Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/8094244.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Harry_Potter_-_J._K._Rowling
  Relationship:
      Sirius_Black/James_Potter
  Character:
      James_Potter, Sirius_Black
  Stats:
      Published: 2004-09-26 Words: 1600
****** Anything ******
by Augustus
Summary
     James would do anything for Sirius.
When Sirius first came to stay with the Potters, he seemed different. He
laughed and joked with James like always, but occasionally, when he didn't
think anyone was looking, his smile would falter and a fine crease would appear
between his brows.
James never knew how to behave when he caught Sirius in one of those quiet and
sombre moments. Sometimes he would spout meaningless insults; other times he
would sit beside his best friend and prattle about Quidditch until Sirius was
too busy telling him to be quiet to worry about frowns and thoughts that he
never voiced.
By the third week of the holidays, however, it was becoming clear that it
wasn't merely a temporary slump. James felt like he was catching Sirius staring
into space more and more with every day that passed and it was becoming harder
to coax a smile from his friend's lips.
On Sunday night, he skipped dinner in favour of getting a head start on his
summer reading, an unmistakable sign that something wasn't quite right. James
found him in his bedroom, sitting on James's bed with his back against the
footboard, a thick textbook lying open on his lap.
'What's up?' he asked, dropping onto the bed and arranging his pillows behind
his back. Now seemed as good a time as any to question Sirius about what was
going on.
Sirius looked up from his book, but didn't quite meet James's eyes. 'Nothing.'
'It's not nothing.' James watched his friend's face carefully. 'Is there
anything I can do?'
'I'll be fine,' Sirius said, perhaps a little too quickly, pushing the book to
one side. 'It's not as though it's anything new. I've been dealing with this
all my life and I'll deal with it this time too.'
'You've never been like this before, though,' James argued.
'Perhaps it's a side effect of being forced out of my family home.' Sirius ran
a hand through his hair, his eyes closing momentarily before he spoke again,
his voice a little softer this time. 'I'm sorry,' he said, offering a small and
painful smile. 'It's not your fault. I'm just a little... frustrated... at the
moment; that's all. At school there are ways to fix that.'
James stared blankly at him. 'Talking to Regulus, you mean?'
Sirius laughed, a sharp, ugly sound that rebounded from the walls of James's
bedroom. 'Hufflepuffs, Prongs,' he said easily, thumping James on the back in
an unconvincing show of bravado. 'Better than any cheering draught you could
possibly concoct.'
'Oh.' James frowned, leaning back against the headboard. 'That makes a
difference, does it?'
Sirius's eyes grew a little glazed. 'Does it ever,' he said, his mouth twisting
into a small but genuine smile. 'You try to be gloomy when you've got a pretty
girl cuddling up to you-or more.'
James shrugged. The only girl that he was interested in was Lily, and somehow
he couldn't imagine her offering the sort of comfort that Sirius was talking
about. 'So that's the only thing that helps?'
'Pretty much.'
'Hmm.' James stared at a crack in the far wall, his fingers plucking at the
quilt that covered his bed. 'You know I'd do anything for you, right?'
Sirius looked at him for a moment before bursting into laughter. 'Don't worry.
I'm not asking you to ease the tension, James. You asked; I told you. That's
all.'
'But you said it helps.' James forced himself to meet Sirius's eyes.
'I say a lot of thing,' Sirius argued. 'That doesn't mean I expect anything to
come of them!'
James nodded silently and looked away. His best friend let out a soft huff of
frustration before picking up his book and flicking to the correct page. James
watched him without speaking for what must have been minutes, then crawled on
hands and knees to the foot of the bed, where he positioned himself beside
Sirius, crossing his legs. Sirius kept his eyes focused firmly on the page in
front of him, right up until the moment that James undid the zipper on his
jeans.
'James, really--' he began, a note of mingled amusement and apprehension in his
voice, but James cut him off, gently curling the palm of one hand over Sirius's
lips.
'Anything,' James repeated, meeting Sirius's eyes for a moment, then tugging
the jeans and then Sirius's underwear downward with a quick movement of his
hand.
