3 comments/ 10979 views/ 2 favorites The Struggle Ch. 00 By: doberinca Characters: Rob - main character Helena - his wife Marion - widow; very much in love with Rob Cathy - friend (psychiatrist) Kim - friend (local doctor) Kate - sister of Helena Carmen - friend; member of the circle (women society) Bridget - friend; owner of a theater shop (- and more mature items) Michelle - friend Lisa - owner of a bridal shop Olga - friend; member of the circle Helga - friend of Olga Jenny - Rob's ex-wife Sylvia - member of Helena's security organization Nicky and Inca - Rob's Doberman dogs Reader, this story is the follow-up of 'a game within a game part 1-2-3'. Actually it's part 4, but the title didn't cover the contents anymore. (prologue) Breakfast. At the breakfast table Rob told Helena that Bridget had asked him to visit her store. She wanted to show him something that could be used in their new, soon to be built 'playroom'. "You can't come along Helena, she explicitly asked me to come alone. It seems she wants it to be a surprise to you and our friends and lovers, hence the request. While Marion assured me she can be trusted I am concerned, it seems every time a mistress asks something of me, a little voice inside is telling me, 'be careful'." He watched Helena's face to see her reaction while he told her about the invitation as he really didn't like the idea of going there alone and wanted her input. Bridget owned a shop with all kinds of theater clothes, but she also happened to be a Mistress who had previously told him that she would like to do a 'session' with him. Not that he was frightened per se, but he had found some dominant women could be very persuasive, or even demanding of him, in trying to get him to do things he didn't want to do. He needed Bridget as a supplier for some important 'play tools' (the other part of her business), she knew that of course, and he was afraid she would surely use that as leverage to get him to 'play' with her. "Given what has happened to you, Rob, I can understand your concerns." Marion had just joined them, when she entered the room she wore her long black peignoir with a short nightgown beneath, which flowed around her and showed vaguely her nipples. She kissed both Rob and Helena very tenderly. "However, Bridget is a good friend of mine, and she is naturally curious about a man who has gathered 4 women around him," Marion said in defending her friend. Rob said diffidently "I didn't gather 4 women, Helena did". "Oh no," Helena said sharply, "if you were not here, I'm absolutely certain Cathy would not be going to live with us. And I'm pretty sure that about Marion, too!" Marion answered warily. "I think you are right Helena, I love you, and I care for you, but if Rob hadn't come back (she was referring to the last blow up, when Rob had left Helena for almost 2 months), I would probably be living on my own again". "There, you see Rob?" Helena grinned, "You are just the heart-breaker. You are also the only man Kim would want to be around; but of course I don't count, I'm just your wife." Rob shook his head, and didn't answer. He knew when it was better to keep his mouth shut; the best thing for him in the future was not to argue with them. Four against one, he would always lose. "I'm going to take a walk," he announced, "I'll be back in an hour," kissed Marion and Helen, then headed for the living room and whistled to his dogs Nicky and Inca. He decided to make a long walk, the dogs were no longer puppies, though still very young, but they grow fast and they were able to make longer journeys. He wanted them to learn new commands, like 'halt' and 'attack'. The latter became more important, when they had visited an inn a few days ago, he had gotten insulted and harassed, and if Marion hadn't interfered, dressed in her domina outfit, he didn't know what would have happened. When he left, Helena said to Marion: "Bridget phoned me, Rob doesn't know, but I am to come also, but should use the back-entrance of the shop. Bridget can be trusted but for some reason I think she wants to fool Rob. She didn't give me many details, but she urged me to wear a sexy outfit". Marion smiled: "Yes, that is Bridget. So she does want to surprise Rob... Rob should listen to his little voices. She is really playing a dangerous game, you know how he can be. Does she really know what he is like..." Marion was lost in her thoughts for a few moments then spoke. "You know she is a Mistress, independent, unmarried, but popular amongst submissives. I have known her for a long time, I met her first with John (Marion's deceased husband) and he introduced me to her. She and I have done many sessions, in fact she was my tutor in BDSM and I actually liked it. I was green as grass when I met her and now I'm the one giving you lessons". "You never told me what you and John did," Helena said. "John was a real sub in contrast to Rob; Rob can be submissive, if he trusts you and if he is in the mood but it is only in play with him". Helena sighed and nodded her head. "Yes, I know. I don't know what Bridget is up to, but I will tell her to be very, very careful. Rob is short fused, so only if I am absolutely certain he can handle whatever she is thinking up will I tell her it is okay; otherwise I will tell Bridget the game is not going to happen..." "Don't let her drag you into something what can end in a tragedy," Marion warned her. "I absolutely won't let myself drag me into something, if I can't predict the consequences! But you were telling me about John." Marion continued on. "John was a doctor, and as such he had to deal with a lot of problems. Death, sickness, mental problems, all kinds of issues. However, when you can't leave your work behind you at the end of the day, when you take it all too personally and bring it home into your personal life, you have a big problem. I think that is why he eventually committed suicide," Marion saw Helena gesturing as if to say no. "Yes Helena, I have denied it for a long time, but Rob was right. I also believe he took his own life despite all I tried, I no longer blame myself." she stayed in silence for a few moments before continuing on. "John introduced me to the S&M world; I think he saw it as an escape, to leave the real world behind in submitting to me, his Mistress". Marion drank some more coffee, cleared her throat with emotion and continued her story. "Sometimes, when the weekend had started, he immediately referred to me as Mistress Marion while frankly I wasn't in the mood at all. I hadn't the heart to reject him as he had told me that he needed this to give his thoughts a rest. What I should have seen then is that an S&M game is an escape possibility, but not a cure for what ails someone. He should have visited a psychologist or psychiatrist from the start and not at the end, when the symptoms became worse. I'm still not certain whether his problems were related to a disease or from his work that he couldn't handle well....maybe both." Marion started to eat a sandwich and Helena poured them both another cup of coffee. "So the sessions you did with John were not personally satisfying?" Helena asked. Marion finished her sandwich and carried on with her explanation "No, absolutely not. I thought he needed it, and therefore I learned it, and I have to admit I liked it, sometimes. But I ultimately had in my mind that it was some kind of temporary cure for John, it was not a spontaneous expression of some deep need of mine". "I see. So the session we last did must be a relief to you, to finally not have the burden of trying to cure someone but rather simply enjoy it as a domme and partner." "Absolutely. I could cry out of gratitude. Rob finally surrendered to me, and I was able to give him pleasure and it was without compromises. It was not needed for a cure, it was just out of lust and love, and it felt a little like a love story to me, I cannot describe it, but it freed me. All those things I had done with John, sometimes very severe, was nothing compared to the feeling I got from the session with Rob - and maybe with you in the near future," and at the last words her eyes glanced at Helena mischievously. Helena blushed, she had undergone her first session with Cathy as a submissive, and she had enjoyed it very much, much more than she ever would admit, and she knew she couldn't fool Cathy and Marion any more. Cathy and Kim had left them just yesterday, Kim had to make her regular house-calls and Cathy would be seeing new patients today. Tomorrow Helena, Marion and Rob would move back into his house that had been refurbished and now had 3 completely newly decorated bedrooms. Helena thought about what they had discussed about what had been her house (and would be where all of them lived eventually) and finally put the things they wanted to change on paper as a reminder for the architect. Rob had almost everything figured out in terms of a wish list: 2 elevators, one from the new playroom to their bedrooms, one for the staff at the other side of the building, a complete rebuild of the bedrooms on the first floor that would include for each of them a new bathroom and bedroom, an office/computer room, a kitchenette and a sitting room. The bathroom of Rob and Helena would be the largest as they wanted to be able to shower with the 5 of them together, and the same for their bedroom, it was laid out to have enough room for 2 large beds. For himself Rob had designed an especially large walk-in closet, for he had 2 wardrobes, his male wardrobe and a huge female wardrobe. The room behind the cellar would be made into a 'gym local', with a few smaller rooms as a 'study', a wardrobe and bathroom with a large built-in bath, to be able to do 'water sports' as Marion called it. Behind the 'gym local' another room would be built for the 'gym equipment'. They would of course discuss it with Cathy as well to see if based on her experience if she had something special in mind to add to their design. To keep her psychiatrist practice Cathy would also get three extra rooms downstairs in a wing of the estate that currently was out of use: she would have a waiting room, an examining room and a study there. Except for the elevators, everything else could be done in a reasonable amount of time. Helena and Rob were very rich, and they could afford to carry out a lot of work at the same time by employing a lot of contractors and their crews to do the work. Rob and Helena had made an appointment with the architect to discuss the latest details, the man would visit them tomorrow afternoon at the estate where they would make a final round through it and when he left, they would pack their belongings and leave. The staff would take care of the rest. Helena actually enjoyed living in Rob's house. She and Marion were very close and had become lovers while Rob of course had the attention of both women. His house (that was also her house of course) was situated in a nearby town and it would be a welcome change, after living so long on the estate. It meant they had to prepare their own dinners, do the grocery shopping and so on, just like normal people. Rob had recently bought the apartment below his house as well, so he had more space, but for the time being the apartment below was still divided from his original house. When the estate renovations were done, Rob's house would also get a renovation. The plan was to build a staircase to reach the upper floor, were the living room now was situated. "So tonight is the last night for a month or longer we spend here?" Marion asked. "Indeed, it is our last possibility to play, but I think Rob won't be in the mood, to be honest. I have no idea what Bridget is up to, but you can be assured it is S&M related," Helena sighed. "Nothing to do about it, she has prepared a little plan and I have to find out what it is as soon as possible". "I really hope we still can do a session, like last week. Not just for the sex and the intimacy, but for the feeling of us really being together, as lovers and soulmates. Helena, if anything is bothering you that has to do with me, please tell me immediately, I don't want to have secrets or mistrust between us," Marion stepped towards Helena and kissed her on her mouth, and Helena replied tenderly to that kiss and put her arms around Marion's shoulders and made her sit on her lap. She then opened Marion's peignoir and caressed her breasts. "You are so dear to me, we have to promise each other, whenever we feel uncomfortable about something, to say it immediately." Helena kissed Marion again. "I definitively want to do a session with you this evening, with or without Rob." "Yes, we will, I'm looking forward to that, I'm so glad everything is OK between us again," Marion answered. Marion stood up and took her seat again. Both women looked in love with each other and suddenly both blushed about their feelings and started to laugh. "We behave like teenagers," Marion said, grinning. She had the feeling she finally was 'home', being with both Helena and Rob. They finished their breakfast and both went upstairs, to take a shower and prepare themselves for this day. Helena hurried, she knew that when Rob came home, he soon would leave again for his appointment and she then had to follow him discreetly. Bridget's shop Helena hurried to get herself ready but it wasn't necessary as Rob took his time coming back home. Rob had found a quiet place in the nearby forest and there he had started to train his dogs. They were eager to learn, considered everything a game and became very enthusiastic with the 'attack' command especially. They understood clearly what he meant with 'attack', but to withdraw when he wanted them to stop was not so easy. But, he would train them each day from now on, not to make them aggressive, but rather that they needed to know what to do in an emergency like at that inn. Then he remembered his appointment with Bridget, he phoned her and asked what time he was expected. She told him that the shop was closed today, and that he could come right now. So he brought his dogs home, told Helena and Marion goodbye and soon was on his way to Bridget's place. Bridget's shop wasn't too far from where he lived and within 30 minutes he had arrived. Rob saw that there was no light burning, like the last time when he arrived with Marion, and walked to the front door and pushed the bell. Immediately a light went on and he saw Bridget approaching inside. She opened the door and said "Welcome Rob, I'm glad you could make it," and she gave him a kiss on his cheek. He kissed her back as she was always friendly to him. "Follow me Rob, I have something to show you." Bridget walked ahead of him. He now could take a good look at her and noted she was dressed in a black dress that reached down to her knees. He saw she also was wearing nylons and the inevitable black high heels. They reached the room with all the S&M stuff in it that she kept hidden from the public. At the back of that room she opened a door, that gave admittance to a larger room. Immediately Rob recognized the device that hung from the ceiling, it was the same kind of frame Cathy had in her attic. Now he knew where she had gotten it from originally. "This frame is identical to the one Cathy has," Rob remarked to Bridget. "That is correct Rob, I have someone who makes them for me and I sell it only to special customers, like yourself" Bridget declared. "This one has been made especially for you. I made inquiries about your size, so that when you are tied up by your Mistresses," Bridget watched him very circumspectly for his reaction, then she continued, "the cuffs are about 5 inches from the frame, so you can not touch it. There is a foothold here," she pointed to a place on the downside of the frame, "where you can stand on your feet. Furthermore the possibility to support the rest of your body has been made possible by the use of a leather harness, what can be tied around your chest. The fun thing about this frame is that it can be used to give you a feeling of floating in space, especially when you are blindfolded. I can change the angle forwards or backwards, and you can be moved through the room as well." A rail was fastened to the ceiling and the pulley was fastened to a glider, so the whole construction could be moved. "It's also handy if you want this out of sight; just bring the frame behind a curtain like that," and she pointed to the curtain in the back of the room. Rob liked what he saw, it would create possibilities to hang someone horizontally or even upside down. "And you want me to try it I reckon?" Rob asked though he already knew the answer. "I think you have tested it yourself?" He continued. "Yes and yes," Bridget answered. "The builder of this frame and I have both been tied up to it and we liked it. If you don't tell the others how this works the first one who is tied up to it will get a pretty unexpected experience." Bridget pointed at the pulleys: "I handle all by hand, but you can - and I advise that - use electric pulleys and also for the rail system as well." Rob looked around and saw that the rail went to the back of the room, where the curtain was hanging. "What is behind that?" He asked suspiciously. "Just rubbish from the man who built all this, I didn't want to spoil the view, so I covered it all. You see, I wanted to do this with you in style." She awaited his reaction, but Rob just stared at her. Finally she asked, "Do you want to do a soft S&M session with me, Rob? I have asked you before as you always have intrigued me. You are not a normal sub, a lot of people would give me a lot of money to do a session with me, but it is I who am asking you" "I am reluctant, I don't really know you, the only thing I know is that you have trained Marion, so you are much longer in this scene then her, more experienced and probably more capable of hurting me in a subtle manner. I don't know... I should have brought Inca and Nicky with me." Confused, Bridget asked "Who are Nicky and Inca?" "They are my Doberman friends and they are trained. " Rob added the last word with an ominous tone. "I once had Cathy untie me by just threatening her with them." Bridget looked scared and blurted out, "You didn't..did you?" Rob looked at her with a dark look "You don't know me," he warned her. "Had you heard about Iris?" "Yes, someone gave her a beating, and she disappeared out of the scene." Suddenly Bridget seemed to realize something. She took a step back from Rob, and said accusingly, "It was you who did it to her, didn't you?" "That happens with people who mistreat me," he said coolly, "I make them regret it, sooner or later." "I don't think I want to do a session with you!" Bridget suddenly was frightened. "If you behave and do normal things, you are OK, but as soon you use things on me like needles, or give me heavy bruises, I will retaliate, have no doubt about that. I'm not like others, who will do everything for their Mistresses without question. I can go to a certain point and I will not allow Mistresses to stretch my limits all that far, if it all. I want that to be perfectly clear." Bridget looked at him a bit astonished. "Where on earth did you get that nonsense from? A good Mistress will never do things what is not discussed before." "I agree with you: 'A good Mistress'. But there are some who kidnap you and beat you to prove they are 'superior'; I am referring to Iris. I was so mad at her, that after her torment when I regained my strength again; I showed her hell!" Bridget sighed. "OK, you made your point. Let's keep our relationship professional. I'm a saleswoman and maybe you will buy this device after you have tried it." "Correct," Rob answered. The Struggle Ch. 01 Author's Note: This is the fourth story in the chain "A game within a game." Characters: Rob - main character Helena - his wife Marion - widow; very much in love with Rob Cathy - friend (psychiatrist) Kim - friend (local doctor) Kate - sister of Helena Carmen - friend; member of the circle (women society) Bridget - friend; owner of a theater shop (- and more mature items) Michelle - friend Lisa - owner of a bridal shop Olga - friend; member of the circle Helga - friend of Olga Jenny - Rob's ex-wife Sylvia - member of Helena's security organization Nicky and Inca - Rob's Doberman dogs Reader, this story is the follow-up of 'a game within a game part 1-2-3'. Actually it's part 4, but the title didn't cover the contents anymore. * At the estate When Rob arrived at the estate, he headed straight to the living room, where his beloved buddies were sleeping. "Come on girls, let's go out and play some more," and Nicky and Inca followed him outside. He wasn't hiding their training anymore, he made a dummy of old clothes and wood, and repeatedly let them attack. At the beginning Inca and Nicky were careful and didn't bite, but when Rob encouraged them, they soon attacked the clothed wooden figure. Rob noticed several faces behind the windows of the staff, and he also thought that he saw Marion secretly looking. 'Good' he thought, 'even better, everyone soon would know what his dogs were capable off.' Then he heard Helena approaching, she was taking large steps over the pebbles of the garden path. She looked very angry; her skirt flowed and revealed her lovely legs but she wasn't here to seduce him. "Why did you leave us like that? Wasn't it fun? We carefully planned a surprise and you didn't act very mature. It was a pretty innocent joke - and yes - you were the 'victim', but I wouldn't really call you a victim of anything. You really offended her and I insist that you apologize to Bridget!" Helena almost shouted this, she was that furious. Her nostrils flared, her mouth had a grim line and her eyes shot fire. "She was beautiful in this state," Rob thought. But then he thought about the morning 'surprise' and he felt his anger and also a bit shame rise within his chest. Again he had been tricked... Rob just looked at her with the cold look Helena had seen before and that she feared. "You had your fun at my benefit, I don't owe her anything. I'm sure you bought some rubbish from her and she made her profit, and you made her day!" The last word he spit out in anger. "Don't think I will be entertaining her ever again." Now he trembled with rage, he had planned to stay cool, but nevertheless his anger had risen again and he needed to get away from her, before he could say things he might regret. The last thing he wanted is to apologize to her and he thus kept the unspoken words in his mouth. He whistled to Nicky and Inca and quickly walked away from Helena without giving her another look and went around the estate house and went towards the front of it heading towards his car. He needed to be alone, he thought about going home, his home, but Helena and Marion would never let him go alone. He stepped inside the car and his dogs followed him, and drove off to the forest outside the village. Helena saw Rob leaving, full of anger, and she knew she had lost that battle. Bridget and she did fool him and she knew Rob well enough that in the end he would take revenge. Sometimes she wondered why she ever married him as his rudeness and anger were maddening at times. One moment he could be Prince Charming and the other moment he was blunt. Still, she loved him and she knew she couldn't leave him. In fact, some of the other women would jump on him the moment he was a free man. She shook her head and went inside the house. There she met Marion, who looked at her with inquiring eyes. "Don't say a thing." Then Helena explained, "Bridget made a fool out of him, or at least Rob feels so, and he left her without saying anything. She was very disturbed as nobody had treated her like that before. She was in her Mistress role of course, but still, Rob offended her deliberately and ignored her, and she knew it." "I had warned her, don't make a mistake with him, he is short fused and maybe she should be glad that she just was ignored," Marion said, defending Rob. "I know, but it was pretty innocent, I was involved, too, so I am also to blame." "Don't think he will forget, yes, you are also to blame, you are so stupid sometimes! I warned you, you know how he reacts," she shook her head, irritated. "And where is he now?" Marion asked. "He left in his car, taking the dogs with him. He told me he has taught them to attack and is planning to bring them along in the playroom any time we play. He must be really frustrated." Helena sighed. "Not frustrated, scared. What did you say to him to when he mentioned bringing his dogs with him?" "I won't allow that. I didn't even discuss it. I told him I enjoy being a Mistress for him and I also told him that I also would sub sometimes." Marion nodded. "I think I get it, he is scared as hell with having three Mistresses. I can understand him, I also would be scared. No 'vanilla' women in his surroundings, everything he does is observed by us, his potential dealers of punishment. I'm afraid we haven't heard the last of this, Helena! I'm pretty sure he will explode sooner or later. We had better inform Cathy of this." With a concerned look Helena watched Marion, while she made a phone call to Cathy and spoke about the things they had just discussed. When she finished her phone call, Marion said to Helena "She will be joining us this evening." They both looked worried, and Helena started to cry. Marion tried to comfort her, but she knew it was out of their hands now. If he decided to leave them again, she didn't want to think of that... Michelle. Rob parked his car at his usual place. Normally no other cars were present, but today someone else had the same thought as him. Looking in the other car he saw a blanket on the backseat, obviously a dog owner like himself. He let go Nicky and Inca and they ran towards a nearby creek, were they could drink. Rob knew that most dogs always would prefer rain water above the water from the tap. He heard them barking and wondered why they were making such a noise. Pushing through some dense low shrubbery and low trees he reached the embankment. He saw Nicky and Inca eagerly playing with another dog, also a Doberman he realized. He walked towards them and saw a woman sitting on a fallen tree, eating an apple. She smiled at him and said "Always nice to see that the race recognizes the sort. Every time when Boris meets other Dobermans he plays, while with other breeds he sits and waits." Rob saw the dogs were having a great time. They ran through the water, jumped on one another and were rolling on the muddy shore. He knew Helena would be pissed off when he brought the dirty dogs into the house. However, that shouldn't matter, he thought. At first wasn't sure whether to go to his old home after finishing with the dogs but now he was certain he would. If the dogs made things dirty there, he would clean it up; after all it was his house, his place where he really felt at home, no matter how cozy Helena's estate could be. He looked at the woman, and introduced himself "Hi, I'm Rob, I don't think we have met before," and gave her his hand. She laughed and said "How formal, normally I just say hi to somebody