Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/12323982.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Persona_5
  Relationship:
      Akechi_Goro/Kitagawa_Yusuke
  Character:
      Akechi_Goro, Kitagawa_Yusuke, Kurusu_Akira, Togo_Hifumi, Okumura_Haru,
      Mifune_Chihaya, etc.
  Additional Tags:
      Alternate_Universe_-_Canon_Divergence, Fix-It_of_Sorts, Slow_Burn, Angst
      and_Hurt/Comfort, Some_teen_drama_nonsense, Unhealthy_Coping_Mechanisms,
      Spoilers_from_October_onwards, Sad_Boys_(TM), Explicit_in_later_chapters,
      Akechi_Goro/Kurusu_Akira/Kitagawa_Yusuke_Polyship
  Series:
      Part 2 of Le_Bien_Qui_Fait_Mal
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-10-10 Updated: 2017-12-24 Chapters: 5/? Words: 23768
****** Antivenin ******
by EldritchChoir
Summary
     October 22nd-- At long last, Yusuke feels as if his life is somewhat
     put-together, despite tensions rising around the Phantom Thieves. He
     finally feels like he has his head firmly screwed on, when he
     unknowingly becomes tangled up in the nebulous mess that is Goro
     Akechi. What follows is a change in fate-- whether for good or for
     ill, it is unclear.
***** Interference *****
The Yongen-Jaya train station was filled with a stiff silence. The train was
late. Not a usual happening in Tokyo, since transportation being unreliable
could be enough to ruin the whole city’s day. Yusuke sat perfectly still,
unwilling to even glance at his phone. There was no point. The train would be
late because of the intense evening storm that broke out almost as soon as he
stepped outside of Leblanc. He knew this already because of the scrolling LED
message over the platform. Also, he could not relax. Not with Goro Akechi next
to him. It was a bit awkward, to be around someone who only just recently
announced on television he might not be wholly against you and your entire
circle of friends. Especially since they were still waiting to hear back from
him about the Shujin school festival. His silence was anxiety-inducing for
several of the Phantom Thieves. Akira, who seemed to know Akechi best because
of his continued patronage of the coffee shop where he lived, assured them that
there was nothing to worry about. But Yusuke felt uneasy. Admittedly, that just
might have been a slight hint of jealousy talking. He did harbor certain
feelings for Akira, and had for a long time now. It made him uncomfortable to
think about Akechi and Akira spending time together. In Leblanc. Alone. True,
it wasn’t likely anything untoward had happened. Akira was still himself, and
seemed to show zero romantic interest toward anyone, frustratingly. At least,
as far as Yusuke had observed.
               He had only ended up in this situation because he needed to
return a book he had borrowed from Akira. When he entered the train station,
Akechi was there. They apparently both needed to get to the Kanda stop. Yusuke,
because Kousei’s dorms were nearby, and Akechi’s apartment was apparently in
the vicinity too. He had never realized just how near they lived to one
another. This he had learned from a brief, quiet conversation with him, asking
where he was headed. Seemed they would be travelling together for a long time.
Hopefully this silence wouldn’t last forever. They had never properly spoken
before, and Yusuke was filled to the brim with curiosity. Just what kind of
person was Akechi? Was he all that he was on television? Judging by tropes of
celebrities before him, it was likely just a façade. One that Yusuke wanted to
get a glimpse behind, and hopefully perceive something more, just for the sake
of knowing.
               Akechi was on his phone, just playing a puzzle game, matching
and destroying colored tiles. It was entertaining to watch, because he was very
skilled, and seemed to be doing this less as a mental exercise, but more as an
operation to keep his hands busy. Hand. The one holding the phone had a slight
tremor. It was nothing especially noticeable, but Yusuke had racked up insane
hours of simply observing people over the past few months. It was something he
and Akira enjoyed doing together. He taught Akira that it was always best to
think up something nice about a person when you first see them, rather than
passing judgments. Looking at the world that way made one’s self feel much more
relaxed and fulfilled. Yusuke had been proven wrong about strangers before, and
didn’t want to make the same mistake twice. Pausing to cough into the back of
his closed fist, Akechi tipped his head to look at Yusuke, acknowledging his
staring.
“You like to observe people too? We have that in common, I guess.” He said
brightly, clicking in the button to darken the phone’s screen, and setting it
down in his lap. Perhaps he’d finally gotten sick of the quiet too. This
station wasn’t particularly busy. Especially not in the evening, when everyone
had already gone home from work. Yusuke inclined his head, allowing himself a
small, knowing grin.
“Of course. It’s prudent for those in my intended profession. I’m always
expanding my knowledge of people, and their behaviors. It expands the depth of
my work, so that it may touch the hearts of others more effectively.” Yusuke
explained, crossing his legs and resting his head on his palm. Akechi nodded,
glancing back out over the tracks. It was hard to read what he thought of
anything Yusuke had said with his face out of sight.
“I get that. Sometimes it’s frustrating, isn’t it?” He sighed, foot tapping
absently. His shoes looked like they cost more than a few months’ worth of art
supplies.
“I don’t think I understand what you mean. Frustrating, how? Observing is no
more than accepting what’s presented to you in the moment, regardless of
whether you understand or not.”
“Can I ask you something, Kitagawa? What are you able to observe about me, from
an artist’s perspective?” Akechi asked, unprompted. He turned back to face him,
expression that of a child asking to see a magic trick. Yusuke straightened his
posture a bit, grey eyes probing the figure in front of him.
“You pride yourself in your self-control over your image, but it seems you have
a lot of nervous energy. Perhaps from not being able to express it over the
course of the day. Or maybe because you have a busy mind. Always, the cogs are
turning. It’s perfectly understandable. Aesthetically, you give off the
impression that you do not allow yourself much self-expression, or are overly
fond of old-fashioned things, but I think that is also carefully intentional.
There aren’t many people who carry themselves like you.” Yusuke concluded.
Akechi beamed, nodding once.
“Very good. I’m impressed. Ever consider detective work? Just kidding.
Honestly, I think your other talents would be wasted. Kurusu showed me pictures
of your paintings before. Even with all my ability, I don’t think I could begin
to be an artist.” The compliment sounded genuine, but it made Yusuke feel
uncomfortable still. Maybe it was because Akira had been talking about him to
someone else. He couldn’t know what was said, and that unknown was troublesome.
“Indeed. I imagine you would wear yourself out trying to realistically render a
still life, and forget to put any actual life into it.” He quipped, trying to
make clear that this was a joke and not an insult. Akechi laughed good-
naturedly, nodded in agreement. Why did it still feel like this conversation
was going nowhere?
“Well, I’ve never tried art, so I’m not sure what would happen. I’m usually
pretty good at everything I do, so maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. I just don’t
like it when people get angry at me for being that way. It’s how I am.”
“No, I understand. The same seems to happen to me. Such is the burden of
genius, mistaken for conceit.” Yusuke hoped the growing boredom wasn’t apparent
in his voice. Talking to Akechi wasn’t unpleasant. It just felt like trying to
mime at someone through a window. After a while, without any meaningful
exchange, it just felt like a fruitless attempt at communication. Then again,
he was probably only trying to establish an idea of who Yusuke even was.
“If you’d like, I could try to deduce some things about you. It could be like a
game. A getting-to-know-you game. I’ll probably see you around again, since
you’re good friends with Kurusu.” Akechi offered. It seemed innocuous enough,
though if he said something like “you’re a Phantom Thief”, Yusuke thought he
might not have a response for that. He glanced up at the scrolling LED sign.
Five minutes until the train would be there. At least there was that. He could
always make up an excuse to go walk around Yongen-Jaya instead of joining
Akechi on the train.
“That would be interesting. I imagine I don’t have much hidden information
about myself. I’m a fairly open book, as that’s how I prefer to be.” Yusuke
folded his hands in his lap. Akechi’s eyes on him felt like a nearly visceral
sensation.
“You don’t take very good care of yourself, since your work comes first. I can
tell because of your skin. It’s really pale and thin, almost see-through. But
that’s admirable. It happens. I respect ambition and hard work. Also, you
probably feel much older than your actual age. That’s something I can relate to
also. Just talking to you has shown that to me pretty clearly. Lastly, I’m
fairly certain you have a crush on Kurusu. When I mentioned him before, you
clenched your hands a bit. But more than that, you act very differently around
him. It’s too bad he doesn’t notice.” Akechi didn’t seem the least bit smug
about his deductions, but Yusuke wanted to resent him for it anyway. He felt
cold pool in his stomach, like he’d been forced to swallow ice. When he didn’t
voice his approval, Akechi looked a bit hurt.
“Hey, what’s wrong? There’s nothing bad about feeling that way about other
guys. If you haven’t noticed, I have a lot of female fans, but no girlfriend.
It’s something we share too. …Kitagawa?” Akechi reached to touch his arm to
regain his attention, but thought better of it, and pulled his hand back.
“Nothing’s wrong. I would just prefer it if you kept that to yourself. I really
would rather if he never found out about my feelings. It’s a complex issue, and
I fear I have a lot more to lose than to gain.” Yusuke said finally, drawing
his feet up on to the wooden bench beneath him, tucking his knees to his chest.
They remained silent for a while. Akechi fidgeted with his phone, turning the
screen on and off again a few times without opening the game app again. He
coughed a few more times, trying to keep it quiet and controlled.
At last the train arrived, and they boarded together, Akechi standing aside
momentarily so Yusuke could go first. The car was empty other than a petite old
woman, with a scarf covering her graying hair. Beside her were two brown paper
bags full of produce. Yusuke sat some distance from her, and Akechi sat across
from him. He clearly wanted to respect Yusuke’s personal space. With a second
person in the vicinity, his demeanor changed minutely, and he sat up
straighter. After the doors closed, a moment passed, and then his eyes lit up.
“Hey, Kitagawa. If you wanted, I could think of a way to find out what he
thinks of you without saying a word. It’ll be pretty simple, so I don’t think
there’s much risk involved.” He leaned forward a bit while he was talking,
obviously excited about whatever plan he’d concocted. Yusuke had become
absorbed in his own phone, referring to a checklist he had of work to do when
he got home. There was an essay he needed to edit, and then some research to
conduct so he could have references for the next assignment he had in his
watercolors class. He was almost unable to hear Akechi. He jerked his gaze up
from the screen when he noticed Akechi staring at him expectantly.
“Oh, I appreciate the offer, but I think I’m content as I am. Plus, I wouldn’t
want to trouble you. I assume your life is very busy, and making time for me is
quite unnecessary.” Yusuke answered. Akechi seemed to wilt a bit, before
leaning back again.
“It… It really isn’t a problem for me. I’m taking a media break, so I’ll have
some more free time. Besides, this seems like fun, doesn’t it? It’s not all the
time I get to be a detective for something so much less serious than those
mental shutdown cases.” Akechi wasn’t very insistent in tone, but he made a
good argument. With the way things were going with the severity of the Phantom
Thieves investigation, Yusuke saw some benefit in doing something frivolous
too. Akira always told him to slow down when he got too caught up in his
responsibilities, and he took those words to heart. Some part of him didn’t
want to know the truth, but being a decisive person meant making these hard
choices. And if Akira was not romantically interested in him, he would have to
move on. There was nothing else he could do, for the sake of his heart and
mind. So, he nodded a little.
“I suppose it’s fine, if it really won’t be a burden to you. Thank you. You’re
very helpful.” Yusuke said, relieved to see Akechi smiling at him again. There
was a good reason that smile was dazzling enough for television. He could see
the old woman, who was sharing the train car with them, looking at Akechi and
smiling too, as if it were contagious.
“I’m really glad to hear you say that. Tomorrow is Sunday, so I’ll meet with
you then, at the Kousei dorms. Oh, do you have a bike? I was thinking we could
talk about it at Ueno park.” A lot was happening at once, it seemed. Yusuke had
been hoping to use Sunday to work on his painting for the upcoming exhibition.
If he could manage both things, it wouldn’t be a problem. And he did have a
bike.
“That will be fine. I prefer to bike there anyhow. There’s no point in spending
money on a train fare when it’s so close.” Yusuke reflected it had been a long
time since he had made plans with anyone who wasn’t part of the Phantom
Thieves. Ever since Haru joined, he had become her shopping partner and was
always willing to give an opinion on the clothes she tried on. In the past, he
tried to do the same with Ann, but found out quickly that she never really
wanted to listen to his opinion. Ryuji spent time with him whenever he felt
like going to a park. While Ryuji ran around, trying to improve his endurance,
Yusuke would sit under a tree, listen to music, and draw quick, loose sketches.
The only person he didn’t see much of was Futaba, and that was just because
nobody saw much of her but Akira.
This was something different. He was slightly worried that spending time with a
potential enemy would be looked upon unfavorably by the group, but Yusuke was a
trustworthy person, and they all knew that well. Despite his frank honesty, he
could probably keep secrets to the grave.
A few stops had already gone by. The old woman left at Omote-sando. Nobody else
got on. It seemed the rain storm was keeping many people indoors that evening.
Akechi moved next to Yusuke so he could swap contact information with him. His
phone background was a repeating pattern of bear-shaped pancakes and
strawberries—unexpectedly very cute. It almost made Yusuke embarrassed to be
looking at it, as if he had found out something secret, so he handed it over
quickly. For the next few stops leading up to Tameikesanno, where they would
transfer, Akechi kept the conversation about Yusuke, answering any inquiries
about himself with infuriatingly short answers, or changing the subject
entirely. He asked how Akira and Yusuke met, and Yusuke explained that they had
met at Madarame’s exhibition, and found they shared many opinions about art.
So, when the scandal with Madarame broke, he was there to emotionally support
him and give him a couch to sleep on. Akechi’s expression had flickered with
something like jealousy at that, but it was so fast, Yusuke wasn’t sure if he
had only imagined it. Yusuke wondered vaguely if Akechi had any friends. If he
did, he never mentioned them. But, on the subject of Madarame, he was extremely
considerate. Empathetic, even.
“I know how that feels. Oh—It’s no exaggeration. I grew up in foster care, so
family has never been a real concept for me. Maybe it’s harder for you, knowing
you had a mother who loved you, who was unfairly taken from you.” Akechi said,
his voice quiet, as if speaking any louder would rouse these ghosts of the
past. Months ago, a conversation like this would have been emotionally taxing
for Yusuke, but he’d made his peace with it. Talking about it with someone who
understood these feelings intimately could only be a good thing.
“Her love was transcendent. I actually believe I am lucky to know this for
certain. Growing up as I did, and especially growing up as you did, makes it
hard for one to adapt to the emotional realities of human life. It is part of
why I spend so much time contemplating the heart, and knowing this about my
mother has helped me greatly.” Yusuke explained, watching Akechi’s face slowly
go blank, as it had not yet done before. He was still, contemplating Yusuke’s
words for some time.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought up something so heavy. Especially since I
am only just getting to know you.” He lamented, grinning ruefully.
