Happy New Years!
This page is used for whatever I need at the moment and subject to change/deletion without prior notice.
A holiday message, from my family to yours...
Calatrava Christmas Party
Hi! I'd like to personally wish you and your loved ones nothing but joy and peace this holiday season. Though we live in difficult times and our days may sometimes seem a burden rather than a blessing, I've found much strength in the fellowship that writing and posting stories online has brought me. We are strangers perhaps, drawn together by a common interest and a kindred spirit; we are friends of convenience, comrades of the moment, some would say; we come and go, persistent as the first day of spring and equally frail. Did you imagine yourself immortal because you have loved beauty? The New Year is upon us and and I thank you for the old. I pray you will be safe and happy and prosperous in all your efforts; that each day will be new and wondrous and welcome to you and yours.
�rr (with a lot of Evie thrown in)
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Official Sexual Jihad Survey
The only place where you can see Evie's bare naked butt.
First things first, I started a new blog which really isn�t a blog. It�s my unofficial �Official Sexual Jihad Survey� in which I try to narrow down the list of suspects who are visiting my web site, reading my stories, and snickering behind my back.
That�s a long sentence.
I hope you�ll take the time to complete my survey just because it�ll be pretty embarrassing if nobody does it except me. You can find it here: http://rachaelross.blogspot.com/ and that should open in a new window. There�s only one page to it and I made it as a spur of the moment deal. It isn�t exactly well constructed nor the questions formulated in any sort of scientific method. Basically I just want to answer the questions we authors debate among ourselves in small forums when we wonder who the hell readers are.
We�re not smart enough to look in the mirror, but it is the perfect metaphor. Think about it.
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What else to editorialize on?
The Second Coming in Style
Christmas�I�m not a big Christmas person. I�m too catholic for it maybe, but the very idea of celebrating a pagan feast in the name of Jesus to the constant ka-ching of rampant capitalism irks me. You�re going to think I�m crazy, but I don�t think Jesus would be thrilled. On the other hand, even he might like to buy a Bugatti Veryon with all the t-shirts he could sell.
I don�t believe in a separation of Church and State either. The Muslims and I have that much in common. That confuses most Americans brought up to believe that our country was founded on Freedom of Religion. I�m not going to argue it either, so don�t bother emailing me and telling me how wrong I am. I believe you, but it won�t change my mind and I won�t reply to anything anyone has to say on the subject. I pose no threat to you and just wanted to express my opinion so people will understand me a little less.
I�m too literal. �One nation under God?� There�s only one way I can interpret that and the word �Freedom� isn�t part of the definition.
Yeah, it�s that time of year again; let�s talk about New Years instead. Passing a random spot in the great orbit around the sun should be celebrated with resolutions and I have a lot of them. Most of them don�t apply here, but some do.
I resolve to write a new chapter for �Babymaker� and I�ll write the third and final chapter of �The Dog Who Owned Me� and I�ll finish �Bestial Brother� all before the end of 2011�I�m resolved to do all those things. That�s like a promise. I�ll also try and finish whatever else I�ve left undone in my online erotica life.
Anarchy for Beginners
(aren't we all?)
I got �Anarchy for Beginners� up, did you see that? It�s my old blog (which is still on blogger, btw) in abbreviated format. I should tell you that the post about defending my doctoral thesis is NOT recent. I�ve had my Ph.D. for awhile now and it�s been a real money maker. Reading those old entries made me giggle, some of them.
Jeeze, I�m weird sometimes.
What I'm giving the man who has everything...Seriously.
Ahhh�Shucks. What else am I going to say here? I�ll be in the hospital most of January. In and out, I should say. They�re not going to keep me there, just make me carpool everyday. Anyway, I don�t anticipate getting a lot done for awhile. I�m hoping to get my last couple VBE pages finished and up soon. Being the holidays, I�m kind of busy doing other things as I�m sure you are. It�s why I worked so hard for the last month to get stuff up and provide some content to keep people busy for awhile.
Having a web site is a real pain sometimes. It�s never really finished. There�s always �One more thing!� to be done. I�m holding off on the third �update� until I get more of the site finished. I still need to edit and post some stories like �Dabara� and �Sorority Girl�, umm��Girl Trouble� as well, stories that I like a lot, but which were written back when my command of the English language was marginal at best. Some people would say it still is, but I don�t listen to them.
This is turning out to be one of those self-serving, whining sort of �I�m trying my best, Daddy!� posts, isn�t it? I hate those. I know why I do it too�I�m looking to stay focused and motivated. I have to push myself harder, that�s all. I�ve grown fat and lazy in my self-pity. I hate that. I�m better than that. There are things I need to do, so�Okay.
See ya later,
rache
Wait...I'm not done yet!