with a dog. My name is Michelle." "Please to meet you," Rob grinned and glanced at her. He didn't dare to take a long look at her, but at his first glance she looked a bit older than him. She had long blond hair and wore glasses. She was dressed in an old long coat, jeans and rubber boots. Obviously they were for taking long walks with her dog and didn't care about her clothing's appearance. "Do you fancy a walk?" Rob asked her, "I'm getting cold just sitting here." "Fine with me, the dogs can play while we walk," and they start to walk at a slow pace. When she stood Rob noticed how tall she was, even taller than himself. It looked like she had large breasts hidden under her shapeless coat. The dogs followed, they didn't need to be called, as Dobermans always circle around their master. He had somewhat relaxed in the company of this woman. "finally a normal woman," he thought, then he frowned, thinking of the contrast with the situation with the women in his life. "What is the matter? You looked so dark suddenly," Michelle asked. "Sorry, I had a bad morning today, and I was thinking some things over," Rob replied. "Maybe you can tell me, talking about bad things enlightens your soul," she smiled invitingly. Rob looked at her. "I don't know if you would understand what is troubling me." "Try me," she dared him. "You asked for it," Rob said with some anger in his voice. Michelle looked surprised and just said "Hey! Don't be mad at me. Just tell me, I'm a good listener." Rob started talking, about the events that morning, about how he was tricked, his anger and eventually, about his shame. While he had finished his tale, Michelle looked at him in disbelief and asked "So you fucked two women and you are unhappy about it?" "It's not the fucking, rather it's the game they played, for some reason they like to tease me and in this case, making a fool out of me," Rob answered. "This case, so it happened before? And you are living with a genuine Mistress?" "Three," Rob said, "three Mistresses, Helena, my wife, then there is Marion, very much in love with me, a widow, and there is Cathy, a psychiatrist, a bit lonely and has been asked by Helena to join us." "Not possible!" Michelle mumbled, "You are joking, aren't you? Three mistresses?" "There is even a fourth person, Kim, a normal family doctor, well, not really normal," Rob sighed. Michelle started to laugh. "Now you are making a fool out of me, I started to believe you, but with the fourth woman, you exaggerated." Rob didn't smile, he just kept staring at Michelle's face, and the laugh on her face died. "You mean it, don't you?" She whispered that softly, in shock. "I didn't lie to you," Rob answered. "You know what the worst part is? Helena is a beginning S&M Mistress, but Marion and Cathy are almost professionals and they want to build a new playroom, and guess who will be the victim?" Silently they walked further, each with their own thoughts. "But Rob, I don't see a problem with those Mistresses. You just have to say one thing to them." Rob asked, "And what is the one thing I have to say?" Michelle said "No." Rob looked with wondering eyes and said, "I don't understand, why won't you tell me?" "The word you must say is 'NO', NO you won't play along, and NO, if they decide not to fuck with you as some kind of punishment, then you just say NO to them too, about having sex. You just sleep in the guestroom and the hell with them." Amazed, Rob looked at her and said, "You are right, I don't have to get mad and I just don't play along anymore with their little games." "Indeed, don't apologize, don't explain, just say NO. It is the simplest solution. They can't expect that you be there for them every day and whenever they want. You love them, you want to go along with them and I can see that, but only up to a certain point," Michelle said resolutely. Rob face lightened up, he didn't have to make excuses anymore. But then he had made a promise to Marion. While she was the only one who he really trusted, she was in fact also the only one who had really hurt him. Again his face darkened while he thought about her and his promise to her. "You are not totally satisfied with my answer," Michelle said, "what else is bothering you?" They had arrived at a bench, normally Rob's turning point to go home again. Now he sat himself on the bench. "You have only heard a part of my history, do you have thirty minutes?" Michelle said "Sure," and sat beside him. Rob talked, and talked. He told her from the start, about Jenny, his meeting with Marion, Helena's part, Kim and Cathy and even Kate. All this time Michelle looked at him, very much surprised with his story and didn't make any comments. When Rob finished telling her about his 'adventures', she just shook her head and said, "An unbelievable story Rob, I can't help you with this one I am afraid. You just have to make up your mind - and if you can't handle it anymore, when the burden becomes too heavy, just leave." "I can't just leave them, impossible, I love them. But a day like today is sometimes too much. Thank you for listening to me." "Not a problem Rob, anytime. Shall we go back?" They decided to return and then to go home. They said goodbye at the parking lot, and Michelle even kissed him on his cheek and whispered, "Just a goodbye kiss," and Rob thanked her. "Maybe sometime we can get a cup of coffee somewhere, where our dogs are welcome?" "We'll see about that, Rob," and with a last wave of her hand, she closed the door of her car and drove away. Rob went home, to his old home, and when he drove into his old neighborhood, it felt like truly coming home again. He then bought some groceries and also some food for his dogs in a local store. When he reached his house and brought the heavy bags inside he started to feel relieved. He started making his dinner consisting of meat, potatoes and vegetables and in the meantime he fed his dogs, and by doing these normal domestic things his mind came to a place of peace. Cathy. At the mansion Helena, Marion and Cathy discussed the latest developments. Cathy was angry again."How many times do I have to tell you, don't fool around with him! He isn't in the mood for games and probably won't be for a long time. Helena, I thought you were smarter then that, the moment Bridget invited him, you should have interfered. And you are also to blame Marion. You also could have stopped him going there, or at least accompanied him, no matter what Bridget might say. You should have told Rob that Bridget can be trusted usually, but that she cannot be trusted while she is playing her little games. Damn it to hell, I'm pretty sure he has had a relapse. Maybe he had built up some trust, but count on it that it is near zero again." Helena started to cry and said sobbingly, "But it was pretty harmless!" "Yes, I know, normally it would be, but not with his background. If it was anyone else I would agree, but not with his history. We were just on our way back, the performance of Marion in the inn boosted his trust, but now..." Cathy shook her head in disbelief, about the stupidity of it all. "What now Cathy?" Marion asked. "It's obvious he won't be coming here tonight. We can all go to him, or I can go alone. It's up to you, Helena," Cathy replied. Helena still was sobbing and with ruined make-up she looked at Cathy and said, "Do what is needed to make him forgive us, say to him I dealt with the architect and he is coming tomorrow, so he has time think it over. If he doesn't want us at his place I will cancel the whole thing." "I can live with that," Cathy replied, "lucky for all of us I only have to work tomorrow afternoon, I somehow assumed this would be a late night, but this mess I could not predict. I will visit Bridget soon and tell her what I think of her as well." "Please don't Cathy. Don't make it worse, Rob has insulted her already, nobody had ever walked away from her while she was in her Mistress gear." "Good, that will teach her. I am not surprised; I expected this kind of behavior from her. OK, I'm off, I will phone you tonight. I don't suppose that he answered any phone calls from you?" Both Helena as Marion admitted that he didn't answer any of their attempts to make contact. "Wait for my call," Cathy said, hugged Helena and Marion, and said at last, "Cheer up, I will fix it. I will show him that you are not to blame," and she left. While she drove to Rob's, she wasn't so sure about the things she had said. What if Rob wouldn't let her in? Upon arrival at his place, some thirty minutes later, it was already dark. Rob had closed his curtains and a soft light shined through some holes. Cathy sighed, climbed the stairs to his front door and pushed the bell. She heard his dogs barking, even before she pushed the bell, they guarded him very well. The door opened and Rob stood in front of her with a defiant look on his face. "What do you want, Cathy?" He asked this in a not very friendly tone. "I came here to apologize for Helena and Marion, and to talk things out with you. I haven't done anything to upset you, so you could at least hear me out." Rob stepped aside reluctantly, and gave her admittance. When she entered the warm living room, Rob took her coat and hung it in the hall. "What do you want to drink?" He asked her, courteous as ever. "I would love an Irish coffee," Cathy answered, pleased with this opening. Rob immediately went to the point "So you are planning to stay the night with me?" "If you allow me to," Cathy said mischievously, "I didn't bring any clothing, but I'm sure you have something for me to wear." Rob looked at her suspiciously and then said "I think we have the same size, that won't be a problem. But why do you assume that you can stay here? I will have to think about that." "Come on dear; don't be so harsh on one of your lovers. We all know what you went through, and Helena simply had misjudged the situation." "No, you are wrong about that, she knew what Bridget wanted to do, and she liked the little joke. But again, why is everybody so determined to make a fool out of me? You know I'm absolutely not in the mood for jokes, not now. Helena knew! She should have known better, and then to even mock me about it!" Rob angered at the thought. He went to the kitchen to make the Irish coffee. He had good whiskey and luckily also some whipped cream. When he came back in the room, Cathy had made herself comfortable on the couch. She stretched out her legs, emphasizing the shoes she was wearing, and Rob could also see some white lace from her slip. Her tight skirt was riding up a bit and he suspected she had done it on purpose. She of all women knew how he liked seeing a bit of lingerie. She was playing mind games with him he realized. Cathy started speaking again. She had clearly seen the mixed emotions on his face. "Rob, please try to forget the whole thing, Helena has given you so much, step over it, and forgive her. Be honest, be glad we still can laugh about things, and don't take it all too seriously. I don't take it very seriously in any case. Now, bring us the Irish coffee," and she gave Rob her most innocent smile. What Rob didn't know was that she wasn't so very sure of herself. She knew only too well that what had seemed almost harmless to Helena and Marion could have a large impact on Rob. She was a too good a psychiatrist to wave it away, on the contrary. With the distraction of her lace slip, she tried to change his mood to lighten things up. Rob couldn't resist her little tricks and in the end they were having their coffee and talked as if nothing had happened. "Rob, one thing, I promised Helena to let her know, I don't like it if she will go to bed feeling terrible." "OK, let them come, I'll make extra coffee and tell them to bring clothing and so on. We probably have to go back another time - ah - I almost forgot, the architect is coming tomorrow." "That is for tomorrow," and Cathy phoned Helena. Soon Marion and Helena joined them and Rob could see that Helena had been crying. Her eyes were reddish and Marion seemed a bit depressed. Marion came to him while he was in the kitchen, preparing their drinks and told him "Count to ten next time, you have given us a terrible day once again," and kissed him on his cheek. The Struggle Ch. 01 Rob turned towards her and said, "I had a lousy day too; you both know I am still very sensitive about certain things and making a fool out of me is not helping things." They joined Helena and Cathy who were softly talking and both looked at him when he gave them their drinks. "Please kiss me," Helena whispered. Rob went, sitting next to her on the couch, Cathy had made some room by sitting in an easy chair, and Rob took Helena in his arms. "Don't make a fool out of me anymore, certainly not with a stranger," and kissed her. Marion then sat herself on his other side and Cathy said, "Don't I deserve a kiss also?" Rob stood up, then gave her a long kiss, then Marion and finally Helena and said, "This evening I'm going to get drunk, sorry ladies, but I'm not in the mood for fucking," but from the reactions he got he knew they didn't mind; there would be plenty of other occasions. Of course Rob didn't get drunk, he just said that as an excuse, so they knew that he wouldn't be available. Still a form of punishment for them, he thought by himself, regarding the words from Michelle. When they went to bed, Marion and Helena were the first to go, Cathy and Rob were still talking and both had a glass of whiskey. "You had something to wear for me, you said earlier," Cathy said, when Marion and Helena left them she had taken the opportunity to sit next to Rob and he caressed her thighs and felt her breasts. "Mmm, I thought you didn't want to fuck?" "First I have to walk Nicky and Inca, their last round," Rob answered, not replying to Cathy's question. Cathy decided to go along for an evening walk and then go to bed as well. Rob fetched Inca and Cathy took Nicky on the leash. While walking in the cold night air, Rob sobered and grabbed Cathy's hand. They felt very close, walking like this and they were regretful when they had to turn to go home. Upon entering the warm and cozy living room Cathy asked "So, you don't want make love to me?" "No, I just said I would be getting drunk," and he kissed her on the mouth. She furiously answered his kiss and put her tongue into his mouth. Rob unbuttoned her shirt and then she stood up and stepped out of her skirt. She was beautiful in her narrow white lace slip and she knew it. Slowly she let her slip fell from her shoulders and it glided into a twirling satin and lace pile. She dropped her panties and Rob unfastened her bra. He stripped also and together they now were naked on the couch. "Let me blow you," Cathy whispered and she licked with her tongue along his shaft, and by doing so Rob's body trembled from lust. She then took his member in her mouth. He caressed her hair and then his hands enclosed her breasts. He pinched her nipples, which made her make little sounds, while she still sucked him. Then he removed his prick from her mouth, raised her head and kissed her again. With horny eyes she grabbed his member and she moved and brought herself down on his lap, while bringing his dick into her moist pussy. The moment he was inside her, feeling her warm, wet and narrow lovehole, he lifted her and slowly thrust his hips up and down. In a slow cadence they moved their bodies, holding each other tight and looking in each other's eyes. Rob kissed her and she eagerly responded by bringing in her tongue into his mouth, where their tongues met and began a twirling dance. All this time Cathy rose up and down, until the moment Rob's dick was almost out and then back, his balls almost touching her cunt. Up and down - and with each thrust he felt her warm, tight pussy, and it wouldn't be long before he would erupt. So he pushed her off him, he wanted to delay his coming. Cathy sat on hands and knees on the carpet and he took her from behind, doggy-style. With long thrusts he fucked her, cupping her breasts and Cathy could only moan and started panting. Rob felt her orgasm and he felt the heat in his balls and then his semen came out with a huge explosive spurt. He squirted his sperm load after load into her, until he had nothing left. Breathing heavily they both felt relieved, everything was OK between them. Rob made himself comfortable on the couch and Cathy laid herself above him, her legs between his legs and her head resting on Rob's chest, while his arms softly were caressing her back and hair. Silent they were resting there, enjoying each other's warm body. "Shall we go upstairs?" Cathy finally asked. "Yes, before we get too cold," Rob replied, and they went to an unoccupied bedroom. He stepped into the room were Marion and Helena were sleeping, and fetched a nightgown for him and Cathy. As he returned, she was already lying in bed. "Do you want to shower first?" he asked. "With you, always," Cathy replied impishly and they took a hot shower together. He brought her again to an orgasm, while eating her pussy, and then they finally went to bed. Cathy curled against Rob's body with her body and she breathed softly and very soon fell asleep, while Rob was still awake for some time, thinking about the strange day. Finally he also fell asleep. The next morning they were having breakfast together. As usual Rob was the earliest out of bed since he had to walk his dogs. He liked it when it was still early, the only people he saw were those who had to go to their jobs or other dog-owners. He didn't wake up Cathy, she still was fast asleep. He had looked in at Marion and Helena, they were also still in a deep sleep and Helena had one arm around Marion. He went out and started to walk. The cool air cleared his head and when he finished his round with the dogs he went home again. When entering his house he saw Helena being busy with setting the table. It was lucky that he had bought enough bread and eggs the other day. They kissed each other and it was all OK between them again. Marion and Cathy then showed up and sat at the breakfast table. Cathy smiled very much in love with him and Marion and Helena noticed immediately and protested. "I knew it, you have been fucking! Clever girl, you managed to persuade him?" Helena asked. "Yes, we women have our little tricks," Cathy said and she winked at Rob. "One woman I can handle, but three are too much for an old man," he declared. "Pff, old man," Marion sneered, "when you have fucked and you don't drink, you manage to have a hard-on within ten minutes." "Yes, but a third time takes a while, and I must be rested. Have pity with me, Mistress," Rob answered elusively. "Now I'm your Mistress? Only when it suits you," Marion said accusatorily - yet with a broad smile. "I have to go, within a few hours I have my first patients and I have to prepare myself," Cathy kissed them all goodbye and said "I'll be back before dinner," and left. "Helena, can you speak with the architect, I think all is clear and you have to get your and Marion's clothes anyway," Rob asked. "Of course, it's just a formality. I'm only interested how much time it will take to get all the things done." "And you will join Helena, Marion?" Rob asked. "Bring your dominatrix gear with you, we have an attic, just maybe," but he didn't get the chance to finish his sentence. Marion jumped up and with big steps she headed towards Rob and kissed him. "So you did mean it when you just said Mistress to me?" "Yes, you know I always have a weak spot for you." "Do you hear that Helena? He can be such an ass, and then he manages every time to surprise us. Thank you Rob, but don't forget Helena." "You can bring your Mistress outfit also," Rob took Helena's hand and kissed it, "if you really want to play Mistress with me, it is acceptable. But, and that counts for the both of you, don't push me, just light S&M, and no stretching limits and that nonsense, it is not my piece of cake." Both Helena and Marion looked at him, amazed that he finally accepted their dominance of him. "I'm not finished. We have no playroom here, so gaming will take place everywhere here I suppose. But, only when we all agree to play will I go along. So no more silly games or unexpected happenings and no surprises; and if I don't feel like it, I don't want to be called killjoy." "What happened Rob? Why are you changing your mind?" Helena asked. "The last time with Marion was extremely good, if that is S&M I like it, but I don't like too much pain, so I am making boundaries and I want you both to keep your promises. I give you both my final warning, if you go too far, I will kick you all out including Cathy. This is not an idle treat. I can accept an accident, but not pushing my limits. Whenever you want to try something new, you have to ask me first, we will try and then decide whether it can be on the S&M menu. Do I make myself clear?" "Of course Rob, Marion and I have learned our lesson. No more surprises, never. You can count on us, I don't want to lose you," Helena said softly. "Neither will I, don't you dare to leave Helena, because it would feel you were leaving me and I can't handle that shock. Then I will get into a depression again and I don't know what I will do. You have a responsibility towards us." "This is mental extortion Marion," Rob said perplexed. Marion took his face in her hands and kissed him. "So never leave us, dear man of ours. Just get over our little escapades, you are no saint yourself, either, and we will have a good life together," and she asked Helena, "Don't you agree?" "Yes, we all love you very much, why do you treat us so harshly? We are entitled to make mistakes, and have a quarrel now and then, but that is no reason to even think about a divorce or leaving us. Rob, I have found you and I won't let you go," and like Marion she approached Rob and kissed him. He stood between them and looked to Marion and then to Helena and he knew: they were his family. All thoughts of anger disappeared and he felt guilty about speaking out with such harsh words. "I'm sorry, in your company I feel safe. There was no need to make that threat. I'll give you both another trust point," and they all laughed now that the tension was broken. Soon Helena and Marion were leaving to go to the mansion for the meeting with the architect and to bring clothes for the coming weeks. His house would be a bit crowded, but lucky for him he had his dogs so he could retreat now and then. Rob went out in the afternoon and headed to the local stores. He had to buy some more groceries since he wasn't alone anymore. When he came home, he thus stuffed his refrigerator. He started making preparations for their dinner, Cathy had promised to join them and to stay for the weekend and he expected Marion and Helena back within the hour. When he was ready, he poured himself a glass of whiskey and started up his computer and read his mail and so on. Soon he heard the key in the lock, Nicky and Inca stormed to the door to greet Helena and Marion and then they came in, carrying their belongings and other stuff for the weekend. Helena had a cold face and shivered, while she kissed Rob and said "It's really cozy here Rob. To be honest I prefer your house more than the estate," and sat on his lap and put her arms around his neck. "I'm glad that I'm home," and kissed him again. Marion took a chair and sat next to Rob and said, "Don't I get a kiss too?" and offered her mouth. Smiling at Helena, Rob bent over, holding Helena and kissed Marion tenderly. "We are almost normal people, living like this," Helena remarked. "I agree, let's just live as normal people do, it will keep us healthy and happy. I have all I want, two loving wives, two girlfriends and those two," pointing at Nicky and Inca. "You are not really my wife Marion, but it almost feels like you are my second wife, you don't mind Helena, do you?" "Of course not, Marion is also my lover and I'm glad we have such a good 'marriage'. So if we seem kinky to the outside world, I don't care." "I hope Cathy will soon be here, then I can start to cook. Do we have any plans for the weekend?" Rob asked. "I hoped to do a lot of kinky stuff," Helena said mischievously. "Like what?" "Let's go to the mall and we'll all buy some new clothes, the kinkier, the better. What do you think Marion?" "Ha! Don't ask me, you know I love that. Shall we notify Kim to join us as well tomorrow? Wouldn't it be fun again Rob, you and four women, and we will buy you new lingerie, be assured of that. And I promise that I will tell the saleswoman that it is for you - if I think she can handle that information. So I tell you now that I'm going to tease you. You can stay at home of course, and then you'll have no idea what we will buy, so if I were you, I would come along." Rob blushed and said "That kind of game I enjoy, I know a lot of women buy lingerie for their husbands. I also want to take a long walk with my two lady friends, is that OK with you?" "If the weather is good, I'll come along," Helena replied. "So will I," Marion said, "By the way, I think I hear Cathy," and the dogs jumped up and waved their tails, anticipating someone known to enter. But it wasn't Cathy, it was Kim, Rob saw her car in front of the house. The bell rang, and Rob opened the door, upon entering Kim embraced and kissed him and then joined the others. They greeted and exchanged kisses, now the waiting was for Cathy. Rob handed Kim a whiskey, they were almost complete. Helena told Kim about their plans tomorrow, and she immediately was enthusiastic. "And tonight?" Kim asked. "Tonight we rape Rob," Marion joked and watched his reaction. "Pff, you do as you like, but when I am out of jizm, you will have to play with each other." He saw Helena and Marion speak softly, he knew they were up to something, he would soon find out. Kim stood up, and sat next to him, looked him in the eyes and asked "Did you miss me?" "Kim, you know I missed you, but you left us for your work. You can also come each night to my house and join us. We have prepared beds especially for you and Cathy." She took his hand and kissed it. "But tonight, are you going to fuck me? Say yes!" she said commandingly. "You know I have a limited amount of energy, but I think yes," as he kissed her. "I think Marion and Helena will do something dirty, they are talking softly and don't want me to hear. Maybe you should ask to be involved in their little plan."The door bell rang again and Helena opened the door for Cathy. Rob greeted her and excused himself, "I'll go fix us dinner." Rob went to the kitchen and Helena suddenly was standing next to him. "Rob, be nice to all of us, you wanted to do some kinky games, or Marion wanted that, but I didn't hear you protest in any event, so behave if something is happening that you don't like 100%. Do you promise?" "I promise that I will immediately protest if something should happen that I don't like, I have no idea what you are up to, but I promise that I'll safe-word immediately." "It isn't an S&M game!" "No, but you know what I mean when I say 'black'," Rob said. "Hmm, I don't agree, no safeword is needed. You want kinky, don't