Storiesonline.net ------- Kayla's Flight (Original) by PuffDragon Copyright© 2008 by PuffDragon ------- Description: **AN: This is the original version.** After an alien race virtually annihilates Kayla's planet, survivors struggle to rebuild, creating a new society. A former mining and agricultural plant must now form around the remaining core of its military on whom they depend on both for transportation and defense. Kayla's brilliance and physical tenacity allow her to join the newly reform Air Academy, the most prestigious school either before or after the attacks. Codes: Mf cons rom reluc het ScFi PostApoc 1st slow Mil ------- ------- Author Note I started this story five years ago when I graduated from USAF navigator training. The walk back from the jet after my last flight is what sparked this whole story, the feeling that I finally "made it." However, the writing style, the first person POV, make this an amateurish work at best. I had let Kayla and her story fall to the way side in favor of Last American Bomber. She would have continue to sink into obscurity except for one person who said "you know, Kayla's flight could totally be a sequel if you changed the back story a bit." Mind. Blow. So, I am currently working on editing and expanding the back story to make it fall in line with LAB. This story will remain up under an "Original Version" heading so that fans can go back and see how/where/why this story started. ------- Chapter 1 I always have a hard time starting this story. With so many moving parts, I find it hard to pin point where to start. My mother always encouraged me to start at the beginning and tell it to the end. I don't think it's that simple. So here is what I can tell you: I can tell you where I've been, where I'm at, and where I'm going. That seems simple enough. How to tell you where I've been? Well, if you're reading this, then you know it's been about five years since the Rhashi attacked the planet. The little shits were almost human in shape, but inhumanly violent in nature. They came quickly and left almost complete annihilation in their wake. I live on what used to be arguably one of the most prosperous human colonies in the galaxy. No shit! We had a thriving population of 2.3 million only 67 years after Landing. That's pretty respectable, I don't care who you are. With the minerals, ores, and textiles imported off planet, we had quickly worked our way out of the initial debt all colonial planets accrue. Our prosperity was not long lived though. From the first contact with our distant early warning drones, or DEWDs, to the time they had landed, murder, pillaged, and plundered almost all the population was a mere three days. The colonist still alive after the first day rallied the meager military forces and fought the Rhashi. In the end they won, or maybe the Rhashi got bored, but it was a Pyrrhic victory. Only a bare handful of us had survived. What had once been a thriving planet of 2.3 million had been reduced to barely three thousand. Clearly, what had been was gone. Someday we might get around to writing history books and they'll probably sound like this: "Fearing a second attack the survivors scavenged what they could and fled to the uninhabited southern continent, taking only what could be fit into the available aircraft and subspace fighters. The entire social structure had to be reorganized from a mining and farming community into a military unit. From the smallest child to the few remaining senior citizen, everyone received basic military training". They were taught to fight and survive in the more harsh conditions of the southern continent. While the Rhashi had attacked the ground forces with deadly accuracy they had neglected the air and space force. One who had been captured and tortured into talking told his captors that this was because they considered those forces negligible, a non-threat. So, with this knowledge the survivors created a small ground force, mostly for border defenses, but made their main focus a quick and deadly air and space force. Those who excelled at the more academic aspects of military training were sent to The Air Academy. Those lucky few who passed went on to fly the small fleet. The Rhashi attacked when I was only 14. At the time I had been doing preliminary training to be a mine engineer, I had been apprenticed to my father and was working in the mines the day of the attacks, which is all that saved me. My team and I had been nearly 3 thousand feet deep in the mine testing the newest iron seam for purity. When the Rhashi first hit Earth my father radioed down that we were to stay put, not to move until he said we were safe again. I never heard from him again. After 8 hours we lost all contact with the surface and made the choice to start ascending. Half way up the power was cut and we had to climb the rest of the way out. By the time we made it the attack was over and only a few remained. My father and mother had both died along with the only other blood relative I had, an aunt on my mother's side. Honestly, I don't remember much of the first week. Any survivors trekked to the planet's main city, trying to find loved ones, answers, and hope. The decision to move was made quickly. With only a scant 3,000 people there was no way we could rebuild from the rubble, not to mention the grim task of burying over 2 million people. Anything that could be used was moved south and the city was abandoned. Fate, though weeping for me, must have smiled the day I left, because I was put into one of the small, fast attack planes. All the children under sixteen had been grouped together to go on a large plane south. Like everyone else, I felt scared and alone. I pushed my way to the edge of the group so I could get a better view of the fighter ships being prepped for launch. As I waited, a young pilot of one of the jets approached me and offered me a ride. He told me that his copilot had been killed in the attack and he wanted an extra body in his jet, mostly so he would have someone to talk to. Still dazed from the recent events I just nodded numbly and followed him to his jet. It's hard to describe how it feels to be in the cockpit of a jet. You almost feel like you become part of it. Between the scream of air rushing over the canopy and the whining engines the throbbing noise blends with your own pulse making you feel like a part of it. It enthralls you, captivating all five senses and fills you with a feeling of sheer power. It was what I truly needed at that point. With no other living relations and racked with survivors guilt I had started sinking into myself and may have become suicidally depressed. On the two-hour flight south the pilot talked to me, trying to calm my sobs, and eventually the conversation turned to my apprenticeship, the only thing I seemed able to talk about without breaking into tears. He told me that he too had been apprenticed to a mining job when he was younger, but had been selected to fly before finishing his training. He proceeded to quiz me on my former job and other things I didn't think were related but he seemed impressed by the speed and accuracy of my answers. He told me that one day he would love to see me fly his jet and that if it were in his power he'd get me there. I giggled then straightening in my seat. I told him that I would love this job, but didn't think his planes would fly much longer; we lacked a fuel source. Miffed, he grudgingly admitted that: yes, that might be a problem. Still at the end of that amazing flight he scribbled my name on a spare bit of paper and wished me well, again wishing me well and hoping that one day I would come be a pilot like him. During the next frantic weeks of organizing and building my mind would wander back to that flight, the freedom of the clouds and feel of 33,000 pounds of thrust under your control. Somewhere deep down I wished that what that plane captain had said would come true, but at the end of six months of hard physical labor and intensive military training, I had all but forgotten the flight, the promise, and the pilot. ------- Chapter 2 Life in the new camp was hard. Ok, that's an understatement. Life was beyond hard. With so few people administrators found it almost impossible to start a new town. The survivors may have died in the first weeks alone had it not been for some extreme good fortune. The previously uncharted southern continent was not rich in minerals as the northern one had been, but it was abundant with edible flora and fauna. The site for the camp also came as a bonus. It was found only 17 hours after the decision to move was made and fit all the requirements: close to water, easily defensible, with a hearty topsoil capable of producing a rich food source. The main town itself was built on top of what may have been a plateau thousands of years before, but had accumulated several feet of rich soil in the mean time and had navigable slopes to the valleys below. Despite the rich location the administration, later renamed The Counsel, found it difficult to motivate thousands of exhausted and grief stricken people. Only the thought that the Rhashi would win if they all died kept them moving the first few weeks as they built new shelters. I found myself herded in with the other newly orphaned children. We lived day to day, spending our mornings receiving military training from adults who'd had it before and afternoons working alongside them to fortify the new shelters. After a few months the crude buildings we first lived in were transformed into livable housing. As time went by the remaining pilots were able to bring back more and more equipment from our former home and rebuilding efforts progressed exponentially. As adults worked to carve out a living as their forefathers had done the children moved from basic training and building into more advanced defensive theory and exercise, as well as what might have been standard schooling in the old days. Children who showed aptitude for certain things were encouraged to re-apprentice themselves, a vestige of the old way of life. Adults who found children who excelled were encouraged to foster them in their homes. Soon the 783 children who had first occupied the children's barracks were reduced to some 457 as people began the fostering project. Older children, however, were not as likely to be fostered as most, like me, would "be adults soon enough" and didn't need paternal care. The Counsel deemed us capable of caring for ourselves within the confines of the barracks and were only required to attend our classes and our work groups. Otherwise our time was our own. I would have liked to say I spent my time doing something constructive, but mostly I sketched in my coveted notepad, one of the few left and dreamed about soaring through sun silvered clouds. My abilities, both physical and mental, did not go unnoticed. On my 15th birthday I was told I had been selected for the newly reformed Air Academy. The airport had been one of the first things to be rebuilt, but not the Academy. A debate had raged through the Counsel soon after moving. The Counsel deemed that there was a high enough pilot to jet ratio to sustain us for a few years but the pilots argued back that they wouldn't live forever and by the time they were ready to kick the bucket, a class started now would be mature enough to bear the responsibility. It took six months, but the school was constructed out of a few small buildings on the edges of the town. Once the buildings were built for it the classes started in small batches, ten promising youth at a time, no more. Over time the community became more self sufficient and housing continued to be improved. From single person sheds and shacks it was decided to consolidated resources and multifamily dwellings began to emerge. Buildings were fashioned like apartments, each holding 8 units designed to comfortably house a family of four. The Academy took the idea and ran with it, stating that since its present curriculum required such time demands from its students they should be rewarded with better, closer housing. So the cadet dorms were built. One, larger set of dorms for males and a smaller annex for the females. In one day I went from living in the children's barracks to the cadet dorm. The transition was mind blowing to me. The children's barracks had once housed some 783 children, ranging from infancy to age 16. They were overseen by the few brave mothers, mostly the ones who lacked the temperament from a really military life or who had lost their own children. From my small, neat bunked bed in a room I shared with 90 other preteen and teen aged girls to a 2 person room in the newly built cadet housing was a le ap. The first day in my new home I sighed and allowed myself a happy smile as I lay down on the bed. While big enough for two people it was all for me. Two people, I thought, blushing at the idea of even snuggling up to a boy. Pushing the errant thoughts aside, I gave the room a good once over. It was small, but far better than what I was accustomed too. Two beds occupied the main space and faced the door. Set flush to the wall next to each bed was a small desk for us to study at presumably. The real treasures however, were two of the remaining computer consoles salvaged from the remains of the city. They had been discovered in a cache of school supplies from the University. I longed to fire mine up, as I had been an avid game fan before the attacks, but decided instead to complete my survey of the room. I strolled around the alcove on the right side of the room to find a small food preparation area that lead to a large walk in closet and bathroom. The bathroom was small but I eyed it happily enough because the children's barracks hadn't boasted much in the way of privacy. To my utter delight, I found that the building I was in happened to be one that was connected to the new hot water supplies. I spent a few minutes playing with the taps, alternating between hot and cold. That's how my new roommate, Alana, first found me. She was festooned in bags and looked at me as though I were nuts! "Hot water! We have hot water!" I shouted triumphantly and smiled at her. Her expression changed into one of happiness and longing. I stuck out one wet hand, "I'm Kayla by the way, your roommate." "I'm Alana." She shook my damp hand, "wow! We really do get hot water. I'm taking a shower as soon as I get unpacked." I watched as she proceeded to dump the contents of three bags onto her bed. "My style of unpacking!" I snickered. After that our friendship proceeded quickly. We talked about what we had been doing for the last few months and shared a few mutual tears over the families we'd lost. Alana was lucky. Although she had also lost her parents in the attacks, she had one older brother who survived. He had been picked up for the Academy two month prior and through careful dropping of hints had gotten his sister in as well. We had both heard rumors of that it was like: strict, incredibly hard, but the most rewarding job on the planet. We both eagerly awaited the next day when we would start the next class. Walking into class the next day Alana and I couldn't have been more of a contrast. She was tall, at least 5'10" and at only 16 was likely to get taller. I on the other hand was only 5'2" but had hopes that I'd keep getting taller. Alana was also much more mature than I. Voluptuous, my mother would have called her, and at 15 I was still able to get away with not wearing a bra. I sighed mentally, hoping one day I would be distinguished from my male classmates by more than my long hair. Ahh, my hair! My hair was a bit of an oddity too. Since most people had hard, labor intensive jobs, they tended to crop their hair short, even the women. I still remembered my mother, who wore her waist length hair down every day, because my father loved it that way. I remembered how he would hug her in greeting and stroke his hand down her back, fingers playing in her silky hair. I stubbornly refused to cut my hair, hoping that one day I too might find someone who took pleasure in my hair like that. Alana, after hearing me tell her about my mother, had recently decided to grow hers out as well, but it would take time. All our dreams of soaring through the clouds on metal wings had been crushed within five minutes of starting the first class. We were quickly informed that we had to first pass the academics, then basic flight training, then those who wished to fly the fighter craft would go to advanced and those not good enough would be shunted off to the cargo planes. Alana and I cowered in the back, hoping to not be seen and trying to get a good idea of who was in our class. I would love to say that neither of us stood out but that's far from true, we were the only two females in a class of 15. We were also the two youngest. Our classmates ranged in age from me, at 15, to Trey who was a sedate 23. Through the morning Alana and I tried to concentrate while ignoring the querying looks from our classmates. Really! It was like they'd never seen girls before! At the meal break we were finally given time to introduce ourselves as we headed to the mess hall as a group. Alana and I would have liked to have lagged in the back but the men in our class herded us forward, forming something of a protective ring around us. When we asked why they brushed us off. Despite that, the meal was fun and filling, something I wasn't used to. In the children's barracks there was always food, there just never seemed to be a lot. When I might normally have stopped eating my classmates urged me to eat more, stating that I looked more like a bean pole with hair. I stuck my tongue out at Cody, who had said it, but went back to the serving line and took seconds of everything. Cody followed me up, saying that he too, was still hungry. He smiled shyly at me and apologized for the joke. He seemed to be a sweet guy, only a year older than me and soft spoken. Back at the table we shared out stories, how we got there and what family, if any we had left. Most of them, like me, were the last in their family. Considering the staggering losses we took, it wasn't surprising. At the end of the meal we all walked back to our class room, Alana and I still being surrounded by our gaggle of classmates. Again we asked why they walked with us on the inside and they finally fessed up. Before Alana and I got there they were all briefed about us, that we were to be guarded as they would guard their own sisters. They told us that because of the brutal mentality of the Rhashi there were a disproportionate number of women left. The Rhashi had raped then killed any woman they found leaving the ratio of men to women almost 3 to 2. I was shocked at first but then thought more on it during the second half of classes, there