Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/760198.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      Other
  Fandom:
      Batman_(Comics), World's_Finest_(Comics), DCU
  Relationship:
      Dick_Grayson/Tentacle_Alien
  Character:
      Dick_Grayson, Bruce_Wayne, Clark_Kent, Fortress_of_Solitude_-_Character,
      Tentacle_Alien
  Additional Tags:
      Tentacles, Discrimination_due_to_appearance, Fluff, Telepathy,
      Interspecies, Consentacles
  Collections:
      Tentacle_Big_Bang
  Stats:
      Published: 2013-04-19 Words: 10368
****** An Armful of Feelings ******
by Sophie
Summary
     Dick gets shot and has to be brought to Superman's Fortress to heal.
     He meets a tentacle alien that he befriends, and also possibly sort
     of starts dating. No one really approves much.
Notes
     This was written for the Tentacle_Big_Bang.
     Thanks to Tali for the SPAG beta, to Toast and Yue-ix for the plot
     beta and to everyone who cheered while I was trying to figure things
     out.
See the end of the work for more notes
Dick can't put any weight on his right leg at all. He has tried, and this is
why he is not currently standing up, but is instead slumped down, leaning back
against a wall and trying to find his breath. He would be feeling guilty about
it and swearing at himself because this is all his fault and he hadn't been
careful enough —if he weren't concentrating on not fainting because of the
pain. He hates how hard it is to make himself stay conscious, especially since
it's not hurting that much. Not in the position he's in right now, anyway. He's
not going to try standing up again anytime soon, though.
He presses a hand against the wound, but he can't push hard enough to do
anything about how much he's bleeding. When he tries to, it sends a wave of
pain to his head that makes everything blurry.
He hears Superman and Batman talking —which is mostly Superman talking and
Batman listening and muttering monosyllables— and he makes himself listen when
he hears his name. It's not enough to make sense out of the words.
He doesn't realise that Superman has moved next to him until the man strokes
the side of his head gently. "Robin? Can you hear me?"
He does and he wants to start crying. He hates that he's feeling so useless
right here, next to Superman and Batman. He hopes no criminals escaped because
they had to protect him after he got shot. He swallows and opens his eyes,
shifting them to look at Batman. He isn't very far, securing the criminals who
weren't tied up yet (Dick's brain isn't cooperative when he wants to count them
to verify they're all on the ground and not running free) and their eyes meet.
He looks worried, but not angry.
"Batman has agreed to let me bring you to my Fortress. It will be able to
remove the bullet and heal you more efficiently than—" He doesn't finish and
looks uncomfortable. Dick smiles sadly and keeps staring right at Batman. His
sight blurs for a moment, filling up with thousands of blinking white spots. He
closes his eyes again.
"Nothing's more... efficient than Alfred..."
He can't look at Bruce anymore, but he hopes it made him smile —or worry a
little less.
"I'm sure," Superman humours him. "We will have to stop the bleeding before we
leave." This is such an obvious statement that Dick wonders why Superman even
told him.
The sound of Batman's cape tells Dick that he has moved closer, too. He's
probably kneeling next to him, now. A mask is applied over his nose and mouth.
"Anaesthetic." Ah, that would be why; Batman has always been a lot better at
being clear and concise than Superman. Dick nods; he does prefer to be made
unconscious before they take care of his leg, rather than faint as they do it.
When he wakes up, he's stunned by how white everything around him is.
Something's moving against his leg— He can't sit up enough to get a good view,
but— Okay, it's the bed he's lying on. It's morphing into... He's not sure.
He's read the files on the Fortress and knows that it's somehow alive, but it's
something else entirely to see it and feel it for himself.
"Uhm."
He's still very dizzy, but at least it's not from the pain. He doesn't like the
way he's feeling at all. He wants to move as soon as possible, he wants to—
"Bruce?" He should have called out for Batman. Or shouldn't have called out for
anyone.
A blur of red and blue is all the warning he gets before he sees Superman
hovering over him. "He insisted on coming using his own... means of
transportation. He will be here within the hour."
Dick bites his lips and moves his head from right to left and back. It doesn't
help with the dizziness —the opposite, actually.
"Go back to sleep. You will be feeling better next time you wake up." This
sounds like a really good suggestion.
The bed-Fortress-thing isn't covering his leg anymore when he regains
consciousness. He also doesn't feel nearly as drugged as he did before. He can
open his eyes right away and see just as clearly as he would in any other
circumstances. Bruce is a few feet away, his cowl off. He's not facing Dick,
and Dick can't tell what he's doing.
Dick tries to figure out what to say to grab his attention but can't find
anything that doesn't sound stupid. He's still thinking about the relevance of
calling out, "hey," when Bruce turns around and their eyes meet. All the saliva
that was left in Dick's mouth seems to think it's a good time to disappear.
"I'm sorry."
Bruce is all over him in a second, his hand on Dick's shoulder in a reassuring
gesture. "Don't." Bruce smiles with his eyes. It makes Dick feel a lot better.
"Kal says you'll be fully functional in four days if you stay here."
It must have been a huge sacrifice on Bruce's part to agree that Dick be healed
in Antarctica. Bruce always deals with his injuries without involving sentient
alien fortresses.
"It's fine. I can go back right now and rest in Gotham," comes the immediate
answer. He's not sure exactly how much he believes his own words, but he knows
this is what Bruce wants to hear. This is good enough.
"It would be counter-effective."
Dick has no reply because it is entirely true, of course.
"I'll try to be here as much as possible in the next four days."
Dick nods, and the wave of guilt is back. He doesn't want to be a bother.
"I'll— it won't—"
Bruce's hold on his shoulder tightens. "No. Not that, either. It will happen
again, to the both of us. It's important to react accordingly." It doesn't make
Dick feel better about the situation.
*
Dick likes when Batman and Superman work together, most of the time. Their
adventures take another turn, the dynamic is different, it's a nice change.
It's also the only time he gets to see Superman. Or— This is not strictly true,
but he doesn't see him very often outside of those team-ups, and when he does,
it's usually because Superman and Batman should be teaming up but Batman is
unavailable or something similar.
Dick isn't sure he'd get to see Superman at all if he and Batman weren't
friends. The superheroes who aren't Batman's friends are never allowed in
Gotham, and even Superman isn't exactly welcome. Not all the time, anyway.
