Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/3413957. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage Category: M/M Fandom: Shingeki_no_Kyojin_|_Attack_on_Titan Relationship: Levi/Eren_Yeager Character: Eren_Yeager, Levi_ackerman, Mikasa_Ackerman, Armin_Arlert, Petra_Ral Additional Tags: Oneshot, Smut, Porn_with_some_plot, Angst, Canonical_Character_Death, Alternate_Universe_-_Canon_Divergence, ereri, ACWNR_hints Stats: Published: 2015-02-22 Words: 5839 ****** Between Hope and Despair ****** by SavingPrivateJaeger Summary In which the corporal and his charge find themselves in an unusual situation: one drowning in grief, and the other unable to bear the thought of losing him. Notes This is my first fic in the fandom. It takes place in about episode 22 of the anime, between the Survey Corp's return from the 57th expedition and the summons to the capital. See the end of the work for more notes *the year of our Lord 850, hours after the death of Levi squad*             The sun had fallen behind the walls of the Karanese district by the time the scouts--those who hadn’t gone home to their families to celebrate their safe return and mourn their losses--began unloading their wagons in front of headquarters. Eren Jaeger, having already shifted into a titan more than enough for one day, was still barely able to stand. His adopted sister Mikasa hovered near the wagon that had borne him from the field, where he still lay with his arm slung over his eyes as it had been since they re-entered the gate. Eren’s best friend Armin stood nearby, leading the prostrate titan shifter’s horse and waiting for further orders from Corporal Levi, who just then came back from taking the last armload of supplies inside.   “It’s time to get this brat to bed,” he said to neither Mikasa nor Armin in particular. Levi’s horse whickered as the corporal himself climbed into the wagon and grabbed an end of the stretcher beneath Eren. After a brief pause, he looked at Mikasa and raised an eyebrow.   With a nod and a hard look, the young woman climbed onto the wagon with him and lifted the other end. Eren finally seemed to notice their presence and moved his arm from his face to investigate the disturbance. His eyes were red and still wet, but he hurriedly wiped them on his dirty sleeve. “We’re taking you into the barracks so you can rest,” Mikasa told him. She furrowed her brow, her adopted brother’s pain evident to her. Eren nodded and the duo team-lifted him to the edge of the wagon. Armin released his friend’s horse, which trotted gaily away to join Levi’s, and readied himself to assist the pair as they climbed from the wagon and prepared to lower Eren from it. Levi lifted the handles again when his feet touched the ground and Armin braced the weight and took the handles from Mikasa as she climbed down. His arms trembled, and the girl hurried to reclaim the other half of the stretcher from him.   “I’ll go get his door open,” Armin said softly.   “Thank you,” Mikasa mumbled and followed the corporal as he led the way backwards to the door and nudged it open with his shoulders. Eren remained silent as he watched them, doing his best to keep his weight balanced. Mikasa looked down to meet her adopted brother’s eyes and offered an encouraging smile. He shook his head gently and covered his face again. Levi looked down at Eren’s feet and didn’t meet either of their eyes as he led the way down a winding hall inside the door to the titan shifter’s quarters.   Inside, Eren rolled himself from the stretcher to his bed and faced the wall. He declined the offer of food, still slightly feverish. Levi rolled up the stretcher and, clutching it in his palms, left the two of them without a word. Mikasa brought water and sat with her adopted brother until she was certain he had fallen asleep before getting a bite to eat and retreating to her own room.   *** Eren awoke in the throes of a nightmare as a distant, early summer storm was beginning to make its presence known somewhere beyond the wall. Trembling, he sat up and mentally willed the cold sweat covering his skin to disappear. He moved toward the window to peer out as he shoved images of the day’s horrors out of his mind. Lightning lit up the sky, showing the silhouettes of trees outside that were just beginning to stir in the light breeze preluding the storm.   Slam! The titan shifter’s head spun quickly to the far left of his field of vision, where he caught a flash of movement. The stables? Why-? It’s after midnight. Could one of the horses have panicked and escaped?In a sudden surge of pity for the poor beasts, Eren stood on wobbly legs and swung his Scouting Legion cloak over his shoulders. As he clasped the brooch at his throat he quietly slipped from his room. Blind in the dark, Eren wandered through the eerily silent barracks building to the main entrance. The long wooden beam that rested in notches across the door and the wall on each side had been lifted out of place, leaving the building unlocked. What the hell?   