spoil it," she said with her most alluring smile. Rob laughed when he saw her like that. "You know I'll fall for that smile," he kissed her and she opened her mouth to let their tongues play. Rob felt his dick grow, so did Helena, and she grabbed it and started to squeeze."Stop Helena," Rob warned, "I have to fulfill at least one promise." "Yeah, you have to fuck Kim, I know, she was probably thinking the whole week about you. I must be mad to allow that! I also want you this evening and probably Marion, too, so prepare for a long night," she promised him, now with a mischievous smile. Helena left him and Rob waited in the kitchen until everything was ready to be served. He heard the women laugh; clearly they were having a good time. He called Nicky and Inca and gave them their food. While they were eating he stroked them. They looked up at him and pressed their heads into his hands. Then they continued to eat. They sensed his mood, for some reason he had a bad feeling. What was happening? He could still hear the women laugh. He brought in the plates and the rest. The coasters were already placed he noticed and then he brought in the dinner and put it on the table. Cathy, Marion, Kim and Helena then sat at the table and they all filled their plates. They talked to each other and Rob felt ignored. Not once during dinner was he spoken to. He decided to keep a low profile; it was of course on purpose but now he wouldn't give them the pleasure to see him get angry . "Again," he sighed, "not again..." When they all finished their meal, Rob cleared the table, without the help of any of them. That really pissed him off. He brought everything back to the kitchen and started the washing-up, again on his own. He then made coffee and when it was ready he took a tray and offered them all a cup of coffee. They thanked him, but gave no further attention to him. He quickly finished his coffee, took Nicky and Inca on the leash and disappeared. It was almost 21:00 now, the streets were almost deserted, and it was cold, rainy and dark. He didn't like these dark Months, the only good thing about November and December were the clothing shops, which had the clothes for sale he liked most: formal dresses, nice lingerie and a lot of other clothes which appealed to him. He decided to walk to the centre of the small town he lived in and do some window-shopping. He would be somewhat protected against the drizzle, the dogs already did what they had to do. He noticed a small figure walking behind him. He suddenly turned and the woman, he could clearly see it was indeed a woman, didn't have the chance to turn. She wanted to pass him, obviously he had surprised her. He spoke at her "You are here to guard me?" With a faint smile she said "I was hoping you wouldn't have noticed." "You know who I am," then Rob and she shook hands. She was his height, yet she gave him a very tiny hand, but her handshake was firm. Rob thought she must be a trained fighter. "It's cold; would you like to drink a cup of coffee with me? I just had one, but I want another one," he asked her. "BTW, what is your name?" Rob asked and she replied "Sylvia, and yes, I would like to have some coffee." Together they walked to a nearby pub and Rob ordered two coffees at the bar. Silently for a few moments he observed her - she was a dark-haired younger woman, he estimated her around 35, she was dressed discreetly in black jeans and a dark-blue sweater, her wet black coat she had hung on the chair next to her and clearly she enjoyed the warmth of this room. She had her hands placed around the warm cup. Rob couldn't resist, he had warm hands and he enclosed her hands with his hands. "You are so cold," he smiled at her, "I presume you don't like it when I take a walk with my dogs in this weather. Dog owners don't like it either, but it is something we do, in bad weather and in good weather. Usually I like it, but when it's wet and windy, like now, it's tough. But you get used to it." She didn't pull back her hands, she wasn't shy. She looked at him with dark brown eyes; some drops of rain still on her face and said, "It's all part of the job. Normally I don't mind, but like you say, sometimes it's tough." "When does your shift end?" Rob asked. "At 23:00, Neil will take over." "Neil is the guy I sometimes see in the car parked at the other side of the street? I see. Btw, can I have your phone number?" Sylvia was reluctant to give it up. Quickly Rob said "I won't make indecent proposals, I just need someone who I can phone in case of an emergency, that's all." "You can always call our office," she replied. "Yes, I can, but I prefer people I know a little bit, you or Neil, it doesn't matter." She gave him her telephone number and Rob thanked her. "I won't call you if it isn't absolutely necessary; believe me, I already have enough women around me." Sylvia smiled suddenly and then started to laugh aloud. Rob joined her, and soon they were talking as if they had known each other for years. The Struggle Ch. 01 He found out that she was divorced, no children and always had been training at sports schools. For example, She had the black-belt in jiu jitsu. After fifteen minutes or so of chatting they said goodbye and Sylvia gave him a quick kiss on his cheek and Rob hurried home while she followed him at a discrete distance. Upon arrival in the street he lived on, she opened the door of a parked car, and started the engine. She waved to him as she drove by. When Rob entered his home, cold and wet, he heard the women giggling, they were upstairs and he decided to take a look. They were all in the enlarged bathroom and were sharing a shower. Rob was still cold from his walk and decided to join them. When he stepped into the bathroom with the enlarged bathtub they looked at him smiling, and one after another they left the bathroom, so he was all alone standing under the hot shower. He felt a strange reaction in his belly, it was the kind of pain you can feel sometimes when you are in distress or when you know that something bad is coming your way. He rubbed himself dry and shaved himself as he didn't want to hurt them with his beard. When he went into the large bedroom he saw Helena and Marion entangled kissing each other but they took no notice of him. He said "Black" but they didn't respond. When he stepped into the bedroom where Cathy and Kim were kissing and fumbling, he received the same response, again they were too busy to see him. Again he said "Black" and he felt stupid for saying it and having it not obeyed once again. He was totally ignored, they didn't react to his safe-word so he decided to put on his clothes and go downstairs. His dogs immediately joined him and he allowed them to sit on the couch, next to him. When it was 23:00, he went upstairs again. They all were asleep now, Marion in the arms of Helena, and Kim with Cathy. Suddenly a flash went through his mind: they wanted to rape him, but it was not a physical rape, they wanted to rape him mentally by denying him sex. His blood pressure went sky-high, never in his life he felt more humiliated as he did now, to be treated like this in his own house. They treated him like dirt, that's what the laughter was about, they had planned this, and that's why they so quickly disappeared from the bathroom when he entered. They wanted him to give no time to join them. He fetched the cane he had used on Iris and put it on the landing and then he set foot in the main bedroom. Rob stood silently for a moment in the bedroom, watching Helena and Marion with a grim look on his face and then whistled to his dogs. They ran up the stairs and were standing beside him when the women opened their eyes, thus being roughly awakened from their first sleep. A bit amazed they looked at Rob and were suddenly scared, the look on his face didn't promise much good was to follow. With heavy steps he walked to Kim and Cathy and growled "Wake up and follow me." Marion and Helena already stood on the landing and soon Kim and Cathy joined them. "I've had enough of this. You are all to leave this house right now and take your belongings with you. It's now 23:30, if you want to return to me I expect you next week at the same time. You, Helena, I will give six blows with this cane and all others get five. If you don't appear Helena, consider yourself divorced. For the other ladies, Rob spat the words out, "If Helena doesn't appear, don't bother to come. You can only return if Helena returns. The caning I will give you won't be out of love, it will be harsh and I promise you, you will have trouble walking the next day. If any of you three don't show up, you are out of my life, forever." He turned to Helena "As I said, if you don't show up, you are out of my life, definitively. I also will turn the tables on you from now on. You will not treat me as a household slave and I will set new rules if you decide to come back. And now, all of you get out. You have twenty minutes to pack your stuff and leave. After 24:00 I will throw you all out, dressed or not." "One moment, Rob. It's my fault," Cathy explained. "We had such a good time yesterday, I wanted to do a little test. I thought you could handle this. We were teasing you a bit. I told Helena and Marion to be together, and Kim and I would do the same. So there was no 'room' for you. Instead of getting angry, you just could have participated in what we were doing. That would have been a mature reaction. I think you still have to learn a lot. You do need a lot of guidance, probably not by me." "Rob dear, it was a joke, we wanted to make you horny for tomorrow," Helena pleaded. "Nineteen minutes," Rob answered -- he wasn't bothered by what Cathy had said, that stupid bitch. If she wanted to test him, he would test her now, by throwing her out! "Rob please, you can't do this," Marion said, suddenly very much afraid and realizing this was no longer a joke. "Eighteen minutes," Rob just said. "If Helena is not coming back, I can't come anymore? You know what I have said!" Marion now was in tears. "Seventeen minutes. Don't hide behind Helena, you could have refused. I really don't care anymore, to be honest, I have again been deeply offended, not physically but in my self-esteem. And now outside with you all, take your clothes and leave. Bugger off! Sixteen more minutes." Without saying a word the women start to pack their belongings. Rob made a phone-call to Helena's security organization and told them there was an emergency and he wanted to deny the women access going forward, until he changed his orders. Within two minutes the door-bell rang and Rob let Neil in. He explained the situation and also warned Neil not to follow him anymore. "Give your time to the 'ladies'!" Neil, though a professional who had seen a lot, was nonplussed by the rage in Rob's voice. Soon they all had left and nobody dared to look him in the eyes. He heard their cars start and soon it was silent in the house. Rob searched the house, looking for clothes they forgot and he threw everything he found in a plastic bag and placed it outside the door. Then he finally went to bed, angry, tired and lonesome, so very lonesome... The next morning when he went out with his dogs he noticed that the plastic bag was gone. He saw a car parked across the street and with big strides he walked towards the driver. He had seen the man before and he opened the door. "I told Neil to piss off, that holds for the whole organization," he said angrily. The man apologized and said he was just doing his job, but Rob was relentless in his anger. Finally, after contacting the organization, the man drove off. Rob now felt somewhat more relaxed and his anger gradually left him. His dogs were cheerful, they wanted to play, the weather had cleared up and he felt relieved, too. He walked for an hour and came to the parking place, where he normally would park his car. He saw Michelle's car once again, but in his anger he didn't trust her. After he had met her the last time he had searched for her name on the internet, and he wasn't really sure, but he thought he had recognized her on a local S&M site. Then he had made an inquiry using Helena's security organization and they confirmed his suspicions that she was that person. He walked past the creek and let the dogs go. All of a sudden he heard the voice of a woman calling his name. He turned and saw Michelle gesturing to him. She walked towards him with a steady pace and greeted him waving her hand while asking, "Why didn't you wait for me?" "Because I don't trust you, Michelle. I have thought things over and I am wondering whether you came here on purpose to find me. Lately I have become more and more suspicious about women and you had something about you I couldn't put my finger on the last time we met, but then I recalled our conversation, and you didn't blink or flinch when I mentioned Mistresses. I think you are in the 'scene' too. No - I must confess - I know you are!" It was as if he had hit her, her eyes widened and she said softly, "So you found out about me?" "Are you taking me for a fool? Helena has a security organization which I can use. Of course I found out about you. You are the successor to Iris in that S/M group. Don't even think about giving me a spanking or whatever you want to do, I won't stand for that." "What a temper you have!" In spite of herself she backed off. "I can see now for myself why Iris had an interest in you." "Don't you think about repeating it," Rob threatened her and left her. She didn't follow, shook her head and walked back. Rob felt better, now he had warned her but then his bad mood came back. Michelle had triggered his anger and by admitting that she was indeed a Mistress and that she had the same interest as Iris in him, he would be fully ready for her and not in a submissive way at all. Friday, the next week The day was normal for Rob. Like on previous days, a few walks with his dogs, doing some shopping and making dinner. He had heard nothing from any of the women and their silence didn't matter to him all that much. He was on the point that should they not come, he would sell the house and depart from this part of the country. He was fed up with their games and one way or another he would change things. At 22:45 he decided to take his normal walk, it would normally take him some 30 minutes, but today he postponed his homecoming. He had put out all the lights when he left and made sure he wasn't home before 23:30. When he came home at 23:35, all four women were standing on the stairs leading to his front door, shivering from the cold air. He ignored them while passing by, he opened the front door and they all followed him, silently. Helena looked at him with her big brown eyes and whispered, "Are you really going to punish us?" Without a trace of compassion Rob said: "Yes, go upstairs, undress, I want this behind me before 24:00. Afterwards you may choose to leave or stay, I don't care one bit, but don't think that you will sleep in my bed, any of you." With a grim face he looked at them and nobody dared to look him in his eyes, only Kim tried to smile at him, but when his cold eyes rested on her, she also looked down. Helena went upstairs and undressed. She was wearing a very sexy outfit, consisting of a black satin corset, black French knickers and black seamed stockings. "Everyone out," Rob ordered as she stood waiting on the landing. While she unfastened her corset, Rob laid down a few cushions on the end of the bed in their main bedroom. Then Helena came in and when she saw the cane in his hand she turned pale. "Do you want something in your mouth? I don't want you to bite your tongue," Rob asked. She shook her head. "Bend over," Rob commanded and when she was lying over the cushions, her butt in the air, Rob measured where the cane would come. He took some more distance and with considerable force he gave her the first blow. Helena gave a cry and the women came upstairs, worried about what they heard. Rob closed the door and looked at the welt that had appeared on her arse. Then he gave her a second and a third, each time Helena shrieked and then she started to sob. "Halfway," Rob mentioned to her without pity. Without further delay he gave her the last three strokes. Helena moaned when she rose. Rob looked at her behind: each bum had three nice strokes that what were red now, but soon would become blue. "I'm not done, go downstairs, put your clothes back on and we will discuss the coming weeks here." He opened the door and said "Next." Marion came in, looked at him defiantly and said, "I want six strokes." "As you wish, bend over," and Rob didn't withhold his strikes on her. Like Helena she had started to cry after the second stroke. Rob inspected her arse and said "You will have six blue marks in a few moments." Then he administered the last four strokes and each time Marion shrieked. When she stood up, Rob noticed even some blood, but he didn't have any mercy. She knew exactly what the price she was paying was for. His following victim was Cathy, unlike the others she wanted something in her mouth and also wanted to receive six strokes like Helena and Marion. He gave her the thick stick he had used when he avenged his kidnapping by Iris to bite on. She bit hard on it and when he gave her the six blows she moaned but didn't cry and when he was done, she, too, had her six strokes next to one another, very neatly done. Kim entered, already crying, she had given first-aid to Helena and Marion and now Cathy's behind was being treated by Helena. He saw her standing on the landing, still naked, with accusing eyes. Kim also wanted six strokes and the stick in her mouth, she knew what to expect and was a bit afraid. She was crying. Rob didn't want to be too harsh with her. Still, she needed to be marked, too, and without very much compassion he told her to bend over and he caned her six times without a break. She had cried even harder when he was done then the others had and he told her to put on her clothes after she was treated by Helena. He passed them all and went downstairs and waited for them to come down. He poured himself a whiskey and looked at the time: it was 23:55; he had used approx five minutes per beating. One after another they came downstairs again, their eyes afraid, except Marion's, she watched him with a hostile look. Rob just looked back with cool eyes, they had deserved the beating in his opinion. It was his party now. "Sit down all, and if you have pain in doing so, the better. It will remind you of my pain. Things are going to change around here." They all did what he said. Rob wasn't sitting on the couch for a change, now Helena, Marion and Kim sat themselves there, using the cushions for a bit of comfort. Cathy sat silently opposite him, she took it all indifferently. "Cathy, since you look to be in good shape, maybe you could pour yourselves and the others something to drink. This is one of the changes, you will all fix your own drinks from now on. Furthermore, when you stay here, we will all cook taking turns, I'll do my part, but I expect you all to take a turn as well. When Cathy or Kim have been working during the day, they are to be excused. That goes the same for Helena when she has to sort out business. Is that clear?" All four women nodded. "Good, the same goes for making coffee, breakfast and so on, don't assume I will do it. I will be doing my part, but I expect that others will do that too. Agreed?" Again all four nodded their heads. "A very important point: yes, I did hurt you, but don't think you can do it back. Marion, you are watching me in a very hostile way, but I promise you now, if you do a session with me and I notice you are going too far, I will safeword. If you choose to ignore it, then it will be your leaving or I will leave. No doubt about that. You all deserved some kind of punishment, and I didn't feel any pity for you. I hope in fact that you all had a bad week, anticipating this evening." Rob saw on the expressions on their faces that he was right. He chuckled and went on, "I'm not done yet. Somehow I expected you all to come, so I arranged a surprise for you, I don't know if you will like it, but I sure do." "What kind of surprise, Rob?" Helena now looked him in the face for the first time. Her tears were gone; she had updated her make-up and seemed better now. "Last week you wanted to rape me and you all did," they started to protest, but Rob just said, "it was a mental rape," and they were all silent instantly, "and you ignored my safeword, once again." He continued "The original plan was to do some kinky shopping, as you called it, the suggestion came from Helena. I have made some preparations. I know your sizes, and I bought four identical dresses for each of you in your size. Tomorrow morning we will go to the mall in N.; nobody knows you there and to prohibit further recognition, Helena, I bought four wigs, all the same color and you will all wear sunglasses. Believe me, when the people see you and me, we will attract attention. But, that's part of my game. I have also arranged protection, all journalists will be taken care of and also any possible bullies. Don't think for a moment you will be unsafe, I will have four men circling around us. I have a 'babysitter' arranged for Nicky and Inca, so we have the whole day long to ourselves. We will have dinner in a fancy restaurant, I have booked nine seats, for our bodyguards and us. Remember one thing, I will have respect now, you will notice when you wear your dresses and the people will see us walking together. I forgot to mention, you all have to wear black stockings tomorrow, I insist on that." Very surprised, the women started to ask questions, but Rob made them no wiser. They even forgot the hurt they had. Marion came to him, when he had gone to the kitchen and apologized for herself. "I won't hurt you Rob, I am just so glad we have made up," and she wanted to kiss him. Rob took a step back and said "Let's see if you still want to kiss me tomorrow evening. Your punishment is not over yet." Somewhat puzzled Marion went back to the others and told them what Rob had said. Helena then asked Rob to show them their dresses and the wigs. Rob didn't mind, they probably couldn't sleep well anyway and got the dresses from a cupboard upstairs and gave them each their dress. When they tried them on, the size was good as Rob had predicted, they noticed what Rob meant by saying 'to attract attention'. The back of their dress was long, over their knees, but the front was as short as a mini skirt and the tops of their stockings would be visible when they were walking. "This is my suit," said Rob as he put it on. It was made of a deep black satin material, he looked superb in it, it was custom made, and when he moved, the suit had shades of black all over it. "Now I see," Cathy said, in spite of herself she had to laugh, "You will walk there in that mall and you will be accompanied by four almost identical sexy women." "Now you see the picture, but I didn't want Helena be recognized, so now you know all. Oh, and we will buy kinky stuff, dresses, lingerie, toys, whatever. Nobody will know who we are, so give it your best shot. Helena is rich, she will pay for all." "But of course," Helena said, "let's have a great time." She sighed. "My behind is hurting, Rob." "Just to let you wiggle your arse better," Rob now mocked her. Helena laughed a bit but it was humorless, this time the joke was on her and she didn't like it. But the tension was broken and all fancied the idea of going out and maybe having some fun. "One last thing, Helena. The security is on an unofficial, voluntary basis, at arrival here I will give them all a letter containing 1000 pounds, they must spend it partly in that mall, for their cover and the rest is their payment. It won't show up in the books of the security organization, officially you are at home with me." "So you had figured this all out Rob?" Helena asked. "You were pretty sure I would come back to take my 'gifts', then?" "I wasn't sure; I decided to take the risk. I also met Michelle, I had met her before, and I didn't trust her then. I took the opportunity to let your organization to do some background research on her. She is the follow-up mistress to Iris. She could understand Iris she told me, she was intrigued by me for some stupid reason." Helena kept silent. She had her own thoughts about how Rob had handled things. She wasn't used to it, that someone else had pulled the strings. Rob examined her face and then he said harshly, "I'm going to bed; the limousine will be here around 9:00. I will make the coffee tomorrow morning, that's it. Good night," and Rob left them and took an empty bedroom. The Struggle Ch. 02 Author's Note: This is the fourth story in the chain "A game within a game." Characters: Rob - main character Helena - his wife Marion - widow; very much in love with Rob Cathy - friend (psychiatrist) Kim - friend (local doctor) Kate - sister of Helena Carmen - friend; member of the circle (women society) Bridget - friend; owner of a theater shop (- and more mature items) Michelle - friend Lisa - owner of a bridal shop Olga - friend; member of the circle Helga - friend of Olga Jenny - Rob's ex-wife Sylvia - member of Helena's security organization Nicky and Inca - Rob's Doberman dogs Reader, this story is the follow-up of 'a game within a game part 1-2-3'. Actually it's part 4, but the title didn't cover the contents anymore. * Sunday morning. He awakened early; there were no sounds to be heard. He still felt his arse, it was a bit sore but he had to admit, when the dildo disappeared from his arse, he had felt a bit empty. It had been fun actually. He would thank them for setting it through... He looked at his watch; 06:30 and it was Sunday. Still he got out of bed and took a hot shower. He had strange feelings; he lived with four women in one house and yet felt lonely sometimes. Again he thought of the time with Jenny, that she had cheated on him with other women, but he didn't know and in his ignorance he was happy. They had not pulled him in; he had done it to them. Who was the caring person? Who was disregarded again? He grumbled a bit. No, from now on he would be more selfish. He took his dogs and went outside. He immediately noticed a parked car with a lonely figure in it. He decided to ignore him or her, he had enough of that. He wasn't followed. In a fast pace he went to the forest and there again he saw Michelle's. He let his dogs go and soon he heard them barking out of joy, they had obviously met their buddy Boris. However, he wasn't so very keen to meet her but still he had to watch his dogs, so he went to the creek and saw the three dogs running through the water. He saw Michelle sitting on the fallen tree again and she waved to him but he did not come closer. She noticed, stood up and gradually walked towards him. "Good morning, you are early," Michelle greeted him. Rob wished her also a good morning, with a neutral voice. "Are you angry at me?" Michelle asked. He saw Michelle was getting a red color on her face. She still had some decency in her , he thought. "I'm sorry