Here's a couple unused images from my VBE Science and Technology page. I'd planned on doing this whole gag about the US government spending millions of dollars (billions?) developing new anal lubricants for the astronaut program. get it? Ass-tronauts!! hahahahaha... I crack myself up. That seemed pretty lame after my buzz wore off, but I made the pictures anyway just because I had them and I've never been afraid to find new ways to fail. Hey! It's how stuff gets invented! So, anyway my SciTech page obviously went in a different "robotic" direction and the space-age huranus lubricant joke is now just a memory.
ATM Machines
(the picture I didn't use)
I love that scientist...He makes me laugh out loud every time. I think we all know a guy who looks just like him too.
The Curious Facts Department
"After the war is over�" Ahmed sighed.
"What?" I knelt behind him as he sat on the edge of the bed. My naked breasts felt good against his back, my chin on his shoulder and hands smoothing his muscular chest and stomach.
We were in a safe house in Israel, up two flights of dark stairs with the windows open. The heat was still oppressive less than an hour after sunset and the ceiling fan above the bed rattled incessantly. We'd finished our evening prayers, he and I and his two bodyguards going to the roof and facing towards Mecca on our prayer rugs. It had been a small risk as the city had a large enough Muslim population that none of the Jews who might see us would wonder; but a risk nonetheless and we were both happier to be closeted in our bedroom.
"I will never use one of these again." Ahmed turned his head to smile at me.
"You don't have to use it now," I whispered, scratching my cheek against his thin beard.
He held a foil packet in his fingers, a condom, and I paused him long enough for a kiss, opening my mouth for his tongue and holding the Syrian tightly. Ahmed was a handsome man, imaginative and smart and easy to love. I moved my right hand lower to find his uncircumcised penis, swollen and ready for me. We'd been lovers for less than a month, although we'd known each other for almost four and I sometimes teased him about being uncut. It was incongruous with his faith and a source of guilt for the man, but he seemed to draw strength from sin and Ahmed took my opinions well.
It had just taken me some time to persuade him of my sincere faith, both in Allah and himself.
"Temptress." Ahmed blew the word across my lips and his eyes were the color of honey.
"You'll marry me after the war," I reminded him, squeezing his cock and nibbling at his ear. "You've promised me ten children."
"Ten sons," he agreed. "Daughters do not count."Let's talk children...
According to the book The Two-Headed Boy, and Other Medical Marvels by Jan Bondeson the largest number of children born in a single birth was 365 to Margaret of Hennenberg after she was cursed for spreading rumors. It's quite safe to say that's just a legend. As for births that have actually been documented, according to the Guinness Book of World Records, the largest multiple birth was nine babies. This occurred in Sydney in 1971 but all the babies died. As for surviving multiples the highest I have heard of was octuplets (8) in America fairly recently (2004 or 2005) where only one of the children died.
Humans are one of the most populous living things on the planet so it comes as no small surprise that there is much diversity seen between us. Still, some things most people think are fixed really aren�t. This can be particularly apparent when it comes to biology and the family. For instance how many children can a couple conceive in one lifetime? How big was the largest infant ever born? How many children have been born in a multiple birth? How many children did the most prolific father in history have? The answer may surprise you!
Oral Contraception.
Ye Olde Time Pornography...Tis the Season, right?
The More the Merrier!
With the recent birth of a viable set of octuplets in the US, there is much talk about the largest families on record and what is actually biologically possible. You may be surprised to learn that this set of octuplets (and the set preceding it by another woman) are not the larges multiple births on record, nor are they the largest family or most fertile parents!
Most Multiples Born at once: The record for the multiples born at once first goes to the Broderick family of Australia who welcomed five boys and four girls into their family on June 13 1971. Sadly two of the boys were still born and the baby to live the longest only lasted six days.
The second set of nunuplets were born in Malaysia to Mat Saad on March 26, 1999. All these babies were born alive but none lasted more than six hours after birth.
Most Natural Children Born to One Woman: One of the most stunning records in history can go to one very fertile Russian woman who gave natural birth to sixty nine children without the use of fertility aids! The children were all born between 1725-1765. In twenty-seven pregnancies Mrs. Vassilet gave birth to sixteen sets of twins, seven sets of triplets, and four sets of quadruplets. Only two of these children died in infancy, a staggering statistic by itself considering the day and age!
Most Children Sired by One Father: Of course sixty-nine children by one mother is absolutely astonishing but what kind of family could a man have with no less than five hundred wives? Historians think Mulai Ismail sired somewhere around eight hundred children sometime in his life between 1646-1727 where he ruled as the last Sharifian Emperor of Morocco. Now that's a tiring thought!
Unique Infants
These newborns are sure to turn some head all on their own, without having half a dozen siblings lying aside them...