“Akechi, there’s nothing I object to talking about. How are you supposed to
properly assess yourself and your own life, if you are only utilizing your own
perspective?”
“I just… I have always preferred trying to do things on my own. I haven’t
really had the opportunity to have someone else’s perspective before, anyway.”
Akechi’s voice had lost its normally smooth tone. He even sounded a bit angry.
Something on a deeper level must have been stirred to do that. Yusuke was only
regretful it took such a painful subject to see this. He got to his feet,
knowing their stop was coming soon, and put out his hand to help Akechi as
well.
“Come on. Our transfer point. And I suppose I should be the one to apologize to
you. I really dislike it when you’re not smiling. It doesn’t seem right. But… I
also suppose if you don’t feel like smiling, you should feel free not to.”
Yusuke said, waiting. Akechi hesitated, but took his hand.
“You’re right. And don’t worry, I’m not upset with you. You’re a good person,
Kitagawa. To be honest, you’re probably better than me.”
 Yusuke brushed off this admission as humility, and they stepped out on to the
platform together, then up the stairs to the station proper. There was a
bakery, one of the ones that were common to see in other train stations, with
an employee in an apron pulling down the grate to close for the night. The
convenience store within the station was still open, but that was no great
surprise. Akechi took to standing behind Yusuke rather closely, using his lanky
frame to shield himself from the handful of people who were milling around the
station. Understandably, he was probably a very recognizable face, and wanted
to avoid any confrontations on his way home. Yusuke noted that Akechi was ever
so slightly shorter than him, but because he gave off such a noticeable
presence, the difference did not mean much. Yusuke imagined he had quite an
opposite, quiet aura. The only thing that made him stand out was his hair that
was dyed bright blue. It was just barely beginning to come in black at the
roots.
Through one winding passageway, and down an escalator to the Ginza line, they
caught the next train just as it was arriving. This time around, there was a
group of five girls, all in Kousei uniforms who entered the train with them. In
the car there were a few more people still. Akechi sat in a corner seat, and
Yusuke took his place beside, eyeing the girls as they started to whisper to
each other, and look pointedly in Akechi’s direction. They had about eight
stops until Kanda. This was going to feel like an eternity. Akechi had taken
out his phone again, and Yusuke gave up hope on them continuing their earlier
conversation. In fact, Akechi didn’t seem to acknowledge that they shared one
emotionally meaningful moment together, even though it would probably stick out
in Yusuke’s mind for a while. He wanted to talk about it. There was still so
much he wanted to know. Without anything to say, he just oriented himself in a
way so he was between Akechi, and the keychain-heavy cellphones of the Kousei
girls. He felt a light touch on the back of his shoulder, and took that to be
Akechi’s gratitude. Really, he felt honored that he could be of any help. Even
if Akechi was an enemy after all, he was still an interesting example of a
human being. The fact that Yusuke had gotten through to him at all in their
brief time together made him really wonder just how much ice lay below the
surface of the water. Did this register at all to Akechi, or was he just good
at making people feel like they’re special when they’re talking to him by
dropping hints about his personal life?
Why did he care so much?
               Emerging from Kanda station, they found that night had come
while they were underground, and the rain had not yet stopped. Yusuke pulled
his umbrella from the messenger bag he had over his shoulder. Deep navy with
yellow stars. Akechi clicked open the briefcase he seemed to always have with
him, and glanced inside. He snapped it shut with a sigh, looking a bit more
stressed than Yusuke would have anticipated anyone being over an umbrella.
“We can share mine. I’ll accompany you back home.” He offered quickly, pressing
the button on the handle to unfurl the wire ribs. Akechi’s hands were trembling
a bit more noticeably.
“You’re really too kind, Kitagawa. If you don’t mind, though, can we sit
outside the station for a bit? Around the side?” He asked, folding his arms
behind him, bringing his hands out of sight. Yusuke could only nod. Time was on
his mind, but he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself if he left Akechi alone in
the rain. To the side of the station, there were a couple of benches under a
covered area. The rain hitting the roof made a wall of white noise that
seemingly sheltered them from the reality of the street, and the cars going by.
Akechi perched himself on the edge of a bench, stretching his feet out in front
of him. Yusuke stood still, unsure of how long this detour was going to last.
He watched a black gloved hand dive into an inner pocket of Akechi’s blazer,
and he pulled out a carton of cigarettes and a lighter. This, was definitely
something Yusuke felt uncomfortable seeing. Underage drinking was one thing,
but this was another. He couldn’t even imagine how he got his hands on such a
thing. Akechi seemed to notice the look on Yusuke’s face while he was stashing
the objects away again. Smoke drifted out of his barely parted lips as he
breathed out shakily. The cigarette was balanced delicately in his left hand, a
lot like how Yusuke would hold a pen while he was thinking.
“Sorry. I’m sorry… I’ve been trying to quit, but I’ve been too busy to really
put my mind to it. You know? And anyway, it’s been a long day, and I was
feeling a bit down.” He apologized for himself, although Yusuke still couldn’t
make much sense of what he was seeing. It was jarring. These really seemed like
excuses for something else. Maybe he was reasoning away why he just had to do
this right now, in the line of sight of someone he barely knew.
“What’re you doing?”

“You’re not going to tell Akira, are you?” Akechi was obviously just kidding,
but Yusuke wondered if Akira would care about this as much as he did. “It’s a
bad habit I picked up some time ago. I’ll be the legal age soon enough, and
then it won’t matter.”
Yusuke turned his back to Akechi, preferring to observe the way the rain
blurred the cityscape, than what was behind him. Uncovering the truth seemed
like an interesting pursuit, but he wasn’t sure anymore. This turned out to be
a much more complex first impression than he would have guessed at. Bear
pancakes, puzzle games, and cigarettes.
There was a span of quiet, and then Yusuke heard Akechi get to his feet,
scuffing his heel against the ground. Then, he was suddenly at his shoulder.
“Well, let’s go.”
 
***** Remnants of a Deeper Purity *****
Chapter Summary
     These are the days when it feels like there is nothing but time.
     Akechi puts his plan to help Yusuke into action. Feelings begin to
     cloud, and uncertainty begins to gather on the horizon.
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
The sky was still grey the next morning, but a cool mist had replaced the rain.
Yusuke reflected that with today and yesterday combined, he might actually be
spending more hours with Akechi than Akira ever had collectively. Last night,
when he walked Akechi home, they stopped at a convenience store outside of the
apartment building, and both picked up quick meals for dinner. Then, Akechi
disappeared across the street with a goodbye and a reminder to be ready around
eleven o’clock. Yusuke wasn’t sure why he had been so expectant to see the
inside of Akechi’s apartment, but that was probably much too presumptuous.
               That morning, he had taken some extra time in getting ready,
considering his clothing carefully, and even taking a moment to draw in the
edges of his eyebrows better. Make-up wasn’t something he usually had time for,
or even considered doing in the past, but after one time of letting Ann do
whatever she pleased with his face and a box full of tens of thousands of yen
worth of beauty products, he was sold on the difference. Akira also let Ann put
make-up on him, but he seemed to have a more “I woke up like this” kind of
effortless image, and so didn’t put her teachings into practice. The only thing
he tended to do now, was paint his nails black, which the Shujin teachers
hated. Yusuke, however, thought if he could elevate his personal aesthetic as
high as possible, he might as well. Especially for today, since he had a
feeling they would end up in the Tokyo Metropolitan Art Museum, and there might
be people worth leaving a good impression on in there. Plus, Akechi’s comment
on his skin had left him feeling slightly self-conscious. He took extra care to
cover the dark circles under his eyes.
               Waiting near the street entrance to the dorms with his bike,
Yusuke took a moment to guess at what Akechi might be planning. How could they
figure out Akira’s feelings without confronting him directly? Were they going
to snoop through his things? There was no way, right? Akechi said it would be
simple and no-risk. Yusuke couldn’t think of anything that was simple, but that
was a hang-up of his in general. It was alright. He wanted to believe in
Akechi’s qualifications for this job. One qualification was that he somehow
managed to be exactly on time. Yusuke saw the time change on his phone, looked
up, and Akechi was there, slowing his bike to a stop in front of him. He was a
bit pink in the face from riding around on this chilly October morning. Yusuke
noticed he was dressed atypically. He was wearing a cream-colored cardigan over
a white button-down shirt with tiny light grey dots, and deep burgundy corduroy
trousers. Well-fitted and put together. Definitely different for him, and his
usual range of grandfatherly sweater vests. Not that he ever looked bad. Quite
the opposite.
“Good morning. I remembered to bring an umbrella today. Are you ready to go?”
Akechi greeted him. He seemed to be back to his normal, pleasant temperament.
There were no signs of the cracks that had started to appear last evening.
“Yes… My, I didn’t expect you to dress so well for this impromptu meeting of
ours. Did I say something that bothered you?”
“No, of course not. I just thought you would probably wear something nice, so I
wanted to try harder. But here you are, showing me up with those leather pants.
I didn’t think you’d be the type to wear something like that, but it looks like
I was wrong.” Akechi was obviously in a good mood. It was hard for Yusuke to
look directly at him without being bowled over by his glowing expression. Plus,
the off-handed compliment made it hard for him to find his voice again.
“Indeed, well, it’s not so irregular for me. I thought we might be going into
one of the museums. There’s that exhibition that just opened about Van Gogh and
Japan, and I’d very much like to see it.” Yusuke said, getting settled atop his
bike, meaning to follow behind Akechi.
“Well, it looks like you read my mind, because that’s what I was thinking too.
We should probably have lunch first, though.”
This felt unreal. How much time did Akechi insist on spending with him? A
couple hours? The whole day? The whole day and night? Yusuke had been so
focused on puzzling out Akechi’s personality, he was unsure of how his first
impression on him played out. By some accident, it seemed it had gone well. It
really wasn’t just his imagination that he seemed to be happy to see him, was
it? Yusuke couldn’t dwell on this for too long, turning his focus to what was
immediately in front of him. Biking through this neighborhood, or any
neighborhood of Tokyo really, was somewhat of an obstacle course with the
number of pedestrians in the streets, and flowing through the sidewalks. This
time of day was especially busy, since students were taking advantage of their
free time. The closer they got to Ueno park, the more foreign tourists seemed
to appear as well. It was a hub for weekend visitors with its several museums,
a zoo, and handful of Buddhist and Shinto sites. During the week, it was a
popular spot for field trips. Yusuke remembered the first time he had come
here, he was only in elementary school. But, he still always associated the
spot with a full and happy day. It was such a fortuitous coincidence that
Kousei was so close by. Even though he had a tiny dorm room, living by the park
was like a dream. Since Akira was not from Tokyo, he seemed to never get bored
of coming to Ueno with him either.
After locking up their bikes at the bus terminal, Akechi began to make a B-line
for the café near the middle of the park, taking enthusiastic strides. Yusuke
was a person who happened to be mostly leg, so keeping up with him was no great
inconvenience.
“Akechi, when was the last time you got to do something like this? You seem
pretty enthused.” Yusuke asked, trying to mask any shortness of breath he was
experiencing.
“Ah… Never, actually. But I’ve always wanted to. It’s lucky our interests
coincided so well like this.” Akechi answered, stopping suddenly when they got
near the café. Yusuke couldn’t recall when Akechi had described what this
outing was meant to be like, or how the café and museum would come into play.
He was probably just holding his assistance for ransom so that Yusuke would
spend time with him. Not that Yusuke minded, but it was strange that Akechi
didn’t just ask. But maybe asking was embarrassing for him. Or maybe he was
worried it would come off as something else.
The café was in view of the massive fountain that marked the center of Ueno
park. People sat around the raised ledge that circled the perimeter—entire
families, groups of friends, clusters of tour groups. Even a couple of dogs.
The leaves on the surrounding trees were starting to change color, highlighting
the scenery with red and orange that made Yusuke want to take out his field
watercolor set and paint in the sketchbook he always took with him.
 In the café, Akechi ordered an entire lunch set. Yusuke only asked for coffee
and a croissant, quietly explaining that he wasn’t hungry. Really, he hated
talking about his financial situation around people who clearly had money, like
Haru. She would repeatedly offer to give him money just for his SUICA card, so
that he didn’t have to think so much about train fares, but he declined. It
wasn’t that he was ungrateful, just that he hated the feeling of being unable
to care for himself. Akechi didn’t ask him any questions, just took what he
said at face value. He probably already knew all of this.
They took a seat outside, and Yusuke immediately took out his watercolors,
hoping he would be done before Akechi was finished with his lunch. Akechi eyed
what he was doing with interest. Yusuke was careful to hide the pages in his
sketchbook that had depictions of Mementos as he flipped through to find a
blank one. Not that Akechi would recognize what it was, would he? Thankfully,
he stayed respectfully silent, allowing Yusuke to sip his coffee and paint in
peace. About ten minutes went by before Yusuke was pulled out of his reverie by
the sound of girls’ voices.
“No way, I can’t believe it! Is that Akechi? –It is? Are you sure? Akechi!”
Approaching their table hesitantly was a group of four girls. They didn’t seem
to be any older than middle school age. They all had matching “A” pins on the
small bags they carried with them. Wait, Akechi had merchandise too? Yusuke
nearly had forgotten that the being sitting across from him could pull this
kind of emotional reaction out of young girls, and anyone else really. It took
a lot to get people to want to fawn over you, like a modern deity. And yet he
had no close friends to speak of. That was a highly depressing thought.
“Can we take a picture with you?” One of them asked abruptly, as if it had
taken a lot of courage for her to ask.
“Oh, certainly. Hey, Kitagawa… Sorry to interrupt. You don’t mind taking the
picture, do you?”
“Not at all.”
Yusuke was handed a cell phone. It had a One Piece cover on it. Very endearing.
Looking through a view finder seemed to be his natural state of being, so this
really was nothing. No trouble whatsoever. He waited for them to get posed-
- Akechi with two girls on each side, and that mind-melting grin. By a rule of
thumb, Yusuke took three shots, because one was never sufficient most of the
time. Then he passed the phone back so they could see. The girls were highly
impressed with the photo, but Akechi didn’t bother looking. He sat again,
exchanging a secret glance and smirk with Yusuke that said he found all of this
very amusing. The girls thanked them for the picture, then left, still talking
amongst themselves animatedly.
“ …What a reaction. Does this happen all the time?” Yusuke was still trying to
wrap his mind around what had just happened. Akechi shrugged casually.
“More or less. Typically, I’m too busy to come to public places like this, but
I’m surprised if it doesn’t happen at least once if I do. Let me know if it’s
any bother. I know I’m supposed to be paying attention to you, right?”
“… I guess.” Yusuke responded, distracted. His reservoir brush was in his hand
again. The trees were the focal point of his attention. The people around the
fountain were gestural blots of color, laid down by a hand that knew the
quickest way to communicate forms. He used to be more prone to controlled,
over-rendered painting, but had learned to let that go and trust his skill.
