Seek Him What Made Them Seven Stars
Waddie
Greywolf
Chapter 98
"A thriving middle class is the source of American
prosperity, not a consequence of it. The middle class creates
rich people, not the other way around." ~ Nick Hanauer
“A wise man on our planet named Voltaire once wrote, 'Present
opportunities are not to be neglected; they rarely visit us
twice.' We don't have a moment to lose if we're going to get
everything done by the time we must leave Retikki Prime and return
to our home planets,” Billy said and his family agreed. “Can you
and your Queen get away to spend some time with us this evening?”
he asked Bubba Ho-Tep.
“Yes, Master Billy, as long as we have our personal bodyguards, we
may exclude the priestly class. We often entertain without their
presence. We only require two guards to rest their concerns. Our
child and his surrogate parents have two of our most devoted
guards with them. The two we bring with us will gate with your
people to our small but beautiful agrarian planet known as
Ahwetoe-Menipata,” Bubba Ho-Tep replied.
“How will they know if it was you who sent your guards and our men
to gather your son, his surrogate family, and his guards?” Billy
asked.
Bubba Ho-Tep held up his hand to show the men his beautiful ring,
“I will entrust my two guards with this emerald ring I'm wearing
which bears my seal. They will know the bearer of the ring came
from me as my representative, and they will obey. They understand
they might be relocated at a moment's notice if I deem it
necessary to protect them and our child,” he explained.
“How many of my men should I send, Sire?” BiIly asked and
continued, “I would like to send my husband, Boomer, along with
two of my closest, bonded brothers, Balthazar and Clyde to
accompany your guards. They are superior beings who might further
reassure the expat members of your family we mean them no harm. I
assure you their beauty and calming effect will quell any fears or
anxieties they might have,” Billy asked.
“May I meet them, Master Billy?” Ho-Tep asked.
“Of course, your Majesty,” he replied. Billy sent out a tickle to
Balthazar and Clyde to join them. They appeared immediately
without using a gate. Bubba Ho-Tep's eyes grew larger. It was
obvious he was taken-aback by the large naked men standing behind
Billy. The men were wearing their full compliment of piercings and
never looked more ominous or handsome. Ho-Tep's eyes blinked as he
swallowed hard from his personal excitement and stunned
first-impression.
“They...they are breathtaking. Stunning!” the giant monarch
exclaimed.
“There's more, Bubba Ho-Tep,” Billy said, “Gentlemen! Clyde!
Balthazar! Would you please be so kind to fledge for us and his
majesty?” Billy asked.
In the blink of an eye Balthazar and Clyde grew-in their wings as
if it were an everyday occurrence. They were two of many older
angels trained to use the application by the younger set of angels
who were placed last in stasis. Billy thought it was much more
impressive, almost theatrical, to watch the men grow a huge set of
wings in less than a minute. After all, he mused to himself,
something of such a unique nature should be brought about and
announced by a touch of drama, and he never liked the idea of
leaving his wonderful wings in a stuffy old cloakroom. Having them
reside within his men's body in a dormant state meant they could
be utilized more swiftly and were always attached to their food
source to keep them healthy.
The first half-dozen times he and his older angels attempted the
application was somewhat of an ordeal, unpleasant, and painful;
however, they quickly adjusted, became used to the sensation, and
found it a much more satisfactory means of fledging. Several of
his family claimed it was like their bodies experienced a physical
ejaculation of great joy and passion. They only used the storeroom
for weapons and several other necessary items should an emergency
occur.
Bubba Ho-Tep stepped back in surprise and his eyes grew even
larger. Billy smiled, started taking off his western shirt,
grinned, winked, and nodded to Nick. Nick got the message and
removed his shirt. They both fledged at the same time using the
new application and growing their wings like Clyde and Balthazar.
The giant monarch looked on in amazement with an uneasy but
understandable mien bordering on fear and flight.
Randy looked the giant monarch in the eye, smiled, tickled the
base of his cerebral cortex, and marched into his brain with his
cowboy boots clomping on his nerve endings, << Have no
fear, Brother Ho-Tep. Them cowboy-angels are of my blood, my
brothers, and we wish you and your people no harm. No need to
entertain your last thought of kneeling before them, Sire. My
big brother and his posse don't represent no supreme being,
>> Randy sent and grinned. He reached out his small hand,
the giant took it, pulled Randy close to his side, and and nodded
his understanding.
“We have heard stories and our legends speak of great winged men
who were as intelligent as they were beautiful. It is said they
were able to do miraculous things and bring about peace and love
wherever they appeared. Are some of your men our forefathers or
religious leaders our priests tell stories about?” Bubba Ho-Tep
asked.
“Probably not, your Majesty, but perhaps we are a reasonable
analog of the ones in your legends as we seem to be able to equate
ourselves with a few of our own legends from our past. There are
other deities from Earth's legends who are still considered holy
and people pray to them daily. One of them, in particular, is a
quaint but lovable ancient Indian god, the Elephant deity Lord
Ganesha, who is almost always portrayed as riding on a mouse. Of
all the deities worshiped by several thousand different beliefs, I
think Lord Ganesha is the most charming of them all. Religions can
be as complicated as those who believe in them or as simple and
unassuming as those who accept them as wise and comfortable
companions to guide and help them better understand the greater
complexities of life. We represent no deity, but that doesn't mean
we don't have respect for those more advanced than us,” Billy
said, “An old saying on our world: 'Fools rush in where angels
fear to tread,' is not to be taken lightly,” he added.
“I am becoming comfortable with you and your family the more
personal exposure we have with each other, Maestro Billy. Your
choice of men and watchers as accompaniment to gather our hidden
personal household is acceptable to us, and you are right, our
people will look upon your winged men as messengers from one of
our many gods. If I might be so bold to suggest, you might
consider including two of your large Cat-men as guards. My people
worship cats and treat them with utmost dignity. They believe they
are endowed with great powers, and they might more comfortably
entrust themselves to them.
“Excellent choice, your Royal Highness. I am proud to say I have
six of them in my family. They are a recent gift from Boomer and
my great uncles, the Lord High Chancellors of Retikki prime, and
we are quite taken with them. Bossman Randy, gate to our people
and quietly gather Locard and Grady McFee. Also, ask General
Boynton to accompany you. I would feel a bit safer if we have
another large Watcher to add to our away team. It would also be
good training and an unusual life experience a leader of our
military should witness to widen his perspectives,” Billy said and
smiled at Randy.
“I don't know about that, Big Bro, he eats so much, ever' time I
walk behind him he already has such a wide perspective I can't see
around him,” Randy said and giggled like a school boy. The rest of
Billy's posse broke into laughter. Billy couldn't help himself and
laughed, too.
“Why do you think I gave him the cognomen of General Heavy-Drop?
I'll leave the door open on that one, Bossman,” Billy said and
laughed again.
* * * * * * *
Everyone knew Billy and his immediate family were summoned for a
private meeting with the Pharaoh, Boa-Baleen Ho-Tep. Randy opened
a gate and walked through. He sought out and found the General and
Baug with their two sons, Roy and Lem, standing with his greater
family of the Boynton/Halfablap-Daniels clan in the vast gardens
of the Palace. With them were a clowder of Cat-men, the six
brothers who seemed to gravitate to the Boynton/Halfablap side of
the family. They were well away from everyone else to share a
moment of privacy and chat about their day.
The men and Cat-men were gathered under the large canopy of a
beautiful 'Woo-bang' tree enjoying some treats. Its leaves were an
impressive dark-green color with large golden, gourd-like fruit,
when ripe, detached from the mother plant and made a loud 'woo'
sound as it fell like a warning for anyone near to move out of its
way. When the pods hit the ground, they would exploded loudly to
scatter its seeds as far as possible. People were warned to turn
their backs on a falling pod. It exploded with such great force it
could damage an eye; however, the gathered fruit was very sweet
and satisfying to eat. It looked very much like a Banyan tree
without the adventitious prop roots.
“Oh, Dear Lord, save us!” the General exclaimed with a twinge of
humor while rolling his eyes, “When the Bossman's by his'self and
walking with such determination, you can bet chore' lunch-money
he's come to gather somebody for his big brother,” General Boynton
said, and everyone laughed. He said it loud enough Randy could
hear his comment.
“He's got his eyes on you. You're doomed, Dad,” Roy said.
“Go for the throat, Bossman!” Lem loudly urged Randy and everyone
laughed at the two young men.
“Naw, Brothers, I done got my sights on that big fine-look'n
military-ass of yore' dad's. He's got enough, I don't think he'd
miss much to satisfy this buckaroo's sweet-tooth,” Randy shot back
and leveled the playing field. “He also just happens to be right
about me being here,” he added.
“What can we do for you and your master, Bossman?” General Boynton
asked.
“Well, sir, we done got us an away-mission brew'n, traveling to
another world in another galaxy to rescue a one month old baby
boy. The special thing about this baby is, he's the child of Bubba
Ho-Tep and his wife, but they managed to keep her pregnancy and
Baby Bubba's birth a secret from their religious cast. Baby Bubba
was born with a pointed head and a tiny brain because of too much
inbreeding within the royal family. They fear if they're found
out, and the religious cult concludes the Pharaoh can't give birth
to a normal heir, there's a good chance them fanatic religious
leaders will rise up and depose Bubba Ho-Tep and his queen,” Randy
gave a brief rundown of the situation, how Billy and his men
checked their royal blood, and confirmed the worst. Their chances
of having a normal child is quite low.
Randy continued, “What we got here, Gentlemen, is a hide the
football and run for the goal posts situation so's if the
religious faction gets suspicious and starts to investigate, they
won't find diddly-squat. We need us another big watcher with a
spacious one bedroom crawl-in-pouch to protect and keep Baby
Ho-Tep hidden until we can safely get him back to Earth with us,
and we got time to refurbish him,” Randy said, “Now, don't hold me
to that plan. You know how my big brother works and anything I say
is subject to change in a moment's notice,” he added and got a
laugh. They knew Billy well.
“Oh, yes, and you Locard and you Grady,” Randy said pointing to
the two giant Cat-Men, “Bubba Ho-Tep done asked for two of our
Cat-Men brothers to join the away-team. It seems you men are
considered gods to them common folks, and Bubba Ho-Tep thought
they might be more likely to cooperate with us without panic,”
Randy explained.
“How do you know I'm Locard, and he's Grady, Bossman? Very few
humans can tell us apart,” Locard asked Randy.
“Your left ear twitches and your testicles swell when I come
around you men, and Grady is never more that six feet away from
you at any time. Grady has a cowlick in his fur below his right
ear where you lick him to wake him every morning and purr him to
sleep at night,” Randy replied and got a laugh from the men. “Why
are you asking? My sister,and most of ma' brothers is pert-dang
good telling you men apart. I ain't near as good as Jack, here. He
can recognize ever' one of you, and he's never wrong,” Randy
added.
“I'm asking your help to understand why me and my brothers are so
unusually disturbed because we are so irrationally strongly drawn
to you, your sister, Kayla, and all the Daniels children,
including Jack, Jenny, and Lem. We find you almost irresistible to
congregate and be with to share your thoughts and ideas. It
doesn't seem to happen when we're around the stranded children.
That's why we prefer to hangout with the Boynton/Halfablap clan.
Most of us, Grady excluded, held great reservations about coming
to Earth to become a part of Master Billy's family; however, you
children were the first and strongest draw to make us feel wanted
and appreciated. You treat us like we're your valued friends and
equals, but there's something about you in particular which leaps
the boundary of self-regulation and passes over into the area of
unnatural physical yearnings.
“We ain't sounding a sexual, deviant-species, pervert alarm. We
have no urge to have sex with you, but when you come around, our
usual senses of well-being and natural state is upended, and we
internally, physically and mentally, turn to kits again. You seem
to reduce us to our kitten-hood days and our minds become confused
beyond reason. We can only imagine running, playing with you,
chasing balls of twine to find out where it ends, and rubbing our
larger bodies against yours to take your physical aroma away from
you and wear it for a while. Have you ever noticed we purr a lot
more around you children than the adults?” Locard asked firmly.
“Hosanna! In the name of some unknown god, it works! I told you it
would!” Randy exclaimed to his sister, and the other children
laughed.
“Randy, you can be painfully awful and horribly inconsiderate
sometimes at the expense of other folk's innocence. There's
nothing worse than playing a dirty trick on newcomers to our
family who don't have a clue about your shenanigans,” Kayla
admonished Randy, and shook her forefinger at him; however, she
couldn't help grin just a bit because her little brother was
caught red-handed.
“If I'm so damn awful, why are you grinning like a Cheshire Cat,
Dear Sister?” Randy asked and got a laugh from the men. The other
children laughed at their exchange even harder. They were
following the conversation like a tennis match from one to the
other and back again. They didn't want to miss a word. “You're
right! The jig is up! I done had my fun. I guess it's time I went
and let them big Bubba-cats out of the bag. You have my permission
to tell them how rotten your little brother is, Sis,” Randy said.
“I hope you wonderful, gentle Cat-Men can find it in your hearts
to forgive my incorrigible little brother. He's been running an
experiment, and he made us kids swear to keep his secret to
ourselves. Our grandmother has a rather large greenhouse off the
back of our ranch house, and she grows vegetables year-round,
herbs, and spices of all kinds for cooking. One of the herbs she
grows is 'Cat-nip.' After it matures, she harvests it, dries it,
and sews it into small bags of old linen for our cats to play
with. They love it! It makes them go crazy doing funny things.
They take it to their beds and sleep with it at night. They do
unusual and funny things, and like you observed, they feel like
kittens again for a while.
“My little brother, got the bright idea to take an old bottle of
aftershave our dad used called Lilac Vegetal and poured it over a
handful of dried cat-nip leaves to release the oils to mix with
the Lilac oils and create Lilac Cat-nip Vegetal. He splashes-on a
handful each morning on his face, neck, and his arms. He passes
his scent on to us by handshakes, hugs, or pats on the back. You
probably don't find it as strong an appeal with the rest of us
kids as you do Randy,” Kayla explained.
The men in the group couldn't help find Randy's experiment
hilarious and laughed their asses off. Cowboys love outrageous
stories of putting one over on someone in a sly and mysterious
manner. The big Cat-Men found a certain humor in the respect it
was something the young boy thought of to impress them of his
interest and empathy for them being alone on a new world and
trying to find a common ground to gain better communication
between them. They considered Randy went to some trouble to see if
he could make them feel more at ease and learn to enjoy themselves
among the humans.
