Ratings Advisory: The Earth Media Content Group has determined that this story can only be read by people above the age of 18. It contains subjects and situations that are suitable only for mature audiences. Parents with underaged children will need to activate their content-advisory programs now.

[Prologue]

Police Blue stayed, for the most part, a T14 show. In its history there were only three episodes that earned an M18 rating, and this was one of them. Basically, it comes down to exposed flesh, primarily female. In a T14 show a female can have her backside exposed, but the crotch and the front of the breasts must be covered. In an M18 episode the breasts are fully exposed ;-). This particular Police Blue episode, Beach Blue Bingo, the buxom duo and friends are at the beach. During the course of the episode more than one female becomes topless. You'll have to see the show for yourself to find out who!

[Show introduction: Theme music plays. A fast-paced action sequence of the two main characters, Lynnae and June. Running, jumping, dodging, shooting, and rolling, showing off their physical prowess while their breasts bounce underneath their police shirts. Gawking criminals, mesmerized by these antics, are easily subdued and handcuffed. The duo then stood back-to-back and went into silhouette, showing their ample shapes. Cue in show and episode title.]
 

1

2417, late spring, New Darwin. Assembled in Room 405 at Central Station, New Darwin Police, were the members of Blue Team. The four sergeant-detectives gathered at the conference table, drinking coffee and going over reports. Except Lynnae. She drank from a 20-oz bottle of Jolt. As she often said, she likes her caffeine �straight'.
    Nadia finished off her first cup of Jadestone Java. �It seems we're doing too good of a job. There's hardly any gang activity, save the mob, to draw our attention. And none of the other regulars have so much as shown their noses.� Indeed, not even the Evil Good Humor Men and the Flat Chest Society have made so much as a peep in the last three months.
    �I'd say were due for some rest,� June said, emptying her first cup also. �To tell the truth, I won't mind doing some desk work for the next few days.�
    Lynnae finished her last 6 ounces in a long draw. �No such luck. The people upstairs want us to work, mainly for appearances. I managed to swing us a plum assignment.�
    At the coffee pot Paul poured out his second cup of java. �What is there to do? You didn't convince Talbert to send us after a gang of furniture thieves?�
    �Something much better. Take a gander at file 0451.� Lynnae's three friends used their wetware to access the mentioned file. After a moment they giggled.
    Paul spoke first. �Lyn, Talbert is making us look for a hot-goods merchant? At the beach?�
    June laughed. �Not just any hot-goods. This guy is selling the latest model of stolen plastiskin breasts. We're gonna find and arrest him for selling hot boobs!�
    Nadia nodded. �A perfect working assignment. Now we can take in the rays while looking for this Iggy Kolstien. I'll have the chance to try out that new swimsuit Harold gave me at Christmas.�
    �Too bad we can't use the swimsuits we had on the Albany. Then again, we would've drawn attention to ourselves, and be hounded by drooling earth geeks.� June said despondently.
    Crooning her head, Lyn tried to find the source of a tapping sound. �What is that noise? I've been hearing it for the last ten minutes.�
    Paul and Nadia were looking also. They settled their gaze on June. She smiled like she was hiding something. �June, are you still wearing that fake rock from the Brandies case? You better return it to Storage before they take inventory.�
    June placed her right hand over her left. �It's not that. Take a better look.� In a flare of dramatics, June raised her hands, then removed her right hand. She spread the fingers of her left hand for all to see. There, on her ring finger, was a simple gold band. June was smiling.
    Lyn was smiling too. �June, congratulations! When did Greg propose to you? And how?�
    Feeling a little embarrassed, June rubbed the gold band with her right index finger. �Last night. Greg ordered pizza and made a big production out of it. He carried the box like it was made of crystal and got to one knee before me. He told me to open it and take the first slice. There, in the center of a sausage and mushroom pizza, was the ring box.�
    �A unique way to propose, June.� Nadia giggled. �Given the choice, I would've still accepted Harold's proposal. Mind you, this was when I was undercover on Cloud 9. The ring got loose from his grasp, and we bounced around my room in zero-gravity for a good ten minutes before we got it. But we enjoyed every minute of it.�
    June smiled crookedly. �Who wouldn't? Bouncing around in zero-gee with oversized lungs would make anyone happy.� Everyone laughed for a moment. �Well, to finish the story, after accepting his proposal we had the pizza and did some snuggling in front of the tri-dee. Nothing more.�
    Lynnae looked incredulous. �Hey, what are you trying to imply? You think I assumed you two shared sheets last night? Well, you're right!�
    �Lyn! As I become more of a steady romantic, you're picking up my wild ways. You'll get your man yet!�
    That prompted a series of silly faces and counter gestures. All of which lasted for a good fifteen minutes.
 

