My Evil Queen Can't Possibly Be This Lewd! v1.22
Tags: Dark Queen Tenebra, long, lizardmen, hemipenes, gangbang, oral, vaginal, double penetration, kobold, from behind

With special thanks to cuteanon for creating Tenebra's character design.

       “You have done well to get this far, heroes!” the pale woman exclaimed, throwing up an arm to point at the party before her. She was garbed in a majestic, flowing gown of shimmering crimson; it clung to her figure, held up by a single thin strap on her left shoulder. Her short black hair was decorated with red gemstones tied into braids – they were, perhaps, an assortment of rubies and garnets. She towered over the hall, standing at the top of the stairs that led to her obsidian throne. The beautiful red heels on her feet added a few more inches to her height, a careful consideration that succeeded in increasing her presence. The theme of red, paired with her fair, beautiful complexion and her lustrous hair, gave the woman a profoundly sensual yet violent appearance, befitting a Dark Queen.

        The assorted party before her seemed rather boring in comparison. It was merely an eclectic group of adventurers, each one armed to the teeth and wearing practical (or if you were Tenebra, banal) armor, excepting the bard who was dressed somewhat more provocatively. The villainous figure above looked down upon the adventurers with an expression of utter disdain, not for the fact that they opposed her, but because they had no sense of style.

        “You have overcome the Moat of Malignant Mists, the Bridge of Blistering Breezes, and the Gate of Gauche Guardians! However, it was a mistake to challenge me, the Terrible Temptress, Tenebra! If you throw down your weapons and grovel before me, I may even allow you to leave with your lives!” she shouted. She threw her arms up dramatically, her fingers curling as black energy coalesced around them. She gazed down, her red lips curling into a confident, not-at-all pleasant smile. Perfect, just as she had rehearsed.

        “We will never surrender to you, dark lord!” the Dwarven warrior shouted, standing forward. He appeared to be the leader of the group.

        “Ahem. I am a Dark Queen, or a Dark Lady, not a Dark Lord,” Tenebra snapped.

        “Uh… yeah. Well, you’ve been terrorizing the villages of this land for years! Extorting awful ‘taxes’ from them, bullying them with your minions! Admittedly you haven’t hurt anyone, but you are not the rightful ruler of this land! Those ‘tithes’ are not yours to take! This is not your castle! We seek to overthrow you by any means necessary!” the leader said.

        “How quaint. And how do you expect to do that?” the dark-haired woman asked, a fiendish cackle spilling from her mouth. She snapped her fingers, and a heavily-armored orc appeared from behind a pillar, trotting out onto the stairs in front of her and brandishing a glass warhammer threateningly. At the same time, beautiful tapestries on the walls on each side of the throne room suddenly rolled up, revealing half a dozen hidden alcoves filled with goblins and kobolds, each of them wielding a crossbow. And finally, from the wooden rafters above everyone, a massive crow, easily the size of an eagle, swooped down and alighted upon Tenebra’s left shoulder.

        She inhaled sharply and almost let herself wince at the pain, her bare skin offering no protection from the long, sharp talons that dug deep into her. She feared that they might pierce her flesh and draw blood at any moment – then again, perhaps the extra red would compliment her outfit. However, she was a professional. While the addition of one of her magically-enlarged pet crows was rather last-second, and she had failed to consider the discomfort of it being perched on her naked shoulder, it was nothing to a villainess of her caliber. Her face remained stoic, and she glared down at her foes as everyone awaited the signal to attack.

        Then, the bird crapped. A lot. Tenebra's lips quivered as she felt the warm liquid ooze down her back and the fine silks of her dress, desperately trying to hold back the urge to grab the corvid and wring its throat with her hands. Composure, she told herself. Composure and class. Style. Professionalism. She was no amateur. She could handle this. She would handle this. Focus on the heroes, she told herself. She swallowed down her anger and noticed that the adventurers were whispering amongst themselves. Thanks to a certain spell she had woven around the castle, she was able to listen in on their conversation and could have, in fact, done so from anywhere within a few miles.

        “Watch out! Any orc who can wield a warhammer of glass is surely a frightful opponent! Beware him!” the dwarf hissed to his comrades, raising his battle-axe as the tension in the room grew thick.

        “I am rather more concerned about the riffraff in the walls. Those crossbow bolts are dripping with what could only be poison. Try not to get hit!” the beautiful male elf whispered, his hands drifting down to the pair of daggers on his belt.

        “Do not forget that the dark lord is an infamous spellslinger. Who knows what sort of forbidden magicks she will bring to bear against us? I will attempt to stall her as long as I can, but we will surely need to work together to defeat her,” the human cleric said under his breath. He held up his staff, his first spell of choice already forming in his mind.

        “I will sing ballads of this battle for the rest of my life, friends. Come, let us do battle against evil! For justice!” shouted the half-orc bard. She pulled out her flute, a somewhat exaggerated movement involving several twirls of the instrument and a spin of her own. Tenebra recognized the precision and flamboyance as belonging to a fellow performer, and immediately felt a profound sense of kinship with the unlikely actress.

        However, such was the intensity of the movement that the not-so-subtle jiggles of her momentous bosom – which had been merely covered by a thin cloth brassiere, a strange choice of apparel for an adventurer – drew the eyes of villainess, and moments later, her ire as well. All the good will she felt towards the bard was immediately replaced with envious spite; how dare she overshadow the voluptuousness of a Dark Queen? The crimson-covered woman decided that the half-orc would be the subject of her first debilitating spell, and that she would be particularly cruel, just this once.

        Tenebra stepped forward, the words of a spectacular but mostly harmless curse spilling from her lips. Her sudden movement caused the crow on her shoulder to shift its grip to compensate, a talon finding its way onto the sole strip of silk that held up her dress. The strap held for only a split second before the sharp implement sliced through it. The splendent scarlet silks spilled down the cold marble stairs like flowing blood.

        “Oh my!” the bard said, breaking the ensuing awkward silence. Her shoulders lifted up as she stifled a giggle with her fingers over her lips. The other adventurers all shot each other nervous glances, and the rabble residing in the recesses of the walls struggled to swallow back their chuckles, well aware of the risk of incurring their mistress’s wrath. The orc released an exaggerated sigh when he saw the ruined dress slide past his feet, then immediately straightened up, regretting his unprofessional act.

        For her part, the Dark Queen was remarkably composed. She had nothing to hide, really. She was nude quite often in her line of work, and the sensation of being exposed to the gaze of others no longer held the same exciting edge as earlier in her life – well, it was still fun to tease other people, at least. However, since this was a wardrobe malfunction, rather than one of her classic seduction routines, she could find no pleasure in her nudity beyond relief from her form fitting dress.

        To her surprise, it was the half-orc bard who seemed to be eyeing her up the most. The others peeked, but the musician? She outright stared. Tenebra hardly minded the attention. She was beautiful both dressed and undressed. Her fair skin was flawless. Below her neck, there was not a single hair that might have ruined the radiance of her flesh. Her body was slender, yet toned. And of course, her bust was considerable and round, but nowhere near as indulgent as the one that the half-orc flaunted.

        The armored orc, who served as her aide when not participating in her grandiose displays, cleared his throat loudly and broke the awkward silence. Tenebra blinked, realizing she and the bard had been more or less staring at each other. Stupid sexy bard. She could already hear what Francis would say. She banished those annoying thoughts from her mind and took a deep breath to center herself. When she opened her eyes, the first thing she did was reach up and shoo the crow away. It flew off to perch on the rafters again, cawing grumpily.

        Improvise, she told herself. She smiled at the adventurers and raised an arm to cover her bosom, even though it was extremely belated at this point. Then she made an elegant twirl, spinning in place to turn her back to them and hide her nethers even as she thought up her next villainous speech. “I apologize for that. Such are the trials of fashion, you see. I do not suppose you would allow me to acquire my back-up outfit before we continue this confrontation?” she asked, glancing over her shoulder.

	The sudden roar of laughter from all over the room caused her to start in place. It only took an instant for her to realize her folly in the form of the damp warmth on her back. This time, her face flushed in shame and chagrin and she looked down at the floor, glad she could hide at least that from her enemies. She could handle being stripped bare, but this - this was truly awful. An unmitigated catastrophe! 

	“I should have just let them look at my unmentionables…” she hissed under her breath, her mind racing to find an avenue that would allow her to recover some measure of her dignity. Not a single thing came to mind. 

	The laughter continued for a solid few minutes. Only a handful of individuals in the room had not collapsed into fitful laughter. One was Francis, who instead found the waste of time, money, and effort soul-crushing. Another was a certain kobold who was standing in one of the alcoves, his eyes locked on the fetching temptress, and his heart sore for a different reason. 

	When the cacophony finally died down, Tenebra cleared her throat. “Well. I believe this little encounter is officially over. I appreciate the effort, heroes. Please leave. You will face no danger from me or my subordinates. I will regroup and renovate the castle’s theme, and you may challenge me again in one month’s time,” she said to the throne, her voice carrying behind her to the adventurers. 

	The dwarf, elf, human, and half-orc all nodded to each other. “Yes, we will, er, withdraw for now and come back when you’re a little more prepared. I get the feeling we can afford to do that with you,” the warrior spoke. 

	“Much appreciated,” the Heinous Hegemon said, her voice squeaking slightly. As the adventurers slowly relaxed their guards and turned to leave, the distracted kobold failed to notice his finger slowly tightening around the trigger of his crossbow. Click. Fwing. The wooden bolt hurtled towards the group of four, only for it to crash into the dwarf’s shield, snapping against it but leaving a sizable dent. 

