Oscar Meyers Part 2: Academia By Lazlo Zalezac Copyright (C) Lazlo Zalezac, 2005 Chapter 26 Carrying a rather large piece of luggage, Oscar strolled down the hallway as if he owned the hotel. The hallway was basically bare; painted in a dull white. Every thirty feet, the walls were broken by pairs of doors that faced an identical pair of doors on the other side of the hallway. The floor was covered with a commercial carpet intended to be unnoticed while hiding stains and dampening noise. After walking more than half the length of the hallway, Oscar arrived at his room. He checked the number against that written in the paper folder that held the plastic key. He set down his luggage and removed the plastic key from the paper folder. Bending over to examine the mechanism, he slipped the plastic card into the slot across the top of the lock. The red light changed green and he opened the door. Holding the door open with one foot, he picked up his luggage. The door of the room across the hallway rattled, but he ignored it. He suspected that it was security for the man in the room next to his. He entered the room and let the door slam closed behind him. He dropped the luggage in front of the door. He went over to the door to the connecting room and opened it. He was surprised to find that the door on the other side was already open. He called out, “Hello the room.” “Come in Oscar.” “Reverend Jones! What are you doing here?” “This is my room,” the elderly man answered with a smile. “I thought I was supposed to meet with Mullah Farzin bin Saud,” Oscar said confused by the man’s answer. “He’ll be along any time now. People are used to Farzin, Israel, and me visiting each other at these religious conferences. Israel will be along a little later.” “So I get to talk to all three of you at once,” Oscar said. He had been expecting cloak and dagger, but this was rather surprising. “That’s right,” the elderly man said. He laughed at the expression on Oscar’s face. The young man looked like he had just bitten into a lemon. He picked up a packet and said, “Here are your credentials for the conference.” Oscar took the packet and opened it. After reading the affiliation on his name badge, he asked, “First Temple of John?” “Hey, it was the only thing I could think of. It’s a name that suggests lots of things, but says nothing.” “Oh,” Oscar said. He went through the packet and noticed that there was a registration for the First Temple of John with him listed as Voice of John. Waving the paper, he asked, “What’s this?” “I had to register you as a religious leader of a church in case you were ever caught talking to one of us. If anyone even suspects who you are, I guarantee you that you will be killed,” the Reverend said. Oscar studied the Reverend Jones with the eyes of a warrior. He could see that the elderly man had the same acceptance of the dangers associated with his calling as any warrior. This was a life or death game they were playing. The seriousness of the situation reminded him of the rattle he had heard across the hall when entering his room. He asked, “Who’s across the hall?” “They’re my bodyguards. I have three of them in the three rooms across the hall. They were not happy about the fact that my room had a door they couldn’t guard.” “I can imagine.” “Speaking of imagination, what did you think of the Apocrypha?” “Well, the short answer is that I found them interesting. I fear that the long answer will take more time than we have,” Oscar answered. He had read them keeping in mind the analogy of different people’s stories of John Carter. Shaking his head, he said, “I can see why some would not want to include those books in the Bible.” “Why?” “There are different reasons for each book,” Oscar answered. The Gospel of Mary would naturally be suppressed by individuals afraid of giving power to women. He added, “Of course, the Gnostic books really undermine the idea of a centralized authority.” The two men talked about the various books left out of the Bible for a half an hour. They went over each of the books and tried to identify why it would be left out of the Bible. The Gospel of Judas raised interesting questions about which one of the Apostles was the true traitor. If Judas was fulfilling a mission given him by Jesus, then one of the other Apostles betrayed Jesus in some other fashion. In that case, the New Testament didn’t identify the form of betrayal. Their discussion ended when there was a knock on the door. In order to keep the relationship between the men a secret, Oscar went into his room and the Reverend closed the door connecting the rooms. It was two minutes before the door opened and Oscar found himself facing Mullah Farzin bin Saud. The two men examined each other for a minute. Farzin took in the suit, the beard, and the long hair of Oscar. It was a very different presentation of the man he had seen on television more than a year ago. If he hadn’t known who he was meeting, he would not have recognized him. Farzin said, “So you are the Desert Ghost.” “I am,” Oscar replied. He examined the Mullah taking in the black robe, the black turban, and the white beard. He was dressed in a subdued manner that clearly identified him as a conservative Mullah. “I had expected someone a little taller,” the older man said with a hint of amusement in his voice. He had heard the stories from Iran and Afghanistan about the Desert Ghost. The stories told of a man who could appear from nowhere and fight like a hundred men before vanishing without a trace. They talked about him as though he were the perfect warrior. At the same time, he was described as a Magi. The Desert Ghost was feared and respected across the whole Islamic world. Oscar