Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/ works/12693078. Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: Underage Category: M/M Fandom: The_Walking_Dead_(TV) Relationship: Carl_Grimes/Rick_Grimes, mentioned_Lori/_Shane Character: Carl_Grimes, Rick_Grimes, Other_Characters_Mentioned, Shane_Walsh, Lori Grimes Additional Tags: Consensual_Underage_Sex, Underage_Sex, Father-Son_Relationship, Father/ Son_Incest, Hurt/Comfort, First_Kiss, First_Time, Shane_Walsh_Being_an Asshole, Top_Rick_Grimes, Bottom_Carl_Grimes, First_Love, Daddy_Kink, Eventual_Smut, Romance Stats: Published: 2017-11-11 Updated: 2018-03-21 Chapters: 3/? Words: 4799 ****** A Father's Love ****** by Arcane_Angel Summary Carl always wondered about his family- about himself. He always wondered why his eyes were blue and his parents’ were brown. Why his asshole of a father, Shane, and him never bonded the way he felt they should have. When Lori reveals a family secret, during an argument, instead of being struck by despair, everything falls into place. Rick was the man Carl always wanted in his life, and now that he is in it- Rick and Carl are inseparable, and find that they love each other in more than one way. Notes Hello! This is my first Carl x Rick story, so please let me know how you feel about it so far! I hope to update as often as i can but please be lenient with the update times- i don't exactly have a set in stone schedule for this! (Disclaimer: this is a male x male story featuring an incestuous relationship so if you aren't here for that sort of thing then you should probably avoid reading this. ) ***** Daddy Issues ***** “What the hell do you mean Shane isn’t my father?” Carl shouted, pointing an accusing finger at the man he despised. It wasn't earth shattering - in fact he was glad. SO glad to not be related to an asshole like him. Shane was the type to deprive him of fun, normal childhood bliss, and any form of affection. In fact, he scolded Lori for “babying” him as a little boy. Hearing that the man wasn’t actually his dad was relieving. He just hoped it wasn’t a joke. It wasn’t. He could tell from the regretful look in Lori’s eyes that it was an accidental slip of the lip - one she had no intention of telling him during the heat of the argument. Needless to say, the feud was over, as she walked away into the bedroom. “I didn’t intend to tell you this way.” she said with her head down as she passed her shocked son. Shane, walked out the front door, not wanting to be apart of the conversation about to follow. Carl stood there alone, thinking. He had always wondered. Lori and him had too many similarities for them to be unrelated but him and Shane had no similar characteristics. He always wondered how he got such a bright blue eye color when his parents’ eyes were brown. He always wondered why he didn’t love Shane- why he didn’t feel like there was anything between them. If Shane really wasn’t his father then who was? Why wasn’t he in the picture. Carl was left in a daze but he was quickly blinking in reality when Lori returned, holding a stack of multicolored, unopened cards. There were fifteen in total. “One for each birthday.” Lori explained. “He sent one every year.I kept them all- i didn’t know when I should tell you, so i just kept them til’ the time came.” She handed him the baby blue one at the bottom of the stack first. Hesitant to open it, he eventually slid the colorful, pretty little card out that said “happy first birthday” that was when Carl felt his eyes water. He went through every word, brushing away the dollar bills so he could read the hand written part in the bottom corner aloud to his mother, who stood with her hands folded in front of her face, holding back tears. “I remember seeing your first breath, first tooth, and first smile . I only wish I could have been there for your first birthday too. I love you so much, Carl. I think about you every day. Happy birthday, baby boy. Love, your father, Rick Grimes.” Carl felt a lump grow in his throat as he read, and by the time he finished, he was choking back his own tears. After all the years of telling Lori how he hated Shane- how he wished he wasn’t his dad,he didn’t know how to feel about this. “Why didn’t you tell me about him- about Rick?” Carl asked, closing the card, and reaching for the second one to tear the paper off of. Lori’s words shook as she spoke, “Carl,” she said, “I didn’t want to tell you about him because it was my mistake. Rick was a fantastic man- the best man i’ve ever met.