Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/9640184.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M, Other
  Fandom:
      Hetalia:_Axis_Powers
  Relationship:
      Canada/Prussia/Scotland_(Hetalia), Canada/Prussia_(Hetalia), Prussia_
      (Hetalia)/Scotland_(Hetalia), Canada_(Hetalia)/Scotland_(Hetalia), South
      Italy/Spain_(Hetalia)
  Character:
      Canada_(Hetalia), Prussia_(Hetalia), Scotland_(Hetalia), South_Italy_
      (Hetalia), America_(Hetalia)
  Additional Tags:
      Alternate_Universe_-_Hogwarts, Hufflepuff_Canada, Slytherin_Prussia,
      Slytherin_Scotland, Quidditch, no_explict_smut_until_all_involved_are_17,
      at_least, Soulmates, Kinda, bless_Lovino_for_being_a_kickass_friend
      honestly, Human_Names_Used, written_in_parts, Sorry_Not_Sorry, half-human
      character, Polyamory, Cross-Posted_on_FanFiction.Net, Angst_with_a_Happy
      Ending, Work_In_Progress, oh_god_why_am_i_like_this, they're_kinky_so
      fair_warning, it's_always_the_quiet_ones, Self-Destructive_Behavior
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-02-09 Updated: 2017-06-22 Chapters: 4/7 Words: 118165
****** Because I Want It All ******
by chaoticgoodlawyer
Summary
     Matthew's life sucks, but it's simple. Besides being all but
     invisible and dealing with his weird biology, all he has to do is
     study for his O.W.L.s. But after getting caught breaking curfew by a
     certain Slytherin boy, things get a lot more complicated. (Warning:
     Teenage Sexuality)
Notes
     Story title is from the Killers' "Mr. Brightside." Chapter title is
     from Halsey's "Drive."
     As for Veela canon mythology, there wasn't much there. I had room to
     wiggle, so i did a whole jig.
***** Would It Really Kill You? *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Breathing heavily and with a smile on his face, Matthew Williams landed
soundlessly and dismounted his broom. The night air was biting, but he didn't
mind the cold. This was the only time of day Matthew felt comfortable enough to
indulge his love of flying, free from the risk of interacting with the school's
Quidditch teams or anyone having a joy ride of their own. Not being around
people meant that he didn't have to face the knowledge that they didn't see
him. While he could never fly for long or often, it was enough to get him
through his days studying for O.W.L.s and the stress that was navigating the
school being all but invisible to his classmates and most of his professors.
The ghosts were friendly and even Peeves seemed to have a soft spot for him,
but conversing with the dead lost its novelty when people would go out of their
way to avoid them and run right into him. The house-elves were great, too, but
it didn't change the fact that the humans he interacted with ignored his
existence. Being hurt by it would have taken all of his energy, so he just
avoided people as much as possible, his roommate and best (only) friend
excluded. Lovino Vargas was probably the most off-putting person he knew that
also had a heart of gold. He covered for him on nights like these, in case
anyone asked where he was. No one ever did.
But that was fine because it meant Matthew got away with this forbidden treat,
got to just fly without being wary of anyone else. Would he have liked to play
for his team? Of course. But he was too shy to go to try-outs, knowing that the
team captain would likely overlook him because that's what happened to Matthew.
People saw him, acknowledged him if he was lucky, then forgot about him in an
instant. Matthew knew it wasn't their fault; he was just utterly unremarkable.
It was probably best he wasn't on the team anyway since he would likely be
forgotten mid-game and be flown directly into by an unsuspecting player.
Matthew laughed at the thought bitterly to himself as he put the broom away.
No, it was safer for all involved if Matthew just watched the games from the
stands.
Matthew was satisfied with these few, precious nights and was grateful to have
them. His natural invisibility worked wonders when sneaking away and he was a
master of silencing charms. If he wanted, he could have gotten away with a lot,
but he never bothered. This was all he needed and as long as he wasn't caught—
"That was some awesome flying you did out there."
Matthew made a mortifyingly high cry of surprise as he turned to the low voice
that had cut through the dark. Even with only a half moon and the dim glow of
lanterns closer to the castle to aid his night vision, Matthew could tell by
the way shadows fell across the intruder's sharp features and the way his heart
started beating faster that his night had been interrupted by none other than
Gilbert Beilschmidt. As in the Gilbert Beilschmidt that was his is advanced
charms class. As in the Gilbert Beilschmidt that was part of a notorious clique
of Slytherins that were said to run all the major smuggling operations at the
school but had never been caught. As in the Gilbert Beilschmidt that Matthew
had had a crush on for nearly two years and had become a frequent guest in his
more risqué dreams.
As in the Gilbert Beilschmidt who had addressed him first with a compliment and
was waiting on a response.
Matthew cleared his throat and tried desperately to make sure his internal
freak-out remained his little secret. "Thank you."
Gilbert smirked at him and Matthew died a little inside. "You're cute. What's
someone like you doing out here at this hour?"
A cold sweat broke out along his spine as him mind recalled his words from two
years before. Someone had knocked his books out of his hands when running past
and Gilbert had been passing by. He had stopped to help him and it was the
first time anyone other than Lovino had done so. When he handed the books to
him, Matthew saw the most unusually handsome boy he had ever seen smirk at him.
With a more pronounced German accent than the one he spoke with now, Gilbert
had said, "Watch out, cutie. Wouldn't want someone like you to get hurt." Then
he had winked and been on his way, not realizing what he had done by being the
first person to call Matthew attractive that wasn't his parents. He never had a
chance.
Matthew licked his lips, trying to quiet his mental screaming so he could
think. "Thanks again. I like flying and this is my favorite time to do so. Why
are you out here? I've never run into anyone before."
Gilbert shrugged and walked towards him, dressed in casual clothes with his
winter cloak around him. When Matthew said casual, he meant black leather
boots, so worn in that they only made softest of sounds as he moved, black
jeans washed so many times they had become a dark grey, and a black turtleneck
that did nothing to hide his slim but muscled figure. Gilbert cocked an eyebrow
at him, his silver hair catching what little moonlight there was and…and
Matthew realized that Gilbert had caught him staring. He blushed, but fought
the urge to look away because Gilbert was staring back.
Oh, shit. What the hell do I do!? I have no protocol for this!
After a long moment, Gilbert smiled at him, actually smiled, and gestured over
towards the castle. "Shall we?"
"Sure." They started walking back to the warmth of the castle, Matthew quietly
guiding Gilbert on the safest path he knew to get in and out unseen. He
followed easily, like he knew the way already but was happy to let Matthew lead
him. Matthew tried to think of what to say or if he should say anything as they
continued. He wanted to know why Gilbert didn't answer his question, but it
felt rude to ask more than once. Still…"So, why are you here?" Matthew winced
at how abrupt that sounded.
Gilbert just cackled that strange laugh that was uniquely his, like he was
trying to hold back his mirth but was failing badly. "Kesesese, I wanted some
air and decided to take a stroll. I had been walking for about thirty minutes
when I heard the sound of laughter and found you. Imagine my surprise, hearing
a laugh in the dark like that."
Matthew winced again and looked down, picking up his pace a little. "Sorry
about that. I didn't mean to scare anyone."
"Hey," Gilbert intentionally knocked against Matthew's side lightly, causing
him to look up. Gilbert was frowning at him, but not unkindly. "Don't sweat it.
You said yourself that you had never run into anyone else, so why should you
have been concerned? Besides, once I found out it was you, I was happy for it.
I don't think I've ever heard you laugh before."
Matthew stopped moving abruptly, both of them just barely hidden from anyone
who might be watching from the castle. "What? You've heard me before? You've
seenme before?"
Gilbert turned around, too, and looked at him like he was the one who had just
said something very strange, not the other way around. "Yeah, I've seen you. We
dogo to the same school."
"Oh, you probably mean my brother. We look a lot alike." It wasn't like anyone
took the time to really see that, but that was neither here nor there. Alfred
had always drawn people's attention, whether they liked it or not, though it
had taken Matthew years to figure out that he was doing it on purpose. Being
his twin made Matthew highly acclimated to being invisible to anyone but Alfred
and their parents. He could be mistaken for Alfred, but that had stopped
happening when they came to Hogwarts. Wearing their house colors meant that a
quick glance at the neck would confirm that he was not the rowdy Gryffindor
that was his brother. He was a Hufflepuff and proud and damn happy he wasn't
attracting Alfred's enemies anymore. Primary school had been a minefield of
Alfred's mistakes.
"Er, no. You're in my advanced charms class, right? And I see you in the
library sometimes."
What the fuck?"Oh! I, um, well, sorry. I'm used to being mistaken for him."
"No need to apologize. Come on, let's get out of the cold."
Matthew nodded and they continued on, the silence strangely comfortable. He
liked this, just being with another person. He loved Lovino, really he did, but
it was a little draining to be around him. He could only sit still after eating
a large amount of food and tended to avoid silences unless something was
bothering him. But Gilbert didn't say anything, though that could have been
because they were actually in the castle now, walking very carefully until
Gilbert pulled him to a stop in front of a large tapestry. His unusual but
arresting crimson eyes regarded him carefully for a moment before he spoke.
"There's a short cut to the Slytherin common room through here. I trust you
have a way back?"
Matthew grinned at him and dared to roll his eyes, "No, Gilbert, I habitually
sneak out by way of the front door. I'll be fine."
Gilbert smiled back at him. "I wondered if you knew my name. Good night, then."
Gilbert moved towards the edge of the tapestry and Matthew turned to find his
own way. "Oh, and Matthew?"
Matthew inhaled sharply. No one knew his name but the professors (sometimes),
Lovino, and Alfred. Everyone forgot it as soon as they were told. But Gilbert
knew. He turned back to him with wide surprised eyes and found Gilbert smirking
at him. "Yes?"
"There's no on in this castle that looks like you. I could never mistake you
for someone else."
Matthew stared at him with parted lips for a second, shocked to his core.
Suddenly nervous, he licked his lips and said, "Good night, Gilbert."
Matthew turned and fled, not staying to see what was behind the tapestry. His
heartrate didn't slow as he raced through the castle unseen and unheard by
anyone but Peeves who quietly teased him for his persistent flush before flying
off to harass a couple of fourth years making out further down the hall. Their
shrieks of fright brought a Ravenclaw prefect running to them, clearing
Matthew's way to sneak behind a large statue of a centaur to the hidden passage
way to the kitchens.
He made it back to the dormitory with little fuss but was very distracted. The
minute he entered the very cozy (and empty) common room of the Hufflepuff
Basement, Matthew let himself freak out in safety, pacing restlessly.
Gilbert knows my name, knows who I am. What? How? When did he start…why did he
never say anything before? Would he say anything about me sneaking out?
Probably not since he was out, too. And he was just taking a stroll? When the
Slytherin Dungeon is basically on the other side of the grounds from the pitch?
Does he do that a lot? Does he have trouble sleeping? We have charms tomorrow.
Will he say anything? ShouldIsay anything?
Matthew groaned out loud and flopped onto one of the overstuffed couches,
staring blearily at the lightly glowing embers of the badly banked fire,
glasses askew. Does this change anything?
After lying there for some minutes, Matthew sighed and pushed himself up to get
ready for bed. Personal crisis or not, he still had transfiguration in the
morning. Besides, it wasn't like fretting about it would give him any answers.
He just had to wait and see.
===============================================================================
Charms had always been Matthew's best subject and was the one class he wasn't
worried about passing his O.W.L. in. He might have been one of the few people
in the class who could say that if the looks of sheer panic at the thought of
having to perform any previously taught charm on command for the next week
meant what he thought. Professor Flitwick, an exceedingly kind man of short
stature with greying hair and the ability to remember who Matthew was, seemed
to recognize this as he called the class' attention back to him.
"Now, everyone, please don't be alarmed! This is a graded exercise, but
studying for this will be some of your best preparation for the O.W.L.s you'll
all be taking in just a few months. We will have this sort of exam once a month
until June. Hopefully by then, you'll all not have those looks of distress on
your faces. You'll have the rest of class to practice with partners and to ask
me questions about specific charms. You aren't first-years, so I expect you to
pick your own partners responsibly and actually work without me looking over
your shoulders." He chuckled to himself at his own joke; he was by far the
shortest person in the room. "Go on."
Matthew settled in to study his textbook and notes alone, knowing full well
that he was likely not to be approached. He highly doubted Flitwick would say
anything as he was meeting with Matthew once a month to provide him with
supplementary materials to study for fun. Charms was the one thing he had a
talent for (well, besides being generally unnoticeable); he figured he might as
well excel at it. He was just glancing at the theory behind patronus
communications when he was addressed.
"You're just full of unexpected rebellion this week, aren't you?"
Matthew looked up to see Gilbert smirking at him. He was standing directly in
front of him on the next lowest tier of the class room. Sounding more confused
than he probably should have been, he said, "Gilbert?"
"That's the awesome me. So, what's next?" He leaned closer and lowered his
voice. "First there's sneaking out for a midnight joyride and now there's
blatantly ignoring a professor's instructions. What's next, Matthew? Going to
the restricted section of the library without a note? I didn't expect such an
attitude from one of your house."
If there was one thing that could make Matthew forget his nervousness, it was
someone insinuating that he had been sorted into an inferior house. "And from
one of yours, I would be expecting you to think bigger. You're supposed to be
cunning, right?"
Instead of being offended, Gilbert gave a surprised bark of laughter, drawing
the attention of several people, including Flitwick. "I said working,
Beilschmidt. Either start practicing with Williams or stop distracting him."
"Sure thing, Professor." Gilbert called back, eyes never leaving Matthew. "So
how about it, Williams? Although…" Gilbert read is notebook upside down and
frowned. "…I know for sure we weren't taught these in class. You might be too
smart to work with a repeat student like me."
"No, not at all! I would love to practice with you. I just, well, I really like
charms, so I study a little more than necessary. And repeating a class to
retake an O.W.L. doesn't make you stupid. If anything, it shows how determined
and hardworking you are, to want to get it right." Gilbert stared at him for a
long moment, like he had done something surprising. "What?"
Gilbert cleared his throat and looked away from him. "Nothing. Thanks, I guess.
Should we start?"
Matthew blinked at him, confused about his shift in mood, but smiled at him
anyway. He seemed uncomfortable, so Matthew tried to get him back on more
familiar territory. "You're welcome, I guess. Sure. Which one first?"
Gilbert looked at him and smiled a little. "Incendio?"
Why am I not surprised? "Okay. Let's see if you can make something other—nope,
you know what, forget what I just said. I'll just, um, light that torch on
fire? Great." Matthew stood and turned around quickly, sure his face was red.
He needed a better filter if they were going to keep talking.
He took out his wand and ignored the obvious smirk on Gilbert's face as he came
around the desk to stand beside him. "If I can make something other than
whatburn?" His voice was low and damn near a purr.
Matthew just barely stopped himself from shivering and locked his gaze on the
torch in question. "Incendio." A jet of red light shot out from the tip of his
wand and the torch in question roared to life, the fire a bit more intense than
necessary. Something other than my blood. "That torch, of course."
Gilbert raised his eyebrows at him then focused on another unlit torch. Matthew
sighed. This was going to be a long class.
===============================================================================
"You've got to be kidding me." Gilbert stared at Matthew like the boy was
crazy, which was a distinct possibility at this point.
"I'm really not." Matthew was smiling wryly at him and Gilbert was once again
struck by how beautiful he was. He had noticed him the first day of their
shared class back in September and was reminded of it again as his pink bow
mouth quirked at him and his so-blue-they're-almost-purple eyes at him sparkled
with amusement. His hair was a light gold that shone as it fell in barely-there
waves to his shoulders and he had a fair completion of someone who didn't tan
well. Matthew had a delicate, quiet beauty that was just beginning to harden as
puberty settled into him. In just the few months that Gilbert had known him,
Matthew had grown perhaps seven centimeters, though he had never acted like the
shift in height bothered him. His voice was soft with a hidden core of steel
that continued to draw Gilbert in the more he spoke. Even if what he was saying
was completely insane. "You get to practice your stunning spells, I get to
practice my defense techniques. If you stun me, Professor Flitwick will revive
me and we'll be done for the day. If not, we both get a good exercise. Sounds
like a win-win for me."
Gilbert knew that Matthew was skilled with charms but asking him to try and
deliberately stun him seemed like a bit much. Still, he couldn't fault the
logic and nodded. "Alright. Ready?"
Matthew rolled his eyes at him but smiled at him like Gilbert was the best
thing in the world. Fuck. "Yes, Gilbert. I'm ready." His wand was in his hand,
pointed towards the ground and relaxed.
"Call me Gil."
That made him tense. "What?"
"Stupify."
Matthew arm made a wide sweeping motion and brought his wand down along the
center of his body, eyes wide and mouth parted soundlessly. The red spell from
Gilbert's wand hit an invisible barrier and bounced back towards him. Gilbert
moved out of the way in time for the spell to harmlessly hit the wall behind
him. The reflexive adrenaline that flooded his system had him breathing heavily
and grinning sharply at Matthew who was doing the same. Oh, this was going to
be—
"Williams! Beilschmidt! There are too many people in here to be bouncing
stunning charms all over the place. Flirt on your own time and tone it down!" A
smattering of giggles and chuckles filled the room as the pair suddenly had the
attention of the entire class.
Matthew blinked and turned red, looking away from Gilbert quickly to stare at
the ground. Gilbert watched with great interest as his bit his lip and said,
"Apologies, professor. We weren't—"
"Sorry, professor. It won't happen again." Gilbert interrupted, not wanting
Matthew to say that they weren't flirting. As before, he kept his eyes on
Matthew as he addressed their teacher and watched his eyes flash up to him in
surprise before quickly looking away again. The blush was renewed and Gilbert
tilted his head to the side as he realized something he would have thought
impossible before now.
Matthew, the rare, interesting, smart, and kind beauty that he was, liked him
back. Gilbert didn't know how no one had claimed Matthew before now, had dated
him and taken his interest before Gilbert arrived on the scene, but he wasn't
going to hesitate any longer in pursuing him. Gilbert felt his expression
become predatory and Matthew glanced back over to him. Gilbert watched as his
eyes widened and he visibly fought the urge to take a step back. Matthew stood
his ground and Gilbert's smile widened.
"Oh, for heaven's sake! This is worse than herding cats! Class dismissed."
Flitwick shouted before mumbling to himself something about bloody teenagers
and their hormones.
Gilbert looked around and saw more than one person look away from him quickly
to gather their things. They had had an audience. He looked back over to
Matthew and saw him hastily packing away his things. Not wanting to push him
since he already seemed a little skittish, Gilbert approached him slowly from
the side and said, "That was impressive." Matthew looked up at him and Gilbert
tried to smile as disarmingly as possible. "Thanks for practicing with me
today, Matthew. See you around."
Gilbert turned to leave when he felt a soft touch on his arm. He looked back
and saw that Matthew was looking at him quizzically. "Thank you, Gil. Anytime
you want to practice, send me an owl or something."
Gilbert was doing a very uncool, happy jig in his head but smoothly said, "Will
do."
Matthew nodded and started to leave before pausing to say, "Call me Mattie." He
then left the room so fast you would have thought it was on fire.
Gilbert gathered his things and left quickly, feeling Flitwick's glare the
entire time. It wasn't his fault the class couldn't concentrate. His mind was
busy thinking of how he was going to get Matthew to stay around him long enough
to hold an actual conversation.
Gilbert also knew what probably everyone else in that room had figured out: he
had started a hunt and Matthew was his prey. It wasn't the first time Gilbert
had hunted someone, but it could be the last. This time, he wasn't playing
catch and release. No, if Matthew was even half as interesting as their
interactions within the past twenty-four hours promised, then Gilbert was
playing for keeps.
Matthew wouldn't even know what hit him.
===============================================================================
"Something you want to tell me, maple bastard?"
Matthew looked up from where he was working on his transfiguration essay in the
Great Hall to see Lovino staring at his with his arms crossed from the other
side of the table. The brunet's hair was in its usual lightly tousled state and
his hazel eyes were teasingly accusatory. Matthew didn't take offense to the
curse; a specified "bastard" moniker was how Lovino greeted people that he
liked. Matthew had been one of the first to figure that out and that was the
one curse Lovino had broken the professors of trying to stop him over.
Otherwise, he had to watch his language in public, a fact that he hated.
Matthew had just finished a full day of classes and desperately wanted a nap,
but had to finish this assignment first. "Um, not that I can think of. I'm just
doing my work."
"That's interesting." Lovino sat down across from him and said, "I've been
hearing the most intriguing rumors about a certain potato bastard who declared
open season on someone in his charms class, though no one seems to know the
kid's name. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you?"
Fuck, the rumor mill in the school needs to calm down. "You shouldn't listen to
everything you hear, Lovi. You know how stories grow in the telling of them. We
were just partners in class today and accidentally drew the class' attention
when we started practicing more dangerous stuff. That's all." That wasn't all,
but damn if he was going to talk about it in the Great Hall. Ears were all over
the place, extendable and otherwise. He glanced around before leveling a
meaningful stare at his friend. "I'm happy we had good weather last night. I
thought we were going to catch some rain, though. That would have been nice." I
went out last night and got caught, but it was okay.
Lovino straightened in surprise and stared at him for a second. Then he said,
"It's probably too cold outside to rain. You meant snow, right?" You were
caught by that albino bastard?
"You're right."
Lovino made a clear what the fuck gesture before standing. "Come on, bastard.
You look like you're going to fall over if you don't sleep soon." We need to
talk now and you also need to get some fucking sleep. What the hell is wrong
with you, not sleeping and shit? We've had this talk, Mattie.
Matthew laughed lightly but gathered his things. "I sleep enough."
"No, you don't. Don't even try to fucking lie to me about—"
"Language, Mr. Vargas!" Professor Longbottom called out from halfway across the
room. The herbology professor wasn't one to dock house points for Lovino's bad
mouth, but he did call him out on it.
"Sorry, professor." Matthew was laughing silently to himself at his friend's
sour expression before standing.
"They wouldn't hear you if you lowered your voice."
Lovino glared at him but didn't say anything as they left the Great Hall. Once
they were passed the doors and headed down the stairs, he said lowly, "Start
talking, because for rumors like the one I heard to spread that fast through
the school, something had to have caused it and I'm not buying the whole 'we
were just partners' thing. I've heard more about that fifth year charms class
today than I have for the entire year."
Matthew sighed, wishing not for the first time that Lovino wasn't a year older
than him so he would have seen what happened and could help him interpret it
because Matthew honestly didn't know whatto think. "We really were just
practicing."
In his regular voice, he said, "Uh uh, nope, I don't believe this. For two
years, I've had to watch you fawn over that Slytherin—"
A group of Slytherin students rounded the corner further and Lovino abruptly
cut himself off, turning red as Matthew glared at him. Once the two groups had
passed each other with only minimal interested looks from the other house,
Matthew hissed, "Speak a little louder, Lovi. I don't think they heard you in
the Astronomy Tower."
"Sorry, dammit. But all your silent pining for two years and then the day he
works with you for at least an hour, you fucking say, 'we were just partners?'
Eeent, wrong, try again."
"He recognized me, Lovi. He even knew my name last night."
It only took Matthew a second to realize that he was traveling sans Italian. He
turned around to see Lovino staring at him in shock. Matthew would have been
offended if he had not had the exact same reaction. All at once, Lovino became
a flurry of movement as he started rushing Matthew to the basement. "Holy shit,
now I haveto know. You're going to tell me everything!"
This was going to take a while. So much for that nap.
===============================================================================
"Something you want to tell us, Gil?"
Gilbert looked up from where he was lounging on his bed, reading a textbook to
see Francis and Antonio walk in. He was half surprised that Alistair wasn't
with them, but he always liked to approach things differently. He looked
between them, sensing they had something in mind, but not bothering to think on
it too hard. They would let him know in a minute. "No."
Antonio raised his eyebrows at him as kept moving over to his bed on the other
side of the room. He green eyes clearly betrayed his disbelief. "Are you sure
about that?"
Gilbert looked at him with an openly confused and increasingly annoyed
expression. "Yeah. What, is something wrong?"
Francis sat on his trunk, opposite of Antonio. He gave a characteristically
Gallic shrug and said, "We've never not been told when you started hunting
someone, yet the school is abuzz with the happy news."
"Shit, already? People need to get fucking lives." Gilbert shook his head and
looked back at his textbook, his mind a mile away. Fucking hell, he really
didn't want Matthew to be scared away because of the rumors. Gilbert had earned
a reputation, but that wasn't all there was to him. He didn't know much about
actual romantic commitment, but he knew that if he really wanted to try and
date him (which he did), then Gilbert needed to be as honest as possible with
him. He wanted Matthew to get to know him, without the information being
filtered through any busybodies, including his friends. If things started off
well, then he would thinkabout introducing them. If you weren't used to them,
Antonio, Francis, and (especially) Alistair could be a little…intimidating.
Meanwhile, Francis and Antonio looked between each other and Gilbert in shock.
Francis tried again. "The strange thing is that no one knows who you're after,
even the people that saw you declare 'open season' as they call it."
Gilbert sat up and raised his eyebrows at him. "I never said anything, we just
looked at each other and people made assumptions."
Antonio said, "So you're not pursuing someone?"
Gilbert ignored the question. "You said that no one knows who he is?" That was
weird. It was a class full of fifth years, people that had been in classes with
him for years, and no one knew Matthew's name?
Maybe he had to rethink Matthew's surprise when Gilbert recognized him last
night.
"You arehunting someone, then?" Francis asked impatiently.
"A fifth-year boy?" Antonio continued.
"Why does no one know who he is?" Gilbert wondered aloud.
"Gilbert!" They both shouted at him.
Gilbert just rolled his eyes. "Yes. Are you happy?"
His friends looked at him like he had lost his mind. "That's all we're getting?
'Yes?' We've never had to play twenty questions with you." Francis said,
incredulous.
He had to give them some kind of explanation so they would back off. "Guys,
nothing against you, but I really like this guy and I don't want him to be
scared off. I'll tell you more if things pan out, but I don't want to jinx it,
alright?"
They looked at him like he had said that he had announced his decision to
become a recluse in the Carpathian Mountains. Antonio shook his head and walked
over to him, planting his hand on his forehead.
"Dude, what the hell?" Gilbert said as he batted him away.
"He doesn't have a fever. We should still take him to Madam—"
Gilbert cut him off with a pillow to the face. Antonio started laughing and
tackled Gilbert in retaliation. While he was fighting him off with more pillow
attacks, he said, "I'm not sick, you assholes!"
"It was reasonable to check, mon ami. You and commitment?" Francis scoffed as
he came to stand beside where the two were wrestling until Gilbert tossed
Antonio to the floor. "Aw, and just as I was about to ask to join."
Gilbert just shook his head at his friend, unsurprised. Antonio sat up from his
position of the floor and said, "You know I'm with Lovi, Francis!"
Gilbert laughed a little. Antonio had been trying to get Lovino Vargas, a
Hufflepuff in their year, to date him since day one. The funny thing was, he
seemed to be close to succeeding and everyone knew Lovino had a thing for him,
all shouted obscenities to the contrary. "No, you're not."
Antonio smirked at him. "Not yet. Oh, wait! Lovi knows all the gossip in the
school. He probably knows who your prey is!"
Gilbert would certainly hope so, considering they were in the same house,
though Antonio did have a point. If he and his friends were known to be the
smugglers of the school, Lovino was like the boss of gossip. He knew everything
about everyone and used that information to his advantage. Honestly, Gilbert
was surprised he wore yellow and black rather than his own green and silver,
but who understood the sorting hat anyway?
Gilbert still rolled his eyes, not wanting to give anything away. "Just drop
it, will you?"
He knew they wouldn't. Finding privacy to talk to Matthew was going to be
difficult.
===============================================================================
It was during Matthew's free period on that Friday that he saw Gilbert next. It
was a cold February afternoon, so the Clock Tower Courtyard was free of other
students. Matthew didn't feel the cold like most, so he was lounging on the
edge of the old fountain, head resting against a stone eagle as he worked his
way through a book he was reading for a research paper. He was still in his
winter cloak and gloves, but that was more for appearances. He wasn't expecting
any company other than the crows around him, so he jumped when he was
addressed.
"Hey, Mattie." Gilbert smiled at the sound of Matthew's high cry of distress.
"We've got to stop meeting like this."
"You need to start wearing a bell," Matthew said as he calmed. He took in
Gilbert's heavily bundled up appearance and frowned. "Hi, Gil. What are you
doing here?"
Gilbert approached him from the courtyard entrance with a shrug. "I like taking
walks. It give me time to clear my head and I use them as study breaks, so I
usually go for a long one once a day. What are you doing out here? Wait, are
you reading? I didn't mean to—"
"No, no, it's okay. I could use a break." Matthew smiled at him, trying his
best not to start freaking out again. Gilbert was one of the few people who
seemed like they could remember him and actually wanted to talk. Homework or
no, Matthew was notgoing to let the opportunity to get to know the boy he's
liked from afar for the longest a bit more slip away. If he was lucky, they
could even become friends.
Despite what everyone was saying about what happened between them (and Matthew
for the first time was getting great amusement in no one figuring out his
identity), he seriously doubted that Gilbert was "hunting" him. He had heard
all the gossip about Gilbert's romantic reputation, how he "hunted" people to
hook up with then left them after a short time. While Matthew would easily
place himself in the "willing prey" category, he just couldn't see anyone (let
alone Gilbert) wanting him like that. Professor Flitwick had jumped to the
wrong conclusion on Tuesday and anything Matthew (or Lovino) read into that one
particular moment was just projected wishful thinking. Besides, while Matthew
saw the benefits of casual dating, he mostly thought the whole thing was too
much effort to maintain unless you were serious about the relationship. He had
too many other things to do and no one ever looked at him twice, anyway.
Gilbert smiled again, trademark smirk nowhere to be seen and he settled on the
opposite end of Matthew's perch after wincing at the coolness of the stone.
"You really sat still on this stone, reading? How are you not frozen solid by
now?"
It was Matthew's turn to shrug and he gave Gilbert the same explanation he gave
Lovino when he had asked a few years prior. "The cold doesn't bother me much. I
rather like it, actually. But I can't standhot weather, so there's a tradeoff.
Maybe I'm just thick-blooded or something." Yeah, or something.
"So that's why you were flying the other night in basically just your uniform
and a light cloak?"
Shit. He had forgotten about his (lack of) attire, but he was more surprised
Gilbert had noticed. "Yeah, pretty much. I didn't really think before I went
out that night. I just felt the need to get out of the basement, you know?"
"Yeah, I get that. Being by the lake is awesome, but it can get kind of
claustrophobic. And, er, I don't think I said it before, but you were flying
really well."
Matthew felt himself blush but raised his eyebrows at him anyway. "Thank you.
That's high praise from a Slytherin beater." Gilbert wasn't just popular for
his looks and arrogant charm; he and his friend, Alistair, were two of the most
notorious Quidditch players at Hogwarts. Both beaters moved together in well-
choreographed synchronization, but were known to get creative in ways that
always had their opponents on edge. Their combined strategy and aim was
extremely effective and damn near lethal, but had also earned them an air of
danger that had many students lining up to be their companions, if only for the
evening. Or, at least, that's what Matthew had gathered from the chatter of the
people around him who didn't realize he was there.
It was Gilbert's turn to blush, though he may have just been red from the cold.
Maybe they should start moving. Staying still was fine for Matthew, but Gilbert
might need to keep walking. "It's true, though. I'm surprised you're not on the
Hufflepuff team, to be perfectly honest."
Matthew stood. "I, um, never tried out. Hey, do you want to take a walk with
me? The chill's starting to set into even my bones."
Gilbert stood quickly enough that Matthew knew he had made the right call. He
put his book in his bag and they started walking. "Why not? You seemed to love
it up there and I could have sworn I saw you move in a few patterns used in
games."
Matthew stared at him so long in shock that he almost fell when his foot
slipped on an ice patch. Gilbert steadied him with hands on his arms and
Matthew reflexively reached for his shoulders. Once he was stable, he sighed
and looked up to see Gilbert watching him from less than a foot away. His heart
gave a painful and worrying thud when Gilbert said, "Watch you step, Mattie.
Don't want you to get hurt."
Oh, fuck. Gilbert stiffened and frowned briefly, letting Matthew go. Matthew
hastened to release him and cleared his throat. "Thanks, Gilbert. You alright?"
"Yeah. I just a weird feeling of déjà vu." Gilbert shook his head and gestured
for them to start walking again. "So, why didn't you try out?"
"I didn't think I would be a good fit for the team. How long were you watching
me fly?"
Gilbert winced and briefly covered his mouth with the green and grey scarf.
"Only five minutes or so before you landed. I realize that I look a little
suspicious, running into you twice in one week, but I honestly surprised to
find you every time."
Matthew laughed slightly. "Relax, Gil. I didn't think you were following me or
anything. I had just wondered. Why did you stay so long?"
"At first, I was curious about who would dare fly in the Quidditch pitch at
night. Once I figured it was you, I thought I would say hello. I knew you were
in my class, but realized I knew nothing about you. Figured that if you sneak
out just to fly, you probably were worth taking the time to actually talk to
you. And I, well…"
Matthew watched as Gilbert unmistakably blushed, the splash of color
contrasting prettily with his eyes and skin color. "What is it?"
"I've been wanting to talk to you for a while now, but I didn't really know how
to start a casual conversation with you."
Whoa, what?Matthew was once again utterly flabbergasted and really wanted to
ask why, but Gilbert was clearly embarrassed. He didn't want to make him more
uncomfortable, so he intentionally knocked his shoulder against Gilbert's arm
and said, "A simple hi, would have worked, Gil. I would have appreciated it."
"Oh." An uncomfortable silence fell between them, Matthew unsure if he should
confess his own anxieties of speaking to Gilbert without revealing too much.
Gilbert, thankfully, saved him from overthinking, at least for the moment.
"Mattie?"
"Yes?"
"Hi."
Feeling like his heart was in his eyes, Matthew beamed at him for a moment,
marveling at the sheepish expression on his face. "Hi."
Their silences weren't uncomfortable after that.
===============================================================================
Matthew was too shy to say hi to Gilbert in the hallways when he was with his
friends, but the next time they were able to speak more than a few seconds in
passing, he was the one to approach the older boy. Gilbert had been glaring
down at the parchment before him like it had offered personal offence. He had
been seated in one of the less popular study areas throughout the castle and
Matthew was surprised to find him otherwise alone. Then again, it was lunch
time.
"Hey, Gil," Matthew greeted quietly, as to not startle him. Gilbert looked up,
still glaring, though his expression quickly changed to one of happy surprise.
"Hey, Mattie."
"How are you doing?"
"Fine, just…frustrated. You?"
"I'm okay. What are you working on?"
Gilbert's shoulders slumped and he once again glared at the nearly blank page.
"Promise not to laugh?"
"Of course. Why would I?"
"Charms. I just don't get it."
Matthew frowned. "Gil, you did wonderfully on the test this week."
"Yeah but this is the charms essay that's due next week. I have no clue what to
write because I've always struggled with the theoryof it. I don't really have
time to be stalled. Between my homework for the N.E.W.T. classes and practice
in," Gilbert glanced at his watch, "forty minutes, I really just need to figure
it out."
Matthew frowned. "The essay? Which particular theory is giving you trouble?"
"The inherent difference in the summoning and banishing charms and how to apply
that same principle to other types of spells to produce effective counters. I
know you probably know, but I really want to understandit already. I've looked
at the material multiple times, but it just isn't sticking. I don't get how I
can remember so many potion recipes and defense spells, but not fucking
charms."
Gilbert was cute when he was frustrated. "Have you eaten lunch yet?"
Gilbert looked at him like he didn't understand his thought process. "Er, no."
"Why don't you go eat so you don't pass out on your broom? We can meet sometime
this weekend and I can help you through it."
"Mattie, I can't just take your time like that. You have O.W.L.s to study for
and—"
"And I'm offering. If it would make you feel better, you could help me with my
defense against the dark arts homework. That class is killing me this term."
Gilbert looked like he was considering for a moment before nodding. "Deal. How
about Sunday morning, after breakfast in the Great Hall? I have a game tomorrow
and will basically be useless after."
The location made Matthew pause, but only for a moment before smiling. Gilbert
could not have picked a more public place to meet with him, though most people
slept through breakfast on Saturday and Sunday. "Sure, that's fine. Now go grab
something fast to eat."
Gilbert chuckled lightly to himself as he gathered his things. "Really living
up to your house today, Mattie, badgering me to go eat and all." Gilbert cut
his eyes to him and Matthew groaned at the pun.
"Oh, my God. That is the worst." Still, he smiled at it only to have Gilbert
grin back at him.
"No it wasn't. You know you loved it. No need to be ashamed."
"Does the school know what a dork you are? Cause pulling puns and being
adorable would kill your bad boy image." Matthew blushed instantly at his
words, but Gilbert frowned as he started walking towards the door. Matthew
followed, not wanting to leave in the middle of a conversation but feeling
awkward.
"Adorable. Mattie, that word describes teddy bears and puppies, not people who
regularly direct bludgers at unsuspecting flyers with the intention to harm."
"Nope. You're adorable and a dork. Adorkable. Accept it. No need to be
ashamed." Gilbert turned an interesting shade of red and looked like his world
had been turned upside down. Matthew took pity on him and nudged him a little
with his arm. "Hey, I'm teasing. I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. That
wasn't my intention." He hadn't been intending on ever commenting on Gilbert's
appearance. Matthew could explain that he didn't justthink Gilbert was cute,
but he highly doubted him confessing to him just how far from innocent his
thoughts were of him would help anything.
Gilbert cleared his throat and didn't look over to him. "No, it's not that. I
guess I'm happy you feel comfortable enough around me to say things like that,
however inaccurate." Gilbert glanced over at him tentatively, an adjective
Matthew would have never used to describe him a week ago.
Matthew smiled reassuringly and said carefully, "Let's agree to disagree. And
of course I feel comfortable with you. You think I go around harassing people
to eat who aren't my friends?"
They were close enough to the Great Hall now that Matthew could hear the quiet
roar of its occupants.
"I'm honored, then. Do you want to have lunch with me?"
Matthew frowned at him. "Do you have time for that right now?"
Gilbert looked at his watch and paled. "Shit, no. I've gotta run, but I'll see
you Sunday?"
"Yeah, see you then and good luck at your game." Gilbert turned away before
hesitating a moment.
"Thanks. Are you going to the game tomorrow?"
Matthew went to all the games for specific reasons: Alfred was a Gryffindor
beater, he was a Hufflepuff and couldn't notattend those games, and he always
went to Slytherin games (for reasons, okay?). Lovino hadn't been joking when he
mentioned Matthew's silent pining. But he wasn't going to explain all that,
especially the last. "Yes. Why?"
"Just wondered. See ya!" He hurried into the Great Hall and Matthew turned to
go study like he had originally planned.
It was only a few minutes later that he stopped abruptly in the hallway,
causing someone to run into him from behind. He absently apologized and kept
moving, but the thought didn't leave him.
Did he just ask me out? And did I just say no?!
No, no way. In context, he was just asking if Matthew could keep him company
while he ate. The fact that he was even considering the possibility was a
little crazy. They were friends now, right? Gilbert blushed when he called him
adorable, but who wouldn't? Sure, they were meeting on Sunday, but that was
because Gilbert needed his help. And yes, he asked if Matthew was going to the
game tomorrow, his game.But it was a reasonable question after Matthew wished
him luck, right?
Oh, hell. Who was he kidding? Maybe there were something to those rumors after
all.
===============================================================================
"Hey, Scottie, can I talk to you for a second?"
Alistair looked at him quizzically. Gilbert winced and realized that he
probably never asked his friend if he could speak to him before. Gilbert looked
around and saw there was no one else in the changing room, so he could probably
do this here.
"Wha' is it, Gilly?"
"We really need to win tomorrow. You're my partner, so I wanted to know if you
would help me be a little more vicious than usual."
Alistair still looked confused. He tilted his head to the side a little, his
intense green eyes narrowed. "We're playin' Gryffindor. We always up tha ante a
little with 'em."
That was certainly true. Old stereotypes about the Slytherin house had
solidified in the years since the Battle of Hogwarts and Gryffindor was the
only house that openly displayed its prejudice. It made the Gryffindor-
Slytherin games the most popular and the most brutal. Slytherins always played
just within the rules and the anger Gryffindors couldn't help giving into made
them more violent in return.
"I wanted to take it up a notch. Still legal, but utterly merciless. You know
we can do it."
"Aye, I know tha'. But why?"
"…There may be someone I want to impress."
Alistair hesitated in pulling on his boots for a second before seeming to shake
it off. He groaned and ran a hand through his dark red hair. "Is this that
fifth-year ye've got tha school talkin' about?"
"Yeah," Gilbert said quietly, realizing that this could be a little weird for
him to ask of his best friend. They had never officially dated, but they were
each other's first everything and had casually hooked up to relieve some
tension. They had always laughed off the questions about them being together,
saying they were best friends. If Gilbert were perfectly honest with himself,
he could admit that if Alistair had even hinted that he wanted them to go out,
he wouldn't have hesitated. But he hadn't, so Gilbert never brought it up.
Alistair crossed his arms and pinned him with a focused look that was difficult
to hold, the deep color sharper than Gilbert expected. "Tell me a wee bit about
'em first."
Gilbert sighed but sat down on one of the benches anyway. "His name's Matthew.
He's a Hufflepuff in my charms class and I've been wanting to talk to him for
months now, but had been avoiding it. He's intimidatingly beautiful and usually
quiet. But when he's comfortable, he really opens up. He's incredibly kind but
can be stubborn. Mattie's also crazy good at charms; he shielded my stunning
spell silently."
Alistair was staring at him, a look that was equal parts like Gilbert had lost
his mind and something that he couldn't read. Then shook his head and said,
"Fine, but only 'cause ye've never asked before and ye sound utterly goneon
him. But, Gilly, there's one thing I don't get."
"What?"
"Why tha hell yer tryin' ta impress a Hufflepuff with violence," Alistair
joked, chuckling to himself as he stood.
"…I may not have thought this through. Okay, we'll have a littlemercy."
===============================================================================
"Oh, my God! Jones is clipped by a well-aimed bludger to the shoulder and rolls
out of the way. With him gone, Carriedo zooms past to head for the goal posts,
only to be intercepted by Oxenstierna. Like, I don't know what happened to
Beilschmidt and the hotter Kirkland, but they are not screwing around
today!...I'm told I can't say 'hotter Kirkland,' but really, we all know what's
up and they're both A. Kirkland. Oh, fine. Apologies to the red Kirkland for
saying the green Kirkland is sexier. Anyways…"
Matthew just shook his head and Feliks kept up his colorful narration of the
Quidditch match. He was a little worried for his brother, but Alfred just
looked pissed off rather than hurt. He hadn't even dropped his bat when he was
hit. But Feliks did have a point. Well, a couple of points.
Matthew agreed that Alistair was more attractive, but he would never say it,
especially in front of his brother. Then again, he was probably biased. He had
never had an interaction (however brief) with Arthur that had made his heart
pound and his body shake. Not to mention he apparently had a thing for slim,
dangerously handsome boys in Slytherin, but that was so not the issue right
now.
Gilbert and Alistair were being fucking ruthless.
Normally, they waited until the other team had possession of the quaffle or
were otherwise blocking their chasers to aim the bludgers at the players rather
than just around them to scare them off. The beaters were still doing that, but
they were making contact more often than usual. In fact, both Alistair and
Gilbert continuously moved with purpose rather than just waiting for a
strategic moment to strike. The change in tactics had even the Gryffindor
players on edge and it showed in their flying.
"N. Braginski scores! Slytherin now leads 210-160."
"Oi, maple bastard. What's up with your boyfriend?"
Matthew ceased his usual cheering and looked over at Lovino who hadn't taken
his eyes off the game. More accurately, hadn't taken his eyes off a certain
Slytherin chaser who was currently trying to intercept the quaffle. "I don't
know what you're talking about. I'm more single than you are."
Lovino huffed and glanced over at him. "I'm talking about how your potato
bastard is scaring the ever-loving shit out of everyone with his friend."
Matthew sighed before rolling his eyes and focusing back on the game, his eyes
going between his brother and Gilbert. "One, he's not anything other than my
friend. Two—"
"Yeah, the friend you've wanted to fuck since forever."
Matthew briefly glared at him. "No, I haven't. I like him for more than what he
looks like, Lovi."
"That doesn't have any effect on whether you want to fuck him or not, but
okay."
"You want me to bring up Antonio? Right. Anyway, where was I? Two,they're not
doing anything wrong. They just changed their tactics and no one knows how to
deal with it."
"Wait, are you defending him right now? Is that what's happening? Cause that's
what it fucking sounds like. And they? Are we throwing in your oh-so-secret
attraction to the scary redhead?"
Matthew blushed. "I don't know what you're talking about." Lovino made a
disbelieving sound, which Matthew ignored. "And there's nothing to defend. It's
not like they've hurt someone yet, which usually happens—"
"Wang takes a hit from a bludger aimed by Beilschmidt and oooh, that's gotta
hurt!" Feliks shouted into the amplifier. "He dropped to quaffle into Adnan's
waiting hands and is now holding his arm to his chest and is headed towards the
med-station. I don't see any blood but it takes a lot for Wang to go down and
the Gryffindors know it. They look pissed."
Fuck.
"You were saying?"
"…That usually happens this late in the game anyway."
"Un-fucking-believable. I don't know why I'm surprised. Something must have
caused this. Someone would have fucking said some shit if you two went public
but—holy shit."
Matthew looked around frantically to see if someone else was hurt that Feliks
didn't announce. When he saw nothing unusual, he said, "What is it?"
Lovino looked at him, a little horrified, and asked, "Does he know you're
here?"
"Yes, he asked me if I was attending yesterday. What does that have to do with
anything?"
"Holy. Motherfucking. Shit. He's trying to impress you."
"What? No."
"Yes, he is. But he's never done this for any of his other hunts…so, I honestly
don't know if I should congratulate you or give you my condolences because he
reallyfucking likes you."
"You're trying to convince me that he and Alistair are terrifying the
Gryffindors because he likes me? Do you realize how crazy that—"
Matthew stopped talking as time seemed to go in slow motion for a second.
Gilbert had flown lower to avoid a bludger hit towards him by Alfred to take
the other almost completely to his side from the other Gryffindor beater. He
seemed to roll with the hit and managed to stay on his broom, but that had to
have hurt like hell. He held his side for a long moment as he shook his head,
presumably at Alistair who looked livid.
"Holy sh-sugar! Beilschmidt takes a bludger to the side from a two pronged
attack by Jones and Denson. He's holding his side but seems to be still
playing, my people. Green Kirland looks like he's ready to take heads and the
rest of Slytherin wouldn't be far behind him. Like, I know I've been sayin'
those two had been taking no prisoners, but that was just fudgin' dirty.
Meanwhile, Carriedo scores with a vicious throw and Slytherin leads 250-190.
Red Kirkland's going to have to be quick with the snitch to help Gryffindor out
of the hole with the Slytherin team in this mood."
Matthew was still standing in shock with his hand over his mouth, horrified.
Lovino spoke first, "Okay, thatwas fucking uncalled for. I wish your boyfriend
and his scary friend all the luck in kicking Gryffindor's ass."
Matthew didn't respond as he watched Gilbert straighten and make a hand gesture
to Alistair. Alistair nodded and started to circle the pitch close to the
ground while Gilbert circled the opposite way above regular play. They looked
like they were waiting for something and Matthew took a minute to glare at his
brother. They were going to have a talk later.
"Bonnefoy shoots off, presumably after the snitch. Red Kirkland follows but is
going to have to be quick to catch up. Bonnefoy pulls up short and flies a
completely different direction. It looks like the snitch is going to make them
work for it like a stripper when their rent's due, folks."
Not for the first time, Matthew questioned who decided it was a good idea to
give Feliks the equivalent of a microphone.
He went back to watching Gilbert, looking to see if he looked unsteady. Then,
he stopped circling, flew to one side of the pitch and made a large gesture.
Alistair flew to one spot about on the other side of the pitch, and waited.
Matthew wasn't the only one who noted the change and Matthias Denson drew
Alfred's attention to it as well. They looked uneasy as far as Matthew could
tell, probably expecting retaliation.
Neither Francis nor Arthur had caught the snitch by the time Gilbert suddenly
started moving, Alistair carefully adjusting his position to match his by some
prepared plan. The chasers in the middle were heading towards the Gryffindor
goal posts with rapid speed and that was when Gilbert swung his bat and hit a
bludger towards Alistair.
Alfred seemed to figure out what was happening but was across the pitch and
couldn't make it over in time as Alistair, prepared the redirect the bludger,
hit it towards the Gryffindor keeper, Christian, and knocked him off his broom
just in time for Natalia to score another ten points for Slytherin.
"…Fudging heck. Did I just hallucinate that? I feel like I did. Everyone saw
Beilschmidt hit a bludger towards green Kirkland, only to have it redirected to
knock Smith, one of the steadiest Gryffindor players, off his broom, right?
Smith appears to be holding his stomach, but otherwise unharmed thanks to a
quick cushioning spell by our very own Madam Hooch. Like, I know I should
probably be outraged or something, but I'm mostly impressed. And a little hot.
Score's 270-190."
"…If he's trying to impress me, he's succeeded." Impressed was a mild way to
express what he was feeling.
"Hell, I'm impressed enough for the both of us. If that French fuck could hurry
up and catch the goddamn snitch that would be great."
Alistair and Gilbert seemed to think so, too. Gilbert started mimicking Francis
to keep away any stray bludgers as Alistair focused on distracting the other
team. "It's still anyone's game."
"But you want Slytherin to win, right? Not your brother?"
"…Yeah." He felt only a little shame at that but quickly dismissed it. Alfred
needed to be taken down a peg, anyway. Gryffindor was having problems keeping
Slytherin from scoring with their keeper missing and the gap in their scores
became wider and wider. The Slytherin team seemed to not have let go of their
anger from the stunt pulled on Gilbert and had fallen into an impressive
rhythm.
"Hey, Mattie?"
"Yeah?"
"You know there's going to be a bunch of people trying to get into your
boyfriend's pants now, right?"
Matthew gave him a tight lipped smile. "He's not my boyfriend."
"Antonio's not mine either. Doesn't mean we won't get jealous."
"…I may have a problem then. And, for the love of God, Lovi, just date him
already."
"I'll think about it and only if you just fucking admit once and for all you
want to jump Eyebrow's brother. You've only been denying it for a year or so."
"…No comment."
===============================================================================
Gilbert was hunched over a cup a coffee the following morning. He was tired and
his ribs were still bruised, but he was otherwise okay. At the moment, he was
desperately trying to wake-up enough to not be completely out of it when
breakfast ended and he met with Matthew.
"What's wrong, Gil? You look tired."
Gilbert slid his eyes over to Antonio who was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
"Gee, thanks. Just what I wanted to hear. And I amtired."
"I don't get why you don't just go back to bed. Hell, Francis and Alistair are
still asleep. It's not like you're the only one still recovering from the
game."
In the end, the game had lasted four hours and Slytherin had won. Francis
caught the snitch, but only just before Arthur did. No one else had any major
injuries after the game to deal with except Yao. Turned out that Gilbert's hit
had all but shattered a few bones in his hand. Christian was walking around
with a bludger sized bruise on his stomach but was otherwise unharmed. Alistair
had taken a hit to the leg but was only bruised from it. While no one else got
hurt, it wasn't from lack of trying, especially from the Gryffindor side.
Gilbert and Alistair had proved their point and taken out the Gryffindor keeper
after Gilbert was hit, so they focused on protecting their team members. Ivan
insisted that he didn't need it, but Natalia bullied him into accepting help
after he narrowly dodged an incoming bludger. He was the one nearly stationary
target and the only keeper playing; of course he was going to be attacked.
Despite what he and Alistair had done to injure the Gryffindors, they clearly
had the support of at least half the crowd, which was more than they usually
got. The Hufflepuffs seemed at least partially on their side and Gilbert had to
resist looking for Matthew the entire game. He probably wouldn't have been too
difficult to spot, especially if he wasn't wearing a hat, but he didn't want to
be too obvious.
"I'm awake because I'm meeting someone to study after breakfast."
Antonio looked at him askance. "Wait, you're up to study? You usually get out
of bed before 11 on the weekends. Who are you meeting? Oh, wait." He looked at
him excitedly and Gilbert fought the urge to sigh. It was too early to be that
excited about anything. "Are you meeting that boy from your charms class?"
He didn't see the point in keeping it from him. If Gilbert didn't tell Antonio
now, he would just try and stay to find out anyway. "Yeah."
"Can I stay and meet him? I wanna know who's finally caught you."
"I can introduce you if you don't tell him that I'm trying to date him or act
weird."
"Why haven't you told him? It's not like you're known for subtly, Gil. Besides,
do you really think he'll say no?"
"I want him to know who I am before I ask him out, though I honestly don't know
what he would do. I've gotta say, this uncertainty thing is super unawesome."
"Can you at least tell me his name? Or, hell, his house?"
"He's a Hufflepuff, so he might know Lovino." Mentioning Lovino was a sure-fire
way to distract Antonio and it worked.
"Really? That would be the best, if he and Lovi were friends. Just think, Gil,
we could go on double dates—"
"We're not going on double dates."
"And if he wants to?"
"…No comment."
Antonio gave that odd laugh of his, though Gilbert guessed he couldn't really
talk. "Fusososo, you're already so whipped and you haven't even kissed him!
That's okay, though. Being whipped means you get the guy."
Gilbert glared at him balefully. "Tonio, please stop talking, just for a
minute. Thanks."
Antonio continued laughing at him and Gilbert slouched to rest his head on his
arms. If he could just close his eyes for a minute, that would be—
"Hey, Gil. Are you alright?"
Gilbert jolted upright and blinked his eyes to find Matthew looking at him like
he was amused and concerned. He was standing by the empty space to Gilbert's
left and looked much more awake than Gilbert felt. "Hey, Mattie. I'm fine, just
tired. Here, sit down."
"Thanks. If you're too tired to meet with me that's—"
"No, I'm good." He rubbed at his eyes and Antonio cleared his throat behind
him. Dammit. "Mattie, this asshole behind me is my friend, Antonio. Antonio,
this is Matthew, my friend from charms."
"It's nice to meet you, Matthew!" Antonio said happily, holding out a hand in
front of Gilbert.
Matthew looked mildly uncomfortable as he shook Antonio's hand. "We've actually
met before, but it's nice to see you again."
"Wait, really? Where?"
"Um…lots of places? But it's okay that you don't remember. Not many people do."
Matthew laughed depreciatively and looked away, his face turning red. What the
fuck?
"Dude, what the hell? How do you not remember meeting him? Multiple times
apparently."
Antonio frowned, like he was trying to remember something. "I'm sorry, Matthew.
My brain probably just isn't working right this morning. How did we meet?"
Matthew shrunk in on himself a little and Gilbert knew he wouldn't like the
answer before he even opened his mouth. "Lovino introduced us? I'm, well, kinda
his best friend?"
Oh, shit.
Antonio looked shocked. "Then I owe both you and Lovino an apology. I'll find a
way to make it up to both of you."
"You really don't have to…"
"Why don't you go think about that, Tonio? Think hard." Gilbert said, glaring
at his friend who started nodding and stood.
"That's a good idea, Gil. See you both later."
When Antonio left, Gilbert turned and saw Matthew looking smaller than usual
and sad. What was worse, he looked resigned. "I'm sorry, Gil. I shouldn't have
said anything about that."
"Mattie, there's absolutely no reason for you to apologize, okay? He has no
excuse for not remembering you and that's not your fault."
Matthew glanced at him and smiled slightly, but it was still sad. He looked
back at the table to say, "You shouldn't be mad at him, Gil. It's really not
his fault. Not many people remember me. Some don't even see me. I'm just not
very…noticeable? Maybe forgettable is the word. Hah. Um, maybe I should go?"
"What? Wait, no." Gilbert grabbed Matthew hand where it was braced against the
table to help him stand. "Please, don't go."
Matthew looked at him and Gilbert was distressed to see that his eyes were
shinny. He watched as Matthew closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he sat
down. "Right. Sorry, I forgot I was here to help you with charms homework. What
exactly did—"
"Forget about charms for a second, okay? Did you really mean what you said?
That you think you're forgettable? Because you're really not."
Matthew's made a fist beneath his hand and kept his eyes closed as he said, "Of
course I meant it, Gil. What other way can I explain people looking through me,
forgetting my name as soon as they're told, rarely acknowledging if I say
something, or acting like I don't exist? I'm basically invisible. I'm sure
you've heard the rumors by now, about how people in our charms class claim
you're hunting someone but no one knows who. That's because people in my class,
that have been with me for almost five years now, can't remember who I am. How
else would you explain it?" He sounded very upset, but was so quiet that
Gilbert could barely hear him, like he didn't want him to know.
Gilbert wanted to hug him, but wasn't sure how he would react. He settled for
closing his hand around Matthew's fist. "I don't know how to explain it,
because it makes even less sense to me than charms theory or muggle politics. I
don't get how people can't see you because you're the first thing I see when I
walk into class. That was true the first day of this school year and its true
now. I can't imagine forgetting about you. Even if we had never spoken and
someone had asked me years from now who you were, my answer would have been,
'that beautiful boy in my charms class.' I'm so sorry other people can't see
you like I do, because if they did, they wouldn't be able to look away."
Matthew was staring at him slack jawed and Gilbert realized that he had shown
his hand. It was his turn to close his eyes and look away. He let go of
Matthew's hand and pulled out his stuff to work on. "Sorry. Bottom line, you
shouldn't have to deal with other people being idiots and I'm sorry you do.
Even if you aren't angry about it, I'll be angry enough for both of us. I'll
talk to Antonio, too. Now, you were saying something about charms?" He knew his
face was beet red and he was freaking out a little because Matthew still hadn't
said anything.
The silence stretched for a moment longer when Matthew asked softly, "Gil, are
you hunting me?"
Gilbert looked at him to see Matthew staring with a tentative expression on his
face. Gilbert swallowed and asked, "Would you want to be caught?"
He heard Matthew inhale sharply and watched his eyes darken. He licked his lips
and his eyes flicked for a brief second to Gilbert's mouth. "Yes."
"Then I don't want to hunt you." He watched the hurt flash across Matthew's
face before he began shutting down. Gilbert grabbed Matthew's hand again and
said, "I'd rather date you."
Matthew looked back at him, surprised and a little disbelieving. He blinked
several times at him and Gilbert smirked as he said, "I kinda need an answer,
Mattie."
"Yes. Holy shit, yes."
Gilbert grinned at him and laughed. "I think that's the first time I've heard
you curse. I think I'm shocked."
Matthew looked away and blushed, but kept on grinning. "Good thing you can't
hear my inner monologue, then. You would lose your mind at the sheer amount of
profanity that doesn't make it past my filter."
Gilbert quirked an eyebrow. "Profanity, huh? That sounds a little more involved
than just cursing."
Matthew flushed so red, Gilbert could practically feel the heat coming off of
his face.
"No, no, no! You must be jesting!"
Both Gilbert and Matthew jumped as a disembodied voice exclaimed in disgust.
The both looked around and were surprised to see more than one ghost appear
behind them. To their horror, it was their house ghosts.
The Fat Friar looked upset. "Baron! We're not supposed to interfere. Besides,
it turned out well. Hello, you two! Congratulations!"
"Aye, on pulling your heads out of your arses! You! How are you one of my
house? The boy was practically shouting that he wanted to kiss you and you
comment on his language?! Where is that accursed hat!?"
Horror turned into mutual mortification. Someone further down the table started
laughing at them and the Bloody Baron turned to narrow his eyes at the student.
The laughter stopped immediately. "What the hell are you laughing at, boy?"
"N-n-nothing, sir."
"Good. What are all you looking at? Are you hoping for a duel?"
Gilbert looked around as some people said a hasty no, sir while others just
shook their heads, eyes terrified, before turning away completely. Gilbert
turned back to their ghosts to find the Baron right in his face. "Sir?"
The Baron narrowed his eyes at him. "Don't muck this up."
"I won't, sir."
The Baron straightened and sniffed at him. "Courtship rituals have changed and
not for the better." The ghost stalked away and Gilbert felt like he could
breathe again.
The Friar sighed. "Don't worry about him, young one. See you around, Matthew,
and congratulations again."
"Thank you!" Matthew squeaked out, sounding stressed.
The Friar left and sound seemed to break out from everywhere. Gilbert looked
back to see a couple dozen people staring at them and he asked, "Think we
should go?"
"We should go."
Gilbert packed up his things and they moved to leave, post-haste. Someone wolf-
whistled and the couple all but ran out of the room.
Gilbert picked a direction and just started walking, Matthew not far behind
him. "Mattie, are you friends with my house ghost?"
"…We've spoken once or twice after a particularly bad day. The ghosts always
took pity on me because they saw what I went through. Even Peeves only lightly
teases me. Gil, where are we going?"
"I don't know. I just started walking in all honesty." The fact that Matthew
was friends with all the ghosts in the castle was only slightly worrying. "Do
you have a destination in mind?"
"One of the group study areas? There's one not far from here?"
"Sounds good." They turned down the next hall and Gilbert was able to relax a
bit now that they weren't being stared at by a good portion of the school.
"That was weird and horrifying, but you still want to date me, right?"
"Yeah, of course." Matthew's hand brushed his and Gilbert took a deep breath as
he held it. Matthew squeezed his hand a little and didn't let go. Gilbert
smiled and looked away, feeling silly but too happy to do much about it. "Can I
call you adorkable now?"
"I would have to find something equally embarrassing to call you."
"Worth it." They passed the next few moments in comfortable silence until
Gilbert started laughing at his thoughts. "What is it?"
"I can't believe I got called out by my house ghost for taking it slow."
"I appreciate you taking the time to get to know me, but he may have had a
point…" Matthew glanced at him from under his lashes and Gilbert pulled them to
a stop.
"Maybe I should correct my mistake, then." Gilbert stepped into Matthew's
personal space and put a hand to his face. He heard Matthew's breath become
shaky and-
"Gentlemen." Gilbert and Matthew literally jumped apart at each other at the
word and turned to see Headmistress McGonagall walking towards them with raised
eyebrows. "If you could please restrain yourselves, that would be much
appreciated."
"Yes, Headmistress."
"Mr. Williams, the Friar informed me as to the happy news, though that is not
why I sought you out. I need you to come with me. Your brother is meeting us in
my office."
Gilbert glanced at Matthew, half in disbelief that the ghost had told their
headmistress they had started dating, half in concern for why she wanted to see
him. Matthew seemed to share the same worry as he paled at the news. "Yes,
ma'am."
"Please breathe, Mr. Williams. You are not in any trouble."
"Yes, ma'am." Matthew glanced towards him and softly said, "See you."
"Yeah, later."
Matthew started walking towards McGonagall when she said, "Mr. Beilschmidt?"
"Yes, ma'am?"
"I would prefer that you would refrain from injuring my students, but you and
Mr. Kirkland played a very good game yesterday."
Holy shit. "Thank you, ma'am."
Matthew shot him a smile at the compliment but quickly turned to follow
McGonagall down the hall. This had been a strange morning, but now Matthew was
dating him, so it was all worth it. He could have done without the revelation
of other people not seeing him, though. Gilbert frowned at the memory and
changed his course to head to the library. He didn't think it could be natural
that people wouldn't notice Matthew like that. Antonio could be a little lost
sometimes, but he had a sharp mind for strategy and would never forget someone
if they were important to Lovino willingly. And who would forget a face like
his? Gilbert was a little biased, but objectively Matthew fit a lot of
conventional standards of beauty. Truthfully, if he was this gone on him now,
Gilbert couldn't imagine what he would look like in a few years or so when he
had finished growing up. Thatwas something to think about…
Back to the point, Gilbert wanted to do a little research on what could make
people invisible and forgettable to others but not a few. That, and he had lost
his tutor for his charms essay. The library was bound to have a book with the
answer.
===============================================================================
"Ma'am, may I ask you a question?" Matthew said as he and McGonagall traveled
through the castle.
"What is it, Mr. Williams?"
"Why would the Friar tell you specifically about my relationship status?"
She slightly smiled at him. "I wondered if you would ask. He told me because I
first asked him to look out for you once I realized your
particular…predicament. He and the other ghosts spoke to you voluntarily, but I
wanted to be sure you would have at least one person there for you until you
ran into someone who could remember you."
"Thank you for the forethought, Headmistress. Do you…do you know why most
people can't remember me? Is it something I'm doing wrong?"
McGonagall looked at him sharply and stopped walking. Matthew looked down and
away. Maybe he shouldn't have asked…
"Mr. Williams, have you been thinking for all these years that you were at
fault for your situation?"
"…Yes, ma'am."
"Good heavens, no."
Matthew looked up at her again to see her greatly disturbed at the new
information. "It's not?"
"No, it's not," She said, her voice remarkably kind. "Come. I will explain
further when we are with your brother." McGonagall started to walk faster than
before, with more urgency.
Matthew followed her in silence with more than enough to keep his thoughts
occupied. He was ecstatic that he and Gilbert had started dating, if a little
disturbed at the ghostly interjection. But what particularly earthshattering
was that he wasn't at fault for being invisible, no matter what Alfred had said
in jest. He couldn't think of anyone who would wish this on him, so he guessed
it was something he was born with. Just another unexpected side effect of his
lineage. Fucking brilliant.
They approached a stone spiral staircase with a statue of a bird of prey in the
center. Matthew's eyes widened as they ascended the stairs, having never been
to McGonagall's office before. He looked around the rather large office space,
full of neatly organized magical artifacts, a wall of moving portraits, and his
very energetic brother.
It was sometimes difficult for Matthew to understand how he and Alfred could
look so alike and yet so different. Where Matthew was pale and had a slighter
build, Alfred was tanned to a solid tawny and looked more athletic from
exercise. Both of them had lightly golden hair, though Alfred's was short and
fell straight with a cowlick and Matthew's was a bit wavy and had a stubborn,
wayward curl. Their eyes were both unusual shades of blue, though Matthew's
were closer to a dark purple than Alfred's ocean. Alfred had hit puberty maybe
a month before Matthew, so he was taller. If it weren't for the insistence of
their mother, he would think they were fraternal twins rather than identical.
"Good morning, Headmistress. Hi, Mattie!"
Matthew smiled back softly. "Hi, Alfred."
"Good morning, Mr. Jones. Please, both of you, have a seat."
Most people didn't realize they were twins until they were told, despite the
fact that their faces had damn near the same features. That was partially
because they had different last names. Their mother had refused to change her
name when she married their father, who was perfectly fine with that, even
willing to change his name to hers. When she found out he was the last of his
family line, she insisted that he at least passed it on to one of their
children. Neither of them expected to be having twins, but it meant that
Matthew had gotten their father's last name and Alfred their mother's.
"Neither of you are in any sort of trouble but I've received a letter from your
mother. As you both know, she has been researching what your particular
heritage and gender entails and has come across a few possibilities that needed
immediate attention and preparation. She had several on the list, but based on
my conversation with you, Mr. Williams, the first pertains to the inheritance
of her charm.
"As you are identical twins, your DNA should be exact copies of each other.
However, we are both of the belief that the fact that you're descended from
different species may have confused the human biology. Full blooded, mature
Veela have complete control of their charm, though they can never fully turn it
off. We think that when you became two separate entities, the nature of your
natural charm split as well. Mr. Jones, you've naturally inherited the ability
to attract people, though you may never be able to pass unnoticed. Mr.
Williams, you've inherited the ability to confuse people's memories of you and
hide in plain sight. Very few people will be able to constantly see you until
you learn to control that ability. Both of you may be able to moderate these
traits once you reach maturity, though that brings up other issues."
Of course it did. Having a Veela for a mother had made life interesting, but
not exactly easy. But at this point, Matthew was excited to learn that there
was an end to this hell of being invisible. Maybe. But maybe was better than
never.
"Your mother is uncertain of exactly when you'll start exhibiting more signs of
your heritage or even ifyou will and what those might be. You may very well
pass through life for the most part like your father, though considering the
fact you've been living with the effects of natural charm since birth, your
parents and I find that possibility highly unlikely. Veela have important
landmarks on their birthdays, which makes you very fortunate to have the
anniversary of your births fall in July. I am certain that you are aware, but I
just want to emphasize that, at the end of the maturation process, you will be
fully grown adults, probably looking to be around twenty or twenty-one years of
age. But beyond growing pains, you'll also be experiencing other symptoms of
your mother's bloodline which may cause you difficulties.
"The most likely problem you may face are your reactions to anger and emotions
akin to anger. While we doubt you would fully transform into something similar
to harpies, some minor transformations may occur such as a change in eye color,
vocal range, claws that would not change the basic structures of your hands,
and modifications to your teeth, as well as increased strength. We all highly
doubt that you would sprout a beak, wings, feathers, scales, talons, or the
sudden ability to throw fireballs. While you're reaching maturity, you may find
yourself closer to your emotions, which is why your mother sent this to me as
soon as possible.
"If you find yourself feeling like you are out of control, I ask that you seek
either myself, Hagrid, or immediately head to the hospital wing. There are very
few people would be able to calm you if you flew into a rage or contain you
until it had passed. There will be a room set up in the hospital wing for
containment and recovery the moment either one of you start experiencing
symptoms. Do you have any questions thus far?"
Both Matthew and Alfred were quiet for a moment before Matthew ventured, "What
would trigger both the start of our maturation and a rage?"
"Unless something happens in the next few months, we are expecting you to start
seriously experiencing symptoms on your sixteenth birthday with the worst of it
happening on your seventeenth. As for what would start it early…I will return
to in a second. Rages can be sparked by anything that outrages you to your
core, though they are usually linked to a direct insult or threat to your
person or someone you care about. Mr. Jones, I'm sure you can see where this
may become a problem in your Quidditch matches."
Alfred paled, "Yes, ma'am."
"Mr. Williams, you may want to avoid attending any matches where one of your
friends are participating." McGonagall leveled a measured look at him and he
was grateful that she didn't specifically name Slytherin games as something to
avoid. Alfred was thoroughly unaware that he ever had a crush on Gilbert (and
lowkey on Alistair), let alone the possibility that they were dating. That
probably wouldn't last long, but since living people can't remember who he is…
"Understood, ma'am."
"Anger is the most common cause of the most dangerous transformations but I've
been informed that…minor ones can occur when one is experiencing an extreme of
any emotion. As such, I would suggest that, if you were going to inform someone
of your heritage but keep it a general secret, you would only do so with the
people you would trust implicitly and who will see you at your most out of
control. A point which brings me to the last major issue your mother wrote of."
McGonagall seemed to brace herself before she started speaking again.
"There's the possibility that you may encounter your fated mates while at
school. I assume you know the basics of the concept?"
Oh, shit. It was a little-known fact that most Veela had mates that they were
drawn to like their race usually drew possible sexual partners in general. The
idea that all Veela drew men was a myth. What would a lesbian Veela want with
men? What would the rare male Veela want with men if he wasn't attracted to
them?