	There was a moment of shock. The party tensed, their reflexes honed to a razor edge from years of experience, and burst into action. The dwarf bolted towards the orc, hefting his axe over his head. Francis flinched and raised his glass warhammer, barely diverting the incoming blow. The glass hammer chipped away in a huge chunk, ruining the beauty of the utterly impractical weapon. The force of the strike knocked the orc down and the hammer right out of his hands, leaving him defenseless.

	The elf pulled out several vials of a peculiar concoction, holding them between his fingers. He hurled the vials at each of the holes in the walls, the vials shattering on the stone floor and exploding with a thick smoke that billowed around. The cleric roared out a prayer to his holy god, summoning up a large magical ward against dark magic that glittered around the party. And last, but certainly not least, the ravishing minstrel placed the flute to her lower lip, her fingers bracing over the appropriate holes to produce her desired chord. 

	Just before the dwarf could deliver a coup de grace to Tenebra’s assistant – or the elf could begin throwing his magical daggers around at the coughing, sputtering cronies in the walls – or the cleric could fire several lethal spells at the sorceress – or the bard could play an enchanting melody – the Dark Queen muttered a couple of words under her breath, throwing her hand out with a slight glow of power around it. 

	The cleric stopped casting his spell and stared down in amazement at the huge sorcery circle that began to shine through the marble floor below the party.  “By the gods! Such a quick mass-displacement-?!” he shouted, just before the four vanished in a flash, leaving behind only the fading glow of the magic runes that dissipated moments later. 

	Francis panted and wiped the sweat from his brow. “My thanks, mistress. I was nearly done for, there.”

Tenebra scowled and huffed, only one thought on her mind, She spun around to glare at each of the wall-alcoves, the smoke clearing up. The assorted kobolds and goblins all glanced around nervously. “Who, dare I ask, shot at the heroes? I gave them my word they would be able to leave safely, and now my word is tarnished. Both parties have suffered an ignoble indignity! I refuse to treat guests in my castle like this! Unacceptable!” 

	Francis had, of course, secretly told the minions not to hit any of the heroes – Tenebra vehemently despised killing and would not tolerate any such nonsense in her domain, despite what an outsider might think. The castle’s alchemist had supplied the rabble with healing salve to rub onto their bolts as well, to reduce the lethality of any accidental wounds. The salve did look something like a poison to the casual observer, so that was a slight bonus. 

	All of the eyes of the small minions shifted to stare at the offender, who shifted uncomfortably in place. The guilty kobold stared at the ground, rubbing his arm. “Do you at least have the gumption to reveal yourself?” the dark-haired woman asked, peering left to right, looking at each and every one of her hired minions with a cold, hard gaze. 

	The bronze-scaled kobold sighed softly, gathering up his willpower to admit the truth. Then someone shoved the offender out of the alcove and into the grand hall, and he fell onto the ground hard due to the surprise. This time, Tenebra’s eyes zeroed in on him immediately. “Günter? It was you?” she asked. Her tone was neutral. He slowly stood up, patting the dust from his chest. His legs shook a little, and he stared straight ahead, at the wall, and nodded. “Look me in the eyes, and say it,” the villainess said, coldly.
 
	He looked up at her and swallowed, trying to muster his bravery to at least stop shaking. But kobolds were not particularly brave creatures to begin with. He looked into her eyes, and spoke, trying to choke back his despair. “I… I loosed the bolt. It was my fault. I’m sorry.”

	Tenebra quietly watched the fidgety kobold, then very simply said, “I am very disappointed in you, Günter.” The words stung him worse than any insult or curse ever could. He averted his gaze, trying to blink back the water that clouded his vision. “Now, you are all off-duty and may relax. I will retire to my baths. Francis, get someone to repair my dress. Also, catch my pet and put her back in the cages with her brothers and sisters. That is all.” The Dictator of Devastation stepped out of her uncomfortable heels and picked them up with her fingers. She walked out of the throne room with all the grace and dignity one with bird poop on their back could have.

	Francis pulled his bulky helmet off and rubbed his temple with his free hand, sighing. “Alright. Günter, while the mistress did not see fit to deliver a proper punishment for your error, you are not off the hook. You catch the bird and take her back like the mistress ordered. Wik’wik, since you pushed him out, you get to mend the dress,” he barked. 

	“Awww! Come on, boss!” Wik’wik, the stubby goblin, groaned. “I was just trying to help ‘im!” 

	“Queen Tenebra did not ask you to reveal who it was, she asked for the perpetrator to reveal themselves. There is a marked difference between the two, and you should know better,” the orc snapped. “Now go do as you have been told! Everyone else, it is time for supper!”



	Günter spent the next several minutes climbing up to the rafters to retrieve the bird. Kobolds were naturally gifted climbers, so there was little risk involved, but he took his time anyways. “Caw! Caw! Murder!” the crow sang as it saw the kobold approaching. It and its siblings had been the subjects of numerous experiments by Tenebra to produce a sapient, speaking aerial assault force. She succeeded in increasing their size, and their intelligence was heightened to an extent, but the only word they had ever really picked up was ‘murder.’ This frustrated the Dark Queen to no end.  

	 “Murder! Murder! Murder!” it called, seemingly nonstop as the kobold carried it on his shoulder through the dark hallways of the castle. He knocked on the door of the aviary and it was opened moments later by Xae’vex, a little old goblin woman. She was Tenebra’s caretaker for the crows. She was covered in heavy wool rags, the bare minimum to keep her old bones warm. Her hair was still thick and long despite her age, the grey locks spilling down her shoulders. Her face and hands were deeply wrinkled, but somewhere behind them, the tiniest hint of her former fiery beauty could be detected by a discerning eye. 

	“Ohhh, Günter! Such a pleasure to see you,” she said, her voice coarse with age. “Is that Harper? Oh, come here little gal, let’s get you back with your sisters. They’ve missed you, you know!” The kobold watched her put the overgrown crow back in her cage with the other females, then turn back to face him, a friendly smile on her face. “Well? How goes things, young man?” she asked, hobbling over to her well-worn wooden rocking chair and slowly lowering herself into it.

	“I messed up, big time,” the despondent one sighed. He stepped inside and shut the door, sitting down on the ground across from the elderly woman and folding his legs in. “I wasn’t paying attention and accidentally shot at one of the heroes. Everybody’s mad.”

	“Everyone? Even the mistress?” she asked as she rocked back and forth slowly. “Was anyone hurt?”

	“No, luckily the bolt only dented a shield. But it’s about the principle of the matter. I should have been more careful!” he said, placing a hand over his eyes. 

	“What was your punishment?”

	“Getting Harper back.”

	“That doesn’t sound so bad,” the wise woman said. “I hardly think it is as bad as you say. If the mistress was truly angry with you, you would have been let go. Wouldn’t you agree?”

	The bronze-scaled kobold thought about it for a while, then nodded.

	“So it sounds like the one who is really angry at you is yourself. You feel like you let her down, don’t you?”

	Again, the kobold nodded, glancing down at a spider that skittered across the floor. The sound of the wooden chair creaking back and forth seemed to echo in the room, the crows strangely quiet for once. 

	“You are too sensitive for your own good, boy. No wonder you didn’t make it as an adventurer! Kekekekeke!” the old woman cackled, her fragile form shaking in the seat. Granny Xae’vex was a retired adventurer with a bit of fame behind her. She had been part of one of the greatest heists in recorded history, making off with a sizable chunk of the Royal Treasury of Weisslund – the country ruled by the white dragons. She had lived a life of excitement and action, ending up as one of the few in her career to retire with an intact body and a comfortable life ahead of her. 

	Some rumors floating around the minions suggested that she was actually one of Tenebra’s principal investors, and that the true fortune she owned was so vast that even all the funds she had sunk into the Queen’s foolish errands were but a drop in the bucket for the old lady. Other rumors claimed that the old goblin had, in fact, played an instrumental part in raising the affably evil girl, as her godmother or a nanny or maybe just a friend. Of course, all of this was hearsay.

	There was only one thing that was certain: to this day, Xae’vex was one of a very select few that Tenebra spoke to and treated with the utmost respect, bordering on loving care. 

	“I know,” Günter sighed. “But I can’t help it! I’ve never felt like this before. I just can’t stop looking at Queen Tenebra! She’s so beautiful!” he said, sighing again. 

	“Oh, she’s quite fetching, certainly. And with that wild personality of hers, it’s no surprise that she’d steal the heart of someone as naïve and innocent as you as easily as a spider’s web ensnares a moth. Hmmm…” the old woman hummed, scratching her wrinkled chin thoughtfully. 

	“What is it?”

	“It goes without saying that you aren’t exactly her type. Or perhaps – men like you are actually more suited for her than even she realizes?” she giggled quietly at the thought.

	“No way. She’d never be interested in a guy like me. I mean, look at me! I’m not exactly the kind of person that she takes up to her bedchambers at night,” the kobold said. “And if I can’t even get that, then what chance do I have of wooing her?”

	“Hmmm! You ask good questions, young man! Kekekekeke!” the old woman cackled at the joke only she understood. 

	“What’s so funny?”

	“What do you offer a woman who has an excess of everything except the most important thing? Kekekeke!”

	“I don’t get it…”

	“Keke! You’re still too young! You’ll figure it out some day.” She let those words sink in, then interrupted the kobold’s confused thoughts. “In the meantime, ask yourself: if you feel so uncertain about her, is staying here really the best thing to do? Perhaps going out and getting experience in the world, meeting women like her and finding out what makes them tick, maybe that would do you better!” the old woman said, rocking back and forth with curious liveliness for her age. 

