Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/12255690.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      EXO_(Band)
  Relationship:
      Do_Kyungsoo_|_D.O/Park_Chanyeol
  Character:
      Do_Kyungsoo_|_D.O, Park_Chanyeol, Oh_Sehun, Kim_Jongin_|_Kai, Kim_Jongdae
      |_Chen, Byun_Baekhyun, Kim_Minseok_|_Xiumin, Lu_Han, Kim_Joonmyun_|_Suho
  Additional Tags:
      Homophobia, Internalized_Homophobia, Misunderstandings, Smut, Frottage,
      First_Time_Blow_Jobs, First_Time, Alternate_Universe_-_High_School,
      Friends_to_Lovers, Fluff_and_Angst, Consensual_Underage_Sex, Semi-Public
      Sex
  Collections:
      Takoyaki_Station_2017
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-10-03 Words: 27712
****** Boys Don't Kiss Other Boys ******
by exoccult
Summary
     “We kiss because there’s no girls around for us to kiss.” Surely,
     that’s why they were kissing, right? Why else would they kiss?
     They’re both boys. Boys don’t kiss other boys.
Notes
     Prompt #157
     Summary: “We kiss because there’s no girls around for us to kiss.”
     Surely, that’s why they were kissing, right? Why else would they
     kiss? They’re both boys. Boys don’t kiss other boys.
     Warnings: Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, Crude Language,
     Consensual Underage Sex (they're both minors?), Semi-Public Sex
     Other Pairings: Jongin/Sehun, Luhan/Minseok, Baekhyun/Tao,
     Unrequited!Jongdae/Junmyeon
     Notes: Thank you so much to the mods for their patience with me and
     my plead for an extension. Also, to the OP, I'm not sure what
     happened - I literally just took your prompt and ran away with it. It
     got out of control real quick... I didn't have a beta & I don't have
     time to edit, so I hope that this is good enough.
Kyungsoo adjusts the stiff collar of his new uniform, fingers fidgeting with
the button as he stares at the campus from the main gate. He doesn’t hate the
uniform, he just hasn’t gotten used to it yet, it’s still rigid from the
packaging that he’d only just opened that morning. The tie feels slightly tight
around his neck too, it’s a bit restraining so he loosens it a little before
taking a deep breath and walking up the main path towards what looks like might
be the main building.
It’s slightly old looking, with it’s brick face and antique decorative style -
it reminds him of a faded black and white photograph he’d once seen in a
history textbook. With the wooden doors and dusty paned windows, he’s really
starting to feel as though he stepped back in time. As he approaches the
school, he can see the plaque at the front entrance with an engraving that
reads:
                                 Dr. L. Roman
                           Boarding School for Boys
                            Home of the Gladiators
                                   est. 1934
Despite the state of the building, the grounds look relatively newer with
freshly planted flowers and a set of flags flying in the wind. There’s three on
each side of the school, one looks discernibly like the school’s crest and the
other five are all different colours with animals on them, but Kyungsoo doesn’t
think much about them. He’s too distracted by a porcelain fountain at the
centre of the entryway courtyard, sparkling in the bright light of the sun.
There’s a winged baby - cupid - standing at the top of it, his carved butt on
full display as he blows water from a trumpet. Kyungsoo tries not to laugh out
loud.
If the outside had looked old to Kyungsoo, when he steps inside the building he
really thinks he may have been picked up and dropped right into the 1930’s.
Everything about the interior is so outdated - wallpaper, flooring, light
fixtures and all. Kyungsoo is greeted by a large bust on a pillar and another
plaque that has Dr. L. Roman’s name on it.
Along the hall, lining both sides of the polished wooden floorboards, are more
busts - smaller in stature - on pedestals, each with a name of a previous
headmaster. Kyungsoo just barely pays attention to them as he walks down the
corridor, more fixated on finding the headmaster’s office so he can get his
handbook and whatever he was told to retrieve in his acceptance letter to the
school.
He makes it to what looks like the headmaster’s secretary’s office, about to
turn the doorknob, when another student throws open the door from the inside.
The boy is slightly… a lot… A lot taller than Kyungsoo. He’s got skin like
caramel and bright, brown eyes that greet Kyungsoo.
“Hi,” he says, reaching a hand out to Kyungsoo, “Kyungsoo, yeah?”
Kyungsoo looks at the hand hanging between them and squints at it, like he’s
never shaken a hand before, and then he hesitantly accepts. The boy shakes
Kyungsoo’s hand excitedly and then to Kyungsoo’s surprise, he pulls him right
into the small reception room. A secretary sitting at the main desk smiles at
them both as they enter.
“You must be Do Kyungsoo,” the secretary greets as she stands up, “This is Kim
Jongin. He’ll be one of your roommates.”
“Nice to meet you,” Jongin beams, his eyes taking the shape of crescents.
“Nice to meet you too,” Kyungsoo says slowly, looking back and forth between
Jongin and the secretary.
The secretary clears her throat after a minute and reaches down behind her desk
before producing a tan canvas bag with brown leather straps and gold clasps,
handing it to Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo accepts it questioningly and, obviously
sensing his confusion, the secretary explains that all new students receive a
bag complimentary of the boarding school. By complementary, Kyungsoo knows that
it was just taken out of the outrageous tuition price that his parents are
paying for him to be there.
“Your handbook, a formal uniform and a few other complementary materials are
inside.” the secretary explains, “I’ll let Jongin show you around the campus.
We hope you enjoy your time at this school.” she says like she means it.
Kyungsoo thanks her with an awkward smile before he looks at Jongin, “Uh,” he
says ungracefully, “I guess I’ll let you lead the way.”
Jongin leads Kyungsoo immediately out of the main building and, instead of
returning from where they had come, Jongin skirts around the back of the
building taking an old beaten down path. It seems somehow more scenic this way
as they turn the corner and come across a large gazebo and pond at the back of
the main building. Jongin points over the tops of the trees where a few
different shaped roofs covered in foliage stick out from as if trying to blend
in with the surrounding.
“Over there,” Jongin says, gaining Kyungsoo’s attention, “That’s Gladiator
Boulevard.”
Kyungsoo makes a weird face, “You’re joking.” he says.
“If only I were,” Jongin snorts, “That’s where the dorms are. I’ll show you
them later.”
Kyungsoo nods and falls into step with Jongin’s long strides, taking two quick
steps for every one of Jongin’s. They cut across the back of the main building
and come out at a second wrought iron gate. At the top of the barred gate
doors, it reads Home of the Gladiators. There’s a man standing at the entrance
who looks like a security guard, checking badges of students entering.
“I don’t have a badge,” Kyungsoo realizes belatedly and Jongin looks down at
him, pointing at the bag he was given.
Kyungsoo looks down at the bag hanging off of his shoulder and reaches inside
the first pocket, feeling around until his fingers brush against hard plastic
and a metal clip. He pulls out an ID badge with a photo that he had been forced
to take the day of his interview with the headmasters of the boarding school.
He grimaces at the sight of his trimmed hair and a pair of round glasses
staring back at him.
“That thing will get you just about anywhere on campus,” Jongin says as he
pulls his own out from the inside pocket of his black blazer, “And I can get
you just about anywhere else,” he says with a wink, flashing his badge to the
security guard as they walk by.
Kyungsoo slows down to show his to the man at the door, who seemingly
appreciates it as he lets Kyungsoo go on with the wave of a hand. He quickly
catches up with Jongin who is waiting just beyond the gate under the shade of
one of the million maple trees on campus. They scatter almost all of the
grounds and Kyungsoo feels like he’s never seen so many in one place before.
Jongin smiles at him once he finally catches up.
“Welcome to the campus, Soo,” Jongin says, slinging an arm around his new
comrade’s shoulders, “You’ll love it here, really.”
Kyungsoo shifts underneath the heavy weight of Jongin’s arm pulling him down,
“Debatable.”
Jongin laughs and lets his arm drop, “This is the main campus building for
classes. All of the auditoriums are own the first floor, classrooms take up the
second, third and fourth floors while the fifth and sixth floor are all
professor offices. The headmasters have offices here too, but they never really
use them since it’s tradition for them to use the offices located at the
original main building. That’s where we just came from.”
“So this is where we take classes…?” Kyungsoo looks up at the building that
towers over them the closer they get.
It’s obviously newer than the first building, but it still looks pretty old
considering it’s the 21st century and this definitely came out of the mid-70’s
at best. The front double doors are tall and wooden and, even worse, they creak
as Jongin pushes them open once they’ve climbed up the concrete stairs, past
the lion statues at the bottom.
“This is where we’ll take classes all year. The gym is down the west wing and
the theatre stage is down the east wing. The north wing has a rotunda for all
of our seminar auditoriums.” Jongin explains as he begins to climb the first
set of stairs, much to Kyungsoo’s horror.
They stop midway through, when a voice calls out to Jogin and the duo turn to
look up at the balcony of the second floor that overlooks the lobby. In the
distance, Kyungsoo can pick out the image of a lanky student, waving his arm
crazily as he leans over the side of the balcony railing.
“Jongin!” he calls, deep voice echoing in the otherwise empty space.
“Hey!” Jongin calls back and nudges Kyungsoo with his elbow, “This is him!”
“I’ll meet you at the top of the stairs!” the boy yells back and Jongin grabs
Kyungsoo’s arm, practically dragging him up the staircase.
Once they reach the top, Kyungsoo looks up to see a tall, smiling student that
towers over even Jongin. He’s got bright, shining eyes, big ears and an over-
enthusiastic smile that stretches across his lips forever. Not to mention the
bright red hair that’s been brushed back to perfection and Kyungsoo’s first
thought is that, despite being kind of loud and obnoxious, that this boy is
actually quite handsome.
“Hi,” the tall boy says, snapping Kyungsoo from his thoughts, “You’re Do
Kyungsoo, am I right?”
Kyungsoo looks at Jongin, then back at the tall boy, “Yes.”
The tall boy grins even wider, somehow, “I’m Chanyeol. Park Chanyeol. I’m your
other roommate.”
Oh. Kyungsoo smiles awkwardly, fidgeting with his fingers and wondering if this
boy, Chanyeol, is going to be just as loud in such close quarters. This could
be a long semester…
“Nice to meet you,” Kyungsoo says quietly, but he offers a brighter smile when
he finally looks up to see how hopefully Chanyeol is looking at him.
Jongin snickers, “We’re all going to get along well. I can tell. Three
musketeers!”
Chanyeol laughs, “All for one and one for all!”
They both look down at Kyungsoo then, expecting some kind of reply, maybe even
searching for acceptance to their silliness and Kyungsoo just nods.
“Unus pro omnibus, omnes pro uno,” Kyungsoo says and the two look at each other
before looking back at Kyungsoo with wide, happy eyes.
“You know Latin?” Chanyeol asks, grinning from ear to ear, because, yes, it is
possible for this boy to smile wider than before.
Kyungsoo shrugs, “I guess I know a bit.”
“Can you tutor me?” Chanyeol blurts and Jongin slaps his arm.
“He only just got here, man, calm down.” he laughs, but there’s no malice.
Chanyeol snorts, rolling his eyes, and Kyungsoo smiles genuinely for the first
time. He gets this feeling that he’ll get alone with these two just fine.
“Would you like to join us for the rest of the tour?” Jongin asks and Chanyeol
pouts.
“I’d love to, but…” he trails off and sighs, “I already promised Yifan that I’d
help him in the art studio.”
Jongin scrunches up his nose, “He didn’t ask you to model, did he?”
Kyungsoo watches as Chanyeol’s face turns a deep shade of red, “Shut up,
Jongin.”
“He did!”
“He’s my friend,” Chanyeol groans, “And I kind of owe this to him.”
“Good luck with that,” Jongin rolls his eyes and hooks his arm with Kyungsoo’s,
“We’ll be off then. See you back at the dorm later? You can go over the
handbook with Kyungsoo instead.”
Chanyeol scratches the back of his neck and thinks this offer over, “Yeah,
okay. That could be fun.”
Kyungsoo gets the feeling that it won’t be fun.
Jongin shows Kyungsoo around the rest of the building, pointing out the
particular classrooms that they’ll most likely be having classes in. Kyungsoo
makes an attempt to absorb it all, but it’s a lot to take in on your first day.
Jongin promises that it’s okay and that he’ll be there to lead him around on
the first day of classes too. This puts Kyungsoo’s mind to ease as Jongin shows
him more and more of the building.
Once they’re done there, Jongin shows him the fine arts building where all of
the studios are located as well as the library and the full sized recreational
hall, equipped with a lounge for all students and several different courts out
back. He points out the cafeteria shortly after that and then that leads them
right back to the gazebo hidden behind the first main building. Kyungsoo’s head
spins with the information overload and he’s really too tired to be doing
anything other than lying in his dorm bed, even if it ends up being an
uncomfortable cot.
“So, this is Gladiator Boulevard, right?” Kyungsoo asks, almost sighs really,
when they reach the gate to what’s basically a cul-de-sac with five different
buildings lining the on-campus street.
Jongin grins, “You bet. Shall I escort you to our common room?”
“What is this?” Kyungsoo snorts, “Hogwarts?”
Jongin barks out a laugh, “I wish. I’m still waiting on my letter.”
Kyungsoo smirks in his attempt to suppress a laugh, “Me too.”
Jongin shakes his head, “Our school is divided up between several faculties, I
guess you could say. You’re in the music department, like me. We don’t have a
cool name though. Or cool house colours like those lucky bastards in Hogwarts,”
Kyungsoo wants to laugh, because Jongin is taking this joke very seriously and
he’s amazed he’s found someone he can goof off with like this already,
“Alright, so what do we get?”
“A weird house name for our dormitory and stupid pinstripes on our blazer
jackets with a specific colour to match it.” Jongin explains with an over
dramatic eyeroll that reminds Kyungsoo a lot of his best friend back home.
“I thought you said we don’t get cool house colours,” Kyungsoo points out and
Jongin gives him this look that makes him burst into laughter.
“Trust me,” Jongin chuckles, “They’re far from cool. I’d proudly wear Slytherin
colours any day. But the awful, dull blue that lines our jackets is u-g-l-y,
ugly. It’s not even a nice blue like Ravenclaw, it’s literally just gross
looking.”
Kyungsoo thinks about Jongin in a Slytherin uniform and tries not to laugh out
loud, “I could wear any blue proudly. I’m a Ravenclaw,” he says and then Jongin
looks him over once.
“I could see that,” Jongin says with a teasing tongue stuck out of the corner
of his mouth and Kyungsoo, well he just laughs all over again.
The tour continues right down the boulevard, and Jongin doesn’t say much as he
passes each house on the street. They all look like the rundown headmasters’
building to Kyungsoo, with brick faces and concrete staircases that lead up to
large wooden doors. The buildings are all overgrown with ivy and lichen, giving
the campus an English Manor look.
Jongin stops at the second last building, there’s a flag waving in the wind
outside that Kyungsoo certainly does not pay attention to. Otherwise he would
have noticed the flags at each of the other buildings. The building they’ve
stopped at looks a lot more like stone than the rest, with a rusted plaque
outside that reads: Arion House.
“I’d say Chanyeol is back by now,” Jongin says as he takes out his ID badge and
swipes it on the keypad outside, finally making Kyungsoo remember that he’s
still living in the 21st century despite all of the architecture and decoration
that says differently.
He opens the door with ease after it beeps and they hear a click. Inside,
there’s a common mudroom followed by a lobby and then a common room with a
fireplace and enough seating for at least thirty students. At the end of common
room, there’s a staircase that goes up on a steep angle and they have the
displeasure of climbing it all the way to the third floor.
There are five floors in total. The first floor is all basically a common
hangout spot while the other three floors are for dormitory, each with ten dorm
rooms. The top floor is for the headmaster to live in, but it is more of an
attic space than an actual floor that only takes up about one third of the
floorplan on all of the other levels.
Kyungsoo and Jongin stop outside of room 306 and Jongin uses his ID badge
again, swiping it at the keypad near the door like they’re at a fancy hotel.
Once the pad beeps and they hear the door click, Jongin leads Kyungsoo inside.
Within the confines of the room, Kyungsoo is more or less surprised to find
that it is actually quite spacious. There’s three beds, two against with their
headboards against the left wall and a third with it’s headboard against the
wall directly opposite. A window opens up to look out over the back of the
building, Kyungsoo can see trees going on for miles when he pulls back the
curtain. In the distance he can see the rooftops of the city.
Beneath the window across from the door is a settee with a few velvet pillows
and to the right of that, there’s a desk and a few shelves tucked in the
corner. A shaggy, cream coloured rug covers the middle of the space between the
beds and the floorboards that creak under their weight as Kyungsoo enters the
room.
There’s a bed that has clearly been decided to be his since his belongings seem
to have been dropped there, the one against the back wall on the left. A trunk
sits unused at the end of his bed and he opens it up only to discover that it
has an antique wood smell. He lets the cover drop with a thud, coughing after
having breathed in the musty scent.
When he sits on his bed, he can see that he’s passed an ensuite on the way in
and that there’s a closet space on the other side including a dresser and
highboy and some hangers that look reserved for himself. On the wall next to
the other bed closest to his own is a wardrobe with a calendar posted on the
outside of it.
“I guess Chanyeol isn’t back yet,” Jongin hums, sitting down on what Kyungsoo
figures is his bed… Which means the one next to his own is Chanyeol’s. And the
guitar sitting between their beds is definitely Chanyeol’s too.
Kyungsoo swings his feet up onto his own bed, finally dropping the canvas bag
from his shoulder so he can sift through the contents. He tosses the ID badge
on his bed, pulls out the neatly folded formal uniform in a plastic sleeve and
then finds a few items with the boarding school’s crest printed on them - a
pen, a notepad, a set of pencils, and a water bottle. At the bottom of the bag
he finds the thick handbook and a folded map of the campus.
Jongin checks the time on his watch and then looks back up at Kyungsoo with an
awkward smile, “Hey, do you mind if I duck out for a bit? I’ll let you get all
settled away. I promised I’d meet up with a friend for a bit… I can bring him
back here to meet you later so you can get used to a few faces at least!”
Kyungsoo nods, “I don’t mind at all.” he says with a smile, “Thanks for taking
me around campus today, you probably didn’t have to-”
“No, no,” Jongin shakes his head, “I offered to do it! I thought it would be a
good way for you to get used to your new buddies.”
Kyungsoo smiles appreciatively and flops back on his bed as soon as Jongin
leaves. He stares at the ceiling for a while, feeling tired after a long day of
walking the entire campus. Loosening his tie in hopes of relaxing, he
straightens up as soon as he hears the keypad beep and the door to the room
click.
“Knock, knock,” a deep voice calls and Kyungsoo thinks this must be Chanyeol.
“Oh,” Chanyeol grins as he enters the room and tosses his bag onto his bed,
“You’re already here.”
Kyungsoo sits up and scoots back on his bed so he’s resting against the
headboard, “I am.”
“How was the tour?” Chanyeol asks, sitting down on his bed, his long legs
stretching between their beds so his feet are touching the bottom of Kyungsoo’s
bed frame.
“Jongin is a good tour guide,” Kyungsoo says, “But it was a long tour.”