had always been more boys than girls in my barracks and there were always more men lounging around the common areas than women. I guess I had just assumed that women were somewhere else to relax at the end of the day. At the end of the academics for the day the men were released and Alana and I were told to wait, the Commandant of Cadets would be in to see us shortly. I waved my fingers at Cody and the rest of the guys as Alana and I each had minor heart attacks trying to think of what we possibly could have done so wrong in our first day and were shaking when we stood as he entered. The Commandant was a tall, slender man with dark blonde hair with a handsome but serious face. He excused our instructor and closed the door as soon as the man was out. The man seemed to enjoy watching us cower in terror. I felt as if I were a horse being judge for show. His gazed skated over our faces, down the length of us and back up. It rested seemed to take in our very being. "Ladies, I know you have a lot of questions, but I ask that you hold them until I am done." Alana and I exchanged a glance then refocused on the Commandant. "Here at the Academy, we pride ourselves on producing excellent pilots, no matter what the craft. But as you may see most of those pilots are men. We don't get a lot of women in here, as your classmates have explained; there just aren't enough to go around." He sighed deeply, loss and regret visible on his face. I guessed that he must have lost his wife and made a mental note to ask someone later. "There have been discussions of late on the fate of this colony and how we will keep the population from dwindling." When Alana's eyebrows rose a bit in question he nodded. Alana shifted uncomfortably in her seat and I gave them a confused look as. "We will strive to make you the best pilots on this world, but understand that at some point your career may get cut short. "Until the Council makes any decisions regarding population growth, you will fall under my rule. You will obey all rules for cadets but must also follow these additional rules for females: If you are not in class, eating, studying or in flight you will remain in the female dorms. You will not go anywhere without another female and you are not to enter the male dorms unless escorted by an instructor. Am I clear?" "Crystal." Alana replied visibly annoyed. I looked from one to the other still confused. The Commandant saw my look and gave Alana an amused smile. "Alana, you being the more," he paused succinctly, "mature female in this class, I ask that you please explain to our young friend my full meaning this evening after dinner. You are excused." We stood as he left. Once he was gone I whirled and faced Alana, my face expectant. "You'll have to wait. I have someone to see. Wait for me in the dorm; I'll walk with you to dinner." "But, he said-" "Yeah, I know what he said, but I'll be quick. Promise!" She hurried off, leaving me confused still. Taking a quick peek down the hall to see if I was being watched I hurried out of the building to the male dorms. If Alana wouldn't tell me yet maybe I could weasel it out of one of the boys. I wandered down the halls, searching the name plates for Cody, whom I'd befriended during lunch. When I knocked on his door his eyes widened in horror when he saw me. "Girl, are you insane? You can't be here!" He grabbed my shoulder and hauled me in before anyone could see me lurking in the hallway. "What the hell's gotten into you?" "Calm down Cody! I'm trying to find out what the Commandant was talking about earlier..." Before I could finish he laughed, hand over mouth and eyed me. "Oh ho! So you go his 'be good and virtuous or else!' speech?" "Uhm, I guess. He didn't make much sense and asked Alana to explain it to me later. But she had to run off and told me she'd tell me after dinner, so I was hoping you could fill me in." He laughed again. "Yeah, I could, but that would rob her of the fun! Run along now youngin'! I don't wanna see what they'd do to you if you got busted in here!" he said ruefully as he kicked me out. Annoyed, I resolved to get it out of Alana as soon as possible. As soon as I stepped into our room I knew that wouldn't be soon. Alana was lying on her bed crying and from the redness in her eyes she'd been that way for a while. "What happened??" I demanded, wondering what could have happened to bring on the tears. "I had to end something I didn't want to. Lemme wash my face I'll tell you after dinner." The conversation had to be delayed until way after dinner because upon leaving the mess hall we were given our books and told we needed to read the first three Chapters by tomorrow's class. Back in our room I quickly breezed through then flopped, belly first onto my bed and looked at Alana. "So?" I dragged out the word expectantly. "Ok, you've waited long enough. First question, did your mother ever have 'The Talk' with you?" I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, I'm not that young!" "So, do you have any idea what the Commandant was talking about?" "Well, I'd expect that he doesn't want us sneaking off to the guys dorms for any make out sessions." I grinned and blushed. At 15 I had only barely begun to notice men as something more interesting than women. But life in the kid's barracks and working parties didn't leave much time for me to explore this intriguing notion. "Oh lord!" Alana rolled her eyes and flopped belly first onto her bed. "You do know what sex is? Right?" "Oh yeah ... well kinda. I mean, Mom explained the mechanics of it. You know, insert tab A into slot B." I blushed furiously and dropped my eyes to the floor, wanting to be anywhere but there. "Well, sex isn't just insert, remove, repeat. There are ... consequences. The main one being kids! Surely you realize that's where kids come from right?" If possible I turned even redder and mumbled some kind of affirmative. "Well, the Lord High and Mighty Commandant doesn't want any hanky panky going on, because if you get knocked up, they'll drop you from the school." I gasped. "So, that's why the strict rules. And that was reason for the water works; I had to tell my boyfriend that I wouldn't be able to see him anymore. As for the other stuff about the Counsel, I've got no idea." She paused, eyes unfocused. ------- Chapter 3 "It's going to be a long few years girly-girl." "It's going to be a long few years girly-girl." Alana told me. Truer words have never been spoken. The next two years went by at a grueling pace. The first year consisted of academics in the morning coupled with working parties in the afternoon to help maintain the functions of the small but growing city. The bond between Alana and I, as well as our other thirteen classmates grew deep until it formed the families we had lost. Alana and I became the sisters we had never known and I adopted Cody as the "big brother I never wanted". The three of us spent what little free time we had in each other's company. For a while, Alana entertained ideas that she and Cody might have come to an understanding but after a few furtive attempts, he admitted that he was gay. Alana gave up and Cody became the "big sister I never wanted." I thought he might be offended by that name, but instead he would just giggle when I called him that. Alana and I remained roommates as well as only two of the five females in training. The five of us because like sisters sheltering each other from the hurts of our young lives and the occasional over eager male classmate. While the boys acted like teen-aged boys, they respected us and treated us like family. As with all families fights occurred but they were swiftly resolved and life went on. Each of us knew were couldn't survive without the others. In the second year, we began to fly and the family only became closer. The time for rehearsing theories of flight and math for instructors was gone, something each of us cheered, but it was replaced by daily flights with even more strict, more demanding instructors. These were a different animal than the last group. With both our own life and the instructor's life on the line every time we flew, they demanded no less than perfection, a mark most missed on a daily basis. The only good part about graduating to actual flying training was that the amount of free time increased. Most of the men could be found spending their hard earn rest time either exercising or trying to chat up the girls in our age range. I spent my time either running the long and beautiful trails surrounding the camp with Alana or back in my room playing games on my beloved consol. I would become so engrossed in my games, competing against others in the camp, that it took me a few weeks to notice that sometimes when I played, Alana would slip out of the room, for hours on end. At first, I figured that she was just going off to study but when she started to come back later and later, looking more and more pleased with herself each time I finally asked her about it. She told me that she had started seeing someone and begged me not to tell anyone. I asked who her mystery man was but she refused to say, stating that if she were caught it would be dire consequences for both of them. Remembering the speech we'd been given the first day I just nodded and left her alone about it, after all, she seemed so happy! That night I mused about Alana's secret affair, wondering what it must be like to have someone. Of all of my classmates, those who had lovers or bondmates seemed most relaxed. I guessed that having love gave you the strength to deal with the pains and strains of life. Then again, it might just be the constant sex kept them in a perpetually blissful state. I nodded off that night hoping that one day I too might have someone to love, or at least to satisfy my baser needs. The prospects weren't bright; there just wasn't anyone I could see myself being with. My classmates were my family and I had a hard time thinking of them as anything else and I didn't really know anyone outside of school. Maybe, I thought sleepily, at the end of training I'd have the time to meet someone new. Then I sighed as I remembered that we would all start working camp jobs in the afternoons again at the end of the second year. The end of our second year heralded one of the largest parties the camp had seen. The Academy threw us a party celebrating the milestone and it happened to coincided with the anniversary of the official creation of the town. A day of rest of given to everyone and it was stated that the town would return to an old custom of having one day in seven as a rest day. People celebrated with us as we marked the end of training for some and a new phase for others. Not only did we get to celebrate the end of one phase of training, we got to find out the fate of the rest of our training. The party was where the Academy announce who would become fighter pilots and who would go to cargo. Due to the small number of fighter craft in relation to cargo planes, they were highly regarded and desired by most. Unlike me, Alana, hoped she would go to cargo. Alana was deeply in love, although she still wouldn't name her suitor, she wanted to be finished so she could start a life as a pilot and a wife. At 17, I liked the guys in my class but none of them seemed worth the effort to give up my dreams of fast jets and blue skies. Fate smiled on me once more as Alana and I each got our wish. She was to go cargo and I was to go fighters. We hugged each other and cried, knowing this was the end of an era. Soon after the announcement and much to the Commandant's dismay, she and her beloved, an instructor by the name of Cooper announced their intent to be wedded. Everyone cheered, even if it seemed like they were an unlikely pair. Despite the fact that Cooper wasn't much to look at, and was a pain to fly with, I knew how deeply Alana loved him and wished them the best. After the party, Cooper and I helped Alana move her few belongings from the room to his quarters. Tomorrow she would start her first flights shuffling back and forth between continents, taking back anything still useful, most notably the reserves of fuel that had been found at the end of our first year. I would begin fighter training, something that both scared me and make me extremely happy. It was hard for me to sleep that night. I missed the late night chatting with Alana over which of the guys in our class were cute, dating, not dating, or flirting with us. After two hours of tossing and turning I decided it was a lost cause and flipped on my consol to play a few hours' worth of games before showing up for training. Fighter training was hard work. Basic had been a joke compared to this. Instructors looked down on you as if you were dirt and tried at every opportunity to fail you out. Their reason was that if you couldn't take it from them, you'd never defeat an attacking Rhashi. There was some intelligence to that logic, but it still made training hard and some days downright painful. However, those of my class who had moved on soon found that mean came in varying levels. Some instructors were downright cordial in comparison to others. Some would yell at you while you got ready for the flight, trying to fluster you, but left you alone in the jet. Others seemed like they might be nice but once you go them off the ground they lit into you with no stopping. The most infamous, at least to me, was Decker who only stopped yelling long enough to stare you down. At 6'5" he towered over everyone and used his physical presence to add to the fear he managed to instill in his students. A master of his craft, he rarely, if ever, allowed mistakes, from both students as well as fellow instructors. If his height and substantial breadth weren't enough, there was always the "Decker Stare." The man had only two facial expressions: angry and annoyed. I was convinced the only joy he got in life was from terrorizing students. Students were expected to study and fly in the morning then go to other various duties in the afternoons. I didn't mind because it gave me a chance to see Alana while working bunker duty. Bunker duty meant sitting, armed with rifles, out in one of the perimeter posts, watching for possibly attacks by Rhashi or others like them. Men had to do it alone, but women were always paired. We were told it was to keep us out of trouble, Alana told me with a laugh it was too keep our virtues intact. Either way, we treasured our days there. We mostly spent the time giggling over Cooper and the other instructors, mostly the ones who ticked me off. Being married to an instructor, she knew everyone who I talked about and could generally sympathize with me. Most afternoons I'd list off what terrible wrongs I'd been yelled at for and Alana would respond with either "Yeah, he's an ass" or tell me that that instructor wasn't so bad outside of work. Occasionally, Alana would indelicately probe me for whom I was attracted to or whom I may have snuck off and "done the dirty with." Her words not mine. Since starting fighter training, I had the time and opportunity to see someone, but couldn't find anyone whom I connected with or was very attracted to. I knew other girls had had their boyfriends, but I just couldn't see my classmates as anything but my brothers. Six months into my third year Alana was 5 months pregnant and convinced that, I too, could find a nice instructor to shack up with. I told her it was unlikely and that I would probably die an old maid, to which she would inevitably tell me that she was fine with that, it meant she'd always have a baby sitter. Training continued and I finally began to feel like I might actually become a fighter pilot. I also started noticing the men of my class wanting to spend more time with me. Once done with my work for the day one or another of them would ask that I help him prepare for his flight the next day. Seeing nothing wrong with this, I would stay until Alana and I would have to make the 3-mile trek out to our bunker. I was still studying so was allowed the time with them. Plus, all I had to look forward to in my room was gaming on my consol. Fun, but not very fulfilling. As the weeks and flights counted down to mere days, Alana became pushier about finding me a male companion. She got pushy to the point where I finally snapped at her, telling her that I'd find one in good time, but that at 17 going on 18 and still in school, I didn't feel too hard pressed. "You may not have that long to wait you know." She retorted. I looked at her, angry that she would push me for what I perceived to be no reason and afraid that there might be a reason. "Why?" I asked warily. She shrugged which had a curious effect on her gravid belly. "No reason, just some rumors I heard the other day." "Rumors? You just happened to hear?" I laughed, "They didn't happen to come from the mouth of that stud of a hubby you have. Who, as it seems, might also be the Academy's liaison to the Counsel?" "Weeeeell," she drew the word out, "maybe. Yes. But I can't tell you! I'm sorry, please don't even let anyone know I might have hinted at what's coming, but I do recommend you find someone you like," she said in a rushed and pleading voice. "Fine. I'll see what I can do. But I just don't see my guys that way, despite what they may hope." I muttered. "Aha! They are starting to notice!" "Notice what?" "Girly-girl we have got to get you a mirror. They aren't the only ones who seemed to have missed the fact that you are scorching hot!" I looked confused. "Pu-lease. You're what, 5'10" now?" I nodded, I stood almost as tall as most of my classmates although much slimmer. "Hmm, plus you're lean, have a lovely face, and long hair that most women only dream about." I laughed, she teased me about my horse's mane often enough. I knew I was stared at, but always assumed it was my hair. But, I thought to myself, why would she make a fuss over that? In the years since I had told her of my father's adoration of my mother's hair she'd grown hers out long as well and now with all the prenatal vitamins she was scarfing down it shone like a blonde halo around her hair. "Stop teasing Alana, it's not nice. They see me as 'one of the guys' and have said so on many occasions. I'm just their little sister." It was true too. All of the men who'd gone on to fighter were 3 or 4 years older than I was and bonded already. Not all though, I thought sadly, there was still the problem of having more men than women. The disparity in the ratio had started to become more noticeable as time went by. Men had begun to treat women differently. Not better, not worse, just differently. Women and men who had once worked hip to curving hip to build the town now regarded each other as very separate equals. Women were being given less strenuous jobs than before. Alana and I speculated that it