I love the summer more than any other season. The best part is sitting on my rocking chair out on the porch, enjoying a tall glass of iced tea, and listening to the sounds of silence. No, not the old song from the 1960s. No, I mean the sweet sound of nothing from where I sit to the ridge two miles away but grass, trees, and absolutely no people.
My Victorian mansion dates to an era over a century ago, a time when coal barons ruled over the area. Through no effort of mine, I ended up as the sole heir to the former owner, and my days living in the bustling big city came to an end. I never dreamed that being out in the country would fit my lifestyle. Nonetheless, trading the urban noise for rural peace and quiet saved my sanity and played right into my fascination.
A solitary road bisected the pristine hillside to separate the green forest of maples from my front porch. The road provided access to both sides of town. On the eastern direction, the aging downtown tried to hold on to the old memories. On the western side were newer ticky tack houses occupied by middle-class families mostly of child-rearing age. Of note, the local middle school, build in the same year as my mansion, sat at the bottom of my hill.
During the school year, some kids used my road as a shortcut between the two areas. Most avoided climbing the hill, especially when riding a bike. The leg-killing ascent wasn't worth the terrifying descent. However, a few trekked past on a regular basis. Catching sights of their smiling faces and youthful enthusiasm excited me. If they exhibited slender, bare legs or tight tops, well, that was a bonus.
That was the normal situation during the school year. But come summer and even those few hikers dried up. My guilty pleasure went on hiatus. Except for the carnival days.
For two weeks and three weekends, centered around the end of July and beginning of August, I had neighbors. Unwanted neighbors. The fucking traveling carnival set up shop at the middle school. A couple dozen roaring rides screeched from morning until night. Countless screaming people rode those monstrosities. Couple that with the blaring noise they passed off as festive music blasted from the site. Then there was the smell of badly fried food, the odor from petting zoo animals, and stench from overly used port-o-potties.
Needless to say, I wasn't a fan. In fact, if I could fly away to a deserted island getaway, I would book it tomorrow. Unfortunately, I did have commitments. So I was stuck. Grrrr!
So it was on that Tuesday morning. Taking a break from my computer, I sat, enjoying the not yet hot day. Just at ten, the rides fired up for their relentless run. And screams emanated from the roller coaster. With a loud sigh, I closed my eyes, hoping to transport myself to that island, and failing that, return to my work. Then I heard it.
"Hey there, Mr. G."
I knew the voice. My preteen angel, April, gave me that nickname, finding my real name unpronounceable. I had to agree with her there.
April McDonald considered my road her personal walkway. The friendly eleven-year-old always waved at me as she strolled by. Eventually, she stopped and struck up a conversation. As Bogie once said. "It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship."
Looking up, I spied my little chum dressed in a flowery halter top and white Daisy Dukes. The combination showed off her long slender limbs, getting a decent tan for the middle of summer. The two garments didn't quite meet, allowing her cute little belly button to peek out. Her short blonde hair sneaked out from under the back of her baseball cap.
"Looking good, kid," I called out. That's when I noticed two others tagging a few steps behind her. The trio climbed up my steps and stood in front of my chair.
"Mr. G. These are my friends, Julee and Autumn. We're heading for the carnival."
That was obvious, I thought. I said nothing, instead taking time to examine my new acquaintances. Julee could have passed as April's twin, except her hair was more of a dirty blonde. Her halter was light aqua in color and her denim shorts a bit longer. Still she had great legs.
The other girl, Autumn, was younger and less daring in dress. Her medium gray tee proclaimed her elementary school and almost reached her knees. Perhaps she'd grow into it before getting to high school. Her uneven mousy brown hair appeared to have been last hacked shorter. Then she smiled, and I cringed at the missing tooth. She also only had one arm showing.
"Ah, glad to meet you," I said. The girls didn't respond verbally, but instead nervously glanced at each other.
Did I miss something, I thought. Then I looked at Autumn again. While the other two exhibited small mounds in the chest area, the younger girl had a larger lump much lower, extending across her belly. I also noticed a white strap behind her neck.
"Is something…wrong?" I asked.