laughed at the reference to his diminutive stature and said, “I hear that quite often.” Nodding his head, the Mullah handed Oscar a small Koran. Oscar looked at it and saw that it was in Arabic. Noticing the raised eyebrow, Farzin said, “I understand that you can read Arabic.” “Yes,” Oscar said wondering what his previous instructors had told the man. “That is good. I know that I don’t have to tell you to treat the book with respect,” Farzin said. “Of course, I’ll treat it with respect. It contains the words of one of the Powers that Be,” Oscar said. He ran a hand over the cover enjoying the sensation of the rough texture beneath his fingertips. Satisfied with the answer, Farzin turned away and walked over to a chair. Sitting down, he gestured to another chair and said, “Have a seat. I had always expected that when I reached my current age that I would live in a nice home surrounded by my children and grandchildren. I would eat dates and sweet meats. I would drink coffee. I would study the Koran all day. Instead, I travel all over the world arguing for peace. I am too old to pass up a chance to have a seat.” Smiling at the reference to age, Oscar went over to the offered chair. He commented, “When we are young, we look forward to chances to stand and move. When we are old, we look forward to sitting and resting. I guess that middle age is when we want to sit down when we are standing and want to stand when we are sitting.” Reverend Leroy Jones said, “Or that we are satisfied when standing or sitting.” “Or when we are not satisfied with either,” Farzin commented with a wink. While sitting down, Oscar noticed a small stone on a gold chain that hung around the old man’s neck. He could feel the power coming from the stone. Curious of its origins, he asked, “Is that from the rock?” “Yes. It is a symbol of my service to Allah,” the old man answered even as his hand went up to rest on it. In his travels, it was the only thing that gave him the strength to continue. The old man shifted and said, “These hotels do not understand the meaning of the word comfort.” “You always say that,” the Reverend Leroy Jones replied with a smile. Farzin preferred to sit upon pillows placed on the floor feeling that sitting in a chair was much too formal. He gestured to a carafe of hot tea and asked, “May I interest you in some tea?” “Yes,” answered Farzin. He sighed and said, “The West doesn’t understand a good cup of coffee.” At the look of inquiry from the older man, Oscar said, “Tea would be fine.” After serving tea, the Reverend asked, “So how are the talks going?” “My words are falling on deaf ears. Too many Holy Men believe that the United States is the Great Satan under the control of Israel. They see this as a land of sin where women are not protected and God has no influence. Even to suggest that the Americans follow a different God with different rules is blasphemy since there is only one true God, Allah. They truly believe that America must be converted to Islam. It doesn’t matter to them if infidels die in the process. That is Allah’s will and not theirs.” “Then they are not holy men,” Oscar said. Farzin smiled at the answer and said, “They have the right bloodlines and have studied the Koran for their entire lives. They are highly educated men and their words reflect the teachings of Muhammad, the last true prophet of Allah. To suggest that they aren’t holy would get you killed in less polite company.” “Point taken,” Oscar said. The reference to bloodlines made him glance in the direction of the Reverend. He wondered what bloodline had to do with anything. He looked at the Koran in his hand and said, “I have much to learn about Islam.” “Yes, you do,” the older man agreed. He felt that the West dismissed the teachings of the Koran as immaterial to life. He sighed and said, “There are conferences like this one, four times a year. We will meet at them and discuss what you have learned. A student of mine will go visit your Druid College to help you in your studies. Listen to what he says, but do not challenge him. He is young and there is much that he has not learned.” “Okay,” Oscar replied doubtfully. He glanced over the Reverend Leroy Jones to see what his reaction to the suggested course of instruction was. “Do not look so disappointed. That is the way our students are taught. I teach the advanced students and they, in turn, teach the less advanced students. Less advanced students who are particularly good will meet with me on occasion.” Oscar frowned and thought about the Druid College. The attitude there was to have the best teachers early in the process. That allowed the students to get a firm foundation upon which they could build. He said, “It seems to me that you would want the best person possible to teach first principles since everything you learn follows from them.” “One starts with broad generalities and then you refine the ideas. The broad generalities can be taught by any reasonably advanced student. It is when you start refining the ideas that great skill is required to guide the inquiring mind,” the Mullah answered. “Two such different world views on how to teach the young,” Reverend Leroy Jones remarked. He gestured to Oscar and said, “I think you’ll find Oscar to be a very adept student. I’m sure that he’ll outpace your young man fairly quickly.” “I don’t think so.” The idea that a beginning student would be able to challenge an advanced student ran counter to his experience. “Don’t forget that Oscar is learning this as part of his service to the Gods and Goddesses of the Druids.” The comment did cause the Mullah to think about it. He smiled and said, “Read the Koran for the rest of this afternoon. We shall