was a preservation tactic. The Counsel was being reminded that women were the only ones capable of bearing kids. Added on top of that was the very serious issue of consensual sex. Men looking for a little action were hard up to find it these days. The Counsel, by popular demand had lowered the age of consent from 18 to 16 and lowered the penalty for statutory rape from banishment to a month or two of confinement. At my pleading tone Alana just raised an eyebrow then whipped around at the sound of footsteps crunching nearby. We each reached for our guns and cautiously peered out the two bunker windows. I squeaked in shock to see Decker at my view hole, as always, looking annoyed. I almost dropped my gun in fright; the man was an absolute terror! "Alana, if you are going to be allowed to keep this cozy little job after the baby I strongly suggest you DO IT!" He roared at us. I fumbled and unlatched the door so he could enter, wondering why he was here. It was mid-shift and no one ever came out to our side of the camp. Decker, followed by Cooper, ducked through the door giving me his most jolting stare then turned to Alana. "You, however, won't be returning here anytime soon. Cooper here has asked the Counsel that you be excused from this post until after you've given birth to his son." He smirked, "he seems to think that a woman as pregnant as you shouldn't be hiking the 3 miles to get here while toting a 15 pound firearm." Alana sighed with relief at her bondmate. I gave her a hurt look, who was I going to work with now? "I'm sorry Kayla, but I kinda happy to go, it is starting to take a strain on me. Good luck!" She exchanged her riffle with Decker's pistol and began her walk back with Cooper. Shocked at their sudden departure, I stared open mouth after her. Realizing that I looked like a beached fish I snapped my mouth shut and steeled myself to turn and face Decker. I mean, this man really scares me. I stand eye to eye with most men, but I barely come to his shoulder. Hell, I barely come to his armpits. Not to mention the fact that he's twice as broad as I am and I get the impression that he could snap me like a twig if he wanted to. I'm pretty athletic, but this guy has me by at least 100 pounds. The thought suddenly occurred to me that this is probably the kind of situation the Commandant was trying to get us to avoid. That made me nervous. It occurred to me that in three years, I had never been alone with a man other than Cody. Blanching, I whipped around to face Decker and almost smacked my nose into his chest. My anger at Alana's sudden departure returning, I got up the courage to talk again. "Who's replacing her?" I managed to rush out. "Me." "What?" "Kayla, how many times do I have to ask you if you're dumb or just deaf? I said: Me." "But, uhm..." I fought to find words, "it's always two females on duty, only one male. If you're here, I don't really need to be here." I was probably grasping for straws, but I didn't really relish the idea of having to stand watch another two hours with him. This gig was tolerable because Alana and I got to gossip. With Decker, I didn't think I could make it. "Are you trying to abandon your post? Is this your way of telling me you're too lazy to finish school? Because, honestly, I'd love to let you go." Somehow he managed such a scathing reply without any change in his facial expression. It remained the same annoyed look as always. "No, it's just that ... well ... I uhm..." I started stuttering and mumbling trying to find words, "It's just that, well, you're kind of making me nervous." He laughed and his lips twitched in what may have been a quarter of a smile. "So, how is that different from any other day?" "Ahh, I've never, uhm that is..." I almost died from shock as he managed a half a smile. In the year I'd know him I'd never seen him even indicate that he was capable of emotions like mirth. "I've never been alone around a guy before." The half smile disappeared and the annoyed look came back. "I find that difficult to believe," he muttered turning back to face his window. I got the impression that he thought I was lying so I just left it. I turned to my window and left him to do as he wished. I could hear him turn to me again, his stare drilling into my back but refused to turn around. After a moment I heard him turn around and take up Alana's post. The two remaining hours dragged on in silence but finally our replacement showed up. Almost giddy with relief I signed the log over to him and almost missed the quizzical look he gave me when we saw who else occupied the shack. "Alana was relieved of duty until the baby comes. He's her replacement." I explained then realized that I still had to walk the three miles back to the female dorms with Decker. Trying valiantly to hide my sigh I clicked on my light and stepped out into the cool night air. It seemed to calm me a bit as I set off at a brisk pace for home. I didn't get very far when I was suddenly grabbed roughly from behind and spun around. For the second time that night my nose came within inches of Decker's chest. "What the hell do you think you're doing? How dumb are you?" He lit off a string of swear words that scorched even my ears. I stared up at him totally flummoxed by what he could be so angry about. "You think you can just go wandering around in the woods in the middle of the night by yourself?" He shook my shoulders. "Uh ... I guess." "Damn it, I thought you had more sense than that. Any horny retard in this camp could attack you! You should have waited for me!" Angry that he would think I'm still some dumb child warred with amusement at the implied remark that he thought I had even a small amount of sense. Finally, my anger won out and I snapped back. "Oh and I suppose you're better than the average horny retard and I have nothing to fear!" Score one for Kayla: even in the dim light from my flashlight I could see an almost guilty look cross his face. Unfortunately, it was gone so fast I couldn't call him on it. "No. I'm here to make sure that doesn't happen! Now stay with me." With one of his massive hands on my shoulder he steered me down the path, not letting go until we were nearly a mile from home. "Will you be replacing Alana from now on?" I found the courage to ask as my dorm came into view. "No, you'll be off duty too soon." "Really? Why?" Startled, but not too upset I thought of what I might do with some free time. "You'll find out tomorrow, until then your afternoons belong to you. I hope that I will find you using them to study or help your classmates. I swear I had better not hear about you sneaking off with some boy! You have only two days left, don't blow it." Coming from him that was high praise. As I unlocked the outer door of the dorm he turned back to me one last time. "I won't be you instructor any more. Don't disappoint me." Stunned I couldn't move as he walked away. This terrifying man was almost praising me. ------- Chapter 4 The next day was almost the same as usual for me. Although when my instructor was yelling at me for "horrible performance" I could tell he was almost smiling, knowing that I was one day away from graduation. As had become the usual, after my flight I was mobbed by classmates who wanted my help for the next day. Sighing inwardly because Alana had opened my eyes, I helped them but paid very close attention to who really needed help and who only seemed to want to gawk at me. It was an uncomfortable realization, but most of them were there for the latter. Annoyed I announced that I wanted to go home early. The only problem was: with Alana out of the bunker job there wasn't another female to walk with me. Dismayed I walked over to the guy on duty and asked if there were any other women around today. He just laughed. Crap. That meant I was walking alone. After the walk home with Decker and the change I had noticed in my classmates I was hesitant to have one of them come with me. Resigned to trying to sneak by to my dorm with our being noticed I tried to nonchalantly wander to the exit. Luck was with me though, as I was getting set to make a dash for it Alana came walking, or maybe more like waddling, up waving an orange piece of paper at me and looking worried. "Seen this yet?" She handed it to me with a flourish. "No, what is it?" I started skimming through it, then dropped the paper in shock as its meaning sunk in. "This? This is what you were hinting at? Oh my word, has the Counsel lost it?" I demanded, "not that it affects you I guess." "Yeah, this is what I was hinting at. The population isn't growing enough. I'm one of only 4 pregnancies in the last two years. So, all unbound females ages 16 to 30 will be impregnated. Did you read how they're gonna decide who the daddies will be?" I shook my head, I was barely absorbing the fact that I was going to have to have a kid! "If you have anyone in mind that you'd find acceptable then you can declare intentions to have him be the father, otherwise they're doing it as an auction!" She seemed excited, not really grasping what that meant for me. "So just talk to the guy you want and then go put him on the list." "Alana! There's no guy!" She looked stunned. "What? No. That's not funny," she shook her head at me and smiled, "just go talk to him." "No, I'm serious. There isn't a guy. There's never been a guy!" I looked at her meaningfully. "Oh. Dear." Suddenly becoming serious, she tugged at my hand. "Well, let's get back to my place, we'll talk there." She dragged me briskly to the building she and Cooper lived in. Their building had four units, each with three bedrooms and a sizable lounge plus a kitchen. The thought at the time of building had been for growing families, but so far the couples living there were just getting a lot of space. Alana called out for her mate as she crossed the threshold. He popped his head out of what was his "office". It wasn't really an office, just a room where he had chairs and a table to play games with "the boys" as Alana called them. His eyes bugged out when he saw me and he beckoned for Alana. Ignoring his odd behavior I dropped into the couch wondering how I was going to become a mother at 17 almost 18. Alana rejoined me shortly. "Seems he's having a bit of a business meeting or something. Never the less we can talk about the auction I guess." I gave her a look, hoping for some amplifying information, but she pressed on. "The plan is that all eligible females' names will be put up at auction. The men are all allotted an amount of "money" based on what their job is and how high they stand in it." She giggled, "That means all your beloved fighters are given top dollar." I glared at her. Now all her pushing me to find someone, to take a look at my classmates made so much sense, if only she'd have told me! If only what? I thought to myself, it still wouldn't have stopped the inevitable. I'd still be trying to figure out which of my "brothers" would be siring my baby. "What if I get auctioned off to someone I hate!" "Please, you don't hate anyone here!" I gave her a look. "Ok, so there are some instructors you don't get along with. But Cooper knows them all and they aren't like that out of training. They act like human beings I promise!" She chuckled, "Yes, even you-know-who! I've gotten to know him kind of well of late." Her voice trailed off and I got the impression that she wasn't telling me the whole story again. Too tired and distraught from this news I didn't push it. "Besides, most of the ground work will be done before you even go up. All the credit given to each guy is transferable. So once they chose who they'd like, they'll work it out amongst themselves to get enough credit for the mother they want. I expect most of the fighters will have enough for whomever they want." "Ha! Even your hubby?" "No, dunce, married men aren't eligible. They've just been asked to have lots and lots of sex with their mates." I blushed, Alana really didn't have a filter between her brain and mouth. She giggled at me again, "Please, not like it's that bad. Hopefully one go and he'll be out of your hair. I mean, it's not like this is the first time you've done this!" I gave her a terrified glance, "Oh my, you weren't kidding! You really haven't done this before!" She launched herself off the couch, a pretty impressive move for someone as pregnant as her. She spent a few moments pacing while I contemplated having sex for the first time with a stranger. Lost in thought I didn't notice her slip off to Cooper's officer until she reappeared a few minutes later. "Well hun, are you going to be ok? You look like you may need to be left with your thoughts," she held a hand out to help me up off the couch. I grudgingly accepted and we walked to my dorm both lost in thought. "Ok, I'm leaving you here be good. Think it over, maybe there is someone you wouldn't mind too much?" Her voice sounded hopefully but I wasn't. "Goodnight Alana." I said gruffly and walked outside still too distraught to think. How am I supposed to pick someone for this? I loved my classmates like brothers, but that's the problem, they're like brothers. I trudged up to my room and dropped on the bed. Weary from the day I was out almost instantly. Alana walked back to her building, mind mulling over the day. Still stunned that Kayla both didn't have a father in mind and the fact she was still a virgin bothered her. She'd hoped she's had more of a corrupting influence on the girl, but she guessed not. Sighing she opened her door to see Cooper still in his "business meeting". Peeking in the door she asked if either man wanted a refreshment before she went to bed. Cooper got up and kissed her cheek saying he'd get anything they needed. Alana smiled at him and nodded to their guest. "Working things out alright?" She got one of his typical grunts in answer. "Well, you may want to consider the prize. I think its worth a LOT more than you're considering. She's gonna go for a high price." Her guest nodded mutely, still staring at a small scrap of paper in front of him. Cooper patted his hand. "We'll get you what you need. I promise!" Alana turned and walked back towards the bedroom desperately hoping that there would be enough hot water left in the tanks to get a full bath. She also resolved to keep what she knew about Kayla a secret, at least for now. The next day started with me waking up in my coverall still to the blaring of my alarm. Glancing at my consol I realized I had only ten minutes to be down to the building for my graduation ride! Forgetting everything but the ride I scrambled to assemble my necessary equipment and run down to the building. I didn't even stop to think that I didn't have an escort. Running at top speed I had a nagging feeling that there was something I forgot. I managed to get in the building with 2 minutes to spare and took the time to let my racing heart calm. Dropping my bags in the student room I quickly noticed two things: 1) the orange flier Alana had shocked me with was posted in at least 3 different places and 2) everyone in the room had stopped talking and started staring at me the moment I walked in. Feeling the first twinges of paralyzing embarrassment I hustled to a preflight room to wait for my instructor. A few of my bolder classmates tried to follow me but I slammed the door in their faces not willing to risk an ounce of sanity before this flight. Fortunately I was saved from further embarrassment by my instructor showing up. Normally getting ready for a flight can take upwards of two hours but today all that my instructor asked was if I was ready. I muted nodded and he gestured for me to leader the way. I held my chin high and tried to ignore the stares as we walked to our aircraft. I felt dazed as we went through the preflight checks. Seeing faces peering out at me from the windows as we got ready almost threw off my game. Somehow I managed to pull off a credible flight but not without a stumble or two at the beginning. As we landed my instructor radioed to me that we had a welcoming committee. Apparently everyone in the building had decided to come out to see me complete my training. After parking our planes we did the long walk I'd always hoped to make. The 100 yards from the plane to the building after you last flight were sacred, the moment you should always cherish because you know you've made it. I savored the feeling, knowing I had finally become one of the elite. As I walked back a thought came to me that I hadn't had since the day I moved to this continent: a laughing pilot and soaring through the clouds. I remember him grilling me and asking me all kinds of questions as he tried hard to lift my depression for at least an hour or two. As I strode onwards to my graduation I vaguely recalled him telling me he'd do all in his power to get me into and though this program. I sighed and smiled, wondering what happened to him, where he was and who he was. After so long and so much in between it wasn't much more than a fading memory. The last 20 feet to the building my classmates and instructors rushed out to greet me and the moment became only a blur of smiles and hugs as I was congratulated for having made it. Somewhere along the way my cadet name tag was removed to be replaced with one that had my full name and a shiny pair of wings. Once the initial celebration was completed I still had to do the wrap up with the instructor, now my peer. We took the same room we had earlier and he kindly shut to door to keep out the curious. "The was some mighty fine flying you did. I was a little worried that your detractors might get to you but you managed to pull it off. I'm proud of you Kayla." It felt so odd to not be yelled at. Hell, it felt odd to be done. I just smiled and him and shook the proffered hand. As I got up to leave he halted me, "and if you haven't made a choice yet, I would happily sire your child." He smiled at my shocked expression. Blushing furiously I could only nod as he left. I only wanted to gather my things and retreat to the safety of my room but it was too hard to dismiss the other who wanted to party with me. At 3 weeks from being 18 I was the youngest ever to have finished this school, even before the invasion. That coupled with being one of the few females made me quite the commodity. With the orange fliers from the Counsel being posted everywhere everyone knew what would be coming and men I didn't even know were bold enough to ask me to allow them to sire my child. As soon as I could politely leave the festivities I ran for the comfort of my room. Once there I checked my terminal and found two notes, one from my new boss telling me I'd be expected to begin my flights tomorrow morning and the other from Alana telling me that anytime I wanted a place to stay away from the student dorms I was welcome. That got my mind going. Where