Storiesonline.net ------- Last Straw by Shrink42 Copyright© 2005 by Shrink42 ------- Description: Opposites attract. Love conquers all. Nobody's perfect. People change. Forgive and forget. You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone. Pride goes before a fall. Which cliche will be your salvation, and which will ruin your life? Two families stumble over, crash into, or cling desperately to most of them. Codes: MF rom 1st teen cons ------- ------- Chapter 1 He hated to leave her like this. She certainly was not in any shape to go home, but there really was not any choice. It was early Saturday evening, and the swimming coach from his top choice school was coming for supper. It would not have been right for Julie to be there, and they both knew it. This was something special for his family. In her present state, it would only have made her feel worse, anyway. Glen Voss and his girlfriend, Julie Menconi, were seniors and the swimming season had just ended. He had had a terrific year, finishing tops in the state in three events, and it looked like he could choose his college. The scholarship was critical for Glen because his parents could not afford to send him, otherwise. Oh, they would have hocked everything they had and would have taken on extra jobs so he could go, but he could never have lived with that. He had a younger sister and brother who needed their chance, too. Glen's family was reserved, and might mistakenly have been described as phlegmatic. That impression was strictly from external appearances, however. In reality, there was no lack of emotion, most of it positive. There was a lot of love between all the family members, expressed mostly as simple courtesy and consideration, and unquestioning support. There was a strong achievement orientation, but little parental pressure. Glen's mother, Betty, had been a competitive swimmer, and he inherited his physique and his burning desire to win from her. No one seeing his family cheering for him or his younger sister at a meet would ever think them phlegmatic. Glen's father, Alan, had a good job as a production superintendent. However, a few long layoffs and some health emergencies had thrown the family into a debt situation with almost no savings. It was not something they agonized over, but they all knew that the children would have to pay most of their own way through college. From his father, Glen inherited steadfastness and absolute devotion to his family above everything else. His father had been the first ever in his family to attend college, and passed on his view of education as the ultimate prize to be sought by a young person. Besides the need for a scholarship to gain his education, Glen lived for the chance to compete at the next level. Swimming was his passion, his dream. World Championships, Pan Am Games, and Olympics were the stuff of his dreams - in addition to Julie, that is. The coach coming for supper was from his absolute top choice, a school that produced more international competitors than any other. Glen's career objective was to teach, with an ultimate goal of coaching at the college level. Julie was not happy with his career aspirations, but she kept very quiet on that point. She was used to a lot more than a teacher's salary could provide. She knew Glen was capable of much more, and it was her loving duty to steer him in more lucrative directions. That was was a challenge for the future, however. For the present, she was consumed by the awful prospect of being separated from him for four years of college. To describe Julie and Glen as boyfriend and girlfriend seemed a woeful understatement. They became a couple early in their Junior year. Julie was the cheerleading goddess, with the brains and the personality to match. She had classic dark Mediterranean beauty with a figure that promised to emerge as voluptuous as she matured further. Glen was the hunk swimming star. He had the long, smooth, tapered musculature of top swimmers and a handsome face. He was smart, well-spoken, courteous to a fault, and very attentive to his dates. In the informal rating system among the girls, Glen was the top-rated date, even ahead of the football stars. Julie had wanted him, and had all the right stuff to get him. Besides her beauty, Julie radiated a genuine sexuality - genuine in that she did not use it for teasing, but really enjoyed and wanted everything to do with sex. She was by no means a slut, and she and Glen were each other's first on Prom night of their Junior year. After that, every chance they had to make love was intense and satisfying. Julie did not use sex as a device to trap him, either. By the time they consummated, she was deeply in love with him. Despite some areas of discomfort, Glen loved her, too. Wherever they were, he could not keep his eyes off of her. It was not just her body and face, either. Her poise, her gestures, her presence - everything about her had him feeling fortunate to hold her affection. She was open in expressing her adoration of him, and that kind of ego stroking was hard for any young man to resist. ------- Stories of Prom night deflorations are plentiful. Many of them focus on the machinations and chicanery involved in enabling the couples to get together. Not so with Glen and Julie. Glen had insisted on both sets of parents being fully aware of their intentions. In the case of Julie's parents, approval was too much to ask for, but she had informed them in February that she was giving him her virginity on Prom night. She gave them the choice of getting her on birth control or becoming grandparents. What ensued was an epic among numerous unbelievable family battles. She got the pills. When Glen picked Julie up in the limo, she met him at the door, with no sign of her parents. His heart was already nearly ruptured at the sight of her beauty. When he saw the tears of frustration in her eyes, it was almost more than he could take. The limo ride was solemn, but they did not go straight to the Prom. Glen had anticipated her parents' reaction, and a traditional pre-Prom photo session was already set up at his house. After all the pictures and the adoration of Glen's younger siblings, Betty pulled Julie aside and told her "I'm sure my son is going to make you a very happy woman tonight. He loves you very much." "He has already made me very happy, Betty. And so have you and the rest of the family. You've taken away a lot of the hurt." Julie's eyes teared up as she said it. "Hey, you should forget all the bad stuff for the rest of the night." Betty gave the girl a hug as she said it, being careful not to mess up the dress which they had bought for her. Julie managed to put the bad out of her mind very well. She and Glen danced every dance together. None of the boys dared to try cutting in on Glen, and he had eyes only for Julie, despite the small horde of girls dying for just one dance with him. They were both excited about the upcoming event, but they did not let it dominate their thinking or diminish the sheer fun of the Prom. They were among the last to leave the dance floor, seemingly in no hurry at all as they mingled with friends and thanked the chaperones. Alone in the elevator to their room, they quickly dropped the cool act and embraced frantically. Julie was so worked up, Glen was afraid she would pull his pants off right there. In her hurry to get them to the room, she was pulling on him so hard she turned her ankle. It was not a disabling injury, but enough to distract her from her eagerness to get into bed, at least momentarily. Once in the room, Glen sat her on the bed, took off her shoe, and gently rubbed her wounded ankle. Seeing a chance to extend his ministrations into a sexy interlude, he started working his way up her leg with his strokes, then switched over to give the other leg equal time. Julie had laid back on the bed, just enjoying his attention, and did not immediately catch on to his intentions. Once Julie realized what Glen was doing, her first reaction was to object, but she stayed still, intrigued by the thought of him undressing her. When he reached her crotch and took hold of the top of her panty hose, she decided he had a great idea. When he very slowly worked the hose off, caressing every new inch of exposed leg, she gave in to eager anticipation. With the panty hose out of the way, Glen took several minutes working his way back up her bare legs. Eager as he was for their first intercourse, he could never get enough of the feel of her fabulous legs. Her thighs were firm, but with a luxurious layer of flesh covering them. Her skin seemed to have its own special silk-like coating. He thought his hands had never been treated to anything as wonderful. Throughout all their dating, Glen had seemed to understand instinctively how much she loved to be caressed. Even when they were just talking, he almost always had his hands on her. His obvious fascination with her legs had caused her to weight her apparel heavily toward skirts or shorts. As he pulled Julie's frilly panties down, Glen made sure there was lots of 'accidental' contact with her pussy lips and a few brushes against her clit, which was already wide awake. He was planning on indulging his newfound love for cunnilingus, and Julie read his thoughts. She reluctantly sat up and told him "Sweetie, I want you to kiss me everywhere, but I want to be clean and fresh for you. How about you finish undressing me, then I'll undress you. Then we can take a shower together. Sound OK?" Glen rarely objected to any of Julie's suggestions, and there was certainly nothing wrong with this one. In the shower, Julie worked on her developing blow job technique, telling him it would help him last longer when they got to the main event. Mention of the main event brought increased urgency to the couple, and they finished the shower and dried off quickly. Back on the bed, Glen prepared to go down on her, but her anticipation of penetration had become unbearable, and she insisted he enter her immediately. In his calm, gentle way that sometimes infuriated her, he explained that he had come once and he would not deny her equal pleasure. Her reminded her that women did not usually come just from intercourse, especially not the first time. As he spoke, he was already teasing her clit, and her planned objection was short-lived. It was doubtful Glen would ever become an expert pussy eater, for he had precious little chance to practice. Julie was blessed with an exceptionally sensitive clit, and it usually took only a couple of minutes of nibbling and tonguing it to send her into orbit. That night, the playful side of Glen was tempted to concentrate on things other than her clit to stretch out the experience for a while. He sensed her extreme eagerness, however, and had not the heart to disappoint her. Julie's gynecologist did not believe that the pain of a ruptured hymen was an essential, sacred part of a proper defloration. She had offered to cut it surgically and Julie had agreed. Glen knew of it and did not feel at all deprived by missing the chance to cause his lover pain. As a result, their first time was completely pleasurable for both of them. Contrary to his stated reason for eating her out, Julie did in fact come during their first coupling. Glen actually came first, but remained firm enough to stay within her until he again hardened fully. He lasted a long time before his third come of the evening, and after several minutes of energetic thrusting, she launched into what she professed was her greatest climax ever. It had not been easy for the couple to delay until the Prom, but their resolve was rewarded. The surroundings, the leisure of having all night, and even the extended wait made it everything they had hoped for. The antipathy of Julie's parents could have lessened their joy, but strangely, it had the opposite effect. The fact that she was doing it and they knew it was a victory for her. After sharing an experience beyond what they could have imagined, the couple covered themselves and fell asleep. Julie woke after about two hours and roused her lover. They shared a bath and returned to try two more positions before neither could handle any more. Rising rather late, they showered together again and planned to get breakfast at the hotel restaurant. Feeling a sense of loss as he watched Julie don her panties, Glen suggested they stay naked as long as they could and order room service. They both realized it could be a long time before they could again enjoy seeing each other that way. By prior arrangement, Alan picked them up right at the late checkout time. In the car, before Alan could shift into gear, Julie threw her arms around his neck from the back seat and kissed him all over the side of his face. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" she squealed, "for raising such a wonderful son for me to love!" Not relishing the kind of reception she would receive at home, Julie had planned to spend the rest of the day at the Voss home. Her greeting to Betty was similar to that for Alan. Although nothing had been said to the other children, fifteen-year-old Ellie knew exactly what had happened and gave Julie a warm hug. Despite their differences in age and appearance, the two girls were getting along famously. Glen wished he could thank the Menconi's for raising such a wonderful daughter, but he believed Julie was the wonderful girl she was in spite of their influence. ------- Glen's one big area of discomfort with his lover was the difference in their personalities, as reflected by the contrasts between their families. On his first visit to Julie's home, he could hardly wait to get out the door. It seemed that everything said and done by her parents he found embarrassing. They did not even try to hide arguments and disagreements, and appeared to be trying to embarrass Julie at every turn. He read the tumult as a lack of love, and he was appalled. Julie, perceptive as she was, saw the problem immediately, and hustled him out as quickly as she could. Only rarely during the rest of their dating did she let him into her house, and then only briefly. On her part, she at first found Glen's home dull, but learned to appreciate the genuine warmth and tenderness between his family members. She was the one who wanted him, at first, and being around his family while staying away from hers was a compromise she was willing to make. Over time, she actually found it comforting to be able to relax and let her guard down at his home, something she never really did at hers. With Julie's parents, it was survival of the fittest. They were so alike it was uncanny, and it was unbelievable that they stayed together. A psychologist could have written a paper on them, trying to determine if it was masochism, co-dependence, or simple lust that kept them a couple. They were both at the top of the physical attractiveness scale - think Gina Lolabrigida and Marcello Mastroianni. Their marriage was a continuing struggle to control the other, and that was the source of the constant skirmishes. It seemed that every activity or decision led to a battle for supremacy. Shouting, crying, thrown objects, wild accusations and exaggerations - these were standard weapons in the control struggle. Julie's father, Vince, exhibited his strong controlling nature in the manner most common to males - he strove to subdue and subjugate everything and everyone in his environment. As with many highly control-oriented people, he was an outstanding salesman, earning a substantial income for the family. Within the family, he tended to lay out rules and requirements or decide actions and directions. Deviations from his directives suffered the consequences. A strong tendency of a controlling woman is to micro-manage all those in her sphere of influence. She views the people in her sphere as extensions of herself. The objective is to 'make them do the right thing, ' with her being the only one to know for certain what that 'right thing' is. This is the woman who feesl free to discipline a stranger's children for misbehaving in public, for instance. Often, the child's only transgression is failing to meet her personal, obviously universally correct, standard of behavior. Julie's mother, Theresa, was a textbook example. Theresa had never held a job, nor had that been needed. She had a trust fund from a wealthy grandfather. By the conditions of the trust, it had to be covered by a pre-nuptial agreement excluding it from community property. The trust was not huge, but could have provided a living off of the interest, had she needed to rely on that. Being predominately a homemaker, and not one to mix with 'the girls' a lot. Theresa's approach to parenting did not incur the scrutiny it might have if she was more social. One line fortunately was never crossed in Julie's home: Vince never struck or otherwise manhandled Theresa or his children. In fact, in a perverse twist, the constant husband/wife fighting was a powerful aphrodisiac - foreplay of a weird sort. A source of huge embarrassment to Julie and her year-younger brother, Terry, was the way many fights ended. Just when the shouting and screaming were at their peak and the most horrible accusations were being hurled, the parents would retreat to the bedroom and sounds of unrestrained passion would replace the fighting. Of course, the need to control extended to the children. Julie was the oldest, and as a necessity of survival, she became at least as strong-willed and control-oriented as her parents. She became a fierce and accomplished fighter, perfecting all the family warfare techniques. Inheriting a hair-trigger, monstrous temper gave her a natural advantage. Terry could not cope, and was driven into drugs as an escape. By the Spring of Julie's Senior year, he was serving a sentence in a rehab/detention facility. The parents never could understand how such a tragedy could happen to them. Vince and Theresa were not slovenly or neglectful parents. They had a beautiful home that was immaculately kept. Neither were they uninvolved or overly restrictive on their children's activities. What they were was constantly looking over shoulders and meddling in the smallest details, especially Theresa. It seemed as though they were trying to provoke reaction. With Julie, they very often succeeded, and the battles, usually starting over trivia, were things of legend. Julie, of course, could not wear off her aggression with sex, as Vince and Theresa so often did. It festered within her and drove her to ever fiercer and more outrageous battle tactics. In elementary school, Julie's aggressive, domineering behavior toward her classmates, coupled with her volcanic temper, led to much discipline and many parent conferences. She was just doing what she had learned to do to survive, and it took years before she understood that what happened at her house was not the norm. She was perceptive and intelligent enough to adapt to the social expectations. Except for the very few friends that visited her home, by junior high none of her acquaintances suspected the volatile, brawling side of her nature. In grade school, Julie established some life-long friendships with other girls. With one in particular, Candy, she became closer than most sisters. In a pattern that would be repeated later with Glen, Julie spent huge amounts of time at Candy's house, but Candy seldom visited hers. Candy's family, comprising parents and four children, was a critical education for Julie. They were energetic, raucous, and hilarious, with the parents taking no backseat to the kids in any of it. In total contrast to the almost sterile tidiness of the Menconi home, Candy's place was always in a state of comfortable disorder. All of Candy's family was unashamedly demonstrative about their affection for each other. It was normal to see two or three kids plastered all over one parent or the other while watching TV. A pivotal point in Julie's social education occurred during sixth grade. She was once again watching TV with Candy's family, sitting on the floor alone while two of the kids book-ended each parent. "Hey, Julie, I've reserved a spot for a beautiful young lady right here on my lap," Candy's father told her, "and you're the perfect one to fill it." After some uncertainty, Julie plopped in his lap, and from that day on, she began to act more like one of the family in terms of cuddling and showing affection. Julie's own parents were by no means cold or undemonstrative to her, and expressions of affection from them were not at all unusual. The older she got, however, the more they seemed like opponents because of the constant control struggles and frequent pitched battles. The older she got, the harder it was to reconcile the fighting and the cuddling. Another characteristic of Candy's family that Julie took careful note of was the way discipline and disagreements were handled - always in private. Though boisterous, the kids were well-behaved. If one had to be corrected or scolded, they were always taken to a different room, and the encounters could never be heard by the others. At first, this style was foreign and mystifying to Julie, but it did not take long for her to decide that was the right way for families to live together, and her house was the weird one. As might be expected with a large, boisterous family in a rather small house, modesty was not a top priority. The first time Julie stayed overnight at Candy's, she was totally shocked when the family assembled for breakfast. Candy's dad wore just pajamas, and both her older and younger brothers had on only jockey shorts. Her mother had on a short, sleeveless nightie that was barely opaque. Candy sensed her friend's discomfort, and because of her natural playful, teasing nature, had to take advantage of it. The next time Julie stayed over, the girls were showering before bed. After showering first, Candy snuck into the bathroom and took all of Julie's clothes. Waiting outside the bathroom, she let Julie get into a full panic. Then, she went and got her Dad and asked him to wait in the hall. Next, she dropped her own clothes and dragged Julie naked back to her bedroom. The father, of course, got a full view of the the two, and Julie was absolutely mortified. Out of the prank came a touching encounter that further convinced Julie of what she was missing at home. Candy's Dad came into the bedroom after he was sure the girls were in bed. He first gently scolded Candy for embarrassing her friend, afterwards telling her how beautiful she was. Then, he sat beside Julie and talked to her. He told her how beautiful she was, and how privileged he felt to have seen her like that. He told her it was not a good habit to let people see her naked, but if it happened, she should not worry too much. He gave her a kiss on the forehead, and Julie reacted very emotionally by practically breaking his neck with a hug. For her own part, Julie was very welcome at any of her friends' homes, at least by the time she reached her teens. Her parents were very much into respect, decorum, and manners. In fact, much of Theresa's micro-managing of her daughter dealt with proper behavior. It may have led to much anger and fighting, but Julie did accept the training and lived by it. Until the current conflict over college, and the earlier one over her virginity, Julie was not rebellious or hateful toward her parents, except in a battle. Just like them, she had the strange ability to come out of a fierce fight and resume normal relationships very quickly. Because of her wide social contacts, and particularly since going with Glen, she became very aware of how strange her parents were. She determined that she would not be like them, and she grew anxious to get away from them. Julie's announcement that she would be having sex with Glen at her Junior Prom triggered one of the all-time great Menconi battles. Terry was still living at home during the week-long epic. Counselors later affirmed that it was instrumental in pushing him into drug abuse. Julie loved her brother, a strikingly handsome, gentle boy who did not have a chance in that tumultuous household. For many years, she had tried to run interference for him in any way she could, but Prom night was an issue she was right in the middle of. Even as a bystander, his sensitive spirit was completely overloaded. His descent into drug abuse was a huge damper on the joy of her newfound union with Glen Despite her growing disgust over her parents' raging battles, Julie was determined not to lose that one, and she used everything she had learned. Her outstanding advantage was that Theresa first had sex when she was fifteen, in a time that was far less permissive. This fact Julie had learned from her maternal grandmother. Nothing they could bring up could get around that damning fact, and Julie ultimately won. In the end, it may have been a pyrrhic victory, motivating them to even the score with a big victory of their own on the college issue. Naturally, Julie's parents had college all planned out for her. They had met while attending a small, Catholic liberal arts college, and that was where Julie was going, period. They had the money to send her there, and despite many screaming sessions, they would not consider anywhere else. College choice turned out to be the pivotal factor in Glen and Julie's lives. Julie's parents' college had no intercollegiate sports, and even if the cost had not been prohibitive, there was zero chance Glen would attend there. Being together at college can be the most idyllic of settings for young lovers. The combination of freedom, structure, obligation, and sexuality provide a unique interlude that cannot be duplicated at any other time in a person's life. Many a relationship has been started, destroyed, or cemented for life in that special world called college. Both Julie and Glen instinctively sensed the appeal of going to school together. Both wanted it with all their hearts. Knowing they could not be together at school had become a huge dark cloud over the couple. Glen very briefly wondered if the scholarship was worth being away from his soul mate. His passion and his competitive nature, however, would not allow the possibility of turning down the scholarship - besides the swimming, it was his only real chance at college. His heart ached at the thought of the separation, but he viewed it as another obstacle to be overcome, rather than as a disaster. He cursed Julie's parents for what he considered their meanness in forcing the separation upon them. To Julie, being away from her lover for most of four years was absolutely a disaster. Her passionate nature and her wholehearted love for Glen were too much for even her intelligence and general level-headedness. All she could see was her world ending when he went off to school. Besides being her all-consuming love, Glen was her escape, as well. More and more as graduation approached, she viewed her home as a hell, and Glen as her only salvation. Home was pressure, turmoil, and constant strife. Glen and his family were unconditional love and acceptance. In her mind, she was losing her lover and her chance for escape, and it had pushed her to the teetering edge of rationality. ------- As Glen pulled up to Julie's house that Saturday night, his heart ached for her. He wanted to take her to bed and just hold her. He wanted to make everything all right for her. She had tearfully told him all about the horrendous fight that had caused her to call him for rescue. Knowing that the coach was coming that night, and that Glen would probably get the scholarship he so coveted, Julie had gone to her parents in a last ditch attempt to change their minds about college. She had come tearfully and sincerely, not angrily, and had carefully contained her emotions for over a half hour. Not expecting much, she would have retreated quietly and accepted her defeat, if her parents had left it at that. Instead, they had to force her to 'understand' and admit that she was wrong in not wanting to go their school. Despite her strong determination, Julie's anger management had definite limitations, and she had lost it completely. Amid all the screaming, she had declared that she would never set foot on that campus, and that she was moving out the day after graduation. Although she had yelled, accused, and insulted in her accustomed manner, Julie was sick at heart as she had never been before. Perhaps triggered by the extreme despair and hopelessness, after about ten minutes of combat, she had had the sudden feeling that she was another person standing and watching herself. What she saw had sickened and amazed her, and for the first time, she had quit fighting. It had taken her parents another ten minutes to realize that she was not returning fire, and it was not until she had left to call Glen that they stopped their own attacks. Then, they had stopped shouting and had tried to verify that she agreed with them. She repeatedly swallowed her anger and despair and over and over again calmly reiterated her threats. Theresa and Vince had not known how to deal with their daughter's forced calm demeanor. They knew just how to react to her skillful fighting tactics - it was an established part of family lore. They had actually calmed down and tried to be comforting and encouraging to her. It was as if they did not even hear her repeated declarations that she would never attend their school and would move out when school was over. After about a dozen repetitions by Julie, it had sunk in that they had not convinced her, despite her refusal to fight. This had left them nonplussed, and their natural reaction had been to return to battle mode. It had been two yelling at one until Glen had arrived to give her a brief escape. Glen was always able to soothe Julie. When he had to drop her off, she had calmed down and her anger had diffused. Her fear and despair over the impending separation was just as strong, though, as was her determination to carry out her threats from earlier. For the first time she could remember, she felt an icy calm as she opened the front door. Julie was not even inside the house when she heard the familiar sounds of combat. Through all the screeching and yelling, she was astonished to hear that the battleground was her. Even more astonishing was that their positions on her seemed to shift from person to person as they fought. Carefully, she crept to where she could see them in the family room. All the moves and many of the words seemed eerily familiar, as if she were witnessing some insane ritual. Any hope that this fight might ease her plight was quickly dashed. The battle appeared to be over who was most responsible for putting her in her place and making her do the right thing. It was also over whether or not there was anything to fear from her earlier threats. With eerie detachment, Julie wondered if the fight had been going on ever since she left the house in tears earlier. She began to anticipate the next attack by each of them, and she was amazingly accurate. This time, she really listened to the incredible insults that they threw at each other, wondering how they could even exist in the same house after the things that were said. It took a moment to realize they were the same kinds of things that were said all the time, and the kinds of things she herself had said in their earlier fight. She almost became ill with the realization of what she had become. If Julie was sickened by her new perception of her family's perversion, even worse was waiting for her. Theresa ended a long tirade by screaming "How the Hell did I end of with such a limp-dicked bastard for a husband?" "Limp-dicked? Limp-dicked?" Vince shouted back. "You call this limp-dicked?" To Julie's complete shock, Vince pushed down his jeans and underwear to display his sizable cock. "You never complain about it being limp when I ram it into your fat ass!" He stepped out of his shoes and wriggled out of his puddled garments to stand naked from the waist down, unknowingly giving his daughter a profile of his now-rampant erection. Many young people find the thought of their parents having sex disturbing or even disgusting. Julie had long been used to the fact the her parents fucked often and noisily, so she felt no revulsion. Neither did she feel any stimulation, only curiosity and more than a little shock. She had absolutely no inclination to leave or to reveal herself and stop the display. Apparently, Theresa's insult and Vince's exposure were well-recognized triggers to an impending sexual bout. Theresa stared at Vince's cock for a moment, motionless, and with hands on hips, before shouting back "Fat ass? You mean this?" She then shed her own lower garments, quickly ending up in the same state of dress as her husband, then turning to thrust her luscious ass toward him as she slapped it resoundingly. "I never hear any complaints when you're eating it out or fucking it. Why don't you come over here and show me what's wrong with my fat ass!" With that, she walked into the kitchen and bent over the kitchen table and waved her ass back and forth. Her legs were spread, giving both her husband and daughter a clear view of her labia, which were quite obviously already engorged. Leaving their clothes piled in the family room, Vince followed his wife, cock waving in front of him with each step. As he reached her, he suddenly stopped. "Oh, no! What if Julie comes home?" "Fuck Julie!" Theresa spat out, "just gimme that cock!" After a moment, she said "Yeah, fuck Julie - that's a great idea." Both were motionless for another moment, then she started imitating a little girl's voice. "Come on, Daddy. Fuck my tight little ass. Stick that big hard cock in my tight little virgin teenaged pussy. Take my cherry, Daddy. Make me a woman!" "Oh, Baby! Daddy's going to give your tight little pussy a lovin' it'll never forget!" Vince sang out. "I'm gonna slap your pretty little ass and make it so nice and red!" Giving action to his words, he delivered several sharps slaps. "Oooh, Daddy, you're making so hot!" Theresa cooed as she squirmed under his blows. "Get it in me! Get it in me!" Vince did just that, sinking all the way into his pretend daughter in one strong thrust. He slapped her a few more times as he started a rhythm, then took his thumb and began working it into her anus. They were both very vocal as their arousal increased, and both stayed in character, pretending she was Julie. For several minutes he kept on thrusting, impressing Julie with his stamina. With the coordination of long practice, Theresa exploded noisily, causing him to reach his own release with a bellow of triumph. Julie had no way of knowing that this was completely new territory for her mother and father. Never before had they indulged in a fantasy involving their daughter. As she watched, Julie almost unconsciously removed her own Jeans and panties. She didn't touch herself, as she was strangely unaroused. She just watched as her rutting parents played out their roles and reached a sweaty, noisy completion. Timing it perfectly as her father's cock just slipped out of her mother, Julie stepped forward until she was about eight feet away from them. She was between them and their clothes and any possible concealment when she spoke up. "Is this where you really wanted to put your cock, Daddy?" As both parents spun around in shock, faces devoid of color, she thrust her pelvis forward and used both hands to spread herself open to them. Then, she turned around and bent over, feet apart and cheeks spread with her hands. "Is this where you have to pretend to put it so you can get it up, Daddy?" With that, she turned back to face them. "J... J... Julie, I... I would never... !" Vince stammered. "Damn right, you'd never!" Julie spat back. "Glen takes wonderful care of my 'tight little teenaged pussy, ' thank you! And I don't have to have a god-damned fight with him to get him in the mood, either!" She turned and walked away. When she reached her jeans and panties, she did an exaggerated bend from the waist to pick them up. Turning back toward her still motionless parents one more time, she said "Besides, what would be the point of fucking me again? The two of you thoroughly fucked me over this afternoon." She then hurried off to her room. Once in her room, Julie locked the door, then collapsed onto her bed, shaking like a leaf. She could not believe what she had seen, and even more, she could not believe what she had done. As far as she knew, her father had never seen her naked, and vice versa. Only rarely had she and her mother seen each other. She thought she should feel some shame, but could not generate any. Not knowing exactly why she did it, Julie took off the rest of her clothes, then unlocked and opened the door wide. She didn't have any other weapons left, and shock seemed to be quite effective. She was certain they would be storming her room eventually, and she would really shock them. She lay back against the headboard and spread her legs, hands behind her head. She shivered a little, both from the chill of the air and from the lewdness of her position. She forced her pulse to slow as she settled in to wait for them to appear. Somehow, she felt no embarrassment or fear of exposure. If they saw every inch of her, so what. There was nothing left for her to hide or protect, anyway. All her choices were gone. Glen would take the scholarship, and he would be gone, too. At that moment, it was almost as if self did not exist for her. When Julie left the kitchen, Theresa and Vince were left sweating, dripping sex fluids, and nearly boneless with shock and embarrassment. At the first sight of Julie, Vince's cock had shrunk as if under a cold faucet. Even her taunting display of her genitals had not budged it from its shrunken state. Their sexual bouts and role playing had always been private and harmless, as far as they were concerned, but they suddenly felt dirty and ashamed. They had never viewed their fighting or their sexual activity as immoral in any way, but with the intrusion of their daughter, that all changed. They were Catholics, contributing regularly and attending faithfully. As far as friends and associates knew, they were very moral people. One little bit of careless play, and everything was turned upside down. Neither had a clue how to get out of this situation. After a minute of stunned silence, both walked over to their clothes and put them on. Theresa muttered that she would go and talk to Julie. It was sooner than Julie expected when Theresa walked toward the door to her room. Julie dispassionately watched her mother compose herself, then jump back in shock when she saw her daughter spread-eagled before her. Julie spoke up immediately. "Where's Dad?' "D... downstairs, why?" "If you want to talk, both of you come up here, naked. Otherwise, we've had our last conversation." "But, Honey, I need to apologize for..." "No! No talking! I told you the rules. Now get out!" With that, Julie got to her feet and walked toward her mother. She somehow looked so strange and menacing that Theresa backed out of the room, whereupon Julie shut and locked the door behind her. Theresa was too embarrassed to even tell her husband Julie's condition for conversation. When Vince asked, Theresa just said Julie wouldn't let her in. Unwilling to leave it at that, he hurried to his daughter's room and pounded on the door. "Julie, we need to talk." "Fine! Both of you come up here naked, and I'll talk. Otherwise, forget it." Vince somehow knew this was not something he could talk her out of. He also knew he would not comply with her demand. Being naked with his daughter would be wrong. If that was the only reason, his refusal would have been admirable. The main reason, though, was that Julie had tried to dictate conditions - she had thrown out a challenge. Regardless of how shaken he was by the recent encounter, the challenge put Vince back into control mode. Knowing for certain there would be no conversation, Julie crawled into bed, even though it was still early evening. The emotional exhaustion and the sense of emptiness combined to pull her into a long, deep, dreamless sleep. ------- Julie awoke at first light, and was at first puzzled to find herself naked in bed, not at all her habit. Slowly, the events of the night before and the combination of despair, anger, and emptiness filled her again. To add even more upset to her emotional state, she awoke with a small stain of blood under her crotch, indicating the onset of her period. Very slowly, Julie showered and did her hair. She was rummaging in her drawer for underwear when the idea struck her: 'why dress?' Her parents had used her as a sex object in their sex games. Why not just be one? It wouldn't bother her at all, the way she felt. With a little private grin, the first sign of levity in a long time, she walked naked to the front door. After checking about quickly, she took two quick steps onto the cold concrete stoop and retrieved the Sunday paper. Vince came down the stairs and turned through the arch into the kitchen. He stopped dead in his tracks at the side view of Julie sitting naked, reading the paper and sipping coffee. Muttering an oath under his breath, he turned and went back up the stairs, badly shaken. As soon as she could get herself together, Theresa made her try. "Julie, Honey. Please! We have to..." "Are you both here naked? No? Then, no conversation. Feel free to use the kitchen." "But, aren't you going to Mass?" Theresa said this with a very uncharacteristic pleading whine in her voice. Julie exploded. "Are you kidding? All these years of Mass, and look where it got us! I have been to my last one, ever!" Reverting back to her previous silence, she totally ignored several more of Theresa's attempts to engage her. Neither parent was willing to use the kitchen with their daughter sitting there naked, so they went off to Mass without breakfast. Theresa's eyes were moist, but Vince's jaw was set in defiance. ------- This should have been one of the most joyful occasions of his life, but Glen found himself dreading it, instead. It was Sunday noon, and he was picking Julie up for lunch to celebrate the scholarship offer he had received the night before after dinner with the coach. He knew it meant he and Julie would be apart for most of the next four years, but what else could he do? Skipping college and getting a job was not an option. Even Julie agreed with that. Her parents' little college was far too expensive, and had no swimming team. He could go to the local university extension, but they didn't have swimming, either. Much as he believed Julie loved him deeply, it troubled Glen that she could not understand how important his dream was to him. He did not really blame her, though. He blamed her parents. Why they would not send her to the same school as him, he could not understand. They must want to break him and Julie apart. It was the only explanation that fit. Julie was silent and seemed distressingly distant as they walked to the car. Glen, of course, had no way of knowing about the disastrous encounter with her parents after he left her off the night before. Nor did he keep close enough track to know about her period. Once in the car, before he had a chance to start it, Julie asked "Did you get it?" At his silent nod, her world came apart. For years, Julie had stifled her anger when away from home, and made sure none of her friends and acquaintances, especially Glen, ever knew about the towering rage she was capable of. That day, she had no emotional resources left to control herself, and all the pent up anger was released at her beloved Glen. It took only seconds, and she was into a rage, hardly aware of what she was saying or doing. All she knew was that he was going away from her, and he was doing it on purpose. Her family was already gone, as far as she was concerned. Now Glen would be gone, too, and there was nothing left. Glen sat in stunned shock as his beloved Julie, the light of his life, was transformed into a raging monster right before his eyes. As she started to yell louder and louder, his stomach tightened and his pulse accelerated. Then she began the pattern learned so well in hundreds of family battles over the years. She said any hurtful, cutting thing that came to mind. There was no filter for truth, she only wanted it to hurt. Her parents were hardened against her assaults, and she always had to strive for new, more venomous verbal shots. In truth, when she was in the full grip of her anger, her mouth and part of her brain worked in concert to generate invective, but her memory and her rational centers were out of the loop. She honestly could not remember much of what she said at the height of her fits. Unlike her parents, Glen was not hardened to Julie's verbal attacks. No one had ever spoken to him like that. Every unconsidered, reflexive verbal thrust cut him like a real knife. He absorbed each blow as if she meant it, and the impact was almost physical. By the time Julie jumped from the car, slammed the door, and stomped up the walk to the house, Glen was paralyzed and nauseous. Julie stormed into the house and dashed into her room, slamming doors and banging purposely into walls. For a couple of minutes, she darted about her room as if possessed, unable to stand in one place, but with nowhere to go. Anger seemed to shoot from her like static electricity, and she emitted small, throaty growls of frustration. With surprising suddenness, Julie's anger ran out, and an inkling of what she had just done began to permeate her consciousness. Her room was on the front of the house and she lunged to the window and looked out. She saw Glen on his knees on the curb, throwing up. As he straightened and started to stand, she hurtled down the stairs in blind panic. As she blasted through the front door, Glen's car began to move off. Waving her arms and yelling his name, she ran after the car as fast as she could, but it was soon out of sight. Sobbing hysterically and gasping for breath, Julie collapsed on the grass of a neighbor's yard. She would never be able to recall how she got back to the house and up to her room. Theresa, seeing her daughter's zombie-like state, tried to find out what was wrong, but Julie never acknowledged her presence. Last Straw ------- Chapter 2 Julie's next conscious recollection was either waking or regaining consciousness on the floor of her room, with her mother pounding on her locked door and yelling her name. After a few seconds of total confusion, she remembered, and felt her stomach start to churn. Staggering into the bathroom that opened to her room, her brother's room, and the upstairs hall, she barely made it to the toilet before emptying her stomach. As she moaned in anguish afterward, she heard her mother trying the two other doors to the bathroom, both of which Julie always kept locked. ------- Theresa was not without motherly instincts, and right then they were as elevated as at any time she could remember. She had barely slept the night before, horrified at what had happened in the kitchen. The fight over college the previous afternoon had left her disturbed as well. Vince had scoffed at Julie's threat to refuse to attend their college, or to flunk out if forced to attend. At this point, Theresa was inclined to believe her daughter was serious. During that fight, she had sensed an element of desperation in Julie that had never been there berfore. Of course, the issue of which college was not something they could back down on. It was far too important a decision for them to leave to Julie. And the idea of following a high school sweetheart to college was just carrying things too far. She and Vince had found each other at college, and that's the way it should be. The idea of falling in love forever at sixteen was ridiculous. They were twenty, almost adults, when they started dating. It was painful watching her daughter's anguish - it seemed surprisingly real. Of course, faking emotions was a highly developed family art, and Julie may have been doing a good acting job. Sometimes, parents had to use tough love to ensure the best for their children. It would be the best for Julie in the long run. But what about Glen? He was a genuine nice guy, although Theresa could not understand why he avoided their house. It seemed like he was offended by a little honest expression of emotion. Julie could never be happy with someone like that. They were doing her a big favor keeping her away from him for a while. Too bad, though, the kid was an honest to goodness hunk. That reminded her of Julie's comment in the kitchen yesterday: the comment about Glen taking care of her pussy. That level of intimacy would make the separation harder. Oh well, that was not her worry. They as parents had to do the right thing. Thinking of the episode in the kitchen brought a few flurries of guilt, but it was as if last night's tossing and turning had used it all up. Theresa rationalized that she and her husband were entitled to a private sex life, and Julie had no right to criticize. It was unfortunate that she had stumbled on them, and she would have to talk to her daughter about her disgusting display in front of her father. Their family just did not flaunt their bodies like that. It was wrong. And then her refusal to talk unless they were all naked! Where had that come from? And this morning! It was harder than usual for Theresa to rationalize the correctness of her own actions, but she was very good at it. The several totally uncharacteristic responses from Julie required new ways of looking at things, but her confidence in her own rightness and parental expertise was hardly shaken at all. Theresa shook her head slightly to clear the musings that had briefly overtaken her. Her daughter was in some kind of distress, and she wanted to find out what was wrong. All the ways into Julie's room were locked. She knew there was a way to open them with a tool, but she was reluctant to get Vince involved. He was really different since the kitchen episode and Julie's naked display this morning. Julie's only response to her many knocks and pleas was 'Go away!' That was not an acceptable answer from a child, but there seemed little else she could do about it right then. After hanging around for about twenty minutes, Theresa left. ------- Julie was in absolute agony. For the first time in her life, she had thoughts of suicide. The thing she had most feared was separation from Glen. Now, she had caused it herself by losing her temper. As crazed as she was by her anger, she could not recall all of what she had screamed at him. But she could recall the look on his face and the sight of him retching beside the car. She knew with a heart-stopping certainty that she had lost him for good. Damn her terrible temper! Damn her parents for fueling it her whole life! For once the anger was a good thing, for it offset the despair enough to prevent her from ending her life then and there. ------- After heaving his guts out on the curb, Glen staggered back to the driver's seat and drove away. He had a vague impression of someone running after the car and waving, but it was so hard to see through his tears that he could not be certain what he saw. In his despair, the impulse was to drive away as fast as he could from the scene of the horror. Fortunately, his natural caution won out, and he drove carefully, stopping several times when the tears made vision impossible. Pulling up to his house, Glen was not sure he wanted to leave the car. It's isolation was a sort of protection from reality, protection he was loathe to abandon right then. He put his head back and just sat, for how long, he was not sure. After realizing the pain was no less and the isolation was no real protection at all, he dazedly got out and headed for the door. ------- Betty Voss had been enjoying a pleasant Sunday morning home alone. Alan had gone fishing with his brother, both of them taking their younger sons along. Not being very religious as a family, those Sunday fishing outings had become commonplace. This was just fine with Betty. Alan was such a wonderful father, a real pal to his children. Not that he neglected her, either, but she was more than happy for the high quality time he spent with the kids. One of her most heart-warming memories was of Alan hurrying into the pool bleachers for one of Glen's swimming meets. The dual meets were usually early, right after school. Because he worked an early shift, he was one of the few fathers who would always be there. While the men went fishing that Sunday, their daughter Ellie, sixteen, was at her best friend's house. After a long, relaxing bath, Betty donned just a light robe, poured herself a glass of wine, and pulled a romance novel from a bottom drawer. She had panties all laid out, but decided to do without them. The novel, which none of the rest of the family knew about, was a pretty steamy one, and she just might want easier access to her pleasure spot. Propping a pillow against the arm of the living room sofa, she stretched out for a leisurely read. The sensual setting was not a reflection of a lack of sex in Betty's life, it was just something she thoroughly enjoyed. Even after more than twenty years of marriage, Alan kept her very well satisfied in bed. In bed, and elsewhere, she thought with an audible giggle. Betty was big woman. Not fat, just large. At five foot ten, she had wide, muscular, swimmer's shoulders, substantial hips, and muscular thighs. Even after three children, she had kept her waist admirably tight. An impediment when she was swimming competitively, her substantial breasts were a perfect complement to her other sizable assets. Probably because of the sound musculature beneath them, her breasts had minimal sag for her age and their heft. In a swimsuit, at one of her religiously followed workouts in the pool, Betty could have easily qualified for an Amazon role. Her face would be called handsome, not classically beautiful. It was a strong, resolute face, but when she lit up one of her frequent smiles, it changed completely. The recipient of the smile was always prompted to throw out his previous concepts of beauty. When Alan started dating Betty as a teen, she began calling him 'Horndog' as her completely private pet name. At first, she had been a bit put off by the way he openly panted after her. Fortunately, she was mature enough to see that that combination of lust and true devotion was something to be prized in a suitor. Twenty years later, she gave thanks daily for her flash of perception. Today, such a simple thing as walking around the bedroom in panties and a blouse, trying to decide on which slacks to wear, could get him excited enough that she would have to fend him off. Though she tried not to let him know about it, she often had to change panties before donning her slacks after such a playful rebuff. Alan was a big man, standing 6'5". He had a trim, raw-boned physique and a face to match the overall cowboy image. His sexual equipment was scaled properly for his size, a fact Betty discovered to her delight after only a few dates. Despite his appearance, Alan was not at all a macho sort. Oh, he loved sports and outdoors and vehicles and drinking with his buddies. But more than any of those things, he loved Betty and the kids. Through the tight financial times they had suffered, they somehow held onto a rustic cabin on a swimmable lake a few hours away. Alan would give up literally any other activity to take his family there for a getaway. One thing about Alan had given Betty pause while they were dating, and had caused her parents to question Alan's suitability. He did not have great ambitions for financial achievement. He earned an Associate's degree from a local Community College, and got a union job in a manufacturing plant. Betty had opted for true love and physical attraction over the material benefits she might have realized with someone else. Alan was an excellent employee, and moved up nicely to supervisory status. The economic vagaries of manufacturing, however, had hit them hard on three occasions. Betty had gone to work in the breach, but otherwise concentrated on her house and family, keeping only part-time positions revolving around local swimming clubs. Although Alan would never enjoy an executive or professional income, there was one area in which Betty did not feel at all deprived, her home. He was a skillful and enthusiastic do-it-yourselfer. Early in the marriage, both sets of parents had helped them acquire a choice lot. Starting with a small core of what they absolutely needed, the house had since grown to rival those in much grander neighborhoods. The house was admittedly a bit rambling in design, and the appointments were certainly not opulent, but there was space aplenty and luxuries in sufficiency. The sun-lit jacuzzi tub Betty had just left was at the top of her appreciation list. Marty, her younger son, was like a clone of his father. He had begun joining Alan on the house projects when he was not yet a teen, and he was very good. The two of them had actually started taking on some work for other people on the side, in fact having to turn down referrals from satisfied customers. Betty felt certain Alan could make more money as an independent contractor than he did on his job, but was equally certain that he would never take the risk. Looking back, Betty was more than happy with her choice. Among her circle of friends, she was at the bottom in terms of wealth. As far as she knew, though, she was the only one who had had a single lover in her life, and one of only three who were still with their first husband. Having three teenaged kids with not a single behavior or substance abuse problem was unfathomable to the rest of the group. A group of eight women friends had kept a standing Wednesday morning breakfast date for several years. The 'well-fucked look' being no myth, Betty was the frequent target of gibes of barely disguised jealousy. "Come on, Betz! When you gonna start renting out that stud of yours?" had greeted her several weeks ago from one of the divorcees. "Damn, girl! I bet you schedule Tuesday nights just to make us feel bad, don't you?" had been the first comment one other week. At that one, Betty had come up with an uncharacteristic saucy reply. "Well, you know, every night is scheduled. I just wake him up early on Wednesdays to give you guys something to joke about!" That, of course, brought the expected hoots of derision, even though most of the others believed her totally. There were several among the group who would instantly have traded their homes, cars, jewelry, clothes, and memberships for Alan. Betty knew this, and considered it a terrible bargain. Of all the things Betty found enduring about Alan, one in particular was even more important, now. As a big, strong, athletic girl, Betty's self-image suffered greatly in the sex appeal area when she was a teen. Alan had an old-fashioned view of women as the gentler, sweeter sex. He treated Betty like a sexy lady, no matter what, and over time, she began to feel genuinely sexy. To this day, he celebrated the sexy side of her with comments, seductive gifts, etc. Their sixteen-year-old daughter, Ellie, was a near carbon-copy of her mother. Even in those more enlightened sexual times, she had the same sex appeal problems. Without a word from Betty, Alan had mounted a campaign to change all that. He regularly took Ellie on dates, always to places that required dressing up. Dinner, dancing, plays, concerts; Betty was at times tempted to a bit of jealousy, but she knew exactly what Alan was doing and loved him all the more for it. It was wonderful to see that special bond between a father and a daughter. As a twelve-year-old, Ellie had been about as gawky as a pre-teen could be, and that is when Alan started his campaign. He also enlisted Glen's help. Ellie had worshipped her big brother from her earliest awareness, and their shared love of swimming had forged a very nice sibling bond between them. Alan encouraged his son to do anything he could to boost his sister's self-image. On one occasion, Glen had passed Ellie's room and heard her crying. When he came in and sat beside her, she unburdened herself about her body and her discontent with it. "Ellie, don't worry about it. You're only twelve. Before you know it, you're going to be a babe just like Mom," Glen told her with amazing tenderness for a fourteen-year-old boy. "Me? Look like Mom? You've got to be kidding!" "Nope! Dad says you look just like her when she was twelve. You're definitely going to be a babe." From that day on, he rarely called her 'Ellie, ' just 'Babe.' At first, she tried to pooh-pooh it, but it was obvious it meant a lot to her. When she joined him in High School and he would call her 'Babe' in front of her friends, she seemed to instantly grow taller and straighter. Of course, the fact that her loving brother was the heart-throb of every girl she knew did not hurt her self-image, either. Betty's musings naturally turned to the relationship between herself and Glen. With just a touch of shame, she had to admit to a sexual thrill at every thought of her hunk of a son. All of those hours at swim meets watching his thick, smooth muscles ripple and flex as he swam, or pushed himself from the water, or just stood talking to his coach or teammates... That was the first fruit of her womb, and God, had she done well! Today, in particular, she could rejoice in her first-born. He had just received the prize he had dreamed of. He had a full swimming scholarship to one of the best programs in the country. All of the poolside hours now seemed completely worthwhile. Her son had his dream, and the love of his beautiful Julie, besides. Thoughts of Glen and Julie and college introduced the one troubling aspect of Glen's success - they would be separated. Why Julie's parents would not send her to the same school as Glen was beyond Betty. Perhaps they disapproved of Glen, but how could they be that foolish? Glen spent almost no time at their house, but Julie had never hinted at any disapproval from her parents. Knowing how much she herself dreaded Glen's pending absence, she could imagine how it must terrify the girl. There was no doubt in Betty's mind that Julie was reaping the full benefit of the fruit of her womb. Julie was a great girl, one Betty considered completely worthy of her son. There was an intensity to Julie, a flash of passion, that was not present in their own family, but that was not a bad thing. She just hoped the girl appreciated the wonderful loving she was certain her son gave her. She had to stop herself from picturing Glen's cock plunging into the shapely young brunette. It was even harder not to fantasize about engulfing it in her own burning pussy... Betty comforted herself with the assurance that such sexual feelings about her son were only natural. Sometime, she would screw up the courage to ask Ellie if she ever felt her father's hardon while slow dancing on one of their outings. She would bet anything they did not always observe a respectful distance on the dance floor. One time when she and Glen joined them dancing, she herself had certainly not maintained any distance. She had plastered herself to Glen on a slow dance and thrilled at the proof of proper inheritance between his legs. Why should Alan and Ellie be any different. She honestly hoped Alan was giving her an occasional thrill. Ellie needed it. She refused to even think about the ultimate thrill for Ellie, so confident was she that it would never happen. That was the beauty of these precious interludes alone, Betty realized. There was nothing important missing from her life, so when she was alone, she did not feel lonely. Instead, she basked in what she had. As she took the first sip of her wine, its rather warm temperature told how long her lovely reverie had lasted. With a small sigh, she picked up her novel and opened it to the bookmark. Within two or three pages, she had slipped her free hand inside her robe and begun lightly teasing and stroking the hair at the top of her mound. ------- It was after only a dozen pages of reading that Betty heard a car pulling into the driveway. A characteristic run-on and clatter at shut-down assured her that it was their trusty but well-used second car. Glen had taken the car, and he should have been at lunch with Julie right then. Puzzled, she got up and peeked out around the side of the living room drape. What she saw filled her with alarm. Glen, his face ashen, was lying back in the seat. Immediately, Betty assumed Glen was ill, and her first impulse was to rush out to see if he needed help. Besides being dressed only in her light cotton robe, she was restrained by her firm policy of not smothering her children. Both in discipline and assistance, she had always given them plenty of room, waiting for them to come to her or to exceed their specified limits before intervening. Now, seeing her son's condition, it was very hard to stick with her policy, but she persevered. For over fifteen minutes, Betty watched patiently from the corner of the drape. When Glen at last got out of the car, his stance showed utter defeat. This was supposed to be the happiest day of his life. What had gone wrong? Showing remarkable restraint, she did not open the door for him, but waited a couple of steps inside. When he closed the door and turned toward her with anguish evident in his eyes, she asked "Honey, what's wrong?" "It's over!" was all Glen could get out. Then, he clapped his hand over his mouth and dashed toward the small downstairs bathroom, with Betty right on his heels. He just made it to the toilet before letting fly with the first expulsion. Observing how little he spewed and how quickly and painfully he degenerated into dry heaves, Betty guessed that this was not the first time he had thrown up. 'It' over!' Betty had heard. That could only mean one thing: Glen and Julie had broken up. But how? And more incredibly, why? She knew for certain that Glen loved her deeply and sincerely. She was just as certain that Julie felt the same way. It was hard to imagine anything that could have caused the breakup. Except... except the impending separation. If that was true, then damn the Menconis! Had they no idea what their stubbornness had done? As her anger started to build, she reminded herself that Glen needed her right now, and she didn't really know what had happened. By the time the retching stopped, Glen was trembling alarmingly, obviously in shock. Betty made him sit back in the corner of the small bathroom, then gave him some water from the small glass on the sink. He rinsed his mouth and spit a couple of times before swallowing some of the water. She noticed that his clothes reeked of vomit. Not sure just where the problem was, she pulled off the nice sweater he had on, then unbuttoned and removed his button-down shirt. While he still sat, she took of his shoes, then she helped him to his feet. He had trouble standing, he was trembling so badly. Kneeling in front of him and placing his hands on her shoulders for support, she unbuckled and pulled down his slacks, leaving him in just his jockey shorts. There were goosebumps all over Glen's body, and the trembling had increased, if anything. Betty looked around frantically for something to wrap him in, but without success. The bath had only a stool and a sink, so there were no large towels. She thought briefly off removing her robe and wrapping it around him, but realized the minimum warmth it offered did not justify her certain embarrassment. Deciding there was no other option, she took him firmly by one arm and helped him up the stairs to his bed. He was able to move with her help, but she doubted he could have gone anywhere by himself. A couple of times, he almost fell to the stairs as his knees buckled. Pulling the covers back, Betty helped Glen lie down, then covered him up. She grabbed the extra blanket from the closet shelf and added that on top of him, making sure he was tightly surrounded. She became more alarmed as she saw that the shakes were even worse than before. His eyes opened and he looked at her, but she had the impression he was not registering what he saw. As a little panic set in, the thought hit her - body heat! Without another thought for propriety, Betty tossed off her robe and got under the covers. She rolled Glen onto his back and laid right on top of him, her concern for his health damping out any other consideration. With the objective of as much skin to skin contact as possible, she placed her forearms outside of his upper arms and covered as much of his shoulders as possible with her hands. She spread her legs outside of his and used her strong inner thigh muscles to force his legs tight together. Her crotch was spread lewdly over his, but she felt no bulge of arousal. Laying her head on his shoulder with her face against his neck, she began talking to him, trying to break through his near-catatonia and soothe him. The shakes were so bad she had to strain to hold onto him. She had a brief thought of the almost sexual way they were thrashing around, but the whole situation was far too serious to dwell on that thought. At the point where Betty was just about to get up and call an ambulance, the shakes finally started to ease. All this time, he had said nothing, and she was not sure he was fully conscious. After several minutes of residual tremors, he finally let out a long sigh. She rolled them over to their sides and pulled his face between the substantial mounds of her breasts. He raised his head and looked into her eyes. She gave him a gentle kiss on his forehead, and he disintegrated. Up until now, Glen's arms had been limp at his sides. Now, he slid one under his mother and used both arms to pull himself tightly to her, face planted firmly in her bare cleavage. His tears flowed seemingly by the cupful, pouring over her breast. Unable to restrain herself, her own tears joined his, trickling over his face and his hair. As much as she could within his death grip, she rocked him back and forth, and spoke encouraging words between her sobs. Everything had happened without thought or planning. Betty was naked in bed with her nearly naked grown son. His face was at her bare breast, returning to the first place he had ever come for sustenance and comfort. She should have been alarmed or ashamed, she thought, but she felt neither of those. What she felt was great relief that she had helped him through the crisis of his shock; she felt the same anguish that was pouring from him in his tears; she felt incredible love for the wonderful person her first-born had become. Above everything else, she felt a wonderful closeness that exceeded any they had ever shared before. She had a fleeting thought that if she had known what that closeness was like, she would have bared herself to her children long ago. The Voss household was not body-shy. With three people who spent part of their lives in public in very revealing swim gear, excessive modesty was not likely to be a problem. This, though, was far beyond any normal display or contact. Glen and his mother always showed affection for each other quite freely with hugs, kisses, and cuddles. None of the family, though, displayed themselves naked, except by the rarest of accidents. Glen had seen his mother many times in just underthings, and had freely expressed his appreciation of the sight. Although never purposely displaying herself, Betty would admit to not trying very hard to avoid it. She liked her son's reaction, just as she liked her husband's. The continued verification of her sex appeal was important to her. With the deep concern for his safety removed, Betty could think more about their situation. She was always thrilled by Glen's body, but feeling it now, skin against skin, she could not avoid a sexual thrill. While running her hand lightly over his back, she wondered if he was experiencing a similar thrill. Then, she chided herself severely. He was in the middle of the worst emotional crisis of his life. It was bad enough to make him physically ill, and here she was wondering if her body was giving him a hardon. She had better get up and get some clothes on right now, and stop this incestuous nonsense before he became fully aware of her condition. Glen's sobs had stopped, now, and Betty was about to leave the bed and get dressed, but it was too late. "Mom!" Glen uttered, then pulled away from her in alarm. "What... why?" "It was the only thing I could think of to warm you up. Thank God it worked!" "I was pretty bad, huh? I really don't remember." As he spoke, his eyes were fastened on her breasts, just inches from her face. "Yes, you were pretty bad. I was just ready to call the ambulance when you finally stopped shaking." "And you got n... naked so you could warm me up? God, that must have been hard for you!" "Not really. You're my man, and you were in trouble. I would have done anything." "You really would, wouldn't you? But... but aren't you embarrassed now, Mom?" "It's funny, but I'm not really. To be honest, it felt wonderful to be so close to you. Are you disgusted with me?" "Disgusted? How could I ever be. You know how much I love you. And please don't be offended, but, God, you're beautiful. I mean, I knew that before, but naked you're just awesome!" This was the time to cover up and end the touching, intimate little scene. But at the moment, Glen was mercifully distracted, and that was a good thing. Besides, as it always did, his adoration of her body thrilled her to the core. Who was really hurt if she just stayed like this with him for a while? She still had to find out what had happened. Maybe this would make the telling a little less painful. Taking a deep breath, Betty told her son, "Honey, why don't you come back here and hold me tight, then tell me what happened." She saw a look of shock and reluctance, and added "Please!" Taking the initiative, she moved toward him, pulling his face back between her breasts. She was thrilled and relieved when he hesitantly circled her with his arms, then pulled her close. The telling was painful for both of them. Glen broke into tears almost immediately, and she could not help but follow. At her prompting, he replayed some of the things Julie had said about him and the names she had called him. They were unbelievably cruel, and she was stunned that Julie could have said them, knowing how she felt about him. From the first, she sensed an unreality about Julie's words, but she could not think of a way to relay that sense to her shattered son. After many minutes, Glen had fallen silent, and Betty had not thought of anything to say. She rolled him on his back and settled under his arm with her head on his chest. One of her legs was between his, snugged up against his crotch. His penis was completely flaccid, and Betty got the intuitive feeling that it would be very good for him to get aroused. It would not be good to do anything overt, though. She would make it happen gently, naturally. They lay cuddled in silence for many more minutes before Glen began absently running his hand up and down her back. Betty was thrilled, both because it felt so good, and because it was sign he was more aware of his surroundings. For several minutes she tried not to squirm from the delicious feelings. Eventually, his hand drifted down to the tops of her ass cheeks. After only a couple of light caresses, he stiffened, then jerked his hand away. "It's OK, Baby," she assured him. "I don't mind. I love it." After an uncertain pause, he stroked right down over her cheek, bringing a contented hum from her. He had only stroked her bottom a few times before he stopped and broke into a new round of tears. "What's the matter, Honey?" she asked softly. "It's... it's... she... she... God! What am I going to do without her?" "I'm so, so sorry, Honey. I don't know what to tell you. I can only imagine how it hurts. All I can do is love you." Betty did not try to say any more as she lay practically on top of him with his hand now resting motionless on her ass. It was a frustratingly long time before he thrilled her by very gently resuming his caresses. She was worried that he would feel the moistness of her pussy against his thigh, but she was glad for the evidence that he could relate to something besides his own anguish. Mercifully, Glen drifted off and slept for about half an hour. Betty was more than happy to stay snuggled against him. When he woke, she told him "Honey, I'm sure you don't feel much like eating, but you need to get some fluids into you. Come to the kitchen with me, and I'll fix you something." "Um... OK. I've... uh... gotta use the bathroom, first," he told her. She got out of bed, picked up her robe from the floor, and walked out of the room with it in her hand. In the hall, she stopped to put it on, but thought again of how Glen was reacting to her body, and how desperately he needed to focus on something outside of himself. Convincing herself she was just doing it for him, she continued on to the kitchen, robe still in her hand. When she heard the toilet flush, Betty had a moment of panic, not at all sure she could go through with it. By the time she set a glass of orange juice at Glen's spot at the table and popped a bagel in the toaster, it was too late to change her mind. Glen felt like he was sleep-walking, there was such an unreal feeling about his motions. He found his way to the kitchen only to be brought up short by the even more unreal sight of his mother standing naked at the counter, facing away from him. "Mom!" he blurted out. "Sit at your place, Honey," she said as she turned and walked toward the table to wait for him. "Orange juice will be good to restore your fluids. You'll need to drink lots of water, too, after the way you threw up. A bagel will be popping up in a minute. I know you don't feel like eating, but please try it, OK?" She worked very hard to make her voice sound natural, but was not at all sure she succeeded. "Uh, why are you still naked, Mom?" "Don't you like seeing me like this?" "God, yes, but..." "Well good. I want to distract you as much as I can." As she spoke, Betty stepped right up to his chair and pulled his face against her tummy. She was pretty sure he could smell her arousal, but that would be a good distraction, too. To her delight, he put his arm around her and pulled himself even closer. "You are the best distraction I could imagine, Mom." Releasing their embrace, Betty busied herself around the kitchen, doing a number of things that were totally unnecessary. She had to keep moving to keep from chickening out, and she was hoping against hope that she could arouse him. After purposely bending over straight-legged to do some superfluous rearrangement of a lower shelf, she was delighted to see him gaping at her slack-jawed, and absolutely thrilled to see his cock about to push out from under the waistband of his jockeys. Emulating a runway walk as best she could, Betty came over to her son and rotated his chair away from the table. "About time! I thought I'd totally lost my touch!" she said with a giggle as she pointedly stared at his erection. Frantically trying to cover up, Glen's face turned beet red and he sputtered "Sorry, Mom! I... I..." Playfully swatting his hands away from in front of his crotch, Betty sat on his lap facing him with her legs straddling his. She pushed her crotch forward so it was against his erection and once again pulled his face against her breast. "Hug!" she ordered him, and she was rewarded by his hands instantly caressing her backside from neck to ass cheeks. "Honey," Betty started with a slight quake in her voice, "please don't think me a bad person, but I have been trying to get you hard, and there's a reason. You are a beautiful man. You have a beautiful body, a beautiful heart, and a beautiful cock. You are going to have a wonderful life with some lucky woman. I sincerely hope it is Julie, and despite what happened, my heart tells me it will be. But however it turns out, the real Glen is still here, you're still beautiful, and everything works." "Right now, my willpower is stretched to it's limit. I want to set myself down on that magnificent cock of yours so badly I can hardly stand it. I think you know why I can't though, don't you? You dad is my one and only, and it's going to stay that way forever. I'm going do something that may shock you, though, because I think it's just what you need." Standing up from his lap, Betty pulled down the waistband of his shorts and ordered him "Raise up!" Hardly aware of what was happening, he complied and she pulled his jockeys down and off. "Oh, my! Even better than I imagined," she cooed as she took hold of his straining shaft with both hands. After a few strokes, she lowered one hand to his balls and he instinctively spread his legs to give her access. She increased the intensity of her stroking, and within less than a dozen more, he let loose. The emotional intensity was so high, he came like he was emptying his whole insides through his cock. Spurt after spurt after spurt blasted from him, the first few landing way up her arms and onto her breasts. The after-spurts and twitches seemed to go on for minutes before she let go and kissed him quickly on the lips. As she stood at the sink rinsing the cum from her body, Glen regained his voice and asked "Mom, can I do for you?" Betty turned back from the sink, wiping water from her breasts with a hand towel, and with tears clearly showing in her eyes. "Oh, Honey, thank you for asking. I knew you would think of me. I can't, though. I hope you understand. What I did was for you was because you needed it badly. I'm for your dad. I... I need to leave you for a while, now. I've used up all my will power. I love you so much!" She slipped her robe on and walked out, unable to go near him because she feared what it would lead to. It was a few minutes before Glen could move, and then it was because he noticed the cum drying and cooling on his skin and on the chair under him. Shaking his head in an attempt to return to reality, he managed to clean the chair with some damp paper towels before heading off to the shower. He had always loved his mother deeply, and had many times been amazed by what she was willing to do for her children. What she had done today eclipsed anything he could have imagined. And she had been right to do what she did. The loss of Julie still weighed terribly on him. It would have suffocated him had it not been for the thoughts of his mother, how beautiful and sexy she was, and what she had been willing to do. It was a distraction, and it helped him, a lot. A leisurely shower helped a lot, too, and getting dressed brought a sense of humanity to Glen. Leaving the bedroom, he thought first of finding his mother. Checking in the kitchen, he actually chuckled when he had to pick up his jockeys that were still laying under the chair. Walking back to the master bedroom, he saw her sitting motionless on the edge of the bed, still in her robe, and with the moisture in her eyes obvious. Moving quickly to sit beside her, Glen put his arm around her and just said "I love you, Mom." "I... I can't believe what I did. You don't think I'm awful?" "Awful? How can you think that? I think I understand why you're upset at what you did. But believe me, you were right. It helped me more than you can know. And I think you are the most wonderful person in the world." "D... do you worry that our relationship will be different, now?" "It will definitely be different," he told her. "But I'm sure not worried, because it will be even better than before, believe me." She snuggled contentedly against him after those words, and they were still and silent for a while. "I do regret one thing, though," he told her, and she stiffened in alarm. Before she could say anything, he went on. "I'll never get to see your full beauty like that again." He felt the tension leave her, and she turned and swatted him playfully on the arm. "Oh, you... men! Only thinking of one thing!" Her pretend indignation was not at all convincing. "You really liked it that much?" "Damn right I did. Why else would I get a hardon when my heart was breaking? You don't think Dad is the only man you turn on, do you?" "Well, if you like it that much, there just might be other chances. Who knows?" Mother and son just sat and basked in their newfound intimacy for a long time, breaking apart only when the first of the other family members returned home. As each of the others came home, Betty told them briefly about what had happened. Glen managed to join them for supper, and was able to converse a little, although it was awkward for everyone. After a long evening of television and conversation, everyone else had retired, but Glen stayed in the family room. He had been sitting with the lights and TV off for twenty minutes when Betty came in and pulled him to his feet. "Come on. It's time for bed." "I really don't want to get in bed. I know I won't sleep." "I'm sleeping with you." "But what about Dad." "His orders." Arm in arm they went upstairs to his room. As he undressed, he looked at her with a question, then snorted and chuckled before shucking his briefs. "Not much point in modesty any more, is there?" He got in bed and she was ready to slide in when she stopped and took off the simple cotton nightgown she was wearing. Glen looked pointedly at the panties she still had on, but she told him "Sorry, gotta keep the panties this time. Otherwise your sheets will reek with pussy juice by morning. Sleeping with a stud does that to me." Once again, his mother knew what she was doing. By mutual understanding, they did nothing more than hug and share some light caresses. It was enough, and Glen was able to fall asleep before very long. A long, restorative sleep was not to be that night, however. The distractions faded in the face of his dreams, and he woke several times, waking Betty as well with his tossing and turning. It was not a restful night for either mother or son. ------- Monday had been an very difficult day for Glen. He had gone to school, despite the advice of his parents. His attempts to act natural had apparently been total failures. Every one of his friends had tried to find out what was wrong. Ellie did not yet know the full story and had been sworn to secrecy, so the word had not gotten out. Supper with the family had been hard, too. They all sincerely wanted to help, but there was really nothing any of them could do. There was some homework that needed to be done, and it took over twice as long as it should have. His concentration was continually broken by thoughts of Julie, memories of their study times together, and the constant question - Why? He had just gotten into bed and turned off the bedside lamp when his bedroom door opened. A vision in T-shirt and panties was outlined by backlighting from the hall. After a moment to catch his breath, he was able to say "Hi, Babe." "Hey, Flip," Ellie replied. When he first started calling her 'Babe, ' she felt the need to retaliate with a nickname for him. She came up with 'Flip, ' short of 'Flipper' because she said he swam like a porpoise. She had used the name ever since. "I don't think you should be alone tonight. Can I sleep with you?" Part of Glen wanted his sister to just leave him alone with his anguish. But he loved her too much to reject her, and his rational mind longed for something to take his thoughts off of his loss. "I'd love that, but I don't think Mom and Dad would be thrilled." "Mom sent me," Ellie assured him as she closed the door and slid in beside him. They both lay on their backs in silence until she grabbed his hand and asked him "Will you please tell me all about it?" Last Straw ------- Chapter 3 (15 years earlier) Not sure he was up to reliving it, Glen still could not refuse his little sister. She was certainly old enough to know about the problems of love. "I don't think I can talk about it unless I have a beautiful woman in my arms." With an honest tone of disappointment, Ellie told him. "Oh, sorry. I'll go see if Mom will stay with you." She was actually starting to get up when he pulled her over on top of himself. The two had always been close and affectionate, but this was a new level of body contact, particularly so scantily clad. Glen typically slept in just some cut off sweats. In the darkness, Glen could not see his sister's face, but could sense her wide-eyed amazement at having her chest plastered against his side with his arm around her. "I'm sorry, Babe. Does this make you uncomfortable?" There was a long pause before Ellie responded. "No, um... I'm... a... maybe too comfortable." As she felt him ease his grip on her, she decided she wanted this kind of comfort and wriggled herself into him. "Hug!" she told him. When he did, she boldly threw her leg over his, her pussy now pressed firmly against his hip. Waiting a few minutes to enjoy the closeness and to compose himself for the trauma, he told his sister everything, answering many questions along the way. He could not avoid tears, and she joined with him. She was a little surprised but enormously pleased at the more intimate revelations, and her love for her brother swelled along with her sympathy. The siblings lay quietly for many minutes after the talking and the tears ended. Ellie thought he had fallen asleep when he piped up, "Ellie, is this a good time for an 'I told you so?'" The fact that he was awake surprised her, but his calling her 'Ellie' surprised her even more. "Wh... what do you mean?" "Well, remember when I first started calling you 'Babe'?" "Sure! God, I was a gawky freak then." "Remember why I called you 'Babe'?" "You, uh, said someday I would be a gorgeous babe just like Mom." "Right. I told you so!" At a loss for words only for a moment, she gave him a light swat and protested "Flatterer! You're just saying that 'cuz you've got me half naked in bed with you!" She was glad he could not see her grin. She did not realize she was grinning so hard he could hear it. "Not at all," he told her. "Look in the mirror much? Tell me what you see." "Gle-en! That's embarrassing!" She was almost beside herself with excitement, but she certainly could not let on to him. "Seriously. Start with your face. What do you see?" he urged her. This put a little damper on her excitement, because she was not happy with her face. "Well, it sure isn't any movie star's face," she said rather glumly. "Ever smile at yourself in the mirror," he demanded. "Uh, I don't think so. I'm usually not that happy with what I see." "Well, try it some time. You won't need any other lights on in the room." That produced a little giggle from her. "Seriously, Babe, you've got a beautiful face, and a killer smile. Be sure to use that smile a lot." His last comment took away the momentary glum feeling. "OK. Tell me about your neck." The conversation continued for quite a while, with Glen asking for her detailed impressions of each body part. He worked through neck, shoulders, arms, hands, feet, legs, and tummy - all the publicly visible parts. He would not let her gloss over anything, usually getting her to admit that each part was attractive and sexy. As they traversed her anatomy, Ellie was getting excited and a little fearful about the private parts. Surely he wouldn't ask about them, would he? He certainly would. "OK, Babe. How about your butt? What do you think of it? Are you happy with it?" By the time he had convinced her how sexy her butt was, she was almost bouncing up and down waiting for the next part. "Well, not too many parts left, are there, Babe? Are you starting to believe my 'I told you so, ' now? Course the best parts of all are still to come, aren't they. What do you see when you look at your boobs in the mirror?" She knew it was coming, and actually wanted it to, but she felt obligated to feign indignation, which she did. He was undeterred. "I've got to admit, I've spent a lot of time looking at them, Babe, and I am really impressed. 37 C, or maybe D are they?" She was unable to squeak out an answer. "Tell me about the nipples. I never had a chance to see them. Are they light or dark. Do they turn up a little or not. I guess that's not common on boobs as big as yours, huh? How long are they when they're stiff." He was laying it on for all he was worth, now. "God, Glen, all these questions! Why don't I just take off my shirt and show you?" Softening his tone to one of sincerity and reverence, he told her "Ellie, Babe, if you ever chose to show me, it would be a wonderful gift, and I would be honored." Both were quiet for a moment before he totally changed the mood again. "I guess that only leaves your pussy." "Gle-en! Please! Not until you tell me about your c..." She froze before she finished the word. "You sneak! I thought I was here to comfort you. You're not heartbroken, you're just a pervert." She tried to sound angry, but her heart wasn't in it. "Ellie, Ellie. You can't imagine how much your being here has helped me. My heart really is broken. But it's also full of love for my wonderful sister. The one beautiful thing you can't see in the mirror is your heart, and it's beautiful just like Mom's. I just want to be sure you realize how beautiful you are all over." Of course, there was no way Ellie could hold off tears after such an emotional exchange, and she didn't really try very hard. After thoroughly watering his shoulder, she finally murmured "Why did you have to be my brother?" "I know just how you feel, Babe. Please tell me your feelings for me haven't kept you away from other guys." "No, not really. 