Working with Superman means that, sometimes, he brings Dick flying with him.
Dick knows not to look too excited about the prospect, that it makes Batman
worry about the state of their partnership when Dick talks about Superman too
much. He stays silent when he remembers to and doesn't ask about the other man.
And he understands. He likes spending time with Superman, but he gets how it
must make Bruce feel, because he feels the same way. When Superman and Batman
work together, he's often pushed aside. It's rarely Superman and Batman and
Robin.
Most nights, it's Batman and Robin, and Dick always loves it. Well— sometimes,
he's angry at Bruce. Sad, disappointed... but that's because he's not
understanding enough, or he's tired himself. It's rarely Bruce's fault, and he
knows it. Sometimes, they just need to talk – not that they do, of course,
because Bruce doesn't talk. Or he doesn't as much as Dick would like him to.
Most nights, it's Batman and Robin; occasionally, it's Superman and Batman.
Robin knows that they both appreciate his presence and love him in their own
ways. Knowing this doesn't stop Dick from feeling jealous and lonely,
especially not right now, because he can't help. He also knows how ridiculous
this is, how much it's a bad emotion that he needs to get rid of because it's
unproductive since he simply can't have Superman or Batman's undivided
attention. He doesn't get jealous when Batman pushes him aside to take care of
victims or to talk to Gordon. However, irrationally (and he knows how
irrational it is), he feels endangered by Batman and Superman together, as if
they were going to take each other away from Dick.
Things are different —worse— than they usually are. He's stuck in the Fortress,
feeling like he's healing too slowly, even though he's never healed that fast
in his life. He wouldn't be feeling quite as useless and insecure if he was in
the Manor. The Fortress is... Well, it's alien (unsurprisingly) and completely
empty. Except how it's not and it's alive, and creepy, and he would have liked
to visit Superman's home in different circumstances that would have made him
enjoy it.
He needs to grow up. Everything he's feeling shows his lack of maturity and
nothing else. It's just so hard to look at all of this that way. It's not what
his gut says, not what he is feeling, deep down. He's scared of losing Batman
to Superman; after all, he has nothing Superman doesn't have, and Superman has
everything.
A while back, when Batman and Superman had just started working together, Dick
had worked with Superman to save Batman's life. Batman had been poisoned and
had to rest, and both Dick and Superman had agreed that simply telling him to
stay in bed probably wouldn’t work. So they had devised a plan to make Batman
believe he had broken his leg and force him into bed rest. After Batman had
healed, he had told Dick that he had felt unsure and worried whether Robin
would come back to him after the excitement of working with Superman for
several days. Dick had thought it was all very silly.
Now, with Batman and Superman teaming up more and more often, he understands
completely why Batman had felt that way. It's just another reason not to speak
up about it, confirmation of how ridiculous he's being. He simply wishes Batman
would do something to appease his worries. Maybe a passing comment about how
he's more important than Superman. And if he asks... if he asks and gets
scolded and has no answer at all, it will only make everything worse.
So he stays silent and thinks about it too much.
*
"It's fine. I can walk, no problem." This is not strictly true. He could walk,
but the 'no problem' might be an exaggeration. It doesn't feel any worse than a
pulled muscle, and those heal in a week or so. Dick is sure he could patrol
either way, and that is really all he wants. Two days seeing Batman and
Superman muttering from afar is enough.
Batman knows right away that Dick is stretching the truth and looks at him
seriously. "That wouldn’t be the best course of action," he says with a tone
that clearly indicates that this is the end of the conversation. Not that it
has even started.
"The Fortress only heals me while I'm sleeping. I have nothing to do during the
day."
Batman doesn't look like he thinks this is relevant. He probably doesn't. "Two
more days. Maybe three."
"I don't need to rest anymore!"
Batman doesn't answer. The weight of the silence shuts Dick up, which doesn't
stop him from frowning and pouting to show his disapproval.
Superman talks to him about an hour later. The conversation is awkward. Dick
shouldn't be mad at him because it's not his fault and anger is never a
productive emotion. He has to repeat that to himself a few times throughout the
conversation. Superman reassures him that he'll be fine, that it's only for a
few days more, that Batman isn't mad at him and only wants him safe. It's all
very nice, but it's not what Dick wants or needs to hear.
Honestly, Dick is mad at himself because he does remember why he’s here and he
knows whose fault it is that he got a bullet in his thigh in the first place.
He's had time to think in the last two days and he knows how lucky he is that
it didn't hit an artery and that being healed by Kryptonian technology is
saving him weeks off the streets. He just wants things to be back to normal as
fast as possible, so he can know for sure that he's still first in Batman's
heart and that Superman isn't taking his place. Superman won't reassure him
about that.
The third day, when he wakes up, he's alone again. He's also very determined to
be able to have the best patrol ever when he finally gets out of here. He
doubts there is anything to train with in the Fortress, but he can at least use
his legs a little. He hasn't in a couple of days after all, and they're
probably very weak.
He stretches and tests how much he can move his injured leg for a bit, making
sure that he's not about to do anything that would worsen the injury. He
wouldn't have minded worsening it while on the streets, but alone in
Antarctica? It would be really stupid.
He takes his time, wondering how long Bruce will want him to warm up before
allowing him out. He only stretches for half that time, and he's pretty sure
that he underestimated the time, too. It's not like Bruce is here to watch over
him, anyway.
He's probably out with Superman.
He'd like to be able to tell if it's day or night in Gotham. There's always
some form of light in the Fortress, coming from the whiteness of everything and
probably from alien technology in the walls, so that doesn’t tell him anything.
It's also constantly dark outside, the result of winter in Antarctica, so
that's no help, either. He would know Bruce and Superman are not together right
now if he knew it was the middle of the day in Gotham. Not that this knowledge
should change anything. It's none of Dick's business.
He frowns and stands up to change his mind. His right leg takes it well enough,
and even if he's visibly limping, it doesn't slow him down all that much. It’s
not like there is anyone to look at him limping, anyway. Since he’s alone.
And he needs to stop reminding himself of that fact. Counter-productive. Right.