Chanyeol grins, “It’s a big campus.”
Silence falls over them and neither are really sure how they should fill it.
Kyungsoo fiddles with his fingers and Chanyeol still sits there, watching
Kyungsoo, trying to think of something to say. Before it can grown awkward,
Chanyeol decides to break the quiet.
“What do you think of Arion House?” he asks and Kyungsoo shrugs.
“It’s a weird name,” he says, “It’s Greek, isn’t it?”
Chanyeol nods with a smile, “Did you see the flag out front?” he asks and
Kyungsoo thinks back to the vague image of fabric blowing in the wind outside
of the front door.
“I think so…” Kyungsoo looks at Chanyeol, “What about it?”
“It’s got our house colour on it,” Chanyeol explains and Kyungsoo perks up at
the sound of that.
“Really?” he sounds intrigued, amused.
Chanyeol grins devilishly, “Really.” he confirms, reaching out with a long arm
to grab the handbook off of Kyungsoo’s bed, flipping a few pages before he lets
out an ‘aha!’
“Arion House,” Chanyeol reads aloud, “Is named after the Greek singer, poet and
lyre performer, Arion.”
Kyungsoo chews into his bottom lip to keep from laughing as Chanyeol reads, “Is
this for real?”
Chanyeol tries to keep a serious tone as he continues, but a smile begins to
form on his face, “This is for real. Definitely for real.”
“No way,” Kyungsoo giggles, “Okay, so we’re in Arion House. What about the flag
outside then?”
“Well, it’s blue,” Chanyeol says slowly, clearly trying to keep his smile
contained.
“Yes, and?” Kyungsoo urges, far too interested now for Chanyeol to be keeping
this to himself.
“But it’s not just any blue. It’s got a special name on it.” Chanyeol explains
with a chuckle, playing with the pages of the handbook.
“Wait, wait,” Kyungsoo chuckles, “So the colour of the house has a name on it
too? What is it?”
“It’s called Placid Blue-” the words barely leave Chanyeol’s mouth before
Kyungsoo cracks up, laughing so hard he clutches his stomach, “Don’t laugh!”
Chanyeol exclaims in mock offense, but he’s laughing too as he flips to the
next page of the handbook, “Oh God, it’s such an ugly colour, look,” he snorts,
turning the handbook around to show the page to Kyungsoo.
The entire page is printed in an awful, dull shade of blue that reminds
Kyungsoo of his grandma’s couch cushions from the 60’s. He really tries not to
laugh when he sees the words Placid Blue printed on the bottom of the page with
an actual, real explanation as to why the Music Department chose this colour to
represent them. Kyungsoo doesn’t even think about reading it, afraid he’d keel
over and die from laughing so hard.
“I can’t believe our formal blazers are lined with this,” Chanyeol says in
disbelief.
“Please tell me we don’t have to wear these colours all the time,” Kyungsoo
groans with a smile plastered on his face and Chanyeol can’t help the grin he’s
giving right back.
“No, dear God, no,” he scrunches up his nose in distaste, “Can you imagine? No,
we only have to wear those blazers on special occasions. It tells us when in
the handbook, there’s also a photo of our crest, do you want to see it?”
“We have like an actual crest too?” Kyungsoo wipes fake tears from his eyes,
“This is too much. Is that what’s on our flag outside? What is it? Let me see.”
Chanyeol gives Kyungsoo a mischievous smile before flipping to the next page to
show a shield shaped crest in the same awful Placid Blue with a bottlenose
dolphin in the middle of it. Kyungsoo doubles over in a wheeze, laughing
loudly.
“It’s a bloody dolphin,” he gasps for air, laughing far too hard, “Why? Just,
why?”
Chanyeol cracks up at Kyungsoo’s reaction, throwing his head back in laughter
and landing flat on his back on his bed, “Oh God, okay, it’s because of the
Dolphins that helped that kid with the lyre, you know, the one our house is
named after - Arion. Greek Mythology.” he says as he props himself up on his
elbows.
“Oh my God,” Kyungsoo giggles, “This school is a riot. Please, tell me the
other houses are just as ridiculous,”
Chanyeol props looks at Kyungsoo with with a glint in his eyes, “They are
exactly as ridiculous as you think they are,” he pats the spot beside him on
his bed in a beckon for Kyungsoo to join him.
Kyungsoo doesn’t even hesitate to fill the space and lean over to look at the
book in Chanyeol’s hands. Chanyeol shifts when Kyungsoo’s thigh presses against
his own and he buries his face in the book, hiding from Kyungsoo.
“Hey, let me see,” Kyungsoo giggles, pulling on the book, “Chanyeol,” he laughs
until Chanyeol relents and reveals his face - his cheeks are red and Kyungsoo
thinks it’s from trying to suppress his laughter.
“Okay, okay,” Chanyeol smiles and shows Kyungsoo the book, “You know the other
departments, right? Dance, Theatre, Literature, and Art,” Kyungsoo nods, “My
friend Yifan is in the Art Department, Pygmalion House, they wear Arcadian
Green,”
“Where do they find the names for these colours?” Kyungsoo snorts, leaning on
Chanyeol for support as he laughs, “Turn to the next page, I want to see their
crest.”
“Theirs is not much better, an owl,” Chanyeol laughs, showing the crest of the
barn owl, “Kind of looks like you,” he says, holding it up next to Kyungsoo’s
face.
“Hey!” Kyungsoo squeaks, but it’s clear that he’s amused, and so is Chanyeol.
Flipping through the handbook, Kyungsoo finds that Chanyeol is probably his
favourite thing about his first day on campus as the two poke fun at silly
school colours and house names. He likes Jongin and all for being so kind and
taking him around the school grounds, but Chanyeol makes him feel like they’re
already close, best friends even. They giggle and lean on each other like
they’ve been friends for years, uncaring of the questionable position they’re
beginning to put themselves in. That is until the door to their dorm room
slammed open against the wall with a bang, startling the door from their giggle
fit.
“You two sound like you’re having fun,” Jongin grins as he enters the room -
there’s a taller, thin boy following behind him with strikingly blonde hair
falling over his eyes.
Before Kyungsoo even recognizes the colour lining the boy’s jacket, he thinks
that he would make a good dancer. The faded Aurora Red of the Apollo House
looks better against the black of their blazers than the dull blue that the
Arion House has the pleasure of sporting. He squints at the boy, thinking he
should definitely be wearing his glasses so he doesn’t look like he’s glaring
at the kid, but he can’t really see him otherwise.
“This is Sehun,” Jongin introduces him and Sehun smiles sheepishly, “He’s in
the Dance Department,”
“Crest with the python?” Kyungsoo asks and Sehun nods.
“You must be Kyungsoo,” he says, “How are you feeling about Drag Day?”
Kyungsoo makes a weird face, “What’s Drag Day?”
Chanyeol grins wide, showing all of his teeth, “When you Drag yourself to
campus on the first day of classes.”
Kyungsoo laughs and Chanyeol laughs with him, which makes Jongin smile in
amusement, “What happened while I was gone? You seem like you’re enjoying
Chanyeol’s company more than mine.” he says with a teasing pout.
“It’s not that-” Kyungsoo begins to say, but Chanyeol wraps an arm around
Kyungsoo’s small shoulders.
“He doesn’t like you,” Chanyeol sticks his tongue out, “He told me-” Chanyeol
promptly shuts up, howling overdramatically in pain as Kyungsoo’s elbow digs
into his ribcage.
“He’s lying,” Kyungsoo says with a laugh and Chanyeol snickers.
Jongin grins at Sehun and then back at his roommates, “We’re going to have a
lot of fun this semester, boys,” he winks suggesting the mischief that they’re
bound to get into and Kyungsoo’s heart pounds with excitement at the idea, “I
can tell.”
                                      ***
When Kyungsoo opens his eyes the next morning, he’s not surprised that he’s
waking up to the sound of Chanyeol snoring softly. Kyungsoo wants to laugh,
because Chanyeol does seem like the type to be loud even in his sleep. He sits
up and rubs his eyes, yawning as he stretches out and cracks his back.
He swings his feet over the side of the springy bed and lands with a thud
against the cold floor before shuffling towards the bathroom. Water runs from
the tap inside and Kyungsoo takes a peek back at Jongin’s bed realizing that he
must be in the shower or something. He knocks his knuckles against the door a
few times until Jongin swings the door open, greeting Kyungsoo with wet hair, a
toothbrush hanging from his mouth and nothing on but a pair of boxers.
“Uh,” Kyungsoo speaks, but his throat is still a bit itchy from sleep,
“Morning?”
Jongin snorts and spits his toothpaste out into the sink, “Morning,” he says
then rinses out his mouth, “Is Chanyeol up yet?”
Kyungsoo takes a quick look back to Chanyeol’s bed around the corner of the
narrow entrance way to their room and finds that Chanyeol has shifted
positions. He’s now starfishing across the bed, his hair sticking up in
different directions and mouth still open as he snores. Kyungsoo looks back at
Jongin with a smile on his face before shaking his head.
Jongin grins, “He’d sleep forever if he could.”
Kyungsoo chuckles quietly into his hand then lets himself into the bathroom, “I
really need to pee.” he says and Jongin laughs, gesturing to the urinal in the
corner.
“Go on then, I won’t stop you.”
Jongin leaves Kyungsoo to the bathroom and Kyungsoo figures he’ll take a quick
shower before they have to leave for the opening ceremony of Drag Day… The
first day of classes… Whatever. Kyungsoo pulls back the curtain to the shower
and finds that it’s still wet from when Jongin used it earlier. He sighs and
slips into the stall, shedding his clothes and tossing it to the floor, praying
that it lands in a dry spot.
The shower is as loud as it sounded from the outside of the door and Kyungsoo
can barely hear himself think as he lets the warm water stream pour down over
him. It’s relaxing and the heat could very well lull him back to sleep if he
weren’t careful. He realizes it’s best to be quick, so he lathers up his hair
and rinses it out before shutting off the tap.
Reaching out for a towel he knows is hanging on the rack just outside, he’s met
with cold air from the bathroom and… Skin. He’s touching warm skin. This is not
his towel.
Kyungsoo shrieks the exact same time that the person outside of the stall
shrieks. He’s not expecting that and he pulls back the curtain slightly to find
that Chanyeol is standing right there in front of him with only a towel around
his waist. Kyungsoo’s towel.
“Chanyeol!” Kyungsoo yells, “What are you doing in here?!”
“I- I swear,” Chanyeol stutters, “I thought you were Jongin.”
Kyungsoo’s cheeks grow red, “You come in here while Jongin showers? Are you a
pervert?”
Chanyeol’s face burns with embarrassment, “N-No!” he takes a deep breath,
“We’re just- We’re close, so it doesn’t bother us. We’re like brother,
brothers,” Chanyeol insists, but he can’t even look Kyungsoo in the eye.
“I’m just teasing,” Kyungsoo says in a quiet voice, “Chanyeol, you’re wearing
my towel…”
“W-What?” Chanyeol looks down and sucks in a sharp breath - this towel is very
red and his own towels are very white, “I didn’t even notice this wasn’t mine…”
Kyungsoo is starting to get cold standing there nude in the shower stall with
the curtain pulled back slightly. Chanyeol seemed to have left the door open
when he came into the bathroom and stole Kyungsoo’s towel from him.
“Could you maybe…” Kyungsoo clears his throat and tries not to look at the
sharp lines of Chanyeol’s torso when he stares down at his towel, “Get me a
towel too…? Please?”
Chanyeol’s eyes go impossibly wide and he looks at Kyungsoo apologetically, “Of
course! You can use one of mine!” he exclaims as he runs out of the bathroom,
returning moments later with a large, fluffy white towel.
Kyungsoo reaches out for it and Chanyeol hurriedly gives it to him, turning
away from the shower curtain once it slips closed. Kyungsoo sighs and dried off
the water left clinging to him and then wraps the towel around his hips before
taking a step out of the stall, praying to God that he doesn’t misstep and slip
on the floor.
He’s proud that he’s made it onto his two feet, but perhaps it really wasn’t
himself that he should’ve been worried about. Kyungsoo is still dripping water
onto the tiled floor of the bathroom, making it even wetter than when it was
just the water left from Jongin’s shower. So when Chanyeol spins around after
hearing Kyungsoo step out, well then… He slips.
Chanyeol lets out this mortified screech as he falls down, legs flailing and
hands trying to find purchase on something, anything to keep from hitting the
ground. That’s when his hands find Kyungsoo’s waist and it happens in a matter
of seconds. Chanyeol lands on his knees, arms wrapped around Kyungsoo’s legs as
if they could have held him up and Kyungsoo’s towel is now on… The floor…
Kyungsoo screams in horror, scrambling to reach down and pick up his towel in
order to wrap it back around his waist. Chanyeol just sits there on his knees,
arms still awkwardly wrapped around Kyungsoo’s thighs, mouth open in a silent
cry and his eyes wide in shock.
“O-Oh,” Chanyeol begins and he lets go of Kyungsoo, “Oh my God,” he whispers,
trying to get up on his feet a few times, but stumbling in the process and just
landing back down flat on his butt, “I’m so sorry Kyungsoo, I really didn’t
mean it-” he babbles on and on, his face matching the cherry red colour of
Kyungsoo’s towel around Chanyeol’s hips.
Kyungsoo thinks he should make the best of this situation since the two are
going to be roommates for a very long time. He quickly ties Chanyeol’s white
towel around his waist and tries to avoid making eye contact with Chanyeol
until he can come up with a witty reply.
“I thought you said you weren’t a pervert,” Kyungsoo says without missing a
beat, his eyes crinkling with amusement at his own joke.
Chanyeol looks up at Kyungsoo with his jaw hanging open in surprise when he
notices that Kyungsoo is fighting back a smile. The taller, lanky boy begins to
laugh so hard that it brings tears to his eyes. He willingly accepts Kyungsoo’s
help up when a hand is extended to him and bows his head still even as he
stands.
“I am sorry, Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol sighs after a moment of silence.
“It’s okay,” Kyungsoo reassures, but his heart is beating out of his chest
still at the thought of Chanyeol’s face pressing so closely to his… He shivers
slightly and blames it on the cold room, “Accidents happen.”
Chanyeol sniffles and looks back down to where the towel is now hanging around
Kyungsoo’s hips. He looks back at Kyungsoo like he wants to say something,
opening and closing his mouth ungracefully before he shakes his head, seemingly
deciding against it. That’s how they fall into an awkward, silent morning as
they get ready for Drag Day together.
They dress facing away from each other, but Kyungsoo can sense Chanyeol’s eyes
on him every few minutes. Kyungsoo looks over his shoulder and one point to
find that Chanyeol’s eyes are darting away from him and that his face is still
flushed a light pink with probably embarrassment for having pulled Kyungsoo’s
towel down on him. Kyungsoo sighs, fidgeting with his tie until he has it all
straightened away then he turns around and finds that Chanyeol is still
fumbling with his own tie hanging loosely around his neck.
Kyungsoo feels kind of bad, even though it was Chanyeol that had seen him
naked, not the other way around, “It’s okay, you know.”
Chanyeol jumps out of his skin, turning around to look at Kyungsoo with
eyebrows raised and surprised eyes, “What?”
“It’s okay. It was just an accident, Chanyeol. Don’t fret over it.” Kyungsoo
reassures with a smile, “Hurry up with your tie or we’ll be late. You need to
show me where to go,” he teases.
Chanyeol’s shoulders instantly relax and he laughs a deep chuckle booming from
his throat, “Okay, okay, just one more second,” he grins and finishes tying
what could be passable for a tie.
Kyungsoo shakes his head with an amused eye roll, “Alright, lead the way.”
The gym that Jongin had pointed out at the main building is actually rather
large and seems to hold all of the prep students easily. Upon entering,
Kyungsoo instantly sees the flags hanging from the main stage at one end that
reminds of his elementary school days. There’s a podium on the stage a series
of elder men sitting in rows as students enter the gym and find places to sit
among their friends and house colours.
A Placid Blue flag hangs above what Kyungsoo quickly realizes is the seating
area for Arion House. Jongin is sitting near the back with two empty seats next
to him, clearly waiting for his two roommates. Kyungsoo is just glad that
Chanyeol is so tall, because it’s rather simple to get lost among the crowds of
students and Chanyeol sort of sticks out with his stature and bright red hair.
As they walk by Apollo House, a few boys poke fun at Chanyeol’s hair and
Chanyeol reaches out to ruffle the hair of the boy sitting next to the boy who
had been teasing Chanyeol, who Kyungsoo recognizes as Sehun.
Kyungsoo tries to catch up, following closely behind Chanyeol’s heels until
they reach their saved seats. Jongin grins and shifts over one seat so that
Chanyeol and Kyungsoo don’t have to climb over him. Everyone around them seems
to be chattering, but Chanyeol who appeared to be a chatterbox at first seems
to have nothing to say at all. Kyungsoo sighs and leans back in his chair,
taking in his surroundings.
The gym looks much more new compared to the other parts of the campus, with
brightly painted walls and a squeaky clean floor that looks like it was just
put down this morning. It’s not so bad, Kyungsoo thinks, as he shifts in the
cushioned foldable chair, could be worse.
A balding man walks across the stage suddenly, drawing everyone’s attention and
demanding silence with just his presence. Kyungsoo figures out pretty quickly
that this is the headmaster of the boarding school, dressed in a stuffy suit
and wearing thin glasses on the tip of his nose. Kyungsoo tries not to think
about if they would include the glasses as part of his bust or not once he
retires. That is, if he retires - the man looks about eighty or so already.
He’d probably be headmaster until his last, dying breath.
The headmaster clears his throat in the microphone and begins a speech on the
school year, welcoming everyone back, mentioning something about school pride
and so on and so forth. He begins talking about the school houses and their
colours and introducing the departments to freshmen and to transfer students
who had been accepted. Kyungsoo zones in and out, hearing only bits and pieces
of the talk.
He partially listens to the explanations about the school houses and colours
and crests, only managing to get a few simple facts down. That is that Dr. L.
Roman certainly had a large interest in Greek Mythology and the Classics.
Mostly he doesn’t listen, because he thinks if he does, he’ll start thinking of
everything that Chanyeol said last night about it and then start laughing out
loud.
Once the headmasters finally let the students go free, Kyungsoo looks up at
Chanyeol who still appears to be a bit stiff. There’s been this tension between
the two and Kyungsoo would rather if it just went away. He wants more than
anything to put this awkwardness behind them so they can continue to grow as
friends, so he does the best thing he thinks Chanyeol will respond well to.
Humour.
“Hey,” Kyungsoo calls, “I thought you said that we call it Drag Day because we
have to drag ourselves here.”
Chanyeol looks down at Kyungsoo a little curiously, Jongin leans over to look
too, “Yeah,” he confirms before blinking rapidly in confusion.
“Not because they drag this day out as long as they possibly can?” Kyungsoo
asks all serious, but Chanyeol seems to get that it’s a joke, Kyungsoo figures,
especially when Chanyeol bursts into laughter.