discuss what you’ve read when I have finished this afternoon’s sessions.” Oscar spent the afternoon reading the Koran. It was a book of 114 chapters that was normally divided into thirty parts. He was able to get through the first fifty chapters in the course of his single reading. Admittedly, it was a superficial reading. He knew that he would end up reading the document many times before he would truly understand it sufficiently to argue the essence of the book. The first thing that he noticed on reading it was that the Koran was organized in a very different manner than the Torah and the New Testament. There was no attempt to present information in a chronological order. The goal was to present as much of the message up front as possible. Chapters were organized primarily on length. The second thing that he noticed was an emphasis on duality, usually presented as a conflict between two opposing principles. There was a real attempt to segregate those who followed the words of the prophets without argument from those who challenged the words. Those in the second group were presented as the enemy of those in the first group. Things were cast into allowed and forbidden. Intolerance of the forbidden was central throughout the Koran since acceptance of the forbidden undermined true belief. Oscar thought about it while waiting for the Mullah Farzin bin Saud. He wondered if the intolerance of those who failed to accept Islam or the words of the Prophet would interfere with his education. He smiled at the thought of how the stone carried by the older man would react. Mullah Farzin bin Saud entered the room to find Oscar seated by his little hotel table reading the Koran. He asked, “So how much of it have you read?” “The first fifty chapters,” Oscar answered. Rather than attempt to finish it, he had been reading the first part over again. He had decided that it was better to have a deeper understanding of a little bit of the Koran rather than a shallow overview of the entire book. “So what is your impression of Islam?” “I don’t have one,” Oscar replied looking up at the gentleman. He replied, “I wasn’t studying Islam, I was studying the Koran.” “It is the same thing,” Farzin said studying Oscar with a wrinkled brow. “It is not,” Oscar said. Holding up the Koran, he said, “This is the basis for Islam, but Islam is more than what is contained in this one book. Islam is a world view that is shaped by what is written here.” Surprised, Farzin realized that this student was making distinctions that none of his previous students had considered after their first reading of the Koran. Sitting down, he asked, “What is your first impression of the Koran?” “The first thing I noticed was the arrangement of the books within it. From what I’ve read, the arrangement presented here focuses on the message of Mohammad rather than the mission of Mohammad. I think it would be a very different book if read in the chronological order in which the chapters were generated,” Oscar answered. He gestured to the place where he was reading it for the second time and added, “Of course, I’ll know that better once I’ve finished reading it all of the way through.” “You got all of that out of reading the first fifty chapters?” “Yes.” “Do you have any other observations?” “Time is treated in a very different manner than how I am used to dealing with it in other texts. Events that were well in the past were presented with the same immediacy as events that were current when the book was written. From how earlier events are presented, it is at times hard to say that they were earlier events.” “You got that from the first fifty chapters?” “Yes,” Oscar answered. “So outside of the order of the chapters and the treatment of time, did you have any other observations?” “Duality seems to be a common theme throughout the book,” Oscar answered. He flipped through the pages and said, “Night versus day, good versus evil, obedient versus rebellious, and believer versus non-believer are all examples of duality that I noticed in the second chapter. There is an attempt to define each side of the duality so that a person knows if they are compliant with the good.” “You got all of that out of your reading this afternoon?” “Yes,” Oscar answered. Shaking his head, he said, “It would not translate well into English.” “Yes, that is a problem,” Farzin agreed. “It is the nature of some men to give greater weight to some parts of a message over others,” Oscar said. “That may be true, but all parts of the message have the same value. That is why we must study the Koran to be good Muslims.” “Yet I can not help but feel that the majority of those who profess to be Muslims do not understand the underlying message of the Koran. They follow the proscriptions blindly rather than the reasoning behind them,” Oscar said drawing upon his experiences with the terrorists. “You criticize the Koran?” “No. I criticize some of those who claim to follow the Koran. You forget that I have experience with some of the more radical members of Islam,” Oscar answered. “I had not forgotten that,” the old man countered sharply. He studied Oscar and realized that his protégé was going to have a very difficult time working with Oscar. The Reverend had been quite correct that Oscar would be a challenging student. For the next two hours, Mullah Farzin bin Saud and Oscar discussed the second chapter of the Koran. They didn’t cover much of the chapter. For both men, it was a very different kind of learning experience. For Farzin, it was a great departure from how he usually taught the Koran to new students. Students didn’t normally approach the book considering the political, historical, linguistic, philosophical, and