Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/4664883.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage, Major_Character_Death
  Category:
      F/F, F/M, M/M
  Fandom:
      Supernatural
  Relationship:
      Cain/Dean_Winchester, Cain/Castiel/Dean_Winchester, Michael/Adam_Milligan
  Character:
      Dean_Winchester, Cain_(Supernatural), Sam_Winchester, Claire_Novak,
      Crowley_(Supernatural), Jesse_Turner, Adam_Milligan, Ruby_(Supernatural),
      Anna_Milton, Meg_Masters, Annie_"Alex"_Jones, Krissy_Chambers, Castiel,
      John_Winchester, Bobby_Singer, Abaddon_(Supernatural), Samandriel_
      (Supernatural), Cody, Connor, Michael_(Supernatural), Benny_Lafitte,
      Alastair_(Supernatural)
  Additional Tags:
      Poverty, Daddy_Kink, Sugar_Daddy, Prostitution, hooker!Dean, John!Cain,
      asexual!sam, Drugs, Cocaine, Twink!Cas, Bottom!Cas, bottom!Dean,
      top!Cain, BDSM, Age_Play, Non-Sexual_Age_Play, Spanking, Rimming, Anal
      Sex, Oral_Sex, paid_sex, Angst, Little!Dean, sorta_-_Freeform,
      Daddy!Cain, Jealousy, Jealous_Dean, Minor_Character_Death, Starvation,
      Abuse, Alcohol_Abuse/Alcoholism, jealous!claire, Sex_Party, bad_bdsm,
      Safewords, Rape_Mentions, Dyslexia, Dyslexic_Dean, Domestic_Fluff,
      Pining, Underage_Sex, Teacher-Student_Relationship, Homelessness,
      Bullying, Threats, online_bullying, Threats_of_Rape/Non-Con, Non-
      Consensual_Groping, Suicidal_Thoughts, Suicide_Attempt, Sexual
      Harassment, Harassment, Surgery, Rape/Non-con_Elements, Threesome,
      Fights, Beating, Gifts, Flirting, Kept_Boy_Castiel, Depression, Depressed
      Dean, Murder
  Stats:
      Published: 2015-08-27 Updated: 2015-10-21 Chapters: 7/? Words: 49548
****** Back to Black ******
by unholyseraphs_(orphan_account)
Summary
     Dean Winchester never meant to be a hooker, but sometimes, desperate
     times call for desperate measures.
Notes
     Hello!
     Gosh, it's been a while since I've posted a chaptered fic on here. I
     hope you enjoy friends.
     Expect angst, also, check the tags often, I'll probably be adding or
     detracting. Thanks!
***** Chapter 1 *****
The blissful moments before the sun quite made it up over the trees to peer
through sheer curtains were the moments Dean loved the most. They were always
so beautiful and they were the times when his bed always felt the most
comfortable and he was warm and happy. He would sigh, roll over, and curl
around his pillow to sleep some more, because that’s what those moments called
for.
 
However, now was not one of those moments.
 
“Dean,” Sam yelled through the door as he pounded his fist on the wood.
 
Dean groaned and slowly peeled his eyes open. He was late, which never
happened, since he was always up early to make sure breakfast was made, lunches
were packed, and the housework could get started. “One day,” he growled to
himself, glaring at the water stained ceiling. “Just one day to myself, that
too much to ask?”
 
“Dean!”
 
“I hear ya!” he snapped back, finally getting up enough to pull on pants and a
t-shirt over his head, pulling the door open. “I’m sorry, I think I forgot to
put the alarm on last night.”
 
Sam sighed and went downstairs with Dean on his heels.
 
“I’m sorry, Sammy,” he whined as he went to dig through their freezer for some
possible frozen waffles left over. There was one in the back and it was freezer
burnt to hell and back. “Damn.”
 
“I’ll just eat cereal,” Sam sighed as he pulled a box down from the top of the
fridge.
 
“What about the others?” Before Sam could answer, Dean was running back
upstairs to knock on Claire’s door. He could already hear the angry emo music;
it was not going to be a good day. “Claire?” he said, poking his head in.
 
“Hey!” she squealed as she covered up her bra and chest. “Knock, fuckface!”
 
“I did knock!” Placing a hand over his eyes, Dean tried not to sigh or roll his
eyes too much. “I’m sorry I’m late with breakfast, it’s a cereal day today,
alright?”
 
“Of course it is,” she said darkly.
 
“I’m sorry.” He quickly ducked out of the room before she could throw something
at him and then he was going down the hall to knock on Adam’s door.
 
“What?” came the muffled response.
 
“Breakfast and school time, Kiddo,” Dean replied, which only earned him a glare
as Adam stormed out of his room.
 
“You’re not my dad,” Adam snapped as he rushed down the stairs, almost tripping
over Claire on the way.
 
“Watch it!” Claire snapped as she walked over to the bathroom, which Dean
happened to be almost in front of. “You gonna move or do you want me to pee all
over the floor like the dog Sam wants but you’ll never get?”
 
He clenched his jaw and slowly stepped to the side, trying not to overreact or
be overly angry at her. She was sixteen and had all of those female hormones
going on in her system, but he’d been awake for roughly ten minutes and was
already regretting the decision to be awake and out of bed. “Sorry, Your
Highness,” he said coldly.
 
“Whatever, Dean.” The bathroom door slammed in his face.
 
With gritted teeth, Dean slowly spun on his heel and walked down the hallway to
the last bedroom to knock on the final door. Maybe if he was lucky Jesse would
actually talk to him and not just silently stare like usual. “Jesse?” he called
with a light knock.
 
There was some shuffling and then the nine year old boy appeared at the door,
looking up at him with wide eyes. He didn’t say good morning or hello or any
kind of greeting. As usual, he just stared.
 
Dean slowly knelt down to his level, so they could be eye to eye. “Mornin’,” he
said with a smile. “Sleep well?”
 
Jesse shrugged, but still, not a peep.
 
“Okay, look,” Dean timidly reached to touch Jesse’s shoulder, but the boy
pulled out of his touch before he could. He dropped his hand and his head,
ready to give up, but he couldn’t give up. It wasn’t right or fair. “Jesse, I’m
really tryin’ here. Your… Look, I know you want your Mom to come back, okay? I
get it. I wished mine woulda came back, too, but you’re here now-.”
 
“Mother will come back,” Jesse replied, which almost made Dean startle. He’d
hardly heard the boy speak, not even a hello when he’d brought him home. “Or
Dad.”
 
Dean gritted his teeth. John Winchester had left him high and dry with his rag-
tag group of illegitimate children a long time ago. Sam and Adam were almost
the same age, with Sam a senior in high school and Adam a junior, it was
frustrating to think that his father had cheated on his mother so early on. But
he had.
 
They hadn’t even meant to meet Claire, that had been accidental.
 
She’d shown up on their doorstep with a DNA test as she’d searched for her
biological father after her mother had had a mental break and the man she’d
called father her whole life had left them. Dean was fairly certain that his
father had more kids out there, just waiting to be found or to show up on his
porch stoop.
 
"Dad isn't coming back," he said, which was probably cruel and mean to say to a
nine year old, but it was the truth. "And if he doesn't it'll be because he
rant outta money and wants ours." 
 
Jesse glared and walked around him without another word. Dean sighed and slowly
stood up, tiredly walking toward the bathroom to knock on the door. “Claire,
are you coming or not?” he called.
 
“Ew,” she replied as she pulled the door open, giving him a nasty glare. “We’re
related, moron.”
 
“Oh- Jesus!” Dean covered his face at the implication. “Go downstairs and eat
your fucking breakfast, that is not what I meant! You’re too young to be
thinking about that anyway.”
 
“No I’m not,” she said with a laugh as she headed downstairs.
 
Dean sighed heavily and leaned back against the stained wall, wishing the house
didn’t look like shit. It was the only one he could barely afford. He wanted a
better house with more room so he could have an actual bedroom and not be
stuffed in what had used to be a closet, but the kids needed bedrooms more than
he did.
 
“I said give it back!” Claire screeched as Dean walked down the stairs.
 
“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” He held up his hands and went to break up what was going
on. “What the hell is going on, huh?”
 
Claire glared at Adam and pointed to the notebook he had in his hands. “That’s
mine, he won’t give it back.”
 
“Adam.” Dean held out his hand. “C’mon, give it back.”
 
“She’s been writing porn in it,” Adam said as he handed it over to Dean. “It’s
gross, you should read it.”
 
Claire made a grab for it, but Dean pulled back to open it and skim some of the
writing. The terms cock and pussy stood out so fast, he felt his face turn red.
The dreaded teenage glare was now on him, so before he could read any further,
Dean handed the notebook back.
 
“Thank you,” she snapped as she stuffed the notebook into her backpack. “For
your information, it’s fanfiction.”
 
“Okay, okay, did you guys get your breakfast?” Dean asked as he went to quickly
try and make everyone lunch. They were extremely low on food, but he didn’t
have enough cash to give everyone for school lunches.
 
“Yes,” came a collection of groans.
 
“Good.” Dean pulled out the paper bags, bread, and peanut butter to make
sandwiches all around. “Okay, um…” He slowly did a little spin to look for
something else to give them to eat.
 
“You might wanna go grocery shopping,” Claire said, sounding annoyed. “It’s
your job.”
 
“I know, I know…” He ran a hand along the back of his neck, feeling the stress
already pressing into his head. He’d have a migraine soon enough. “I’m sorry,
I’ve been busy this week-.”
 
“Yeah, with your girlfriend,” Adam snapped.
 
“Hey-.” Dean glanced back at them. They all looked angry, even Sammy, who was
usually on his side. Okay, so he’d been spending a lot of time with Cassie,
trying to fuck his stress away. Last night had been another late night and he’d
forgotten to run to the store with what little cash they had. “You’re telling
me I don’t deserve to go out and….” He trailed off.
 
“You done?” Claire asked.
 
“Yeah, I’m done,” he grumbled back, finally producing some stale chips and
trying to give everyone a fair share, but Adam ended up with less than Claire,
and that caused a fight. “Outside!” He pointed to the door. “Battle it out on
the front lawn before the bus, go, go.”
 
Sam took his lunch bag and glared at him on the way out. “Store, Dean.”
 
“I know!” he yelled, fed up with being told how to live his fucking life by a
bunch of teens. Immediately, he felt guilty and tried to run after Sam to
apologize, but he was already halfway to the bus and it was waiting on them.
Again.
 
He slumped back against the back door and looked up at the sky. “One day, too
much to ask for, huh?”
 
Of course, there was no reply, which Dean supposed was good since if God
started talking to him, it’d be a mental break, not a divine intervention.
Instead, Dean pulled himself back together to head inside, take a quick shower,
pull on some clothes that didn’t smell too bad, and head out to work. He was
probably late, but hopefully Ellen would be understanding.
 
===============================================================================
 
 
“Fired?” Dean stared at Ellen as if she’d lost her mind. “But- Elle-...” He
trailed off, unsure of how to even beg her for the job back. “The kids…”
 
“I’m sorry, Dean,” she said, looking guilty and sad. At least she really did
sound sorry. “I know you need this job, but I also need someone who will show
up to work on time everyday and not constantly be calling off for one reason or
another.”
 
Dean stammered and felt like the world was going to end any moment. Without his
job as a dishwasher, they were really fucked. He barely made enough to pay for
rent and everything else, and he couldn’t go on unemployment again. He was only
twenty-six; this should have never happened to him in the first place. He
should have graduated high school, gone to college, been living his life.
 
But no.
 
He was stuck raising ungrateful teenagers and giving up his whole life for
them.
 
And now, he was going to disappoint them again.
 
“There’s nothing I can do to make you reconsider?” he asked, his eyes glued to
the floor, feeling helpless.
 
“I’m sorry, Dean.” Ellen shrugged a little. “I wish I could keep you on, but I
can’t just because I feel sorry for you.”
 
“Right.” Locking his jaw and shutting the doors on his emotions and feelings,
Dean stood up and walked out of the office stiffly. It had been stupid of him
to think he could hold down a job and be a parent and have a social life, just
because the Harvelles were family friends.
 
Jo called his name a few times as he walked out, but Dean just stormed out to
his car and climbed in. Muscle memory kicked in, while his mind wandered to
further self-deprecation. It was easy to hate himself, when he was such a
fucking failure. For God’s sake, he hadn’t even made it passed the tenth grade
before dropping out of school. His education before then had been shitty and he
couldn’t read much, not because of his lack of a reading level, but because
words were difficult. The letters liked to jump around on him and he was
constantly writing things wrong.
 
He always had Sam write letters or official documents so he didn’t fuck
something up.
 
Soon, Dean found himself outside of Cassie’s house and he sighed. Part of him
wanted to go inside and fuck her as hard as possible before calling it off, but
that wouldn’t be fair to her, even if it was going to be hard cutting his dick
off cold turkey. He supposed it was time to go back to his magazines and bottle
of lotion. Steeling himself, Dean climbed out of the car and knocked on the
door a few times, before she finally answered, looking way too happy to see
him.
 
“Hey,” she said with a huge smile. “Couldn’t stay away, huh?”
 
Dean gulped and dropped his eyes, feeling ashamed. “Look, Cassie, what we got…
it’s good, but uh, it’s cuttin’ into my time being there for the kids, and so I
gotta… I mean… ya know…”
 
She paused and looked at him as if he’d lost his mind. “Are you serious?” she
asked.
 
“I’m sorry.” Dean glanced up at her shyly. He felt like a schoolboy getting in
trouble for dumping his crush. “I like what we have, I just can’t right now.
Besides…” He glanced around and shrugged. “You deserve someone better than me
anyway.”
 
“You're right,” she snapped coldly, even though there were tears in her eyes.
“I do. I deserve someone who doesn’t just drop me for some bullshit reason. You
know, Dean, if you’d needed help around your house, I wouldn’t have said no.
Get off your high horse and accept someone’s help before the stress kills you.”
 
Dean opened his mouth, but she slammed the door in his face, and he flinched.
Pulling away, Dean walked back to the car and slowly drove back to the house,
unsure of what to do. He knew he needed to kick his ass into gear and find a
new job before the kids realized he was, once again, without an employer. But
he felt lost and tired, all he wanted to do was climb into bed and not get up
ever again.
 
But you can’t, you’ve got kids countin’ on you because their parents quit on
them a long time ago. Someone’s gotta look out of ‘em, and that’syou. So, put
your mouth to good use Winchester.
 
Dean gulped and slowly went inside to make a phone call. His entire life he’d
promised himself he would never lower himself to selling himself, but desperate
times and desperate measures.
 
“This is Crowley,” came the smug British accent.
 
Dean shuddered at the thought of working for Crowley, the biggest fucking pimp
in the city. THe only reason he even knew the bastard was because his father
had ordered his whores all the damn time. “Crowley,” he spat back.
 
“Dean?” Crowley chuckled. “Need some company, boy?”
 
“No,” he said, glad he was alone in the house. “I need a job.”
 
There was a long pause before Crowley finally replied, sounding much too happy
about the prospect, “You know this means late nights.”
 
“Yeah,” he said bitterly. “I know.”
 
“Good. Then meet me at my office tonight at nine. No excuses. If you aren’t
there, consider this conversation null.”
 
“I’ll be there.” He hung up and ran a hand over his face, disappointed with
himself. Crowley paid his whores good money, though, which he supposed would
make it worth it. If he got lucky maybe he’d end up with some of Crowley’s high
rolling clients.
 
You? You? You with a high roller? Ha!! You’re an uneducated loser. No one that
rich will want you in their backseat. They’ll take one look at you, write you
off as having lice and fleas, and then move on. Trust me.
 
Running a hand over his eyes, Dean stood up, and dragged himself upstairs to
take a bath to scrub his entire body until he bled.
 
===============================================================================
 
 
Crowley was smirking as soon as he walked into his “office”, which was nothing
more than his favorite bar. “Ah, Dean Winchester, never thought I’d put you on
my payroll.”
 
Dean didn’t say anything, he just stood still, and hoped he looked decent
enough for someone to pick him out for an evening of fun. “I’m here, so let’s
just do this.”
 
“I have a few clients interested in a young man of your age,” Crowley replied
smartly. “Both men.”
 
He jerked his head up in alarm. “Whoa- what? No, no. I don’t swing that way-.”
 
“It doesn’t matter,” Crowley snapped. “You’ll pleasure them both tonight and
they’ll pay you a pretty penny for your pretty mouth to suck their pretty
cocks, do you understand?”
 
His face began to turn beet red.
 
There had been a few times in his life where he’d considered sleeping with a
man. Once had been when he’d had a huge crush on one of the football players in
one of the many high schools he had frequented as a kid. He’d wanted to wrap
his mouth around that kid’s dick almost as much as he’d wanted to rail the
entire cheerleading squad into the bed, but he’d never acted out the strange
fantasy. The second time had happened when he’d been twenty-one, drunk, and
checking out an older man in a suit. He’d dismissed the thought due to the
alcohol in his system.
 
“You ready?” Crowley asked.
 
Dean shrugged and tried not to spit in Crowley’s face and call the whole deal
off. “Yeah.”
 
“Good.” Crowley gestured at a man at the back of the bar. “That’s your first.
Don’t give them your real name.”
 
“I know.” Dean rolled his eyes before going to walk over, but Crowley snatched
onto his coat. “What?”
 
“Coat off,” Crowley snapped.
 
“Are you-. Fuck.” Dean shrugged out of his leather jacket and pressed it into
Crowley’s hands. “I don’t get this back, I’ll shoot you.” He meant it too.
 
“Yeah, yeah, have fun, Muffin.”
 
Rolling his eyes, Dean took a deep breath, and began to walk over to the table,
feeling completely naked. The jacket was gone and he’d only worn a tight t-
shirt and a pair of jeans. No overshirt, no plaid, nothing that marked him as
Dean Winchester. He’d even mussed up his hair before coming into the bar.
 
The man sitting in a booth was handsome, Dean had to admit that much. He was
older, with gray streaking in his long hair and beard, but he looked healthy.
He was overdressed, in his well cut suit, complete with a kerchief in the
breast pocket. He looked too expensive to be sitting in such a shitty bar, but
he supposed even the rich wanted ass for pay.
 
“Uh, hi,” Dean said awkwardly as he sank down opposite the guy. “I’m Dean- I
mean-.” Fuck, he’d already fucked up.
 
The man smirked a little and sipped on his scotch. “Dean, hm?”
 
“I-...” Dean sighed and shrugged. “Yeah,” he replied, fed up already. “I’m
Dean.”
 
“Cain.”
 
He snorted and then realized the guy was serious. “Cain? Like- seriously?
 Jesus, your parents must have had a sick sense of humor. You got a brother
named Abel too?”
 
“I do,” Cain said with a nod.
 
“Well, fuck, man.” Dean shrugged and went quiet. How did one make small talk
with someone he was going to give head to for cash?
 
“So,” Cain said slowly. “Crowley told me that this is your first night.”
 
“Yeah.”
 
“Good. You haven’t been tainted before by some other man, then.”
 
Dean bristled and glared at the table. “Nope, I haven’t, Sir.”
 
“Mmm, he has manners and good looks, I like that.” Cain finished off his drink
and set the heavy glass on the table lightly. “Let’s go to my car, then.”
 
“Whatever you want. You’re payin’ for it.” Dean shrugged and when Cain stood
up, he did too, following Cain out to a fancy Mercedes. “Nice wheels.”
 
“Thank you.” Cain opened the door and Dean slowly slid in, feeling too poor to
be inside such a nice vehicle. The seats were leather and when Cain turned the
car on, he saw that there was a button to heat the seat up.
 
“Fancy,” he said with a low whistle.
 
“Do you like cars?” Cain asked as they drove away from the bar.
 
Dean gulped, wondering if going somewhere was normal, but he supposed it had
been worked out with Crowley beforehand. They pulled into a crappy motel that
was by the house. Oh yeah, it’d been worked out beforehand. “Uh, yeah, I do,”
he finally said as they got out and began to walk toward a room.
 
Cain opened the door and then gave him a little push inside, making him startle
and feel on the defensive. “Take your clothes off, Dean.”
 
Taking a deep breath, Dean slowly started to strip out of his shirt, jeans,
boxers, and shoes. The tennis shoes were on their last leg and he was glad the
room was mostly dark so Cain didn’t seen how dirty they were, and how there
holes in the bottoms. Dean gulped as Cain circled him and then he walked over
to flip on a dim lamp.
 
“Hmm…” Cain looked him over, his eyebrow raising and making Dean’s skin turn
cold. “You need to be shaved.”
 
“Sh- what?” Dean asked, his voice raising a bit. “Okay, I was told I was gonna
go down on you… what the fuck did you and Crowley agree to?”
 
“I paid for the evening,” Cain replied. “The works.”
 
“The… the works?” Dean gulped and felt his dick shrivel. “Like, ass, mouth, the
whole deal?” When Cain nodded, Dean almost bolted from the room, but then he
remembered why he was doing this. “Right, okay, whatever.”
 
Cain walked up to him and tilted his chin up, craning his neck back a little.
“Don’t worry,” he said with a little smile. “I’ll make sure you enjoy
yourself.”
 
Dean rolled his eyes. “Dude, you’re paying me to enjoy it.”
 
“Then you’re doing an awful job.” Cain began to back him up until Dean felt his
bare skin touch the wall and he jerked. “I prefer my boys shaven.”
 
“Look, I ain’t about to shave my face for you-.”
 
“Not here.” Cain ran a hand over Dean’s jaw. “Here.” His hand trailed down his
body until Cain was cupping his dick and balls in his palm. He gave him a
squeeze and Dean whimpered at the little pain and pleasure it brought him.
 
“You want me to… I mean…” Dean glanced down at the happy trail and mess of
pubic hair he had downstairs. He definitely didn’t groom, but no one had ever
complained in the past. “Really?”
 
“It makes oral sex much more pleasant,” Cain replied. “For both of us.”
 
Dean sighed and glanced at a closed door that must have been the bathroom.
“Look, man, you’re gonna have to just deal tonight, alright? I ain’t about to
let you shave me in some dingy bathroom in a hotel that pays by the hour. That
just sounds like an STD or venereal disease waiting to happen.”
 
Cain looked displeased for a moment but then he pulled back and walked over to
where he had a bag sitting on a chair. “Get on the bed, hands and knees.”
 
Gulping, Dean walked over to obey and do as he was told. God, he hoped the old
man was a quickshot.
 
He waited on the bed for so long that his arms and legs began to ache. Was that
Cain’s game? Was he going to make him wait until he begged Cain to come over
and fuck his ass?
 
“We doin’ this or not?” he asked, unable to bring himself to beg. He wasn’t a
beggar. Never had been, he wasn’t about to start now. There was some movement
and then Dean yelped at the sharp pain striking across his ass. He recognized
the distinct sound of a belt being undone. “Hey-.”
 
“Be quiet, Dean,” Cain said, sounding so commanding, it made him shut up.
 
However, he wasn’t quiet for long.
 
He was soon screaming as Cain spanked his ass in quick succession with the
belt. The pain ran up his spine and down his thighs as the leather struck his
flesh over and over. The backs of his thighs and ass grew hot quickly and he
just knew there would be welts for days. Tears were falling down his face and
he tried to keep the choking sounds back, but this was so damn familiar.
 
John had done the same thing to him his entire life. Beating him with bets,
bottles, and fists.
 
The pain faded a little as Cain came to a dead stop and then he felt gentle
hands run up his back and he was surprised to feel Cain help him sit up on his
knees a little, so they could look at each other.
 
“I’m sorry,” he choked out, trying to wipe his face. “I’m sorry- I’m bein’ a
pussy, I’m sorry. It’s cool, don’t stop- it’s fine-.”
 
“Dean,” Cain said, cupping his face a little. “Do you want to stop?”
 
“N-no. Just keep going, beat me up, it’s fine. I ain’t what you want-.” Dean
shut up when Cain pressed his fingers lightly along his mouth.
 
“Crowley told you nothing, didn’t he?” Cain sighed and sank down on the bed to
sit next to him. “Here, lie down.” He patted his lap and Dean frowned, but then
he was soon lying on his stomach with his head in Cain’s lap. Soothing hands
began to pet and massage his scalp soon after.
 
“He just told me I was gonna blow ya-.”
 
“I told him to explain what you were getting into- I thought your petulant
attitude was due to the play.” Cain sighed heavily. “It is difficult for me to
find someone willing to take on what I enjoy.”
 
“So, you just pay hookers to do it?” Dean asked.
 
“I asked Crowley if this was something you would be comfortable with… Being
punished this way… He said of course, that you would enjoy it.” Cain continued
to pet his head and Dean felt his body relaxing. “I should not have believed
him and I am sorry for hurting you.”
 
Dean gulped and nuzzled Cain’s lap a bit. “Hey, that’s not your fault, man.
Crowley’s a dick… and it’s not you- I just- I got… I mean…” Was it okay for him
to just spill his guts?
 
“Go on,” Cain encouraged him with some more petting. If he could have purred,
he would have.
 
“My dad used to beat me,” he whispered, staring off out the window which was
mostly covered with gross curtains. “It was the belt, that really… I mean- he
used to take his off and beat the hell outta me with it.”
 
“I didn’t know,” Cain muttered, sounding truly torn that he’d hurt Dean. “I
would not have done it if I’d known.”
 
“Hey, it’s cool man…. There anything else I can do? For ya?” Slowly, he began
to sit up, wincing at the pain in his backside. “I mean, I’ve never… blown a
guy before, but I know how it feels, so…” He shrugged once.
 
Cain smirked a little and gestured for Dean to go ahead. Blushing, Dean ducked
back down close to Cain’s lap and began to undo the man’s fly, blushing at the
dark curls along Cain’s base. He was well groomed and trimmed, which was oddly
arousing and making Dean’s cock stir. He also smelled nice, which was better
than some men, Dean was certain.
 
Gulping once, he took Cain’s cock in hand and finally dared to dart his tongue
out to lick the head. He was uncut, which was only hotter in Dean’s mind. He’d
always wished his dick hadn’t been circumcised, but his parents had gone ahead
and let it happen. Sam had lucked out on that one-
 
Dude, don’t think about your brother while you suck a dude’s dick.
 
Clearing his throat a little, he opened his mouth and went ahead and tried to
take as much in as possible, which resulted on him choking instead. The
coughing came after and he had to sit up, looking embarrassed. Great, this
night was going to go so well, Cain would get his money back and Crowley would
probably let some bigger guy rape him without lube.
 
“It’s alright,” Cain said, going back to petting the back of his head. “Slower,
don’t worry about taking everything in at once. This isn’t a pornographic
movie.”
 
Dean blushed, nodded, and went back down, this time only taking Cain’s head
into his mouth. Giving an experimental suck, Dean let his mouth get wet and he
sucked and drooled down Cain’s dick, to slick him up, so his hands could do the
rest. He was clumsy and he almost bit Cain more than once, but eventually, Cain
groaned and told him he was going to come, so Dean yanked back and ended up
with a faceful of jizz instead.
 
Cain chuckled and told him he was a good boy.
 
That sent real shivers down his spine and a throb in his dick.
 
“Shit,” he whispered, feeling his face heat up.
 
“Did you like that, hm?” Cain asked, petting him some more.
 
“Uh- yeah- I guess I did…” He blushed some more and sat up, realizing his face
was covered in cum. “Can I go clean up?”
 
“Yes, hurry back.” Cain gave him a light push and Dean hurried to wash up in
the bathroom, glancing down at his cock, which was at attention and throbbing.
The good boy comment had left him needy and wanting. It was just so dirty.
 
When he came back, Cain was shrugging out of his jacket and Dean licked his
lips hungrily. Okay, so maybe he had a thing for older men.
 
“Does the good boy want a reward?” Cain asked lightly, sounding so casual, as
if they were talking about the weather. Dean found himself nodding. “Then lay
down on your stomach and behave.”
 
Ducking past Cain, Dean stretched out on the bed, trying to spread his legs,
but then Cain was doing it for him and he felt the beard rub against the back
of his thighs, which were still sore, but now he tingled with anticipation.
Cain’s lips brushed against his hole and then he kissed it.
 
“Fuck-.” Dean gulped and he shut up, unsure of he was allowed to speak.
“Sorry…”
 
“Shhh.” Cain chided lightly, his tongue darting to lick against Dean’s rim.
 
He whined.
 
Whined. Like a cat in heat. When Cain’s tongue sped up, Dean was moaning into
the pillow and trying not to rut against the sheets. He’d seen a rimming video
once, when he’d delved a little too deep into a porn website. He’d jerked it
off so hard that night, his vision had almost gone white when he’d finished.
 
Now, he was getting the real thing and Cain knew exactly what he was doing.
 
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he started to pant, unable to help it. “Fuck!”
 
Cain chuckled and kissed his rim again. “Say it, Dean,” he muttered, biting his
ass lightly. “Say Daddy.”
 
Dean whimpered and realizing his cock was dribbling precome on the bed and
smearing along his stomach. He’d felt that desire since the moment Cain had
called him good boy, but he’d felt weird about it.
 
“Say it,” Cain repeated, his voice lower, back to that commanding tone.
 
“Daddy,” he panted. “Daddy, Daddy.”
 
“Yes, good.” Cain spanked his ass once, but it was light and his palm was soon
to rub the pain away. “Such a good little boy you are.”
 
He whined again, louder this time, breathing hard as Cain returned to licking
and giving him serious beard burn. “Daddy,” he whimpered, his toes curling
dangerously. “Daddy, I’m gonna make a mess.”
 
Cain growled and shoved his tongue in. Dean cried out and came, making the
promised mess on the sheets and his stomach. When Cain pulled away, he was left
feeling empty and he could feel his hole clenching and unclenching, desperate
for something else to fill him.
 
“Daddy,” he repeated, feeling exhausted and ready to sleep.
 
“Are you tired?” Cain asked, his hands rubbing his back now. He nodded
sleepily. “May Daddy fuck you anyway?”
 
“Mhm.” Dean nodded and then he felt Cain’s cock rub against his hole, which was
wet and sloppy. He gasped when Cain began to press in; it was big and there was
some pain in the stretch, but Dean figured he deserved that much. He wasn’t
what Cain wanted after all.
 
Cain groaned a little as he started to thrust healthily into Dean, ramming
harder and harder, until the entire bed began to knock against the wall. Dean
panted and stared at the clock, which told him it was almost ten. The kids were
hopefully in bed, but he couldn’t be sure. He’d left them alone with a hurried
apology, playing it off like he was picking up extra shifts at work to help pay
the bills.
 
Some tears leaked out of Dean’s eyes as he finally realized he was a hooker.
 
Cain was fucking him hard and fast because he was a hooker.
 
A prostitute.
 
Someone who gained money from sex.
 
He could go to jail if caught. If he went to jail, the kids would be put into
shitty foster homes. Dean gulped and moaned a little when Cain cried out loudly
and slammed him once. He must have came.
 
“What a good little boy,” Cain praised, rubbing his back. “Leaving Daddy very
satisfied.”
 
Dean hoped the tears weren’t visible. “You’re welcome, Daddy,” he whispered,
his mind already wondering what the next guy would be like.
 
===============================================================================
 
Five in the morning and he was finally allowed to go home, with a measly one
hundred dollars. Crowley had kept most of it, since it was his first night and
he wanted Dean to keep coming back for more. The second man had been horribly
unpleasant; he’d tasted bad in his mouth, had smelled worse, and had
essentially bent him over in an alley and fucked him raw, until Dean was sore
and feeling sloppy, open, and dripping with jizz.
 
He definitely needed a shower.
 
Limping up to the door, Dean slowly let himself inside, and up the stairs to
wash off so the kids didn’t smell the sex stink all over him. His ass and
thighs were still horribly sore where Cain had spanked him raw.
 
Cain.
 
Dean sighed as he thought on the handsome stranger.
 