would I stay now? I had earned the rights and privileges of being a fighter but had no real idea what those were. Deciding rather stay with Alana then be here alone I walked to her place. On the way there I reminisced about the old rules of needing an escort and how today it would almost have been welcome considering the looks I got. Feeling like an oversized beef steak being held to a waiting dog I knocked on Alana's door. It immediately flew open in my face and I was knocked down by a large bulk. Giving a small yelp as I got knocked to my butt I looked up into the face, nay kneecaps, of my least favorite instructor. Clearly shocked to see me there, he picked me up one handed and put me back on my feet. He gave one wordless nod and a smile to Alana and Cooper then stalked off. "Ooooh, is it my imagination or did he get bigger?" I tried to laugh it off while rubbing my sore backside. Alana smiled and opened the door wider to admit me as Cooper went back to his office. "So, I dunno if I'm homeless or not, but can I stay here for a bit?" My tone must have sounded like the pitiful plea it was because Alana hugged me right away. "Sure hun. Cooper, it's ok right?" He nodded once. That was a bit odd as Alana was usually queen of the house. No doubt it was something to do with his "business meeting" or whatever. "I don't really know where I go from here. I mean, I'm not a student anymore, I'd assume I'll go to some kind of fighter housing, I just don't know where that is. So I was hoping I could hide out here until the end of the week." "Until the auction you mean?" "Yeah." I stared at the ground unable to meet her searching look. "You'll be ok luv. There's a meeting tomorrow, for all the eligible girls. I'll take you to it." "Can't you just tell me? I know you know!" She glanced in the direction of Cooper's room. "Ok, ok. It just a run down of how it will go. By now all the men have received the information on how much credit they are allowed and are working out transfers and trades of credits. There are only 233 female eligible and there are over 450 men. So, the ones who are gay or don't wish to sire a child are in essence selling their credits. I imagine Cody that boytoy bondmate of his are delighted. It's legal you know," she said as I made a shocked face. I don't know why I'm shocked, nothing should phase me now. "So they all register their transfers up until the day before. At noon on Friday all transfers halt and the credits posted. Here's the part they aren't telling the ladies tomorrow. Each girl has been rated: by age, temperament, expected fertility, and of course, looks. They made that list available to the men so they could get an idea of how many credits each girl might be worth." "I feel like a..." I paused searching my memory for a word my mother once used to describe a slightly less demure woman mother knew. "slut? Is that it?" "No honey. A slut sleeps with everyone. I think you're looking for hooker, but you aren't that either." She brushed a stray strand of hear from my face and patted my cheek. "You were rated very high, if that's any comfort. In fact the only person rated higher than you is only so because she has the genetic potential to produce twins." Smiling she continued, "You won't be present for the bidding. You may not even meet your mate until a few days after. Once the bidding is complete and logged the winning man will get a gold ring, in your size, etched with his name. That's what he'll give to you so you know he's the official winner." "But Alana, what if he's horrible!" "Well, you need to speak now! Isn't there anyone who strikes your fancy?" I searched my mind but the only man who came to mind was the pilot. "Yes, but I don't even know who he is or if he's even still alive." Alana's eyes lit up. "Do tell!" "Before we started ... Hell before I even got here, there was a pilot." My eyes lost focus as I tried to bring up a picture in my mind of what he must have looked like. "He was young, tall ... I can't remember much else. I was on his plane coming here." I laughed, "He was so nice ... kinda hot too if I remember right. He jollied me along the whole flight, asking me questions, really interested in me." I laughed again, thinking of the promise, "he promised me he would do what he could to make me a pilot, said I was sharp, and would do well." I smiled at Alana who hung on every word, "He even wrote down my name. Too bad I didn't write down his." "Yes indeed," Cooper said, coming into the room, "now all I have to go on is: 'Wanted, hot pilot to be my children's father.' Doesn't that could like it'd be catchy on a flier?" He laughed at the face she made at him, "So you have no idea who he is?" "Nahh, a wisp of a dream now." Both nodded at me then exchanged a glance. Alana leaned over and patted my knee. "You may find him one day." "Does that sound to you, what it sounds like to me?" Alana asked her husband later as they lay in bed, each with a hand on her gravid belly, felling their son kicking like a pro. "Indeed it does and you will not tell her!" Alana's eyes flashed at her husband, "I mean it. She can't know!" "But it would give her hope!" "In good time, love. She'll get it soon enough. They'll be ok and hopefully this little one will have a friend to play soccer with soon enough." She stroked her swollen belly hoping to sooth the youngster. Then next day I had Cooper accompany me to the fighter building. Not my old student building but the one where all the full fighters went. "Be good, play nice with all the boys!" Cooper joking said as he left. I walked proudly through the doors and into my new life. The first half of my day was taken up by welcoming meetings from various departments culminating with my meeting the commander. He was a small, wiry man with short, bristly black hair. He introduced himself with a firm handshake and we sat to talk about my new career. "First and foremost, welcome. I'm glad to have you. All of us watch closely who comes into the programs and we've been rooting for you since day one. Now, I know you were concerned about your housing situation. I will, in time be giving you an apartment in the fighter building, but for now you are not yet a legal adult and there is also the pending outcome of the auction." He shifted uncomfortably, "Unless, that is you have declare intentions with someone?" He saw my dismayed look and pressed on. "In that case you housing will be dependant on that outcome. You may wish to stay with the father until the baby's birth. Never the less, I want you to stay at the cadet housing until then. I will expect you to start flying the routine patrols tomorrow, but you'll still be needed in the bunker in the afternoons. I will also hope I can keep you flying until you feel your pregnancy is too much." I gave him a worried look and he smiled gently at me, "Never fear, my daughter is you age and also eligible, if you need to talk, I can probably give you pointers." I shook my head, "Well then I must go, I have one more I'm welcoming today. One of the instructors has asked to come back to us and we're excited to have him back." We shook hands again and he ushered me out. For the second time in as many days I ran into Decker, although this time I stayed on my feet. "Twice now? You need to open your eyes a little more don't you think?" He said, smiling down at me. I simple goggled at him and then walked out of the room. Half way through the door I stopped and turned around. "You're the other new flier?" "Yes, as of two days ago. Like I said, I'm not longer your instructor." He smiled at me again and I thought I would faint. Twice in a day? I didn't think the man capable. I wondered if his face might crack! I walked to the ready room and looked for the bunker roster I'd been told was there. Looking for my name I found it on tomorrows schedule next to Amanda. That was good. It meant I was paired with another woman. Hooray for gossip time! Hopefully it would allow for me to become acquainted with my new "family" fast. ------- Chapter 5 The week flew by as I tried to establish a routine. Get up, go fly, eat lunch with Cody or Alana, go to the bunkers with Amanda, go back to Alana and Cooper's. Repeat. I'd taken to staying there as the men who were eligible tended to camp outside the door to my dorm, literally! Alana and Cooper were kind, feeding me and letting me sleep in Alana's office but otherwise leaving me be. The only other person I felt comfortable around was Cody, as he as one of the few men who wasn't pursuing me. However, even his company began to grate as he became just a little too happy about being able to sell his credits off for the best price. Alana tried to cheer me up by telling me about her first time, but before she could get too far into her story I pinned her with a hard look and asked her to knock it off. I just couldn't think about it, it was too much. Friday came and the final credits were tallied. I glanced at them, trying to see if I recognized any of the names. I saw a few I thought might be in my squadron but before I could get more than a glimpse Alana dragged me off to her home telling me not to fret, it would work out. All week I had tried to recall the name or even the face of the man who'd flown me here but to no avail. Finally calling it hopeless I had given over to watching as one name after the other dropped off the available list as girls declared men they would allow to sire their child. What had once been 233 names had dwindled to only 145. Hopefully with fewer names the auction would go by faster. Nerves began to get to me that afternoon while on bunker duty and I told Amanda I must have been going nutty because more than once I could have sworn there was someone out there watching us. We felt secure in the knowledge that nothing had so much as pinged the refurbished DEWDs the had been placed beyond the planets heliopause a few months after we had recovered from the attack. Amanda and I both scanned the horizons and listened to the very edges of our hearing but nothing showed itself. Short of shooting into the woods there wasn't much I could do. When the night man arrived Amanda and I bolted out of there like a shot. Amanda was also on the list of eligibles and not too happy either. "So you have no one in mind?" I asked her as we rounded the last bend before the city came into view. "No. My most recent relationship didn't end well and I hadn't the motivation to look for anyone." She sighed miserably, "the only person I would have considered was my best friend in lower school, but he was killed." I glanced sidelong at her and could see the pain and lost love written on her face, even years after the tragedy. We finished the trek home in silence, each lost deep in thought. I wondered who would bother with me? How would I react when I found out? I guessed that that would depend on who won me. Won me, what an odd way to put it! As I started up the steps to Alana's I considered the fact that one man really was the same as another in this case. Sighing, I knocked on Alana's door and was promptly let in. Sleep came so easily that night that I asked Alana about it when I woke and she admitted to slipping me a sleepy pill in my drink, knowing I wouldn't sleep otherwise. After breakfast she pulled me into her room and ordered me into her bath. I stared at her blankly until she pushed me into the tub then demanded I give her my now soaked clothes. Incensed, I pulled them off and did as told then washed up in the warm water. I managed a grin thinking of finally being able to have my own apartment in the fighter building once this was all over. I could really get used to having a full sized tub instead of the small stand up shower I had now. Laying in a bath, full of hot water, letting it caress you as it flowed all around you just wasn't the same as showering. I lay back in the water taking deep breaths of the sweet smelling steam that rose off the water. Alana came back after hanging my clothes and started handing me various bottles and lotions to use as I bathed. Her explanation was that it was possible my suitor would come tonight for completion of the auction and that I should look my best. Smile gone, I sunk low in the tub only moving when she directed me to. Once washed and dried Alana began to work on my hair, brushing the waist length mass so it fell around me in chocolate ripples. Then she sprayed me with a bit of sent and handed back my now dry clothes. Once dressed and decent again she led me back to my room in the student dorms. On the walk there I noticed that there wasn't a man in sight, they must all be at the auction. "Why can't I stay at your place?" I asked, hoping to hide just a little bit longer. "Because you listed place of residence is here, if he comes, this is where he'll go. Now, Cooper said they're almost done and you're up soon, so sit tight and we'll hope for the best." She gave me a huge smile and a hug, "I'm going to see how you do, I'll probably beat you suitor here, so just hang out." With that she left. I felt like I was a leaf on a river, drifting without direction and only able to go where the current lead me. I had no control, no options, and felt hopeless. I hadn't felt this scared or upset in three years and tears threatened but I couldn't let all of Alana's hard work on my make up go to ruin. So instead I took a deep breath and walked back up to my room. As I sat down on my bed I tried to figure out what I could do to pass the time. I tried reading a book but couldn't focus so I opted for gaming on my consol instead. That worked so well that I didn't hear my door open a few hours later, just the creak of my bed. Alana was the only person I who knew me well enough to just come in and sit down so I didn't bother turning around to greet her. "Just a sec Alana, I'm almost done with this level then you can tell me what poor sap shelled out for my sad carcass." I snorted, too involved to bother with being mad or upset. "Poor sap?" A deep male voice replied. Whipping around I saw Decker sitting on my bed. I stared at him trying to figure out what he was doing on my bed and where Alana was. What are you doing here, sir?" I could have kicked myself for addressing him so formally, but after a year under his instruction, it was a hard habit to break. Ahh, I thought to myself, enter the annoyed Decker look. That was almost a relief. If Decker was annoyed with me I knew how to handle myself. Decker terrorizing me was something I was used to and didn't scare me nearly as much as this supposed suitor. "I'm sorry, you'll have to leave. I ... uhh..." yup, familiar territory indeed, my stutter came back in full force. " ... I'm expecting someone." Decker eyed me carefully, noting the freshly washed hair. "I can see that. Who are you expecting by the way?" Ah yes, and the Decker stare. The one you get when he's asked you a question and the answer had better be what he wants to here and now! "I, uhh ... don't really know. Alana I guess. Other than that..." I couldn't finish, I just sighed deeply and turned back to my game. Sure, it was rude, but I didn't know what else to do or say. "Alana? Not by chance a suitor, come to sweep you off your feet?" His voice dripped with sarcasm and for the second time today I felt tears start to sting my eyes. I slumped in my seat and could feel hot tears rolling down my face onto my arms. On screen my character had died. It was almost symbolic. Upon completing my dream I was being forced into motherhood which had the potential to take all my hard work away so I could raise the screaming child of someone I had yet to meet. Sniffing quietly, I answered him without turning around, hoping he wouldn't realize I was crying. "Yes, I suppose so. Now please, I'd like to be alone right now." So much for self control, the last word came out as a sob. Frustrated as well as depressed I launched myself from my chair and headed to my small ensuite bathroom but was stopped by his big hang wrapping around my wrist. With a tug he pulled me to him and even though he was seated, I was still eye level with him. With his other hand Decker reached up and wiped away my tears. "I guess I'm not what you were expecting then." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a gold ring. Recognizing it from Alana's description I knew this meant only one thing. Decker was the one who'd placed the winning bid on me. I stared numbly as he placed the ring on a finger of the hand he was holding. All I could do was stare at it dumbly and sniffle. It glimmered in the light of my room and I could see the "Decker" clearly etched into it. He let go of me and I walked back to the bathroom and closed the door. Well, I thought philosophically, I guess that there isn't much worse. I might as well make the best of it. I splashed cold water on my face and patter it dry hoping I could face this without too many tears. Somewhat pulled together I walked back out to the room and faced him. "Well, uhm..." I didn't even know where to start. He stood and pulled me to him again. With my head to his chest I could hear his voice rumble up from deep in his chest. "I hope that you know this may not be a onetime thing. I have the right to sire your first child." I nodded, unable to say anything more. He put one finger under my chin and tilted my face to his. Before I could think or react I was being kissed. Lightly at first, no more than a brushing of his lips against mine but it deepened as he soft parted my lips with his tongue, delicately probing my mouth. He broke off and moved the kiss to my cheek, then my neck. He nipped it lightly causing me to gasp and grab his shirt. It sent a feeling through me that raced down my spine and lodged itself warmly in my belly. Involuntarily, my hands grasped the front of his shirt. He continued to nip and lick his way to my earlobe and all I could do was cling to him feeling my face burning. My mind was racing. Who was this man really? He terrorized my life for year and now this? And my dear god, what was he doing? I suddenly regretted never having found anyone. It was dawning on me quickly that my drive to complete school might have robbed me of some of the finer things in life. Still nibbling gently as my ear lobe I felt him tug at the base of my shirt then pull it off completely. My blush intensified and covered not just my cheeks now, but to my chest which was now shockingly exposed. I jerked away trying to cover myself with my arms. "She plays coy, that's cute." He smiled and reached out to me again. But the effect of his kisses had been burned away but the sudden jolt of adrenaline I'd gotten. I backed away from him, eyeing him the way a mouse eyes a cat ready to pounce. My mind raced as my fight or flight response kicked into high gear. I tried frantically to think of where I could go but came up short about the time I backed into the wall. "Calm down, I'll stop biting you." He sounded less amused and the annoyed look started to come back, that I could handle. "Could I have that back please?" I said pointing at my shirt. He just laughed and tossed it on the bed as he stepped in closer. He put one hand on either shoulder and drew me in close. "You really are too cute, but stop. I promise I have some skill, you won't regret this. I dare say you may not even mind a repeat or two to be sure you have my child." He walked me to the bed pushing me ahead of him. At the edge of the bed he gently brushed aside my hair with one hand, fingers toying with curls, and leaned in to kiss my neck again. He nipped gently where the long column of my neck met my shoulder causing me to gasp again. I never knew my neck was that sensitive! He chuckled and slid both hands down my bare back. Surely he's got to feel me trembling and know there's something not quite right here! I thought. But no luck, he assumed I was only trembling with desired. He then pushed me onto the bed and sat down beside me continuing his gentle kissing moving to my collar bone then the tops of my breast. He gently drew aside my arms and worked down to kiss my nipple. Gasping audibly as his mouth reached it goal I writhed beneath him. The thought that this might be a good thing worked it way into my mind again. He swirled his tongue around my areola causing my nipple to pucker. I could feel goose bumps on my skin as his breath blew across nipple. He now lay beside me, one arm holding him up the other softly caressing my body, working from neck to breast to navel then to the band of my pants. I stiffened as I realized where he was going. He paused but only briefly as he undid the buttons and began to tug at my pants. I stared at him as he looked at my expectantly. Finally sighing he shifted, sat up, and with a whoosh removed my pants in one tug. I was now clad in nothing save a pair of lacy red panties Alana had scrounged up for me. "Nice," he said, eyeing them appreciatively and bent in to kiss me. My heart was pounding in my chest and how he didn't hear it I have no idea. I was blushing scarlet from my hair line to my breasts still and would have died of embarrassment had it not been for his continual kissing and deft caresses. Caresses which had now made it to the lace band of my panties and were slipping inside. I gasped for the millionth time as his warm questing fingers found what that sought. He dipped lightly into my slit then dragged his finger back up causing me to shudder and cry out. "You are a real treat aren't you?" He went back to nibbling my ear and I began to protest. "Ok, ahhh, stop!" Or at least that's what I tried to get out but I don't think I was that coherent. "What?" He must have heard me, but he dipped his fingers in again only teasing at the edges of my lips. "Stop. Wait. I'm not ... I mean I haven't..." He looked at me in disbelief, not really believing what I was trying to get out. Then his fingers dipped a little deeper and stopped, suddenly encountering my hymen. I think the world itself may have held its breath at that moment. I closed my eyes and dropped my head back expecting the worst. Alana had mentioned pain or something like that but she didn't mention humiliation. Cheeks still burning I couldn't open my eyes. I felt his fingers pull back. "I, uh..." he stammered. I guess my stutter was contagious some errant part of my brain had the gall to think. "I heard rumors. I, ahh, I didn't think it could possibly be true." I could feel him staring at me and I could feel tears starting in the corner of my eyes. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I never ... I just ... school and the escorting ... and dorms ... I just..." my voice trailed off in sob. I felt him turn away from me then and stand up. "This isn't what I expected. I'm ... sorry." I heard my door open, then close. Sitting up I realized that he'd left. I collapsed back on my bed, all my emotions from the week finally overwhelming me as I lay there sobbing. ------- Chapter 6 "How could you not tell me that! You knew and you didn't tell me!" Decker pointed at Alana, who was currently hiding from him behind Cooper. "I didn't think I would make a difference!" She yelled back. They'd been at it for 15 minutes. He'd come directly there from Kayla's. Cooper had answered the knock at his door to find Decker looking enraged and demanding to see his wife. He then gave a terse description of what had happened to Alana who sighed and admitted to knowing Kayla was a virgin as Cooper listened to the exchange in shocked silence. "Now what?! I've probably blown it. She's scared of me enough to begin with for no reason and now I doubt she'll ever leave that room!" He glared at Alana. "No reason? You are a dumb, Decker! You know full well that you terrorize your students. She's no different from the rest of them, despite what you want to think." "Well you damn sure could have told me before I went in there thinking she'd understand what I was doing!" "I'm sorry, ok! It was her secret to keep. I didn't think I had any right to interfere..." "You interfere with everything else, why not this too..." Decker yelled. " ... I didn't even believe her when she first told me. I figured there had to have been someone." Decker crossed his arms and heaved a big sigh, "Yeah, me too. God, I can't believe this. I mean, I just assumed she was like the rest of them." "Like the rest of us? What are you trying to imply you jackass?" Alana all but screamed. "That's enough!" Cooper finally broke his silence and stepped between the two of them. "Either both of you can take this outside and just have a knock down drag out or you can find a way to fix this. Alana, I love you, you are my world, but you're an idiot. Decker, man, you're my friend, but you're a jackass. Alana, you need to go calm Kayla down." He kissed the top of her head then turned her towards the door and gave her a swat on the butt. "Decker, you and I need to talk about how we're going to unfuck this mess." After seeing his wife to the door he grabbed a bottle of homebrew and poured two glasses. "Ok, let's start from the top..." My sobs where interrupted by a tentative tap on my door and Alana calling my name. I grabbed my shirt and donned it as I walked to the door. "Hey." I said and sniffled. She gave me one searching look and I burst back into tears. "Why him? Why did it have to be him?" I wailed. "I might have been ok with anyone else. Who knows, it might have been fun! But him?" She led me to the bed and sat with me while I cried myself out. She stroked my head and offered tissues as I let it all go. I told her everything that happened and she nodded with sympathy at Decker's mangled attempt at seducing me. "He's not that bad honey! You could have done far worse, trust me." I looked inquiringly at her, "Cooper and I ... well, we were kind of rooting for him. He's a good man, although you haven't seen that side of him yet and I think he may care for you, not just want your child." She smiled at me, "Coop's been helping him trade for the credits he needed to get you. You were the second highest bid paid..." "You!" I jump up, shouting. I pointed a finger at her. "You were helping him! Get out of here!" When she looked at me blankly I pointed to the door, "Get. Out!" Fury that she had a hand in this made me shake. "Calm down! This is not a bad thing!" "Out!" I shrieked and she finally got up and started walking out. She turned once as if to say something but the absolute fury in my face stopped her. Once she left I threw the lock and put the chain on my door. Furious that she could have been part of this humiliating experience I fumed. My mind churned trying to find options on how to get out of this. I considered just running away, taking off into the woods for a week and hoping that no one would look for me but I knew that would probably only make Decker pissed and the situation worse. I paced as I tried to think of better options. Hours later, exhausted and without any good ideas I fell into a deep sleep, still dressed on top of my bed. "Well, you're right, this is bad. She's angry, scared and humiliated." Alana told the men when she got back. "She just doesn't know the real you! She doesn't know anything about you. She only knows you as an authority figure, not what you're really like." She smiled at Decker, "That somewhere under all those muscles and that scowl there's a nice guy." "So, what now? How do I get her to know me?" He snorted, "It's not exactly like I can take her out on a date." "Hell, the poor girl probably doesn't even know what a date is. She too young to have dated before." Alana thought for a second. "Ah, that's it. She's too young. She can't live in the student dorms forever and she's still technically too young to have her own place for another couple of weeks. Why don't you see if you can get her moved into your place? I doubt your commander will see anything wrong with that." She laughed, "Even for an uptight fighter jock, he's not that bad." They agreed and Decker decided to work on it in the morning. "By the by, any words on how the others seem to be taking it?" Decker asked as he gathered his coat to leave. "Not bad at all," Cooper smiled at him. "Most of them had ... well ... sampled the goods enough to be fine with most of the men here. I think there were more up there for the fun of it than were really completely unattached." "Well, I guess that's good that I'm the only real bastard in this situation." Decker gave a weak smile and walked out into the night. It was easier for him to sell their scheme to his commander than he'd originally thought. Decker asked the commander for permission to have Kayla move into his apartment as they grabbed coffee the next morning, citing his reasons why. "Surely you can't be that bad in bed mate!" Colonel Lewis told him, thinking it was a joke. He leaned in conspiratorially, "How was she, really? She seems like she'd be a fire cracker!" Decker pinned him with a hard stare. "I'm being completely honest here, sir." The man looked nonplussed. Just then Kayla passed the break room on her way to get ready for her flight. "Want proof? Observe." He grabbed the room's small bottle of cream and placed in on the counter next to him. "She takes her coffee with two sugars and cream but I can almost bet you money that she won't come to get the cream if it means getting within arm's length of me." The Colonel nodded and moments later Kayla entered. She nodded to her boss and gave Decker on look of wide eyed horror. Weaving her way through the room, taking the path that got her as far from him as she could, she got her mug, quickly pouring her coffee with shaking hands. She added two scoops of sugar then glanced around for the cream. Spotting it next to Decker, who was trying to ignore her, she scurried out without it still keeping herself as far from him as physically possible. When she was out of ear shot, the commander let out a huge sigh and looked at Decker. "You've messed it up bad Decker, I believe you now! You have my permission. I'll have the gents in admin get the paper work done. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm taking her off her flight today. She's in no shape to fly." ------- Chapter 7 I spent my morning fuming. Last night's humiliation was still fresh in my mind as I tried to focus on my flight this morning. I was on the western patrol which I always looked forward to. It took you from the plateau the city was on into hilly country for miles. I had found a small river winding through the hills on my route last week and was looking forward to dropping deep into the hills and masking the river as I headed out. There was nothing like zooming only a few hundred feet off the ground to make you feel better! When I got to the squadron I started to gather my things for the flight while trying to ignore the glances my coworkers where throwing me. Ignoring their embarrassing looks was easy when I was buried under all my flight gear. Coveralls, notebook, charts, stopwatch for when the ship's clock failed, sunglasses, and user's manuals for when some onboard do-hickey failed to do its job again got lined up along the wall to our step desk. Before I left to walk out to my plane I went to the coffee room for my morning caffeine jolt. However, when I got there Mr. I'm-going-to-father-your-babies Decker was in there with Colonel Lewis. I tried to keep my composure by nodding to the commander and ignoring Decker, but I know my hands were shaking as I poured my cup. I added my sugar and went to grab the cream, but it was out of its usual spot, as always, left somewhere else by the last flier to grab his jolt. Searching I saw that it was right next to Decker and made the decision that I could drink the brew without cream today. There wasn't a force in the universe that would make me get within an arm's length of him. As if coffee without creamer wasn't enough just before I went to my jet the commander stopped me, saying that I had been pulled due to my delicate mental state. He gave me the day off and dismissed me. Furious, I staggered back to my locker with all my gear. I checked out with the guy at the duty desk telling him only that I wasn't flying and would be in my room if needed. In anger, I ran the whole way back. Once there I tried playing a consol game to calm down but couldn't seem to sit still. Without another outlet for my anger I chose to go for a nice long run. It had helped a little on the way out, so why not? As it was only just starting into the fall season I knew I would have beautiful and cool weather all day. I began by running out towards my bunker then looped west towards the airport. My mind began to relax and I started to take in my surroundings. In the years we had been at the second city the community hadn't pushed too far into nature. The city itself was barely 25 miles square and was centralized around the Counsel's building. Once you got outside of the borders, it was nothing but wild woods, untouched by humanity as far as you could see. I smiled to myself as I took in the beauty of the surrounding woods, taking in deep breaths of the pine scented air. I pushed my stride faster, letting the beauty of the day wash over me. An hour after starting out I decided I'd had enough and turned towards home. Fortunately for my aching legs, I'd been vaguely skirting the outer edges of the city and didn't have far to go back home. Once home I closed my door then threw the lock and chain, a habit I was more conscientious about than ever now. As I stood in my small shower I had tantalizing fantasies of Alana's huge tub and hoped I would get one of my own soon. Donning an over large shirt I'd "permanently borrowed" from Cody and pajama pants I decided that I was calm enough to play some games. I was still glued to my consol four hours later when I heard a knock at my door. Hitting pause, I hopped up and opened the door a crack, leaving the chain on. I was glad I had when I saw Decker on the other side of my door. Without hesitation I slammed the door shut. Leaning against it I could feel my heart hammering in my chest. A gentle rapping came through again. "Go away." I murmured. The knocking grew more insistent. I gave a glance at my window, wondering if I could slip out. Dumbass, find some fortitude and face this ass ... with the chain still on, of course. I eased the door open a crack. "What?" I didn't feel like even trying to be nice and diamonds couldn't have cut the ice that hung of that cold word. "May I come in?" "No." I started to close the door but he wedged one of his clodhoppers in there before I could. "I need to talk to you." "I have nothing to stay to you. Please leave." He stared at me, sending shivers down my spine as I remembered both the trail of kisses that had scorched my body as well as the humiliation that had followed. Seconds dragged on before he spoke again. "Let me in, I don't really care to break down your door." I threw a disgusted look and pushed on the door, trying to close it. "You are bound to me now. I know you know that. We need to work this out." He continued to glare at me. "Anything you have to say you can say through two inches of wood." I said and with a sharp kick knocked his foot out of the way, slamming the door once more. Heaving a sigh, I rest my forehead on the door. "I'm sorry." I waited a second not believing what I had hear. I'm the year I'd known him, I'd never heard Decker say "please", "thank you", or "sorry". "Please, Kayla. Open the door. I'm really sorry." I wanted to believe that he meant it, but the words sounded so foreign coming from him. I cracked the door open again. "I told you, I have nothing to say to you. Now leave!" Rather than obliging me he just wedged his foot in the door again before I could close it. I tried kicking him again but he'd wised up and put all his weight on that foot. Giving up on trying to close to door I simply walked away. He would leave when he realized I wasn't letting him in. I sat back down at my computer, angry that he was still there. "Damn it Kayla, I just want to apologize. You don't know me that well, I know that, but give me a chance!" I ignored him, putting my headset back on and staring at my screen. In retrospect, that was probably a bad idea. If I'd had seen the look on his face I would have seen the impending explosion. As it was, I didn't realize the magnitude of his anger until I heard my door slam open. Decker had rammed his shoulder into it with such force that the flimsy chain had snapped. I jumped out of my chair, startled, and saw him standing in the doorway furious. I stood there in shock as he strode over to me and grabbed my shoulders. "You and I are bound now." He said shaking me, "You need to get to know me so that you can see I'm not the monster you think I am." I only stared up at him in horror. Here he was trying to convince me he wasn't a monster after breaking down my fucking door! He let me go and I started to back away from him trying to get out of grabbing range. "You're not a monster? You broke down my door!" I pointed at it. "You terrified me and humiliated me last night and I don't want to get to know you! Now get out of my room." I shouted back to him, trying to throw off his grip. He took a step towards me. "It's not your room anymore," he said quietly, trying a different tactic, "As of today, you are no longer a resident of this building. The commander has reassigned your living quarters to my apartment." I started at him, "Gather you things so we can go." I just stood there. "Fine, then I'll grab some essentials for you, but we are going!" I continued to stare at him as he grabbed a bag of mine from off the desk and began stuffing clothes, flight suits, and toiletries