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[Prologue]

It was the 24th episode of the second installment of Boobs in Blue - The Series. Seeing that the time-travel episode of Police Blue was quite popular the producers of BIBTS decided to do a similar bit. As a police drama Blue had to have the occasional comic relief, like a secondary character goofing off or a stupid criminal caught in the act. This episode was set in the past, the late 20th century to be precise. It was generally agreed that the police drama achieved its highest form in that century.
    The episode had a guest appearance by Mr Big. Big was the regular villain in Boobs in Blue (the comic) and Police Blue (the animated series). Big only made few appearances in Blue Steel, a more adult comic. He hadn't made an appearance in the live tri-dee drama yet. BIBTS didn't need a continuing villain, but with Big in this episode the ratings were guaranteed to be high.

1

The scene opens with Lynnae organizing her locker. She hadn't cleaned it for at least two months and the odor was getting noticeable. After throwing some crusty old T-shirts into a bag Lynnae found a book on the locker's top shelf. It was a birthday gift from Nadia, a fellow cop on the force. The book was thick, heavy, and durable. Entitled Agents of the FBI, the book detailed the life and times of agents in that institution. Lynnae had to snigger when she came across the section on J Edgar Hoover. Now there was a man with more than skeletons in his closet!
    After coming across a particularly funny section Lynnae sent a swift kick against her locker. Her police helmet fell out and landed on her head. She lost her balance and fell backwards, hitting her head on the floor. She blacked out and experienced a far-out dream.

Date: November 1997. The place - Washington, D.C., USA, Earth. Headquarters of the Federal Bureau of Investigations: the FBI. In his office David Talbert gazed out of his window at the cold, bleak sky. After taking in his fill the FBI man turned to face the six agents assembled in his office, the six who composed Blue Team.
    Lynnae Wilcox was the leader. She was 5'1" and her air of authority canceled out her small size. June Parlor, the second-in-command, stood 5'10" and looked much taller.
    Nadia Junker (German pronunciation) was the tallest in the group. Her 6'3" frame would've made her a basketball star or supermodel. But she chose to serve her country instead. Paul Jarvis, at 5'6", was the team's forensic expert. He could also blend in with any crowd, making him an excellent surveillance man.
    Toby Eddings looked rather lanky with his 5'9" form. He was Blue Team's electronics genius. Amber MacRoy topped out at 4'8" and her tiny body could barely contain her energy. She was a living databank of information and a wizard with computer code.
    Then there was the seventh member of the team. Due to budget cutbacks, instead of getting a German Shepard, Blue Team got a miniature Dachshund. Smudge was trained to sniff out explosives and drugs, among other things. Many people laughed at the sight of this little dog. However, those same people had to eat crow when Smudge found a bomb right where the President would've given a speech. Now the little dog was called Smudge, The Wonder Dog.
    Behind their backs Lynnae and June were called the Boob Two. In addition to their training and strength, the two shared another feature: they were quite endowed. June had what looked like basketballs under her blouse. Lynnae had volleyball-sized lungs on her frame, made to look even larger due to her small size. Amber and Nadia had no chests at all, being flat as table tops. They didn't let that bother them. Long ago those two accepted the fact that God gave the bodies they had now. At least the grab-asses learned not to touch them; the other members of Blue Team made sure of that!
    While Amber scratched Smudge�s ears Talbert cleared his throat. "Now that you're here, I can explain what's happening. Mr Big is back in the States. Our sources in Japan indicated that he gave the Yakuza a bloody nose in the fight over the underground sales of used underwear."
    Nadia made a dismissive gesture. "That sounds trivial enough for Big. Only he would show interest in cornering a temporary market."
    "But not before making some money, Nadia," Talbert said quickly. "Big has only survived this long because his business sense is the best in the world. If he thinks he can make money then he devotes his full energy. Now that he's decided to come back to the US, Blue Team will be sent out to nab him."
    Lynnae nodded her head in agreement. "About high time, Chief. That jerk caused enough trouble. After that fake fur caper in Minnesota weasel pelts have replaced mink as the fur of choice. Now those dirt farmers have to import ferrets to control the rodents."
    Amber petted Smudge, making the little dog growl with delight. "Oh, they could've use dachies like Smudge here for that. There would�ve been no rats left in Minnesota."
    "Getting back to your assignment, Blue Team," Talbert said "All of you are going to New York. That city often served as Big's base of operations. Since his personal tastes are known, I expect that he'll be easy to find. Once in town, contact agent Larry Lacher. He'll provide additional support and equipment."
    Upon hearing that name June made a sour look. "Larry Lecher? That grab-ass is still on the payroll? He'd better know we won't take his crap, Chief."
    Talbert�s voice remained neutral but his eyes agreed with June. "Larry Lacher has taken enough sensitivity courses to kill a moose. But some men just can't change. And his daddy is a senator. Larry will just have to screw up so badly that even his daddy can't save him. I hope no one has to die in order for that to happen." He motioned the agents to get up. "Okay, no more pep talk. Grab the next train to New York. Your briefing folders are on Mary's desk outside. Good day."
    With that done Blue Team left FBI headquarters and made the scenic train trip to New York City.
 

2

The stretched limo made its way down Madison Avenue. The passenger in back was playing the stereo at full-bore. He tried to sing as loud as he could, but his aged lungs weren't up to the task. Sylvester Drake, now know only as Mister Big, had a coughing and hacking fit. He did manage to belt out the last few words to the song. "If I could make it there, then I could make it anywhere! New York, New York! Da-Da-Dada-dum... "
    Albert, Big's jack-of-all-trades assistant, handed his boss a glass of club soda. Big gladly sipped on the iced drink. "Thank you, Albert. Every time I come back to this berg I have to sing that song. Half of these businesses owe their existence to me! If it weren't for those goodie two-shoe FBI finks, I'll still be collecting protection money! But now with my newest caper I will exact my revenge!"
    Albert took a small sip from his own drink. "You are great and terrible, oh master! There's no end to your evil. I assume that you'll want to go to the apartment?"
    After downing the last drop Big handed his glass to Albert and used the intercom. "Driver, go to the Empire State Building." Big settled back into his seat, turning on the air conditioning. He wanted to cool off before getting into his secret luxury apartment built in the top of that world-known landmark. The ladies waiting in his bedroom would make any man burn up with lust.