… but i chose Shane over him while Rick and I were together, and left with him. I had your last name changed to Walsh later on once Shane and I were married. You were only nine or teen months old then….” She wiped away a tear. “Carl Grimes..” He tried, already feeling like it fit much better than Walsh. He was angry at Lori for choosing Shane over this man, despite never have meeting him. He wanted to meet him. He wanted it more than anything, and reading each card only confirmed it more. The man thought about him daily it seemed. He said such sweet things- spoke words that Shane never did even though he raised him. He wanted to meet Carl too. Just reading what he had to say was proof enough of that. What angered him more, was that Lori chose to hide this part of his life because she made a mistake of cheating on him with Shane. He wasn’t going to sugar coat it. He knew what his mom did after she said it. “When can I meet him?” Carl asked in a permissionless way. She couldn’t stop him from seeing him after this. They both knew it. “I can email him. He doesn’t live too far away. An hour or so tops.” Carl nodded. It was settled. - - - - - - -- -- - - --   Carl was full of so many questions over the following days. Having another dad was something he couldn’t exactly wrap his mind around yet. Having a confirmation about meeting him in a week was unbelievable too. He felt so unprepared- like for an important, life changing test. Everytime he was in a room with Lori, he’d ask her a question about him. Shane wasn’t thrilled, but he didn’t dare say anything. It was partially his fault they were dealing with it. “What does he look like?” “It’s been nearly fifteen years Carl, I can’t say for sure now. You two have the same eyes though.” “Was he attractive?” “I thought so.” Shane gave her a pointed look. ------------------------------- “What does he do?” “He’s a police officer Carl, now focus on your homework.” “Does he carry a gun? Has he ever shot someone?” “Yeah- that's part of the job. Quit distracting yourself. “ “Has he ever been shot?” The questions were endless, and eventually, Lori brought it upon herself to tell Carl to ask him about it himself when they met. It gave Carl butterflies in his stomach, causing him to go quiet. He had mentally prepared a huge list of things to ask him, but when the time finally came, every single thing he wanted to say and ask were flown out the window on the way there. The silence of the car ride was deafening for Lori, but Carl, staring out the window at the trees, didn’t mind, or even seem to notice. He was far too preoccupied trying to calm himself, and his noisy mind from all of the irrational fears clinging to him last minute. When they arrived to the house, Carl was impressed. The house was nice; two stories and out away from the city. Nice landscaping too. It was impressive, but the numbing fear swelling up inside didn’t let him appreciate it the way he should have. The fear was immediately melted away when he noticed an attractive man in uniform approaching his side of the car, tipping his hat to Carl with a welcoming smile. With his heart pounding, the teen looked up at the man’s beautiful blue eyes, that mirrored his own so perfectly, offering a coy grin in return. The blush spread across his face did no justice to hide his initial reaction to Rick Grimes. The man was hot as fuck. Rick felt similarly when he approached with a nonchalant caution. His eyes never once looked in Lori’s direction, being too focused on the gorgeous young man in the passenger seat. This is Carl? His son? He was fucking beautiful. His smile only widened when he reached the car door and noticed the boy’s own perfect little lips pulled upward. God he was breathtaking. Keeping his composure, the man greeted him, “It’s great to finally meet you, Carl. I’ve been waitin’ for this day for a long time.” Carl couldn’t look away. He tried to memorize every detail of the man’s face. The handsome, masculine scruff lining his lips and jaw, his familiar eyes, hidden by the shadow of his sheriff hat. “It’s great to meet you too. I’ve been dying to meet you since i found out” He finally managed to say. Rick, quite satisfied with the boy’s answer, opened the door for Carl, and the young man came out eagerly, barely listening to Lori when she told him what time she was going to pick him up. Once Carl watched his mother leave, he felt perfectly comfortable being left with Rick. He already felt a connection to him. It was different than with Shane, and the intense feeling in his chest confirmed that. When he looked back up to Rick, he noticed the way his eyes trailed over him, the way Carl had looked at him when he came to the vehicle. He smiled again, and followed when Rick motioned him to follow. “Come on, lemme show you around, huh?” ***** Rick ***** Chapter Summary Rick gives Carl a quick tour of the house, during which time the two get more acquainted, and find out they