Mates to Veela were the ones they often settled down with, the one person they
were drawn to more than any other and were made for. If a Veela was lucky,
their mate would also be a Veela or in another way immortal. However, most
Veela mates were human. Matthew had once asked his mother what Veelas did when
their mortal mates died. She explained that they had a couple of choices: they
could die voluntarily or wait until their mate was reincarnated in another time
and place but were otherwise free to do as they please. They did not have to
option to become mortal. Not a few chose to die voluntarily after some time
rather than watching generations of their children die as they lived. She also
described having lost a mate after living with one as a chronic ache, one you
could move past but you would never be free of until you found your mate once
more. It was difficult to come across a fated mate, as they were the equivalent
to the muggle concept of soulmates.
"Yes, we're familiar. But I didn't think that we would have them since we're
only half."
"Good, and it turns out that you will probably have mates, too. Your mother
fears that, in a school so full of witches and wizards, that you will find your
mates here." It was a reasonable concern; one reason full blooded Veela took so
long to find mates is that they had limited contact with the larger wizarding
world for centuries if not millennia. "She does not personally know any Veela
that found their mate prior to maturation and thinks that it may be something
to trigger early symptoms. However, she does think that the main transformation
is still restricted to your birthday. She wrote you both individual letters to
explain that further. This would all be fine, a happy occasion, but one of the
primary causes of Veela rage is a threat or insult to their mate. Hogwarts is a
wonderful institution, but it is still the muggle equivalent to high school and
sixth form. You see where this could become a problem?"
"Yes." Matthew felt a little dizzy.
Alfred asked, quietly for once, "How would we know if they're our mate?"
"Your mother mentioned something about finding out if you had contact with them
for sure on your upcoming birthday, so I assume it is in your letter. However,
if you start experiencing symptoms now when you're with someone, especially a
romantic partner, and you're not enraged, you probably have your answer. If
there's someone you're specifically drawn to, more than you would expect, then
you might want to start there. I'm told that the eyes always change first and
return to human last. If your eyes become a glowing ice blue with vertical
pupils, you need to either extract yourself from the situation or explain what
is going on."
"How can we control ourselves, both when we feel ourselves going into a rage
and if we run into our mates?"
McGonagall pursed her lips. "I would try traditional anger management
techniques. But, to be perfectly honest, Mr. Williams, I simply don't know."
Matthew and Alfred shared a panicked glance. Oh, fuck. We're screwed.
===============================================================================
"So, like, on a scale of 1 to 10, how fucked are we?"
"Individually or together?"
"Individually."
"I'm at about a 12. I would put you at 20. You've always had a shorter fuse."
"Together?"
"About 100. If the other breaks and goes into a rage, then the other is
implicated by sheer genetics."
"…So, uber-boned?"
"Yep."
They were quiet for a minute or two, contemplating what the next school year or
so was going to be like for them. They were sitting on the floor outside
McGonagall's office stairs, facing each other on opposite sides of the hall.
Matthew looked back down at his letter, wondering what he could have done in a
past life to earn this particular brand of fuckery.
My Dearest Matthew,
Hi, my baby. Your father and I were just talking about you and how much you
used to love polar bears when you were little, for no particular reason. I know
that's a little random, but I just wanted to remind you that we love you very
much and you are never truly forgotten.
Minerva's probably explained a lot of what I've learned in my travels. I'm
sorry that I couldn't sit you and your brother down to tell you in person. I
promise, as soon as you're home, I'm going to buy you a gallon of maple ice
cream and answer all your questions as best as I can. Feel free to write at any
time, too.
I wrote your letter separate from Alfred's because of what you've told me about
your fondness to that one Slytherin boy, Gilbert, and your anxieties over
telling your brother. I know you hadn't talked to him again when we last spoke
over winter break, but I would encourage you to try and see if he can remember
you, dear. If he can, and if he grows to be fond of you, too, then you might
have already found your fated mate.
If this turns out to be true, I'm so happy for you! If not, that's okay, you
have your whole life to live yet. It would make your life easier since most of
what I tell you only applies if you know who your mate is. If you don't know
them on your birthday, I'll explain further what will happen. In any case, if
you happen to run into your mate before your sixteenth birthday, then symptoms
can start to show at any time you two touch that makes your heart race. The
degree of intimacy differs between Veela; on one extreme you have a brush a
hand against a sensitive spot and on the other you have intercourse.
Please note: you'll only show symptoms if the person you're with is in fact
your mate, but you still might not experience them until after your birthday.
If you do start showing symptoms with them, it might be good to explain your
heritage and that you're not dangerous to them. You are physically incapable of
harming your mate. I would hold off on telling them about the whole "fated to
be together" thing; mortals seem to find that an alarming concept for some
unfathomable reason.
The only way for you to make the visible symptoms disappear is by calming your
heartrate. If you fly into a rage because of a threat or insult to your mate,
only their continued presence and prolonged safety will calm you before you
burn out. Well, that or having sex with them, but, no matter how natural it is,
I would prefer to think that that particular stage in any of your relationships
is very far off.
If you don't meet or figure out who your mate is, then I am 95% sure that on
your sixteenth birthday, you'll have a shared dream with them where you are
being intimate. If you have met, then both of your identities will be clear to
each other. If not, then you will know the feel of the other person, but not
who they are. I'm a little iffy on which birthday, but between human and Veela
maturation periods, sixteen is a highly calculated guess.
If you know the identity of your mate and haven't told them you are part Veela
by your sixteenth birthday, then you're going to have some explaining to do
afterwards. The only time Veelas can consistently do partial transformations is
when they're having sex with their mates. The only things that change then are
your eyes and teeth. Your eyes will likely become a partially glowing ice blue
with vertical pupils and your teeth will grow one set of upper and lower fangs.
When your teeth manifest for the first time, it will hurt and bleed for a bit,
but will heal relatively quickly. You will have to focus to retract them. While
that is enough to explain alone, in the dream, you would be formally claiming
your mate. This would include ritual words of exchange between the two of you
and you biting your mate deep enough to leave a visible scar, most likely on
their shoulder. Sex is the only time you will be able to cause actual physical
damage to your mate, but even then the pain won't last long. Your fangs are
naturally coated in a substance that is pleasurable and healing to your mate
and like acid to anyone else. When I say that you are made for them, I mean it
quite literally.
Because you are only half Veela, your fangs may manifest in a rage because you
will not have a beak. If this happens, you will need to hide your mouth until
you're able to retract your fangs. This will take at least until the bleeding
has stopped and then you will have to concentrate to retract them. No, you
cannot just push them back up. Yes, this will make all future appointments to
the dentist very interesting.
If your mate happens to also be male, then I do not think it matters who tops
when you claim them. I would do as the dream will suggest, just in case.
One last thing, my dear one, and this is important. If you know the identity of
your mate by your sixteenth, you're supposed to claim them one year after the
dream takes place. So, for instance, if Gilbert turns out to be your mate then,
whether or not you are dating already, you would have to woo him within a year
and claim him on your seventeenth birthday. If not, you can claim him later,
but it will make your seventeenth birthday excruciatingly painful for you. The
presence of your mate eases the transition into maturity tremendously. However,
once you claim them, you are bonded for life.
That's everything I have for you now. Even if you don't have any questions,
write to me anyway! Let me know how preparations for your O.W.L.s are going and
if you need anything. Also, how's Lovino doing? Is he still holding off on
Antonio? And PLEASE let me know if Gilbert turns out to be your mate. I want to
know who I need to be welcoming into the family!
Love always,
Mom
Dear Matthew,
I just read what your mother has written. I'm overwhelmed and it's not even for
me! I love her dearly, but she sometimes doesn't understand how some things are
terrifying to mortals. I just wanted to tell you that, from the mate's
perspective, life is great. I mean, it got a little weird after the claiming
process and WOW, was that an adjustment period! But seriously, I can't imagine
life without her. Good luck with your classes. I know you'll do wonderfully.
Love,
Dad
"Hey, Alfred?"
"Yeah?"
"Did Dad leave a worrying but unhelpful message for you at the end? About how
life got weird after the claiming thing?"
"Yep. I have no fuckin' clue what that means."
"Great."
"Do you have an idea of who your mate might be?"
Matthew looked up to see Alfred regarding him carefully. He frowned, looked his
brother in the eye, and lied through his teeth. "No, I've got no clue. It's not
like many people see me and I knowit's not Lovi. You?"
Alfred sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Nah, but I'm worried. I've
screwed over so many people, Mattie. If one of them is my mate, what the fuck
am I going to do?"
Yikes. That was a fair point, but Matthew looked at him quizzically. "What
about Arthur? He's your friend, right? You haven't screwed him over as far as I
know."
"Artie's great, but he would never want to be with me. Besides, I'm pretty sure
him and the Slytherin seeker are together, at the very leastin the Biblical
sense."
Matthew cringed. "I did not need to know the last part of that sentence."
"Yeah, me neither." Alfred sighed and stood, placing his letter back in the
envelope. "Here's the big question: do we keep us a secret?"
Matthew folded his letter and stood as well, Alfred giving him a hand up.
"Yeah, as long as we can. You know people can be dicks to those who are
different and we're already going to be putting up with enough shit. We're both
going to have to learn to control our emotions. I know I'm going to tell
Lovino, though, as soon as I start showing symptoms. You?"
"I'll probably tell Artie when I start showing, too."
"Wait, shit. I might have to tell Lovi now. I'm pretty sure the only reason
he's not with the guy he likes is because he can't remember me. Once he knows
that he can't, then he'll be out of excuses."
Alfred looked at him for a long moment before shrugging. "Okay. If you trust
him, I trust him. I'm still going to wait, though."
"Okay. Where are you headed?"
Alfred looked at his watch then down to his stomach. "I'm going to find food.
You?"
"I was meeting with a study partner for help in my defense class when
McGonagall pulled me away. I'm going to go track him down."
"Sounds good. Wait! A study partner?" Alfred's eyes grew mischievous and he
smiled slowly at him. Matthew groaned.
"Yes, a study partner. He remembers me and was nice enough to agree to help
me." That technically wasn't a lie.
"Do you liiiiiike him?"
Matthew couldn't help the blush but looked away. "Yes, but I'm not going to
tell you who it is. I swear, Alfred, don't try and interfere. It's really hard
for me to find people and—"
"Whoa, chill, Mattie. I know how hard it is for you. I'll make sure to keep my
distance but I'm happy for you, really."
Matthew relaxed. "Thanks, Alfred. I really appreciate it."
"Eh, what are big brothers for?" Alfred grinned at him and Matthew gave him a
shove.
"You're older by three minutes, you dick."
"Older is older, Mattie. I am also much taller than you."
"Not for long. Enjoy it now. I bet I'll get taller than you."
"Oh, yeah? How much?"
"I don't know. I'll think of something."
"Yeah, you do that." They laughed together and hit the turn where they would
need to separate.
"I'm headed to the library. See you, Alfred."
"Later, bro! Love you!"
"Love you, too. Now go feed that beast you call a stomach."
Alfred walked away laughing and Matthew turned with a smile. Hopefully he would
find Gilbert in the library (and if not, he would check the group study areas)
and then he would find Lovino. It was hard to find any truly private space in
the castle, so he would have to put the charms he had been practicing with
Flitwick in the off-hours to the test.
===============================================================================
"Need some help?"
Gilbert looked up at the whispered inquiry to find Matthew standing across the
table from him, smiling but looking a little stressed. He smiled in greeting,
still tired but happy. "Sure. This charms essay is killing me slowly. But are
you okay? You look like you've gotten some bad news or something."
Matthew winced and moved to sit beside him. "I'm okay, my brother's okay, and
no one's hurt or anything. My family's just…complicated."
"Alright, that's good. Who is your brother, if you don't mind me asking?"
Matthew raised his eyebrows at him. "You don't know? We're identical twins."
Gilbert shrugged. "I meant what I said that night. I could never confuse you
with anyone else."
Matthew blushed lightly and ducked his head like he was embarrassed. "You might
not believe me then, but Alfred's my brother. Alfred Jones. He's a beater for
Gryffindor."
Gilbert squinted his eyes at him. He honestly couldn't see it. "I believe you,
but I think you look completely different than he does. Also, the last names
kinda throw me."
"I figured that second part. Like I said, my family's complicated. Do you have
siblings?"
Gilbert couldn't help grinning. "Yeah. I have a little brother named Ludwig,
though I call him West. He's a fourth-year in Ravenclaw. No sense of humor, but
he's wicked smart and very responsible."
"You sound like you're proud of him."
"I am. He's a great kid, though I think he needs to learn to relax."
"SHH!" Someone shushed them from the next table over. Gilbert rolled his eyes
but did lower is voice even more.
"Anyway, I'm glad you found me. I've most worked through the theory but could
you help me figure out this last bit? Then I can help you with your homework."
Matthew smiled at him and Gilbert still couldn't believe that he got the boy
next to him to agree to a date. "Sounds good to me."
===============================================================================
"So, a little birdie told me—and by little birdie I mean every one of my
informants—that Gilbert Beilschmidt got himself a date in the Great Hall, only
to be called out by the Bloody fucking Baron for not kissing whomever it was
then to be blessed by the Fat Friar. Then they ran out of the room when people
started catcalling them. The strangest thing is, not a single goddamn person
can tell me who it was. I'm guessing you have news for me?"
Matthew looked at Lovino as the energetic Italian walked further into their
dorm room. Vash and Nate were still out, so now was as good a time as ever to
talk to him about everything. "I've got a date with Gilbert for later this
week."
"Hell fuckin' yes you do! What did I tell you? I told you he wanted you. And I
was right!" Lovino tackled him into a hug on the bed. "I'm so happy for you,
you fuckin' bastard."
Matthew laughed and patted Lovino on the back, knowing not to go anywhere near
his hair. "You say the sweetest things, Lovi. Yes, you were right. Gilbert even
tried to kiss me later before we were interrupted by the Headmistress."
"Whoa, what?" Lovino sat up, confused. Nothing caught Lovino's attention faster
than news from around the school that he hadn't heard. "I didn't hear anything
about that. What's going on? Are you okay?"
Matthew licked his lips and knew he sounded nervous when he said, "I'm mostly
okay. If I told you something, would you promise not to freak out on me or tell
anyone else?"
Lovino blinked his hazel eyes at him, startled and clearly worried. "Of course.
You're really starting to fuckin' scare me, Mattie. What's wrong?"
"Hold on. I have to cast a shield charm I've been working on to make sure no
one over hears us."
Lovino's eyes widened and his mouth gaped open, but he didn't say another word.
Matthew drew his wand and closed his eyes to concentrate. It wasn't the full
charm that he was working on, but it should be enough for now. "Nonaudire
protego totalum."
Matthew felt as the energy flowed through his wand into the air. He visualized
the exact dimensions of the bubble he was creating, leaving just enough room
for if Lovino wanted to get up and pace. Maintaining the sound barrier would
drain his energy, but he had about thirty minutes before he passed out to
explain everything.
He opened his eyes to see Lovino looking around, shocked. The edges of his
barrier were visible, something he was still working to erase. He was breathing
heavily but said, "We can talk now. No one can hear us."
"Okay, first of all, what the fuck is this?"
"Sound bubble. I've been working on my shield charms and this one will block
the sound flowing out from a space of my choosing. It's draining, so we have
about thirty minutes."
"What happens in thirty minutes?"
"If I'm still maintaining the spell at this strength? I pass out."
Lovino stared at him. "This is really fucking drastic. Did you kill someone? Do
you need me to help hide the body and cover-up the evidence?"
Matthew laughed lightly. "No, Lovi, I haven't killed anyone."
"Are you dying?"
"What? No."
Lovino almost collapsed on himself from relief. "Thank God. What the fuck is
wrong with you, scaring me like that? I can handle everything else with ease.
Okay, almost everything else. You're not sleeping with my brother are you?"
"What? No! Where did that even come from?"
"Don't worry about it, just checking. Ya never know. What's wrong? We've got to
apparently wade through some shit before you pass out."
"I found out why people can't remember me today. It's not anything I can
control right now and I was born with it, so you can stop being mad at Antonio
for it and just date him already." When Lovino just stared at him again, he
shrugged. "You said we were short for time. That was the highlights."
"Mattie, why were you born like this? Why can only a few people like me and
Gilbert remember you?" Uh-oh. If Lovino had stopped cursing, that meant he was
really worried.
"Promise you won't freak out?"
"I'm gonna start freaking out if you don't just fuckin' tell me!"
"My mother is a Veela and, when Alfred and I were born, a lesser version of
Veela charm that we inherited split unevenly. He draws everyone's attention and
most people are incapable of seeing or remembering me. I don't know what makes
you and Gilbert among the few people who are different."
Lovino went back to staring. Only, this time, he really seemed to see Matthew,
his eyes focusing for seconds at a time on his individual features. The white-
gold hair, blue eyes, and pale skin weren't exactly flashing lights advertising
his genetics, but once it was mentioned, it probably became obvious.
"Okay…Why did you think I would freak out about this? It's not like it changes
who you are."
Matthew breathed a massive sigh of relief. "I just wasn't sure how you would
react. No, it won't change who I am, but it may make me…act differently over
the next year or so."
Lovino laughed a little hysterically. "Then it's no big deal. I mean, it's not
like you're going to fucking lose it one day and turn into a goddamn harpy on
the quad, right?" When Matthew didn't answer immediately, he blinked and
sobered almost immediately. "Wait, could that actually happen?"
Matthew winced. "Not exactly…"
Matthew explained the meeting in McGonagall's office and what might happen if
he got angry enough. "…But since I trust you, you might be one of the few
people capable of helping me calm down."
Lovino had started pacing halfway through the explanation. "Shit. Shit. Fucking
Christ. We're going to make this work. Just, don't bite me, okay?"
"I wouldn't on purpose. I'm 99.9% sure it would burn you like acid."
Lovino looked him, horrified. "What the fuck, Mattie?"
"That's what I thought, t-too." Matthew suddenly became lightheaded and short
of breath. He braced himself on his bed and Lovino was at his side in an
instant to help steady him. He felt something on his upper lip and wiped a
shaky hand across it. It came away red.
"Mattie, you need to stop this spell. You told me what I need to know, there's
no reason to—"
"There's one more thing." He was taking gulping breaths. "I think I need to lay
down."
"Just fucking tell me later, okay?"
"No, we have at least five minutes, maybe ten."
"If you think I'm going to stand here and let you push yourself until you pass
out, you've got another thing coming."
"Alfred and I were born with predestined mates. If I meet mine before my next
birthday, then next year is going to be more difficult. Nearly any insult or
threat to my mate that I am aware of will force me to go into a rage that only
they will be able to bring me down from before I pass out."
Lovino paled and looked he was the one who was about to lose consciousness.
"Oh, shit. That is important."
"It gets worse. If I am in prolonged contact with them, I might start showing
symptoms early."
"How does a half-Veela identify their mate? Do you know what to look for, or
are you just in limbo with this?"
"My mate would be the one person that I am attracted to who is also attracted
to me in the stereotypical Veela sense."
"Wait, but…" Lovino's eyes darted back and forth quickly in front of him, eyes
unseeing as his mind worked furiously. Then he focused once more on Matthew
with a look of horror. "Matthew, the Quidditch game. Do you think…?"
"Yeah. If I had to take a wild guess, Gilbert's my mate. The problem is, the
only way I have to test it before my birthday is touching him."
"Okay, I know the basics enough to talk around the issue. Now, take down the
damn spell."
Matthew thought for a moment, making sure that he had hit all the major points
for alarm before pointing his wand towards the ceiling and whispering,
"Finite."
The spell dissolved and Matthew felt like a weight had been lifted from his
chest. He also felt very tired.
"Can you avoid touching him?"
Matthew looked at him balefully. "I could, but I won't. One problem with the
whole business is that if he turns out to be what I think he is, I have to get
him to agree to let me claim him on my seventeenth birthday or face maddening
pain."
"Holy fuck, why?"
"I don't know, that was never explained. But, Lovi, I probably wouldn't stay
away from him, anyway. I've been drawn to him for two years; do you really
think I would resist him now? Also, I honestly don't know how I would react to
seeing him with anyone else. Jealousy was never covered explicitly, but I don't
doubt that's one of the triggers for a rage."
Lovino plopped down on his bed and stared at him. "Fuck. I need a drink."
"You and me both."
"I'll talk to Antonio, see when the next batch of fire whiskey comes in. He
thinks I don't know, but I do."
"What about the other thing? Now that you know it isn't his fault that he can't
remember your best friend…" Matthew trailed off.
"Shut up, you asshole. Maybe I'll let the bastard take me out. And, as I've
said many-a-time before, only if you admit you're attracted to Alistair. Wait.
You're only supposed to be attracted to your person, right? How are you
attracted to both of them?"
Matthew rolled his eyes. "It's not like having a mate makes me blind, Lovi."
"Okay, but you've only everbeen attracted to them, right?"
Matthew threw his hands up at Lovino's pointed look. "Fine, yes. I'm super
attracted to Alistair, so what? We've never spoken and I only ran into him
once." It had been a memorable experience. Matthew had snuck out during his
fourth year, really just getting the hang of sneaking around the castle at
night. He had made a wrong turn and ended up in the same corridor as a rather
busy couple whom he didn't see until the last second. It had startled him more
than anything, not because couples were a rare occurrence in the shadowed
alcoves of the castle at night but the identities of the occupants.
Because his luck was shit, it was Gilbert and Alistair.
By that point, he had been crushing on Gilbert for a year and was able to
recognize him from mop of silver hair, in thorough disarray from Alistair's
hand, and figure. His mouth had been too interested in Alistair's neck to put
his face to the little light available. Alistair, on the other hand, had had
his back to the wall and his legs around Gilbert's waist. His mouth, darkened
and swollen from Gilbert's kisses, had been parted in silent panting, his eyes
were closed in obvious enjoyment and his neck was arched against the stone,
giving Gilbert ready access. They were still wearing all of their clothes, but
it had been one of the most erotic sights Matthew had seen and he had drawn in
a sharp, but quiet, breath.
Matthew had barely heard the rush of air, so he was shocked to his core when
Alistair opened his eyes and immediately locked eyes with Matthew's. Matthew
placed a hand over his mouth, feet seemingly stuck to the floor, and held his
gaze. When it was clear Alistair wasn't going to say anything, Matthew dropped
his hand from his mouth and bit his lip. Alistair, after a moment where he
seemed utterly fascinated with him, licked his lips and smiled. Matthew had
been scarcely breathing, heartbeat racing, when Gilbert did something that made
Alistair moan and his eyes flutter close. Shaking himself, Matthew had fled,
but had been attracted to Alistair ever since. They never had a reason to
interact, so Matthew assumed that Alistair forgot him like everyone else. He
had denied the attraction for the longest because Alfred was at least half in
love with Arthur and that would be too weird. Besides, it was pathetic enough
to have an impossible crush on one person, let alone two.
Matthew continued to Lovino with, "Out of the two of them, though, Gilbert's
more likely to be the person and now you're out of excuses. Promise me you'll
talk to Antonio."
Lovino looked triumphant. "Sure. I promise."
"About dating him, Lovi. Don't just talk about the weather or something."
Lovino pouted. "Fine, ya bastard. I'll talk to him about dating."
Matthew started to grin at him only to have it freeze on his face. "Oh, shit."
"Fuck, it's never good if you start cursing. What did you think of now? A
dragon on a rampage on campus? A sudden rash of stink bombs ready to go off
around the school?"
"Gilbert introduced me to Antonio today. He may have been pissed that he didn't
remember me when I explained that you had introduced us before."
"Fuck. Mattie, did your mother or McGonagall say anything about how mates would
act when you find them?"
"…No. My Dad had only said that things had gotten weird after the claiming, but
he didn't say how."
"Do you think he's just as protective of you as you are of him? I mean, if he's
attracted to you like most men are to most Veela…"
"Oh, shit."
===============================================================================
Gilbert all but stumbled into the Slytherin common room that evening, exhausted
but with his homework done for the next day. He blearily cleared the bridge and
started to make a beeline straight for his bed when a cacophony of sound hit
him. He looked around confusedly as his housemates catcalled and whistled at
him.
He abruptly remembered his encounter with the Baron that morning. Ah, shit.
Please, God, let me go to sleep.
Gilbert wearily glared at everyone and said, "Harass me about it tomorrow. I'm
going to sleep."
"Honhonhon, non, mon ami, we will not wait any longer! It is not every day
someone is criticized by our Baron for not taking what is offered!" Francis
came up to clap him on the shoulder and Gilbert shrugged him off.
"How about no? Good night." Gilbert turned and strode purposefully towards the
boys dormitories.
"Aw, don't be like that! At least tell us who it was?"
Gilbert froze mid-motion then turned around. He could tell that his expression
was probably too sharp for what the question called for if the reactions of the
younger Slytherins were anything to go by, but he didn't particularly care.
"What do you mean, you don't know? I was called out by a murderous ghost and
then blessed by a dead friar for asking him out in front of damn near a quarter
of the school, and no one knows who I'm dating?"
The room was silent until Francis shrugged. "Basically, yes."
Un-fucking-believable. "No one finds that odd? Even a little?" Silence again.
"How many of you are fifth years?"
"…About ten of us here," a boy with curly black hair responded.
"Were any of you there?" A couple of nods. "You didn't recognize who I was
sitting with?"
They looked between themselves, and all Gilbert saw were blank stares and
frowns of concentration. "No."
Had he stepped into the Twilight Zone without realizing it? "Where's Antonio? I
introduced them by name. He didn't tell you?"
"I'm right here, mi amigo, and I know you introduced me to him, but I don't
remember his name or what he looks like." Antonio called from the back of the
room, looking mildly disturbed.
"He's Lovino's best friend, Tonio. You had met before?"
Now he looked extremely bothered. "Gil, I literally can't recall who that is. I
know he exists as an abstract concept, but I don't know anything about him."
Gilbert looked around the room to see a lot of uncomfortable faces. If he had
been in doubt that Matthew's condition was not natural or at least magically
based, he wasn't now.
"Okay, no one can harass me about what happened until you figure out who the
fuck I'm dating. Now, I'm going to sleep. Do not bother me for the next twelve
hours."
Gilbert stalked down the hallway and slammed his door shut. Alistair, who was
sitting on his bed, reading, looked up at him and raised an eyebrow. "Ye look
like shite."
"Thanks, Scottie. I feel like it."
Gilbert stormed around the room, organizing his stuff and trying to get ready
for bed, feeling Alistair carefully watching him the whole time. Finally, he
said, "Something you want to share with the class?"
"Congrats on yer date. Happy ta know the work we did at tha game didn't go ta
waste."
Gilbert stopped moving and looked over at his friend. Alistair didn't deserve
the shit he was slinging at him. "Sorry. Yeah, thanks for the help. I could
have done without the otherworldly interference, but when is that ever not
true?"
Alistair laughed lightly and looked back at his book, turning the page. "I
can't wait ta meet this Matthew of yers. Has ta be interestin' if he's got ye
yellin' at the entire feckin' house after twelve hours."
"You heard that? Wait, you remember what I told you about him?"
Alistair shrugged. "Yeah. Gorgeous Hufflepuff with a heart of gold. Why?"
"Don't you think it's weird that no one remembers him after meeting him or even
seeing him?"
"Sure, but what can I do about it? I don't know if I'll remember him after
seeing him even with tha foreknowledge."
"Do you have any idea what could do that? Make someone all but nonexistent to
the majority of people?"
Alistair thought for a second and Gilbert continued to get ready to go to
sleep. "Maybe a curse? It's too pervasive ta be a jinx."
"Yeah, that's what I thought, too, but all the curses I looked up made sure
that there were no exceptions to people forgetting about the targets. Matthew
has at least a few people who can remember him, so he can't have any of the
curses I found."
"Ye remember 'em. Why is it botherin' ye so much?"
"He thinks it's his fault, Scottie. That there's nothing unusual about not
being able to be seen or remembered because that's all he's ever known."
Alistair cringed. "Point taken. I'll help ye when I can an' I would still like
ta meet 'em, but I honestly have no feckin' clue where to start wit it. Maybe
ask Professor Patil? She would prob'ly be tha most likely person ta know after
McGonagall."
"Good point."
Gilbert left the room to wash up and returned to find Alistair in the same
position. "Oi, ye gonna tell me what yer doin' fer yer date?"
"I have no clue. There's no fucking privacy in this damned castle. Any ideas?"
Alistair laughed. "Nope."
"Fuck."
===============================================================================
Matthew approached the Quidditch pitch on Thursday afternoon, curious as to
what Gilbert had planned. This was one of the few times during the week that
their schedules were both free during the day and Gilbert had asked him for a
date after charms on Tuesday. Matthew had readily agreed, though he wasn't sure
why they were meeting out here. Afternoons later in the week were usually when
the teams practiced for upcoming games. There was a Slytherin-Ravenclaw game on
Saturday, so he didn't think the pitch would be free. No one was likely to be
out here for fun today, the late March air abnormally cold. There was no snow
on the ground, so people usually darted between buildings quickly to get out of
the elements. Even Matthew felt it, if only slightly. Since Veela were built to
be perpetually graceful and appealing, they were able to be comfortable in most
temperatures. It looked like their charm wasn't the only thing to split between
him and Alfred.
Matthew reached the stands and looked around for Gilbert. "Gil? Are you here?"
"Hey, Mattie. I'm over here!" Matthew ventured further into the structure to
find Gilbert taking refuge from the winds under the benches. He was dressed for
the temperatures, complete with earmuffs and gloves. He peaked over his scarf
to smile at him. "Sorry about the weather. I guess it was too much to expect
actual spring weather in March."
"But it's March in Scotland and nothing you could have planned for." Matthew
approached him and saw the thermoses and brooms at his feet. "What did you plan
for?"
"I wanted to take you flying in the day time, so I reserved the pitch for an
hour."
Matthew stared at him, shocked but delighted. "How did you manage that, with so
many games happening?"
"Natalia owed me a favor and moved our practice time at the last minute so no
other team would take it. I have to get changed for practice after the hour,
but I figured it was the best chance I was going to get."
"That's awesome, Gil! I've wanted to try flying when it was light out but,
well…"
"I figured that's why you chose to fly at night. But now there's no one to run
into; it's just us. I, um, I also brought hot chocolate, though it's probably
frozen hot chocolate by now."
"That's what magic's for." Matthew was beaming at him and impulsively hugged
him. Gilbert seemed startled but held him closer after a moment. "Thank you for
this. No one's ever done something like this for me."
"Anytime."
Matthew pulled away before the tension between them got any thicker. He reached
down to pick up a broom and ran away, shouting, "Race you!"
He heard Gilbert laugh and give chase. "Oh, it's on!"
===============================================================================
Matthew ventured to rest his head on Gilbert's shoulder and sighed. They were
sitting side by side under the stands again, hands wrapped around newly warmed-
up hot chocolate and brooms resting to the side. They had flown for a while,
circling around each other and basically just goofing around. It was the most
fun Matthew had had in a while. Still, he was the one to suggest that they sit
down and enjoy the drinks, not wanting their limited time together to pass
without them having a chance to talk to each other. Matthew's knees were pulled
up nearly to his chest while Gilbert was sitting with his legs crossed. Once
Matthew settled against him, Gilbert took one of his hands in his and didn't
let go.
"Tell me something."
"Like what, Gil?"
"I don't know. Anything."
"Um, my favorite color's red? I like polar bears; I think they're really cute
and they're the only bears that will hunt humans."
Gilbert laughed, the action making Matthew's head shake a little. "I never
would have guessed, though I probably should stop being surprised when you tell
me things. You've only ever proved my expectations wrong."
"Really? What exactly did you expect of me?"
"Well, whenever I saw you, you kept to yourself and were constantly working. I
had only seen you with Lovino once or twice and that was the only time I ever
saw you smile. I don't think I had a particular image of who you were, but I
never could have guessed that you were fun and interesting as well as smart and
kind." Matthew turned his face into Gilbert's shoulder to hide his blush and
Gilbert lightly squeezed his hand. "Don't be embarrassed, Mattie."
"It's not like I can help it, Gil."
"I can give you something to be embarrassed about. I've thought of my answer to
your insistence that I'm 'adorkable.'"
Matthew smiled, his face still hidden. "It's true."
"Well, I'm gonna call you Birdie."
Matthew frowned and settled once more against him. "Why?"
"Because birds are awesome like you and your hair reminds me of a baby bird I
found when I was little. Gilbird was my first friend and kept me company until
West was born. He flew away at the constant crying, but that was okay."
"That's more sweet than embarrassing, Gil." Matthew moved a little closer, so
Gilbert's arm was resting on his and his arm as against Gilbert's side.
"You think that now. Just wait. You'll probably blush the first time I call you
that in front of someone else."
Matthew smiled. "Probably, but I damn near blush at everything." He cleared his
throat and took a sip of the warm liquid, wanting to say something to answer
Gilbert's openness with him. "I've actually liked you for a while, even before
this year."
"What, really?" He felt Gilbert turn his head to look at him and Matthew kept
his gaze at their intertwined hands.
"Yeah. In my third year, I was walking to class and someone walked into me,
knocking my books out of my hands. I was used to it by then, so I just bent to
pick up my things. You stopped to help me. Other people had done that before,
but no one acknowledged me like you did when you handed me my books." He felt
Gilbert tense against him, but he kept talking. "You said, 'Watch out, cutie.
Wouldn't want—'"
"—Someone like you to get hurt," Gilbert finished for him softly. It was
Matthew's turn to tense and he moved his head to look at Gilbert. He was
frowning in concentration and Matthew's eyes widened.
"You remember that?" Gilbert and Matthew didn't speak to each other since that
chance encounter until Gilbert had caught him flying at night. Matthew had just
accepted that Gilbert had forgotten he existed like everyone else and that it
was only a moment that lasted a few seconds. He shouldn't have been that
affected, but he was.
"I…I'm not sure. I think so because of that feeling of déjà vu I had the other
day, when you slipped on the ice. It had been bothering me how that could have
been familiar, but now it makes sense."
"Oh." Matthew rested his head once more and said, "It was rare for people to
see me. That was the first time anyone said that they found me even marginally
attractive, let alone someone who looked like you. But you had said it like it
was the most natural thing in the world, winked at me, then left. I know it's
stupid, but I had a crush on you ever since."
"It's not stupid." Gilbert squeezed his hand a little. "I'd been wanting to
talk to you all year but I was too intimidated."
"Youwere intimidated by me?"
"Matthew, you're beautiful. Of course I was."
Matthew inhaled sharply at the statement. He looked up at him to see him
looking back from a short distance. "No one's ever said that. Not about me."
Gilbert frowned at him. "What do you mean?"
Matthew bit his lip and looked away. Then he laughed a little to himself. "Gil,
I'm pretty sure you're to only person who's ever found me attractive. At the
very least, the first person to think that past a handfull of seconds."
He heard the sound of liquid sloshing then felt a gloved hand on his face,
lifting his chin gently. Matthew moved as directed and met Gilbert's troubled
and disbelieving eyes.
"Let me check my understanding. The most beautiful person I've ever seen has
never been kissed?"
Matthew's eyes widened and he licked his lips, absently setting his thermos on
the ground. "No one's ever wanted to before."
Gilbert's eyes darkened and he said, "I do. May I?"
Matthew drew in a shaky breath, nervous for more reason than one, well aware
that his heart was probably beating too fast. Still, he breathed out, "Yes."
"Thank you," he said seriously, his hand moving to lightly rest against his
jaw. His thumb traced Matthew's bottom lip and he automatically parted his
mouth. Gilbert leaned in and—
"BEILSCHMIDT!"
Both of them startled at the shriek of outrage. Gilbert sighed and rested his
forehead against Matthew's long enough to whisper, "I'm so sorry." Then he
lifted his head and Matthew watched his face go from relaxed and kind to angry
and annoyed. "What? I had an hour!"
"And I gave you an hour and fifteen minutes. Favor or not, we have a game this
week." Matthew lifted his head to look behind him to see Natalia Braginski, a
chaser and the captain of the Slytherin team, glaring at them. Her long grey
hair was pulled into a tight bun and her dark eyes shifted to focus on Matthew.
"I take it you're the reason one of my beaters was yelling at half of our house
on Sunday?"
He did what?"Excuse me?"
She huffed out an amused sound and looked at Gilbert again who was notpleased.
"Bring your Hufflepuff out to meet everyone, if he's willing. It's the least
you could do for making us wait in the cold." She strode away from them,
clearly expecting them to follow her orders. Matthew had wondered why they had
elected to make the youngest member of their team the captain, but now he
understood that she was both a good leader and fucking terrifying.
"…Do you want to go meet everyone?"
"Yeah, sure." They gathered their things and Matthew said, "You were yelling at
them over me?"
Gilbert sighed. "Yeah. I was upset that no one seemed to know who you were,
even the fifth years. It didn't help that they ambushed me when I was exhausted
over what happened with the Baron."
"Okay. But, Gil, it's really not their fault they can't remember me."
Gilbert frowned at him. "Then whose fault is it, because it certainly isn't
yours."
Dammit. Matthew had an actual answer to that question now, but he didn't want
to explain much of anything until Gilbert knew more about him other than his
weirdness and he was absolutely sure he was his mate. It was probably a good
thing they were interrupted. "I think I may have been born with it. Or at
least, McGonagall thinks so. It's no one's fault, Gil."
Gilbert pursed his lips. "I hope not, Mattie, because that means there's no
cure for it. I know how much it hurts you to not be remembered. I wouldn't want
to think there's no way to help you."
Wow. I really hope you're my mate. "Thank you, Gil. I really appreciate that."
Matthew bumped into him because his hands were full and smiled at him.
He seemed to blush at the look and they stepped out from the stands. Most of
the players were already flying, but a few were still grounded. Gilbert started
pointing people out to him. "So, these assholes are my teammates. Ivan's the
keeper and a little creepy. He's Natalia's older brother but is more afraid of
her than anyone I know. But he's mostly alright. The chaser up there with
Natalia is Sadik. He and Antonio have quarreled more than once over Lovino,
though I don't think he knows it. He's a good guy for the most part, but he and
Antonio hate each other off the pitch. You know Antonio."
They were approached by someone he recognized as their seeker. "This is my
friend, Francis. He's the worst. Francis, this is Matthew."
Francis pouted at Gilbert, though his blue eyes were too amused for him to even
pass as marginally upset. "Love you, too, Gilbert." His eyes shifted to Matthew
and he stuck out a hand. When Matthew took it with a smile, Francis said to him
in French, "Hello, Matthew. So you're the one that's finally managed to catch
Gilbert. Congratulations."
Matthew raised his eyebrows at him and responded in kind. "Thank you, though I
wouldn't know if he's mine after one date, now would I?"
===============================================================================
Gilbert was torn between being jealous and ridiculously turned on when Matthew
answered Francis is soft, lilting French. He had no idea what was said beyond
their names and basic greetings, and he found that he really wished he did as
Francis started laughing, delighted.
Francis finally dropped Matthew's hand and Gilbert only barely resisted the
urge to step closer to Matthew. "Well, played, Matthew. I'm happy to make your
acquaintance."
"Likewise."
Francis' eyes flashed over to him and Gilbert gave him a look that said, very
clearly, whatever you're thinking of trying, don't. Francis just grinned at him
before flying away. Matthew turned to him with a slight frown on his face.
"That was strange. Does he always greet people in languages he's not expecting
them to know?"
Gilbert shrugged and tried to look unaffected as he stepped just a little
closer to him as they head towards where Alistair was stretching. "Sometimes.
Francis mostly does whatever he wants in the moment. I didn't know you spoke
French."
Matthew blushed lightly and said, "I spent part of my childhood in Quebec and
my parents let me keep learning the language after we moved."
"That's cool. I spent my first nine years in Germany before we moved to
England." They had reached Alistair and his best friend turned to look at them.
His eyes flicked over to Gilbert before they settled on Matthew. To his
surprise, there Alistair looked at him with clear recognition and…interest?
"Ye must be Matthew. Nice ta see ye again." Alistair all but purred at him and
Gilbert immediately stepped closer to Matthew. What the hell?
Matthew paled so fast Gilbert thought he was going to faint for a second.
Shocked and a little horrified, Matthew said, "You remember me?"
"Of course I do. It's nice to put a name ta yer face." He held out his hand and
smiled at him slowly. Matthew took the offered handshake and Alistair cut his
eyes to Gilbert briefly. "I'm his best friend, since he's not gonna introduce
me."
Matthew released Alistair's hand and glanced up at Gilbert expectantly, his
eyes more than a little stunned. Gilbert cleared his throat and said, "Sorry.
Yeah, Alistair's my best friend." Gilbert was looking at Alistair, sending
silent what the fuck signals at him. Alistair just smiled at him as he did
whenever he was going to do something particularly reckless.
Matthew, unaware, cleared his throat and said, "I'm not surprised, with how you
two play together. You were both pretty impressive at Saturday's game."
Alistair's eyes shifted back to Matthew and alarm bells went off in his head.
"Thank ye, Matthew. I'm happy I finally got ta talk to ye, considering all that
I've heard about ye. Gilly was right: ye are gorgeous."
TIME TO GO.Matthew's flush renewed but he didn't look away from Alistair, just
as he hadn't looked away from Gilbert in class. Sounding like a stiff wind
would knock him over, Matthew responded, "I…um, thank you."
Alistair tilted his head slightly as his interest in Matthew clearly increased.
"Scottie—"
"See ye later, Matthew. Gilly, are ye practicin' in those? Good; there's yer
bat." Alistair shot him a look that meant he would explain later and flew off.
"…You have interesting friends, Gil."
"That's one way to put it. You've met Alistair?" He put an arm around Matthew's
shoulders and walked them over to the edge of the pitch. Matthew turned to say
goodbye. "Leave the thermos and broom here; I'll take care of them."
"Thanks and yeah, I ran into him one night when I was sneaking out. We didn't
talk or anything and I'm floored that he even remembered me." Matthew seemed
confused before shaking his head. "I had a great time today. Would you…do you
want to see me again?" Matthew asked shyly, looking at the ground.
"Of course I do. Maybe next time we won't be interrupted." He said lowly,
stepping to Matthew's personal space again.
Matthew bit his lip and looked up at him, bring a hand up to touch Gilbert's
mouth lightly. "I would like that." His gaze shifted to something behind him
and he stepped away quickly, turning red once more. "I'll see you in class."
"Yeah." Matthew left and Gilbert turned around to see half of his team
blatantly staring at him with shit eating grins on their faces and Alistair
giving him a considering look. He glared at them and grabbed his broom and bat.
I hate you all.
===============================================================================
"Hey, maple bastard. How was your date?"
"We have a problem: Alistair remembers me."
"You mean from…? Fuck. Wait, you talked to him?"
"Gilbert introduced us."
"How did that go? You didn't act like you were attracted to him, did you?"
"…Maybe. I-I didn't mean to but I think I did?"
"Did he look like he wanted you back?"
"…Yeah. He…he said I was gorgeous."
"In front of Gilbert?"
"Yeah."
"Shit."
"Well put."
"Then who's your-?"
"Hell if I know."
===============================================================================
Alistair had just started gathering his things to take a shower after practice
when Gilbert walked into their shared room and shut the door. With a glare that
made his crimson eyes intriguingly frightening, he asked, "What the fuck?"
Alistair shrugged at him, guessing he meant his interaction with Matthew. "One,
heis beautiful and I remember exactly what he looks like. Two, don't act like
we've never been with tha same person at once. Three, I wanted ta see how ye
would react. Ye've never been jealous like tha' before, so I'm guessin' yer
serious bout 'em."
"Yeah, I am, but cut the shit, Alistair. I saw the way you looked at him."
Alistair shot Gilbert a glance. Then you saw the way he looked at me, too.
Alistair had been shocked when he watched Gilbert emerge from the stands with
clearly an older version of the boy who had stumbled upon one of his and
Gilbert's outings during their fifth year. When he had opened his eyes that
night at the soft sound of a startled inhale, he hadn't expected the intruder
to stay and watch. Alistair hadn't even been able to tell the gender of the
sudden voyeur, their shoulder-length hair shining what he had thought a color
distorted in the faint moonlight and preventing him from seeing the exact
details of their face. But he had noted the grace they had moved with when they
dropped their hand and what little he could make out of their face hinted at a
stunning appearance. What had made smile invitingly at the person was the
instinctual interest he felt. The person's chin had tilted to reveal an
enticingly parted mouth when Gilbert had bit him where his neck met his
shoulder and he had closed his eyes at the feeling. Alistair had opened his
eyes to find their visitor gone and didn't have enough information to go on to
approach anyone about it.
So how had he known it was Matthew? His hair was still that impossible color
and his mouth was the same shape, sure. But what was most revealing was the way
he moved and his suspicions were confirmed when Matthew paled at the
insinuation. Alistair was always going to be interested in whomever had
inserted themselves into that night, but the fact that Matthew was everything
Gilbert had described made it impossible not to be drawn to him.
But Gilbert was his best friend, the person he was closest to. Alistair would
only admit to himself that he was more than a little in love with him, too. He
had been prepared to be jealous and critical (internally, of course) over the
boy Gilbert had chosen, but Matthew had taken him by surprise. The point was,
Gilbert had Matthew, end of story. Alistair would never betray him like that.
"So? Yer boyfriend's attractive. Sue me."
"No, Alistair, I know that look you had on your face. You want him."
Alistair glared at him, turning bodily towards him. "And ye have him, so he's
off limits. Do ye reallythink I would touch someone who's yers? After
everything we've been through?"
Gilbert looked at him and shook his head. "No, I don't. I'm sorry, I know you
wouldn't do that. I've never been possessive and I'm not sure I like it. Hell,
we haven't even kissed. I just…don't want to share him."
Now that was an idea he could contemplate later, the three of them together.
Being with Matthew and Gilbert, not sharing them, because that would something
different than a hurried fling in a dark alcove. But that would require
something like, oh, Gilbert wanting him back to work. For now…"I didn't ask ye
ta." Alistair sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "On to things tha' don't
make sense, I agree with ye tha' something's not right about folks nae
rememberin' him. I'm not tryin' ta make ye angry, but ye shouldn't forget a guy
like tha' easily." Hell, Alistair hadn't even fully seen him and he didn't
forget about him.
It was Gilbert's turn to sigh as he flopped down onto his bed. "That's what I
thought. Matthew said today that McGonagall thinks he was born with it, but
what kind of curse can be inherited like that? He hates it."
Inherited? What the hell? "Wha' do ye know of his family?"
"Not much. His twin brother is Jones in Gryffindor and I know he spent some
time in Canada as a kid, but that's it. When I asked about the different last
names, he just said his family was complicated."
"Jones? Talk about two opposites...wait, his twin brother? Are they identical?"
"Mattie said so, but I don't really see it. They just look too different to me.
Why do you ask?"
"…Jus' a thought. If they were fraternal twins, then it wouldn't matter. But
since they're identical…I need ta do more research." If they were originally
one, then something that was meant to be whole could have been split between
them, especially since this seems magic-based and that can make muggle science
go a little wonky. Alistair didn't have much interest in Jones outside of
making sure he didn't hurt his brother, but he knew he was relatively popular
by the school's standards. He needed more information about how the twins
interacted with other people before he could even guess at what was happening.
Gilbert seemed to follow his logic as he sat up and looked at him. "You think
it's genetic."
"Maybe, but it's a long shot. Anyway, I'm gonna start talkin' to 'em. Be his
friend, I mean."
Alistair said it partially to see how Gilbert would react, but mostly because
he wanted to know Matthew more. Gilbert didn't disappoint as his eyes darkened
with sudden jealousy and he said, "Matthew? Whoa, no you're not."
Alistair just raised an eyebrow at him before losing his shirt and gathering
his things to take a shower. He felt Gilbert's eyes on him and smirked. He
wouldn't do anything about his friend's automatic interest because he had been
off limits for a while now, but the reaction did wonders for his ego. "I wasn't
askin' yer permission. He's yer boyfriend, but he's still interestin'. An' I'm
one of the few who can remember him; he could use more people ta talk ta than
ye and tha' sour bastard."
Alistair looked over and saw Gilbert trying to reel his jealousy back. "Fine.
But keep your hands to yourself."
Alistair shot him a sly look and he turned to walk out of the room. "I won't
lay a finger on him; I promise."
===============================================================================
"Hey, Matthew. Do ye mind if I talk to ye fer a second?"
Matthew glanced up from his homework, surprised to be addressed when he knew
both Lovino and Gilbert were in class. He rarely saw Alfred, since he was
usually in the first section of any class while Matthew was in the second
(there were too many students in their year to have just one section for core
classes). Alistair was standing on the other side of his table in the great
hall. He had a thermos in his hand and a bag hanging on his shoulder, looking
for all the world like he had just seen Matthew and had stopped to say hello.
It was a rather novel concept for him. He would be delighted if he wasn't so
nervous.
"Oh! Hi, Alistair. Sure. Is something wrong?" Are we going to talk about this?
And by "this," I mean the fact that we obviously share a mutual attraction, the
fact that I'm dating your ex-lover/best friend, and that one very heated moment
we shared a year ago.
Alistair chuckled to himself as he sat down across from him. "Ye seem
surprised. And nervous."
Matthew winced. "Sorry. I guess people just don't talk to me often. What's
going on?"
Alistair considered him carefully before saying, "I wanna talk ta ye about
Gilly. He seems worried about ye but didn't want ye ta ken how worried. And
since I can remember ye…"
"Wait, you know about that?"
Alistair shrugged. "It wasn't hard ta guess, between Gilly yellin' at tha house
fer forgettin' ye and his surprise tha' I didn't."
"Oh." That was concerning. It wasn't like people thought enough about him to
notice his…condition, but it was still alarming that, once someone remembered
him, they could figure it out pretty quickly. "I'm actually surprised, too. Not
many people can remember seeing me."
"He was also pretty pissed bout yesterday but felt bad about it, too. He's
worried he upset ye an', before ye ask, he doesn't know I'm talkin' ta ye."
Matthew slouched and sighed. When they had been leaving charms the day before,
Matthew had been run into by an older Ravenclaw student, lost in thought, who
hadn't seen him. There had been plenty of room in the hallway for him to go
around, but that just didn't register to him. Gilbert had noticed and terrified
to poor kid before Matthew had gotten him to stop. He had been upset and
despondent when he walked away from him to go to class after explaining
heatedly that it wasn't the kid's fault and that he had apologized, which was
more than most people did. Matthew probably should have stayed a little longer,
but had felt on the verge of tears because no one else had this problem and he
had known that Gilbert was only angry for him but there was no one to be angry
with. Gilbert hadn't responded before Matthew had fled, but he did look upset,
almost heartbroken.
"I don't know what to do about that. I know he was just trying to help and is
upset for me but he can't get angry every time someone doesn't see me. It hurts
me, yes, but I've lived with it for almost sixteen years. If I dwelled on it,
that would be all I ever did and I refuse to let it affect my life more than it
already does."
Alistair tilted his head to the side and looked at him like he had done
something interesting before nodding. "Tha' makes sense, but I wanna explain
somethin' ta ye about Gilbert. He doesn't get attached easily and once he cares
about ye, he'll just about fight a war for ye. It happened fast, but he cares
about ye a lot. He's loyal, protective, and just about terrified he screwed up
with ye."
Matthew frowned at him. "What? Why? He was just defending me and I know it. Why
would I want to stop seeing him because of that?"
Alistair smiled at him. "That's wha' I said. I just wanted ta say tha'." He
started standing to leave. "Also, if ye want ta talk ta someone who will
remember ye, feel free ta let me know. Ye shouldn't be isolated because of
this."
Matthew blinked at him in surprise before smiling at him. He was perfectly fine
with ignoring the problem and Alistair was being kinder to him than he
expected. It was nice. "Thank you, Alistair. You have no idea how much I
appreciate that."
He tilted his head down slightly in a movement that was almost a bow.
"Anytime." He turned to leave and Matthew glanced down at the homework that had
been giving him hell for the past hour.
"Wait!" He turned back towards him with a look of surprise. "Do you have a
minute?"
"Aye, what's wrong?" His eyes had a guarded, wary look to them. Looks like
Matthew wasn't the only one not wanting to address the elephant in the room.
Still, he blushed and felt silly for asking but…"I could really use some help
on this transfigurations homework. I understand if you can't but—"
"Let me come around and I'll help ye."
Ten minutes later, Matthew slumped in relief, laughing at himself. "Wow, I feel
stupid. I'm pretty sure I've got it now. Thanks for explaining."
Alistair frowned at him, sitting to his right side just far enough away that
they wouldn't touch on accident. "Yer not stupid. Everyone needs somethin'
explained again at some point and that's a difficult concept. Yer doin' well."
Matthew shot a self-depreciating smile at him before looking down. "Thanks for
that. Transfigurations and defense against the dark arts always give me trouble
for some reason."
"And there's nothing wrong with tha', Matthew. It doesn't make ye dense, only
shows yer brilliant in other ways."
Matthew looked up slowly to meet Alistair's eyes. "I've never—"
"Mattie?"
Matthew froze and thought, very clearly, oh, shit. He closed his eyes for a
brief second before opening them and turning to face forward with a smile to
greet his brother across the table. "Hey, Alfred. What's up?"
His brother looked between him and Alistair very pointedly and narrowed his
eyes at him. "What's up? You tell me. I didn't realize you were friends with
Slytherins."
He heard Alistair start laughing under his breath, probably because he knew
Matthew was more than just friends with them, and Matthew's smile became
strained. "I didn't realize you monitored my social activity."
"We share DNA; of course I do."
"I'll be sure to tell Great Aunt Agnes that the next time you avoid her when
she asks if you've found a nice girlfriend yet."
Alistair started coughing beside him.
Alfred flushed. "See, he's already corrupting you! You're never mean."
Matthew rolled his eyes at him. "You've got to let those stupid stereotypes go.
And I'm always like this when you're being an idiot. Anyway, Alfred, I'm sure
you and Alistair know each other?"
Alfred glared at him while Alistair just grinned back at him, knowing that
being nice would piss him off. "Hey, Alfred. How's me brother doin'? Not still
sulking from tha' game, I hope."
Matthew bit his lip to stop himself from laughing audibly and shot Alistair an
amused glance. Alfred had complained to him more than once about Arthur sulking
and generally being moody, especiallyafter a loss against Slytherin.
"He's fine." Alfred looked between the two of them and then his eyes widened in
horror as they flashed to the homework Alistair had been helping him with.
"Wait, is he your study partner, Mattie?"
Matthew heard Alistair mumble so that only he could hear, "Is tha' what they're
callin' it these days?"
Matthew's smile faded and he glared at his brother. "One, Alistair kindly
agreed to help me out, so please pull that stick out of your ass. Two, that's
none of your business."
"The hell it isn't, especially if I'm right. Have you told mom?"
Matthew was pissed because this was neither the time nor place to bring that
up. Through his teeth, he hissed, "There's nothing to tell and you need to back
the hell off."
They glared at each other and Alistair cleared his throat. "This…seems like a
family thing, so I'll see ye 'round, Matthew."
Matthew pointedly looked away from his brother to a skeptical but curious
Alistair. "Okay. Thanks again for your help. And call me Mattie."
Alistair raised his eyebrows at him but tilted his head in acknowledgement,
eyes flashing with some private thought. "Alright. See ye, Mattie."
Matthew watched Alistair leave until he was sure he was out of earshot before
turning to hiss at his brother, "What the hell is wrong with you? We don't
bring that up in public, especially in front of other people."
Alfred looked only mildly chastised. "Fine, but, seriously, are you dating
Arthur's brother? Do you think he's…ya know?"
Packing his stuff up pointedly, he said, "No, Alistair's not my study partner,
as you put it, but he is one of the few people who can remember me. He's an
acquaintance who may be on his way to becoming my friend, so if you could get
off your high Gryffindor horse, that would be great."
Alfred sighed in relief. "Whew, that's a relief. I mean, of all the Slytherins
to choose from, either him or that other Slytherin beater would definitely be
the worst."
Matthew stared at him, his jaw hanging open. He had just been given all the
justification needed behind not ever telling Alfred about his interest in
Gilbert (or Alistair) and it hurt to feel like he couldn't trust his brother to
support him in this. "Did you not hear 90% of what I just said?"
Alfred waved his hand like he was fanning the topic away. "Yeah, I heard you.
Look, I'm happy that someone else can see you, but I'm not going to pretend
like I'm not ecstatic that the person you're interested in isn't him. I mean,
we can't just be hooking up randomly anymore, Mattie, when someone might
trigger this whole mess."
"I was never the one who messed around, Alfred, because no one ever looked at
me long enough to be interested!"
Alfred froze, realizing too late how hurtful his words were. "Mattie, I'm
sorry. I didn't mean to—"
"You never mean to. Now, if you excuse me, I'll be heading to the library to
regain the productivity I lost when you interrupted us."
Matthew ignored Alfred calling out to him as he stalked away. He had too many
other concerns to deal with his brother's prejudice and carelessness at the
moment, like how he was going to finish his homework and what he was going to
do with Gilbert on their date on Saturday.
===============================================================================
"Hey, Gilly?"
"Yeah?"
"Yer boyfriend's hot when he's angry."
"What the fuck?"
===============================================================================
"Lovi?"
"What, bastard?"
"My brother's an ass."
"The sun is hot. Any other obvious thing you want to add to the conversion?"
"…Alistair's nice."
"…I certainly wasn't expecting that. We need to talk about your understanding
of the word 'obvious.'"
===============================================================================
Gilbert had received a message from Matthew asking to attend that weekend's
Gryffindor—Hufflepuff game with him. It didn't exactly afford the privacy he
was hoping for, but he would take what he could get. Matthew smiled him when
they met at the stairs that fed into the closest Hufflepuff-Slytherin stands,
bag strapped across his body, soothing Gilbert's nerves as to him still being
upset over the other day. As expected, the Hufflepuff section was overflowing,
this being the first weekend of the year with somewhat pleasant temperatures.
Gilbert led him up to the Slytherin side and moved to head up to the top stand.
He was surprised when Matthew pulled him into the nearest bench.
"We're not staying here the whole time, Gil, unless you want to." Gilbert had
shaken his head and settled in to cheer on the honey badgers.
To his surprise, Matthew really got into the game, cheering when Hufflepuff
scored and yelling colorful obscenities at Gryffindor beaters when they
directed a bludger towards his house mates. They had gotten more than a few
shocked looks from the other Slytherins in attendance, but they had quickly
joined in, jeering at their rivals and rooting for Matthew's team. Gilbert had
always been one that preferred participation to spectating, but Matthew made
being in the stands fun, his enthusiasm infectious.
He also seemed particularly pissed at his brother. As much as he hated to think
it, Alistair was right; Matthew was hot when angry
"Booo. What the fuck, Al? Listen to me, ya goddamn oaf, if you hit that bludger
towards Lilli one more fuckin' time, I'm gonna turn all your baseball jerseys
green and silver when we get home just to spite yo' ass. Did you tell mom, eh?
The fuck are you, five? Like hell we're identical. I don't want your genes!"
Almost as if he heard him, Alfred looked towards their section. He was too far
away to tell individual people apart in the stands, but there were only a few
people in yellow mixed in with the green most people around them were wearing.
Matthew saw that, raised his hand, and gave him a one finger salute.
Gilbert was too busy laughing to see what Alfred did in response.
It was a close game, but Matthew still gestured that he wanted to leave about
an hour in, his cheeks red and his eyes still fiery. He calmed considerably the
moment they were out of the stands. "Sorry about that. I was angrier than I
thought at my brother."
Gilbert just laughed. "It's alright. I found it very amusing and you're quite a
sight when riled up like that."
Matthew blushed and lightly bumped into Gilbert. "You say the most embarrassing
things."
"I just call it as I see it." Gilbert took Matthew's hand and they continued
walking back towards the castle. "You mind telling me what he did to make you
so angry? I wanna know so I don't do it; I wouldn't want that wrath directed at
me."
"Not at all. Alistair stopped to talk to me the other day and was helping me
with my homework when Alfred dropped in to protest my choice of company. He has
this thing against Slytherins for some reason. I didn't appreciate his
disapproval and he tried to tell me what to do. Do you remember when I had to
go to McGonagall's office?"
"Thinking back on what we were doing before she interrupted, I would say I do."
Matthew lightly squeezed his hand but pushed on in his rant. "Well, I went to
find you afterwards, telling him that I was going to study with someone. Some
things were implied before I shooed him away, and then he had the nerve to ask
if our mother knew I had a quote unquote 'study partner.' In front of Alistair,
no less. He really did help with my transfiguration homework and luckily found
my brother amusing. Bottom line, Alfred had no right to say that and about a
dozen other things, so I'm a little miffed at him right now."
Clearly. He had mixed feelings about Alfred thinking Matthew and Alistair were
dating from seeing them together, but he trusted his friend to keep his word
and Matthew didn't seem like the type to do something. "Okay, so never tell you
what to do. Got it."
Matthew laughed. "Yeah, that'll do."
They walked together quietly for a bit when Gilbert said, "Where are we going?"
"Nowhere in particular. You said you liked taking walks, so that's what we're
doing. I brought some snacks for if we wanted to sit down somewhere."
Gilbert was touched that Matthew remembered that, though he guessed it did only
happen a couple weeks ago. "Thanks, Birdie. That sounds awesome."
"It would be nice to know what else you liked for, ya know, future dates and
stuff."
"Future dates, huh? You sound pretty confident about that."
"Should I not be?" Matthew looked at him, and the teasing smile he had worn
started to fade with anxiety.
"Well, considering I want to ask you to be my boyfriend, I think you're good."
"Really?" Matthew beamed at him, a little astonished and so happy that Gilbert
was kind of embarrassed and was struck once more with how beautiful Matthew
was.
He mumbled, looking away, "Yeah, you know, make us official and exclusive and
all—umf."
Matthew threw himself into a hug, knocking the air out of Gilbert a little with
a laugh. Gilbert couldn't remember the last time he made someone that
recklessly joyful and he couldn't help smiling at him as he returned the hug.
Matthew then quickly looked further down the path each way and frowned. He
broke away from Gilbert and said, "Follow me."
Then he took off.
Gilbert stood there in shock for a moment as Matthew started jogging down the
path towards the castle. He never turned around to see if Gilbert was following
him, so Gilbert was force to sprint to catch up. "Birdie, wait."
"No." He laughed again, still jogging and holding his bag away from his body.
"Where are we going?"
"It's a surprise."
They had reached the other side of the castle when Matthew slowed to a walk to
catch his breath. They kept walking. Gilbert said, "To answer your earlier
question, I like pretty much every kind of music, German food, and fighting. I
study martial arts when I'm home and my favorite artist changes at least once a
day whenever I have access to the internet. I find it difficult to study
without some background noise and wished like hell tech worked here. Hell, I
would be satisfied if they school was cassette compatible so I could go around
with an outdated Walkman. What do you like?"
"Reading, cooking, and hockey. The fact that I can't watch games during most of
the season kills me every year. My specialty is pancakes and my favorite genre
is urban fantasy, though I'll read anything that holds my interest long enough.
I like watching T.V., too, and watched so much as a kid that, if the
television's on, I can't focus on much else. My favorite Disney movie is 'The
Lion King.'"
"That's a good choice, but 'Mulan' is the way to go. I like reading, too,
though I mostly stick to fiction. I don't mind an occasional military history
book."
"Why am I not surprised?" Matthew grinned at him before taking his hand once
more and hurrying along the edge of the lake. "Biggest pet peeve?"
"Ugh, that's a hard one. Maybe break-downs in communication? It seems like a
lot of life's problems come from people just not saying something, you know?"
"Wow, you're making me feel bad. Mine is when Alfred forgets to shut the fridge
door in the middle of the night and we wake up to sour milk."
They laughed, a little breathless with the pace they were going at. "Don't be.
I'm not exactly a good person. I mostly look out for my own and will place them
above anything or anyone else."
Matthew frowned at him. "That doesn't make you a bad person, Gil. Everyone has
a line where they divide the people they care about from everyone else. If
someone ever said that they would always place the greater good over their
loved ones, they're either lying, love no one but themselves, or is an honest-
to-God saint."
Gilbert stared at him, causing him to stumble as the made their way past the
Forbidden Forest and around the curve of the lake. "Wow. No one's ever put it
like that to me. You're pretty wise for one so young."
Matthew rolled his eyes at him. "I'm eighteen months younger than you, so I'm
not thatyoung. And thanks. I guess I've seen a lot. You'd be surprised what
people will do when they think no one's there."
"No, I wouldn't."
Matthew was still looking at him and Gilbert had to wonder how he was able to
walk without staring at the ground. He was probably using his peripheral
vision, but he was still steady, graceful even. Matthew turned from the lake
shore into the woods. He began to watch his steps, but he never tripped and he
never reached out to steady himself. After walking less than a minute,
shoreline still in view, he stopped by the base of a large tree.
"This should be fine, but just in case…" Matthew pulled out his wand and
pointed it towards the sky, hand not higher than his head. "Nonaudire protego
totalum."
A small bubble started forming around them, outline just visible to the eye a
translucent silver.
"Matthew, what…?"
"It's a sound bubble I've been working on. It only allows sound in, but not
out. I know this is all a bit much and the spell can't last long, but if we
were interrupted again, I would probably do something I would regret." He put
his bag down and walked over to him
Understanding dawned and Gilbert pinned Matthew with a stare he knew was far
from innocent. "All this because-?"
"Is it too much for me to want my boyfriend to kiss me in peace?"
Gilbert smirked and saw Matthew's eyes darken, blue-violet swallowed by black.
"No, it's not."
Gilbert leaned down and kissed him.
===============================================================================
Matthew knew the mechanics of kissing someone in theory. He had read
descriptions of them in countless stories and understood what he was supposed
to be doing.
But none of those books had prepared him for the thrill that shot down his
spine or through his gut the moment Gilbert's lips gently met his. Matthew met
the slight pressure with some of his own, tilting his head up to meet him. His
lips tingled and, overwhelmed at the unexpected feeling, Matthew broke away
from Gilbert a little to breathe unsteadily.
He opened his eyes, which had drifted shut when Gilbert leaned in towards him,
to stare at his boyfriend's mouth before rolling his eyes up to meet Gilbert's.
Matthew bit his lip and watched his eyes darken before taking a deep breath and
kissing him once more. Prepared for the sensation, Matthew relaxed into the
kiss even as his heart raced and his hand moved to rest shakily on Gilbert's
chest.
His lips parted automatically and he gasped when he felt Gilbert lightly suck
on his lower lip. He pressed himself against Gilbert in his excitement and felt
a hand on his lower back keeping him close. A hand threaded through his hair
and he ventured to nip lightly at his boyfriend's mouth, earning a surprised
sound in response that made him smile a little.
Gilbert huffed out a laugh before kissing him harder, mouth moving with more
purpose than before. Matthew made an eager sound and found his other hand on
Gilbert's shoulder, steadying him as did his best to reduce the height
difference between them. When Gilbert tentatively opened his mouth to tease the
part in his lips with his tongue, Matthew reciprocated by widening the part and
returning the more intimate touch. It was slow and careful, but Matthew moaned
softly at the feeling.
It wasn't long before Gilbert broke the kiss and Matthew immediately turned to
rest his forehead on Gilbert's shoulder to catch his breath. His heart was
racing, yes, but he didn't feel any different and, as far as he could tell, his
eyes weren't glowing. Relived that at the very least this activity was safe for
him to pursue, Matthew melted into Gilbert's hold and moved his arms to hug him
around the waist.
"You okay?" Gilbert asked, petting his hair and lightly kissing his temple.
Matthew lifted his head and looked up at him. Gilbert's eyes were serious, but
his cheeks were lightly flushed and his mouth seemed slightly swollen, lips a
dark pink. He didn't react to any sudden change to Matthew's appearance, so he
smiled at him brightly and gave him a quick peck on that pretty mouth. "I'm
brilliant."
Chapter End Notes
     Story title is from The Killers' "Mr. Brightside." "God, I've got to
     be damned because I want it all." (That's a lie. The actual lyric is
     "Gotta, gotta be down," but that's how I heard it for years and it
     honestly fits more).
     Chapter title is from Halsey's "Drive." "Overanalyze again. Would it
     really kill you if we kissed?...All we do is think about the feelings
     that we hide. All we do is sit in silence waiting for a sign."
     Canon mythology on Veela is pretty thin. I had room to wiggle so I
     did a jig.
***** And I'd Give Up Forever *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
"Scottie?"
"Gilly?" Alistair didn't look up from his potions textbook. They had an exam on
Monday and walking into that classroom unprepared and/or tired on a test day
was a good way to both fail and risk killing everyone in the room by throwing
in the wrong ingredient.
"You still want to be friends with Mattie, right?" Okay, that made him look up.
Gilbert stood at the entrance to their room with bright eyes, a flushed face,
and slightly swollen, pink lips. Looks like he finally got to kiss his fifth
year, Alistair thought wryly.
"Aye. Why do ye ask?"
"Well, I apologized to Matthew about what happened with the Ravenclaw kid and
he said he understood, but it didn't solve anything. He's still going to get
run into and ignored every day in the halls and that's not okay. I was
thinking—"
"Dangerous stuff, that," Alistair interjected coolly.
Gilbert rolled his eyes and moved into the room as he kept talking. "—that
maybe I could just walk him to class. Of course, I can't make it to every one
of his classes reasonably but our schedules were different enough that you
could make someof those times. Interested?"
Alistair regarded him carefully, wondering what made him go from being
possessive and jealous to handing him multiple opportunities to get to know
Matthew better. "Does Mattie know yer plannin' on doin' this?"
"I was planning on surprising him," Gilbert said with a grin that faded when he
saw the frankly suspicious look on Alistair's face. "Scottie, I know I was
pretty adamant earlier that you stay away from him, but you were right: he does
deserve more friends. When it comes down to it, I trust both of you and it
would be great if my best friend got along with my boyfriend."
It felt good to have Gilbert reaffirm his trust in him, though Alistair still
thought there was something Gilbert wasn't saying. Yes, he was still attracted
to Matthew, but he also wanted to get to know him. Besides, it wasn't like he
was new to hiding how he really felt about someone; after all, Gilbert still
had no idea. "…When's tha first gap in yer schedules?"
===============================================================================
"Don't tell me he roped you into this, too."
Matthew was torn between exasperation and apprehension when he saw Alistair
waiting outside of his potions class the Monday after his first kiss with
Gilbert. His inquiry was greeted with a steady look and a shrug. "If ye want me
ta leave ye alone, I will. Say tha word and I'll go back ta tha Dungeon."
Did he really want him to go? If Matthew was being perfectly honest with
himself, getting to his classes that morning had been exceptionally easy with
Gilbert glaring at anyone who had almost ran into him in their negligence. And
this would give him the opportunity to become friends with Alistair, someone
who remembered him and was nice. Matthew didn't consider himself particularly
wise, but he knew a really stupid option when he saw one. Still he wanted to
make sure he wasn't actually being coerced into helping/hanging out with him.