With his interest in abstract expressionism, he was happy to see his style
finally maturing. It took a while for Akechi’s words to filter through his
conscious thoughts. Supposed to be paying attention to him? Yusuke had no such
expectation. Weird that he would mention such a thing.
Akechi had long finished eating when Yusuke was satisfied with the watercolor
sketch, and left the table to throw out his coffee cup. He came back to find
Akechi looking, but not touching the page, his head tilted to try to see it
from the right angle.
“Is that me?” He indicated the figure that was slightly turned away in the
foreground.
“Yes, I thought I would include you since you were in my line of sight. It
balances out the composition. I could paint you again some time, if you desired
that. Live models are valuable practice.” Yusuke started packing up his
materials, and Akechi stood as well, gazing out at the active scene spread out
in front of them.
“Well, I might end up being too busy, but… I think I will try to make some time
for that.” He said in the quiet way Yusuke was starting to recognize was his
tone when he was feeling something strongly, but didn’t want to divulge it.
The Tokyo Metropolitan Museum of Art was a brick building with enormous
windows. The courtyard in front of the entrance was paved with more brick, in
stripes of alternating colors. The most immediate feature of the courtyard was
a minimalist sculpture in the form of a huge silver ball, mirroring its
surroundings. Akechi approached it almost automatically, and Yusuke followed.
Even though their reflections were distorted, it was a grounding sight to see
himself actually standing next to Akechi. He wondered how they must look to
passersby. Did they look like were friends with each other or strangers to
them? Akechi was taking a picture with his phone, so Yusuke stood still for
him, making a wry half-grin. What would Akira think of all this? Would he be
happy that he was taking initiative to make peace with the rival of the Phantom
Thieves? As they were standing there, Yusuke noticed from the reflection
someone approaching them from behind.
“Kitagawa? Akechi? What are both of you doing here?” Yusuke turned to see a
girl around their age. She was classically beautiful with her long black hair,
and straight-cut fringe that framed her delicate face perfectly. She carried
herself with purpose, and stood out everywhere she went. Similar to Akechi, but
there was something much more dignified about her. She gave off the aura that
she didn’t have time for games, which was ironic considering who she was.
“Oh, I know you. You’re Hifumi Togo. I’m a fan. It’s very nice to meet you.”
Akechi said immediately. Yusuke looked from Akechi to Hifumi dubiously. He
already knew her well enough since they were both Kousei students, so they were
already familiar with each other. Akechi, she probably just recognized from
television. She was likely here to relax after a match. The way she was dressed
indicated that, since her clothing was a bit more formal than it typically was.
“Hello. I hope the match went well. We’re just here to see the Van Gogh
exhibition. I met Akechi recently by chance, and we both happened to have an
interest in coming here.” Yusuke said smoothly. It didn’t feel like a lie. He
was just leaving out some information. Doing this to Hifumi felt a bit wrong.
He respected her highly as another exemplary student of Kousei. Also, she would
make a beautiful model if he ever worked up the courage to ask. There was just
something about her that made him sure she would reject the invitation,
however.
“It did go well. I won again. Thank you. I’m here for the same reason, as it
turns out. Could I maybe accompany you?” Hifumi asked hopefully. Yusuke was
about to enthusiastically accept, when Akechi cut in.
“I’m really sorry, but I was hoping to just spend time with Kitagawa today. I
hope you don’t mind. Maybe some other time?” Akechi sounded sincerely
apologetic. Hifumi just nodded graciously.
“I see. No, it’s alright. I don’t mind at all. I’ll tell Kitagawa if I ever
want all three of us to get together. That seems like it would be a lot of fun.
I haven’t been able to spend much time with him either, and I’ve been meaning
to. Ah, of course, you won’t have to worry about me being in the way. I’ll see
you later.” Hifumi inclined her head slightly, waved, and was gone. Yusuke
watched her leave until he felt Akechi’s hand lightly touching his arm to get
his attention.
“Do you like her too?” He asked incredulously, crossing his arms. Yusuke felt
like he was being scolded.
“Maybe. I’m not really sure. Why? There’s nothing wrong with having feelings
for more than one person, is there?”
“No, not at all. I was just wondering. I think she does like you, though. But
now I might have accidentally given her the impression that we--- Hm,
nevermind. We should definitely all meet up some time, when I can spare a day.”
Akechi place his hand under his chin, lost in thought for a long moment. Yusuke
just stared at him flatly. What was all that about now? They were… what? He
knew he couldn’t ask now.
He thought about it through the ticket line. Admission was free for him with
his student ID. Paying for an art museum instead of food was definitely
something he would do in a heartbeat, but today he didn’t have to pick one or
the other. Akechi was waiting for him when he got through the line, peeling the
sticker he was given off its paper backing, and patting it to his chest. Behind
him, a foreign couple that looked to be in their mid-twenties wandered toward
the entrance to the main exhibition, holding hands. Oh.
Did Hifumi think he was on a date with Akechi? Was that it? He had no way of
contacting her to tell her otherwise, though doing so felt like it would be a
bit over the top. Next time he saw her, maybe he could clear things up. But now
he felt nervous. This did slightly feel like a date. Then again, Yusuke had
never been on one. Romantic interests in his life tended to be fleeting. The
only exception had been Akira. His feelings for him never changed, and honestly
only deepened over time. With this possibility in his head, everything shifted
in tone. Being in a dark gallery with Akechi suddenly felt like it held more
meaning than he ever intended it to. Maybe since Yusuke himself didn’t say out
loud that this was a date, it simply wasn’t, and so his nerves were completely
unfounded. Still, he had no idea what was going through Akechi’s head. There
was still no mention of the plan he had come up with to help him with the
original issue.
Putting this confusion away for now, Yusuke focused on relaying information
about Van Gogh to Akechi that he had learned in his art history classes. He
would lean in close to his shoulder, keeping his voice low. Akechi seemed to be
eager to take in whatever knowledge he had to share. Personally, Yusuke was
really taken by the vibrant use of color in Van Gogh’s work. The Japanese
subject matter from a western perspective was like viewing things through a
fisheye lens. Warped, but familiar. Fascinating. That was really the whole
point of this exhibition. The thick layers of oil paint reminded him of peeling
tree bark, but with the brilliance of light fracturing through glass into pure
hues.
“Do you want to go in there?” Akechi whispered to him, pointing out a side room
where there was a film being projected on to the wall. Yusuke nodded, following
Akechi to the back row of seats in the tiny theater. Nobody else was in here.
The film was in English, but it had Japanese subtitles. It was about the
production process of a movie about Van Gogh’s life, animated solely with oil
paintings. Yusuke’s mind was fully wrapped up in it, and he felt like he was
drowning in the things he loved most. This tended to happen every time he came
to an art museum. This was why it was worth skipping a meal over.
“Hey, close your eyes for a second.” Akechi said. Yusuke looked his way. He was
smiling again, but his expression was not easily decipherable in the dark.
“Why?”
“Just… trust me on this.” Trust? That was a bigger request than Akechi could
understand. But Yusuke listened anyway. He closed his eyes, experiencing the
strange audio-cognitive sensation of understanding some words of a language,
but not all of them. The context was lost on him, but he felt like maybe if he
focused, he could understand. He could feel Akechi’s arm slip around his
shoulders. What was he planning? How long had he been waiting to do… whatever
this was? Akechi’s breath was tickling his neck, his arm holding him in place.
His lips ghosted over Yusuke’s pulse for a second, then he found a spot and bit
down. Not hard enough to hurt, but definitely enough to bruise. It was a good
thing there was nobody else in the theater, because Yusuke couldn’t stop
himself from inhaling sharply, audibly. But he wasn’t done quite yet. Sucking
at the skin, he dragged his teeth over the same spot repeatedly, ensuring that
this would be a particularly angry mark. It was more than sore, but felt good
enough that Yusuke was having trouble breathing quite right, heart and lungs in
full revolt against his composure. Akechi pulled away, but Yusuke kept his eyes
closed, sinking down in his seat slightly, embarrassed that he let this happen.
This entire trip to the park was clearly to get him off his guard, but he was
beginning to understand the plan in full.
“Just let Kurusu see that, and tell me how he reacts. That’s all I should need
to know. Sorry I didn’t tell you. You’re not mad at me, are you?” Akechi’s
voice was in his ear, but it felt like it was echoing in his head too. Yusuke
finally opened his eyes, putting a hand carefully to his neck. It was still
wet. He would be lucky if this didn’t come back to haunt him in his dreams
tonight. He clasped his hands over his heart, as if he could coax it to calm
down by squeezing it himself.
“No, I’m… This is fine.” Yusuke heard his own voice coming from far away. Now
he was branded with a red letter “A”. A for adulterer? A for Akechi? He heard
the soft crinkling of paper, and then Akechi stuck a large bandaid over the
mark he had left behind.
“That should be helpful for the rest of today. Are you okay to keep moving?”
“I need a couple minutes.” Yusuke covered his face in his hands. His heart was
still beating out of control, and he wasn’t sure when it would go back to
normal. Maybe never. He was vaguely aware of Akechi next to him, shifting in
his seat. The film ended and then started to loop. He tried to control his
breathing to be slow and even.
“I’m really sorry. I didn’t know you’d get so flustered. I thought for sure
you’d push me away immediately.” Akechi continued to apologize. Yusuke cast a
critical glare his way.
“Well, you don’t really know me that well, so there’s no precedent for my
reactions in most situations.”
“That’s fair. Predicting the behavior of a single person is probably the
hardest thing anyone could do. The more of psychology you understand, the more
you know it’s true. … Did that feel good?”
“Don’t ask questions you’re not prepared to know the answer to.”
“So, … yes?” Akechi was barely containing his laughter. Yusuke wished he was
wearing something with a hood so that he could hide in it. His excuse to break
off the conversation came when a young child and her grandparents came into the
theater. Yusuke wordlessly stood up to leave and Akechi followed. As they moved
through the rest of the exhibit, Yusuke found his mind wasn’t really in it
anymore. He was too caught up in wondering if what Akechi did to him was
alright or not. Technically, it wasn’t, but Yusuke couldn’t bring himself to be
angry enough to pursue the topic with him. A rebellious, unmetered part of his
mind even wanted to give Akechi a bite right back to see how he would react,
now that particular barrier of touch between them had been disturbed. Akechi
didn’t seem to mind putting his hands on him at all, which was an interesting
quirk. Did he expect the same in return?
When they emerged from the exhibit into the main hallway again, Akechi sighed,
stretching his arms above his head.
“Being a museum curator must be a great job. Can you imagine?” He said, eyes
unfocused, his mind still in the dark space behind them.
“Absolutely. It might be something for me to consider as a future career path,
if I can’t get a foothold as a professional fine artist.”
“I’m sure you will. I can see it in you.” Akechi’s grin was subtle, but Yusuke
felt his words in full force. He was still for a moment, considering, then
impulsively, he grabbed his hand, leading him off in a specific direction. This
seemed to definitely break the surface tension of Akechi’s composure.
“Hey, wait! Where are you taking me?” He squeaked, holding on to Yusuke’s hand
for dear life. Now it was his turn to follow.
“I want to show you my favorite part of his museum. A lot of people seem to
miss it.” He explained, coming into a walkway that was open to a gallery on a
lower floor, so visitors could peer down into it. On the opposite wall was a
windowed elevator. Yusuke took his time getting to it, letting Akechi take in
their higher perspective. He was still holding his hand. They probably looked
like small children trying not to get lost, or separated from each other,
Yusuke thought. Small, if only he wasn’t verging on being two meters tall in
reality.
When they stepped out of the elevator into the lower gallery, Yusuke pointed
out the people who seemed to be staying close to certain pieces and not
venturing out to walk the floor like normal visitors.
“They’re local artists. They have amateur exhibitions down here. So, this is
where my painting will be on display when it’s done. But this isn’t what I
wanted to show you.” Yusuke began heading toward a smaller room that branched
off this one. It had a lower ceiling than any of the other gallery spaces,
which to him, reminded him of a classroom. The artwork on display here was
clustered together. None of it appeared truly polished, but there was an
obvious joy that each artist had channeled into making these things with their
own two hands.
“Art by children, huh?” Akechi said quietly, separating from Yusuke to take a
look around by himself.
“Indeed. Times are turbulent, but seeing this always gives me hope for the
future. It’s always so fascinating what the minds of children can come up with.
They don’t worry about perfection. It’s strange that I feel like I can’t go
back to that mindset, even though I’m still young myself.” Yusuke explained.
Again, they had this area to themselves. It was much more out of the way than
everything else that was available to be seen. He crossed his arms, watching
how Akechi carefully examined everything. He shook his head a little at
Yusuke’s words.
“No, you’re like me. It’s not strange. We’ve both been forced to grow up
quickly. It’s hard to reverse that, once it happens.” His voice echoed in the
space, solemn and even. He gave a bit of a start, realizing that Yusuke was
suddenly right behind him, and he hadn’t even heard him move.
“Akechi, I find myself wondering quite often if you are alright. Are you?” He
was dead serious. Akechi was caught in his heavy stare when he turned to look
at him, speechless for a drawn out second. He hummed, deep in thought. His
fingers traced Yusuke’s collar bone through his shirt, then his hand dropped
away.
“I wouldn’t spend time worrying about me, if I was you. Worry about yourself.
You already have a complicated life, don’t you?” He answered, his tone slightly
condescending. Definitely uncomfortable.
“With all due respect, you cannot tell me what I can and cannot be worried
about. If you are truly like me, then you aren’t going to ask for help, even
when you need it.” Yusuke shot back, obviously not one to be throw off so
easily. Akechi relented, his expression going from an accusatory smirk, to just
one devoid of all emotion.
“If you’re really serious about talking about this with me, I don’t want to do
it here. Or today. Today’s supposed to be a fun day, right?” The two of them
locked eyes completely by accident. Akechi seemed to be unwilling to look away
until Yusuke did. He drew closer. Close enough for Yusuke to be able to count
his eyelashes. When he didn’t blink, Akechi took a hasty step backward. He
bowed forward and froze like that, face hidden by his hair, his arms crossed
over his chest.
“I’m sorry, but I think I should probably go home now. You’re going to text me,
right?”
“Of course. When shall I see you next, then?”
“I think I’ve made up my mind to go to the Shujin school festival after all.
They wanted me there, so it would be rude to decline. Plus, I think I can do
some good for that school, sharing my perspective on the Phantom Thieves. Live,
and in the flesh.” It was the first time Yusuke heard him say those two words
in person, he realized. How they avoided the subject of the Phantom Thieves for
so long, he had no idea. Akechi raised his head, and he was smiling again.
“I’ll see you there, right? I think I’ll come Tuesday just to check it out, and
we can do something together after.”