After the train trip the Blue Team checked in at the FBI office in New York. There they met with Larry Lacher. Larry earned the nickname 'Lecher' for his voyeuristic escapades. After the Tacoma case the four females of Blue Team taught Larry to never sneak a look at their naked bodies again. At Larry�s office Smudge made his presence known, growling as he poked his head out of one of Nadia�s coat pockets. Larry was all business when told what Smudge would do to a certain part of the male anatomy if angered.
    After getting some hotel rooms squared away and surveillance equipment checked out the Blue Team fanned out in teams of two. Lynnae and Paul went to scope out the topless bars. Nadia and Toby went to several high-priced �mens clubs� that employed exotic dancers. June, Amber, and Smudge went on a wildcard search. This trio went to a girls school dance. Big had a weakness for watching nubile young women dance. Big was nearly nailed twenty years ago when he spiked the punch at one such dance and was overcome by lust. Big was saved from certain capture by his faithful assistant Albert.
    The wildcard paid off. After an hour of watching the dance the agents saw Big and Albert in a doorway, admiring the dancing girls. In a minute the crime lord and his aide were sneaking downstairs toward the boiler room. Smudge, hiding in one of June�s coat pockets, sensed Big�s presence and made a challenging growl.
    "Easy, Smudge. You�ll get your chance soon enough,� June said, massaging the little dog�s head. �Okay Amber, let�s follow that 400-year-old freak.�
    The agents soon found themselves in the boiler room. The air was oppressively warm and moist. They fanned out with readied guns. A minute later June and Amber finished their search. Finding nothing, they next had Smudge look around.
    The little dog sniffed the ground and found the trail. It led to a section of wall. Dust near that wall was disturbed, showing that there was a secret door. �Yep, leave it to Mr Big to use the old Secret Door Routine. Looks like something to phone in,� June said, readying her cell phone.
    Amber heard a metallic sound behind her. Turning, she saw what looked like a boiler with arms and legs walking toward her. The moving water heater appeared to come straight out of some �30s serial. The silly machine even spoke. �Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum. I smell the blood of FBI bums.�
    Amber emptied her pistol into the robot. The walking appliance fell to the ground hard, smoking and sparking quite a bit. June gave a swift kick to the robot to make sure it was dead. �Now I�ve seen everything,� June said. �An enraged water heater.�
    June�s partner removed the simple breastplate from the machine, exploring the various electronic and mechanical systems. �Actually, June, it�s a BAT: Boiler Android Trooper. Big used them in back in �65 for his Las Vegas caper. He stole all the winnings from The Sands by using several of these overblown tea pots.�
    �Whatever you say, Amber. I�m calling the others. I�ll have this metal man taken back to the forensics lab. Big wouldn�t use BATs unless they�re tied into his plan.� With that June phoned her fellow Blue Team agents. Smudge was still on the ground, growling at the secret door in the wall.
 

3

The morning was bright and clear, a rare occurrence for a November day in New York. Albert finished setting the breakfast table. After admiring his handiwork he then went to wake up Big.
    �I�ll be right out, Albert. Just as soon as I get this woman outta my face.� Big said, his voice muffled by the heavy doors and more. Albert just smiled and went back to the table. In a minute Big joined him, along with a rather shapely woman. After seating the boss and his bed partner, Albert poured out some coffee.
    �Any changes worth mentioning?� Big said between sips.
    �Yes, Sir. BAT 36QQ stopped transmitting last night. Approximately six minutes after we left that dance.� Albert divvied up the sausage patties.
    Big gnawed on his sausage patty, his face crossed. �Darn. I knew I shouldn�t have slipped out to see those teenage girls dance. I just wanted one last look before they blew up like so many helium balloons. Poor old 36QQ must�ve been jinxed.�
    �A distinct possibility, Sir. However, there are more than enough modified BATs to insure the success of the plan.�
    While Albert finished serving the breakfast, Big took a lustful glance at his female companion. Blossom was true to her name. Big liked his women to have �heavy� chests. Blossom�s bust was quite expansive and wasn�t fully covered by her robe. Big patted on the exposed flesh with an age-gnarled hand. �Yes, Albert, yes indeed. In two days there�ll be many women in this berg who�ll be more massive than Blossom here. Just two more days... �

Blue Team gathered in a belowground forensic lab in the New York FBI office. The funny-looking robot was exposed and had probes inserted into it. Toby and Amber were helping Dr Sung and Dan Spirt Talker in the examination. Amber�s gunshots had nailed the robot without puncturing the water tank inside.
    �What can you tell us, Amber? Anything special about this BAT?� Lynnae paced around the examination table.
    Amber shifted her gaze. �Well, aside for the obvious electronic upgrades, this BAT is the same kind in use 32 years ago. We haven�t been able to figure out what�s in the central tank.� She patted the tank. The walls were thin and it sounded full.
    Toby wiped the sweat from his forehead. �Well, looks like we�ll have to cut into that tank anyway. I can�t seem to find any manual valve or outlet. With your permission, Dr Sung?�
    The elderly doctor nodded his consent. Toby then got a small hand torch and proceeded to cut. In a moment a tiny stream of liquid erupted from the tank. Some of that spray hit Amber in the face.
    �Sorry, Amber. I should�ve known that this stuff would�ve been under pressure. Live and learn.� Toby looked apologetic. Amber wiped her face with a Kleenex. After a moment she unconsciously touched her chest.
    �Are you all right, Amber?� Paul said. �Is that Starbuck coffee haunting you?�
    Amber made a dismissive wave. �No, it�s not that. My chest feels hot. Can�t be the flu... had my shot six weeks ago. Ohhh... �
    While the other agents gaped in amazement Amber�s blouse began to push away from her body. In moments her newfound bust surpassed Lynnae�s in size and untucked the blouse from her skirt. Eyes wide, Amber tried to hold her breasts back, but to no avail. By the time they reached basketball proportions buttons started to fly off. Since the tiny agent didn�t need a bra, no such article fell out of her blouse when it finally ruptured. By the time her growth stopped Amber had her arms around her breasts, each now the size of a large watermelon.
    Everyone else in the room look like stunned penguins. Thankful that the growth stopped, Amber decided that she had enough of her friends� staring. �If you slack-jawed gawkers are quite through, can you get a towel or something?� Amber looked incensed. She finally had breasts, but they were way bigger than she ever dreamed about. Dr Sung had enough power for rational thought to get a towel for the diminutive agent.
    Recovering fast, Dan got a sample of that strange liquid and drained the rest into several water jugs. The other female officers gathered around their tiny friend.
    �Feeling okay, hon? I bet those things must weigh a ton.� Nadia placed a supportive arm around Amber. The little agent gladly accepted the gesture.
    �Strangely enough, I don�t feel a thing. It�s just that they�re so bulky. I better sit.� With help from Nadia, Amber sat on an examination table, her massive bust impossibly firm and proud.
    Lynnae returned to the robot and whacked it, a flash of inspiration filled her. �June, you said that this robot came from some girls school?� After getting an affirmative nod Lynnae continued. �And I don�t suppose that this robot was attached to the school�s water system, or better yet the fire sprinkler system?�
    June's eyes lit up when she made the connection. �That dirty little Big! If he�s done this to other girls schools then we could be looking at thousands of girls turned into mammary goddesses!�
    �Exactly!� Lynnae gave another quick tap on the robot�s casing. �We�ve got to find out where these things are hooked up at and disable them. As much as I don�t want to admit it, we need Larry�s help. When we find out where the other BATs are we need his agents to simultaneously deactivate them. Otherwise, Big will just turn them on.�
    �True. Even a few dozen girls blown up by... whatever he used will be a few dozen too many. I�ll finagle the records of the plumber unions here in New York. I�ll find out where and when new boilers had been installed,� June said as she wrote on her notepad.
    �Good thinking. Nadia, Paul,� the two agents were attentive, �you two go see Larry. Tell him what we found, but say that its some crazy narcotic. If he finds out about Amber he�ll just laugh... and come over here to see for himself. And I don�t want that to happen. Comprende?�
    Nadia and Paul nodded their reply and left. Lynnae next turn to her electronic genius. �Toby, tear that stupid walking boiler apart. Find out if it has a radio receiver. If Big plans to start his BATs by radio, we might be able to block the signal with jamming. It�ll save us the trouble of having to manual disable all the BATs at once.�
    Toby grinned like a wolf. �No problem, skip.� He happily started to work on the BAT.
    Next Lynnae faced Dr Sung and Dan. �If we fail to stop all the BATs, we�ll need an antidote to this breast-enlarging potion. Preferably something that will prevent breasts from growing, but have something to shrink breasts made up just in case.� Eyeing Dan, Lynnae pressed on. �Dan, I know that your ancestors were medicine men. If you have anything that can help I�ll be eternally grateful.�
    Dan Spirit Talker made a quick look to Amber. The little agent looked forlorn and despondent. Though her new breasts weren�t heavy, she felt like they were mill stones around her neck. �Don�t worry, Lyn,� Dan said, �I�m sure that the sky spirits will guide me true to find the cure to this curse that Big concocted. You have my word.�
    �Thank you, Dan.� Lynnae then went over to Amber. Smudge was in the room also. He was trying to get on the table that Amber was on. Lynnae picked up the little dog and gave him to his mistress. Amber�s face lit up a bit as Smudge licked her cheeks and nose.
    �I see to it that Big is wrapped up in a rug, doused in gasoline, and burned personally by me. Sung and Dan will have you back to normal in no time. Just hang in there.� Lynnae said as she patted Amber on the back.
    Amber actually had a smile on her face. �Thanks, but these pups on me will be doing all the hanging.� With that the two agents hugged. Just short of the door Lynnae made one last look at her friend. Smudge was resting on the shelf of Amber�s breasts. Lynnae hoped that the two doctors will find a cure soon.
 

