http://www.asstr.org/~srb
Don't read if under 18 or illegal in your little corner of the world, like you'll listen. This 
should appear only on my site http://www.asstr.org/files/Authors/srb/www/ F3, Futanari 
Palace, and basically should be wherever Pal's stuff is. Also at the Grey Archive, and 
some other places they might end up, they know who they are. Any websites that want to 
host my story must have expressed written consent to do so. I will list all websites that I 
have granted permission to list my stories there. If you are reading this now and find this 
on a new website, then please email me at somerandombastard (at) yahoo (dot) com

This is copyright me, so don't call it yours. Feedback can be left here. I created all the 
characters, they are all fictional, and any relevance to anyone living or dead, is incidental. 

So here's a new one folks, this is different than most of my stuff. If it offends you, well 
it's kind of supposed to. So don't get too hung up on it. Don't know where this came out 
of really, just sort of woke up and wrote it in four or five hours, and edited it tonight. It 
could be a series, but I'm kinda hoping it isn't, I don't feel like another whole long series 
right now. But you can't control what stories you write sometimes. Enjoy, leave 
comments if you feel the need to.

One last note, I came up with the note from the color, not the mellow yellow song. The 
title will be the last reference.



(I'm Just Crazy About) Saffron
Chapter 2
Sleeping with Saffron


"So, wait a minute, to add the fractions," Saffron said, furling her brow. "I have to find 
the uh."

"The least common denominator, good," I encouraged, pointing to the number under the 
line in the fraction.

"So if it's three fourths, plus one half, then I make the one half two fourths, and then add 
them?" she said, writing down five fourths next to it.

"Good, good, but before you're done, you have to change this into a whole number," I 
pointed at the five over the four.

"Oh, right, so it's…one and one fourth?" she asked, scribbling it down next to her 
previous answer.

"Yeah, good job," I said with a smile.

"Okay, then Sally needs one and one fourth cups of water to make the cookies!" Saffron 
smiled. She caught on quick.

"Good evening William," my father said as he entered the door. 

"Hey dad," I said, standing up. He gave me a hug, hoisting me up in his arms with a 
smile on his face.

"And who are you charming today?" he asked, with that knowing and joyous voice.

"Hello Mister Adams," Saffron said, curtseying for my father.

"Oh I should have known, we're blessed by the presence of the beautiful little Saffron. 
Well my little man has always gone for the smartest and the cutest, hasn't he? Teaching 
her differential equations yet?" he said, putting me back down.

"No, not yet dad, just fractions," I said, waving towards the paper.

"I hate math," Saffron said, rolling her eyes.

"Well don't worry too much, you only have three more years, and you won't have to 
worry about taking any more math courses again. Unless you want to," dad said with a 
knowing smile. Any girl could opt to take math courses, but only a couple did. Cooking 
class counted for a math credit, and no girl wanted to have to do equations while she 
could bake a pie.

"As if," Saffron shook her head, then added quickly, "Sir."

"So how are your parents?" dad asked, removing the coat of his suit. He loosened his red 
tie and took it off. While he was the chairman of the city council, he had to dress 
professionally. But when he was home, the expensive suit came off, and he just wanted to 
play with my brothers and sister, and be with mom.

"They're well, thank you sir. My papa's still waiting for his raise, we're hoping to have a 
little brother soon," Saffron said. She had wanted a younger brother for some time now.

"Well we're trying to change the rules around a bit, at least I am. The mayor is being a 
pain in my keister about it. I want the rules to allow for low income families to have two 
children, provided they can support them. Most of the larger cities have already adopted 
the same laws, but it's all being caught up in committee," my dad said, before giving it 
up. He hated talking about work at home. He tried to just leave work at work. But it was 
an important bill he was working on, and I was happy for him that he was close to getting 
it done. A family like Saffron's should have a chance to have two children, and especially 
without a boy to carry the family name. I just hoped that they would pass it into law, so 
that she could have that baby brother that she always wanted.

"I hope so sir, my parents say hello," Saffron nodded. 

"Well tell them I said hello back, and thank them for allowing us to enjoy your presence," 
dad said.

"Will? Will can you, oh hello dear," my mother said, craning around the corner. She 
walked over to my father, planting a kiss on his lips. Dad wrapped his hand around her 
dress, holding her close to his body.

"Hello beautiful, dinner ready?" he asked rhetorically.

"Of course, I was just going to ask Will to call everyone in to wash up," mom answered.

"They out back playing baseball?" dad asked.

"Where else would they be on a beautiful day like this?" she smiled, looking into the 
back yard.

"Wonder what they're doing without their all star second baseman," he said, nodding to 
me. "I'll get them coming in. Smells delicious.  Will, wash your hands and help your 
mother set the table," dad ordered, and I hopped to it in a moment. Saffron hopped up to 
the sink next to me and washed her hands too, before helping me set the table. 

Because of my father's job, we had a large family. It wasn't always that way though, my 
oldest brother Robbie was eighteen, and then after him it took my father four years to 
make enough to have my next oldest brother, Scotty, who was fourteen. After that it only 
took two years for my older brother Robert who was twelve, and another two for me, at 
ten. Then of course there's Jim and Jeff, my two little brothers, only a year apart at seven 
and eight.