"We need to ask you a favor," said April. The possibilities flooded my brain, none sounded fun…for me.
"You see, my sister hurt her shoulder," said Julee. "It's nothing bad, just a little sore. It should be healed, but for now, she can't go on any rides."
"All right," I drawled, waiting for the other shoe to drop…on my toe.
"Julee's just turned twelve, and I can act old enough," said April. "We can ride by ourselves. But Autumn would have to just watch us. And we can't really leave her alone."
I saw the problem. And the obvious solution. I was getting hijacked to attend a carnival I detested to watch over a girl I just met. "All right. I'll just turn off my computer and be ready to go."
"Why do you need to do that?" asked April. She paused for a moment before realizing my proposal. "Oh, we didn't need you to come."
"I don’t…" I must have put on my WTF face to show my confusion.
"We thought…" started Julee. "We thought you could watch her here. April said you're nice. Especially with her and Mae."
If I were standing I would have fallen over. I didn't anticipate that at all. Nor did I expect to have mentioned the last friend of April's I met and invited into my house.
"Please," plead all three girls in unison.
"Well, all right." At any rate, this solution would be cooler.
"Thanks, Mr. G.," called the older pair as they bolted off the porch and down the road. "We'll be back before dinner."
"I guess it's just us," I said. "Want to come inside?"
"Oh yes," said the little girl with her goofy grin.
I took a deep breath. This was turning into the most unusual carnival ever.
As much as I appreciate the beauty of young girls, I don't go trawling for them and rarely entertain. Having no family of my own, I don't stock a closet filled with toys and games to keep them busy. Again, I jumped into a situation while thinking with the wrong head.
"Wow!" exclaimed Autumn as she stepped across the threshold. "This is some room."
The day I inherited the mansion, I was living in a studio apartment with a couple of mismatched pieces of furniture and very little attachment to them. Since the house came complete with scads of antique pieces, I just moved in, leaving everything the way it was. I'm certainly no decorator and preferred not disturbing the place.
"Who is that in the picture?" asked my guest.
"No idea," I answered truthfully. "Maybe my great-grandmother or something."
"She's pretty. Who's he?" She pointed to the matching portrait.
"Same answer, though he's probably her husband. They came with the house."
She flitted around the room like a hummingbird on speed. Everything, no matter how insignificant got an ooh or an aah, especially, for no apparent reason, the fireplace.
After visiting every nook and cranny in the room, we continued with the dining room, my remodeled kitchen, the back entrance and mud room, and the fancy parlor. When she completed her examination, giving them a seal of approval, we ventured upstairs. There I showed off my master bedroom and en suite along with three guest bedrooms. Autumn displayed so much delight for one that I expected her to move in. Not that I would mind, necessarily, though her family might miss her. Preteens have such a joie de vivre.
When she finally tired of trying every bed by bouncing on them, we headed for the third floor. I rarely ventured up there. Living alone, I found keeping just the rooms I used clean to be a nightmare.
In the first room, we found all of the furniture covered in sheets. "Is this where the ghosts live?" she asked.
"Perhaps, but I haven't seen any around recently."
"Silly. You can't see ghosts. They're unvisible."
I chuckled at her choice of words. The girl was growing on me.
"So what was this room?"
"I think it was the old man's office. He ran his coal company from up here. He could look out the window and keep track of the activity in town."
"Oooh, let me see." She ran to the window and peered through the dirt-encrusted glass.
"And here's a secret door to his private library." I pushed the clasp on the bookcase, and it swung open."
"Aahh."
"And here's another door out to the turret."
"Wow." She entered the round room and peered out that window. "I can see the top of the Ferris wheel from here." She began waving and giggling. "Just in case Julee and April were looking this way. I wonder if they're having as much fun as I am."
Such imagination.
When her hand got tired, we retraced our steps and crossed to the back of the house. "This was the nursery and playroom," I said.
She studied the room with the myriad of antique dust-covered toys on equally dust-covered tables. "Is this where his kids played?"
"I assume so. I believe he had two girls around your age and an older boy."
"Why is it so dusty?"
I shrugged. "My guess would be they closed it up after the girls…they died."