"Not at all! I would be grateful for the company. It's just…Gilbert means well
but he's not blackmailing you or anything, is he? I mean, he did help me get to
class this morning but I've also been handling that for five years on my own
and—"
Alistair lifted an eyebrow at him, effectively cutting his rambling off. Thank
God, someone had to,Matthew thought. Alistair then said, "Mattie, we don't know
each other well yet, but ye should know I rarely do things I don't want ta.
Besides, Gilly's not the type ta blackmail."
"Oh, well, in that case, shall we?" Matthew tilted his head in the direction
they needed to be going with a small smile.
Alistair fell into step beside him. Their conversation couldn't have lasted
more than a minute, but already the flow of foot traffic had become more rushed
than Matthew was used to.
He was late, but he didn't particularly care.
===============================================================================
To Matthew's great relief, Lovino had finally started dating Antonio. The new
development meant that his friend was still snappish and spiteful in his daily
interactions, but now he could actually be caught smiling at nothing sometimes.
Not that Matthew would ever point that out; Lovino would become aware that he
was doing it and would stop immediately.
The fact that both of their boyfriends were in Slytherin also meant that their
communal dinner location had shifted almost permanently. The first time it
happened was the weekend after Gilbert and Alistair had commenced their well-
meaning if overbearing scheme to make sure Matthew got to his classes
relatively unharassed by the general population. Of course, they just traded
negligent accostment for premeditated if friendly ones, though Mathew didn't
really mind. It gave him a chance to see Gilbert more often as they were
usually very busy and holding his hand as they walked through the hallways left
Matthew with a lingering feeling of happiness. It also allowed him to grow used
to Alistair's succinct way of speaking and his dry wit, completely at odds with
Gilbert's charming dorkiness. They weren't there after every class, but enough
that some of his classmates actually started looking at him with confused and
envious expressions. Overall, though, the experience was a good one.
Still, Matthew wasn't expecting Lovino to tug his sleeve to the left when they
entered the Great Hall for lunch that Saturday. "Lovi, what—?"
"I may or may not have lost a bet with the tomato bastard—"
"You mean your boyfriend whom you've loved for years now?"
"…Whatever. Anyway, I have to eat lunch with him and his asshole friends now
and like hell if I'm going in alone."
"…Lovi, you realize I'm dating one of those assholes, right?"
"Yet you aren't denying that's what he is. And are you sure it's only one?
'Cause I've been hearing about some really interesting patterns concerning the
scary Kirkland…" Lovino said in a conspiratorial look in his eye at a whisper.
Matthew felt like his reaction was appropriate.
His eyes widened and face flushed as he hissed, "Yes, I'm only dating Gilbert.
The fuck, Lovi?"
When Lovino only wiggled his eyebrows at him suggestively, Matthew shoved him
away lightly. Lovino actually laughed as he said so quietly Matthew almost
couldn't hear, "It's not cheating if everyone's cool with it."
Matthew just stared at him, eyes wide and mouth open. Luckily, he was saved
from responding by Antonio noticing their approach and calling out, "Lovi!
Lovi, over here!"
Lovino grumbled, "I can fuckin' see you, you bastard. Why the fuck else would I
be walking this way?"
Backseat lover that's always under cover…Matthew shook the lyrics out of his
head and smiled in greeting at the four Slytherin boys. "Good morning,
everyone." He got a couple of mumbled acknowledgements, Alistair only just
looking up from the cup of coffee he was hunched over to nod. Gilbert was
similarly out of it but still reached out to pull Matthew beside him. He felt
his expression become sappy as he went willingly. Ignoring Lovino's faint ew,
he said softly, "Hey, Gil."
"Hey, Birdie. You look damn near chipper; it's indecent."
Matthew raised his eyebrows at him as he settled into his seat. "Well, excuse
me for being awake." He turned towards the table to gather his food only to
notice their companions staring at them with a mix of giddy amusement and
disgust. Alistair had even deigned to lift his head to shake it at them,
expression neutral but for a glint of bemusement in his eyes. "What?"
It was Lovino who said, expressing his disbelief, "Birdie?"
Matthew's face heated so quickly he felt light-headed. He looked at Gilbert for
help only to see a shit eating grin on his face. He narrowed his eyes in
betrayal only to smooth his face into a beatific smile. If this is how they
were going to play it, so be it. "And you look adorkable as ever. Did you wake
up and decide you were going to be extra cute today or…?"
Alistair choked on his coffee and Francis howled with laughter. Lovino
continued to look horrified at the exchange and Antonio joined in on teasing
Gilbert for his oh so pretty blush. Gilbert said lowly, "Geez, Mattie. I'll get
you back for that."
Matthew grinned. "I'll wait with baited breath." He kissed Gilbert's cheek and
reached to actually get some food.
He glanced up and caught Alistair staring at them, coffee mug gripped in a
white-knuckled hand. Matthew met Alistair's eyes and frowned quizzically.
Alistair blinked and shook his head with a quirk of his lips before responding
to whatever Antonio was saying. Matthew mentally shrugged, sure that it was
probably nothing.
===============================================================================
It was definitely something.
Probably.
Or, at least, it was nothing Matthew could put his finger on and say ah ha! I
knew it! Well, not that there was anything to know. For sure. Like there were
niggling feeling and suspicions but- shit, this isn't making sense.
The point. Right. Had to answer Lovino.
"Nothing's wrong, I swear! Just me being silly."
"Oh my fucking God, maple bastard if you don't just say it—"
"Okay, shit, okay. Just…have you ever noticed anything strange when we eat with
the large group?" Matthew asked, hedging a little.
Lovino snorted as he sat on his bed facing Matthew, arms crossed and expression
determined. "Other than the fact we voluntarily sit with those idiots every
chance we get? No, not really. Why, have you?"
Matthew slumped and let himself fall onto the pillows behind him. "I guess not.
Do you think…Gilbert likes Alistair? As in, really likes him?"
Lovino lifted his eyebrows and stared at him hard. "Sure, they're close but
they've always been close. Gilbert is ass over tits for you, though. Why, do
you think he's cheating on you? Because I know this curse that would make him—"
"No, nothing like that! Sometimes it just feels like Gilbert…touches Alistair
more than me? I know that they're best friends and all—"
Lovino let out a sharp bark of laughter and Matthew flinched, feeling
ridiculous. Lovino saw this and quickly said, "Sorry, sorry, but really? You
haven't noticed how, whenever you're in the same room with him, potato bastard
all but runs over to you. To be honest, I have no fucking clue when I last saw
you two together and you weren't attached in some way…and now I'm nauseous.
Yuck. Y'all are gross."
Matthew didn't believe him and tried to think back on it…yes, Gilbert tended to
sit close enough to him on the bench that their thighs were touching and maybe
take his hand when they were walking and…okay. Point taken.
Maybe Gilbert was just someone who thrived on touch. That would explain why
Gilbert slept on Alistair's shoulder at the table, how he complained of the
cold and cuddled into Alistair's side until he noticed Matthew's arrival, how
Alistair allowed that to happen when he had a damn near tangible bubble of do
not touch me that applied to everyone else, and how Alistair's face kind of
softened every time Gilbert pressed close and—
"Yeah, you're right. Haha, forget I brought it up."
===============================================================================
"Hey, can I ask you something?"
"Hm?" Alistair looked up from his DATDA essay to look at Matthew across the
table. They were studying together in one of the many study corners around the
castle, through no design of their own. Alistair had been heading to the
library when had seen Matthew studying at one of the tables of the otherwise
abandoned area and sat down. They had been studying silently for about 40
minutes or so when Matthew finally asked his question. "Aye, go ahead. No
guarantee I'll answer, though."
"Oh," Matthew reddened and looked away, discouraged. Shit. "Uh, never mind.
Forget I—"
"Mattie." When Matthew met his eyes again, Alistair smiled a little at him and
said, "What do ye want ta know?"
"It's…you've been walking me to class and we've been eating together for a few
weeks now, but I'm realizing I don't really know much about you…?"
Alistair couldn't help the slight widening of his smile. Matthew was adorable.
"So…ye want to know more about me?" At Matthew's nod, Alistair smirked and
continued, "Well, I'm bright, love dusk and dogs, and lost me virginity at 15.
Anythin' else ye want ta know?"
Matthew's face, having started to return to its normal completion, flared
again. Alistair was meanwhile cringing internally. Fuck, why did I say that?
Only could have made it more awkward if I describedhowI fucked his boyfriend.
What is wrong with me, Iwant Mattie to like me. Why am I like this!?
Matthew narrowed his eyes at him. "You're teasing me."
"Yeah, but I wouldn't lie ta ya either."
"You're an asshole, you know that?"
Alistair shrugged. It's only awkward if I make it awkward so… "It's one of me
best qualities. But, seriously, ye have ta ask me somthin' specific, not just
give me free reign."
"That's fair, I guess. Um…favorite animal?"
"Unicorns." Matthew stared at him. "Don't look at me like that. Fuckin'
majestic creatures, they are."
"I'm not judging. Just not what I was expecting, I guess. There's nothing wrong
with unicorns. I like polar bears."
Alistair raised an eyebrow at that and decided to tease some more. "We live in
a world of dragons and ye like bears?"
"Hey! This is a judgement free zone, mister!" Matthew said, growing flustered
again.
Alistair frowned and had a thought. "Och, the teasin' doesn't bother ye much,
does it? 'Cause I don't want ta make ye uncomfortable. I'm an arse, but I don't
want ta upset ye, not really."
Matthew frowned back at him. "…No? I guess I'm just not used to it."
Alistair nodded. Be that as it may, he was still going to tone it down.
"Alright. Noo, yer questions? And I'll be wanting some info about ye as well. I
don't do one-sided relationships." Okay, that's a slight lie. I have unrequited
love down to a science at this point but that fact is singularly unhelpful to
this conversation.
"Um," Matthew hedged, glancing away with a bitten lip briefly before focusing
once more on him. "I've actually always wondered…why do you and Arthur speak
differently?"
Alistair leaned back and stared at him for a moment. What a question.
When he didn't immediately answer, Matthew rushed to say, "You don't have to
answer! I just…"
"Wondered."
"Yeah. I'm sorry. Uh…favorite color?"
Alistairs mouth twisted into a semblance of a smile and he chuckled
humorlessly. "Green. But I'll answer ye."
"Alistair—"
"Mattie." Alistair raised his brow at him and Matthew looked at him, eyes wide
and concerned. "I'm not upset. Just…let me answer.
"Ma was…" Alistair trailed off and saw Matthew jolt in surprise. He really
hadn't known, which was unsurprising. "She was loving, kind, and good. But she
couldn't trust people easily, didn't know how ta let people in. Yet, she wanted
bairns. She wanted all of us.
"Charlie, he's the auldest. He's in Wales noo, studying muggle science.
Physics, I think. Then came me, Arthur, and finally the twins, Maggie and Ian.
Ma loved us somethin' fierce, did right by us as much as she could even though
she was workin' too much. She worked from home, when she could, left us either
with Gran or her sister, Aina, when she couldn't.
"I was six when tha accident happened. Hit by some drunk on tha road and killed
on impact. Tha twins were only a month auld."
Alistair cleared his throat and Matthew made an abortive move as if to touch
him. He stared at him with wide eyes and asked quietly, "What was her name?"
Alistair couldn't help but smile as he answered. "Morrigan Lindsey Kirkland,
after tha warrior goddess an' our great-gran. She was beautiful and nurturing,
but I truly pity anyone who had ever incurred her wrath. God help tha fool tha'
questioned her havin' five bairns and bein' unwed." He chuckled at the thought
and one of his earliest memories, of his mother with her soft ginger curls,
innocent freckles, and usually kind green eyes brought a busybody from church
low with shame from words alone. God, but he missed her. In that moment, he
ached for her.
Alistair felt his smile fade and Matthew softly said, "I am so sorry. I know
that doesn't help, but I don't know what else to say."
"Nothin' ye can say, Mattie, don't fret over it. Thank ye, though.
"Anyway, after tha' child services came fer us, though Gran fought ta keep us
together. She was too auld, though, ta care fer tha five of us, Charlie bein'
only nine at tha time. She managed to keep us in tha family. Charlie stayed
with Gran in Swansea, tha twins went ta some cousins in Belfast who wanted kids
but couldn't have them. Arthur stayed wit Aunt Aina, who moved to London. And
I…I went ta Ma's brother and his wife in Aberdeen. I was young, but I was
already tha problem child. They weren't sure if anyone else could keep up. We
saw each other at holidays but…"
"You grew up apart."
"Aye, tha' we did. Tha twins start Hogwarts next year. It will be nice ta see
them more. Maggie looks jus' like Ma. Apparently has a worse temper though."
Alistair smiled at the thought and Matthew smiled with him. "What about ye? Ye
an' Alfie have different last names."
"Oh!" Matthew blinked at him and Alistair could practically see wheels turning
in his head. "Yeah. Well, my mom, she can be both surprisingly archaic while
ultra-progressive. For her, at least. When she and my dad met, she refused to
change her last name and wanted Dad to pass on his to one of their children
because apparently he's the last of his family tree? But Mom is a bit older and
carrying both of us at the same time was so hard for her that they both made
the decision not to have more children. So I got Dad's last name and Alfred
acquired Mom's."
Alistair looked at him steadily. "Why did they not just hyphenate it?"
Matthew shrugged. "I don't really know. I don't think Mom was fond of the sound
of Williams-Jones or Jones-Williams, and she can be pretty stubborn when she
wants to be. But eh, I just report the news, I can't always explain it."
Alistair couldn't help smiling at him as he shrugged, blue eyes sparking with
good humor. "Where did ye grow up? Gilly mentioned ye speak French…?"
"We moved around, actually. Lived in Canada for a bit, then L.A. Surprisingly,
I picked up French while Alfred picked up Spanish. We can mostly understand
each other if we speak in the other language, but can only speak either of
them. If you ever see us yelling incoherently at each other in different
languages, you know why."
He chortled. "Has tha' actually happened?"
Matthew grinned at him. "Oh, yeah. So, Alfred has this habit…"
Alistair listened as Matthew got into his story, completely animated. He wasn't
sure if this wasn't a ploy to get his mind off of his long dead mother, but, as
he had to clutch his side laughing later on, he found he didn't much care.
===============================================================================
Gilbert was supposed to be meeting Matthew in one of the less used study
alcoves to practice charms, but he was running late. He had been buried in
studying for a potions exam tomorrow and had lost track of time. He rushed down
the hall, but was startled to hear voices from where Matthew was waiting.
"—honest question!"
"But Mattie," came Alistair's voice, laughing in tone and Gilbert froze, just
out of sight and around the corner. "I've never had anyone ask me tha'."
"You don't have to have a reason. I just wanted to know if there was one,
that's all." Matthew said, a little more subdued and Gilbert found himself
peaking around the bend in the corridor to see them. Matthew was staring at the
wall and Alistair was sitting somewhat close to him, books and parchments
spread on the table before them but mostly in front of Matthew. They were
certainly not touching but…he could also see how Alistair's gaze softened as he
looked at Gilbert's boyfriend and something in his chest seized.
"If I had ta put a reason to it, I guess because it's always there. I like
green because…it's home. It's tha grassy knolls, me house insignia, me mother's
eyes. It's…life." Matthew was staring at him now, swaying just a bit further
into Alistair's space before retreating. Did he already know about his mother?
It had taken Gilbert a year and a half to get that story. What else had
Alistair given him?
Alistair broke the palpable tension between them with an eye roll that Gilbert
knew all too well as a gesture to misdirect from when something hit too close
to home. "Noo tha' ye made me get all philosophical, wha's yer favorite color
an' why?"
Matthew smiled at his best friend and said, "Red, for no reason."
Alistair raised his eyebrows at him. "Fer no reason. Really."
Matthew laughed lightly. "Yes, really! Some things just are, Alistair. Not
everything has to have a reason to exist."
"Yer sure yer certain it has nothin' ta do with tha fact Gilly's eyes are red?"
Matthew blushed and Alistair laughed. "Yeah, I thought so."
Had he forgotten that his hair was red? Violently so? More red than his eyes
were, certainly.
This was ridiculous. A ludicrous train of thought.
The clock chiming the quarter hour brought him back to the fact that he was
basically spying on two people he trusted, and that he was late as hell.
Gilbert clamped down on his suspicions as he made a show of coming around the
corner in a rush. "Birdie! I'm sorry I'm late, I lost track of time. Oh, hey,
Scottie."
Matthew startled but smiled in welcome at him, minutely shifting towards him as
he approached. Alistair smiled as well, though his eyes were more neutral than
friendly. Matthew said, "Hey, Gil. Don't worry about it. I wasn't waiting
long."
Matthew's face was tilted towards him and he didn't resist the familiar urge to
lean down and kiss him in greeting. When he pulled away, Matthew's smile had
widened, brightening his whole face, but Gilbert couldn't help flicking his
eyes over to Alistair. His friend was watching them, his expression blank. He
met Gilbert's gaze and rolled his eyes with a aborted smile. Gilbert focused
back on Matthew as he sat down opposite of him and saw that he was frowning.
"Is something wrong, Gil?"
"Nope! Are you staying for our charms practice, Scottie?"
Alistair scoffed and scooped his bag up as he stood. With a smirk, he said,
"No, I think I'll continue on me way ta tha library, leave ye two ta it. Don't
do anything I wouldn't."
Gilbert couldn't help the sharp bark of laughter at that because he
personallyknew how much that didn't cover. Alistair's eyes sparkled and the
curve of his mouth sharpened knowingly and Gilbert knew they were okay.
"We're really just studying, but see you later." Matthew said, and Gilbert
looked to see him smiling tightly, eyes darting between them once before
focusing on the study materials in front of him.
"Later," Alistair said as he turned and walked away. Gilbert watched him go for
a moment, wondering what had happened, only to realize Matthew was staring at
him.
"Hey, are you okay?" he asked, unable to read the look in Matthew's eyes.
He blinked and smiled at him again. "Just woolgathering. How are you, Gil?"
Matthew reached out to take his hand and Gilbert decided there was no problem
at all.
===============================================================================
Alistair had been feeling restless all day and decided to take a page out of
Gilbert's book and go for a walk. While he could handle the moderate chill
outside, he stuck to the castle's corridors. It was a dangerous thing, not
paying attention to where you were going in Hogwarts, but that was exactly what
he did, mind oscillating between being deliberately blank and that blasted
transfigurations spell that was giving him hell.
He was cursing the homework assignment once more when he turned a corner and
came to a halt, mentally and physically. On one of the larger window ledges,
Matthew was sitting, staring at the outdoors with a troubled look on his face
and his hand curled in front of his mouth. The few other students walking
through the hall passed him unknowingly and, for once, Matthew seemed utterly
unaware of everyone else around him. A brief thought occurred to turn around
and walk away, to either leave him to his thoughts or to fetch a similarly
frustrated Gilbert from where he was still working on their assignment in their
dorm room. It was dismissed almost immediately, his feet already moving them
closer. Trying not to startle him, Alistair said quietly, "Hey, Mattie."
Matthew jolted a little and made a small, adorable noise of surprise as his
eyes flew to him. He relaxed immediately when he saw it was Alistair and that
little detail was a bit too pleasing to notice. "Hey, Alistair. You scared me."
"Sorry bout that. I wasn't tryin' ta."
"No, no, it's fine. I need to be more aware of my surroundings. What's up?"
Alistair raised his eyebrows at him and sat on the opposite end of the ledge,
turned to face Matthew. "Tha's what I was gonna ask ye. Ye look like somethin's
eatin' ye."
Matthew cringed and looked away from him. "I asked you first."
Alistair studied him, trying to get a hint as to what was bothering him from
his expression. When he didn't say anything for a long moment, Matthew glanced
up and met his eyes, the deep, dark blue more cautious than usual. Matthew
looked away first, a touch of color in his cheeks now. God, he's beautiful.
Alistair cleared his throat and said, "I was stuck on a transfig problem an'
went fer a walk. Yer turn."
Matthew shook his head. "It's silly. I have a million other things to be
worrying about right now."
"…But yer worried about this. Just talk ta me. Maybe I can help ye and it can
take me mind off tha' damn assignment." When Matthew only bit his lip and
closed his eyes, something clicked in his mind. Alistair hesitated before
asking carefully, "Is it somethin' about Gilly?"
Matthew opened his eyes in shock at the question before laughing humorlessly
and saying sardonically, "Am I that obvious?"
"Only ta a friend." Matthew stared at him like he had said something surprising
and Alistair's palms itched to touch him as he held his gaze.
After a while, Matthew licked his lips and said, "It's kind of an awkward thing
to talk about, especially with you."
He tilted his head to the side a little. That sentence could mean a lot of
things. "How so?"
Matthew turned red and glanced away as he said, "Because, well, you're his best
friend and his…well, yeah, you're my friend now, too, but you're also the only
other person I—Fuck. No, that's not what I meant to—you know what? Never mind.
It's not important and I really should—" Matthew started to stand and Alistair
reached out a hand to stop him.
"Wait." Matthew stopped before he could make contact with Alistair's hand, but
was so close that Alistair could feel the heat coming off of him. "Wait,
Mattie. Please."
Matthew sat back down and Alistair lowered his hand, but they were closer
together now that they had shifted, a fact neither moved to change. After a
long, tense moment, Matthew said, "Promise not to tell Gil? I already feel
stupid enough as it is without him knowing."
He was starting to get alarmed. "Of course, but yer worryin' me noo. Wha's
wrong?"
"Does Gilbert not want me?" Matthew blurted, flush renewing but eyes anxious.
Alistair just looked at him because the question made absolutely no sense to
him. "Wha'?"
"I mean it's fine if he doesn't," Matthew rambled. "Most people don't but I was
really hoping he did and I thought he did but he doesn't…he doesn't actlike it.
And if he just wasn't interested in doing anything like that, that would be
fine but I know that's not true because he has a reputation and I've seen him
with you. And—"
"Matthew, stop." Matthew closed his mouth with a snap of his teeth coming
together and Alistair parsed what he could from his spiel and came up with, "Ye
don't think he's attracted ta ye."
"I don't know if he is," Matthew confessed quietly. "We've been dating for a
month, Alistair, and he's barely touched me. Tell me I'm wrong and say that's
normal for him."
He couldn't because it wasn't. Gilbert usually jumped head first into getting
as physical as his partner was comfortable and Matthew apparently was aware of
that. This conversation fell very much under the category of things Alistair
thought he would never have to do, but he had a duty to both Gilbert and
Matthew as their friend to say the right thing here. "Mattie, I know he treat's
ye differently than everyone else, but I also know he hasn't felt this way fer
anyone else, either, ever. He's being careful and goin' slow, but he wants ye
somethin' awful."
Matthew looked at him for a long moment as he opened and closed his mouth. He
then glanced away and licked his lips before saying hesitantly, "Can I ask you
to do something for me?"
He doesn't believe me. "Yeah. Wha's it?"
"If…if Gilbert. Well, I know he's your best friend. I get that, really, but if
he…I know you two have been together before and that he still—could you tell me
if something changes? I know I'm not exactly his first ch—" Matthew cut himself
off and cleared his throat, but didn't say anymore.
Slack-jawed and utterly astounded, Alistair said, "Ye think he would
actuallycheat on ye?"
"I think he wants—" Matthew stopped himself once more and just shook his head,
eyes meeting Alistair's for a second before darting away. Too quiet, he said,
"I don't know what to think and a lot of things about this don't make sense to
me. Look at things from my perspective, Alistair. It's not like I'm…I'm going
to stop myself before I make this worse. I should g—"
"He's jealous," Alistair said, blurting the first thing that came to mind to
get Matthew to stay with him long enough for him to make him feel better.
Considering the shit Matthew had to put up with daily because of his
predicament (which Alistair really needed to find the time to look into
further), it wouldn't be a surprise if he had low self-esteem. But this…what he
wasn't saying had the potential to really depressing. It was a miracle Matthew
was saying any of this to him, even if he was stopping himself halfway through
thoughts. If saying this would help, Alistair would give a damned monologue.
It did make Matthew freeze and look at him strangely. "What?"
"He does not act like it around ye, but he's very jealous and doesn't want
anyone else near ye 'cause he's afraid of losin' ye. Gilbert's never been like
tha' with other folks. He not only wants ye, he's claimed ye as his."
Unfathomably, Matthew reacted like he'd been slapped. When Alistair stared at
him in utter confusion and not a little worry, Matthew seemed to panic a little
and he said, laughing nervously and looking at the floor, "Thanks, Alistair,
you really cleared that up! See, I knew I was being an idiot, worrying about
things when he's just being considerate. Ha! I've got to say, though, Gilbert
being jealous seems like wasted energy. I mean, come on, this is me we're
talking about. Who else would even be interested?" Matthew laughed self-
depreciatively. When only heavy silence followed, Matthew seemed to come to a
realization and slowly brought his eyes up to meet Alistair's.
He couldn't deny it and he knew his face spelled his guilt before he spoke.
"Mattie…"
"Oh." Tension stretched between them so thick Alistair felt like he could
hardly breathe. Neither of them moved, but he watched as Matthew's eyes
darkened and his breathing audibly deepened. After an infinite moment, Alistair
closed his eyes and shook his head a little. They needed to stop.
When he opened his eyes, Matthew was looking at him with an expression he
couldn't quite identify. It was searching, yes, but there was clear confusion,
loss, desire, affection, and…something else. Alistair cleared his throat and
turned his head away from him as he stood. He said, voice low and thick, "One,
yer not stupid. We've had tha' conversation. Two, try makin' tha first move or
pushing a bit for more. He's probably too afraid he'll scare ye off. See ye,
Mattie."
He took the first step in the direction he came from when Matthew said, "Wait."
Against his better judgement, he stopped and turned partially back to Matthew
with a blank face. "Thank you," he said with a small nod, the words heavy with
meaning. It was an acknowledgement of what his advice may have cost him, a sign
of gratitude, and an agreement to maintain the status quo. But, above all, it
was a statement that his feelings were requited. Matthew had accidentally
pointed out earlier the elephant that Alistair brought to the room every time
they were together and was now saying that he had a matching one.
Nothing would be done about it; they weren't from the two most loyal houses for
no good reason. So Alistair smiled wryly and tilted his head in a slight bow.
He said, "Of course. Tha's what mates are fer." Then he turned and walked
immediately back to the Slytherin dungeon. His transfiguration's homework was
much preferable to the thought that had settled into his brain the moment
Matthew began to speak plainly.
If he were mine, he would never have to wonder.
===============================================================================
Doing his best to ignore the more troubling parts of that particular
interaction, Matthew took Alistair's advice to heart and plotted (maybe
fantasized) ways to put in in action. He had an opportunity to test it four
days later.
Matthew was between classes on a Tuesday afternoon so he headed to the library
to pick up a list of books to find to find for various assignments for the
week. He turned a corner in the stacks and saw Gilbert reaching up to grab a
text of his own. Almost as if he felt his presence, Gilbert turned his head and
saw him watching, mid-stretch. Gilbert smirked at him as he brought his arm
down and Matthew had an idea. He sent him a smile of his own before turning
away to find the book he had been looking for. It was at the opposite end of
the same row and he acted like he was just going about his business. He glanced
back over to see Gilbert frowning at him, so he shot him a smoldering look and
smirked slowly, his message clear: come and get me.
He probably wouldn't say it out loud, but getting Gilbert to chase (hunt) and
catch (claim) him out of desire had crossed his mind with quite persistent
frequency.
Matthew turned away before he saw Gilbert react, grabbing the book he needed
and walking quickly to find the next one on his list. He knew that section of
the library (charms) like the back of his hand and he knew exactly where to go.
He picked out the book and looked around, Gilbert nowhere to be seen. He would
have thought Gilbert hadn't gotten the message if his heart hadn't started
beating quickly at his absence. Matthew trusted his instincts and moved faster.
He moved to the next aisle to head to the transfigurations section and thought
he saw Gilbert round the opposite corner, though he couldn't be sure. He
grabbed the next book and had to stop himself from sprinting rather than just
walking to the larger area of the library. He set the books down at the table
with his things, knowing he had to get one more book from that section of the
stacks. He took a deep breath and licked his lips nervously before heading back
to the stacks. His heart was beating frantically and he felt the heat of a
flush fill his cheeks. The final book was in the last row of the library before
the restricted section, so he had to walk past all the other rows to get there.
Matthew walked forward at a moderate pace, passing Gilbert leaning casually
against one of the desks about halfway down a row. He would have looked like he
was lost in thought to someone walking past, but Matthew caught the glint in
his eye and the tightness of his smile. He walked faster.
Matthew hurried to the shelf he needed and reached up to get the book, just on
the outskirts of his reach. He felt a sudden heat at his back and Matthew
gasped and shuddered as a hand covered his outstretched arm.
Gilbert had approached him silently and was now crowding him against the
counter before the desk-like shelf. His hand crept up his arm to reach for the
book Matthew had been just barely touching. He said, voice low in his ear, "Let
me get that for you." He easily slid the book out of its place and set it
beside them on the wood.
Matthew glanced behind him only to quickly look forward again and brace his
hands on the shelf. His knees were almost as unsteady as his breathing as he
had never seen that look from Gilbert before. The expression would have almost
been pleasant if his eyes were less dark.
Gilbert's response was to place his hands to either side of him on the desk,
caging Matthew in but not touching him. Matthew was just about ready to choke
on the tension in the air and he turned his head to one side. His breath
hitched when he felt Gilbert lean in to him and say against his neck, "What, no
thank you?"
Even the slightest touch to the region made his mouth fall open and his eyes
close. He both felt and heard Gilbert's low laugh before the lightest of
touches brushed against his racing pulse. Gilbert had finally kissed him.
A harsh gasp that came broke the moment and caused the couple to force their
eyes towards it. A small boy wearing the colors of Gryffindor widened his eyes
as he stared at Gilbert and startled both of them when he all but screamed,
"Vampire!"
Matthew didn't know what nonsense the Gryffindor upperclassmen were telling the
first years about Slytherin to scare them and perpetuate the stereotypes, but
this was a new low. Still, Gilbert all but jumped away from him, the shock on
his face mirrored on Matthew's own.
Mentally cursing the circumstances and aware of the feet rushing towards them,
Matthew looked at his boyfriend and said, "Go. I'll take care of this."
Gilbert looked conflicted but nodded, dashing off around the corner of the row
just as a librarian came into sight. The boy was looking at his neck, obviously
confused, and Matthew settled in to give his usual spiel of Slytherins are not
evil and added neither are vampires for good measure. Some fast talking on his
part as to the origins of the situation got him out of trouble, but it was a
near thing.
Damned Gryffindors. Gotta stick their nose in everything.
===============================================================================
Matthew may have miscalculated…just a little.
Since the Library Incident, Gilbert used the knowledge that his neck was
extremely sensitive to his full advantage. In the days between Incident and
their next date, Gilbert made a point to trail his hand across his back of his
neck when he put an otherwise friendly arm around him. Every time, the action
made Matthew freeze a little. The one time Gilbert had reached over to tuck his
hair behind his ear, his hand had lightly trailed down the side of his neck and
Matthew had forgotten what he was saying mid-sentence. After that, Matthew
glared at him every time his hand reached his shoulder height, but he never
told him to stop. He savored the interactions and privately basked in the more
sensual teasing. It was the confirmation of their relationship that he had been
secretly craving and he was too pleased to have to put an end to it now.
Meanwhile, Lovino had been experiencing an emotional crisis.
Lovino had been increasingly agitated for about a week until, the night before
Matthew's next date with Gilbert, he stormed into their dorm room, visibly
upset. Vash and Nate had taken one look at him and fled. He had been raving
about Antonio being an asshole who couldn't be trusted and how he thought he
was different. When Matthew got him calm enough to explain, Lovino said that he
saw him flirting with a Ravenclaw girl and that he tolerated him calling
everyone and their brother cute, but that was the last straw. He felt like he
wasn't enough to keep Antonio interested in him and Matthew hugged him.
When he reminded his friend that Antonio had been wanting to date him for years
now, Lovino explained his fears that he was only after him because of the
chase. Now that Antonio had him, he was convinced that he wouldn't be
interested anymore. Lovino knew that he loved Antonio and had loved him for a
while now, but had thought anything happening between them would only hurt him.
Matthew could only say that he really thought Antonio loved him, too, that he
was a natural flirt, and this might be a misunderstanding. However, if it
wasn't and Antonio really was cheating on him, Matthew would personally kick
his ass. Matthew had jokingly said, he wouldn't know what hit him!
It had been an awful joke, but it had Lovino laughing a little. When he was
truly upset, Lovino had the tendency to cling to someone he trusted and Matthew
knew the minute he had stormed into the room that he was likely sharing a bed
with him that night. Lovino had fallen asleep against him after crying a bit
longer and Matthew did what he could to get comfortable without jostling him.
It was times like these that Matthew was glad magic existed. Vash and Nate had
come back in not long after Lovino had drifted off and had only looked at them
with mild concern. They had roomed together now for four years; they were used
to platonic bed-sharing between the two friends whenever Lovino had been
visibly upset.
Matthew woke up early the next morning, too warm and uncomfortable. He left to
get ready for the day, considering how he was going to threaten Antonio when
the boy wouldn't remember him. It was only after he came back from his shower
and spied a book on communications spells that he smiled.
He kind of felt bad that he would be waking anyone else in Antonio's room. Then
he looked back over at his friend, face still tearstained from the night before
and thought, fuck it. He pointed his wand and willed his patronus to carry a
message to the Slytherin chaser. It was a spell he had only just mastered with
Professor Flitwick's help, and he couldn't help but feel giddy as he imagined
Antonio's reaction to be awakened by a shrieking full-sized moose.
That done, Matthew set about finishing getting ready and completing any
homework abandoned the night before. He just had to make it through the day
until he and Gilbert met for their date.
===============================================================================
"OI! WAKE UP, YA HOSER! I'VE GOT SOMETHING TO SAY TO YOU!"
Gilbert jolted awake and opened his eyes to see a giant ghostly moose standing
over Antonio's bed, yelling at him. Its massive antlers took up the majority of
the room and he saw Francis and Alistair sit up abruptly. Gilbert knew the
minute Antonio realized that, no, he was not dreaming. There really was a moose
screaming at him. He shrieked and moved to press his back into the headboard.
The moose seemed to sense he fear and bared its teeth at him in a semblance of
a smile. Then it got in his face and opened its mouth once more. "IF
YOUEVERHURT MY FRIEND LIKE THIS AGAIN, I. WILL.END. YOU. YOU BREAK HIM, I BREAK
YOU. DON'T FUCKING FORGET IT."
The patronus disappeared in a puff of smoke and the room was silent for a long
moment, Antonio staring blankly into space. Then Alistair looked at Gilbert and
said, "Mattie doesn't fuck around. I love it." Gilbert shot him a sharp look
but Alistair only grinned at him.
Antonio whimpered. "I don't even know what I did wrong."
Francis slowly shook his head at this turn of events. "Mon ami, I would figure
it out fast."
"Yeah, Tonio," Gilbert said, eyes wide. He was very intimidated and a little
turned on. "Either figure it out or be prepared to grovel."
Alistair smirked at him. "Gilly, don't ye have a date tonight?"
Francis looked at him and snickered. He couldn't remember Matthew, exactly, but
he had a vague idea. "That's either going to go very well or very badly."
"Shit. Tonio, fix this before my date tonight."
"What the fuck, guys?! A little compassion would be nice!"
"Dude, for my Mattie to send you something like this, Lovino has to be
absolutely devastated and you're one of the two or three people that can do
that in the entire goddamn castle. You fucked up."
Antonio's face clouded at that. "I don't want to hurt him. That's the last
thing I want."
"Then think, Tonio. Think hard."
===============================================================================
Matthew had been wracking his brain, trying to come up with a good spot for a
date and realized that they only place they would have guaranteed privacy was
outside. So he had asked Gilbert to once more meet him at the Quidditch pitch
under the stands. He set up a little camp at the far end of the stands, as far
from the castle and any possible watchers as possible. The night was a little
warm for him, so probably reasonable for Gilbert. Still, he took out his
smallest wizarding luggage item with a limited undetectable extension charm on
it (designed to look like a backpack), and packed a blanket charmed to be
incredibly comfortable, two thermoses with tea, a variety of sweets, and a
spare cloak. As it was, he was laying on the blanket, eyes closed and ears
keen, with his cloak thrown over the lantern to limit its range and the
thermoses and snacks waiting on the side. His wand was at his side and relaxed
as he waited.
Matthew hadn't really planned much for their date other than just hanging out
with each other in private, without the same possibility of interruptions.
While he had never been caught seeking out, he was prepared to perform his
sound protection spell in an instant, though he hoped not to need to use it. It
really was draining, though he had worked up his endurance to the point that he
thinks he could make it last at full strength for forty-five minutes without
passing out. Lovino had shaken his head at him when he mentioned this, though
he didn't say anything against it; it really was useful.
As for what happened between him and Antonio, Lovino seemed like he had been
trying brush it off that morning. Matthew had informed him of the message he
had sent earlier and told him to be expecting an apology from him or at least
an explanation. He had made noises about that being unnecessary and
embarrassing, but Matthew could tell he appreciated the solidarity. Apparently,
it had worked, since Antonio had been waiting outside the Great Hall for them
and steered Lovino off to talk to him privately. He had nodded at Matthew,
which was a surprise. Then again, he had to have an idea as to who had sent him
the wake-up call. Even if he didn't know exactly who he was, Antonio understood
his role in Lovino's life and that was good enough for him. He ran into Lovino
at lunch and was happy to note that things had improved, though his friend kept
referring to Antonio with an affectionate "stupid bastard."
Matthew heard light footsteps approaching from under the stands and sat up to
see Gilbert approaching him with a smile. He was dressed casually in a zip-up
hoodie, black t-shirt, and jeans and Matthew was happy that he had chosen a
similar outfit. He greeted him with a soft, "Hey, Birdie."
"Hi, Gil." Gilbert sat beside him and leaned in to kiss him briefly. "Happy you
made it."
"Of course. What's all this?"
Matthew shrugged. "I just thought we could take some time to hang out together.
It's not like we can go to the movies or watch Netflix like normal people do on
dates, so I made do."
Gilbert's smile widened. "Sounds great."
An hour later found them lying on the blanket, Gilbert's head resting on
Matthew's stomach and Matthew absently running a hand through his hair. They
had been talking about whatever came to mind: classes, life during breaks, etc.
Gilbert mentioned how he had found Matthew's message to Antonio hilarious, to
which Matthew responded that he was glad it was as great as he imagined.
They had been lying in comfortable, content quiet for a few minutes when
Gilbert said, "Tell me something."
"Like what?"
"I don't know. Anything."
Matthew made a light sound of acknowledgement then bit his lip before saying,
"I want to be a healer, but I don't think I'll make the scores I need." He felt
Gilbert turn his head a little to look up at him, but he kept staring into the
rafters above them.
"I wanted to be an Auror, but I didn't pass the charms exam. I'm still
disappointed, but there are other options. Repeating charms let me meet you and
I can still become a hit wizard as long as I pass the charms O.W.L. I think you
can get the scores you need, I really do, but it won't be the end of the world
if you don't."
"Thanks and I know. I have other options, like becoming a nurse or medic. Of
course, obliviator is always an option with me. I'm particularly suited for the
job," he joked lightly.
Gilbert apparently didn't find it funny. He sat up and stared at Matthew with a
troubled, but compassionate, frown. "Mattie, I wish you didn't have to live
like that. Seriously, is there nothing I can do to help you?"
Matthew smiled at him sadly and sat up, too, turning to face him. He put a
light hand to Gilbert's face and said, "There's nothing anyone can do to change
this, Gilbert. I'm almost entirely sure of that. As for helping, you already
do. You see me and never forget about me. You care enough to ask me that
question. That's all I need from you, angel."
Gilbert smiled at him and it was soft and caring if a little confused. "Angel?"
Matthew dropped his hand and looked away, blushing. The pet name had just
popped out of his mouth without his permission, but he didn't want to take it
back all the same. "Well, adorkable doesn't exactly roll off the tongue."
"Hey." Matthew looked over to see Gilbert tilting his head down, trying to meet
his eyes even as he was turned away. They both straightened and he said, "I
like it, though I don't understand it."
"It fits."
Gilbert huffed amusedly. "I just told you that I want to become a hit wizard
and you call me an angel?"
"An avenging angel is still an angel, Gil. You're not a bad person for wanting
to be our world's equivalent of a soldier. You're not a bad person at all."
Gilbert smiled crookedly at him in disbelief before saying, "You're so kind.
You know, you were the first person to think my retaking charms was a good
thing? Nearly everyone mocked me for it or thought it was a waste of time.
Alistair didn't really say anything about it, just kind of accepted it, helped
me through it, and moved on. But you talked about it like it was a good thing,
like I had made the right decision. And now with your help I think I'm going to
actually pass the exam. I probably don't say this enough, but I really do
appreciate it."
Matthew stared at him for a moment and then, before he lost the nerve, said,
"You want to know what I almost told you that day in charms class? When you
suggested we start with incendio?"
"Yeah, actually. I do."
He took a deep breath and said, "Before my internal filter kicked in, I was
going to say, 'let's see if you can make something other than my blood burn.'"
Gilbert only stared at him for a beat of silence before leaning over to kiss
him soundly. Matthew gave as good as he got then decided to stop waiting for
him to make a move. He broke away abruptly and reached for his wand, creating a
sound barrier around them in an instant. Seeing Gilbert raise an eyebrow at
him, amused, Matthew dropped his wand, took off his glasses, and said quite
seriously, "Unless you don't want to, we are going to do more than kiss each
other and I think we've already established I don't know how to control the
sounds I make with you."
"Oh, I want to." Gilbert was on him in an instant, kissing him. Matthew pulled
as Gilbert pushed and they ended up lying down again, this time with Gilbert on
top of him. He gasped at the feeling and ran a hand through his hair. Gilbert
touched him along his side, heading down past his hips to grip his thigh.
Matthew made a sound of approval which Gilbert swallowed with a slight groan.
He tried to place a hand on Gilbert's back, only to get caught on his hoodie.
Matthew made a noise of frustration and started to push the garment down
Gilbert's shoulders without breaking the kiss. When Gilbert laughed lightly
into his mouth as he took the sweatshirt off with ease, Matthew bit his lip
harder than usual before licking at it. Gilbert stopped laughing.
Matthew traced Gilbert's back, learning the shape and feel of it over his
shirt, and shifted impatiently when Gilbert gripped his hip. He realized
distantly that he needed to actually breathe for a moment and turned his head
away, gasping for air. Gilbert apparently took this as a sign to start kissing
along his jaw, whispering a soft, "Fuck, Mattie."
Matthew's only response was to make a high whine when Gilbert began taking
advantage of his knowledge of his body and began moving down the side of his
neck. His hand started skimming along the skin above his jeans. He inched his
hand upwards, bringing Matthew's shirt with it.
"This okay?" Gilbert stopped kissing him long enough to ask the question and
shifted so he could see his face fully. Matthew looked back at him, taking in
his dark eyes and the way the muted light highlighted how handsome he was,
hinting at the masculinity his face would display within a few years.
Matthew nodded quickly, arching his back a little. He moved his hands to the
bottom of Gilbert's shirt and shifted the fabric so he could touch him as well.
"Can I—?"
"Yeah." Gilbert kissed his lips again before pulling and back and saying,
"Actually, would you be okay if we just lost our shirts altogether?"
Matthew inhaled sharply, trepidation flooding him. He certainly wanted to see
and feel Gilbert shirtless, but he didn't exactly play a sport or do anything
other than grow upwards. He was bordering on the line of being too skinny and
knew it. "Um, I—"
"It's okay to say no, Liebling," Gilbert said, kissing his cheek and hovering
over him. "I don't want you to feel like you have to do anything. Tell me to
stop and I'll stop."
"Gil," Matthew said, waiting until the other met his eyes from a short distance
away. "I want this." He leaned in to kiss him, hands making quick work of his
sweatshirt.
Matthew pushed Gilbert back to sit up and took a deep breath. On the exhale he
pulled his shirt off, baring himself to his boyfriend for the first time.
Desperately ignoring the part of him that was fully expecting Gilbert to be
repulsed by him, he met crimson eyes and said, "I want you."
Gilbert's eyes visibly darkened and he wasted no time kneeling over him and
pulling his shirt off now that he had permission. Matthew drank in the sight of
Gilbert's torso, lean but obviously strong from Quidditch practice. A thought
occurred, I can touch him. So he did.
Gilbert was already on his way back down to kiss him when Matthew reached for
him. As they kissed, Matthew happily sucked lightly on Gilbert's tongue,
causing him to make a startled noise of pleasure and press their naked torsos
against each other. Gilbert gasped at the feeling and Matthew made an excited
and rather embarrassing eager sound into Gilbert's mouth. He let his knees part
to allow Gilbert to press them closer together and ran his hands up his back,
learning how his muscles moved beneath his skin.
Gilbert pulled away just far enough to stare down him. Matthew could almost
feelhis eyes moving over him and he couldn't prevent the squirm of discomfort.
Gilbert frowned at him and moved a hand to cup his cheek, thumb sliding over
his bottom lip. "You okay, gorgeous?"
Matthew blinked up at him and saw the concern beginning to hedge out the desire
in his eyes. That wasn't what he wanted, not right this second. He appreciated
the care Gilbert was showing, but he had been wanting to climb the boy like a
tree for weeks by that point. Enough was enough. Matthew wasn't going to let
his insecurities prevent him from having this. "Yeah, I'm okay." To make his
point, he nipped at Gilbert's thumb playfully and smiled.
The worry melted away and Matthew's smile twisted into a smirk. "Good. God, the
things I want to do to you…" Gilbert's hand drifted from his face along the
side of his neck and Matthew lifted his chin a little in surrender. The gesture
made Gilbert's expression turn almost feral with lust and his hand to tighten
if only for a second around his neck before quickly moving to pet down his
front. His hand continued downward, moving to trace along his ribs and down his
side. A thrill had shot down Matthew's spine and caused him to arch into the
caress well before Gilbert had reached his hips and the waistband of his jeans.
Gilbert's look turned considering and Matthew realized that his hands had
clawed into his back at the same time his hand involuntarily tightened around
his neck.
Oh, fuck, Matthew thought. He relaxed his hands and licked his lips. "Like
what?" His voice was rougher than he had ever heard it.
"Let me think about what I want first…," Gilbert kissed him and pressed close
again, his hips cradled between Matthew's thighs. When Matthew started making
those eager sounds again, he kissed his way from his mouth down to his neck. In
his ear he murmured. "Hmm, I know. Can I mark you?"
Matthew inhaled sharply at the suggestion. "Yes. Please." Mark me as yours. He
bared his neck to his boyfriend and reveled at the ability to touch him more.
Gilbert seemed to be kissing around his neck with purpose, the hand that wasn't
holding him up coming to rest at the skin of Matthew's lower back to keep them
close, as if emphasizing to Matthew their shared arousal. Still, the action
forced a small sound from his throat and his breathing to devolve to panting.
Then Gilbert kissed a spot on his neck that was along his pulse and Matthew
jolted against him, the surprise making his cry soundless. He distantly thought
that he should stop him, but he didn't care at that point. Matthew felt
Gilbert's smirk against him before he began sucking a mark into his skin.
All it took was one heartbeat. One heartbeat where time seemed to freeze for a
moment and Matthew had the very clear thought of, oh, shit, I fucked up. One
instant with Gilbert's lips on his skin and their bodies pressed together for
Matthew to feel in the core of his being that Gilbert was his. One moment where
rationality and instinct fought and the most fundamental feelings won.
The infinite second passed and Matthew cried out. The pressure hurt but in the
best way and he removed one hand from Gilbert's back to thread his fingers
through his hair to keep his head exactly where it was. He opened his eyes wide
and felt a sensation similar to when one stared at something to long. He
blinked rapidly, his vision sharpening before his eyes fluttered shut at the
combined sensation of Gilbert's hand splayed on his ribs, his teeth against his
throat, and their arousals moving against each other. His mate was rutting
against him and Matthew was just lying there?
That had to change immediately.
Gilbert pulled back to admire his handiwork and Matthew pulled him up to kiss
him once more. Even as out of control as he was, Matthew had the self-
preservation to keep his eyes closed. His mate did not know what he was and, if
he found out now, might stop what he was doing, might stop touching him, and
that was the last thing he wanted.
Still, he wanted more. Matthew extended one leg to wrap a foot around Gilbert's
ankle then planed the other on the blanket and pivoted. In an instant, he was
on top of him and he swallowed Gilbert's surprised sound greedily. Yes, give me
more.
Matthew rolled their hips together like he knew what he was doing and shifted
his mouth to Gilbert's ear. He purred as his hands moved down Gilbert's body,
"Touch me, angel."
Gilbert groaned at the sound and gripped Matthew's hips with both hands. "Shit,
Matthew. Are you sure?"
Of course he was. Gilbert was his mate. Matthew knew he would have hesitated a
little before he knew this, but the answer still would have been the same. He
had wanted this from the moment Gilbert's lips touched his for the first time.
"Please?"
Gilbert made a small sound as he gave up trying to control himself. He then
moved one had to squeeze his ass while the other snaked up his front to tease
and explore. Matthew moaned into his ear and moved against him. Then he asked,
"Mark you?" Claim you?
"Fuck, yeah."
Matthew didn't have his fangs, not yet, so he wouldn't bite him hard. But he
quickly located a sensitive spot along Gilbert's collarbone to suck a mark into
his skin. It wouldn't be as visible as he wanted, but it would give his mate
the most pleasure. Matthew was distantly aware that he kept making small sounds
voicing his own enjoyment, but he was almost entirely focused on Gilbert and
the sounds he made as Matthew bruised his skin.
When he was done, he allowed himself to briefly open his eyes to see the mark
he made that his mate would wear and had asked for. He knew Gilbert wouldn't be
able to see his eyes, but he saw a soft blue light on flushed skin. He
whispered lightly against him, "Mate."
Then he gripped his hair tight and moved closer to his ear to hiss, "Mine."
Gilbert gasped at the word and Matthew slit his eyes open to risk looking at
his mate's face. Gilbert's eyes were closed but his mouth was open and bright
red. His cheeks were flushed and his face was slack with pleasure. Matthew
closed his eyes again to hide them, and moved to speak against Gilbert's mouth,
"Beautiful."
"Matthew, I'm—"
"Me, too. Please, Gil?"
Gilbert put a hand in Matthew's hair and flipped them over. Matthew arched
against him, clawed into his back, and felt everything his mate offered him. He
threw his head back and felt Gilbert say against his throat, "Come, Matthew."
Matthew shouted Gilbert's name, eyes flying open before fluttering closed. He
felt Gilbert tense against him as he shook and heard him groan his pleasure
against his skin.
After a long moment of Matthew desperately wishing he could able to open his
eyes but too afraid to, Gilbert kissed him slowly. It felt a lot like coming
home.
Gilbert rolled to the side of him and Matthew immediately followed the
movement, settling onto Gilbert's chest with his face turned away. Gilbert's
hand came to rest on his back and they just laid there, breathing for a few
minutes. Matthew started to drift off when Gilbert said, "Take down the charm,
Liebling."
"'Kay." Matthew squinted his eyes to find his wand and dissolve the spell. He
was pretty surprised it held through his thorough distraction, but he wasn't
complaining. Then he went right back to his previous spot. His heartrate had
slowed drastically, so he hoped that his eyes would go back to normal soon. He
smiled from where he lay, happy despite the increasingly uncomfortable
situation in his pants. He would fix it, but only if his eyes were normal.
Matthew put a hand over his face like he was tired, but he was really checking
to see if his eyes had gone back to normal. To his relief, they had. The
thought of running from here to the hospital wing, leaving Gilbert abruptly
with no explanation after what had just happened, sounded like a special kind
of hell.
Matthew sat up and looked at Gilbert, praying that he had been right. His
boyfriend had been lying with his eyes closed face relaxed if a little pleased.
He opened his eyes and smiled at him, no sign of alarm. "You okay?"
Tension and fear drained from him and he smiled in relief. I am now. "I'm good.
A little sticky, but I was about to fix that. You?"
Gilbert smirked at him. "I'm awesome, though I could use a quick cleaning
spell, too."
Matthew turned away to mutter the incantation, blushing as he did but it was
necessary. He heard Gilbert move to find his wand and do the same and Matthew
started to stand. A sharp pain caused him to make a surprised hurt sound that
brought Gilbert to his side almost immediately. He helped Matthew up and looked
at him, concerned. "What's wrong?"
Matthew's blush brightened and he lowered his eyes. "Nothing. I, uh. I'm a
little sore."
Gilbert cursed under his breath and drew him into a hug. "I'm sorry, Birdie. I
should have slowed down to make you more comfortable."
Matthew couldn't help but to bark out a startled laugh. When Gilbert tensed,
Matthew hugged him back and looked up at him with a teasing smile. "Gil, when
did I ever give you the chance?"
Gilbert blinked at the question before smirking once more and bringing a hand
to Matthew's face. "You didn't, I guess." His hand followed a slow path to the
mark on Matthew's neck and lightly rubbed at it. "That's going to be a bitch to
hide."
"I know, but I'm happy to have it." He stretched to chastely kiss him before
pulling away to find his clothes. Now that he wasn't consumed with the need to
touch him, Matthew found that he wasn't too eager to start testing what point
of intimacy changed his eyes. There was going to be a learning curve to
controlling himself and he didn't want to push it to far too fast. He didn't
regret a thing they did, not in the slightest, but he was aware how close he
had been to giving Gilbert a very bad scare. He was going to need to explain
things soon, but Matthew needed time to adjust to and process the information.
Matthew got dressed and started packing the now empty canisters and a few food
wrappers. Gilbert threw his clothes back on quickly and folded the blanket
before handing it to him. Matthew turned off the lantern and let it cool as
their eyes adjusted to the darkness and the cloak was put away. They were
quiet, though it didn't take long for Gilbert to once again begin to maintain a
light, steady contact with him. After everything was packed away and they were
completely put together again, Gilbert hugged him from behind and said, "Thanks
for the date, Liebling."
Matthew made a soft sound and turned his head to kiss him. When Gilbert
deepened the kiss, Matthew became short of breath and felt a slight burning at
his eyes. It felt like he was tearing up, but he knew that was the farthest
thing from happening. Matthew immediately broke away with a gasp, even going so
far as to pull out of his embrace. He worked to steady his breathing and lower
his heartrate and the burning disappeared. Matthew put a hand in front of his
eyes. There was no light, but still. Fuckity fuck, fuck, fuck.
He had calmed but a low hum of near panic was just beneath the surface. Shit,
if he couldn't share a French kiss with Gilbert, and a fairly innocent one
considering what they had just done, without losing it, he was screwed.
"Matthew?" He froze and turned to look towards Gilbert. He could barely see him
but he looked hurt and sounded concerned. Shit.
Matthew reached to take his hand and scooped up the backpack with the other.
There was no way he could explain why he had just torn out of his arms when he
had been literally begging to be under him not twenty minutes prior without
outright lying or freaking him out. So he ignored it. He smiled wide enough so
Gilbert would see it in the dark and said, "Ready to go?"
"Yeah. Is everything okay?"
"Of course." Matthew gave him a light kiss, pulling away before he could react.
"Come on, it's getting really late."
Gilbert followed, not saying anything in response and Matthew cursed himself.
They stuck to the shadows as much as possible, footsteps silent from one of
Matthew's charms, as they made their way back to the castle. Matthew cleared
his throat and asked hesitantly, "What does that mean? What you called me."
Some tension seemed to slip from Gilbert and his hand lightly squeezed
Matthew's. "It's a German word for 'darling.'"
"Oh." Matthew thought to himself, I am going to find a way to explain this to
you soon. I promise.
But, honestly, what could he say? Hi, I'm half Veela and you're my mate.
Surprise! That wasn't going to work. Maybe he should just explain the Veela
part first? He had until his birthday in July to come up with a way to explain
that fate had made them for each other. Kind of. At the very least, the
universe had made Matthew for Gilbert.
They made their way into the castle, backpack in hand and careful of any
roaming guards, though Matthew thought it was close to two in the morning.
There shouldn't be many people about. Their journey was uninterrupted,
something Matthew would be eternally thankful for. With how little control he
had, he was afraid than anyone who came across them or even startled him when
Gilbert was near would be seen as a threat and would cause his eyes to change
color. He needed to talk to Lovino about this immediately; he was going to need
a spotter to get around for the first couple days if this was how on edge he
was around Gilbert.
What about Alistair? Matthew physically shook his head at the thought, willing
it away. He had his mate, the one person he was made for. Why would he still be
attracted to Alistair? He told himself that losing all possibility of a
romantic future with Alistair didn't bother him. He would keep telling himself
that until it was true.
When they reached the tapestry that hid the passageway to the Slytherin
Dungeon, Matthew turned to Gilbert abruptly and kissed him hard, not wanting
him to think he had done something wrong. He broke the kiss just as suddenly
and said against his mouth, "Good night, angel."
He turned to leave but Gilbert caught him, gently but firmly, around his waist
and pulled his back against him. "Matthew, wait. Are you sure you're okay? Is
there anything I did that hurt you?"
Matthew squeezed his eyes shut and allowed himself to melt into the touch, just
for a moment. "No, Gil, I'm fine. You didn't do anything wrong, okay?"
Gilbert held him closer and Matthew knew then that Gilbert knew he was at least
partially lying. "Then why does it feel like you're running away from me?"
Because I am, at least for the night. "I'm not. You'll see me tomorrow, just
like always."
Gilbert held on to him a moment longer before kissing his temple and letting
him go. "Alright. Sleep well."
"Toi aussi, mon âme soeur." Matthew whispered rapidly before walking away. Once
he knew he was out of Gilbert's possible field of vision, he ran, not caring if
he was caught at that point.
He made it back to the Hufflepuff Basement in record time and didn't stop
running until he reached his sleeping friend. It was never a good idea to try
and wake Lovino up, but this was an emergency.
Matthew shook him gently and said, "Lovi, please wake up. Come on, Lovino."
Lovino jerked awake with startled, "Chigi! What, bastard?"
Matthew looked at him pleadingly and said, "Lovi, it's him."
Lovino shook his head and stared at him, uncomprehending for a second. Matthew
turned his head to the side so Lovino could see his neck and his friend
immediately started climbing out of bed. They headed into the empty common room
and his friend rounded on him. "You're sure? Like, 100%, no take-backs sure?"
"Look at me for a second." Matthew closed his eyes and deliberately recalled
what being with Gilbert, under him, on top of him felt like. His breath
hitched, his eyes burned, and he opened them.
Lovino gasped and Matthew took a moment to look around him, noting that the
room seemed blurry. He removed his glasses and everything came into focus. The
space was clearly visible, even in the dark and Matthew looked over to the lone
mirror in the room. He tilted his head in fascination at the sight of his eyes,
a cold, light blue bisected with a vertical black ellipsis. His iris seemed
larger than usual, though his eyes didn't increase in size. He vaguely thought
they were a strange cross between a bird's and a snake's eyes before he met
Lovino's gaze in the mirror.
"This is about as much as I can control it. But if Gilbert touches me a certain
way or kisses me for too long, I feel my eyes burn and have to get away from
him. I'm afraid that if someone made even the vaguest threat against him, this
will happen. Hell, a thought is what made my eyes change just now. I can
control my emotions well enough, but I have no defenses when it comes to him. I
need help."
Lovino closed his eyes and shook his head for a second. Then he opened them
and, fiercely determined, said, "What do you need me to do?"
===============================================================================
"Feckin' hell, Gilly! I guess I know how yer date was last night."
Gilbert frowned and paused in the process of getting dressed. He hadn't slept
for long or well, so he was a little out of it. He turned around, shirt still
in hand, to see Alistair staring at him from the door to their room. Francis
and Antonio had already been up and dressed by the time Gilbert had managed to
force himself out of bed and had left to eat. Alistair almost always got up
later than him, despising getting out of bed every morning, and had just come
back in from his shower.
"What are you talking about?" Gilbert pulled his undershirt on and reached for
his dress shirt.
Alistair, still half naked and standing in the doorway, gave him a deadpan
look. "Yer joking, yeah?"
"No, seriously. What is it?"
Alistair raised his eyebrows at him and moved to get dressed. "Yer tellin' me
ye don't feel tha lines on yer back? And ye forgot 'bout tha mark on yer
clavicle?"
Oh, right. A ghost of a smirk crossed his face, but his heart wasn't in it.
"Yeah, actually, I did. While that was fun—"
"Whoa, whoa, wait. Ye had Matthew under ye and ye start by sayin' while that
was fun?"
Gilbert glared at him. "It's not like we fucked, Scottie. We just messed around
a little. But—"
"Ye don't get marks like those from messin' around." Alistair glared at him for
a second, almost as if he was angry, before blanking his face and turned to get
start getting dressed. Gilbert didn't know what to do with it, his emotions
already confused enough as it was, so he ignored it.
"—But, I'm more concerned with how he acted afterwards. He seemed, I don't
know. Off? Like something was really bothering him and that he wanted to get
away from me as soon as possible but also not? It was weird. He said he was
fine but he was obviously lying. He had been happy, I thought, but he didn't…It
felt like he didn't want to look at me. I know I'm probably overthinking this
but I know something's wrong." He sat down heavily on his bed, tie hanging
undone from his neck. Gilbert ran a hand through his hair and told himself to
keep moving, but a thought nagged at him: if Matthew hadn't wanted to look at
him, then was it because he wanted to be looking at Alistair? Matthew never had
given Gilbert a reason to think he didn't want him and actively took steps to
make sure he knew Matthew was his, but, deep down, did he want Alistair more?
Alistair was quiet for a minute, enough time for Gilbert to finish getting
dressed and be halfway through packing his things for the day. Maybe he was
having the same thought. Gilbert was about to ask when he said, serious, "What
exactly are ye worried about? I doubt he's upset with ye or regrets whatever ye
did. Tha' lad looks at ye like ye hung tha moon whenever he's not eye-fuckin'
ye."
That last made Gilbert stumble. "What?You're fucking with me."
"No. I'm pretty sure he's not goin' ta stop seein' ye and I doubt ye hurt 'em;
ye care too much ta ever do somethin' that hurt could Mattie. Jus' talk ta
him."
The fact that Alistair was absolutely sure he couldn't have hurt him made him
relax a little. "Thanks, Scottie, I really appreciate that."
Alistair smiled at him, but there was something tight about it. "Of course. If
ye want, I can talk ta 'em. I'm sure he'll want ta see ye later anyway, but he
may be nervous about somethin' he'll tell a friend but not his boyfriend. If
it's somethin' I can help with, I want ta." He said it quietly, as if he wasn't
sure how Gilbert would take it.
Gilbert licked his lips and came to the realization that Alistair wasn'tjust
attracted to Matthew anymore, but that he caredabout him. He was happy they
were friends, especially since Matthew didn't have a lot of people who knew him
let alone hung out with. He couldn't logically justify telling Alistair no, at
least not out loud. If he was being perfectly honest with himself, Gilbert
couldn't say which bothered him more: the thought that Matthew possibly wished
it was Alistair he was with the night before or that Alistair had really
started to care for Matthew in a way he never had for anyone else, including
Gilbert. That he couldn't definitively say which made him feel worse was the
most disturbing of all.
He cleared his throat and said, "Yeah, thanks. I'm just worried about him and
I'm sure he would appreciate it."
"I know. I'll just catch him after his last class. I know ye see him before
tha' but I want ta check in all tha same." Alistair busied himself with
throwing on the last of his uniform and packing his bag for the day. "Come on,
we need ta go."
Gilbert was silent as he followed his friend, fighting the urge to share with
him what he was feeling like he always did. Matthew was his boyfriend, but
Gilbert was uncomfortably aware that if Alistair had found him first, that
would not be the case. He knew talking to Matthew about last night would help,
but now that the thought had occurred, he didn't know if one conversation would
be able to shake it completely.
===============================================================================
It was too warm to wear a scarf, especially for Matthew, so he was stuck
maintaining a small concealing spell to hide the mark on his neck. It wasn't
obnoxiously big, but it was just enough to be immediately noticed and, of
course it rested at the edge of his collar. It was a pain and distracting, but
he was still glad to have it. He was just lucky he didn't have any test that
day and his professors let him attend class with the spell going without
comment.
Matthew was expecting Gilbert to be outside of the potions classroom to walk
him to his history of magic class, as always, and was not disappointed. He
leaned against the wall in front of the classroom door casually, arms crossed
comfortably and posture relaxed. He had his sleeves rolled up to elbows today,
reveling muscled forearms, a fact that didn't go without whispered comment by
other students in his year. Any other day, and Matthew would have grinned at
him in greeting. As it was, he just lightly smiled at him, nervous because he
wasn't sure how this was going to go. "Hey, Gil."
Gilbert smirked at him, eyes sharper than usual as they took in Matthew. The
look only served to set him on edge further and he felt his smile become
brittle and looked away. Still, he reached out, hoping that Gilbert would take
his hand.
"Hey, Birdie." Gilbert grasped his hand and pulled them down the corridor.
Matthew risked a glance at his boyfriend, only to see him watching him closely.
Matthew looked away quickly with a blush, cursing himself all the while. Now
was not the time to fall into the role of the blushing virgin, but he found
himself incapable to doing much else, despite what he and Lovino had discussed
in the wee hours of the morning.
Matthew had wanted to know how Lovino had controlled himself around Antonio the
years he loved him, but refused to act on it. Turns out that it was a
combination of low self-esteem, outrage that Antonio didn't remember Matthew,
and living in denial, most of which couldn't be applied to this situation.
Lovino didn't have concrete evidence like his friend that he and Antonio were
compatible and Gilbert hadn't done anything wrong. They had spoken for at least
an hour about what to do that boiled down to the following: explain things to
Gilbert as soon as possible and don't get caught with his eyes glowing. It was
presumable that, once things were explained, Gilbert would help him keep his
secret by not pushing him in public. Until then, he just had to not touch him
too much.
Matthew had firmly decided to only share his parentage and how that was making
puberty for him ten times worse. He was only going to explain that small
transformations would happen around Gilbert because they were dating and
Matthew really liked him, not that they were mates. He wanted Gilbert to come
to like him without the knowledge and he had until their shared dream in July
to spell it out for him. Considering it was already mid-April, that didn't
leave him a lot of time, but a couple months to come to terms with him being
half-Veela was a hell of a lot better than five minutes betweenhey, I'm not
human and I was made to be with you.
One thing Matthew was a little unsure about was how being his mate effected
Gilbert. His mother's letter implied that mates could choose not to be with
each other, though usually only humans would do that. Did that mean Matthew was
born for Gilbert but the reverse wasn't true? Because he was only half-Veela,
did his genetics effect the strength of their bond so that he was the only one
affected? Matthew didn't know and thought caution was highly appropriate. When
he explained his worries, a very pale Lovino had agreed, but not before
admitting that sounded like hell.
Back in the present, Gilbert had caught his glance and squeezed his hand a
little. With a low voice he asked, "You okay?"
Quietly, Matthew responded with, "Yeah. There's just, um, something I need to
talk to you about." He felt Gilbert stiffen beside him, even his hand going
rigid with sudden tension. "It's nothing bad, I promise! Well, maybe that's not
the right word…nothing's wrong. I just…have to tell you something about me
since we're together."
Gilbert didn't say anything for a long while as they made their way through the
hallways. They were making good time which meant he didn't have long until they
separated and still no answer from Gilbert. Matthew grew increasingly nervous
at the silence, but Gilbert hadn't released his hand. If anything, he had
gripped it tighter.
Matthew made a sound of surprise when he was suddenly jerked down a mostly
empty corridor. Students were still milling about, but it was a far cry less
busy than the one they had been traveling down. Gilbert pulled him over to a
small alcove on the side and turned to look at him. He looked agitated and
concerned.
With a low voice he asked, "Is this about what happened last night?"
Matthew sighed. He was going to have to avoid lying as much as possible, so he
would only say what was necessary to reassure him. "Yes, but I swear you didn't
do anything wrong or something that upset me. In fact, I—" Matthew blushed and
looked away but forced himself to continue. "—I really liked what happened. I
love being with you, it's just that I love it a little too much, if that makes
sense?"
"No, Mattie, not really," Gilbert said, tilting Matthew's chin up so they could
look at each other. He seemed mildly relieved if a little bemused.
Matthew winced and said, "I would explain now but it's really personal and not
just my secret. It's nothing urgent but when are you free next? I know you have
a game tomorrow."
"How about tonight, when I get out of class? Or Sunday morning?"
"How about Sunday?" He could certainly use the time to parse out what exactly
he was going to say.
"Sure, about ten, by the greenhouse closest to the lake or, if it's raining, we
can meet by the front door and find somewhere to talk from there?"
"Okay." Matthew turned to head back into the flow of foot traffic and Gilbert
took his hand again. Sunday worked well enough. He had sent a message first to
Headmistress McGonagall to let her know that his symptoms had started and asked
for Gilbert to be alerted if he ever had to be set to the hospital wing because
of a rage. Matthew was hoping that Gilbert wouldn't be too bothered by the news
that he has been dating someone not completely human and would want to be there
to help calm him. If it turned out to be otherwise, he would change it later,
thought he really was hoping it wouldn't come to that.
Matthew had also sent a letter to his mother, notifying her that he had found
his mate and that it indeed was Gilbert and asking some pretty pointed
questions about what the hell was going on. Was Gilbert feeling anything new
because of Matthew's revelation? How exactly was he supposed to gently break it
to his boyfriend, who he had only been seeing for six weeks, that they were
fated to spend the rest of their lives together? Was there a way to internalize
a rage so that he didn't reveal his and Alfred's secret to the whole school?
How was he going to break it to his twin that his mate was someone he hated? He
wouldn't give up on Gilbert and he was waiting until after he had explained his
heritage to tell Alfred the happy if concerning news. He could only take one
thing at a time and Gilbert was his biggest concern right now.
"Hey, earth to Birdie." Gilbert lightly squeezed his hand and Matthew blinked,
coming back to the present to find them close to the classroom.
"I'm sorry, Gil. What were you saying?"
Gilbert lightly chuckled, but it was too worried to really work. "Are you sure
you're okay? You're not getting sick are you?" He put a hand to Matthew's
forehead briefly before moving it to cup his cheek. Matthew melted into the
touch and turned to kiss Gilbert's palm.
"I'm fine. Just a lot on my mind. What was it?"
Gilbert frowned and said, "Nothing important, just if you were looking forward
to the game tomorrow."
Matthew automatically tensed and his eyes widened. Shit, he thought. He had
always gone to Gilbert and Alistair's games and they were playing Hufflepuff.
It would be strange if he didn't go. But his mate had made himself a prime
target for any other team's beater. While the situation surely wasn't as bad as
it would have been if the game was Slytherin vs. Gryffindor (which wasthe last
game of the year and in two weeks), Matthew doubted attending would be wise.
"Ah, no, probably not. With O.W.L.s coming up and us meeting on Sunday I should
finish my homework and study tomorrow."
Gilbert frowned at him harder and moved to actually check his temperature
again. "You're not going to a Quidditch game, with both your house and mine
playing? Now I know something's wrong. Does this have to do with what you want
to tell me? Do you want to meet earlier?"