4

Larry was full of beans. He may be the most despised man in the FBI since J Edgar Hoover, but now those people who hated his guts needed his help. Dozens of boilers filled with mind-altering drugs indeed! Why, this case could clear Larry�s name and put him on the fast track for promotion. Larry�s senator daddy will undoubtedly pull strings to see that happen. But for now he had to help out Blue Team.
    Nadia clothed her disgust with a practiced face of concern. Larry was a grab-ass of the first order. No female�s behind was safe when he was around. If only there was some way to humble him. Then it came to her. She mentioned the secret door at the girls school where the BAT was found. Eager to help, Larry volunteered to search beyond that door and see where it would lead. Additional time in the field would help his portfolio.
    Later that day Paul gave some protective cream to Larry. The cream, according to Paul, would shield Larry from insect bites. Instead, the cream was an insect attractor. Paul hoped every crawling critter in the sewer will bite Larry and maybe, just maybe, attract some CHUDs*.

* CHUD: cannibalistic humanoid underground dweller.

June thanked the records clerk and headed back to the hotel. No less than 18,000 boilers were installed since January. After selective searches and cross-referencing, the affected schools numbered 48. Public schools were not included since the boilers could�ve been found out prematurely. No, only private schools, especially girls schools, were considered. Big would have it no other way. All that remains was eyeballing each new boiler. June wasn�t looking forward to that, but with Larry�s agents that task would be made infinitely easier.

After getting some background information on New York area pornographers and skin magazines Lynnae decided to see how Dr Sung was progressing back at the lab. After passing the security checks she entered the forensics room and looked around. Toby was still working on the BAT, Sung and Dan were laboring on the work bench. She saw Smudge on the examination table but no sign of Amber.
    �Howdy folks, how�s life?� Lynnae walked over to Smudge, giving the little dog a tummy rub.
    �Couldn�t get any worse, Lyn,� sounded Dan. �Using my people�s magic, a portion of Big�s potion, and the good graces of Dr Sung I made my first try at an antidote. It worked... to a point.�
    Dan actually looked embarrassed. Lynnae�s face showed some whimsy. �Don�t tell me. Amber�s breasts are now the size of basketballs, like June?�
    Sung turned. �Actually, Amber�s bust did shrink, but that wasn�t all... �
    �Oh, can the balloon juice, gramps! Show her!� It was Amber�s voice, but it sounded far away and faint.
    Sung moved away, and Lynnae�s face showed her shock. There, on the work table, was Amber -- all two inches of her. Moving closer, Lynnae saw that Amber�s bust had indeed shrunk in relation to her body. Looking like two cherries, Amber�s hands were able to meet in the middle now. She had on a hastily-made gown of handkerchief material.
    �Alice in Wonderland! Are you okay?� Lynnae stood next to the table and looked down. �Being that small your voice should be an ultrasonic squeak! Not to mention you should�ve frozen to death and have an appetite of a shrew.� Lynnae squatted down, bringing her face to table-level and peered at her really tiny friend.
    Amber stood her ground and looked at the giant in front of her. �Gee, thanks for the observation! Dan said that the potion�s magic, or whatever it was, protected me from freezing and starving. I had a tiny bit of a cookie for lunch. Smudge ate the rest.� Upon hearing his name Smudge wagged his tail. �As for my voice blame that on the magic also. At least Smudge can hear me better than the rest of you. Isn�t that right, boy?� Smudge wagged his tail again.
    Lynnae smothered a laugh. �Dan, I hope that your next potion is more successful. Otherwise, Amber will become the first human nanite.� After that remark Amber kicked Lynnae�s knuckles.
    �Very funny! Your powers of observation are only exceeded by your size,� Amber said. �For that you can carry me back to Smudge. Don�t worry, he won�t eat me. He knows where his din-din comes.�
    �As Thumbelina commands, I obey.� Lynnae carefully moved Amber to the examination table. Smudge walked over and promptly licked Amber�s tiny face. She replied with a few good ear scratches and skin kneading. Needless to say Smudge was in heaven.
    Seeing that Amber was in good hands Lynnae turned to Toby. �Any luck with our tinman?�
    Toby looked up. �Yes, for a change we do have some good news. There is a radio transceiver in this contraption. I just need to run some tests to find out which radio frequencies Big is going to use. And you?�
    Lynnae allowed herself a small smile. �I checked out the local porn scene. If Big is planning to turn several thousand girls into boob women the first people to make money will be the skin magazines, followed by nude bars and dance clubs. I figure that if we can scare some porn people into talking we might get a crack in nabbing Big once and for all.�
    After eyeing Toby�s work Lynnae went back to Amber. She was now resting on Smudge�s neck, using his ear as a partial cover. Lynnae produced a small cloth from her purse and tucked it around her friend. Amber looked up at Lynnae like one would to a god.
    �Thanks. I read Thumbelina when I was a girl, but I never expected to live the part. I�m sure no tiny prince will carry me away, so I guess Smudge will just have to be my loyal pet and protector for the foreseeable future.�
    Lynnae playfully, but carefully, messed up Amber�s hair. �I can�t see a better protector than Smudge. No one is going to harm you while he�s around!� Blue Team�s leader allowed a sly grin to come on her face. �I still need you on this assignment, Amber. Who knows, maybe you want to be as tall as Nadia? We always need women who stand head-and-shoulders above the scum that�s out there.�
    �Thanks, Lyn. But I just want my old height back. Any man worth his salt will value me for what�s on the inside instead of what I don�t have on the outside.�
    �The world will be a better place if people followed that bit of advice. By this time tomorrow I hope to see you in your normal clothes. Take care.� Lynnae extended a finger, letting Amber shake it with both of her hands.
    �You bet, boss. Smudge won�t let me down. Is that right, Smudgy?� Smudge got up and gave another playful lick to Amber. She giggled at the sensation.
    Seeing that nothing more could be done Lynnae left to get a light dinner and some rest back at the hotel. Tomorrow was going to be a busy day.
 

5

The next morning was a cold, drizzling affair. As people went to-and-fro on their tasks Big and four of his women were exercising. Big was leading his charges to the rhythm of an exercise tape. His lecherous heart was also working out. The four women had breasts that were as expansive as Blossom�s. The leotards were practically painted on their busts. Copious sweat marks cover their fronts, revealing the nipples.
    Just before Big started the pushups Albert came in. �Sir, we have an intruder alert. Someone is approaching the secret elevator.�
    �Go ahead, girls. Do a set of 10 reps of five,� Big said as he grabbed a towel and followed Albert. What the four women did was more like arm flexes than pushups. Their busts were that large, and Big really got a kick from their attempts to raise their boobs a scarce inch above the floor.
    Albert activated the security panel and turned on a video monitor. Peering closely Albert saw the man walking toward the elevator door. It certainly wasn�t a CHUD or a city maintenance worker.