Eren pushed the door open and stepped out into the humid air, glad he had taken the time to put his cloak on; light raindrops were alighting upon his cheeks. He glanced toward the stables, clutching his cloak more tightly around himself as the wind began to whip up a little stronger. In the darkness, the titan shifter could barely make out a lone figure coaxing a horse from its stall by the bridle. The individual had yet to notice the new presence only yards away.   Eren had made up his mind to call out when a loud clap of thunder and the whistling wind frightened his voice to a mere lump in his throat. In seconds the night burned blue with lightning, and the figure glanced to the sky while the exposed horse stomped its hooves restlessly. Eren could just make out his face. Corporal Levi?  He took a few steps toward his superior as the man mounted his horse and gently drove his heels into its side. The horse began to trot away toward the general direction of the gate.   Where the hell is he going? He’s going to get himself killed!Eren rushed to his horse’s stall, and hoisted himself onto the animal’s bare back, driving him into hot pursuit. Upon reaching the city’s main road, he caught sight of Levi as he was leading his horse through one of the doors that led to the top of the wall. Eren dismounted behind a house and led his horse on the same path, finding the small door that led outside the wall wide open. Levi…Lightning flashed repeatedly, the bolts in the sky revealing the figure in the distance, retreating at top speed. Eren clambered back onto his horse and pressed his heels into his sides. ”Hya!”   The horse bolted, nearly throwing Eren from his back. He grabbed a chunk of the poor horse’s mane just before he slid down his back. He hadn’t gone too far when the driving rain was making it difficult to keep focused on Levi’s position ahead. He just barely registered shouts from the top of the wall behind them.   Eren rode after his superior until the wall was out of sight, his thighs were aching, and the storm was at full power. He could see the looming castle that was the Scouting Legion’s headquarters outside of the wall, and Levi about a hundred yards ahead on the road leading to it. Suddenly, a bright bolt of lightning turned the sky to an ocean of blue and indigo, and let out a deafening crackas it struck the bark from a tree in the woods nearby.   Eren’s horse jumped, but he was already stroking his neck and whispering softly. He glanced up just in time to see Levi’s horse on its hind legs, dumping the man from its back, almost in slow motion. The titan shifter’s chest tightened. “Corporal!” Eren urged his trembling horse forward at top speed and when he was close, he leapt from his back, stifling a cry as he felt his ankle twist slightly. It pained him as walked the last two steps and fell to the ground beside his superior. “Corporal, are you all right?” Eren turned Levi gently onto his back. The man’s grey eyes were open wide, and he blinked a few times. He let out a shaky breath; the corporal only appeared to be stunned.   “E-Eren,” he said quietly. “What-what are you doing here?” The man tried to sit up, his steel gaze upon Eren but before it had its desired effect, it crumbled under a grimace of pain and he clutched his side, lowering himself to the ground and breathing heavily. “Why are you here?”   “Corporal, no one should be out here alone, especially in a storm,” he replied, shouting a little over the hissing of the wind and rain around them. “We have to get inside-“ Eren slipped an arm under both of Levi’s to support him, but it was difficult due to their height difference. He whistled to his horse to follow, and the creature did so obediently and allowed Eren to lead him into the stable. Eren propped Levi against the small structure and quickly threw some hay into the stall as he bolted the top and bottom doors.   Eren tried to support his superior again, but instead lifted him into his arms. “What the fuckdo you think you’re doing, brat?” Levi struggled against him, but grimaced in pain again.   “Sir, you’re soaking wet and you’re hurt. We have to get a fire going.”   “Tch.”   Inside the base, Eren placed Levi on a small couch in the common room and set about starting a fire. “Can you stand?”   Levi nodded and slowly got to his feet, favoring his left ankle. He thanked his lucky stars that Eren hadn’t noticed that. The man inhaled sharply, and his voice came out in a shaky whisper. “I’m fine Jaeger.”   “You don’t sound like it, sir.”   “Just what were you doing outside at this hour, anyway?” Levi slowly lowered himself back down onto the couch.   “I could ask you the same, sir.”   “Don’t question me, brat,” the corporal snapped.   Eren blew gently on the small twigs he’d lit in the fireplace until a small flame began to rise. “You slammed your horse’s stall door open a little too hard, sir. It was too loud to pass off as the wind so early in the storm.”   Levi sighed and grumbled something about Eren’s intelligence. Ignoring him, Eren got to his feet slowly, favoring his injured ankle. He used the poker to stoke the other branches to flame. The two men were silent as the flames burned to a roar, and Eren threw in a few small logs. Levi shivered. “D-do you think we could move this couch closer to the fire?”   “I’ll move it, corporal. You’re in no condition.” Thunder cracked loudly outside again. Levi let out a soft growl of protest, but cleared the few steps to a nearby living chair with some difficulty. Eren dragged the couch nearer and watched as Levi walked over to it more steadily, and lowered himself onto his back. Satisfied that his superior was all right, the new recruit unclasped his cloak and placed it spread-eagle over the back of the living chair. “Corporal I’m going to find blankets. I’ll be right back.”   “Hurry,” Levi whispered. But he didn’t think Eren could hear him. He continued to shiver.   The teen returned a few moments later with his arms full, and walked awkwardly to avoid tripping. When he entered the room, all was silent except for the crackling of the fire and the soft rustle of fabric. Levi was stripped of his cloak and shirt and was in the process of hanging them over the backs of wooden chairs that Eren swore weren’t there before. “Corporal, you should be lying down!” Eren dropped all of the pillows and bed linens he’d been carrying and rushed over to grab the man’s shoulders and steer him back to the couch. “Where the hell did you get those chairs?”   Before he could be forced down, however, Levi caught Eren tightly by one of his wrists and held him at arm’s length. “The dining room, you shithead, now calm down! It’s just some bruised ribs. I’m going to be fine, but we need to get our wet clothes off before we catch our deaths. Oh, and get those blankets off of the floor. It’s filthy.”   “Y-yes…sir.” Levi released Eren, who backed away to gather the discarded linens. He placed two of the heaviest blankets and one of the pillows on the couch, and a blanket on the floor by the fire to sleep on, along with a pillow and a blanket to cover himself. He stripped naked and wrapped himself in it as he walked over to the chairs where Levi had begun hanging his clothes. The corporal walked past him, completely unclothed and unashamed, and Eren flushed scarlet. He swore he felt his eyes expand to the size of saucers when they caught sight of his superior’s flaccid and exposed penis. Oh my God, Eren stop staring, stop staring, youhaveto stop staring now before-   “Eren are you staring at my dick?” Levi climbed onto the couch and draped the blanket over his shoulders, back, and exposed manhood.   “N-no sir,” Eren yelped as he rushed over and deposited himself onto the floor in his makeshift bed. No different than the barracks, Eren.He sighed inwardly. But itisdifferent, isn’t it?   “Whatever,” the corporal replied dismissively, trying to deny that he was just as red as Eren, and the fact that his skin tingled at the thought of the younger paying him any kind of attention. When he felt he had control of himself, he lay down on his back and covered his body again as he resituated the blanket. He was still able to look down at the new recruit. A dull pain shot up his right side, causing him to flinch, but he ignored it. “Why did you follow me, Jaeger? The only reason I won’t punish you when we get back is because you’re supposed to be under my watch, anyway.”   “Because-“ Eren lowered his voice. “After today, you shouldn’t be alone.”   “What’s that, brat? Speak up!”   “I-it doesn’t matter! What matters is that if I hadn’t followed you, you probably would have died tonight,” Eren retorted.   Levi’s pale lips pressed into a thin line. His storm-grey eyes betrayed nothing when he spoke. “You went beyond your limit today. You should have stayed in bed until you got your strength back.”   “I’m fine,” Eren said, bristling. “You’re the one who needs babysitting. Riding out in a thunderstorm, in the middle of the night, no less. Jesus Christ, Levi, you’re m-“ The titan shifter covered his mouth when he realized his mistake.   Levi was already sitting straight up, his blanket only covering him from the waist down. “Whatdid you call me?”   “C-corporal I’m sorry it just slipped out-!” Eren recoiled from him, though he wasn’t even close enough to do him any harm. Levi’s expression softened momentarily, remembering how Eren had reacted after he beat him in the courtroom with regret tugging at his heart. He didn’t respond he just lay down on the couch again, pulling the blanket back up to his chest and clenching it between his calloused hands.   “Get some rest, Jaeger.” He rolled over to face the back of the couch.   “Why did you come here?”   “I…don’t know. To mourn, perhaps.”   Eren knew that the world’s wild creatures only went to be alone when it was time to die. The corporal was such a creature, in a sense. The titan shifter’s chest tightened and his breath left him at the thought. His nightmares descended down the same dark road, and one time he was covered in blood that wasn’t his own and crouched on the ground holding Levi’s battered form as warmth left it, and the next he was in his titan form and had a wire from the 3D maneuver gear pressed tight to Levi’s throat, cutting off his airway. The man’s grey eyes showed no pain, no fear. He didn’t even struggle; he had his blades in his hands, but his arms were limp at his sides. *** Levi was just beginning to fall asleep when Eren suddenly started screaming and writhing violently. He sat straight up, panting heavily, his eyes wide with unspeakable terror. Levi rushed to his side, stricken with horror at the titan shifter’s sudden outburst. He was clad in pants, Eren noticed, and by his location assumed he had been trying to wake him. “Corporal!” The titan shifter couldn’t stop the tears anymore, couldn’t stop himself from reaching out to touch the man to make sure he was there. Unthinking, he flung himself onto his superior’s lap, his lower half covered only by his blanket.   “Eren…” Levi tried to calm his heart before it beat out of his chest as he gently ran his fingers through the younger’s chestnut locks, clung to him hard, nails biting the soft flesh of his side when pain shot through his body again. Eren whimpered, his body shaking with quiet sobs. The corporal held him quietly until the teen’s body was still. I can’t do this.“Eren you-you should-.”   “R-right,” Eren replied huskily. He flushed with shame, peeled away from Levi, and lowered himself back to the floor after he added more wood to the fire. He tightened the blanket around himself as if it were keeping him alive. Levi hadn’t moved from the spot, the cold from the stone floor beginning to seep into his bones. “How long were you trying to wake me?”   “Not long,” Levi said. “I was finally on the road to dreamland when you were suddenly screaming your head off.”   “Sorry.” Eren whispered. “It’s just…I watched them die…all over again and then you….you were…and..and I-“He bit his lip, trying to will away the tears burning his eyes and the sudden wave of nausea as the images came back as vivid as if they had just happened.   “Tell me, Eren.   He looked away from the man’s face, and happened to glance down, noting that a deep purple bruise was rearing its ugly head on Levi’s right side. “Are you sure you’re all right?” Eren reached out to touch it, but Levi slapped his hand away.   “Don’t. It…hurts.”   “Corporal I’m sorry…”   “Just tell me what happened in this nightmare of yours.”   “I tried to kill you and you weren’t even fighting me.”   Levi’s grey eyes widened, and then his expression softened. “I probably wouldn’t fight you.”   “But it’s supposed to be the other way around! If I go berserk you’re supposed to kill me! It’s not supposed to be you giving up and me…” Eren choked on a quiet sob. He felt lightheaded and nauseous again.   The older man stood, placing a hand on top of Eren’s head to comfort him, but he looked away. There was a crack in his mask. “Go back to sleep.”   Eren lowered his head and whispered, “Yes, corporal.”   His superior went back to his place on the couch, and Eren curled up on his makeshift bed on the floor by the fireplace. He’d never felt more like a dog in his life.   ***   The teen’s thoughts soon drifted in other directions, and he was between sleeping and dreaming when he was awakened by a new sound that wasn’t the low hiss of the flames beside him. Eren was instantly conscious. He lay there in silence, shivering lightly as thoughts of his earlier nightmare returned to him. He stayed still, listening. Corporal is…crying? The titan shifter sat up slowly and crawled the few feet to the couch so his shadow wouldn’t alert Levi to the fact that he was awake.   ***   Try as Levi might, sleep was evading him with sick determination. His entire body was still numb with shock from the days’ events and the pain shooting up his side grew more piercing the longer he stayed still. He shifted his position on the couch again and adjusted the pants he’d just pulled back onto his hips. Eren stirred a little in his sleep and the man watched with a detached longing, willing away images of what the teen would look like beneath him. Human attachments in this line of work are suicide…he could no longer contain his grief.   ***   Eren crept closer and sure enough, Levi’s smaller form was trembling with sobs that he silenced with the palm of his hand. He had yet to notice Eren on his knees on the floor next to the couch.   When Levi felt something warm pressed to his lower back through the blanket, he froze. “B-brat, go back to sleep,” he hiccupped, humiliation burning in his chest.     “Corporal Levi…” Eren slid his hand to the man’s shoulder, knowing no other way to deal with the situation than to comfort him.   The man spun on Eren and slapped his hand away, somehow managing to look intimidating glaring over his shoulder with moist eyes. Eren backed away, clutching his hand to his chest, and soon Levi was lying down again, eyes still red. After some internal debate, Eren sat himself down at the end of the couch.   “Listen, brat…” Levi sat up slowly and turned toward the fire. Eren moved closer to him.   “Corporal?”   “I want you to listen. It sounds like the weather’s calmed down, so I want you to gather your shit, get dressed, and get your ass back behind that wall. Do you understand me? I want to be alone.”   Eren bit his lip. I don’t trust him…I haven’t known him long, but I’ve never seen him act this way and I don’t trust him not to do something absolutely reckless.Levi watched him warily, but Eren had already made a decision. “No. I’m not leaving you in this state, corporal.”   Levi crouched down beside him like a cat ready to pounce, accusing finger already jabbing him in the chest. “What makes you think you have a choice, Eren? You always get your space when you want it, you always get peace and quiet, and now I want you to leave me so I can have mine.” Eren backed away from him until his lower back hit the arm of the couch. “I’m your superior and you’re going to fucking listen to me!”   “Corporal, you’re not yourself. I know you’ve been crushed by what happened today but you can’t just give u-“   “Crushed? Crushed?” Levi let out a short, sardonic laugh. “It’s the second time this has happened to me. Everyone familiar to me is just goneand I can’t live in a world like this, Eren. I’m not made to be a leader. I can’t throw away people’s lives and not care, and not miss them!That’s Erwin’s job not mine, Eren, please go…” He was practically on top of Eren, one hand on the arm of the couch beside his head and the other pressed against the back, one knee beside Eren’s hip and the other between his legs.   Eren swore his face had never been so hot. But Levi was trembling above him, his eyes as distant as if he were seeing another place and another time. The teen thought he’d cried enough that day, that his tear ducts simply couldn’t make any more of the confounded liquid. No, no it isn’t fair I didn’t know them as long, he needs this I can’t ever show him how I feel…”I’m sorry corporal. It’s my fault. All of it. Is that what you need to hear? Because I’ll say whatever it takes just don’t go!I could never lose Mikasa and Armin, but if you-if you left me…if you weren’t here anymore…” He reached out to place a hand on the bruise on Levi’s side, and at his soft gasp of pain, Eren couldn’t stop the tears from leaking down across his cheeks. “D-don’t leave me. You may have lost them but I have to replay their deaths in my head every night for the rest of my life!” Levi was too taken aback to respond. His stomach was doing flips. “Corporal!”    Eren wrapped his arms around his superior’s hips, pulling him into his lap to hold him protectively, to search his eyes for any sign that he would relent to his pleas, when suddenly Levi went wild. “Eren, stop!”He screwed his eyes shut and braced his hands on one of the younger’s bare shoulders, frantically trying to shove him away, scratching and writhing, deliberately avoiding Eren’s unusual blue-green eyes because his resolve was breaking. He stopped with a cry as agony laced from his side and through his entire body. “E-Eren please let me go.”    Eren murmured, “No corporal.”   “Brat-“ The older man tried to pull away again.   “Please don’t kill me…” Eren desperately angled Levi’s face toward his own and crushed their lips together in a bruising kiss before the man could say a word.   The corporal’s hesitation was minute, and he responded in kind, desperately nibbling and sucking on Eren’s lower lip. “Eren,” he whispered against the teen’s lips as he straddled his lap, “I can’t do this. Eren,” he hissed, but he didn’t even try to fight when said teen lay him down on the couch and straddled him. Eren claimed his superior’s lips again, clumsily tonguing for entrance. Levi’s lips parted, and he moaned when the taste of the young soldier finally entered his mouth.   