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Kasey's Confession Ch. 01

By: KaseyLegs



My name is Kasey. This is the true story of my journey into a life of dressing as a woman, role-playing with men and eventually spending over a decade being sexually submissive to men and being passed around freely between them.

My journey began nearly twenty years ago and started at a different place than most crossdressers. I was obsessed with women's legs to the point where it became a fetish. One day a woman I was seeing, upon hearing me complain about her legs having stubble on them, told me I should try shaving my own legs if I thought it was so easy to keep them smooth all the time.

So I started shaving my legs. At first I just wanted to prove to her that I could do it, but I was amazed at how good my own legs looked after being shaved. When she dared me to keep shaving, she told me, "Just doing it once doesn't prove anything; keeping them that way is the hard part."

So, I kept shaving, and the more I did the more I wanted them to look good. I started shaving up to my waist and modeling for myself in front of the mirror. I bought a pair of short shorts and started showing off. Eventually I wanted to show my legs off in public and felt having a girlfriend would keep people from getting "the wrong idea" about me.

Eventually my girlfriend threw in the towel on me. She said she'd created a monster and couldn't deal with my obsession with showing off. Her departure started a period in my life where I became very nervous about going out in my shorts, but at the same time my desire to do so became greater.

Whenever I was out at the supermarket or gas station or just about anywhere I went in my short shorts I would notice men checking out my legs. Sometimes they looked confused or annoyed when they saw I was a guy, but every once and a while there would be a man who smiled or winked at me.

I was loathe to admit it, but I'd feel butterflies every time a man would check out my legs and smile or wink or otherwise indicate that he liked what he saw. Then one day I was in the supermarket in my newest shorts, a white pair so short I worried my balls might pop out the side if I turned too quickly. I noticed a man looking at my legs and following me around the store. At one point I glanced over and down at his crotch.

He had a huge bulge in his pants. My heart fluttered and a giggle burst out of me.

I rushed to get out of the store, feeling suddenly awkward and confused. The rush I got from having men check out my legs got so much more intense when I realized this man who was following me around had a raging hard-on.

I kept telling myself it was an anomaly. I was completely straight and of course I liked that I turned this man on. What did I expect from wanting men to appreciate my legs? Did I think they would write poetry about them? 

At that point I started fantasizing all the time about men, about being dressed up like a woman in very sexy clothes that showed off my legs, and about being made to service the erections I gave them. I started shopping for high heeled shoes, short skirts, thigh high stockings and began posing in front of the mirror and liking what I saw.

The fantasies became more intense over time and as I started doing things like painting my toenails and wearing lace or thong panties all the time, even under my pants at work. My public appearances were more daring as well. I started tanning my legs, wearing shorts that could not be passed off as men's shorts or unisex, and would actually try, once or twice, walking around in short shorts with lace-topped ankle socks and women's sneakers.

I started meeting men online, at first just to talk and then to meet so I could show off my legs to guys who were interested in seeing them. I would meet them in parking lots at first, but it felt goofy and uncomfortable and so I started setting up to meet them casually at a bar near where I lived. It was a place where people stopped for a drink on the way home or met with friends for a few rounds. It had a laid back feel and the bartender I usually saw there, a young woman named Jen, was very friendly and always seemed glad to see me.

I got comfortable meeting men at the bar, and as I did my fantasies became more intense and outrageous. I started going out to men's cars with them and letting them touch and fondle my legs. Then I met a man who told me he really wanted to jerk off on my legs.

At first I said nothing. I was surprised by the request and the way in which he casually brought it up. I measured my insistence that I was completely straight and just wanted men to admire my legs against the intense sexual fantasies I was constantly having involving men. I decided it was not going to interfere with my "straight guy with great legs" persona and would be an even better way of showing off and having my legs appreciated.

It was awkward in the front seat of my new friend's car. He was trying to feel my thighs with his left hand while jerking off with his right. When he pulled out his hard cock, it was of very average size, maybe a bit smaller than most, he was furiously trying to get off.

"Look," I said, "I live just around the corner. Why don't we do this at my place?"

It was the first time I brought a man back to my apartment for any reason relating to my legs or my crossdressing. Alan was a very non-threatening kind of guy and he was incredibly turned on by my legs and how freely I let him run his hands all over them. The least I could do was make it comfortable for him to get off on them.

The first thing Alan asked after we were in my apartment was if I'd put on a pair of high heels for him. We'd talked about the outfits I wore at home online, and now that we were back at my place and safe from prying eyes, it seemed a logical step.

I brought out one of the two pairs of heels I had at that time and sat down at the kitchen table next to Alan. As I started to take off my sneakers, he excitedly grabbed my leg and pulled it up on his lap.

"Let me do it," he said, breathing very fast and deep. He untied my left sneaker and quickly yanked it off, throwing it absently across the room before pulling off my sock and dropping it on the floor.

One of the things that always bothered me most when I dressed was my large feet, which required a size twelve in women's shoes. I was self-conscious of this whenever I wore heels and had not yet worn them in front of a man.

"I love your toenail polish," Alan said as he continued breathing heavy while pulling my foot up to his face for a closer look. "You have very beautiful feet."

Those words gave me butterflies and I smiled. My own erection was straining against the material of my shorts and I popped it out the bottom of the leg of my shorts where I started absently stroking it while Alan kissed my feet and along my leg while furiously jerking his own cock.

It wasn't long before his body jerked back and he yelled out "You bitch!" while his semen shot out of his cock. Most of his load landed on my legs but one stray stream caught me across the cheek and landed in my hair.

Once Alan caught his breath, he quickly gathered up his clothes, pulled his pants back on and slipped into his shoes. He muttered and quick thanks and headed out the door without saying another word.

Sitting there, still hard as a rock, I looked at my cum-covered leg and started jerking off while kissing and licking my own legs. When my tongue wandered over to where Alan's cum was dripping I paused for a moment and lapped at it. When I realized how good it tasted I began jerking myself off relentlessly as I devoured the present Alan had left me with.

After I finally came, all I could think about was feeling disgusted about having eaten another man's semen and how weird it felt to have him jerking off on my legs.

Even though it had been an incredible experience, I felt sick afterwards. I stood in the bathroom looking at myself in my tight little shorts. What was I doing?

I stepped back, wrestling with the conflicting thoughts and emotions running through my head, and one single thought came blasting to the surface.

"A man got off while kissing my beautiful legs."

With that thought I fought off my misgivings and fears and told myself I didn't need to stop showing off my legs. I didn't need to stop meeting men. 

I wanted to meet more men. I wanted to show off my legs more often. I NEEDED the attention and the reinforcement of my belief that I had gorgeous female legs.

Instead of backing away I started going out to places like the supermarket and gas station all the time with my short shorts on. I would get some stares, the occasional nasty hateful remark, and sometimes the long lusty looks that gave me butterflies.

Although I never wore anything other than a t-shirt, shorts and sneakers to the bar, and I never hooked up directly with any of the guys I met there, the frequency of my meetings would attract the interest of Jen, the bartender who usually worked during the afternoons I met men there. One afternoon when my "date" didn't bother to show up on time, I found myself sitting at the bar talking to Jen while I waited.

At one point she leaned across the bar and whispered, "I bet you give GREAT head."

"What?" I was caught completely off-guard.

"Oh come on, all those guys you meet here?"

"You've really got me figured all wrong," I told her. "Those are just guys I work with. Sometimes we meet up for a beer."

"Whatever," she said and slid me another beer. "That one's on me. I didn't mean to offend you."

"Thanks," I said sheepishly. "You didn't offend me, it's just that, you know..."

"Sweetie," she said while gently placing her hand on mine, "you come in here three or four times a week and always meet a different guy. I can tell you've never met before. They stare at those legs of yours and you stare at the bulge in their pants. It doesn't take a rocket scientist, you know?"

I looked down silently at my beer, glad that the bar was empty except for Jen and me. Then the guy I was meeting walked in.

"Kasey?"

Mike was different than the other men I had met. On the whole, most of the guys I met were timid and let me direct the conversation. Mike was a more dominant personality and I knew that before I agreed to meet him. 

"Hi," I said as I turned to him while trying to keep an eye on Jen. "You must be Mike."

"Yeah," he said and sat down on the stool next to me.

"I thought we could get a table near the back—"

"This is fine," he said. "Sit with your legs crossed like a good girl."

Jen heard everything, and came over with a big smile. "What can I get you to drink, Mike?"

I had crossed my legs and looked away as Mike ordered a beer and told Jen to bring a shot of tequila for me. I kept looking away from Jen while trying not to ignore Mike, cringing at the idea of them talking.

"Where do you and Kasey know each other from?" Jen asked Mike.

"From online," Mike said.

"One of those dating sites?" Jen asked, causing me to visibly cringe.

Mike took his beer in hand and put the shot of tequila in mine. "Not exactly," Mike told her.

I drained the tequila shot and got up from the bar. "I have to go," I told Jen. "How much do I owe you?"

"I've got it," Mike told me.

"Thanks," I muttered and rushed out of the bar. I had just gotten to my car when I heard Mike's voice from behind me.

"Do you always rush off like this?" he asked. "You are a terrible tease."

"I don't know what I'm doing," I told him as I opened my car door. "I'm sorry."

"Relax," he told me. "You are very confused right now because you want something your brain keeps telling you is wrong. And you don't know whether you can do it or not and you're scared."

"I don't want to do anything. I just want to go home."

"You want to start sucking cock."

"Oh gosh, no," I said and made a face. "I'm sorry if you thought—"

"You told me online you fantasize about it all the time."

"Yeah, sure, but that is just fantasy."

"And you go out all the time in those tight little shorts meeting men. You fantasize constantly about being on your knees sucking cock. You are a very confused wannabe sissy."

"I'm sorry, I don't know, I just—"

"Why don't you go back to your apartment and get all dressed up in one of those miniskirts and some high heels like you talked about online. I will call you in an hour. If you want me to come over and teach you how to suck cock, just answer and let me know your address and I'll be over. If not, don't answer the phone and I won't bother you ever again."

"I'm really sorry, I think I gave you the wrong idea."

"No problem. You just go on home and decide what you want. If I come over, I WILL make you suck my cock and you WILL love it. Otherwise, you can keep fooling around playing games with men, but after a while they'll start getting real bored with you."

I jumped into my car and drove home.

At first I was determined to put an immediate end to what I had started calling my "hobby." Things had gotten out of hand, I told myself. All I wanted was to show off my legs and have men appreciate them. I wasn't about to start sucking cock, even though I fantasized about it constantly. I was just going to stop and go back to being "normal." 

Then I opened my closet and looked at the pair of high heels I had recently purchased, six-inch platforms, and the miniskirts and panties I had been collecting. I had tears in my eyes as I pulled my girl clothes out of the closet and started trying on different combinations. By the time I found a combination of clothes that made me look like a sexy stripper, my phone was ringing.

I paused, staring at the phone as it rang. I knew the answering machine would pick up after four rings, so as the third ring came and went I made a decision and picked up the phone.

"Hello?" I asked in a feminine voice.

"Is this Kasey?"

"Yes." I could hear my heart pounding.

"This is Mike. Give me your address."

I paused, struggling to speak, my heart pounding louder and my hands shaking as I looked down at myself in a miniskirt, high heels and pink ankle socks with lace tops.

"Don't be afraid, Kasey," Mike said. "You want to suck cock, don't you?"

"Yes," I sighed after another pause.

"Give me your address."

I gave it to him, stuttering and crying as I did. After I hung up, I found myself curled up in a ball on the floor hugging my knees and rocking myself. There was no turning back. Mike was going to come over and I was going to become a cocksucker.

When the doorbell rang I struggled to get to my feet. Standing up in six-inch platform heels wasn't easy, given the fact that I was shaking and both nervous and excited at the same time. I tried to walk gracefully to the front door of my studio apartment, stumbling several times, but finally able to reach the door. I opened it slowly, and once I saw Mike standing there and smiling, I quickly opened it the rest of the way and welcomed him into my home.

"I know it is a difficult step," Mike said as he looked at my tear-stained face. "It isn't easy for someone who has been pretending to be a man for so long to accept that what he really wants is to be on his knees in front of men being submissive to their needs."

Mike took my right hand and placed it on his crotch. As I felt his bulge I shuddered, "Oh my goodness, you are so... hard."

He opened his pants and his fly enough to push his hard cock out and then put my hand on it. My eyes shot open wide and I couldn't help but smile.

As I stroked it gently with my fingertips I giggled. "I want to suck it," I confessed.

"You want to suck what?"

"I want to suck your cock," I replied quietly.

"I can't hear you. What do you want, sissy?"

Looking down at his hard, nine inch thick cock, unable to take my eyes off it and unable to stop thinking it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen, I loudly said, "I want to suck your cock!"

I found myself dropping to my knees without any coaxing, wanting to see his big hard cock closer, wanting to know what it would taste like and how it would feel sliding into my mouth. I kept stroking it, leaning in closer to smell him, and looking up hoping he approved. I leaned even closer after seeing him smiling down at me, and lightly kissed the head of his cock.

The first kiss felt so good I kissed it again and again. My kisses became more frequent, more passionate and I couldn't stop. Soon I was sliding the head of his cock into my mouth and licking it up and down the shaft while gasping and moaning.

"That's it, baby," Mike said, "let it all out. You've needed this for so long."

I was sliding more of his cock in and out of my mouth, then letting it slide out while kissing and licking his cock up and down to the balls, where I suddenly found myself burying my face while kissing them. Then I kissed my way up to the head of his cock and once again slid the head in past my lips and started sucking him the way I'd seen so many women do in porno movies.

I was so happy when he finally moaned, so glad I had given him pleasure, and he grabbed my hair and pulled my head away from him.

"I have got to sit down," he said, gasping. "You are one HUNGRY bitch."

I was eager to continue, but Mike told me to bring him a beer. Then he looked at the big mirror that sat on top of my dresser and asked if it came off.

"It was part of the dresser, but the back broke when I moved so it just kind of sits there." It was a big, full length mirror I had often taken down off the dresser to admire my legs when I dressed up by myself. Once Mike saw that it came down, he assisted me in taking it down and resting it against the wall alongside the chair he decided to sit on.

"I want you to watch yourself give me head," he said once he sat back down.

I looked over at myself in the mirror, standing in front of a man in heels and a miniskirt, my legs looking more beautiful than they ever had before even though my knees were shaking and I was very unsteady in my heels. It felt natural, and right, as I got back down on my knees in front of Mike.

He removed his shoes and his pants. Once I took his hard cock in my hand he told me to look in the mirror. I turned my head to see my tear-stained face just above Mike's cock, which my hand was gently stroking.

Through the tears was a look of happiness. My eyes were bright and I was smiling, but I had never seen myself looking so full of joy.

"Now you finally know what you are," Mike said. I slid my mouth back over the head of his cock as he told me, "Kasey, you are a natural born cocksucker."

I stopped for a moment, taking in the sledgehammer of the words Mike had just hit me with. I closed my eyes and thought about how many nights I had fantasized about this. I opened them again and looked at the mirror, my beautiful legs on display in a short skirt and high heels. My back was arched and my ass was in the air as I watched myself slowly descend back down the full length of his cock until it hit the back of my throat.

I gagged and pulled back slightly, then realized I was drooling all over his cock and balls. "Keep it nice and lubricated, sissy, it will slide up and down so much easier."

I nodded and kept sucking, sliding my mouth up and down the shaft of his cock, which seemed even harder now than it had before. I paused to run my tongue around the head of his cock, lavish his balls with my tongue and plant kisses all along the length of his gorgeous cock.

"I wish I had gotten prettier for you," I said, looking in the mirror and wishing I had a more girlish top and that I was wearing makeup and had long girlish hair.

"You can do that tomorrow," he said as he moaned and grabbed his cock with his right hand while pushing my head down on it with his left. 