'Course it hasn't been a problem 'cause the guys aren't showing a lot of interest." "Are you doing everything you can to get them interested?" he asked gently. "Um, maybe not," she admitted. "Well, we need to talk about baiting the man trap better. You've got some awesome bait there, and once you get serious, the guys won't have a chance." "You really mean that, don't you?" Ellie asked. "God, I love you!" She blurted out as she burrowed into him as hard as she could. "I love you, too, Babe, and thanks for being with me tonight. Um, one other thing. Maybe you were joking about my cock, but if you're ever curious about anything, don't be afraid to ask. I mean anything, OK?" "Thanks. Sometimes I feel pretty naive. Guess we'd better get to sleep, huh?" Ellie suffered the same fate as her mother had the night before. Neither sibling had enjoyed much restful sleep by time they had to get up. For Ellie, at least the high from their intimate conversation was enough to carry her through the day. For Glen, he would be running on sheer nerve even if he had been blessed with good sleep. ------- Terrible as was Glen's grief, he at least had a loving family who did everything they could to support and assist him. Julie had no such advantages. Later, Julie could not remember how she made it through the rest of Sunday and Sunday night. Monday morning, both parents attempted to get her to let them in, citing her need to go to school, and promising to help with whatever her problem was. Her only response through it all was to tell them to go away. Whatever else they were, the Menconis were not stingy, and Julie's room was well-equipped, having a stereo, TV, and private phone line. Except for food, for which she as yet had no desire, there was no real need to leave her room. All day Monday, she found some way to pass the agonizing hours. Twice more, she retched into the toilet with nothing left to throw up. Afterward, she huddled in her bed until the shakes passed. What Julie needed more than anything was a friend, some one to whom she could tell everything. Lately, that had been Glen, but Candy was still like her substitute sister. Julie could hardly wait until Candy got home from school so she could call her. She felt like she was bursting from the pent-up despair, with no outlet for it. Julie did not have to call, because Candy beat her to it. "Hey, Jules! Where were you today? And what's wrong with Glen? He looks like shit?" That threw Julie into a paroxysm of sobbing and another retching bout, all while Candy waited on the line, frightened for her friend. While still quivering under the covers, Julie began spilling the whole story to her friend. She left out the encounter in the kitchen, something she decided no one else should ever know about. Candy was one of only three friends who knew anything about Julie's home life and her monumental temper. While still amazed, Candy could at least believe what had happened. There was nothing she could do about Julie's plight, but she could and did listen. For nearly two hours, much of it spent in wordless tears, Julie exposed her anguish to her sympathetic friend. "Candy, I don't know what I'm going to do. Everything is ruined. I can't stand to see my folks, but there's nowhere else I can go. I think the only answer is to end it all." "Julie! Julie! Don't even think that. Come and live with me! We'll really be sisters, then." "How can I do that? What about your parents?" "They love you, you know that. It'll work, believe me. Tell you what. You get everything packed. When you see a chance to get away, just call me. I mean it. Will you do it?" A goal, something to work toward, is as good as anything to blunt the pangs of grief. The chance to get away temporarily brought Julie out of her semi-aware state. "I... I'll get ready," she assured Candy as they finally ended the call. Concerned that her mother might hear the sounds of packing, Julie did nothing about it until well after they went to bed. During the evening, both parents had tried several more times to talk to her, but she still said no more than 'Go away.' Packing turned out to be a blessing, because attempts to sleep brought torment. She would start to drift off, and images of Glen's stricken face as she screamed at him would jar her awake. Other times, it was him emptying his stomach at the curb. Still other times, she would drift off to sleep to dream endlessly of forever chasing after his disappearing car. There was surprisingly little for Julie to pack. She had a fairly full closet of good quality clothes, only a small portion of which she actually wore. Theresa had, of course, tightly controlled her daughter's clothes purchases, and her choices were generally embarrassing to a contemporary teen. Ever since starting High School, Julie had been within walking distance of school, and Candy's home was on the way. The two girls were the same size. Candy graciously shared her much less extensive wardrobe, and Julie added what little she could manage to buy on her own to the common pool. Julie would wear her own clothes- her mother's, as she thought of them - to Candy's house, then change before heading to school. For some reason, Theresa had not caught on to how few clothes Julie had acquired over the past four years. When Candy's mother first became aware of the daily clothing exchange, she had been faced with a moral dilemma. She did not like the idea of assisting with the deception of a fellow mother. On the other hand, she had never met Theresa and loved Julie like an extra daughter. Julie had actually inspired her own Candy to levels of tidiness she had never expected, and Candy's grades were by far the best of any of her children. Many times, Julie had wept out her pent-up frustration on her shoulder or her husband's. Candy's mother had to admit that the clothes Julie wore to their house were more appropriate for her than for her daughter. It took several bedroom discussions, but both of Candy's parents agreed that their best role was as a true refuge for Julie. Thereafter, they helped as much as they could with the clothes and anything else Julie wanted kept secret from Vince and Theresa. The nice set of luggage that Julie had used only three times was unfortunately not in her room. She would have to sneak down into the house to get it. Planning how to get her luggage led her to think about food. Though the thought almost made her ill, she knew she could not go on indefinitely without it. She decided to go foraging after her parents were asleep. The master bedroom was on the main floor, and she would not need to go too near their room. The stairway had the usual squeaky places, but she knew them all. She would make it work. From the time she heard her parents retire until after 2am, Julie busied herself with selecting the few clothes she would take, and sorting through her non-clothes possessions. While arranging her cosmetics, she suffered another bout of crying when she came to her birth control pills. Her period was just underway, which was good because she probably would have forgotten to take one that day. Although she could not envision any future need for them, they had become a well-ingrained habit, and she set the container and two months of backup supply with the things she would pack. In the wee hours, when she was as sure about her parents being asleep as she would ever be, Julie set out to forage. Actually smiling slightly when she thought of it, she stripped before heading off, but put on tennis shoes for the bare basement storage room floor. She thought that if she happened to encounter her father, his shock at her nakedness would give her a chance to flee back to her room. There was just a slight tickle from the string of the tampon brushing her upper thigh as she moved. Knowing that she was taking a chance, she went immediately down the short hall to the master bedroom after reaching the main floor. She stood motionless with her ear against the closed door for several minutes, but heard nothing to indicate wakefulness. The nighttime air made her bare flesh uncomfortable, but she pushed the feelings from her mind. After easing down the stairs to the basement, she felt it safe to turn on a light for the first time. In the storage room, she found her luggage. She also came across some large plastic storage bags and a picnic cooler, which she set out. She went through the storage room and a couple of downstairs closets looking for other possessions she might want to take. Since talking to Candy, Julie had convinced herself that she would be moving out for good. She had no idea how she would exist, but the need to get away overpowered any other concern at the time. Her friends would help her all they could, and the Vosses - suddenly, she was in tears again. Thinking of safety and refuge brought up images of Glen and his family, and the scope of her loss overwhelmed her. She sat huddled on the cooler for several minutes, trying to get her emotions under control. It took three cautious trips to get the luggage and a few other items up to her room. She went back once more and brought the cooler to the kitchen. Taking a huge chance with noise, she very, very slowly filled the bottom of it with ice cubes. Then, she put in some soft drinks and put some orange juice and milk in plastic containers. She found some apples and bananas, and grabbed a box of cereal, some chips, and some cookies. Looking at her haul, she had the sense to go back to the refrigerator and take some cold cuts for a little protein. After two more rather nervous trips, Julie had completed her foraging, and got busy packing. She was very tired, but actually welcomed the escape from troubling sleep. Nibbling uncertainly at her food supply as she worked, she packed and arranged until daylight started to illuminate the room. Then she stopped, not wanting her folks to suspect what she was planning. Forcing herself to eat some cereal and milk first, Julie collapsed in bed, and actually fell asleep in the the watery dawn light. Perhaps an hour and a half later, her still-futile chase after Glen's car was interrupted by her mother pounding on the door. As she struggled awake, the horror of her situation again overcame her, and she raced her rising nausea to the bathroom. In the hall, Theresa heard her daughter retching, and was struck by her own horror. "Oh God? Julie! Are you pregnant!? Oh, no! Oh, no! Please tell me you're not pregnant! Julieeeee!" Theresa's pleas trailed off into sobs. Julie was struck by her mother's tears and the evidence of her genuine alarm. It was a reaction she was not at all used to. Authoritative and controlling was the demeanor Julie almost always encountered, and Theresa's obvious anguish was a revelation. Even through her own discomfort she was moved by it. Of course, it would not do to let on that she was not pregnant, so Julie just gasped out her standard 'go away' response. Tuesday was a very long day for Julie. Her mother only left the house twice, and not for very long. As she heard the car leave each time, she resumed her packing, trying to get ready for a rapid exit. Theresa's first act upon returning was to check on Julie, each time pleading to know if Julie was pregnant. Julie, of course, gave only the same 'go away.' During the times when she could not pack, Julie thought about her mother's paranoia with possible pregnancy. It was not something she had ever considered. She had never slipped up in over a year on the pill. Pregnancy was to her, like to most teens, the biggest bogeyman of all. The fact that her possible pregnancy caused her mother near hysteria made Julie start thinking of it in a new light. Initially, it's possible value as a tactic lay in the effect it would have on her mother. Then, she began to see other advantages. All the while she was packing, Julie was troubled by the long-range implications. She was a thoughtful, careful person by nature, but she was about to take the most impetuous action of her life. Candy's family could not take her in permanently. How long could she stay without being a burden? Where would she go from there? Could she find a job? Was there a girl she could room with? As she thought about possibilities, Julie realized with a start that college had not even entered her thinking when wondering where she would live. Of course, her mother's fear of her pregnancy centered around the impact it would have on future plans, primarily college. If college was a reason to avoid pregnancy and she was not going to her parents' college no matter what and there was nowhere else to go, then... What if she was living with Glen? What if they were a family - married? That had been her ideal future ever since they had started dating. What if it was now? If she was pregnant with Glen's baby, there was no doubt he would marry her. The idyllic vision conjured up by that scenario was shattered rather quickly by the realization that she had ruined any chance of Glen impregnating her. She had probably ruined any chance of him even talking to her. She had been half asleep while musing, but a new wave of nausea had her on her feet rushing for the toilet once again. When she was back in bed, shaky from her throes, Julie fantasized about getting married to Glen. It struck her that he was her only hope - her only chance of escape from home and from loneliness. But he was no hope now that she had destroyed their relationship. This time, she avoided the nausea, but uncontrolled sobbing made up for it. She heard her mother once, outside her door, but she could not stifle her crying, and Theresa must have decided it was useless to try any more. Theresa did try at suppertime, offering to leave a tray outside Julie's door. This time, Julie added a resounding 'No' to her usual rebuff. Not long afterward, both parents left in the car together. There was no way of knowing how long they might be gone, but she dove for the phone and called Candy. Within ten minutes, Candy and her parents were there with two cars and a younger brother to help. Everyone sprinted in and out of the house, anxious to avoid any chance of Vince and Theresa returning while they were emptying Julie's room. The cars were packed with as much as they could hold in less then forty-five minutes, and there was nothing of significance left. Julie sent the parents and brother off with the load while she went back in to straighten her room. Candy stayed with her, mystified why her friend would risk discovery just to leave her room pristine for the last time. While Julie made the bed, Candy looked in the closet and saw the Prom dress hanging, and the matching shoes still on the rack. As gently as possible, she rolled them up and covered them with the light jacket she had worn. Being slinky, the dress took up very little space. Just as Julie was taking a last look back at her long-time sanctuary, they heard a car pull up. They dashed down the stairs and waited by the front door until they were sure the car was in the garage, then slipped out. Julie even managed a little giggle as they made their escape down the block. She had planned to write a short note, but had run out of time. The familiar walk to Candy's house took only a few minutes. She had no way of knowing her parents had just returned from Glen's. ------- While Julie was moving out, the doorbell rang at the Voss reidence, and Alan went to answer it. Even-tempered as he was, he could not manage to look welcoming as he saw the Menconis facing him. "Hello, Alan," Vince said. "Could we please speak to Glen?" Looking back and forth between the husband and wife, Alan waited several seconds before responding. "Your daughter absolutely destroyed my son. I can't imagine he would want to see you." "She what?!!" Theresa almost screamed. "She has been locked in her room for over two days, crying and throwing up. We thought Glen did something to her." After another long pause, Alan told them "I guess you had better come in. I'll see if I can get Glen to come down." He knew Glen should at least talk to them out of politeness, but would understand completely if he refused. Betty had been in the kitchen and heard the exchange, but decided her presence would not be helpful. Before speaking to Glen, Alan instructed the other two children to stay in their rooms until the guests left. It took several minutes to convince Glen that he should at least talk to Julie's parents. Much of that time was spent trying to keep him from unloading his pent-up anger at them. With his father's admonition to be polite ringing in his ears, Glen made his way to the living room. Theresa and Vince were still standing, looking very uncomfortable, when Glen came down the stairs. He just stood at the bottom, trying to compose himself before saying, in as even a voice as he could "Why are you here? You got what you wanted." "Wh... what do you mean by that," Theresa asked. Glen was very surprised to see the uncertainty in her face. "We are broken up. We are no longer a couple. Are you here to warn me not to try to get her back, or what?" "Why would you blame us for your breakup," Vince asked. That was too much for Glen. He gave a derisive snort and turned to go back up the stairs. "Wait, don't leave, please!" Once again, Theresa was far from her usual self-assured self. Turning to Vince, she said, "He's talking about college, Honey. I told you they would see it that way." "Listen, Glen," Vince joined in, "we are not sending her to our school to separate you two. We just want the best possible education for her." "That's funny." Glen could not restrain his sarcasm. "You're paying half again as much to send her to a school rated 150th, while my school is rated 16th." "We think the experience of the small school will be much better for her," Theresa added in an almost pleading tone. "It's our decision to make," Vince added. "It certainly is," Glen agreed. "I hope you are pleased with the result. Now, if that's all, I'm trying to study." Again, he turned back toward the stairs. "No, wait! We need to know what happened. Julie hasn't come out of her room since Sunday noon." Theresa's voice had a frantic edge to it. "When I told her I got the scholarship, she went crazy," Glen told them. "She started yelling and screaming at me. She accused me of unbelievable things that I would never do to her. She called me names I could not imagine she even knew. Then she stomped into the house with not even a goodbye." "And you thought she did that to break up with you?" Vince asked. "Thought? How much more plain could she make it?" Theresa looked like she was ready to cry. "Glen, she didn't mean any of that. She was just upset and got hysterical." "Oh, sure! You expect me to believe she didn't mean those things?" "I'm sure she didn't. Um... sometimes in our family, we, uh, get into some pretty heated arguments. We say a lot of things to try to win, but we don't really mean them. It's... it's just the way we are." "That's ridiculous!" Glen spat out. "No rational person would do that just to win an argument. I'm insulted that you would think I could believe something that crazy." Vince and Theresa stared at each other in obvious shock at how Glen reacted to her revelation. "Look, after the way you've manipulated her, I can't figure out why you're here making excuses for her. I don't think we have anything more to talk about. I'm trying to get on with my life, and you're not helping at all." Glen was clearly angry by this time. "Do you still love her?" Theresa asked. That was an amazing question, if Glen had stopped to think about it. Julie's parents had never openly admitted that there might be true, lasting love between her and Glen. "That's a stupid question!" Glen spat out. "If you have to ask it, you don't understand a damn thing!" "Now wait a minute," Vince objected. "There's no call to talk to her that way." "You're right. I'm sorry. You can show yourselves out." This time, Glen went right up the stairs to his room. ------- At his desk, Glen was completely unable to focus on his books, and just stared at the blank wall for many minutes. Ellie chanced to walk by and saw him through the slightly opened door. She had never been in love, and did not know what his heartache was like. She did know her brother, though, and she ached for him. He had always been such a rock; unflappable, considerate, cheerful. Against her father's orders, she had hovered at the top of the stairs during Glen's brief conversation with the Menconis. What she had heard was her hero being as nasty and angry as she could remember. Even more than his tears the night before, this brought home the scope and depth of his anguish. The night before! Ellie had been nearly as distracted as Glen today at school, thinking about sharing the bed with her brother. It had been wonderful! Oh, she was tired because of all his tossing and turning, but it was worth it. The things he had said about her still made her tingle to think about them. Lying tight up against his body had made her an addict in just one night. He had made her believe he liked her body. Some of his sexy comments had her nearly burning up. Was she in love with her brother? Most definitely. Did she want to marry him and have his children? No, that wasn't it. Did she want to have sex with him? She wasn't ready for that with anybody, yet. Besides, she could not think of making him unfaithful to Julie, whom she really liked. Of course, it's hard to be unfaithful when you're no longer going with someone, and that was what all the heartache was about. Ellie could neither understand nor believe that they were broken up, and had a strange confidence that they would be back together. Right now, her beloved brother was at a low point. Ellie wanted desperately to cheer him up. That was probably impossible, but maybe she could at least distract him. It had worked the night before, at least for a while. He had talked about the gift of seeing her naked. She wasn't quite ready for that, but maybe she could come close. Hurrying downstairs, Ellie made sure no one else was in earshot, then asked Betty "Mom, you know those thong panties Dad bought you - the ones we were joking about?" "Sure. Why?" "Can I, uh, borrow one?" "You're going to wear one of those to school!?" "No. I, uh, want it now." "Now? Whatever... ? Ahhhh. Glen, right?" "He needs a little distraction." "Are you sure that's a good idea?" "Oh, Mom, he's hurting so bad. Last night he made me feel so good about myself, and I want to help him. I'm almost ready to just walk in there naked." "Well, those thongs aren't much different. Um, I hate to ask, but things between you two won't get out of hand, will they?" "Aw, Mom, you know better than that." "Yeah, I do. That's why I sent you to him last night. Well, let's check my panty drawer, shall we?" Mother and daughter went giggling up the stairs, straining to be quiet as they passed Glen's room. Ellie's giggles were interrupted by a gasp as she held of a transparent wisp of yellow fabric that Betty tossed at her. "Geez, Mom. You were right. Doesn't hide anything, does it?" "Hiding isn't the point, Honey. The idea of this stuff is to show you off." "Hmmm. Hope I'm brave enough. Guess I'll look for a short Tee to wear with it." "Got an old one?" "Sure. Several" Betty went to her daughter's room and had her take off her blouse and bra and put on an old T-shirt. Then, she took a scissors and cut it off so the bottoms of Ellie's breasts were just visible looking up from below. Ellie quickly stripped off her shorts and panties and pulled on the thong. "Wow!" Betty said, honestly. That will distract him for sure! Uh, you might want to be careful walking to his room. I'm not sure you want Marty to see you like that." "Why? You think this is too much for a fourteen year old boy? If he's like Dad, I'd love to see his reaction..." Ellie flushed, realizing what she had revealed. "He's a younger version of his father, I can assure you," Betty said with a giggle. Hey, don't be embarrassed, Honey. I assumed you had felt your Dad's hardon with all that dancing." "And you're not upset?" "Of course not. I'm just thrilled my baby can learn about men from two of the nicest ones alive. Three, now that Marty's starting to grow up." "Mom, I never tell you enough, but I'm so lucky to have my family. When I hear some of the crap the girls at school have to live with... And then, poor Julie." "You really like her, don't you?" "Yeah. I just can't believe they broke up. It doesn't seem possible. I just have this feeling they'll get back together." "Well, Honey, there's a lot of hurt to get over first, but I have that same feeling. OK. I'm going to go in and put on the green thong." "Oh, are you going to distract Glen, too? God, I don't know if he can handle both of us!" "No, Honey, but this has got me pretty worked up. Your Dad is in for it later, and the thong's a good way to get him going." "Not that you have to work very hard at it, huh, Mom?" That threw them into a giggling hug. "He's so sweet, you know. The first few times when I danced close and he got hard, he was so embarrassed. It took a long time for him to just relax and let it poke into me. I think he finally believes how much I look forward to it." "I know just what you're talking about. When I was your age, my self-image was terrible. I didn't get the kind of attention from my Dad and my brothers that you do. Anyway, from the first time we met, your Dad practically drooled every time he saw me. Before long, I wasn't slouching any more, and I had bought all new clothes for school. The first dance when I felt that big thing poking me in the leg, I practically came right there on the dance floor. Of course, he damn near died of embarrassment, but I got him over that in no time. Yup, your Dad sure knows how to make a woman feel good. And the best thing is, he doesn't have to fake it." "You know, I'll bet none of my friends ever get to have a talk like this with their mothers. I hope you know how much I appreciate it." "And not many daughters are willing to tell their mothers so much either. It works both ways, Honey. Of course, you know our family's attitudes are not normal. We have to be careful what we tell other people." "Oh, I know. I'd shock the pants off most of my friends with just this conversation." "Well, Honey, why don't you go redirect your brother's blood flow from that tortured brain of his." That brought on more giggles before Betty left the room. Ellie looked out into the hall to make sure Marty's door was closed. Not that she really cared if he happened to see her. Her younger brother was such a carbon copy of her Dad it was almost spooky. Of course he was much thinner, but he would fill out as he grew. He had her Dad's same easy-going personality, too. The only exception was on the basketball court, where he was already considered a hot prospect. She of course didn't have the same adoration of Marty as she did of Glen, but he had his father's way of making her feel special. No girl could get enough of that. ------- Glen had managed to at least look at his books and pick up his pencil, and had hopes of actually getting some marks on paper before too long. The visit from the Menconis had upset him, and he was not happy with himself about his conduct. The most significant thing about the conversation was the fact that Julie seemed as miserable as he was. Part of him wanted to believe she was sorry about what happened. The more likely scenario, though, was that she was upset over the coming separation. He could not help remembering what Theresa had said about getting hysterical and saying things without meaning them. He wanted to believe it was possible, but his rational mind told him it was ridiculous. Being privy to how the Menconis had treated Julie, he was not disposed to believe much of what they said. In the midst of his tortured musings, he felt a presence behind him, then soft hands on the sides of his face, pulling his head gently back into a tummy. It was actually the subtle smell that told him it was Ellie, not his mother. "Hi, Babe," he greeted her, closing his eyes at the pleasure of her touch. "Hey, Flip. That was rough, huh?" "I take it you heard?" "Yeah. Sorry, but I couldn't resist." "'Sokay. I'm ashamed you heard me being such a prick." "Personally, I'm fascinated by pricks." Unable to suppress a chuckle, he told her "If you're here to distract me, thanks. It helped." "Oh, I don't think you're distracted enough yet." With that, she turned his head so his cheek was against her bare tummy. Glen noticed immediately, and opened his eyes to see nothing but skin. His gaze naturally moved upward, and it seemed like there was nothing but skin forever. Finally, his vision was filled by a smooth, full mound of flesh marginally covered by torn fabric. "God, Babe! Distraction, nothing! You're trying for a coronary!" Glen spun his swivel chair around, staring first at his sister's chest. His eyes traveled slowly down across the seeming acres of her smooth, flat belly, then nearly popped from their sockets when they encountered her neatly trimmed pussy accented by the tiny, sheer piece of cloth. He somehow tore his gaze away and looked questioningly into her laughing eyes. "You like? Mom loaned it to me." Almost roughly, Glen pulled his sister down onto his lap and hugged her close. "God, I'm blessed with the two most awesome women!" He exclaimed. "Hmmmmm." Ellie just purred for a moment, then spoke up timidly. "Actually, Flip, it's three women." This caused Glen to stiffen and pull his head back to look at her. "I just feel in my heart that you two will get back together. Mom has the same feeling." "I don't know, Babe. How can we get past what happened, the things she said." "What if her mother was right? What if it really was some kind of fighting frenzy?" "That seems awfully far-fetched, Babe. It's hard to imagine anyone doing that." "But it's hard to imagine all the other crap she's had to live with, too. I really love Julie. I was so looking forward to her as my sister-in-law." That was too much for Glen, and the tears started. Ellie immediately pulled his face between her breasts and rocked him gently. Overcome by emotion herself, she pulled back slightly and raised the remaining cloth of the cutoff Tee to expose her breasts. Then she snuggled his face back into her now-bare cleavage. They swayed gently together with no words for several minutes. "You know, Babe. I hope with all my heart that you never need comforting like this. But if you do, I swear I'll do anything I can for you." There was silence for a while before Glen spoke again, this time in a lighter tone. "'Course I don't have these gorgeous things to cradle your head in." With that, he placed a gentle kiss on the inside of one breast where his mouth rested. Then he raised his head, sucked her nipple into his mouth, and squeezed it gently with his teeth. Her whole body shivered in response. "Oh, shit!" Ellie gasped out. "I'll give you exactly one hour to stop that!" Then she made a growling noise, pulled his head firmly back into its snug nest, and continued the rocking motion. She grabbed his hand and guided it to her thigh, helping him rub from there, up over her hip, onto her side, and across her belly. When she let go of his hand, he stopped the motion, and she hissed out 'Rub.' For several more minutes, they sat as he caressed her gently. Her skin seemed to ripple in front of his strokes. The urge to move his caresses up to her breast was almost unbearably strong, but his little attack on her nipple was already a violation of his determination to let her decide their level of intimacy. Eventually, Ellie piped up, "Guess I'd better get off your lap. 150 pounds could put your legs to sleep." "Awww! She ain't heavy. She's my Babe!" This, of course, broke up Ellie, and it was her turn to cry. ------- As soon as they got home from their talk with Glen, Theresa hurried up the stairs to try again to talk with Julie. Seeing the bedroom door open, she hurried in, already fearing the worst. The room looked like it had never been lived in, and she crumpled on the bed in shock. Vince called up the stairs, and hearing no answer from his stunned wife, he called twice more before walking up. His reaction to Julie's disappearance was irritation, rather than shock or sadness. His tightly controlled world was suffering serious disorder, and he did not like it. It all started when they discovered Terry's drug problem. Then the incident with Julie had upset their normal pattern of sex. Now Julie had broken up with Glen, and somehow blamed them for it. His wife even seemed to be believing Julie's accusations. Where had she gone? And why? Theresa was beside her self the rest of the evening until Julie called, at the insistence of Candy's mother. "I'm safe, Mother." "Wh... where are you?" "At a friend's." "Are you pregnant?" "No. I've got my period." Julie had wanted to withhold that information as torment, but relented at her mother's distressed tone. "How long will you be gone?" "Forever. That's not my home any more." "WHAT? You can't mean that. Your nice room. All your nice clothes!" "I have all my clothes. What's left are your clothes." "But the stuff you wear to school." "I never wore any of that to school. I changed before I got there." "But... but why?" "You made me buy them. They're not High School clothes. I was ashamed to wear them." "Ashamed? But they were expensive!" "Enough about the clothes. I'll call once in a while to let you know I'm OK. Bye." "Wait... wait! We... we talked to Glen tonight." Theresa thought Julie had hung up, but after a long pause, she asked "Why?" "We were trying to find out what was wrong with you." "Well, now you know. Thanks to you, I drove him off." "What do you mean, thanks to me?" "Please, Mother. You made me have to fight like that. Then you made me be away from him for college. What did you tell him?" "That you didn't mean what you screamed at him. I... I told him how we sometimes fight, and it was all just the anger." "And what did he say?" Theresa could not bring herself to respond, but Julie insisted. "Mother, tell me right now!" "He... he didn't believe us. He said it was crazy - th... that no one would really act like that if they didn't mean it. Julie, I..." Theresa heard one sob on the line, then the dial tone. If Theresa was frantic before the call, she was devastated afterward. Vince's irritation grew as he saw any hope of normalcy, especially including sex with his wife, becoming more remote. He was, in fact, becoming concerned over her mental state. She was always confident and assured, secure in the knowledge that she had the world figured out. Even Terry's addiction had not dented her certainty. Julie, however, seemed to have shaken her mother to the core. The evening really went to Hell when he asked Theresa who Julie's friends were. She returned a long blank stare, then disintegrated into sobs. Not knowing her daughter's friends hit her as the ultimate indictment of her parenting, on top of a growing flood of accusations. ------- The call to her mother had done nothing to make Julie feel better. She wished she had not heard about the conversation with Glen. It only reinforced the worst of her fears. Only that day had she allowed any hope for reconciliation to creep in, and that news pushed it farther away. Having slept over at Candy's house numerous times, Julie was surprised to find the rearrangements they had made on her behalf. The two brothers had been moved to a partially finished room in the basement, the sister had a room by herself, and Candy and Julie would share a room with twin beds. On top of all the other emotional attacks she had suffered, the love they were showing her was almost overloading her. Wrung out emotionally and physically, she collapsed in bed and fell into a deep sleep. Julie seemed unable to sleep more than an hour without waking from a dream. After the second disturbance, Candy squeezed into the small bed with her friend and gentled her back to sleep. ------- Chapter 4 Anticipating her brother's sleeping challenge, Ellie was more than willing to join him in bed again. She had kept on her same outfit, just pulling on a long T-shirt for additional modesty until bedtime. Betty had given her daughter some instructions before she joined her brother, and those instructions had left Ellie fairly crackling with anticipation. Glen's bedside lamp was still on when Ellie came into his room, and he watched her with obvious appreciation, noticing a definite nervous energy radiating from her. She set down a folded towel she had in her hand, then she took off the T-shirt. In the process, the cutoff one came with it, leaving her topless. Blushing, she picked up the cropped shirt and was about to put it back on when she stared at Glen for a few seconds, then tossed it aside. Her gaze still fixed on her brother's adoring eyes, she then shed the the thong, saying, "It wasn't hiding anything, anyway, was it?" Much to Glen's delight, Ellie stood still and proud for his examination, then turned a slow, complete circle. He was thrilled, not just because he loved looking at her body, but because she was showing more self-confidence than he could ever remember. When she started to strip, he had been about to object, but since it was her initiative, he did not want to make her feel bad or rejected in any way. He couldn't help wondering where else her new-found confidence would take them. That air of expectancy had been with her all along. Even when she was posing for him, she had seemed on the verge of motion. The answer to Glen's unasked question was not long in coming. The light was still on, and instead of crawling in beside him, Ellie threw back the covers and got on her knees next to him. "Remember when you said anything?" "Uh, yeah." "I really, really want an anatomy lesson." Again thrilling him with her confidence, she reached over and unsnapped his shorts and ordered him to lift as she pulled them off. After her show, he was of course rock hard. He fought the instinct to cover up, realizing how important this was to her. "You're hard already!" "Babe. If I wasn't hard after watching you, you'd have to put a tag on my toe." He got a nervous giggle and blush for that joke. Glen felt a sense of pride that he might have done his sister some real good the night before. When she boldly reached out and circled her hand around his cock, he was proud, but had little time to dwell on his pride, as other feelings soon took over. Those other feelings were so strong he was soon fighting with all his willpower to stave off ejaculation. When Ellie touched him, he had instinctively reached out and caressed her ass. As he fought for control, he realized the feeling of her soft skin over her firm muscles was not helping his control one bit. Just as his hand had reached out instinctively to touch her, his eyes had fastened unbidden on her breasts. They were large, and so firm and full, that they didn't dangle as she bent over him, they were just so... Realizing what he was doing to himself, he shut his eyes and turned his head away. "Babe!" Glen almost gasped out, "you'd better stop or I'm going to come all over!" "That's the idea, isn't it? Mom said you really needed it and probably weren't taking care of it yourself." Glen's answering groan was both an expression of his arousal, and an acknowledgement of his wonder at the love and care of the women in his family. His conscience told him getting a handjob from his sister was beyond the bounds of family propriety. Testosterone trumping conscience almost every time, though, he did nothing but enjoy his sister's efforts. In fact, he brought his gaze back to her breast and his hand to her ass, and just let it happen. And happen it did! He was barely aware of a gasp from Ellie as the first spurt shot out and she recoiled. "Don't stop!" he was able to gasp out before speech became impossible. She heard and understood and resumed stroking him as more jets blasted through her grasp. "God! I didn't know!" Ellie said in an awed tone. "Does... does it always do it like that?" It was several more seconds before Glen could answer, then he blurted out "That was the biggest ever," and needed several deep breaths to recover from the few words. He had not lied. It seemed like each of his firsts was more intense than the last. His first form his sister seemed to exceed the first from his mother just the other day. That one had eclipsed the first inside of Julie a year before... Suddenly, at the thought of Julie, he was fighting back sobs, not wanting to spoil Ellie's obvious euphoria. Ellie had torn her eyes from her brother's cock and was looking at his face when she saw the change. At first, she feared she had hurt him, but quickly made the connection with his similar reaction the night before. Not worrying about the goo all over his front, she snuggled up to his side, saying only "It's OK, it's OK." The two siblings lay silent and still for several minutes until Glen gave a big sigh. Ellie read that as a sign of recovery and moved away and got off the bed. She was back immediately and began wiping him off with a wet rag and drying him with the towel he had seen her carry in. "All planned out, huh?" Glen asked with a grin. Ellie managed to look a little sheepish as she nodded while finishing her cleanup. Then, she sat staring at his limp penis. "C... can I touch it when it's soft? You know, I see all these guys at the pool in their Speedos, and it drives me crazy wondering what's in there. I mean, I'd seen some pictures and stuff, but it's sure not the same." Glen spread his legs as wide as he could and told Ellie "Sure, you can touch it. Be gentle, though, 'cause it's tender right now. It, uh, probably won't be soft for long." "I thought it took a while to get hard again." "Not with a babe like you playing with it. Say, Ellie. I believe in fair play. If you want me to make you come, just say so, OK." The smile Ellie laid on him could have lit the neighborhood. "Oh, I'll say so for sure. But right now I'm having too much fun." She went on to prove it with a careful but thorough fondling of Glen's genitals. Her delight in just twirling his soft shaft or cradling his balls was evident. His delight was great, too. Her touch was light and loving, and for a few minutes, he was able to just enjoy it. Inevitably, though, swelling set in. "Can you come again?" Ellie asked. "I think you could make me come ten times." Her giggle at the compliment was priceless. As she increased her stroking, Glen pulled her around so he had better access to her ass, then worked his hand under her, onto her pussy. As soon as she felt his touch, Ellie raised her bottom and spread her legs to give him access. Not trying to be selfish, but wanting to get off first for her sake, Glen kept his efforts slow and gentle. At first, he just stroked and squeezed her labia, keeping that up until he was sure he was well on the way. Hoping to bring her off soon after his own climax, he next inserted a finger, then two. With his palm facing upward, it was natural to rest his thumb on her rosebud. At the first touch, she jerked, but was soon pushing back as if to increase the pressure at both points. Controlling the pace of his hand was becoming very difficult for Glen as he started rapidly ascending to the peak. When he felt the tightening radiate from behind his scrotum, he just held his hand still until he recovered enough to have some control over it. His desire to make it good for her kept him more aware through his climax, though it did not diminish the intensity at all. As soon as he could, Glen got up on his knees. One hand was still between the legs of his kneeling sister from behind. With the other, he cupped a breast and kneaded it very gently. He told her to put her head down, and soon she was in a classic doggy position. Forsaking her anus, he gave serious attention to her clit. With the stimulation from both his hands, and being aroused from the experimentation, Ellie took only three or four minutes to climax, and it was a powerful one. Seeing her almost comatose, Glen did the cleanup himself. Then, he lovingly turned her around in the bed, turned out the light, and snuggled in behind her. ------- The rest of the week passed with varying degrees of turmoil and agony for the people involved. Julie did not return to school that week. Besides her anguish and guilt over the breakup, Wednesday was her heaviest flow day, a circumstance that had caused a few other absences in the past. News of the breakup had not yet reached the school. Glen had said nothing, and through filial loyalty, neither had Ellie. Candy was loyal to her friend, and did not even let on that Julie was staying with her. A number of rumors, some scandalous, some hilarious, began to circulate by the end of the week, but none of those in the know would even comment. Wednesday night at bedtime, Ellie had come into Glen's room dressed in her normal sleep attire and had kissed him goodnight. To his enquiring glance, she had told him "I want to sleep with you again so bad it hurts, and I will. But not tonight. If I do it three nights in a row, I won't be able to stop." Other than in bed, the whole family worked hard to make sure someone was close to Glen at all times, usually Betty or Ellie. This left him only during classes and at night to fight the visions, the memories, and the questions. The weekend seemed to last forever. A trip to the cabin helped, and a dip in the still-chilly lake added a much-needed adrenalin charge. Julie had been to the cabin with them the previous summer, though, and the memories made Glen's nights long and tortuous. Julie came back to school on Monday, and by third hour, everyone knew. The next few days were the hardest of Glen's young life, torn apart by conflicting emotions. He and Julie did not talk and avoided each other at school. On one hand, he realized how much he loved her. On the other, he was horrified by her outburst, and deeply wounded by the things she had said in anger. He had no concept of how spite and hyperbole were just standard fighting weapons in her family. He believed she meant what she had screamed at him and he was devastated. He read her words as a rejection of him and assumed she never wanted to speak to him again. That week also provided some startling and disgusting examples of human nature. By noon on Tuesday, he had been approached by three girls, two of them supposed friends of Julie's. They had blatantly campaigned to take her place. One had offered to dump her current Prom date to go with Glen. He was still sitting in his accustomed trance-like state in his last classroom of the day when Candy walked in. "Not you, too, Candy. I thought you were a better friend than that," Glen greeted her angrily. "Wh... what do you mean?" "Aren't you here to volunteer to be my new girlfriend, like all the others?" "You mean... Oh, God, no. I'd never do that to Julie." Glen dropped his face in his hands for a few moments, then looked sheepishly at Candy. "No, I guess I knew you would never. But I'm not sure I know anything about girls anymore. Not after..." "Glen, Julie's so sorry about that it's practically killing her. You've got to talk to her!" "About what? She made it pretty clear what she thinks of me." "But she didn't mean it! She has this terrible temper she tries not to let anyone know about. And her family! They yell and scream and say things at each other all the time. It's... it's just fighting, trying to win. If they meant even part of that stuff, they could never live together." "Yeah, Mrs. Menconi tried to tell me that the other night. I didn't believe it. I still don't believe it. If it's true, why hasn't she tried to talk to me." "That's complicated. Did you know she's living with us?" "No, how would I know? For how long?" "Says she's never going back. Look Glen, the day before she blew up, she just had the big argument in the afternoon. You knew about that, right? Well, when you dropped her off, something else really terrible happened. She won't even tell me what it was. On top of that, she had PMS, and you know how that is for her. You know how much she feared you going off to school without her? Well, when it was final, she couldn't handle it." "But the things she said..." "And she honestly doesn't even remember most of them. I believe her about that." "Well, I remember them. Every one of them. I wake up from nightmares hearing them again and again." "But she loves you, and I think you still love her. Do you know she talked about killing herself Monday afternoon? She couldn't see any other way. She can't live with her parents any more, and then you were gone. I still worry about her - a lot. Did you see how thin she looks? Did you see the bags under her eyes? Glen, you two have got to get back together!" "Candy, she has to come to me. She broke it off - it wasn't my idea." "I don't know why, but she can't. I guess she's afraid you won't believe her. Her mother told her what you said, and she cried for hours. And maybe she's punishing herself, too." "For what?" "For losing it. I've known her since third grade. You can't believe how hard she has tried to keep that side of her secret." "Well, if she went off on me like that again, I couldn't take it." "This is crazy, Glen! You two belong together, but neither will make the first move. What will it take?" "She has to talk to me, Candy." ------- By the end of that second week, Glen had reconciled himself to the end of their relationship. It hurt deeply, but fear of a reappearance of that unsuspected side of her counterbalanced some of the hurt. Besides, if that was how she felt about him, there was no way they could get back together. He knew what Theresa and Candy had said about not meaning those things, but he could not bring himself to believe them. In his family, no one could ever do something like that just to win a fight. He was convinced they were making it up out of loyalty to her. It still felt like a physical blow every time he recalled the things she had screamed at him. He could not imagine living with that threat for the rest of his life. The dissolution of the ideal couple was, of course, the buzz of the whole school, and that was very hard to take. It almost brought him to tears just to see her walking down the hall between classes. Friday, Betty called their family doctor and got him to prescribe a mild sleeping tablet. Feeling totally exhausted by then, Glen promised he would take one that night. ------- After three nights without sleep, Julie had reached a decision. Her anguish at their breakup was real, and she was suffering sincere heartache. Glen had become the center of her world, and she could not imagine being without him forever, or even during the next school year. At the same time, Julie was a product of her environment. This was a battle of wills, something she had been through constantly since first awareness. Her parents were always the people closest to her, and she would use any weapon in her battles with them. Now, Glen was the closest, and this was a battle. The next morning it was time to start her pills again. Instead, she flushed it down the toilet, a pattern she continued from there on. It seemed impossible, now that they were broken up, but somehow, she would get Glen to get her pregnant. No way did she want a baby at her age, but she could not stand the thought of losing the battle and losing Glen. If it took a baby to hook him, that's what she would do. There was no thought of what it would do to his plans, his scholarship, or his psyche. There was actually very little thought at all, just need and desperation. Once she made the decision to get pregnant, Julie had to figure out how she could manage it. The obvious answer was that she had to get back together with Glen, but it wasn't that easy. She was pretty sure how Glen felt, especially after what her mother had told her. Even if she humbled herself and apologized, she was not sure if he would take her back. The second weekend after the breakup she would be ovulating. She started to screw up her courage to approach him then. Mother's Day was the second Sunday after the breakup, time for the Voss family's annual trip to Glen's paternal grandmother's home. When he begged off, the rest of the family was happy to go without him, as he was a social liability in his present state. Julie and Glen had several friends in common, and she found out about his weekend home alone. With mixed glee and apprehension, she realized that this was her perfect chance. By this time, she had worked herself into such a state that nothing mattered but getting him back. In her tortured mind, the only way to accomplish that and to keep him from going away was to get pregnant. ------- The Friday night of Glen's weekend alone, Julie got Candy to drop her off at Glen's house at about 2:00 am. She got in using a key he had once given her. She stripped in the hallway and stepped quietly into his room, seeing him sound asleep. She had no way of knowing about the sleeping pill; that knowledge would have eased her mind considerably. Quivering with both desire and fear, she carefully pulled the covers from him and sat on the bed. He was laying on his side facing her, toward the middle of his queen bed. She opened the fly on the shorts he wore at night and fished out the organ she loved so much. She was betting everything that he could not resist when presented with her naked body, ready for sex. At first, Julie just held Glen's limp member. At the last minute, she was struck by concern over how unexpected fatherhood would affect him. There was not a shred of doubt he would do the honorable thing and marry her. It would cost him his swimming future - would he hate her for that? No, he would think it was his fault as much as hers. She knew he had always felt a little guilty about their intimacy, anyway. Of course, he would never know about her stopping the pills. That was now a secret she would have to take to her grave. Glen's body always turned Julie on. Kneeling beside him with his limp penis in one hand, she could not resist caressing the thick, smooth muscles of his stomach and his thighs with the other. Sometimes, she could feel dampness in her panties just from looking at him. Now, between touching him and thinking about her next move, she was quickly lubricated and ready. Still, there was hesitation at the enormous consequences of what she was about to do. She would be surrendering her best years and her college degree to motherhood. She would be trapping the man she loved into marrying her. There was no doubt in her mind that she would get pregnant if she fucked him. She was just about to get up and leave the house when the decision was taken from her - Glen's cock began to swell in her hand. His cock had always had a magical attraction for her, and their long separation had only strengthened the magic. Any thought of leaving was immediately abandoned, and she began stroking him gently, hoping to bring him to full erection without waking him. Julie's plan for seduction had not been very detailed when she entered the house. Just her presence with any amount of exposed flesh had always been enough to trigger the urges in Glen. Now, she did not know how to proceed. If he awoke, there was a chance he would kick her out, and that would ruin everything. From their mutual friends, she knew that he believed she meant the things she screamed at him in the midst of her rage. How could he even think that? Didn't he understand those were just fighting words? The important thing was to get his sperm into her womb. If she could get him into herself and get him to come without waking, she would accomplish her mission, no matter what else happened. Of course she wanted reconciliation, but she would take a marriage of obligation and work the rest out later, if that's all she could get. Already seated on the bed in front of Glen, Julie carefully turned around with her back to him. She wanted to keep contact with his cock so he didn't lose his erection, but she did not want any other body contact if she could help it, as that might awaken him. His legs were bent as he lay on his side, so she had to bend, as well, meaning her legs were actually off the edge of the bed. She managed to contort herself into the right position with his cock lined up perfectly with her dripping entrance. It was a feat worthy of a skilled acrobat, though Julie had no particular athletic talent. By raising her top knee and reaching between her legs, she was able to keep stimulating him as she eased him between her lower lips. It took a lot of patient, small motions, and progress was agonizingly slow, but after several minutes, he was fully embedded. Sweating from exertion, with the leg she held up quivering from the strain, she began moving her ass back and forth as much as she dared while stroking and kneading his balls with the hand between her legs. When she felt Glen entering her, memories of all their wonderful unions flooded Julie's mind. All her pangs of conscience disappeared, replaced only by desire. She wanted to pound back against him, but was afraid that would wake him. She needed to come in the worst way, but tried to quell that urge and concentrate on her main objective. Unable to get very much motion against him, after a few minutes she began to worry that she would not get him to ejaculate, and her mission would fail. Just before Julie panicked, she remembered him raving about how her vaginal muscles always drove him over the edge whenever she came. Frantically, she somehow balanced herself and got her other hand working on her clit while keeping up the thrusting motions and the kneading of his balls. Exhaustion and cramping became real concerns, but the eroticism of the situation was having the desired effect, and it was a race between orgasm and collapse for Julie. Getting off was always quite easy for her, and she was very aroused even before she inserted him. She succeeded in driving herself into a very hard come, using every ounce of willpower left to her to keep from screaming out or handling his testicles too roughly. As she convulsed and shuddered, she felt him let loose and blast a huge pent-up load deep into her belly. Arousal, relief, weariness, and a welter of emotions came down upon Julie as both of their climaxes finished, and she blacked out for a short while. Her last conscious thought was of the new life she was certain had just started within her. Nights had been torment for Glen since the breakup. For the first several, he really did not sleep much at all. With the pill, sleep became possible, but the dreams were almost endless, and tortuous. His lovely Julie filled the dreams, usually out of his reach or ignoring him. She would look her best, and be talking and laughing with her friends. Occasionally, he would suddenly be with her, but she would be raging at him as she had in the car. Whether removed from him or angry at him, in his dreams, he could never have her. At last, Glen had a different dream about Julie. They were in bed. He was behind her and he was fucking her. He had not even masturbated for days, and he came hard, sending spurt after spurt into her, seemingly never stopping. After coming for what seemed like minutes, his exhaustion threw him back into the pill-aided sleep. Glen never did rouse enough to be sure he had not just had a wet dream. It was only waking in the morning to see Julie in the bed with him that brought home the reality of what had happened. She was still asleep and he carefully moved out the other side of the bed and went to the bathroom where he discovered indisputable evidence of their coupling. Coming back into the bedroom, he first sat in his desk chair and just looked at her. One bare breast was exposed and her hair was tousled - she looked so lovely his pulse pounded. He wanted her so badly! Yet, the memory of her incredible anger was like a chilling flood on his ardor. Shaking his head to break his trance-like state, Glen grabbed some clothes and left the bedroom to shower. He needed to think and that was impossible while gazing at her beauty. It was a warm, sunny morning, and he took a light breakfast out to the patio and just sat on a lounge chair doing nothing. He had been there nearly an hour when Julie came out and sat on the end of his lounger. She had on one of his T-shirts, and he could see that was all she wore, as it pulled up when she sat, exposing her pussy to him. "Why?" he asked. "I want you back," she replied, simply. "That's hard to believe, after all those terrible things you said." Julie did not have to fake tears at this point. Glen's response was what she had feared ever since she had lost it that awful day. She dropped her head and the tears poured down her cheeks. He said nothing, just watching. He could not tell if her tears were a ploy, or if they were genuine. Once, he had thought he knew her well, but since the explosion, he was no longer sure he understood anything about her. With all his heart, he wanted her to be telling the truth, but he was afraid to believe her. After several minutes of silent crying, Julie lifted her her head and spoke to him. "Glen, Honey, I love you with all my heart. I didn't mean anything I said. I was terrified and I just went crazy. I don't even remember what I said. You've got to believe me!" "Terrified? Why were you terrified?" "You were going away and I would lose you." "That's crazy! Why would you lose me just because I was going to school? Didn't you think I loved you enough not to fall for someone else?" Glen was at the point of getting angry himself, now. "I... I... God, I wasn't thinking! All I knew is you were going away, and I would be alone, and I couldn't stand it." "Julie, I AM going away. This is my dream! It's my chance to compete with the best - maybe even the Olympics. I know I can do it. I'd love to coach swimming in college some day. It will never happen if I don't make a college team. A top team like this gives me a great chance." "I know, Honey, and I'm so sorry! I was being selfish. I just love you so much I couldn't stand the thought of being apart so long." "Then come with me!" he pled. "Believe me! I tried, but Mom and Dad won't budge. Honey, if I have to wait, I'll just have to do it. You're worth it." At that moment, Julie hoped against hope that she had not been impregnated, because she actually meant what she was saying. Glen's skepticism was demolished right then. He held out his arms and Julie dove on top of him, her bare ass unashamedly exposed to any watching neighbors. Both lovers broke into great, wrenching sobs, hugging each other for dear life. When Julie began to kiss him heatedly, he picked her up and carried her all the way to the bedroom. Glen laid Julie down and crawled into bed beside her. Instinctively, they turned toward each other and resumed their desperate kiss from out on the patio. When they broke for breath, Julie tossed off her T-shirt, then unfastened and removed his pants. He shed his own shirt, and when they were naked, she lay on top of him and hugged with all her might. "Honey, I've missed this so much. I can't stand to be without it ever again. I can't tell you how sorry I am about what I did!" Julie's voice fought through the sobs that had started again." "Baby, that's something we have to try to forget," Glen told her tenderly. "No, I don't ever want to forget it. I can't afford to. It's... it's a scary part of me I will have to fight my whole life. I don't want it to ever come between us again." What Julie did next was completely spontaneous. Feeling that Glen had hardened beneath her, she wriggled into position and impaled herself before telling him "Honey, I want to do something very hard for both of us. I want you to tell me everything that I screamed at you." "Julie, no! That's not the way to put it behind us!" "But it will always be with us. I need to be reminded what a monster I have inside me - how hard I have to work to never let it out. I was telling the truth, Darling. I don't remember most of what I said. And this," and she wriggled sensuously against his embedded cock, "will let you know what I really think of you, not the awful words." "Oh, Sweetheart, I can't say those things." "Don't you remember them?" "Oh, God! I could never forget them!" "Then you have to tell me! They hurt you terribly, and I have to experience that hurt, too. I have to know just what I did to you." "But I don't want to hurt you! Ever!" "I know you don't, Lover, but I need this. Part of it is punishment. But mostly, I need to be reminded. I... I a remember few things. I told you you were taking the scholarship because you were tired of me. I said I must be just a high school fling." Julie saw him wince at the words, and it brought more tears to her eyes. She replayed two more things she remembered, then "What else did I say?" Even though greatly distracted by the way Julie was moving atop him, Glen started reciting the words that had haunted his nightmares for two weeks. He said them in a soft, flat voice, but it looked like he had slapped her full force every time. After three accusations, he had to stop. "Baby, I can't do this to you. I love you too much!" "Honey, you have to. I hurts! A lot! But I have to know. If you don't tell me, it will be a terrible secret between us forever." Reluctantly, Glen resumed. After a few minutes, Julie could feel Glen's cock shrinking within her. She needed to keep him aroused, so she sat up atop him and reached behind her back. That was the first of several more times they made love that weekend. She at first wanted to suggest condoms, but she would have had to admit what she had done. If she refused him, she might lose what she had gained. Now, she was hoping against hope that she would not take. During a break in their love-making, Julie tearfully explained to Glen how things were at her house: how everyone fought for control; how words were used as weapons; how her anger had been something she had to fight all her life. She pled with him not to hate her because of her rage. She assured him over and over that she did not mean her horrible words, that in fact, she could hardly remember them. He was still concerned and disturbed, but believed what she said, and resolved that he could live with her anger for the joy of having the rest of her. ------- When the rest of Glen's family returned Sunday night, he and Julie stood waiting for them in the kitchen, arms around each other. Ellie was the first one in from the garage. Seeing Julie, she let out a shriek, wrapped her in a strangling hug, and watered her liberally with her tears. Julie returned the hug with equal fervor. The general hugging and crying among all of them went on for several minutes. ------- Julie and Glen had reunited in time for the Prom, adding a compelling romantic chapter to the love story of the year at their school. Despite being bright and perceptive, Julie was in the full bloom of sexual maturity, and she was madly in love in a fairy tale setting. Somehow, her unconscionable deception became part of the fairly tale, and the baby she was now sure was growing within made her and her beloved into an idealized little family-to-be. Guilt had no chance against the stars in her eyes. The fact that she no longer had a home only heightened Julie's fixation on her 'family.' Living at Candy's was not a long-term solution, and going back to her parents home was beyond discussion. Her entire future - her entire life - focused on Glen. That was all she could see. ------- The reuniting of the lovers led to a moral dilemma for Betty. Julie had called her mother, as promised, and told her she was all right, and that she was back with Glen. As usual, Theresa begged to know where Julie was staying, but with no results. No sooner had Theresa hung up from Julie than she called Betty. After nervously introducing herself, Theresa came right out and asked, "Betty, do you know where Julie is staying?" "Yes, I do." "Is she staying with you?" "No, Theresa, she's not." "Please! As another mother - tell me where she is!" "Theresa, you're putting me in a very hard place. It's hard to even imagine how you must feel. Yet, I know just how Julie feels. I have encouraged her to see you, but she is an adult, and it's up to her. I will keep encouraging her, but that is all I feel I can do." Betty braced herself for the angry blast she was sure was coming, but instead, she heard a muffled sniffling sound. "Betty, do you have any idea how it feels to lose both of my children? I've tried to be a good mother, but I must have failed, somehow. I don't know what to do!" At this point, the sniffles were no longer muffled. "Wh... what does Julie say about us?" "Theresa, that's not for me to tell you. I've come to love Julie, and she trusts me. I can't betray that trust. I am very sorry there are problems between you and your daughter. If I could help to fix them, I would, believe me. I want Julie to be happy, and that is hard without a good relationship with her parents. At this point, it is up to her to make the move." When Betty told Julie about the call, later, Julie was very appreciative that Betty had kept her whereabouts secret. She was not receptive to Betty's suggestion that she see her mother, though. ------- It was the day after graduation that Julie told Glen she was pregnant. She was almost jubilant as she gave him the news, by now consumed by her romantic vision. The fact that she had purposely deceived and entrapped him had been completely submerged by her visions of their wonderful future as a family, fueled by her heightened hormone levels. Julie was hurt by Glen's reaction, which was first total shock, then disbelief. She could not understand why did not share her euphoria. He asked if she had missed any pills and she held up the container to support her lie that she had not. Her doctor's assertion that failures with the pill were not unheard of did nothing to ease his anguish. When Glen broke down and began sobbing uncontrollably, Julie was at first relieved, somehow misreading his tears as tears of joy. When his wailing continued unabated for several minutes, her relief turned to horror as it slowly sank in that those were tears of anguish. She wanted to try to comfort him, but he began moving about the room, turning erratically, sitting, standing, spinning in place, all the while making the most gut-wrenching moans. She wanted to talk to him, find out what was wrong, but she could not get the words out. She suddenly had visions of him leaving her on her own with the baby, and going off to school. This threw her into tears, silent compared to his, but no less agonizing. "Oh, God, Julie!" Glen finally moaned. "I've fucked up everything! Everything I've worked for is down the drain! I should have waited! I had no idea those pills could fail! Oh, God! Oh, God!" 'Waited?' Julie thought to herself. 'He would have waited? Just to protect his swimming? Did it mean that much to him? Did our loving mean so little?' This triggered anger in her. "What are you so worked up about?" Julie asked in a half-shout. "It's my problem, not yours. Nothing's down the drain for you. You're not the one who's pregnant." For the first time since her announcement, Glen paid attention to Julie. "Oh, Sweetheart, it's both of us who are pregnant. I did this to you. I could never leave you by yourself. Besides, I've always wanted to marry you and have children. It's just... it's the wrong time! Oh, God! Oh, God!" This launched a new round of sobbing from him. Julie's anger was quickly quenched by Glen's declaration. This was why she quit the pills. This is what she had to do. It had worked! He was not going to leave her! She was able to sit beside him, now, and cradle his head, trying honestly to ease his anguish. Some of her euphoria was back, making her unable to fully appreciate yet what she had done to him. In the midst of the shock, disbelief, and anguish, Glen focused strictly on what he had done to himself through his lack of self-control. It never once crossed his mind that Julie could have gotten pregnant on purpose. He never once questioned if someone else could have impregnated her during their separation. The idea of abortion brought a momentary flash of hope to his mind, but he was well aware of her strong feelings against it. Three of her friends had aborted. One had later attempted suicide, and another one was still in therapy. He himself felt it was morally wrong, so he pushed the abortion possibility from his mind. Holding and comforting her lover, Julie's romantic fantasies were strengthened. Their struggle to make it and their baby would draw them together. They would be a close, happy, loving family. In her heart, she had always wanted what she saw at Glen's home, and now she would have it. Despite the sobs of her lover in her arms, she was as happy and as content as she had ever been. Unfortunately, Julie's period of bliss lasted only until Glen got his sobbing under control and looked her in the eyes. In an instant, all euphoria, all contentment, and all romantic fantasies were blown away. With one look, fear and smothering guilt took over her heart. The Glen she had fallen in love with was no longer in those eyes - she had killed him. What was left was a man who loved her, but who had a big chunk of his soul missing. Driven now by her own shock and guilt, Julie jumped to her feet and backed away from him. "Glen, nothing has changed for you. You have your plans. Forget about me." Shaking off his tears, Glen jumped up just as quickly and grabbed her. "Julie, Julie! Do you really think I could do that? First of all, I love you and I want to be with you. And I could never duck my responsibility. I am not leaving you and our baby, and that is final. Now, we have a lot of things to talk about." Glen's nobility only served to deepen the guilt which was by now almost paralyzing Julie. She wanted to run far away so he would never know what she was really like, but she also wanted to hug him fiercely to herself and not let go. At that moment, she came very close to confessing her deceit. Somehow, Julie got herself together enough to sit and talk about what to do. They agreed they needed to have everything worked out before they talked to the parents. Between them, they had almost no money, and neither had yet secured a summer job. Now, the jobs would have to be more permanent - they would have to live on them. Both agreed they should marry as soon as possible to keep the time between wedding and birth as long as possible. Mention of marriage brought another blast of reality to Julie. She had always held the normal female image of her lovely church wedding. More than missing her chance at college, the possibility of missing that kind of wedding made it clear what she had done to herself, and not just to Glen. Where to live was a huge problem. The Menconis had a generous lower level with a self-contained apartment and an outside entrance, but that was not an option. The Voss's basement was also generous, but was only partially finished. Both knew, though, that they would be more than welcome there, and decided that was the only choice. It was Julie who decided they would tell Glen's parents right away. She did not even want to tell hers. Sitting down with Glen's parents was about the most difficult thing either he or Julie had ever done. He started by addressing his mother: "Mom, I'm afraid I have a huge 'I told you so' coming. Julie's pregnant." Betty, while not condemning their sexual liaison, had been extremely concerned about pregnancy. As was their way, neither parent showed any anger or made any recriminations. They went through the predictable shock and questioning. Within minutes, Betty was kneeling in front of the couple, hugging them both as she murmured encouragement and tried to suppress the tears. When the ultimate reality hit her, she shrieked, "Oh My God, Honey! Your scholarship!" That threw all of them into sobs. What hurt Julie the most was to see the reaction to what she had done. Anger she could have handled - she knew how to deal with that. What she saw instead was the raw anguish of both parents; not for themselves, but for their son, and for her. Amidst the grief, there was the unstated certainty that Glen would marry Julie and that she would have the baby. It was clear that no other alternative was even considered. Julie felt as low as she ever had in her life. The weight of guilt was so heavy she could hardly breathe. The only thing that saved her was her growing anger at her own parents. They had forced her into this! They had turned her into a manipulative bitch! Sure, she had done the awful deed, but she was just reacting as she always had - the way they always reacted. Sitting in the home of her lover's parents as they tried to quench the anguish with love, Julie thought again of suicide, something that had flitted through her mind only that once before. It was a very good solution. It would free Glen to pursue his dream, and it would be the ultimate revenge against her own parents. With a flash of insight, she suddenly had complete understanding of and sympathy for her brother. She had always been strong enough to fight back, to hold her own. Until now, that is. Her brother had just reached the point of hopelessness a lot earlier. As liberating as the thought of ending it all felt to Julie right then, her love for Glen was deep enough, and she was learning to understand him well enough to consider what it would do to him. She seriously doubted he would ever be able to swim again if she killed herself. She forced herself not to think about it any more right then. Much later, the two couples talked about next steps. Julie took the lead in asking if they could live there. She had never opened up about what her home was like, but now she did. Glen's parents understood and welcomed them to move in, apologizing for the quality of the accommodations. Betty took the initiative and asked if Julie wanted to move in right away, to Julie's great relief. ------- Chapter 5 After gallons of tears and as much love and encouragement as Betty and Alan could bestow, Julie had to face talking to her parents. Glen insisted they both would face them, but Julie told him, "Thank you, but I'm not even going to meet with them unless they agree to be naked." "WHAAAT?" "They did something that I am not even going to tell you about. This is the perfect payback, and I am going to get my revenge. If they agree, I am going to bend over backwards to embarrass them. I hope you will support me on this, Honey." Glen had rarely seen her as resolute, so he agreed. He was shocked at her plan and wondered how he could follow through, but it was obviously important to her. He tried to imagine what they could have done to trigger such retribution. "One question, Julie. Did this terrible thing happen the night before you blew up at me?" When she nodded sheepishly, he gave her a loving hug. "So that was one more thing piled on you that caused you to go crazy at me, huh?" Julie started crying, as she did at every remembrance of that terrible Sunday. When she was again composed, Julie insisted that his parents listen while she called hers. She first explained why she was doing it, again not telling what the offense was. When she finished explaining, she started crying once again. Betty asked her why. "Here I am using threats to get my parents naked as a punishment. I get the feeling if I asked you guys to undress, you'd just do it and probably not even ask why." Betty chuckled. "You're probably right. We're not nudists or anything, but we don't consider being naked such a big deal." "Well, Mom and Dad do think it's a big deal, and I honestly don't know if they'll do it. I also don't care a whole lot. It would be a nice clean break." "Julie, Honey, I know you hold an awful lot against your folks right now. All I can tell you is don't shut them out completely. That kind of hate will eat you up later. They've hurt you. They've done things that seem inexcusable. But they do love you, and they're just human. You'll be hurting yourself as much as them if you cut them off." "I know you're right, Betty. Some of this stuff is still so painful, I just... Well, let's get this call out of the way." It was Theresa who answered, and Julie just spit it out. "Mother I'm pregnant." She had to hold the phone back from her ear for several seconds before she could say anything more. "If you would like us to come over and talk to you about it, we will, but the same condition as before applies." "I don't know what you mean," Theresa stammered, obviously in shock. "Of course you do. You both have to be naked or we won't come. If you decide not to, you've seen your daughter for the last time." "Ohhh, Julie! Why are you doing this terrible thing to us? How did you get pregnant?" Theresa was openly wailing by now. "You know exactly why I'm doing it. I won't talk about anything else until we're there." "We... you mean Glen, too! Ohhh, how can you ask me to be naked in front of him? Ohhhh noooo!" "Call me at Voss's if you want to talk. Otherwise, this is goodbye forever." The hard edge to Julie's voice was scary even to Glen. ------- Her daughter's last words hit Theresa so hard she dropped the phone and collapsed on the floor, sobbing. Vince had not heard the conversation and wandered into the room a few minutes later while his wife was still sobbing. "Julie's pregnant!" Theresa wailed when Vince asked what was wrong. Contrary to her reaction, Vince was irate. "Pregnant! How could she be? Can't that girl even take birth control the way she's supposed to? Get her over here and let's get this thing straightened out." Having a baby was certainly not something he had given his daughter permission to do. Talk about out of control! "She... she will only come with Glen. She... she said they'll only come if we're naked. Otherwise, we... we'll never see her again." Theresa had cried so hard she could barely get out intelligible words. Astonishment and anger fought for control of Vince's emotions as he stood and stared at his distraught wife. "Why in the Hell would she make us be naked?" "She s... said we kn... knew. Must b... be that time in the k... kitchen." "She wants her own mother to be naked in front of her boyfriend?!! I can't believe she would even have the nerve to ask that. If she has that kind of attitude, we're better off not seeing her again." Theresa's reaction was sheer panic. She jumped to her feet and yelled "NOOO! I'm not going to lose my daughter, too!" "She's rejecting us. There's nothing we can do about it!" Vince said, forcefully. "She knows we would never agree to meet them naked. She's just trying to make it look like we're the ones who broke it off. One little slip-up in the kitchen doesn't justify that kind of arrogance." "Maybe it wasn't such a little thing to her! Maybe a lot of things were much more important to her than we thought! Maybe she was serious about college!" Theresa's voice was now steady, and her intensity was rising. "So you're going to blame me, now?" Vince matched and exceeded his wife's volume, and the fight was on. The fight raged on for several hours. There were pauses, but not long ones. Theresa seemed suddenly aware that they had made some serious mistakes in raising their daughter, but Vince would concede nothing and insisted on taking the hard line. As terrified as she was of being naked in front of Glen, Theresa was more terrified of her daughter being totally out of her life. There was no sex at the end of the fight, the episode in the kitchen being the last time Theresa had allowed a fight to act as foreplay. In fact, the fight did not really end. The embattled couple went to bed in icy silence, staying as far apart as the bed allowed, something that had never happened before. Their fights were never protracted. They were short and heated, but always resolved rather quickly. ------- Hardly a word was spoken the next morning as Vince got ready for work. He had been more disturbed by the disaster in the kitchen than he would ever let on to his wife. If Julie had just caught them having sex that night, he could have handled it, maybe even been a little proud of it. He felt tremendous guilt over their role-playing using her. Since Julie's puberty, he had successfully fought the sexual feelings most father's have toward beautiful daughters. The general level of modesty observed in their family was a tremendous help, as was the fact that Julie spent so little time at home. Just like Eve in the garden, his wife had lured him into it. He had been shocked when she started pretending she was Julie, but he went along. One time, and they had been caught. When Julie had exposed herself, he had seen more than her cunt. Even in his shock, he had seen something in her eyes that was never there before. It was a superiority, a confidence that was frightening to him. They had belittled themselves in her eyes in a way that would never allow them to control her again. That control had been slipping away since she started going with Glen. One insane, regrettable frolic, and it was destroyed completely. When Julie broke up with Glen, Vince had thought things might get back to their proper order. Instead, they got much worse. They had not seen their daughter in person in over two months, and he had had to concede that she took all her threats and accusations seriously. It was evident she blamed them for the breakup and was far more disturbed about the college situation then he could ever have suspected. He was so used to her fighting tactics he had just assumed it was mere posturing and power games on her part. Since Julie had moved out of the house, Vince had on several occasions been close to telling her she could go to whatever college she wanted. Unfortunately, she had put herself in the controlling position, and he could not tolerate that. What was loving, right, and best for the family could not override his need to dominate. Now, it had all come crashing down. The realization that he no longer had a family was like a cold hand grabbing at his heart. There was a lot of old-world culture in his upbringing, and family was above almost everything else. Through all the years, he had honestly felt he was doing what was necessary and right for his family. When Terry had fallen into drugs, he cursed the genetic accident that had let him sire such a weakling. Julie was certainly no weakling, and now she was gone. Unless they could do something, all their years of planning for her future were trashed. But what could they do? Vince knew without a doubt that Glen would take responsibility and marry Julie. That would kill all hope of her education and possible career. The problem was the baby. Generations of Catholicism in his family had put abortion beyond consideration. Yet, when faced with the tragedy that was upon them, doctrine offered no comfort at all. They had ignored the Church on birth control all those years ago, after all. Relieved to have some kind of action to take, Vince set about investigating the most discreet options for abortion. The more he got into it, the less he worried about what the Church said. This was the solution! His world could be restored! Knowing Julie was staying with Glen, he called and asked to speak with her. When she answered, he started right in. "Julie, we'll pay to have..." "Dad, the only thing I will listen to from you is that the four us of can meet, and you two will be naked." Julie's voice was harsh and authoritative. "But we can fix this..." Vince tried to say. "No! No conversation! Ever! Except by my rules." Julie hung up before he could say another word. Adversity was something Vince could handle, as he had proven many times. Before, though, he had handled it by controlling the situation. Suddenly, the worst challenges of his life faced him, and he had little or no control. His son was in an institution. His daughter was pregnant and would not talk to him. And sex, the one constant in their marriage, had nearly dried up. The next fight after the kitchen fiasco, Vince had tried the moves that always triggered intense sex. Instead, Theresa turned away in disgust. The same scenario was repeated after several other fights. On a few occasions, he had been able to approach her romantically, and they had made love. The problem was, the situation with Julie gone weighed so heavily on Theresa that it was very hard to get her in a romantic mood. He admitted to himself that the sex had not been nearly as good as their usual post-fight bouts, either. Julie had made a nasty crack that night about their having to fight before they could have good sex. Had she been right? ------- The first night at Glen's house, they stayed in his room. He was kind and considerate to her, loving, even, but the deadness was there. They made love, but for the first time ever, he seemed detached and mechanical. It hurt her more than if he had beaten her. Glen's family made Julie's heart ache for what she had missed her whole life. Betty acted toward Julie like she had always dreamed her mother would act. There were no accusations or recriminations, only genuine concern. The rest of the family took her in just as easily, Glen's younger sister Ellie treating Julie like a celebrity. All of the love and kindness only served to deepen Julie's guilt. She had hurt these people as well as Glen. Every act of warmth or kindness was like an indictment. The day after, they all talked about Glen's scholarship. Both parents encouraged him just to talk to the coach. If he could still have it, they would find the money for the two of them to live off campus. Alas, that was not to be. The coach was nearly as distraught as was Glen, but he could not go against the school's policy. Freshman scholarship athletes stayed in the dorm, and were under strict behavior and academic supervision - no exceptions. Julie was beside Glen as he talked, and when she sensed he was about to renounce the scholarship, she ripped the phone from his hands and told the coach they needed to talk about it. "Glen, just go! You can't give up the scholarship! It's the chance of a lifetime. I'll be just like a sailor's wife. We'll make it. I... I can stay here with your folks - they'll let me." Despite the enticing thought of continuing to pursue his dream, that was not something Glen could even consider. He called the coach right back, and was told the renouncement papers would be there in two days. Over the next two agonizing days, they all hashed over every possible way that Glen could still swim, but it all came down to money. Without that scholarship, it just couldn't be done. ------- Glen did not even want Julie with him when he signed the papers. Afterwards, he went off to the Post Office to send them overnight. As he walked out after mailing the fatal envelope, he was overcome with a feeling of unreality. He did not even return to the car, but walked down the street in a daze. After some two miles of meandering, Glen found himself in a seedier section of town. Almost without willful action, he cornered a scruffy individual hanging around a liquor store, and offered him $10 to buy him a fifth of vodka. Another mile of walking brought him to a large wooded park where he sat against a big tree and took his first-ever taste of hard liquor. When Glen did not return by supper time, the family became very concerned. Alan drove Julie to the Post Office, where they found the car. That only heightened the anxiety, and by dark, Julie was in an all-out panic. Alan finally called the police, only to find out that they were about to call him. Glen had just been picked up from the park and transported to the ER. Having no acquired tolerance for liquor, and having eaten nothing that day, the fifth hit him very hard, to the point of being dangerous. Julie was frantic to get to the hospital to make sure he was all right, and it was a sickening task for Betty to have to tell her that just Alan should go. Not only did Betty not want Julie to see him in that condition, she was not at all sure how Glen would react to Julie's presence. Betty took Julie to the master bedroom and made the shattered girl get in bed with her. She held the sobbing Julie close, refusing to release her when the noise of Alan returning with Glen woke them well after midnight. As Julie slept fitfully between sobbing fits, Betty wondered if some of it was driven by guilt. The question of whether Julie had gotten pregnant on purpose had bothered her since she first found out. She supposed she should hate the girl if she had done that to her son, but hate did not come easily for Betty. If Julie had done it on purpose, she could see the reasons. With each discussion, she was more and more appalled at the hell Julie had lived through. Even such a drastic measure as ruining her lover's swimming career was understandable in her panic. Besides, if it was true, what would it benefit anyone to make it known. She had no desire to quench the young couple's love. She feared it might not survive, anyway, and she certainly did not want to do anything to endanger it further. All the next day, they kept Julie away from Glen. When they were finally together in the evening, they were almost like strangers at first. They slept together that night, but did not make love. Julie found herself almost in a panic that he would never want sex with her again. ------- Julie, of course, knew nothing of Betty's suspicions. That knowledge would certainly have driven her right over the edge. As it was, two events brought thoughts of suicide to Julie's mind again. The second night after his binge, they were all watching TV, when a trailer advertising coverage of a major swimming event on the weekend was broadcast. Glen stiffened in his chair, burst into tears, and dashed out of the house. Julie at first sat in stunned disbelief, then she too disintegrated in tears. She went to his room and fell sobbing on the bed, the guilt so strong it seemed to steal the breath from her. Because of personality and upbringing, Julie was manipulative and volatile, and had done a terribly evil thing. But she was not an evil person and she loved Glen deeply and sincerely. Lying there on Glen's bed, now their bed, she dismissed the thoughts of suicide. Through her sobs, she resolved to do everything in her power to make up for what she had done. She knew she could never make it right. Her only hope was to make sure he was never sorry he married her. That night, Julie acquired a driving force for her life. The carefree schoolgirl was transformed into a committed wife and mother-to-be. What she now considered the horror of her upbringing, she was determined to free herself from. What she had done to her lover, she would spend the rest of her life atoning for. A related incident the very next day brought another breakdown for both Glen and Julie. Glen's younger sister Ellie asked Glen to take her swimming, something he did regularly. His reaction was even stronger than the night before, and so was Julie's. This time, Betty came to the bedroom as Julie lay sobbing. She said nothing, just gently stroked the girl's head and back until at long last the sobs subsided. ------- After giving Glen a few days for the agony of the scholarship loss to dull a bit, they all started talking about the wedding. It was all Julie could do to stay in the conversation as she thought about the dream wedding she would never have. The first time they talked about it, she had to leave after twenty minutes. When Glen tried to go after her, Betty stopped him and explained what she thought was bothering Julie. After she left the wedding discussion, Julie went for a walk, a very long walk. Over and over, she was haunted by visions of herself walking down the aisle of their beautiful church in her gorgeous white dress with the veil and the long train. The vision was like a knife to her heart when she realized it would never come true. She had walked for over half an hour, slogging through self-pity that felt as real as thick mud under her feet. Suddenly, the vision sharpened and she stopped dead in her tracks as she saw herself walking down the aisle on her father's arm. Then, she saw her mother standing in the front row, dabbing at her eyes in joy. There were only a couple of other people around in the residential neighborhood she had wandered into. Only one person noticed when she held her head in her hands and screamed out "NO!!". With her parents in it, her dream of a storybook wedding was ruined. All her girlhood fantasies were never valid, anyway! She could not imagine her father giving her away. She did not want to see her mother shedding tears of joy. They did not deserve that privilege, that happiness! She knew the dream was gone, but it still hurt. It was something that had always been there in her future, and the future was diminished without it. She resumed walking, and it was another ten minutes before it hit her - that's what had happened to Glen, too! His lifelong dream was gone! He was hurting worse than she was, and she had done it! Julie was physically staggered by her realization, and she felt nauseous. As she struggled to keep from heaving on the nearest lawn, the horrifying image of Glen spewing at the curb in front of her house on that fateful Sunday hammered at her already tortured mind. A kindly older woman tending flowers in her front yard had been watching Julie for a couple of minutes and felt compelled to help her out. Mercifully, she did not probe for the problem, just invited Julie to sit on her porch and gave her something to drink. After fifteen minutes or so, Julie felt able to walk again, and expressed her thanks for the kindness. The woman responded with a twinkle in her eye "You're perfectly welcome, Dear. I know just how you feel. My morning sickness didn't stick to mornings, either." The walk back seemed terribly long, but Julie felt much better when she finally got home - she was already thinking of the Voss's house as home. The realization that her pregnancy had not killed the wedding dream lifted a tremendous load from her mind. The dream was already dead because of what her parents had done to her. She could now talk about getting married without the sense of loss she had felt earlier. ------- Glen was quite fortunate to find a job in a grocery store, working the stocking crew on the dog shift. Julie was at first dismayed at his choice, but the money was about the best he could hope to find, and the schedule would prove to be perfect for staggered babysitting later. Of critical importance to his new family was the medical insurance the job provided. The other benefit of the third shift job was that it freed up time for school. Glen immediately enrolled in summer school at the extension campus in town, well before classes were ready to start. He did it almost desperately, as if he was clinging to some small scrap of his future. When he first enrolled, Julie felt the anger rising, but was able to beat it down. She was smart enough to realize that she needed to let him try for his other dream, teaching. Now that Julie was reconciled to the loss of her wedding dream, they were ready to go before a Justice of the Peace and make it official. There would be a reception later, but they wanted to make it official as soon as possible. They got the license and all of the other paperwork taken care of, and planned to do it on the first possible day after the short waiting period. But Julie's awakening to the reality of what she had wrought was not nearly complete. In the few days they had to wait, it became more and more clear how much Glen had changed. At first, she had attributed it to shock, then to weariness from his new work schedule. But after several days, she had to acknowledge that it was more than that, and she panicked. The day before they could do the marriage, she sat on the edge of the bed as Glen returned from the bathroom. It was early afternoon and he had just awakened from sleeping after his shift at work. "Glen, I can't go through with it." "With what?" "Getting married." "WHAT!? Why not?" Part of the change in Glen was a level of volatility Julie had never seen before. It was as if all the emotions he had always kept tightly leashed were now right at the surface. "I... I..." she stammered, stunned at the intensity of his reaction. She had not really thought about how he would react, she was so wrapped up in her own concerns. "Th... things just aren't... aren't right. They're... they're not the s... same. I... I..." "You mean I'm not the same, don't you?" he demanded, trying not to sound harsh, but mostly failing. Her silence and her averted gaze gave him his answer, although he already knew it. Through everything that had happened, the one constant was Glen's love for Julie. He bore all the guilt for their predicament on himself, never once thinking to blame her. When he saw her sitting there, stricken by her doubts and by his harsh words, it tore right through his own anguish. "Julie, Honey, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please, forgive me for being cranky. I... I..." He stopped and moved to sit beside her, putting his arm around her and pulling her close. "You're right, Julie. I'm not the same. It's... it's like a part of me is gone - just ripped out. I don't think I can ever be the same again. WE can never be the same again. But one thing is the same: I still love you with all my heart. And I want to spend my life with you and our baby." "Can... can you love me, even if I'm not the same?" he asked in voice that quivered. "I can't lose you! I've lost so much already. I... I..." Anything more he tried to say was drowned out by the sound of her howling sobs. He had seen right into her soul and asked the question she had been afraid to ask herself. On and on she bawled, unable to think, hardly able to breathe. She clung to him desperately, while he sat confused about the reason for her anguish and how he could help her. When she could marshal her thoughts, she began to realize what her commitment meant - the commitment she had made to atoning for what she had done. This was not the man she had fallen madly in love with. This was not the man she had gotten pregnant to capture. He was a wonderful, loving person, and the same hunk as before, but inside he was different. Could she still love him? She certainly loved the Glen in her memory, but would he ever be back? Just what was it that made him such a different person now? But did she have any choice? What about her commitment? Did she really mean it? Didn't she owe him her dreams after she stole his? What would she do if she didn't marry him? Her desperate attempt to capture him had put them both in a place where they had no options. At least his feelings for her did not seem to have changed. Was not the unquestioned love of a good man more than enough for any woman? But she had experienced the intensity and the passion of their love before guilt and loss got in the way, and she was spoiled. Back and forth bounded her thoughts for many minutes as her crying died down but her frantic hold on him did not slacken. He kept one arm around her and gently caressed her head with the other. His touch conveyed the same love, the same cherishing as always, and that was what made the difference. 'Damn it, Julie, ' she told herself, 'get over it! You've got a lot more than you deserve. You made a vow. Now, keep it. Be the best wife you can to this wonderful man you've hurt so badly. Let love take care of itself. This is not a romance novel - it's real life. Love is what you make it.' Releasing one hand from her grip around his torso, she dropped it down his stomach and slid it inside the shorts he slept in. Whatever his mental turmoil, he was not sufficiently distracted to ignore her touch, and he rose quickly to full attention. At least one thing about their relationship had stayed constant. She could still arouse him at will, and she had lost none of her fascination with his cock. The last several minutes had been emotional for Glen, too. Julie's confusion and upset were obvious, and just added to his already heavy load of guilt over impregnating her. Her move to his penis was unexpected, but could not have been more welcome. He took it as a signal that she could indeed love him, and that he was not losing her. Perhaps it was relief or perhaps it was a symbolic defense of his claim on her: whatever the reason, Glen totally surprised her by picking her up and laying her over on her back on his rumpled bed. She did not have time to regain her equilibrium before her shorts and panties had disappeared and he was kneeling over her, demanding entrance. This was not a kind of lovemaking the couple had a previous script for. His approach had always before been gentle and sensuous, almost reverent. But she was not put off at all. Instead, she picked up on his intensity. She needed him to claim her aggressively. Where she was frightened and confused, she needed his declaration that she was his woman no matter what uncertainty she felt. For the first time ever, he did not make sure she was moist and ready. But no matter, the thrill of his newfound possessiveness had her flowing within seconds. By the time she pulled him past her opening and began pushing against him, the only friction was from the natural tightness of her vagina. The moment she sensed his attitude, Julie had become almost frantic. She started breathing in short panting gasps. Her hands reached for his cock almost spastically. When he was safely seated, she flung her arms and legs around him and whimpered as she pulled herself right up off the bed in her eagerness to merge their bodies. Glen eased them down so she was once again resting on the bed and began thrusting into her harder than he ever had before. And it was just what she needed. She tried frantically to match him stroke for stroke, uttering little squeals of frustration when she did not time her motions quite with his. Timing turned out to be almost irrelevant, though, and the stimulation was there even when they were out of phase. For one of the few times in their sexual history, Julie came from just the vaginal stimulation. They had not even kissed. His eyes were shut tightly in concentration, and her head was turning from side to side as she pounded back at him. They had been joined for a very short time, and her orgasm was fairly mild. Rather than leaving her gasping, it seemed to energize her. She never stopped fucking back at him, and added verbal encouragement, demanding that he go harder and faster. Despite his energetic pounding, Glen's urgency for release built slowly, and after a few more minutes, Julie came again. This time, it was a massive climax and took him right along with her. She squealed and he bellowed, their release echoing through the house. Betty happened to be the only other person at home, and she breathed a rare but fervent prayer that what she heard could be the beginning of healing for the embattled couple. After their gigantic fulfillment, the two lay panting in each other's arms. It was Julie who broke the silence. "Honey, I'm... I'm sorry for acting like a stupid pregnant female. Maybe it's just the hormones..." "Julie, Julie! Your world has been turned upside down. I don't blame you for being confused. I'm sorry if I added to it. I've been trying to be loving to you. It's just that..." "I know, I know, Sweetie," she tried to reassure him while resisting the bile that tried to rise at what her treachery had done to him. "It isn't just my world that's upside down. I... I..." "Shhhh. I don't want you crying any more," he told her. "Please believe that I love as much as ever - even more. We're going to have a child. That's a wonderful thing." "But we'll hardly be married and I'll start getting fat." "Do you think I'll care?" he chided her. She knew he would not care, and just hugged him closer as her answer. How could she have doubted if she still loved him? Maybe he was not the same, but maybe he was even better. Maybe he was no longer the boy she fell for, but this was a man, doing the things a man had to do. They both dozed for a while, content in each other's arms. When Julie roused, she told him "I just want to get married and let it go at that. I don't want a reception or anything." "But... but my folks would like to put one on," he objected. "I know. They would do anything for me," she replied, the awe evident in her voice. "But I don't want anything to do with my parents. Having a reception without them would cause too many questions." What she could not say was that she could not handle the accumulated guilt of all his friends and relatives commiserating over the loss of his scholarship. "Ohhhh, boy!" he exclaimed. "It's bad enough they'll miss out on a church wedding, but..." "Can we go and talk to your Mom?" Julie begged. It was not an easy discussion. In the end, Julie promised they would visit one on one with everyone who would have been invited. She would still have to deal with the guilt that accompanied all that sympathy. But it would be in small doses, and there would be no issue with her parents. Betty had to fight back tears several times, trying her hardest to hide her disappointment. For her eldest to get married in relative secrecy with no public celebration was not what she had dreamed about. She wondered if it was guilt that made Julie reject a reception, and she felt quite sure of it. She came as close as she ever would to confronting Julie then and there. It was her love for both kids and her reluctance to heap further anguish on them that held her back. Given Glen's frame of minds, she was quite sure it would be the end of the relationship. In the end, Betty agreed, and Julie fell sobbing into her arms. The next day, they went to the Justice of the Peace in ordinary clothes and the marriage was official. Over the couple's objections, Alan had reserved the same suite they had used on their first Prom night. In some respects, staying in that suite with its wonderful memories was a mistake. It tended to highlight what they had lost and the things they would never experience. But in other ways, it was therapeutic, as it helped them to reaffirm their love. It was the best sex they had experienced since Julie told him about the baby, and Julie chided herself for ever doubting her love for him. As she had done nearly every day, she recommitted herself to atoning for what she had done to him. ------- For the first time ever, relations between Glen and his sister Ellie were strained. When he had broken up at her request to take her swimming, she had been stunned and hurt. Unfortunately, he was so self-absorbed that it took until after the wedding for him to notice the difference in Ellie. To his credit, he approached her and asked what the problem was. Her response floored him: "It just hurts to think that my Flip is gone forever (referring to her pet name for him, 'Flipper', as in porpoise.)" "Ohhh, Ellie! I just can't swim. It hurts too much." She stared hard at him for a long moment, took a deep breath, then squaring her shoulders and setting her jaw, she began talking. "There was this girl who was dealt a tough blow by fate. She was born tall and muscular, not dainty like the boys want. But she had a brother who kept telling her that she was beautiful, and that she should feel good about herself. You know what? She started to believe her brother." "Then her brother was dealt a tough blow of his own, and this girl found out that he had been blowing smoke up her ass the whole time. Her brother just folded. He gave up on the one thing that had been a big part of both of their lives. He just walked away from it." "No, Ellie! I haven't walked away from swimming! I just can't..." "Well, you sure as Hell haven't squared up and faced it," she spat at him, stunning him once again with her vehemence. "Swimming didn't cause your problems. It's something you excel at. People get their competitive careers cut off all the time by injuries. Yours isn't even ended, if you're honest with yourself." "But with work and school, I don't have time..." he started to object. "Bullshit! I don't want to hear it. Look, I'm so sorry about what happened, but I don't think you should let it make you a different person. It has, you know. I'm sure Julie has noticed it. Well, I want my Flip back, and the one thing that can bring him back is swimming." She quickly stood and left the room, but not before he saw the start of tears. Twenty minutes later, Julie found him sitting where Ellie had left him, staring blankly at the doorway where Ellie had walked out. At first, she hesitated to approach him, but she remembered that she was now his wife. It was a wife's job to help her husband when he was down, and things were definitely not right for Glen at that moment. She had learned a lot from Betty in a short time, and she just sat next to him and rubbed his shoulders, not saying a word. It took five minutes before he even acknowledged her. "Did you hear?" he asked. "No, but I saw Ellie, and she's crying her eyes out. What happened?" "She chewed me out for being a hypocrite." "Huh?" At her amazed response, he spent some time describing his relationship with Ellie, her self-consciousness, his pep-talks, and the changes he had seen in his sister. "So, what's hypocritical about that?" Julie asked. "She said when something bad happened to me and I lost the scholarship, I just gave up on swimming." Learning fast, Julie said nothing, just laid her head on his shoulder and moved her rubbing to his hair. What he had told her would have amazed her just a few days earlier. Never in her life had she experienced that kind of care and feeling from a family member. Since coming to this household, though, she was almost starting to expect it. After a good ten minutes, Glen turned to her and asked "Will you get upset if I show more than the usual brotherly affection to Ellie?" Her eyes widened for a moment, then she jumped up and hauled him to his feet, dragging him almost frantically to the last place she had seen Ellie. Seeing her sitting on a couch, tear-stains evident on her face, Julie gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and pushed him toward his sister. Ellie looked up uncertainly as she heard Glen approach. When he held out his hand toward her, she leapt up into his arms, almost causing him to fall over backward. He recovered in time to wrap her in a lover's hug. Rocking her back and forth, he said into her ear "How about a swim before I have to go to work?" Hearing Ellie's squeal and seeing her apparently trying to break her new husband's neck, Julie made it a three-way hug. As she did, two conflicting emotions welled up within her. Once again she was awed by the honest love that flowed through that family. At the same time, she almost cried at the thought of the pain she had caused them all. ------- Julie was fortunate enough to find a job just a few days after the marriage. The father of one of Ellie's swimming teammates ran a high end furniture store, and was in need of a receptionist. The job did not pay much, but it was a nice environment and played to Julie's strengths. She had no doubt that she could move into much more responsibility over time. All in all, Julie's life as a new bride was far from her fantasies. While the Vosses were not poor, they had little extra, and the room, some food, and temporary use of a car were all they could offer. Neither of their jobs paid much, and they were starting with nothing, not even the benefit of wedding gifts. The meagerness of their existence and the bleakness of their future prospects kept the horror of what she had done in the front of Julie's mind. A hand-to-mouth existence, scratching and clawing for everything, was all she could see into the future. This was not the romantic dream that had made her trap Glen with pregnancy. This was like a bad joke, but every morning when she woke up, it was real. But Julie was also aware of the positives for her, personally. She was out of the maelstrom of her parents' home, no longer having to brace for a potential battle every time she walked in the door. And whether Glen was the same or not, she was not facing four years of separation from him. A huge positive was Glen's family. She now saw clearly where his loving, considerate nature came from. Sometimes, she thought it was all too good to be true. They treated her presence with them as a gift, rather than an intrusion. She, in turn, did everything she could to show her gratitude, spurred on more than a little by her ever-present guilt. The biggest positive of all was Glen. From her confusion of just a few days earlier, she had moved to absolute certainty that her love for him was as strong as ever. Yes, he had changed, and yes, there was something missing. But she could see him starting to grow, as well. His commitment to building a life for them was almost fanatical, and he came to her as his source of strength. It was the Saturday after the marriage that the call came. Julie very nearly dropped the phone when her mother said they agreed to her conditions and she and Glen could come over. ------- Chapter 6 Incredibly, the body blow Theresa and Vince had suffered from the news of Julie's pregnancy was followed by another just a few days later. Their son Terry's caseworker asked to come to their home for an appointment, and Vince left work to meet her there. As overworked and cynical as many caseworkers are, most are able to be touched by certain of their charges, and that had happened with Terry. After a long, appraising look around the nicely appointed Menconi house, she fixed them both with looks of obvious disapproval. When Terry had been picked up for drug use several months earlier, they had the option of seeing a counselor, together. That would have kept Terry from being sent away. Vince had vehemently refused. The caseworker had read the psychologist's reports on Terry, and knew why he had turned to drugs. She had also pled with them to choose that alternative to incarceration in the state facility. Vince, however, declared that if the boy was going to mess with drugs, he could just live with the consequences. As forcefully as she dared, she tried to warn the parents about the hell-hole they were throwing their son into. She knew money was not the issue: they could easily have afforded one of the private facilities that the court would have accepted as an alternative. Vince's strict code made drugs one of the worst of all offenses. As with all violations of his 'rules', he came down hard with his punishment. The caseworker was sure he did not realize just how hard. Even he would not have sent his son to that place if he had known, but she could not get through to him at all. Even Theresa seemed unsympathetic to what might happen to her son. "Terry is going to be released in several weeks," she told the Menconis. Seeing the joyous response from Theresa, she hastened to add "But there is a problem." At Theresa's alarmed and questioning expression, the caseworker explained. "Terry has asked to be kept at the center until he is eighteen." When Theresa gasped, she quickly went on. "That is impossible, as there is a severe shortage of space. Terry has declared that he will start using again and get arrested to avoid going home." "Noooooo!" Theresa wailed. "I don't understand!" "Your son is not an addict," the woman explained. "He took the drugs as an escape, but he shows no classic signs of addiction. He is just afraid to come home." "But there is no reason for him to be afraid," Vince objected. "To him, there is a very real reason, and I'm sure you know what it is," she answered. "The same reason he refused to see you when you tried to visit." "What? Has he been telling some sob story about mistreatment or something?" Vince fired back. "Look," the now-frustrated woman said, "I came here to try once more to get you to try counseling. Terry is a very nice young man, and I would like to see him get a chance at a decent life. If he gets into drugs once more, he WILL get addicted." "We don't need some crackpot counselor to tell us how to raise our son," Vince declared, not backing down the slightest bit. Theresa, who had been mostly quiet, spoke up now. "Vince, maybe we should see someone. I don't want Terry back there again." "No! And that's final!" The caseworker's heart sank. A good kid who should have had everything going for him was going to be lost. There was nothing she could do about it, and she had learned the hard lessons of disinvolvement. She had already invested more emotional capital in the kid than she ever should have. Time to just move on. ------- Theresa had not seen her daughter for over two months, and her son had been incarcerated for almost six months. She was a controlling woman with a fierce, volatile temper, and their household had developed into a perverted battleground of wills. But she was still a mother. The all-too-typical struggles between parents and teens had masked the seriousness of the Menconis' psychological problems. From their early courtship, Theresa and Vince had built their relationship around their battle of wills. To them it was right, natural, and essential that every issue and question be contested. Their fighting style became almost ritualized. Their sex life was triggered by their battles and dependent upon them for energy and excitement. Since intense verbal warfare was their normal way of life, Theresa and Vince never thought of modifying their behavior when the children arrived. The kids would have to win their own places as their battle skills matured. Until then, they did as they were told. Except for their extreme need to control, Theresa and Vince were not bad parents. That is, they provided well for their children, watched carefully over their welfare and behavior, and exhibited love in every way except for the granting of independent choice and action. As a matter of fact, they both considered their control of every minute aspect of their children's lives part of their sacred parental duty. When the conflicts with the kids became more frequent and more intense as they encountered puberty, the parents assumed it was just normal for their age. The fact that Julie seemed to enter enthusiastically into their rituals kept them from developing the proper concern over the effect of their lifestyle on the children. The Menconis' friends and relatives were mostly unaware of what went on at their house. The instinctive secrecy exercised by all the family members was proof that they knew they were different. The fact that the kids very quickly learned not to bring friends home was further evidence. When one parent or the other ended up second best in one of their marital skirmishes, they could always assuage their bruised ego by dominating one of the kids. Julie appeared strong enough to be unaffected, and since they successfully defeated her in most of the battles, they saw no need to modify their behavior. They failed to notice her increasing avoidance behavior. Theresa occasionally bemoaned the lack of Julie's friends visiting the house, but it never made the impact it should have. She was, of course, unaware of Julie's switching of clothes on the way to school. They were totally unequipped to notice the rising resentment in their daughter, and when it turned to panic over college, they were so satisfied with their wins that they missed the critical signals entirely. With Terry, it had been different. Even as a child, he did not engage in the family battles, choosing instead to sulk and withdraw. More often than not, it was Julie who fought for and won the really essential rights that Terry needed for any kind of normalcy. As a typical second child, he was oriented toward appeasement rather than control. Terry's silent rebellion never showed up as misbehavior or poor grades. That would have triggered more battles, and that was the last thing he wanted. His dedication to avoidance turned him into an outwardly perfect child. The enormous load of frustration and resentment never showed up in any recognizable way. The first little pill that a wannabe girlfriend gave Terry brought him a blessed escape from the dark cloud that seemed to follow him everywhere. In typical Terry fashion, he was not devious enough to properly disguise his use, and he got caught. To her own shame, Julie was too absorbed in her romance and her own struggles to pick up on Terry's new habit, and she was as stunned as her parents when he was arrested. Rather than the anger and outrage of her parents, though, she was filled with guilt and remorse. Recognizing his inability to fend for himself, she had committed to being his protector, but she had failed. During Terry's stay at the rehab center, Julie and Glen were the only visitors he would see. Fierce, conniving bitch that she was, Theresa was suddenly faced with the prospect of permanent separation from her children. Worse yet, it was by their choice. Julie's departure from home had planted the seeds of doubt about the way they had handled her. The news of Terry's reluctance to come home brought her face to face with the probability that they had made serious parenting mistakes. More than anything else, the news of Julie's pregnancy had turned Theresa's world upside down. It was every mother's ultimate fear for her daughter, and it had happened. Any remaining complacency about their parenting was totally wiped away. Julie's threat to never see them again was taken very seriously by Theresa. She had seen the change in her daughter the last time she saw her. That Sunday morning as Julie sat naked in the kitchen, there was no doubt she