After they’d finished, Cain had went outside and bought him a soda and some
snacks from the vending machine, promising to come back to see him. He only
half believed it, but Dean had appreciated the kindness in Cain’s hands and the
way he’d made him come.
 
God, he hadn’t had an orgasm like that in years.
 
The water was tepid at best, but at least he was clean, and he no longer
smelled like sweat, cum, and whatever else the second guy had ranked of.
Letting himself into his room, Dean pulled on some sweat pants and a shirt,
before glancing at his bed with serious longing. He was exhausted - sex work
was a lot harder than he’d first envisioned and his entire body was sore. But
he couldn’t sleep, not yet, he had to make breakfast for the kids.
 
Making his way down the stairs, Dean still felt a leak in his ass. “Jesus,” he
hissed, glad he’d thrown on a clean pair of boxers. Apparently, he was going to
be cleaning up for days. Sighing, Dean dug around for some eggs and began to
fill the toaster with bread to make toast. At least he had one hundred dollars
to spend at the grocery store, which would go nicely if he stretched the dollar
a bit.
 
By six, there were sounds upstairs, and then by six-thirty there was arguing.
Dean sighed as he stared at the food he’d made. Another day, same old, same
old.
 
“Just one day,” he whispered to himself as he turned to greet Sam with a smile.
“Morning, Sammy, ready for breakfast?”
 
 
***** Chapter 2 *****
“Hey, ready to cut class?” came Alex’s voice right in her ear.
 
Claire smirked and spun around as Alex pressed her hips until she had Claire
pinned to the row of lockers. “You know I am,” she replied with a smile, their
lips almost touching. It was always almost, never quite there. “You gonna kiss
me or not, Alex?”
 
Alex pulled away and shook her long, dark tresses back. “C’mon, I got something
better than a smoke for you.”
 
Claire frowned as Alex linked arms with her and they walked down the hall
together. The two girls owned Riverdale High School and everyone they passed
knew it, including the staff. Alex winked at the chemistry teacher before they
broke into a laughing fit and ran down a stairwell and out one of the back exit
doors. Soon, they were enveloped in warm air and Alex grabbed Claire’s hand,
pulling her toward the bleachers, where they usually cut class.
 
Claire’s hands were sweating and she was really hoping Alex didn’t notice.  
 
They were always almost and it was driving her insane. More than anything she
wanted Alex to ask her out, but she knew Alex never would. Alex was a… free
spirit. She didn’t like to tie herself down to one person at a time. She liked
to hook up, but she didn’t go on dates.
 
It was a pipe dream and nothing more, but that didn’t keep Claire from wanting.
 
When they reached the bleachers, the gang was already there, and Claire soon
found herself sandwiched between Alex and one of the seniors she didn’t know
that well on a blanket.
 
“You got the stuff?” he asked, his voice deep and rumbly. Claire shuddered at
the sound; deep voices always managed to make her wet.
 
“I told you I did,” Alex snapped back, clearly annoyed as she pulled a bag out
of her purse. Claire didn’t need to ask to know it was coke. “You ready,
gentleman?”
 
The guys’ grinned wide and began to fight over it, but Alex was soon snatching
the bag back. “Hey,” she said, “this shit ain’t cheap. You know how much I had
to steal to get this kind of cash?”
 
Claire shifted slightly, feeling extremely uncomfortable. Sure, she smoked and
she drank at parties, but when it came down to it, she wasn’t a bad-bad girl.
She just liked to act the part, not walk the walk. The only reason she had even
started to change her hair, clothes, and attitude was because her father had
walked out and her mother had had a mental break. It wasn’t as if she wanted to
get high on school property.
 
But if she left, then Alex wouldn’t think she was that cool anymore, or at
least, that was what she assumed. If Alex ditched her, then she’d fall back to
the bottom of the social ladder, collecting broken bones along the way. She
took a deep breath and decided to just suck it up. It wasn’t that big of a deal
anyway.
 
“You ready, Claire?” Alex asked as she dished some out on the back of each of
their hands to snort.
 
Claire nodded a little. “Uh, yeah.”
 
“Bet you do this shit all the time in your parts, right?” Alex laughed with a
wink. “Trust me, I know what a shithole that side of town is. I’m just glad
Jody makes enough money to live on the East side and not the West.”
 
“Right,” Claire muttered before raising her hand to her nose and sniffing in as
deeply as she could. The rush was immediate, it made her head spin and her eyes
grew wide at the new sensation. “Fuck.”
 
The guys were laughing and getting up to dick around while Alex fell back on
the blanket with a huge smile on her face. Claire dared to lay down beside her
on her side, staring down into Alex’s gorgeous face. Sometimes, Claire felt as
if she were staring into the sun.
 
“You like it?” Alex asked as her smile widened. “It’s worth a few more
hits,believeme… but I bet this is your first.”
 
“You just said…” Claire said, a frown on her face.
 
“Yeah, well, I didn’t want the guys to think you were pussy.” Alex rolled her
eyes and laughed. “Let’s dance, Claire.”
 
“To what?” Claire asked with a laugh, but then Alex grabbed her arm and hauled
her up and started to move like music was playing. For a moment, she only stood
there, unsure of what to do, but then Alex began to grind back on her. Claire
felt her heart race a little faster and she wasn’t sure if it were the drugs or
the rush of having Alex press up against her body.
 
“Get it, Alex!” Aidan called with a loud whoop. “Oh, here comes Chambers.”
 
“Krissy!” Alex cried as she rushed over to attack their other friend.
 
Krissy laughed and let Alex grab onto her and then Claire felt her stomach
drop. Alex grabbed Krissy’s face and kissed her. The boys began to scream and
holler as if they were witnessing a miracle. Claire could only stand there,
completely stunned and feeling her high come to an immediate halt. It only grew
worse when Krissy kissed her back.
 
Claire glared down at the ground and her shoes before storming back toward the
school. The world was all a rush and she had so much energy, she was soon
breaking into a run. Instead of running back into the building, she ran around
it and toward the front drive. If she had to, she’d run all the way home, just
to escape what she’d just seen.
 
It wasn’t until she reached the porch that she realized there were tears
streaming down her face.
 
===============================================================================
 
“And that’s it, time’s up. Put your pencils down and turn your tests in.”
 
Sam sighed as he set his whittled pencil down on his desk, glaring at the
English test he was certain he’d flunked.
 
“How’d you do, cowboy?” Ruby asked, her hip out, looking overly sultry in her
skinny jeans and low cut shirt. Not that he was looking or anything.
 
“I flunked,” he replied as he stood and went to set the test down on Mrs.
Milton’s desk. Anna, Mrs. Milton’s daughter, was one of Ruby’s best friends.
Sam was fairly certain Anna had a crush on Ruby, but he was usually wrong about
those types of things.
 
“Yeah, right,” Ruby replied as she rolled her eyes. “You totally aced it, we
all know it.”
 
Sam didn’t reply because something caught his eye by the window. Frowning, he
doubled back and walked over to try and look through the partially opened
blinds. His eyes widened when he realized it was Claire and she was running
through the parking lot.
 
“What the fuck…” he whispered.
 
“Hey, you comin’, Stretch?” Ruby called.
 
“Uh, yeah…” Sam trailed off as he spun around and began to hurry out of the
classroom and down the hall to their next class, which happened to be lunch.
 
“You okay? You look lost…” Ruby tilted her head to the side, sounding actually
worried for once. “Sam?”
 
“It was Claire, she was running through the parking lot. I gotta call Dean.
Sorry, Ruby, I’ll meet you at lunch.” Sam stuffed his stuff into his bag and
began to run down the hall, even though he hated breaking rules, and this was
definitely him breaking the rules.
 
“Sam?!”
 
He had to ignore her as he bolted for the main office coming to a skidding halt
in front of the secretary’s desk. She knew him well, since he always came down
to the office to say hello. Now that he was in a steady place and at a school
for good, he liked getting to know the people who ran the school. Maybe it was
for times like these, when he was going to have to beg to use the phone.
 
“Oh, hello Sam,” she said with a huge smile. All the students called her Miss.
Charlotte.
 
“Hi,” Sam said with a huge smile. “Uh, I gotta favor to ask…”
 
“What?” she asked.
 
“I need to call my brother? It’s an emergency- it’s with my sister.” Sam didn’t
want to rat Claire out, but he was also going to have to get into her locker to
get her stuff before school was out.
 
Miss. Charlotte looked at him skeptically but he just kept on smiling and
looking innocent, until she nodded and gestured at the phone behind her. “Just
dial three first, Sweetheart.”
 
“Thanks, Miss. Charlotte.” Sam smiled and rushed over to pick up the phone,
dial three, and then dial their house phone. “C’mon, Dean, pick up- pick up…”
 
“Yeah?” came Dean’s tired voice.
 
“Dean! I just saw Claire, she was running away from the school,” he whispered.
“I don't know what’s wrong, but-.”
 
“Fuck,” Dean groaned, sounding more alert. “Alright, I’ll keep an eye out.
Jesus fuck me, fucking- ugh.”
 
The line went dead and Sam sighed as he hung up, too. “Thanks, Miss.
Charlotte,” he called with a wave as he turned and headed toward the cafeteria
to meet Ruby. His lunch was sandwiched in his bookbag, probably ruined at this
rate. Maybe Ruby would take pity on him and buy him lunch again.
 
“Hey, there you are,” Ruby said as he sat down at their usual table. “Peanut
butter on bread again?” she asked, already passing him a tray. He could have
kissed her if that wouldn’t have been really weird.
 
“Thanks, Ruby,” he said, picking up the chicken sandwich to devour. Sure, it
was crap, but it was better than what he had.
 
“Everything okay?” She dipped one of her french fries in ketchup, which was her
favorite food. She liked french fries, ketchup, and tall men.
 
“Yeah, it was just… I saw Claire running away from the school, so I called Dean
to keep an eye out. I have no idea what that was about.” He shrugged
helplessly.
 
“Weird, hope she’s okay.”
 
“Yeah, me too.” Sam sighed and then Anna was sitting with them, looking extra
preppy in her plaid skirt, pink sweater, and her hair up in a ponytail. “You
look nice today.”
 
“Oh, thanks Sam,” Anna said with a smile, even as she glanced at Ruby for
confirmation.
 
Ruby nodded. “Yeah, I like it, the hot librarian look.”
 
That made Anna blush and Sam smirked a little. It was so obvious to him, but
Ruby was clueless.
 
“So, tonight there’s a party on Baker Street, who’s going?” Ruby asked.
 
“I am if you are,” Anna said.
 
“Really? You? Miss Perfect Grades?” Ruby laughed and slung an arm around Anna’s
shoulders. Sam was fairly certain Anna would have stroked out if she wasn’t
just frozen with wide eyes at their closeness. “Sweet. You coming, Sammy?”
 
Sam glared. “Ruby…”
 
“Sam. Sorry. Jeeze, so touchy.”
 
He shrugged and glanced down at his food. If Dean had to work that would put
him in charge again, even if he was tired of being in charge. It was tiring,
even though Claire and Adam could take care of themselves, Jesse was another
matter.
 
“Sam? You coming or not?” Ruby asked.
 
Sam looked up at her finally. “Yeah,” he said. “I am.”
 
“Awesome.” They all exchanged smiles and Sam realized what freedom felt like.
It was nice.
 
===============================================================================
 
Dean made his way downstairs, even if all he wanted to do was sleep, just in
time for Claire to burst through the front door in tears. “Claire? Hey- hey-.”
Dean finished walking down the steps to go to her, ready to wrap his arms
around her, but she pushed him away. “Claire, what the hell is going on?”
 
“She kissed Krissy, right in front of me!” Claire sobbed.
 
“Who kissed Krissy?” Dean asked as she started to pace.
 
“Alex! Who else?!” Claire yelled as she continued to pace around the living
room, clearly distraught. She seemed agitated and kept twitching and she
couldn’t stop even for a moment.
 
“Claire, c’mon, let’s sit down and talk,” Dean insisted, reaching for her, but
she spun around and smacked his hand away.
 
“Don’t touch me! Don’t you fucking touch me!” She glared and then Dean frowned
as he realized her pupils were extremely dilated.
 
“Are you… high?” he asked, completely stunned. “Fuck- Claire, what did you
take?”
 
“Nothing!”
 
“Well, that’s clearly a lie, what did you take?” He was doing his best to not
be angry, since every kid experimented with drugs. God knows he did. “Claire,
please, I’m not mad, just tell me.”
 
“I dunno, it looked like coke.” Claire shrugged and then hugged herself. “Fuck,
she kissed Krissy. I like her and she kissed Krissy! I hate her!”
 
“Coke? Jesus, Claire!” Dean threw up his hands and ran them through his hair.
“C’mon, let’s go.”
 
“Go where?”
 
“The ER.”
 
“Why?” She backed up away from him until she was pressed into a corner.
 
“Because I need you to be looked over for my own peace of mind,” Dean replied.
“Maybe they can give you something.”
 
“You wanna be a arrested, genius?” she demanded. “They’ll just assume you gave
the shit to me.”
 
His shoulders slumped as he realized she was probably right. “Son of a bitch,”
he groaned and then pointed to the couch. “Sit on your ass and don’t leave the
house. Got it?”
 
“But-.”
 
“Now.” Dean went to the kitchen to get her some water and then the phone was
ringing. “Jesus!” he screamed, angrily answering, “What?!”
 
“Mmm, temper, temper,” came Crowley’s smug voice. “Did I call at a bad time,
Cupcake?”
 
“What do you want Crowley?” he asked, completely exasperated.
 
“Cain is asking for you again. The whole night, he’s paying double for you to
show up fresh, showered, and ready to spend the whole evening at his
apartment.”
 
Dean glanced back into the living room to make sure Claire was still there and
also to make sure she wasn’t paying attention. He quickly lowered his voice to
hiss, “Whatever, what time?”
 
“He’ll pick you up at the same bar at ten tonight. You won’t be returning to
your house until tomorrow.”
 
“Fine. I gotta go, I’m having a kid emergency.” Hanging up, Dean pressed his
forehead to the cabinets before taking a deep breath and filling a mostly clean
glass with ice and water. “Claire, drink this, please,” he said as he came back
to the living room to sit beside her.
 
“Are you really not mad?” she asked.
 
“I mean, I am mad,” he replied slowly, “I don’t want you doing drugs that hard
ever again, got it?”
 
“Yeah… I don’t want to either, don’t worry. I don’t feel good…” She trailed off
and took the water to sip. “Fuck.”
 
“Claire, I’d feel better if I took you to the ER.”
 
“I’m fine,” she snapped, getting up to head upstairs. “I’m gonna sleep it off.”
 
“Alright, but don’t yell at me when I’m checking on you every twenty minutes.”
 
“Whatever.”
 
Dean sighed and sank down on the couch, feeling completely drained. He was
sleep deprived, hungry, and he’d forgotten to buy himself a coffee as a treat
when he’d been out buying groceries earlier. At least they had food now; he
could make the kids lunches and dinner before he had to rush off to work in the
evening.
 
He turned his eyes to look at the clock. It was almost time for the kids to
come home, which meant he needed to get up and start making snacks and then
plan dinner. Tonight, they were having tacos, which was a huge treat, and it
made him smile when he thought about it. Pushing the exhaustion to the side,
Dean stood up and made his way back to the kitchen to start making some bagel
bites in the oven.
 
It was going to be a longnight.
 
===============================================================================
 
Cain picked him up exactly at ten; the guy had extreme punctuality, he was
learning quickly.
 
Once again, he’d forgone the layers and picked a pair of jeans, which he’d
washed that day and a more fitted t-shirt, not that he had a lot of those. He
was big on baggy shirts and  baggier jeans. They hid his fat.
 
“You look nice,” Cain commented as he began to drive into the heart of the city
and away from the suburbs. Dean watched as the familiar sights of his small
section of town began to fade away and give into something nicer, cleaner,
richer. It was obvious that Cain had money, but Dean had never imagined himself
being picked by such a well off john.
 
“Thanks,” he replied as he looked out the window and watched the buildings grow
taller and there were many people out and about. That didn’t happen on the West
side. If you walked alone at night on the West side, there was a huge chance
you would be mugged and shot. Dean never let the kids leave the house past
eleven unattended.
 
Of course, speaking of, Sam was going to a fucking party, even though he’d told
him no. He’d told Sam to stay, but Sam had taken off, which had put Adam in
charge, but really, Claire was in charge, because Adam didn’t give a fuck about
anyone but himself. But he’d also made Sam promise him before he’d left to not
walk home and to have someone sober drive him. He just hope Sam kept his
promise.
 
“Seems nice here,” Dean commented as Cain began to pull up to an extremely tall
and nice building. It had to be his apartment complex. “Wow, you live here?”
 
Cain chuckled. “I own the building,” he replied as he slid out of the car.
 
“You- you what?” Dean clambered out of the car to stare at Cain as if he’d
grown two heads. “You own the building?” His eyes trailed up and up and up.
“Holy shit.”
 
“I own many buildings in this area, actually.” Cain handed his keys to a valet
driver who nodded and then Cain’s arm was around his waist and walking him up
to the doorman.
 
“No shit,” Dean muttered as they were let inside. “How rich are you?”
 
Cain smirked and they walked up to the elevator and he pressed the up arrow.
“Rich enough to own an apartment building,” he replied with a wink.
 
Dean rolled his eyes but didn’t say anything as they stepped into the doors. As
soon as they shut, Dean gasped when Cain pressed him up against the wall and
their mouths sealed together in a hot and deep kiss. Suddenly, Dean felt as if
he were in a movie and this was the moment the two main love interests were
gonna do it.
 
It was invigorating.
 
“Fuck,” Dean gasped as Cain rucked up his shirt and kissed his neck. “So, the
whole night?”
 
“Oh, yes,” Cain replied against his skin, moving to kiss his lips again. “I had
you once and I couldn’t say no again.”
 
Dean groaned and allowed Cain to squeeze his crotch, making him half hard
easily. “I showered like you wanted.”
 
“I can tell.” Cain pushed his shirt so far up, Dean could see his skin tone
reflecting in the stainless steel walls of the elevator. He moaned when Cain
rubbed his nipples and made them hard. “You smell divine.”
 
He rolled his eyes a little - he smelled like the cheap Irish Spring bars of
soap, nothing fancy. “Believe me, I don’t smell divine-.” The comment was cut
off with a little yelp when Cain pinched his nipple too hard. “Ow, dude.”
 
“No bad talking yourself around me, young man,” Cain replied, his voice so
stern it made Dean’s body shudder.
 
“Yes, Sir,” he muttered just as the elevator dinged and the doors opened to
reveal a long hallway with one solitary door at the end. “You live in the
penthouse?” he whispered.
 
“It comes with owning the building.” Cain smiled a little and then began to
steer Dean down the hall in a hurry. Dean waited as Cain opened the door and he
didn’t even get a good look around before Cain was bending him over the nearest
object, which happened to be a couch.
 
“Needy today, Daddy?” Dean asked, teasing slightly.
 
“Had a long day,” Cain replied as he yanked down Dean’s pants and underwear to
reveal his ass. He sighed, as if disappointed, and Dean blushed. What was wrong
now? “Undress and go upstairs. Lie on the bed.”
 
“Yes, Sir,” Dean said again as he straightened and started to strip out of his
clothes right there. He could feel Cain’s eyes on him, which was making him a
little uncomfortable, but soon he was turning to go up the stairs and find the
bedroom. It wasn’t hard to find, even though there were two other rooms he
realized, but Cain’s was very distinct; it also looked the most lived in.
 
The bed was made, just like the others, but it wasn’t perfect, there were
slippers by the bed, and glasses on the nightstand. Dean smirked as he picked
up the black rimmed frames and set them on his nose. God, Cain was blind.
 
“Damn,” he whispered as he plucked the glasses off of his face and set them
back down and then he was lying on the bed, on his stomach, unsure of what else
to do other than wait.
 
Cain took his time, too.
 
Honestly, he took so long, Dean almost fell asleep, but then he was awake as
Cain walked in. It was hard to sleep when he felt the stern eyes trailing and
raking over his skin. If he hadn’t already been undressed, he would have
assumed Cain was undressing him with his eyes.
 
“You like?” Dean asked playfully, even kicking up his feet a little. Did Cain
like it when he was cheeky and cute? God, he hoped so.
 
“I do,” Cain admitted before turning to go into another room, which Dean peered
over enough to see it was the bathroom.
 
Oh God, I hope he’s not into that bathroom play stuff- that’s justtookinky for
me.
 
When Cain returned, Dean saw he had a towel draped over one arm, a dish of
water in one hand, and a razor in the other. It finally clicked. “Uh…” Dean
started. “Look, I get it, you want me… baby smooth or whatever, but-.”
 
“Lie on your back, Dean,” Cain replied.
 
Dean sighed as he rolled over and allowed Cain to place the towel under his
hips, so he had something beneath his butt. “You’re not real used to hearin’
the word no, are you?”
 
“On the contrary,” Cain replied, “I hear the word no, very often.”
 
He pouted and glared at the ceiling, his arms crossed over his chest. “Do I
have to do this? Will you combust if I have a happy trail? Look, I like it,
makes me feel manly… You can groom it up if you want, but I’m not a
prepubescent boy, alright? I like the hair down there.”
 
Cain rubbed his hips and spread his legs, which only made him blush harder. “If
you do not want me to-.”
 
“I don’t.” Dean looked down at him where Cain was standing at the edge of the
bed. “Really, I do not want.”
 
Cain sighed and disappeared back in the bathroom again. Dean relaxed and stared
up at the ceiling, just waiting now. Would Cain want to spank him again? He was
fairly certain he could handle it this time, now that he knew about it.
 
“I don’t wish to make you uncomfortable,” Cain said as he returned. “Do you
know about safewording, Dean?”
 
“Uh, nope.. I mean- we got a swear jar at home, but it’s empty because I keep
taking the damn money outta it.” He shrugged. “Plus, I can’t stop saying fuck
for five minutes, so I stopped caring as much.”
 
Cain stared at him a moment, clearly trying to catch up, but eventually Dean
saw a light go off. “Ah, that is not quite what I mean.”
 
“What do you mean then?” Dean slowly sat up, wondering if this were a Very
Serious Conversation™.
 
“Safewording, is for when you wish for us to stop… for any reason. If you’re in
pain, if you don’t like what we’re doing, if I’ve emotionally or mentally upset
you, as I did the other night,” Cain explained. “I can also safeword, even
though I am the dominant in the bedroom.”
 
“The- the-... Oh.” It finally clicked with Dean, too.
 
Cain was into BDSM.
 
He knew a little about BDSM, because Sam had gone on a huge ass tirade about
why 50 Shades was nothing but bullshit wrapped up to look like BDSM. He’d read
about subs and dominants and how they were nothing at all like the book went on
about.
Did Cain see him as a sub? Was he a sub?
 
Dean began to think back to all of his sexual experiences and realized that,
yeah, he probably was a fucking sub.
 
Then, he finally remembered safewording. He’d read about that too.
 
“Oh,” he said, finally tracking. “Like if I shout out Red Light, or whatever.”
 
Cain’s eyebrows went up. “You know about this lifestyle.”
 
“A little,” he admitted. “I mean, I’m no expert, but my brother got real into
50 Shades- not like… not like into it, but against it. He hated the whole
series and would go on rants about why it was crap, so I started to read up on
it.” Dean shrugged and felt his cheeks start to turn red. “So, yeah, I know
what safewording is.”
 
“Do you have one?” Cain asked.
 
“Nah, but I can make one up if you like.” He looked up at Cain shyly. “Probably
Impala, it’s my go to.”
 
“Impala it is,” Cain replied as he touched Dean’s chin playfully. “I am glad
you agreed to stay the night.”
 
Well,he wanted to say, you are paying me to do it.But, he also didn’t want to
remind Cain of their unfair dynamic, so he just said, “Well, it’s nice to get
outta the house for a night, i gotta admit… and your bed is nice.”
 
The whole room was nice, really. It was all dark shades of gray and mauve and
neutral colors with a hint of purple here and there. Classy, modern, and chic.
Dean wasn’t surprised, Cain seemed like a super classy guy.
 
“Thank you.” Cain’s hand slowly began to guide him back onto the bed and Dean
let him, smiling as his back came to connect with the soft mattress. He watched
as Cain’s fingers walked down his chest, to his belly, which was softer than he
wanted, and then to run two fingers down his cock to the head, where it started
to twitch and stand up.
 
Dean’s breath hitched as Cain wrapped his fingers around Dean’s cock to slowly
start to stroke and tease him. His eyes slowly fluttered closed as the pleasure
started to build - it was slow and steady, just a little warmth in his belly
and pressure in his pelvis. It felt good, almost like a tickle, and Dean knew
he’d need a little extra to get off in Cain’s hand. More than the slow and
steady movements at least.
 
There was no lube, which made it a little uncomfortable, but he let his eyes
open a little to look at Cain, who was watching him with intensity. It made
goose bumps appear on Dean’s skin and his nipples hardened.
 
“You wanna slick up the ride, old man?” Dean asked with a wink.
 
Cain paused and immediately turned to rummage through a drawer to remove a
bottle of lube. Pouring a generous amount into his palm, Cain was quick to
return to the slow and light handjob. Dean sighed and moaned at the new
sensation, pressing his hips up eagerly into Cain’s palm.
 
“Oh, yeah, fuck,” Dean growled, his eyes fluttering.
 
“Do you like that?” Cain asked as his hand slowly sped up. The slick sounds
were all Dean could focus on, so he just nodded, gripping and twisting the
sheets in his hands as he grew closer and closer to orgasm. “Such a good boy,
you are,” Cain muttered and Dean whined. .
 
Apparently, praise was a serious hot spot for him. It was definitely pressing
all of his buttons at once. “Daddy,” he whimpered pathetically, breathless and
close to coming. “I’m about to blow-.”
 
“Hold it,” Cain said firmly.
 
Dean gulped and felt his toes curl tightly. “Daddy, I c-can’t…” He gasped and
cried out as he came hard, splattering his stomach and chest. “I’m sorry-.”
 
Cain worked him through it until it was too much and then he was leaning down
to press a kiss to his forehead. It was such a subtle, gentle gesture. It made
Dean’s chest feel warm and fuzzy. “Good boy,” he whispered. “You did well.”
 
Dean blushed and nodded once. It was then he realized he was exhausted. If Cain
wanted to fuck him, it would have to be in his sleep. Struggling to keep his
eyes open, Dean soon realized he was dozing off, and Cain wasn’t even
complaining. One moment he was awake, the next he was being washed with a warm
cloth, then he was asleep, then he was waking up when Cain was tucking him, and
then finally, he rolled over and felt himself practically trip into sleep for
good.
 
 
***** Chapter 3 *****
Chapter Notes
     Bad BDSM up ahead, this is not how real healthy BDSM relationships
     should/would go, fyi
Parties were not his scene; they were too loud, the music was always something
awful, and there were always girls everywhere trying to climb down the front of
his pants. Why he had agreed to go with Ruby and Anna in the first place was
beyond his imagination, but he had, and he was there, so now he had to suck it
up. The only thing he knew to do was to stand in the corner, hold his red cup
full of mystery alcohol, and bob his head now and again to the shitty music.
 
He would rather listen to Dean sing along to Led Zeppelin’s Houses of the
Holyten times in a row than stand and listen to whatever was playing now.
 
“Hey, Sam,” Ruby said as she walked up to him. She’d changed for the party,
curling her hair and putting on the shortest dress he’d ever seen on a real
girl in person. “You wanna go upstairs?”
 
“Uh…” Sam glanced around the party and immediately felt trapped. He could say
no and blow Ruby off, which would only upset her, or he could go upstairs and
pretend to like something he didn’t really feel the desire to do. The second
seemed like the better of the two. “Sure.”
 
“Great.” Ruby took his hand and together they made their way upstairs and for a
moment Sam wondered where Anna had gotten to.
 
“Where’s Anna?” he asked as soon as they were in a room, which Sam knew
belonged to someone that wasn’t him. It wasn’t an overly nice house, but they
weren’t in the same impoverished neighborhood he lived in now.
 
“Oh, I don’t know,” Ruby said with a flippant shrug. “I’m more interested in
you, anyway.” She turned to face him and then her hands were in his shirt and
she was pulling him in for a sloppy kiss, that made him drop the cup in hand.
It fell to the floor, splattering all over the carpet and Sam immediately felt
awful for probably staining this person’s carpet.
 
“Ruby,” he said, pulling back, trying to break free, but she was pushing and
pulling him to the bed. Before he could even protest, she had him on his back
and she was straddling him as if she were about to ride him like a fucking
pony. Sam’s eyes grew wide in alarm.
 
“Sam Winchester, I have been dying to sleep with you for way too long,” she
said as she pulled her dress down to reveal her breasts. The sight made Sam
blush and he immediately looked away. He’d seen breasts on TV but never in
person and this was not how he imagined it would go the first time.
 
“Ruby, you’re drunk,” he said quickly, hoping that would put her off. “I can’t-
we can’t.”
 
“Aw, c’mon Sam, I know it’s what you want.”
 
But it wasn’t what he wanted.
 
He had never wanted it. Sex. The big S word. Doing the do. Fucking. Making
love.
 
For a long time he’d grown up believing he was broken and that there was
something wrong with him. The first time he’d seen porn, he’d felt
uncomfortable - it had left him feeling dirty and wrong. Afterward, he’d
realize the idea of sex repulsed him. He didn’t even masturbate all that often,
only when the stress became too much and he just had to.
 
Over time, he’d started to research more about how he lacked sexual attraction
to people and come across the term asexual. As a preteen he’d felt dirty and
weird for not wanting sex, but after he’d learned more and more about
asexuality via the computers at the library and the lone laptop he had at home
that sometimes connected to the wifi, the more he’d felt at home and felt
peace.
 
He wasn’t strange. He wasn’t wrong and he wasn’t weird. He was normal and there
were other people like him. The only problem came when he tried to explain it
to people; the only person who knew was Adam, because they shared a room and
things just came out between them sometimes. He hadn’t even told Dean, because
he was certain Dean would neverunderstand.
 
But now he had to get Ruby to understand or he was going to have to suck it up.
Again.
 
“Ruby, we have to talk,” he said, pressing her back a little, hoping he didn’t
offend her.
 
“About what?” she asked with a smile.
 
“About this…” He gestured between them. “Look, I like you and I think you’re
very beautiful, but I don’t want to… you know…”
 
Ruby blinked, sitting up and climbing off of him as if he’d stung her. “You
don’t want to have sex?” she asked with surprise. “Seriously?”
 
“Yeah, seriously. I’m sorry, Ruby, I’m just not ready,” he lied, hoping that
would be a good enough excuse. “Okay?”
 
“Wow, I’m surprised, like really surprised. I’m not used to hearing no.” She
looked around them, seeming lost and confused. “Okay, fine, you don’t want me,
fine. You know, Sam, you could have been nicer about it.”
 
“What?” Sam asked, trying to sit up as she stood and started to pull her dress
up and hurry to the door. “Ruby?! Wait- Ruby!”
 
Ruby burst from the bedroom and Sam was left stammering on the bed, completely
lost on what to do or how to feel. Great, he thought, class on Monday is going
to be justgreat.
 
===============================================================================
 
“You know I left last night and didn’t come home until past curfew,” Claire
said as soon as he walked through the front door, dragging his feet from being
tired. Sure, Cain’s bed had given him the best sleep in his entire life, but
one night of a few hours of rest did not makeup for all of the other times he
didn’t sleep.
 
“Claire,” he said, ready to put his head through the wall, “It’s not even eight
in the morning, remind me to ground you later.”
 
“You can’t go to bed,” she snapped, which made his fists curl and Dean paused
to take a deep breath.
 
“Why not?” he asked, ready to hear her out.
 
“Because you promised Jesse you’d take him to the street fair today, remember?”
 
Dean opened his mouth to protest and then he did recall telling the kids they
could go to the fair, even though they’d all made it sound stupid, but he knew
they wanted to go. “It’s too early to go, it’s not even open.”
 
