Seeding Midnight 1-4 review

>I personally like/dislike this story because:
I liked this portion of the story. I enjoyed the worm’s eye view of Drow society, and the author has definitely added those small touches to make it more believable; the patterns of red and purple, the slave-masks, the strange alien-ness of Drow sexuality. I’m enjoying these 4 parts as an erotic guide to the dark city.

>The objectively good things about this story are:
As above; the descriptions and detail taken into Drow Society. The sex scenes were vivid and descriptive, and definitely erotic. JAW has definitely taken his time to make the debauched culture seem rich and varied, and I like how he is using that as a vehicle for sex.

>The objective problems with this story are:
The main character, at least so far. The main character is honestly rather boring, and I think JAW missed some opportunities for good character development and skipped over to more porn. In these first 4 parts, hard to gauge the MC’s emotions or feelings, other than that he needs to escape and his forced lust. The scenario hes in provides a rich opportunity for exploring his emotions, and it doesn’t appear to have been taken advantage of. The character seems hurried from sexy set-piece to sexy set-piece, without time to explore whats going on inside him or how he reacts to it.

>The characters of this story are good/bad because:
Other than Relan, they are decent. Not exceptional, however. The Matron is a good example of the hedonistic, debauched Drow elite, and I like that she’s genuinely cruel, manipulative, cunning and sexy. While we havent explored much of her character, the story is mostly from Relan’s perspective, so we really only see the side of her that she shows her captive. Which is fine, and a really nice touch. Thrali is ok, not spectacular. Theres little going on for her, but I assume theres a lot more down the line. As of now, however, she seems to be bland and a forced ‘true love’ for Relan.

>The plot of this story is good/bad because:
I liked the plot so far. It works as it relies on Relan’s perspective as the lowest rung in Drow hierarchy, exploring the strange and erotic world of the Drow from a familiar view. There hasn’t been a whole lot, but I definitely am interested in his escape attempts and how they will change as he grows more comfortable with his new life.

>The sex scenes in this story are good/bad because:
They’re a mixed bag. They all have solid, evocative imagery and are very erotic. I especially enjoyed the half-orc gladiator submitting. Other than the two gladiatorial scenes however, the rest of the sex was very brief. I would have enjoyed them more if they lasted longer, especially the first time he gets to bed the Matron. 

>I would like to see more/less of:
Refraining from this because theres a lot more of Seeding Midnight, so I should read that before I say this.

>I like/dislike the author's writing style because:
I like it because its simple and concise, its clear whats going on when and whos doing it. JAW can write something very erotic and sensual with very few words, and that is a talent I hope extends to the rest of SM.

>I would personally rate the story, from 1 (unreadable) to 5 (incredible):
4, very enjoyable but some flaws that prevent it from being perfect.

>How can the author improve?
Refraining from this as well until I read all of SM.

I wasnt sure where to put this, but you capitalize a lot of words that dont need it; favorite, virgin, etc. It seems to be a running thing through all four parts I read, so it is something you could (if you havent already) work on

Seeding Midnight Review 5-End
Sorry I’m not writing out all the Drow names, too many Z’s to remember

>I personally like this story because:
 	I ended up liking the latter portion of this story more than the other. All the characters have much more development and the sex is longer, sexier and carries more narrative weight. The whirlwind tour of the Dark City’s byzantine structure remained, but the story became more than an erotic slideshow.

>The objectively good things about this story are:
 	What the first four chapters had remained; Drow society was vivid and rich, the sex descriptive and clear, the story oozing with eroticism. These chapters feature much more character development, and the BDSM parts were, to one who dislikes that stuff, tasteful and arousing without stepping into full on torture. 

>The objective problems with this story are:
	The last few chapters; eight, 9-a and 9-b were very scarce on the smut. Were this  a story intended solely as a narrative it would be fine. But, considering that the point of this story is to arouse me, it is worth noting that nothing in these three chapters, which are by and large the longest of the series, was arousing, sexy or erotic. These chapters are fine in a narrative sense, and featured some excellent character development, but for those looking to get off, don’t expect anything from these parts. 