The bouncing girl froze in mid-bounce, her face turning white. "They…died." I saw a tear crawl down her cheek, followed by a torrent.
"I'm sorry," I said as I took her in my arms, trying to comfort her. "It's all right. It was a long time ago." I remembered just how fragile a girl's nature was and the wide ranges of emotions could be.
After a good long minute, the tears slowed down. "They really died?"
I nodded. "That happened back then, but we have better medicine now."
"I…I think I've had enough exploring for today."
I released my embrace and let her down gently. As we walked to the door, she turned to me. "Thank you for holding me. I don't like to be sad, but you were just like a real daddy."
I took that as a compliment. Mark up another reason I love preteens so much.
Down in the Great Room, as the realtor described it, we sat quietly. I ran through all of the possible ideas for cheering her up. I was sure if April and Julee showed up, they'd never trust me again. And I would never babysit in that town again. Giving up on my rejections, I asked, "What would you like to do?"
"I don't know," she said, her chin buried in her chest.
"Do you like cards?" I knew I had a pack squirreled away somewhere.
Autumn sat up. "Do you play Go Fish?"
"I think I remember it. I'm not very good. You'll probably beat the pants off me." That made her giggle, though I wasn't sure why. Then she nodded, the best sign I'd seen since we returned.
I searched through the drawers of the secretary and found an unopened pack. "Want to adjourn to the dining room?"
"I like this room better. Please."
"No problem." Thinking fast, I cleared off a side table and positioned it next to her chair. While I brought my chair over I said, "I'm a little rusty. What are the rules again?"
I knew perfectly well the rules, but I wanted her to feel like she was in charge.
She gave me a rundown of how to play. "You'll have to do all the dealing." She waved her good arm at me.
"Are you going to able to hold the cards?" I thought about needing to hold the cards and pass them at the same time, only using one hand. Perhaps this was a horrible suggestion after all.
"I can try." She certainly was a game little girl.
I took the deck and removed the cards five through nine. That would make a quicker and easier game. Then I dealt the first hand.
Autumn proved rather dexterous while handling the cards. A little older and she could be a card shark. I did confuse her by calling 2s a deuce and 3s a trey. But we got over that problem easily.
During the fourth hand, having lost the first three to her, I noticed her glancing over her shoulder in the direction of the fireplace. "What are you looking for?" I suspected a mirror showing my cards.
"The puppies."
I screwed up my face. "Puppies?"
"Yeah. Puppies. I heard April and that other girl talking to Julee and saying something about puppies in the fireplace. They said they were really, really fun."
I put my cards down and sat back, totally confused. Puppies? I never had a pet, not in the mansion, not as a kid, not in between. I did have a friend who had a cat, but never a canine. The closest things I had to a dog were the firedogs to hold my logs. And…
The light bulb went on over my head, 2000 watts. "Do you mean the firedogs?"
"Yeah. Are they like Dalmatians?"
I started laughing, bringing a confused expression to my guest. "The other girl was Mae?"
"That sounds right. So why are firedogs so fun?"
The last time April brought a friend over, a few months before, it was Mae Stinson. I had used the flames in the fireplace to mesmerize the two girls before we had fun together. I used the word "firedog" as the post-hypnotic suggestion trigger to put them under in the future. I figured that was one word that rarely came up in conversation.
"What did they tell you?" I asked.
"Just something about puppies and kitties having fun together. That's all."
Perhaps I hadn't cleared their memories as much as I thought. I glanced at the fireplace. There was no way I was building a fire on a 100 degree day.
While I thought, my grandfather clock rang out with the noon chimes.
"Are you hungry?" Autumn nodded. "Let's go make some lunch."
When she agreed, I felt better. Now I had another half hour to figure out my next step. I had never felt so clueless.
I stared at the girl sitting across from me at the dining table. In a few short hours, she had charmed me like few had before. Now I wanted to do something for her.
Before her she had a tuna sandwich, cut up in fourths so she could eat them with one hand and a glass of chocolate milk. In the latter I had crushed a little white pill, the effect being a heightened degree of suggestibility. In the past I added another for increasing blood flow, but that wasn't my goal this time. I was happy to see the milk disappear.