“It opens at eight and Jesse wants to go as soon as they open,” she replied. “I
already made him breakfast, you’re welcome beeteedubs.”
 
There was nothing he could say to change her mind and if he broke his promise
now, that would just be ground he lost in gaining Jesse’s favor. “You coming
too?” he asked.
 
“Yeah, nothing else to do.”
 
“Ugh-.”
 
“What? You don’t want me to come?” Claire glared at him, sounding truly
offended. “Wow, thanks Dean.”
 
“I didn’t mean it like that!” he protested as she stomped up the steps.
“Claire! Claire!” Dean clenched his hands into fists and turned to kick the
couch angrily a few times. After yelling and kicking, it took him a moment to
realize Jesse was watching him from the doorway to the kitchen. “Shit- hey…
Sorry-...”
 
“So we’re not going?” Jesse asked.
 
“No, we are. We’re going to the fair, we are.” Dean fished his wallet from his
back pocket to remove the cash Cain had given him. It was going away in the jar
they kept for rainy days. Cain had paid him one grand for the whole night; it
was the most cash he’d ever seen in his entire life.
 
“Can I get Claire and Adam?” Jesse asked as he followed on Dean’s heels.
 
“Yeah, sure buddy,” he replied, despite being distracted. “Hey, where’s Sammy?”
 
“Asleep.”
 
“Okay. Thanks.” Dean took a moment to calm down and he was glad Cain had fed
him before leaving, so he didn’t have to feel hungry for most of the morning.
Plucking one a crisp one hundred dollar bill, he shoved it back into his wallet
so he could get the kids some food or presents at the fair.
 
“Hey, loser,” Adam said as he came down the steps, ruffling Jesse’s hair on the
way. “Why’s Claire crying in the bathroom?”
 
Dean groaned, ready to knock himself out with enough drugs to take a bull
elephant down. “Because she thinks I don’t want her to come to the fair and I
do.”
 
“Oh, so she’s just being a girl?” Adam asked with a laugh. “Where were you last
night?”
 
Dean stuffed the money jar away and locked the cabinet. It was the only want to
keep the kids out of the cahs. “Work,” he replied.
 
“Doing what?” Adam frowned, clearly not buying any bullshit he could sell.
 
“Just work.” Dean shrugged. “Elle’s got me working late night shifts to do
stock and shit. I said I’d do it because it pays a shit ton more.”
 
“Oh. Sweet.” Adam grinned. “That’s cool, man, but I mean it kinda sucks that
you’re stuck working nights and stuff.”
 
He shrugged again and then turned his attention to Claire, Sam, and Jesse as
they all came downstairs. “Hey, we all ready to go?”
 
“Yeah,” Jesse said quickly. “Right?” He looked up at Sam, Claire, and Adam for
confirmation.
 
“Yeah, we’re ready,” Adam said with a smile. “Let’s go.”
 
Dean nodded and went to grab his keys from the jar on the counter. “Let’s go.”
 
===============================================================================
 
She’s wasn’t completely surprised that Dean didn’t want her to go the fair, he
didn’t even like her. He could pretend all he wanted that he cared about her,
but she knew he didn’t. No one cared about her; not her mom, not her dad, and
not her biological father either.
 
Dean had once argued that John had cared about her, which was why he hadn’t
taken her away from her mother, but Amelia Novak was no better in Claire’s
mind. She’d abandoned her and she was alone in the fucked up world.
 
Of course, now she was sitting at a picnic table under the hot September sun
and glaring at the worn out wood. Jesse was in line to get a balloon animal
with Dean, while Sam and Adam were in line getting elephant ears and funnel
cakes. It was as if they were one happy family and it was almost sickening to
think about. Especially when reality came crashing back down on them and they
realized they were poor.
 
They were poor and they lived in the slums and their dad was an alcoholic who
ran out on his kids ages ago. They were the poster children for those ad
campaigns on trying to help underprivileged kids in poor neighborhoods.
 
“So,” Adam said as he and Sam returned with food to sling his legs over the
table and sit, “what’s up sourpuss?”
 
“Shut up,” she snapped, angrily looking away to where Dean was standing off to
the side, while Jesse received his balloon animal. “God, I wish I was that age
again.”
 
“Why?” Adam asked with a laugh. “So you can pretend the world doesn’t suck?
News flash, Claire, it does suck and we’re all just floating through shit until
we die.”
 
“Wow,” Sam said with a dramatic roll of his eyes, “Way to be positive.”
 
“I don’t believe in being positive,” Adam replied with a shrug.
 
“Because you’re a pain in the ass,” Sam said. “Here, Claire, have some funnel
cake.” He passed over a plate with a half eaten funnel cake.
 
“Not hungry,” she replied with a shrug, trying to decide what Krissy Chambers
had that she did not. Why did Krissy get to make out with Alex and she didn’t?
“Do you guys think Krissy Chambers is hot?”
 
Sam shrugged, but Adam was quick to reply, “Yeah, she’s hot. She’s got that bad
girl vibe, but she’s also pretty. I would totally wanna bang her.”
 
“Whoa,” came Dean’s voice as he approached the table with Jesse, his hands over
Jesse’s ears. “How about we keep it family friendly? Yeah?”
 
“Sorry,” Adam said with a smirk. Obviously, he wasn’t sorry.
 
“Do you like my balloon animal?” Jesse asked Adam as he sat on the bench next
to him.
 
“Yeah, man, that’s cool. It’s a… giraffe?”
 
Jesse nodded. “Yeah, I wanted a giraffe.”
 
“Cool, Kid.”
 
Dean sank down next to her and she immediately slid away from him. “Claire, I
said I was sorry. How many times do I have to apologize?”
 
She shrugged and glanced down at the table. “Can I just take a walk, please?”
 
Dean’s eyebrows went up. “Claire, I’d rather you stay with us.”
 
“Please? Just this one time? I’ll meet you somewhere at a certain time,
whatever.” She shrugged and looked around, not wanting to look at him.
 
“Fine, but your butt better be back at the ferris wheel at four, okay?” Dean
said sternly and she nodded before getting up to walk away from the table and
the group.
 
The more she disappeared into the crowd, the better she felt. Claire lost
herself in the crowd, winding through lines and rides, until she rounded the
corner to see none other than Krissy Chambers. “Fuck,” she whispered before
marching up to her and standing right in her space.
 
“Oh, hey, Claire,” Krissy said with a smile. “I didn’t know you were here.”
 
“Are you seeing Alex?” she asked.
 
“Uh, what?”
 
“Alex. Are you seeing her?”
 
Krissy tilted her head as her eyes squinted together. “Oh, yeah, Alex. Sorry-
Annie. Alex, yes.” She shrugged and smirked a little. “I mean, we’re not like
dating-dating, but I’m definitely seeing more of her all the time. Why?”
 
Of course. Of course Alex would sorta date Krissy but not her. Of course.
Claire felt her hands go into fists and before she could stop herself, she was
swinging back and hitting Krissy as hard as she could in the face. The snap of
bone made Claire flinch, she didn't know if it was her hand that had broken or
if she’d bust Krissy’s nose, either way there was blood and a lot of it.
 
The crowd gasped and gathered around while Claire leapt on top of Krissy as she
felt and began to pommel her over and over until she felt someone grab her
shoulders to put an end to the fight. Her eyes were red around the edges and
there was so much blood. Krissy’s face was swollen up twice as large as usual,
her eyes were almost completely swollen shut, and there was so much red.
 
Vermillion. Crimson. Red.
 
Claire shook herself and yanked away from the man who had pulled her off of
Krissy and then began to run toward the Ferris Wheel. It wasn’t even close to
the time Dean had said they were meant to meet, but she still walked there
anyway and climbed on without even thinking about it. No one else was in line
and she sat in the carriage alone, ready to reach the top, and God did she want
the ride to break down. Desperately, she wanted the ride to stop and she was
just stuck.
 
High up and away.
 
Never again did she want to touch the ground.
 
Claire rode the ride so many times, she lost track, but it wasn’t as if the
wheel was a big hit at the fair. No one joined her, until she felt a heavy
weight slide in beside her and she didn’t have to look to know it was Dean. The
smell of Irish Spring and leather always gave him away. Plus that damn car of
his.
 
“What?” she asked, staring at her knuckles, which were bloody and she could
already hear the question Dean was going to ask her.
 
“Who was it?” Dean asked, which wasn’t what she’d expected. “And did they
deserve it?”
 
“Krissy Chambers,” she replied quietly. “And no… not really- I just got mad… It
was stupid.” Claire shrugged helplessly. “Alex is gonna ditch me now, so what’s
the point?”
 
“Claire,” Dean said slowly, reaching to take her hand and use a napkin he
pulled from his jacket pocket to wipe her hands clean. “I know you like Alex,
but you deserve someone better than her if she’s just stringing you along.”
 
“I know,” she sighed, trying not to slump, even though she wanted to. “I know I
shouldn’t care as much as I do about her, it’s not like she really likes me.”
 
“You’re gonna find some girl who will sweep you off of your feet, Claire. I
promise.” Dean smiled a little. “Or a guy, whichever. Doesn’t matter to me, I
don’t judge.”
 
“I just feel so shitty.” She slowly looked up at the sky and then realized they
were at the top and Dean had gotten on the Ferris wheel to be with her. He
hated heights; he didn’t even like to climb trees or ride up extremely high
elevators. “Thanks for sitting with me, I know you hate being up high.”
 
Dean snorted and shrugged a bit. “Just don’t remind me how high up we are and
I’ll be alright.”
 
“Right. Sorry.” A slow smile twitched along her lips and Claire laced her
fingers with his, giving his hand a comforting squeeze. “I’m sorry I’m so
annoying.”
 
“I’m sorry you live in a household full of teenage boys,” he countered. That
made her smile and laugh a little. “Look, Claire, I don’t want you to think
you’re not welcome in this family, because you are. I care about you, just as
much as I care about Sam or Adam or Jesse. I promise.”
 
Slowly, Claire leaned against Dean until he pulled his arm around her
shoulders. “Thanks, Dean.”
 
“Yeah, you’re welcome, kiddo.”
 
“I wonder if Jo-.”
 
“Jo Harvelle is too old for you,” Dean cut her off immediately.
 
“She’s not that old!”
 
“Old enough,” he spat back. “Pick someone your own age, I am sure there are
other cute girls dying to be with you in that school.”
 
She huffed out a sigh. “Fine.”
 
“Thank you.”
 
Claire glanced up at him and smiled a bit. “You’re such a mom.”
 
Watching the blush form on Dean’s cheeks was definitely worth it.
 
===============================================================================
 
 
Dean sighed as the guy behind him kept attempting to get his dick in his ass -
attempt was a bad word.
 
He was failing to get the dick in his ass.
 
“Dude, you need help?” Dean asked, finally fed up. He’d already fucked four
guys in one night and he was tired and ready to go home.
 
“I got it,” the guy spat, just as he finally was able to shove in.
 
Dean pretended to groan, but he’d been faking it all damn evening and he was
tired.
 
He’d been hooking for a month and in that month he’d seen so many STD tests
that the ladies at the clinic knew him by name. He’d insisted the last four
guys put on a glove; no glove, no love.
 
The only man who was going to be cumming in him without a condom was Cain.
 
Dean sighed and shut his eyes, trying to pretend it was Cain fucking him, but
Cain wasn’t awkward and it didn’t feel so rough or hard. The guy behind him
clearly had no idea what he was doing and Dean wasn’t even sure he could fake
it. Not after four other guys before this one.
 
“Moan or somethin’!” the guy snapped, giving his hip a smack.
 
“Make me moan and I will, dumbass,” Dean spat back. Okay, so maybe he should
have been more careful with his words, because that earned him a hard punch to
the ribs. Dean gasped as the air left him, but he managed to twist them so he
could push his john off and onto the floor. “Fuck off, dick,” he said coldly as
he gathered his clothes.
 
“What about the money?!”
 
“I don’t need your money, ass wipe.” Rolling his eyes, Dean left the hotel room
and made his way over to where Crowley’s car was waiting on him.
 
“That was fast,” Crowley commented with a frown, “too fast.”
 
“I wasn’t exactly banging Casanova, Crowley,” he replied as his eyes shut and
he relaxed against the seat.
 
“You didn’t finish him, did you? Dean, I told you, my whores have integrity, no
matter how bad it is.” Crowley gave him an unhappy look; he hated that look.
 
“Look, I’m tired Crowley. I’ve been fucking all night, faking it all night, and
I wanted a break… Then the guy decided to punch me.” Dean ran a hand over his
face. “I’m done, I just… I can’t do more tonight.”
 
“You’re not done until I say you’re done,” Crowley growled. “Now get your sorry
ass back in there, apologize, give that man a free blowjob, and then ride his
brains out. Got it?”
 
Every inch of him wanted to strangle Crowley in the backseat of his Benz, but
he didn’t. Dean kept his hands to himself and threw the door back open. He was
about to close it and storm back into the room when Crowley answered his phone.
 
“Crowley? … Yes…” Crowley snatched the back of Dean’s shirt to stop him. “Mhm.
Where at? Sure, I’ll bring him there myself. Pleasure doing business with you,
Cain.”
 
Oh thank Jesus. Dean glanced up at the sky, mouthed a ‘thank you’, and then
slid back into the car.
 
“You’re lucky he pays extra,” Crowley snapped. “More than that shithead in
there pays that’s for damn sure.”
 
“Where am I going?” Dean asked.
 
“A party.”
 
===============================================================================
 
Being nervous was not his MO.
 
In fact, he was hardly ever nervous. Not when he went to job interviews, not
when he was in public, not when he should have been ever in his life. But,
waiting for Dean to be dropped off at the hotel was the most nerve wracked Cain
had ever been.
 
He was so nervous, he found himself pacing outside to the point where the
doorman asked him if he were alright. He’d loosened his tie, his hair was a
mess, and Dean was late.
 
He didn’t like tardiness. It was worse than anything else he could imagine Dean
doing. Of course, his invitation had been horrendously last minute, which was
his fault, but that didn’t stop him from worrying. When the black car pulled
up, Cain almost collapsed to the ground in relief, but he straightened his
spine and turned to face the vehicle instead. His face remained neutral until
Dean climbed out of the car; he was wearing cheap sweatpants and a white t-
shirt.
 
It was the sloppiest he’d ever seen the young man.
 
“Hey,” Dean said with a warm smile, walking up to him, clearly glad he was free
of Crowley’s claws. “You look nice… Really nice.” Dean’s eyes trailed over him
and then realization dawned over his face. “Oh shit, I look like crap… I’m
sorry- Crowley just drove me straight over- I didn’t know-.”
 
“Shh.” Cain touched Dean’s lips with his fingers. “It’s alright… It’s not a…
normal party,” he admitted slowly.
 
“What kind of party is it?” Dean asked, his head tilting to the side.
 
Cain wrapped an arm around him and walked him away from the hotel and toward
another building entirely. It was nondescript and they were walking down the
alley toward a door that had a single security light over it. “A themed party.”
 
“What’s the theme?”
 
Cain knocked once and then a man opened up, looking them over. “Cain,” he told
the bouncer. “I should be on your list.”
 
“Yes, Sir,” the man said, his voice deeper than he looked. “Go on in… Is… he
your plus one?”
 
“Yes.” Cain pulled Dean closer. “He is.”
 
Dean continued to be confused as they walked inside and down a set of stairs
until they were heading toward a club that smelled of smoke and alcohol. Along
the way they passed several interesting characters; there was a ponygirl and
her master, and at the end of the hall there was a little and her caretaker.
Cain could feel Dean understanding as they came to step right into the
threshold.
 
“It’s a BDSM party,” Dean whispered.
 
“Yes,” Cain said as they stepped off into the shadows so he could think quickly
and assess the situation. “I was invited by a colleague with whom I haven’t
spoken in ages. Her name is Abaddon and while she is not my… favorite person, I
did not want to decline her invitation either.”
 
“Well, why do you need me here?” Dean asked, clearly nervous. He looked like a
caged, wild animal, ready to flee the scene at any moment.
 
“Abaddon has it in her mind that in order for any Dom to come, they must come
with their subs. I haven’t had a sub in years and she knows that… but what she
doesn’t know is I’ve met you.” Cain sighed and realized he was about to sound
horribly desperate. “If you could pose as my permanent sub for one night, I
will pay you triple what I paid you a few weeks ago.”
 
Dean stammered a few times and Cain could see the wheels turning in his hand.
“Three… three thousand dollars? To do this?”
 
“I realize it is unfair, in fact I’m disgusted with myself entirely, but…” He
sighed. “I have an awful rivalry with that woman… This is not how things go in
this community, I am being a terrible Dom in asking this of you at all.”
 
Dean shrugged a little. “Okay,” he said. “But I want you to promise me if I’m
sayin’ Impala, we get out of here.”
 
“Absolutely.”
 
“And I want you to promise me you won’t let someone else touch me.”
 
Cain nodded. “That is fair, Dean.”
 
“Good.” Dean sighed, shook himself all over, met his eyes, and said, “So, what
do I gotta do.”
 
Cain’s lips went into a thin line. “You won’t like this part.”
 
===============================================================================
 
Cain was right.
 
He didn’t like it. In fact, he hated it, but not for the reason that seemed so
obvious. He didn’t hate the get up because it seemed demeaning - he was naked
and on his hands and knees and attached to a collar and a leash, which was the
only thing Cain had on hand that he could hide in his suit jacket.
 
It wasn’t because people were grinning and whistling at him.
 
It was because the fucking floor was dirty and he was getting it on his hands
and knees. Plus, his knees already ached, and he’d probably only been on the
floor for fifteen minutes. Cain was very careful and no one stepped on his
hands, which he thought was thoughtful.
 
“Nice pup,” some guy in all leather said to Cain. “He purebred?”
 
Dean rolled his eyes. Were BDSM people into dog play? Jesus. Fucking weirdos.
 
“That isn’t quite the play he’s into,” Cain said, as if he speaking Dean’s
mind, placing a hand on top of his head with affection anyway.
 
“He’s got a good ass to spank.”
 
Cain made a noise of agreement and Dean blushed at the implication. God, was
this even real? Was this reallyhappening to him? It felt so damn surreal. He
dared to look up at Cain, unsure if he should speak or not. Was he allowed to
talk? They hadn’t gagged him, which was a relief.
 
“Bet it jiggles when he walks.”
 
That made him cringe; okay, so yeah he was fat, but did this guy have to rub it
in? Fuck.
 
“Excuse us, I believe I see someone I know,” Cain replied, lightly leading Dean
away. He was just glad Cain kept it at a slow and easy pace, since he wasn’t
used to walking around on all fours.
 
“Can I get up now?” he asked once they stopped again, far away from the guy who
wouldn’t leave them alone.
 
Cain glanced down at him. “You may rest on your knees, but you may not stand
up,” he replied, and Dean sighed as he sat up on his knees, feeling way too
exposed. He had no shame in his nudity, and he was a hooker; he did what his
john said unless it endangered his life or someone else’s. However, that didn’t
stop him from feeling awkward.
 
“Is your girlfriend here so we can leave?” he hissed, finally feeling fed up,
especially when everyone kept eyeing him like he was some type of meat.
 
Cain huffed. “I don’t see Abaddon-.”
 
“Cain,” came a woman’s voice, making them both turn to look.
 
A redheaded woman was leading some poor kid around on a leash, just like
Dean’s, but it was shorter and tighter. Dean immediately felt sad for the poor
boy; he was up on his knees, walking around with a pained expression. It didn’t
help that he had rings through his nipples which had chains attached to the
leash. Each time she tugged, he whimpered, and Dean gasped when he saw the
blood trickling down the kid’s chest and stomach.
 
“Abaddon,” Cain said, his voice cold and unhappy. “Who’s this?”
 
“Hm?” Abaddon glanced down at the boy. “Oh, him? This is Samandriel. Isn’t he a
darling? Picked him up from Alastair.”
 
Dean felt Cain stiffen as if he were angry, which if he were honest, he didn’t
blame Cain. He was pissed off too. Samandriel looked too young to be there in
the first place, not to mention he was in pain.
 
“Alastair is a disgrace,” Cain growled.
 
“And you’re not?” Abaddon asked with a derisive laugh. “Please, do you expect
me to believe that he is your sub full time?” Abaddon gestured at Dean as if he
were below her. Dean glared back at her.
 
“He is-.”
 
“He isn’t,” she replied with a grin. “I saw him climb out of Crowley’s car.
Your boy is a prostitute. I’m sure you paid him a pretty penny to come here
tonight, to make you seem important, when you’re not.”
 
Dean bristled as Abaddon began to berate Cain. It was gross and insulting and
Dean wanted nothing more than to say he was Cain’s, but he held his tongue,
just in case that wasn’t alright. Besides, he wasn’tCain’s. He was his own
person, except for when Crowley handed him over to some john.
 
“We’re leaving,” Cain said sternly.
 
“Yes, run away Cain. Run away and hide in your lonely penthouse. You’re
pathetic, old man. You’ve lost your touch.” Abaddon laughed and then yanked
Samandriel away.
 
Dean flinched and looked up at Cain in worry. Even from his place on the
ground, he could see Cain’s jaw was tight and there was a little vein popping
up along his temple. He’d never seen Cain look so angry.
 
“Daddy?” he asked quietly, hoping to soothe Cain’s anger. He pressed his face
against Cain’s hip and tried to be affectionate. “Are we going now?”
 
“Yes,” Cain snapped, his voice irate and clipped.
 
“Okay.”
 
Cain helped him up and then they were walking away to find Dean’s clothes
again, so he could get dressed, and head out to the car. Dean had a feeling he
would be soothing Cain’s wounded pride all evening.
 
“I am sorry I put you through that, Dean,” Cain said once they were settled in
the car. “I will not do it again.”
 
Dean bit his lip and dared to touch Cain’s arm with his hand. “Hey, it’s
okay-.”
 
“I will get your money as soon as I take you home.”
 
“Oh-.” Dean gulped and realized this was a dangerous game. Showing Cain where
he lived? Not only was it embarrassing, but what if Cain turned out to be a
stalker? “That’s okay, I can walk from the bar-.”
 
“That’s senseless,” Cain replied. “I don’t mind.”
 
He  let out a long sigh. “Okay, I’ll give you directions.”
 
===============================================================================
  
Sam frowned as he peered through the curtains.
 
Dean was outside, climbing out of a fancy car that didn’t belong in their part
of town. There was also an older man with him and he was walking Dean up to the
door, despite Dean obviously trying to get him to leave.
 
Who the fuck was bringing Dean home so late? And since when did Dean go out
with men?
 
The living room door opened up soon enough and Dean was shutting the door
firmly in the guy’s face. Sam frowned as he looked at Dean from his spot by the
window.
 
“Jesus, Sammy! What the fuck are you creepin’ in the dark for?” Dean demanded
as he placed a hand to his chest.
 
“Who was that?”
 
“Nobody.”
 
“Liar.”
 
“He isn’t anyone,” Dean replied stubbornly as he went to sit and take his shoes
off. “You should be in bed.”
 
“Who is that, Dean? He your boyfriend?” Sam walked over and smacked the TV
controller out of Dean’s hand, which made his brother stare at him in shock.
“Is he?”
 
“What the hell, Sam?!” Dean leaned over to pick up the controller where it had
landed on the floor. “What’s your problem?”
 
“My problem? My problem?!” Sam felt as if he were going to lose it and punch
Dean in the face, but he managed to hold his temper. “My problem is that you’re
running around with random people and keeping secrets from us! My problem is
that you’re never here and all you think about is yourself!”
 
Dean stared at him with wide eyes and an open mouth, as if he’d lost his damn
mind. Sometimes, Sam knew, the truth hurt. “Are you serious? All I think about
is myself?!” Dean stood up and gestured all around. “The only reason you even
have a house to live in is because of me! I gave up my life for you! For you
and Claire and Adam and Jesse!”
 
“Yeah?! Well, then how come I’m the one who’s been feeding the kids and making
dinner?! How come I’m the one who’s been watching them at night and giving up
my social life and homework time?! How come, Dean?!” He felt his hands begin to
curl into angry fists. “Maybe I just want to be a normal kid for once and go to
my friend’s house at night and not have to watch a nine year old kid. That’s
your job, Dean. You’re the adult.”
 
“So, I get to make the sacrifices, always?!” Dean demanded, finally standing
up, looking angry and fed up.
 
Sam nodded. “Yeah. That's what that means.” He watched Dean’s jaw clench and
unclench, before daring to continue. “It’s not fair, I know, and it sucks, but
you took on this role, Dean. You took on this responsibility. No one made you.
So, you better stop running around at night all the damn time and then come
home and bitch about being tired and not doing your fucking job.”
 
Maybe it was wrong of him to tell Dean how to run his life, but he wanted to go
out, have fun, have a good senior year. He wasn’t a permanent babysitter and
neither were Adam and Claire. If Dean wanted to take on the responsibility of
Jesse, then Dean had to suck it up and be a parent.
 
“I’m sorry,” Dean said as he looked away. “I’ll be better.”
 
“Good.” Sam shook his head and glanced at the door. “I hope that old dude
doesn’t have the clap.”
 
Dean’s jaw clenched again. “Sammy, don’t make me hit you.”
 
He shook his head. “And be like dad?”
 
That made them both pause. He wasn’t sure where all of the animosity for Dean
was coming from, but maybe it was because he was still in a bad mood over Ruby.
Maybe it was because he was tired of taking care of kids that weren’t his.
Maybe it was because he was due for a moody breakdown. Either way, he knew he’d
cut Dean deeper than necessary, but he wasn’t going to take it back now.
 
Dean didn’t respond, he just looked at him like he’d reach over and slapped
Dean’s face. Sam just stared back, challenging Dean to disagree, before Dean
finally gave up and walked off toward the stairs to go to bed.
 
“Night, Sam,” he muttered.

Sam watched Dean go and when he heard the door open and close, that was when
the guilt hit him. Maybe he’d make Dean breakfast in the morning, but tomorrow
was Sunday, which meant he could sleep in. He sighed as he checked the front
door to see if it were locked and then he was also going to bed, knowing full
well he wouldn’t be up in time to fix breakfast for Dean as an apology.
 
***** Chapter 4 *****
Chapter Notes
     I've added in Adam's storyline, mainly because I figured he deserved
     a storyline. He is with Michael, who is a little older than him, in
     this Michael's about Dean's age; Adam is 17, read at your own risk.
     The tags have been adjusted accordingly.
Getting out of bed was impossible.
 
He didn’t even have the desire to get out of bed, let alone the energy to
complete the act. It was Monday and Dean knew he needed to make breakfast and
get lunches together, but he couldn’t get up. Instead, he was lying on his
side, staring out the window, feeling lost and drained.
 
The kids didn’t need to know he was hooking to make the money they made and
Dean knew Cain was coming by later with cash; he had only asked he do it during
the day when the kids were in school. But what if he couldn’t even climb out of
bed long enough to accept the check? Three thousand dollars was a lot of money;
they could pay off bills, he could buy them so much food that their cabinets
would be stuffed for a month or more… but that wasn’t what he planned on doing
with the money.
 
No.
 
He was going to stash it away with the one grand.
 
Four thousand dollars.
 
Dean shut his eyes as he tried to picture that much cash, but it was impossible
to envision.
 
What did that look like? Did he cash the check or let it sit? Did checks
expire? Hell, he wasn’t even sure he had a bank account. Should he get a bank
account? Savings accounts? How did those even work?
 
Dean rolled over and pressed his face into the shitty pillow that felt dirty;
he desperately needed to buy himself a new one, but that wouldn’t happen
either. The money he earned from Cain was going to be used for the kids and the
things they needed. Like school supplies, school fees, school lunches. They
could have school lunches.
 
But only if he could get out of bed.
 
Dean felt tears fill his eyes as he even entertained the idea of getting up and
physically doing stuff. It was too much. Especially with Sam’s final words
looming over his head.And be like Dad? He shuddered at the thought; it was his
worst nightmare to be a carbon copy of John Winchester. Was he becoming his
father? For a while he’d assumed no, but now he just didn’t know.
 
“Dean? Where’s breakfast?” came the inevitable question and heavy knock on the
door from Sam. “Dean?”
 
Instead of answering, he pulled his blanket a little tighter around his body.
Sam knocked again and Dean wanted to just die. There was too much weight on his
shoulders. It was too much, it was all too much.
 
“Dean? Are you awake?” Sam knocked louder. It wasn’t making him feel any
better. “Swear to God, Dean.”
 
He shuddered and finally forced himself to get up, walk to the door, and open
it. Sam recoiled back a bit and stared at him with surprise. “I’m up,” he said,
his voice so monotone, he didn’t even recognize himself.
 
“What’s wrong?” Sam asked, but he didn’t answer.
 
Dean slid past Sam and made his way down the steps, feeling like a zombie with
every lift of his foot. Right. Left. Right. Left. One foot in front of the
other.
 
The kids were sitting at the table all looking confused as Dean kicked into
‘get shit done’ mode and began to dole out cash for lunch.
 
“Wait, school lunches? Like, food with money?” Adam asked with raised eyebrows.
He could only nod. “What about breakfast?”
 
Dean turned and opened the freezer to remove a box of Eggo waffles to start
toasting in the toaster for them. “There’s breakfast,” he said before turning
to trudge back up the stairs, ignoring the looks of confusion along the way.
 
His room wasn’t much, with the smallest of windows, dingy curtains, and with a
twin sized bed that was taken from a garage sale used, it was the only place he
could escape for a little while. It wasn’t much at all, since the previous
owners had converted the old closet to be a small child’s room, but it was his
now.
 
As he sank down on the bed, Dean remembered how when they’d first moved in,
he’d felt a sense of pride. They’d gotten the house with Ellen’s help and he
always made sure to pay the rent on time, which was the only bill he ever
managed to pay on time. Everything else, he was always a day or two late if not
longer.
 
Because you’re a failure who didn’t even finish high school. You’re a loser. A
stupid, fat loser.
 
Dean pressed the pillow over his head, trying to banish the dark cloud away.
However, it didn’t go anywhere, so he focused on the sounds coming from
downstairs instead, until they faded. Soon, Dean realized the kids were gone,
on the bus, and off to school. He was alone in the house and it needed
cleaning. He needed to scrub the bathroom tiles desperately and the kitchen’s
dishes needed done. Plus, the yard needed mowed and the front porch cleaned
off.
 
He sighed and shut his eyes again, ready to fall off of sleep’s precipice. One
more moment and he would be out, but then, the doorbell rang.
 
“Son of a bitch,” he whimpered, feeling too pathetic to get up again, but he
forced his legs to drop over the edge of the bed. By the time he pushed up, the
doorbell rang again. “Coming,” he called slightly, not even close to loud
enough for the person to hear.
 
Dean shook himself and forced his body to hurry down the steps and to the front
door, pulling it open, and not caring that he was in his underwear and a t
shirt. Until he saw it was Cain and then he definitely gave a damn.
 
“Oh,” he said. “Shit, sorry- I’m not awake yet.” No matter how many times he
ran a hand over his eyes, Dean knew it wouldn’t help. He looked like shit and
that was that.
 
“Good morning,” Cain said slowly. “May I come in?”
 
“Uh, the house is a total wreck, trust me you don’t want to-,” Dean attempted
to protest. If he were honest, Dean would have told Cain that he didn’t want
him seeing the squalor they lived in, but he was too proud to say that.
 
“I don’t mind,” Cain replied with a shrug.
 
Dean sighed, leaning heavily against the frame of the door. Did he look as
exhausted as he felt? From the look on Cain’s face, that was a definite yes.
“Okay,” he finally relented, slowly pulling away from the door to let Cain in.
“It only looks bad, I swear.”
 
Cain took a step inside and then Dean shut the door, putting them back into
darkness. He fumbled, tripped, and stumbled his way to flip on the lamp on the
table next to the couch, flinching at the trash and piles of clothing. Clearly,
he needed to do laundry too.
 