Jongin laughs too, sputtering when he can’t breathe because Kyungsoo may have
just added to an age old tradition at the school. Kyungsoo doesn’t care much
about his stupid legacy at the school, he’s just happy to see that Chanyeol has
relaxed enough now that he can put his hand on Kyungsoo’s shoulder for balance
as he chuckles. He finally thinks that they’ve got the events of this morning
put behind them.
“Did you get your schedule yet, Soo?” Jongin asks, looking over Kyungsoo’s
shoulder to find that Kyungsoo is in fact checking for his schedule now on his
phone.
“I think so,” He says, clicking on the attachment of his class registration
email, “Got it.”
“Do we have any classes together?” Chanyeol asks, looking down at Kyungsoo’s
phone and holding his out next to Kyungsoo’s in order to compare.
“Oh,” Kyungsoo says looking back and forth between the screens, “We do. We have
a lot of classes together,” he says before looking up at Chanyeol, “Have you
been stalking me?”
The tips of Chanyeol’s ears turn red at the accusation, but he laughs anyway,
“Why would I stalk someone like you?”
Jongin rolls his eyes and pulls Kyungsoo’s phone from his hands, “How are you
both in almost all of the same classes this semester? Kyungsoo and I are only
in one- no, two. Two classes out of seven and we’re even in the same
department.”
Chanyeol sticks his tongue out at Jongin, “We have five classes together,” he
says, like it’s a competition who gets to be in class with Kyungsoo most.
Kyungsoo laughs and steals his phone back from Jongin, “That means there’s at
least one class where I don’t know anyone at all.”
“Which one?” Jongin and Chanyeol ask in unison.
“Shakespearean literature-” Kyungsoo stops mid-sentence as he notices the looks
that Jongin and Chanyeol are giving him, “What?”
“You’re taking a Lit course?” Chanyeol makes a weird face, “Why?”
“I can’t?” Kyungsoo asks, concerned he may have done something wrong.
“It’s not that you can’t,” Jongin explains, “It’s just that Arion House and
Virgil House don’t get along very well.”
“What?” Kyungsoo laughs, “That’s stupid. Just because we’re in different
departments?”
“It’s the classic ‘our-house-is-better-than-yours’ argument,” Chanyeol says
looking off to see if he can spot any students wearing that god-awful Mock
Orange uniform with it’s fox crest, “There,” he says as he points in the
direction of a few, “That’s Jongdae and Junmyeon. They’re the only saving grace
about that House.”
As if on cue, the two boys Chanyeol is pointing at look over their way. One of
them obviously rolls his eyes and calls out to Chanyeol, calling him by a
profane name that makes Jongin laugh out loud. The other one swats at him,
seemingly chastising the boy as they begin to walk towards the trio together.
Kyungsoo has to admit that the Mock Orange with the fox crest looks much less
ridiculous than their own as the two boys come closer.
“Brat,” Chanyeol greets the one who had yelled at him, instantly putting him in
a headlock, “What kind of student are you?”
The one in the headlock smacks Chanyeol randomly, “Let go, punk.”
“Jongdae,” the other one sighs in exasperation, “You really deserved what was
coming to you.”
Chanyeol only lets him go after the boy, Jongdae, manages to sink his teeth
into his arm.
“Hyung,” Jongdae whines, “I can’t believe you said I deserved it.”
“You did,” Chanyeol says sticking his tongue out and that earns him a scolding
smack on the shoulder from the other one who Kyungsoo assumes is Junmyeon.
“You two are children, honestly,” Junmyeon says with an eye roll, “I’m sorry we
had to meet this way,” he turns his attention to Kyungsoo all of a sudden,
“You’re new, right?”
Kyungsoo nods, “I am. I’m Kyungsoo,” he says stretching out his hand for a
handshake and then Jongin nudges him, “Of Arion House,” he adds in mild
annoyance.
Junmyeon laughs and accepts Kyungsoo’s hand, “Kim Junmyeon,” he says, “I’m the
president of Virgil House.”
“And I’m his trusty sidekick, Jongdae,” the one who has been bickering with
Chanyeol this whole time pipes up.
Chanyeol slings his arm around Junmyeon and points at Kyungsoo, “This kid here
signed up for a Lit course.”
Junmyeon raises an eyebrow, “You did? I can’t remember the last time we had
someone from Arion House take a Literature course… Which one are you registered
for?”
“Shakespearean Literature,” Kyungsoo says with an awkward smile, “Should I drop
out while I’m ahead?” he asks with a laugh, but he’s being kind of serious.
Junmyeon laughs and shakes his head, “No, no,” he says, “Don’t let these idiots
scare you. There’s no real animosity between our Houses. There used to be years
ago when there was a House Cup Tournament, but that’s long since been removed
from practice.”
Kyungsoo breathes a sigh of relief, jabbing Jongin with his elbow since he’s
the closest one to him, “You guys had me scared shitless.” he blurts and
Junmyeon actually laughs, loudly, at that.
Jongdae looks at Junmyeon with his eyebrows furrowed, “You never laugh when I
curse.”
Junmyeon pats Jongdae’s shoulder, but otherwise ignores his whining, “What time
slot is your course in?”
“It’s at 2:30,” Kyungsoo says and Jongdae turns to look at him with a kittenish
grin.
“We’re in the same class,” he smirks suggestively like he’s about to cause
trouble and he probably would if it weren’t for Junmyeon tugging on his ear.
“We all are,” Junmyeon says, “I’ll save you a seat in class.”
“What about me?” Jongdae pouts and Junmyeon sighs.
“What about you?” he counters and Jongdae frowns.
Their bickering persists, but it’s all in good fun. Chanyeol and Kyungsoo end
up looking at each other and laughing together more often than not and Kyungsoo
is glad that everything is behind them now. Especially since they’re going to
be taking all of these classes together. Kyungsoo’s junior year has seemingly
gotten back on track.
Chanyeol seems to have completely forgotten about the whole ordeal and he
obviously never mentioned it to Jongin and so Kyungsoo feels like they’re both
able to brush it off as an accident. Chanyeol doesn’t bring it up again and
Kyungsoo chooses not to mention it. Waking up now at the same time with an
alarm between their beds has left little to no room for any more awkward
encounters between them in the bathroom anyway.
Within the month, Kyungsoo feels like he’s used to campus life at the boarding
school already. He’s gotten his schedule memorized and knows the campus
buildings inside and out already, not even really needing to fall into step
with Chanyeol or Jongin when he leaves for class. It’s simply out of their
blossoming friendship that Kyungsoo waits in the mornings for Chanyeol and
Jongin when classes start for the morning.
Even his literature course is going well - sitting with Junmyeon and Jongdae is
proving to be an excellent perk since they’re both friendly enough and they
know most of Shakespeare's works inside and out. Kyungsoo figures that this
school year couldn’t get any better than it is right now. He’s got friends,
he’s got great classes and professors, plus he’s finally getting a specialized
focus in the subject he wants to pursue in university.
Everything is going well for Kyungsoo and he doesn’t think of anything being
able to change that. Except something does. It changes everything for Kyungsoo
and it shouldn’t really… But it does anyway and he starts to question every
aspect he thought he had already known about himself.
“Having this Music Studio course together is probably the best thing that
could’ve happened to me,” Chanyeol sighs when Kyungsoo slips into the desk next
to his own, “I can’t imagine having to be paired up with someone else.”
Kyungsoo smiles, lips turning into a little heart shape when he does, “Being
paired with you isn’t so bad.”
Chanyeol smirks, “Admit it, you like me better than Jongin.”
Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, “I’m not picking between my roommates.”
“I’ll take that as a yes.” Chanyeol decides leaning back in his chair and
crossing his arms behind his head, “I knew it.”
“Whatever you think, Yeol,” Kyungsoo says dismissively, but he is glad that
Chanyeol is his partner for the studio regardless.
“Alright, students, settle down,” comes the professor’s voice at the front of
the class, “For your big end of the year project, I am expecting for you to
have produced a song for the class. You will have the studio all to yourselves
for six hours during the week, plus whenever your group signs it out on the
weekends.” he explains and then picks up two silly looking silk top hats.
“That should give you enough time to create at least two to three minutes of a
track based on the genre and theme you’re about to pull from these hats. In one
we have genres and in the other, themes,” he explains as he shakes the hats
making the small sheets of paper within rustle, “This will determine your fate.
No complaining either and no second choices. What you get is what you get.
That’s life, boys.” the professor says with a sigh, walking around the room and
letting each student in their pairs pull a slip of paper from the hats.
When the hats stops in front of Kyungsoo’s face, Chanyeol’s eager hand reaches
out first, dipping into one for their genre. He rustles the papers loudly for
an added effect, grinning at Kyungsoo as he finally takes a slip out between
his long fingers. Chanyeol opens it in front of Kyungsoo’s face and they’re
both pleased to see that they’ve gained Acoustic Music as their genre.
The professor waits impatiently for Kyungsoo to pick the theme, foot tapping
rhythmically on the ground. Kyungsoo is slightly more nervous than Chanyeol had
been, simply diving in without a care. Kyungsoo is more calculated than that
and he hates, absolutely despises, leaving things up to random chance. But if
Chanyeol can be confident in it, then he should be too, right?
Kyungsoo pulls out a slip of paper and the professor moves down the aisle of
chatty students, leaving Kyungsoo to stare at the white strip in his
nervousness. Chanyeol is anxiously waiting to the side, legs bouncing with the
anticipation to find out what kind of song they’ll be writing. When Kyungsoo
opens the slip, he nearly drops it, making a face of displeasure and then
looking back at Chanyeol with a weird expression.
“What is it?” Chanyeol asks excitedly.
“Love Song,” Kyungsoo reads and Chanyeol’s face falls.
“No way,” he mutters, “Let me see that.” he snatches the sheet from Kyungsoo
and groans when he reads it out loud.
Their professor’s head snaps in their direction and he shouts, “No
complaining!” before he makes two more unlucky students decide their fate.
As Chanyeol and Kyungsoo walk together back to Gladiator Boulevard Kyungsoo
notices how October has begun to change the look of the campus. The trees are
an array of hues of red, yellow and orange and the wind has become slightly
chillier. Leaves crunch under their feet as they walk together, talking about
chords for their song and Kyungsoo bobs his head in agreement with everything
Chanyeol says. He likes that he’s got an agreeable partner in Chanyeol and
Chanyeol quite likes that he’s got a smart partner in Kyungsoo.
On their way back, Chanyeol realizes he’s left something at the main building.
He promises to meet up with Kyungsoo in their room as soon as possible once
he’s found his notebook so they can talk about their direction of their song.
Kyungsoo shrugs him off and tells him to take his time, but Chanyeol is already
bolting across the campus, stumbling over his own long legs.
Kyungsoo sighs to himself with a small smile, wondering how Chanyeol can even
function with those long limbs of his before turning back to the concrete
pathway that leads to the dormitories. It’s pretty quiet around the street, but
Kyungsoo realizes that it’s still pretty early in the day and he’s just lucky
that his classes end early on Fridays this term.
When he lets himself into the dormitory and makes his way to his room, he’s
positive he can hear voices. He’s not sure who else is done early on Fridays,
but considering the closer he gets to his dorm room, he’s positive it can only
be Jongin. Except he can hear a second voice too, muffled beyond the door. He
doesn’t think much of it as he swipes his ID badge and lets himself. He’s
expecting to find Jongin and a friend sitting around after a long day of
classes, but that is definitely not what greets Kyungsoo.
What he’s not expecting is Jongin’s friend Sehun to be sprawled across Jongin’s
bed, moaning as he bites down on his tie. Sehun’s uniform shirt is undone
mostly and slipping off of his shoulder, and his pants are halfway down his
thighs. Jongin is there too, straddling one of Sehun’s legs as he works his
hand inside of Sehun’s boxers and bites against Sehun’s collarbone.
Kyungsoo gapes at the sight and makes a high pitched squeaking noise in his
attempt to excuse himself from the room or maybe apologize, before everything
seemingly goes downhill. Both Jongin and Sehun stop everything suddenly, heads
snapping in the direction of the door to find Kyungsoo trying to turn the
doorknob to get out. Sehun yelps and pushes Jongin off of him and Kyungsoo
makes a bolt for the hallway, finally feeling the heat in his face at the
embarrassment of whatever the fuck he just saw.
He’s barely in the hall for a few seconds when he hears the dorm room door open
and close quickly. It’s Jongin standing behind him, looking relatively panicked
despite how cool he’s trying to act right now. To Kyungsoo, he sort of looks
like a kid who’s been caught doing something wrong, but he pulls off acting
rather suavely despite Kyungsoo having just walked in on him doing, uh- stuff.
“I’m sorry,” Kyungsoo squeaks, not expecting that he would have been the first
to say anything at all.
“It’s fine,” Jongin says, brushing his shaking fingers back through his messy
hair. They fall silent and then Jongin finally collects himself, “You know… We
all do it.”
Kyungsoo’s mouth goes dry, “W-What?” he blinks, “Do what?”
Jongin shakes his head as he tries to feign a laugh, “You know,” he says
suggestively, pointing back at the door to their room, “That.”
Kyungsoo thinks for a moment about Jongin’s hands down Sehun’s pants and nearly
chokes on his spit, “Oh.”
“You see,” Jongin begins to explain, his voice wavering only slightly, “There’s
not… Not a lot of girls around. In fact, there’s none around for miles, ya
know? So we all do it, it’s not a big deal. We just- We pretend with each
other. It’s nothing really. Just to take off the edge, right? Since we’re all
guys, it doesn’t mean anything so it’s okay.”
Kyungsoo nods along with Jongin who sounds like he’s trying to convince himself
more than Kyungsoo, “Okay.”
“It’s better than just doing it by yourself,” Jongin coughs awkwardly, “You
won’t tell any of the headmasters though, right?”
Kyungsoo shakes his head, disbelief settling on his mind, “I won’t.”
“Good,” Jongin visibly relaxes and smiles at Kyungsoo, “They might get the
wrong idea.”
Kyungsoo doesn’t think too much about Sehun and Jongin together anyway, but
instead he feels sick to his stomach. Not because he's accidentally seen Sehun
and Jongin getting each other off, but because when Jongin said that everyone
does it, that it’s not a big deal, Kyungsoo had thought of someone.
Instead of working on their project that night, Kyungsoo tells Chanyeol he’s
feeling sick and decides to go to bed early. Chanyeol worries over him, of
course, but Kyungsoo assures him that he’s fine and only swats Chanyeol’s hand
away when he tries to touch him to check his temperature. Jongin doesn’t return
to their dorm until way later in the night when he thinks everyone else is
asleep, but Kyungsoo can’t sleep at all. And when he does finally fall asleeps,
he starts to dream about… Things he probably shouldn’t be dreaming about.
When Kyungsoo wakes up the next morning, he’s hard in his boxers and he can’t
look at Chanyeol at all. Somehow, things have begun to go south for Kyungsoo
real fast. Literally.
                                      ***
Kyungsoo doesn’t treat Jongin any differently after the incident and Jongin
doesn’t mention anything about it again. Even Sehun seems to have moved beyond
it after a few days. That’s not at all what Kyungsoo is dwelling on though,
Sehun and Jongin touching that is. Instead, his thoughts wander to big hands
clasping his thighs and bright eyes looking up at him from beneath red bangs.
Kyungsoo shivers and feels sick again.
“Hey,” Chanyeol calls out to Kyungsoo, waving a hand in front of his face,
“Earth to Soo! Did you hear anything I just said?”
Kyungsoo looks at Chanyeol questioningly, his wide eyes very blank, “What?”
Chanyeol sighs and pokes Kyungsoo’s nose, “I said Jongin is spending the
weekend in Apollo House since Sehun’s roommate, Yixing, is going to be visiting
relatives.”
“Oh,” Kyungsoo breathes, thinking of Jongin and Sehun disheveled on Jongin’s
bed.
“We get the dorm room to ourselves, so we can work out our lyrics and stuff
this weekend, unless you have other plans?” Chanyeol teases and Kyungsoo
shrugs.
“You know I don’t have plans,” he sighs and Chanyeol chuckles, patting
Kyungsoo’s head.
“Duh,” Chanyeol grins, “Come on then, let’s get started! It could be fun.”
Kyungsoo thinks that there’s nothing fun about sitting in their room while
writing acoustic love songs together. They’re both boys… How could this be fun?
Chanyeol flops back onto his bed and stretches out tiredly on Saturday evening.
They’ve been working all day long now and have gotten just about nothing done
for their track. Chanyeol keeps picking up his guitar and strumming a few
chords, writing them down in scribbles in his notebook. Kyungsoo has been
sitting on his own bed, legs crossed and a pencil sticking out of his mouth as
he tries to formulate some kind of lyrical masterpiece.
“This is so hard,” Chanyeol groans and he looks over at Kyungsoo with round
puppy eyes, “Want to switch?”
Kyungsoo spares Chanyeol and glance and snorts at the nonsensical idea, “No
thanks.”
Chanyeol pouts and picks his guitar back up, strumming again and humming
something about Kyungsoo being the worst roommate ever. Then Kyungsoo’s pillow
hits him right in the middle of his face, leaving Kyungsoo doubling over in
laughter when Chanyeol lets out an ‘oof!’
“I can’t believe you’re abusing me,” Chanyeol whines.
“I can’t believe you’re whining so much. This was your idea for our weekend,”
Kyungsoo points out and Chanyeol scrunches up his face, because he knows
Kyungsoo is right.
“Whatever,” he mumbles, “We just need some inspiration.”
Kyungsoo shifts uncomfortably, keeping his eyes glued onto his notebook and
ignoring that comment. Chanyeol falls silent again and Kyungsoo tries really
hard to focus on the lyrics that won’t come to him. He can hear Chanyeol
placing his guitar back down on its stand and then he hears Chanyeol’s bed
creak under his shifting weight. Kyungsoo sighs in irritation, but he’s caught
off guard when Chanyeol grabs his wrists and pins him onto the bed.
“Wh-What are you doing?” Kyungsoo sputters out, his heart rate increasing to an
erratic pace, “Get off.”
Chanyeol leans down and touches his nose off of Kyungsoo’s, “Do you feel
anything?”
Kyungsoo guffaws and tries to push Chanyeol off of himself, “I feel your
weight.” he groans in annoyance and Chanyeol sits back, laughing loudly before
everything falls silent once again.
It’s an accident, really, Kyungsoo thinks.
He never expected that this would happen between them, but maybe he should have
seen it coming. They were comfortable around each other, having instantly
become best friends and Kyungsoo guesses this is what friends are for at this
academy. Considering Jongin and Sehun, Kyungsoo shouldn’t be at all surprised
when Chanyeol rolls on top of him again jokingly, but instead their hips press
together unexpectedly.
“G-Get off,” Kyungsoo mumbles, blushing bright red.
“I- I- W-Wait,” Chanyeol stutters, but he loses his balance and his hips roll
right back into Kyungsoo’s.
It’s Chanyeol who moans first and blushes bright red when he does. Kyungsoo
swears that Chanyeol is about to open his mouth to apologize, but he shifts
instead and Kyungsoo’s quickly rising boner presses against Chanyeol’s thigh
causing him to whimper. That’s sort of how it starts, the two of them staring
at each other, uncertainty in their eyes, as they begin grinding against one
another, like they’re not really sure if this is okay.
