Bottled Genies 1-1: Efreet or not Efreet

    Robert sat in the window sill, watching the rain splatter down outside. It was a gloomy Sunday afternoon. He tapped on the closed book in his hand. He needed to finish it by the end of this week for his English class. It was too dreary a day to read. He wanted to do something else. He whispered a prayer hoping the rain would abate, so that he could at least go for a jog. Maybe if he went to church occasionally his prayers would be answered. He looked down at the book. If he read some, it would pass the time, and then the rain might stop. That�s not what the forecast predicted though. Rain for the next three days, and he had a track meet on Tuesday. He straightened out his glasses, determined to finish at least one chapter. The phone had other ideas, and disturbed him from his idleness.

    He grabbed for the telephone, shouting, "Hello," into it a bit louder then he should have. The person on the other end didn�t seem to mind.

    "He�s not here right now," Rob replied to the voice on the other end.

    "It�s his birthday? He didn�t tell me that," Rob continued.

    "Well, he won�t be back for a while. I can come get it."

    "Not a problem. See you soon," he ended, hanging up the phone.

    Robert sat there, and glanced back out the window. Today was Jon�s birthday. How long had they known each other? How long had they been roommates? Robert thought for a moment, realizing he never once really pried into Jon�s personal life, even for pleasantries like birthdays, and such. John wasn�t an easy person to get information from. He gazed out the window to the damp woods in the distance. Somewhere out there Jon was probably wandering around, as he had habit to do, and on his birthday no less. Despite the gray misery which loomed outside, Robert was determined to make this a great day, now more than ever. He had something to celebrate. Hopefully, he though, so did Jon.

    The rain chilled Jon as he stood at the edge of the bluffs. Dampness soaked through his heavy denim jacket. Invisible tears ran down his face. If he stayed out here any longer, he would catch a death of cold. Maybe then he wouldn�t feel so guilty.

    The ground shook, as a flash from the sky cascaded on to the rocks below. The thunderous roar echoed around him, deafening him into submission. He collapsed on to the ground, hiding his head, yet the roar echoed, ringing in his ears. He looked out across the cliff edge, at the bank down by the river.

    A red glow shined through the dimness of the rain where the lightning had struck. Was it a fire, somehow created in this damp? He strained to see. It wasn�t embers, but more of an unearthly glow. A kind that could not be described. Could it be his dream, his one true wish? Impossible. He ducked his head down and clamped his hands around his ears. The ringing continued, but was subsiding. He looked back over the edge, and considered what had brought him here. His one wish robbed from him years ago. His last vestige of childhood fantasy, gone. It was still there, not fading or growing, just shining, like a beacon of a lighthouse, calling him. Did he get too close to the edge and fall, now lying unconscious down below? His numb skin from the cold rain convinced him otherwise.

    A resolve filled him, and his curiosity won out. He was destined to improve his life one way or another. Maybe that glow was a sign of some kind. A chance to revive his dream. He needed to know. Jon looked down the banks of the cliff. It would be a treacherous and muddy climb. He would most probably break his neck sliding down the hill. He was determined, and plummeted down the cliff face anyway.

    He reached the bottom with little physical damage. Only a few snags from bramble and branches. A small cut had opened above his left eye, but the rain washed away the blood. Otherwise he was caked in mud and his shoes were filled with the stuff. His socks had turned cold from the damp. Jon sneezed. He was getting sick. Maybe he would get pneumonia and pass out, only to be found by morning light. The gray of the sky grew darker. He scanned around for the red phantom that had summoned him down here. He saw naught. It had just been across the small creek. He was certain. Jon trotted toward water. He was drenched enough, a small swim couldn�t do more harm. He jumped in, misjudging how much the river had filled from the rain, and plunged under the surface.