He's in an alien fortress! Even if it's not the way he would have liked it to
be, he needs to at least exploit this a little. Every time he'd thought about
this, he had figured Superman would bring him here and show him around, and it
would have been amazing and he could have asked all the questions that went
through his head. This, of course, isn’t happening, but he's still going to
make his way around and be just as curious as he usually is.
The room he's in has no doors, it's just open white space that sometimes leads
to more open white space (shaped like corridors, so Dick decides they're
definitely corridors) and since he has no guide to help him around, he's going
to choose one of those at random and go through it. He's been in strangers'
homes hundreds of times, but nothing has ever felt as awkward and intrusive as
limping around in Superman's Fortress.
When he takes a few steps away from the bed, the platform merges back into the
floor. He doesn’t need a bed anymore, and the Fortress can tell somehow. He can
feel the Fortress around him, not... moving exactly, but it has a presence. Or
maybe the Fortress is continuously moving very subtly, and that’s what it is.
Whatever the reason, it feels like it made him choose that particular
direction, like it's telling him that turning right here is the right thing to
do, and the more he walks forward, the better he feels. There's a certain
warmth about things around him, now, and maybe the Fortress is not as creepy or
awkward as he felt it was before.
The corridor comes to an end when he hits a glass wall. It’s not a window,
though: the Fortress continues on the other side. Dick can only see part of the
huge room there, not as white as everything else, spreading right and left.
He’d like to keep on going and get inside that room, but there are no doors to
get any further. There must be a point to this, but Dick doesn't see it.
Or he doesn't until he sees something move on the other side of that window, on
the right. He's definitely curious, now. He knows that this is not the first
thing he should be feeling, he should probably be somewhat worried at the
moment —he thought he was alone and maybe he's not, after all— but it only
makes him content. Which doesn’t make much sense and he knows he should be
puzzled, and even more worried, but that’s not what he’s feeling. Now that he
thinks about it, he’s... satisfied? Maybe? Not quite happy but not far from it.
He gets closer to the glass wall where he saw the movement and presses his
palm, open, against the window. It's not cold, surprisingly. It's warm and
welcoming like the rest of the Fortress. It makes him want to lean against the
glass a little, although he can't explain why.
Before he does it, though, a dark tentacle presses against the glass on the
other side of it, mirroring his hand. Dick's eyes open wide and he backs up
suddenly, forgetting about his injured leg for a second and wincing when the
pain passes through him.
The creature behind the glass removes its tentacle and... Dick feels sad,
suddenly. Emotionally hurt, and it takes him a moment to understand that these
are not his emotions, that the...
He's feeling what the creature is feeling.
"I'm sorry," he says without thinking about it, not sure if the creature can
hear him with the glass between them or can even understand whatever he might
be saying. "I just got scared." He puts his hand back against the glass as if
to show that he's really fine now.
He's (the creature— the creature is) uncertain and scared, and it puts a
tentacle back in front of Dick's hand. Dick smiles, and the creature is happy.
And worried. Dick can somehow tell that it's because of the pain he felt just a
minute ago when he moved too fast on his leg.
"I'm fine, you're not the one who did that," he says, which makes the creature
confused. "Someone else hurt me a few days ago," Dick explains, thinking maybe
the confusion is really a mix of questioning and curiosity. "I’m here to heal
faster."
The creature is just as confused as before, and Dick has to consider that it’s
not understanding any of what he’s saying. Talking is probably not the best way
to communicate with the creature (it's an alien, Dick realises, an alien with
the peculiar appearance of a huge tentacled... something... an alien animal?).
He can’t figure out where the alien’s eyes are, if it has any, so to make eye
contact or to sign something seems like a silly idea. He tries thinking, ‘I’m
fine, this is an old wound,’ loudly like he once did with that telepath they
met, but the alien doesn’t react to that. And then Dick realises... If he knows
how the alien is feeling, there’s already some form of communication between
them. And he’s pretty sure it can also tell how Dick feels because it’s been
reacting to something.
He tries to convey that he’s fine in feelings and discovers that passing
feelings across may be a bit more complicated than he thought it would be.
You're not supposed to go around controlling your feelings and deciding what
they are after all.
He thinks it works because the worried and confused feeling goes away.
And then there are a million emotions, all at the same time, invading him. And
he doesn't know what to do, he doesn't know how to deal or what it means and he
screams. They're all gone and the creature is worried again. It was trying to
communicate with him, Dick realises, and he's never talked that way. He can't
speak its language efficiently and it can't speak his at all.
Dick doesn't know how to say, 'try that again, but do it slowly,' in emotions,
and this is not what he is feeling right now. He's feeling a bit creeped out,
and a lot curious, and disappointed that he's not sure how to make this work.
He accidentally keeps trying to project his thoughts to the creature, but it's
not the same, is it? It's not regular telepathy he's dealing with; it's
emotional telepathy and empathy.
He swallows and decides to go with the flow. He's good at improvising, always
has been, and this can't be more complicated than finding a way to communicate
with someone underwater in less than five seconds because their lives are in
danger, right?
Dick puts his second hand against the glass and watches the creature move to
stand in front of him. It's at least twice his height, and it's hard to judge
how big it is overall because it has twelve tentacles coming out of... Well,
it's not an incredibly large octopus. The tentacles don't have suckers and
aren't placed like they would be on an octopus. They're just very flexible
limbs, and Dick can't figure out if it has a head, or a mouth, or something.
Aliens on TV are all humanoids or shaped like animals that Earth knows about.
Hell, other aliens Dick knows look like humans —or humans with weird skin
colours. This is not that. This, what's standing in front of him right now,
does not look like anything that can be found on Earth. It's probably normal,
too, since living beings transform according to their environment. Dick doesn't
know what environment this particular creature comes from, of course, but it's
probably very different from Earth.
Maybe, that's why it's behind that glass... Maybe, Superman saved it from the
destruction of its planet, but it can't live on Earth, so there are special
conditions kept in that room on the other side of this glass, and it's the only
way to keep it alive.
Dick smiles when it tries to communicate again and does it more slowly, not
overwhelming him. It's just saying hi, and it’s glad to meet him. It's... very
hard to understand everything it says, but it distracts him. He doesn't feel
quite so alone anymore.