They came to look upon Randy's action as an amusing effort to
prove his admiration for them, and they were deeply moved. They
also soon learned the joys of raw, unadulterated small bags of
cat-nip herb. They became much more mellow cats. Things settled
down. The Cat-Men were relieved they did nothing wrong, and their
erratic feeling were not their fault. They could more easily cope
with the situation once it was explained to them and they
understood there definitely was a reason behind their strange
behavior.
* * * * * * *
“So Master Billy's agreed to help adjust Pharaoh Ho-Tep and his
Queen's DNA so's they can have normal children without worry?” the
General asked.
“Yes, sir, but they's more'n 'nat at stake. My brother's bond with
them is, our family agrees to take the family what is taking care
of Baby Bubba and their four special guards into our family. Then
we make adjustment to Mr. and Mrs. Ho-Tep ASAP so's they can try
baby-make'n-one-oh-one again – all before we leave Retikki Prime.
So we're working on a tight schedule,” Randy explained
seriously.
Royce Boynton broke up laughing. “I ain't never seen me no
wheeler-dealer smoother than our young master,” he said, “For
little more than his gifts, an opportunity opens itself to give
him the final strength he needs to bring about major change on our
planet. If we pull this off, and I ain't got me no doubt we will,
Billy Daniels will have an incredibly powerful political ally in
his hip pocket. If I know him, and I think we do, Billy will make
Bubba Ho-Tep and his wife a part of his family. He will raise the
Pharaoh's first born son as a fully fledged Cowboy-Angel – a
valued member of our family,” he said, slapped his knee, and
laughed. Everyone around him laughed with the General and shook
their heads in disbelief Billy could be so fortunate. “Are they
waiting for us?” the General asked.
“Yes, Sir, but I ain't happy about a couple of things I thought
I'd run by you men, General,” Randy said and looked a bit
unnerved.
“What? Tell us what chu' got on yore' mind, Son,” Royce urged
Randy gently.
“My big brother plays a good ball game, but sometimes he don't
cover all his bases. He ain't considered no one what's going on
the mission can speak the old Egyptian language. Them folks is
gonna' be scared half-to-death with Cowboy-Angels, big Watchers,
and our humongous but handsome Cat-Men descending on them. Them
Ho-Tep guards he's sending won't do us no good. The family and the
guards tongues were removed, and they were made deaf,” Randy said
almost on the verge of tears.
“Jesus H. Christ! They done that to them poor folks?” Royce asked
with disgust.
“They don't know no better, Brother Heavy-drop,” Randy said
quietly, “… but that ain't all, they cut the penises off their
family guards, but left their testicles so's they would still be
big and strong to protect them – all in the name of fear and
religion,” Randy added.
“Don't tell me no more, Son. That's enough for me to class them as
undesirables,” Royce said angrily.
“Granted they ain't got the best track record, General, but what
society does? H'it t'weren't too long ago, man still practiced
human sacrifice and some religions still believe in killing those
what don't believe in the same myths and superstitions they do. I
got me a strong feel'n they can learn by example. If we can get
our act together, maybe we can teach them a better way. Several
have voiced opinions they suspect the Etheropteans are on the
border of a quiet social revolution. If they look and see life can
be different, and are shown a better way, perhaps we can become a
strong influence for them,” Randy said.
“We can only hope, Son, but that means we gotta' get our shit
together first. It don't matter much if we ain't progressed passed
the human sacrifice only to starve poor folks to death because of
austerity programs so's the rich can become more wealthy and
powerful,” the General replied. “Murder for any reason is still
murder,” he added.
“I can speak the old Egyptian language, Randy,” Lem interrupted
the conversation, “as a matter of fact, several of our family have
the ability. Before we came to Retikki Prime, I spent five
afternoons with Jack, Jenny, Lieutenant Roy Boynton, and Captain
Bart Langstrom sitting under the cloud chambers learning the
language from me while I recorded it into Seth's memory banks for
posterity. Since they been enhanced, they're learning abilities
have skyrocketed. They can converse in the language as well as I
can. They are talented mentats as well,” he added.
“Excellent! The three of you, Lem, Jack, and Jenny come with me.
Lieutenant Roy, Captain Bart, and General Heavy-drop come along,
too,” Randy said.
“Wait a minute! They don't go anywhere without me!” Baug spoke
strongly like the ultimate protector waving his forefinger back
and forth and shaking his big hairy head. Randy could only think
of how handsome and sexy Baug was now that he was pregnant with
the General's son. He exuded an aura about him which was almost
spooky and made him look like a saint from old books Randy found
in a trunk in one of the barn's storage rooms.
“Aaww, Hell! We might as well make it a damn family affair. Come
Baug! Colonel Halfablap, you come with your husband and
grandchildren,” Randy said, and everyone seemed satisfied they
were included. Colonel Hank Halfablap smiled to himself as Randy
opened a gate to take them to the Bubba Ho-Tep Pow-wow. He thought
Randy was the penultimate image of a young West Texas Hill Country
Cowboy as Hank watched the young cowboy hook his strong right arm
with his new brother, Jack, whom he fully supported in his choice
to make the change. It was Randy's invitation for them to walk
through the gate together as equals leading the rest. Hank
couldn't have been more proud of them boys. He took a deep breath
and let out a peaceful sigh which didn't go unnoticed by his
fellow military brothers.
* * * * * * *
Locard and Grady were walking behind Randy and Jack. Just before
they were to walk through the gate, Grady looked at his brother
and grinned wickedly. They nodded in agreement, and each big
Cat-man picked up one of the boys. Grady gabbed Jack, and Locard
grabbed Randy. They pulled up their cowboy shirts while the boys
yelled and squirmed in the big Cat-Men's massively muscular arms,
placed their soft mouths and tickling whiskers to their bellies
and blew like they were blowing the last trumpet before eternity.
Randy and Jack were laughing and hollering when they came through
the gate into the conference room. Everyone stopped their
conversations and were astonished at the chaotic arrival of the
rest of the necessary posse.
It certainly was an ice-breaker, and put a more societal-family
feeling on a very serious meeting. Bubba Ho-Tep was amused and
seemed to have a heavy burden lifted from his shoulder. Somehow
the jubilant entry of Master Billy Daniels clan, like a hot knife
of truth cauterizes smarting flesh, instilled in him the gentle
loving camaraderie which was the hallmark of the Daniels dynasty.
He never felt more wanted and at-home with another group of
people. It was a new and wonderful experience for him.
“Report, Bossman!” Billy said loudly, and the men came to order.
“Yes, sir, Master, sir,” Randy came to stand at attention, “I
gathered a few more than you requested, but I think you will find
there is method in my madness, sir!” Randy said firmly, still at
attention.
“I'm listening, Bossman!” Billy barked like a hard-nose Marine
D.I. as he paced back and forth in front of the gathered men and
two Cat-Men.
“Colonel Boynton is here at your request, sir. Undoubtedly, in his
Watcher form, he would be the best candidate for operation 'Hide
the Football,' sir, to carry it over the goal-line without
suspicion from the opposing team!” Randy reported crisply.
“Fine! Fine! Private Bossman! Glad someone took the initiative to
give this 'operation' a code name. Was that your decision or did
your brothers and sister contribute?” Billy asked sternly.
“It was a general consensus, Master Billy,” Randy said, and winked
at his brothers and sisters.
“Good! Good! Every successful operation needs cooperation and a
code name. Now, other than the General, and the two Cat-Men,
Locard and Grady, why are these others here?” Billy asked.
“Among those who will make up the away-team you planned to send on
'Operation Hide the Football,' who can speak the old Egyptian
language and converse with the Ho-Tep child's new parents and
their household guards to explain why an away-team has been sent
to gather and relocate them?” Randy asked.
A blank look came over Billy's face, and he dropped his hard-ass
Drill-Sergeant-persona for a minute. “Good question, Bossman! Damn
good question, Son! In the confusion and conversation, your Master
forgot the minutiae of our task, but that's why I have you as my
Aide-de-camp to keep me straight and on target. Right, Private
Bossman?” Billy asked firmly.
“Oh, Sweet Jesus! Will you never learn? You know better'n to set
that kid up like that!” he heard Nick say nervously under his
breath like Billy just took his life into his own hands.
“I don't know about the 'straight' part, sir, and while we been
guilty of camp'n it up a bit from time to time, I'll agree it's my
job to keep you focused and on target, sir!” Randy said and
grinned wickedly. He knew he shot Billy's serious-legs out from
under him. The rest of the audience laughed loudly. Billy couldn't
help it and joined them, but quickly regained his authority.
“All right! So what do you have for your Master, Private Bossman?”
Billy asked more considerately.
“Take your pick, Master. Lem Boynton, Lieutenant Roy Boynton,
Captain Bart Langstrom, Cowboy Jack Rigby, and Miss Jenny
Robertson can communicate fluently in the ancient tongue, and as
you know, they're accomplished mentats, sir. They spent everyday
last week learning from Lem as he allowed Seth to record his
knowledge of the ancient language for posterity,” Randy reported.
“Excellent! So who among them would you choose to enhance our
away-team, Bossman?” Billy asked.
“Buckaroo First Class Lem Boynton and Cowboy Jack Rigby, Master
Billy. Their youth automatically makes them less threatening than
large officious adults. It wouldn't hurt none to send the
Lieutenant and Captain as backups, sir, but let Lem and Jack do
the talking,” Randy said.
“I'm surprise you didn't find some argument for you to go on this
away-mission, Bossman,” Billy said.
“I'd love to go, but I'm satisfied to remain here and root for the
home team. They won't be gone very long anyway with the time
differentiation; besides, I don't think I could stand to watch my
mother skin you alive for letting me go on an away-mission without
her consent,” Randy replied.
“Excellent point, Bossman, and I fully agree. I'm glad to see
you're learning to take some responsibility in these matters,”
Billy said.
Bubba Ho-Tep stood in awe at the way Billy handled the situation
with a demand for respect and seriousness, but with a level of
mirth, understanding, and encouragement. The more he was around
the Daniels clan, the more he came to admire and appreciate them.
Billy wasted no time having the General remove his western clothes
and again surprised Pharaoh Ho-Tep by morphing into a huge Watcher.
The final away-team included Boomer; the General as a heavy-drop
Watcher; two Cowboy-Angels, Balthazar and Clyde; the two Cat-Men,
Locard and Grady; Lem Boynton; Jack Rigby; Lieutenant Roy Boynton;
and Captain Bart Langstrom.
Of course, there were the two giant Ho-Tep family guards who led
the procession through the gate Randy opened from the coordinates
supplied by Pharaoh Boa-Baleen Ho-Tep. The away team's
instructions were to appear in the secluded section of the summer
palace on the planet Ahwetoe-Menipata. The two large Ho-Tep guards
were the first to transverse the gate, followed by the smaller
human children, the adult humans, the Cat-Men, the two
Cowboy-Angels fully fledged and finally the two large, handsome,
well-groomed Watchers. Billy gave Randy instructions to close the
gate, and the away-team were on their own. Billy had faith in his
men they would be returning soon.
* * * * * * *
Ahwetoe-Menipata
There was no one around when the guards from Boa-Baleen Ho-Tep and
their company emerged through the gate from Retikki Prime. The
guards clapped their hands loudly to get the attention of the
other guards already stationed with the elderly man and women
entrusted with the Pharaoh's son, Baby Ho-Tep. Soon enough they
came to peek around a door. They saw their brother-guards and came
into the room to see what was going on. They seemed curious but
wary about the strange people accompanying them; however, the
sight of the young humans seemed to quell any greater fears. They
reasoned whomever they represented wouldn't send children on an
aggressive assault. The larger of the two guards opened his hand
to show them the emerald ring the Pharaoh gave him before they
departed. The two guards recognized it immediately, fell to their
knees, and bowed deeply to the strange gathering of unusual
people. The leading guards, turned and bowed to the away-team too.
The large guard handed Captain Langstrom the emerald ring. They
turned, fell to their knees, and joined their brothers with their
heads almost touching the floor.
<< Come Jack we have work to do, >> Lem sent
to Jack Rigby. << You remember how we were shown to
turn-on someone's mentat abilities, Brother? >> he
asked.
<< I do, Brother Lem. You take the men on the left side,
and I'll take those on the right, >> Jack replied.
The two young cowboys slowly walked to the kneeling guards. Jack
knelt next to the first one, placed his fingers to the base of his
cerebral cortex and gently rubbed the area and sent him a message.
<< If you can hear me, tell me your name, Proud Warrior,
>> Jack sent in perfect ancient Egyptian.
The guard shuddered like a chill ran up his spine, and after he
relaxed, he replied, << I am called Seth, Master,
>> he responded.
<< Seth is a good name. I have a friend on my home
planet named Seth. I hope I will get to introduce you to him
someday, >> Jack said and moved to the guard behind
him.
Once the two young cowboys turned-on the guards' telepathic
abilities, they rejoined their group.
<< What now, my Brother? >> Bart Langstrom
sent to Lem.
<< Put the ring on the middle finger of your right hand,
Captain. When I give the signal we will all clap our hands
together once. They will stand from their bow. After they stand,
Captain, hold up your hand with the back to them and spread you
fingers to show them you wear the ring, you have the power of
the Pharaoh's word, and they are to obey you, >> Lem
sent to Bart. << The rest of our team hold up your right
hands, palm forward with your fingers spread. It is the
universal greeting on their world which signifies you come in
peace, you have no weapon, you mean them no harm, and you are
not hiding anything in your hands, >> Lem sent to
Bart.
The away mission did exactly what Lem told them, and everyone
stood together. “The ball is in your court, Captain Langstrom.
They are mentat-primed, and we should be able to move operation
'hide-the-football' along with few problems.
<< Can you proud warriors hear me? >> Bart
sent in the ancient language. The guards smiled, looked at each
other, and shook their heads in affirmation. << No! No!
Use your mind to reply, Seth, >> Bart sent.
Seth looked around to his brothers. He saw they could hear and
urged him to speak for them, << Yes, Master, we hear you
well, sir, >> he replied.