have a number of similarities. They both quickly understand that their relationship would become more than average, and what they have been missing out on for much of their lives. Rick started off with a quick tour of the house and property, figuring that Carl and him could chat along the way. They started off by Rick’s vegetable garden, and talked about their favorite foods, which happened to be the same. Ending up around the house and discussing more favorites, both of them were sort of amazed by how much they had in common- and not just physically. They had similar mannerisms and senses of humor that neither of them could fully explain. They had the same taste in shows, music, and complementing styles. Carl was elated by this. He always felt like the black sheep of his family for not liking anything the other two were interested in. He felt like he understood why now, and was beyond okay with it. Rick was really quite perfect after all. He was so kind, gentle, knowledgeable and understanding. The man just seemed genuinely interested in what he had to say, but likewise, so was Carl. it wasn’t just because of what Rick had to say. It was how he said it. How he looked. How he wanted to give Carl as much as he could in a short period of time. Carl appreciated this, and couldn't help but feel like he wanted to share more in return. Rick took to Carl easily. He was nervous at first but then everything felt natural- like Carl was meant to be at his side, looking up at him in such an endearing way. He had always imagined Carl being the perfect little boy, but this was even better than he ever imagined. Carl was well mannered, shy but confident, incredibly attractive with his pale skin, bright, curious eyes and plump lips. Mostly, he loved the way Carl looked up at him as he spoke, like he was trying to hold onto every word. Honestly, it was hard not to admire every detail about the other as they walked back around the front. Strolling around outside came to an end when they got back to the porch. When they were finally inside the house, Rick found that the surroundings suited Carl as well. He fit in with the decor, like the missing piece he'd always searched for. Rick offered his boy a drink, to which Carl accepted. He handed him a can of soda, allowing their fingers to touch as the drink slipped between their hands. “Thanks.” Carl meekly smiled, looking around the house as he popped the tab and took a drink. “Its nice here. I like it.” “Yeah? Well you are welcome here whenever you want. It’s a three bedroom, so I got plenty of space too.” Rick hinted. He didn’t want to blatantly offer him a room, especially so early on, but to be fair, they both knew they would be spending a lot of time together now. “Really? Thanks… I’d like to come back again if that’s okay.” “ it's more than okay, Carl.” Rick smiled, taking his hat off, placing it on the counter by his keys. Noticing Carl’s attention to it. The man smirked. “Wanna try it on?” Carl’s eyes brightened up once more. “Can I?” Rick’s smile didn’t fade as he placed the hat on his son’s head, chuckling from the adorable sight. Carl adjusted the hat and had Rick take him to the bathroom down the hall to look in the mirror at himself. “Looks good on you.” Rick commented, quite honestly.. Carl ate up the complement as he observed the reflection. “You think so?” He purred, his tone teasing. Rick nodded proudly, daring to place his hand on the back of Carl’s neck gently, stroking the locks of hair that covered it. "I'd say so." Carl shivered from the brief touch, and looked up at Rick. “I think the uniform looks good on you though.” They both cracked a smile at that- their eyes not leaving each others when Rick raised a brow. They both understood that complementing appearances wasn't wrong, but the expressions they wore as they spoke portrayed something else that perhaps, was wrong . But then again, some of the conversations they began having when they found themselves on the couch were borderline inappropriate. ----------------- “So you’ve really never had a girlfriend before?” Rick tilted his head, questioning his son’s experience. He was such a cute kid. It was sort of hard to believe that he hadn’t gone on a date before. “No…” Carl admitted, looking up at Rick. He had a reason he never had a girlfriend. One he kept hidden from his parents - hidden from Shane. “...Boyfriend?” Rick tried gently. Carl snapped his head up with surprise, a guilty blush forming at his cheeks. “I’ve never had one… Mom and Dad- or uh..Shane-" he corrected, "Well, they don't even know i’m gay.” “Really? Why’s that?” Carl looked down, trying to come up with an answer he was toying with the rim of Rick's hat, now in his lap, as he spoke, "Well, Shane