	“That’s true, but I don’t want anyone other than her. And I don’t want to leave. What if something happens while I’m gone?” Günter asked, his tail coiling around to rest in his open hands. He stroked and played with it idly. 

	“Then it happens. There’s not much you could do about it even if you are here. Use your brain, you nincompoop! Do you really intend to stick around this half-assed operation for your entire life?”

	“No, no, of course not,” he said, but his tone remained uncertain. “But I’m…”

	“Afraid? Because of what happened the last time you went out into the big, brave world?” she rasped, the words hitting close to home. He had spent most of his childhood reading about the epics of heroes, the stories of adventure and romance and tragedy and comedy. He had taught himself to brawl and swing a sword from an early age, his goal from the start to escape the lonely dark tunnels his people called home. 

	The day Günter became an adult, he struck out from his home to explore and enjoy the great big world outside. However, despite all of his effort and talents at fighting, he struggled to find work – nobody trusted a little kobold to hunt monsters or guard cities. He eventually began to starve on the streets of a certain dirty metropolis, only for some extravagantly dressed woman to find him laying in the garbage of an alleyway and drag him back to her castle. 

	She had him fed, clothed, and cared for by her employees as he recovered to full health, but apart from the moment she stood over his emaciated, delirious form, a grimace on her strikingly beautiful face, she had never even looked his direction. That is, until he screwed up, not so long ago. 

	“No! I’m just scared of losing what I have. This place is fun. It’s friendly. We get great pay and benefits. And… she’s here. How many kobolds can say they’ve got a gig this nice?” he asked, scratching some dirt off of the tip of his tail. 

	“It’s a fine profession and Tenebra is a marvelous employer, but you could be so much more. I’ve got an eye for talent, young man. You’ve got the chops to go far, but not like this, not in this business. It was your dream, was it not? If you were the type to really be satisfied with a comfortable life, you wouldn’t have left your home to begin with,” she said. 

	She stopped rocking, leaning forward and staring the kobold in the eyes. He looked up, and saw that – though age had worn away the rest of her body – her radiant crimson irises were still sharp, still gorgeous. “Think about it, Günter. Think on it carefully. I can only suggest what I think you should do; I cannot do anything for you. I do enjoy our talks, though, and I admit, it would be lonely to see you leave.”

	He nodded, no further words coming to mind. An awkward silence settled in, only for one of the crows to instinctively sing to fill the void, “Murrrderrr!” And the rest began to chime in, their unusual reticence over. Any further conversation became unfeasible.
 
	The bronzed kobold shook his head with a sigh and stood up. “I should go. I hope they saved me some supper,” he yelled over the noise, and she nodded back to him. He waved goodbye before heading off to the kitchens to scrounge up some grub. The elderly goblin returned to rocking at a steady rhythm, taken by thoughts of her past. 
	



	Günter set the bowl of cold gruel down on the table, along with the stale half-loaf of bread he was given to go with it. The castle’s kitchen staff was surprisingly excellent due to Tenebra’s picky standards when it came to cuisine. Unfortunately, if one failed to arrive on time, they would only have basic foodstuffs left. The kobold did like chatting with the colorful chefs and assistants, though. They were a real blast. 

	The kitchen was one of the few places where an undead was employed; Tenebra always found the usual fare too stupid, too bloodthirsty, or too stinky to make good servants. However, she made an exception for a certain rude and cranky skeleton with a heart of gold, who currently worked as her head chef.  He had been a career cook during his life, and after being raised by a rookie necromancer who failed to bind him to his service, he went right back to perfecting his craft. He spent a few hundred years bouncing from city to city, learning and mastering as many new styles of cuisine as he could find. The minor limitation of having no tongue with which to taste his creations was no obstacle for his burning passion.

	The cave-dwelling reptilian spooned up some of the thick, lumpy, pale goo and bit down over it. As expected, it was nowhere near as bad as it looked. That chef could work wonders with even the most mysterious of food items. The kobold did not particularly desire to know what was actually in it, though. Even though he knew it would have been much tastier if it was warm, he found himself content with the dish. The stale bread, however, was simply stale bread. He broke pieces off of it and dipped them into the gruel to soften them up and flavor them. It was alright. 

	“Well, if it isn’t my old friend, Günter!” said Wik’wik, wrapping his arm around the lonely reptile and ruining his quiet moment to himself. “Just the ‘bold I was looking for! Ya see, I got saddled with an awful job because of you, but I deserve much better than to be stuck as a glorified seamstress for your mistakes, so ye’ll take care of the dress for me, right?” he asked. 

	The kobold stared at his food for a few moments, before silently nodding. The goblin let go of him and tossed the dazzling red dress on top of the pint-sized dragonkin, trotting away with a wicked laugh. Günter just let it fall onto the ground – he was going to have to wash it anyways, so in the meantime he would just eat his fill. 




	“Mistress.”

	“I’m rather in the mood for ‘your excellency’ this evening, Francis,” the freshly-bathed and still quite nude woman said, carefully organizing her jewelry. She placed the priceless black pearl ring back in its slot, then she slowly shut the lid of the decorative box and set it back into its place on her dresser. 

	“Ah. Your Excellency, then. You have guests. They appear to be lizardfolk sellswords. They wish to speak with you, to offer their services. I shall just go ahead and remind you that as of right now we only have enough loose funds to cover the counterfeit gold doubloons you wished to commission, and hiring them will almost certainly put us over budget,” the orc said, looking right at her, but purely out of respect and not lechery. He was simply no longer impressed by her admittedly alluring form, having seen it exposed and coupling with unspeakable horrors far more often than he would have liked. 

	“Did they look competent?” Tenebra asked, throwing the doors of one of her many closets open to peer at her clothing options thoughtfully. “Did they mention any particular specialty? Or why they came here?”

	“They appeared hardened to my eyes. The captain of the guard did say he could sense a warrior’s spirit from them, whatever that means. They said that they were hunters, and that they are nomads passing through the region on their way to one of their ancestral mating grounds, where tribes of females would be awaiting them. They apparently would like to earn as much money as possible, to impress the females and improve their chances against their rival male tribes.”

	“Fascinating!” the Dark Queen said out of the corner of her mouth. Her foot tapped on the ground impatiently, a frown appearing on her face. “No, no no no! None of this will do! Tribals? I need some sort of barbaric uniform, something that commands respect and fear! A fur bustier – tiger pelt! Leopard skin loincloth? I’ll have to match the patterns, both must be either tiger or leopard. An ivory crown! Or a circlet? Yes, a circlet of finest ivory! Iron anklets and vambraces as well! And a necklace of savage animal teeth. Lions, tigers, and bears, oh my! Yes, I need this immediately. Francis!”

	“Your excellency, we cannot prepare an entirely new outfit that meets your specifications so quickly. It would be rude to keep the lizardfolk waiting for more than an hour at the most,” he said. 

	“Oh, drat. You’re right, as always. Unfortunately, that leaves me with nothing fitting to adorn myself with for our guests. Do you have any ideas?” the dark-haired woman asked, folding her arms together and sighing. 

	“I believe that they would suit your tastes, your excellency,” Francis said, looking at his clipboard and scribbling something snarky down as a note to himself for later. 

	“My tastes?”

	“Yes, your predisposition towards certain sexual partners. I believe that you would find them alluring in the same way as you do most exotic creatures.”

	“Oh! They’re like that, hm? Tell me, what do they look like?” Tenebra asked as she picked up a half-finished magical scroll and placed it in one of her trunks full of works-in-progress for later. Francis took a deep breath, well-accustomed to memorizing all of the pertinent details of a creature’s physique and appearance and describing them to his mistress. 

	“They are taller than the average-“

	“No no, wait, don’t tell me, I feel like being surprised! Ah, I’ll go seductive casual for this,” she said, grabbing a short silken robe and throwing it around her shoulders, tying the waist closed. 

	The sleeves hung almost past her hands, while the skirt barely reached her knees. It was embroidered with a beautiful gold-and-red dragon that snaked from one sleeve, circled around her back, and ended on the other. The eastern-style robe was deliberately designed so that, even when tied shut, most of the wearer’s chest was exposed in a v. Tenebra had hers fitted so that it would cover precisely half of her bust and leave the rest in plain sight. It was loose enough, though, that it was entirely possible for a mere shift of her position to cause one or both of her breasts to hang at an angle where her nipples would be showing. For her purposes, this was a feature, not a flaw. 

	With her features still soft and damp from the bath, the robe served as an ideal choice to torture any hero, monster, or heroic monster with hints of what lay between her tender thighs and what the rest of her curvy bosom looked like. She walked over to an ornate chair and sat down in it, facing the entrance of her bedchamber. She crossed her legs tightly and draped one of her arms over the back of the chair, glancing down and adjusting one of the sides of her robes to cover up an exposed nipple. Even Francis felt pangs of warmth in his groin at the sight, and was once again reminded of just how alluring his mistress could be even to him, who was hardened to her wiles. 

	“Francis? Send them in.” The orc nodded.

	“Do you desire any particular toys for this, Your Excellency?”

	“Hmm. No, not this time. Oh, and I’ve grown tired of that, call me ‘Your Grace.’”

	“Yes, Your Grace,” he said. He bowed deeply and glided out of the room with all of the poise of a master butler. 

	
	

	A few minutes later, there was a knock at the door. “Your Grace, I have returned with the guests.” Tenebra cleared her throat, slicked her hair back, and put a subtle yet confident smile on her face. 

	“You may enter.” The beautiful wooden double doors flew open, and Francis stood to the side, holding his arm up politely as a gesture to indicate for the newcomers to enter. Tenebra was not disappointed. Five tall humanoid and reptilian creatures walked into the cozy, fashionable chamber, glancing around calmly. They were several inches taller than the average human, and lean muscle covered their elegant frames, like gazelles. 