<< Good! It's what we want, so you won't have any fear of
us. We are here to collect the man and woman taking care of the
Pharaoh's son. Can you lead us to them or bring them to us? We
wish to feed the baby and take him, his caretakers, and you men
back to Retikki Prime as quickly as possible, >> Bart
sent.
The guards seemed to be happy they might not have to continue
living in such a distant outpost of the kingdom. The two guards
stationed on the small planet to oversee the planet looked
like they were about to panic. They shook their heads and got a
horrible frightened look on their faces as they turned and went to
get them. They quickly returned almost dragging the older couple
and stood before Captain Bart. He raise his hand to show them he
was wearing their master's ring, and they must obey him. The man
and woman in their late forties fell to their knees with their
heads almost touching the floor.
“Do your thing, Buckaroos, to key their mentat-abilites,” Bart
said aloud to Lem and Jack. They did as Bart commanded, and pretty
soon, the older couple stood. They looked only a little better.
<< Can you hear my thoughts? >> Bart asked
them in the ancient language, and they shook their heads 'yes,'
<< Now confirm you can send your thoughts to me, by
saying 'We can hear you, Master Bart!' >> Bart
demanded without nuance.
They looked at each other and nodded, then replied his sentence in
unison. << We can hear you, Master Bart! >>
they looked at each other and smiled at the novelty of being able
to hear and communicate with another person after years of being
rendered mute and deaf.
<< What is wrong here? Why are you folks so frightened?
>> Bart asked.
<< We know you men have come for the child, Master, but
he died only a short while ago. We did our best to take care of
him, but he developed an allergy to our only source of milk from
the Jukerlund herd. We tried everything else, but we could find
no other resource. We were warned against bringing in a wet
nurse for him who might be feeding another child in the village.
Now he is dead, and we fear for our lives, Sire, we swore to
protect him, >> the husband sent to Bart.
<< We'll worry about that later, but have no fear. You
have my word. I promise, as the representative of your Pharaoh,
you will neither be punished nor put to death. Take us to the
child immediately! There is no time to waste! We will explain
why we are here after we take care of the wee-bairn.
>> Bart sent, but didn't bother to translate the term
'wee-bairn.' He intuitively surmised it might be a term which
could be understood without translation, and the Captain was
right. Bart Langstrom was right about a lot of things. When he
went into his Captain persona, he was not to be challenged. Bart's
word was his gold standard. Captain Langstrom slowly, but
unassumingly, was becoming a brilliant leader and a 'take-charge'
kind of warrior who could be stern and demanding while exuding a
great deal of trust, empathy, and understanding at the same time.
Bart's growth and his outstanding displays of leadership didn't go
unnoticed by the soon to be leader of the World, General Royce
Boynton.
* * * * * * *
They found the child in a small, handmade, unadorned cradle
wrapped in swaddling clothes lying in a manger. It was a stunning
visual scene which couldn't be appreciated without recalling a
biblical passage in the New Testament repeated every year at
Christmas. In a pen nearby which opened to the outside stood two
animals what looked like two Lamas or Alpacas with small horns
about eight inches long, sticking straight up, with a rounded knob
on top. They had large brown eyes with long lashes and pursed
lips. The animals reminded Captain Langstrom of a cross between
Prince, Oriental whores, and Benny Boys who roamed the back alleys
near a slum street in Honolulu – 'shit' street, they called it.
When they had the money, they drank in the bars looking for a
trick – a paying customer for sex. Most of their trade were
military men on a one night pass from the VA hospital who were
recovering from combat in the oil wars in the Middle East. They
snuffed, farted, turned their backs on the crowd, and continued to
eat their food. Each female had a small, cute Jukerlung baby
trying their best to suck on their mother's teats.
Bart wasted no time and grabbed the small bundle and opened it.
The baby was almost reduced to a small bag of bones and the pallor
of his skin was pasty blue-white in color. The Captain noticed a
small two inch gold Ankh tattooed or embossed onto baby Ho-Tep's
left arm. He wondered if the shock or an infection might have
contributed to the child's death. He didn't have time to consider.
His mind went into overdrive and kicked into his
Marine-on-a-mission mode. Bart turned and took the child to a
large wooden table in the center of the room. “Come, Brother
Balthazar, breathe lightly into the bairn until we can fledge and
get set up around the table!” Bart ordered and everyone responded
like well-made cogs in a large contraption to bring a valued child
back to life.
Balthazar and Clyde took turns gently breathing into the babe as
Lieutenant Roy Boynton and Captain Bart Langstrom quickly removed
their cowboy shirts, hung their hats on a nail on a post, and
immediately fledged to their cowboy-angel personas. The gathered
guards and the old couple were so flabbergasted they were stunned
beyond belief. They looked at each other and began to kneel, but
Bart gave them a stern look, shook his head, and urged them to
rise with the open palm of his hand moving upward. They understood
his message and didn't question him. They stood up again.
“Boomer and Locard, stand behind me! H.D. you and Grady move
behind your boy on the other side! Cowboy Jack, you're by my side!
Lem, we need balance! Will you be so kind to join them uglies on
the other side!” Captain Langstrom barked and giggle at his last
comment. It was so out of context the others laughed with him.
<< You four guards – two on each end with one of the
surrogate parents between you! Hurry! >> he sent to
the them and remarkably, they responded to his orders without
hesitation.
Bart looked across the table and spoke, “I know you have more
experience with this sort of situation than me, Brother Balthazar.
We have our power and batteries in place and there is distributive
balance around the table. At this point, would you please do us
the honor and take over this exercise to save this child, sir?”
Bart asked with every fiber of admiration and respect he could
muster.
“Sorry, Captain, you don't need my services, nor does your rank as
a military officer compel me to do so, sir,” Balthazar said
without nuance, winked at him, and grinned.
“I don't understand, sir. I just drew a blank. Please explain,”
Bart answered about to panic.
“Son, h'it's just the Cowboy-Angel's way of telling you, he thinks
you done reached the rank of Cowboy-Angel Foreman First-class.
You've earned your bars and stars, and he's got full trust you
will pull a rabbit out of that big cowboy hat of yorn' and get the
job done cleanly and swiftly. What better chance for you when you
got two of the most mature Cowboy-Angels to back you up and catch
you if you fall. I'm with them. I just recently come on board with
this family. With a situation like this my stars don't mean diddly
shit. I just happened to pick the right door on life's
price-is-right conundrum and got awarded a leg up on DNA exchanges
and a different refurbishing technique. I done watched you develop
over the years, and you're ready. I know your strength and
determination. I know damn-well you ain't gonna' fail. There's too
much to lose on a much larger scale. Furthermore, I ain't never
bet on a horse unless I'm ninety-nine percent sure he's a winner.
This is your moment to shine, Cowboy. Step up to the plate and
knock one out of the park, Captain Langstrom! You can do it! I
promise, once you ride this bull, you'll never think about that
damned-old rusty rodeo belt-buckle again,” General Heavy-drop said
firmly.
“Hosanna!” shouted Lem
“Hosanna, in the highest!” shouted the rest of the men, Cat-Men,
Watchers, and Cowboy-Angels.
Bart and the other fledged Cowboy-Angels raised their wings to
make a tent over everyone standing around the table. Clyde handed
the baby to Bart across the table. The Captain took the wee-bairn
from Clyde and gently blew a breath of air from his lungs and
watch his fragile chest fill, only to collapse again. As healing
power was being gathered from the ethos, Bart continued to breathe
into the baby's lungs. While the tiny boy-child's skin began to
look more pink than blue, they still couldn't get a response from
him.
Finally, Bart laid the infant down, placed the heel of his hands
on top of each other and gently massaged Baby Ho-Tep's little
chest. He tried and tried, but didn't seem to be getting any
response. He would alternate and give the little fellow another
lung full of fresh air. The power was gaining and the living
batteries were almost fully charged, when suddenly there seemed to
be an unexpected power surge. It was so powerful it made everyone
clench each other's hand almost to the point of pain; however,
they stood strong together, and remembered Bart's instructions for
them not to break the circle around the table. They neither broke
the chain nor let their handsome Captain down.
Bart leaned over and spoke to Baby Ho-Tep, “I know you're with us.
I can feel you standing on this table, Little One, watching me.
You ain't left us. You're too damn hungry – hungry for good food
and a full, untroubled life, but you gave up just a mite too soon.
This is not a game, Son. I know you can hear my voice. Now do what
the good Captain tells you and get back into your body. It will be
a bit painful at first, but I promise, there will be no more
hunger. We brought a never ending supply of wonderful Watcher milk
for you – the sweetest milk in the universe – and we will see to
it, you will never know another minute, hour, or day of hunger.
You will be fed and filled with the goodness you so greatly
deserve, and while I certainly don't deserve the honor, you will
become my Little Brother, and a new family member to several of us
around this table. Now listen to my voice and do what your Captain
tells you. Breathe, my Brother! Breathe! Take one good breath and
our healing power will start your motor again. That's all you have
to do, Cowboy!” Bart said firmly like he was determined and
wouldn't take 'no' for an answer. The handsome Cowboy-Angel gave
one more push with his hands, and breathed into the babe's lungs
again. This time the baby sputtered, coughed, and spit out some
vile looking, blue-green soured milk. Then all Hell broke loose as
Baby Ho-tep's heart started, and his small meat-computer came back
on-line. He began to scream, cry, and move his tiny arms and legs
about to protest his discomfort, fear, hunger, and pain.
Boomer came to Bart, put his arm around him, kissed him gently on
his forehead, and smiled. “You look like you's frazzled, Cowboy.
After that performance, I dare say you got a right to feel that
way. Balthazar was right. That old angel knows what he's talk'n
about. Ain't no two ways about it, you were the right Cowboy-Angel
for the job. Ain't seen me no better work, Captain Langstrom. My
husband couldn't do no better, Son,” Boomer said, and the baby
stopped crying, began to focus his little eyes, and suddenly
started squirming in Bart's arms like a worm in hot ashes.
“I think he smells supper, Boomer, and he cain't wait to get to
it,” Bart said and grinned.
“Here! Let me have him. I'll pump some high-octane Watcher fuel
into his little tank, and he'll be back on the road burn'n rubber
like a rude buckaroo in a four-wheeler on his way to grow'n-up to
become another Daniels Cowboy-Angel,” Boomer said and
grinned.
The four guards and the older couple who kept the royal baby were
overwhelmed by what they witnessed, and they were all the more in
awe of the strange group of men who came upon them so
unexpectedly. They were almost sure they were holy beings, but
they seemed so good hearted, thoughtful, and easily approachable;
not at all overbearing condescending dick-heads. The gods they
were taught to worship could be peevish, petty, selfish, and
hateful tricksters, who rarely answered the prayers of the lower
casts. The more wonders the strange group of men performed, the
more they liked them and secretly wanted to become a part of their
family. They walked up to watch Baby Ho-Tep sucking on Bubba's big
teat like the starved little man he was. He was making up for lost
time and making noises which bordered on the obscene. His
surrogate family and guards smiled at the baby's attack on Bubba's
tit. The more he drank, the stronger he became, and the better he
began to look.
Cowboy Jack and Lem got busy and found an old metal pan with sides
and put some warm water in it to bathe the baby after he fed. The
lady who took care of Baby Ho-Tep, as well as conditions allowed,
found a clean wash cloth and a towel to bathe and dry the baby.
She was amazed, she and her husband could hear and speak mind to
mind with the youngsters. They thought Jack and Lem were more
readily approachable than the mature men and other members of the
away-group. They seemed to have more patience and acted more
grounded. The two young cowboys would go out of their way to
explain about themselves and why they were there. They carefully
answered any questions the couple asked. The guards took
advantage. They forgot about their warrior-protector status and
tried to learn as much as they could about the special people they
heard rumors they were going to join and live with on another
world.
While the baby nursed on Bubba's teat, the rest of the men came to
congratulate Captain Langstrom and pay their respect. “I think
your quick action under fire, your bravery, and undaunted spirit
requires a field promotion, Son. I hereby raise you the to rank of
Major, and when we get back I'm raising your husband to Brigadier
General. Hank Halfablap is way past-due a promotion,” the General
said.
The men shook hands and everyone applauded for the new Major Bart
Langstrom. “Thank you, General. I'll try to make you proud of me,
sir,” Bart said almost in tears.
“You already have made me very proud of you, Son, and I expect you
will continue to do so,” the General replied.
“Speaking of which, I'm wary about the situation we found here and
how we are to go about refurbishing our new family member, sir,”
Bart said.
“We're with the Major, General,” Cowboy Jack said and Lem agreed.
“We're downright vulnerable here, sir,” Lem added.
“Spill, Major! Bake me a cake! What chu' men got on your minds,
Son?” the General asked.
“Doing any major shit for our new little brother-bairn and these
frightened folks here on this poor excuse for a planet might get
us in more trouble than it's worth. You were sent with us as our
DNA exchange expert, and while it's a fast and effective method,
if we're discovered during a DNA addition/transition or
refurbishing application we might be compromised and have to spend
unnecessary time cleaning up our mess,” Major Langstrom explained.
“Makes sense to me. Is there more? Swing yore' cat by the tail,
Major! Make him holler!” the General charged.
“I know Master Billy wanted to be a part of our new family
member's DNA exchange, but we don't really need him. My husband
would be a perfect substitute for him and has a more pure set of
the Daniels DNA than Master Billy,” Bart explained.
“I see where you're going with this. Of course Hank would be the
perfect Daniels donor. A son for you and the new Brigadier General
and another little bro for Master Billy, would be just the
ticket,” the General agreed.
“Them's my thoughts, General. We send Lem and Jack to gather
General Hank and have them meet us back at the ranch. We gather
our away-team, them other folks, open a gate to the ship, and
high-tail it off this planet before we're discovered. We take care
of refurbishing and a transition of Baby Ho-Tep to Oran Augustus
Daniels Junior and bring them other folks around-right. It might
take us a while, but with the time differentiation, it will only
seem like minutes pass on Retikki Prime. When we finish, we send
Lem and Jack back to Retikki Prime and transport the Pharaoh and
his wife to Earth for a DNA exchange. We can take our time, do a
good job, and before you can say 'Bob's yore' uncle,' return
everyone to Retikki Prime before anyone misses them. Also, as you
well know, you can never count on any plan going smoothly, so it's
best to make plans utilizing the time differentiation and make
damn sure when you fight a battle it's on your own home-turf and
you got all yore' ducks in a row,” Major Langstrom explained.