Jongin’s words flash through Kyungsoo’s mind, that it’s not a big deal,
everyone does it…
Kyungsoo licks his lips and spreads his legs beneath Chanyeol so that their
growing erections are pressing together through their pants. Chanyeol flushes
bright red and buries his face into Kyungsoo’s neck, moaning loudly when
Kyungsoo wraps his legs around his waist so they can hump easier. Kyungsoo
moans too, not thinking of anything at all when he rolls his hips up into
Chanyeol’s at the same moment that Chanyeol pushes his down.
“S-Soo,” Chanyeol gasps and Kyungsoo moans in response.
Chanyeol’s arms wrap even tighter around Kyungsoo’s midsection as he thrusts
against the hardness of Kyungsoo’s dick. They both moan lowly in each other’s
ears, trying their best to be as quiet as possible so no one finds them
enjoying themselves. The bed creaks beneath them and the headboard gently
whacks against the wall with every thrust the two make.
Kyungsoo bites into his bottom lip to keep himself from moaning too loudly as
Chanyeol grinds into him, harder this time. He’s never… Never had someone else
touch him before like this. He’s touched himself of course, but someone else
holding him, feeling another person against him, it’s so much… Better. It feels
so good, too good.
“Y-Yeol- Ah- Ah-” Kyungsoo pants heavily into Chanyeol’s ear, eyes squeezing
shut tight at the pleasure.
When Chanyeol’s hands find their way to Kyungsoo’s ass and he squeezes the
cheeks obscenely, Kyungsoo shudders into his orgasm. He throws his head back,
moaning unabashedly as he cums in his pants and Chanyeol watches through hooded
eyes and mouth slack as he grinds in a little more and then he cums too.
Chanyeol’s body slumps forward on top of Kyungsoo’s and they’re left panting
into each other’s ears. In the heavy silence, Kyungsoo realizes what he’s just
done with Chanyeol, but he’s not left to think about that for too long.
He’s not expecting the kiss that follows his amazing orgasm, but when
Chanyeol’s lips press against his own almost shyly, he’s not disgusted by it.
Instead, he kisses back and Chanyeol makes this really pleased noise that
sounds hella cute to Kyungsoo. So cute, in fact, that Kyungsoo kisses him
again, hoping to hear it, but this time Chanyeol whines in the back of his
throat and that sound is even cuter.
Chanyeol wraps his arms around Kyungsoo, flipping them around so that the
younger is on top of him in hopes of kissing easier. Chanyeol’s mouth opens
slightly against Kyungsoo’s plush lips, inviting him in, surprising both of
them, but neither stops the kisses. Kyungsoo takes the opportunity to lick
Chanyeol’s lips, lick into his mouth tentatively and taste him. Kyungsoo is
pleasantly surprised to find that Chanyeol’s lips, his tongue, his mouth, it
all tastes nice. He tastes like the coffee he drank earlier, but Kyungsoo would
be lying to say that he didn’t enjoy every bit of it.
A whimper escapes Chanyeol’s mouth as Kyungsoo sucks his bottom lip between his
own lips, letting it go with a pop. Chanyeol pulls away and grins sheepishly at
Kyungsoo who smiles back nervously, thinking too much about what just happened
between them. But Chanyeol doesn’t seem to think much of it, so maybe he
shouldn’t either. Except he can’t stop thinking about it, not with Chanyeol
holding him in his arms still as they drift off to sleep.
Kyungsoo thinks too much about nothing at all.
They do not talk about it. When Kyungsoo wakes up the next morning and finds
that Chanyeol has moved from his bed and into the bathroom, he resolves with
himself not to say a single word about it. They were both stressed out, that’s
all, and so they used each other to relieve themselves, take some strain off.
That’s what Jongin and Sehun do so that’s all that Kyungsoo and Chanyeol had
done last night.
It’s a one time thing, Kyungsoo determines. As Chanyeol exits the bathroom,
they both can’t even make eye contact, but it’s Chanyeol who breaks down first.
He smiles bright like he usually does, despite looking a bit tense and he
reaches out to nudge Kyungsoo’s leg with the tip of his foot.
“Rise and shine,” Chanyeol calls, “You’re usually awake before I am, what
gives?”
Kyungsoo shrugs, “It’s Sunday, I’m allowed to be lazy.”
Chanyeol sniffles and chuckles as he falls back onto his own bed, “Okay. Let’s
just be lazy today.”
“I’m going to get a shower first,” Kyungsoo says hurriedly and he rushes into
the bathroom, leaving Chanyeol alone on his bed with only his thoughts for
company.
They spend the day in silence. Chanyeol sticks his headphones into his laptop
and watches videos on guitar technique while Kyungsoo decides to do some
pressing literature homework. And by pressing, he means it’s due in about a
week, but he’s pressed to do anything at all to make it look like he’s too busy
to chat. Kyungsoo doesn’t want to talk about IT.
Jongin’s return to their dorm is almost a sigh of relief and a breath of fresh
air for Kyungsoo. When he walks through the door, Chanyeol is, not
surprisingly, the first one to lunge off of his bed and greet him. It doesn’t
throw Jongin off to have Chanyeol all over him, but Kyungsoo knows that
Chanyeol must feel as relieved as he does to have another person in the room to
fill the awkwardness.
“Did someone die?” Jongin asks jokingly when Chanyeol and Kyungsoo refuse to
look at each other for more than a minute.
“No,” Chanyeol says - he sounds confused.
Kyungsoo tries not to grin, because Chanyeol is exceptionally cute when he’s
confused, “Long weekend.” he explains and Jongin nods in understanding.
“The music project, right?” Jongin asks, shaking his head, “My partner and I
got R&B for our genre and breakups for our theme,” he sounds rotted, “We don’t
know what the hell we’re doing. What did you two get again?”
“Acoustic and lo-” Chanyeol pauses and takes a glance at Kyungsoo from the
corner of his eye, “Love song.” he finishes, looking away.
Jongin laughs and waves his hand around dismissively, “Love song, right, right.
Good luck with that, boys.”
Kyungsoo thinks that they’re going to need a lot more than just luck to get
through this assignment. He has to drag himself through the week and he wonders
why they don’t call every day Drag Day around here. Or maybe it’s just him,
because he’s had a lot on his mind recently - namely Chanyeol.
“I heard about you and Chanyeol,” Jongdae says as he walks into their Lit
class.
Wait, what the fuck.
Kyungsoo’s heart comes up in his throat and his body goes absolutely rigid - he
feels caught, “W-What?”
Jongdae raises his eyebrows curiously, “Relax, Soo. It’s not that bad. Picking
love song as your theme.”
Kyungsoo’s shoulders relax and he breathes out in reprieve, “Right,” he
confirms.
Obviously, Kyungsoo shouldn’t be so worried over this. Who would’ve told
Jongdae about IT anyway? Chanyeol doesn’t seem to walk to talk about it anymore
than Kyungsoo does. He needs to relax, but he can’t, because it’s always on his
mind now. Chanyeol’s warm breath, his big hands, his soft lips- Shit. Kyungsoo
thinks he might be very sex deprived if this is what his thoughts have come
down to.
“Could be worse,” Jongdae says with a laugh, startling Kyungsoo from his
thoughts, “You could’ve pulled breakups like Jongin did.”
“Could’ve been country,” Junmyeon says, taking his seat across from Kyungsoo,
“Country love songs are the worst.”
Kyungsoo forces out a chuckle, “That’s true.”
Except that Kyungsoo doesn’t think that there’s anything worse than knowing
that he has to spend this weekend in the booked music studio with Chanyeol.
They need to start recording chords and maybe get the basis of their song down,
but Kyungsoo is dreading being confined to a small space with Chanyeol for a
whole two hours. They’re going to be up close and personal… Again.
“Hey,” Chanyeol calls out as he approaches the studio booth.
Kyungsoo has only ever been here during the weekdays when they were forced to
during their free time between classes. He’s usually in his school uniform on
those days and normally back at the dorms on the weekends, he only wears
joggers and t-shirts. Today, he’s wearing actual clothes. Black jeans, a black
long sleeve shirt, a black baseball cap, black everything.
But Chanyeol, he comes around the corner of the hall looking like the epitome
of sunshine and rainbows. His hair is bright red still, regardless of it
growing out a bit to reveal his natural black hair, and he’s wearing a pastel
pink sweatshirt over a white button up. To tie it all together, he’s got on a
pair of pale blue jeans with the knees ripped out and white converse laceups.
Suddenly, Kyungsoo feels severely understated.
“Who’s funeral?” Chanyeol asks, gesturing to Kyungsoo’s choice of all black
attire.
Mine, Kyungsoo thinks.
“Our grade’s.” Kyungsoo says, instead, making Chanyeol’s eyes twinkle with
amusement.
Chanyeol unlocks the door to the music studio with the golden key he picked up
from the secretary down the hall and lets Kyungsoo in first, holding the heavy
door open before letting it go so that it slams shut behind them. Kyungsoo
breathes in the musty scent of the studio. All of the dials and blinking lights
look like they’re from the earliest radio recording period in history and, for
all he knows, they might very well be. Still, there’s something quaint about
the studio that he likes.
The actual recording booth is much smaller, with its soundproof that looks like
it might be from the 70’s lining the walls. It looks hideous, but they have to
make do with what they’re given. Which means using creaky, broken stools and
playing across the ripped leather couches as they brainstorm together.
Silence befalls them like it has been for the last week since IT happened and
Kyungsoo isn’t sure how to fill the gaps. Sure, they could just get right down
to business and talk about the project only, but they’re supposed to be
friends. This isn’t going to work if they can’t get over what happened between
them. The incident was just an accident so he can’t figure out why it won’t
just go away so they can do their work.
“Are you mad at me?” Chanyeol asks, his voice as quiet as a mouse, which is
unusual for Chanyeol.
Kyungsoo looks up at Chanyeol surprised with wide, wide eyes, “No.”
“Oh,” Chanyeol looks back down at his hands resting on his lap, “It’s just that
ever since… What happened. Seems like you’re giving me the cold shoulder. I’m
sorry for what… What we did.” he says sadly and Kyungsoo’s heart feels like
it’s going to crack.
“It’s okay,” Kyungsoo says, but Chanyeol’s shoulders sag making him appear even
more sad and Kyungsoo realizes the implication, like he’s being dismissive of
Chanyeol’s feelings, “I mean, what happened between us. It’s okay. You don’t
have to apologize.”
“What do you mean it’s okay…?” Chanyeol mumbles, but he still refuses to look
up.
“I mean, what happened. It’s okay….” he whispers, licking his lips as his mouth
begins to feel dry, “It’s okay to do those things, right?”
Everyone does it.
Chanyeol’s gaze suddenly returns to Kyungsoo’s. His expression is completely
unreadable, until he throws himself across the arm of the couch Kyungsoo is
sitting on and reaches out to pull Kyungsoo into a hug. The pad of paper and
pencil Kyungsoo had been holding fall to the floor, barely making a sound
against the gross, navy blue carpeting.
“D-Do you mean it?” Chanyeol asks, holding Kyungsoo against his chest.
Kyungsoo can hear the rapid beating of Chanyeol’s heart against his ear, “Yes,”
he begins to say, “I mean, if Jong-” his words became muffled as Chanyeol’s
lips found his own, kissing hungrily and Kyungsoo, he just decides to go with
it.
It’s okay, everyone does it, so it’s okay.
They spend the rest of their hours in the studio on the couch. Chanyeol’s body
pressing Kyungsoo into the uncomfortable cushions and kissing him, exploring
his mouth and shaking hands exploring his body in gently caresses over his
clothes. Kyungsoo doesn’t think this time, he just let’s Chanyeol hold him
while he kisses back and pulls Chanyeol closer to him on instinct. The only
reason they finally pull away from each other is because Chanyeol’s phone alarm
goes off, frightening them both.
Kyungsoo’s lips are red and swollen from the kissing and Chanyeol looks at him
sheepishly. Chanyeol is in a similar state with shining, pink lips and messy
hair sticking in random directions. Kyungsoo can only imagine how messy his
hair must look, but he thankfully has a baseball cap he can stick directly back
on his head once he finds it.
“Sorry if I- Uh- If I was too rough,” Chanyeol says quietly as they walk back
towards their House.
Kyungsoo’s cheeks are still rosy from their makeout session, “You weren’t,” he
says quickly, not just to reassure, but also because, if anything, he felt like
Chanyeol could have been a bit rougher. He tries not to groan as his own
thoughts betray him.
Late at night, Chanyeol slips into Kyungsoo’s bed, wrapping his long arms
around his midsection and snuggling into him from behind. Kyungsoo doesn’t make
anything of it, because Chanyeol whispers in his ear that he’s lonely, he’s
homesick, he wants to cuddle. And it’s just want friends do here, after all,
they’ve already kissed and fooled around, what’s a bit of cuddling between them
now?
If Jongin notices that Chanyeol is always waking up in Kyungsoo’s bed and
sneaking back into his own loudly around 6:30 in the morning, then he does a
good job of pretending like he can’t hear Chanyeol stubbing his toe or hitting
his knees off of his bed frame. Had this arrangement been up to Kyungsoo, he
simply would’ve just pushed their beds together long ago, because Chanyeol
takes up a lot of space on the single bed. But it’s not up to him and the fear
of being caught during surprise dorm inspections is enough to keep Kyungsoo
from actually doing it.
No one says anything about it. About the kissing, the discreet hand holding and
the occasional messing around under the covers after a particularly long week
in class. Besides, Kyungsoo feels it has somehow helped their friendship grow
and they’re able to move beyond the awkward stage, having found themselves in a
comfortable mutual understanding. Their project is even coming along better now
that they’ve sorted themselves out, although maybe they haven’t talked about it
much in the first place, but that’s okay too.
At this rate, Kyungsoo has faith that their love song will be finished before
Christmas break even comes. It’s just a matter of writing some decent, cheesy
lyrics to go with the track that Chanyeol and Kyungsoo have expertly put
together in only a few months. Impressive for a couple of high school kids,
really.
Things should be looking up for Kyungsoo. Except they’re not. Because when he
closes his eyes and thinks about the lyrics he’s supposed to be writing, all he
can think of is Chanyeol. He writes that off as love for his best friend on
campus. Yet, he can’t seem to focus on the lyrics. Even when Chanyeol isn’t
around, all that’s on his mind is Chanyeol. This is supposed to be a song about
love, not sexual escapades between two boys.
For some reason, Kyungsoo just can’t get Chanyeol out of his mind. Chanyeol and
his stupid red hair and his stupid lanky body and his stupid, perfect lips and
his stupid, stupid large ears, and his stupid, wonderful smile, and his stupid
pretty face, and his stupid, heartstopping laugh. Kyungsoo realizes that
there’s something wrong here. He shouldn’t be thinking about Chanyeol like this
at all, he should be thinking of him as a girl. Part of Kyungsoo wonders if he
would date Chanyeol if he was a girl. If either of them was a girl, really.
Then Kyungsoo wonders about something else entirely. He wonders about which
pretty girl Chanyeol thinks about whenever he gets in bed with Kyungsoo or if
maybe he pretends that Kyungsoo is a girl. He wonders if Chanyeol has always
seen Kyungsoo as a girl from the beginning or if he’s really just that good at
pretending like Kyungsoo is a girl or is someone else.
Kyungsoo doesn’t think of Chanyeol as a girl when he kisses him. Kyungsoo
doesn’t think of anything except how good it feels and maybe he shouldn’t be
thinking that at all, but Chanyeol’s kisses are the softest. Chanyeol is the
softest and Kyungsoo wishes he could just curl up in his arms sometimes and
just stay there forever.
Only, when Chanyeol kisses him that night, climbing over him and pinning him
onto the bed, much like he had the first time, Kyungsoo comes to the
realization that he’s never thought of Chanyeol as a girl. He’s never thought
of any particular girl either. This is a realization that terrifies him.
Kyungsoo is not thinking about anyone but Chanyeol when he kisses him, because
he likes him. This realization terrifies him even more. Do Kyungsoo likes Park
Chanyeol - the boy he’s currently kissing - and he feels sick to his stomach
knowing that he’s doing these things with the boy he likes. Kyungsoo’s brain
short circuits - the boy he likes. And Chanyeol, well, Kyungsoo figures that
Chanyeol is not kissing Kyungsoo in his mind, not kissing anyone, but some girl
he’s made up in his head. It hurts.
It’s far too overwhelming to realize all of these things, especially when
Chanyeol is holding his face between his large hands so tenderly and kissing
him like he’s made of glass. He’s so startled by the very idea that he pushes
Chanyeol off of himself without a second thought, looking up at the elder’s
surprised, wide eyes in absolute horror. He likes a boy.
“Soo,” Chanyeol whispers, “What’s wrong?”
“I can’t do this,” Kyungsoo blurts and feels his cheeks flush.
“Can’t do what?” Chanyeol asks, his voice sounds small and sad and it hurts
Kyungsoo even more.
“This,” Kyungsoo motions between them, “I can’t pretend that you’re a girl.”
Chanyeol blinks rapidly, “What?” he asks, like he’s not sure what Kyungsoo has
just said.
“I can’t think of girls when I kiss you,” Kyungsoo admits and his heart aches
to say it out loud, to finally voice the feelings he’s now coming to understand
that he’s been trying to hide all this time.
He doesn’t consider that Chanyeol might take that statement the wrong way. He
doesn’t think that Chanyeol feels anything towards him at all so what does it
matter?
“You think about girls when you kiss me?” Chanyeol asks slowly and he sounds
upset, like he’s hurt that Kyungsoo tries to think about girls at all.
Kyungsoo shakes his head, “Isn’t that what you do when you kiss me?”
“No,” Chanyeol worries his bottom lip between his teeth, he looks like he’s
fighting back tears, “I don’t… Don’t think about girls. I- I don’t know.”
Kyungsoo fidgets with his fingers, “That’s what this is, isn’t it? Jongin said
that everyone does it, it’s not a big deal, Chanyeol. We kiss because there’s
no girls around for us to kiss.”
Chanyeol looks heartbroken when Kyungsoo explains what’s happening between
them. Though Kyungsoo is sure that Chanyeol knew that this was why they were
kissing, surely that’s why they were kissing, right? Why else would the kiss?
They’re both boys. Boys don’t kiss other boys.
“Kissing me means nothing to you?” Chanyeol asks, but it’s not a question, it’s
more of a statement that requires confirmation.
“We’re both boys,” Kyungsoo whispers, like that’s supposed to be an answer,
“Boys can’t… Kiss other boys. It’s okay if we pretend, but we can’t do stuff
together if we can’t pretend…”
“Right,” Chanyeol croaks, his voice sounds strangled and Kyungsoo has to look
away to keep him from seeing the tears starting to form in his eyes.
Chanyeol gets into his own bed and they don’t say anything else. Kyungsoo
silently cries himself to sleep.
