Girl Fag 22
It was getting sorta late, like around ten when I got on the computer. I didn't use it a whole lot. It just seemed kind of boring usually and the games my brothers liked either freaked me out, like that Doom game that Mark played, or just didn't make a lot of sense, like the Black and White game that Scott enjoyed so much. He had a really big cow that would dance with his villagers. What kind of game is that? Steve used it just so he could check out his muscle girls and Henry, well, who knows…He always seemed to doing nothing when someone was around, so he was probably just checking out porn.
I was gonna check out some porn too, which was a first for me. Not cause I had anything against porn, I didn't really care one way or the other, it was just that it seemed silly to look at pictures when you could be doing something else. Especially now that I had someone I could be doing that something else with, you know what I mean? But I really wanted to figure this BDSM stuff out, or at least get some ideas, so I ran a search on BDSM and that gave me a headache. You know how many links that'll give you? Like 56 million or something and how was I supposed to know a good one from a bad one?
I just sort of chose them at random, really, but the ones I was picking were like ads for web sites that wanted my credit card number. I didn't even have a credit card, but I saw some pretty sick pictures. A spanking is one thing, but like putting a girl's boobs in a vise? Uhhh…No thanks! I didn't like my tits a whole lot, and I wished they were even smaller than they were, but if someone ever tried to do that to me I'd declare nuclear war on his butt!
I heard Daddy coming in the kitchen, so I hit the little button at the top, the one that looked like a house, cause that got me to the email thing fast, and I typed in my nickname and my password, and I had some email. Spam mostly, but some fan mail which was always nice because it was serious mail. I don't mean like email from guy saying, 'You built a great car and you rock' this was like from the California Porsche Enthusiasts telling me they were showing off that old Boxter I'd painted in San Francisco and if I wanted to come down, with my family, they'd hook me up.
For whatever reason the painting I did got a lot more notice than anything else, but I'd put a zillion hours into that Porsche. We all had, even though dad kept saying "Heil Hitler" everytime something went wrong. Like Mark fabricated a new oil pan, cause the old one didn't fit anymore, and it was exactly one ghost too wide for the place it was going. Mark swore he made it right and we measured it, all of us, the pan and the mounts, and it shoulda fit. "Heil Hitler" as my Daddy said…That's a ghost, in technical automotive talk. When something should fit and doesn't for no good reason. All you can do is swear, make another one the exact same size, and watch it slide right in perfectly. Weird, huh?
Anyway, other than that I didn't have a lot of new email. I'd never gotten a real email in my life, like from a friend? But I hadn't ever sent one either. I wondered if Julie had an email, maybe we could share pictures or something. Except I'd rather see her in person. But maybe if we got one of those webcams, cause she seemed like sort of a strict girl, you know? And Beaverton was a long ways away and just seeing Julie smile would be…Hmmm.
Daddy was with Scott, who'd just gotten back from Pullman and he was walking in the little den where I was. "Hey, Ann. I was just gonna do that too," he gestured at the computer.
"Oh, sure. I'm done anyway," I shrugged and got up.
Daddy was going up the stairs and I listened to his footsteps as Scott checked his email and talked to me about how the weekend had been. I didn't really say a whole lot about what I'd been doing, and Scott was his usual vague self about what he'd been up to. I grabbed one of the old dining chairs we had by the computer desk and pulled it up, figuring Scott might be a good person to talk to, so long as we were quiet and alone.
"Hey, um, could help me with something?" I asked Scott when it looked like he was done with what he was doing, except he never was. Scott ran the business online, him and David, but mostly Scott and so he was always busy with stuff on the computer.
"Sure, you got homework or something?"
"No," I shook my head. "Nothing like that. I was wondering about BDSM and stuff like that?" my voice was real soft and I glanced over my shoulder, but nobody else was even downstairs.
"BDSM?" Scott narrowed his eyes a little. "What do you want to know about that for?"
I shrugged, "I just want to, that's all." Then I giggled, unable to help myself and Scott was gonna find out from Steve anyway, "I got a girlfriend, Jane Hudson, and she likes it, kinda."
"You have a girlfriend?" Scott looked like he didn't believe me right away. "I thought you wanted to be queer, like a guy?"
"Yeah, I do," I nodded, only half-realizing how weird my conversations were getting these days. "But I'm sort of a queer girl now, too."
"Uh, okay," Scott laughed. "You're so weird, Ann. I thought I had problems!"
"I know!" I laughed, grabbing Scott's arm. He was the only one of my brothers with blonde hair like mine, and it was long. I wondered what it would look like on me. "So, um, can you help me?"
"Yeah, I can help you. I know some stuff," he shrugged. "I know some web sites too, what do you want to know?"
"I don't know, uh…Everything?" I laughed.
"There is no everything," he grinned at me. "Here, this place is sorta handy." He was taking us to something called 'The Deviant's Dictionary' which seemed to have definitions and explanations for just about every kind of sex you could think of, and a whole lot that you couldn't.
We looked at that stuff for awhile and at least I got a good understanding of some of the terms, but it wasn't really like talking to someone either. I wished I'd gotten to talk to Coach the day before, instead of just getting half-raped by Levi. The good thing was that I'd get to see Coach in the morning, assuming he'd be there, but I didn't figure on him standing me up. Even if he did feel bad for the way his friend had acted.
"Does this help at all?" Scott asked me.
"A little, I guess, I don't know," I shrugged. "Reading that stuff I think I'm sort of submissive more than dominant."
"Maybe you're a switch," Scott was moving the mouse, looking around until he found some paragraph talking about 'Switches' whatever that was and as I read it, I started feeling a little better, mostly cause it sounded like me.
A switch is someone who can be submissive or dominant, depending on who they're with and what they feel like doing. That sounded a lot like me just because I was sort of a switch between boy and girl. I mean, most of the time I was a guy and I just wanted to do guy things, but every now and then I felt different, like a girl, sorta, and I just tried to hide those feelings away and ignore them. I was also kind of a switch about being straight or gay, since I wanted to be gay all the time, but technically I was straight when I was with a boy, even though I felt straight when I was with a girl.
So if I was a switch when it came to my gender, and I was switch when it came to my sexuality, then it made total sense that I'd be a switch when it came to this BDSM stuff too! Didn't it? I mean my whole life was nothing but switching, right? So this just seemed too good to be true, really. I was tailor made for being a switch. I grinned and practically rubbed my hands together as I puzzled all that over in my little brain, deciding that yeah, it was okay to let Coach totally dominate me one day, and then find myself getting turned on because I could make Jane blush with embarrassment the next.