    Jon panicked beneath the cold, wet stream. What the hell was he doing? He knew this was crazy, but something nagging drew him on. He needed to know what that unearthly force was he saw. At least this would wash most of the muck off. Struggling, he pulled himself up, and waded the rest of the way. He could make out the spot he had seen the flash at, up ahead, just beyond some bushes. His second wind kept him going as he lumbered out of the water, back into some more mud. So much for getting cleaner. He pulled his foot out of the muck, only to have his right shoe sucked off, along with his sock. Jon reached down to where the forlorn piece of clothing went, grabbing out handfuls of dirt and mire, but nothing more. The earth claimed his shoe. The natural elements seemed to be conspiring against him, barring him from his goal. That only fueled his determination more.

    He lunged out of the mud, towards the bushes, pushing them aside. Lightning flashed overhead, illuminating the ravine. He looked at his goal, where he had seen the illusionary force. Nothing was there. Only the charred remnants of something that could have been. Story of my life, he thought, as Jon collapsed into a ball and cried.

    It was several hours before Jon made it home. His jacket had acquired a few more battle scars from his attempt to climb out of the ravine, and he received another slice, just behind his ear, from a particularly strong thistle bush. At least he was still alive, and life wasn�t so bad after all. He sneezed. It was a pretty dumb thing to do, treading out into the rain like he had. All he wanted now was to relax and thoroughly clean himself. At least he wouldn�t have to face anyone. He pulled his keys out of his pocket, and opened his apartment door.

    "Surprise!" shouted several faces as people rushed towards him, then stepped back. Jon jumped back as well and stared at the intruders. Robert, his roommate was there, along with Cynthia and Sheryl from across the hall. Their expression was priceless, open jaw, wide eyes, and pale faces. It was as if they had seen a monster. Jon snickered, realizing he was the boogie man that had scared them all.

    "Man, are you ok?" Robert gasped.

    Jon looked down at his bare foot, and their gazes followed, and then back up at his friends, and laughed, "It�s a long, long story. I need to get out of these wet things."

    "I�ll get a towel," Cynthia piped up, dashing from the room.

    "Man, I thought you looked bad before, you look like hell now," Sheryl added her two cents.

    "Love you too, dear," Jon sneered, reaching up to give Sheryl a hug.

    "Get away from me," she shouted playfully as she dashed toward the kitchen.

    "I am the creature from the black lagoon, and I�ve come for you," Jon aped as he waddled, following her.

    Robert shook his head in disbelief. Only Jon could come home looking like that, yet still be as jovial as ever. Maybe he knew Jon better than he suspected. If only Jon knew himself, and what he wanted. A scream came from the kitchen. Jon had probably cornered Sheryl, and given her a wet, mucky hug. She�d forgive him in a few minutes. Robert looked back down the hall. Cynthia had come back, looking lost, and clutching a towel. If only Jon wasn�t so clueless about other people. More screams emanated from the kitchen, followed by laughter.

    "Let me take care of this," Robert whispered to Cynthia as he pulled the towel from her hands.

    "Hey, Jon! Let�s get you dried off so that we can throw you a proper birthday party," Robert shouted, as he opened the kitchen door, and tossed the towel at the sparing couple.

    "I�ll dry off, only if you have enough to wet my thirst. I can drink a river," Jon shouted triumphantly.

    "It looks like you have," Robert joked back.

    Jon dried off quickly, and polished off several drinks before the party finally ended. Sheryl drank as much as well, and Cynthia helped her stumble home. Robert, who normally would down more than any one else, felt like he should remain sober. He nursed a beer all night, sitting quietly in the corner.

    "That was a stupid stunt you pulled," Robert scolded, after the girls had left.

    "Asi es la vida," Jon mumbled barely coherent. Robert just glared at him, and lit a cigarette.

    "So your Mom called earlier," Robert continued, changing the topic.

    Jon�s eyes widened, giving a hint that he was more sober than he pretended.

    "Wishing me a happy birthday?"

    "Amongst other things. She had a present for you. I picked it up earlier," Robert said, while getting up to go to the closet.

    "What is it?" Jon asked, trying not to get his hopes up.

    Robert shrugged, and pulled the gift out of the closet. It was a brown box, large enough to hold a toaster oven. No wrapping covered it, and there were no marks. Only a layer of dust settled upon it.

