Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/286646.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Glee
  Relationship:
      Kurt_Hummel/Noah_Puckerman
  Character:
      Kurt_Hummel, Noah_Puckerman, Rachel_Berry, Finn_Hudson, Blaine_Anderson,
      David_Karofsky
  Stats:
      Published: 2011-12-02 Words: 2930
****** Broken Showers and Missleading Underwear ******
by CrimeSceneDisturber_Extraordinaire
Summary
     If this is what broken showers and being wrong can lead to, then I'd
     love to be stinky and wrong all the time.
“Puck, hey Puck!” I turn my head to see Finn running across the field to the
locker-room entrance where I am. “Yeah?”
“Are you still coming over tonight for video games and pizza?” he asks as if we
don’t do that already, every Friday. “Of course, I wouldn’t miss your mom’s
homemade pizza for anything.” I reply with a shrug, cause seriously nothing
could keep me away from real bacon on anything.
“Oh, I wasn’t sure considering …..” he trails off and gets this guilty look on
his face that he always gets when he feels bad about something that he may or
may not be doing. I know what he means though; it’s the first time I’ll be over
at his house since his mom married Mr. Hummel. Me and Kurt aren’t the best of
friends but we aren’t going to kill each other if we stay in one room together
for more than an hour. Besides he’s attractive enough to be considered eye
candy, so no complaint there. I’m Bi so what, just means I have the possibility
of getting laid more often than a straight dude.
“Like I said, nothing could keep me away, including bitchy little step-
brothers.” He laughs at that and we turn to go to the showers. We were just
about to strip when coach comes out to tell us that a pipe has busted and won’t
be fixed til sometime next week. “If at all.” I scoff. She just rolls her eyes
and shoos us out.
We make our way to my truck cause Hummel already left, leaving Finn to find his
own ride home. Thankfully it’s a short ride to his house, cause there is only
so much man stink I can take in such a confined space. Finn goes up to take a
shower in the bathroom first, so I stay down stairs playing Mario Kart til he
comes back down stairs. And there’s that guilty look again.
“Uhhh Rachel called, she says she needs me for something for a few hours but
I’ll be back in time for dinner at around 8, and we still have all day tomorrow
and” I cut him off, cause seriously he starting to sound like a chick.
“Dude it’s cool, I get it she’s your chick.” And I do get it, cause even though
it was short lived I dated Rachel I know how she gets. “Thanks man, also there
something up with the shower.”
“What do you mean?” he shrugs “I don’t know I think the water pressures out or
something, you might try fixing it or just use Kurt’s bathroom.”
I give him a ‘what the hell look’ and ask “You mean I could have already taken
a shower instead of wallowing in my own man stink?” like I said only so much I
can take. He gives me that guilty little smirk and I just push him towards the
door. “Whatever dude, just go appease Rachel so you get back sooner and I can
kick your ass in Halo just that much quicker.”
After that Finn leaves and I make my way up to Hummel’s room to take my shower.
And damn if His bathroom isn’t ten times better than the other one. He has a
Jacuzzi style tub and a separate shower and all the major pieces (the toilet,
the tub, the shower, the sink) are black marble. The floor is black tiled and
the walls are painted a dark green. The faucets and shit are silver and he has
black and green towels in a cupboard. The wood surfaces in the bathroom are
dark mahogany, it looks like. If I didn’t know any better, I swear I would have
just stepped into a bathroom at Malfoy Manor. So I like (maybe obsessed with)
Harry Potter, screw me.
I grab one of the towels and set it off to the side with my underwear. I turn
the shower on to get the temp right and make sure I have some soap and shampoo.
I wind up using some sort of bath wash of Kurt’s, that smells the manliest, as
well as shampoo and conditioner from the same product line and I have to admit
this is the best I felt after a shower in a long time. Maybe there is something
to be said about the products he uses all the time if they make you feel this
good, and only after one use. I wrap the towel around my waist after I put on
my underwear, just in case.
As soon as I walk out of the bathroom I hear a gasp and as I look up I can’t
help but smirk. Kurt Hummel is standing before me, staring at my groin region.
As i let the towel fall away, I give my hips a little thrust.
I clear my throat, make sure I have his attention and ask,“Like what you see,
Hummel?” the blush that I get makes me smirk even more and I think that I can
deal with broken showers, if this is what it gets me.
 
.............................................................'About a month
before'..............................................................
 
'I can't believe it' was the first thought that came to Kurt's mind as he
watched Puck dance (not so smoothly) across the floor of the choir room.
'Then again...... I totally can' was the one that came right after.