That might have been all I needed, just a little explanation to really give my confidence a little something to fall back on. I still didn't know exactly what I was doing, or how to go about doing it, but at least I didn't have to worry that I was trying to fool myself. I was okay and I know that probably doesn't seem like much to anybody who never went through the stuff I was going through, but believe me, it was a big deal to me.
"You like that huh?" Scott was chuckling at my reactions as I started understanding things a little better.
"Yeah," I nodded. "Thanks, Scott."
"No problem," he killed the web page and then cleared the history and emptied the temporary folders where all the stuff we'd looked at was stored. "No sense leaving any evidence," he grinned. "You know, when pop finds out you got a girlfriend…"
I laughed at him, "Daddy knows already. I told him."
"Really?" Scott sat back a little. "What uh, what did he say?"
"He said it was my life," I shrugged. "If I could handle the trouble then he was okay with it."
"Maybe he figures it's like a phase or something," Scott wondered. "Like you'll grow out of it."
"Maybe," I looked at my brother, rubbing his thigh. "You ever think about telling him?"
"Yeah," he nodded, "Sometimes."
"He might be cool with it," I said.
"I don't think it would be the same thing to him," Scott sighed. "Guys like lesbians, even the ones who say they don't." He made me laugh at that. "No, I'm serious. Guys are into it, I mean as long as they're lipstick lesbians."
"Lipstick lesbians?" I grinned at my brother, like what was he talking about?
"Yeah, like you and Jane," Scott smiled. "She's definitely a lipstick lesbian."
"What about me?" I asked. "I don't wear lipstick."
"No, you don't, you're just a dyke," Scott laughed at me, teasing me a little. "Let's go to bed."
"Mmmm…I gotta make a phone call first. I'll see you in the morning," I gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Dyke, huh?" I said under my breath and laughed. That sounded like a really bad word for some reason, even worse than fag.
"Hey, what are you doing?" I asked Julie quietly.
"Hi. I was just sleeping a little," Julie answered, sounding like she'd been sleeping a lot.
"Sorry I woke you up. I just wanted to…"
"No, that's okay. I'm glad you called," I could hear her stretching just a little, making a soft little sighing sound.
"Really?" I asked, smiling happily to myself.
"Yeah. I was thinking about you."
"Oh yeah? Thinking about me how?"
"Uhhh…" she giggled a little.
"Come on, you're always teasing me," I scolded her softly. "What were you thinking about?"
"I was thinking about you being a boy, sorta…" she swallowed hard enough so I could hear it over the phone.
"Yeah, well, I am a boy kinda."
"Yeah, that's what I mean, if you're sort of a boy then um, I was thinking about, uh…" Julie paused for a couple heartbeats. "I was thinking about kissing you."
I think she was holding her breath, maybe wondering if I'd laugh at her or just hang up.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that…" she was apologizing quickly and I cut her off.
"It's okay," my heart was beating faster. "I was um, thinking about kissing you too." I licked my lips. "Before, when we were talking, I sort of wished I could kiss you."
"Really?" Julie's voice was so soft then.
"Yeah. I uh, I like you a lot."
"I like you too."
"I mean I like you more than just a friend."
Now it was my turn to wait for her to laugh in my face or slam the phone down in my ear, but I didn't really think she would.
"Me too," Julie whispered. "Since before, but I was afraid to say it."
"Yeah, me too," I sighed softly. "I didn't think you'd like me cause I'm a girl."
"I didn't think you'd like me cause I'm a girl!" she giggled and I laughed too. Feeling like I was on top of the world suddenly.
"I really want to see you."
"Come over tomorrow, after school," Julie said, her voice quietly excited.
"I can't, I got football after school."
"Please? Just once, skip it and come over. I want to see you too," Julie begged me.
"Um…" I thought about it. I could afford to miss one practice, right? I could tell Coach I had some family thing or something, he'd be okay. I just needed a ride, but I could get one. "Okay. I'll come over like 4:30 or so, uh, where do you want to meet?"
"Really!" Julie laughed happily. "My house, just come here, it'll be okay."
"Your house? Uh, alright," I shrugged to myself figuring her parents must both work or something. "Where do you live?"
I wrote down directions to Julie's house and we talked for a little bit longer, mostly just both of us complaining about living so far apart. It was weird talking to her and knowing that she really liked me the same way I liked her. I'd been so full of doubt and fear before, wondering if we were just friends or what, but now I knew. She wanted to kiss me even, it would be her very first kiss ever and she wanted it to be with me. If we weren't in love I didn't know what the word meant.
Greg was just coming in when I was dialing Jane's number; he gave me a little wave and a smile and went upstairs. He'd been out with his newest girlfriend, little Carol Hahn, the seventh grader, according to my brother Henry as we'd sat around the dinner table earlier. She was only 13 and Steve had said that was sorta young, even for Greg who was just barely turned 16, but Daddy had just shrugged and if he didn't care, then it was okay. I wondered how Greg had hooked up with her, since I barely knew her even though we went to the same school.
"Hey girl," I said softly when Jane picked up her phone.
"Girl huh?" she giggled. "I like it. What are you doing?"
"Calling you!" I laughed. "You made me promise, remember?"
"I shoulda made you promise to come over," Jane hadn't been asleep at all from the sound of her voice.
"Guess what," I said, and this was what I'd really been waiting for.
"What?"
"I told my dad about us," I told Jane. "That I'm really mostly a guy and you're my girlfriend and…"
"What?" she practically shrieked and for just a second I thought I'd totally screwed up somehow. But wasn't this what she wanted?
"I told him…" I repeated slowly, "…and…"
"You're so awesome!" Jane sounded like she was bouncing off her butt. "God! That's cool! You really love me, huh?"
"Yeah," I laughed, feeling much relieved.
"I love you, Ann, so much! God! That's the best ever!" Jane was breathing heavily and I just listened to her for a minute, feeling pretty good about myself. "I am so gonna fuck your brains out when I see you again! I swear, Ann! I'm gonna do everything, okay? Whatever you want."
"Okay, yeah," I grinned foolishly into the phone and life was pretty good right then. "So…What are you doing?" I asked.