“Sorry,” he said again, finally sinking down on the couch tiredly, covering his
eyes for a moment to rub the sleep out of them. “I’m super tired. Had a long
night - well, you were there, you know.”
 
“I was there,” Cain agreed, his voice quiet as he stood in front of him. “If
what I ask of you is too much, then I will not ask it of you, Dean.”
 
“No!” Dean startled and stared up at Cain in fear. Was Cain going to stop
asking for him? Had he screwed them again? “I swear, it’s not like that- it’s
not… I just had a long night-...” He let out a long sigh.
 
“You look exhausted.” Cain slowly sank down on the couch, sitting on the edge
as if he were afraid to stain his clothes, which in all fairness, was probably
a possibility.
 
“I am,” he muttered.
 
Cain glanced around at the living room and then began to take off his suit
jacket, unbutton his sleeves, and roll them up. It was fucking hot.
 
“What are doing?” he dared to ask.
 
“You go upstairs and sleep,” Cain said as he gestured at the stairs. “I assume
that is where you sleep at least.”
 
“Yeah… it is… What are you doing?” he repeated with a frown. Was Cain going to
clean his house? The guy did not seem like the cleaning type; he probably had
enough money to hire someone to do that for him.
 
“I’m going to help you out,” Cain replied with a shrug. “Least I can do, you do
so much for me-.”
 
“You pay me.” There it was, the truth of their relationship out in the open. He
was a hooker and Cain was his john. One of many johns he’d had in only two
weeks. Crowley liked to keep him busy. “Cain, you pay me to have sex with you,
we are not in a relationship. The only thing you owe me is cash or check.”
 
As soon as he said it, Dean wanted to take it back and to apologize for saying
something so rude and mean spirited. Cain didn’t deserve that kind of
treatment.
 
“I see,” Cain replied quietly. “What if I told you I wanted to make it more
permanent?”
 
He blinked and then stood up, unable to take that sort of information so early
in the day. “I… I have to do dishes.”
 
“Dean.”
 
He shook his head and hurried off to the kitchen to turn the faucet on and
start scrubbing. This could not be happening, not to him; he didn’t get offers
like the one Cain just gave him. Not from rich men for certain.
 
“Dean,” Cain said again, his voice gentle.
 
“You can’t want to make this more permanent.” He spun around and gesticulated
at the ugly house, with floors that needed bleached and scrubbed, walls that
were cracked, and with so much laundry he didn’t even know where to begin.
 
“I’m a wreck! My life is a wreck! I have four kids who do not give a damn about
anyone but themselves! I dropped out of high school at sixteen, I didn’t even
pass the tenth grade! I can’t read for shit because it makes zero sense to me!”
He didn’t even realize he was yelling until he couldn’t stop, “I hate myself, I
wake up in the morning and I hate myself! I’m a whore. I get paid to fuck old
men and suck their cocks because I don’t have any other life skills to get a
better job!”
 
Cain held up both of his hands and then walked over to lightly place his hands
along his shoulders, moving slow and easy. “I don’t mind any of those things,”
Cain whispered, “Of course, the last bit could change. I can give you a better
job, you won’t have to want for anything.”
 
“You don’t even know me,” Dean spat back, feeling his eyes fill with tears.
“You don’t know me or my life or my kids.”
 
“I’m happy to get to know you and your children.”
 
He huffed out a frustrated sigh. “I don’t take charity. I hate charity.”
 
“This isn’t charity,” Cain said evenly. “This isn’t me taking pity on you, this
is me taking interest in you. I’m a Dom, Dean, I want to take care of you.”
 
He shook his head ‘no’ over and over again. Cain couldn’t want him. He was not
worth being wanted, by anyone, least alone Cain. “You don’t deserve me,” he
replied stubbornly, his voice wavering on breaking. “I’m a mess. I just want to
sleep.”
 
“You’re depressed,” Cain said, sounding like the true voice of reason. It was
so easy to nod and then fall against the man’s chest, begging Cain to support
him, which he did. Cain wrapped his arms around him and ran his hands over the
back of his head over and over. It was so damn soothing.
 
“I hate myself,” he whispered. “I fail the kids all the time and they know it.
I’m never home and I need to be home for them… but we need money. I can’t give
up money or we’ll be on the street or worse.”
 
“Then, let me help you,” Cain replied quietly. “Please, Dean.”
 
“It’s too generous- I can’t- I’m sorry.” He shook his head, finally pulling
back and supporting himself. “You’re nice, Cain, and-.”
 
“Dean.”
 
“What?” he asked, completely exasperated.
 
“What is the difference between taking my money after we have sex, then letting
me take care of you?”
 
Dean opened his mouth to answer and then shut it again. “There’s no strings
attached,” he finally managed to say. “In the first one. I’m not with you-.”
 
“Do you not want to be?” Cain asked.
 
He blushed and ducked his head. “I do… but if you’re with me, that means you’re
with them, too. I can’t just be bringing people into my life and then
disappoint them, okay?”
 
“I have no intention of disappointing you or them.” Cain held up three fingers
in an oath. “Scout’s honor.”
 
He wanted to say yes, he wanted to agree, but if he did, Dean knew bad things
would start happening. But, at the same time, a nap sounded amazing. Slowly, he
turned his eyes to back staircase and bit his lip, pondering as hard as his
mind would allow him. “Okay,” he finally said, feeling his shoulders slump and
give in. “Okay, but nothing crazy at first. Take it slow. Slow.”
 
Cain nodded. “Go upstairs, sleep, I’ll clean.”
 
“Okay.” Glancing back at the messy kitchen, a pang of guilt filled his chest,
but then Cain was marching him to the stairs, and he was going up them without
a second thought.
 
 
Ruby was by her locker with Anna hanging on her like she were never going to
leave her side. Sam sighed and steeled himself before walking up to her, ready
to assault her with apologies. Even if he didn’t really think he owed her an
apology, it was better safe than sorry.
 
“Hey,” he said slowly.
 
Ruby looked over at him, clearly unimpressed. “What do you want?”
 
“I wanted to say sorry,” he replied. “I’m sorry I hurt your feelings Ruby. I
didn’t… I mean I didn’t mean to.”
 
She shrugged a little and continued to mess around in her locker, but she
wasn’t really doing anything. Sam could tell she was stalling. “Yeah?”
 
“Yeah. I’m really sorry. Really.” Sam gulped and glanced down and then back up
to give her the classic puppy eyes. They always worked on Dean.
 
“Damn it, don’t give me that face.” She sighed and then turned to hug him. “I
forgive you, I overreacted. I guess.”
 
“Thanks, Ruby.” Sam relaxed as he realized bygones were bygones and they were
friends again.  “So, you guys ready to take our chemistry test?”
 
Ruby snorted. “No. I didn't even study.” She looked over at Anna and smiled.
“What about you?”
 
Anna shrugged, clearly trying to pretend she wasn’t as responsible as she
really was. “I sorta studied, but not really.”
 
“Yeah right.” Ruby linked arms with her and began walking down the hallway,
leaving Sam behind. He was left to hurry after them and stand awkwardly behind
them as they walked away. “You totally studied.”
 
“Okay fine, but what’s wrong with studying?” Anna asked. “I see nothing wrong
with studying. Why is it so wrong? Huh?”
 
“Chill, Miss Librarian, I’m just messing with you. I always get on Stretch,
too, don’t I, Sam?” Ruby glanced back at him with a familiar smile and wink.
 
He smiled back and nodded. “Yeah, she does. She also likes to cheat off of me.”
 
That made Ruby stick out her tongue. “Do not.”
 
“Do too,” Anna and Sam said at the same time.
 
“You know what you guys…” Ruby rolled her eyes as they made it into class.
“Fuck you.”
 
He and Anna broke out into a laugh as they settled down in their seats to start
class and take the dreaded test. Sam smiled at Ruby and Ruby returned his
smile. All was right with the world.
 
 
Telling her male gym teacher that she was on her period and couldn’t
participate in class was always a treat. He always looked extremely
uncomfortable and let her sit and do nothing. She also got a free pass to
wander the hallway under the pretense of going to the bathroom.
 
Claire made her way to the first floor girls room, letting herself in with a
tired push of the door. She hadn’t seen Krissy or Alex, but that didn’t mean
anything. The bathroom was empty when she let herself in and she dropped her
bag by her feet to lean forward and look at her eyes. They were tired with dark
bags hanging under them like black bruises. “Ugh, Jesus,” she muttered in
disgust as she dug around in her purse for some makeup.
 
As she was pressing some concealer to her skin the door opened and Alex walked
in. “Figured I’d find you in here.”
 
Startling, Claire spun around. “Alex-.”
 
Alex walked up to her and soon they were standing close. Too close; she could
feel Alex breathing. “You beat up Krissy. Did you really think I wouldn’t find
out about it?”
 
“I’m sorry,” she said quickly, which she really was. Beating up Krissy had not
been her plan. “It just… it happened. I wasn’t even thinking when I did it.”
 
“You really think that’s going to protect you?” Alex laughed. “Better watch
your back, bitch. Cody and Connor know what you did and they’re not happy about
it, because I’m not happy about it.”
 
Claire gulped a little and tried to play tough, her face an angry mask. “Fuck
you, Alex.”
 
Alex laughed and then Claire watched her remove a box cutter from her pocket.
It was small, but she could see the blade was sharp. Attempting to step back,
Claire felt her body press into the sink. Alex had cornered her. “Look, I liked
you Claire, you were cool, but I guess you’re just a bitch who thinks she’s
tough.”
 
“Alex…” Her heart was beginning to speed up, pounding against her chest as her
eyes stayed on the blade. Was Alex going to cut her in the bathroom? “I said I
was sorry.”
 
“Not good enough, bitch,” Alex spat back and Claire gasped when she slashed her
cheek quickly with the sharp blade. It happened so fast and the blade so sharp,
it didn’t even hurt. One moment she was fine and the next she was bleeding.
“Next time,” Alex said, pressed the corner near her throat, “I’ll aim for here.
So, watch your back, whore.”
 
Claire gulped, her fingers pressing against her face, not able to say anything
else. Alex finally stepped back and walked out of the bathroom as if nothing
had happened. As soon as the door shut, Claire grabbed her bag and bolted from
the bathroom as fast as she could. Rounding a corner, she ended up smacking
right into Randy, the guy who cleaned the school. His horned rimmed glasses
went askew as she ran into his chest, and she gasped as he reached out to hold
onto her before they both fell.
 
“Oh, Claire,” he said, quickly releasing her. “I’m sorry. That was probably my
fault.” He smiled a little and she backed up to be out of his touch. She’d
heard things about Randy - not the good kind. “You okay? You’re bleeding-.”
 
“I’m fine,” she spat before hurrying around him and walking down the hall
toward the office. As soon as she stepped into the main lobby, she went up to
the phone and began to dial out for her house, not caring if she were allowed
or not. Dean had to come pick her up. Immediately.
 
The phone rang a few times before a voice she didn’t recognize answered,
“Hello?”
 
Claire frowned. “I’m sorry- I think I have the wrong number… I’m looking for
Dean Winchester.”
 
“He’s asleep at the mom-. Oh, I apologize, he’s coming downstairs, who is
calling?”
 
Her frown only deepened. “It’s Claire, who’s this?”
 
There was a muffled conversation on the other end and then Dean was finally
answering, “Claire? What’s up?”
 
“Who is that?”
 
“Uh… I’ll explain later. What’s wrong?”
 
“I want you to come pick me up.” She glanced over her shoulder as she saw Randy
come down the hall toward the lobby. “Now.”
 
“Are you alright?” Dean asked slowly.
 
“No… Please just come get me, Dean. I don’t care what you tell them, just come
get me.” She hung up and began to walk the opposite direction of Randy, but she
had a feeling he was going to follow her. Breaking into a jog, Claire rushed
toward the lunch room; Sam had lunch now, she could hide with him.
 
“Claire, wait up!” Randy called. “I got a band aid!”
 
“Go away,” she snapped back as she went to throw open the door, but he had her
elbow. “Hey!”
 
“Easy, easy, I just wanna patch you up.” Randy held up the band aid like a
peace offering. “That’s all.”
 
“Don’t touch me,” she said. “I know what you did to Elizabeth and Jamie last
year.”
 
Randy sighed and pressed the the band aid into her hand. “Yeah, I won’t ever
live that down, but it’s not true. If it were, I wouldn’t be working here
anymore. I don’t touch young girls, alright? Not that way.” He sighed and took
a step back. “I hope you’re alright.”
 
“I’m fine.” Claire gave him a dark look before shoving the door open, dropping
the band aid to the floor and rushing out of the office and off to have lunch
with Sam. If she had her way, she wouldn’t be going back to school again.
 
 
After Claire hung up, Dean was surprised to see the house was so damn clean.
The couch was clear of trash, clothes, and it looked the cleanest he’d ever
seen it. The floor was vacuumed - when had they gotten one of those? - and the
kitchen smelled of bleach and lemon. Cain had put some serious work while he’d
been asleep.
 
“Wow, shit,” he said, looking around with wide eyes. “Man, this- You…” He
turned his eyes on Cain and stared at him with affection. “Thank you.”
 
Cain nodded and half smiled. “Are you hungry?”
 
He knew he should pick up Claire, but without a reason, he didn’t see the need
to go and get her. For all he knew, she just wanted to cut class, which she
would do with or without his help. “Starving,” he admitted quietly. “I don’t
eat that much around here.”
 
“Yes,” Cain agreed as he closed the distance between them and touch his face,
rubbing his thumb along the sharpness of his cheekbone. “That will change.”
 
He smiled shyly and glanced down at the floor. “Thanks again. This is real nice
of you.”
 
“I am glad you are happy.” Cain gestured at the couch. “Sit, watch TV, relax.”
 
Dean snorted. “I don’t know what any of those things entail.”
 
Cain chuckled and kissed his temple, sliding a hand down to grope the meat of
his ass. “Daddy wants you to relax,” he whispered right again Dean’s ear, which
made him shudder all over. “I want my little boy to sit and watch TV and be
good.”
 
Dean gulped as he sank down onto the couch. “Okay,” he said, looking up at him
with a boyish smile. “I can do that.”
 
“Good boy.” Cain placed a hand along the back of Dean’s head and then he was
walking off toward the kitchen.
 
Slowly, Dean turned his eyes on their small TV and turned it on; they didn’t
have cable, so the channels were limited, but he eventually did find a cartoon
to watch. It was better than watching the news or some nature documentary. It
ended as quickly as he began, but then afterward, Sesame Street came on and
that made him blush as he perked up to really listen and pay attention.
 
Sesame Streetwas a good resource to learn how to read, which was the only way
he could tolerate learning at all; they didn’t patronize him because the
letters made zero sense and everything was jumbled up most of the time. It also
didn’t make fun of him or call him lazy because it took him forever to read and
most of the time he just gave up. It was too much most of the time. However, he
still felt embarrassed when Cain came out into the living room with a plate of
food and he was sitting on the couch, in his underwear still, watching a
children’s show.
 
“We don’t got much to watch,” he said quickly, as if that would cover up the
real reason he was watching. Cain sat beside him, handing a plate with food
over. It looked good and not like the crap he had in his kitchen. “You go
grocery shopping?”
 
“No,” Cain replied. “I made this with what you had in your kitchen.”
 
“Oh… Well, shit.” He smiled shyly and began to eat. “S’good.”
 
Cain nodded. “There is no shame in watching educational programming.”
 
He blushed. “I’m twentyshixsh,” he said around a mouthful before swallowing.
“I… I shouldn’t need to watch this stuff.”
 
Cain glanced over at him. “But?”
 
He huffed out a sigh and glanced down in shame. “I’m stupid.”
 
“Somehow I doubt that.”
 
“I am. I can’t read well, I can’t write well either… I was never good in
school, I hate to read books. Takes me forever, I just give up.” Dean sighed
and stuffed his mouth with food again to shut up.
 
Cain frowned and began to pet the back of his head again. He loved it and
eagerly slid a little closer so Cain didn’t have to reach as far. “Why is that?
Explain a little more.”
 
“I dunno. The letters are all weird…”
 
“Weird, how?” Cain asked, gentle and prompting.
 
“Backwards sometimes.”
 
“Ah.” Cain nodded thoughtfully, still petting him, which was just nice. It made
Dean smile and almost feel like purring. “You’re probably dyslexic.”
 
“What’s that?” Dean frowned as he thought on the word. It sounded familiar, but
he wasn’t really sure what it was or what it meant.
 
“It’s considered a learning disorder,” Cain began slowly. “Resulting in
difficulty reading and writing.”
 
“Oh.” He huffed out a sigh; of course he was fucked up. It wasn’t surprising.
 
“It’s not your fault, Dean.” Cain gave him an encouraging smile. “Now, it might
be difficult to start teaching you to read at your age now-.”
 
“I know how to read,” he spat immediately, not wanting to feel more stupid than
he already felt.
 
Cain held up a hand. “I know you know how to read. I mean helping you read in a
way that will not be so tiring or strainful. There are ways to teach dyslexics
how to read… however, if you ever want help…” He trailed off and shrugged a
little. “I would be willing to help you.”
 
That made Dean blush and he quickly finished off his lunch. “Oh,” he muttered.
“Uh, thanks.”
 
“What’s your Daddy for?” Cain whispered against his ear, which made him squirm,
smile, and blush.
 
“Right.”
 
“If you like, I can pick up your siblings from school while you stay and rest
here.” Cain glanced at the clock and so did Dean. It was almost time for Sam,
Claire, and Adam to get home from school. Jesse would be an hour later. “If you
like.”
 
Dean shook his head. “No, no, that’s okay. I can do it.” He slowly handed the
plate back to Cain. “But thanks for the offer.”
 
“You’re welcome.”
 
Slowly, Dean stood up, shaking the fun off. “In fact, it’s probably best if you
go home now… I mean…”
 
He kicked himself.
 
That wasn’t how he meant it. It sounded harsher on the way out than it had in
his head.
 
Cain slowly stood up and nodded. “I see.”
 
“i didn’t mean it like that, I just… I mean they don’t really know about you,
except Sam sorta… and um...“ He shrugged helplessly. “I’m sorry.”
 
Cain nodded and made his way back to kitchen, only to return shortly after to
pull his jacket back on. “May I come see you tomorrow?”
 
“Uh…” Dean glanced all over at the clean house and he thought on how Cain made
him feel. All day he’d felt good and it was nice to feel that way, but he
couldn’t let Cain come over everyday when they were meant to be going slow.
“Maybe. I’ll call you… Slow, remember?”
 
“Of course.” Cain sighed slightly as he pulled on his jacket and made his way
to the door. “For the record, Dean, I did enjoy my time here with you. Have a
nice night.” With a curt nod, Cain was out the door and Dean was left to keep
on kicking himself.
 
One wrong move and it would be over, he could feel it.
 
 
While everyone else had a final period class, Adam had elected to have study
hall as his final class period. It was perfect because his study hall teacher
didn’t give a damn what they did, which was why he was always in the equipment
closet with Mr. Novak on his knees.
 
Michael Novak was the uptight calculus teacher, who was always handing out
detentions and pink slips and sending kids to the office. He liked rules and he
didn’t like to see them be broken. Except this one rule, which was not to sleep
with students. That didn’t stop them from sleeping together.
 
Michael sighed as Adam continued to bob his head slowly, taking more and more
of his cock into his mouth. “Shit,” Michael hissed, rising up on his toes.
“Gonna- gonna blow-.”
 
He moaned softly, wanting to encourage Michael to finish in his mouth. Usually,
he pulled out, just to be “safe”, but Adam wasn’t letting him go anywhere this
time. He wanted to taste Michael running down his throat and along his tongue.
He wanted to walk back to his locker with a shit eating grin while he thought
on Michael bending him over after to fuck.
 
“Fuck!” Michael panted as he came.
 
Adam pulled back so he didn’t choke - he’d been blowing enough dicks to know by
now how to pull back enough not to choke on the mouthful. When he did pull
back, he cheekily kept his mouth open to show Michael his load on his tongue.
 
“Shit,” Michael whispered, his eyes wide in the dim light. “Oh shit- that’s
hot…”
 
He swallowed and felt thankful that Michael ate a lot of fruit and healthily.
He didn’t taste like a garbage can. “Mmm, you actuallydon’t taste awful. Thanks
for liking citrus.”
 
Michael rolled his eyes and offered his hands to help Adam upright. “We
shouldn’t do this,” he said, which was what he always said. Adam knew how to
work him over though.
 
He smiled and began to pepper kisses along Michael’s neck and jaw, keeping from
kissing his lips out of consideration. “You’re hot,” he muttered, “and I’m
seventeen, gonna be eighteen soon, not that big a deal, Mr. Novak.”
 
Michael sighed, his hands and arms wrapping around Adam’s body to keep him
close. “No fair,” he said.”You know I like you calling me that.”
 
Adam winked and stepped back to drop his pants and boxers, slowly turning to
bend over some equipment stands. He was wearing a plug and had been wearing it
most of the day. He’d wanted it to be a surprise for Michael. A smile slid
across his face as he heard Michael’s intake of air; he knew Michael liked the
surprise.
 
“You’ve been wearing this all day?” Michael asked as he ran a thumb along the
smooth end of the plug.
 
“Most of the day,” he admitted. “I put it in during lunch.”
 
“How did you even get one?”
 
He laughed. “Look, I know people who know people who I may have paid to buy
this for me… well, for you.”
 
He felt MIchael wrap his fingers around the end and slowly remove it. “Oh,
that’s just, very dirty…” Michael’s fingers quickly replaced the plug and he
pressed into Adam’s hole, rubbing his prostate immediately. “Wet and open, how
I like it.”
 
Adam groaned and pressed his forehead to the metal of the stand. The wet and
sloppy sounds were enough to make him hard and his cock was quickly bobbing and
twitching, aching for release. He knew from experience they didn’t have enough
time to fuck, but Michael could definitely finger him until he finished.
 
“Such a sloppy little slut,” Michael mused as Adam continued to whimper.
“Shhh.”
 
“Sorry,” he gasped, bracing his legs wider so Michael had more room to play. He
couldn’t help but whimper when he felt Michael’s free hand slide down and rub
the skin of his perineum and then cup and roll his balls in slow circles.
 
“Do you like this?” Michael asked, his voice low as he continued to press his
fingers in deep.
 
“Yeah,” he gasped, his eyes fluttering as he felt his cock jerk. “‘Bout to
come.”
 
“Hold it.” Michael’s voice dropped so low that it made him whine. “Good. Good.”
 
“I’m holding it,” he whimpered, his voice cracking as he gripped the stand so
tight it made his knuckles turn white and his palms bleed. Michael knew how to
rile him up and keep him wanting. “Fuck- I can’t- I gotta-.” He rose up on his
toes and came, splattering his stomach and metal stain with white strips.
 
“Good,” Michael muttered as he slowly pulled his fingers free and Adam knew he
was watching his hole clench and unclench. “Do you want to put the plug back
in?”
 
“No,” he gasped. “No- I need a break-.”
 
“Alright.”
 
Carefully, Adam started to stand up and he was glad Michael grabbed his hips
and supported him. “Thanks, teach,” he said with a happy smile and fluttering
eyelids.
 
“You’re welcome,” Michael muttered against his ear, pressing his lips against
his neck. They stayed pressed together, catching their breaths, until there was
the muted sound of the bell ringing. “It’s time for you to go home, which is a
damn shame.”
 
Adam pouted and slowly turned around to yank his jeans and boxers back up.
“I’ll see you Monday?”
 
Michael nodded. “Of course.” He smiled and reached up to tweak his cheek. “You
better be ready to take your test or…” He trailed off and raised his eyebrow.
 
Adam grinned because he knew. “Yes, Sir.”
 
When the sound of the foot traffic died down, Adam let himself out of closet
and hurried off toward his locker, where Sam and Claire were already waiting.
He frowned as he saw Claire had a cut on her face and Sam was scowling.
 
“Whoa, hey, what happened?” he asked as he tilted Claire’s chin up to look.
 
“Alex,” Sam spat angrily. “Threatened Claire with her brothers.”
 
“Oh hell no.” Adam felt his hands clench into fists as he thought on Claire
being threatened. “Look, they give you a problem, you tell us. Got it? You
fucking tell us, we’ll put a stop to it.”
 
“I’m not helpless you know,” Claire spat.
 
“Yeah, but two against one? I don’t think so.” Adam looked at Sam. “Right?”
 
Sam nodded. “Right.”
 
“I don’t even want to come back here and Dean didn’t come pick me up like I
told him. I’m so pissed at him.” Claire crossed her arms and glared at the
floor. “He’s such a dick.”
 
“Lately? Yeah,” Adam agreed. “I don’t know what his problem is… and this
morning? What the hell was with that?”
 
Sam looked down and shrugged; it was easy to see he knew something. “I dunno.”
 
“You so know.” Adam grabbed his backpack and then they were walking down the
hallway together toward the front doors. “You know what’s up, tell us.”
 
“I saw him with a guy the other day,” Sam whispered. “An older guy.”
 
“Like with him, with him?” Claire asked. “Holy shit, Dean’s gay?”
 
“I don’t know!” Sam threw up his hands helplessly as Adam held the door for
them. “Doesn’t make sense to me… I may have yelled at him last night about it
actually. Said some stuff I didn’t mean.”
 
“Is that why he was so weird this morning?” Adam asked as they spotted the
Impala in the line of cars and parents. Dean was leaning back against it, his
arms folded over his chest, his usual stance.
 
“I guess.” Sam blushed and then hurried ahead of them to talk to Dean, but Dean
wasn’t having it. He snapped at Sam and then Sam was climbing into the front
seat, while they approached slowly.
 
“Hey, man,” Adam said slowly.
 
“Hey,” Dean replied, his voice deeper than usual, like he needed a fucking
drink. His eyes turned on  Claire and they softened and widened. “Claire, what
happened?”
 
“I told you to come get me!” she snapped. “But you don’t care about me.”
 
“What? Claire, I thought you just wanted to skip class! You should have said
something more specific!” Dean reached to touch her face, but she danced out of
his grasp.
 
Adam sighed and angrily climbed into the back of the car. If Dean didn’t care
about someone, it was him. Dean ignored him, didn’t ask him how his day went,
didn’t take a stance in his life. He was just wasted space. Pressing his head
against the back window glass, he shut his eyes and prayed that Michael would
invite him to live in his apartment soon.

It would be better than trying to fit in where he wasn’t wanted.
 
***** Chapter 5 *****
Chapter Notes
     So, many things happen in this chapter:
     - Age play (consensual age play) between Cain/Dean - if this bothers
     you, don't read the sex scene, however, I will say from a personal
     standpoint that this moment between them is fairly important, since
     it allows Dean to entrust Cain more and they grow closer after
     - Suicide Attempt/Suicidal Thoughts
     - Bullying
     - Sexual Assault
     - Angst (obviously)
“Can I use your laptop?” Claire asked Sam as she leaned against the door frame.
“Please?”
 
“It may not connect to the wifi,” Sam said slowly.
 
“I know, but I want to use it. Please?” She stuck out her bottom lip and he
nodded, gesturing for her to take it off of his desk. “Thanks, Sam.”
 
“Yeah, sure.”
 
Snatching up the laptop, Claire hurried back to her room and shut and locked
the door. She was glad she was the only girl in the house, it meant she had her
own room, while Adam and Sam had to share. Sitting up on her bed, Claire opened
the laptop and said a silent hallelujah when the computer connected to the
wifi. Three bars, that was enough to go to Facebook and see if Alex or Krissy
had said anything about her.
 
The page took forever to load, but when it did, she felt her heart jump. 99+
notifications.
 
She never had that many notifications. Never.
 
Clicking on the drop down list, she began to scan them and saw some were stupid
game requests, but they were mostly originating from a post on Alex’s wall.
Gulping, she dared to click on it to see what Alex had posted.
 
There were pictures of Krissy’s busted face with the caption - @Claire Novak is
a B I T C H she thinks she can beat up Krissy but she’s just a jealous, lying,
W H O R E
 
Tears filled her eyes as she began to read through the comments. Alex was going
on rants about how awful she was and she was a bitch this and a bitch that. How
Alex wanted to beat her up and she better watch her back, because her brothers
were out there.
 
Others were chiming in, claiming that they would back Alex up and she was a
nobody.
 
-Claire thinks she’s hot shit, but really she’s just a wannabe
-She only did it b/c she likes u alex
-Claire Novak is a whore
-Claire Novak is a bitch
-Claire Novak deserves to get her ass kicked
-Claire Novak deserves to be RAPED
                  -I’d fuck Claire Novak, she’s hot
                  -fuck her until she’s sloppy and pregnant
-Claire Novak wants to fuck ALEX
-Teach Claire not to be a lesbian
                  -yeah, she just needs some 8==D
                                    -lmao so true
 
There were tears streaming down her face as she read through explicit comments
about them wanting to rape her, fuck her, beat her up. There were too many to
report and she had a feeling the staff wouldn’t give a fuck. She was just a
teenage girl without any significance on how they could run their website, even
though the comments were all against the rules.
 
Part of her wanted to run to Dean, to show him what they were saying, but that
would be silly. She was sixteen, she could handle a little bullshit at school.
It would blow over and things would go back to normal. The little red x saved
her from looking through anymore of the comments, and she was back to surfing
tumblr and looking at porn.
 
Sometimes, a girl just needed some relief.
 
===============================================================================
  
Who showed up at someone’s house at six in the morning with a hot cup of coffee
from Starbucks in a bad area?
 
Cain, apparently.
 
Dean stared at the man like he’d lost his mind and then realized Cain had
probably shown up because he hadn’t called. “Hey,” he said, rubbing his eyes,
even though he’d been awake for an hour. “Sorry, I didn’t call you. I know it’s
been a couple of days.”
 
“Coffee?” Cain asked, offering it to him like currency.
 
Dean accepted the hot beverage, blowing through the lid, even though he knew
that would do exactly nothing. “Thanks,” he said. “So, just… in the
neighborhood?”
 
“You could say that,” Cain said with a shrug.
 
“Don’t you have a job?”
 
A little smirk played at Cain’s lips and he nodded a little. “I do,” he
replied. “I’m in investment banker, remember?”
 
“So, why aren’t you at work?”
 
“I have the day off.” Cain shrugged and then looked up at the house. “I was
hoping to spend it with you.”
 
A blush began to build along the apples of his cheeks. Of course Cain had the
day off and of course he wanted to spend it with him. “Why?” he asked, unable
to help himself. “I’m not that cool.”
 
“You wanted to take things slowly, I am going to respect that,” Cain replied
carefully. “However, that isn’t preventing me from wanting to spend time with
you.”
 
“The kids got school,” he tried to argue.
 
“You wanted me to get to know them, that was a stipulation, if I do recall.”
Cain raised his eyebrow and Dean felt his stomach and heart drop all the way
down out of his butt. The eyebrow always made him feel weak in the knees.
 
“I did,” he said slowly, before finally giving up and nodding. “Come in. They
aren’t up yet, but that’ll probably change soon.”
 
Cain followed him back inside and they were soon enveloped in darkness. Dean
kept the house dark, since he didn’t like the idea of people looking into their
windows, not that they had much to steal, but it was better than advertising
what they owned.
 
Dean made his way back to the kitchen, where he was packing their lunches,
since he didn’t want them to be too spoiled on the school lunches. He was
hoping to find another job and end his working for Crowley soon, which would
probably cut down on the cash flow by a lot.
 
“You are very dedicated,” Cain remarked as he went to stand in the middle of
the kitchen, which had somehow become a mess again already, even though it had
just been cleaned recently.
 
“It’s my job,” he said with a shrug. “Someone has to care about those kids, and
I know their parents don’t, and the State don’t, so may as well be me.”
 