	Every inch of them was covered in scales, not hard and lustrous like those of a dragon, but soft and matte like those of a lizard. All five of them had beautiful, colorful stripes all over their chests, tails, and faces; mixtures of blue, black, grey, and yellow. While they shared the same colors, the thickness, number, and direction of the stripes varied between them, creating different patterns and shapes. One had grey diamonds running down his chest, while another had blue octagons dotting the length of his tail. 

	To Tenebra’s surprise, all five of the strangers wore very little in the way of attire. They wore leather bandoliers with various tools and trinkets and colorful feathers on them, mostly decorative in nature, and… that was it. Of course, as they were not mammals, their gribbly bits were well-hidden, but even kobolds wore more clothing than this. She did not mind.

	“Your Highness,” the one standing closest to her said, bowing his head slightly. His slitted yellow eyes peered at her with the same cold expression that a snake would have, conspicuously traveling over her body and lingering on her bare legs. “I am K’vett, leader of the K’vettan tribe of the Bupharan race. My people and I have come to seek work from the ruler of this land. We are experienced hunters of animals, monsters, and people. We can bring your enemies to you, live or dead,” he said, his sharp carnivorous teeth slightly visible as he moved his mouth. 

	“Well met, K’vett. Please, don’t be too ceremonial, we are in private and I am not a snobbish queen,” the dark-haired woman said, holding out her hand. The lizardman kneeled before her, took her hand, and gently kissed the back of it with his coarse, scaly lips. She smiled a little wider. “Tell me more about your tribe, and your kind. Do all Bupharans dress so lightly?”

	The lizardmen all let out a small, raspy chuckle. They were clearly asked that often. “No, Your Highness. Those of us who live in colder climates wear what you would expect for warmth. However, the southern tribes feel that the only reason to wear clothes is when one has something to hide. To wear no clothes is a sign of trust and respect towards those you visit and speak with.”

	“Then I am honored by your nudity,” Tenebra said, her expression stoic but giggling to herself on the inside. “I believe my aide mentioned that you are a tribe of all males, correct?” 

	“Yes. Our species chooses to keep both sexes separate all year every year except for a single month, the one between spring and summer. This is called the Union. During that month, we migrate to our ancient mating lands and reunite into a far larger congregation. Feasts and orgies are thrown every day. The male tribes display their strength and superiority by wrestling with one another as well as comparing their coinpurses obtained over the course of the year in an attempt to attract mates.”

	“Very interesting. And what do the women do?” she asked, pretending to be oblivious to the other four lizardmen undressing her with their eyes. 

	“Females enjoy all of the pleasures that the males can give them before deciding on one whose children they will bear. They possess great power in our society, for they may choose who among the many whose seed will take, so the right to reproduce is solely in their hands. Still, it is rare for a woman of our species to leave the Union unfertilized, but if they are unimpressed by every single male who attempts to court them, it is possible.”

	“Wait, Bupharan women can have sex with countless men and choose who impregnates them?” Tenebra asked, suddenly very curious.
 
	“Yes. Their physiology is much different from that of humans. Anyways, once a woman has chosen who will be the father of her child, the father gives her all of the money he has. The women return to their tribes and leave. They bear the children, and, if it is a boy, they return the child to the male tribe at the next Union to be raised by men. If it is a girl, they keep it and raise it themselves. This is the system our species made, as we do not have the concept of romantic ‘love’. Ultimately, we simply desire to procreate. Now you can see why we need the money,” K’vett said, folding his arms. 

	“Hmmm, yes, I can,” the Dark Queen said, uncrossing her legs only to cross them the other way, enjoying the way the five strong warriors’ eyes followed the movement religiously. “Well, there is a certain herd of dire cattle that has been terrorizing trade routes to and from one of the towns of this region. All of the teams I’ve sent to round them up have come back licking their wounds. If you could capture the herd and deliver them back to the stupid wizard rancher who made them, I would pay you handsomely for saving me the trouble.”

	“Dire cattle?”

	“Mmmmyes. They are cattle who have grown to a ridiculous size in a poorly-thought out attempt to create more meat per cow slaughtered. Unfortunately the experiment also made them somewhat more intelligent, and they figured out that they hate humanoids, so they attack anything with two legs and two arms on sight. Also, they’ve learned to speak! But they are not a peaceful sort. If you are backed into a corner by them, you may slay them to defend yourself, but I trust you will not waste the meat.”

	“Of course, our kind appreciates the hunt and the hunted above all else. We will accept this job, but we expect a fair payment for it,” the tall lizardman said. “That is, at least three hundred gold crowns.” Tenebra glanced at Francis, who showed her a series of numbers with his fingers and elaborate hand signals developed from years of on-the-fly negotiations. She pursed her lips.

	“Well, I cannot pay you in full at the moment, but at the end of the month I will have the spare funds to do so. I can give an advance payment, as proof of the deal’s veracity,” she said. She looked back up at the orc assistant, and he nodded. Bolstered by his approval, the Venerable (or as Francis would say, Venereal) Villainess leaned back in her seat. Her secret weapon was unleashed in the form of a nipple slipping out from behind the robe. The lizardfolk did not react in any significant way. 

	Instead, K’vett looked to his companions and they whispered in a tongue unknown to the queen. For once, their attention was completely off of her, and it irked her something fierce. Here she was, exposing parts of her delectable body that people would sell their souls to despoil, and they dared to ignore it?

	Finally, the colorful lizardman turned back to her and shook his head. “We will accept an advance, but it must be at least one hundred crowns. We do not wish to be swindled.” Francis shook his head vehemently towards Tenebra and showed her seven fingers.

	“I apologize, but the best we can afford at the moment would be seventy crowns. We are willing to add an additional thirty to the total as a show of good faith,” she said to the lizards, glancing back at Francis in the door way slamming his palm into his face and shaking his head. He held up the seven fingers again and then one digit, and Tenebra blanched when she realized he had meant seven crowns, not seventy. She quietly gulped as the lizards considered the offer.

	“We are not certain about this proposal,” the leader said finally. “We do not know you, nor do we have any reason to trust you. In fact, we have heard the rumors about how poor your management of funds is. We hoped that they were only rumors. Do you have any evidence to refute them?”

	Tenebra glared at the lizardman for a moment. She was in too deep to pull back now. She had to commit or else she would look like a fool, and she had been made a fool of twice that day. It would not occur a third time. She could come up with an extra sixty-three crowns if she needed to, but now the deal was not a matter of convenience, but rather, personal pride. The Dark Queen quietly stood up, her gaze fierce. Without a word, her hand went to the knot around her waist, loosening it and pulling it apart. Her robe fell open, and with one smooth movement, she grabbed it and swung it off of her shoulders. She tossed it away with all of the dramatic flair of someone who practiced that precise move solely in order to look cool when taking off a coat.

	The delicate adornment fluttered to the ground, leaving only the nude villainess behind, and the shocked look of five lizardmen. “If you are worldly enough to barter a deal, then you are worldly enough to understand what it means for someone of my species to do something like this. Look at me! I am naked, am I not? I am like you, now, equal before the gaze of all! Is this not enough to prove my trustworthiness? Hmm?”

	The reptilian folk did not seem to know what to think, until their eyes drifted downward.  Then what they were thinking became readily apparent due to certain appendages beginning to stir and emerge from their natural hiding places in their crotches. This time, it was Tenebra’s turn to stare at their bodies. Not one, but two shafts expanded out from each of their slits, one above the other. They were fascinating shades of pink and purple, covered in fleshy barbs that swelled along with the rest of the members. The lizardfolk did not attempt to cover up their natural reaction.

	“Oh! Err… how bold,” she said, surprised at how quickly her guests’ attitude could change. She was, however, quite pleasantly surprised by the sight of the exotic appendages. Their hemipenes were thinner than the average man’s penis, yet the long barbs would give them an interesting effect that, she had to admit, she was curious to try. They were something fresh and exciting, and she was already trying to puzzle out the optimal way to sample them.

	“I must apologize for this,” said K’vett. “The women of our race usually do wear clothes at all times. It is… quite provocative to reveal yourself like that. It is close to a declaration that you are… in season.”

	“Oh,” Tenebra muttered. While she was not intending to get them horny with that little stunt, it did serve her means quite well. “Well, human women are always in season,” she said with a meaningful smile, flirting almost on reflex.  

	“Yes, it is an… interesting difference between our species. But we should conclude our deal before our discussion diverges into other territory,” the squamatan man said. “While it had some unintentional side-effects, I believe your act of good will does indicate you are worthy of trust. We will accept an advance of seventy crowns and capture the cattle, but we will expect our full payment by the end of the month.”

	“Deal,” Tenebra said, marching up to the leader and grabbing his hand and shaking it firmly. At least that was over with. “Now, I believe we were discussing differences between our species? Perhaps we can examine them more… in-depth. In a hands-on manner?” she said, fluttering her lush eyelashes at the noble warrior. 

	The not-so-subtle proposition did not fly past him. A feral grin spread across his face. “You may be interested to know is that there is something of a… fetish amongst my people for women of the mammalian races. It is very deep-seated.”

	“Ooh. Now that sounds like a fun topic. I’d love to hear about that!” she said.

	“You might be surprised to hear that many of my kind are heavily aroused by the idea that a female does not have the power to control if and by whom she is impregnated. The fact that you are so warm compared to our females does not help the matter.”

	“Warm to the touch?” the Kruel Kaiser asked, reaching up and placing her hand on his chest, feeling the sinewy muscle beneath his scales. He felt strong. K’vett shivered slightly, both of his manhoods throbbing upwards. The reaction was not lost on her. “And our softness, our curves are unimportant?”