"Huh…Oh! Um, just painting my toes, wondering why I have a boyfriend who never calls," Jane teased me, trying to act cool after her recent excitement.
"Yeah right!" I laughed. "What did you do today?"
"We went over to Beaverton, me and Sherry. Hey did you know they got a new store there? Sorta downtown, it's an accessory store."
"What's that?" I asked, having no idea what an accessory store was.
"It's where they sell like jewelry and makeup and hair clips and stuff," Jane laughed. "Accessories, you know? They do manicures and pedicures there too, but it's kind of expensive. Some Vietnamese woman owns it."
"Oh," I shrugged to myself, wondering what the big deal was.
"It's cool, they doing piercing too. The lady said she'll pierce anything!" Jane giggled and lowered her voice. "Sherry wanted me to get my nipples pierced, but I said I'd have to ask you first."
"Oh yeah?" I asked, a little more interested suddenly.
"Yeah, wouldn't that be cool? I could get like rings or something, I don't know," she paused. "Would you like that? Do you think it would be okay?"
It was her body, I didn't really know why she was asking me, but that was her thing anyway. She would look pretty hot with pierced nipples though, I thought. I could even get like a little chain or something, I grinned to myself, imagining the things I could do and wondering if I wasn't turning into a total dyke or something, thinking that was probably the right word for what I was.
"Uh, yeah," I cleared my throat softly. "Yeah, that would be pretty hot."
"Yeah, I think so too!" Jane gushed. "I want you to be there though, you know, so you can watch and everything. Okay?"
"Sure, yeah," I was agreeing, not really understanding completely what I was agreeing to.
"So tomorrow then, okay?" Jane asked. "Like right after practice? I have cheerleading until 5:30 and you got football, right? I'll pick you up?"
"Tomorrow?" I blinked hard at that. I was skipping practice so I could meet Julie and hopefully give her the first kiss of her life.
"Well, yeah," Jane sounded a little concerned. "You can't go or something?"
"Uh, well I was sorta going to skip practice," I said slowly, trying to think really fast.
I was going to Beaverton, and I needed a ride, but going with Jane? She might want to see me kiss Julie, just cause it would make her feel excited or bad, or something, but what would Julie think? She would freak out, I told myself, that's what she would think. Unless Jane was just like a friend of mine, not a girlfriend at all, then maybe…
But that wouldn't work, I told myself. It was a stupid idea and even if I could get Jane to somehow pretend she wasn't my girlfriend just so I could kiss another girl, Julie would know. Wouldn't she? I mean you can't just stop being boyfriend and girlfriend and fool someone else, especially the way Jane acted. And who was I fooling? If I told Jane not to act like my girlfriend she was gonna be seriously pissed. I knew I would be. I wouldn't care at all about the other girl, in fact I'd go out of my way to make sure everyone knew who the real girlfriend was, you know what I mean?
Nah, it was a horrible idea and it was gonna get me killed if I tried it. One way or the other, either Julie or Jane was gonna hate me, probably both of them, just because I was having my period and so freakin' horny I couldn't think straight. It was making me greedy, that's all, just plain greedy. So no, I wasn't gonna say what I was gonna say, was I?
"Skip practice? Why?" Jane asked, just like I knew she would.
"Cause um, you remember that girl, Julie? The one I told you about?" I held my breath.
"Yes," Jane answered cautiously.
"Well, she uh, she wants me to come over to her house tomorrow and uh, well…"
"Oh, well that's okay," Jane said in a neutral voice. "I'd love to meet her."
"She. Well, um…Her and I…She doesn't know about…You," I was still holding my breath and my voice was a hoarse whisper.
"So? You can tell her all about me tomorrow," Jane giggled, but it made me nervous. "You can tell her how you thought about her while you fucked me."
"I…Uh, could…" I laughed weakly, hoping she was joking. "I'd rather sort of let her get used to the idea that me and you are…Friends though. First…I mean, and then uh, later…You know, sorta tell her about the, um, other stuff."
Jane laughed, "You want to pretend like I'm not your girlfriend?"
"Um, yeah," I winced and braced myself.
"Okay," Jane sounded like it was no big deal.
"Okay?" I blinked with disbelief.
"Okay. Yeah, you like her right? I told you before, it's up to you. I'll do whatever you want me to, Ann," Jane said quietly. "If you don't believe me, I guess here's your chance to find out, right?"
"Uh, yeah." Or it was Jane's chance to totally ruin my chances with Julie. But I couldn't believe she was that devious, was she? That would just be plain old fashioned mean. But I was being kind of a dick, wasn't I? Maybe I deserved something like that.
"Good, so um, I'll skip out too and pick you up at your house after school, okay?" Jane sounded happy and I really hoped she was.
"Sure, okay."
"What?" Jane giggled. "You sound like you're sad or something."
"No, I'm not," I tried to sound a little more enthusiastic. "I'm just tired I guess."
"Too tired to make me cum?" Jane whispered with a soft laugh.
"Huh?"
"Tell me what you're gonna do to me after I get my nipples pierced," Jane sighed and I imagined her in bed, getting comfortable for a little bedtime story.
So I spent the next hour sitting on the kitchen floor, rubbing my hard little clit through my pajama bottoms and listening to Jane moan softly as I told her one. I was starting to get the hang of this boyfriend thing.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Monday morning came early, a lot earlier than I thought it would, but I got up anyway. The first thought I had was that I was in trouble, because I woke up thinking about Jane, or maybe Julie, but most probably both of them, really. I just tried to put them out of my mind though. I mean, I'd made my bed anyway, so I'd get the chance to lie down in it later. But part of me was thinking that if there was ever a day for a really big asteroid to hit the earth, this probably wasn't gonna be a bad one for it.
What the heck had I been thinking last night? Introducing Jane to Julie? I had to be whacked!
Coach was at the school weight room, just like always, and if he was surprised to see me, he didn't show it. He didn't try to apologize for anything either, which I was glad of. I didn't want to have to try and tell him that none of what happened with Levi was his fault, and at least half of it was probably mine anyway. We just got to work on those girly tits of mine, and the rest of me too, since Coach figured it was best not to take any chances with girly hips, or girly thighs either.
"Hey Coach?" I was grunting under a set of barbells that I was doing butterflies with. "What uh, what do you know about BDSM?"