                                      ***
It should be difficult to avoid each other considering they’re in such a small
room, in the same dormitory, in most of the same classes and working together
on a project. However, Chanyeol makes it look incredibly easy, successfully
avoiding Kyungsoo wherever he goes. The only time Kyungsoo can recall seeing
Chanyeol is late at night when Chanyeol sneaks into their dorm, in class
sitting on opposite ends of the room and when they’re forced into the music
studio together.
Kyungsoo’s head spins whenever he tries to think about how quickly he and
Chanyeol fell out. It doesn’t make sense, because they were so, so close. They
were practically best friends, Kyungsoo pretty well replacing Yifan in
Chanyeol’s books, which is actually a pretty big deal. He just can’t understand
where he went wrong or where any of this went wrong at all. He tries not to
think about it. This fact alone calls for an intervention, because, frankly,
it’s annoying their third roommate.
It’s not a surprise when Jongin decides to take matters into his own hands.
He corners Kyungsoo in their room, looming over him with his height, “What did
you do to Chanyeol?”
Kyungsoo looks surprised, “I didn’t do anything to Chanyeol.”
“Something happened,” Jongin says, “Because he doesn’t smile as much anymore
and he won’t even look you in the eye when he comes into the room. What did you
do, Soo?”
Kyungsoo shakes his head, “I think he got offended when I told him we should
stop… you know.”
“No,” Jongin says, shaking his head and grabbing Kyungsoo’s shoulders, “I don’t
know. If I knew, I wouldn’t be asking. What the hell happened between you two?”
“Well,” Kyungsoo sighs, “We were… Fooling around, okay? You said that everyone
does it though and that it wasn’t a big deal… But it sort of became one…” he
says, embarrassed.
Jongin searches Kyungsoo’s eyes for a moment and realizes that he’s fucked up,
“Kyungsoo,” he sighs in exasperation, “I just said those things, because I was
afraid that you would tell on me… Sehun isn’t my best friend who I fool around
with when there’s no girls around. Sehun is- he’s-“ he pauses for a moment and
takes a deep breath, “My boyfriend. Sehun is my boyfriend.”
For some reason, this doesn’t shock Kyungsoo at all. He’s more surprised by the
fact that he isn’t surprised in the slightest. Jongin’s hands drop from
Kyungsoo’s shoulders, fidgeting instead with his own fingers, Kyungsoo realizes
that this is the same nervousness that he had seen in Jongin the day he caught
him with Sehun. It’s starting to click now - the puzzle pieces are beginning to
fall into place.
“But you’re both boys,” Kyungsoo says, not accusingly, but simply as an
observation.
Jongin nods, “We can’t tell anyone, because bad things happen if the
headmasters find out that you’re a homo. But I love Sehun… I don’t think of
girls when I touch him or kiss him. I think about him.”
This… This is unexpected and it gives Kyungsoo a lot to think about. So
naturally, he and Chanyeol do not talk at all. Even with this new revelation in
his head, that Jongin and Sehun are actually dating. Somehow this confuses him
more, so he keeps to himself for the last few days before the holidays.
With only a few days left to school before Christmas break, Kyungsoo feels like
he should say something. Unfortunately, if there’s anything that Kyungsoo is
talented in, it’s the silent game. He could ignore Chanyeol forever if he had
to, especially if Chanyeol is going to do the same to him. Christmas break
comes quickly and Kyungsoo is the first to leave the campus. Everything goes
unresolved.
Kyungsoo figures that this is for the best, for now anyway. He can’t get his
feelings together let alone try to explain them to Chanyeol. He doesn’t even
want to think about his own feelings so he’s not sure how he can even bring it
up. The break should give him enough time to collect himself, to figure out who
he is and why it is he feels this way.
When Kyungsoo arrives home for Christmas break, he’s greeted by his smiling
mother and his younger sister at the front door of their home. His father is
still on a business trip outside of the country and by the looks of things, he
might not even be there on Christmas day. That doesn’t surprise him in the
slightest, he can’t even remember the last time his father was there during the
holidays.
“I’ve missed you so much,” his mother coos when she scoops Kyungsoo into her
arms, “I can’t believe how old you look now.”
Kyungsoo wiggles in his mom’s death grip and laughs, “It’s only been a few
months.”
“I know,” she hums and pats her son’s head, “But a few months feels like
forever.”
Once Kyungsoo makes it into the door of his home, he’s instantly roped into
helping decorate the living room with his little sister. They sing along to
Christmas carols on the stereo as they string ornaments on the tree, Kyungsoo’s
little sister pleading to get on his shoulders to put the star at the top. The
star just barely makes it and Kyungsoo’s wonders how easy it would have been
with one of his taller friends around… With Chanyeol around.
Kyungsoo’s heart comes up in his throat and he puts his sister down on the
floor. She laughs and runs into the kitchen when their mother calls out about
baking cookies. Kyungsoo only joins a few minutes later, once he’s checked his
phone to see a few missed text messages from Jongin.
From: Jongin
What kind of friend r u
You left w/o saying goodbye???
So much for the 3 musketeers RIP
To: Jongin
Is it too late to say I’m sorry?
From: Jongin
Yeol was really upset
Kyungsoo doesn’t know what to say to that. Except he ends up not saying
anything at all, because the next thing he knows, he’s being tackled into a hug
that plants him right into one of the nice sofas. Deadweight rests on top of
him and he groans, trying to push off the boy he knows is crushing him right
now.
“Baekhyun,” Kyungsoo coughs, “Get off!”
Baekhyun grins devilishly as he sits back and lets Kyungsoo sit up too, “Is
that any way to greet your best friend?”
Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, “So we’re just letting anyone into our home these
days.” he mutters and Baekhyun scrunches up his nose in feigned annoyance.
“Please, I’ve basically been your replacement since you’ve been gone. Your mom
loves me.” Baekhyun argues and Kyungsoo rolls his eyes.
“I can’t believe you think that you could ever replace me, Byun.” Kyungsoo says
with an eye roll, “How did you convince my mom to let you in here, huh?”
Baekhyun laughs, “I told you, she loves me! My mom also sent me over with
shortbread cookies.”
“That’s what I thought,” Kyungsoo smirks, “Some replacement you are.”
Baekhyun cackles, “Mom says I can spend the night here,” he says then, “If you
want some quality best friend time.”
Kyungsoo pretends to think it over until a pillow hits him and he glares at
Baekhyun, “What kind of quality is this?”
“Admit it, Soo, you missed me.”
“I will admit nothing.”
“Awe! You did miss me!”
“Shut up,” Kyungsoo grumbles, but he’s smiling anyway. He really did miss
Baekhyun and, boy, has he got a lot to tell him now…
The night persists, giving Baekhyun and Kyungsoo barely enough time to catch up
on everything they’ve missed over a nearly four month period. They end up on
Kyungsoo’s bedroom floor, bored of video games that are now paused on the
television screen and the controllers strewn across the floor. Pillows and
blankets have begun to collect around them, turning into a fort like it used to
when they were kids.
It’s getting pretty late and Baekhyun yawns, stretching out to crack his back.
Normally, Kyungsoo would shudder uncomfortably and hit Baekhyun for cracking
his back like that, but he doesn’t react at all. Jongin’s text message has
suddenly bubbled to the forefront of Kyungsoo’s thoughts and he can’t let it
go. Yeol was really upset.
“What’s wrong with you?” Baekhyun asks, reaching out to playfully nudge
Kyungsoo’s shoulder.
“Nothing,” Kyungsoo blurts and he knows exactly how obvious he’s made it that
there’s something definitely wrong.
Baekhyun is like his brother, he can sense these things. At least, that’s what
he’s says. And maybe he’s onto something, because Baekhyun definitely knows
that something’s up. Baekhyun sits up straighter and looks Kyungsoo in the eye,
but Kyungsoo turns away to look elsewhere. His eyes are starting to get glossy
and he doesn’t want Baekhyun to see. He’s thinking too much about nothing
again.
“Soo,” Baekhyun calls out, “You know you can tell me everything. We’ve known
each other since we were in diapers. We literally shit in each other’s
presence.”
“Ew, okay,” Kyungsoo scrunches up his nose in disgust, finally turning to look
at Baekhyun, “First off, you don’t have to be so crass. And secondly, as if we
knew what we were doing, we couldn’t even talk yet.”
“My point is,” Baekhyun says, ignoring Kyungsoo’s valid arguments, “We’ve been
through just about everything together and so I’m going to be here for you
through this. Whatever this is. You just have to tell me.”
Kyungsoo sighs and leans back against his bed, looking up at the ceiling, “I
have… Two roommates.” he begins, trying to collect his thoughts.
“Yeah,” Baekhyun urges as he leans next to Kyungsoo, “You’ve told me about
them.”
“And well…” Kyungsoo takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, thinking, before
he lets it out, “Promise me you won’t look at me any differently…”
“You know that I would never-”
“Promise me.”
“I promise, Soo,” Baekhyun says with sincerity, all hints of playfulness
finally disappearing from his tone, “I promise.” he restates, reaching out to
squeeze Kyungsoo’s hand.
Kyungsoo squeezes back and closes his eyes again, “I walked in on one of them
fooling around with his best friend. It was… It was Jongin. Jongin had his
hands down Sehun’s pants and they were kissing. Messing around, ya know? I felt
really bad, I didn’t mean to walk in and see them, but Jongin… Jongin told me
that everyone at that school does it. Right? Because there’s no girls around
for miles so they just kind of mess around with each other instead. He said
it’s not a big deal.”
Kyungsoo’s grip on Baekhyun’s hand tightens as he thinks about what to say
next, “Then there’s… Chanyeol. He and I… We fooled around a bit too. And we
kissed a lot… I tried to convince myself that it was just because there’s no
girls around, but I like him, Baekhyun. I want to be with him. I thought it was
so wrong, I thought I wasn’t allowed to… So I told him we had to stop. I told
Chanyeol I didn’t want to mess around anymore and I ruined our friendship. But
then… Then Jongin tells me that he’s actually dating Sehun, that this whole
thing about girls is a coverup. And I- I want- I want to be with Chanyeol, but
I fucked up. I fucked up so bad...”
All of these feelings well up and burst out of Kyungsoo as he talks to
Baekhyun. He can feel Baekhyun’s hold on his own hand loosening, but he keeps
tightening his grip, afraid of losing his best friend over liking a boy. This
is possibly one of the most terrifying moments of Kyungsoo’s life and he can’t
stop the tears from coming or the ache in his chest as he sobs about Chanyeol
and liking him. Liking a boy.
Baekhyun has grown silent, doesn’t say a single word as Kyungsoo cries next to
him. He can feel Baekhyun’s hand slipping away from his own, but he doesn’t
want to let go, because Baekhyun is supposed to be his best friend, he’s
supposed to support him and be here for him, but… Maybe being a homo is just
too much for Baekhyun to accept.
“Kyungsoo,” Baekhyun whispers softly, “I have a boyfriend.” he blurts and that
makes Kyungsoo’s sobs come to an abrupt halt.
“W-What?”
“I have a boyfriend,” Baekhyun says quietly, turning to look at Kyungsoo, “His
name is Zitao. Do you remember him? He’s the transfer student from China. He
and I have been dating for almost a year.”
“Zitao…” Kyungsoo repeats, turning to look at Baekhyun with his watery eyes,
“You and Zitao are dating?”
Baekhyun nods, “It’s okay…” he says taking a deep breath and pulling Kyungsoo
against him for a much needed hug, “It’s okay to like boys.”
By the time the two have settled in for the night it’s nearing two in the
morning. Baekhyun is fast asleep against his pillow and Kyungsoo lays awake
still, staring at the shadows being casted about the room from the light of the
moon. It’s okay to like boys. The words ring in his ears and weigh on his mind
heavily. If it’s okay to like boys, is he allowed to like Chanyeol? Is he
allowed to like his roommate like this? Kyungsoo doesn’t fall asleep that
night.
When Kyungsoo wakes up, Baekhyun is already sitting up in the bed, texting on
his phone. Kyungsoo doesn’t bother prying into it and instead he rubs his eyes,
still sore from the crying last night. Baekhyun turns to look over at Kyungsoo
and smiles sheepishly.
“So, you like boys.” Baekhyun hums and Kyungsoo’s body jolts.
“Shut up,” Kyungsoo mutters, “I don’t know if I like only boys. Girls are nice
too. I just… Right now I like Chanyeol.” he pauses and sighs, “How long… Have
you liked boys for?”
“Forever,” Baekhyun admits, “I’ve always liked boys. Girls are nice, they’re
pretty. But I want to be with boys. I want to be with Zitao.” he looks over at
Kyungsoo and smiles, “Are you going to tell your mom?”
Kyungsoo shakes his head, “I don’t want to ruin Christmas,” he whispers and
Baekhyun chuckles.
“Trust me, you’re not going to ruin Christmas if you tell your mom you like
boys… Your mom is very understanding. She… She was the first person I told,
Kyungsoo.”
Kyungsoo chokes on nothing, “W-What?”
“I was too afraid,” Baekhyun pulls his knees up to his chest, “To tell my
parents. And your mom saw me and Zitao holding hands one day after school when
she came to pick up your sister. I think she knew, like she always knew that
I’m gay. When she asked me to introduce Zitao to her, I begged her not to tell
my parents about him. She told me it’s okay and I think that if she can be okay
with me - her favourite son - being gay then she’ll be okay with you being gay
or bi or whatever you are too.”
Kyungsoo smiles, his heart still feels heavy, but he’s comforted knowing that
Baekhyun had someone while he was away, “Hey, I’m happy for you… And Zitao.”
Baekhyun uncurls from on himself and grabs Kyungsoo, hugging him tight, “I’ll
be glad for you and that Chanyeol guy once you’re together too.”
Kyungsoo blushes and pushes Baekhyun away, “I don’t even know if he likes boys,
Baekhyun.”
“I get this feeling that he does,” Baekhyun says, “If he’s kissing you, he
probably likes boys too. If he doesn’t, I’d say he at least likes you.”
Kyungsoo isn’t sure about that exactly, but he figures it’s worth a try… He’s
also not sure about telling his mom about liking a boy. Sure, Baekhyun had
admitted it to his mom, but that’s because he had been caught, really. However,
knowing that his mom was okay with it is more of an incentive to tell her how
he feels about this boy… But maybe, he thinks, after Christmas would be better.
It’s the day before he’s supposed to leave for campus again. Kyungsoo’s mom is
being her usual emotional self about it, especially since her two babies are
going to be going back to school and Kyungsoo’s dad is still away on business
on the other side of the world. This is the day that Kyungsoo decides to tell
his mom, because at least this way he’ll be gone the next day in case anything
goes wrong. That doesn’t stop his nerves.
“Mom,” Kyungsoo calls, entering her home office well after supper has passed.
She looks up from the papers on her desk and smiles, slipping the glasses from
her nose before folding them on top of her books.
“Yes, dear?” she asks and Kyungsoo stands idly by the doorframe, “Why don’t you
come sit down? You look like you have a lot to say.”
Kyungsoo does and when he does, he spills everything. About the boys kissing,
about kissing Chanyeol and about liking Chanyeol. He tells her everything,
except for maybe about the sexy times, because he figures he should spare his
mother those details at least. When he’s done talking, his mother is still
watching her son in patient silence and she smiles.
“So,” she begins, “Does this boy know that you like him?”
“Uh,” Kyungsoo says dumbly, “What?” he asks, confused, like his mom should be
reacting differently since her son just told her that he likes a boy.
“Did you tell him how you feel?”
“N-No,” Kyungsoo stutters, his eyebrows knitting together, “I didn’t think I
had to say…”
“It sounds like you need to tell him your feelings.”
“But, I don’t think he feels the same way-”
“Doesn’t matter. You should still tell him how you feel about him.” his mom
smiles and reaches across the table to hold her son’s hand, “You’re allowed to
feel like this, Kyungsoo. You’re allowed to like whomever your heart chooses.
Don’t keep it to yourself out of fear of rejection.”
After Christmas break, Kyungsoo feels a whole lot less confused before he had
gone on his holidays. That doesn’t stop his heart from beating out of his chest
with the nervousness of seeing Chanyeol again. They’re still roommates and he’s
feeling incredibly anxious about being so close to him, knowing that he feels
the way he feels about Chanyeol and knowing that it’s okay to feel like this.
As Kyungsoo enters through Arion House down Gladiator Boulevard, he’s
unsurprised to find that Chanyeol is still avoiding him. When he walks into
their dorm room, Chanyeol does his best to look away even when Kyungsoo greets
him. Kyungsoo’s heart does a flip in his chest and it squeezes tight when he
finally looks at Chanyeol in full awareness of his feelings for him.
Chanyeol looks so incredibly handsome with his hair dyed bright red all over
again and that awful Placid Blue scarf draped over his shoulders. Kyungsoo’s
mouth runs dry when he tries to reply and so he ends up letting the greeting
linger for too long until it’s way too late for him to say anything at all.
Chanyeol looks away, occupies himself with unpacking his suitcase and pointedly
not making eye contact with Kyungsoo. So, Kyungsoo does the same, trying not to
think about how all he wants to do is hug Chanyeol until he physically can’t
anymore. All is silent until Jongin walks through the door and grabs Kyungsoo,
hugging him into a crushing squeeze.
“I missed you two idiots,” Jongin says, after he’s let go of Kyungsoo and moves
onto his next victim, Chanyeol, for a deathly hug.
“I’m kind of offended, but also not,” Kyungsoo mumbles and Chanyeol visibly
looks like he’s in pain from trying not to laugh out loud, like he’s afraid
he’s not allowed to be happy in Kyungsoo’s presence.
“Anyway,” Jongin clears his throat and looks at Kyungsoo pointedly, “I’m going
to go visit Sehun. I expect you two to be friends again when I return.”
Kyungsoo and Chanyeol look at each other awkwardly from the corners of their
eyes and then not at all. Jongin sighs and grabs his jacket from the coatrack
before he ducks out the door from which he entered. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol are
left in silence, both of them are unsure how to fill it.
Chanyeol clears his throat, ready to take on Jongin’s task of reconciling with
Kyungsoo, “How were your holid-”
“I like you,” Kyungsoo blurts out, his face heating up at an alarming rate as
he watches as Chanyeol’s eyes go wide and his jaw drops.
“W-What?”
“I like you,” Kyungsoo says slower this time, looking up to make eye contact
with Chanyeol, “And I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings. I thought that you were
only kissing me, because you had no girls around to kiss. I didn’t think that…
That you would feel anything for me at all. I didn’t think that telling you I
wanted to stop would hurt you. Kissing you was hurting me, because I thought
that… I thought that you didn’t like boys… That you didn’t like me in that way.
I should have asked instead of assuming. I’m so sorry, Chanyeol.”
Chanyeol stutters, his face turning incredibly red from his neck all the way up
to the tips of his ears, “Kyungsoo, I never thought… Not once, about girls.
When we uh, that first time we kissed, it was… I was so… I never- um- I-” he
tries to speak, but everything comes out incoherent and he looks like he’s
getting frustrated with himself.
“Slowly,” Kyungsoo says, reaching out to take Chanyeol’s hand, “Tell me
slowly.”