>The characters of this story are good/bad because:
	All the characters improve with these chapters. Relan is not as boring as the first four parts, and I liked that the Part V started with some deep character introspection and exploring Relan’s emotions. He’s still not great, however. It may simply be that he’s uninteresting, he really doesn’t have any defining character traits or features that stand out, aside from being skilled and caring, which arent enough to be distinctive. I feel that he is intended to allow readers to self-insert, which is alright, but I would have enjoyed the story more if it’s lead was is own character. That being said, I did like the ongoing motif of him struggling to maintain his identity as a person versus his encroaching identity as a slave. It was very well done and is best part of Relan.
	The Matron really steals the show in these chapters, however. I especially enjoyed her impatience in Part V’s sex scene with her daughter, as well as her violent overreactions. Especially in Part V, she is extremely arousing, a dominant and commanding sexy villain who gets what she wants. Her violent overreactions, her casual use of sex and BDSM, how she herself works as a caricature of Drow society, all of it works perfectly.
	Izzara is, perhaps fittingly, less enjoyable than her mother. At first she seems a little clichéd, the withdrawn, virginal youth who craves the main character’s cock. She improves, however, and I especially liked how she used the Drow female-dominance thing as a tool, but kept it from being a part of herself. However, she seems to submissive and weak to be a Drow raised in the same society as her mother. The story does take notice of this, but she seemed less a Drow and more a dark-skinned girl who happened to pop out of her villainous mother’s bottom. Why is she so appalled at seeing her mother hurt? The message I was getting from the whole story is that Drow love to hurt each other, she even scratches Relan during sex for pleasure.
	Thralia remains sort of empty, the romance between her and Relan just appearing. But as they escape together and their relationship is explored, I started to like her more. How she would always volunteer for the harder tasks, clearly a result of her slave life, things like that made her more interesting. I would say she improves from parts 1-4, but doesn’t become anything stellar.
	The Drider character I liked as well, especially the rhymes.

>The plot of this story is good because:
	Its good because it builds up the inevitable climactic escape from the Dark City, then it erupts hastily before I anticipated it, a nice touch. The story of this was very good, but one part of it sticks out to me.
	The cut from the Drider’s web to the Matron’s court. That shocked me, and I thought it was a dream or hallucination. I struggled to believe that the guards could have found Relan and Thralia in rough terrain, captured them, returned to the city, informed The Matron of their capture AND assemble all the Drow to witness their torture BEFORE the Driders, who can scale hard surfaces easily, could make it there. And JAW never touched on how they were re-captured and the details relating to that, I felt like a whole chapter had been skipped over. 
	But that is the downer. I liked the rest of the plot very much.
	 	
>The sex scenes in this story are good/bad because:
 	They were improved drastically, and were very enjoyable. Compared to what appeared in parts 1-4 they were longer and more enjoyable. Thralia’s scene at the beginning of part V, as well as The Matron’s in the same part, were all very erotic and enjoyable, mostly due to JAW’s detailed and effective imagery. The epilogue’s threesome was very nice and well, a nice consensual threesome at odds with the hardcore BDSM before it.
	
>I would like to see more/less of:
 	The Matron, honestly. I would have liked to see more of her, both in terms of sex, and as a character. While we only get to see her as a villain, I would have enjoyed more of her politicking and sleeping around the Dark City, as well as longer sex scenes with her. The few she takes part in are brief, and were they given the same attention as the other sex scenes I would have liked this much more.
	
>I like/dislike the author's writing style because:
	JAW’s writing style remains very good. He does not mince words, and what I said in the review of 1-4 also goes for this.

>I would personally rate the story, from 1 (unreadable) to 5 (incredible):
	5, and it deserves it. I enjoyed the plot enough to read through the three long sexless chapters, and the payoff in the epilogue was well worth it. The sex was arousing and made someone who dislikes BDSM like the genre in this case.
 
>How can the author improve?
Again the capitalization thing. Lots of words are capitalized that do not need to be. Some hiccups in word choice: ‘He ran his hands delicately over her delicate breast’ being the most awkward.