The sound of heavy footsteps were making their way across the ceiling overhead
and then Dean steeled himself for the questions to follow as the kids started
to appear. How he was going to explain Cain he had no idea, but it was bound to
happen sooner or later.
 
“Whoa, who’s the old guy?” Adam asked as soon as he appeared, Sam on his heels.
 
“Uh-.” Dean glanced at Cain to make sure he wasn’t offended before turning to
look at Adam and Sam. “Guys, this is Cain, he’s a… friend. Met him at work.” At
least that wasn’t a lie.
 
“Oh.” Adam shrugged and pouted when he saw the brown paper lunch bags. “Packed
lunches? We poor again?”
 
Dean bit his lip and nodded a little. “Yeah, sorta. Just don’t wanna spoil you
on the school lunches is all. Where's Claire and Jesse?”
 
Sam wasn’t talking, so Adam trudged ahead, “Claire’s not coming out of her room
and Jesse’s in the bathroom.”
 
“Damn it…” Dean sighed and glanced at Cain in hopes he wouldn’t be assaulted as
soon as he left, but he had to check on Claire. “Be right back. Help yourself,
I made eggs and bacon.”
 
The stairs creaked under his feet as he rushed upstairs, and he could already
hear the muffled questions coming from Adam, which he was sure were directed at
Cain. God, he’d fed the man to the wolves without any warning. He wanted to
come in, he wanted to get to know them. He should be prepared to suffer the
consequences.
 
Claire’s door was shut and there was silence on the other side, which wasn’t
normal; usually, she was listening to music or at least making noise as she got
ready. But it was radio silence on the other end.
 
“Claire?” he called as he knocked.
 
Still silence.
 
The only sound was from the bathroom and the toilet flushing as Jesse left. He
put his hands on his hips and pointed back at the bathroom. “Did you wash your
hands?”
 
“Oh. No…” Jesse spun back around and rushed back to quickly splash his hands
around int he sink. He’d have to remember to disinfect the door handles later.
 
“There’s breakfast downstairs,” he called after the boy as he rushed passed him
and down the stairs. “No running!” It was no use, Dean knew, but he could at
least try. “Claire? C’mon, quit playin’ around, let’s go!”
 
The door yanked open and Claire was standing on the other side, looking like
hell. Her hair was a wild, blonde mess, she had day old makeup smeared under
her eyes, which only made the dark circles hanging there look worse. She wasn’t
dressed and her skin was so pale, he began to wonder if she were sick.
 
“Can I stay home?”
 
“Jesus, what happened to you?” he asked, completely shocked.
 
“Can I stay home?” she repeated.
 
“Uh... “
 
“It’s a girl thing.”
 
Ah, the P word; the word the boys all hated and didn’t like to talk about, but
he was stuck talking to her about it, because he had to be big brother,
mother,and father all in one day usually. “Yeah, sure. I’ll call in later,
okay?”
 
“Cool.” She shut the door in his face firmly and Dean sighed as he turned to
hurry back downstairs.
 
Cain was sitting on a chair and helping Jesse tie his shoes, which made him
pause and feel his heart melt for a moment. The bastard was good with kids?
Fuck, he was screwed.
 
“I got it, I got it,” Jesse insisted as he went to do the other foot.
 
Dean had been trying to show him how to tie his shoes for a while, since
apparently he’d never learned, and had let Sam and Adam do it for him. Pausing
to watch, Dean felt his heart soar as Jesse succeeded in tying the other shoe.
“Hey,” he said with a huge smile, offering a high five. “You did it, man!”
 
“Yeah,” Jesse said with a little smile, which was a first. “Thanks, Mr. Cain.”
 
“You’re very welcome,” Cain said, his voice very serious, since this was a Very
Serious Situation™.
 
“Okay, did we all eat?” Dean asked as they heard the bus start to honk.
 
“Yeah” and “yes” soon followed and he handed out the bags via name, except for
Claire’s, which he put in the fridge if she wanted it later.
 
“Okay, have a good day you guys, don’t do bad things. All that stereotype shit.
Learn somethin’.” He quickly ushered them out the door and then as it shut, he
let out a sigh of relief and leaned back against it for a moment.
 
“Now what?” Cain asked.
 
He held up a finger so he could take a moment to himself, but then he was over
to the phone and calling the school to let them know Claire wasn’t going and
she should be excused for being sick. Then, it was time to do the morning
dishes, and after he reallyneeded to see if Bobby would let him borrow his lawn
mower. After that, he had planned on going to see if Crowley had anyone for him
to fuck for quick cash, but Cain was here now, so he supposed he’d have to find
something else to do.
 
Cain stood up as he went to clean and stopped him, grabbing onto his elbow to
turn him around. “Do you ever pause for longer than a blink of a moment?” Cain
asked quietly, holding him to his chest.
 
“If I do that, then I won’t get anything done,” he replied helplessly.
 
“What needs done?”
 
“The lawn needs mowed, but I gotta check with Bobby and see if he’ll let me
borrow his mower again, and then the laundry needs done again, the bathrooms
need cleaned, I should probably go out and get some supplies for Claire, and
uh- I’m sure there’s something else. There always is.”
 
Dean looked up at Cain and tried not to look so tired, but he knew he looked as
exhausted as he felt.
 
“Look, when you’re poor like me, you gotta do it all and keep going all the
time. If you pause for just a moment?” He trailed off and glanced down at
Cain’s chest; he wasn’t wearing a suit today, it was just a plain shirt, a
light jacket, and a pair of jeans day - he liked casual Cain.
 
“If you pause?” Cain prompted lightly.
 
“If you pause then you get weighed down by all the crap. You realize your life
sucks and it doesn’t get any better and…” He shrugged and coughed to cover up
the lump growing in his throat. “So, you just keep doin’ and going and I don’t
ever stop. I just go, go, go.”
 
“Hm,” Cain hummed thoughtfully. “And I take it, you never take time for
yourself? Not even at night… You just… work and help them and work some more.”
 
“Yeah,” he sighed. It was tiring just to talk about it.
 
Cain pursed his lips in thought. “How about you take a break from that, hm? For
today, you take the day to take care of yourself.”
 
He blinked.
 
That was the only response he could muster. Take care of himself? Do something
for himself? Take a day to himself? All of those concepts were as wild as
unicorns and leprechauns. They didn’t exist in his world or any other reality.
 
“Better yet,” Cain continued, “letme take care of you.”
 
He huffed out a laugh. “Somehow I’m not surprised that’s what you want.”
 
“Is that so wrong?” Cain began to pet the back of his head, which made his eyes
half close and he wanted to purr and feel content all day. “To have someone
else care for you?”
 
“It’s just not in my vocabulary,” he said with a shrug. “It sounds nice, I just
can’t envision it.”
 
“I would like to, if you let me.” Cain just kept on petting him and he sighed,
finally giving in and melting against Cain’s body. “My boy needs taken care of
and that’s what I want to do.”
 
“Claire’s still here, remember,” he whispered.
 
“Oh, I am aware.” Cain nodded. “I will not proposition you sexually while a
minor is in the house.”
 
That was a relief. At least Cain had fucking manners.
 
“But, you are still my boy and I will still call you such unless said minors
are in your presence. As it makes you happy, does it not?” Cain slid his hand
around to cup his jaw and Dean sighed happily. It really did make him happy.
Too happy.
 
It made Little Dean happy, too.
 
Cain chuckled at the stirring in Dean’s sweatpants. “I see it does.”
 
“Sorry,” he muttered. “I’ll go the bathroom…”
 
Cain pressed his lips to Dean’s temple and then whispered in his ear, “Does
Daddy’s little boy need to take care of himself? Hm?”
 
Dean whined and shut his eyes, trying not to let Cain rile him up more, but it
was too late. “Don’t,” he panted. “I gotta- go to the bathroom…”
 
“Then go on, I won’t stop you.” Cain pinched his hip and Dean jumped into gear
and went to run up the stairs, even though he almost tripped and fell face
forward. As soon as he made it to the bathroom, his pants were down to his
thighs and his hands were on his dick like he was fifteen again and needed
desperate release from an accidental boner.
 
He was huffing and panting and trying not to, since Claire was across the hall,
but it was happening. The head of his cock was red and slick with precome,
which helped him slick up his shaft and he teased himself mercilessly until he
was biting his lip and trying not to start crying from how good it all felt.
 
He was Cain’s boy and he was going to get off hot and hard like he was a teen
again - not that he’d ever been allowed to be a teen. Not even a little. He
tried to stop the train of thought, but it was there and killing his hard on.
He hadn’t been allowed to be a kid or a teen - his whole life he’d been reared
to be an adult since the age of four.
 
Slowly, his boner began to flag, despite him attempting to get it up again.
“Damn it,” he whimpered, glaring at his penis. It always failed him at the most
inconvenient of times.
 
There was a light knock on the door. “Dean?” came Cain’s voice which made his
eyes widen and he quickly yanked his pants up like he’d been caught. “May I
come in?”
 
Gulping, Dean pulled the door open with red cheeks. “I’m fine,” he said.
 
“Claire is gone.”
 
“She’s what?” He hadn’t even heard her leave. “Where’d she go?!”
 
“She said she was going to school, I offered to drive her, but she insisted she
walk and then she was out the door…” Cain sighed. “I wasn’t sure if I should go
after her or go to you, obviously I chose the latter.”
 
Dean groaned. “Whatever. Whatever- I can’t worry about this right now, I just
can’t.” He ran a hand through his hair in distress and then Cain was pulling
him close again in comfort. He had to admit, that was nice.
 
“I can go and pick her up, drive her there myself.”
 
“No, no I got it. I’m going.” Pulling out of Cain’s arms, he took two steps at
a time as he went down them and out to the car to speed after which direction
he figured Claire would take. She hadn’t gotten far and was walking with the
hood of her jacket pulled up and her hands shoved into her pockets. “Hey,” he
called as he pulled up beside her. “Get in.”
 
She paused, rolled her eyes, but turned to climb into the car. “You don’t have
to drive me. I got it.”
 
“Thought you said you were having ‘girl problems’.”
 
“I am,” she said with a shrug. “But I forgot I got a test today in English I
can’t miss.”
 
“Oh, shit, okay. Hold on then.” Dean stepped on the gas and Baby lurched down
the street toward the school. It wasn’t farper se, but it was far enough he
didn’t want any of them walking alone.
 
“Who was the old dude?”
 
Dean rolled his eyes. “Cain. He’s a friend.”
 
“A close friend?” she asked with a smirk.
 
“None of your business… but, maybe, yeah.” He shrugged as he pulled into the
fire lane in front of the school. “I mean maybe we’re close, maybe we’re not,
stop asking questions.”
 
“Touchy,” she replied with a wink. “See you after school. We’ll take the bus,
Casanova.”
 
“Bye.” He watched her hop out and hurry inside and it was only when he’d
reached the house again that he figured maybe he should have gone in with her,
but technically he wasn’t her guardian, John was all of their guardians. John
wasn’t around to sign things, so Dean just forged his signature most of the
time. It wasn’t like it was hard.
 
Cain was waiting for him inside, sitting on the couch. It was nice to see him
in his house, but it was such a shit hole, that Dean hated seeing him there
when he lived in luxury in the city. “Is she alright?” Cain asked immediately.
 
“Yeah,” he said with a nod. “She’s fine, it’s all good.”
 
“Good, now come here.” Cain patted the couch and Dean saw the look. It was the
stern Daddy look, so he shuffled over and stood in front of the couch, unsure
of whether to sit or stand. “I interrupted you earlier, I apologize if your
time was ruined.”
 
“Oh, nah, that wasn’t you…” He shook his head. “Nah- I was… I was thinking
about how it felt like I was sixteen again, but it didn’t really.” Dean
shrugged and tried to laugh it off, but it wasn’t funny. “I was never a kid or
a teen, you know? I’ve been an adult since I was four.”
 
Cain gently pulled him down until he was sitting in his lap. “Do you want to
be?” he asked quietly against his ear.
 
“Want to be what?”
 
“Sixteen again.”
 
Dean snorted and began to wonder if Cain were on some type of drugs. The guy
was always suggesting wild stuff. “I can’t be sixteen again, man, unless you
know how to time travel.”
 
“No, but you can pretend.” Cain began to rub his back in comforting
circles.”With me, you can pretend if you like.”
 
Thatsounded dirty. Really dirty. Even more dirty than the stuff they’d done in
the past. “Like… when we fuck?”
 
“Or when we’re not, age play does not have to be sexual,” Cain pointed out. “If
you want, you can pretend to be sixteen again, get into that mindset, relive
the years you missed. I’ll take on the duties of your home while you’re with
me, you can watch TV, you can sit around in your underwear, you can forget you
have responsibility.”
 
Dean gulped as he thought on it some more. If he pretended to be a teen again,
he could mouth off, he could pretend they were having dirty, illegal sex, which
was a weird turn on. Cain could be his Daddy and his daddy. And then when the
kids came home, he could shake it off and be in the present all over again.
 
“Sounds like a nice set up,” he admitted with a blush. “I just dunno much about
it.”
 
“It is whatever you want it to be. You can set the rules and limits. If I ever
do something you don’t like, you just safeword. You can safeword when we’re not
engaged in sexual activity, too. Then, the play stops…. and we do not scene
when you are upset or in distress. Do you understand?”
 
Dean nodded emphatically. “Okay.”
 
“Good. As long as that is clear.”
 
“So, can we start now?” Dean asked, biting his lip nervously.
 
“Of course. How old are we today?”
 
He gulped and glanced down at his lap. “Sixteen,” he whispered. “Please.”
 
“Of course.” Cain began to pet and rub his back, even sliding his hand up to
massage the back of his neck. “Do you want to sit and watch some dirty movies
while Daddy makes you brunch?”
 
Oh, man, porn. God, he hadn’t watched porn in years, since he was always busy.
He also didn’t have a computer; he had some dirty films in the closet, but he
didn’t watch them. “Yeah,” he admitted, feeling breathless and aroused already.
 
“And where are your dirty movies?” Cain asked, his voice low and gentle. It was
only making Dean feel hotter, like he needed to get out of his clothes
immediately.
 
“In the closet. Under a bunch of boxes, in a black box…”
 
Cain nodded as he slid Dean out of his lap and onto the couch. “Just relax and
enjoy yourself.”
 
“Okay…” He couldn’t stop blushing and usually he wasn’t embarrassed over
anything, but this was different. Once he was sitting, he lifted his hips and
pushed his pants down to reveal the bush at his base, which was damp with sweat
and his cock was half hard. He didn’t touch himself yet, he was just waiting
for Cain to return.
 
He needed a few breaths to remain calm as he tried not to get overly hard in
anticipation. No, he wanted to save that for the porn. The sounds of Cain
digging around slowly died down and then he held his breath as Cain walked over
to stand in front of the TV and put on a movie. It was some cheesy porn film he
hadn’t seen in ages, but Cain winked at him, patted his head, and then went off
to the kitchen.
 
The sounds of a woman moaning built up quickly and Dean licked his lips,
staring eagerly at her body and how the guy fucked her fast and hard. Soon, his
cock was standing and bobbing up against his belly, asking for attention. He
wrapped a hand around his cock and began to jerk it, like he did as a teen -
not like he did now. Fast, quick, and leaving him panting and desperate for
release. His cries echoed the girls on the screen and before he could stop it,
he was coming all over his hand and stomach in thick spurts.
 
Clearly, he didn’t jerk it enough.
 
Of course, the only problem with pretending he was sixteen, was that his dick
didn’t quite want to stand up right after he’d finished like it had ten years
ago. He needed a moment to catch his breath and watch some more, before feeling
aroused again. Which he didn’t mind, especially when he could pull his legs up
on the couch, slide a hand down, and tease his rim for a while.
 
Eventually, Cain was walking back out to the living room with food, right in
the middle of him finally becoming aroused again. HIs cock was hard and he was
sucking his fingers to try and finger himself.
 
“Is my boy being naughty?” Cain asked him as he sat down in a chair, the plate
resting on the coffee table. There was a seriously delicious looking breakfast
meal, with green stuff and everything waiting on him to eat.
 
But, Dean nodded, and continued to suck on his fingers, making dirty noises
along the way. “Yeah,” he said as he popped them free, reaching down to cup his
balls and trail the slick fingers to his ass. “Fuck.”
 
Cain watched and Dean didn’t miss the tent in Cain’s pants. He grinned and
slowly sank two fingers into his hole with a groan.
 
“You like this?” Dean asked as he fingered himself slow and deliberately. He
couldn’t reach his g spot at the angle he was sitting, but he was doing his
best to show Cain what he was doing. “You like… watchin?”
 
Cain nodded, his face a reserved mask. “You’re doing a good job,” he said, his
voice very serious. It made Dean whimper and whine, wriggling around
helplessly. He loved praise.
 
“Daddy, I’m so horny,” he panted, pulling his fingers out and stretching his
hole open so Cain could see him being dirty. “I want your cock in me.”
 
“First you eat your food.” Cain gestured at the meal. “Then I will reward you.”
 
“Okay.” Panting, Dean slid off of the couch and onto the floor to start
shoveling the food in. At sixteen he’d been a garbage disposal and that hadn’t
changed much, but he hardly had time to eat for himself, which was why he was
glad Cain made him stop and eat.
 
It was considerate and it made his chest feel warm and fuzzy.
 
When he sat back to digest for a moment, Dean sat and watched the porn, his
eyes focused on the girl’s wet pussy and how she was dripping and it made him
stir again. Even though older men got him hot and heavy, he still liked to
appreciate a gorgeous woman. Every inch of his body wanted to bury his face in
between a woman’s legs.
 
“Shit,” he growled, his voice deep and hoarse.
 
Cain stood up and sat down on the couch, unzipping his jeans to get himself
free. “Sit,” he said, gesturing at his cock. “Sit so you can watch.”
 
Nodding, Dean spun around on his knees to take Cain into his mouth first,
eagerly drooling on the big cock, making it nice and wet. Cain grunted, but he
mostly stayed quiet, his face its usual stoic mask. Once Cain was wet enough
for Dean’s liking, he stood up and turned his face to spread his cheeks and
show his sloppy hole, before he was sinking down onto Cain’s cock.
 
A moan escaped his throat, as he settled and Cain wrapped his arms around his
waist, pulling him so his back was pressed up against Cain’s chest. “Oh, God.
You get me so hot, old man,” he moaned as he focused on the porn and the girl
masturbating, while Cain began to fuck him slow.
 
It took him a moment to realize Cain was matching the pace of the girl, so when
she rubbed and fingered herself quickly, he was thrusting up into Dean just as
fast, but when she slowed down? Dean whimpered and whined at each slow drag of
Cain’s hips, feeling his cock slide in deep and then almost back out again over
and over. It was torture.
 
“Such a sensitive boy,” Cain muttered as his hand slid up and began to tease
Dean’s nipples. The pink buds soon became rosy red as calloused fingers pinched
and pulled at them. There was only the sound of the TV and Dean’s whimpers and
the slap of Cain’s balls against his thighs.
 
“Daddy,” he whimpered, finally losing himself to the play. “Daddy, fuckme,
please. Just fuck me.”
 
Cain’s response was to speed up and rub his chest until it was warm and pink.
He gasped and felt his legs spread as wide as he could get them.
 
“Is my little boy going to come?” Cain growled in his ear and Dean nodded as he
stared down at his cock. It was almost purple at the tip and smearing precome
across his belly. Any moment and he was going to come in a big mess.
 
“Yes,” Dean whined as he finally felt his cock twitch and jerk. “Yes, yes,
yes!”
 
The warmth grew to be too much and then Dean was finally releasing; he came so
hard he was lying limply on top of Cain soon after, whimpering as he kept
coming. Cain reached down and began to jerk him through it, easing more cum out
of him until he was painted in it.
 
“My, my,” Cain mused as he slowed down again to keep Dean stimulated. “My
little boy has quite a bit in there.”
 
“Been a while,” he mumbled sleepily.
 
Cain chuckled. They both knew it hadn’t been a while, but it had been a long
time since he’d had an orgasm likethat. In fact, he wasn’t sure he’d ever had
an orgasm so intense that he just kept on coming. His eyes were heavy with
feeling sleepy, even though he knew Cain was still hard inside of him. The
man’s stamina was amazing in Dean’s eyes.
 
“You’re not done,” he mumbled.
 
“No, I’m not,” Cain replied gently, his hands now rubbing Dean’s sides, thighs,
and hips. “But you are. You’re very sleepy.”
 
“I wanna get you off, Daddy,” he replied, even though it didn’t come out very
coherently.
 
“How about I take you upstairs to bed?”
 
“But-.”
 
“If you want Daddy to finish, will you let him rub between your legs while we
lie down?” Cain asked quietly and Dean shuddered at the thought. It was so
dirty.
 
“Yeah,” he whispered as Cain pulled out and there was some shuffling as they
righted clothes and then Cain was carrying him upstairs. He clung to his jacket
as they headed upstairs to Dean’s room, which wasn’t much of course, but he
liked the idea of Cain being there. In his room. There with him when he woke up
later. It was all a nice set of thoughts.
 
When Cain laid him on the bed, Dean eagerly became the little spoon. He liked
being cuddled, even if he were slightly ashamed to admit it. Cain wrapped his
limbs around him, which wasn’t easy in Dean’s small bed, but once they were
comfortable, he felt Cain press his cock between his thighs and up against his
ass to rub. He panted and whimpered as Cain eagerly made the bed shake.
 
When Cain groaned into the back of his neck, Dean felt something hot and wet
press against his balls and ass and he knew Cain had finished on him. He was
going to be a mess later, but the idea made him smile.
 
He loved being Daddy’s dirty little boy.
 
===============================================================================
 
 
“Hey, whore.”
 
“Look, the slut decided to show up to school today.”
 
Claire ducked her head and kept walking down the hall. She had come to school
to take her stupid English test, even though Dean had already called her off.
She’d made it just in time to take the test, and now she was regretting showing
up at all.
 
Everyone was calling her a whore, a slut, a bitch, a cunt. She was a virgin and
yet she was now the school whore. And it was all because of Alex. Shoving past
some more girls that she didn’t even know, Claire marched up to Alex and tapped
her on the shoulder. Alex spun around, still smiling and laughing, but that
faded when she saw her.
 
“What’s your problem?” Claire demanded. “Why are you spreading rumors about me?
I said I was sorry, okay? I’m sorryI beat up Krissy. She was my friend, too!
It’s not like I meant to do it.”
 
Alex smirked and pushed her back. “Because, you’re a whore, Whore.”
 
“I’m not!”
 
“Yeah, you are. Daddy didn’t want you anymore because you were a slut, so he
walked out on you and your Mom. Then Mommy went crazy and now you live here. No
one wants you, Claire.” Alex smirked and crowded Claire until she was pressed
back against the lockers. “No one.”
 
“Fuck you, Alex!” Claire felt her hands clench into fists as she tried to fight
to urge to hit her, too. If she hit Alex, she’d be asking for it then, which
was kept her from doing it. With her luck, her brothers and everyone else in
the entire school would join in on the fight.
 
“I heard that’s what you wanted,” Alex said with a cold laugh. “You wanted to
be fuck buddies with me, but you were jealous, so you beat up Krissy. Well,
news flash bitch, I didn’t want you. I was only your friend because I felt
sorry for you. Not because you’re hot or cool or popular. Because you’re none
of those things.”
 
Claire felt her lower lip trembling and she was trying so damn hard to not shed
any tears. Not in front of Alex anyway. “You’re a bitch, Alex,” she whispered
shakily.
 
“Yeah, well, at least I can admit that I’m a bitch.” Alex shook her head and
walked off, leaving her up against the lockers feeling as if she were going to
collapse.
 
Claire’s eyes fell on Krissy, who looked guilty, as if she were blaming herself
for the bad situation. She glared back and spat, “I said I was sorry. You
couldn’t just get over it, could you? Fuck you, too.”
 
Before Krissy could respond, Claire stormed over to her locker to open it and
get her stuff. Fuck school; she was done with school. She was old enough to
drop out and old enough to make her own damn decisions. The locker’s lock went
smoothly, but the door wouldn’t open, not until she yanked and almost fell back
into a group of students walking behind her. Out of her locker spilled a ton of
notes and pieces of paper. The kids in the hallway began to laugh as she
unfolded one.
 
Her heart leapt into her throat at what the note read in angry red letters.
 
                              KILL YOURSELF WHORE
 
Tears filled her eyes as she realized they all had a version of kill yourself
written on them, all in different hand. Alex had been busy the night before.
Her vision turned white as she tried to gather her stuff, but she gave up and
ran down the hall instead, backpack and everything forgotten. She ran until her
lungs burned and her legs were on fire; she ran until she couldn’t run anymore
and she found herself in the gym. Randy was there, mopping the floor.
 
“Hey,” he said as he straightened and fixed his glasses. “You okay? You’re real
pale.”
 
“No,” she whispered. “No. I’m not okay. I’m not.”
 
“You want to talk about it?”
 
The tears were starting to roll down her cheeks now and she knew her face was
an ugly red as she kept on crying. “Alex is being awful.”
 
“How so?” he asked, remaining where he was standing, leaning on the mop.
 
“She’s spreading lies that I’m a whore and a slut…” She shook her head and
swallowed the lump in her throat, before walking up to Randy with her head held
high. “She’s making the whole school hate me.”
 
“Hm. High school isn’t fun for everyone,” he said. “I know it wasn’t for me.
But, it’s just a blip on your lifespan, it’ll be over before you know it.”
 
If Alex wanted to call her a whore, maybe she would just be a whore. “Did you
really not do those things?” she asked.
 
Randy looked away and returned to mopping. “No,” he spat. “It was a false
accusation and they had no evidence against me.”
 
She licked her lips nervously. “Maybe we should do them, then.”
 
He startled and dropped the mop. “Claire- I can’t. Not only is it wrong, but I
won’t risk going to jail. No way.” Randy shook his head and bent to pick up the
mop quickly. “You can get someone else in trouble, not me.”
 
Claire bit her lip and looked away. Of course, even some old man didn’t want
her, why had she expected Alex, as hot as she was, to want her. No one wanted
her - Alex was right. “Forget I said anything,” she said before turning and
hurrying out of the gym.
 
There were some girls hanging out by the bathroom and they all stopped giggling
to stare at her. Some of them whispered whore and others called her a bitch on
her way down the hall. They weren’t going to stop anytime soon, Alex would see
to that - she had three years left in the shithole of a school she went to.
 
Three fucking years.
 
The tears came faster as she wandered aimlessly, unsure of where to go or who
to talk to. Dean didn’t want her, her parents hadn’t wanted her, Alex didn’t
want her, she had no friends. They were all superficial and quick to leave as
soon as Alex turned her back on her. Rounding another corner, she ran into
Connor and Cody.
 
Fucking great.
 
“Hey, little girl,” Connor said with a grin. “Where you running to?”
 
“Leave me a alone,” she replied as she went to step around them, but Cody was
pushing her up against the wall so roughly she smacked her head back against
the concrete.
 
“You think you’re so tough, don’t you?” Cody said as he held her in place. “Get
her pants down, Connor.”
 
“No!” she screamed and fought against them as Connor stepped forward and began
to unbutton her jeans to pull them down enough for Cody to get to her. “No!
Stop!”
 
Connor’s hands were tearing her panties aside so Cody could grope her, grabbing
her roughly to start to shove his fingers into her. She screamed and squirmed
and then a classroom door was opening and her eyes widened as she saw Sam’s
fist connect hard with Cody’s face. Blood splashed across the walls and one of
the teachers was standing in front of her to block her from any other bloodshed
as Sam continued to punch Cody in the face.
 
Connor was running down the hall, but she could just make out someone chasing
after him. Everything was happening so fast and it took three bigger men to
pull Sam off of Cody and get him to stop. She could see Cody’s face was worse
than Krissy’s had been; his jaw was hanging so loosely and blood was pouring
out of his mouth, it made her stomach churn. Sam must have broken his jaw.
 
“Walk it off, Winchester, walk it off,” Mr. Novak said as he turned to look at
her. “You alright?”
 
She nodded as she attempted to get her clothes right and back into place.
Security was jogging down the hall as they were finally alerted to the
situation. Turning, Claire began to walk down the hall feeling  as if she were
in a hazy fog. The world was going so slowly now that the trauma was over and
she was fairly certain people were talking to her, but she just kept walking.
 
She walked all the way down the hall and eventually found herself in the art
room. No one paid her any mind, not even the teacher. So many people came and
went during art class, it was normal for someone new to just pop up. Why am I
here again?she found herself thinking, trying to put her mind into the right
headspace, and then she remembered.
 
Sharp objects.
 
Exacto knives.
 
“Right,” she whispered before going to dig through a drew until she found a
brand new one. Sam had been walked off by another teacher or maybe he would
have been there. She could have used him.
 
The blade fit in her hand so easily and so well. Afterward, everything was just
red.
 
===============================================================================
 
There were sirens and alarms and the whole place smelled of disinfectant. It
was a madhouse, but Dean was winding his way through hallways to find the
fucking Emergency Room. He had to find the Emergency Room. He had to find it.
 
“Sir? Sir, are you lost?”
 
Dean blinked and realized he probably looked like a crazy person. “ER. I’m
looking for the ER, my sister- she’s here-.” English didn’t make sense anymore,
everything was coming out as broken sentences.
 
“Okay, take a deep breath.” The woman approached him and it took him a moment
to realize she must have been a nurse. “Take a deep breath for me and tell me
your name.”
 
“Dean Winchester,” he said without taking a deep breath. “My sister is here,
she’s not really my sister- my half sister. She was brought in, severe
bleeding, please-.” The last word came out broken as the emotions finally
caught up to him.
 
Receiving a phone call in the middle of the afternoon that Claire had started
hacking away at her body with a sharp razor blade during class was the worst
moment of his life. Even worse than that was learning from the principal that
she’d been sexually assaulted by two boys in the hallway just moments before
she attempted to kill herself. He’d driven so fast to the ER that he’d probably
left skid marks on the road.
 
Cain was off to pick up the other kids so he could get there in time.
 
Just in case.
 
“Okay, follow me, I’ll take you to the Emergency Room,” she said, her voice
calm and soothing, but he needed her to hurry, to run, to make haste. There was
no time to wait, not now. “My name is Nurse Braeden and I’m going to help you,
okay?”
 
“Okay,” he replied brokenly as she walked him down another hallway until they
were standing in front of the ER desk. As soon as he was with  nurses who could
help him, he didn’t know what to say. The words were gone and he just felt
broken.
 
“This man is looking for his sister,” Nurse Braeden said.
 
Another nurse looked up at him, his eyes the most startling blue. “I can take
it from here, thanks Lisa,” he said, his accent strange to Dean’s ears.
 
“You’re welcome, Benny. I hope your sister is okay.” Lisa gave him an
encouraging smile before walking off to leave him alone with Benny.
 
“Can I get your sister’s name?” Benny asked.
 
“Claire,” he whispered. “Novak. Claire Novak.”
 
“Alright, thank ya.” Benny typed away into a computer and nodded a little. “She
was just brought in by squad, uh, she’s… Well…” He looked up at him before
standing and walking around the desk to lead him to a chair.
 
“Is she alright?” he whispered, staring at Benny in hopes that the man could
make it right again. “Is she gonna be alright?”
 
“Ain’t too many notes about her in the system,” Benny started carefully, “
‘Cept she’s in critical condition and they’ve rushed her off for emergency
surgery.”
 
Bile began to churn in Dean’s stomach and up into his throat. “Please tell me
she’s going to be alright. She’s only sixteen-.”
 
“She’s in good hands,” Benny said as he sat with him on a bench, holding his
hands and rubbing his back. “I can’t promise nothin’, but I can say she’s in
good hands.”
 
Dean gulped and felt the tears leak out of his eyes. His hands were starting to
shake in Benny’s and he wasn’t sure what to do. Claire was in emergency
surgery; she needed surgery, not stitches. Surgery.
 
