****** The Pleasures of Horse Dung. A Manual for Horse Shit Lovers by Ekwin P N
                            Mahnoor, Hip Dr ******
===============================================================================

The Pleasures of Horse Dung. A Manual for Horse Shit Lovers


Ekwin P N Mahnoor, Hip Dr

Introduction.

This compilation is an attempt to make a sort of manual for would-be horse-shit
lovers as well as experienced horse-shit lovers. Here will be presented
possible ways of enjoying horse poop and pee, from the most simple and innocent
to the most extreme, but also some of the different precautions that have to be
made for security reasons.

In addition there is a short description of how cattle manure can be enjoyed in
similar ways.

The content is based on own experiences as well tales of experiences that have
been displayed in discussion forums and home pages on the Internet. The general
impression is that there is a quite large number of horseless horse lovers
seeking contact with each other and with horse owners and if nothing else,
seeking good pictures or stories of pooping and peeing horses, which seem to be
rare.

The aim is to make it easier for the already active horse shit lovers to better
understand their special inclinations as well as explain their interests. It is
also for curious but inexperienced horse lovers, including horse owners, to
realize and explore the possibilities of new pleasures. And perhaps to realize
that you are not that unique, after all.

So, why is horse shit interesting?

There are good indications that there are quite a lot of people that are
actively or passively attracted by the sight of a horse lifting its tail to
either defecate or urinate. There may be many reasons for that. Most children
are during some period fascinated by poop and pee, especially when it is big,
like when it comes from a horse or a cow. It is normal that this interest
vanishes after some time. Some adults may not have passed that stage, probably
due to too severe requirements on hygiene and cleanliness during childhood,
leading to that some may find pleasure in smearing and even eating human feces.
Few "normal" persons, however, would have an understanding or acceptance for
that.

Another reason may be that, from what can be seen on Internet, it is obvious
that there is a big interest in sex with animals. That is something that is
considered by most people as something perverse and is regarded in almost all
societies as taboo. Sex with animals can take many forms. Bestiality is usually
referred to as sex with animals just for the personal satisfaction, while
zoophilia is more seen as love of the animal for its own sake and with sex as a
something that should be voluntary and enjoyed both by the animal and the human
part. Zoophilia should therefore not be associated with force or cruelty to
animals. As long as no one is hurt or disturbed, it should be fully acceptable
from an ethical standpoint. Of course it is, in spite of that, questionable in
probably all societies.

For the overwhelming majority who is curious about what sex with animals is
like, it is something that is out of reach. There are, however a probably quite
large part of dog-owners that one way or another makes real good friends with
their pets. There maybe a similar large group of people that like horses, and
among them not so few that would like to physically feel their sexual powers.
And that is definitely something that just a few horse-owners can have access
to.

So, what do you do if you, for instance, are sexually attracted to horses but
have no horse of your own?

There is one solution that probably looks extra perverse, even to zoophiles.
That is the love of horse shit. Male and female of all ages can enjoy it as a
sexual stimulant. It does not have to be very perverse, after all. And it can
be enjoyed more or less without any direct physical sexual involvement with the
animal. Consequently, there should be no reason for moral objection to this
form of animal love. So, in principle, showing a seemingly inappropriate
interest in a horse's rump, should not, by default, be regarded as an attempt
to sexual abuse of the horse. Collecting fresh manure for the garden, or for
biological experiments, should be as likely an explanation as any.

Thus, should an interest in horse scat be acceptable? Can "normal" people take
an interest in this, instead of being repelled, and without feeling hopelessly
perverse? Yes, I think so.

Virtually everybody is now and then exposed to the sight of a horse lifting its
tail and drop a string of horse turds on a parade or a big pile in a public
place or in a countryside pasture.

First, I think, almost everybody would agree that a horse is among the most
beautiful animal there is. It is often tall, musculous with a shiny appearance,
that is it looks wellgroomed and clean. When looking in under the tail it looks
equally clean, so it is natural to consciously, or unconsciously, get the
impression that the shit produced also must be "clean". Again, virtually
everybody has, at some occasion, had a closer look at a pile of horse dung, and
probably not been directly repelled by its look (unless totally covered by
flies), since it is not soft, sticky and gooey, but usually firm and well
shaped.

On the other hand, since horse shit is fecal matter, it is normal to consider
that it is filthy and repulsive like all other kinds of excrements, if you
don't know what is special about the horse shit.

Thus, what makes horse shit attractive is:

1. It is big and heavy

2. It is made of pure grass or hay, that is, a simple and well-known
composition.

3. It is "clean". It doesn't smear your shoes.

4. It has an inoffensive, pleasant smell. Just smells horse.

5. It normally consists of well-formed balls with shiny surface.

6. It is hot when fresh.

7. It has nice brown-yellow-greenish color when fresh.

8. The way it is delivered.

A horse never looks more proud and beautiful than when it holds the tail high
in the air. So, a defecating horse automatically draws the attention by the
high tail, which also therefore may give the feeling that this is something
beautiful. It is, though, somewhat less obvious when urinating.

In addition to that, it can be noted that the horse's anus most probably is the
only of its kind that can be said to be beautiful. It big, well-formed and
symmetric. It is protruding, gives a powerful impression, and, again, it looks
very clean. The same can, of course, normally be said about the horse's
genitals.