I felt a sense of panic as he tensed up, my head pulled down on his cock as he jerked it and then released his cock and pulled my head down hard on it. "Oh hell yeah!" he exclaimed as he came hard into my throat.


Kasey's Confession Ch. 01



I gagged and struggled, panicking at how to deal with this, but he held my head down on him and I choked and gasped while Mike's semen flooded out the corners of my mouth.

"You'll get better with practice," he told me as he pulled his cock out of my mouth and wiped it on my face, "and you won't make such a mess."

"Yes, sir," I gurgled as I tried to choke down the cum lingering in my mouth.

"I don't think you'll have any trouble finding men to practice on," Mike laughed. "Once word gets out that you're no longer a tease who waves his girlie legs in men's faces and runs away, well, I think there is going to be a line at your door."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 02



After Mike left, I stood in front of my big mirror and stared at myself. I kept thinking of all the excuses I had given myself, and other people, about why I shaved my legs and liked wearing short shorts, skirts, high heels and stockings.

All that had changed in a single afternoon, although the writing had been on the wall for a long time. Even before I had let Alan jerk off on my legs I had been fantasizing and masturbating while imagining men dominating me and making me satisfy them sexually. I'd always told myself it was only fantasy and it wasn't really what I wanted.

Looking at myself in the mirror, the same mirror I had admired myself in while going down on Mike, and seeing his cum drying on my face it was impossible for me to deny the truth.

I had sucked cock and I had absolutely loved it.

When I finally got around to going into the bathroom to wash my face, the first thing that hit me was my lack of makeup. I wanted to look pretty for Mike, or for any man interested in me, and not just be a guy with great legs in a skirt and heels. I wanted to do my hair up like a woman. I wanted to wear earrings.

I had a lot of trouble sleeping that night. So many fantasies involving men were running rampant through my imagination. The fantasies were so intense that I had to get myself off three times during the night.

When my alarm clock went off to wake me up for work I was barely able to manage consciousness. After a shower and a cup of coffee I started getting dressed in my boring guy clothes for work. 

The phone rang. It was Mike.

"Good morning, cocksucker."

"Good morning, sir."

"I'm going to come over around seven o'clock tonight," he told me. "I'm going to introduce you to a friend of mine."

After I took a moment to collect myself, I told him, "Okay."

"Get all pretty for him," Mike said. "Make me proud."

Mike saying that didn't feel as weird as my reaction to his words did. I felt both flattered and excited. The idea of a man thinking of me as being pretty, or at least capable of becoming pretty, made me feel good. I didn't flinch at all at the thought of meeting another man. I loved showing off and dressing up for men.

And if there was one thing I'd come to realize after going down on Mike, it was that I wanted to suck cock. I wanted to suck a lot of cock. 

I was distracted all day at work. Sitting there at my desk, dressed in my regular guy clothes, I daydreamed about coming to work dressed in my girl clothes. I knew it would shock most of the people I worked with and that some would be hateful and disgusted if they knew about my encounters with men. 

When I got home I took out the makeup I had bought to experiment over the years. I took a shower and shaved my entire body so I was smooth and clean all over. I put on fake fingernails and painted them pink to match my toes. I had one bra, which I put balled up socks in and put on. It was far from a perfect semblance of real breasts, but it was as close as I could get with what I knew and had to work with. I put on my shortest miniskirt, thigh-high fishnet stockings, my platform heels, then pulled a pink t-shirt over my pretend breasts. 

I spent more than two hours trying to get my makeup to look fairly decent and made a mental note to see if I could get some sort of instructional video online before my next "date."

I already had long hair, so I used a lot of hairspray and mousse while blow-drying it to the best semblance of a woman's hairstyle I could.

After I finally felt ready to meet Mike and his friend, I barely was able to sit down for ten minutes before the doorbell rang.

I took a deep breath, exhaled, looked at myself one more time in my full length mirror and strutted to the door in my heels.

Normally, I looked through the peep hole to see who was at the door before opening it, but under the circumstances I wasn't thinking. I assumed it would be Mike and his friend, but hadn't even realized it was barely past six o'clock and they weren't due until seven.

I pulled open the door, expected to see Mike standing there and then froze in shock when I saw it wasn't him. It was Bill, my next door neighbor.

"Uh," he mumbled, shocked to see me dressed the way I was. "Yeah, um, you left your keys in your door."

He was holding out my keychain with all my keys dangling from it. In my rush to get inside and get ready for Mike and his friend, I had forgotten to take the keys out of the lock after I opened my apartment door to go inside.

"Oh, uh, thanks," I stammered and took the keys from him. "Yeah," I added, looking down at myself, "this is a long story having to do with a... um, dare... my girlfriend... yeah, long story."

"Hey, whatever floats your boat, man."

"Thanks again," I mumbled and closed the door.

Once inside, I breathed a long sigh of relief and got myself a beer. Once I recovered from my feelings of humiliation, I found myself thinking about how Bill was a really cute guy and wondering if he'd ever let me go down on him.

I finished four beers while pacing in nervous anticipation of the arrival of Mike and his friend. When they did arrive, just ten minutes past seven, I made sure to look through the peep hole in my door before opening it.

"Hi," I breathed out in my best effort at a feminine voice.

"Holy shit, Mike," blurted out Mike's friend, "you weren't kidding me."

"Are you going to let us in?" Mike asked as I stood there stunned.

"Yes, sir," I said. "Come on in."

"This is J.J.," Mike said as they came into my apartment.

"Hi, J.J.," I said. "Nice to meet you."

"You have got some amazing legs, Kasey," J.J. said as he looked me up and down. 

"Thank you," I giggled.

"Get us a couple of beers," Mike said before they sat down on my couch.

"Yes sir."

When I handed them the beers, J.J. was licking his lips and continuing to look me over, his eyes lingering over my thighs where they were bare between the tops of my stockings and the bottom of my skirt. I smiled at him.

"I like to watch, Kasey," Mike told me. "Once I get first dibs, I like to watch my projects develop into submissive sissy cocksuckers."

I said nothing, and instead stared as J.J. pulled off his shirt, revealed the well-muscled body of someone who worked out very regularly. He continued to strip off the rest of his clothes until he stood before me completely naked, displaying his chiseled physique, which almost resembled that of a professional bodybuilder.

"Oh my gosh," I breathed out as I looked down at his huge cock, which was hard as a rock with a pair of gigantic balls hanging below.

"I think she likes you," Mike told J.J. with a laugh.

I stood there staring at J.J.'s cock and his body and found myself wanting him, but at the same time my mind started fighting my desires. I started crying as I dropped down on my knees in front of him and reached out to feel his massive erection with my hands.

"Still hasn't been completely tamed yet," Mike told J.J.

"That's when they're the most fun," laughed J.J. while I stroked his cock and looked up at him with a smile on my face and tears running down my cheeks. 

He brushed my hair away from my face and told me, "You're already a cocksucker, why keep fighting it?"

Physically, I could not resist, but my mind and emotions kept telling me to stop, that this wasn't who I was, that I liked women, and that this was a game that had gone too far. My thoughts could not win against my compulsion and desire. I wanted that cock in my mouth.

My body quivered, my eyes leaked tears, but my head leaned forward and I kissed the tip of J.J.'s cock before sliding the full head of it in my mouth.

I sucked back and forth on the head of J.J.'s cock several times before he pulled it back and away from me. I made the most pathetic, weak, whining sound as he did, shocked and surprised and hoping I hadn't done something wrong.

"BEG FOR IT."

I stared at him, my lip quivering, trying to say something but unable to speak.

"BEG FOR IT or I will get dressed and walk out on your sissy ass right now," J.J. said.

I thought about all the fantasies I'd been having for years, imagining myself in situations much like this one, as well as the more outrageous fantasies where I went down on groups of men or sucked cock in parking lots and public men's rooms. I looked up at J.J. with my lips quivering and tried to say the words.

"Please," I said. "Please let me suck your cock."

"BEG."

"P-p-p-please..."

J.J. grabbed the back of my head and pulled it closer so that his balls and the base of his cock were just a couple inches away from my mouth. I was panting and shaking.

"You want to lick my balls, faggot?"

"Yes sir. Very much, sir. I do."

"Then why is your tongue still in your mouth, crybaby?"

My tongue instantly shot out and began licking his balls, running up and down the meaty sack and over each of his juicy balls. As I continued to enjoy licking them, I found myself unable to stop moaning and gasping out an almost constant "Mmmm."

My lips slid over one of J.J.'s balls and I drew it into my mouth. I looked up at J.J. and instinctively reached up to take his cock in my right hand. I slowly stroked it as I gently sucked on his testicle, looking up for approval.

He was smiling, so I let his first ball slip out of my mouth and slid my mouth over the second one and gently worked it the way I had the first, lightly sucking on it while tasting it with my tongue inside my mouth.

"Fuck yeah," he moaned.

I looked over at Mike, who had taken off his pants and was stroking himself while watching me. Then I let J.J.'s swollen nut slip out of my mouth and told him, "I need your beautiful cock in my mouth."

"Suck it," he told me.

I pulled it down towards me and ran my tongue over the length of it, down and then up, and drew the head slowly into my mouth. My own dick was so hard it strained against my thong panties and eventually popped itself free and rubbed against the fabric of my tight little skirt.

Mike got up and walked over to me. Standing there, he took my free hand and placed it on his cock. My body shuddered and seized for a moment, almost as if I were having an orgasm, and I began stroking Mike while continuing to suck J.J.'s cock.

"Gosh this is so awesome," I blurted out as I let J.J.'s cock slip out of my mouth for a moment. I kept stroking it with my hand as I looked at Mike and asked, "Should I suck your cock too, sir?"

Mike smile exploded across his face. "You should go back and forth sucking both our cocks," he said.

I immediately turned and lowered my head towards his cock.

"Every time you switch from one to the other, I want you to yell out loudly that you love sucking cock."

My lips parted and I took the head of Mike's cock into my mouth. I sucked on it for a few seconds and then slid down on him until his cock hit the back of my throat and made me gag.

When I pulled back to catch my breath, Mike sighed a sigh of disappointment. "You have GOT to start getting better at that."

"I'm trying, sir," I said and slid my lips back over his cock. I took it down as far as I could again, trying very hard not to gag so hard I had to pull back to catch my breath again. I managed to gag only slightly and was able to continue.

"Back over here, sissy," I heard J.J. say.

I sucked up and down on Mike's cock a few more times before letting him go and turning back to J.J.

Mike grabbed my hair and turned me back towards him and tilted my head back so I was looking directly up at him. "What do you say when you switch between us?"

"I love sucking cock," I whimpered.

"Say it LOUD and PROUD, sissy boy."

"I love sucking cock," I said.

"Like you mean it, bitch. Loud!"

"I LOVE SUCKING COCK!" I yelled.

"That's what I'm talking about," he laughed. "Go suck J.J. some more."

They would keep me going, back and forth, for the next half hour. I'd only spent a couple of minutes on each of their cocks before the other called me back to work on them. At first I could not believe I was really doing this, but I was so hard and my dick kept rubbing against my skirt and driving me crazy, making me so horny I could barely concentrate on anything other than how badly I wanted to get both of these guys off with my mouth.

My knees hurt and my mouth felt numb after the first half hour, and when that turned into an hour my legs were sore and my knees were badly rug-burned. Then Mike stopped calling me back to him, leaving me to work solely on his friend. I had gotten to really love how every time I switched back from one cock to the other they had slightly softened without my attention and then turned rock hard after I resumed sucking on them, but now I just really needed to get them both off.

I was furiously sucking back and forth on the head of J.J.'s cock, knowing how that had always been the key to my getting off when a former girlfriend had given me head, when J.J.'s body stiffened and he pulled my head down on his cock.

He pulled me down so hard that his enormous cock pushed into my throat so fast and forcefully that I could barely react. My head was almost upside down and I was fighting to breathe, when J.J. grunted loudly and his cock exploded, shooting a tremendous amount of semen straight into my throat.

When he let go of my head, I started coughed and gasping desperately for air, ripping my head off of him and falling backwards. Being on my knees, I ended up falling sideways as I coughed up J.J.'s cum to keep from choking on it.

Mike stood up, asked me if I was okay, and after I nodded with fresh tears in my eyes he helped me get up on my feet. He remained naked from the waist down, with his cock mostly still hard. J.J. was lying back on the couch looking pleased.

"I don't want to disappoint you," I sobbed, reaching down and stroking Mike's cock. 

"You have the desire and the hunger," Mike said as I continued stroking him while standing in front of him, "all you need is a lot more practice."

"I know," I said quietly and looked down at his now completely hard cock. "I've dreamed about this for so long," I said. "Being dressed all sexy and sucking off two men in the same night..."

"Get down there and finish me off, then," Mike told me.

I crouched down and found it too uncomfortable, so went back down on my red, rug-burned knees. I slowly brought his cock to my lips and kissed the head of it passionately before swallowing it almost to the base. I drew back, all without gagging, and then kissed the tip.

"Much better," Mike said with a smile.

"I want to be a great cocksucker," I told him before sliding my lips back over the head of his cock and sucking him hard and fast, then slowing down and working the underside of his cock head with my tongue. "I want to walk down the street and have men say, there goes a hot pair of cocksucker legs."

My talk seemed to excite Mike even more, so I went down on him again and stroked him as I sucked. His legs got shaky for several seconds before his knees locked and he moaned loudly, blasting a loud of cum directly into my mouth.

I held onto most of it, but couldn't stop it all from dripping out of my mouth. I struggled to try to swallow it. Part of me was resistant to doing so, but I wanted Mike to be proud. When we finished, I realized J.J. had gotten dressed and was in my kitchen having another beer.

Mike got dressed while I tried to straighten myself out.

"Thanks," I told them. "I had a really great time."

J.J. went out the door, but Mike came back for a moment to tell me, "Here's the thing, Kasey. I really only like girls like you when you are out looking for your first time, and it gets boring for me after that. You know plenty of guys from that chat room, and with those legs strutting around, you could go out to meet guys in a number of places in this city."

"You don't want to see me again?" I bit my lip.

"I'll see you around, but you need to start dating on your own. If I stick around to play with you, then you'll get attached to me. I'm not going to be your boyfriend and I'm not into the whole full time sissy and master thing. I got you started. What you do now is up to you."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 03



The morning after Mike and J.J.'s visit I woke up feeling a lot of strange and conflicting emotions. On the one hand, I felt a sense of relief in knowing that Mike wasn't going to continue to visit and want me to suck his cock. On the other hand, I felt like I'd just been dumped, but feeling like I'd been dumped by a guy was something I'd never imagined feeling. I had started feeling comfortable with knowing there was a man I could go down on regularly, but at the same time I still had a raging battle within me over wanting to dress for men and suck their cocks and wanting to be a regular, ordinary guy.

It was Saturday and I was off from work, so I had my morning coffee, ate some breakfast and took a shower. Then I decided the best way to stop wanting men sexually was to hook up with an old girlfriend and try to rekindle our romance.

I ended up calling Lisa, a woman I had been out with a few times and drifted away from. She was incredibly sexy with a gorgeous body and long black hair, but I felt like we'd never been able to "connect" on any deeper level. Still, I'd found her very attractive and what I wanted most was to have sex with a woman in the hope that would make me feel like a man again.

On the phone Lisa seemed very surprised to hear from me. It had been more than six months since our last date, dinner and drinks at a local restaurant, and afterwards we had spoken a couple of times by phone without ever talking about getting together again. 

"I got busy with all kinds of things," I told her. "I couldn't remember why we never saw each other again."

"I was dating this other guy for a while," she told me, "but it didn't work out. You want to meet up for lunch?"

"That sounds great."

I went through a good deal of effort to remove my fake fingernails and take the polish off my toenails. I scrubbed my face several times to make sure all my make-up was removed and pulled my hair back into the ponytail I usually wore. I put on my regular guy clothes and double and triple checked my appearance. I cleaned up my apartment to make sure there was no evidence of anything having happened there the previous two nights, just in case Lisa came home with me.