Benny sat with him until Cain and the kids walked in. “You with him?” Benny
asked quietly as Cain came to stand near the bench.
 
“Yes,” Cain said as he knelt down directly in front of Dean.
 
“He’s in a bit of shock,” Benny whispered. “I’ve been watching his pulse, it’s
a little high, but he should be alright. Just needs some comfort. Anythin’ else
happens, you let me know.”
 
“I will.” Cain took Benny’s seat and Dean could feel Cain’s hands replacing
Benny’s. Cain’s hands were familiar; calloused in all the right places and soft
in others. They were strong and he knew they knew his body religiously.
 
“Is she okay?” Adam asked and finally Dean snapped out of his own state of
shock to look up at the kids. Jesse was in tears and clinging to Adam’s side.
 
“Hey,” he said, only then truly realizing Cain was there and holding his hands
and being affectionate with him. So much for taking it slow. “Uh, she’s in
emergency surgery… and, um, I don’t know much else.”
 
“Shit,” Sam whispered as he sat down. Sam’s hands were swollen, Dean noted.
 
“I hope that’s from you beating the creep who did this to her,” he said, eyes
on Sam’s knuckles.
 
“Yeah, it is,” Sam said. “I heard her screaming in the hall and I went out
there and…” He trailed off, his eyes falling on Jesse. “Well, it wasn’t good
what he was doing to her.”
 
Dean clenched Cain’s hands tightly as he thought of kicking the kid’s ass
himself. If it wouldn’t have landed him in jail, he would find that bastard and
beat the snot out of him. “I hope you did a number on him,” he replied gravely.
 
“He did,” Adam said. “I saw him in the office, he was a mess.”
 
“Good.”
 
Cain squeezed Dean’s hands back and looked at Jesse. “Perhaps, Adam, you could
take Jesse to get something to eat. I believe this is about the time he’d be
coming home to a snack, yes?” He looked at Dean for confirmation.
 
“Yeah,” Dean said as he glanced at Cain’s watch. “Would you Adam?”
 
“Sure, with what money?”
 
Cain fished out his wallet and handed him a twenty. “Get yourself something,
too.”
 
Adam slowly took the cash. “Dean, are all of your friends rich? Because, why
are we so poor then?”
 
Dean felt his jaw clench. “Adam, just take Jesse to get something, please.”
 
Jesse stepped forward to hug Dean around the neck once and then he was dashing
off with Adam without another word. Dean smiled a little as he saw some
brightness in the giant cloud of darkness that continued to linger over them
like the fucking plague. If it wasn’t one thing, it was another.
 
“She’s going to be okay,” Cain told him, sounding so damn sure of himself.
 
Dean looked over at him and he wanted to slap Cain in the face and tell him to
stop being a fucking liar. No one knew if she were going to be okay or not. She
could die on the table for all they knew. She could just try and succeed again.
It was all up in the air.
 
“Dean, can I talk to you?” Sam asked, his voice rough and angry.
 
“Sure,” he replied heavily before slowly letting go of Cain and following Sam
off into a hallway.
 
“Who is he?” Sam demanded. “I wanna know.”
 
“I told you, I met him at work,” Dean said, feeling exhausted and fed up.
 
“Yeah, right. He’s rich as hell, he drives a Benz. Who is he?” Sam gave him a
dark look and Dean knew he was tired of being lied to. He couldn’t exactly
blame Sammy.
 
Taking a deep breath, Dean focused his eyes on the ground. “I did meet him at
work, but I’m not working atThe Roadhouse anymore. Haven’t been for a while
now.”
 
“Then where are you working?”
 
“For Crowley.” Dean went quiet and let that sink in and slowly he saw the
recognition flit across Sam’s face.
 
“You’re a whore?” Sam hissed, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper.
 
“Yeah, Sam, I’m a hooker. Why do you think we’ve got so much cash? I get it
from the guys who… do me.” He shrugged and shoved his hands into his pockets.
“I ain’t proud of it and I didn’t want you to find out… but… Cain likes me, he
wants to stick around. I like him, too.”
 
“So, he wants to be… what? Your boyfriend?” Sam asked, sounding as if he didn’t
believe it.
 
“I guess,” Dean said. “I don’t know what he is, because I don’t know what I
want… but what I do know is that I like him and he’s been… he’s been here.”
 
Sam nodded a little. “So, does he still pay you? Are you still… I mean…”
 
“Yeah, I am, but I’m trying to find a new job. I don’t wanna be a hooker
forever, alright? And Cain doesn’t pay me to hang out or to be here or to have
sex, not anymore. It’s different now.” Dean glanced back down the hall where
Cain was sitting in the waiting room, looking stoic.
 
“So it’s not permanent?” Sam asked.
 
“I hope not. I gotta talk to Crowley or Cain does… Cain said he could give me a
job, but I didn’t want it to be that easy.” He looked down at his toes. “I
don’t even know what kinda job- but, nevermind, okay? That shit, you don’t have
to worry about it, that’s for me to worry about.”
 
“Dean-.”
 
Dean grabbed Sam’s shoulders and looked him in the eye. “I’m the adult,” he
said, repeating Sam’s words back to him. “It’s my job to take care of this
family and this house, okay? Right now, I want you to go see Benny at the desk
and see if they can give you some ice for your hands and then after that, I
want you to go down with Adam and Jesse and find something to eat.”
 
Sam nodded as he swallowed back some words. “Okay,” he whispered.
 
“She’ll be okay. She’s strong. She’s a fighter.” Dean tweaked Sam’s cheek and
then patted his back. “Okay?”
 
“Yeah.”
 
Dean nodded and then he walked Sam up to the desk to see about some ice, before
returning to Cain and sinking down with a heavy sigh. He pressed his hands to
his face so he could keep it together; if the kids saw him broken, they
wouldn’t have anyone to look to for strength. He had to be strong for them.
 
“I don’t know what to do,” he whispered finally.
 
Cain slid his hand over to his arm, giving him another comforting squeeze. “You
also should eat something.”
 
“Not hungry,” he replied with a shrug. “Tired, but not hungry.”
 
“Do you want some water?”
 
He shook his head and finally took a moment to lean against Cain heavily,
wishing that he could hand all of the responsibility to Cain. Out of everyone
in the whole goddamn hospital, Cain seemed like he could handle anything and
everything with strong shoulders and a stoic face.
 
“What do you want, then?” Cain asked, looking at him very seriously.
 
“I want to close my eyes and make this nightmare end,” he replied quietly. “But
that’s not how life works.”
 
“There must be something I can get you, do for you. Help with.” Cain met his
eyes and took his hands to squeeze. “I want to help you.”
 
“I know and I appreciate that,” he said quietly. “Thank you for everything,
Cain, I’m sorry you’re in this crap.”
 
“I took it on willingly,” Cain replied. “Don’t forget that, Dean.”
 
He half smiled and nodded once. “I’m gonna go see if I can find the kids, um…
God, in this moment I wished I had money for cell phones.” Immediately his eyes
began to water again as he realized the were so poor they couldn’t even contact
each other in an emergency.
 
“I could fix that,” Cain said as he started to stand up.
 
“Cain-.”
 
“Everyone should have a mobile phone, Dean, even I’ve come to accept that… and
I’m an old, grumpy man who hates technology.” Cain smiled a little and Dean
realized he was half kidding and half not.
 
“But it’s a lot.” Dean sank back down into his chair and went to hold Cain’s
face with both of his hands. “You’re the best thing to ever happen to me and
I’m worried you’re going to go away and then I’m worried that I won’t have
these nice things anymore and the kids will be disappointed.”
 
“I have no plans in going anywhere,” Cain replied as he pressed their foreheads
together lightly. “They don’t have to be fancy.”
 
“I don’t need nothin’ fancy, just… numbers and phone calls.” Dean shrugged a
little. “The kids, though, they’re gonna want that fancy stuff.”
 
Cain chuckled and pressed a slow kiss to his lips. “I’ll see what I can do.”
 
Dean gulped and kissed him back, tears leaking out of his eyes. “Thank you,” he
said quietly.
 
Cain smiled a little and kissed him again. “You’re welcome. I will return
shortly.”
 
“Really.” Dean grasped onto Cain’s hands and kissed his fingers, feeling
completely indebted to him. “Thank you. For everything you’ve done and
everything you’re doing.” He was fairly certain he saw Cain blush, but the look
passed and Cain was heading out toward his car.
 
Dean blushed too and then looked down at the floor. Once again, he was alone,
and there was no one around to comfort him. At least that meant he could cry
freely. And he did.
 
===============================================================================
 
 
“Are you okay?”
 
Sam slowly glanced up from where he’d been staring at the wall opposite the
chair he’d been sitting in. There was ice on his hands and Dean had told him to
get something to eat, but he hadn’t done that, he’d just picked a random
waiting room to sit in and hadn’t moved since. There was a brunette nurse
staring at him, looking really concerned for his well being.
 
“My sister’s in emergency surgery,” he replied, feeling the weight of those
words resting over his shoulders. They were weighing him down and preventing
him from getting up to check on the others. “I don’t know how she is doing.”
 
“Are you with Dean Winchester?” she asked. He nodded. “I’m Lisa Braeden, I
walked him to the ER… What’s your sister’s name, I could maybe find something
out for you?”
 
Sam gulped and felt tears fill his eyes. “Claire Novak. She’s my half sister.”
 
“Okay,” she whispered before kneeling down in front of him to take his hands.
“It’ll be okay.”
 
“What if it’s not?” he whispered. “What if she’s not okay? What if she just
gives up?”
 
Lisa’s face softened further as she squeezed his hands and looked him in the
eye. “I don’t want to say that will happen, because it may not happen. Is your
sister a fighter?”
 
“Oh, yeah,” he said with a little smile. Claire was definitely a fighter; she
didn’t go down without some serious punches. “She’s definitely a fighter.”
 
“Good.” Lisa smiled and brushed some of his hair out of his face. “Where’s the
rest of your family?”
 
“I don’t know… I just started to wander. I’m sorry- I don’t even know where I
am right now.”
 
“Well, you’re in the maternity ward, I can walk you back down if you want?”
 
He blushed and looked down at the floor. Great, people had probably passed him
and assumed he was another young dad. Not that there was anything wrong with
that assumption, it was just wrong. “No, I got it.”
 
“Okay. Well, when you walk out of here, turn a right and go down to the first
floor. Once you’re there, take another right and that hallway you come to will
have signs pointing to the ER, okay?”
 
“Thanks,” he said before pulling his sore hands free of her gentle ones. “You
know where to find me if you find something out about her.”
 
“Yes.”
 
Together they stood up and she walked him to the door that would take him to
the elevators. He thanked her again and then he was on the elevator and going
down to the first floor to make a right or was it a left? Sam sighed as he
realized he didn’t remember her directions and maybe he should have had her
walk him at least part of the way.
 
The hospital was a nice hospital; it was big and busy and he’d passed at least
two chapels, a man playing piano, and countless of sitting rooms. All of his
life he’d wanted to go into law and help put bad people in jail, but now that
he was standing in a place full of medical professionals, he began to wonder if
he should be pre-med.
 
Dr. Sam Winchester.
 
It had a nice ring to it, that was for sure. Sam sighed as he slowly began to
remember that they could never afford college, let alone medical school. Not to
mention medical school was a popularity contest anyway; you had to know people
who knew people to have a better shot at being accepted. It was incestuous in
Sam’s mind, but that was how academics ran itself.
 
“Sam!” came Adam’s voice, which made him spin around to see Adam walking up to
him, Jesse in tow. “She’s out of surgery.”
 
Sam felt his heart soar and then they were running back down the hall; at one
point, Sam didn’t recall when, but he ended up picking Jesse up and running
with him in his arms so they could make it back to the ER. Dean was talking to
some doctor and Cain was coming in through the doors with bags in tow.
 
“How is she?” he panted as he came to stand next to Dean and the doctor.
 
“Put me down,” Jesse whispered to him.
 
“Oh, sorry Jesse.” He set Jesse back down and turned his attention on the
doctor who was speaking to Dean, or had been speaking to Dean before they’d
walked up and interrupted the conversation. “Is she okay?”
 
“She’s in serious condition,” the doctor replied slowly. “We’ve been able to
patch her up and do some transfusions, but the rest will be up to her.”
 
“Is she awake?” Dean asked.
 
“No.”
 
“Why not?” Sam demanded, his eyes flickering to the doctor’s badge. Dr. Kevin
Tran.
 
“We’re keeping her asleep so she won’t be in as much pain… and of course, she’s
just gotten out of surgery, she was under quite a bit of anesthetic,” Dr. Tran
replied slowly.
 
“But, do you think she’ll recover?” Dean asked, his voice quiet and Sam was
surprised to hear him sound so unsure. Usually, Dean had a good head on his
shoulders, he always knew what to do, and he never wavered. Dean was their
rock, but Dean was looking like a rock that was weather beaten and exhausted.
Like at any moment it would start to crumble into the ocean and float away.
 
“That’s up to her,” Dr. Tran repeated. “I wish I could give you better news,
but I can’t.” He gave them all a sympathetic look. “My advice is you go home,
get some rest, and come back tomorrow. We will call you in the early morning to
tell you how the night went. No news is usually good news.”
 
Dean nodded and Sam wanted to argue, to claim they’d stay at the hospital, but
if Dean were already nodding, it was a done deal. They would go home and stare
at each other, feeling empty instead.
 
“Thanks, Doc,” Dean muttered before Dr. Tran walked away.
 
“We’re just going to go home?” Sam demanded. “Shouldn’t we stay here?”
 
“He’s right, Sam,” Dean replied as he ran a hand over his face. “We should go
home and get some sleep. You kids have school tomorrow and-.”
 
“You’re smoking some serious crack if you think we’re going to school
tomorrow,” Adam spat.
 
Dean glared at the two of them. “You’re going to school tomorrow because it’s
important you go.”
 
“But I don’t wanna go,” Jesse protested. “I want to stay with Claire.”
 
“Buddy, Claire wouldn’t want us all hovering around her and stuff.” Dean gave
Jesse a weak, but encouraging smile. “Your job is to go to school, alright?
It’s important you go everyday… and we don’t know how long she’ll be here, so
you are all going to school tomorrow. End of story.”
 
Sam clenched his hands into fists, even though it hurt, and he wanted to punch
Dean in the face. Of course, the only thing Dean could think about was school
and how they all had to run off and attend fucking school. He opened his mouth
to speak, but it was Adam who lost it.
 
“You only want us to go to school so you can fuck your boyfriend!” Adam yelled,
which made the entire waiting room go silent and Dean’s face turned beet red.
“Right, Dean?”
 
“Adam, please,” Dean whispered as he glanced around them in alarm. “You wanna
yell at me, fine, but yell at me in the car, not in public.”
 
Adam just gave him a nasty look and then he was storming out of the doors and
Sam was quick to follow and so was Jesse. He didn’t want to know if Dean turned
to Cain and apologized, he just wanted to punch something or scream or run
away. Everything was so fucked up and Sam was starting to wonder if it was
because Cain had come into Dean’s life.
 
They knew nothing about Cain, because Dean kept it all under wraps, and how
they’d met “at work”. Now, Sam knew Dean was a hooker and having sex for money,
but he was trying to stop and Cain was his boyfriend. It was strange to hold
that knowledge from everyone else. So, as they reached the car, Sam pulled on
Adam’s elbow.
 
“What?” Adam asked, looking about as tired as Sam felt.
 
“Dean’s a hooker,” he replied.
 
“...What?”
 
“What’s a hooker?” Jesse parroted.
 
Sam looked down at Jesse and said, very seriously, “A hooker’s a person who
gets money to have sex with people.”
 
“Holy shit,” Adam hissed with wide eyes. “Is Cain like his pimp?”
 
“His boyfriend,” Sam replied with a shrug. “He used to pay Dean, but now he
doesn’t. But I saw bags from Verizon in his hands when he came in.”
 
“So, now he pays Dean in cell phones?” Adam looked around like he was
completely lost. “Why are our lives so fucked up?”
 
“I dunno,” he admitted as Dean began to appear, Cain on his heels. “But I’m
sick of it.”
 
“Me too,” Jesse agreed, which made a sad smile cross his face.
 
“You too?” Sam asked as he hugged Jesse with one arm. “Well, maybe this Cain
guy will buy us nice stuff, so at least there’s that.”

Adam snorted, but didn’t say anything as they climbed into the Impala. Sam
glanced back at Dean as he accepted the bags, said something to Cain, and then
he was walking toward the car. He couldn’t help but glare at Dean before
sliding in the front seat. If Claire didn’t make it overnight, he would never
forgive Dean again.
 
***** Chapter 6 *****
Chapter Notes
     Warnings for this Chapter:
     -More suicidal thoughts
     -Suicidal threats
     -There is also a sort of suicide attempt, but not quite
There was a boy who looked too young to be on the street corner standing under
a lamplight, smoking a cigarette. The cloud of smoke was hanging over his head
like a halo and his long, svelte legs were nicely tanned. The dark hair on his
head was a mess and Dean caught a glimpse of sparkle along his exposed, flat
stomach. He was prettier than some of the girls he’d worked with.
 
Dean pulled up beside him and rolled down his window. “Hey,” he called. It felt
weird picking someone up when he was used to the one being picked up.
 
He’d finally decided to quit working for Crowley and so far he’d gone a whole
week without getting paid for sex. He’d even found a job cleaning houses, and
since he loved to clean, he figured it would work in his favor. Claire was
still in the hospital and he didn’t even want to think about it anymore; Sam
and Adam went everyday to visit her and he did too, but he always did it alone.
 
The kid walked over with a sway in his wide hips. “Hi,” he said. “What’s your
name?”
 
“Dean,” he said. “I’m not here to pick you up for sex.”
 
“Then what the hell do you want?” the boy demanded icily.
 
Dean shrugged a little. “Can I pay you to just… let me talk to you? Vent?”
 
There was a pause as he considered it and then he nodded a little. “Sure, if
that’s what you want.”
 
“What’s your name?” he asked as soon as the kid made his way into the car.
 
“Cas.”
 
“Nice to meet you, Cas.” They pulled away and Dean just drove. He wasn’t even
sure where he was going, he just needed to get the hell away from his life for
a while.
 
“So, you want to talk,” Cas said.
 
“Yeah.” Dean nodded, his eyes on the road. “I used to do what you do… I used to
get paid for sex. It sucked.”
 
Cas snorted and blew some smoke out of the car. “Yeah, well, I don’t have many
options, okay?”
 
“i’m not judging you,” he said quickly, glancing over at him. “I get it. I
didn’t either. I had zero skills and no degree or education to get a good job.”
 
Cas looked over at him slowly. “That’s the thing,” he said quietly. “I do. I
graduated from high school, I went to college, I did all the right things. I
still ended up here.”
 
“You still go to college?” Dean asked as he pulled onto the highway. It took
him a moment to realize he was driving to Cain’s apartment.
 
“No, I dropped out.” Cas shrugged and flicked his finished cigarette out the
window. “I couldn’t afford it and my parents wouldn’t pay for me to major in
dance. I refused to major in something they wanted me to, so I quit.” He
shrugged.
 
The initial reaction Dean had was wanting to be angry at Cas for giving up
something so precious; he would have killed to go to college, to have that
life, but he’d never had the chance. And Cas just threw his away? But he paused
to digest Cas’ sentence instead; his parents had refused to pay for what Cas
had wanted, so he’d thrown it away because he would have been miserable
otherwise.
 
Dean knew and understood that feeling.
 
“And everyone gets so mad at me,” Cas said, as if he’d read Dean’s thoughts.
“The people I meet, they’re always pissed off that I spat out the silver spoon,
gave up my life of privilege, and ‘chose’ this life.” He rolled his eyes and
glared out the window as the cars and lights passed by. “I didn’t choose this
life. I got put into it.”
 
“I’m sorry,” Dean said, realizing his venting session was turning into Cas’
venting session, and he didn’t mind either way.
 
“Thanks.” Cas looked over at him again and smiled. “You’re nice… You said you
used to be a prostitute?”
 
“Yeah, I worked for Crowley.”
 
“Oh... Okay. I wish I worked for Crowley, he actually treats his hookers
nicely.” Cas sighed and slumped down in his seat. “I got stuck with Abaddon.”
 
Abaddon.
 
Abaddon.
 
Why the hell was that name so damn familiar?
 
Aba- Abaddon.
 
“Wait, that redheaded bitch who mistreats people?” Dean demanded. “Shit, you
work for her?”
 
“Yeah.” Cas pouted a little. “She’s awful. She takes most of my money and…” Cas
trailed off and he glanced out the window, looking forlorn and bitter. “Well,
let’s just say, she lets bad things happen to me.”
 
“What do you mean?” Dean asked as he pulled into the garage at Cain’s
apartment. They knew his car by now and he had a parking pass via Cain.
 
“It’s not a nice thing to talk about,” Cas replied with a shrug. “Let’s just
say sometimes I say no, but things happen anyway.”
 
Dean felt his stomach twist into knots. Cas needed his help; he needed Cain’s
help. He needed someone’s help. “What if I told you I know someone who could
help you get out of the crappy situation? Someone who hates Abaddon and would
totally do this to stick it to her?”
 
“Who?” Cas asked.
 
“He lives in this building. His name is Cain.”
 
Cas’ eyes widened. “Cain Apidae? The bee guy?”
 
“Uh, yeah, sure.” Dean shrugged and nodded. “You wanna meet him?”
 
Cas nodded excitedly. “Please.”
 
“Let’s go.”
 
===============================================================================
 
 
There was so much beeping.
 
Beeping and voices and noises.
 
Claire felt her eyelids flutter as she started to wake up, only to realize her
throat felt sore and dry. When was the last time her mouth had tasted anything
wet? As her eyes adjusted she began to realize she wasn’t dead like she’d
intended - unless the afterlife was just a giant hospital.
 
“Well, good evenin’,” came a friendly voice, which was attached to an even
friendlier smile. “I’m Benny, I’m your nurse. How you feelin’, Claire?”
 
She turned her head to look for anyone in her family, but no one was there, not
even Dean. Maybe they’d just left her to rot. She didn’t exactly blame them.
“Thirsty,” she rasped.
 
“Sure, sure.” Benny nodded as he turned to pick up a paper cup, which he filled
with water, and dropped a straw into buoy around. Once the straw was placed to
her lips, she went to take it, but soon realized her arms were strapped to the
bed. She couldn’t move.
 
“What the hell?” she said after taking a drink, her voice slowly returning to
itself.
 
“It’s for your own safety,” Benny explained carefully. “You’ve been under
observation and now that you’re awake, we’ll have to put you on Suicide Watch
while you’re up here in the ICU.”
 
As she came to realize the gravity of the situation, the pain began to traipse
into her conscious mind. There were aches and stabs of pain in places she
didn’t even know she had. “Ow- fuck-.”
 
“What hurts?” Benny asked as he began to check her vitals and make notes in her
chart.
 
“Everything,” she said.
 
“Well, we got you on morphine,” he replied slowly, “But I’m not sure I can give
you more right now. I’ll have to check, alright? You did quite a number on
yourself.”
 
Claire looked away and thought back to the moments before she’d just seen red
and white. She’d been thinking about cutting her wrists and being done with it,
but anger, hurt, and rage had burst out of body and into her hands as she
stabbed her stomach over and over with the exacto knife. She’d been so angry
that she’d cut and tore and screamed, while everyone else fled the room.
 
“I remember,” she whispered. “I took an exacto knife and just… tore into
myself.”
 
“Yeah,” Benny said as he sat down on the edge of her bed. “That’s right.”
 
“I mean- it wasn’t like it was a big blade,” she said.
 
“No, but you did give yourself a lot of punctures and tears and cuts before
anyone could stop ya.” Benny reached over to wrap his large hand around hers.
“I’m glad someone did stop ya. Who knows what you would have done if they
hadn’t.”
 
“I don’t even know who did,” she admitted quietly, staring at Benny’s hand.
There were scars running along his knuckles and the veins in his hands were
large and blue. He had a man’s hands - hands that could hold a girl down and
show her a good time.
 
“I don’t know the full story, but it’s probably best you don’t either,” Benny
replied.
 
That was true.
 
If she remembered, she supposed, it could upset her further. “I don’t want to
die,” she said quickly, turning her eyes on Benny.
 
“That’s good.”
 
Dying was just too easy. She didn’t want to die and rob herself of a life she
could have - she wanted to prove Alex and everyone else at school wrong. “I
wanna make something of myself,” she said firmly, “So I can tell the kids at
school to suck it.”
 
A smile spread across Benny’s face and he took her hand to kiss her knuckles
gently. “I’m glad you feel that way, darlin’. The world would be a darker place
without ya.”
 
She smiled back and relished his attention. He was a handsome man, who had been
taking care of her. She was going to have to get his number.
 
===============================================================================
 
If Cain’s eyebrow climbed any higher on his forehead, it would belong in the
forest of hair on his head. Dean and Cas were sitting on the couch, trying to
explain Cas’ story, but Dean was not exactly doing a great job of it.
 
“So, you want me to help him,” Cain finally said, his face not giving away how
he felt inside. Not that it ever did.
 
“Right,” Dean said. “Like you helped me.”
 
Cain sighed and Dean flinched. Maybe he’d read Cain wrong, maybe he didn’t want
to help after all. “Dean, may I speak with you outside?”
 
“Uh- sure.” He nodded and tried to give Cas an encouraging smile, but he could
see that Cas didn’t look too upbeat. The smile faded as he followed Cain out
onto the balcony by the pool, which was lit up for night swimming, and the
city’s lights were flickering and there was still so much traffic going down
below them. The skyline at night was beautiful and Dean liked to be outside,
but the way Cain was looking at him - like he was angry or annoyed or tired -
didn’t bode well.
 
“Do you think I run a charity house for wayward hookers?” Cain asked, sounding
fed up. “Or do you think I am such a lonely, old man that I need company
always, in the form of young and barely legal prostitutes? Is that how you see
me?”
 
“What? No.” Dean jumped into Cain’s space and grasped onto his jacket. “No,
that’s not how I see you. Not at all.”
 
“Then why are you asking me to take in a stranger?” Cain glanced in at Cas, who
was still sitting on the couch, well behaved and not touching a damn thing. “I
don’t know this boy. The only thing I know is he works for Abaddon and he likes
bees.”
 
“He’s a fan of yours,” Dean said with a smile. “You know that- also, what’s
with the bee thing? Are you secretly into bees? Is this a kink I don’t know
about?”
 
Cain’s face went from annoyed to completely and utterly unamused. Dean gulped
and smiled nervously, hoping he could cute his way out of a fight. “I raise
bees, Dean. They are the foundation of this planet, without them, we fall, much
like Rome.”
 
“Okay, sorry- I didn’t know that.” Dean took a step back to give Cain his
personal space. “I just… I know you hate Abaddon and you guys have like a
rivalry or something… I just really want to help him. He said Abaddon lets
people rape him, Cain… Shouldn’t that make you want to help him?”
 
Cain looked beyond him and back through the windows again. “I never said I
wouldn’t help him. It just seemed sudden.”
 
“Well, in your defense, it is sudden.” Dean shrugged and smiled nervously
again. “But remember, that’s why you like me. I’m impulsive and stupid.”
 
Cain’s lips formed a thin line and Dean could tell he was truly annoyed.
Clearly, there was something wrong.
 
“What’s wrong, Daddy?” he asked shyly, taking another step closer until they
were almost pressed up against one another.
 
Cain sighed and ran a hand over his face. “Long day at work… I do not mean to
take it out on you, Dean. Or your friend.”
 
So, that’s what was wrong. Cain had had a shitty day at work and needed to
relax. Turning, Dean went back to poke his head inside. “Hey, can you come
here?”
 
Cas looked up and nodded, jumping up to join them out on the balcony. “Yeah?”
 
Dean smiled and went back to Cain, looking up at him with a devious gaze. Cain
raised his eyebrow again. “Does Daddy want some company?” he asked slowly.
 
“Dean…”
 
Cas frowned and look between them. “Are you two together?” he asked.
 
“Yeah,” Dean said quickly before Cain could answer. “We are…. and Cain’s just
stressed. He needs to relax.”
 
One glance back at Cas, he saw recognition fill pretty, blue eyes. “Oh,” Cas
said with a small smile. “I mean, I’m very good at helping men relax, Sir.”
 
“Oh, he called you Sir, isn’t that nice?” Dean asked with another smile. “So
respectful.”
 
“Yes, unlike you,” Cain replied, which made Dean blush. “Go sit down and watch
how a proper young man treats his lovers.”
 
Dean gulped and went to sit on a chair by the pool, while Cas walked up to Cain
and immediately got down on both knees to unbuckle his belt and open up his
fly. He whined when Cas had Cain’s cock out and was eagerly licking and kissing
it hard. He knew what that cock felt like in hand and he knew how Cain tasted;
it felt strange to watch someone please his lover.
 
“Mmm,” Cain slid a hand into Cas’ hair and guided him down his cock until Cas
had him all in. The sight made Dean’s jaw drop, since he was definitely not one
for deepthroating. He was going to have to practice.
 
“He’s very good,” Cain commented, his voice low and rumbly. Usually, Cain
didn’t speak or make any noise during sex, unless it was to give him direction
or say dirty things to make him whimper and writhe.
 
“Better than me?” Dean asked immediately. Was Cas better than him? Cas looked
as if he were better - the way his head moved, the way Cain’s was slowly
tipping back in pleasure, and the way his lover took in sharp breaths and how
his stomach was taut. Cas clearly knew how to work even the the most stoic of
Doms over.
 
“Very good,” Cain gasped as he groaned and Dean recognized the way he came.
 
Dean shifted in his seat.
 
Maybe this had been a mistake. If Cas were better than him in bed, then what
would stop Cain from moving on? Would Cain just leave him? He whimpered and
realized his cock was hard and needing desperate attention.
 
“Daddy,” he whined.
 
“Daddy’s working,” Cain replied as he pulled Cas up to his feet gently, slowly
taking Cas’ clothes off. “What a handsome young man you are.”
 
Cas smiled and blushed, while he dropped his eyes to the ground. He looked so
fragile and demure in the light, but Dean could see he had muscle definition.
It was weak and barely there, but Dean figured Cas used to have runner’s
muscles, before he’d turned to a life of hooking and probably starvation.
 
“I can be your boy, too,” Castiel said with a quirky smile. “I’m well behaved
and house trained.”
 
Cain chuckled as his hand wrapped around Cas’ cock, which wasn’t shaved like
Cain preferred, but even he hadn’t shaved himself yet. He liked the hair down
on his dick, it signified he was a man, damn it.
 
“May I shave you?” Cain asked. “Later, of course.”
 
Cas smiled. “Please?” he asked with Bambi eyes. “I usually do, but haven’t had
the time or the means.”
 
Dean felt his jaw clench as this clearly pleased Cain verymuch. He was slowly
starting to rub and rut against the chair, even though his jeans weren’t giving
him much stimulation. “Cain,” he said, less whiny and more angry.
 
Cain glanced over at him, his hand still idly stroking Cas’ cock. “Hm?”
 
“I asked you if he was better than me,” Dean snapped, realizing he sounded like
a bitter and jealous girlfriend.
 
“I said he was very good,” Cain replied, as if that were sufficient. “Which he
is.”
 
Cas smiled and leaned up against Cain for the attention. “So, can I stay here?
I’ll do anything- you want-oh.” He moaned so prettily as he came in long
spurts. Cain continued to guide him through it, milking his cock until it was a
dripping, soft mess.
 
“You may stay as long as you like, Cas.”
 
“Castiel,” he whispered, glancing up at Cain a bit. “My real name is Castiel.”
 
“It’s nice to meet you, Castiel.” Cain walked Cas over to sit on a chair, since
his legs were slowly turning to jelly. Dean had to admit, he made a very pretty
picture lounging across the chair, his long legs outstretched, his torso
covered in cum, and his face happy.
 