What has been said about the horse is largely valid for other equines, like
donkeys, zebras and, as a matter of fact, rhinos, and to some extent of other
large herbivores (grass-eaters) like cattle or elephants.

All these things together make it easy to like the horse's shit and the act of
shitting. As a matter of fact horse shit of best quality is such a nice
substance that it probably should not be called "shit", since that gives
associations to something dirty and filthy. So dung from a big healthy horse,
eating pure hay or grass, is truly unique and it should be regarded as
perfectly decent to have very positive feelings for it.

I think that the pleasures of horse shit can be equally enjoyed by females as
well as males and by young or old, even if the interest seems to be most common
among young men.

A paradox is that it seems that it is very difficult to find, for instance,
pictures of pooping horses among everything more or less tasteless that is
offered on the Internet. It seems that such things could be classed as hard
core pornography, since it may have a sexually arousing effect on some people.
At the same time small girls are exposed to real horses, both shitting an
pissing in front of their eyes, without even thinking of it, while making the
daily chores in riding stables!

Not only that, they have to see huge erigated penises and winking vulvas as
well. It is strange that such things are not yet prohibited.

Before going further, a strong warning to sensitive people is appropriate:
Horse-shit watching and horse-shit playing can be addictive and may seriously
affect your future life!

Horse shit watching for the horseless.

Even if you don't have a horse of your own, there is a lot of pleasure you can
get from just watching horses or finding places with, preferably, fresh horse
shit.

The best thing to do is to visit a public riding stable and go to a paddock
where you can see some horse. It should normally not be a problem hanging
around for some time. It is quite normal to like horses and wanting to look at
them as beautiful animals and perhaps being interested in their behavior.
Roughly half of the time the horse stands idly, just dozing. When the horse has
decided that it will start grazing again it usually go rather straight to the
shitting grounds.

From that point of view it may be OK to have a small pocket binocular as well
to better see them, since a paddock can be fairly large, and if possible a good
camera. You should then look for areas where there already are piles of horse
shit. Horses normally deposit their droppings in certain areas where they don't
graze, and consequently the grass is higher then elsewhere. Even if the ground
is just dirt, you still find areas reserved as horse's toilettes. Especially
stallions are very careful to drop their dung on top of the pile of any
competing stallion. This phenomenon is in itself quite interesting to observe
and much has been written about the territorial behavior of stallions. Geldings
and mares don't care that much where they take a dump, but in general they
stick to the special areas.

Next thing to note is the color of the shit. You can estimate the age of a pile
by looking at the color. Fresh, newly deposited, shit normally has a bright
yellow brown color if the horses are fed on hay and a more greenish color if
they are grazing grass. The color slowly darkens and the surface of the balls
gets drier with time. Also the amount of flies decreases with time. After
something like half an hour the color is noticeable darker and after one to two
hours it is almost black. The surface still not dry, however. At the same time
the smell changes from the typical, somewhat spicy, horse smell to a pungent
sweetish odor, that may be less attractive.

Now, if you are watching a horse you would be interested to know if you could
expect to see the horse lift its tail to do the thing you wait for, within a
reasonable time. Long time observations shows that most horses tend to shit
more or less exactly every two hours, There seems to be a tendency that this
happens on even hours, like 8, 10 and 12 o'clock, etc. Possibly that may have
to do with feeding hours when they are stabled. Textbooks say that horses
defecate 5 to 12 times a day. What you should look for, in order to know if the
horse is going to shit soon or if you will have to wait for an hour or two is
to watch the tail and the anus. Ponies and cold-blooded horses (heavy horses)
keep their tail rather tight to the butt, except when swishing it from side to
side. However, if you notice that the tail looks a little tense and is very
slightly uplifted you should expect that that the horse will defecate within
half an hour. This is not so reliable, since various horses have very different
ways of holding their tails. An Arabic full blood usually keeps the tail so
high that you might think it is actually defecating. Occasionally the tail is
rapidly lifted a little, or maybe half way up, to let off a fart.

The way the tail is lifted is exciting in itself. Heavy horses and many ponies
usually lift their tails only halfway up in a more or less wide arch. Most
riding horses and show horses, on the other hand, very often lift their tails
very high, sometimes even arching forwards. Also the length of the tail means
very much for the sexiness of the high-held tail. A too long tail makes it
difficult to see what happens under the tail and a too short tail may look less
flashy.

Then you may be able to observe the anus and its shape. If you are close enough
you may note that if the horse has recently taken a dump, the anus will
normally be tight and protruding but still not soiled. As the rectum slowly
fills, there is a pressure from inside on the anus that makes it broader and
flatter. So, from there you can get a hint of whether the defecation is
imminent and worth waiting for.

If you find that it looks like it's about time, you may possibly try to shorten
the waiting time by encouraging the horse to move to the area where they
usually shit, if such an area is present. The horse will then be interested in
investigating the previous piles by sniffing them. If the time is not right,
the horse will not be seriously interested but just sniff briefly and pass on.