When I got to the restaurant, Lisa was sitting out on the patio having some kind of pink drink with an umbrella in it. 

"Honestly, I was really surprised to hear from you," she said as I sat down.

"I was just glad you agreed to meet me," I told her. "I never meant to blow you off. Things in my life just got crazy for a while and, you know..."

"Yeah, shit happens. So what have you been up to?"

I concocted some lies about trying to get a promotion at work and having to deal with some family issues. As I went on, making up all kinds of details, I looked around the restaurant. Men were looking at Lisa, admiring her good looks and her body, and no one was paying any attention at all to me. I felt strangely jealous.

"Well," she said, seeming to have ignored everything I'd made up and gone on about, "like I said, I was seeing this guy Greg and it didn't work out."

She went on about Greg in such mundane detail, talking about everything from his car to his most minute personal habits, that my eyes glazed over and I immediately remembered why I had stopped dating Lisa in the first place. Once she started talking, she didn't stop. Her voice was so flat, and her stories were so boring, that I just wanted to get up and run away.

I battled the urge. I needed to prove to myself I was still a man. There was no one else I knew of that I could call and arrange a quick date with. Lisa was gorgeous and had an incredible body and I was going to get her to have sex with me. That was the plan.

We ate lunch and talked, although the talking was more a case of Lisa droning on about her hairdresser's dog trying a new dog food and her aunt having her kitchen painted a new color and other mind-blowing topics of a similar nature.

After we finished eating and the check came, I interrupted her monologue and said, "How about we rent a couple of movies and go back to my place?"

Lisa looked stunned. "Seriously? What kind of girl do you think I am? You don't call me for six months and you think I'm going to do you?"

"No, of course not," I said, stammering because the force of her reaction stunned me. "I just thought, you know, we could hang out and have a few drinks and watch a movie."

"Yeah, right, at your place. You must think I'm pretty dumb if you think I can't figure out your game."

With that, she got up from the table and stormed out of the restaurant. I handed the waitress my credit card for the check and sighed.

"You're better off without that chick," the waitress told me.

"Yeah, I know," I said, shaking my head. "She's a mess."

"You know, I swear I've seen you around before," the waitress said. "Have you eaten here before?"

"Once or twice, but that was months ago."

"Well, I've only been working here a few weeks." She paused and then took my credit card and check up to the register. When she came back and handed me the copy to sign, she asked if I shopped at the supermarket she went to, which happened to be the same one I frequented.

Without thinking, I told her I did. "Yeah, just down the street from my apartment. I'm surprised you'd remember me from that, though."

I was starting to think maybe I had a chance to pick up this waitress. She was attractive and far more interesting than Lisa.

Then she said, "You are that guy I've seen in those short shorts at the supermarket. I'm kind of surprised you'd be out with a woman. I mean, no offense, but with those legs in those tiny shorts I figured you were into guys."

"I'm not," I blurted out defensively. "I like women."

"Okay, okay, don't bite my head off. I didn't mean any offense, but you know, walking around like that in those shorts, you're not really going to attract women. I'm just saying."

"Well, yeah," I laughed nervously. "I know THAT. It was kind of a dare from my ex-girlfriend."

"You do have really nice legs," she said as I signed the check and left her a sizable tip. "It must have been one hell of a dare," she added. "I've seen you two or three times in those shorts and you stand out in a crowd."

When I got back in my car, I beat my fists against the steering wheel. The waitress remembering me from the supermarket was one of my greatest fears as well as being a great compliment. I wanted to be able to slip into Kasey on a part time basis while remaining a regular guy the rest of the time. Going out to places in my shorts, accompanied by my usual litany of excuses, was something that excited me. It turned me on. Now I was realizing that I couldn't do that and keep my regular life and my life as Kasey the crossdresser completely separate.

"I just need... to stop..." I told myself out loud.

When I got home, I changed into the bathrobe I'd bought a few weeks earlier. It was a short, fluffy white robe that tied around the waist. There were messages on my answering machine, so I pressed the button to play them while I turned on my computer.

"Hi Kasey, my name is Hank. I got your number from a mutual friend, Mike Dixon, who said you might be looking for a date tonight. Give me a call back, my number is..."

The second message was from another man I didn't know. "Hi Kasey, this is Ted, I'm a friend of Mike and J.J.'s and I'm really interested in meeting you..."

The third message was from Lisa. "Hey, I just wanted to tell you, don't ever call me again. You are a pathetic excuse for a man and if you bother me again I am going to have my brother kick your ass you fucking pervert."

"Talk about overreacting," I said to myself after hearing her message. Still, it felt weird, two men wanting to meet me and a woman telling me off. I was slightly bothered by Mike giving my number out to his friends, but at the same time I figured he was trying to make it up to me for "dumping" me the night before.

I wrote down the names and phone numbers of the two men who called, then took a deep breath and crumpled them up and threw them in the trash. "No more of this shit with men," I told myself, "it is just weird."

I went to my computer and signed in to the account I used when I went into the chat rooms where I met men. I was intending to cancel the account and never sign in again, but then I got two instant messages simultaneously from two different men.

"Heard through the grapevine you give great head," said one.

"I would love to give your mouth a workout tonight," said the other.

I quickly logged off the account and walked away from the computer. I decided I needed a stiff drink. I didn't have anything stronger than beer in my apartment, so I grabbed my wallet and keys and started out the door.

Then I stopped. I was wearing pants, having thrown back on the clothes I wore to meet Lisa. I started walking towards my car, shaking off the thought that I wanted to put my shorts on, but then stopped again.

"Why am I going to spend so much time making my legs look sexy if I'm going to hide them?" I asked myself. Then I turned around and went back into my apartment. It was ninety-something degrees out. I didn't exactly need an excuse to wear shorts, even if mine were very short.

I changed into shorts and a t-shirt and drove to the liquor store. When I went inside the only person around was the woman at the register, so I picked out a bottle of rum and a bottle of tequila and brought them up to the counter.

"Hot one out there today," the woman at the register said.

"Yeah, it's hot and humid as heck."

"You know," she said as she rang up my two bottles, "I wish I could wear shorts like those."

"Why not?" I asked. "As hot as it is out you have to do what you can to stay cool, right?"

"If I had legs like yours I would," she smiled.

I got nervous and said something about long shorts being silly and how if you were going to wear shorts, they might as well be short. She just smiled at me as I went out the door, still fumbling with my words.

I sat in my car for a moment after starting the engine. I dropped my head back against the headrest and sighed. I was so terribly confused, feeling flattered and embarrassed at the same time after the remarks by the liquor store cashier. I wanted my legs to be noticed but I now felt more insecure than ever when they were. I knew it was related to the fact that I had sucked cock, and the fact that I had done it two nights in a row. All my excuses for showing off my legs sounded like bullshit to me now. I had always said things about how I just liked not having hair on my body or even that I was a straight crossdresser. Now all I could think about when anyone said anything about my legs or even noticed them was that they knew I was a cocksucker.

I ran into my neighbor, Bill, when I got home. "That must have been quite a party last night," he said when he saw me.

"Where?" I asked.

"At your place," he said. "I could hear you yelling over at my place."

"Oh," I said, blushing. "I'm sorry about that. I'll try to keep it down in the future."

"No worries," he said with a laugh. "My girlfriend and I were both saying, 'well, I guess we know what he likes' and laughing about it."

I laughed nervously, "Oh gosh, no, my girlfriend and I were watching a porn movie and we must have had it on loud or something because we weren't paying attention because we were, you know, getting it on and I was really getting into fucking her and I wasn't paying attention and it must have been on too loud, so that must have been what you heard."

Realizing how stupid I sounded with my lame excuse, trying to cover for the fact that I knew I had been yelling out "I love sucking cock" for at least an hour the previous night, I quickly unlocked my door, went inside and closed the door as fast as I could.

"Dammit," I yelled and slammed my two bottles on the kitchen table. I pulled the bottle of rum out of the paper bag it was in and pulled a two-liter bottle of Coke out of the refrigerator. I put three ice cubs in a glass, poured in a generous amount of rum and topped it off with the Coke. I drank it down quickly, made another drink and walked into my bedroom.

My answering machine was flashing. There were two messages. 

"Kasey, this is Mike," began the first message. "I've given your number to a few friends of mine. They're cool, nothing to be afraid of, but you should meet them. I think you'll like them and I know they'll like you. Call them back."

The second message was from yet another guy. "Hi, my name is Bob. I'd really like to meet you and I'm not looking for just a hookup. Maybe we could just hang out sometime and have a few drinks and talk. No pressure, I promise. Give me a call, my number is..."

I wrote down his phone number and then was going to crumple it up and throw it in the trash with the other two, but instead I pulled those two numbers out of the garbage can, un-crumpled them as best I could, and tossed all three of them on my nightstand. 

I took a shower and shaved, which for me was more involved than most men, but I found shaving my body at least once a day greatly reduced the razor burn I experienced when I went too long between shaves. I dropped the sweaty t-shirt and shorts I'd worn to the liquor store into my dirty clothes bin and put on a fresh t-shirt and pair of shorts. Then I made another drink and went out on my balcony and sat down.

My idea was to just get drunk by myself until I passed out, hoping that would stop the thoughts running wild through my mind. Instead, my thoughts intensified and I could not stop thinking about and remembering how much I had loved being on my knees going down on J.J. and Mike. I had expected Mike to continue seeing me and to continue teaching me how to please a man, but when he walked away, wanting me to start dating men on my own, everything felt different. I wasn't sure why. If Mike was directing the action it seemed to be about him and I, no matter whom else was involved. If I went out on my own it became about something more than just sex games with one man. It felt like I was dating men instead of women and that I was now the woman.

The thought appealed to me, but it also scared me. I didn't think of myself as being "gay." I thought of myself as a crossdresser who liked showing off his legs. When I started sucking cock I could still rationalize it within the context of playing out a fantasy, but starting to date a variety of men was something I wasn't ready to accept; at least not yet.

I went back inside and picked up the phone numbers on my nightstand. I looked at all three and put two of them back down. I picked up my phone and took it outside along with the number.

"Hello, is this Bob?"

"This is Bob."

"Hi, this is Kasey. I got your message and thought I'd call you back."

"Oh, hey, I'm glad you called. I wasn't expecting you to call back, at least not so quickly."

"Are you busy right now?"

"Not really," he said. "My wife is out of town on business and I'm just hanging out watching TV."

"You're married?"

"Oh, yeah, I am. Is that a problem for you?"

"No, not at all," I told him. The idea of him being married put me at ease. "Look, I would really like to just hang out, no pressure like you said. I'd meet you out somewhere, but it is so hot out and I've had a few drinks already..."

"I could come over," he said. "I know that sounds kind of forward and everything, but I'm really not a creep or anything. We can just hang out and listen to music or watch TV or whatever. I don't expect anything... although I would love to see those legs Mike told me about."

"Well, I'm wearing a t-shirt and short shorts right now, is that cool?"

"Oh yeah, that sounds awesome," he said. "I could bring over a pizza or some beer or something if you want."

"Whatever you want to bring, that's cool."

"Okay, I'll figure something out. Just give me your address."

After I told him the address I said, "Bob, really, thanks a lot. You sound really cool and right now I am just not into being pressured or having guys expect anything from me, you know? I don't know what Mike told you, but, yeah, thanks."

"No worries, Kasey, we can just chill. It's totally cool."

I finished my drink and then got a glass of water. I didn't want to be stupid drunk when Bob arrived. What I hoped was that he was sincere in what he said and with that I wanted to make a good impression. The idea of just being able to hang out with a man while dressing in my girl clothes was very appealing.

Before Bob arrived I managed to paint my toenails again. When he did arrive I was barefoot in my short shorts and t-shirt and opened the door very casually after he rang the bell.

"Hi, Bob?"

"Kasey?"

"Come on in," I told him.

He had a large pizza with him and a grocery bag that contained a six-pack of beer and two bags of chips. He set them down on the table and asked if I wanted a beer after taking one himself.

"Sure," I said.

"Nice little place you have here," he told me after handing me the beer. "I like your stereo set-up," he added after seeing my rather outdated stereo system next to my desk. What kind of music are you into?"

"I like a lot of different stuff," I told him and pointed to my rack of CDs and my collection of records. "If you want to put something on, feel free."

I had a five-CD changer and Bob took his time selecting five CDs to load into it. Even at the time, the summer of 1999, my system was obsolete. Still, Bob enjoyed picking out music and asked if I minded if he put it on random play so the songs from the selected CDs would play in random order.

"That's what I usually do," I told him.

"I actually work as a sound engineer," he told me after he sat down. "I like old sound equipment from when they made stuff well. Your receiver is what, like thirty years old?"

I laughed. "Probably twenty or twenty-five; I was pretty young when I got it."

"I like it," he said, and we went on to talk about music for the next half hour. It was very relaxing and felt very normal, like two guys just hanging out. I almost forgot I was wearing short shorts and showing off hot pink toenail polish.

After Bob brought over a second round of beers and a couple of slices of pizza, we started talking about baseball and then, out of the blue, he said, "You have got absolutely the most gorgeous legs I have ever seen."

"Oh, wow, thanks," I said, caught off-guard but not at all embarrassed.

"I hope you don't mind my saying that," he said. "I've been looking at them and thinking about saying that since I got here, but I didn't want to be weird or anything."

"Not weird at all," I said with a smile. "I was wondering what you thought."

"Well, your legs are gorgeous."

"Thanks," I said and excused myself as I needed to visit the bathroom. I took care of business and then noticed the bottle of baby oil sitting on my sink. I picked it up and carried it back to the living room.

"I switched a couple of the CDs," Bob said.

"Yeah, I always do that when I do the random thing," I said and then held out the baby oil to Bob. "Would it be wrong of me to ask if you'd oil my legs for me?"

"Damn," Bob said, his mouth falling open. "You are going to kill me, Kasey."

"Well, if you don't want to..."

"Oh no, I definitely want to, but I don't think I could control myself if I... wow... damn..."

I had pulled my seat over so I could sit and stretch my legs across his lap and tossed him the bottle of baby oil. "Please?"

"I said I was going to be a gentleman," Bob said, looking intently into my eyes. "I start rubbing your legs with oil all bets are off."

I pulled my legs off his lap, stood up and put the oil on the desk next to him. "I like hanging out with you, Bob, and I already know you are a gentleman and I appreciate it. Whatever happens now, I'll still want to hang out with you and I'll still think you are a gentleman."




Kasey's Confession Ch. 03



My phone rang and Bob asked if I needed to answer it. I said I didn't, that I'd just let the answering machine get it. My machine was the type that let you listen to the message as it was being left, and after the beep the message was broadcast through the apartment.

"Hey Kasey, this is Tony. I got your number from Mike. He said you were looking for guys to hook up with so, yeah, give me a call. My number is..."

"How about a shot or two of that tequila," Bob said with a nervous laugh, referring to the tequila I bought that afternoon that was sitting on the kitchen table.

"Sounds good," I told him and strutted into the kitchen wiggling my ass as best I could. "Do you want lime?" I asked him from the kitchen.

"If you have one, sure."

"How about salt?"

"No, that's okay."

"Would you like me to put on my high heels?"

"Definitely."

I went to the closet and slipped into my platform heels and strutted back into the living room with two shots of tequila with slices of lime.

"What do you think?" I asked, turning and posing for him in my heels.

"I think I might have a heart attack," he said and took the tequila. "If I can be completely honest with you, Mike hooks up with a lot of guys like you, and sometimes he offers to introduce me to them. I am happily married, but I do like, well, a little kink from time to time. What I am trying to say is, the crossdressers Mike usually introduces me to are usually out of shape balding fat guys who like to put on a dress. I know you're not even all dressed up and you don't have makeup on or your hair done up like you probably do when you go out, but with those legs and that cute ass of yours, you are hot even without all that stuff."

"Wow... I am... flattered..."