“I wasn’t planning on going at first, but I’ll be there if you are. All my
other friends will be there, anyway. I’m sure they’ll be happy to know I’ve
changed my mind. Akechi, before you go—”
“Yes?” He’d turned to leave, but stopped in place. Yusuke stepped around to be
in front of him, and caught him in a loose embrace, wondering if this was the
right thing to do, or if he was making himself look completely insane. Akechi’s
first instinct was to tense up, but he eventually locked his arms around
Yusuke’s middle, and dropped his head to his shoulder. Yusuke’s arms tightened
their grasp, around Akechi and a great sigh left him. When Yusuke began to let
go, he was reluctant to move.
“Thank you for today, Akechi. I want you to feel free to consider me a friend
of yours.” Yusuke said. Akechi laughed, blinking rapidly, pressing the back of
his hand to his eyes. His entire frame was quivering perceptively.
“What?”
“You’re always so formal, Yusuke.”
Yusuke watched his retreating back, falling into his habit of framing scenery
with his fingers. In the foreground was Akechi again. There was an overwhelming
emotion captured here in this sight that he couldn’t quite place. Not yet.
Chapter End Notes
     Updates will be once a week from now on. I'm happy that the first
     chapter has been received so well. Anyone who isn't normally into
     this ship, and is giving it a try, thank you so much. A lot of this
     chapter draws on memories I have of Ueno park, when I was there four
     years ago. Revisiting that was a great feeling. I'm enjoying these
     "daily life" chapters while they still last.
***** Wicked Game *****
Chapter Summary
     Akechi's plan to help Yusuke find out Akira's feelings falls off the
     rails. But sometimes, destruction is creation.
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Monday arrived with its usual cruelty. This one was particularly terrible after
a night with only three hours of sleep. When Yusuke returned to the Kousei
campus after his museum outing, he threw himself into working on his painting
he was tentatively calling “Desire and Hope”. Right now, with his feelings
doing their own complicated swirl of their own, his particular technique with a
brush came easily, and he was able to spend a few solid hours on layering up
washes of color, before he was too hungry to continue. After not having much
else to eat that day, he made up for it with going to the gyudon shop Akira
sometimes worked at. He knew it was unhealthy to only have one meal per day,
but sometimes he just simply forgot that he needed to eat to live. After that,
he was simply just too troubled to sleep, circling thoughts about Akira’s
possible reaction to the lovebite on his neck keeping him too wired to drift
off until early morning.
And so, classes were hellish. The whole first half of the day was studio time,
and Yusuke could barely raise his hand to his easel. It was frustrating that
the teachers were very lenient to him based on how talented he already was.
That wasn’t fair to everyone else, and also, he would have appreciated being
pushed more. What was the point of being here if he was just going to stare
into space the whole time? For some reason, since his mind had exhausted itself
on thoughts of Akira already, now he couldn’t seem to stop thinking about
Akechi. Akechi had texted him a good morning. Yusuke had left him on read. What
was he supposed to say? Good morning? How’s work? I hate you for putting me
into this mood? He didn’t have the energy for it.
For lunch he bought a bowl of okayu with salted salmon and kizami nori, and
more coffee, then hid in a low-traffic hallway on the top floor, near a window
that spanned from floor to ceiling. It was a favorite spot of his when he
didn’t feel like seeing any of his classmates. He wasn’t exactly the most
popular person because of his quirks, but people liked him well enough because
he was sincere, and imaginative. It was just hard to keep close friendships
with anyone here. Opening up to them about what had happened to him in the past
few months was impossible, because of how embedded his thiefhood was in the
story. The only good friend he had at Kousei moved to Europe when summer began,
because he had been accepted into an internship position. The food was helping
him feel more stable, at least. Holding his spoon in his mouth, he decided to
finally respond to Akechi.
“Good morning, and happy lunch time. Are those nasty Phantom Thieves giving you
trouble already this week?” He wrote. Before he was able to set down his phone
again, he had a response. It was just a picture of Akechi’s face, making a very
exaggerated disapproving look. In the background was a nondescript office. It
must be difficult to be a student, and also on call constantly at the same
time. Still, it was hard to spare much pity for his situation, since Yusuke was
one of those nasty troublemakers himself. Their newly formed friendship was
nice, but it wasn’t a good enough reason to lighten up about the stakes hanging
over him like the corpse of an executed criminal on a rope.
“I’m glad to see you’re looking well.” He responded, then attached a picture of
the view out the window he was sitting next to. The view wasn’t exactly
spectacular, but looking down on the world always made him feel at peace. This
time Akechi left him on read. Sighing to himself, Yusuke let the conversation
go, determined to get through this day without making himself too stressed out.
This was why he didn’t want to pursue his feelings for Akira any further. He
couldn’t trust that it would turn out well, and not seriously throw off his
studies.
The classes of the second half of his day were more lecture-based. Art history,
then Japanese literature, then a break for dinner. That’s when he usually went
to meet Akira in Shibuya. After that, when the sun had set, he was in a special
advanced astronomy course that met on the roof of the practice building, and
utilized telescopic equipment often enough to keep things lively. It was a
challenge to have a night class and not feel too worn out afterward to keep
working, but Yusuke’s motivation came from the idea that if he didn’t keep up,
he would be sleeping on a bench again. That wasn’t an option, now that he had
amassed many more belongings than he could carry at once. He was also
intrinsically motivated, taking genuine enjoyment from his classes, when he
wasn’t tired enough to sleep on his foot.
Akechi finally responded after Yusuke’s literature class had ended. It was a
picture of matcha pancakes with red bean paste, whipped cream, and a dusting of
cocoa powder on top. The text below it only said “Snack time!” and that was it.
This was a bizarrely casual exchange, but Yusuke preferred that over any
alternative. Apparently, this is what it meant to be Akechi’s friend. He was
probably just caught up in the novelty of being able to share his day with
someone who wasn’t a fan on Twitter. With a heavy sigh, he sent a text to Akira
instead.
“Hey, I know you’re probably busy with being on the school festival committee,
but I’d like to see you today, if you’re available. I’ll be in my usual spot,
near the station entrance to 105.”
“Do you even have to ask? I’ll be there.” Was Akira’s rapid reply. Yusuke
stared at the text dubiously for a while, always impressed by how reactive
Akira was to him in particular. Ann often complained that Akira was impossible
to get ahold of, but Yusuke never had such problems. Before setting off to the
train station, he texted Akechi to let him know that their plan was about to
bear fruit. When Yusuke took a place in the train, hooking his arm around the
metal pole in the center of the car, he carefully peeled the bandage off his
neck. The adhesive pulled at the sore skin, and he cringed, hoping there would
be a better way to keep it hidden until it healed. There was no way he could
keep a mark like this exposed at Kousei without generating a million rumors. He
couldn’t imagine who his classmates would pick as his supposed suitor. Hifumi,
maybe. She seemed like the type to secretly be into biting boys. Strangely,
that was less embarrassing than the truth.
Akira was already outside of 105 Men’s when Yusuke arrived, in a strange twist.
He waved, and Morgana poked his head out of the school bag he always rode
around in. Yusuke just nodded, thinking about how good Akira always looked in
his winter uniform. He had such a refined body frame, accentuated by the fit of
his blazer. Yusuke knew that under it, he was probably just as fit as him from
all their physical exertion in the Metaverse.
“Yusuke, you good?” Akira said, putting a steadying hand on his shoulder. Oh
god, he hadn’t noticed yet. When would he? Yusuke nodded, rubbing his eyes.
“It’s the usual affliction of little sleep, and large amounts of work. Nothing
out of the ordinary.” He assured Akira, who looked at him skeptically. Then his
eyes widened.
“What’s that?” Oh god, he noticed. Yusuke pulled up the collar of his uniform
shirt self-consciously, struggling over a complete lack of words. Akira swatted
his hand away, and tugged his collar down to get a better look. His face broke
into a combination of amusement and confusion. Yusuke stood entirely still. He
couldn’t defend against this, and knew he could only let it happen.
“Wow, Yusuke… I had no idea you had such a wild side. Or… That’s a lie. I knew
you did, you just never act on it. Who’s this from? Somebody we know? Ann?”
Akira guessed and Yusuke looked immediately flustered, taking a reflexive step
back.
“Ann? Why would it be Ann? I don’t think of her like that. You know I don’t.”
Yusuke defended, putting a hand over the mark as soon as he could. He tried
looking at Akira meaningfully, wishing he could convey his feelings just like
that. It was hard to do that, though, when evidence was stacked that he now
belonged to someone else. Akira’s brows knit together and he looked Yusuke over
again, like there was something stuck in his hair, but he was too afraid to
bring it up.
“Then… It couldn’t have been Akechi, could it? I know you were hanging out with
him yesterday. Togo told me she saw you two together at Ueno park. Yusuke….?”
Akira stepped to the side to try to meet Yusuke’s gaze. He’d looked away as
soon as Akechi was brought up.
“She told you…?” Yusuke said, and then realized his poor choice in words. This
was going entirely wrong.
“Akira, it’s not what you think. It’s—”
“So, it wasn’t Akechi? Why are you being so weird about this? I don’t care if
it really was him, but I don’t want to see you lying to my face about it. It’s
not a good look, Yusuke. We’re friends, and you don’t have to do that. Besides,
isn’t it a bit dangerous to be around Akechi so much?” The bit of accusation in
Akira’s tone made Yusuke start to feel desperate to clear up this situation
before irreparable damage took place.
“I know. No, it’s only because he said he would help me find out how you feel
about me, because I like you, Akira. That’s the situation in its entirety. I
swear.” Yusuke said, barely able to hear his own words over the pounding of his
heartbeat in his ears. Akira shook his head, and Yusuke felt like his organs
were being ripped out and pulled down below their feet, into Mementos.
“Why do you think I would believe that? It doesn’t make any sense, and you know
it. You’re a really bad liar.”
“But I’m not lying! And why does it matter, anyhow? You spend much more time
with Akechi than I have. How do I know you’re not just jealous?” To Yusuke’s
utter shock and dismay, it was Akira’s turn to blush. His hands balled into
fists, and he tensed, glaring at Yusuke with contempt.
“You’re full of shit. You should hear yourself. Why did you even bother calling
me down here today if you were going to be like this? I have a lot to do. I’m
going to go see Ryuji. Just—Let me know when you decide to stop acting like an
asshole, and you’re ready to own up to your own actions.”
“Akira…” Yusuke started, but he was already looking at Akira’s retreating back.
Slumping against the wall, he combed his fingers through his hair, trying to
take a step back from the ledge of starting to cry in public. He wanted to,
certainly. This rejection was manifesting itself as physical pain. Did Akira
really have feelings for Akechi? How did that even make sense? He stood still
for a while, feeling utterly defeated. This was supposed to be simple and
painless. He wanted to introduce Akechi’s nose to his elbow for doing this to
him. At that thought, his phone vibrated in his pocket. It was Akechi, as if
summoned to him by his own disdain.
“Come up the escalator to 105.” He had written. Sighing heavily, Yusuke did so,
immediately running into Akechi himself at the top. He was in his school
uniform as well, like he typically was. Yusuke distinctly remembered being
happy to see Akechi yesterday, but one glance at his placid expression and
pretty features made him feel sick. It was guilt, and fury at himself for being
lead into this mess without question. But the second he stepped off the
escalator, Akechi embraced him, and he was too startled to speak at first.
There was something about affectionate touch that was a simple trigger for his
mind and body to refuse to focus on anything else. It was something Yusuke had
gone without for so long, that he couldn’t refuse. Sometimes, it was hard for
him to leave his bed, because the soft weight of his many blankets was as close
to a reassuring hug as he could find. It was a logical conclusion that Akechi
probably felt the same way. But when Yusuke didn’t move, Akechi let go of him.
“Sorry, I just-- I heard what was going on from here. You were being pretty
loud. I figured, you would appreciate… Well, I don’t know what I thought. Are
you okay?” He said, looking up and down at Yusuke, as if he were checking him
for battle wounds.
“I’m not really feeling the best right now, no. I just can’t believe he figured
out it was you, and did so that quickly. Now he takes me to be a liar, and I
can’t abide by that. I don’t know how to proceed, do you? If anyone is really
to blame, you are, and I know you’re aware of that.” Yusuke said accusingly,
using his slight height advantage to try to intimidate Akechi with a glare.
Akechi recoiled a little, touching his chin, immediately losing himself in
thought.
“I… I’m really at a loss. I’m sorry. But, I might come up with something if I
think on it for a little while. It’s just, admittedly, I don’t have much
experience in this area. I don’t want you to think I’m not taking this
seriously. I am. If anything else, I’ll have to make it up to you. --Listen,
I’m only here because I’m taking a break for dinner. Can I treat you?” Akechi
fidgeted with his fingers, adjusting his gloves ever so slightly. Yusuke stared
for a long time, sorting through a mental conflict he really didn’t have enough
energy to face. It was nearly impossible to argue with Akechi. He seemed to
have smoothed over Yusuke’s still-smoldering anger with a couple sincere words.
It was frustrating.
“Alright, but I want to do things my way. We’re picking up something from
Yoshinoya, and then we’re eating in my dorm room. Because I’m tired of bad
occurrences from being seen in public with you. Then, when you’re done, you’re
leaving because I have class in two hours.” Yusuke said firmly.
“Yoshinoya? Really? That’s all you want? But, I guess I can’t say no. See, I’m
trying to be a good friend, Yusuke. I really am. You’re kind of off-putting
when you’re like this, and I want to fix it. You went out of your way for me
too, and I recognize that.” Akechi tried a smile, and Yusuke found his anger
extinguished. For now.
Back down into the station, and one train ride later, they found themselves at
the Kanda station again. When they found the Yoshinoya location near the Kousei
campus, Akechi gave Yusuke a couple of neatly folded paper bills, and excused
himself to a nearby alleyway to smoke. Yusuke still was disturbed by this
information, but guessed it was just the top item on a list of disturbing
things about him. Hot food in hand, they made their way to the Kousei dorms.
Yusuke took a round-about route with less student traffic. That didn’t stop a
few students from pointing at Akechi, and talking excitedly to each other. It
was annoying, honestly. A couple of crows, fascinated by a glass marble.
Treating human beings like a spectacle was such a shallow engagement.
Yusuke’s room was cramped, but well-kept. The most space was taken up by a bed
and a desk covered in art supplies, stacks of paper, and Yusuke’s school-
provided laptop. A door lead off to a private bathroom. At the foot of the bed
closer to the door, was a ceiling-to-floor wooden wardrobe with a mirror on its
sliding door. Stuck to the corner of the mirror with a magnet was a picture of
himself with his friends that Akira took, all clearly thrilled just to be
around each other. That’s what it should always feel like, Yusuke reflected
bitterly. Akechi closed the door behind them both, and spent a long moment
looking at himself in the mirror. Yusuke cleared a space on his desk and put
their takeout dinner there, then sat in the rolling chair in front of it
heavily. Akechi looked around the room while he took off his shoes, even
observing the glowing stars on the ceiling. Yusuke did decorate at least,
mostly with his own work. Self-indulgent little sketches and watercolors. He’d
even put up the painting he did yesterday at Ueno Park on the wall behind his
desk. Akechi moved closer to look at it, grinning absently to himself.