The most exciting moment is when, finally, after perhaps a long wait when the
expectations have been built up, the horse is in the right place, and after the
sniffing, the horse, if it is a stallion, lifts the head and takes a step or
two forward. Now, you should definitely expect the tail to begin to rise within
a second. If it is a mare or a gelding, the horse most often does not go
forward but starts lifting the tail while sniffing. If you have the right angle
of view, there are few sights that are more beautiful than how the tail is
raised high to a magnificent arch, or perhaps vertically and beyond, at the
same time as the anus begins to swell and bulge more and more. The wrinkles are
smoothed and it looks like an upside down bowl when the hole then rapidly opens
up and you get a first glimpse of a shiny glistening golden ball of pure horse
shit. Within seconds the hole has opened fully and a thick log of compressed
yellow brown balls, that may be up to five or six inches in diameter if the
horse is big, is being pushed out, and usually slightly upwards, by mighty
forces.

A horse that eats hay and spends much time in a stable will produce browner and
firmer turds, while a horse at grass will produce greener, and especially in
the beginning of season a considerably wetter and sloppier shit. After a couple
of weeks the digestive system has adapted so it is again firmer.

Depending on the character and quality of the shit, the log will break by its
own weight when it has extended some 4 to 8 inches. The sound when the big
chunk hits the ground and more muffled sound of the following pieces falling on
top of the growing pile, can be sort of exciting in that it gives a feeling
about weight of the whole thing. Of course it is more obvious when it happens
on a hard floor.

Particularly exciting is to watch horses shitting in public places, especially
when doing it in appropriate places or in appropriate moments. Parades,
circuses or zoos can be very rewarding and more so if small children are also
watching what horses may do. They often give very loud and clear comments about
what they see, to the embarrassment of their parents.

If watching parades or equestrian events, like show jumping, it is best to be
there at the start. Most horses get excited or nervous when they are expected
to perform in arenas with a lot of light and sounds and commotion. They usually
defecate within a minute after entering the arena. The same goes for parades.
When the parade starts it excites the mind, but also the motion itself, after
some more or less long waiting, stimulates bowel movements.

Playing with horse shit Even if horse tail watching can be very rewarding and
exciting, there is nothing that can be compared with close encounters with the
real thing. There is a number of ways, from the simplest to very advanced, to
experience the pleasures of pure fresh horse dung. But the pleasures you gain
from playing with the fruits of the horse's ass, depend very much on weight and
size, forms and texture as well as the color, smell and warmth of horse shit
that is fresh from he source.

Important:

Before having physical contact with horse dung, fresh or old, it is necessary
to be sure that one is inoculated against tetanus. Tetanus is a dangerous
illness that is caused by a virus in the soil and is almost always present in
the guts of horses and cattle. If these viruses get into the blood system they
will cause severe pain and stiffness in the muscles and may even paralyze the
breathing muscles. Therefore it is very important to be sure that there are no
open bruises or so, that can come in contact with the dung. That also goes for
the mouth if you want to chew or eat some of it. You must be sure that you
don't bleed in the mouth. Otherwise there is no danger to put it into your
mouth.

If you are inoculated you may still get infected, and you will then certainly
feel a considerable stiffness and some pain while moving, but it will disappear
within a couple of days.

But if you are properly inoculated, you could confidently enjoy all the
pleasures of fresh horse apples. Below will be described some different way of
obtaining and playing with fresh horse shit, from the simplest to the most
advanced.

Picking road apples. Horse shit for beginners.

The simplest way of getting to play with horse shit is to find roads, paths or
areas where horses normally pass by. There you may find piles or strings of
horse apples that may be more or less fresh. Around riding schools it is often
easy to find secluded roads or paths where you can be reasonably confident of
privacy, so that if you find an interesting pile you might go there and pick up
some turds. It is also often possible to get something from a paddock or
pasture, since horses quite often let their shit drop close to the fence. It
can therefore be rather simple to quickly bend down, stretch an arm and grab
something from a pile.

Of course, the fresher the pile, the more enjoyable it is. However, a very
fresh pile is likely to be covered by flies, which is not so attractive. The
best way to avoid them is either to be faster than them, or to choose the right
time. The right time is in the evening or night, when most flies are inactive,
or in a cold season when there are no flies around.

In order to be prepared, you should always carry with you some thin transparent
plastic bags. To pick up the shit you should take the plastic bag and fold back
halfway over your hand. Then you can take up the suitable amount of road
apples, and of course be careful not to pick up balls that are lying directly
on the ground, since they will be partly covered with dirt (!). With the bag
folded back you can now close it without any smearing of the shit on the
outside of it. If the shit is still warm, a nice thing to do is to tuck the bag
into your underpants and make it rest on your presumably hard cock. The weight
and the warmth, especially if you are lucky to have got almost the full load,
is just wonderful. It is very exciting to walk around, feeling the load of warm
horse apples hanging heavily on your cock, pressing it down, and just feel the
shapes of the firm compressed balls. Or else, you can place the bag right under
you, between your balls and anus. These sensations may be even more intense and
could probably be well appreciated by females This should not be confused with
the use of diapers that may be common among coprophiliacs. It needs to be
stressed that horseshit is something completely different and unique. Of course
there are many more ways to have a close encounter with the warm shit.

One particular reason why the shapes of the turds can be sexually arousing, is
that you, by moving your fingers lightly along and in-between the adjoining
balls, can get a feeling as if you were gently stroking a smooth and vaulted
vulva.