Dick stays with the creature for hours, and they converse the way two kids that
don't speak each other's language would: they stumble, they don't really know
what they're saying, but they're happy to be together. After all that time,
Dick still doesn't know why it's here, what's going on with it, or even if he
should stop thinking about it using an impersonal pronoun like 'it', but he
still feels like they bonded a little.
He tries to introduce himself then, realising he hasn't. An emotion comes back
right away, flowing inside him. It doesn't truly feel like anything he knows,
and he doesn't understand. The creature, however, understands that Dick doesn't
and sends him that same wave of unidentified something. It's all it takes for
Dick to get that this is the creature's name, that it's introducing itself to
Dick, too. Dick laughs and says, "Can I just find you a human name? I can't
really talk about you to people calling you..." He sends back the same emotion.
It's surprisingly easy.
The creature most probably doesn't know what Dick just said (not the right
language, after all) but it's very glad that Dick used its name. For the sake
of his own brain, Dick calls it Jesse, because it's the first gender neutral
name that crosses his mind, and he still doesn't know what gender Jesse is. If
it even has one, really.
Bruce once told Dick that he was good at adapting to unexpected situations, and
Dick thinks this is one of those situations where he understood and adapted
well. Jesse understood and adapted even better, though. It’s the one who
realised how to best communicate with Dick, after all. He's not talking to an
animal, even if Jesse might sort of look like one. Dick is aware of humanity
enough that he knows humans tend to decide that anything that doesn't look like
themselves is an animal and not worthy of the title 'person'. However, Jesse is
a person, and Dick is talking to someone. He knows a lot of people discriminate
against aliens, or would if they knew they existed, but Dick isn't like that.
Jesse is just as eloquent as anyone, and probably more intelligent than most.
It understands Dick better than Dick understands it, and it knows how to make
Dick comfortable, how to make Dick smile or laugh, and it's the one responsible
for that friendly connection between them.
He sends disappointment and a promise that he'll be back later to Jesse when he
hears Superman open the door of the Fortress before leaving the room. Jesse
understands. Dick is grateful.
*
Superman asks him how he is first after a brief hello. If Dick didn't know any
better, he'd say he was only asking to be polite and not because he honestly
wanted to know.
"Fine." It's really hard not to feel good in Superman's presence. Just like it
was hard not to feel good in Jesse's. For the first time, Dick wonders if his
powers don't expand to some sort of... What is it that Jesse has, exactly?
Empathy does not describe it perfectly, but it's not a bad choice. Emotional
projection...?
"Bruce will be here in a few hours." There's a pause, but it's for the effect
more than because Kal is hesitating. "We talked about you."
"Oh?"
"We've concluded that if you want to leave with him tonight, instead of
sleeping here another night or two, you could. If you felt well enough." It's
clear from Kal's tone that he believes it's not the best idea. Usually, Dick
wouldn't care and just get away, but, well... he told Jesse that he'd come
back. Not to mention he's still limping, so it would really be better for him
if he stayed a bit longer, just to be sure.
Dick grins and tilts his head. "You don't think I should, huh?"
"Don't take it badly, but I—"
"It's fine," Dick interrupts. "I know. I'm not stupid. I can stay until I'm
healed. I don't wanna end up here again in a few days because I was off my
game, anyway."
Kal looks relieved and smiles back at Dick. "I'm glad you feel that way. I
think Bruce will also appreciate that you would rather recuperate. He's worried
about you, you know."
Dick does, but it's still good to hear someone voice it out loud.
"Did you use your time today to explore?"
"Huh? Oh. Yeah. I always thought that you'd show me around, but... well, you
know. I was bored." Kal doesn't look like he minds, but Dick's still a bit
worried that he wasn't supposed to.
"I'm sorry I was not available for that. Maybe... some other time? Did you find
anything you thought was interesting?"
"I sort of ended up in the room with..." Obviously, the alien's name is not
really Jesse and he can't say its real name out loud. "The last room over
there. With the glass walls."
Kal frowns a little but doesn't comment.
"So yeah. I stayed there and talked with the alien for a while. I sort of named
it Jesse in my mind? But I guess you probably have a name you can pronounce for
it already, so..." Dick shrugs, a bit awkward. "Why is it there, anyway? I
couldn't figure out how to ask."
Now, Kal looks slightly confused, like he understands what Dick is saying, but
has a hard time making sense of the words. "I can't very well let it roam
around..."
"So there is a special type of atmosphere on the other side of the glass?
That's what I thought. It must suck to always be stuck at the same place like
this."
"It's an animal from another planet. A monster. I keep it here because it might
be useful to study and because it could be dangerous if it weren't locked up
somewhere. The Fortress adapted and created a cell that could hold it." Kal
frowns. "What do you mean, you talked to it?" He says, his voice serious,
nearly cold. It makes Dick extremely uncomfortable, considering Kal's voice is
never cold.
It's Dick's turn to comprehend the words but not what the sentence means.
"Jesse isn't a monster," he says after a few seconds, sounding a lot more
offended than he wants to.
Kal sighs. "You can't simply... give something a name to change the core of
what it is, Dick."
"I didn't name it! It has a name already. I just... can't pronounce it since
it's all... Have you ever talked to it?" Dick would have expected some people
to judge based on appearance or to be too afraid to try and start a dialogue,
but not Superman. Superman is a citizen of the world, he's seen thousands of
things that Dick will never see and some that he can't even imagine. He's not
supposed to be that way.
"Dick. I'm sorry but no. It has powerful psychic abilities and can play with
your mind in ways—" Kal cuts himself off, looking away. "Don't let it in your
head."
"That's how it talks!" Dick is suddenly horrified that there is a real
possibility that Kal locked Jesse up because it tried talking to him and Dick
doesn't know how to react to this. Kal knows telepaths exist, and that they're
really not all horrible and evil. He knows, and yet... But Jesse isn't quite a
telepath, and Dick remembers how he thought, at first, that he was actually
feeling what Jesse was feeling. Dick had never assumed that Jesse was trying to
make him feel those emotions, that it was trying to control him that way, but
he sort of understands how someone could have thought that that was what it was
doing.
Kal stares at Dick, and Dick feels completely lost. He feels like screaming and
maybe like crying a little. "You could just let it out," he says finally,
nearly whispering, "and you'd see that it's not the way you think."