    "Looks like she�s had it for a while," Robert stated, offering the gift to Jon.

    The box had a familiar look to it. Jon picked up a pair of scissors that had been lying around on the coffee table, and opened the box. A cloud of dust rose. Jon sneezed again.

    "So what is it?" Rob asked.

    Jon just gawked at the contents. He pulled out a card that had been resting on top, and put it to the side. Robert looked in. The box was full of torn up shreds of an old newspaper, and an item, wrapped in brown paper. Jon quickly tore the paper apart, and pulled out the object. Both men gasped at the same time. Jon was holding an ornate bronze vessel that looked similar to a bowl.

    "What the fuck is that?" Robert asked again, astonished.

    "It�s a brazier," whispered Jon, as he slowly twirled the object in his hands.

    "A what?" Robert exclaimed, "That doesn�t look like a bra!"

    Jon laughed at Rob, "A brazier, not a brassiere. It�s a type of vase, used for burning things."

    "Oh," Robert nodded, "Can I see it?"

    Jon passed the bronze bowl over to his friend. "Be careful with it."

    Robert examined the brazier. It was tarnished and old. He picked up the towel that had been used to dry off Jon, and started to rub it clean.

    "So why did your mom give you a brazier?" Rob asked. The dirt was being more troublesome to remove than it appeared, and he rubbed harder.

    "Not my mom. My grandma left this to me," Jon replied.

    "Whoa!" Rob shouted almost dropping his cigarette.

    Jon had just finished opening the card, and was startled by Robert�s yell.

    "What?" Jon asked.

    "Look at this," Robert said, while turning the section he cleaned toward Jon. An image of an Arabic city was etched in the vessel. Figures seemed to be slowly moving about the city as he turned the bowl. Robert shook his head. It was only a trick of the light. Jon stared into the scene and felt himself getting lost, pulled away. It reminded him of the ghostly fire. He shuddered, returning to reality.

    "This thing most be worth a fortune," Robert gasped.

    "It�s priceless," Jon sighed as he leaned back.

    Robert put the brazier down on the coffee table, and looked across to his friend, expecting and explanation. Jon ignored him, and read the card. Robert sipped his beer and waited, but no answer came.

    "So what�s the story," he asked, "Why is your grandmother giving this to you?"

    "Gave," Jon corrected, "She passed away six years ago today. A rather unpleasant birthday surprise."

    Robert stammered slightly, caught in his error, but not able to express the proper emotion. A tear started to form on Jon�s eye, as he tried to remember the details.

    "Has it been that long already? I had forgotten all about it," Jon lied. In truth he had been waiting for this day. "When I was younger, probably seven or eight, I was visiting my Grandparents for the summer. They lived in Virginia. My older brothers were also there. It was a fun summer."

    "Well one day, my grandmother took the three of us down into the basement. The whole summer long, we could go anywhere we wanted. Upstairs, outside, downstairs, but there was one room we were not allowed in," continued Jon, "So she took us downstairs, and into the room. Man, the room, it was incredible. I was in awe just looking at all the things in there. There were vases, and painting, and jewelry, and stuff. It was unbelievable."

    Jon sighed, and blew his nose on a tissue.

    "Of course I was just a kid, so my imagination is probably going wild, but I do remember this," he said pointing to the brazier. "Grandma said that each of us were allowed one thing. When we were old enough, and responsible, we could take care of it ourselves. Until then she would hold on to it for us. I was amazed. All this treasure, and I could have one thing, and that�s when I saw it."

    "It was sheer beauty. It was still as dirty as it is now, but something about it was magic. I knew that�s what I wanted. I didn�t care about where it came from," Jon stopped, and gazed down at the bowl, before continuing, "Grandma made us promise to keep this a secret. To not tell anyone, friends, relatives, no one. It was a family secret, that everyone knew, but no one spoke of. I probably shouldn�t be telling you this, but then, I�m so drunk right now, I probably couldn�t tie my own shoes."

    Robert snickered at that. Jon was tipsy, but had a clarity of mind. Something about this bowl sobered him up fast.