He'd seen Sirius naked before, of course, possibly even hundreds of times. You
didn't share a dormitory without casting a few surreptitious glances to either
side and the Quidditch changing rooms were notorious for nude towel snapping
contests. There was something very different, though, about seeing your best
friend undressed when you knew that what happened next wasn't simply a change
of clothes. James thought it was probably a little strange for Sirius too, but
when he tried to look up to gauge his expression, he found that his gaze
refused to drift that high. So, instead, he reached out with shacking fingers
and tentatively wrapped his hand around Sirius's cock.
It felt different, yet somehow just the same. Sirius was already hardening and,
when James thought about it, it wasn't unlike touching himself. He'd had plenty
of experience at that, after all, huddled beneath the blankets in his
Gryffindor dormitory and hoping that he'd cast the silencing spell correctly to
prevent any embarrassing revelations come morning. The angle was different,
obviously, and Sirius was a little bigger than him, but the general idea of it
all was something he could understand and James felt fairly confident that he
could do a decent job of the task. Tug and pull, his hand wet with his own
saliva, and Sirius silent and hardening, propped at the foot of James's bed.
It was easy once he found a rhythm. Sirius stayed quiet but it wasn't hard to
work out the speed he preferred and that he seemed to especially like it when
James brushed his thumb across the head of his friend's cock at the conclusion
of a particularly firm stroke. James changed his position so that his movements
were more natural, curling around Sirius a little in the quest for the perfect
angle.
Once, Sirius tried to pull away, muttering something about how it was wrong for
his best friend to be indulging him in such a manner, but James merely said,
'anything,' again, then, 'there's nothing wrong with helping out a mate.'
Sirius didn't say anything after that, save for the occasional guttural moan
that caught thickly at the base of his throat.
By the time that Sirius was nearing climax, James was painfully hard himself,
his erection pressing against the fly of his trousers in a particularly
uncomfortable manner. Unable to relieve himself in the usual way, he tried to
ignore it, hoping that Sirius wouldn't notice how aroused he was by what was
meant to be no more than the mechanical action of making his friend feel
better.
As the jerking of Sirius's hips and the arching of his back alerted James to
the fact that he was close to orgasm, James found it harder and harder to
resist the temptation to go beyond the boundaries of his good deed for the day.
He couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to taste Sirius: to feel him
thrusting into his mouth as a lover, rather than his hand as a friend. He
wondered what the Hufflepuffs felt when Sirius kissed them and whether his
touches would be strong or gentle when his hands slid over naked skin. He
watched, almost like an uninvolved observer, as Sirius's body stiffened and as
his best friend's semen covered the palm and fingers of James's left hand.
And then there was nothing. No rhythmic movement to focus on, no familiar body
quaking at his touch, just silence and stickiness and a completely inability to
raise his own head. James sat, hunched, as the full reality of the moment
engulfed him, his own erection wilting sheepishly in his pants.
James's throat was frozen, but Sirius was the one who spoke.
'James,' he said softly, a slight catch within his usual tone. 'James,' he said
again when James refused to look up and then, almost desperately, a whispered,
'Prongs?'
James would have done anything for his best friend and so, his lips tight, he
slowly met Sirius's eyes.
'Prongs?' Sirius repeated, and he was smiling, tentatively at first and then
more broadly once the expression began to be mirrored on James's lips. 'It's
okay,' he said, 'We're okay,' stretching a hand out to curve loosely around
James's neck.
James nodded. 'Okay,' he said, his voice coming out creaky, as though he hadn't
used it for a thousand years. 'Okay.'
Sirius pulled him closer, his hand remaining firm around the back of James's
neck, and leaned forward himself, so that when he spoke, James could feel the
brush of warm breath against his cheek. 'The same goes for me, you know.'
James nodded, but didn't understand.
'Anything. I'd do anything,' Sirius said and bent to kiss James, a mere brush
of lips that were maddeningly soft against his own.
James could feel himself folding inwards, his world twisting, faster and
faster, into another shape, but Sirius remained solid beside him, his hand warm
against the skin of James's neck.
'I feel better,' Sirius said suddenly, and smiled.
And that, James thought, as he wiped his hand on his jeans and leant back into
Sirius's touch, that was the thing that really mattered in the end. Anything
more could wait.
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