If you have got very fresh and clean turds you might be tempted to taste some
of it. Naturally the main question is: Is it edible, and if so, is it safe?

The answer is: Yes, it is edible and it is, according to all experience, safe.

As already mentioned, horse shit is almost pure grass or hay that has been
fermented in the big bioreactor that is the horse's guts. The horse's digestive
system is very inefficient, which means that almost everything that goes in
also goes out with rather little change.

The horse has a very small stomach so it cannot store the food there. That is a
reason why the horse has to eat almost all the time it is awake. The food is
transferred to the smaller intestines where it is mixed with bile, which gives
the brown-yellow color. Then it is fermented in the very large appendix (which
is only rudimentary in humans) with the help of cellulose decomposing bacteria.
These bacteria are completely harmless and are mainly recycled within the guts.
In the large intestines the decomposition products of the fermented grass
sludge are absorbed as nutrients and are later compacted into balls. As these
balls are transported further water is absorbed and the balls get firmer and
are covered with a thin surface of mucus to minimize friction so that the balls
glide easily towards the rectum. There the balls are collected until up to a
certain amount when there will be a signal to the brain that it is time to
empty the rectum. When the rectum is filled, it is squeezed from inside out
pressing against the anus. This way the collection of balls is pressed together
in the length direction and by passing through the powerful anus they are
compressed in the width direction, so that they are stuck together, giving the
characteristic shape of the emerging log of pure steaming horse shit. The
automatic urge to that is mixed with the instinct to do that at an appropriate
situation, like the encounter of a pile from a competing or inferior stallion,
or just in a previously pooped area.

The next question is: What are the dangers of worms and parasites? If you wish
to eat horse poop, you should definitely stick to horses from well kept stables
where you can be confident that they are healthy and that deworming is made
regularly and that the horses are fed good quality grass or hay. Even so,
parasites may occur, but in the feces they mainly exist as eggs. Therefore
manure piles in pastures are breeding grounds for worms and the parasites. If
the piles remain warm (not necessarily body warm) and moist the egg will hatch
and worms (larvae) will spread into the grass and later be ingested by the
horses. That is the reason why horses avoid to graze the grass around the
piles, and that is also the reason why horse owners want the piles removed from
the pastures or destroyed so that they dry more quickly and thereby preventing
the eggs from hatching.

At northerly latitudes, it is less likely to encounter unpleasant parasites
because of cold winters that minimize the number that can thrive in kind of
climate. Conversely, in southern or tropical countries, more care must be
taken. However, experience shows that in the countries of North America or
northern Europe, it is possible to eat a ball of fresh horse shit from horses
at grass as well as stabled horses without any bad effects of any kind. In one
case this has been done several times a year for several decades. So I would
consider it safe under such conditions.

The main reason that it seems to be quite safe is that any eggs in the shit
can't survive in the environment in the human guts and anyway they don't hatch
before they have passed through the human digestive system. Now, just the
thought of eating fresh droppings from a healthy horse is often quite exciting
for a horse-shit lover. As a matter of fact it may work as an aphrodisiac.

What is it like? The taste is almost the same as the smell, but pure horse shit
is very hard to chew. It is definitely fiber rich! It consists, as mentioned,
of the undigested parts of the grass or hay, which is pure fiber. It is also
quite protein rich from the harmless cellulose decomposing microflora in the
guts.

The simplest and best way to eat horseshit is to mix it with something softer,
like chocolate, fruit, like bananas, or bread. Probably you can mix it with
muesli to eat with yogurt or something similar. It is even possible to bake
bread containing horse shit as fiber enrichment.

Another way is to make horseshit tea. It is easy to make: Take one or two fresh
balls and place in a coffee filter. Pour on boiling water. You then get a
golden brown tea with smells of horse. The filter, however, gets rapidly
clogged by the non-fibrous content, so it is necessary to carefully scrape the
filter. To make the tea from boiling water has the advantage that you can be
less worried about possible parasites. A little more advanced is to make a
horse shit liqueur where you soak one or two balls in pure alcohol (for
instance vodka), add some sugar and then after some time filter it through a
coffee filter. To get a clear whisky-like liquid it is necessary to store for
quite a long time.

Horse shit playing for the more advanced.

If you own a horse or have access to a horse you know and under circumstances
that guarantees privacy, there are, of course, some more things you can do.

The most important is that you can be close to the horse's rear end. Caution:
To have a close presence behind a horse's butt, requires that you know the
horse well and that the horse knows you well. Never sneak up behind a horse
without having made your presence known. Preferably you should allow the horse
to see you and to smell you. Gently stroke the horse over the flank, while
talking softly, and continue stroking while moving slowly towards the rump. If
he, or she, feel comfortable with that you can proceed further.

In this context we will not deal with the sexual functions of the horse, just
the poop and pee.

