Derek settled between his knees. He
pressed a kiss to John’s lips again then worked down the long column of his
neck as he began to undo John’s pants.
John arched his back and moaned. Derek bit lightly at his neck. “I’ve got you,
John,” he said softly.
He moved steadily then and undressed John. As each piece of clothing was
removed, Derek ran his fingers lightly over his perfect skin. The scars he knew
were gone and he set about to learn the body of his lover all over again.
He had his fingers wrapped around John’s cock when John stilled his hand.
“Derek, please,” he whispered against Derek’s neck.
“What do you want, John?”  
“Derek, I want you,” he begged.
“To do what?” he asked.
“Come on, Derek,” John gasped as Derek began to stroke his length again. John’s
fingers tightened around Derek’s hand but he didn’t try to stop him. “Fuck me.”
Derek dropped his forehead to John’s shoulder and took a deep breath. “Jesus,
John,” he murmured against his skin.
He didn’t try to slow down then. He needed to make this good for John, to make
this first something better than the frantic scramble on the floor of a
deserted subway tunnel that he remembered.
John reached into the bedside table and pulled out the lube Derek kept there.
He didn’t want to know how John knew what he had there. Derek took the hint and
pulled away from John then. He tugged his boots off and quickly undressed. As
he did, he watched John fumble his way out of his pants and underwear.
Derek took his time again, tracing the path of John’s body with his lips. He
caressed the smooth skin of John’s hip and drew the future outline of the scars
and wounds that Derek knew so well.
“Will I have as many scars as you?” John asked.
Derek looked up at him and shook his head. “On the outside, no. On the inside?
We’re all just a bunch of scar tissue.”
John gave him a small, lopsided smile that Derek had gotten used to. It wasn’t
a real smile – Derek rarely spoke about things that could make someone smile –
but it was an appreciation of the truth.
He leaned up and kissed John again before he found the bottle and covered his
fingers. He reached down with dripping fingers and began to open John. John
moaned as Derek pressed the first finger in but his boy was resilient and eager
and he pushed back into Derek’s hand for more.
He didn’t rush it but John wouldn’t take it easy and Derek wasn’t exactly a
saint. When he lined himself up and pressed into John’s body he had to take
long steady breaths to keep from coming before they even started.
This was his John.   Not Kyle’s or Sarah’s. Not Cameron’s or even the
Resistance’s. John was his and always would be because John Fucking Connor
would remember this even when Derek Reese didn’t know who John Connor was.
He buried himself in John’s body, buried his face in John’s neck, and gripped
John’s shoulders tight as he began to thrust inside him. John wrapped his legs
around Derek and pulled him in tighter, harder, faster. It was too much and
never enough, just like it always had been with John.
His John.
He felt the tremors in John’s body and Derek raised himself up on one elbow to
reach between them. He began to slowly slide his hand up and down John’s cock.
“Derek,” his boy keened under him and Derek could feel his release building.
“Come for me, John,” he said against his lips.
He tightened his hand and stroked John faster until John’s body tightened under
him. He felt the warm splash of come over his fist and on his stomach. John
called his name, begged and pleaded for something and then Derek thrust sharply
as he came inside John.
He stayed still for a few minutes, too satisfied and content to move. When John
began to squirm under him though, Derek pulled out and dropped onto the bed
beside John.
They lie on the bed, side by side for a few minutes before John turned on his
side to look at Derek. Derek gave him a small smile as he looked up at him.
“So, we’re lovers in the future.”
Derek nodded. “For a while now. I don’t think anyone knew. It’s not hard to be
discrete when we’re not usually in the same place for too long.”
“Is it what you want? In the future?”
Derek shrugged. “Things are different in the future. I want a world free of
metal. Once I get that, then I can worry about what I want.”
“So this is good enough for now?”
Derek shook his head. “This is good enough for always, John. We just don’t get
that option.”
John pulled himself up to Derek’s chest and rested his head there. Derek didn’t
know what his boy was thinking about but his breath evened out and he fell
asleep in Derek’s arms. Derek didn’t take long to find dreams himself.
 
**
 
Derek watched as John sat down on the bed and shoved his foot in his boot. It
was hours before dawn, but John had a meeting with his inner circle and he
needed time to prepare for it. Derek had no idea what John had to tell them,
but he’d never try to take advantage of his relationship with John. Derek was
just grateful that John confided him in some things. Small things, really, but
they mattered. To a human, they mattered.
John looked over his shoulder at Derek who had turned onto his side to watch
his lover dress. “I would rather stay in bed, you know,” John confessed.
Derek did, but he didn’t need to say it. John turned and pressed a kiss to
Derek’s lips but it was chaste, a good bye before the day began and John and
Derek were just a soldier and his commanding officer. Never just that, really,
because Kyle was John’s right hand and Derek went where Kyle did.
John put his hand on the door to slide it open but stopped. With a soft shake
of his head, he turned back around to Derek and pulled a gun out of his left
holster. It wasn’t John’s favorite gun, the one he’d mentioned in passing just
the night before. The one give to him by someone John had once loved. It was a
Beretta, 9mm, and it was a beautiful piece of work. He didn’t know where John
came about a gun that looked almost new, but John handed it to him and Derek
felt the weight of it in his hands.
“Don’t say I never did anything for you,” John said with a soft smile.
“What?”
“Happy Valentine’s Day.”
“John, it’s fucking October.”
John’s smile grew as he reached down and kissed Derek. “Like I care about the
calendar.”
 
 
 
 
   
End Notes
     Belated Valentine's Day :P I asked for prompts, but I was watching T:
     SCC and this came to me instead. Still working on those other
     prompts!
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