Superman's hand on his shoulder has always felt good, but this time, it feels
like a cop-out and like he's being pitied. "It was too complicated to capture
it; I can not risk having to do it again and putting lives in dangers."
Is this the way you think of everyone?, Dick doesn't ask. He feels young,
younger than he actually is, and completely useless.
"Even if it didn't hurt anyone and you were right— people would hurt it. People
would be scared."
And Dick has to agree with this. After all, this is the way Superman feels, and
he can't expect human beings to feel differently.
"Don't go near it again," Kal says —orders— and Dick figures that not answering
is the best way not to eventually break his word.
*
He knows that Kal talked about Jesse to Bruce, but Bruce doesn't say anything.
"Are you sure you don't mind staying a little longer?" Bruce asks him.
Dick nods. If he had been a bit hesitant before, he's not anymore. He feels too
horrible for Jesse to simply leave it behind without at least saying goodbye.
*
When he wakes up, his leg is completely healed. He's alone in the room again,
but now that he knows he's not alone in the Fortress, he stands up immediately,
stretches anyway because he knows it's not optional whether he's hurt or not,
and changes out of his pajamas and into sweats and a t-shirt. He eyes his
uniform when he changes, but decides against it. He'll be more comfortable this
way.
Usually, he'd also take a shower in the morning if he hadn't the night before,
but the Fortress cleans him during the night and he's not going to think about
that more than simply acknowledging that he's always perfectly clean when he
wakes up.
He's sort of disappointed that Jesse isn't there waiting for him when he get to
its room, but he only has to call it (he's a bit proud that he remembers how to
do it; it's a whole new language and he had been anxious that he'd forget
Jesse's real name after using it only once) for it to move from behind a solid
wall on the left to one of the glass walls.
Dick can't help feeling sad when he sees it now that he knows why it's here,
and that's the problem with communicating through emotions when you're a human
that isn't used to it: there's no way he can make himself not feel sad and
control it, and so there's no way Jesse doesn't hear him.
Interrogation, curiosity and worry. A hint of surprise, too.
Dick doesn't try to say anything, just lets his feelings pour out naturally and
hopes that it's enough to make Jesse understand at least part of the situation.
He can't be sure he's done it as much as he wants to, but Jesse answers with a
great deal of resolution and acceptance. Of course— Jesse knew its situation
already, knew that it was locked up and would stay that way probably forever,
so it's not exactly news to it. Dick is the only one who didn't know.
He feels sorry and then a bit better when Jesse's thankful.
And now, he needs to figure out how to ask if there's a door anywhere, so he
can be on the other side of that stupid glass wall now that he knows it's not
there for anyone's protection. Someone has got to feed Jesse sometimes, right?
If Jesse... eats... It's not as though Dick can see a mouth and Jesse might eat
air for all he knows, but he prefers to believe that there is a way in.
Confusion. Jesse doesn't understand, which isn't a big surprise. They're
communicating well enough, but they'd need a lot more time spent together to
really be able to understand each other, and this is way too precise of a
question for Jesse to be able to get it. Or even to answer... Dick doesn't know
what 'go to the right and press this button and a door will open' is in this
language, after all. If the instructions would even resemble that at all.
There's someone else Dick can ask, though. He pushes the flat of his palms
against the glass and mutters to himself while thinking the same thing very
loudly, "Come on, Fortress. I just want a door. Let me through." Talking to a
sentient fortress is also not something Dick does very often, but he knows it
answers to thoughts and needs. When they needed a bed, it morphed and made up a
bed. Right now, Dick needs a door.
It doesn't quite morph and create a door the way Dick expects it to. Instead,
the glass becomes suddenly liquid under his hands, and the next second, he's
fumbling through it and is on the other side. When he turns around, the window
is solid once again behind him.
Dick barely has any time to feel happy about his success before his emotions
are taken over by Jesse's, and it's strong and definitely positive, but also
too much for Dick to be able to pinpoint precisely what Jesse is telling him,
what it's feeling. It's definitely good, though, and Dick laughs and takes a
few steps towards Jesse, surprised that Jesse hasn't moved closer to him.
When the overwhelming feeling of 'yes!' starts fading away, it allows Dick to
understand that Jesse is shy and uncertain about this, although really not
against anything happening, and Dick is okay with this. He can take the first
step.
He reaches out and touches one of Jesse's arms, unable to stop grinning. It's
soft and unlike anything he's ever touched before. It's also all that is needed
for Jesse to understand that everything is okay: Dick wants to be there. Dick
is suddenly wrapped in half a dozen soft, slippery without being wet tentacles,
and pulled up towards Jesse's body. He feels amazing, or Jesse does... or, most
likely, they both do and Dick has a thought about how spending time with Jesse
could be addictive considering how good it feels, even though they're not doing
anything, not even talking to each other right now, just touching. Touching
makes the transfer of emotions stronger.
Dick can't tell how long it takes before he starts thinking again instead of
just feeling, and part of him knows that this is dangerous, but he trusts
Jesse. After all, he can feel what Jesse's feeling just as much as the
opposite, and he's not getting any hint of bad intentions.
Jesse has one of its arms wrapped around Dick's waist under his shirt, warm
against his skin, and when he starts talking to Jesse again, he tries asking it
how it's feeling. Is it okay? Is this okay? Is there something Dick should do?
The first answer Dick gets is something he recognises right away: love. He
feels instantly guilty. Jesse was used to no one caring about it and knew that
it was going to be locked away forever; it was resigned to it and still wasn't
aggressive and mean to Dick when they met, knowing Dick wasn't responsible for
any of it. It's normal that Jesse would develop strong feelings for Dick very
quickly: Dick is its first friendly contact with anyone for who knows how long.
Dick is also leaving tonight, maybe tomorrow night. He's going to abandon Jesse
and doesn't know when he'll be able to come back. Gotham and Antarctica are not
exactly close to each other.
Jesse's enthusiasm fades as it listens to Dick's feelings, and it starts
lowering Dick to the ground, guilty too, although not for the same reasons.
Dick gets a hold on the limb closest to his hand and pulls on it lightly to
bring it up to his face. He strokes his cheek against it, trailing his fingers
up and down the arm.
"I'm so sorry," he mumbles. "I don't think I can do anything."