2

Murdoch Beach, located thirty kilometers southwest of New Darwin on the Bass Sea, was one of the most popular beaches on the planet. An unusually warm period of weather had taken hold, resulting in a larger-than-average late April crowd to appear.
    Blue Team arrived in their beach gear. Lyn had on a downright practical, and modest, one-piece swimsuit. Its dull purple color made Lyn look less busty, provided that you were a good distance away. Nadia wore her new two-piece. It too could be considered modest, its dayglo lime green really contrasting with her brown skin.
    Lyn expected June to wear a practically nonexistent piece of nothing. Instead, Lyn was happily surprized. To her credit, June did learn that decency did have a place on the beach. She wore a bikini and a quite generous t-shirt that went all the way to her waist. Only her red bikini bottom could be seen. Paul had on a tank-top and baggy shorts. Underneath he did have a pair of swimming trunks. He had every intention to take a swim later in the day.
    Lyn adjusted her sun visor. �Okay, people, listen up. Iggy Kolstien is somewhere on this beach. When you find him, use your �ware and contact the others. We can't use micro-communicators, since Iggy is a walking bug detector. However, I doubt he can detect and jam �ware transmissions.�
    �Will do, boss,� June said, pulling down on her t-shirt. �If Iggy gets any ideas, I'll use some �friendly persuasion'. Don't worry, I'll make sure he stays conscious this time.�
    �Glad to hear that. We certainly don't want our suspects to injury themselves when you flash your chest at them. Now, get walking.�
    �Yes, boss,� the other cops said.

It was 10 a.m. and the morning activities were in full swing. The sunbathers were out, applying suntanning lotion to themselves and stretching out. Bikini tops and straps were undone, allowing for unblemished backsides to get full tans. The food vendors were pushing their wares up and down the beach. Even the stereotypical old men with metal detectors were out in force, looking for treasure.
    One section of beach was dedicated to sand volleyball courts. A game was in progress; only a modest crowd watched as the two teams exchanged volleys. Lyn recognized the teams - one was the White Swimsuit Brigade, the other the Bouncing Betties. As you could guess, these were womens teams, and all had breasts as big as the volleyballs they were using. In addition, the symbols of NB (Nose Bleed) and JF (Jiggle Fest) appeared on the bottoms of the tri-dee projectors of the viewing audience. Gratuitous, slow motion shots of jumping, bouncing, practically naked young women certainly rated those two symbols! These antics didn't force an M18 rating - yet.
    On another section of beach June made for a stage platform. A mime performance was going on, entertaining the handful of people standing there. To June's delighted surprise she saw Greg, sitting indian-style in the sand. �Greg, what are you doing here?�
    �Isn't it obvious? I'm sitting.� Greg said, getting a small kick of sand from June. �Hey, that's not nice, you beach bully!� He stuck out his tongue.
    �How did you know I was here?� June asked.
    �Easy. You were rather noisy this morning. I caught a glimpse of your bikini bottom as you put on your sweats. And since the weather was so nice I figured this would be the place you'll be. That, plus I discreetly followed you.�
    June giggled. �With that line of reasoning you can be a police detective too! Actually, I'm on assignment to nab a hot-goods dealer. You can tag along, but when its arrest time stand back and let me do my work.�
    �June, I'll do just that as long as your hot-goods don't get taken.� Greg laughed, and was rewarded with a kiss to the cheek instead of more sand.
    �You're insufferable. Get up and let's get going.�
 

3

Nadia also prowled the beach, eyeing the various vendors. Feeling a little peckish, she decided to get an early lunch at a hot dog stand. There, to her surprise, was her husband Harold. Smudge, their pet miniature Dachshund, was at his feet.
    �What's all this then?� Nadia said, arms akimbo.
    Harold drank in the sight of his bikini-clad wife. Truly she could've made much more money as a model, but he loved her just the way she was. �To let you know, I'm sick.� Harold made a small, but utterly fake, cough. �This dang weather started up my allergies. The only cure for that is fresh sea air.�
    �If that's the case, why bring Smudge?� Nadia got down to one knee, coaxing Smudge to come to her. Smudge needed little prompting to be picked up by his mistress. The little rat licked Nadia's chin and cheeks, making her giggle.
    "Oh, I can't leave a killer like Smudge unattended. The grass mice would've been wiped out in no time. Besides, he's sick too. Must be the pollen.�
    �Sure. I believe you - not!� Nadia stroked Smudge's coat. �I bet the rat here wants some lunch. How about a hot dog?�
    Harold grinned, then bought a foot long dog and broke it in half. He offered one half to Smudge. �Okay, boy, go ahead and eat. But if you do, then you'll be committing an act of cannibalism.�
    �Harold! That joke is so old that it'll give Mr Big a run for his money.�
    �C'mon, Nad. It's the obligatory weiner dog/hot dog joke. Better I said it than June.�
    �I heard that!� June shouted from some distance away.