While we ate, I made small talk. "Your sister is twelve. How old are you?"
"Nine. I'll be ten in October. I'm still too young for middle school. I wish I had a summer birthday."
"I'm sorry." That didn't go too well. "How did you hurt your arm?"
"I fell while playing tag with Sam."
"Oh, is he your boyfriend?"
She wrinkled up her nose. "Sam's a girl. Duh."
Two strikes. "I'm sorry. Not that she's a girl, but that I made the wrong assumption."
I changed the subject again. "How long do you have to rest your shoulder?"
She shrugged mostly with her good shoulder. "The doctor said it should be fine by now. I'm just afraid it will hurt if I use it. I don't like being hurt."
"If I'm gentle, would you let me try something?" She nodded. "Let's finish up lunch first. All right?" She nodded again.
At least I didn't strike out. But now I needed another plan.
The clock rang out the half hour. I started calculating how long until the girls arrived. Time keeps marching along.
Another light bulb went off. Of course, time was the answer. My answer. Even though I had never tried it, I put my hope in using time. And my willing guest.
"When you finish, come join me in the other room."
"All right."
I entered the Great Room with great expectations. I had tried hypnosis on others since I was in my teens. The results varied, but had been getting more consistent. Each variable made the uncertainty inevitable. But exciting.
I positioned one of the big couch pillows in front of the grandfather clock. After trying it out, I opened the lower door on the clock, exposing the pendulum. Then I waited.
A few minutes later, Autumn slunk into the room. She stared at the pillow and then at me. "What are they for?"
"For sitting on. I don't like the hardwood floor. My ass isn't used to a hard surface." My guest giggled with me using the bad word. I took that as an encouraging sign.
"Are you sure it won't hurt?"
"I'll be as gentle as possible. If you don't like it, just tell me and I'll stop."
"Okay."
I took a seat on the pillow, crossing my legs in front of me. Extending my hand, I invited her to sit on my lap. "How is it so far?"
"Daddy has me sit on his lap sometimes too. It makes me feel all warm and tingly."
I wondered what went on at their house. Tossing that thought aside, I put my arms around the girl. "I don't want you to fall over."
"Thanks."
"Do you see the end of the pendulum going back and forth?"
"Of course."
"What color is it?"
"Gold?" She sounded like I was crazy for such a simple question.
"Right. You are going to watch it until it turns green. But I need you to stare at it until it does. Don't look anywhere else. When it turns green, squeeze my hand."
"All right." She still sounded a bit doubtful, but took my hand anyway.
"Can you hear my voice?"
Autumn giggled. "Of course."
"Good. You will listen to my voice and my voice only. And no laughing. This is serious, if you don't want your shoulder to hurt."
Without a word she sat up straight. She was listening.
I began the aural commands, the gentle tone synchronized with the constant rocking. Though the pendulum method was new, I had done it before with other shiny objects.
It took a few minutes until her mind fell away, and I knew she totally relaxed. I figured I had no reason to rush. Small steps, I kept saying to myself.
"Autumn, can you hear me?" She nodded. "Can you speak?" She again nodded. "Please answer with your voice."
"I hear you and can speak."
"Did the gold disk turn green?"
"Not yet. I'm still watching and waiting."
I smiled to myself. That was the perfect answer. "Please stand up." She rose from my lap. I had miscalculated the tail of her shirt being trapped. After rolling it up above her waistband, I said "Please sit down." She resumed her position in my lap.
"I'm going to remove your shirt. Raise your free arm over your head." She did and a moment later, Autumn sat in my lap topless. "Lower your arm and put your hand in your lap."
With that limb out of the way, I turned to the injured arm. The blue canvas sling supported the arm across her belly with a white strap around the back of her neck. From the back, the shoulder appeared not bruised. I hoped the doctor was right.
"Your arm is feeling very healthy. It is much better than when you hurt it. It feels so good it wants to float away. It will float until I say stop."
I watched the elbow start to rise. Because of the sling, the rest of the arm stayed horizontal. I waited until the elbow reached shoulder lever before I said, "Stop."