Rob," she answered crestfallen, "I should have told you from the start. It was unfair but it was not on purpose, believe me. I realized only later who you were. I hope we still can be friends." "Friends?" Rob mocked, "I have enough Mistresses as 'friends'. I can't handle one more." "I'm not you're Mistress," Michelle answered, speaking softly. "And you will never be," Rob said rigidly. "And now I will make my normal rounds," and Rob whistled to his dogs. "Can I come along, Rob?" Michelle asked softly. Rob looked at her. "You're behavior is so totally different from other Mistresses that I know, and yet you will become the head Mistress? I thought you would be more imperative." "There is a difference between being friendly and polite towards a friend, and being the Mistress for a submissive," Michelle said. "I am neither," Rob said defiantly. "Aren't you? I thought we were going to be friends," Michelle said with a soft tone in her voice, yet impishly. "And what do you propose? Would you want me to introduce you to my circle of friends? I don't know anything about you," Rob answered, still hostile. Michelle suddenly started to cry; she leaned against a tree and covered her head. Her shoulders were shaking, Rob recognized her agony, this wasn't about him, this was bigger and he stepped towards her and grabbed her around the waist and pulled her against him. She turned and kept crying, but now rested her head on his shoulder. "I'm sure you are not crying about me. What is the matter, Michelle?" With a broken voice she said, "It is about you, but also about other things, like the responsibility. Do you think I want this? It was forced on me, I was 'volunteered' by people in the group that they call 'elected', but not because of the power that I wield, or that I even wanted it. No, they just decided I had to be their new Queen. You know, as a Mistress I am popular. I look good," she looked at Rob to see if he agreed with that. Rob nodded and said, "Yes, you are gorgeous." "And I am also a good Mistress, I can be a very severe Mistress for the pain-sluts, but mostly I see myself rather being a play partner, one who gives and receives." "Sounds familiar," Rob remarked drily. "I just want to have fun, without all that - stuff. The problems, the inauguration, all obligations to my fellow Mistresses, I don't want it, but they are pressuring me." "Who are they?" Rob asked curiously. "Powerful people, rich people, otherwise bored people, I think a lot of them are just interested in the kinky stuff, and not what the play is meant to be." "You sound sincere," Rob admitted, "What about your submissives? Don't you have friends among them who can help protect you against those who are after you?" "You have no idea Rob, how powerful some of these men are. I can't resist them; I'm so tired with all of the fighting." "For a Mistress, you sure do cry a lot," Rob said harshly. Michelle's face shadowed again, and she turned away from Rob and her shoulders shuddered. Rob knew he was not being friendly to her, but she was a woman about his age and she should learn to just say no - just as she had said to him when they had first met. He went to her, took her head in his hands and kissed her wet face and pressed her against his, caressing her long hair. She relaxed a bit, and when they walked back to her car, they held hands. Rob felt a lot of pity for her. As they arrived at her car and she had Boris jump into the back seat, she kissed Rob, this time he didn't back off and he kissed her back. She could not let him go and held him in her arms, resting her head against his shoulders. "Hold me Rob; please hold me for a few more moments. I feel so alone," she whispered. "Her as well as me," Rob thought, he had the same thought just this morning. Finally she let him go, looked him in the eyes and gave him another kiss. "Goodbye Rob," she said softly and went to leave. "Wait," Rob said, "I don't even have your address and phone no." Rob received it and told her, "I do care for you, Michelle," and with a soft smile on her face she finally drove off. Rob walked back, very slowly, thinking about this strange meeting. Michelle didn't just kiss him, this was a passionate kiss. The others would not like it, not at all. He knew Helena was tolerant, but this woman was going a bit far. He sighed; he wouldn't encourage Michelle any further. Maybe Helena would pity her. He decided not to tell anyone about his meeting this morning, at least, not about the kiss. When he came home, they were all downstairs in the living room. The TV screen was on, Helena was busy in the kitchen, Kim and Cathy were sitting on the couch just wearing their nightgowns and negligees and Marion was upstairs, making up their beds. When he greeted Helena, she came up to him and kissed him. Suddenly she stiffened and with accusing eyes she said "You smell of a perfume I don't recognize." Rob knew he had to tell her and said, "I met Michelle again, while walking with the dogs. She kissed me when we said goodbye, so I guess that's the perfume you smell." "You seem to be each day getting more popular with women. Did you have a rendezvous with her?" "No, of course not. She walks sometimes with her dog at the same place where I walk, and yes, we walked together and talked. It appears she doesn't want to be head Mistress at all, but she is being pushed to do it by powerful people, and she told me about how she felt about it." "And she kissed you afterwards?" Helena asked suspiciously. "She was crying, and I had to comfort her," Rob said softly speaking. "I should have known, you make women cry. What did you say to her?" "I treated her a bit harshly, saying she should grow up, not knowing her despair about the whole thing. She really doesn't want it. So, now you know all." "Did you make coffee, Helena?" He wanted to change the subject and went to the kitchen to fetch coffee and breakfast. Helena had followed him and asked "Rob, there is nothing going on between you and Michelle?" "No, I assure you, I comforted her, she was feeling very lonely and in distress. I felt pity for her, after my harsh words. This is really everything that there is to tell." "Are you planning to bring her into the circle?" Rob looked at Helena, "What do you think?" "I don't know, I didn't meet her." "I'm in doubt about that," Rob admitted. "In the past the circle was larger, we were sometimes ten to twelve women,but most of them disappeared after they found a new partner. We were the losers, we comforted each other, but couldn't find a husband or friend until you came," Helena said. "And are you happy?" Rob asked. "You are not easy going,I have to admit. You often make me cry and while I try to do my best to please you, I sometimes don't know what you really are thinking. But, I am often happy with you, not always, but most of the time. And I like it here, I must admit. It feels normal; we behave as a normal family, especially when we are just the two of us." "It bothers me sometimes, like this morning, even with four women I felt lonely." Helena was shocked. "You felt lonely? I thought we had a great time together last night? We had made so many preparations and we even had to drill a hole in the ceiling by ourselves while you were away with the dogs. We had to plan it carefully." "I know - and I thank you for the great time I had. But afterwards I felt cold and I was lying alone. Kim and Cathy were lying next to another, so did you and Marion, while you had both promised me I would be in between. I ended up covering you all up and then I went to sleep in the other bedroom, and yes, I felt lonely," and while he was talking of his grief Rob walked out on her abruptly, leaving her flabbergasted. Helena had tears in her eyes, she wasn't even aware of what had happened last night, she simply was tired and went to sleep. Some things just happened. Rob had put down his breakfast and coffee on the table and went upstairs. He undressed and stepped into the bathroom as he needed to be alone. What he just had said to Helena had been bothering him the whole morning, just yesterday he had announced to them all things had to change and yet, not much had changed. Yes, Helena made coffee and Marion fixed the beds, but there was still no feeling that anything had changed. The worst thing of all was he still felt locked out. He soaped his hair and started to shower. While he was rubbing his hair and rinsed it, the door opened and Helena stepped next to him, kissed him and said "I'm listening to you and I understand. Tonight it will be just you and me, nobody else. We are married, and the rest don't really matter. They are here with the courtesy of us, but you have to feel good about it. If I have to choose between you or Marion,then I say that is not even a choice, you are my husband." Rob glanced at Helena, the water flowed over her long brown hair and over her face, but he knew her better and he saw her large eyes wide open, and he knew she was in distress. He finally had made her listen and to understand him, and he took her in his arms and kissed her. He was holding her, just like he held Michelle this morning, yet he didn't feel guilty. He loved Helena, and while he had comforted Michelle this was totally different. "Another thing, you were all talking yesterday and maybe even debating about getting nipple rings. I hope they all understood that I won't get nipple rings, under no circumstances. Marion knows this but do Kim and Cathy, too?" Again he wanted to talk about something else. He was not very good in talking about his feelings. "Yes, you will have to answer their questions about it but I think you are right. It obviously means nothing to you and it was just an idea yesterday and we'll need to talk about it as a group. Our new wedding must be a special occasion and maybe we can give some sort of party. If we tell Marion it will be like that, she won't be too disappointed about not taking nipple rings. We will just tell her that it must be some kind of a real marriage, and we'll invite some guests to make it more official. I was thinking about the members of the circle and maybe some other old friends, who are open to our lifestyle." "What a good idea, I wasn't sure how to tell her and didn't want to make her upset and by saying it like this it makes a lot of sense. Speaking about those nipple rings, you may know this as well, it can go wrong in terms of the placing of the rings. We all can have troubles afterwards, wounds what don't heal, or that certain places are painful for a very long time. Not to mention that I seriously hate rings on my body!" Rob continued on again, with changing the subject. "What about Michelle? What do I say to her when I meet her again? Should I tell her about our circle?" "That is OK Rob; bring her here if she wants. I think she will need new friends. I trust you will behave like one." "Of course, but I cannot promise anything. Maybe she is too upset, time will tell." After the shower Rob rubbed Helena and she used her towel on Rob and this simple act made them feel very close again. He walked downstairs with a fast pace and entered the living room, where Marion, Kim and Cathy now were watching some TV shows. Helena came behind him, she took his hand. Rob said with some tension in his voice, "May I have your attention? First of all I want to thank you all, and especially Marion for your gift last night. I must admit, I was afraid at the start, I still remember that awful thing that Jenny used on me, but this went pretty well. It was hot, it was sexy and pfff..., I still get horny again when I think about it." He walked towards Marion, and kissed her on the mouth. "I'm pretty sure it was all your idea. A kiss from your 'little girl'!" They all smiled at him and Marion stood up and kissed him full on his mouth. "We will repeat it soon Rob, I enjoyed it very much, and you know how much I like to dominate you." He went on his knees in front of Marion who put her hand on her mouth. She had a pretty good idea what was coming. "Marion, dear, we have asked you to live with us. Would you like it to be more permanent? In short - will you marry me and Helena?" Immediately Kim turned off the TV. With big eyes filled with tears Marion looked at Rob and Helena. "Yes, of course, yes. Will you wear my ring?" "Yes I will wear your ring, like I wear Helena's. But, Marion, you already know that I have decided not to take piercings and I won't change my mind about this!" Tears came into Marion's eyes and she wanted to say something. "Marion, please let me finish first. Helena and I decided to turn our new marriage into a more official occasion, like a real marriage, and the guests will be our friends from the circle." Marion looked at Rob and Helena, she didn't know whether to cry or laugh, mixed emotions showed on her face. "This is not all Marion," Rob continued, "We want to do the ceremony in the new playroom," and following this Rob was inspired to say, "I want you to be a bride, Helena can be a bride as well. I will be, well," Rob smiled, "ehh, what do you want me to be?" "Also a bride!" Kim shouted enthusiastically. "What do you think, Helena and Marion?" Rob asked. "Definitively a bride," Helena had a devilish smile on her face, "and I trust Kim and Cathy will buy a dress together with you, and I expect you to use the fitting room in the bridal shop." Rob wished he hadn't mentioned he also could become a bride, he was cornered by his own words. Now he couldn't withdraw anymore. Once again a marriage, and he too would be a bride as well. He sighed, "OK, I give up. You got me. But no strap-ons, that was then but not again, not too soon." "No, we'll keep those for our own little ceremony in private, you, Marion and I and two strap-ons," and all the women laughed. "Sometimes I should think before I say something," Rob muttered, but he wasn't afraid anymore. After last night he had finally learned to trust Helena and Marion in full. They didn't listen to his objections and they knew what they were doing. He hadn't see it as degrading him and he knew Helena and Marion would have fun. Women who wore a strap-on and felt powerful, he did not begrudge them the pleasure. "I want to wear a ring from you, Marion," Rob said. "You know I hate rings, seriously. I never wore them, and in the future I probably won't wear them all that often. It is just out of love for you and Helena that I will wear your rings. Women think they look good, but it's just a piece of metal on your body," he said morosely. "I have forgotten my breakfast," and he went back to the kitchen, let go Helena, who was holding hands all the time they were talking in the living room. She had felt him sweat and she knew he really was afraid to say the wrong things. She knew he had to bide his words not to offend Marion or Kim and Cathy. Rob made another sandwich, which he ate in the kitchen. Marion would feel better when he wore her name in a ring? A bit stupid actually, a relation is not a ring, a ring is just a symbol. He personally didn't need the symbol. People are attached to someone, ring or no ring. The same goes for a marriage, the only reason for a marriage were certain legal benefits, but nowadays you could sign a contract and you could have the same benefits. Of course, in their case, the wedding ceremony was for fun, and knowing Helena she would make sure there would be a party afterwards with plenty of food and drinks, and all attendees could stay for the night. The event would still be a great party. But the legal status would not change, ring or no ring. The only thing that could be done was indeed a social contract, in which certain rights to another would be certified. It would give Marion some kind of affirmation of her connection to Helena and him. Marion entered the kitchen, followed by Helena. They joined him at the kitchen table and both watched his face. "What are you thinking Rob? I can see you are worried," Marion said softly. "A ring is symbolic and it gives you no right to something. If you really want to be married to us, we should make a social contract for the three of us." "I know Rob, but a ring means a lot to me, just because you dislike it so much, proves to me you care about me and love me," Marion said softly. "And if you should wear a ring with my name on your nipple...." "Sorry Marion, it's out of the question. I won't do it. I admit, it frightens me. It is something what would be on my body constantly and I am pretty sure it would irritate me highly." Marion's face drooped and Rob immediately tried to cheer her up. "Marion, I have an idea. We'll set up a legal contract, with a notary and so on, which is not very romantic, but it binds you to us, more than a ring could do." He kissed Marion's forehead and then he kissed Helena. "Think about it, dear." Rob abruptly shoved his seat back and left the kitchen. Marion and Helena looked at each other and Helena said, "I don't like to say it to you, but he is right. I like the idea, too, when he decides to wear a ring, but let's face it, it has no legal meaning. A social contract is the only thing that officially can bind us together. I think he has a very strong point. Plus, he will wear your wedding ring." The Struggle Ch. 03 Author's Note: This is the fourth story in the chain "A game within a game." Characters: Rob - main character Helena - his wife Marion - widow; very much in love with Rob Cathy - friend (psychiatrist) Kim - friend (local doctor) Kate - sister of Helena Carmen - friend; member of the circle (women society) Bridget - friend; owner of a theater shop (- and more mature items) Michelle - friend Lisa - owner of a bridal shop Olga - friend; member of the circle Helga - friend of Olga Jenny - Rob's ex-wife Sylvia - member of Helena's security organization Nicky and Inca - Rob's Doberman dogs Reader, this story is the follow-up of 'a game within a game part 1-2-3'. Actually it's part 4, but the title didn't cover the contents anymore. * Meeting Jenny The following week was becoming very busy for all of them. The wedding would take place on Saturday. The official invitations went out (with the dress code!) and Helena even wrote one for Jenny. But that one would be handed to her personally. Rob got her telephone number and finally made the call. "Hello Jenny. It's me..." "Hi Rob. How are you?" "Funny you still recognize me immediately. I'm flattered." "Of course. We had been together for over fifteen years...." A silence fell. "Jenny, I want to speak with you in person. Helena will come along but will leave us alone so we can talk to each other. There is an event going on here this coming Saturday, but before I invite you, I want to know if we can talk as grownups. Is it OK if I come to your place?" Rob could hear Jenny thinking. "It's OK Rob. When do you want to see me?" "As soon as possible, as I am a bit in a hurry. What about this afternoon?" Jenny agreed and for the first time, after almost a year, Rob had the feeling he would finally get the chance to really talk with Jenny. Rob told Helena, and though she wasn't really prepared to go that afternoon, she said she would make herself ready to accompany him... It was an hour drive to the city where Jenny was now living and Helena wasn't ready yet. "Women", Rob thought, "always being late, doing their lipstick or whatever, especially if they want to make an impression". They drove off and soon were on their way to the city where Jenny lived. It was a pretty large town with a large shopping area and Jenny lived nearby, so when Rob parked the car, Helena could walk to the shopping centre. Rob pressed the button of the door bell and the door was almost immediately opened. Helena kissed Jenny, gave her a bunch of flowers they had bought on the road on the way to her place, but Rob was in doubt as to what he should do. Should he kiss her? Jenny decided for him, she grabbed him and pressed her lips on his. "Hi Rob. I'm so glad you are here and we finally can talk. Come in." She almost dragged him in. Helena followed, looking around. The last time she was here she was in such distress that she had no memory of the inside of Jenny's house. Now she took the opportunity and observed the surroundings. It was a very feminine house; it was obvious she was living alone. The house was not very large, but it felt like a real home, tastefully decorated and warm. They went to sit on the couch and Jenny made them coffee. Helena put the flowers in a vase and then brought the flowers to the living room and placed the vase on a cabinet. She noticed a framed photo that was lying upside down, and she went to put it up again. Then she discovered it was done on purpose: the photo was the wedding photo of Jenny and Rob. She didn't want them to see it! She still must have feelings for Rob, Helena thought. Rob hadn't noticed what she was doing, he was examining Jenny's books and cd's. They both went back to sitting down. When Jenny came in with the freshly made coffee Helena thanked Jenny for giving her the address of Rosa so she could find Rob, and then declared that she would leave them alone because she had some shopping to do. She then said she would be back in an hour or so. Helena drank her coffee quickly, said goodbye, and left. "You are very lucky to have Helena as your wife," Jenny started the conversation. "Yes - I am. Still, we have our quarrels, but until now we have made up." Rob sighed. "You sound as if you have problems. I thought you were happy?" "I really am. But you know all about Marion...and now Helena is becoming a Mistress, too. And it's bothering me sometimes." Jenny started to grin. "Come on, Rob. It's what you always wanted. I know, I have seen your favorite websites." "Fantasy and reality are two very different things. Anyway, that is not why I wanted to talk to you. I was asking myself if I still would feel anger when I was with you, face to face, and I have to admit, the answer is not anymore. The only thing that I really wanted to ask you is how come you waited all these years to come out, and didn't tell me earlier, that you wanted to be with women rather than men. It puzzles me, I don't understand. You wasted a lot of time with both of our lives. Not really wasted, but let's face it, if you were so unhappy with me, why linger on?" "Rob. I wasn't unhappy with you. On the contrary. The problem was the need for women started to grow, and it became worse over time. Then, because you didn't really control my life and gave me a lot of space, I had the chance to go out with women and I had sex with them. I did this time and again and it was great, as I had found my true self, but I also felt guilty about you and I knew I would hurt you if I told you. So - I didn't leave you, but as a result my mood became down and angry. I blamed you for wasting my time, while I only had to blame myself, of course. You had no idea. Then, at Marion's place, things changed. I became very angry with you, I totally agree with you it wasn't your fault, but still I wanted to take 'revenge' on you, while sadly you had nothing done to deserve such a treatment. I still owe you an apology for that, I had wanted to do it before this, but I didn't dare to face you again. I saw your rage when I came to pick up my things and I knew words would be in vain at that point. Then I tried to write you a letter, and in the end I couldn't do it. I felt guilty as hell, but I couldn't help myself either. What would be the point of writing you? I thought we never could be friends again. But now you are here..." Rob's face became darker and darker while he listened to her. He still didn't understand. "But why did you stay with me? You haven't given me an answer. That is what I really want to know." "Don't you get it? Because I loved you! I still do, but it is different now. I want women to sleep with and to have sex with, and when you were dressed as a woman, it was almost the same. So that kept me going all these years with you. Because you could almost be a woman, you were gentle, sexy, and above all, not the typical male. Plus it was in a way fun too. And who knows what could have happened if Helena not had shown up..." The words were left hanging in the air. Suddenly Rob felt great compassion for his ex-wife. She was a victim of her own character, divided between women she lusted for, and a husband she loved. It must have been hell to her. "So Jenny, here we are. I have listened to what you have said, and I think I really understand. The bad scene at Marion's place was just out of frustration. I understand that now. Tell me, are you living with a woman now? I only recognize some of your old belongings. I already heard you don't live with Holly any more. " "No. I am alone at the moment. I have had several affairs, but it seems I am divided between two worlds. After a while I get enough of women, all that jealousy and talk and well, you know how some women can be. And then I missed your strong arm. So, after a while I stopped dating. I now just have occasional sex and that's it. I have my job and I am reasonably happy." "God, what a mess we have made. Okay, Here it is, don't be shocked. I want you to come to our private party, which will be this coming Saturday; I have your invitation here." Jenny went to take the paper, but Rob held it in his hands, not yet giving it over yet. "Wait a moment, Jenny, you know that I am married to Helena." Jenny nodded, she knew. "Here it comes," Rob continued. "Saturday I will be the bride, Helena will be the bride and we are going to marry Marion." Jenny started to laugh "You are kidding me!" "I'm very serious Jenny. The bride thing is of course funny, but we will sign a legal contract and Marion will be living officially with us, and she is getting lots of rights. And, she will become my Mistress and not Helena." "Do you want this Rob? Can you handle these women?" "You have no idea. There are going to be two more women living with us. In time they will get a contract too, so I'm talking about four women." Now Jenny started to laugh heartily. The tears flowed over her cheeks from laughing, Rob laughed too; although it wasn't heartily. He knew she didn't mean it badly. "You have all you always wanted. Four women! Are you sure you don't want a fifth? I could help, you know. All those hot bodies..." and again she started to laugh. When Helena came back from her shopping trip, she found them laughing and in a good mood. When Rob told her what the fun was about, Helena couldn't do anything else than to laugh also. She decided not to show the things she had bought to Jenny; she appeared to be more sympathetic than she always thought. Jenny got the invitation and promised to wear something according the dress code. "Can I stay overnight? I see there will be only women at the party. Maybe I get lucky..." She smiled at Helena and Rob and she did something what Helena also sometimes did, she licked her lips like a hungry animal. As old friends they departed, Rob hugged her and Jenny kissed him full on his mouth saying, "I have missed you. I am glad we can be friends again." She also hugged Helena saying she was a lucky woman. Helena and Rob stepped into the car, and