Larry hated his life. After going through the secret door at the girls school Larry ended in New York�s underground. He had spent the last 18 hours getting throughly lost in the maze of subway tunnels, connected basements, sewer drains, and other miscellaneous nook-and-crannies. All sort of little critters had bitten him, and Larry suspected that Paul lied about the cream�s effectiveness. Additionally, Larry had the feeling that he was being followed and watched. The batteries on his radio failed and he stumbled along as the flashlight died as well. He was also certain that his fellow agents weren�t doing their utmost to rescue him. Well, a few scathing performance reviews will take care of that!
    He was surprised to find an elevator in this godforsaken labyrinth. He was equally thankful that the elevator actually worked. He pressed the button marked L (for lobby). It took a measurable amount of time, and Larry thought he was in some big business tower or hotel.
    Larry was wrong. The elevator opened into Big�s apartment. Before Larry stood four of the most endowed women he had ever seen in the flesh. His lechery activated, Larry smoothed his Jack Lord hair and turned on the charm.
    �Hi, girls. Can you tell me what floor I�m on?� Larry�s smile was still there when the buxom quartet produced and pointed guns at him.
    �Hands up, Jack, or you�re dead where you stand,� the woman with the pink leotard said, her bust threatening to rip her suit open at any moment.
    Larry Lacher was smart enough to know when he was beaten. He raised his hands and spoke in his most suave voice. �I...sur-render.�

Lynnae and Paul entered the Pole Palace, a topless pole-dancing establishment. The morning practice was going on and Lynnae had to practically pull Paul away from the stage. The owner, one Kelly Fremantle, was as short as Lynnae and had the look of being bathed in grease. After escorting the two agents into his office Kelly started on a cigar, using a lighter that was in the shape of a Hula dancer.
    �Mr Fremantle, I couldn�t help but notice that several of your dancers are quite endowed. Some are even bigger than the boob magazine queens. Surely those mammaries are fake,� Lynnae said, trying not to cough when Kelly blew smoke in her direction.
    �Fake? Hell no! My girls are all natural. Not one drop of silicone or saline is in those boobies. I searched the country all over to get them. Is that a crime?� Kelly settled back into his chair, creaking under his weight.
    Paul took up the challenge. �No, Mr Fremantle. If anything your establishment is violating some fire codes. I noticed that you�re several fire exit signs short of code. That�ll mean some fines, possibly the closure of your place until the required signs are posted.�
    Kelly was smug. Lynnae wanted to pound the man into the dirt, but it wouldn�t do for a federal agent to go around beating people up, even when they deserved it. �If it�s a matter of fines, I can pay them. Easily. What will it take for me to keep my place open?� Kelly opened up a drawer after his little spiel.
    �Bribery is another charge that will be added if you don�t cooperate, Mr Fremantle,� Lynnae said in a cold voice. �We�re willing to overlook the fire code violation if you tell us the truth. The truth on how those overinflated women got that way.�
    Kelly was sweating hard. He was about to speak when his phone rang. Without preamble, he picked up the receiver and turned away from the agents. Even at their distance the agents heard the caller on the other end. That caller was quite loud and the voice was familiar.
    �Listen, I haven�t told them anything, Mr B.... Yes, I know about tonight... These two agents haven�t a clue, and you have nothing to wor..� Kelly stopped in mid-stride. He was electrocuted right in front of the agents� eyes. I was over in a moment, and Kelly slumped over in his chair.
    Paul got over to Kelly�s side. �Even without a degree in forensics anyone can see that this guy is dead,� Paul observed. He eyed the receiver. �I wonder if that�s Mr Big on the line?�
    �It is me, flatfoots!� The two agents were startled when they heard the voice of Big over the phone. �I�ve eliminated a weak link in my network. Too bad you had to witness it.�
    �You�re a true bastard, Big!� Lynnae said out loud. �We�re onto you and, believe me, your perverted plan won�t come true!�
    �Oh, I�m sooooo scared. In fact I have one of your agents with me. One Larry Lacher, to be exact. In addition to holding him prisoner, there�s nothing to prevent me from activating my BATS now.� Big took a short breather, and Lynnae shared Paul�s sense of helplessness. It was true that there was nothing to stop Big from inflating several thousand innocent girls, turning them into breast goddesses.
    �My vision of an empire based on breasts will be realized!� Big said, launching into a fit of laughing that inevitably ended in coughing and hacking. Recovering, Big spoke one more time. �Hey, flatfoots! Are you near the phone? Good!�
    With that the phone exploded. The two agents covered their faces in time. The smoke cleared, and the duo regained their composure. Lynnae got out her cell phone and called the FBI office. Big's caper was now going into high gear.

Walking down a street, Nadia thought of the last nude-bar owner she �interviewed�. The man was quite obnoxious and touchy. He paid for his flighty hands with an impression of Nadia�s diamond wedding ring in his forehead. It was quite a painful way to get a third eye.
    After turning the screws on three additional nude-bar owners Nadia took a quick tour of the garment section. Hoping that she�ll have time for some real shopping later Nadia returned to the lab. Upon arrival she noticed that Toby was working on the BAT. The walking boiler was all patched up, with only a few wires running out of it and connecting to Toby�s laptop, nicknamed Gertrude.
    Nadia was told of Amber�s condition. Expecting to see Amber in some doll house, Nadia was pleasantly surprised to see her tiny friend working on a laptop. It had a pointing stick and Amber was able to move it around and click on the two mouse buttons by stepping on them. Amber was using her computer, nicknamed Betty, in her study of the BAT�s computer code.
    Nadia took off her overcoat and got next to Amber. Getting on one knee, Nadia was able to see what her friend was doing. �Keeping yourself busy, I see.�
    Amber took a break in her work, looking up at Nadia�s face. �Yes. Just because I�m tiny doesn�t mean I can�t contribute. For all of Mr Big�s knowledge he doesn�t know all that much about programming.� Amber waved a tiny hand at the BAT. �I and Toby are almost there in finding the radio frequencies that thing is tuned to. I image it will take only an hour or two.�
    �That�s great. Good work, Amber.� Nadia extended a finger. Amber shook it with both hands. �How about Dan and Dr Sung?�
    Amber sat on her laptop, her legs underneath her. She indicated to a door across from her. It had a large sign on it saying �quite, please--spirit talks in progress�. �Dan has been in that room for over ten hours now. I image that he�s calling in all the favors from his ancestors in his quest to help me.� Amber placed a hand on her tiny bust, feeling her reduced mass. �If nothing can be done, I guess I�ll really be the shortest FBI agent in history. Amber Two-Inch MacRoy.�
    Nadia gave a careful but supportive tap to Amber�s back. �I believe in Dan�s ability. You�ll be back in form in no time.�
    The tiny woman smiled. �While you�re up, can you get me some water and a bread crumb? I would�ve had a tiny bit of steak for lunch but Smudge ate it.� Amber pointed at the miniature Dachshund, now hiding in a corner, finishing off a steak bone.
    All too glad to help, Nadia went over to the lab�s refrigerator, She broke off a tiny piece of bread and filled a thimble with some tap water. Amber eagerly went into her lunch, and a few minutes later she was patting her full stomach.
    Seeing that Amber had cheered up a bit Nadia got up and went to see what Dr Sung was doing. �What�s up, Doc?�
    Face still buried in work, Sung only mumbled a reply to the effect of �same-old, same-old�.
    Nadia shrugged her shoulders. �Okay, I guess I�ll just snoop around then.�
    Unseen by all the BAT on the table, 36QQ, came back on-line under auxiliary power.
 