"Yes, but no. Really, it can wait, angel, I promise. I've got to go." Matthew
leaned up and gave Gilbert a quick kiss before saying softly when they were
still close, "If I don't see you before then, don't hurt my house mates?"
"It won't be intentional, but no promises." Gilbert smirked but his brow was
still furrowed in confusion and concern. "See you soon, Birdie."
Matthew turned and walked into class just as Professor Binns started passing
back the exams they had taken earlier in the week. He quietly and quickly made
it to his seat, mind more preoccupied with how he was going to avoid Gilbert.
This was his last class of the week and when he got out, Gilbert would be in
his N.E.W.T defense against the dark arts class, one of the many he shared with
Alistair. He could just stay in the Hufflepuff Basement and filch food from the
kitchens for the next day and a half. It seemed like the easy way out, but he
didn't want to press his luck and going into his first rage at a Quidditch game
sounded like the equivalent of advertising his heritage on a billboard by the
lake. No, he would hear about things from Lovino. He could only pray like hell
that Gilbert didn't get hurt.
===============================================================================
Professor Patil had let her N.E.W.T. class out early that day to prepare for an
exam they had on Tuesday, meaning that Alistair had barely enough time to
intercept Matthew as he was leaving his History of Magic lesson. Gilbert had
come to class looking only slightly mollified after speaking to Matthew, so
Alistair thought it was safe to assume not everything there was resolved. He
was certain that Gilbert didn't hurt Matthew, but something nagged at him about
the entire thing. Matthew had proven more than once just how much he despised
conflict and how quick he was to blame himself if something went wrong. He was
honest about most things, but was obviously avoiding some things that made
Alistair sure he was keeping something big from both Gilbert and himself.
That something was beyond never addressing the fact that he wanted them both.
Matthew did a good job of pushing through moments that were so thick with
potential that Alistair has trouble focusing on anything other than the younger
boy, but Matthew was too new at wanting someone that he hasn't quite gotten the
hang of hiding his reactions. Neither of them would let something happen
between them, but it was painfully obvious to Alistair, and probably Gilbert,
how much they both wanted each other.
Back to the point, Matthew always made vague comments about his family and how
weird they supposedly were. He seemed certain that his public invisibility was
inherited, but never elaborated on why he thought that. Alistair had been
around him often enough now to see how people's eyes jumped over Matthew or
looked right through him, but Alfred seemed to draw the attention of anyone
close to him. Since they were identical, it was possible that they had split
some magical characteristic between them and couldn't control it, but Alistair
hadn't had the time to properly research what that trait could be. It stood to
reason that, if the trait had been born complete in either one of them, the
effects wouldn't be so extreme. And if the characteristic was inherited, not
placed on them as a curse, then that would most likely mean that neither of
them were entirely human since wizards weren't born with something like that.
All of that was a long shot, by far, but it would explain why Matthew was so
reluctant to talk about his family and any otherworldly traits he seemed to
have (his grace, for one). But Alistair hadn't had time to look any of that up
as the end of the year approached and didn't have the slightest idea why
Matthew not being human would make him turn away from Gilbert after he had
obviously enjoyed himself quite a bit.
Did Alistair sound bitter? Because he wasn't, really. It didn't bother him at
all to see the marks Matthew's hands had left on Gilbert's back or the one his
mouth left on his collarbone.
Just like he wasn't bothered by the small hickey visible on Matthew neck as he
exited the classroom. No, Alistair wasn't irritated in the least. Though, if
Gilbert had been deliberately marking his territory then it was clearly meant
for Alistair because who else wanted Matthew like he did and Alistairdidn't
fucking need the reminder not to touch him, thanks! I'm completely fucking
aware he's yours and not mine, never—
…Anyway, he wasn't bothered. In fact, his voice was nonchalant when he called
to get Matthew's attention. "Hey, Mattie! Wait up."
Matthew startled, making a small noise of surprise as he whipped his head
around to find Alistair. His concentration must have slipped in that moment
because what had been a small bruise just above the collar of his shirt grew to
be only half covered by the fabric. Fuck. Every time he moved his head, Matthew
must have been reminded of the mark he wore, of who put it there. He blinked
his eyes in shock before he smiled at him, though Alistair noted that he seemed
tired and distracted. If he had been concealing that love bite with a spell all
day, Alistair could understand why and something about that made him angry.
"Oh! Hi, Alistair. I didn't see you there. How are you?"
Alistair frowned and looked him over. Not only was he pale, there was a tension
to his brow, a slump in his shoulders, and the slightest shake to his hands.
Matthew wasn't just tired; he was exhausted and stressed. "I think I should be
tha one askin' ye that. Yer shakin' with exhaustion. Are ye okay?"
Matthew ducked his head and moved to stand to one side of the hallway with him.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I just, um, didn't get much sleep last night."
"I figured after I saw tha marks on Gilly's back." Matthew turned red, so
Alistair hastened to continue. "But ye look more than tired and Gilbert was
really worried about ye this mornin'. Ye know I won't tell him somethin' if ye
don't want me ta and ye can talk ta me. I want ye ta be alright 'cause yer me
mate, too, yeah?"
Matthew flinched hard at his words for some reason then seemed to sway to the
side. Alistair's hands were automatically coming up to catch him when he
steadied himself against the wall. Matthew shook his head and seemed on the
verge of panting for breath as he said, "Thanks. I really appreciate that."
His hands still hovering in front of him, Alistair asked, alarmed, "Did ye
almost just faint?"
"Um, maybe? I haven't really eaten much today."
Alistair stared at him. "How much did ye eat?"
"…Nothing, yet. I've been pretty stressed and busy with school and stuff today
and haven't really been hungry."
Alistair wasn't going to physically haul Matthew to the Great Hall or the
kitchens for food, but that was more because they pointedly didn't touch each
other than concern for Matthew's pride. "Mattie, you can't decide not ta eat.
Ye have ta eat a little somethin' even when yer not hungry. C'mon, I'll walk ye
to tha kitchens."
"That's really not—" Whatever Matthew was going to say was cut off by a loud,
painful-sounding growl from his stomach. He winced and curled in on himself a
little.
"Ye were sayin'?"
"Lead the way. I'll grab something fast but I really just want to sleep for
twelve hours."
Alistair began walking towards the basement, more aware than usual of Matthew's
proximity out of concern (okay, only mostly). "Does this happen often? Tha
whole nort sleepin' or eatin' thing because tha's pretty worrying."
Matthew sighed. "No. Well, I don't sleep well sometimes but I eat what I think
is a normal amount. Today I had a lot on my mind and kinda…forgot to eat. I
think I need a day off from everything at this point."
"Anythin' I can help ye with?"
Matthew was quiet for a moment before saying, "No, but thank you. It's just—do
you ever wish you had been born into a different family?" Then he seemed to
remember who he was talking to and paled further, looking almost ghost white.
"Oh, God, that was a horrible thing to ask. Please ignore me."
The question threw him because Alistair was under the impression this was about
Gilbert and whatever the couple did the night before. "Er, no? It's okay,
Matthew, I don't want ye ta watch yer tongue around me but I love me family.
Sure, we have our problems and I wish things were different, but it works for
us. Why? Do ye?"
"Only when problems crop up at the most inconvenient times like this. I'm just
trying to have a regular dating life and survive my O.W.L.s but I guess the
universe decided to give me the extra-special treat of family crap. I love
them, really, but sometimes I really wish we were normal."
"Wha's normal?"
The question seemed to startle Matthew and he stumbled. Thankfully, they were
on the last step to the basement at the time and Matthew corrected himself
before he fell. It was the most uncoordinated Alistair had ever seen him but he
still didn't move stiffly or awkwardly. Both Matthew's recovery and Alistair's
instinctive movement to catch him had put them within a hair's breadth of each
other and the seconds before they both hastened away was so thick with tension
that Alistair thought he would choke on it. But the moment passed, like all the
ones that came before it, and Matthew cleared his throat. He looked extremely
troubled as they turned towards the kitchen and continued walking. "That's a
good question, but, whatever it is, I know it's not my family. Nothing's ever
simple, even when it should be."
Quietly, Alistair said, "…Ye can trust me. If yer losing sleep and not eating
over whatever it is, I want ta help ye if I can." When Matthew didn't
immediately respond, Alistair glanced over to see him staring at him with a
pained expression that was full of something close to heartbreak that it made
him panic a little. "Mattie, what's tha' look fer? Wha's wrong?"
Matthew closed his eyes and shook his head for a moment before focusing once
more on walking down the corridor. "Nothing. I just really need to sleep and…I
do trust you, Alistair. If there's something you could do, I would tell you."
Alistair was having a hard time believing that and was only more concerned than
before. Still, his first priority was making sure Matthew didn't pass out on
the way to his dorm. "Thank ye. Tha's all I ask. Noo, let's get ye some food
before I have ta carry ye ta tha clinic."
===============================================================================
Matthew was too exhausted to be panicked, but the anxiety running through him
made it a near thing. Why was he close to losing it?
Because he had a mate and had hoped that the realization would make his
feelings for one of the Slytherin beaters dissipate but he still wanted
Alistair. When Matthew had stumbled the last time on the way to the basement,
he had wanted nothing more than to close the distance between them and wrap his
arms around his mate's best friend. He was too tired to deny it to himself how
much he had wanted to kiss him with gratitude at his concern, curl around him
in sleep, and cry at how much Alistair clearly cared about him because the
feeling was mutual. But this shouldn't be possible.
This was all the more confusing because he didn't care about Gilbert an ounce
less. Matthew was ecstatic that Gilbert was his mate and wanted him as much as
his next breath. So why did he want someone else, too?
Could he have them both?
Matthew flinched away from the thought. No, of course not. Right?
He needed to send another letter to his mother in the morning, though he had an
idea of what she would say. The idea wasn't encouraging.
Matthew feelings for Alistair had to have been just the exhaustion talking.
Sleep might change how intense everything felt at the moment, but it wouldn't
change the fact that he was made for Gilbert, had changed on a biological level
for Gilbert. He just needed rest.
Alistair had left him with a concerned look that stayed with Matthew as he
blearily went through his routine to prepare for bed. He shook his head to
clear it away and was still shaking it when Lovino entered their room several
moments later.
Immediately seeing that something was amiss, Lovino was across the room in what
seemed like a blink. Fuck, maybe he was losing time. "Matthew? What's wrong?"
In a tone that was almost afraid, Matthew said softly, "I still want them both,
Lovi. I shouldn't, but, God help me, I do. How is that possible?"
Lovino stared at him for a long minute before asking carefully, "Did something
happen? Between you and Alistair?"
A sickening thrill went through him at the insinuation. "No, I would never
betray Gilbert. God, even the thought of me hurting him makes me nauseous and
panicky. I thought finding out he was my mate would make all my feelings for
Alistair go away. But they didn't, Lovi. All Alistair did today was be a good
friend and I wanted nothing more than to touch him, to just grab him and not
let go. Why do I feel like this? Why do I want someone else when I have
Gilbert?" His vision swam and he blinked rapidly to clear it. The action only
made the tears spill over.
"Okay, Matthew? Remember a few weeks ago when you told me you were afraid
Gilbert might want Alistair more than you?" The question only made Matthew sob.
Of course, he thought. How could I forget I could lose my mate to his best
friend?"Fuck, shit, don't cry, okay? I only meant that you wouldn't be the only
one in your relationship with wandering eyes. You both seem committed to each
other, and that's great, but have you considered that you could have both of
them? I know I've joked about it in the past but fuck if I'm not serious now.
Maybe all three of you could date each other?"
Matthew laughed mirthlessly. "I'm pretty sure the only reason Gilbert's dating
me and not Alistair is that Alistair never showed interest in being serious
with him. I would rather not be third wheel in my relationship with my mate.
And even if I wasn't, even if it all worked out, Veela only have one soul
they're bonded to, a soul some wait literal centuries to find again after their
death if they're mortal. How could I be in a relationship with someone who's
notmy mate now that I've found him?"
"You're sure you can't have two mates? It's not like you've touched Alistair or
hit your birthday to know for sure he's not your mate."
Matthew slouched dejectedly. "If it was possible, then that would be wonderful.
But it's not. I can ask my mom to be sure, but I've never heard of a Veela
having two mates. It's completely counterintuitive. It's going to be hard
enough to get one human mate to stay with me. Two just seems greedy. Unwise…Too
good to be true."
Aaaand he was back to being morose. Lovino sighed. "Okay. If you say so. Get
some sleep; you look like a feather could knock you over. Did you sleep at all
last night?"
"No," Matthew said as he moved to lay down.
"That's what you look like. Things will make a lot more sense after you've
rested."
Matthew doubted it but Lovino was concerned enough that he wasn't cursing so he
didn't argue. He was asleep the second his head hit the pillow.
By the time he woke up, nothing had changed, but his course of action was clear
in any case. He had two goals: stay Alistair's friend and be a good mate to
Gilbert. With a plan that simple, nothing could go wrong.
Now, the next thing to worry about was telling his boyfriend he wasn't human.
Great.
===============================================================================
Gilbert paced by the front door on Sunday morning, waiting for Matthew to meet
him. He had arrived early, too anxious to wait in his room any longer. He had
been worried about him since they had last spoken on Friday and his concern had
only grown when Alistair had returned from meeting up with Matthew after his
class. It took a lot for Alistair to get the pinched look of concern in his
brow and the sight alone almost made Gilbert panic.
Once he had explained that Matthew had neither eaten nor slept since the day
before prior to Alistair escorting him to the kitchens, Gilbert had wanted to
go to him immediately. Alistair stopped him by reasoning that he was probably
asleep by now, but Gilbert still sent him an owl for him to read after waking
asking after his health and if he wanted to meet earlier.
Gilbert had received a reply just as he was leaving for the Quidditch pitch. No
need to worry. I'm fine, just needed some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow. Good
luck today. –Your Mattie
While the note was marginally reassuring, Gilbert was still worried. Every sign
was pointing to the importance of this upcoming conversation and he couldn't
help the nerves that came with the awareness. The feelings forced him awake at
seven that morning, unheard of on a Sunday after a game. As a result, he was
deliberately trying to stay calm by the castle's main entrance, a steady fall
of light rain barely discernable through the door. He felt like he was nearly
vibrating with impatience and concern, his mind in utter disarray as various
possibilities made their appearance. Yet, his watch informed him it was still
only 9:50.
"Gil?" Gilbert looked up to see Matthew not five feet from him. He startled at
his quiet approach but smiled quickly enough to hopefully hide his reaction.
Clearly, he was worried enough to be distracted from what went on around him
and he wanted to downplay his anxiety to avoid causing Matthew any more.
"Hey, Mattie. How are you feeling?"
Matthew fidgeted and stared at the floor. "Alright, I guess. Sorry about your
loss yesterday. Is Alistair feeling better?"
"Thanks and yeah, he's fine now," Gilbert mumbled, not particularly interested
in pursuing that topic of conversation. His mind had been entirely focused on
other things yesterday during the game, namely the boy in front of him. He had
been preoccupied with how he had missed the fact that Matthew was exhausted or
distressed enough not to eat the day prior. If Alistair hadn't been there to
all but drag him to the kitchens, Matthew might have gotten sick and Gilbert
wouldn't have known. Yes, Matthew was entitled to his privacy and everything,
but Gilbert cared enough to want to know, to want to do anything he could to
help him. He wanted to be there for him and that Matthew was worried enough to
put himself in danger and to not tell him about it out of fear of Gilbert's
comfort took his attention away from the match. The only reason he hadn't ended
up in the hospital wing with a broken arm (or worse) from a bludger was
Alistair's attention. Then again, his best friend hadn't exactly been at the
top of his game either, spraining his wrist from a block that lacked the proper
form that otherwise had been drilled into him since they started practicing
years ago. It was a quick fix, but a telling injury. Natalia ended up yelling
at them both, but Gilbert knew it was her way of showing concern. If she were
truly angry she would have given them both the cold shoulder.
Gilbert cleared his throat and said, "It's raining right now. Do you know where
you want to go instead?" It would probably be hard to find a private spot in
the castle, but they were out of options.
Matthew met his eyes and smiled wryly. "Yes; outside would be great if you
don't mind the light chill."
Gilbert frowned. He was wearing his boots but he had forgone his waterproof
cloak. "Sure, it's warm enough. Let me run back for my cloak."
"You'll be okay, trust me. Here, one sec." Matthew pulled out his wand and
pointed it upwards. While bringing it down in a measured arc between them, he
said, "Umbraquā."
Gilbert stared at him a moment then smiled. "An umbrella charm?"
Matthew grinned at him for the first time since their date on Thursday.
"Someone had to come up with one. It wasn't even that hard and you can't always
have an enchanted cloak on you." The smile faded quickly and Matthew continued,
more somber, "Shall we?"
Gilbert just nodded and turned to open the door. They walked in silence for a
few moments as they headed towards the lake (their usual spot in the forest
being an unwise option considering the weather). Matthew's spell created a
water repellent force field around each of them in about a foot in every
direction. Or at least, falling water repellent. It did nothing about the mud
or puddles, though it was certainly sufficient enough for their purposes. To
break the silence, Gilbert asked how Matthew had come up with the charm,
wanting to reach out and take his hand but resisting. Matthew quietly explained
how the Latin was easy enough to put together, but the wand motion took some
figuring. He finished with, "It took me standing outside for about two hours in
a thunderstorm to finally get it, but now it's pretty close to perfect. I'm
happy with it."
"You should be proud, too, Liebling.Not many people our age understand charms
well enough to make their own. That's amazing." Matthew blushed and looked down
to unsuccessfully hide his smile. God, he's so cute. Gilbert stared at him for
a moment, just to look, but then something occurred and he was reminded of why
they were here. "Two hours? In a storm? Matthew, didn't you get sick?"
Matthew shook his head and looked around. They had reached the edge of the lake
and were the only people out today. This was probably as private as things were
going to get, considering the rain was concealing them from the castle well and
being in the forest in a storm was stupid (magic did not stop physics allthe
time). Matthew signed and seemed to straighten his back. "No. I don't really
get sick…ever."
"Everybody gets sick. Especially if you don't eat or sleep." Gilbert looked at
him pointedly and Matthew winced.
"Hunger and exhaustion are different, are universal constants. The majority of
bacterial and viral illnesses are particularly…human." Matthew's eyes flashed
to him and stayed. Gilbert similarly stared because, um, what?
"And you're not…human," Gilbert said slowly, thinking the sentence was utterly
ridiculous but having to say it anyway to return certainty to the world.
Matthew licked his lips and said, "Half. I'm half human."
Gilbert blinked at him and did his best not to react outwardly, thinking
furiously. Okay,this was new. Maybe he should treat this like a coming out
thing? Because Matthew had clearly been not entirely human this entire time,
was the same person for all of Gilbert learning this new thing about him. He
clearly needed to say something, because Matthew had gone stiff with poorly
concealed panic. So he finally reached out to grab his hand and said, "Okay.
Thank you for telling me and I'm happy you feel comfortable enough to share
this with me."
Matthew's eye widened with shock. "You're…you're okay with this? You're
not…repulsed or afraid?"
Gilbert frowned at him. "Of course not. You're still you. I am curious, but I
don't want to make you share something with me you aren't comfortable with."
Matthew stayed stock still for a moment before saying quietly, "You only say
that because you don't know what the other half is yet."
"I really doubt that, whatever your genetics, will change how I feel about you.
Unless…" A really awful thought occurred, but he quickly dismissed it with a
sharp shake of his head. "No, you were too surprised that I remembered you to
have done anything to my mind and you're not the type. I know you, Matthew,
certainly well enough to know when you're being anything but genuine."
Matthew's eyes widened and his posture relaxed marginally. "Even if I could, I
would never try to take away your free will, Gil. You will always have choices,
I promise. Thank you for your trust. I…It means more than you know."
Because of that statement, you've earned it.Gilbert smiled softly at him and
tried to draw him closer. Surprisingly, Matthew resisted and let go of his hand
altogether. When he started shaking his head, Gilbert asked, "What is it?"
"There's more and, as my boyfriend, you need to know it. The fact that I, and
by extension my brother, am not entirely human is a well-kept secret for two
reasons. One, kids can be cruel and teenagers more so and being different can
be difficult. We would rather not be seen as the token half-breeds in a room."
Gilbert winced. That sounded like something people would focus on. "I
understand. I wouldn't tell anyone without your permission, not even Scottie or
West."
"Thank you. The second reason is that we're…my mother, she's…we're Veela."
Bullshit was Gilbert's immediate internal response. Sure, Matthew was beautiful
(and, yeah, was really fair, with gold-blond hair, unusual blue eyes, a strange
poise that…oh), but come on. Matthew, a harpy? Matthew was one of the calmest
people he knew. Okay, there was that one time he was pissed at his brother and
yelled at him for a good twenty minutes and that thing with his patronus and
Antonio…but those were little things.
Gilbert had been quiet too long and Matthew started rambling. "Veela have this
reputation of being these malicious sirens who screw with people's heads, you
know? And people sometimes assume that if they want you then they're entitled
to you or that Veela are inherently available like that and it's all such crap
that an entire speciesis reduced to being attractive and volatile. Alfred likes
attention but he knows he would hate that kind and so would I and please say
something!"
Right. His boyfriend was in distress. He needed to focus. "Okay, so you're a
Veela. You said something on Friday…how does this effect our relationship?"
Matthew seemed to relax further, but still remained just out of Gilbert's
reach. It was bothering him. A lot. "Veela go through a very…trying maturation
process. Think of it as all human puberty condensed into one year." Gilbert
sucked in a breath through his teeth in a mixture of sympathy and horror.
"Exactly. While being only half is making the transition to adulthood easier
than if I was completely Veela…"
"You're still going to have a year of hell."
"Yes. More than that, actually, since I've technically already started. Just
started, in fact. On Friday."
That's really exact ti—oh, fuck. Gilbert, for the first time in this bizarre
conversation, felt his jaw drop. "You're saying that, when we were together,
you…"
Matthew's face was bright red and Gilbert felt a similar blush spread across
his cheeks. "I, uh, wasn't kidding when I said I liked it too much."
No shit."Not that this isn't an ego boost, but should I apologize for…"
"No! No, never apologize for that. I should have known better but, in all
honesty, there aren't that many known Veela hybrids and almost all of them are
women. There's not exactly a rule book that I can refer back to so I can
understand what the hell is going on with my body. Besides, I'm pretty sure
it's established that I really enjoyed myself."
Finally, an opening to ask something that had been eating at him him for days.
"If you were…content, then why did you pull away from me after? You would
barely touch me or look at me and I was very worried. Then to hear from
Alistair how you almost fainted Friday was scary. Could you please explain what
all that was?"
Matthew shook his head but at least reached out to take his hand again. He
laced their fingers together and said, "Friday I was overwhelmed, between
anxiety over this conversation and focusing on controlling myself constantly
while getting through class. Alistair and Lovi both expressed their concern and
I'll try harder to avoid that situation in the future. And during our date…I
realized just how little control I have when I'm with you." That last was said
so quietly that Gilbert had to strain to hear it over the rain still falling
around them. It didn't sound good.
"What does that mean, Matthew?"
Matthew met his eyes and stepped closer. Removing his glasses, he flicked dark
blue eyes down to Gilbert's lips and said, "Maybe I could show you?"
Gilbert didn't know exactly what he had in mind, but he did have a decent idea
of how he intended to start. He kissed him soundly, thoroughly, and it was like
a rare sunny day, refreshing and utterly intoxicating. Matthew melted into the
embrace and opened for him with a low moan. A hand in his boyfriend's hair,
Gilbert forgot what the point of this exercise was beyond the kiss itself until
the sudden feeling of cold water falling on his head. They both broke away with
startled gasps as Matthew's concentration snapped the spell back into place,
but the damage was done and holy shit.
Gilbert stared at Matthew, at his glowing eyes with the now vertical pupils and
ice blue irises, and understood. "How?" he asked, fascinated.
Matthew raised a hand to touch his mouth and he said distractedly, "It is true
that Veela can transform into something like harpies when enraged, but the
legends don't say what happens when they feel a different kind of passion. When
you touch me, my heart races and my eyes show how much I burn." Matthew then
blinked and cleared his throat. "Sorry. Yikes, forget I said any of that. Uh,
this is why I distanced myself last week. I didn't want you to see me like this
without understanding, without giving me a chance to explain what I am and that
I would never hurt you."
Gilbert had a lot of questions, most of them being variations of whatand how?
At that moment he had two priorities. He leaned down to kiss Matthew again,
just to reassure him that he was okay with the new eyes. When they pulled away,
he held him close and asked, "How can I help?"
===============================================================================
Alistair had finallyfound time in his schedule to research what Matthew could
possibly be. Matthew had told him not to worry about his social invisibility
problem, but that didn't stop Alistair from wanting to know, partially because
he actually wanted to help and partially because he just really wanted to know.
But, if he was being honest with himself, he made the time because it was clear
that Gilbert knew now and wasn't going to tell him.
Okay, there wasn't anything Gilbert did that would have tipped him off to the
new knowledge if he wasn't looking for it, but he could read between the lines
and knew Gilbert like the back of his hand. Alistair had been anxious (though
hiding it well, he thought) about Gilbert talking to Matthew the day before,
expecting to get some kind of explanation of Matthew's behavior because
something had been deeply troubling him on Friday and nothing had changed.
Sure, hunger and exhaustion will make someone act off but…it didn't make sense
for Matthew to react to being with Gilbert by not eating unless something was
wrong. And the comment about his family…it had to do with what he was. For
Gilbert to be so settled after one conversation, it only made sense that he
knew what was going on.
And it burned that Matthew trusted Gilbert with the knowledge but not him.
Sure, they spent more time together and weredating, but that didn't change how
Alistair felt about it. He lacked the patience for Matthew to tell him on his
own, if he was ever going to, and he wanted to help. He would keep Matthew's
secret, of course he would, but he needed to know what that secret was first.
Alistair denied himself much, but never knowledge.
Okay, he thought to himself, roaming the shelves of the library. What do I know
for certain?
One: Matthew wasn't entirely human, which was fine. People who thought people
with other genetic heritages as less were idiotic bigots, wizards or no. The
fact that the two species of whatever could have children narrowed the pool
quite a bit, especially since that pairing's child could pass as a normal
(vanilla?) wizard/witch. So, probably under the classification of Being.
Alistair found an encyclopedia of Beings and their histories and sat at one of
the tables. His eyes immediately moved past the more feral members of the
classification. He began to idly put down his ideas on paper. He would burn it
later, but it would help the process.
Two: He could rarely be seen while his brother drew nearly everyone's eye. The
combination of the two effects would be less severe, probably, because they
would balance each other out. In theory. And the result would be…what? Having
control over being seen or not? Being a chameleon? Confusing people's memories
of you? Something to consider.
Three: Matthew had a strange, almost entrancing grace. He was pale, though
Alfred couldn't say the same. Alistair would say that Matthew was fair, thought
that didn't really seem to encompass the striking combination of his white-gold
hair and deep blue eyes. He was being honest with himself, so Alistair noted
the way he felt the constant urge to just touch him whenever they were
together, present ever since he held his hand too long when they were
introduced. It would be alarming if Gilbert didn't act the same way. Okay,
maybe that was still alarming, though Matthew didn't seem to know anything
about it, let alone cause it consciously. Then again, the tension Alistair felt
between them certainly wasn't one sided, so maybe he felt the urge to touch
him, too, and they were just too good at controlling themselves?
Alistair skimmed through the table of contents, mentally crossing things out as
he went. His known facts ruled out Giants, Goblins, hags, and werewolves,
leaving only vampires and…and…
Oh, he thought, of course. Alistair flipped to the disappointingly thin section
on Veela and began to read.
===============================================================================
"Alistair, I hate to say it, but you're nuts if you think I'll actually be able
to do that!" Matthew stared at him with wide eyes, expression startled as he
lowered his wand.
Alistair, looking characteristically nonchalant, shrugged. "I believe ye can do
it, if ye tried."
"But I just got the vanishing spell to work, and you want me to bring it
back?!"
"Aye," Alistair answered simply, gaze steady and amused and Matthew slumped in
defeat. He wouldn't win this argument though he truly didn't want to do this.
Alistair had been helping him get the hang of performing the vanishing spell on
mice, a damned frustrating task if he had ever been given one. He had asked
Gilbert to help him at lunch when they were with the group earlier that day and
Gilbert said he had been putting off his potions essay but really needed to get
started on it that evening. Alistair had volunteered to help him after he got
out of DATDA and Matthew really hadn't been in a position to refuse. He had a
test on this on Monday and too much other work to do over the weekend to turn
down help.
He had done his best these past few days to act like nothing had changed
between them and he thinks he did an okay job. Matthew still smiled at him the
way he usually did, accepted his help on the way to classes as was customary by
that point, and ate lunch with him at the Slytherin table. Yet, he had also
done his best to keep them from being alone together.
Maybe it was all in his head, but it seemed like Alistair had started staring
at him longer and harder, like he had started to walk close enough to him
between classes so Matthew could feel to heat roll off of him in a way that
registered as all too welcoming. He was used to avoiding as much heat as
possible. Yet, Matthew found himself meeting his eyes for a period that was
just a tad too long and leaning into his warmth, though they still never
touched. It was enthralling. It was maddening. It needed to stop, but Matthew
was reluctant to bring it up in conversation, to force them to verbally
acknowledge the air between them and just how tenuous the situation had become.
It would probably take another few days for his mother to get back to him on
all his questions and mercy, but he needed answers yesterday. He needed to know
how he could feel like this, want Alistair like this when he was so fucking
happy with Gilbert that he couldn't see straight. Gilbert was his mate. It made
no sense to him, to want someone else so much. When he had expressed his
concerns to Lovino, his friend had stared at him thoughtfully and asked, "How
long do you go without touching Gilbert when you're around him?"
"What?" Matthew had asked, frowning. When Lovino just stared at him expectedly,
Matthew had answered. "Not long, I guess. We usually greet each other with a
kiss and he likes holding my hand…?" Lovino had only made a considering noise
in the back of his throat (that he refused to explain) and pursed his lips at
him in response.
He needed his mother to get back to him for other reasons, because other things
had started to change. He felt hungry now nearly all the time and had taken to
eating much more than he could have handled before. He wanted to know if the
appetite was permanent and or would go away soon. His table mates had noticed
the shift and Gilbert had taken to bringing him snacks between classes, which
helped. He also found himself reaching to touch Gilbert more, without being
conscious of it. Gilbert wasn't complaining, but Matthew had noted the change
and chalked it up to being a mate thing. They were being careful about his eyes
changing, but the touches weren't inherently sexual or even romantic…they just
were and it was comforting.
He and Alistair had gone to one of the non-silent practice areas after dinner
and had been there for a couple of hours. It had started off relatively
populated for a Friday evening, which was why Matthew had chosen it. By that
point, however, there was only one other small group of younger students
working quietly on the other side of the room and Matthew desperately needed to
leave before he did something regrettable.
Matthew sighed aloud. "Fine, but if I can't do it within three tries, I'm done,
okay? I'm really tired and kind of hungry."
Alistair blinked at him, nonplused. "Deal. But ye have ta actually try. And
here."
He reached turned to his satchel and pulled out something wrapped in a napkin.
When Matthew just stared at it, Alistair gestured impatiently. He reached out,
careful not to touch him, and took the…roll? Matthew unfolded the napkin and
saw one of the larger dinner rolls meticulously tucked into the paper, he
blinked back up at Alistair, surprised. "Oh. Thank you."
Alistair looked pleased with himself before he shifted his eyes towards the
table, a hint of color coming to his cheeks. "It's nothing. Ye've been eatin'
more, so I figured I'd take somethin' just in case ye got peckish."
"It still was really thoughtful of you," Matthew said quietly, taking in the
rare opportunity to look at Alistair without him looking back. He was handsome,
that was certainly true, but in a way that was different from Gilbert. Gilbert
was growing into stark masculinity while Alistair was more angular. Matthew
only ever thought to describe Gilbert as pretty when he blushed but there was
something sharper about the other Slytherin boy, that was both delicate and
lethal. Stunning, Matthew thought in the privacy in his mind. He didn't have
the vocabulary to adequately describe him any other way.
Alistair huffed. "Jus' eat it, will ye?" The words were blunt, but his tone was
fond. Matthew smiled and began eating the roll. "At least ye'll no longer be
able ta say I was starvin' ye. But if yer really tired, we can stop noo."
"No," Matthew said between bites. "It's okay. I'll try three times, like I said
I would. Give me a minute."
Matthew finished about half of the roll before setting it down on the table. He
pointed his wand at it and Alistair said, "Mattie, yer supposed ta bring back
tha mouse."
Matthew looked at him with clear disbelief. "Alistair, I had to work my way up
to disappearing the mouse. Surely I'll have to work my way up to conjuring it
out of nothing. Plus, I'm a fifth-year, remember? I only know how to conjure
inanimate objects in theory right now."
Alistair stared at him before nodding. "Tha's fair. Go on, then."
Matthew sighed. "Okay." He noticed the other group of student's packing up and
his pulse increased at the sudden implications. Fuck. He needed to do as he
promised then get out of here. He focused once more on the space just above the
table and said, "Evanesco."
The bread instantly disappeared, requiring much less concentration than it took
with the mouse, thank god. Now came the hard part. Matthew took a deep breath,
imagined the bread he wanted to conjure, and firmly said, while pulling his
wand up slowly, "Inanimatus conjurus."
A smattering of what looked like bread crumbs appeared on the table, like
someone had rather messily eaten the bread without cleaning up after
themselves. Matthew was suddenly grateful for his insistence on bread; he
shuddered to think what would have appeared if it had been anything as
complicated (and alive) as a mouse.
Alistair hummed, considering. "I see yer point. Yer a bit off in how ye say it.
Yer not willin' somethin' away, Mattie. Yer coaxing somethin' into existence.
Ye almost have ta be gentle. This isn't somethin' ye can force. And fer this
one, yer holdin' yer wand wrong."
Alistair pulled his wand out of his robes and the last straggler of the other
group hurried after their friends. They were alone as Alistair brought up his
wand, pointed towards the door. Rather than grasping it in a fist like Matthew
had his, the wand was held by the tips of his thumb and middle finger.
Matthew imitated the position. Alistair smiled at him and he couldn't help
internally basking in the rare expression. "Aye, like that. Try again."
He nodded then centered himself once more. Pointing his wand, he said, damn
near cooing, "Inanimatus conjurus."
A solid, round shape that seemed like a small, whole version of the roll he had
vanished appeared on the table on top of the napkin. Matthew looked at
Alistair, startled but excited. "I did it!"
His response was to twist his mouth wryly. "Almost. Touch it." Matthew reached
down and frowned when it felt like he was touching a cold rock. He tried to
squeeze it, but it was too hard. Alistair came closer to him. "It takes
practice ta get tha textures right, but this is good, Mattie. Really good."
"What did I do wrong?" Matthew asked, feeling discouraged.
"A little in tha way yer sayin' tha spell, a little in how yer movin'. Let me
show ye." Alistair's voice was a disconcerting cross between a sigh and a purr
as he said, "Inanimatus conjurus." His movement was sharper than Matthew's had
been, though his wrist was more relaxed, so the entire gesture was fluid. It
was confident, but wasn't anything other than what it needed to be for his
benefit. No flourish, just pure competence. Beside Matthew's rock was suddenly
a half-eaten dinner roll that looked like it could have come directly from the
Great Hall.
Matthew couldn't recall if he had ever seen Alistair do magic before. Sure, he
had helped with essays and giving pointers to Matthew's technique, but had he
ever actually performed magic for him before? He didn't think so and he found
himself thinking, holy shit!
"Um, wow." Matthew said, voice more unsteady than was really appropriate. It
was a dinner roll, for Pete's sake! "Uh, I don't think I can do that."
He got an askance look at the confession. "Sure ye can. Ye just have ta relax
yer wrist a little. Here." Alistair automatically reached towards his hand and
touched his wrist. As his fingers lightly slid across his inner wrist to
position his arm, a jolt of awareness went through Matthew and his breath froze
in his chest. He tensed as his skin literally tingled at the contact and he
felt his face heat suddenly. This, this lust that he felt over such simple
contact was why he didn't allow himself to touch Alistair. Even this too
innocent touch was dangerous. It was shattering. It was—
"My God." Alistair all but breathed from where he stood, hand still on
Matthew's wrist and it was then that Matthew realized that the blur in his
vision wasn't from the blinding desire but from the fact his eyes had changed.
Matthew's eyes met Alistair's over the rim of his glasses and, shocked, all he
could think to say was, "Fuck."
===============================================================================
Gilbert had outlined his essay to his satisfaction Friday night in the library.
He had about an hour left until curfew, but he headed back to the Dungeon to
settle in for the night. He strolled through the castle, having to take a
slight detour when the staircases changed halfway down a flight of stairs, but
it was fine. He never minded walking and the halls were pretty quiet
considering he was walking past the study areas. Few people would want to study
so late on a Friday anyway and—
"I did it!"
Gilbert smiled at the familiar, excited voice. Matthew, of course. He sped his
steps a bit to reach the study area up ahead a bit faster when he heard
another, just as familiar voice.
"Almost. Touch it." He froze at Alistair's words. He remembered that they were
supposed to be working on the vanishingspell from lunch, so what exactly was
happening here? Alistair continued, "It takes practice ta get tha textures
right, but this is good, Mattie. Really good."
Gilbert couldn't help but move closer to the entrance of the area they were
studying in, feet light on the floor and hand holding his bag tight and away
from his body. Matthew's voice was small as he asked, "What did I do wrong?"
Gilbert frowned at the tone, instinct rising to comfort him, to fix whatever
put that note of sadness in his voice. He resisted.
"A little in tha way yer sayin' tha spell, a little in how yer movin'. Let me
show ye." Gilbert had reached the edge of the area and only felt a little silly
as he peaked in on pair and the otherwise empty space. "Inanimatus conjurus."
Gilbert watched as his friend made a…half-eaten dinner roll appear on the table
besides what looked like a roll, but probably wasn't quite right if the earlier
conversation was anything to go by. He had to suppress a shudder at the way
Alistair spoke, too many memories conjured at that tone. Gilbert didn't know if
he had ever met anyone who was as sensual as his best friend was as he did
magic. Clearly, however, he wasn't the only one affected.
Matthew's expression showed his interest, though he quickly hid it away.
Alistair was standing close enough to definitely be in his personal space,
though neither of them seemed to notice, let alone move away. "Um, wow. Uh, I
don't think I can do that."
Alistair looked at Matthew sideways and his brow furrowed in a way that Gilbert
recognized as his confused what-do-ye-mean expression. He was a downright
genius at some things, but Alistair never seemed to grasp just how effecting it
could be to watch him be a wizard. "Sure ye can. Ye just have ta relax yer
wrist a little. Here."
Alistair grabbed his wrist and the second they made contact Matthew seemed to
gasp as he visibly stiffened. His eyes were unfocused, but between one blink
and the next they were ice-blue and glowing. He became flushed and his lips
were parted and Gilbert felt like his chest was being ripped open because he
thought that look was only for him and Matthew told him his eyes only changed
with things like pleasure or anger and it had taken only a touch from Alistair
to get his eyes to change like that and—
"My God." Gilbert looked at the fascinated expression on his best friend's face
and scowled. He wasn't shocked, he wasn't scared. No, he was interested. Did he
know about Matthew before this? Did Matthew tell him what he was?
Matthew blinked and looked at Alistair over his glasses with such blatant
hunger that Gilbert couldn't stand to be there anymore. "Fuck," he heard
Matthew say, voice at once rough and breathy with…something. Maybe lust, maybe
realization, maybe panic. Gilbert didn't know. He turned back the way he came
and took yet another alternative route to the Dungeon. He needed to not be
around either of them right that second. He wouldn't watch them betray him. He
refused to watch the two people he trusted most, cared for the most outside of
his family tear him apart.
He would deal with them later.
Chapter End Notes
     Inserted lyrics are from Run DMC/Aerosmith's "Walk this Way."
     Title is from The Goo Goo Dolls' "Iris." "And I'd give up forever to
     touch you, 'cause I know that you feel me somehow. You're the closest
     to heaven that I'll ever be and I don't want to go home right now."
***** If It Feels Good, Tastes Good *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Alistair stared into Matthew's inhuman eyes for a long moment, frozen in place
and transfixed by the sight. Then he remembered that a Veela had just partially
transformed in front of him, which meant he was pissed, and a pissed-off Veela
was a bad thing to be around.
It was then that Alistair realized he was not only still touching him, but that
his hand had come to hold Matthew's arm securely. It took far more
concentration than was pretty for Alistair to force himself to let the other
boy go, but he did it. Raising his hands in front of him, he kept is eyes on
Matthew and backed away slowly.
When Alistair released him, Matthew blinked rapidly and looked away from him.
He braced himself on the table and took several deep breaths. When his
shoulders slumped in obvious relaxation, Alistair said, "I'm sorry, Mattie. I
didn't mean ta make ye angry with me."
Matthew's head snapped up and he stared at him, expression frozen on his face.
"What?"
"I said I didn't mean to anger ye. I just wanted ta help ye. I didn't even
realize I reached fer—"
"No, that's not what I…Oh. Oh, my God. You know?"
Matthew's human eyes widened and Alistair took an involuntary step towards him,
willing to do damn near anything to get that fearful look out of his eyes.
Gently (and quietly), he said, "That yer a Veela? Aye, I know. Figured it out
on Monday."
"You…you figured it out?" Matthew said, voice thin with panic. He almost
collapsed onto the bench, his knees giving out at the realization, and Alistair
was next to him in an instant. "You-you. How? God, is it that obvious? Am I
just that different that everyone will know I'm not human? That I—" His
breathing rate had increased substantially and his hands gripped the edge of
the bench. He was panicking, all because Alistair didn't know how to leave well
enough alone. God, why had he needed to know again?
He knelt down to try and catch Matthew's eye and then started whispering
frantically. "Shh, Matthew, no. No, it's not obvious if people had no reason ta
suspect. Please, calm down. I promise, this is not yer fault. Ye told Gilbert
ta not worry about yer invisibility problem and he asked me opinion on it
before ye told him it was inherited. When I found out it was, it wasn't hard to
make tha connection tha ye probably weren't entirely human, if at all. I went
ta tha library on Monday ta research Beings and figured it out. Tha's all,
Mattie. Ye did nothin', I swear."
Matthew had calmed a bit by the time he finished his explanation. He was quiet
for a long moment before he whispered, "Half. I'm half human."
"Okay." Alistair moved from his position on the floor to sit beside Matthew on
the bench. "I'm sorry I scared ye. I want ta help ye, when I can, not make ye
upset. If there's anythin' I can do, just let me know, alright?"
"Thank you. Thank you, thank you." Matthew said, relieved but still tense.
Alistair itched with the desire to touch him again, but he just clinched his
hands into fists and turned to stare at the wall.
"Of course, Mattie. Would ye…" Alistair cleared his throat as curiosity pushed
him to ask, "Would ye mind if I asked ye some questions? There wasn't much
information in tha library and…"
Matthew's back straightened and he rubbed his eyes briefly. "Yeah, sure. I'll,
um, I'll put a sound barrier up." He fixed his glasses, picked up his wand and
pointed it towards the ceiling. "Nonaudire protego totalum."
Alistair raised his eyebrows as a barely visible barrier formed just around
them. "Wha's this, Mattie? I've not seen ye do this before."
"Just something I came up with and I've never needed it with you." Matthew
shrugged and Alistair fought off a flinch at that last comment. He had
obviously used it with Gilbert before, probably for other reasons. He did his
best to let the jealousy go, because he so wasn't entitled to it. It was all
very much none of his business and the reminder of that knowledge tended to
foul his mood. Almost everything in Gilbert's life was open to Alistair, but
not this, not Matthew. He couldn't tell who he was more jealous of and that was
something of a shock to realize because he had loved Gilbert for long enough
that measuring time seemed like wasted effort but Matthew was…he was…
Anyway.
"Right. Er, so I'm assumin' yer keeping this a secret?" Matthew nodded. "But
Gilly knows, yeah?"
"Yes. He and Lovino are the only ones who know, barring the headmistress, the
hospital wing, and I think Hagrid. Well, actually, the ghosts probably know,
too."
Alistair raised his eyebrows at that but let it go. "Okay. I wasn't goin' ta
tell anyone. Tha' book I read wasn't exactly informative. Are ye goin' ta be
able ta change completely or…?"
"You mean, become a full harpy? No, Alistair, I can't do that. My eyes change
now, and later I'll have venom-coated fangs, maybe claws, I don't know. There's
a lot of things that are uncertain right now about what's happening to me."
Matthew ran a hand through his hair and seemed tired.
"Wait, ye couldn't always change yer eyes?" Alistair tipped his head to the
side in confusion. The book didn't mention anything about changes.
"Yep. Veela have this maturation process where they reach adulthood in one
year. I have a lesser version of it, meaning that the next year and change is
going to suck. My eyes didn't change until-until the process started." Matthew
said blushing.
Alistair narrowed his eyes at him. "When did tha process start?"
Matthew winced. "A week ago."
What happened a week—oh.He stared at him, putting two and two together. "You
mean, Gilbert. Gilbert started your maturation process." It wasn't a question,
but Matthew's burning face answered it for him. "Well, shite."
Matthew let out a nervous laugh. "That's, um, one way to put it."
"How?" The question came to his mind automatically, but he didn't mean to ask
it. "Shite, ye don't have ta answer that. Not me business."
Alistair watched as Matthew lowered his eyes as his blush flared and a hand
came up to cover the side of his neck, where Gilbert's love bite was just now
fading away. When he marked him, then. Neither of them said anything for a
beat, so Alistair continued, trying to be productive this time, "Wha' can I do
ta help ye?"
Matthew looked back up at him, frowning a little. "What do you mean?"
"I mean tha' fact tha' yer a Veela doesn't make me any less yer friend. If
there's somethin' ye need, I want ta know what ta do."
"Really?" His expression was too surprised to be anything but hurtful.
"Yes, Matthew, really."
"Oh, um. Thank you. I-I think you might be able to help me through a rage, if I
have one at school? I trust you and would never hurt you, so you might be able
to talk me down. Would-would you mind if I put you on my contact list? For
those kinds of emergencies?"
"Of course. Anythin' ye need. Though, yer goin' ta have ta tell me what pisses
ye off, Mattie." The bitterness of jealousy danced like ashes on his tongue and
he couldn't help saying, "Beyond me touchin' ye, obviously."
Matthew frowned at him, clearly confused. "What? You think I was angry? Why
would I be angry that…you…" A slow, dawning horror spread over his face and he
said, "Oh shit, oh fuck, my eyes changed when you touched me!"
"Aye…" Alistair said slowly, not understanding why this was new information to
him. "Can we go back ta ye not bein' angry about tha'?"
Matthew wasn't listening. "Fuck, fuck, this isn't poss—how could
that—you're not my—" His eyes were too wide and he brought his wand up quickly.
"Finite. I have to go. Right now. I ca-I can't-!"
"Matthew, wait." Alistair stepped in front of him as he turned to leave. "Look
at me and tell me wha's wrong."
When Matthew met his eyes, they were stricken and wet with unshed tears. His
hand reached up towards Alistair's face and he was shocked to find it shaking.
Matthew stopped just before he touched him and lowered his arm. "Everything,"
he whispered before he all but ran past the now frozen Alistair.
He stared after him and his mind tried to make sense of what just happened.
Then, it clicked and he felt like he had been slow.
Matthew's maturation process started when Gilbert marked him.
Matthew's eyes could glow starting from that moment.
He was likely not angry with him at the time.
Gilbert said that Matthew seemed hesitant to touch him immediately after his
date.
Since they talked, that did not seem to be the case, though Gilbert never
reached for his neck anymore.
Matthew's eyes started glowing the second Alistair touched him. Had stayed
glowing until he let go.
The book had said that Veela were quick to anger, that it would make them
change, lose all control of themselves. It did not mention any other emotion.
Would lust or pleasure be enough to change Matthew's eyes? Or would it take
something else, something deeper?
"Oh," Alistair said aloud, sitting on the bench once more, trying to think over
the emotions flooding through him. Matthew was right. Everything was wrong.
===============================================================================
God, please let Lovino be in our room, please let Lovino be in our room, please
let—
"Oh, thank God," Matthew said, flinging the door to his dorm room open. "Lovi!"
Lovino startled from where he was lounging on his bed, dressed in vibrant green
pajamas but clearly just killing time before sleep. He took one look at Matthew
and said, "Fuck."
Vash, who was already tucked into his bed, said, "I don't know what's going on,
but I'm not going anywhere. I need sleep and by God, I am getting some." Nate
was missing from the room, though Matthew thinks he remembered passing him in
the common room playing a game of chess against Lilli.
"Sorry, Vash—"
"I'm not fuckin' sorry."
"—we'll be quiet, I promise." Matthew hustled to the other side of the room and
quickly put up his silencing barrier. "I have a problem."
"Let me guess…" Lovino said looking him over. "It has something to do with the
Scottish bastard, right?"
"What? How did you—"
"I knew who you would be with after dinner. And, from your panicked look, I'm
guessing you two finally gave in to the choke-worthy tension and touched each
other? Enough that your eyes changed, right?"
"I-I didn't cheat on Gilbert! He was helping me with a spell and—"
"Uh-huh. I prepared for this inevitability. Sit the fuck down."
Matthew just stared at his friend for a moment before sitting on the edge of
his bed. How did Lovino—was he that obvious? Probably, but his eyes changing
wasn't possible! Not in that context, not for anyone but Gilbert! And—
"Shut up."
Matthew blinked at him. "What? I didn't say—"
"I could hear your mental run-around from here. Now, eat these. It will give
your mouth something to do while you fucking listen to me." Lovino held out
several of his favorite maple flavored cookies and Matthew took them. His
friend stared at him until he took a tentative bite then crossed his arms in
front of him.
"This, maple bastard, is a goddamn intervention. You're one of the three idiots
I care about in this fucking school and you're about to do something stupid, so
I'm going to try and stop this bullshit before it goes too far. I need you to
get four words through your head: Alistair. Is. Your. Mate."
Matthew opened his mouth to deny it but Lovino cut him off. "You better fucking
be opening your mouth to put a cookie in it or so help me God." The glare that
accompanied that statement got Matthew to stuff an entire cookie in his mouth.
It was comforting, in a way.
"Good. Now, I give less than no fucks about what your mother says when she
eventually gets back to you. You have two mates, who happen to be best friends.
And who also happen to be the friends with benefits kind of best friends. This
works in your favor. Gilbert and Alistair. Are. Both. Yours. It is past fucking
time you accepted this reality so we could start working with it instead of
fighting it so goddamn hard for no goddamn reason. Are we good?"
When Matthew went to answer, Lovino put up his hand. "Eent, rhetorical question
because the only fucking acceptable response is, yes, I understand, Lovi. Next
issue: how you're going to make this work. I concede that I was wrong a few
weeks ago when I scoffed at your fears of Gilbert wanting Alistair." Matthew
gestured emphatically, trying to telegraph, SEE! "Yeah, yeah. My bad. Listen,
this just means that you're going to talk to both of them, like a goddamn
adult, and convince them to start a three-way relationship. They will go for it
because if fate really gave you two fucking mates, who were friends, then I'm
damn sure it meant for this to work."
Matthew had a lot to say in response, but he had learned to wait for Lovino's
go-ahead. Plus, he had just finished the cookies and was in a slightly better
mood because of it. "Oh, yeah, you can speak now. Feel free to thank me for
saving you a shitload of time and unnecessary angst."
"Alistair's not my mate."
"Did we not already get past this? 'Cause I thought we were past this."
"No, Lovi, listen. I knew when Gilbert marked me what he was. It was like a
soul deep acknowledgement that I was his and I lost control of myself, okay?
The part of my brain that does not think like a human took over and I would
have done anything to make sure he didn't stop touching me in that moment.
Anything."
Lovino's eyes widened at that and he had the beginnings of anger on his face.
Matthew had never told him that before, but now it seemed pertinent. "Did that
bastard push you to—"
"No, no. I would have consented in any case and Gilbert was a gentleman, I
promise, but that's not the issue here. There was no question that Gil's my
mate. I can't say the same for Alistair." The lack of resonance from the touch
alone hadn't really hit him until he had been heading back to the dorm room due
to panic, but that didn't make it any less true.
Lovino frowned at him. "I thought your eyes only changed from sexy things with
your mates."
The plural grated but Matthew decided to let it go. He had to pick his battles.
"I thought so, too, but clearly not." He flopped back on his bed and stared up
at the canopy. He didn't quite know what to do with the information and had no
idea what it meant. "And will you please stop insinuating that I did something
nefarious? He touched my arm, for heaven's sake. Hardly peep-show worthy," He
grumbled.
Lovino poked his side. "One, if you lost control because he touched your arm,
you need to get laid—"
"Hey!"
"—which does not bode well for your libido after your birthday. I mean if
you're this desperate now—" Lovino's tone was only half serious, meaning he was
at least partially teasing. He did have a good point, however, one that Matthew
decided was a problem for Future Matthew.
"Fuck you."
"No, thanks. You've reached your quota at two hot guys." Matthew grabbed his
pillow and swung it at his friend, but he was smiling as he did it. "Two,
Gilbert had to do a hell of a lot more than that for you to know he was your
mate, right?"
"…Yes." Lovino had a point but... "Lovi, listen. I would love to have them both
be my mates. Hell, I would be over the moon if I could just date them both
without fucking over what I have with Gilbert. But you need to understand that
both of those options, especially the first one, goes against all the history
I've ever heard about mates. As a kid, mom would tell us stories about Veela
finding their mates, the one person in the entire world you can wholly be
yourself with, the one person to love and protect unconditionally, knowing that
they would do anything for you in return. A mate is the one person who carries
your home with them, the one you share your soul with. To have two mates…it's
completely counterintuitive."
"That doesn't fuckin' mean it's not possible! Just that it might not have ever
been done before. Maple bastard—" Lovino interrupted himself and took a deep
breath. His voice was gentle as he continued. "Mattie, there has to be a first
time for everything. Why not this?"
When Matthew just stared at him for a bit, Lovino sighed and shook his head.
"You know what? Just think about it. Come back and talk to me when you're ready
to accept that you have two mates and I'll help you figure out a way to talk to
them both. Now, take down this fucking spell before you pass out."
"Lovi?"
"What?"
"Thank you." Matthew said, raising his wand to end the spell.
"Yeah, well, what are friends for besides making sure friends don't pull some
mutual pinning bullshit?" Lovino grumbled at him, though the blush on his face
said he appreciated the gratitude.
Matthew got ready for bed, tired but his mind spinning. He had a lot to think
about. He just hoped his mother came back with some answers soon, hopefully
with a comment about how it was normal to want other people after finding your
mate.
===============================================================================
It was just past curfew when Alistair walked into their dorm room and Gilbert
was ready for him.
"Alistair," he said, voice cold enough to draw startled looks not only from the
Scot but also Francis and Antonio who were doing some reading on their beds.
"Gilbert," he said, eyes wary but he continued toward his section of the room
to set his bag down. "Wha's wrong?"
"We need to talk. About Matthew." Alistair visibly flinched and Gilbert felt
the anger that had banked in the time since he left them alone come roaring
back. He clinched is jaw and looked at Francis and Antonio, who seemed shocked
beyond belief that this was happening. They had never seen Gilbert and Alistair
fight and that wasn't about to change now. "You guys mind? We need the room."
Francis widened his eyes but got up quickly. "Of course. We'll leave you to
your…privacy." Antonio made a noise of protest but Francis all but hauled him
out of the room with a significant look. Alistair hadn't moved from where he
was staring at Gilbert across the room. When the door was shut behind their two
friends, the redhead fluidly raised his wand and gestured pointedly towards the
door. A silver bolt of light hit it and made the entrance glow for a moment
before it looked normal once more. With that he put his wand down away and
crossed his arms.
"Wha' about Mattie?"
The familiarity of the moniker rankled. "Don't call him that, not right now,
not in front of me. And what was that?"
Alistair's eyes tightened in clear rage for a moment before he seemed to let
that go. He moved forward and leaned against his bed post, looking all too
inappropriately relaxed. "A little spell ta make sure there were no ears ta tha
door. An' I can call him wha' I want, thanks. He's me mate and tha's what he
asked me ta call him. Ye don't get a say in tha'."
"Bullshit. Bull. Shit. You're my best friend, or supposed to be. And he's—"
"Wha' tha feck is tha' supposed ta mean?" Alistair interrupted, looking tenser
and on his way back to being angry. Good, Gilbert thought. He hated being the
only person out of control in a fight. It just made him feel silly and his
anger was fucking justified.
"It means I don't know what to think because best friends sure as shit don't
steal each other's boyfriends!"
"I didn't steal Mattie! I haven't done shite ta earn tha' and ye need ta take
it back, Gil." Alistair straightened his posture and lowered his arms, though
his hands were now clinched into fists.
"Why should I? I saw you together earlier, Alistair. You made his eyes glow!
You think that just happens?"
"How would ye…ye were spyin' on us? Do ye really trust me tha' little? Trust
Mattie tha' little?"
Gilbert moved closer to him and spat out, "I didn't even have to spy! I was
just walking back to the Dungeon and I saw you two!"
"And just what did ye see, Gilbert?" Alistair said, voice low with a warning
that Gilbert ignored.
"You touched him and his eyes glowed in pleasure for you. That's what I saw!"
"And after tha'? What did ye see then?"
Gilbert blinked at the question, not willing to get derailed. "Do you really
think I would stay to watch half of the people I care about the most in the
world betray me? You think I wanted a front row seat to my boyfriend cheating
on me with my best friend? No! I fucking left when I saw him look at you. I
didn't want to see what happened next."
"Well, maybe ye should have," Alistair growled out and started advancing on
Gilbert. Gilbert held his ground, but it was a near thing. "Because tha boy yer
accusin' of cheatin' on ye? Damn near had a panic attack after tha'."
That stopped him cold. "What?"
"He. Panicked. I had ta talk him down because I touched his wrist, which, by
tha way, is not exactly a come on. I was helpin' him wit a spell, for feck's
sake. Wha' about any of tha' screams me stealin' 'em from ye?"
"You think it was just you touching him after you promised me you wouldn't? You
think it has nothing to do with how you look at him, how close you stand to
him, how you treat him? You said, 'I won't lay a finger on him.' My mistake for
believing you!"
"Expectin' me ta be serious about tha' is feckin' insane, Gilbert! He's me
friend! Do ye ever not go a day without at least brushin' against Francis and
Tonio?"
"That's not the fucking point."
"Then wha' is?!"
"You wanthim!"
"Tha's not new, Gilbert, so wha' tha feck does tha' matter?"
"Because he wants you back!"
"And he loves you!" Both of them froze at Alistair's exclamation, mere inches
from each other at that point. After a moment, the anger on Alistair's face
visibly crumpled and he looked so…so hurt that Gilbert couldn't help reaching
for him. Alistair dodged out of his reach and started laughing. It was low,
humorless, and grew with every passing second, to the point of understated
hysteria. It ended abruptly with a broken sob and then silence as Alistair
turned from him and rubbed a hand across his face. "Tha' goddamn irony..." he
mumbled low enough that Gilbert probably hadn't been meant to hear him.
Gilbert had neverseen Alistair do this and fear edged past his anger.
"Scottie…" he started, gently.
"What, Gilbert? Wha' do ye want?" His voice was strong but…weary.
"Are you okay?"
Alistair let out a harsh scoff and turned towards him to say, "Wha' do ye
think? I come home from makin' someone I care about literally panic from a
touch ta have me best friend, me best friend, Gilbert, accuse me of betrayin'
him when I did nothin' ta deserve it." A smile that was just shy of a snarl
crossed his face and he moved further towards his bed, away from Gilbert. He
added quietly, "Makes me want ta deserve it, it does."
He inhaled sharply and couldn't stop himself from asking, "Do you love him?" Do
you want him more than me? Do you care for him more than you ever did for me?
"Och, feck off." Alistair started putting some books and parchments in his bag.
"It's a fair question!"
"And tha' was a fair answer!" He picked up his bag and stated heading for the
door. Gilbert followed after him.
"Where are you going?"
"Away from ye! Don't follow me, either!"
"Scottie—" Gilbert grabbed his shoulder to stop him and Alistair turned around
in a quick fluid movement, putting them a hairsbreadth away from each other.
"No, Gilbert. I've dealt with more than me share of shite today and I'm done.
Yer still me best mate an' I still…care about ye, but I can't be around ye
right noo. I might do somethin' we would both regret."
"Like what?" Alistair's eyes flicked over his face before he shook his head and
turned back towards the door. Gilbert continued, "What about Matthew?"
Voice bitingly bitter, he said, "Don't ye worry about me an' Mattie. Trust me,
I'm used ta not gettin' wha' I want. I have it down ta a feckin' science." With
that, Alistair waved his wand, removing the spell on the door and left.
In the quiet of the room, Gilbert found himself at a loss for what to do. The
anger was still there, of course, but he also felt helpless. What did Alistair
mean by that, that he was used to not getting what he wanted? And why did
Matthew panic after Alistair touched him? He was probably okay now, otherwise
Gilbert doubted that Alistair would have left him, but what caused it? And
Alistair was taking the news that Matthew wasn't human really well. Did he know
before he touched him? Had Matthew trusted him with that part of himself before
he lost control?
Was this some side effect of dating a Veela, turning against his best friend in
jealousy?
Was it worth it? Was Matthew worth this?
Yes, his heart cried, even as it ached with the tension between him and
Alistair. It had never learned how to let him go.
Should he even confront Matthew over this?
Yes, his rage hissed. Against his better judgment, he listened.
===============================================================================
His parents were just as comforting as expected, meaning only marginally so.
The letter arrived early the morning after his talk with Lovino and Matthew
thought of its contents as he wandered a little aimlessly outside, enjoying the
rare sunny day along with half of the student body.
For his more general questions, his mother had been helpful, clearly ecstatic
that he had found his mate so soon. On the issue of breaking the news to
Gilbert, she suggested reading the situation based on what he knew about him,
waiting until after his birthday if he thought it was best. Apparently, she
trusted his judgment…though she again cautioned about explaining the finality
of it all. She said that Gilbert would be able to choose whether not to bond
with him, that he was not necessarily fated to choose him, though she couldn't
think of a reason he wouldn't. She also didn't think the fact that he was half
Veela would change what the bond was to its core or affect the strength of it.
As for internalizing rages…Matthew's mother was not prone to large emotional
gestures, having had centuries to perfect her emotional control. He never
doubted she loved her family fiercely as her displays of affection were obvious
and consistent, but carefully measured, particularly in public. However, her
tone came across as highly alarmed at the idea of Matthew turning his rages
against himself. Please, my child,she had written, if you have a target for
your rage other than yourself, do not stop yourself from expressing it if there
is no one else around to help calm you. Rages against other targets are easy to
end. Rages against oneself…you would need Gilbert with you to not seriously
injure yourself. I know you and your brother have worked hard to pass as fully
human, but it is not worth your health. Those who are worth knowing will not
care. Well, that had been comforting.
She also just told Matthew to break the news to his brother, who had little
choice in the matter. Since he and Gilbert were most likely a forever thing,
she had pointed out, he had better get used to seeing him around if each year's
Yule celebration was not going to be awkward. That was fair.
Finally, his mother was…confused as to why Matthew was asking about wanting
someone other than Gilbert. There was no censure in the note, just bafflement.
If Matthew had to guess, he would say that she didn't understand his question
because it was completely outside her realm of possibility that he would want
to actually be with someone other than one person that he was made for. Matthew
supposed that was fair, too, though it did make him want to pen another letter,
detailing that his eyes had changed from a light, innocent touch from Alistair
and ask what the bloody fuck was up with that…in a more respectful manner, of
course.
His father had written separately this time, too. He assured Matthew that
nothing really changed from the mate's perspective prior to claiming, though he
did note an ever-present desire to touch his mother. Honestly, he had written
and Matthew could almost hear the laughter in his tone, I was surprised Helena
allowed it. You know how independent she is and there I was, always asking to
just hold her hand. I did have a bit of a jealousy problem, but nothing
unreasonable. I think I hid it well.Next to this line was his mother's flowing
calligraphy, indicative of her education prior to the invention of ball-point
pens, saying, He did not, but I found it strangely endearing when I would not
have tolerated it from anyone else. It was nice knowing my mate wanted me to
himself.
As cute as the comment was probably meant to be (for any two people besides his
parents because—ew), that was not encouraging for bringing up the possibility
of a three-way relationship with Gilbert. It wasn't like he was settling; his
mate was certainly no consolation prize. Matthew was damned grateful that
Gilbert was his mate and would do his best to not jeopardize their future
together. Yet, none of that changed the very real fact that he still wanted
Alistair.
Even with everything going on, the first thing he did that morning was add
Alistair to the list of people that could help him in an emergency. That this
was his first thought in the morning was probably telling, but he didn't think
about it too hard.
Matthew shook his head and stared into the distance over the lake, mind
whirring and feet taking him back towards the castle entrance. He was about
fifty meters from the front door when he heard his name being shouted over a
distance.
"Matthew!" He turned with a smile to greet his boyfriend only to have it fade
into a slight frown as he caught sight of him. Gilbert didn't look happy as he
approached him from the direction of the forest, but he hadn't sounded angry
when he said his name either. What was wrong? Did Alistair tell him about last
night? Had they talked about him, specifically his biology? Shit. Matthew
hadn't explained to Alistair the bit about his eyes changing from pleasure, but
Gilbert knew. He shuddered at the thought of both of them knowing his
preoccupation with Alistair, having such concrete evidence of how much the boy
affected him. His cheeks heated with embarrassment. God, why hadn't he thought
about them talking over this sooner? They were best friends, had been for
years. How had he not considered this before, to emotionally prepare himself
for the embarrassment?
He was out of time to think anymore. Gilbert was in hearing range and he
greeted him, praying the Slytherin would dismiss his flush as overexertion.
"Hey, Gil. How are you?"
Matthew stepped forward and lifted his face in anticipation of a kiss, only to
blink in confusion when Gilbert shook his head. "Not great. We need to talk."
Matthew froze and he tried to keep the sudden panic off of his face. He knew
those words, everyone knew what they meant, in that tone: Gilbert was breaking
up with him.
Oh, God, his mate was breaking up with him. What had he done? It had to be
something that he'd done. Was it because of last night? Matthew hadn't even
done anything! No, no! He would not panic and fall into despair about this.
Gilbert wanted to talk, so they would talk. Matthew cleared his throat,
straightened his spine, and took a step back from Gilbert. He would not fall
apart. "What about?"
Gilbert glanced around and made a noise of frustration as he spotted the random
groups of people who had come outside to enjoy the weather. "Come with me." He
grabbed Matthew's hand and started pulling him around the castle, towards the
other side of the grounds. The action wasn't rough, but it wasn't gentle
either.
"What's going on?"
Matthew jogged forward and saw that his expression was now thunderous. Gilbert
glanced at him and said, voice strained and cold, "You tell me."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Matthew dug in his heals and Gilbert let go of
him once he started putting up resistance. This felt like an argument (not
goodbye, not yet, thank God, couples fight, it's fine), so Matthew stepped a
little to the side until that he was up against the castle wall where the
architecture curved to be less visible to a passerby.
"I saw you with Alistair yesterday is what that means."
Matthew stared at him for a second and clinched his jaw. First rule in fights:
never incriminate yourself if you don't have to. He hadn't done a damn thing
wrong yesterday beyond surprising the shit out of both himself and Alistair and
he was getting really tired of the insinuation to the contrary. "And? He's my
friend and he was helping me study. So what?"
Gilbert leaned forward and caged Matthew against the wall with his arms.
Matthew glared at him and lifted his chin, refusing to be intimidated and a
little angry that Gilbert was trying to, consciously or not. "I wouldn't have a
problem with it if you hadn't been staring at him like he was a stack of
pancakes. I know that expression, Matthew. The glowing eyes, the flushed
cheeks, the parted lips. You still say nothing happened?"
Gilbert had a right to be suspicious but Matthew didn't appreciate the
accusation. "I'm not cheating on you, Gilbert. You know I wouldn't."
"Do I?" The words were angry but his eyes showed how hurt he was. "Because I
thought I did but I also thought I could trust my best friend not to go after
my boyfriend. I dismissed the looks between you as friendly bonding, waved away
the jealousy I felt as irrational, and pretended that I didn't see how your
eyes lingered on him. But after yesterday, do you want to tell me that nothing
happened?"
It ached sharply to see that he was hurt, but not enough to let go of his
anger, not yet. "If you had watched us long enough yesterday, you would know
that he didn't touch me, nor I him, in any way that wasn't appropriate. He
touched my wrist, for fuck's sake. Alistair had no clue what was happening but,
believe me, nobody was more surprised than me that my eyes changed, alright? It
shouldn't even be possible." Matthew's voice was quiet by the end, trying to
convey his confusion. The longer he talked, the more his anger drained away. He
was not the aggrieved party here, not really.
Gilbert shook his head and straightened. "Alistair said the same thing, that he
didn't touch you more than that. Fine, I'll believe you for a second, but that
doesn't change the fact that you lost control of yourself, in public, from just
being around him. How the hell am I supposed to feel about that, Matthew?" His
voice wobbled at the end and he clinched his jaw before looking away from him.
"I'm sorry, Gilbert." And he was. He was sorry he hurt him, sorry that his
damned genetics was fucking with their relationship, sorry that he was coming
between the two friends. "I didn't think it would be a problem until it
suddenly was. I wasn't planning on acting on it. I'm with you. I plan to stay
with you unless you have something else in mind." That was true, too. Despite
what Lovino had said, he was having a difficult time reconciling all he knew
with all he wanted. He was too afraid of losing Gilbert to ask for more than he
had, aware of how lucky he was to have found his mate in the first place. His
initial instinct to panic at the start of this conversation made that
abundantly clear. No, he would just let sleeping dogs lie.
Gilbert looked back at him, first confused then considering but always hurt.
"You want him," he finally spat out, accusatory.
I want you both.
Matthew shook the impossible thought away and felt helpless. Instead of
lingering on what he could never have, he focused on the fact that he didn't
appreciate Gilbert's tone, especially considering the circumstances. "So do
you."
Gilbert reacted like he had been slapped and actually stepped away from him.
"What?"
"Don't act like you don't know exactly what I'm talking about. If my eyes
linger then yours stay attached. I know you two have been together. I know that
you still want to touch him because, as you've said, I recognize the look.
Hell, Gilbert, you guys share a room. I certainly don't command Alistair's
loyalty the same way you do. You could have been sleeping together this entire
time and I wouldn't have known!" Matthew had worked his way up to a true snit
by the time he had finished speaking and knew that his eyes had started glowing
with his ire. He closed his eyes and took several deep breaths before opening
his normal, human eyes to see Gilbert looking at him with fear that he was
trying to hide.
He's afraid of me. My mate's afraid of me. Matthew almost felt his soul snap
and something inside him began screaming at the realization. Sounding stricken,
he said, "You're afraid of me?"