Helena told him (Rob was driving) Jenny kept waving until they were out of sight. "She still loves you, Rob." "I know. She said so. I am almost thinking she too could be a member of the circle. I even felt sorry for her." "I know. We will see about the circle, Rob. We will see." When they got home, Marion wanted to know everything about what had happened. It was not a surprise to her that Jenny still loved Rob. "You are popular Rob. You have something what makes some women melt. But these women are not ordinary women. Just like you are not ordinary. We are a strange family." And with these words they were eating dinner, Helena's cook had made a delicious meal and they were hungry. It had been a strange afternoon to say the least. The week before the wedding Every day of the week Rob was busy working in the dungeon. The floor was carpeted, except for the examining room, where tiles were used on that floor and also on the walls in that room. In the examining room the 'research' chair from Cathy's house was placed, and so were the cupboards and other equipment. The effect in that room was cold and businesslike, and to be honest, not very inviting. It kind of scared Rob, although he knew a lot of 'tools' were fake or just for display. They had agreed to the possibility of giving someone an enema, therefore Rob had made some hooks on the wall to attach the enema bags to more easily. There were also nozzles and hoses of all kinds that were lying on some sort of doctor's cabinet. All in all it did look very professional. The medicine kit hanging on the wall was exactly what it was, a first aid kit. Luckily for the one who would be given an enema that the bathroom and toilets were adjacent to this room. The classroom existed of two benches and a front desk. The teacher would be sitting on the desk, while the benches were large enough for an adult to sit on. A whiteboard hung on the wall. Several smaller and larger canes were standing in a basket and a punishment bench was located in the corner. There was also the potential to tie someone to the wall. The dungeon proper had the majority of the work to be done. Rob started with drilling a lot of holes in the walls and floor. The contractors had already put in the electrical service for the trolleys and rail on the ceiling. They must have asked themselves why so many, but that was their problem. From the ceiling hung several movable chains and ropes. They could be used to work with different apparatus, but also to carry heavy equipment to its place. The X-cross was erected on the wall. The frame and bed were located in a corner. The bed was covered with latex as was the floor for several square meters around the bed. The purpose of this all was to be able to do 'water sports' and this would make it easy to clean up after. The hardest job for Rob was mounting the wheel on the wall. Twelve holes had to be drilled in the wall to secure the plate with the spindle. When it was done, Rob needed the help of Helena and Marion to keep the leather covered heavy wheel in place, first it was placed on a bench and then quickly put the bolts and nuts through the holes of the wheel and the spindle. When it was done, Rob removed the bench, gave the nuts the final turns and the wheel was steady on the wall. Of course Marion wanted to test the wheel immediately by fastening Rob to it, but he thanked her heartily and said he had more work to do. He placed the rack to one of the walls, it was just some kind of a ladder, with turning wheels on both sides, so somebody could be tied to it and then easily turned upside down. The special thing about this rack was, it could be lifted so the Mistress could walk beneath the rack and fix all kinds of articles to the upside down body. A very simple, but ingenuous device. The last device was a large oaken table, simple, with cuffs and bands attached. To Rob it looked pretty uncomfortable. The whipping bench was also secured to the floor, near the X-cross and finally they all helped Rob with bringing in the rest of the furniture, consisting of cupboards, cabinets, easy chairs and tables. The one thing Rob had refused to bring into the dungeon was the so called pillory. He thought it was a degrading and humiliating device and when if it was not present, it could not be used. He also knew if it was present that Marion would have used it almost immediately, on him, of course. Rob thought that everything he could think of had been carried out. The lighting had been fixed, via a remote control someone sitting in the easy chair could change the intensity of the light, the angle and at the same time dim the other lights in the room. There was also a sound control, and a dvd player. Usually soft classical music could be heard as background music which would not be disturbing for the 'players'. Several rings lay in the floor, covered by a cut out piece of carpet. The rings on the floor could be used in placing and securing items that could be moved around. The bed was fixed, but the frame could be hoisted to the middle of the room, for example. Then he placed a few chairs and a mobile cabinet near the X-cross and finally looked at the result. The whips, floggers, cat-o-nine tails were already hanging on the wall, together with chains and other s&m material. A small kitchen with a sink for washing your hands and a refrigerator at the back side completed the sanitary area; next to it were the easy chairs placed and two couches with a matching long table. Enough room for about fifteen people to sit on and watch the 'scene'. Past this then there were all the 'torture' devices and finally the entrance. If you walked out of the dungeon, on the right was a bathroom and adjacent clothing room and on the left were a few toilets. The corridor to the wine cellar, with a door in-between, connected the playroom with adjacent rooms. The lift was between the door to the wine-cellar and the door that gave admittance to the corridor leading to the dungeon. During the week, the door to the dungeon was locked, because as Helena knew, her staff was very curious about their 'fitness' room. On Thursday, they were ready. They decided to do a try-out the next day, without doing a scene, but just to do a final test. This would be before the guests who would be given a guided tour of the room Saturday had arrived and allow them to fix anything they weren't happy with. Friday before the wedding It was still quiet at the estate when Rob left for his daily morning walk. He smelled freshly baked bread, but he would have breakfast when he returned. He took his car and drove to the forest where he used to walk, when he was living in his old house. Upon arrival he saw the car of Michelle. He opened the door to let the dogs out, and before he knew it, they were gone, making their way through the dense forest searching for Boris. Soon he heard them bark and rush through water. Again he saw Michelle sitting on the fallen tree and she waved at him. He walked towards her and she said, "Do you mind if we walk further? The dogs are all wet and I don't have much time. I hope they will be dry by the time we are back with our cars." Rob agreed and soon they were talking. "Our play room is ready for the big day tomorrow." Rob started the conversation. "So I heard, I was at Bridget's place and she told me Marion had ordered some gear that she delivered last week. She said something about you were gone, that in any case you were not present. You have had some kind of quarrel I believe? She mentioned something like that, but she hoped you would still welcome her tomorrow. She is one of the guests." "Yes. Helena told me. But I won't apologize to her. I think she should apologize to me; she tricked me with the help of Helena. Bah!" Rob was still a bit angry. "Don't let it spoil your day. Think of your new wife. She will be so happy." "Yeah, You are right, I will behave. You know, I have to do some 'chores' tomorrow and I am not allowed to refuse anyone." He sighed. "What if she wants me to ..." Rob didn't finish his sentence. "What if?" Michelle mocked him. "What if I desire for you to do something for me?" Rob looked her straight in the face and Michelle didn't blink. They had stopped and Michelle took Rob's hand. "I will ask for you, Rob. Maybe more than once. This is my chance to be intimate with you. You may know, but I long for you." "What? You are a Mistress! certainly you have a lot of slaves who are willing to do whatever you desire of them? I'm not special." "You are my friend, which makes it special for me. Helena knows, she has asked about my feelings. She was jealous you know. You were gone and she had no idea where you could be. She thought you maybe were at my place. I'm glad you didn't go there with me. It would have complicated things. Not that you wouldn't be welcome, on the contrary. But - I cherish my friendship with you and with Helena." "Well, you surprise me. After my harsh words I though you would be having reservations about me. I am not so sure to be honest. You are a severe Mistress, and I have my belly full of Mistresses. Too many, too soon and too demanding..." Michelle started to laugh. "You act like a victim, but you couldn't be happier. You don't fool me." Rob then asked her: "Think what you like. So, you will be coming tomorrow? You will be there before the actual wedding?" "I don't know Rob. I will be glad if I am on time to see you getting married. But I will be there, I promise." They talked about their dogs and other things and walked back, the same way as they came. At their arrival at the cars, Michelle gave Rob a slight kiss and said "I will see you tomorrow dear. I'm looking forward to it. I hope you have a wonderful day." The Struggle Ch. 04 Author's Note: This is the fourth story in the chain "A game within a game." Special thanks to NJLauren for her considerable editorial assistance. Characters: Rob - main character Helena - his wife Marion - widow; very much in love with Rob Cathy - friend (psychiatrist) Kim - friend (local doctor) Kate - sister of Helena Carmen - friend; member of the circle (women society) Bridget - friend; owner of a theater shop (- and more mature items) Michelle - friend Lisa - owner of a bridal shop Olga - friend; member of the circle Helga - friend of Olga Jenny - Rob's ex-wife Sylvia - member of Helena's security organization Nicky and Inca - Rob's Doberman dogs Reader, this story is the follow-up of 'a game within a game part 1-2-3'. Actually it's part 4, but the title didn't cover the contents anymore. One more thing: this is fiction of course; but there are a lot of elements of RL described. The fact that so many woman are committed to the main character isn't so strange either: a good friend of mine had subscribed to a dating site and each evening, seven days a week, he had a different date. All these women were between 40 and 60 years old. And they all wanted to have sex; and a shoulder to cry on. These are strange times... The morning of the wedding It was still dark, when the door to Rob's bedroom opened. Rob was already awake, as he couldn't sleep well. The words of Helena puzzled him, what did she mean by "You have to obey tomorrow?" It all came back to him and today was the day he had to obey some mysterious woman. He had promised to do so - it was a very special day and he wouldn't like to be the spoiler. Still, he had all kinds of thoughts about what she had said. The light was put on and he saw that the woman who had entered his bedroom was Carmen. Rob looked at his watch and saw it was 05:30. He moaned and said, "Why so early?" "You know it will be a busy day," Carmen replied. He got up and stood next to his bed. Carmen was fully dressed, but not for a wedding. She wore a tight black dress and low black heels. As far as he could see she wasn't wearing stockings or even tights. Her arms were bare. She was dressed very functionally, hmm, what would be the right word to describe her, not sexy, not tempting, but business like. "Good morning, Rob. I'm here to prepare you for your wedding." She then gave him a soft smile. "When will you marry me?" With this she pinched his naked ass. "Rob, please take a quick shower but don't put clothes on. I'll explain in a moment". With a funny look, Rob went to the adjacent bathroom and took a hot shower. Carmen had followed him in and when he was ready she handed him a few towels. When he was completely dry she directed him to the bedroom where he was ordered to lay down. Carmen had some sort of sweat smelling lotion and she rubbed his back and legs with it. It smelled nice and when she was done Rob felt good. He was handed a bathrobe. "Rob, you have to follow me. We have prepared a little ceremony that will take place in a few moments. We will go to the playroom and there you will be cuffed. Some questions will be asked of you and you have to answer them honestly. You will be marrying a Mistress, and another Mistress will be helping to find out if you are worthy of the mistress you are marrying. Yesterday you promised Helena you would obey us - and I ask you to do this for her." "Err, and who is the Mistress?" "That is part of the surprise. She will be masked and you are to fulfill her wishes completely, Helena insisted on this. The new Mistress and Helena have had a long talk about you and Helena fully trusts her. That's all I know. I am only asked to remind you of your promise. Whatever happens - please her - and you will pleasing Helena. BTW – Marion, your bride, will know nothing about this happening. We will make a dvd of it and perhaps she will see it after the wedding, tomorrow or something. So, remember - everything that will be said and done, will be saved and used as proof. But also, keep in mind that you can hurt people with whatever you say; so, please speak freely, speak about what's on your mind, but try not to insult anyone who might see it." She paused. "I also have to say this again, there will be nothing to be afraid of, or any weird things happening. The point of this whole scene ,and it is a scene of course, is to find out what you can and will give to Marion and to your wife Helena, who will play a great part in the whole scene. It is not all about Marion, but also your commitment to Helena and the other women as well." Carmen looked at him. Rob noticed the small crow's feet around her eyes, the only sign of aging. Her reddish hair was bound in a pony tail and he didn't remember her wearing it like this before. "Are you going to be the Mistress?" "Don't be so curious, Rob. All will be revealed in due time. And no, I will not be the Mistress. I have other 'needs'." She gave him a faint smile and then said, "I can tell you this, this afternoon after the wedding you will be busy. You have to obey us and you know what I want." Rob remembered the day at Marion's house where he had had to 'serve'. That particular day he was 'rescued' by Helena, the start of his relationship with her. She had warned him about bad things that she sensed were going to happen. Today, he once again had to trust her. He made up his mind and Carmen saw his mixed feelings on his face. She smiled to herself, let him sweat a bit, she thought, maybe she was a bit cruel after all, and she chuckled. Rob was unaware of the secret pleasure Carmen had with his uncertainty and reluctance. "Let's go downstairs, Rob. Be yourself and all will be well," she urged him. "Keep your bathrobe on, we don't want you to catch a cold on your wedding day after all." Accompanied by Carmen he went downstairs, they used the new lift. Since it was Saturday, no staff was present. It was silent and when they arrived at the lowest floor, where their playroom was situated, Rob became a little bit afraid. He had setup their playroom, but when it was ready and all the devices were placed, the room looked like an S&M chamber, and not like a playroom at all. He named it a playroom, because he wanted to remove the sinister effect by giving it another name. Still, in this silence and being naked while he was taken to that room, he felt his braveness wash away. Carmen noticed of course and she supported him by giving him a hand and asked worriedly, "Are you still OK?" "I'm a bit weak. I haven't eaten yet, and it's still early," Rob explained, he didn't want her to think he was afraid. Finally they reached the door that gave admittance to the feared room. Carmen took the bathrobe from him and then fastened a collar around his neck. He wasn't used to wearing a collar, it felt a bit strange. To the collar she attached a small microphone. "Go on Rob. You have to walk in freely and by yourself. You'll be fine," she encouraged him. When Rob entered the room, it was silent. He closed the door behind him and looked around. Some modifications had been made since he was been here the last time and the most striking change was the large X-cross. It was fully exposed and a spotlight was lighting it. He had fastened the X-cross to the wall but now for some reason it was standing in the middle of the room, just like it was at that dreaded day at Marion's house. He walked towards it and saw the X-cross was fastened to the floor with a chain through shackles on the floor and on the legs of the X-cross. All the other lights were dimmed and he could not see the back of the room as a result. He heard someone coming closer and a female voice asked him from the shadows while he was standing next to the cross in full light, "Are you here of your own free will?" Rob nodded but then the voice said, "Please say yes or no - I want to hear your answer. All that we say or do will be recorded. I'm wearing a microphone, too. Please answer in full." "Yes - I'm here freely." "Didn't you forget something?" Rob looked at the vague figure and tried to see who she was, but she kept standing in the shadows. "I'm here freely, Mistress." "And You are aware you will have to obey me?" "I will obey you today, Mistress." Rob didn't want to let her think he would obey her always. He only promised today - and nothing else. "Oh, today is perfect for me, I hope it will be for you, too," the Mistress laughed, not entirely friendly. She had him where she wanted him. "I will examine your soul, Rob. I want to know your deepest feelings. Don't make mistakes - you are here freely. I want honest answers, to avoid problems in the future. Can you surrender to me?" "I don't know, Mistress. It depends..." "Depends on what?" "It depends on the questions you will ask. I cannot foresee the future and I cannot go against my nature. If I have the feeling something is wrong, wrong is wrong and I will act as I think I need to. Even if it would violate a promise I made." "Excuse me?" The mistress sounded a bit on edge as well as confused. "Sorry, Mistress. Let me give you an example. If I would be asked to give up my dogs, I would refuse. When I marry Marion I expect that she accepts me and all that comes with it." "That is a good answer. I will tell you, I will only question you and there are no good or wrong answers. The only thing I ask is total honesty. Do I make myself clear?" "Yes Mistress." "Pick up the leather cuffs and fasten them around your wrists and ankles." Rob did as was asked. "Good. Face the cross - I will tie you to it." Rob turned and looked through the upper legs of the X. He heard the Mistress coming near him and she fastened the handcuffs above his head to two chains. Thereafter she made him spread his legs and his ankles were fastened to the x-cross. She pulled a cord and Rob felt his arms stretched until his arms couldn't rise any further. All the while he looked through the X-cross and had still not seen the Mistress' face. He had smelled her, but it was an unknown perfume. He knew she wasn't any of his girlfriends or even from the circle. He did see her hair, it was pitch-black and probably was bound in a pony tail. He knew nobody with this kind of very black hair. He was wondering who she was. Suddenly she stepped into his sight line. She was masked and it was a black rubber one. Her red lips were visible through some kind of lace, and her eyes could be clearly seen. Nothing else; the rubber coated the rest of her face and she was ageless. Her hair was in fact in a pony tail, it came through a hole in the mask and as he suspected, bound together to make the tail. She also wore a black shiny rubber corset. Her breasts were bare and so was her pussy. He saw a tiny bit of carefully shaven pubic hair above her cunt. Her cunt was lovely, full and with large outer cuntlips. She must have colored them, because they were a fiery red and very visible between the garters of her corset. The garters were attached to long black stockings, which almost reached her cunt. She wore high-heeled boots, made from a shiny pvc material and that reached over her knees. When she turned, he saw they were seamed stockings. She wore long black rubber gloves on her arms and in her hand she was holding a short whip. Rob was afraid of that whip, it looked pretty innocent, but he knew it could hurt him a lot in skillful hands. She noticed his gaze and finally said, "Have you seen enough? You are very impertinent to be looking at me like that without permission. I will have to punish you for this, but that you already expected I think. Of course, I don't need a reason to warm your buttocks." She grabbed a chair and a trolley with all kind of whips and other things on it and sat before him, her cunt in full display. "Before we begin, I understand you have a safeword?" "Yes, Mistress." "When it's becoming too much - I'll expect you to use your safeword," the Mistress warned him. "I was told you use the word 'black' - correct?" "Yes, Mistress. I will use it. Red is for a break; black is ending the scene." "Ok - I hope when you must use it, you'll use red, otherwise we may have to postpone your wedding and we don't want to disappoint your new wife again. Do we?" "No Mistress. I probably won't use black, Mistress." "While I'm questioning you, I think I will make myself comfortable." She grabbed a vibrator from the trolley and licked the shaft. Teasingly she looked at Rob and then pointed it at him. "Maybe I'll let you feel this soon." Softly she let it glide between her cuntlips and pushed it in. She began to moan softly, all the while looking at Rob to observe his reactions. His reaction was visible even before the vibrator act, his dick was throbbing all the time while she was showing herself in front of him. Suddenly she came to herself and laid down the vibrator. "Enough of this - for now. It's your turn." She picked up two tweezer clamps with a ring attached and fastened them one by one. The pressure was not too much, Rob had endured other nipple clamps which had caused much more pain, but somehow he knew this was not all there was to be. The Mistress then picked up four rings, on each a led weight was attached and at the other end they had a chain and hook. "These rings represent your friends. This is Helena, your wife," she showed Rob a ring with a pretty large weight attached to it. "This ring represents Marion, your new bride," and again she showed Rob another ring with a similar weight attached to it as the ring what represented Helena. "These rings represent Cathy and Kim." Both rings she showed to Rob had a smaller weight attached to them. Finally she picked a weight, almost the same size as the weight that represented Helena and Marion. "This weight represents me. I'm not sure if you can carry all of us, but you have chosen at least to carry Helena and Marion." She hooked each weight to a nipple clamp and Rob immediately felt the pain through his chest and gasped for breath. "Are you OK?" the Mistress asked, concerned. "Yes mistress. I was not prepared for it, but it's OK." The pain lessened and it became a dull pain. Rob knew when the clamps would be removed, the pain he would endure would be terrible for a few moments. "Are you prepared to carry the weight of Kim and Cathy?" Rob knew this question was a symbolic one; it had nothing to do whether he could endure the pain, but could he spend his life with Cathy and Kim, just as he would do with Helena and Marion. "Yes - I am prepared Mistress." "Good - I didn't expect anything else," and quickly she hooked each weight representing Kim and Cathy to a nipple clamp. He carried four weights now. "Are you man enough to carry my weight Rob?" She showed him the last weight. This had a ring attached with two hooks and chains. "I assure you, it can be very worthwhile. You know Helena trusts me. What do you say? Do you want to carry my weight, too?" Rob looked at her. He still couldn't figure out who she was. She wasn't Bridget, he was sure of that, he was pretty sure he let Helena know he would not accept her as Mistress. Another Mistress. Michelle? Michelle was blond and was much softer than this woman. Her voice sounded familiar and yet in this dungeon all sounds were diffused. The velvet curtains on the walls made sure all sounds sounded differently than they would outside of it. He couldn't trust his ears. Finally he looked her right in the eyes and said, "Let me carry your weight, mistress." "How nice! I'm really flattered." She smiled at him and then both hooks were fastened on both nipple rings. Rob moaned and sighed heavily. The pain ran through his upper torso and finally went dull again. "Now tell me Rob. I heard you feel lonely sometimes. How can you be lonely with four beautiful women who each love you?" Rob sighed. "You can be lonely in a crowd, you know. I sometimes feel neglected, no, I am neglected sometimes. It is at these times that I am glad I have my other two ladies. Are they being taken care off? Normally I walk with them around this time." "Let's not change the subject Rob. Your ladies are fine. How come you feel neglected?" "They don't seem to see me at all, and I am sometimes their servant and not their equal. Which bothers me very much." "And what do you do then?" "I go for a walk with the two ladies who won't ever neglect me or betray me," Rob said with an angry voice. He was getting tired of answering her under these circumstances. The Mistress rose up from her chair, smeared some lube on her gloves and approached him. She took his dick in her gloved hands and started to stroke and squeeze him. His dick was very hard and he felt his juice coming. The Mistress felt it also and gave him a pretty hard slap with a small whip on his dick. Rob shrieked - this he didn't expect. His dick went soft again. "Let's continue. You are sure you don't want piercings? You know how much Marion would like you to have them, don't you?" "I'm sure." Rob growled. "I expect respect from you, Rob. I asked you a legitimate question and you don't have to be angry at me, I'm still your Mistress." "Until I safeword that is, Mistress," Rob growled again. "What a temper you have! Maybe Marion should reconsider her marriage to you and maybe I should pull back my offer to you of carrying my weight." She touched her weight and took it off. Then she removed the other weights. "Be strong Rob," she whispered and then she removed the clamps, fast. The blood started to flow through Rob's nipples and he felt a sharp