Chanyeol flinches at the touch, but he doesn’t pull away, “I’ve had a crush on
you. Ever since I saw you from the second floor of the main building,” he says
in one breath, squeezing Kyungsoo’s fingers, “I thought you were so cute.”
Kyungsoo blushes, “R-Really?”
Chanyeol nods, “I know it’s… I mean, we’re not supposed to…” he swallows the
lump in his throat as tears spring to his eyes, “And when we… For the first
time… I’ve never felt like that before.”
“I’ve never felt like this before either,” Kyungsoo admits, looking up at
Chanyeol, “But I want to. I want to feel like this. With you.”
“I want,” Chanyeol takes a deep, shuddering breath, “I want this too. I’ve
always- Kyungsoo, I-”
“It’s okay,” Kyungsoo whispers, reaching up to cup Chanyeol’s face, “It’s
okay,”
Kyungsoo surprises himself and Chanyeol when he kisses him, soft on Chanyeol’s
lips the way Chanyeol had first kissed him. Chanyeol jumps and leans away
quickly - he looks nervous, unsure, all over again. And, well, it’s Kyungsoo’s
job to reassure him that this is okay, even though they’re both boys, because
they like each other… And that’s… That’s okay.
“Are you sure…?” Chanyeol breathes barely above a whisper against Kyungsoo’s
mouth and Kyungsoo nods, lips brushing Chanyeol’s with every motion.
“Yes,” he whispers back, “Chanyeol, I like you.”
“But what about…” Chanyeol’s voice trails off, “I mean, we’re both boys…”
“It’s okay to like boys,” Kyungsoo reassures Chanyeol, his hands coming to rest
on his waist, squeezing him there gently, “We’re allowed to like each other,
Chanyeol.”
Chanyeol caresses Kyungsoo’s face - his hands are shaking, “Is it really okay?”
“Yes.” Kyungsoo says, bumping his nose off of Chanyeol’s.
Chanyeol takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, “I like you too.” he breathes
out, “A lot, Kyungsoo. I like you a lot.”
Kyungsoo’s heart skips a beat as he pulls Chanyeol into another kiss, his mouth
opening for Chanyeol to explore. Chanyeol’s kisses are so gentle, his trembling
hands hold onto Kyungsoo’s waist as he sucks carefully on Kyungsoo’s plush
lips. His tongue prods between Kyungsoo’s lips next, his tongue is wet and warm
against Kyungsoo’s own causing them both to groan into each other.
Chanyeol backs up, guiding Kyungsoo with him as they kiss tenderly at first,
and then hungrily as the backs of Chanyeol’s knees hit the edge of the bed and
he pulls Kyungsoo on top of him on the way down. They fall comfortably onto
Chanyeol’s bed, lips only breaking apart for gasping breaths of air. They’re
still a bit inexperienced, and that shows in the way they nip a little too hard
and scramble for each other’s clothing, but it’s okay. It’s okay, because they
like each other.
When Chanyeol smiles into their kiss, Kyungsoo smiles too.
                                      ***
Things have… Changed. And that’s okay. It’s okay, because Chanyeol and Kyungsoo
are good again.
There’s still a lot of anxiety, now that their feelings are out in the open,
but Kyungsoo and Chanyeol feel a little more relaxed in each other’s company.
When they’re alone, they’re content, but when they’re in public, there’s this
underlying fear that they’re going to show too much affection to each other.
They don’t want to be caught, they don’t want to get exposed. So the pretend to
be best friends in the presence of others and they get to be boyfriends when
they’re alone.
Kyungsoo wishes he could have a little more, but he has to settle. He has to
settle, because he’s heard about the things that happen to students who get
caught doing things like this. He doesn’t want to be expelled for kissing
another boy, but he wants to kiss Chanyeol always. This is a dilemma for them
both, especially since, now that they’re finally together, all they want to do
is indulge in one another. Chanyeol just wants to hold Kyungsoo’s hand and
Kyungsoo just wants to kiss Chanyeol’s silly grin off of his face.
They’re settling, for now.
“What are you doing after class?” Chanyeol whispers, leaning over his desk to
reach Kyungsoo’s ear from behind.
Kyungsoo shivers, “Nothing,” he responds and he can practically feel Chanyeol’s
grin.
“Stay behind,” Chanyeol hums into his ear and Kyungsoo’s entire body thrums
with anticipation.
A meter stick hits the edge of Kyungsoo’s desk, the closest one to the teacher
as he paces through the rows of desks. Kyungsoo nearly jumps out of his skin
and Chanyeol shrinks back into his seat, shame on his face for having been
caught whispering. The teacher clears his throat and continues to read from the
book in his hands, something about Bach or Beethoven. Kyungsoo’s not really
sure, because he’s not listening. He’s too busy thinking about Chanyeol.
Once the bell has rung and the students have rushed out of the room to get a
quicker start on their weekend, Chanyeol grabs Kyungsoo’s hand and drags him to
the music department studios. They don’t speak on their way there, only
offering small smiles and quick greetings to teachers and peers as they move
speedily through the campus. As Kyungsoo enters the studio, he hears the thunk
that Chanyeol’s guitar case makes when it hits the ugly carpeting covering the
floor.
Still no words pass between them, not that they could anyway what with
Chanyeol’s lips on Kyungsoo’s in a single second. The nervous anticipation of
making it to the security of their studio melts away from them both and the
tight knot that had formed in Kyungsoo’s stomach all but unravels so he’s
relaxed in Chanyeol’s embrace. They’re still so new to this, still so hesitant
even though they’re desperate for whatever it is that their bodies want in the
moment.
Chanyeol pulls away first with a strand of saliva between his lips and
Kyungsoo’s still connecting them. Kyungsoo licks out to break it with his
tongue and Chanyeol groans, because that was sort of hot. They’re panting
heavily and Kyungsoo has a bit of problem in his pants where the slacks have
become a little too tight for him. It appears that Chanyeol is having a similar
problem, so Kyungsoo opts to help him out with it.
“Take your pants off,” Kyungsoo says, grasping Chanyeol’s shoulders and nudging
him toward one of the faded couches against the back wall.
Chanyeol easily obeys, nodding his head as he quickly undoes his belt. Kyungsoo
hastily checks the lock of the studio door and then flicks the switch to light
up the ‘recording’ sign outside of the door. He really doesn’t want any
disturbances for what he’s got planned at this moment. When he looks back at
Chanyeol, he finds that the taller boy is sitting there staring at him with
dark eyes and his pants around his ankles.
“Soo,” Chanyeol calls out, his voice is much deeper than earlier and it makes
Kyungsoo’s body shiver.
Kyungsoo nearly trips over himself on his way back over to Chanyeol. Chanyeol’s
got his arms wide open like he’s waiting for Kyungsoo plop himself on his lap,
but instead of doing that, Kyungsoo surprises him by dropping to his knees
between his spread thighs. His stomach clenches as Kyungsoo pulls his hardened
dick from his underwear and gently pumps his length - it looks so big in
Kyungsoo’s rather small hand.
Chanyeol swallows hard, watching with half-lidded eyes at the way that Kyungsoo
licks his lips while staring at his dick.
“Soo,”
“Hm?”
“What are you- Are you gonna-” Chanyeol chews his bottom lip and his eyebrows
furrow as he tries to search for what he wants to say.
“Shush,” Kyungsoo hums, leaning closer to Chanyeol’s cock, “Try to be quiet.”
he whispers, before he takes the head of Chanyeol’s dick between his lips.
Chanyeol cries out in pleasure, but it’s muffled in the fabric of his school
jacket. Kyungsoo’s lips are so plush and they look so good around his cock that
Chanyeol can barely contain himself. His eyes slip shut as Kyungsoo sucks on
the head, swirling his tongue around it experimentally. That makes Chanyeol
keen and Kyungsoo smiles as he does it again. And again and again.
Kyungsoo tries to take more of Chanyeol into his mouth and down his throat, but
he gags unexpectedly at the length. That makes Chanyeol pull out of his mouth
immediately, his eyes searching Kyungsoo’s face for any sign of hurt, like he’s
terrified that he’s forced himself onto Kyungsoo or did something wrong.
“You don’t have to do this,” Chanyeol says sheepishly, caressing Kyungsoo’s
cheek with one hand and letting the pad of his thumb swipe over Kyungsoo’s
bottom lip.
“I want to,” Kyungsoo rasps, taking Chanyeol’s cock back into his hands.
He pumps it a few times, watching Chanyeol watch him. He’s never actually
sucked someone off before, but he thinks of the ways that he would like to have
someone suck him off and tries them out on Chanyeol. While he can’t take all of
Chanyeol into his mouth, he does his best by lavishing his tongue and lips over
the head while stroking the base of Chanyeol’s cock with his hand. Chanyeol’s
fingers bury into Kyungsoo’s hair and he helps guide him along his cock,
groaning with his head thrown back against the couch.
Kyungsoo finds that moaning around Chanyeol’s dick does the trick, the
vibrations making Chanyeol’s thighs clench until he’s suddenly shuddering. Come
fills Kyungsoo’s mouth faster than he can swallow the salty substance, but he
does manage a little, the rest of it spilling from his mouth. When looks up
from his bangs to see Chanyeol’s flushed, sated face looking at him in complete
adoration, Kyungsoo suddenly doesn’t mind the awkwardness he had to stumble
through to get to this point.
“Shit, Soo,” Chanyeol breathes with a small laugh, “That was- Holy fuck.”
Kyungsoo licks his lips, tastes Chanyeol still there, and shivers. He’s not
sure if he likes the taste, but knowing that he brought Chanyeol to this point
with just his mouth gives him a rush of power.
“Your turn,” Chanyeol insists, tucking himself away into his underwear, “Come
up.”
Kyungsoo wobbles onto his legs and Chanyeol catches him, pulling him onto the
couch so he can spread him out on it. It’s evident that Kyungsoo is still hard
in his pants and Chanyeol blushes red at the sight of Kyungsoo’s cock straining
to get it out. He looks as if he’s about to drool when his lips attach to the
bulge and he sucks on the fabric of Kyungsoo’s pants.
“Sh-Shit,” Kyungsoo whimpers, Chanyeol’s mouth finding the head of his cock
easily through his trousers so he can suck on it.
Chanyeol moans against his pants before pulling them down completely.
Kyungsoo’s lower half is almost completely bare by the time Chanyeol works his
hands around his cock, the slide of his dry palm only stinging a little.
Kyungsoo is significantly smaller than Chanyeol, so when Chanyeol bends over to
take Kyungsoo into his mouth, he manages to take him all the way in until
Kyungsoo hits the back of his throat. Chanyeol doesn’t gag and Kyungsoo
whimpers at the pleasure that courses through his entire body.
The warmth encasing Kyungsoo’s dick so suddenly sends a shocking spark up
Kyungsoo’s spine. It’s so hot and wet and Kyungsoo wants to fuck into it. His
hips jerk on their own and Chanyeol has to force them down with his hands
holding Kyungsoo firmly in place. Chanyeol begins to suck in earnest, a bit
sloppier and a little unsure, but it still feels so good to Kyungsoo. When
Chanyeol’s curious fingers slip down to Kyungsoo’s ass and prod gently at his
puckered hole, Kyungsoo almost screams as he comes. Chanyeol barely manages to
swallow it all down, only gagging slightly after Kyungsoo’s dick has been
pulled out of his mouth.
“Oh God,” Kyungsoo breathes heavily, his eyes shut tight as he tries to collect
himself.
“Good?” Chanyeol asks eagerly, like he needs the praise.
“So good.” Kyungsoo whispers, “Where did you learn how to do that thing with
your tongue?”
Chanyeol flushes, “I don’t know, I just thought I’d do it... It felt right?”
Kyungsoo laughs breathlessly, “You’ve got good instincts.”
Chanyeol giggles and presses his face into the crook of Kyungsoo’s neck, “I
like you.”
Kyungsoo smiles and sighs happily for once, “I like you too.”
“We should get to work, hm?” Chanyeol hums against the skin of Kyungsoo’s neck
after a moment of silence.
“Probably,” Kyungsoo pouts, threading his fingers through Chanyeol’s hair, “I’d
rather just sleep.”
“Me too.”
“Do you want to?”
“Yeah.”
They spend the rest of their scheduled studio slot cuddling and napping on the
couch. Kyungsoo feels at ease, for once. Especially tucked away in the security
of Chanyeol’s arms.
                                      ***
It’s late January, so the campus is dusted in white, cold snow. A sharp, chilly
wind cuts through the students as they walk from their dorms to their classes
and back again. This forces them to wear their clunky boots, heavy winter
jackets, and ugly house coloured scarves, gloves, and toques at all times.
Kyungsoo doesn’t mind it so much, because he likes winter’s silence and he
likes the way that his footprints fall in line with Chanyeol’s in the freshly
fallen snow.
“Minseok-hyung is giving out hot chocolate at his dorm,” Chanyeol says,
watching as a few first year students walk by holding paper cup of steaming
liquid.
The wind howls and makes Kyungsoo shiver - he’s cold to his bones, “You think
he’ll spare some for a couple of Arion House students?”
Chanyeol chuckles and shudders as the wind blows between them again, “Worth a
shot. I’ll race you!” he grins, before running towards the entrances to
Gladiator Boulevard - otherwise called the Boulevard of Broken Dreams by any
student who hates being stuck there during the long winter months.
It takes a moment for Kyungsoo to gather himself enough to race after Chanyeol,
but Chanyeol stops by the entrance and waits for him to come closer. Kyungsoo
nearly slips a few times, the ice under the snow making for a very slippery and
unsafe travel, but he makes it. Chanyeol laughs loudly when Kyungsoo slaps his
arm for making him run and that makes Kyungsoo smile.
They walk the rest of the way to Minseok’s dorm. He’s the president of Dionysus
House, which is the Theatre Department at the other end of campus, and he’s a
very good hyung. He takes care of the students who have come after him and he
dotes on his younger friends whenever they need his help. As they approach the
house, Kyungsoo sees that the ugly Primrose Yellow goat flag of Dionysus House
is flapping harshly in the breeze.
“Kyungsoo, Chanyeol,” Minseok greets with a warm smile, “What brings you two
here?”
“I heard about the hot chocolate, hyung,” Chanyeol grins sheepishly, “Still
have any left?”
Minseok laughs, his eyes turning into crescents as he opens the door to the
house wider, “Come in.”
Kyungsoo and Chanyeol sit awkwardly in the common room of Dionysus house while
Minseok makes hot chocolate for them in the kitchen across the hall. The vice
president, Luhan, walks by and then backtracks to look at the two Arion boys in
confusions. He opens his mouth to ask what they’re doing when Minseok comes up
behind him holding two cups of hot chocolate. Luhan ends up laughing instead.
“What are you doing, giving away our hot chocolate to a couple of Arion boys?”
Luhan asks with a teasing tone.
Kyungsoo’s face flushes as Minseok passes him the cup, “Are we not allowed to
have it?”
Minseok rolls his eyes, a smile plastered on his face, “Ignore Luhannie.” he
hums.
Luhan grins, standing incredibly close to Minseok. For a moment, Kyungsoo
thinks that they might be like himself and Chanyeol or Jongin and Sehun. He’s
got to shake that thought from his head before he says anything that might
complicate everything for everyone. Or worse, ruin everything.
“What are you two doing today?” Minseok asks, sitting on the chair across from
them.
Chanyeol shrugs, “We weren’t really going to do anything much. Might go to the
studio and work on our song for class later.”
Kyungsoo bobs his head in agreement, “It’s just about finished. I’m almost done
with the lyrics so we have to record our voices is all at this point.”
“I can’t believe you managed to write a song so quickly,” Luhan says is awe,
sitting in the chair beside Minseok, “Will you two be part of the ensemble that
performs for our upcoming play?”
“I didn’t realize that Arion students did the music for your performances.”
Kyungsoo admits.
Minseok nods his head, “They do! One year, the students composed all of the
music for the play and one of the fourth year students orchestrated the entire
concert band that performed.”
“Chanyeol, you should take part in it.” Luhan insists with a grin, “I’ve heard
you playing your guitar around campus and it’s really nice.”
Chanyeol’s cheeks turn a little rosy from the compliment, “Well, Kyungsoo could
play piano.”
“You play an instrument too?” Minseok asks excitedly, “I thought you were
accepted into the school for your voice.”
Kyungsoo offers a shy smile, “I was… But I can play piano too.”
“I hope you tryout for the ensemble!” Minseok says happily, “That way we can
all see more of each other.”
“Yeah, it’s hard since we’re always on opposite ends of the campus.” Luhan
pouts.
Chanyeol laughs, “We will!” he decides, polishing off the remainder of his hot
chocolate, “We’d love to be a part of your last production here Minseok. I
heard you wrote a lot of this one?”
Minseok nods, his cheeks heating up dramatically, “It’s my final piece since
I’m graduating and I wanted to make it something huge. To leave my mark here,
you know, like the students before us.”
“I’m sure it’ll be great.” Kyungsoo smiles as he takes the last sip of his hot
chocolate.
Luhan smiles, reaching out to pat Minseok’s knee, “It’ll be unforgettable.” he
says, but there’s more to his statement than that. It’s an implication that
both Chanyeol and Kyungsoo seem to miss.
                                      ***
Chanyeol twirls his pen between his fingers, watching Kyungsoo from the corner
of his eye a little bored. They’ve been sitting in their dorm room for hours
without much to do since Kyungsoo is completely stumped on the lyrics for their
song. He’s got so many ideas swirling around in his head, but he can’t put them
together to create a coherent verse or chorus or anything at all really.
Kyungsoo chews on the back of his pencil, leaving teeth marks in the wood, as
he stares at the blank notepad in his hands. He’s been sitting hunched over it
for so long that he can’t remember life before he sat down with it. It’s
frustrating, really, to have so many feelings pent up inside of him and not
being able to formulate something with them. He’s not quite sure why he’s
lacking inspiration, but love songs are just difficult to write when all he
wants is to write about Chanyeol. Except he can’t, because he doesn’t want to
give off the vibes that he and Chanyeol are anything more than best friends.
“We should take a break,” Chanyeol sighs, leaning back in his desk chair,
“We’re not making any progress and we’re just getting frustrated now.”
“I don’t know why this is so hard.” Kyungsoo sounds irritated, but he doesn’t
mean to be - it’s just this bloody project is really starting to take a toll on
him.
“Listen, we’ve got until the end of the year to submit it.” Chanyeol says,
spinning in his chair to face Kyungsoo, “And everything else is already
recorded, so don’t stress out over it.”
“How can I write a love song without it sounding hella gay?” Kyungsoo frowns
and looks over at Chanyeol, “Because if I start singing about a boy, it’s going
to sound hella gay.”
Chanyeol snorts, “You are hella gay.”
Kyungsoo’s face flushes red and he crumples up one of his notepad sheets before
tossing it at Chanyeol’s head, “Listen, you know I can’t sound hella gay…”
“I know, Soo,” Chanyeol finally gets up out of his chair and approaches the
side of Kyungsoo’s bed, “We’ll find a way around it, okay?”
“Will we?” Kyungsoo asks, and by the look in his eyes, Chanyeol understands
that he’s asking about more than just the song lyrics, “Will we really?”
