Britslut�s
Slutty Stories
Maths
� Copyright britslut 2006. No re-use allowed without permission.
I was at a garden party given by a work colleague, Paula. She�s quite a bit older than me, about 55, but very well preserved. I�m not admitting to anything over 40! Anyway, I got collared by a guy my age whom I didn�t recognise - I wondered afterwards if he had gatecrashed the party, or maybe he was the husband of a colleague.
�Hi, I�m Andy,� he said. He was handsome in a rogueish sort of way and had a lecherous twinkle in his eye, rightly so as I soon found out.
�Hi, I�m Gina,� I said.
�Would you like to fuck?�
To say I was gob-smacked would be an understatement. Even when I was young and pretty, no-one had ever said that to me. OK, I�m not exactly over the hill, but one expects rather more subtle approaches as one gets older. Apart from that, my husband was not a dozen feet away. I wondered whether to be offended but decided that, in fact, it was a sort of compliment.
�That�s a very direct chat-up line, isn�t it?� I said.
He shrugged. �It works, I�ve found. You haven�t answered my question.�
�Well it doesn�t work on me,� I said, becoming a little angry. �How dare you?�
�I dare. It saves time.�
�What do you mean?�
�Well, look at it this way. I could spend three or four hours chatting up a woman at this party, only to find that she won�t fuck. So I cut to the chase. It takes just a minute or so to ask. I can try all the women here in an hour. Sooner or later one of them will say yes.�
�How many say yes?� I was intrigued in spite of myself.
�One in fifty. Approximately.�
I couldn�t help but admire his cold-blooded mathematics.
�Well, good luck to you.�
He gave a mock bow and retired; I saw him approach a friend of mine and wondered what reception he would get. Thereafter I kept an eye on the chap as he circulated, leaving behind a trail of red-faced, fuming or chuckling women. Eventually he approached Paula and the conversation lasted a good deal longer than average. Then to my amazement they walked into the house together! I looked around and saw Paula�s husband busy at the barbeque. My insatiable nosiness got the better of me and I crept carefully indoors, trying to detect where they might have gone.
There was a faint noise from upstairs. I followed it, preparing an excuse of looking for the bathroom. A bedroom door was open a few inches. I peeped in and saw Paula with her back to me, and Andy kneeling in front of her. Paula was naked apart from a white thong! Her pale slim body glowed in the sunlight. As I watched, hypnotized, Andy slipped his fingers under the waist strap of her thong and eased it down her long legs. I saw her hands go to his head and grind her pubes against his face. Such a sexual act from a respectable married woman in her fifties made me gasp aloud.
Hot and bothered, I beat a retreat to the garden and spent the next half-hour watching for their return, my mind only half on my friends� conversations and half on thinking about what Paula and her stud might be doing. Eventually she emerged, looking cool and relaxed in her long white linen dress. Andy appeared after a few minutes, and I collared him.
�So it worked then.�
He grinned like a cat that had just eaten a tub of cream.�
�Yep. She�s hot stuff! I love older women.�
�Why�s that?�
�They usually aren�t getting enough sex and they know exactly what they like. And they�re grateful afterwards!�
�Was Paula grateful?�
�Is that her name? Yes, extremely. She�s going to show her gratitude again in due course. What a woman!�
�Better than average?�
�She�s surprisingly tight. And very good muscle control, front and back. She�ll have spunk running down her legs all afternoon.� He took his hand out of his pocket and showed me the white thong. �This is turning you on, isn�t it? �
It was, but I wasn�t going to admit it to him. �You�re a cad and a bounder. Why don�t you go chat up some more women? Try and improve your average.�
�OK, see ya.�
For the rest of the party I watched Paula playing the perfect hostess, thinking of her naked body under the thin dress, with spunk running down her legs. Did I wish I had said yes?
last modified 9 May 2006