Gilbert winced and reached towards him. "Matthew, I—"
Matthew flinched away from his hand, shaking his head and trying not to cry.
"Don't. Don't touch me." Gilbert dropped his hand and Matthew forced a harsh
laugh. "I trust you not to fuck him but you can't even trust me not to hurt
you."
"You already have." Gilbert snapped back, response automatic and all the more
cutting for it. Matthew sobbed audibly in his surprise before covering his
mouth.
"When? When did I—" Panic stopped his words and he shook his head, back and
forth, back and forth. No. I'm so careful, I could never hurt him,would never
hurt— The internal screams grew to shrieks and he couldn't do this, couldn't
deal with this.
Gilbert hastened to cover his tracks. He said, "Shit, I didn't mean to say
that. I—"
But you meant it. Matthew needed to be far away from Gilbert right then, as far
as possible away from the situation. He knew he should stay, be mature and try
to talk it out, to think, but he didn't have it in him. He needed to be away,
before he scared his mate further, before he hurt him again. He didn't hesitate
to push past him, avoiding his touch, and ran harder than he ever had before.
Matthew only distantly registered Gilbert calling out to him as he wiped his
eyes and fled into the castle. Feeling on edge, he made a bee-line to the
hospital wing. He was sad that Gilbert thought he would betray him, heartbroken
that he thought he would hurt him, and terrified that he screwed everything up.
But above all, at his very core, Matthew was angry.
He was angry that Gilbert didn't trust him when he hadn't done anything wrong.
He was angry that fate had put him in a situation where he came to care about
two wonderful young men but could only claim one. Because he did want both of
them, more than he could explain or rationalize even to himself. He was angry
that he was born like this. But mostly, he was angry at himself for so many
reasons: giving Gilbert cause to doubt him, wanting Alistair when he knows he
shouldn't, being more than half in love with them both, and for hurting the one
person he never should.
Matthew knew his control was fraying and he put his hands over his eyes. His
fingers, parted slightly so he could make out where he was going, shook
violently as he ran into the hospital wing. He didn't remember the journey, too
focused on not collapsing into the anger he felt consuming him, into what he
knew instinctively would be his first rage. He stumbled through the doors and
located the nurse at the desk. Breathing heavily, said, "I'm Matthew Williams.
I need containment immediately."
The young man's brown eyes widened and he stood quickly. "Oh. Uh, please follow
me. Will you last until we walk to the other side of the room?"
Matthew wasn't sure but he could probably handle himself with a clear end in
sight. He hissed, "Yes."
He was concentrated fully on walking without going off when the nurse said
gently, "My name is Joseph. Is there anything you can tell me about what
happened to cause this that will help? Do you want me to get anyone from your
list for you?"
"I'm angry at myself and only Lovino Vargas, as soon as possible, please." He
was losing it, but he would still be polite, dammit. His legs were shaking,
now, and his steps were unsteady, but he was moving forward, his head nearly
empty but for the pained and enraged shrieks in his mind. The sound had slowly
risen in frequency as he moved further from his mate, had far passed the sounds
of a human's throat.
"…Okay. I'm taking you to a room next to the matron's office. Madam Longbottom
sees us and will be in to check on you soon. Do you have any requests about
your containment?"
At any other point in time, Matthew would be nervous. Right then, as he heard a
door being unlocked and opened, he could only say, "There's going to be a sound
barrier?" He had to give physical voice to the keens, had to, or he would go
mad.
"…Yes."
"That's all." The words were all but a hiss, Matthew couldn't hold out for
another minute, he knew he would fail. He was losing himself and didn't have
enough left in him after he spoke to care.
"Okay, I'll leave you here then." Matthew had walked to the center of a room
with a small bedside table and a full-sized bed, standard for the hospital
wing. The door closed immediately behind him. He was alone and Matthew felt the
last vestiges of his control slip away. He had no target for his rage and his
knees finally gave out. He threw his glasses to the side, annoyed that they
blurred his vision, and opened his mouth to scream only clutch at his neck as
he felt his throat close for a moment.
His ability to breathe returned with a harsh gasp that ending in an ear-
splitting screech, too high and…chittering to be human. As pain flooded his
mouth he didn't stop screaming. Teeth formed where there were none before and
he felt the newly manifested fangs descend. Blood poured from his gums, almost
choking him, and he collapsed to his side as agony radiated from his mouth but
spread quickly throughout his body.
Matthew writhed, cried, and screamed as it felt like his body was attacking
itself and prayed in the small part of his consciousness that was still human,
that wasn't a being of rage and noise, that this wouldn't last long.
He didn't remember much of anything after that.
===============================================================================
Hours later, Lovino Vargas stood from where he had been perched on the edge of
a hospital bed with its sheets in through disarray. His best friend, Matthew
Williams, had finally passed out from a Veela rage that had been going for so
long that it had openly concerned the head healer of Hogwarts, Madam Hannah
Longbottom. When Lovino had arrived out of breath after receiving a rather
alarming summons to the clinic, Matthew had been on his back in the middle of
the private room, screeching. If he hadn't been so obviously in maddening pain,
Lovino may have been frightened at the sound or the flash of large, curved
fangs that he knew to be dangerously venomous. As it was, he was only terrified
that his friend had lied to him that day several weeks prior when he had
assured him that he wasn't dying.
Once Matthew had been made aware of his presence, he had stopped the continuous
screaming but had whimpered and twitched as he sobbed. It was only every few
minutes after that that the awful sound would claw its way out of his throat.
Lovino had been exceedingly grateful for the sound-dampening ear muffs Madam
Longbottom had provided.
Lovino had followed Matthew's near panicked directive that he not get close to
him. There was a point when his friend seemed to grow used to the pain enough
to speak at length, so Lovino had been forced to listen to Matthew berate
himself over and over again for what had happened with Alistair the day before
and his argument with Gilbert. By the time he had gotten his friend to get out
a coherent narrative about what had happened, he had been beyond pissed. Not at
Matthew, mostly, though he was upset that his fool of a friend was hurting
himself like this and refused to accept the possibility that he could maybe
have both of his mates if they just fuckingtalked to each other. No, he was
pissed at Alistair for creating this situation. He was fuckinglividat Gilbert
for not seeing what was right in front of him, making Matthew think he was
afraid of him, and causing this entire fucking episode. Matthew already had
shit self-esteem from living like he was invisible to everyone else; he didn't
need help hating himself. Hell, Lovino was probably the only one who saw how
deep Matthew's depression ran since his friend walked around with a soft smile
and ready "I'm fine, don't worry about me; I'm used to it." He had thought
Gilbert was helping until today.
But Lovino had just spent the last hour wiping at the sweat on Matthew's brow
with a damp cloth, his friend's body too weak to protest his closeness but
still conscious. In his feverish state, Matthew had confessed that he thought
himself an awful, subhumanthingfor making his mate afraid of him, for giving
his mate reason to doubt him, for wanting someone other than his mate. He
didn't understand how Alistair could possibly be his mate, too.
Madam Longbottom had expressed concern over his high fever and lack of
hydration, but Matthew reacted horribly to anyone approaching him with an IV or
giving him a recovery potion for the longest. Hell, he had fought against
anyone touching him, Lovino being the only person he allowed in his space
without snarling and even he had to avoid skin-to-skin contract. He hadn't
bitten anyone, but it was a near thing. It was only when he was too weak to do
anything but twitch in pain that they managed to get the needle in. Matthew
only sobbed quietly from then until he passed out.
Around the ten minute mark Lovino had decided that he was never,evergoing to
watch his friend tear himself apart like this over those two Slytherin boys
again. He wouldn't betray his confidence and straight out tell them they were
Matthew's mates (partially because he hadn't quite gotten Matthew to believe it
yet and it was his own fucking body that had told him), but hewas going to give
them aCome to Jesus talk. Two in as many days—he was really on a roll. They
were going to make this work and fix his friend or Lovino would see to it
personally that they were put in the ground.
With his anger clear on his face, Lovino walked out to address one of the
nurses on duty. "Tell Beilschmidt and Kirkland to get here. I'm not going to
let him go through this again."
Joseph met his gaze evenly and nodded, having seen enough of what happened to
be equally outraged and gather that the blame rested with them. "Happy you
asked. Do you want me to clean Mr. Williams up before they arrive?"
Lovino was tempted to let those two idiots see the entire effect of what they
had put Matthew through, but knew his friend would be mortified if either of
them saw him in such a state. "Yes, please. When they get here, you and
everyone else should know that Matthew hasn't told them about the mate bit and
was waiting. He would appreciate it if you kept them in the dark a while
longer. One last thing: I'm going to get them to fix him by asking him to bite
them. I think you know what that means. If you think it's a bad idea, tell me
now."
Joseph's eyes widened but he nodded and said, "Do what you must. I'll inform
Madam Longbottom." Then he went to complete his tasks. Lovino went to stand
outside the entrance to the hospital wing and began to wait.
===============================================================================
Alistair, confused at the summons, was walking to the hospital wing when he was
run into by someone running around the corner. Taken by surprise, he was unable
to correct himself and the pair of them fell hard to the stone floor. They
groaned at the impact but the person on top of him immediately scrambled to
continue on their way. To Alistair's shock, it was Gilbert who said hastily,
"Sorry, sorry," as he stood, not paying attention to Alistair in the least.
"Gilly? What's wrong?" Alistair asked, concerned at the near panic on Gilbert's
face. Yes, he and Gilbert had argued and Gilbert's lack of trust hurt him, but
something was wrong. He would put aside their momentary difference to make sure
he was all right.
Gilbert froze at the name and his eyes focused on him. "Scottie? Shit, I'm
sorry. I'm sorry for yesterday, too, and I need to talk to you but right now I
need to get to the hospital wing."
"What? Ye were summoned, too?" Alistair frowned.
Gilbert's eyes widened and any color he had on his face drained away. "Oh,
fuck. Come on." Gilbert grabbed his hand and pulled him up before dragging him
down the hall at a full run.
"Gilbert, what tha hell is wrong?" Alistair asked at the sudden movement.
"If you were summoned, too, then I was right and it's about Matthew."
"What?" Alistair exclaimed, running in earnest now. Gilbert was the faster of
them on foot, so he was still being partially dragged along. "What tha hell do
you mean, it's Matthew? Is he hurt?" The thought made a cold bolt of fear shoot
through him and he ran faster.
They both ignored the sounds of surprise as they ran past students and only
shouted hospital when told to slow down by teachers and portraits alike. "I
don't know. It can't be good," Gilbert panted out when he had the breath to do
so.
They turned the corner to the corridor leading to the hospital wing's main
entrance to find Lovino leaning at against the wall at the end of the hall,
arms crossed and head bowed. He heard them approaching and lifted his head to
reveal the most dangerous look Alistair had ever seen on him. His face was
tight with anger but his eyes were cold and uncompromising as he watched him
approach. He said, "Don't bother going in right now. He's unconscious and I
won't let you see him until I talk to both of you."
Gilbert and Alistair slowed to stop in front of him and Alistair hastily
withdrew his hand from Gilbert's, not wanting to give the wrong impression as
they both caught their breath. Lovino raised an eyebrow at him at the movement
than proceeded to stare them down. Alistair asked, indignant, "What do ye mean,
'let us see 'em?'"
Lovino's eyes shifted to him and Alistair knew he should be more cautious about
what he said right now. "Everyone that knows what's happening will be on my
side and you won't even get far enough in to see him if I don't allow it right
now. As far as they understand it, what has been happening for the past nearly
four hours is both of your faults. Trust me, the only person who would be happy
to see either one of you in there is currently passed out."
"What happened to him?" Gilbert asked, sounding hesitant and scared. Alistair
wasn't far behind.
Lovino's eyes shifted to Gilbert and Alistair could swear he saw a flash of
pure hatred in them. He snarled, "You did." Gilbert looked faint and Lovino
seemed to settle into the wall.
Voice low and controlled, a fact which was scaring Alistair more than the look
in his eye or the lack of cursing, Lovino said, "You two are going to listen to
me and pull your heads out of your asses so I don't have to spend another three
and a half hours watching my best friend, the kindest, sweetest person I know,
tear himself apart until he collapsed because you. So pay attention, because if
the need arises that I have to say this twice, I won't. I'll just kill you. If
you didn't both mean so much to him, we wouldn't even be talking. As it is, I
would curse both of you to hell and back if it wouldn't get a pissy but
dangerous fifth-year on my ass."
Call him crazy, but Alistair believed him. He felt a little sick to hear what
happened to Matthew, but wasn't quite understanding. Matthew had mentioned
rages, but he thought those were only against other people. To have that kind
of energy turned against himself…Alistair shuddered at the thought.
Lovino continued. "One: neither of you are ever going to fucking imply to
Matthew that you are afraid of him because you think he will hurt you. He told
you that he wouldn't hurt you, right?" They both nodded and Lovino made a
disgusted noise.
"Well, he lied. It's not that he won't hurt you, he can't. He is physically
incapable of hurting someone he is romantically attached to and, yes, that
means both of you. To imply that one of his kind would hurt their partner is,
from what I gathered from his confused sobbing, worse than calling them a
monster. To have their partner say it is probably akin to emotional torture and
if you ever do it again, Gilbert, I will fucking put you in the ground. Do you
understand me?"
Alistair's eyes widened with horror and he turned to see his friend look closer
to green than the ghost-white he was before. "Gilbert, what did ye do?"
Gilbert shook his head. Faintly, he said, "I never meant to…he didn't let me
explain—"
"Don't care. Don't fuck up again. Two: you are going to open your eyes and see
that all of you are basically in love with each other and just start dating."
Alistair stared at him in shock. "Don't fucking look at me like that, Alistair.
Half the school was waiting for you two to grow some balls and ask each other
out before Matthew came into the picture and the fact that you ran here holding
hands says something. Mattie never would have mentioned it, but he wants you
both so much he can't see straight. He's fucking terrified that you'll choose
each other because of your history and leave him out in the cold, so he
wouldn't have said a word. That kid is loyal to a fault and it was eating him
alive that he still wanted you when he had Gilbert. You both are going to end
this foolishness and start an three-way relationship the minute that idiot
wakes up. There will be no need for jealousy between you three because you all
belong to each other and I won't have to watch Matthew angst about it when he
thinks no one can see him which is often."
Alistair had been having difficulty finding enough air to breathe as Lovino
spoke and he stared at Gilbert who found the floor very interesting in that
moment. His heart was beating faster than was healthy and he tentatively felt
hope for them since Gilbert had approached him in the locker room weeks ago
about impressing a Hufflepuff boy. To think that he could actually be with
ever-unattainable Gilbert and Matthew, the boy who had come to light up his
days and politely worm his way into his heart…he didn't know how to process it.
"Three: I want to make it very clear that, because of how things have happened
between all of you, there are some things Matthew has been terrified to mention
about his heritage. Do not push him to tell you; you've put him through enough
stress as it is. It's not going to be easy to live like this and Matthew's
going to face a lot of shit once people figure out he's claimed both of you.
People don't remember him now, but something like this is going to draw
attention and you know it. We're not even going to mention how his brother's
going to take the news.
"Oh, about his brother: trust me when I say you need to stay the fuck away from
him. Matthew hasn't told him that he's dating either one of you because of
Alfred's prejudice, but I've been told that he suspects and is nothappy. If he
confronts Matthew about it, or worse confronts you, we're going to have a
really ugly fight on our hands and it will take both of you to calm him down
before he seriously hurts his shithead twin.
"Finally, there are a few things you're going to need to do when Matthew wakes
up. He's going to be weak and still partially transformed. His teeth are
different and so are his eyes. The IV is in, but he's still going to need to
eat and drink something. If you two have been blind, he's been as stubborn as a
fucking mule in listening to reason. He refused to let me call either one of
you during this whole fiasco despite the fact he knows you just being there
would have helped calm him. As such, you're going to need to convince him of
something. Ask him to bite you."
"Ye want us ta what? He said he was venomous."
Lovino looked at Alistair like he was missing something obvious. "And I told
you he lied. What part of physically cannot hurt you don't you understand? It
will sting for a moment, but his venom won't hurt either one of you as far as I
know. Matthew doesn't believe it and if it hurts, well, I was wrong and it will
hurt like hell. But I seriously doubt that it will and part of me resents that,
so you know I'm telling you the truth. Your reaction will convince Matthew of
something important faster than any other way and it will let you be together."
What? That made no sense. Why would the properties of Matthew's venom change
based on who he was emotionally attached to? And venom is venom, right? Poison?
"Okay, if Mattie's venom won't hurt us, then what will happen?"
Lovino turned his head to look at Gilbert. "You want to answer his question or
should I?"
No longer looking sick, Gilbert cleared his throat and said, "He didn't have
his fangs before, so I don't know from experience, but he said it would feel
good for me. Well, I guess us, now." Gilbert glanced over to meet his eyes
before looking away almost…shyly? He reached up to rub the back of his neck and
Alistair stared at him, astonished. Was he really going with this?
"…As touching a scene this is, I don't want to be around you two anymore, so
let's move this along. Yes, it will feel good. Did he not mention the acid part
for everyone else?" Both Gilbert and Alistair looked at him, horrified. What
the fuck? "…I guess not. Eh, but that's not your problem. Probably. Anyway, I'm
going to take you in. He's in a private room at the end of the wing with a
sound spell. You both are going to need to stay with him and I highly suggest
talking through your shit before he wakes up. Either Madam Longbottom or the
nurse, Joseph, will walk you through what needs to happen medically and what to
look out for. I'm going to leave you with him because I fucking expect you to
act like adults and fix him. Don't fuck this up."
Lovino turned and opened the door to the hospital wing, walking quickly into
the room without waiting for them. Alistair shared a glance with Gilbert before
following Lovino into the nearly empty hospital wing, only three beds near the
entrance occupied by students watching wide eyed as the trio headed to the
other side of the room. Visiting hours were over, so the only other people in
the room was a greying nurse at the front desk with a name tag that read Maria,
a male nurse that had to be Joseph, and Madam Longbottom. It was the latter who
approached them from her office door with a nod. "Gilbert, Alistair, happy you
could make it. Matthew's still unconscious and may be for a while yet.
Hopefully your presence will allow him to rest more easily and he'll wake up
sooner." What? Why would us being here help him?
Lovino paled. "He's still flinching?"
Serious brown eyes focused on him and a nervous hand tucked an errant lock of
blond hair back into her cap. "Yes. His fever's gone down now that we've been
able to treat him without interference, but his body's still fighting him. I've
honestly never seen anything like it. This way."
She led them behind a screen to a solid wooden door and opened it to reveal a
sparsely furnished room and an incredibly pale Matthew. His breathing seemed to
be labored, mouth open to flash four sizable fangs. There was a thin sheen of
sweat on his face and he had acquired dark circles under his eyes. His face
seemed to have thinned in the twenty-four hours Alistair hadn't seen him, like
he had aged a little and lost a worrying bit of weight, and there was the ghost
of a frown in his brow. He was lying on his back, an IV with what looked like
saline solution stuck into his left arm. He looked alarmingly ill and Alistair
felt like the wind had been knocked out of him at the sight. He had never
imagined that a rage would do this to him.
It was Gilbert who asked quietly, "Can we touch him or would that make it
worse?"
"You can try. There's nothing you could do that would make this worse,"
Longbottom said. They didn't need to be told twice. Alistair was closer, so he
climbed onto the bed and over to Matthew's far side to sit beside him and took
his hand. Gilbert took the other at the same time from his perch at the edge of
the bed and Matthew seemed to settle, his breathing calming and his brow
smoothing. "Good lord," the matron whispered.
"Why does he look aulder?" Alistair asked, not taking his eyes off Matthew.
"Because, physically, he is." Alistair's head shot up to stare at the healer
and she sighed. Lovino looked just as shocked at the news beside her. "I've
been in communication with his mother in order to ask more medically pertinent
questions than Miner—Headmistress McGonagall thought to ask since we found out
he would go through such an ordeal. The maturation process for full blooded
Veela makes them go from adolescents to fully grown adults in the span of a
year, a process that is obviously quite painful. Because Matthew is half human,
his process won't be as dramatic. But she never mentioned what would happen if
one of his rages lasted for hours like this and I think the prolonged exposure
to his Veela rage aged him. I would have knocked him out if his mother hadn't
specifically cautioned against it; something about it being postponed made it
ten-times worse. Lovino, that was why I was so insistent on the IV. I had a
hunch what was happening, seeing no possible other explanation for his body
reacting that way. After he wakes up, I'm going to have him drink a recovery
potion that is currently brewing to help quickly replace the several thousand
calories he just burned and ease the aches that must have set into his muscles.
Right now, I would place him physically at around sixteen. I don't think this
will effect what happenson his sixteenth birthday as I think that is more a
timing thing than a physiological one, but I honestly don't know for sure."
"So you're saying all this gets worse after his birthday?" Gilbert asked,
sounding shell-shocked.
"Simply put, yes." The three conscious boys stared at her opened mouthed for a
second until Lovino turned to stare at the bed with a glare.
"You two need to fix this. Madam Longbottom, I'm leaving. Could you please page
me if something goes wrong? And did Joseph say…?"
"Yes, no problem, Lovino. Thank you for staying with him."
Lovino huffed. "Where else would I be? That idiot clearly can't take care of
himself." He sent them one last pointed glare before leaving the room.
Madam Longbottom shook her head then turned to look at Gilbert and Alistair. "I
need you two to stay in contact with him as much as possible as I can see from
here how much more comfortable he is. As such, I will make sure you are both
excused from class until he's well. I'll be back in about an hour to deliver
the potion and take out his IV, but then I'll be off-duty. Maria and Maxwell
are on the evening shift, but will leave you alone unless there is a clear
problem. Now, I'm sure you have questions. What would you like to know?"
Where did they even start? Logistics? "Will he be able ta eat or drink
anythin'? Can we pick up some clothes? Should we leave ta get food?"
She smiled a little. "Very practical. Make a list of things you need and give
it to either Maria or Maxwell. Matthew should eat if he feels up to it and
should definitely stay hydrated. Just let either of the nurses on duty know and
they'll leave it outside the door for you. They'll understand that you need to
stay with him. Feel free to use the lavatories and wash rooms at the opposite
end of the wing."
"How can we make sure this never happens again?" Gilbert asked, voice as
serious as Alistair had ever heard it.
"You can't. But hopefully future rages will have a target other than himself
and your presence will help calm him so it doesn't get as bad. Both Lovino and
I suggested multiple times that we call you both here, but Matthew was adamant
that he didn't want to bother you."
"Bother us!" Gilbert and Alistair said at once, shocked and not in the least
happy.
It was Gilbert who said, "Either one of us would have been happy to come.
Fu—holy crap, nothing we were doing was worth him going through this if we
could have helped." Alistair nodded and Longbottom sighed again.
"We said so, but he insisted quite violently."
Alistair desperately wanted to know what Gilbert had said to Matthew to put him
in such a self-destructive state beyond being afraid of him, but that could
wait. "Is there anything we should not do?"
She blanked her face and said in a neutral tone. "You shouldn't be afraid of
him or even hint that you are. He was…quite upset about that." That didn't
sound like an understatement at all. Gilbert slouched and went back to looking
mournfully at Matthew. Longbottom looked at him pityingly before focusing on
Alistair. "I understand that he is different and it may be frightening if his
eyes change when he is angry, but he really is harmless to you as long as you
don't jerk away from him if he bites you. With curves in the teeth themselves,
pulling away could damage you more than the bite would alone. Do you have any
other questions?"
Why are we the only ones he won't harm? That his venom can't hurt?
"Wha' happens on his birthday?"
The healer hesitated for a moment and Alistair's gaze sharped for it. "His
maturation process was projected to start on his birthday, as his kind have all
major biological landmarks on those days. We were under the impression that
anything that occurred prior to his birthday would be preliminary at best,
though after today I'm not entirely sure that's correct. As such, we think he
will have increased difficulty controlling himself as he approaches seventeen
while aging rapidly." The words were carefully chosen and Alistair had the
feeling she left something out, something important. Then again, it was a
miracle she was sharing this information with them at all. That begged the
question as to why she was doing so. What made them so special that a healer
would share medical information with them, then leave them with her critical
patient? Did it have something to do with the venom question? "Anything else?"
Yes, but I don't want to push to the point you clam up. Maybe Gilly will know.
"No, thank ye, Madam Longbottom."
"No, thanks."
She looked between them and nodded. "Then I will leave you. This room is
effectively soundproofed due to the decibel level Matthew can scream at during
a rage and for the sake of keeping his and his brother's secret. As such, the
room is magically equipped with something like a panic button. If someone
shouts help or someone's vitals drop below what is reasonably healthy, then the
desk is notified and someone will come. I'll be back in about forty-five
minutes." With that, the healer left.
A deafening silence fell between the two friends and Alistair stared at him,
not knowing where to start. Gilbert didn't look up from Matthew until he took a
deep breath and returned the glance. "I'm sorry, Alistair. I shouldn't have
snapped at you yesterday. I should have trusted you, both of you. I know
Matthew doesn't have good control over himself yet and I never actually saw
much beyond his expression. I felt betrayed and jealous and look where it has
gotten us. I'm so sorry." He voice cracked and Alistair reached out to grab
Gilbert's hand where it clutched at Matthew's. Gilbert never cried, not unless
something had shaken him to his core, like the time when Ludwig had fallen and
been unconscious for three days or when he had received a P on his charms
O.W.L. and watched all his plans for the future slip away. He always rebuilt
himself and came back stronger, but Alistair hated it to see his friend (his
love) reach this low point. When the first tears appeared Alistair reached up
and wiped them away.
"I know an' I forgive ye. Ye had a right ta yer feelings. It's not as if I made
it easy on ye and I'm sorry about that. I had told meself that I just wanted to
know him better and be his friend and tha' I could ignore how drawn I was ta
him. But I swear ta ye, this is tha most I've ever touched Mattie. And ye were
right: I do want him."
Gilbert cleared his throat and seemed to will his tears to stop. "I think part
of the reason I was so upset is that he clearly wants you, too. But I…I was
jealous for more than just that, I can admit that now. I didn't want to lose
him, but I didn't want to lose you either." He hadn't looked away from him and
Alistair saw just how nervous he was to make that confession.
He felt his eyes widen and natural caution made him say, "As yer friend?"
"No. And I know it was selfish of me, to try and keep you both to myself, but,
God help me, that was exactly what I was doing."
"How long, Gilbert? How long have ye wanted me like this?" Alistair asked, half
afraid of the answer.
"Always," he said on a shaky exhale. "I was in denial at first, then terrified
that I would lose you as a friend if I pushed. I never thought you wanted me
back like that, beyond a best friend with occasional benefits, so I was fine
with it. You never looked at anyone with serious interest, so I was fine. Then
I introduced you to Matthew and I kinda lost it, afraid of losing you both to
each other. Matthew saw that I wanted you, too, and had said that my lack of
trust hurt all the more because he trusted me not to go to you when he wasn't
there."
Alistair dropped his hand from Gilbert's face and stared at him, opened mouthed
and torn. Part of him, a large part of him, wanted to shout at him for not
saying anything before now and complain about all the time they had lost when
they could have not been pining after each other. But, if they had been
together, he had no clue where that would have put Matthew. It could have meant
that Matthew never allowed himself to get close to them, that the addition
would have momentarily broken them apart, or that they would have decided as a
couple to widen their relationship to include Matthew at the start. He had no
way of know which and no way to even know that they would have lasted together
romantically long enough on their own to reach this point. Bottom line, the
path they had taken had gotten them here and his life was better for having
Matthew in it.
He had been quiet too long and Gilbert looked away from him, expression careful
and controlled in a way he only did when he was very hurt. Alistair said the
only thing that made sense. "I love ye and have fer a while. I would kiss ye
noo if Matthew knew about it, but I thought ye should know."
Gilbert had inhaled sharply and stared at him after the first three words. By
the end of it, he was grinning and shaking his head. "What took us so long? I
love you, too. And I'm well on my way to being in love with him."
Alistair couldn't have helped the grin if he had tried. He looked away and
laughed. "Happy we're on tha same page. Think Mattie will go for it? Tha three
of us, together?"
Gilbert looked at where both of them were holding Matthew's hands and how
Matthew looked much more peaceful than when they had walked in. "Yeah, I think
he will. All we have to do is get him to bite us."
"We're gonna need more than tha', Gilly. We need ta figure out how this is
gonna work so we can explain it to him. We need ta get the supplies and talk
about this before he wakes up."
There was a lot to talk about. Did they keep them a secret? Alistair was
leaning heavily towards no because he was far from ashamed but knew he would do
whatever made Matthew most comfortable. Lovino had a point earlier; people had
been expecting him and Gilbert to get together, but Matthew was a wild card.
Alistair wouldn't hesitate to admit that he and his friend had earned a
reputation as the love-'em-and-leave-'em type among all genders, so people
would be waiting for a chance to fill Matthew's spot when it became clear they
were in a relationship. Once they figured out it wasn't going to be available,
a veritable shit storm was going to start because people sucked and Matthew was
going to get the worst of it as the unknown factor. He had a kind soul and
people loved to target those they saw as weak. Matthew was far from it, but
people would make him prove it over and over. The entire thing was going to be
hell on his control.
As for the logistics of them dating, Alistair was leaning towards both group
and individual dates. He wasn't going to make a fuss of it, but Gilbert had
gotten far more alone time with Matthew and Alistair was eager to fill in the
gap. And, oh God, but one of the best things to come of this entire debacle was
that he would be able to touch Matthew now, to stop staying away from him. Even
just holding his hand like this was a relief from a phantom ache he had done a
damn fine job of ignoring.
As for him and Gilbert, they had a long history as friends and lovers but not
romantic partners, so that may either be a huge dynamic change or just them
carrying on like it was business as usual but with a lot more open affection.
Who the hell knew at this point?
Finding a place for their dates, well, that would be a problem. Privacy at this
school was like a needle in a fucking haystack for a couple and it would be
damn-near impossible for all three of them to find a place just for them with
so many people watching. From what happened with Gilbert early on, even the
damned ghosts would be watching them. Alistair mighthave a solution later but
right now…
"Hey, Gilly?"
"Yeah, Scottie?"
"Does tha Baron know ye fucked up yet?"
"Fuck."
…He was going to happily torture his almost-boyfriend/best friend with the fact
their house ghost was going to come after his dumb ass for making his other
almost-boyfriend cry. Yes, Alistair forgave his foolishness, but he sure as
shit wasn't going to let it pass unpunished.
===============================================================================
Rousing himself from the darkness that held his consciousness hostage seemed to
take forever. When he finally managed it, Matthew wished he hadn't and he
groaned aloud at the full-body ache he was currently experiencing. If it wasn't
utterly insane, he would swear that his boneswere in pain. He went to move and
noticed that his arm was being held down by something holding his hand. No,
someone was holding his hands, both of them. Matthew winced and tried to focus
on hearing whomever was talking and opening his eyes.
The part of him that wasn't human answered his question first. Mate, it
whispered in relief, apparently exhausted after the hell it had put his body
through. He opened his eyes and saw first green then crimson eyes staring down
at him with worry. A wild thought crossed his mind and he huffed out an amused,
"Christmas."
They looked between each other and Matthew's hearing decided to come back
online. After a moment, they looked back down and Alistair said, "Mattie, it's
almost May. Do ye think it's December?"
Matthew frowned up at him, confused. What a strange question. "No. Your
eyes—red and green. Pretty."
Alistair only looked more concerned if a little flattered. Matthew smiled at
him dopily for being cute before he winced. Looks like that hurt, too,
especially his lips. It felt as if they were cut on something sharp, like his
fangs.
Wait.
What?
He had FANGS?
His memory of everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours
crashed back into him and complete awareness flooded him. Panic ensued and he
scrambled to get away to the boy he couldn't have and the mate that was afraid
of him. His back hit a solid surface, the headboard of the bed he was on if he
had to guess, and his hands flew up to cover first his mouth then his entire
face. He cried out at the pain of moving and shook with it.
"Matthew, what's wrong?" Gilbert said, sounding startled, no frightened at the
sudden movement. He had scared his mate again. A pain that went soul deep shot
through him and Matthew started to cry.
Sobbing, he said, "Sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, I'm sorry, wouldn't hurt
you, I'm sosorry—"
He felt arms close around him and he was pulled into a body that smelled of
grass, smoke, and wood: Alistair. Matthew stiffened and stopped sobbing in
shock at the realization; he and Alistair never touched. "Shh, Mattie. He's not
afraid of ye, I promise. He's scared forye. We both know ye won't hurt us." He
felt him shift against him and Alistair continued speaking with a harder tone,
presumably to Gilbert, "If this is even closeta wha' Vargas saw—"
"Yeah, you don't have to tell me. I'm well aware how much I fucked up." Gilbert
snapped.
"Tha' wasn't what I was gonin' ta say, Gilly." Alistair said gently, arms
tightening around Matthew even as a hand moved soothingly against his back.
Matthew flinched before pulling away from him and said shakily, "Please don't
fight. It's my fault, I'm sorry."
"No, it's not," Gilbert said quietly and Matthew looked through his fingers to
see him move to sit beside him. "I should have trusted you when you said
nothing happened and when you said you wouldn't hurt me and I'm sorry I didn't.
I'm so sorry I put you through this, Matthew."
Matthew was staring at him, eyes wide and hands lowered to only cover his nose
and mouth, when Alistair spoke and he turned towards him. "And I'm sorry,
Mattie. I should have never put ye in this position."
Matthew looked between them, confused. They were both being a little too nice
about this after he had screwed up so royally. Then other things started to
strike him as odd, like the fact they were both sitting on the bed, that
Gilbert wasn't freaking out about Alistair touching him, that Alistair was
still touching him even after he pulled away, that Gilbert wasn't touching him
as he usually was, that they were there at all after he had
specificallyrequested they wouldn't come near him like this, and that they were
there in a darkened room that was only illuminated by a single torch. "What's
going on? Why are you both here?"
Gilbert and Alistair shared a glance and Gilbert tentatively reached up and
slowly brought Matthew's hands down from his face. Matthew let him because he
realized that he had no idea for how long they had been with him before he had
woken up and had surely seen his fangs. They each took one of his hands when
they had reached his lap. "Lovino brought us here after you had passed out. Can
you drink something? Longbottom made a potion to help you recover from your
rage and help with any body aches."
"…Yeah, I could take a potion. Wait, he called you both? What did he say?"
Fuck. It didn't seem like something Lovino would do, but what if he had told
them his insane theory that they were both his mates? He hadn't even explained
the concept to Gilbert and couldn't justify his feelings for Alistair in the
paradigm that he was made for Gilbert.
Gilbert didn't let go of him to reach towards the bedside table when Alistair
said nervously, "He, er. He pointed out tha' we have been goin' about this
wrong and have hurt ye in tha process. We need ta talk about a few things."
"Like wha—aaah!" Matthew shouted in pain as simultaneous muscle cramps suddenly
broke out along his back and legs.
"Matthew!"
"Here, Mattie, take this. She said it would help with the growing pains."
Growing pains?
Matthew let go of Gilbert to sip at the milky-blue liquid before cringing away
from the taste that he could only describe as a mix of earwax and old gym
socks. "Water," he said before taking a deep breath and chugging the potion
down to get it, and the spasms, over with.
Matthew breathed heavily as Gilbert switched the now empty but sizable potion
vial from him for a cup of water. Even as he drank, he felt the tightness of
his muscles ease and then disappear. He finished the glass and felt worlds
better. There was a lingering discomfort, a lot of which was from his clothes,
but no more pain. Magic was awesome. But, seriously, why were his clothes
feeling more snug than usual?
Alistair had a steadying hand on his back and Gilbert was staring at him,
concerned. Matthew cleared his throat and handed him glass back. "Thanks. I'm
okay, now." Alistair quietly sighed in relief next to him and Matthew's eyes
trailed from their intertwined hands up to his intensely focused gaze. Matthew
blinked at him and frowned in confusion before turning to look at Gilbert as
the other laced their fingers together with a soft smile. "No, actually I am
very confused. What the fuck is going on? Start with why you're both holding my
hands."
Gilbert and Alistair shared another glance that seemed to contain an entire
conversation before Gilbert sighed and said, "That's one of the things we
wanted to talk to you about, Birdie. Lovino said that we were all being stupid
and he was right, at least about me. We all like and care about each other a
lot and there's nothing to say we can't make it work."
"Gilly and I talked about it while we were waitin' fer ye to wake up. We want
ta try havin' us all date each other as a trio rather than a couple. There
would be no need fer jealousy or choosing between anyone. We would all be
together. Would ye be willing ta try something like that?"
Matthew stared at him then at both of them, shocked. "What?"
Gilbert said, "Would you like to date both of us? For all of us to date each
other?"
It sounded way too good to be true, but Matthew looked between them one last
time and saw that they were serious. Without thinking, Matthew's eyes settled
on Alistair and he all but breathed out, "Yes. More than anything, yes."
Alistair smiled at him and Gilbert who squeezed Matthew's hand as he smiled
back. Matthew looked between them once more and started to smile when he
remembered why he couldn't have Alistair in the first place beyond Gilbert's
initial resistance. He stared at Gilbert for a second before shutting down his
face and pulling away from both of them because he didn't know what the hell to
do. Matthew wanted them to be together and the fact that they asked him was a
miracle in and of itself. But could he really do that to Alistair, put him in a
relationship where he would watch what Matthew and Gilbert could do because of
fucking fate and be excluded? What would happen after the claiming process? Or
his sixteenth birthday where he only shared a dream with Gilbert but not their
third? How the hell would he explain that? Could he just infinitely ignore it,
never have Gilbert claim him and allow them to be together? This would make his
mate happy, right? But could he really do this to them?
Matthew climbed out of the bed as he thought, wincing as he went at the feel of
his clothes. What the hell?
"Liebling,what's wrong?"
"Where are ye goin'?"
Matthew swallowed and said, "I'm fine, just going to the washroom. Did
something happen to my clothes? They feel way too…" Matthew had stood and was
staring as he realized his jeans were now clearly too short for him and his t-
shirt had ridden up to expose just the barest strip of skin when it had ended
below the button of his pants before. His pants were also way too tight from
his knees up. Matthew looked up and noticed that the bed was farther down than
when he had come in here the first time. His clothes hadn't shrunk; he had
grown. Thank god someone had thought to take his shoes off. "Fucking Christ,
how long was I asleep!? Did I miss my O.W.L.s?"
"Only about four hours, Mattie. Ye weren't asleep fer months," Alistair said,
moving to sit beside Gilbert as his eyes raked over Matthew's frame.
"Longbottom said ye aged durin' tha prolonged rage and were physically
sixteen."
"I forgot you said it's still April, but four hours?" Shit. No wonder he had
been in pain. What the hell was in that potion?
"Yeah. Fuck, Mattie. I didn't realize you had grown that much. But are you sure
you're okay with this? With us?"
"Yeah. What's not to be okay with?" Matthew asked absently, heading to a small
pile of neatly folded clothes that had been hidden beside the nightstand and
not looking at Gilbert. "Shit, none of these are going to fit me, are they? The
shirt I can make work but not the pants. And I can't walk through the hospital
wing with these eyes, now can I?" He made a noise of frustration and ran a hand
through his now too-long hair.
"Try on me pajama trousers, Mattie. The blue ones. They'll still be too long,
but at least they won't hurt ta walk in." Matthew looked over to see Alistair
still watching him closely, head resting now on Gilbert's shoulder. Gilbert was
now also watching him and had an arm around Alistair's back, hand resting on
his thigh. God, they were beautiful together and for some reason they both
wanted him with them. He had to preserve this as long as possible, he decided
then and there. Even if it meant not claiming Gilbert on his seventeenth
birthday, Matthew had to make sure this lasted, fate (and himself) be damned.
Matthew smiled at them and it felt bittersweet. "Thanks, Alistair. I'll just
look through my fingers as I walk." He reached for the catch in his jeans and
looked away, blushing. He tried not to hesitate too much as he dropped his
jeans in front of his boyfriends (!) and pulled on the satin pajama bottoms,
ignoring the lingering discomfort. To take his mind off it, he concentrated on
retracting his fangs. When willing them away didn't work, he shrugged
internally and said, "Um, do you know what time it is? I'm super hungry."
"It's nine, Matthew." He paused in his search for, at the very least, a
toothbrush and toothpaste in the bedside table. He found some other things that
made him shut the drawer quickly as he looked away and blushed again. Matthew
now knew why both of them were allowed to stay with him. Alone. In a bed.
Fucking hell, I know it's one of the surest and fastest ways to end a rage but
really?!
"Wow. That's later than I expected." Both Alistair and Gilbert's eyes hardened
at that and Matthew turned away and tried to concentrate once more on
retracting his fangs. He felt a hand on his wrist and Alistair gently pulled
him back towards them.
He seemed to consider something before asking quietly, "What were ye thinking,
Mattie?"
"I was trying to retract my fangs. Apparently it's not as easy to do as it
sounds."
"Don't retract them yet, and I meant by refusing to call us here when ye were
ragin'. Why?"
Matthew's eyes automatically flicked to Gilbert. "I didn't want to bother
either one of you. I knew it would pass with time." He didn't lie but it wasn't
exactly the truth either. "Why don't you want me to retract my fangs?"
They all looked between each other as silence reigned. It was Gilbert who
finally said, "This conversation may take a while. Go do what you must. We'll
see about getting you food and fitting clothes. I'm pretty sure fresh
toiletries are in the washroom already." Matthew looked at him, nodded, and
then fled the room.
He came back with damp hair and the foul taste of the potion out of his mouth
twenty minutes later. The time away hadn't made him feel better about his
predicament and he now had the added bonus of being confused by his own
reflection. The differences in Matthew's body were slight but definitely
noticeable: several centimeters of growth, shoulders broader than before, the
increased edge to his face, the hint of increased muscle mass, and, oh yeah,
fangs, not to even mention what was going on in his pants. No wonder Gilbert
and Alistair had been staring at him.
Despite Alistair's request, Matthew had tried for several minutes to get the
new dentistry to disappear to no avail. While the bad taste in his mouth was
reason enough to hold off on kissing the boy until now, there was the added
bonus of being terrified to cut him on the sharp fangs. The last thing he
wanted to do was hurt him and basically injecting acid into his bloodstream
sounded like the worst idea possible. But how could he explain why he could
bite Gilbert but not Alistair? And who the fuck knew what Lovino had told them?
Matthew smiled at the two of them as he shut the door behind him. He had
already been acting like something was wrong and if he wanted to keep the mate
thing under wraps then he had to cheer up. He had two boyfriends, for fuck's
sake, and they were the hottest guys in the school. They all cared about each
other and that was beyond amazing. Matthew had to stop worrying about the
future. "Hey, guys. Sorry I took so long, but I really wanted to shower and
stuff."
Alistair smirked at him from where he was lounging on his side in the bed.
Gilbert similarly turned his head to look at him, laying on his back with his
knee bent between them, and smiled. He pushed himself to be sitting against the
headboard and said, "No need to apologize, Mattie."
"Tha house-elves are going to be sendin' a food tray soon so we can eat. Come
on." Alistair beckoned Matthew to sit between them and sat to face both him and
Gilbert. Matthew climbed on but opted to sit facing both of them rather than
between them but still close enough to touch either of them. He had kind of
felt like he was watching a tennis match earlier and wanted to avoid it.
"Great. Thanks for doing that and, well, for staying with me. You both really
didn't have to." Matthew watched the smiles drain from their faces at the words
and he felt his heart sink as he looked down at his hands.
Serious and low, Alistair asked, "Mattie, what do ye remember from yer rage?"
Matthew cringed because the short answer was nothing good. "I remember fighting
to control myself to get here and then to stop screaming so I wouldn't hurt
Lovino's ears once he arrived. I remember feeling like I was choking for a
second and then a lot of blood when my fangs formed. The pain spread from my
mouth and multiplied. I was angry at myself. That's about it." There was more
to it than that, but he much preferred the fact that he had wanted both of them
with him, had actually craved their presence, but didn't feel like he deserved
their comfort or attention stayed his little secret.
"Do ye know how long it lasted?"
"No, not exactly. But I can guess based off the time now." Quiet followed and
Gilbert scooted forward. He gently pushed his chin upwards until they were eye-
to-eye.
"Matthew, it lasted nearly four hours. Why didn't you really let them come for
us? You have to know there's no place else we would rather be, especially if
you needed us. That no matter what, we would come for you."
I had no reason to know that. Matthew's eyes widened and he looked away. "I
handled it alright."
"No, leannan, ye didn't. Ye gave Longbottom a fright an' healers don't scare
easy. Please let us help ye next time. We don't want ye ta hurt yerself or be
sick. And don't try and tell me tha' we wouldn't help; ye calmed tha moment we
touched ye."
Matthew looked sharply up at Alistair in shock. "I did what?"
Gilbert said, "We touched you and you went from frowning and flinching in pain
to resting peacefully."
Jesus fuck, so much for subtlety. "Oh. I-I didn't realize you would have that
effect on me. I just thought you being here would be mildly calming. Not…that.
I'll let you be summoned next time, I promise." Please drop it now.
"…Mattie, ye still haven't said why ye didn't want us here today."
Fuck. "I-I didn't think you would want to be here, either of you. Since
yesterday, things have been strained and I didn't think you would want to be
near me, especially in the middle of it. I'm kinda surprised you can stand to
me near me now, haha." Matthew finished nervously, wincing to himself as he
stared at his hands, fidgeting in his lap. "Sorry, forget I said that."
"No. Matthew, look at me." He raised his head to find Gilbert's very close to
him. He inhaled sharply as Gilbert said, "I'm going to kiss you now."
Matthew nodded and Gilbert kissed him like he always did, with a barely
contained reckless passion and need. Matthew recognized the feeling and gasped
into the kiss as he ran a hand through his hair. The other was taken by
Alistair. Gilbert took advantage of the part in his lips to lick into his mouth
and along one of his upper fangs. Matthew turned his head towards Alistair and
broke the kiss, alarmed. Gilbert didn't seem to mind as he started to kiss
along his cheek and down his neck. "You can't—my fangs," he managed to whisper
after a moment. Gilbert grunted before biting him and forcing a sound from his
throat.
Then Alistair said, "My turn," and pulled him out of Gilbert's grasp. Matthew
went willingly, excited at the prospect of finally kissing him after all this
time even if it was going to have to be cut short. Alistair smirked at him as
Matthew leaned forward. He hesitated just before they touched and pulled back a
little to look at him, dark red hair in perpetual bedhead, lightly flushed
cheeks, and deep green eyes slowly being swallowed by black. Alistair seemed to
do the same as he brought a hand up to lightly touch Matthew's face and smiled.
Then he used the hand to gently pull Matthew forward to meet him and they
kissed for the first time.
Alistair's kiss was slow, controlled, and methodological. But rather than being
cold, it felt like he was learning the best ways to take Matthew apart with the
lightest touch. Rather than the wildfire that Gilbert's touch inspired,
Alistair made Matthew feel like he was in slowly heating water; deceptively
calm but with the potential to consume him just as much as any flame. It made
Matthew tremble, his heart race, and his breath shake and he had to pull away
to remind himself how to breathe. He rested his forehead on Alistair's shoulder
and very clearly thought, Fuck.
Gilbert laughed lowly and approached them. He felt Alistair lean one way and
Matthew lifted his head in time to watch them kiss each other. Alistair kissed
Gilbert differently than he kissed Matthew, bitingly aggressive to Gilbert's
sultry seduction. It had to be one of the hottest things Matthew had ever seen
and he watched, Alistair's hand still in his hair, with wide eyes and deep
breaths. There was strangely no jealousy, only lust, wonder, and affection.
When both of them broke away from the kiss out of breath, Gilbert looked at him
first and said, "Still think we're repulsed by you?" Matthew bit his lip and
shook his head. He opened his mouth to say something when there was a knock at
the door. Gilbert grinned at him before saying, "It's probably food. I'll get
it." He left the bed and Matthew felt Alistair's hand at his side.
"Come here, Mattie." Alistair's hand guided him to crawl into his lap to
straddle him before pulling him back down into a kiss. Matthew licked at his
mouth and Alistair's arms tightened around him with a sound, bringing them
closer. When Alistair tried to deepen the kiss, Matthew pulled away, clearly
reluctant as he shook his head.
"Alistair, I don't want to cut you," he said lowly against his mouth before
trailing his lips down to his throat. Alistair shuddered beneath him as he
moved and Matthew remembered the first time he had really seen him with a
smirk.
The smirk disappeared when Alistair asked, "Why not?"
Matthew froze and sat up to stare down at his genuinely curious eyes. "What?
You can't be serious."
Alistair lifted a brow at him and moved his hands down to squeeze his hips as
he said, "I am." He frowned and one of his hands ran slowly down his hip and
along the outside of this thigh. Matthew turned red even before he got out,
"Mattie, are ye not wearin' pants?"
"Uh. Um. Well, mine didn't quite…fit anymore." Matthew was a fan of boxer
briefs. They were already a little tight when he put them on that morning but
now…there's only so much cotton can comfortingly stretch.
Alistair stared up at him, silent as his cheeks colored and his eyes darkened
even more for a long moment pupils blown as wide as they could get. Gilbert
walked back over, extra clothes in hand and a large tray of food floating
behind him. Matthew looked up to see his bemused look. "Mattie, what did you do
to put that look on his face already? All your clothes are still on." Gilbert
laughed to himself.
"Uhh—"
"No, Gilly. Not all of 'em." Alistair's hands tightened on him and Matthew
glanced down at him to see a dangerously hungry look that both scared and
excited him.
"Wow! Okay. Um, food! You have food, right, Gilbert? I'm famished. From, you
know, apparently aging several months or something. You guys should eat, too.
You haven't eaten yet, right?"
Gilbert's eyes had gone to Alistair's hands on Matthew and had glazed over a
bit before shaking his head and clearing his throat. "No, we haven't. Scottie."
Alistair leaned in to kiss Matthew's neck and said quietly, "Later, then." He
then pulled away, released Matthew, and leaned back to look lazily at Gilbert.
"Gilly?"
"Don't give me that look. I know exactly what you were thinking." Gilbert put
the clothes with the others and climbed onto the bed to settle against the
headboard, the rather large tray coming to hover in front him with a stack of
empty plates, a jug of orange juice with glasses, and platters piled with fried
eggs, Canadian bacon, hash browns, beans, toast, and pancakes with real maple
syrup. Matthew's eyes widened and Gilbert said, "Birdie, if you want Scottie to
keep his hands to himself, you might want to get off of him with that look on
your face."
"Oh, sorry." Matthew looked away and climbed off of him and over to sit next to
Gilbert. He gave him a quick kiss, saying, "Thanks for getting the food,
angel." Then he turned away from him and focused on getting food. He really was
hungry.
"Aye, thanks, Gilly." Alistair reached for the food. Matthew sat back to dig in
when he saw Gilbert jokingly pout at Alistair. Oh, boy.
"What, no kiss? Mattie gave me a kiss."
"I'm not Mattie and ye know tha' does not work on me. 'Sides, I have plenty of
time ta kiss ye later."
Gilbert sighed and looked back at Matthew who was plowing through his plate of
food, barely paying them any attention. Damn, but this was good. He met
Gilbert's eyes then rolled his. "Just eat, Gil. I feel like I have my brother's
usual appetite right now, so you should get something before it's gone." To
make his point, Matthew took a big bite of his pancake and smiled closed-
mouthed.
Gilbert shrugged and made a plate. "That makes sense. Longbottom said that the
potion would help make up for all the energy you burned, not that it would do
all the work."
"And if yer growin' faster than usual, anyway. Yer metabolism prob'ly shot up
and tha's why ye've been eatin' more lately anyway."
Matthew made a noise of acknowledgement and thought for a moment. Shit,
Alfred's going to realize something happened the moment he saw him. Looks like
jig was up about him finding his mate. That was going to be fun conversation.
He poured a glass of orange juice as he said, "Guys, I need to talk to my
brother about us before you run into him. I'll make sure he doesn't harass you
over this, but I'm not sure he'll believe me the first time when I say not to
go after either one of you. I love him, but he's a bit of an idiot when it
comes to some things. I know you have a game coming up next week against
Gryffindor and I'll try to talk some sense into him before then."
Alistair shrugged. "From what Artie's told me, tha's damn near impossible. We
can handle him, Mattie. Don't worry about it."
Matthew stared at him. Alistair wasn't his mate, but he was damn fucking sure
that if someone threatened him, heads would roll. "Alistair, you don't
understand. He needs to leave you alone. I need him to leave you alone."
"Yeah, Scottie. I forgot to mention this before, but now that we're all dating
Matthew's going to lose it every time someone threatens or insults one of us.
We're the only hair trigger he has."
Gilbert and Matthew kept on eating while Alistair stared at him like they had
lost their minds. Matthew didn't blame him. "Yer feckin' with me, right?"
"Unfortunately, no. I'm sorry, Alistair. It's why I didn't go to your game last
week, because Gilbert would have been under constant threat in front of me and
I would have lost it. In all honesty, I wouldn't have been surprised if I had a
hair trigger about you even if we hadn't started seeing each other. Veela as a
whole are very…" dependent on fate? "…sensitive about what is said about or
done to people they're romantically attached to. With one, it's expected and
manageable. With two…hell. According to my mother, I shouldn't even want
someone other than Gilbert. I actually don't know how I can. It's not like I've
ever wanted anyone other than you two…" Matthew had been almost talking to
himself by the end of it, frowning. He hadn't felt wrong or guilty kissing
Alistair. No, it had felt right. And seeing Gilbert kiss him didn't spark
jealously or territorial possession, which was odd. Matthew had only seen one
woman flirt openly with his father once in his life with his mother there. Even
at a young age, not quite understanding what was happening, the look on his
mother's face made him fear for the woman. Was it that he was half human? Is
that what made him different, a Veela who wanted someone other than his mate?
Did it make him an abomination, a crime against nature?
"Matthew!" He startled and blinked up to see both Gilbert and Alistair looking
at him with concern.
"Sorry! Were you saying something?" Matthew cleared his throat and quickly
shoved some food in his mouth.
They glanced between each other and Alistair said, "It's fine, Matthew, I jus'
didn't realize. We'll make it work. Are ye feelin' alright?"
"Yeah, I'm fine," Matthew answered, his voice higher than usual and he fought
the urge to cringe. Yikes. That didn't sound like a lie at all. Shit.
"You want to try that one again?" Gilbert asked as he raised his eyebrows and
set his plate on the tray.
"Um, not really?"
They stared at him for a long second before Alistair said, "Mattie, is bein'
with me goin' ta make goin' home hard fer ye?"
Only because I can't explain you to a centuries old Veela who thinks my mate
should be the only person I want now that I've found him."Yes, but I knew that
before I agreed to this. Being with both of you is worth so much more than that
to me, even though it makes me abnormal to most Veela and, hell, most humans. I
can deal with them." And he could. He knew his parents loved him, it just might
take his mother a while to understand how fate didn't rule his life. He went
back to eating. "Will either of your families have a problem with this—with
us?"
Gilbert shook his head. "No, I don't think so. West is happy as long as I'm
happy, and Old Fritz is still a punk deep down and won't care. Mom and dad,
well…" He cringed. Gilbert and his brother had been living with his great uncle
in Britain since he was nine because his parents traveled so much, hence why he
went to Hogwarts rather than Durmstrang. "…I'm not even out to them. I don't
have a clue how they'll take it, honestly."
Alistair shrugged. "Me gran will be happy for me. I could not care less about
wha' tha rest will think."
Matthew made a non-committal noise before saying, "Hopefully it won't become a
problem."
"About that. Lovino mentioned that there were some things that you hadn't
explained to us—" Matthew started coughing, almost choking on his food.
"He-he said what?"
"—And that's fine! Scottie and I talked about it and we don't want to pressure
you into telling us things you aren't comfortable with as long as it doesn't
affect anyone's health or safety. Especially yours, considering where we are
right now. But we want you to know that we're here for you and hope you will
feel comfortable enough to explain at some point."
"Also, we need ta talk 'bout how this is gonna work. It's a feckin' miracle we
got this far an' I do not want ta screw it up from not talkin'."
Matthew helped himself to more food. "All right. What were you guys thinking?"
"Do ye want ta keep us a secret?"
"No. I have to tell Alfred and that dick couldn't keep a secret other than the
fact that we're half-Veela if he was paid to. Plus, it's going to be obvious if
I start losing it if someone says something about you to me and they need to
know you're not available. You're both mine and each other's. I can share
everything else in my life, but not you two."
"Agreed."
"Aye."
"We also talked about dating each other in pairs and as a group. Is that
alright with you?"
Matthew shrugged. "Sure. We'll keep a schedule or something, see how that works
out. Though I think that should be like a special thing. We'll hang out as
usual, right?"
"Of course. We're friends first before anything else. Do you have any ground
rules you want to throw out there?"
Matthew could only think of one, but it felt selfish of him to say it. Still,
he didn't want it to become a problem later, so he bit his lip (careful of his
fangs) and said, "Yes. I, um, I know you have slept together before…and that
you share a room. That's cool, but could you maybe not do stuff together that
you wouldn't do with me when you're alone?"
Alistair laughed and said with a smirk, "Ye might want ta rephrase tha',
leannan, 'cause there's not much I wouldn't do with ye."
"He has a point, Liebling."
Matthew was torn between oh God, yesand yikes. The former was winning out.
"Okay, haven'tdone with me yet when I'm not there."
"So, yer sayin' ye want ta watch, like when I first saw ye?"
Matthew's face turned red but he nodded all the same.
"Wait, what? What happened the first time you two saw each other?" Gilbert said
with a frown.
"Mattie did not tell ye? Ye were there, too. In fact, ye had me pressed against
a wall when Mattie stumbled upon us an' stayed ta watch after I had seen him.
Ran off not long after and I never figured out who it was until ye introduced
us."
"Is it true, Birdie? You've seen us together already?" Gilbert sounded
incredulous.
Matthew winced. "Yeah. Um, I had just started going on my night flights and
took a wrong turn coming back. I was startled and Alistair saw me immediately.
I was fascinated and I couldn't look away until he did. When I could, I ran."
Gilbert turned and started making faces at Alistair in what Matthew could
assume was a private conversation. It ended when Alistair smiled slowly at him
and Gilbert nodded. To Matthew he said, "One, you have a deal. Two, I'm damn
glad I didn't find out about that until right now."
Maple have mercy. Matthew wasn't hungry anymore, a miracle in and of itself.
"Great. Do you guys have anything you want to bring up?"
"Do you have anything you want to say about being a Veela that would affect
anyone's health, Matthew?"
Matthew thought hard. Beyond the mate thing (which was starting to feel like an
elephant in the room), Matthew thought he covered all the bases. He basically
knew didily-squat about what the next year and some change was going to be like
for him other than really fucking hard, especially after his birthday. What the
hell were they going to do when Gilbert and Alistair graduated? But that was so
far off, he shouldn't worry about it right now. "No. I don't know how much is
going to change after my birthday. I don't really know much at all about what's
going on. If I think of something, I'll let you both know."
"Tha's fair. Are ye done eatin'?"
"Yeah, why?"
"Because we have somethin' we want ta ask ye to do."
Matthew raised his eyebrows at them and put his plate on the tray mostly empty
of food. "And that is…?"
Gilbert got up and the tray followed him, only to float presumably back to the
kitchen when he opened the door briefly. Alistair waited for the door to close
again when he said, "We want ye to bite us."
"You want what? Alistair, I told you I was venomous. Why the fuck would you
want me to—Lovino. Of course. Fuck." For fuck's sake. It was one thing for him
to tell Matthew that he thought they were both his mates, it another to get
them to ask him this, knowing he would have to explain something about why he
didn't want to bite them. Matthew loved Lovino, really he did, and he was
eternally grateful he stayed with him and talked Gilbert and Alistair into a
three-way relationship. But if this ended up hurting one of them, which it
would, he was going to kick his ass.
It didn't help that the not so human part of his brain was all for it if the
sudden throbbing in his fangs meant what he thought it did. Matthew didn't know
what the hell was wrong with his Veela side since it was usually more rational
than his human half. Well, it was rational around everyone but these two,
apparently.
Gilbert and Alistair were staring at him. "Mattie, you told me that if you bit
me it would feel good. Lovino said it was true of all your romantic partners,
that you were incapable of hurting us. Why wouldn't you want to bite us?"
"Uh. Um. Shit. I need to pace if I'm going to explain this right now." Matthew
got up and started to walk back and forth in front of the bed as Gilbert and
Alistair moved to perch on the side of it. They stared at him as he walked and
Matthew suddenly wished that Alistair's pajama bottoms were thicker. Might as
well get this over with. "Okay, so my venom canbe pleasurable to someone I'm
involved with, but I was told that it could only be one person. I have no
control over who. I couldbe abnormal and have it work for both of you, which
would actually solve a lot of my problems. But then that creates a whole host
of other issues that I don't want to get into right now. Anyway, if I'm a
normal half Veela and I bite both of you, for one of you it will burn like
acid. I have no idea who since I haven't bitten Gilbert before, but I rather
not risk it. I don't want to hurt either one of you. It would kill me."
"Wait, literallykill you?"
"No, Gilbert. At least, I don't think so. 97% sure it wouldn't."
Gilbert stared at him in horror while Alistair looked contemplative. He said,
"But, Mattie, yer not normal. How many half-Veela can't be remembered by
folks?"
Matthew shook his head. "Just me, as far as I know."
"Why would ye have a typical Veela life in this, then?" Matthew just stared at
him, unable to come up with a good answer. "Exactly. An' if it will make yer
life easier, I say we give it a shot, yeah?"
God, I hope this is the right decision."Okay. But if it starts to burn, I need
you to tell me immediately to stop, alright? And you don't quite understand
what you're asking me to do."
Gilbert looked between the two of them and said, "Could you explain it?"
"Yeah. It's—wait. You two are human. Biting you both would be like you sharing
needles. I can't get sick like that; as far as I know, I'm immune to human
diseases. But for you—hell no. This is not—"
"I'm clean, Mattie," Alistair interrupted. "I got tested in December and
haven't been with anyone since."
"Me, too—wait. You haven't been with anyone?"
Alistair glared at him but blushed a little. "Tha's what I said."
"You hadn't been with anyone but me last semester before break."
Alistair looked away. "And?"
"That was for your birthday. In November! Are you telling me no one has touched
you in six months? Fucking hell, Scottie, why didn't you say anything?"
"Ye didn't seem too interested so I didn't bring it up an' I didn't want anyone
else," Alistair bit out, face flushed with more embarrassment than Matthew had
yet seem from him. "Ye were preoccupied and then ye met Mattie."
"Preoccupied with what!?"
"Ye think I can't tell when ye really like someone? I've been yer mate fer
years, Gilly. I recognize tha pattern an' have been right every time. Did ye
think I stopped fuckin' ye when ye met Eliza fer no good reason?"
"I thought you lost interest! That's what convinced me to pursue her!"
They glared at each other and Matthew gave them a moment to either look back at
him or start making out. Either worked for him, really. When nothing happened
for a count of thirty, Matthew tentatively asked, "Who was it, Gil? That you
were interested in, I mean."
Gilbert have a harsh huff of laughter before looking at him. "You, Matthew. It
was you."
"Oh." Shit. Now he felt bad. "Um, I take my rule back, then. I didn't realize
it—"
"Oh, no, Mattie. Yer not takin' tha' back fer me. I rather like it." Alistair
leered at him, making Matthew blush. "Noo tha' we cleared that up, tell us
about biting."
"Um. Right. I haven't been told much, but as far as I know, the only time a
full Veela partially transforms to have fangs like these rather than a beak is
when they're with their partner. I guess it can be used as foreplay, but it
seems like it's usually done during sex. The bite leaves a mark, but it's only
permanent if I bite very deep or during a bonding ritual. It's desi—"
"Wait, what's a bonding ritual?" Gilbert asked.
Shit. Shit shit shit shit shit. "Um, it's something that Veela and their
partners do, especially if their partner is human, to make them connected. It's
done with human…partners because they lack a metaphysical ability to connect
that Veela are born with. It's not possible to do until the Veela is either in
the very last stage of the maturation process or is already mature. It's
optional for humans. Anyway—"
"Wait, wha' do ye mean, optional fer humans? Wha' happens ta the Veela if it
does not happen?"
Fuck."For someone who's found a romantic partner before they're fully mature,
it means the last stage is very difficult for them."
"Difficult as in…?"
Matthew closed his eyes and said, "Incredibly painful. But, like I said, the
ritual can take place any time after the Veela reaches full maturity." Matthew
looked at them to see them wearing twin looks of shock. "As I was saying, the
venom is designed so that the partner does not suffer any lasting damage and
has the ability to stop the bleeding and heal them from the bite. That's about
everything I know."
Silence followed as they did nothing but look at him. Anxiety ran through him.
"Please say something."
"Matthew, is yer last stage on yer seventeenth birthday?"
Matthew looked away from his too steady gaze and said, "Yes."
"When were you going to tell us?"
"I honestly didn't think of it earlier. I don't even know how it happens until
my sixteenth birthday. I know it wouldn't kill me if I wasn't claimed then, so
I don't have to worry about it for a while."
"Mattie, if yer baseline fer no worries is it won't kill me, we need ta have a
serious talk. We're not mad ye didn't say something, we're worried. Ye know
tha', yeah?"
Matthew nodded, still looking at the floor. "I'm sorry. Is there anything else
you want to know about this?" If you ask me, I'll tell you. I'll give you
anything you want. I'm so sorry for your sake that you chose me and I feel like
the most selfish person in the world for letting you. God help us, even if I
wanted to leave you, I don't know if I could. You should run even if I beg you
to stay.
Please stay.
"Yes, I do at least, but I think that's something you're going to have to tell
us on your own," Gilbert said gently. "Right now, I only have two questions.
One: can you think of something happening soon that will hurt you?"
You both walking out because being together alone is less complicated than
staying around me.
"No."
"Will you bite us?"
God, help me.
"Yes."
===============================================================================
Gilbert watched as Matthew stepped towards Alistair and leaned down to kiss
him. He felt a pang of longing but it was to join them rather than pull them
apart. He uncharacteristically ignored the urge at first, opting to observe
Alistair tug Matthew closer and getting him to straddle his lap with an
impatience that he had earned. Fucking hell, six months. Gilbert had had no
clue, not because he didn't pay attention to his friend, but because it was so
far outside his realm of understanding that Alistair couldn't get laid if he
wanted to. The look he had given Matthew earlier, the dark, hungry one, was
known to make people lose all clothing in minutes. Hell, back when they first
started experimenting with each other at fifteen, the look alone would make
Gilbert drop: whatever he was doing, his clothes, his towel…to his knees. He
had gained some immunity to it after a while, but it took time. The fact that
Matthew was able to think of food after it even as he clearly wanted him was
nothing short of amazing. Yes, his pupils had been so dilated that they were
almost round again and he had flushed halfway down his neck, but in all
honestly satin was not the best material for hiding a hard on, especially
without underwear.
Keeping his eyes on Matthew's face while he had been pacing had been difficult,
for more than one reason. Yes, there were the pants, but aging just those
months had gotten rid of a lot of the softness of childhood that had been just
barely holding on when they had met. Gilbert didn't know if it was because of
how traumatically painful the process was (which Gilbert was never going to
forgive himself for triggering, fucking Christ no one should have to go through
what Matthew did because of him) or because his muscles had been doing nothing
but tensing and relaxing during it, but Matthew had gained a hint of
definition. The fact that his shoulders had broadened that much over what
should have been (an unspecified number of) months but at least four said that
he was going to probably share the athletic, deceptively (and scarily) strong
build of his twin. The shirt he was wearing was passable, but also obviously
too tight.
Still, he was smaller than Alistair, a fact his old friend took advantage of as
he pressed Matthew closer to him before flipping them over in one smooth
motion. Matthew's eyes flew open and he moaned. His movements grew more frantic
when Alistair deepened the kiss and licked into his mouth. It didn't take long
for Matthew to turn his head to one side, eyes closed and gasping for breath
even as his legs crossed behind Alistair. He nodded when Alistair whispered
something in his ear and raised his arms above his head as his shirt was
quickly dispatched. The second the fabric cleared his hands, Matthew reached to
the hem of Alistair's shirt and worked it over his head slowly with a teasing
smile, an expression completely at odds with the long, sharp fangs. Gilbert
took in the sight and wished he had a camera to capture the moment. Goddamn,
but his boyfriends were hot.
They kissed again briefly before turning to him with expectant looks. "What?
Mattie's not the only one who can enjoy a show."
"More participant, less observation," Alistair said, earning a giggle out of
Matthew at the nerdy joke before kissing his way down Matthew's neck.
"Fuckin' nerds," Gilbert teased but lifted his shirt over his head.
Matthew ran a hand through Alistair's hair as he said, "Hmm, you're no better.
Don't forget I—ah!"
Alistair had found the spot on Matthew's neck that Gilbert had two weeks prior,
jump-starting Matthew's Veela symptoms. He watched now as Matthew's eyes
widened, the pupils narrowing suddenly to slits and the blue glowing more that
Gilbert had ever seen it, before they fluttered shut. He looked the good kind
of devastated and reached for Gilbert even as his hips jerked against Alistair.
Gilbert leaned down to kiss him, the hand that wasn't holding him up sliding
down Alistair's back because it could. Matthew didn't fight him and returned
the kiss with more fervor, not even hesitating when Gilbert ventured to learn
the shape of his fangs. When Matthew pulled away to cry out as his back and
neck arched in response to whatever Alistair was doing at the time, Gilbert
happily moved to suck a mark on his neck to be the perfect mirror of the one
Alistair left before. A hand that was larger than Matthew's traced his abdomen
and he gave one last nip to the skin under his mouth before lifting his head to
look at the redhead.
A trail of love bites down Matthew's body led to Alistair leaving yet another
at his hip, just above the elastic of the satin bottoms. His eyes rolled
upwards to meet Gilbert's and it was the hot, hungry look that even now made
Gilbert's breath catch. Alistair smirked as his hand ran a quick path over
Gilbert's stomach to tug at the waistband of his jeans.
Matthew's hand trailed up his spine and he said, "Kiss him."
Gilbert didn't need to be told twice. He carded a hand through Alistair's hair
and pulled just hard enough to make his eyes close and his face go slack. Yes,
Alistair could stop Gilbert with a look and knew every button to push to drive
him insane, but Gilbert could play his body like a damn fiddle. It was just a
matter of what sounds he wanted to hear that day.
Alistair followed the pull easily and kissed Gilbert like he wanted to devour
him. Matthew made a small, eager sound and said quietly, "Alistair, give me
your right hand."
Both he and Gilbert paused at the request and turned to look at Matthew. With
his lips red and swollen, skin now flushed halfway down his chest, and eyes
dark and serious under heavy lids, he looked like a famed seducer his kind were
known to be. Alistair took a deep breath and put his hand in Matthew's. Matthew
brought it to his mouth slowly and opened his mouth wide enough that there was
space enough between the upper and lower fangs to fit the side of Alistair's
hand between them. Then, while holding Alistair's gaze, he bit him.