“I’ve had fans draw me before, but I like this better. It’s different because
of the context.” He said, then awkwardly looked around for somewhere to sit. He
settled for Yusuke’s bed, and Yusuke really wished he hadn’t, but said nothing.
“I’m glad you like it so much. If you want, you can have it. I don’t mind.
Here, don’t make a mess.” He handed Akechi a container, chopsticks balanced on
top of the lid. Akechi received it with both hands, then shook his head a
little.
“No, it’s okay. For some reason, I’m just glad it’s with you. It’s like…” He
removed his gloves, then gestured to the picture of Yusuke with the rest of his
little family of rebels. “… that, but— but, not.”
Yusuke nodded, already digging into his dinner. Beef bowl again, but really it
wasn’t worth stressing over, when it was free and he wouldn’t be hungry during
astronomy class. He just wished he could use this time to take a nap instead of
entertaining Akechi. But there was something novel about having him in his dorm
room. Nobody came to visit him here. Not even Akira. It wasn’t worth it when
Akira’s attic room was so much less claustrophobic for two, and he had a TV,
and excellent coffee downstairs. He hadn’t even been expecting to see Akechi
today, but there was absolutely no reason he could think of why not. Though,
after the Shujin school festival, that would make five days in a row. A strange
new record Yusuke didn’t know what to make of. His priorities were school, and
helping to think of a way that the Phantom Thieves could continue to assist
society, despite their sudden fall from grace after the murder they were
attributed to. Anonymity was gracious that way. It didn’t really matter what
the public thought, as long as it didn’t impair their ability to fight back
against the mental shutdowns and corruption in any way.
“For what it’s worth, I’m really sorry things turned out this way, Yusuke. I’m
sure it’ll get better soon. I just can’t believe we actually ran into Togo, but
I guess Ueno Park is a smaller place than I thought.” Akechi said after a
while. Yusuke nodded a little, then paused.
“Wait, you knew she was going to be there for a match?” He asked, setting the
plastic bowl in his hands down on the desk again.
“…Yes? I mean, her schedule is pretty public, for anyone with an interest in
Shogi to follow. And I do like Shogi.”
“Akechi…”
“What?” Akechi’s eyes were wide at Yusuke’s sudden change in tone, to something
low and accusatory.
“You knew she was going to be there, so how do I know you didn’t plan this from
the beginning? You were oddly specific about the entire thing. You can’t deny
that this isn’t worthy of my suspicion. And I don’t know how you knew where I
would be while talking to Akira. I never told you.” Yusuke stared Akechi down
again, regardless of whether or not he would actually crack under his gaze.
Akechi’s hand holding his chopsticks had a slight tremor.
“Yusuke, don’t be like this. Even if I did plan this all the way through, how
could I possibly benefit from you fighting with your best friend? I hardly know
either of you.” He said calmly, but refused to meet Yusuke’s eyes. Yusuke stood
up slowly, and took the bowl right from Akechi’s hands, putting it on the desk
as well, then grabbed his shoulders to force him to look at his cold, irritated
expression.
“I’m no fool. You benefit by my isolation, and so you are able to take up more
of my time for yourself. Because if I had nobody but you, I would be forced to
socialize only with you. But you’re mistaken. You can’t pry me away from my
friends. It’ll never happen. I don’t care if you have nobody else. This is not
how you keep someone near you.” Yusuke scolded. Akechi was a startled rabbit in
his grasp, trying to look anywhere but at him. When this failed, he tried to
twist out of Yusuke’s grip, but Yusuke countered by shoving him back,
incidentally pinning him to the bed. Akechi gasped softly as the breath was
knocked out of him in the jarring impact.
“I don’t—I don’t want any of that. You have to believe me. I don’t think you
understand what I want.” Akechi pleaded, but he wasn’t fighting anymore. All
that did was confirm Yusuke’s thread of thought, because if Akechi was twisted
enough in his thinking to come up with a plan like that, negative attention was
just as satisfying to him.
“Why should I believe you, though? If there’s something more I’m not
understanding, you have to be clear with me and stop avoiding it. That is how
this works.” Yusuke was seething again, doing his absolute best to just talk
this through and not let his anger out in full. This day had been too long
already. Akechi was quiet, his face flushed pink, chest rising and falling
heavily.
“Fine.” He sighed, reaching up and catching Yusuke’s head between his hands.
Yusuke was dragged downwards, and Akechi’s lips found his. It was an amateurish
kiss, but he kept trying despite a lack of acknowledgement from Yusuke. Yusuke
felt a stab of some warm, but painful emotion seizing his heart. It mixed badly
with his anger. He tangled his fingers into Akechi’s long hair and tugged
roughly, biting down on his lower lip at the same time, with no regard to any
pain he might be causing him. Truly, he wanted to inflict pain on him in that
moment. But, he was dumbfounded when Akechi actually moaned, his hands
clambering for Yusuke’s shoulders. The sound of his voice breaking like that,
discarding composure for raw feeling, was something Yusuke didn’t even think
was possible. It thrilled him, instilling pure want into his veins. So, he
kissed Akechi properly, tasting a hint of cigarette smoke as he moved straight
into slipping his tongue past his lips. Akechi barely understood what was
taking place, making up for his obvious inexperience with whatever it was in
him that made him want this to begin with. Yusuke bit Akechi’s lip again and
tasted copper. That was fine. This was payback for what he had already done to
him. The resulting whine was worth it, anyhow. He finally pulled back, taking a
good look at Akechi’s face. His lip was bloodied, and his eyes were glassy with
unshed tears. Yusuke felt a pang of regret, until he realized that this
expression was out of happiness only.
“I don’t know what to do… I just wanted to hear you tell me that you want me.
I—I didn’t plan this part.” Akechi’s voice wavered as he spoke, and he chuckled
sadly.
“You’re insufferable, and pathetic, and if you’re not sorry about this now, I
will make you be.” Yusuke growled. Akechi only smiled.
“I know. I really know. It wouldn’t surprise me if you threw me out of here
right now.”
“But I won’t. I couldn’t do that.” Yusuke surprised himself with his own words.
He sighed out his nose, and kissed away a stray tear that had spilled out on to
Akechi’s cheek.
“I can’t know my own feelings right now. It’s complicated, and you’re aware of
that better than anyone else I know. And you’re going to learn your lesson that
I am not a person you want to unfairly toy with. After this, I want you to go
to Akira and apologize to him, and explain that you were manipulating both of
our feelings. If you can do that, we can have a serious conversation about us.
It’s not like I don’t like you, you know. You just need to stop assuming that
you know the best way to handle things, because you clearly don’t.” Yusuke
said, intermittently leaving kisses along Akechi’s jawline as he addressed him.
He was trembling, holding on to fistfuls of Yusuke’s shirt for dear life.
“I’ll do that. I promise. I’m just really grateful you’re taking all of this
seriously. This is one of the reasons why I like you, Yusuke.” Akechi said,
sounding much calmer. Yusuke stood up slowly, intending on returning to his
dinner, but perceived immediately that Akechi had been more affected by
Yusuke’s rough treatment of him than he was letting on. Akechi realized where
Yusuke was looking, and hastily crossed his arms over the bulge in his pants,
hiding it from view.
“Sorry, you pulled my hair and I—I didn’t know this would happen. Just ignore
it.”
“Alright. If that’s what you want, I’ll ignore it.” Yusuke busied himself with
eating again, slightly annoyed that his dinner had gone cold while Akechi had
been keeping him occupied. He turned around in his chair to emphasize just how
much he was ignoring him. Akechi sighed, irritated.
“Just think about how much you hate the Phantom Thieves, and it’ll go away.”
“No--! Yusuke, that’s not going to do anything. Why are you like this?”
After a while of listening to Akechi shift around uncomfortably, he finally
stood up and took his dinner back. It didn’t take long to finish eating. The
excitement of earlier seemed to have boosted both of their appetites. It was
too soon for Akechi when Yusuke started packing up his bag for class. After a
not-so-quick kiss goodbye, Yusuke made his way to astronomy, head already in
the stars.
 
Chapter End Notes
     Thank you for your support so far. This chapter is ever so slightly
     late, but I think it was worth it. No, this isn't the slowest of slow
     burn fics, but I think that with a character like Akechi who has so
     much to hide, there's a lot to be said about how things will change
     as truths are revealed, and how Yusuke's reactions will affect
     things. We're more or less done with the introduction chapters now.
***** Staying *****
Chapter Summary
     The sweet in-between moments. The calm before the storm.
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Yusuke felt like Shujin’s transformation from staid place of education, to
festival grounds was like a metaphor for how the public was treating the
serious events of late like a circus. Perhaps, they were no different from
Romans in ancient times, who cheered on blood sport, like the pain of others
was enough to erase the problems in their own lives. People really didn’t
change much. Yusuke himself was no different. He welcomed the distraction of
the culture festival with an open mind. Even though Makoto urged that they
needed to be careful about what they said, it was still a little piece of
freedom for the day.
Akira was still not looking at him, although Akechi had texted Yusuke this
morning that he did talk to Akira after all. He said that Akira was no longer
mad at Yusuke, though with the obvious split in Akechi’s lip, it wasn’t exactly
possible to tell him that he and Yusuke were not up to less-than-platonic
behavior behind the scenes, and not lie about it. Yusuke blamed only himself
for that. He really hadn’t been thinking clearly. It was lack of sleep and
emotions cranked up to abnormal levels of agitation. But he didn’t regret
kissing Akechi. Not even minutely. If honesty was to be his policy, he had to
be truthful to himself too, and admit that Akechi had a magnetism about him
that he was not immune to either. There was more to it than that, though. They
had so much in common, besides. It was easy to talk to him and expect him to
understand perfectly.
They had all decided to get something to eat first, before going elsewhere in
the festival. Yusuke trailed after the group, walking with Makoto. Ann was an
amusing sight. She was incredibly enthusiastic as she led the pack. Makoto
prodded Yusuke’s shoulder to get his attention. Yusuke nodded at her. She
drifted a little closer so she could keep her voice low.
“Akira has told me that you’ve been spending a lot of time with Akechi. I know
getting intel from him is mostly what I said I would do, but I was just
wondering if you learned anything interesting that might help us already.” She
asked, and Yusuke nodded, showing that he was contemplating the question. He
felt a bit self-conscious, with the bruise Akechi had bitten into his neck
still purple, but today he had his collar buttoned all the way up for once.
Also, he knew a great many things about Akechi now. All of them highly
personal, and not particularly related to the movements of their enemies.
Should he have been trying to pry information from him? Honestly, he never
thought to do so. It would ruin whatever it was that they had, delicate and new
as it was.
“I’ve become more acquainted with him as a person. He truly is just a teenager,
like any one of us. I fear for his position in the middle of things, if the
situation becomes any more deadly. He gives off the impression of competence,
but I’m not sure how he would fare on his own.” Yusuke said, hoping that
information was adequate. Makoto was more than satisfied. She smiled a little,
reassured that her job would be easy enough for her to handle. As they
continued to follow Ann, it became apparent that the school was bubbling over
with rumors. It was hard to go a few steps without overhearing talk of the
Phantom Thieves, the sudden passing of Principal Kobayakawa, Kamoshida, and
even excited chatter about Akechi himself. It was something that gave Yusuke a
jolt of smugness he never expected to feel, that everyone’s current idol
obsession was also the last person he kissed. He wondered how Akechi would play
off the cut on his lip to inquisitive eyes and ears. He could say he was
injured by an angry Phantom Thieves supporter, and still technically be telling
the truth.
Ann stopped their procession in front of the booth being run by her class.
Technically, it was Akira’s class too, but he seemed significantly less excited
about the maids and their suspicious menu of takoyaki. Yusuke wondered what
their mental process must have been like if they were more fixated on getting
the costumes right, than actually providing a worthwhile product and not using
a literal bed sheet as the back of their booth. There was no point in fixating
on one detail, if the overall aesthetic suffered because of it. He made a
mental note to ask Ann later why she hadn’t once asked for his advice. This
never would have happened if he had any say in it. Ryuji was complaining
loudly, as per usual, but his sour mood reflected things that Yusuke himself
felt, but didn’t show. Normalcy was an illusion, like the bright red takoyaki
in the center of the cardboard container they were served.
The topic of their conversation slowly shifted to Akechi, since he was now the
catalyst for their next move. Yusuke participated casually, noncommittally.
Akira was quiet, but that wasn’t strange for him. He seemed to only speak when
prompted to, or when he was too excited to guard his tongue. Another quirk that
Yusuke thought of affectionately. As if he knew he was being talked about,
Akechi himself appeared behind Yusuke’s chair, startling even him as he greeted
the group.
“Oh hey, everyone’s gathered over here, I guess. The festival looks great. You
guys did a good job leading the charge.” He said to Akira and Makoto. His hands
were on the back of Yusuke’s chair. Akira nodded numbly, but Makoto sat up
straighter.
“Thank you very much, Akechi. I’m glad to see everyone’s having a good time
too. It’s been really rewarding. Why do you have that mask on? Are you feeling
okay?” This prompted Yusuke to turn around. Akechi was wearing a white medical
mask, commonly worn either to keep sick commuters from sharing their germs, or
sometimes when teenager girls were accursed with a particularly bad acne spot
that they couldn’t bare to show. Akechi laughed lightly. The sound at close
proximity gave Yusuke a chill down his spine.
“No, I just didn’t want anyone recognizing me. It’s caused a lot of trouble
lately, especially since I’m trying to take a little break from my public
life.” Yusuke found himself nodding at this. It was a salient reason, but it
obviously served a double purpose. Akira knew this too. He sighed audibly, and
made a grab for the entire container of takoyaki.
“Ah, that looks really good. I wish I could have something to eat around here,
but I have dinner plans, so I shouldn’t spoil my appetite” Akechi said
longingly.
“So, why are you here, then?” Akira asked, quirking one eyebrow, then crammed
the spicy takoyaki into his mouth without breaking eye contact with Akechi. The
entire table reacted with alarm, but Akira wouldn’t let anyone see him sweat.
He chewed and swallowed without any change in his expression.
“You’re insane.” Ryuji commented, laughter in his voice. He gave Akira’s
shoulder a smack, and he turned to Ryuji with a slight smirk.
“Uhm… Ah, I just wanted to get a sense of the place in advance, because it
helps me with my nerves. Public speaking is hard no matter who you are, you
know.” Akechi answered finally, a bit unsteady after Akira’s strange power
display. He was more confused than intimidated, and Yusuke could tell.