was a different person. The unfortunate interlude in the kitchen had triggered the change, Theresa was sure. And she, Theresa, had started the role play, to her everlasting shame. Actually, Theresa had seen Julie briefly after the blow-up with Glen, but only as she dashed to her room. Since then, there had been only some brief shouts through the locked bedroom door, and two disastrous phone calls. Theresa was becoming desperate to see Julie, just to verify that that Sunday morning was not the last time. The thought of complete and permanent separation from her only daughter was keeping her awake at night. She began fantasizing about all the wonderful mother/daughter interactions that she would miss, until one night she sat up in bed sobbing loud enough to awaken Vince. It had just hit her that she had never had the good times with her daughter that she feared she would miss out on. Julie had avoided all but the essential contact with her, especially since she started going with Glen. Even before that, Julie had stayed at school or at friends' homes as long as possible. The idea that she had driven her children from her was starting to take hold. As desperate as she was to see Julie, Theresa's blood ran cold at Julie's insistence that she be naked. She was not even puzzled at Julie's reasons. She knew that the fatal tableau in the kitchen was her fault, and she even saw the punishment as appropriate. The problem was Glen. How could she expose herself to her daughter's lover? It was not right! She and Vince were free with their bodies in front of each other, but otherwise, she was a modest woman. Over the next couple of days after her midnight epiphany, Theresa wrestled with competing sources of desperation. The longing for her daughter was becoming a physical need, but the fear of exposure to Glen almost made her nauseous. More times than she could count, she went to the phone to plead with Julie to reconsider. Just as many times, she backed away, certain that nothing would change the girl's mind. In the middle of the second night, Theresa made her decision. She would meet them naked if that was what it took. She had come to the conclusion that she deserved it. The idea still terrified her, and she woke in a sweat several times to the vision of Glen staring at her bare body. She also knew it would be extremely hard to persuade Vince to do it. The idea of another man seeing his wife's nudity would be a severe blow to his ego. ------- Vince was blessed with unwavering certainty about the rightness of his own actions. Yet, as a talented sales professional, he was also very much attuned to bottom line results as the true indicator of success or failure. If he had listed the greatest disasters that could befall his children, pregnancy and drug addiction would certainly have been at the top of the list. Suddenly, both disasters had happened. In that strange way that humans are capable of, Vince had always disassociated their domestic brawls from his own personal image of himself as a dedicated father. Family was an important element of the culture in which he was raised, and he took pride in his own family. Within the space of six months, any basis for that pride had been wiped out. In typical Vince fashion, however, the blame fell on the children, not on him. Terry was a weakling - a genetic accident. Julie was an ingrate and careless. He had lost his family because of their defects, not any mistakes of his. To top off everything, Theresa had announced that she was ready to bare herself to Julie and Glen. That had triggered a classic row, and it had been repeated at least once every day for the past week. In line with their new pattern, there was no sex following the fights. In fact, there had been nothing close to sex in the two weeks since Julie's announcement. He could not tell if Theresa was withholding sex as a tactic, or if she was genuinely not interested. Whatever the reason, he was becoming extremely frustrated. On top of the sexual frustration, Vince could not fix the pregnancy problem unless he could talk to Julie. He had the abortion all lined up, but she would not even let him speak of it on the phone. Just like Theresa, he was convinced Julie would stick to her conditions. With every passing week, the seriousness of the abortion increased. Finally, Vince gave in, to Theresa's mixed disbelief and relief. In the midst of her own tossing and turning, she had heard his equal discomfort during the night. In the morning, she was just coming out of the bathroom when he told her "I give up. Tell them to come over." Theresa was a woman with a large sexual appetite. Fueled by the stimulation of their fights, she and Vince had enjoyed a frequency well beyond the average for their age and years of marriage. In the current turmoil, she had not felt the urge. However, with Vince's capitulation, the accumulated need from her lengthy deprivation was released, and she was instantly and intensely horny. Nor was it simply accumulated sexual need; it was far more complex than that. Theresa's sense of her own womanhood had always been secure. She knew she was sexy, and she knew she satisfied Vince, many times wearing him out completely. The wife and sex partner aspects she had no misgivings about. Until the disaster of Terry's arrest, she was always smugly complacent about the motherhood aspects, as well. Oh, she knew there were things that puzzled her, such as the minimal amount of time the kids spent at home, but overall, it was all good in her mind. The lost battle of Julie's virginity insinuated the first small tendrils of doubt, but her supreme self-confidence was even able to overcome that. The recent, apparently permanent, loss of both children, however, had focused all of her attention and her emotions on the motherhood aspects of her womanhood. She felt that if she lost contact with Julie forever, it would brand her a failure as a woman. For once, the wife and sex partner roles were no longer dominant in her mind. Vince's agreement to the naked meeting was a reprieve from the final condemnation of her failed womanhood. Along with Theresa's innate self-confidence came a natural optimism. Slim as the chance of any true reconciliation might be, there was a chance, and it was enough to lift her spirits and her libido tremendously. She was going to see her daughter! They would make things right. Of course, the price was unbelievable: she would have to expose herself to Glen, and if she focused on that, it terrified her. Yet, in a way, it added to feelings that were coursing through her. As she felt her nipples harden, she thought of Glen seeing them popping out. It did not frighten her as much as she thought it should, and it certainly did not make them shrink. Nor did not staunch the oozing of fluid she felt between her legs. All of those thoughts and feelings coursed through Theresa as she stood in the doorway of the master bath. Her reaction was impulsive and instantaneous. She threw off her nightgown and stepped out of the panties she had recently begun wearing to bed. Almost running, she fairly leaped onto the bed, first throwing back the covers. Her attempt to strip the shorts from her astonished husband would have been comical to an observer. "Theresa, what... ?" "What do you think? I need it!" "But... but I have to go to work." "You're going to be late today." This was said with a distinct flash of the old Theresa. Ordinarily, such a challenge would have required a combative response from him, even if only for show. Somehow, he would have to gain at least the symbolic upper hand in the encounter. Such was Vince's level of combined need and frustration that he thought of nothing but a resounding 'Yes!' in his mind. He raised his butt off of the bed so she could finish exposing him, and by the time she tossed his sleeping shorts on the floor, he was already erect. He made no objection to her taking the superior position. There was no kissing, and groping took the place of caresses. Both partners were compensating for a long drought. Predictably, Vince did not last long, blasting into her long before she was even close. She was undeterred, however. She wriggled subtly atop him and flexed her internal muscles as she reached behind herself to tickle his still-shuddering balls. Vince's starved libido overruled his brain and only the sensation from her stimulation got through. In record time, he was stiffening again, never having gone soft enough to fall out of her. When she felt him firm enough, she uttered the first words since he entered her: "Roll over and do me right!" For once, no thought of competition or supremacy entered his mind. He had missed this more than he could express, and nothing mattered but the wonderful sensations. Looking down at her face and at her breasts shaking back and forth from his thrusts, he let her beauty and sexuality carry him away. In a strange way, given the stress around them and between them, it was one of the purest and most straightforward encounters they had shared. Though he had regained his erection quickly, it took a long time for him to build to another climax, and she was able to peak twice in the meantime. They both lay panting for a few minutes, still with no words, since neither knew what to say. He roused first, reminded of the need to get to work. As she listened to the sounds of the shower, the euphoria of the sex started to recede, and the reality of what she had committed to began to overwhelm her. Deciding to put off her shower to help him get underway, she was pulling on her robe, when she again thought of what would happen that evening. A shudder went through her and her knees felt weak. Pushing down the terror with the thought of her chance to right things with Julie, she hung the robe back up, and walked naked into the bathroom. To a quizzical look from Vince, who was by then drying himself, she sat on the toilet to drain as much of their effluent as possible, then quickly washed her crotch before heading for the kitchen, still naked. Now that their shared need had been relieved, the gulf that had grown between became evident again. They said almost nothing, and when Vince found her still naked when he returned from work, a raised eyebrow was his only sign of acknowledgment. For her part, her naked 'practice' during the day had helped very little, and she was unable to eat any of the supper she had prepared. ------- As Julie had insisted, her parents were waiting naked inside their front door when she and Glen entered. Vince looked a little embarrassed but mostly angry. Probably in a show of bravado, clinging to some faint shreds of control and dignity, he stood straight, not trying to cover himself. Theresa looked like she was about to collapse. Her face alternated between a deathly pallor and a fierce blush. She held one hand over her crotch and the other arm tried to conceal her breasts. Glen made a real effort to look only at her face, but a quick glance at an insufficiently covered nipple showed it to be protruding. "Let's go into the family room," Julie said in a flat, emotionless tone. Both parents tried to step aside to let the young couple precede them, but Julie was having none of it. As Theresa walked unsteadily in front of them, they could see her ass cheeks clenching, as if she could hide herself that way. The alternating pallor and blush had moved over her whole backside. As quickly as possible, both parents seated themselves and crossed their legs. Theresa was now able to use both arms to cover her breasts. Once seated, they watched in puzzlement as Julie walked to a little built-in desk in the kitchen and returned with a ruler. As Julie came back from the kitchen and sat down, Vince started right in. "Julie, we can fix this problem..." "Dad, we're not ready for a discussion yet," Julie interrupted him. "What do you mean? Why are we like this if we aren't going to talk?" "Oh, we'll talk, but first, I want to discuss with Glen the genetic outlook for our future children. You two will be our subjects." Julie again spoke in a very flat, emotionless tone. "Now, wait a minute. You are not going to parade your mother around naked like a piece of meat." "Glen, Honey, I guess this was a bad idea. Let's go." Julie was on her feet holding her hand out to Glen before Theresa reacted. "No! No! Don't leave! We'll do whatever you think we deserve. Just don't leave," Theresa begged. "Now wait a minute, Theresa!" Vince interrupted. "We don't deserve to be humiliated." "Maybe we do, maybe we don't," Theresa responded. "I don't care. I just don't want this to be the last time I see my daughter. Do you?" "But that was one time, and she wasn't supposed to see that!" Vince's voice was rising. "But we did it, and she did see it! Are you willing to say goodbye forever to avoid some humiliation we probably deserve?" Predictably, the fight took off from there. Glen watched in shock and disbelief as things escalated. There were a couple of differences between this fight and the many others Julie had seen and fought in. First, Vince's penis flopping around as he grew more and more animated made the scene almost comical. Second, Theresa's huddled posture as she continued to hide herself made her seem less fierce and almost sympathetic. After about ten minutes, Julie looked over at Glen and said "See! And this one is pretty tame in comparison." Somehow, both parents heard her, and froze into an eery silence. Vince glared daggers at the other three in turn and Theresa started to cry softly. Heaving a sigh of resignation, Vince threw up his hands and told Julie. "I give up. Do what you want. If it makes you feel good to degrade your mother, go ahead." "After the things you just called her, I can't imagine you care what I do to her," Julie said with a snort. "That was just... that was just..." Vince tried to protest. "I know what it was," Julie interrupted. "I've done it way too many times, and it almost ruined my life." "What do you mean? It's ruined now, isn't it?" Vince shot back. "That's it. Let's go, Glen," Julie said, once more holding out her hand to him. "No, wait!, I shouldn't have said that." Vince shocked everyone with his near-apology. "What do you want us to do?" Julie gave a long, dramatic pause before nodding her head slightly. Theresa let out her breath explosively when she saw the crisis pass. "OK, Dad, since you're already standing, we'll start with you. Come over here and stand with your back to us. Good, now move your feet apart. Thank you." "Glen, Honey, since we're going to be parents, I thought this would be a good chance to see what the physical prospects are for our children. In my AP Biology class, we had a neat unit on genetics. In most cases, a child's physical characteristics come from the parents, or from their parents. If we have a boy, I hope he looks just like you - that would be perfect. However, you're male, and there's no question your genes came mostly from you mother's side. If our son gets my genes, he could look like Dad." "Actually, our son would be pretty much guaranteed to be a hunk. I mean Dad doesn't have your huge shoulders, and even at his best, I doubt he was muscular like you. He basically has a good build, though. From behind you can see that his ass is suffering from too much sitting and too little running. He is also carrying some extra padding on his belly, and that is causing a little bit of sway in his back. Dad, bend over, please." "WHAAT?" "Bend over! Here's a chair you can put your hands on." Glen did not believe what Julie was doing. She was acting like a different person than his wife. Just as different as that horrible day of the breakup. "This is just too much!" Vince growled as he started to move away. "Vince! Don't! Just do what she says," Theresa pled. Stopping in his tracks and staring at his wife, Vince finally moved back to his spot and bent over as ordered. Julie pushed on one leg with the ruler, indicating her father should spread his legs farther, and he complied. "Dad doesn't have really muscular legs like you, but bent over like this, you can see that his hamstrings and his glutes are pretty well defined. And this is nice," she said as she reached between his legs from behind with the ruler and gently pushed up on his scrotum. "These should hold enough cum for a couple of good shots any time. Does he reload pretty quickly, Mom? OK, Dad, stand up and turn around." Vince's face was flushed when he turned, and the anger shot from his eyes. When her father was facing them, Julie continued. "It's pretty certain our boy will have a nice cock. If he inherits yours, that would be the best. I haven't seen your Dad's, but Betty tells me he is very well equipped. If the genes come down through Mom's side, I'm not sure what to expect. Mom, how about your Dad and your brothers? How well are they hung?" "JULIE!! How can you ask that?" "Oh, come on! I'm sure you must have seen something at least once. Are their cocks as nice and big as Dad's." "I... I... yeah, they're good sized." "See! It looks good for our boy. And this," Julie said as she bounced Vince's no longer totally limp shaft with the end of her ruler, "would not be a booby prize, either. No wonder you get all those noises out of Mom, Dad. And boy, those balls really are nice. Do they get big because you haven't come for a while, or are they just naturally that size?" As she talked, Julie had continued bouncing his cock until it was standing almost straight out. The temptation to reach out and stroke it was strong, but that would not have fit with what she was doing. "Well, thanks Dad. That was very instructive. Ok, Mom, come on over here." Theresa looked at her daughter with the most pathetic look imaginable as her husband sat beside her and tried to cover his partial erection. Tears sprang from her eyes, and she looked like she was paralyzed. "Julie, please!" Vince said, with a surprising note of concern. "Can't you see she's terrified? This has gone way too far." "Too far? I don't think so. And remind me. Who started it that night? Mother, come over here." Theresa forced herself to her feet, still covering herself as much as possible. "Mother, hands at your sides, now!" Julie ordered. Theresa was crying openly, now, but in a series of jerky motions got her hands down at her sides. Her shoulders were hunched forward and her thighs squeezed together. It looked like she had to think out how to take each step. "Mom, relax. I'm not going to hurt you. You've got a great body. You should be proud to show it off. Now, come over here and turn around." Julie was suffering from an attack of sympathy for her mother. All the time she had spent thinking about this encounter and planning what to do, she had anticipated her revenge giving her a thrill. For a fact, with her father, it had. Now, seeing the abject terror and humiliation on her mother's face, her resolve wavered. At that point, Glen reached out to touch her hand, and said "Julie, maybe I should wait in the car." Rather than causing her to go easy on her mother, the reminder of Glen's presence had the opposite effect. All of her feelings of guilt over what she had done to Glen flooded out her sympathy. In her mind, her parents were the cause of it all, and her resolve stiffened. Theresa, even in her distraught condition, was watching her daughter carefully. She saw the change from hopeful sympathy to vengeful determination and launched into full-scale sobs. "Honey, stay right here. This is important to me," Julie told Glen. When Theresa stood before them, Julie had to take her arm and turn her around. Then she shifted back into the same teacher-like voice she had used while her father was on display. "With Mom, there isn't really much of a genetics lesson, 'cause, as you can see, I'm pretty much a younger version of her. I think it can be good for you to get a preview of me in twenty years or so, don't you. Frankly, I'm proud of how good I will look for you. As you can see, Mom has more in the hips than I do, but I'm told women's hips usually get wider from carrying a baby. I hope you don't mind. I don't think hers look too wide, at all, do you?" Julie paused and nudged Theresa's legs apart, causing even louder sobbing. "You know, Honey, it's impressive how well Mom's ass and thighs have held up. She's always done aerobics with those TV shows, and she has always eaten carefully. I guess you could call this just normal sag from age." With that, she used the ruler to jiggle the lower portion of one ass cheek. "And this is something I'll have to watch out for." This time she pointed to the creases in Theresa's back caused by holding her arms in tight. "Just look at her, though. She really has a classic hour glass figure, doesn't she? Do you think I will be fun when I look like that? OK, Mom, here's the chair, now bend over like Dad did." "Noooo! Julie! Please don't make me do that! Glen... he'll s... see my... ohhh!" "Yup, he sure will." Julie was now completely without sympathy. "Would you rather we leave? You've already gone through most if it. It would be a shame to waste all that." Julie paused, and Theresa did not move. With a theatrical sigh, Julie turned to Glen. "Well, I guess we'll leave, then, Honey." Saying nothing Theresa bent over, crying so hard she could barely maintain her balance. Vince was very angry - almost angry enough to intervene. He did not, only because Theresa had fought so fiercely for this meeting. She had sworn him over and over to see it through, no matter what happened. He did not even feel ashamed of the satisfaction he felt seeing her suffer. She had asked for it and fought for it, after all. Now she could live with it. "See, Honey, Mom has so much hair between her legs, you really can't see anything from the front. There's still a lot of hair there, but at least you can see her lips. You never get to see much of mine, do you?" Julie managed a fairly authentic giggle. "Whenever I get like that in front of you, you never bother to take in the view, you just take me." She used the ruler to play with the hair partially hiding Theresa's labia even from the rear. In a move that stunned Glen, she forced the ruler between the lips and spread them apart slightly. Somehow, Theresa avoided collapsing or bolting from the room. "Oh, oh! Honey, I see a potential problem for us. Look at the hemorrhoids she has." At that comment, Theresa shrieked and tried to stand and pull her legs together. Julie had anticipated that, and had her own legs in the way and her hand holding her mother down. When Theresa's struggle stopped, Julie continued in a mock sad tone. "I hear that is very common after childbirth. We'll have to be sure and play around a lot back there before the baby comes. It won't be as much fun if I grow some of those. OK, Mom. Stand up and turn sideways." She almost had to position Theresa herself, so traumatized was she. "It's really hard for a woman to keep looking nice from the side. That's where all the sags show up the most. Mom's got a naturally tight waist, and that sure helps, but you can see the tummy giving up little. No, Mom, don't try to suck it in. Just stand naturally. And of course, the boobs. Time just pulls them down. Heavy as Mom's are, you can see how it could make her shoulders stoop if she didn't watch it. I know you like me without a bra, but I want to delay that droop as much as I can. Now face us, Mom." Again, Julie had to use her hands to turn her mother toward them, and Theresa could not look at either of them. "Besides wider hips and more weight all over, Moms' boobs are bigger than mine. I'll probably grow some with nursing and all, but if I don't get as big as her, I won't mind. I hope you won't. Another difference between Mom and me is the nipples. Hers are much darker, and the darker part is a lot wider. I don't know if the baby will affect that. All in all, don't you think I'll look pretty good at forty? Thanks, Mom. You can sit down." Theresa practically sprinted back to her place next to Vince and collapsed into his arms. When she finally settled down, he asked her rather sarcastically "Is that what you fought so hard for? Was it worth it?" "I never thought..." Theresa turned to Julie. "How in the world could you humiliate me like that. Do you hate me that much?" "Humiliate? That was nothing! It was a few minutes! You've been humiliating me my whole life." Julie had vowed to show no anger. It was an important part of her determination not to be like her parents. "What do you mean?" Theresa looked honestly insulted. "I never humiliated you!" Taking a deep breath to regain control, Julie asked "Did you ever wonder why I hardly ever had any friends over?" At her mother's blank look, Julie continued. "Every time I had someone over, you found a way to humiliate me." "I never..." "Yes you did. You would find something that wasn't right and scold me about it in front of my friend. Or you would think of something I hadn't done, and make me do it while my friend waited." "But why didn't you say anything?" Julie almost lost it at that, but gritted her teeth and waited for the flush to leave her face. "Now you are just plain lying, Mother. What would happen after my friend left." "It... uh... we sometimes had big arguments." "Sometimes? Every time until I quit bringing friends home. And what were the arguments about?" Theresa just hung her head, obviously perfectly aware of what her daughter was talking about. "And Dad, what was your favorite way of showing who was in charge?" "I don't know what you mean." "You just loved to make me cancel my plans at the last second. You'd make up a family need, or some other excuse. I'd be in tears, and my friends would be left hanging. Now, don't try to deny it. It was still happening just before I moved out." Vince had the decency not to try a denial. "So this humiliation is to get even?" Vince asked after a while. "Even!? There's no way I could ever get even. No, this was mostly for that one time, and..." "That was just that once, honestly. We never did..." "I don't care. Besides getting even a little, I'm doing this because I can. For once, I seem to have something that you want, and it feels damned good to be in control. Now, you wanted us here to talk?" "Can we get dressed, then?" Vince asked. "Of course not. I may decide never to see you again with your clothes on. If you want to get dressed, we'll just leave. And Mom, quit covering up your boobs. It's as bad as getting dressed. No more talk until I can see nipples and cock." Vince's face flushed with anger and Theresa's with shame. Both stared at their daughter as if she was some unknown creature. Neither could understand the guilt, anger, and despair that had driven her to this point. Worrying about her feelings and motivations was not something they spent much time on. Eventually, they looked at each other. Theresa dropped her arms and Vince uncrossed and opened his legs. "About the baby," Vince started in. When Julie made no response, he continued. "We can fix it." "Fix it?" Julie queried. She acted confused, although she knew exactly what he was talking about. "As far as I know, the baby's fine. Perfectly healthy." "I mean get rid of it. Let you get on with college. We found a doctor..." "Ahhh. So I take it you've discussed this with your priest, then?" Julie almost enjoyed that retort. "Church doctrine didn't bother you much at the Prom." Theresa had recovered enough to get into the argument. "Just following established family tradition." Julie felt almost as good about that shot. "That was different!" Theresa almost shouted. "Sure was," Julie came back quickly. "You did it without your parents knowing. You did it with a guy you barely knew in the back seat of a car. You were only fifteen. I was seventeen, and we told you exactly what we were going to do. We hoped for love and support. Fat chance." "So you're still angry about that?" Theresa asked. "Aren't you. Isn't that why you insisted on that stupid college - to get even with me controlling my own virginity." "Now wait a minute!" Vince broke in. That had nothing to do..." "Don't make it worse by trying to deny it, Dad." There was a long silence following that exchange. "The problem is the baby," Vince said to break the silence. "We'll pay for all the expenses to get rid of it." "No abortion!" Julie said it with certainty. "But what about college?" her mother shrieked. "This will save me the embarrassment of flunking out of your stupid school," Julie retorted. Vince could not take that and demanded "You would have done that just to get back at us for sending you there?" "Of course I would. You taught me well. Besides, you were only sending me there to keep me away from Glen." "No, no! That's not it at all!" Theresa insisted. "It's a great school, and we wanted the best possible education for you!" "Oh, stop that bullshit! We've been over and over this. I showed you the rankings, and it's nowhere near as good a school and it costs a whole lot more." "OK! OK!" Vince jumped in. "Just get the abortion, and we'll send you to Glen's school." Despite his vows of restraint, this was too much for Glen. He jumped to his feet and shouted, "What! You always said there was no way she could go there!" Surprised at the reaction from the usually reserved Glen, Vince was at first flustered, but quickly got into his familiar fighting mode. "Well, uh, it's certainly better than letting a baby ruin her future." "You people are unbelievable!" Glen was practically screaming, now. "You forced her to go to some podunk little college. You never even considered what she wanted or what was best for her. It was all just about winning, wasn't it? Now, it looks like you're losing, so you offer to give her what she wants, but under your conditions. Our lives are turned upside down, but to you it's nothing but a fucking game!" Afraid to let himself go any longer, Glen stormed out of the house. With the minimal restraint of Glen's presence removed, the emotional level cranked up quickly. Vince said "He has no right to go getting all pissy! He's the one who knocked you up, after all! Go get the abortion, and you'll get what you wanted. You'll have won. Isn't that good enough for you?" Julie had strong moral feelings against abortion and would never have agreed anyway. Now, she sensed that having the baby would be a huge blow against her parents. She had already killed her lover's dream and part of his soul with it. At least she could feel a little triumph for the greatest victory of her life against the parents she was beginning to hate more and more. "No abortion, ever!" was her only response. By now, her mother was starting to panic. "All right. We'll give you money to live by his school if you'll enroll the next year. Is that enough of a win for you?" Head down and tears starting, Julie replied "Glen doesn't have a school. He had to give up the scholarship, and it's already gone to someone else." "What?" her father yelled. "Why did he do that before you even talked to us? We could have worked something out!" "Why would I ever think that you would change your mind? How many times did you tell me there was no way I was going to Glen's school, huh? How many times?" "Yeah, but that was just..." her father stopped himself in mid-sentence, realizing the admission he was about to make. "It was just part of the game, you mean?" Julie shot back. "Glen was right, wasn't he? You never gave a shit about me, just about getting your way. Well, guess what? We're going to be together in spite of you." "Oh my God!" Theresa suddenly shrieked. "You're going to keep the baby just to get back at us, aren't you? So, you get all high and mighty about us, and you're just as bad!" "Of course I'm just as bad as you. I'm a heartless bitch. You made me that way and I hate you for it." By some miracle, Julie had still not raised her voice. Her calmness, determination, and refusal to get angry had completely befuddled her parents. It took a moment for the parents to absorb this. Then, Theresa asked "Where will you live?" "At Glen's until we can afford an apartment." "But we've got a beautiful apartment downstairs," Vince objected. "But your apartment isn't big enough for us to stay away from you," Julie shot back. "I messed things up enough for Glen already. He deserves to have some peace and quiet and love after all of this. I'd like some, too." Hurt deeply by her daughter's words, Theresa sprouted a few more tears and adopted a pleading voice. "But Honey, we do love you. We've always just wanted the best for you. You know the arguments don't mean anything. Don't leave us like this, please. When you're pregnant or have a new baby, you should have your mother around." "Why? So I can be sure to know everything I'm doing wrong? So you can yell and scream at me until I do it right? No thanks!" "Is... is that what you really think of me?" Theresa asked between sobs. Julie did not answer, but the grim look on her face spoke volumes. "Wh... what about a wedding?" Theresa asked after she got her crying under some control. "No wedding. We were already married by a Justice of the Peace." Theresa sat motionless, jaw hanging slack and eyes darting back and forth as she waited for the correction that surely must be coming. Julie was her only daughter. Julie's wedding was to be one of the high points of Theresa's life. There had to be some mistake! This could not be happening! The fit of sobbing that overwhelmed Theresa when she realized it was true lasted so long that both her husband and daughter feared for her safety. It took many minutes before Theresa could even control her breath. Her first, halting words were "N... no w... w... wedding? B... b... but I p... planned... Oooooooh!" "Why didn't you at least invite us to be there?" Vince spat out. "Would you have come?" Julie shot back. When his only response was a stony stare, she added "You did everything you could to break us up. We knew you wouldn't want anything to do with a wedding." "Nooooooo! Nooooooo! Noooooooo!" Theresa wailed. "That's not true! We didn't try to break you up! We never..." "Well, what was I supposed to think, huh?" Julie shot back in icy bitterness. "Now, I realize that whole college farce was just to get even for the Prom. But I never suspected even you two would be that despicable. The only other reason had to be because you wanted us to break up. What was I supposed to think? And don't even try that 'great educational experience' bullshit again." "But what was so terrible about being separated for a few years of college? Lots of couples manage that," Vince said in almost a whining tone, astonishing for him. "Oh, you mean like you two did?" Julie said with obvious sarcasm. "But you're not us," Vince retorted, then seemed to realize what he had said just as Julie pounced. "Maybe if you'd realized that ten years ago, you'd still have a family." That blast from Julie threw Theresa into another paroxysm of sobs. Before his wife had quite recovered her breath again, Vince shot to his feet and practically screamed. "My God! You did it on purpose! You got pregnant on purpose!" It took Julie only a moment to steel herself from reacting, but both parents caught the brief flash of panic, and they knew. "How can you say such a thing!?" Julie said, raising her voice for the first time. Then, she regained her control, and said in a very menacing tone "If you ever even breathe that insane idea to anyone, you will never see or speak to me again! Is that clear?" No one spoke, no one moved, and no one even breathed for many seconds. "Everything is ruined, isn't it?" Theresa's voice was small. "Yes. Everything's ruined. I hope you're happy." ------- Julie left to join Glen in the car. Her parents could not even muster a goodbye. Theresa sat as if in a trance for over twenty minutes, not even thinking about getting dressed. After a couple of minutes, Vince had gotten up and gone to the bedroom to dress. When he returned, he had paced around, muttering and looking frequently at his wife. "Are we really such terrible parents?" Theresa finally asked. "She's just trying to justify her own stupid action," Vince insisted. "She can't blame us for that." "But... but I did those things she accused me of. So did you." "Well, so what. It was our right to bring her up the way we thought was right." "Then, why are our children gone? Why don't they want anything to do with us? Why would it make Julie feel better to do those terrible things to me? You know she got pregnant on purpose just to get away from us, don't you?" "I think she did it more to keep from being away from Glen," Vince opined. "The result is the same," Theresa said with a sniffle. "We did the best we could. We'll just have to forget them and get on with our lives." Theresa looked at her husband as if he was an alien after that statement. "But I'm going to be a grandmother. That's supposed to be something wonderful," Theresa wailed. "We should have known she was serious about college." "How could we know she wasn't just fighting, as usual?" Vince spat back. "That Saturday: when she stopped fighting," Theresa explained. "She never did anything like that before." "Where we pay for her to go to college is our decision, not hers!" he insisted. "Not any more," she said softly, then "We'd better go see a counselor." That was too much for Vince, and he went into a tirade about quacks, and about nothing being wrong with them. For several minutes, he did not even realize that he was doing battle all by himself. Theresa just sat and looked at him. When he finally noticed she was not engaged, he came to a screeching halt. "Will you at least send me to see someone?" she asked in obvious fear. That launched another tirade where he used every known tactic to try to draw her into the battle. Once again, she did not respond, and after a few minutes, he noticed her look of obvious disgust. He stopped shouting, turned and stormed out of the room, telling her over his shoulder "Do whatever you want, if you think it will help." Little did Vince know that he and Theresa would never again have a pitched battle.Last Straw ------- Chapter 7 After the traumatic visit from Julie and Glen, there was no way the Menconi household could return to anything resembling normalcy. The humiliation of her naked exposure still hung over Theresa like a pall, but it was not her worst problem; she was overwhelmed by the loss of her children. In fact, she teetered on the knife edge of rationality. It had been months since her son Terry had been arrested for drug possession, supposedly giving her time to get used to his absence. Julie had not lived in the house for almost three months, either. Thus, her empty nest was nothing new. It was just the finality that Julie's visit had signaled that knocked the supports from under her. Before the visit, she had taken comfort in the illusion that Julie was just being rebellious, and that they would eventually bring her to heel as they always had. Even her moving out of the house must have been just a phase - a typical power play. Vince, of course, helped to fuel her illusion with his absolute confidence that what they were doing was right. Exposing herself to Glen in the utterly humiliating way Julie had insisted on had affected her more than she even realized. Until that moment, she was eager to dismiss anything Julie did or said as just a fighting tactic, not to be taken seriously. Half of her mind was not even convinced Julie was really pregnant. As she bent over the back of that chair with her daughter lewdly spreading her open for Glen to view her most intimate parts, illusion could not survive. At that moment, she knew that everything Julie vowed, she would do. For two days after the visit, Theresa walked around as if in a trance, forgetting to dress or groom herself, and not even thinking about meals for herself or Vince. By the third day, she had become largely unresponsive, and when Vince returned from work, she did not seem to realize that he was there. Vince was completely knocked off kilter by the encounter with Julie and Glen. He had, of course, been very upset by her leaving home, and even more so by the announcement that she was pregnant. The lewd, careless scene in the kitchen weighed heavily on his conscience. But he had been secure in the knowledge that he would put things right and the problems would be resolved. When Julie left, he was no longer able to delude himself. The problems were not fixable. He could not put things back the way they were supposed to be. Most distressing of all was the possibility that he, along with Theresa, might be the direct cause of all the problems. That possibility, however, his ego would not allow him to accept. Maybe Theresa might be partially to blame, but certainly not him. Julie was just willful and rebellious, and Terry was just weak. It was a cross he had to bear, but nothing that could be blamed on him. Then, Theresa started to fall apart. At first, he tried to correct things the usual way, by verbal assault. When she just looked at him with an expression of disgust and some fear, he was completely lost. If she would not engage him, how was he to communicate? How could he ever get her out of her senseless funk? When he came home Wednesday evening and found her totally withdrawn into her own world, he finally became alarmed. He loved his wife. But much of that love was based on the kind of partner she was: strong, resolute, passionate, even fierce; a sparring partner, in many respects. Who was this pathetic creature wandering around the house unkempt and unresponsive? For once, Vince seemed to realize that he was up against something he had no chance of fixing. He got her looking relatively presentable, called their family physician's emergency line, and took her to the hospital. Even before their doctor arrived, the staff Psychologist was interviewing Vince, since Theresa could tell her nothing. When the doctor arrived, they quickly booked Theresa into the psyche ward, another severe blow to Vince's tightly controlled world. When Theresa was completely sedated so there was no chance of communication, Vince wandered from the hospital in a daze. If the psychologist had been a little less focused on Theresa, she might have decided that Vince was not fit for the real world, either. Alcohol as an escape did not fit with Vince's personality. Alcohol led to loss of control, and that was something he avoided at all costs. There was a small amount of hard liquor in the house, and he was hardly in the door when he set about to demolish it. Loss of control was no longer an issue - it was all gone. Escape became the primary need for that night. ------- It was a little after 11:00pm and Glen was getting ready to go to work when the phone rang. He hurried to pick it up so no one would be awakened. After his quiet 'Hello', a slurred voice came back at him. "Lemme talk 'a Jooool." "Mr. Menconi?" Glen asked in disbelief. "Julie's sleeping." "Waal ge' 'r ub!" "No, I don't think so," Glen replied sternly. "It's too late, and I don't think she would want to talk to you in your condition. Why are you calling?" "Wife in hop'l. B... brayyy (hic) down. Hope sheee s... sa'fied." "And you think this is Julie's fault?" Glen barked, now thoroughly pissed - so angry he could not even consider his natural sympathy for someone ill. "Let me tell you!" Glen spat out, "if it's anyone's fault, it yours. You abused Julie for years until she couldn't take it any more." With that he slammed down the phone. Vince, either because of a flash of good sense or a total lack of coordination, did not call back. If he had, he most likely would have revealed the secret of Julie's treachery. Glen was left with a tough decision, but he only deliberated for a moment. He woke Julie as gently as he could, and told her about the phone call. He urged her not to try to call her father, and she did not want to at any rate. He apologized that he had to hurry off to work, and promised to talk about it when he came home in the morning. The next day, Julie would feel remorse about her reaction, but that night, her hatred was so strong that she felt a wave of satisfaction over her mother's condition and her father's reaction. They were getting a little taste of the emotional turmoil she had lived with for all those years. She fell back to sleep very quickly. In the morning, when Glen came home from his shift, he spent an hour talking with Julie about her mother, then they both told Betty about the situation. Both Glen and Betty counseled Julie against the hatred she admitted to feeling against Theresa. She became a little tearful as they told her how unlike her it was to have those feelings. They both complimented her on her loving and considerate nature, and asked her to try to give her mother the benefit of the doubt. There was no way she could tell them that much of the hatred was because she was driven to betray the one she loved the most. Vince did not try to call Julie again, nor did he hit the bottle heavily again. When he became functional, fairly late the next day, he went to the hospital to try to find out as much as he could about his wife's condition. Their family M.D. considered Dr. Julia Waxman the best psychiatrist in town, and had managed to get Theresa into Dr. Waxman's extremely heavy schedule. She only needed Vince's approval for the first visit to take place. Since he had already agreed to let her see a counselor, it would have been hard to say 'no' at that point. Besides, he was honestly concerned about Theresa's health. Because it was referred treatment, it was covered under their health insurance. A fairly strong anti-anxiety medicine had brought Theresa out of her near-catatonic state, and she was able to converse intelligibly. Still in her hospital gown, but with a robe and slippers that Vince had brought, she went with Julia to an interview room on the same floor. Julia did not use the same introductory technique with all patients. In fact, she never planned out ahead how to start a session. With Theresa, she used an approach that had proven effective with hospital or institution patients. "Tell me why we're here talking." The early objective was to fill in as much background information as possible as quickly as possible. Given proper encouragement, patients would generally talk first about the things that bothered them the most. This allowed Julia to hone the efficiency of her questions, rather than the 'saturation bombing' approach, which could take several sessions to get to the heart of the problem. Theresa seemed almost desperate to tell someone what was on her heart. What was on her heart was the pain of rejection by both of her children, and the growing certainty that she and her husband had caused it by selfishness, inattention, brawling, and the excessive need to control. She quickly told Julia the source of her despair, but then dove right into a recitation of the things she had done wrong. After letting her talk for about twenty minutes, Julia asked "If your actions were driving her away, why didn't you change?" "I... we... thought it was just normal teenaged struggles. We... we... fight a lot, and it gets pretty heated." "Why were you so insistent on your college?" Julia asked rather suddenly. "Well, we had such a wonderful time there, and we wanted that for her, and..." Theresa's voice trailed off. Taking a chance so early in their interaction, Julia demanded "What was the real reason?" After a huge sigh and the appearance of some tears, Theresa admitted "It was payback for getting her way about sex after the Prom. She was convinced it was to break her up with Glen." "Didn't you realize that's what she thought? Didn't she accuse you of that?" "Well, yes. But... but we thought it was just fighting. And we... oh, God! We weren't going to give up for anything. We couldn't let her win another big one." Saddened and a little sickened by the woman's admission, Julia was still impressed that Theresa was so honest. It was a stage that was rarely reached so quickly. It was clear that a massive change had already occurred in the broken mother. "What do you think happened with your son Terry?" Julia asked after a lull in the conversation. They had been talking for nearly an hour, and Theresa had managed to avoid all-out crying, even when reciting the indignities they had heaped on Julie. But at the mention of Terry, she disintegrated, sobbing uncontrollably. Julia wondered at Theresa's reaction, but decided to say nothing and let Theresa work through her upset. After a few minutes, Theresa spoke. "Terry was not a fighter. He was a super-bright, gentle boy. Vince used to mock him because he wouldn't fight. Julie tried to stand up for him, but he couldn't take it." "You speak of him in the past tense. Why?" "I doubt we will see him again, at least not for long. He vowed to get arrested right away if they sent him back to us. Can you imagine how that makes a mother feel?" Theresa's sobs began anew. ------- Julia and her husband Frank were childless, and she often thought that was a good thing for her practice. If she related too closely to the torrid emotions such as were bombarding the poor mother in front of her, she might be far less effective as a therapist. In her years of study and treatment, she had found the emotions surrounding mother-child relationships to be the strongest and most treacherous of all. Not that Julia was an unemotional person - far from it. As Frank would readily attest, her voluptuous body, luxuriant auburn mane, and flashing eyes were not false advertising in any sense. In her mid forties, Julia's marriage to Frank, twelve years older, was emotionally and intellectually solid, and was fueled by a sexual intensity few newlyweds could match. After spending a double session with Theresa at the end of her normal office day, Julia was thankful that Frank would be at home to meet her. The head of a modest-sized but highly-regarded fashion company, Frank spent huge amounts of time traveling. Contrary to popular belief, Julia was never able to deal with the emotions of her patients in a completely detached, clinical fashion. Her natural empathy helped make her the exceptional healer that she was, but at the same time, it extracted an emotional toll. Her extended session with Theresa Menconi had been almost more than Julia could take at the end of a full day of patients. When her G.P. friend had begged her to take the case, she was reluctant, but Theresa's need was obvious. It was hard for a therapist to say that one patient's situation was worse than another's, but Theresa had dumped an emotional load that left Julia totally drained. It took Frank no more than a glance to go into his own therapist mode. Forsaking Julia's usual white wine, he went straight to the liquor cabinet and returned with a martini, her favorite on the rare occasions when she indulged in something hard. She made no protest when he handed it to her. "You get undressed. I'll start the tub," he told her. "But I'm starved, and something smells great," she objected. "Got that covered," he assured her, and she knew she was in for a treat. Frank liked to cook, though he had infrequent chances to exercise his skill. As had happened a number of times before, he would feed her as she luxuriated in the Jacuzzi tub and they chatted about their days. Frank had learned from experience the value of some sincere pampering. In truth, he never had to force himself. From their first meeting, he had worshipped Julia, and that feeling had stayed alive through the sixteen years of their marriage. Now, when they were separated so much, his determination to make their time together memorable kept their bond strong. In his work environment, Frank was surrounded by some of the world's most beautiful young women. He had never lacked for female company in his younger years, but never found one woman worth marrying. He found the emaciated models to be vapid, narcissistic, grasping, and more often than not, neurotic. It colored his whole attitude toward women. When Frank met Julia through a friend, his attitude changed instantly. Here was a real woman! She had all the right parts in luscious abundance. She had a mind that fairly crackled with intelligence and poise that left her unruffled in any situation. Since that day, it had delighted him the way Julia made world-class models seem like scrawny teeny-boppers when they mingled. That night, Julia had obviously absorbed some heavy-duty emotional baggage, and it was his privilege to free her from it. He had a tray with a covered dish sitting on the bathroom counter and was waiting when she walked naked into the bathroom. Julia knew very well Frank's fascination with her naked body, and willingly provided him every opportunity to enjoy it. His undisguisable reaction at every viewing was as arousing for her as for him. The last few years, she had let the press of her schedule intrude on her usually careful exercise and eating plan, and the pounds were starting to accumulate. So far Frank's ardor seemed unaffected, but she kept promising herself she would get back on track. Tonight was not the night she would reform her ways, though. The steak dish Frank had whipped up was rich with a sauce and tasted heavenly. As she laid her head back on the special cushion installed for that purpose, her generous breasts floated enticingly in the deep water. Struggling to keep his focus in the face of such distraction, Frank began feeding her. Because it had happened so many times, and because she believed that Frank truly enjoyed pampering her, Julia reveled in his attentions without a shred of guilt or shame. It also helped to know that she would get a chance for more than ample repayment a little later. From dealing with many troubled patients, she knew that the inability to take joyfully from one's partner had undermined many marriages. It was not going to happen to hers. As he fed her, they chatted lightly about their day. Julia did not tell him any details about her appointments, and she would never say anything that would connect her comments with specific people: that would have been unethical. She would at some point, though, describe the situation that had worn her out that night. It was an essential way to borrow strength from her lover. Frank had admired Julia from their first meeting, and the pride and admiration had only increased over the years. Actually, there was some guilt that went with the admiration. The more he found out about what she did and the people she helped, the more embarrassed he felt about his own venal business. Years earlier, he had made a personal vow to leave the fashion business at some point and get into something with more substantive impact. After the last bite of food and the last sip of wine, Julia made it clear that she needed to talk about her last session. She also made it clear that she needed touching as she talked, bringing Frank's hand right to her breast. From there on he knew just what to do. Gentle, almost absent-minded fondling was a key feature of their marital communication. Whenever they talked, they tried to keep contact, usually sexual. Thus, Frank played with the delightful floating masses of Julia's breasts as she described the anguish she had picked up from Theresa and what she had learned of the reasons. For over a half hour she talked, head back, eyes closed, nipples swollen from his gentle ministrations. His position on the floor beside the tub could have been more comfortable. On other occasions, he had joined her in the tub, but tonight it just didn't seem to fit. The opulent master bathroom had a massage table set up under a heat lamp, and when Julia's skin began to seriously shrivel, Frank helped her out of the tub and onto it. She had developed an innovation to the usual massage technique. Once she had been oiled all over, she wanted Frank to do the massage work with just one hand. The other she wanted lodged firmly between her legs, preferably as active as the hand working the muscles. Whether lying on her back or on her stomach, she was more than satisfied with only half the attention on her muscles, as long as her genitals got their share. After her long soak, Julia was almost limp. Because of the stimulation that accompanied the relaxing massage, after about twenty minutes, she was ready to come, rather than ready for sleep. He was more than happy to oblige, and locked his lips to hers as he focused his attention on her clit with his hand. With the long build-up and the overall sensual atmosphere, she was shaking the table with her orgasm within a very few minutes. As Julia lay on her back on the massage table, gasping for breath and still experiencing an occasional jerk, Frank hurried to prepare for the next step. Long ago, they had become addicted to the feel of her oiled skin as they made love, so they did not even think of showering first. He spread a large towel over the ultra-thick bathroom carpet, lit a couple of candles, turned off the heat lamp, and shed his clothes. Almost carrying her, he helped her onto the towel and knelt over her. There was no need for any foreplay for either of them - there had already been over an hour's worth. He entered her and began thrusting, making sure to slide his torso over the luxuriant slickness of her oily front. Everything up until now had been for her. Now it was his turn. She wrapped her arms around him to get more slippery contact. She tried to raise her legs, but the energy just wasn't there. It did not matter to him, as he had been hard since starting the massage, and he just kept plunging toward his own release. Sex for Julia and Frank was a lot of different things. One of their greatest joys was a large block of time set aside to enjoy every kind of carnal contact they could think of. When they had the time and energy, there was no better way to spend a couple of hours. That night was not one of those times. Instead, it was a time for sharing, comfort, affirmation, and release. Frank still could not believe his great fortune in sharing the love of his gorgeous, brilliant, sophisticated wife. Their sexual bouts were the kind that spawned letters to men's magazines. Yet, he never felt more fortunate than at the times when she was like a sleepy little girl, barely able to take care of herself. Once again almost carrying her, Frank helped Julia to the toilet, used it himself, then turned on the shower and washed the oil from both of them. When he handed her the toothbrush, she was able to do her own teeth, but only just. It was only 9:30, but he helped her into bed and joined her. In the few seconds before she sank into sleep, Julia took his penis in her hand in their long-time sign of union. Both fell asleep that way. ------- When Frank was awakened sometime in the wee hours by the wet heat of Julia's mouth around his swollen cock, he was not surprised, but was definitely elated. After breaking away for some essential relief of his distended bladder, he returned to bed and the veritable attack of his extremely horny wife. This had also happened numerous times before, and the sex was memorable. Perhaps it had something to do with the red hair - he neither knew nor cared. All he really cared was that Julia could throw herself into sex with complete abandon. When she did, there was no shred of timidity or modesty to diminish her ardor. He often thought that no man could really understand 'sexy' if he had not been with her in that state. It was at these times that Frank regretted the age difference, although he was not sure he had ever had the libido to match her intensity. But he tried: oh, how he tried! First, she rode him, and got herself off. Next, he took her doggy style. After many minutes in that position, they flopped down on the bed with him still embedded. He dragged his pillow over and got it under her crotch before he continued his serious fucking. Because he had come earlier, he did everything he could to delay his climax. He doubted he would be good for another in that session, although she had quite often wrung multiples out of him. As he pounded in and out of her, he made quick little bites on her shoulders, neck, and ears, producing squirms and squeals as he did so. One of the things that made their sex so rewarding was Julia's unique control over her own arousal. There is no question that simultaneous orgasm is the penultimate sexual experience, and they were fortunate enough to achieve it frequently. That night, Julia timed herself perfectly, and let herself sail into orgasm when she sensed he was on the brink. She got it right, and took him over with her into a mutual paroxysm of tremors and spasms. Once again, they fell into deep sleep, with him barely able to roll off of her. She had time to reclaim her grasp on his shrinking cock, not seeming to notice its slimy condition. ------- On Friday morning, after her father's drunken call on Wednesday night, Julie got Glen settled in for sleep, then plopped down next to Betty in the family room. It was obvious to Betty that the girl was troubled, and she took a chance, pulling Julie into a hug. That expression of love that she had so seldom experienced from a woman drove Julie to tears, and she wailed "I don't want to be a hateful person. I don't want to hate my mother, but I can't help the feelings!" Betty just rocked her back and forth for a while, trying to think of something to say that would be of comfort. Finally, she asked "How did you feel about her that day they were naked?" "I... I guess I was a real beast that day. I wanted to hurt them, make them feel a little of what I felt. I hated them! I admit it." "Did she seem like an evil person that day?" "Actually, she seemed kind of pathetic," Julie answered. "Do you think she understood what she had done?" "Yeah. A couple of times, she defended me to Dad. She admitted some things. Mostly, she just seemed shocked and sad." "Was it easy to hate her when she was shocked and sad?" Betty asked, hoping she had not gone too far. By then, Julie had stopped crying and she pulled back to look Betty in the face. "You're suggesting I go and see her in the hospital, aren't you?" Betty just grinned. "Knew you were smart. Right now, I'm more worried about how you feel than about how your mother feels. It's pretty clear that you are having trouble with your conscience this morning. I think a visit would help your conscience, if nothing else." ------- It was hard to say who was more surprised: Theresa at her daughter's visit, or Julie at her mother's appearance. How could anyone deteriorate so much in one week? Theresa had done her hair and face a little, but her eyes were bloodshot and there were noticeable bags under them. Her usual regal posture was replaced by a dejected slump. After some initial expressions of surprise, Theresa blurted out "That really was the only time we did that?" "I believe you. At least I'm sure it was the last time," Julie told her. "That was just a good excuse for the nudity, though," she explained. "It wasn't the reason I moved out." "Or the reason you stopped taking the pills," Theresa blurted without thinking. She knew she was right, but she also knew she should not have said it. It had been the thing haunting her the most, right behind the role-playing in the kitchen. "Well, I came because of my conscience," Julie declared as she stood. "You've made it very easy to leave with a much better conscience." With that, she walked out the door. Theresa jumped up and chased her, yelling and crying out her apologies, but Julie never turned around. A nurse intercepted Theresa as she tried to leave the ward, and they had to sedate her heavily to get her under control. Since 'the visit', Theresa had refused to fight with Vince. However, when Julie appeared, the old instincts reared up again, and she struck a blow. Of course, much of Julie's reaction was dictated by her own monstrous guilt, and her conscience was not eased in the least as she fought tears in the elevator. Sadly, neither had her feelings toward her mother changed. She would not even be able to tell Glen and Betty the real reason why she left so quickly. She would just have to say Theresa started right in attacking, which was true, but not the whole truth. Julia came by the hospital at her lunch break to talk to Theresa, and was disturbed to find out that she was too sedated to talk. When she determined what had happened, she tried to find out who the visitor was, but the staff did not know. From the minimal descriptions she obtained, she assumed it was Julie. Unfortunately, the hospital had no information on Julie, and nothing in Julia's notes from her session with Theresa gave her any help. She was certain that talking to Julie would help the treatment, particularly after the current crisis. One thing essential to every independent professional is a good assistant, and Julia had an exceptional one. She called her office from the hospital, and by the time she got back for her next appointment, Julie had been located. Just locating Julie did not solve Julia's problem, however. When called, Julie was not at all interested in talking to her mother's psychiatrist. When Julia explained how Theresa had become uncommunicative, though, she relented and explained what had happened, using the same version she had with Glen and Betty. "What exactly did she ask you," Julia delivered the question Julie dreaded. "Oh, it was something quite personal between us," Julie waffled. Julia felt she needed more to help her patient, and her instincts told her that what Julie was withholding could be crucial to Theresa's treatment. She also had a sense that it was crucial to the girl's life. "Julie, I believe the exact question is important to helping your mother, and that is my job. You know, don't you, that anything you tell me is strictly confidential? Could we please get together?" When Julie reluctantly agreed, Julia saw yet another day stretching way beyond normal office hours. She had the brief, pleasant thought that maybe it would get her another night like the last one. The two arranged to meet at the hospital, where Julia hoped she could go right in and talk to Theresa. ------- "Is it true?" Julia asked Julie after Julie finally gave up the question that had caused the flare-up. When Julie set her jaw, determined to protect her secret, Julia reminded her "The secret stays with me. I'm duty bound." "You won't even tell Mother?" "No, I won't," Julia assured her. "I assume your husband doesn't know." "No one does. Mother and Dad suspect." "Julie, I feel I need to tell you that a secret like that is a time-bomb. Someday when it comes out, it could destroy everything you treasure." "But if I told Glen now, it would destroy everything, anyway," Julie lamented. "Perhaps," Julia agreed, "but in some ways, you have less to lose right now. Even if it never comes out, that secret will poison your relationship." The girl's turmoil was obvious, and since she was not actually Julia's patient, she dropped the subject of the secret. Most of the next hour was spent getting background on the Menconis' home life. When she could, Julia probed more into Julie's current life. At the end of their meeting, Julia became very serious. "Julie, by coming to visit your mother, you did something very courageous, very mature. I applaud you. It is sad that she reacted by attacking, but I believe it was the last thing she wanted to do. She reacted from long-time bad habits, and she was instantly sorry. Her reaction afterward was so severe, there is still a chance she may have to be institutionalized." Julie gasped at that statement. "I am asking you to act as if today's blow-up never happened. I don't blame you for being angry, but please, go and see her right now. I am not over-dramatizing when I tell you her entire life could hang on it." Julie hung her head and said softly "She terrorizes me my whole life, and now I have to take it one more time to keep her out of the nut-house." "Could you live with yourself if you refused and things went badly for her?" ------- The sedatives had worn off for Theresa and had not been continued. However, she was as uncommunicative as when she was brought in on Wednesday. When Julie walked into the room, Theresa's eyes were darting around frantically, and it took many seconds before she noticed Julie and began to focus in on her. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I don't want to be like that any more!" Theresa said, barely suppressing tears. "I came back, Mother. Do you want to talk?" "Oh, yes! Thank you for coming. Julie, all those things you said I did to you... I did them. Vince did, too." "Didn't you have any idea how it was hurting me? Didn't you listen to anything I said?" Julie asked, once again working hard to keep her voice level. Theresa just shook her head sadly. "Didn't what happened to Terry give you some idea you needed to change things?" "Honey, all those things keep running through my mind day and night. No! We didn't realize anything. We didn't worry about what you were thinking. Everything was about control, about winning. As long as we were winning, that's all that mattered!" Julie was amazed at her mother's admissions, but it made her more angry that the realizations only came after her life was already turned upside down. There was not even a feeling of victory or vindication; Theresa's new awareness did Julie no good whatsoever. Along with Julie's amazement and anger came a lot of uncertainty. She was not even sure why she had come to see her mother. A big part part of her wanted to break off contact with her parents completely and permanently. As she thought about it, she decided she was there because of Betty, as much as anything. Julie considered her mother-in-law to be the wisest and most loving woman alive. The evidence of Betty's own family proved her to be an expert worth listening to. The new, but surprisingly close relationship with Betty was very precious to Julie. It was as if she finally had the mother she had been deprived of for most of her life. Now that she had reached out to make contact with her mother, what next? She could tell that Theresa had dreams of a normal mother/daughter relationship, but Julie could not see that ever happening. She did not expect or want to be as close to her mother as she was to Betty. Still, just this one visit did not discharge her obligation to her conscience. After all, Theresa had endured that terrible naked session just for a chance of further communication. Her mother was definitely changing and Julie needed to acknowledge that and reward it in some way. As she sat listening to Theresa grieve over the mistreatment she had been guilty of, Julie decided on what to do. She would visit her mother regularly, and after the baby was born, she would let her mother babysit as much as she wanted. Her child would have a chance for a normal grandparent interaction, never knowing the disaster that had befallen the Menconi household. There was absolutely no reason for concern about Theresa's childcare skills. Theresa would never have the daughter she wanted, but the baby would be an emotional substitute. If, in fact, she had undergone a major change, it would be good for both her and the child. Julie worried that her father did not seem to be changing at all. He must feel badly about the outcome for his family, but he did not appear ready to acknowledge any blame. She wanted to ask her mother about him, but the hospital was not the appropriate place or time. If Theresa had honestly 'reformed' but Vince had not, Julie could not imagine a satisfactory result for her parents' marriage. Sex was quite obviously their bond, and fighting was their foreplay. What would take its place? ------- By Julie's next visit to her mother, Theresa was at home, but by no means was she well. Julie almost did not go through with the visit because it was hard for her even to be in the house. It was her mother's lair, and she understandably feared some of the old attacks. It had not been easy to even arrange a time to visit. Julie's work schedule was one complication; avoiding her father was the other. Literally the only reason she was visiting at all was because of Theresa's sincere signs of repentance and remorse. There had been absolutely nothing to indicate that Vince had softened in the least. Any fear of being attacked by her mother turned out to be completely baseless. Julie's overall impression was of her mother as a shell of her former self. There seemed to be a total lack of the fire and drive that had always epitomized Theresa's personality. Despite her lingering hatred, Julie could not help but view her mother as pathetic. She stayed about an hour and a half, leaving when she knew her father was due back. It turned out to be mostly a question-and-answer session, with Theresa asking hundreds of questions. Julie found it rather eerie that her mother now seemed interested in the smallest details of her life. The same mother who totally ignored her feelings and wishes for all those years. One key focus of Theresa's interest was the Voss family. She apparently sensed Julie's love for her in-laws and was desperate to find out the 'secret'. She was just as desperate to make sure Julie would come back for another visit. She had to reassure herself several times as Julie was leaving. Walking to the car, Julie could only shake her head over what had transpired. It disturbed her that her hatred seemed less acute than when she arrived. In a perverse twist, she almost decided not to visit again for fear of losing that hatred. Without it, living with her own treachery would be even more difficult. ------- Julie's feelings translated into physical need, which grew all the way home. Much as she hated to do it, she went immediately to the bedroom, stripped, and crawled in with Glen. It was mid-afternoon and he had slept for about six hours. It was about when he usually got up to study. All that really mattered right then, though, was that she needed him. She needed the support, the encouragement, the tenderness that she could always depend on from him. Along with all those gentle, loving things, she also needed some physical release. She had read about how the sex drive sometimes strengthened during pregnancy, and she could feel it happening to her. Instead of morning sickness, she got horny. Julie almost cried after each of their love-making sessions. She was sure she was not imagining it: something was missing; there was some kind of a barrier to the kind of fusion of souls they had enjoyed before. She did not know if it was her, if it was him, or some of each. She just wished desperately that things could be 'right' again. Both of them were always careful not to exhibit any outward sign of tension or lack of full union. During sex, both did their best to make it good. But she knew, and she suspected he knew, as well. She kept asking herself why it could not be like it was before, but in her heart she knew the answer. They were different people than they were just a few weeks before. They were different because of what she had done! But she had been forced into doing it! At that conclusion, any softening of her hatred toward her mother was quickly reversed. As she lay next to her sleeping husband, barely able to be still because of the turmoil in her mind and the sexual tension, Julie endured yet another painful lesson in the irreversible consequences of selfish, impetuous actions. She had to admit to herself that she had been selfish and impetuous, and the guilt was almost overwhelming. The thing that added to her mental turmoil was the fact that she could not imagine what else she could have done. In all honesty, she believed she would have done the same thing again, and it frightened her to realize it. Right then, she needed to be held; she needed to be caressed; she needed to be impaled and driven to distraction. She needed it so badly she could not keep her breathing steady. That may have been what woke Glen. Glen sensed Julie beside him, reflexively reached out his hand, and feeling her naked hip, he turned his face toward her. What he saw tore right through to his heart. He saw anguish and fear, and something else he could not identify. Reacting quickly, he rolled toward her and pulled her close, feeling her shudder in his embrace. It would have been perfect to start a romantic interlude right then, or at least to lie there and comfort one another. Unfortunately, a full bladder and a bad case of morning breath put intimacy of any kind out of reach. A trip to the bathroom solved the two immediate problems, but gave Glen a chance to think for a moment. He felt so bad for having gotten her pregnant. If he had had any inkling that the pills were not perfect, he would have insisted on rubbers, or waited. Risk-taking, especially a risk of that magnitude, was just not in his makeup. What he had just seen in her eyes hit him like an indictment. What was worse was his inability to feel like he could comfort her. Once a big man on campus with a bright future, he was now just a nobody, scratching and clawing to provide a minimal living for his new, accidental family. If he had competed for swimming glory and come up short, he would have retained his pride and self-worth. Missing a chance to try because of his own stupidity destroyed that self-worth. He loved Julie desperately, but felt totally unworthy of her. As he returned to the bedroom, he saw her looking at him, and the need was obvious in her eyes. He did not feel like much of a man, but he would try for her sake. He shed his clothes and slid in facing her. When he pulled her close again, he felt like he was drawing far more comfort from her than he was giving back. Coming up short again! Julie's thoughts were on one thing only, and she went for it almost frantically. As Glen pulled her close, she did not return the embrace, but brought both of her hands to his crotch. As he pulled her into a kiss, she felt him start to swell in response to her strokes. That was the first part of the reassurance she sought. She was sure he did not know of her trap, but her guilt was so strong that she half expected him to hate her. His erection gave her hope that he did not - that at least some of the magic between them had survived. When Glen's kisses mirrored the same hunger that Julie felt, her feelings of desperation started to fade, replaced by pure lust and by the thrill of their union. His body never failed to excite her, and most often, she became fully lubricated from just a kiss and an embrace. This time was no different, and she turned onto her back and tried to slide under him. With her firm grasp on his now-rigid cock, there was no question at all what she wanted. Even though he could not fully understand why she still wanted him, Glen was elated that she did, and that she let him know so openly. He was atop her and embedded in her so quickly it was as if they had been doing it for many years. The last stroke that brought their pubic bones into contact became the first thrust if of an intense, almost desperate session that soon had her unashamedly groaning and whimpering loudly as his breathing accelerated like an old steam locomotive. At some point, arousal pushed guilt and shame far into the background for both of them. It was exactly what they needed. They needed to know that at least there, in their marriage bed, joined together, there was still hope, joy, and acceptance. There was still that love between them that was stronger than the blows they had taken; stronger than the events that conspired to tear them from each other. ------- Chapter 8 By the time Terry Menconi arrived at the state juvenile rehab center, he was too numb to react even to the humiliating check-in process. The previous few weeks had been just too unreal for him to relate to. Oh, he obviously noticed the stark contrast between the spare room he shared with another boy and the rather luxurious room he had lived in at home for his whole life. And he could not help but notice the bored, emotionless actions of the employees who processed him. He most definitely noticed that. ------- Emotionless was an attitude that Terry had not often encountered. As he told his friends, everything at his home happened with the gain all the way up. When his mother was being motherly, the sugar almost dripped off of her, she was so melodramatic. When she was being critical, which happened much more often, it was just as overacted, but a harsh, negative tone replaced any sweetness. Then, in the midst of one of the endless pitched battles, the emotional level was off the scale. The criticism and micromanaging were bad, but Terry could probably have survived just fine if that was the worst dysfunction in the Menconi household. What he never could tolerate were the fights. Being very bright and perceptive, he understood completely that most of it was show and ritual. But it was also for the purpose of determining who won - who got to force their will on the losers. Terry just could not do battle. It was not in his nature. Thus, he became the one the loser controlled to assuage their bruised ego. All except his older sister Julie. Julie fought with their parents - oh, how she fought! But she never took it out on Terry. Rather, she often went to battle for him. He felt she honestly understood his feelings and did her best to protect him. The problem was, she was so wrapped up in protecting herself that she could not always watch out for him. Terry, like his sister, instinctively understood some of the essentials of survival. Being bright just like her, he never slacked off on school work as a form of rebellion. He knew that the retribution would be too severe to contemplate. Beyond that, he was determined to earn an academic scholarship that would get him to a school of his choosing, not his parents'. Especially after what he saw happening to Julie, he became even more determined scholastically. Neither did he use any form of misbehavior or disrespect as a weapon. For one thing, it was not worth the trouble, and for another, he was a naturally congenial, respectful person. Most of his friends could not remember a harsh or sarcastic word from Terry. Friends were essential to another of his survival imperatives. It took him no longer than Julie to learn that the less time he spent at home, the better. Being naturally gregarious, his friends' parents tended to see him more than did his own. Typically, Terry would stay at the school library for the relatively short time it took him to complete his daily homework. Then, he would meet one or more friends and hang out. Terry had reached 6'3" by his junior year. He was slim but not skinny, and undeniably handsome. Exercise, both running and weightlifting, had become a critical form of escape and stress management for him, giving him a surprisingly strong and well-toned body for his age. Despite his mild demeanor, Terry had inherited the Menconi temper. As a very young lad, he saw Julie's struggles with anger, and worked very hard to control his own. To him, it represented what was worst about his family, and he wanted no part of it. Of course, it was not that easy, and when he reached puberty, all of the other emotional and hormonal changes made anger control a severe challenge. That was when he discovered that exercise, hard exercise, went a long way toward diffusing his tightly constrained emotions. Terry was quite athletic, although probably not enough to make a varsity team. His father, Vince, desperately wanted him to excel at a sport, and that was enough to quench his interest in formal competition. Through all the forced little league baseball and pee wee football, he had to ignore the fun he was having and purposely slack off. The pressure even lasted into high school. He thoroughly enjoyed casual games with his friends, and played them all well enough to be a welcome participant. Thus, between study, exercise, games, and hanging with friends, Terry had his own ways of avoiding home, just as Julie did. Theresa never stopped harping at both of the kids about never being around, but when they both produced excellent grades and zero behavior problems, she could not marshal a reason to clamp down on their level of absence. When Julie won her epic battle for her virginity, Terry was quick to see the backlash. As soon as the subject of college came up, he knew his parents would use it to punish Julie for beating them. He even talked to her about it, but she just could not believe even they would stoop to that. Perhaps because she was able to engage them, sometimes successfully, she did not have as realistic a view as he did of the evil inherent in their control mania. He saw it clearly, and it frightened him badly. Getting girls was simple for Terry, with his looks and personality. He first had sex at fourteen, but it was a secret he held very, very closely. Uncharacteristically, he did not even tell Julie. He was afraid that in the heat of battle she would use the fact as an argument. She would not do it intentionally, but he saw that the combatants were not ruled by thought when they fought, and it was a problem he did not want to face. Once initiated, Terry had sex with several different girls. A single, long-term girlfriend was not something he was interested in. The girls he slept with were all very good friends and remained so afterward. Since they were not promiscuous, his passion for secrecy suited them very well. The respect that came naturally to him made a big hit with his companions. His thirst for affection hit a responsive cord with his partners, and along with his well-developed cock, they were always quite satisfied. Sex was Terry's only overt form of rebellion against his parents, and he was by no means obsessed with it. He did, in fact, feel more than a little guilt about it. Through his sophomore year, Terry had gone out for basketball, simply because he could not take the hammering from Vince. In his junior year, he was no longer eligible for the JV, and he did not make the varsity. That did not fit well at all with Vince's plans for his son, and things became worse. Especially galling was the fact that Vince could not do anything about it. Terry just was not good enough. Julie's college battles also hit full stride about then, and the level of tension and strife was constantly high. Although all of Terry's friends were among the better students and 'good kids', so pervasive were drugs on the high school campus that no social segment was immune. One of his sex partners, in a well-meaning attempt to ease his mental anguish, gave him a pill to try. The feeling of escape was very real, and he had to have more. Not well schooled in subtlety and subterfuge, Terry was caught in a remarkably short time. The circumstances of Terry's arrest were puzzling. Pills were found in his locker at school, but he never took any into the building. An immediate blood test found the drug in his system, so the authorities shrugged off his protests that those from his locker were not his. They had heard it all the time. He had used the pills, there was no denying that, nor did he try to. The other puzzling, frustrating fact was that the drug, illegal in their state, was a formulation sold under prescription in several foreign countries, and was not much more potent than Prozac. In fact, by the time Terry was to be released, it was no longer on the proscribed list. There was absolutely no rational reason that Terry should have ended up with more than a slap on the wrist, except for an incredible combination of naivete, arrogance, hubris, and over-zealousness. He was caught at school by an assistant principal just assigned as the 'drug czar'. He was the first catch, and a very high profile one, at that. The official was anxious to flex her muscle and went after Terry as if he was the most hardened offender. When things finally got to a judge, the judge saw the absurdity of the situation and did her best to give Terry an out. Unfortunately, the outs all involved counseling, something Vince seemed to have a pathological hatred for. When Vince refused to even allow Terry to go to counseling, the judge's hands were tied, and incarceration was the only option. The school official could have dropped the charges, but she was not at all inclined to do that. The case worker honestly did her best to keep Terry out of confinement, but with both Vince and the school official being totally inflexible, there was nothing she could do. She was furious with Vince, trying again and again to convince him how bad the center was. Even if he believed her, he apparently saw it as deserved punishment for the horrible disgrace his son had brought down upon him. Through all the turmoil, Theresa was almost in a trance. She could not believe it was actually happening. Obviously, she did not want her son taken away, but she was nearly as upset as Vince over his drug use. In this case, Vince dominated her completely, and she had no influence on the outcome. Particularly troubling to Theresa was the caseworker's assessment of why Terry had taken the drugs. It was the first time an outsider had made reference to their home life as being unusual or aberrant in any way, and it shocked and angered her. Mostly, it knocked her off balance so that she was a passive spectator. Thus, Terry Menconi, top student, never a discipline problem, having taken a total of about twenty pills, was sentenced to three months in the state juvenile drug rehab center, where no other first-time offender had ever been sent. ------- The center was more for punishment than rehabilitation, though no official would ever acknowledge that fact. The building itself was previously a reformatory, and had very much the prison look. There were, of course, counselors who had regularly scheduled sessions with the inmates. Caseworkers made regular weekly visits to spend at least a few minutes with their long lists of charges. Regular school classes were conducted, as well, but at a level that was absurdly easy for Terry. The confusion and disorientation that enveloped Terry during the legal process gave way to a strange sort of calm over his first couple of weeks at the center. The surroundings were depressing, the food abysmal, and boredom was a serious problem. However, he finally identified the source of the calm as the absence of his parents. There really was no pressure of any kind. He was a regular in the weight room, and did countless circuits on the small oval track around the upper level of the small gym. Although he did not make any close friends right away, he got acquainted with most of the other boys. He decided his three month sentence might not be the worst period of his life, after all. Just as in a prison, the inmates at the center had their own hierarchy, with an acknowledge leader at the top. Also just as in prison, the 'boss' kid achieved his position by intimidation and/or a special relationship with the authorities. Everyone on the street knew that the director of the center liked boys. The current boss kid, either because he was so inclined or through an overreaching drive for dominance, accommodated the director, and was well rewarded. The boss kid and his three acolytes occupied the two best rooms in the place. They were almost a cartoon version of a bully and his gang. The boss was a fairly tall, well-built kid, handsome and outgoing. His roommate was the gorilla, with the intelligence to match. The other two were the crafty little weasel and the average kid sycophant. Since he put out for the Director, the boss kid felt he was owed his own jollies, and tended to take them where he chose. For helping him, his gang was exempt from his attentions, and could take their own piece from victims. Being handsome, personable, new, and apparently naive, Terry became a target of the boss kid. It was late in his third week, just before lights out. Terry was using the late shower period, as were over half of the boys in his wing. It was his habit to wait until the end of the permissible time, then go right to sleep. He never paid much attention to who else was in the shower, so he was caught completely by surprise when the boss kid barred his way as he went to leave. Looking around quickly, he saw that the attendant (guard, really) who was always supposed to be present was missing, and there was only the boss kid's gang. He knew then, that he was in a bad situation. When he saw the boss kid stroking his already hard cock, he knew what they had in mind. "It's time for your initiation, Pretty Boy," the boss kid said with his ever-present sneer. At that moment, the gorilla and the sycophant grabbed him and forced him down onto his knees, with the weasel fluttering around as if he was in charge. The weasel was also erect, either from anticipation or from a voyeuristic thrill. The boss kid knelt behind Terry and put one hand on his back as he used the other to aim his cock at Terry's anus. The gorilla was lying across Terry's upper back, his arms wrapped tightly around Terry, pinning his arms and forcing his face down on the rough, cracked tiles. The mind works strangely in stressful situations, and even as he was struggling against the gorilla's mass, Terry recalled seeing other boys walking with great difficulty on a few occasions. He now knew the cause. From early childhood, Terry had recognized his temper, and he had fought hard to subdue it. Every time a battle occurred at his home, the anger built until he felt he could hardly contain it. The urge to enter into the fray and vent that anger was almost overpowering. Yet, he never gave in. Instead, he would run until he could not take another step, or he would pound the weights until his arms quivered in exhaustion. One way or another, he bottled the rage. Pinned to the rough, cold floor of that filthy shower room, about to be raped, a rage such as Terry had never known soared within him. Every injustice done to him by his parents had led to his current crisis, and all the blame focused into an detonation that he did not even try to restrain. There are countless stories of people achieving impossible feats of strength because of fear or concern for a loved one. Rage can have the same effect, and it did for Terry, right then. He literally exploded up off of the floor with a roar, seemingly oblivious to the three boys holding him down. The gorilla's grip was broken as Terry's arms spread to push off of the floor. With nothing to hold onto, the gorilla was thrown up and back, staggering toward the wall several feet away. Just as he neared the wall, he lost his footing on a puddle, and fell backwards. His head struck a faucet handle, and he sagged to the floor unconscious in a pool of spurting blood. The sycophant had been doing his little part to hold Terry down, and was likewise thrown off by the force of Terry's surge. He was spun around and thrown against the other wall, which was much closer. He was stumbling and falling as he hit the wall, and he hit first with his knee. His arms were thrown up in reflex as he fell, and one elbow cracked as it absorbed the rest of the impact. The boss kid had been kneeling straight up with his torso leaning over Terry's back. His cock was pointing upward from his crotch, so he had to lean to get the proper angle for penetration. When Terry exploded upward, his ass impacted squarely against the kid's testicles. As he was hurled backwards, he was already doubling over in pain and adding his scream to Terry's feral roar. The weasel just screamed and tore out of the shower, only to be collared by the attendant, who had been hovering just around the corner, watching. The whole thing took barely two seconds, and when it was over, Terry stood trembling with the remains of the rage, gasping to get control of his breathing. His back had been to the door, and as he turned, he saw the attendant standing slack-jawed, holding the weasel and surveying the carnage. With a flash of inspiration, Terry stalked toward the attendant and stopped right in his face. "If you want to keep your job, and keep the Director's dirty secret from coming out, I was not here. You make up a story about them getting in a fight." With that, he strode off to his room, naked, and without a towel, his rage dissipating into shakes with every step. It took hours for Terry's adrenalin levels to normalize, and when daylight approached, he still could not sleep. He had no idea what the morrow would bring, but he was strangely unconcerned. He somehow knew he was no longer under any threat of rape, and beyond that, he really didn't care. Until the events of that night, the Center had been a retreat for Terry, almost a refuge. Most of the negatives had paled in comparison to the solitude and control of his own time that he had. There was no need to plan out where he was going to go that day to escape his parents. There was no fear of another screaming match breaking out just when he was trying to relax. Certainly, the rape attempt was cause for fear, but he instinctively knew he was no longer in danger. The society within the center was definitely based on survival of the fittest, and he had just established himself as one to be left alone. The Director, and his response, was still an unknown, and Terry was worried about that. He had a pen and some paper in the room, and he got up and painstakingly wrote out his account of what happened in very small print. He included what he had heard of the relationship between the Director and the boss kid. He left room for a very clear signature and instructions that the information be kept secret unless something happened to him. Julie had brought him a set of books when she and Glen visited after his first week inside. Taking the first in the series, he carefully opened a seam at the bottom of the back binding and worked his scrap of paper into the opening. The whole process was made difficult because he worked by just the sparse light through the small, barred window, unwilling to risk waking his roommate. ------- At breakfast, it was obvious that the attendant had not been able to make up a story, at least not for the inmates. Terry could tell just from the looks he got, that the rumor mill had spread the account, probably in exaggerated form. As he walked out the door, one boy that he knew relatively well softly said "Way to go, Hulk!" He was later to learn that the new nickname referred to him throwing his attackers off just like the Incredible Hulk of the TV series. By coincidence, he was due to meet with his caseworker right after breakfast. He decided to say nothing to her about the incident. The main reason he wanted to preserve her naivete was to get the book out to Julie without suspicion. The caseworker was just a little puzzled at his request, but agreed to deliver the book. Otherwise, their session was uneventful. Knowing that the story was on the street, Terry fully expected to be called to the Director's office. However, he needed to be sure the caseworker was away from the Center before that happened. He had found out that she had two more appointments after his before she left, and he needed to stall until then. He was not an accomplished malingerer, and perhaps that worked in his favor. When he went to the dispensary complaining of a severe headache and nausea, the LPN who worked there believed him. Perhaps she also had heard the stories and expected some aftereffects. Through connivance and good fortune, it was well into the afternoon before Terry sat facing the Director. He was surprised that he was not more nervous. Perhaps because he knew he had done nothing wrong, he was less worried than he should have been. Having never met the Director, the only thing he knew was about the man's perversion. "Well, Mr... Menconi, is it? You've got yourself into a serious mess here," the Director started off. "Why? Because I refused to submit to rape?" Terry shot back, amazing himself at his boldness. "Rape, nothing! You brutally attacked those four boys. One of them had to be taken to the hospital." The Director was obviously going to stick with the party line. "I attacked the four of them, huh? While your attendant stood and watched, no doubt?" "Don't try to be sarcastic with me, Menconi!" Terry just stared at the man for a moment, then was infused with a feeling of nothing to lose. "Mr. Director, SIR," he said, sarcastically emphasizing the 'sir', "we both know exactly what happened, so unless you are recording this, what's the use of the bullshit?" The man actually gasped slightly at that, and colored, obviously getting ready for another outburst. "No, don't bother getting all indignant," Terry continued, really on a roll. "I know damn well this could blow the lid off your little game, here, and you know it, too. If you decide to have me killed, it wouldn't be the worst thing that could happen to me, but the shit would really come down on you." "Nothing would happen to me," the man objected. "Nobody outside knows what happened. What I say is the way it is." The director was now leaning intently toward Terry as he spoke, rather than sitting pompously and assuredly erect as he had at first. He was obviously not used to his intimidation efforts being rebuffed. Terry was about to tell him that his account had gotten outside, but thought better of it, his jaw actually snapping shut just before the first words were spoken. It turned out to be an accidentally brilliant move. The Director saw, and knew exactly what it meant. The word had gotten outside. Seeing the man pause, Terry picked up the initiative again. "I know you have to do something to me because the story is on the street. I did not tell anyone, but I guess that doesn't matter. Here's the deal. I will take a longer sentence, but no isolation. I just want my peace and quiet, and you will never hear about me again. Deal?" "What makes you think you can dictate terms to me?" The Director demanded. Terry did not respond, and after about a minute of silence, he spat out. "You get three extra months. You will be left alone. Now get the Hell out of here!" ------- News that Terry's sentence had been doubled for fighting had hit Theresa very, very hard. Its impact was even greater because it came when there was no longer any doubt that Julie was gone for good. Vince had done his best not to react to the news. He was not even sure he believed it: Terry, fighting? It did not square with the weakness that had gotten the kid into drugs in the first place. Once again they drove to the center to try to see Terry. Once again he refused to see them. Vince had only reluctantly agreed to go, after extreme pleading from Theresa. On the way home he harangued her about not listening to him. It was obvious that he had not the faintest idea about how she felt about her children, and how their loss affected her. ------- Apparently the Director feared the consequences of Terry's shower incident because Terry was left alone for the remainder of his sentence. It could not be said that he enjoyed his time, but it was strangely restoring for him. He had the laughable classes, the counseling sessions, his workouts, and solitude. Julie and Glen visited again shortly after the attack. Terry told her "Julie, if anything happens to me her, that book I sent back is the clue. I'm asking you not to look for anything as long as I'm OK. Will you do that for me, please!" Julie, shaken by his words and his serious tone, nevertheless agreed. Solitude tends to promote deep thought, and it was certainly true for Terry. Much of his thought centered around his parents. Perhaps it was due to loneliness that he would not admit to, but he began having second thoughts about his total rejection of them. He honestly did not want to ever see them again, but his quiet hours were troubled by guilt. Perhaps it was his moral obligation to at least communicate with them. He had just about decided to meet with his folks when Julie and Glen visited with news of her pregnancy and their marriage. Their appearance stunned him. Glen's trademark energy and positive 'aura' were gone. When Terry asked about the scholarship, Glen could not answer and had to turn away. Terry could see in his sister's eyes that she had done it on purpose, and that the guilt would never leave her. He also understood exactly why she had done it, for he shared the same desperation. Any softening of feeling for their parents stopped right then. ------- Julie honored her pledge to continue visiting her mother. Each week, it was a puzzle to work out the right time. Several times, Theresa had to meet Julie for lunch near her work. Neither left their meetings feeling better. Theresa cried every time they parted because she could tell there was a barrier between them. Over the last few months she had become more perceptive of mother-daughter relationships around her, and it was killing her inside. Every example she saw filled her with longing and regret: longing for that kind of fellowship with Julie, and regret that she herself had made it impossible. For Julie, each meeting left her stressed, torn between hatred and guilt. She knew she would be better off never seeing her mother again, but she had committed. The times when she could not seek solace from sex with Glen afterward were pure agony until she could get with him. Something else weighed heavily on Julie. As Terry's release date approached, Theresa was more and more distraught over his threats to get arrested again. In fact, it became almost all she could talk about. Julie loved her brother and feared for his future. She felt that her own life was now ruined, and she hated to see the same thing happening to the brother she had tried for her whole life to protect. She did not even have a home she could offer him. Besides, she and Glen would probably not be considered proper guardians. Terry was still six months from being eighteen. Betty sensed the increasing tension and sadness in Julie. At first, she thought it was just some pregnancy symptoms, but she finally noticed that it was worse after every meeting with her mother. When Betty confronted her, Julie broke down and told her the problem. Aghast at Terry's refusal to go home, she questioned Julie for a long time about the reasons. Julie had talked about her brother often, but had never described him so thoroughly. Once started, her deep love for him showed through clearly. The picture of a gentle, thoughtful, intelligent boy seemed almost too good to be true, yet Betty knew Julie was not one to exaggerate. After they had talked about Terry for half an hour, Betty asked Julie to wait for her to return. She went to talk to her husband Alan, although Julie did not know that. Many minutes later, both of them came back and addressed Julie. "Julie," Alan told her, "we will let Terry stay here, if your parents will agree." "What? How? I mean... where?" "I know the basement isn't ready yet, and I apologize for not getting at it. If he is willing, he can move in down there. Maybe he can help finish it. When it's done, you and Glen can move down there as you had planned, and Terry can have your room." "Oh, my God!" Julie exclaimed, and broke into tears. She didn't think she could love these people any more than she did, but they kept giving her more and more reasons. And every new act of kindness or generosity sharpened the spears of guilt over her betrayal of them and their dreams for their son. "Before you say anything to your mother, though," Betty cautioned her, "we had better meet with Terry and see if he is agreeable." "I think the best way to do it," Alan said, "is for him to officially move home, but actually stay here." ------- It took intervention from the caseworker to get Betty and Alan permission to visit Terry, but it was finally arranged. They wanted to visit him alone, but in the end, the caseworker had to be present. He was flabbergasted by their offer, but accepted without hesitation. Julie had told him all about the Vosses and the love they had shown her. His mind practically screamed for a little of that for himself. He had experienced it in some of his friends' homes, and the contrast with the pressure and strife of his own home always weighed heavily on him. Terry made one absolute stipulation: upon his release, he was not to have any contact with his parents. Without that guarantee, he would just do whatever it took to get his sentence extended six more months until he was eighteen. Betty and Alan were shocked at the vehemence of his demand, but the caseworker had heard it before. She agreed to pick him up at release and take him to the Vosses'. No sooner had they started home than Betty told Alan "Honey, we have a big problem." "Oh, I don't think he will be any trouble," Alan assured her. "I think Julie is right - he's a good kid." "You don't understand, Sweetie. The problem is Julie didn't tell us he's such a hunk. What's going to happen with Ellie living under the same roof with him." "Ohhhhh! But we can't back out now," he told her. "Maybe he won't be attracted to Ellie, anyway." "That would be the ultimate disaster," she almost moaned. "Huh?" "Do you think there is any chance Ellie won't fall head over heels for him?" "I guess we had better back out," he said, realizing she was right. Their daughter, who took after Betty in size and shape, was sensitive about her looks. She had a wonderful swimmer's body, but she was tall and quite muscular. Alan and his sons had done a lot to make her realize how beautiful she was, but verification from outside the family had been rare. She was vulnerable at best. "No, that boy needs help, and we're the right ones to give it," she insisted. "What if they fall in love?" he asked after a quiet moment. Betty was wistfully still for a moment before she responded. "I would be happy to see her as lucky as her mother." Saying that, she turned and gave her husband a sexy grin. They had been sweethearts since high school, when he fell hard for her, salvaging her then non-existent self-image. "Isn't it dangerous having them in the same house?" "Maybe I'd better get her on the pill tomorrow," Betty answered. "What?" he sputtered. "You mean, you expect them to have sex?" "Well, I would hope that if it happens, they would be making love," she told him. "Uh, Alan, do you still remember our first time?" Reaching across to take her hand, he assured her "As if I could ever forget?" "And how old were we?" "But that was diff... there I go, huh? I guess all that would be different is them living in the same house. Honestly, Betty, do you want Ellie to get involved with a guy with a drug problem." "First of all, I don't want her just 'involved' with anyone. I want her to find the love of her life like I did. If she finds him when she's young, like I did, so much the better. As far as Terry, I don't honestly think he has a drug problem. I think he only has a parent problem, and we're helping him with that. We both love Julie, and it seems like he has all the same good qualities." This time, he reached up and gently stroked her hair as he drove. "Did I ever tell you how lucky I was to catch you?" She answered by rubbing her cheek against his wrist, then kissing his palm. ------- Theresa's reaction when Julie told her of the Voss' offer was predictable. She cried for almost fifteen minutes. Julie felt sorry for her, but any physical show of affection to her mother was still beyond her - it might always be beyond her. Theresa was greatly relieved that her son would not be tempted to take the drastic step of getting arrested again. She was grateful to the Vosses for taking him in. But seeing the second of her children leaving her to live with another family was a further indictment of her failed motherhood, and it wounded her to the core. There was no longer any inclination in Theresa to defend her behavior toward her children. Between her therapy sessions with Julia and her meetings with Julie, she was fully aware of the harm she had done, and willing to admit to it. She was desperately sorry for what she had done, and wanted even more desperately to atone for it. Julia, however, was helping her come to grips with the fact that a 'normal' relationship with her children was probably impossible. The best she could hope for at that point was to see the damage she and Vince had done minimized. With Julie's life already massively disrupted, that was an impossible challenge. Terry's level of bitterness and his absolute refusal to even see them devastated her. It appeared there was nothing she could do to have any further effect on her son's future. Part of the 'old', fierce, combative Theresa was furious with Betty Voss for 'stealing' her children. But Julia had spent a lot of time counseling her about that, too. Theresa had only met Betty briefly, and she feared Betty considered her a monster. For some reason, it was very important to her to correct that impression. But could she correct it? Isn't that what she truly was? As punishment for her past sins, she was going to have to tell Vince about the Vosses' offer, and that she had accepted it. There really was no alternative, and he knew it. There would still be an explosion, she also knew. She was aware that he was going through agonies of his own. But his were more of anger, denial, and disbelief. He had not gotten to the point of admission and remorse, and she doubted he ever would. Whatever happened in the future, he would believe his children had betrayed and abandoned him. Now, she was in line for accusations of betrayal, as well. It was becoming very clear to Theresa that part of her punishment for abusing her children was the loss of her happy marriage. Looking back at it, she was more and more amazed that she had considered it happy at the time, but she had. She and Vince were well matched, gave each other what they each wanted and needed, and shared at a very intimate level. And the sex... Because of Julie's accusations, Theresa now realized that it was strange and perverted. But it certainly felt wonderful at the time, and neither was abusing the other. When she thought of their sessions, part of her was sickened, but an equal part was filled with longing for what could never be again. There had not been a fight-inspired sexual encounter since that last fateful one in the kitchen - the one that precipitated the final dissolution of her family. There had only been a few fights, and none since that awful naked session. She and Vince had had sex a few times, but far less than their usual frequency. And it had been a whole different experience. In some ways, the 'new' sex was more tender and loving. Rather than the animal lust and the adrenalin of battle that fueled their previous bouts, recent couplings were driven by honest physical need, and a sincere desire to comfort each other. Theresa had actually initiated sex a few times recently. She had always liked the tenderness and cuddling. She had just gotten so used to the high from their more boisterous encounters that she had nearly forgotten about it. The big problem with sex now, and the most frightening threat to their future, was that they were no longer the same people - at least Theresa was no longer the same. Vince was still as controlling, self-assured, and self-righteous as ever. Of course, he had been hurt by what had happened to his children, but he still viewed it as something bad that had happened to him, rather than anything he had caused. Loss of family was a very real tragedy for him, but one that had fallen upon him, not anything of his own doing. Thus, with his other traits, he now wore a very real cloak of martyrdom. Because of his staunch refusal to consider any form of counseling, prospects for any significant change were dim. For Theresa, the change was equivalent to a personality transplant. Whereas she was once a clone of Vince, as far as her drive for dominance and her self-assurance, she now came across as frightened and insecure. The very thought of raised voices made her almost physically ill. Every time she considered what she had believed about being a wife or a mother, she found nothing but disastrous mistakes. It was hard for her to find anything that she had done right. Julia had not known Theresa before the blowup with Julie, but she had found out as much as she could from Julie, and Theresa herself had freely described her 'before' persona, as well. Seldom in her practice had she seen such a sudden, drastic change. The problem was that there was nothing to replace the old ego. In fact, there was nothing in Theresa's life but failure and loss, the way she saw it. Julia was acutely aware that Theresa was in a very dangerous place. All of the elements were present for severe depression, breakdown, and suicide. Fortunately, Julie had agreed to a few sessions, and Julia spent a good deal of time emphasizing Theresa's fragility. She was gratified to see that Julie's anger toward her mother stopped short of wishing her dead or institutionalized. Julie was well aware that her visits with Theresa were probably the only thing preventing either situation. With Theresa, Julia had a tough time finding points of focus - things that would give Theresa's life enough meaning to stave off disintegration or drastic action. Despite the changes, Theresa was still at heart a take-charge person, a doer. What Julia finally found her responding to was the idea of trying to redress the mistakes of the past. That was a dangerous path to follow, because there was precious little that could actually be fixed. However, it was the only focal point Julia could find, and without something, Theresa would be lost. The biggest healing weapon in Julia's arsenal was the baby. Julie had agreed, after urging by both Betty and Julia, to let Theresa have as normal a grandmother relationship as possible. In Theresa's mind, it was a chance to do things right. She had volunteered, no begged, to provide day care while Julie worked. Haunted by her own past, Julie was very reluctant at first, as was Glen. Julia, though, had convinced them that Theresa would never repeat the same mistakes. From her own observations, Julie had to agree. It would be a very real help to the young couple, and an even bigger help to the distraught grandmother. After hearing the Vosses' offer to house Terry, Theresa wisely waited until after her next session with Julia before telling Vince. It turned out that she needed every bit of advice and encouragement that Julia had given her. Vince was thrown into full enraged martyr mode. He went into a good old-fashioned tirade, ignoring the fact that it was one-sided. The Vosses were the first target of Vince's rage, as he accused them of seducing away his children. Then, he tore into Terry, bemoaning his lack of manliness, his ingratitude, and his weakness and stupidity for falling into drug use. After repeating himself several times on Terry, he aimed his ire at Julie, recounting all of her terrible mistreatment of them, her generous and caring parents. As Julia had warned her he would, Vince finally turned on Theresa. He started by chastising her for taking Terry's and Julie's sides and not sticking up for him as the head of the house. Then he ridiculed her for going all soft and refusing to engage in honest discussion with him, meaning fighting, of course. Finally, he got very personal, accusing her of withholding sex to punish him. As he was telling her what a lifeless, lousy lay she was, he stopped in mid-word and stared at her. She knew this was coming, but it still hurt her. She sat with her head lowered, tears streaming silently down her cheeks. He turned on his heel and walked out of the house. The subject of Terry's residence was not mentioned again, and Theresa called Julie and told her they had agreed. Betty suggested that the two sets of parents should get together, but Theresa did not think that would be a good idea because of Vince. She did go to their house one afternoon when Alan got home, but while Vince was still at work. The meeting between Theresa, Betty, and Alan was as strange as anyone could imagine, but it was still a good idea. Theresa was very grateful for the way they were helping her children, and she told them every way she could. But at the same time, she could not hide the hurt that they preferred to live with someone other than her. Betty felt great sympathy for the stricken woman, but she could not forget the many times Julie had cried in her arms over what her mother had done to her. She knew from Julie that Theresa had changed dramatically, but she secretly doubted that anyone could change that suddenly and completely. Alan was not nearly as attuned to the emotions washing through the meeting, but he took a very strong role in assuring Theresa that they were happy to help Terry get back on his feet. He promised they would do everything they could to get him to communicate with her. ------- Terry's caseworker was more than happy to do the extra job of checking him out of the center. She could not remember another case that had drawn her in emotionally the way this one had. There was no reason on earth that Terry should ever have been sentenced to that place. Then to get his sentence doubled for injuring those boys! Terry would never tell what really happened, but she had been around long enough to make a pretty good guess. When he absolutely refused to have anything to do with his parents, she thought he was lost for good. But then, miraculously, the Vosses offered to take him in. It was because of the existence of good people like them that she stayed in that job with its grinding hopelessness and backbreaking bureaucratic demands. If she could just save one once in a while, she could make it, and feel she had done her part. Terry was a big save, she just knew it. Betty and Alan had sat down together with Ellie and Marty and told them they were inviting Terry to stay with them. Easygoing Marty looked forward to having another pal in the house, a year closer to his age. Both kids knew Terry slightly from school, but neither had spoken much to him. "He's... he's really good-looking!" Ellie blurted out, then covered her face in embarrassment. "You don't have any idea, Honey," Betty teased her. "I think he spent most of his time at the center working out. Just prepare yourself. I, um, couldn't help a little reaction myself." "Mom!" Ellie blurted out, then the two of them fell into a giggling hug while Alan and Marty rolled their eyes in mock disgust. "Seriously, Honey, will you be OK with it?" Betty asked. "You mean having to live with four hunks instead of just three? I don't know. I suppose I can survive." That quip was followed by more giggles. "Darn! I'll have to wear more clothes around the house, won't I?" "Oh, No! He can't come!" Marty objected melodramatically. "That's too much of a price to pay. You can't deprive me of the sight of my babe sister's body!" He knew enough to duck from the swing which quickly came his way. The smile on Ellie's face, though, told how much her brother's compliment meant to her. "Well, maybe I won't bother!" she said with a stubborn stance. "Maybe I'll just tease you all to death." "Oh, please do! Please! Please!" begged Marty. Although totally different from his older brother, Marty's lanky good looks, easy-going personality, and burgeoning basketball fame already had him well up on the school stud list. Ellie took his praise very seriously. As did most family discussions, that one ended on a light note, and they all went about their business. ------- On the second Saturday morning in August, Terry's caseworker dropped him off at the Voss home. The entire family was there to greet him. By unspoken agreement, they all stood back and let Julie have first crack at him. She clung to him as she never had before, and cried her eyes out for several minutes as he hugged her and stroked her hair. When Julie released him and turned to the others in a little embarrassment, Terry was introduced to Ellie and Marty. Marty gave him a typical jock's greeting with the stylized handshake and a genuine grin. Ellie could barely stammer out 'Hi'. Betty was watching her daughter closely. She was not surprised by Ellie's reaction, but she was concerned. The girl was truly smitten. Betty knew better than to disbelieve in love at first sight. Now she just had to minimize the damage. Terry was undoubtedly centerfold material. From what Betty knew of his personality, she was sure Ellie would fall even harder once she got to know him. The problem was, what if he did not reciprocate? What would that do to a girl who already had serious self-image problems because of her size? And what if he also fell for Ellie? How would they handle a torrid teenaged romance under their roof? Would they try to keep them from having sex? Would they just let them cohabit? 