"What do I know about BDSM?" Coach chuckled. "What do you know about cars?"
"Everything," I grunted. "Almost."
"Well, there ya are, boy."
"I uh, well…I got a couple uh…Problems," I was fighting those darn weights.
"What sorta problems?…Keep them arms straight, no bouncing…Slow it down."
"Yes sir," I focused on doing the weights the way I supposed to do them. "Girl problems."
"Girl problems?" Coach laughed. "Okay, I know a damn sight more about BDSM than I do about girls, Russet."
"I got a girlfriend and she wants me to tell her everything," I was done with my sets and I sat up, panting a little. "Like what to do and what to wear, everything. She says she'll do whatever I want, even if it really embarrasses her."
"Heh," Coach snorted.
"And I got another girl, but she ain't really my girlfriend or anything, but she acts all guilty and says no all the time, like she doesn't want me touching her. But I know she really does cause she cums like crazy when I do." I might have blushed a little saying that last part, but I was so red faced and sweaty already I doubt Coach would have even noticed.
"And that's your problems?" Coach looked at me like I was pulling his leg.
"Yes sir," I nodded.
"Let's do 15 minutes on the Stepmaster, get those legs burning."
Coach dragged me over to a machine that had the unique ability to make me cry after five minutes of using it. He wasn't kidding about burning my legs.
"Bout level 6 for a good warm-up," Coach chuckled and I moaned.
"Hell son, it don't sound like problems to me," Coach shrugged. "Sounds like you oughta turn Mormon and marry them two girls."
I laughed, despite moving my arms and legs like I was running up an endless flight of stairs at a pretty good clip.
"But I take it that you ain't exactly sure what to do with opportunities like those," Coach nodded thoughtfully. "Okay, this first girl, your girlfriend, she likes BDSM, is that what your saying?"
"Uh, yeah, I think so…" I was breathing hard, sorta bouncing up and down as I ran. "…She likes it when I embarrass her…In front of people…Make her do sexy stuff…You know?"
"Hmmm…" Coach rubbed his nose. "And this other girl, the guilty one, what's the deal with her? She's guilty about what? Her parents finding out she's queer or something?"
"Uh-uh…" I shook my head, "…She doesn't want to get caught with me…At uh, at work…"
"That so?" Coach smiled. "So she's older huh? Not so old as me though I bet." He chuckled then, "She likes it when you take charge though, sorta make her do it?"
"Sorta…" I nodded, "…Uh, I think so."
"Okay, okay…" Coach gave that some thought, "You gonna see this woman today? Tonight maybe?"
"Nope," I was saving my breath.
"Well, next time you're with her you try this, when she starts saying no, I mean the second she says it, you slap her face." I looked at Coach sharply. "Not hard or nothin', just a little one so she knows you care. If she gets pissed do it again and tell her to shut-up, I mean that. Sometimes a little bottom bitch will wanna find out if you're really on top. You slap her again and tell her to do something, whatever gets you off with this girl. Tell her to take her clothes off or something. Don't say it mean, just say it like there ain't no room for discussion, got it?"
"Wha…What if she…Gets pissed…Uh…Again…?" I panted.
"Then you tell her you're sorry and offer her some gum. If this woman is actin' like you say she does, she ain't gonna be really pissed at all. But you gotta be on top, right? She's your hole, that's it, no arguing. If it don't work out, don't be mad, don't hate her, just say okay and leave."
"…Okay…" I nodded weakly. I still had 10 minutes to go on those stairs and I could barely get the word out.
"Now the girlfriend," Coach dialed the machine up to eight and I was running harder, pushing my legs against even more resistance and my ass was aching! "She's sorta like the other one, but different. The woman don't want to be caught, but that's her excuse for playing hard to get and if she's letting you bang her at work, then hell, the risk is making her pretty damn happy too."
"Uhhh-huh…" I nodded, finding my second wind.
"But the girlfriend, she doesn't just want to be caught doin' what she ain't sposed to be, it doesn't get real good for her unless she is caught. Right? Or am I misunderstanding what you told me?"
"N-No…" I coughed a little and picked up the pace, trying to keep my little meter green and happy for Coach.
"Okay, then so you're feeling a little stuck, I bet," Coach grinned at me. "Tryin' to think of ways to get her in trouble without getting in a lot of trouble. That's a tough one there, those humiliation hounds are dangerous. A little wild and unpredictable, but a hell of a good ride, boy. Hell of a ride."
"She uh…Likes…BDSM…" I breathed, watching the clock go down too slowly. Five and half minutes to go.
"Well, there you go then," Coach nodded. "You just gotta redirect all that passion. Make the public stuff a special occasion, a little reward for all that hard play in private."
"Y-Yeah…" I spit a little on the towel hanging around my neck.
"You think you could whip her tits? Like I done to you?" Coach narrowed his eyes at me.
"I…I think so…Coach…." I huffed. "I'm a…A switch…"
"A switch huh? Where'd you learn that, boy?" Coach laughed.
"…In…Inter…Net…Internet…" I nodded as I finally got the word out.
"Internet huh?" Coach shook his head. "Well you might be a switch, Russet, or you might just be one mixed up little fag. Time will tell. Best thing you can do is whip her tits straight off. A girl loves her tits, her pussy too, but tits can take a lot more punishment than a pussy can, plus it scares the hell out of 'em."
"Oh…" I smiled weakly, thinking about how scared I'd been and I didn't even like my tits that much.
"Get her used to safety words, talk about limits and how and when and why to stop, and how stopping is just as important as starting. Let her know you're gonna take care of her, be confident all the time, every minute you're with her, not just when you two are playing, but all the time. She's gotta see it, gotta know you're in charge so she'll believe it when she has to, see? When her skin's burning and her body's shivering, and her gut's aching, she needs to remember that she's never seen you weak."
Coach reached over and cranked the dial up to nine.
"That'll make her strong too. You got all that?" Coach was standing there with his arms crossed.
"N-Not…Uh…Really…" just a couple more minutes, I thought, and then I could die.
"Heh," Coach chuckled. "I didn't figure."
Awhile later, after I'd recovered, Coach had me doing some pull-ups. "Screw all those machines, Russet. A good pull-up works more of your body than any contraption ever devised by mortal man."
"Kay…" I grunted. I was doing sets of 20, five of them, and a hundred pull-ups was a bunch.