Imagining the face he must be making beneath the mask made him laugh under his
breath.
“Well, whatever helps. I’m glad Makoto was able to convince you.” Haru said
helpfully, twisting one of her curls around her finger.
“Oh? Are you a fan?”
“Hm, no. It means a lot to a lot of people at this school though. I’m only
happy that my friend was able to do something for everyone.” Haru smiled, and
Makoto immediately found herself smiling too.
“Well, it’s my job.” She said, brushing off the compliment humbly. Yusuke
leaned back slightly so his shoulders were brushing Akechi’s knuckles. Haru was
extremely underhanded in her tactics, but she was probably trying to make
Akechi feel ostracized from their group so he would leave. She would never ask
him to leave openly. Yusuke’s subtle touch said “please stay”, but it wasn’t
enough.
“I’m going to see the rest of the festival, so I’ll see you later. I’ll do my
best to keep things engaging.” Akechi said, withdrawing with a wave. Yusuke
didn’t bother watching or reacting. He knew the dinner plans Akechi was
referring to were with him. He wondered what Akechi had in mind this time. It
was always hard to know with him, but he was excited for it and dreading it
simultaneously. They had to have that talk tonight, didn’t they?
“I wonder what that was actually about.” Futaba said, stretching her arms above
her head. Akira had passed the takoyaki to her, and she was picking out a piece
for herself. “And didn’t he say everybody? How would he even know that?”
“I assume he knows because I have a picture of us all together in my room.”
Yusuke responded, without much thought. Futaba gave him a look.
“You let him in your room, Inari? Why would you do that?”
“Akechi has a thing for Yusuke.” Akira said bluntly, picking at his nails. This
caused a similar reaction to him swallowing the entire “special” takoyaki in
one flawless attempt. Yusuke folded his arms across his chest, his expression
miserable. This really wasn’t something he wanted to bring up, now or ever.
“Wait, wait, what?” Ann said, planting both her hands on the table and getting
to her feet. She leaned toward Yusuke. Morgana had also come out of Akira’s bag
as well, ears perked for the gossip. He was blinking his eyes sleepily,
probably just roused from a nap by Ann’s voice.
“What’s going on? Something with Akechi?”
“It really is a long story, and I’m not sure I have the stamina to tell all of
it. I’m not withholding any information though. I will assuredly explain in the
future. Right now, I myself am not clear on what’s happening. And I think it’s
a pretty trivial distraction from what we’re actually trying to accomplish.”
Yusuke said hurriedly. Akira rolled his eyes openly.
“Remember that fight we had yesterday? It’s about that.” He said to Morgana.
Morgana’s tail flicked in irritation.
“Right… I remember. Jeez, you guys might be real life heroes, but that doesn’t
protect you from human drama, huh?” Morgana glanced around for prying eyes,
then hopped on to the table to claim takoyaki for himself.
“You guys had a fight about it too?” Ann said incredulously, hands on her hips.
Yusuke could tell this was her area of expertise.
“That Akechi guy is always trouble. I don’t know why you even bother, Yusuke.”
Ryuji grumbled, leaning his chair on its back legs until it looked like he was
in danger of it falling.
“I don’t know if we should be so judgmental. We don’t really know much about
him, do we?” Haru added softly. Makoto nodded in agreement.
“And it’s hard to say with any certainty what someone is like unless you spend
a lot of time with them. Yusuke, tell them what you told me.”
“I said, in summary, that he is really no different from any one of us. He has
his own personal problems too. Now that I know something about these problems,
I feel compelled to be a positive influence. It’s hard for me to picture Akechi
on his own being too much for us to handle as a group. That’s why fighting
among ourselves is really not going to be of any use.” Yusuke said, looking at
Akira pointedly. Akira took off his glasses and polished them with his sleeve.
“When you’re right, you’re right. I’m sorry I’ve been acting like this. It’s
not fair of me. And I don’t think I have it in me to stay mad at you forever
either.” Akira answered.
“I could stay mad at him forever.” Futaba cut in. Makoto laughed despite
herself, then covered her mouth with both hands.
“I probably could too, if being around Akechi too much did anything to get us
into some kind of trap. But for now, Yusuke’s life is his and we can’t really
do anything about that.” Morgana said as well, licking his face as cats tended
to do after tasting something delicious. That seemed to be the end of the
topic, until Ann spoke up again
“So, why was he in your room? Did you…. you know, score?” She said, lowering
her voice conspiratorially. Yusuke smirked, wondering if he should answer this
at all, or if that would just make things even more awkward. Everyone was
looking at him now.
“No. But I did discover that pulling his hair arouses him. If he ever steps out
of line, we could always resort to that.”
“Dude, I could have gone my whole life without knowing that, thanks.” Ryuji
grimaced. But Akira laughed genuinely, and that alone made Yusuke feel a week’s
worth of tension roll off his back.
The rest of the festival day passed by without any additional stress. Yusuke
got caught up in a competition Futaba proposed to see which one of them could
win the most games collectively. Somehow, despite their best efforts, Akira
bested them both, even though he wasn’t even officially participating. They
finished off the day with watching the drama club perform short improv skits in
the auditorium. Ryuji got roped in as a volunteer, and surprisingly did a good
job of loosening up and adapting to the humor. He was so unware of his own
comedic potential, that he seemed surprised by it too, talking excitedly after
the performance about how much he made the audience laugh when he was
pretending to be chased by bees in slow motion.
Yusuke made his way back to the dorms to change out of his uniform. While he
was stripping out of his shirt, he saw his phone light up with a text from
Akechi. He was asking Yusuke to meet him in Shinjuku. Not in the redlight
district, but near Shinjuku Central Station. He also mentioned to dress nicely,
which Yusuke was planning on anyway. Now that he had real motivation to do so,
he was determined to make sure that Akechi could never outshine him when they
were side by side in public. It didn’t matter if he was naturally beautiful.
Yusuke was too, and he had the advantage of an aesthete’s taste. He had a knack
for looking expensive, even though most of his clothes were secondhand. It
wasn’t any trouble to visit the sewing club at Kousei to get his jackets and
pants better fitted. It was all worth the collective effort when Akechi caught
sight of him outside the train station, and spent a long moment just staring
wordlessly. Even though he still had the mask on, Yusuke could see that he was
blushing slightly.
“What seems to be the matter?” He asked, just to tease him. Akechi covered his
face with his hands.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to stare, you just look—Well, I don’t know what I
expected. I told you to dress nice, but I forget you’re on an entirely
different level than me.” Akechi said, not fighting as Yusuke pried his hands
away from his face.
“You look resplendent as always, Goro.” He said soothingly, watching the
reaction to his words with amusement. Akechi went back and forth between
wanting to run away, and wanting to throw his affection at Yusuke. But since
there was an endless stream of people passing by them, to and from the station,
he just hugged himself instead, laughing in defeat.
“Stop that. My heart can’t take it.” He protested, giving Yusuke a shove in the
center of his torso.
“Well, this is a date, isn’t it? If your heart can’t take being called by your
given name, I have serious concerns about what may happen to you later. I can’t
have your death on my hands.” Yusuke put forth a serious tone, but he was
clearly trying to hold back a laugh too.
“Wow, I guess it really is a date, huh? Feels weird to actually say it, but
you’re right. Do you want to hold my hand, or are you against that?” Akechi put
out his hand tentatively, and Yusuke took it without hesitation.
“You should know by now that I’m not one to care too much about what
inconsequential people think about me. Where are we going?” As per usual,
Akechi was guiding Yusuke forward, making his way with purpose in the direction
of Chuo Park and Bunka, the fashion college. They weaved around the pedestrians
travelling in the counter direction. Yusuke found himself rubbing the back of
Akechi’s hand with his thumb. His heart felt so full, just watching him,
holding on to him.
“It’s a new restaurant I’ve heard about recently, and I wanted to try. It’s
something I do a lot by myself, but now I can share it with you.”
“Oh? So you’re a bit of a food critic? I enjoy cooking myself, but I haven’t
been able to since I left sen—Madarame’s house.”
“That’s not even slightly surprising. If you could cook for me sometime, I
would love that. If you wanted to, I mean.”
“Of course.”
The restaurant in question turned out to be dim sum, which was an interesting
choice. Especially since everything had a bit of a cute twist to it. The most
popular item was steamed buns, shaped like a huge variety of little animals.
Yusuke reflected that he really should have predicted this, because of Akechi’s
mostly-secret affinity to cute things. At least, he never tried to feed him,
like he noticed some girls doing to their boyfriends. This wasn’t exactly the
kind of place that one dressed up for, he observed. So, this was not their only
destination for the night. As much as he was enjoying this, a part of him was
stuck on the idea of “later”, and filled with an underlying anticipation.
Once he was fed, Akechi was much less on-edge about things, and kissed Yusuke
on the cheek before putting his mask back on as they left the restaurant.
“Thanks for coming with me. I feel like coming there alone would have been a
little awkward. It seems like a popular date spot, doesn’t it?” Akechi
commented, eyes skyward. Yusuke looked upward too, but no stars were visible
over the lights of the city.
“Yes, I sensed a lot of reluctance back there. So many men, helpless under the
doe-eyed gazes of the women they love.” Yusuke said, collecting Akechi’s hand
again and swinging their arms a little. Akechi was being oddly quiet.
“So, where else are we going?” He asked, getting a good look at Akechi, and his
far-off expression.
“Well, I wanted to go to this club I go to a lot in Kabuchiko, and play you in
a couple rounds of darts. It’s kind of up-scale, and they have a dress code,
which is why I mentioned the clothes. But, I remembered we still have to talk
about some things. So, I was wondering if you wanted to go back to my place?”
Yusuke could see the hopeful look in Akechi’s eyes, and he nodded his
agreement. If things went well, this would just be the first of many dates like
this, and they could always face off at darts on another occasion.
The train ride back to Kanda station was like punctuation at the end of a
sentence. The mood had suddenly changed entirely. Akechi leaned into Yusuke’s
side, claiming that he was feeling sleepy from eating so much. Excuses or no,
Yusuke was more than happy to let him do so. This kind of openness with touch
was new and captivating to him as well. There were still a few middle-aged
women, who looked like they were co-workers, that looked at them critically.
But, there was no force on Earth that would be enough to pry Akechi off him in
that moment. Yusuke could only assume he was going through similar epiphanies
in terms of realizing it was time to spit in the face of caution, to make
whatever it was they had possible. Yusuke had had quite enough of tragedy, and
empty spaces in his heart and mind, that felt like question marks without dots.
Awkward, and incomplete. He knew that he still had feelings for Akira, stronger
than what he had with Akechi, but it was self-defeating to deny himself this
happiness. And being with Akechi didn’t feel like settling for less, anyway.
They were different people, and he couldn’t compare them, or choose one for the
other.
Akechi dropped his keys while in the process of trying to unlock his front
door. Yusuke didn’t know if it was nerves, or excitement, or both. He took this
in stride, barely reacting to having to pick the ring up from off the doormat.
Akechi finally clicked the lock open, and held the door for Yusuke, finally
taking the mask off his face entirely. The cut on his lip was only a small scab
now, not particularly worrying. Yusuke stepped past Akechi, automatically
reaching for his shoes to remove them. The apartment was small, but still
bigger than his dorm. It only looked like it was three rooms. A combination
living room and kitchen, bathroom, and Akechi’s bedroom. Everything was oddly
stark, and devoid of personal touches, but this was explained by the still-
packed cardboard boxes stacked in several corners.
“I moved here about two weeks ago because some particularly messed-up Phantom
Thieves supporters found out where I lived, but I’ve been too busy to do
anything about unpacking.” Akechi explained, slipping out of his shoes as well.
He only had one pair of house slippers, but ignored them entirely, making an
immediate move toward the glass sliding door that opened on to his porch. To
smoke, Yusuke realized. He made his way to the black suede couch that would
have room enough only for three people at most, and sat with his legs tucked
under him. It was nice to have a place to yourself, regardless of how small.
And small apartments in Tokyo were deceivingly expensive. There was quiet now,
and Yusuke decided that he hated it. He could only see Akechi’s back from here,
and the glass door was closed so the smoke wouldn’t get inside. Sending a quick
text to Akira, he stretched out, waiting patiently.
“I’m on a date with Akechi. Or rather, I was, but now I’m at his apartment.
It’s so strange.” He had written. Two minutes passed.
“Oh? Have you ‘scored’ yet?” Akira wrote back, with a winking emoji at the end.
“Is this going to be a new permanent in-joke?”
“Yes.”
“I still care strongly for you too, Akira. Don’t forget that.”
There was no response after that. Eventually, Akechi came back inside, shedding
his jacket and draping it over the kitchen counter. He caught sight of Yusuke
on the couch, leaning into one corner with his stupidly long legs spread out,
and smiled wryly at him.
“Are you comfortable? There’s no room for me now.” He put his hands on his
hips, pretending to be deeply irritated. Yusuke looked fixedly at him.
“Don’t be foolish. Of course there is.” He replied, deadpan. Akechi didn’t need
any other coaxing. Settling into Yusuke’s lap, he yelped as he was immediately
ensnared in his arms and kissed hard. Akechi slid his arms over Yusuke’s
shoulders, leaning into him ardently. These were heated, open-mouthed kisses.
Yusuke was starting to associate the taste of cigarettes less with lung cancer,
and more with Akechi himself. Akechi apparently didn’t have any desire to stop,
pressing himself to Yusuke with no pre-conceived notion of what he actually
wanted. Yusuke pried him off by giving his ass a firm squeeze, breaking the
kiss with the resulting gasp.
“I need you to listen to me for a little while, and then we can return to this.
Can you do that for me?” He said, sounding much more cool-headed than he was
feeling. Akechi nodded, head slumping down to Yusuke’s chest.
“Sorry, I’m much more pent up than I ever anticipated. But it’s okay. I have
things I need to share with you too.” Akechi said, short of breath and amused
at his own actions.
“Good. First of all, I want to know exactly what you want from me, so we are on
the same page. It’s all well and good to take things as they happen, but I’m
not interested in the usual highschool game of waiting until I’m confused and
cross with you to ask what’s on your mind.” Yusuke ran his fingertips down
Akechi’s spine, feeling the bumps of his vertebrae through his cotton shirt.
Akechi shifted so he could look at Yusuke directly.
“I need to explain. To get to the point, I know you’re a Phantom Thief.
But—Hey, don’t make that face. But, I don’t care. I found out very quickly that
you’re much more than that. You’re someone I feel like is good for me. Don’t
misunderstand, I hate what you’ve been doing, but I’d be disgracing my own
intelligence if I acted like that was your only dimension. And so, I want us to
be together. As in, I want to hear you call me your boyfriend. And I’d be proud
to call you the same.” Akechi’s confession had Yusuke stunned silent. He kept
tracing Akechi’s spine while he collected his thoughts.