Dean’s jaw clenched and unclenched over and over - so, Cas was young, prettier,
and better than him in the sack. Great. Just great, Dean thought as he tried
not to glare at Cas too much. After all, it had been his idea to get Cas to
help Cain relax.
 
“Are you boys hungry?” Cain asked them.
 
“Yes,” Castiel said immediately. “Please.”
 
Cain turned to look at him, his hand on Cas’ head, petting idly. That made him
grind his teeth together. “Dean?”
 
“Yeah,” he growled. “I guess.”
 
“Then, come inside and help me. Castiel, you are welcome to step inside or stay
here.” Cain petted him a few more times, before heading toward the back door to
let himself back in.
 
“I’ll stay here,” he replied as he hummed and relaxed, clearly about to take a
nap.
 
Dean’s eyes narrowed in Cas’ direction, before he stomped off after Cain. While
Cain went to the kitchen, Dean went to glare and pout across from him at the
breakfast counter. It wasn’t until Cain spun around to face him, that he
realized he probably looked like a petulant two year old.
 
“My, my, isn’t that an ugly face,” Cain mused as he set some fresh bread down
to cut some slices off the loaf. “And here I was about to make you your
favorite sandwich.”
 
“You ignored me,” Dean replied angrily. “And you said he was better than me.”
 
“You both have sufficient skills in the carnal arts, Dean,” Cain replied.
 
“AKA, he’s better than me!” He threw his arms up in the air and walked over to
snatch up his coat. “Well, you know what? Fuck you, too.”
 
“Dean-.”
 
He could hear Cain coming after him, but he didn’t care. He could totally
outrun the old man - but did he want to? No, he thought. He wanted Cain to beat
him to the door. He wanted Cain to stop him and to tell him that it wasn’t true
and that he cared about him more than Cas.
 
God, Cas had been with Cain for a few minutes and he was already a jealous
housewife.
 
He was pathetic.
 
Cain’s hand wrapped around his elbow and gently turned him back around. “Dean,”
he said. “I know I am not good at being vocal in my affections for you, but I
do care about you. I don’t know Castiel very well, I only know that he has a
very gifted tongue.”
 
Dean snorted. “I’m sure he’s great, too,” he mumbled. “What if you end up
liking him more?”
 
“Somehow, I doubt I could ever like anyone more than I like you,” Cain said as
he pulled Dean so close, they were pressed up against one another. “I apologize
for making you jealous.”
 
And now Cain was apologizing for something he didn’t even fucking start. You
really are the worst, Winchester. “It’s alright, it’s not your fault. It was my
idea… I thought if you liked Cas… you know- like that, then you’d help him.
Which was wrong of me, I’m sorry.”
 
Cain’s face turned slightly sour again. “That how you see your old man? Shallow
and vain?”
 
“No!” Dean threw his arms around Cain to hug him, pressing kisses to his beard
and cheek and lips. “That’s not how I see you, not at all. I just wanted to
help.”
 
“And you did. You are a very smart and good boy.” Cain’s hands began to pet his
back and his hair. Soon, he was practically purring and wagging his
metaphorical tail. “Now, come help me make something for the two of you.”
 
He nodded. “Yes, Sir.”
 
===============================================================================
 
The ringing of his cell phone was still something he wasn’t really used to, but
after a few moments, Dean finally realized it was his phone ringing. Reaching
over, he picked up, hoping he didn’t sound like a moron. “Yeah?”
 
“Dean?”
 
His heart almost stopped when he heard a voice he hadn’t heard in awhile. Tears
filled his eyes and a smile began to turn his mouth up. “Claire?” he asked
excitedly. “That you?”
 
“Yeah,” she laughed a bit. “I got your number from Benny… He’s my nurse. Said
you left the number for when I was allowed to call, and I’m not really supposed
to be, but…”
 
“No one even told me you were awake!” Dean exclaimed, suddenly angry. “How long
have you been awake?”
 
“Not long,” she said quickly. “You weren’t here when I woke up and I didn’t
want to bother you or anyone else.”
 
“I’m sorry, Claire,” he whispered, immediately feeling guilty. Of course he
hadn’t been there when she woke up, he’d been with his lovers. Fuck, you are a
failure.“I didn’t want the kids missing too much school… and I’m sorry, I
shoulda stayed there-.”
 
“It’s okay,” she whispered. “They told me I was out for a while.”
 
He ran a hand over his face as he realized how long it had been. “Yeah,” he
said, feeling the heavy weight on his shoulders lift a little. Now that she was
awake, she’d get the help she needed, and he was going to make sure she went to
a better school.
 
“I gotta go,” she said. “I’m not even supposed to be on the phone, I’m on
suicide watch.” He could hear her rolling her eyes. “But, Benny’s risking me
calling you, so I gotta go before he gets in trouble. Okay?”
 
“Okay. I’ll come by later.”
 
“They probably won't let you, but thanks anyway.”
 
Dean rolled his eyes. “I dare them to fuckin’ try. I’ll talk to you later,
alright? I love you, Claire.”
 
There was a pause and then she said, her voice quiet and he could hear how sad
she must have felt, “I miss you and everyone.”
 
“I know,” he whispered.
 
“I’m sorry.”
 
“I know.”
 
The call ended then and Dean sighed as he slowly hung up his phone, pressing it
to his forehead. Of course, they were going to put her on suicide watch; it
made sense, but he’d be damned if they didn’t let him into see her. Glancing
over at the door, Dean ached to drive back to Cain’s, crawl into bed with him,
and not get up again for a week.
 
But, the kids would be coming home from school soon, and they needed a snack
for afterward. As he stood up, the door burst open, and he was certain he’d had
a mini heart attack. “Jesus!” he gasped as Jesse, Adam, and Sam rushed in.
“What the hell are you guys doing here? You still have school-.”
 
“There was a huge power outage, all over,” Adam said with a shrug.
 
“Did you walk home?” Dean wanted to hit them all on the backs of their heads.
They walked home often, and he didn’t like it.
 
“Yeah,” Jesse replied. “It’s nice out.”
 
He sighed. “What do you want for a snack?”
 
Sam was heading for the stairs and Adam was on his heels. They didn’t reply, so
Dean walked over to intercept them. He was tired of their attitudes; he
deserved more fucking respect than they gave.
 
“We have homework,” Sam snapped.
 
“You know what?” Dean replied angrily. “I am super fucking tired of the way you
guys treat me.”
 
“Well,” Adam said slowly. “Why would we treat you nicely when you just lie to
us all the time?”
 
“I beg your fucking pardon?” Dean growled.
 
“You’re a hooker?” Adam asked.
 
His heart dropped and he looked over at Jesse in alarm. He was staring at them
from where he was sitting backward on the couch. “I-. Who told you that?”
 
“I did,” Sam replied with a shrug. “They ought to know where your money comes
from.”
 
The way his body felt suddenly cold and achey made him wonder if his blood had
siphoned right out of his pores. His heart sank and his stomach twisted with
nausea. “I don’t do that anymore,” he replied dully, wondering if they’d even
believe him. “I clean houses.”
 
“Yeah, sure you do,” Adam snorted as he shoved past Dean and toward the stairs,
but Dean forcibly stepped in front of him. “Get outta the way, Dean.”
 
“I do clean houses,” he growled, feeling his hands clench into fists. “And so
what if I made money from men? It was good money! It kept you kids in clothes
and food!”
 
“It’s also embarrassing,” Adam replied coldly. “Like, how can we even explain
that to people?”
 
“You don’t.” He glanced over at Jesse and felt his face turn hot and red.
“Jesse, go upstairs to your room.”
 
“Why?” he asked.
 
“Because, we’re having a grown up conversation,” he replied tiredly.
 
“I know what a hooker is,” Jesse said petulantly. “Sam told me.”
 
Dean slowly turned his gaze to Sam, seething with rage. “Did he?” he growled.
 
“Yeah.”
 
“Upstairs, Jesse. Now.”
 
“Man, I never get to hear the good stuff,” Jesse whined as he stomped off
upstairs to his room. Once Dean heard the door shut, he had to keep himself
from slapping Sam across the face.
 
“You told a nine year old what a hooker is?” Dean growled.
 
“He’d hear it at school eventually,” Sam replied.
 
“I should kick your ass.” He shoved a finger in Sam’s chest, pushing him back.
“I should kick your ass until your kids come out black and blue.”
 
“Why? And be Dad? You wanna kick my ass to feel better, Dean? That what you
want?” Sam yelled. “That what you want?!”
 
Dean clenched his hands tighter until he could feel his palms ache. Adam fell
back a step, pressing himself into the corner, clearly afraid of him. He wanted
to tell them both to pack their shit and find somewhere else to live if they
didn’t like how they lived. Eventually, Dean felt the anger leave his body, as
Sam’s words continued to eat at his psyche.
 
Be like their father.
 
He didn’t want to be like John. He did everything in his power to be nothing
like John. He would rather die, than be like John.
 
Turning away, Dean walked off to the kitchen in defeat, searching for something
to make them. There were knives and chemicals all over the kitchen. How easy it
would have been to drink a bunch of bleach or stab himself in the chest. Then,
they wouldn’t have to live with him anymore; he was a monster, poison, a
fucking embarrassment.
 
He wasn’t built to be their parent.
 
Dean slid to the floor and sat still, staring at the cabinets, feeling so
exhausted. It was too hard to stand up and it was too hard to focus on anything
productive. Eventually, Dean glanced up when he felt the floor creak. Adam was
standing in the doorway, looking unsure and worried.
 
“You know,” he commented quietly, staring at the cabinets again. “I wish I
still had Dad’s gun.”
 
“Why?” Adam whispered shakily.
 
He shrugged and pressed his fingers to the side of his head like a gun. “Just…
one pull. Gone. You wouldn’t have to put up with me anymore.”
 
Adam’s face drained of color and he dashed away, calling for Sam. It hurt him
to hear Adam sound like a frightened little boy, but he didn’t have the energy
to stand up and tell him it was all fine. He couldn’t smile or relax or pretend
he was strong anymore. His body and mind were worn out; he’d been running laps
and his demons were doing jumping jacks. There wasn’t anything else he could
do.
 
“Dean?” came Sam’s voice and then Sam’s face was in front of him, looking
really afraid. “Hey… I-... Where’s your phone?”
 
“Why?” he asked quietly.
 
“Just, where is it?” Sam began to pat him down, until he found the device and
then he was searching through it like a madman. Dean shut his eyes and tried to
think if he had any pills or drugs to take; maybe he’d just go to sleep and not
get up in the morning. That would be easier on all of them, at least.
 
“I’m sorry, Sammy,” he muttered, finally opening his eyes. Sam was on the
phone, staring at him like a scared child.
 
“It’s okay, Dean-Hey… Uh- It’s Sam… Uh, could you come over? He’s… I don’t
know, he’s not himself,” Sam was saying into the phone quickly, his hand
reaching up to touch the side of Dean’s face. “Thanks.”
 
“Who was that?” Dean asked tiredly, pressing into Sam’s hand, before realizing
Sam was touching him, so he yanked out of his touch. He even shoved Sam away.
“Go away, Sam.”
 
“Dean, I’m sorry,” Sam said quickly, tears in his eyes. “I’m sorry…”
 
He laughed a little and shrugged. “You know, I think I do still have Dad’s
gun.”
 
“Hey, c’mon, don’t talk like that.” Sam went to touch him again, so he shoved
Sam back with his boot. “Dean- stop.”
 
“Fuck you, Sammy,” he growled. “You treat me like shit and then I give you what
you fucking want and you call Cain? That’s who you were talking to, right?
Cain? You hate Cain. You hate me. You wish I was dead, well, I’m ready now, I’m
ready to go. It’s my time to fucking go!”
 
With a surge of energy, Dean stood up and yanked open a drawer. It had a KIDS
OFF sticker on it, and it was technically supposed to be locked, but the lock
didn’t work very well, and the drawer came open with a few yanks. John’s gun
was just sitting there, mocking him. It was an old pistol, with a white bone
handle; there was some Latin inscribed on the side, but he didn’t remember what
it said.
 
“Dean, wait!” Sam leapt at him, slamming the drawer shut, and almost catching
Dean’s hand with it. “Don’t!”
 
The fury and anger filled him up to the breaking point. He grabbed Sam by the
front of his shirt and tossed him as hard as he could into the wall, before
taking Sam down to the floor. Holding Sam down with one hand, he used the other
to punch his brother in face. Sam’s bones cracked and blood was soon covering
Sam’s face, his knuckles, and the floor.
 
Adam was yelling at him and then there were strong arms yanking him off of Sam.
He just attempted to kick Sam instead, but someone was yanking him up and
shoving him hard up against a wall, and holding him there. For a moment, his
vision was just red, but when he came back, Dean was staring into an angry
ocean. There was a storm in Cain’s eyes and Dean gulped as his bladder came
close to just releasing itself.
 
That was not a happy glare. Cain had murder in his eyes and Dean had a feeling
he was in real trouble.
 
“Cain,” he gasped.
 
“What the hell is the matter with you?” Cain asked quietly. He pressed Dean
against the wall with one hand, while he turned to look at Sam. “Is he
alright?”
 
Dean gulped again and he looked over Cain’s shoulder at where Adam was helping
Sam sit up. His face was a swollen mess, blood running down his neck and into
his shirt. Tears formed in his eyes at the sight.
 
“Yeah,” Adam said, “I mean no, but he’s… he’ll be okay. Right, Sam?”
 
“Yeah,” Sam replied, glancing up at them. Dean could feel his lip tremble at
how small and young Sam looked; he’d put that fear into Sam. He’d done that.
 
“Good,” Cain replied and then those angry eyes were back on him. Dean could
feel his dick and balls trying to climb back inside his body as Cain glared. “I
am going to take your brother to the urgent care so he can be looked over. You
are going to come with us and behave yourself.”
 
“Yes, Sir,” he muttered.
 
Cain slowly released him and pointed to the door. Dean began to shuffle out,
his head ducked low, feeling real shame fill his core. He hadn’t meant to hurt
Sam; he never wanted to hurt Sam again. God, he really did deserve to be put
six feet under.
 
Jesse was standing at the stairs, the front of his pants wet, and Dean felt his
heart shatter. “Jesse,” he said, reaching for him, but Jesse jumped back,
hiding behind the banister. Tears filled his eyes, mimicking Jesse’s as they
watered. “I’m sorry,” he said.
 
Cain continued to usher them out the door and Dean glanced back as Cain knelt
down to coax Jesse out, clearly trying to calm him. Dean went to stand by
Cain’s car, staring at the ground, wondering if he could honestly get away with
taking pills later. Of course, while Cain sat on him, he couldn’t.
 
Sam was set in the front with Cain, while Dean was put all the way in the back,
practically in the trunk, while Adam and Jesse sat in the middle. He turned his
eyes on the window and watched the house disappear as they drove away. The
walls returned and Dean shut down. It was easier than feeling, that was for
sure.
 
===============================================================================
  
“It was my fault,” Sam told Cain as they sat together in the room he’d been put
in. He’d asked Cain to sit with him, which had made him feel like a child, but
it was better than sitting alone to wait on a doctor to fix him up.
 
“Dean is an adult,” Cain replied. “He should know better.”
 
Sam shrugged. “I pushed him too far,” he whispered. “But I was afraid- He kept
talking about Dad’s gun… and that fucking gun was in that drawer and I just- I
had to stop him.” Tears filled his eyes and they began to fall freely.
 
The idea of Dean killing himself was so goddamn humbling. It was all his fault;
he’d mocked Dean, pushed Dean too far, given up Dean’s secrets, treated Dean
worse than he’d treat his enemies. It hadn’t been fair or right, the way he’d
treated Dean. It was only fair Dean took a few swings.
 
“Sam,” Cain said heavily, making him look up at him. “Your life has been full
of hurdles and horrors… You are a very strong, young man. You’ve put up with
more than someone your age should. I am not saying you haven’t done wrong,
everyone does bad things, everyone says things they regret.”
 
Sam gulped and nodded, glancing back down again. The tears were slipping off of
his face and dampening the crinkly paper he was situated on. “But?” he
whispered.
 
“That being said,” Cain continued, “You should have been told the truth, about
your brother, about me. I understand he wanted to keep it a secret, and I can
understand with such young children in his care, but he shouldn’t have kept it
all a secret. You both have done right and wrong by each other. Dean is a very
weary and tired young man… He’s twenty six and looks thirty six. He needs a
break, it is easy to see that, and if he’ll let me, I will make your lives
easier.”
 
“Why?” Sam asked. “Why us? Why?”
 
“I care about your brother, Sam, and because I care about your brother, I care
about you.” Cain stood and walked over to tilt his chin up a little. “You’ve
seen enough horror in your life. I’ve been looking around, at homes, something
bigger than what you own now, in a better area. If Dean allows it, it can be
yours.”
 
Sam knew if his face hadn’t been a swollen mess, he would have looked
completely stunned. Maybe he still did, he couldn’t be sure. “A new house?” he
whispered.
 
Cain nodded. “It even has a yard, big enough to own a dog or two? Hm?”
 
Damn, Cain knew him better than he’d thought. “But, how can we pay for it?”
 
“I would pay for it,” Cain replied with a shrug. “I own several properties. I’m
sure your brother won’t accept such a large gift, so I’ll tell him he can rent
it from me instead.”
 
The tears were coming faster now and it just sounded so easy. With a snap of
his fingers, Cain could make their lives better. What had they even done to
deserve such an easy fix? “We don’t deserve that,” he sobbed.
 
“I think you do,” Cain countered. “I believe you do. All of you.”
 
“Will you help Dean get help?” he asked, not wanting to talk about houses
anymore. All he wanted, was for Dean to get help for his mental wounds.
“Please?”
 
“I can only do so much,” Cain replied quietly. “But I will talk to him.”
 
Sam nodded and then the doctor was knocking and walking in. He sighed and
prepared himself to ask a bunch of questions; he’d already thought up a story.
He just hoped they didn’t care too much about how he’d ended up a bleeding and
swollen mess. The last thing they needed was for social workers to take them
away from Dean and split them all up in foster care.
 
Cain sat and Sam began to fantasize about have a new house. Something bigger,
better, newer. A place that Dean could still keep clean and up to par, but
something where Dean could have his own bedroom and not live in a closet. He
could have a dog (or two) and Jesse could have a yard to play in. Maybe they’d
have a real kitchen and a real TV in a real living room. The carpet would be
clean and soft.
 
It sounded too good to be true.
 
===============================================================================
 
 
After their visit to the urgent care, Cain drove them out to a nice side of
town, where the suburbs turned from boarded up houses to cookie cutter models
that looked nice and pristine. They ended up pulling up in front of a house
with two stories and two garage doors. There was a paved driveway and a fancy
mailbox. The house even had a porch with a large bay window front and center.
When they walked in, Dean felt too impure and dirty to step into something so
new and nice.
 
It even smelled like fresh paint and the carpet was fucking cream colored; not
dirty with brown stains. Adam was rushing up the steps with Jesse and they were
cackling over the loft. It looked down on the living room and Sam was heading
in to admire the high ceilings. Dean stood in the doorway, not letting himself
cross the threshold. He didn’t belong here.
 
“Dean,” Cain said, gently pressing against his back to get him to walk over the
threshold and into the house.
 
“Why are we here?” he asked tiredly.
 
“Whoa, there’s a bunch of rooms up here!” Adam called. Dean flinched at how
happy he sounded. Why would Cain bring them to a place they could never have?
 
Cain placed a hand on his lower back and produced a set of house keys. “These
are yours,” he said quietly.
 
His heart jumped a few beats, making his chest ache. “What?” he gasped, turning
with alarm. “This is too much- you can’t. No.” He shook his head. Phones were
one thing, but a house?
 
“It can be yours,” Cain corrected. “If you want it to be. You can rent it, of
course.”
 
Dean stammered a few times. “But- I can’t afford rent on this. There’s no way-
or the bills- the electric or the heat-.”
 
“You told me that it would be alright for me to take care of you, Dean,” Cain
said. “Taking care of you, also means taking care of your family. I think it is
time you have something nice. Something you can keep and call yours. Something
to come home to.”
 
“But the kids have school- I can’t just switch them out now.” Dean stared up at
Cain in fear. This was too much, it was too fast and too much. “I can’t say yes
to this.”
 
“Why not?” Adam asked, making him startle. “I wanna live here. Jesse and I
already picked out our rooms. We’re letting Claire have the one with the
bathroom, because she so deserves her own bathroom.”
 
Tears made his eyes feel hot and his vision began to swim. “Because, I can’t
afford this place,” he replied. “I’m a failure and I can’t afford this.”
 
“You’re not a failure, Dean,” Cain muttered in his ear.
 
“I am!” he yelled back, pulling away to go and let himself into the nearest
room, which happened to be the pitch black garage. It was a lot cooler and it
was so dark, he couldn’t even see a hand in front of his face. He almost
tripped down the two steps, but eventually found himself standing on cold
concrete. His boots were so worn out, the cold ran up his legs in painful
stabs.
 
However, he hadn’t thought to lock the door, so he heard it open and then a
light was flooding the entire room. The garage was huge, and would easily fit
Baby inside. “I’m a failure,” he whispered, staring at the garage door.
 
He felt Cain’s hand go to the back of his head and he wanted to collapse.
“You’re not a failure,” Cain said quietly. “You’ve had a cruel and difficult
hand dealt to you, Dean, but you're not a failure. You’ve given up your life
for your siblings, and I know you’re tired.”
 
He was tired; he was plain fucking exhausted. Getting up was difficult and
staying awake was even more difficult. “I hate myself, Cain.”
 
“I know, Dean.” Cain wrapped his arms around him and Dean relaxed back against
his chest. “Let me help you. Let me carry some of your weight. You can’t do it
alone.”
 
“Nothing should be this easy,” he said. “I wanna pay for the house. I got a
bunch of cash saved up, I can use it to put a payment down on it, just like
normal people do.”
 
“That cash is yours,” Cain replied. “I won’t accept a large sum. If you want,
you can pay what you do pay now, every month.”
 
“That ain’t enough,” he whined. “My rent’s dirt cheap, I know that.”
 
“I will not ask you to break your back to pay for this,” Cain replied, pressing
a kiss to Dean’s temple.
 
“But what about the stuff that comes with this house? Taxes and-and utilities.
I can’t afford those things- Not on something this nice…” It hurt to remember
how poor he was without Cain. When he’d been a hooker, he’d at least been able
to break even.
 
“I will pay for them,” Cain replied quietly. “The house is in my name, so the
bills come to me.”
 
Dean wanted to sob and collapse on the floor, and he probably would have, if
Cain hadn’t been holding him upright. “I can’t repay you,” he whispered.
 
“You don’t have to, Dean. Not everything comes with strings attached.”
 
He shuddered and pressed his palms to his eyes to keep from crying more. “I
know you’re mad at me… for what I did to Sam. If it makes you feel better, I’m
more mad at me.”
 
“I’m more upset that I haven’t insisted you get some help before this.”
 
“Can’t afford that kinda shit.” Dean shrugged. “It’s not like a I got health
insurance.”
 
“You need help, Dean. Do you want to be around for them?”
 
“No,” he spat. “They don’t want me. They don’t even need me. They got you.”
 
“They need you,” Cain insisted.
 
He shook his head, completely unbelieving. They didn’t need a failure like him.
They needed someone who could take care of them without being a fucky pussy
about it. Someone who was strong, confident, and hda money. They needed Cain.
 
“How’s Cas?” he asked, feeling drained and ready to jump off into the void.
 
“He’s well,” Cain replied. “He says he hopes you are alright and he hopes you
come to visit again soon.”
 
Dean snorted. “I’m sure you two get along real well.” He couldn’t help but feel
jealous; Cas got to have twenty-four hour access to Cain and he only got Cain
when he had time to visit or Cain visited him.
 
“We do,” Cain replied, “but that doesn’t mean I do not miss you.”
 
He shrugged. “Cas is prettier than me.”
 
“And why does that matter?”
 
“I dunno.”
 
“Hey, Dean,” came Adam’s voice, making him startle again in Cain’s arms. “So,
um, is this our house now? Because, we counted the rooms, and there’s four
bedrooms. Three bathrooms. There’s like a big master with a huge bathroom with
a big tub, it’s awesome, and um… We figured that could be your room. And Sam
and I can share, since Sam’s gonna live in California anyway, and then Jesse
and Claire can have their own rooms.”
 
“I thought Claire was getting the room with the bathroom,” Dean replied
quietly.
 
“Well, we talked it over, and I’m sure she won’t mind letting you have it…”
 
He snorted. “I don’t need my own room. You kids should have your own rooms.”
 
“But-.”
 
Cain gave him a squeeze, but he pulled away and began to walk back into the
house. “I don’t need my own room, alright?”
 
“But you deserve it,” Adam said quickly.
 
He wanted to spin around and yell at Adam, to tell him how he was a failure and
he was everything a parent shouldn’t be. But, he kept that to himself and just
kept walking until he found himself looking out the sliding glass door in the
back. A real sliding glass door; it was a luxury he’d only been able to dream
of. There was a tall fence and a large backyard and, Dean was fairly certain,
that was a fucking pool also in the back.
 
“Dean,” Cain said as he went to join him, his hand pressing into his lower
back. “Adam is right, you know.”
 
“Nah,” he said with a shake of his head.
 
“This is why I believe you need help.”
 
“Why?”
 
Cain sighed, rubbing his back in small circles. “Because you believe you don’t
deserve your own room, because you’re exhausted, because you think they don’t
need you. They love you and they need you.”
 
“They got a funny way of showin’ it,” he growled. He was bitter, that much was
easy to tell, but he didn’t want to be. The kids were just kids; they weren’t
perfect, and God knew he wasn’t either. None of them were.
 
“Everyone is stressed and tired and needing a break,” Cain said slowly. “Dean,
I know you don’t like charity and I know you don’t like to ask for help, but
I’m going to tell you to think of Adam, Claire, Sam, and Jesse-.”
 
“I always think of them!” He spun around and glared at Cain. “Don’t you fucking
insinuate that I don’t.”
 
Dean turned his eyes on where Jesse, Sam, and Adam were all standing. He didn’t
like seeing Sam so beat up and he didn’t like to see Jesse so afraid and he
didn’t like to see Adam so fucking lost. He turned away again, pressing his
forehead to the glass.
 
“I know you do,” Cain whispered to him.
 
Dean took a deep breath and slowly let his shoulders relax. “Okay,” he said.
“We’ll take the house.”
 
“Really?” Adam asked.
 
“Yeah,” he sighed.
 
“Hear that Jesse, we’re gonna have this awesome house!”

Dean shut his eyes and silently wished someone would come along and blow him
away. It would be easier on all of them in the long run.
 
***** Chapter 7 *****
Claire came home three weeks after she was admitted to the hospital. By the
time she was able to come home, they’d already moved to the new house and
started to settle in. Dean was still distant, Sam was just as bad, and Jesse
played alone in his room.
 
He didn’t like feeling like the only member of the family who still wanted to
engage as a family. Adam had grown up with his mom and John had been a good dad
to him for a while; he’d taken him to a baseball game and had shown him how to
tie sailor knots and other weird nature things. But then, his mother had died
and John had turned into a drunk, which had left him without a family for a
while. Until, he’d found John and Dean; Dean had taken him in, and even though
at first he’d resisted their family dynamic, he’d grown to like the
Winchesters.
 
He liked Dean. He liked Sam and Claire and Jesse. They were a good bunch,
broken, but good. But with everyone so quiet and distant and staying in their
corners of the house, Adam found himself spending more and more time with
Michael. He gave Michael head during lunch, he let Michael fuck him after
school, and a lot of the time he snuck out at night to make his way to
Michael’s house now that lived on the same side of town.
 
In fact, he was sitting in Michael’s living room while Michael made them
dinner. He liked Michael’s TV because it was big and he had every channel
imaginable. He’d been watching porn most of the day, since he couldn’t just
watch porn at home. He was hoping Cain would start buying them gifts too, like
computers and tablets and the things they’d gone without for years.
 
Not that he didn’t like the cellphone, because it was definitely awesome. He
could text his friends, surf the internet, play games, listen to music; it was
everything he’d ever wanted. Except, it wasn’t a laptop and while he didn’t
mind sharing Sam’s, it would be so much better if they could all have their
own.
 
“Bon appetit,” Michael said as he appeared with two plates full of some type of
pasta dish in hand. “Looks good, right?”
 
Adam nodded as he accepted the dish and eagerly began to spoon it into his
mouth, despite how hot it was. “Fuck-.”
 
“Slow down,” Michael laughed as he sat to blow on his fork. “Don’t want you
burning your tongue.”
 
“Shorry,” he said around his too hot mouthful, trying to get it all down.
“Didn’t mean to, itsh justh gooth.”
 
Michael chuckled and handed him a glass of wine. He drank wine now, because
Michael was sophisticated, and he wanted a glass too. At first, he hadn’t liked
it, but then they’d ended up tipsy together, which had led to making out, which
led to sex, which led to cuddling. It was a good time all around.
 
“Thanks for letting me stay over,” he said after he finished his first sip.
 
“You’re always welcome,” Michael replied with a smile. “I like having you
here.”
 
“Well, I like being here. Better than being at home.” Adam rolled his eyes and
stuffed more pasta into his mouth. He didn’t talk about his home life to
anyone, especially not Michael, but it was all coming out.
 
“Why don’t you like being at home?” Michael asked, suddenly curious. Mr. Stoic
and Reserved was suddenly interested in his life.
 
“Because it sucks,” he spat angrily. “Dean’s all cold and Sam’s all quiet and
Jesse just plays by himself and poor Claire hasno idea what she came home to.
It all just sucks. It’s our fault, too… It’s our fault Dean’s this way and I
hate it.”
 
Michael set aside his dinner to focus on him fully. “I’m sorry,” he said, and
he actually sounded apologetic. “Can I do anything for you?”
 
Adam shrugged. “I dunno,” he muttered. “Probably not. Just you letting me be
here is good.”
 
“Alright.”
 
When some girl began to moan Daddyover and over again, it was then Adam
remembered he’d been watching porn. He blushed and jumped to change the
channel, which made Michael laugh. “Shut up,” he muttered, his cheeks red hot.
 
“Hey, nothing wrong with porn,” Michael said with a shrug. “I watch it all the
time.”
 
“What’s your favorite kind to watch?” Adam asked, his hand on the remote, but
he hadn’t yet changed the channel.
 
“I’m pretty open,” Michael replied. “I’m good with anything, as long as someone
comes.”
 
Adam smiled and left the stupid movie on, still shoveling pasta into his mouth,
until his fork scraped the plate and there was nothing left. “I wanna do that,”
he said with a smile.
 
Michael smirked. “You want to, huh?”
 
“Please?”
 
“That requires you to be naked, now doesn’t it?”
 
Adam felt a blush run up the back of his neck as he began to strip out of his
clothes, until he was down to his boxers. Michael watched him as he stood and
slid the underwear down to reveal his butt. He playfully bent over to show his
hole as the boxers slid all the way down to the floor and he stepped out of
them, tossing them away from the couch.
 
“Lovely,” Michael commented as Adam used the coffee table to stay bent over.
“What a nice boy.”
 
Adam sighed, keeping his ass up for Michael to tease, which he did. Michael’s
fingers rubbed along his cheeks and then to the sensitive skin between his hole
and balls. A whine escaped his throat and he pressed his forehead to the table
top. God, Michael knew how to make him come so fast.
 
“Already going to come, hm?” Michael asked as he began to rub his rim, teasing
it but not bothering to slide a finger in. They’d need more lube for that. “I
bet I can make you come untouched.”
 
Adam blushed and braced his knees on the table, easing his lower half back to
the floor. “I hate you,” he panted.
 
Michael chuckled. “No you don’t.”
 
“Make me come, old man.”
 
“If you keep being impatient, I’ll make you wait longer,” Michael replied
haughtily.
 