“Damn! You sure I gave you a high enough promotion, Major?” the
General asked and grinned.
“I'm fine, General. I'm down and proud with being a Major, sir,”
Bart replied, and everyone agreed they had a good plan.
“So you say, Son, but I got my eye on you. Let's head 'em up and
move 'em out, Major,” the General ordered.
Bart opened a gate with reverse coordinates for Retikki Prime, and
Lem and Jack walked through. They decided the General should go
with them to put some weight behind their change of plans. When
Lem shut down the gate from the Retikki side, Bart opened another
gate with the coordinates for the dungeon area on Captain Nick's
ship, Lillith's Joy, and herded everyone through with Boomer
carrying baby Ho-Tep. Both parties were glad to be away from the
small planet Ahwetoe-Menipata. Even the six new folks seemed to be
more at ease. Bart surmised, after living such horrendously
fearful lives in the Pharaoh's household, any new situation with
as much promise and empathy as the people from Earth showed them,
presented a far better picture for a new future than they could
ever imagine remaining in the court of Pharaoh Boa-Baleen Ho-Tep.
* * * * * * *
Very little time passed on Retikki Prime when General Boynton,
with Lem and Cowboy Jack, traveled back through the gate. They
explained they made a rushed effort to leave Ahwetoe-Menipata
before they attempted anything major to lower their chance of
being discovered and have to cover their tracks. The General and
the young cowboys decided neither to openly discuss any details
about the death of baby Ho-tep nor the valiant effort on Major
Langstrom's part to resuscitate him. They would wait until later
when the smoke cleared. A few eyebrows raised at the new title of
'Major' for Bart, but then the General and the two young cowboys
began calling Hank 'Brigadier General Halfablap.' The other
military men didn't miss the new rank either. They got big smiles
of approval on their faces, but they never questioned the men from
the away-team. A couple slapped old Hank on his back and whispered
their congratulations. Billy and his posse knew something big was
up, but they didn't push. They knew they would learn about it
later.
Young Lem expertly explained their plan for the DNA transfer
situation and decided Hank's DNA would be a more pure form of the
Daniels genetic print. Besides, they took a vote and decided the
new Brigadier General Hank Halfablap and his husband, Major Bart
Langstrom needed a refurbished son to raise who would be infused
with their combined DNA. Billy couldn't have agreed more and
though it was a wonderful idea. He wondered why he didn't think
about it. Nick just grinned knowingly like a constipated Cheshire
Cat. Lem continued, “Then, when we're through with the new folks,
if you can convince Pharaoh Ho-Tep and his wife to gate to Earth,
with the time dilatation on our side, we can take care of their
problems and have them back here before anyone has time to
discover they're missing,” Lem explained further.
“How about my away-team's plan, Brother Ho-Tep?” Billy asked and
continued, “I never suggested we take you to our ranch to make the
necessary changes for you and your wife, because I was trying to
accommodate you while keeping you safe; however, I think my men's
idea might be safer with considerably less chance of leaving a
trail of evidence for them blood-hound priests to sniff out. I can
promise you, you and your Queen will be treated as family and
nothing bad will happen to you. At this point, we have as much
invested in your family as you have in ours. We gave you our word
we would take your son and his guardians into our family, and we
have done that. Will you agree to come to Earth with us to take
care of the rest without worry about time and being discovered?
Our relatives will cover for us if there are any questions from
your priests, Sire,” Billy asked the giant Pharaoh.
“When can you be ready to go, Master Billy?” Bubba Ho-Tep asked.
“How fast can we safely round up our posse, Tonto?” Billy asked.
“I can send out a blanket-tickle to your Cowboy-Angels and gather
all the power you need. We can be ready to gate back to the ranch
in fifteen minutes,” Nick said.
“How long would we be gone from Retikki Prime?” Bubba Ho-Tep
asked.
“Less than an hour Retikki Prime time, your Highness,” Billy
replied.
“Let's do it!” Ho-Tep said.
“Call our men and watchers, Tonto,” Billy said to Nick.
“Done, Kemosabe,” Nick replied, and in less than ten minutes,
thirty Cowboy-Angels and Watchers walked into the huge conference
room including Kate Daniels, Zelma Redbone, Jennifer Halfablap,
Abigail McMartin, and little Jenny Robertson. The two generals,
Boynton and Halfablap, led the troops through the gate, and Billy
escorted his royal guests into the dungeon on board Captain Nick's
ship on planet Earth.
* * * * * * *
Soon after they arrived, Billy sent a blanket mental-message to
his men in the away-team including Major Langstrom. << Will
someone please fill me in on what's going on so far?
>> he pleaded.
<< Cowboy Jack, throw our beloved Master a bone!
>> Billy heard Bart send to Jack.
<< We have taken care of the four guards and the two
caretakers for the baby, Master Billy. They have been completely
refurbished with minor DNA tweeks to take a number of years off
their original appearance. The guards have been given
comfortable, cozy, happy-home-companion size penises – more meat
than they can hold in one hand, and they have been given new
tongues. The caretakers have also been age-refurbished, their
hearing restored, and they, too, have new tongues. They're in
the dinning hall right now enjoying soup and soft foods learning
to eat and not chew their new tongues. We'll leave the option
whether you wish to share their restored form with our visitors
or not, Master Billy, >> Cowboy Jack sent to Billy
and paused for a moment.
<< Baby Ho-Tep was dead when we arrived on
Ahwetoe-Menipata. He got an allergy from the strange animal milk
they tried to feed him. He couldn't digest it, and they had no
other option. He wasted away. He was little more than a small
bag of bones. We were devastated. We knew how important our
mission was to form a tight, working bond with the Etheropteans.
Everyone on our away-team were either deeply disturbed or
panicked by the news. It was like we were broadsided without any
warning. Everyone was ready to give up. That is, everyone but
Major Langstrom. Master Bart wouldn't take 'no' for an answer.
He immediately took charge, and with our help, he brought the
child back to life.
<< Major Langstrom became our rock. He was sure we could
overcome our setback. There was no doubt in his mind, and he
wouldn't let us argue otherwise. He was so together, he simply
saw what needed to be done and began barking orders to everyone.
After a few minutes, nobody doubted he could pull off a miracle
if we did our part and followed his orders. No one dared
challenge him – not even the General. General Boynton handed him
the reins and let him run free. Our beloved Heavy-Drop firmly
urged everyone to do as Major Langstrom ordered. Master Bart was
so firm, self-assured, strong-willed, and unbelievably
impressive in the face of despair, General Boynton gave him a
field promotion to Major and promoted my granddad to a Brigadier
General at the same time, >> Jack sent his report.
<< Excellent report, Cowboy Jack! Do I detect a small
amount of hero worship in your account, Son? >> Billy
asked and smiled.
<< Hell yes, Master Billy! And not just a small amount,
sir! Major Langstrom was magnificent – I was very much
overwhelmed by him – his sense of humility and humanity, and his
take-charge persona under pressure was remarkable. He marched
right up to death, bellied-up close enough to smell the foul
odor of his breath, looked into his ugly face, stared down his
dark eyes, and demanded he give back the child he stole from us.
Ain't no two ways about it, Master Billy, Major Bart has become
my number one roll model. I want to live my life as close to his
example as possible! >> Jack exclaimed.
<< Hosanna! I think you picked a winner, Son. From the
enthusiasm of your fine report, Cowboy Jack, I'm just a mite
envious I wasn't there to share the moment with you men,
>> Billy sent.
<< Meaning no disrespect, sir, but if you were there,
Major Bart's moment would never have happened, Master Billy. Not
to worry, sir! We got videos we'll watch together as family when
our guests have gone, sir. I promise you, it will be well worth
your time, >> Jack sent, smiled, and
winked.
<< I understand, and I'm proud of everyone on our
away-team, >> Billy sent.
Once Billy got his update, he was satisfied the new plan would
work better than anything he could come up with playing it by ear.
He decided to delegate and let his men run with the ball. He began
to act more like a gracious host or a master of ceremony for the
visiting royalty.
“We thought you might like to experience our method of
refurbishing and enhancing baby Ho-Tep, but I must warn you, while
he will still have a portion of your DNA, it will mostly lie
dormant in his system. We will remake him in our image, and
according to our agreement, he will belong to our family. What we
will do for him, is a major operation or an overhaul of his
system. We will see to it he becomes a successful Earthly
humanoid. We will give him enough of our DNA to make his life
meaningful and provide him a sense of family he never would have
experienced being hidden away. We plan to do the same for you, but
considerably less, with minor tweeks here and there and changes of
your DNA to make sure you have strong, healthy children, of whom,
you can be proud. There will be no changes made to your minds or
personalities. You must be able to retain your current skills and
educations to rule such a large world and others in a large
galaxy,” Billy said.
Billy already knew the plan for Baby Ho-tep. Once again, everyone
gave the reins to Major Bart, and he ordered the gathering of
Billy's Cowboy-Angels to fledge. The Ho-Teps were impressed with
approximately fifty good looking men and a couple of ladies
grew-in their wings in the matter of minutes. In the center of the
room stood General Boynton morphed into his huge Watcher persona
and those who were to join him in refurbishing and donating DNA to
the new Daniels family members, removed their clothing. No boots
were allowed because of the flow of energy in the vortex created
by the power from the Cowboy-Angels required a ground. Apart from
the General, the inner circle would include Brigadier General Hank
Halfablap, also known as Oran Augustus Daniels; Marine Corps Major
Bart Langstrom; the giant Archangel Meat; Buckaroo Lem; and,
Commander Hunk from the Essengurda. Billy wanted an equal mix of
warriors and leaders of renown. He knew Lem was also a patchwork
of strong men with high intelligence quotients, and he wanted that
amalgam for Oran Augustus Daniels Junior.
As the vortex began to build and flow through the General,
everyone was waiting for the baby to be brought to them; however,
to everyone's surprise, as the men were just beginning to leave
the floor of the dungeon, Royce Boynton pulled open his pouch and
extracted the sleeping baby. A few gasped, several chuckled, some
oohed or aahed, but the Ho-Teps were astounded. The tiny
pin-headed baby opened his eyes and looked up at the giant Watcher
holding him, stuck out is small hand and touched the General's
magnificent furry face and smiled. The General smiled back, pulled
him to his breast, and the baby began to feed again.
“Should we stop, General?” Hank asked.
“No! No! We can multi-task. The more he drinks the sleepier he
will get, and hopefully he will sleep through the bad parts of
bone stretching and growing into a more correct proportion for a
healthy baby. Lets get connected and Mother Nature will take care
of the rest,” General Boynton replied.
As their feet left the floor and the men were floating suspended
in air like they were on a slow-motion merry-go-round, they began
to press and play with their navels where their native umbilical
cords were severed from their mothers. Soon they began to respond
and started to slowly grow like snakes issuing from their bodies.
Billy carefully watched Bubba Ho-Tep out of the periphery of his
vision and saw the giant Pharaoh's mouth drop open like what he
was watching was beyond belief. It couldn't be real, and yet, he
was standing only one good stride away from them. He could see
everything. There was no doubt in his or his wife's mind the baby
the General was holding was their son.
The General held the baby in his left arm hooked to his large teat
and played with his own umbilical cord with his right hand until
it grew about two feet long. It acted like it possessed an
intelligence of its own and was looking for others with which to
conjoin. It didn't take long and he linked with Major Langstrom,
then joined with Brigadier General Halfablap, and so on until the
four large warriors and one young cowboy were connected. Then, the
General began to play with the baby's cord, and it grew faster
than the rest as if it couldn't wait to become connected and feast
on some strong and healthy DNA. Someone made a suggestion, as a
metaphor, the six men represented a new womb or incubator in which
nature's faults could be corrected by men of a more benevolent
nature. Several others, who were full of piss and vinegar and
refused to give up their brand of cowboy-humor gave the exercise a
rather unkind cognomen. They began to refer to it as 'The
cow-pasture carousel.' They were quite sure, if a cowboy was a
quart low on bullshit, it would fill him up pert-damn quick.
The Pharaoh and his queen watched as their baby's head and body
began to grow into the natural proportions of a normal child.
Queen Isis leaned on her husband's large shoulder and shed tears
of joy to see their child growing into an average human baby. They
knew there was nothing they could do to claim the child as their
own. They already bargained baby Ho-Tep away to guarantee their
security, but they knew from what they were observing their bodies
would be adjusted so they wouldn't have to worry about having more
children. They were also convinced their first born babe would
have a wonderful life among the people of Earth. They both agreed,
if it were not for Master Billy Daniels and his family, they quite
possibly might not survive.
The correction carousel took about an hour and a half to complete,
and they were done. The new Daniels baby slept soundly through
most of the ordeal and after his little cord was severed, healed,
and taped, General Boynton opened his huge pouch and returned baby
Oran Augustus Daniels Junior to his temporary cradle. Billy urged
the Pharaoh to be the next to ride the carousel as the same men
who would have the most advantageous DNA material which he needed
and their umbilical cords were already grown and ready for
connection. Billy offered to help the Pharaoh undress. He seemed
shy and needed encouragement. Billy saw this kind of reluctance
before.
“Man to man, your Highness, friend to friend, are you smaller than
the men you see around you, Sire?” Billy asked.
“Considerably, Master Billy. When my wife and I shared sex
together we worried I couldn't get into her far enough to
impregnate her. We were lucky, but at least one tiny sperm cell
was enough of a hero to struggle on to find a fertile egg,” Bubba
Ho-Tep said quietly.
“Do you and your wife trust me and my men, Bubba?” Billy asked
informally.
“Of course we do. After what we've observed, how could we not
unless we were complete morons,” Bubba Ho-Tep replied.
“My men will see you are enlarged to a handsome degree. Have you
seen a penis on one of my men you particularly admire?” Billy
asked.
“Most certainly, Master Billy. Your Grand Uncle, the one you call
Hank, has the finest looking penis I've ever seen on a humanoid,”
Ho-Tep replied.
“Then you shall have a duplicate of his penis. Will we need to
adjust your wife to accommodate your new size for a comfortable
fit, Sire?” Billy asked.
“You might, since I'm so small I have no way of telling. I have
never plumbed her depths,” Bubba Ho-Tep replied.
