Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/5437217.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      F/M
  Fandom:
      Miraculous_Ladybug
  Relationship:
      Chat_Noir/Marinette_Dupain-Cheng
  Character:
      Chat_Noir_(Miraculous_Ladybug), Marinette_Dupain-Cheng
  Additional Tags:
      Angst, So_much_angst, I'm_actually_crying_really_hard_right_now, angsty
      Marichat, Break_up_sex, pre-reveal, 50_reasons_to_have_sex
  Series:
      Part 3 of 50_Reasons_to_Have_Sex:_Miraculous_Ladybug_Edition
  Stats:
      Published: 2015-12-16 Words: 1421
****** Break-Up Sex ******
by LittleMissWolfie
Summary
     She almost loves him, but it's not enough.
Notes
     My friend/beta reader suggests that you listen to the music box remix
     of Simple and Clean to fully appreciate the angst. Listen here
     (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YbjQqWFxbaM)
See the end of the work for more notes
Chat Noir is at her window again. The sight of him, so giddy to be on her
balcony, makes Marinette’s heart clench painfully in her chest.
 
She should have known not to let her civilian and superhero lives intersect.
She should have known not to point Chat in her direction, even if it meant they
would have an easier time defeating the akuma. She should have known to not let
him in her room when he showed up after patrols. Over all, she should have
known not to let him kiss her.
 
But she did, and now she has to deal with a divided heart. Her love for Adrien
is a pure, unattainable thought, while what she has with Chat Noir is
terrifyingly real. And she knows that Chat Noir loves Ladybug, knows that their
little tryst hurts him just as much as it hurts her.
 
So she has decided to end it, once and for all.
 
Tonight.
 
Heavy with the knowledge of what is to come, Marinette slowly makes her way to
the window and opens it, letting him slide inside like he owns the place. His
usual grin is firmly in place, but it slowly slides away when he catches sight
of her expression. “Marinette, what’s wrong?” he asks, and his voice has none
of its usual arrogance.
 
She can feel heat building up behind her eyes, but she blinks it away. She has
to be strong here. If she lets herself be weak, she’ll never be able to let him
go. “Chat,” she said, and she is proud of how steady her voice is, “we need to
stop this.”
 
His face becomes ashen, and Marinette finds it impossible to keep the tears at
bay anymore. They slide down her cheeks in hot trails, and her throat clenches
shut. “Why?” he asks finally. “Did I do something?”
 
She shakes her head violently. “No! No, never you. You’re amazing. It’s
just...it’s not fair, Chat. We both love other people.”
 
He falls silent, for the first time since she has known him. Since the first
time they met, high on the rooftops above the slumbering Paris. Since they
became best friends, since they would die for each other.
 
But Chat doesn’t know that she knows that. And that’s why they need to part
ways as Marinette and Chat. Why they can only interact as teammates.
 
She knows, logically, that this will be easier on both of them in the long run.
If only her heart would agree.
 
Chat wraps his arms around her, and she can’t help but melt into his chest. Her
tears slide off the leather of his suit, and she can taste their salt on her
lips. “It’s all my fault,” she whimpers, and she feels him stiffen around her.
“I shouldn’t have let it get this far.”
 
His clawed hands are on her shoulders and he’s pushing her up. “Marinette, it’s
not your fault,” he says, more serious than she’s ever heard him. “I wanted
this just as much as you.”
 
Wanted. Past tense. Her eyes screw shut.
 
“Just…” she starts, and her voice catches so she has to stop and take in a deep
breath. “Before...before you leave….one last time.”
 
His eyes meet hers, and she can see his unshed tears. “Goodbye?”
 
She nods. “Goodbye,” she repeats.
 
His lips meet hers, and it’s so familiar and melancholy that she can’t help the
noise of despair that escapes from her throat. He guides her backward in a
familiar path until they are horizontal on the pink chaise they often sat on
together. They talked about so many things on this chaise, and knowing that
this will probably be the last time they would share it makes Marinette cry
harder.
 