Chanyeol nods, cupping Kyungsoo’s face in his hands gingerly, “Yes.” he smiles
and leans in for a quick peck.
Kyungsoo smiles back, his cheeks turning a light pink before he reaches to pull
Chanyeol in for another kiss, because Chanyeol’s kisses do this wonderful thing
to his insides where he fills with warmth and comfort. Chanyeol is more than
happy to reciprocate those kisses, because he feels short bursts of fire inside
whenever he gets to hold Kyungsoo in his arms like this. They’re both still so
new to this, to feeling something for someone of the same sex, but it’s freeing
and exciting and they’re both happy.
“Have I ever told you just how much I like you?” Chanyeol whispers, pulling
Kyungsoo towards him by the tie around his neck, “Or how much I like kissing
you? Or how much I like your smile? Or how much-”
“Stop it,” Kyungsoo flusters, grabbing Chanyeol by the collar of his shirt,
“Stop being so corny.” he says, but he’s smiling so wide.
“Never,” Chanyeol grins, dipping down to kiss him again, “I’ll never stop
liking you.”
Kissing is a rarity most days, because whenever Chanyeol or Kyungsoo want to
actually kiss, there’s too much of a risk. They can’t get caught, can’t be
seen, can’t have these feelings. But they do have these feelings and they’re
not going to let them go, because feeling this way makes them all soft on the
inside. So when they’re alone in their dorms, they kiss a lot. And all the
times during the day that they wanted to kiss are shared secretly with each
other.
“This one is from this morning when you helped me fix my tie on the way to
class.” Chanyeol whispers, kissing Kyungsoo.
“This one is from our afternoon Latin class, because you made me laugh so
much.” Kyungsoo giggles at the memory as he presses a kiss to Chanyeol’s mouth.
“This one is from lunch break when you gave me your extra dessert.”
Another kiss.
“This one is from music theory when you let me borrow your notes.”
And another.
“This one is for when you looked at me and you smiled.”
And another.
“This one is for when you hugged me and whispered ‘I like you’.”
And another.
They share all the kisses in the evening that they kept to themselves all day
long and they indulge in it. Soft kisses, short kisses, long kisses, rough
kisses… Kisses on the nose, on the forehead, on the cheek, on the neck, kisses
everywhere. They’re all special kisses, because they’re shared with each other.
And, God, Kyungsoo wants to kiss Chanyeol forever!
Alas, forever is cut far too short. The door to their dorm room swings open and
Jongin is standing in the frame. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol jump apart, terrified to
be caught kissing, but relieved to see that it’s just Jongin with Sehun
trailing behind. Their relief doesn’t last very long.
Jongin’s face is flushed and his chest is heaving from having run all the way
to the dorms from across campus. He pants heavily as he enters, slamming the
door shut behind them. He looks mortified, but not for having caught Chanyeol
and Kyungsoo kissing. The colour is mostly drained from his face aside from the
red dusting his cheeks and he looks like he’s seen something terrible.
“Jongin…” Chanyeol says slowly, wiping his mouth where he can still taste
Kyungsoo, “What’s wrong?”
“It’s bad,” Jongin heaves, “It’s so bad, Chanyeol… Luhan and Minseok… Are being
expelled.”
“What the hell?” Chanyeol yells, “Why the hell would they expel Minseok? Or
Luhan?”
“Minseok?” Kyungsoo’s eyebrows furrow, “How? Why? I don’t understand.”
Minseok is a good student - Kyungsoo would even say that he’s the most
exemplary student on campus, He takes care of the younger students and is very
friendly among everyone enrolled at the school. He’s really popular, Kyungsoo
thinks, and probably one of the most academically outstanding students at the
academy. He can’t figure out why on earth Minseok would ever be expelled. Or
Luhan either, really, since he’s captain of nearly every sports team that the
school has to offer. It doesn’t add up.
Jongin takes a deep shaking breath, “They got caught,” he explains.
Oh. Kyungsoo’s stomach twists itself into a sickening knot and bile threatens
to come up in his throat.
“They got caught kissing,” Sehun says, his voice cracks and it’s clear he’s
been crying from the puffiness of his red, red eyes, “They got caught and now
they’re being expelled.”
Chanyeol winces, “W-What do you mean?”
Jongin starts to cry, but Sehun won’t touch him like he usually does… Not this
time, “They’re being expelled for being gay!” he cries out.
“T-They can’t do that!” Kyungsoo gasps, looking at Chanyeol, “They can’t do
that, can they?”
Chanyeol looks away, looks at anywhere else but where Kyungsoo is standing, “I
don’t understand…” he whispers.
Kyungsoo doesn’t understand it either.
Rumors spread among the students like a wildfire about Minseok and Luhan being
homos. Some students make casual slurs, repeating what they’ve heard teachers
and professors say when they thought they were in private. Absolutely nothing
that they say about them is pleasant and it makes Kyungsoo fall violently ill.
“Hey,” Jongdae calls softly, “Did you hear?”
Kyungsoo doesn’t turn over to look at the other boy in the infirmary.
“Yah, Kyungsoo.”
“What?”
“Did you hear about Minseok and Luhan?” Jongdae asks again, ducking his head
low when the nurse looks at them from across the infirmary.
“Who hasn’t?” Kyungsoo mumbles in reply - he really doesn’t want to talk about
this right now. He can barely think about it without feeling faint.
“They were rehearsing.” Jongdae whispers lowly, “For Minseok’s play. He wrote
the kiss scene into it.”
Kyungsoo turns over to finally face Jongdae, whose nose is rather red from the
head cold he managed to catch from God knows what or who. Normally, Kyungsoo
would grimace and scoot away out of fear of catching whatever germ is going
through anyone else’s system. Except, what Jongdae has said is intriguing - not
something he’s heard before.
“How do you know that?”
“Minseok-hyung,” Jongdae hums, sniffling, “He asked me to help him with his
script before the holidays and he insisted that there be a kiss scene between
two boys.” Jongdae’s face scrunches up, but Kyungsoo doesn’t know why it does -
disgust, perhaps, “I think he wanted to prove a point.”
Kyungsoo sinks back against the uncomfortable bed of the infirmary, “You think
so?”
Jongdae shrugs and pops a cough drop into his mouth, “Maybe. The roles had
already been decided for the play. Minseok was the lead and Luhan was playing
the lead’s close friend. They were the two characters with the kiss scene.
Apparently, some of the teachers on staff didn’t agree with the rehearsals that
they saw.”
Kyungsoo closes his eyes and sighs, feeling pressure pushing against his chest
from an invisible weight, “Do you?”
“Do I what?”
“Agree with it?”
Jongdae swipes a tissue from a nearby box and blows his nose, “It’s… Whatever.”
he mutters, “I don’t think they should have been expelled over some fake kiss
though.”
Kyungsoo isn’t sure how to tell Jongdae that their kissing might not have been
fake after all, so he sighs instead.
“That’s why they’re expelling them, huh?”
“The official cover-up story is that Minseok and Luhan were indulging in
inappropriate behaviours for school related activities and that the play was
too risqué for the stage.”
Kyungsoo scoffs, “It was just a kiss.”
“Yes, but they’re both boys.” Jongdae whispers.
“So?” Kyungsoo blurts out in mild frustration.
Jongdae blinks in surprise, but then he shrugs, “I dunno.”
Things in the infirmary grow quiet after that. Jongdae falls asleep, because
the cold & flu medication makes him drowsy. Kyungsoo stays awake, staring at
the ceiling and wondering what if.
What if it had been him and Chanyeol?
                                      ***
Kyungsoo gets this distinct feeling that Chanyeol is avoiding him. He’s been
laying in bed, helpless and sick for who knows what reason exactly, and just
about everyone has come to see him to wish him well. Every except for Chanyeol.
Which just doesn’t quite make sense, because Chanyeol is his… His boyfriend. He
misses him.
Three days he spends in the infirmary until Chanyeol finally comes by for a
visit.
“Hi,” Chanyeol greets him sheepishly, not making eye contact.
“Yeol?” Kyungsoo squints at him and pouts, “Where’ve you been?”
“I’ve just been thinking,” Chanyeol whispers with a shrug and then he finally
looks at Kyungsoo, “You look pale.”
Kyungsoo frowns, “I missed you.”
“I- I know… I-” he hesitates as his eyes dart around the room searching for
anyone within earshot, “I missed you too. Are you feeling better?”
Kyungsoo shakes his head, “I’m scared, Chanyeol. I’m so scared that it makes me
sick to my stomach.”
Chanyeol swallows hard and reaches out to touch Kyungsoo. In the end, he drops
his hand along with his shoulders, “I’m scared too.” he admits, voice as small
as a mouse.
“I’m scared that you’re going to leave me.” Kyungsoo blurts out in a timid
voice.
The sound of that makes Chanyeol’s head snap in Kyungsoo’s direction - his eyes
are so wide and the expression on his face is one of terror, “I wouldn’t!” he
gasps.
“You didn’t visit. Everyone else visited.”
“I didn’t want to draw suspicion to us,” Chanyeol confesses, “I didn’t want
them to think that we’re… You know.”
Kyungsoo does know. He knows all too well.
“You’re here now though… Why?”
Chanyeol rubs the back of his neck a little awkwardly, “I want you to come
back… We’re all scared, but I don’t think that we should be scared alone.”
There’s really no arguing with Chanyeol when he’s determined or when he looks
like an adorable puppy. So, Kyungsoo moves back into residence that afternoon.
When they reach their dorm, the first thing Chanyeol does is kiss him.
“Listen,” Chanyeol says, pulling Kyungsoo into his chest, “My heart beats like
this for you, okay? Just… I’m not going to let you go just because I’m scared.
I need you by my side, because I’m scared. Alright?”
Kyungsoo laughs despite the fear that makes him tremble, “I’m not going
anywhere.” he sighs, burying his face into Chanyeol’s chest, “I’m terrified of
what will happen if they catch us, but I’m not going to let you go so easily,
Yeol. It’s taken all of my courage to be with you, so I’m not going to leave
now. I’m not going to leave any time soon.”
Chanyeol cups Kyungsoo’s face so gently Kyungsoo is starting to believe that he
may be made up of glass himself, “I’m not going to leave you either.”
They share kisses all night.
“This one is because I’ve missed you more than words can say.”
A kiss.
“This one is because I want you to know that I’m going to stay with you.”
Another kiss.
                                      ***
The rumors about Minseok and Luhan quickly die down. The Academy settles out of
court with Minseok’s and Luhan’s families, offering them large sums of money
and excellent letters of recommendation for the expelled students to keep the
families’ mouths shut. As much as Minseok and Luhan want to fight for their
rights, they’re silenced into oblivion. Minseok’s manuscript is ceremoniously
burned by his family, even as he cries over his hard work. Luhan’s family
enrolls him in a private school in Hong Kong. They’re successfully separated
from one another.
All of this information is only privy to a few students - those who knew them.
Luhan and Minseok keep their friends updated on what’s happening between them.
They lose a few friends along the way, especially when Minseok comes up and
says that he’s bisexual. Luhan follows and comes out as gay. They’re only left
with a small knit circle of people who support them. Among those friends that
stay are Chanyeol, Kyungsoo, Jongin, Sehun, Junmyeon, Yixing, and Yifan.
Jongdae is still in the chat, he’s read the messages, but he doesn’t respond to
any of them.
“Jongdae’s going to be stopping by to pick up some notes for class later.”
Chanyeol says, tossing his cellphone into the side pocket of his bookbag.
Kyungsoo looks up from his blank notebook - he’s been sitting in the recording
studio for hours trying to figure out what to write, but the mentioning of
Jongdae has caught his attention.
“It’s weird, seeing Jongdae in class and joking with him, knowing that if he
knew I was gay that he would ignore me the same way he ignores Minseok and
Luhan. Those three were so close before, nearly inseparable, but now it’s like
they’re nothing to him.” he sighs, tapping his pen against his book.
“You’re thinking too much,” Chanyeol hums, reaching out squeeze Kyungsoo’s
shoulder, “Jongdae will come around.”
“I don’t know…” Kyungsoo frowns, “Sometimes, I think if he knew about me, about
us, that he’d tell the headmasters.”
Chanyeol shakes his head, “Jongdae’s not like that.”
“I know, but,” Kyungsoo shudders, “I’m scared.”
“I am too,” Chanyeol says, “You’re not alone in this, Soo. I’m here with you.”
Kyungsoo looks at Chanyeol and smiles warmly, “I know.” he pauses of a second
and then eyes the guitar in Chanyeol’s hands, “Will you show me how to play
something today?”
Chanyeol laughs and nods, passing the guitar to Kyungsoo, “Do you remember the
chords I showed you last time?”
Kyungsoo shrugs, “I guess we’ll find out,” he hums, running his fingers along
the strings, “Will you show me again?”
“Of course,” Chanyeol grins, moving closer to Kyungsoo on the couch of the
music studio, “Like this,” he says, taking Kyungsoo’s hands in his own and
placing them on the guitar in the right positions, “Now, strum.”
“I wrote lyrics last night,” Kyungsoo says, nonchalantly, as if the whole
reason that they had booked the recording studio today wasn’t because Kyungsoo
needed the space to write their lyrics for class.
“You did?” Chanyeol asks curiously, guiding Kyungsoo’s hands to the next chord
of the song he wrote months ago for their project.
“We can’t use it for class, but I was inspired by the instrumental you put
together for our project.” Kyungsoo explains as he lets Chanyeol’s hand take
over his own.
“Why can’t we use it for class? What’s it about?”
“You.” Kyungsoo hums and Chanyeol freezes his movements.
Kyungsoo giggles at that for some reason - probably because he’s nervous - and
looks over his shoulder at Chanyeol. Chanyeol is staring at him with an
unreadable expression, like he’s got something to say, but he doesn’t know how
to say it. Then he kisses him, just swoops down and kisses Kyungsoo so tenderly
that the guitar almost slips from Kyungsoo’s grip. It’s soft and sweet and
Kyungsoo feels like he’s loved. He gasps at the thought and Chanyeol just
smiles, kisses him over and over again.
What happens after that point happens so fast that Kyungsoo is having a
difficult time registering it. He could’ve sworn that he locked the door, but
instead it flies open and standing there in the doorway is a shocked student
who lets out a choke of surprise. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol jump so far away from
each other on the couch that the guitar almost falls out of Kyunsoo’s grip. He
refuses to look up and see who it is - his face is burning with shame and he
can’t bring himself to explain this… This compromising situation.
The weight at the other end of the couch shifts. Kyungsoo hears a set of
footsteps echoing down the hall and Chanyeol running out after him. He hears it
then, the name that Chanyeol calls out.
“Jongdae!”
The colour all but drains from Kyungsoo’s face. But the echoing of the
footsteps stop. Kyungsoo finally looks up to see Chanyeol still standing in the
doorway, he looks scared and frantic, just as Kyungsoo feels. Chanyeol takes a
deep breath, getting ready to explain and Kyungsoo quickly puts the guitar down
to join his side, to be there with him when it all goes to hell… because
they’ve been caught.
“Jongdae,” Chanyeol calls out softer this time.
Jongdae’s back visibly tenses, but he turns around anyway, rather stiffly, “W-
What?” he squeaks.
Chanyeol takes a deep breath, “Jongdae, don’t misunderstand what you saw here.”
he whispers, “Kyungsoo and I…” he swallows hard and looks down at Kyungsoo for
the moral support, “We’re- We’re dating.” he blurts.
Kyungsoo feels the world come crashing down around him, but Chanyeol is there
to pick him up, to hold onto him. Chanyeol’s hand squeezes around Kyungsoo’s
own as he looks back at a red-faced Jongdae.
“Kyungsoo is my boyfriend and I’m not afraid to admit it, because- because-”
Chanyeol takes a deep, shuddering breath, “Because I love him.”
Kyungsoo’s mouth runs dry and his eyes widen in surprise at the confession. His
heart feels like it’s going to burst out of his chest, but in a good way. Like
he could care less if they’ve been caught or they get expelled for this,
because Chanyeol loves him… And he’s pretty sure he loves Chanyeol too.
“I am in love with Kyungsoo.” Chanyeol says firmly, ignoring the way that
Kyungsoo inhales sharply, “And if you’re our friend, you’ll understand,
Jongdae. Please… Please understand.” he begs toward the end, tears welling in
his eyes, because he’s scared. They’re both scared.
Jongdae doesn’t say anything. He just shakes his head, turns on his heels and
scurries away. Kyungsoo breaks out into a sob, but Chanyeol holds him against
his chest.
“I-It’s okay, Soo,” Chanyeol coos through his tears, “We’re going to be okay.”
Kyungsoo’s tears blurring his vision when he tries to look up at Chanyeol, “I’m
in love with you too.” he cries, “Chanyeol, I love you.”
Chanyeol laughs through his own tears and holds Kyungsoo tight in his arms, “I
love you too, Soo.”
Kyungsoo and Chanyeol both just hope that this is enough, that the love they
feel for each other is enough to get them through this. Together.
                                      ***
They lay low for a long, long time. Chanyeol and Kyungsoo are best friends
outside of their dorm room and are boyfriends in the confines of that dorm and
that dorm alone. There’s no risks or chances taken between them, because if
they’re caught then they’ll be punished.
Winter turns to Spring, snow melting and leaving mud all over the campus
grounds. Kyungsoo wears his rain jacket and a pair of boots everywhere he goes
to avoid getting too dirty where Chanyeol wears his sneakers, splashing mud and
dirt onto the edge of his trousers between walks to and from the dorm. Kyungsoo
is always prepared for the disgustingly cold transitional weather of April with
an umbrella hooked over his arm while Chanyeol shrugs off the rain.
“You’re going to catch a cold.” Kyungsoo warns as the wind blows, shaking the
bare branches of the trees.
“Okay, mom.” Chanyeol shoots back, his tongue stuck out, “Whatever you say.”
“If you get sick, I’m not taking care of you!” Kyungsoo calls out as the clouds
loom overhead, threatening to rain on them.
Chanyeol lets out a boisterous laugh, causing a wide smile to spread on
Kyungsoo’s lips before he can stop it. He chuckles as he watches Chanyeol
walking ahead of him towards the campus. It’s late in the afternoon and most
people are walking in the opposite direction for the day, but Chanyeol insisted
on booking an extra studio hour so they could get some peace and quiet for
their writing.
“Yeol, I really think it’s going to rain!” Kyungsoo shouts over the loud
rushing of wind that nearly knocks him over.
“A little rain never hurt anybody!” Chanyeol yells back in his glee. Kyungsoo
snorts out a laugh and shakes his head, but he can’t shake off that smile he
wears when he’s with Chanyeol.
It’s almost as if on cue when Chanyeol calls back to Kyungsoo that the clouds
would open above them and let the rain pour down. And not a little bit either.
It’s a sudden onslaught of large water droplets falling heavily and so quickly
that before Kyungsoo gets his umbrella open, he’s practically already soaking
wet.