    "One of my childhood dreams was one day, I would own this. I didn�t care about cars, or girls, or computers. I just wanted this, and knowing one day it would be mine, all mine, brought me a peace of mind like none other. I cried the day she died, and for two months straight after that. I had told no one of the secret, not even my brothers who were with me, and I was certain she had kept the secret all to herself. No one else would know that this was to be mine," Jon sighed, and a tear slid down his cheek, "No one else knew."

    Robert looked down at the brazier. It was very pretty. He could see how someone could become enamored with it. Just looking at it gave him a sense of peace. It was definitely special.

    "So where�d they get all this stuff?" Robert asked, still gazing at the bowl.

    "That�s the family secret," Jon replied, before sneezing again, "My grandfather, Henry Miller, was originally Heinrich Mueller."

    Robert shrugged, confused.

    "He served in the German army during World War two," continued Jon.

    "He was a Nazi?" gasped Robert.

    "Yes, and no," Jon stated, "He served in the army before Hitler took power, and then afterwards, he was too scared to leave. He didn�t want his family to be persecuted, but he didn�t want to fight either, so he transferred to a warehousing unit. Granddad was a supply clerk who kept track of various treasures the Germans looted. He was an honest man, regular church type, with an appreciation for art. When the order came down to destroy most of the treasures, he couldn�t stand idle. Granddad would select pieces from the list to be destroyed, and hide them away. Then he�d send a message saying the order was complied with. How much he collected, or even how he got it all out of Germany is a mystery to me."

    "Wow," Robert gasped, "So what are you going to do?"

    "What do you mean?" Jon asked perplexed.

    "I mean this is a stolen artifact. Twice stolen. It should be returned to where it came from."

    Jon picked up the card and read, "Baghdad."

    "Oh," Rob sighed, "That�s in Iraq. Can�t send it there."

    "It�s not going anywhere," Jon replied, "I can�t sell it, I can�t show it to anyone, and I can�t give it away, without endangering my whole family. I�m sure every member has some piece or another."

    "Well, you could always tell people it�s an ashtray," Robert joked as he flicked his cigarette into the brazier.

    Without warning, fire flared out of the vessel, followed by black rolling smoke.

    "Fuck," the two men shouted in unison.

    "Get the fire extinguisher," Robert cried as he stumbled out of his chair.

    Jon just sat there and watched the flames. There was something entrancing about how they danced about from the brazier. The smoke continued to roll out, forming a circle around the coffee table. Jon gasped as he saw shapes form in the circle. They looked like letters.

    "Wait," Jon shouted to Robert, "Look."

    Robert paused his frantic search for a fire extinguisher, and gazed at what Jon was talking about. Something was happening. The smoke was swirling up, joining with the fire, creating some shape. It looked like a pillar, rising from the fiery cauldron. He watched as two spirals broke away from the side. The top of the pillar rounded out, into an oval, and then he saw it. There was a face in the oval. It was becoming human. Robert gasped.

    "Greetings," said the form as it solidified. The face, arms, and torso looked less like fire and smoke intertwined, but more like well tanned skin. Tresses of fiery red hair rolled down her back, joining with her smoky bottom half. Jon gawked at the apparition of a woman that had appeared before them. Her eyes were brown with a hint of mauve. Her arms slightly muscular, with a tattoo band wrapped around the right one. Her breasts were dark and pert. Jon blinked. Breasts? Then he realized she was naked. The top half of a woman, floating on a pillar of smoke, completely naked. Jon was dumbfounded. Robert was panicked.

    "A demon," Robert cried. The creature ignored his accusations, and stretched her arms invitingly toward Jon.

    "Thank for freeing me from my prison," she yawned, "I�ve been in there for a long time."

    "What are you?" Jon asked nervously.

    "A demon," Robert shouted again.

    "I�m a genie," the creature spoke, ignoring Robert.

    "A genie, that just happens to look like a demon," Robert scoffed.

    "Will you shut up already?" The genie scolded, pointing her finger at him. Robert tried to respond, but no sound came out. He clutched his throat, and attempted to scream. Nothing. He was mute. Jon just watched in awe.