“Don't worry, we'll take care of both. As I mentioned before, your
lady must also ride our DNA carousel, and the ladies I have
selected to ride with her will be able to judge. I promise we will
give you both a perfect fit to bring you the greatest pleasure. I
shudder to think the number of children you will have,” Billy
said, winked at Bubba Ho-Tep, and laughed. He got a laugh from
him. A little humor seemed to break the ice. Billy helped him off
with his robe, offered his arm, and lead the giant Pharaoh to his
place in the DNA carousel.
Billy made one change in the lineup of men to provide the
necessary DNA to Bubba Ho-Tep. He considered, since the Pharaoh
was so much larger than the humans, he would include one of his
giants for balance. Billy substituted Lem with Billy Gog Groats,
and Gog was happy to oblige. Billy gave his final instructions to
his men. Hank was flattered the giant monarch admired his penis
enough to request a copy. They outfitted him with one almost
exactly like the new Brigadier General's but enlarged to be
proportionate with his giant body provided by Gog's DNA.
Everyone watched in awe as the Pharaoh grew in every portion of
his body. Before change began, he was tall and skinny with a long
face and exaggerated buttocks and hips which gave him a more
fragile, feminine appearance. Not anymore. The new DNA was
rebuilding his body to look like an avid body builder from Earth
to say nothing of his augmented penis. Bubba Ho-Tep's wife, Queen
Isis, was thrilled by what she saw happening to her husband. Queen
Isis found her love and sexual libido in competition over her
husband's new look, and they were suffering a minor cat-fight for
consideration. She would look at his growing penis, and her mouth
would fill with saliva. Her vagina became so moist she was afraid
she would start dripping. Zelma Redbone could feel her conundrum
and slipped her a sanitary napkin to absorb any overflow. Queen
Isis was grateful Zelma helped her escape embarrassment.
It took a little over two hours to refurbish and rebuild Pharaoh
Boa-Baleen Ho-Tep. Everyone applauded when his cord was finally
cut, healed, and he became his own person again. He was so
enthused by the Cowboy-Angels response to his new image, he waved
away his royal robe and told Billy he would remain nude for his
wife's turn on the DNA carousel. Several came up to him and
offered their hand, and he responded. It was the first time in his
life he ever allow a commoner to touch him other than his chamber
slaves. He came to the conclusion, while he was among Billy
Daniels family, he would abide by their rules and customs. He
wondered if the DNA exchange might have anything to do with his
new thoughts; however, if it was true, he welcomed the ability to
learn a new way of living which might bring him a bit more
understanding of his own people, a modicum of comfort, and a great
deal of relaxed enjoyment of a new
life.
* * * * * * *
Billy asked Zelma Redbone if she would be the main DNA contributor
for Queen Isis. He shared with her a conversation with the
Ho-Teps, in which he told them he would choose a lady of high rank
and quality breeding to supply his queen with the tough and rugged
DNA her body might require. Zelma laughed and replied the highest
rank she achieved was after a long ride on her favorite gelded
stallion around the ranch on a hot summer's day. “I smelled more
like a horse than human. I was so rank I reeked to the high
heavens,” she said and giggled like a school girl. “However, I
will stand up for my family's DNA. I come from a line of tough
Texas women who were as much trail blazers as their husbands, and
they were fine stock for breeding. Their health was strong and
they bore many healthy children who carved their own fortunes out
of a wilderness,” she said firmly, then continued,“I never, in my
wildest fantasies, thought I'd be offered the chance, the
unimaginable opportunity to become a grandmother-goddess by proxy
to another civilization. Hell, yes, let's do it!” she exclaimed.
“You're exactly what we're looking for, Ms. Zelma, but I can only
promise you the title of Grandma Zelma Redbone Ho-Tep on our
planet,” Billy used his considerable charm and laughed.
“I'll gladly accept the title, Master Billy Daniels,” she replied,
and they shared another laugh.
Abigail McMartin jumped at the chance and so did Jennifer Daniels,
formally known as Jennifer Halfablap. Kate told Billy, if he
didn't allow her in the circle, she would throw a hissy-fit so
embarrassing, he wouldn't have the help of the other three ladies,
and like a flock of hens, they backed-up their sister. Billy
humbly apologized and told his grandmother he was saving his last
invitation for the very best. Kate didn't believe him for a
minute, but she was gracious and accepted his apology.
Billy didn't know how he might feel seeing several major women in
his family naked, but he was in charge and held responsibilities.
He would just have to suffer through it in the name of doing unto
others. He couldn't remember a time ever seeing his grandmother
without clothes. It would certainly be a new experience. He left
his mentat-channel open and prayed. << If there's any
god out there in the universe who can hear me...even a god with
no name or rank what I done swore upon….please allow me to be a
gentleman and get me through this ordeal without cringing or my
eyes bleeding, >> he sent out into the universe and
heard several of his family laugh and sigh deeply with empathy.
<< Hosanna? >> he heard one weak voice asked
quietly.
<< Hosanna, in the highest! >> he heard
whispered from the rest. At least Billy knew he wasn't alone. It
made him feel only a bit stronger in his resolve.
The women had it figured out before they even considered who would
join Queen Isis in the circle. They took Lady Isis off to a side
room and draped her with a beautifully colored Hawaiian Muu-muu.
Then they covered themselves with equally beautiful and
outrageously colorful Muu-muus. Then they marched single file to
the DNA circle where General Boynton, morphed to his Watcher
persona, was waiting. They took their places, quickly took off
their Muu-muus and stood waiting for the Cowboy-Angels and the
giant Watchers to began gathering the healing power from the
ethos. The ladies entrance was admired. It was tasteful, well
done, and politely considerate. Several of the men applauded for
the ladies and their resolve not to be just sexual items, and they
damn-well demanded their respect. Respect overflowed in the
dungeon that afternoon. The ladies rode the carousel with General
Boynton for two full hours, and they were completely drained and
exhausted when they were finally cut, healed, and taped. Their
Muu-muus were handed to them, and they lost no time dressing
themselves.
Everything was done and General Boynton was one tired cowboy;
however, it didn't stop him from pulling baby Oran Daniels from
his huge pouch and hooked him up to his big teat. Many of the
Cowboy-Angels gathered to get a closer look at Hank and Bart's new
son. The baby opened his little eyes and looked around the room at
the handsome naked men with wings on their backs. He smiled
sweetly, and waved his little hand. They waved back at him as he
returned his attention to the General's wonderful teat.
Bubba Ho-Tep was heard to give a long, deep, painful sigh of
sorrow and relief. He wondered to himself how he could feel so
sad, and yet, relieved at the same time. Bubba Ho-Tep felt good.
His first born son was where he should be, and he knew he must let
him go. There was no turning back, but by allowing Master Billy
and his family to come to his rescue, the Pharaoh came to realize
he and his wife gained so much more, made an alliance with another
powerful family, and a friendship which he hoped would last a good
long while. He overheard the giant rulers of Retikii Prime say the
Daniels family were a new, fresh, vibrant, and concerned young
civilization blooming within a larger group who foolishly repeated
the same mistakes for centuries.
* * * * * * *
Lady Isis felt like she made eternal friends and relations with
the four gracious and concerned women of the Daniels family. She
never felt more alive and important in her life. With the ladies
help, she removed her Muu-muu and replaced it with her royal robe.
The ladies quickly placed her Muu-muu into a black plastic trash
bag and gave it to her as a memorial gift of her conjoining with
them and her new rebirth. Isis was moved to tears at the Daniels
family empathy and consideration. She promised she would keep it
forever, and she meant it. The ladies, still in their outrageous
colorful dresses took her to the great dining hall to join her
husband and enjoy a treat of Texas Tea and Hosanna Cakes. The men
gave her a standing ovation when she walked in and took her place
next to her husband.
They didn't spend a lot of time with the Daniels family after the
DNA processes were complete, but they remained long enough to
enjoy some tea and sweet cakes, and to express their thanks and
relief. Bubba Ho-Tep made a moving speech, in which he stated he
hoped he and his family might become close friends with Daniels
family because he felt they both possessed important things to
offer each other. He finally closed by saying he and his wife
would never forget the courage and kindness they were shown that
afternoon, and they would be looking forward to the rest of their
stay together on Retikki Prime. He didn't say as much but Billy
knew Pharaoh Boa-Baleen Ho-Tep and his Queen Isis had one more
hurdle to jump before they returned to their home planet. He was
confident they would win the race, and his queen would become
pregnant with a healthy new heir to the Etheroptean throne who
would carry with him the echoes of another fine, strong family on
a small blue planet in another galaxy.
* * * * * * *
Everyone returned to Retikki Prime and no one but Billy and
Boomer's relatives were the wiser to a little side trip made by
the Pharaoh and his wife. Bubba Ho-Tep filled-out some in his face
but under his robe you couldn't tell his body was considerably
beefed up. He didn't seem worried in the least. He told Billy his
main priest wouldn't dare say a thing beyond asking if he was all
right or if he gained weight. He seemed to think they could easily
be diverted, and he said if he is able to make an announcement of
his wife being pregnant, their curiosity would be set aside. Billy
was impressed his brother Bubba Ho-Tep was sure of himself and
knew how to keep overly curious factions at bay. After all, his
life and his family depended on his cunning.
The night couldn't come quickly enough for Bubba Ho-Tep and his
wife, but they managed to keep several other engagements, and
another meeting with the other world leaders, talking and making
suggestions, regarding what course of action the Daniels family
might consider and how to go about changing their world to prevent
a catastrophe. Finally, the evening came to an end and after a
fine meal, the royals retired to their suite of rooms. They
dismissed their chamber slaves and only kept two large guards
stationed out front of their bedroom. No one could enter their
private chamber without the permission of the guards and their
orders were not to let anyone in unless it was a matter of life or
death. They spent a joyous evening enjoying their new bodies, and
for the first time in his life, Bubba Ho-Tep felt like a complete
man. Queen Isis couldn't have been more happy, and they enjoyed
sex as it should be – not just to squirt a small platoon of crotch
commandos, pat them on their tiny butts, send them into battle,
and wish them luck. Bubba felt confident he could fill his wife's
tank with a tsunami of his love and deliver the goods to her front
porch. Isis had no complaints, and fell in love with her husband
for the second time.
The next morning, after breakfast, Bubba Ho-Tep announced to his
high priests he would have another short private visit with the
Lord High Chancellors of Retikki and a couple of their close
family members. His priest didn't have a clue Billy Daniels and
his husband were the family members he mentioned. The Pharaoh told
them he and his wife would probably be with them for about an
hour, but they would take two guards along for their protection.
They were none the wiser.
Billy, Nick, and Boomer, who was carrying the new, young, Oran
Junior in his pouch; several Cowboy-Angels; Bubba Kirkendall;
Meat; Doc Oatie; Balthazar; Clyde; General Boynton; Brigadier
General Halfablap, and his husband, Major Langstrom, were there
waiting. The four ladies who rode the carousel with Queen Isis
were there, too. Oatie took a syringe, withdrew a small amount of
royal blood from Queen Isis, and placed a couple of drops on
several glass slides. Each Cowboy-Angel took a slide, put a finger
in the blood sample, and tasted it. They waited for a couple of
minutes, smiled, and then nodded to Billy. “Congratulations, Bubba
Ho-Tep, your lovely wife is pregnant. Your lady is going to have
another baby, and it will be a male child – a prince,” Billy said
with enthusiasm. Ho-Tep and his spouse couldn't contain their joy.
They were hugging and kissing everyone. Again, they couldn't thank
Master Billy and his family enough. The giant Watchers looked on
like two big teddy bear daddies, embraced the
happy couple, and wished them well. They were done and ready to
head-out for another concert with Maestro Billy and his band of
merry music makers.
* * * * * * *
The Daniels family got ready to travel into the center of town for
their second performance. Since Boomer would be one of the
featured singers in a couple of their musical productions, he
asked General Boynton if he would mind morphing into his Watcher
persona and carrying baby Oran. For a man with a solid, hard-nosed
military background, children were Royce Boynton's nemesis – an
unconquerable opponent. Whenever there was a child around, his
heart turned to Jello. His defenses and stern military attitudes
melted like a well made pesto spreads on warm hardtack. He never
considered a battle plan. The big man threw up his hands and
surrendered. He was at their mercy. He became their gentle beast.
Lieutenant Royce Junior swore he never knew his dad was a military
man for the first six years of his life. The General kept the
reality of his life a secret from his boy as long as he could to
protect his childhood from the reality of war. The General was
happy to comply with Boomer's request, but first was forced to run
interference from his mate who thought they should be passing
around the 'Football' – a secret cognomen baby Oran got from the
cowboys on his away-team. Baug thought seeing to little Oran's
needs would be great training for him when their baby decided to
leave his womb.
“And what makes you think you're gonna' have our baby to yourself,
Sweetie? Without my heavy-sauce you wouldn't be bake'n our little
bun in yore' hot oven,” General Heavy-drop asked and giggled like
a school boy at the look on his mate's face.
“Well, I better get Sunday afternoons with no argument!” Baug
exclaimed.
“You may have Sundays, my Love,” the General conceded, and the
giant Watchers laughed.
As General Heavy-drop opened his pouch and gently lowered the
small refurbished and healthy 'Football' inside, he began to
rumble a lullaby which was imprinted on his basic Watcher DNA – a
tune to soothe and relax the babe. It was a song a pregnant
warrior would sing to his wee-bairn to keep him calm and help him
sleep peacefully even in the height of combat. For years
afterward, long after his and Baug's children were grown, when any
sibling they ever nurtured would return the General's big arms,
and beg him to sing the 'Hide the football' song for them one more
time – General Heavy-drop never refused.
* * * * * * *
The General and his family, including his son, Roy, Baug, and most
of the Halfablap family sat in secure royal boxes with the Lord
High Chancellors of Retikii Prime and the other royal guest
including Pharaoh Boa-Balee Ho-Tep, his wife, guards, and several
of the religious cast. The Pharaoh caught sight of the huge image
of the General morphed as a Watcher and noticed the bulge in his
lower abdomen, smiled, and nodded his approval. General Heavy-drop
placed his huge furry hands beneath his belly and gently rocked it
like a cradle. Bubba Ho-Tep couldn't have been more pleased and
comfortable with the outcome of the Daniels family rescue.