would probably freak out for one thing... hes not the most accepting person in the world." Carl was unsure how Rick would even feel about it, but at the very least, he was relieved that the man finally knew something so personal, that his own parents didn't even know about. “Not accepting, huh? Sounds like he can be... .” Rick trailed off, not wanting to say something Carl would find offensive. "An asshole?" Carl said boldly, amused by the upturned brow and smile Rick wore upon hearing him curse. "Not my words exactly, but...yeah. " Rick chuckled. "Well he is... I like you a lot more than him already..." Carl admitted, but tried to turn it into a joke." You don't yell at me when I cuss. " Rick laughed a bit, "is that the only reason? " "Nooo..." Carl looked back down to the hat, trying to hide the blatant, 'I have a crush on you' smile he couldn't seem to get rid of. "Oh, Really?" Rick got the hint immediately, but saved Carl the embarrassment of pointing it out by changing the subject to their original topic again. “But jokes aside, about the boyfriend thing, Carl- For what it’s worth, you’re a really cute kid. I doubt you’ll have any trouble getting someone good.” “Yeah? Well you are pretty good looking yourself. How come you’re single?” By now they both sort of knew this wasn’t just father-son curiosity anymore, but neither said anything against it, and for a moment, they just eyed each other for any sign of discomfort before Rick continued. “Just haven’t met anyone worth keepin’ around up til’ now.” he explained honestly. “Speaking of which, i’m really not looking forward to you leaving in an hour.” “Yeah..I’m not either.” Carl said, looking up at Rick, his grin fading while they looked at one another. He wanted to stay for awhile longer. He wasn’t ready to go. There was still so much he wanted to talk about. “Do you really have to go?” He finally asked sadly,” I mean, I’m off tomorrow and it’s only Saturday. You could stay the night, if it’s alright with your mom. I could bring you back tomorrow. “ “Really!? You wouldn’t mind?!” Carl loved the idea. Rick was glad he wasn’t the only one who liked the possibility. “Of course i wouldn’t mind. I’d love to spend as much time with you as i can.” “ I’ll text her now!” He smiled, pulling out his phone and immediately texting Lori. It took only a minute to get a reply from her. She wasn’t exactly happy, but she didn’t have the heart to protest. She figured something like this would happen- Hell, she knew Carl would get along better than Rick than with her. Maybe that was one reason she didn't want them to meet, She knew Carl would prefer Rick. “I can stay!” Carl gleefully informed. Rick was more than pleased. ---------- Once given the okay- knowing that they had all night together made things even better. Carl wasn’t worried about Lori coming to steal him from Rick, so he quickly indulged, moving closer to his dad, who accepted the new position fully by putting an arm around him. Their conversation from earlier continued, and escalated further. Rick was correct in assuming that Carl never had a first kiss, or other important firsts in the same catagoty. Talking about such a thing brought an intimate vibe that didn’t go unnoticed by either, especially since they were cozily sharing the couch and Carl’s drink now. Carl bit his lip, thinking about what it would be like to have their lips touch instead of sharing an indirect kiss through a damn coke. They both grew quiet as the night progressed, and they found themselves leaning more on each other. They both pretended to watch whatever was on T.V. when in reality they were both waiting for the other to make something happen. Time was against them however, and it was getting late. Carl was yawning, and Ricks soft hand movements only made him more comfortable and sleepy, despite how fast his heart was still beating. “Ready for bed, Carl?” Rick asked quietly, half hoping he was already half asleep so he could carry him to bed like he should have years ago. No such luck, but he was sure the time would come. Carl didn’t want to admit it, but he was. He was used to going to bed no later than 9:30 and here it was after midnight. “Yeah…” He murmured. “C’mere. I’ll show you to a spare room.” Rick got up and headed upstairs. Carl followed after, and was brought into a room that was fairly empty except for a made bed with a couple tables next to it. “Yeah, it’s not much, but the furniture came with the house so I just kept it that way.” he explained. “It’s fine, i like it.” Carl said honestly. The bed was bigger than his own, and looked plush and comfy. Turning back to Rick, he added, “Thanks for letting me stay here…Meeting you has been..amazing.” Rick grinned, “Yeah, it really has