 
Kurt is a people watcher. He spends hours in the mall (after buying out half
the stores there) people watching. He loves it and because of it he became very
good at reading people and learning things about them that they might not want
him knowing. He learned that half the guys on the football team weren't as
straight as they claim to be. He learned that Artie was still in love with Tina
no matter how much he denied it. He also learned that Blaine wasn't as into him
as he thought when he saw the longing looks he gave Karofsky on occasion. He
was hurt when they broke up but that's another story. And now as he sat in his
chair watching his , dance challenged, teammates run through the choreography
...again, he thinks he knows that Puck has a secret.
See there's a rumor at McKinley that Puck is more than well endowed, but Kurt
now has reason to doubt the truth in that rumor. He knows that the metallic
waist band peeking out from under Puck's pants belong to underwear designed by
Andrew Christian. Underwear that's also known as the chicken cutlet for men.
Andrew Christian is the designer that came up with the idea for male
enhancement underwear. The briefs he designed has a pocket in the front, in
which to place a foam contouring cup, to make it look as though the guys penis
is bigger than it actually is. That is how he decides the rumor about Puck is
possibly false and that is why Puck is such a dick all the time, because if
you're that small to need enhancement underwear you'd be an asshole too.
Kurt tries his best not to care about the underwear Puck is wearing. He tries
to forget that Puck just keeps on pretending, keeps on lying. He tries; he
really does try to just let it go, but Kurt being Kurt..... He knows it’s a
lost cause. It's not that he's a nosy person, it’s just that when he wants to
know something it bugs him til he is (almost) pulling his hair out and he just
can’t stop thinking about it until he knows for sure. This is becoming one of
those things that he just has to know. So he tries a different tactic than just
ignoring. It’s time to play detective.... again.
Kurt's been following Puck around , covertly of course (if he had his Sai
swords, he'd really be like a ninja). He's tried peeking in the locker room but
that just ended with him red faced and running from the place when he caught
Karof.... Dave and Blaine instead. He had seriously considered splashing
another slushy in his face, just to see if it would wipe the memory from his
mind. He tried again when they were changing into their outfits for Sectionals
but is thwarted and forced to help his step brother because if he didn’t, he
would've had to explain to Carole how her son had strangled himself with his
tie. Though once he got that straightened out, Puck was already dressed. The
only other time he had a chance (and it was by accident when he opened that
supply closet, he swears) was ruined because Puck was turned around but at
least he knew now that Puck really does have a nice ass, especially when not
covered by baggy jeans.
He's almost at his wits end and this close to just asking Puck for proof, when
said person comes strolling out of the en suite bathroom, HIS bathroom... in
HIS bedroom in nothing but a towel and the underwear that started this whole
(he refuses to call it stalking) thing. He can't help the way he stares at
Pucks chest, watching the water droplets roll down and disappearing into the
waist band underneath the towel. And as the towel falls away, his eyes travel
down to land on the um.... package encased there and he has to bite back a
moan.
He's brought out of his reverie by someone clearing their throat and he
realizes Puck has been watching him, watch Puck.
"Like what you see, Hummel?" Puck asks quirking an eyebrow and pulling a smirk.
Kurt says the first thing that comes to mind "Depends on if what I’m looking at
is real."
Not 'What are you doing in my house' or better yet 'What are you doing in my
bathroom' . No his brain apparently has shut of the filter to his mouth because
that is not what he was going to say.
As soon as he says it he turns bright red, blush creeping all the way down his
neck. He curses he pale skin sometimes and this is one of those times.
Puck looks confused by the statement for second, and then a look of
understanding comes over his face.
"Just because i wear a certain kind of underwear doesn't mean that it isn't
real." Puck says continuing to smirk at Kurt.
"But that's what it implies, for those who know what the underwear is for."
Kurt says trying to keep his averted on anything but Puck because if he
continues to look at the mostly naked boy, he's going to have bulging underwear
of his own.
Puck shakes his head and moves closer to Kurt, who backs away for fear of what
Puck might be planning to do.
As if Puck can read his mind he says "Relax Hummel, I’m not going to hurt you.
I just want to prove to you that im all real and i don't need anything to
enhance my maleness." He takes Kurt’s’ hand and presses it to the front of his
briefs, letting Kurt feel that he is definitely all real and growing.
Kurt pulls his hand back reluctantly "Then why would you wear those?" he asks
motioning to Pucks front.
“I like the style... and they are the only ones that I can really 'FIT' into
without it being uncomfortable, before I found these I usually just went
commando."
Kurt thinks about what that must mean. That Puck is so big that he needs extra
space to put everything just be comfortable. Kurt feels himself blushing again
at that thought. And again his brain to mouth filter must still be shut off
because the next thing he asks is....