    "That�s better," the creature continued, "So for freeing me from my prison, I an entitled to grant you a wish."

    "Actually, he freed you," Jon said pointing at his friend.

    The genie huffed, "It�s moot who freed me. You�re the owner of my home, and therefor my master. The wish is still yours."

    "I don�t know," Jon pondered.

    "What�s so difficult, anything you wish, anything at all, will be yours. Just ask. Do you question whether I have the power to grant you your wish?"

    "No," Jon exclaimed. This was a dangerous and temperamental creature, he thought.

    "It�s just that you�ve been here five minutes, and silenced my best friend just for calling you a demon. How do I know you really are a genie, and not some malicious creature that wants my soul? With your reddish-tan skin, and the fire and all, you look more like a demon, than a genie."

    "How many genies do you know?" The creature impatiently asked.

    "Well none," Jon replied sheepishly.

    "Fine. Make a wish. I�ll grant it. You�ll have proof. Simple."

    "No," Jon replied nervously. Robert gave up trying to yell, and was scribbling furiously on a discarded tissue with a pen. He wasn�t very successful, as the pen was tearing the tissue apart.

    "No?" The genie scream, "How can you not have a wish you want granted? Anything you want, I will give you. It�s easy, just wish for something!"

    "Call this a hunch, or maybe playing too many role playing games, but red skin, fire, brazier, I�d say you�re an efreet, trapped in the brazier against your will, and forced to grant wishes, until at some point in the future you�re freed. In the meantime, any wish anyone makes will be perverted by you into a horrible curse, because you dislike your situation in life."

    It was time for the genie to be startled. In all her life, no one had been so bold to her. "How dare you!" She shouted.

    "Easy, I�m your master," Jon grinned, "and I�ve thought of a wish to satisfy you."

    The genie grew quiet and looked at Jon intently, "Yes?"

    "I wish you to be free," Jon stated smugly. Robert grabbed his own hair and pulled, trying once more to scream something.

    The genie gasped, "You can�t do that!"

    "It�s a wish. I made it. Grant it."

    "Goddess," the genie sighed, "Don�t mortals know anything."

    "What�s the trouble?"

    "Here, read this," the genie scolded, pulling out a large tome from the billowy clouds, "Summon me again when you have a real wish."

    With that she dropped the tome down on to the table, and vanished back into the brazier. The smoke magically faded, and the fire died out. Robert gasped, then noticed his voice was back.

    "Are you an idiot!" He shouted at Jon, "You have a genie, with unlimited power, and all you want is for it to be free. You can have anything you want!"

    "It�s an efreet, an evil genie worse than a hundred demons. No way am I going to make a wish to that creature."

    "But if the wish is worded right," Robert pleaded.

    "Wishes are never worded right for an efreet. They�d find a way to pervert it."

    "But..."

    "Look. I�m tired and I have a headache. I�m just going to chalk this up to a drunken illusion, forget it happened, and go to sleep." With that Jon got up, picked up the brazier, and went off to his bedroom.

    Robert watched him as he left, and then glanced down at the table. The book was still there. The title read, "How to Serve Man: A Guide to the Care and Feeding of your Genie." Robert shuddered, picked up the book, and went off to his own room for some late night reading.

    A few days had passed since the incident. Neither one had talked about what had happened. Jon was pacing up and down, talking on the phone. Robert was sitting at the window reading the handbook. It was raining again. Three days straight, and no sun. He was wondering if he�d ever get a chance to go jogging. At least the weatherman said it�ll clear up tomorrow. He yawned and put down the book. For a handbook, it sure was wordy. It read more like a legal document, but Robert was still able to understand it. If only he could get Jon to read it, or summon the genie again. He glanced over at his roommate. Jon had just gotten off the telephone.

    "So have you put any thought into summoning her again?" Robert asked, "I�ve been reading this book, and I think I know a way to insure that she can�t corrupt your wishes."

    "Robert, we�re not going to summon her again. Something bad will come of it. Please just forget about it, and throw away that stupid book."