been. You’re really somethin’ special Carl. Goodnight.” He made his way towards the door. “Wait- Rick-” Carl called after, butterflies fluttering in his stomach again. “Yeah?” He paused at the door frame. “Um, if it’s okay… could i hug you?” Carl asked shyly, looking up at him with uncertainty. Rick instantly went back into the room. His arm’s immediately found their way around his boy’s slender frame, and felt Carl curl his own arms around him in a tight embrace. Both amazed by how perfectly their bodies fit together. Carl melted into the hug and snuggled himself into the man’s chest, inhaling his woodsy scent “Mm.. Dad…” Carl purred into chest, "I've always wanted someone like you in my life.." he whispered in such a way that made Rick shudder with delight. Looking up at Rick, he recognized the love in his eyes and found his arms snaking around the man’s neck in a moment of naive, albeit uncertain boldness. Rick cocked his head as he assessed what was beginning to happen. "Carl," He asked, "you really mean that?" A silent nod was what he got for a response, which was enough for a warm grin to light up Rick's face. His own arms curled around Carl's slender frame. "Well, now you've got me. " he murmured before pressing his lips to his son's head. “Goodnight, baby boy." Carl met Rick's gaze, a red tint forming at his cheeks at being called such a thing. Both knew they should pull away any second, but neither one wanted to let go first. Something within compelled them both to stay that way. Maybe it was the lighting, or how perfect the day had gone, but before they knew it, their noses brushed together and neither had the strength to prevent the inevitability of their lips connecting. “Goodnight…” Carl whispered when Rick pulled away with the same breathlessness . ***** "Okay" ***** Chapter Summary Carl and Rick have a talk about what happened the night before. When Carl woke up to the welcomed scent of something other than his mother’s god-awful pancakes cooking, he quickly remembered where he was at and who he was with, which had in return, sparked up the memory of last night, sending his cheeks ablaze. For awhile, he just laid there thinking, licking over his plush bottom lip, trying to recall the euphoric feeling of the brief moment when Rick’s mouth was on his. He felt the butterflies again, and he rolled over to face the door, as if trying to give himself any more motivation to go out and see the man. It was then that his anxious, always questioning thoughts crept in. What if Rick regrets kissing him? The butterflies in his stomach turned stone, and a sickening feeling of remorse struck him. What if Rick was disgusted by those few seconds, or even too embarrassed to talk about it? Would he even want to see him again after? He couldn’t live with himself if he’d finally gotten the dad he wanted, only to have ruined everything. He groaned audibly, and covered his red face up with the floral bedspread, shielding him from the possibility. When he got the courage to check the time on his phone, it was the final push to make him get out of bed. He hadn’t anticipated on staying the night, so he felt a little under groomed simply rolling out of bed and going downstairs, though that was exactly what he did. It mattered not to Rick however, when he turned to see a sleepy, adorable, messy haired Carl and flashed another one of his brilliant smiles towards him. “mornin’, sunshine,” he greeted, plate in hand filled with sausage, hashbrown, and biscuits and gravy. Somewhere within in those two warm, southern words Carl’s anxiety melted off, and he managed a coquettish smile of his own. “Morning.” Carl sat down at the table, finding the place even more quaint with sunlight pouring through the windows. It was tranquil here- quiet. “How’d you sleep?” Rick asked, putting the plate down in front of Carl, and afterwards, sliding a hand down the boy’s rough,long hair to his neck. “Pretty Good.” he admitted, looking up at him with his bright eyes, “Thank you.” he said, genuinely. Rick nodded, satisfied. “Good. Hope you’re hungry. There’s more where this came from.”     Carl was stuffed after a fun, laugh filled breakfast. Rick had told him some great stories about being a sheriff, some funny ones as well as serious. He’d even shown him his scar from a bullet wound on his abdomen that he had gotten on duty. Things seemed no different than how they were yesterday, and Carl was beginning to wonder if Rick would say anything about the kiss at all. When the time came for him to leave, and Rick placed the sheriff hat back on Carl’s head, the teen looked up at him in confusion. “Hold on to this for me til’ the next time i see you. Gives you a reason to come back.” He winked, “looks better on you anyway.” Carl took the bait and happily nodded. “So, there will be a next time?” “Of course- if that’s what you want.” “Yes! I mean- if it’s okay with you” Carl exclaimed happily. “More than okay. I gave you my number. Be sure to use it. Text me, Call me whenever you want. We can set up another meeting.” Carl accepted the offer, and already had plans on texting him as soon as he was home. It was when they were in the car when Rick decided to bring up the night before.   “W-what?” Carl did a double take, making sure he heard him correctly, after he’d mentally convinced himself they weren’t going to talk about it all day. “About last night-the kiss. You’re not uncomfortable about it,are you?” “What? No.- God no.” he said, flustered and red faced at the absurd possibility of him not liking what happened. “Cause’ Carl, i’d never want to do anything to make you feel that way. Now, i know it was wrong of it to have happened,hell, you’re my son, but Carl, i could hardly sleep not knowing one way or another last night, and if you didn’t like it i need you to be honest with-” “Rick-” Carl started, but corrected himself,”Dad… of course i liked it. I don’t think i’ve ever liked something so much in my entire life. I was just worried that maybe you wouldn’t feel the same about it.” Rick glanced over at Carl as he drove, “it was really something…” he admitted, “I know i’m not supposed to like it-but Carl, I’m not gonna lie, i wouldn’t mind doing it again. And i won’t- not unless you tell me otherwise.” The young man looked at his father as he spoke, and yes, he wanted it to happen again. And again after that. Carl was new to all of this, and he didn’t exactly know where it would lead to, but even with his insecurities and concerns, he knew Rick was special. He could trust him. Looking down at his lap, fidgeting with his phone, Carl said,” I wouldn’t mind doing it again either…” Another glance. Then a nod of the head. “Well, Okay.” “Okay.” Carl repeated with a coy smile, confirming it. Rick grinned widely, and slid his hand on top of Carl’s leg. “This alright?” “Yeah, is this?” He asked, placing his own on Rick’s, slipping his fingers between the older man’s, squeezing lightly. Rick chuckled,”Yeah. “ They were quiet for the rest of the drive, though they exchanged glances from time to time. When they were on Carl’s street, Rick suddenly turned into an empty lot, and Carl looked at him questioningly. Rick unbuckled and shifted to look at Carl, “If you are serious about what you said earlier, now is the time to prove it, he explained, turning towards his boy whose blush intensified tenfold at hearing that. Carl nodded, undoing his own seat belt to mirror his father. Nervously licking his lips, he waited for further instruction while his heart continued to pound rapidly behind his ribcage. “Relax, if you aren’t ready to-” Rick’s lips were abruptly sealed with Carl’s, and the man was surprised with the boldness, but certainly didn’t protest. Unlike before, Rick he the courage he needed to lead Carl though it, gently sliding his lips against his, sucking them in between his own and teaching the boy what a real kiss was like. Carl was a quick learner. His movements quickly became in sync with Rick’s and the delightful scratch of his beard sent waves of heat through Carl’s body. He felt lightheaded from such an incredible kiss, especially with Rick’s hand caressing his neck. He never imagined it could be this way, and when they eventually pulled apart, he felt as if his breath had been stolen from him. “You like that, baby boy?” With his words stuck in his throat, all Carl could do was nod as Rick kissed his pink cheeks. “Good. Lets get you home now...The sheriff can’t be seen kissing an underaged boy, especially HIS underaged boy- no matter how cute he is.” Carl chuckled slightly and nodded, “Yeah, that might not be good for either of us.” Eventually they found themselves in Carl’s driveway, where Lori peeked out of the window suspiciously, until she noticed Carl getting out. He made his way over to the driver side to hug Rick through the window. “Well, I guess this is goodbye for now.” Rick said Carl snuggled into him, inhaling his cologne one last time before he had to go. “I’ll miss you.” “Yeah..Me too. Not for long, okay? Maybe we can see each other this weekend or after school one day. I’ll text you when i’m home, alright.” “Okay” Carl smiled, waving at him as he headed up to the doorway. Rick watched him disappear inside before he drove off. Once inside, Lori greeted, “Hey, sweetie-How was it?” Carl gave himself away as the biggest grin emerged on his face, “He’s fantastic, Mom. I can’t wait to see him again.” Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed their work!