As far as Gilbert could tell, Matthew had only bitten hard enough to just break
the skin, twin beads of blood welling up from the wounds. Matthew didn't move
as Alistair flinched then frowned. Gilbert stared at him as he blinked rapidly
down at Matthew before closing his eyes completely and shuddering.
Gilbert was almost entirely sure that he wasn't in pain, but he still prompted
his boyfriend with a worried, "Scottie?"
"Fuck!" Alistair groaned his response and the breathing sped. Matthew released
him and Alistair looked at him with utter amazement that was clouded with clear
pleasure. His hand shook as it lightly ran over Matthew's mouth. "Fuck me.
Mattie, why did ye not say—ah!" Alistair's arm seemed to give out and he caught
himself on his forearm, just before he landed on Matthew. He was breathing
heavily as he said, no begged, "Can I touch ye? Please, can I—"
"Yes," Matthew breathed with wide but excited eyes. Something about biting
Alistair had made him very happy.
Alistair moved quickly to kiss Matthew hard, pushing him into the mattress. It
wasn't long before he sat up and pulled Gilbert into a scorching, rough kiss.
He pulled away just as quickly but kept a hand in his hair long enough to say
against his mouth, "Ye need ta feel this. Ye need ta—uh—ta see this." He
released him and growled at Matthew, "Bite him."
Alistair once again started working his way down Matthew's body from his neck.
Gilbert blinked at him in surprise at the extreme reaction then offered his
right hand to Matthew. He shook his head. "No, I need your—fuck, Alistair! Your
non-dominant hand."
Gilbert shrugged but supposed it made a good amount of sense. If this ended up
burning like hell, at least he would still be able to function, though Matthew
didn't seem too worried about that anymore. The nerves that were apparent when
he had first taken Alistair's hand were gone and he licked his lips in
anticipation. He held Gilbert's gaze and his hand very carefully, not even
jostling it when he jerked and moaned from whatever Alistair was doing to him.
The points of Matthew's teeth scraped lightly over his skin and Gilbert nodded
at him, trusting that Matthew wouldn't hurt him. If Gilbert had learned
anything from this, it was that Matthew would never intentionally harm him and
had earned his trust.
Matthew bit him.
===============================================================================
Alistair was not going to make up six-months of skin hunger and unresolved lust
in a night, but damn if his boyfriends weren't doing their best.
"Yer tryin' ta kill me," he panted, eyes shut and utterly overwhelmed. He was
viscerally aware of Gilbert above him and Matthew to his side, of everywhere
they were touching.
Gilbert chuckled darkly and Matthew smiled against his lips before sliding his
mouth to his ear. "Oui, mais c'est seulement une petite mort," he said
smoothly, just loud enough that Gilbert heard him. He shuddered, losing his
rhythm only a moment as he swore in German. Alistair couldn't help the whine
that escaped is throat, having never head Matthew speak in his other tongue
before and thought, this is going to be a long night.
"Yer too coherent," he responded with and reached for the youngest of them to
rectify that problem.
===============================================================================
Matthew blinked his eyes open to see the room illuminated with the soft light
of dawn and smiled. It was clearly too early to get up, but he didn't resent
his body for waking him this early because it meant he got to unabashedly revel
in this moment.
A soul-deep contentment resonated as he lifted his head and tried to shift to
check that both of his boyfriends were still asleep. Considering that he was
lying half on top of Gilbert and Alistair had an arm thrown over both of them
from his other side, he had to be careful not to jostle either one of them. He
was almost uncomfortably warm from all the combined heat they were throwing
off, but the last thing he wanted to do was move.
Gilbert was breathing deeply, his face turned away from them but clearly
relaxed from his profile. Alistair's head was resting on Gilbert's shoulder and
his eyelashes fluttered from whatever he was dreaming, breath deep and even.
Because Matthew had been sleeping on Gilbert's chest, he was close enough to
Alistair to kiss him. He resisted the urge, happy enough to know that he could
kiss him if he wanted to. He looked between them a moment longer and a fierce
wave of possession crashed into him. Matthew didn't fight it, secure in the
knowledge that they weren't just his boyfriends.
Gilbert and Alistair were his mates. Plural.
He had known it the moment Alistair marked him and only had it confirmed when
they both had a…very positive reaction to his venom. Matthew didn't know
exactly how it felt for them but he had enjoyed the experience probably more
than he should have, not entirely comfortable with how he had liked the taste
of their blood mixed with his venom. He was also mildly concerned about
Alistair's comment to Gilbert, that he had to seesomething, but he had been too
blissed out to remember to ask about it afterwards and during the rather
awkward clean-up process (walking back and forth to the washrooms at the other
side of the wing in front of the clearly knowing nurses had been hell, even
though he looked completely human as he did it).
He was also more than a little preoccupied with deciding whether or not to
explain to them exactly what they were to him. Even now, Matthew questioned his
decision to wait, but to tell them the truth they outright asked him something.
His reasoning was that they should to get used to being together before
mentioning how Matthew was made for them. He was already uncomfortable with the
fact they knew about the consequences of them not bonding to him on his
seventeenth birthday. The last thing Matthew wanted was for either one of them
to feel forced into staying with him forever.
Yet, it felt wrong to keep such vital knowledge from them. Sure, it was only
instrumental to Matthew, but it still had something to do with them. He had to
tell Alfred and his family, the headmistress and hospital matron, they would
tell relevant people, and Lovino already knew (a fact that he was going to be
overly smug about but Matthew didn't particularly care). It seemed odd that
Alistair and Gilbert would be left in the dark and Matthew didn't want them to
feel like they were the last to know. But Matthew would have to explain within
the next two months or so anyway. That time would help them settle without his
mates carrying the same burden of fate he did.
On more than one level, this entire situation was fucked up. The fact that
Veela were made for their mates but had no guarantee that their human mates
were made for them or would choose them was incredibly unfair. He was beyond
happy with them, but knowing he was altered on a physical and metaphysical
level to perfectly suit them left him a little uncomfortable if he thought
about it too long.
But what could he do about it? What is, is. He could either spend time freaking
out about it, or just enjoy the consequences as much as he could. Being angry
about it wouldn't change his biology, so why waste the energy? Matthew relaxed
once more against Gilbert and tried to sleep. He would need his strength and
patience for what was to come.
Chapter End Notes
     Chapter title is from Panic! at the Disco's "Emperor's New Clothes."
     "If it feels good, tastes good, it must be mine...I see what's mine
     and take it."
***** Everybody Wants to Know Secrets I Have Held *****
Chapter Notes
     Non-explicit sex ahead. Also a great deal of angst, including a
     discussion of self-harm. Sorry in advance but also, considering the
     last chapter, what did you expect? All hurt comes with a great big
     side of comfort. I'm not adding all their kinks to the tags because
     that would honestly look ridiculous. Finally, did you know that
     studies have shown when you really believe something, then you'll
     probably keep on believing it even if shown conclusive evidence to
     the contrary? Fascinating thing, the mind.
See the end of the chapter for more notes
Alistair woke up slowly, increasingly aware of the too-bright light against his
eyes, the unfamiliarity of the mattress beneath him, and the unexpected heat of
another body against his. It was that last that had him blinking his eyes open.
He adjusted quickly to the morning light and caught sight of Matthew first,
face lax in sleep and hand reaching to curl lightly over Alistair's waist. To
do it, he had to reach across their shared human pillow.
Alistair winced as he lifted his head to check if Gilbert was still asleep,
figuring that his arm had to be damn near bloodless from having Alistair's head
on it all night. Gilbert twitched at the movement but stayed asleep, tilting
his chin down a fraction and moving his other arm to hold Matthew to him, hand
coming to rest low on the Hufflepuff's back, inches below Alistair's own. He
stared at the two of them, imagining the picture all of them made, and
thought,last night actually happened.
There was obvious physical evidence of what they had done the night before
making itself known. He ached in a way that was all too familiar after a night
under his best friend, now boyfriend. But the discomfort was new, too, not just
from how long it had been since Gilbert last made him forget his own name. No,
it was the tingling sensation from four small puncture wounds on his right hand
and the numerous light scrapes along his arm, down his neck, up his thigh, and
across his chest that reminded Alistair that he had never had a night like the
one that had just passed, but he prayed he would again. And soon.
Matthew, he mentally sighed as he moved the hand he had against the boy's back
to lightly trace the curve of his cheek, the line of his nose, and finally the
shape of his lips. The half-Veela was a marvel and had completely surprised
Alistair by the depth of his passion, his drive to mark both Gilbert and
Alistair as his, if only for the night. Even Gilbert had seemed thrown despite
the possessive marks he had worn on his body for the last week. It had been
exhilarating and earth-shattering, but Alistair had the thought, even in the
heat of the moment, that he was glad he and Gilbert had agreed not to take it
too far with Matthew immediately.
They had actually talked about not having intercourse with Matthew before he
woke up the night before for three reasons. First, if Matthew was okay with a
poly relationship, then they would have just started dating. Both Slytherins
wanted their relationship to be more established before taking that step. There
was no need to rush anything. Second, they were in the hospital wing for a damn
good reason and Matthew would probably need to take it easy for the next few
days. Finally, Matthew was fifteen. He was fifteen and a virgin. Hell, Gilbert
had been his first kiss. While virginity was a social construct and all, it
didn't mean Alistair and Gilbert didn't want to make Matthew's first time
anything short of perfect. The decision had an edge of hypocrisy since Alistair
had first been with Gilbert at that age, but there was a difference between two
fifteen-year-olds being each other's first fuck and a fifteen year old sleeping
with two more experienced seventeen-year-olds. It felt…wrong on some level and
Alistair didn't do things that he thought he would regret later. Considering
how short that list was, it caught his attention when something came up.
(Gilbert had wanted to tell him, "You have to be this old to ride our dicks,"
but Alistair vetoed the idea. It was amusing and he didn't want to fuck Matthew
that night, but it didn't mean he wanted to be banished from his bed in
disgust. Gilbert had seen reason and agreed.)
Matthew had been understanding when they explained their reservations about
midway through things last night, narrowing his eyes in displeasure before
smirking and saying, "That leaves a lot we can still do." And they did do a
lot, a significant portion of which was initiated by Matthew. It was almost as
if he were saying over and over, I accept and respect your boundaries, but
youwillgive me everything, all of you, eventually.
He wasn't wrong. If Alistair had his way, he and Gilbert would be with Matthew
on his sixteenth birthday. Sweet Sixteen, indeed. That is, until he remembered
that Matthew's maturation symptoms got worse then, too, but he would take every
silver lining he could get.
That looming milestone wasn't the only reason Alistair was looking forward to
the passage of time. No, if the venom-induced visions (hallucinations?) he had
were any indication of what the future held for their relationship, Alistair
had verymuch to—
The soft, wet touch of a tongue flicking over his fingertips brought Alistair
back to the present. While he had zoned out thinking about the (possible)
future, Matthew had woken from the slight lingering pressure on his lips.
Alistair blinked to focus on the dark blue eyes of his younger boyfriend as he
smiled in greeting and kissed his hand again. "Good morning," he said softly.
Alistair felt his expression become disgustingly besotted, but he didn't care.
It was just them and Matthew deserved to know how he made him feel, especially
after his ordeal the day before. "Mornin', Mattie," he murmured, aware how
light of a sleeper Gilbert could be. "How do ye feel?"
His smile widened to a grin, eyes sparking even as they crinkled at the
corners. "Happy."
How is he this adorable? What the fuck? I feel attacked?Alistair tucked
Matthew's hair behind his ear as he said, "Tha's wonderful, leannan, but I
meant physically."
"Oh." He seemed to think about it for a moment before saying, "I'm okay.
Hungry, but good."
"Yer not sore? From anythin'?"
"No? I—"
"Why in the world," Gilbert grumbled, "are you two awake?"
"Because I don't have me eye-mask an' it's too feckin' bright in here,"
Alistair answered shortly.
"You sleep with an eye mask on?" Matthew asked, clearly amused.
Gilbert slit his eyes open and smirked at them. "Yeah, he does, though
sometimes he goes without because of how the lake filters the light. It's
really cute."
"It's not cute. It's practical."
"Nope. We're dating now and I feel perfectly comfortable with telling you it's
pretty damn cute, Scottie," Gilbert said, running a hand down his back.
"I believe it," Matthew said, grinning now and sitting up. He finger-combed his
hair, longer now than he was used to, out of his face and frowned. "Ugh, I need
a hair tie."
Alistair watched him move, viscerally aware of every inch between them. Then he
looked down at Gilbert and said, "I'll accept tha' me eye-mask is cute if we
all agree tha' Mattie is unfairly adorable."
"What?" Matthew squinted at him, confused and a little blind without his
glasses.
"Done. There wasn't even a question," Gilbert answered him easily. He reached
over to the bedside table and handed Matthew his glasses.
"Wait, no, back up. I am so not the attractive one in this relationship."
Alistair stared at him as he got his glasses on his face, sure that his
incredulity was apparent. "Wha's tha'?" He looked at Gilbert. "Wha' did he just
say?"
Gilbert just shook his head. "It sounded like English but it sure as shit
didn't make sense to me."
"Guys, come on." Matthew said, almost whining. He lowered his eyes and a blush
started to spread on his cheeks. Oh, something was not right.
"No, Matthew. Ye need ta explain this ta me, 'cause I'm right confused."
"Wait," Gilbert said, sitting up and eyes sharp, like he was remembering
something. "Mattie, you can't be serious. You have to know."
Matthew seemed to collapse a little on himself. "I know enough," he said
quietly, defeated.
"Okay, stop." Alistair said, not liking at all where this was going, how the
light had gone out of Matthew's eyes. "We are not goin' ta assume we all know
wha's happenin' so there are no misunderstandings. Personally, I am really
feckin' confused as ta wha' tha hell Mattie meant with tha' comment. Gilly,
wha' do ye think ye know?"
Gilbert's jaw clinched, eyes blazing. "I think that Matthew thinks he's not
beautiful. That he's not gorgeous or utterly captivating."
Alistair whipped his head around to stare at their third, floored. "Is he
right?" Matthew wouldn't meet his eyes, wouldn't even look their way. He tried
again. "Mattie, can ye please tell us wha' yer thinkin'?
"…I. I'm just aware there's a disparity in attractiveness level between me and
you. That's all." Alistair continued staring at him, incomprehension growing to
disbelief. "Please, both of you, don't look at me like that. You have to know
you're the two hottest people in school."
"Mattie," Gilbert tried. "We know we're attractive. But we are both with you.
We adore your personality and how you look. I thought we proved that last
night, at the very least."
Matthew's blush flared, but he seemed…sad. "I guess I just realized…" He huffed
a laugh and gave them the most heartbreaking smile Alistair had ever seen. "I
don't know if you would have looked at me twice if I wasn't a Veela."
"Mattie, three things." Alistair began. "One, if you looked like you do now
even as a full human, I can guarantee we would be attracted ta ye. Two, we want
ye for who ye are, not what. We both wanted ye before we had any clue what ye
were. Three, could ye please come over here. I'm all but itchin' ta touch ye."
Matthew looked unconvinced but moved closer to sit between them. The minute
they touched, a tension that had been building between Alistair's shoulders
eased. Huh, that's new. "Okay, I accept that you both like how I look. But you
have to admit, people are going to be so confused when they figure out you're
both with me."
Gilbert shrugged. "Sure, they won't understand us, maybe, but it won't be based
on how any of us look. And what they think won't matter." Gilbert leaned in and
nuzzled Matthew's neck. A shudder went through him and Alistair smirked at his
boyfriends, approving of this new conversational direction.
"They'll just be jealous," he added, leaning down to capture Matthew's lips
with his own. He loved taking his time kissing him, feeling how much his touch
affected the half-Veela. It was comforting to know that he could make him fall
apart and crave his touch as much as Alistair needed his.
Matthew was gasping, eyes glowing with lust and his body shaking with need from
both his and Gilbert's attentions, when a very firm series of knocks came from
the door. Matthew startled, nearly jumping out of their embrace, but they both
held him firm. The Slytherins did shift to merely hold Matthew's hands. They
were settled on the bed in their pajamas, holding hands when someone opened the
door a crack and asked, "Are you three awake?"
"Y-yes. Come in." Matthew called. Madam Longbottom then stepped through the
door, clipboard in hand and eyes assessing. Alistair watched as Matthew turned
red, probably remembering all the marking he and Gilbert had done on his neck.
Gilbert was less visibly embarrassed, though there was a light flush to his
face that complimented his coloring. He would have to remind himself to tease
him about how much of a Disney princess he looked when he blushed. Where before
yesterday it would have been telling, now it was long overdue.
Alistair didn't feel embarrassed in the least. She had left three teenaged,
romantically involved boys together in a well-supplied room overnight. He had
nothing to be ashamed of. He met her gaze evenly and without any trouble. She
raised her eyebrows at him but smiled, just a little.
Madam Longbottom said, "Well, you certainly look better than when I last saw
you, Matthew. How are you feeling?"
"Um, good. Really good."
Her smile widened. "No lingering discomfort or growing pains?"
Matthew shook his head. "No, ma'am. Mostly, I'm just hungry."
"That's to be expected. You should probably eat a large meal at least four
times a day to keep your energy levels up, with lots of lean protein and leafy
green vegetables. If you aren't lactose intolerant, drink milk and eat yoghurt.
Start carrying a water bottle to class, because you need to drink a lot of
water. Also be sure to carry a snack like nuts during the day to munch on
between classes. Still enjoy what you eat, but be sure to get some vitamins in
there. I don't know how much eating well will help the next year, but it
certainly won't hurt."
Matthew blinked at all the instructions, but Alistair had been making a mental
list. He wouldn't police what Matthew was eating, but he could try to make sure
he always had options that fit Longbottom's criteria.
"Now, I need to give you a once over so if Gilbert and Alistair could leave
the—"
"Actually," Matthew cut in suddenly, then seemed to hesitate. "I-if it won't a
problem, could they stay?"
Her eyes narrowed as she looked Matthew over again. "Are you feeling unstable?"
"No, no! It's just, being separated from me seemed to bother them a little
earlier and I want to keep in contact with them as much as possible." Alistair
winced at that, not entirely pleased Matthew had noticed how bothered he, and
apparently Gilbert, were when they weren't touching him. There was a line
between affection and unhealthy attachment and Alistair was honestly thinking
his reaction fell on the wrong side of it.
Madam Longbottom's eyes shifted to take in Alistair and Gilbert. "Gentlemen,
what are those silvery lines on your necks and arms?"
Matthew paled at the implication, but Alistair answered simply, "Marks from
Mattie's fangs."
She blinked at them slowly once, twice, like she was trying to process the
information. She cleared her throat and asked, "Matthew, did you take blood
from them?"
Matthew cringed. "Not deliberately. My venom healed any cuts immediately."
She blinked again. "Remarkable. The healing capabilities so limited to…" She
trailed off then shook her head, focusing on the matter at hand. "Alistair,
Gilbert, did it hurt you? The…the biting?"
Gilbert coughed and was about as red as Matthew usually got. "No, Madam
Longbottom. If it hurt at all, the pain stopped almost immediately."
"Hmm. Where there any other effects of note besides the instant healing
and…pain relief?"
Gilbert's face flared brighter, so Alistair answered the question. "Pleasure
an' temporary hallucinations."
"What? What hallucinations?" Matthew asked, sounding…concerned. Alistair looked
at him and saw he looked almost faint.
Alistair frowned, releasing Matthew's hand to rub his back. "Ye alright,
Mattie?"
Matthew shook his head rapidly and looked between him and Gilbert. "I'm fine.
What hallucinations? Did you both have them?"
Gilbert nodded and Alistair said, "Ye didn't know we would have 'em?"
"No." Matthew said, sounding a little lost.
Madam Longbottom was writing furiously on her clipboard. "How long did they
last?"
"It depended on whether Mattie had bitten or jus' run his fangs over tha skin.
When he bit me, it lasted several moments. With tha other, it was only
flashes."
"Were they all of the same…thing?"
"Same theme, for sure." Alistair said, unable to help the self-satisfied smirk
on his face.
Gilbert whispered furiously, "Scottie, holy shit."
"Oh, my God," Matthew said, burying his face in his hands. Oh. He might be
being an asshole. Oops.
Alistair cleared his throat. "Sorry. Anyway, I was aware of me surroundin's
while it happened, like I was watchin' a movie shot in first person from a
distance. It was easy ta distinguish between reality an' vision."
"Vision? Why do you use that word? Did it feel like divination?"
Alistair frowned and really thought about it. "…No, but I'm not exactly gifted
with tha Sight. I said 'vision' because of how different things were."
She looked up at him then. "In what way?"
"Well, fer one we all looked aulder. Fer another, we were wearin' weddin'
bands."
Matthew fainted.
===============================================================================
Gilbert caught Matthew as he slumped over. For fuck's sake, he thought, laying
Matthew down on the bed as smoothly as possible. "Alistair, I swear to God—"
"Move," Madam Longbottom demanded, suddenly at the side of the bed. She shooed
him towards Alistair so she could get to Matthew, so he went. They both stopped
touching him long enough for her to wave her wand over their now unconscious
boyfriend. After several tense moments, she said, "He's fine, healthy enough.
He was just shocked, I suppose. I'll be back in a moment with smelling salts.
I'll also put in an order for food for you three. He needs to eat something as
soon as possible. Stay here."
She strode out of the room purposefully. Gilbert shot Alistair a glare. "Way to
break it gently, Scottie."
"Wha'? Did ye want ta answer her questions?" Alistair answered quickly, but it
was lacking the venom the words could have held. He reached for Matthew's hand
and Gilbert started tracing curving patterns on Matthew's arm.
"No, but Matthew was clearly distressed about the hallucinations. I would have
left out the part where it looked like we had gotten married at the very
least." That little detail had eluded Gilbert at the time as he had been
thoroughly distracted by everything else. But who could blame him? It wasn't
like it was normal to watch obviously older versions of you and your boyfriends
fucking each other senseless. Well, that was perhaps the wrong word. Those
future(?) selves had been having sex, but there had been laughter and light and
love in their actions. They had been happy and, thinking back, there had been
flashes of silver on their left hands.
"Why, though? I fer one am happy ta have some proof tha' we aren't entirely
daft fer tryin' ta make this work. It may not even be tha future we saw. It
could jus' be a possibility, a shared fantasy. We don't know."
Gilbert sighed and admitted to himself that he had a point. He ran a hand down
his face and said, "We could try to figure it out. What color were the bands in
yours?"
"Silver, but ye know I hate wearin' gold."
"That's fair." Gilbert was well aware of Alistair's strange aversion to wearing
anything yellow gold. He said it was too flashy for his taste. Any ill-advised
fantasies of the two of them being married as adults before he met Matthew
involved matching metal bands that gleamed with the muted light of silver.
"What about appearance? How old did we look in your vision? Late twenties?"
"Yeah. What were we doin' in yers? The one ye had after Mattie bit us."
Gilbert licked his lips, eyes going a bit unfocused at the memory. "I…" He
glanced quickly at the closed door then hurried to say, voice low. "I was
sandwiched between you two, fucking him while you fucked me."
Alistair blinked at him, flush finallyfilling his face at the image. "Well, we
did not see tha same vision."
Gilbert pursed his lips at him and hissed quietly, "You can't leave me hanging
like that. What did you see?"
Alistair bit his lip and met Gilbert's eyes. "We were both fuckin' him." When
Gilbert just looked at him blankly for a moment, he added, "At tha same time."
Gilbert's brain broke a little. Slowly, he said, "You don't mean spit
roasting."
"No."
"You mean—"
"Yes, Gilbert."
"Fucking hell. How did we manage—"
"Practice."
They stared at each other, then glanced at their unconscious, still underage
boyfriend. It was Gilbert that said, "We can't fuck this up. I mean, even if
those visions were just possibilities, we were married, Scottie, or as close to
it as three people can legally be. We were old, at least ten years older than
we are now, and we seemed happy.I might be crazy, but I don't want to lose that
chance."
"Yer not mad, love." Alistair said, reaching out to cup his face. Gilbert
turned his face to kiss his palm. "I don't want ta lose it either."
Madam Longbottom came back in at that moment and Alistair dropped his hand. She
saw how they were positioned and shook her head. "How long did you two go
before touching Matthew?"
Gilbert hesitated because the answer was less than ten seconds after she had
left. Alistair was more generous with them as he said, "Less than thirty
seconds."
"What happens if you go for long without touching him?" She asked, putting a
small vial underneath Matthew's nose. It took about three seconds for him to
wake up, recoiling violently from the smell. "Welcome back, Matthew."
He looked around frantically but, seeing Gilbert and Alistair relaxed, calmed
after a moment. "What happened?"
"You fainted at the mention of matrimony," the Matron answered dryly, "though
that may have something to do with needing to eat. Food is on its way. Now, you
two could answer my question? How long do you usually go without touching him?"
Gilbert took this one, "For me, usually no more than a minute if we are in the
same vicinity. Longer if I make a conscious effort to do so."
"So you have to think about it?" She clarified.
"Yes."
"Alistair? Do you have the same experience?"
"No, ma'am. I didn't touch Mattie at all 'til Friday and tha' had been
unintentional."
"And what did it feel like, to go to so long without touching him?"
Gilbert stared at Alistair and watched a blush rise to his face once more.
Considering how much it took to make that happen, Gilbert knew before he
started speaking he wouldn't like his answer. "It…it wasn't a problem 'til I
had spent a lot of time around him. Then it became kinda a chronic ache?
Something tha' was not very noticeable 'til it was?"
She blinked at him. "You're saying it hurt?"
He winced in response. "Not really. It was…uncomfortable. An' became really
hard ta resist over time. Last week was by far tha worst."
"Worse than this morning has been?"
He tilted his head to the side a little. "Excuse me?"
"Gilbert," she started, focusing on him again. "What did it feel like to go
without touching Matthew for any length of time this morning?"
There had to be a reason for asking these questions, but damn if answering them
wasn't embarrassing. "Like…pressure. There was this internal tension that was
making me restless. It eased when we touched."
"Is this similar to what you felt, Alistair?"
"…Aye."
Madam Longbottom sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Okay, here's what
I think is happening. Matthew, your venom as quite a number of side effects,
one of them being that that your m—"
"Boyfriends!" Matthew cut in quickly, in a manner that was frankly suspicious
as hell. Gilbert exchanged a look with Alistair that said clearly that he
thought that was fishy, too. A slight shake of the head reminded him of
Lovino's words from the day before. There are some things he hasn't wanted to
talk about and we shouldn't push him on it.
"…Right. They need to touch you more today to keep from feeling restless. As I
see it, your venom is like a drug to them and it needs time to work its way out
of their bloodstream. Assuming their kidneys are working properly, the worst of
it should have been taken care of while you slept. Considering the reaction
time and effects you've told me about, it should filter through their systems
relatively quickly. I am assuming that you both have more of those markings
under your clothes? You were exposed to a lot of Matthew's venom. If so much
hadn't been into your systems, then I doubt you would be having this problem at
all. Moderation is the key, gentlemen."
Matthew looked like he was going to faint again, breath coming too quickly. In
fact he was…shaking. "You—you're saying that I spent most of the night drugging
my boyfriends? And now it's hurting them?"
Between one blink and the next, his eyes changed.
Uh oh.
Shit.
Gilbert was closer, so he pulled Matthew into his lap so that his back was to
his front, arms hugging him close. Almost like they had discussed it, Alistair
came around his front and held his face gently in his hands. He spoke low and
soothingly. "Shhh, Mattie. We're not hurtin', I swear it. Ye did not hurt us."
Matthew's trembling slowed immediately at the words. Gilbert continued, "You
did nothing we did not want or ask for, Matthew. We aren't hurt, not at all."
The shaking stopped and his breathing calmed. "You promise?" He asked and he
sounded so vulnerable, so fragile that Gilbert couldn't help holding him just a
little tighter.
He pressed a kiss to his hair and said, "We promise."
"Aye, leannan, we promise."
"Okay," he said, relaxing into Gilbert's hold and offering Alistair a short,
sweet kiss. Alistair pulled away, holding one of Matthew's hands as they looked
as one to the healer who was once again eyeing them critically.
After a moment, she said, "Matthew, I understand and respect your reticence in
bringing Gilbert and Alistair in to calm you yesterday. But you need to
understand now that I cannot let that happen again. I just saw them stop you,
in thirty seconds, from going into a rage that took four hours to run its
course. You were severely dehydrated, utterly exhausted, and in extreme pain.
If I hadn't known that it would burn out naturally, I would have thought you
were dying. And they stopped it before it could happen. Do you understand and
agree that their presence is the best way to treat your condition?"
Her words filled Gilbert with delayed terror and regret for what Matthew had
endured, but Matthew just blinked at her. "Yes."
"Gilbert, Alistair, if you are able and Matthew needs you, will you come here
when called?"
"Of course."
"Aye."
"Good. That hopefully won't become an issue again but it's nice to have that on
the table. Matthew, while you were unconscious I did a general health check on
you. You're healthy, if a little dehydrated and underweight. I will need to do
a more thorough exam, but that can wait for a later date. Make sure to drink
plenty of water and eat more often. Now, do you have any questions before I
go?"
"Yes, I do." Gilbert said, mouth a little dry at how close of a call that was.
"What happens if Alistair or I get hurt?"
Matthew immediately tensed and he knew by the way Alistair started kissing his
knuckles that his eyes had changed at the very mention of the scenario. Gilbert
thought he would have that reaction, which is why he asked the question. They
needed to figure out protocol nowrather than when it actually happened.
Madam Longbottom seemed to agree. "Well, would both of you be okay with Matthew
being called if you were hurt?" When they both nodded, she continued, "In that
case, if either of you are injured, I'll set you up in here if it is not
already in use. As this room is reserved for Matthew and Alfred, let's hope the
conflict will never come up. This is highly irregular, but considering the
circumstances…would you all agree to grant each other spousal privileges when
it comes to your medical information?"
A thrill went through Gilbert at the request and he shared a loaded gaze with
Alistair. He had a lot of questions as to just what would prompt a healer to
offer that to three people who had been in a relationship for less than 24
hours, but he would ask none of them here. It probably all went back to
whatever Matthew was terrified to tell them yet the Matron was clearly aware
of. It bothered him that the information was clearly medically pertinent to be
on a need-to-know basis and apparently neither he nor Alistair needed to know
something that involved them. But Matthew was having a hard enough time as it
was and if it was something that keeping to himself for now would lower his
stress levels, then they wouldn't push.
In the face of all the possibilities, the only answer they wanted to give was,
"Yes."
===============================================================================
Matthew was still reeling by the time breakfast arrived. Madam Longbottom had
left them, saying she would check in a few hours down the line to see how they
were doing. When he'd asked if he could have some of his homework brought to
him (because, holy shit, he had a lot to do), she had shot him something close
to very close dirty look and said, "Rest, Matthew. I'll give you all a healer's
note for tomorrow to excuse any assignments due."
Gilbert and Alistair had been quiet after Madam Longbottom had asked about
spousal privilege. He desperately wanted to know what they were thinking, but
was honestly at a loss for how to answer the questions they surely had. Matthew
was still mulling over how to break the silence as he dug into his food. There
were decidedly healthier options than he would have chosen for himself (heavy
on berries, nuts, yoghurt and whole grains), but he didn't care much at that
point. Finally, he thought to say, "Alistair?"
"Hmm?" He looked at him then and Matthew tried to spot any distancing cold in
his expression. His green eyes were calm, expectant and maybe Matthew was
thinking too hard about all of this.
He relaxed a little and asked, "That word you call me? What does it mean?"
His lips quirked but he said gently. "Sweetheart."
"Oh." Matthew felt his face heat and tried to ignore it. "I-I need to think of
a name for you. I already have one for Gil."
Alistair shrugged. "No need ta force it, Mattie, though I amcurious how Gilly
got his. 'Angel,' wasn't it?" He smirked at Gilbert, who threw a blueberry at
him in response. Alistair just caught it in his mouth and smirked wider.
"You're just jealous I have one and you don't."
"Nah. I like tha sound of me name on his lips." Alistair winked at Matthew and
he blushed again. When their response was only to laugh, Matthew wondered, What
have I gotten myself into?
===============================================================================
Longbottom eventually let them go after several hours had passed during which
they had eaten again, gotten dressed, had a make out session (or three), and
taken a nap. Matthew was pleased that that his mates could now go more than ten
minutes without touching him, though he had mixed feelings about how fast the
venom marks he'd left on their bodies were fading. Sure, having a series of
silver lines drawn down various, hard-to-hide parts of their bodies would have
been difficult to explain but they were marks only hecould give them.
In any case, he walked towards his dorm room late in the afternoon. It was
interesting, walking any distance with the additional height. Alistair and
Gilbert had been wary of any stumbles as they had headed to the lower levels
together, but Matthew had maintained control of himself, thank you. It was only
after they had split off in directions of their own House dormitories that
Matthew was suddenly faced with an unexpected visitor.
He made a rather embarrassing noise as the Bloody Baron materialized in his
path. He'd stopped his fall from halting so abruptly before he actually hit the
ground, but it was a near thing. "Oh! G-Good afternoon, my lord."
The Baron always did appreciate Matthew addressing him with the proper title.
The first time he had used it was the first time the Baron had ever looked at
him and seen him and was part of the reason the ghost was fond of him.
The Baron didn't say anything for a moment, eyeing him critically, flying
around him once to take in all the details in a worrying amount of scrutiny.
The hallway was empty, but Matthew doubted it would stay that way. After all,
this wasthe primary route to both the kitchens and the Hufflepuff dorm. "I-is
there a problem, my lord?"
The ghost came to rest in front of him once more, expression firm but there was
a softness in his eyes. "I heard that boy fucked up."
What was he…oh. Right. That one time he threatened Gilbert in front of a good
portion of the school. "No! Well, a little but I'm okay and we're okay and I'm
happy and please don't do anything to him?" He was rambling. Perfect.
"Why should I not, Mr. Williams?"
"Because it turned out for the better? Because we all learned from it?" The
Baron looked unconvinced which was just his usual menacing expression with a
raised eyebrow. "Um, it may trigger something that would be really bad for me?
If you…know what I mean, my lord?"
That seemed to be enough because he nodded once, looked over his shoulder, and
then leaned back to Matthew, whispering, "It is true, then? What you are?"
Whispering back, hardly breathing, he replied, hoping this would satisfy the
ghost's curiosity. "A Veela? Yes, my lord."
The Baron stood up straight and shook his head, "I was never sure. Such a
deceptive package." He tutted then flew towards the wall as he said in
farewell, "I look forward to the havoc you will wreak, Mr. Williams."
A couple of Hufflepuffs came around the corner as the Baron's words rang
through the hallway. God but he hoped Gilbert and Alistair were too far away to
have heard. The comment was concerning, leaving Matthew unsure if the ghost
would actually not bother Gilbert or would do it just to see what Matthew would
do. The students who had heard were staring at him with wariness clear on their
faces, so Matthew just smiled and hurried into the dorm.
As he entered his bedroom, still shaken from the interaction, he found a best
friend that was equal parts concerned and smug. The first thing Lovino said
when he saw him was, "Fuckin' told you so."
"Yeah, yeah," Matthew said, fighting a smile. They were alone in the room and
Matthew didn't hesitate to walk right over to him and hug him tight. Lovino
hesitated, since Matthew usually wasn't one to initiate physically affectionate
gestures, but hugged him back all the same. "Thank you, for getting them. And
for staying with me."
"Of course, Mattie." Lovino pulled away then immediately punched him in the
arm.
"Ow, what was that-"
"That, you fucking bastard, was for scaring the shit out of me. Do you know how
terrifying it was to watch you scream in pain for hours, unable to do anything
but hear your talk about how much of a monster you are? Which, by the way, you
are not. You are never going through that again."
Matthew cringed. "I know. I'm sorry. Madam Longbottom said that I couldn't
refuse Gilbert and Alistair helping me in the future after she saw them calm me
within 30 seconds."
Lovino stared at him before pulling him down to sit beside him on the bed.
"Tell me everything."
Matthew put a sound bubble up and started explaining the jist of what happened,
skimming over the more intimate details. About halfway through his explanation,
right as he was explaining the unintentional effects of his venom on his mates,
Nate walked into the room.
Matthew saw him do a quick double take of the sound bubble, then outright stare
at Matthew for a long moment, gaping. Lovino caught the stare and said,
gesturing impatiently, "You got a problem?"
The sound of course didn't make it past the barrier but the general feeling of
it did. Nate asked, clearly astonished and nodding at him, "What happened to
Matthew?"
Oh. Right.
"Uhhh…" Matthew started, at a loss and glancing, panicked, at Lovino. "How do I
explain the aging?"
"Shit. Okay, I got you. Gonna spin this shit like a top. Take down the barrier
for a second." Matthew did and Lovino shot a very convincing glare at Nate, who
probably meant well. "Not that it's your fuckin' business, but he got hit with
a spell gone wrong. If you have more questions, I'm sure Madam Longbottom would
be happy to entertain them since that's where he's been for the past 24 hours."
Used to Lovino's caustic personality after sharing the same room for years,
Nate took the story in stride and looked at Matthew again, hazel eyes intense.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. I just look a little older." Matthew said, surprised at his
apparent concern. Nate nodded and began to turn away when he paused and raised
honey blonde eyebrows at him. "What is it?"
His mouth twitched as he said, "Your boyfriend is not subtle."
Matthew frowned in confusion while Lovino burst out laughing. He looked at his
friend, betrayed. "Oh, don't look at me like that, maple bastard. It doeskinda
look like they took a vacuum to you."
Matthew remembered that he hadn't bothered concealing the marks on his neck and
felt the blood rush to his face. "Shut up," he said, immediately putting up the
sound barrier again so he could finish filling Lovino in.
Nate queried, very quietly, "They?"
Matthew acted like he couldn't hear him. He'd had enough inquiries for the day.
===============================================================================
As they walked back into the Dungeon that afternoon, Alistair let out a snort
of amusement and Gilbert couldn't help asking, "What?"
"At least now we can say tha' sex is our drug of choice an' mean it," he said
so low that even Gilbert could barely hear him.
"What the fuck, Scottie?"
"Well, it's true!" Gilbert glared at him as they made it through the door and
over the bridge. "Och, don't look at me like that, Gilly. It's not like I said
it in front of Mattie."
"It's not like he's a drug."
"Close enough, but I'm not complainin'."
Gilbert knew he didn't mean anything bad and that Matthew had meant well but
still. "…Why do I love you?"
"Feck if I know. Brought tha' upon yerself, ye did."
"Nope, pretty sure you had something to do with that." Gilbert said, teasing.
He felt the eyes of several people in the common room on them and pretended
like they didn't exist. Both of them were wearing the rapidly fading marks from
Matthew like badges of honor and carrying their clothes from yesterday in their
hands. "You're basically a genius. You probably knew exactly what you were
doing to me all those years."
"No, Gilbert." Alistair responded, suddenly serious. "I had no clue."
Gilbert looked at his boyfriend and his mouth went dry. Oh. So we're going to
talk about it. They actually didhave a fair amount to discuss: from exactly
howthey went years without realizing they were in love with each other to what
exactly they thought Matthew was hiding from them. Lovino had only suggested
they not ask Matthew about it, not that they never discuss it between
themselves. "We should—"
He pushed the door open to their dorm room and was immediately greeted by,
"Where the hell have you two been?"
Yikes.
Francis stood from his bed, arms crossed and hip cocked, looking for all the
world like a parent catching their child breaking curfew. He had asked the
question. Antonio, still seated on his bed said, "We were worried, guys.
Neither of you came back last night and…what's that on your necks?"
Uh.
Well. Gilbert tried to answer the first question as Alistair walked past
Francis to put his laundry in his hamper, seemingly unconcerned. "There was an
emergency we had to deal with. It's dealt with."
Francis frowned, relaxing a little. "Emergency with what? It can't be the
supply; the year's last shipment was a week ago."
Shit. Alistair saved him from having to answer. "Our boyfriend was in tha
hospital wing, so we stayed with 'em overnight."
They both mentally stumbled at that. Antonio parroted, "'Our boyfriend?'"
"Aye. Oh, an' we're datin' now, too, so jot tha' down."
Their friends gaped at him and Gilbert knew Alistair was getting a kick out of
their reactions. What an ass, he thought fondly, smiling a little at his
antics. He walked further into the room and finally dropped his dirty clothes.
He started gathering his remaining pile of homework when Francis finally seemed
to reboot. "Fucking finally."
"Congratulations!" Antonio said, standing with a smile and clapping his hands
once. "We should celebrate. Thank God you found a solution to that clusterfuck-
waiting-to-happen. Things were getting a bit tense at the lunch table!"
It was Alistair and Gilbert's turn to stare at them. "You're…not surprised?"
Gilbert asked.
"Good heavens, no." Francis said. "We had been fretting for yearsover how to
get you two to see past your own pining and had been more than a little
concerned as to how tofix the problem when Ma…Mi…"
"Matthew," Alistair supplied.
"When Matthew came into the picture," Francis finished.
"None of you were good at hiding how you felt about each other," Antonio
continued. "Took us a few weeks before we figured out Alistair wanted both of
you. If Gilbert hadn't been so possessive of…"
"Matthew," Gilbert said.
"…then we would have brought up this possibility the second we saw the problem.
Is he feeling better?"
"Yes, he's fine now."
"That's good. Maybe Lovi will stop worrying about him being an idiot now when
we're together."
"And back to Tonio's question…" Francis said, quickly getting a leer in his
eyes as he took in their now bare forearms. "Where exactly did those silver
marks come from?"
Gilbert and Alistair exchanged a look, silently deciding to not answer that
question. Alistair told them as much.
After five minutes of Francis' persistent questions, the couple fled the room
dressed in long sleeved shirts and scarves to find a quiet place to study.
And talk.
===============================================================================
Alistair sat on the floor of the slightly drafty but deserted alcove, his back
against the wall. The space was small enough that his legs, stretched out,
almost touched the other side, against which Gilbert sat. It was not a space
for getting work done, but for talking in relative privacy. Alistair cast a
spell to keep their words from traveling beyond this space, nothing as involved
as Matthew's barrier but effective in a pinch.
He waited for Gilbert to get settled before starting, "Where do ye want ta
start?"
Gilbert shrugged. "How about the long overdue topic? Apparently, we've been
oblivious."
"Wha' is there ta say about that, Gilbert? We both thought tha other wasn't
interested. Now we're here." Alistair didn't see the point in talking over
those years of pining. He was happy with where they were now and would rather
leave it at that than drudge up some long past history that could fuck this up.
"There's a lot to say and I lot I don't understand. When did you know?"
Alistair scoffed, because there could be a lot of answers to that question.
"Know wha'?"
"That you wanted to be with me? When did you first realize it? And why…why
didn't you say anything?"
He clinched his jaw and looked away from Gilbert's gaze. His friend knew him
too well for him to get away with a lie but the truth was…painful. "I was
thirteen. I knew I wanted ta date ye by tha end of our second year. Ye can
guess why I didn't tell ye."
"What?But, you didn't…I had no idea."
"Why are ye surprised? Ye were how I figured out I wasn't straight. Surely, ye
remember how I clung ta ye tha' semester."
"But you were so distant third year." Gilbert said, looking like his world had
been turned upside down. "You stopped hugging me or touching me at all. I
thought you were sick, or that I had done something to upset you."
"I thought ye were straight an' I had…I wasn't okay yet with tha fact tha' I
wasn't. I wanted ta touch ye, so I stopped doin' it. Third year was…bad." That
was an understatement. He'd hated himself that year, for how his body changed
and started reacting to his best friend without his permission, for how he
sometimes couldn't stop his eyes from following his every movement. But he'd
never hated Gilbert.
"Fourth year had been different though. You were…different." Gilbert said,
scooting forward to be closer to him. Sitting with his legs crossed now, he
reached out and took Alistair's hand.
"Tha's because tha summer before was utter shite. Ye know tha'." Gilbert knew
that that was the last summer he spent with his uncle. He even knew that his
uncle had verbally abused him, though his grandmother had stepped in before it
could escalate any further than that, thank God. But he didn't know that it
started because his uncle had caught Alistair with a local boy in an alley. He
hadn't minded the girls, but that one boy, the one with hair just a shade
darker than Gilbert's and the same lanky frame that had adorned his friend at
age fourteen…that had been too much. His uncle had always resented being
saddled with "Mor's demon spawn," but it had never been as bad as it had that
summer. It wasn't even that he had done something wrong; he had been a kid too
smart for his own good and bored out of his mind. He told his older brother,
the month before Charles started his last year at Hogwarts, that he was
starting to get scared. The day he got the letter, Charles had apparated to him
and told his uncle, in no uncertain terms, that he would hand custody over to
their Gran immediately and that Alistair was leaving with him. His uncle was
still banned from holiday gatherings, though no one but those directly involved
knew why.
Alistair supposed that Charles was the only other person in his family outside
of his Gran he might actually care if he disappointed.
Gilbert squeezed his hand, bringing him back to the present. "Yes, I know. But
that year, you were so…above it all? Like you stopped giving a shit about what
people thought of you."
"I did."
"You don't know, I guess, what seeing that did to me. It was like you were
untouchable. Even as we flew as partners and were best friends, it felt like I
was losing you." That was the year they had tried out for the Quidditch team,
surprising everyone by getting both of the open spots as beaters as Francis and
Antonio became the seeker and chaser. They had gained in social status that
year, though it never really phased Alistair much. "I couldn'tlose you."
Alistair stared at him, an answer to a mystery falling into place at last. "Is
tha' why ye asked me ta kiss ye tha' first time? Because ye thought ye were
losin' me?"
"Yeah. I knew you weren't interested in me for anything more permanent—"
"Oh, but I was!"
"—well I thought you weren't. And I thought using the excuse that we hadn't
kissed anyone yet would work. It did, too."
Alistair stared at him. "Gilly…ye know yer weren't me first kiss, right?"
The way he froze indicated that no, he hadn't known. "Who?"
Alistiar shrugged. "A lass back in Scotland. I needed ta know if I only liked
boys. But I would have jumped at tha chance ta kiss ye then, me first or no."
"I didn't know that!" Even in the slightly dimmed light of the alcove, Alistair
could see his blush. "You just seemed to take it in stride. It makes sense now
that I know I wasn't your first but…I'd realized what my feelings meant the
year before, but you were so distant and I didn't know how to reach you. I
needed an excuse to touch you by then, so I made one up."
Another piece of the puzzle of the last two years fell into place. "You've made
up excuses ta touch me ever since. Tha's why ye verbalized a reason ta touch me
every time ye did for more than a few seconds before yesterday. God, Gilbert, I
thought would only ever touch me because ye hadta do somethin', not because ye
wanted ta."
"…I didn't want you to know. How I felt about you, I mean. I thought you would
have laughed before breaking off our friendship."
You beautiful idiot, Alistair thought, resisting the urge to pull at his hair.
In what universe would Iever have left you?"Is tha' why ye started makin' out
with everythin' tha' moved? If so, ye did a damn good job because I had clue."
Gilbert flinched but said, "Like you did any better."
"I didn't say I did. I needed a distraction and I won't apologize for tha'.
I've loved ye since I was barely thirteen. I wanted ye ta be happy an' I didn't
make ye happy. I coped. I thought ye didn't want me romantically, so I tried ta
let ye go when I thought ye found someone ye did."
"Eliza, you mean."
"And Mattie."
They stared at each other, the years of misunderstanding finally catching up to
them. Gilbert leaned forward and gave Alistair a gentle, loving kiss. When he
pulled away, he said, "I knew I loved you the first time you kissed me, just
like that. It scared the shit out of me because I didn't think you would ever
love me back."
"Joke's on us, then." Alistair kissed him then, deep and unhurried. Then he
said against his mouth, "Now tha' tha's settled…"
Gilbert gave him one last peck on the mouth before leaning back and saying, "We
should talk about what Matthew's hiding from us. I have an idea, but it's
pretty out there."
Alistair's mouth twisted a little to the side. "Maybe not as out there as ye
think. As I see it, his venom is coded specificallyta us…"
"And we had those pretty unique visions."
"He calms at our touch, but we are tha only things tha' can set him off without
warnin'."
"We crave his touch when we're around him. I was able to start his maturation
process months too early."
"He seemed certain tha' he was only supposed ta have one partner, and Vargas
knew him bitin' us would convince him otherwise…"
"We have spousal privileges, for fuck's sake."
They let the information hang between them for a beat. Then Alistair said, "I
think tha word we're lookin' fer is 'soulmates.' Or maybe 'soulbonded.'"
Gilbert shook his head and sighed. "That should sound cheesy and poetic but,
mostly? It just sounds right. We probably are a little off and are missing some
nuance, but that sounds right. I have no problem with it."
Alistair raised his eyebrows at him. "Ye think I do?"
"No, but Matthew is reallyworried about telling us for some reason."
"Ye think it has somethin' ta do with his birthdays? Because Longbottom all but
told us somethin' will happen on his sixteenth and we knowat least part of wha'
happens on his seventeenth."
"What do we do, Scottie? I don't want him to think he has to worry about these
things alone."
Alistair sighed, agreeing but… "We should probably wait ta bring it up. We did
just start datin' yesterday. He probably thinks we would freak out if he
brought up tha soulmate thing. Hell, he fainted when I mentioned weddin' bands.
Maybe he's not ready ta consider tha long term."
"Do…do you think he wishes he had different soulmates? That he wishes it wasn't
us?" Gilbert asked quietly, carefully, but Alistair flinched at the thought
anyway.
"No," He said automatically, then had to think of a reason to back up his
denial. "This mornin', before ye woke up, I asked him how he felt. Ye know what
his answer was?"
Gilbert shook his head and even the memory of Matthew's expression made
Alistair smile. "Happy. He's happy with us, Gilly. We just have ta make sure he
stays tha' way."
===============================================================================
Matthew was not expecting this to go well.
Still, he smiled as his brother approached him late Monday afternoon. His day
had gone well up until that point: he'd gotten enough work done to only need to
use Longbottom's healer's note in one class, he ate often enough to keep the
gnawing hunger at bay, and he'd gotten to kiss both Gilbert and Alistair when
they had walked him to his classes. On top of that, Alistair asked him on a
date! Some people had shot him utterly shocked looks, but no one had said
anything to him or seemed to wish him ill…yet. And no one called him out on
looking older now than he did last week, though some had been looking at him
strangely at moments. Hey, small victories! Now he just had to tell his brother
that not only was he dating two people he hated, but that they were his mates.
Yep, low expectations were key to approaching this conversation. At least he
could have dinner with his mates and friends immediately after this.
Alfred's eyes narrowed as he saw him and really took him in. His first words
were, "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"
Because you're not entitled to the minutia of his life, Matthew thought
immediately, only to admit to himself that this particular detail wasn't
remotely small. "I'm telling you now, aren't I?" Matthew looked around him.
They were in a usually disserted, dead-end hallway of the castle, but sound
could and did travel in stone corridors. And who knew how much the portraits
actually listened in on student conversations. The lone picture in the hall was
a large landscape devoid of people, but you never knew. "Let me put up a
privacy sound barrier, then I'll tell you more."
Matthew did so and the second the barrier was complete, Alfred said, more
heatedly, "Why didn't you tell me? You had to have a good reason. What it is?"
Matthew pursed his lips at him. "Because I wanted to first, you know, explain
that I wasn't human to him before telling you. To maybe tell my mate why we
shouldn't touch much in public anymore because my eyes will fucking glow?"
His heartrate sped and Matthew closed his eyes, breathing deeply. I will not
lose my composure in the middle of a hallway. I will not start raging at my
brother for being an impatient, selfish idiot.
"How long ago was that?"
Matthew clinched his jaw. "A week and a half."
"Seriously? What took you so long?"
"Well excuse mefor being confused as to why I wanted someone else and then
going into a fucking rage about it!"
"You had a rage? Already? Why didn't you call me, Mattie? I would have helped
you." Alfred said, calming at the knowledge, visibly concerned. "Are you okay?"
Matthew blew out a breath. "I wasn't but now I am. I just aged a little because
of how long it took to burn out."
"How long?" Alfred said warily, like he was afraid of the answer.
"Four hours."
"What the fuck, Matthew! Why didn't your mate help you?"
"He didn't know. Theydidn't know. I refused to let them be called."
"That's super dangerous, what the hell? Wait…them? As in more than one and not
non-binary?"
"Yeah. Two, to be exact."
Alfred gaped at him. "I didn't think it was possible."
"Neither did I."
"Have you told mom yet?"
"Yeah, sent an owl last night."
"Wow." Alfred leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest, face
serious. "I don't know if I should say congrats or 'I'm sorry.' Shit,Mattie.
Next year will be hell. They're not graduating this year, are they?"
"No, they're sixth years."
Alfred blew out a breath and looked marginally relieved. "That's good, at
least. They will be able to help you with the worst of it, though it will
probably cause its own problems." It was encouraging that Alfred saw the root
of the issues and was thinking sensibly. When he didn't let his emotions rule
him, he was insightful and easy to talk to. "But, Mattie, if you refused to
call them, why didn't you call me? I would have come immediately."
Matthew shrugged. "I honestly didn't think to call you."
"Ouch, bro."
"What? I was contained in the hospital and Lovi helped me through the worst of
it. Then my mates were called to help me recover." Gross oversimplification,
but good enough. "Just so you know, protocol now is that mates are called if we
start raging, no matter what. Longbottom was…not pleased when she found out how
effective they could be at calming me and that I refused their help."
"That's good to know and all, but I still have no clue who my mate is and…hey,
you lied to me, that day we got the letters. You thought you knew who your mate
was at the time, didn't you?"
Now came the hard part. "Yes."
"Why didn't you tell me, Mattie?" Alfred ground out, clearly angry.
"Because I knew you wouldn't like it."
Alfred approached him, glaring. Where he would have loomed over him a week
earlier with the gesture, they were nearly eye to eye now. "Who. Are. They."
"You need to step away from me, Alfred, and be very careful about what you
say." Matthew said, low and controlled, anger just under the surface because
these were his mates they were talking about. He let his eyes flash a glowing
blue in warning, let that small bit of anger out, before closing his eyes and
controlling himself. That show of strength cost him, left his fuse so much
shorter than it should have been, but it did get Alfred to back up, eyes wary
with caution now.
"Who?" Alfred demanded and he did not appreciate his tone in the least.
Matthew remembered a conversation they had weeks earlier and his lips curled
into a snarl. "I believe you referred to them as 'definitely the worst.'"
Some part of Matthew reminded him that he was not actually trying to start a
fight with his brother. As he watched Alfred work through his words and come to
a conclusion that soured his expression with disgust, he conveniently forgot
about that. Then, just because he could, he dropped the concealing spell he had
on his neck.
Alfred looked sick. "No."
Matthew smirked. "Oh, yes."
"No!" Alfred said, human eyes blazing, like his denial would change anything.
"You are notmated to those Slytherin—"
Alfred abruptly cut himself off at the slight cock of Matthew's head as he
heard the beginning of an insult. His eyes burnedas he looked over his glasses,
but he had his back to the hallway, the only exit. He had unintentionally
cornered his brother. He was utterly unconcerned with how animalistic that
small gesture had been, was simply waiting for Alfred to finish his sentence
and damn himself. It seemed that Alfred realized that, too, and he stayed
silent, shaking his head back and forth.
After several tense moments, Matthew said lowly, "I ammated to those
Slytherins. Gilbert Beilschmidt and Alistair Kirkland are mine and there's not
a damn thing you can do about it."
Matthew needed to control himself. This was his brother. His twin brother!He
didn't want to hurt him…okay, yes he did, but he didn't want him hurt. He
stepped back from Alfred, to the very edge of his sound barrier, and just
breathed for a minute, counting to 30.
When he opened his eyes again, seeing clearly through his glasses once more,
Alfred had a determined edge to his face. He said, "You're wrong."
Matthew raised his eyebrows but his voice was the definition of serene as he
answered, "I'm really not."
"Mom got the date wrong. She said it wasn't certain."
Matthew shook his head. "Mom's right. Gilbert just started my process early."
His expression shifted into something scarily close to hate. "How?"
"I'm not giving you details of my sex life." That had been uncalled for, but
Alfred's affronted expression was a little hilarious. Considering how many
times Matthew had inadvertently heard details of Alfred's escapades, this was
long overdue. Also, this, no they were the part of his life he wouldn't
compromise. He had partially done it for years, keeping his attraction to
himself, from his brother, denying it entirely when it came to Alistair, and he
found that he was done.
"They will not be my brothers-in-law."
"No, but that has more to do with the law than your sensibilities, Alfred." He
remembered what Alistair said about his vision and added, "And it doesn't mean
we won't wear each other's rings."
"You won't be their plaything, Mattie. I've watched how they've used people and
thrown them away without a second thought. I won't let them use you like that."
Matthew's eyes hardened and he was struggling to maintain his Zen. "You're
right; I won't be their toy. I am their mate. They don't know it yet, but I do.
I am proof enough. And don't act like people didn't know what they were getting
into with them. I've heard the same rumors you have, Alfred. People just wanted
a fun time and that was all they offered."
Alfred shook his head at him again, eyes zeroing in on his oh-so-marked neck
again. "Is that what they told you? Because, honestly, you look like their
leftovers."
A muscle in his face twitched, but he controlled himself. Barely. "Say what you
want about me, but they didn't do anything I didn't ask for. And they didn't
need to tell me anything, Alfred. They are not evil. They are not perfect and
neither am I. But I was made for them and you need to accept that that has
absolutely nothing to do with you or what you want."
Matthew had a thought and frowned at his brother. "Really, why are you this
surprised? I've been openly dating Gilbert for weeks, hell, almost two months."
"I heard some rumors but didn't think you were stupid enough for them to be
true! You can bet that I would have gotten you away from him before this
happened if I had known."
"Excuse me? You would have kept me from my mate if you had known we were
dating? Is thatwhat you just said to me?"
"He wouldn't have been your mate then," Alfred said, that that made it better
or even a lick of sense.
"What the fuck would you have done if you had torn us apart and then my dream
on our birthday confirmed that he and Alistair are my mates? Would you have
explained to him why you did it or just let me suffer?" Alfred opened his mouth
to respond but Matthew put a hand up, not wanting to hear it. "No, you know
what? I'm losing the will to keep myself from beating the shit out of you, so
this conversation is over. If you were anyonebut my brother, you would be
eating through a tube right now. I told you this as a courtesy and to let you
know that you need to leave them alone. So leave them alone."
Matthew waved his wand to end the spell and then started walking away. When
Alfred started walking with him, Matthew said, "You need to be away from me
right now, Alfred. I am fresh out of patience."
Alfred stopped walking but said, "I have a game against them on Saturday. What
exactly do you expect me to do, Mattie? Are they allowed to aim for me but I
can't do the same."
"Yep." Matthew said, popping the 'p' sound deliberately and still walking away.
"That's bullshit," Alfred shot at him.
Matthew rounded on him, glaring from twenty feet away. "No, it's not. Consider
the effects, Alfred. Fucking think for once. What would I do if you were hurt
in a game? Now, what would I do if theywere hurt in a game?"
"So that's how it is, now? You care about those two…Slytherins more than your
own twin?" He was angry, but he was learning at least.
"You're the one trying to draw a line in the sand, Alfred, not me. You read
mom's letter and you know how I'll react. Don't try to make me choose, because
we both know it's not a choice at all."
"Why don't you understand, Matthew? Can't you see I'm trying to help?"
Matthew was pissed, so pissed, but he would not physically attack his brother.
He. Would. Not. But there were other ways of lashing out. "No. I see you doing
what you want and damning everyone else around you to the consequences, like
you've always done. Did you know that I liked Gilbert for years before we
started dating but I was afraid to tell you? Or that I liked Alistair, too, but
was too afraid to look at it closely because I know how you feel about Arthur?
I didn't even admit it out loud to my best friend for a year. Hell, mom wrote
me a completely separate letter because she knew I liked Gil and didn't know
how to tell you. Well, now you've been told."
Matthew turned back and walked towards the end of the hall. Alfred didn't
follow him. When he was about to round the corner, he paused and turned back
around. He saw the bitterness, distaste, and perceived betrayal on Alfred's
face and sighed. Then he called down the hall, not quite shouting, "If it
matters to you at all? I am happy. They make me happy."
He left before his twin could respond.
===============================================================================
If one more person tried to tell him his boyfriend was cheating on him today,
he was going lose it.
It wasn't that he didn't appreciate the concern, whether it was kind-hearted or
not, but they were all so off. They were also busy-bodies and, after the second
person didn't believe him when he told them the G-rated version of the truth,
he started responding with increasingly outlandish retorts. It had been fun at
first.
"And I'm descended from Prussian royalty," he'd said to Slytherin fourth-year.
(Yeah, right.)
"And I'm actually a monk," he'd said to a Ravenclaw sixth-year. (He considered
himself a sensualist, which was well known around the school.)
"And my best friend is Alfred Jones," he'd said to a disgusted Gryffindor
fifth-year. (That had been a particular favorite, and had been used multiple
times.)
"And I'm a Gryffindor," he'd said to a Hufflepuff seventh-year. (They had
looked at him pityingly but said nothing more. That was when he started to get
angry.)
The last time, he had completely lost his patience and asked, bluntly, "What's
my boyfriend's name?" He'd let the person verbally stumble for a bit before
saying, "Don't try to start shit unless you know the facts." He'd then stalked
away, annoyed.
He now sat in the Great Hall for dinner, head in his hands and back to the rest
of the room, trying to ignore the feeling of being gawked at. He startled when
a light hand trailed over his back in greeting. He knew who it was before
Matthew said, "Hey, angel. You feeling alight?"
He looked up to see Matthew's concerned face, blue eyes searching as if they
would be able to see what was troubling him if they tried hard enough, and
sighed. "Hey, Mattie. Can you do me a favor?"
"Sure." He answered easily, his entire being focused on him. Gilbert relaxed a
little and smiled at him.
"Can you kiss Scottie when he gets here?"
Matthew laughed a little, not quite believing his ears. "That's the favor?
Kissing Alistair?"
"Yes."
"Such a difficult task, but I'm sure I'll manage," He said with a confused
smile, leaning in to kiss him in greeting before settling onto the bench. "But
are you actually alright?"
"Yeah, just had a long day dealing with stupid people. How about you? How did
the talk with your brother go?"
Matthew grimaced. "About as well as I expected."
"That bad?"
"Worse. I may have…lost my temper. A bit."
Gilbert sat up, surprised. "Shit, Mattie. Are you okay? Do you need-?"
"I'm alright. I was just not very diplomatic. Probably should have brought Lovi
along as a chaperone. Or to at least yell at him so I didn't have to. He's been
wanting to do that since forever."
"I'm sorry, Liebling. I know you were hoping it would go well." He reached up
and began lightly massaging Matthew's neck. His boyfriend's head dropped with a
groan.
Antonio and Lovino arrived then, the latter shooting him a questioning look.
His only answer was to shake his head and mouth silently, "Alfred." Lovino's
face tightened in sudden anger, but he said nothing as they sat down.
Matthew grumbled, "He's such a fucking idiot."
"What did he say?" Gilbert asked, glancing up to see Alistair approaching them,
a pinched look of concern furrowing his brow as he took in Matthew.
"He didn't believe me when I said that we were together, like, at all."
"What?" Gilbert looked at him then, hand stilling. "We've been dating for
weeks."
"Apparently everybody but my brother knew that."
"Knew wha'?" Alistair asked, sitting on the other side of Matthew. Gilbert
could practically feel the tension in the room rise at the action, could almost
make out the furious whispers of those behind them. "Wha' are we talkn' about?"
"How my twin is an idiot." Matthew looked to their boyfriend at he spoke.
Alistair raised an eyebrow at that. "Well, tha's certainly common knowledge,
but wha' does he not know this time?"
Matthew smiled at him, leaning towards him and tilting his face up in blatant
invitation. Alistair kissed him briefly, without hesitation, and a glass broke
somewhere in the room.
There was a collective moment of quiet in the Hall and Alistair looked around,
confused. Gilbert just smirked. Alistair asked, "Wha's botherin' tha masses?"
Gilbert answered, deadpan, "Their own incompetence." He was pretty sure he
heard Lovino snort in amusement.
"Tha's fair. Now, wha' does Alfred not know?" Alistair took Matthew's hand.
Matthew looked between the two of them. "Am I missing something here?"
"Don't worry, Birdie. I took care of it."
"…Okay." Matthew sighed. "He didn't believe me when I said that we all were
together, or even that Gilbertand I were dating. Not even with me looking like,
you know, I aged or anything." He said that last at a whisper.
"Wha' exactly did he think caused it then?" Alistair asked, incredulous. He
always did have a difficult time when people believed something against all
obvious evidence.
"He said that the start date just be wrong. I told him he was being an idiot
and the conversation went downhill after that. Then again it hadn't exactly
started on high ground. We hit rock bottom really fast." Matthew slumped,
defeated. "He hates you both for some reason."
"Is he going to be a problem?"
Matthew straightened at the question and said, steel in his voice, "If it is,
I'll handle it. He's my problem, not yours."
Food appeared on the table and Matthew dug in, his appetite still going strong.
Gilbert hesitated, meeting Alistair's glance, and shook his head. There was
nothing they could really do for now. Maybe Alfred would come to his senses…?
Nah, too reasonable for him.
They would just have to wait and see.
But for now…
"Mattie, I don't think I've ever introduced you to West. I should do that."
"Wait, what? Now?"
"No, Liebling, eat your dinner. I meant later."
(Gilbert figured that Matthew needed to be reminded that sometimes brothers
were a good thing. Ludwig's slight bewilderment but easy acceptance did seem to
make him happy, at least.)
===============================================================================
Alistair would have preferred that his first date with Matthew take place
somewhere more scenic and at a less hectic time for his boyfriend. However, he
also didn't want to waste time waiting for a more opportune moment, so he made
do.
He'd skipped dinner in the Great Hall, opting instead to eat from his personal
cache of snacks to give himself time to prepare. It was Friday, the evening
before his last Quidditch game of the season, and he probably shouldn't be
doing this for his own reasons. But he wasn't really concerned about the game
and he was emotionally invested in getting to know Matthew more.
So he had set up the one place that he knew was completely private, cleaning
out a space large enough for them to be together comfortably. He'd saved the
sweets he knew Matthew liked the best and brought them with him. He even pulled
a couple of favors to have the kitchen house elves make a small surprise. He
had used every cleaning spell his grandmother had taught him to get the room
looking less like the glorified storage space it was. Occasionally, only the
ghosts came down here to have big gatherings, particularly to celebrate
someone's death day. Usually, though, it was as quiet as a tomb.
Gilbert knew about this place and he was the one leading Matthew here. They
could arrive at any moment and Alistair found himself anxiously triple checking
that the space looked acceptable. He had brought in a blanket that he had
stored in his trunk, soft pillows that he had been practicing conjuring for
days in preparation, and a bunch of candles that made the entire set-up a fire
hazard. He made sure to put them as far from the fabric as possible. They
wouldn't run out of air due to a number of vents around the place, but the
concern had made him check. One would have thought there would be light
fixtures in a place with so much air flow but apparently not. There might have
been a free standing torch or two at some point, but not recently.
The overall effect was nice enough, the color scheme of red and black maybe a
little dramatic with the candle light. Maybe if he had thought to somehow
procure some flowers—
The hidden door opened, a sudden shift in the air giving it away, and Alistair
whirled. Matthew came through the door first and stopped short with a gasp,
taking in all that he had done before finally looking at him. Then he smiled
wide and walked to him, closing the distance between them quickly. Alistair was
expected a quick kiss hello, maybe a hug. But Matthew held them together, lips
insistent and body speaking the kind of language Alistair liked to hear. What
else could he do but respond in kind?
Gilbert's low whistle of appreciation got them to stop, Alistair pulling away
with a murmured, "Hello ta ye, too."
Matthew just smiled at him and ducked his head. Alistair looked up to see his
other boyfriend still at the entrance, a soft expression on his face as he
looked at them. He lifted a brow to him, asking, you have something to say?
Gilbert smirked then, then gestured to the space Alistair had cleared. "Nice
set-up."
"Thanks," he responded dryly, fighting off a blush. Maybe I had done too much?
Gilbert saw something on his face and rolled his eyes, approaching them.
Matthew looked up from where he was still hugging him and said, "I appreciate
it. It's great, Alistair."
"I wasn't teasing, Scottie. I think it's cute. I'll have to think of something
just as involved for our date." Gilbert kissed him then, both a greeting and a
farewell. He shifted a little to briefly kiss Matthew before turning for the
door. Alistair separated from Matthew, only leaving his hand in his, as Gilbert
said, "Don't do anything I wouldn't." Then he was gone, closing the entrance
behind him.
Alistair led Matthew to the blanket, both of them discarding their shoes and
getting comfortable as he asked, "How was yer day?"
"Better now. Nothing happened outside of the usual. Alfred hasn't made a
problem of himself, so that's good. Everyone is starting to get really stressed
about O.W.L.s though. I wish I could fast forward a month and a half so I
wouldn't have to worry about them anymore." Matthew sighed as he leaned back to
rest on his hands. "How about yours?"
Alistair shrugged. "Nothin' out of tha ordinary but this. Not every day tha' ye
have yer first date."
Matthew frowned. "You mean with me?"
"I mean in general. I've never been on a date before. Is this…not a normal set
up?" Alistair let a fraction of his anxiety into his voice. This was Matthew,
his boyfriend and probably his soulmate of some kind. He wanted to let him in
more than he already did.
Matthew's expression softened and he beamed at him. "It's perfect."
Alistair smiled at him and the expression was as easy as breathing. "Good. I
know ye ate already, but I have some snacks and—"
"Oh, my God. Are those Timbits?"
Alistair laughed a little. "Not quite. I couldn't figure out a way ta get them
here fresh. But they wereinspired by them. I was not sure what flavors ye liked
but I asked fer a couple an'—"
"Alistair." Matthew was leaning forward now, in Alistair's space. He was damn
near in his lap with an amused, knowing smile on his lips.
"Er, yes?"
Matthew kissed him, long and deep. Alistair didn't know what had brought this
on, but he wasn't complaining. Really, he wasn't.
Matthew pulled away slowly, leaving Alistair a little dazed. For someone who
had only been kissing people for about two months, he sure was good at that.
Matthew settled back into his own space, smirk on his lips and eyes gone
glowing. He said, very clearly, "We are going to have a wonderful first date. I
don't know what your plan was, but I want to know more about you. And, by the
end, I want you to teach me how to go down you. And then I want to practice."
"Over some doughnut holes?" Alistair asked, shocked and oh no, why did I say
that? Oh God, Ilikethis plan, why am I questioning this?
"They're Timbits, honey, pay attention. And also for the work you put into
setting this up and how understanding you've been. And because I've been
wanting to blow you for a very long time. We don't have to do—"
"I want ta!" Alistair assured quickly. "I really do. I was only surprised.
Sounds great ta me."
Matthew grinned at him, "I'm glad." He kissed him briefly again then moved to
help himself to the doughnut holes. Maybe Timbits was a Canadian thing?
A thought occurred and Alistair chuckled. When he was shot a questioning look
he said, "It occurs ta me tha' we did things a bit out of order."