"I'd really like it if we could be friends, and be able to hang out like this," Bob said.

I sat down and said nothing, crossing my legs and looking down at the floor feeling like I had just been given the 'let's be friends' speech by a guy.

"I don't think that came out right," Bob said, sounding apologetic. "It isn't that I'm not sexually attracted to you, Kasey. To be perfectly honest, I've had a hard-on since I walked in here. I just want to be able to do both."

"You mean you want to, well, be my boyfriend?"

"No, that's not it either, no, I don't mean that. I mean more like friends with benefits or something like that. You know, like we can hang out like friends and sometimes we..."

"Get benefits?"

"Yeah, something like that."

I stretched my legs back across his lap. "Benefits?" I asked with a grin.

He picked up the bottle of oil after running his hands over my thighs a couple of times. Then he stopped and looked over at me. "Do you have a towel or something? If I get this baby oil all over my pants my wife will kill me."

"Just take them off," I said with a shrug. "If that's cool with you."

I pulled my legs off him as he took off his shoes, undid his pants and pulled them down and off. He stood for a moment in his boxers, trying to straighten himself out and being unable to hide the erection he was sporting. I just smiled.

"Take off the boxers," I said, "for me."

He stood uncomfortably, fidgeting and saying something about not wanting to "go too fast."

"If you don't take them off I am going to pull them down on you," I said. "You are making me crazy trying to hide your boner from me."

He sat down and slowly slid his boxers down, acting almost shy about exposing himself, hiding his cock under his arm as he got them down to his ankles and kicked them free. Once he did I put my legs back across his lap, loving the way my smooth and soft legs felt against his hairy, many thighs.

He took the oil and slipped my heels off my feet. As they dropped to the floor with a pair of thuds, his cock became exposed, springing out from between his legs where he had hidden it after removing his boxers. It was extremely hard, but smaller than J.J. and Mike's cocks. 

"I have this problem," I told Bob as he opened the bottle of baby oil, "I want so BADLY to go down on men. I fantasize about it constantly, but I also worry that if I keep doing it I won't be able to be a regular guy anymore. I don't want people to look at me funny or hate me or not want to be around me."

Bob squirted generous amounts of baby oil on each of my thighs, so much that it dripped onto my carpet. He started rubbing it into my legs with both hands. They felt so good, especially on my thighs, and I loved the way oil made my legs glisten and shine. 

"Maybe you worry too much about being the kind of guy you think people want you to be," he said. "Sometimes you just have to be who you want to be, who you know you are."

My own erection was straining against my shorts so hard I had to adjust it. Bob smiled and continued to massage my legs with baby oil. His cock was now freely rubbing against my oiled calf, and I willingly rubbed back against it.

Bob moaned, and I told him, "I love being able to get men hard with my legs. I love being able to get men off, and I love sucking cock."

"Nothing wrong with that," he moaned as his hard cock and my leg continued rubbing against each other.

"I want to dress up sexy for them and make my face and hair pretty for them," I said as I moved my legs so I could hold his cock between my calves and squeeze it. "The first time I went down on a guy I didn't know if I'd like it, but as soon as I put my lips around it I knew it was what I wanted."

My phone started ringing again.

Bob moaned as I rubbed his cock between my calves, his eyes rolling back and then closing as he breathed out the words, "Then stop fighting it..."

The answering machine picked up. "Hey, this is Neil; I got your number from Mike. Give me a call sometime, love to hook up..."

I pulled my legs off his lap and slid quietly down onto the floor on my knees in front of him. I took his oily cock in my hand and stroked it.

"I'm going to explode," he moaned.

I slipped it between my lips, and while the oil tasted nasty, I loved the way it made his cock slide so easily into my mouth. I barely had time to start sucking on it when he sat forward, his body stiffened and he moaned out my name. His cock seized up in my mouth and I felt the wonderful sensation of his orgasm and his cum firing into my mouth. I managed to catch it all, and swallow it, by the time he regained his senses.

"Damn," he said with a smile. "That was unbelievable."

"I agree," I laughed.

I got up and brought him a towel, figuring he'd want to clean up the baby oil that was all over him before getting dressed. He thanked me and did so, then sat back in the chair.

"So," I said, "friends with benefits?"

"Yeah," he laughed. "Definitely."

"So we can hang out and it doesn't have to feel uncomfortable? And you won't get all weird about me hooking up with other guys?"

"You can even tell me about them if you want," he said, "but you don't have to. I know you are going to be meeting a lot of guys, and that's cool. I would like very much to be your friend... with benefits."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 04



After Bob left, I called back each of the four men who had left messages on my answering machine. First, though, I called Mike and made sure he would vouch for all of them.

"They're all guys who are into girls like you," Mike told me. "None of them is going to stab your or rob you or stalk you or anything like that. You have any problems with them, let me know."

I told him how I'd already met Bob, and he didn't seem surprised. He cut me off when I started giving him details, saying he didn't want to know about all that and how he wasn't my "chatty Cathy girlfriend" and said he just wanted me to have fun and stay safe.

"And I want you to suck a LOT of cock, Kasey," he told me.

"Are you sure you don't want to come over?" I asked.

"Twice was one time more than I usually do," he replied. "You've got plenty of other guys who want to fuck that mouth of yours. Don't get stuck on me."

"I'm not stuck—"

He hung up.

I arranged to meet Hank on Sunday afternoon, Ted on Sunday night, Tony on Monday night and Neil on Tuesday night. After I looked at my appointment book I wondered who I would be meeting on Wednesday night and giggled.

I beat back any misgivings or thoughts I had which made me want to back out of my arrangements or stop doing what I was doing.

It was just after eight o'clock and I was still feeling worked up after Bob's visit. There was a store near me that sold porn DVDs and assorted sex toys and I knew it was open late, at least until ten or eleven o'clock. I decided to drive down to it and see if they had any DVDs with people like me in them having really raunchy adventures.

When I got there, wearing my shorts, there were a half dozen men in the store along with two women. They all turned and looked at me, but I acted as if I didn't notice. I started casually looking through the DVDs, starting with the straight porn and working my way over to a section marked "Trannies/Shemales." I found a couple titles that looked interesting and snatched them up and was about to head to the register when I looked over at the sex toys.

There were a number of dildos in packages on hooks against the wall. I stared at them for a moment, not sure if I really wanted to buy one, or deal with the looks I might get from buying one, and then chose to walk towards them for a closer look. I found one, an eight-inch long thick black dildo and pulled it down.

Once I saw there was no one at the register other than the older woman who worked there, I ambled over and put my purchases down in front of her. I tried looking away, very obviously trying to avoid conversation, and she didn't care. She probably saw all kinds of weird things in the store.

"We have another one just like this on sale," she told me plainly while holding up the dildo.

"What?" I said, caught off-guard.

"Pretty much the same thing," she said, completely without emotion. "Over on the end up there," she added, pointing to the end of the dildo display.

I snatched up the dildo I had picked out and nodded. I made my way back to the display, put the first one back and got one of the sale ones. The process was very uncomfortable, with the other shoppers looking at me funny, but at least the cashier seemed to have no concerns or judgments whatsoever.

When I left, I tossed the brown paper bag with my purchases into the car and started the engine. I was about to pull out when I noticed there was some kind of advertisement under my windshield wiper. Annoyed, I got out of the car and pulled it off my windshield. I was about to toss it on the ground when I saw big letters on the front that said "Archies: The Alternative Lifestyle Club for Adults."

I looked at it for a couple of minutes, saw the address and information about how the club welcomed gay and lesbian folks, swingers, crossdressers, and a host of other kinds of people. "Whatever your kink, come and have a drink with us" appeared to be their motto. I held onto it and stuck it in the bag with my purchases, all while wondering why I'd never heard of this place before.

I got home, ate some of Bob's now cold pizza, and fixed myself a rum and Coke. I figured I would watch one of the movies I'd bought and maybe practice my cocksucking skills on my new dildo. Then I saw the flyer for Archie's again and took it out on the balcony with me. I read the whole flyer backwards and forwards while enjoying my drink and started thinking about checking the place out.

When I finished my drink I decided I would just go and scope it out. I wouldn't get all dressed up, I would just go in my shorts and sneakers with a decent t-shirt. According to the pictures a lot of people went very casually dressed while there were some dressed all in leather and I could see a couple of ladies who looked like they might have some male equipment tucked away.

There was a cover charge, and the man at the door was very friendly. He didn't look twice at my white short shorts and the pink t-shirt I was wearing. Inside the front door was a bar in the center of a large room. It was a round bar that enclosed two bartenders serving drinks. Beyond that were several rooms with music and strobe lights and what appeared to be a stage people were dancing on. For the moment I sat down at the bar and ordered a rum and Coke.

"New in town or just new to Archie's?" asked the bartender, a tall man with dark hair and a leather vest.

"New to Archie's," I told him.

"We're cool with whatever you're into," he told me. "The only thing I always tell new folks is to watch yourself outside, and in the parking lot. There are a lot of people in this neighborhood who don't like us and don't like anything we do."

"I gotcha," I said.

Two men dressed in jeans and sleeveless t-shirts came out of one of the inner rooms and sat down at the bar on either side of me.

"Hey darling, can we buy you a drink?"

"Already got one," I said with a smile, shaking my rum and Coke in the air in front of me.

"How about if your next round is on us?"

"I think I could live with that," I said, feeling flattered that men wanted to buy me drinks, something that had never happened before.

"You like men?" the guy who offered to buy me the drink asked.

I paused for a moment, swallowed hard, collected myself and said, "Yes."

"Your legs are very shiny," he said.

"Shiny?"

"Yeah, shiny; the strobe light from the dance floor was hitting them and it was mesmerizing."

I looked down at my legs, which I had crossed while sitting at the bar, and realized I'd never cleaned off the baby oil Bob had rubbed on them earlier. In the dim lighting of the bar, with the strobe light from the other room, they were very obviously smooth, tanned and shiny.

"I hope they didn't distract you," I said.

"Oh, we're not complaining," he said. Then he turned to the bartender and said, "Put his tab on mine, I've got his drinks tonight."

"Thank you," I said. "You are just too kind."

"Are you going to come back and see the shows?" he asked.

"Shows?"

"Yeah, they've got a drag show in one of the rooms tonight and in the other one some kind of lesbian wrestling or something, pretty hot whatever it is, and then there is just the dance club. Maybe we'll see you back there later?"

"Sure, I'll check it out after this drink."

They left and I sat quietly at the bar for a moment until the bartender came over.

"Those guys okay?" I asked him.

"Regulars," he said. "Yeah, they're okay. If you can believe it, their names are Tom and Jerry."

"Like the cartoon?"

"Yeah, they're harmless, they're just real horn dogs."

I got a second round and found myself starting to admire the bartender's physique. He was only wearing the leather vest without a shirt underneath and his jeans were very tight, making it very easy to see the rather large bulge in his pants. He smiled every time he saw me looking at him.

"Hey, I've got to go get some stock in the back room," he told me after asking if I wanted another round. "Would you mind giving me a hand? I can't leave the bar unattended and Charlie over there is the only other bartender on up here."

Three minutes later I was on my knees in front of the bartender, in the back room, with his nine inch cock in my mouth and his hands on my head pulling me back and forth. He wasn't interested in having me suck his cock; he wanted to fuck my mouth.

He poured something from a bottle onto his cock as he fucked my mouth. It tasted fruity and slimy, but definitely helped his cock slide back and forth easier in my mouth. I tried not to gag, and when I did I tried not to gag too hard.

"Come on, cocksucker, take it," he moaned as he pulled my head back and forth harder and faster. "You know this is what you came here for."

Moments later he pulled out of my mouth and, while holding my hair with his left hand, used his right hand to point his cock in my face while gripping it tightly. When he loosened his grip, his semen shot out of him like a cannon, hitting me full in the face.

Someone was clapping, and I turned abruptly as I thought we had been alone. It was Charlie, the other bartender. He was sitting on a small stack of boxes and hopped up after Charlie put his cock away and pulled up his pants.

"My turn," he laughed. "Catch ya later, Jimmy," he told the first bartender.

I tried to get up, but I felt weak and the room was spinning. The combination of too much booze and Jimmy's rough treatment had left me feeling helpless. I opened my mouth and willingly accepted Charlie's cock and seconds later he was yanking my head back and forth fucking my mouth with the same enthusiasm Jimmy had shown.

He also shot his load in my face, and I found myself on my knees in a dirty back storeroom with cum dripping off my face, in my hair and dripping down my pink shirt.

"Baby, you are going to be very popular around here," Jimmy said. "Welcome to the neighborhood."

He tossed me a bar rag, which stunk of beer, and told me to clean myself up. I tried the best I could, but I was covered in semen.

"You can slip out the back door," he told me and walked me to a door marked 'Emergency Exit Only.'

"I... I..."

"You what?"

"I enjoyed myself," I said quietly.

"Guy comes in flashing legs like yours, it isn't hard to figure out what he's looking for. You'll find a lot of guys wanting what you're selling around here."

I walked out to the parking lot across from the emergency exit, found my car and drove home, drenched in cum and smiling.



Kasey's Confession Ch. 05



My sleep that night was haunted by dreams of men in dark shadows hissing at me and jumping out with monstrous cocks as big as my arm. I woke up in a sweat, leaned over to see it was only four in the morning and tried to go back to sleep.

When I finally got out of bed at eight o'clock my mouth was dry and filled with the taste of booze and salt water. I had slept in a black teddy I'd bought on a whim and when I looked in the mirror I realized that although I washed my face repeatedly and changed my clothes, I had forgotten about my hair which was sticky with dried semen.

"I am such a slut," I muttered to myself.

I knew I was meeting Hank that afternoon. He was coming over at two o'clock, so I had plenty of time to pull myself together and get ready. I had no idea what to expect from him, as although he was pleasant on the phone he didn't have much to say. I also knew I was meeting another of my callers, Ted, at eight o'clock that night.

In the span of three days I had gone down on five different men after having insisted, in spite of fantasies that ran contrary to those insistences, that I would never suck cock. Now it was all I could think of. I was thirty-three years old, I'd never been in a relationship with a woman that lasted more than six months, I liked wearing women's clothes, I loved showing off my smooth girlie legs, and I was meeting men every day for the purpose of giving them blowjobs.

Even Bob, who was a fairly regular kind of guy, and who wanted to be my friend, would never have become my friend if it wasn't for Mike getting me started sucking cock and then introducing me to other men. 

The amount of attention I was getting was a completely new thing to me. I was usually all but invisible to people. I had trouble meeting girls and at work people usually only noticed me when they needed to, because of work related matters. No one ever wanted to hang out with me or be friends. When I went out to a work related function, usually a group of us meeting at a bar to celebrate someone retiring or getting married, I ended up sitting alone and being boxed out of conversations.

While part of me kept saying, in my head, "Sucking cock is so gross" and "Being with men is nasty," that part of me was getting shouted down more and more each day. I loved being able to dress up sexy for men, to show off my feminine legs to an appreciative audience, and it was impossible to deny that I loved sucking cock. 

I went out and bought a couple of bras, and some women's tops, before Hank was due to arrive. I bought them wearing my shorts and when I volunteered to the salesgirl that I was buying these things as "a gift for my girlfriend" she just looked at me funny. She hadn't asked.

Two men were smoking cigarettes outside the entrance to the store. They looked at me as I hurried past them and muttered "Faggot" at me. I ignored them, even as the word felt like a dagger jabbing into my heart.

I filled one of my new C-cup bras with socks after putting it on and got dressed up completely for my two o'clock date. I had washed and blow-dried my hair, using plenty of mousse and hairspray to give it a kind of 80s girl look, and I printed off several pages of "makeup tips" from a website that I used as a guide to make my face as pretty as possible.

By the time Hank arrived I looked sexier and prettier than I ever had. For the first time ever I was wearing a plaid, pleated miniskirt I bought because it had a kind of "naughty Catholic schoolgirl" look to it along with a pair of five inch heels with laces that wrapped around my ankle and up my calf. It was an odd combination, but I thought it worked, and when I looked in my full-length mirror I felt proud, not ashamed, of who I was.