Lynnae continued her search. More people were showing up, staking out their piece of sand with towels, beach umbrellas and chairs. Then she noticed someone. From his height and build it could be only one person. Grinning, Lyn made her way to Bert Carson, Amber's fiancé. �Hey, Bert, glad to see you. How are things looking for the wedding?�
    The tall man smiled. �Hectic, as predicted. Our folks are running around like ants, organizing and checking. I decided to take a break with Amber and come here to the beach.�
    �Amber is supposed to be at work today. Let me guess, she's got the 24-hour flu?�
    �An officially-approved 24-hour flu. Talbert gave her the day off. Speaking of which,� Bert said, turning to look at the row of changing tents behind him, �Amber got herself a new suit. It's a wowser.�
    Lynnae giggled. �I'm sure it's tasteful and decent. Well, there she is.� One tent opened, and out stepped Amber, donned in a knee-length beach robe. She held the robe closed with her hands, making her way to her fiancé.
    �It's wonderful, Bert. Thanks!� Amber kissed her love's hand. �Hi, Lyn. I see that you've chosen a one-piece. It complements your �natural charms' quite nicely.�
    �Thank you, Amber. I would like to give out some compliments myself. Take off that robe and let's see that body of yours, Soon-To-Be Mrs Amber Carson.�
    Amber readied her hands. �Okay, Lyn, but what you're about to see should only be viewed by the gods!� In a graceful motion the robe came off and pooled at her feet. Lyn was thunderstruck by what she saw. Amber always exercised, but with Bert's coaching she developed good tone to her muscles. By all means she didn't have a bodybuilder physique, but, at a glance, one could tell she can handle anyone much bigger than herself. Then there was the swimsuit, if it could be called that. Amber's bikini bottom was practically a thong; most of her cute, perky backside was exposed for God and everybody to see. The breasts were only covered in the front with two small white triangles. With her small stature (1.42 meters - that's 4' 8") and cantaloupe breasts Amber would've been arrested for public indecency - had it been 20th century Florida.
    �Lyn, you can stop gawking now.� Amber giggled, which made her breasts jiggle (JF). Next, Amber daintily placed her hands on her breasts. �Of course, my triangles are being held in placed by 12-hour, waterproof body paste. No strings at all! We're gonna make the most of today, because the next two weeks will be nothin' but work.�
    Bert (2.2 meters - 7' 3" - tall) picked up his woman and kissed her. �You said it, honey. The next time we'll be alone will be the honeymoon. Let's go to our spot and apply that suntan lotion. A good thing you can still get a tan through the suit. What little there is of it.�
    For that remark, Bert got a playful slap. �With your big hands you'll be done in two seconds. But with your giant back and my tiny hands it'll take me all afternoon to apply the lotion to you.�
    "But you'll love every second of it, massaging my huge, muscular back.�
    �If I survive the hand cramps.� Amber kissed Bert on the forehead. �Time to go, my little giant.�
    �Quite so, my living doll.� The couple proceeded down the beach, letting Lynnae continue her search for Iggy Kolstien.
 