With it in front of her face, I continued. "Does it hurt at all?" She shook her head. "Are you ready to lose the sling?" This time she nodded. "Then put your chin on your chest." When she did, I lifted the strap over her head and let it fall loose. "Raise your chin and straighten your elbow." Her hand drifted away from her face. "Now let the hand fly into the sky." The hand raised until the arm pointed at the ceiling. "Let the hand float down and land in your lap."
With both hands in her lap, I felt good about my experiment. "Please stand and let the sling fall away. Then sit down again."
With the sling on the floor, I had her move the shoulder through every motion I could think. None of them proved painful except for the stiffness of being disused. Satisfied, I checked the time. Still mid-afternoon. As long as she was under, I'd obtain my payment.
"Autumn, you have done well. Now we are going to wait for your sister. While we do, we can play games. You like games, don’t you?" She nodded her agreement. "For one, we may be without clothes. While you are in this house, you will not fear being naked, or consider it wrong. If anyone else is naked, you will not think that wrong either. Do you understand?"
"Yes," she said. "I like being naked."
"Good. While you are in this house, you may play a game where you touch someone or they touch you. You may not hurt anyone, and they should not hurt you. If you feel hurt, you tell them to stop. Likewise if someone tells you to stop, you must stop then. Do you understand?"
"Yes," she said. "I don’t like being hurt and won't hurt anyone else."
When I say the word, "catbird", you will wake from this state, the gold disk having turned green. If I say the word "firedog", you will return to this state and remember the rules. While you are out of the state, you will not tell anyone what happened. Do you understand?"
"Yes," she said. "I like being in this state with you."
"Please stand and turn toward me."
Autumn stood and pirouetted, giving me the first view of her front. She could easily been passed off as a boy, flat-chested and with a straight torso. Those curves would come later. Her dime-sized areolas barely stood out from the rest of her unblemished pink skin. She was a beauty, toothy grin and all.
"What would you like to do?" I asked.
"Learn about puppies and kitties, like April talked about."
"I was hoping you'd say that."
I took her hand and headed up the stairs. I knew just the perfect place for such a lesson.
As we ascended the stairs to the second floor, I wasn't sure who showed more nervousness. Even under her spell, little Autumn faced an unknown, one her fellow schoolmates acted out with their dolls. She held my hand tight enough to stop the blood flow. As for this old codger, I contemplated turning around and pulling out the cards for more Go Fish. Was this delicate child ready for the lesson I had to teach?
For our classroom, I selected the front guest room. My master remained my sole domain. Using a different bed allowed me to tidy up at my leisure. Choosing the front provided for an early warning from anyone arriving via the road, just in case the carnival goers returned unexpectedly. At least, that's what my hormone-driven brain reasoned.
Like TV sitcom teens, we sat facing each other, an arm's length apart with a leg dangling off the edge. I spent the quiet moment to admire her youthful beauty, untouched innocence, and primal desire for intimacy. If I only had the skill or talent to capture those aspects, I'd be more famous than Rodin.
"You have beautiful skin," I said. The girl blushed slightly, almost like leaves changing colors. I knew of no forest of oak and maple that the first frost could transform their collective foliage to appear anymore glorious than the simple purity exhibited by the preteen holding my hand.
"Autumn, scoot closer to me."
As she did, I bent forward with my head passing beside hers. I breathed in, detecting the faint trace of watermelon shampoo. To me, that aroma exceeded the fanciest imported perfumes. "You smell perfect," I said, getting a giggle for my compliment.
Sitting upright, I continued. "Have you ever kissed anyone?"
"Just Daddy and Mommy. Oh, there was Aunt Eloise last Christmas. She said it was our special, secret present."
"Did you like that one?"
"It made my tummy all tumbly. When she stopped, I wanted her to do it again and again. But she said doing it only a little made it special. She also said not to tell anybody." The girl put her hand over her mouth. "Oh, I forgot to keep the secret."
"That's all right, Autumn. I won't tell." Not with what I had planned.
I leaned forward again, this time with my lips pursed. And touched them to her forehead. I gave her a soft peck.
"Hey, that isn't where you kiss," she protested.