When Hank arrived, he brought me a small bouquet of flowers that looked like he'd gotten them at a drugstore. I was tremendously flattered by the gesture and took the glass vase I kept in my closet, which I had once gotten years ago as a Christmas present and had never used, and put the flowers immediately into water.

Hank wore a black t-shirt and black jeans, along with a rather absurd looking cowboy hat. He seemed vaguely annoyed after I ushered him inside my apartment, so I asked him if everything was okay. He shrugged, so I asked him if he was disappointed.

"Not yet," he muttered. "You got any beers?"

I nodded and brought him one, then stood there feeling rather uncomfortable as he sat down on my living room chair and stared out through the open blinds of the sliding glass door leading out to my balcony. He mumbled a "thanks" and continued staring out the glass door and away from me.

"Can I get you anything else?" I asked. "I have some chips—"

"Just shut the fuck up and suck my dick," he barked.

He sucked down more than half of the beer I had given him and stood up. As he unbuckled his jeans and started pulling them down, I went over to close the blinds.

"Leave 'em open," he barked, "let your neighbors see what a sissy you are."

My balcony was on the second floor of my apartment complex and overlooked the swimming pool. While you couldn't see into my apartment from the ground, there were a number of apartments around the pool with balconies and from any of them you could see across and into my apartment.

"I'd rather close them," I said.

"Come here," Hank snapped, throwing his cowboy hat over onto the couch and sitting down, his pants unbuckled and unzipped but still mostly pulled up to his waist.

"I don't..."

"Get over here and lie across my lap," he said.

"What?"

"You heard me," he said, sounding very annoyed. "Get the fuck over here and lie across my lap. I am going to give you a spanking."

Part of me wanted to tell him to get out, but the only voice that came out of me was weak and feeble, and my protests sounded far too pathetic to be taken seriously. I walked towards him, nervous and suddenly unsteady in my heels and stood in front of him, wobbly and shaking.

"Please don't hurt me," I said in a tiny, feminine voice that leaked out of me without my having to imitate the voice consciously.

"Lie across my lap, face down," he said sternly.

It felt more than a little awkward, but I managed to lie across his lap. My body was twitching and quivering and it only got worse when Hank pulled up my skirt and ran his hand over my ass cheeks, which were left uncovered by my pink thong panties.

"Men don't want to play games with you," he told me.

"Yes sir."

He pulled his hand back and brought it back down, slapping my right ass cheek hard. "Are you ashamed of being a cocksucker?" he asked.

"No sir."

He brought his hand down and hit my ass cheek harder. "I said, are you ashamed of being a cocksucker?"

I had tears in my eyes as he slapped my ass a third and then a fourth time. "Yes," I cried, "I am ashamed of being a cocksucker."

"But you are a cocksucker, aren't you?" he asked sternly as he brought his hand down to smack my ass a fifth and then a sixth time.

Sobbing and whimpering, I answered him. "Yes, I am a cocksucker."

He kept spanking me, hitting one cheek and then the other, until I was crying uncontrollably, not so much from the pain but from the full and open confession. "I am a cocksucker," I said through my tears, over and over as the spanking continued.

"Stop trying to pretend you aren't," he said before telling me to get up.

I struggled to get to my feet, unsteady standing in my heels with my knees shaking and tears running down my cheeks. As I pulled my skirt down over my ass I could feel the sting from his spanking and at the same time realized that my dick was hard as a rock.

"You have some fans," Hank said and motioned towards the balcony with his head.

I looked out through the open blinds and saw two women standing on the balcony across from mine. They were smoking cigarettes and looking in the direction of my apartment, but not directly at me.

"Let's go out on the balcony and have a beer," Hank said.

"Like this?" I stammered, looking down at how I was dressed.

"Yes, bitch, like that. Are you ashamed of how you look?"

"No sir," I said, looking down at the floor and realizing I didn't want to get spanked again. "I don't want to be ashamed."

The women on the balcony were not across the pool from me, but to the left of my apartment where they had a diagonal view of my balcony. I convinced myself their angle on my apartment didn't give them a clear view of what had been going on inside, and after Hank chugged down the last of the beer I had given him, I took it and came back with two fresh ones.

"Shall we step outside, sissy legs? Such a nice day outside, don't you think?"

"Yes, sir, it is a very nice day."

With Hank right behind me, I opened the sliding glass door and stepped outside, trying not to think too much about how I was dressed. I was starting to feel steady walking in my heels again, and tried to act completely natural as I stepped out onto the balcony.

One of the women whistled at me, like the cliché of the construction workers whistling at an attractive woman who walked by. I smiled weakly and did not look at them as Hank stepped out next to me and sat down on one of the two plastic lawn chairs I had out on the balcony.

"Hi ladies," Hank said. He had fixed his jeans so they were appropriately buckled up and had his cowboy hat on again, which he tipped to the women as he spoke.

"Hey there," one of the women shouted back.

"You two interested in having a beer with us?" Hank asked, waving the bottle he was drinking.

"Thanks," shouted back the woman, "but we're waiting on some friends. We're going to the festival today."

"We could walk over," Hank said, holding up the beer and saying, "free beer."

"Yeah, if you want," the first woman said.

"Your friend is cute," said the second woman, laughing.

I followed Hank like a puppy and silently watched as he pulled a six-pack of beer out of my refrigerator and started out the door. Fully dressed as I was, in the middle of a Sunday afternoon, I kept my head down and walked directly behind him hoping no one would notice me.

I could feel the stares of people pulling into the parking lot in their cars, or walking past, but I kept looking down, feeling a strong sense of humiliation in how I was walking in heels and a skirt with a lacy woman's top and a stuffed bra, not to mention the makeup I was wearing and my ridiculously styled hair.

We walked up the stairs to the apartment of the women and Hank rang the doorbell while I looked sheepishly down at the ground and my pink toenails and the laces of my strappy heels.

The door opened and the women were standing there, giggling as they told us to come on in.

One said to the other, "I told you it was a guy," while the other laughed and said "no kidding, I was just messing with you."

Hank handed them each a bottle of beer and they led the way out onto their balcony. It was obvious that I was nervous and uncomfortable, but Hank and the women carried on like everything was normal.

"I'm Hank, and this is my friend Kasey," he told the women.

"Kat and Amber," said the first woman. "You both live across the way there? I think I've seen Kasey before, but usually not all, you know, dressed up."

"Kasey lives there," Hank told them. "I'm just visiting."

"I bet," laughed Amber.

I stood quietly in the corner, nursing my beer and trying to make myself invisible.

"Kasey probably has a lot of 'friends,' don't you, Kasey?" Kat asked me.

"I guess," I muttered quietly.

"Come on, Kasey, don't be so shy," Hank said and grabbed my arm, pulling me out of the corner and back into the group.

"I love your shoes, Kasey," said Amber.

"Thank you," I said, looking at the ground.

"Look at people when they talk to you, sissy boy," Hank said and lightly slapped my ass through my pleated skirt.

I hopped forward and looked up at Amber. "I'm... I'm... I'm glad you like them."

"So, what are you Kasey, like a tranny or whatever they call them?" Kat asked.

"I... I'm... um..." I couldn't come up with an answer, but then Hank slapped me on the ass just hard enough to bring the sting of the earlier spanking back to the forefront of my memory.

"Tell them what you are, Kasey," he said. "Tell them."

"I'm... a... cock... sucker..."

The women laughed. "I have no doubt of THAT," Kat snickered. "I mean, come on."

"Show us," Amber suggested.

"What... do... you... mean?"

"I don't know, like a little demonstration," laughed Amber.

"I think that can be arranged," Mike said and started unbuckling his pants.

"No," I said, completely flustered. "I can't do this," I told them and tried to run back inside.

Mike grabbed my arm and pulled me towards him. He looked at me, shaking his head, and then pushed me down on my knees in front of him.

"Okay, okay," interjected Kat, "that's enough, chill out."

"I was just messing with y'all," said Amber.

I felt humiliated as I got back up and regained my balance in my heels. Hank lightly smacked me on the ass and pointed me towards the balcony railing, which I stepped over to and leaned against, facing Hank and the two girls.

They spent most of the remaining time that Hank and I were at their apartment standing on the balcony laughing and making jokes about me and my appearance. Hank encouraged them, calling me a sissy and a slut numerous times and then telling him he'd met me through a friend who said I always went down on guys on the "first date."

"Well, that'll get you a reputation," Kat told me with a laugh.

"Thanks for inviting us over," Hank said as he finished his beer. "I need to take Kasey back over to his place so I can get a blowjob before heading home."

"Have fun," the women told us.

I felt totally humiliated by the visit to my neighbors and kept my head down as Hank marched me back to my apartment. I looked straight down at the ground and tried to block out any sound or sight of people who might be seeing me walking outside dressed the way I was.

I had just gotten up the stairs to my apartment when I heard a familiar voice. It was Bill, my next door neighbor.

"Wow, Kasey, you look... uh, interesting."

I looked up, feeling completely embarrassed and managed to mutter a very meek "hello" to Bill before going back into my apartment with Hank, who said "hey man" to Bill with a snicker before we went back inside.

Once the door closed, Hank told me to get on my knees. Instead, I lost it and started beating my hands on his chest and saying "No, no, no, I can't do THIS anymore." I tried to make fists to hit him with but my long, fake fingernails made it too difficult to make a fist so I just slapped helplessly at him with my open palms.

"You are what you are," Hank said without any real reaction to me beating on his chest other than waiting until I wore myself out and then pulling my hands off of him. "Get down on your knees and suck my cock, you pansy," he ordered after taking me by the hand and dragging me into the living room.

While I dropped to my knees, he turned the chair in my living room around so that my kneeling in front of it would be fully visible through the open blinds. Then he pulled off his shoes and pants and sat down in the chair in front of me.

The women across the way had gone back inside, but still I felt exposed by how I was doing what I was doing in front of what was basically an open window. I gently wrapped my hand around the base of Hank's cock, which was very thick but no more than six inches long, and started lowering my head towards it.

Just before my lips touched the head of Hank's cock, I saw, out of the corner of my eye, the two women across the way come back out on their balcony along with three other women. They were pointing towards me and I could see they were laughing.

"Don't you even think about stopping," Hank said sternly. "Suck that cock."

I closed my eyes and let my lips slide over the head of his cock, and then I stopped thinking about anything else. I loved the way cock felt as it entered my mouth, how it tasted and how it smelled. I slowly lowered my head and let my lips glide down the shaft until my nose was buried in Hank's pubic hair.

We had only been back in my apartment for five, or maybe ten, minutes, but in that time my thoughts had gone from the extreme of wanting to run away and never do what I was doing again to where all I could think about was, "I want to suck more cock. I need to suck MORE cock."

There was nothing I'd ever done or experienced in my life that I enjoyed more than sucking cock.

I knew my neighbors and their friends were watching and laughing at me. They saw a guy dressed up like a woman in high heels and makeup wearing a bra stuffed with socks on his knees going down on another guy. Whatever they thought of me, at that moment, while I was going down on Hank, I didn't care. I was loving it, and the way my own erection was rubbing against the material of my panties only ratcheted up my excitement.

My head bobbed up and down on Hank's cock. I let it slip out of my mouth and jerked on it while I lapped at his balls and then slowly slid the full length of his cock back into my mouth. I wanted to be good at sucking cock. I didn't just want men to know I gave head on the first date. I wanted them to leave thinking they'd gotten the best blowjob of their lives.

As I felt Hank getting closer to orgasm, my body started tingling, and I went faster, bobbing my head up and down and sliding up and down the shaft before sucking wickedly on the head. I felt his body tense and mine did as well as he exploded into my mouth.

I held his cum in my mouth, not wanting to let any of it drip out, then let go of his cock and tilted my head back, swallowing all of his semen in one big swallow.

It wasn't until after Hank left that I realized I had cum in my panties while sucking his cock.



Kasey's Confession Ch. 06



I had drawn my blinds closed and changed into my short, terrycloth bathrobe. I knew I had another date scheduled for eight o'clock that night and part of me wished I hadn't made it. There were errands I needed to run, and my apartment needed a good cleaning, all of which sounded like an excuse not to meet another man. 

Then, as I was sitting back drinking a cup of tea, the phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Kasey, this is Ted."

"Hi Ted, how are you?"

"I'm good, but I'm sorry. I won't be able to make it tonight. Something came up and I won't be able to get out of it. Can we make it another time?"

"Sure, just give me a call and we can try to work something out."

I had gotten out of my evening date without any effort. I relaxed and decided I didn't want to clean or run errands. I just wanted to kick back and watch a movie or listen to some music.

I saw my "tranny" porn movies where I had stashed them and popped one in. The first movie started with someone who had obviously been taking hormones of some kind, since she was very feminine looking despite having a very obvious set of male genitals in her panties. She was just hanging out in her apartment, like me, when her phone rang. She talked to the man on the other end of the call and invited him over. It was hitting a little close to home and I was getting very aroused.

The man showed up with two of his buddies, which got me on the edge of my seat. They started kissing and fondling her, stripping her naked and then pushing her down on her knees, at which point they all pulled out very big cocks and pushed them in her face.

I started stroking myself as I watched her go back and forth between the three men, then I got my dildo and started sucking on it in my best imitation of her obvious cocksucking skills. Then they got her down on all fours and one of the men got behind her and started pushing his hard cock into her ass.

"Oh wow," I said, "that is so hot..."

I got the bottle of baby oil that Bob had rubbed my legs with and poured it on the dildo. Watching the movie, I leaned back and started pushing the oiled dildo into my asshole. I was surprised at how little resistance I felt. My asshole seemed to open very willingly and welcome the dildo inside.

As the man in the movie pushed his whole cock into the tranny's ass, she moaned out, "Yeah baby, I needed to get fucked so badly. Give it to me. Give it to me hard and deep!"

I pushed the dildo into myself hard and started working it back and forth in my ass. I moaned and cried out, "Oh yeah, I need to get fucked so badly. I need to get fucked. I need to get fucked."

I was jerking my cock so hard and fast it felt like I was going to pull it out by the roots, all while I kept pounding the dildo back and forth in my ass. "Oh wow... she is getting it at both ends... oh wow... she has TWO cocks in her mouth and one in her ASS... oh wow... that's what I NEED..."

I then I came, my body shaking and bucking like I was having a seizure. I leaned forward and sat down hard on the dildo, driving it deeper inside me as cum shot out of me.

I collapsed, falling backwards and staring up at the ceiling. I was exhausted and feeling sick to my stomach. I felt the dildo sliding out of my ass and falling onto the floor. I sighed.

I used to just shave my legs and show them off. Then I started tanning them and doing everything I could to make them look sexy. Then I started fantasizing about going down on men. Then I was going down on men. Now I was not only fantasizing about getting fucked up my ass, I was acting it out by using a dildo.

In four days I had gone down on six different men. Thinking about it made me sick and turned me on at the same time. I was freaking out about the idea of it turning me on. I was disturbed that I liked it. Over and over the same thought went through my mind.

"I don't want to be like this."

I took a shower and changed into jeans and a plain black t-shirt. I put on my regular men's sneakers and walked out to my car. I fought off the impulses that told me to change into shorts, the same impulses that kept telling me "let's go get some cock" and drove off.

I decided to go to the mall. I would just be a regular guy out shopping. I needed to get a couple of new shirts for work, so that became my mission.

As I walked through the mall, with barely anyone paying me any attention, I found myself missing the stares and the curious, sometimes confused, looks. There were women in shorts and I found myself feeling jealous of them, especially the ones with very attractive legs. In the past I would have stared and wanted to get with the women they belonged to, but now I just felt jealous of them for being able to show their legs off freely without anyone thinking it was strange or unnatural.