4

Nadia and Harold worked their way though a beach side bazaar. Smudge wasn't on a leash and was carried by Harold. The tiny dog had to be carried anyway, since his little legs couldn't keep up with his owners' long strides.
    The bazaar had the typical food huts, open-air goods displays, and lively advertisements. One caught Nadia's eye, and she used her �ware to talk to her husband. Honey, I believe we've found it. There, to your right. Harold saw it. A booth ahead of him had a sign across the front that said �Beachwear Accessories'. The young woman manning that booth was definitely wearing a big pair of accessories underneath her t-shirt.
    You're right, Nad. Let's get into character, but remember one thing. This'll be a joint arrest by the New Darwin Police and the Marshall's Office.
    Glory hound! But I get top billing. Nadia's mental laugh was heard by Harold, who laughed inside too. The couple got to the counter. The top-heavy woman behind that counter had a most pleasant voice. �Hello. How may I help you? Looking for swimming trunks? Large beach towels?�
    �A very large t-shirt will do nicely. White, if you have them in that color. Plus, I'm interested in buying some heavy-duty plastiskin breasts.� Harold said in complete sincerity. Like you need plastic boobs, honey. As much as I lust after your earlier size, I really like you the way you are now! Harold �said' over the link to Nadia.
    Flattery will get you everywhere, sweetcheeks. Nadia replied. She would've said more, but a heavyset man came from the back of the booth. It was Iggy Kolstien, every centimeter the dubious businessman. �Did someone say plastiskin breasts? Why, I do have such items in stock and at competitive prices. Who's interested in getting such handy and practical accessories?�
    �That would be little old me,� Nadia said in a honey voice. She placed her hands on the side of her breasts.
    Iggy arched his eyes. �Pardon me for saying so, ma'am, but do you really want plastiskin? You're a fine specimen of the female gender. Why augment your already ample form?�
    Nadia giggled like a girl. �Thank you! That's so sweet! As much as I want larger breasts, they're impractical most of the time. With plastiskin boobs I can adjust my size to fit the occasion. That's the one advantage over nanite augmentation - speed.�
    �So right my dear, so right. I can give you a demonstration right now. Daphne,� Iggy said to his assistant, �demonstrate to these fine folks the workings of your boobies.�
    Daphne stepped back from the counter, enabling Harold and Nadia a better look at her. �I'm wearing the latest generation of plastiskin breasts. They still use compressed air, and can even draw in outside air via microscopic ducts. But these puppies,� Daphne patted the sides of her watermelons, �also use condensed memory plastic technology. Allow me to demonstrate.� With a thought, the breasts deflated, the t-shirt only lightly ruffling from the escaping air. In two minutes the breasts went from watermelon to softball size. �This is the breasts' storage size. Now watch - they get bigger quicker than they shrink.� And indeed they did. In two minutes Daphne's fake front was beachball size, her t-shirt strained to capacity.
    �Neat! How long do the power cells last, and how much to they weigh?� Nadia pretended to be excited, leaning over the counter to better look at Daphne's enormousness.
    �Assuming only two expansions/reductions a day, you can expect these babies to last one month on two b-cell batteries. Each breast weighs 2.5 kilos, including the batteries. For the attachments, variable bioglue is used, and remains viable for two years under normal usage.� Daphne willed her bust to shrink to watermelon proportions. �The interface is controlled by sustained emotions of joy and muscular contractions. To get big, just be very happy, and to shrink just contract your chest muscles. There's even a lock function to keep the breasts a certain size for long periods of time.�
    Still playacting, Nadia held one of Harold's arms. �Honey, I want them. They're just the thing for our special occasions.�
    �Anything for you, Pumpkin.� Harold kissed Nadia on the lips. �You got yourself a sale, Mister. What's the damage?�
    Iggy grinned. �That'll be 450 c-bills, which includes the sales tax. Would you like to have them boxed up, or would the little lady like to wear them now?�
    Nadia practically beamed when she replied. �Now, of course! I have to know if they stretch over my mounds completely.� She patted the tops of her basketball-sized breasts, making both Harold and Iggy a little anxious.
    �Of course. Your satisfaction must be guaranteed. I have a changing room in the back. Here,� Iggy went under the counter and came back up with the merchandise. �The plastic will match your skin color once you put them on. Daphne will help you if you need assistance.�
    �Thanks, but I'll manage on my own.� Nadia was then lead to the back by Daphne. Once alone, the cop used her �ware to interrogate the plastiskin breasts' software and firmware. She was looking for the encoded i.d. markers the breasts carried, markers that could only be removed at the utter destruction of the breasts themselves. In twelve seconds they were found.
    Bingo! Harold, we got'em! I'll call in the others and summon the Beach Patrol. Continue to shmooze with Iggy and find out if he sold any other breasts today.
    Sure thing, my exotic queen. Just be thankful I brought a pair of cuffs with me in my fanny pack. What about you?
    Of course. Remember, I came here expecting to arrest Iggy! You're carrying stuff out of habit!
 

5

Bert and Amber selected a spot of beach to settle down. Their peace didn't last. They heard a gaggle of teenage girls running down the shore. Not unusual by itself, but Bert noticed the girls were running with their arms over the fronts. The girls saw him, not difficult considering how tall he was. The high school gym teacher was surprised to see the girls were from his school. They gathered in front of Bert, catching their breath and doing their best to cover their fronts with their arms.
    �Julie Jankowitz, where's your top? And those of your friends too.� Bert looked a little embarrassed. The girls, like Amber, were involuntarily blown-up by nanite-laced earrings that were planted by Mr Big at their school's homecoming dance. Having seven girls in front of you with cantaloupe breasts and no top can make any man anxious.
    Julie regained her breath. �Mr Carson! I'm glad that we ran into you! We were minding our own business when... a group of fat men... showed up. They stole our tops while we were sunbathing! Our boyfriends tried to get them back, but they were beaten up and... and...�
    �And sat on!� Another girl finished. �Then those guys taunted us with our tops, trying to make us move our arms. When we didn't do that, one guy said �hey, let's make a complete set and take their bottoms too!�
    �Bastards!� Bert said. �Where's the Beach Patrol when you need them?�
    �You said it, Mr. Carson!� Julie and her friends were still tightly covering their mounds. �We were on the way to find them when we saw you. Can you help us?�
    �Can we ever!� It was Amber that spoke. �Honey, I say we make those turkeys return those tops, unless they want knee surgery!�
    Bert grinned down at his future wife. �I hope you brought along your badge in your travel tote. I don't think your body is proof enough that you mean business!�

6

�There they are, Mr Carson.� Julie pointed to a group of men. They were just the way she described them: big, fat, and stupid-looking. Amber looked for herself, and saw that they were members of Civil Disturbance 101, a gang of over-aged delinquents bent on having fun their own way.
    �Bert,� Amber said in all seriousness, �going by those jerks' record it'll be even money they'll put up a fight. Feel up to providing assistance?�
    �Amber, I would've helped even if you didn't ask! C'mon, let's get those bikini tops back.�
    Like she did to Mr Big months before, Amber marched toward the CD-ers like a crusading knight. The middle-aged hooligans wolf whistled at the site of Amber's scarely-covered body. The leader, who could've been a mid-level manager in his day job, whistled the loudest, silencing his men. �Well, well, well. Boys, looks like another for the collection. But I see no strings. Who wants to rip off those little white triangles?�
    A particularly thin CD-er waved his arms wildly. �Me boss! I've been aching to touch some boobies all day!� He started to walk over when Amber reached around to her fanny pouch and pulled out her badge. She displayed it like one would with a cross to a vampire. That made the man stop, and the other CD-ers oohing in fake fear.
    �I'm Amber MacRoy of the New Darwin Police! As of now all of you are under arrest for theft of personal property and disorderly conduct! Be nice or there will be trouble!�
    The leader guffawed. �No way in the world that you can be a copper, doll. You're just a kid playacting. Hank, relieve Barbie of her top.�
    Amber heard that command, but her mind fixated on the word �doll'. No one, save Bert, can say that word to Amber and expect to have functioning kidneys afterwards. In a quick move she secured her badge in her fanny pouch and entered a fighting stance. Hank laughed and made his first and last attempt to get his hands on the little woman's top. Amber's left foot connected with Hank's chin, sending him to slumber land. His body hit the sand in a soft thud.
    �What are you, doll? Did ya step outta of an episode of Nude Attack Woman? Boys,� the leader announced, �get her bottom too!�
    The CD-ers made a bum rush. Improbably, but due to anime physics quite allowable, Amber jumped up high, and came back down on a CD-er's head. That unfortunate was pushed down into the sand so far that only his head was left above ground. �Nude Attack Woman, eh? Get ready for Gratuitousness!� She kicked high, nailing another man squarely in the chest. �Gratuitous crotch shot!� Amber yelled as the tri-dee viewers were treated to a close-up of Amber's waist, thighs, and thankfully covered crotch. A CD-er bowled over as Amber's fists found the man's kidneys. She kicked backwards, nailing another man in the forehead. �Cute bottom shot!� the little cop announced as she turned on one foot and kicked a man in the breadbasket. Her cute, perky bottom was shown from three angles. �Jiggle Fest!� She said next, butting chests with a heavy CD-er. He was knocked down, unconscious but in a happy daze, the viewers getting to see Amber's bouncing bazooms.
    The CD-ers finally rushed her in a wave, dog-piling atop her body. Bert got into the fray and literally tossed bodies of his woman, each CD-er first rendered unconscious by what was considered a �love-tap' by Bert. Amber got up and made a quick survey. Only the leader was left standing. Instead of getting away, he just stood gawking at Amber as she breathed air into her starving lungs. �What are you staring at?! Take this!� Amber launched herself and extended a leg. The man was quite unaware of what was about to hit him, for he still looked like a stunned penguin. And he fell like a stunned penguin. Amber landed in a crouch and stood up proud.
    �Honey, are you planning to become the next Nude Attack Woman?� Bert bashfully pointed to his woman's front.
    Gazing down, Amber found that her two triangles were gone, fully exposing her cantaloupe breasts. �Eek! How did they come off?� She covered her front with her arms.
    Some distance away, a CD-er that was thrown by Bert got up, and to his amusement found that he held Amber's white bikini triangles. He ran away as fast as he could.
    �Hey, you! Get back here!� Amber raised her arms in protest, but quickly covered herself again. A crowd was forming at the scene, and Amber and the girls were feeling embarrassed by their lack of bikini tops. Bert corrected that, taking the t-shirts off the stunned CD-ers and giving them to the girls. Amber got the CD Leader's t-shirt. It was a huge tent on her tiny frame, going down to her knees. It was found that the CD-ers had the bikini tops stored in their trunks. The girls, understandably, didn't want them back because of that. The girls' boyfriends were then checked out to see if they were okay. Amber walked over to her man.
    �Thank you, my little giant.� Amber had Bert get to one knee, kissing him on the lips. The crowd clapped its approval. Bert lifted his love in his arms and gave her a reply kiss. That was the way the Beach Patrol found them three minutes later.
 