The natural thing to do now is to see and feel what is under the tail. To do
that you gently slide your hand in under the tail till you reach the anus. When
you lightly touch the center of the anus the tail immediately lifts a little.
If you press your finger a little more the tail will raise much higher. Some
horses don't like this very much and they clamp down the tail to send that
message. Most horses, however, don't mind this, and lift the tail high. Now you
can examine the anus closer and look at its size and form. If you wet the
finger you can easily push it deeper into the rectum. Usually you will feel
that the soft pressure around your finger eases and the finger suddenly
effortlessly sinks all the way in, until stopped by the knuckles. That is
because there is gas inside the rectum, but not much enough to trigger a fart.
But when you gently push your finger in it, the lifting of the tail causes the
gas to be pressed out with a faint hissing. At this moment you easily feel if
there are some balls inside, or not, depending on the time since the last
defecation. After letting go of the gas, the horse normally will squeeze the
sphincter tightly around your finger, but not necessarily lowering the tail.
Any movement, even the withdrawal of your finger, will cause the tail to rise
somewhat again. If you do this with some care, the horse will not mind, and you
can keep your finger there quite a long time, although the tail will then be
lowered almost down to normal position. To do this now and then can be a way to
keep the horse reminded that you always are close behind, but of course he or
she must not be annoyed.

If we assume that you now have full access to the horse's ass without being
observed, and want to physically play with the shit, but still want to be able
to meet other people afterwards, the plastic bag will give you interesting
possibilities. The plastic bag should be the size of gallon, or three to five
liters, and be airtight. To be prepared, fold half the bag backwards, that is,
halfway inside out, and hold one hand inside the fold.

When the desired moment comes and the tail begins to rise, you should quickly
move your hand with the bag to the swelling anus and hold the palm just under
it so the big yellow-brown log can glide into the open bag. This way neither
your hand nor the opening of the bag will be smeared. A good idea is to try to
make the horse's magnificent shit glide along your straight arm so it can
remain unbroken. When the horse finally forcefully closes its anus, your bag is
filled with a pristine giant turd, which maybe is one, or one and a half, foot
long. Now take a deep breath down the bag and enjoy the aroma and feel the heat
that radiates from the turd, while trying not to break it. Then squeeze, or
suck, out the air and close the bag with, for instance, a rubber band. You now
have a long, heavy, turd of fresh warm horse poop, tightly kept together by the
thin transparent plastic bag and now you can feel the slightly slippery,
rounded forms of all the packed balls.

Since the bag should not be smeared on the outside you could try to carefully
slip it into your underpants. You could start with trying to see if your hard
cock could bear the weight of it. You could hang the bag across the cock, which
means that you break it, or you could just push it down in under your bottom.
That gives really great sensations. The bag also will be the best pillow you
could wish for.

This is probably the best way for females to fully enjoy the pleasures of a
complete load fresh horse shit. To feel the firm roundness of warm horse balls
glide along the pussy. Probably it may be equally enjoyable to let the bag
slide along the breasts.

Often, it is not possible to do such things where the horse is. In that case,
if you are well prepared, you can take the bag in a carrying bag and bring it
home, if that is possible, to any other suitable place. A good advice is to
wrap the bag in some newspapers, or some other insulating material, in order to
keep the shit warm.

If you have the possibility to bring the shit home and use the facilities at
home, you can warm the shit in a vessel with hot water (the plastic bag should
be tight) or perhaps even in a microwave oven. You must be aware that there
will spread a rather strong smell of horse manure in the house, if you open the
bag. If you can accept that, you can take a further step and play with the warm
dung directly. Preferably you can place yourself in a bathtub or showerbooth.
You can try to make some kind of arrangement where you can place the bag on a
shelf or in a hanging net, or something similar, at some height over yourself
and in such a way that you can tilt the bag in a controlled manner. Then you
could make the log glide slowly out of the bag all fall piecewise heavily onto
your crotch or your face and then you are very close to the real thing. The
feeling of this exceeds most other experiences. Just lying there, sensing the
warm, heavy horseshit covering your face, breathing the intense aroma through
the pile is almost beyond description. Equally intense is the feeling when the
heavy pieces fall onto your stiff cock, scatter into balls and broken balls,
covering the cock in a steaming hot cover. Probably it can be enjoyed in a
similar way by females. By clamping your hands around the pile you have an
excellent means for masturbation. However, when the pristine turd of horse shit
is broken to small pieces, it is not smooth or slimy, but rather rough, since
it is composed of just small splinters of undigested grass or hay. Again a
caution is needed: Females are in principle more sensitive to infections in the
urinary tract and therefore have to be more observant of the matters of
hygiene.

But, of course, it is even more exciting having the big poop delivered directly
from the horse's ass. So, if you have the possibility to safely stay by the
horse, in the pasture or other suitable place, without risk of being observed,
that is, while it is dark, you may try the same thing. This also has the
advantage that there are no flies around after dark.

To fully exploit such a situation you need to be well prepared. A list of what
you should bring with you would include:

- Old clothes and underwear that is disposable, since it is likely to be
severely discolored by the manure. It is wise to have underpants of the kind
that fit tightly around your thighs, and if possible use with suspenders.

- Plastic bags of various sizes, for instance one that could snugly fit your
head so that you could protect your hair from being colored (horse shit does
not permanently dye your hair; normal washing cleans it).

- A small plastic bowl.

- A bottle with half to one gallon of water.

- A soap

- A disposable towel

- A small mirror

- A torch

- A grooming brush could be useful

- Some food, since there may be long waiting for the right moment and also for
mixing with horse shit if that is of interest.

If you will attempt to collect the falling poop directly in your underpants, or
to lie down under the tail and with the head between the hindlegs of the horse
in order to let it poop fall upon you, strict caution must be taken.