Eren massaged his sides and Levi’s fingers twisted in his shaggy hair; they explored each other’s mouths heatedly, as if their lives were made up of mere moments. Too soon they had to separate for air. “Corporal…what’s happening?” Eren was panting.   Levi, trembling and body aflame, leaned up so he could speak into Eren’s ear. “I don’t know, Eren,” he breathed, and started nipping the teen’s sensitive lobe. “Just…please… don’t stop me…please…” His voice was barely audible.   “N-never…ah!” Levi was in the shifter’s lap again and began biting his way hungrily down Eren’s torso, stomach, and hips. “Corporal…” His erection was straining against the blanket confining it, and Levi’s grey eyes narrowed in frustration at the offending fabric. As he pulled it away, Eren’s cheeks flushed with more than just embarrassment; the older man was admiring the magnificent piece of flesh before him. Levi met Eren’s eyes and held his gaze as he lowered himself to the floor. Eren’s heart was slamming against the walls of his chest. He couldn’t believe that Corporal Levi was…sucking him off. He took the teen’s member fully into his mouth in one motion.   “Corporal!”Eren sat straight up and one hand flew to his superior’s hair, the other to the cushion of the couch beneath him for purchase. Just like that, Levi released the younger’s member. He loosened his grip on the man’s hair.   “Brat, when we’re like this, I dowant to hear my name,” he said softly, giving the youth a glare that held no malice. He went right back to the task he’d begun.   Eren cried out softly and dug his nails into Levi’s scalp. Levi moaned in approval, sending tortuous sensations shooting up Eren’s member. “L-Levi-“ he moaned wantonly, “d-do you like it rough?”   He hummed again, causing Eren to tighten his grip. Soon, he was a moaning, keening mess beneath the man’s talented mouth. He could hardly keep from bucking into it. Soon, Levi had him by his hips and was holding him down. But Eren had other ideas. “W-wait, I want to try something.” He moved his lips to the man’s ear. “Relax Levi…” Eren took his superior’s earlobe between his teeth and began nibbling and suckling gently.   Levi stroked the younger’s sides and tilted his head so he could kiss his way down his neck. When Eren found the sensitive spot at the base of Levi’s throat, it didn’t just feel good, it burned. Levi couldn’t stifle the cry that broke free from his lips. Eren, his senses tuned to Levi’s reactions, started favoring the spot with his teeth. When he had Levi trembling under him, Eren pulled away just enough to meet the corporal’s eyes as he slid his hand down the man’s chest and toward his throbbing erection. Levi just nodded, his senses gone out the window and replaced with pure, burning lust. God, it had been so long….I need to stop this…   And then Eren was stroking him. He hissed. Before long, Eren’s hand had been replaced with something else and Oh!Levi cried out and arched as Eren wasted no time and suckled his head into his mouth, returning the man’s earlier favor. “E-Eren…” He lowered a leg from the couch to give Eren more room. He took Levi the whole way into his mouth, and Levi shuddered when he felt the movement of the teen swallowing then gagging a little. He continued the motion for a few moments, until Levi could feel a familiar heat coiling in his belly.  He twisted his fingers into Eren’s hair. “Eren stop before I cum-” Eren held his hips down and continued his ministrations. Levi moved his grip to one of the Eren’s shoulders and the couch. He pressed his nails into his flesh, desperate for an anchor. “E-Eren,” he panted, “Eren!” He arched and let out an erotic moan as he spilled his seed into Eren’s eager mouth. Eren milked him dry and licked him clean.   He pulled off with a smirk. “How are you feeling, corporal?”   “Horny as fuck, you damn brat.” Sure enough, the older man’s member showed no signs of softening.   Eren drank in the sight of Levi, flushed, sweaty, and panting. “Oops.” He didn’t look the least bit sorry. “Uh…um…about what I wanted to try…”   “Hm?” Levi met his gaze questioningly.   Eren flushed scarlet. “Turn around and get on all fours.” Levi obliged without a word, and soon he felt the teenager’s tongue probing his entrance. He couldn’t stifle his moans as Eren plunged the soft, wet appendage in and out of him, making his inner ring of muscles twitch uncontrollably. The sensation shot straight down to his cock every time, making it harder than he could ever remember. When Eren pulled away, Levi couldn’t help the sound of frustration he let out and he all but spun around to see why. He didn’t expect to see Eren erotically sucking on his index finger and stroking his own swollen member with his other hand. His expression must have been hungry because Eren’s bright eyes turned inquisitive as he pulled his finger from his mouth and stopped the ministrations at his lower half. “What is it, corporal?”   “N-nothing. Get on with it.”   “Levi I knew you were an impatient man, but-“ Eren eased his finger back into his mouth and slowly, deliberately pumped it in and out.   Levi flushed. “Jaeger…”   “Yes, sir.” Eren probed Levi’s entrance with his fingertip, and eased it in. The initial burning and discomfort made Levi grit his teeth but he did his best to relax and even out his breathing. “So tight, Levi,” Eren murmured lustily as he probed further into the man’s resistant body, and began to thrust his finger as he felt his lover’s muscles loosen.   “Deeper, Eren.” Levi’s voice was husky and sensual, begging. Feeling more confident, Eren added another finger and began to stretch and scissor Levi. “I take it you’ve done this before?”   “No, but the guys in the barracks when we were recruits really…talked. Have you-?”   “I’ve done it to myself, but never with another man.” Eren’s eyes widened, and Levi took a few moments to admire how blown the titan shifter’s pupils were. “I’ve also heard the recruits talk, and I wanted to know what it felt like.”   “A-are you a virgin?” Eren was suddenly more than a little self-conscious, and embarrassed all over again at Levi’s frank admission to masturbating like this,and just to try it.     “No I’ve been with a few women.” His expression darkened, and Eren thought he changed the direction of the discussion rather quickly. “I can appreciate an attractive man, too, like Erwin, but you’re the only one I’ve ever wanted to fuck, let alone allow to fuck me.”   “I’m flattered c-Levi.” Eren smiled, but his expression changed when his mind clouded with darker thoughts. “Was one of the women….you loved Petra, didn’t you?” Levi suddenly looked down at the couch beneath him as if it were the most interesting object in the world. Eren pulled his fingers out quickly, earning a gasp of pain from Levi. “It’s too soon, corporal.” He moved away.   “Eren…” Levi crawled over to him. “She knew I liked you. I told her. It has to be you.” Their lips met again, and it was sloppy and desperate and Eren thrust a finger back in to Levi as soon as he resumed his position. “No,” Levi commanded, “make me feel it. I’m prepared enough.”   The titan shifter rose to his knees, moaning as he stroked himself to spread precum down his member. He lined himself against Levi’s entrance and pressed in until he bottomed out all in one thrust, shameless as he let out a loud moan. Levi cried out, tears in his eyes as he tossed his head back.   “S-so hot…Levi.” They rested for a few moments, their breathing heavy. Levi let a few tears fall as the burning eased.   “You can move,” the corporal choked. Eren complied readily and soon, they had a steady rhythm. “Eren…there’s a place inside….you’re so close, please, I need…” Eren changed his angle slightly, and Levi let out a pleasured cry of his young lover’s name. Within a few more thrusts, Levi was a wreck beneath him, moaning wantonly each time Eren struck his prostate.   “Oh God, Levi…” Eren could feel the tight heat of Levi’s body quickly pulling him closer and closer to orgasm. He leaned out over the smaller man and pressed his lips to spot where his neck and shoulder met as he reached down to stroke Levi in time with his thrusts. As Levi’s body began to writhe beneath his, he bit into his neck.   Levi came into Eren’s hand, screaming his name as his body arched tighter than a bowstring about to let loose an arrow. Eren’s cry of pleasure was muffled against the man’s neck as he rode out his orgasm. He pulled out a few moments later, panting and trembling. Levi collapsed and rolled over onto his back, his entire body flushed and his breaths labored. “Fucking hell.” He made a face as Eren’s cum dripped from his abused hole and down onto the couch.   Eren nodded quietly and glanced down at Levi. “Are you all right?”   “Yes, but I don’t think I’ll be able to shit properly for a week. Or ride a horse.”   “I guess you can lead the horses and I’ll ride one.” Levi gave the youth a gentle kick with his uninjured leg. Eren laughed.   “Come here, brat.” Eren obeyed, and the two pressed tightly together on the small couch. “If you die out there, I’m gonna off myself, got it? So you’d better quit being so damn reckless.”   Eren smiled as he held the man against him; he knew that was the closest he’d ever get to a confession.         End Notes Please point out any mistakes, anything that sounds too cheesy, etc. If y'all like it, perhaps I'll continue it and try to follow canon plot. 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