7

Meanwhile, the Beach Patrol and four regular policemen arrived at Iggy's booth, cataloging and packing his wares. It was determined that only two other customers bought the hot plastiskin breasts. The two buyers, both flat-fronted women, had mentioned to Iggy in passing that they were going to participate in a wet t-shirt competition at 1 p.m. That was only 10 minutes away.
    Harold, Nadia, Paul, June, Greg, and Lynnae found the stage, but no sign of the girls. The cops milled about in the gathering crowd, using their �ware to ferret out the owners of the fake breasts. �Too bad I can't participate in the contest,� June lamented, ��cause only you have the right to see me in a wet tee from now on.�
    �I don't mind if you participate one last time. You can always donate the money to charity, or use it to cover our future wedding expenses.� Greg offered, maneuvering his arm around June's waist.
    �If it's fine with Lyn, I'll do it. But you better prepare to stop any man who tries to �impose' himself on me!� June giggled and kissed Greg on the cheek. Hey, Lynnae. Why not put me on stage? I bet those girls will show up at the last minute anyway. I can make their boobs blow up a little to distinguish them from the others. June said via her �ware.
    Fine by me, June. Just don't overdo it. The Beach Patrol is busy enough picking up those CD-ers without you instigating a riot. Lyn mentally stuck out her tongue. June could only giggle back in reply. Next, June undid her bikini top. She allowed her top to fall to the ground and handed it to Greg. She raised her arms, giving the viewing audience the pleasure of seeing the bottoms of her natural wonders. Quickly she got on stage, her breasts bouncing nicely from her running.
    The stage rapidly filled with contestants, and the crowd was hooting and calling out encouragement. June tugged down on her shirt, making her breasts stand out better. When she was sure that the contest was about to begin, June sent a command from her �ware. If any of the plastiskin boobs were there, then they'll  expand to a noticeable size.
    The MC of the contest got on the microphone. �Hello, Folks! It's a wonderful day to be out here, isn't it?� The crowd yelled. �I said, isn't it a wonderful day?� The MC said again, and the crowd replied even louder. �Good! This is gonna be the first Wet Tee contest of the season! First, let's have our lovely ladies strut their stuff before we use the water hose!� And the crowd went wild, yeah.
    Lyn and the others were watching too, gauging the breast size of the contestants. In forty seconds they found the two women. They were nervously touching their fake breasts, most likely in an attempt to find the lock button. They were touching in the right places, but their bazooms kept growing.
    The MC noticed the two women also. �Say, girls, save your touching until after you're wet!� The crowd laughed, but the women were not amused. The breasts were now the size of beachballs, the t-shirts finally beginning to rip open.
    �That's not right,� Nadia said. �They're not supposed to get any bigger than that.� The crowd looked on in perverse curiosity as the plastiskin continued its relentless expansion. The other contestants moved away, giving the fake lungs lots of leeway. The two women tried to get the breasts off, but they remained firmly attached to their owner's fronts. After two minutes of growth the breasts stopped at half-again bean bag size. The breasts weren't heavy, just bulky. The breasts were practically touching the stage floor, the women now visibly embarrassed.
    June, Lyn said, I told you only a little bit. We didn't need to embarrass them. They thought they bought legitimate merchandise.
    Lyn, I did so, but they must've done it themselves. Honest! June raised her hands in puzzlement. The MC was about to speak when the PA system erupted in a storm of static. A man's voice came over the system, a most familiar voice at that.
    �Hello, beach lovers! Its Outback's favorite mad bomber - the Postmaster General!�
    The cops gritted their teeth. �What the bloody hell has Postie come up with this time?� Nadia said in a whisper to Harold.
    "I betcha you wanna know why I've taken over this PA system. Simple. I wanted to inform you where I've planted my latest and greatest explosive wonders!� Postie giggled, a most disturbing sound heard by everyone listening. �Those two women on stage are the proud bearers of explosive plastiskin breasts! Not only can they explode, but implanted in the plastic are 3mm rifle darts. Thousands of them! I'll blow up those boobies by remote control unless my demands are met! Wanna hear them?�
    The crowd hissed and booed. The two women were terrified. All they wanted were plastiskin breasts they could occasionally wear to spice up a romantic dinner or to fill out a tiny bikini. Two men, obviously the womens' boyfriends, made their way to the stage. They wanted to be with their women in their time of need.
    Postie cleared his throat. �Okay, folks, here's my list. One - I want penguins nailed to every lamp post in New Darwin! Two - The New Darwin Devils must change their name to the Jackalopes. Third - All the women on the beach must remove their tops! Only one of these demands must be met. You have 15 minutes to comply, otherwise the beach will be blanketed in dead bodies. And don't even try to remove those boobs, because they're literally �booby trapped'.� Postie knew he made a bad joke, and his laughter filled the air.
    The crowd started to back away, but Postie spoke again. �Hey, don't leave! Wanna see a demonstration?� A trash can near the stage blew up, ejecting its refuse into the air. The poor women screamed. �Now stay put! You now have 14 minutes to comply.�
    �Bastard!� Lyn hissed. �Nadia, Harold - control this crowd. Get them to calm down.�
    �Will do, Lyn.� Nadia said.
    June, you stay on stage and attend to those women. Keep them calm and relaxed. Also contact the Beach Patrol and identify us. See if you can call up the local bomb squad. Lynnae said over her �ware.
    Roger, June replied, getting to the women. The enormous fake breasts were now on the stage floor, their explosive contents canceling out their comical size.
    �Paul, you're with me. Postie loves to see his bombs go off in person. No remote viewing for him. He has to be somewhere on the beach.�
    Paul nodded in agreement. �Let's try those apartments over there.� He motioned to a series of 4-story beach side condos. �He's probably watching this place with a pair of binoculars.�
    �Binoculars. Do you have a pair with you?� Lyn was reward with Paul's field binocs, drawn from his fanny pouch. She quickly scanned the apartment balconies, and instantly saw the tall, lanky form of Postie, who himself was looking out with his field glasses. �There's the freak!� Okay, guys, me and Paul are going to nail Postie. Just keep up appearances.
    Roger, Lyn, her friends replied in unison.
 