Marinette reaches blindly to turn off the lamp next to the chaise, which is the
only lit light in the room. It is impossible to partially undress when
transformed, so he has to return to normal in order for them to say their last
goodbye. She screws her eyes shut so the green light emanating from his
transformation will not reveal his identity. She couldn’t live with herself if
she had to go back to being Ladybug with him if she knew his civilian self.
 
When his hands return to her skin, they are all warmth and flesh. She arches
into his touch as he slowly rids her of her pajamas. It seems that he is
unwilling to go any faster than necessary; he wants to prolong this.
 
Finally, she is bare beneath the gaze she cannot see in the pitch blackness of
the room. His hands are tentative as they caress her skin, leaving trails of
fire in their wake. She hears the whisper of fabric as he undresses, and
suddenly every bit of her skin is touching his. Despite the depressing
circumstances of this final meeting, his hardness is growing against her heat.
His lips are fleeting as he presses kisses all the way down the elegant slant
of her neck. A sharp pain radiates from one particular place, and she can’t
bring herself to care about the bruise she will have to hide in the morning. It
is one more reminder of him, no matter how temporary.
 
The anticipation of his visit has left her already wet, but he takes his time
opening her up. He’s more gentle than he’s ever been before, and it makes her
cry just a little harder. He’s crying too, she can tell. Droplets fall onto her
face irregularly and mix with her own tears.
 
When she finally bucks up into the touch of his fingers, Chat withdraws them
from inside of her and replaces it with his member. He enters her slowly,
almost lovingly, and her heart constricts painfully in her chest. Love was the
whole reason they had to go through this. If only Chat had met Marinette before
he met Ladybug, if only Marinette had met Chat before she met Adrien…
 
She is snapped from her thoughts when he slowly thrusts, in and out. She clings
to him like he’s a security blanket, and his embrace is just as tight. They
hold on to each other for dear life as he moves carefully inside her.
 
The emotions behind this act have increased its intensity. He continuously
murmurs into her hair, indistinguishable words she doesn’t care to try to make
out. All she cares about is how their bodies move together, how it will be the
last time it happens.
 
The tip of his member knocks into the bundle of nerves buried deep inside her,
and she arches up with a cry. She clenches tighter around him, and it makes him
speed up, if only by a minute amount.
 
Their bodies climb up to their peaks slowly, with the pace of their hips.
Marinette has never been more relieved for slowness. The longer she can
experience this, the longer she will be able to hold it in her memories. As
they grow closer and closer to climax, her legs wrap around his waist, and
there is suddenly no seam between their bodies. For a single moment, they are a
single entity.
 
And then she’s coming apart, and he swallows her mournful cry as he spills
himself inside her. His hips keep pumping in a valiant attempt to keep them
going, but he is going soft. He growls into her mouth, refusing to let go.
 
Eventually, when there is no more to give, he collapses next to her, pulling
her close to his chest and kissing her hair. “I wish I’d met you first,” he
says brokenly.
 
She holds him tight, tighter than she’s ever held him before. “So do I.”
 
“I hope you find happiness with your prince,” he whispers, and it’s completely
sincere. “You deserve it.”
 
“I almost love you,” she breathes. “I wish I did.”
 
They’re both crying now, and it’s ugly crying. She wishes she could stay in
this moment forever, where neither of them have anything else to worry about.
Where she could change her mind and keep him forever, like she wants to.
 
But she can’t.
 
“Goodbye, Chat Noir,” she says, even though it breaks her heart.
 
He hold on for a moment more before whispering, “Goodbye, my princess.”
 
She pretends to be asleep while he gathers his clothes and transforms back. She
can’t bear to watch his retreating form outlined by the light of the moon,
can’t bear to hear his sobs as he leaves for the last time.
 
 
End Notes
     Whoo, boy. How'd you like that angst?
     Next time: You friend told you about a new position!
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