"What do you mean?"
"Mattie, this is our first date but we've already slept together and are in a
committed relationship."
"Hmm, that's true." Matthew settled back in one spot, having picked his share
of the food and reclining on a mound of pillows. "But we did have a long time
of playing the game if-we-act-like-we're-not-into-each-other-then-we-won't-be.I
thought I would go insane last week. What made you start acting differently, by
the way? We were doing a good job denying things until then."
Alistair popped a sweet into his mouth and hummed, thinking about it. After a
moment he said, "I had ta admit ta meself the constant urge ta touch ye ta
figure out wha' ye were. Once I let meself think of it, it was harder ta
ignore. Tha lengths we took ta not touch just made me more aware of ye and I
only wanted ye more. If ye had been with anyone but Gilly…" He frowned at that,
not liking the fact that he might be the kind of person to poach on a friend's
significant other under any circumstance. Oh, that was not a comforting thought
at all.
"What?" Matthew asked, seeing his shift in mood.
"I never wanted ta be tha' person, but I might have been fer ye. God, I thought
I would choke on me jealousy. And sure, it would have started with me allowing
an innocent touch. But wha' if yer eyes had not changed a week ago? Would I
have started touchin' ye casually? Would it have escalated?"
"No. We both care for Gilbert too much to have allowed that to happen." Matthew
said, taking his hand. "If my eyes hadn't changed, I would have been skittish
around you because I knew it was too dangerous to let us touch again. It had
been such a small touch, but I had felt like I was drowning, Alistair. I would
have tried to get us to talk about what was going on explicitly, to stop things
from going too far."
"So we never would have been together if yer eyes hadn't given ye away?" He
tried to keep his tone neutral, but he probably didn't succeed. Considering a
future where he never would have had this was…unpleasant.
"Maybe. Maybe not." Matthew smiled his bittersweet smile and shook his head.
"Lovi had been waiting for me to come back that night. Apparently we weren't
being subtle that things were getting tense and he was expecting one of us to
break soon. He was prepared with cookies and a lecture about how I could be
with bothof you if we just talked to each other."
Alistair snorted. "Yeah, we got tha same speech when he called us in after yer
rage, though I doubt he gave ye tha shovel talk."
"He threatened you?" Matthew's eyes had gone sharp and maybe he should minimize
damage on this one. He owed Vargas for getting them together after all.
"No, nothin' like tha'. He was worried about ye an' it showed. Ye gave everyone
a fright, Mattie."
"Yeah, I know. But enough about that. Tell me something I don't know about
you."
Alistair smiled at him, more than ready to move on from the past. "We've talked
about how ye shouldn't give me free reign on things like this."
"Oh, fine." Matthew rolled his eyes but his mouth twisted in amusement.
"Favorite musician?"
"Arctic Monkeys. Though tha' may change when I can actually listen ta music
again on a device more modern than a gramophone. Ye?"
"Lana del Rey."
"Really?"
"Yep. Born to Die is the most perfect album I've ever heard and I will fight
you on this. Formation may be the only one better."
"Okay, tha's fair. I tend ta lean towards Floggin' Molly and MS MR but
Formationwas a masterpiece in storytellin'."
"Thank God you have good taste. Gilbert still hasn't listened to it."
"We're fixin' tha' once we can use tech again. The one thing I hate about
Hogwarts is tha lack of tech. I started teachin' meself how ta code a couple of
summers ago an' it sucks havin' ta reteach meself things."
"I didn't know that. I know basically nothing about computers. What does that
involve?" Since Matthew actually looked interested, Alistair started sketching
the basics of coding, excited to talk about it after so long.
After some length of time, he noticed that Matthew was just smiling at him
gently. He might have been talking about this for too long. He summarized what
he was saying and then said, cheeks heating, "Sorry. I'll stop. It's been a
while."
Matthew's smile widened and he said, "No need to apologize, hon. I like hearing
you talk about it, even though I was lost about a minute in. I've never heard
you talk about anything the way you talk about computer languages. You can keep
going, if you want."
Alistair shook his head but smiled at him openly. "Hon?"
"I guess that's a thing now. Gilbert's my angel and you're my honey; you're
sweet and everything's better with you."
What could he even say to that? He smiled at him, shaking his head. "Yer a
little ridiculous, ye know tha'?"
Matthew beamed at his sappy tone, face alight with the kind of happiness that
Alistair was sure he would kill to maintain. "You love it."
"Yeah, I do." Warmth spread in his chest and he couldn't help a light laugh.
"No one would understand yer pet names fer us. They're a bit out of character."
"No, they're not. If people can't see that, it's their loss. And Gilbert was
right the other day; it doesn't matter if people don't understand us. They
won't need to. The only thing they need to do," Matthew's smile sharpened and
Alistair felt a thrill at his expression, "is stay the fuck out of our way."
===============================================================================
"Welcome back, Scottie. Nice of you to remember to sleepbefore our
gametomorrow."
"Gilbert, we are marrying tha' boy."
(The sound of two people choking in the background.)
"O-oh? You say that after one date…?"
"Aye, 'cause I'm not stupid. Move over."
"What did he do?"
"Be himself."
(The sound of shifting cloth, followed by a brief wet sound: a kiss.)
(Muttered quietly in Spanish: Oh, God, please don't fuck right now. Natalia
will kill us all if we don't sleep.)
"You taste like him and…dessert."
"Apparently tha way ta his heart is doughnut holes. 'Night."
"…Huh. Goodnight, Alistair."
(Silence. Shifting cloth. Sighs of relief.)
===============================================================================
"What the fuck?" Gilbert asked aloud as he deflected yet another bludger in
self-defense. He made it count by aiming at the nearest Gryffindor chaser but
this was starting to become a problem.
He looked to the source of his ills and scowled. Alfred, from his spot across
the pitch gave him a rude gesture in response before shooting off, following
the clump of chasers fighting over the quaffle. What the hell is he
doing?Gilbert wondered. Is he actually trying to hurt me? Even knowing that
Mattie would lose his shit and come after him if he succeeded?
Alistair started flying towards him, breaking their carefully arraigned
positions, but Gilbert didn't try to motion him back. It only took him a few
seconds to be hovering next to him, close enough to talk while watching his
back. "Ye alright?"
Gilbert sighed and kept his eyes on the game but said, "For now. My wrist is
starting to hurt, though." That was an understatement; his wrist was damn near
throbbing. It was one thing to hit a free flying bludger. It was quite another
to redirect one hit at youover and over again, even with the dodging he did. He
had half a mind to switch his batting hand. He practiced with both, after all,
but he was less accurate with his left hand. Getting him to switch arms would
have been a decent strategy, but Gilbert doubted anything that clear-headed was
driving Alfred.
He could see Alistair shifting on his broom out of the corner of his eye. He
knew how bad the pain had to be for Gilbert to say something and was subtly
telegraphing his agitation. "Tha feck is he playin' at because it sure as
shiteisn't Quidditch."
"I think he knows Matthew isn't here and this is the last time he could come at
me like this without getting in trouble before the year ends."
"Tha' makes no sense. Mattie isn't here, but Alfred has ta land sometime. He's
gonna be pissed ta find out he was tryin' ta hurt ye. Also, why jus' ye? Wha'
am I, chopped liver?"
Gilbert smirked and took a moment to look over at Alistair. "You feeling
neglected, Scottie?"
Alistair smirked back, eyes dancing with mirth. "Feck ye."
"Maybe la-"
Gilbert didn't have time to process what the sudden widening in Alistair's eyes
meant before his partner bodily shoved him to the side, nearly knocking him off
his broom. Then he heard a thud, a sickening crack, and an all-too-familiar
shout. He righted himself and was at Alistair's side almost immediately.
Alistair was hunched over his broom, face contorted with pain. His breathing
was labored and his right arm hung useless at his side. His tunic should not
have been laying that way. "Alistair-!"
"I'm fine," the red head ground out through clinched teeth, lifting his face in
a snarl of rage towards where the bludger had come from. Gilbert followed his
line of sight and wasn't surprised to see Alfred staring at them, a look of
shock on his face. Then he paled as Gilbert focused on him and let the
righteous anger fill him. It was one thing to go after him. It was another to
hurt Alistair.
Apparently, he wasn't the only one pissed. Arthur, having heard whatever
commentary Feliks was giving on the events, had rounded on his teammate and was
speaking to him tersely. By Arthur's standards, that that was throwing a temper
tantrum. Gilbert answered Alistair with, "You're not. You at the very least
have a dislocated shoulder. You know team rules."
"Feck team rules. This is our last game an' tha' bastard is still in play. He
had been aimin' at ye, Gilly. It was damn near a head-shot."
Gilbert went cold at that but shook his head all the same. "Doesn't matter.
I'll be more careful and it looks like Jones is being chewed out by the one
person who can actually make him behave. You're grounded. Go get checked out
and let our Mattie see you."
Natalia flew out of formation to approach them abruptly, demanding, "Kirkland,
why the fuck are you still in the air with that shoulder? Get on the ground and
stop distracting Beilschmidt." Just like that, she was gone, falling seamlessly
back into the movements of their team.
"What our captain said," Gilbert helpfully supplied, even as he reached out to
touch Alistair's face, completely aware that he was still playing the most
heavily attended Quidditch game of the year and not caring. "Go get yourself
checked out."
Alistair went to shake his head but stilled as pain clearly shot through him.
"Sap." He said before finally angling his broom towards the medic station.
"Asshole." Gilbert shot back with a small smile. When he saw that Alistair was
indeed on the ground and talking to a field medic, he turned his attention back
towards the game. He located Alfred and let his face show all the anger and
vicious determination that filled him. His lips curled, but the result was not
an expression remotely close to a smile.
Alfred wanted to hurt him? Fine. Alfred didn't care who got caught in the
crossfire? Okay. Alfred was doing this despite knowing the toll it would take
on Matthew? Sure.
Gilbert was going to make him wish he had never heard of Quidditch. He would
humiliate him and his team in front of 90% of the school. Then he would let his
boyfriend take a shot at his brother.
Fuck being careful. He wanted revenge.
His wrist didn't bother him much anymore.
===============================================================================
Something was wrong, wrong, wrong. Matthew knew it in his bones. He had been
waiting in his empty dorm room for Lovino to come back with news on how the
Quidditch match went, studying as much as he was able. Now he was pacing, a
rippling energy crawling under his skin as he desperately tried to control
himself. He was grateful Vash and Nate were also at the game, because his eyes
were a lost cause and had changed five minutes ago. As it was, he was trying
desperately to control his breathing to starve off a full blown rage, mind
whirring as he asked himself in a panic, what was wrong?
Then, as Lovino burst breathlessly through the door, he finally asked something
that had been almost too awful to contemplate, that his mind had shied away
from because there was no hope of control down this path. He felt his fangs
descend as he snarled out, "Who?"
Lovino swallowed audibly but managed, "He's going to be alright, he was
conscious and walking when they took him to the hospital."
My mate is hurt. My mate. Matthew stalked towards the door, intent on going to
him, when Lovino stepped in his path. He hissed at him, voice still human, "You
would keep me from my mate?"
"No! No, I just wanted to walk you to him, help hide you." Lovino said hastily,
fear making his voice reedy.
Why would that matter? My mate is hurt and I am not there to protect him. "Why?
It would slow us—"
"You would care later." When Matthew just moved to push him aside, Lovino
quickly added, "People stopping you to stare at your eyes and teeth would slow
you down a hell of a lot more than just throwing on a pair of sunglasses and
walking with me to the hospital!"
Matthew processed the information coldly, considering the words and finding
them reasonable. When he made no further movement, Lovino bolted to his trunk
to withdraw a pair of sunglasses the Matthew distantly recognized as his
favorite pair and carefully offered them to him. He put them on and immediately
turned from the room, walking fast enough that Lovino had to trot to keep up
with him. As they made their way up the stairs, taking the most direct (but
mostly deserted) route to the clinic, Matthew asked again, "Who?"
"…Alistair. He-he saved Gilbert from being hit."
Matthew stopped abruptly and whirled on his friend. "Is Gilbert still playing?"
Is he still in danger? Why is he in danger? I must—
"Yes, but Alistairneeds you," Lovino said, obviously trying to distract him. It
worked, but only partially. He was being torn between the need to care for his
injured mate and the need to protect the one in immediate danger. Perhaps
sensing this, Lovino continued gently, "Gilbert can take care of himself and he
is with the rest of his team. Alistair only has you right now."
Matthew blinked then continued on his previous route to the hospital wing. He
didn't say another word as they passed several students who skipped up the game
to study or relax indoors. Most cast confused glances at the sunglasses, but
Lovino's glare sent their eyes skittering away. Matthew was beyond caring at
that point. He had to get to Alistair now.
His speed gradually increased until he was running and Lovino was struggling to
keep up. They made it to the hospital doors shortly thereafter and Matthew
threw the doors open. A nurse (Maria, his human self that was concerned with
niceties reminded him) at the front desk startled then immediately said after
recognizing him, "He's in the back room, dear."
Matthew distantly heard Lovino thanking her as he ran to the other end of the
wing and pushed the door open without knocking. Both Madam Longbottom and
Alistair (Alistair, Alistair, Alistair) snapped their eyes to the door, the
former recognizing the state Matthew was in and stepping away from the latter
entirely. The movement revealed his mate's shirtless torso, his right shoulder
and chest a worrying, enraging mess of red and purple. Matthew was at his side
in an instant and threw the sunglasses onto the bed as his hands fluttered
nervously over his mate. He didn't want to hurt him further and—
"Shush, leannan, I'm alright." Alistair reach for him with his left hand, and
Matthew clutched at it gently. He looked at the healer with wide eyes then and
went to ask if he could touch him more and what was wrong, only to have
clicking chirp emerge from his mouth. He then realized he had been making
similar distressed, clipped noises since seeing the damage on his mate's body.
Later, he might be embarrassed by that. At the moment, he mostly wanted his
answers and his sudden lack of speech was getting in the way of what he needed
to help Alistair.
He cleared his throat and tried again, concentrating this time. One raspy,
hissing word was all he could manage. "Touch?"
The Matron's eyes crinkled in pity. Softly, she said, "Yes, Matthew, go ahead,
but please be careful. Stay on his left side." Matthew nodded and climbed
silently over Alistair, viscerally aware of how much his movements were
jostling the bed and keeping an eye out of any sign of causing his mate further
discomfort.
"Fucking hell," came the soft voice of his best friend from the door as he
closed it. Matthew didn't bother looking up, settling himself to curl as much
as he could around Alistair. He made noises of concerned inquiry as he kissed
his cheek and nuzzled gently into his neck.
Alistair lightly chuckled as he took Matthew's hand in his and turned his head
to kiss the Veela's forehead. "I'm okay, Mattie. Madam Longbottom healed some
already."
Matthew tensed and his head shot up in alarm to look at the healer. He chirped
again in distress, saving his effort for words when it was most necessary.
She winced before saying, "He's going to be fine, Matthew. I have Alistair's
permission to share his medical status with you but Lovino…" She trailed off,
looking at his friend.
Lovino blew out a breath and said, "No worries, I'm gone. I just wanted to make
sure he got here."
He shot Matthew a highly concerned look as he moved to exit and Matthew, a
little more mentally himself now that he was with Alistair, managed, "Lo. Vi?"
The Italian turned around and he continued with a hissed, "Thanks."
The corner of Lovino's mouth kicked up as he said, "Anything for you, maple
bastard. And keep the shades, I have a feeling you'll need them more than me."
He left then, closing the door behind him. Matthew felt a quiet, removed joy
and gratitude for having a friend like him, then turned back to Madam
Longbottom. She said, "Alistair suffered a dislocated shoulder and two cracked
ribs. His shoulder is back in place, but I still need to fix his ribs. The
bruising is bad right now and I will be able to alleviate the worst of it.
We're lucky his collarbone didn't break."
Matthew chirped a question, but frowned as he realized that didn't fix this
situation. He tried again, "Help? How?"
"Well, you can start by letting go and backing away for a moment. I need to do
a secondary check to make sure that part of his ribs did not chip away from the
impact and you are too close to him for the check to be completely accurate."
Matthew blinked, trying to understand that this person (healer,he reminded
himself, healer who will help) wanted him to stop touching Alistair. He told
himself to back away, to let him go, but the best he could do was sit up,
Alistair's hand still in his. He couldn'tlet him go, not when he was hurt like
this, but he did scooch away a little. He looked at Alistair, his mouth set
into lines of amusement, before looking pleadingly at Madam Longbottom. Is this
far enough, he asked with a glance, already feeling a little less steady from
the lack of contact. This was going to be a problem, but there would be time
for panicking over what would be later. He was too busy worrying over what was
happening now.
Longbottom sighed and said gently, "That's fine, Matthew." She approached the
bed again and waved her wand over Alistair's shoulder. She hummed to herself
then gestured pointedly at the bruise. Alistair gasped sharply in surprise and
Matthew was instantly tense, alert, and back to being plastered to his side,
almost without thought. He chirped at her in short bursts, accusatory.
She just smiled at him. "His ribs are fixed. I'm going to get a salve for the
bruising and a sling for the arm."
Matthew's brow furrowed as he thought frantically. He looked at the bruises on
his mate's body, remembered something the healer had said not a week earlier,
about healing capabilities, and asked, "Bite. Him?"
Longbottom seemed to startle at the suggestion. "You mean to bite him over his
bruise? To heal him?" When Matthew only stared at her, she sighed and rubbed at
her temples. "You three…fine. Alistair, would you prefer that Matthew tried
biting the area to heal you or do you want the salve and sling?"
Matthew looked at his mate and found him smiling wryly. "Madam Longbottom, yer
askin' me ta choose between havin' me shoulder healed almost instantly with a
love bite an' wearin' a sling fer God knows how long? I'll take tha bite,
thanks."
"Why am I not surprised?" She'd mumbled to herself, probably not meaning for
Matthew to hear, before saying, "Fine. Please bite him for only a few seconds
at a time. I want to check his healing rate with each venom infusion."
"Erm, yer gonna stay?" Alistair asked, blush spreading over his cheeks.
Matthew, once more edging back into his senses, was not thrilled at the idea of
having a non-Gilbert audience for this.
Longbottom glared at both of them. "Yes, I am going to stay. You are suggesting
that I authorize an experimental treatment on an injured student by using the
genetic material of a different student, who is also a minor, without at least
monitoring the process. Not only no, but absolutely not. If the biting works
this time with no ill effect then I will not stay again. I personally have no
desire to witness what is about to happen, but as a professional healer, I will
work past my discomfort to make sure my students are healthy and not engaging
in dangerous activities. Do I make myself clear?"
"Aye, Madam." Alistair said with a wince. Matthew only nodded and leaned over
Alistair's chest. He pressed the gentlest of kisses to the bruise before
pulling his lips back, opening his jaw wide, and biting down. He was very
careful that only the tips of his fangs broke the skin and, hyper-aware of
their audience, refrained from licking at the small amount of blood that welled
from the marks. He mentally counted to five, trying to ignore how he could hear
Alistair's breath catch in his throat and feel his hand in his hair. This was
about healing him; everything else could come later.
He pulled away from Alistair carefully when he hit five, leaning back to allow
Madam Longbottom to inspect the injury. He shifted his gaze to his mate's face,
unsurprised to see his eyes dark with lust but a little distant, color
appearing high on his cheeks. He gripped Alistair's hand and found himself able
to ask him, "What do you see?"
Alistair blinked and focused on him. He squeezed Matthew's hand lightly and
said, voice intimate. "You, Matthew. Always you."
Madam Longbottom's voice broke the moment. "Alistair, can you try raising your
arm for me? The bruising has eased but I don't know how the venom has effected
your deep tissue."
Alistair managed to lift his arm a little, more than he could have done before
the bite, but he almost immediately put it down, face draining of color. "Tha's
about it."
The healer nodded. "That makes sense. Would you both be okay if Matthew bit
down longer and allowed his fangs to go deeper? I appreciate the control you
are showing, Matthew, but now I think you need to bite down harder to allow
your venom to get where it needs to go. We're probably going to have to do this
at least twice more, over both the bruise itself and into his shoulder."
Alistair said, "Sure."
Matthew had his reservations, however. He felt more himself, so much more in
control than when he had run into the room. He had never been more grateful to
form a complete sentence in his life than when he said, "If I bite him too
deeply, that may leave a mark that would last much longer than…than last week's
markings. It may even scar." He looked at the area again. Where he had bitten
down so carefully, there were four small silvery dots on Alistair's skin. The
area immediately around the dots were no longer a dark red, but a sickly
yellow.
Madam Longbottom took in the information and nodded. "Then we can do multiple,
short term shallow bites. If that doesn't work, then I will go get the salve
and sling as planned."
"I would be fine if Mattie marked me." Alistair said simply, like it was the
most obvious thing in the world.
Madam Longbottom looked extremelyuncomfortable at his admission, but said
nothing. A (concerningly large) part of Matthew was all for it. Another part
was horrified. "It's not that I'm not thrilled you're committed to this
relationship. But, hon, we've only been dating for a week. Maybe we should hold
off on permanent body markings until at least the six month mark?"
Alistair looked at him steadily and said, "I think we both know we'll be datin'
longer than six months, Mattie."
Matthew froze, entire body tensing at the insinuation, so not ready for this
conversation. "What?"
Alistair said nothing for a few seconds, visually dissecting Matthew's reaction
in a way that had him averting his eyes, before shrugging. He said with an all-
too-natural casual air, "Nothin'. Whatever makes ye comfortable. It's all fine
ta me. I just want ta be able ta use me arm."
That sentence was playing right into his instincts and Matthew had a feeling
that Alistair had done it deliberately. He gave in to the part of him that was
all but screamingto take up the offer and said, "I-I'll bite a little deeper
this time." He looked at the healer and asked, suddenly grateful for her
presence, "If I bite him longer than 30 seconds, could you get my attention?
Touching me is probably a bad idea but could you say my name?"
There was a weight to her gaze when Madam Longbottom said, "Of course."
Matthew looked at his mate's calm face and asked, "Ready?"
He smirked. "Yer askin' me tha'? Go ahead."
Matthew nodded, took a deep breath, and bit him again.
===============================================================================
Alistair could hardly catch his breath now as Madam Longbottom checked his
wound after the fifth, and hopefully final, bite. He had given up on
controlling the sounds he made around the half-way point of bite three, but he
drew the line at orgasming in front of his healer. Thing was, if Matthew bit
him one more time like that, he wouldn't care anymore. The hallucination was
still playing out in the back of his head, more vivid than any he had seen
before. He was shaking with the need to touch Matthew, to relieve some of his
tension, but there was the problem of his injury. The bruise on his chest was
gone, the question now was if shoulder was good to go.
Matthew looked like he hoped that was the last of it, too. He had started
losing control of himself around the same time Alistair stopped holding back
the sounds of his pleasure. To administer the last two bites to his shoulder,
he had actually straddled Alistair's torso and gripped his hair as he bit down.
Longbottom had to call him off both times. Now he was almost ignoring her as he
stared at Alistair, eyes heavy lidded and face flushed.
Alistair rotated his right arm one last time before Madam Longbottom declared
him healed and fled from the room, saying, "Be safe. Remember, there are
supplies in the drawer."
The door wasn't even closed before they were on each other, kissing as they
scrambled to get Matthew out of his clothes, the taste of it strewn with
copper. As they had to separate to fumble at their pants, Matthew asked,
"You're really healed?"
Alistair honestly couldn't remember getting out of his Quidditch breeches
faster in his life. "Aye, Mattie. Ye healed me. Why do ye ask?"
Alistair pulled him back into his arms, not waiting for him to answer as he
started kissing down his neck, hands roaming freely. "It's just-ah!-something
still feels off."
At the words, Alistair had to force himself to freeze. He ceased his
ministrations to ask if Matthew wanted to stop only for Matthew to claw lightly
at his shoulders and all but shout at him, "Don't stop!"
"Yer sure?" He asked anyway, kissing Matthew's jaw lightly.
"Yes." Came the hissed response and Alistair couldn't help laughing darkly into
his skin. He flipped them over so he was on top of Matthew and the Veela said,
"What's so funny?"
"You." Alistair answered easily, looking away from his boyfriend to reach for
the supply drawer, searching for the lube. "Ye know, I really hope tha
hallucinations I see when ye bite me are actually tha future."
Matthew ran his fangs down the side of Alistair's neck in response, sending a
wave of pleasure through him. "Why?"
"Because I want ta know if ye really will get off tha' much on what we would do
ta ye. I want ta know if ye would like tha way Gilbert held yer neck or tha way
I would tie ye down." Matthew's breath hitched. Alistair slicked up a hand and
reached down to hold them against each other as they moved. They both groaned
and Alistair continued, "Tha' last vision had audio, leannan. I want ta know if
ye sound like tha' when we take turns feckin' ye. If ye'll really beg fer it
like tha'. If ye will be as ours as I want ye ta be."
"Yes," Matthew moaned neck arching as he threw his head back. Alistair gripped
his hair and forced those brilliant, otherworldly eyes back to him.
"Yes ta wha', Mattie?"
"I'm yours."
Alistair believed him.
After they had finished, cleaned up, and put on clothes, Alistair kissed his
temple and said, "Thank you fer tha healin', Mattie."
"Of course, anytime. But…" Matthew's eyes remained glowing, his fangs visible.
"Something's wrong."
Alistair pulled him into his arms, needing to touch him with the venom so
thoroughly in his system, and he asked, "Wha' does it feel like? Can ye
describe it ta me?"
"It's kinda like little ants of pure energy are crawling under my skin. It's
gotten worse in the past five minutes, but not as bad as before when you…oh, my
God." Matthew tensed, going pale.
"Wha'? Wha' is it?"
"Gilbert. Gilbert's hurt."
Oh, shit.
===============================================================================
"Fuck." Gilbert groused under his breath, no longer able to ignore the pain in
his wrist after that last sharp turn. He had stopped holding his bat in his
right hand fifteen minutes ago when the shaking had gotten too bad. But trying
to steer his broom with one barely-functioning hand wasn't going to work for
much longer.
He had done his job, at least.
Alfred had mostly focused on the game after Alistair had left an hour and some
change ago. Gilbert, however, hadn't forgotten or forgiven him and it had
showed in the way he had played.
He'd been only absently paying attention to the broadcasted commentary as led
by Feliks, but he had noted a distinct tone of…awe perhaps when Gilbert started
systematically targeting Gryffindor players. The first time he made a move
after Alistair left, he'd aimed for Berwald, the team captain, and managed to
clip him on the shoulder. From there, it was a toss-up who he would
specifically pinpoint. His decisions seemed arbitrary in the moment, but a
current of unease had spread quickly through the Gryffindor team as they
realized he was on the warpath, a one man army.
They had never seen him play without Alistair by his side. His boyfriend was
the colder of the two at first sight, but he kept Gilbert grounded and
moderated. Without him there to remind him of the careful boundaries they set
on their own actions… with him injuredfrom protecting him…
Gilbert showed them what he was capable of without a leash and Feliks hadn't
sound impressed by the time he had all but shattered the team psyche of his
rivals, but afraid.
With the Slytherin score comically ahead of Gryffindor's, his captain finally
toke the time to look him over and approach him. "Can you even use your right
hand anymore?"
"Not really." Gilbert said, doing his best to ignore the pain but failing.
"That's what I thought. Get on the ground and join your boyfriend in the
clinic. You're done for this game." He nodded, not caring enough to argue
considering how much his wrist was killing him. His adrenaline was fading and
he did notwant to be in the air when it crashed. He angled his broom down when
she called, "And Beilschmidt? Good work."
Natalia didn't hand out compliments easily or often, so Gilbert bowed from his
neck and said, "Believe me, captain, it was my pleasure."
She shook her head at him, smiling a little, before rejoining the game once
more.
Gilbert spotted Alfred staring at him and he sent him a smile that felt evil
and very clearly telegraphed, see you on the ground, you prick. He quickly flew
down to the medical center, wanting to get the pain stopped as soon as
possible, relieved to be able just tuck his bat under an arm and hold his
injured wrist against his body rather than use it.
He landed easily enough and went straight to the medic on duty. Regina knew him
well by this point and shook her head at him, black curls bouncing with the
movement. "Sit," she said in a no-nonsense tone, her dark chocolate eyes
focusing on his injury.
He obeyed easily, saying good naturedly, "How are you, Ms. Reggie?"
She removed the wrist guard gently, revealing a red and way too swollen wrist.
Tutting at him, she began lightly touching the injured area. "Be better if an
injured student wasn't sitting in front of me." He hissed as she touched a
sensitive spot and she scowled at him, brown skin furrowing in outraged
realization. "How long have you been playing with this strain? When did it
start hurting?"
He averted his eyes, but answered, "About an hour and a half ago."
She closed her eyes tight, pursed her lips, and tilted her chin to the side for
a moment, like she always did when one of the players had done something
extremelystupid and/or dangerous. Then she opened her eyes and said, "You've
got at least a grade 2 wrist strain here. I'm not going to do too much to it
before Longbottom has a chance to check it, but I will at least put this in a
brace. I don't care how stupid you look while doing it; keep your wrist above
your heart as you walk to the hospital. Do you need an escort?" She asked,
already searching through her supplies for a brace. She found one quickly and
began easing him into it.
"No, I'll be fine. I-" Gilbert cut himself off, staring at the approaching blue
light as it traveled suddenly into the tent. He recognized the white-tailed
eagle as belonging to Alistair, the patronus' wings big enough to take up most
of the tent's width when fully extended. The phantom beak opened and out came
his boyfriend's voice.
"Where tha feckare ye? I know yer hurt. Get ta tha hospital. Now, Gilbert." The
bird disappeared, leaving a stunned medical staff and a worried Gilbert.
Regina asked the question he was wondering, "How did he know you were hurt?"
She finished strapping on the brace as he responded, "I don't…" Matthew.
Matthew was with him. "Oh. Oh, God. Can I go?"
She startled. "Yes, but—"
"Thanks!" He called, running out of the tent towards the castle. He didn't
bother keeping his wrist elevated, too focused on not tripping and falling on
his already injured arm as he fucking sprintedto the hospital. Fuck, if Matthew
knew that he was hurt, did that mean he knew that Alistair had been hurt
earlier? Would he know and probably lose it every time they were hurt?
Considering that Alistair was slated to become an auror and Gilbert was angling
for a hit wizard that would be a huge fucking problem. Not to mention the fact
they had a whole year of Quidditch left. Jesus Christ, but they were screwed if
that was the case.
One problem at a time, he thought, throwing himself through the hospital wing
doors, startling the nurse on staff, Maria. She looked at him, seemed to shake
her head, and said, "Your two young men and Madam Longbottom are in the back
room, dear."
"Thank you," He said before jogging to the end of the hall, out of breath. He
knocked before opening the door, the first thing his eyes finding in the room
were Matthew's slit pupils. "Are you okay?"
Matthew let out a strange chirping sound as his eyes settled on Gilbert's
braced wrist, and reached for him. Gilbert was at his side with barely a
thought, taking his hand and sitting beside where Alistair had Matthew in his
lap almost…restraining him. Alistair was the one who answered him, relaxing a
little as he said, "I think we should be askin' ye tha'. Yer wrist got worse?"
Gilbert nodded then frowned at him, noting how he didn't seem to be holding his
right side any differently and how he wasn't wearing a sling after a dislocated
shoulder. "What happened to your shoulder?"
Madam Longbottom sighed and rubbed her temples. "Gilbert, now that you've
joined us, could you please explain what happened while I examine your wrist."
Gilbert stretched out his right arm, hissing as Longbottom began removing the
brace, "My batting arm was a bit more active today than usual. It started
hurting even before Alistair was hurt. Ms. Regina said that it was at least a
grade two strain, though I don't really know what that means."
The healer looked at him for a second like she was internally screaming, only
for her face to smooth out into calm lines once more. She rolled his sleeve up
to get a better look at the clearly injured area and Matthew was suddenly
plastered to his uninjured side, wedged in tightly between Alistair and Gilbert
so he could touch them both. He was making inhuman, distressed sounds and
Gilbert turned his head to kiss his forehead, questioning eyes meeting
Alistair's. Was he like this when you came in?
Alistair inclined his head a minutely, brow creasing in a way that telegraphed,
Worse.
Longbottom said, "Can you tell me whyit took you so long to seek medical
attention?"
She waved her wand over the area, muttering to herself as he said, "It didn't
feel as bad at first after Alistair was hurt. I had to get him back for what he
did."
Matthew stilled suddenly at the sentence as Alistair shook his head at him and
said, amused, "Am I avenged, Gilly?"
"Oh, yes. I didn't hurt them for what he did to you and Mattie and tried to do
to me; I broke them."
Alistair was completely aware of what Gilbert was capable of and, rather than
looking at him horrified, he grinned at him and said, "Have I told ye I adore
ye?"
"I could stand to hear it more."
Matthew broke the light mood with one cold word. Gone was the avian chirps of
concern and distress. No, Matthew's voice reminded him of reptilian rage: of
scales scraping on stone, of the hiss of an annoyed komodo dragon, of a
rattlesnake's warning before it strikes. "He?"
Everyone in the room froze, turning slowly as one to look at Matthew. There was
nothing gentle in the Hufflepuff's expression as he stared at first Gilbert
then turned his head to look at Alistair. Madam Longbottom cleared her throat
and said, "Excuse me?"
"Someone hurt them. There were no accidents." Matthew's s-sounds were
stretching out. He was still staring at Alistair as he bit out deliberately,
"Who. Hurt. You."
Fuck.
Gilbert knew that he had been planning on leaving Alfred to Matthew wrath, but
that suddenly sounded like setting him up for death. They had never seen
Matthew rage, not really. He was reminded that Veela rages were not known for
their orderliness, but their pure destructive power. He wasn't sure what would
be left if that violent impulse was turned on someone other than himself. His
younger boyfriend was gentle, but what stared out of his eyes was anything but
forgiving.
How would he feel when he knew his brother was the cause of this?
Alistair hadn't dared look away from the demand in Matthew's face, actually
went as far as cupping his cheeks. "If I tell ye," he started, "will ye promise
ta stay here with us? Gilly's hurt, Mattie, and ye can maybe heal him. Will you
not go after who hurt me?"
Matthew blinked at him before saying, voice pulled back from that disturbing
edge, "I will stay, my m- Alistair. I will do what I can for you both, for you
come first. But I cannot promise not to go after him later, especially if his
attack was deliberate. The way Gilbert described it, it sounded personal."
Alistair sighed, before leaning down to kiss Matthew chastely. Madam Longbottom
said then, "Gilbert, you managed notto break your wrist, but it was a close
thing. I'm frankly surprised you were able to use it for so long because this
will probably end up being a grade three strain. Matthew's venom healed
Alistair. Would you be willing to receive the same treatment?"
"Wait, really? That'swhy he's not wearing a sling? Mattie bit him?"
Clearly conflicted over answering, she said, "Yes."
He looked at his boyfriends again, seeing a fresh line of silver down
Alistair's neck and a prominent love bite on Matthew's. He knew that Alistair's
mark was new, but had assumed Matthew's was from the night before. Alistair saw
him looking and pulled his shirt collar to the side so Gilbert could see the
new marks on his shoulder as well, deliberate puncture wounds rather than
scrapes. Remembering all the side effects that came with Matthew's venom,
Gilbert said, "I'll take that option then."
Madam Longbottom closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose, saying
wearily, "Okay. I'll be on duty until about an hour after the game finishes.
Matthew, unless he gives you the same permission as Alistair, start slow. In
any case, no more than 30 seconds at a time. Keep it up until there's no
lingering soreness or swelling and a full range of motion is restored. I know
there will be limitations on how far you can be apart for a while after, but
please at least alert me when he's healed? I would like to double check before
I clear him. Also, order food for Matthew as soon as possible. With him so
focused on the both of you, I doubt his body is giving off the usual signs of
being hungry." Without waiting on a response, she left them to their own
devices.
"What permission?" Gilbert asked, surprised at her easy acceptance and quick
departure. Although, she wasaware of the most instant effect of Matthew's
venom…he was grateful to be alone with his boyfriends then.
"Tha longer an' deeper Mattie bites us, tha longer tha mark will remain. It
could even be permanent." Alistair solemnly.
Gilbert stared at him. "You gave permission for that? For a permanent mark?"
What he really meant was, You would have allowed that sign of possession?
You'rethatsure about us being permanent?
Alistair held his gaze steadily, "Aye, I did." He lifted a brow as if to say,
Aren't you?
"Wait a second," Matthew said, getting them to break their silent conversation.
He sounded more himself now that the conversation shifted to healing and not
hurting, though maybe that side was Matthew, too. Maybe his penchant for
violence when it came to protecting who he cared about was just as much a part
of him as Alistair's cunning intellect and Gilbert's ruthlessness (when
pushed). Maybe his reaction when Antonio had driven Lovino to tears was more
characteristic that he thought. "I wouldn't bite him that deeply, not on his
wrist. Christ, I would probably run into bone before I bit deep enough for a
mark to be permanent which I would really prefer not to do, by the way. Bite
his bone, I mean."
"But you would be okay with marking me permanently?" Gilbert asked quietly,
curious of the answer and all it would mean for them, of what it might possibly
confirm.
"That's…the answer to that is complicated." Matthew blushed, licking at his
lips as if he couldn't meet Gilbert's eyes. "The core of it is it's too soon in
our relationship for that kind of…display to be healthy."
That was fair enough but…"Did you mark Scottie?"
Matthew flinched. "I-I don't know. I didn't bite down as hard as I could, as
deep as I could, but I'd lost control by that last bite. If Madam Longbottom
hadn't stopped me…"
Gilbert glanced to Alistair, seeking more information. His boyfriend said, in a
gentle tone meant for Matthew, "I know it was hard by tha end, Mattie. If it is
permanent, then I don't mind. You knew tha' before tha second bite. I can use
me arm an' I'm not in pain. A few silver marks on me shoulder is a more than
fair exchange."
Matthew winced, "We're talking and you're suffering. Let me bite you the first
time, to at least ease your pain."
"Okay…" Gilbert said, moving is arm slowly until it was in front of Matthew.
The Veela leaned forward and, when Gilbert felt his lips he continued, "…But if
his marks turn out to be permanent, I want one, too. We're equals in this,
Matthew. I want our bodies to reflect that."
Matthew looked at his face then, pupils expanding in that way that was
fascinating to watch. Without shifting his gaze, Matthew pulled back his lips,
opened his mouth, and bit him.
Gilbert knew Matthew was being careful by the way the fangs slid in only a
little deeper than they had the first bite, his breath hot and wet on too
sensitive skin. Almost immediately, a wave of numbness overwhelmed the
throbbing mess that had become his wrist. Soon after, however, pleasure snaked
its way through him, slithering up his arm and down his spine. He knew enough
not to move while Matthew bit him, but it was a struggle as his breath caught
and his eyes fluttered shut. Then Gilbert felt someone before him and opened
his eyes to find Alistair right in front of him, one hand holding Matthew's
like he couldn't let go while the other tilted Gilbert's face up. His older
boyfriend kissed him then, giving him an outlet for the energy rushing through
him, filling him. He moaned into his mouth, clutched as his shirt with his free
hand, even as images played in his mind of a different time and place.
Maybe it had something to do with Matthew's reaction to finding out he and
Alistair had been hurt deliberately, but this vision was the first for him. He
had never (yet) seen that look of measured cruelty on Matthew's face, seen the
grace in the casual power of his movements as he—
Matthew removed his fangs from his arm, bringing Gilbert back to the moment
rather than the still-playing movie (fantasy?) in his head. He was still
kissing Alistair as he fell almost completely back to the present. He pulled
away gently as he panted, "Holy shit."
Matthew said, "Does your wrist feel better?" at the same time Alistair said
against his lips, "Wha' do ye see?"
"Did you know? That Mattie's a—" Gilbert asked, blinking at Alistair before
turning his head to stare at Matthew, amazed and trying to match the adult
images in his head with the concerned boy in front of him.
"I'm a what?" He asked tentatively, like he was afraid of the answer.
"A switch. In every senseof the word, you're a switch. All the other visions
had us topping you but this…" Gilbert whistled lowly, allowing his eyes to go
unfocused for a minute.
"Ye have audio?" Alistair asked and Gilbert looked back at him, raising his
eyebrows.
"No. You did?"
"Tha' last time, I did." Oh, man. The visuals were consuming enough but to know
what they were saying, what that soundedlike…
"How many times did he bite you?"
"Five."
"Your wrist, Gilbert?" Matthew said insistently, trying to bring them back to
the point of this exercise. He was injured. Right.
He could move it a bit more now, the area nearly completely numbed by the
venom. The swelling had gone down a bit but he couldn't flex his fingers
without a surge in pain. "Better but still not good. It might take a bit,
especially if I tore something important."
He'd said that last with a bit too much eagerness but Matthew didn't call him
on it. He just asked, "Ready?"
Gilbert nodded and Matthew bit down again. At his gasp, Alistair turned his
head back to him and came to stand between his spread knees. "Now, Gilly." He
nipped along Gilbert's jaw and he couldn't help but moan at the combined
sensation of having two sets of teeth on his skin. "Tell us exactlywha' yer
seein'."
Gilbert did.
===============================================================================
By the time it was all said and done, after Madam Longbottom declared Gilbert
healed, they ate in the small room Matthew was beginning to think of as theirs.
He had been famished and ready to bolt to the kitchens now that his eyes had
stopped glowing, but Longbottom wanted them to stay in the hospital until
Gilbert and Alistair could go at least ten minutes without touching him. She'd
explained that they had no clue just how much venom was running through their
systems and, if they had to stay overnight to keep the Slytherin boys from
going mad, then it was best they just stay put.
Now that he wasn't consumed by various hungers, he remembered something that
had his eyes glowing again. He said, slowly, "You never told me who hurt you."
Gilbert and Alistair exchanged a weighted glance and their effortless
communication was beginning to piss him off. "No, don't look at each other,
look at me. Who. Hurt. You?"
Gilbert winced and said, "Well, technically he didn't hurt me…he just tried. A
lot. Though he calmed down after Alistair was hit." Alistair gave him a sharp
look of reproach but the words had hit home.
Rage. Rage and violence and the need for revenge filled him as his fangs
descended once more. He didn't even care how long it had taken him to be free
of them today. No, he didn't care about much of anything besides making this
person understand that hurting or targeting Gilbert and Alistair was not
allowed. Still, he did not move from his seat, did not brush the hands, now
moving in soothing gestures, off of him, because his mates needed to touch him,
so he would let them touch him. Surely, later, once the venom had worked its
way through their bodies, they would let him do what he wanted, right?
He reminded himself it was not the right time for any retribution while his
mates were for all intents and purposes medically attached to him. That thought
had him retracting his fangs, though his eyes stayed changed. That was fine
with him, considering the fact he had left his room without his glasses and had
been existing with less than perfect vision. There was plenty of rage to keep
the glow going and they still hadn't given him the name.
He smiled at them, trying his best to take any lethal edge out of it to
reassure his boyfriends. "I'm okay, guys. See, look! My fangs are gone and
everything. You can tell me. I promise not to hunt them down until after we're
released from the hospital."
They didn't look very reassured.
They exchanged anotherlook as Alistair sighed but focused on Matthew as he
said, "Alfred. It was Alfred."
He stopped. Everything just…stopped. Because what Alistair said couldn't be
true. His twin brother, the one person who may have more than a passing inkling
of what exactly Gilbert and Alistair were to him, who had grown up on the same
stories as him, who had seen their mother fucking lose it whenever their father
was threatened…he could not have gone after Matthew's mates in the one place he
could not reach them. It wasn't possible.
But it was.
Matthew was shaking.
He must have been for a while, because Gilbert and Alistair were all but
plastered to his sides, voices consoling and hands calming. He couldn't quite
make out what they were saying, couldn't hear past the numb silence in his
head.
But he did hear the knock at the door.
And everything began again.
Gilbert called out, "Not now!" The soundproofing in the room kept whomever from
hearing him and the door opened a crack.
It was Lovino's voice that answered, "I hope you bastards are decent because
you're about to have company."
Alistair called back, voice urgent in a way that said something was wrong, "Get
in and shut tha door. We have a problem."
Lovino started opening the door, saying, "You don't tell me what—" He caught
sight of Matthew with two Slytherin boys frantically wrapped around him, and
did what Alistair said. The door shut swiftly as he asked, serious, "What
happened?"
"What happened," Matthew started, his voice nearly unrecognizable by the
violence contained in his words, tone not quite human, not even mammalian. His
fangs were back and he didn't remember them appearing. "What happened is my
twin attacking my boyfriends because of what they are to me. What happened is
the one person who might truly understand what this means and feels like went
against all our traditions and our own fucking bond as brothers to go after my-
" Matthew cut himself off then, running out of words that didn't go into what
being someone's mate meant to convey how deep this betrayal ran.
Gilbert kissed his forehead as Alistair asked Lovino, "Wha' did ye mean,
'company?'"
Lovino shot them a deadpan look. "I guess I was right in thinking you both
forgot that your team captain and friends visit you when you're hurt after a
game? And guess what ended 10 minutes ago. I left the moment your brother
caught the snitch. You won, by the way."
Matthew still reeling from Alistair's news, didn't grasp the implication.
Gilbert and Alistair did though, both cursing. It was Gilbert who said, "We
can't leave Matthew."
Lovino nodded. "I can see that. You two are probably the only thing keeping him
from tearing this castle apart brick by brick to get to his brother."
"No," Alistair corrected. "It's not just tha'. Mattie healed us an' now we have
trouble goin' without touchin' him."
"With his venom." Lovino said out loud, getting nods of confirmation from
Gilbert and Alistair that Matthew could feel against him. "Oh, you do like to
make things interesting, maple bastard." He huffed a breath upwards, making his
bangs move with the air. It was a gesture that he only used when completely out
of his depth. The fact that Matthew noted that was an improvement. He felt a
little calmer, not like he was okay or that this was okay, but less likely to
murder his brother on sight. His mother would be devastated but might
understand why. His father would be crushed and definitelywouldn't understand.
That didn't mean he couldn't hurt him.
With those thoughts in mind, he blinked repeatedly, trying to clear his head.
Meanwhile, his best friend and his boyfriends were still in crisis mode. "What
do we do?" Gilbert asked as if he were ready to take on the world while still
attached to the homicidal Hufflepuff.
"You stay here and make sure he doesn't destroy the place." Lovino said,
pointing at them.
"Hey, I feel better!" He all but feltthe incredulity of their stares. "I've
decided not to kill him!" he declared proudly, because it was a marked
improvement than what he had been considering a moment before.
"…Right. So as I was saying, you two fucking stay here. Do not let him go. I'll
run interference and ask Longbottom to help. She'll probably agree once I
explain the situation, though I think you three may collectively make her go
grey. Maybe she'll say you're under quarantine for whatever-the-fuck reason."
"Thanks, Lovi," Matthew said, sounding and feeling much more himself. "But
Gilbert and Alistair can let me go if they want to. I was serious about not
killing Alfred; dad wouldn't understand."
Lovino looked at him in horror. "And your mom would?"
Matthew tried to shrug, but Gilbert and Alistair were still holding him tight.
"She would never recover from the loss, but she would see it as an unfortunate
product of Alfred's own stupidity. Veela have killed blood over less and, by
our culture, it would be completely justified."
There was a moment of stunned silence before Lovino just shook his head and
headed for the door. "As disturbing as that is, I have things to do." He opened
the door and, seeing someone, said, "Oh, fuck no. Nobody comes in here,
especiallynot you." He then shouted, "Madam Longbottom!"
The door was shut swiftly behind him, but Matthew could still mostly hear what
was happening on the other side since it was justoutside the door, almost as if
Lovino was barricading the thing himself. A female voice that sounded vaguely
familiar commanded, "What do you mean, no one? I'm here to make sure my players
are still functional." Ah, Natalia then.
Lovino fearlessly retorted, "Just saw them. They're fine, not even in slings.
Madam Longbottom did a fantastic job. It's their boyfriendwho is sick now and,
trust me when I say you do notwant to go in there.
"No!" he shouted suddenly, fury lacing his voice. "Not only do you not go in
there but you don't fucking speak. Not one goddamn word. Oh, Madam Longbottom,
thank God. We have a situation." That last word was laden with relief and
meaning that was difficult to miss.
"Okay, everyone out." Madam Longbottom said. There was a chorus of incoherent
protests that made her continue. "As lovely as it is to see team solidarity, I
have indeed cleared Alistair and Gilbert as healthy. Matthew is quite sick,
however, and they wished to remain in quarantine with him until he is better.
Please, everyone, head to your dormitories. Thank you."
There was a shuffling of feet and murmurs heading away from the door when
Lovino said lowly, "That means you, too, you fucking prick. Get the hell out of
my sight."
"You don't get to bar me from that room," came an achingly, enragingly familiar
voice and Matthew felt any ounce of control he had gained from Alistair and
Gilbert's continued touch fade. "He's my brother and—"
"And you're the reason he's about to fucking lose it, you goddamn idiot."
Lovino hissed back. "Have you anyidea what you put him through? Do you even
fucking care?"
"Let me go." Matthew said quietly. Gilbert and Alistair continued to hold him,
pressing kisses now against whatever bare skin they could reach.
"No, Matthew." Gilbert said gently.
"We need ye, remember?" Alistair supplied. "We need ta keep touching ye."
"You need me." Matthew repeated out loud, the idea simple enough to break
through to him. "You need to touch me."
"Yes, Liebling, we can't let you go."
"Of course I—" Alfred started.
"That was a fucking rhetorical question because the obvious answer is abso-
fucking-lutely not. As far as I can tell, they only just got around to telling
him that his own twin betrayed him by going after two people he would probably
die for and would certainly kill for, even knowingwhat they are to him. You
disgust me." Lovino said and Matthew had never heard his best friend so angry
that he stopped cursing, never heard his voice drop to that low register of
barely contained fury. His fire fueled Matthew's, even with Gilbert and
Alistair wormed their hands under his shirt in hopes that skin-to-skin contact
would be more effective in calming him. It was, but only marginally so when
their safety was the ultimate cause of this rage. And the cause of that threat
was right outside the door. But…
They needed to touch him.
"By what right do you talk to me like that? Like you know what he's going
through better than I do?"
"Because he called me that first time, not you. Because I watched what a rage
did to him even as it broke something in me, because he trusted me to stay with
him. Because you have betrayed his trust in the worst way and he is my family
and you don't deserve him. You never did. Because I am willing to do what is
necessary to protect him when you would disregard his happiness for whatever
reasons of your own. So you need to leave, right now, unless you want me to
remind you why your brother is not the only dangerous person who wears yellow
and black."
Alfred was quiet for a moment and Matthew had calmed a little, Lovino's words
and his mates' hands reaching through to him. There was a scuffle and a bang
against the door. Then Alfred said, tone low and threatening, "Move."
"No. Leave." Lovino bit out.
"Or what?" Alfred sneered at him.
"Or I tell the person you care the most for, the person we both think is oh-so-
special to you, all the awful shit you've ever done. I would tell him through
intermediaries and in stages, systematically turning him against you so he
wouldn't be there when you need him the most. Leave or I destroy your chance at
happiness, just because I can."
"You-you don't know anything." Alfred said, unsure.
"Oh, but I do. After all," Lovino paused and Matthew could almost see the smile
on his face. "Everyone trusts a 'loyal' Hufflepuff with their secrets."
"…Fine. But I will see Matthew eventually."
"And next time Gilbert and Alistair might not stop him from ripping you a new
one. Oh and Alfred? Put the word out that those three are under myprotection.
Anyone who comes at them is subject to my personal retribution."
There was a long moment of quiet, a sigh, and finally, a knock at the door.
Lovino came in and leaned against the closed door. He winced at the sight of
them but said, "It's handled. How're you doing, Mattie?"
"Better. Much Better." Gilbert and Alistair almost slumped with relief against
him and Matthew realized that, while he had been so focused on what was
happening on the other side of the door, his mates had thought him liable to
lose himself at any moment. The slipped their hands from under his shirt and
took Matthew's hands. "And thank you. For what you said."
Lovino paled and he felt Gilbert shift as he asked, "You heard what was
happening through the door?"
Matthew frowned and looked up at him. "Didn't you?"
"Ah, no. What happened?"
Matthew looked back at his friend and smiled, uncaring that his fangs flashed
and his eyes glowed. "Lovino proved why he is the best brother I could have
ever asked for."
Lovino hesitated but smiled back, a moment of understanding passing between
them. "That's what family is for, maple bastard. And I never turn my back on
family."
===============================================================================
It wasn't until halfway through the next day that Gilbert was able to talk to
Alistair alone, confident enough in their privacy that he felt comfortable
bringing this up. They were out walking the grounds, taking a study break, when
Gilbert said, "We need to talk about what happened yesterday."
Alistair snorted derisively. "Which part, exactly? Tha one where ye managed ta
terrorize half tha school-which I love ye fer, by tha way- or the one where
Matthew knew we were hurt without bein' told? Or maybe tha fact he was willin'
ta kill his brother over us- which I kinda love him fer- or even tha' we're
apparently under tha protection of Vargas?"
"The second one. Everything else we can't really do anything about." Gilbert
sighed and ran a hand through his hair. His eyes scanning for anyone watching
or listening to them, he asked, "How did he look when he came in?"
"A right mess, Gilbert. He couldn't speak, he was so worked up. Just those
chirps you heard an' a word at a time if he really tried. Thank fucktha' Vargas
brought him or I have no doubt everyone would know what he is. He
didn't care bout a thing else 'till I was healed. He could only talkproperly
after touchin' me fer a bit."
"Shit. And he knew I was hurt?"
Alistair nodded, face solemn. "Aye. Maybe tha's why he was so bad when he came
in; he knew on some level we were both hurt. He was distracted with me for a
bit, but I think tha moment ye tore something important, he lost it again. I
don't know if I could have stopped him from goin' ta ye if he did not know I
needed ta touch him. He'd been tryin' ta convince me ta walk with him ta tha
pitch when I sent that message. He'd been shakin' with tha need ta go ta ye."
Alistair pursed his lips and rolled his eyes away from Gilbert.
It was worse than he'd thought. "Did he say what it felt like? To know we were
hurt and be away from us?"
Alistair grimaced. "Like ants under his skin. And tha' wasn't as bad as when
he'd been alone, either."
A thrill of unease went up Gilbert's spine at that imagery and he said, "We
can't keep doing this to him."
"Agreed, but wha' do ye mean?"
"I mean, think about it. What if we got hurt at the next game, got knocked
unconscious and Matthew was unable to heal that? Or what if we got hurt
somewhere far from him? What would he do if we were miles from him or in a
dangerous situation? What would he do to get to us, Alistair? Or worse, what if
we got killed doing something? What would we unleash on the world if we weren't
there to calm him?"
"Yer talkin' bout more than Quidditch, Gilly," Alistair said carefully, like he
understood where this was heading and the jury was out on whether he liked it.
"Yes." Gilbert licked his lips and said, "I-I'm reconsidering my career
options. If this…if weare as long term as I hope, then I won't drag our
soulmate into a warzone."
"An' ye don't think I should be an auror," Alistair said, tone neutral.
Gilbert shook his head. "I can't make that decision for you, Scottie. You would
make a brilliant auror, the best, and our world would be grateful to have you.
There's no one I would trust more to bring down a dark wizard once you were
trained."
"But Mattie…" Alistair trialed off, eyes going distant.
Gilbert nodded, "But I would be careful of going where he could not follow. I
think we both know he would walk any path to get to us, destroy anything in his
way, if it meant he could get to us when we were hurt."
Alistair clinched his jaw at the thought and said after a moment, "We should
talk ta him bout this. If we're goin' ta change our lives fer him, he should
know."
"…But you are thinking about it?"
Alistair let out a long breath smiled a little. "Yeah. I never really cared
bout bein' an auror, anyway. It was just somethin' I was told I would be good
at, great even. Now tha' I have a reason ta not do it…" Alistair's smile
widened. "I have ta figure out what I want. And I think I'll have fun with
tha'."
===============================================================================
Matthew finally received his mother's reply to his news on Tuesday and was not
looking forward to explaining the pertinent contents of the letter to Gilbert
and Alistair. But he neededto tell them and didn't want to wait. He was already
keeping so much from them, like the fact that he was their mate…and that he
loved them both. It was too soon, by human standards, for him to love Gilbert
and especially Alistair. But they cared for him and had such different dynamics
and he could watch them move for hours and God, but he would have killed his
brother to keep them safe but they knew it would have hurt him and kept him
still and they accepted himand…he was in love with them. To assuage some of his
guilt in allowing himself some pretty important secrets, he decided to tell
them at dinner that they should find a private place to talk.
At the table, there had been a strange tension between Gilbert and Alistair,
like something had happened. It didn't seem to divide them, but it did give
their aura a strange edge that concerned him. He shared a look with Lovino, who
had noticed something similar. His friend, on Matthew's silent assent, asked,
"Hey, what's bothering you two?"
Gilbert and Alistair glanced at each other before looking back at Lovino,
Alistair smiling crookedly. "Heard an interestin' rumor today, about our
Mattie. Maybe ye know who started it."
"Rumor, huh…" Lovino said, clearly shifting through his knowledge what the
current happenings around Hogwarts. "There are lots of rumors, all of which
ridiculous. Honestly, you bastards have been my biggest source of entertainment
in a while." Lovino smiled at Matthew and said, "Did you know you're apparently
dating Prussian would-be royalty?"
Gilbert choked on his drink.
While Matthew was making sure that Gilbert was okay, Alistair wasn't deterred.
"I'm talkin' bout one tha' could have gotten him in serious trouble. One that
had our Potion's Master hold us after class to ask if we had eaten anythin'
unusual."
"…that one."
"Aye, tha' one. Any clue who started it?"
"Started what?" Matthew asked. "What are you talking about?"
There was a moment of silence between the three of them, the tension enough to
draw Francis and Antonio's attention. "What's the matter?" Antonio asked,
confused.
"Liebling…" Gilbert started, hesitant for some reason and all this build-up was
making him scared. "It's just a rumor. Nakamura knows that it was false, so
you're in no danger of getting in trouble for it. We just didn't want to—we
thought what was said would upset you."
Matthew glanced between the three of them. "Really, guys? Seriously? You
shouldn't keep things from me just because you think I'll be upset or angry. If
you just don't want to, sure, but I don't want you guys to walk on eggshells
around me. It would be kinda messed up if you were actually afraid to tell me
things. I wouldn't even push but this seems important. What happened?"
Alistair took one of his hands and raised it to his lips. As he lowered it
again he said, "It's not important, Mattie. Gilly an' I are only upset people
would say somethin' like tha' bout ye. Tha' they would think yer tha' kinda
person. Wha' they said doesn't matter. We jus' don't like ta hear wha' is
said."
"What was it?" Matthew asked again, emphatic now.
Lovino snorted. "I know I said don't hurt him, guys, but beating around the
bush like this isn't fucking helping." He then looked at Matthew and said,
gently, "There was talk that there was no way a guy who no one knew in any
social circles had managed to snag these two…lovely people without a lot of
magical assistance."
Matthew gaped at him. "They thought I gave them amortentia? They thought I
poisoned them?" He was surprised but he wasn't angry. No, he understood. The
fact that they chose to date him wasa shock. Hell, Gilbert dating him rather
than just making out with him once was pretty much out of left field for the
school's social cesspools. Not to mention the rarity of a polyamorous
relationship in general or that, despite what Gilbert and Alistair had said,
Matthew was not even close to their level of hotness.
Well shit, now he was sad.
It took only seconds to process those thoughts, the mental pathway so fucking
familiar, and Matthew slumped dejectedly over his food. Gilbert and Alistair
tensed, hands immediately soothing but Lovino just nodded. "Yep. Goddamn
imbeciles. Like you needed that kind of help." He looked between his boyfriends
and the ghost of a mischievous expression crossed his face. "Besides, as Nate
and Vash can attest to, you never had to work hard to get at least one cute boy
into your bed." Lovino then did the oddest thing and winked at him.
Matthew's face screwed up at the mental picture that his best friend's words
drew. When he had named him brother, he had meant it. "Ew, Lovi—"
"What."
"Wait."
"Wha' was tha'?"
Matthew's eyes first found Antonio, because he was sitting across from him and
next to Lovino. His green eyes were on Lovino, body frozen with a cup halfway
to his mouth. He didn't seem to be breathing, his face completely blank. Quick
glances at Gilbert and Alistair showed them similarly situated. Lovino took it
all in and laughed in their faces. Then he said, "You doknow I've slept with
him more than you, right?"
Francis took in the conversation, expression rapt as he popped in a kernel of
popcorn from the dessert spread.
Gilbert pulled him against his body, arm around his waist and voice low in his
ear, "I thought I was your first kiss, Matthew."
"You were! Lovino's just joking for some unknown reason." Matthew said, glaring
at his friend because what the fuck, why are you doing this? "It was platonic!"
Four Slytherins stared at him before bursting into action. Francis started
laughing. Antonio sidled up to Lovino and started speaking slowly in some
pretty filthy Spanish while running a hand of Lovino's side. The irony of the
situation was it was Matthew and not Lovino that understood Spanish and
Antonio's words had him blushing. Gilbert all but drew him into his lap in the
Great Hall at dinner. Matthew quickly protested the impropriety of it all,
embarrassed and sure a professor would tell them to stop at any moment.
Gilbert's solution was to stop trying to move him but to touch his neck (which
he had not done in public in a long time) and Matthew had to close his eyes to
keep the change from being visible.
And Alistair? Alistair wasn't touching him more than the hand he had been
holding since Gilbert pulled Matthew to him. When Matthew felt in control of
himself to check his reaction, what he saw left him cold.
The hand that didn't hold Matthew's was gripping a fork in a fist. His face was
a blank, still mask. What scared Matthew was the cold fury in his eyes and oh
God, Matthew had to get them out of here, even if it meant missing dessert. He
hated missing dessert.
"Time to go." Matthew said, quickly. "Gilbert, Alistair, I need to talk to both
of you about some things. In private."
Gilbert was all for it, swiping a cookie as he stood. Alistair remained
immobile and this, this was the jealousy that Veela were infamous for causing.
The kind of possessiveness over a being not human that could drive a man mad or
to murder. He had to distract him.
Matthew took Alistair's face in his hands and turned his head until they were
eye to eye. He whispered to him, not even sure if could Gilbert hear what he
said, "Do you remember what I said on Saturday? When I was moaning under you?"
Alistair blinked and the mask cracked. He smirked a little. "Which time?"
"The first. I'm said, 'I'm yours.' Remember? You and Gilbert's. A little
affection between friends doesn't change that. He's a brother to me; anything
else would be super weird."
Alistair touched his wrist gently with the hand that had previously weaponized
the fork. "Okay, leannan."
Matthew released a sigh of relief and stood, wrapping a couple of maple cookies
in a napkin on the way. "Great. Now I actually dohave to talk to you guys. My
mom's letter came in."
That had both Gilbert and Alistair sobering and distracted Lovino from whatever
Antonio was doing. Antonio was not pleased but Matthew nodded that all was fine
to his friend, nothing urgent enough to stop what he had caused. When Lovino
focused on his boyfriend once more, Matthew only waited for a moment before
taking off at a quick pace for the door. He ignored as best as he could the
eyes he felt on him as Gilbert and Alistair followed him, catching up and
matching his stride easily as they both took one of his hands.
(While they weren't the only students leaving at the time, they were the most
conspicuous. McGonagall spotted them leaving and allowed herself the smallest
shake of her head, the tiniest smile on her lips.)
Once they had finally reached an exit, Matthew said, "We need to find privacy,
or at least some place I can but up a sound barrier." His tone was subdued,
dreading the conversation. If his mother didn't refer to them as his mates over
and over, then he would have handed over the letter itself for their inspection
and waited for their reactions. As it was, the letter was safely hidden in his
trunk and Matthew was going to have to paraphrase. A lot.
"Privacy," Gilbert said, a fierce undercurrent to his voice. It occurred to
Matthew then that he had only partially assuaged the jealousy Alistair was
feeling. Gilbert still needed reassurance. Matthew would happily give it to
him, but he needed to explain one very important thing to them both first.
About his venom.
"I have an idea," Alistair said, turning them to the opposite end of the
castle. They moved swiftly through the halls, quiet and occupied with their own
thoughts, when Alistair spoke again. "Is everythin' alright? Nothin's wrong, is
it?"
"You mean what my mother said?"
"Aye."
They had traveled far enough from the Great Hall that if they had been followed
they would have noticed it by now. They were alone and still moving to some yet
unspecified destination, so Matthew felt safe enough to say quietly, "She took
the news of us being together well enough. Surprised, but ultimately
accepting." She had needed a couple days to process the information before
sending him a reply, which is why it took so long for the letter to come in.
Well that, and the fact that his mother, who had centuries to hone her
emotional control, had lost her shit when she's gotten to the part where he'd
mentioned the rage, but that was another problem. Anyway, since Matthew's venom
worked on them, she chalked it up to fate having its own plan, even spoke of a
nearly-forgotten story of a Veela having multiple mates once before, though
they had all been women. "It was my dad who was having trouble understanding
us. It's not like he disapproves but…he worries."
"About what, Mattie?" Gilbert asked, hand lightly squeezing his.
"Well, he doesn't know either one of you. You're both older than me. Thank god
you're not seventh years or I think he would have more of a problem."
"Understandably," Alistair mumbled.
"And…dad remembers the War. He wasn't in Europe but your house has a pretty
widely-known reputation." Both Gilbert and Alistair stiffened and Matthew
hastened to say more. "He's willing to give you a chance, though! And he isn't
actually what I want to talk to you about. I found out a couple of things t-
that I shouldn't keep from you. That you should know."
Alistair brought them to an abrupt stop, Matthew running into him. He turned
quickly to steady him as Gilbert reached out to do the same, eyes scanning the
corridor behind them. Once he was satisfied, he pulled them around a corner
that led to a dead end, one lone door at the end of the hallway.
"Alistair, where—"
"Professor Leason's workroom. Since she's on sabbatical, this corridor is
almost never used. This is bout as private as ye can get without takin' pretty
drastic measures."
Gilbert pressed himself against Matthew's back, arms coming around to hug him
and head dipping to kiss his neck. The kiss wasn't insistent or leading. In
fact, Gilbert just seemed to rest against him, breathing in his scent. Against
his skin he said, "You want to put up a barrier, Mattie?"
Matthew blinked, having to remember what exactly that entailed. "Yeah."
He did so and Alistair was suddenly crowding him. Matthew started backwards,
only succeeding in pressing against Gilbert. Alistair gently tilted Matthew's
chin up, making him meet his eyes in the castle's fire-lit dimness and exposing
more of his neck to Gilbert in the process. The angles of his face stood out
more in the lighting and the look in his eyes had a thrill shooting through
Matthew stomach. He really need them to talk—
"I know ye have things ta say, leannan," Alistair all but purred at him and oh,
shit, what did he have to say again? "But I need ta hear ye say it again. I
don't think Gilly heard ye tha first time."
"Say what?" Matthew said, distracted as Gilbert nipped at him and Lord have
mercy, but he loved being the center of their attention. He lived for feeling
them both focused on him like this.
"Open yer eyes, Mattie." He hadn't even realized he'd closed them. His glasses
blurred his vision but he could still see the faintest blue light on his mate's
face. Alistair removed his glasses and smiled at him. "Tha's it. Noo, tell us
who ye belong with?"
Oh, that. "You." Gilbert's hands tightened on him at the admission and he
couldn't have stopped himself from spilling one more truth, from running his
mouth more if he'd tried. "I belong to you both." I love you both.
Gilbert said, "Good." He bit him then, one hand slipping under his shirt to
caress his skin and Matthew gasped, eyes never leaving Alistair's.
"I'd said with, Mattie."
Knowing he was more accurate, Matthew smirked up at him. "And I said to." He
pulled Alistair down into a kiss with one hand, the other coming up to card his
fingers through Gilbert's hair as he marked him. He moaned and bit Alistair's
lip. He made a startled sound as Matthew licked over the small hurt. Matthew
pulled away from him, tugging Gilbert's hair up at the same time so he could
kiss him. He followed the silent instruction, fighting the pull a little to
drag his mouth over Matthew's skin until he reached his mouth. By the time the
kiss ended, Matthew's knees were shaky but his voice was strong as he
continued, "I belong to you."
He had been looking at Gilbert as he said it and saw him shake his head. "We
don't owneach other, Liebling. If you belong to us, it's because we all belong
to each other. We belong to you, too."
No, you don't. Not yet, maybe you never will.Reminded of why he had asked them
here in the first place, Matthew closed his eyes and whispered, "If you so
choose." He sighed and then opened his eyes, looking between them, passion
cooling as the gravity of what he was about to say settled in him. He blinked
until he couldn't see clearly anymore and held out a hand, wordlessly asking
for his glasses. Alistair didn't hesitate and Gilbert let go of him and came to
stand his side, the three of them forming a small circle.
"Mattie, wha's wrong?" Alistair asked, probably seeing the way his throat
bobbed with the words choking him.
What he started with was a choice of two evils, though both had the potential
to break their new, fragile relationship apart. But they had a right to know.
He made sure that no part of him was touching them as he asked, "Do you want
the maybe-good news, the bad news, or the worse news first?"
"Worse." Gilbert said decisively. Alistair was just watching him closely.
Matthew cleared his throat, steeled his spine, and dropped his bomb. "You know
when Longbottom said that she thought that I might have been dying? Turns out
she wasn't wrong. I could have died if I had gone untreated for much longer. I
would have died if I was an adult."
===============================================================================
Alistair wasn't sure if he was breathing. Gilbert certainly wasn't. In fact, he
looked like he was going to be sick, probably because he blamed himself for
that rage happening. Which, sure he was partially to blame, but he had reason
to act the way he did and Matthew had refused to call them and no one really
knew what to do at that point. But he still went to Gilbert's side to steady
him, murmuring, "Breathe, Gilly."
He sucked in a harsh breath and gasped out, horrified as he stared at Matthew,
"What do you mean, you could have died?"
Matthew licked his lips, spine still straight but eyes averted. "Remember what
I told you when I first showed you my eyes, Gil? That hunger and exhaustion are
universal constants? Well, my body can't take a full on rage for any long
period of time like that and be completely okay after until I get medical
attention. I'm too human for that. If I hadn't been in the hospital at the
time, I might have died of exhaustion. When I'm an adult, there would be more
strength, more energy in the rage. If it turns out I can't call fire to my
hands like my mother, then I might actually burn myself from the inside out."
Matthew delivered the news like it was the weather report, just the facts,
ma'am,tone flat. Like it didn't matter. And it was infuriating.
No one said anything, the emotion stopping Alistair's words before he could
manage to form them. Eventually, he bit out, "What. The. Fuck."
Matthew flinched.
"I need to sit down," Gilbert said, stumbling to the wall and sliding down it.
He quickly sat, putting his head between his knees. Alistair stayed standing,
because thiswas a fucking problem.
"Why didn't you call us?" Alistair demanded.