'Hold on, Betty' she chided herself. 'You're getting way ahead of things. They are two good, level-headed kids. Things will work out'. ------- Theresa had not tried to make contact with Terry in the first few days, knowing that she would only be rebuffed. She had gotten together $1000 in cash which she insisted Betty take as a fund to buy essentials for Terry. Tempted to refuse, even though cash was always tight at the Voss home, Betty realized how critically important the money was to Theresa's fragile ego. It allowed her to feel that she had some part in caring for her son, and every scrap was meaningful to her. On Sunday, Terry's second day out, Betty took him to buy cosmetics and other supplies. Ellie wanted to come along, but Betty waved her off with a meaningful look. After the brief shopping was done, they sat in a coffee shop, and Betty got to the real reason for the trip. "Terry, you are probably aware that Ellie has fallen for you head over heels." "Yeah, I kinda noticed the look. Mrs. Voss, I..." "It's Betty, please!" "Betty, I'm sure you are concerned about having me in the same house with Ellie, but..." "There is only one thing I am concerned about, Terry, and that is Ellie's heart. She has a terrible self-image problem." "What?" he sputtered. "She's a total babe! And a swimming star besides. How could she have a self-image problem?" "God, I wish I had recorded this conversation. Ellie would never believe you said that," Betty said, shaking her head. "I speak from experience because Ellie is almost an exact copy of me. We were both ugly ducklings until well after puberty. Once you have been unattractive, it is hard to believe that you have changed. Despite the best efforts of her dad and her brothers, she still doesn't believe it." "But the guys at school..." Terry started to say. "Too many of the guys at school remember the ugly duckling. And since she is tall and athletic, a lot of the guys are intimidated. Some are probably convinced she is lesbian. I assure you, she is not." "Whew! That's a relief!" Terry said, grinning. "Why? Are you interested in Ellie, romantically?" "Betty, I just met her. I mean, really met her. God, this is weird! Talking about my interest in a girl with her mother." Terry was shaking his head, but it was clear he was not upset. "Look, even Julie does not know this, but I, uh, have had some experience with girls." "How old your first time?" Betty asked matter-of-factly. Terry blinked in astonishment, shook his head, then replied softly "Fourteen." "Do you have a steady, or one special girl?" "No. I never have had. They are all - oops, I gave something away there, didn't I - they are all good friends. There is no commitment." "Will they still be your friends after..." "Yes. They are real friends. They are the kind of friends I could use to stay away from home, if you know what I mean." "Hmmmm. I feel a little bad about telling stories on my daughter, but this is not a normal situation. Ellie is totally inexperienced with boys. Alan and Glen take her on dates regularly, and she has become a very good dancer. But she has never had a real date. Do you see why I wanted to have this little chat?" "Do you think it would be better if I didn't take her on any dates? 'Course I don't have any money for dating, anyway, but..." "From what Julie has told me about you and what I have seen, you read people very well and are respectful of them. I just don't want Ellie to be hurt." "Honestly, Betty, I laid awake last night thinking about Ellie, wondering if it was right to be anything more than another brother to her. You said she is a carbon copy of you?" "Pretty much," Betty answered. "Well, the idea of waking up with someone just like you twenty years from now seems awfully good to me." Betty somehow avoided a swoon, but she was pretty sure her blush gave away her reaction. The funny thing was, it didn't sound like a line. She had a feeling that he really meant it. All of a sudden, her biggest desire was for this young man to fall in love with her daughter. Noticing that Betty was unable to reply, Terry sensed that he had overstepped. "I'm sorry, that was too bold, wasn't it. Look, I can tell you that I really like Ellie, already. I promise to treat her very carefully. I won't pretend anything for her that I don't honestly feel." By that time, Betty was able to nod. Then, he startled her once again. "Do you have any, uh, rules? I mean, things you don't want me to do around the house - with Ellie. If we get, uh, really close, you know?" "This is probably a terrible thing for a mother of the girl to say, but if you two somehow end up honestly in love and committed for the long haul, rules would be stupid." Finally, she was able to shock him. He was still several up on her, though. The next several months were going to be very interesting, indeed. ------- Chapter 9 The next few weeks before the start of school were a period of great adjustment at the Voss home. Julie and Glen were still struggling to adjust to their new reality, bumping into disappointments and new challenges almost daily. They loved each other deeply, and were both doing their best to make their relationship work. Both recognized the missing passion and closeness. Each felt the fault was theirs, and neither would mention their feelings to the other. Glen was working a full night shift at the grocery store while taking a course load his advisor considered ridiculous. That meant that during the scarce hours he had to spend with Julie, he was seldom at his brightest. In addition, he always worked the weekend nights to free up as much of the week as possible for classes and study. He was a fanatic about study. He told everyone that if all he could get was a degree from a third-rate school, he at least had to have perfect grades for any chance of a decent job. Even then it would be hard. Exercise was such an integral part of his life that Glen got in a solid swimming workout at least three times a week. That irritated Julie at first, until Betty had a heart-to-heart with her. "Julie, Honey, you know I try to stay out of things between you and Glen. Can I say something about his swimming?" "Sure, Betty. I know you don't meddle, and I appreciate it." "I know his time is scarce, and I can understand why you resent him spending it swimming. He always goes when you are working, but he could spend the time studying so he had more free for you. I know that." "The thing is, without exercise, he wouldn't really be Glen. It has always been a part of him. I know, because I'm the same way. If he let himself go, I don't think you would like him very much." "There's one other thing about swimming. You should be glad he will still do it. Remember at first, when he broke up at just the mention of it? I don't know if he still has a scrap of his dream tucked away somewhere, but I hope he does. That dream is part of what makes him Glen, too." Julie had to fight with all her might to keep her composure when Betty talked about her son's dream, and keeping a scrap of it alive. That was the dream that she had stolen. That was what denied the closeness that she wanted Glen for in the first place. She did a rapid attitude change, and from then on honestly encouraged his swimming workouts. On a few weekends, she even suggested they go together. She did extract a promise from Glen to take a lighter load the winter quarter when the baby was due. He agreed with surprising willingness. His drive to get his degree did not exceed his desire to experience fatherhood to the fullest. The job at the furniture store turned out to be the best thing that could happen for Julie. Very quickly she was pressed into some emergency sales duties, and showed that she had inherited something positive from Vince. She was a natural, and before the summer was over, she was on the floor full time. This did not result in as much net income as she would have liked, however, since the wardrobe demands ate up a lot of her early commissions. All in all, though, she was optimistic that she would more than hold her own for getting them out of their financial hole. Ellie had to fight to act normally. She was absolutely head over heels for Terry - the first love of her life. When Betty took her to the OB/Gyn for a pill subscription, it did nothing to dampen her ardor. "Honey, this is just a good precaution for a girl your age. I'm not doing it because I expect you to sleep with Terry." "But you didn't worry about it before," Ellie replied. Then, sobering, she lamented "But I don't even know if he likes me. He's so nice, and everything, but nothing, you know, romantic. You've talked to him, Mom. Does he like me?" "I think you can tell he likes you, just because he's nice to you, Ellie." "You know what I mean! Does he like me like a girlfriend?" "If it was him asking about you, would you want me to tell him?" "Sure! I'd want him to know. Maybe the wondering would at least be over." Berating herself for the bad tactic, Betty told her "I'm sorry, Honey. I just can't betray his confidence." "No, I guess you couldn't. Not even just once? Please?" But she was grinning as she begged, and gave her mother a hug. Ellie thrilled at every moment she could be with Terry. He was as nice to her as could be: courteous, respectful, helpful, complimentary, fun. What he was not was romantic, and that frustrated her. It did not help her self-image situation, either. She worried that she was just not attractive enough to interest him THAT way. Ellie also worried about Terry's well-being a lot. Anyone could see that he was troubled. Terry fought hard to hide his true feelings for Ellie and not do anything to lead her on. He was just a recreational swimmer, but he started going with her to the club for her workouts. It was torture watching her awesome body moving in the revealing tank suit, but he could see how much his presence pleased her, so he kept torturing himself. Quite often, Betty and Glen went to the club at the same time. Having Betty there gave Terry a reason to tear his eyes off of Ellie. That really just made things worse, though. Every look at Betty just made him think more about how wonderful a life with Ellie would be. He knew it was silly for a high school senior to be thinking in those terms, but the idea of marriage and home had an exceptionally strong pull on him. It was his chance to make up for what he had been deprived of as he grew up. Ellie took every opportunity to just sit and talk with Terry, and that was torture for him, too. She was so energetic and animated, and there was none of the inane teenaged prattle. They really talked, and he began to admire her mind as much as her body and her personality. Nearly every night in bed, Terry decided to just let go and show his true feelings for Ellie. The decision was always rescinded quickly, though. His thoughts would turn to his parents, and the anger and hate would boil up. He had to protect Ellie from that. Fortunately, Terry found a way to vent his frustration from the torture of being around Ellie but not being truly with her. Alan and Marty started working to finish the basement as soon as Terry arrived. Terry had never done any carpentry, but he asked if there was any way he could help. From the first simple tasks he was given, Terry was fascinated. He found true satisfaction in watching the area take shape, and also discovered an unsuspected aptitude. He was a naturally methodical, organized person, and a perfectionist. He had good manual dexterity and spatial perception. With a speed that surprised Alan, he learned the necessary techniques, and Alan was able to leave the project to the boys. After only two weeks, Marty and Terry went to Alan with a proposal. "Dad," Marty led off, "you know those two basement jobs you had to turn down? Well, how about Terry and I take them on and you just come by every day to supervise and inspect. I know we could still get them." "How do you know that?" "I've, uh, stopped and talked to both of them. They want us or nobody." "But school's about to start." "That's OK. Terry needs a job, and he never takes long for homework." "But basketball..." "Doesn't start for several weeks. By then, Terry can carry most of the load." Marty was selling hard, now. He had more of an entrepreneurial streak than his dad, and had dreamed of a real construction business of his own. He and Terry had bonded instantly, and were fast becoming a very proficient team. Terry seemed to know what he could not do well and didn't mind relying on Marty until he learned. The quality image that Alan had established was in no danger of eroding with the boys. The boys' being diverted to outside jobs meant that the basement would not be finished as quickly for Julie and Glen to move down there. Julie, elated that Terry had found an interest and a source of cash, was the first to assure him that they were fine in Glen's room. Truthfully, she found the closeness to the others rather comforting, a feeling of family that she was just enjoying for the first time. Besides his feelings for Ellie, Terry had another big problem in the early weeks. Theresa began calling the house at least daily, trying to talk to him. He quietly went to each family member and told them that he absolutely would not talk to her. He stopped answering the phone, and whoever picked up Theresa's calls relayed his refusal as gently as they could. It did not stop Theresa's increasingly frantic calls, and it all came to a head just a week before school started. ------- Knowing that the Vosses never locked their back door when they were home, Theresa parked a couple of houses away, and came at their lot from the back. She was so nervous she was shaking, but she was also so determined to talk to her son that nothing would stop her, even... well, she hoped it would not come to that. She was glad she had worn sneakers, even if they were too hot on such a warm evening. They protected her feet as she walked through some wild brush. When she reached the back of the house, she was about to go right in, but instead, looked in through the kitchen window. She could see everyone seated at the dining room table. Terry's back was to her, but it still made her heart flutter just to see him from behind. It looked like they were still busy eating, so she decided to wait until they were all done, or at least nearly so. It turned out to take only five or six minutes, but it seemed like hours before Betty got up and brought a platter into to the kitchen. 'Surely Betty would understand', Theresa reasoned, and she slipped quietly in through the door. Just as Betty looked up and saw her, Theresa put her finger to her lips, pleading for silence. More than the gesture, the longing in Theresa's eyes convinced Betty not to give away the distraught mother's presence. When Theresa got completely inside, Betty held up her own hand, then one finger, signaling that Theresa should wait one minute. Betty then went back to her seat and casually re-entered the conversation. She did not like being involved in trickery, but she was firmly convinced that it was to everyone's benefit for mother and son to start talking. Julie was sitting next to Terry, with Glen, so Theresa entered from behind both of them. Betty was sitting at the end of the table nearest the kitchen door, but since she knew what was about to happen, she pretended not to notice Theresa's presence. Ellie, Marty, and Alan, however, saw her immediately, and their expressions of surprise alerted Terry, Julie, and Glen. As soon as he saw his mother, Terry began to get up, but Julie beat him to it and forcefully held him down. He clearly could have risen despite his sister's restraint, but he acceded to her wishes and sat back down. He did, however, pointedly look away from Theresa. Theresa came around behind Betty so she was facing Terry. "T... Terry, p... please! Can I talk to you?" she stammered out. He said nothing and kept his face turned away. There was absolute silence for many seconds, then she spoke again in a pleading tone. "Isn't... isn't there anything I can d... do to get you to t... talk to me?" Every since he arrived, Julie had been talking to Terry about their mother. She had described the unbelievable changes that had occurred. She had explained her own feelings: how there was still a good deal of hatred and distrust, but also a little pity. Over and over, but as gently as possible, she had told him he that needed to talk with her to get any victory over his own anger. Terry had listened to his sister, usually without comment. He knew what she said was true, but he did not want to let go of the anger. When things at the Center were at their worst, it was the anger that helped him get through. It was almost like an old friend. He could not imagine his mother any way but the brawling, smothering person who had driven him to drugs. In truth, he did not want to think of her any other way because it might make the anger harder to summon up. After another long pause with no response from Terry and no sound from any of the others, Theresa gave a visible shudder and made her decision. For a moment, she waffled, once again wondering why her action would make any difference to Terry. But she had thrashed that all out in her mind beforehand, endlessly. If she didn't talk to him now, she would go crazy. Steeling herself, Theresa abruptly pulled off the golf shirt she was wearing. Other than that one time horrible time with Glen, no male but Vince and her doctors had even seen her in her underwear - well, not since high school, anyway. Now, Alan and Marty sat staring at her in complete shock. Her face and the skin on her upper chest were bright red with her embarrassment, but she did not stop. In mere seconds, she had pushed down and stepped out of the skirt she wore, leaving her standing in bra, panties, and sneakers. Recovering from his shock, Alan looked over at Marty and motioned with his eyes that they should leave. Marty quickly stood, turned away from Theresa and left the room. Alan and Glen were right on his heels. Betty stood, put her hand on Theresa's shoulder, and gave a light squeeze. She still held a lot of animosity toward the woman because of what she had done to Julie and Terry. But she could understand the desperation that could make a mother take such a step. As she left, she signaled to Ellie, who was able to recover enough to join her. Racing to beat the loss of her nerve, Theresa almost threw off her bra, then quickly stripped off her panties. She was stepping out of her shoes when Terry looked over to see what was happening. He gasped and rose again to leave, pointedly turning away from his mother again. Julie rose right with him and hugged him firmly. "Terry, it's time. Please. I think you know what it took for her to strip. Talk to her. For me. For all of us." Terry sagged back into his chair, still not looking at his mother, who stood quivering in shame and fear as Julie left the room. She did not say anything, but waited him out. Finally, he turned and looked at her, his gaze fixed on her face. "This is not for everyone to hear," Terry said in the first words to his mother in many months. "Let's go down to my room." Obediently, glad of any action, Theresa stooped to pick up her clothes. "Leave them!" Terry's voice cracked out sternly. She jerked upright in surprise and confusion, then seemed to decide she had no choice. On her visit with Betty and Alan, they had shown her the basement where Terry would be staying, and she padded unsteadily toward the stairway. Terry followed her down the stairs, noticing the gooseflesh on her back and shoulders as the temperature dropped while they descended. Theresa noticed the coolness as well, and her nipples would have stiffened, except that they were already hard as rocks since she first began undressing. After seeing the effects of the cool air on his mother's skin, Terry's eyes naturally tracked to her ass. Despite his anger and confusion, he could not help noticing the attractive womanly flair of her hips from her admirably small waist. As his eyes lingered for a few steps, he could feel the undulation of her full, surprisingly smooth ass cheeks drawing him in. With a quick shake of his head, he forced his gaze downward to her legs. It startled him that they looked almost girlish, much tighter and smoother than he would have expected for her age. In his bedroom, Terry turned a chair toward the bed and sat on it, motioning his mother to sit on the bed. When she was seated, arms almost painfully held at her sides to expose her breasts, he ran his eyes over her body for the first time that she could notice and asked "Why?" After asking his question, he continued his perusal of her body, purposely making it obvious, trying to upset her. He had to admit to himself that she had a fine body, especially at forty-something. In his mind, she had always been a cranky old hag because of her actions toward him. Her treatment of him literally stifled the normal curiosity of a son about his mother's body. Instead of upsetting her, he was the one shaken by his examination. "I've been dying to talk to you, you know that," she answered, jarring him from his brief reverie. "No, I mean why naked?" "A... after she found out she was p... pregnant, Julie wouldn't talk to us unless we were naked. She seemed to need that as a sign we were serious. I thought maybe you..." "So you hoped I would get distracted by your body?" Terry knew very well she was incapable of that strategy. He also knew how modest she was. He was frankly awed by her action. Whatever impression she had made, though, he could not resist inflicting pain in any way he could. Thus, the crack about distracting him. "No. You know I'm modest. I hope this shows how badly I want to talk to you. I had to convince you I wasn't hiding anything; I wasn't pretending. Would I do this if I was trying to fool you?" Still in the mood to hurt her, he spat out "So what did you want to say?" She had not known just what to expect, but the bitterness in his words stunned her for a moment. "I... I need to tell you that I know how wrong I have been all these years. I know how much I've hurt you, and..." "No, you don't know!" he nearly shouted, something she had never heard him do. "You have no idea how much you hurt me," he continued in a much more controlled voice. "There is no way you can feel what I went through. You never even thought about whether I felt anything." "You're right, I never thought about what you felt," she agreed, momentarily silencing him. "But I think I do know how much I hurt you." "How could you?" he asked with a derisive snort. "For one thing, I have lost my children, who now hate me. What could be more painful for a mother? Besides that, your father is now treating me as we always treated you. I am getting a taste of what you lived through. It's terrible!" His anger somewhat quenched by her sincerity, they talked calmly for a few minutes. At first, Theresa was so distracted by his scanning of her body that she found it difficult to talk. It felt like she could feel exactly where his eyes were tracking. Initially, it was all around her breasts, and her nipples reacted as if to a physical touch. She unconsciously squeezed her legs tighter together when she felt his gaze move toward her crotch. After a minute or two, she was able to gain enough control to look at him in an appraising way. She almost swooned at the changes she saw. In the almost seven months since she had last seen him, all traces of boyishness had vanished. His body looked beefy and solid. His face was that of a man, but an old and sad man. She was momentarily stunned by the realization that she had almost never looked her son straight in the eyes - he would always look away. Now, he stared into her eyes so steadfastly and intensely that she was the one who turned away. What she saw in his eyes made her tremble. She saw pain, anger, and sadness, and also a great deal of determination. But what she did not see hurt her the most: there was no trace of love, or even pity. For some reason, Terry tired of the rather idle chatter and went into attack mode again. "I assume Dad has not changed at all," he stated as a fact. "I'm afraid not," Theresa admitted with a shaky voice. "And how do I know you have really changed?" "Would I be here like this if I hadn't?" she asked with a touch of irritation. "How would I know?" he responded. "With the way you two used to carry on, you couldn't have been all that modest." That remark from him stung, but he did not let up. "It was just an example of how little you cared about us: the way you would be fighting, then all of a sudden you would be upstairs fucking like crazy, moaning and screaming." She sucked in her breath when he said that, but he still did not stop. "It didn't matter a bit if we were embarrassed or upset. That wasn't modest. Maybe strutting around naked is really no big deal to you." "But I... we... Ohhhh!" Tears were streaming down her cheeks now. At that point, the blood lust overtook him. He was hurting her and it felt good. He could not stop himself. "Go ahead, show me what got Dad so worked up. Lay back and spread your legs. Do it! Now!" She was stunned, both at his fury and at the humiliation of his request. Just as she was about to bolt from the room, she remembered the anguish of having no contact with him. She could not go back to that! It would kill her! Hardly believing her own actions, she forced herself to flop backward, then with a supreme effort of will, she spread her legs as wide as they would go. Once spread and displayed, her own emotions took over. The familiar frenzy of the battle lust began to take over. She had vowed she would never go there again, but in her emotional state, she did not have that much control. Surrendering to the frenzy, she screamed between sobs, "There! Does that make you believe me? Is this enough humiliation to get you to talk to me? What more can I do?" She paused for several wrenching sobs. Then she reached between her legs and spread her outer lips. "Why don't you fuck me? Would that help you get even? I know you think I fucked you over hundreds of times! Go ahead! Put it in there and pound me!" There was another pause for sobs. "This is what upset you, isn't it? So, just do it! Hurt me! I deserve it!" By this point, Terry was frozen in shock, but Theresa was not done. The frenzy had complete control of her, now. Just as in the familiar battles of old, she was conscious and aware, but something else was driving her words. This time, though, she was not trying to win a battle. This frenzy was driven by guilt. She was punishing herself, and she was merciless. There was one more thing driving her frenzy, one she would never acknowledge, but a very strong one: her sexual attraction to her son. That attraction was no small factor in her desperation to see him and talk to him. She would never admit to it, and would never consciously act on it, but it was definitely there. "Come on!" she shrieked. "What are you waiting for? You must want to fuck me! After hearing your Dad do it all those times, don't you want your chance?" She stuck two fingers into her vagina and began pumping them in and out vigorously. Suddenly, she flipped over and crawled farther onto the bed. Then, on her knees, she spread her legs wide apart. She put her face down on the bed and reached back with both hands to spread her ass cheeks. "Would it help to fuck my ass? Go ahead, jam it in dry! Rip up my asshole! Make me bleed! Would you believe me then? Would you talk to me then?" She then launched into a solid stream of crude and profane language that Terry had never heard from her, even during the most heated battles. Before long, she fell to her side, still talking, but lapsing into unintelligible babble once in a while. Her hands were jammed between her legs, and Terry saw her start to frig herself. He was amazed at the suddenness with which she exploded into an orgasm. She did not stop, and about a minute later, when she shuddered through another one, Terry heard a gasp and snapped his head around to see Julie looking on in utter disbelief. The two siblings looked at each other and each saw the horror reflected in the other's eyes. Too paralyzed to act, they both turned back and watched as their mother convulsed through two or three more orgasms, her words becoming less and less intelligible by the second. Finally, she flopped onto her back, legs and arms spread, head swinging from side to side, eyes closed, issuing pathetic moans punctuated by barely understandable words. "Get her covered and keep her warm!" Julie ordered. "She's going to go into shock! I'm going to call her doctor!" Giving him no chance to argue, she bolted from the room. He did not want to touch his mother. Truthfully, he did not want to be anywhere near her. But Julie proved prophetic, and Theresa started to shake. The compassionate human part of Terry took over at that point. He hurriedly pulled the heavy comforter that acted as a bedspread over her. The shakes got worse, though, and Terry felt some panic rise. He had never been faced with anything like this before. The woman shaking under the covers ceased to be the mother who had tormented him all his life. Instead, she was a person in real danger, and he was the only one who could help. Hurrying to a wardrobe that served as his temporary closet, he got the spare blanket and tucked that around her as tightly as he could. The shakes did not ease up, even after the additional blanket, and he had just gotten onto the bed and wrapped his arms around her when Julie came crashing down the stairs, closely followed by Betty. "Alan's filling the tub upstairs. Get under the covers and hold her close. I'll help." Betty frantically pulled the covers aside and, looking quickly at Terry, she tore off her T-shirt and shorts, stepped out of her sandals, and pressed her body to Theresa's. "Get your shirt off and get behind her, she snapped at Terry." After a moment's hesitation, he complied. Betty reached over the squirming, mumbling Theresa and touched Terry's cheek. She did not say anything, but the encouragement helped. They lay in that sandwich formation for several minutes until Alan yelled from the top of the stairs "Tub's full enough. Need help carrying her?" Strangely, the idea of another man carrying his naked mother upset Terry. "I've got her," he shouted out. "We can't let the cold air get to her," Betty told him. Surprising Terry with her strength, she rolled Theresa over. Suddenly, his mother's naked breasts were plastered against his chest. Betty gave a quick smirk at his gasp, but stuck to business. "Pick her up and I'll keep the blanket tight around her. Julie, help keep her legs covered." In other circumstances, the situation might have been arousing, or at least shocking to Terry. But with Theresa's constant moaning and babbling, and her shuddering and writhing, all he felt was alarm. As quickly as they could navigate the stairways, the three of them got the stricken woman, tightly wrapped and held snugly against her son's chest, up to the tub in the common bath on the second floor. Alan remained outside while Julie and Betty unwrapped her and helped Terry lower her into the hot water. Conscious of the level of tension, Betty quipped "Guess there's no point in you leaving now, is there Terry?" "God!" was the only reaction he could make. The three sat by the tub for several minutes, anxiously watching Theresa. Terry kept his hand behind her head, keeping her face clear of the water, which was splashing out onto the floor from her hardest thrashing. "She really is quite beautiful, isn't she?" Julie asked softly. "You know, I honestly never thought about what she looked like," Terry said. "I know that sounds unbelievable for a son not to look at his mother, but I was always so upset at what she did..." "Alan, come on in here," Betty called out, to the surprise of Julie and Terry. "Oh, but she's..." Alan sputtered as he walked in then turned quickly to leave. "Get back here and take a good look," Betty said with a laugh, while Julie and Terry stared in disbelief. "You are such a faithful husband. You never go to strip bars or read nudie magazines. I'm giving you a little reward. Theresa is a good-looking woman. She was going to strip right in front of you anyway, so there's no harm." Betty was watching the siblings' reactions very closely. Julie looked up at Alan, saw his eyes fixed on her mother, and grinned. Terry said nothing, but did not look at all pleased. Finally, the shivering and thrashing subsided, but what followed was almost more frightening. She opened her eyes, but never focused on any of them. She continued to spout word-like sounds, almost none of which were recognizable. In a very serious tone, Betty told them, "Folks, I think this is a breakdown. Julie, call Dr. Waxman back and let her know we're taking her to the hospital. Alan, you call her husband and tell him what happened. Leave out the part about stripping." "But I didn't see what happened downstairs, " Alan objected. "OK, here's the 'for Vince' version of it," and Betty gave him the story as he should relay it. ------- Much later, Glen had left for work, and Betty, Alan, Julie, and Terry were sitting and talking. "I have to apologize," Betty said. "That was a nasty trick calling Alan into the bathroom. I did it to test you guys." Both siblings just looked at her in puzzlement. "I wanted to see how you would react to her being purposely put on display. It was... not very nice of me." "Wow!" Julie breathed. "You should try for Julia's job." "For all your kindness and consideration, Julie, you seemed to relish her being ogled," Betty observed. "It helped me understand even better how deep your dislike for her is." "Yeah, it's pretty deep," Julie admitted softly. "But part of it was being happy that Alan got a free peek. He deserves it." With that, she got up and gave the blushing man a very cozy hug. "Terry, you were definitely not happy about it," Betty says. "That tells me your feelings for your mother are deeper than you will even admit." "I don't agree with you, Betty," Terry replied. "If it was some woman off of the street, I would have been just as displeased. A woman should not be made a spectacle like that." Betty stared at him in shock for a moment, then her eyes teared up. "I'm so sorry, Terry. Please forgive me. That was an awful thing to do. I... I... I'm sorry." In that moment, Betty wanted Terry for her daughter even more than before, if that was possible. For his part, Terry was completely caught off guard by an adult woman, his surrogate mother, admitting fault and asking for forgiveness. It was an unprecedented experience for him. As he thought about it, though, Terry remembered that earlier that same evening, his real mother, sitting naked in front of him, had admitted to how wrong she had been for all those years. She had not asked for forgiveness, but probably only because she knew it would be impossible. Perhaps Betty's little test was sadly misguided, but it had brought something important to his attention - something significant really had changed with his mother. ------- As Betty and Alan were finally getting to bed, Betty put her light robe on over nothing else, and told Alan "Don't fall asleep, Lover. I'm really going to need you in a few minutes." "Where..." "There's another guy that needs a reward." "You mean Marty? You're going to... No?" "Yup!" and she walked out. As she expected, with all the excitement, Marty was still up, reading in bed. After a brief stop in the bathroom, she walked into his room, switched on the overhead light, took off her robe, and tossed it over his desk chair. Marty could only stare, frozen in shock. "Marty, I am so proud of you," she said, trying to keep her voice steady and casual. "You were so respectful tonight when Mrs. Menconi started to strip. You left without even looking back." "But, why... ?" he stammered. "You had a chance to see a naked woman who was purposely baring herself to you, yet you walked away to keep from embarrassing her further. That showed incredible maturity for a young guy. Because you didn't take the chance when you could have, I'm giving you another chance. I hope I'm an OK substitute for Mrs. Menconi." "Oh, God!" was the most he could get out. Shivering from nerves, Betty started moving slowly about the room, pretending to check out different objects while making sure he got good looks at every possible angle. "Of course, you probably get to see lots of tight little high school bodies naked, huh. My big ole bod probably doesn't compare with theirs, but I hope you think this is a little reward." "Oh, Mom, you're... you're," then he was reduced to another "Oh, God!" Betty spent fifteen minutes in her youngest son's room, giving him the best possible chance to examine her in detail. She did not give him any lewd porno poses, but at one point she sat on his bed with one leg curled under her and the other on the floor. Without looking down to check on herself, she was pretty sure he had a good, clear view of her labia, which were quite moist and engorged. Another time, she bent over to pick up something off of the floor. She was facing directly away from him, and her legs were straight and slightly spread. It should have been a good anatomy lesson. When she thought it had been enough, Betty sat on the bed again and took his chin in one hand. "You are so much like your father, and I couldn't be happier about it. I love you, Marty." With that, she gave him a brief but firm kiss right on the mouth. Then, drawing another gasp from him, she put her hand right on his hard cock and said. "I hoped this would happen. Here, you'll need this." She handed him a washrag that she had surreptitiously pulled from the pocket of her robe. On that light note, she stood, grabbed her robe, and strutted naked from his room. By the time Betty reached the master bedroom, she was almost sprinting. As she burst through the door, she told Alan "I hope you've been getting ready, 'cause I need it right now!" She threw back the covers and breathed out "Yessss!" as she saw his cock trying to reach the ceiling. At some risk of damaging the object of her frenzy, she fairly leaped atop him. Holding herself above him on her strong thighs, she grasped his cock with one hand and positioned it at her opening. With the other hand, she spread open her lips to ease his entry. Seemingly in a panic, she bounced up and down a few times to get him all the way in. With a loud, satisfied sigh, she bottomed out, then began a vigorous up and down motion, grunting unashamedly on each downstroke. It took him only three strokes to get into the rhythm and begin thrusting back just as forcefully. This was a coupling of need, and they both did their best to get her over. Because of the accumulated stimuli of the unbelievable evening, she was on a much shorter trigger than usual. When she came, it was a very strong one, leaving her limp and panting, resting on his chest. "Was he blown away," he asked her. "Uh huh. Mad?" she panted back. "Mad? Of course not," he assured her. "I was sure surprised at first, but you know what?" "What?" That still about the limit of her speech ability. "This guy is just smart enough to know better than to question anything this babe does about the kids or about sex. I'm happy for Marty. It should be the thrill of his life." She had recovered her breath very quickly. "You smooth talking devil, you! The edge is off, now fuck my brains out." He had not yet come, and was still rigid inside of her. They rolled over smoothly and he wasted no time working on her demand. ------- In the morning, Betty watched closely for Marty to get up. When he went into the bathroom, she waited long enough for him to finish peeing, then walked right in. He was standing in the shorts he slept in in warm weather, while she wore a Tee and panties. She walked right up to him and wrapped him in a hug. "I wanted to make sure my little show last night wasn't going to cause any problems between us. It was something I thought you deserved, and something I wanted to do. Are you OK with it?" "Yeah, Mom. I'm OK. More than OK, really. I couldn't even manage to tell you how gorgeous you are. But you are, you know?" "Well thank you, Sir. A woman never gets tired of hearing that. I just want you to know Marty, that I don't consider a little incidental nakedness to be a big deal between us. I'm not going to parade around in the buff, and neither are you. But if we happen to see each other, we'll just enjoy it and not get bent out of shape, OK? Maybe sometime we'll skinny dip up at the cabin." She turned to leave, but he spun her back around and hugged her fiercely. "Did I tell you lately how lucky I am to have you for a Mom?" he asked. Betty had to leave quickly before her moist eyes became obvious. ------- Late the next afternoon, Dr. Julia Waxman called and asked to talk with Terry. She asked him to come in for a session. Not sure why, he agreed, and she asked him to come right over. "First of all," Julia started in, "tell me your account of what happened last night. Please, don't leave anything out, even if you don't think it is important. You are not my patient, but since I am talking to you in regard to your mother, her confidentiality guarantee extends to you. And don't hold anything back because of guilt or embarrassment. I am not here to judge you, and there is almost nothing I haven't heard before." Terry instantly liked the beautiful doctor. He wondered why he never had the chance to speak with someone so brilliant and forthright before. He found it easy to spill the tale, even his own actions that he was definitely not proud of. When he had spent twenty minutes on his account, interspersed with a number of questions, Julia asked him "Do you feel any differently about you mother after last night?" After a moment's thought, he answered "Well, I believe she has changed, and I believe she knows exactly what she has done wrong. I even believe she is sorry." "Anything else?" "She is quite a beautiful woman. I honestly never noticed before." "Are you more willing to have some kind of a relationship with her now?" Julia asked the key question. "No, not at all," he said, quickly and firmly. "Really? Why not?" "The question is why should I feel different. Just because she is sorry? Just because she has a sexy body? Just because she had a breakdown?" "Not even because she is you mother?" "Look," he said, with a good deal of emotion, "I have never felt that she was my mother in the sense that I knew lots of my friends' mothers. She may have given birth to me, but it takes more than that." "But your parents provided for you quite well. They thought they were being good parents," she needled. "It's results that count," he replied. "Good intentions don't count for shit. Sorry! Bad habit from my time inside." "That's not a new word to me," she said, trying to ease back the intensity with a grin. He just kept rolling. "In my mind, she decided she did not want me for a son when they sentenced me to that place." "But you're the one who took the drugs." "If she's your patient," he pointed out, "I'm sure she has explained exactly what drove me to that. Sure, I was stupid. I was weak. But I was desperate, too. Everyone knows there was no reason for me to be sent there, except for their stubbornness and pride." "But it was your father who refused counseling, wasn't it?" "She never once tried to persuade him. Not once!" Just the way he said it told her volumes about the depth of betrayal he felt. "So, the center was pretty bad, huh?" she asked. He stared hard at her for quite a while before he spoke. "No one else knows this, and I am trusting your confidentiality. My sister has it on paper, but she doesn't know what she has." He proceeded to give Julia the complete story, finding it cathartic to finally let it out. When he finished talking, she scribbled some notes, then looked at him with a troubled expression. "You have put me in a tough spot," she told him. "Why?" "I cannot repeat what you told me. At the same time, I now know of serious violations of the law, and of every moral code I believe in. Will you allow me to tell what happened to you?" "Not until I'm eighteen." "Why?" "Then the center can't get at me any more. That organization is not something to fuck around with. Oops! Sorry again! Word is that more than one kid has been killed by them." Julia looked very grim, then sighed as her shoulders sagged in resignation. "How much can I tell your mother, other than what happened inside?" "Whatever you want. I don't care." "That's good. You see, just having you here is a problem. Technically, I'm not supposed to tell your mother I talked to you. But I have to bill the time." "You mean this is not pro... whatever?" "Not on your life! I don't..." Julia clamped her mouth shut before she could say something inappropriate. Terry seemed to have a talent for making people say what they really did not want to say. Actually chuckling, Terry said "It's OK, Doc. You could never pay me enough to get tangled up with our family. I just wish..." Then it was his turn to bite off what he was about to say. The two looked at each other for quite a few seconds. Then, Julia drew a big breath and told him "For the benefit of my patient, I must ask you if you will agree to keep contact with her." "Why can't we just go our own ways and forget about each other. I don't want to communicate with her!" "Terry, after what happened last night, I probably should have her committed. Baring herself before you like that is certainly extreme behavior. Exhibitionism of that sort is a surprisingly common occurrence in cases of severe self-loathing and depression." "But you're not going to?" "No. If she is put away, it will guarantee her worst fear - permanent separation from you. On the other hand, I'm afraid if you don't let her have some contact with you, she WILL end up in an institution." "Well, she put ME in an institution!" He was now showing more emotion then at any other time during the session. Professional that she was, Julia found herself once again struggling valiantly not to react to his statement. After a pause to compose herself, she told him. "I don't think you are a callous, vindictive person, Terry." "How do you know what kind of a person I am?" he asked, still showing lots of emotion. "I don't even know!" "I've spent a lot of time with your mother, and she talks about you endlessly," Julia explained, trying to squeeze as much out of him as she could. It was no longer any use pretending he was just a resource for her patient Theresa. She was openly trying to find out more about him. He interrupted her with "My mother knows less about me than anyone, except my father, that is." "Living with someone for seventeen years, you get to know them pretty well," Julia parried. "She never lived with me," he responded, now very agitated in his chair. "She lived with the 'at home version of Terry'. He was like a robot that I built to survive in that madhouse. He had no feelings that could be hurt. He never questioned anything that was said, and he never broke any rules, except for the ones that were made up too fast for him to know about. He stayed the Hell away from there as much as he possibly could." He was breathing hard after that disclosure. "I'm probably not supposed to tell you, but I've talked to Julie. She told me about you. Surely, she knows you better." "Julie tried her best, but she was a lot like them. She didn't know the Terry that my friends knew." "You speak in the past tense. Why?" she asked, pretty sure of what the answer would be. "That was the Terry that went in. Nobody knows the one that came out, even me." Sadly, that was just what Julia expected to hear. It was almost like someone opened a valve. Terry had gotten started, and he seemed to need to keep talking. "Let me tell you about the first pill I took - the one the started the whole fucking mess." He no longer bothered to apologize for the salty language. "Go ahead." "I was at one of my girlfriends' houses'. There were four girls I had been having sex with since I was fourteen. Nobody else but Betty knows that, not even Julie." "Why Betty? Why not Julie? I thought you two were close." "We were, but I was afraid she would spill it as a weapon in one of their insane fights. I told Betty because she needs to know. She is concerned about Ellie." "Why concerned?" "She told me Ellie has a major crush on me. She also has a self-image problem; God knows why. She's a big strong girl, but she's beautiful, and as sweet as they come. She's just like her mother, and..." "Sounds like you have a crush on her, too." "More than a crush. I could see spending my life with her, easily." "After knowing her such a short time?" "Have you met her? Betty? You can tell pretty quickly. Anyhow, it's never going to happen between us." "Why is that?" "I can't stick her with all my hate and anger and other shit. I wouldn't do that to her," he explained. "I'm a druggy. I'm damaged goods. That will always be with me." "But you're a juvenile. That information is sealed." "Yeah, right!" he snorted. "I'm sure you don't believe that." Her silence validated his cynicism. Deciding that line of inquiry was best avoided, Julia prompted him "You were going to tell me about your first pill." "Yeah. I was in bed with one girlfriend. I had just watched them raping Julie." "WHAAAAT?" "You know what I mean: that whole college shit. Anyway, we were going to make love, but I just started crying. She was a really good friend, and knew everything about me. She did everything she could, but after almost an hour, I still kept crying over anything she did or said. It was like I had no control of myself." "It sounds like you had a breakdown. Just like your mother last night." "Maybe. Anyhow, she gave me this pill. She didn't tell me what it was, but it made me feel better than I ever had. You can guess the rest." They talked for a few more minutes before Julia had to cut it off. As they stood to part, she asked "Terry, isn't there anything your mother can do so you will see her and talk with her?" With a mirthless laugh, he told her "Well, since she seems to have this crazy exhibitionist streak, she can shave her pussy and serve us all dinner naked. I'll see plenty of her - maybe I'll even talk to her." With another laugh, and a dismissive wave of his hand, he left her office. Julia sagged back into her chair, drained in a way she should never let herself be from a patient. The worst thing was that Frank was out of town, so there would be no healing pampering that night. She was not surprised at the situation between Theresa and her son. It was certainly not the first time she had seen such a badly sundered relationship. In fact, it was a frequent cause of many of the problems she dealt with. The bond between a mother and a son could be among the strongest ever between two people. Naturally, it should be. However, if that relationship ever went sour, it could so easily turn into the most acrimonious of all, worse even than between ex-spouses. That's where things were between Theresa and Terry. The problem was, only Terry felt that way. Theresa wanted things the way they were supposed to be. Julia doubted that Theresa could ever have what she so badly wanted. It was her task to get her patient's expectations in line with reality, and help her learn to live with drastically lowered expectations. Not being a mother was probably a good thing for dealing with patients like Theresa. If she had experienced emotions like that personally, she would have no hope of dealing with them in any clinical way. ------- Chapter 10 After being given an anti-anxiety drug, Theresa seemed to recover the next day. Julia kept her in the hospital for one more night, and scheduled a session with her for the following day. As they sat down together in Julia's office, Theresa took the initiative and said "I don't know what happened to me. I'm sorry to be such a problem." "Theresa, what happened to you the other night is just one symptom of a very serious problem. The situation between you and Terry is dangerous to your health." "The problem is, there is nothing between me and Terry," Theresa answered, eyes already moist. "Did you talk to him?" "Yes, I did. I have his permission to tell you that, and to tell you what we talked about." "All I want to know is will he see me again?" Theresa blurted out. "As things stand right now, I'm afraid not," Julia said as gently as she could. When Theresa started to cry, Julia went on, "Let's put that question off for a while. Tell me what you remember about the other night. Start with why you went there, and why you stripped. Tell me what you were thinking." Theresa got herself together enough to give her account, with Julia asking many questions. Julia's main focus was determining whether Theresa was safe to be released. She did not like to think about committing her, but the breakdown the other evening was a very serious signal. When they finished the account of the breakdown, Julia probed hard on Theresa's feelings about Terry. She was trying to gauge the importance of the relationship to the mother. She needed to know if Theresa would be destroyed if no long-term contact developed. The answer was frighteningly clear. Without certain contact with both of her children, Theresa would probably end up non-functional. The fact that any possible relationship would never be warm and loving seemed to have sunk in. It distressed her, but she understood why and could live with it. Total lack of contact with either of them would destroy her. Julia was also probing for indications of whether Theresa should be committed. Her exhibitionism and the accompanying breakdown weighed heavily in that direction. On the other hand, building some kind of a relationship with Terry was at least a focal point, something her patient badly needed. With the exception of her one fixation, Theresa seemed rational and functional enough. After all of her years in her practice, Julia thought that she had run into every possible psychological situation, often many times. She was intelligent enough to realize that it was good to have that complacency punctured by a case like Theresa's. There had honestly never been another patient with such a dramatic personality shift. From total self-assurance and self-absorption to pathetic dependency in a matter of weeks was one for the journals. As a rule, that kind of metamorphosis would not be considered positive. The redeeming factor with Theresa was her honest concern for the success and the well-being of her children. Of course, Theresa had always been concerned about those things, but for the wrong reasons. Before, they were important because they were what she and Vince had planned for the children. As long as they fit within the plans, they were good children, and she and Vince were successful as parents. Julie's and Terry's personal feelings and desires were hardly factored in. Theresa would be horrified at the suggestion that she had not loved her children before. Julia had seen love in many permutations and distortions. That Theresa's concept of love had evolved so rapidly was what made her case so unusual. It was not quite the end of the hour when Theresa had to ask again "Didn't he tell you anything I could do to get him to see me?" Julia could not help thinking of Terry's cynical, intentionally ridiculous comment, and it must have shown on her face. "He did, didn't he?" Theresa actually jumped up out of her chair. "You've got to tell me! He told you you could! Please!" "Theresa, it was something nasty, and he meant it as a joke." "I don't care! Even if it's nasty, I'll do it! I've got to see him! Don't you understand?" "Yes, Theresa, I understand that you have to see him. But he didn't mean he would actually talk to you if you did this. He just said something ridiculous to get me to stop asking him. He made up something that would humiliate you terribly." "Julia, humiliation doesn't mean anything to me any more. I think I offered to let him fuck me before I blanked out the other night. If he wants to do it in front of the whole Voss family, I don't care. Just so he talks to me. I'll walk all the way over there naked if that's what it takes. Please, please, just tell me!" Theresa's statements were rather frightening, and Julia had not a single doubt that the desperate woman meant every word. "Theresa, you don't understand. Even if you do this, I don't think he will talk to you." "If there is even a chance, I'll do it. Please! What did he say?" Julia cursed herself for letting anything show on her face before. If she stonewalled Theresa, she could lose her trust. Hopefully, if she repeated Terry's cynical joke, Theresa would be properly horrified and understand it's mean intent. She heaved a big sigh of resignation and told her. "He said if you shaved your pussy and served them all dinner naked, maybe he would talk to you." If Julia had any doubt about the woman's level of desperation, it was finally erased right then. Rather than being horrified into understanding how hopeless it was to try to reach Terry, Theresa brightened as if given new hope. She gave a quick glance at the clock on Julia's wall, which showed three o'clock, then hastily grabbed her purse and darted from the office. She did not even gasp at the audacity of the demand, and she never even said goodbye. Julia probably could not have answered, anyway. As if Theresa had not already changed dramatically, it seemed that the events of the other night had triggered another quantum leap. It appeared that any concern about self-image, modesty, or propriety had now been completely engulfed by her absolute need to avoid the final condemnation of her failed motherhood: complete loss of contact with one of her children. Ashamed of the levity of the thought, but acknowledging that she needed something to ease the drama of the session, Julia caught herself smiling as she thought of Theresa undressing in the elevator on her way to the car. The humorous relief was all too brief. There was a serious question of whether she should have Theresa apprehended and committed. That highlighted another dilemma. Everything from the sessions with Terry and Theresa was confidential. Yet, she would bet money that Theresa was going to show up at the Vosses', naked and shaved. A family of caring, giving people was about to be affected by the marginally crazy woman. Which was more ethical: keep everything confidential, or warn Betty Voss? From the way Julie talked about her, Julia thought Betty must be a truly unusual person. She seemed to have handled Theresa's disaster the other night remarkably well. But now, Theresa would be begging to be allowed to serve dinner naked, Julia was sure of it. How would Betty feel about her husband and her younger son being exposed to that? Julia picked up the phone. "Well, Dr. Waxman," Betty said after Julia identified herself, "It's a pleasure to talk to you. I'm so glad you were available the other night. That was pretty frightening. How is she?" "That's what I called about. Sometime in the next hour, she will probably be at you door. She will be begging you to let her serve dinner tonight - naked." "Gee, I hope Alan and the boys were planning to be here. I'd hate to have them miss that treat." With that, Betty giggled, and Julia gave an audible sigh of relief. "Seriously, that doesn't bother you?" "Well, a little. Theresa's tough competition. I'll probably have to do my own strip show to keep Alan's thoughts at home." This conversation was turning out to be a very welcome relief for Julia. She was determined to meet Betty Voss. Shrinks need healthy, well-adjusted company once in a while. She also decided to push propriety even more. "I hear from Terry that it won't be a totally new experience for Alan." That brought a belly laugh from Betty. "So you know about my one and only attempt at being an amateur shrink, huh? Say, can I ask? Why should I expect a naked maid tonight?" Julia told her about Terry's joke and how Theresa reacted to it. "I hope I haven't dumped a big problem on you," Julia told her. "Are you concerned about you younger son - Marty, is it?" "Good memory, Doc! Marty's a great kid. He will be hugely embarrassed for Theresa. But he'll look, and I'm glad he'll have the chance. I'll put on my big cloth napkins for tonight. He'll need it for his lap." Betty's hearty laugh sucked Julia right in and she could feel her own tension easing. "I assume you want me to try and talk her out of it," Betty said. "Oh, by all means!" Julia answered, "but I would rate your chances at about zero. You know I'm considering having her picked up and committed." "Don't do that to protect us," Betty insisted. "We can handle it." "I suspect you can. My real reason for holding off is to give her whatever small chance she might have. She is a woman right on the edge. If she can't connect with her son at least a little, I may lose her." "That serious, huh? Well, Doc, we'll do everything we can to help. You, know, it's to our advantage, too." "You mean because of Terry and your daughter?" Julia should not have let that out, but Betty was taking on so much. "Yes," Betty said, then changed the subject. "Sometime when you have a minute, Julia, I'd like to tell you what happened after they took Theresa away. You might find some of it useful in understanding Theresa and Terry. You can also give me your opinion on whether I'm a pervert of a mother." The two chuckled together again, then Betty turned sober. "Julia, I'm trying to help Terry see that he should patch things up with his mother, at least to some extent. Am I right?" "Oh, definitely. I probably don't have to tell you this, but I will. Subtlety and delicacy are essential, here." "Yeah, I assumed that. Julie comes right out and tells him, so I don't need to be obvious." "She does, huh? That's good to hear. She carries an awful lot of anger herself." "Isn't that the truth?" "Well, I have a patient waiting. I have a break in an hour. Can we talk about afterward, then? Hey, I've got a better idea. Could you meet me at Maloney's Diner at seven tomorrow for breakfast? I think you may have an interesting story." "Sure thing. And thanks for the heads up. Should be the most interesting dinner of the year - maybe of any year." With one last shared laugh, they hung up. ------- Betty was thankful for the warning about Theresa, but it still did not fully prepare her for Theresa's arrival. It was a rare summer afternoon when she was home alone, and that helped. "Betty, I know you don't like me, but as a mother - would you help me?" Theresa blurted out as soon as the door was opened. Betty had rarely seen a look of such panic and near despair. It was almost enough to make her forget her antipathy toward the distraught woman. "Theresa, I... how can I help you?" Betty was about to disavow her dislike, but that would have been a lie. She did not think Theresa would have believed her, anyway. She also decided not to let on that she knew what was going to happen. "I have to serve dinner here tonight, naked. Will you let me? Please?" "Why on earth... ?" Betty thought she was doing a pretty good acting job. "Terry told Dr. Waxman that if I shaved my... my p... pussy and served everyone dinner, he might talk to me." "Well, first, come in here where it's cool. Theresa, that doesn't sound like Terry, making a demand like that." "Julia said he... he meant it as a joke - something ridiculous..." "Then why would you do it. He still might not talk to you," Betty cautioned. "If he said it, maybe he means it a little. It doesn't matter. If there's even a little chance, I have to do it. Maybe it will show him how serious I am. Maybe there is a little concern for me still in him. Will you let me?" "Won't it be terribly hard to have Alan and Marty to see you?" Betty asked. "I don't care about any of that. I just need to talk to Terry. Will it, uh, upset you for them to see me?" "Oh, I'll be happy for them to have a treat. You have a beautiful body." "Th... thank you. I... it's hard for me to understand how you can be so casual about it," Theresa stammered. "Well, you're being pretty casual yourself." "Oh, no. Part of me is terrified and embarrassed to death." "So why do you want to do it?" Betty chided herself that she was playing shrink again, but she couldn't resist. "You don't ever have to worry about losing your children - about having them hate you. Betty, I think I'll die if Terry won't at least talk to me once in a while. I know it's too late for them to ever love me, or even like me. But if they totally ignore me... What does humiliation matter compared to that?" There was no question of Theresa's sincerity, or her determination. Betty knew from talking to Julie just how hard the nudity must be for the woman. Yet, she was blowing it off as if it was nothing. Literally, all that mattered was keeping contact with her son. Despite all the terrible history, Betty could not help but admire that kind of motherly instinct. "Well, we'd better plan out how you want to do this before anyone comes home," Betty said. "I, um... well, uh... there's a problem," Theresa stuttered out. "I've never shaved... down there." Then she rushed on. "I've trimmed with a scissors, but..." "Theresa, why don't you just forget that part? I'm sure just your being naked will be enough to..." "NO!! I'm not going to take any chances. Terry has to know that I will do anything he says. Anything!! When I was going crazy the other night, I even told him he could... he could f... f... fuck me. I meant it!" "God!" Was all Betty could get out at first. She decided a quick change of subject was in order. "Because of my swimming, I've trimmed my pubes a lot, and shaved them, too. In fact," and she stopped to abruptly push down her shorts and panties, "I usually keep the lips almost bare and just leave hair above. You know, the crotches on those tank suits are not very wide." Her display had the desired effect, as Theresa's jaw dropped. "I guess you want me to help you, huh?" Betty asked. "If I can make a suggestion, why don't you strip right now. The longer you have to get used to it, the less stressful it will be. We'll have you..." Betty kept up a rambling monologue as she led Theresa to the master bedroom. She was trying to keep her as calm as possible. Betty gave Theresa all the advice she could, but she stopped at actually shaving her. As evidence of her innate modesty, Theresa was very uncomfortable having another woman see her privates so clearly. It amazed Betty even more that she was going through with her crazy plan, and she could easily see why the doctor had considered committing her. When she was bare, Theresa was obviously very uncomfortable. She kept touching her crotch, then looking at Betty and jerking her hand away. Laying a large towel on the bed, Betty said "I'll leave you alone for a while. You need to take the edge off. Will fifteen minutes be enough? Tell you what, when I hear the shower, I'll know you're done." "But I don't... I can't..." "Yes you can. I'm afraid if you don't, you're going to flip out. Do it at least twice, OK?" "Ohhhhh!" Theresa gurgled. "Maybe this will help get you in the mood. I'm going to bring Alan and Marty in here to see you one at a time when they get home. I think it will be easier for you, and I know it will be for them." "Oh, God!" Theresa breathed out, shaking noticeably. "You're just finding out what you got yourself into, aren't you? Well, I'll bet your juices are running now. Please stay on the towel, OK?" It was over twenty minutes, but the shower finally came on. Betty hurried upstairs and offered Theresa powder, perfume, and makeup, which she did not have with her since she came directly from her session. She sat and talked, trying to make things seem as natural as possible. It no longer seemed worthwhile to ask if Theresa really intended to go through with it. Theresa had barely started primping when Betty heard the garage door go up. She knew it was Alan because it was his normal arrival time. "Alan's here. I'm going down to warn him, then we'll be right up." "No, wait! Let me finish..." Theresa started to say. "No, right now. So what if he sees you putting on makeup. My God, he's going to see every inch of you, anyway." "Ohhhhh!" Theresa once again could muster no words. "No way! That's just too much!" Alan protested when he was able speak after the shock of what Betty had just told him. "It's our house and our dinner time. Why should we get involved in their family dispute?" It was Betty's turn to have her jaw drop. For her gentle, congenial lover to react that way brought a stab of great uncertainty over what she had agreed to do for Theresa. For a moment, they just stared at each other, both knowing enough to wait out the rush of emotions before saying anything they would regret. It was Alan who broke the impasse when his shoulders sagged and had said softly "It's hard to believe Terry really said that." "Dr. Waxman insists it was a joke, something so ridiculous that no one would take it seriously. But Theresa did," Betty told him. "So, what if he still won't talk to her?" Alan asked. "She is so desperate, she'll take even the smallest chance," was her answer. "But why do we have to be in the middle of this?" "For Ellie," she answered. "Huh?" "I'm sure you must have noticed: she is hopelessly in love with Terry already. He feels the same way, but he refuses to show it because he doesn't want to hurt her. She doesn't know that, by the way." "So, for Ellie's sake, we have to help Terry do the right thing, huh?" "And it is the right thing," she assured him. "He won't be any kind of lover for her with all that hate still bottled up in him." "Lover? Isn't that rushing things a bit?" he asked, a little shocked at her choice of words. "Remember our first time? How much different is Ellie than I was then?" "Ohhhh! God, where did my little girl go!" "You, Stud, did a great job of helping her to be a woman," Betty said as she kissed him lightly. "Now, you need to go up there and help make it easier for that poor woman." "The things I do for my family!" He complained dramatically. "I have to go up there and have a normal conversation with this Sophia Loren look-alike with a bare pussy and... Arrrrgh!" His teasing ended with a squeeze of his balls that barely qualified as gentle. "And if you dare enjoy it one little bit..." she retorted, then gave him a hug and a serious kiss. She unzipped his pants and snaked her hand inside his shorts. He reached down and gently restrained her hand. "Hey, no fair sending me up there already hard. I'm not the one who's supposed to be embarrassed, remember." "Oh, I wouldn't to that. I was planning to reduce the threat," she said as she rubbed her body against him. "Well, I appreciate the help, but you know how sweaty and grubby I get at work." "You're so considerate. Tell you what. You go up and say hello, then take your shower. I'll come in and defuse you then," Betty told him. "With her in the bedroom!?" he exclaimed. "Are we trying to redefine 'weird'?" "Something like that," she said as she towed him toward the stairs. He had to break free to stop and re-zip his pants. It was hard to tell who was the more nervous when Betty led Alan into the master bath a few minutes later. He tried to act natural, but he stammered on his greeting. She stayed huddled on the vanity stool, covering herself as much as possible. "Theresa, I need you to move out to my little vanity in the bedroom. Alan always showers as soon as he gets home from work. Then, you two need to talk. I want you comfortable in front of at least someone at the table tonight." Betty wondered how she ended up directing this ridiculous production. She answered herself that it was really for Terry, and thus for Ellie. He needed to do what Julie had done and let his mother into his life at least a little bit. Theresa remained huddled on the stool, looking uncertainly between Betty and Alan. "Honey," Betty told her, "at the table, everyone is going to see every inch of you. I'm trying to ease you into it. Just stand up and get it over with." Theresa had a brief flashback to the horrifying session with Julie and Glen, but this time it was of her own doing, and nobody was trying to humiliate her. Focusing only on Terry and her longing to talk to him, she got to her feet and forced her arms to her sides. She was not able to look Alan in the face as she turned and tried not to run out of the bathroom, feeling his eyes on her backside as if they were a heat lamp. Betty playfully took his chin in her hand and turned his redenning face from the retreating woman's bare bottom toward herself. She did not say anything, just grinned and gave him another kiss before reaching in to turn on the shower. Betty went into the bedroom to find Theresa standing frozen like a statue. "Figuring out just what you got yourself into, huh?" she asked. Theresa did not say anything, but the slight straightening of the shoulders and jutting of the jaw was enough answer. "OK, I won't ask any more if you really want to go through with this. I'll be in the bathroom for a few minutes. Alan needs to get off so he won't be as likely to pop a hardon while he talks to you. Hate to have him have to do it himself." She giggled after she said that and almost instantly shed her clothes. "You... mean... you... you... ?" "Oh, come on, Theresa! From talking to Julie, I know you're no prude about sex." "But... but this is so strange... I'm right here, and... and..." "Honey, there ain't nothing about this whole deal that isn't off the scale for strange!" Betty was shaking her head as she walked into the bathroom. Alan had just stepped into the shower and jumped when Betty came in behind him. "But... Theresa... !" "I told her you needed relief before you talked to her," Betty responded. That did nothing to ease his astonishment, but he stopped worrying about that when she generously soaped his genitals. Even after twenty years, just the sight of her naked or near-naked body was enough to bring him to full attention. With touching, on top of the weird but erotic situation, he was rock hard in seconds and decorating the shower wall in a couple of minutes. Betty washed the rest of him while he recovered, then explained what he needed to do to help Theresa succeed with Terry as they stepped out and dried off. "Think we can do this without screaming and hollering too much?" she asked as she leaned on the counter with he ass pointed toward him. "I'm almost as worked up as you are." The absurdity of having a strange woman, one he did not like very much, waiting naked through the open archway between bedroom and bathroom added to the stimulation of his wife's awesome body, and his cock reported for duty immediately, previous come notwithstanding. They made an honest attempt at keeping quiet, but just the squishing and slapping sounds were loud enough for Theresa to hear. Before she got too far out of control, Betty reached over and turned on the faucet to drown out some of the noise. To prove her statement about being worked up, she nearly set a record for a quick climax. Unbeknownst to him, she had started fingering herself as she washed him, and never let up. It was at least fifteen minutes later when Betty walked out of the bathroom theatrically dusting off her hands. Theresa stood slack-jawed in the middle of the room, watching as Betty fetched clean underwear and put on the shorts and top she had shed earlier. As Betty headed for the bedroom door, Theresa squeaked out "Betty, wait! Where are you going?" "Oh, I'm going to wait for Marty. He should be home soon and he needs to know what's going on." "But you can't leave me alone... I..." "Theresa! Alan would never do anything bad. It would be good for the two of you to have a heart-to-heart talk." "But like this I can't... and you just..." Getting a little stern, Betty said "Look, Theresa, you asked for my help. I'm doing everything I can to make this work. Believe me, I want Terry to talk to you as much as you do - well, I guess not as much. But if you're terrified of my men seeing your body at supper, you won't have a chance with Terry. Alan is the sweetest guy in the world. Have a nice chat with him." With that, she walked out. In just a few more minutes, Alan walked out to find Theresa still standing, staring at the door through which Betty had left. Although he had been rather tongue-tied when they first said hello, Betty's talk had settled him down. Never a timid person, he was now ready to take the lead and help the woman. "She's a force, isn't she?" he asked as a way to break the ice. Responding almost dreamily, she answered "I... I was really angry at you guys... thought you were stealing my children from me." "We could tell that when you visited that one time. Still feel that way?" She looked at him for the first time, and there were tears starting down her cheeks. She shook her head and said "Oh, no, I... she's been so helpful, I..." At that point, her eyes widened into a shocked expression. "Did you really just?... Were you really... ?" "Yes, that's what you heard. Hope we didn't embarrass you too much," he said, certain that they had done just that. "But... but... how could... why... ?" "Theresa," he said, openly sweeping his eyes over her for the first time, "you have a very sex body. Betty was afraid I would get aroused talking to you and wanted to prevent that. Why don't we sit down and talk a bit?" There were two comfortable chairs in a corner of the room, and he pulled one out so they faced each other. As she was about to sit down, she said, "Oh, could you get a towel for me to sit on?" He started to move toward the bathroom, then stopped himself. "The linens are in the cupboard just inside the door," he told her. She looked at him with a little surprise, then some fear, obviously not wanting to walk away in front of him. "Theresa, how are you going to serve dinner if you can't even fetch a towel while I watch you?" he asked. She shuddered briefly, probably realizing again what she was in for, then rather shakily walked to the bathroom, got the towel, and sat on it. "Theresa, I have to confess," he told her when she was seated, "this is not the first time I've seen you naked." At her surprised expression, he explained what had happened during her breakdown, and how Betty had done it as a test. "How... how did they react?" she asked. "I probably shouldn't tell you that," he answered. "Please! What did Terry say? I need to know!" Deciding it was worth breaking a confidence, Alan told her about Terry's reaction, sending her into tears. He misread the reason for her crying, and apologized for invading her privacy. Through her sobs, she shook her head and told him "That's not it. He's... he's such a loving, considerate boy, and I... I... drove him away." That was all she could say for quite a while because of the crying. "Alan, do you believe I've changed?" she asked plaintively when she had regained some control. That triggered a long conversation, with Theresa asking many, many questions. She tried to find out as much as she could about Terry, but asked about the Voss children, as well. A half hour later, the talk wound down a little, and Alan decided to push things a little. "Theresa, why don't you stand up and turn around slowly so I can get a really good look at your body?" Her jaw dropped and she looked at him in surprise and a little fear. The conversation had been so warm and congenial, and now he asked her to do that! But he still wore a gentle smile, an expression of encouragement. It struck her that he was truly trying to help. She would have to walk around in front of all of them, later. Again feeling weak in the knees, she got to her feet and moved a few steps away from him. As she struggled to keep her arms away from her body, she again remembered the awful session in front of Glen. As she faced him, she could feel a tingling in her crotch, and it seemed as if there was a spotlight on her bare labia. She did a very slow turn, and when she again faced him, she was able to muster a quizzical expression. "I have to believe you've changed if you're willing to do this," Alan told her as he rose to leave the room. "I hope it works with Terry. I really do." ------- "No way! That's crazy! I couldn't handle it!" was Marty's reaction when Betty told him he was to go up and talk to the naked Theresa. He and Terry had just returned from a job they were doing, and Betty had brought him up to his room while Terry went down to the basement. It didn't settle him down at all when his mother told him "Just go and jerk off a couple of times. That'll keep you from popping one in front of her." "Mo-om!" Even with their recently-enhanced intimacy, that was shocking to the boy. "Listen, Honey," she said gently, "this woman needs help, and we can give it. Terry needs to talk to her - I think you know that. And we'll really be helping Ellie. Just think how hard it will be at the table if she's worried about you seeing her bare pussy and her tits for the first time." She deliberately used those terms to jolt him a little. "But..." "Don't tell me a teenaged boy is going to turn down a chance to sit and ogle a beautiful, naked woman!" "But... but what would I say? What could we talk about?" "She's starving for anything about Terry. Talk about your projects. That would be a good start." "I really don't like her, though. I mean after what they did to Terry," he complained. "I know, but we all have to get past that. She is trying her hardest to change, and we need to give her a chance." "But why naked? and... and bare?" Betty explained Julie's earlier demand and Terry's joke, and a little of what being naked seemed to symbolize to Theresa. It was a little hard because she was not at all sure she understood it herself. "Do you need to take the pressure off?" she asked. "I... I want to shower. I'll... I'll... go see her in about twenty minutes," he answered. Later, Marty knocked on the master bedroom door, and instead of just telling him to come in, Theresa came and opened it. Once again, it was hard to tell who was more embarrassed. Finding some mysterious source of composure, Theresa faced him and spread her arms. "Marty, you are such a considerate boy - no, a considerate man. It's OK to look at the rest of me, not just my face." "I... I don't understand how you can... why?" stammering was happening a lot in the bedroom. Theresa explained as best she could. "Marty, I hear you and Terry have become good friends. I couldn't be happier. Thank you for making this easier for me." Marty remembered his mother's suggestion, and started talking about the projects the two boys were doing together. As he talked, his enthusiasm for the work started to take over and the stammering lessened. He got into much more detail than she understood or cared about, but since it had to do with her son, she listened attentively. When he stopped talking for a moment, she said "Marty, I'm sure you have good reason to dislike me." When he started to protest, she stopped him. "Just let me finish. I have changed, and I have to do my best to make Terry believe that - to make all of you believe that. This," and she made a gesture at her naked body, "started from what Terry thought of as a joke. But Terry will tell you it is very, very different from the way I was before. If this is what it takes to make people believe I have changed, well... it's worth it to me. I hope you never have to feel the kind of pain that is making me do this." ------- Seeing that the one-on-one sessions with Theresa seemed to be having quite an effect, Betty delayed dinner to give Ellie and Glen a chance to talk to her. She went down and told Terry about the delay, and was relieved when he said he would be reading until she was ready. He did offer to help her with the meal, but she declined. Ellie was even more reluctant than Marty had been. She was acutely aware of Terry's pain and blamed Theresa for it. It took Betty longer than it had with Marty to get Ellie's reluctant agreement. Theresa could read Ellie's face clearly when she came into the room, and it almost made her break up. She was able to pull herself together enough to say "You're in love with Terry, aren't you? And I've messed up his life! You must hate me, and I don't blame you. I hate myself for what I've done to him." Ellie had not known what to expect, but this was not it. Before she could react, Theresa went on. "I hope Terry falls in love with you. I'll bet you're just like your mother. You could make up for all the real love I didn't give him." That was as far as she could get before breaking down. Ellie really could not think of much to say, and could not bring herself to try to comfort the woman, whom she still considered a monster. When Theresa could talk again, she gave the same explanation about her nakedness that she had given Marty. She thanked Ellie, and Ellie left. ------- When Glen came into the room, he spoke first. "Mrs. Menconi, I..." "In-laws should use first names, Glen," she told him gently. "Oh, I... that day: I didn't know Julie was going to be so... so cruel. I'm sorry." "She surprised all of us," Theresa answered. "At the time, I was almost destroyed, but I have learned a lot since. I can now say that I deserved it, and a lot more. That's... that's a big part of the reason for this," indicating her nakedness. "I hope Terry agrees to talk to you," he told her sincerely. "And I want to thank you for helping convince Julie to see me. I would have understood if you had told her never to talk to me." "I must admit I did it for selfish reasons," Glen said. "That kind of break-up would not have been good for her." "It might have killed me," she said softly. "If... if Terry won't see me..." she left the sentence unfinished. ------- Theresa had harbored a lot of resentment against Betty for 'stealing' her children, but it was very hard to hold any of those feelings after that afternoon. As she sat in the master bedroom waiting for the signal to come down and start serving, Theresa was almost in tears over the kindness Betty had shown her. Thoughts of Betty's kindness were not enough to quell the nerves, however. Strangely, though, she was not that worried about showing her naked body and her bare pussy. Everyone had already seen her. She was more concerned with how he would react. Would he angrily reject her completely? Would he agree to keep contact with her? What else would she have to do? When Betty's signal came, Theresa was almost unable to move. She had to walk through the dining room to get to the kitchen, so her presence and her nudity would be revealed before she could bring out any food. Betty had worked out the proper handling of that issue, as well. Just as Theresa stepped through the archway from the living room, Betty said "Theresa has graciously offered to serve our dinner tonight." Everyone else knew the drill and reacted in agreed-upon fashion. "What the Hell?" Terry exploded, bolting upright in his chair. Theresa said nothing, but went into the kitchen to fetch two serving plates. When she came back and placed them on the table, she looked at him, still standing, and told him "You said if I shaved my p... pussy and served dinner, you would talk to me." "That was a joke!" Terry almost hollered, anger fighting disbelief on his face. "I just made that up - it was a ridiculous idea!" "It wasn't ridiculous to me," Theresa answered. "I need to talk to you." "Well, I said 'maybe' I would talk to you," Terry was running out of anger at that point, disbelief taking over. "Maybe is better than nothing," Theresa said, her previous surprising composure starting to fail her. "E... eat your dinner. That's what I'm here for," she said as an escape from the tension. Terry sat down, and everyone else started eating, minus the usual lively dinner conversation. Terry just sat and stared at his mother. Finally, he took some tentative bites. Theresa made sure everyone was served, then sat at a prepared place and took some food on her plate. She did not pretend to eat, though. That was impossible in her strung-out condition. At the slightest hint of anyone needing something, she was up like a shot, scurrying to take care of them. As the meal wound down, Theresa took a deep breath and asked "Will you talk to me, Terry." "She had no right to tell you that!" was his only reply. "You gave her permission, didn't you," Theresa answered, much more in a pleading tone than an argumentative one. "Shit!" he spat out. "That was not a promise. I would never ask you to do that! Shit!" "Don't you understand, Terry? I'll do anything - anything at all!" "But I wasn't serious. I don't want to..." He broke off in mid-word as he saw Betty stand up and shed her shirt and her bra before she was hardly upright. "The point is, Terry, that your mother is deadly serious," Betty said as she shucked off her shorts and panties in one quick motion. "And so am I." Terry, as well as everyone else at the table, was frozen for a moment as they took in her awesome naked form. Then, he spoke to Betty, "So, are you taking her side, now?" "Terry, I think you know me better than that. I'm on your side. Your anger and your total rejection of her will eat you up over the years, just as it will her." "But I have a right to be angry!" "You certainly do! And nobody knows that better than your mother," Betty said, keeping her tone as gentle as she could. "She doesn't want to be that person who hurt you any more. She is trying everything she can not to be. Nobody can redo the past, but if we don't get over the bad parts, they can take us over." "This is crazy!" Terry said, shaking his head. "I want to forget, but when I'm around her I can't." He had barely finished those words, when Julie jumped up and stood beside Betty, starting to unbutton the blouse she wore. "Believe me, Terry, I know just how you feel. But you won't forget by ignoring it." She got the blouse off and was lowering her shorts when suddenly Ellie was on the other side of her mother, her halter top already in her hand, exposing her sports bra. "No! Stop it! Ellie, don't! Please! Julie, stop!" Terry sagged back onto his chair and Theresa began sobbing openly. The other three women stood motionless. After a seemingly interminable pause, Terry let out his breath, looked at his mother and said "I'll talk." There was no cheering and there were no high fives. Theresa did not stop crying. Betty, Julie, and Ellie put their clothes back on. "You got what you wanted," Terry said to his mother. "Aren't you going to dress?" Her reply shocked them all and told volumes about her mental state. "I don't feel worthy to wear clothes around you, yet." There was no tearful, affectionate reconciliation, just as there had not been for Julie. Theresa may have wanted that with all her heart, but just as with Julie, she knew it was not possible and probably never would be. They were going to talk, and that made everything worthwhile. She was so thrilled she nearly forgot her nakedness. In one of those thoughtful acts that generally characterized him, after dinner Terry said "It's kind of chilly downstairs and you don't have anything to hide from anyone any more. Let's talk in the family room." Theresa smiled through her reddened eyes, then almost ran to the linen closet to get a towel to sit on. She was sitting expectantly on a side chair when Terry came into the room. The others politely found somewhere else to be. "Thank you, Terry," she said as he sat down. "You never sat and just talked to me before," he said, as if working to avoid any hint of sentimentality. "Why now?" "I... I've spent months finding out what a horrible person I have been. I lie awake at night wishing there was some way to make it right. I know there isn't. But I don't want to be that person any more. I think I am different, and I need you to believe I am." "But you can't expect that we're going to be lovey-dovey pals! Not after everything that happened," he objected. "No, I don't expect that. I can wish for it with all my heart, but Dr. Waxman has helped me accept that it will never happen." "Then aren't you just making it harder for yourself. Wouldn't you be better off just forgetting about me?" "That's what your father is doing. But I'm a mother. I was a terrible mother, but still a mother. There's a feeling that men probably can't understand. We need at least some kind of contact with our children. We can't survive without it." "I honestly don't feel like you're my mother. You're more like a stranger I met." That made Theresa gasp, but she held it together. "And if a stranger you just met needed to see you regularly to keep her sanity, you would do it. That's the kind of person you are." He just grunted at the statement. "That's all I'm asking, Terry. Treat me as well as you would a needy stranger. That's what Julie is doing. I know that's all I can hope for, but I'll take it. Can you do that?" "I can't promise every week like Julie does, but OK, I'll try." At that, Theresa could not hold back sobs of relief. He just waited her out. As he sat, he was trying not to admit to himself that he felt better after agreeing. "I wouldn't let a stranger sit here naked," Terry said after a short silence. "Go get dressed. I'll still talk." Theresa looked disoriented for a moment, looking at him as if waiting for him to tell her he was joking. When his face remained passive, she started crying hard, but managed to get up and go to get dressed. When she returned, dressed, she was crying even harder. When she was able to get some control of herself, she asked him. "Will you tell me the truth about the center." "Why do you want to know that?" "That seems to be the last straw that made you hate us so much. I need to know just what we did to you." Reluctantly at first, then with a sort of vehemence, he told it all. He may have dramatized some of the worst parts, but she had asked for it. He talked for almost half an hour as she sat motionless and silent, the tears ebbing and flowing. "Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God!" she repeated over and over when he finished. Then, "We didn't know it was that bad!" "Yes, you did!" he said it with undisguised hurt and anger. "The caseworker told you over and over that you had to do something to keep me from going there. She told you it was a Hell-hole." "But we didn't think..." Theresa started to say, but closed her mouth with an audible snap. "No! I'm not going to make excuses for what we did! It was heartless, stupid, and arrogant. Saying I'm sorry is so pathetically inadequate, I..." she