The Daniels ladies decided to wear their outrageously colorful
Muu-muus with their hair done up with the same cloth from which
they made the dresses. They sat down front with the rest of the
Daniels family and the crowd went crazy when they made their
entrance. They were fresh and ready to enjoy some good music. They
gave the ladies a standing ovation. They unwittingly started a
fashion trend that spread like wildfire. They sent a silent
message to Lady Isis they were still thinking about her and wished
her well. The lady and her husband understood their message, and
it only made them love and respect the Daniels family more.
The crowds were larger than they were the day before. Many didn't
want to fight the crowds and stayed home to watch on holo-video,
but it seemed like it wasn't enough. They needed to experience
Billy Daniels and his orchestra up close and personal – or as
close as they could get. Sitting at home listening to an enormous
piece of music as overwhelming as Beethoven's Ninth Symphony
through two speakers the size of a soup can just can't produce the
same affect like sitting in the audience and have the experience
of genius wash over your being, curl your toenails, rattle your
fillings, jump start your heart, and make you want to shout,
'Hallelujah,' and 'Hosanna, in the highest!' The production
manager, the entertainment Czar Moewhotoo Gabberdean shared with
Billy's family a few observations. After the first concert, many
of the people camped all night in their favorite areas to assure
themselves and their families a good spot to view and listen.
After everyone was seated and settled down, Billy came out from
the back of the stage and once again the crowd went crazy
applauding him. Everyone stood for him and gave him a grand
ovation. Billy took bow after bow, and had the orchestra stand to
take a bow with him. Finally, he got them settled down and looked
out at the sea of people representing many races. He was stunned
by the size of the crowd. He surmised it must have been several
times larger than the day before. Since he committed to the two
concerts, he got together with his staff several days before
transporting to Retikki Prime and made two one-hour videos about
the music on his planet and how it evolved as being one of the
most popular art forms. The videos were shown several times and
were shown again the evening before each performance so the people
of Retikki Prime would have a better understanding of what the
orchestra was playing and why.
Billy wasted no time. He got right down to the business of
music-making and told his audience the concert today would be
dedicated to modern music from the middle of the last century on
his planet to modern day music. “Music, along with the other arts
created on our planet, has gone through many transitions over the
years. The arts, including painting, craft-work, writing, dramatic
works, dance, videos, and music have only been subject to major
changes during the last three centuries – from the year 1750, with
the death of perhaps, one of the greatest composers of all time,
Johann Sebastian Bach, in many people's minds brought about the
end of the baroque era. Let me see a show of hands. How many of
you out there watched the three videos I sent explaining the music
we will be playing?” he asked and a sea of hands went up over the
plaza. Billy grinned real big. “Good, good! Then you should have a
good idea the kind of music you will hear today,” he said and
continued.
“During Bach's time other composers were making great strides to
bring about change in music-making which opened the door to new
thoughts and new ways of creating and playing music. How long did
the baroque era last you might ask? It lasted six hundred years.
It had a good run and there are endless volumes of wonderful,
beautiful music left behind by hundreds of musicians from that
era. Our current date is 2035 and our most gifted musicians have
worked for nearly three hundred years to create music of all sorts
in different styles and modes of composition. Composers have taken
music from very strict formal rules and let their imaginations run
wild to create music not only melodic and lovely but also to build
sound structures that defy the old ways and look toward and
embrace the future.” Billy started.
“The first piece we will play for you was explained on our video.
However for those who didn't, 'Charles Ives' short but meaningful
composition, 'The Unanswered Question,' the composer himself
described his piece of music as asking the question of existence.
Where did we come from and why? The woodwinds represent man's
attempt to explain the unknowable. As they make attempts to find
an answer, they become frustrated and finally mock the trumpet in
an attempt to demystify the question. Finally, they get angry and
throw everything they got at it to baffle the question with
bullshit, but they fail miserably and bite their nails together.
The question remains pure and unscathed and is asked one more time
by the trumpet as the silent druids leave and disappear into the
evening mist,” the Maestro explained.
Billy turned to his orchestra who were smiling at his explanation
of the piece. They came to know him so well they wouldn't have
expected less. Billy motioned for his soloist and woodwind choir
to come onto the stage. There was some hubbub from the audience
when on the left side came Zeke fully fledged with Gabriel's seven
foot long gold trumpet wearing only a short pure white sleeveless
tunic which stopped just above his knees and was cinched around
his waist with a gold belt. He was also wearing a stunning pair of
gold cowboy boots with mule ears what came almost up to his knees.
No one doubted whose hand was responsible for suggesting his
costume. Nevertheless, Zeke was applauded loudly. The woodwind
choir walked onto stage on the right in their dark brown hooded
robes made of itch-free sackcloth. They were suppose to look like
Druids of old, but it was a remarkable coincidence they looked
very much like the religious cast which follow the Pharaoh
Boa-Baleen Ho-Tep almost everywhere he went.
Billy looked over to Zeke, kissed the palm of his own hand and
blew it toward the older, refurbished Cowboy-Angel. Zeke pretended
to catch it and tuck it away in his heart. Billy raised his hand
signaling for Zeke to raise his beautiful white wings to become
airborne and the handsome Cowboy-Angel floated, suspended in
midair just to the left of the orchestra. The audience gasp and
applauded. When they settled down, Billy gave the downbeat and the
strings began to play. Billy told his people to play the piece at
a snails pace, not only to milk the exquisite chordal changes, but
also to give the soloist the maximum time to make an indelible
impression. Billy's orchestra would face the fires of Hell for him
and would play a piece exactly the way he wanted; which, most of
the time, they came to agree, Master Billy's way was the right
way.
It was, indeed, a short piece of music but the message and
delivery was profound. No one was left sitting after the final
chord drifted off into the ethos. The audience was applauding,
jumping up and down, yelling and screaming, with tears in their
eyes. There was no doubt, they were deeply moved and needed to
show their agreement and appreciation. Zeke glided down to share
the podium with Billy. They hugged and kissed each other as the
audience continued their deafening roar. Billy motioned for the
the woodwind players to throw back their hoods and join him and
Zeke. They walked up to the podium, and there followed more cheers
and applause. It was a grand moment Billy and his people would
never forget.
* * * * * * *
“He is mocking us!” Setee exclaimed angrily.
“Calm yourself, Setee,” Bubba Ho-Tep replied, “You are not the
only cast to wear hooded robes. Maestro Billy is only expressing a
part of his history. He couldn't have known about our
civilization. It was you who recognized the pyramids and gods of
the Egyptians in his video. I'll have no more talk to demonize
someone whom your Pharaoh has befriended and has come to look upon
as a brother,” he said firmly. Setee was stunned, but he knew
better than make a direct challenge to the throne. He knew better
than to even entertain such and idea without the unanimous support
from his fellow priests. His chances were little to none.
“We will need to know every detail of your private conversations
with him and his family this morning,” Setee refused to let it
drop and challenged boldly.
“No! Absolutely not! You don't need to know. You have you
Pharaoh's word, nothing was discussed concerning our planet or our
defense thereof. They are not enemies. They are good and
empathetic people who have come to experience a faster evolution
than most societies, and they will continue to progress at a rapid
pace. They have much to offer, and they will grow into a peaceful
race who may become our great and comfortable loyal allies. You
must learn to curb your fanciful paranoia and ungrounded
apprehensions. Your continued health depends upon it, Setee. Do I
make myself clear?” the Pharaoh asked and raised an eyebrow.
“I understand, your Highness,” Setee replied quietly, but boiled
inside because he was shut out, dismissed so abruptly, and his
priestly powers challenged. He was, after all, the Lord High
Priest of the temples of their major gods, Isis, Khnum, Ra, Horus,
Anubis, Ptah, Shu, and Thoth. “There are more than a few
coincidences, your Majesty,” Setee shot one last volley like an
insolent child might push to have the final word.
“Enough, Priest! I will hear the music without competing with your
negative comments and your loathsome attitudes! Do not challenge
your Pharaoh, Priest! If you value your tongue, you will keep it
still, silent, and parked within your mouth,” the Pharaoh
demanded. Setee knew his balance on the high-wire was shaky, and
he would not dare speak again; however, like any spoiled child, he
pouted.
* * * * * * *
The concert manager, Moewhotoo Gabberdean, helped design the new
stage, and he made sure there would be a quick and easy way to
change the stage to bring in a larger instrument for concertos. A
section of the stage near the podium would sink into the
substructure where the instrument was stored, rolled on the stage,
and quickly raised again within minutes. Billy announced the next
piece was a brilliant piano concerto by an American composer by
the name of Lucas Foss. The orchestra's resident piano virtuoso
Jessie Jones would be their soloist. The stage elevator was raised
and locked into position and Jessie came out followed by his
musical guards, Daffy and Chloe. The audience went wild for Jessie
and his bodyguards. After they took a bow, they found their places
at the piano.
“Are you ready Master Jones?” Billy asked so everyone could hear.
“I'm ready, Maestro Billy,” Jessie replied.
“Are you ready, Madam Chloe?” he asked
“I'm ready, Master Billy,” she replied.
“Are you ready, Mister Daffy?” Billy asked.
“Let 'er rip, Maestro!” Daffy yelled back and everyone laughed.
It was the small comical banter Billy sometime exchanged with his
guests and performers which endeared him to his audience.
They were off with a great start and Jessie was in top form. He
played brilliantly. The audience was taught if the green light was
on there was more music to be played and to hold their applause
until the last or the red light came on. They responded correctly
and many marveled how it was like reading a book from chapter to
chapter until it was finished. After the beautiful second
movement, where Jessie showed his romantic side and won the hearts
of his audience, until the end of the rambunctious last movement
he was fully on top of the music and gave an outstanding reading
of the concerto. The instant the light turned red, the whole plaza
erupted like Mount Saint Helen on a lazy afternoon. The crowd
wouldn't let him off the stage and demanded he play an encore.
Jessie looked at Billy. Billy just took is left arm and pointed to
the piano and the crowd went crazy approving Maestro Billy's
invitation for Jessie to play an encore. Jessie smiled and nodded.
“What?” Billy asked.
“The Flight of the Bumble Bee. Set it up for me, Maestro,” Jessie
grinned.
“They should love that. Why not? Blazing the new country with old
horses,” Billy said and got a laugh from everyone.
“On our planet we have a beautiful small insect we call a Bumble
Bee. He goes about his day flying from meadow to meadow gathering
sweet nectar from the flowers. A great Russian composer, Rimsky
Korsakov, decided to write a piece of music describing the flight
of a Bumble Bee. Take it away, Master Jones,” Billy explained and
Jessie set in. The audience was enthralled and some stood on their
feet trying to get a better look, but the video over-head zeroed
in on his hands moving as fast as they could. A silence grew over
the audience until the very end of the piece; then, the people
broke loose and gave Jessie another standing ovation.
Billy winked at Jessie and hollered up into the orchestra to his
two Byrd men. He knew they knew the piece well and often played it
for an encore. “You! Byrd men! Stand up and show this audience
what you can do!” he hollered. The two Byrd men jumped up and
started playing the same piece perfectly on their baritones. The
son played the 'Bee' part and his dad added the harmony. When they
finished, the audience went crazy again. They were having much
more fun than they ever experienced at one of Master Billy's
concerts. After they finished, Jessie went up to shake hands with
the Byrd men, and raised their hands with his in a spirit of
musical camaraderie. The audience loved
them.
* * * * * * *
There was a brief intermission while the stage hands removed the
huge Bosendorfer and set up chairs for soloist and choir for the
next piece of music. Billy thoroughly explained on his video for
the concert that day, they would be playing and singing the first
act of Philip Glass's Opera 'Akhnaten.' Billy was careful to
explain how music was stuck in a rut of serial music championed
heavily by Arnold Schoenberg and his faithful acolytes at the turn
of the twentieth century. A lot of music from the period was
rarely listened to because, it possessed little if any of the
spontaneity of the human spirit. It was like writing music by a
strict code dictated by a board of governors – a few hard-nosed
academics who kept a strangle hold on music composition for years.
It worked for a few, but never was fully accepted by the many.
Very few people wanted to waste their time or strain their ears
long enough to listen.
Granted there were certain compositions which found their way into
the standard repertoire, but damn few compared with the mountain
of other non-serial works which challenged the death grip on
musical ideas. Classical music was in decline because there was
little or no appeal until a new composition was written in 1964 by
a young musician named Terry Riley. It was called 'Terry Riley in
C.' Catchy, huh? It was really quite simple but caught fire and
started an explosion of new ways to make music. It was almost like
going back to our roots and starting over again. And yes,
Virginia, it was inspired by hallucinogenic drugs. It was
erroneously labeled as 'minimalism' which couldn't be further from
the truth. Several historians have written, Riley's composition
will probably be considered one of the greatest achievements and
advance in the arts during the twentieth century. The influence
from Riley's music inspired another young composer who was a taxi
cab driver in New York, Philip Glass.
Akhnaten was one of Glass's three operas about men who conceived
and advanced uniquely radical ideas. Einstein, Gandhi, and
Akhnaten. Akhnaten was the first man in recorded history who
believed there was only one god and became a monotheist. He built
his own city and insisted his people give up their old religions
and worship only Ra, the sun god. Unfortunately, it didn't work
out for him. Akhnaten and his family were slaughtered by the
religious class, and they spent several generations trying to
erase him and his ideas from history. However, his legacy was,
there were several other monotheistic religions which sprang up in
his wake. Billy was careful not to get too political about
Akhnaten's life and pursued the musical aspects instead.
The choir was seated, and the overture began. The overhead
holo-video was showing shots of Egypt, the pyramids, and the
ancient wall paintings of the early Egyptians. Everyone was moved
and impressed how much their visitors, the Etheroptean's, seemed
to resemble the kings and people from early Egypt on Earth. The
Pharaoh and his wife seemed to enjoying the production; but, their
priest cast? Not so much. They were visibly disturbed. Bubba
Ho-Tep whispered to his wife he was glad they didn't announce her
pregnancy before the concert. Maestro Billy's timing couldn't have
been better. They planned to announce to everyone in the Palace
their good news. The Pharaoh thought it might go a long way to
placating the religious cast or as he often referred to them in
private, the Hell Hounds of Horus.
Aunt Helen and her twelve geniuses put together a video of the
first act of the opera using early footage from the original
German production and syncing with the music the orchestra as the
chorus was performing. It was a remarkable overlap. It not only
made for great music, it also made for great theater. The people
were engrossed by it. Even Billy's family was wowed by what Aunt
Helen and her little men accomplished. The clever production and
beautiful music was well received by everyone and the orchestra,
the choir, the soloist, and Maestro Billy, received huge ovations.