Adam whined in response. He didn’t want to wait, he wanted to come now. “F-fuck
you,” he managed to spit out, even as his lips and voice trembled with
anticipation.
 
Michael laughed loudly and spanked his hole, making Adam jump and grit his
teeth. “No back talk.”
 
“What are you gonna do about it?” he snapped back, which only caused Adam to
spank him hard across the ass. He cried out and felt tears burn his eyes.
“Shit-.”
 
“Keep back talking, and see where it gets you,” Michael said, his voice low and
dark. It made a shiver run up and down his spine.
 
“You gonna p-punish me?” he panted.
 
Michael’s fingers rubbed against his hole and then Adam gasped as the flat of
his hand cracked hard down on his ass again. Clearly, Michael was in a
disciplining mood, which Adam didn’t mind at all. He liked to be punished and
he liked to be used. It was his favorite.
 
“You’re a little shit,” Michael snarled, spanking him again, making his ass
bright red. “Always a pain in my ass in class, especially.”
 
Adam moaned and clung to the table, feeling his legs sag slightly. Three more
smacks and there was real pain starting to tingle in his spine and cheeks. But,
he could take it. He totally could take it; plus, he deserved it.
 
Four more and he was crying.
 
Six more after that and he was starting to feel sick.
 
That was when Michael finally stopped. “Adam,” he said, his voice low and
concerned. “Tell me if you’re in real pain.”
 
He shook his head, even though his skin was covered in a sheen of sweat and he
was feeling nauseous. “I-I’m fine,” he hissed. “Do it again.”
 
“No,” Michael said quietly.
 
Strong arms wrapped around his waist and helped him sit up, even though it made
him feel worse. “I’m gonna puke-.”
 
“Breathe, breathe and lay down.” Michael helped him lie on his stomach on the
couch cushions. “I’m going to get you some water.”
 
He nodded, shutting his eyes, and bracing through the agony. How he was going
to sit in class tomorrow as beyond his imagination. Sneaking out on a Sunday
night had been a dumb idea. Quiet clingings and the sink running were the
things he focused on, to keep himself from wanting to throw up. He used the
couch to soak up some tears as they squeezed out, despite him not wanting them
to.
 
“Here you are,” Michael said as he knelt down to help Adam sit up enough to sip
some water. He also produced a wet rag, which he began to use to rub Adam’s
back, shoulders, and then rest along the back of his neck. “Feel better?”
 
“A little,” he admitted as the cool rag helped make him feel less hot. “I’m
sorry- I thought I could do it- I deservemore pain.”
 
“No you don’t,” Michael said firmly. “I shouldn’t have done that- it was my
fault. I should know where to draw the line.”
 
He sighed and shut his eyes, feeling suddenly exhausted. “I’m sleepy,” he
muttered.
 
“Okay,” Michael replied. “Just sleep and rest.”
 
Adam nodded and then he was asleep faster than he’d ever been before.
 
===============================================================================
 
Going to school felt wrong, what with Claire being home and Dean being a shadow
of himself, but Sam went because he knew Stanford wouldn’t understand his
personal problems. They only understood test scores and how good he was at
writing essays. Besides school feeling wrong, Sam noticed that Ruby and Anna
were being weird.
 
Especially Anna.
 
The way she acted around him as if she knew something he didn’t and things
weren’t quite the same anymore. He decided to confront her between classes
before lunch.
 
“Anna,” he said as he walked up to her locker, making her jump and look at him
like a scared rabbit. “What’s going on with you?”
 
“Nothing,” she said quickly.
 
“That’s crap and you know it. Something’s bugging you and you won’t tell me
what… It’s like you wanna hide something from me. You and Ruby both.”
 
“I’m not hiding anything,” she said angrily, just as Ruby came up to both of
them.
 
“Hey whores, what’s up?” she asked, her eyes turning to him pointedly. “You
bugging Anna, Winchester?”
 
Sam frowned and shook his head. “No, I just want to know what you guys are
hiding from me.”
 
Ruby groaned and rolled her eyes. “Nothing. Gosh, why so paranoid?”
 
“You’ve been acting weird,” he pointed out.
 
Ruby rolled her eyes again and wrapped her arm around Anna’s shoulders. “Look,
Sam, no offense, but your whole family has been having this huge amount of
drama, so yeah, we’ve been tiptoeing around you… But only so we don’t upset you
on accident or something.”
 
Anna nodded a little, but Sam wasn’t convinced. Not with the way Anna kept
looking at Ruby with fear in her eyes. “It’s true,” she added quickly.
 
“So, you’re not still mad at me,” Sam said slowly.
 
“I already told you I forgave you for that, jeeze.” Ruby shook her head and
gestured that they should keep walking down the hall. “You coming?”
 
“Yeah,” he said slowly as they headed down the hall together. “Sorry for all
the drama.”
 
“It’s not your fault,” Ruby replied. “It’s everyone else’s fault. Like, those
assholes all picking on Claire? What the fuck. If she’d told me, I would have
beat the fuck out all of them.”
 
Sam smiled a little. Ruby was still Ruby, Anna was just being weird. Maybe she
was just nervous about their midterms coming up and Christmas and all of that
other crap.
 
“Hey, you coming to the Halloween party next Friday?” Ruby asked him suddenly.
 
Sam blinked and realized he’d completely forgotten it was almost Halloween.
Dean’s favorite holiday and his least favorite. It was a stupid holiday that
never brought him joy as a kid. It sure as hell didn’t bring him joy now
either. Especially since Dean would probably be putting up stupid decorations
and buying a silly costume… or at least, he hoped Dean would be in the spirit
enough to do those things.
 
“Helloooo, Sam?” Ruby snapped her fingers in front of his nose a few times.
 
“Sorry,” he said with a blush. “I was just thinking about how I actually hope
Dean is in the mood to be all cheesy on Halloween.”
 
“Wow,” Ruby said as her eyebrows went up. “Man, he must be really bad if you’re
wanting him to play Monster Mash thirty times and dress up like Count Dracula.”
 
“I know,” Sam muttered with a sigh. “He is really bad… but, uh, yeah I guess I
can go to the party next weekend. As long as you don’t expect me to dress up.”
 
“Sorry, costumes are required,” Ruby said. “Right, Anna?”
 
Anna nodded. “Right,” she muttered.
 
Sam frowned, still wondering why she seemed so nervous, like a scared animal.
“Anna, are you sure you’re okay?” he asked.
 
“It’s just her nerves,” Ruby replied with a wave of her hand as they paid for
their lunches. “Exams and all that crap, all piling up.”
 
“Right,” Anna agreed.
 
Sam frowned, but he followed them anyway. “Is the party at your house, Ruby?”
 
She grinned from ear to ear. “Oh, you know it.”
 
“I’ll be there.”
 
“Perfect.”
 
===============================================================================
  
The hospital felt different now that she was visiting as someone who wasn’t a
patient. She was able to walk through the front doors of her volition and not
as someone who was on a stretcher and needing emergency surgery. She took the
elevator up to where she’d been in the ICU and let herself in through the
doors.
 
It was 3:30PM on Monday afternoon, which meant Benny would be at the desk.
Putting a smile on, she walked on up to where he was sitting behind a computer,
typing busily. “Hey,” she said, hoping he’d at least look up to see her.
 
Benny glanced up and slowly a smile began to appear on his face. “Well, if it
ain’t a girl I don’t wanna see again up here,” he said with a fake stern voice
as he stood up to walk around and hug her. “How you doin’?”
 
“I’m okay,” she admitted as she hugged him back. “I just wanted to stop by and
see you.”
 
“You back in school?” he asked as he began to walk her back out of the wing
toward the hall with the elevators. Probably so they didn’t disturb the other
patients, she figured.
 
“Yeah,” she said with a sigh. “It sucks, but we got a new house, it’s really
nice. Because of Dean’s… boyfriend or whatever.” She shrugged and looked up at
him with another smile. “So, I didn’t just come here to like say hey.”
 
“Yeah?” Benny leaned against the wall, arms folded. “I figured as much. What is
it you want?”
 
“Well, I was thinking, since you helped me so much here… I could maybe get a
number to call you- you know. In case, I want to talk to you or something.” She
shrugged and tried to play it as smoothly as she could. Men were stupid anyway,
she figured he’d fall for it without a hitch.
 
“My number?” he repeated back at her, his eyebrows raising. “You think that’s
appropriate?”
 
“It’s not like we’re calling each other all the time, I think it’d just be nice
to know that I could call you.” Claire looked up at him and tried to look as
sad and innocent as possible. “Please?”
 
Benny glanced all around the room before nodding and plucking a pen from his
pocket to write it on her palm. “Now, you call when you need to, but know that
I am workin’ most of the time.”
 
“I got it.” She smiled at the number written in her skin. He didn’t have the
nicest handwriting, but she could still make it out. “Thanks, Benny.”
 
“Don’t go tellin’ people either,” he said. “I don’t wanna lose my license or
somethin’.”
 
She nodded seriously. “I won’t, I swear. Thanks.” Throwing her arms around him
in a quick hug, Claire dashed back over to the elevators and once inside, she
put Benny’s number into her phone in a hurry. Once she was back outside, Claire
took her time in walking back to the bus stop, glad that the new house allowed
her to ride the old people bus, which meant she didn’t have to see homeless men
masturbating or have other men verbally harass her for blowjobs.
 
She took a seat at the shelter and debated on what to text Benny first. Duh,
tell him it’s you.
 
-hey benny it’s claire :-) hope you have a good day
 
She didn’t expect to hear back, but then her phone buzzed and she glanced down
with a huge smile.
 
-glad to know you’re ok :) stay strong, claire
 
-i will! thank you so much for being my friend at the hospital, you made it
less scary. i owe you <3
 
-you don’t owe me nothin
 
Claire felt her heart soar as she glanced up to see the bus pull up in front of
the shelter. She even smiled at the driver and sat up front, hoping Benny would
keep texting her if she kept texting him. He was perfect; not only was he hot,
but he was nice and she knew he could cook, because she’d heard other nurses
bragging about how good his jambalaya tasted.
 
- i heard you make good jambalaya is that true?
 
-haha was Angie talkin about me again? i’m alright
 
-i just heard some nurses saying you make good food
 
-well, maybe i’ll cook for you sometime. invite you and your family over
 
Claire rolled her eyes and glowered at her phone. She didn’t want Dean & Co. to
go see Benny, too. Dean would just tell her Benny was too old for her (like he
could even talk), and the boys would just be embarrassing her the whole time.
 
-i doubt they’d want to come, but i would!
 
-well, idk how Andrea would feel about that, but maybe
 
-who’s that?
 
Claire frowned as she stared at the name of some unknown woman: Andrea. Who the
hell was Andrea and why hadn’t she heard her name before?
 
-my wife
 
Wife.
Benny was married?
 
She’d never seen a ring on his finger. A mixture of disappointment and rage
made her stomach hurt and she glared at her phone like it was the reason to
blame. Why did the man she figured would treat her right and good have to be
fucking married? Why did she get nothing good in her life?
 
-oh
 
That was all she could say as they reached her stop and was walking off the bus
and off toward their new housing development. It felt strange to live in a
place called Ocean Cliffs, since there was not an ocean around them and they
were now a part of the white, suburban, cookie-cutter housing people. It was
almost too cliche, but the house was nice and large enough to fit them all,
plus company, comfortably.
 
She came to their street, which was called Anchor Avenue, and made her way to
the house, which dark inside from what she could see. When she let herself into
the house, it was just as quiet on the inside as it looked on the outside. The
only audible sound being the muffled TV from the living room, where Jesse was
probably watching cartoons.
 
She glanced up the staircase to strain her ears and listen for signs of life,
but gave up, instead walking down the hall to find Jesse, Sam, and Adam all
piled on the new couch that had been bought for the house. In fact, all of
their furniture and stuff was new; Cain had taken them on a shopping trip. All
except Dean; he’d stayed in his room.
 
“Hey,” she said slowly as her backpack slipped to the floor. “What’s up?”
 
“Hey, Claire,” Adam said, his eyes still glued to the TV. None of them made a
move to do anything other than watch the cartoon.
 
“Where’s Dean?” she asked.
 
“Where do you think?” Adam replied.
 
She felt her shoulders slump and before she could think about it twice, Claire
found herself going upstairs to knock on the master bedroom’s door. There was
no noise or sound coming from the other side, so she pushed the door open to at
least check on him. Dean’s room was mostly empty, save for the bed Cain had
bought for him and a dresser.
 
There was a Dean sized lump under a few blankets, and Claire gingerly walked
over to sink down on the floor next to him. “Dean?”
 
Dean’s eyes slowly opened and she saw they were dead and empty inside. He
didn’t look like the Dean she knew and not just because he needed to shave.
 
“Are you okay?” she whispered, but he didn’t reply. “We should go out tonight.
Go bowling or something fun.”
 
“Tired,” Dean muttered.
 
“Well, it’d be a good way to get up and moving, yeah? You’ll feel better if you
eat or do something physical.”
 
“Tired.”
 
She sighed and felt tears fill her eyes. “I know,” she whispered brokenly
before leaning up to kiss his cheek and forehead. The tears fell faster the
more she thought on how empty and sad Dean must be feeling, but before she
could sob all over him, she fled his room and rushed to her own.
 
The door shut firmly behind, Claire dug out her phone and scrolled through the
contacts to find the number. It rang twice before he answered. “You need to
come over,” she said shakily. “Please.”
 
“I’m going to Dean’s, I hope you don’t mind.”
 
Castiel glanced up slowly from his book to see Cain standing near the door,
coat on, clearly ready to leave. He wanted to pout and glare, because of course
Cain was running off to be with Dean. It wasn’t surprising in the slightest.
 
“You’re upset,” Cain said, as if he could read minds, and maybe he could.
Castiel wouldn’t put it past him.
 
“Well, you’re always with Dean,” Castiel whined. “I like Dean. How come I don’t
get invited to be with Dean?”
 
“Because Dean’s family is not aware of you,” Cain replied slowly. “Per Dean’s
request.”
 
He rolled his eyes and glared back down on his book. Being a dirty little
secret had not been what he’d wanted. “Oh.”
 
“I will make it up to you.”
 
“Whatever. Can I order food, then?”
 
“Yes.”
 
“Cool.” Castiel set his book aside and stood to walk over to grab the apartment
phone. He’d thought it strange that Cain still had a landline, but he supposed
the old man was old fashioned. “Bye.”
 
“Goodbye, Castiel.”
 
He listened to the door opening and closing, before picking up the phone to
order a pizza, breadsticks, dessert, and a drink. If Cain was going to leave
him for the evening, he was going to put a dent in his credit card. It was only
fair. He hadn’t even been with Cain that long, but he felt comfortable around
him. Cain made sure he was happy, except for when he ran off to be with Dean,
which was too often in Cas’ opinion.
 
Sharing wasn’t even the problem; Dean had come first, so he didn’t mind that
Dean wanted to be with Cain. Sharing was caring, in Castiel’s mind, but Dean
clearly didn’t want to share. That was the problem.
 
Part of him wondered if he should leave Cain behind and find someone else, but
if he left Cain’s protection, he would have to deal with Abaddon and he didn’t
want to deal with Abaddon. She’d not come looking for him, yet, but Cain was
ready to deal with her when she did. If she did; he could be replaced easily
and it wasn’t as if Cain was selling his body on the street in competition.
 
Castiel huffed and went to sit on the couch and glare at the TV.
 
At least Cain had almost every channel and he could buy whatever movie he
wanted off of the pay-per-view. As long as he didn’t abuse the privilege, which
he didn’t, since he wouldn’t dare bite the hand that fed him. But that didn’t
mean he wasn’t lonely.
 
Castiel sighed and stared angrily at the television, waiting for his pizza.
Maybe he would go out after the pizza and enjoy himself. Hook up with someone.
Better than spending the night alone.
 
===============================================================================
 
Dean shuddered awake when he felt the blanket being pulled off of his body.
Rolling back a little, Dean looked up to see Cain standing over him. “What?” he
gasped, his voice hoarse from lack of use.
 
“You should get up,” Cain said, even reaching to help him sit up. It was slow,
but eventually he was able to do it. “Good.”
 
Dean frowned and looked up at Cain, wondering who had called him. “What are you
doing here?”
 
“Claire called me. She was upset. She said I needed to come over to see you.”
 
Dean flinched and rubbed his jaw; it was full of hair and God did he need to
shave. When was the last time he’d shaved? Hell, when was the last time he’d
showered? “Sorry about that,” he muttered. “Kids can’t mind their own damn
business.”
 
“Come on,” Cain replied, one hand on his arm and the other around his shoulders
to help him up out of bed. “Let’s get you into the bath. The kids want to go
bowling, I told them we could go, but that includes you.”
 
Dean frowned and he felt a protest rise behind his lips, but he held his
tongue. If Cain said the kids could go, including him, then they would go hell
or high water. “I don’t wanna go out,” he mumbled as Cain began to strip him of
his old clothes. As soon as he was naked, he felt a blush fill his face and
travel down to his navel; when was the last time he’d been naked in front of
the old man?
 
“You’ve lost weight,” Cain commented. Dean glanced up at Cain’s face and saw
that his brows were together, but not in anger, he looked concerned.
 
“I haven’t been hungry.”
 
“Well, you need to eat.” Cain cupped his face and Dean eagerly pressed back
into his touch.
 
“I’m sorry,” he whispered shakily, before launching and pressing himself into
Cain’s arms. His own wrapped around Cain’s upper body as tightly as he could
make them. He clung to Cain like a lifeline, because God knew he needed it.
 
“Shhh,” Cain muttered, his hands reaching up to pet the back of his head.
“You’re standing up, you’re here. That’s better than being back in bed. Now,
let’s get you cleaned up, dressed in clean clothes, and then we can go out,
alright?”
 
He nodded tiredly, but he had no desire to pull away from Cain. Holding on for
longer than necessary, Dean eventually disentangled himself so Cain could start
up the bath. When was the last time he’d had a bath and not a cold shower? The
house was full of luxuries he’d never even dreamed of, but it was also  a gift
that he feared would one day be taken from him.
 
“Cain.”
 
“Yes?” Cain asked as he poured some bubble bath into the water, just enough to
help soften Dean’s skin.
 
“Promise me something.” Dean gulped and when Cain nodded, he continued,
“Promise me you won’t take away this house even if something were to happen to
me or to us. I can’t let the kids get used to this if it can be revoked.”
 
Cain stared at him for a moment in silence, before dropping his eyes back to
the filling tub. “Are you breaking up with me, Dean?”
 
“What- No!” Dean jumped in alarm. “God, no-. I just… I know what it’s like to
be with me and most people leave eventually, Cain. I’m not promising myself
anything.”
 
“I have no intention of leaving,” Cain said slowly as he offered his hand and
helped Dean into the water. “Dean, I love you and your family.”
 
The words were enough to knock him on his ass, and he would have fallen down if
he hadn’t already been sitting in the tub. He stared up at Cain in shock. “I’m
sorry?” he gasped.
 
“I said I love you and your family,” Cain repeated back slowly. “It is alright
if you cannot return the words.”
 
I love you, had never been big in the Winchester Dictionary. Not with him, not
with his father, not with anyone. “Are you serious?” he whispered.
 
Cain nodded. “Yes.”
 
“Holy shit-I-... I don’t know what to say.”
 
Cain nodded, running a hand lightly over his hair. “You don’t have to say
anything, Dean.”
 
“But I should!” Everyone knew I love you’s were usually meant to be returned.
“God, I’m awful- I can’t-.”
 
Cain leaned down to press a kiss to his lips. “I do not expect you to say
anything back Dean, not until you are ready.”
 
“What if I’m never ready?” he whispered.
 
“Then I will always remind you of my love for you.”
 
Tears welled in his eyes and Dean nodded, leaning back into the kiss. “I’m
sorry I’m a failure.”
 
“You’re not. The only way you fail, Dean, is if you don’t start taking care of
yourself. Your children need you. They’re downstairs worried about you and they
want you to get better. There is a therapist I believe who would be good for
you. Will you go see him?”
 
Dean gulped and tried not to roll his eyes. Therapy was stupid and pointless to
him, but he supposed if Cain really thought it would help. “Yeah, I’ll go.”
 
“Good. Now, wash up. I’ll be downstairs. Take your time.”
 
“Hey.” Dean reached and grabbed onto Cain’s wrist, bringing the man’s hand to
his lips to kiss his knuckles. “Stay the night tonight.”
 
Cain half smiled and nodded. “If you want.”
 
“I do.”
 
“Alright. I have to call Castiel.”
 
“Okay.”
 
Dean slowly let go of Cain’s hand and watched him leave, before sinking into
the water to enjoy it’s bubbly warmth. You can do this, he told himself
forcefully. You can be normal.
 
He sighed as soon as Cain was gone, he felt the dark cloud hover and taint his
bathwater black. It would easy to slip under and not come back up.
 
===============================================================================
 
 
Shopping with the cash Cain always left for him was way more fun when tipsy
than when sober, Castiel was quick to find as he giggled and went through the
clothes in the store. He wasn’t even sure where he’d ended up, but going out
had been a good idea. He was going through clothes that were technically too
big for him, but they were all pretty colors and the pretty colors were making
him laugh harder.
 
He was also the only person in the whole store except for a random guy and the
workers.
 
Castiel jumped when his phone began to buzz.
 
                                 CAIN CALLING
 
“Yeah?” he giggled into the receiver.
 
“Castiel?”
 
“Yes?” He snorted and laughed at the sound of his own name. “My name is so
dumb.”
 
“I-... Are you intoxicated?” Cain asked.
 
“Intoxicated,” Castiel giggled. “A little. I found the vodka in your fridge.”
 
Cain sighed, as if he were disappointed. Maybe he was disappointed. Uh oh- was
Daddy disappointed in him? “I was going to stay with Dean tonight, but if you
are drunk, I will come find you. Where are you?”
 
“Oh, don’t worry about it-.” Castiel cut off as the guy who had been in the
store with him began to walk up to him. He frowned and tried to force his brain
to be alert. It wasn’t easy. “Hi?”
 
“You wanna have a good time?” the man asked in a gruff voice.
 
“Maybe. Who are you?”
 
“Castiel,” Cain said, but Cas pulled the phone away from his ear.
 
“Don’t really matter who I am, darlin’, you wanna have a good time or not?”
 
Castiel smiled and nodded, returning to his phone. “I gotta go. Bye.” He hung
up, as Cain continued to protest. “I’m Cas,” he said to the stranger.
 
“I know who you are. I recognize you from a few weeks ago.”
 
Castiel blushed. “Look, I don’t do that anymore-.”
 
“That’s okay, darlin’, doesn’t mean we can’t have a good time together, right?”
 
He smiled a little. “Right.” If Cain didn’t want to pay attention to him, then
this stranger would. Castiel took the man’s hand and followed him out of the
store.
 
===============================================================================
 
He sucked at bowling.
 
He sucked at bowling so much that Sam kept teasing him about having to put up
the bumper lanes. At first, Dean had found it funny too, because it was
guaranteed he’d get better along the way. But he hadn’t gotten any better and
he was still stuck with the score of one.
 
One.
 
One stupid fucking end pin. Everything else had been gutter balls. Dean stood
off to the side, watching everyone else have a good time. Sam and Adam
exchanged a high five, Claire was talking to some guy she’d met, and Jesse was
keeping Cain enraptured in whatever nine year olds talked about for hours. It
was almost his turn, but he didn’t even want to play anymore. It wasn’t as fun
when you were losing.
 
“Dean,” Cain said, drawing him out of his thoughts. “You’re up.”
 
“I don’t want to play,” he replied stubbornly. “I suck.”
 
“You can’t just quit,” Sam said. “C’mon Dean, you can do it.”
 
“I can’t.” He shook his head and walked away. Maybe he’d hide out in the
bathroom the rest of the night. He power walked to the bathroom, because he was
sure Cain would be right after him and he attempted to shut the handicap stall
before Cain caught him, but it only result in him smashing Cain’s hand between
the door and the stall.
 
He jumped and blushed. “Cain-.”
 
Cain rubbed his hand, but didn’t make any other mentions to pain. Not even a
flinch. “No more running away, Dean.”
 
“Why not?” he spat back, feeling angry all of a sudden. Why did everyone else
get to take their time and he had to keep on being strong. It wasn’t easy. It
wasn’t easyto just move on and be happy. “Why do I have to pretend to enjoy a
game I suck at? Why can’t I quit?”
 
“Because the kids want you there,” Cain replied.
 
Dean rolled his eyes and turned to face the wall. “No one asks me what I want.”
 
“What do youwant?”
 
He huffed and folded his arms over his chest. What did he want? Other than for
the depression to kick the bucket or to be a better bowler? “I want to be left
the hell alone,” he snapped coldly.
 
“I can’t do that.”
 
“Why not?”
 
Cain gripped his shoulder and spun him around, making him startle by the sudden
forceful act. “Because those children out there are counting on you and I’m the
only one who can seem to knock sense into your skull,” Cain hissed.
 
The sudden urge to spit in Cain’s face was almost overpowering. “Well, I didn’t
ask you to be with me,” he snapped. “In fact, I tried to get you the hell away
from us, but you just kept on truckin’! So, if you don’t like how I act and how
I run this family, then you can just go suck a goddamn dick.”
 
The words came out louder than he’d anticipated and the whole room echoed with
his anger. They both stood still and glaring at one another; the tension was so
thick, Dean was certain the oxygen levels had gone down a bit. It was hard to
breathe - it was all so fucking stifling.
 
“If you wish to go home, then tell me,” Cain said, his voice back to its quiet
and terrifying calm.
 
“I wish for you to get your fucking hands off me and to leave me the fuck
alone!” Dean shoved Cain back off of him; he pushed so hard, Cain fell back
against the door, which only made him lose his balance further and he
eventually landed on his ass on the floor, after smacking the back of his head
on a sink.
 
The stillness in the room remained and Dean felt his heart racing and his
breath growing labored. It took him a moment to realize what he’d done, before
finally rushing over to check on him. “Cain-.”
 
“Don’t,” Cain replied firmly, which made him pull back. Moving slowly, Cain
touched the back of his head, but his hand came away clean.
 
Dean knelt off the side, chewing on his lip in worry. “I’m sorry-.”
 
“Don’t.” Cain held up his hand to stop him, and then he was carefully pulling
himself upright. Dean remained on his knees on the floor, attempting to appear
less threatening. Cain glanced down at him once, and Dean could see he was hurt
and angry, before walking out. He flinched and carefully stood up as well,
following like a whipped dog.
 
“Cain, please,” Dean called as he followed him back to the group.
 
“Everything okay?” Adam asked.
 
Cain said nothing, except to pick up his coat. Dean rushed forward and grabbed
onto his arm. The look on Cain’s face made him flinch, but Dean didn’t let go
of the touch.
 
“Dean,” Cain said, his voice low and full of warning.
 
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, just so Cain could hear him. “I don’t know what’s
wrong with me and I’m sorry I’m taking it out on you. It’s not fair. I want you
to stay the night with me. Please.”
 
“Are we leaving?” Claire asked and Dean glanced back at her disappointment
face.
 
“No,” he said quickly, squeezing Cain’s arm, and hoping he got the message. It
wasn’t like Cain to disappoint the kids. “Right, Cain?”
 
He watched as Cain looked back at the kids and slowly he relinquished his grip
on his coat. “I’m sitting out,” he said as he went to sit, rubbing the back of
his head.
 
“Me too,” Dean said. “I’m awful at it, you guys play.”
 
The kids shrugged and were quick to return to the game, arguing over who would
get Cain’s high score and who would get Dean’s measly one. Ignoring them, Dean
sank down next to Cain, feeling the cold disconnect immediately.
 
“You got every right to be pissed at me,” he said. “Are you okay? I mean you
hit your head-.”
 
“I feel alright,” Cain replied quietly, his gaze going straight ahead at the
game and not at him even a little.
 
“Please don’t be mad,” he whispered, rubbing Cain’s arm in hopes to win the old
man’s affection.
 
Slowly Cain glanced at him and Dean smiled a little. “I know you’re in a bad
place right now, but I am only trying to help you.”
 
“I know that.” Dean slowly and tentatively began to press up against Cain’s
side. “I’m sorry I pushed you.” When Cain draped his arm over his shoulders,
Dean smiled and relaxed, eagerly snuggling him.
 
“I forgive you,” Cain muttered, leaning down to press a kiss to his hair.
 
Dean squeezed Cain’s side and nuzzled along his chest. It was nice to sit and
be a normal couple. It was nice to be out and away from his bedroom. It was
even nicer to see the kids all smiling, laughing, and fighting over bowling
scores. It was almost as if they were a normal family.
 
“Cain?”
 
“Hm?”
 
“I love you too,” he whispered.
 
Cain gave him a little squeeze and Dean felt himself smiling.
 
===============================================================================
 
Castiel found himself walking down a dark alley, tears streaming down his face,
and he was bleeding from both knees and his nose.
 
He hadn’t had a good time.
 
He’d never even gotten the name of the man who had beat him up. Castiel
shuddered and almost tripped over some trash as he stumbled out of the alley
and tried to figure out where he was in town. The bastard who had wanted to
“have a good time” with him had driven him off somewhere he didn’t even know,
proceeded to sexually assault him, and then beat him up when he’d said no.
 
Now, he was all alone, cold, and his clothes were ripped. His phone had been
left behind with the other stuff he’d left in the john’s car. There had to be
someone willing to give him change for a payphone. Wiping the tears off of his
face, Castiel stumbled toward a group of hookers he recognized. They were part
of Abaddon’s group.
 
“Hey,” he said as he walked up, making them frown as they glanced over his way.
“Do you guys have change?”
 
“Castiel?” one of them said in completely disbelief. He recognized her as Meg.
“The hell you doing here?”
 
“I need change,” he said, trying not to cry again. “Please tell me you have
some.”
 
“No,” Meg said with a slight shrug. “Sorry- Oh shit. I’d take off if I were
you.”
 
Castiel frowned as he glanced to where Meg was staring. Alastair was walking
over to them, a sickening grin on his face. The bastard made his skin crawl.
 
“Castiel,” came Alastair’s drawl with a smirk. “The little lamb coming back to
his flock?”
 
“I’m leaving,” Castiel snapped.
 
Alastair grasped onto his arm. “Not tonight, little angel.”
 
“Wait-. Meg!” Castiel screamed at her as Alastair dragged him right back into
the alleyway he’d just left. “Meg!”
 
Alastair rolled his eyes. “Oh, shut up,” he snarled before he shoved Castiel
back against the wall and then darkness.
 
===============================================================================
  
“A body has been found on the corner of 34th and 23rd street this morning. He
has yet to be identified, but the police believe foul play was involved. We
will continue to cover this story as it unfolds.”
 
Dean frowned as he walked into the living room, where Jesse was glued to the
TV. “The fuck you watching?” he asked, before taking the controller to change
the channel. “Watch some fuckin’ cartoons, man.”
 
“Okay,” Jesse replied.
 
Rolling his eyes, Dean made his way to the kitchen to scratch private places
and then dig around for breakfast. Cain was still asleep and Dean had slept so
damn much for weeks that he felt awake and ready to make some eggs, bacon, and
pancakes for everyone. It was the weekend after all.
 
“Dean,” Cain said as he came in, making him jerk. “I apologize, but I must
leave.”
 
“Why?” Dean asked, surprised seeing Cain looking so distressed and pale.
 
“It’s Castiel,” he said quietly. “He hasn’t answered the phone and I’m not sure
where he is.”
 
“Oh. Okay.” Dean nodded. “You want help looking for him?”
 
“No, no I’ll go. I’ll call you when I find out more.”
 
“Sure.” Dean leaned over and pressed a kiss to Cain’s cheek. “See you.”
 
Cain didn’t reply before leaving, just heading out as quickly as he’d shown up.
Dean shrugged to himself and returned to cracking eggs into a bowl.
 
 
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