Jesse starts stroking his back with the limb around his waist, understanding
that it's a gesture meant to comfort. It tells Dick to feel better, that it
doesn't care, that it's still glad he's here. It does make Dick feel better,
and since Jesse is attuned to his emotions, it makes Jesse feel better, too.
It's good that way because he doesn't want Jesse to feel even worse after he
leaves than before they met.
Dick smiles and turns his head on the side, kissing the tentacle there and
enjoying the feeling of Jesse's skin under his lips more than he probably
should, and that's when the tentacle stroking his back moves around his torso
and slides against his stomach and chest. Dick startles, eyes opening, and for
a second, he thinks Jesse's doing it on purpose for some reason, but Jesse
probably doesn’t know how Dick's body works any more than Dick knows how its
body functions, and stroking skin is probably the same for Jesse wherever that
skin is...
"Uhm."
Jesse slows down, interrogative and a bit mixed-up. Dick knows exactly why,
too. It's because part of him wants Jesse to stop, uncomfortable with the idea
of it touching him like this, but part of him is definitely enjoying the
attention and the touches, and that must be weird to try and understand for
someone who talks by listening to and projecting emotions.
A tentacle strokes one of his nipples and his breath hitches. It's definitely
not that he wants Jesse to stop touching him, he realises, far from it. It's
that he's not sure Jesse knows what it's doing and why it's affecting Dick like
this.
Jesse, of course, knows what Dick is feeling even though it can't tell exactly
what he's thinking. Reassurance and questioning are what comes from it —because
Jesse wants to be sure that it's not doing something Dick doesn't want and
wants Dick to know that it's fine. It knows. There's no reason to worry about
Jesse: it does understand. Dick feels a bit ashamed that he underestimated
Jesse and thought it was naive and ignorant. Jesse has known more about what's
going on than Dick from the beginning. In fact, when Dick thought it was locked
up for its safety, it already knew that it was imprisoned. If one of them had
been naive, it was Dick.
Dick turns his head to kiss Jesse's tentacle again, and Jesse is amused. The
amusement turns to something devious when it strokes over Dick's nipple again,
slow and deliberate. Dick could probably help how much he arches into the
touch, but he doesn't want to.
"Are you trying to make me forget that I'm sad for you?" he asks. He gets a
wave of mixed emotions that he can’t figure out in return. He's not sure if
it's because Jesse understood and answered something too complicated for Dick
to get, or if they're both talking to each other, but neither of them are
really understanding much of what the other is saying. Dick finds that he
doesn't really mind which it is, that it doesn't really matter.
Especially when it feels like Jesse is on a mission as it strokes his nipple
again and moves another tentacle around Dick's waist, holding onto him and
caressing his chest and stomach. It's not hesitating anymore, and Dick is
pretty sure that it's because he's not sending mixed messages like he had only
minutes earlier. He hums, closing his eyes and lying back against Jesse's limbs
and just... letting Jesse do what it wants, trusting it not to do anything he
wouldn't like because it will know right away if that happens and, judging from
the way it acted earlier, it's going to stop if it does.
It moves faster, and then slower, pressing harder and then not. And harder
again when Dick moans sadly from the lack of a more forceful contact. It's...
testing things out. Trying to find out what Dick enjoys, what makes Dick
happier. This makes so much sense because, whether or not it enjoys the contact
itself, it's totally feeding off Dick's emotions right now. It wants Dick to
feel as good as possible because if he does, then Jesse does too.
Jesse's tentacles are almost perfectly smooth. They run over his skin with
barely any friction at all. When one moves around him and traces down his
spine, he shivers and opens his eyes a little.
"Do—"
Of course, he doesn't get to ask Jesse with words to do it again before it does
because it knows how that made Dick feel. Jesse strokes up along his spine,
pressing a little harder, and then down again. Dick doesn't shiver quite as
strongly as before, but this time, it makes him feel hotter all over and he has
to open his mouth to breathe.
The tentacle near his head slides away until the tip of it is next to his
mouth, and then it's tracing his lips, and it's not technically a kiss, but it
feels so good, and he's pretty sure that Jesse also likes touching his mouth
this way because it's feeling kind of amazing about it, too. Which is
ridiculous, it's next to nothing, but—
Oh, Jesse's tentacle on his back hasn't stopped moving down this time and it's
pushing under his waistband. He jerks away, surprised, his breath hitching
really loudly. The movement and the way Jesse's limbs are placed around him
make his sweatpants rub against his—
Against his erection because he's hard. He has to open his eyes and glance
down, to find himself staring at a much bigger bulge than he was expecting to
see. He wants to bite his lower lip and also doesn't because maybe Jesse would
remove the tentacle moving against his lips... so he settles on licking Jesse
instead, his tongue flat and strong against the tip of the tentacle. It doesn't
taste much at all, just a faint something that's both sweet and bitter and that
Dick decides just tastes like Jesse and it—
It feels really kind of incredible because Jesse likes it. A lot. And there's
really something to be said about experiencing pleasure and desire through
someone else's emotions.
He can't not do it again, licking to the tip of the tentacle and then down a
few inches again and he wants to shake from how strong Jesse's emotions are. He
does shake when Jesse's tentacle dips even further inside his pants and slides
against his ass and he— he can't say he's not loving this, every second of
this, but he's never— He's only thought about... about anal sex, but—
Jesse understands all of this, though, and if Dick isn't comfortable about
anything more in that area, it won't do anything more. It makes it clear for
Dick, too, as it continues stroking him without pushing in. Dick thinks he
might be sweating, and his clothes are suddenly itchy and uncomfortable. He
starts moving around to try and pull them off, and Jesse catches on and helps,
pulling his shirt over his head and pushing his pants off. Dick's been naked in
front of Bruce plenty of times in the Cave's showers, and even though he's not
awkward around Bruce as he might have been at first, he has also never been
completely at ease. Right now, bundled between who knows how many of Jesse's
limbs, two of them stroking his chest and his ass, he's so completely at ease
he doesn't even think about his nudity. He just feels as if it were always
meant to be this way.
The tentacle that was dropping his pants... somewhere... moves back up, curling
around his leg, and Dick twitches when it reaches his thigh. And then it stops
there, and Dick groans, frustrated, and tries moving towards it, so that it'll
maybe just brush against his cock—
Jesse moves its tentacle with Dick, keeping it just a few inches from where
Dick wants it— needs it to be.