It is of outmost importance that you know the horse well and that it is a calm
and well-balanced horse, as mentioned earlier. And not least, that it knows you
and likes you. Even so, the calmest horse is easily startled by an unexpected
sound or movement, likes the breaking of a twig, and may kick or make a move in
an unforeseeable way.

If there are several horses in the pasture, it may be difficult to establish
the right hierarchy. The leader horse will be very busy chasing away inferior
horses, which causes a lot of unrest. And unless you are able to take command,
you will be bullied too, which will make your intentions difficult to fulfill.

Now, if you feel confident with the situation, you may have the opportunity to
experience something of the most exciting and delightful a horse can offer. You
will also experience the real meaning of the words "horse droppings".

The simplest way to feel the warm horse dung is to be close to the horse's rump
all the way, making it feel your presence. You could for instance hug the butt
or sometimes just lean against it. While waiting, a good way to create
friendship is to groom the horse with a suitable brush. That is always popular.
When, finally, the horse moves to an area where there already lies some piles,
and it begins to more seriously sniff on then, you must be prepared. When the
tail begins to lift, you could sneak in under the tail, stretch the rubber band
of your underpants and let the turds just fall into the pants hitting your cock
or Venus mound. If you are female you can also let the emerging turd press
against your breasts or hold your arms so that you can catch it there. With the
pants filled with hot fresh horse shit, only your fantasy will be the limit.
The reason for having underpants with snugly fitting legs is that the turds
will not fall through but stay in place, and the reason for the suspenders is
that the shit is so heavy that you need one hand to hold the pants up.

Normally the horse will turn around and see what happened behind it and sniff
at the results. That is especially true for stallions, since they defecate not
only because they have to, but for marking territory or superiority over
competing stallions. A mare would be more likely to just walk away.

A little more advanced is to sit on the ground under the tail and let the turds
fall heavily onto your crotch. To make the horse used to your presence around
its hind legs it is useful to stay under the butt while grooming the insides of
its thighs. That keeps the horse calm and happy while it feels you are around
behind. That makes the risk for unexpected movements less. Some horses have an
instinct to move forward as they take a dump if the is something behind them,
like for instance a foal. However, it is not uncommon that foals are shitted
upon.

The perhaps ultimate experience is to lie down with the head right under the
anus, with face upwards. To lie there and see (depending on the degree of
darkness) or at least perceive the tail lifting higher and higher right above
you, and maybe see the anus swell, the turd being pushed out and rapidly fall
with full force right onto your face. That really is beyond description. Just
the anticipation of that happening, can be enough to make you cum. It is
important that you hold your arms so that the shit does not fall off, at the
same time, as it also is a certain protection of your head. The experience will
differ depending on consistence of the dung. If it is soft it will not easily
roll off your face but on the other hand make it difficult to breathe. If it is
hard, the sensations of the balls breaking and sliding over your face can be as
exciting. One way to fully experience this would be to use a plastic bowl or
bucket, where you make a cutout for your neck. Using this contraption you can
lie down with your face up under the tail and make the whole load stay in place
over your face. In addition you may have a little more protection of your head.

Now it is important that you know the behavior of the horse. While you lie
there with your face completely covered warm heavy and aroma rich horse manure
and without seeing anything, the horse, again will turn around to smell what it
has produced, especially as it is aware that something unusual is going on.
Normally the horse will just sniff for a minute and then walk away. If there
are many horses in the pasture it is likely that some of the others will be
curious about the strange things going on and come and smell too. But their
behavior can be more unpredictable

The horse-owner's horseshit delights.

What else can you do if you have your own horse(s) and stable? Not so very
much, concerning just horse shitting. The difference is, of course, that you
probably can do what you want whenever you want. And another important
difference is that you can be in full control of all the security issues that
usually restrict the possibilities to fully enjoy the pleasures of fresh horse
dung. A third difference is that you may have the advantage of being in a
position to train the horse to do the right things on command.

What about having the horse to poop or pee in selected places or in front of
consenting or dissenting people? You might, for instance, teach the horse to
poop or pee on certain objects to create, for instance, a minor "disaster". It
could be on a flowerpot or on a picnic blanket in a pasture, with all the
coffee or lemonade and cakes, or it could be on yourself when lying down on the
ground or floor.

Horse urinating.

Most of what has been said of the pleasures of horse shit can also be said
about horse piss and horses pissing. But of course there are large differences
in many respects. And there are, naturally, differences between stallions and
mares.

General

Horses urinate less often than they defecate. Usually 3 to 6 times a day. And
you practically never see a horse piss while in a parade, in a circus or in
equestrian events. They can do before or after.

But a horse will, almost at any cost, avoid peeing on a hard surface, like in a
stable aisle or on a street. Horses are namely extremely cautious about getting
wet by splattering urine. Only when they are standing on a soft ground (grass
or stable bedding) can they let loose. It is often considered as cruelty to
animals to let a horse stand for a long time on a hard surfaces. Carriage
horses in tourist areas normally don't have any options and have to accept the
unpleasant fact.

In pastures, horses don't have any preferred areas for urinating. They can do
it just anywhere, including where they normally graze. There is no obvious way
to judge when it is time for the horse to pee.