into it. "You're joking, right?" He glanced at me and shook his head. "You can't have your own place yet and you can't live here anymore, so the commander decided that it would be in your best interest to reside with me." He paused, "look, you turn 18 in a few weeks any way, if I'm really that terrible then you can move out then." He finished stuffing my things into the bag and slung it over his shoulder. He took my hand in his and tugged at me, pulling me out the door. Still stunned I took one last glance at my room then pulled away. He looked as if he would have chased me down until I told him I wanted my consol. I spun on my heel and quickly retrieved it. I shut the door behind me and he reclaimed my hand. At first I thought he just wanted to be sure I didn't run off, but he began to rub his thumb against the back of my hand, almost reassuring me. The whole way to his place I thought of ways to bolt. Who was I kidding though? Where would I go? Into the woods? With no food, no lighter or even a knife I'd be back out there in a few days. Besides, I thought as I walked, once he'd calmed down he wasn't nearly as terrifying. Only mildly scary. And maybe a little hot. I stumbled briefly and Decker's hand steadied me. A little hot? Was I insane? Ok, so he's taller than me, which was a plus. His eyes, when they weren't glaring at me were a pleasant shade of warm brown, hazel really. He wasn't too hard on the eyes and had an athletic build. Broad shoulders and a massive chest tapered into a narrow waist and strong legs. All together a nice body, but what use was a nice body if I was terrified of the man? While I wrestled with the idea that I could consider Decker physically attractive we arrived. His apartment was on the edges of town close to the airport. I was shocked by how big it was. It was larger than Alana and Cooper's place by half again. Just the living room was bigger than my entire student room. Decker set my bag next to his sofa and turned to me. "Well, I'll give you the grand tour. This is the living room. That's the kitchen," he pointed to it. "There are three bedrooms and two bathrooms and both have hot water," he smiled at my gasp of surprise. Even now, hot water was still a precious commodity. "You can leave you stuff here or take it to the bedroom. Either way, I want you to feel comfortable here." He walked down the hall, flipping on the lights as he went. I picked up my bag a followed him. As I passed the other two rooms I snuck glances in each. One was obviously his office and was littered with books and papers that almost buried a small computer console. The other room was empty. The third room was obviously his bed room and was dominated by a huge bed. I had gotten used to the size of my bed in the dorms after living in the children's barracks but felt the same way I had the first time I saw that bed. His room was a mess too with clothes and books laid scattered on every surface. "Uhm, I didn't get a chance to clean up, sorry. But this is the bedroom, there's a closet there," he pointed "and the bathroom is here." He strode in, flipping on more lights. I followed him and gasped when I saw he had both a shower and a tub. The tub was huge! You could easily fit three people in it. I smiled thinking of taking long hot baths in there. Then remembered that I would be entitled to my own place soon enough. "So, where do I sleep?" I asked when we walked back out. "Here." "Uhm, but you sleep there." "Yes." I could feel myself blushing again. There was just no way out of this! Sensing my discomfort he drew me towards him, wrapping his arms around me. Stiffening, I looked up at him and he smiled down at me. "I'm no so bad. I promise to keep my hands to myself until you're ready." I sighed with relief and he let me go. "So, for now, you have free roam of my place, do what you wish." At a loss for anything else I decided on playing with my computer. Being absorbed in my game seemed like a good enough excuse for ignoring him and contemplating my new living arrangement. ------- Chapter 8 That evening, while I sat curled up on his comfy couch I started to hear bangs and clangs coming from the kitchen. Coming out of my game induced trance I wandered in there to find Decker cooking. Looking at him I laughed at how odd he looked, slaving away over a stove. Here was this huge behemoth of a man fretting over his food. I was used to just going to the student mess hall or on rare occasions getting dinner from Alana. I didn't even really know what others did for food. Decker turned from his task and smiled at me. "Can you grab that whisk for me?" I stared at him mutely. I had no idea what a whisk was or where to find one. "Uhm? I would if knew what it was. I'm not much of a cook." I stayed at the divide between the kitchen and living room. "Figures. You don't really have a kitchen. I'll teach you if you'd like." He walked towards me and I stiffened unconsciously but he reached for a small wire object next to me. Mad that I would still react to him like that I stalked out and went back to my computer. A few minutes later he poked his head out and stated that dinner was ready. I walked to the table to find bread, some form of cooked poultry and vegetables laid out. I went to grab a chair but he beat me to it. He settled me then took his own seat. Dinner went by pleasantly as we ate and discussed adjusting to a new squadron. Decker told me that he'd been at the training squadron since it opened and had only recently asked to be transferred. "Ahh, just think of how many student will get through and never have the pleasure of flying with you." I said and smirked. "You really are an ass to fly with, you do know that right?" "Yes. And I have my reasons." He bit into an over large hung of bread chewing it thoughtfully. I thought back to all the flights I'd had with him and what a terror he was. And now I'm sitting here enjoying a civil dinner that he cooked, I mused. My life had gone from hectic to weird. "So what in the world makes you such an ass? Depressing childhood? Oooh, are you one of those types who just gets off on it?" I snickered and took another bite of bread. "Well, there is a certain amount of satisfaction in knowing that you are both feared and respected. But no, there is one simple motivation." "And that is?" I prompted. "Death." "I'm sorry?" I put down my roll. "Do you know the statistics on most accidents?" I nodded. Almost 90% were human error. The rest were freak accidents, things no one could have stopped. "Most accidents are pilot error. It's our fault. I can't stomach the thought that a student of mine would kill themselves in a plane if I had the power to teach them better." "There hasn't been a fatal accident since we moved though. The last deaths I'd heard of were during the attack." "True and I'll continue to be a jackass if it keeps it that way." He sighed deeply, "You know death, you've lived when so many others died. You know the pain and anguish that comes with it. But have you ever known someone who died from stupidity or ignorance? It's a far worse feeling. With the Rhashi attacked we did everything in our power to stop them and while many pilots gave their life in our defense it was understandable. We consider it a hero's death. But what do you think of a pilot who dies on a routine training flight? He or she might have been at the Air Academy to be allowed to defend this planet, but have they died a hero's death?" He took another deep breath, looking pained, "A year after I finished at the Air Academy there was an accident over the ocean. A friend of mine and his wingmate were supposed to be out doing training over the ocean but had cut it out early to goof off. They decided to descend to only a few feet off the waves and race each other. Admittedly, I've done it before, but at the time didn't understand how dangerous it was. One good gust could tip a wing into a wave and wreck you. That is exactly what happened. It was a windy day and the lead fighters wing dipped in. It was momentary but enough to send him spinning. It wasn't enough that he had killed himself, but as his fighter spun out of control he knocked into his wingmate, killing him too." I could only stare at him as he told me. It was one thing to be told in a sterile classroom. In a classroom the lesson is impartial, told by someone who didn't know the people involved, had no emotional connection to it. To hear Decker tell it, to hear the pain in his voice at the loss of a friend was profound. Without thinking, I put a hand on his forearm. "So, Kayla, you know what drives me to be the asshole I am. I can't stand the thought of one of my student dying like that." He stood abruptly and strode from the dining room. It was only when I thought I saw a glimmer on tears in his eyes did I realize that I had tears streaming down my face. Decker closed the door to his bedroom as he wiped tears from his cheeks. It had been years since the accident but he still felt the sharp pain of loss and a twinge of guilt. It should have been me, he thought, I should have died. He lay face up on the bed and scrubbed his cheeks and thought about the day of the accident. Guilt and grief welled up inside him. He was supposed to have been on that flight, but had been pulled off for being sick. A nasty virus had swept through his unit that week and people who didn't usually fly together were being paired up. Most of the time a more experienced pilot was paired up with a younger wingmate for that type of flight. Decker was supposed to have been more senior wingmate but when he got sick they paired his usual partner up with another junior wingmate. Together they hadn't had the experience to know better. Decked felt tears run down his cheeks again. Why couldn't he have just flown that day? Why couldn't he have just manned up and flown to keep those two out of trouble? He mentally kicked himself. It still horrified him that he was all that could stand between a high flying idiot and death. He'd failed out more than his fair share of students but didn't regret any of them. If it saved their life it was worth the hateful stares. After Decker's abrupt departure I went to the washroom to dry my face and blow my nose. It was hard to believe that I had been that affected by his story. It really helped answer some questions though. Instead of seeing Decker as some sort of overzealous ass or a closet sadist I started to see his position. Maybe Alana had been right saying that he wasn't as big an ass once you got to know him. I wandered back to the dining room wondering what to do with dinner. I wasn't really hungry but couldn't stand to see food go to waste. Not knowing anything else to do I scraped the food from my plate onto his, covered it with a towel and set it in the cooler. The idea of losing myself in my consol was tempting but as I walked to the couch I realized I could hear Decker crying. Absurd! Men like him don't cry. I mean, he's an ass right? An unemotional slab of hate and muscle sent to terrify students and fail them out, right? Hell, I knew I didn't really believe that anymore. I also knew I wasn't such a frigid bitch that I could just leave him alone like that. Quietly, I crept along the hallway to his door. I slowly opened it, hoping he wouldn't start yelling at me for invading his privacy. When I had the door opened far enough to be able to slip through he still hadn't even noticed. I tip toed to the edge of the bed, uncertain. Do I hug him, pat him on the back, get him a tissue? I decided on the latter, grabbing one from the bedside table. Tissue in hand I knelt next to the bed. Decker finally noticed I was there when I started to kneel next to him. His hand reached out to my wrist, clasping it lightly. I offered my tissue. It was promptly taken and used. "Thank you." "You're welcome." I paused unsure what to say. "Is there ... anything I can do?" He sighed and rolled over, putting his back to me. "No. I'm sorry, I never break down like this. It's just..." he sighed. I knelt there letting the seconds tick by. I could hear him sniff occasionally and knew he was still crying. Who knew a man like this could even cry? Taking a deep breath I got up off my knees and sat on the bed. When he didn't move I moved closer, finally laying down next to him. My stomach fluttered wildly as I slid an arm under his head and draped the other over his shoulder. Sure, he was a jerk, a bully, and had been moments away from being a rapist, but he was human and hurting. Even I couldn't deny him whatever small degree of comfort I might be able to give him. At first he didn't seem to notice that I had wrapped my arms around him but after a few minutes he lay his hands on top of mine and squeezed. I heard him take a few ragged breaths then his breathing began to settle and slow. Perhaps a half hour passed before I realized that he'd gone to sleep. Gently I let go of him and got off the bed. While I'd seen a more human side of him I still was scared to be in a bed with him. His bed was comfy but the couch seemed like a safer bet. As I settled myself with a spare pillow and blanket my mind churned over the events of the day. I couldn't believe it sometimes how your perspective can be changed so quickly. ------- Chapter 9 Despite the emotional turmoil I'd felt earlier I managed to doze off quickly and deeply. I was so deeply asleep in fact, that I didn't wake up when Decker came out later, scooped me up and carried me to his bed. When I woke in the morning I was stunned to find myself curled up in his arms. One was under my head the other laying across my waist with one hand curled just below my breast. I tensed and the slight movement woke him. I felt the arm at my waist tighten then drag me to him. "Hands!" "Huh?" Was his sleepy reply. "You said you'd keep hands off!" I accused. He mumbled an apology as he let me go. "Yeah, I did, sorry. Wasn't really awake yet." He yawned as I scooted to the edge of the bed. What I didn't tell him was that I almost enjoyed waking up like that. It seemed some what comforting and safe to have him wrapped around me like that. But thoughts of Friday spurred me to avoid anything that might give him ideas. I decided that I didn't really want to be near him and the bed any more I got up and padded to his bathroom. Since I didn't have to be at work for my patrol for another hour I took a long, hot shower. I luxuriated in the water, letting it run down my body, from the top of my head, down my neck, over my breasts, all the way to my feet. I could get used to this. I would get used to this I thought, when I get my own place! Sighing, I turned off the taps and stepped out. As I toweled off I realized I hadn't thought to grab a fresh coverall before coming in here. I wrapped the towel around myself but it wasn't quite big enough to cover both my chest and my butt. Clutching it tightly I poked my head out the door. Decker was still in bed snoozing. Hoping he'd stay that way I opened the door fully to tiptop out but its creak woke him. He eyed the tiny towel but didn't comment until I'd gathered all my clothes and he was striding to the bathroom himself. "I hope you didn't use all the hot water, you've been in there forever!" I made a face at him. "I'll have you remember that you wanted me here. I hope you can put up with me and my girly habits!" He snorted and closed the door. Once I'd heard it shut I began to dress hoping to be out before he finished. Luck was with me because I was walking out of his front door as I heard him open the bathroom door again. Smiling at my clean get away I strode off towards work. Both work and bunker duty were uneventful. The scheduling god's smiled on me and gave me the western route again so I got to enjoy a little low level river chasing. During bunker duty Amanda told me that her winning bid had been placed by her Academy class as a group. They had pooled their credits under one name but told her that she could choose which of them would be allowed to father her child. Knowing that she too would go for a reasonably high price they decided that their method offered her some choice and gave them a better chance than that might have had if they'd gone in with just their individual credits. Amanda smiled and said that with her maternity options being so open she may consider having more than one child. I considered what she said as we walked back from duty. Would more men vying for my attention be better or worse? How would I decide? Sure, the choices were narrowed down but there was still a choice to be made somewhere. Then too, how could you decide without hurting someone's feelings? I supposed that they must have known that even if the group won, only one would have the right to her child. Oh well, that was their problem to work out, not mine. I had plenty of my own to work out. My problem was sitting in his living room reading when I got back. Hoping to avoid him still I chose to get out and go for another run. My legs still ached from yesterday but I was hoping to loosen them up with a short run. The day was no less beautiful that yesterday and just as pleasantly cool as I started out. At the outskirts I started down the hill, wishing as I always did, that it was an uphill starting off. That way coming back would be easy and not the uphill fight it always was. As the hills and miles rolled by my mind wandered back to this morning. I'd woken up cradled in Decker's arms and had felt little, if none, of the shame and humiliation I'd felt the previous times I'd found myself there. I realized that Alana really was right, I just didn't know him well enough. I'd only known him as the biggest asshole around, no depth, no emotions other than anger and annoyance. Breathing deeply, I pushed myself faster. It felt good to feel the wind and sunlight flow over me. Rounding the corner back to the camp I briefly considered going to Alana and Cooper's to pump them for more information about Decker but decided against it. Showing up at Alan's uninvited was normal, but I doubted my welcome if I did it while dripping sweat. Again, I felt calmed by the natural beauty of the world I lived in and was much refreshed when I walked back into Decker's apartment a half hour later. Decker was nowhere in sight as I walked through the living room to his bedroom. Thinking he must have gone out I began to tug off my sweaty clothes as I headed to the bathroom and was practically naked when I opened the door. As I stepped through the threshold I didn't know who was more shocked, myself or Decker, who was currently in the shower. Blushing scarlet for probably the millionth time in a few days I mumbled "sorry" and started to back out. "No, you might as well come in. The hot water's about to run out," he beckoned for me to join him. Desire to be far away from a naked Decker warred with loathing