“So, you’ve known for how long? And how? I need to get this straightened out
before I say any more.”
“Ah, well… It was around the beginning of the controversy surrounding Okumura
Foods. I have pictures that I can show you later, of you and your other friends
just—disappearing. Uhm, I was going to bring it up to everyone tomorrow, but I
wanted to talk to you first. The Metaverse, and all the things associated with
it are things I’m very much aware of, because I have the same ability that you
all have.  An app appeared on my phone recently that lets me go there at will,
and—Well, it’s not exactly a place I enjoy visiting, considering I nearly died
there. I’ll explain more tomorrow, because there’s something I need you all to
help me with.” Akechi explained, rubbing a strand of Yusuke’s hair between his
fingertips. Yusuke scrutinized his face, as if he could discern a lie if he
looked hard enough.
“So, this is all true? And the purpose of the photos is to blackmail us?”
“Only if I have to. Yusuke, you know me better than they do. Do you think they
would listen to you? I have all the information you could ever want, and the
skills to help you do something good. This is something I have to do. I know it
probably doesn’t make sense why I would align myself with your cause, but I
came to the conclusion that this is the only move I can make now.” Yusuke
nodded slowly at Akechi’s words.
“I see. And so you are my rival still, but also my boyfriend?” He said,
summarizing his conclusion.
“Yes, exac—Ah… So that’s a yes, then?”
“Yes. It’s mysterious how fate works, isn’t it?”
Akechi’s eyes were shining, and Yusuke recognized that he was in danger of
shedding even more tears. Even if they were happy ones, seeing him so moved by
something like this spoke volumes about the pain he was potentially keeping
locked inside him. All he wanted so intensely in that moment, taking in
Akechi’s face, was to negate whatever it was that was poisoning him. Akechi
sighed heavily, his tongue flicking out to prod the scab on his lower lip.
“Is that all you wanted to ask? I’m glad we talked about all this heavy stuff,
but I’m really ready for something else now.”
“Nothing else that I can think of. I just want to be sure you know that you are
an exquisite being, and I’m proud of you too. And I’m full of regret that I
didn’t bring my sketchbook and watercolors tonight, because I need to paint
you, so you can see everything I’m feeling.” He held Akechi’s face between his
hands, bringing him literally nose-to-nose with him. Akechi rested his forehead
against Yusuke’s, closing his eyes.
“You can show me how you’re feeling in other ways too.”
“Hmm, you’re not wrong. Perhaps we should move into your room? That seems like
a more appropriate venue. I’m fond of the archetype of lovers in a desperate
embrace wherever they may happen to be, but I don’t believe we’ve reached that
phase yet. We’ve already reached this point startlingly fast though,
considering this time last week I was under the impression that you were a one-
note, untalented hack.” Akechi laughed quietly, kissing Yusuke once again.
Chapter End Notes
     Don't worry. This is a cliffhanger, not a fade-to-black. Slightly
     early update this week because I was all ready for it, and I figure
     the next chapter is going to be highly anticipated. The chapter name
     is in reference to the song Staying by Koda.
***** Trust *****
Chapter Summary
     CW: self-harm mention, suicide mention
     Yusuke scores; the gang has a lot of drama.
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
-------- “You don’t even want to know what I thought of you. But, yes. Suede
takes stains really easily, and my boss stops by here sometimes. Let’s—” Yusuke
picked Akechi up easily, who cut off his sentence with a noise of surprise. He
seemed to be quite content with being carried, however. Akechi’s room was dark,
but the light from the living room illuminated the space enough for Yusuke to
find his bed. It was pushed up against the right wall, beneath a window. He
dropped Akechi on the mattress, and turned to go turn on the lights, but he was
caught by his sleeve.
“Sorry, I really want to keep them off if that’s okay. It’s my first time doing
anything like this, and I’d feel more comfortable if…” Akechi said, toying with
his shirt buttons. Yusuke was a little caught off-guard by the request, but
couldn’t imagine defying it.
“Here, I’ll close the door slightly too.” He offered, pushing the door shut
until it was only barely ajar, and all the light that was left was a
concentrated sliver. Yusuke rejoined Akechi on the bed. He shed his jacket as
well, tossing it in the general direction of Akechi’s desk chair with no real
concern for accuracy. It was too dark to be bothered. He could see the outline
of Akechi’s body, and slowly his eyes adjusted enough to see the emotions
playing across his face. He was nervous. Yusuke knelt in front of him and put
his arms out.
“Come on, I swear I won’t bite you again. That was too much.” He said, watching
Akechi crawl forward, lock his arms around Yusuke’s middle, and slump down,
pressing the top of his head into his chest.
“But what if I want you to bite me, though?”
“Then I will. Whatever you ask me for, I will give it to you. You need only
ask.” Yusuke replied. Akechi slowly raised his head again.
“Kiss me like you did yesterday?” He asked coyly. Yusuke complied, pinning him
down by his shoulders, studying him hungrily for a moment, then kissing him
with emboldened ferocity. Akechi reciprocated with the same energy, as if
Yusuke’s touch had smoked out the shyness still hiding in him. He tugged at
Yusuke’s shirt, untucking it and sliding his hands under the fabric, fingers
splaying over his skin greedily. Yusuke hummed lowly, licking the side of
Akechi’s lips playfully.
“That tickles. What are you doing?”
“Nothing. Mm, I mean, just checking to make sure you’re real.” Akechi answered
wrly, withdrawing his hands. Yusuke sighed, and laid down beside him. He took
hold of Akechi’s wrist, directing under his shirt again.
“You can check all you’d like. I’ll let you.” Yusuke didn’t know if Akechi was
just joking, or meant it literally, but wanted to see what he would do with
control given to him. Akechi immediately straddled Yusuke’s hips, loosening his
shirt buttons keenly, kissing every centimeter of his torso as it was revealed.
Yusuke closed his eyes, trying to keep his breathing deep and even. But Akechi
was determined to ruin him, rolling one of his nipples with his tongue, fingers
drawing circles just below his bellybutton. He caught himself whispering
encouragement, giving a stuttering gasp as Akechi’s teeth grazed the sensitive
skin. Yusuke’s pants were the next thing to go. He opened his eyes after there
was a long pause of just Akechi’s hands planted on his upper thighs. Naturally,
he was half-hard and this seemed to be a subject of fascination.
“Can I touch you?” he breathed, already reaching tentatively toward his goal.
“Isn’t that the point of this little exercise?” Yusuke teased. Akechi snorted,
gaining determination to find a way to shut Yusuke up. His fingers brushed over
Yusuke’s dick lightly at first, feeling more fabric than anything else, but he
got over his apprehension quickly, squeezing him through his boxers for a few
brief moments, before just plunging his hand under his waistband. He was still
sitting on Yusuke’s legs, though unconsciously grinding his hips against his
bony knee. Otherwise, he seemed entirely absorbed in this task, finding out
rapidly that the only way to do this right was to lose the boxers entirely.
That done, he spat on his palm, and began stroking Yusuke’s arousal in earnest.
Yusuke stifled a louder groan with the back of his hand, eyes fixed on Akechi.
“You’re doing so well… So good…” He whispered hastily, not recognizing his own
voice. With the praise, Akechi paused, and Yusuke swore he could see him
blushing in the darkness. Ah, interesting. He sat up slowly, naturally easing
into another kiss, tongue twisting against Akechi’s. He made quick work of his
shirt buttons too, and Akechi let the garment drop to the floor to join the
rest of their clothes. Yusuke held him by the waist, rubbing his sides
soothingly. Akechi shivered. Yusuke coaxed him out of his trousers as well,
then pulled a stray throw blanket that was stuck between the bed and the wall
over them both. Yusuke reversed their position, negotiating a place between
Akechi’s legs, humming lowly. Akechi was kissing at his throat, teasing the old
hickey, sucking at it stubbornly. It was overly sore, but somehow still felt
good. And now with Akechi tugging his weight down on top of him, the added
sensation of their bare bodies pressed together was an epiphany all its own.
This dark, warm space made it even harder for Yusuke to find Akechi’s lips
again, but he wasn’t happy until he did. Taking their time in the moment like
this turned out to be the right answer. Everything felt slow, and overly
sensual. Every sound that Akechi made against Yusuke’s mouth was amplified. He
slipped one hand into Akechi’s boxers, just to smooth over his hip and upper
thigh. In response, Akechi’s leg hugged over Yusuke’s back, and he lifted his
hips slowly, belly brushing against him.
“Yusuke…” Akechi murmured, too proud to beg properly. Wordlessly, Yusuke
discarded Akechi’s underwear as well, losing it somewhere in the blankets. He
shifted downward, planting kisses just below his ribs where he guessed Akechi
might be sensitive. He was, abdominal muscles twitching in response. He also
had a beauty mark there. Yusuke could feel the slightly raised spot. An idea
was set in his mind, and he was anxious to see Akechi’s response. The lower his
mouth went, the more obvious it likely became. When his tongue met the head of
Akechi’s dick, he cried out airily, reaching down to brush Yusuke’s hair off
his forehead affectionately. Although Yusuke wasn’t quite sure of what he was
doing, he had zero worry that he could do this wrong. Just a couple teasing
licks, then take it in centimeter by centimeter. Pull back. Suck. Akechi was
already a mess. If these walls were thin enough, the neighbors would definitely
have a sound complaint. His hand was frozen, gripping a fistful of Yusuke’s
hair. Yusuke rubbed his inner thigh soothingly, feeling a currently uncountable
row of thin, even raised lines. His heart squeezed painfully. Pushing it out of
his mind, he continued, bobbing his head steadily. Anything his mouth couldn’t
reach, he kept a hand on. His other hand kept Akechi’s hips pinned. They kept
twitching upward reflexively, and Yusuke wasn’t keen on suffocating on dick
today.
“Ha.. ah… I’m close. I’m really close. Yusuke, I’m going to…” Akechi tried to
warn desperately, but Yusuke was disinterested in stopping. Akechi grip on his
hair became painful when he came. Yusuke wished he could have seen the look on
his face, based on the fantastic choked whine that was wrenched out of him.
Swallowing with satisfaction, he pulled away. Yusuke gave his stomach a fond
pat, looking at him through a haze.
“Holy shit, I can’t believe you. Here, let me…” Akechi’s voice had a scratchy
quality to it now that Yusuke found endlessly attractive. He moved up to lay
beside him, pulling the blanket down enough so he could breathe. Akechi rolled
to face him, immediately nuzzling into Yusuke’s collarbone. Yusuke set upon
stroking his hair, while Akechi’s fingers lavished attention on his arousal. He
did this without even watching. Yusuke could tell he was close to falling
asleep, but he was determined to get Yusuke off too before unconsciousness
claimed him. His technique was good enough that it didn’t take long, grinding
the flat of his palm against the head with one hand while firmly jerking with
the other. Yusuke wasn’t very loud in his vocalizations, but it was more of a
constant, with him sighing almost directly into Akechi’s ear. He came with a
soft groan and mumbled praise, tugging at Akechi’s hair hard enough that he
cried out too.
He hadn’t meant to do that, but Akechi didn’t seem to care, too blissed out. He
found his underwear and cleaned his fingers with it, before banishing it to the
floor too. Then he settled closer to Yusuke, letting out a heavy sigh. Yusuke
knew there was no use in talking to him in this state, and he was out within
seconds. Listening to Akechi breathing deeply, he felt wholly satisfied with
this as a confirmation of their relationship. There would even be the standard
walk of shame back to his dorm room with either the clothes he wore the night
before, or something of Akechi’s. Locking his arms around him protectively, he
thought of the scars he found. They seemed to be on the older side based on how
flat they were, but it was hard to know for certain. Either way, this was
another secret he knew he had to keep. He couldn’t and didn’t want to imagine
the kind of disrespectful remarks someone could say about this. The public
didn’t deserve him. Yusuke decided that in the end, he was merely happy that
Akechi had survived whatever it was he had been through, and was here now,
sleeping soundly beside him. The warm feeling of completeness he felt when he
felt Akechi shift in his sleep against him overwhelmed everything else.
 
In the morning, Akechi shook him awake. Yusuke could tell from the amused look
on his face that he had been trying to coax him into consciousness for a while
now. His hair was still damp from the shower, and he was only in his boxers.
“Hey, good morning. I forgot to set my alarm, so we’re going to be really late
to the festival if you don’t get moving. Sorry, I would have liked a little
more time to lay around with you, but y’know. We have to get back to your dorm
so you can get your uniform on. Oh, also I took out a new toothbrush for you.
It’s blue.” Akechi said in quick succession. Yusuke felt a rush of affection
looking at him, and dragged him down into a crushing hug.
“You’re amazing. I’m so glad we’re in this... official kind of arrangement.” He
said groggily. Akechi chuckled and kissed Yusuke’s cheek.
“Me too. Now let me go and get out of my bed, you absolute idiot.”
 
Yusuke was punctual about cleaning himself up, and throwing on some of Akechi’s
clothing that looked innocuous enough that it could have belonged to either of
them. The only issue was that his trousers were ever slightly too short. Akechi
insisted that cuffed trousers were in style and rolled them up a bit further,
but both of them kept exchanging glances that said they were both mildly
concerned with the idea of someone else clocking the sudden shift in their
relationship. It went without words that if the public knew about the line that
Yusuke had crossed in their darling detective’s life, there would be absolute
scandal.
---------
“Are we Romeo and Juliet?” Yusuke mused, spontaneously voicing his thoughts, as
he tended to do. Akechi, who was wearing a medical mask again, still looked a
bit spooked, as Yusuke had been mostly quiet until now. They were rounding the
corner to Kousei now, and the two of them kept a self-conscious space between
them. Yusuke was carrying his things in a plaid laundry bag. The mask obviously
didn’t fool everyone. Some even seemed to have started to observe that Akechi
was starting to become a regular around here. A couple of girls darted inside
to fetch friends, so that they could gawk in a group. That didn’t help the
sudden anxiety of the situation any.
“That’s kind of a… depressing thought, don’t you think?”
“I meant it mostly in a romantic sense, of lovers from different, opposing
worlds. But I suppose I shouldn’t force the comparison.”
“I know you mean well.” Akechi answered soothingly. “I just don’t like the idea
that we’re doomed to misfortune and heartbreak by virtue of who we are.”
Yusuke looked like he wanted to say something, but he took one glance at their
surroundings, and shook his head, opting to speak up again once they were
safely closed inside his room.
“You don’t feel that we made a rash decision, right? Neither of us have much
experience with this kind of commitment. I just want to trust that we are wise
enough to figure it out.” He said, as he was peeling off the sweater Akechi had
leant him. Yusuke glanced his way, troubled to find Akechi frowning sullenly at
the floor, mask pushed down.
“I don’t know, Yusuke. Look, I can’t talk about this right now. I have to get
into the mindset for the festival, and this just makes me nervous. I don’t want
you to ever think of me as a mistake, but I can’t promise you that this will be
easy for you.” He adjusted his gloves minutely, leaning against Yusuke’s desk.
