Britslut�s
Slutty Stories
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� Copyright britslut 2008. No re-use allowed without permission.
[alex and bob, two youths, are sitting on the steps of the town square, watching the world, and specifically its females, go by.]
alex: Cor, look at the tits on that!
bob: Like bloody basketballs, they are.
alex: Wouldn�t mind a feel of them.
bob: Nah, probably sag down to her ankles when she takes her bra off.
alex: Yeah. That�s the trouble with older women.
bob: How the fuck do you know? Never even shagged a girl your own age.
alex: I�m working on it. Anyway, Mr Experience, you haven�t popped your cherry yet, have you?
bob: I�m saving myself for Sylvia.
alex: What, Sylvia in the lower sixth? You�ll be lucky. Get to the back of the queue.
bob: She�s a cracker though, isn�t she? Legs that go all the way up, tits to die for.
alex: Bit chubby round the waist.
bob: Those are love handles, mate. Something to hold on to while you�re giving her one. Can�t stand bony girls.
alex: What about that one? [points]
bob: Her? That�s Ed�s sister. She�s not bony, just slim. Knows how to strut her stuff, doesn�t she?
alex: Not half. Look at that arse. Like two ferrets fighting in a sack.
bob: Where�d you get that from?
alex: My uncle says it. Annoys my mum every time.
bob: Talking of ferrets, what about her? [points]
alex: That�s Dave�s mum. You have got a thing about older women, haven�t you?
bob: Yeah, but! She�s a MILF and no mistake.
alex: What�s a MILF?
bob: Mom I Like to Fuck. There�s websites full of �em. Hot women getting fucked by young blokes, like us.
alex: In your dreams! Anyway, they�ll be all wrinkly with saggy tits and things.
bob: She doesn�t look like she�s got saggy tits. Look, you can see her nipples sticking out! Wow, she must be feeling horny.
alex: Or cold. My mum�s nips stick out sometimes. I don�t think she�s horny.
bob: Wonder what her minge is like.
alex: You�re sick.
bob: I�d give her one, sick or not.
alex: Be like fucking your own mum.
[Silence. They are joined by chris]
chris: Hi.
alex & bob: Hi.
chris: Anything doing?
alex: We�re just looking. Bob�s got the hots for Dave�s mum, over there.
chris: Wow, Gina. Yeah, she�s a babe, isn�t she?
bob: See?
alex: How d�you know her name?
chris: I keep my ears open. She�s hot stuff, you�re right.
alex: God, you two. She must be 45 if she�s a day.
chris: So what�s wrong with that?
bob: Yeah, a shag�s a shag. Think of the years of experience in there. Done it all. She must have had loads of blokes.
chris: So they say.
alex: What?
chris: That�s the word. She�s up for it. Might try her myself.
bob: Who says?
chris: Oh, lots. Paul saw her snatch the other day. She was sitting on the grass, short skirt. He swears he saw everything.
alex: And? What was it like?
chris: He reckons she shaves. Couldn�t see any hair.
bob: Fucking hell.
chris: I was round there a while back, she was in the garden, in a bikini. Not a big one either. Got a fucking hot bod, I tell you. Gave me a right boner.
alex: Has anyone ... actually done it with her?
chris: I heard that Ed gave her one.
bob: What, Ed from Stretford Road?
chris: Mmm.
alex: What was it like?
chris: Dunno. Ask him yourself. Here he comes.
[They are joined by ed]
chris: We�re talking about Gina. They say you bonked her.
ed: Hi guys. Who, Gina, Dave�s mum?
bob: The same. She was here a minute ago, looking extremely sexy, for someone who Al thinks is ready for a bus pass.
ed: Yeah, she�s a hot little tart.
alex: So you did do it with her?
ed: Might have done.
bob: Are you going to tell us about it?
ed: Oh, it�s personal. I never tell.
bob: I don�t believe you did it.
alex: Yeah, prove it.
ed: How can I prove it? Ask her if you don�t believe me.
alex: Oh yeah, like I�m going to go up to her and say, Hi, Mrs, did Ed shag you? What was he like?
ed: She might tell you. She�s doesn�t make a secret of her sex life.
chris: What�s it worth? Free beer tonight?
ed: Hmm. OK. I popped round one Saturday afternoon, I knew Dave was out playing football. Gina was in, pleased to see me, well what woman wouldn�t be? I told her how attractive she looked, said she was a really sexy woman, put my arms round her and gave her a big snog. She didn�t even struggle. In fact she started rubbing my cock and unzipping me. Then she knelt down and gave me a blow-job - nearly blew it there and then. So we got naked and did it on the floor. She was quite wild, made more noise than anyone I know. We did it three times, she couldn�t get enough of me. Don�t blame her, mind.
alex: Wow! What�s her minge like?
bob: Yeah, is she shaved?
ed: Completely. Bare as a baby. You can see everything.
[alex and bob moan softly.]
chris: You going to do it again?
ed: Might do. Afterwards she gave me a kiss and said pop round any time.
bob: What a slag. Christ, here�s Dave. What do we say?
[dave joins them.]
dave: Hi guys.
alex, bob, chris and ed: Hi.
[A brief silence]
alex: Dave, your mum. Um. Does she shave her pussy?
dave: Yeah, why?
alex: You�ve seen it?
dave: Course I�ve seen it. She often goes around starkers.
alex: Christ, I�ve never seen my mum naked. Not sure I�d want to.
dave: She�s cool. Says she doesn�t believe in secrets.
bob: Hehe. No secrets at all?
dave: Don�t think so.
bob: So, she tell you about Ed?
dave: Oh, yeah. Sounds like you gave her a good one.
ed: You knew?
dave: Yeah, course I did. She told me all about it. A word of advice for next time: give her puss a good licking. She loves that. Likes to cum a lot.
chris: Christ, I�m getting a hard-on here.
alex: Me too. Don�t you ... I mean, with your mum walking around naked and telling you all about being shagged and all ... doesn�t it give you a boner?
dave: Yeah, every time!
bob: Fucking hell! Why don�t you tell her?
dave: She knows.
bob: She�s just winding you up! Don�t you ever, like, want to give her a good hard shag?
alex: She�s his mum!
bob: So? Don�t you?
ed: I don�t want to hear this.
dave: Course I do! Wouldn�t you?
chris: Ever done it?
[silence]
alex: Jesus, of course he hasn�t!
chris: Dave?
dave: My mum may have no secrets, but I do. And that�s one of �em.
last modified 29 October 2008