World's "Oldest Baby" - The world's "oldest baby" was born to twenty-five year old Beulah Hunter, who gave birth to a daughter at a staggering 375 days after conception. Normal gestation in human only last 280 days. Proof of this amazing gestation goes back to the original pregnancy test done in March 1944 and her last menstruation on February 10, 1944. The baby was a very normal six pounds and fifteen ounces. According to her prenatal doctors the baby had grown exceptionally slowly but was otherwise normal upon it's birth in 1945.
Worlds Heaviest Newborn: The world's heaviest newborn was a massive twenty-two pounds and eight ounces upon his birth in Italy, 1955. His mother Signora Carmelina Fedele was a woman of average size, as was his father.
World's Tiniest Surviving Premature Baby: Amillia Sonja Taylor, was born October 24, 2004 after a terribly impatient twenty-two weeks in the womb. She was just 9 and a half inches long and weighed less than ten ounces. She lived at the hospital for four months before growing big enough to take her first trip home.
The Oldest and Youngest Parents
If you ask a random person on the street what they believe the reproductive age of a woman is they will likely say that a girl can get pregnant in her teens and have her last baby in middle age... but what about the anomalies? These individuals can prove to be controversial or even disturbing to some... so what is the human reproductive age taking into consideration the youngest and oldest parents? You might be surprised...
Youngest Father on Record: The world's youngest father was a British boy by the name of Sean Stewart who was only twelve years old when his baby was born back in January 20, 1998. He was only 11 years and one month old when he got his then fifteen year old girlfriend pregnant.
Youngest Mother on Record: The world's youngest mother is one of the most disturbing records you will come across because the title for this goes to a Peruvian girl who gave birth when she was only five years old. Little Lina Medina gave birth by cesarean in 1939, the only way she could have physically survived with such tiny hips. She had been brought to the hospital from a tiny Andean village because she was believed to have been suffering a massive abdominal tumor. Some investigation revealed that Lina had started menstruating when she was only three years old and she even had fully developed breasts despite her very young age and typical size. The medical field today believes she probably had a pituitary problem which made her reproductive hormones spring into action far before they should have. As to who the father was? No one ever figured this one out. The baby boy was brought home and raised as her brother and only had one sibling, a brother born thirty three whole years later.
Oldest Father on Record: The oldest father is impressive for a lot of reasons. He was an Australian minor who entered into fatherhood for the last time when he was an amazing ninety three years old! Les Colley died a few years later at age 100.
Oldest Mother on Record: The oldest mother on record goes to sixty-seven year old Maria del Carmen Bousada de Lara who was blessed with twins on December 29, 2006, in Spain. Not surprisingly this wasn't a totally natural conception. This sparked worldwide controversy.My biological clock is ticking now!
That's just a cool pic I like.
Riva
Riva. That was her name. No more and no less. Just Riva and she'd picked me out of a lineup of the usual suspects on a Saturday night, taking me back to my place and fucking my brains out. I'm not a lesbian, but I'm not a flaming hetero by any stretch. I'm just me. Lying there in the afterglow I reached across her for a cigarette.
"You love anything?" she asked me in her high pitched European accent.
"I love you." I laughed at her and felt around the nightstand for my lighter.
"Do you hate anything?" She sounded annoyed, or as much as a 20 year old can after three or four good orgasms.
"I hate Yoko Ono." I fell back hard, just letting my body go so that the mattress bounced. We played footsie under the damp sheet while I lit my cigarette.
"I hate everything," she sighed, looking up at the darkness. I wanted to make love to her with the lights on, because Riva was the most beautiful person I'd ever seen, but she wanted the lights out.
"Everything?" I took a drag and my small room lit up orange.
"Everyfuckingthing."
"Even me?"
"Are you a thing?" She turned onto her side, her hand reaching out to hold my right breast, cupping it with spread fingers and squeezing.
"No."
"Then I won't hate you," she almost laughed. "Just the world."
"Fuck the world." I smoked. "We don't need it."
And then I put out my cigarette and we were making love again, because I believed that's what it was. Making love.
Back up.
I was a freshman and just waiting to be discovered. That's what it felt like and I'm sure you understand. Away from home finally, walking around the university campus and being amazed and shocked and pleased and frustrated at every turn. Every 19 year old thinks that they're destined for something great and we don't even have to look for it, greatness will find us. What found me was Riva.�
She was singing with a band in an underground club called, typically enough, The Basement. They played to the post-hip crowd, doing covers of old Meat Puppets, The Clash, and the English Beat. You haven't appreciated Straight To Hell until Riva sings it for you, accompanied by a 12 string guitar and a lethargic drummer. It's torturously beautiful and I wondered if I was in the right place.
I looked good for who and where I was. Kind of tall, but that was mostly my shoes. Short black hair, combed straight back behind my ears, streaked with blue so dark it just made the black seem to shine. A pretty face with good bones, or so photographer had told me once when I'd had thoughts of modeling, but he might have just wanted to fuck me. I had blue eyes, like they belonged to a blonde or something, bright and wholesome. I liked my eyes because they could were made for lying. I could say almost anything and my eyes would swear it was the truth.