of a cold shower. In the end Decker's promise to keep his hands to himself skittered through my brain and I chose the shower. Taking off the last of my clothes I nervously climbed in with him. He smiled at me, not having stopped staring since my unexpectedly bursting in. Once wet I washed my hair then twirled it on top of my head, so it wouldn't get any of my body soap on it. I turned around, trying to ignore Decker as I searched for my soap. "Here," he said lathering it up, "allow me." His hands started at my shoulder and soaped me up from there to my wrists. He then ran the bar across my shoulder blades and rubbed it from there to the top of my butt. Shivers followed his hands as the worked. The warm feeling that I had felt the first time he kissed me reappeared. He prodded me gently in the shoulder indicating that I should turn. I did so and he began to soap my front. His fingers soft on my skin he swept small circles along my collar bone to my breasts. Gasping, I could feel my nipples pucker, despite the warm water flowing over me. I could see a small smile on his face as I looked up at him, but he stuck to business, continuing to my flat belly. His hands smoothed soap over my hips and down my legs, gently massaging my calves. Once done he straightened up again displaying a full erection. Embarrassed, I turned and dunked myself under the cooling spray. "You said you'd keep your hands off," I told him, unable to meet his eyes when I turned to rinse my back. "True, I would have stopped, had you asked." "Yes ... I know ... you're just ... uhm..." I stuttered and pointed vaguely at his erection. "Ah. I promised not to touch, but I can't help how I react to you standing naked in front of me." I shut off the shower and stepped lightly out. He followed me, taking the towel I offered him. "I'm not sorry. You are beyond attractive." He grabbed my upper arm lightly, pulling me too him. My eyes flicked up to his and I was unable to break eye contact even as he leaned in to kiss me. The kiss was hot, his lips parting mine, his tongue gently rubbing mine. With half a sigh I leaned closer to him. He dropped his towel and put his other hand on my arm. Suddenly the fear, hurt and anger from a few nights ago thundered back into my body. With a gasp of fear I broke the kiss and ran out of the bathroom, trailing my towel behind me. Before he could follow I had thrown on my clothes from earlier that day and was out the door. Tears blinded me as I ran from the apartment. Confusion at my reaction warred with the hurt and humiliation that had flooded back into me. Just hours earlier I'd thought I was starting to see him as human but as soon as he had grabbed me with both hands I ran like a scared rabbit. Without conscious thought I'd run to Alana's and my thudding steps scared a bird off her porch. "Alana!" I hollered at her while pounding on the door. I glanced briefly behind me to see if Decker had followed me and when I looked back Cooper had opened the door. "Coop, is Alana there?" "Yeah, hon, she's making dinner. You ok?" "No." I pushed past him and headed to their kitchen. Alana took one look at me then turned to Cooper. "Honey, please finish dinner for me." She put down her wooden spoon and we walked into the office. Alana sat me in her over stuffed office chair and had me tell her what had happened. She nodded sympathetically as I told her about Decker breaking down, my revelations as I ran and then my intense reaction to his kiss. When I'd finished she was quiet for a few minutes. "Kayla, do you still have nightmares about the attack?" I nodded. "I think it's something like that. I don't remember too much from school before. Air Academy seems to have rotted my brain, but I think it's just a reaction to stress." She heaved herself up and began to pace around the room. "I think I need to talk to Decker. He's needs to back all the way off. It's good that he's said he won't touch you but he still but you in his bed last night, without your permission!" She opened the office door, beckoning to me. "Come on, I'll walk you home." After telling Cooper that she was heading out for a bit, we walked back in silence. Before we even got close enough to see my block we saw Decker wandering the dirt road. He caught sight of us and looked like he was going to speak but the look on Alana's face stopped him. After a wordless exchange between the two he fell in behind us. Once inside Alana turned to Decker, pointed to his office until he started walking there then turned to me. "One of these days I'll make you fight your own battles. Until then, sleep on the couch." Glumly I nodded. She waddled in after Decker as I curled up on the couch. ------- Chapter 10 "She's too young for this, Decker." "No she isn't. She'll be 18 soon enough and by the letter of the law she's been old enough for almost 2 years." "You know what I mean." Alana sighed deeply. "She's like all of my generation. Almost all of us lost our parents and had no really loving guidance during our formative teenage years. The normal angst, romance, and sheet soaking monkey-sex was absent from our youth for that vast majority." She chuckled and patted her belly. "Well, I guess some of us got lucky. You have a few years on her, you got to experience those things but she never has. This isn't just her first time sexually. Emotionally, she's never been to this place either. You, my friend are breaking all kinds of new ground!" She reached over and patted his knee. Decker leaned his head back against his chair and scrubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands. His hands, which could deftly guide and jet 100 feet from the ground at supersonic speeds and yet one touch of Kayla's skin and he was lost. Alana was right: he'd had his youthful follies and had soaked his fair share of sheets. Despite being somewhat of a playboy he'd also had his share of emotional turmoil to learn from. "You're right Alana ... like always. So what do I do, where do I go from here?" "Well, she doesn't trust you. I don't think there are many people she really, truly trusts. I'd say start there. So when you tell her you'll keep your hands off then keep your damn hands off!" She swatted at him playfully. "Other than that: be her friend. That can help you build the emotional trust she needs as well. Oomph!" A look of pain crossed her face. "This little one does not want to stay quiet!" Alana heaved herself up from the chair and started across the room. "Be gentle. Be kind. Show her you aren't the Evil Decker every student comes to fear." Decker followed her out of the room and walked her to his door. As he reached for the door handle his eyes darted to Kayla asleep on his couch. "Just leave her tonight. She'll join you when she's ready." He nodded again and squeezed her shoulder as she waddled off into the night. Sighing deeply, he walked towards his room. Unable to resist, he brushed a stray lock of hair from Kayla's face as he walked by. When I woke up the next morning I was still on Decker's couch. He had shaken my shoulder then nodded towards the bedroom. He smelled like soap and clean water so I could only guess that his little head nod was to indicate that he was done with the shower and that I could shower alone today. I let the water flowed over me, caressing me. Even now showers still felt like a luxury. The feel of the warm water sweeping down my shoulders, to my breast and past my belly. I lazily ran the soap over my stomach not quite washing but not quite caressing myself. As my fingers played over my flat belly my mind wander to Decker and our shower. I could almost feel his hands sliding across me and I felt my nipples pucker at the thought. My right hand dipped lower and gently brushed my clit. Maybe I wasn't the innocent Decker thought I was. I may not have been with a man but I did know a little about sexuality. My left hand began massaging my breast as I thought of Decker's erection. He has said the he couldn't help it and I wonder what it might feel like to let him inside me. I leaned against the wall letting my head fall back as I rubbed harder, occasionally slipping a finger along my soaked slit. I thought about how he must have felt running his finger along my wet slit. Still massaging my breasts I rubbed faster and harder. I decided to pretend it was Decker envisioning his big fingers circling my clit, strumming it, teasing it until I was gasping. I pushed one finger inside myself and used my thumb to finally push myself over the edge. "Kayla, hurry up. We're going to be late if you take any longer." I jerked up right. Had he heard me? Quickly, I turned off the taps. "Yeah, I'm coming. Just give me a moment." I hurriedly dried off and threw my coveralls on. We walked to work in relative silence. I didn't offer any explanation for my lengthy shower and he didn't ask. It was hard to keep from thinking about my shower as I walked beside him. Yes, he was an ass. Yes, I was still scared of him. But I was still human and he's damn hot! Desire and fear warred within and by the time we got to work I still couldn't decide if I really wanted him in the shower with me or if it was just a fantasy, too safe to be reality. There was almost a buzz in the air when we got to work. There seemed to be more people than usual scurrying from office to office or grouped in corners talking quietly. "What do you thinks' up?" I asked Decker, speaking to him for the first time that morning. "Dunno. Hey!" Decker grabbed the shoulder of the next man to walk past. Surprised he turned and I saw it was Cody. "Cody? What are you doing over here? I thought your training got delayed when you got sick?" I pulled him in for a hug. "Yes, technically I'm still attached to the school but they pulled everyone in today. You didn't hear?" "No, I guess not. What's up?" "Something's been nibbling on the DEWS. They got a single hit last night and another single hit really early this morning." "So they're calling everyone in for investigative patrols?" Decker asked. "Yeah, I guess so, sir. If you want, they're starting a briefing in the main room in a few minutes." I was glad Decker hadn't let me be late. The room was packed already. The few chairs in the building had been moved here but they were already filled. Tension seemed to ooze out of every pore as people began grabbing space along the walls finally flowing out into the hall. I'd felt this kind of nervous energy in the days after the attack. It was the kind of energy that could take over the mind and body. The commander walked in trailed by his second in command. He stood at the front of the room searching faces, as if counting noses to be sure we really were all here. "Ladies and gentlemen as some of you already know there have been two anomalous hits on the DEWs in the last 14 hours. So far, we have no information as to what it might be. Until we can be sure that it was just an anomaly and not a legitimate hit we will be flying expanded patrols. You will be paired up and sent out on long range, as well as high orbit, sweeps. At this point it seems unwise to arm the jets but you will be allowed to carry personal protection in case of an accident. The patrol rosters will be posted as soon as we are done here. If you are not flying then you are home resting. If we need you we will call you in. Dismissed." He turned and walked out of the now stuffy room. As he walked out his second started passing out rosters. Decker, Cody, and I were some of the last to get them as we were at the back of the room. "Cody you're flying with an instructor." "Yeah, Kayla, you didn't think they'd let me go by myself. Everyone who is within a month of graduation is flying on instructor-student patrols. But we get mostly the short range flights." He skimmed the sheet. "Looks like you and Decker are on a long one tomorrow. I guess you get the day off!" Decker took the sheet from him, skimmed it then nodded. "Well, I guess its back to the house until very early tomorrow." He nodded to Cody and walked to the door. "See ya kiddo." He said and hugged me before I followed after Decker. I was a little afraid to spend the full day alone with Decker but we spent the majority of the day in our solitary pursuits, him reading and me on my consol. We did take a walk before dinner which gave us a chance to talk, mostly about the upcoming flight. I was nervous and he understood. He told me stories about some of his first flights and how they had been benign but seemed to huge at the time. The conversation continued through dinner as we discussed the route we wanted to take tomorrow. It was nice to talk to Decker as a peer. It was also nice to not be the subject of discussion for once. While I didn't listen in, I knew most of the time he and Alana spoke it was about me. Just before bed I gave half a thought to joining Decker but decided that it was still too soon. I may be able to fantasize about him in the shower but he was still a little too scary to be snuggled up to. ------- Chapter 11 "Ground, Sentry 21 flight ready to taxi." I sighed into my mask because I could tell Decker was pissed just by hearing him on the radio. "Sentry 21 flight you're cleared to the active runway. I've got the tower up when you're ready to take off." "Sentry 21 flight copies, taxiing." I fumbled to latch my mask and put down my visor while trying to follow Decker's jet out. Flying with him again still made me nervous and knowing he was pissed didn't make it any better. Granted, I knew he wasn't pissed at me but still. It's disconcerting. We had both made it to the flight building with what should have been plenty of time but with the extended patrols they'd started issuing extra gear. It had taken us 20 minutes to check out the new equipment which was mostly extra survival gear and rations as well as a small hand gun. Decker's agitation had only grown when we got our weather report showing thick cloud decks blanketing most of our route. Low clouds meant no goofing off on a low level route to blow off steam at the end of the patrol. "Kayla, you ready for takeoff?"I heard Decker come over the secondary radio, one we used solely between jets. "Stand by, running my checks now." I gave the controls a good yank left and right, watching the wings to be sure things were moving the right way. Satisfied that I wouldn't have problems I came back with, "Sentry 22, ready to take off." "Tower, Sentry 21 flight is ready for immediate." "Roger, winds are calm cleared for takeoff." Following Decker's jet onto the runway, I took one deep breath then counted 15 seconds. I could feel the rumble from Decker's jet deep in my chest. With practiced ease I hit 15, pushed up my throttles and started rolling down the runway just as Decker's wheels left the ground. As Decker made the post takeoff calls back to the flight building to let them know we had taken off I caught up to him and took my position off his right wing. "Kayla, you can fly out to extended trail since it just a patrol today, not need to be that close." I let my jet start drifting further from his. "Aww, but Decker, what if I wanted to snuggle up?" I asked, feeling mischievous. It wasn't quite flirting but it was as close as I guess I get. "Oh yeah, now that we're separated by a mile and two aluminum cockpits ... now you get snuggly on me!" I saw him rock his wings and roll right to follow our route. "Start climbing, I want to get the high level route done first." "Sure thing boss man. Want me to snuggle up close again after the climb or stay out in trail?" I started flipping switches that would allow my jet to start burning us out of the stratosphere into the mesosphere. "No, keep in extended. As much as I'd like a good snuggle I'm more concerned with how the jet's going to perform this high up." "Oh come on, Decker, we're fine. I'm showing green in here and we're only halfway into the meso!" I paused to look outside. This was possibly the best part of the flight. Above me the sky had turned from blue to a dark blue and then black. By the time we hit to top of the mesosphere and started our orbital leg I was able to see stars. Well below my horizon I could see clouds and the line between air and space was clearly visible. At this altitude we were barely flying. The air was so thin for our jet stubby wings weren't providing much lift; we were mostly dependant on Sir Newton and his laws of gravity. "Ok Decker, I'm showing us skimming the top of the meso and I'm in the green." "Roger, I've got the same. Now you can snuggle up you little temptress but keep your eyes on the scanners. I want to know if there's really something up here." I slowly began working my way back in again. Despite the thinness of the air I still had a fair amount of maneuverability. "Ok, Decker, I've got everything up and running but I don't see anything yet. How long is the orbital leg again?" "Twenty minutes tops, we wouldn't have the gas for the low level if we stay longer. Just keep an eye on the gauges; I'll let you know when we he hit our time limit." "Got it." I scanned my gauges again; nothing seemed out of the ordinary. My right engine oil pressure was a little low but the outside air pressure at about 4% of what it was on the ground that was to be expected. I kept scanning my instruments and gauges while the seconds ticked slowly by. At least, I thought to myself, Decker's in a better mood now. A little flirting goes a long way I suppose. "Kayla?" Decker voice had changed. The business like tones he used when talking on the radio was gone. "Yeah Decker..." I let my voice trail off as a pause seemed to build. "Why don't you want to sleep in my bed?" "Because you..." I paused. I was going to tell him how much he scared me, but after the last few days, that wasn't as true anymore. "I'm afraid of what would happen if I did. Look, I didn't want this and I don't think that this is really what you expected. To you, I'm supposed to be this happy and willing bedmate that shoots out kids for you. I never wanted this but now I'm bound to you by some stupid gold ring because everyone on this freaking mud ball planet is too busy to get busy except for my former roommate! I mean honestly, you can't tell me that I'm exactly what you expected and wanted?" It all came out in a rush. I let my eyes sweep the gauges and instruments again. I could tell the right engine oil pressure was still a tad low but it was still within the operating limits though so I didn't mention it. "No, you aren't what I expected." I could hear him sigh through the radio. From where I was all I could see of him in the cockpit was his shoulder and the side of his helmet. "Look, I'm sorry that this happened. No, that's a lie. I'm not sorry that this happened because if it hadn't I wouldn't have you, even if that's in name only. I am sorry that you are an unwilling participant." "You mean you really wanted me? Me Kayla, not me the unwilling former student? 