	“Softness is irrelevant to the breeding quality of a woman. Our race desires strength in our partners, and the only sexual characteristics we prefer are hips and thighs,” the leader said, remarkably well-spoken for the sensations he must have been feeling. The Dark Queen smiled and slid her hand over his abdomen sensually, feeling each abdominal muscle group, hard and tight. The way he squirmed in place with every touch she gave him made her core feel funny, the telltale electricity of arousal developing. She was clearly the one in control, and she loved being the one in control. 

	“So you like strong women?” Tenebra asked. They were starting to speak her language. The other four lizardmen began to encircle her, and she glanced around at them with a predatory smirk developing on her lips. All this attention was starting to get her hot and bothered. She could feel the blood rushing to her cheeks and her loins. She put her free hand on her hip and leaned on one leg, using the pose to spread her thighs apart ever-so-slightly. The four around her eyed her hips and rear hungrily, slowly inching closer towards her. 

	The Rakish Ruler moved her fingertips down K’vett’s pelvis, teasing that sensitive region just enough to make his dual dicks jerk upwards again. At the same time, she could feel the dampness building between her legs. A healthy flush on her face, she sent her fingers searching lower, finally brushing over the lizardman’s upper shaft. The barbs were thin, soft, and malleable to the touch, but the purple rod was hard beneath them. The tall creature grunted, standing firm in place, apparently content to let her direct the proceedings. 

	“Our women decide when to mate, with whom to mate, and how to mate. While males attempt to attract mates, we have no power in the actual realm of sex. Men are the true prey, and women are the hunters. You will hunt us?” he asked. Her hand wrapped around his upper penis, and she began to rhythmically stroke over it, her fingers brushing against and between the barbs. She felt the blood pumping through the appendage with his every heartbeat – she felt it twitch powerfully against her soft hand, and looked down at it to see the precum building at the tip. The Dark Queen glanced up at him and gave him a coquettish smile. 

	“Oh yes, I’ll hunt you. All of you,” she said, scooping up the pre with her index finger and lifting it to her lips to lap it up. The flavor was lightly bitter, unsurprising for a race of carnivores. She was quite used to it due to the multitude of monstrous lovers she had taken, most of whom were nothing but meat-eaters. All five of the lizardmen tensed up for an instant at the sight, and she made another sweep of her eyes around to see all of them, showing them her confident smile. “Are there any particularly fun, sexy customs for your race that I should know of?” she asked.

	The lizardman standing to her left spoke. “U’thenc.” The others all echoed the word, and K’vett chuckled and explained it for the mystified queen. 

	“U’thenc is an ancient, hallowed rite in which a female dons a blindfold, and accepts all comers. She does not judge those who mate with her on their strength or wealth, but on how well they sate her lusts. The best lover will have his child born. It is a rare, but beloved event, and the women who perform it are given a small percentage of every participating male’s funds in exchange.” 

	“Sounds like my kind of ritual,” Tenebra said in a husky tone, stretching her lithe arms out above her head and taking a deep breath. “Francis? I need a blindfold.”

	


	The Dark Queen walked over to her wooden work table, which was covered in various magical instruments, sweeping the clutter aside with her arm. She climbed onto it and beckoned at the horny lizardmen with a smile. They crowded around her, and she lifted up the blue silk cloth Francis had given her moments ago, displaying it for all five to see. She folded it four layers thick and tied it over her eyes, finding it more than sufficient to render her blind. She was no stranger to blindfolds and sensory deprivation, but she still found it a significant turn-on.

	“Are you certain you wish to engage with all of us at once? Our members are designed so that we can mate with multiple women in rapid succession. Using both of them on a single female seems… indulgent,” one of them said in a shrill voice, but she could not tell which one it was.

	“I rather think that this is one of those times that you should indulge yourself,” Tenebra said, laying back with a deep breath. Her head hung just off of the surface, while her pelvis was situated at the other edge of the table. She heard the lizardmen chatting in their native language, presumably about who would go first. The decision was made quickly, and the dark-haired woman heard them walking around her. One oriented themselves just beside her face, while she felt something slick and hot brush against her thigh. She giggled and slowly spread her legs wide, demonstrating her impressive flexibility. 

	She was well aware of how wet she was, and felt a pang of smug satisfaction when the lizardman standing there let out a husky growl, presumably at the sight of her moist slit. A second later, a grin spread across her face when the sensation of the exotic cock rubbing against her entrance spread through her body. It was nice, but she had no need for foreplay. “Well? Are you gonna fuck me or wha-“ she said, her voice cracking into a meep as she felt him penetrate slowly but forcefully. 

	It traveled inwards smoothly thanks to its size, yet the barbs pressed against her walls on all sides, casting the illusion that it was much bigger, which she had fully expected. She had not, however, expected that the barbs were long enough to brush over her outer folds as they bent back on the way in. Every half inch of length meant another sharp jolt of pleasure as her clit was pressed against by a prong. The lizardman had his entire shaft buried inside her within a handful of seconds, and she was already forced to chew on her lip to prevent letting out a raunchy moan. She could feel his other penis resting on the pale flesh above her womanhood. 

	The unknown Bupharan grunted with pleasure from the queen’s warm and wet passage, breathing heavily through his nostrils. Her swollen vulva twitched appreciatively around the hot thing inside of her. He pulled his hips back, and slowly extracted himself to the tip. To Tenebra’s relief, the fleshy thorns did not touch her clitoris very roughly on the way out. That relief was short-lived, as the next thrust came almost immediately, and this time she was unable to stop herself from emitting a lusty gasp – the barbs were doing a profound job of stimulating her button.  She felt weak with excitement, and let her head drop and hang off of the table, her face upside-down. 

	The lizards all hissed out low chuckles at her reaction, and the villainess was about to say something snarky when a pointy, musky thing pressed against her lips. She could hardly stay mad with the wonderful pleasure she was feeling, so she planted a smooch on the tip of the appendage. Spurred on by that, the one standing there slowly pushed his hips forward, and she opened her lips to let him slide his pronged length into her mouth, while the lizardman on the other end of her gave another pump into her wet hole, beginning to develop a rhythm. 

	It tasted quite mild, to her surprise. She ran her tongue all over and around the barbed cock in swirls, instantly earning a low groan from the lucky lizard. He reflexively tried to push more of himself in her mouth, and she allowed it, feeling its tip tickle the back of her throat. The angle was optimal for deepthroating, and with one more careful push, he was in to the hilt and she had him in her throat. The Dark Queen began to suck on the member gently as he slowly pumped in and out, making his leg twitch and drool drip onto her face from above. 

	Both of the Bupharans maintained their leisurely pace for a while. Tenebra was somewhat disappointed by how gentle and polite they were being – if she so much as moaned around the dick in her throat, its owner would pull it out to her lips just in case she was actually having trouble. Even though her tight passage was squeezing around the lizard’s shaft down there, and he was grunting hard and even panting with need, he continued to torment both her and himself with slow sex. It felt splendid, but she was not going to peak unless they began to be rougher with her. It dawned on her how deeply these strong warriors were subservient to females, that even in this situation they would treat her like a delicate flower rather than ravaging her like wolves. 

	The villainess’s thoughts were interrupted by a loud groan from the lizardman deep-throating her and the sudden pulsing of his cock in her throat. She braced to swallow the incoming load, only for the colorful, pokey shaft to be yanked right out from between her lips. Hot, thick fluid splattered across her torso, running down her soft skin, and a few specks landed on her face. She panted loudly, her chest rising and falling with each breath. 

	She was about to speak up and give the lizards a piece of her mind for being so damn soft on her when the other Bupharan’s breaths became shallow and he pushed himself all the way in, his member spasming. After a few seconds, the throbs subsided, and he pulled out of her. She could feel his thick seed dribbling out of her passage, tickling down her crack. At least that one had enough balls to blow his load inside her, she thought. 

	“Listen, that was nice and all, but I was hoping you folk would be a little more assertive,” Tenebra said. “I mean, I’d gladly take control normally, but this whole blindfold thing was your idea.”

	“Hmm? That was just a warm-up,” replied one of the voices around her. “Do not be concerned. We simply wanted to ensure you were ready, as you are not of our kind and we cannot be certain you can handle it.”

	“Ready? For what? What is ‘it’?” she asked, hearing one of them walking around to her lower half. There was no answer, and she almost reached up to lift the blindfold when she felt a scaly finger rubbing around her labia in circles. It was nice, and she paused to enjoy it when the finger slid down to her other hole, bringing copious fluids with it. She inhaled sharply and bit down on one of her knuckles, moaning lightly as she felt it press inside, lubricating it well. Now they had her attention. 

	Moments later, Tenebra felt two hard tips brush over both of her holes at once, and realized what the unknown lizardman intended to do. Then she felt the dicks probing inwards. By now, she was well-lubricated, and she felt the barbs rubbing over her clitoris again as her cunt and ass were penetrated simultaneously. The mysterious Bupharan forced every inch of both his tools into her, already much more active than both of the previous partners combined, much to her delight. 

	“Oh, yes! Gods, yes!” The villainess said with a gasp. The two dicks at once felt like they were filling her up so tight,  pressing against each other with only the thin wall between her holes to keep them from touching. Immediately the reptilian warrior pulled his hips back and slammed them back against her, the force creating a soft smack of flesh against scales. He proceeded to hump her hard and fast, making little wet schlups with each powerful thrust into her depths. 