6

Albert was checking the other BATS on the control panel when he noticed that 36QQ was on-line. Using the remote video pick-up, Albert saw that the robot was in some sort of laboratory. He called in Big. The tiny crime lord had Albert change the robot�s field of view.
    When the robot�s electronic eye settled on a rather tall and shapely woman Big let go with a wolf-whistle. �Damn! Despite her small chest, she�s built like a brick shithouse (she�s really beautiful)! Albert! Is 36QQ still able to move?�
    �Yes, Sir. The central tank is empty, but otherwise the robot can perform at 62% efficiency.�
    Big was grinning like an idiot. �What a day! First we nab a snooping FBI agent, humbled two more, and to top it off I eliminated a weak link in my organization.� After a few minutes of observing Big spoke again. �36QQ must be in a FBI lab. Too bad none of the secret potion is left in him. I guess I�ll have to settle seeing that mountain of a woman in her drawers. Albert, the remote control.�
    A moment later Albert produced a controller. For all intensive purposes it was a Sony Playstation control pad, but with a twist. This controller was linked into an actual machine, not some image generated by a computer. After a few quick checks 36QQ was off the table. Big was intent on seeing that tall, brown skinned woman with dark red hair naked as a jaybird.

Toby�s head shot up as he heard the BAT move. He closed his laptop and got up. �Guys, we have a problem!�
    Dr Sung spun around. �Holy Hoover!� He exclaimed, reaching for any sort of weapon.
    Despite being damaged, 36QQ lunged at Nadia, ripping off the front of her blouse. Yelping in surprise, Nadia replied in reflex with a swift kick to the robot�s groin. It didn�t work and Nadia�s foot smarted in pain.
    On the other end of the link Big was disappointed when he saw the little bra that Nadia had on. He resolved to fix that shortcoming. He worked the controls, making 36QQ go for Nadia�s skirt. In a snap that piece of clothing was gone, showing Nadia�s lacy-white undies.
    �Great, a robot pervert!� Nadia yelled. She sent a kick against 36QQ�s left knee. The robot was slowed but didn�t stop its quest to strip the female agent.
    During all this Toby did the obligatory �hit-the-robot-with-the-chair-bit�. Of course, 36QQ was unaffected. Toby got an arm in the face for his efforts. He landed against the wall, unconscious.
    Nadia lost the rest of her blouse and her bra. She didn�t let that stop her. Another swift kick to 36QQ�s left knee had rendered that joint frozen. In reflexes born from playing video games, Big�s robot proxy grabbed Nadia and threw her onto one of the work benches. A beaker broke, its contents splashing on Nadia�s front. A warm, tingling sensation coursed throughout her body. �Oh, Dammit!� She exclaimed, watching her A-cup front expand, growing out and round. It was then she felt pleasure as she touched her growing mass, her front as warm as toast. The pleasurable warm feeling stopped when Nadia�s new breasts stopped at basketball size. Unable to help herself, Nadia placed her hands over her nipples, enjoying the rushes of joy she was experiencing.
   �Hot Damn! That�s what the girl needed!� Big loved Nadia�s new front. But, being transfixed on the exotic officer, Big failed to see Dr Sung approaching. Using a hand-held torch, Sung tried to blind the robot�s eyes. In return Sung was thrown across the room, landing on the table that Amber was on.
    That broke Nadia out of her pleasure trance. �You Bastard!� Nadia screamed, getting off the bench and sending another powerful kick at 36QQ, this time to the robot�s chest. It fell down hard. While the mechanical man tried to get up Nadia frantically tried to find something that will finish him off. Grabbing what she hoped was a beaker of acid from Sung�s table, Nadia threw her impromptu bomb at the robot. The clear liquid caused the robot to short-out spectacularly. In a moment the visible lights went out. After jumping up and down several times on the robot Nadia went to see if Amber was okay.
    Sung was on the floor now, nursing a bump on his head. After checking the table Nadia got on all fours and scoured the floor. All she had on now was a panty, pantyhose, and low-heel shoes. She saw Smudge hiding in a corner. Nadia went to him. �Hey, Smudge. Seen Amber anywhere?�
    From underneath Smudge a tiny, muffled voice was heard. �Would you please get this dog off me? I can hardly breathe!�
    Flushed with relief, Nadia lifted the little dog off of Amber. Apart from her torn gown the tiny woman was intact. �Boy, that Smudge did save your bacon! How did he do that?� Nadia gently lifted up Amber in the palm of her hand.
    Amber brushed herself off. �Sung�s landing caused my laptop to move to the edge of the table. I lost my balance and fell off. Smudge jumped up and carefully caught me in his jaws. Except for the gown I don�t have a mark on me.� Amber turned to her faithful protector. �That little guy deserves a medal.� Then Amber saw Nadia�s new bust. �Hey, don�t tell me some of that boob juice got you too?�
    Nadia couldn�t help but to let a few tears go down her face. �Unfortunately, some did. I bet I can wear June�s bras now.� Nadia stood up. �The robot�s wrecked, and it will cause no more grief. That beaker of acid did the trick.� Overcome with emotion, Nadia brought Amber up to face level. �I�m so glad you�re alive.� With that Amber was pressed into Nadia's left breast.
    It was an erotic experience for both of them. Again, Nadia loved the sensations of her new flesh, and Amber enjoyed the wall of flesh in front of her, but not to last. There was the small matter of breathing, for example. �Let go, will you! You�re crushing the wind outta me!� Nadia obeyed instantly, pulling Amber away from the breast.
    After getting in a few good breaths, Amber spoke. �Did you throw a blue beaker at the BAT?�
    Nadia nodded yes. Amber let a goofy grin come on her face. �Well, the truth be known, that robot was felled by Crystal Pepsi that Sung was drinking earlier, not acid,� the tiny woman said.
    Getting up slowly, and carefully sheltering Amber, Nadia walked over to the robot and dabbed a finger on some of that liquid. It was indeed Crystal Pepsi. Shaking her head Nadia spoke. �I always knew that stuff would prove its worth.� While Toby slowly became conscious, Nadia made an observation. �Wonderful. Mr Big has a boob-enlarging potion, a hoard of killer boiler robots, a tiny, busty agent, and me with basketball boobs. What we need now are agents Scully and Mulder to round out the cast.�

Big was disappointed that 36QQ was destroyed. He so wanted to see that tall woman�s bare behind. Her breasts, though, more than made up for that denied view of the woman�s backside.
    Big decided to check on Larry and see how his �interrogation� was going. The four women were pleasuring him to no end, but the FBI guy must have the endurance of a football team! He showed no signs of breaking up, and even his Jack Lord hair was intact.
    Big knew that every man had their breaking point. This Larry Lacher will have to fold sometime. Big had never known a man who had the stamina that Larry was displaying. Had he not been an FBI agent, Big would�ve made Larry a partner in crime. It looked like he�ll have to be eliminated like all the other fools who tried to stop Big.
 

7

It was 10:30 p.m. and Lynnae felt frustrated. Big knew that the FBI was on his trail and it didn�t concern him in the least. Amber, Nadia, Toby, and Sung narrowly avoided being killed by the BAT in the lab. Nadia had been splashed with Big�s boob juice, and now was as massive as June. Fortunately, Nadia could wear June�s bras, and was wearing one now. Thanks to Smudge devotion, Amber was saved from certain death from her fall from the table.
    Lynnae was all the more grateful that Amber lived. Had Amber died Lynnae would�ve made it her life�s mission to kill Big; kill him the most painful way possible. Lynnae spent twenty minutes in the shower, washing away the hate and frustration that resided in her. After drying off and putting on a nightshirt, she promptly flopped down on her hotel bed. June, lounging in the second bed, had to say something.
    �Well, it looks like Mr Big got the best of you today, that bastard. He�s gonna find out that Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.�
    Lynnae turned. �Oh, now you�re a Shakespeare expert? Mr Big will only let a woman hit him if he finds it funny. Mark my words. Tomorrow will be his last day of freedom.�
    �And you call me the fountain of melodrama, Ms Overacting. What about you and Paul? I�ve seen enough bedroom eyes in my life to know that Paul has the hots for you.�
    �Does not!� Lynnae clutched a pillow, half-expected what was going to happen next.
    �Does to!� June launched a pillow at Lynnae, starting pillow fight that lasted until both agents went to sleep exhausted.