I walked past women's clothing stores. Since it was summer, there were plenty of shorts on display in the windows and I paused in front of them, wanting to buy a pair of short cut-offs or some other sexy pair on display. "Half-off all juniors' shorts" screamed one sign at me with a display of several different styles I really wanted to be wearing.

I walked away and headed to the men's clothing store where I usually bought the collared shirts I wore to work. I found two shirts I liked in my size and walked up to the counter. The salesgirl was friendly and, since it was her job, she complimented me on my selections. Then she talked about the weather and how hot it had been lately.

"Let me ask you something," I said. "I was thinking about buying my girlfriend some shorts, as a present more or less. Would that be weird?"

"Well," she said with a smile, "most women prefer to buy their own clothes, but I think it would depend on how well you know her. Have you been together long?"

"We've been together a long time," I said. "I just, well, I like seeing her in shorts, and I don't want to seem like a pervert or something."

She laughed. "Well, if you've been together a long time I'm sure she already knows what you like. I had a boyfriend once who bought me some lingerie that really wasn't what I liked and it was totally the wrong size. I mean, do I look like a size 16 to you?"

"Oh gosh, no," I laughed back. "I know her size, so I don't have that issue. I'm pretty sure she'd like these shorts, the ones I saw in the window of the store across the way, but I keep going back and forth wondering if it would be too weird."

"Go for it," she told me and handed me the bag with my shirts. "Women love when men buy them presents, even if they're a little weird. Shorts aren't that weird. I've just never had a guy buy me any clothes other than lingerie and underwear, and that can get pretty weird."

I took my bag, thanked her, and walked back over to the store with the shorts in the window. As I found myself browsing, looking for shorts in my size, the salesgirl there approached me.

"Can I help you find something?"

"I really like your shorts," I said. "I kept walking by imagining my girlfriend in them and thought I'd see if you had them in her size, but your sizes seem to run too small."

"What size are you looking for?"

"A woman's size 12 or 14," I told her. "She's tall and has really long legs..."

She helped me find a stash of shorts that were in my size, or what I claimed was my girlfriend's size. I went through them, selecting three different pairs while constantly talking about my imaginary girlfriend and then told her I was ready to make my purchases.

"Would you like to try them on first?" she asked, catching me completely off-guard.

"What? Oh gosh, no, why would I..."

"Sweetie, you keep holding them up to yourself and looking in the mirror. Go ahead and try them on. Our dressing rooms are very private and you want to make sure they fit, right?"

I nodded silently, looked around to see that no one else was in the store, and took the three pairs of shorts into the dressing room. I sat and stared at the shorts, deciding that I was just going to pretend to try them on, waited a few minutes and started walking back out into the store.

The salesgirl was on the phone with someone. "Yeah, Derek, I swear, there is this guy trying on girls shorts in the dressing room. Get someone to cover for you and get over here, I'm telling you he's just the kind of guy you were looking for."

I backed up and ducked back into the changing room. I couldn't decide what to do. I could go out and quickly pay for my three pairs of shorts, or even say I didn't want them and just leave, and take off. Part of me was just really curious about who Derek was and why the salesgirl thought I was "the kind of guy" Derek was "looking for."

"I came here to be a regular guy and stay out of trouble," I told myself as I looked at the three pairs of short shorts and then at the men's jeans I was wearing. I thought about how I used to walk through a mall like this one, checking out women, especially women with legs in short shorts. Now whenever I saw a woman like that all I thought about was how I wanted men to look at me the way I did at her.

After a long few moments sitting and staring into space, I muttered to myself, "I am who I am," and took off my sneakers and jeans and tried on the first pair of shorts. I stood up and looked in the full length mirror on the dressing room door and smiled, "Damn, these shorts are HOT."

I tried on all three pairs and they all fit nicely and they all looked very sexy on me. I thought about putting my jeans back on, but I didn't want to be ashamed, I wanted to be who I was, so I kept the third pair of shorts on. I wasn't sure if I'd wear them home or not, but I wanted to show the salesgirl and maybe "Derek," if he was there.

"What do you think?" I asked as I came out of the dressing room.

I was standing in the entranceway to the back of the store where the dressing rooms were, avoiding being seen by people walking through the mall. I figured I could at least play it off as a joke, depending on the reaction, and then I saw the salesgirl standing there with a young guy, who looked like he was barely of legal drinking age, in a uniform shirt from the pretzel kiosk, standing next to her.

"Okay, damn, those are some unbelievable legs," said the salesgirl. "No wonder you wanted those shorts."

Derek just stared with his mouth open, his eyes fixated on my bare thighs. His erection was clearly visible as it grew in his pants after he saw me. I smiled.

"Honestly," the salesgirl said as she took the two pairs of shorts I wasn't wearing up to the counter and led me back into the store, "I figured you would have guy legs and just be into wearing the shorts, I didn't think you'd have legs like that."

"I guess I'll take that as a compliment," I said, feeling more relaxed. Then I turned to Derek, "Hi, I'm Kasey."

Derek stuttered back his name and kept staring at my legs and my ass. It felt good to have a guy get as fumble-tongued as I used to when I'd work up the courage to try to talk to a woman in short shorts.

"Derek likes to wear woman's clothes," the salesgirl told me.

"Shut up! I don't do that!" he shouted at her.

She shrugged and said, "Oh well, my mistake."

Derek took another long look at my legs in my new super short jean cut-offs and then started walking angrily out of the store. I turned back to the salesgirl to pay for my new shorts.

"Derek is really shy and like totally in the closet," she told me. "I could tell he totally digs you, though."

I shrugged and nodded, and she said, "Wait, aren't you going to change back? You aren't going to walk through the mall like that, are you?"

"Yeah," I said with a smirk, "I am."

I walked out feeling proud. I felt annoyed at myself for going out in jeans and then being jealous of girls being able to strut about in shorts getting all that attention. I got looks, and some of them weren't exactly flattering. A group of teenaged boys called me a "fucking pansy" as I walked past them but I didn't stop, I just kept walking.

I found the pretzel stand where Derek worked and saw him behind the counter with a young woman. I walked up and ordered a pretzel from her and then stood there eating it while Derek ignored me. Then I sat down on a bench directly in his view, crossed my legs and slowly ate the pretzel, breaking off pieces and wrapping my tongue around them as I pulled them into my mouth. He tried to look like he didn't notice me, but his eyes stayed on me.

I realized that all the times I had followed a woman around trying to look nonchalantly at her legs that she probably knew, as I did when a man checked me out.

I finished my pretzel and walked over to where Derek was standing inside the kiosk and grabbed a napkin. "Can I borrow your pen?" I asked him.

Looking down and away, he slid a pen across the counter to me. I wrote my name and phone number on the napkin and slid the napkin, along with the pen, back across the counter at him.

"Call me sometime," I told him and walked away, feeling his eyes on my legs and my ass the entire time, until I went around the corner and left the mall.

When I got home there were six messages on my answering machine. One was from J.J. wanting to get together again. Bob had called "just to say hi." There were two messages from guys I didn't know, one wanting to "hook up sometime" and another who said he wanted to buy me a drink. There was a hang-up after some heavy breathing on the fifth message, and the sixth was Derek.

"Hey Kasey, um, this is Derek from the mall. I don't know... like, maybe you want to hang out some time? I know you just left the mall and shit, but, well, I had your number here and I don't know... if you want, you could give me a call. I'm going to be home after like seven o'clock if you want to like call me or something."

It was the most flattering phone message I'd ever gotten. All the other guys were very masculine and sure of themselves, basically telling me they knew I'd give them head after I met them. Derek was like a nervous schoolboy calling a girl he liked for the first time, and I was the girl!

It wasn't yet seven o'clock but I called Derek back at the number he left and got his answering machine. "Hi Derek," I said in my feminine voice, "this is Kasey. I know you said you would be home after seven, but I was about to take a bubble bath and well, I have the rest of the night free. If you're interested, you could come over and we could hang out. Give me a call if you're interested."

I did, in fact, take a bubble bath, and after I was done it was after seven o'clock. I looked at the pile of men's phone numbers next to my bed and smiled. I liked feeling popular after so long as a bashful wallflower.

I thought about all the times I'd waited to hear from a girl I liked and how many times I'd been blown off in favor of someone more handsome or muscular, or for someone who had a flashy car or a lot of money to buy a woman expensive things. I remembered all the times I'd been told, "You're just not my type" or "I think we'd be better off just being friends." Thinking about those experiences kept me from calling any of the other men whose numbers littered the nightstand by my phone. I had told Derek I had the rest of the night free and unless he called me back and said he wasn't interested or couldn't get together that night, I would keep my night free.

When my phone rang, I hoped it was Derek, and not just because I didn't want to tell someone else I was busy that night. When I answered it and said "hello" there was silence on the other end. I said "hello" a second time and Derek said "hello" back quietly.

"Is this Kasey?" he asked.

"Yes, it is."

"This is Derek, from the mall."

"Hi Derek, I'm really glad you called."

"I was wondering if maybe you could come over here. We could watch a movie or something and just hang out?"

"I guess I could do that," I said.

"Could you, like, I dunno, wear high heels and a skirt or something? You know, if you have stuff like that you wear or is it just the shorts, because that would be cool, too."

"I can bring a few different outfits," I told him, smiling. "Is that's okay with you?"

"Oh yeah, that sounds awesome."

I heard a man's voice in the background as Derek gave me directions. I asked who it was and he said it was his roommate.

"He's going out," Derek explained. "He won't be here when you get here."

I wrote down the directions and told Derek I would be there in about a half an hour. He wasn't too far away, but I wanted some time to get my outfits together and fix my hair and makeup. While I got ready there was another call. I let my machine get it and listened as yet another man left a message wanting to meet me.

Derek lived in a house at the end of a very quiet street. As I pulled up in front of the house, a very tall man, at least six-foot six was walking along the road towards a black BMW parked across the street. I waited for him to walk past before getting out of the car in my short shorts. He smiled and winked as he walked by and I pretended I didn't notice.

He got into a car and drove off, and once he was out of sight I got out of my car and walked towards Derek's house. I went up the stairs and knocking on his door. For a moment I worried that he'd punked me and sent me to a random address, but then he came to the door.

"Hi," he said, "glad you found the place okay."

"The big tall guy that just left, he isn't your roommate by any chance is he?" I asked after stepping inside Derek's apartment.

"Yeah, that's Mr. Smith," Derek said.

"Mr. Smith?"

"Yeah, that's what he insists I call him," explained Derek before changing the subject. "Do you want something to drink?"

"Just some soda, or even water if you have that."

"You don't drink?"

"I had a few too many this afternoon," I told him. "Water would be perfect."

Derek went into the kitchen and came back with a glass of water for me and a bottle of beer for himself. There was some kind of action movie playing on his big screen television and the speakers set up around the room made it feel like a movie theatre.

I sat down on the couch and left room for Derek to sit next to me, but he sat down on the recliner across from me after handing me the water.

"Nice set-up," I said as I drank the water. I finished it quickly, not realizing how thirsty I was and Derek immediately offered to bring me another.

"Most of this is Mr. Smith's stuff," Derek explained. "I couldn't afford this shit working at the mall and going to school."

"Where do you go?" I asked, suddenly worried that Derek was in high school or something equally frightening.

He explained he attended the local college and was only able to go part time because he needed to work full time. He said Mr. Smith allowed him to stay at his house rent free as long as Derek "did work around the house like cutting the grass and cleaning and cooking dinner." We talked for a while, and it felt comfortable, sort of like the way it was when I hung out with Bob.

Then Derek asked if I'd put on a skirt and heels for him. I tried on several different combinations before he settled on one he liked, my strappy pink heels and pink miniskirt, which barely covered my ass cheeks when I walked.

"I do love wearing pink," I told him with a smile. I asked him to sit next to me, but he declined, saying he 'liked to watch' and kept looking back and forth between the movie and my legs for the next half hour.

I started to feel lightheaded and tingly all over. I became amused at the goose bumps that were breaking out all over my legs. During a part of the movie when the action heroes went into a dance club and there was music playing, I got up and started dancing, it just felt good. As time passed the buzz I was feeling intensified until I realized this wasn't normal.

"Did you... put something in my drink?" I asked Derek.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 06



"Mr. Smith told me to," Derek explained. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I was afraid you'd say no."

I heard keys turning in the lock for the front door and turned to watch it open. I stood there feeling helpless but very beautiful as I ran my hands over my smooth thighs and looked down at my pink high heels. The door opened and the six-foot six guy I'd seen on the street entered the house carrying a brown paper bag, which he put down on a table by the door before walking towards me.

"Hello, Kasey, I'm Mr. Smith."

"Hi," I said, finding myself looking at him and smiling timidly.

"Derek told me all about you when he got back from the mall today," Mr. Smith said and slid his hand around my waist. "Buying shorts in the women's clothing store and trying them on and then strutting around the mall in them. Oh, my, what a sight that must have been."

I nodded slowly and his hand drifted down over my ass and then under my skirt.

"I think you lack discipline," Mr. Smith told me. All I could think about when he said that was how Hank had spanked me that afternoon.

"He gave me his phone number like nothing," Derek told him. "I didn't even ask."

Looking into my eyes, Mr. Smith said, "And my poor little twink here did the right thing and told me all about it, even though he knew it would probably mean he wouldn't get a piece of you. That's what I mean by discipline, always doing everything you can to please your man. And you definitely need a man."

"I've been with men," I said and reached towards his crotch.

He slapped my hand away and pushed me down on the couch. "I'm sure you have been with men, you greedy bitch. I'm sure you've been with quite a few, prancing around in your little shorts and playing dress up. I wonder if you even know the difference between just doing a man and submitting to a man. Do you?"

"I don't know, sir," I said, looking at and admiring my legs and how they had come to rest on the arm of the couch when I was pushed down.

"Tell him about it, Derek."

"Mr. Smith expects you to do everything he says without question. If you question him, you get punished, and if you defy him then you don't want to know what happens to you. When you do everything you're told and you do it well, then you get rewarded."

My body was tingling and felt incredibly good, which made me feel sexier than ever before. Reclined on the couch, my hands roaming over my body, I looked back and forth between Derek and Mr. Smith trying to understand what they were talking about and just wanting them to touch me.

"Derek has offered you to me in exchange for his freedom," Mr. Smith told me. "Once you are my property, you can only get your freedom by bringing me someone new, and that someone must interest me and be worth my time and effort to train."

My first thought was that I wanted to tell him he was crazy and I wanted no part of this, but when I opened my mouth to speak the only words that came out were, "Am I worth it, sir?"

Mr. Smith laughed. "I can hardly determine that from seeing you sprawled out on my couch fondling yourself, now can I?"

"What do I need to do, sir?"

"First of all," Mr. Smith said with a grin, "you're going to blow Derek. Since he was such a good little twinkie bringing you to me, he deserves a reward. Then you are going to blow me, and after a short little break I'm going to fuck you. After that I'll decide where I want to go from there."

"Sir, I am... a virgin..."

Mr. Smith and Derek both laughed. "I assume you have sucked cock, since you so proudly claimed that you've been with men."

"Yes, I have sucked cock, sir."

"Well, princess, you do realize you have two holes for pleasing men, don't you?"

My fantasies and desires were getting the better of me and shouting down my cautious, rational mind. "Yes sir. Of course, sir."

Mr. Smith told me to stand up and I quickly complied, and once I found my balance in my heels, he ran his hands up under my skirt again, fondling my ass cheeks and then looking at the way my ass looked in just my thong panties. Then he yanked my skirt off and leaned in real close to my ear.

"I am going to have so much fun breaking you..."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 07



Whatever Derek had given me, it lowered my inhibitions and made me very eager to give into my fantasies. The voice inside that told me to run from the situation was getting fainter and while I was somewhat panicked by Mr. Smith's stated intention to "break" me, a larger part of me was intrigued. It wasn't like I hadn't been with men before and it wasn't like I hadn't submitted to them.

I giggled.