and hot pain through them. But, he was expecting it and beside a soft moan he didn't give her the satisfaction to show her that he was in pain. He didn't need to, the Mistress knew exactly what she was doing and a smile parted from her lips. "I also heard you had beaten your friends and your wife. You punished them for a pretty innocent game that you took very seriously. I'm now going to inflict on you the same pain they had to endure at your hands." She took a cane from the trolley and swished it through the air. Without a warning she gave him the first blow. She did exactly the same thing that he had done to Helena and his girlfriends and when she was finished Rob had on each side of his bum three red marks, six in total. "Now because you haven't been given me the respect I deserve, I will give you your punishment for that impertinence." Without delay she administered another six blows. Rob tried to escape the blows but in vain. After the last blow the Mistress inspected his behind and rubbed some oil on it. "I don't wish that you cannot sit today." "I have had enough of this bullshit," Rob said very angrily. "Pardon?" "Fuck you! Black," growled Rob. Immediately the Mistress untied him. When Rob tried to pull off her mask, she jumped backwards. "Oh no, you ended the session. It's not finished. I'll therefore keep my mask," and with hasty footsteps she disappeared back to the entrance, leaving Rob behind. The door opened and he saw Helena come in. "I heard you safeworded?" she asked. "Yes. I have had enough of this bullshit," he growled with the low voice she recognized and feared. "You had made me a promise Rob. I asked you yesterday to be strong and think of me. I don't know if I want to go along with you this way. I can only assume you said 'black', but maybe what you wanted to say was 'red'?" She looked at him with begging eyes and Rob couldn't resist her, and kissed her. "That woman was playing with me." "That 'woman' is a very experienced Mistress Rob. You should be glad she made the time to lead you through this scene. We had spoken a lot about you, and by telling her what is bothering you, you can free your mind and let go all your angry thoughts. She is still here. I urged her not to leave. Will you please go on with the session? It is just you and she, a dvd is being made of this session. We will discuss the dvd afterwards. The answers are very important to me, to us. Please continue, for me and Marion, please?" The Struggle Ch. 05a Author's Note: This is the fifth story in the chain 'The struggle'. The story started with 'A game within a Game' part 1-2-3. It is divided into 2 parts (A and B). Again thanks to my editor NJLauren! Main characters: Rob - main character Helena - his wife Marion - widow; second 'wife' Cathy - friend (psychiatrist) Michelle - friend Kim - friend (local doctor) Bridget - friend; owner of a theater shop (- and more mature items) Lisa - owner of a bridal shop Jenny - Rob's ex-wife Sylvia - member of Helena's security organization, special friend of Rob Dogs: Nicky and Inca - Rob's Doberman dogs Boris - Michelle's Doberman Reader, this story is the follow-up of 'a game within a game part 1-2-3-the Struggle'. * The day after (the wedding). The sky was dark. Although it was morning black clouds made it almost appear to be night. Heavy rain was falling from the sky, forming large puddles at the parking area. The black clouds drove slowly by and lightning flashes followed by heavy thundering made Rob's dogs focus their ears. The flashing light gave a sinister effect to the trees surrounding the estate, when they were lit up by the lightning. Helena, Marion and Rob were enjoying their breakfast in the kitchen. Rob's two dogs, Inca and Nicky, lay at his feet. It was still early, they were the only three people downstairs. They were more relaxed now because before having breakfast, they had prepared enough coffee, tea, bread and just about everything else you could possibly think of, which was now ready to be consumed. Thermoses and warm-hold plates did the trick. The guests were still in their rooms, but when they choose to come downstairs after their long night filled with sex and joy, they could brunch in the dining room. Quite a few guests were obviously not asleep according to Marion, but also didn't make haste to leave their bedrooms, either. Marion told them, that she had heard a lot of giggles, moans and other sounds that were not directly sleep related while she passed the guestrooms when heading downstairs. Rob was standing in front of one of the large windows, staring outside. He quickly finished his breakfast because he wasn't in a very good mood and he wasn't that hungry either. He waited impatiently until it would finally stop raining, or at least for the rain to change into a drizzle so it would be more bearable. He was very anxious to get out and urgently needed some fresh air. For some reason he had to leave the estate; away from everybody and to clear his head. So many things had happened yesterday, and he still felt very confused - even after a good night's sleep. What annoyed him most was the questioning by Michelle and her promise that she would become his Mistress. He surmised it was all part of an arrangement, from which he could not figure out the consequences yet, set up by Marion, Helena and Michelle. Also, he was bothered by the 'coming out' of him, dressed as a bride, and later as a French maid. He had the feeling they had in effect programmed him, messing with his sanity and thus lured him into their game. He must have gone mad to have done all that kinky stuff, in the presence of persons he didn't know, yet Though nobody had mocked or teased him, he had felt very unsure doing so in front of strangers, hence his anger when Helena told him to uncover his genitals in front of some 30 women. He felt embarrassed once again, just thinking about the event. He certainly would 'discuss' this soon with Helena, this was the very last time he would let her convince him to play along in her little games. He had felt humiliated and it didn't matter that the women themselves were also undressed, he had been the only male in front of a lot of women and he didn't like it at all - and that was an understatement. It was supposed to be a 'funny' event, especially set up for him, but now he wished he had walked out, even if that had spoiled the 'fun' for Helena. On the other hand Marion and Helena were pleased with themselves, all had gone well during their wedding, and it had been a grand success in their opinion. They had not the slightest idea about Rob's feelings. They were still a bit tired and they knew another busy day was ahead of them, as their guests would be allowed to make use of their playroom, yet under their watchful eyes. Helena showed them the key: "This is the key for the playroom, it's currently locked. I don't want to take any chances that the quests will go back there on their own. The doors may absolutely not be opened until 14:00 hours, under the guidance of you, Marion. Firstly, because they all need to come to their senses and recover a bit from a night of 'fun' and secondly, quite a few of our guests also have to sober up I guess." She gave the key to Marion. "I totally agree," Marion said. "I'm still a bit drained from yesterday, since we tend to do what we can to entertain our guests, and while we had fun ourselves, it's exhausting. I believe that was your idea, Helena," she teased. "And how do you feel, Rob?" "Like shit. I'm having second thoughts about yesterday. I'm also a bit sore in my backside. I wasn't really prepared for you to use such a large dildo on me." He wasn't all that happy about what she had done to him and thus didn't give her a very cheerful glance and the words were spoken with some anger. "Girls learn to enjoy it after a while," Marion said, mockingly; but when she saw his face she didn't like the look he presented her. Her smile disappeared from her face and she looked for help from Helena. At first Helena just smiled while listening to Marion's teasing - until she then, too, suddenly realized that Rob was not happy at all. She decided to ignore his reaction and to hope for the best. She changed the subject. "I think Sylvia is cured from her madness. I was in shock when she acted so very strange. Deep waters..." She didn't finish her sentence. They all understood. Sylvia, their personal bodyguard, always strong, cool, and sometimes even cold, had acted peculiarly last night. From a feared bodyguard she had changed into a submissive woman who would do almost anything, just to please her Mistress. While in the playroom, such behavior was fine, but outside the 'scene', they expected to see her old self, the self-assured and fearless woman on whom they always could rely on. It was as if Sylvia had read their minds, they all heard the knock on the door and then she entered the kitchen, clad in her usual dark clothes: black elastic pants, a black shirt which she usually wore when dressed as bodyguard and black knee-high boots. Her face was made up, some black mascara around her eyes, her hair in a ponytail and she had a faint smile around her vaguely red lips. She appeared to be a bit uncomfortable with them this morning and after a few uneasy, silent seconds, she finally started to make some excuses. "I want to apologize for my behavior last night, I didn't know what came over me. I have never been like that before. By seeing all these 'things' something must have been awakened in me, which I didn't know I had in me. Hell, I have seen these kind of things plenty of times nefpre, but I never had second thoughts about it." Her head drooped and it looked like she felt a bit embarrassed. She wanted to say more but Helena cut her off. "It's alright Sylvia. I have known you for so many years, somehow you didn't know yourself as well as you always thought. Be glad it happened here and you were amongst friends. Please sit down with us and have some coffee." With some uneasiness Sylvia sat at the breakfast table, but seeing nobody was referring to last night she became more relaxed and soon she was consuming her breakfast. Rob looked a bit warily at her because she had been so determined to make love to him. In his mind, she probably had lusted after him for a long time and she had finally been allowed to have sex with him, which was supposed to be her reward for bringing him back to Helena after his outburst. This morning she hardly dared to look him in the eyes, and he decided to try to ignore her, as he didn't want to make it more difficult than necessary for her. "I have to go out, bad weather or not. I don't suppose anyone wants to join me?" he looked at nobody in particular, hoping he could walk solitarily with his dogs. "I will walk with you," Helena answered. "I want to go outside, do you mind if I come along as well?" Sylvia asked. She had eaten fast and quickly emptied her cup of tea as well. "I don't mind at all," Rob answered before Helena could say anything. "Yes, you all go, I'll keep an eye on our guests," Marion then said. She winked at Helena, who smiled back. Rob noticed that and asked himself what was going on, once again. Another plan of these wicked women? He groaned inwardly. He whistled for his dogs to come. His dogs expected this and stood waiting for him at the front door. Then the three of them left the estate. Although the rain was still pouring down, the temperature wasn't very cold and they decided to walk toward the nearby forest, where they would have at least some shelter against the wind and the rain. It had stopped thundering and the morning light was trying to break through the clouds. Soon the weather would improve. "Sylvia," Rob started, "I promised you a private session in the examining room yesterday evening, but I think we better postpone it until another day next week, when we have our house to ourselves completely and we are a bit more relaxed." "I totally agree," Helena said. "Sylvia, today you'll have to keep an eye on our guests, because Rob and I will not be present this afternoon!" she said rather forcefully. Rob wondered what she was up to, so far he wasn't aware of any plans, there was of course the wink that Marion gave Helena. "So you want me to be present back at the estate right now?" Sylvia asked, a bit confused. "Yes dear. I appreciate that you want to walk with us in this awful weather, but I would rather have you back there to help Marion. I absolutely don't want more of a mess. Our servants will have a busy week anyway - I'm even thinking of hiring some extra hands to clean up the bedrooms," Helena answered. She looked a bit sorrowed. "This wedding has been fun, but not without its costs. And I'm not speaking about the financial costs, if you get my meaning." "I think everybody behaved last night," Rob said, wincing. "I agree - but I want to be sure they keep behaving. They are probably more relaxed now, their curiosity has been satisfied, but I absolutely don't want any troubles. So, there lies the task for you, Sylvia." "OK. I will go back then," Sylvia replied, a bit disappointed. She had hoped to talk some more in private with Rob and Helena, clearly this was not a good moment. She saw the sympathetic glance Rob gave her and she smiled gratefully at him and headed back. Rob turned to Helena. "I have never heard you speak like that to Sylvia," he said, accusingly. "You have something on your mind." Helena just nodded. "So you have something planned?" he asked suspiciously. "I saw Marion exchange a wink with you, so I guess you are up to something." "Yes, it is one of the reasons I came along. I do like the peace and quiet of this early Sunday morning even when the weather is as bad as it is. But it also gives me the opportunity to talk to you about our next little surprise. Only if you are up to it, of course." Rob looked at her a bit warily. "I have no idea what you're talking about, and I don't like surprises, at least not the ones you and Marion come up with. Most certainly, not after that awful surprise in front of all those women!" He growled the last words. Helena grew weary from his accusations. She sighed. "Remember our conversation yesterday? That I would ask Michelle to be your new Mistress? We have had so many misunderstandings and fights, I'm afraid - and so is Marion - that our relationship will suffer and those misunderstandings will be devastating to our marriage. I don't want that to happen anymore. I don't want to hurt you unintentionally and from now on every game we will play will always be explained in advance. We will still act as your Mistresses, but like you, we will be trained by Michelle - on both sides of the whip." Rob looked flabbergasted. "Yes dear, Marion and I will both become the subs of Michelle, to learn and to feel ourselves what we inflict upon you or anyone else." "That whip is the least of my fears. Your games, and especially those humiliation games, I will not ever accept again. Do you understand? And who do you mean by 'anyone else'?" "You were not humiliated - only in your imagination." Rob protested, but Helena just carried on, overruling his objections. "Let it pass - everybody thought you were brave. And yes, others. You saw Sylvia, her behavior last night will not end like that. She wants more; she has tasted it - and there is Lisa, and there's Kim. They are all our friends, we cannot say no to them after they have received what they needed. And I have to admit, I like to give it to them, I get aroused by doing it. I like being a Mistress, but I want to be a splendid Mistress, like Michelle. I never thought it would be so erotic, so sexy and so satisfying. I still remember I warned you about Marion and Jenny's plan back then, and now I am becoming the same..." Rob was silent. He tried to be patient and polite, and was thinking fast. To give him some more time before answering Helena's statement he fetched a piece of wood out of the dirt and threw it far away. Nicky and Inca picked it up - each on a side - and started to pull. With a snap the stick broke, and both dogs carried a piece of the stick proudly in their mouth. "So you are becoming a genuine Mistress? Maybe even a professional?" he finally asked. "I guess so. I thought you wanted me to be - your Mistress... And professional; only in the good sense of the word: professional to you and to our friends. In fact; I already am, more or less. And that brings me to the other reason I am here with you. You are my life, you know that, and Marion thinks exactly the same about you and me. We knew what was coming and we both had an in depth conversation with Michelle before she examined you. Marion too acknowledged the superiority of Michelle and while you are currently wearing Marion's collar in the playroom, we thought about what would be the best thing for you to do. And that is: to give the collar back - temporarily -- to Marion, and then she will hand you over to Michelle - not in person, but you know what I mean: for the time being and for as long Michelle thinks she needs to guide you. I would like to do that this afternoon. Marion is taking care of the guests for the time being, and I was planning to accompany you to go to Michelle's and talk things over, with just the three of us; if you want to, of course. Michelle is awaiting my phone call right now, I promised to let her know what you decided. I want to make it perfectly clear that YOU decide to go along - or not. It's completely your choice - and your choice alone - we only can advise. Another possibility for you is to wait for our lessons, until we are more experienced, even Marion knows she is hardly as capable as Michelle, and I think Cathy too wants to join in for some lessons. So we all will be very busy - with or without you." "So you have been very active the days I was 'awol'?" "Yes - I knew you were coming back..." her voice trailed off. "At least, I thought you would be - until that awful misunderstanding," she said softly. She remembered her feelings when she was convinced that he wouldn't come back. She also knew he wasn't planning to come back, not until Jenny and Sylvia had persuaded him that he was responsible for her wellbeing; God, she had felt so lost... Of course Rob remembered what event she was referring to, but he didn't regret his follow up action, his disappearance. He had come back because he didn't want to lose her, not like that, but they had humiliated him so very badly, he still felt a twist in his stomach sometimes. He was hurt, in the deepest part of his soul and he knew the scar wouldn't leave him, as long as he would live. The action itself was harmless - but totally unexpected; and unwanted; and it felt as the utmost betrayal: Marion and Helena had peed over him, while he was bound and blindfolded. The humiliation he had felt had made him literally sick, he had vomited afterwards. They didn't stop peeing while he safeworded, they defended their behavior by saying that it was impossible to stop peeing, but then seemed to think it was a good joke. But this he had never expected it to happen, not without a warning and not from his wife and his best girlfriend, now other wife. He felt the twist in his stomach again while thinking about that bad scene. Somehow Helena saw the pain in his eyes and she took his hand. "It still hurts, doesn't it?" she asked softly. "Yes - and it will never pass!" he answered brusquely, letting go her hand and walking away from her with hasty and large steps. Helena stood perplexed, this she wasn't expecting, not after yesterday, the marriage and all preparations she had carefully planned to make this an event to never forget. She ran to Rob and when she walked next to him she took his hand again. "Rob, please wait. Let's talk!" she said, upset. "About what?" he asked defiantly. "I did my duty yesterday, I came back, didn't I? I played along - but that doesn't mean that everything is over and forgotten. I'm not even considering, while I am thinking more clearly at the moment, of giving up my old home. Too much shit has happened and I quite frankly fear the day when something bad will happen again and I won't have a hole to crawl into!" The anger was written all over his face again. "And that stunt you pulled on me - humiliating me in front of all those women - what were you thinking? I behaved because I didn't want to embarrass you any more than I already had, but believe me, again I was on the brink of leaving you. I DON'T LIKE SURPRISES and I surely don't like to be humiliated!" He almost shouted these last words. "But that's why we have to talk with Michelle. She will guide you and if things go wrong - you cannot blame me or Marion. That's the whole point of that exercise. We don't want any surprises; ever again!" Helena panicked a bit. 'Not again' she thought - 'Dear God - not again. After all the trouble we had to get him back' - she didn't want to, but she started to cry. She let go of his hand and turned. Slowly she walked home - her spirit was broken. She needed to rest now - a lot of rest - and maybe like Rob said earlier, it would be better to tear down the playroom. No more games - way too risky in losing him again. It was not worth it - she would speak to Marion and Cathy immediately. Then she felt his hand taking hers - and Nicky and Inca darted alongside and chased after an imaginary rabbit or something. Her face cleared up a bit and she looked at Rob, whose face still was rigid, but the anger she just had seen appearing was gone. "Maybe it is the best thing for us both to talk to Michelle. You probably are right - as always." He sighed. "So you want me to surrender completely to her?" "Yes. Trust her." The relief on her face was clearly visible, she wiped off her tears. Rob pretended not to see. Helena continued "I think she is the best option for you; you already like her very much and she is fond of you. She lives nearby, she went home last night - when everybody visited the playroom, she came up to me to tell you she said goodbye - and that she is expecting you today. But knowing you, she is aware that you may be very reluctant and that she will not be offended should you decide not to go to her place." The Struggle Ch. 05b Still innocent. The next morning it was business as usual, Michelle had some work to do as a notary, Helena had a meeting with the board of directors of one of her larger corporations and Marion was busy at her old home, which was on the market to be sold. As for Rob... Rob just walked with his dogs in the woods not far from the estate. He mused about the things that happened the last day and the things what he would be doing next, at Michelle's place. There had been a change of plans, the BDSM meeting where he would wear Michelle's collar had been postponed until the end of the week. This was because on second thoughts Michelle had some urgent business to do. He was expected at 16:00 and would stay at her place for the night. Tomorrow they would do a 'thorough' session - whatever Michelle meant by that. He suspected a long day and he sighed. This morning they had a talk and he admitted that he trusted her. Helena had urged him to go to Michelle's, have dinner with her at her place and stay for the night. She made clear she wasn't available all day and probably would be home very late in the evening. So she persuaded him to go along with Michelle and get somewhat more acquainted and relaxed with the 'Mistress' side of Michelle. Maybe tomorrow, or otherwise, if business let her, the day after tomorrow, she would come as well. While they all had been intimate with Michelle, Helena made it perfectly clear that in spite of last night, they were not allowed to be intimate again. She wanted him to be 'hungry' for her. Rob chuckled, Helena had decided finally that enough was enough, that she wanted him to herself. He couldn't agree more with her, for it was time that they built up a normal husband-wife relationship. Although Marion had been made part of their relationship, it was clear that except for Cathy, Helena's limits had been reached. The day passed slowly. He had to leave his dogs at home while at Michelle's place, since they would only be distracted. He muttered, but both Helena and Michelle made it perfectly clear, that his dogs were safe, they would go out on time plus it would be good for him to be without their 'protection', as they called it. It was 15:00, and with a sigh he packed his belongings, enough for a couple of days at Michelle's place. Michelle had insisted that he bring some female clothing to go out with in public; maybe they would and maybe they wouldn't, but she told him she would have the last word on it. Also, he wasn't allowed to use his safe word while they were out, as he would not be recognized, nor humiliated, and it was to build up his self-confidence and nothing else. So he drove to Michelle's place, got his things from his car and headed to the front door. The iron gates were open as he arrived, but when he walked inside the walls surrounding her house, the gates automatically closed with the grating sound he still remembered from the last time. A phrase flashed through his mind: 'All who enter this place, abandon all hope...'