When urinating, horses of both sexes spread their hind legs and lean forwards,
while lifting the tail. The tail is usually not lifted as high as when shitting
and are often brought to the side, especially by mares. The general properties
of horse piss is that it is normally bright yellow but not necessarily clear
like beer. It more often not transparent, more like orange juice (except for
the color).

The amount of urine delivered depends rather much on the size of the horse,
whether it grazing juicy grass or eats dry hay, on whether it is working hard
or just idling and a number of other things. On the average you could expect up
to half a gallon, or one to two liters, each time.

Playing with horse piss.

It is more difficult to play with and enjoy horse piss than horse shit. You
can't collect it on the streets or in pastures. You need to have at least the
same degree of privacy as if you collect horse shit directly from the horse's
ass. It is more difficult to collect, for instance, in a plastic bag, which
must be really leak proof. Such a bag is also more difficult to carry away
without risking ripping it. It that case a big bottle or jar with a large
opening is better.

If you can do that you can play with it in a secluded place or in a bathtub as
with fresh horse shit.

To enjoy the horse piss directly from the source is, of course, different if
you do it with a stallion or a mare.

Stallions.

When a stallion or a gelding is going to urinate, the penis is either only half
way out, that is, still covered by the prepuce or it can be almost full length,
but loosely hanging.

To prepare to get pissed on you must first make the horse used to that you are
present under the belly now and then. This you may do by grooming the underside
or the inside of the thighs. If possible you could try to clean the penis when
it is out. The reaction to this may differ from time to time, especially if the
horse is not used to that. When it finally the right moment comes, it is
important to position yourself correctly. If you want to take a golden shower
you should let the beam fall onto your face or chest or crotch in such a way
that the urine does not splatter. Also, if you want to drink directly from the
hose, you must be prepared to swallow a lot and quickly, otherwise you may
cause the piss to spray around, when you can't take more, and in that case the
horse may try remove you.

If the penis is fully out, you can use it literally as a hose and flush on
yourself, even sideways, so you don't have to sit under the belly.

The mare.

Almost everything that has been said about the stallion is the same with the
mares. The difference is that you stand, sit or lie between the hindlegs of the
mare. Also, a mare often pees with a thicker stream than the stallion.

If you are lying so that the beam will hit your face, it is very difficult to
prevent splattering. Even if the horse doesn't move, it can quickly cut off the
stream, so you will get very little onto you, and it can be more difficult to
persuade her to allow you to do this, the next time.

Farting.

Horse farts are just lovely. A horse farts on the average once every five to
ten minutes, depending mostly on the horse's diet and its motions. Eating green
grass leads to a higher degree of fermentation in the guts and to a higher
production of methane gas, among other things. Usually a horse fart is
recognized by a short quick rise of the tail, half way up. The rise of the tail
differs from that of defecation, in that the lifting is much quicker. While the
tail is up, a soft hiss can be heard. Apart from humans, horses (equines) are
among the very few kinds of animal that also can fart loudly. That is mainly
because of a large production of gas that is characteristic of the horse's
digestive system, but also of the magnificent, muscular, sphincter. Bulls have
been heard to fart loudly as well. So, when the pressure is higher, the tail
will rise somewhat higher and a series of loud farts are given off. This is
even more conspicuous when the horse is walking or trotting, for instance, in a
parade. This also gives rise to interesting commentaries by bystanders.

The smell of the horse fart is sharp, some say spicy, but clear and has a
pleasant aroma. The farts can also be collected in the same kind of plastic
bags as used for horse shit, provided they are airtight. From this you can take
deep breaths and really feel the aroma.

It is also possible to feel the fart physically by placing your ear against the
big soft anus. You will then feel how the tail lifts, how the anus swells
softly against your ear and then, maybe, a loud fart will blow right into your
ear. You may as well push your nose straight into the hole and wait for the
hot, strong, gas to flush into your nose. These things are best experienced
when the horse is lying down.

It has also been proposed that you could improve the farting by gently blowing
air into the rectum by a small rubber hose.

Cattle.

For the horseless horseshit lover it can be really difficult to find a horse to
be alone with sufficient privacy. If you are eager to play with fresh manure,
the second best source for that is cattle. They are generally more abundant and
are not so closely guarded as horses since they often are personal pets of the
owner. On the other hand, cattle are usually located in broad, open pastures
with no places to hide.

The poop and pee from cattle is also a pure grass product and can in principle
be enjoyed in the same way as that of the horses. But there are also large
differences, mainly concerning the poop.

As everybody knows, the cow shit is much sloppier and can vary from almost
liquid to a thick dough that barely flattens out when falling to the ground.

Most of what has been said about horse poop and pee and the ways to experience
the various pleasures it can offer, can also be applied on cow shit. So
therefore here will only the more important differences be described.

General.

The digestive system of cattle is more complicated than that of the horses but
also more efficient. Cattle are ruminants, which means that they have four
stomachs and chew the food twice. Thereby the fermenting process is quite
different and the nutrients are better extracted from the grass or hay. A
different fermenting process also means that the flora of microorganisms in the
feces is different from that of the horses. Cow shit is sort of "depleted" of
nutrients, while horse shit still contain a fairly large amount. This
difference is best illustrated by the fact that a large heap of cow manure
remains cold, while a heap of horse manure is warm and can grow real hot. That
is because the microorganisms continue to work long after the manure has cooled
down. It however requires that the heap is large enough ("critical mass"), or
otherwise isolated, so it doesn't loose heat faster than the microorganisms
produce it.