8

�What was I thinking? I knew I should've bought these boobies at Nordstroms!� One of the women said, crying into her boyfriend's arms. Attempted to, at least. The fake boobs made it difficult for her to turn around.
    �Don't say that,� June replied, sitting between the two affected women. �There's no way you could've known about this. Postie is one sick puppy. I was almost blown up by one of his devices, so I know how you two are feeling.�
    �Who are you?� The other woman said. She was sitting, legs underneath her and resting her arms on her bust.
    �I'm June Parlor of the New Darwin Police. Help is on the way. Just remain calm. Postie will not get away with this, I promise.�
    �Believe her. June always honors her promises.� June and the others on stage were startled by that announcement. Turning, June saw it was Dan Spirit Talker, fellow cop and friend.
    �Dan, what are you doing here? Don't tell me, you're sick?�
    Like Harold, Dan made a totally unconvincing fake cough. �Yes. I believe Central Station is suffering from Sick Building Syndrome. I just had to leave before my condition got worse.�
    �Your secret is safe, Dan. I don't suppose you know any medical tricks to make these boobs come off safely?�
    Dan got down to his knees and inspected the fake breasts of the woman to June's right. �Hmm... no bioglue. Definitely not standard. Postie must've used nanohooks and probes.�
    June looked despondent. �So we can't tear them off without ripping the skin underneath as well. And we can't override the software. Postie is probably monitoring these breasts for just that thing.�
    �There is one thing I can attempt, June. Postie needs to be distracted for a good three minutes while I do my work. Have they found him yet?�
    �They have. Tune to ware channel 57.� Dan did just that, enabling him to follow Lyn and Paul's progress. A particularly silly thought occurred to June. �Say, you're not going to use that psychedelic voodoo power of yours?�
    Dan gave June a flabbergasted look. �It's not voodoo, June. It's the spiritual power I inherited from my shaman ancestors. Can you at least accept the fact that I have unique talents?�
    �Sorry, Dan. I just had to tease you, trying to loosen the tension around here. No offense�
    �None taken.� Dan had June move out of the way and sat between the two women. Their breasts were brushed up against Dan's legs. �Now, what are your names?�
    �Lita.� The one to Dan's left said.
    �Sally.� The women to Dan's right replied.
    �Lita, Sally, I want you to relax and still your minds. Fixate on a peaceful scene, think only of happy thoughts.�

9

Back on the beach the crowd around the stage had actually grown. The threat of Postie's detonations was more than matched by the crowds' desire to see the cops' succeed. They hoped the cops would succeed, otherwise they had good front row seats when the plastiskin breasts explode!
    Dan continued his meditative effort, making the two inadvertent bomb-women relax. By way of his �ware connection, he followed Lynnae's confrontation with Postie. As long as Postie stayed away from the window, Dan felt he had a good chance removing the fake boobs.
    Amber and Bert found out what was happing and made their way to the stage. So any news about the bomb squad? Amber said.
    June shook her head, though Amber couldn't see it. They're still ten minutes out. I believe Dan will have the situation well in hand before that, provided that Lyn can keep Postie occupied.
    Amber made a mental quizzical noise. Lynnae? What's she planning?