	All of the built-up arousal from before suddenly returned, and Tenebra was panting and moaning passionately within minutes. She grabbed her breasts and massaged them, occasionally pinching a nipple as her body bounced forward again and again and again. Her thighs reflexively squeezed around the strong waist of the lizardman, her legs locked around his back, and this only appeared to heighten his ferocity. 

	He jackhammered her mercilessly, leaning over her now, with his hands planted firmly beside her chest – she felt speckles of drool dripping onto her stomach, and briefly wondered if their species was known for salivating a lot while breeding. That irrelevant thought was soon banished by the heat of their fucking, a kind of pleasure she could barely handle anymore. Lovely sensations built and stacked with every bestial movement he made into her, making her squirm and sweat and even drool, herself. They threatened to overwhelm her, to burn her mind away in searing bliss, and the final straw came when he lifted her lower body off of the table, holding her by her hips and pulling her against him as he bucked into her with insatiable lust. 

	The proud and mighty Dark Queen erupted in climax, letting out a prolonged, sultry moan as she tightened and twitched around the rutting lizardman. As if on command, the sinewy muscles all over him tensed up, his tail curled up behind him, and he growled deeply. He came, pumping both of his loads deep inside her at the same time. Their mutual orgasms amplified each other, and seemed to last for an eternity before the warrior slowly lowered her hips back to the table and stumbled away. 

	“H-holy crap…” Tenebra moaned after she finally came down from her ecstasy. 

	“That was the pinnacle of indulgence for our kind. Anal sex is a waste of valuable seed that could be inside another female, as is using both of our penises at the same time. Females of our race are usually very critical of such things, but you have definitely given that fellow a rare treasure,” said one of the voices around her, deep but friendly. 

	“It was pretty good for me, too. I hope he’s not the only one who wants to do that?” she asked.

	“Not all of us share his rather, er, esoteric tastes, but I believe at least one more would be glad to engage in that sort of thing with you,” the deep voice said. 

	“Wonderful! And what would you like?” the Premier of Pallor asked as she sat up and tried to steady her shaky legs. 

	“Well…”

	Francis had seen enough. He sincerely doubted his mistress would require his services anytime soon, and drawing doodles of fine lizardman asses could only keep him entertained for so long.  If she did need him, she could just send a telepathic message to him using one of the many spells she had laid upon the castle. If not, then he might as well just go get some sleep or free up some of the capital the queen would need to cover the advance payment to the lizardfolk. The last thing he heard echoing from the chamber as he shut the doors was, “Unf! Mmmm!”



	
	
	Günter held the cleaned and mended dress above his head as he climbed the stairs of the mistress’s tower, so that it would not drag on the dirty stone floor. He had taken care of the matter personally, of course, thanks to his experience in washing and repairing clothing during his fleeting days as an adventurer. However, the careful and precise work of sewing the strap of the dress back together in such a way that it would not leave evidence of it ever having been damaged in the first place was certainly tricky. If it had been any other part of the dress, he would have had no chance of success. 

	About halfway up the tower, he passed by a nude, somewhat grumpy-looking lizardman who was on his way down for some reason. The kobold briefly wondered who he was and what his business was with the mistress, and one possibility asserted itself that he promptly ignored. He increased his pace on instinct, trying to work off the nervous feeling in his gut. 

	After finally reaching the top of the unreasonably tall tower (that Lady Tenebra herself had demanded be added to the castle solely because evil castles always have giant towers as a part of them), he walked to the huge double doors and his sharp ears picked up the telltale sounds of coitus. Slurps, moans, grunts, and some sort of dirty words being exchanged. His heart sank to the bottom of his chest. 

	It was not as if he did not know that she had sex with all sorts. Rather, he had deliberately avoided thinking about it specifically because it was painful to consider. And he had certainly never heard or seen it first-hand before. He looked around, hoping to see a grumpy Francis who he could pass the dress off on, but no such conveniences existed. He swallowed and reached out to slowly push one of the doors open. It swung with a loud creak, alerting the occupants of the room to his presence, though none of them cared enough to look. 

	He saw his crush on her knees, blindfolded, her head bobbing back and forth on a barbed dick belonging to a tall lizardman. She stroked off the accompanying lower dick with her hands. At the same time, three other lizardmen were standing beside her, jerking themselves off with hungry, depraved looks in their eyes. The queen had semen all over her face, chest, back, and thighs, a certain clue as to how long she had been going at it with the group. 

	The kobold blinked and averted his gaze, wishing he could avert his hearing, too. The queen was incredibly sexy, and he could not deny it, but he also could not bear to see her like that. He knew it was selfish and that she had the right to intercourse with anyone she wanted, and she had no prior engagements – certainly not with him. But he could not control his heart any more than a dwarf could choose not to grow a beard. 

	That was when the Bupharan (as kobolds were familiar with most species of reptilians) being sucked off hissed, his tongue flicking out as his dual shafts throbbed visibly, the lower one spurting more white stuff all over the voluptuous villainess’s neck, while the upper one had its bulges travel directly into her mouth. Her throat pulsed as she swallowed down each gout of seed, and then, when the ejaculation had subsided, she popped off of the hemipenis, breathing heavily. A satisfied smile spread across her face. 

	Günter had to break his stare away again for his own sanity, looking around the room for some place he could drop the dress and then flee. He settled for the nearby fancy chair, tossing the priceless red silk outfit over the back of the chair. He turned to bolt out of the room, but something caught his eye, causing him to pause. On an old bookcase against the wall, there was a certain book…

	“Back so soon? I guess you hope I’ll forgive you?” Tenebra said in the kobold’s direction, and he froze, slowly panning to face her. She still had the blindfold on, but was clearly speaking to him. The lizardmen chuckled under their breath, something she seemed to ignore. “Well, that’s fine. Who’s next?” she asked, leaning forward and bracing herself on her hands and knees, slowly swinging her semen-soaked rump left to right seductively. Nobody made a move. The lizardmen all looked at each other with various expressions of disbelief and shrugs.

	“Don’t tell me you’re all done already?” The lizardmen slowly turned to face the kobold, whose eyes were locked on his mistress’s bust that jiggled slightly with her movements. He realized they were looking at him and was slightly startled, looking at them in surprise. One of his bigger cousins silently held his hands out towards the Dark Queen, giving Günter a look. The kobold’s eyes widened and he shook his head vehemently. 

	“Fine! Then I give you another chance to prove yourself, whatever-your-name-is! Try not to disappoint me so badly this time!” the villainess said, spinning herself around so that her rear was facing the kobold. He got an eyeful of her delectable rump, and found himself wiping drool from his chin. He gulped and waged a fierce internal struggle between his morals, his depression, his crush, and his basic needs. Kobolds were never really known for their willpower, though. Moments later he found himself approaching her. As he came near, the lizardmen nodded approvingly, and somehow that made him feel a little better.  

	Günter, like all minions under Tenebra’s employ, was required to maintain a dress code even while off duty, even though kobolds did not need clothing per se. His fancy shirt and breeches and boots all came off at the speed of light, his own hemipenes already brandished for all to see. The Bupharan blinked in surprise at the sight of it. 

	It was unusual even for kobolds and reptilians – rather than having two separate penises, his hemipenes were fused together into a single penis, though still with two urethras. And it appeared that he had also just been generally lucky in his endowments. In other words, his dick was huge for a kobold. And even for a human, it was pretty big. He was considerably thicker and a bit longer than any single appendage of the quintuplet of Bupharans. However, his barbs were much smaller, more like bumps than prongs.

	He grabbed his mistress’s ass to stop her sensual swaying. Butterflies fluttered in his stomach at the same time that the electricity in his loins denied him all higher order thought. His fingers squeezed around her pert bum, fascinated by the feeling, his heartbeat quickening as he realized that this was all really happening. She, on the other hand, noticed that his hands were somewhat smaller than what she remembered, but did not think too much of it. She was blindfolded, she could have just misremembered.

	His manhood brushed up against her hot vulva, and the Dark Queen seemed to pause in confusion, only for Günter to ram it in with a splurch. She moaned, her thighs shaking against the ground as he, with no sense of self-control remaining, humped away at her. Little grunts and groans escaped him as he felt her labia twitch around his girth, her walls warm, slick, and tight. He groped her ass desperately, his cock throbbing from the unbearable sensations coursing through his body. 

	Though her confusion had not been cleared up in the slightest, it was hard for Tenebra to complain about the current situation. Whoever was doing her currently was scratching an itch that the others had been unable to, a deeper, fuller sense of excitement coming from within her passage. As he thrust into her folds wantonly, she noted that his pelvis seemed smaller than what she remembered as well. But it did not add up: if his hands and body were smaller, how could his column be bigger? 

	Of course, it was quite difficult to focus on that, as he was screwing her with similar fervor as when she had been double penetrated the first time. Hard, rough, and fast, the hot column of flesh inside her was stirring up pleasure in the way only larger insertions could, a phenomenal sensation of gooeyness spreading from her core. 

	Despite how incredible it felt, despite all of the emotion he was saddled with, the bronze kobold tried to fight past it out of the primal desire to satisfy the beautiful, sexy woman gasping and writhing before him. The Bupharans watched this with amusement in their eyes, all four of them masturbating as per the customs of their race. 

	Günter found himself staring at and drooling right onto his mistress’s ass, his animal lust for the (relatively) huge bum that he was slamming himself against building more and more. He fondled it as hard as he could, leaving red marks behind from the force with which he kneaded the taut flesh. This only heightened his boss’s pleasure, no stranger to heavy groping. 

	He spent several more minutes struggling to hold back his raw urges, but before he knew it, he had already reached his limit. His tail curled up behind him, and something burning hot shot out of his dick and flowed deep inside her. His heart fluttered for a moment, his mouth hanging open as he moaned. The dark-haired woman also moaned, but she did not climax – he had not quite pushed her over the edge. 