"I love making men feel good," I said in a demure, feminine voice.

"That's what I like to hear," smiled Mr. Smith as his hand continued to roam over my exposed ass, occasionally giving it a light squeeze. "You realize that the first time you shaved those legs of yours it was because you wanted men to want you, and not for whatever lame excuse you came up with at the time, don't you?"

"Yes sir."

"And how did you feel when they noticed you in your tight little shorts or your miniskirt and heels?"

"I felt really... sexy."

"I bet you cried the first time you sucked cock, didn't you."

My mind suddenly screamed "GET OUT OF HERE" but my lips trembled and I gasped out, "Yes."

"You cried because your whole life changed in that instant, but you also knew you were always headed in that direction. You were accepting who you are and who you were becoming. You'd fantasized about it for so long in your head but you never told anyone and now your secret was out and the reality was so much better than the fantasies."

"Yes, it was," I gasped.

Mr. Smith removed his hand from my ass and turned to Derek. "Take this bitch in the bathroom and get him ready to get fucked."

Derek led me to the bathroom, where I was flushed out and cleaned, an experience that was embarrassing but somehow arousing. During the experience, Derek didn't speak to me at all until he finished and told me, "It is always good to do that before a date so you'll be ready."

"Thank you, Derek," I said and ran my fingertips along the side of his face.

"Don't thank me," he said with a hint of annoyance. "You're too high right now to realize what I've done to you or what Mr. Smith is planning to do to you."

"He's going to fuck me," I giggled. "I know that."

Derek shook his head and pulled my hand away from his face. "Let's go back to him."

I paused, looked deeply into Derek's eyes and said, "What are you talking about? What is he going to do to me? I've been with a bunch of guys in the past few days and I loved it, so what's the big deal? I want to lose my cherry. I've been fantasizing about it for a long time."

"You aren't thinking straight, Kasey. That's my fault because I dosed you. Mr. Smith takes people like you and me and basically turns them into his slaves. I answered an ad to rent a room when I first came here and that was all I thought it was. Then he found out I was bisexual and liked to wear girl clothes and, well, six months later I'm so desperate to get out that I tricked you into coming here so he'd let me go."

"Why don't you just leave?"

"I don't have time to explain, but you don't just escape. He'll make it fun at first, but then he'll pass you around to all his friends and guys he knows from some website and it just gets worse."

My happy, tingling high that gave me the giggles and made me love touching people and being touched by them was being overcome by a feeling of anxiety and fear. What had I gotten myself into?

"Help me," I whispered, now terrified that Mr. Smith would hear us talking.

Derek pulled me into the back corner of the bathroom and told me, "Don't consent to what he asks you or tells you to do. Refuse to comply. He'll get pissed off and yell at you and tell you to stop fighting and that this is what you want, but stand your ground. He'll get frustrated and mad and yell and maybe even get physical, but he won't take you against your will."

"I don't know if I can—"

"It is up to you, Kasey. Resist and he'll tell you what a rotten cock tease you are and how you are worthless and pathetic, but he'll send you home. Give in and he'll own your ass until you find him someone new to play with."

I could feel my heart racing and my body trembling; I was frightened of the prospect of going back out into the living room and facing Mr. Smith.

Derek took my hand and told me, "Be strong and remember what I said. Once he gives up on you he'll tell me to take you home."

"I'm not strong," I said, starting to cry. "I'm a total wimp."

"You're not a wimp," Derek said as he looked into my eyes. "It took courage to walk through the mall in those shorts. It took courage to walk up to me and give me your phone number. I couldn't have done either of those things. I hide who I am and Mr. Smith uses that to control me. You are a lot stronger than you think you are."

I walked back out to the living room, wearing only my pink thong panties, a t-shirt and my pink heels. Mr. Smith was relaxing on the couch, drinking what appeared to be whiskey with ice cubes. He barely reacted to my return, his face buried in a magazine, but when Derek announced that I had been "properly prepared" he looked up at me and smiled.

"I want to go home," I blurted out.

"Well, Dorothy," Mr. Smith snickered, "you're not in Kansas anymore."

"I am not interested in sex with you," I said, struggling to form words that made sense, but as I did they came out painfully slow and in a hoarse, off-key monotone.

"Oh, really now," said Mr. Smith, laughing at me. "Look at you, standing in front of me in high heels and those slutty panties with your smooth little ass on display after you just let my twinkie get it ready for me... and now you're not interested in sex?"

"No sir, I want to go home."

Mr. Smith laughed heartily. "Kasey, you are prancing around in front of us wearing nothing but a pair of pink thong panties whining about wanting to go home. How stupid do you think I am?"

"I don't think you're stupid, sir. I thought I was coming here to see Derek and hang out with him. If I made a mistake, then I am the stupid one, sir."

"You want to 'hang out' with Derek? Is that what you want, sissy? Well, then get over there and get down on your knees in front of him and 'hang out' if that's what you want."

I looked over to see that Derek had quietly taken off all his clothes while my attention was fixated on Mr. Smith. He had a boyish body and his skin was completely smooth all over, including around his genitals, which were very much on the small side despite Derek's very hard penis.

"What does Kasey look like to you, Derek?" Mr. Smith asked.

Derek sat, frozen in silence until Mr. Smith snapped at him. "I'm sorry Kasey, but you look like a slut that needs discipline."

"Go ahead and stroke yourself," Mr. Smith told Derek. "You know Kasey didn't come over here to do anything other than tease you, don't you? He won't even get on his knees for you."

"I know," Derek muttered as he started stroking his cock.

"No... I didn't mean to—"

"Shut up," Mr. Smith snapped at me. "Don't speak unless I tell you to, cock tease. You don't even know what you want. I bet you've been hooking up with men left and right because you can't get enough cock, and now you come over here wanting to mess with my houseboy's head."

I was about to defend myself when I stopped and remained silent, feeling a powerful compulsion to avoid offending Mr. Smith. He got up and turned me so that my ass, still exposed by the fact that I was only wearing my thong panties, towards the masturbating Derek.

"Let me change into something more comfortable," Mr. Smith said and walked away. He went into his bedroom and closed the door.

As soon as the door closed, I knelt down next to Derek, not to give him head but to whisper to him. "This is our chance, let's get out of here."

"Prove to me you aren't just a tease and a bitch," Derek said, grabbing my arm. "Suck my dick."

"Take me back to my place and I promise I'll give you the best blowjob ever. Please, help me, you said you would."

"Just a little taste... for now, please, Kasey, show me you want me."

"He'll be back soon, though," I said as I moved closer and took his cock in my hand once his hand moved away.

"He's on the phone calling his buddies," Derek said with a moan. "It will take him a while. Just get me started..."

My heart was pounding and I was incredibly nervous but at the same time felt relaxed and my body was tingling in the most pleasant way. I knew it was the drugs, but I couldn't shake myself out of the high, so I leaned in closer until I had Derek's cock inches from my face.

The words came out of me uncontrollably, and as soon as I spoke them I recoiled in horror.

"My gosh, it is so small," I said.

"You fucking bitch," Derek yelled and pushed me off him angrily.

Mr. Smith opened his door and stepped out into the living room looking amused. He was wearing a blue bathrobe and carrying a portable phone.

"Is there is problem, girls? Are we not playing nice?"

"Kasey said my dick was too small for him," Derek told him. "And she wanted me to help her run away."

"Oh my," said Mr. Smith, who then walked over to Derek and tousled his hair. "You always think some prince or princess is going to show up and make all your dreams come true. I think they would call you a hopeless romantic, but I think you know the truth about people, don't you, twinkie? All they want is what they want and the only reason they pretend to care about you is so they can use you."

"I didn't mean it," I whimpered, still on my knees. "That isn't what I meant..."

"Does this meet your high standards, slut?" Mr. Smith asked as he opened his robe and turned towards me, showing an enormous cock that was fully erect and covered with thick veins which appeared to be pulsating.

"Oh shit," I said, the words spilling uncontrollably out of my mouth, "you have an incredibly gorgeous, beautiful, amazing COCK!"

Any self-control I had was melting away as I found myself drooling and staring at Mr. Smith gigantic throbbing cock, which only seemed to get bigger and thicker the more I looked at it.

Derek sat with his arms crossed, looking completely disgusted. I barely even noticed he was there now that I felt hypnotized by what I could not look away from. I was crawling towards Mr. Smith, on my knees, visibly drooling and panting.

Mr. Smith held out his arm, his hand making the sign to "stop" just as I got within arm's reach of him. He turned towards Derek.

"You can feel free to pack up your stuff and hit the road," he told Derek. "I think Kasey will enjoy what I have in mind for him."

"I would like... to watch," Derek said, breathing heavily as he watched how I obediently knelt at Mr. Smith's feet and gazed lustfully at his erection.

"Why don't we all sit down and relax," said Mr. Smith, pulling his robe closed and concealing his cock from my hungry eyes and mouth. He produced what appeared to be a large joint from the pocket of his bathrobe and motioned for me to sit down on the couch. After I got up from the floor and sat down, crossing my legs as I did so, Mr. Smith sat down next to me while Derek took up residence in the large black recliner across from us.

After the joint was lit and had been passed back and forth a few times, I felt Mr. Smith's hand on my thigh. His touch felt wonderful and I felt like I was going to melt from his increasing attention. When he spoke to me, I listened intently, but when he started talking to Derek my attention wandered, distracted by sound and light and various things that decorated the room around me.

"Do you ever wonder why you have so much fight in you?" Mr. Smith asked, abruptly pulling me out of the daze I was in. "Do you ever ask yourself why, when you want something so badly, you have this part of you that always wants to run away?"

"I'm scared," I said as I took another hit off the joint. "I'm so scared of what I want because it isn't just hooking up with an occasional guy. I think I could almost deal with that, but..."

"But you want to be forced to submit to men every day, and not just every day but morning, afternoon and night. Am I right, Kasey?"

"Yes," I sighed as his hand ran gently up and down my thigh and then directed my hand inside the folds of his robe to where his cock was waiting for me.

"You're a princess, Kasey, and I'm going to treat you like one," he whispered into my ear. "You are a prize. You are a trophy and I want to show you off."

"Really?" I asked as I looked down at his cock just as my hand drew it out of the robe.

"Oh yes, Kasey, you look so beautiful all dressed up, especially with those high heels and those long legs. I want to show you off to all my friends."

"You really think so?" I asked and stretched my legs out in front of me to look at them all the way down to my pink toenails.

"Of course I do, Kasey, but I don't want to just show off how sexy you are. I want to show off your sexual talents to all my friends as well. Of course, I want to see just how talented you are so I can tell them all about your amazing skills. Why don't you slide down there on your knees in front of me and show me how you suck a cock."

From the very first time that I went down on a man, the thing I love the most about it was how alive a cock felt when it was hard. It was warm, soft and so unlike anything else I'd ever held or tasted. After my first experience, I was hooked, and while I was so reluctant to admit it, I could not deny that I was absolutely and totally in love with cock.

Once I was on my knees in front of Mr. Smith, still holding onto his amazing cock, I stared longingly at it and then looked up at him and smiled. Then I leaned in and ran my tongue slowly across his balls and then up the powerful veiny shaft of his cock up to the head. My tongue flicked lightly at the underside of his cock head and then I rang my tongue around the edge of it while a slow and honest sound of delight seeped out of me.

In retrospect I believe I would not have been so reluctant to give into my desires and, dare I say it, my need, if I could have come out to people I knew as being gay. I didn't want to date men. I didn't want to have a "boyfriend" and I didn't want to pursue any kind of regular relationship with a man. What I wanted was cock, as much as I could get and as often as possible. I wanted to dress sexy and show off my legs, which even women said were so nice they wished they had legs like mine. I loved being lusted after in my short shorts and in my miniskirts and high heels. Giving in to Mr. Smith, knowing how he planned to share me with his friends and use me for his pleasure, only made my desire grow stronger.

"I want to submit to you completely," I said before sliding the head of his cock into my mouth.

Mr. Smith smiled and ran his fingers through my hair before gently pulling my head down. Derek had moved over to sit on the arm of the couch, watching closely while stroking himself.

When people talk about finding their true love and having that first kiss that set off emotions they'd never felt before, I always think about the first time I felt the head of a hard cock between my lips. The powerful but sensitive texture of it as it passed between my lips and my tongue ran over it as it slid deeper into my mouth and rubbed along the roof of my mouth and down into my throat, I felt myself falling in love.

Mr. Smith's cock was filling my mouth, and I wrapped my lips tightly along his thick, veiny shaft as it slipped deeper into me until it found my throat. I gagged slightly, looked up at Mr. Smith for his reaction, and then slowly moved my head up, working his shaft with my lips and tongue as I did so.

I felt myself writhing in total ecstasy as my head bobbed up and down on Mr. Smith's cock, moving not only up and down but moving ever so slightly around and around as I sucked him.

Then he lifted my head up and off his cock, looked into my eyes and said, "I want that ass, that sweet virgin ass..."

I felt so happy my smile stretched from one ear to the other, especially after I stood up and looked down at my legs and slowly slid my thong panties down my thighs, my calves, and then over my high heeled shoes and off completely.

Mr. Smith sat me down on the couch and then leaned me back so I was lying face up. He removed his robe and went to the paper bag he'd brought with him when he arrived. He pulled a condom out of the bag and quickly pulled it on over his hard cock. He covered it with some kind of lubricating jelly. Then he came back to the couch and positioned himself between my legs. He took hold of my legs by gripping them behind the knee and pushed them back so my feet were over my head and apart.

I felt the head of his cock press against my asshole. He pushed slowly back and forth against it until quite suddenly his cock head popped into my asshole. He let out a sigh almost as loud as the one I released and pushed his cock hard into me. It sank into me slowly, and I could feel every inch taking me as he continued pushing relentlessly until every last inch of his massive cock was inside me.

I moaned loudly and without pause throughout his first penetration. Although it did hurt, and it hurt more than I imagined it would, it felt so good and so right. I uncontrollably turned towards my left leg and started kissing it while I continued moaning.

And then Mr. Smith started pulling out of me. My moaning got louder to the point I was all but screaming. And when he had pulled back as far as he could without withdrawing completely he pushed it into me again. He continued pushing in and pulling out over and over until my ass had gotten used to his very welcome intrusion and he was able to move back and forth inside me with relative ease. Every few thrusts or so, my ass would suddenly tighten and clench around his cock and then release it, and soon that became my favorite part of my first anal experience.

At some point early in Mr. Smith's thrusting, I felt a warm liquid splash across my face. Derek, who had been watching and had taken roost on the arm of the sofa by my head, had stroked himself to orgasm and shot his load on my face.

All I could do was turn and look at him, my mouth agape, moaning loudly as Mr. Smith started pounding me harder and harder with every thrust.

"You deserve what's coming to you, slut," Derek said, sounding both angry and disappointed.

Derek walked away. He grabbed his clothes off the floor, then went into a bedroom and closed the door behind him.

I turned my head back and looked up at Mr. Smith, smiling and groaning as he fucked me, holding me down with one leg pushed up against the back of the couch and the other flailing about wildly out over the coffee table. I couldn't believe how good I felt. The pain seemed to have melted away into a fog of ecstasy. I reached up and grabbed hold of Mr. Smith's powerful biceps and watched his face twisting in a way that told me he was thoroughly enjoying fucking me.

As much as sucking cock had been a revelation on the level of falling in love for the first time, this was ten times better. I could feel tears streaming down the sides of my face and my moans were very loud, but I couldn't control or stop either.

My legs started shaking and I reached down to feel my dick, expecting it to be hard but finding it completely and utterly limp. Yet, I felt like my body did whenever I reached orgasm. It was better than my usual orgasm, as my whole body seemed to be in the throes of ecstasy, but at the same time the final release seemed so distant and unobtainable.

"Fuck me," I started yelling between my loud moans. "FUCK me!"