"God, are you doing this on purpose?" Dick hisses, his voice hoarse, and he
realises that that is exactly the case as he says it. He can feel Jesse's
amusement from the way Dick is reacting to its teasing between all the other
emotions they're both currently feeling. It just makes him try harder to get
Jesse to touch him.
"Please. Ah— fuck—" He can almost see Bruce's disapproving expression as he
swears. "Please," he repeats, and Jesse won't understand the words, but it must
feel how desperate Dick is, how much he wants—
It's way too intense when Jesse finally slides a tentacle up against the length
of his cock, both physically and mentally because he's feeling way too many
things, and Jesse's feeling it too, and then Dick's feeling the echo of his own
pleasure through Jesse, and this is— really kind of crazy. Jesse is barely
touching him and he thinks he's going to come really soon.
Or maybe faint. Or both at the same time. The prospect doesn't worry him at
all, even though it probably should.
Jesse keeps moving its tentacle up and down, caressing Dick's cock like it
stroked his chest, nipples, lips and... and his ass... and it's really nice at
first, but it quickly becomes a bit frustrating because it's not enough. Jesse
isn't feeling devious anymore, though. Because. Because, for once, it's not
acting on purpose: stroking Dick's skin that way has worked really well so far.
"N-no, wait—"
Jesse listens. A lot more than Dick would have liked, because it stops touching
him everywhere, worried, and it makes Dick groan. It takes only a second for
Jesse's tentacles to be all over him again, but Jesse's really confused and it
wants to know what is going on.
Dick doesn't know how to tell it, how to explain, so he spreads his legs,
perfectly balanced and held up by Jesse, and reaches for his cock with his
hands. He wraps a hand loosely around it and guides Jesse's tentacle with the
other, curling it around his erection and pushing the limb against his own
hand, currently moving up and down without any pressure, just to give it an
example.
Cheerful comprehension runs through Dick when Jesse understands, and there are
suddenly tentacles tightening around his wrists to pull his hands away, raising
them above his head as they were before. At the same time, the tentacle that
had been rubbing against his cock wraps itself around it, coiling around twice
and then it... tightens. Constricts as it starts moving fast. There's no rhythm
and Dick's hips buck into the touch without any permission.
"Oooh, god." He lets out a high noise and then licks Jesse's tentacle again,
pressing his lips against it forcefully to try and muffle the sounds he's
making into its skin. He wants to bite down on something, but he can't bite
Jesse.
He only realises that Jesse's tentacles are still holding onto his wrists when
he tries pulling a hand to his mouth to bite on it, and he really shouldn't be
surprised by how much being restrained turns him on, making his cock twitch in
Jesse's hold. Jesse even starts loosening his grip on Dick's wrists, and Dick
can tell it had just forgotten to let go after moving his hands earlier, that
it hadn't been its goal to bind him. But then it gets a feel of Dick's emotions
and actually ties him up with his tentacles. Deliberately.
It's really no use trying to stop the needy sounds coming out of his mouth
anymore and he has never really tried stopping himself from shifting and
stirring against Jesse. In fact, now that it's holding onto his arms, Dick lets
go entirely, thrusting into Jesse's curled tentacle faster and faster until he
can't speed up anymore, can just move nearly out of reflex and feel—
His orgasm takes him entirely too much by surprise and rips a yell out of him
as he tenses up, and then falls back into Jesse's arms, limp and breathing
hard, and more than a little surprised that this wasn't intense enough for him
to lose consciousness. Jesse doesn't stop moving right away, slowing down
instead and gradually letting go of his wrists, moving the tentacles on his
chest and against his ass away, and then uncurling the one around his softening
cock.
Dick curls in on himself a little, reaching out to hold onto whatever part of
Jesse he can, and Jesse— Jesse cuddles him, wrapping tentacles around him like
a blanket. When Dick starts being able to think again, he concentrates on Jesse
for long enough to feel that it's just as satisfied and sated as he is. Dick
suddenly wants to know what it is like to be inside your lover's head and to
feel what they're feeling as they have an orgasm. He wishes he knew how to give
Jesse one...
Jesse reacts to this and starts talking, which is disorienting at first, but
Dick eventually thinks he understands what Jesse is telling him: that it's
entirely satisfied and happy and did reach a climax. A kind of climax, in any
case. Dick can't help not feeling entirely satisfied by that.
However, Jesse really is feeling just as incredible as Dick, so he figures
maybe his standards for things like this don't apply to Jesse. Most of his
standards don't apply to Jesse after all.
He doesn't get to think about this more than that, or to start worrying about
how much he's really going to hate leaving once he's healed, now, because he
quickly falls asleep.
He doesn't sleep for long (he's had a perfectly good night of sleep already),
and then he stays with Jesse all day. He does eventually think about how much
more difficult he's made things for the both of them, but Jesse tells him he's
wrong and distracts him again, which is very effective. Mainly because Dick
lets Jesse distract him.
They're snuggling and talking when Dick thinks he can hear something and
quickly asks Jesse to put him back on the ground, finds his clothes, and gets
dressed. It hurts to leave Jesse behind when he leaves its room.
He goes back to the main room where he has been staying so far, and then
wonders if he hasn't just imagined a sound because no one's in the Fortress.
He's considering going back to Jesse when Kal really does come back, so his
timing was good after all.
He lies when Kal asks him what he did today, and he doesn't feel very guilty
about it at all.
*
He should be telling Bruce that he's healed, because he is, but somehow when
Bruce asks him if he's well enough to go back to Gotham with him, Dick answers,
"I'm still a bit sore. One more day won't really matter at this point, so I
better just stay until I'm sure I won't screw up my leg because I went back on
the field too soon, right?"
Bruce looks at him for a while, and Dick is pretty sure he saw right through
his lie, but he eventually nods.
"Yes, of course."
"I'll have the best patrol ever when I'm back."
"I know you will. And you will also have to catch up on that week of school
you've missed."
Dick groans for show, even though he doesn't really mind. He keeps himself
ahead with his work as often as possible because he knows sometimes he comes
back to the Manor exhausted or hurt and that isn't an excuse to fall behind
with his schoolwork.