'Cause that would be a little more kink that I think I can deal with!" "Yes, Kayla you. I do have some kinks, which one day I will happily share with you if you would like, but that isn't why. I respect that you aren't just one of the strongest and smarted students I've met, but one of the smartest and strongest people I know. I like you." He paused and I flicked my eyes over the gauges again. "Is there anyone that you like? I mean, I assume that there isn't or you would have chosen him to father your children but ... I mean, I really kind of hope not." "No, no one real anyway." The right engine oil pressure had now dropped just under the limit. "There was really only one guy," I thumped the gauge with my thumbnail, "but it's been so long now, I'm not sure if he's even really real. I may have just dreamed him up." After thumping the gauge the needle sunk lower. "Decker, I think one of engines is having a problem, the oil pressure seems to be dropping." "Yea, that happens up here. How bad is it?" "Just barely below tolerance." "Keep an eye on it; we've only got three minutes left anyway. So who was this guy?" "Nahh, it's dumb, I really don't think he was real." "Try me." "I think he was the pilot who ferried me from the mainland south. I think he told me that he didn't have a second person in his plane and that he'd enjoy my company." I thumped the gauge again and the needle went to zero. "Kayla, that was-" "Shit! Decker, we gotta descend. It just went to zero! I'm gonna lose this fucking engine!" I pushed both throttles up and turned away from him and hoped that the increase in fuel flow would cause the pressure to rise. I kept one eye on Decker's jet and one of the needles, silently begging it to rise again. "I'm dropping down, Decker." I pushed the nose over, diving towards the ground. Both eyes on the gauges now I could feel myself being pushed back into the seat as the jet built up more speed. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Decker pulling alongside me. "Deep breath, Kayla, calm down. Keep your eyes on the gauges and keep increasing the throttles. You've got eighty thousand feet still to get the engine back to normal before you'd have to bail out." "I've got the throttles full up, the needles just fluttering." "Ok, pull it back the throttles and nose up a bit, if it's not going to come back there's no need to lose altitude now." "I know what I'm doing!" I screamed over the radio. Infuriating man was acting like he didn't just ensure I was trained for this a month ago. "I'm back to eighty percent throttle and I'm only fifteen degrees nose low. Shut up for five seconds and let me deal with this!" I could see his jet fall back behind mine and the radios went quiet. As the power and airspeed slowly bled back I checked the gauges again. I was at sixty thousand feet now, almost to the top of the stratosphere where the jet would start performing more like a plane and less like a rocket. Taking a deep breath I realized I'd dropped nearly one hundred thousand feet in only a few minutes. I pulled back on the flight controls to bring the jet's nose level with the horizon noting that my engine oil pressure was finally off the zero mark. It was still lower than tolerances allowed but I'd be able bring the jet limping home on an engine and a half. I took another deep breath, "Ok Decker, I'm level and the gauge is off of the peg. It's still reading below limits but I think we can take it home now." "Good to know, I'll call it in." Fuming from my cockpit I followed him back home. How could be praising my intelligence one minute then treating me like I didn't know my own plane the next? We landed uneventfully and taxied back to our parking spots. I was still shutting down my ailing engine as I watched him walking up to my jet. Giving the throttle a final push into place I popped my canopy. "Kayla, I already called the maintainers they'll start working to fix it but they'll have a few questions." "I know! I'm not a damn child Decker and I'm not your student anymore." I gave him one of my most murderous glares and turned to walk away. I only got two steps before his massive hand grabbed my upper arm. "Let go! I don't have anything else to say to-" Before I finish Decker had pulled me to his chest, kissing me fiercely. This was no gentle exploratory kiss. This kiss told me about desperate need. His hands pinned me to him and all I could do was feebly beat on his chest with my fists. Finally he broke the kiss and held me tightly to him. "I'm sorry Kayla. I just ... I thought I was going to lose you. I didn't mean to demean you I was just so scared!" Most of my anger melted away but I didn't know what to say to him. I pushed at his chest and he let me go. Seething with building rage I hauled back and punched him in the chest as hard as I could. He didn't drop to the ground in pain like I might have hoped but he gave a soft "oof" and clutched at his chest. "You can't keep doing this! I have feelings and every time you do this kind of thing you make me scared of you again. I don't know how to react! I ... I just can't deal with this right now." I turned from him again and strode into the flight building, hoping he'd have the good sense not to follow after me. ------- Chapter 12 If I were vain, I would have been crushed to know that my engine malfunction was by no means the worst thing to happen today. Fortunately, I'm not that vain and gave a silent thanks to whatever gods might be listening that I wasn't that unlucky. The more unlucky flier got the joy of ejecting at a mere thousand feet in some of the most rugged landscape our planet had to offer. I sat with Jolene, a fellow instructor of Decker's and one of the rarified female fliers, who's partner was the unlucky ejectee. Jolene and Martin had gone up as an instructor/student pair as Decker and I had and made it through their orbital phase with no problems. However, once they got down to the low level Martin's plane sucked a bird into one of his two jet engines and had to make the split second decision to eject or try to save the plane. No one blamed him for choosing ejection as the planes could, mostly, be replaced but trained fliers were scare. Plus, who can put a price on human life? "He's one lucky little shit," Joleene remarked for the third time in my hearing, "I just hope they find him soon." She sighed deeply and looked up at the ready room monitor for signs that the rescue party had located and extracted Martin. I felt a little numb when I looked at her. Her hair was still oily from sweat being unable to escape her helmet meaning she hadn't showered yet. If I'd punched out would Decker still be wandering around the ready room, waiting for a sign of me? "Don't worry too much about it. It's only been two hours and it takes at least an hour and a half just to get to the route you were on." I gently patted her arm, "Besides, you saw him stand up and walk away the crash site yourself, didn't you?" She nodded. It was standard procedure for the closest jet airborne to stake out an accident site: looking for survivors, calling in the location, staying on scene until rescue planes could arrive. "Yes, I did. It's just..." She sighed again and I could see a hint of tears at the corner of her eye. She and Martin had been close prior to the big auction and rumor had it that they'd even been sexually intimate. But since the auction a lot of quietly intimate couples had had their private lives thrown open to the public so that the female half could keep her man. "I know Jolene." I patted her hand and wondered, did I really know? I mean ... I'd feel bad if Decker went missing, but would I cry? Could I? Still angry at his attitude earlier in the day I couldn't make up my mind. The man was still infuriating me but at least now he seemed to be doing it inadvertently instead of with the deliberate and practiced ease that I used to associate with the "Decker Stare". It seemed too much to work out. I was normally driven mostly by emotion and only rarely, like while flying, by logic but the last few days had burnt me out and put me into emotional overload. My mind jumped back to the night of the auction and I felt my cheeks flush. Embarassment, shame, and just a hint of lust threatened to overwhelm me. Tears started forming and I felt like I couldn't think! Giving Jolene's hand a final squeeze I decided I'd had enough emotional overload for the day and walked to the door. I could feel the warm spring sun through my coverall as I walked back to Decker's place. I knew he would probably be helping with Martin's rescue for a little while longer and that I could probably count on some drama free peace and quiet if I went home now. As I let my long legs carry my quickly home I contemplated going for a run. A nice, long run, where my mind could wander and my body follow. I pause for a moment, eyes close, facing the sun. I took a deep breath and let the warm breeze and sunlight dry the tears. Resolute and determined to get my run in I started walking back again. I was so involved in the idea of going for a run that I was on autopilot as I walked in the door. I started shucking my coverall as soon as the door closed behind me. I was in only underwear by the time I reached Decker's bedroom and shocked the hell out of both of us when I walked through the door. "Crap, you aren't supposed to be here." I muttered and strode to my half, quarter really, of his closet. Decker was laying on the bed, face up, clutching a small bit of paper and I didn't really feel like getting within grabbing range right now. That was exactly the kind of drama I was trying to avoid. "Kayla, I live here. Of course I'm supposed to be here." "That's not what I meant. I thought you'd still be at work. I'm just grabbing my stuff and going out for a bit." I rummaged through my side, snagging shorts, a shirt, and shoes in one fell swoop. "Running away again?" It was a deceptively innocuous question. "Am I running? Yes." I didn't want him to think he could get a rise out of me. I tugged my shorts on then quickly slipped into my shirt. Deciding that I could brave the bed momentarily, I sat lightly on the edge as I pulled on my shoes. As I bent over to tie the knot on my left shoe I could feel the bed shift. Knowing it was probably Decker moving closer to me, popped up off the bed, shoe half tied and walked out of the room. "I'll be back in an hour." I called over my shoulder. "Don't be too long. I want to talk to you about this piece of paper over dinner." I looked back to see him waving the scrap he'd been holding. Somewhere in my brain a memory struggled to rise but died as quickly as it came. It was probably just some information about the engine malfunction he'd scribbled down. I'd worry about it later. I could feel my body loosen as I started jogging away from Decker's place. I could almost feel the stress sliding off my body. When I first started flying it wore me out so much that I would only be able to run on weekends. Not that I minded because it was the only time Alana was free to run with me. She wasn't the endurance runner I was but it was still nice to get in a morning jog with her so we could catch up on student gossip. I frowned a little as I picked up my pace since I knew it would be a while before Alana and I could run together again. Even after she had he baby she'd probably be more interested in the kid than hanging out with me. We really had a lot of fun gossiping together. We talked about which guys were lucky enough to find girls to hook up with, which instructors where attractive, and who my mystery pilot could have been. It had been a subject of much debate between the two of us. We knew that one of the instructors had to be the one who'd ferried me over but it had been so long I couldn't put a face to him. All I remembered was the little piece of paper... "Oh. Fuck." ------- Chapter 13 I stopped dead in my tracks. The last little bit of fantasy in my life and it turns out to be Decker? It wasn't fucking fair! My mind spun in circles. Was it really Decker? Of course it was, how else would he have that paper? It was the paper I was thinking of, right? No, it had to have been notes from the engine problem. But then, why was he acting so depressive over it? What the fuck was going on? "Fuck." Sure, I was repeating myself, but, hell! Why Decker? 'Why not?' A little voice in the back of my mind interjected. 'It's not exactly like his touch makes your skin crawl.' Stupid little voice. Never the less it wasn't wrong. Decker might terrify my some days but he was still attractive. Was our fighting was half out of anger but half out of suppressed lust? 'Yes.' No! He's scary, he humiliated me, and I don't like him. 'Liar'. Stupid inner monologue! Frustrated, I took a deep breath and decided to head back. I had to sort this out now or I'd be an emotional wreck until I did. Without thinking, I picked up my pace, my subconscious trying to get me home sooner. By the time I made it back to Decker's apartment I was panting and soaked in sweat. My hand hesitated on the door knob. Surely Decker had heard me walking up the steps to the door but I needed a moment to cool down mentally and literally. I put my hands on my head and walked back down the steps breathing deeply. My racing thoughts had slowed as I ran because I was more intent on not falling and breaking an ankle than on Decker but now that I had stopped my brain started racing again. What was it about him? What was it with me? I was scared of him when I thought about it but I wasn't when I just let it all go. It was so nice to wake up in his arms but I'd bolted like a scared bunny from his shower. Was I scared of him or me? Probably him. Maybe me. I walked in quick circles trying to calm down. Finally giving up I walked back in. As I shut the door I could hear Decker in his office typing at his consol. He didn't look up as I walked but I knew he'd heard me come in. "Hungry?" His voice rumbled out as I walked past. "Uhm, yeah, kinda." "OK, dinner in 30 then." I grunted vaguely and kept heading to the shower, stripping as I went. The shower spray felt soothing after my hard run. It had been easy enough on the way out but my calves were screaming in pain from running so hard on the way back. Maybe I could talk Decker into rubbing them for me ... or maybe I would run away scared again. Fuck! This had to end. I finished rinsing and stepped out of the shower. Sure, Decker scared me but this back and forth had to end. Scary or not he was still hot and there was only one way to get out of his clutches. I'd have sex, verify I was pregnant and get my own place. Resolute, I walked out of the bathroom, still naked. I knew I was blushing as I walked down the hall but I got the effect I wanted. As soon as I came into view Decker dropped the bowl he was holding. "Kayla?" He stooped to pick up the bowl, "are you ok? You still want dinner right?" I kept walking up to him, not breaking eye contact. "Kiss me." My voice was soft but demanding. "What?" I took the bowl and put it on the counter. "Kiss me. I want you to touch me, kiss me." He put his hands on my shoulder looking into my eyes, trying to fathom what was going on. "Are you sure? This is what you want?" I could see the bulge growing in his pants. "Yes. Just kiss me, damn it!" I stomped my foot like a small child. Why was he being so dense? Only a few days ago he was practically ripping my clothes off. I stood on my tip toes and planted my lips on his. At first he didn't respond but then I felt his lips part and his tongue dart into my mouth, tasting me. I moaned softly and leaned into him. I wanted to think it was just en encouragement, not that I felt something but the warmth spreading through me told a different story. Decker's hands slide down my arms to my hips. He picked me up and set me on the lip of the counter, wrapping my legs around his hips. He pushed his hips lightly against mine. I slid my hands up to his neck and allowed the fingers of one hand to twine in his hair. The kiss gained speed rapidly as hi hands started making their way between my legs. I tried not to flinch as they reached my pussy but I couldn't help it. Decker felt me flinch and stopped, breaking our kiss. He leaned his forehead on shoulder. "Why are you doing this Kayla?" His words rose up quietly. "Do you really want this or are you just trying to run again?" I felt myself blush deeply at being that transparent. "I just-" I stopped, choking on tears. "I just wanted to be done with this. I hoped it was like a bandage, if you did it really fast it wouldn't hurt as much." Horrified I felt the tears slide down my cheek onto his shoulder. "Do you trust me?" "I ... yes? No. I don't know" "That's enough of an answer. You aren't ready for this yet. Just-" he paused as if the words pained him to say, "just give it some more time. I want you to trust me. Hell, I'd be happy if you just liked me!" "I do, sort of. I liked waking up with you the other day. It felt ... nice." "Ok, we'll start with that. Just do things that feel ... nice. Then work from there. Okay?" "You don't mind?" "Hell, I've got the worst case of blue balls ever, but no, I'll be ok." I looked down at him, still resting his head on my shoulder and he smiled at me. "Now, if you'll excuse me. I need a cold shower before I finish fixing dinner." He pushed away from me. "Put some damn clothes on! And do me a favor, huh? Finish chopping those roots." I nodded then followed him back to the bedroom to grab clothes while he showered. Dinner was uneventful and I managed to keep from blushing over my embarrassment at my abortive attempt at seducing Decker. After dinner we both cleared and cleaned the dishes, not talking much. Once the small kitchen was cleaned we went our separate ways, he to his office me to my consol. I dove deeply into my game letting the escapist fantasy steal my thoughts of earlier away. A few hours later I was starting to nod off and considered just shutting down the consol and curling up on the couch. As the consol finished its shut down Decker walked out of his office. "Ready for bed?" I had a brief moment where I wanted to tell him I'd sleep on the couch again but only nodded. He held out his hand and I rose from the couch, taking it as he turned to walk down the hall. As we climbed into bed Decker maintained his word, not grabbing for me. He just lay down, facing me, allowing me to snuggle up to him. "I guess I am getting to snuggle up today." I whispered softly in the dark. He squeezed me close. "Evil little minx. Now go to sleep. Tomorrow will probably be another long day." ------- Incomplete and Inactive ------- Posted: 2008-09-10 Last Modified: 2011-05-02 / 09:15:07 pm Version: 1.10 ------- http://storiesonline.net/ -------