got that far and broke down again. "At risk of sounding motherly," she said, her voice still broken from crying, "I hope you don't have to learn the way I did that some bad things we do can never be fixed." There was a prolonged silence as she gradually recovered from her crying and he just watched her. He was once again surprised at what a beautiful, womanly body she had. He was also disturbed, because it made it even harder to maintain the hateful image of the brawling, domineering shrew that his mother always was in his mind. "Um, when we talk again, what are we going to talk about," he asked, breaking the silence. "Are we going to rehash all the bad stuff every time?" "If you need to, we will. I want to just find out about your life - all the stuff I didn't bother to find out before. We can talk about whatever you want. I just need to talk to you." Terry stood up out of his deeply-ingrained politeness when his mother rose to leave, then stood by the door as she left for home. He responded to her goodbye, but that was all. ------- Chapter 11 Betty had shown Theresa out after her unbelievable visit, and took Terry's hand as soon as the front door closed. She led him back to the family room, sat on the sofa, and pulled him down next to her. Still holding his hand, she said "That was awfully hard, wasn't it? It was the right thing to do, Terry." He could not look her in the eye, and she could sense the strength of the emotions he was struggling to subdue. On instinct, she pulled him to herself, cradling his head between her breasts. She was not at all surprised when the sobs started. For many minutes, they sat like that, with him unable to regain control. Betty saw Ellie watching from the doorway, her own tears mirroring those of the guy she loved so deeply. Betty smiled at her daughter, and did not try to motion her to leave. When he finally got some composure back, he said "Betty, I... ," but that's all he got out as she put her hand firmly over his mouth. "You don't need to say anything, Terry. I am proud that you felt you could let go with me. I think you needed it very badly. I need to tell you something," and she flicked her eyes ever so briefly toward Ellie, who was still watching, unseen by Terry, "it should have been Ellie here instead of me. She wants that so badly she can hardly stand it." They had discussed this subject a few times, so he did not try to rehash his reasons for keeping Ellie just a friend. He knew she thought they were nonsense, anyway. He just squeezed her hand, and they both got up to resume normal evening activities. ------- Theresa could have run all the way home after her incredible evening, maybe even flown. The minimal agreement for contact from Terry was that important to her. For once, she was glad that Vince was out of town. She had not really explained to him about her contact with the children, and was not sure how to approach it. Tonight, it was better to just enjoy her reprieve from total failure as a mother. Coming out of the shower later, she stood and stared at her bare pubis, still not quite believing what she had done. How could she, passionate but modest, have bared herself like that before relative strangers? Even now, after it was all over, though, she could not feel any shock or shame, only relief. Her body, which she had always been proud of, but had kept as a hidden treasure for all but Vince, no longer seemed sacred to her. Somehow, her body was now a tool to try to win back a little of all that she had lost. Her deep-seated need for some thread of connection with her children would drive her to use anything she had. Why her being naked in front of them made any difference, she could not quite understand, but it had gotten her what she had to have to survive. Still staring at her crotch, she had to admit that her nakedness communicated something she could hardly put in words. She knew that she was a different Theresa from the one who stood idly by as Vince condemned their son to that awful place. She was not the same vengeful mother who ignored her daughter's desperate pleas to attend college with her lover, just to punish the girl. People had to believe she was different, and when she was naked, they seemed to. Alan Voss had every reason to hate her. He lived with the wounds she had inflicted on her children. Yet, he had talked to her with sympathy and understanding. Would he have done that if she wore her usual designer-label clothes? Was her nudity necessary to get him to believe her? Betty was ascending to the level of a deity in Theresa's mind. She no longer carried a shred of jealousy or anger because Betty now had her children. She was in awe of the love and the communication that flowed so naturally between all of them in that house. And when Betty stood at the dinner table and stripped in her support! Theresa knew without a doubt that she would still not be sure of contact with her son if Betty had not done that. By everything she had been taught and had believed, nakedness was wrong except in a marital situation. But it had won her what little she had left as a mother. She would display her body without hesitation if that was what it took. Her modesty and her dignity mattered nothing. What mattered was her embattled motherhood. She had been through such a gauntlet of emotions throughout the day that she should have been exhausted. Instead, she felt wired, sleep being the farthest thing from her mind. At the same time, she felt lonely. There was no one that she could just open up to and tell all of the things that were troubling her. Her siblings and parents knew nothing of the disaster that had befallen her family. They would have to let both sides know about Julie's marriage soon, but both she and Vince had been putting off the day for as long as possible. With her circle of friends, she would be afraid to shatter the image of herself and her family that she had built up over the years. Of course, they had found out about Terry and the drugs, and that had been hard to overcome. After news of Julie, she might have to look for new friends. Her eyes fell on the dispenser of birth control pills that always sat in plain sight by her sink. There were just two left for the month. That was one reason she was in such a hurry to serve the naked dinner. Of course, the dominant reason was her need to establish something permanent with her son. The pills were a daily reminder of Julie's situation, as Theresa was as certain as she could be that Julie had gotten pregnant on purpose. Any thought of Julie always brought a wave of guilt, shame, and despair over her. Her once-perfect daughter was now an indictment to her own arrogance and compulsion to control, a monument to her abject failure as a mother. Theresa looked at the pills, thought of Julie throwing hers away, and had an epiphany. She could try again and get it right this time! She could still have children! She could have all the wonderful mother-child times she had thrown away with Julie and Terry. She could have the kind of family the Vosses had! The insight was so stunning she had to grab ahold of the counter to keep from collapsing. Why had she never thought of it before? Like a drowning person latching onto a lifesaver, Theresa grabbed the idea of another round of motherhood. In the space of a few fractions of a second, she was determined that she would do it. Even more than before, she was too emotional to think of sleep. Two glasses of wine made very little difference, nor did the two shots of whiskey that followed. They may have made her steps a little unsteady, but her mind was still going like crazy. The rest of that sleepless night, she spent debating with herself on all of the reasons she should reject the crazy idea. The first thing that came to mind was Vince. He would never go for it. It took quite a while before she could acknowledge the thought lurking at the edge of her mind that she did not care what Vince thought. Then, she shuddered at the realization that she could not do it right this time with Vince the way he was. And Vince had shown absolutely no inclination to change. From there, it was a short step to admitting that she might have to divorce Vince. If there was a divorce, there would be some kind of settlement. With that and her trust, she and her new family would be fine, financially. That threw her into a whole round of thoughts about Vince and how she felt about him. He had been her life for all those years. She had been absolutely faithful, as she assumed he had been. She had always thought that she loved him deeply, but as she had changed over recent months, so had her view of her husband. The problem with her relationship with Vince was that they no longer shared the same motivations. In her mind, controlling another person had become frightening and sinful, rather than her natural right. Vince still held the old view. She was overwhelmed by guilt and remorse, painfully aware of everything she had done wrong to drive her children away. Vince saw the children as the offenders and himself as the blameless victim. Vince wanted to do battle in the old way, but she saw the fighting as a big reason the kids were gone. She just could not do it any more. Vince wanted sex after the boisterous foreplay of verbal battle. He wanted it to be a contest. Since the naked meeting with Julie and Glen, that kind of sex seemed like abuse, not loving. Could she give up what she had with Vince: the income and the possessions, the social standing? It took not an instant for her to declare to herself that those things were all worthless since the departure of her children. Yes, she could give them up. The Vosses were so happy with a fraction of the wealth she had always enjoyed. Striving to keep her emotions in check and think rationally, she was able to declare to herself that it boiled down to a choice of being a wife vs. being a mother. She still had the self-confidence to believe that she could do what was necessary to repair their marriage. She could give him some of the kind of sex he wanted while she 'trained' him to like the more romantic, loving kind she now preferred. But if she got her marriage back in shape, her children would still be nearly strangers. She would not have accomplished the most important thing. Failure as a mother negated success as a wife. The only way to erase her failure as a mother was to do it again, and do it right. That could not happen with Vince as he was now. Therefore, there really was no choice. Motherhood trumped everything else: modesty, wealth, marriage - everything. Then, she ran into a stopper. To have children, she needed a man to impregnate her. She could wait for a divorce until she was sure she was pregnant. That would only ensure her of one child, but she wanted more. That was the point where she was literally knocked off of her feet by the realization that she was thinking of divorce as not just a possibility, but as a near certainty. Many more questions rampaged through her slightly alcohol-impaired mind. Was she too old to bear a normal, healthy child? How would she feel being as old as the grandmothers of most of her child's schoolmates? Then, it hit her that she would have a child younger than Julie's child, her own grandchild. Could she raise a child or children alone at her age if she had to? Could she give up the 'golden years' of relaxation and enjoyment to raise teenagers again? For many hours that night, Theresa went through the questions, over and over. From the first idea, though, there was no question she would do it. What she had learned about herself was that she was a mother above all else. She had come too late to that realization, and had spent no time making sure she was a good mother. She had failed, and she could not see her life ending that way. Here was a chance to prove that she really could handle her only meaningful mission properly. It was a chance for at least partial redemption, and she would take it. All of the negative arguments lost. She was as healthy as anyone else she knew in their early forties. She would make sure she did everything right during pregnancy, and she would get the best of care. She knew she had aged well, and she would do everything she could not to look old for her kids. Beyond that, she didn't care what anyone else thought. A child should have a father, but not one like Vince had been. Certainly, she could raise more kids alone. The important thing was to get pregnant. She would worry about the father later. What good were the golden years if they were filled with remorse over her mistakes and what she had lost. It would be far better to exhaust herself proving that she could do it right. And it would not even be exhausting for her. Because of her own mistakes and the example of Betty, who Theresa considered the perfect mother, she would welcome every task and every crisis joyfully. At that point, she had decided. Now, it was just a matter of implementation. Vince must not know what she intended. She would keep the pill dispenser and keep buying the prescription. She wondered if Julie had done it by throwing away one pill at a time. The one big challenge was her current relationship with Vince. Sex had about dried up, and she was responsible. She had to get it started again, and that would take some finesse. Maybe Julia could help her with a plan. Successfully raising a child with the same genetics as Julie and Terry would really prove that she could do it, so at least the first one had to be Vince's. ------- As Theresa was making her decision to raise more children and thinking about how to get Vince to impregnate her, he was in the process of making her job much more difficult. Vince's home life had changed so drastically that it no longer felt like home. As he and Theresa approached their twentieth anniversary, coming up in early August, he looked at it as more of a funeral for the life they had enjoyed until recently. By Independence Day, it had sunk in that that life was gone forever. Vince was no immigrant: his family had been in the US for four or five generations. Still, he was the first to break away from the tight ethnic enclave where his immigrant ancestors had settled after getting off of the boat. Machismo was a prominent characteristic of the culture he was raised in, and he certainly did not leave it behind when he left the neighborhood for college, never to return. Not everything about machismo was bad, either. An important part of the cultural ethic was family: loyalty to and from the family, protection of the family, support from the family; 'the family, right or wrong'. His parents' generation openly recognized the need for education and the desirability of seeking professional employment, rather than just the laboring or civil service jobs that had been the community's mainstay. That stepping up in the world meant moving away from their little piece of the old world was a painful reality that had taken generations to acknowledge. Though he was leaving the community, Vince was expected to carry the values with him, and by and large, he did. Going to a Catholic college and marrying a girl with the same ancestry scored him major points and kept him tightly linked to 'back home', even earning him celebrity status as one who left to make it big but did not forget his roots. To his credit, Vince had always been careful to be cordial and respectful to his siblings and various levels of cousins, most of whom had lunchpail jobs. The old world pattern for a marriage was that strangely effective mix of official strict patriarchy with a working matriarchy behind the scenes. In some respects, the Menconis' marriage followed the pattern. Though college educated, Theresa never sought outside employment, but started quickly on their family. But she was by no means the typical wife from the old community. Perhaps the existence of her trust fund emboldened her, or perhaps it was just the raw strength of her personality, but from their very first date, Theresa never acquiesced meekly to Vince on anything. Thus, outwardly, they were a traditional match that both families could be happy with. Privately, she was a whole new kind of woman that he had never before encountered, a kind that aroused some deep-seated sexual kink in him. They had bonded instantly and strongly. The Menconis' ancestral culture had over centuries learned to deal with the Church and its sexual teachings. Those teachings were, of course, so unrealistic that it is doubtful even the hierarchy could believe them. Nevertheless, sex as an unfortunate duty for women, rewarded by the gift of motherhood, was taught as truth. Never was there a hint of concession that sex should be a pleasurable experience to be sought by women. For the man, sex was a base drive, unavoidable, but to be bridled for his eternal good. Sex for purposes other than procreation, specifically for recreation, was loudly decried. Thus, an aura of guilt always surrounded a person who happened to be enjoying sexual activity. As is usually the case when reality does not match the facade, some interesting accommodations were made. Greater devotion to the Church's teachings seeming to be a common by-product of maturity for the women, sex tended to be less available and less pleasurable for the husbands as they aged. This was a sure-fire formula for dalliance, and taking a mistress became quite commonplace, particularly for a man of means. Adultery was, of course, both against the Church's teachings, and contrary to the men's own universally-espoused devotion to family. The solution was neither condemnation nor acceptance, but rather purposeful blindness. Everyone knew it was happening, but nobody acknowledged it. If the community's traditional views of sex were eroding naturally, throwing two young people into a college environment had a good chance to sweep them away. Given all of that, Vince and Theresa chose the old-world fidelity model, and had never regretted it. Of course, their sexual life was light years from the church's teachings, but outwardly, they were a faithful couple. Nor was that a disguise. Vince had heard all the whispers as he grew up and he knew just who among his extended family was keeping a mistress. Personally, he saw no appeal to an outside sexual interest. He had all he could handle at home, after all, so it was easy to toe the line. Of late, it was not so easy. He just could not believe what had happened to his wife - his soulmate, as he always thought of her. It started after the fateful incident in the kitchen. First, she no longer wanted sex after a fight. Then, after the disastrous naked meeting, she would no longer even fight. Intense, energetic, acrobatic, even competitive sex was a key building block of their marriage, and it was gone. The too infrequent sex of late had come about as a result of sheer accumulated need, or through romantic buildup. He and Theresa now had some serious, deep-seated disagreements over the children. In that environment it was hard for him to be romantic, knowing what she thought of his stance. Thus, over the summer, sex between them had happened only when they could no longer stand the lack of it. Since Theresa's preoccupation with the children absorbed her so totally, she could go a long time without. Vince's pride would not let him think of seeking a mistress, but there was no question he was vulnerable to a predatory woman. ------- Lee Waters saw herself as the one who would destroy the glass ceiling forever, and she had the tools to do it. A razor sharp mind, a solid grounding of common sense, unbounded self-confidence, an Ivy League B-school MBA, and the looks of a runway model; it was a combination destined to take her far, and it had already. At thirty-eight, she was VP of Product Management at the same company where Vince was a Divisional Director of Sales, one step below VP level. Lee was thankful that her given name was LeeAnne, and not Mary, Jane, or Susan. The ability to use the androgynous nickname Lee was important to her. That by no means implied that her sexual leanings were anything but strongly hetero. She had indulged in occasional sapphic pleasures in times of severe need, but to her, it was only temporary relief until she could get the real thing. Along with her other qualities, Lee had a voracious sexual appetite. Within the past year and a half, she had been divorced by her husband of ten years. He just did not measure up in some areas. He was successful in his own right, but he was just too nice for her. He also had a healthy sexual appetite, but in comparison to her, he almost seemed celibate. That imbalance between them led her to seek outside fulfillment, something he could not live with. He had the goods on her, but chose to separate without seeking any of her assets, which exceeded his, in compensation for her proven infidelity. Also in his late thirties, he was scrambling to keep his life together, having had his heart ripped out. He still loved her, and lamented his lost chance to father a family. Children were an unacceptable impediment to Lee's career aspirations. The divorce was not something Lee had wanted at all. All the sex he could give her was at least a good start toward satisfying her needs. And even an aggressive businesswoman was not averse to the sincere adulation and pampering of a true gentleman, which Roland, her ex, definitely was. In a move she considered unnecessarily spiteful, he refused to engage in sex with her after the divorce. Thus, Lee was left with a serious problem - getting enough. She knew that indiscretion could sabotage the career she had so painstakingly built, so bar-hopping was out of the question. On top of all the other roadblocks, tender love-making did not do it for her. In truth, a moderate level of bondage is what she sought, but at a minimum she needed it very energetic. Because of their complementary positions, Vince and Lee were often on teams that visited important customers or prospects. Their personalities made them frequent sparring partners, each fighting vigorously for the upper hand. Despite the skirmishes, each respected and liked the other, probably for the way they saw much of themselves reflected. In Lee's opinion, Vince was hands-down the most desirable stud among those she worked with, and only the legitimate beauty and sexpot at home kept Vince from drooling over his compatriot. She never made a move because dalliance with coworkers could be career suicide. He made no move because he was faithful. Even more important, he loved Theresa. Vince's concept of love could rightly be called into question, but as he understood it, he loved her with all his heart. Two attractive, sex-starved people with huge libidos and similar sexual preferences, thrown together in seductive situations can only restrain themselves so long. For both Lee and Vince, the limit was reached on the trip during which Theresa made her desperate, naked play for contact with her son. The divorce had kept Lee constantly hungry for more sex, and Theresa's dramatic change and the tension between them had left Vince wishing there was an over-the-counter remedy for blue balls. As Theresa mulled over the inspiration of having another child, Lee, Vince, and two people from their engineering department were returning to the luxurious B&B that they always used when visiting that customer. At dinner, they had received the go-ahead for an important innovation to the product line that they had been working on for over eight months. It was custom work for that major customer, but would be incorporated into their catalog, and Vince anticipated eager acceptance in their target industry. It was one of those watershed deals that every career hangs on, and a true cause for celebration. Vince, however, was experiencing more frustration than elation. Looking over at Lee across the back seat of the cab, he could not read the expected triumph in her face, either. Part of what bothered Vince was the lack of anyone to share the joy with. Since things headed South at home, Theresa no longer related to news from work as she once had. All she could think about was the kids, Vince was convinced. At the same time, Lee was sneaking glances at Vince and noticing the lost look on his face. Not at all what she expected under the circumstances, but it matched her own feelings. She, however, was able to identify her problem easily: she was so horny she was almost spitting static from her fingertips. Over the five or six years that they had worked together, Vince had always been high on Lee's 'wish I could fuck' list. He was good looking, had a nice body, and exuded that alpha male sexuality that got right to her core. However, he also had the look of a man satisfied with his woman. She knew Theresa from numerous social encounters, and she could see why Vince was not looking. She actual liked Theresa, and even her strong sex drive would not let her mess up the life of a good colleague and friend. Her divorce had a weakening effect on Lee's scruples, and she had been thinking about Vince more and more. He was not a husband-type target, just a potential sex partner. Over the last eight or nine months, she had noticed a definite change in him. Her keen insights told her that his sex at home had gone sour. If that was true, she rationalized, it would be a favor for both of them to get together and relieve the pressure. Knowing enough about him to be sure that he would never initiate anything, Lee knew she would have to make it happen. Tonight had to be the night or she might not make it until morning with her sanity intact. At the B&B, the other two team members declared their intention to retire for the night. Lee contrived to have Vince hang back a little and told him "Meet me in the hot tub in fifteen minutes." She turned and went to her room before he had a chance to object. This would not be their first time sharing a late hot tub, so Vince did not even think of objecting. In fact, he hoped that a good soak would ease his growing tension. Naturally, he got there first, even after getting drinks for them from the in-room liquor supply. It was a very warm late-summer night, and he just sat on the edge of the tub with his feet in the water, enjoying the warmth and the stillness. The underwater tub lights were on, along with a few safety lights along the walkway from the gate in the privacy fence surrounding the tub. Lee came through the gate wrapped in one of the jumbo towels from her room. Vince always marveled at how beautiful she looked, no matter what the setting or what she was wearing. With a twinge of conscience, he realized that he had always thought the same thing about Theresa, as well. The two women were quite different, though. First of all, Lee had creamy, pale skin and light brown hair as against Theresa's deep brunette tresses and olive skin tone. Theresa's body was more lush, with more pronounced curves. Lee had very nice curves, as well, but smaller breasts and less pronounced hips. While Theresa's ass was full and lush, Lee's was taut and thrust out enticingly. Theresa's cleavage was the stuff of masterpieces, but Lee's legs could have appeared in any hosiery ad or starred in any chorus line. Both women moved with a very sexy grace, but Lee exuded a sense of strength and power with each step, as well. Theresa's overall presence oozed passion and desirability in Vince's mind, while he saw strength and competence when he looked at Lee. Theresa's sexuality was elemental, timeless, classic, the earth mother. Lee's was hypnotic, almost feral, the spider. Vince tried to stop himself from comparing the two women. It wasn't as if Lee was a possible sex partner, after all. But he could not help noticing that her somewhat smaller breasts had almost no sag, and dark nipples that stuck out surprisingly far. Another significant difference was Lee's total lack of pubic hair that... !!! It took that long for Lee's nakedness to penetrate Vince's reverie and generate the expected surprise. In a move that probably seemed like experienced worldliness but was actually nearly-paralyzing shock, Vince said and did nothing upon the realization. His expression did not reflect his feelings, but remained as calm as when he was doing his mental comparison. Lee read Vince's false composure as a go signal and stepped gracefully down into the tub, then very slowly right up to him. She reached out and took hold of the sides of his swimsuit, then said her first words. "Vince, I need this so badly I can't stand it. I have a feeling you do, too, but this is not the time to talk about reasons. If you tell me to stop, I will, but you have to say it right now. Otherwise, I am going to fuck you silly." With her last words, she said "Up!" as she pulled down his trunks, and he obeyed. She had to use one hand to push his cock in to get the waistband past it. In the few steps it had taken her to reach him, he had hardened completely. He started to slide down into the tub, assuming that would be more comfortable, but she stopped him. "Despite the stories and the movies, fucking underwater doesn't work worth shit," she explained. There was no time for objection as she turned her back toward him, feet on the seat in the tub, and lowered her glorious ass right down onto his lap. Reaching between her legs, she unerringly pulled him right to her opening. Not bothering to spread her lips, she lowered herself and he popped in. In the space of less than a minute, Vince had gone from harmless reverie to all-out adultery, breaking his tightly-held personal code without a single objection. He experienced a stab of guilt piercing through the shock that still almost paralyzed him, but he also experienced the wonderful sensation of a strange pussy seeming to wolf down his deprived, aching cock. Coupled with the world-class ass and smoothly tapered back filling his vision, conscience and guilt had little chance. Lee managed about a dozen up and down motions before Vince let loose with an upward lurch and a long moan, finalizing his transgression. As a testament to the intensity of his pent-up sexual drive, there was no post-ejaculation torpor. Rather, he was jolted from his barely conscious state. Just the way Lee had approached him, taking charge, triggered the old, familiar patterns that represented real sex to Vince. The sexual contest was on! The challenge had been laid down! With strength and agility that surprised and delighted Lee, he almost magically got them turned around. She was now on her knees on the seat, her head resting on her elbows on the side of the tub. He stood behind her in the tub, still impaled and still quite hard. "We'll see who gets fucked silly!" he growled as he made the first forceful thrust. His words were so much what she longed for that she rocketed halfway to full arousal instantaneously. As if determined not to be outdone in the surprise department, he began pounding into her with a force that created a splash and an audible slap each time he bottomed out, and forced her to raise up on her hands to keep from scraping her elbows on the stone edge of the tub. Complaining about any discomfort or rough treatment was last thing on Lee's mind. All the years she had speculatively evaluated Vince, she had guessed that he would be a good match for her sexually, and he was proving it. Her gambling approach tonight was paying off in a big way. She had barely changed her position to accommodate the force of his thrusts when she felt his hand reach around for her pussy. His fingers expertly sought out her straining clit, then pinched! It started as pain, but within microseconds it morphed into a galvanizing sexual pulse and she did not even have time to register surprise before an orgasm swept through her. She retained just enough awareness to stifle the scream that her body tried to release, but nothing could stop the intense convulsions that forced Vince to grab her around the waist to keep her face from falling to the stone. He had not come as she convulsed, both because he had not yet recovered enough, and because of his efforts to protect her from injury. As she started to taper off, he pulled her back against himself and sat down in the bottom of the tub with her on his lap, still impaled. His chin was right at water level. He nibbled and kissed her shoulders, and one hand toyed with a bullet-like nipple while the other arm remained securely clamped around her waist. She had hoped for a strong reaction from him, but had thought she might have to work him up to it. His sudden, energetic response was beyond her fondest hopes, and she was basking in the promise of at last finding a compatible partner. In the midst of her mental rejoicing, she felt him sag and knew exactly what it was. Almost leaping upward, she came off of his cock and spun around to face him, one hand taking a firm hold on his shaft. Getting her face right in his, she almost shouted. "No, dammit!! Don't go there! No guilt trips! Vince, you are a stud! I don't know what the problem is, but Theresa has not been doing it for you for at least six months. You're dying inside, I can tell, 'cause I am, too. I need it! You need it! We're really good together, so don't you dare wimp out on me! Do you hear?!" He just looked at her with wide eyes and a troubled look. She softened her tone and went on, stroking his face gently with one had and slipping the other down to cradle his balls. "I'm not out to break up your marriage, Vince. I don't want another husband, ever. But I need good, hard sex, and I need lots of it. You do, too. I can tell. We can make this work. Nobody will be hurt. Come on, that was a good start, but let's get to a bed." In typical Lee fashion, she left no room for discussion. She stood and hauled Vince to his feet. She quickly stepped out of the tub and picked up her towel and key, and his suit and key, ignoring the drinks he had brought. When Vince reached for his suit, she giggled and pulled it away. He picked up his towel and wrapped it around his waist, his erection pushing it way out in front. Then, to her surprise and delight, he made a lightning quick move and had her draped over his shoulder, naked and squealing like a schoolgirl. She was actually very nervous about returning to the room exposed as she was, but there was no way she could let him know that. The game was on, and she could not wait to play it all out. The squeal had been a reaction of surprise, but she recovered quickly. First, she stuck her tongue in his ear. As he flinched, she somehow managed to catch the top of his towel with her toe and unravel the fold, leaving him as naked as she was. Not done demonstrating her agility, she got her foot right up against his cock. She held it in place, but every step ended up as a stroke. Both entered her room fully charged for the next round, luckily unseen by anyone else. As focused as she was, Lee did not let the great feelings from their initial encounter in the hot tub distract her from the main objective. The sex had already been great, and she was looking forward to a night of it. One night, however, was not what she was after. She badly needed a compatible, frequent, long-term partner, and she could think of no one better than Vince. He was married, and probably wanted to stay that way. That was a good thing, as far as she was concerned. There was no room in her life for a suitor panting after her, but there was a big hole that could only be filled by lots of high-intensity sex. Vince was just the right man to fill that need. For the next few hours, until absolutely no part of his body worked any more, Lee staked her claim. By the time he climbed back to some semblance of consciousness in the early morning, Vince had joined the long list of his ancestors who had kept mistresses on the side. The circumstances were quite different than in the old neighborhood. Lee earned more money than did Vince, so she did not need to be 'kept' in the traditional way. His wife had certainly not become fat or unappealing, nor had she turned against sex. Oh, she was no longer interested in the kind of sex they used to have, the kind he and Lee had spent the night having. The times when he had romanced Theresa, though, there had been no lack of passion. As he struggled to collect some shreds of rationality, Vince expected a massive assault of guilt and shame. Instead, he felt almost euphoric. One part of his terribly scrambled life, a very important part, was now back in his control. His sense of loyalty to his wife was there, but this had turned into one of their battles, in his mind. She was the one who had decided against sex as they had always enjoyed it. She was the offender, while he was defending his rights. Many times in the following weeks and months, Vince would have to battle the guilt, but Lee had successfully secured her stud service, and Vince's sexual deprivation was over. As he awoke more fully, he realized he was spooned against Lee's back. Without thought, he kissed the back of her neck, and behind her ear, something he did to Theresa frequently. This woke Lee, and she experienced the predictable shiver before the significance hit her. Quickly but gently, she turned in his arms, hugged him and kissed him, then softly said "Vince, I hope you understand: there's not going to be any falling in love here, OK? I like you a lot, and you're a great lover. But I'm not yours. This is an arrangement, something we both need." "I will not take any chance on hurting my career, so we absolutely have to act the same around each other. We've got to keep the arguments going, or people will be suspicious. Where to get together is going to be tough to work out, but hey, we're pros." "Another thing: if you and Theresa get things straightened out sexually, I'll back off. I'll miss it terribly, but I'm not a home-wrecker. Now, let me show you why it's worth it." Almost before she stopped speaking, she had rolled him onto his back and perched atop him. With no regard for his bladder, she settled down on his morning glory. She then leaned forward onto him, rubbed her nipples against his chest, and jammed her tongue deep in his mouth. She began a vigorous back and forth motion that left considerable doubt about which would occur first - the come of his life, or amputation of his cock. ------- The morning after Theresa's redirection of her life and Vince's fall from fidelity, Betty had a much more pleasant encounter. She had gotten a description of Julia from Julie, and had no trouble at all spotting her in the diner. She was greatly impressed that an important professional woman would show the courtesy of getting there ahead of her guest. "Dr. Waxman, I presume?" Betty quipped as she walked up to the table. After sitting down, she added "And how many times have you heard that stupid line?" Julia laughed and answered, "About as many times as I've heard 'Doc, do you think I'm crazy?'" "Well, the way I feel this morning, even a bad line sounds brilliant to me," Betty told her. "So, things went well last night?" "Especially afterward," Betty said, then giggled. "Ooops! Shouldn't talk loose around a shrink, should I? Might label me as a nympho, or something." "If you are one, Betty, then I'm delighted to have the company." That brought stares from neighboring patrons because of the volume of their laughter. "After all these years, Alan can still turn me inside out, and I can't get enough of it," Betty explained. "Now you're being cruel, Betty. My husband Frank and I still wear out beds at an alarming rate, too. But he's on another of his damned long trips, and I'm about to redefine 'horny'." "How much longer will he be gone?" "Until Saturday noon." "Then how about you come to our house for dinner tomorrow night. I'm sure it's pretty humble compared to your place, but..." she stopped at the look of concern on Julia's face. "Oh, sorry! I didn't mean to presume..." "No, Betty, that's not it. I would love to join you. I was just concerned about ethics. I'm sure you know that I have met with Julie and Terry. It is not wise to socialize with patients. However, they are not the patients, Theresa is. They were just resource contacts, so I will be delighted to join you. I'm afraid I sometimes finish rather late, though." "That's OK. You just go home and get into shorts and sandals, then call when you leave your house. We'll eat when you get there." "Shouldn't I wear a top? Or has your house gone topless since Theresa stripped?" After the laughter subsided a little, Betty asked "How did this turn into a bad joke contest? Speaking of Theresa stripping, yesterday was one for the ages." As they ordered and ate, Betty gave a detailed account of the evening, barely finishing before Julia had to leave for her first session of the day. "I've got a ton of questions, but I promise, no shop talk tomorrow night. Well, at least not when anyone else is around. Thanks so much for the invite. I'm looking forward to it." ------- It was nearly seven thirty before Julia arrived at the Voss home for dinner, but everyone had been warned that it might be late, and they were all glad to see her. Julie and Terry were a little apprehensive, knowing that Julia held secrets of theirs that must never be let out. Pro that she was, Julia took care of that situation right away. She took them briefly aside, individually, and told them that she was only there because they were not her patients: otherwise she would not have come. She also reassured them about the confidentiality of anything they had said. Not that she had been worried about it, but Julia was almost as restored by her relaxed evening at Betty's house as she was by Frank's pampering. Keen observer that she was, she could not miss all the little evidences of the strong bond between the family members. Julia had not met Glen before, but she could not miss what was in his eyes. This was a young man suffering from guilt and loss. It was the guilt that worried her. He apparently blamed himself for the pregnancy. It was wrong of Julie to let him harbor that guilt. Then again, she could not think of any easy way for Julie out of her dilemma, either. Ellie was so obviously in love with Terry that it was both sweet and poignant. He was just as smitten, but was holding it in, for reasons she could easily understand. She had a bit of a jolt once when she saw Ellie and Glen together. Her immediate impression was that they were lovers, from the way they interacted. After considering the possibility, though, she thought it unlikely in that family. Also, Ellie still had that virgin aura about her. As for Betty, well, she was where Julia wished she could get all of her patients. Betty was happy and secure in her life. Of course there were problems, some of them nasty, but they did not dent her contentment. Alan was very different from her Frank, but she could see how Betty could love him so deeply. Julia knew that she wanted Betty on her short list of close friends. She also knew she wanted to do everything she could to heal the family's wounds. It was becoming personal, but sometimes, that just happened. ------- Chapter 12 It was good that Julia had her relaxing, restorative dinner at Betty's house, because a few days later, Theresa severely tested her professional aplomb. "I'm going to have more children, and do it right this time," Theresa said, before she was fully seated for her appointment. Julia did not know if Theresa caught a flash of astonishment and disbelief on her face, or not. Judging from the beatific look on Theresa's face after her proclamation, she was probably not very aware of Julia, or anything else in the office. Knowing that openly trying to dissuade a patient was seldom effective, Julia launched a cautious discussion. She was careful not to give the impression that she was raising problem areas, but managed to touch on all of the areas that could make the plan difficult. In every case, it was apparent that Theresa had worked through them very thoroughly. The subject of Vince was left until last, and when Julia asked how he would react, she once again had to fight for composure. "I'll probably have to divorce him. I couldn't raise the kids the right way with his attitudes as they are now. I want the first baby to be his, though, so I'll wait until I'm pregnant." Even though she somehow controlled her facial expression, Julia needed several seconds to find her voice. She hoped it came across as a thoughtful pause, but she had no confidence of that. Before she could frame her response, Theresa went on. "I know it's your responsibility to keep me from doing foolish things, and I know this may all sound very foolish and hasty. But I am determined. This is what I am going to do with the rest of my life. If I don't, I will consider my whole life wasted. What I hope you can do is help me to do it right." Julia had always known that Theresa was intelligent and strong-willed. Up until now, though, all of their interactions had been when Theresa was marginally rational, or worse. For the first time, Julia saw the force that was within her: the force that had made her the controlling, insensitive mother she had been. She also saw a level of determination that she rarely encountered. Theresa's life had a new direction, and she was absolutely and irrevocably fixed on it. "What I need most, Julia," Theresa again continued before Julia could respond, "is for you to help me stay away from the old patterns. If I make the same mistakes again, I think I will kill myself." The last comment sobered them both. Julia finally decided to drop the professional mask a bit. "Theresa, you surprised me like few patients have. I cannot say that I am thrilled with your decision, but I can see why you have arrived at it. I can also tell that no one will be able to change your mind. I will help you all I can." "If I had had your help twenty years ago, I could still be looking forward to my daughter's picture-book wedding," Theresa said softly. "We can never be sure of those things," Julia said, trying to keep her from getting morose. "You have decided to try to get over the bad things from the past by doing them right in the future. That is admirable, and we need to focus on that." They chatted for a few minutes, then Julia felt she had to ask "Will you see Terry again?" "Oh, yes!" Theresa answered, visibly brightening. "He agreed to see me regularly. He said not every week, but I'll take it." "So, do you think serving dinner naked and shaving was instrumental?" "Absolutely!" She went on to tell the story in detail, while Julia pretended she had not heard anything about it. Julia marveled at the difference from the Theresa that frantically dashed from her office a few days earlier, in a desperate hurry to humiliate herself on the small chance that it would gain her contact with her son. "Are you glad that humiliation is behind you?" Julia asked. "I don't think of it as humiliation," Theresa answered. "Well... I guess I do, but it was justified, and it worked. Id rather not be done yet, though?" "You mean you want to do it again?" "I don't think I would serve dinner naked again. Although, if Betty asked me to I probably would. Anyway, I would like to be naked when I meet with Terry for a while. I think it is necessary. He's still not convinced I have changed. He won't let me, though." "How long would you want to keep that up?" "I'd know when it was time to stop," Theresa assured Julia. Julia just raised an eyebrow, clearly wanting Theresa to say more. That brought a blush and a giggle before she said "I had decided that when he got a hardon, I would know things had changed." Julia could not restrain a chuckle at that, and said "Tell me what you mean." "Right now, I am kind of a monster to him, not even really a woman. I saw him looking me over, and his face showed surprise. When he looked at me and got aroused, I'd know that he sees a woman first and not just a monster." "Makes sense, I guess," said a bemused Julia. "Of course it might have been so much fun getting him aroused, I might have stayed naked a while longer," Theresa said with a giggle, "but seriously, he has to see me as a woman before there is any chance he will see me as his mother." "Theresa, we've talked about that a lot. Don't get your hopes up that it will ever get to that point," Julia cautioned her patient. "Oh, I know, and I'm learning to accept that, thanks to you. Having more kids will soften the blow if it never happens, but that won't stop me from trying." 'One for the books', Julia thought to herself. Rarely had a patient's intelligence, drive and spirit been so hidden by the trauma of circumstances. Even more rarely had such a dramatic turnaround occurred. She wished she could take more credit for it, but she always rejoiced when good things happened for a patient. Theresa's children were still aloof to her, and now she was facing divorce, but she had a new purpose in her life. All of her natural abilities were again in play, but this time, tempered by a massive dose of reality therapy. ------- The start of school brought new challenges to both Julie and Terry, and a new outlook for Ellie. In the two weeks before the first day of classes at the high school, Ellie pestered her mother mercilessly, and the two spent many hours at malls and discount stores. Suddenly, triggered by her interludes with Glen and driven by her love for Terry, Ellie was anxious to look good - to look sexy. So thrilled was she at the turnaround in her daughter's attitude, Betty bit her tongue many times to avoid mentioning budget constraints. Fortunately, Ellie was well aware of their financial limitations, and tried to be thrifty. At home, the newly fashion-aware girl spent more hours trying combinations. Many times she would ask Betty or Glen how a particular outfit looked, seemingly afraid of the answer. Both mother and brother, of course, worked hard to redirect her diplomatically from choices that did not flatter her. For Ellie, it was like starting from scratch, because her appearance had just never mattered much before. Now, it mattered a great deal. After complimenting her on a particularly appealing get-up, Glen could not resist some teasing. "Babe, you're heartless and cruel, you know?" "Huh?" "Yup. Here you are, turning yourself into this sexy bombshell, and none of those drooling high school guys has a ghost of a chance. You're already taken." "I wish!" Softening his tone from teasing to sympathetic, Glen told her "Babe, it's obvious how you feel." She blushed brightly, but did not deny it. "Yeah, but it takes two." "I think you've already got him. Just remember all the crap he's dealing with and hang in there." "Well, I wasn't about to give up. Couldn't, anyway," she said, eyes moistening slightly. "Whatever happens, you're looking great," he assured her. "You were the one who said I had to bait the man-trap better." "I'm glad to see you appreciate big brother's advice for the gold mine of wisdom that it is." That, of course, initiated a short tussle that ended with her cuddled on his lap for a few minutes. ------- The impending start of school hit Julie very hard. All summer, she had fought valiantly against self-pity over the scratch-and-claw existence she and Glen had been forced into. Just reminding herself that she had caused it was enough to help her regain control. But now, just being exposed to Ellie's excitement almost pushed her over the edge. A year ago, Julie had been looking forward to her senior year of high school. She was unquestionably a star on campus, and she was in love with the number one hunk of the school. Things were not good at home, but no worse than usual. There was a huge problem looming over college, but even that had not been enough to dampen her enthusiasm. Thinking about high school deepened her depression, especially the way it ended. Living with a friend, pregnant by her own action but driven to it, the future she had always looked forward to no longer possible: all of those things weighed heavily on her mind. Right now, she was supposed to be heading off to college with Glen for four romantic years. Instead, she was fighting through morning sickness every day in a bathroom shared with Glen and his brother and sister. She was trying to patch herself together enough to go to work and look competent and professional for her wealthy customers. Just their casual attitude toward the expensive furniture she knew she would never be able to afford was another painful reminder of what she had let herself in for. Her parents were responsible for her present plight, and her hatred of them surged. She almost cancelled her next visit with her mother, but after what Theresa had done in front of them all, just to keep contact with Terry, she knew how her mother would react to even one missed get-together. Theresa sometimes felt like a screen had been removed from between her and the people she was closest to. Suddenly, she could sense how they were feeling, something that had never been important to her before... before her children left her. All of her considerable intelligence and powers of observation had lately been consumed with evaluating every little action and expression of Julie and Terry, when she got the precious chance to be with them. As soon as Julie came into the house, Theresa sensed the depression, and it took very little time to deduce the reason. First going through her own struggle to keep from breaking down at her own guilt, she set about to do whatever she could to distract Julie. It was another source of guilt when she realized she wasn't very good at comforting because of sheer lack of practice. There were precious few topics where they shared common interest and experience, and Theresa could only think of one. She began reminiscing out loud about when she was pregnant with Julie, trying to be as light and humorous as possible. She tried to get Julie talking about how she felt, whether she was gaining weight yet, had the doctor put her on some good supplements, etc. She mentally slapped herself several times as she almost fell into her old know-it-all role. It was disturbingly difficult to just relate incidents and ask questions. What a nasty person she had been! As she talked, Theresa was filled with thoughts of herself again being pregnant, and it gave her conversation a joy and intensity that Julie could not help but notice. Thinking of herself and her daughter sitting together, nursing their babies made Theresa's face literally glow. Much to her amazement, Julie felt better when she left her mother's house. That was a completely new experience. Every previous visit had taken a toll, requiring Glen's help to get over it. The next morning, when Glen left the store at six, he was amazed to find Theresa standing by his car. "Can I talk to you for a minute, Glen?" Nodding, he opened the passenger door and she slipped in. When he was seated, he looked at her questioningly. She handed him an envelope, saying "There's five hundred in there for..." "Mrs. Menconi, you know I won't take your money. We're making it on..." "Glen, please let me say this, OK? And please call me Theresa... or Bitch, if you want to. 'Mrs. Menconi' shows more respect than I deserve." That took the wind out of Glen, and he said softly, "OK... Theresa. I'll listen, but you know how we both feel." "Yes, I know. Right now, Julie is very, very down. I think it's because school is starting, and she's supposed to be away at college... with you. I took that from her, and unfortunately, I can't fix it." "What I want you to do with the money is something romantic to give Julie a little boost. A couple of nights at a hotel or a B&B; nice meals out; there's a good touring show in town. Don't let her know it's from me." "But she's knows I can't afford that," he objected. "Tell her a relative sent gift certificates for a belated wedding present. Tell her you won a contest at work. Make up something. Just make her feel special for a couple of days. Will you do that? Please?" Theresa's lip was quivering as she made her plea. Her request hit Glen hard at several levels. He and Julie had vowed to take nothing from the Menconis. On the other hand, Theresa's request fueled some strong guilt in Glen. He had definitely been neglecting Julie lately. It was between class sessions at college, but he had not slowed down, studying ahead for classes in the next quarter. He had noticed that Julie was down, but had chalked it up to pregnancy. A little getaway would be wonderful, but could he enjoy it, knowing it was from the Menconis. "Does your husband know about this?" he blurted out. "No, of course not. I don't know if you were aware of it, but I have a fund of my own. Does it make it easier to accept if it's just from me? I had hoped it would." He had to pause before responding to that. This was the woman who had just a few days ago exposed herself in the most complete way possible, just on the chance it would gain her contact with her son. This was the woman who had certainly shown every evidence of a radical and sincere turnaround. He had urged Julie to re-establish contact with her in the first place. Was this just a natural result of that? The money probably meant little to Theresa, and it could mean a lot to the young couple. There were so many things they needed, and... NO! he would not go there. They had decided they would have absolutely no dependence on her parents, and they were right. They would not let the Menconis buy off their guilt for the past. "Look, Glen, I know what you're thinking. I understand why you can't accept help from us, and I won't try to change your mind. This is just something that I think Julie needs right now for her spirit. I would like to able to do little things, just special for Julie, once in a while. If you don't want that, I'll understand. But, please! At least this once, will you take it and give her a boost?" "Theresa, I'm sorry, but I can't. She would never tolerate it, and I would have to lie to her about where it came from. If it's any consolation, I believe your motives are pure, and I do appreciate the thought." "You have accomplished one important thing, though. I have been neglecting her too much, and I needed to be waked up. I will do what I can with the money we have to give her some romantic times. I thank you for caring." "Oh, I care! More than you will ever know! Can I... will you... if I find some really great deals, like coupons or specials, can I tell you about them?" "That would be fine. Look, maybe at some point, Julie will be able to take gifts from you, but I'm afraid she's not there, yet." "How about you? Could you take them?" "It's all about Julie and how she feels, Theresa." ------- Glen took Theresa's visit to heart. The next time Julie came home from her last shift before her days off, he whisked her into his parents' good car and threw a suitcase in the back seat. Betty and Ellie had put it together for him. A cooler with essential food makings was already in the trunk. They didn't have much money, but the cabin was free, the weather was great, and they would be by themselves. The food in the cooler was strictly for breakfast and snacks. They would spend the money to eat in town the other meals. Caught totally off-guard, and weary from her day of work, Julie did not react with the glee that Glen had hoped for. "But what about your work? Aren't you on tomorrow?" "Nope. I swapped so we could have the days off together for once." That went a long way toward changing her attitude, but she still had objections. "It's almost three hours up there. It's late, and I've had a long day." "The seat folds way back, and there's a blanket if you get cold." "But I've still got my work clothes on, heels and all!" "So, take off whatever is uncomfortable - the more the better!" With that, he looked over and waggled an eyebrow in classic Groucho fashion. That finally broke through, and she relaxed and giggled. Suggestive remarks had been far too rare lately, and their lack had added to her feelings of depression. Now in her second trimester, the physical changes were becoming apparent. She could still wear most of her clothes, but just barely. Her tummy was at the point that only the slimness of the rest of her body proved that it wasn't just a weight problem. Her breasts had grown a little and the nipples seemed to be darkening. With surprising speed, Julie's heels and pantyhose were puddled on the floor of the front seat. She looked over at Glen, who was watching as much as he could while maintaining driving safety. Then, she hiked her skirt well above her waist, and slipped off her panties, not hurrying to push the skirt back down. The sexy grin she threw at him almost had him driving off the road. Glen had two reactions to Julie's little show. First, of course, his jeans became quite uncomfortable. But the most important reaction was chagrin. He had been a clueless dope! There had been very little sexy, suggestive play between them since the marriage. Oh, they had made love, often with great intensity. What had been missing was the joyous celebration of their beautiful young bodies that had been so much a part of their courtship days. His mother had talked to him about how fragile a woman's self-image could be as she swelled with child. He had heard, and thought he understood, but he really had no idea. Julie was starving for affirmation that she was still appealing to him. There was no doubt she was - very much so, but he couldn't expect her just to know that. He had to keep reminding her, probably more often as she got bigger. Betty had tried to tell him, but until that moment, he had been either too dense or too busy to really catch on. With her skirt back in place, Julie settled into the seat and let the back recline so she could rest. Thinking quickly, Glen said, "Damn! Is that all the more comfortable you're going to get?" "What? You expect me to put on a show for all the truckers?" "Sure, as long as I get a front-row seat. Poor guys need something to keep them awake, anyway." "Hah! As if a fat, pregnant broad is going to get them excited!" she spat out. There it was. The proof of his stupidity and insensitivity. Honestly, he thought she looked great as her term advanced. He just had not done enough to let her know he felt that way. "Well, it sure gets this driver excited," he said, twisting himself toward her a bit so she could see the bulge in his pants. She noticed, and giggled again, a sound that thrilled him more than he remembered. She unlatched her seat belt, and reached into the back seat for the blanket, which she opened and spread over her lap. Then, eyes fixed on his, she worked under the blanket for a moment, then tossed her skirt theatrically over her shoulder into the back seat. "I'm not ready to flash the truckers, but if MY driver is interested..." and she lifted the blanket to display her bare lower half. "Is he ever!" Saying that, Glen reached over and stuck his hand between her legs. Once again, her reaction surprised him with its suddenness and intensity. She reached her outside hand down to the seat control and reclined it all the way. Grabbing his wrist with both hands, she held his hand firmly against her pussy and rolled on her side to face him. Immediately, she started humping herself on his thumb, which was against her lips. Glen tried to turn his hand so he could use his fingers, but that was not in her plan. She clamped her thighs tightly, holding him in place, and kept up her humping motions. He got the idea, and started moving his hand, crooking his thumb so the knuckle bumped over her clit area with each thrust. That was exactly the stimulation Julie wanted. She had clamped both hands around his arm and was bracing herself against him for leverage. For a while, they were both contributing the motions. When the blanket slipped off onto the floor, Glen was sure the interlude would end, but Julie seemed to ignore it. It was ten o'clock at night and they were on a rural section of freeway, in the right lane. There was relatively little chance of anyone seeing them, and Julie was definitely on her way to a climax. She stopped her own motions and just let Glen do the work, seemingly oblivious to her exposure. Just as he felt the little jerks and tremors that signaled impending orgasms for her, he saw the lights of a truck coming up in the left lane. He considered speeding up to keep it behind them, but he was already going as fast as he felt comfortable with, given the distractions. Julie seemed unconcerned with the approaching onlooker, if in fact she even realized he was catching up. She was now gasping erratically and her fingernails were digging into his arm. Glen was frantic to get her off before the truck pulled alongside and spoiled it. When the truck was right behind them, she still had not come, and there was no way she could miss the noise. Glen took his foot off the gas, hoping to get the truck past them in a hurry. Apparently, the driver still got a look, because he gave a short blast of his air horn when the cab was even with them. Glen's heart sank, thinking that their wonderful little playtime was ruined. Instead, to his shock, the blast of the horn started Julie bouncing and writhing in an intense orgasm. Somehow, the driver could see what was going on, and gave a series of six or seven shorts blasts as the decelerating car fell back from his view. Glen half expected the truck to slow to stay with them, but it held its speed. As it pulled in front of them into the right lane, all of its lights were flashing in salute for about fifteen seconds. When she stopped shuddering, Julie started to giggle uncontrollably. "Didn't know what an exhibitionist I married!" he chortled. "Guess we should have an audience more often, huh?" "Sure! Alan or Marty can watch any time they want." When he gasped, she giggled even harder, pleased at provoking that reaction. When she stopped giggling, she hugged his arm, then reached over to his crotch, her intent obvious. "Huh uh, Baby. Let's save that for the cabin. Why don't you sleep a while so you have the energy when we get there?" "But I'm not sleepy, now," she objected. "Hmmm. Would another one of those help?" she didn't say anything, but picked up her panties and pantyhose from the floor and got them under her bottom as best she could. She grabbed the blanket, turned onto her back, and pulled it up over her. After only a couple of seconds, she shoved it back on the floor, and sat with her crotch on display. "Okay, Lover. Put me to sleep," she said as she took his hand and placed it on her pussy. "But what about the trucks?" he asked. "God, that was intense," was all she said, and spread her legs as wide as they could go. He was aroused by her erotic action, but he also sensed another evidence of his own lack of attention. She was so starved for validation of her sexiness that she even allowed ogling by strangers, something very much unlike her. He was really falling down on the job. That problem ended tonight, he vowed. He did his best to put her to sleep. In the more familiar position, he did all the things to her pussy that he knew she liked. He actually got her off twice, and after the second, she showed signs of being too tender for more. She was not asleep, but very close. He was able to snag the blanket and bring it up over her, rewarded by a contented hum. He was going to just let her go to sleep, but he happened to think about the baby. That was something else he had not paid enough attention to. Working his hand slowly under the blanket, he moved it over her tummy. The blouse was in the way. As he sought out the lowest button, he worried briefly because his hand was damp and a little sticky with her juices. Deciding the blouse would wash just fine, he set about unbuttoning it. He was sure she knew what he was doing, but she made no move to aid him. Another lesson, he thought wryly. She liked him doing intimate things for her, and he had neglected that, too. With the blouse open, he put his hand on her exposed, gently rounding tummy and started caressing very lightly, from her pubic hair to under her breasts, from side to side. He used long, slow strokes, sometimes barely touching her skin. Within less than five minutes, she was snoring softly. ------- The short, unpaved drive from the county road into their cabin was rough enough to rouse Julie. She had been sleeping so soundly that she was a little disoriented at first, especially with the feeling of the car's upholstery against her bare bottom. It did not take long for memory of the trip to solidify, and she looked over at Glen with a drowsy smile. Since the car was parked, he leaned over and gave her a long, gentle kiss. "Guess I'd better pull some clothes on," she said. "Nope! I'm hiding all your clothes. For the next two days I want to look at just Julie. I've been stupid and haven't spent nearly enough time ogling lately." She managed to say "Pervert!" before breaking into a giggle. He expected her to protest again, and reach for her clothes, but she gave him another lesson. She opened the door and stepped right out, leaving the blanket crumpled on the seat. Opening the back door, she asked "Can I at least get out my cosmetics before you hide everything else?" Would he ever get this all figured out? What he thought of as a playful threat actually excited her. She wanted him to look at her body, to worship it. She needed it! "It will be easier just to take the whole thing in," he laughed. "I'll trust you to obey the dress code. You will, won't you?" "Yes, Master," she said with a dramatic show of humility. With Julie wearing only her bra and unbuttoned blouse, they took the suitcase and the cooler into the cabin and went through the few steps needed to get it ready for occupancy. When Glen went out to start filling the hot tub so it would be ready in the morning, he came back grinning widely. "They must have called the neighbor to get the tub ready for us! We can jump in any time." The hot tub was the one real luxury at the otherwise spartan site. "Not when you're so grossly overdressed," she told him, unzipping his jeans as she said it. He faked resistance, but made sure it was not enough to prevent her from baring his cock. It was a relief, since it had spent most of the trip straining against his jeans. Once in the tub, she seemed determined not to let any water come between them, she stayed so close. They had barely sat down when she started stroking him with intent. It was not tender, casually caressing, it was production ball-draining, and it worked in a very short time. Still holding him as he softened, she laid her head against his chest and hugged him with her other arm. "This was a great idea, Honey. I'm so glad you thought of it." "I need to confess something. Your mother started it." At her expression of surprise, he told her about his early-morning chat with Theresa, and how he had arranged this little getaway. "I don't know if I'm happy about what she said or not," Julie admitted. "You mean about offering the money?" "No, that she knew how I was feeling. She never paid attention to that before," she explained. "So why wouldn't you be happy?" After heaving a big sigh, she explained "Because I don't want to start liking her. If she keeps doing these thoughtful, motherly things, it will be harder to stay angry at her." One thing about women that Glen learned, was that when you don't know what to say, don't try to just wing it. He said nothing, just stroked her water-slick skin. "Julie, I have to apologize. I have turned into a grind. I want so much to make things work for us, that I'm afraid I almost forgot who I am doing it for." "I know how hard you are working, Honey, and I appreciate it. I don't want to be a moody, pregnant female, but... I guess that's just what I am." They were silent for a while, then she asked timidly "Do you really want me not to wear clothes?" "You bet I do! I'm not going to make the same mistake again. I'm going to perv on my wife's gorgeous, naked body every chance I get." "You mean until I get really fat, huh?" "No, I mean until you're ready to go to the hospital and have the baby. As soon as you're home, I want to start ogling again. I'll bet the sight of you naked, nursing our baby, will be one of the most beautiful things I will ever see." She had no words in response to that. All she could do was hug him tighter, squeeze his cock almost too hard, and fight back sniffles. He wasn't done with the emotional bombardment, yet. Theresa's offer had really shaken him up. It had shamed him to think that her mother, who had insensitively abused her all those years, noticed his wife's distress when he did not. He had thought about it constantly since then, usually berating himself for not treating the most precious thing he had the way she deserved to be treated. He lived with a perfect example, his father. He himself had for years treated his sister the right way. "Baby," he said after another tender quiet spell, "I've heard about all kinds of cremes and things that pregnant woman use to keep from stretch marks and stuff. Do you use those?" "I've started using them. Why?" "Um, can we make it my job to rub them on?" Whether their young marriage was at a critical point or not, the brief getaway and Glen's commitment to give her the proper attention could not have been more timely. Their first few months together had been dominated by survival, individually and as a couple. They had to struggle to survive the terrible shock of Julie's pregnancy and the guilt that each felt for causing it. Then, they had to survive economically as a new household. There had been precious little time and energy left to build the kind of bond that both envied in Betty and Alan. Not that the survival issues had been resolved, but with some distance, they were a bit less threatening. As happens so easily, they had settled into a rut, and it took Theresa's well-intentioned interference to jolt them from it. ------- If the start of school was tough for Julie because of the loss it represented, it was even harder on Terry. He would have to go back with classmates, most of whom he was sure knew of his arrest and incarceration. During his sentence, he had thought a lot about the assistant principal who had caught him. He knew she must have planted the pills in his locker, and he feared she might still have it in for him. The girl who had given him the pills was gone. She was supposed to have graduated with Glen and Julie, but was so broken up over having gotten Terry in trouble that he did not know if she had made it. His other three sex partners were still in school. He no longer had any desire to be with them, and he would have to work that out. In truth, he had little desire to be in school. He was sure all the kids would seem juvenile, his time at the center having changed him that much. Only two things kept him from just dropping out and doing carpentry jobs. First, he still wanted to try for a scholarship. He no longer had to worry about fighting with his parents about which college. Now, he had to find a way just to get to college. The other reason to go to school, and a big one, was because of Ellie - Marty, too, but Ellie in particular. It would be something they shared, even though she was a year behind him. He had noticed the clothes she was acquiring. She looked so good, he wished he could declare his feelings for her, just so he could openly claim her at school. The way she looked at him and the way she acted around him had him worried. He was afraid her friends would notice, and she would be ridiculed for falling for a convicted druggy. He did not want that for her. In a family discussion, he had tried to get agreement to keep his living arrangement secret, but she was having none of it. Ellie seemed eager to brag about having him in her house. During the summer, Alan had purchased another used car. There were just too many people with too many places to go. Glen and Julie would be getting their own as soon as possible, but that was not yet. Ellie was declared in charge of that car, and on the first day of school, she drove Marty and Terry. Terry's worst fears were realized before he got in the door. "Well, Menconi, let's see if we can just get this out of the way and get you back in rehab where you belong" was the comment that jolted the three of them as they barely got in the door. It was his nemesis the assistant principal. There were students all around, and many of them heard what she had said. Ellie was so angry she could not think straight. Marty, however, took the time to look around and remember who was there, and who had heard. When Ellie started to move toward the woman, Terry restrained her by grabbing her hand. The shock of the first time he had done that was all that kept her from attacking the woman. "Ellie, just let it go! Don't do anything. Don't say anything. Please!" This was what Terry had feared most of all, that his mistake would somehow hurt Ellie. It was why he had refused to commit himself. "Let's see where you've hidden it this time," the woman was saying as she grabbed Terry's backpack. From his time inside, he had learned not to resist, but to remain calm and cooperate. It helped that he needed to make sure Ellie did not do anything that could end up hurting her. The woman must have been seriously disturbed. She took Terry's backpack and dumped the contents on the floor near the wall. Then she got on her knees and examined the meager contents carefully. Marty showed an unexpected streak of resourcefulness right then. He and Terry had become very close in the few weeks they had been together. He was a good judge of character, and knew that Terry was no addict, nor would he ever be. He saw one of his basketball teammates walking by and pulled him over to watch the show, then did the same with a second friend. Ellie caught on and dashed over to a group of three of her friends and soon there was a circle of observant students watching the search. Finding nothing in the contents, the assistant principal examined every compartment of the backpack, even looking for seams along the straps. After that, she made Terry raise his arms and she patted him down. "Don't imagine you can fool me into thinking you learned anything at the center, Menconi. You junkies always go back to the stuff. Did you almost kill that kid over drugs?" She was just going into his pocket when she noticed the crowd surrounding them. "Get to your home rooms, all of you. This is none of your business!" Most started to move away, and Marty said loudly "Please! write down your account of what happened here. Do it as soon as you can, and be thorough!" Ellie caught on and asked her friends to do the same thing. By now, the woman was getting irate. "What are you two hanging around for? I told you to disperse!" she spat at Marty and Ellie. They were helping Terry pick up his things after the other kids had left. Neither said a word, but continued what they were doing, as the starting bell rang. Openly angry now, the assistant principal grabbed the backpacks from both Marty and Ellie. "I'll bet one of you is hiding his stuff for him, aren't you?" Soon their belongings were spread out. Ellie was remarkably calm throughout the whole drama, but when the woman moved toward her after patting down Marty, she looked down at the woman and said "Do you have any idea how much trouble you will be in if you touch me?" "I have a right to search any student I suspect of harboring drugs," was the woman's answer. "And your probable cause is... ?" Terry spoke for the first time in a while. With a positively hateful glare, the assistant stood motionless for a moment, then spat out "Get to class!" and walked away. Because of the general confusion of the first day, Terry's late arrival in home room caused no particular problem. The problem arose when the teacher was handing out the envelopes of locker numbers and combinations. Terry refused to take his, not even touching it. The teacher, nonplussed, laid it on his desk and went on to the next student. Terry abruptly stood up and moved to a vacant desk elsewhere in the room. Of course, his actions could not go unchallenged, and the teacher asked "What is going on, Mr. Menconi?" "I will not be using a locker this year. It is not safe for me to have one." Terry could see from the teacher's expression that he knew what had happened to Terry. The teacher decided not to cause any more disturbance and just glared at Terry for a moment. The expected call to the principal's office came during the next period. When Terry got there, the assistant principal's was also there. He sat down without saying anything, purposely looking only at the principal. "What's this nonsense about a locker?" the assistant asked sarcastically, "are you still sticking with that 'it wasn't mine' story all the junkies use?" Terry kept his gaze on the principal and remained quiet and motionless. "Hey, answer me?" After a long, quiet stare, Terry finally spoke, still looking fixedly at the principal. "We're in your office, Ma'am. Are you running things, or is she." This brought a flush to the principal's face, but she calmed herself and asked "OK. Why did you not take your locker assignment?" "I don't want to give her a chance to plant evidence again." "Oh, please," the principal said. "That is getting pretty tiresome." "Think of it from my point of view," Terry said. "I took those pills - I never denied that. But I never, ever brought a single pill anywhere close to the school." "How do you expect us to believe that?" The principal asked. "The polygraph will prove it," he told her. "Wh... what polygraph?" the assistant asked in a strained voice. "During the lawsuit, I'm sure my lawyer can arrange one." "Wait a minute, Mr. Menconi. You can't sue anyone. You were proven guilty in a court of law. You have no grounds." "Oh, I'm talking about this morning." "What about this morning?" "Juvenile records are by law confidential. She," and he pointed at the assistant as he said it "blabbed it so anyone standing by could hear it. There were quite a few people standing by." "Is that true?" the principal asked the assistant. "I did not say anything illegal," she insisted. "Let's see," Terry said dramatically. "How about..." and he proceeded to quote her comments." "It's your word against mine," the assistant stated, "and you're a convicted junkie. Who do you think they will believe." "Oh, there are at least seven students who will be deposed. When their statements all agree with mine, I think I will be believed." "Is that what you said," the principal asked, this time in a very demanding tone. "I... I guess I got a little worked up," the assistant admitted. "But I was just trying to do my job and keep the school drug free!" The fact of the matter was that Terry was her only 'catch' since being appointed, and the frustration and fear for her assignment had been piling up over the summer. "Mr. Menconi," the principal started in, "why do you think it's right to drag the school through this. After all, you admit you took the pills." "But I never had a pill in my possession for more than a few minutes. I went and got one when I needed it, and took it right away. That brings up an interesting question: where did she get the pills to put in my locker? And another question: how did she ever find out I was taking the pills?" "And you're sticking with that story?" "It will be proven by the polygraph." "But that's not admissible in court," the assistant objected. "This will be a civil suit," Terry responded. "How did you learn so much about the law?" the principal asked. "Haven't you ever heard of jailhouse lawyers? The come in all ages," he shot back. "Damn!" the principal said in frustration. "Did you know?" Terry started in a gentle tone, "that the pills I took were legal prescription medicine in several countries, and now are here?" "Is that true?" the principal asked the assistant. "What does that matter? He took illegal drugs! He admitted it!" "And did you know," Terry continued, "that I am the only first-time offender ever sent to the Center?" "Well, your parents could have gotten you out of that at any time," the assistant explained. "So could you," Terry told the assistant. "Why should I? I caught you! You were guilty! I'm not a damn shrink! It's my job to stop drug use, not coddle you rich kids playing with your chemicals." Terry just looked at the principal and raised an eyebrow in question. When she did not respond, he went on in a very reasonable tone. "I was at a really bad spot. I needed help, and I took the wrong kind of help. Just a little support from either my parents or the school, and I would have been all right. Instead, I got railroaded." "You did not get railroaded! You were guilty!" "What do you call planted evidence?" "Damn!" the principal said again. With a huge sigh, she sank back in her chair. "Give me your lawyer's name as soon as you get one." "Would you like to keep the lawyers out of this?" Terry asked. "What do you mean?" "I'm not out to get rich off of the school board. I know I made a stupid mistake. But my life was disrupted more than it should have been. I just want to get it back on track as much as I can." "Here's the deal: First, you extend my grades last quarter from when I was arrested to be my final grades. Then, you order her to stay ten feet away from me, Marty Voss, and Ellie Voss, and never to mention any of our names to any student, teacher, or staff member, in any circumstance." "Why the other two?" the principal asked. "They were with me this morning. She decided to harass them for staying with me." The principal lowered her face to her hands in frustration. "What else?" "That's it," he assured her. "Well, besides the fact that it must all be in writing and signed before we leave this office. Notarized, too." "But I will have to get it approved and cleared," the principal said. "No!" Terry insisted. "If anyone but us three and a secretary or notary gets involved, the deal is off and I go lawyer shopping." He was making things up as he went along, but he felt pretty confident. "Look," he said, "you have had no reason to talk to me before. If we do this deal, there's a good chance I will be making a speech at graduation. I'm trying my damnedest to get past the screw-up I made. Are you going to give me that chance, or are you going to be like her?" and he pointed at the assistant without looking at her. The principal ended up typing the agreement herself on her terminal. It took three passes before Terry was satisfied, but they all signed it, the assistant very reluctantly. There did not happen to be a notary on the premises, so they called the bank and a man came over and sealed the document. The principal was very, very uncomfortable with a private agreement like that, but was even more uncomfortable with the possibility of a lawsuit. She knew that one such suit usually stopped a career dead. She also had the sense that they had done Terry an injustice. She had developed quite an admiration for him. It was nearly lunch time when they finally parted. Terry took his locker envelope, now that he felt fairly safe. As he left the office, he turned back to the principal and said "Pit Bulls should be kept on a leash." ------- Chapter 13 To say things were strange at the Menconi house would be an understatement. Vince had one more night away to cement his affair with Lee Waters. Knowing how much he was struggling with his infidelity, she went all out to convince him that they needed each other. She did it all without words, and she was very, very persuasive. When they parted at the home airport, it was easy for Vince to agree to their next assignation. Coming home to Theresa was one of the hardest things Vince ever had to do. He made a huge effort to act normally, but he was not at all sure he pulled it off. Fortunately, with relations between him and Theresa as strained and unusual as they had been over the summer, 'normal' was very hard to define. He was so absorbed in his own new situation that it took most of a day before he noticed the change in her. When he took the time to watch her, he was surprised at the relative serenity she displayed. When he left, she had seemed constantly frightened and unsure of herself. Now, he saw just a little of the old Theresa confidence showing through. He wondered what had happened while he was gone. For her part, Theresa watched Vince like a hawk from the time he walked in the door and gave her a perfunctory kiss. He was now just a subject in her master plan for the rest of her life. Because of her newfound awareness of her past misdeeds, she had learned very quickly how to watch and read people. She felt she was quite good at it. Vince was not himself, of that she was certain. There was an edginess about him that simply did not fit his normal self-assured demeanor. At first, she wondered if he was finally coming around, realizing his own culpability in driving away their children. That would be a good thing. The best of all worlds would be for Vince to reform and enter willingly into raising the next phase of their family. Then, she wondered if there was a crisis of some kind at work. 'Before', as she now mentally thought of the time before Terry's arrest, he had shared freely with her on every detail of work. She had no corporate background, but was intelligent enough to understand and discuss things with him. She was his biggest fan, and it had been a strong point in their relationship. Looking back, she could not think of a single time when a work crisis had caused him visible distress, and there had been a few serious ones. No, she did not think his discomfort and disorientation were work-related. She was into her period, so there would be no sex to measure his level of distraction. On several occasions, she did make affectionate moves, and his responses were strange. Before the trip, he had responded to any move on her part with a combination of relief and caution, as if wanting the intimacy, but afraid it might not evolve. Now, he seemed to alternate between an almost desperate clinging and standoffish reluctance. For two days, she puzzled over it before experiencing another epiphany late at night. Vince was cheating on her! It took only microseconds for her to deduce who the woman was. When the realization hit, she was glad they were in bed and he was sleeping, because she probably would have reacted visibly. It was not long, however, before she was able to think about the situation cooly and rationally. First of all, she was not as distressed as she thought she should be. How could that be? Her husband was fucking another woman, a beautiful, sexy woman, a woman he saw frequently at work. The first answer she gave herself was that she had driven him to it. She knew she had been a lousy sex partner all summer, and he was used to a lot more. It was easy to picture him as easy prey for Lee, who Theresa knew instinctively was a very sexual person. Theresa was also sure that Lee was into sex much more like she and Vince used to enjoy. Only her instincts told her that, but she was certain. They had sat at tables with Lee and her former husband Roland on several occasions at company functions, and had danced with each other's spouses numerous times. Theresa had always thought the easy-going, gentlemanly Roland was a mismatch for the hard-driving Lee. News of the divorce, though it had saddened her, had not surprised her. Since she had decided to expand her family, some of the old scheming, conniving Theresa had reappeared. Not in dealing with her children, but in support of her new objectives. The idea that Vince was fucking Lee actually made her plans easier. Given that Vince would never change enough to be the kind of father she wanted for her future offspring, his affair would provide ammunition to make the divorce easier. After gnashing on that line of thinking for a while, Theresa was brought up short in alarm. She had not changed at all! This is what the old Theresa would be doing! For a moment, she actually felt faint, but then started to think about it more carefully. This was for her children - present and future. It's what she had to do. Maybe she was using the tactics of the old Theresa, but this time, her motives were pure. Convinced as she was about Vince and Lee, she wanted to be even more certain, and thought about how to accomplish that. It would be two more days before she really wanted to have sex, because of her period, but she could still tease him. The next morning, Theresa made sure she was up first, and took a quick shower. Then, she waited until he was standing, and walked into the bedroom, naked. "Vince, Honey," she said, "I know I..." and she stopped dead. He was looking at her bare crotch and he had gone absolutely white. In fact, he had to sit heavily on the bed. "I was going to say I haven't been a very good wife, lately, as far as sex. I want to change that, but we'll have to wait another day. I'm sorry." She had said this with a steady voice, although his extreme reaction surprised her. "I see my bare pussy shocked you. I've never done that before, have I? - except when they did it for delivery. While you were gone, I treated myself to a spa, and on a whim, had them do this." She had carefully worked out that little lie. "I had decided to just let it grow out again, but if you like it, I'll keep it shaved. What do you think?" It took an effort to ignore his reaction and go on normally, but she pulled it off quite well. The sight of his wife's bare pussy immediately made Vince think that she had found out and was trying to compete. The thought was not rational, but with the stress his new affair was bringing on him, he was vulnerable to some highly irrational thinking. He was so taken aback that he was not able to steel himself to hide his reaction. As he continued to stare at her crotch, even the fear could not hold off a full erection. He had just begun to soften from his morning hardon, and the view brought it right back. She certainly was a sexy sight! Listening to Theresa's explanation, he got a bit more control of himself and realized it had nothing to do with Lee. There was no way she could have found out. "It... it's... God, it's sexy! You decide, Dear. I love it either way," he managed to get out in a fairly steady voice. "The first week or two while it grows out, it may be a little scratchy," she explained. "It was fun to try it once, but I'm going to grow it back. Think I'll keep it a lot shorter than before, though. Do you want to feel it? I've got a tampon in, so there's no danger of getting anything on your hand." Vince could sense that she had issued some kind of a test, or a challenge. He got up from the bed and walked toward her as steadily and purposefully as he could. Having regained almost all of his composure, he wrapped one arm around her to pull her in for a kiss, while the other hand went down between them to caress the lips with just the beginnings of stubble. After a long kiss, which she thoroughly enjoyed, she broke free and dropped to her knees in front of him. As she brought the head of his cock between her lips, he stammered, "Why... why don't we wait until you can?... Ohhhh!" It had been months since she last blew him, and even after the strenuous trip with Lee, he lost track of anything else from the sensations. As she worked him with all the skill she could muster, she thought 'Wonder if Lee will be pissed when he's one load short next time?' As she did everything she could with her mouth and both hands, she was able to think, and was amazed at how she could actually enjoy it, knowing what she knew. His affair fell right into her hands. Still, she could not help a sense of competing with the other woman, and she did not like to lose. Lee must keep herself bald. Seeing her just now must have made him think she knew. No wonder he almost fainted! ------- Julia had told Theresa she could call any time if she needed to. The call that came later that morning was not at all what she expected. The voice message said "Vince is having an affair. I want to get proof to help with the divorce. Do you know a good detective I can call?" It took Julia until the end of her day to get herself together enough to answer Theresa. When she called, she resisted the temptation to ask any questions, and just told her that the Plonske Agency was considered the best in town. Julia had learned that extending treatment activities or conversations outside of regular sessions was rarely a good idea. Theresa was a little upset that she had to wait until the next morning to call the detectives, but she had no choice, given the late hour. When the assigned detective, a young woman, arrived, Theresa gave her the names, work addresses, and phone numbers, and whatever else she thought would help. With that much information to start, the detective thought it would be relatively easy to get incriminating evidence. She expressed a little skepticism that Theresa had enough information to be sure there truly was an affair. However, she had enough experience to understand wives' special sensitivities in that area. ------- When her period was completely over, Theresa went about seducing Vince into sex. She had carefully thought through her approach to getting pregnant by him. The critical time would be ten to sixteen days out, leaving room for error on her ovulation. Having been on the pills so long, she did not have a good feel for her cycle any more, except for her period arriving like clockwork. She bought a fancy thermocouple temperature device designed specifically to detect the optimum days. From the outset, she knew there might be a problem getting enough sex from him. If he had regular and frequent sessions with Lee, he might be either unable or reluctant to service her those nights. She did not think there was any chance of him getting suspicious because of her increased interest. There was absolutely no reason for him to suspect her desire to get pregnant. Even though she knew it might increase her chances at his attentions, she could not bring herself to return to the old fight-induced bouts of sex. However, she did decide that she had to be much more energetic than in the past few months. She had to at least give him a taste of what he considered the right kind of sex - the kind he was undoubtedly getting from Lee. As she leaned over the bed, loudly urging Vince to pound her harder and harder, Theresa could not help but remember the sensations from their earlier couplings. She also felt some remorse over her impending loss of Vince, something she now considered certain. There was no question they had had something special, even if it was at best 'unusual'. And it was not just the sex, either. They had shared a lot of the same values and desires. That it had all come apart was definitely not a cause for rejoicing. As she felt herself rising toward what promised to be a very big orgasm, Theresa had little trouble pushing nostalgic thoughts of Vince from her mind. This was all for the baby, and that was far more important than her badly-fractured marriage. Just the thought of the baby aroused her further, and within a couple of minutes, she crashed over. Even in the midst of her climax, when she felt him blast away, she felt a little triumph. That was another load Lee would not get. ------- Lee devised a very clever setup for her rendezvous with Vince. Space was admittedly short at the company because of staff expansion. In particularly short supply was meeting space. She contracted with a nearby hotel for permanent use of a small suite, one with a conference table, kitchenette, sleeper sofa and side chairs, and a full bathroom. It would be used for legitimate purposes, to be scheduled by her admin assistant. The hotel had a very good restaurant, and within two weeks, the suite was in high demand. That still left plenty of open time, and Lee and Vince made use of those open periods. Since they had to return to work afterward, they made it a point to strip almost upon entry to keep from giving themselves away by soiled or rumpled clothes. Likewise, they always showered after. Theresa caught what might or might not have been a break as she approached her most fertile period. Lee had to go out of town, without Vince, to return the day after what Theresa estimated as her peak. Theresa learned this from the PI, who was very adept at tracking both of the targets. Lee's trip was a break in that Vince would not get any from Lee, and it would be easier for Theresa to seduce him. However, what if he wanted to 'save' himself the last day or two for Lee's return? ------- The PI took less than a week to learn about the suite and how Lee used it. She already had some dates and times when they had been there alone together. Since it was a work-related site, however, the fact that they were there together, alone, was not as meaningful as if it had been a motel. It looked like electronic wizardry would be needed for the final, damning evidence. In this case, the way the suite was used made things easier. Hotel serving, housekeeping, and maintenance people were in and out of the suite quite often because of its level of use. The PI had a compatriot plant the camera, not wanting to take any chance of her own face being seen. The best disguises for unauthorized entry into hotel rooms were as telephone, HVAC, plumbing, or electrical repair people. These were the outside services most often used. Typically, the fake repair person would enter the room while housekeeping was there, eliminating the need for a key, or for breaking in. Since English was a poor second language for much of the housekeeping staff, a tool box or belt, something that looked like a uniform, and some kind of badge to flash was usually all it took. The most modern cameras were not true real-time. Instead, they were essentially digital cameras that sent the captured image through a transmitter instead of to a flash card. They took images as fast as they could be captured and sent. This produced much higher resolution than the typical surveillance monitor. A sequence of images every 1.5 to 3 seconds would usually produce very acceptable results. Real-time audio monitoring was typically installed, as well. One drawback of the system was the need to have the receiving station nearby. In this case, an adjacent suite became available, and that's when the setup was done. The costs involved were all explained to Theresa, and she did not hesitate at all. This particular case introduced a new issue for the Plonske Agency. Since the suite was used for business purposes, they were flirting at the edges of industrial espionage. They scrupulously avoided recording anyone but the target couple, and in fact had the monitoring technician leave the room when legitimate meetings were going on. In the face of such expertise and technology, it was amazing that any cheating couple could think they would not be discovered if the offended spouses chose to spend the money. Since Theresa already knew who Lee was, it made it that much simpler. ------- Theresa carefully followed her strategy of initiating sex and giving Vince all he could take. Actually, she only did it four times before her estimated high fertility period arrived. She did not want to give him any signals that anything was amiss. Of course, when she started asking for it daily or more during the critical time, that could give it away. Hopefully, Lee being gone would leave him wanting enough so she could get his attention when it counted. It was no sacrifice for Theresa to lure her husband into having sex. As low as her interest was during the awful summer, she now found herself eager. Just as the full realization of what she had done to her children brought about the destruction of her old personality, the new direction in her life had help her re-establish her identity. A lot of the best parts of the old Theresa comprised that identity, including her libido. During the most intense moments of their unions, it was impossible for her not to feel a sense of loss that she was nearing the end of her times with Vince. It had been the dominant factor in her life for over twenty years, and that can never be discarded easily. The rational part of her knew that she and her husband were now too different in their outlooks to have any chance of raising a successful second family. If it were not for the additional children, she was sure she and Vince could have worked out a good life together. But for Theresa, the children, the failures with Terry and Julie, and the promise of redemption with those to come, were the only things that truly mattered any more. By keeping thoughts of the child she would soon be carrying foremost in her mind, Theresa was able to stave off nostalgia and regret, and enter wholeheartedly into what she now considered the best sex she ever had with Vince. For his part, Vince was caught between several competing emotions. In the short time he and Lee had been together, he had become totally hooked. When he was with Theresa, he could not help the comparisons. Over the nearly sex-free summer, he had developed strong negative feelings toward sex with his wife - it just was not the real thing, as far as he was concerned. Coupled with the infrequency of occurrence, the feelings were understandable. Now, with the seemingly revived Theresa entering wholeheartedly into their love-making, he was left disoriented. It was still not like the old days, but it was intense and it was good. He started to feel even more guilt about being with Lee than he had the first time. The reasons that drove him to Lee did not seem to exist any longer, at least not the way things were in the summer. For about a week and a half, Vince was a two-woman man, connecting with Lee four times in the suite, and being bedded by Theresa four times at home. Though they were both expert at driving him out of the realm of conscious thought, he still had time to compare and contrast their bodies and their techniques. If forced to choose, his history with Theresa would certainly have tilted things in her favor. He refused to think about making a choice. With great difficulty, Theresa restrained herself from increasing the frequency of sex until Lee had left town. She knew from the PI that Vince and Lee had engaged in a send-off fuck before she had to go to the airport. That meant there was another fairly high-probability day lost. Unable to restrain herself any longer, Theresa woke Vince with a blow job the next morning, stopping before he unloaded. She let him take a piss, then practically dragged him on top of herself. Given the warm-up, the convincing was not that hard, and she got her first possible scoring shot. Uncharacteristically, she told him to get his own breakfast afterward. She wanted to stay prone to maximize the swimmers' chances of connecting. When he left, she even elevated her bottom with a pillow. She suspected that tactic was an old wives' tale, but she was taking no chances. She took getting pregnant on her first month off the pills as a given. It had happened with both Julie and Terry, and she refused to consider that age would have reduced her fecundity. That evening, she could hardly restrain herself from seducing him again, but she had decided that only on the three most probable days should she try for doubles. Unfortunately, on one of those days, Lee returned. She feared he would beg off that morning. The whole time Lee was gone, Theresa did everything in her power to arouse Vince. It was not always with the intention of getting a load right then, just to keep him primed and break down his resistance. She went so far as buying some racy lingerie that was beyond anything she had worn before. She hardly wore regular clothes during that time, and spent a highly unusual amount of time naked. Whenever possible, her hands were on him, as often as possible on his crotch. By sheer determination, she was able to get five injections from him while Lee was gone. Her biggest victory was scoring on the morning of Lee's return. She could not resist a little private gloating over her competitor's probable frustration at Vince's exhaustion. ------- "What kind of welcome home is that, anyway?" Lee demanded late the afternoon of her return. "One puny little squirt is not what I was looking forward to. That's not why I signed you on, Stud. Has Theresa gotten back in the game?" "Yeah, she's been like a maniac the last few days. I couldn't keep her off of me." "And I'll bet you really tried, didn't you?" Lee asked sarcastically. "Well, what was I supposed to do?" he pled. "If I turned her down, she might get suspicious." "I guess," she admitted. "Well, I'm getting that thing back up whether it wants to or not. Even if you're empty, you're going to pound me with it for a while. Any objections?" When Vince practically oozed through the doorway at home later, totally wasted, it was all Theresa could do keep a straight face and make some sympathetic comment. Her amusement was tempered by fear that she might not get another shot of sperm from him in that month's ovulation period. Women often claim they know when they have 'taken', and after that very morning's session, Theresa had that feeling. Her longed-for conception was too important to take any chances with, so she wanted another chance or two. If she didn't get them, though, she was pretty sure the deed was done. The following morning, Vince literally snuck out, much earlier than his usual time. When he reached the office, his message light was flashing, and it was from Lee: "Call me ASAP." When he called her, she just said "Coffee shop - NOW!" "I think we have a problem with Theresa," she said before they were hardly seated. That started