"Here," Coach put a big hand under my butt, helping me just a little to get through the last dozen or so. "If you're serious about playin' smack bottom with your girlfriend, just bring her round my place sometime. I won't do nothin' but watch, give you some tips maybe, make sure you don't step on your dick."
"Really?" I gasped, dropping to my feet and stretching my arms.
"Sure," Coach shrugged. "I'm a teacher ain't I?" he laughed. "Course if you just need some discipline for yourself…My door's always open."
"Thanks Coach," I nodded. "We're going to Beaverton tonight, gonna get her nipples pierced." I smiled, and then remembered how I was going to skip practice, "Uh, sort of right after school."
"After school huh, meaning after practice?" Coach gave me a tough look.
"Well, um, I was thinking maybe…"
"Take a day off, huh?" Coach shook his head. "You really do have a girlfriend, don't ya? You skip today and I'm gonna grind your ass tomorrow, you know that right?"
"Yes sir," I nodded.
"Nipples pierced, eh?" Coach shrugged. "I reckon. You gonna do yours too? Get some gold for those girly tits of yours?"
"Uh, I don't think so," I hadn't really thought about it at all.
"You know, I knew these two boys once, back in college. They had their nips pierced and they had these little clips so they could link their tits together, see what I mean? Then if one of 'em pulled, or jerked, or even breathed funny it would yank those nipples hard." Coach chuckled, "Always looked like fun, but if someone yelled fire they'd have been in a heap of trouble!"
"Oh, uh…"
"Anyway, a good little fag oughta have his nipples pierced," Coach reached up feeling my right breast through my damp t-shirt. "Still a little soft, but firming up nice; you got some muscle under there, Russet. Let's do some crunches while you think about getting pierced."
I was about exhausted after my workout. I always had a hard time believing how much we could do in just an hour, but Coach wasn't much for sitting still, either. I tried to remember everything he'd been telling me, wondering if some of it was good advice or not. Slapping Miss Haven? I wasn't sure I could do that, even though Coach seemed to think I could. And bringing Jane to Coach's house, hmmm…I'd have to think on that one too. She'd get off on him watching though, I knew that. It'd be nice having someone to tell me what to do too, I just wasn't sure what Jane would think of me and Coach being, you know, fags. But probably Coach didn't really want her knowing that much about him anyway, it all seemed sorta confusing.
I had some cramps after I'd showered and got cleaned up, but they weren't so bad. The headache was worse, and I didn't know why I got those. They didn't last long, but they sure hurt. I needed some aspirin or something, and the only place I was getting those was from Nurse Haven. I was in homeroom and Matt was smiling at me, wanting to talk, I knew. I tried to smile back, but my head was pounding. I finally had to get up and tell my teacher I wasn't feeling good, and I guess she could tell I was serious. She wrote me a pass and sent me to the nurse's office.
"Uh, Ann," Nurse Haven looked surprised to see me, as I suppose she shoulda been, and her face flushed a little. She had three other kids in her office though, cause it was early Monday morning probably, but I didn't pay much attention to them. "What's wrong?" Nurse Haven seemed to forget about the stuff we did though and acted like a normal nurse.
"I have a headache," I told her. "Some cramps too." I was squinting a little cause the light was making it worse.
"Come on, in here…" she had her hand on my shoulder, guiding me into the little room she had with the bed in it. "Lie down. You're having your period?"
I nodded, laying down and closing my eyes.
"Is it normal? I mean it's on time and there's nothing, uh, funny about it?" she was putting a thermometer in my mouth. "Under your tongue, dear."
"Mmmpph…It's normal," I said a little awkwardly.
"Okay, good. I'll get you some aspirin, okay? And something for your forehead."
I spent about half an hour in the bed, letting the aspirins do their thing and trying to relax under a warm damp towel that Nurse Haven had given me. It felt really good, especially since the lights were off. I could hear her dealing with the other kids, calling someone's parent to come get one of them, and sending the others back to their classes. I felt myself getting sleepy and I thought I'd never been in a bed so comfortable as that one.
"How are we feeling, better?" Nurse Haven walked into the room, not turning on the light, but just leaving the door open a little so she could see.
"Yeah," I nodded. "It's almost gone."
"Good," she sat down in a chair next to the bed, pulling it closer. "Do you get headaches like this a lot when you menstruate?"
"No. Not really, just once in awhile," I shrugged a little. "I was working out this morning, so…"
"Working out?" she licked her lips and kinda looked at my body. I was clothed, of course, but she knew what I looked like under there anyway and she liked it.
"Yeah."
"How often do you get your period, is it regular? Or sorta unpredictable?"
"Um, unpredictable. I get it early sometimes, and late too," I smiled a little self-consciously, feeling a little embarrassed talking about it, even with her.
"That's okay. You're a very active girl. Sometimes getting a lot of exercise can do that, and you're body is still trying to figure out how to deal with having a period. When did you get your first one?"
Nurse Haven was touching me, just a little, sort of rubbing my arm as I lay there. I didn't mind that so much though, and it didn't really seem like anything except concern maybe. But she sure was asking a lot of questions, I thought, even for a school nurse. It sort of made me feel warm all over though and my headache was pretty much forgotten by then.
"I was almost thirteen," I told her, licking my lips.
"And how about your breasts, Ann? Are they sensitive? Do they get puffy and sore?" Nurse Haven was touching my tits, rubbing them gently through my shirt and I gasped, nodding quickly.
"Okay, and everything down here is normal you said?" she moved her hand down, across my tummy to touch my crotch and I nodded. "Do you think I could um, take a look?" Nurse Haven's voice had a little tremor in it, "Just to make sure?
"Uh…" I swallowed hard, mostly because I wasn't really sure I wanted anyone poking around down there, especially when I was on my period. But my nipples were hard and itchy, and my heart was beating a little quick too. Nurse Haven was really pretty, I thought, sitting there with light from the open door falling across her face. More beautiful than I'd ever noticed before, if that was even possible.
"It's okay," she practically whispered. "I'll lock the door."
She left the bedroom, locking the door to her office and then returning to look down at me. "Can I unbutton these…" she reached towards my jeans and her fingers started undoing my belt.