Many thought is was almost, but not quite as moving as Beethoven's
Ninth Symphony.
* * * * * * *
There was a thirty minute break after their performance of the
first act of Akhnaten. To reset the stage once again to bring up
the great Bosendorfer paino. After the intermission was over,
Billy took the podium.
“I'm constantly being asked why I don't perform more, and my
standard answer is, I am performing and my instrument is one of
the finest orchestras in any universe,” he said boldly and got a
huge ovation. “However, I did agree with our friends from Fort
Adam Lear, if they would agree to provide us with their beautiful
Bosendorfer piano, I would play a concerto with our orchestra. The
music I have chosen to play is in keeping with our program of
modern music. It was written by a South American composer in the
middle of the last century. His name was Alberto Ginastera. He is
only one of many who refused to pay homage to the god of
twelve-tone music and relied on his own creative talents to
compose something new and wonderful. The difficulty of the piece
doesn't lend itself readily to conducting and playing at the same
time; however, we've called in our second in command, our very on
Maestro Jessie Jones to mount the podium and conduct for us,”
Billy said and Jessie walked onto the stage to great applause.
Billy played flawlessly and with a brilliance his family never
heard before, which, in itself is a difficult task when one
performs such a demanding piece of music. Nevertheless, Billy rode
the Busendorfer out of the gate with great cowboy bravado and hung
on for dear life for the duration of his ride. Fortunately, he
wasn't wearing his spurs or the poor thing would have been reduced
to a pile of rubble. The audience loved the music and him. They
couldn't make up their mind who they loved the most so they
settled for cheering both. Billy took bow after bow and was lavish
with his praise for his conductor and his Concert Master. He
insisted they take a bow as well. He had the orchestra stand and
the audience roared their approval.
* * * * * * *
The stage hands immediately went to work and lowered the grand
piano under the stage. When the stage was clear they placed
another large rectangle instrument on the stage and draped it with
a huge canvas throw and raised the stage back into position. Billy
took the stage again and announced the next piece they would play
was written by a young brash composer who has his eyes on the
stars.
“His name is Andrew Norman and this young man is a new voice in
music with his own brand of originality and thoughts about the way
music may be organized and played. The work you are about to hear
uses the orchestra to create great, overwhelming sonic temporary
architectural sculptures whose half-life is lived only for a
moment or seconds for the whole work to become something of great
intelligence and beauty. As a matter of fact, if you watch the
overhead video while we play, our Boss Lady, our very own Aunt
Helen, and her team of technical geniuses, have created a video of
our new hotel, auditorium, and shopping center in a time lapse
film that shows the creation of our building from the ground up to
a magnificent sapphire blue structure. We're very proud of it, and
the music complements the video. We hope you enjoy it. The music
is bold, brash, amusing, cheeky and at other times heavily serious
in its message. The name of the piece is 'Play: Level 1' Lean back
in your seat, fasten your seat-belt if you have one, or have a
loved one place their hand on you so you don't fall out of your
chair. You're in for a twelve minute exciting romp,” Billy said
and grinned.
Billy began and became engrossed with his orchestra and their
playing. They seemed to come alive with the 'Norman' piece like
they never did before. They practiced it together, but it was
still so new to them they almost worked too hard to accomplish
what the composer wanted and what their Maestro expected of them.
There in lay the crux of the matter. They were worrying too much
about what was expected of them and making music. After the first
several bars, they were like a well trained pony, they took over,
Billy gave them the reins, and never looked back. They not only
gave Billy what he wanted, but they also excelled with the music
to make it sound so easy like they played it a thousand times
before and this was just a repeat of the cakewalk. They became the
orchestra Billy knew they could be. He felt it ironic, it just
happened. Everything came together on a strange, new, and somewhat
foreboding piece of avant-garde music. They adopted it like an
abandoned child, took it in from the cold, fed it, nurtured it,
and made it their own.
Strangely enough, the young audience new to modern music must have
felt their conundrum and joined the ride. Billy felt some
trepidation performing such an advanced piece so early in his and
the orchestra's relationship together, but he couldn't be more
wrong. They saw the piece as a tour-de-force of intelligence,
strength, and presented a strong challenge to the technical
abilities of any great orchestra. Maestro Billy's people were
pleased and quite smug with their accomplishment. They deserved
that right. Billy was proud of them, and they were equally proud
of themselves. They couldn't wait to drop the bomb on their
audience in Houston. Zelma giggled when she put the idea to Kate.
Kate told her she was a sick, twisted, and vicious old lady, and
she better not do it until she could be there with her to enjoy
the moment. They enjoyed a laugh together.
* * * * * * *
Billy figured after such a raucous and mind bending avant-garde
piece of music he should play another modern piece which was
considerably less rambunctious; yet, fifty years after its
composition in the middle of the previous century, was still
considered a startlingly modern and incredibly beautiful piece of
music. Billy didn't give much of an introduction for Bartok's
'Concerto for Orchestra' because he covered it thoroughly in his
second video encompassing modern music. Billy considered Bartok's
Concerto one the ten most important musical compositions of all
times. The orchestra was ready and primed after the 'Norman' piece
for something a bit more melodic and within the scope of a genius
without training wheels.
Billy's orchestra played flawlessly like they were playing in a
dream world, and they connected with their supreme leader when
they played the piece like they never did before. They played with
such bravado and ease they made the concerto one for them alone.
Each group player was a soloist and yet they rushed to give
support and accompaniment to each section when it was their time
to shine. And shine they did, like shooting stars across the sky.
Billy never heard them play with such grace, ease, dignity, and
strength of purpose. It almost became a love poem in which they
shared the reading. They became as one. When the final measure was
played, the audience immediately began to applaud like they would
hail and welcome an old friend. They didn't hold back their
appreciation for Maestro Billy or his orchestra. They each took
bow after bow. Billy motioned for each section to stand and
receive their portion of the glory. All in all, it was one of the
afternoon's most well received piece of music. The audience was on
a high. They were right where Billy hoped they might be for their
final piece.
* * * * * * *
Unknown to everyone except Billy, Polly, Cass, the orchestra and a
handful of Cowboy-Angels including Bossman Randy, were aware Billy
spent several days in his piano room in the Falcon's Lair where he
could enter a nether region and stop time for several hours and
never miss the rest of his day. During those precious hours of
escape from his every day routine, he composed a concerto for
Oolong and orchestra. Polly and Cass knew how to read music. They
learned the part quickly and actually read through it with the
orchestra on one of their impromptu clandestine practice
get-aways. Billy wrote the piece for his little brothers, Polly
and Cass, but they asked if their Maestro would consider allowing
the twin blue players with the yellow eyes, Evon and Elron Hi-yan
to premier the piece on their trip to Retikki Prime.
Billy thought it was a wonderful idea, but it meant Polly and Cass
would have to spend some time teaching them to read music notation
and how the parts should be played because most of their music was
improvised and created on the spot. His little brothers agreed to
spend a month with them as guests of the Lord High Chancellors and
their old Oolong master. Billy sent them with Boomer as their
escort and protection with a full holo-video of the orchestra
playing their part. All that was required of the blue twins was to
learn their parts and practice entrances. The twins, Castor and
Pollux, with their surrogate husband, Boomer, left early one
morning through a gate to the Palace on Retikki Prime. They spent
a relaxed, wonderful month on the planet, but when they returned
only one hour passed on Earth. They brought back news the blue
twins and their master were thrilled to premier Maestro Billy's
new composition. It would mean great popularity for them and their
master. It would also advance their careers and income on Retikki
Prime considerably.
* * * * * * * *
After the thunderous applause from the audience for the last piece
of music, Billy got the crowd settled down. “The last piece we
will play is something new and has never been played in public
before. Gentlemen, if you will be so kind...” Billy said to his
stage hands, and they took the cover off the large rectangular
object in the center of the stage to reveal a beautiful new
Oolong. The audience oohed and aahed. “The inspiration bee stung
me in my lazy butt this last month and in my spare time, which
ain't too often, I managed to write a concerto for orchestra and
two Oolong players. I originally wrote it for my two little
brothers, Pollux and Castor, but they asked me if I would consider
allowing their Oolong brothers on Retikki Prime, Evon and Elron
Hi-yan, to premier the piece for the first time. I thought it was
a wonderful idea. My little brothers, along with my husband, came
to Retikki Prime and spent a month teaching them to read our music
and to learn their parts for the concerto. My brothers and the
Hi-yan twins studied under the great Oolong virtuoso and teacher,
Master Luken Sporan. So without further ado, Evon and Elron, come
to the stage and take your places,” Billy said motioning to the
two blue twins sitting with his family.
The audience went crazy. They were about to hear a new piece of
music written by their hero and two of their home-boys were about
to premier it for them. How good was that? They decided to let
Billy, the blue-young men, and the orchestra know their joy. They
welcomed them to the stage with tumultuous applause.
The two young player took their places and knelt on soft cushions
slightly behind the large round instrument which looked like two
enormous 'OO's standing before them and took up their mallets.
Billy watched them carefully and they each nodded they were ready.
Billy gave the downbeat. The orchestra and the two soloist began
in unison making a lovely racket. Billy laid the ground-work of
his style in his first concerto for two baritones for his Byrd
men, and from the very first measures of the new concerto, it was
obvious to anyone who knew the least about music, he was building
on his style and expanding his horizons. The first movement was
loud, bold, brash, but lovely with its contrapuntal style and his
shifting keys. It was a monumental A-B-A construction which built
to a climax, relaxed for the middle part with a wonderful brass
accompaniment while the soloist played startling contrapuntal
subjects and answers in clever varieties. The last 'A' part was a
complete rethinking of the first two sections and ended in a huge
rush to the finish.
The second movement started slowly with strings while the soloist
played haunting melodies above the slow continuation of the
string. Then each section of the orchestra, from wind, brass,
percussion, piano, and finally the strings dropped out as the two
Oolong players finished the piece by themselves. It was a
stunningly beautiful movement.
The last movement was a raucous round-about piece Billy named
“Hoe-down” and it was just that; only, the two soloist became the
dancers and Billy gave them plenty material to showoff some of
their outstanding feats of playing their huge instruments. The
piece slowly built and continued to build until the very end.
While it started as a handsome trot, it got faster and faster with
every accelerated beat to climax in a dazzling finish in which
Billy pulled out all the stops. The last twenty bars were
humorously labeled by the composer as '...pants-on-fire.' The
audience's mouths were open, they were stunned by the orchestra
and the young Oolong players. When the final chords were played,
they stood for several seconds in awe. Finally, from way behind
the crowd someone yelled, “Holy shit and Hosanna Momma!”
“Hosanna, in the highest!” everyone shouted in response and then
began their thunderous uproar of applause. Billy waved to his
soloist and they took bow after bow. He motioned for his orchestra
to stand and take a bow. He motioned for Polly and Cass to
congratulate their brother Oolong players and the crowd continued
applauding as they shook hands and exchanged hugs. Billy called to
their Master Oolong teacher and motioned for him to stand in his
family's box. Billy and the audience applauded for the Maestro.
The crowd was so enthusiastic they applauded and called for Evon
and Elron, the two young players, to play an encore. They looked
at Maestro Billy, and he nodded his approval. They finished
playing three encores before they took their final bow and walked
off the stage. The second concert was over.
* * * * * * *
Vic Bodega jumped up from his chair and applauded vigorously with
the other members of the audience when the concerto ended, but he
maintained a sly grin on his face. Orin Sawin watched his buddy
closely, but he didn't comment right away. He was also applauding
and whistling for Maestro Billy's composing talent, and there was
no doubt in his mind Billy's new work was a stunning masterpiece.
While some modern music pushes boundaries, is heard and labeled as
cutting edge, and thus, is prophesied to become the new wave of
the art, is not always a sure bet.
While twelve-tone, serialism, was used from time to time by most
composers of the early Twentieth Century, it never seemed to catch
hold of the hearts and minds of the listening public. It took damn
near fifty years to grow out of the strangle-hold serial music
held on new music. Aside from the hard-core, inner circle of
serial music, there was an unpredictable ebb and flow of composers
who dabbled in the form from time to time, some more than others,
but it never truly caught on with the general public who are
always looking for something new and different.
It wasn't music the average amateur listener wanted to hear to
relax after a hard day at the office. One wag once said,'The best
part of popular music is, it doesn't stay popular long.' So it is
with certain periodic popular idioms in classical music. The proof
of greatness is those composers whose music lasts for centuries no
matter the idiom. For the last half of J. S. Bach's musical
career, his intrinsically beautiful contrapuntal work was
considered old fashioned. Bach's sons became more popular than
him, but today you rarely hear their works compared to their dear
old dad's output. True genius will live on for centuries. It never
dies while scores of popular note-mechanics' are rarely played and
rust over time in forgotten libraries. Orin Sawin saw Billy's work
as a maverick cutting his own road and carefully paving his way
into the history books of great composers among his many other
accomplishments.
“Well, ain't chu' gonna' ask me what I think about Daniels' latest
composition, Sweee-tea?” Bodega asked with humorous emphasis on
his cognomen for his friend, and grinned.
“I don't care what you think about it, Bull. Remind me to ask you
after you write your first major work and it's performed,” Sawin
said quietly and smiled sweetly. Bodega didn't miss his buddy's
challenge.
“Sometimes you can be such an insufferable cunt, Sawin,” Bodega
said.
“Only because you don't have answers for your own questions and
ask me like you really give a shit what I think. Do you want a
buddy who won't let you get away with bullshit or do you want a
lap dog what will always agree and lick your boots?” Orin asked.
“Ouch! Do I have to choose one or can I get both in one package?”
Bodega asked and laughed.
“Depends on how you play your cards, Bull. It's up to you,” Sawin
replied.
“With an attitude like that I don't have to ask your opinion. I
know what you think about it. You think that big cowboy is a
budding musical genius, and his shit don't stink,” Bodega said in
a jealous challenge.
“That only goes to show you how little you know me, Bodega. His
latest composition was better than the first. It was well thought
out and more readily conceived. Maestro Billy's slowly climbing a
ladder – not by leaps and bounds, but one rung at a time. He
learns more from each piece he writes, winnows out the chaff, and
adds more meat to the stew. I give him one year and his music will
flood the streaming classical and FM music stations. I'm glad we
came. It's sort of been a time-out, life changing experience for
us since we got our asses handed to us in a goat barn at Camp Air.