Vince's day off in a less than ideal way. "One of two things has happened: either she knows about us and is trying to win you back, OR..." here, she stopped and looked hard at Vince, "she is trying to get pregnant." Lee had wisely waited until Vince had swallowed the coffee in his mouth. Still the cup was in his hand, raised off of the table. His hand shook so badly the coffee spilled out of the cup. "When was her last period?" Lee asked. When he told her, her shoulders slumped. "In a way," she said softly, "I hope she is trying for a baby. When I said I did not want to be a home-wrecker, I meant it. Believe me, it's the last thing I want, but we had better stop getting together until this gets sorted out. Damn! At least you've got Theresa, and she seems to be a lot more interested. I've got shit!" "Do you regret the divorce?" he asked. "I always did," she assured him. "A steady predictable source is important, even if it's not enough. Besides, I honestly loved him. When he found out about the others, I could not convince him of that, but it's true. Yeah, right now, I'm very sorry about the divorce. Let's give it until her next period, at least, then we'll decide if it's safe to continue." Vince used that day to just recover, but the next night, he initiated sex. It was the first time he had done so, and Theresa, her instincts now in full play, immediately deduced that Lee had cut him off. It was an alarming insight until she stopped to think about it. The whole key was whether or not she had conceived. If she had, nothing else mattered. She had the goods for a favorable divorce on grounds of adultery. If, however, she was not pregnant, and if Vince and Lee had figured out that she was trying... That was the worst case scenario. It was doubtful that Vince would look favorably on her having another child.' ------- After the unbelievable first day, school for Terry was quite uneventful. Apparently, everyone knew of his arrest and incarceration, but surprisingly, it made him more of a celebrity than an outcast. His old friends did not shun him, and that helped a lot. One problem he encountered was with the three former sex partners that were still in school. When they saw how he had filled out and hardened, they were more than anxious to resume their activity with him. He had not thought about it beforehand, but it just did not interest him any longer. There was still no acknowledged romance between him and Ellie, but he could not deny how he felt about her. He could not be 'unfaithful'. Ellie had two things to deal with, neither of them really a problem. First of all, her new look was accomplishing just what Glen had said it would. Boys who before hardly spoke to her now started to hover. She even had several invitations for dates, which she graciously declined. The other situation was with her close friends and teammates. They instantly noticed a whole different look and attitude about her, easily identifiable as the glow of a woman in love. When word got out that Terry was living with them, she became the envy of the whole female population. From there it was a short leap to Terry being the source of her glow. It was flattering, but also very frustrating to Ellie, she so desperately wanted their assumptions to be true. ------- It was well into October, work on the basement apartment was nearing completion, and Glen and Julie would be able to move down there soon. That impending event spurred Ellie to action. Betty was a little surprised to see Ellie in the bathroom so late, as she happened to walk by. In the usual family fashion, the door was ajar unless someone was actually using the toilet or the shower. Ellie was at the counter, painstakingly applying makeup. "Got a late night date?" Betty asked as she leaned on the jamb as nonchalantly as she could. Ellie wore a baby doll that Betty had forgotten she owned. As she stretched up to work on an eye, Betty could see that she had a thong on underneath the top. "Can't take it any more, huh?" Betty asked, trying not to sound flip or sarcastic. "I wasn't trying to sneak anything by you, Mom." "I know, I know. I've been expecting this for a while. I'm actually surprised you waited this long. Got a plan?" "I've got to know how he feels about me, Mom. It's driving me crazy. And you're being such a poop about it." This last was said with a grin. "Sorry, but not really," Betty quipped. She had continued to refuse to reveal any of Terry's comments to her about Ellie. "I think I've figured out what's going on," Ellie said, pausing from her primping. "I think he likes me, but he's protecting me from himself. He sees himself as this awful messed up guy who might ruin any girl he gets close to. That's bullshit, and I'm going to stop it." "And if you find out he isn't in love with you?" A fearful looked crossed Ellie's face briefly, but then she said "Then I'll just get started getting over it. God, it would be hard, though!" "Got it bad, huh?" "For sure." After a pause, Ellie asked "Aren't you going to tell me I'm too young?" "Hell, no. I was a goner for your Dad at your age. What could I say?" She walked up to her daughter and gave her a hug, then a soft kiss on the cheek, being careful not to damage the makeup. Always preferring to end things on a light note, she quipped "An awful lot of work for a dark bedroom, don't you think?" "Oh, Mom!" Ellie was apparently not ready for the discussion to end. "No orders not to have sex?" "When was the last time I ordered you to do anything? Nope. You've been on the pill long enough. I know that if he doesn't convince you he loves you, you won't do it." "Damn, Mom, you're going to make me cry and mess this stuff up!" "Well, I happen to think your bare face doesn't need any help at all." "God! Flip said almost the same thing that one night... well, you know." "Must be true, then," Betty stated. "Terry sees you all the time at the pool with no makeup. Think that turns him off?" Ellie dropped her hands to her sides and stared into the mirror. "Shit! I just wasted twenty minutes. But you're right." She quickly washed her face free of the makeup. Then, she dramatically squared her shoulders and said. "Outta my way, Mom. I'm about to land me my man!" Ellie had misjudged her timing a little, for Terry's room was dark. She walked in anyway, switched on his small bedside lamp, and quickly crawled under the covers with him. Terry was on the near edge of sleep, and just the soft sound of her walking into the room was enough to pull him fully awake. He was turning to see who it was just as she got in bed. She took full advantage and pressed her body against his, front to front. "Ellie, I don't think..." "I think... you think... too much," she told him in slow, drawn-out words. She punctuated her words with a brief but firm kiss on the lips. "But we aren't... we've never..." "Don't I know it! That's why I'm here, Terry. I can't go on like this." "What do you mean? We do lot's of things together. I thought you liked being with me. I sure like it!" "I love being with you. But we're not doing the things together that I really want to do." Ellie reached her hand down and grasped his cock, delighted to find it steel hard. "I hope that is because it's me here, and not just some scantily clad girl." "No, I..." he could not think how to finish that sentence. She released his cock and brought both hands up to cradle his face. "Terry, I'm just going to say it. I'm so in love with you I can't stand it. How do you feel about me?" "Ellie, you shouldn't be involved with me. I've got too many..." "I don't want to know about your problems. I want to know if you're in love with me!" "You don't understand, I'm not good for you. I..." "Dammit, Terry! You think you've got to protect me from your screwed-up self or I might get hurt, right?" "Yeah, I don't want..." "So you're out fighting all these demons all by yourself, making sure poor, delicate little Ellie doesn't get hurt in the crossfire, right?" "Well, I..." "In case you haven't noticed, Ellie isn't little, and she's sure as Hell is not delicate. Terry, I want to fight those demons with you. I want to be part of you. But I have to know if you want me that way." "Oh, Ellie, I'm worried that..." "I'm not worried. I can take anything. Except this... this limbo we're in. Will you please either tell me you're in love with me or kick me out of this bed?" "Ellie?" he asked in a timid voice. "What?" she answered, much more harshly than she intended. "Will you let me finish the next answer?" "Ohhhh!" she exclaimed, ducking her head in embarrassment. He kissed her on the forehead and chuckled to show that he wasn't upset. Then, he mimicked her gesture and words, holding her face in both hands. "Honey, I'm so in love with you I can hardly stand it." She gave a low moan, and tears sprang to her eyes. She could not say anything, but she could kiss him, and she did, intensely. After the kiss, she asked in a very soft voice, "Is that like 'spend the rest of your life with me' in love." "It's exactly like that," he assured her. Then, with more than a little fear, she pushed harder. "And it doesn't bother you that I'm so big?" "Bother? It bothers the Hell out of me. Haven't you noticed all the hardons I get when I'm around you?" "Really? You think I'm sexy - not big and gawky?" "Honey, your Mom and I had a talk once. I told her I would love waking up to someone just like her every morning twenty years from now. And you're just like her." Instead of saying anything, she pulled away from him, leaving him very puzzled. When she stood beside the bed and stripped off her few garments, puzzlement gave way to awe. "Do I look enough like Mom to wake up to," she asked. "I think you could make her jealous," he said, drinking in the generous curves, the lustrous, smooth skin, and the megawatt smile. "Do you have any idea how hard it has been for me at the pool? Especially when both of you were there?" "About as hard as that, I bet," she giggled, as she pointed at his cock. She had left it exposed and sticking out of his shorts when she threw back the covers to get out of bed. "You're overdressed, now." "Aren't you afraid things will get out of hand if we're naked together?" he asked. "I'm more afraid that they won't," she replied as she got back in bed and pulled his shorts off. She hugged him tightly. He pulled back reflexively when he felt his cock pressing against her, but she was having none of that. She dropped one hand down to his ass and forced his cock right into her belly. "Ellie, we're talking about making love and being together forever. But we haven't even kissed before. Are you sure we're not going too fast? I don't want to rush you into anything." "Rush ME?! I was the one who had to get you to commit, remember? Are you having second thoughts?" "No! No! Not at all. It's just that..." "I know. You're being careful with my feelings, and I love you for that. But my feelings were set from the first day. You could have had me that night, and I would never have had a doubt." "Then I'm sorry I worried so much about hurting you," he told her with a kiss to emphasize it. "Oh, it wasn't all bad. We got to be wonderful friends. Mom and Dad are like that, and that's how I want us to be." He was silent for a moment, but then she heard a ragged catch in his breath. "Ohhh, I'm so sorry you have so many painful memories. I want to help you get over them, really." She pulled his head onto her shoulder, and despite his best intentions to be strong and stoic, he lost it. For several minutes, he sobbed uncontrollably. "Some stud I turned out to be, huh?" he quipped when he had his breathing under control. "First time in bed with the girl of my dreams, and do I send her into ecstasy? No, I bawl all over her shoulder!" "Hey, I'm honored that you will let me know how you feel. You've been working awfully hard to keep it hidden, you know. I don't want to be shut out of anything." "I... I've never had anyone this close before, Ellie. I'm probably going to do some stupid stuff." "That's OK. I'll get you straightened out." They giggled together, then fell into a long, hot kiss. When they broke the kiss, she panted out "I'm on the pill, and I'm sooo ready!" "But we haven't even been on a date," he pointed out. "Everything since you first walked into this house has been foreplay," she told him as she tried to wriggle her way inside of him." They locked in another long kiss, then he told her "Ellie, I have to tell you - you won't be my first." Without a pause, she shot back "Can I be your last?" "Oh, God yes!" it was his turn to moan. "Then make me a woman. Right now! Your woman!" "Is... is this your first time?" "Yup! You're going to be my one and only, just like Mom." "I don't want to hurt you." "I'm a jock, remember? Somewhere in all those games, I broke it." She decided no more explanation was needed and reached for his cock, which had been almost burning her belly with the heat of his arousal. She gave it a couple of strokes, then grabbed the shorts she had taken off of him and started stroking seriously. "I think I'll know when you're close, but tell me, just in case, OK?" She mentally thanked her brother for that one sweet night that allowed her not to seem like a total innocent as she caressed him. Those were the last words for a while. He seemed about to protest that he should be returning the favor, but she quickly usurped his mouth for another purpose. It did not take long for him to deposit a nearly overflowing load into the wadded up shorts. She held them wrapped around him as the pulses gradually came to a stop. His recovery from the intense orgasm was a priceless experience. As he struggled to regain his breath, she pulled his face between her full, firm breasts and cradled it there, kissing the top of his head. While she cuddled him, one hand was busy caressing and exploring every part of him that she could reach. Form the first, he had loved being with her. She always made him feel good. But now! The love and affection that had been held back before poured out of her in a flood. Bless all the stupid guys who could not see past her size and strength to the loving, passionate woman inside. She was a treasure - his treasure! Terry's other girls had been a refuge, a source of comfort. They had been wonderful, faithful friends and companions, but there was never a sense of belonging. He knew from a very young age that he did not belong in his home, with his parents. In his whole life, the only true sense of belonging he had experienced was with Julie, and he always knew she would have her own life. With his face lovingly cradled on her breast, that huge missing part of his life was suddenly found. He knew without a doubt that he finally belonged somewhere - with someone. It didn't matter that he was just a guest in someone else's house. It didn't matter that they were still in high school. Even his poverty and his soiled record did not matter. He had found what he envied in Betty and Alan, and in some of his friends' parents. He had found his soulmate, and he belonged to her and with her. There was no miraculous disappearance of his anger at his parents, or at the legal system, or at the school administration. But it was no longer him against all of that. He believed her when she said she wanted to help carry his load, and he felt the strength she could give him. Even before the physical consummation of their union, he felt as tightly bound to her as two humans could be. The physical consummation began when he could breath normally. "Will it take long to get hard again?" she asked as she fondled his limp member. "Just long enough for me to worship these," he told her as he rolled her onto her back and took a distended nipple in his mouth..."and this," he added as he slid his hand over her belly, down into her pubic thatch. The suddenness of his attention to her nipple made her squeak and jerk a little. Fearful that he had hurt her, he started to pull his face away, but her athlete's reflexes had his head clamped firmly back where she wanted it before his lips had barely released the nipple. He knew she was anxious to have him inside of her, but he was determined that she have at least one orgasm first. His other girls had liked sex, but he had to learn to bring their arousal up before they could enter into it fully. Thus, it was just his way to take care of the girl first, and he took pride in it. Knowing she was almost totally inexperienced, he was amazed and thrilled at the way she responded to his touch. There was no virginal timidity, no holding back. Everything she did signaled want, willingness, eagerness. She spread her legs as soon as she sensed where his hand was going. As his fingers touched her pussy, she arched up off of the bed, thrusting her pelvis at him for more contact. She was not just eager, she was frantic. Without any words, Ellie was telling him unmistakably: 'this is what my whole life has been pointing toward, and you are the one. I'm complete now because I'm part of you'. With one of the girls, he had experimented with oral. He thought it could be very exciting with the right partner, but he did not consider himself good at it. He would leave that until later. There was no fear that his fingers would be insufficient to bring her to climax. From the first touch, she was squirming, writhing, whimpering, and moaning. Her body had been ready for sex for a long time, and was joyously celebrating its overdue fulfillment. How long it took for her to come, he could not have told. He was so totally absorbed by her awesome passion that time was unrecognizable. While she was still recovering from her extremity, he positioned himself to enter her, having hardened many minutes earlier. Though she seemed barely conscious after her exertions, she realized the time had come. Somehow mustering the dexterity despite her exhaustion, she again displayed her wholehearted commitment. Grasping his cock, she slid her bottom toward him, not waiting for him to move. One hand spread her lips to accept his head, and before he was even seated firmly, she began thrusting rhythmically against him. Her impetuosity could very well have led to a frustrating misfire, but with young lovers' luck, his glans popped past her opening. So far, he was so blown away by her abandonment that he had hardly moved. Once he felt the velvety embrace of her passage, instinct overrode his paralysis, and he began thrusting back at her. Despite the girls he had been with, Terry would not have been considered an accomplished lover. In a sense, that was good because neither would feel either inadequate or intimidated compared to the other. Even had he been more expert, it may not have made a difference right then. What drove them was elemental and instinctive. There was no thought about technique, they just needed contact, movement, and wonderful, wonderful stimulation. Lacking the pain of a newly-ruptured membrane, Ellie was left with nothing but a little discomfort at the initial stretching. The rest was all ecstasy. For Terry, the sensations were not new, but it had been many months, and there was a whole different level of pleasure. This was his Ellie. This was forever. There was no comparison with what went before. He came before she could make it, excited as she was. He took care of her with his hand again - three times. A little later, he entered her again and was able to hold out until she came. There was no experimenting, just simple, face-to-face intercourse, but it was more than enough. They had a whole lifetime to try other things. ------- Terry awoke shortly after dawn, probably at the sound of a toilet flushing upstairs. His first reaction was contentment as he felt Ellie pressed against him. In a moment, though, he felt some panic. He was a guest of the Vosses, and he had just slept with their daughter. He sat up rather quickly in bed, and that woke Ellie. She reached up to pull him back down, but he resisted. "Don't you think you should get back to your room before your folks find out you're here?" "This is where I belong from now on," she answered drowsily. "But I'm the one they'll be pissed at." "They won't. Mom knows. I wouldn't be here without telling her." "Yeah, I guess you wouldn't. You're sure she's OK? What about your Dad?" "Don't worry about them. Let's worry about this tenderness between my legs. I can only think of one treatment." Quite a while later, the young couple came up the stairs together, finding only her parents in the kitchen. He had given her a T-shirt to wear, considering her baby doll a bit too risque for public exposure. Both parents looked at the two and smiled, erasing any lingering concern on Terry's part. Feeling unusually loquacious, Terry said "Alan, I wish I was old enough to drink." "Oh? Why is that?" "The two of us should celebrate together. We're the two luckiest sonsabitches alive." As if Betty could have been any more thrilled with her future son-in-law. ------- Chapter 14 Late in October, the downstairs apartment was finished. Before Terry exchanged living spaces with Julie and Glen, Betty and Alan sat down with him and Ellie and talked about sleeping arrangements. They were understandably concerned with the two young lovers living pretty much as husband and wife. Fortunately, Ellie and Terry had talked about that subject, and they were all able to agree on when it was appropriate for the two to share a bed, and when it was not. With Terry a year older and determined to go to college, there was a guarantee of at least one year of separation. For Ellie, though, there was none of the fear of the separation that had driven Julie. She had a loving family to fall back on, plus the confidence that they would somehow end up at the same school. She was definitely good enough to be in line for a swimming scholarship. ------- On the day that Julie and Glen moved downstairs to the newly-finished apartment, Betty organized a little 'house-warming' party. It was held on a night when Glen did not have to work, and Julie did not have evening duty. Betty had put up a few streamers, and baked a caked. In a potentially dangerous move, she had called Theresa and invited her to attend. Theresa insisted she would bring a gift, and Betty decided to let it happen. Theresa was in agony over what gift to bring, and she obviously could not go to Vince for advice. On the one hand was her desire to do everything she could to help the struggling couple. On the other hand, she was well aware of their reluctance to accept help from her. She hoped those feelings had softened, but she worried about offending them. Her solution was a large set of very high quality towels. It was a thoughtful, usable gift, and most people underestimated how expensive linens were. At supper the night of the little party, Betty announced that dessert would be downstairs at seven to celebrate the move. Then, she quietly took Julie and Terry aside. "I took a chance, and I hope you won't be angry with me. I invited your mother over for our little celebration." Both siblings looked very surprised, but neither made a negative gesture or comment. "And Julie, I took an even bigger chance - when she asked if she could bring a gift, I told her she could." "Oooooh!" Julie exclaimed. "I... I... don't know..." "I'm aware of how you feel, Honey," Betty told her, "but I really don't think she's trying to buy your love. This is the kind of situation where a mother would typically give a gift. It wouldn't really hurt you to let her enjoy a little bit of normal motherliness, would it?" Julie didn't say anything, just gave Betty a hug. "How about you, Terry? Are you ready to be around her in a normal social situation?" Betty's sincerity made it tough for him to react negatively. "I'll by all right," he assured her. "Besides, if I act up, I'll have to answer to Ellie." That made them all laugh. Theresa seemed as nervous as the night she served dinner. In fact, everyone was tense as Betty escorted her downstairs. Ellie was the first to greet her, and she was towing Terry by the hand as she approached his mother. Julie had warned Glen about the present, and he reluctantly agreed to accept it. Theresa's choice turned out to be perfect, and Julie had to put aside her reluctance when she saw the quality. She also could not miss the relief on her mother's face at her acceptance. After everyone had enjoyed cake and had examined the guys' handiwork, the party was over. Theresa managed to get Julie and Terry together and told them "I have some serious things to tell the two of you. I know this is a party night and I don't want to spoil the mood. Is there some time soon I could talk to both of you?" "Will it take long?" Surprisingly, it was Terry who asked. "What I have to say won't take long," Theresa answered. "You may have some questions, but that's up to you." "Then let's talk now," he said. "Oh, sorry, Julie! I shouldn't speak for you." "No, I agree. Let's go in the bedroom." There were two chairs in the bedroom, and Theresa pointedly sat on the bed, motioning them to the chairs. When they were seated, she smiled briefly at them, took a big breath, then told them "I am divorcing your father." While they were still too stunned to react, she went on "I have evidence of an affair with a co-worker." "Mom, what..." Julie tried to ask. "Wait, Honey. There's more. Let me say it all, and it may answer some of your questions. The other news is that I'm pregnant, and it's on purpose. I should say I'm almost positive I'm pregnant." Both children gave audible gasps at that, but Theresa continued. "I want to have some more children, and I want to raise them right, without the terrible things we did to you two. I could forgive Vince for his affair, but he still does not think he did anything wrong in raising you. I would have had to divorce him even if I hadn't discovered the affair. With his attitude, there would be nothing but fighting over how to treat the children." Both children sat silently for nearly a minute after she stopped talking. "I... I could have a brother or sister younger than my child!" "And I'll have a child younger than my grandchild," Theresa said with a little chuckle. "But you're not certain yet?" Terry was finally able to ask. "Well, I missed my period, and EPT says so. The earliest the doctor can verify it is next week." "Uh, more than I wanted to know, I guess," Terry said with a blush. Julie was having great trouble digesting all of this. She hated what her home had been, but in some strange way, it was still the known, stable place in her past life. She just sat staring at her mother, unframeable questions racing across her expression. "I won't in any way minimize what we did to you two," Theresa told them, "but you need to know that we have turned our own lives upside down, too." Not ready to concede anything, Terry countered "But you said you got pregnant on purpose." "Yes, I did. But it was not something I would do if I had not ruined things with you. You see, being a mother was always the most important thing to me. I was just too arrogant and stupid to know how badly I was messing it up." She had to stop to dab at some tears. "I need to prove to myself that I can be a good mother - that I can raise children who will love me back." "Don't think I am doing this to punish myself," Theresa went on. "The thought of babies excites me, and I can't wait." "But... you're going to have to raise it alone. And you said babies. Without Dad, how will... ?" Julie had come out of her confusion enough to ask. "I don't have all those answers, Honey. I know it won't be easy, but I can do it. Money won't be a problem. Maybe I'll hire Vince for stud service for the next one." With that, she gave an all-out giggle. "Oh, I didn't mention it, but your father knows nothing about the divorce or the pregnancy. He doesn't think I know about the affair. I would like to keep this secret until I tell him. That will be right after the doctor verifies that I'm pregnant. I'll understand if you want to talk about it with the Vosses." The questions went on for a half-hour more. When they left the bedroom, Julie's and Terry's shock was apparent to their lovers. ------- Glen was not happy about the bombshell that Theresa had dropped on Julie. He had been planning on some energetic love-making to celebrate the new apartment. Ever since Theresa left, Julie had been distracted. As it was getting late, he decided he would just have to do his best to compete with the impact of the news. Since their little getaway at the cabin, a daily rubdown with anti-stretch-mark creme had become a treasured intimate ritual. Usually, Julie would get home from work and prepare for bed quickly. That way, Glen could do his thing before he went to work, and she could fall asleep contented with the attention. That night, he did not have to work, so he set up a more elaborate scenario. He showered quickly, drew her a bath, then undressed her, telling her that was the last she would see of her clothes until morning. She made the obligatory protests, but her face showed how pleased she was that her swelling body still held his interest. After she had soaked long enough to start feeling drowsy, he got her out, dried her, and brought her to a large towel spread on the bed. The anti-stretch rubdowns had rather quickly evolved into an application of lotion over her whole body. For the areas that were not vulnerable to stretch marks, he used a regular body lotion. As a rule, Glen would start with her feet as she lay on her back. He would raise each leg in the air as he worked the lotion in. At some point, he would spread her legs much wider than necessary and make sure she caught him leering at the sight of her exposed pussy. She would be obligated to raise an objection, but its impact would always be diminished by the wafting odor of her arousal. "That lucky kid of ours gets to crawl out of that gorgeous place," he quipped, pleased with the gooseflesh that instantly appeared on her skin. Over halfway through her term, Julie could no longer lie fully on her stomach, so he had devised some interesting positions for doing her back. That night, he straddled her as she lay on her side. Since he wore only a towel, he lowered himself so his genitals rested on her hip as he rubbed. Not pretending to be aloof, she used her hand to make sure most of his cock was pointing too far upward to rest on her hip. One of Glen's pleasures that was lost for a while was putting lotion on her bottom. Oh, he still put the lotion on, but it was not the same as when she lay on her stomach. When she laid that way, it thrust up in such an enticing way. He sometimes was so enthralled with it that she had to jar him from his reverie. "When you're done playing, I'd like lotion on some other spots, too," she had teased one night. When putting creme on her breasts and belly, Glen never made any pretense of just fighting stretchmarks. He took a very long time, especially on the nipples, where the marks would never show. While doing her belly, he would plant kisses all over as he rubbed and say affectionate words to the baby. The ultrasound to determine the baby's sex was a luxury expense they had decided to avoid. Thus, they played the time-honored guessing game, bombarded by advice about sure-fire clues from every mother she encountered. Glen always ended the session by dramatically applying creme to her crotch. She always made some comment - "How many times have I told you I can't get stretch marks there?" In a fairly standard comeback, he said "But that will have to stretch more than any place else." Since there was no time pressure that night, he went on "In fact, it's so tight there... here, let me show you what I mean." Missionary position was becoming less common for them as she grew, but it seemed appropriate for the occasion. Tossing away his towel, he knelt in place and started working his way into her, keeping his torso upright enough so there was no pressure on her belly. All the while he kept up chatter about how tight the opening was, and how much it would have to stretch. Julie did not try to answer back, but just hissed, moaned, and whimpered out her pleasure. The second trimester had been a good time for Julie. Any nausea had gone and her energy was high. Also high was her libido. If she had her way, she would get it from Glen both going to and coming from work. Most times, she took pity on his weariness, but there were very few days that they did not make love. When both were satisfied, they visited the bathroom together to clean up, then got into bed. Whenever they could sleep together, they had always spooned, with his arm over her. Lately, he had begun resting his hand on her belly and caressing very lightly. Sometimes, he would hear her fall asleep and stop the caresses. Other times, he would stop because he fell asleep. Either way, it was one of the most thrilling events for Julie. The natural, instinctive way he did it told her that he truly loved her and the baby she carried. It was reassurance she very much needed. After the incredible disclosures from Theresa, however, sleep was not imminent for Julie, and she started talking. For almost an hour, they discussed her parents, her feelings about them, and her relationship to her mother. In a tone of almost frustration, she told him "She keeps doing things that are so not her, I mean the way she was before. Tonight, it was hard to even think of her as the mother I ran away from." "Is it getting harder to hate her?" "You know, I always thought she was equal with Dad, and they were both at fault. I'm starting to wonder if maybe she wasn't kind of a victim just like I was. Maybe he sucked her into the fighting the way they did me." "Hmmmm. Maybe. But what about all the other controlling things she did?" "Yeah. You're right. He couldn't make her do that," she mused. "But WOW! My mother and me pregnant at the same time!" ------- Upstairs in Glen's old room, a similar conversation was going on. Even though it was a school night, Ellie had permission to sleep with Terry because of the upsetting news he had received. For whatever reason, he had taken the news harder than had Julie. For the rest of the evening, he seemed to be in a fog. The strange relationship between him and his mother had been weighing on his mind more than he would admit. In bed, they talked for quite a while. In the middle, Ellie took over and made love to him, but the talk continued afterward. She had been consistently urging him to make peace with his mother and forgive her. He, however, was still a long way from being able to do that. When she had first used nudity to get to see him, he had wondered who that woman was. Just like Julie, he could not relate her to the mother he had always known. Tonight had totally disoriented him. He had heard Theresa say that she understood what she had done wrong. Every time they were together, she apologized multiple times. She had wanted to continue being naked, saying it showed how worthless she felt, and she hoped it would convince him of her sincerity. That was more than he could handle, despite how he felt about her. Now, she was willingly discarding her old life, and it was very hard to doubt her previous statements any more. He had to fight back thoughts of her being courageous and principled. That was not the kind of person you could hate. ------- On Halloween day, Vince's boss called him into the office. He told him that his appointment to VP would be voted on at the next board meeting, and that he was a shoo-in. The product extensions that he and Lee had worked on so hard were proving to be extremely popular, and he was being rewarded. At a high point such as that, a man wants a woman to share the joy with. Vince wanted to go and drag Lee to the suite and unleash his pent-up excitement. She, however, had refused to be with him since suspicion was raised about Theresa finding out. Fortunately, he felt he could celebrate with Theresa once again. Since her sexual 'binge' back in September, the sex had been good, if not as frequent as he would like. The serenity that he had observed in her when he came back from the trip with Lee was still evident. Nothing had changed with the children, as far as he knew, but she seemed quite happy and content. Her unwillingness to fight and her generally more placid demeanor were very disorienting to him. Yet, he had thought it through many times, and had decided he could live with the situation as it was. He wished for the old sex with his wife, or the short fling with Lee, but what he had should be enough for any man. Now, he would have more money, and an even more rewarding career. Hardly a day went by without something reminding him of the kids and their departure. Theresa no longer brought up the subject, but there were many other reminders. He had often wondered if she was seeing them, besides the one time he knew about when she broke down. His pride, however, would not allow him to make that inquiry. He was the one who had said they needed to forget the children and go on with their lives. He had to stick with it. Unbeknownst to Vince, Theresa had received verification of her pregnancy from the doctor that same day, and had gone immediately to the attorney's office, evidence in hand. The divorce papers were drawn up, waiting for her instructions as to delivery. As resolute as she was about her new family, the actual breakup with Vince was something Theresa had been dreading. Many times, she had decided to just tell him about the baby and give him a chance to reform. Every time, though, he would do something that would convince her that reform could never happen. If he would show any sign of interest in the children: if he would even ask about them, she would probably forget the divorce. When Vince called to ask her to dinner out, it caught her totally off-guard. She had spent hours working out just how she was going to give him the news. Over dinner at a nice restaurant was definitely not the right place. The news Vince gave her at dinner really complicated Theresa's plan. It was rare for him to show so much excitement and enthusiasm about work. He generally approached everything about his job with cool professional detachment, even when telling her about it. She did not want to inflict any more pain on him than was necessary, and throwing cold water on what was the high point of his career would certainly inflict pain. The board meeting on his appointment was in three days, so she decided to wait a week and a half before telling him. It would give him a little time to bask in the congratulations before she lowered the boom. After coming home from the celebration dinner, they had the most energetic sex since the blow-up with Julie. In the middle of it, Theresa found herself wondering how she could be so calculating, entering into love-making as if nothing was wrong while knowing it was one of their last times. In the afterglow, she decided to give Vince every possible chance to show some sign of interest in the children or regret for his part in driving them away. At every opportunity, she fed him bits of information about them, first of all revealing that she was seeing both of them regularly. Vince had developed a particular blank look that he used whenever the subject of the children came up. That look, with a couple of exceptions, greeted every comment she made about them, with never a word of response. One exception was when she told of going to the 'house-warming'. That drove Vince into an old-fashioned tirade, excoriating the children for moving out, the Vosses for 'harboring' them, and Theresa herself for 'fraternizing' with them. The tentative hopes she had held for him reforming were doused by that tantrum. The last remaining sympathy was erased when she gently asked if he had thought any more about his part in driving the kids away. His response to that made the earlier tirade seem like a prayer. It was the old Vince frenzy in vintage style. The fact that she just sat and listened made no difference at all. He did her a very large favor with his outbursts. He validated all of the reasons she was taking the drastic step and wiped out any hope that he might reform. ------- On the day she had decided to strike, Theresa had made herself up, dressed nicely, and prepared a cocktail for Vince's arrival. As soon as he came in the door, she handed him the drink and asked him to come into the living room. A little wary because of the unusual request, he nevertheless followed her. Once he was seated and the drink was safely on the table, she just came right out and said it. "Vince, I'm divorcing you. The papers will be delivered to your office tomorrow." "Whaaaa... what do you mean? Divorce? That's crazy! We've had a rough go, but divorce? I thought things were getting better!" "Vince, the grounds are adultery." "Adultery? But... !" He just sat and stared at her for the longest time. Then seeming to rouse himself he told her "That's over! It was only a few times, and it didn't mean anything." "It meant I will get a much better settlement. That's something, don't you think?" She had vowed not to be biting and sarcastic, but she couldn't resist at that point. "Do you mean you would throw away everything over one slip-up?" he demanded. "You threw Terry away after one slip-up." "But that was DRUGS!" he shouted. "And this is ADULTERY," she countered evenly, but mimicked his tone. "But... but it was just a few times, and it's stopped," he stammered, panic starting to rise. "And Terry only took a few pills, and isn't using any more," she came back. "Is this really about adultery, or is it back to that shit about driving the kids away?" he yelled, now worked almost to full cry. He was on his feet, gesturing wildly. "Sit down and I will answer you," she told him. He stared at her, almost vibrating with fury, and seemed to dance from foot to foot for a few seconds. Then, he grabbed the drink and slammed it in one gulp before collapsing into the chair. "Adultery is the official reason, but it's really about family. Vince, I'm pregnant. I am going to have more children and raise them without the mistakes we made before. I can't do that with you, so the only solution is divorce." "Pregnant? At your age? Are you crazy? You want to go through all of that again? What... ?!" He was on his feet again, but he ran out of words and started pacing around the room. Just like with Julie's pregnancy, she could feel him struggling to get control of the situation. Just like then, it was not going to happen. After a couple of minutes of pacing, he turned to her and said. "Don't do this, Theresa. I'll help you raise another child. It will be different this time." "Oh, does that mean you're ready to go to counseling?" she asked. It was a spur of the moment question, something she had not planned on. She instantly upbraided herself for deviating from her strategy, but had to admit to herself that really breaking off with him was something she wished she could avoid. Was there a chance? If someone had written a script for Vince to use to make things easier for Theresa, they could not have improved much on what happened. He obviously had the same old pathological dread of counseling, and took off on a tirade lasting several minutes. In the midst of it, she was able to muse that it was the last one she would ever sit through. "It won't be any different, Vince," she told him when he wound down. "I've tried hard to get you to show that something has changed, but it hasn't. You would try to do the same things as before. I would try to stop you, and our lives would be Hell. Vince, we are barely coexisting now. With a child, it would be terrible around here. I would not let you do what we did before." "Then get rid of the baby. Let's try to fix our marriage." "Do you really think we could fix it without help?" she asked. He just stared at her, first in anger, then with a look of resignation. "I need the baby, Vince. I have to prove I can raise happy children who love me. My life will be a failure if I don't. No, I'm going to have the baby, and one or two more, I hope." "But if we divorce... how will you have more?" "Other men have sperm, Vince. Or I could invite you back for stud service. You're good at it." Once again, she allowed some unplanned sarcasm to seep in. At long last, she had shocked him into silence. There was no further blow-up, no more shouting, no profanity. He did not even speak as he walked dejectedly from the house. Theresa did not feel like eating anything, and she just sat quietly in the living room for an indeterminate time. When the doorbell rang, she was puzzled. He would not have needed to ring the bell. Who could it be? When she opened the door, she saw a very frazzled-looking Lee standing there. "Theresa, please don't do this to Vince," Lee said as she walked into the living room. "I'm begging you to forgive him - and me. Stop the divorce and give him a chance to make it right." "Look," Lee went on, "we were two people who were desperate. We scored a big business victory, and felt like celebrating, and..." "And you'd been waiting for years to get in his pants and that was the perfect chance," Theresa cut her off. "Why did you stop? Wasn't he good enough?" She said it very gently. The words themselves were sharp enough. Sensing that this was not going at all well, Lee held her face in her hands before answering. "When you were trying to get pregnant, Vince told me how you always wanted sex. I thought maybe you knew and were trying to win him back. I told him we had to cool it." "Well, I should thank you for that," Theresa said. "I didn't think you would try to steal him from me, but since your divorce, I wasn't sure." "Honestly, I don't want to marry him - never did. My divorce showed me that I am not good at marriage. With Vince it was just for sex. I need a lot." "I guess that argument didn't work with Roland, huh?" Lee gave her an angry look, then her shoulders sagged. "I guess sex has gotten me in trouble twice." "Lee, if it's any consolation, I forgive Vince. I know I wasn't giving him what he needed. I forgive you, too." "Then you'll stop the divorce?" Lee asked, hope creeping into her voice. "Honestly, Theresa, I will keep my hands off of him, just like before. He's a good friend, but I consider you my friend, too. I won't try to break you guys up." "No, the adultery charge is very handy. I assume he told you the real reason." "No, he didn't." Theresa then explained her reasons, while Lee went through surprise after surprise. "But... but your kids were always so well-behaved!" Lee sputtered at one point. "They did that to survive around us, then got out of the house as much as they could." "And Vince doesn't think he did anything wrong? He doesn't realize that the fighting and things caused them to leave?" Lee asked. "No. It sounds like you believe me." "Well, it's obvious something has been wrong for eight or nine months," Lee explained. "And there's no question about his controlling personality. The shouting and fighting part is hard to believe, though. I have never seen him even a little out of control, except when... uh..." Lee's voice trailed off in obvious embarrassment. "Yes. Then, too," Theresa added, almost wistfully. "I assume your disagreement over the kids made you cut him off," Lee stated. "Yes, that and the fact that I was so upset and depressed I couldn't think of sex most of the time." "So... so you planned to get pregnant, then divorce him, no matter what?" When Theresa nodded, Lee went on. "When did you find out about... us?" "I think I knew the first night he came home." "What gave him away?" "I guess he's just not very good at cheating," Theresa said with a giggle. She explained the things that had tipped her off. "After my initial shock and dismay, I figured out that it worked out perfectly for me." "That's calculating and heartless!" Lee sputtered. "Worthy of you, huh?" Theresa shot back. That earned her a momentary hateful stare followed by a little sad grin. "I am truly sorry about the timing," Theresa added, "what with the promotion and all. I had no control over that." "Isn't there any way you will take him back?" Lee asked. "If he would change his attitude about the children, I would. Honestly, I don't want to divorce him. But you have to understand: I have to get over what we did to our children to drive them away. I can only do that by having more. I don't see any way Vince will accept that. He just said so." "Lee, will you take him back, please?" Theresa went on. "He needs it badly right now. Nothing will stop the divorce, so there's no reason to hold back. I don't hate him, and I wish him some comfort. I can't raise children with him, but I don't want to see him suffer any more than necessary." "I think, for your sake," Theresa continued, "you should not bring up the subject of the children, at all. If you want an ongoing relationship with him, you need to be 'safe', with nothing linking you with past pain." That statement triggered several more minutes of discussion before neither woman could think of anything more to say. Lee was not used to leaving any encounter in defeat, so she was not happy when she left. Still, it was not a total defeat. Vince was now fair game. ------- Lee rose greatly in Theresa's estimation over the next several days. She took Vince in, coming back to get a suitcase of clothes and essentials for him. She apologized repeatedly to Theresa for breaking up her marriage, until she was finally convinced that it would have happened anyway. It was Wednesday night when Theresa told him, and he was unable to work the rest of the week. The papers were delivered to Lee's house. Her help was not even rewarded with sex, for he was totally impotent for nearly a week. With adultery as the grounds, and the indisputable evidence from the PI, the divorce moved rapidly and was signed within three weeks. She did not ask for nearly as much as she could have, given the grounds. With his increased salary, she was able to ensure herself and the baby a good living without seriously hampering him. Theresa took the house, with plans to sell it soon. That news had a strangely upsetting effect on Julie. It was the last piece of home. As bad as things were there, it was still a huge part of her past. The most unique features of the settlement were some trust accounts. One was a large trust set up in Julie's name. The sealed terms of the trust stipulated that the funds would be paid to Julie if Vince was ever proven to have mentioned the possibility of her getting pregnant on purpose. After ten years, the money would revert back to Vince. The other accounts provided funds for college expenses for Julie, Terry, and Glen. Vince went completely ballistic when that demand was first presented, and for several days, it looked like the settlement would have to end up before a judge because Theresa was not about to back off. College funds created at birth were already in Julie's and Terry's names, but legally, the money still belonged to the parents. Glen's fund would be made up partly from funds drawn from the other two. Vince interpreted the funds as an admission of guilt, and he was not about to admit to anything. Everything went through the lawyers, since he had already refused any future direct contact with her. Theresa saw the college money as a small apology for what they had stolen of the young people's futures. Finally, with considerable input from Lee, the lawyer persuaded Vince that going before a judge with provable adultery was not a wise move in that state for a man of his means. Theresa knew that the college assistance would be refused by all of the children, at least at first. She was hopeful that a little distance would allow them to accept it. Those trusts also expired in ten years, with unused money going equally to Theresa and Vince. Terry felt perverse pleasure in the agony his father must have been suffering. Theresa had replayed some of the conversations for him. While he could not stop his attitude toward his mother from changing, knowing that Vince was totally unrepentant gave him a satisfactory target for continued hatred. ------- The signing of the divorce agreement hit Theresa much harder than she had expected it would, although no one can accurately anticipate the impact of such a once-in-a-lifetime event. The worst immediate reaction was a strong sense of loneliness. Julia picked it up quickly and took a chance by pleading with Julie to spend as much time with her mother as she could. Julie's heart was definitely changing after the divorce. It was impossible to downplay her mother's regret and repentance after that drastic move, along with the pregnancy. More and more, she was seeing Theresa as a fellow victim, rather than one of the tormentors. Glen was actually less willing to forgive Theresa. He had been very strong on Julie establishing a relationship with her mother, and still was. With the increasing closeness, though, he had a definite feeling of 'That's not what I meant!' There was no denying that the improved relationship with her mother was good for Julie, and that helped to moderate Glen's attitude. When Julia asked Julie to spend even more time with Theresa, Glen was concerned that it would have the wrong effect, but he was willing to admit his own error when Julie's spirits improved. Part of the reason the increased closeness between mother and daughter worked was that Theresa came to Julie. Betty issued her an open invitation, after consulting with Julie and Terry. Trying not to abuse it, Theresa spent every hour she dared at the Voss home. One of the effects of Theresa's loneliness was to make her think more of her family back home. She had always talked frequently to her mother, and to a lesser extent, her two sisters. While not as close, she had always been on good terms with her father and brothers, as well. Vince, Theresa, and the kids had usually made a visit 'home' at least twice a year. It was a source of great shame to Theresa that they had withheld any news of problems with the children, starting with Terry's arrest. Now, she had truly blockbuster information, and she knew she would have to tell it. Despite their problems with Vince and Theresa, Julie and Terry had gotten along very well with both sets of grandparents. There was no way they could be kept permanently in the dark about the destruction of the family. Although she dreaded the telling, Theresa felt a need to have her family know. She instinctively longed for the support she knew she would get from her mother and her sisters. After agonizing for two days over whether she should even ask, Theresa told Julie she was going to see her mother, and wondered if she could possibly go along. Julie was immediately negative, but as they talked, she felt some of the same desire for family support that had been drawing Theresa. Her grandmother and one of her aunts had been extremely good to Julie. She also feared telling them the story, but agreed that it had to be done. The biggest problem, as far as Julie was concerned, was money; money for plane fare, and lost time at work. When Theresa said she would pay, Julie reacted negatively, as usual. That seemed to be the end of the discussion. Later, when telling Glen about the conversation, he managed to surprise her totally. "Is there any way I could go with you?" "What? But... why... ?" "It will be really tough to go in there and tell them what happened. If they could see that I'm hopelessly in love with you, maybe it would help." "But... your work... school... tickets are expensive..." she knew she was babbling, but could not help herself. "Honey, for once, I think we should ask your mother to pay." "What!!?" "This has nothing to do with trying to make up for the past. If she'll pay, let's go with her. We'll work out the days so we don't miss much. It will have to be short, maybe just one night." When Julie had recovered enough to do anything, she called Theresa, and within a couple of hours, a quick midweek trip was all set up. At least it was quick for Julie and Glen, who would stay only one night. Theresa arranged to stay a few more days. ------- The few days before the trip and the flight itself were very hard on Julie. Glen's unbelievably loving gesture left her almost reeling with emotion, but unfortunately, part of the feeling was the old familiar guilt. Since their getaway at the cabin, he had been doing his best to smother her with love and tenderness. She knew part of it was because he felt guilty himself, but she could tell the genuine love behind his attentions. She wondered if the guilt would ever stop clouding all of the good things that happened to her. Would it ever go away? Or would she someday have to tell Glen? Would that be the end of them as a couple? Having her mother's family find out about her pregnancy was enough stress by itself, but it made the remorse worse than it had been for some time. Only Theresa's mother and father and one sister could get together for the visit. Fortunately, it was the aunt to whom Julie was closest. Theresa had thought telling Vince about the divorce was hard, but telling all to her family had her almost paralyzed. In an unprecedented show of warmth and support, Julie took her mother's hand as they entered the living room of Theresa's parents' home and sat on the sofa. With a gesture of her eyes, Julie indicated for Glen to sit on the other side of Theresa. He did not touch his mother-in-law, but just his presence spoke volumes. Julie's condition was obvious, and the questions in everyone's eyes were clear. Politeness ruled, however, and, and they waited for Theresa to talk. Theresa took a moment to compose herself, then said "Mom, Dad, Sis: I divorced Vince, and I am pregnant. As you can see, Julie is also pregnant. She was married in June. This is Glen, her husband." That was enough to rock them to their heels, and the next four hours were spent filling in background on what had happened, going back many years. Julie and Glen, impressed with the genuine concern and acceptance they saw, added to the conversation when Theresa faltered. It was very enlightening for Glen, particularly since he saw none of the old Theresa in her family. Julie's theory that her mother had been overshadowed and 'shaped' by Vince began to make more sense to him. At the airport as Julie and Glen were heading back home, another watershed event occurred. During the goodbyes, Theresa's emotional level was painfully evident. She was so grateful to Julie and Glen for making the trip, yet felt constrained from showing her gratitude in the way she wanted to. Once again, it was Glen who was the trigger. He saw Theresa's state, and saw Julie also looking poised for some kind of show of affection. His own misgivings about Theresa had been largely washed away as he watched the woman bare her soul to her family. There was no longer any doubt in his mind that she had changed. There was still a lot of hurt for her to account for, but he was not a vengeful person. Glen put his arm around Julie, then grabbed Theresa's hand and pulled her toward them. When she was in reach, he pulled mother and daughter to himself and into each other. He felt Julie stiffen for a moment before she disintegrated in tears and hugged her mother for the first time in many, many years. An onlooker would have thought they were parting for a lifetime, judging by the quantity of tears. Those who mattered understood the import of the gesture. ------- Despite the love he must have still felt, Vince reacted to Theresa the same way as he had to the children. He refused to see her or talk to her. She had made her choice and had rejected him. He was the injured party - he had done nothing wrong. He had to forget her and get on with his life. With his exceptional belief in his own rightness, Vince somehow even glossed over his adultery. He had been the victim there, too, in his mind. She had deprived him of sex, and he had to find it somewhere. And Theresa's dirty trick of making him impregnate her! He had to stay away from thinking about the baby she was carrying. It was his baby, and that still had an impact on him. Of course, he would just have to forget about it, just as he had done with Julie and Terry. It was the only way to protect himself. The whole separation process was a testament to Vince's mental toughness and his enormous self-righteousness. Over a period of nine months, the life he once considered ideal had totally disintegrated. Because of his deeply-ingrained cultural beliefs about family, only his conviction that he was the wronged party kept away the anguish and regret that he should have felt. Not only had his ungrateful offspring ruined the plans he had for them; they had turned his wife's head to believing it was the parents' fault. Because of that, his marriage to the woman he had always loved was over. The children were the cause of all of the bad that had befallen him, and he hated them for it. His hatred of Julie was what prevented him from revealing her deception. No way did he want her to profit from him slipping up. The college funds had been a particularly bitter pill. Only the threat that Theresa would get even more had made him concede. It did not take long after Theresa's pilgrimage 'home' before word got to Vince's family, from Theresa's, obviously. Telling his family was something he had just put out of his mind, and the call from his mother caught him off-guard. Vince's controlling nature most definitely came down from his mother, and the fury she unleashed on him was unbelievable. Interestingly, the main focus of her anger was the fact that she had been kept in the dark (Vince's father was a non-factor in anything having to do with relationships.) Because of all the shots he had taken, Vince was not of a mind to take any crap from anyone, even the mother who had assumed it as her right for his whole life. She had been justifiably proud of her son, for his accomplishments, and for the exemplary family life he had lived. It was the way she had brought him up, after all. Theresa's mother had quite openly blamed Vince for the breakup, both the adultery and the treatment of the children. Vince's mother chose to ignore the adultery, and bristled at the other accusation. He was only doing what she would have done, after all. Thinking about it later, Vince decided that one phone call had solved his family problem very nicely. After a vintage screaming match with his mother that lasted nearly half an hour, it would be a long time before he had to think about communicating with his parents or other relatives. It was no harder writing them off than it was his wife and kids. It was no harder positioning them as the offenders and himself the victim than it was with his wife and kids. ------- Ever concerned about hurting her career, and to her credit, Vince's career also, Lee only allowed him to stay with her for five days. By that time, he was functional enough to go to work and appear quite normal. She helped him find a nice apartment very close to her condo, and she supervised the moving of his things out of the house. Lee and Theresa had never been antagonistic toward each other, and after the breakup, each grew to respect the other greatly. Theresa was grateful that Lee was taking charge of Vince in his time of distress. She felt little animosity toward him, and that made the separation harder. She read Lee's actions as a sign of remorse for the adultery. It was a response she would not have expected from the hard-driven woman. Lee was frankly in awe of the toughness Theresa showed through the whole process. She thought many times that she was glad she did not have to face Theresa across a negotiating table. It was hard for her to understand the emotions that had driven Theresa to her drastic actions, but she could only admire the single-mindedness with which she carried out her plan. Even as wounded as he was, Lee was happy to have Vince back as a sex partner. Once his libido recovered from the humiliation of the divorce, he was back to his vigorous self - even more eager and intense than before. With the damper of conscience removed, he was proving to be the stud she had lusted after for so long. After several weeks, Lee sensed a growing dependency from Vince. That was the last thing she wanted, still convinced that she would never marry again. After one of their typically vigorous sessions, they were snuggled together in his bed when she decided she had to address the issue. "Hey, Lover. Are you starting to think of me as your unofficial wife?" "Huh?" That question completely blindsided Vince. "Maybe this isn't the perfect time, but I need to remind you that we are not a monogamous couple. In fact, we're not a couple at all." She felt she had to say that, but she could not resist softening the blow by gently twirling his limp penis in her fingers as she spoke. "I need to remind you that I will fuck someone else as soon as I get a chance and feel the need." Having recovered a little of his composure, he boasted "Guess I'll just have to make sure you don't feel the need, then." "That's not the point," she insisted. "We've both seen the bad side of marriage. I don't want to go there again, and I don't think you do, either." Not too happy about the conversation, he told her "You're the only one I have sex with. I can't help being a little dependent, can I?" "But you're not my only one. I just want to make sure you don't forget that." She intended to suggest that he find other partners, as well, but somehow, she could not get the words out. In truth, she had not been with anyone else since their first time, even through the dry spell she had imposed when she feared discovery. She had to keep telling herself that she was not addicted to Vince. There was no way Lee could allow herself to develop more than sexual feelings for Vince. From her conversations with Theresa, she had begun seriously examining what he was really like, and much of it was not positive. There was no longer any question in her mind that he had indeed created a home environment that was unlivable for the children. He had perhaps the most powerful ego she had ever encountered. The fact that he seemed able to completely shut out his former family was astonishing. Frightening and disturbing as Vince's personality was to Lee, it was also compelling in a way. She could certainly understand why Theresa had fallen in love with him. He was the first man she had ever encountered that she was not certain she could 'manage'. Right after the divorce, he had been almost childlike, but that had changed very rapidly. Strength respects strength, and she was frankly a little in awe of him. ------- Vince's normal composure held up fairly well under Lee's caution against monogamous thinking. It actually hit him hard, but he hid his reaction well. First because of his guilt over adultery, and after the divorce, because of his general upset and disorientation, Lee had undeniably managed the relationship. It was beginning to bother Vince that he was not as in charge as he felt he should be. It bothered him a lot more that Lee had detected a measure of dependency in him. Vince Menconi was dependent on no one but Vince Menconi. It was true that he had started to think of Lee as his woman. He knew that she could not be possessed in that way, but their regular and frequent unions had made him forget. While he was seeking sleep after the troubling conversation, it occurred to Vince what he needed to do. The first requirement was to make it clear to Lee that he was definitely not dependent on her. That meant another woman - or other women. ------- Chapter 15 Many nights, Theresa wished she had Vince's ability to just write someone off and forget them. She had known it would be hard facing everything alone, but it was worse than she expected. Things were much closer between her and Julie, but still not to the point of sharing in typical mother-daughter fashion. There were only two people Theresa could rely on for any support and help: Julia and Betty. Betty no longer harbored her old anger at Theresa, but she had not intended to become her friend and confidante, either. With the tight relationship between their children, though, it would be hard to reject Theresa. Now that she had a new direction in life, Theresa was turning out to be a surprisingly interesting friend. Betty saw in her a level of sophistication, a touch of class, that she herself did not possess. But Theresa in no way exhibited any sense of superiority over Betty. Quite to the contrary, she almost worshipped Betty as the kind of mother she wanted to be. Just as she had reacted with Terry, Betty was unable to turn away a person sincerely seeking help. Thus, Theresa spent increasing amounts of time at the Vosses. She was always careful to make sure it was OK with Julie and Terry before she came over. Terry feared the wrath of Ellie and Betty if he objected. He would never admit it, but it was becoming easier with every visit to forget the Theresa that he remembered from his tortured home life. To himself, he had to admit that she was a very likable person. ------- About two weeks after the emotional trip to tell her family, Theresa decided to tackle another highly emotional issue. She needed to tell the children about the college trusts. Her first inclination was to talk to them one-by-one, but the lives of all of those in the Voss house had become highly intertwined. Because of the money for Glen, Betty and Alan were strongly impacted, and Ellie and Terry might as well have been married, as closely as their futures were connected. Her biggest fear was that all three would flatly reject the money, and part of the reason for including Betty and Alan was to bring some less emotional thinking to bear. Unquestionably, relations between herself and Julie had changed dramatically. Whether they had changed enough to allow Glen to accept the money, she could not be sure. When everyone was still at the dinner table, even Marty, she asked for their attention. "I need to tell you all something very important," she began. "Don't tell me you have even more surprises," Alan joked. "Have you found another husband already?" "Alan, Honey, that wasn't very funny," Betty chided him, unable to suppress her own giggle nevertheless. "No, this affects all of you more directly," Theresa said, too intent to respond to Alan's gibe. "I know you kids don't want to accept any help from me, and I can understand the reasons. You view it as trying to buy back your love after all the bad things I did. I can't deny that I wish there was a way to do that, but that's really not what we're talking about here. This is a normal parental obligation and privilege that Vince and I would have fulfilled if... if only..." At that point, Theresa's voice caught and she could not continue. She stared down at her lap for a while, trying to regain her composure. When her head came back up, her eyes were glistening but she was able to speak. "As part of the divorce settlement, I set up college trust funds for Julie, Terry, and Glen." As she had expected, there was a buzz of mixed surprise and objections at the pronouncement. "Wait! Please! Just listen before you tell me you don't want anything to do with the money. I know that's your reaction." Things quieted down quickly, and she went on to explain. "If the money is not used, it will be split between Vince and me after ten years. I don't need it, and I suspect you would hate to see him get it - I would." "There is not enough money for Harvard or anything like that. I set the amount for Glen at four years worth of tuition and fees at State. I also set it up so you can get the money even if you have a scholarship. Terry, I'm sure you will get one. You can use the money to bring Ellie to see you every weekend, if that's what you decide." After the initial reaction, no one else had spoken, and Theresa went on. "Glen, there is no question your fund is prompted by a guilty conscience - I will admit that. We were the major cause of you having to give up your scholarship, and that will haunt me the rest of my life." Glen did not respond, but his look was less angry than it might have been. "The reason I am telling you now is so that you, Glen, can have the money for next semester. Maybe it will help you spend a little more time with Julie and the baby. Maybe it will mean Julie can stay on leave a little longer. I..." Once again, emotion made it hard for her to speak, and she had to pause. "I appreciate all of you not refusing out of hand. Maybe you're just being polite, I don't know. Julie and Terry, the money is only a fraction of what we would have spent if things hadn't..." She had to take another pause for composure. "The funds were started when you were born, so it is really your money." "You will hurt me deeply if you refuse the money. If you still feel the need to do that, I will understand. But you will be hurting yourselves, too. I've already done enough of that to last your lifetime." "How did Dad ever agree to this?" Terry asked. "Adultery is treated harshly in divorce court in this state. If he had not agreed, it would have gone to the judge. His lawyer and Lee convinced him he would have been much worse off. I didn't ask for nearly as much overall as I could have gotten." "Why would Lee stand up for us?" Julie asked. "Well, she wanted to help your Dad salvage as much as he could," Theresa answered. "Despite what happened, she is not a bad person. She honestly tried to get me to take him back." Those questions were really just a diversion to keep the kids from having to think about their decision. There were lots of competing emotions involved. "Um, I can explain more if anyone needs it, but maybe we should all just sleep on it for a few days." Betty was frankly overwhelmed at Theresa's gesture toward Glen. She suspected that his fund was pulled from the larger college funds that had already built up for the other two. Her growing friendship with Theresa had so far not included any physical contact, but that changed as soon as everyone left the table. Seeing that Theresa was on edge emotionally, Betty put an arm around her and led her up to the master bedroom. Before they reached the top of the stairs, Theresa's tears started in earnest, and by the time they were seated on the bed, she was sobbing full force. Betty kept a comforting arm around her and just waited her out, grabbing some tissues from the nightstand to dry her cheeks. ------- Theresa had fantasized about being pregnant along with her daughter. She was afraid to expect it to draw them closer, but it did. Julie had little chance for contact with her contemporaries, and almost none of them were in her situation, anyway. Though she did not realize it, she had a need for a pregnant friend. Her mother started to fill that role. Things started slowly, at least for Julie, but by the time she neared delivery and Theresa was definitely showing, they were joking and swapping anecdotes about their discomforts. They were becoming far closer than Theresa, Julia, and particularly Julie ever thought they would. No one was disturbed or upset at the growing closeness between pregnant daughter and pregnant mother. Glen and all of his family believed that a normalized relationship with her mother would be the best thing for Julie. They were all convinced of the reality of the change in Theresa, and there was constant evidence of her remorse. ------- 'No-frills' was the key word for Glen and Julie when it came to finances. They were both determined not to drain any more of the Voss household's tight budget than they had to. Alan and Betty had flatly refused to take any money for food or utilities, although Theresa had slipped Betty two more secret cash donations which were gratefully accepted. Alan had bought the materials for the basement apartment on the theory that it was part of their house. Terry had tried very hard to do the bulk of the work. There had been enough outside remodeling jobs that he was able to buy his own school clothes and supplies. Glen and Julie had been able to purchase a car in September. It was still a juggling act with their differing schedules, but they managed not to use one of Alan's cars very often. Betty was working more hours than she had before, starting when the kids went back to school. She was still adamant about being home most of the time when Ellie and Marty were there, and it was an article of faith for her to be at every swimming meet or basketball game. She and Alan were in perfect agreement that that was far more important than the extra money she might be giving up. It wasn't quite 'living on love' for Glen and Julie, but it was not a big step beyond that. In some ways it was not really a bad thing that they had so little to spend. Glen had discovered that 'pampering' his pregnant wife was no chore at all. Unable to buy her most of the things he would have liked to, he tried to make up for it with his attention. Her response should no longer have surprised him, but it often did. He could honestly believe she valued the intimacy more than she would the presents he could not afford. As her pregnancy advanced, the young marrieds recaptured more and more of the magic that had drawn them together in the first place. Both of them were partially driven by guilt, but the result was the same: going out of their way to accommodate their lover became a natural habit. Natal classes were one expense that Glen insisted they take on. With their schedules, it was tricky working out times when they could attend together, but they found a way. He always took her for a meal or a movie after the classes, so it became a date night. With all the attention to her body and her naturally enhanced sex drive, class nights became a treasured event - another bonding experience. There was no way Julie could forget how she got pregnant, nor could her conscience be subdued. However, the increasing closeness between her and Glen and the wholehearted eagerness with which he anticipated the baby made it much easier to live with what she had done. The result of her actions was something that Glen considered wonderful; that helped a lot. One of the obvious things that had drawn Julie to Glen in the first place was the sharp contrast between him and her father. Vince had never been physical with his family, but Julie always had the sense that she was battling for every little scrap of self. Glen, on the other hand, put no pressure on her. In fact, he seemed dedicated to making her feel better about herself. From the darker days of the summer, when Julie was often near tears over their situation, she approached Christmas happier than she had been in years. It had taken that long for her to accept that the relaxed, low-stress lifestyle of the Voss family was for real. Home had always been a place that was her base, but not a comfortable place to be. So much of her life had been spent avoiding any significant time there. Now, she looked forward to coming home from work, not just because work was over, but because she could truly relax; of course, knowing that Glen was waiting to give her a rubdown made it just that much better. ------- On several occasions, Theresa would come over late in the evening and stay after Glen went to work. Everyone was concerned about her driving home in the wee hours, but she shrugged it off. Both neighborhoods were quite safe, and she had an automatic garage door for entry at her house. Julie even tried so get her to sleep over, but Theresa was not ready for that. Those late nights turned out to be some of the best mother-daughter discussions. Julie was always in a great mood after Glen had rubbed lotion all over her, and usually, they made love. Theresa was eating up everything about her daughter's pregnancy. It had been almost eighteen years since her last childbirth, and her excitement was building every week. Theresa had always liked Glen, and had never been able to ignore his great body. Her only misgivings had been his desire to be a teacher, and his reluctance to spend any time at the Menconi house. Now, she understood his lack of visits. Her ideas about proper financial support for her daughter were moderating, as well. She still thought Glen could find a much better career, but seeing how content the Vosses were on their income made her realize that all of the Menconi money had not produced real satisfaction. Julie could never stop talking about all of the things Glen was doing for her and with her. One night after birth class, dinner, and an especially tender session in bed, she could not restrain her exuberance in telling Theresa about it. Theresa broke down. It was one of those times that brought the downside of her situation into sharp focus. She had thought through the problems of single motherhood, but some things just can't be pictured ahead of time. The loneliness of going through pregnancy and birth alone became more frightening in the face of Julie's contentment with Glen. Displays of affection between Julie and her mother were becoming natural since the trip to tell the family, and Julie did her best to comfort Theresa as she cried. "Are you sorry you divorced Dad?" Julie asked. "Oh, I was sorry when I did it," Theresa answered through her sobs. "I didn't want to do it at all, and I tried everything I could to get him to change." "I can't imagine him being anything like Glen when you were pregnant," Julie mused. "I... I don't think he was as good as Glen," Theresa admitted, "but he was tender and considerate, and he took very good care of me." "That's what's hard to imagine," Julie told her. They talked for a while longer about pregnancy issues and the problems Theresa would face alone. Feeling so good about herself, and having had one of her best discussions with her mother, Julie decided to broach a more delicate subject. "Mom, I hope this doesn't offend you, but well... Glen and I have talked about this quite a bit, especially after he met your family... do you think that Dad kind of, uh, made you like you were? - I mean, like you were to us?" The question was something Theresa had honestly never thought about, and it stunned her. She just stared at Julie for quite a while without answering. "Um... why would you think that?" she asked softly. "Well, for one thing, we didn't see anything in Gram and Pops that could have made you that way," Julie explained. She had no problem referring to Theresa's former behavior, since Theresa herself was so open about it. "Also," Julie went on, "you changed so quickly and completely. We've sorta decided you couldn't change that much if the old you was the real one." "Ooooh!" was all Theresa could get out before lapsing into silent thought again. "The problem with that theory," she said after a while, "is that it would make it seem like none of that was really my fault. I can't think that way! I did those things. If I let Vince make me that way, that's my fault, too. I should have been stronger than that." "But do you see why we've wondered?" Julie asked. "Dad's a piece of work, you know. From talking with the others here, we've pretty much decided he has the biggest ego on the planet." "Couldn't argue with that," Theresa mused aloud. "It's so big he cannot imagine that he could ever be in the wrong." They chewed on that thought silently for a while, comfortable with each other and their memories. Theresa broke the silence with a question: "Do you have any desire to see him or talk to him?" "Do you?" Julie shot back with a question. "You said he has written you off just like he did us. That must hurt." "I don't know how to answer that," Theresa admitted. "You can't spend that many years with someone, and believe you sincerely love him, without some regrets when he is gone." "Well, I don't have the good memories to look back on," Julie stated, "so I can't say that I honestly miss him. I think forgetting he was ever my Dad will be just fine." "You didn't have good memories of me, either, did you?" Theresa asked fearfully. "Not very many, Mom," Julie said gently. "How are you able to get past that?" "I... I think we're building some good memories now - starting all over." "I can't tell you how much I appreciate getting the chance to do that," Theresa said, unable to stop the flow of tears. "I honestly don't think I deserve it." "If it hadn't been for Glen and Betty and Julia, I would never have given you a chance. They knew what was best for me." "But they haven't told you that about your father, have they?" Theresa asked. "No, because he has shown no sign of changing, or even caring what we think about him. That's the difference. You did everything you could to convince me you were different." "Yeah, I guess I did." They looked at each other and started giggling, both remembering Theresa's exhibitionist efforts. Thinking back to how the discussion started, Julie got serious again and told her mother "We'll do everything we can to help you through this, Mom, even Glen will." "Does that mean he'll take me to birth classes?" Theresa asked, then giggled. "Oh! Don't know about that. Suppose you want him in the delivery room, too, huh?" That made them both laugh. ------- Things were not as warm and light-hearted for Vince. The last eight months had been a sequence of things that he never thought could happen to him. This latest challenge, finding another woman or women for sex partners, looked as daunting as the ones that had gone before. Actually, he had no real need to go looking. He had an ideal partner in Lee, one who matched his drive and his intensity. The arrangement they had could have lasted indefinitely, to the benefit of both of them, had Lee not made a serious tactical error. She was very concerned about their relationship evolving into a de facto marriage, particularly as she found out more about Vince's personality and his role in the destruction of his family. To give her credit, she also wanted to protect him from a big letdown if he had started seeing her as his new wife. Unfortunately, she still had not learned enough about Vince to understand the response he would have to her proclamation. She intended to just make sure he kept the relationship in perspective. What she did instead was to trigger a competitive response from him. To Vince, sex was a competition, marriage was a competition: anything that two or more people engaged in together was a competition. The particular contest that Lee unwittingly initiated was about who would hurt the other, rather than being hurt themselves. Twisted? Of course, but that's how his mind worked. It was important to his ego to be the first to find an additional partner, just in case he might feel hurt or jealous if she was the first. Although torture could not have made him admit it, Vince had suffered a series of hurts, and he was not about to expose himself to another. Theresa and the children had all hurt him by their abandonment. Twenty plus years of dedicated monogamy are poor preparation for 'getting back in the game', as legions of divorced men have discovered. Vince did not even have the practice of finding a woman to cheat with. Lee had quite literally fallen into his lap. Vince's high school and college dating were obviously aimed at finding sex partners, but were actually much more concerned with finding a life mate. This was a completely different scenario, and he had no idea how to proceed. Analytical thinking and tactical planning skills were some of the things that had earned him career success, and he brought them to bear on the sex partner problem. Since the divorce, he had been spending considerably more time at work. Lee consumed some of the remaining time, but they only spent their time together on sex. They did not 'date' in the sense of going places. Thus, it was surprising how much time was available when there was no house and family to attend to. The biggest question in his mind was where to find the right kind of women, but before addressing that, he had to decide what the right kind of women were. The obvious answer was that they had to fuck like Lee, and look like either Lee or Theresa. That thought surprised him a little, as hard as he had tried to remove all thought of Theresa from his mind. He knew instinctively that brainless bimbos would never do it for him. He was too used to strong, intelligent partners. The company, its customers, and its suppliers were filled with strong, intelligent women, many of them very attractive and available. Much as he enjoyed the relationship with Lee, though, he preferred to avoid the complications of another workplace affair. Throughout his childhood, Vince's family's social life had been centered on the church. Indeed, that had held true during his married life, as well. Somehow, he did not envision the kind of woman he wanted hanging out at church functions. Despite his many business trips, Vince had spent relatively little time in bars, usually only because it was necessary to be with a customer. Perhaps a bit snobbishly, he thought of the women to be found there as sluttish and desperate. A huge business segment for health clubs is the recently divorced, and Vince decided to join one. It would be his first serious physical program since his high school sports days ended. At least at health clubs, the women's bodies were fairly openly displayed. The idea of one with the discipline to follow an exercise program also appealed to him - certainly better than the average barfly. ------- He had been making very regular visits to the health club for almost a month, but had not made any good contacts, yet. It surprised him that he was going because he enjoyed the exercise, pickups or no. While working the machines, he could not help thinking, and he realized he had been feeling much more tension than he would have suspected. Following that line of thought, he recalled how frequently Terry had worked out or gone running, and he wondered if maybe... In his usual fashion, Vince cut off that thread very quickly. It was while on a machine that he heard two women talking nearby. Actually, he only heard a small snippet, but it gave him his lead. They were talking about a website and chatroom, giggling at the audacity of some of the personals that were posted. It was a method of contact he had never considered. High-speed web access was already set up in both his office and his apartment, but his use had been limited to work, travel, and some shopping. He had picked up the name of the site from the overheard conversation, and checked it out as soon as he got home. From there, he found several others that offered similar 'hook-up' services. Just perusing the listings on one site, he saw a real possibility. It was from a city he visited frequently, and would be traveling to later that week. His original intention was to find another woman locally, but the possibility of a sexual outlet when he was on the road without Lee had real appeal. The posting said 'MWF, look 40ish, great bod, like it hard and fast.' That was all he could see until he paid the membership fee, which he did immediately. That allowed him to send a message and make direct contact. Over the next two days, he had to get a digital camera, take some pictures of himself, and send them to his prospective liaison. She, of course, had pictures ready for him. She turned out to be 50ish, but did indeed have a very nice body. She convinced him that the kind of sex he liked was just what she needed for relief from a husband that had checked out sexually. Claire, the woman he was trying to connect with, seemed determined to step out on her husband. She claimed she still loved him deeply: he was a good husband, father, and provider. According to her, this was her first foray into sex outside her marriage, and she admitted to being very nervous. Apparently, for all of his good qualities, Claire's husband was adamant about not seeking medical help for his diminishing libido. Several years older than her, he tried to convince her it was just a natural consequence of aging. Since he was just sixty, she was not buying that argument, and it had put a definite strain on their marriage. Claire's husband was on the road frequently with work, so stepping out at night was not a problem for her. However, she insisted that the only place she would be with him was in his hotel room. There would be no dinners, no drinks at the bar, no movies, etc. She needed the sex, but felt compelled to minimize the risk of discovery. ------- Although he would have been loathe to admit to nervousness, Vince's plane trip and the afternoon of meetings on the day of his first assignation with Claire seemed to drag interminably. He ate a quick room service meal, showered and shaved, and had way too much time to wait for her arrival. When she knocked on his door, precisely on time, he had to suppress a little queasy feeling as he went to let her in. Claire very quickly gave him much more to think about than his nerves. They had exchanged many chat messages, and talked on the phone several times, as well. He thought he had a good read on her. Her polite, smiling 'Hello Vince' seemed perfectly relaxed and normal. When she bent to remove the casual, low-heeled boots she wore, she was completely at ease. Then, she stood up straight, looked him in the eye, and said "God, Vince! Did you think we were going to play gin tonight, or something?" He was fully, if casually dressed, and she chose that fact to gain the upper hand. Removing her long, cold-weather coat left her completely naked, catching him more than a little off-balance. Before he could generate a comment, she was on her knees at his feet, unfastening his belt and lowering his zipper. In mere seconds, she had yanked down his slacks and shorts to bare his penis, which had not yet started to react. "Yessss!" she exclaimed with open glee. "You never showed me this in the pictures. Now, let's see what he's like at attention." With that, she took the limp organ in her mouth and began swirling her tongue all around it. Before long, her mouth was too full of engorged cock to allow for much tongue movement. She dropped his erection from her mouth and reached down to take off his shoes with so much determination that she almost made him lose his balance. That seemed to be his wake-up call. He grabbed her by the forearms and pulled her to her feet, grinning at her as he did so. Resting one hand on her shoulder, he got his shoes off quickly and step out of his puddled slacks and shorts. "On the bed! On your knees!" he ordered. After a brief surprised look, it was her turn to grin, and she dashed toward the bed. He followed, stripping off his shirt as he went. Although he was always energetic in sex, he was always careful to make sure the woman was ready. This time, though, he assumed from her actions that there would be no lubrication problem. He got on his knees on the bed behind her and plunged right in. She was more than ready. One of Vince's fears while setting up the liaison was the danger of disease. It had taken many exchanges before they were both convinced that the other was clean. In her case, a hysterectomy had removed any chance of pregnancy, and they had agreed to go bareback. Lee had not been able to meet him for a send-off that morning since he left very early. However, they had met the three previous days, so his urgency was not great. The feel and just the idea of a different woman added a lot of stimulation, but he was able to establish a stimulating rhythm that he felt he could maintain for quite a while. After less than a minute, she yelled back at him "Hey, Stud! When you gonna put it in gear? That's not hard and fast." That said, she started lunging back at him, hard. The first thrust almost sent him back onto the floor. His immediate reaction was a sharp slap to her ass cheek. Her reaction was another "Yessssss!" and a series of grunts as the pounding picked up intensity. The ground rules were established, the gloves were off, and he was in his element. He started reaching under her to maul one breast, not viciously, but not gently, either. Next, he moved his hand down her front, grabbing a handful of loose flesh wherever he could and squeezing it firmly. It was a way of asserting his dominance. To his surprise, she had the perfect response. It suddenly felt like a vise had been clamped on his cock. He had heard of women with vaginal muscle control, but neither Theresa nor Lee had shown him anything unusual. Claire was another story. For the next few minutes, their encounter became the sexual competition he liked so much. He used his cock and his hands; she used her cunt and her hammering ass. Together, they worked each other to higher and higher levels of arousal. When he could tell he was almost to the point of no return, Vince found her clit and pinched, just as he had done the first time with Lee. The results were the same, if not more dramatic. She screeched in pain momentarily, then crashed over into a thundering climax. As she came, her vaginal contractions became even stronger, and the come was literally wrung from him in his own violent orgasm. They both crashed to the bed on their sides and lay panting until their breathing returned to normal. She rolled over to face him and playfully poked him in the chest with her finger. "You know," she said, "nothing looks dorkier than a man with nothing on but socks." "Dorkier? Where'd you get that word?" he asked. "I've got grandkids, remember?" "Well, I know why Grandpa isn't interested in sex any more. You wore him out!" he teased her. The reaction from her was not what he expected, considering the bantering, challenging tone of their encounter so far. She looked away from his face and was silent for several seconds. "Vince, I don't want to be a wet blanket, but could I ask you not to make any jokes about him? He really is a great guy and I really do love him. This... this sex is... something I just had to try." "Sorry, Claire," he told her, meaning it. "I meant it as a compliment, really." "I know you did. It's just... well, I said it, okay?" "No problem. I sure don't want to do anything to discourage you from more of this." A couple of hours later, when Claire insisted she had to go home, Vince found himself feeling a little down. The sex had been very good. Her body was not the masterpiece that Theresa or Lee could boast, but she entered in wholeheartedly and left him well sated. The reason he felt down was that he had wanted her to stay the night, and she had refused. Lee sometimes slept all night with him, but not often. He had to admit to himself that he missed the feeling of a female body in bed with him. He missed the intimacy, a fact he had never recognized in his mind before. Wondering if he would ever again have a woman who was there all the time did nothing to ease his mood. ------- Christmas, naturally a rather emotional time, highlighted the changes that had befallen the Menconi and Voss families. The fact that Theresa had to ask if her children would accept Christmas gifts from her emphasized the enormity of what had happened as much as anything else. Along with that was Theresa's personal debate about sending some kind of gift to Vince. Julie and Glen agreed to accept gifts, but both insisted they should be baby things, none of which they had acquired yet. That was not hard for Theresa to accept at all. Her only problem was that the gifts would have to be in colors other than pink and blue, since the sex was not known. Under strong pressure from Ellie, Terry agreed to accept a gift, as well. Theresa worked at her gift selection with the same intensity as the house-warming gift. There were many baby things to chose from, but she decided to stay very practical. One thing she came up with was a six-month subscription to a diaper service. She thought that sticking to things that would truly make their lives easier would be the best idea. She added several items of clothing and a few infant toys. A gift choice for Terry was even harder. Finally, she had an inspiration and talked to Marty. As a result, she got him a pair of top-quality work gloves and a carpenters work vest. Over Theresa's vigorous protests, Betty demanded that she be present for the family's normal gift-giving time, early Christmas morning. That meant staying overnight in a house with all beds occupied. Terry insisted that his mother use Ellie's bed and Ellie sleep with him, something they had planned for Christmas Eve, anyway. Betty was worried about how Theresa would react to that sleeping arrangement, as was Ellie. Theresa, showing great perceptiveness took care of that problem by suggested the same arrangement at dinner one night. That made it even harder for Terry to maintain his animosity toward his mother. By family tradition, gifts were exchanged while still in bedclothes, and Betty was adamant that the expanded family group would not change that. It turned out to be a very rewarding time. Both Julie and Terry had bought small but thoughtful gifts for Theresa, as had Betty. Julie and Terry received those from their mother with genuine appreciation. Theresa spent most of the morning very near to tears. ------- Christmas broke through Vince's veneer of toughness and self-sufficiency as nothing else had managed to do. Lee had family in the area, and had to spend some time with them. He was left alone for most of two days. When he opened one unidentified gift that had arrived in the mail and found that it was from Theresa, he hit the bottle. His angst was mostly over the injustices that had been done to him, but thoughts of trying to recapture his lost marriage intruded during his weaker moments. Lee had never before seen him even a little drunk, but she reacted well when she came to his apartment late Christmas afternoon. She seemed to pick up quickly on what was troubling him and did everything she could to distract him. Lee received a jolt of her own around supper time. Vince was in the bathroom when the phone rang, so she picked it up and saw the name Claire on the caller ID. The woman on the line asked for Vince, and Lee went to tell him about the call. The call was brief, probably because Claire knew Lee was with him. Lee was conflicted over whether to ask him about the caller. Her curiosity was strong, but it would be against her own cautions to seem at all possessive. Curiosity won out and she used all of her self-control to keep her tone playful. "So, Lover, have you got a woman in every port, now?" In the three weeks since his first time with Claire, Vince had debated about how to let Lee know. She had to know: that was the whole point of finding a woman, after all. At the same time, he did not want to seem to gloat. He wanted to give the impression that it was no big deal - of course he had women in other cities. Claire's call could not have worked out better. "Not every port. I go way too many places." Considering his level of inebriation, his reply was remarkable. "Tell me about her," Lee told him, her voice still not revealing. "Really? Why do you want to know?" "Well, we have something important in common, don't you think?" He probably described Claire more truthfully than he had intended, given how much he had drunk. He was able to make up a story about how he met her. It would never do to let on how hard he had searched to find Claire. Lee was definitely knocked off balance by the news about Claire. It did not stop her from entering vigorously into the sex that came later, but she could not get the other woman out of her mind. Nor could she quite understand why it bothered her so much. ------- Lee had her own set of pressures at Christmastime. A Division General Manager was retiring in January, and she believed she should be chosen for the job. It carried an Executive VP title and a wonderful compensation package. She had spent several years in that division before moving to Product Management, so she felt she had the proper background. Even though she felt she was the leading candidate, she could not deny the fear of her gender costing her the spot. If that was not enough pressure, she was being aggressively recruited to be the president of much smaller but highly regarded company in a related industry. She had decided she wanted the EVP job more, but she also wanted a backup option. In her mind, gender bias would be the only possible reason she would be denied the job. That problem was not likely to change over time. Even though she had been the one to caution against dependence, Vince had become an important anchor in her life. She was as reluctant as Vince was to admit the need for anyone but herself, but the knowledge that he had other sexual interests hit her rather hard. Ever since the affair with Vince started and his divorce resulted, the regrets over her own divorce had been growing. She had thought she had gotten herself over Roland, but the love was still there. He was the most decent man she had ever met, and she cursed herself regularly for not honoring her vows to him. ------- Alone and pregnant is a tough life for any woman. While money was not a problem for Theresa, having no one around to help her was a challenge. Tough-minded as she was, and as determined as she was about her new family, she could not fend off all of the depression that attacked her. Vince had been at his best as a husband when she was carrying, and memories of those times came to her frequently and painfully. In mid-January, Theresa was four months along. Her belly was definitely swelling, and she could barely disguise her condition in normal clothes. Only her small-waisted shape made it possible to look nearly normal. Walking through the mall one day, she heard her name called, and tried to place the voice. When she turned, Roland Comstock, former husband of Lee Waters, almost skidded to a stop in front of her. Without a thought, they gave each other a friendly hug. There must have been more body contact during the hug than either intended, because she caught his puzzled expression when they broke apart. Realizing what the puzzlement must have been, Theresa made an instant decision. "You're not imagining it, Roland. I'm pregnant." Ordinarily, Theresa would never have spoken so openly about her condition to someone who was just an acquaintance. In the times she had been with Roland socially, though, she had felt very comfortable with him. He was perhaps the most gentle, courteous man she had ever met, along with Alan Voss. She had felt sorry for Roland when he and Lee had divorced, although it had always been hard to understand how they ever got together. "You are? I... well... uh... congratulations, Theresa!" As he said that, he was carefully examining her face. She just knew he was checking to see if condolences would be more appropriate. "Don't worry, Roland. I am very happy about it, and it was intentional." "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply..." Impulsively, she gave him another hug, this one very brief. "Don't worry, you haven't offended me. You're so sweet to worry about it. When a woman my age gets pregnant, people always wonder." "Actually," he said with a sincere smile, "if I didn't know better, I'd think you were just another young mother building her family. You don't look over thirty. You look great!" "If I didn't know that men never come on to pregnant women, I'd think you were flirting with me," she teased. "Oh, I would never flirt with a happily married woman," he said, his face suddenly serious. "I was just telling the truth. You look marvelous." "Well, I'm certainly a happy woman, but I'm no longer married. Guess you hadn't heard about the divorce." "Whaaaat? You've got to be kidding! You and Vince?" "It's, uh, kind of a long story, Roland. I, uh..." "Theresa, have you had lunch? Come on, tell me all about it over a meal, OK?" They ended up eating and talking for an hour and a half. It was therapeutic for Theresa to spill her story to someone new, and she ended up telling far more than she thought she would ever reveal. He was a good listener and showed no sign of condemnation over anything she said. When she had gone on for a long time, she finally stopped, noticing a wistful expression on his face. "Roland, I'm sorry. I've been prattling about me, and haven't even asked about you. Have you found someone?" He was silent for a while, apparently deciding how much to tell her. Then, he sighed and said "No, I haven't found anyone. Lee left me pretty messed up, and I didn't want anything to do with women for quite a while. Hearing you talk about children makes me realize what I've missed. I always thought of myself as a family man, but it looks like that will never happen." "Hey, let's keep this a happy occasion!" Roland said, realizing that the mood had become a bit somber. "I'm happy for you, and I'm so glad we ran into each other. Are you still living at the same place?" "Temporarily. The house has been sold, and will close in a couple of weeks. I'm thinking of buying a condo, but I've rented a place for now. I probably won't do anything else until after the baby comes." "Is there anything I can do to help with the move, or anything? My business pretty much runs itself right now, so it would be no problem." "It's sweet of you to offer, Roland, but I wouldn't want to impose." "Impose, nothing! I'd be delighted to help. It would be good focus on something besides myself and the business for once." Over her decreasing protests, he grilled her on all of the details of the sale and the move. Before she realized what was happening, he was making suggestions and offering to handle several tasks for her. "Roland, why are you doing this?" She asked after a while, amazed at how involved he had gotten. "I'm sorry, Theresa. Forgive me if I