Yusuke pulled a clean shirt from his wardrobe, slipping it on without buttoning
it yet, and moved to rest a hand on Akechi’s cheek. Akechi refused to look up,
lost in his head.
“Don’t concern yourself with whether or not this will be easy or difficult for
me. Or how long or short we will last. I want to take things day by day with
you. I was thinking about it, while you were drying your hair this morning.
Just, watching you… In a way I realized nobody else probably has before. The
feeling at the center of this is that I don’t want you to be alone, Goro.”
Yusuke said adamantly. Akechi finally looked up. He kissed Yusuke once,
lingering for a drawn-out breath of time. One last moment like this before they
had to return to the world outside again.
“Alright. I-- I’m obviously overthinking things. Finish getting ready so I’m
not late.” Akechi pulled away, and smiled, but Yusuke knew him well enough by
now to know something of that dark mood was still residing under the surface.
He felt uneasy, but couldn’t express it now that the conversation had been
effectively concluded.
 
They decided that Akechi should arrive at Shujin ten minutes before Yusuke. In
the meantime, Yusuke went to get coffee from a vending machine in the nearest
train station. Arriving at the same time was a bit… suspect. Especially now
that the bruise on Yusuke’s neck had been aggravated enough to increase in size
and covering it with a band-aid would mean using an entire adhesive pad that
would read less “nicked while shaving” and more “stabbed in the jugular”.
Coming up with a salient excuse for it would take some time. Or there was
always the option of not excusing it at all. Yusuke didn’t care so much
anymore. It wasn’t like most people would know who did this to him.
However, the reaction of the rest of his friends was predictable. Akira only
nodded knowingly at him, but Ann and Ryuji were beside themselves with the
temptation to interrogate Yusuke about it, but under Makoto’s watchful glare,
they knew they couldn’t say anything. Lest it devolve into more yelling about
Akechi.
“Later.” Yusuke promised.
“Yeah, that’s what you said yesterday though.” Ann sighed. Futaba approached
Yusuke with a glare, and he braced himself to have to defend himself from
whatever accusations she might have for him but instead she just sort of
grumbled at him.
“Akira told me you were in his apartment. Just lemme know if you want to put
any wiretaps in there.” She said, aloof.
“What? I would never…”
“And you see, that’s the difference between you and me, Inari-buddy.”
 
The panel started with an excitable crowd of students who didn’t quite seem
amenable to Makoto’s request for everyone to settle down. Akechi was humble in
introducing himself, but there was a certain mania surrounding his reception
that disturbed Yusuke. It was such a common trend these days for people to
mistake current events for entertainment, when there was a lot more at stake
than being bored. People had actually died. More than that—a friend of his lost
her father. This wasn’t a TV drama, and Akechi wasn’t an actor.
Makoto launched into her “interrogation” smoothly. She had definitely spent a
lot of time preparing for this moment. Yusuke watched from the side balcony,
feeling strangely detached from everything happening in front of him. Seeing
Akechi sink right back into this role felt strange, as if he flipped an
internal switch, and suddenly the barrier between them was raised again, and he
was a criminal, lurking in the wings, and Akechi was a beacon of hope, being
admired on a pedestal.
“Thoughts…?” Akira asked in a whisper, leaning close.
“He knows.” Yusuke answered. “He knows, but I wonder if… He wouldn’t tell would
he?”
“How should I know? You know him better than I do at this point.” Akira
answered.
The conversation veered dangerously on stage. Akechi let slip that he did in
fact have an idea to the identities of the Phantom Thieves, and Yusuke’s breath
caught in his throat. Akechi teased at the information, ever the good showman,
but then Yusuke found Akechi suddenly making direct eye contact with him.
Without having to think on it too hard, Yusuke pulled out his phone and dialed
Akechi.
“What’re you doing?” Ryuji hissed. But it was done. Akechi’s phone cut him off
mid-sentence and he shot a subtle smile in Yusuke’s direction before
apologizing to the audience and answering.
“Ah. Urgent call from my boss. Sorry about that. Quirks of the job. But hey,
you guys wanted me and not a singer. I’ll be right back.” Akechi dismissed
himself off the stage. Five minutes later, Makoto was on the balcony, beckoning
all of them to follow her to the PE faculty office.
Everyone seemed to collectively decide to let Yusuke into the room first, and
hang around outside the door, watching the reunion between Akechi and their
friend with some apprehension. The panel had left everyone a bit on-edge,
including Akechi, who was relieved to see a friendly face first. Yusuke’s
instinct was to embrace him, which he gladly accepted.
“Sorry. I feel like I lost control of what I was saying a bit up there.” Akechi
said, giddy. “Did you tell them yet…? What I told you, I mean.”
“Tell us what?” It was Makoto, holding the door open as one by one the rest of
the Phantom Thieves filed in. Akechi broke out of Yusuke’s arms and stepped
away from him respectfully.
“He knows. He knows the basics. More than we could have guessed.” Yusuke said,
feeling a bit guilty for not addressing this before the panel discussion. He
was just too distracted by the relationship drama to remember. Ryuji was
obviously furious, looking from Yusuke to Akechi with a barely contained
distain.
“And when the hell were you going to bring that up? After he told the whole
school who we are? What if the police already know? Man, we are really screwed,
and you could have done something other than play tongue-sumo with Akechi, you
know!”
Yusuke rounded on Ryuji and was about to retort when Akechi slid an envelop
from the inner pocket of his blazer, and spilled a stack of pictures on to the
nearest table with a flourish.
“I wasn’t going to say anything, Sakamoto. You have my word. I didn’t mean to
mention that I know who the Phantom Thieves are. It just kind of slipped out,
and then Nijima… was very persistent about it. You saw. If Yusuke hadn’t called
my phone, I don’t know how I was going to duck out of that one. Anyway,
mentioning that I know who the Phantom Thieves are is going to be a bit of a
problem, because you’d better believe my boss isn’t going to let that go.”
“Sorry.” Makoto said automatically, gathering close to the table with everyone
else to see what Akechi had produced. The Thieves collectively vocalized their
dismay, apart from Yusuke, who was silent. Seeing an image of himself
disappearing was a lot more surprising than hearing Akechi describe it to him.
In fact, a lot of these pictures were of him specifically. When exactly did
Akechi start to have feelings for him anyway?
“I have these, and I have a video that I collected as proof. I could blackmail
you if I really wanted to, but I was hoping you might listen to me instead. I
really need your help and expertise.” Akechi said, then launched into his
formal explanation, recounting when he first encountered the Metaverse and the
person in the mask, then relayed his motivations behind finding the truth and
the true murderer.
“Hold on. I have several problems with this.” Akira said immediately, and
Makoto nodded.
“As do I.” She added. Akechi grinned nervously. Yusuke was supposed to back him
up, but was doing a poor job of it thus far, watching the conversation with
interest.
“It doesn’t make sense why you would suddenly abandon the idea that the Phantom
Thieves are unjust and give up on the idea of us being properly punished for
what we have done, even if we do disband after we help you. I’m not really
clear on what your idea of justice actually means, Akechi.” Akira said, running
his fingers through his fluffy hair and frowning at the pictures still.
“I might have some idea as to why that is, actually. And it’s not justice at
all, but selfish reasons. Because if we get arrested too soon, there’s nothing
that would stop us from testifying against him, and if they find that app on
his phone, but he’s evidentially not a Phantom Thief, the suspicion goes right
to murder, and he doesn’t want that, obviously. You can’t delete the app, and
if he got rid of his phone that would be suspicious, so he would be stuck.”
Makoto said, folding her arms across her chest.
“But…” Yusuke interjected, “… if we caught the masked murderer, there would be
no reason to harbor our identities for his own safety, and therefore he would
have to be true to his word in protecting us. Not exactly noble, wanting to
look out for yourself, but perfectly understandable. And now that he knows our
methods, it’s obvious we aren’t utilizing anything nefarious.”
“You’re missing something big here, Yusuke. Didn’t you hear what he said? His
boss is going to know he has some idea at our identities, and therefore Akechi
is either going to have to tell his boss the truth, or lie. Obviously, if he’s
going to have anything to do with us, I need to know he’s willing and capable
of going behind his boss’s back, because as long as his loyalty is with the
SIU, we cannot work together. And we are completely in the position to refuse,
because I promise every single one of us will not hesitate to use your name
liberally in our testimonies, Akechi.” Akira said with finality, commanding the
attention of everyone in the room, and leaving silence for a good solid minute.
Yusuke turned to check in on Akechi and was shocked to see him covering his
face in his hands, his shoulders shaking. Everyone else seemed to be surprised
too. Morgana, who has been watching the back and forth of the conversation
somewhat dumbfoundedly, hopped up on the table and batted all the photos to the
ground one by one.
“Enough. We obviously need a plan. And I don’t know if today is a good day to
do that. Akechi looks really stretched thin. Obviously, this is a lot of
pressure on him, and a lot on Akira too to make good decisions on our behalf.
But I think he’s right. We can’t work with Akechi unless we know for sure he’s
one of us until the day we disband.” Morgana said, tail flicking irritably.
Akechi uncovered his face to look at Morgana.
“Oh…  I saw this cat’s transformed form in the Metaverse when I got pulled in
there with you all. So strange it can still talk outside of that space.” He
seemed slightly cheered by this and put out a hand for Morgana to sniff, but
was callously ignored.
“So, we adjourn this meeting for now, and pick it up again tomorrow?” Yusuke
suggested.
“My schedule is actually full tomorrow, so it’ll have to be the day after that,
but I’ll be there, certainly.” Akechi said, starting to gather the pictures
from the floor.
“In the future you won’t be able to decide when’s good for you, you know. We’re
not at your beck and call, Akechi. I don’t know why you thought asking us for
help was a good idea to begin with.” Ryuji griped, sending one of the pictures
skidding away across the floor and under some hastily stashed equipment with a
kick. Yusuke saw Akechi’s expression fall slightly, and went to retrieve it for
him.
“And you, Yusuke. I don’t even know what to think of you anymore. I thought you
were with us, but you get more distracted by a piece of ass than I do. You
can’t be on his side and ours. You have to pick.”
“Ryuji, that’s enough. It’s not Yusuke’s fault that any of this is happening.
And we do want Akechi on our side. That’s the whole point of this. Having him
as an ally could really help us, especially since we’ve been in such a bad
place recently, and he has skills we don’t. If we don’t act soon, we’ll be
stopped from ever figuring out the truth. You should feel really scared right
now that there’s someone out there who actually doesn’t have any problem with
using the Metaverse for harming people. We are literally the only ones who can
do anything about that. And if we don’t keep it together, I don’t even want to
think about what the consequences could be.” Makoto said evenly. Ann watched
her speak with a rapt expression, and nodded forcefully.
“I don’t like this either, Ryuji, but tell me you honestly have a better idea
because I doubt that.” She looked to him knowingly and he shrugged in defeat.
But the damage was already done. Yusuke held the last picture out to Akechi who
snatched it from him wordlessly, and left the room, obviously uninterested in
continuing the panel.
“Unbelievable.” Yusuke muttered darkly, leaving after him. He caught up to
Akechi easily, who was walking quickly, but couldn’t outmatch Yusuke’s long
legs. He put a hand on his shoulder, but Akechi shrugged him away.
“Stop. You don’t have to force yourself to fix things for me. I’m fine. I don’t
know what I was thinking, asking you to stand up for me like that. I thought I
had it under control. I didn’t think they would come for me like that…”
Akechi’s tone was firm, but it was impossible to believe he was fine after
storming out as he did. Yusuke shook his head, grabbing Akechi’s shoulder and
holding him in place. Akechi flinched, but let him.
“They’re my friends, Goro. I should be able to deal with them just fine. You
didn’t ask anything too much of me at all. Now I just don’t want to see you
leaving in a bad mood. I want to help you if I can. There’s nothing extraneous
about that. I care about you. You’re important to me.”
“I really don’t know what to tell you. There’s nothing you can do. You’re
important to me too and I don’t want to make you unhappy by making you pick me
or your friends…” Akechi’s voice cracked as he said this, and Yusuke could also
hear approaching footsteps. Not wanting unsuspecting students to run headlong
into their emotional discussion, he pulled Akechi into the nearest classroom.
It was empty, but quite unfortunately decorated like a haunted house. It was
dark, and there were black garbage bags hanging from the ceiling, making it
hard to maneuver. Yusuke brought Akechi over to a desk that had fake severed
limbs on it and had him sit there, holding his hands steady.
“I’m not going to pick one over the other. I’m keeping both my friends and you,
and I believe they’ll respect my decision sooner or later. I’m not going to
leave you.”
This completely broke Akechi’s composure, and he hung his head as silent tears
began to run down his face. With a shuddering breath in, he squeezed Yusuke’s
hands tightly.
“I… I didn’t think you would, but I’m just… not used to this. You’ll have to
forgive me. Just—What Makoto said was right. She’s right. And I just can’t—I
don’t want to be called a murderer. I can’t deal with that. My mother, she… You
don’t want to hear this. It’s awful.” Akechi kept his voice low, pausing
frequently to try to stay as composed as he could be.
“Tell me. You can tell me. It’s alright.”
“N-no, but… Yusuke, I’ve never told anyone this. Yusuke… Yusuke…” He repeated
his name like he was praying for something. Yusuke answered by sitting on the
desk with him, and knocking a few plastic limbs off in the process.
“Your mother is dead like mine is. Though not by the same circumstances, I feel
like I can relate, at least partially. I really want you to tell me, so I can
understand you better.”
There was a pause as Akechi collected himself again, rubbing his eyes and
sniffling.
“She… She wrote in her suicide letter that it was my fault that my father
didn’t come back for her. That I was and always would be in the way of her
happiness. So she said I essentially … I killed her. It --  I know it doesn’t
make sense. A four-year-old can’t push someone to suicide. But the kind of
person she was… How young I was… I can’t get that out of my head. And now
that—“ Akechi cut himself off again and just shook his head. He curled into
Yusuke’s side, clinging to him helplessly.
“Your father… sounds like an unforgivable, worthless piece of rotting garbage.
Both of them don’t reflect on who you are, Goro.” Yusuke said. Akechi chuckled
sadly. He was still as Yusuke quite literally kissed away his tears, finding
the gesture stupidly romantic, but completely something he could expect from
his new boyfriend.
“Yes, my father… You really have no idea… “
Chapter End Notes
     It crimas. merry critmas.
     Sorry it took so long for me to update, but I had some issues with
     school/depression/very elaborate Savage Worlds campaigns getting in
     the way for a while. I'm super flattered by all the positive feedback
     I've been receiving so far. I'm glad you all are enjoying this as
     much as I am enjoying writing it. At least there was some smut here
     to make up for the wait, right?
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