Chanyeol shrieks, his wide surprised eyes and flailing limbs as he runs toward
Kyungsoo and the security of his umbrella look like they’re right out of an
anime. Kyungsoo doesn’t laugh despite the thought that passes through his head,
instead allowing Chanyeol to take the umbrella from his grasp to hold it over
both of them. They must look really funny, Kyungsoo thinks, standing in the
middle of the rain looking like the most odd pair in existence beneath
Kyungsoo’s large, black umbrella.
The umbrella is almost a moot point at the moment, since they’re both dripping
wet anyway. Chanyeol snickers, looking down at Kyungsoo who’s looking up at him
with the same amount of amusement glimmering in his eyes. Water droplets drip
down from Chanyeol’s hair and slide over his skin - Kyungsoo thinks that he
looks so-
“Beautiful.” Kyungsoo whispers, “You’re beautiful.”
“W-What?” Chanyeol stammers, his face turning incredibly red right before
Kyungsoo’s eyes.
“You’re beautiful.” Kyungsoo says again, his own face heating up so quickly
that he feels like he might burst into flames.
Almost as suddenly as the downpour had started, Chanyeol’s hands are holding
Kyungsoo’s face and his lips are pressing softly against Kyungsoo’s own.
Kyungsoo gasps, his eyes fluttering closed as his stomach flips and sparks of
nervousness course through his body. The umbrella lands on the muddy ground of
the campus, forgotten.
When Chanyeol pulls away from him, Kyungsoo feels his heart following him,
“Come on, Soo.” Chanyeol smiles sheepishly, grabbing his hand and picking up
the umbrella.
They run into the nearest campus building, holding each other’s hands along the
way as the splash in puddles of mud. As terrified as Kyungsoo is that they’ve
kissed out in the open, he can’t help the giggles that pass through his lips as
he runs with Chanyeol into the closest shelter to them. Chanyeol looks back
over his shoulder and laughs at the expression on Kyungsoo’s face as he pushes
open the door to the small building.
“What is this?” Kyungsoo asks as he steps inside.
“An old storage shed,” Chanyeol laughs, shutting the door behind him, “They
used to keep sports equipment in here until they got a new storage spot closer
to the gym. So now it’s just empty, sorta.”
Kyungsoo looks around and giggles - he’s completely soaking wet and he’s cold.
Usually this would be a real mood dampener, but Chanyeol is with him so he
doesn’t feel so upset. He doesn’t get much time to explore the shed, because
within a second, Chanyeol is cornering him, using his height at an advantage.
“You know,” Chanyeol hums, trapping Kyungsoo between himself and the wall,
“You’re beautiful too.”
“Really?” Kyungsoo implores - there’s a challenge in his tone somewhere - as he
reaches out to drag a finger down Chanyeol’s chest, “You think so?”
Chanyeol shivers under the touch and from the cold of his wet clothes, “I know
so.” he whispers, low and heady in Kyungsoo’s ear.
The hairs on the back of Kyungsoo’s neck stand up on end and he wants to groan
from the suggestive implication of Chanyeol’s words.It doesn’t help that he can
feel himself coming to life in his boxers when Chanyeol presses kisses along
his neck, lips brushing over sensitive spots. Kyungsoo feels himself quickly
coming undone under Chanyeol’s mouth and he’s had enough, really, of waiting.
“Chanyeol.” he breathes.
“Mm?”
“I want you.”
Chanyeol leans back enough to stare into Kyungsoo’s eyes. His own are hooded
and his pupils are completely blown. Kyungsoo knows that he wants it too, wants
to stop waiting around.
“I want you too.” Chanyeol whispers, caressing Kyungsoo’s cheek at the same
moment he slots his knee between Kyungsoo’s thighs, “I’ve wanted you for a long
time.”
Kyungsoo groans, throwing his head back against the hardwood of the shed’s
wall, “M-Me too,” he whimpers, feeling his dick harden against the pressure of
Chanyeol’s thigh.
“Should we-” Chanyeol bites his lip, he looks scared and hesitant, “Should we
stop?”
“Do you want to?” Kyungsoo asks, looping his arms around Chanyeol’s neck.
“N-No,” Chanyeol admits, burying his face in Kyungsoo’s neck, “Is that okay?”
Kyungsoo laughs breathlessly and nods, “Do you- Do you have anything?”
Chanyeol swallows hard - Kyungsoo watches the way that his adam’s apple bobs
when he does - and nods, “I do…” he says, embarrassed, “I have- um- lube. In my
bookbag. I keep it in my bookbag so no one else will find it.” he explains and
Kyungsoo places a kiss against his cheek.
“Go get it,” he breathes as he slips his arms away from Chanyeol and begins to
unbuckle his belt.
Chanyeol trips over himself as he reaches out to find his bag in the darkness
of the shed. He finds it, eventually, and with some help from his cell phone,
he’s able to find a small bottle at the bottom of his bag. When he turns to
look back at Kyungsoo, Kyungsoo already has his blazer stripped off and his
pants shucked to the floor.
As he approaches, Chanyeol shrugs out of his blazer and lets it fall to the
floor of the shed. He could care less about it at this point, because Kyungsoo
is almost naked and waiting for him against a wall. How could he care about
anything else in this moment other than Kyungsoo?
They kiss, open-mouthed and wet with their tongues passing over one another’s.
It’s messy and hot and too much all at once, but Kyungsoo’s body is thrumming
with the anticipation. Between their kisses, Chanyeol’s shirt comes undone and
falls to the floor along with Kyungsoo’s, so they can grope each other shyly
with inexperienced hands. And they want, they want so, so much, to have each
other right now that they forget momentarily that they’re not allowed to be
this way or to have these feelings.
Kyungsoo works Chanyeol’s fly open, pulling his pants down to his mid thighs so
he can take Chanyeol’s dick out of his boxers and stroke him. Chanyeol whimpers
at the touch, precum already gathering at the slit so when Kyungsoo thumbs at
it, his hand ends up coated.
“Oh, shit,” Chanyeol whines, bucking into Kyungsoo’s fist, “Shit, Soo.” he
moans, grabbing Kyungsoo by the shoulder as he fucks into his hand.
“I want-” Kyungsoo lets out a shuddering breath, staring at Chanyeol’s huge
cock, “I want you to fuck me.”
Chanyeol chokes on a moan, “Kyungsoo I don’t… I don’t want that. I want to make
love to you. I want to love you.” he whispers into his ear.
Kyungsoo sighs as Chanyeol’s fingers begin to pull his underwear down, “Yes,
please- Love me- Make love to me.” he all but moans as he’s left naked for
Chanyeol to ravish.
So Chanyeol does exactly that. He uses the lube he’s got with him, all of it,
to prepare Kyungsoo with his long fingers. Kyungsoo is left shaking in a matter
of minutes, his thighs trembling as Chanyeol pumps his fingers in and out at a
slow pace that has him close to begging. Chanyeol is so lost in the way that
Kyungsoo’s delicious, puckered rim sucks his fingers inside that he almost
would rather make Kyungsoo come from just his fingers alone. Except Kyungsoo is
crying, begging, for Chanyeol to love him.
When Chanyeol stands, he lifts Kyungsoo with him, hooking his legs around his
hips. Kyungsoo’s whole body is wracked with nerves and anticipation as Chanyeol
lets him sink down slowly on his cock. The head catches and Kyungsoo seethes
for a moment, before he’s adjusted to the stretch and then sinks down further
on him. The second that Kyungsoo is seated on Chanyeol’s dick, they both look
each other in the eyes with hesitant lust and tender adoration.
“I love you.” Kyungsoo blurts out, squeezing his legs around Chanyeol.
Chanyeol smiles, “I love you too.” he whispers, squeezing Kyungsoo in his arms,
“I’m gonna show you just how much I love you.” he sighs as he fucks up into
Kyungsoo’s ass slowly, “Gonna show you every day.”
Kyungsoo cries out, throws his head back against the shed so that it bangs
against the wood. Chanyeol is so big and fills him so good, too good. He
whimpers as Chanyeol thrusts up again and he bounces as best as he can, trying
to ride his length so that it’ll hit his prostate.
“C-Come on, Yeol, love me- love me so good.” Kyungsoo encourages between deep,
passionate kisses.
“Soo,” Chanyeol moans, pressing his forehead against Kyungsoo’s shoulder,
“You’re tight, so tight. And warm. Fuck, you’re so warm.” he gasps out as he
thrusts in again and again, harder each time he does.
“Y-Yes, Yes!” Kyungsoo chokes, digging his blunt nails into Chanyeol’s
shoulders, “H-Harder!”
“Oh God,” Chanyeol huffs, pushing so deep inside of Kyungsoo that he finally
hits Kyungsoo’s prostate.
Kyungsoo nearly screams and he swears he sees stars, “There! Sh-Shit! Chanyeol,
right there!”
“So tight, Soo,” Chanyeol whines, pushing in again and abusing Kyungsoo’s
prostate on every, “You’re so fucking hot-” he chokes out as he thumbs at
Kyungsoo’s perky, pink nipples.
“F-Fuck!” Kyungsoo chokes on his moans as Chanyeol gives his body so much
attention, so much love that it leaves him shaking and weak, “I’m gonna- I’m
gonna come!”
“Yes,” Chanyeol groans, pinching Kyungsoo’s nipple, “Come for me, Soo, come all
over me.”
“Y-Yeol,” Kyungsoo cries out.
Chanyeol’s cock hitting his prostate and Chanyeol’s dirty words make him
convulse into his orgasm. His dick jerks as he comes all over his stomach and
Chanyeol’s and he feels his ass hole fluttering around Chanyeol’s cock,
clamping down tighter around him. A rush of euphoria fills Kyungsoo’s mind and
body as he looks into Chanyeol’s eyes and finds that Chanyeol is looking at him
like he’s the most precious thing in the world.
“Come inside me.” Kyungsoo whispers, clenching his ass around Chanyeol’s cock.
Chanyeol chokes, pushes his face back into the crook of Kyungsoo’s neck and
fucks deep into the tight heat of Kyungsoo’s ass. It feels good, so damn good,
when he comes inside of Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo whimpers as Chanyeol pulls his cock
out and he can feel come dripping from his ass as Chanyeol sets him back down
on the ground.
“Soo,” Chanyeol breathes out, “I love you.” he says, kissing Kyungsoo’s nose.
Kyungsoo smiles, his lips taking that heart shape that makes Chanyeol
positively melt, “I love you too.” he replies, kissing Chanyeol back.
They’re both a little wobbly and a little out of breath, but they’re smiling
anyway. They’re smiling at each other and they’re giggling far too much for two
boys that just fucked in a shed. But that’s okay. It’s okay, because they’re
with each other and they love each other. And who cares? Who cares if they’re
having sex? It’s their bodies, it’s their feelings, it’s their love. Why should
anyone care at all?
Chanyeol chuckles and brushes his wet bangs out of his forehead, “Should we
bother going to the studio now?”
“Actually,” Kyungsoo smiles sheepishly as he picks his clothes off the ground
of the shed, “I have an idea for our song.”
“You do?” Chanyeol asks with a brilliant smile, his rows of teeth on full
display.
Kyungsoo licks his lips and nods, “It might be risky.”
“Hey, whatever it is, I’m sticking with you.” Chanyeol grins.
                                      ***
The end of the term comes up very quickly. Everything finally thaws and the
grass is green again. At least it’s warm enough to go outside without the need
for oversized jackets or ugly colour coordinated accessories, like scarves or
mittens. By some crazy miracles, Kyungsoo has survived the year.
Almost.
“Hey.” Jongdae says softly after Literature class has ended.
Kyungsoo looks up at him confused, “Me?”
Jongdae clears his throat, “Yeah, you… Can we talk?”
“Uh,” Kyungsoo looks around for any signs of other life to see if maybe he can
avoid this conversation, because he’s sure that after months of avoidance that
this can only be awkward as all hell, “Ok.” he relents when he discovers that
they’re completely alone.
“I’m sorry,” Jongdae blurts, “For making it seem like I didn’t support you or
Minseok or Chanyeol or Luhan. I’m sorry things fell apart, but I’ve been
confused, really confused, for the better half of my high school years so far
and when I realized that there were others… Others like me, well I got scared.”
he says it all in such a rush that Kyungsoo isn’t sure he’s heard him
correctly.
Kyungsoo blinks, “What?”
Jongdae laughs awkwardly, painfully, and scratches the back of his head, “I
just- I’ve had these feelings for… For someone-”
“Junmyeon-hyung.” Kyungsoo realizes it suddenly like it was obvious this whole
time even though he couldn’t see it, “You like Junmyeon-hyung.”
Jongdae chokes on air, “I- How do you- What-” he sputters, his cheeks turning
bright, cherry red.
“It’s okay.” Kyungsoo babbles, “You’re allowed to, you know, like him. To like
boys. And I understand why you would sort of shut us out. You’re scared and I…
I know what that’s like. I was scared, so scared, of my feelings, but it’s
okay. We’re allowed to like who we want to like so don’t… Don’t let anything
hold you back.”
“What if-”
“Don’t second guess yourself,” Kyungsoo says with a small smile, “Junmyeon-
hyung… I think he likes you too, Jongdae. Like the he-wants-to-kiss-you-all-
the-time kind of like.”
Jongdae lets out a relieved laugh and grabs Kyungsoo to hug him, “I’m sorry I
ruined our friendship because of this.”
“You didn’t,” Kyungsoo reassures, running a soothing hand down Jongdae’s back,
“I promise. This is what friends are for, okay?”
Jongdae sniffles, “Okay.” he says, letting Kyungsoo go, “I’m… I’m glad that
we’re still friends.”
“Make sure you tell everything you just said to me to Minseok and Luhan too,
alright? They need your support. We need to be here for each other.”
“Of course. Of course I will. Thank you, Kyungsoo.”
Maybe, Kyungsoo thinks, things are starting to look up for him and for everyone
else at the school who likes boys, or who likes boys and girls too. He’s
pessimistically optimistic when he and Chanyeol complete the recording of their
song. It’s about young love, about young boys in love. It’s a song that they
know they’re probably not supposed to write at a school as old fashioned as
this one, but they do it anyway. And they’re confident in their song, they’re
really quite proud.
That doesn’t mean that they’re any less terrified about turning it in.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Chanyeol whispers, nervously, as he watches
their teacher walking around the room to collect students’ songs in various
formats. Theirs is on a USB that Kyungsoo has clutched between his hands so
tight that it’s leaving marks on his palms.
Kyungsoo nods, “Yes. Do you?”
“Yes.” Chanyeol says, “We’re in this together.”
“Boys,” their teacher says clearing his throat, “Project?” he inquires.
Kyungsoo spares one last glance at Chanyeol who nods in approval, “Here it is,
Sir.” he says, handing him the USB. There’s no turning back now.
After class, back at their dorm, Chanyeol cups Kyungsoo’s face between his
hands and kisses him.
“That one is for the courage you had today.”
Kyungsoo smiles and pulls Chanyeol in for another kiss.
“That one is for staying by my side.”
They’re summoned to their music professor’s office a few days later via a pink
slip note that’s handed to them by another student. It’s scary, for them both,
knowing that this will probably be what expels them from the school. They go
together in silence.
“Boys, take a seat.” the professor greets as he opens the door to his office.
Chanyeol and Kyungsoo are both hesitant, but when the professor sits down at
his desk, they follow in suit. The chairs at the other end of the desk are
plastic and uncomfortable, which for some reason makes Kyungsoo anticipate the
worst. He’s dreading when the professor asks for an explanation, because he
knows that he will, before he makes a call to the headmaster of the school.
It’s only a matter of time now.
“I listened to your song last night.” he begins, holding up the familiar USB in
his hand, “Care to explain the meaning of your project for me?”
Kyungsoo and Chanyeol exchange a look of terror and determination before
looking back at the teacher. This is it.
“It’s about two boys who are in love,” Kyungsoo says slowly, his voice cracks,
because his throat is dry, “It starts about a boy who discovers he has feelings
for another boy and-”
“And it ends with the other boy admitting his feelings too.” Chanyeol adds when
Kyungsoo looks like he’s about to panic.
The professor hums and nods slowly as he reaches out for his wallet sitting on
top of his desk. Chanyeol reaches out to squeeze Kyungsoo’s hand subtly between
them. They’re both clamming up from their nerves and the anxiety that this
meeting is causing them makes their hearts pound nearly out of their chests.
And then, suddenly, there’s a photo of two men in tuxes staring at them - it’s
a photograph that their professor has pulled out of his wallet.
“This is my husband.” he says, like it’s nothing, “He loved your song.”
Kyungsoo bursts into tears of relief.
Their professor nudges a box of tissues closer to Kyungsoo and smiles
apologetically for having worried them, “Listen, boys, I know how much bravery
it took for you to pass this project into me and I am very proud of you both.
Unfortunately, some of my colleagues might not think the same way as myself and
a few other teachers on staff. As much as I’d love for this school to change
overnight, it won’t.” he says with a sigh, “The headmasters don’t even know
that I’m married, let alone to a man.”
Chanyeol frowns, “What should we do, Sir?”
The professor offers them another consoling smile, “Nothing, why should you
have to do anything at all? Your feelings are yours and no one else can tell
you how to feel. Just know that my classroom and this office are safe spaces
for you and for any other students you know that needs one. It’s going to be
hard to keep it a secret, believe me, I know, but trust me when I say that it
gets better.”
                                      ***
Summer comes quickly and the bright heat of the sun is enough to melt the
students. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol shift into their short-sleeve uniform shirts
and shorts for the later months of the school year. When final exams are over,
Kyungsoo and Chanyeol are both relieved, but also a little heartbroken. As the
school year ends, the campus closes for the summer, which means they have to
part, despite their reluctance to do so.
“I’ll visit you every weekend,” Chanyeol says, holding Kyungsoo’s hands, “We
can kiss whenever we want then.”
Kyungsoo laughs when he spies Jongin making a weird face, “Don’t be jealous.”
“I’m not,” Jongin scoffs, “I’ve got Sehun.”
Kyungsoo rolls his eyes and looks back up at Chanyeol, “I’ll invite you to come
to my family’s summer vacation home sometime too. You and everyone else of
course.”
“You won’t forget me right?” Chanyeol asks shyly and Kyungsoo actually laughs
so hard that it springs tears to the corners of his eyes.
“How could I?” he asks with a smile that makes warmth bloom in Chanyeol’s
chest.
He swoops in for a peck on Kyungsoo’s lips, “That’s for when you told me that
we’re allowed to like each other.” Chanyeol whispers.
Kyungsoo grins and kisses him back, “That’s for when you said you’d stay by my
side.”
“Gross,” Jongin coughs, “Get a fucking room.”
“We’re in our room!” Kyungsoo and Chanyeol shout back at the same time before
the trio bursts into laughter.
Next year, Kyungsoo thinks as he looks up at Chanyeol’s smiling face, next year
things won’t be so rocky. Their professor was right, the school isn’t going to
change overnight, but Kyungsoo likes to think that as long as he has Chanyeol,
that it won’t really matter in the end. Who he loves and is loved by in return
is no one’s business, but his own. Next year, they’ll make the most of it -
himself, Chanyeol, and everyone who’s just like them.
Because boys do kiss other boys.
And that’s okay.
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