have intruded. It's just that... Look! Let me just say it. I have always thought you were the most delightful woman I ever met. Now I find out you're facing all of this stuff alone, and I sincerely would like to help. It would help me as much as you. I'm tired of only worrying about myself." Theresa could not stop her face from flushing at his words. Unbidden, her mind ran to wondering how deep his feelings for her might be. She had to mentally slap herself: she was older than him, and she was pregnant. That was not what men were looking for in a woman. It would be nice to have his help and his company. Be satisfied with that and quit dreaming! "That is so sweet of you! I will be grateful for any help you can give me" ------- Chapter 16 "Theresa, you look happier and more relaxed than I have seen you in a while," Betty said. Theresa was having dinner with the whole extended Voss family, a week after meeting Roland, and after seeing him three more times. "You have been pretty stressed lately." "Well, with the sale and the move coming up, there's a lot to think about." "You mean our help isn't enough to let you relax?" Alan asked teasingly. "Oh, without all your help, I'd be a mess," Theresa assured him, seriously. "I, uh, ran into an old acquaintance who is helping with some of the arrangements. It eased my mind a lot." "Can we assume this 'old acquaintance' is male?" Betty asked, not even trying to hide the tease. "Uh, yes... Oh, I'll just tell you who it is. I have a feeling there'll be no peace until I do." She then explained who Roland was, mentioning Lee and how the two couples had socialized some before. "That's interesting, Theresa," Betty said thoughtfully, "but you look like a woman who is more than just relieved from stress. Is there perhaps a romantic interest there?" "Roland is right up there with Alan as a nice guy. But I'm older and pregnant, so there is no chance of anything like that." "You're guessing at how he would feel. How do you feel about him?" "Betty!" Theresa's plea sounded girlish; as girlish as her blush looked. Betty realized she was embarrassing her in front of everyone, and quickly dropped the subject. Later, Betty caught Theresa by herself and apologized. "Oh, that's OK, Betty. I know you didn't do it to be mean." "Seriously, are you interested in Roland?" "It's... it's only been a few months since the divorce, Betty. I feel... unfaithful even thinking about another man." "You still haven't answered the question. Are you interested in Roland?" "I told you. He's younger. He wouldn't want to get involved with a pregnant woman." "Look, Lady: the way you keep dodging the question tells me you've got a thing for him." Betty had taken Theresa's hands and was speaking earnestly but gently. "You've been through a lot, and you've done some courageous things. If there is a chance of you getting together with this Roland, don't you dare blow it because you don't think he's interested. You're interested. Let him know that. Make him tell you whether he is or not. Seduce him!" "With this?" Theresa gestured at her belly. "You look great pregnant! As far as the age thing: you'll always look years younger than you are, you lucky bitch, you!" They both chuckled at that. "If you're like I was when I was pregnant, you must be wearing out vibrators, with no man around." "Betty!" "Well?" "Uh, yeah. It's a problem. It's one I didn't think about before I divorced Vince." "Would it have changed your mind?" "No, of course not." "Well, then, get Roland to take you to bed. I'll bet he's as horny as you are." "But we're just friends. We haven't even kissed." "Then stop wasting time. You're not getting any younger or any skinnier, you know." ------- When his assistant said there was a woman to see him, Roland thought it must be Theresa, and he was pleased. When the impressive Amazon type walked into his office, he was disappointed that it wasn't Theresa, but very much intrigued. "Mr. Comstock, I'm Betty Voss, a friend of Theresa's. Could I buy you lunch?" "Absolutely not. It's my treat." After several minutes of introductions and explanations, Betty got to the point. "Roland, I once almost hated Theresa for what she had done to her kids, hurting my son in the process. But she has made the most remarkable turnaround, and now she is a good friend. She is a passionate woman who is on a mission. God! I feel like I am in high school, matchmaking for two friends." "Matchmaking?" "Yes. I don't know how you feel, but I'm sure she has a thing for you. I also know she is so horny she can hardly stand it." "Huh?" "It happens to us women when we get pregnant. Anyway, maybe her belly turns you off, and maybe the idea of children terrifies you. I can understand that. What I'm asking is for you to help out my friend and take her to bed. It would be great if it developed into more than that, but just that much would help her a lot." Roland just stared at her for a while, then said "Betty, your husband is one lucky man!" "I try my damndest to make him think so." "I'm sure it took a lot of nerve to meet me like this. I, uh, couldn't just take Theresa to bed just for sex. I'm not wired that way." "I'm sorry," she said hurriedly. "I didn't mean to imply that..." "I'm not offended. Actually, I'm grateful you took the initiative. You see, I've been attracted to Theresa since I first met her, even when I was married. As far as children: my biggest regret is that I never got to be a father. So, her being pregnant is not a problem. It's actually a plus." "Even if it's Vince's child?" "If something develops between us, I would hope there would be a chance for more children." "Roland, I'm telling you: don't wait for something to develop. She is at a place where she needs you right now. If you are interested in her, tell her! Then fuck her brains out. She won't turn you down, I guarantee it." "I didn't realize she had those feelings for me," he said softly. "That's why you needed a matchmaker," Betty said with a giggle. "This is all so sudden," he mused. "So what will another month or two of loneliness and horniness benefit either of you?" ------- Roland was shaken up by Betty's visit, but he could not bring himself to make such a bold step. He could not shake the feeling that he would be taking advantage of Theresa when she was needy. For the next few days, he continued to help her with her change of residence, making no move of a romantic nature. When a man has been through the trauma of betrayal and divorce, purposely making himself vulnerable to another woman is not a trivial step. It had taken several weeks after the first clues before Roland had admitted to himself that Lee was having sex with other men. When confronted, she had not denied it. Instead, she had tried again and again to explain that it was just sex, an outlet she needed because of her huge sex drive. She had declared her love for him only, repeatedly and convincingly, but it had not been enough. From the time of her admission, he lost the urge for sex with her. Both spouses were deeply wounded by the blow-up of the marriage. She honestly loved him and was well aware of what a fine husband he was. Many times, she cursed her driving need for more and higher-intensity sex. In every other part of her life, she was in complete control. Her one area of uncontrolled weakness had cost her something she knew she would be unlikely to find again. Lee had promised future faithfulness, but it had not been enough for Roland. Besides serious doubts that she could keep her promise, being a cuckold was intolerable to him. In all of his dealings with people, Roland was considerate, diplomatic, and gentle. People who knew him were amazed at his business success, reading him as too easy-going to be a successful entrepreneur. Underneath his genuine nice-guy exterior, Roland was a tightly-controlled battler with enormous pride. That pride could not handle the thought of other men knowing they were violating his wife. He simply could not forgive her for it. Just as much as Lee, Roland was aware that he had lost something irreplaceable. He was not into passive or obsequious women. Nor could he tolerate a manipulator. Strong and driven as she was, Lee had respected his independence, and acted as his partner. If only she could have kept her pants on... It was not in Roland's nature to cut off all communication with Lee, as Vince later did with Theresa. Whenever they talked, which was every few months, she never failed to apologize, and she never failed to ask if they could try again. He sincerely wished he could bring himself to try again with her, but after the initial pain had subsided a little, he spent some time in therapy. Through that, he learned that he and Lee were probably doomed to failure from the start. The marriage simply had a different position on each of their personal priority scales. Lee loved him as much as was possible for her, but for her, love did not outrank satisfaction of her other drives. With the therapist, Roland talked a lot about what he wanted from a marriage. At that point, he had no desire to marry again at all, but the therapist pushed the topic anyway. Her intent was to build understanding of why marriage to Lee had failed, relieving any guilt Roland might have felt. Some rather surprising things came from the therapy sessions. Like most men, Roland wanted respect, support, encouragement, and affection from a wife. Fidelity was critically important to him, tied strongly to feelings of respect. At the same time, he had a very strong need to care for and nurture family members, things that were quite unnecessary with Lee. His drive to dominate and control was far below normal, at least within the marriage partnership. As if he needed any painful reminders, he had a strong desire for children. The therapy was important to Roland. His business might have been at risk if he had not sought help. Even afterward, he was plagued by doubts over whether he should have initiated the divorce. His sessions had helped him realize that he was just being true to himself. Still, he often felt he should have been more forgiving. When Roland saw Theresa at the shopping mall, he had been out of treatment for about nine months, and much of the pain had become at least manageable. What was not manageable was the loneliness, the need for companionship. The news that Theresa was divorced triggered instant thoughts of them getting together. The times the Comstocks and Menconis had been together socially, Roland had not been able to suppress his thoughts about Theresa. His innate faithfulness and self-control prevented him from anything but idle daydreaming. Still, Theresa had stood at the top of his desirability scale since their first meeting. Hearing about her pregnancy before learning of her divorce did nothing to quench Roland's desire for Theresa. If anything, it fueled it. After their first five minutes of conversation, he had a dream of marrying her. It was a dream he was afraid to pursue too quickly, but it was a dream he could not ignore. ------- Sometimes fate gives a nudge when nerve is lacking. Three days before the closing on Theresa's house, Roland was with her when she got a call from the apartment leasing company for her new place. He watched as she listened to the person on the other end, then answered rather angrily "Well, I'm sorry for them, but I need that apartment. I have a lease, and I've made my deposit." After listening a while longer, she again was agitated as she said "Is it on the ground floor? No? Then I'm not interested." After another pause, she was even more upset as she said, loudly "More space I don't need. I need the ground floor. I'm sorry but..." "Tell them to hold for a minute," Roland said into her ear. Theresa looked at him with a puzzled expression, the anxiety apparent on her face. Then she complied and covered the mouthpiece as she explained what was happening. "Ask them if you can have two hours to consider it," he told her. Having no idea what he was up to, she talked to the agent, and made arrangements to call back with her answer. As soon as she hung up, he started to lead her to the car. "Uh, Roland... pregnant women have to pee before they can safely go out to get the newspaper. Give me a minute." After a bright blush, he laughed at himself. Fifteen minutes later, Roland pulled up to a very nice condo complex, and indicated a two-level unit on the end. "Do you think you could live there with the baby?" There was a ground level main entrance and garage on the upper floor, and another entrance on the lower walkout level. "Oh, it's wonderful, but I wasn't planning on anything that expensive." With that, he walked her to the door and let her in. That was when she caught on that it was his place. "Roland, what... ?" "Theresa, that phone call gave me the courage to do something I've wanted to do since that day at the mall. I'm asking you to move in here, with me." Her heart was suddenly pounding, and she felt faint. He noticed the sudden flush and reached out to steady her. "Are you asking me to live here as a boarder? Or are you asking to live wi... with you?" "With me, definitely. But if you only wanted to be a boarder, I would take that." That was too much, and he had to help her to a chair. "Roland," she stammered, "this is so sudden. I mean we haven't dated; we only met again a couple of weeks ago. I don't understand why... ? I'm older than you, and I'm pregnant with someone else's baby. What are you thinking?" "I'm thinking that I'm falling in love with you. It didn't take much, you know. I had a good start from when I first met you. You're only a few years older, and you look younger - that's not just a line! As for the baby: I had about given up being a father, and now I see a chance. All you've given me so far is positives." "Ohhhh, my! I don't know what to say! I need to think about this." "Sure. Take all the time you want." Pointedly looking at his watch, he added "You've got almost an hour and a half." That made them both laugh, but hers did not last long. "And if I wanted to just live here, in a separate room, you'd do that?" she asked. "Absolutely." She sat in thought for another minute, then stood and walked right up to him. Putting her arms around his neck, she said "That's not what I want, at all," and kissed him soundly. "I think we need to be open and honest with each other," she said when the kiss ended. "I can't honestly say I'm in love with you, Roland. I can say I could see it happening, but it is so soon." "I didn't make that a condition, did I?" he asked gently. "No, but you are letting yourself in for the toughest part of being a husband, and you're not even one. I mean, I'll be fat and cranky, and not able to do a lot of things, and..." "... and it's an exciting and beautiful part of life that I've missed out on," he interrupted her. "Don't think I'll be making a sacrifice." After a thoughtful pause, he spoke softly "You can't say you're in love with me, but you're willing to share my bed?" That made her blush, and she ducked her head against his chest as she spoke. "I hope that doesn't make me a slut. I like you a lot, Roland. You are so gentle and so thoughtful. I'm starved for affection, and I'm... I'm just plain, uh..." "Horny?" he asked. Her face was still down against his chest when she nodded. He raised her chin and initiated the next kiss himself. "I would be delighted to share my bed with you on any basis, Theresa. I am sure I am at least as horny as you are." That triggered another kiss. When that kiss ended, she pulled back and said "Where's your phone?" When the agent answered, she identified herself and said "Have a check and your copies of my lease ready in fifteen minutes. I'll be right over, and those people can have the apartment." She listened for a moment, then said "No, I don't want the other unit." After another pause, she said, more strongly "My lease is for the original unit. If you don't want me in that one, then the lease is void. You can't just move me to another one." After yet another pause, she said with anger "Do I need to get my lawyer into this?" After listening one last time, she said "See you in fifteen minutes." "I've always heard about how people take advantage of women alone," she said. "I'm becoming a believer. "You won't be alone any more. I'll go in there with you." "No! I can win this one on my own, and I want to do it. It will give me real pleasure." He raised his eyebrow at that, but he was both impressed and pleased to see the strength in her. As it turned out, she did fine on her own while he waited in the car. ------- Theresa offered no resistance to Roland's plea to move in that very day, and by dinner time she had the bare essentials in her new home. The sexual tension was evident in both of them, but it did not prevent a lot of light-hearted banter as they went about disrupting the bachelor existence that had been his for the last year plus. Theresa spent a lot of the day thinking. She usually pondered decisions for a long time, and decided carefully, yet she had just moved in with a man after being around him for less than two weeks. What was going on? She answered herself that she had really known Roland for a few years, and knew quite a bit about him. Another answer was that Betty had told her to pursue Roland. Betty was hardly wrong about anything. Did she love her new partner? That was the question that haunted her endlessly as she went about relocating, and she did not know how to answer it. Part of the problem was her preoccupation with her pregnancy, the divorce, and moving. Most of all, she was still consumed by her relationship with Julie and Terry. It was almost as if her relationship with Roland was engulfed by everything else in her life. Well, she had better start thinking about it because she was pretty sure she would be sleeping with him that night. At least, she damn sure hoped so. She could not help evaluating Roland, and inevitably, comparing him to Vince. In the looks department there was no comparison. Vince was outrageously handsome, while Roland's looks could best be described as manly and pleasant. He was noticeably leaner than when they had socialized years before. She thought perhaps he had turned to exercise to help cope with the divorce. She knew very little about his business, but he did not seem to worry about money, nor did he lack for anything, as far as she could tell. Vince's personality was characterized by his self-confidence, his aggressiveness, and his energy. Roland exuded more calmness and contentment. His intelligence was obvious, and he had a sense of humor that she found to be a pleasant change from Vince's more serious, driven demeanor. It was impossible not to speculate on what kind of lover Roland would be. Judging from the considerate, thoughtful way he treated her, she was looking forward to the tender, emotional sex that she had gotten too infrequently from Vince. Since there was still work to be done, she had to cut off that line of thinking. She would find out very soon, anyway. Roland suggested they go out for dinner, but Theresa was too weary from the busy day to enjoy it. When he blushingly admitted that there was little to eat in the house and that he did not cook much, they solved it by ordering in. She was about to take a shower to freshen up before the food came, but had a better idea. The talk over dinner was comfortable, as it always seemed to be with him, and he had a beer afterward. She was being extremely strict about nutrition and exercise, and would not go near alcohol. As he had several times before, he complimented her on her self-control and determination. "Roland, it is probably hard for you to understand my feelings about having more children: it's probably hard for anyone to understand. I know I am at a higher risk age, and I will do everything in my power to reduce that risk." They talked for quite a while longer, both of them uncertain how to approach the love-making they both wanted so badly. It was Theresa who finally took the initiative. "Why don't we go to the bedroom and pretend we have been married for a while. We'll undress and take a shower together. That will help you decide if you really want this," and she patted her belly, "in bed with you." "Sounds like a plan," he said, after catching his breath, "but I want you in bed no matter the tummy." It was not frantic or hurried, and it was not even particularly erotic. What it was was tender, relaxed, and very comfortable. As she struggled with the clasp of her bra, which was in the back, he matter-of-factly undid it for her. Of course, he cradled her breasts for a little afterward and planted a few light kisses on her shoulder, but there was no major interruption to their preparations. In the shower, he was very solicitous of her balance. It was apparent that he had never had a pregnant wife, but she would take his over-protectiveness every time. The guy was unbelievably sweet. Not too sweet do explore her body thoroughly, though. In bed, the gentleness and sweetness continued to show, but he also revealed his passionate side. Once again, she could not avoid comparisons with Vince, and it was eye-opening for her. Sex with Vince was about stimulation, excitement, and exhaustion. After having Roland bring her to three orgasms that were the equal of any in her life, she was able to identify the big difference. Roland did her with no thought but her pleasure, she was sure of it. With Vince, even satisfying her had been a competition of sorts: 'Wow, that felt great! But wait 'til you see what I'm going to do for you!' After the months of going without and suffering from her hormone-enhanced sex drive, Theresa was eager for anything he could give her. And he gave her a lot. While it never reached the screaming frenzy she so often achieved with Vince, it went on and on. She found herself amazed that Lee would have looked for someone else. The man was turning her inside out in gentle, wonderful little steps. If he was trying to convince she was right to move in, well, he passed that mark about ten minutes in. Time was hard for her to measure, given the feelings she was cycling through, but she thought it had been quite a while, and he had not yet entered her. She had knelt in the shower and given him a blow-job, over his objections. Other than that, it had all been for her. Fortunately, there was a convenient handle she could use to guide him to where he was supposed to be. Their first time was missionary, although she doubted if they would be doing any more of that until after the baby. Once again, he treated her as almost too delicate, obviously worried about harming the baby. When her thrusts back at him became almost frenzied, he got the idea and gave her the pounding she hungered for. He was the one who got up to fetch a rag and towel, but she got up right behind him, reminding him of the ever-present bladder problem. He backed out of the bathroom, but she did not want that. "If you can't take the intimacy, I want to find out right now, Roland." "Oh, I can take it. In fact, I want all of it you can handle." With that, he walked up to her and stroked her hair as she sat and peed. "I need to warn you," she told him, almost breaking up at his tenderness, "modesty gets lost somewhere in all the discomfort of pregnancy." In bed, ready for sleep, she instinctively turned her back to him and he spooned with her. She held his hand against her breast and forced herself not to think too much - not to ask all the questions about the future. This was a very good man, a wonderful man. She still could not believe what the day had brought, but she regretted none of it. Love and marriage possibilities could wait for another day. ------- Theresa's immediate concern the next day was telling Julie and Terry about her new living arrangement. They knew she was selling the house, but she feared how they would react to her suddenly moving in with Roland. He just kept doing things that raised him higher in her eyes, and he was the one that insisted that the kids come to the house and they would tell them together. Theresa called Julie, for whom travel of any kind was no longer much fun. She had to tell Julie she would be at Roland's house, and Julie agreed to bring Terry. The arrival of her children allowed Theresa to see a side of Roland that she had not yet seen. Belying his rather laid back manner, he took total charge of the little get-together and handled it so smoothly that both kids quickly felt the same comfort with him that she enjoyed. When the marriage question came up, he deferred to her, but with the clear indication that he wanted to respond. He explained that it was a moot question until after the divorce was finalized. He startled her a bit by telling them that it was definitely his desire, but that they had not even discussed it. "You have to remember," he said, "that our first kiss was yesterday." By the time the kids left, Roland had talked in detail about their jobs, about Terry's school, and of course, about Julie's baby. In the course of conversation, Theresa learned about his business, something they had not gotten around to discussing between the two of them. All in all, it went much better than she could have imagined. In the car on the way home, Julie asked Terry "Does it bother you that she seems so happy?" His head snapped around and he looked at her hard for several seconds. "Have I been that bad?" he asked. "Oh, don't worry. I was there, too. Part of me still wants to see her suffer some more, but it's like she is a different person now. Punishing her now seems kind of, um, pointless. Know what I mean?" "Yeah, I know what you mean. Still, all those years, all those fights, and the Center! I don't know if it will ever go away, Jules." "Probably not," she replied thoughtfully. "Just think, though, without all of that, you might never have met Ellie. Doesn't that make up for a lot?" "God, yes! Same goes for you and Glen, doesn't it. I guess you would have met him anyway, but you probably wouldn't have been married yet. And little Matt, there," and he patted her belly, "wouldn't have been almost here." "I keep telling you, it's Libby," she giggled. The giggle died, though, under another of the unending guilt attacks. Would she ever be able to think about her baby without remembering what she had done? ------- Three days after moving in with Roland, Theresa had her regular session with Julia. After the first thirty seconds when Theresa blurted out her new living arrangement, Julia was left wondering how a patient could knock her off balance so easily after all her years of practice - and not for the first time. Julia thought she had covered her reaction well, but Theresa caught it and actually giggled. In the process of chiding herself over her lack of composure, Julia realized the import of that giggle. It represented a breakthrough for Theresa. Levity or humor of any kind had been almost totally absent from the woman, at least when she was with Julia. The little smile and the sound that went with it qualified as a substantive mark of progress in her treatment. "Does Roland know you are seeing me?" Julia asked after a short period of fact-finding. Theresa's positive response meant that Julia could safely contact him without violating confidentiality. She very much wanted to talk to the man. It was not that she feared any bad motives or any danger. Theresa was just so fragile in so many ways that Julia needed to be aware of all the things affecting her life. And living with a man would certainly have a huge affect. The rest of the hour was spent examining Theresa's reasoning behind her move, and her feelings after the first few days. Julia was very interested to hear how much Theresa had taken Betty's advice to heart. "Are you in love with him?" "I would say I am getting there quickly," Theresa answered. "You have to understand: I am more than a little confused about love after the last year. I will tell you, I feel completely comfortable and at ease with Roland. More than I ever felt with Vince." "That's a good thing for your pregnancy," Julia commented. "That makes it all the better. I know it's a good thing for me." ------- "I could see how Terry felt about Theresa, and it was hard for me to understand." Roland was telling Julia about the meeting to inform Julie and Terry about their mother moving in with him. Julia had called Roland as Theresa walked out the door from her appointment and asked if he could come to her office over lunch hour. Her immediate assessment of her patient's new mate soared greatly when he asked if he could bring lunch. "This may sound strange coming from a shrink," Julia told him, "but the Theresa that generated those feelings in her children is not the same Theresa that moved in with you." "Was she really that bad, or were they over-reacting?" "Now you've asked something that I can't ethically answer. If things are going as well between you two as it seems, she will probably tell you." "Well, I hope so. They seem to be great kids, and I know their feelings hurt her a lot." "It's good that you realize that. Those feelings are the dominant factor in her life right now. I don't mean to downplay your importance to her, but I'm afraid you are doomed to second place for a while - maybe quite a while." "I can live with that." "I suspect you can. Do you plan to marry her?" "I want that. I don't think she is there yet." "Well, you have some time to decide. Can I tell Theresa we met?" "Certainly." Julia had never met Vince, but from what she knew of him, she felt that Theresa had definitely bettered herself with her new partner, and hopefully husband. Julia was very committed to keeping couples together, but Theresa had told of her impending divorce as a decision already made. It had not been a battle that was wise for Julia to engage in, given the severity of Theresa's other problems. ------- Theresa waited a whole week before asking for a little special pampering from Roland. Julie had told her how Glen rubbed lotion all over her every day, and she thought that was about the most loving thing she had ever heard of. From the way he seemed to worship her body, she thought Roland would be willing to do the same. Coming out of the shower before bedtime, Theresa carried a large towel which she spread on the bed, then lay down on her back in the center of the towel. She was still naked. Holding up the tube of anti-wrinkle creme, she asked timidly "Roland, do you think you could rub this on all my stretch spots?" A week of exposure to her body had only heightened his fascination and his desire. Of course he could! Her habit of baring herself for him had him completely captivated. The way she presented her body was so... so intimate. It drew him in. It was not just that she was beautiful, which she certainly was. It was the air of trust and contentment and a desire to please him that radiated from her naked flesh. Roland had thought he understood sex appeal, but Theresa presented a whole new definition. "That was great, but there really wasn't much to rub," Roland complained after he had worked lotion into the areas where she directed. "But it feels so huge to me," she answered. "Well, couldn't I rub some more places, just for fun?" "Really? I... I've got lots more places, and your hands feel wonderful on all of them," Theresa told him, hardly believing what he was asking. She told him where to find some regular body lotion and enjoyed a long, leisurely rubdown. She knew exactly why Julie had raved about it. ------- On the third night that Roland rubbed lotion on her, Theresa told him "This would be even more wonderful if you undressed, too." "But I... uh... well, I'll be hard." "I would hope so!" she said with a giggle. "I'd like to have something to do with my hand, too." From then on, Theresa enjoyed the same intimate daily attention that meant so much to her daughter. Because he did not have the pressure of going to work at night, Roland could take much more time about it. Before long, they were scheduling an hour or more before bedtime. Much of it was spent with him rubbing lotion on her, but a lot of it was just talking and sharing. It was while he rubbed her down that Theresa began telling Roland in detail about what had gone on with Vince and the children. Her sessions with Julia, while the confessions had been painful, had been very helpful. She was discovering that Roland was also a wonderful listener. He didn't condemn her, and it was obvious how much her cared about her feelings. She had started referring to the 'old Theresa' when she talked about her former self. One night, after describing some particularly nasty things she had done to Julie, she broke down and exclaimed "God, Old Theresa was a hateful bitch! How can you say you love me?" "Theresa, I don't want to be like a watchdog, or anything, but do I have your permission to let you know if you... if I see some of Old Theresa showing up?" He asked it very softly, almost fearfully. She just looked at him for many seconds before her eyes filled with tears. Then she rolled onto her side, bent her legs, and smacked herself loudly on her bare bottom. "If you ever see Old Theresa, you yank my panties right down and make me good and red right there!" The vehemence with which she said it left no doubt that she meant every word. He could tell that she carried a great fear of falling back into her old patterns. The idea of striking this woman, whom he considered his new-found treasure, frankly horrified him, and it took him a while to react. Theresa was still on her side facing away from him, sniffling softly, her hand resting on the spot on her bottom that she had slapped. When he got ahold of himself, Roland gently lifted her hand and placed a kiss right on the spot. Laying her hand atop her hip and keeping his mouth on the spot, he began caressing gently over the whole cheek that he had kissed. His kisses spread out to cover more of her cheek, and he kept it up until he felt her shiver a little. As he sensed the excitement starting to build in her, he let his hand drift down to the lower part of her ass cheeks and the tops of her thighs, still just caressing lightly. When he heard her breath catch, he snuggled up behind her with his legs bent to spoon against her. His cock was already hard and she eagerly lifted her leg to let it lay along her crack. Wrapping his arm around her to gently cradle a breast, he spoke softly into her ear. "The idea of ever striking you in any way makes me sick. I just couldn't do it. I promise you this: I will never do anything to make Old Theresa come out. I think that back then you just did what you had to to survive. I believe I'm living with the real Theresa, now, and I think she's completely wonderful." The next day, his rather expensive bedspread had to go to the cleaners for emergency stain removal. The passion that overtook them left no room for worrying about such trivia as stained bedclothes, or even covering up to stay warm. When exhaustion overtook them, he had dragged whatever he could reach over them to retain the warmth that their closely-entwined bodies were throwing off as they fell into a sweaty but contented slumber. Waking some time in the wee hours brought a momentary panic to Theresa. Her bladder demanded immediate relief but she was hopelessly tangled in bedspread. Her frantic scrabbling woke Roland rather quickly and he helped her get free. He could not restrain a laugh as she scampered to the bathroom, squealing in distress, her hand jammed into her crotch as if she could delay the flow. His laughter could have irritated her, but the relationship had progressed so nicely that she just knew he was not laughing at her, but at the situation. Once she felt the relief of her stream blasting into the bowl, the humor got to her, as well, and she almost fell off of the stool with laughter. By the time she finished and walked back into the bedroom, he had straightened things out. "Look!" He said with a chuckle, "Clean sheets!" Raising her arm, she dramatically sniffed at her pit and answered "Smelly bodies!" Almost pouncing on her, he pulled her into the bed and wrapped her in a hug, saying "Don't care!" He was just able to reach the bedside lamp, which had stayed on since early in the evening, and their lingering exhaustion kept them both asleep until well past his usual wake-up time. Before she drifted off again, Theresa had time to ponder what she was feeling about him. Every instinct cried out for her to declare her love for him right then. It was only her general emotional confusion that held her back. She had been honest when she told Julia she was not sure just what love was anymore. Roland, however, was creating a new and wonderful definition for her. It seemed like every day brought some thrilling new revelation. He accepted everything about her and seemed to revel in it. Because he didn't care a bit how she looked, she spent more time than ever on grooming. She also dressed carefully, but wore far less when they were alone than she was used to. Every peek at her body seemed to thrill him, and thus it thrilled her. Giving him the best possible peeks became her favorite game. Even her pregnancy problems were treated with humor and a kind of reverence. It was hard to disbelieve his claim that he was enjoying every minute. To be honest with herself and with him, she should declare her love right away, but... The last thought did not finish before sleep closed in. ------- Their little bedtime rubdown ritual became a key part of every day. With his ministrations, her gentle stimulation of him, and their increasingly open conversations, both could feel the bond between them growing stronger by the day. One night, he was sitting beside her in their usual positions. He had finished putting on lotion and was absent-mindedly playing with her pubic hair as they talked. That sort of constant fondling was becoming natural for them. "Would you like for me to shave it bald?" Theresa asked out of the blue. "Oh! Why do you ask?" "I, uh, know that Lee stays bare. Would it make good memories or painful memories if I shaved mine?" She was watching him closely for his reaction. Roland thought for quite a while before he answered. "Theresa, your body has nothing to do with Lee and any memories of her. In these few weeks I have forgotten all the pain. You have showed me what I always thought marriage should be, even if we're not married. Whatever you want to do with your pussy, I won't be able to get enough of it." Her eyes moistened instantly and she sat up and grabbed him around the neck. "I love you, Roland Comstock!" she declared in a broken voice, her first such proclamation. "I love you! If you meant what you told the kids about wanting to get married, let's do it the day I'm final." He had no words of response, but it was a long time before either of them got any sleep that night. ------- Late in February, Glen fell madly in love with another woman. Elizabeth (Libby) Voss had complete, total possession of her daddy's heart from the first time she squirmed her little self against Glen's chest. He was lying beside Julie on the hospital bed and she wearily handed the little bundle to him. Even barely cleaned up from birth, everyone could see that Libby was a miniature Julie, and he had no more defense than he had when Julie went after him. He had been with Julie every minute of the labor and delivery, managing not to faint by concentrating on his wife. As his little family lay squeezed onto the narrow bed, the guilt and loss of the past year were pushed way into the background by the wonder of new life. Things would certainly not get any easier, but one look at Libby and one whiff of her unique infant smell told him it was all worth it. Glen was still working the same shift, and he was still going to school, but he was taking a lighter load, as Julie had begged him to. For the first time, they were able to spend quite a bit of the day together. Sometimes, it was as simple as him holding Libby while he studied and Julie napped. After much discussion, Glen had taken the college money from the fund Theresa had set up. For Theresa, it had represented a breakthrough, and it had taken her many minutes to stop crying after they told her. The extra money went a long way toward easing the level of tension for the young couple. They quickly developed a little ritual when Glen was home at feeding time. He would sit on the couch and Julie would lay back against him as she nursed. It was dead time as far as him accomplishing anything, but he never gave that a thought. As the baby nursed, Glen would gently cradle the other breast. It was often too tender for the fondling he would like to do, but he was happy with the closeness it gave them. Julie made it a point to shed her bra before nursing, and often wore a robe that she could leave open. Ever since the weekend at the cabin in the fall, intimacy had been something they both worked for. With lots of input from Betty, Glen had tried to understand Julie's feelings about herself as she became larger and less agile. Although she suffered far less than many expectant mothers, the last few weeks seemed to take forever. Glen was able to wait on her constantly, and she was able to accept it gratefully. It was a time of real bonding. Concerned about their meager finances, Julie would probably have gone right from the store to the hospital. There is no doubt her condition got her a few sympathy sales toward the end, too. The extra college money was a compelling argument for her taking leave a little earlier. Glen was the one who told her boss that she was done two weeks before her due date. She made the obligatory fuss, but was secretly very pleased when he held his ground. Knowing how hard he had driven himself and spurred on by her guilt, she had taken every hour she could get, and had spent some extra time studying material on the lines she sold. After a couple of days of leave, she realized how tired she had been. He spent all the time he could with her the last couple of weeks. Sometimes, when he had to study, he would hold her head in his lap while she napped or watched TV. There really wasn't much more she wanted to do, and she was glad for every minute. Pregnancy, birth, and caring for a newborn can demolish a marriage or fuse a couple into a stronger entity. Because of his own family, Glen had a very strong idea of what a couple should be like. Despite his lingering guilt and feelings of unworthiness, he made it his responsibility to build the relationship. Julie responded gratefully and enthusiastically. To her, it was all new, but it was what she had dreamt of when she forced the marriage. With a newborn, it's all about inputs and outputs and demands for one or the other. The unrelenting repetitions can wear the parents down, particularly when they are already busy. Here, youth and energy were on their side. Having minimal responsibility for maintaining a household also helped a good deal. Betty was more than anxious to care for Libby. She realized, however, that while Julie was still on leave, it would be best for the mother to spend every possible minute with her baby. Grandmother would get her chances when mama went back to work. Over some objections from Julie, Betty began doing many of the cleaning tasks for the apartment, leaving Julie less tired for baby care. Even after living with them for eight months, Julie was still brought to tears by the little kindnesses the Vosses did for her so naturally - seemingly by instinct. Ellie could not get enough time with Libby, and Julie joked with her brother about how much Ellie loved babies, and was he ready for a big family. Marty, too, quickly learned to hold his niece and eagerly took his turn when she was awake. As much as Glen's family was thrilled with the baby, it was nothing compared to Theresa's reaction. If possible, she would have moved into the apartment with Julie and Glen. She brought Roland over to visit so often that he started bringing supper from a caterer he used for his business. Betty watched Roland very closely around the baby, and was pleased to see the genuine excitement on his face. Her friend Theresa had found a perfect husband and a perfect father for her new children. Betty hoped that Libby's arrival would be the event that strengthened her son's marriage. The young couple had seemed so happy lately, but she could still sense that there was something missing - or maybe something in the way. Could it be Julie's secret of getting pregnant on purpose? ------- Chapter 17 Libby's birth presented one troublesome dilemma for Theresa: should she let Vince know? He had made it perfectly clear that he had written them all out of his life, but should she be bound by that? It was his grandchild, and she did not want to be seen as the same vengeful person he was. At Christmas, she had decided to send him a gift. It was an honest way of saying that she did not hate him. The birth of his first grandchild, even if he chose to ignore it, was something he should be informed of. Her solution was to get a nice birth announcement card and fill in the information about Libby. She did not write anything extra, and in fact did not even sign the card. Without really thinking about it, she put Roland's house, now their house, as the return address. When Vince opened the card and read it, he had to sit down. For some reason, that bit of news broke through the armor of martyrdom and forced indifference that protected his emotions. Normally, he was very fastidious about his apartment, never leaving anything lying about, but always putting things away or disposing of them. For all of her organizational skills, Lee was not nearly as tidy, and it was a subject of good-natured teasing between the two. The birth announcement did not get put away, probably because of his mental turmoil. It lay on the kitchen counter, envelope and all. Lee came over that very night, noticing immediately that all was not right with Vince. She knew better than to ask what the trouble was, his answer always being that everything was fine. They had been together long enough for her to under-react and just wait him out. Because it was unusual, she saw the birth announcement almost immediately. After reading it, she idly picked up the envelope, and was shocked to see the return address, which she recognized as Roland's. She could think of no reason why the announcement was mailed from Roland's house. He was not connected to Theresa's daughter at all - unless... No! That was too far-fetched to consider. Roland and Theresa? But how? Could Theresa have gone after him for revenge? But she was older than Roland, and pregnant, for God's sake! At that thought, an icy chill grabbed at Lee's heart. She did not have to feign illness to beg off for the evening and leave. One of the biggest holes in her marriage to Roland had been their disagreement over children. He had gone along with her refusal to have any, but she had always known how badly he wanted a family. Despite the minimal evidence, Lee's well-honed intuition told her that Vince's ex and her ex might now be a couple. She knew without a doubt that if true, it would be for the long haul. It was a minor miracle that she successfully made the short trip home. Even driven, highly-motivated people can still have emotional dreams and fantasies. As unrealistic as it was, Lee harbored a fantasy of reuniting with Roland. An accidental reading of a return address threatened to demolish that dream, and the prospect terrified her more than she could imagine. Part of the fantasy had been that she still held some level of control - she could get him back. Irrevocable loss of control affected her just as much as it had Vince, and even her lingering illusion of control was threatened. Unbeknownst to each other, both Lee and Vince were simultaneously wiping out their meager supplies of hard liquor that night. They should have been able to comfort each other, but that was not the nature of their relationship. Lee had no illusions about what kind of person Vince was. As much as she could admire him physically, professionally, and sexually, she knew she could never live with him. The constant, intense battles that Theresa had described to her would have been her lot, and that was not her view of marriage. Ever since her divorce, Lee had been less and less able to contain her emotions with the same rigid control that managed her professional life. Before, her professional life WAS her life, or at least that was her belief. Since breaking up with Roland, loneliness, regret, and sexual frustration had made it impossible to continue the fiction of the steely, impervious superwoman. At the top of her profession, with a career envied by every woman who knew her, she was feeling more and more empty and unfulfilled. Later, she would blame it on much more alcohol than she usually imbibed. Whatever the excuse, Lee cried that night, hard and long. Even right after the divorce, there had been no tears, perhaps because she held onto the illusion of control, of getting Roland back again. Suspecting that Roland now had another woman, a woman she knew to be a formidable adversary, left Lee no more room for illusion. There was just a big hole, and it hurt deeply. ------- At the same time that Lee and Vince were both reeling from the dissolution of their worlds, Glen and Julie were celebrating their new life as parents. Theresa had mailed the birth announcement to Vince on the day after Libby was born, and he got it the next day. In the modern fashion, Julie had spent just one night in the hospital. Glen had arranged to miss all of his classes and had swapped some nights of work so he could spend three full days with her and the baby when they came home. Julie was more than happy for his presence. As thrilled as she way over her new daughter, and as well as everything had gone, it was still hard to recover from what her body had gone through. Between Glen, Betty, and Ellie, she felt completely pampered. Most of the time that Roland was at work, Theresa spent at the Voss home, also. On the night that Vince was thrown onto the edge of depression by the birth announcement and Lee was left nearly in despair over her suspicions about Theresa and Roland, Julie and Glen were enjoying another high point in their marriage. Her first night at home, Julie was barely able to get to the bathroom by herself, and only exerted herself to feed and change Libby. The second night, she started to feel the need to freshen up. She happened to mention her intentions to Glen, and he sprang into action. Absolutely insisting that she stay sitting, he ran a bath for her, then came back and started helping her undress. She gave him a concerned look and was about to say something when he put a finger on her lips. "Now, I know you would never say anything to me, your loving husband, about how you look too awful for me to see you naked. You would never say that, would you?" "But..." she started again, but he cut her off the same way. "I mean, you know your body just came through the biggest trauma it can have, so you wouldn't be afraid to have me see it, would you?" "Oh, Honey... !" Once more he stopped her gently. "Good! I'm glad I don't have to deal with any nonsense like that." He finally got the reaction he was hoping for when she gave a little giggle and held up her arms so he could pull off her sweater. He had turned up the heat, and the bedroom was small enough so the heat from the tub filling in the adjacent bathroom warmed it noticeably. While he knelt in front of her and unfastened her skirt, she braced herself on his shoulders. As he reached up to pull down her panties, she had to issue one more protest. "Oooh, I'm awfully ripe!" He ignored her and made a show of helping her to the tub. For over half an hour, he sat on the floor by the tub and they just talked while she soaked. When the water cooled, he ran more; he brought her a drink and a treat; he helped her to the toilet part way through. His careful drying with one of the luxurious gift towels from her mother made her feel pampered. When he just wrapped it around her when she was dry and led her toward the bed, she was puzzled until she saw another towel laid out as it had been for all of the pre-natal rubdowns. "But I don't have to worry about stretch marks anymore," she told him. "Okay, so now I'll do it just for the fun of it," he answered. Carried away by the welling emotion, she turned to give him a vigorous hug, ending up wincing from over-extending herself. She was groaning softly when he helped her lie down on her stomach. Her backside was very well lotioned and massaged, and he had been lightly caressing her bottom for a few minutes when she spoke. "You done?" "Only with one side." "But..." "Let's see," he said in mock thoughtfulness, "we already took care of the nonsense about mushy tummy, swollen boobs, and such. I guess there's no problem with me doing the front side, is there?" Before she delivered, Julie seemed to have no concerns about Glen seeing or touching her body. Now, however, she was strangely shy. Not too shy to want the attention, though, and she rolled over so he could put lotion on her front. "Hey, I done good! No stretch marks!" he exclaimed as he scrutinized her tummy from inches away. He finished his examination by blowing on her, causing her to flinch and giggle. While he rubbed the lotion on, he kissed her, and before long she was returning the kisses with fervor. When he finally capped the lotion, she pulled him towards herself and unfastened his jeans. "Honey, you don't have to..." he protested. "Can't I have some fun? You had yours." He didn't protest any more. Perhaps because of the strength of her personality, post-partum depression would not have been a threat to Julie. Whether it was or not, reestablishing the intimacy they had achieved before Libby's birth was an excellent preventative. Letting her know that she was not just a new mother, but a treasured wife and a desirable lover had a great effect on Julie's moods. ------- The day after discovering the stray birth announcement, Lee was completely useless at work. After her crying jag, she had laid awake most of the night, arguing with herself over whether her suspicions were silly. By mid-morning, she cancelled a meeting and drove to Roland's office, having no idea whether he would even be there. His long-time secretary had little love for Lee, knowing how broken up he had been after the divorce. "Would you just tell him I'm here?" Lee asked, trying to keep her voice neutral and steady. Weighing her personal allegiance versus her secretarial responsibility, the woman reluctantly went into his office, throwing Lee her most disapproving look. "Lee? Here?" Rolaand exclaimed. They had seen each other only briefly and seldom. All of their interactions had been over the phone or by email. He stood to greet his ex as she entered and took a seat. "Roland, I got a birth announcement about Theresa's granddaughter from your address, and not in your handwriting." Pausing to search her face, Roland answered "Yes, we are living together, now." Even though she expected the answer, it still hit Lee like a physical blow. Her face flushed and it took her a moment to regain the power of speech. "Living with you... as in permanently?" she asked, her voice at only half normal volume. "Very permanently. We are going to marry as soon as her divorce is final." Retaining composure took second place to simply breathing for Lee, and it was impossible for Roland to miss her reaction. She was unable to prevent tears from pooling in her eyes. Still feeling genuine tenderness for her, he tried to speak gently as he told her "Lee, there was never any chance of us reuniting. I think I have always made that clear, haven't I? I never led you on, did I?" "N... no. You never did," she was finally able to breathe out. There was total silence for half a minute before she stood. "Congratulations, Roland. You will get the family you always wanted." Uncharacteristically unable to face him, she faced the door and said. "I guess I've apologized enough, now. You will always be the biggest mistake of my life." "Lee, we would never have made it for the long haul, anyway," he told her, not really planning to open that line of discussion. She spun around and stared at him open-mouthed. "Our marriage commitment just meant different things to each of us. I believe you loved me as much as you could. It's just that your career and your, uh, needs are ahead of everything else for you." Her jaw dropped open at the boldness and the sting of his words. The Roland she thought she knew would never have said anything like that. "Is... is that really what you think of me?" she asked with an unavoidable quaver. "Lee, I should not have said that. Let's not start any accusations now. I'm happier that I have been since... well, since. The anger is disappearing. I will always be have love for you, just as Theresa will have for Vince. But we are separate people now, with separate lives." She looked so absolutely miserable that he tried to find some way to change the subject. "Do you think you and Vince will end up marrying?" It was a terrible strategy, as she turned and hurried from his office. ------- Lee could not understand why the news about Roland and Theresa had hit her so hard. She had pled illness and missed the remainder of the day at work. At home, she alternated between sitting morosely in a chair and pacing the floor in frustration. Late in the afternoon, the phone rang. Her inclination was to let it ring over, but she saw the name 'Comstock' on the Caller ID and answered it. It was Theresa, and after the greetings, Theresa said "Lee, please don't think I went out after Roland. Honestly, we met accidentally at the mall, and, well, things just picked up from there. Besides, revenge would be a poor reason to pick a partner." "Oh, I never thought that you did." "Roland said the news, um, seemed to hit you rather hard," Theresa said gently. "Oh, I don't think..." Lee started her usual tough rebuttal, but stopped short. "I guess there's no point trying to put up a front for you, is there, Theresa? Yeah, I was not doing well." "I'm guessing you always regretted the divorce, huh?" Theresa said, more as a statement than a question. "You know, Roland feels terrible about the way you left his office earlier. He didn't mean to say anything hurtful." "He never would," Lee said almost wistfully. "I think he was trying to say something that would be positive for me. He had just laid some heavy stuff on me. He doesn't really understand about Vince." "So you have no intention of marrying Vince?" "You of all people should know better than that," Lee said with a snort. "In fact, thank you for warning me about him. I can believe everything you said about what happened with your family. Roland must be about as opposite from Vince as can be." "Oh, yes!" Theresa enthused, "and it's just what I needed. Are, uh, you going to be OK?" "Oh, sure... I... Oh, what the Hell?" Lee verbally threw her hands up in resignation. "Theresa, in a strange way, you know things about me that no one else knows. I trust you to keep a secret. I am going to take a job across country. No one else knows this, even the company that offered me the job." "But I thought you were the rising star at the company!" "Well, them not giving me a promotion I obviously deserve right away has me concerned. Plus, with the business with Roland, you, and Vince, I feel like I need a fresh start. Uh, you won't say anything, will you?" "Of course not. Why did you tell me and no one else?" Theresa asked. "Hmmm!" Lee mused aloud. "I know we're different and we could easily be enemies. But in some strange way, I think you understand me better than anyone. You have remade yourself - remade your whole life. For the first time, I am feeling like I may need to do that." There was a long silence from both women before Lee spoke again. "You probably realize what a prize you're getting in Roland." "You bet I do," Theresa enthused. "In fact, I don't understand how..." Her embarrassment could be heard as she stopped short. "You mean how I could screw around on him? I'm afraid what he said this morning was painfully true," Lee explained. "I've been thinking about that all afternoon, and that's why I've decided to take that new job. Right now, I don't like what I am very much." "Well, I've been there, as you know," Theresa said. "Things are turning out far better for me than I could have dreamed. I hope they do for you, too." "It looks like you're getting your kids back little by little, and I know that's the thing you want the most. You've also got the thing I want the most..." "I'm sorry," Theresa interjected. "No, no! You don't need to be sorry. It's my fault," Lee assured her. "I'm only now really understanding how much I hurt him. It makes me feel good that he found you. You're just what he needs to get over the pain I caused him." ------- The phone call from Theresa had been emotional, but uplifting in a way. The unbelievable things was that Lee had blurted out her intention to take the out-of-town job without having 'formally' decided beforehand. In the middle of the conversation, it just became clear that it was the right move. With serious misgivings about her standing in the company, the threat of encountering Roland and Theresa ever present, and a general feeling that she needed a fresh start, the city that had seemed like her kingdom not so long before was feeling very uncomfortable. The feeling that she wanted to be somewhere else became very strong. The only certain positive factor had been Vince, and he was two-timing her. Even though she was the one who cautioned against monogamy, she could not avoid a feeling of betrayal. When she realized that it was just a shadow of what she had brought on Roland, she had another bout of tears. The company that was recruiting her had set a deadline for a decision, and it was approaching rapidly. Gender was obviously not a problem for them. The offer meant a move of a thousand miles, but was that such a bad thing? If all that was holding her in town was Vince, was it worth the risk of dead-ending her career? Was it worth the constant reminder of what she had thrown away in Roland? Worse yet, Vince himself was becoming a reminder because of his marriage to Theresa. There had been a noticeable drop-off in her desire to be with him. Part of Lee could not believe that she had used such 'soft' criteria to make such a critical career decision. But having made the decision, and the implied commitment to changing her life that went with it, she was energized. Telling Vince would not be easy, but she knew it had to be done right away: right after she called and accepted the offer. To her own surprise, Lee felt some perverse satisfaction about telling Vince that she was moving away. She had figured out that Claire was a move in the control competition between them. She also understood that she herself had triggered that move. Although she regretted that things had devolved into such a competition, she understood that it was probably inevitable. If there had to be a battle, at least she had won. Vince's reactions could probably have been anticipated if she had thought about it. When told about Theresa and Roland, he gave her the same blank look that had greeted Theresa at every mention of the children, before the divorce. It was as if she was talking about some strangers. The offer of the new job was one thing she had never told him about. Since they worked for the same company, she did not think it was fair to burden him with that potential conflict of interest. It was one of many things about their relationship that she had worked very hard to keep within the spirit of non-fraternization. He did a marvelous job of appearing pleased for her when she told him. Quite probably, he was still suffering some shock about Theresa, and that may have dulled his reaction. Lee had never once been exposed to his anger, and this was no exception. They talked quite naturally about all of the details for a long time. The reaction set in when they went to bed. Lee was energized and horny, and was very much looking forward to a vigorous session. Vince, however, was totally unable to get it up. She had rejected him: he was once again the aggrieved party. Because of her rejection, he could not generate any desire for her. To say she was surprised would be a gross understatement. Never could she have expected such a reaction from him, although analyzing it later and talking to Theresa again made it seem completely understandable. It created about the most awkward situation imaginable between two people who were together only because of their high-powered libidos. Lee chose the high road - the gentle reaction. She actually stayed the night, just sleeping with him to provide comfort. A flash of insight showed what he must be feeling about the news. His self-centered mind would assume that she was deserting him. In the very early morning, when she had to get home to prepare for her day, she did not even try to arouse him. She knew for a certainty that they would never be together again except at work. ------- A decision on the new EVP had dragged on for far longer than necessary, in Lee's opinion. She feared that meant she would not get it. There was no rational reason that she should not be chosen, based on capabilities and performance. That meant, in her mind, that gender bias was getting in the way. Of course, there was no way to verify that, but she trusted her instincts. "Damn!" was all her boss could say when she handed him her resignation letter. He picked up the phone and got immediate access to the president's office. "Lee," the president said, "how can you leave now? You must know you are being considered for the EVP position." "Yes, but I did not get it," she replied. "Well, it hasn't been decided yet," the president objected. "The only reason I have not already been appointed," Lee explained, "must be gender bias. At least some in authority are objecting because I am female. By every other criterion, I was a shoo-in." "Give us two days and we'll settle it," the president told her. "No, I'm sorry," she answered. "If there was that much disagreement, it means that I would have very divided support if I got the job. My new company has no such problem with female executives." "Believe me, I had no desire to leave here. I have given my jobs here all I have, and I can move on knowing the company has gotten full value out of me. I just don't happen to think my career has peaked yet, but your indecision tells me I have reached my limit here. One thing I haven't heard you say is that my gender was not an issue. You can't say that, can you?" The president stood as he answered. "No, I cannot say that. I can honestly say it was not an issue with me, but there are others..." Without saying any more, they shook hands, and that phase of her life was over. ------- It would not be a good idea to be seeing a shrink when she started her new job, but Lee felt a real need for someone to talk to. The news about Theresa and Roland had affected her more than any event in her life, other than her divorce. In a sense, it was the final phase of her divorce, eliminating any infinitesimal possibility of reuniting. Hopefully, it did not mean she was losing her edge. It would not do to enter her new position without the energy and drive that had earned it for her. The night she resigned, she found herself once again pacing her family room, unable to sit for more than a few minutes. With the pacing came a new feeling for her - loneliness. The few sex partners she had been with since the divorce had drifted away once she focused on Vince. A couple of them had been nice guys with whom she could talk if the need arose. When she thought of those former partners, it shook her up to realize that she was thinking of them for talk, not sex. It shook her up even more when she did not feel any need for sex. The tension had not morphed into horniness as it always had before. Without the sexual urge, there was just an empty feeling, and she did not like it at all. After casting about for some time for someone she could talk to, she ended up calling Theresa. "Theresa, I won't keep you long. I don't want to upset anything between you and Roland. I... I... you must have seen someone through all of this, haven't you?" "Seen someone?" "Yes. A therapist? A shrink?" "Oh, of course. Yes, I certainly have. She's marvelous. Would you like her number?" Lee asked. "I... I'll only be around a few more weeks, but yes, I would like her number." Theresa gave her Julia's information, then said "Lee, I sense that you need someone to talk to right now." "Oh, I'm all right. It's just..." "I'll be over in a few minutes." Theresa managed to astonish Lee with that statement. "No! No! Don't do that. If... if you feel like talking, let me pick you up and we'll go for coffee. Um, what will Roland think." "I think he will be happy that I am helping you out. He doesn't hate you, you know." The two women, in some ways the strangest of friends, spent almost two hours chatting. They ended up at a nice club Lee had frequented. Theresa scrupulously drank only diet soda, but did indulge in some tasty appetizers. "You really look good pregnant," Lee exclaimed during a lull in their chat. "Well, thank you. It's hard to feel attractive with a belly sticking farther out all the time, and boobs a bra size bigger, and more aches and pains than I can count." "But you're happy anyway?" "Absolutely!" Theresa exclaimed with feeling. "Oh, the farther along I get, the more I want it to be over, but it is still a wonderful experience." She opened her mouth as if to ask a question, but said nothing. Lee caught the almost-question and knew just what it would have been. "Maybe I'm missing something, Theresa. I read about women panicking because their biological clock is running down, but I've never felt that way. I don't dislike children, it's just that... Did Roland tell you what he said to me today?" Lee asked after stumbling over her previous thought. "No, he didn't say much except that you stopped in, you were upset, and he said something wrong that made you leave in a hurry." "He told me that our marriage commitment meant different things to the two of us, and we would never have made it long term. No one has ever said anything that hurt me that much." "I'm sure he didn't say it to hurt you." "Of course not. He was actually trying to soften the shock of knowing there was really no chance of getting him back." "You mean you still thought there might be a chance?" Theresa asked, her surprise obvious. "Yup, the hard-nosed executive bitch had her dream. I think I'm like Vince, thinking I can control everything. If I admitted Roland was really gone, I would be admitting loss of control." "Your shrink friend will probably have a field day with me," Lee said after ordering another drink. "Sometimes I think maybe I cheated on him to make him divorce me." "WHAT?" "I knew I wasn't being fair to him about a family. He never put any pressure on me, but I saw that way he looked at fathers with their children. He wanted it far more than he ever let on to me." "Right now, he's like a kid at Christmas time," Theresa observed. "Even the unpleasant things about pregnancy: he seems to be eating them up." "Just think of the pampering I missed out on," Lee said softly. "But it wouldn't have been a happy thing for you," Theresa reminded her. "You have to be true to yourself, too." "So, you agree with what he told me today?" Lee asked. "It's not my place to agree or disagree. I'm just here to help you feel better if I can." "See, that's what I can't figure out," Lee exclaimed. "When I came to see you after you told Vince about the divorce, you were much kinder than I deserved. How could you spend twenty years living with Vince?" "The kids have this theory that he was so strong that he shaped me into what he needed in a wife. I've never thought of myself as a weak person, but their idea makes a lot of sense. It also makes me ashamed." "Hmmm. Well, if I did destroy my marriage on purpose, then the reason was so Roland could find someone like you. You're just what he needs." Lee raised her drink as a toast to Theresa as she said it. Through her last few weeks before the move, Lee had the most extraordinary experience of her adult life: she had no sex of any kind, even with herself. During a time of high tension and much activity, that was unheard of for her. The lack of sex did not disturb her much, but the absence of her longing for it bothered her a great deal. ------- A growing hatred had replaced the love Vince once had for Theresa. In his more honest introspective moments, he acknowledged two big mistakes he had made. The first was the sex scene in the kitchen where Theresa pretended she was Julie, and Julie had caught them. The other was giving in to Lee in the hot tub. Theresa had been responsible for both of his mistakes. Like Eve in the garden, she had lured him into the sex play. Her practically cutting him off from sex had left him helpless to Lee's seduction. Now, Theresa seemed to have hit the jackpot while he was out of chips. From what little he knew, she had restored relationships with the children. From his mother, he had heard that Julie and Glen were with Theresa when she visited her family. Vince would never have believed that could happen. He knew that Terry was living at the Voss home and assumed Theresa was seeing him at least occasionally. The latest news, that Theresa was going to marry Roland, meant that she was once again in a secure situation. Instinctively, Vince knew that Roland was a man Theresa could be happy with, and it galled him. He was at the point where he could no longer deny his own unhappiness. It was all her fault, she was happy, he was not, and it was a completely unfair situation. Self-pity really had no place in Vince's psyche: one who is in control has no need for it. Instead, the pity showed up as anger. The loneliness, however, had no disguise, and when Lee walked out after his humiliating sexual failure, it descended on him like a cloud. The fact that he would never again have sex with her was bad enough. What was just as bad for him was that she had been comforting him, just as she had done after the divorce announcement. In his competitive view of the sexual relationship, she had won the last round, and he had no chance to recoup. All of his work to hook up with Claire had been for naught. Because of his strong personal sense of honor, Vince had never shared anything about his marriage with his closest friends, and certainly not with his family. Only rarely had he disclosed anything to Theresa about his feelings: for one who was in control, feelings were not something to be revealed or shared. In his whole life, there had never been anyone with whom he had shared except at the surface or external level. After the announcement of Lee's departure, he was at the point of his greatest need for support from another person, but there was no one. The past year had been characterized by people leaving him: Terry, Julie, Theresa, and now Lee. All of the departures had happened without his approval or permission, and he had been helpless to stop them. A tendril of doubt began tickling at the edges of his ego. Was there any possibility that he had done something to drive them away? Were the accusations made by his ex-wife even a little bit true? Regardless of the body blows he had taken, Vince was still too strong for that kind of admission. His work had been his refuge and his restoration whenever negative things had happened in the past. Once again he threw himself fully into his job. He had a reasonable shot at the position Lee was leaving, and he would mount a vigorous campaign for it. Learning every possible fact that could help him in his quest would more than fill in the empty hours. Lee would be the ideal source for that information, but that was the one place he could not allow himself to go. Work would once again take care of any weakness attacking his mind. That still left one big problem: his sex drive. Unlike Lee, for whom it seemed to have temporarily dried up, Vince awoke from his night of humiliation almost desperate for a chance to prove that he still had it. For the first time in his very ethical career, he scheduled a trip that was driven more by personal need than by valid business purposes. There was always work he could do at the site, but Claire was the real reason he needed to be there. Fortunately, there was another of her husband's constant trips scheduled, so the fit was perfect. ------- Theresa would have agreed wholeheartedly with Vince's angry assessment that she had hit the jackpot. After twenty years of marriage and two children, she could not believe how much like a teenager she felt when she was around Roland. Vince had appreciated her beauty and told her so often. Roland, however, was enthralled with her body, swelling belly and all. And it was not just how she looked that fascinated him. He wanted to know about every little thing that happened to her; that bothered her. Pregnancy and childbirth had become the most interesting topics in his world. The years of wishing and hoping were being rewarded, and he was almost as giddy as Theresa. Unlike most teenagers, they were able to act mature and circumspect in public, but their feelings for each other were obvious to any observer. At home, decorum counted for nothing, and they could not keep their hands off of each other. Theresa began stopping at his office on her way to and from the Voss's, and quickly became fast friends with his dozen or so employees. All of them had seen the anguish of his past two years, and were relieved to have back the boss they had come to work for. The morning after Theresa's long chat with Lee, Roland was very late for work. Neither of them felt at all like sleeping when she got home, and the massage session stretched to well over two hours. Even more than when she had agreed to marry him, the disclosure to their exes brought a finality to their previous married lives. They were able to talk about their marriages more openly than ever before. The looking back was not nostalgia, but more of a burial. The last possible impediment to committing totally to each other was gone. Even before their wedding, they now felt like a real, independent couple. Long after the lotion was applied everywhere, he kept touching and caressing, and she grasped his penis for nearly the whole time. Her bladder forced one interruption, and when she returned, she pushed him onto his back and with a great deal of effort, she straddled him. "Isn't that awfully hard for you?" he asked. "Yes, it's extremely hard, and I know just what to do about it," she giggled at her double entendre. She proved her words by impaling herself on him. Her extra weight and awkward balance made moving up and down on him very difficult, so she just rocked back and forth. The feelings for him were exquisite, but not so exciting as to make him come. He put both hands on her belly as she moved. "You love her already, don't you?" she asked. An ultrasound had told them that it was Gina who was due. Both of them thought that was great, especially since Gina's niece, Libby was so close to the same age. There was a very good chance the girls would look a lot alike, and hopefully they would become great friends. "I can't wait. I'm as anxious as you." "Huh, uh! One day carrying her around like this would change your mind real fast," she teased him. Every since the ultrasound, the baby had been 'her' or 'Gina', not just 'the baby'. "Hey, if that's what it took to have a family, I'd do it," he proclaimed. The sincerity in his eyes was so overwhelming that her eyes started to leak. Leaning forward to try to kiss him did not work, so with a little growl of frustration, she began pumping up and down. It amazed him because of the effort it took, but she looked absolutely determined. Grabbing her hips, he helped her as much as he could, not even trying to talk her out of it. Nearly an hour of gentle stimulation and several minutes within her had him wexll along, and he was able to let loose before she collapsed. When he recovered enough to lay her over on her side, they were both sweaty. That just gave him another excuse to touch her all over as he used a washcloth and towel to freshen her up. The look of adoration she gave him was like nothing he had ever experienced before. They talked for another hour or more, and then Theresa got him hard again and turned her back to him. From behind was becoming the best position because of her condition. They both missed kissing and looking in each other's eyes during intercourse, but those were the only drawbacks. Another position that worked well was with her on her back, their bodies in a 'T', and their legs entwined. In that formation, her clit was in easy reach, and they both enjoyed the multiple comes he could give her on the way to his own. It may have been due to hormones, or maybe the discovery of the more tender loving sex with Roland. For whatever reason, Theresa was absolutely insatiable, and a day without was a rarity. Nor did she feel the need to apologize for her ardor, since he made it clear that it was a very good thing, indeed. Both had been wed to highly sexed spouses, but neither had had more frequent or more satisfying loving than they now shared. ------- Claire had upstaged him on their first encounter by the way she dropped her coat and chided him for being dressed. Well, that was not going to happen again! With only a sample of one to go on, he made the assumption that she was very punctual, and five minutes before her scheduled arrival time, he was naked. As the hour approached, he started stroking himself, wanting to be at full erection when he greeted her. He would win that round for sure. She was only a couple of minutes late, and his cock was vibrating with anticipation as he checked the peephole to make sure it was her. When she stepped past the door and saw him, her eyes dropped immediately to his rampant prick, and the flush that overtook her face gave him the sense of triumph that he had sought. He had won that round of the competition. His victory was short-lived, however. Another woman stepped in behind Claire and stood staring at his cock in utter shock. "This is my kid sister Sylvia," Claire managed to get out. She... she needs it just as badly as I do, so I brought her along to help wear you out." Sylvia looked a good ten years younger than Claire. Her face was prettier than Claire's, but a little pudgy. With a coat on, there was not much else he could tell about her, except for nicely turned feet, ankles, and lower legs. This was every man's dream: two women at once! Vince should have been ready to come on the spot. He already knew that Claire was his sexual equal, and Sylvia looked to be more desirable. But rather than getting more aroused, he wilted within a few seconds. Recovering from his initial shock, he scurried to the bathroom and donned a robe. As he left the entryway, he could see tears springing to Sylvia's eyes. As he entered the bathroom, he heard her yell at Claire "See, I told you this was a bad idea!" The sound of the door slamming followed. "What the Hell was that about?" an irate Claire almost screamed at him. "You made her feel awful! She was down on herself already, and now... !" Vince was poised to light into her in the way he and Theresa had always battled, but something stopped him. Instead, he asked sarcastically "Did you think I was just an available cock that you could give out to your friends and relatives as you chose?" "But I thought every man dreamed about two women!" she said, still in a raised voice. "Of course we do. But I'd like some say in who I go to bed with. I'm not into picking up women off the street." He felt a little guilty at that statement, knowing that was not the real reason for his upset. It was the fact that he had nothing to do with setting up the get-together with Sylvia that drained the blood from his member. He was not at all in control of the situation. "But she's not off the street! She's my sister!" Claire's voice rose even higher, and he could see moisture puddling in the corners of her eyes. "She's a very nice person. She's very sexy, just like me. She's been hurt badly, and I wanted her to have some of your good loving. Now she feels even worse about herself. She thinks you found her repulsive!" "God, how could she think that from ten seconds in the room?" he demanded, his own voice rising. "Well, you went soft and you ran away! What else was she supposed to think?" "Maybe that I was surprised and embarrassed, huh? Ever think of that?" "Embarrassed? You?" she scoffed. The two of them just stared at each other for several seconds before he spoke. "Do you think of your husband that way: just a cock that should be ready when you need it? Maybe that's why you're not getting any at home." "Fuck you!" she shouted, then turned on her heel and walked out. He was mentally kicking himself around for his last remark. It was not like him to just blurt out what he was thinking, except when he had fought with Theresa or Julie. The situation could probably have been salvaged with a little cool. Now, he had traveled all this way, even cheated the company, and he wouldn't even get his rocks off. Trying to analyze his own actions, all he could come up with was that Sylvia's unannounced appearance had made him very uncomfortable. His self-analysis had never been honest enough to see his overriding need for control for what it was. Vince's pride had made masturbation something that he avoided as a desperation alternative. Living with Theresa, he had almost forgotten how to jerk off: there was no need to do it. The same was true with Lee. It had only been five days since his last ever time with Lee, but he was really feeling the urge. Some of the need was from the anticipation built up for this trip. Some if it was because of the shaky outlook for his future sex life. For an uncertain amount of time, he sat staring at the blank screen of the TV, which was off. In some sort of a defensive reaction, his mind was not focused on anything in particular. It was as if allowing any reality to intrude right then would have given him thoughts that he had forbidden to himself. Such things as guilt and self-doubt might have tried to infiltrate. Vince Menconi did not have to deal with such things, ever! Eventually, images began to intrude on his consciousness. The first was of Lee, stalking naked across the hot tub toward him on the very first night of his adultery. That was the first of many different views of Lee, always naked, always sexy. Almost without him realizing it, the images were no longer of Lee, but of Theresa. First, she was walking from the bathroom, crotch hairless for the first time, just after his return from his fall with Lee. Next, she was being humiliated by Julie in front of Glen. There followed seemingly thousands of impressions, the erotic memories of twenty years with a beautiful woman. One that seemed to linger for a long time was of her stepping carefully from the shower, abundantly and gloriously pregnant with Julie. Julie! The name registered then. Without his control, the next image was of that terrible day in the kitchen. Julie was thrusting her naked, spread crotch at him, taunting him. It would for all time be among his most disturbing memories. The mental slide show ended with a jolt as he realized his hand was inside his robe, grasping his erect penis. No! He would not harbor incestuous thoughts about his daughter! His daughter? He had no daughter any more! She was a sexy woman, so much like the coed Theresa he had fallen in love with. The need to ejaculate was getting very strong. Why not use Julie for his fantasy? She deserved it! He no longer owed her any respect! No longer just holding his cock, he was into full scale stroking, the robe thrown open. Just when he felt himself at the crest of the slide to orgasm, a knock on the door shattered everything. Seriously pissed at the interruption, he tried to think who it might be. If it was a hotel employee, for whatever reason, the manager would be receiving some real Hell. Pulling the robe over his protrusion and stalking angrily to the door, he opened it a foot or so without looking through the peephole first. When he saw Sylvia standing there, he was too befuddled to react. ------- Chapter 18 From the few seconds Vince had seen Sylvia before, she was barely recognizable as the same person. Before, her face had initially shown fear, quickly followed by dismay. Now, she wore a little smirk that could only be described as lusty. Not waiting for a reaction from him, she pushed the door open gently and moved past him into the room. As she passed him, she reached down and gently squeezed the bulge in the front of his robe. "Guy like you shouldn't have to do it himself," she said with a giggle. 'Just goes to show how wrong fleeting first impressions can be', he said to himself. The Sylvia in his room now was certainly no shrinking violet, as he had rated her from their brief encounter before. "Personally, I liked my first view of you better," she said as she sat down in one of the side chairs. He was starting to get uncomfortable again because he was definitely not in control of the situation. She must have seen him about to react. "Can we talk, Vince?" That was all it took to defuse any hasty reaction he had been about to make. Still having said nothing, he turned the other side chair to face her and sat. "I thought I had seen the last of you two," he was finally able to say in a steady voice. "You may have seen the last of Claire," she admitted, "although she couldn't stop babbling about you after your first time. What the hell did you say to her? I can't remember when she was so pissed off." He recounted his nasty comment, and she looked at him thoughtfully. "Are you a shrink? You may have come too painfully close to the truth. She really does love the guy, and he treats her like a queen. It's just that they have gotten... oh, out of synch in bed." "So why did you come back?" Looking him squarely in the eye, she told him "I really wanted to be with you. I told Claire her idea was all wrong, though, and I guess I was right. I came back to see if we could maybe take a little time to get to know each other. I'd really like to end up there," and she pointed to the bed, "especially after your greeting before." That almost made him blush, but he caught it in time. Falling back on his instinctive good manners, he asked "Shall we order in from room service?" "If you're willing," she answered, "I'd like to go out to eat and maybe dance a little. Claire was worried about being seen with you. I'd like nothing better than for my asshole ex to hear about me being out with a stud like you." He knew she was skillfully pushing his buttons, but he liked it. "Deal!" he told her as he stood to get dressed. He was about to pick up his underwear and trousers and go into the bathroom to put them on when she walked up to him with a grin and pulled the robe off of his shoulders. Tossing it aside, she took the shorts and held them out for him. It was obvious that she wanted to help him dress, and he was immediately uncomfortable again. But he made the mistake of looking her in the eyes, and her expression showed such eagerness and hope that he could not deny her. Resting a hand on her shoulder, he stepped into his shorts. As she pulled them up, she had to push his penis down and in to bring the waistband up as he had not fully shrunk from earlier. The way she handled him was not seductive, just intimate, and when his shorts were on, she beamed at him. "Which shirt?" she asked, walking to his suitcase. "Do you wear a T-shirt or an undershirt?" That's the way it went for the next few minutes as she dressed him completely. Why he let her do it, he had no idea, unable to recall as similar episode with Theresa. When they were finished, she gave him a firm hug and a brief kiss on the lips. "Thank you, Vince. It is so nice just to be close and intimate like that. I like men. I like seeing them, touching them, being close to them. I lost that kind of relationship with my ex some years ago - his choice, not mine." "My pleasure," he answered, not sure how to respond to her emotional comment. "Um, before we go out," she said as she handed him her cell phone, "please call Claire." "Oh, I doubt she wants to hear from me," he protested. "Maybe not, I don't know. But please try, will you? I love her, and she was trying to do me a favor. It went bad, but she still needs companionship." "You mean she needs sex, don't you?" "That, too," she answered with a giggle. "Will you?" She took back the phone, dialed, and handed it to him again, forcing him to end the call if he was unwilling. After Claire answered and he said hello, she was quite calm. Never one for apologies, Vince was finding himself doing things for Sylvia that puzzled him. "Claire, that was a very sexy, very generous idea you had. I... I didn't react well. I'm sorry." With a slight catch in her voice, Claire told him "I thought you would be really pleased. What happened?" How could he answer that? With a flash of inspiration, he asked her "How would you have felt if you had come alone and dropped your coat like before, but I had my brother there?" "But you're a man, and..." she did not know how to finish that statement. "That's something we can talk about some other time, if there is another time. I would like there to be. Would you?" "Once I got over wanting to castrate you, I wished I would have stayed around," she answered. "Yes, I enjoyed what we did before, and I want some more." "I'm taking Sylvia out for dinner and dancing. Would you care to join us?" he asked. "You know I can't take a chance on being seen with you," she reminded him. "But you will just be along with your sister and her date. That shouldn't be a problem, should it?" "No, I guess not. Say, how come you're wasting time eating and dancing?" she asked with the first light tone she had shown. "Hey, you and I spent a lot of time getting acquainted. Sylvia and I thought it would be good for us to do a little of it. Can we pick you up?" ------- Throughout the evening, Vince discovered that Sylvia was less intense, more humorous, and more sultry than her sister. As they danced, she could tell he was checking out her extra padding, and told him "Food as comfort. I've needed it the last couple of years. I'm ready to wage war on the bulges, though. I've never been this heavy before. You are helping my willpower a lot." As they were walking to Sylvia's car, the women were whispering, and she announced "We're spending the night at my place." "But I don't have anything with me," he protested. Claire, well-recovered from her upset, reached over to squeeze his crotch and told him "You've got the only thing you really need." It was Sylvia who explained "This way, we can all spend the night together. Her husband calls every night he is on the road. If he doesn't get her at home, he calls my place. He is used to it, so there will be no suspicion." Vince felt the rising irritation again at being led rather than leading. However, the opportunity for a first-ever threesome was appealing enough for him to put aside his pride for once, and he agreed. Once in Sylvia's house, which she had retained after the divorce, he took the opportunity to re-establish some degree of control. Sylvia had asked for drink preferences and was starting to fill the requests when he came up behind her. He undid the button at the waist of her skirt and eased it to the floor, causing her to gasp in surprise. "Are you that impatient?" Claire asked with a giggle. "Not at all," he retorted. "I'm just returning a favor. She dressed me, so I'm undressing her. "Well," Claire exclaimed, "in that case, we'd better make sure your clothes don't get wrinkled or soiled. They're the only ones you have with you." There followed a frolic worthy of three teenagers as they all began removing clothing from each other. They did not get crazy and damage any items, but there was much joking and laughter. Vince was having a good time, even though he kept thinking how unlike him the scene was. Sylvia did not have a shower big enough for group activity, so they used the main one separately while the other two sat in the master bedroom and chatted. He noticed the total lack of shyness when the women were naked around each other. Without any personal experience in such things, he was still familiar enough with stories and folklore to make the connection. The sisters were probably sexually involved with each other. The idea did not bother him at all. As he was walking out from his shower, still toweling his hair, he told them "You know Claire, you about wiped me out by yourself. I'm assuming you two can help each other out when I run out of gas." Both of the women looked at him quickly with open mouths, then looked at each other and giggled. It was all the answer he needed. Sylvia had found a razor, some aftershave, and a tooth brush, so he was finished with grooming after his shower. By unspoken agreement, they all remained naked after their little disrobing frolic. The women, however, seemed to have numerous applications of cremes and such to take care of, so he just sat and watched. Despite the strangeness, he enjoyed himself. It was impossible for him not to compare the two female bodies with his 'exes', Theresa and Lee, and it was an unfair comparison. Both sisters, however, were appealing in their own ways. Claire was lean and taut from vigorous exercise. She was more like Lee in that she moved with a sense of strength. That she was no teenager was obvious, yet her maturity had its own appeal. Sylvia was carrying at least fifteen extra pounds, and not all of it found places to hide. Like Theresa, she was rounded and voluptuous and her movements had a natural seductiveness to them. The way she held herself indicated that she was used to feeling desirable. That meant the extra pounds were fairly recent, as she had claimed, and probably temporary. As he sat and watched, he caught Sylvia's eye as she walked by and motioned her toward himself. When she was close, he ran his hand up over her hip and gently squeezed a roll of extra flesh. "How many?" he asked. It was a mean thing to do, but he felt he owed them a few. After a quick blush and a momentary look of anger, she composed herself and answered without rancor "Eighteen more than my driver's license says." She quickly added "Sis and I always worked out together until... I'll be starting with her again tomorrow." To try to soften the sting of his question, he stroked her hip and ass cheek, planted a kiss right above her mound, and smiled up at her. Her eyes locked right at his relaxed penis and she saw it move on its own, bringing a big grin to her face. The evening was a total contrast to his first time with Claire. That had been frantic, almost desperate. Now, there was definite anticipation, but they all seemed to be enjoying the build-up. It was... comfortable. Not at all what Vince was used to with sex, but he was enjoying every minute. When the women were done primping, Sylvia pulled back the covers on the bed and turned off all but a couple of small mood lights. While she did that, Claire knelt between his knees and began fondling his penis. "Sylvia stayed on the pill, and she has been tested since her last time. Is that enough assurance for you?" He nodded. "Good. Don't want to mess with raincoats. Let's not do any handjobs or blowjobs on you, OK? You've only get so many shots, and we'd both prefer them where they belong." "It kills me to say this," Claire went on, "but do Syl first. It's been longer for her. But you'd better have another for me, Buster!" She got to her feet and held out her hand to him. When he stood, she pulled him gently by his now-hard cock until Sylvia could take it in her hand. Sylvia in turn led him to the bed. When they laid down face to face and began kissing, Claire pressed her front to his back and began leisurely caresses. It was no surprise when Sylvia's breath quickened immediately and she told him "Let's leave the lovey stuff for later. What I need is a good, hard, fucking. I'm told you're just the man to deliver." When she encircled him with her arms and her legs once he was embedded, it was a different feeling than with either Theresa or Lee. He was alert enough to chide himself for always thinking about his 'exes' and comparing, but it was impossible to stop. Sylvia was passionate and energetic, just as Vince was used to. The cushiony feeling of her soft tummy against his was different, but not at all a turn off. Her breasts were at least as large as Theresa's but not quite as firm. The real difference he could feel was a sort of a hunger - the hunger of a starving person. As the intensity increased, the hunger gave way to surprise, a little awe, then unbridled joy. It became clear that the pounding he was giving her was what she had always yearned for, but had seldom, if ever, experienced. Her passion and his level of anticipation did not make for a long buildup for him. He came much sooner than he would have liked, but remained firm enough to stay within her. To compensate for his relatively short fuse, he ignored the tenderness and kept moving until he hardened again. That had not happened to him for many years, but he felt like he was in a challenge situation. "I hope you're not thinking about giving her a second load," Claire hissed as she hugged herself to his plunging, sweating body. "The next one's mine." He did not consider her challenge worth an answer, and just kept on going. Claire validated his earlier assumptions by sliding her hand between them to work her sister's clit as he rammed in and out. Their motion was so strenuous it was hard for her to keep contact, but she hung in there and Sylvia peaked with a screech. When Sylvia came, he was not yet restored enough to join her. His ego was assuaged because he had serviced her properly, and Claire was mollified because she would get his next injection. Within another twenty minutes, he was reduced to watching through half-open eyes as the sisters pleasured each other. The two sexual dynamos had exhausted him already, even causing momentary dimming of his vision during his second climax. The proud, controlling part of him was not happy with the ego hit. The horny male part of him, however, was willing to take a little humiliation for the pleasure of the threesome. To his complete surprise, watching the pair had him serviceably hard before too long. Sylvia happened to be on top of Claire with her ass in the air, and he did not bother with permission. Her reaction as he grabbed her generously cushioned hips and slid in proved that none was needed. For another half hour, he was able to fuck both of them without ejaculating again. Sylvia got Claire off with her mouth as as pounded her. It was quite a feat for her to keep enough contact for stimulation and still avoid bruising her sister's sensitive areas. It was the best part of the evening for Vince in some ways because he felt very much in control. He had the rare feeling that he could keep going forever, and let loose his load whenever he chose. Claire let Sylvia taper off from her climax, which was a truly magnificent one. Then, she squirmed out from under her sister and got on her hands and knees, ready for the same treatment. Sylvia made it easy as she collapsed forward off of his rod, then rolled to her side, barely able to look up at the other two. In the rear-entry position, Claire was able to demonstrate the true intensity of her sexual hunger. He and Sylvia had been energetic, the slapping of his thighs against her ass loud in the room. Claire just took it to a whole new level, her constant vocalizations drowning out the even louder slapping sounds. She must not have come down completely from the orgasm induced by her sister's mouth, because she came again after six or seven minutes of his thrusting. He had not touched her with his hands except to hang onto her hips and Sylvia was not yet recovered enough to assist in getting her off. When she came, he had to quickly circle his arms around her middle and hang on for dear life to keep from getting bucked off - it was the only analogy that came to mind. There was definitely a different feeling to the sisters. When Sylvia came, it was like a cloud of warmth and pleasure engulfing both of them. With Claire, an orgasm was more like a combined lightning bolt and thunderclap. The power involved had a definite hint of danger. Once again chiding himself for comparing, he had to admit that neither of his exes ever matched Claire's incredible energy output. Her explosion was good for Vince. It got him back to his old competitive sex mode and he gave her no chance to rest and recover after her come. She started to collapse forward and he just went with her, arms still around her and in and out motion never stopping. Sylvia, though limp, had been watching closely and grabbed a pillow to push under her sister's crotch. That gave Vince a little better angle. He had to prop himself up more than if Claire had been on her knees, but he was able to keep up the rhythm. It was many minutes later when Claire came again. Still, he did not slack off, now ready for one more ejaculation of his own. However, that part of the plan did not go quite as he expected. After a few more minutes, he could not seem to get any closer, and a little frustration began to set in. Failure to produce another load would not leave the image he intended. There was certainly plenty of stimulation. Stretched out as she was with her legs together, she was plenty tight around him. In fact, he felt a bit of panic over whether the friction would become too painful before he could unload. His concentration was such that he did not notice Sylvia leaving the bed. Sylvia's whereabouts became very clear when he felt a cold, slippery sensation around his anus, then uncomfortable pressure as Sylvia wormed a finger into him. Her action very nearly brought everything to a halt as this was more upsetting than stimulating to him - at least at first. Fortunately for her, she was able to gain entry rather quickly and begin some in and out motions. That brought the pleasure and pain into balance and stopped the threatened wilting of his shaft. Once her finger was safely in place, Sylvia leaned on his back and began egging him on. "Come on, Stud! I know you've got another load just waiting to stuff that old bitch's cunt. You aren't gonna let that scrawny old hag get the best of a stallion like you, are you. Only two shots for the whole night? Awwww, I know you can do better than that. In fact..." Whether from some kind of training or from kinky prior encounters, Sylvia had perfect knowledge of his internal plumbing. Her digit, which had been just moving in and out, curled a bit and began rubbing on his prostate. After less than ten seconds of that, he howled like an animal and blasted three surprisingly heavy jets into Claire. Sylvia had to withdraw quickly, as he literally collapsed to his side, his penis already shrinking as it slid out of Claire. If he had not been so near to unconsciousness, he might have felt shamed by the next several minutes. Instead, he just went with the flow. The sisters helped him to his feet and into the shower, where they somehow got him washed off. While Claire sat him on the stool and dried him, Sylvia quickly stripped the bed and put on clean sheets, then together they got him into bed. Each of them showered and he was aware in that dreamy half-state. When both women were clean and had joined him in bed, they hugged him, caressed him, and heaped compliments on him. Falling asleep with each hand squeezed gently between a woman's thighs was another new thrill. The fact that it might be painful to pee through his battered penis in the morning was a problem he would worry about then. As it it turned out, Sylvia provided the most soothing penis therapy possible with a wake-up blowjob. She stopped as soon as he was good and hard, well short of him losing it. Ignoring his protests about his bladder, she sat right down on his cock and got her morning workout plunging up and down. After yet another shower, he was slightly irritated to be told that his clothes were being held until just before he walked out the door. Sylvia, however, had a way of getting him to accept things that in the past would have pushed him into a fight. Her very sensual, almost reverent way of touching him stroked his ego directly. They had a very nice breakfast, all still naked. ------- During the flight home two days later, Vince started out almost euphoric, but as the miles fell behind, reality began to set in. Participating in three different threesomes had pushed the truth of his situation to the back of his mind. He was divorced. He no longer had a steady female companion. He was a plane flight away from the sisters Claire and Sylvia. If he did not do something about it, there would be a lot of attention from his hand when he got back home. On top of his serious lack of dependable sex, he had concerns about Sylvia. Unlike Claire, she was unattached, and therefore automatically looking for a husband. Oh, he liked her, all right: she was bright, passionate - a very good partner. When she lost her weight, he expected she would look very good. But what he wanted was sex with no strings. Claire fit that