"I told you—"
"No, ye didn't. Ye only told us a half-truth. Do ye not think we know ye well
enough ta recognize tha' by noo?" Alistair moved a step close to him, wanting
to shake him. Did he not understand what his death would have done to him? How
could he be so blasé about the fact that he almost died because of them? "Ye
almost died."
"I-I didn't know I was dying."
"Bullshite. Ye tore yerself apart, screamed fer hours, knowin' we could have
helped and ye did not call. Ye hurt yerself. Why?"
To his alarm, tears started swimming in his gaze. He whispered, voice thick,
"Don't make me say it."
From the floor, Gilbert said, "Alistair, stop." At the same moment, Alistair
coaxed, anger broken by the lost look in Matthew's eyes, "Tell us. Tell me,
Mattie, 'cause I swear tha' tha only thing I want ta do is ta make sure it
never happens again."
"I deserved it." Matthew said, words quiet but so sure that they carried in the
small bubble of sound. Alistair's brain refused to process language for a
moment, so it was Gilbert who reacted first.
"No. No, you did not." Gilbert started to get up.
"But I—"
"It does not matter what you did, Matthew. You did. Not. Deserve. To be. Hurt.
You most certainlydid not deserve to die."
Matthew looked at Gilbert then, tears finally running down his face. "I hurt
you!"
"So!? You've never physically hurt me and we're bound to make mistakes in our
relationship, Mattie. I hurt you when I didn't trust or believe you. I let the
fact that you're different overcome the fact that I knowyou and hurt you with
my fear. I hurt Alistair for years without knowing it. I will never forgive
myself for those things, but absolutely no one deserves to go through what you
did, especiallynot you."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize!"
Matthew flinched again and Alistair found the wherewithal to say, "Wha' he
means is tha' ye have nothin' ta apologize fer, Mattie." Jesus, he sounded
lost. He needed to pull himself together.
"You're both angry with me, so I sorta do." Matthew murmured. "It won't happen
again, I promise."
"Christ, Matthew, I'm not angry. I'm fucking terrified and I bet Alistair is,
too."
Alistair swallowed hard but nodded. Matthew frowned at them. "Why would you be
scared?"
Okay, now he was back to getting angry. Gilbert said, disbelieving, "You tell
us you almost died and that you let yourself be hurt on purpose and then you
ask us why we're scared?"
"Matthew, ye were literally out of yer mind wit worry when we were hurt. Ye
were willing ta heal us an' avenge us. Would ye not be scared if we had hurt
ourselves? Would not ye be sick with worry?"
"Of course I would. But that's different."
"How? We are yer boyfriends, yer lovers, yer friends. We care bout ye. Ye know
tha', right?"
"…Yes." Alistair didn't like the hesitation there but didn't have the time to
push because Matthew swayed and staggered. He swung out his arms to balance
himself and Alistair took one side while Gilbert took the other. With them
supporting him, Matthew righted himself but he looked pale. "How long has it
been since I put up the barrier?"
"Maybe 15 minutes?" Gilbert said, exchanging a look with Alistair that spoke
volumes about how much he did not like the current situation.
Matthew said, "Huh. It usually takes me a lot longer to get to this point. I
should sit."
"Ta wha' point, Matthew?" Alistair asked, low and serious, fearing the answer.
"To the warning point. We have fifteen, maybe ten minutes and a lot to get
through." Gilbert and Alistair sat him against the wall, coming to rest on
either of his sides.
"Nope, back up. Warning point for what? What happens in ten minutes?"
Matthew shrugged. "I pass out." Matthew looked between their faces and gave a
hysterical little laugh. "See, you are angry. I don't blame you, though. My mom
raged for like a day,even with dad there, when she got my letter saying that I
went against her direct advice and went through a self-induced rage without
you. She was so pissed." Matthew giggled a little and Alistair was about one
more worrying statement away from screaming and that wouldn't help anything but
his nerves. He'd bet anything that his mother was even more worried than he and
Gilbert because she actually understood what going through a rage would be
like. And Matthew was her child. Hell, he was surprised she didn't show up to
the school the next day to shake some self-preservation into her son.
"Matthew," Gilbert started, strain evident in his voice as he smoothed gentle
hands through blond hair. "Now that the worst news has been shared, you have
about five minutes to tell us two other bits. Start with the maybe-good news. I
feel like we all need some."
Matthew closed his eyes and leaned into his touch, humming. "You're both
invited to come visit over the summer for my birthday. My parents want to meet
you. But I understand if you don't want to meet them. We've only been dating
for a little bit and—"
"I'll go." Alistair said, interrupting him because they were short on time and
he was wary of whatever reasons Matthew would think of related to why Gilbert
and Alistair would not want to meet his parents. Besides, he would like to be
there for his birthday to help him through it, especiallyif that was when his
maturation symptoms got worse. Also, it would be great to talk to his dad about
how the fuckyou dealt with being the spouse if not the soulmate to a Veela and
maybe how the hell to keep the boy he loved away from self-destructive
behavior.
Wait.
Oh.
Well, shit.
And they had only been on one date. Man, that was a kinda desperate. Then
again, he had been working up to this for months so…
Whatever. There were more pressing problems at the moment.
"Me too." Gilbert said immediately after him and Alistair blinked as he noticed
his little revelation had taken no time at all. "Now, what's the bad news?"
Matthew sighed and leaned his head back to rest against the stone. "The visions
you have from my venom. My mom was a good sport about the fact that I've bitten
you, but apparently what you see isn't the future but my…biology's way of
trying to convince you to stay with me. They aren't the future, but are
rather…um."
Blood filled his cheeks, which was a feat considering how weak the spell was
making him. "They're what, Mattie? Tell us so you can take the spell down and
we can talk about it without you about to pass out."
Matthew licked his lips, hesitated for a second more, then said, "They're my
fantasies, altered a little by your own brains to make them believable. So, um.
Sorry you had to see those."
Alistair was gaping at him. I'm not sorry. Whois this boy?
Gilbert, who's brain was still functioning for some reason, said, "Wow. Why is
this bad news?"
"Ah, I've actually been drugging you? Putting my thoughts in your mind without
your knowledge or consent? My venom is trying to manipulate you into staying
with me? That's pretty bad but not as bad as almost death."
"Take down tha barrier, Mattie, so I can explain why I can guarantee we're not
bothered by this one."
Matthew huffed a laugh but ended the spell, sagging against the stone and
panting when it was done.
Alistair threw up his own sound barrier then, covering the entrance of the
hall. Since he didn't control its dimensions and it blocked sound coming from
both ways, Matthew's charm was better. But like hell he was going to let him
pass out just so they could talk.
"I don't have a problem with that." Gilbert said once he saw the light sheen of
a barrier around the arched entryway.
"Same." Alistair said, pulling Matthew into his lap so he could hug him more
easily. He was still shaken by the fact that he had almost lost him before they
had a chance to be together but was unwilling to open the topic again. He was
at his limit for that kind of emotional labor and needed the comfort of his
touch to remind himself that Matthew was fine, was with them, and was safe.
Matthew accepted his embrace, leaning back against him and resting his hands on
Alistair's arms. "How?"
"Well, it's not like it had effects that I'm not okay with, even now. And you
told us as soon as you knew what was going on, so it's not like you were trying
to coerce me to do anything." Gilbert moved so that he was sitting cross-legged
facing them. He leaned forward a little and placed his hand on Matthew's. "This
isn't even close to a deal-breaker, Liebling."
"Am I thrilled tha' they're hallucinations? No." Alistair said, nuzzling
against Matthew's hair. "But I asked fer ye ta bite me, knowin' tha' it would
have some kinda effect and not knowin' wha' tha' effect was. But I don't regret
it. Honestly, I'm a little disappointed they weren't tha future."
"Doesn't mean they can't be." Gilbert said and Alistair met his eyes. He was
right, of course he was. If they managed not to fuck this up and kept their
boyfriend alive, all that they had seen could happen. Matching rings included.
Alistair resumed his cuddling.
"You're not mad?" And now Matthew sounded confused.
"No, baby. Why would we be mad?" Alistair asked, not paying attention to what
he was saying in the least.
"Because it's—"
"Whoa, hold on. Baby?"
Alistair paused in his mindless efforts of comforting himself by showering
Matthew with affection. He focused on Gilbert and smirked. Tone dark and low,
he said, "Oh. Did I not tell ye bout tha'? From tha' one time I had audio with
me hallucination? But tha's not completely right, is it, baby boy? Ye would
know better than me."
Matthew had shuddered at the use of that pet name, head lowered and ears red.
"That's right."
He nipped at his ear. "Tha's right, wha'?"
Matthew inhaled sharply but managed to breathe out. "That's right, sir."
"Good boy." Matthew suddenly relaxed against him at the praise, head tilted
away from him to give him room to do just about anything he wanted, a switch
thrown. But this was neither the time nor the place, so Alistair kept his eyes
on Gilbert as he laid a gentle but lingering kiss on Matthew's jaw then settled
back.
"I…I have so many questions, the first of which being: who do I thank for
this?" Gilbert asked, staring at the two of them, hands braced on the floor
like he needed the extra support.
"This is why we're not mad at ye, Mattie. Yer venom told us things about ye
tha' probably wouldn't tell us yerself. How long would it have taken ye ta tell
us bout this little kink of yers?"
Matthew turned towards him and cuddled against him. He held a hand out to
Gilbert, inviting him closer, and murmured, "I wouldn't have mentioned it at
all. It's embarrassing. Those were my private thoughts. Some of the things I've
thought about…" Matthew shook his head, his face heating against Alistair's
neck.
"Would you not be comfortable with biting us again?" Gilbert asked, side now
flush against Alistair's and hands pulling Matthew's legs in to his lap.
"You would want me to?" He peeked out at Gilbert.
"Uh, yes. At least I would."
"Did yer ma mention any long-term effects?" Like addiction, Alistair thought
but didn't dare say aloud.
"No. My venom is supposed to heal you, not harm you. Other than the
hallucinations and needing to be near me for a short period of time after, did
you have any other problems?"
Alistair shook his head. "No. An' I wouldn't call tha visions a problem. Ye can
bite me again. It's up ta ye."
"I-if you want to. Just, whatever you see…could you not hold it against me? I
wouldn't want you to treat me differently because of it. Outside of the
bedroom, I mean…sometimes."
Matthew hid his face again and Alistair and Gilbert smirked at each other. As
one they said, "Done."
===============================================================================
"Lovi, why did you do that? Why did you have our boyfriends—and probably half
the school by now—thinking that we ever liked each other like that?"
"Pfft, don't look at me like that, maple bastard. Now we know what their
jealousy looks like, which, by the way, check the box for preternatural
jealousy! Gilbert gets handsy and Alistair gets murderous."
"And Antonio gets seductive. But that didn't help anything!"
"Uh, it helped a lot. I distracted my best friend from the fucking labyrinth of
feelings you were dealing with—you were pulling the I'm worthlessface, don't
fuck with me on this—andgot us both laid."
"Ididn't get laid."
"Well, that's not my fault. I even got Tonio to stop being so goddamn gentle
all the goddamn time. This helped all the things. You're fucking welcome. Now,
tell me about the letter."
"…You're going to need to sit down, Lovi. And I need you to promise not to get
mad at me."
"…What did you do?"
(He got mad.)
===============================================================================
"Scottie…about what Mattie said. Have you thought about—"
"Aye. We're not askin' his opinion bout our professions. We're just tellin' him
our decisions."
"Thank God. It's not that I don't think you should do whatever you want but—"
"He would die, Gilbert. I'm not letting somethin' tha' is completely avoidable
happen just because a plan I didn't even make. He's worth more than tha'."
===============================================================================
As much as Gilbert would have liked to go on a date with either one or both of
his boyfriends in the weeks that followed, they were in school and finals
waited for no being. Matthew was dealing with the worst of it, stressing about
scoring well in all of his O.W.L.s so he could place into the classes he needed
next year. Thanks to Matthew's continued assistance, Gilbert wasn't worried
about passing his charms O.W.L. so much as being worried about the test itself.
Last year had been a nightmare; he had been so concerned with his other
subjects that, by the time the charms exam was administered, he was burned out
and blanked out on most of what he'd crammed the night before. Thinking back,
it was partially a timing issue and partially his general trouble understanding
the subject. And, considering his change in career path, that P was moot now.
As he and Alistair were preparing for their N.E.W.T. classes' finals, they also
had the unenviable job of going to the head of their house and telling them why
their two best students at dueling magic were not going to be an auror or a hit
wizard. Professor Adu had watched them grow into skilled wizards over the years
they had been their transfigurations teacher (McGonagall only taught 7th years
now) and house head and had been rightfully confused at the seemingly sudden
change. But they had been supportive, helping them figure out where to take
their studies from here, and that was the most important part.
Alistair, with that brilliant, ambitious mind of his, had decided that he
wanted to find a way to make tech work in magic saturated settings. He'd talked
as excitedly as he let other people see him about weaving a spell into the
device software itself, something that sounded somewhat plausible and
completely over Gilbert's head. Professor Adu recognized that they similarly
knew nothing about computer coding or engineering, but steered Alistair towards
classes heavy on enchanting objects as well as an advanced magic theory
elective on top of his continuing N.E.W.T. classes. Apparently, they would find
some way to translate his work to muggle A-levels so Alistair could go to a
muggle university after all this.
Going to university sounded like a good option for Gilbert, too. It would give
him time to figure out what the hell he wanted to do with his life. Without his
plan, he was lost and completely envious of Matthew and Alistair's surety.
Professor Adu, whose wife was a muggle, just nodded as Gilbert explained his
concerns. They had said, "It's ridiculous that we expect you at fifteen to know
what you want to do for the rest of your lives. Uni will give you that chance
to learn what you want and help you settle. No matter what tradition is, it's
completely reasonable for you to not know and to want to explore your options."
Bless that person, honestly.
Anyway, Gilbert and Alistair were supposed to explore the universities over the
summer. They were told to consider subjects available, reputation, price,
location, and their career services. Adu had given them so many criteria that
both he and Alistair had walked out of that meeting dazed. The notes they had
in their hands made this decision more concrete and Gilbert could see now why
Alistair mentioned talking to Matthew before they did anything drastic when
he'd first brought it up.
The issue was finding the right time to tell him.
The poor boy was running himself ragged. Matthew spent any available time
studying. With Gilbert and Alistair still walking him to class when they could,
he spent the walk with one hand in theirs and the other clutching notes that he
was reading over. He would forget to eat if Gilbert and Alistair didn't take to
bringing him a steady supply of snacks throughout the day and to remind him
about mealtimes. Matthew had apparently tried to abandon a normal sleep
schedule but Vargas was there to make sure he actually slept, pointing out that
the tests would take place during normal people hours.
Gilbert would be hesitant to say it out loud, but he thought that Vargas was
actually starting to like him and Alistair, something that he didn't think
possible after that one disastrous afternoon. He'd caught him looking at them
with approval when they coaxed Matthew to focus on eating or how they never
hesitated to shower his friend in steady affection. Hell, he didn't try to stop
himself anymore from laughing whenever he or Alistair made a disparaging
comment about people still staring at them wherever they went. Antonio was
ecstatic at the change, happy his boyfriend liked most of his friends. Lovino
still snapped at Francis if he got a little too familiar, which Francis loved
to do just to see how he would react. Gilbert knew better and Alistair didn't
care to try to get on Lovino's good side, so they were spared from any increase
in animosity.
Anyway, Gilbert was hesitant to bring up anything too serious whenever Matthew
took a rare moment to relax and just hang out with them. Matthew most spent it
checking in with them, seeing how they were doing, and letting himself kiss
them for more than a second at a time. Since they had gone so long without
being in complete privacy and because of the stress he was under, Matthew was a
little sensitive. Okay, that was an understatement.
Matthew, when he allowed himself to acknowledge it, was a horny mess.
Once, when they had been studying in a relatively deserted study area, he'd
caught Matthew staring at him, expression blank but eyes glowing. Thank God
he's had his back to the room and that they were alone with Alistair at the
table or Matthew would have revealed his secret to the whole school over an
absent-minded daydream. Gilbert had brought Matthew's attention to it and he
had been embarrassed, if panicked over how he'd forgotten himself so easily. He
focused very hard on his studies after that.
But that wasn't the last time Matthew had slipped. When Alistair had to crowd
him against the wall in a heavily-trafficked hallway to get him to close his
eyes and calm downa week before O.W.L.s began, they both knew something had to
give. It had drawn unnecessary attention to them but Matthew had done as he
said, covering his eyes with a hand and breathing. Rumors flew as to why
Alistair had done that, though no one, according to Lovino, guessed correctly.
At dinner, Gilbert and Alistair convinced Matthew to meet them in the storage
room where Alistair had staged their first date later that night. He agreed
quickly when Gilbert murmured in his ear about them finally being alone. In
fact, he'd barely been able to sit through dinner. Lovino had noticed and shook
his head at them all.
Gilbert and Alistair staggered their arrival time, flipping a coin to see who
would get to arrive fifteen minutes before the other (it was easier to get
caught sneaking around in pairs or groups than individually). Gilbert had won
and had only just finished lighting candles to see when Matthew arrived. He'd
barely gotten a syllable out in greeting before a glasses-free Matthew was
kissing him, urging him backwards until he hit the wall. Well if this is how
things are going to be…
Gilbert knew by now how Matthew liked to be surrounded and pressed against
things or between him and Alistair. He reversed their positions and deepened
his kiss, drinking in his boyfriend's pleasure and need. Matthew arched against
him, taking huge gulping breaths but didn't stop kissing him, like he needed
his touch more than he needed air and fuck, but that was hot. He moved down to
kiss his neck, hoping that would give him time to catch his breath. He only
used his air to beg, hands pawing at the edge of his T-shirt, "Please."
He didn't bother saying anything in reply, easily giving into the silent
request to lose his shirt and making quick work of Matthew's for good measure.
Matthew moved his hands over his torso like he couldn't touch enough of him at
once then pulled their bodies together, kissing him again messily. This was
desperation, pure and simple, for him and Gilbert happily gave him what he
needed. He started kissing down his body and Matthew moaned his approval a bit
too loudly.
"Shh, Liebling. I got you," Gilbert whispered into his stomach, kneeling now.
He was tracing his hands up Matthew's trembling thighs when the door opened.
Gilbert halted long enough to make sure it was Alistair before continuing.
"Well, tha' escalated quickly." Alistair said when the door was closed behind
him. He cast a sound proofing spell on the entrance.
"Come here," Matthew said, holding out a hand to him.
"No…" Alistair, trailing off and Gilbert could hear the smirk in his voice. "I
think I wanna watch fer noo."
"Oh, God," Matthew said as Gilbert smiled against his skin and got to work.
Later, when everyone was clothed again and Matthew seemed the most relaxed he
had been in weeks, Gilbert and Alistair had him sitting pressed between them.
He said dreamily, "Damn, I feel great. Brilliant idea. My head hasn't felt this
clear in weeks. Fuck, but I was such a mess. Do you even know how many showers
I—never mind." Matthew cut himself off, brain apparently getting ahead of the
afterglow endorphins enough to keep him from finishing that sentence.
Alistair chuckled. "How many shower's ye had ta take ta keep from jumping us in
tha halls? Some fair idea, leannan."
Matthew groaned and turned his head to hide his face against Gilbert's
shoulder. "Tell him he's being an ass," he grumbled
Gilbert grinned and looked up to meet Alistair's amused eyes. "Our boyfriend
says you're being an ass."
"Eh, I'm always an arse. Tha's me charm." Alistair squeezed the area right
above Matthew's knee where he was ticklish. Matthew jolted in surprised
laughter and grabbed at the hand. Alistair took one of his and brought it to
his lips.
"Yeah, I guess you're right." Matthew beamed at him and Alistair gave him the
most open smile Gilbert had ever seen from him. It crinkled the corners of his
eyes and made his gums show just a little too much to be any kind of practiced.
It had a kind of innocence to it that made Gilbert's heart swell to see on
Alistair. He could be so cynical, that seeing that look on his face and how
Matthew had made him able to make that expression made him love Matthew even
more than he did. He knew then that Alistair loved the Hufflepuff, too.
Gilbert was comfortable with the fact that he loved Matthew, partially because
he'd had weeks to get used to the knowledge. He'd figured out what his feelings
meant when he knew that he would rather see Matthew alive and happy than become
a hit wizard or to even have the chance to be an auror, fighting side by side
with Alistair like he'd always wanted. At first he was surprised, a little in
denial but now it was just a fact he had built into his life. He loved his
boyfriends, his soulmates, and that was nothing to fight against.
Right. So, this seemed like a good time to casually slip in the change in heart
about his career prospects.
"Mattie, I've been thinking…"
"About?" Matthew turned towards him then, face still holding relaxed joy. God,
he hoped that would remain after he said what he needed to.
"About what I was going to do after graduation."
Matthew frowned a little, in confusion not displeasure. "You don't want to be a
hit wizard anymore?"
"No. I think I want to go to a muggle university. There's a whole world out
there that we know is great but we've been limited to that of our families.
There are different kinds of magic and I want to see them all." Gilbert said
like he hadn't been fretting over the right way to say this for weeks.
Matthew blinked at him but smiled again, eyes soft. "Oh, well if that's what
you want to do, I'm happy for you, Gil. Whatever you choose to do, I'll support
you." And Gilbert knew that was true. He knew that if he went on to be a hit
wizard Matthew would say nothing against it, would never mention the toll it
would take on him. That is what made this decision necessary and something he
would happily do. It gave him just a little more time to avoid being an adult,
to enjoy his youth, and he would grab the opportunity with both hands.
He gave Matthew a gentle kiss, telling him without words how much he
appreciated him. How he loved him. After a long moment, he leaned his forehead
against Matthew's and allowed himself to be with him for a second. When he
looked up and met Alistair's eyes, he knew that Alistair knew he loved Matthew.
He smiled and mouthed the word, sap.
Gilbert wrinkled his nose playfully and mouthed back, asshole.
"What brought this on, Gil?" Matthew said, kissing his cheek and squeezing his
hand a little.
When Gilbert hesitated, Alistair steeped in, saying tentatively, "Not jus'
Gilly."
Matthew tensed. "What? What do you mean?"
Alistair cleared his throat and said, "I'm not gonna be an auror."
"Because…?" Matthew urged, mind already working to fill in an answer he clearly
didn't want to hear.
"Because I want a less dangerous job if we're together."
"Why." This was a demand, now, and Gilbert had been right for wanting to avoid
this conversation.
But Alistair was the best at delivering hard news, especially when he knew it
was necessary. So he looked Matthew square in the face and said kindly, "Why do
ye think, Mattie?"
"No. No, you're not doing this. You're both not doing this." Matthew scrambled
from between them and they let him go. He stood and started pacing. Gilbert
stood as well, wanting to calm him. Alistair stayed seated, comfortable.
"Not doin' wha'?"
"You're not throwing away your futures for me. You're not changing your lives
because of me."
"Matthew, we already have and we're both okay with that. We're not throwing
away anything. I wasn't lying a second ago. There are more possibilities for
our future than those the magical world alone can offer. So I won't be a
soldier. I can be damn near anything else if I have the chance and I do."
"It's not that you changed what you want to do, Gil, and you know that,"
Matthew shot back, hands running through hair that now fell past his shoulders
unbound. "If you chose this because you wanted this, I would be fine. But
you're choosing this because of me."
"Why can it not be both?" Alistair asked, expression hard as he focused on
Matthew. "Wha's wrong with adjustin' our lives ta fit you in it?"
"Because you would regret it! You would make this choice now but when you
eventually—when you look back on this and think of what you could have done or
had, I don't want you to regret it."
Gilbert narrowed his eyes and said slowly, "When we eventually…what?"
Matthew looked at him, anguished. "I didn't mean to say that."
"What did you—"
"When we eventually leave him is wha' he means," Alistair said flatly, finally
rising from the floor. Matthew looked between them, helpless.
"Jesus, Matthew. What do we have to do to earn your faith in us? What do we
have to do to make you see that we're here for you and not just for a week or a
month?" Gilbert said, frustrated because didn't they have this conversation
already? It sure felt like they had.
"I'm sorry. That's not—It's not that I don't trust you or think you don't care
about me. I know you do. I just never want you to think on what you could have
been and be unhappy because of me."
"Matthew, I cannot tell ye how I'll feel in ten years. But I can tell ye one
thing I'm damn sure about. If either one of us stayed on the original path an'
ye died because we were hurt doin' our job an' ye could not get to us? Tha's
wha' we would regret. Tha' is somethin' we're choosin' ta live without. Ye are
worth more than a career I don't even want. Yer worth everythin'. Ye are ours
an' we take care of our own. Ye just need ta let us." He was in front of
Matthew then, cradling his face between his palms like he was the most precious
thing in the world. To them, he was. Their relationship was and Gilbert was at
a loss for how to make Matthew see that. Maybe time was the only remedy, time
and their unwavering presence.
"I only want you both to be happy." Matthew whispered into the still air.
Gilbert sighed and came to his side, touching both of his boyfriends with
light, lingering hands. "You make us happy, Matthew. Just give us time enough
to prove it to you. Would that be okay, if we stayed with you long enough to
believe we're not going anywhere?"
"Yes." Matthew reached out to him. "That would be perfect." He turned his head
to kiss Alistair's hand then looked at the redhead. "If you don't want to be an
auror, what do you want to be, hon?"
Alistair gave him that wide, unique smile and started explaining his idea about
integrating magic and computers. He got really involved at one point, hands
gesturing and eyes alight. Gilbert and Matthew shared a look of content
incomprehension and Gilbert gave him a kiss on his temple. They would be okay.
It would take some work, but he wanted more moments like this. He wanted
moments of him and Matthew listening to Alistair wax poetic about computer code
and occasionally meeting each other's eyes in amused and indulgent
companionship. He wanted the feeling of them all relaxing together without some
emergency keeping them alert or some clock ticking over their heads. He wanted
to see Alistair smile at Matthew like all was good with the world more. He
wanted the sex, too, but that was more like a really appealing cherry on the
top of a perfectly crafted ice cream sundae: wonderful but what really made the
experience was everything else that came with it.
They were not going to fuck this up.
===============================================================================
"I am disgusted."
"No, yer jealous." Alistair whispered back, smirking at Francis from across the
very crowded train compartment. Matthew, still a little exhausted from his
exams, was sleeping on Alistair's shoulder. Gilbert, as always, was on the
boy's other side and was looking at them both with an undeniable affection
which probably prompted Francis' comment. Francis was sharing a bench with
Lovino and Antonio, the only one of their friend group without a significant
other.
"No, I am disgusted. I like my freedom, thank you."
"Is that why you broke it off with Eyebrows?" Lovino asked and Alistair wasn't
sure if he should try to defend his little brother or just laugh at imagining
his reaction to the name. He decided to focus on what was being said. He was
never 100 percent okay with the fact that Francis had been hooking up with his
brother on and off for the better part of a year, but they could make their own
decisions and mistakes. He hadn't known Francis had put a stop to the
relationship…if you can call their casual arrangement a relationship. Alistair
was never inclined to think more than a moment at a time what one of his best
friends did with his brother.
Francis shrugged. "There was nothing to break off."
"Arthur thought differently." Lovino said with neutral interest.
Alistair sighed, fraternal instincts rising. "Did ye hurt me wee brother,
Francis? 'Cause then I'm obligated ta kick yer arse."
"No need. He's always had someone else there to comfort him." Francis smirked
at him, having learned enough about who Matthew was for some information to
stick over time. There was something bittersweet in the expression, but
Alistair didn't think this was the time or place to push. He wondered if he'd
missed something happening with his friend while he had been preoccupied with
everything else happening.
"Oh, ew." Gilbert said, wrinkling his nose. "I know we joke about it but how
weird would it be if Alfred was with Arthur. Like, with him." That last had
been directed at Alistair, clearly referring to the soulmate thing. Alistair
thought about it and then told himself to stop because fuck, what a mess.
He managed to say dryly, "It would make Yule interestin' at least."
Antonio shook his head. "How have things been with them since the game?"
"Perfect." Lovino said with a mean smile on his face. "That fucker has avoided
Matthew like I told him to. Turns out he can follow orders, if given enough
incentive."
Antonio sighed and took Lovino's hand, usually the most PDA the Italian
allowed. "Mi amor, that is not a healthy fraternal relationship."
Lovino rolled his eyes. "Hell of a lot healthier than if Matthew lost his near-
endless patience and finally killed his ass." Antonio and Francis both looked
askance at the knocked out Hufflepuff who had only ever been kind to them.
Alistair smirked at them and laid a kiss to his hair.
Gilbert shrugged. "They saw each other at their exams. As I understand it, he
acted like Alfred didn't exist. Considering how upset he'd been when he found
out what happened…I'm going to have to go with Lovino on this one."
Francis shook his head them. "You're really meeting his parents? Today? Isn't
it a little soon?"
Alistair raised his eyebrows. "Fer wha'? Better ta meet them noo than have
introductions when we visit in July."
Gilbert laughed at Francis' skepticism. "Think of it this way: better to have a
month rather than a few hours between nice to meet you and we'll be heading up
to your son's room now."
Francis understood that. Alistair let his friends' conversation wash over him
for the thirty minutes that followed, mind preoccupied with what was about to
happen. None of them had never done the meet-the-parents thing, but his
boyfriends both had parents. Sure, Gilbert's relationship with his was barely
one at all, but he had them. And Matthew liked his parents, actually cared what
they thought of their relationship in a way Alistair and Gilbert didn't stress
over. This meeting actually mattered.
He had been staring out the window, not really seeing anything when Gilbert
touched his thigh. He looked over and saw the concerned question on his face.
Alistair nodded and Gilbert said, looking a little unconvinced, "We're about
five minutes out. I'm going to wake Mattie so we can get ready to go."
His heart was in his throat, pulse speeding, but he tried to at least outwardly
remain calm. "Okay."
Gilbert ran a hand down Matthew's arm, coaxing him awake by gently saying his
name. Lovino snorted and muttered, "For fuck's sake." He then kicked lightly at
Matthew's shin and said loudly, "Wake the fuck up, maple bastard."
Matthew groaned but didn't open his eyes, cuddling more into Alistair's side.
"Fuck off, Lovi. 'M sleep."
He was so fucking cute. Alistair would almost forget and then Matthew would do
something like this and suddenly it was all he could think about.
Lovino said, "You want to introduce your boyfriends to your parents groggy?
Okay, that's fine." Matthew bolted upright, blinking owlishly. "That's what I
thought."
"Where are we? Where are my glasses? Oh, God, have I been sleeping on you all
this time? I'm so sorry!"
"Mattie, calm down." Alistair murmured as Gilbert gave him his glasses. "It's
about time to go."
"And introduce you to my parents. Right. This is fine." It didn't look fine.
Matthew looked more worried than Alistair. "They haven't picked us up from
King's Cross since first year. Hell, I don't know if they've been to London
since then, though mom does travel a lot. And—"
"Liebling, it'll be fine." Gilbert said, combing the blond hair out of his
face.
"Disgusted." Francis muttered under his breath and everyone that understood
couldn't help chortling in response, even Lovino.
The next moments were fraught with activity as the train pulled into the
platform and people rushed to get their things and see their families. Gilbert
had told Ludwig that he would be a couple of minutes and to hang out in a
coffee shop for a bit. Alistair had a train to Wales coming in less than an
hour and he made sure to have his ticket within easy reach. Once they had said
farewell to their friends, Matthew led them to a small section of the rapidly
clearing platform to where Alfred and a couple that could only be Matthew's
parents were standing.
Helena Jones, even with her hair mostly hidden behind a scarf and her eyes
shaded behind sunglasses, was easily one of the most beautiful women he had
ever seen. She wore no make-up, was dressed in what should have been an
unflattering muddy green on formless cloth, and Alistair still thought that he
truly understood now how Matthew could sometimes leave him breathless with a
look. Just look at his mother.
It certainly wasn't that Jonathan Williams wasn't handsome in his own right. He
was tan, the tawny tone of his skin offsetting chocolate eyes nicely. His brown
hair had what looked like natural honey highlights at the top, where the sun
would have colored it. He was built like the men on the cover of the romance
novels his Gran shamelessly read and Alistair saw where the fast developing
definition on Matthew's face was coming from.
Alistair wasn't the only one taking in Matthew's parents. Most people were
sneaking glances at the handsome pair, both of whom were at least 180
centimeters tall. He could guess more than one reason why they usually didn't
come to pick up their children.
"Maman," Matthew said, grin splitting his face as he hugged his mother first.
She returned the gesture tightly and didn't let go as she hissed some very
rapid French at him. Matthew had mentioned something about her being pissed at
him for the rage thing. Alistair exchanged a look with Gilbert as Matthew
seemed to mutter quick apologies and struggled to pull away.
She let him go greet his father and Alistair felt her attention shift to them.
Her glasses were reflective, but he she was watching them now all the same. He
smiled a little in acknowledgment and bowed his head a little, waiting for
Matthew to introduce them before speaking. He didn't know what to say but,
knowing his track record, it would probably be something along line of good job
on giving birth to your son; he's an amazing person and kinky as hell.
Yes, it was best he stayed as quiet as possible.
He glanced at Alfred then and the Gryffindor was standing well to the side,
sullen but blessedly silent. Matthew had told his mother about the Quidditch
match he had the feeling he was in deep shit. He didn't spare another thought
for Alfred as Matthew returned to his and Gilbert's side with a tentative
smile. "So, um, these are my parents? And you know about Gilbert and Alistair…"
He blushed scarlet and they took pity on him.
As one they stepped forward and offered each of them a handshake, all smiles
and charm. Alistair was happy Gilbert was there with him to take half of the
attention and break the ice. "Hello. I'm Gilbert."
"I'm Alistair. It's nice ta meet ye both." Matthew's father took his hand,
squeezing just enough to be polite, not intimidating. He smiled, but his eyes
were assessing, sizing up the boys he knew were doing things he really rather
not know about with his son.
"Likewise," he said, a slight accent to the word reminding him of Antonio.
"We know who you are, of course," Matthew's mother said quietly, probably
hoping to not draw more attention to herself. Her voice was as soothing as a
bubbling spring and Alistair wondered if Matthew could sing. She shook
Gilbert's hand and smiled at them. "It's nice to finally meet you."
"Mom…" Matthew hedged as the emphasis on her words made Alistair's eyebrows
rise. He and Gilbert swapped parents as he said, "Maybe we should get out of
here."
"You have all of your things, Mattie?" Jonathan asked, looking over their carts
before focusing on Matthew. It was almost like he couldn't believe his eyes,
which made sense considering he hadn't seen him since January. Matthew had lost
a lot of the stubborn dregs of childhood, physically maturing to the point that
there wasn't a visible difference between their ages anymore. Longbottom had
given him one last check over before they'd left for the summer and said he was
still physically sixteen, but it was a late sixteen. Either he had aged more
than estimated that first rage, or he was maturing faster than expected.
"Yes, dad." Alfred was already walking through the barrier to the muggle
station.
"Just checking, just checking," Matthew's father smiled at him and, oh, he had
his father's smile. They went, Jonathan commenting to on how much he and his
brother had grown while Helena stayed back to walk with he and Gilbert.
"Tell me about yourselves." She said, moving effortlessly in a walk that seemed
more like the steps to a dance.
Alistair, recognizing that he needed to only answer specific questions or take
his cue from Gilbert, stayed silent as Gilbert said, "What would you like to
know, ma'am?"
"Helena, please. There's no need to waste time on formalities. And whatever you
are willing to share. We are to be family, after all, and will have time enough
to get to hard questions." Alistair was pretty sure the shock was written all
over his face and she laughed at the expression. "The look on both of your
faces. Did you think I was going to give you the third degree? No, my sons will
be going through enough. I would not cause them more stress over their pick of
spouses, no matter how unconventional. I only need to know one thing: do you
love Mathieu?"
Alistair glanced ahead, checking that Matthew was out of earshot and chatting
amicably with his father. "Yes."
"We both do," Gilbert said in a low tone that Alistair himself barely
registered and he was standing right next to him.
"Then take care of him as much as he will allow you and you will get nothing
but aid and welcome from both my husband and I. That does not mean we should be
strangers. Matthew told me in his last letter you both would like to go to
university after you graduate? Did you have an idea for your course of study?"
This was something Alistair could answer. The conversation continued easily
enough as they walked through the station. When they reached the main entrance
hall, Matthew remembered that he'd abandoned his boyfriends to his mother and
he returned with an apologetic smile while his father caught up with Alfred.
"Is everything okay?" Matthew whispered to him, Gilbert talking to Helena about
various majors to consider. She was a great source of information since she'd
apparently used her long lifespan to attend multiple universities and study
different topics around the world.
"Aye, leannan. Better than I expected." He nodded towards where Jonathan and
Alfred were walking. "Does yer pa not like us?"
"No, it's nothing like that. I think he was more thrown by seeing you in person
than expected. Apparently he's too young to have his child bring home two
boyfriends, but he was in good enough spirits. I don't think he wanted to
overwhelm you. Mom can be—"
"I can be what, Mathieu?"
"All encompassing, maman."
She made a sound of amused acknowledgement then said, "Sounds like him. Are
either of you meeting your families here?"
"No. My uncle lives in the city but had to work today. My brother and I were
just going to take a cab home."
"I live with me Gran in Swansea, and my train leaves in…" He looked at his
watch and paled. "A twenty minutes. I'm sorry, I still have ta find me train
an'—"
"It's no problem. It was nice to meet you and I'll see you in July. I'll leave
you to your goodbyes." Helena smiled at them and strode forward, easily
catching up with her spouse and other child. Alistair turned to both Gilbert
and Matthew.
Matthew wasted no time, pulling him into a tight hug. Alistair returned it
easily. "I'll miss you."
"I miss ye already, Mattie." He pulled away to give him a gentle lingering
kiss. When that ended, he kept Matthew's hand in his as he stepped away and to
Gilbert. Alistair couldn't help smirking at him. "It's been a hell of a year."
Gilbert smirked back. "Hell of a year." They kissed and Alistair swore he heard
a bystander say good heavens.
Alistair pulled away from them both, laughing a little. "Take care of
yerselves. I'll see ye in a few weeks. Message me when ye get in."
"How?" Matthew asked as Alistair turned to his cart. He looked at him,
confused.
"Text me? Send me a Skype message?"
"Honey, I don't have your number or your Skype ID." Matthew was grinning at
him, shaking his head.
Alistair did a mental face-palm. "We've been datin' fer six weeks an' ye don't
have me number."
Gilbert rolled his eyes at them. He embraced Matthew and said, "I'll give him
your contact info. Now go before you miss your train."
Alistair waved and hurried away, the last image of them leaning into a kiss
committed to memory.
===============================================================================
Matthew: I'm not home yet in NYC
Matthew: but guess who just apologized
Matthew: in the middle of a transatlantic flight
(reaction posted by Alistair: rolling eyes)
Matthew: I think he did it because mom was sitting between us
Gilbert: he probably wanted you to have time to cool down
Matthew: joke's on him it's been a month and I'm still pissed
Matthew: but I am willing to acknowledge his existence again so whtvr
Matthew: how's your families?
Gilbert: Fritz was sad he couldn't go to the station to meet you
Gilbert: I was right he's more than okay with us
Alistair: Gran wants to know who I'm texting
Matthew: do you not want to tell her?
Matthew: it's okay if you don't
(reaction posted by Gilbert: nod)
Alistair: like hell
Alistair: she smiled and said I was just like mom
(reaction posted by Matthew: aww) (reaction posted by Gilbert: tears)
Alistair: she wants pics and Charlie suggested a video call
Alistair: I don't think he believes Matthew exists or would be willing to date
me
Gilbert: rude
(reaction posted by Matthew: ^^^, confusion)
Matthew: he believes you're dating Gilbert?
Alistair: yeah but we'd been friends since first year Mattie, Charlie knows him
Alistair: shit Gran wants the call would that be okay
Gilbert: sure I want to see C's reaction when he gets a look at Matthew
(reaction posted by Alistair: devil)
Matthew: we have another hour here so okay but the wifi is shitty
Matthew: give me a second to sit down and set up my computer
Matthew: okay
Video Chat Duration: 35:09
===============================================================================
Alistair: Looks like the bite mark wasn't permanent.
Gilbert: damn
(reaction posted by Alistair: lol)
Matthew: Gil, I s2g
(reaction posted by Gilbert: kiss) (reaction posted by Alistair: heart eyes)
Alistair: Wait, it's like 6 am there. Why are you awake?
Matthew: started jogging with dad in the mornings
Matthew: been up for like an hour
Matthew: god I hate running
Matthew: all it does is make my lungs hurt and increase my appetite
Gilbert: …then why are you doing it?
(reaction posed by Alistair: ^^^)
Matthew: I'm super restless
Matthew: and exercise is supposed to help with the growing thing
Matthew: I started yoga too
Matthew: we all go to class as a family it's weird
(reaction posted by Alistair and Gilbert: rotfl)
Matthew: Cali is weird I want to go back to Canada it's too fucking hot
Matthew: do you know how hard it is to find a public indoor pool
Matthew: I can't be in the sun like that I fry like an egg
Gilbert: Baby I have albinism and Alistair's Scottish
Gilbert: we know the life
(reaction posted by Alistair: nod)
Matthew: that's fair
Matthew: one thing I don't get is how Alfred can be in the sun all day and be
fine and look all sporty and tan and I turn into a cooked lobster after 10
minutes
Matthew: our genes are supposed to be identical I call foul
Alistair: yeah well he gets sun and you get us so…
(reaction posted by Gilbert: ^^^)
Matthew: true I would rather have a sun burn everyday than lose you two
(reaction posted by Alistair and Gilbert: heart eyes)
Matthew: ugh I miss you guys
Matthew: do you have time for a call?
Gilbert: hell yeah
Alistair: yeah give me a second
Alistair: I'm good
Video Chat Duration: 01:42:29.
Matthew: okay back from yoga
Matthew: turns out dad hates me cause it was HOT YOGA and I thought I was gonna
die
Matthew: mom got me out before I passed out but WHY DID THIS HAPPEN
Matthew: HE HELPED RAISE ME?
Matthew: also, apparently I'm allergic to peaches now, that's a thing that
happened
(reaction posted by Alistair: gasp) (reaction posted by Gilbert: shock)
Alistair: are you okay?
Matthew: yeah it's not a severe allergy thank god but it did come from nowhere
Alistair: Charlie says he became allergic to black cherries around seventeen
Gilbert: that's fucked up
Gilbert: why are you suddenly allergic to things?
Gilbert: do you need an epi pen?
Matthew: I don't know mom is freaking out a little. Wants to take me to an
allergist
Alistair: uh that sounds like a good idea
(reaction posted by Gilbert: ^^^)
Matthew: nah I hate going to the doctor
Alistair: …
Gilbert: …
Matthew: what
Matthew: it's not like I died
Gilbert: omg
===============================================================================
Gilbert: GUESS WHO GOT AN E ON THEIR CHARMS OWL
Gilbert: (it me)
(reaction posted by Alistair: hands clapping)
Alistair: congrats, Gil
Gilbert: thanks I'm so happy to be free of that holy shit
Gilbert: thanks for all the help Mattie! Let us know how you did when you wake
up
Matthew: Yay! I'm so happy for you! (party poppers)
Matthew: let me go see if the mail's in
Alistair: any time would be great Mattie…
Matthew: I GOT IN ALL THE NEWTS I NEEDED AAAAAAAHHHHH
Gilbert: fuck yes
Alistair: congratulations baby
Alistair: I made a celebratory playlist in prep let me send it to you both
Alistair: done
Matthew: …Honey
Matthew: are you sure you sent the right playlist
Alistair: wait…
Gilbert: hahahahahahahahaha
Alistair: fuck
Gilbert: apparently
(reaction posted by Matthew: lol)
Alistair: don't listen to that
Gilbert: too late
(reaction posted by Matthew: ^^^)
Matthew: oh my (blushes)
Alistair logged off.
Gilbert: no come back
Gilbert: these are good songs
Matthew: how did he find so many
Matthew: they're so specific
Matthew: oh he sent the actual playlist
Matthew: these songs are so sweet holy shit
Gilbert: how did he confuse the names tho
Gilbert: like "congrats on your OWLs" is so not "songs to fuck to"
Matthew: mistakes happen
Matthew: besides it's not like we don't have our own playlists
Gilbert: uh
Gilbert: I don't
Matthew: …
Gilbert: let me see
Matthew logged off .
Gilbert: dammit
===============================================================================
Matthew: only a week left until you're here! (party poppers)
Matthew: I'm so excited
Alistair: gotta say I'm not looking forward to this plane thing
Gilbert: you're not afraid of flying
Gilbert: that's not possible
Alistair: listen
Alistair: I trust myself on a broom
Alistair: I don't trust a glorified tin can hurtling through the air
(reaction posted by Matthew: shock)
Matthew: are you going to be okay?
Gilbert: Charlie's a physicist right? Ask him about aerodynamics and why we'll
be okay
Matthew: I found this app that's supposed to help with a fear of flying I'll
send it to you
Gilbert: send it to me too I wanna help
Matthew: Alistair did you get it?
Gilbert: maybe he got pulled away
(reaction posted by Alistair: ^^^)
Alistair: Charlie got excited about physics and I had a crash course in forces
Alistair: I blame you Gilbert
(reaction posted my Matthew: rolling eyes)
Gilbert: rude
(reaction posted by Alistair: kiss)
Alistair: what do you want to do for your birthday Mattie
Matthew: …
(reaction posted by Gilbert: eyes)
Alistair: besides that
Matthew: there will be time for other things?
(reaction posted by Gilbert: heart eyes, eggplant, wink)
Alistair: maybe I'm wrong but won't your parents want to celebrate?
Matthew: oh that
Matthew: they'll probably want to have meals with me and stuff
(reaction posted by Gilbert: lol) (reaction posted by Alistair: face palm)
Matthew: I'm going to be honest here
Matthew: we're probably not leaving my room much on my birthday if I have a say
Alistair: Matthew we can't fuck all day
Gilbert: he's the birthday boy. let. him. speak.
(reaction posted by Matthew: kiss)
Matthew: idk I'll put on a show in the background. We can marathon something
Gilbert: star trek
Gilbert: TOS is easy to follow if you get distracted
Gilbert: and Matthew hasn't seen it so that needs to be fixed
(reaction posted by Alistair: nerd)
Gilbert: don't act like you didn't lose your shit after watching voyager
Alistair: you just like Spock
(reaction posted by Matthew: eyes)
Gilbert: he's hilarious fight me
Matthew: back to the point
Matthew: I don't think you understand
Matthew: the situation I'm in
Alistair: say more words
Gilbert: I got this
Gilbert: Scottie remember how Matthew was about a week before exams started
Gilbert: and how he's willingly going running with his father
Gilbert: and how he's enduring yoga
Gilbert: and how he's still "restless"
Alistair: …point taken
Matthew: …I feel called out
===============================================================================
It had been three and a half weeks since Matthew had been with his mates. 25
days since he had touched or kissed them.
He was going to combust.
He'd been increasingly agitated for the past week but had tried to control
himself. Matthew knew it had to be his symptoms getting worse as he approached
his birthday. His mom said as much, explaining since he already knew his mates
his body had come to rely on them to calm down. It would get better after
another year but for now he was in hell.
Alfred was trying to be more understanding, trying to make up for being the
worst kind of asshole by being supportive and not teasing him too much. He
wanted to go with their father to pick them up from the airport to apologize to
them in person. Matthew tried to veto it but his parents thought it was a good
idea. Matthew remained unconvinced.
There was a collective family veto on Matthew going to the airport to pick them
up. It was two days before he turned sixteen and he was ready do just about
anything to see them sooner. Everyone was apparently aware of this and thought
Matthew would lose it the second he saw them and do something regrettable. So
Matthew paced like a caged animal waiting for them to get there.
Their flight connection through DC was delayed. Matthew had wanted to go for
another run when he got the news, but it was too hot outside for him and he
swore he could feel the sunburn by just looking at the cloudless sky. He was
also pretty sure his dad was worrying despite his mom's assurances that this
was normal for Veela who found their mate before they were mature.
It was hours later now, and a glasses-less Matthew was forcing food down, his
father and brother at the airport. He stared at the messages from Gilbert that
they were on the ground and getting their bags. He also sent pictures of
Alistair: one where he was ghost white and gripping the arm rests of a seat
tightly, and one where he looked about five seconds from kissing the airport
floor. Matthew felt bad, knowing that he had been so distressed in coming to
visit him. If portkeys weren't so difficult to make and expensive to get for
traveling halfway around the world (not to mention left a pretty inconspicuous
arrival for two people surrounded by muggles with video phones), and they were
thoroughly outside of an accessible floo network connected to the UK, they
could have traveled by magic.
"Mathieu?" He looked up to meet his mother's gentle eyes. They were only a
little darker than his own, though people would often compare them to Elizabeth
Taylor's. She usually spoke to him in French at home to keep up his fluency.
"Alfred says they will be here in ten minutes. They hit traffic but are exiting
the 405 now."
Matthew swallowed and nodded. He stood up to put away the food remaining on his
plate for later. Then he thought to ask, "Mom? Do you think they'll be okay
with the mate thing? I'm telling them after the dream but I don't know how
they'll react. They're so far from home and for me to tell them then—"
As he wrapped his plate and put it in the fridge, she said, "It will be fine. I
do not pretend to understand any mortal man. Even your father confounds me at
times and I've had centuries to figure men out. But they do care for you, a
great deal."
Matthew nodded but otherwise didn't respond. He leaned against the kitchen
counter and told himself to stay still, to wait.
His mother stood leaning against the island, looking him over. At length she
asked, "Are you nervous?"
"About what?"
She smiled indulgently at him. "About why you asked us to magically soundproof
your bedroom."
Matthew's face flared. He muttered, "I thought dad would have an aneurysm when
I brought it up."
"That's another thing I will never understand about mortals. Why are parents so
concerned about what happens in their teenagers' bedrooms? As long as you're
being safe and consenting, I personally just want you to be happy. It's a
natural part of growing up for many. Why heap shame upon it?"His mother shook
her head, shuddering. "In any case, I wanted to remind you there's nothing to
be ashamed of. We are Veela, Mathieu. Whatever else that means, we are to our
cores creatures of passion. Jon knows this but he has that mortal problem of
hypocrisy when it comes to his children."
She tilted her head to the side and smiled at him. "They're pulling up."When
Matthew stepped towards the door, she was suddenly there in front of him. "Wait
until they are inside. Your eyes are changed, remember?"
"But mom—"
"No buts, my son. We've worked hard to remain secret here. Wait but two minutes
more and I'll make sure the other members of our family won't say anything if
you three don't rejoin us for dinner later."
Matthew stilled. That was a deal too good to pass up.
He heard the car then, several doors closing. Then he heard, "Mattie was not
lyin'. It's an oven." He lurched forward unthinkingly but his mother caught his
arm in a firm but gentle hold.
Alfred's voice came, "It's pretty cool today. It was only mid-seventies."
"That's imposs—oh, right. Americans use a different temperature system."
Gilbert.
"I don't care tha' they use tha wrong system; it's too hot. This is a heat wave
back home."
His father's chuckle sounded. "I hate to break it to you, but we're expecting
an actual heat wave to start on their birthday."
That won't be a problem for them, Matthew thought, remembering their
conversations over the last few weeks. Thankfully, Gilbert and Alistair didn't
mention that.
"We'll get the bags; there's someone waiting to see you," his father said. A
key turned in the lock for the side door. "Just leave your shoes by the door
and head on inside."
The door opened. His mother released him and Matthew was moving. The rooms
blurred past him as the sound of shoes dropping registered. Then he was at the
side entryway, a little hall that had stairs to the door then turned further
down into the basement.
He saw Gilbert first. In a t-shirt and loose jeans, he was dressed comfortably
for travel. He seemed a little more toned than when they'd left school,
probably from working out with his brother. Dark sunglasses hid his light-
sensitive eyes and Matthew needed them gone.
His eyes then found Alistair, dressed similarly but with a sweatshirt in a hand
braced against the wall as he pulled off a boot. They were both as stunning as
when they'd parted and he wanted to devour them. Oh, Matthew should probably
say something.
"You're here."
They both looked up at his words, smiles stopped by his expression. Gilbert
came to him in the wider space between the living room and dining room, reached
for him. "Mattie, are you okay?"
Alistair was there too and they were both touching him in concern, hands
smoothing back hair that his mother had convinced him not to cut, hands taking
his. Matthew closed his eyes and shuddered at the physical relief that flooded
him at the contact. He managed to say, "It's been too long since you've touched
me."
He watched concern melt from their faces and Alistair leaned in to kiss him
when his mother called from the kitchen. "Hello, boys. Mathieu, don't you want
to take them upstairs?"
Bless his mother, though she probably just wanted to make sure they were in
private before he utterly lost control of himself. His boyfriends blushed and
called back subdued greetings as Matthew led them wordlessly up the stairs and
down the hall to his room. He had to let one of them go to move through the
house and it was Alistair who held his hand as they walked. It was also
Alistair he turned on once they were in his room and kissed like he was the air
he needed to breathe.
His boyfriend seemed surprised but responded in kind. When Gilbert had closed
the door behind them and came to their side, Matthew turned and did the same
with him. Alistair moved his lips down his neck and said against his skin,
"Hello, Matthew."
They did leave the room later, as they all needed to eat, bathe, get luggage,
etc. But Matthew's mother kept her word and the only reaction he got from his
brother and father was shaking heads. However, his father seemed to note the
dramatic improvement in his mood and treated his boyfriends warmly.
===============================================================================
The next day was spent out and about, Gilbert and Alistair choosing to go on an
actual date with Matthew now that they had the chance and free time. They
couldn't stay outside for long due to obvious reasons and Matthew kept the
sunglasses on even while indoors due to how changeable his eyes were now, even
though it meant he walked around without being able to see well for most of the
day. Gilbert still had a great time, he and Alistair mocking the inane
decorations and sales that were apparently a tradition in the States at the
beginning of July. They'd walked around an unnecessarily huge shopping mall, he
and Alistair buying with some saved money gifts for Matthew. They went to the
movies to see the most recent superhero film, the only genre they could all
agree on. They'd spent time in the arcade where Alistair handed he and Matthew
their asses in every game they played, but it was all in good fun. At the end
of the day, Matthew bought them all ice cream and they walked back to his house
desperately trying to eat it before it dripped all over them. They had time to
just be the teenagers that they were, barely able to look away from each other,
and Gilbert loved every second of it.
But there was something that was eating at his mind. A thought had been poking
at him for weeks and all the fun and happiness they were experiencing made him
need to address it all the more.
Choice. Something about that word was bothering Gilbert, not because he was
diametrically opposed to having agency, but for how Matthew used it.
"You will always have choices, I promise," he'd said, that rainy morning he
first showed Gilbert what he was.
It was he and Alistair who chose whether or not Matthew marked them. Matthew
had said it was too early in their relationship but now he knew he was still
fully expecting them to leave him at any point.
Even when thoroughly embarrassed about the fact they knew about his fantasies,
it was still Alistair and Gilbert who decided if the biting would continue.
That had been more about what they wanted, not what Matthew was comfortable
with.
When Gilbert had tried to say that if Matthew belonged to them they belonged to
him, his only response and the one that sobered the moment was, "If you so
choose."
That very day, when asked if he wanted to do something, Matthew had shook his
head and smiled at them. "I want you to choose."
Then he had a horrible thought.
"Matthew," he started, voice serious enough to catch Alistair and Matthew's
attention immediately. They'd been chatting lazily, relaxing in Matthew's room
after dinner. Matthew and Alistair were lounging on Matthew's window seat,
Gilbert, leaning against the wall next to them. Gilbert should be just as
relaxed as they were, shouldn't be saying anything, but this…this had the
potential to break something in him and he neededto know.
"Yes? What's wrong, Gil?" He sat up, reaching to touch Gilbert's arm, the
picture of concern. Gilbert didn't stop him, basked in his touch for a moment,
because he didn't know if he would be able to do it again any time soon if
Matthew gave him the answer he feared.
He picked up Matthew's hand and kissed it gently before looking in his eyes and
saying, "I need to ask you a question and I need you to be completely honest
with me."
"Of course," Matthew said, like he hadn't been actively hiding something from
both him and Alistair for the two months. "Where is this coming from? Did-did I
do something wrong?" Fear crept into his eyes then, into a tremor in his voice.
Alistair moved to rub Matthew's back, soothing him. "No, Mattie. Ye did
nothin'." He shot Gilbert a confused look which he'd earned but ignored. He
kept his eyes on Matthew, needing to watch his reactions carefully.
"From the start, you talked about choice. Iwould always have a choice. Alistair
and Icould choose if we wanted something from you. We were always given an
escape route from anything that involved you." Matthew had gone pale as he
stared at him, eyes wide. He looked like he was bracing for a blow to fall, not
a physical one because he knew Gilbert would never hurt him, but an emotional
one.
"Gilly—" Alistair tried to cut him off, seeing the effect this was having on
Matthew, but Gilbert shook his head.
"No, Scottie. This is something we both need to know. Matthew, I'm not asking
you to tell us everything, but I need to know this one thing: did you have a
choice?"
Gilbert wasn't sure Matthew was breathing. He let out a barely audible, "What?"
The fact that Matthew didn't brush the question away as foolish immediately
made Gilbert all the more frantic for an answer. "Do. You. Have. A. Choice. Did
you chose to be with us?"
When Matthew stared at him for a too long moment, slack-jawed and eyes
unfocused, Alistair let go of him like the touch burned. "Oh, my God."
"Did you have a choice, Matthew?" Gilbert demanded, voice low and shaking
because he needed him to say yes.
What he got was a quiet, "No."
The ground slipped from under his feet as the world shattered.
===============================================================================
This is not how Matthew envisioned this happening.
The day had gone so well! He was going to explain everything to them in less
than 12 hours, after their shared dream. He'd just needed a little more time!
Alistair came to stand next to a devastated Gilbert. Alistair didn't look far
behind, horror clouding his features and oh, God, Matthew was going to lose it.
Panic clawed at his throat and this couldn't be happening. "Have we been
forcing yethis entire time? Have ye not wanted any of this?"
"No," Matthew rushed to say, choking on everything he had left to say but might
not get to. "No, that's not what I meant. Of course I want you."
"Then what did you mean, Matthew?" Gilbert asked woodenly, like his answer
didn't actually matter because he had already made a decision.
"Please," Matthew said, tears coming to his eyes as everything he wanted seemed
to slip through his fingers. "Please, let me explain."
"Explain?" Alistair said, shaking his head. "Ye jus' said tha' ye didn't chose
ta be with us. Tha' ye have no choice when it comes ta us. Wha' could possibly
explain tha'?" And he looked stricken, a vulnerability on his face that Matthew
had never seen before and couldn't stand knowing he was the reason for it.
He had to do this now, right now, before it really was too late.
"I couldn't chose how I was made and I was made for you."
They both froze at that. "What?" Gilbert asked.
It was time. They had to know, if only to give him another chance, to
understand what they were to him. "I am your mate. I was made for you both. I
was yours before I was born and I will be yours forever, whether you want me or
not. Fate gave me to you, but did not give you to me." They stared at him,
expressions going into slack shock, but didn't say anything. They just looked
at him as tears spilled out of his eyes, but he had to keep talking, had to
make sure they heard him.
"I could not choose who my venom would heal or grant pleasure. I could not
choose who could start my hell-puberty early or who could make me lose myself
at a touch. That is what I mean when I say I did not have a choice. But, God,
why would I ever choose differently?
"I could have chosen to ignore what I felt for both of you, to let this time
pass without ever letting myself near either one of you. I could have known for
sure I was yours and still never have let myself near you, ending up miserable
and possibly insane by the time I was eighteen. But this isn't even about that.
In what worldwould I not have chosen both of you if I had the choice to be with
the men I love?"
That seemed to get to them, so Matthew continued, tears streaming down his face
now even as he refused to look away from them. The words continued to tumble
out of him. "Yes, I love both of you and not because fate said I had to. I love
you, Gilbert, for your determination, the way move, your stupid laugh, and how
you look at me like I'm the best thing you've ever seen. I love you, Alistair,
for your mind and your dreams and your past and how you give me your smiles
freely when you give them to so few people. And if I had a choice in this, I
would choose you both, over and over again. I make sure you know you can choose
to live without me because I want you to be happy more than I want to be sane.
I know I'm not—I know I don't deserve you but please, please understand that I
would do anything for you, if it meant you would be happy, even if it meant
letting you go." Matthew sobbed then, voice failing him.
"Oh, Mattie." Alistair said quietly, coming to him to pull him into his arms.
Matthew buried his head into his chest and cried out these months of knowledge,
the weeks of hiding this from them, of carrying the burden alone. He felt
Gilbert against his back, hugging them both as he pressed a kiss into Matthew's
hair.
"Liebling—" Gilbert started to say, tone gentle now, but Matthew cut him off.
"I'm sorry. I'm sosorry. I was going to tell you I was your mate but I wanted…
well, I guess it doesn't matter. But—"
"No, Matthew, it does matter what you want. That's why I asked the question in
the first place, because I wasn't sure if you really wanted this. I needed to
be sure you knew you had choices, too, that you will neverbe forced to do
anything with us. When you said you didn'thave a choice, it broke my heart
because I didn't know how much of these past months were something you did not
choose."
Alistair asked then, "Mattie, do ye not think we want ye ta be happy, too?"
"I…didn't think about it like that." Matthew said, the warmth of happiness
spreading through him at the thought. They want me to be happy. It was obvious
when broken down to that simple sentiment, and damn well should have been a
requirement for any relationship he had let alone one as important as this, but
it just…never occurred to him.
"Well, don't forget it in tha future, yeah?" Matthew nodded against him and
Alistair squeezed him tighter for a moment. "Noo, why did ye not tell us this
earlier? Wha' did ye want?"
Matthew hesitated before looking up into those peridot eyes he loved and said,
"I wanted you to be selfish." He pulled from between them then to be able to
look at them both. "I give you choices, yes, but I want you to chooseme. The
onlyperson who'd ever chosen me before was Lovino. I wanted you to want me
without knowing I was made for you, without knowing any negative consequences
for me if you chose something else. I've only ever wanted to be someone you
were with out of selfish desire rather than a sense of duty."
Gilbert and Alistair were back to staring at him like he had grown another head
and it made Matthew uncomfortable. Each passing second made him all the more
aware of the fact neither of them said they loved him back after his
declaration and what he just said went right back to that. He needed an exit
strategy to this conversation, like, now. He forced a laugh and pulled away
from them. "I look a mess, I'm sure." Matthew winced at that, remembering how
blotchy and red his face and chest got after crying. "I'll be right back!"
He fled through the door and they didn't stop him.
Matthew's head was spinning and he wasn't quite getting enough air. They don't
love me.
The weight of that realization was crushing and the tears came back. He
wandered towards the bathroom, trying to stop his useless crying or to at least
get out of the hallway. He tried to console himself: they had only been dating
a couple of months and were still getting used to the relationship. He'd just
said it too soon! In a couple more months they would feel the same about him.
Or maybe a year? Or… or…
Oh, who was he kidding? This was Gilbert Beilschmidtand Alistair Kirkland. They
would never love him, a young Hufflepuff that came with too much baggage. He
should be grateful they were even dating him, were willing to put up with his
many, many needs. Asking them to love him on top of that…
"Matthew?" Came the familiar voice of his father, questioning, and then there
was a rush of footsteps towards him. He blinked and focused on his father's
worried face, his rich brown eyes scanning his son. "Son, what happened? Did
they hurt you? Did-"
"Dad." Matthew said quietly, weakly and that stopped his father in his tracks.
"Dad, I messed up."
His knees gave out then and his father caught his fall, settling Matthew on the
ground, back to the wall. His father knelt before him and tried to talk to him,
"Matthew, what do you need? What happened?"
"I told them."
"Told them what?" His father's hands moved restlessly in front of him, like he
was trying to figure out what to do but wasn't sure if it would help his son or
make the situation worse.
"That I'm their mate. That I was made for them. T-that I loved them." He was
staring straight ahead, unseeing as water dripped down and off his face.
His father sighed. "And they didn't say it back." Matthew shook his head,
shudder wracking his body. "Mattie, look at me."
He met his father's eyes with some difficulty but only saw kindness there. "I'm
going to tell you something that I never want you to forget, okay?" He nodded
and his father smiled at him gently. "Men are idiots. Being someone's mate
doesn't change that."
Matthew blinked, trying to clear his vision. "Huh?"
At that moment, his bedroom door opened.
===============================================================================
When Matthew closed the door as he went to go wash his face, probably needing a
moment to himself, Alistair looked at Gilbert. "Does he not know us at all?"
Gilbert sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "He does, but you know he has
blinders on when it comes to how he sees himself."
"But really, us doin' anythin' out of duty? When was tha last time I did
somethin' I didn't want ta outside of class, let alone over somethin' like
this?" Alistair sat on the edge of Matthew's bed, thinking over everything
Matthew had said. Christ, but this was so far from what he and Gilbert had
discussed. He didn't want to consider how their relationship with him was
biologically unequal if he'd understood him correctly.
And the sheer lengths Matthew would go for them—
Gilbert came to stand in front of him and asked, eyes sad, "Do you think I
should have waited to ask? I was so worried about his answer that—"
"No, love. We needed ta know tha' much at least." Alistair started to draw
Gilbert in for a kiss when he realized something made him freeze and then
panic. "Gilbert. Gilbert we never answered him."
Gilbert startled as Alistair stood abruptly. "Answered him? What—you mean that
he loves us? He hasto know, Alistair."
Alistair shot him an incredulous look. "He was surprised we wanted him ta be
happy. Do ye really think he knows we're in love with him?"
They just looked at each other for only a second before all but running to
bedroom door. Alistair tore it open and they entered the hallway, almost
tripping over each other. About halfway down the corridor sat Matthew, face wet
with fresh tears, with his father crouched before him. Jonathan's face
transformed from gentle amusement to stern disapproval, but Alistair wasn't
concerned with him. He looked Matthew in the eye and said, without further
preamble, "I love ye, too."
"We both love you, Matthew. We thought you knew or we would have said it
sooner." Gilbert said by his side.
Matthew looked floored, utterly shocked at their words and Alistair wasted no
time in going to him. He knelt next to Matthew, took his face in his hands. If
English didn't work, he would say words that Matthew wouldn't have to think
about. He put all his love for him into his expression and voice as he said,
"Chan eil caoineadh, mo leannan bòidheach. Tha sinn gaol agam ort, agus mar sin
gu mòr." (Do not cry, my beautiful sweetheart. We love you, so very much.)
"Oh," was all Matthew said in response, the light of hope and joy returning to
him. "Really?"
"Mattie," Gilbert said, kneeling on his other side and Alistair allowed him to
turn his head to see their pale boyfriend. "How could we not?" He leaned into
him and just let their foreheads touch.
Matthew's father stood and Alistair met his eyes unflinchingly as he towered
over them. He was smiling faintly as he shook his head, amusement only seeming
to deepen as Alistair held his stare. "You'll have your hands full, Mattie.
Remember what I said. Goodnight, boys."
They all murmured some form of goodnight as Matthew's father headed down the
stairs. Alistair then said, "Let's move this ta tha bedroom."
Gilbert and Alistair helped Matthew stand, his legs shaky. Alistair exchanged a
look with Gilbert as they made their way back to Matthew's room. Matthew was
steady by the time Alistair closed the door, still looking like the foundations
of his world had been upended. He asked, almost to himself, "How would I have
known? Neither of you said anything."
"I thought I was being obvious," Gilbert said, hugging Matthew against him. "I
thought I told you through every touch and glance how I felt about you. And
Scottie—" Gilbert snorted. "Scottie was definitelyobvious. You know the only
time he smiles completely without reservation is when he smiles at you?"
Alistair jolted. He didn't want Gilbert to think he loved him less, hadn't even
realized there was a disparity in his performed affection. "Gilly—"
"Hey, I'm not bothered by it," Gilbert said, giving him a gentle smile. "I know
you love me. I never doubt that, not anymore. But you love Mattie differently
and that's okay. I love him differently, too."
Alistair stared at both of his boyfriends, at his soulmates, and smiled. Well,
soulmates was apparently the wrong word, but it still felt right. This thing,
this love between them didn't feel lopsided; it felt equal. He went to them,
kissing Gilbert's cheek and Matthew's forehead. He looked into familiar blue
eyes and said, "Neither of us are very selfless, Mattie. Gilly's a hedonist an'
I couldn't be arsed ta think beyond meself, usually. So know tha' when we chose
ye, over an' over again, because we will, tha' we are bein' tha most selfish
bastards alive." He kissed Matthew's lips, taking what he wanted from him,
proving just how selfish he could be. When he pulled away, Matthew was beaming
at him.
Alistair just shook his head with a quirk of his lips and continued, "Now tha'
tha's settled, how about ye explain exactly wha' this mate thing means."
===============================================================================
Later, after Matthew had explained all that he knew and all of what that meant
for Gilbert and Alistair, they curled against each other, ready for sleep and
exhausted from the day's emotional trials. Just before darkness stole his
consciousness, Matthew heard Gilbert say, "Hey, Mattie?"
"Hm?" He answered at the same time Alistair shushed them, green satin eye mask
firmly in place.
Gilbert ignored Alistair to ask into the still air of the room, "Does my laugh
really sound stupid?"
It made Matthew smile but Alistair groaned, blindly reaching a hand up to run
it gently down Gilbert's face. "Feckin' sleep, Gilbert."
Matthew laughed and turned his head to kiss the closest spot on Gilbert's
chest. He hoped that took the sting out of his words as he said, "Yes. It's
pretty silly, but I love you anyway."
Gilbert made a considering, not-quite happy sound of acknowledgement but only
held Matthew tighter against him. Matthew, truly relaxed in a way he hadn't
been in far too long, fell asleep within a matter of minutes, his mates
following him not long after.
And as they slept, they dreamed.
Chapter End Notes
     Lovino and Helena are the real MVPs.
     If you like this OT3, good news: I will be writing a *short*
     organized crime AU. (Edit 8.25.17: if you look at that story, it
     becomes clear I don't know what short means). Blame the Spotify
     playlist I listen to while working (while doing actual legal work,
     not this; I had the Arctic Monkeys on repeat for this).
     If you're wondering about Alistair's endearment, I have indeed
     changed it so that the origin was Scots Gaelic because google
     translate has a button for that now. If you are fluent, please
     message me/leave a comment, especially if something is wrong.
     Also, sorry for all the depression. If you were wondering, yes, I do
     have it. Have had it for 10 years now. Matthew was better adjusted at
     15 than I was.
     Chapter title is a mash up of lyrics from Halsey's "Strange Love" and
     the Arctic Monkey's "I Wanna Be Yours." "Everybody wants to know if
     we fucked on the bathroom sink…They know you walk like you're a god.
     They can't believe I made you weak." / "Secrets I have held in my
     heart are harder to hide than I thought. Maybe I just wanna be
     yours." (Seriously go listen to the latter at least and tell me what
     it makes you think of. Comments are love and validation.)
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