    "But it�s so simple," Robert begged.

    "No, and that�s final," Jon demanded.

    "But all we need to do is," Robert pleaded, but was cut off in mid sentence.

    "I don�t have time for this. I have a date tonight," Jon griped.

    "You have a date tonight? You didn�t tell me. Who�s it with?"

    "Sheryl," Jon replied meekly.

    Robert was startled. He had known that Jon and Cynthia had been friends for years, and only recently had Jon met Sheryl. He also knew that Cynthia had been chasing after Jon all this time, just at a much slower pace. Those two should be the ones going out. Besides, Robert wanted Sheryl. He liked the tall, thin, athletic types.

    "Have fun," he wished sourly.

    "Will do," Jon replied as he headed out the door.

    Robert waited, skimming through the book. He listened as the door across the hall opened and closed, and watched through the window as Jon and Sheryl hopped into the car. Robert grinned, as he contemplated his plan. He just needed to get a few things ready, and he�d have his wish.

    Jon sipped quietly from his soda. The whole incident with the efreet still bothered him. He sighed inwardly, knowing he�d have to face it sooner or late. He looked across the table at Sheryl. She was poking at a shrimp with her fork.

    "What�s on your mind?" She spoke up, not looking at him.

    Jon gave her a bemused grin. "What do you mean?"

    "Well, we�ve been sitting here for five minutes, and you haven�t said a word. I�m beginning to think you don�t enjoy the company."

    "It�s not that," he protested, "Just something happened a few days ago that I can�t get out of my mind."

    She poked again at the shrimp on her plate. "Care to talk about it?"

    Jon was at a loss. How could he explain the efreet to her? He opened his mouth, grasping at words. "I prefer not."

    Sheryl pouted and picked the shrimp up. This isn�t how he wanted the date to go. He didn�t want to think about Robert, or that infernal being. He just wanted to relax, and have a fun time. He sighed, and resolved on telling her the truth.

    "You may find this hard to believe. I know I have. After the party, I received an odd gift. A genie in a bottle, so to speak. I don�t know what to do." He looked up to see her reaction. There was none. Across from him Sheryl sat frozen, with the shrimp balanced precariously inches from her mouth. A faint smell of brimstone waft through the air. Jon waved his hand in front of Sheryl. She hadn�t moved. She was frozen, as if stuck in time. He glanced around the room. Everyone was in a similar state. Well, almost everyone. He noticed one figure sitting at a nearby table looking at him. It was the demon.

    "My, that is hard to swallow, darling," the creature spoke, "You seem to of startled the whole restaurant. Too bad none of them heard you."

    "You," he hissed, "what are you doing here?"

    The efreet smiled in a sinister way. "I was summoned to grant a wish. I thought it might have been you, but I was wrong. I guess I should go visit your friend. Maybe he called me." In a snap of her fingers she was gone, and time flowed again.

    "I�m not very hungry," Sheryl spoke up, upset at the way things were going. She looked up, and noticed him staring over at an empty table. Sheryl placed the shrimp back down.

    Jon was still shocked at what happened and hadn�t heard what she said. "I need to go home now," he exclaimed.

    "Is everything alright?" She pouted.

    "I just need to go."

    Robert was sitting there on the bed watching the brazier. Nothing happened. He had thought he had done everything correct. Shoot, all he had to do was light it, which he had done, but to no effect. No smoke poured out, no flames shot up, and no genie appeared. Maybe he needed some oil, or special powder to burn? All he had was a bottle of Crisco in the kitchen cabinet and an incense stick in the junk drawer. Guess that would have to do, he thought, and headed out to get the supplies.

    After he left the room, smoke began to pour out of the brazier, flames shot up to the ceiling, and she appeared, filling half the room with her essence. "Why have you summoned me?" She bellowed, before realizing the room was empty. It was the most spectacular entrance that no one had ever viewed.

    Robert had grabbed the Crisco, then rushed back into the room after hearing the commotion. "Wow, I didn�t think you were going to come."

    The genie looked at the bottle and blinked. "So instead you grabbed some oil? Some men are so desperate."