I closed my eyes as she opened my pants slowly and pulled them down my thighs. She was touching my briefs, just barely, but enough to make me tremble a little. This wasn't like before, the way she was acting; I don't think she wanted me to be in charge at all right then. Maybe Nurse Haven was a switch too, I thought, or maybe she was something else, I didn't know. But I could feel her fingers pressing through the tight cotton of my underwear, brushing across my clit and down to feel the pad pressed against my moist sex. I took a deep ragged breath and let it out slowly.
"Are you okay? I'm just going to take a look…Here we go…Slowly…That's it…" and she was pulling my briefs down carefully.
She sort of turned them inside out so she could see my pad, barely spotted with blood at all since I'd just had a shower maybe an hour before. I looked down my body, watching her as she lowered her head, bringing her face closer to my exposed vagina.
"Ohhh…" I gasped slightly as I felt her fingers found the top of my slit, grazing my clitoris which was peeking out hard and pink.
"Does it hurt?" Nurse Haven asked me and I shook my head.
"N-Nooo…" I sighed as she touched me again.
"Are you sure?" she was breathing hard too, staring at me although her face was mostly just a shadow. "I can make it feel better, Ann. I can…Kiss it…If you want me to," and then she was kissing my clit, touching it with the tip of her tongue and making me shudder and my clit was growing harder and bigger somehow.
I had my fingers in Nurse Haven's hair and she had her lips around my clit, which was swelling and growing until it would barely fit in her warm wet mouth and it felt so good. She was sliding her mouth up and down along the shaft and her fingers were underneath, playing with my balls and I was gonna cum and I felt my cock throbbing and aching and I was screaming…
I sat up suddenly, not knowing for a second where I was. I felt hot all over, like I was burning up and down between my legs my sex throbbed and I knew I was soaked. My heart was racing and I could barely breathe and then I remembered what had been happening, how Nurse Haven had been licking my pussy, not caring at all that I was having my period. She'd been sucking my clit like a little cock and it had changed into a real cock and I…I'd been cumming and I had balls and I'd been shooting sperm in Miss Haven's mouth!
It had been a serious dream, like one of those wet dreams that boys have, and maybe girls too, I told myself, since I'd just had one. I knew I'd cum, I could feel it still down in my tummy, like I'd just gotten off a roller coaster. And down between my thighs, my pad was heavy with juices and I could feel the damp spreading down to my butt. I must have cum a lot and I felt a rush of humiliation as Nurse Haven opened the door.
"Ann? Are you okay?"
The towel had fallen off my forehead and she touched me with her hand, trying to see if I was warm or anything, and of course I was. I wondered if she could smell my sex, I couldn't, but that didn't mean anything. I lay back down and crossed my arms, taking slow deep breaths while Nurse Haven got me another towel. If she suspected anything, she didn't show it, and I was glad.
Later I was in the bathroom, the one in Nurse Haven's office, looking at the mess in my briefs. I had my pants down around my ankles, and my underwear tight around my thighs, and I removed my pad carefully. It was wet and heavy, mostly with girl juice, but a little spotted with blood too. I set it on the sink and wondered what to do about my briefs, they'd caught a lot of my cum too, and while there wasn't any blood or anything, they were still wet. I frowned, kicking off my boots and taking off my pants and then my underwear, wondering if I could wash them or something. I didn't even have an extra pad with me though. I'd never needed one before and I felt super stupid.
"How are you doing in there, Ann?" Nurse Haven asked quietly, knocking lightly on the door.
I opened it, just a little, peeking at her a little embarrassed by the situation. "I uh, I don't have any more pads," I said, "And my underwear is…"
Nurse Haven was suddenly blushing too, and looking down at her breasts or something. I'd seen her looking like that before, and not in my dreams. She was thinking about me again, wondering what I looked like behind that door, I thought. I could see the guilt all over her face for having wicked sexy thoughts about one of her students and it was giving me a thrill. This was her way of telling me she wanted to play, I understood. Like she couldn't bring herself to just say it, she had to show me.
I'd stopped talking and Nurse Haven looked up at my face, just for a second, and then looked down again quickly. "I uh, I have extra pads," she said softly. "In case…Uh, in case one of the…Girls…" she swallowed thickly.
"Can I have one please?" I asked her, feeling my heart threatening to burst from my chest. This was my chance, I was thinking, this is it, right here, right now. I had to be strong. "Miss Haven…" I said, before she'd gone two steps.
"Y-Yes?" she turned around but didn't look at me.
"Lock the door too.," I told her, trying to sound like anything but the nervous eighth grader I was.
"Oh, uh…" she nodded, almost reluctantly, but she was going to do it. She wanted to do it and my heart skipped a dozen beats.
I waited in the bathroom until she knocked again, despite the fact that the door was still halfway open. I took a deep breath and hoped Coach knew what he was talking about and opened the door completely so Nurse Haven could see me standing there with just my shirt on, naked from the waist down.
"H-Here's a pad…" Miss Haven held it out, a little package wrapped in plastic.
The bathroom was good sized, since it had to fit handicapped kids too. There was a lot of room, a low big sink, and handrails and all that stuff. I stepped back a little, giving Nurse Haven some room to come inside, but not taking the pad from her.
"Come in here," I said calmly, but inside I could hardly breathe.
Nurse Haven took a few steps and licked her lips, "I don't think, uh…We shouldn't be…"
*SLAP*
I slapped her left cheek with my right hand, and not very hard at all, but it sounded hard the way the sound bounced and echoed off the tiled walls in that bathroom. Nurse Haven jerked her head back, bringing a hand to her face and looking at me with wide injured eyes. I thought she was going to cry for a second and I was almost ready to start apologizing.
"I…I'm sorry," Nurse Haven whispered and then looked down.
"Take off your clothes. I want to look at you," I said and I almost thought I was gonna collapse, I was so excited. She wasn't mad at all; it was just like Coach had said it would be. She wanted me to tell her what to do, the same way Jane did.
I stared at Miss Haven as she carefully removed her nurse's uniform, unbuttoning her white blouse first and exposing her full creamy breasts, constrained in a rather simple white bra. She took off her skirt as well, so I could see her old-fashioned garter belt around her narrow waist, holding up her white stockings, which must have been made of real silk, I thought. They looked expensive and totally sexy. And over the garters she wore white panties, plain but for a little bit of lace in the front and I could see just a hint of her brown pubic hair curling beneath it.