	After the ecstasy of his orgasm faded, it was replaced with that same bestial lust as before almost instantly. With nothing else to do, he simply started swinging himself into her again, catching Tenebra off-guard. Though physically, he was exhausted, he still put everything he had into every thrust. Tenebra, who had no chance to recover, found herself being pushed to the brink in a matter of seconds. 

	Günter’s fatigue made sustaining his pace unfeasible. He was strong and fit, but sex with a human was something else. He bent over the mistress, resting his head on her back and reaching forward to grab onto her tits. She gave a raunchy moan as he played with the soft mounds, much softer than her rear, and his fingers brushed over her hard nipples. He squeezed and pinched them between his knuckles, making her grunt with pleasure. He continued to rail her from behind, his tongue flicking out to run over her pallid skin, tasting her passionately.

	Within a few minutes, general fatigue and the sheer pleasure she was experiencing caused her arms to give out. Her face fell into the lush carpet, still bouncing forward and back from the force of Günter’s bucks. “Mmmm, ah, oh!” she moaned weakly. “D-don’t stop! More!” she cried, starting to shake her hips back against him as well, trying to get the most out of every single hump he gave her. Her begging drove his manly instincts wild, and he summoned a reserve of energy he was not aware he had, fucking her even harder with echoing schlups. 

	It was her turn to attempt to stave off impending climax, and she succeeded for a while. Eventually, though, the cruel pleasure that Günter inflicted on her overwhelmed her entirely. She gasped and her lips quivered, eyes closed to savor the feelings as much as she could. Her body shook as her folds clamped down on the kobold’s girth, in turn pushing his pleasure to untold horizons as he continued to buck into her. With his goal fulfilled, his remaining will to struggle faded away, and he pulsed and throbbed inside of her again, semen spilling from her stuffed passage. 

	The kobold's tail slowly lowered and he relaxed over her body, his hands roaming all over her and feeling her soft curves sensually. He passionately kissed and licked her back, letting out small grunts as the residual spasms of her passage worked over his softening column. Both were left panting and exhausted beyond compare. Eventually, the bronze one got up and pulled off of her, falling on his rear, still half-delirious from the pleasure, looking at the hot woman he had savagely claimed and already feeling his cock starting to stiffen again just from the sight of her.

	The lizardmen took that chance to cum, grunting and shooting their seed all over Tenebra after she rolled onto her back, trying to recover from the profound ordeal the kobold had given her. The warm fluid was thick and musky, tingling on her flesh as she panted weakly. Millions of tiny testaments to her incredible lust and allure swam around on her breasts, stomach, thighs, and deep inside of her, giving her the smoothest, loveliest afterglow. She writhed and moaned on the ground, running her hands over her sex-soaked body, feeling truly complete.

	Günter was the first one to get enough oxygen to his brain to realize what he had just done, and he hopped up, gathered his clothes, and sprinted out of the room, quietly shutting the door behind him just as Tenebra sat up. She pulled the blindfold off and peered around the room with a giddy smile on her face. Then, she realized there were only four others in the room, and asked them if they were the ones who had done that. They shook their heads. The Dark Queen frowned, standing up and looking around. Her bedchambers were a mess now, but she had to admit, it was all totally worth it. The only issue in her mind was: who, exactly, was that, at the end there?

	Her eyes scanned the trashed room and settled on the one truly suspicious object - her red dress, fully restored.



	 “Send him in,” the Royal Recidivist said, filing her nails to the optimal length for being fashionable but also avoiding the issue of them impeding her work. The double doors flung open, and Francis pushed a small warty goblin into the room, who nervously fidgeted and avoided looking the mistress in the eyes.

	“Wik’wik, do you know why I called you in here today?” Tenebra asked. She was wearing a fancy dark blue tunic with no leggings, her legs crossed in her favorite chair. The goblin’s eyes lingered on the pale, smooth flesh of her thighs before he realized she was watching him stare and shifted back and forth nervously. 

	“’cuz I’ve been doin’ a good job and you wanna reward me personally?” he suggested, his tone sounding hopeful but not very optimistic. 

	“No, Wik’wik, you are here because you were assigned the duty of repairing my red dress I wore during the confrontation with the adventurers yesterday. And it is here, repaired flawlessly. Except it only got here while I was having sex with some guests of the castle,” she explained. “And somebody, presumably the person who left it here, got his dick wet using me. Not that I mind, it was wonderful, but I’d like to know who it was, so that I know who to call up to my chambers when I’m feeling lonely.” 

	Wik’wik pondered what she was saying for a moment, then made a snap decision. He threw himself down, bowing and begging and pleading for forgiveness. “I’m sah sorry, mistress! I couldn’t help meself! You’re too beautiful for any mortal to resist! Please, have mercy!”

	The dark-haired woman smiled, though her eyes lacked any hint of cheer. “Well, then, Wik’wik, if you would be so kind as to strip so that I may pay you back for the pleasure you inflicted on me? With my mouth, of course.”

	The goblin had his clothes off before the word ‘pleasure’ left her lips. She was impressed by his haste, and then saw his naked body, and burst out laughing. It was a deep, raucous laugh. She was genuinely amused. The goblin, however, was less so.

	“W-what’s wrong?” Wik’wik stuttered, glancing down with a frown. 

	“Sorry, but that’s definitely not the thing that was inside me last night,” she said in between bouts of silly giggling. He was average-sized for a goblin, which was about average-sized for a kobold, which was quite small by human standards. The little green guy’s lips quivered and water built up in the corners of his eyes, experiencing utter humiliation on a scale that no man deserved to experience. Tenebra swallowed back her mirth as best she could, not intending to hurt the poor goblin like that, but it was difficult to help it. 

	“Ahahaha, ah, um, sorry about that, Wik’wik. You may go now.” He left practically in tears, and Francis shot his boss a questioning glance. “Oh come on, you weren’t there! It’s really funny!” she said, though she did feel awful on some level about what she did to the lad. “Um, give him a week of paid vacation.” Francis nodded and marked that down on his clipboard. 

	Wik’wik, in the meanwhile, had decided he would definitely not tell them that he had forced fixing the dress onto someone else. That runt Günter had been up to some dirty stuff and the last thing he was gonna do would be to let him become the mistress’s new favorite fucktoy. Instead, he was gonna blackmail the shit out of that dragon-lover and exploit it for all it was worth.

	Tenebra had already moved on to her Plan B. She had hoped that interview would work, but suspected it very well could not for any number of reasons. She would not allow that to stymie her pursuit of the truth. For her next trick, she’d be using an old favorite spell to look into the past from an objective angle. It would take a while to prepare and cast, which is why it was not her first choice, but it would work for certain.




	For a whole day, Günter was uncertain how to handle the experience. He had totally banged his crush, boss, and probably one of the most beautiful women in the world. On the one hand, he felt great on a molecular level. On the other hand, he felt terrible for hiding his identity. He carefully watched Francis and Tenebra as they went about their daily activities, spying for any signs that they might have been on to him. To his surprise, Tenebra looked in his direction and locked eyes with him once. That was unusual. Uncanny, in fact. 

	Wik’wik was the only one who knew the truth, and he was abusing it every opportunity he got. Günter was forced to perform all of the goblin’s chores around the castle, lest the secret be revealed and all manner of terrible consequences unleashed. At the end of the first day, the kobold was utterly exhausted from all of the extra work. 

	The next day, the kobold was carrying a basket of apples down the hallway when he overheard Tenebra arguing with Francis very, very fiercely in one of the side rooms. She appeared to be losing, judging by the shrill pitch of her tone. He wanted to eavesdrop, but feared being discovered and instead trotted away. 

	Later that day, he went to the aviary to visit Granny Xae’vex, opening the door only to find the Dark Queen herself sitting in there across from the elderly goblin. The villainess glanced at Günter and they locked eyes for the second time in as many days, sending a chill down his spine. She raised a questioning eyebrow, and he slowly shut the door. He waited by the door for a while until he heard the pair’s muffled voices speaking again, but then felt guilty for trying to eavesdrop, and left.

	It was not long until he decided he would tell them everything. Partly to rid himself of the guilt, and partly to rid himself of Wik’wik. Either way, it was for the best. He stepped into his shared bedchamber and his roommate, Newthorne the red kobold, was talking with none other than Sir Francis himself. Francis held up his hand to silence Newthorne, then nodded towards the door. He left the room, a miserable frown on his face, looking at Günter and shaking his head on the way out. Francis turned to the bronze kobold.

	“Günter. You have been terminated from the employment of Tenebra the Dark Queen, the Malignant Monarch, the Terror of Temptation, the Gothic Goddess, the… so on and so forth. You have a week to gather your belongings and make your goodbyes before you will be forced to leave the castle. You will receive full pay such that you have earned, but I am afraid you have not been with us long enough to qualify for a pension. You have the right to request transportation to the nearest town or city. Do you have any questions?”

	The kobold’s jaw dropped. He could only think of one query: “May I know, um, why I’ve been fired?”

	“You breached the clause in your contract that states you may not engage in untoward or otherwise lewd acts with your employer, Mistress Tenebra the Ruler of Bleakstone Pinnacle, Consort of Shadows, Lady of Ash and Fire, Ruler-in-Exile, et cetera et cetera et cetera, unless she consents to such activity explicitly and with a witness present. While she did seem to give consent at the time, she had confused you for another individual, and so her consent is invalid by law.”

	“Ah,” Günter said, lowering his gaze to stare at the ground. 