At 11:30 Big was ready to make his announcement. He assembled six of the seven men he picked to join his wicked caper. The seventh, Kelly Fremantle, was dead, a fact not lost on the remaining six men. After gaining their attention Big spoke. �Gentlemen, I have an announcement to make. For the past three months I have provided your establishments with women. Women with busts much larger than the average nude-club performer. That was all due to a secret, ancient potion that I obtained on my last trip to a Nepalese monastery. The prime ingredient of that potion comes from a flower so rare that it blooms only once every 50 years.�
    After getting his breath Big forged on. �It is within my power to continue to provide you women enhanced by this potion. However, I have a much more profitable venture. Throughout this city there are vials of my potion connected into the sprinkler systems of every private girls and coed school. Upon my command those sprinklers will turn on, drenching all the girls. In mere moments their busts will be as large as watermelons. Gentlemen, I am talking about at least 2,000 shapely, succulent, innocent young women who will be available for your clubs! In a scant 32 hours this vision will be realized in flesh!�
    The six men allowed their brains to be filled with visions. Visions of having dozens of new girls on their stages. Girls whose �talents� would last a good 20, 30, or even 40 years! Big sensed their avarice and played on it.
    �Yes! 32 hours from now those girls will recite the Pledge of Allegiance. The sprinklers will go on, and by the time the Pledge is finished those girls busts will extend beyond their fingertips! Imagine: entire chorus lines of bouncing boobies! Big-Boobed Football! Even string-bikini volleyball teams! For only a measly 30% of your take I can give you this El Dorado! Well, what do you say?
    �This isn�t going to be another fiasco like North Dakota in �73?� One man asked.
    Big shook his head. �No way, Andy! I got the angles covered. You�ll be rich, and the world will want to see your busty beauties dance.�
    The men were practically drooling over the though; they only nodded their consent. Happy, Big whistled in 12 women, all dressed in Playboy bunny suits that were quite tight. Each man had two of those women behind them. The women turned the chairs around, having the men face them.
    �I�m glad all of you agreed. You won�t be disappointed. To show my appreciation you�ll have the pleasure of spending the rest of the night with these women. And you�ll see how fast the potion works. Girls... �
    On que, all 12 bunny women took a sip from a tiny vile they had hidden in their hands. The potion worked instantly. In seconds the relatively small-chested women now sported breasts that cleared their fronts by 20 inches. Their new boobs went from the collarbone all the way to the navel. The now-massive women pulled up their charges and lead them to the bedrooms. Big had one last thing to say.
    �Remember, gentlemen. That�s the small size you�re seeing. The schoolgirls will have even larger breasts.� Big ended his observation with a laugh.

It was 5 a.m. Dan finally left his spirit-meditation room. In his hand was a tiny bowl. He turned on a light over the examination table that Smudge and Amber were on. Carefully nudging Amber awake, he waited while she removed the sleep from her eyes.
    �Good news, Amber. I have the potion to restore you to normal. You have my word and my ancestor�s souls that you won�t shrink more or turn into a giant.�
    Amber peered into the tiny bowl, which was the size of a serving tray to her. �Well, I really have nothing to lose now, do I?� With that Amber took a long sip from the bowl. She felt warm all over and her hands and feet tingled. In a moment she was growing. She exploded out of her tiny gown as inch after inch was added to her frame. In seconds it stopped. Dan gracefully gave a towel to Amber, who then rapped it around herself. Beaming with joy, she jumped onto a combination height/weight scale. Dan read off the measurements.
    �You�re 4'9" and 90 pounds. Looks like I was a little off. I could refine the potion if you...�
    Amber stopped Dan with a raised hand. �No, Dan. That�s okay. I don�t want to push my luck. One extra inch and five more pounds aren�t going to kill me. And that potion didn�t reduce my bust all that much either.� She turned, letting Dan take a good look at her front. Had her breast remain relative to her new size they would�ve been the size of basketballs. Instead, the new boobs were the size of cantaloupes and looked quite firm and proud. �I think I�m going to like my new size after all. Do be a dear and fetch my clothes. You can get a new shirt when the shops open. As for a bra...,� Amber let her eye land on a desk drawer, �I�m sure that Dr Sung won�t mind if I borrow his for a few days.�
    Dan looked perplexed. �How did you know that Dr Sung was queer? I only found out when I surprized him a few weeks ago.�
    Amber made a devilish grin. �Last night, when he thought I was asleep, he tried on his bra. Of course it didn�t fit him, but it did have a nice color and lace. Don�t worry, I�ll keep his little secret.� With that Amber kissed Dan on the cheek. The big man only blushed and went to fetch Amber�s clothes.

It was 7 a.m. and Big got up. Putting on his robe he decided to check if Larry was still on this earth. He wasn�t surprized to find the FBI agent still alive. The four women tasked to break him have instead been broken by him. Blossom, one of the �interrogators�, weakly got off the FBI man and approached Big.
    �Big, this man is insatiable! He won�t talk; he just lies there and takes everything we dish out! But me and the girls aren�t through yet. Please, let him live for another day.�
    Big raised an eyebrow. �Live for another night of pleasure, eh? Well, you four girls deserve it. After riding all of you like wild horses this Larry guy would be a vacation in comparison.�
    Blossom shoved Big�s head into her cleavage, disappearing for a moment between her mountains of flesh. �Thanks, Big. Christmas has arrived early this year.� With that she went to take a shower, with Big in tow. She needed his help in cleaning a certain part of her anatomy she could no longer see directly: her feet.
 

8

It was 9 a.m. at the lab. The whole of Blue Team was assembled and quite happy to see Amber back, being an inch taller, a few pounds heavier, and having a chest for her troubles. In return for yesterday, Amber gave a crushing hug to Nadia, surprising the taller agent with her strength. Of course everyone else got their hugs and pats in turn.
    �Now we got that out of the way we can go over what we gathered on Big. Toby?� Lynnae let her electronics whiz take the floor. He explained that the robot was started remotely and was able to nail the radio frequency used. With the good grace of Amber�s computer skills Toby felt confident that he could plant a virus in the BATs that will shut them down for good.
    �It all depends if we can shut all of them down at once. Otherwise Big will see us turning his BATs off one-by-one and start the rest.� Toby looked around to measure the impact of his words. No one wanted to see even one girl blown up like a balloon by Big�s perverted plan. �I gather Big�s radio transmitter has to be really powerful for the BATs to pick up the signal. It all remains on where Big is at.�
    Deep in thought, the team pondered where the tiny crime lord could be holed up. June received a flash of inspiration. �Lynnae, it�s been proven that Big takes delight in hiding in plain sight. Now, think like Big for a moment, even though it�ll be disgusting. Where in this city is he hiding? Wall Street? The Statue of Liberty (perish the thought!)? Central Park?�
    Lynnae snapped her fingers. �Of course! Yesterday he bragged over the phone that he�ll create an �empire of breasts�. Empire, as in the Empire State Building!� She whacked her forehead with an open palm. �That stinking rat! Give him a biscuit. Hell, for all we know, he could�ve had a secret level built into that thing when it was constructed! Amber,� Lynnae said, walking over to her newly-restored friend, �get your fingers ready. Go on the Net and draw up the building plans for the Empire State Building. Official and unofficial.�
    �Right with you, boss.� Flexing her fingers, Amber went over to Betty (her laptop) and plugged into the lab�s ISDN line. In a matter of minutes Amber brought up both sets of plans of that historic building on her screen. �Yes! There�s a discrepancy covering the last eight floors. The Underground Builders Union shows a secret elevator that only stops on those eight floors, along with an exit into the underground and main lobby.�
    �Good job, Amber. Now that�s out of the way I propose we infiltrate that building.� Lynnae and her team hammered out their plan for the next three hours. By noon they were ready. Big was going to get a surprise come nightfall.