Nurse Haven's body was solid too, a lot more so than I'd ever gotten to appreciate before, or even suspect. I knew she was fit, I'd seen how toned and strong her thighs were and stuff, but now I could see that her abs were great! Even better than mine were, and her shoulders and back weren't exactly ripped, but well defined for sure. It was obvious that Miss Haven worked out a lot and maybe it wasn't so strange that she'd ended up being Coach's assistant.
I wondered if Coach knew that Miss Haven looked like that. Not so much like a body builder, but definitely a fitness buff. She looked like the women on ESPN that Steve liked so much, the Miss Fitness America women, or whatever they were called. Nurse Haven was a real hard body, and she was keeping it a secret for some reason. If I had a body like hers, I thought, I would never cover it up and I doubted too many other girls would either, even if they weren't queer.
"Take off your bra," I licked my lips, watching as Miss Haven glanced at me nervously.
I thought she might say something but she didn't, she just reached behind her back and unsnapped her bra so it fell loose around her firm breasts. They were nice sized, and so firm and perfect that they might have been fake, but they weren't. She had light colored nipples that pointed up slightly, short and fat and hard as she pulled her bra away with trembling fingers. The loose straps fell down her arms and she turned to hang it on the wall hooks with her other clothes.
"Your panties, Nurse Haven," I said softly to her back as she was turned around. "Take them off too." I was struggling to contain myself, it seemed like I was ready to burst any second.
"Oh, please! I…I…can't…" she started turning her head…
*SLAP*
…And I stepped forward spanking her ass hard with my hand, a lot harder than I'd slapped her face. "Ah!" she gasped, dropping her head quickly and bringing her hands to her hips, hooking her thumbs in the waistband of her panties.
I watched Nurse Haven as she lowered her panties slowly, almost as if she were teasing us with it, and maybe she was. Her body shivered slightly and she bent over at the waist, exposing her full round white ass to me. I could see her small, pinkish-brown anus, and below that the swell of her pussy, covered with a layer of light brown hair. Her pussy lips were pressed together as she bent over, giving her a plump vulva with a deep cleft, and I stepped closer before Miss Haven could lift a foot to remove her panties completely.
"Stay like that," I told her, and I reached down so I could rub her pussy from behind, finding her wet and greasy and my fingers split her labia easily. Miss Haven was hot inside, and I fingered her sex with my right hand while I rubbed her strong muscular back with the other, keeping her bent straight from the waist like she was touching her toes.
"Do you like boys too?" I asked Nurse Haven, and when she didn't reply immediately I spanked her right ass cheek hard enough to leave my palm print on it.
*SLAP*
"I asked if you like cock!"
"Yes!" Nurse Haven yelped and her body jerked slightly like she was having a spasm or something. "I…I like boys…Cock…Yes…" she moaned softly as I went back to fingering her tight wet hole, which was what Coach had said she was. Miss Haven just wanted to be my hole.
I wish I could say I knew exactly what I was doing, but I didn't. I hadn't planned any of this, it was just like everything else seemed to be in my life, out of control somehow and I had to trust my instincts, or something. I don't know. It was like I didn't have any idea of what I was going to do from one minute to the next, as though part of me was just watching, and just as surprised as Miss Haven was. It was so weird and somehow exciting too, adding another facet to the intense pleasure that filled me.
"Tomorrow…" I breathed, feeling like I was gonna cum just from touching her, "…I'm going to fuck you, Nurse Haven." I had two fingers in her pussy and she was bouncing slightly on her feet, pushing her ass back a little to meet my thrusting hand.
"He-Here?" She practically sobbed.
"Here, yeah, in the bathroom…" I agreed. "At 10:15 you be in here, just like this, bending over and waiting." I twisted my fingers and pushed a third one inside, feeling her soft juicy walls sucking at them like a hungry mouth.
"Oh God…P-Please, Ann…I…I can't…We shouldn't…" she was groaning, working herself close to her orgasm around my fingers and I hardly had to move at all as she rocked her hips and rolled her ass.
"You will, Nurse Haven, or I'll tell everyone you made me do this…" I told her with a quivering voice. "I'll say you forced me to do things…To finger your pussy and let you kiss me…Down there…"
I knew she'd like that, and I was sure she must have known somewhere inside her that I'd never tell anyone something awful like that. But it was what she wanted to hear; as much as anything else, Nurse Haven thrived on her feelings of guilt and humiliation. I didn't understand it, but I didn't really have to, not the way she did. And maybe she didn't understand it either. I was beginning to realize that there were a lot of things we'd never understand about ourselves, and that we just did what we needed to, or we'd go crazy.
"Ohh oh God…Uhhh…God…No…Ahhh!"
She was standing up, no longer bent all the way over, but leaning against the wall for support as her body surrendered to her orgasm. I could feel her cunt around my fingers, contracting and squeezing them, her juices flowing over my hand and down her thighs. I had my fingers stiff and I stabbed her pussy in and out with them until she was barely able to stand and her strong legs wobbled slightly from the effort.
"Suck these, open your mouth…" I brought my hand away from her pussy, rubbing my fingers across Nurse Haven's open mouth as she gasped for air. She was probably barely even aware I was there, but she finally took my fingers between her lips. Licking and sucking her cum from my fingers.
I really wanted to cum too. I needed it bad and I thought about my weird wet dream. I'd never let anyone touch my pussy before Levi had done it a couple days before. Then last night I'd let David rub my clit a little. That hadn't been so bad; neither of those had seriously changed me, had they? And in my dream, when Miss Haven had been sucking me and I'd had a real cock…I needed to cum!
"Turn around now. Give me your panties," I was pushing and pulling at Nurse Haven, who was still a little dazed from cumming hard. She was red faced with pleasure and humiliation, panting for air as she finally gave me her panties.
"Do you want to kiss my pussy?" I asked her, feeling like I was doing something incredibly dangerous. Adrenaline was rushing through me and I felt edgy, or angry almost, and I wondered if this was what I really wanted, to feel someone really touching the one part of me that was undeniably female. But I didn't have a choice.
"Y-Yes…." Nurse Haven whispered.
"Say it!" I told her, reaching up to pinch her left nipple and twisting it hard.
"Yesss!" she moaned. "I want to kiss your pussy!"
"Get on your knees then…" I breathed, pulling at her nipple until it snapped out of my hand like a piece of rubber as Nurse Haven knelt quickly. She wasted no time either, sliding her hands along my legs and pressing her face between my thighs.