. With a grim smile on his face, he opened the front door, which was unlocked and entered the house. It was fairly dark, only some soft lights on the walls gave a sinister light. He didn't remember that it was like this, the last time he spent the afternoon here with Helena. Second session. He walked down the stairs to the white door and unclothed. Then he put on his fuck-clothes, as he used to call these clothes, and left the room. He entered the room with the black door and sat on the bench. He wore his high-heels, six inch as requested, nylon stockings, waist-cincher and even a bra. He didn't know the purpose of that, but Michelle insisted that he would wear it when he came into her dungeon. To him it mattered what Helena thought was right, and she had insisted that his nipples be covered and his genitals, too. Black French panties covered his arse and penis. He had no idea how long he had been sitting on the bench, when the door to the dungeon opened automatically and a hidden voice said: "Enter, walk to the centre and assume the first position!" Like in the entrance hall, the lights inside Michelle's dungeon were dimmed. He still could see the path which led to the centre and there he went on his knees, spread them, and put his hands with open palm on his thighs. He waited a few minutes and then he heard Michelle approach. He kept his head down and finally her boots came into his view. "You may look up," she commanded. He did as was said, and glared at the 'other' Michelle, the Mistress he feared. She was dressed in a black leather suit, with high-heeled black riding boots. In her boots she carried a riding-crop. Even her hands were leather-clad. Her face had been changed dramatically: deep-black eye shadow, lots of it, in combination with ruby-red lips gave her face a cruel expression. Her mouth curled a bit, when she noticed that he didn't like his uncomfortable position, and also his obvious dislike of her heavy make-up. "Today you are here to pleasure me, not as the other days, where you had some comfort afterwards. That is not my intention today nor the rest of the days you are spending here. You are solely here for my wellbeing, my lust, my needs and that you learn a thing or two; but that's a fringe benefit, not the main reason. I lured you into my dungeon and now, today, and the rest of the week you are mine. We won't have intercourse, yet you will learn to please me: with your hands, with your tongue and also with your pain." The last phrase of the sentence she hissed at him; to make it clear that he would receive pain. Rob shivered. He had only had been in her hands twice and he knew she could be very cruel. She walked to his back, he couldn't see her anymore and kept his eyes staring at the end wall of her dungeon. "I see you obeyed my instructions, to wear a bra. Nevertheless, next time you will have to wear a cupless bra." "I don't have such a bra, Mistress." "I didn't give you permission to speak, you will be punished for that impertinence; right now. Stand up!" Rob rose to his feet and kept staring in the distance. "Panties down, bend over, hold your ankles!" She took her riding crop out of her boot and swished it in the air, testing its strength. Rob felt humiliated with his panties down. That was the reason for wearing panties, to degrade him. One after another Rob got six strokes, pretty hard and each stroke made a welt on his bottom. She carefully placed the strokes next to one another, striking both bum-sides at once. When she was finished Rob had a tear in his eyes, but he didn't even moan. He would not give her that pleasure. "You can always go home to your lovely wife, if it's too rough for you," she sneered at him. She placed the crop back in her boot. "Panties up and follow me!" Rob did as was asked and followed her to a whipping bench. He had to lay down on the leather-clad wooden middle girder. His dick was free from it, his ass pointed outwards and his knees were resting on cushions. His ankles and wrists were secured with leather straps and tested. He had to try and pull, but couldn't move. His head was resting on the girder and he looked sideways. Michelle was standing to the other side of him, so he couldn't see what she was doing. She fetched some ice-cubes and suddenly he felt her pull down his panties and then the 'fire' of the ice on the welts she had just inflicted upon him. Again he kept his mouth shut. No groans or other reaction was heard. Michelle just smiled. His body betrayed him, although he didn't give one audible sigh of discomfort with groans or moans, the way his body stiffened was enough proof for her that he had felt it as she desired. She fetched a wooden paddle, just an ordinary paddle used with ping-pong, one side blank and the other side small green rubber naps. She started to swing the paddle on both sides of his behind, one after another; now and then the blank side exchanged with the rubber side, which gave another effect. She started slow, almost tenderly, sometimes caressing the reddening flesh and thereafter giving a swing with a lot more force, then again slowly and so on. Rob never knew what came next, and he flinched his arse, but to no avail of course. Michelle was determined to give him a tough spanking and was not satisfied until the whole of his arse was deep-red. She avoided making welts, like she made with the crop, but she knew that each new hit on his tender flesh would generate real agony. She noticed he was at the brink of safe-wording and quit the spanking. "For now this is enough." She unfastened his restraints and he had to stand up, his hands on his neck, his panties on his heels. "I think I warmed you up for the next part," while caressing his bums. She unfastened the black lace bra he was still wearing, his waist-cincher and his stockings dropped upon his high heels. He was ordered to take all off; finally he was totally naked and then he had to walk to the x-cross. There she fastened him again, hands up; each to a side of the X-cross and he had to spread his legs. Again he was tied up, this time standing on the tip of his toes in what was an extra torment. He almost hung in the restraints around his wrists and was very uncomfortable. Michelle fetched several cat-o-nine-tail whips, made of different materials and started lashing him. At first she used a deer-skin whip, that particular material didn't hurt much, later she switched to rougher materials like thicker leather, rubber and even plastic. Each whip felt different, from tender to very painful to even pure fire, and his back became as red as his arse. When she thought it was enough she unfastened his restraints again and lead him to a cage. He had to crawl inside, he could not stand up, but also could not sit down well and again was very uncomfortable. "I see I made you sweat, I will cool you off." Then she grabbed a hose and Rob was cooled off with cold water. Finally he had had enough of it and spoke his safe-word. "Black!" Immediately the cage opened and he climbed out. "I have had enough of your bull-shit. I have no idea what you are planning for me, but this was enough." "Trust me Rob," Michelle responded. "So far you're doing fine. Here's a towel. I expected you to safe-word at this point. My gain is that you behaved yourself. You didn't curse me, not really, you didn't go mad, in fact, you reacted as I wanted you to. Haven't you noticed yourself? I was testing you, not how far could I go without really hurting you, but to what point you would decide enough is enough." Rob was confused about her statement. "You wanted me to safe-word?" "Yes. I wanted to measure your reaction, so that we can discuss it and that you don't run away. We are still talking, so I think we are progressing. Don't you think?" "Probably. Yes." Rob was thinking. She was right. Normally he would have reacted pretty violently to the things she did to him. Now he understood the reason behind it all, it was just a test, everything she did was to make him angry and so far he had behaved. He safe worded because he was getting cold, not out of real anger. "Kneel, Rob." He did as was asked. She untied the leather suit and stepped out of it. Under the suit she wore just a garter belt with attached stockings and a open cupped bra. "Look at this bra. Soon you and I will buy a bra like this for you to wear." Rob liked what she said. Going to a lingerie shop was always fun. Michelle looked upon him and smiled too. 'He thinks he will like it, buying lingerie with me' she smiled in herself. "Now make me cum, lick me, and do it well." She pushed her shaven labia into his face and Rob started to lick the inside of her cunt. From the first moment he tasted her juices. "Yes. You noticed I am wet already. Doing these things to you made me hot." Rob carried on with licking and sucking her pussy. Then he concentrated his efforts on her clit, and finally she came. She squirted into his face, and Rob had some drops on his cheeks. He wanted to rub it off, but a sharp reminder from Michelle prohibited that action. She lashed his back with the crop: "Don't you dare to wipe it off, the lovely juices of your Mistress are sacred, enjoy the smell of me. I forbid you to wipe it off, don't you dare!" Michelle could squirt, she knew that if she was very aroused it sometimes happened, and today was such a day. From the start she was horny, even at the office. When she was at work, she was thinking about the things she wanted to do with him, and it made her hot. She had scrunched her legs together, hiding them under her bureau, and almost came at the thought. Her secretary had a funny look on her face sometimes while looking at her. She suspected something, but couldn't say a thing of course. Michelle reminded herself she had to work here, and unexpected customers could arrive at her desk, and she should behave herself. So she went to the bathroom, and there she used a vibrator to release the tension what was building up in her. After her climax, she went back to her desk and only then she was somewhat more relaxed and dove into her work. But at certain moments, when her thoughts drifted far from this office, she got the feelings again and finally she decided to go home. Once at home she used a large vibrator and a smaller one, to fill up her arse and cunt at the same time and she had once more a violent orgasm. The whole of her body shivered when she came, and that was the state she was in when Rob entered her home. She was horny as hell and could not wait to start her game. Now she was looking at the man who gave her a tremendous orgasm. "It's a pity Helena wont allow you to come. Ah well, arousal is good for you. It gives you strength to endure more, shall we say, inconveniences?" "If you say so!" Muttered Rob. "Remember - you are still under my command," Michelle warned him. "Black!" Rob immediately responded and stood up. "Now I have had enough of it. I haven't even had my dinner yet. I have no idea what you want to do, but I want something to eat, and now!" "Naturally, I'm hungry too. I did all the work, you just stood there," she teased him. "Please put on your clothes again." Rob walked towards the dressing room, but halted on Michelle's command "Stop!" "I want you to wear to what we agreed to: stockings and so on." "While we are having dinner?" "Yes. We are not finished yet, so put on the clothes you just wore." Without any further comment Rob did as was asked. "When you are ready, please go to the dining room. If you brought along a negligee, I suggest you wear that, too." Then she was gone. In a hurry she walked upstairs and took out her cell phone, dialed a number and when the phone call was answered she told the person on the line to bring the ordered food. She smiled when she finished the phone call and slowly walked back to her dressing room. Rob was still in his dressing room, fastening the nylons to the waist-cincher when she opened the door. She enjoyed the view for a few seconds and then said, "Rob- Like I said, when you are ready, go to the dining room. I ordered some food and I'm expecting you to open the gate and the front door as well and to accept the delivery. You will find some money on the table to pay the guy. Give him a tip." "You don't expect me to open the door the way I'm dressed, do you?" "Oh, yes. The guy is used to seeing my subs, and you are more clothed than other subs. Don't you worry, he won't offend you or mock you. Just pay the guy and be done with it. It will be a good exercise for you." "Black!" Rob said. "This is not part of a scene. The only way you can avoid this, is by leaving. But don't come back here anymore, I won't ever allow you into my dungeon again. In fact, we will say our goodbyes. In that case I don't want to meet you ever again. I will inform Helena about the circumstances and I guess my relationship with Helena will suffer, too. I'm sorry, but that is my condition." "So you use blackmail?" "No! Like I said, the guy who delivers the food is used to seeing people like us and won't talk about it. You are perfectly safe. Again, you have to trust me. If not, we'll say goodbye to each other and I will know I have failed. So be it." She looked truly sad. "I'll change into something more appropriate," she turned and left him standing in the hallway. She quickly disappeared upstairs and Rob was astonished; he had no idea what to do. Quickly he covered himself with his black negligee, but as most such things, it was a frilly one with ruffles and lots of lace. Luckily it was not the see-through kind. He entered the living room and opened the doors-in-between. The dining room was cozy, candles were placed between the plates and cutlery and wine-glasses were also already placed. He realized it really must be a disappointment for Michelle should he refuse to accept delivery of the food which was ordered from the catering service. She had really done her best to make this a special occasion. When he heard the bell ring from the gate, he walked to the hall and pressed the button that opened the iron gates. A few seconds later the door bell rang... Rob sighed heavily, straightened his back and checked if his negligee didn't reveal anything that wasn't meant to be seen by a third party. Then he opened the door and accepted a heavy load of food, all packed in plastic, and placed it on a table nearby. The man didn't even blink when he saw Rob, he accepted the money Rob gave him, and thanked him for the tip. With a sigh of relief Rob closed the front door. That went well.... He wasn't aware that Michelle had been observing him all the time, from the moment he entered the hallway until the closing of the front door. She had seen the emotions which went through him, his reluctance, his fear, before he finally opened the door, and the sweat on his face afterwards. She was proud of him, she knew that the glance the delivery man gave Rob meant nothing, but he had had to fight his own anxiety, and being embarrassed in front of a man was the hardest battle. He succeeded. There was hope for them all. She strode down the hall, while Rob was still standing there. When Rob saw her, his mouth opened in awe, she was beautiful. She wore a long blue evening gown, that hardly covered her body, a long split gave him sight of her legs in stockings and she wore black sling backs - with very high heels. Her hair was loose, but her face was the same with the very dark make-up that made her look threatening. Still she had a slight smile when she saw Rob's reaction toward her, for she was pleased. "You may carry the stuff to the dining room table, but please be careful; don't ruin my carpet by tripping over it," she warned Rob. She strode into the room, without giving him even a glance, and sat at the head of the table, impatiently waiting for Rob to unpack the food. "Please get us some white wine from the fridge," she ordered him around. Then he had to fill their wineglasses and finally was allowed to sit. "You behaved well today. You, no we, are not finished yet, but I think we are going somewhere. When Helena arrives I will inform her about our first steps." She pointed at the food. "Please bring the appetizer." Rob didn't hesitate and during their meal he acted as a waiter but also was allowed to participate in the dinner. It was all part of his training day. He was even allowed to sit at the table. Michelle knew him well enough that if she had pushed him further by let's say making him eat on the floor, he would laugh in her face, probably give her the middle finger, and leave. He was a sub, but not at all costs. There wasn't any desert. Rob was a bit confused when she said "Bring me the desert!" "There is no desert, Michelle." The Struggle Ch. 05b "You are the desert. Clear the table and lay on it." Reluctantly Rob removed the cutlery, empty plates and leftovers and was ready to remove the tablecloth when Michelle, with a sharp "Stop!," stopped any further actions. "Remove your clothes!" He quickly took off his clothes. When he was totally naked he held his hands in front of his genitals. Michelle used a riding crop to touch his hands. "Show everything. Hands on your neck. Chest up and look straight forward!" She took a step forward and looked him right in the eyes: "Tonight I will have some more fun with you. This time it will be different." She took a step back and said "Turn slowly!" Rob turned until his backside was towards her. "Stop!" She examined his back. Only slight traces of the welts on his bum were visible, but from the whipping with different cat 'o nine tails nothing was visible anymore. She smiled to herself, she had done well. She had given him a lot of pain, but without giving him any marks. "Now you can climb on the table." He wanted to remove the tablecloth. "Leave the tablecloth. When we are ready you can remove it. What are you waiting for? On the table, on your back, arms spread." Carefully Rob climbed on the table, it was a large dining room table and while he didn't lay comfortably, he wouldn't fall off. Michelle picked up a number of leather restraints, some rope and handcuffs and soon Rob was tied up to the table. Ropes went from his feet to the end of the table and she had fastened the ropes to the table legs. Other ropes were wound a few times around his thighs and were fastened under the table. The handcuffs were used on his hands, then with ropes fastened to the table legs on the front side of the table. Several 'torture' instruments were laid out on a trolley which she rolled next to the dining table. She put a leather gag with a hole into his mouth and fastened it. A small red ball was put in each of his hands. "If you drop either one - I'll cut you loose. Understand?" Rob nodded. She walked round the table, checked the restraints: she had tied him securely. She had used a lot of ropes to hold him in place. This wasn't like the binding at the X-cross or the fastening on the whipping bench, there he had some room to move. This time he was totally unable to move. Cords went crosswise over his chest and extra cords were put on his legs and arms. He could only move his head, but that didn't last long. She had another leather restraint which was thickened in the middle and she fastened over his forehead, then she moved a section of the tablecloth, rummaged under the table and two holes appeared next to his head through which the restraints from his head went through and were fastened to some hooks under the table. Now he couldn't move his head as well. Quickly she slid her dress from her shoulders, she only wore her suspenders, stockings and high heels. From the clicking of her high heels Rob had an idea where she was. He could hear her searching for an item in a nearby cupboard. Then she came back to the table. "If I have the urge I can put this," she was holding a funnel which she shoved inside his gag, in here. Then I can sit on your head and pee into it if I want to. And this is a no safe-word issue! It won't hurt you, I won't pee much and we've done it before. So don't give me that shit that you won't do it, because I will do it!" Rob dropped both balls. She became angry. "You have nothing to say in this!" and tried to put the balls back into his hands. Rob didn't hold them and the balls dropped again. "Have it your way!" and she removed the funnel. "You're no sport." Rob muttered through his gag, but she didn't remove it. She put the balls back in his hands and this time he kept them. "OK. I'll try something else." She squeezed his nipples, turned them a bit, Rob moaned but didn't drop the balls. "You'll learn!" She squeezed somewhat more at his nipples and then put a clamp on both of his nipples. Rob was used to it and expected it. When she twisted his nipples it hurt more, and the clamps hurt only at the beginning. A dull pain was spreading around his chest now. They would soon be painless, Rob knew, but the pain would strike in full when she removed them. As if she read his mind - a moment later she removed them and the pain he received made him moan. She fetched another item from the trolley, Rob couldn't see what it was since his head was still tightly bound. She was fumbling with his nipples again, he felt some sort of scissors held them tight and again he felt a dull pain through his nipples. She came into his sight when she bowed over him. "I have your nipples clamped in special scissors. Both of them have a hole into them." Suddenly he felt a sharp sting in his belly. He shrieked in his gag. She had pinched him with some sort of a pin. "If you like I can use this to make a hole into them." She showed him a very sharp, thick needle with a rounding at the end. "I can put it into you, cut it off and fasten a nice ring through your nipples. What a surprise for Marion would that be!" Rob immediately dropped both his balls. He tried to say something and Michelle knew that she had went too far with her teasing. "Ok. Ok. I won't do it, I was just teasing you. I know how sensitive this is for you, but I could try, couldn't I?" She decided to leave both balls on the floor. "I'm getting tired from all this searching for your balls." She removed his gag. "Now you can say what you want. Are you ready for the next part?" Rob didn't say anything. "Who is silent, admits." "I believe that you are not acquainted with hot wax. There is always a first time and I will take it slow." She used a match to light a candle. She waited a few moments until the flame was burning bright. The candle wax was slowly melting. She dripped a few drops on her hand. Thereafter she used both candles to drip wax on his chest. Again his nipples were hurt, a flash of hot, burning pain, but that was all. She then slowly made a trail over his belly, down to his genitals and there hot drops were falling on his penis and balls. Rob moaned and groaned in his restraints, but didn't use his safe word. Michelle knew that it was hurting a bit, but nothing lasting and he would only have a hot glow for a few moments. "It's a pity I cannot fill your arse with this stuff, you're lucky. Also, I won't use a whip on the front-side of your body, otherwise I could test my whipping skills on your back to 'wipe' it off." When she was finished with the candle wax, she removed it, by using her long nails scratching over his body. Red stripes appeared all over his body, while she took care of the hardened wax. She was - luckily for Rob - more careful with his dick and balls. Still her nails made a few stripes on his stiff dick; in spite of everything he had become very aroused and his dick was throbbing, while she did 'things' to him. Even when she was threatening to pierce his nipples he was rock-hard. That fact didn't go unnoticed and Michelle would talk this over with Helena in private. Rob's sane mind had said no but his body was betraying him. Still, she knew while he had gotten a hard-on from the piercing threat, he still really didn't want it. And if they still tried to pierce him, ignoring his protests, things could get out of hand. He made it very clear by dropping the balls two times, that he didn't want a piercing. "I see some more wax between your thighs, I have to come closer to see it well." She climbed on the table and sat herself over his head and bowed forward, to 'remove' the wax. Of course she just wanted to take his member in her mouth. She pushed her behind into his face and Rob knew what was expected from him. Because his head could move freely, he started to lick her. Michelle took his member in her mouth and started to suck on his shaft, then bit the head of his cock, teasing it and by the groan Rob made she knew it had the desired effect. She stopped and sat straight up, pushing her arse in his face. Rob stopped licking. "Go on!" she hissed. Reluctantly Rob started to lick her arse. The only taste he got from there was perfume. Obviously she had washed herself carefully from behind and had foreseen this. Rob was glad, although he was prepared to do a lot, some scenes he never would do normally; the golden shower was an exception, it could only be done if it wasn't a surprise and if he agreed to it, but that was the limit. She obviously liked it very much, she pushed her behind against his nose, so that he could hardly breathe. Her fingers almost clawed inside her pussy, he couldn't see anything, but by the sounds she was making and the sobbing sounds from her pussy she must be horny as hell. He smelled her, he remembered the taste of her juice and then he felt her moist cunt against his chin. She bent over and he started slurping and licking the inside of her dripping wet pussy. He could only use his tongue, and Michelle slowly rubbed her own clit while she lain over him. Suddenly he felt her mouth again over his dick, and frantically she licked him. He knew he couldn't hold much longer and he stopped licking. "Remember, we made a promise." "We only talked about intercourse, I'm not exactly shagging you, am I?" She continued her efforts. She noticed he didn't continue to lick her and she withdrew her mouth almost reluctantly from his member. "You are such a 'good' boy," she said, disappointed. She climbed from him, and untied the ropes and restraints. Rob got off the table and rubbed his arms and legs. They were sore and the circulation had to be stimulated. She threw him a towel. "Clear your face, honey. You've done very well." He was given his negligee and she bide him to sit on the couch. Before she had started the session, she had made sure the heating was higher than normal, so Rob wouldn't be cold, wearing just his negligee. Afterwards they drank some more wine, while they both sat on the couch. "Tomorrow morning I have some work to do. Will you make us breakfast - no, I expect you to make me breakfast!" Rob nodded. "Did you bring a uniform with you? Otherwise I'm sure I have something appropriate for you." "Yes, I anticipated this." Michelle looked at him. "I could sure use a man like you around the house. I will ask Helena if she would lend me you." She was very serious, Rob knew. "Not if I have to say anything about it, and I do have!" "It's a pity. We could have so much fun..." "Fun, yes. You would have the fun and I would be the one who is enduring the 'fun'!" "So far you didn't give us the fun we deserve," Michelle accused him. "I made Helena a promise..." "Yes. You are a good boy," she sneered. Suddenly a thought flashed through her mind. 