"Are you okay out there without me?" Dick asks Bruce after a few seconds in a
smaller voice. If there's something that will make him leave Jesse behind, it's
Bruce telling him that he needs him in Gotham.
"I will be for another day," Bruce tells him in a tone that, Dick can tell, is
meant to be reassuring. It only makes Dick feel a bit guilty for lying to Bruce
about this, but he is almost completely sure that Bruce wouldn't think it wise
to allow him to stay if Dick told him the real reason he wants to.
"Has Superman been in Gotham a lot?" Dick asks, trying to sound casual.
Bruce puts a hand over Dick's forearm. "Not a lot, but even if he had, you are
irreplaceable, Dick."
Dick feels a bit like he did the first time he put on the Robin uniform.
"You too, you know."
He doesn't say anything else because he knows that irreplaceable can mean many
things and that Kal is probably just as irreplaceable as he is, only in
different ways. He's just glad that Bruce understands and is trying to cheer
him up.
*
Dick waits for Superman and Batman to leave the Fortress again, faking that
he's sleeping for long enough that he nearly does fall asleep at least twice
before getting up and going straight to Jesse. He doesn't even have to ask the
Fortress to let him through the glass this time; as soon as he presses his hand
against the glass, he can walk right through it.
Jesse reaches out for him immediately and he's got his arms full of tentacles
in under a second —or it would be more accurate to say that Jesse has its arms
full of him, really. He closes his eyes and rubs the side of his face on one of
the limbs, saying Jesse's real name in his head, liking how he still has no
problem with it. He chuckles when Jesse slips a tentacle under his shirt around
his waist, and he's trying to figure out how to communicate that it's actually
the night for him and he wants to sleep when he yawns. It seems to do the trick
because Jesse answers with a very specific kind of awareness that tells Dick it
understands, and also that Jesse doesn't have any need for sleep itself.
Jesse adapts, and Dick wouldn't have considered a pile of tentacles to be the
best place to sleep, but clearly he had to try it before making up his mind on
the topic because it's extremely comfortable, warm and soft, and Jesse's
happiness resonates all through him as he falls asleep.
He's woken up when Jesse moves him around quickly, and he finds himself
completely hidden under its limbs against the centre of its body, and even
there, he can't really tell how Jesse's body works or even if it has a heart or
a brain of some kind.
Not that it matters. He's wide awake right away and stroking whatever he can
reach of Jesse's body while trying to speak to it to understand what's going
on. Jesse's response is too complicated and confusing for Dick to understand,
at least until he hears Kal yelling his name, the sound faint in the distance.
Oh. Ooooh, shit.
In the midst of what Jesse is telling him, he understands that it considers Kal
to be extremely dangerous, and Dick is suddenly aware that Jesse knows who
locked it up, but doesn't understand that Dick is a friend of Kal. They never
did talk about how Dick had ended up there. It's hard to make Jesse understands
that it really, really needs to let Dick go and stop trying to protect him
because Dick is panicked and worried for Jesse, and he can tell those feelings
only make Jesse want to protect him more.
Frustrated and out of options, Dick yells, "Superman, stop!", and tries to tell
the same thing to Jesse. 'Stop' isn't that hard to say in Jesse's language, but
it's still a challenge while he's freaking out a little. He can tell that Jesse
is willing to listen, except that it's being attacked by laser beams, so
listening to Dick isn't the wisest course of action.
"Superman!"
"Dick! Don't worry, I'll get you out!" comes the muffled answer.
"No! No, just. Step back. Give me a minute."
The sounds stop, Jesse is immobile again, and Dick can breathe and calm down
enough to spend the required time to clear his mind and talk to Jesse.
Jesse is really lost and unsure, but willing to admit that Superman has stopped
attacking it, so maybe he won't try and hurt Dick. When it opens up its
tentacles to let Dick out, it's still on edge and careful, ready to act if
needed.
"Dick!" Kal yells, moving towards him.
"Nonono! Stay where you are!" Dick reaches out for one of Jesse's limbs,
stroking it slowly, trying to be reassuring. What else could he try to make
Jesse understand that Superman doesn't want to hurt him? He tries friendship,
but communicating friendship is not what Dick thought it'd be, and he ends up
just passing along love. It calms Jesse down right away, although it's not what
Dick had intended.
"Dick?"
"I'm trying to tell it that you don't want to hurt me," Dick mutters, frowning.
"That I don't want to hurt you?"
"You made a really bad first impression when you locked it up. It thinks you're
dangerous."
Kal looks at him like he thinks Dick is crazy, but at least he does stay where
he is while Dick is talking to Jesse. Jesse's bright; it understands the
situation fast enough, even though Dick wishes he were better at communicating
that way.
"Dick! Get away! It's trying to get inside my head!"
Dick sends confusion and questioning to Jesse, who is just as confused as Dick.
It says its name in Dick's mind, and Dick understands.
"I think it just said hi? It introduced itself."
There is a long silence, during which Dick wonders if Kal is currently talking
to Jesse himself. He doesn't dare move or say anything. Eventually, Kal sighs.
"I'll have to try talking to it some other time. I... may have misjudged it.
When I first met it."
"Yeah, maybe you should do that," Dick answers, a small smile tugging on the
corner of his lips. Now that the rush is wearing off, he realises he's still
really tired. "Is it the middle of the night?"
"Yes. I only left a few hours ago."
Dick nods. "Everything's okay? I can go back to sleep?"
He's not making any move towards the glass and Kal scowls for a second. "You
should probably sleep in the bed," he tells Dick, and it's the first time Dick
has found Kal's tone to be condescending.
He's about to answer when the Fortress makes a bed, right here in Jesse's room.
Kal does not look like he thinks this is funny at all.
"So the Fortress is in on this?"
"The Fortress let me in through the glass."
Dick could swear that Kal is biting his tongue to stop himself from talking
without thinking first. "Fine. But we will have to talk about this tomorrow.
With Bruce present."
Dick swallows and Kal leaves him behind. Even though he's tired, he's also back
to being stressed out and worried and is certain he won't be able to sleep for
the rest of the night. That is, until Jesse curls its arms around him and pulls
him close. Dick falls asleep, feeling safe and loved.
End Notes
     Glovered drew awesome art of Dick and Jesse here! Check it out!
Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed
their work!