9

Toby, Amber, and Smudge (who was sleeping in Toby�s equipment bag) were still in the Empire�s basement. Thanks to their penetration of Big�s computer system they were able to listen to that little bombast�s boasting.
    �There�s got to be something we can do, Toby. They need our help.� Amber was ringing her hands in frustration.
    Toby looked at Amber. She was wearing a jumpsuit that accentuated her curves nicely, and her new bust really made itself known through the fabric. Toby was so wrapped up in machines and gadgets that he only saw a friend that wanted to help. He made up his mind. �Go up there, then. I can handle the virus upload from here all by myself.�
    Amber was practically beaming in delight. She got Smudge out of Toby�s bag and sprinted for the secret elevator. The underground entry didn�t require a key to use and Amber knew it will be a fast trip up.

The four agents were in a circle now, back-to-back. All of them were down to their underwear, and the women agents lost their bras. They also had a fair share of bleeding scratch marks and bruises. Big�s four women were also showing signs of wear. Their battle leotards were in tatters, and everything above the waist was exposed.
    June wiped her mouth, her hand smeared in blood. �Hell, why is it every time we fight hand-to-hand we end up naked? Is it some perverted cosmic karma thing?�
    Had the situation been different Paul would�ve found the situation erotic. But seeing himself and his three friends in a certain-death situation dampened any arousal he felt. Perversely, his mind did note the styles of panties his friends had on. Lynnae sported a pink-colored panty with Bugs Bunny images on it. June, true to rumor, had on a really abbreviated panty; it basically covered the front and left the backside all to its lonesome. Nadia had an in-betweener. A good portion of her shapely behind was uncovered, making the panty look more like a bikini bottom. Paul wondered what his friends made of his stereotypical purple polka-dotted boxers.
    Big was enjoying the fight. Seeing so many bouncing boobs at once made his heart beat fast. But he was also growing equally tired by the FBI agents� resiliency. He picked up his gold-plated microphone. �Girls, I tire of this. Kill them now or you�ll get no ice cream!�
    The four bruisers were ready to launch their last attack when a high-pitched war-cry startled them. Amber was at the door, her heaving chest making the jumpsuit rip in several spots. She barely let Smudge down when she threw herself at Big�s women. They might as well had no training at all. With her friends help, along with Smudge, Amber had the four bruisers knocked out.
    Turning in triumph, Lynnae faced Big in his control booth, not caring that he was seeing her practically naked. �Okay, Big. You had your chance. Count on a charge of aggravated assault to be added to your list of crimes, along with exposing several federal agents in the process of performing their duty!�
    Big giggled. �Boy I say so! You four girls were performing quite nicely! If only your boobies were bigger! It�s a shame all of you will still die, but not before watching me celebrate the successful completion of my plan. Right now four of the targeted schools are holding dances. With one press of a switch the BATs in those schools will release the potion into the sprinkler systems. I estimate at least 300 girls will be affected. Girls who either have the choice of breast reduction or pursing a career that will make the most of their newfound ampleness.� Big grinned wide while Lynnae and her friends scowled in frustration. �I expect all those girls will keep their new boobs. Albert, the switch.�
    June swore softly as Albert handed a small box with a bright-red rocker switch to Big. With a look of a child opening gifts Big pressed the switch. Ten seconds later Albert spoke hurriedly. �Master, the four BATs are not functioning. They�re not releasing the potion.�
    �Show me!� Big snarled. Albert activated the remote cameras. On the multitude of screens Big saw the four BATs spark madly. He also saw the potion oozing out of the boiler androids. The potion was only potent for a few minutes when exposed to air. In a matter of minutes the affected BATs and their potions were rendered useless.
    �More bad news, boss. All the other BATs are self-destructing. I can�t stop it!� Albert was on the verge of tears, the first time in his many years of service for Mr Big.
    Big pulled on his hair. �NO! My plan! My beautiful plan! This sucks eggs! I won�t be denied!� On his screens BAT after BAT was blowing up. 72FF and 80HHH, veterans of The Sands caper back in �65, were gone. Big wanted satisfaction, anything, to salve his loss.
    �That�s the last time I�ll let Gates construct software code for me! Okay, you wiseacres!� Big snarled. The five agents were making their way to the door, but Big cut off all avenues of retreat. He sent in his last two BATs, 55GG and 39EE, to herd them and the dog to a particular spot on the floor. No Crystal Pepsi was left to stop those walking boilers now. �Let�s see if you guys have enough strength to fight CHUDs!� Big pressed a button, and a section of floor opened up, swallowing the FBI crew. It was a chute that emptied into the sewer system... and right into a nest of CHUDs.
 

10

Big still had a card up his sleeve. �Albert, if we can�t make New York the boob capital of the world then we�ll destroy it! Tokyo will become the center for world finance!� Big got up, arms akimbo. �Contingency Plan Zeta! Bring all the power circuits to full! Deploy the speaker system and turn on the giant hi-fi. Deploy the sonic cannon. Load the Kenny G music for starters. We�ll make the Big Apple turn over!� Realizing that he made a funny, Big laughed hard. And, as usual, it ended in a laughing and coughing fit.

Panels on top of the Empire State Building moved back, revealing huge speakers. At his command, Big had powerful music blasting at the Big Apple. Nearby buildings were shaking and had their windows broken. A venerable shower of glass was raining down on the streets. People fled in terror, causing many accidents. Big had Albert increase the power of the amplifiers and prepped the sonic cannon. Soon Broadway and Wall Street were affected, the street lights burst and sparked. Even the roads began to buckle under the unrelenting sound of Kenny G music. Something had to be done.
    The Mayor got on the Emergency Broadcast System. �This is Mayor Rudolph Giuliani. We�re under attack by powerful Kenny G music coming from the Empire State Building. All citizens are requested to flee mindlessly. Police and Firemen Union representatives are asked to come to City Hall for contract negotiations. That�s all, folks. Good Luck!� Being New York the citizens didn�t expect their mayor to say anything else.

Big was all smiles. He had Albert use the sonic cannon to destroy a particular corner shop in Broadway. Back in �25 the shopowner short-changed Big a penny, and now the crime lord was exacting his revenge (talk about being petty!). �Listen to the power of that amp! I built it from a Radio Shack kit. Go full bore! Play the Barry Manalow Collectors Set!�
    �Sir, if I do that we�ll blow our arses to Mars!�
    Big turned on his assistant. �You don�t know good music when you hear it!� Big would�ve said more but equipment in the booth started to explode. The controls to the sonic cannon were fried, making the weapon fall silent. Seeing his apartment was about to go up in a blaze of glory, Big made a run for the elevator. �Albert, get the girls! I�ll meet you in the basement!� It was too late. Big�s apartment level exploded in a spectacular fashion.