specification, but Sylvia did not. And of course there was the distance problem. By the time he landed, Vince had to invoke his self-assurance to keep from feeling down. The anger, he didn't try to fight off. It was all Theresa's fault, and at times like that it was hard to remember the love and the passion he had once felt for her. Walking off of the plane, Vince felt none of the uplift or restoration the trip should have provided. ------- Three weeks after Libby's birth, Theresa and Roland were on the way to see Libby when he asked her if a short detour was OK. It was about ten miles between their homes, and one or both of them seemed to make the trip daily. They were within a half mile of the Voss home when he turned into a street and stopped in front of a very nice walkout ranch in a fairly upscale neighborhood. There was a car sitting in the drive and a smartly dressed young woman stepped out to greet them. That was when Theresa caught on that they were looking at a prospective home purchase. "Roland, why? Our house is plenty large." "Depending on how many kids we have," he corrected her. "But this is so close to your kids and to Libby." "But Julie and Terry won't always be there," she said with concern. "So, we might have to move again later. I'll bet they find reasons to live close by, though," he told her. "Oh, Roland, you're so thoughtful, but this is..." "Honey, those kids are the most important things in your life. I think it will help if you are closer." "But the expense of moving! And this is an expensive house! Can you really afford it?" "Well, uh, if you say 'yes', we'll move in this weekend. I'll buy it with cash," he told her. "But what about selling the other house?" "There's no rush. I own it outright," he assured her. "You... you can own two nice houses outright? I... I guess there's still a lot about you I don't know," she stammered. "You know," he said, pulling her aside into a hug, "the fact that you never even asked about money means a lot to me." "I knew I had enough to survive on. Just your love and attention was more than enough," she declared. "Well, I'm happy to be able to get you close to your family and your friends." The house tour was delayed for a session of tears, but when it resumed, the place was a big hit, and within a few days, Theresa was within an easy walk of her children and her granddaughter. ------- In early April, Terry received a scholarship to State. It had been a close call because technically he had generous financial resources behind him. It was not a complete scholarship, but coupled with his fund, it provided enough so he did not have to work during his college years. He declared his intention to continue with the remodeling business, anyway. Glen did a good job of sincerely congratulating Terry, but the news hit him hard. It brought back thoughts of the scholarship he had earned and the trauma of having to give it up. Julie sensed his problem right away, and did her best to keep him from dwelling on it. The problem was that the news was just as hard on her. It was her fault that her lover lost his own scholarship. Betty was, of course, very aware of Glen's feelings. She did not try to comfort him with words, but initiated a lot more than their usual contact. State was an excellent choice, as far as Ellie and Terry were concerned. It was a six hour drive away, and that would make their first year tough. However, Ellie had already been approached about a swimming scholarship there, and she was determined to accept it if it came through. Their dream of being in college together was a real possibility. ------- Theresa and Roland agreed on a very low-key wedding late in March, just three days after she was final. He was not Catholic and she did not feel good about getting the Church involved, so they went the JOP route. Despite their wishes, though, the demand was so great that a very nice reception was staged. Several from her family traveled to be there. His were all local, and they and his employees and business associates made up the bulk of the attendees. Just entering her third trimester, Theresa was resplendent, but looked healthy and radiantly happy. Theresa had absolutely refused any talk of a honeymoon. She repeatedly declared that just her new life was all the honeymoon she needed or wanted. Roland was disappointed, but knew her well enough by now not to try to argue. ------- In June, Gina Comstock arrived to great joy and no medical problems. She was indeed another miniature of Theresa or Julie. If he had sired her, Roland could not have been any more thrilled. He went through every possible thing about the birth that was available to him. Being considerably older than most of the fathers in the classes bothered him not in the least. He really noticed no one but Theresa, anyway. Once the baby was home, he wanted to be involved in everything about caring for her. Theresa once joked to Betty that if Roland could have figured out how, he would have breast-fed Gina for her. In the same conversation, she told Betty that she had a new goal in life: to provide a son for Roland. More children had been her path to redemption, originally. Now, she wanted to reward the wonderful man who had done so much to bring her from the brink of despair to a happiness she never expected. She doubted her being almost constantly pregnant for the first few years of their life together would bother him in the least. Her only concern was how long she could realistically bear more children. After moving into the new place, Theresa had been even more adamant about taking her 'turn' babysitting Libby while Julie worked, being so close. Within just a few weeks of Gina's birth, she was declaring that two were little more work than one. Reluctantly, Julie agreed to let her have Libby two days a week while Betty did the other three. For the first month or so that Theresa had both infants, Ellie made it a point to be there an hour or more a day for extra help. It became a time of significant interaction with her future mother-in-law. Although she had lost her earlier animosity toward the woman, Ellie had not had a chance to really get to know her. Nearly every day, she remarked to Terry how she could not imagine Theresa doing all the things that had hurt him so much. ------- In mid-summer, Theresa felt like she was living a dream. She was experiencing a kind of love that was beyond even her best times with Vince. On top of that, she and Julie were at least approaching the kind of relationship she saw between Betty and Ellie: to her, that was the ideal. Terry was able to talk to her with almost no flare-ups of the old feelings. He could not be said to be warm toward her, but he was polite and considerate. Ellie and Terry could not be any more in love. For her, it was her nature to be a life-long one-man woman, just like her mother. For him, Ellie's love filled the life-long emptiness that he had thought would always be his lot. The way she committed herself to him wholeheartedly and unconditionally destroyed the defenses he had built up over the years. There was no chance his love for her could be shaken in any way. They were facing a year of much separation, but there was no anguish or dismay. They were secure in the knowledge that they were forever, and mature enough to take the tough year in stride. Julie and Glen were a happy little family with their baby. Their physical intimacy was at its peak, and each seemed committed to making the other's life as satisfying as possible. The closeness was essential because of the other challenges they faced. Both worked terribly hard. Julie did full time at the store and insisted on being a full-time mother when she was home. Glen essentially did full-time as both an employee and a student. They were well aware that without the help of their parents, they had no chance to keep up the pace and get Glen his degree. Betty did everything possible to simplify their lives, and Theresa was always ready to help, even with her own infant to care for. The one challenge that neither Julie not Glen recognized was the continuing barrier between them from the guilt over her pregnancy. Glen thought it was his fault, and Julie knew it was hers. If things were good for the three couples, they were less than perfect for Vince and for Lee. Professionally, Vince had achieved another peak, successfully competing for the job Lee had vacated. Having been in sales his entire career, the move to product management was not trivial. His long-term partnership with Lee on key projects was what won it for him. When he thought of Lee, it was with very mixed reactions. The affair had been wonderful, but the ending had been one of his most humiliating moments. He missed the professional competition she had presented, but he blamed his giving in to her seduction for destroying his marriage. The fact that his divorce was because of how he treated the children was something he had never accepted. The blame had to lie with someone other than him. While his career was booming, his personal life, mainly his sex life, was far from successful. Using the net to find companions locally had so far produced nothing. There had been a number of promising ads, but every one of them was disqualified for some significant reason. Because he was strangely reluctant to seek companions in the usual places, he had not been with a woman since his trip to see Claire (and Sylvia). Just like Vince, Lee was totally immersed in her new position. So immersed, in fact, that she scarcely had time to explore her new city. For her, total involvement in the job was therapeutic, at least to the extent that it gave her something to think about other than Roland. The position was everything she had hoped for, and she was as engaged as at any time in her career. She did not miss Vince, although she sometimes felt bad about the way they had parted. To her own amazement, she quite successfully shoved sex way back in her consciousness. ------- Julie had gotten the furniture store job because the daughter of the owner was a teammate of Ellie's. The girl, Megan, had graduated with Julie, but they had not been closely acquainted. The previous summer, Megan had spent on a tour given as a graduation gift. This summer, she was working at the store, and the two former classmates became much better acquainted. Other than Ellie and her long-term best friend Candy, Julie had not had a lot of close contact with her contemporaries. Considering her status as a mother-to-be and then a teenaged mother, none of her old friends were truly her contemporaries any more. After moving from Candy's house to the Vosses', Julie was so absorbed with the shock of her newly-discovered pregnancy, the anguish of Glen losing his scholarship, her anger at her parents, and the struggle to get their new family going that she did not see much of her old friend for several weeks. As is true of the precious real friends, though, Candy did not forget Julie, and by the fall they were getting together regularly. Candy was going to the U extension, and she and Glen occasionally saw each other on campus. Candy had scrupulously avoided talking about school, sensing that the topic was a source of great pain to Julie. Megan, while not in any way trying to be mean or insensitive, seemed unaware of the subject's impact on Julie. She was going to a well-known private school, and had found what she believed to be her future husband there. By the end of the summer, her tales of being at college with her lover had beaten on Julie like a dripping faucet in the night. They just served to highlight how much Julie had lost by becoming a mother. Megan's stories also reminded Julie of her parents' refusal to let her go to school with Glen. Things had improved steadily between mother and daughter, especially after the birth of the two little girls. To her credit, Julie was able to separate the spiteful forcing of college that her mother had done from the mother she now shared baby adventures with. When school started in September, however, the combination of Terry with his scholarship, Megan going back to be with her love, and even Candy commuting to the Extension got to Julie. She could no longer avoid blaming her mother for what she had lost, along with herself. Theresa was ultra-sensitive about her children's moods, in sharp contrast to her total lack of consideration in earlier years. It did not take long for her to pick up on the change in Julie's demeanor around her. As a credit to her growing maturity, Julie did not refuse to see her mother, nor did she lash out at her. She was not, however, able to act naturally. To Theresa's mind, the relationship began to slide backwards, losing the gains in intimacy that had occurred over the last year. Perhaps naively, Theresa had grown almost ebullient about the increased closeness with both of her children. It had become easy to forget the depth of the scars they carried, but Julie provided a painful reminder. Roland had always encouraged Theresa to share her moods and her feelings openly, something she had not done freely with Vince. He could sense the mood change in her, and he began the campaign to find out the reason. Their relationship had matured with such speed that it was not a hard campaign. She found the ability to lay all of her feelings on him one more reason she kept falling more in love with him. With his logical, analytical mind, Roland suggested an explanation for Julie's pulling back, an explanation that shattered the complacency Theresa had begun to enjoy. It reminded her just how much harm she had done. "Honey," he had explained, "I think Julie is feeling the loss of her college career very strongly right now. With Terry going off, and after hearing about it all summer from her friend at work..." "And I ruined her college experience before she even had a chance to get there," Theresa said through tears. "How so?" he asked. "She had this dream of being at school with Glen. We... I... insisted she was going to the school where Vince and I met, not to the one where Glen was going. She threatened not to go, or to flunk out if we forced her. We never thought so at the time, but she was deadly serious." "So," Roland surmised, "because of you, she believes she never had a chance at a good college experience, anyway." Tears, except those of happiness, had become quite rare for Theresa over the last several months, but now she unleashed a torrent on Roland's shoulder as the truth of his words hit her. "I'll talk to her," he offered. Barely able to get the words out, she objected. "N... no. That's m... my job. I... I did that to her. I have to at least try to apologize. I j... just hate to see th... things back to a y... year ago," she wailed. There was not much he could do but just hold her. ------- The next day after unloading her concern on Roland, Theresa came to see Julie late at night, after Glen left for work. Julie was ready for bed, and not thrilled to see her mother, but agreed to talk. "What we did to you will not stop hurting you, will it, Honey?" she asked Julie, anguish clear on her face. "What do you mean?" "I mean destroying your dreams for college." "I was the one who got pregnant, Mother." "Yes, but we wouldn't let you go with Glen. That was your romantic dream, wasn't it?" Clearly surprised by her mother's openness, Julie was silent for quite a while, then asked "You knew that when you forced me to go to your school, didn't you?" Theresa was unable to do more than nod her head, as she immediately disintegrated into tears. At this stage, Julie did not feel anything like the old anger toward her mother. What she suffered from was more sadness, depression, and some jealousy. Those things made it hard to feel warmth and affection for Theresa. At the same time, the mother she had come to know over the last year was a person she genuinely liked. The unique way they had shared during pregnancy and motherhood had built a new bond that was strong enough to keep the anger from taking over and bursting forth. Instinctively, Julie had always wanted to be close to her mother, even though fear, disgust, and hatred had kept that from happening for most of her life. Moving in with the Vosses and watching Betty and Ellie had shown her what she had missed. The instinctive longing had been a big factor in giving Theresa a chance. Now, having a 'real' mother had become very important to Julie - more important than revenge or venting her anger. As a result, she just put her hand gently on Theresa's lowered head and joined her in tears. Theresa had not thought anything out before coming to see Julie. The idea just came to her as she tried to recover from her crying. "Julie, I... I know how you feel about taking anything from me, but... would you let me pay for regular sessions with Julia for you?" Actually, things had changed so much that Julie no longer viewed refusal of help as a good way to punish her mother. In fact, she felt little urge to punish her at all, any longer. She read Theresa's offer as a measure of her mother's own sincere contrition, and was touched by it, rather than upset. In their few encounters, she had found Julia's uncanny ability to see right through her disconcerting. On the other hand, Julia was someone with whom she could talk about her awful secret, and she needed that badly. This time, it was Julie who could only nod because of the tears. ------- Chapter 19 It was with definitely mixed feelings that Julia welcomed Julie for her first session as a true patient. Julia had come to regard Betty as a very good friend. They had been meeting together for lunch or breakfast almost weekly, and Julia had been invited to dinner a few times when Frank was away. It return, Betty and Alan had been to the Waxman house for dinner once and had been treated to dinner and a play once. Now that Julie was a patient, getting together with Betty posed an ethical problem for Julia. There was certainly no policy or by-law that prevented it, but her own standards weighed against it. Betty was only the patient's mother-in-law, but they were living in the same house. At breakfast the day before Julie's first appointment, Julia had explained her dilemma. "I would sure miss our get-togethers," Betty said, "but if it means better treatment for Julie, that's the way it has to be. I'm really concerned about her, and not just for Glen's sake, either." As she had several times before, Betty almost brought Julia to tears. A big part of the reason she treasured Betty as a friend was that she was the most straight-forward, guileless person she had ever met. She knew Betty's declaration was not a put-on in any way. "Tell you what," Betty went on, "can we try at least once more, after you've met with Julie. I will not bring up anything about her: we can talk about our love lives and good stuff like that. I'll try to be just a girlfriend and not a patient's mother-in-law. 'Course, if you need to ask me something to help with Julie, then I'll be her mother-in-law again. Think that will work?" Julia just reached across and squeezed her hand. Contrasts were nothing new in her profession, but Julia had long ago placed Betty and Vince as primary examples of the extremes, even though she had never met Vince face to face. Her perception of Vince was as the most self-absorbed person on earth. Betty, on the other hand, lived her life as much for her loved ones as anyone she had ever met. As far as she could tell, Julia had never met a person more content with her life than Betty. Vince, on the other hand, must by now have been a pretty miserable man. ------- "Julie, I have to commend you for not taking out your feelings on your mother," Julia said after Julie had described what caused her recent depression. "Well, I kinda did," Julie answered. "She could tell I was, uh, closing up on her." "That was a pretty mild reaction for the way you felt. Don't you hold her responsible for missing the college experience you dreamed about?" Theresa had told Julia why Julie needed to see her. Julie was very quiet for a while, then said "Dr. Waxman, I..." "Call me Julia, please. I know our similar names are confusing, but I like to think you were a friend before you were a patient." "Oh, yeah. Thank you," Julie responded uncertainly. "Anyway, it's hard for me to think of Mom as the same person who did those things. You must see it - how totally different she is. Back at graduation time, I used to lay awake at night thinking of ways I could get revenge on her and my Dad. But what would be the point any more?" "For my whole life, I saw how my friend Candy was with her Mom. I was so jealous - I wanted that. I think all girls want that. Then, when I moved in with Glen, I got some of that with Betty - a lot it. It made me feel even worse for what I had missed. Now, I'm getting it from my own mother. It feels too good to spoil it by getting angry at her all over again." "Julie, I've spent years with patients and failed to get them to the place you have just expressed. Are you sure you really need to see me?" "Hey, I told you what my mind has figured out," Julie answered with some animation. "Maybe you can help me get my feelings to go along with my mind. Besides, you're the only person I can talk to about the Big Thing." "Ah, yes. The Big Thing," Julia said, restraining a chuckle at the euphemism for Julie's intentional pregnancy. "Of course, you already know my view on the Big Thing from when we talked before." "Yes, I know. You're afraid that it will poison our marriage. My problem is that I'm afraid it would destroy it right now if he found out." "And you're hoping that time will bring enough reasons to stay married that you can survive as a couple when he finds out?" Julia asked. "You seem so certain that he will find out," Julie said with some irritation. Julia decided not to respond, and they sat in silence for a while. Julia broke the silence with a somber tone. "Julie, I am concerned that the Big Thing will affect your feelings and attitude toward your daughter." "Oh, no, I'd never..." Julie started to object, but stopped in mid-sentence and stared at Julia. When Julie seemed to sag in her chair, Julia spoke again. "I take it you've been concerned about that yourself. Do you think about Libby as the reason all of your dreams are gone?" "Now, wait," Julie said with some irritation, "not all of my dreams are gone. I'm going to be with Glen forever, and that's my biggest dream of all." "But you've already admitted that your marriage might not survive him discovering the Big Thing." Julia knew that was a very strong, inflammatory statement. She did not want to hurt the girl, but she had to make sure Julie had a realistic understanding of her situation. The tears that began running down Julie's cheeks told her she understood it very well. "I'm sorry, Julie. I hope you know I would not intentionally hurt you. I need to find out where your head is about your situation. You were telling me that not all of your dreams are dead. What else is still alive?" "I've always seen myself as a mother, and now I am one. And Libby is more wonderful than I could have imagined." Julie brightened up quickly when she mentioned Libby. "You know, when I hold her, I sometimes think how I would feel if someday she just walked away and never wanted to see me again. It makes me more sympathetic toward Mom." "But you never think of Libby as the cause of what you missed out on?" "She didn't cause it. I had her on purpose, and it was the only thing I could do. Mom and Dad were the ones who really killed the dreams." "Yet you no longer hate your mother?" "No! Are you trying to convince me that I should?" Julia asked with obvious anger. "Of course not, Julie. I am trying to get a good picture of what you are thinking and feeling." "I will tell you I hate that woman that was married to my father. But that's just not Mom." "Do you believe that she was as much a victim of your father as you and Terry were?" "Yes! Terry and I have talked about this a lot. He's not where I am, but we agree that Dad was just so powerful that he overwhelmed all of us. Mom became what he forced her to be. The woman that is married to Roland couldn't even be related to the mother I ran away from." "Do you hate your father?" "Oh, wow? I guess you are trying to find out. I would say I see him as the real cause of everything bad that has happened to me. I don't care if I ever see him again. Do I wish for bad things to happen to him? I guess being so hardheaded he lost someone like Mom is enough punishment. Of course, if he doesn't realize just what he lost, it isn't much punishment, is it?" "You don't think he realizes it?" "I have no way of knowing, and I certainly don't want to ask him," Julie declared. "My guess would be that he has made her into the villain in his mind." "You're very reluctant to admit to hatred, aren't you?" Julia asked. "To me, hatred is an out of control emotion," Julie explained. "If you had grown up with us, you would have seen what out of control emotion can do. I don't ever want to be like that." Theresa had stunned Julia several times with her insights and declarations. Now, her daughter had made a stunningly profound statement. "Does that make you, um, restrain your emotions a lot, then?" Julia asked almost without thought. "Not the good ones," Julie said with her first smile in a long time. Writing or pretending to write notes was an excellent way to plan a new line of questioning. Julia thought it was time for that change, and wrote for a minute or so before continuing. "Was there anything else from your talks with Megan that caused you to be jealous or depressed? Something besides the college experience." "Oh! Um, yeah, there was," Julie responded quickly. "She has so many things, anything she wants, in fact. Mom and Dad had money like that. I could have had most anything I wanted." "But you didn't want it?" "Of course I wanted it. I just wasn't willing to pay the price." "Which was... ?" "Be exactly what they expected me to be. Get straight A's, keep my virginity, go to their college, be their perfect little display doll." "In other words, buy their favor?" "Yeah, I guess that's the way I thought about it." "Was that such a high price?" "If I hadn't started going with Glen, I might have been willing to just go along. What they wanted meant being separated from him. That was too much." As the session neared its end, Julia tried to explain some of the harsh questions she had asked. Julie assured her she understood and thanked Julia for listening and for making her think. ------- Julie had understated the impact of all of Megan's talk of wealth and possessions. And it was not just Megan. The entire store, and especially its clientele, screamed 'MONEY'. When she drove, Julie parked their ten-year-old economy car in the back lot with the cars of the warehouse gang. Most of the sales staff drove cars more like the customers'. The main lot usually resembled a luxury car dealership. All day on the job, she interacted with people whose only concern about dropping several thousand on a single piece of furniture was whether it was exactly the right color, or whether it could be delivered in time for the big party. Price never seemed to be an issue. For a girl who had once been able to live that way, it was hard to be reminded that she was now on the other side. Several of the salespeople were themselves quite well off. Her fashion conscious eye knew how long the women could go before wearing the same outfit again, and it was a long time. She had struggled to get mix and match clothes that at least looked like something different every day of the week. To her credit, Julie had not let the wealth gap bother her for the first year of her marriage, but her constant interaction with Megan over the summer broke through her ability to ignore the disparity of her own circumstances. The Menconi home was filled with quality things. One of the few activities Julie had shared with her mother as a teen was shopping. She had hated the clothes her mother forced on her, but she learned to recognize quality, nonetheless. She had no negative feelings about the home furnishings, and already had a good eye for quality and style when she started working at the store. That was partly why she became a successful salesperson so quickly. Even her sessions with Julia could not keep her from feeling more and more deprived as time went on. With Glen planning on being a teacher, she knew that she would never be able to shop in the store where she was working. The exquisite items that her customers ordered so casually often cost more than any car they would likely own. Julie was not naturally greedy or covetous, but she did like nice things. The economic disparity was something that wore on her little by little over a long period of time. In retrospect, she might have been better off finding another job, but she probably could not have equaled her earnings anywhere else. She was certainly not the first poor person making a living selling things she could never hope to buy. Nor was she ungrateful for the good things she did have. But neither was she impervious to the contrasts between the haves and the relative have nots. Glen's desire to be a teacher had always bothered Julie, being the one thing about him that she was not thrilled with. She held him in such high regard that she believed he could be as successful as her father, or the store owner, or any other man if he would just choose something more lucrative than teaching. Julia ferreted out Julie's feelings and fears about their future financial outlook. Of particular concern to her was the possibility that the girl might start to think less of her husband, even fall out of love with him. She had certainly seen it happen. This was one of those areas where all a therapist could do was help the patient to explore their feelings and concerns thoroughly, then try to give them the best possible perspective. Through the fall and the holiday season, the lost college dream receded in importance, and the economic outlook dominated the sessions. Julia could see the issue growing in importance in Julie's mind, and sensed that she was conducting a controlled retreat with her patient. In a couple of sessions, Julia suggested it might be best for Julie to find a different job. That suggestion was met with surprising resistance, considering the emotional turmoil resulting from the job. Julie made very sound arguments about the level of her earnings and the excellence of the medical coverage. Julia had to concede that she probably could not duplicate them elsewhere. When Julia asked if a reduction in earnings and benefits might not be worthwhile to keep from being bombarded by the economic disparity every day, Julie resisted that idea vigorously. After more detailed discussion, Julia concluded that Julie liked working in the environment of money and expensive things. It was becoming like a fairy tale dream for her, and she did not want to give it up. If she could never have those things, at least let her be around them and dream. The therapy sessions gave Julie an outlet for her frustrations and kept her from taking them out on Glen or Libby. Unfortunately, her bleak economic future was not the only thing about the job that triggered dissatisfaction in Julie. Nearly every sales organization has 'God's gift to women' on the payroll. Depending on the class of the organization, he may be crude and sleazy or quite urbane and sophisticated. The furniture store had not one but two such men employed. The commission structure allowed senior sales 'consultants' to earn very attractive incomes. It only happened through legitimate skill, hard work, and tenure, so the caliber of consultants was generally high. That only made more impact on Julie. The problem was that these men were polished extroverts. They were impeccably groomed and dressed. They drove the kind of cars the customers had, and they frequented the higher class clubs and restaurants. And they were committed single hunter types. With Julie's looks, she was a constant target of male customers and employees alike. The owner and the sales manager, a woman, were very ethical people, and very much attuned to the dangers of harassment and sex discrimination. As did all new employees, Julie had an orientation session where it was made clear that no sale was worth her tolerating any kind of abuse or pressure from a customer. That message had been reinforced regularly, and there had been a few times when she had sent a customer away because of crude or suggestive comments. She was learning how tenuous was the correlation between money and class. With her two flirtatious coworkers, there was never a problem of harassment or crude behavior. They were both classy guys - but classy guys with active hormones. They were always courteous and helpful to her, but they missed no chance to deliver a compliment, either. It did not take long for the wolves to determine that there was zero chance of getting Julie into bed, or of even getting her to go out with them. To her, that was not even a remote possibility. That, however, did not diminish her appeal in their eyes, and only seemed to redouble their efforts to flirt with her. Any woman responds to compliments and flirtatious attention, and Julie was no exception. Knowing what the guys really wanted did no harm to her ego, either, regardless of the fact that she would never even consider it. The real impact of the two guys on Julie was to put Glen at a disadvantage by contrast. They were bon vivantes, while Glen hardly had a life. They avidly pursued and talked endlessly about every pleasure that was in vogue. All Glen did was go to work, go to school, swim, and spend as much time as he could with Julie and Libby. Both of the guys could have modeled for GQ in their work attire. Glen went to work at night in clothes appropriate for a warehouse, including the store vest and ID badge. To school, he wore jeans and whatever top was appropriate for the weather. The guys seemed to have a contest to see who could make Julie react the most to their compliments. Glen was uniformly sweet and considerate. He worshipped her body nearly every night with a lotion massage. But he was not constantly heaping praise on her for her beauty. Julie was certainly no venal airhead to be swayed by superficial things. She understood and appreciated Glen's drive and determination, and stood in awe of his endurance. She melted every time she saw him loving up Libby, and she fairly vibrated as he applied lotion to her naked body. But there was little excitement or flash in their lives, and that was what the two guys represented in abundance. She knew Glen was the reality of her life, but she could not stop the tendrils of discontent from worming their way in over the months. As a boyfriend, Glen had done very well at the excitement aspects of their relationship. But when suddenly faced with family responsibility, he was so determined not to fail that he could only see what he had to do for survival and for future success. The little getaway weekend at the cabin had been a nice infusion of some excitement, but it had never been repeated. They barely went out to dinner or an event of any kind once a month. He had become so consumed by the urgent that he was losing sight of the important. He was doing his part to make the contrast unflattering to himself, even though he knew nothing of the comparison that his wife faced every day. As for his goal of teaching: he never had any reason to question or reevaluate it. That was a subject Julia began hammering on in their sessions after the holidays. Julie discussed her feelings and concerns readily in the sessions, but had never voiced a word of concern or discontent to Glen. Her guilt toward him was already so heavy that she could not imagine criticizing him in any way. Julia's counsel to start talking to him about his career choice fell on deaf ears. He was killing himself to fulfill his dream. How could she suggest to him that his dream wasn't a good one for his family? As the winter wore on, Julie steadfastly refused to open up to her husband about her concerns. She also refused to try to prod him toward more romance and excitement. Her guilt would not let her do those things, and thus her guilt caused them to smolder and fester inside of her. ------- Glen was practically killing himself. Only his steadfast commitment to swimming kept his body from deteriorating under the constant demands and the minimal sleep. Only the kind of mental discipline that allowed a person to excel in a grueling sport like swimming could keep him to his murderous schedule. On top of his full slate of classes, he was constantly working another course on the side. The U allowed certain 'non-core' course requirements to be fulfilled by proficiency exams. As spring approached, he was working on his fifth such exam, having successfully tested out of four courses in the first year and a half. He believed he could graduate a year from the coming May, after just six full semesters and two summer sessions. In what little extra time he had at school, he began exploring employment possibilities, an effort that was not encouraging. He discovered to his dismay that the Extension had not placed a teaching grad in a metro area public school in seven years. Those demand districts were able to pick and choose their candidates, and always chose from more highly rated schools, often insisting on advanced degrees. Even State did not place many grads in the area. The sad fact was that when he graduated, he would have to move his family to another city, probably a much smaller city. They would have to leave their families and the wonderful support system that had allowed them to get to that point. He would miss his family, but Julie really was finding a family for the first time. It would be very hard on her. Economically they would take a big beating. As he checked out the salaries at some of the districts where grads had gone recently, he saw that most were barely more than his wage at the grocery store. Julie was making more than he was, and more than the starting pay at any of the out-state districts. It was a cruel awakening to one of the realities of his chosen profession. Glen was a very goal-oriented person, and tremendously disciplined. What he was not was wealth-oriented. In all the years that he pointed toward a teaching career, he really never took a serious look at the financial prospects. He knew that the retirement and health benefits were usually very good, but he had paid little attention to the salaries. As a matter of fact, the main reason for choosing teaching was because it was the avenue to coaching, his real dream. For several days after his examination of the placement history, Glen had difficulty sleeping, a problem he could ill afford. Julie knew something was bothering him and asked about it several times. He, however, was terrified of telling her what their prospects were. She would never find a job that she liked as well and that paid as well in one of those smaller towns. How would they afford an apartment and a car on the salaries being offered? It seemed to him that teaching was intended as a supplementary income for a family, at least in the smaller, poorer districts. What troubled him as much as anything was why it had taken him so long to discover these discouraging facts. Was he being mercenary to put so much emphasis on the pay? But he had a family to support! That was the key factor! A beginning teacher was supposed to be single and able to live in minimal accommodations until the salary got closer to a living wage. Those starting salaries were never intended to support a wife and a child. What should he do? Teaching and coaching was all he had ever thought about doing. Would he have to go on for a Masters and try to get into a better-paying metro district? But that would add almost two more years, and the Extension did not have a Masters program in Education. Where would he go? The tuition at Addison University was out of sight, as it was at two other private colleges in town. The degrees from those schools were worth a lot more, but he had to get there, first. Even with the trust money and his earnings from work, he couldn't cover the cost. Besides that, sooner or later they had to move out on their own. ------- After four days of turmoil and very little sleep, Glen had reached no resolution to his problem, but was able sleep from sheer exhaustion. Then, he was blind-sided by another event that was very disturbing to him. Ellie got her swimming scholarship to State. She knew what the news would probably do to her brother, and it took a lot of the joy out of her achievement. Betty found her sitting on her bed with the acceptance letter, tears streaming down her face. "Bad news, Honey?" Betty asked. "No, uh... no. No. I, uh, got the scholarship at State." "Then why?... Oh, God! You sweetheart!" Betty sat next to her daughter and wrapped both arms around her. She added some sniffles of her own to Ellie's sobs for a while, then pushed back to arms length. "Is Glen going to be proud of you?" she asked Ellie. "Sure." "Is he going to be happy for you?" "Uh huh." "Would he want you to be crying on his account?" "But it's going to bring it all back again," Ellie wailed through a new rush of tears. "Sweetie, it won't bring it all back 'cause it has never gone away. It's something that will be with him his whole life. What would he do if he saw you right now - crying for him?" "Oh, God! He'd paddle my butt - give me something to cry about." "Right. So you go wash your face and get right down there and tell him. He's awake and studying." Ellie nodded and headed off toward the bathroom. "Ellie, wait!" Betty said just before she got out of the bedroom. Running to her daughter, she literally picked her up and spun her around. "I forgot to say how proud and happy I am." That triggered a round of happy tears. Glen looked up as Ellie rapped on the frame of the open door. He knew instantly why she had come down, just from the mixed emotions showing on her face. He had known this was coming, and had steeled himself for it. Jumping to his feet, he dashed over and duplicated the lift and hug their mother had down. "Congratulations, Babe! I knew you'd get it. I'm so damed proud of you! Have you called Terry yet?" "No, I just opened the letter." "Well, you'd better call him right away. I'm sure he's more interested than anyone." Without saying anything more, he gave her another hug and a kiss on the mouth. He turned her back toward the stairs and sent her off with a little pat on the butt. Ellie was reluctant to leave, as it seemed like Glen was hurrying her away, but she went on up the stairs. Just as she reached the top, she heard the door to their bedroom shut quietly. She paused, then crept back down quietly. With her ear to the door, she could hear him sobbing and reached for the doorknob. Just then, her hand was grabbed and she swung around to see Betty shaking her head and putting a finger to her lips for silence. Ellie let her mother lead her up to the kitchen before she objected, "But Mom, he's hurting real bad." "Do you think going to him will help?" "Well, I'd like to think my support means something to him." "Oh, it does, it does. But if you go in there while he's like that, what will he think?" "I hope he'd think that I love him and hate to see him sad." "Yes, Honey, he would think that. But he would also think that he was spoiling your big day, and that would be very hard on him." "Oh. Well, it did spoil it some. But I guess I don't have to let him know that, do I." "I'm guessing he knows," Betty explained, "but what we're doing here is giving him a chance to protect his dignity, OK?" By suppertime, Glen was able to give a masterful performance of pure joy for his sister. The joy was real, but the anguish of his memories was just as real. Later, Julie let him cry himself out on her shoulder instead of getting her usual massage. ------- Between finding out about the poor job prospects and having painful memories stirred by Ellie's scholarship award, Glen's spirits took a serious nosedive. He could find very little to feel positive about. His lack of self-control had resulted in Julie's pregnancy and all that it meant. All of his hard work since then would not get him a job that could support his family decently. Not only had he screwed up their lives in the first place, he couldn't even do the right things to work them out of the mess! The thought of telling Julie that they would have to move to some podunk town and live on next to nothing was more than he could bear. He just knew he could not do it. It was not right! She needed to be right where they were with her mother nearby. She deserved it after all of the bad years. He considered quitting school right then and looking for a better job. The store had offered him a spot in their management training program. Grocery management salaries were not great, but better than what the out-state school districts were paying beginning teachers. And there was potential for promotion. The problem was, quitting was very difficult for Glen to even consider. He went so far as to check out student loans so he could get a Masters at one of the local colleges. The debt he would accumulate terrified him. Measured against even the better pay for Masters grads in metro districts, it looked like they would be in debt forever. In a quandary with no idea what to do, he just kept doing what he was doing - working himself to death. It became a lot harder, though, without a reasonable reward visible at the end of all the sacrifice. ------- Up until the time of Ellie's scholarship award, the relationship between Julie and Glen had not suffered in any noticeable way due to Julie's concerns. Her feelings for him had not been affected, and her need for his loving was at least as strong as ever. With the demands of a baby, their time together was not their own as it once was, but since Libby passed the one year mark, caring for her was less of a strain than when she was an infant. Actually, she demanded and got more face time, but at least there were no more wee hours feedings. All in all, though, Libby was a binding influence on their marriage. Both parents adored her completely, and they could spend endless amounts of time with both of them playing with her. Julie had always been concerned that her baby would be confused about who her mother was, spending so much time in the care of her grandmothers. So, if Glen was guilty of being too focused on school, Julie probably tried too hard to spend every possible minute with her baby. Since the past summer, Julie had been struggling with the things Julia was trying to help her with, but Glen had been the same as always. His steadfastness was enough to keep the relationship on an even keel. The problem was, when discouragement and depression hit Glen, the anchor lost its hold and the couple became very vulnerable. As high school sweethearts, the couple's lives were structured by school, home, activities, etc. Romance and sex were enough to build a healthy teenaged relationship. There were differences in goals and expectations between them, but the newness and the glamour made them seem insignificant. Julie was by nature aggressive and optimistic. She believed in her abilities and was willing to take risks to get what she wanted. Growing up in an affluent household, she was used to some luxuries, and expected to have them in the future. Glen inherited a good measure of his father's caution and focus on security and stability. He was more oriented toward working hard than to taking risks. His reason for choosing teaching was because of his desire to coach. However, teaching also fit well with his low-risk orientation. The Voss family had not enjoyed many luxuries, and they held relatively little importance to Glen. That kind of expectation gap was something a couple would definitely have to resolve before considering marriage. Going to college together would have been an ideal time to iron out that difference and many others. Unfortunately, Julie and Glen did not have that chance. They went directly from star-struck sweethearts and campus stars to struggling parents. The expectations gap was buried under the need for survival, but it was never resolved. Julie's work environment rekindled her desire for a high standard of living and increased her dissatisfaction with Glen's career choice. His shock when he faced the reality of his future economic outlook left him with his motivation and his self-confidence severely crippled. Julia's advice to Julie all along had been to share her concerns with Glen. Her guilt had prevented her from addressing them for some time. When she finally realized that she could no longer keep them to herself, the timing was terrible. Julia's advice was not wrong. It was just an unfortunate confluence of events. It was a week after Ellie's good news when Julie chose to bring up the subject. He was massaging her, and she was as soft-spoken and gentle as she could be, not even addressing the salary issue directly. "Honey, do you think you will find a job around here when you graduate?" He froze in mid-stroke, his hand on the back of her thigh. The very subject that he most feared addressing was out in the open. Ordinarily, he would have met the problem head on and told her honestly the discouraging facts he had uncovered. It was a measure of the hit his self-esteem had taken that he could not tell her the truth right then. In fact, he actually became angry that she had found a most sensitive spot. He waffled, telling her he was not sure what his prospects were. She knew it, but rather than pressing, she backed off. It had taken a huge effort for her to ask the question. When it looked like things might become argumentative, she could not bring herself to engage. One of the results of the battles from her childhood was a loathing of any kind of argument. Images of her horrible tirade against Glen always arose whenever things got testy, and she almost became physically ill. Julie said no more, and Glen resumed the massage, but things had changed between them, and they both knew it. ------- Julie had trouble sleeping after Glen went to work. She had come up with the question about getting a job nearby on the spur of the moment. The subject she originally wanted to address was salary expectations. That was what she had been agonizing over with Julia since the summer. To her, his prevarication was obvious, and it set off alarm bells in her mind. The idea that they might have to move away in a year had never really occurred to her, but now it sent a chill through her. In high school, the prospect of moving away from her parents and starting a new life with Glen had her ideal dream. Now, the support system of her in-laws and her 'new-found' mother seemed essential: she could not see how they could make without that help. Besides the help, being close to her mother and her new sister was more important than she had realized. Glen was in an uncharacteristically surly mood at work that night. Partly it was because of the question Julie had asked. He read a clear note of criticism in her query. Mostly, though, he was upset because of the way he reacted to her question. Honesty was something he prided himself in, and he had lied to his wife, his lover. Repeatedly as he he worked, he vowed to come clean with her in the morning when he got home. Yet, he knew in his heart he could not do it. Opening up the whole employment issue would force him to admit failure. He had ruined their plans for the future by getting her pregnant. He had bungled his earnest attempts to build a future for them despite the setback. Now, he could not even be honest with her about his failure. In normal circumstances, Glen's self-esteem could have withstood all of the assaults he was experiencing, but there was nothing normal about his life right then. It was approaching two years of a non-stop back-breaking schedule, and he was physically and mentally worn out. His course load was tough, and the semester end was approaching too quickly. In his weakness, he decided to keep up the pretense that all would be well when he graduated. ------- Pretense seldom endures for long in a marriage, especially when the pretender is basically too honest to pull it off. It took a couple of weeks, but Glen finally had to admit to what he had found out about job prospects. The reality of having to move away hit Julie very hard, and produced the first tears that were his fault in a long time. She went through all of the options that he had already considered. When he explained that a Masters would cost too much, it got her back to her original concern about their economic future. The feelings of guilt were still very strong in both of them, each feeling they were responsible for their disrupted future. Those guilt feelings prevenedt either of them from lashing out strongly at the other. Thus, their relationship deteriorated in small, slow stages, with almost no harsh words or open anger. However slowly and however politely, the deterioration did occur, and there were some significant events along the way. Megan worked at the store again that summer, and she was even more enthusiastic about her life than before. The impact on Julie was not hard to understand. Julia did her best, but was unable to defuse the growing discontent and increasing panic in her patient. At some point, the evening lotion massages stopped. There had always been times when they were impossible to schedule for a night or two. After one such lapse, they just never started again. Glen did not offer, and Julie did not ask. Late in the summer, Glen started going to the pool directly from work, rather than hurrying home to spend some time with Julie before he slept. He also worked out more often, finding that swimming was the only thing that eased the turmoil in his mind. Julie had one near-recurrence of former tirades. Their discussions about moving, salaries, other career options, etc. had been more frequent and more energetic. One night, she went on for a long-time, expressing her fears and her desire for a better future for them. Her voice escalated and she became accusatory. She had delivered only one scathing accusation when she saw the look on his face and recognized it from that fateful Sunday noon when she had nearly lost him. That stopped her cold, and she ran sobbing into the bathroom and locked the door. A little later, she apologized profusely and pulled him into bed to make love. Making love, or just having sex, had changed as communications became worse. They still coupled, but it was less frequent and less tender. It was turning into an act of need, rather than one of sharing. Everyone who cared about the couple saw what was happening, and they all felt helpless. Betty had sensed from the announcement of Julie's pregnancy that their marriage faced some very tough challenges. She wished she had been wrong. Theresa saw the breakdown as one more result of her past sins, and resumed her own sessions with Julia. By the time Ellie left for school, Julie and Glen were interacting about Libby, and hardly anything else. Anger was seldom expressed openly, but the isolation was as painful to both them as any angry blast. ------- Through September and early October, Julie and Glen became even more distant. Sex diminished to a trickle. More and more critical comments crept into their conversation, and they began to avoid each other. The love was still there, and neither wanted the breakdown that was occurring. They were just too young; their marriage had been one of necessity, without sufficient time to mature and adjust to each other. And the Big Thing loomed as a huge, deadly problem. Everything was heading downhill. Glen was painfully aware of what was happening to his marriage when his course advisor called him in in mid-October. "Glen, the high school in Melton has a big problem. Their swimming coach, also a math teacher, needs surgery and will be unavailable for two to three months. You could fill in nicely. Would you be willing to do your in-service training right now? I know this is short notice." "But... but... it's the middle of the semester. What about all of my classes?" Glen objected. "I've met with all of the staff involved. We've worked out a way that it won't delay your graduation. I know you're determined to get out in May. We would be so grateful for the help that we will make sure it happens." 'In-service training' was what some schools called 'Methods', and in the past had been known as 'practice teaching'. It was ten to twelve weeks of actual classroom work under the supervision of an experienced teacher. Usually, it was in the last semester before graduation. "If the teacher is laid up, who will be my sponsor?" Glen asked. "That's, uh, why I'm talking to you. You're our best student, and we think you could handle being thrown right in as a regular teacher." "Oh, wow! Aren't there any substitutes?" "Of course there are, but none who know anything about swimming. Look, they want you very badly. They have arranged a nice apartment at no cost to you. It will be a much better situation than most students get. We have talked to your employer and they are willing to give you a leave of absence. They apparently knew this would happen at some time, anyway." "Let's see, Melton is four or more hours away, isn't it?" Glen asked. "Yes, and you would have to be away from your family a lot. But that was likely to happen anyway. This is not the way things should happen, but I need an answer right now. Will you do it? A lot of people will be very grateful." The decision was actually quite easy for Glen. Of course, the chance to coach swimming was the real draw. But he also felt that if he and Julie did not get some separation, things would blow up on them. The offer was almost too good to be true, and he accepted immediately. ------- "You mean you're going to be way out there for three months?" Julie asked in shock. "Yes. You knew I would have to do something like this before I graduated." "But, you'll have to get a place to stay there. It's too far to commute, and..." "Julie, I hate to say this, but I think it would be good for us to be apart for a while." "Apart? You mean like a separation?" The fear was evident in her question. As bad as things had gotten, separation was not something she had considered. "No. Well, kind of. It's something I would have to do anyway, and it would give us a chance to look at things without, um, well, you know what I mean." She did know, and she knew he was right. It was just the shock of admitting the need to be apart that she was struggling with. "Will you come home every weekend?" He paused quite a while before answering. "It will kill me not to see Libby, but I think it would be good for me to stay away for a few weeks, don't you?" She could not answer, and started to cry. Things had deteriorated to the point that he did not even feel he could hold her and comfort her. "I'll have a computer and we can E-mail. I'll call you and Libby as often as I can." ------- Whatever he had expected, the reality turned out to be much harder for Glen. Coming in cold with no preparation was bad enough, but the students' naturally predatory attitude toward substitute teachers made it even harder. In one way, though, it was just what he needed. It took every bit of his attention and energy, and for once, he could expect normal sleep. For the first two weeks, he only made brief calls home, and he spent most of the time trying to make a conversation with Libby. She did well for not yet being two, but it could not really be called conversation. With Julie, the talk was very matter of fact, just describing what he was doing. She cried every day after they hung up. Theresa was the one Julie unburdened herself with. She did some with Betty, too, but she felt close enough to her mother now to share her anguish. Theresa tried to be comforting and supportive, but it was tearing her up inside. Her daughter's whole situation was her fault, and she felt so helpless. Roland had to spend a long time comforting her after each of Julie's visits. After Glen had been gone for almost three weeks, Julie came to Betty and said "I guess it's time for me and Libby to move out, Betty." "WHAAAT? Why do you want to do that?" "I... I don't really want to, but it looks like I won't be your daughter-in-law too much longer." She barely got that out before the flood of tears started. Stunned and heartbroken for the girl and for her son, Betty was speechless for a moment, then told Julie to wait for her to come back. Fifteen minutes later, both Betty and Theresa walked into the master bedroom where Julie had been waiting. "Julie, Honey," Betty said softly, "we think it's time for you to tell Glen." "Tell him?... Tell him what?" "That you got pregnant on purpose," Betty answer gently. "Mother! You told her?" Julie shrieked. "No, no, Honey!" Betty assured her. "She never breathed a word. I suspected it from the first day." "You did? Then... but... how... why..." Julie became speechless for a minute as she tried to compose herself. "If you knew, how could you be so good to me? You should have hated me for ruining Glen's life!" "I had a good idea why you did it," Betty told her, causing Theresa to break into tears. "It was done. Glen loves you, and I love you, too. The only thing that made any sense was to do everything I could to help you two make it." "But if I tell him, I'll lose him!" Julie wailed. "A little while ago, you thought you were going to lose him anyway. Believe me, that's the last thing any of us want to happen. Julie, I've been afraid all along that your secret could wreck your marriage." "J... Julia said the same thing," Julie sniffed out. "But if I tell him, it's for sure." "Nothing is for sure, Honey," Betty corrected her, "except maybe that you two can't go on forever with a secret like that hidden. I think your only real chance is a fresh start with everything out in the open." "Have you and Julia been talking about this?" Julie asked suspiciously. "Oh no. You know Julia would never do something like that." "If... if it was so obvious to you, and to you too, Mom, how come Glen never suspected?" "I think he loves you so much he just couldn't think of you doing that," Betty responded, knowing that impact that statement would have. "So if I tell him, he'll know what I'm really like," Julie said bitterly. "Like I said, I think your only chance is a fresh start with no secrets." The three women sat in silence broken only by sniffles from all of them. Theresa, who had said nothing until then, spoke up. "Honey, I think you should write it all out in a letter to Glen. Then, I want to take it up to him on Saturday." "You? Why?" "I'm the one who drove you two into this situation. I want to believe I've done everything I can to fix it. I don't think you should go." "I think Theresa's right," Betty added. No more was said as the mothers waited for another round of Julie's sobbing to subside. At the end, Julie just nodded her head, and they all hugged and cried some more. ------- Chapter 20 It was late Saturday morning and Glen was just returning from the pool. Since his third day in Melton, he had worked out hard at the pool every day. The administration was so grateful to him for helping them out that they allowed him to swim off-hours when the pool was unused, and he took full advantage of it. The phone calls home had been so stressful that he headed for the pool immediately after each one. Taking a time of separation from Julie had been the right thing to do. He ached to hold Libby and play with her, but he would just have to endure it. He ached to hold and make love to Julie. The love was still there, as strong as ever. The... thing... the barrier... that had grown up between them was as puzzling as it was agonizing. Oh, he knew she was upset about having to move, and he knew she was unhappy about having to live on a teacher's salary. He himself was almost as upset about the move and he felt guilty about not having better prospects for providing for her and their children. Their children. That brought up the question of whether there would be any more children. Would there even be a Julie and Glen? Acknowledging the possibility of breaking up had been traumatic, but after a week away, he had to admit to himself that they were headed that way. They were definitely heading toward the point where being together caused more anger, tension, and unhappiness than comfort, affection, and security. He most definitely did not want a breakup. Like his parents, lifelong commitment was in his nature. On the other hand, he did not know how he could go on living with the way things were between them. How had they gotten to this point? How could they fix it? Did Julie harbor deep-seated anger at him for getting her pregnant? As usual, that Saturday morning, he wore just his Speedos with a sweatsuit over when he went to the pool. After his swim and a shower, he came home in just the sweatsuit. He was standing and thinking in the kitchenette area of his little studio apartment when there was a knock on the door. Almost absent-mindedly he opened it to be totally surprised by Theresa standing there. Her expression made him think that she was working very hard not to have any expression. "T... T... Theresa! What?... Why?... C... come in." "Thank you, Glen," Was all she said. "Sorry about the way I'm dressed," he told her. "I just got back from a workout. Let me go and change." "No," she said rather forcefully, then held out a letter. "This is from Julie. Please read it right now. I have to use your bathroom." Glen's hand shook as he reached out to take the letter. All he could think of was a 'Dear John'. Why had Theresa delivered it? He really could not even focus on that question, he was so shook up. Theresa and Betty had both stayed with Julie at her request and helped her compose the letter. It was hand-written: Dearest Glen, I love you with all my heart and I always will. That may be hard to believe after you learn what I did, but it is the truth. What I did, I did because I love you so desperately. I hope you can find it in your heart to read all of this. Glen, Darling, I got pregnant on purpose! I know what a terrible thing I did. That I killed your dream of swimming has haunted me every night since. Even worse, all of this time I've let you think my pregnancy was your fault. I don't know how I could have been so cruel. I got pregnant because it was the only way I could think of to keep from being separated from you. At the time, I was so mixed up I thought I would lose you if we were separated. Then, after I got pregnant, I was afraid I would lose you if you found out how. I know it was cowardly, but that is why I have kept it secret all this time. Now, I am deathly afraid I will lose you anyway, and it is all my fault. I have been concerned about things that should not be important. All that really matters is our love and Libby. I hope with all my heart that you can find a way to forgive and that we can get back to where we once were. If you cannot, my life will be ruined, but I will not be able to blame you. Whatever happens, I could not keep this terrible secret any longer. All my love forever, Julie Glen read the letter a second time, then closed his tear-filled eyes and laid his head back on the top of the couch. For many minutes he sat there motionless, barely able to isolate a coherent thought from the jumble that raced through his mind. When at last he took a deep breath, opened his eyes, and sat up, Glen received another shock. Theresa was kneeling on the floor right in front of him, naked. He just stared at her, unable to speak, so she broke the ice. "Glen, Honey, I am the one most responsible for what Julie did. I need to do everything I can to salvage my daughter's happiness." "You... you should put your clothes on. This isn't right." "Nothing about what happened is right, Glen. I... I need to be naked. It has become symbolic to me. It's a way to let you know that I am being as open and honest as I can. It's a way to demonstrate that this is a whole different person than the woman who did those terrible things. It's a way to show you how much shame I feel for what I have done. I don't deserve any dignity at all." "Theresa, you have a dignity that being naked can't change. I feel... I feel... dirty looking at you like this." "I'm the one that feels dirty, Glen," she insisted. "Before you make any decisions about Julie's letter, I need to tell you what happened the day before she blew up at you. It will help explain why I feel such shame. I am fighting for my daughter and I don't apologize for that. I hope you will have a better understanding of why she trapped you after you hear this." Theresa spent almost an hour on a detailed account of the fateful episode in the kitchen, that night, and the next morning. She purposely gave a very explicit version, reciting exact words that were said, describing positions and gestures in detail. She recounted the events after the blow-up as she remembered them. Glen had known that something terrible happened after he dropped Julie at home that Saturday, but she had never told him anything specific. He could hardly believe what Theresa was saying, spending most of the time with his mouth hanging open in shock. All the time she talked, Theresa stayed on her knees, upright in front of him. When she finished, she sagged back onto her heels and swayed slightly. Reluctant to touch her, Glen reached out for her hand and pulled her to the sofa beside himself. "Thank you," she said softly. Then she moved over close to him, put her arm through his, and rested her head on his shoulder. He stiffened and tried to lean away from her, glad that his sweatsuit had long sleeves to keep her bare breast from touching his skin. He was amazed and more than a little upset by her behavior. "Please, Glen, don't think I'm being slutty or anything like that. It's important for you to know how I feel about you. I love you, Glen. From what I did to you, that must be hard to believe. But seeing you with Julie, I know you are the right man to be her husband. And the right man to be my son-in-law. I am begging you not to change that." He was able to relax, and they just sat there in silence. She did not try to become any more intimate, and he did not try to disengage for several minutes. When he once again gave a deep sigh, she took his hand and entwined their fingers, just as lovers might do. By this time, he was starting to sense what she meant and why she was acting as she was. "Glen, do you think I am the same person I was back on that Saturday in the kitchen," she asked. "You know," he answered softly, "you really don't even look the same. You're not the same person at all." "Would I do any of those terrible things again?" she asked. "Never," was his answer. "Is Julie the same person she was that day?" "Ohhh. I see what you're getting at. But Theresa, she destroyed my dream." "Who destroyed it? The Julie of that day, or the one who cries her eyes out for you after every phone call?" "She does? I... I have to work it off in the pool," he mused. "See. You know you're supposed to be together. I've got to warn you, Glen, I'm going to make my case for you two getting back together every chance I get. I'm not even going to apologize for it. Who destroyed your dream, Glen? Which Julie? Is it right to punish the Julie waiting at home with Libby?" He was unable to answer. Having said that, Theresa got up and went to the front door. Opening it cautiously and peeking out, she reached outside and brought in first a cooler, then a grocery bag, then a small cosmetics case. She was shivering visibly when she closed the door. Glen overcame enough of his surprise to take the cooler and the bag to the kitchen counter while she took the case to the bathroom. There followed one of the weirdest days of Glen's life. Theresa fixed lunch, and they ate and chatted. Still naked, she noticed Glen forcing his eyes up from her nipples, and told him "You don't have to pretend you're not peeking. God, you'd better be! And for the last time, no! I'm not putting clothes on until I leave. Glen, this is important to me. I have to do it this way." Perhaps it was part of Theresa's plan, but Glen was constantly reminded of Julie as he watched her mother throughout the afternoon. Even many of her gestures and expressions were the same, not to mention her legs, her hips, her breasts, and... Hopefully, she hadn't seen the blush or the movement in the front of his sweats. How could he be getting aroused? Over his mother-in-law! On a day when his life had fallen apart even more. What was definitely Theresa's plan was to keep him from thinking about Julie's confession and what he was going to do about it. As relaxed as she seemed, she was constantly watching him for signs that he was pondering his options. She would quickly begin talking to him or move around in a way that would draw his attention to her naked body. After Gina's birth, she had been fanatical about getting back in shape, and thought she looked better than before she got pregnant. She had done it for Roland, but if it helped her current mission, so much the better. Right after reading Julie's letter was the time he was most likely to make an angry, rash decision. Then, and in the nights immediately following. Glen did not yet know it, but she planned to spend Saturday and Sunday nights naked in his bed with him. They would not have sex, but she hoped it would keep him from stewing over Julie all night long. Theresa had not lied to Glen about her reasons for being naked. What she had said was completely true. It was just that there were two other very good reasons. Distraction from a hurried decision was one. The other reason played on her resemblance to her daughter. She hoped to evoke constant images of Julie, both present and future, leaving him convinced that he wanted her with him. Around mid-afternoon, Glen told Theresa "You know, it's getting dark pretty early. If you don't leave soon, you won't even get to the freeway before dark. "Oh, didn't I tell you? I'm not leaving until you go to school Monday morning." After the events of the day, there should have been nothing that could surprise Glen. Wrong. "But... but... this place. The couch is too small to sleep on, and..." "You mean you're not willing to share your bed with your mother-in-law for a couple of nights?" she asked, barely able to restrain a laugh. "I didn't think I was that disgusting." Realizing he was losing badly in the teasing game, Glen had a flash of boldness. She was standing near him when she said that, and he gave her a playful swat on the bottom and said "You're the last person who has to go fishing for compliments." He only thought he had won a point because she grabbed his face in both hands and kissed him quickly but firmly on the lips. Then, she scampered giggling toward the bathroom. His heart almost stopped when she did that because she looked so much like Julie. Her bare ass cheeks did the same sexy little bounce and... He had to turn away to shield the bulge in his sweatpants. When Theresa came out of the bathroom a little later, Glen was serious as he said "Theresa, are you sure sleeping in my bed isn't carrying things too far? What would Roland think?" "Sweetie, it's not like we're going to have sex. It will just be... comfortable. Two people who care for each other sharing a small apartment for a couple of nights." She paused to read his expression, then said "But I have to tell you, Glen: if having sex with you was a requirement for you getting back together with Julie, I would do it in a heartbeat." That made him gasp. "But Roland would never stand for that." "No, he wouldn't. I would lose him." She looked him straight in the eye, seeing that he caught the full implication of what she had said. She would give up her happiness to buy her daughter's. This time, he duplicated her move from earlier, grabbing her face and kissing her briefly but hard. Then, he turned away to hide the tears - unsuccessfully. As he sat and watched her fix supper, he joked "I think the real reason you're naked is to try to distract me." Turning to face him, she said, "I didn't lie about my reasons, but that is another one - a very good one." At his look of surprise, she asked "Are you surprised I would do that?" "I'm surprised you would admit it," he told her. "I'll admit anything, Honey." Spreading her arms she continued "This is not a very good way to be secretive, is it?" "So you're sleeping with me for the same reason?" "Tell me, Glen: if you were alone tonight what would happen?" "I'd probably toss all night, thinking about what Julie did." "And what else?" He hesitated for a moment, then his shoulders sagged and he spoke softly. "I would probably get angry and plan all kinds of revenge." He was not able to look up at her when he finished. He was sitting on a bar stool at the counter that was the kitchen eating area. She came up to the other side, put her elbows on the counter with her shin resting on her hands. The formica was cold on her breasts as they rested on it, but she thought she was giving him a provocative sight and did not flinch. "I warned you, I will do anything in my power to help my daughter keep her husband. If it takes distracting you, blowing you, or even fucking you, I will do it." She intended to shock him with her crude words, and saw that she had succeeded. "Theresa, I would never... I don't like to hear you talk that way." "I don't like it either, Glen. I just had to be sure you knew how serious I was. You cannot imagine how I feel seeing you and Julie in this trouble that I caused." In an attempt to defuse the emotions a little, he told her "It wasn't just you, Theresa." "But Vince would never do anything about it. He wouldn't think he was responsible. I'm the one that has to try to fix it." ------- Dinner was quiet but nice. Afterward, they sat and watched TV. Theresa unashamedly snuggled close to him. At one point, she took his arm and put it around her. "Should I get a blanket, he asked?" "Nope, this is much better." "You're not hiding anything from me, just making me figure it out, aren't you," he asked suddenly. "Oh? Why do you say that?" "You're doing everything you can to remind me of Julie, aren't you?" "Is it working?" In answer, he made the exceptionally bold move of tickling her under the arm, accidentally brushing the side of her breast as he did. She swung around and got on her knees beside him, sitting back on her heels as she faced him. Her expression was serious. "I already told you I was trying to keep you from making any hurried, angry decisions about Julie. I'm also trying to keep her in front of your mind: what her body looks like. How it feels to have her sit beside you, sleep beside you, have some fun with you. When you come to making a decision, I want to be sure you remember what you'll be missing if you don't forgive her. There! Is that honest enough?" This time, he cupped her chin in one hand and looked her in the eye for a moment before giving her a brief kiss. To lighten the mood before getting in bed, which she knew he was nervous about, she made a pretense of sniffing the sheets and pantomiming a bad smell. He surprised her by hauling out a new set, and they horsed around a little as they put on the clean ones. ------- Sunday morning, Glen had to work on some lesson plans that he had not gotten to Saturday. Theresa read a book she had brought, not wanting to bother him with the TV. The apartment was just one room, the bathroom being the only separated space. After he had been working a while, he looked over at her and thought how easy it was to be around her, even in that tiny space. Julie was like that, too. At lunch, he asked her "Would it weaken your campaign too much if you got dressed and I should you around the town? You did have some clothes under that coat, didn't you?" With a playful swat, she told him "Of course I did. Did you really think I'd drive up here in nothing but a coat?" "At this point, nothing you would do would surprise me: if it was for your kids." She caught her breath and stopped the potential tears at just a little moisture. Then she brightened and said "I'd love to see the town. Why don't we go a little later, and I'll buy you dinner." At dinner in a moderate restaurant, she asked him "Can I say something without offending you?" At his nod she went on "I saw dress shirts, coats, and ties in your closet. Do you wear them to school?" "Yeah, I knew I had a big challenge getting any credibility with the students. Mom and Dad thought dressing more formally might help, and they bought some stuff for me." "Well, here's a problem Julie's been having that I don't think she would mention to you." She proceeded to describe the unfair comparisons he had been subjected to. He was very thoughtful and thanked her for the heads up. Around eight o'clock, she could see that he was antsy, and had an inspiration. "Glen, don't you usually work out in the pool every day?" "Yeah, but with you here..." "Well, go! In fact, can I come along?" "Do you have a suit?" "Is there anyone in the school?" "Nope, it's completely unstaffed from Sunday noon." "Then I don't need a suit," she giggled. "I never got to skinny dip when I was a kid. My folks were too strict. This is my chance. I'll get the towels," she said as she bounced toward the bathroom. God, she was like Julie. "Theresa! What if..." "Oh, come on! You're not going to go all shy and conservative now, are you?" His only possible response was a shake of the head. At the pool, she watched as he dropped his sweats at the edge of the pool. "Hey! How come I'm the only one skinny dipping?" she chided him upon seeing his Speedo. "Not that much is covered there. Hmmm. Maybe I should start going to swimming meets." This was punctuated with a laugh. 'Damn women', he thought, 'always getting the upper hand, putting the pressure on'. He had a panicked thought about a possible erection AFTER he impulsively stripped off his suit. Walking toward her, he said "One of the few things I've learned about women is that they tell each other everything, especially if it's anything to do with sex. I think this would be best kept a secret. In fact, there are some tank suits in the women's locker room. I'm going to get one so you can tell Julie that I did. Just leave out the fact that you never wore it, OK?" "Why, Glen Voss! Julie and I must be rubbing off on you. That's wonderfully devious!" The way her breasts bounced as she laughed forced him quickly into the pool to retard and hide the swelling of his penis. She spent a lot of the next hour just watching, in awe of the power in his strokes. ------- Monday morning, Glen was awakened at daybreak by Theresa's hand gently caressing his face. As he came to awareness, he felt her breasts pressed against his arm and his side. He started to shrink away, but she gentled him. "It's okay. It's okay. I'm not going to attack you or try to make you be unfaithful in any way. They're just boobs, and they feel good against you." "I heard that!" he responded, waking up rapidly. As he did, he became aware of his morning glory and twisted his hips reflexively away from her. "Don't! I know it's there and I know why. Part of me would love to grab hold of it, but that would dishonor both of our partners. Just don't worry about it. Unless you snuck one in, you've had no relief for two days, so it's probably extra hard this morning, huh?" "I woke you up early because there are some things I want to say before I go. First, you are a beautiful man, inside and out. I love you like a son, only in a different way. You can't believe how hard it was to come up here and be naked with you like this. Yet, I knew I had to do it, and I'm sure it was the right thing." "I hope with all my heart that I have helped to save my daughter's marriage. After being here, I would feel even worse if she loses you. You and Roland are two of a kind: you're unique men. I want you for Julie so much it hurts." "I've done everything I can to persuade you to take Julie back. I'm not going to ask you if it worked, but I pray that it has." "Glen, we are going to see each other in the future. If you and Julie break up," and her voice caught at that point, "we'll still be connected through Terry and Ellie. See, our families are really all tangled together. Hopefully, you and Julie will be together again and I'll see you all the time." "Whenever we see each other, I don't want you to be embarrassed because we've been like this. I want there to be a special love between us, and I want you to feel free to show it. Maybe I'm out of line, but I'm guessing that at some point you've been with both Betty and Ellie like this." She felt him about to respond and put a finger over his lips. "It's OK. I hope they've had that good fortune. If you could just treat me like you do your mother and your sister for the rest of my life, I could die happy." Theresa leaned over and gave him another brief but firm kiss on the lips before getting out of bed. He watched as she moved gracefully toward the bathroom. On the day that Julie forced her mother and father to greet them naked, Theresa had been absolutely terrified for Glen to see her. Now, she walked almost regally away from him, sharing the beauty of her naked body without apparent concern. He considered it a gift. In the two nights they had shared a bed, no touching had occurred that he would be afraid to relate to Julie, with the exception of the last few minutes. Their bodies had made contact during the night several times, but nothing at all of a sexual nature had transpired. It had been... comfortable... intimate... reassuring. And it had made him wish it was Julie. Though it was still early, she fixed a nice breakfast, and he was not about to turn it down. As if sensing his need, she left before he took his shower, and he took the opportunity to relieve himself - twice. He had thought he knew his mother-in-law, but he really had no idea. The depths, the passion, the courage of the woman blew him away. If that was what Julie was becoming, would he not be a fool to reject her? But she had destroyed his dream! Because of her, there was no chance of international competition in the future. Coaching at the college level was probably an impossibility, as well. The major goals of his life were now out of reach, because of her. But Theresa had said it: was it really Julie that did that? Wasn't it really some desperate teenager under more pressure than she could stand. Wasn't it an abused young woman who had been warped by her parents' strange mating ritual? Was the girl that did that to him any more his wife than the woman who pushed her into it was his mother-in-law? Would it do any good to punish his wife for what that tortured teen did? Julie had decided it did no good to punish her mother. Throughout Monday and Tuesday, the debate raged in his mind. He had not called Julie since Friday night, and could not bring himself to do it Monday night. Besides the big deception, there were the issues that had driven them apart recently. Somehow, though, he knew that if he could get past the intentional pregnancy, everything else would work itself out with relative ease. ------- Tuesday night, he was once again unable to deal with talking to Julie. All she would want to know was whether he could forgive her; whether they could stay together. He did not know what he would say. About eight-thirty, he went over to the pool. He had been doing freestyle and breast stroke laps for about twenty minutes when he turned over to do backstrokes. He saw Carly standing at poolside watching him. Seeing that she had been noticed, Carly said "God, it's impressive to watch you! You swim like a dolphin." Surprised at having his solitary workout observed, he responded instinctively "Yeah, my sister calls me 'Flip', after Flipper the Dolphin. "It fits," she told him. Carly was in her mid twenties. She was in her third year in Melton and made no bones about her desire to work her way up and out of there. She had glommed onto Glen the day he arrived, and flirted with him quite openly. Since they were the only ones under thirty on the staff, it was natural that they should interact. Glen suspected the kind of interaction she wanted, though, and had scrupulously avoided any encouragement. "How'd you get in?" he asked. "Janitor owes me a favor," she responded with a grin. "Mind if I join you?" "Be my guest," he said, "I'll be doing my thing over in this lane, though." "Fine by me," she said, then proceeded to strip naked on the edge of the pool. Too surprised to react at first, when she pushed off her panties, he exclaimed "Carly!" "I came for something I left in my room. Didn't think to bring a suit." "There are tank suits in the locker room." "You mean you don't like this one?" she said with a mock pout. She jumped into the pool and pushed her way to where he stood in waist-deep water. There was much to like about the suit she wore. She had a trim, athletic build, and was well-toned. Though not qualifying as beautiful, she was quite attractive. It was obvious that she was on the prowl. When it was apparent that she was going to come right up until they were touching, he reached out and grasped her upper arms to hold her away. "Carly, you know I'm married." "Yep, and I know you've been here for over three weeks by yourself. I also know you've said very little about your wife, so I'm guessing you're on the outs with her. There's no one for me to play with in this hick town. I'm horny, you're a hunk, and I'll bet you need it, too." Glen liked Carly. She was bright and vivacious. If she had not been so blatant, they might have been able to flirt around a little, but that's all it would ever have been. Bending the truth some, he told her "I don't know where you got that idea about Julie and I, Carly, but no way will I be unfaithful to her. Not even a little bit." As he spoke, it suddenly hit him: if he and Julie broke up, would he be reduced to this? He had a soul mate, someone he would be happy to spend his life with; someone who would be like Theresa in twenty years. There was one big problem: the terrible thing she had done. But was it enough to throw it all away and start over again? Was there even another soul mate out there for him? Could he ever find her? Wasn't the Julie he had worth far more than anything bad she could do other than forsake him for another? Carly watched him quizzically as those thoughts ran through his mind. His hands still held her arms. "Does that mean I have to go put on a suit?" she pouted. "You can stay like that. I sure won't mind," he laughed, "but we just swim and talk, OK?" "I heard old married farts were no fun," she joked. "I guess that was right." He restrained his urge to retaliate, not wanting to send out any signals that could be misconstrued. "Can't you at least take off your little suit, too?" she pled. "'Fraid not," he told her. "It's private property." "Hummmph! Will I ever get to meet this lucky bitch... I mean wife?" "I think so, Carly. Pretty soon, in fact." "Seriously, Glen, I'm glad there's no problem. You're a good guy. You can't blame me for trying, can you?" ------- His first call when he got home from the pool was to Theresa. She broke into tears of relief when he told her what he wanted. "Honey, if she can't get the days off, she'll just quit. I'll make sure of it!" The next call was to Julie. Her 'hello' sounded frightened, and his heart went out to her. "Julie, we're going to be OK. I love you. I'm trying to arrange for you come out here and stay until we go home for Thanksgiving next week?" "Really? You mean it? Oh, God, Glen, I've been about dying here. I thought I'd lost you!" That's all she could say before the tears took over. ------- He wasn't sure how they arranged it, but Julie arrived early Friday evening on a commuter flight. When she saw Glen waiting for her in a coat and tie just outside security, she almost swooned. She had almost forgotten how good he looked like that. There were several chuckles from bystanders as she ignored deportment and ran squealing to leap into his arms. He spun her around several times as he kissed her, and started heading for the baggage claim before he even set her down. As they waited by the carousel, he asked her "What kind of restaurant would you like to go to for supper?" "Are you kidding?" she almost screamed. "I don't want to waste one more minute with your clothes on." Then, she slapped her hand over her mouth and giggled as she saw the expression of a nearby woman who had overhead. When the woman called out "You go girl!", she turned as red as he had ever seen her. Leaning into him, she whispered "Mom got me so jealous and so hot I can't stand it!" "But I stayed dressed when she was here," he protested. "Details!" she declared. In the car, she calmed down after a few minutes, then said "Glen, I'm so..." "Unh uh! Apologies are discussed only on the weekend!" "Oh, Mom told me to give you this," and she handed him an envelope. "I'm surprised she's passing love letters through me, though," she said, trying to keep a straight face. "Well, since you know all about my affair with your mother, why don't you just read the letter. "Oh, wow!" she said when she opened the letter and saw four fifty dollar bills. "The note says 'Wine and dine Julie with this until I bring Libby up Sunday afternoon..." "God, I've missed that little doll," Glen interrupted. "... 'I'll stay in a motel Sunday night and... '" "Like hell she will!" he exclaimed. "Just can't wait to get back in bed with my mother, huh?" she teased. "You gonna make her strip this time, too?" "Hey, didn't she tell you how many times I told her to get dressed?" "Suuurrrrre you did!" she said with another giggle. "There's more here: 'I am so thrilled I will get to see you all the time, now. I do love you, Glen'. Geez, I think she loves you more than she love me." "Hah! Not hardly. There's one thing she said that I'm sure she didn't tell you about." He described Theresa's comment about fucking him if that's what it took. That ended Julie's teasing for a while. When they got in the apartment, Julie started undressing him before he even put her bag down. "Shouldn't we order some food first?" he asked. "Neanderthal!" she spat at him with a playful slap. "How can you think of food at a time like this. What I need is cock! Your cock!" Sensing a perfect tease opportunity, he pressed on. "While we're waiting for it, I'll have time to get you warmed up." "Warmed up! I haven't made it four hours on a pair of panties since you called. When I saw you in your coat and tie, I could feel it running down my leg. Warmed up! I'll show you warmed up!" She frantically unbuckled his belt and jerked down his slacks and underwear. Then she whipped her panties down from under her skirt and jumped up to wrap her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. "Remember where it goes?" she mouthed around a kiss. He remembered. There by the door of his tiny pad, with him still in coat and tie and her with skirt hiked up around her waist, he slid into her slick heat. She squealed at first penetration and came as he hit bottom. He was just as primed, and her contractions took him along. Their reunion coupling had taken less than a minute. Since he had expected her to be rather maudlin when they reunited, Glen was thrilled at the playful, teasing mood she came off the plane with. After their quick 'hello' fuck, she continued in the same vein. Ignoring the soiling of clothes or carpet, she let herself down from his grasp. Then she faced him with hands on hips and complained "Hey, Husband of mine. Were you planning to feed me, or do I have to live on love?" More than willing to play along, he retorted with a snort "My last weekend bimbo at least brought food with her. And she cooked it naked, too." "Pervert!" she spat over her shoulder as she headed for the bathroom. "Pepperoni, mushrooms, and black olives." As he was calling in the order, she knelt naked beside him and began removing his shoes and socks. Just as he hung up, she pulled down the pants he had just hoisted up to make the call. She helped him step out of the pants, then she made a show of walking around him and examining him. "Yup! I think that's your uniform for the weekend. You know, I saw a picture of one of those Chippendales guys. All he had on was a fake collar and a tie. You'd look great like that. 'Course he had on a g-string, which I don't want in the way at all." As they ate their pizza, he had to ask her. "Honey, how come you're so happy and playful today. I was afraid you'd be kinda weepy. After all, it's been a rough time." "You can blame Mom and Betty for that. They sat me down and asked me what were the best times in our marriage. They said that's what we needed to recreate this weekend. If you're willing to forgive me... ooops, sorry, that's for tomorrow, isn't it... I want to get back to the best times. OK with you?" "As if you had to ask. One thing though: do I really have to keep this coat and tie on?" ------- Friday night, Julie insisted they go to the pool. She had packed her raciest bikini, which produced not a single objection from Glen. Julie wanted to skinny dip, but he objected because there was a janitor on duty. While they relaxed at the side of the pool, he told her about Tuesday night and Carly, and how it had helped seal his decision. "Poor girl! Let's invite her out to dinner tomorrow night." "You're kidding, right?" "No, she sounds like a good person who's just lonely. It didn't hurt anything for her to flash her goodies at you. Seems like it's easy for women to do that." Julie had big plans for the rest of Friday night, but when Glen insisted on a massage after their swim, she fell asleep after ten minutes. He managed to ease her under the covers and crawl in with her without waking her. Sometime in the wee hours, he awakened to find Julie settling down onto his already-rigid cock. Seeing him awake, she complained "How could you let me fall asleep. I wanted to make long, slow love." "What's, unh, wrong with, uh, right now?" he managed to get out as she started bouncing up and down on him. "Right now I feel the need to fuck your brains out," she hissed. "That works, too!" he grunted. ------- Carly had dinner and a swim with them Saturday evening, with suits. She and Julie hit it off nicely, in fact so nicely that Carly insisted on baby-sitting Libby so they could take Theresa out Sunday night. As it turned out, both Theresa and Roland delivered Libby. It took father and daughter an hour to complete the essential greetings. Libby was not thrilled with being left in a strange place with a strange woman, but it turned out that Carly was among the oldest in a large family, and was an ace with babies. Libby hardly noticed when they walked out the door. Dinner was at an upscale place, one of only a couple in town that was open on Sunday evening. It was not at all crowded, and they had an excellent, leisurely dinner. Afterward, Glen lifted a wine glass and said "To Theresa: a woman who shows how far love will go for her children." After the clinking of classes, he told Roland "I'm sure you're aware of what a treasure you have here." "I'm finding it out more and more every day," Roland replied, earning him a tearful hug from Theresa. As they stood up from the table, the women announced that the next stop was the pool. "But Carly..." Glen started to object. "She already knows. She's fine," Julie assured him. The men just shrugged at each other. "But we're all dressed up," Roland pointed out. "Hangers are in the car," Theresa explained. "And sweatsuits for afterwards." Mother and daughter were obviously a combination not to be trifled with. At the pool, the men came out of the locker room first, and chatted as they waited politely for the women. They might not have been so relaxed had they known the plan. They were both a little surprised at the women's modesty as the both came out wrapped in towels. That was a very minor surprise compared to what happened next. Both women walked up to their husbands and yanked their trunks right down to the floor. Quickly, they stepped back and dropped their towels, revealing nothing underneath. Both men were startled, but neither felt it manly to object to a skinny dip with the beautiful mother and daughter. Roland and Julie were a bit uncomfortable with each other at first, but neither let it hinder their fun. "There may never be another time like this," Theresa explained, "and it was just too good to pass up." They all horsed around a while, then Glen went to the far lane and began powering through his laps. Roland ended up standing on the edge and watching him, lost in concentration. Julie noticed, and came to stand beside him. "He really is powerful, isn't he?" Roland asked. "Have you seen his high school record," she responded. "He had legitimate Olympic potential. That's why it's so amazing that he forgave me for what I did. Roland, if you hadn't encouraged Mom to do what she did last weekend, I don't think we'd be together now. It must have been hard to let her do that." "Not really, Julie. I'm aware of where I stand in importance compared to you kids, and I'm fine with that." "Well, I can tell you that you're closing on first place very fast. I find myself wishing you had been my Dad." With that, she put a hand on his shoulder and kissed him on the cheek. That little show of affection threatened to cause problems for Roland in his middle extremity. He quickly changed the subject. "How much has Glen lost since high school?" "Oh, I'm sure he's lost some. He has never stopped working out, though, and it's been more frequent since things got bad between us. Why?" "Well, I can't say anything, but will you try to do this: don't let him slack off on the training just because things are better. Think you can do that?" "I'll sure try. Think you can tell me why sometime soon?" "I hope so." ------- Back at the apartment, Julie and Glen thanked Carly profusely for her help, and Julie told her "Thank you for being a friend to Glen while he's here. You may not have seen it last night, but we've just come through a really rough patch. He needed a friend." "Well, I kind of suspected that, but from what I saw last night, I know what I want if I can ever find a relationship." ------- Julie and Glen never really talked about their problems over the weekend, finally, Tuesday, after they made love for the second time, she could not ignore it any longer. "Glen, how come I didn't lose you? I mean I've been bitching about having to move; bitching about the lousy teachers' pay; upset because we never do anything exciting. It was so bad we were hardly talking when you came out here. Then, I admitted that I trapped you and ruined your future. I was sure that would be the last straw." He was thoughtful for a moment, then he told her "Maybe when you really love someone, there is no such thing as a last straw." Then he lightened the mood a bit by saying "I once heard something from the Bible about forgiving seventy times seven times. Heck, you haven't screwed up anywhere near that many times." His attempt at levity earned him a brief smile that was overwhelmed by tears of joy." When her crying subsided a bit, he told her "You shouldn't say you ruined my future, Honey. I've got you in my future. And Libby. And hopefully some more like Libby. It's just a matter of understanding what's really important. And look, we've got an awesome family around us, too. I know we've got some tough times ahead, but don't you think things look pretty good?" "Oh, God, I love you!" she cried as she tried to prove it by melting their bodies together. "I'm learning what's important, too. And all that stuff I bitched about and got upset about looks pretty stupid from right here." "No, if it bothers you, it's not stupid. But we have to talk about it, right? And I have to be willing to consider other things besides teaching, too." It was a good thing Wednesday before Thanksgiving was a pretty laid back day at school, because Glen was definitely going into it with a sleep deficit. Well after midnight, Julie asked "Darling, does it seem to you that the sex is better than ever, now. You just seem so much more... I don't know... possessive, maybe? In control? You just turn me on like never before." "I think your right, Sweetie. You just seem to throw yourself into it and try to eat me up. It's like there's nothing else in the world that matters to you." "There isn't! There isn't!" What left the young couple in such wonder was the removal of that monstrous barrier of guilt that had prevented complete, whole-hearted intimacy ever since they were married. ------- Epilogue 'God, how I love the smell of chlorine' Betty thought, realizing how ridiculous that would sound to anyone else. But it was true. Being around a swimming pool was a stimulant for her, especially when one of her own was competing, and competing well. "Just who are you people rooting for, anyway? Addison or State?," a curious woman sitting next to their group asked. Julie piped up "We're rooting for that hunk over there talking to the Addison coach. "And the State babe that looks just like her," Terry added, giving Betty a one-armed hug. "They're our kids," Alan explained, hugging Betty from the other side. "And how about you?" the overly-nosy neighbor asked of Theresa and Roland. "He's my son-in-law, and she's my future daughter-in-law", Theresa said over the tiny shoulder of the infant Nathan in her arms. "Daddy and Aunt Ellie swim really fast," Explained three-year-old Libby seriously. "Unca G'en win alla time," was Gina's slightly less fluent contribution from Roland's lap. "I was just lucky enough to marry into this awesome family," Roland explained. Betty gave him a playful jab. "Oh, sure! Without you, this, one of the happiest days of our lives, would never have happened. ------- Roland's business had two parts. One was as a venture capitalist for low-cap startups. Most had no hope of ever going public, but many made handsome returns for their investors. The other part was managing the finding and placement of private contributions for non-profit projects. A few years back, a major donation had been designated for an ultra-modern natatorium at Addison University, the highly regarded local private college. The donation stipulated that the University must exert every effort to gain the top levels of competitive swimming. Previously, there was no swimming team. A separate annuity had been set up to hire the best coaches. Roland had known Glen had been a swimmer, and even knew he had ranked top in the state in high school. He had just assumed, however, that his swimming career ended when he gave up the scholarship. He was enough of a sports fan to understand the incredible level of training needed for the highest levels of swimming. Seeing Glen swim that night at Melton had given him an idea. He had a lot of influence with the Athletic Department at Addison, and particularly with the swimming program. The new pool structure would open in the summer, and Addison would compete in NCAA swimming in the fqll. They were scrambling to build a coaching staff and a competitive team. One of the assistant coaches was local, and he remembered Glen from his high school days. Unbeknownst to Glen, the coach was hovering around the pool with a stopwatch for a couple of Glen's after-work workouts. Though Glen did not understand why, Julie had almost demanded that he continue swimming after work. She claimed it was really the best time for the whole family's schedule, adding seductively that she did not want her stud's body to weaken even one little bit. One night when Glen was off, Julie said "Why don't you work out at the usual time tomorrow, even if you're not working? I'll go with you." Women sometimes asked crazy things, but the rebirth of their marriage was going so well he would do anything for her. The next morning, the same coach was there, but another college-aged guy was doing laps. After watching Glen for a few minutes, he approached him and asked "Care for a little just-for-fun race? Say 200 meters? What's your best stroke?" A week later, the new Addison coach came to the house to offer Glen a full scholarship for three years. Because the Extension did not have competitive sports, he had not used up his eligibility. Only his age cost him the one year. After that, things happened fast. Julie was no longer reluctant to accept anything from her mother, and with a tuition deal Roland managed to wangle, she enrolled at Addison as well. It took a lot of convincing, but the couple let Roland pay for a tiny studio near campus. Most of the time they commuted home because of Libby. On their busiest class days, though, they stayed over while Betty watched Libby. Theresa had delivered Nathan just after school started. Thus it was that Julie and Glen got a good part of their college dream after all. It was different because they already had Libby. And it was a sacrifice because they became even more dependent on their parents' help. But it was wonderful, too. And thus it was that Betty experienced the newest high point in her life: watching her two children compete in a dual meet, State at Addison. Glen had been invited to the Olympic Trials in six months and that would be another incomparable thrill. ------- The End ------- Posted: 2005-01-17 Last Modified: 2005-10-09 / 10:09:51 am Version: 1.10 ------- http://storiesonline.net/ -------