Some guys were hitting on me cause it was that kind of place. You know, college. It was open season on girls and we didn't mind. Any girl dumb enough to go out by herself? She was just asking for it. I was down there practically begging.
"White Russian..." Riva was behind me as I stood at the bar, taking a break from the stage and getting something to drink. "You want something?" she asked and it took me a second to realize she was talking to me, mostly because I was busy talking to some guy named Ralph.
"What?" I turned my head, feeling her hand on my shoulder.
"Do you want something to drink?" she asked me slowly and the bartender was standing there waiting.
"Uh, whatever," I shrugged, turning back to Ralph and his barely clever innuendos, but he was cute anyway and...
"You don't need him." Riva was touching me again. "My dick's bigger than his anyway."
"Really?" I smiled at that, but I wasn't really sure if I should be amused or annoyed.
"Hey..." Ralph started saying, evidently not liking the interruption.
"What, you wanna step outside?" She leaned closer and I blinked because it looked pretty clear that this punked-out girl, who looked like she was 14 maybe, wouldn't have minded kicking Ralph's ass right about then.
Ralph didn't say anything, he just picked up his drink and walked away.
"See?" The young woman nodded. "I gotta do one more set and then we'll go to your place, okay?"
And that was how I ended up with Riva.
From the "True Good To Be True" files...
What I want stuffing my stocking. Actually, I'm going to buy one of these.
Thoughts on Vibrators
Once upon a time in my Gender and Communications class we had to turn in a paper on vibrators and the history of them. It sucks that there isn't as much in depth history about women as there are about men, but I was surprised and shocked at the evidence that I discovered while searching for a specific video clip on the internet. I didn't know the exact prompt of the essay because I accidentally missed class and I didn't get a chance to see the actual video that my classmates watched.
But when writing the essay I discovered something that can't be taught or shown really in a video; shame and embarrassment. I began wondering what it would be like for other girls in my class who weren't as open as I am, who didn't know how to handle the term "vibrator" being repeated in their papers; the bold title that everyone around them can see. I'm not ashamed, I'm actually proud to have written about the history of something that is so openly taboo as the ubiquitous female appliance and more importantly, the female orgasm.
I mean, that's the point, isn't it? We want to cum.
Advertising for vibrators a hundred years ago was widespread in national magazines aimed at women, but only because the device was marketed as a cure of sorts. Women who had hysteria, considered a female disorder if not an actual disease, were informed of the sexual release of vibrators could provide (though not explicitly) and went to their doctors for a ten minute therapeutic session.
The idea of female hysteria evolved as male society sought rationale for the apparent difficulty some women experience in achieving orgasm during sex because women weren't achieving orgasm during sex. Of course, the scientific method and serious enquiry into female sexuality by physicians of the Victorian age established beyond a doubt that female orgasm is unnecessary for conception. The male orgasm is all that matters. Male gratification continues the species, female gratification is contrary to the moral compass of social value.
Did the Virgin Mary climax at the moment of Immaculate Conception? Probably not. Western ideology is fixated upon the purity and innocence of the female form. Unlike the Renaissance with its plump women blushing in the delight of sexual rapture, we idealize cold, androgynous females whose sexuality is distant and untouchable. We are inventions of men.
It's completely ingrained in our social custom that a woman shouldn't be sexually expressive, thus there are no advertisements for vibrators in national magazines. Conservative family groups would be up in arms at the mere thought of it, yet we can show Dolce and Gabbana ads that have a woman on the ground, surrounded by men, looking like she's about to be or already has been gang raped. The most beautiful women by today's standards are victims at best and harlots at worst, most often simultaneously.
Personally, I'd much rather see advertisements about sexual liberation than sexual confinement, but that would take some time, some hefty lobbying, and a huge social change within our culture. It's all about control in our society and when it comes to sexual control, we're taught that it's the woman who must be restrained and protected from her unnecessary and self-destructive desires. Hysteria is alive and well despite all efforts to the contrary. From bra burning to Prozac Nation we've walked the fine path, dedicated ourselves to worshipping the male phallus. Viagra is advertised everywhere we look, unlike vibrators. Ever wonder why? Probably not, it isn't a question we encourage in this modern age of scientific marvel.
The female orgasm...Is it really the end of mankind?
True Confessions
This picture has an interesting history. I cut it out of a magazine (Vogue, I think) back in 2000,
my first year of college, and put it on my wall along with a whole bunch of other images.
I scanned it eventually and have kept it on my computer ever since. I collect stuff like that.The shoes cost around $270 dollars at Neiman's and I liked them a lot.
I never would have looked for them except for this advertisement.
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