The five agents managed to escape the sewer. They indeed landed in a nest of CHUDs, but the sewer monsters were all scared away by Smudge�s growling and barking. Toby caught up with his teammates and now all six agents were helping the NYPD in finding any survivors from Big�s apartment.
    Lynnae, wrapped in a thick police blanket, was the first to see Larry being brought outside. She knew what had to be done. She whispered into the ear of the police officer in charge. The officer�s face lit up in approval and he walked over to Larry.
    Larry was freezing in the cold November night. He had on only a pair of leather underwear, provided by Big�s girls. The girls themselves were brought down earlier and were whisked away amid a shower of wolf whistles. Seeing what looked like the officer in charge approaching, Larry stood up straight. Before he could speak the cop piled into him.
    �Sylvester Drake, aka Mr Big, you�re under arrest for more crimes than I can shake a stick at. Specifically, you�re being charged with aggravated assault, possession of unlicenced sound equipment, using un-unionized labor for your boiler installations and for stealing Jack Lord�s hair.�
    Larry was dumbstruck. �Officer, that�s a lie! Mr Big is a midget! Look at me; do I look like Billy Barty with delusions of Godhood?�
    The cop rubbed his bald head. �Well, Mr Big is known for being a master of disguise, and as a sexual monster.� The cop pointed to Larry�s leather knickers. �Those undies tell me that I have the right man in front of me. Gomez,� the cop said to his partner, �book him and take his butt back to the tank. I�m sure those tank guys would love to see this.�
    Gomez gladly slapped the cuffs on Larry and dragged him to an awaiting cruiser, reading his Miranda rights along the way. Larry had one more thing to say. �Alright, officer... whoever you are. Your career is over! Hear me? Over!� The cruiser�s door was slammed shut in his face.
    The commanding officer walked over to the window, his words still audible through the glass. �Who loves you, baby?�
    Larry sneered as the officer made a pouting kiss beyond the window. Larry was still sneering as the police cruiser drove away into the night.
 

11

Once again Blue Team was assembled in Chief Talbert�s office. The Chief was going over some papers. Finished, he got up and addressed his people. �That�s a damn fine piece of work, team. Mr Big and his twisted plans were thwarted, saving thousands of girls from a life of exploitation. And the New York studios of CBS and Comedy Central have been wiped off the face of the Earth. A double victory!�
    Confused, Toby spoke. �Sir, I don�t see how the destruction of two television studios can be construed as a victory.�
    Talbert eyed the lanky electronics genius. �Son, I have my reasons. I�m also glad to say that no one died as a result of Big�s sonic attack. Sure, there were thousands of injuries and two billion dollars worth of property damage was inflicted. But, hey, this is New York we�re talking about. By this time next week it�ll be forgotten.�
    �Speaking of forgotten, Chief, what about Big and Albert? And the women they enlarged.� June said, speaking for the entire group.
    �Glad you asked, Miss Parlor. It seems that those two were thrown clear by the explosion and crashed into the NBC studios. Conan O�Brian was taping an episode of Late Night at the time. He decided to use Big in an impromptu midget-throwing contest. After being thrown several times Big was rescued by Albert. So far we haven�t been able to track them down. If anything, Big is back in hiding, probably at some isolated tropical isle filled with naked women. As for the 30-odd women who had their busts enlarged, they were given two choices. Either being charged for accepting an unlicenced drug, or having their busts reduced to a more �presentable� size. All 30 women decided to go with the latter. Dan has destroyed all remaining samples of the breast potion. We certainly don�t want that stuff getting loose.�
    �That I can believe, Sir,� Lynnae said, �and what�s the fate of one Larry Lecher?�
    �For once I agree with you, Miss Wilcox,� Talbert devilishly added. �The Director has made it his mission to give Larry every shit job coming down the pike. If Larry has any sense at all, he�ll resign. Thanks to Washington�s fixation on sex scandals even Larry�s senator daddy doesn�t want to help him out.� Seeing the wolf smiles on his agents' faces made Talbert a little nervous. Larry deserved what he got, and Talbert resolved never to get on Blue Team�s shit list. �The Director himself will see all of you tomorrow. Of course, you�ll present the �official� report. I�ll keep the other report stored up here.� Talbert tapped his head. �Smudge will, of course, get a commendation. A commendation for performing above and beyond the call of duty, protecting an �unconscious� Amber during that BAT attack in the lab. Nadia�s new bust will be attributed as a peculiar and unreproducible side-effect of Big�s drug.�
    �I hope that �side-effect� remains unreproducible.� Nadia said, patting the sides of her breasts. �I�ve gotten quite attached to my new bust. I�ll take some getting use to, but I finally have an excuse for that shopping trip to New York City!� Everyone in the room laughed. �I like my new size, and Harold will definitely like them. And Amber, I must say you�re quite a face-turner yourself. You can get any man you want now.�
    Amber blushed. She was grateful that her experience of being a two-inch tall agent will be kept secret. As for her new bust and extra inch of height, it will all be chalked up to Dan Spirit Talker�s cure for the new �narcotic� that Big concocted. �Thanks for the compliment, Nadia, and thank you, Sir. I�m sure the cover story will work out well. This afternoon I�ll try it out on Bert and see how he reacts.�
    �Bert?� Nadia said in a bit of surprise. �Who�s this Bert person? Have you been dating without telling us?�
    Amber turned, grinning from ear-to-ear. �Bert works down in the archives. We�ve been dating for several months. He�s even taller than you, Nadia, and his bod is built like a tank. I assure you, he fell for my feminine charms, intelligence, and spunky personality the instant he met me. He�ll find these new boobs icing on the cake.� Adding emphasis to her point, Amber cupped her cantaloupe-sized knockers and gave them a soft squeeze.
    Lynnae shook her head. �And here I thought that June was the sex maniac.� After that the whole group of agents degenerated into a pack of arguing teenagers. Talbert decided to let them have their fun, and went ahead reading the New York Times.

Lynnae regained consciousness. She was on a hospital bed, surrounded by her friends: June, Paul, Amber, Nadia, Chief Talbert, Toby, Dan, and Dr Sung. She told about the weird dream she had, speaking in an excited voice. The female cops all looked a little bemused when they heard their descriptions. Amber patted her real-life, cantaloupe-sized lungs, wishing she got them by magic instead of that horrible experience many months earlier.
    Lt Larry Harkin (Lynnae wondered why he had a different last name in the dream) wasn�t around. Talbert had put him on a shit assignment, wishing that the dense, lecherous cop would get the point and leave the police force. Lynnae ended her story, feeling a bit tired. Dr Sung asked everyone to leave so that Lynnae could get her rest. Before leaving Nadia opened her travel bag and retrieved Smudge. The tiny dog was eager to lick Lynnae�s face off. Sung made an exception and allowed Lynnae to keep Smudge for a few hours.
    Before leaving, Paul gave a quick kiss to Lyn�s cheek. In response, Lyn reached out and pulled Paul down by his collar, giving him a longer kiss on the lips. June nodded and grinned her approval as she pulled Paul away and playfully pushed him out the door. Now alone, and with the tiny dog between her breasts, Lynnae went to sleep. She hoped this time to have a �normal� dream, preferably a romantic fantasy involving Paul. While she dreamed, a janitor went by the room, cleaning the floor. He raised his head for the audience to see. It was Mr Big, and he had a devilish twinkle in his eye.

[End Credits. Still shots from the episode are shown. The actors are shown posing in front of many famous New York landmarks, even though they were computer-generated images in some television studio. Wakacha-wakacha-wakacha plays. Credits end with the duo in an action pose. Fade to black...]

[After the credits a commercial aired. �Tomorrow, June 2, the long-awaited Police Bluemovie will open in theaters across Outback. Get your tickets now, before they�re gone.� The Police Bluecast appears, speaking in unison. �BE there, or BE prepared!� Police Blue: The Movie. This film has been rated M18.]
 

[Epilogue]

The Big Apple episode was a ratings monster. It was played several times on many planetary networks, just like the Police Blue Time Bust episode. And just like that animated episode, The Big Apple was released four months later on video cube.
 

END

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