'What if he really could see her for the women she was. Would his vows still stand? Soon...' she thought. They chatted some more and finally Michelle said it was time for bed. They climbed the stairs to her bedroom. "If you would really be my sub I would let you sleep next to me, on a mattress on the floor, of course." "Of course," Rob agreed, "But I wouldn't. I would sleep next to you, or in my own room. I'm not your sub, and even if I was allowed, or even suppose you and I were in some kind of affair, I still wouldn't do it!" "No? Not even once?" she teased him. "Mmm. Maybe, just to show you my love, if I were engaged to you, which I'm not!" "I was just curious." Michelle was satisfied with his last answer. She showed him his room, and he went in. With a sigh she went on to her own room. He wouldn't budge, she admitted to herself. She undressed, crawled into her bed and pulled the satin sheets over her body. Despite her disturbing thoughts, she soon fell asleep. The next morning the smell of fresh coffee awoke her. "Careful," Rob warned her. She sat upright, and Rob gave her an extra pillow for her back. He put a tray filled with sandwiches, a boiled egg and the delicious smelling coffee on the bed. Rob pulled the curtains open, and pale sunlight brightened up her bedroom a bit. She almost started to laugh when she saw what he was wearing. Rob was dressed as a French chambermaid, with high heels, a white petticoat peeping from under the black satin dress with white puffed sleeves and a black and white satin ribbon in his hair. He turned around, the seams on his stockings were perfectly straight, from the middle of his high heels, disappearing under his petticoats. "Rob, please turn your back to me and bow." He did and while he bowed, she saw black satin panties, again with white lace ruffles. "If you would have stood near me, I would have slapped your behind," she grinned. Rob saw her amusement and he started to laugh too. "It's funny, I like this uniform, it's sexy and gives me a wonderful feeling. On the other hand, it makes me look ridiculous and a bit ashamed. So I always have second thoughts while wearing it, if you can follow me." "Of course dear. But you can be proud of yourself. You made me an excellent breakfast." "Mmm. That's not what I meant." "I know, but I refuse to talk about your embarrassment. You don't have to be. It's all a game. When you show yourself dressed like this to others, nobody will look at you askance." "I wasn't planning to show myself like this." "Oh? And how were you planning to dress when we go to a large meeting, with a lot of people who are the same as you. You are not allowed to enter the place in your normal, everyday wear." Rob hadn't thought of that yet, because he wasn't even thinking of socializing. The mere thought of it frightened him, Helena and Cathy had both taken a walk with him outside, while he was in drag, more or less. He wasn't exactly looking forward to another try, and especially not with other people around, even if they were into the same things as he was. "I wasn't planning to go to a large meeting, or even a small one, thank you very much. You remember how embarrassed I was at Marion's commitment to Helena and me, a lot of women I didn't know were watching me closely. No, I'm not in the least interested." "You'll have to learn someday." "Why?" "Because Helena wants you to." "Why would Helena want that?" "So you could accompany her." "To such a meeting?" "Yes." "Why should I accompany her? We can go out to restaurants, shopping, movies - even theater. What more does she expect? What do you know that I obviously don't know?" Michelle hesitated. This conversation had gone into another direction as she had wanted it to. She wanted to make him curious; just a tiny bit. But now she was reveling things that had to be Helena's responsibility. "Nothing really. We sometimes discussed whether you would be willing to go out again, to a restaurant or a bistro, dressed as a woman." "Strange. Hardly something to discuss." Rob was not convinced that Michelle had spoken the truth. There had to be more. What kind of meetings? He decided to let it go, for now. "I'm sorry Rob. Ask Helena to what places she intended to go with you." Let her explain it, Michelle thought. Helena hadn't been honest, let her clear up the mess. Rob was entitled to know the truth, but not from her. "I have to go to work. I'll be back about 13:00. I'll expect you to be in the black waiting room, naked this time. I will give you something to consider: it will be a tough afternoon for you. Prepare yourself. I will be the cruel Mistress. You hardly have seen that side of me yet. I know you may make use of your safe word, don't hesitate to use it when you can't stand it anymore. I do, however, expect you to use it only if you really can't take it anymore. It's just pain, no humiliation, nothing special. Your stamina will be tested." The pain that we fear is the worst, she thought to herself. She tried not to smile, still she had a slight curl to her lips. What she didn't realize, is that Rob saw it, and he read it differently. To him it was a cruel smile, in his eyes she anticipated his pain and she enjoyed it, he thought. He thus wasn't all too happy about what was ahead for him that afternoon. "What do you expect from me in the meantime?" "You can prepare dinner for us. Use your imagination. Make it a simple meal. You can shop at the grocery store nearby for what you need. You may go as you are, but somehow I doubt that you will," she said mockingly. "See you later," and she disappeared into the bathroom. A moment later Rob heard that she was taking a shower and he walked to his own room. It wasn't even 08:00 and he had a lot of time left. Since she expected him to be naked, he put on his normal clothing again, and not his 'fuck' clothes. When it was time, he quickly would undress. He walked downstairs, picked up a newspaper and began to read. He was bored, but didn't want to snoop around. Finally he decided to look in the kitchen to find out what he could make. There were enough vegetables, but there was no meat in the refrigerator. She had some frozen meat, but that would take too long to defrost, so he decided to go to the shop nearby. He had plenty of time, and could probably walk to it, so he did. It took him about 10 minutes to reach it, it was a large supermarket and a lot of cars were parked in front of it. He went in and almost immediately bumped into Cathy. She had just picked up a shopping cart, and was about to enter the store, when they saw each other. Cathy noticed him first, and pushed her cart towards him, and suddenly Rob was kissed. "Hi honey, I never expected to see you here," Cathy said. Rob kissed her back, full on her mouth and for a moment the world only existed for themselves. "I thought you were at some conference?" Rob replied. "I am staying at Michelle's place for some 'lessons'," he said sneeringly to her, making clear it was not his favorite thing to do. "Well, you can always come to my place again for some 'lessons', but Helena thought it would be better if it would be done by an outsider, and not by one of your wives, or a future wife," she explained. "Yea, she said something like that." "I had no idea Michelle lived in my neighborhood," Cathy said. "Me too. I didn't know that as well." The conversation faltered. "You know Cathy, I would rather have it done by you, those lessons. To be honest, I'm trusting you more than anyone else. You have played with my mind a bit, but that is to be expected from a psychiatrist, but you were always honest with me. In fact, you kept always a low profile, and stood by me." "I know Rob. I would gladly have done it. But it was Helena's decision. I think she was afraid that if we ended up in bed that the Mistress-sub relationship would have died, because we would be too close. I believe Michelle is not permitted to have sex with you?" "No. I let her come a couple of times, but I am not allowed to cum unless I'm doing it by myself. They want me to stay me horny. Well, I have the morning off, and I have my right hand, so if the tension is too much....." He didn't finish his sentence. "I see. Well, I have to warn you, when you are aroused, and Michelle wants to play rough, it's easier to bear. Just a reminder." "Hmm." Rob grumbled. "When I have had enough of it, I'm out. Believe me, that decision is very near. I'm fed up. To make matters worse, she is hiding something from me. Maybe you know what it is, and can enlighten me. Michelle spoke about going to a meeting with Helena. She said she had to make me get used to being dressed in my woman's clothes in the company of strange people, who are also 'in to it', as she explained. Do you know what is going on?" Cathy was dumbfounded. "No, sorry. Of course it is fun to take you out, but I do not know about a meeting. Maybe she is planning to go to some sort of a meeting, like when you were kidnapped by Iris?" The Struggle Ch. 05b "Yes. She probably wants me to. However, I have something to say about that as well. I will think about what you just said, I was thinking the same thing. You don't go to those kind of meetings, do you?" "No. I have visited some in the past, but then I had a few 'clients' who fulfilled my needs, and now I have found myself a family and close friends. That is enough for me, so no, I have no idea of what is around these days." "Typical. Helena is full of surprises. One day she will have one surprise too many..." "Don't say that, Rob. Whatever Helena has done wrong in the past, I know she loves you the most of all of us, except me of course." Cathy had a sad smile when she said these words. Rob knew she was unsure about him, his feelings towards her. He took her in his arms and whispered in her ear, "I love you Cathy. My heart is big enough to love you as well. I really do." And he kissed her full of passion on her lips. He heard a few wolf whistles and comments to 'go get a room!' He looked up and saw some guys grinning at them. "I hope I didn't embarrass you?" "No, not at all," Cathy replied. She smiled at the boys nearby. "I have some groceries to buy." "Me, too." They both went in, talking and laughing and when they were both ready and paid for their things, they departed as lovers in front of the shop. "I will see you soon, Cathy." "I can't wait to hold you in my arms again," whispered Cathy, and she licked his ear. Again some whistles and Rob blushed. Cathy smiled innocently and waved goodbye. She swung her hips, rounded the corner and she was gone. Suddenly Rob felt all alone. He went back to Michelle's place and started making preparations. He cleaned vegetables, cut the beef into small parts and peeled the potatoes. Next he made some soup, from vegetables and small pieces of chicken meat. Finally he prepared dessert, a pudding consisting of chocolate in combination with cake, custard and whipped cream that had to stiffen in the refrigerator. He decided to have a light lunch just before Michelle would come back. When he was finished, and had something to drink as well, he hurried downstairs and unclothed. Exactly at 13:00 he was ready. Of course Michelle wasn't home in time, he had no idea about the time, but it must have been at least thirty minutes later when he heard the clicking of her heels. He was cold, there was no heating in that room and he was ill tempered when she opened the door. "Come in!" she ordered him. "You took your time. You said 13:00, and since that time I have been waiting and becoming very cold," he accused her. "That is my decision, not yours. Maybe I did it on purpose. You really have to learn a lot, don't you? You earned yourself 12 strokes with the cane." Rob just said "Black!", turned and went back to the dressing room. He was fuming. He shut the door behind him with a loud bang. Quickly he started to put his clothes on, when Michelle entered. "I'm sorry. I was out of order, you were right to complain about my late arrival. This I hadn't planned, or anticipated. I should have called you, I'm truly sorry. I keep forgetting that you are not a submissive, but are here to learn and you are right, an appointment is an appointment." Rob watched her closely. "And what now?" "Please, come back. Then I can use the cane on you, but not for being impertinent. I will bring you to a new level of play, but not because I'm angry. I had planned this thing so long, you are prepared for it, let's just do it." Hesitantly Rob put down his pants again and Michelle waited for him until he was naked again. She went on ahead. Rob admired her clothes, he was so angry at first that he didn't even notice what she was wearing for him. Now he saw that this time she was wearing an outfit a bit similar to what Helena had wore some time back. It consisted of a PVC open bust bustier, a PVC wide garter belt, with the inevitable stockings attached. She wore an officer's cap, also in black and PVC gloves up to her elbows. She pointed at a chair, he fetched it for her and she sat on it. Then he had to lay down over her lap, hands on the floor. She used her hands to spank him. She started in a steady rhythm, one buttock, then the other. When they started to glow she used more force. Rob moaned a bit, but he didn't give any further sign of distress. Finally she thought he had enough warming up. "Stand up and go the whipping bench!" Proudly Rob walked to the bench and awaited further orders. Inwardly he was afraid, he knew this afternoon she would go further than before, probably further than what Marion and Helena had ever done to him. This was the dreaded afternoon, the one she had him prepared for. He knew, if he could endure it, that they would look at him with different eyes. The downside of it was that they probably would treat him more cruelly. But he could always say 'no', Michelle herself had told him that. When it's no more fun, not fulfilling and only pain without a sexual release or arousal, it would be maltreatment, and that was something he would never accept, but he also knew Helena would never do that to him. So for now he would play their game. "Lie down, face down, legs together and arms forward." he lied down and made sure his dick had some room to grow below his belly. He knew that in spite of the pain he expected, he would get a hard-on, in fact, he already had one right now. The spanking had aroused him and the pressure of his dick against Michelle's warm, nylon clad legs had stimulated him even more. Michelle knew that she would be treating him harshly this time, she was going to test his pain tolerance to a level not done before to him. Helena, Marion and she had talked and discussed this over and over. They had spent some time together in Helena's library, drinking tea and the conversation was to the point and serious. Finally Helena went along with her idea: that she would try to bring him to a subspace level where he had never been before. She would build up the tension, stress level and pain, but would never go too far. Marion had told her that he went a couple of times into subspace, but on the lowest level only. She hadn't dared to go any further. Helena thought it may not be a good idea, but on the other hand, he had to try it once, without even knowing it, otherwise he would probably back off. They were convinced of that. This afternoon Michelle would go for it. Helena had given her permission to bring Rob to a climax if he was 'brave'. "Rob, I have something to tell you. You know that I have been going somewhat further than what you are used to. I have spoken a lot with Marion and she told me that you have been into subspace before. I am hoping this afternoon to get that result again. I have been allowed by Helena to let you come, to give you a climax, or more than one, if you behave. But only if I decide you deserve a climax. I can feel you are aroused already." She walked around him and his eyes followed her. He could only look a bit forward, but not upwards, so he couldn't see the expression on her face. Maybe that was better, because Michelle had a cruel expression on her face now, she could finally do what she was the best at: bringing pain without traces afterwards. Of course, maybe tomorrow he would have some bruises, but they would be gone very soon. But she would still give him hell on earth, which he didn't know. "Be brave, please don't use your safe word unless you really can't take anymore. When you have endured my test without making use of your safe word, then I will give you your well deserved climax, but only then. Should you otherwise have problems, like a cramp, use 'white' instead of 'black'. Using your safe word will be the end of the test. Understood? And do we have a deal?" "Yes." "Yes?" "Yes - Mistress." "Thank you. Please give me the regard I deserve. Remember you are a guest in my dungeon." She was truly not amused,because Rob still resisted her. Maybe, when this session was past them, he would behave; or he would flee. She had to be careful, damnit. Some men, and always the ones she liked, were hard to convince. "I will now start." She took a small paddle from the trolley and used it on his buttocks. At first she didn't use much force, but when his arse began to glow again and she caressed it, and felt the skin getting rougher, she used more force. Rob didn't respond very much to the first strikes, but when she used more force, he began to moan. The blows she dealt were given with care, she wanted to hit all the flesh on his arse, and the area below, in between the thigh and buttock, where it really hurt. His thighs were not spared as well, luckily for him his legs were bound together, and she couldn't reach his inner thighs, but she knew that wasn't necessary. He would still get his surprise. Rob felt the blows fall one after another. He lost count and just surrendered. They hurt, but not as badly as he had expected. He knew Michelle was famous for her technique, and he knew this was just a start. Finally Michelle stopped. She stood in front of Rob and said: "So far you're doing great. I bet you have done this often with Marion." "Yes Mistress," he answered timidly. "I have built up the heat in your buttocks. Prepare to receive the worst you have undergone in your experiences with BDSM. I will use a very simple whip, but it is easy to underestimate it. In old times they used it sometimes on children but I can assure you that there is nothing childish about it. You may cry, in fact you probably will. Be brave. You will receive 15 lashes. Thereafter I will untie you. I promise I will take care of you. I will beat your behind, and tonight we will shower together if you are up to it. But only if you don't safe word. Understood?" "Yes, Mistress." Michelle fetched a bucket of water with a rod made of a birch branch in it. She showed it to Rob. "It is wet, so it won't break easily." It looked harmless, almost, but Rob saw the buds and twigs, and suddenly he realized that this instrument was fearsome. "You count. I will have a slight pause after each stroke. Fifteen strokes, Rob. Are you ready?" "I'm not sure." "Start counting!" She was annoyed again by his lack of respect. "One," he said softly. "Speak louder, I want to hear you!" "One!" Rob heard a swishing sound and then the first stroke landed on his buttocks. He hardly felt it, his arse was still a bit insensitive from the beating with her hands and the following beating with the paddle. "Two!" Again the swishing sound, and this time he felt something, but nothing to worry about. "Three!" Again the swishing sound and then it landed on his arse, this time he felt little tickles, as if his nerves were stimulated. He hesitated. Michelle waited and finally she ordered "Go on!" "Four!" Swish, crack and this time he felt as if his behind had been touched by thousands of needles. Again he hesitated and finally: "Five!" Swish and then pain. He didn't foresee this, this hurting. It was as if his arse was on fire. "Six." Why did she wait? Then, swish and pain. It hurt like hell. He realized, the pain was building up. Each stroke was worse than the one before. "Seven." Fearfully he awaited the next blow. Michelle took her time, then, swish, and his world then consisted only of pain. Tears came into his eyes. It was as if knives were cutting his buttocks. How much longer could he endure this? "Carry on!" she ordered impatiently. "Eight," he said, with a trembling voice. Swish, and he had to bite his teeth, otherwise he would have screamed. This one was more painful than he expected. Seven more strokes to go, and each one more severe? "Nine," he said softly. A pause, a few terrible seconds; and then again swish. He was fighting for air, his world was red and he wriggled and shouted "Stop, you have to use less strength. It's too painful." "Six more to go, be strong. Continue!" With a broken voice he said "Ten." This time the pain didn't stop, he wriggled his arse in vain and screamed. Tears flowed from his eyes. "Please stop!" It hurt far more than anything else that he had ever endured before. "Again!" "Eleven..." The swish he feared, then the slash on his arse and then his world was pain. Only pain, the world faded, became black and he fainted. "Are you there? Rob, look at me!" He opened his eyes, didn't know for a moment where he was, then felt his buttocks burn and said "Black!" But she already had him untied. "You were so close," she sighed. "Let me take care of you." "No thank you. You have done more than enough." Very stiffly he stood up, almost collapsing. Michelle had expected this and supported him. With a growl Rob tore himself away from her. "I'll manage," he said with an angry voice. He stumbled to the clothing room, and examined his behind. A whole lot of scratches, but no real cuts, but he saw that the upper skin was damaged and although no blood drops were visible, he knew it would only take another stroke and he would have bled. He went out and entered the shower room. A first-aid cabinet hung on the wall, and he opened it. Inside he found the normal wound treatments, but also some oils and salves. He decided to take a hot shower first and after the shower treat his behind. He didn't start with hot water, he knew it would be agony and at first he used just lukewarm water. When he got used to it, after spending some ten minutes under the stream and trying to ease the pain from his hurt buttocks and then finally, when his arse didn't burn so much anymore, he used warmer water. When he got out, he almost spent some twenty minutes in the shower, also letting the water flow over his face. He didn't want to show Michelle that he had actually cried from the pain that she gave him. Then he used some oil to relax his buttocks and carefully lied down on a bench while waiting for the oil to do its work. When it was incorporated into his sore flesh, he applied some more and he started to massage his behind, which felt good and bad, too. Finally he stood up and put on his clothes. He was glad he was wearing satin panties, the smoothness of the material was much better than his cotton male underpants. Thereafter he put on the rest of his male clothes. When he stepped out of the shower room, Michelle stood waiting for him. "Finally. I hope you are feeling better?" "Yes, but no thanks to you," Rob said with a very hostile voice. "I'm out of this silly game. I get nothing out of it, only hurt, it doesn't do anything for me, and if this is to be my future with Helena and Marion, I will seriously reconsider it!" Michelle was shaken by his words, and her face went pale. "Rob, that was not the intention." "Hah. Not the intention? Seriously? I think you wanted to break me, so I would finally fall for your games. Sorry, that is not going to happen. You have stepped over a boundary, that I never intended to take. I was out for a few moments, and you just said that it was a pity I fainted, then 'You were so close'. What were you thinking? Did you even care that I had fainted?" "I'm sorry. I thought you could handle it. You are not the first one, you know. I have done this to others, and they endured the fifteen strokes." "Whatever. I didn't. And what now?" "It's perfectly clear that I crossed a boundary. Nothing else will happen. I have one more request. Please stay here, tomorrow it will be an easy day. I had planned a session with somebody else and the only thing you have to do is to be present." "I will think about it. If you don't mind, I will leave. If and at what time I'll be back depends completely on my mood. For now I have seen enough of you." Again he offended her, on purpose, but this time Michelle could understand his anger. In fact she was mad at herself as well. She wanted him to reach that special place, but he had resisted, and he ended up only being hurt. She should have stopped by herself, and not by him fainting. She had went too far, she knew it. Helena would be very pissed off, and she probably had lost Rob's friendship as well. The way he treated her was not of a dear friend anymore, in fact he was very hostile. She had tears in her eyes. Rob saw the emotions on her face while she swallowed his words. But he had no pity for her when she showed tears. He turned, walked up the stairs, grabbed his coat and went outside. "Where are you going?" Michelle shouted after him. He just shrugged his shoulders. He needed fresh air, to see other people and to know there were other things than these kooky women. He walked a couple of blocks, until he reached a road with shops and restaurants. He saw an inviting looking pub and headed for it. He decided to get drunk and ordered a few large whiskeys. When he had four in a row, he decided he had had enough. Not enough to be drunk, but the amount was sufficient to feel a lot better and he staggered off, back to Michelle's place. At arrival he rang the bell and Michelle opened the gate and stood waiting for him at her front door. This time she was normally clothed, no more provocative dresses, but just a sweater and jeans. "I didn't expect you back, I thought you had run off." "I did run off. I needed a stiff drink and I had a couple." Michelle could smell it. "Was that necessary? You could get them from me as well." "I had to go out." "I see. You didn't want to be near me anymore." "Exactly!" He wasn't going to deny it. "The only reason I'm back is because I want to fulfill my promise, to stay these days at your place and to 'learn'. So far I didn't learn a thing, did I?" He was talking with a drunken voice, but Michelle knew he was right. "No, except maybe for some anger management. I recall a few cases where you would hide in your bunker when something bad happened," she said, unintentionally hurting him with her remark. "I remember a woman who was crying, because she was treated so badly," he parried. "OK, you made your point. Peace?" "Truce, I cannot forgive you yet for what you did." "Do you still want to have dinner with me?" "The dinner that I made?" "No, let's go out. I'll drive us to a cozy restaurant, on neutral ground. Is that good enough for you?" Rob didn't hesitate long. "Yes, I would like that." He was still a bit stiff from the beating and hadn't sat comfortably during the evening. The booze in the pub had numbed the pain a bit, but now that he sobered up, it hurt again. Later, at Michelle's place after they had had their dinner at a restaurant, he gave up his resistance. She applied oil and massaged his hurting buttocks. After that, he went to sleep, in her bedroom. Michelle crawled against him, spooning her body against his. Michelle didn't sleep very much that night. She still thought about the things that had gotten out of hand. Finally, early in the morning, she fell asleep as well. All becomes clear Michelle and Rob sat together, sipping their coffee. Michelle had made them a breakfast consisting of strong coffee and some hot breakfast sandwiches. While Rob thought he wasn't very hungry, and his behind still was hurting, the moment he smelled the bacon and cheese, he gratefully accepted the plate she offered him. "I was planning to confront you with one of my subs, but he called in sick this morning," Michelle said. It was true, Rob had heard her phone ringing, wondering who that was so very early. "I hope you were not planning to let him near me?" He asked suspiciously. "No, of course not! My sole purpose is and was to let you become more familiar with being in the presence of other people, of other men to be precise, when doing a scene. There are lots of people like yourself in the scene. Men who like to dress up, to fulfill tasks as a serving 'girl', or just walk in nice dresses or whatever they feel relaxed in. It's not all S&M stuff. There is a whole world full of people who act differently, and are seeking a place to enjoy themselves amongst like-minded friends. I have been thinking, since my original plan can't be done today, we can perhaps do something else."