    Robert blushed realizing she was naked again. "It�s not for me, it�s for you," he stammered. The creature just stared at him.

    "I mean it�s for summoning you. You didn�t show up immediately like last time, so I thought I needed something extra."

    "Cooking oil?"

    Robert bowed his head, "Sorry."

    "It�s ok," she winked, stepping out of the smoke. "So why did you summon me? Still think I�m a demon, or do you accept that I�m a genie? You know I can only grant wishes to Jon."

    Robert looked up at her, and was reminded again of her lack of clothes. He gulped, "Um, could you change?"

    Confused, she looked down at her body. Nothing seemed wrong. She glanced at Robert. He was staring at her breasts. "Like this?"

    Robert had been expecting some clothes to appear. He gasped at what really happened. Her figure changed, after all it was what he asked. Her breasts swelled outward, quickly increasing in size. Robert gawked. She was amazing. He reached a hand out, as if to touch one of her expanding tits, then stopped himself. "Oh God, no!" although he was thinking yes, "that�s not what I meant."

    "What�s wrong?" She quipped, shaking her new assets. "Don�t you like the way I look?"

    "It�s not that," Robert shook his head, "Look at me. People now-a-days wear clothes, and when I asked you to change I meant into some sort of outfit. It�s kind of uncomfortable standing in front of a beautiful, naked woman."

    She glanced down at the bulge in his pants. "I can see that. Very well." She snapped her fingers and a hot-red skin tight mini-tee appeared, barely containing her enhanced bust, followed by a pair of denim shorts.

    "That�s only slightly better, it�ll do."

    "So I ask for a third time, why did you summon me?"

    Robert stuttered. He was still staring at her bosom. "Um, simple. Jon won�t wish anything, so I figured you�d be around for a while, and needed to catch up on some things."

    "Uh, huh."

    "Come, I have a surprise for you in the living room."

    The ride home was miserable. Jon, angry with Robert for releasing the creature, ignored Sheryl�s attempts at conversation. She was at a loss to why Jon was ignoring her, and resolved never to date neighbors again. When the car arrived home, Jon didn�t even wait for her. He rushed up the stairs to his apartment, and burst in. Sitting at the dining room table was Robert and that thing. She was wearing clothes this time. Pizza boxes rested on one side of the table.

    "Why did you do this?" Jon shouted at Robert as he stormed in.

    Robert glanced at the lady, and back at Jon. He had just taken a bite of pizza, and his mouth was full. He gulped quickly.

    "What�s going on?" Sheryl asked as she followed behind Jon. He had forgotten all about her. Some date. He should have made some excuse before leaving her. Now he was furious at Robert for ruining his date.

    "Sheryl, this is Rubina Harazon. An international student from Iraq." Robert pointed to the elegant female sitting across from him. Sheryl cringed at the sight of the beautiful, busty woman across from Robert. No wonder Jon was in a hurry to get home. Ruby waved a friendly greeting, and tried to say something, but her mouth was also full of pizza. "Ruby, this is Sheryl, our neighbor."

    "I love this pizza," Ruby said, swallowing. "Don�t have anything like this from where I come from."

    Jon screamed. This was too much. He had to think. What should he do? He turned to his date, "Sheryl, I�m sorry things didn�t work out, but I really need to talk to my roommate right now."

    "It�s okay," Ruby beamed, "use the backroom. I�ll keep her company. Want some pizza?"

    Jon glared back at her, and Robert bowed his head shaking it.

    "That�s ok. I need to go home," Sheryl stated, and hurried out of the apartment.

    Jon turned back toward them after Sheryl left. "What the fuck are you doing, and what happened to her chest?"

    "Eating pizza, grew" Ruby chimed, seemingly oblivious to the problems.

    Jon was dumbfounded. Pizza made genie�s chests grow? "Robert!" Jon shouted.

    "Look, you weren�t going to use the wish, and who knows how long she�s been trapped in there. I figured I�d let her catch up with how the world�s changed."