"I can kiss you anywhere, and I believe you will enjoy it." I used my commanding voice and noticed her head acknowledged my suggestion. I repeated my action to her forehead, and this time she smiled.
Sliding closer I kissed her brow, her temple, her rosy cheek, the tip of her nose, and finally her pale lips. That combination elicited a soft moan. Remaining there, I kissed once, twice, thrice. Then I rubbed our noses together followed with a longer fourth contact.
Sitting back, I could see her moist eyes, not quite real tears of joy yet.
"Now open your lips a little." On the next touch, I added the tip of my tongue. "Did you like that?"
"Just like Aunt Eloise."
I was appreciating that woman. "Let's try a game. I call it Follow the Leader. Just do what I do. Okay?" She nodded while squirming to get a better seat.
I followed my previous path, starting at the forehead, pausing after each for Autumn to shift into position for hers. The first few were tentative. Soon she began more sure of herself. With the new confidence kicking in, I reached her mouth. With the subsequent kisses, I changed the depth of insertion between her lips. She caught on, and we began a battle of tongues. Autumn displayed raw natural lingual talent.
When we paused, she began lightly stroking her exposed stomach. "It's like a butterfly in there."
"Want more?"
"Oh, yes."
I returned to her mouth, but after a few light pecks, I continued to her cheek. Surprised by the new target, she planted a sloppy one on mine. "Just wait and learn," I whispered. I moved to her chin for a pair, then to her other cheek, her nose, her mouth, the chin again, her neck under her ear for three in a row, and then the outside of the ear. This last one made her shudder at the feathery touch.
"Are you all right?" I asked.
"Just a whole bunch of butterflies all at once."
"Did you like the feeling?" She nodded with a smile. "Then let me show you more."
I started tracing around the ear's helix with a circle of nips, following it with a similar set including my tongue tip. As she moaned, I spiraled my target in, finally giving a French kiss treatment to the sensitive tragus.
"Ooh," she whispered, almost collapsing in my arms.
I shifted, moving behind her, almost drawing a line across the nape of her neck. Crawling on the bed allowed me access to her other ear which I gave the same treatment. Continuing my circumnavigation of the preteen, I returned to her mouth. By the time I settled, Autumn gave in and fell into my arms.
"Those are the hugest butterflies ever," she said as she recovered. With the doe-like eyes, she asked, "Is that what fucking is like?"
Her choice of wording shocked me. Not for the word, but my realization this tiny preteen was not as naïve as I imagined. "Yes, only even better."
"Then can we…fuck?"
"Not today. We have to work up to it. And you need to be older. Maybe when you reach Julee's age. Then your body will be ready."
"All right," she said, though with a shade of disappointment in her voice. "Just remember you promised."
Small steps, I told myself. I have plenty of time in the future. Just stick to kissing for now.
The grandfather clock rang out the four o'clock hour just as the front door flew open. "Caught you," cried out April as she and Julee burst inside. "Damn."
From the Great Room, I turned around. "How was the carnival?"
"Brilliant," said Julee as the new arrivals joined us at the makeshift card table. "We road everything, including the Ferris wheel twice."
"Only twice?" I asked.
"Yeah," said April. "Did you know you can see your house from the top?"
I laughed at her information. "I haven't been on a Ferris wheel in years."
"So what did you two do?" asked Julee.
"We played lots of Go Fish. He never had any twos. I think he cheats." Autumn folded her cards together and tossed them on the table.
Julee stared at her sister with both arms exposed from her gray tee. "Wait a second. Where's your sling?"
"I talked your brave sister into trying to go without it. It made a big difference with playing cards."
While Julee examined Autumn's shoulder, April snuck over to me. "Enjoy yourself?" whispered the girl. I simply nodded with a huge smile on my face.
Satisfied her sister was healthy again, Julee said, "This is good news. Maybe we all can go back on Thursday like we planned. I'm sure Mommy will let Autumn go."
After the cheering subsided, the girls headed toward home. I stood on the porch and waved to them as they skipped away. Once again, my life could return to normal.
From my rocking chair, I thought about the day. All my life, I had loved the summer. Now I realized I could not wait for Autumn to return.