	“For what it is worth, the mistress was quite torn up about this, but decided that she is a queen before she is a woman, and she cannot play favorites if she wishes for the rule of law to be valid,” Francis said. “I tried to tell her that it really did not matter, she has intercourse under far more dubious circumstances all the time, but she would not hear it. I’m sorry, Günter,” the orc said, patting him on the back sympathetically. 

	“It’s alr- it’s- it’s fine. She’s right,” the kobold said, his chest hollow and his throat sore all of a sudden. 

	“Listen, if you need anything, come talk to me, alright? I have many contacts. I can refer you to a good employer in the city or any town or village you want in the land,” he said. The devastated kobold nodded. Francis was always the voice of reason. The orc sighed, then walked out of the room. 




	His last week at the castle was sluggish and melancholy. All of his friends tried to cheer him up, but it was hard to lift his spirits. Granny Xae’vex gave him a long lecture about the road less traveled, but it fell on deaf ears. Even Francis kept an eye on him, making sure he was keeping it together. 

	Günter appreciated it, he really did, but he could not fight his heart. The week eventually passed, and on that lonely day, he stepped out of the castle gate, watching it close behind him. He hefted his knapsack over his shoulder, wearing only the rags he had arrived there with. He had some basic travel rations, a bag of gold coins, and the clothes on his back. He looked at the bright sun in the sky, partly obscured by some clouds, and took a deep breath. 

	He stepped forward, beginning his next journey. 




	Only to be interrupted by a familiar voice calling out behind him. “Waaaait! Wait wait wait!” she shouted, running as fast as she could to catch up with him. Her normally well-kempt ebony hair blew chaotically around her face with the cool breeze, and her loose black cocktail dress was clearly not meant for such activity. She finally reached him, panting heavily from the exertion. “Wait, just… wait!” she gasped out. 

	Günter looked down at the queen, utterly perplexed. He had never seen her like this before. She was always so calm, cool, and collected. He didn’t even know she could do more than walk at a brisk pace. She looked up at him, finally catching her breath. “Günter, I’m sorry I almost missed you. I was rushing to finish up some things. They took me all week to craft and I only barely did it in time!” 

	She snapped her fingers, and a small, straight sword in a leather scabbard materialized out of thin air, hovering in place. She grabbed it and handed it to him, and he drew it out, finding it to be a beautiful and ornate jian with mystical runes inscribed in the steel of the blade. A red ribbon was tied about the hilt, and it was long enough to flutter in the breeze. He turned the sword around in awe, amazed by its quality.

	“It’s a masterwork I acquired from a traveling merchant a few years ago. I’d always intended to give it to somebody as a gift. I invoked wards against rust and erosion on it, and imbued the steel with a general-purpose durability enchantment to prevent dulling or damage in combat. And there’s one more little feature I gave it, consider it a reflection of your… well, it’s powerful, anyways. If you will it to happen, it will fire a lightning bolt from the tip of the blade that can melt through steel armor, no problem.” 

	“Uh, thank you a lot!” Günter said, simultaneously baffled and amazed. “But what did you mean by ‘reflection?’”

	“Well… it can shoot twice every six hours. Think of that what you will,” the woman said, cracking a small, devious smile. The kobold glanced around, wondering if he had been caught in some sort of illusion magic. “Oh, that’s not all. Have this,” the Dark Queen said, leaning over to lock a tiny mithral chain necklace around the kobold’s neck, her hair blowing in his face. He could smell her sweet scent – tempting, yet forbidden, like ambrosia. Her cheek brushed against his, and a gooey warmth filled his stomach. She stood back up and pointed to his collar, where he saw that the necklace had a small red garnet pendant on it. 

	“Keep that on you at all times. Do not sell it, even if you get hard up for money. It’s a good luck charm. Though I recommend you hide it under your clothes so that you don’t get thieves after you for it,” Tenebra explained, clearly enjoying herself. It was bizarre, Günter realized, as if she was always pretending to be someone she was not, and she was suddenly being herself now. 

	“I really don’t know what to say,” the bronze kobold said, shaking his head in disbelief. 

	“But wait! There’s more!” she grinned, and she snapped her fingers again to summon a different object. The kobold’s eyes widened in recognition of the Tome of True Glory, one of the rarest and most valuable texts in the entire world. Only four were known to remain, all of them impossible to reproduce as the words they held were enchanted so that none could write them after reading them. It was a compendium of legends, myths, and epic adventures from millenia past, the single greatest repository of knowledge for heroic, anti-heroic, and villainous deeds. It was an unmatched treasure for those who loved such things, like Günter. That was why he was so distracted when he saw it on one of her bookshelves.

	“I’m going to let you borrow this for a while,” she said quite simply.

	“You’re kidding! How did you even – what – how did you know I was interested in that?” 

	“A sorceress has her methods, Günter. Always remember that. Anyways, if you lose this or it gets damaged at all, you are going to owe me your life unless you can get me another copy of it. Are we clear?” He was heavily intimidated, but this was not an opportunity he could pass up. He nodded.

	“Why do you have one of these, though?” he asked. She paused, surprised by the question and unsure of how to answer. 

	“Um, I love these sorts of things, really,” she admitted. “They’re so much fun, aren’t they?”

	The kobold suddenly felt a strange connection with the Dark Queen. “Yeah! Stories like the Bufehgilung, epics like the Naravartisatja, they’re so exciting, aren’t they? The hero, Friedrich, struggling to earn the right to live as a man after being cursed with a half-bear form! The villain, Prajut the Cruel, who sacrifices the lives of thousands to bring back his loved ones, who is eventually defeated and slain by a crippled child!”

	The villainess’s face lit up in recognition and excitement. “I love both of those things! True classics, even if they were rather simple plotwise. Say, have you read the Montriad Saga?”

	“Yeah, but it’s not my favorite. I thought the supporting cast was too bland, and the main character couldn’t carry the whole story on his own.”

	“Indeed! But it has my fourth-favorite villain of all time in it!”

	“She was pretty great, yeah, but I think she suffered a lot from not having adversaries as great as she was.”

	“I can certainly sympathize with her,” Tenebra sighed in good humor. A moment of awkward silence passed where neither of them knew what to say next, and they both looked at various things on the ground or in the sky. “Well! Anyways, this is yours now, keep it safe,” she said, handing the gilded book over to the kobold, who carefully slipped it into his knapsack. Günter took a deep breath, feeling like he was on top of the world.

	“I’d… I’d better get going,” he said, his own words killing his mood harshly. He turned to start walking down the road, only for something wet and warm and soft to brush over his cheek. It was a kiss. He slowly turned to look at the queen in surprise. 

	“That was for the sex,” Tenebra said, smiling broadly, her cheeks flushed red. “You know, it’s quite lonely as an adventurer. You can feel free to come back at any time. There’s always room in my bed for one more kobold.” She winked at him, and his heart palpitated. 

	“What about in your heart, missy? Eh? Eh?” Granny Xae’vex said, having snuck up on the both of them. They both jumped in place, the shared moment ruined. “What, did you think I’d let you leave without giving me a goodbye, mister?” the old goblin yelled at the kobold, thwacking him in the ankle with her cane and knocking him down to the ground. “Nincompoop!”

	He climbed back to his feet and bashfully hugged the old goblin, who hugged him back tightly. “Bye, Granny,” he said.

	“Oh, I’ll miss you, youngling. Just don’t get yourself killed, you hear? And write letters!” she demanded as they broke away. 

	“I’ll try my best,” the kobold shrugged. With his new sword on his belt, fresh reading material in his satchel, a precious pendant, and a pleasant new memory of Tenebra, he turned around and set off, waving goodbye to the pair. After he was out of earshot, the old goblin spoke up.

	“Sorry Tenny, seeing that kid on his way makes me miss the old life. I’m so gonna blow this popsicle stand,” she said, turning to hobble back towards the castle. 

	“Whaaat?” the dark-haired woman called after her. 

	“Turns out I used up all my fortune financing you anyways. I’ve got a potion of vampirism in my room for just such an occasion! I’m gonna regain my youth and become an adventurer again! Kekekekekeke!”

	“Whaaaaaaat?!” Tenebra screamed, running after the old goblin who was moving strangely quickly for her age. 

	“And I’m gonna jump that kobold’s bones big time! I bet he won’t even recognize me when I’m young and pretty again! They called me a shortstack in my prime, you know! Kekekekeke!”

	Tenebra gave up on chasing her and sighed. She could in no way stop the old lady from doing what she wanted. She owed her too much for that. She looked up at the sun, then straightened her hair out with her fingers as best she could, summoning her composure and putting the mask back on as effortlessly as one would don an article of clothing. Now she was the Dark Queen again, and she had far too much business to do to worry about a crazy, pervy old goblin who could definitely handle herself. 

	She strode through the gates of her castle, a confident smile spreading across her lips. She walked through the vast courtyard, looking at all of the lush greenery cultivated by her minions. She nodded respectfully towards the lumbering gelatinous cube that had a pair of spectacles floating around inside its membrane as it slowly oozed towards the library about as quickly as a snail. She nodded to the black chitinous beetle-man, her captain of the guard, who was flexing his wings as he instructed some goblins and kobolds on how to fight with a spear. She saw Francis arguing with a traveling merchant over the prices of some exotic fruits. 

	Suppressing a chuckle, she pushed open the doors and stepped into the grand hall, the throne room of her fortress. She stepped down the beautiful velvet rug that stretched from the entrance to the steps of the throne, walked up the stairs, spun, and sat down upon the seat of the crown, staring out over her domain with nobility and royalty emanating from her beautiful frame.



	And then something warm and wet splashed over her hair, dribbling down her face, and she slowly looked up to see an overgrown crow sitting on the rafters above her.