Then there was my sister. Well she wasn't my sister really, as she was adopted. Her 
parents had come from the Far East, and had died in a car crash. She had no family, and 
nowhere to go, and was abandoned in a foreign land. She was just a baby at the time, and 
it was sad really. So when she went up at the auction house, really a meat market but for 
children, my parents adopted her. Mom always wanted a baby girl, but my dad was 
blessed with super seed. So while they waited to get the paperwork done to authorize 
another childbirth, they adopted Lin Mai. Adoption papers are easier than having 
children, but you still have to make the money to support it. That's why Saffron's parents 
couldn't adopt a boy, because they couldn't save the money up to buy one outright, and 
take care. Boys were much more expensive than girls.

Me, my six brothers, one sister, both parents and Saffron. So ten plates, ten forks, spoons, 
knives, napkins, and glasses of water and milk, well mom had a small glass of wine and 
dad a light beer. It was easier than it seemed really. I could smell the mouth-watering 
turkey aroma wafting in from the next room. I didn't realize how hungry I was until mom 
placed the turkey on the center of the room. I just wish dad had already cut it already. I 
could hear the commotion as my brothers came in, bustling with activity and happiness 
after the end of their game.

"Alright boys, let's get going," dad said, carrying Lin in on his arms. He was always the 
nicest to her, always trying to make sure that she felt like one of the family. He set her 
down at the table on my right side, with Saffron on my left. I smiled at her, and Lin 
smiled back, it was nice to see her happy. I did what I could to be nice to her, but it was 
hard, she was usually very reserved. At least she talked to me, unlike Jeff and Jim, who 
pestered her nonstop. I know that she likes me, trust me on that.  One time I had to teach 
Jeff and Jim a lesson about her…

"Robbie, why don't you cut the turkey today? I'll be in the dining room in one moment," 
dad said from the other room, helping mom bring in the side dishes.

"Bon appetite," Robbie said, cutting the turkey. It looked delicious, nice and juicy. At 
least him cutting the turkey saved us all some time. We still had to wait for dad to come 
in.

When he finally sat down, we ate. The turkey was absolutely demolished in a matter of 
minutes, being stripped to the bone. The ten of us tore through an entire twenty pound 
turkey, a pot of mashed potatoes, a pound of roasted carrots, and a baker's dozen of rolls. 
There wasn't any conversation beyond asking for food dishes, just the sound of food 
being eaten and silverware scraping on plates. Dinnertime was eating time, we just didn't 
socialize during meals, but who did? We had all day to be together.

"Oh," my dad said, putting his hands on his stomach, the same way he did every night. 
"That was good."

We all said some variation of thanks to my mom, who just smiled. We all knew how 
important it was to show our appreciation for a meal cooked, especially to our mother. 
She wasn't just doing her job, she was doing it exceptionally well.

"Alright boys, why don't you clear the table?" my father suggested. Not every family 
cleaned the table off, technically we didn't have to do it. But my father knew how 
difficult it could be with such a large family, and all it took was a little bit by everyone to 
make mom's life easier.

I watched Saffron stand up and move over to my mom, curtseying in front of her and 
thanking her. It was those little things that made me like her so. The little niceties, the 
politeness, just the way in general that she wanted to do something that she didn't have 
to. 

"Well Saffron, are we going to enjoy your company all night long?" I heard mom ask. 

"I would love to spend the night here, Missus Rhea," Saffron replied.

"Do you need to go to your house to get anything?" mom asked.

"Yes ma'am, may I be excused to go get it?" she asked.

"Of course, William, please be a proper gentleman and escort her home and back," mom 
said. My eyes grew wide, I had never had a girl sleep over before. And it was going to be 
Saffron! This was going to be awesome!

"Sure thing mom. We'll be back in no time," I said, stepping up from the table. I brought 
the plate out, scraping the food bits off before handing it to Scotty, whose turn it was to 
do the dishes. I jumped into my shoes, I didn't have to undo the laces to get my feet in 
and out of them, and rejoined Saffron, who was carefully doing the laces on her shoes.

"If I may?" I said, offering my elbow.

"Yes sir," she giggled, taking it as we walked out the door. I was beaming, walking down 
the sidewalk with my Saffron on my arm. And I was going to share my bed with her! 
This was going to be great!

"Would you mind waiting here?" Saffron asked me as we approached the first step of her 
house.

"Uh, sure, I guess, why?" I asked, wondering if there was something wrong.

"Nothing, I just want to surprise you, that's all," she said, smiling sweetly as she 
unhooked from my arm.

"Sure," I said, grinning like a fool. I waited outside for a bit. Nervous didn't begin to 
explain how I felt, but I told her I'd wait out here. A man has to keep his word, especially 
to a woman. Otherwise, what good was a man? And what good could he do for his 
woman? Oh wow, look at me here, thinking about Saffron as my woman, that's so silly. 
Maybe, one day, a long while from now. I don't even think you could apply for a 
marriage permit without graduating school anyway. Besides, the tests to get married were 
supposed to be really hard, especially for teenagers. Nope, I'd have to wait a while to 
even think about asking Saffron to, well…look at me, asking myself questions like this. 
God, I'm only ten.