social perspectives simultaneously. Farzin found he faced a tremendous intellectual challenge from the very first sentence of the second chapter of the Koran. It started with the words, “This is the Book which contains no doubts.” Oscar had observed that there could be no scholarly debate over any element of the Koran since there was no room for ambiguity. A very surprised Farzin found that he was defending his role within the Islamic world. After their discussion, Mullah Farzin bin Saud, Reverend Leroy Jones, and Rabbi Israel Teitelbaum sat around the room talking. Oscar listened to the men discuss the trials and tribulations of attempting to bring peace to a world that didn’t want it. After listening to the hardships of living out of a suitcase, Oscar asked, “What bothers you the most?” “The lack of understanding that men have towards men who are different,” the Reverend Leroy Jones answered. It was not just a lack of understanding of the religious differences, but included racial, national, and societal differences. “The inability of men to forgive,” Rabbi Israel Teitelbaum answered as the other two men nodded their heads in agreement. The eye for an eye mentality was destroying all chance for peace. “Men deciding what is Allah’s will based on their own agenda,” Mullah Farzin bin Saud answered while shaking his head with sadness. The other two men nodded their heads in agreement. “It sounds to me that you are bothered by the world view that is centered on the self that most individuals have,” Oscar commented. “I didn’t say anything about selfishness,” Rabbi Israel Teitelbaum said. “Sure. The inability of men to forgive is that they fail to take into account the motivations of others. Without understanding what motivated someone to trespass, it is difficult to forgive them. The problem is that you can’t understand the motivations of another without putting yourself in their place,” Oscar said. “You’re a fine one to talk about forgiveness,” Mullah Farzin bin Saud said. He looked over at Oscar and said, “You pressed the terrorists pretty hard and without much mercy.” “My actions weren’t performed out of malice,” Oscar said. “What do you mean? You were killing men left and right.” “I was protecting others from their violence,” Oscar answered wondering if the Mullah would understand the difference. “Those you killed would say that they were protecting others from the aggression of the Americans.” Oscar sat back in his chair and was quiet for a minute as he considered his answer. Finally, he said, “There was a rather large fellow in my high school. Lots of smaller people used to think he was big, slow, and stupid. They used to tease him, bait him, and attack him physically. The name calling was particularly bad. A lot of my classmates thought it was fun to mock him. It was very ugly. “The guy would slowly get mad until one day he would lose his temper and hit back. Now, he was very big and when he hit back, the person he hit was totaled. It was never a real contest. As soon as he did react, my classmates would point at him and call him a bully. They would be outraged that he would dare hit someone else even though they might have hit him. Big, slow, and stupid men are supposed to accept the abuse that is sent in their direction. “He was basically a nice guy. He’d try to break up fights. Of course, when he did that both sides usually ended up blaming him for any injuries they suffered. He was almost always the one who walked away with the black eye. When he didn’t break up fights, everyone criticized him for doing nothing. “He also tried to help people who were engaging in self-destructive activities. He was always the one who took away the car keys when someone had too much to drink at a party. He would use his size to intimidate them into handing the keys over to him. One day, one of my classmates nearly killed himself in an accident and tried to blame the big fellow. He had taken away the car keys to keep the guy from driving, but the guy had a spare key hidden in the car. Everyone said that he should have known about the spare key. I always wondered how it could have been his fault that he didn’t know about the spare key.” “So what did you do about it?” “I was never really involved in the situations involving this fellow. I was too much of a klutz to call anyone names. However, I did watch as things evolved. The person that he hit usually didn’t deserve the full violence of his reaction, but they did deserve getting put in their place. Others were just as deserving of getting put in their place. As far as I could tell, the poor guy couldn’t do anything right.” “Your point?” Waving a hand in the air, Oscar answered, “Well, I think that the United States is viewed a lot like the fellow with whom I went to school. The rest of the world views it as big, slow, and stupid. Everyone feels free to attack the country. Then they are surprised and outraged when it reacts to some provocation. In a way, there is nothing that the United States can do that the world will accept.” “There are many who would say that the United States deserves all the criticism it receives. Some of the most vocal are Americans.” “That’s what a lot of the people at my school thought about the big fellow. I think the big fellow blamed himself for the malicious behavior of others, too,” Oscar said. The last time he had seen the guy he was busy beating up himself for the last confrontation in which he’d been involved. It had been rather painful to see the big guy reduced to tears because he’d broken the nose of a guy who had kicked him in the ass for no real reason other than the idea that it would be fun. “So what happened to him?” “I don’t know.”