A cow eats more grass or hay, and much more water, than a horse and therefore
produces around the double amount of shit every day. That is mainly due to the
larger content of water in the shit. So a normal cow will produce some 30 to 40
kilograms of manure each day. Also the amount of urine is considerably larger
than the horse produces.

For the cow, as is the case with horses, the meaning of life is eating. So all
days are spent eating and resting. The resting is lying down and ruminating for
an hour or two, every two hours or so.

Normally, when the cow has finished ruminating, the rectum is filled. It then
rises and within just a few minutes the tail lifts slowly. The big but
inconspicuous anus that lies rather deep under the base of the tail, opens up
and the golden brown cow shit emerges as a more or less featureless, almost
liquid, paste that glides down over the cow's vulva and breaks into pieces and
falls to the ground or floor with a strong plopping sound. The result is
usually a large pie that can be big as a pizza but maybe two inches thick and
can weigh six to eight pounds or three to five kilograms. The smell of fresh
cow poop would generally be regarded as less attractive than the horse shit
aroma.

Watching cattle poop and pee is more or less limited to pastures and barns. Due
to their relatively large number it is quite easy to see anyone defecate or
urinate.

Playing with cow shit.

If you want to physically play with cow shit there are a few cautions, apart
from what has been said in connection with horses:

* Cows are less discriminate with what they eat, and the different digestive
system, among other things, leads to that their shit is more likely to contain
bacteria or virus that can be harmful to humans. Sometimes even lethal. It is
therefore of highest importance that you know how well the cows are treated and
fed. The recent problems with mad cow disease and foot and mouth disease in
Europe illustrates that.

* Being around, or under, the rear end of a cow is less dangerous, as compared
to horses, but most cattle have long sharp horns, that can be a real danger if
you have to mingle with a lot of cows in a pasture. A simple pleasure is to
walk in chilly grass with naked feet and then stand in a very fresh, hot cow
pat. Another is just catching the shit in the hands and feel the warmth and the
great mass of it. Or else you can try to sit or lie down on a fresh cow pie.

To get pooped on by a big well fed cow is a mighty experience. Of course it is
easiest if you have the possibility to be alone with a cow in a barn, where the
cow can't move around. If you are in a pasture it is more difficult. If you sit
or lie down under the tail it is no problem until the cow starts to lift its
tail. If it is aware of your presence under the tail, it will take a couple of
steps forward, because it has an instinct not to let the shit fall on somebody.
The reason for that is that calves frequently suck the cow from behind, between
the hind legs. So, it would be inappropriate to shit on your offspring. To
overcome this problem, you can either groom the hind legs intensely or place
some interesting object in front of the cow, so its attention is diverted from
the act of pooping.

Since cattle have less control over the shitting and pissing acts, there are
ways to stimulate defecation, and make it happen earlier. That you can do by
pushing the index finger into the anus and press rhythmically with the fist.
Usually you can feel the shit inside and how the sphincter loosens up.

If you wish to let the shit fall onto your face, it is a good advice to plug
your nostrils with cotton, or otherwise your nasal cavity may be completely
filled cow shit. It can also be very exciting to place your mouth directly
against the anus and let the shit be pressed into the mouth. In general, when
messing with cow shit, you should be careful that cow is not conspicuously
smeared on the rump in order that the cows owner does not get suspicious.

If you have smeared yourself with cowshit, it is useful to wait a little until
it is time for pissing, which usually is a short time after shitting. You can
here also stimulate an earlier pissing by forcefully massaging the lower part
of the vulva. This makes the tail lift and it often leads to that the cow lets
loose the flood.

A cow can produce large amounts of urine, and in contrast to horses, it is not
sensitive to getting wet, and furthermore, the cow can't stop once it started.
So, the situation is ideal for taking a long hot shower under the tail. It is
quite useful for a coarse cleaning of yourself before cleaning with soap and
water.

Double pleasures.

In principle everything that has been described here is possible to enjoy on
your own. However, doing these things together with someone who shares the same
interests increases the intensity of the experiences immensely. Particularly,
the more advanced plays with the shit are much easier to perform and add a lot
the safety in all respects. Also there are much better opportunities to take
interesting photos of various activities. And as usual, shared pleasures are
double pleasures.

Removing traces.

Finally, don't forget to wipe out all traces of your doings, either in the
pasture or at home.

Here is a short checklist:

* When leaving the animal, check for unusual smearings or stains.

* Make sure you have not left anything in the pasture, stable, or where you
have been.

* Check your clothes, towels and washing gears for stains,

* Wash yourself thoroughly, including hair, ears and other difficult spots.
Independently of how careful you are, when drying with a towel afterwards, it
will almost certainly be colored brownish, so use a disposable towel.

* Clean the bathtub or shower booth and especially check the outlet.

* Make sure to get rid of the shit and the plastic bags. It will take some five
to ten flushings to dispose of a full load of horse poop in the toilet.

* Clean or throw away towels and clothes if you have to.

This story is part of White_Shadow's_Nasty_Stories.
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