Have you given our situation much thought?” Sawin asked.
“Not much, but I ain't none too worried about it. I ain't as good
as you at multitasking. There's just too damn much input, what
with the different life styles, and being exposed to new races and
societies. The most amazing things is, they don't seem too much
different from us. They have the same basic needs and enjoy many
of the things we hold dear. Billy's idea of physically changing us
to become different men so's we wouldn't be recognized by our
previous employers is a strong draw to say nothing of steady work
for better than the pittance we were making. Hell he pays his
slave more than we were getting. Throw in his promise we won't
have to fear or suffer scrutiny from Big Brother, makes for a
complete package; however, I think we should wait and discuss it
with our team,” Bodega said.
“After we get back, I don't think you'll find anyone who might
entertain any thoughts about returning to Mother Hen,” Sawan said,
“I certainly know I don't plan to go back to that nest of liars
and neo-Nazis, whether the rest of you do or not. I have a chance
to become my own man, and the best proposition from another man I
was ever offered,” he added.
“What's this? I thought you would follow me anywhere, Orin?”
Bodega half-asked insincerely like he was a little hurt.
“You're right, I'll admit it. Before the Camp Air incident, I
would have followed you to the ends of the Earth. Now? Not so
much. There's just something about a big cowboy what's got his act
together that strums my magic twanger, Froggy, and if that
t'weren't enough, I got me a deep need to become a part of his
family. I'm convinced there's a place for me with them,” Sawin
replied and grinned.
The big man got a look of rejection on his face like his lover was
breaking up with him, “I could change, Little Darlin,'” Bull
Bodega said quietly.
“You could, but you won't – not until you birth your own star. I
wish I had time to wait to see that miracle occur, but I don't,”
Orin said like he lost hope in his leader.
Orin's quiet comment cut Bodega to the quick. It certainly shook
him up, but he didn't reply. He allowed his mind to mull-over the
idea of his life without the nuisance of his smaller friend who
was always ragging on his ass to become more than the limited
effort Victory Bullet Bodega was willing to put out. He thought
his cognomen of his friend as his own 'Jiminy Cricket' he kept in
his pocket close to his heart was apropos. He remembered a couple
of lines from an old Disney song, 'When a star is born, they
possess a gift or two. They have the power to make a wish come
true.' Bodega didn't want to admit it, but somehow he knew for
certain without his own personal Jiminy Cricket he would never see
his dreams come true.
The strangest feeling came over him when he suddenly felt a cold
chilled run up his spinal chord from his coccyx to his cerebral
cortex playing his vertebra like a well-tempered saw fiddle. He
shuddered like a rabbit ran over his grave as the electric shock
reached the top of his skull, radiated out in all directions. He
threw back his head and his eyes rolled back into his head for him
to read a flaming sign slowly crossing his brain like an old
barnstormer with a long banner advertising a Western Auto Store.
The message read: “Don't hesitate! Don't struggle! Don't be afraid
to love! Let it be! Become what he needs and you will have more
joy than you could ever imagine!” It was at that moment, Bodega
realized he would be eternally damned if he didn't slip a net
under the little fish caught on his hook struggling in the water
next to his boat. All he had to do was bring him on board.
“Aside from hottest sex I've ever had with anyone of either sex,
with which neither of us have a problem, what would it take to win
your heart, Jiminy Cricket, and make you my love slave like them
master/slaves in Master Billy's family?” Bull Bodega whispered and
bussed a kiss behind his smaller buddy's ear.
“A barnyard concerto for orchestra with a movement named 'Evening,
with Crickets,'” Orin replied and smiled.
* * * * * * *
Everyone was exhausted after the final concert and headed back to
the great castle in the mountains. The entertainment manager made
sure ropes were in place for their guests to more easily walk back
to the mag-amp-lift without swimming their way though the crowds.
They lined the way on either side of the ropes to get a glimpse of
their favorite orchestra players, applauding, and making noise to
get their attention. They were very much like fans on Earth, but a
little more polite and reserved. After they returned to the
castle, Billy's people relaxed and were enjoying treats before
traveling back through the gates to Earth. Billy and his men
attended one final meeting with the representatives from the other
worlds. Several speeches of admiration and respect were made, and
then they got down to business one final time. While it was one of
the shorter meetings, it happened to be the most informative and
productive. Billy's uncle-in-law's asked if he was pleased with
the Cat-Men?
“Yes, we are quite pleased with them, Sire, and so are my people.
Our younger set are taken with them. We have to be careful not to
expose them to the general public, but we will eventually. We
don't want them to feel like prisoners. We're optimistic we can
work with them and gradually integrate them with our other unusual
critters to gain public acceptance as time goes on. As a matter of
fact, we would appreciate a full-clowder, or complete
platoon-compliment of twelve more to increase our number to
eighteen if they are available and willing, and you should wish to
grant us such a boon. My people are always looking for biological
resources which don't injure our planet, and we have found their
urine is damn-near a hundred percent pure ammonia. My techs
collect their Cat-man-dew, refine it somewhat and use it as a
refrigerant in high-compression cooling machines. The chemical
we're now using destroys our ozone layer which protects our planet
from gamma rays emitted by our sun. We have many changes to make
on our planet and discoveries like Cat-man-dew may very well save
our home world,” Billy said.
The great Pharaoh's right-hand man, Setee, started to arise to
make some comments, but Bubba Ho-tep motioned for him to remain
seated, and spoke quietly to him. Setee remained in his seat with
a petulant scowl on his face like a scolded child. The large
potentate slowly rose from his chair, stood looking around the
table at everyone, smiled and began to speak. “We can't remember
visiting another world outside our system which has brought us
greater pleasure and a wonderful opportunity to make new friends
in such a short period of time. The other civilizations
represented around this table have been exemplary in their concern
and interest trying to make cogent and sensible suggestions for
the good people of Earth. They are to be commended for their
compassion, understanding, and wise counsel.
“We would like to extend an invitation to the Daniels family and
their representatives to keep in touch with us should they need
further counseling or might require assistance to bring about
their quiet revolution. We wish the people from Earth good fortune
in their endeavors. We were particularly impressed with the artful
music Maestro Billy Daniels and his talented family have shared
with us. Like a new star takes on fuel to shine brightly, so we
see the Daniels family and those of several other compatible
species who have joined with them to create a greater family as a
new dynasty in the universe which will grow stronger and bring a
new light of hope to their world. Thank you one and all,” Bubba
Ho-Tep said. Everyone in the great hall stood and applauded the
Pharaoh.
Billy arose from his chair and stood for a moment taking in
the wonderful faces of a number of new friends he and his family
met. “Cowboys rarely talk much around folks they don't know well.
They are usually quiet, reserved, and somewhat shy about voicing
their opinions least their words might be misconstrued, taken the
wrong way, or they might offend someone. For the most part they
keep their opinions to themselves unless they come to know you
well. Many a cowboy in the early West was killed in a barroom gun
fight when tempers, fueled by rot-gut whiskey, rose to deadly
anger from a difference of opinion. Fortunately, we have come a
long way since those dark days, and today we are capable of
considering and discussing other ideas from many sources. I hope
my words are not taken as gratuitous flattery when I say we
appreciate every opinion, idea, and suggested resource you good
people have shared with us during our meetings. We will be
eternally grateful for your help, and we hope we have gained
several friends and allies. Thank you for sharing your time,
wisdom, friendship, and most of all, your genuine concern for us
and our planet,” Billy said. Everyone stood and applauded.
The meeting came to an end, and as in every society, people stood
around for an hour or more talking, telling stories, and saying
more words of praise, farewell, and promises to keep-in-touch.
Bubba Ho-Tep managed to get away from Setee's band of
true-believers and spoke quietly to Billy and the men standing
around him. “I think now would be a perfect time to announce our
good fortune. My Queen will be joining us in a few minutes. Would
you and your men stay for a few minutes after everyone has left
the hall?” Ho-Tep asked.
“We will be pleased to stay, your Majesty,” Billy said.
“I will also invite your Uncle-in-laws to meet with us as a
greater assurance to our religious cast,” he added.
“I know our uncles will appreciate your gesture, Sire,” Billy
responded.
Queen Isis arrived at the great hall with her entourage, but this
time she was accompanied by the Daniels women still dressed in
their colorful muu-muus. Queen Isis was wearing her own wonderful
muu-muu. She never looked more radiant and beautiful. The men
applauded their entrance. It was a lovely gesture of unity between
the Queen and her new friends. Bubba Ho-Tep offered his wife his
hand, she came to him, and they embraced. When they finally broke
apart, he offered his arm, and she stood next to him.
“We have something of great joy to share with you good people,” he
said, “My wife is with child, and we have been assured, it will be
a prince for our family; an heir to my throne,” he said and beamed
at his beautiful wife. Everyone in the room applauded for the
couple in their joy.
Ho-tep was right. His timing for the announcement was spot on. It
couldn't have been staged better. The religious cast went bananas
and were all smiles. They didn't have any problem with Bubba, his
wife and a couple of guards remaining behind to speak in private
with the Lord High Chancellors and the Daniels family. Billy and
Boomer's uncles, The Lord High Chancellors, were like two old
maids and were almost comical in their sincere concern for Mrs.
Ho-tep, but when they learned Billy and his Cowboy-Angels
confirmed her pregnancy, they knew there was a good deal more to
the story they would hear later. Very little passed the two big
giants. They loved a juicy bit of gossip and savored benign
intrigue as long as it wasn't in their realm.
The rest of the company disbursed to go their way, including the
religious cast of the Etheropteans, but most of the major players
in the Daniels family remained behind with the two Lord High
Chancellors to say their final goodbyes. They agreed to exchange
coordinates with each other for easy access to their worlds should
either need the others help in an emergency. Madam Ho-tep asked if
Billy and his family, including her earthly sisters, might come to
her in six months and again when she gave birth to her son. She
almost shed tears like she was afraid to depend on the royal cast
for her physicians. Billy assured her they would be pleased and
honored to grant her request, and went further to tell them if she
had any problems to feel free to contact them. Lady Ho-Tep was
consoled and comforted by Master Billy's words and her husband was
even more so.
The Pharaoh summoned Major Bart Langstrom to speak to him in
person. Bart walked up to the large man and fell on his knees
before him. Bubba Ho-Tep offered his hand and Bart took it. He
pulled Bart up into his arms, and gently kissed him on his
forehead. “Thank you, my Son, for saving the life of your new son
on Ahwetoe-Menipata. I couldn't imagine two finer men to father
young Oran Daniels,” he said quietly so only a small group of
Billy's family could hear.
“We meant to keep the bad part from you and your lovely wife, your
Majesty,” Bart replied.
“We know. We appreciate the compassion, care, and heroism you men
displayed on your away mission,” Ho-Tep said.
“It was nothing, Sire. We would have done the same for the least
of your flock,” Bart said.
“I'm well aware of that, my handsome brother,” Bubba Ho-Tep
replied, reached into the pocket of his robe, pulled out his
beautiful emerald signet ring with the Ho-Tep royal sign carefully
engraved in the beautiful stone. He slipped it on Bart's middle
finger. “This is a gift for your valor, your intelligence, your
compassion, and quick thinking. Wear it when you come to our
planet and you will be treated as a member of my royal family,” he
said, pulled Bart to him again, and kissed him one more time on
his forehead.
“I'm overwhelmed, your Majesty, I will wear it with pride and
honor, Sire,” Bart said choking up, but he maintained his military
bearing. Billy and his family applauded for Bart.
The Pharaoh called Billy to him and did the same with him, only
his ring had a blood ruby with the Ho-Tep royal sign engraved on
it. The ruby was enormous. Billy was also deeply moved when Bubba
Ho-Tep called him his brother.
* * * * * * *
Bossman Randy was in somewhat of a quandary about how the
Etheroptean's chose to display their gratitude for the staggering
amount of work and compassion he and the Daniels family put in to
set their lives straight and taking on the huge responsibility of
one of their rejected children. The two rings were nice, but Randy
remembered seeing a dozen or more rings just like them or larger
discovered in the cave filled with treasure around the outside of
Captain Nick's ship. He sighed deeply and remembered what Billy
told him about not expecting returns. He hoped his big brother
knew what he was doing.
Randy didn't have any problem with his salary from the treasury on
Retikki Prime. Each orchestra member was paid in gold coins. Billy
knew it would be how they paid his orchestra and urged his members
to join his family's Credit Union so they could have accounts
through which they could exchange their gold for cash or they
could leave some in gold. Each got twenty gold coins and five more
if they were a soloist on any piece. Randy and his sister each got
twenty-five coins because they were soloist in the Brandenburg
Concertos. Some questioned the small amount for going off world.
Those in the know laughed at them.
“Each coin is worth ten thousand dollars on our planet,” they were
told by the others, “That's a hundred thousand for each
performance. How much did you get paid last year with the Houston
Philharmonic?” they asked. They knew the answer was well under
fifty thousand for the year not including practice fees. Living in
the days of severe austerity, they weren't paid practice fees.
They made more in two performances on Retikki Prime than they
would in four years playing in Houston. Needless to say, they
quickly changed their opinion. Billy and Jesse were paid the
highest. They both conducted and played solos. Harlen complained
he would have to hire another houseman to take care of him if
Jessie kept bringing in such large sums from his music abilities.
Billy and his family laughed at him.
End of Chapter 98 ~ Seek Him What Made Them Seven Stars
Copyright ~ © ~ 2017 ~ Waddie Greywolf ~ All Rights Reserved
E-mail: Waddie Greywolf <[email protected])
WC = 23,688
07/04/2016
01/20/2017
* * * * * * *
Charles Ives: The Unanswered Question ~ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbArUJBRRJ0
Lucas Foss ~ Piano Concerto #2 ~ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEQTKIToF5M
Terry Riley In C (Mali) : ~ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aX96z7AuICs
Philip Glass: Akhnaten: First Act ~ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EAiv-LU82t4
Alberto Ginastera Piano Concerto #1 ~ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M1GEjMIGPTo
Andrew Norman: Play: Level 1 ~ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c9DLBag6H1s
Bela Bartok: Concerto for Orchestra 1945 ~ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C68SkzGb6Ww