I shivered uncontrollably as I felt her lips on my clit and then her tongue across my pussy, splitting my labia and flicking across my sensitive flesh. I'd never felt that before, having my pussy kissed, and it was so exciting that I was suddenly terrified of it. I almost pushed Nurse Haven away as I felt her tongue wriggling deeper, mindless of the fact that I was menstruating, just slipping inside to make me feel like I was being stuck with a million pins and needles all through my sex.
"Ohhh…" I found myself with my hands in Nurse Haven's hair, her panties still in my left fist, knocking the little bobby pins loose so that her blonde hair fell long and tangled around her face and shoulders. I thrust with my hips, arching my back and tilting my cunt to her mouth as she sucked my clitoris between her lips, flicking her tongue across and around it quickly. I was going to cum so hard, I could feel it, my orgasm was gonna be huge.
Nurse Haven had put her arms between my thighs, forcing my legs wide and reaching up between them so she could grip my ass in her hands. She was digging her nails into my skin, giving me even more stimulation and pulling my cunt to her mouth. I thought she must have had her tongue right there at my hymen, tickling my cherry and teasing me, because all I could feel was her soft wriggling muscle pushing against the walls of my virgin pussy.
I wondered if she could taste my period underneath all the juices that seemed to be pouring out of my trembling vagina. I doubted it and my flow was so light probably that she'd barely notice I was menstruating anyway, but it seemed so intimate somehow, just knowing that she was kissing me there. I had always detested my menses, hated the fact that it made me undeniably a girl, but now I had no thoughts of any of that. I felt like a girl and for the first time in my life I thought I even might want to be a girl, but that was only because this felt so, so good!
"Uhhh…Uh…Huhhh…" I was gasping and everything was exploding and all I could do was close my eyes and pour my orgasm out of me, through my sex and over Miss Haven's hungry mouth. I was gushing and her arms tightened around my thighs, inside out as she held my legs apart with her arms and held my cunt to her lips so she could drink my cum. I couldn't breathe and I was biting my lips to keep from screaming.
I sort of blacked out, or something. The intensity of my orgasm just seemed to steal everything from me, including time itself. I have no idea how long I stood there, hanging on to Miss Haven's head, bent over her as she held my body tightly. It had to have been the best orgasm of my life, or so they all seemed to be, to tell the truth, but it was definitely good. Very good and it scared me more than a little, making me wonder if this was all I'd ever want to do. Or worse, if I'd find myself changing, becoming a woman and losing everything about myself that I loved.
Nurse Haven kept licking me for several long minutes, kissing and slurping at my vagina noisily until I was finally able to push her away, my sex suddenly too sensitive for any more of her attention. My clit was on fire and I felt like someone had spanked my pussy or something. I was almost sore down there. But it felt so good too. I felt good all over, it had been a monster cum and now I knew why Sherry had said all the girls like it.
"Can…May I get up?" Nurse Haven was asking me. She was kneeling still and her face was wet with my cum and her spit, it had run down her cheeks and chin and neck. Her red lipstick was smeared all around her mouth and her hair was a horrible tangle of blonde silk. Even her mascara had run, leaking from around her eyes like black tears.
"No," I told her, ripping open the plastic with my teeth and taking out the new pad she'd brought me. I put on her panties, the first pair I'd worn since I was about eight and had stopped wearing dresses to church on Sundays. They were just a little big, sort of, but not too bad. They'd stay up once I had my jeans on anyway, and hold the pad in place, which was all I needed them to do.
"B-But if someone…Comes…" She was whispering.
"Stay there." I shook my head. I'd washed my pussy in the sink, just using handfuls of water and drying myself with paper towels. And now I had fresh underwear, courtesy of Miss Haven. I put on my jeans and my boots, moving around the woman as she knelt obediently.
I took my briefs, damp with my wet dream, and gave them to Miss Haven.
"Stand up now, and put these on," she stared at me, licking her lips and nodded, her face once again burning with humiliation and I was learning to enjoy that a lot.
I watched as she pulled up my boy's underwear, white briefs that had been sort of tight on me and were much too small for her. "Wait," I stopped her when she had them halfway up her thighs. "Put this in there too," I grabbed my old pad, soaked with my cum and spotted with my blood, handing it to her delicately.
"Ohhh god…I can't…I'll…" she was shaking and holding my pad cautiously. It reeked of my sex with a rich musky odor and we could both smell it.
"Do it…" I told her in a soft commanding voice. "Do it or tell me you never want to see me again."
"Y-You can't…Leave me…" Miss Haven looked at me wide eyed and swallowed hard.
"I won't leave you," I promised. "As long as you obey me. Now do what I told you to."
I didn't yell or anything, remembering that Coach had never yelled at me. He didn't have to and I didn't think I did either. There was something better about someone being calm and rational and telling you to do something in a voice that made you want to do it. That's what I hoped I sounded like and I think I did, or at least Nurse Haven seemed to think I did.
I watched as she tried to stick the tape on the back of the pad to the briefs, but of course it wasn't very sticky anymore. So she had to hold it in place as she pulled up her new underwear carefully, pulling the briefs snug against her skin so that her flesh bulged a little around the legs and waistband. Nurse Haven wasn't fat by any stretch of the imagination, my underwear was just too small, but it looked incredibly sexy, even with her garters and now hopelessly skewed stockings.
I pressed my hand against her sex, feeling the wetness of the pad against her pussy, still soaked with her own recent orgasm. Miss Haven moaned and looked down at me and we just knew we wanted to kiss each other. It was a soft tender kiss too, with her delicate tongue playing lightly over mine. I could taste myself in her mouth and I rubbed her pussy hard, grinding my well used pad against her vagina until she was groaning.
"Wear that all day," I told her. "Don't take it off until you get home."
"Yessss…" Miss Haven sighed and I knew she wanted me to make her cum again but we'd been in there for a long time already.
"What time am I going to fuck you tomorrow?" I asked her, pressing my palm to her damp briefs.
"T-Ten…" she moaned, "…Fif…Fifteen…"
"Good," I kissed her again. "I won't be at football practice today," I suddenly remembered to tell her, "I'm going to see my girlfriends. Maybe I should tell them about you." I giggled a little and left her there, feeling like I'd just come out of a hurricane or something. My thoughts and emotions were so twisted and my body was still just a confusion of pleasure and excitement. Life was good!