    "I want you out of here," Jon growled at the efreet. She blinked, and looked back at Robert. He had pulled something out from under the table.

    "No can do," Robert replied, opening the book. He skimmed down the page. "You may be her master, but only the summoner may dismiss her before she completes her task."

    "That�s true," Ruby added.

    Jon glared at the two like they were insane. "What?"

    "And unless I get my wish, I�m not getting rid of her."

    "I can leave on my own accord," the genie added again.

    "No, this isn�t happening," Jon muttered as he paced across the floor. "Why is this happening?"

    "Ok, you get your wish. Genie, you want to grant a wish, and Robert wants a wish, so just get it over with," Jon sighed.

    "I get to grant a wish?" The genie smiled. "I haven�t done this in a thousand years, I hope I remember how."

    "Just remember, anything that happens is your fault. She�s gonna curse you," Jon warned.

    "So are you ready?" Asked the genie.

    Robert smiled, and patted the book. He had a few aces up his sleeve and was ready. "I wish to be the desire of every woman," he stated boldly.

    "Oh shit," Jon sighed, "That�s too easy to screw up."

    "That�s what I do best," Ruby grinned. Energy began to flow from her finger tips, and the smell of ozone filled the air.

    "Wait," Robert called out, "Call time out Jon."

    The energy continued to fill the air. Swirling mists surrounds Robert.

    "What? Time out?" Jon said. The energy ceased building. A frown crossed Ruby�s face.

    Robert opened the book. "Any effect of a wish granted by the genie to someone besides the master, which does not directly effect the master, can be determined by the master. In essence, you can change the wish, breaking the efreet's curse."

    Jon was stunned. "Is this true?"

    Ruby nodded her head. "Didn�t think you�d get through all those rules in there."

    Robert grinned. "All you had to do was read the book Jon. It�s not as bad as you thought."

    "So what�s it going to be?" Ruby asked Jon. "I can�t keep this energy swirling forever."

    "I don�t know, what choices do I have?"

    "Well, I could fulfill the wish the way he wants, and make him the ultimate stud god, or I could change the perspective of every female, so that he was their ideal."

    "Not sure I like the choices," Jon muttered, "What would you have done?"

    Robert gasped, "What�s wrong with those choices? Make me the stud god!"

    "Well, probably something like this..." Ruby leaned over to Jon and whispered in his ear.

    "I like it," he shouted. "Serves him right."

    Ruby grinned, and the energies flowed again. Robert screamed as they flowed through him, warping him to meet the wish. "I wanted to be the stud god," he whined.

    "Nice look," Jon giggled.

    "I think it suits well," the genie chortled.

    Robert just glared at them. "There�s no way you can twist the wish to mean this."

    "Oh yes I can," Ruby retorted. "Consider how much time women spend looking in magazine, or putting on make-up, or primping or preening to look perfect. What is it they desire?"

    Jon laughed again. The change was incredible. Where once stood a tall, muscular man, now stood his female counterpart. Shapely hips, rising to a narrow waist, and continuing to breasts that threatened to cause his form to topple over. He was a cartoon of a female. He was no longer a he. Flowing blonde hair cascaded down past rosy cheeks and ruby lips. Bright green eyes fluttered of their own accord. Nothing left would suggest that he was ever male.

    "What am I going to do?" Robert waved her dainty arms. "Wait I know, Jon, it�s in the book, any wish not made by the master can be cancelled at any time by the master."

    "Why would I do that?" Jon snickered. He wasn�t going to leave his friend like this forever, but it was fun pretending.

    Ruby blinked, and licked her lips. "Over a thousand years. No food, no drink, no," she paused, "entertainment. I think I�m going to enjoy this. I�ll bring her back when I�m done." With a snap of her fingers, her form changed into one resembling Roberts old male form. Ruby grabbed Robbie close, lifting her off the ground, and if a puff of smoke, both were gone.

    Jon shook his head, and sat over in the couch. What a weird week it had been. He leaned over, picking up the book. "Not sure if she�ll be back anytime soon," he muttered to himself, "might as well read up on her then." He opened the book to the first page, and began reading.