"Thanks for waiting," she said, carrying a small piece of luggage.

"What's in there?" I asked, taking it from her hand.

"The surprise, silly," she whispered in my ear. 

"Oh, well, let's get back in, it's getting dark," I said, carrying her suitcase.

"Can, we watch the sunset?" she asked. She always liked watching the sunset. Personally 
it wasn't that interesting, but it WAS romantic…

"Of course, let me just bring this inside," I said, leading her back to the house.

"Hurry up," she said, grabbing my hand and tugging as she ran.

"Hey, hey!" I said, trying to keep up. She was quicker than me, but the luggage was 
slowing me down and making it awkward to run. 

"Come on! You don't want to get beaten by a girl, do you?" she said, teasing me. 

"So that's how you want to play it?" I yelled at her. I yanked her arm back, sending her 
flying to me. I picked upper up in my arms, cradled under the luggage. I wasn't as fast as 
her, but I was much stronger, and that was the way I liked it. I grinned and kissed her. I 
was getting better at that. At least that's what I could tell from the dopey grin on her face.

"No, I'd rather play it like this," she said, idly dangling her feet back and forth happily. 
She was strange sometimes, but I loved her carefree attitude. I carried her out to the front 
yard, where dad was drinking a cup of coffee and playing catch with Robbie. He's good, 
he's got a scholarship lined up to play quarterback. He might even make the pros one 
day! 

"And he gets the pass off," my father said as the ball was cutting through the air in a 
perfect spiral. He stretched his arms out to catch the ball. "Touch down!"

"Nice one," I said, completely unconscious about carrying Saffron in my arms, despite 
the looks.

"Can I help you two?" my dad asked.

"Uh, no thanks, we're good, sir," she said, dangling her feet.

"How about this," my dad said, prying the suitcase from my fingers. "I'll just put this in 
your room, alright?"

"Oh, yeah, thanks dad," I said with a chuckle. 

"All right Robbie, Knute Rockne called this the 'forward pass'" Dad said, chucking the 
football towards him. I was off in such a hurry I didn't even see whether or not Robbie 
caught it. Looking back I'm sure he did.

I carried Saffron up to my tree. Well it wasn't really mine, but it was the tree that I used 
to play on all the time growing up. It wasn't just a tree though. It was more like a 
playhouse for me. More importantly, there was my clubhouse, which was raised about six 
feet up. It was mine as long as I could keep Jim and Jeff out of it, a pain usually.

"Come on," I said, hoisting her up. Her arms reached up at the steps as she pulled herself 
up. She couldn't quite make it, so I tried to brace her feet, but she kicked me square in the 
nose crawling up. I was reeling, clutching my nose, and expecting some blood loss. But it 
was just an innocuous kick. 

"Come on you're going to miss it!" I looked up to see her giggling about it with her hand 
over her mouth, laughing as I rubbed my sore nose.

I grunted and climbed up quickly. I took a seat next to the wall at the window to watch 
the bright yellow ball in the sky go down. I liked having something to lean against. So 
did Saffron, but she liked leaning against me.

"Where does it go?" she asked. It was a little naïve, but she was still eight after all. She 
wasn't really learning science now, not many girls did.

"The sun? It doesn't go anywhere. We spin around it," I said, wrapping my arm around 
here. There was a blanket in the corner, and I grabbed it and dragged it under our butts.

"But it's so small," she said, making a circle with her hands and looking at the sun like a 
telescope.

"It just seems small, like the cat over there. Looks tiny, like it could fit in your hand, but 
when you go over to find it, it's much bigger. The sun's the same way, we're just really, 
really, far away from it," I tried to explain. I had taken some science classes, but I hadn't 
taken a lot of advanced classes.

"Okay, but where does it go?" she asked, leaning against my body. The sun was dipping 
down, slowly, but I was enjoying the other view.

"We go, remember? We go around it, and the other side of the Earth gets the sun," I said, 
content to feel like the man with my sweet Saffron wrapped around me. 

"So you mean like Lin Mai's side?" she asked, nuzzling her head against mine.

"Yeah, it's," I said, looking at her close her eyes, propped up against me. "The Earth 
spins around the sun, but it also spins around itself. So since we're spinning around, it 
seems like it's moving."

"Its funny, I don't feel dizzy," she said. I could feel her hot breath on my chest through 
my shirt. 

"Well we're, we're used to it, I guess," I said, wrapping the blanket around us. 

"Good, good," she said. I pulled the blanket a little closer, feeling her soft little bum. It 
was nice, after all. 

"Well, there…she…goes," I said, watching the sun disappear down the horizon. I turned 
my head around to see my sweet Saffron, slumbering and slobbering on my sleeve. I 
grinned, this wasn't exactly what I thought sleeping with Saffron would be like.



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