10

The sun crept downward toward sunset. The gang gathered at a seaside food court, going over the day's events. Postie, by the strangest luck, had escaped. Stamp had set off several smoke bombs in the building in addition to the small charge in the apartment, making Paul and Lynnae get out before they suffocated. At least the beach was saved from Postie's bombs and Iggy Kolstien was locked up for selling hot merchandise. But that wasn't all.
    The Wet Tee contest was held after all, sans fake breasts. It was no surprise that June won, having the most desirable body on stage. She got the sash of first place, but the 1,000 credits she gave to Lita and Sally. Despite what they went through, the two women were bent on getting genuine, non-exploding  plastiskin breasts with that money.
    �Getting generous in you old age, June?� Lynnae teased. �You would've pocketed that money in a heartbeat last year.�
    �So true, Lyn. But I have all the treasure I want right here.� June turned and kissed Greg on the cheek. �Lyn, isn't that Paul's tank top you have on?�
    �It is. When that small bomb went off the straps on my suit were ruined. Paul was gracious enough to loan me his shirt for now.�
    June laughed. �I'm not so sure. In some ancient cultures, when a woman wears an article of clothing given by a man, that woman is considered engaged to that man.�
    Lyn got defensive. �You're just making that up. Me and Paul are just friends.�
    Sitting next to Paul was Amber. She inspected Paul's abdomen, making him wonder what she was up to. �You're still friends with him. Paul saw your naked boobs for a moment. Since his kidneys are still here that means you trust him. Like him even. Really like him!�
    �Pixie! Your assertions have no legs to stand on. You'll make more money as an exhibitionist instead of a cop, judging by your antics earlier today. Maybe you can be the new actress playing the lead on Nude Attack Woman!� Lyn stuck out her tongue.
    "You're right, Lyn. Wanna see them?� Amber playfully pulled up her huge t-shirt partway, exposing the bottoms of her breasts. �After all, I'm the one with the talents here!�
    That comment started a spirited discussion of �whose's talents are the best'. The men - Paul, Dan, Greg, Harold, and even Smudge - wisely kept quite while the women went hammer and tongs for the better part of an hour.

[End Credits: still shots from the current episode and theme music plays. Ends with the duo in silhouette. Fade to black.]

[Epilogue]

Two kilometers away, in his condo penthouse, was Mr Big. At the moment he gazed out over the rapidly darkening landscape. The binoculars were focusing on one point on the beach in particular.
    �Why, I don't believe my aging eyes! Let's get some sound!� Big manipulated some controls on his binoculars, activating the 25th century equivalent of a shotgun microphone. Thus he was able to follow the animated discussion he was viewing.
    Lynnae - �Shut up, little Nora Nanite! I bet you can't get up if you let your breasts revert to normal flesh. You, for all practical purposes, have inflated fat bubbles on your chest!� For emphasis, Lyn poked one of Amber's boobs, making the classic anime breast-poking sound (plink).
    Nadia - �That's unfair, Lyn! You might as well criticize me. Now I know why you don't have a boyfriend. I bet you crushed every man you hugged with those 5 kilo wonders!� Nadia, in turn, poked Lyn's tank top-clad chest a few times. Amber did the same to June. Poke, poke, poke!
    June - �At least Greg is man enough to endure my natural charms! I bet your boobs sound like helium balloons when you rub them! Not to mention that you two have to wear ankle weights all the time, lest you want to float away!� Not to be left out, June poked Nadia and Amber's boobs. More of the poking sound was heard (plink, plink, plink).
    Amber - �Nadia, I say they have 15 kilo wonders! And they suffocated their men instead of crushing them!� Soon the discussion dissolved into a mutual poke fest, and Big was getting aroused.
    �Yes, yes, go ahead and have your fun now, coppers. For in a few weeks you'll remember this as one of the good times!� On cue, Big laughed, hacked, and coughed.
    Daisy, one of Big's �companions', came out from the bathroom. �Biggy, thank you for the suit! It's wonderful! I'll have fun swimming after getting my tan tomorrow.�
    Big turned. Daisy had a 210cm bustline, her watermelons practically �overflowing' from the top of the one-piece she had one. �Daisy, dear, I'm afraid we'll need three bottles instead of one. And two of those have to be jumbo size!�
    Daisy giggled. �Behave!� She playfully commanded, pushing Big's head inbetween her breasts.
    �I can't promise anything.� Big's muffled voice replied.

After a few moments of black a commercial came on

Movie Promotion:
�In 15 days the movie event of the summer will �bust out' onto a tri-dee screen near you! Police Blue: The Movie. Friday, June 2.�
 

END

16