"How big are you?"
Puck grins and asks, as he leans forward into Kurt’s space, "Do you really want
to know?"
And all Kurt can do is blush and nod because he's pretty sure his brain has
completely shut down now.
Puck grins and puts his thumbs in the waist band of his underwear and tugs them
off in one fluid motion. Then he's standing there in front of Kurt. Completely
naked and completely hard. Kurt forces himself to keep his eyes on Pucks chest,
until Puck grabs his chin and tilts his head up to look into his eyes.
"Are you sure you want to do this Kurt?" Puck asks gently and Kurt nods his
head again so Puck steps back a little and directs Kurt’s head down. When he
finally gives in and looks at Pucks cock, his mouth waters and his own cock
twitches in his pants. Puck has to be at least 10 inches maybe 12. He is ......
huge!
Kurt tentatively reaches a hand out and brushes the head of Pucks cock. It's
soft and little damp from the precum leaking from it. Kurt gets bolder and
wraps his hand loosely around Puck and strokes and few times. He chances a
glance back up at Puck and what he sees makes his cock twitch again. Pucks
pupils are blown wide with want and he has his bottom lip between his teeth,
when Kurt rubs over the head of his cock again, Puck lets out a little moan
from the back of his throat. Puck wraps his own hand around Kurt’s (still
looking at his face), squeezing slightly to add to the pressure, then he starts
thrusting up into Kurt’s hand and throws his head back and moans again, a
little louder this time. Kurt lets him continue for 3 more thrusts, and then he
takes his hand away and pushes Puck back. As the back of Pucks knees hit his
bed and forces him to sit down, Kurt gets on his knees in front of Puck. Puck
looks at him again, a question in his eyes and moans again when Kurt takes the
head of his cock into his mouth. He's not the most experienced at this but by
the noises Puck is making, he knows he good. He had a feeling that the whole
'no gag reflex' thing would wind up working out for him in other ways than just
being able to brush his tongue with no problem.
As he thinks this, that's exactly what he does to Puck, and Puck all but
screams when he swallows around him. With only a grunt for a warning, Kurt
swallows down the cum that's coming out of Puck in warm spurts. A little
escapes his mouth when he pulls off and he brings his hand up to wipe it away
but Puck beats him to it by dragging his thumb across Kurt’s bottom lip.
"That was.... just ..... Uh... Wow." Puck stammers out and Kurt’s confidence
shoots up a level despite his lack of experience. Puck falls back on his bed
and Kurt gets up and starts to leave when Puck reaches out and stops him by
grabbing his wrist.
"Where do you think you're going?" Puck asks accusingly and as Kurt stammers
something about Puck being straight and not wanting to make him uncomfortable
Puck rolls his eyes, sits back up and tugs Kurt back in front of him.
"Oh no, I’m not done with you yet, you're not going anywhere til I've had you
writhing underneath me moaning and screaming my name til you come so hard you
pass out."
Kurt tries to explain that Puck doesn’t need to reciprocate, that he doesn't
need to risk his reputation of being the straight jock to just make Kurt happy.
He tries to tell Puck to stop, but his protest are obviously half-hearted
because even though he's saying no, he still lets Puck undress him, still lets
Puck pull him down on the mattress, still lets Puck kiss him fiercely and leave
and trail of burning kisses down his chest, and still lets Puck push his knees
up to his chest as Puck licks at his entrance. He moans and bucks up wildly
when he feels Pucks tongue entering him, stretching him out for something
larger. He cries out "Noah" when Puck places a spit slick finger inside him and
again when Puck adds a second finger. He's lost all form of speech when Puck
has three fingers thrusting inside him and when Puck brushes up against that
sweet spot, he almost screams. He whimpers when Puck removes his fingers and
moans when something bigger is trying to replace them.
He's panting hard by the time Puck is fully in and he practically yells at Puck
to “Move, damn you!”
When Puck complies, Kurt’s given up on trying to understand why this is
happening when he thinks he knows that Puck is straight and focuses more on
Puck thrusting in and out of him. And when he angles his hips just right and
keeps hitting that spot over and over he's forgotten everything except "Noah,
Noah, Noah." over and over again. And when he comes, he's pretty sure the
neighbors now know Puck's name and before he can truly think about what that
might mean for him, all he sees is black.
When he comes back to consciousness 15 minutes later, he’s startled by a soft
chuckle from his right. When he looks over to find Puck, he's slightly nervous
for second til he remembers what had happened previously then he smiles and
snuggles closer to Puck, and Puck lets him.
"Told you I would make you black out." Puck says smugly.
And Kurt finds himself thinking that he wouldn't mind being wrong all time if
this is what it gets him.
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