He started slamming me harder and I felt the hugeness of his cock filling me and alternatively pushing me open and then letting me close just to be opened again. My body twitched and seized, hanging on the edge of orgasm for what felt like forever before my entire body erupted.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 07



"YES! YES! YES!" I screamed at the top of my lungs as a shockwave of a seizure washed violently through my body. I collapsed, exhausted, my arms and legs falling limp at my side.

Mr. Smith kept fucking me, slowly at first after my orgasm, but then he picked up the pace. Soon he was fucking me hard and fast again, but I was no longer moaning loudly. I was crying, with my sobs now very audible, and I was fighting to catch my breath.

I felt exhausted and made feeble attempts to push at Mr. Smith and tried to beg him to stop, but the only thing that came out of my mouth were hoarse and pathetic gasps. He kept fucking me, pounding away at me while my limp body flopped about helplessly.

Then I started to feel an unexpected sensation. My body was starting to tense up again. My anus was gripping and releasing Mr. Smith's cock with newfound enthusiasm. Even though I was completely exhausted and weak, my body was responding to Mr. Smith's attentions by actively building towards a second orgasm.

My feeble attempts to push Mr. Smith off me grew more intense and pathetic. My limp arms flailed at him, failing to make my point as my hands slapped weakly against his chest. The intensity of the sensations inside me was growing stronger and I cried out in mental agony, the result of a feeling of terror that my body simply could not stand another orgasm.

I hadn't even noticed that two men had come into the room. They had probably walked through the front door, but the intensity of the fucking I was getting from Mr. Smith had given me a kind of tunnel vision that gradually closed out everything else around me aside from my immediate environment.

The two men, who I came to know later as Pedro and Jake, hovered around over me, watching me getting my long overdue first fucking while casually drinking beer. After a long swig of beer, Pedro put the bottle down and grabbed my right ankle. He started undoing the straps of my high heels, and as he did so he brought my foot up to his mouth and started kissing and licking it.

"Look at those pretty pink toenails," he said as he looked down at me, "they look just like cotton candy."

Jake muttered something to Pedro along the lines of, "you and your freaky foot fetish," and continued to watch as Mr. Smith hammered away at my ass and Pedro removed my shoes.

Pedro ran his tongue up and over the arch of my foot, causing me to quiver in a new and different way, and when he started slowly sucking on each of my toes I moaned out a string of words that didn't seem to fit together at all.

"Damn, Smith, you really upgraded this time, huh?" Jake muttered at Mr. Smith.

My body began seizing again, and I found myself helplessly grabbing at my limp penis. It felt so tiny compared to the huge cock pumping away inside my ass. Completely hard it was just over four inches long. All shriveled up a wet, the way it was now, it felt like one of those miniature hot dogs that come in a can.

My body seized and stopped, then seized again and stopped again. It continued like that for what felt like an hour but was likely only a few minutes. It was like I was close to a full body orgasm, beginning from where Mr. Smith was fucking me and radiating through my body, and then it was like my body quit and simply collapsed. Pedro kept sucking on my toes the entire time.

Finally, my body seized up more powerfully than before and didn't collapse. It just kept seizing with the sensation growing stronger as I moaned loudly and yelled out and sobbed uncontrollably while my entire body shook violently.

At the same time, Mr. Smith pulled out of my ass, ripped off his condom and shot a huge load of cum across my stomach and the backs of my thighs. "Oh yeah! Fuck yeah!" he moaned out as he ejaculated on me.

He released his hands from my legs and I fell lifelessly off the couch and onto the floor. I was physically, mentally and emotionally drained and just wanted to lie there, but I wasn't done for the evening.

"Who's got next?" Mr. Smith asked his friends.



Kasey's Confession Ch. 08



I woke up the next morning feeling incredibly sore all over. I was lying on the couch in Mr. Smith's living room, covered up with a blanket, with only vague memories of what had happened after Mr. Smith finished fucking me. I knew Pedro and Jake had taken turns with me as I had flashes of memory, almost like photographs, of them putting me in different positions and forcing themselves into me. I remembered them laughing and having a great time doing whatever they wanted with my limp and almost lifeless body.

The house was quiet, so much so that I wondered if anyone was home. Sitting up was difficult, but I managed to do even as my body felt as exhausted as it was sore. I looked around for my clothes, as I was completely naked under the blanket, and spotted my skirt, panties and shirt folded up in a pile on the seat of the recliner with my shoes on the floor beside it. 

I thought about leaving, but in my current condition, coupled with only having the clothes on the recliner to wear made doing so seem a lost cause. I looked for any sign of my sneakers and shorts, the ones I had worn to meet Derek, or the other outfits I had brought to change into for him but didn't see them anywhere.

Looking at the clock, I suddenly realized it was Monday morning and according to the clock on the wall I was already two hours late. Spotting a telephone on an end table, I walked over to it, very gingerly on my rubbery legs, and dialed the phone number for my employer.

After apologizing for not calling earlier, I told my boss I had been sick all night and overslept. I felt relieved when he told me to "take care of" myself and take the day off. Once I hung up, the door to Mr. Smith's room opened and he came out.

"Ah, the sick call," he said with a laugh when he saw me hanging up the phone. "Those are going to become a lot more common now that you're my sissy."

I had a sudden urge to throw up, but it passed. "I need to go home, Mr. Smith. I don't feel very good."

"First of all," Mr. Smith said, putting his hand under my chin and lifting my head up so I was looking into his eyes, "you need to make me coffee and then make me breakfast. Then, after you take a shower, you are going to put on those shorts you brought yesterday along with a special t-shirt I bought for you and we're going to take a little trip."

He handed me a short black satin bathrobe and told me to put it on. I wanted to resist and insist he take me home, but all the only words that came out of my mouth were a very meek "yes sir" and I put on the robe and made my way to the kitchen and started the coffee.

"I'd like scrambled eggs with bacon and some white toast with light butter," he told me as he came up behind me and squeezed my ass. "Feel free to make some for yourself, princess."

I started the bacon in a frying pan and was about to start scrambling the eggs when Mr. Smith squeezed my bare ass cheek again, leaning in to breathe into my ear and say, "You are a great fuck, Kasey. I think I want to fuck you again after breakfast."

"Please, sir," I replied very meekly, "I don't think I could handle it."

"Is that right?" Mr. Smith snapped, grabbing my arm and turning me around. "If I say I want to fuck you, then I will fuck you. Is that understood?"

I started to protest, but all that came out of me was an unintelligible stutter and I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. I tried wiping them away, but within several seconds I was crying uncontrollably.

"I'm very proud of you, princess," Mr. Smith said as he put his hand on my face and wiped away my tears with his thumb. "Your first time and you took three in the ass, not to mention you are incredibly orgasmic. That is so sexy."

Through my tears I confessed, "I always had trouble getting it up when I was with women. I couldn't get off most of the time and they'd keep saying it was okay... it was okay... it was okay..."

"It wasn't okay, Kasey," Mr. Smith told me. "Now that you know what you are, you must understand that, don't you?"

"Yes," I said, biting my lower lip.

"You disappointed those poor women with your limp little dick. You probably moved like a woman trying to satisfy them and failed every time because you didn't know how to be a man. That's okay, though, because you know how to please a man."

I nodded.

"We can wait on your next fuck," he said, holding my head up. "For now let's just have some breakfast."

"Okay," I said and realized I had forgotten to turn the bacon. It was starting to burn, but I caught it in time, made the eggs and brought two plates over to the table with cups of coffee for Mr. Smith and myself.

"We are going to go shopping so we can make your bedroom suitable for you," Mr. Smith said as we ate. "I think it should reflect your personality and your new life."

"Sir, what about my apartment?"

"I will take care of that. Whatever you don't need we'll put into storage and what we both agree you do need we'll move in here."

I swallowed hard, realizing how serious Mr. Smith was about the situation and trying to determine if it was really what I wanted. My reluctance was greatly diminished but fear had become the emotion that fought my desire to give in.

Looking back I knew I could have still walked out that morning and never looked back. Mr. Smith probably wouldn't have followed me and would have moved on to his next source of amusement and pleasure. While I sipped my coffee I looked at him and around the room at the well decorated house with its big screen television and ultra-modern appliances and knew Mr. Smith could afford to buy me any clothes or shoes I desired. I thought about all the benefits available to me compared to hiding away in my apartment working my ten dollar an hour job saving up for a new pair of heels.

Then I thought about the other benefits, finished my breakfast and got down on my knees in front of Mr. Smith.

"If it pleases you, sir, I would like to get in the habit of sucking cock after breakfast."

"Clear the table and take a shower," Mr. Smith said in a matter of fact manner. He went over to the paper bag he'd brought home the previous night and pulled a t-shirt out of it. "Wear this along with those shorts you brought."

The t-shirt was black with the word "Princess" written across it in pink and silver script. I took it from him, thanked him and did as he told me.

To most people it probably sounds crazy, or at least inconceivable, that I stayed. I wasn't fooled into thinking I was getting into something other than what it was. For me it was very exciting. It felt like an acceptance of who I was and my deepest desires. With all the men I had calling me at home, I would have had ample opportunity to have regular hook ups, but with Mr. Smith it became something more. Having him take charge and becoming submissive to his whims and desires made my experience feel more complete. 

After my shower I put on the "princess" t-shirt, my new girlie shorts and put on lace topped ankle socks with my sneakers. The first thing I thought of was how I wished I had pink sneakers instead of my bland white ones, which were men's tennis shoes. I would get my wish later in the day when Mr. Smith took me out and spoiled me by spending lots of money on clothes, shoes and feminine accents for my new bedroom.

The first thing we did after I showed and got dressed was to pay a visit to the neighbors across the street. Mr. Smith referred to them as a "very open-minded couple" he wanted to introduce me to.

Walking across the street in my shorts and "princess" t-shirt I felt more relaxed and confident than I ever had walking out in public before. Mr. Smith told me the neighborhood was "safe" and he "made sure it stayed that way." I later learned he once owned every house on the street, a small side street with seven houses on it, and either rented them to or sold them to people he referred to as "enlightened."

Glenn and Nancy were a married couple in their forties. They greeted us at the door together in a very friendly manner. We followed them inside, and as we did I could not help but notice Nancy was wearing a rather short pair of jean cut-offs with flip-flops. Her legs, however, were very big around, and most people would have said they were fat. Glenn was suffering from a very advanced balding situation but didn't try to hide it, nor did he try to hide his sizable beer belly.

"Well, Mr. Smith, you certainly seemed to have upgraded," Glenn said as we were sitting down. "Not that I didn't appreciate Derek, but Princess here certainly is a looker."

"I hope she's eager to please," added Nancy.

"Very eager," Mr. Smith told her.

"I would love to do up your makeup for you," Nancy said after turning towards me. "I'm a cosmetologist so I do it for a living and you have a naturally pretty face, so imagine what you could look like with some help."

"I would like that very much," I replied, "thank you, ma'am."

"Of course, you will have to work for it," she said. "Come over here beside me on the sofa."

I made my way over to the sofa and sat where she motioned me to by patting the cushion with her hand. Then she kicked off her flip-flops and stretched her big legs across my lap.

"I hope you know how to give a good foot massage," she said.

"I can try," I said quietly.

As I slowly put my hands around her right foot, which she dragged across my thigh while bending her knee, I felt my dick getting hard in my pants. I'd given a woman a foot massage once or twice before but had never gotten aroused by it. When I put my hands around Nancy's foot and felt how rough and calloused it was, something triggered an unexpected response.

It only got worse when Nancy started poking around under the bottom of my shorts with the toes of her left foot and started rubbing up against my erection, which had ended up being bent into an uncomfortable position because I was sitting in such tight shorts.

Somehow she managed to pop it loose and when it sprang free from my shorts she started laughing. "Oh wow, now THAT is what I call a teeny weenie. I bet not many girls called you for a second date."

Mr. Smith and Glenn started laughing along with her.

"I'm surprised any girl called him for a FIRST date," Glenn said, laughing heartily.

My eyes started tearing up as I remembered how I always had trouble convincing women to go out with me and how many of them had dumped me either after the first date or after the first time we slept together.

"Talk about having to fake orgasm," Nancy snickered as she stroked my dick with her toes, "with this one you'd have to fake realizing it was even IN."

"Great legs, though," chimed in Glenn. "I could get used to seeing those around the neighborhood on a regular basis."

"And how about kneeling in front of you?" Mr. Smith asked him.

"No doubt."

I quietly moaned while Nancy rubbed her big toe up and down the length of my penis, trying to continue massaging her other foot, and then she began rubbing the underside of the head of my dick with her calloused big toe while pushing it back against my body. The rubbing was so intense, and it had been so long since anyone had touched my penis other than myself, that I could not help but enjoy it. I looked at her calloused big feet and up at her big, fat legs, and thought to myself that she was disgusting and how dare she make fun of me.

Yet, when the intensity of her toe's rubbing of my penis' most sensitive spot, my moans became spaced out by long, deep breaths and I yelled out, "You have such beautiful feet! I love your feet!" Then I pulled her right foot, the one I had been trying to massage, up to my mouth and started kissing it passionately just as my orgasm reached critical and I ejaculated into the air.

Even after I came, I continued kissing her foot and panting until Glenn appeared in front of me, naked from the waist down. He grabbed my head, his wife pulled her feet back, and he pushed me down on the floor in front of him.

"Suck me, sissy boy," he said and shoved his cock towards my mouth.

I didn't hesitate. I smiled and opened my mouth, slowly sliding the length of his cock from the tip down to the base without pausing. As I slid my mouth back and forth I looked up at Glenn to see him smiling down at me.

"You know your place, don't you princess?"

"Yes," I gasped as I took his cock in my hand as my mouth came off it and began licking hungrily at his balls.

"Look at you go," I heard Nancy's voice say from behind me as I slid her husband's cock back into my drooling mouth. "You are a nasty, nasty cocksucker."

I was giving the noisiest blowjob I'd ever given, moaning and chirping and attempting to speak with my mouth completely full. I'd go back and forth between "mmm" sounds and "aah" sounds as I looked back and forth between Glenn towering above me and his wife crouching next to me.

Grinning broadly and speaking in a tone that made it sound like she pitied me Nancy brushed my hair back from my face and leaned in closer. "You love that cock, don't you pretty girl?" she whispered in my ear.

I looked over at her, moving just my eyes so I could see her face while my head moved back and forth over Glenn's cock. Her smile and look of satisfaction and enjoyment as she watched me was an incredible turn-on. Even though I was giving her husband head and not so much as touching Nancy, it felt like I was giving her great sexual pleasure on a level I had never given a woman before.

It was only a few minutes before Glenn tensed up and he shot his hot, thick load into my mouth. Nancy grabbed my head as her husband pulled out, held my mouth closed and told me to swallow "like a good girl." Once I managed to get it down, she released her hands from my face and I impulsively lurched towards her and kissed her on the mouth.

She slapped me.

"What the fuck was that?" She asked after she recovered from the shock. "Are you trying to tell me you love me or something?"

I stuttered and looked down at the floor, not expected such a violent response. I had felt driven by emotion and desire after spending time with Nancy and her husband, but I was drawn so strongly to Nancy. It wasn't like the uncontrollable sexual desire I felt for men. It was more of an emotional thing. I didn't feel attracted to men on anything but a purely sexual basis, but Nancy had awoken feelings in me I had felt for women in the past. In my mind I hoped that she would be my "girlfriend," despite being married, even as I knew the feeling was completely irrational.

Mr. Smith came over and put his hands on my shoulders from behind and looked down on me from above. "Kasey, you need to stop being impulsive and doing what you are told and ONLY what you are told. Now, apologize to Ms. Nancy."

"I'm sorry, Ms. Nancy. Please forgive me."

"Aw," she said, shaking her head and smiling, "poor cocksucker just needs some love. Why don't you get yourself together and I'll give you that makeover. That is, if it is okay with you, Mr. Smith."

"We have some time," he told her. "I'd like him to look pretty for our little shopping trip."

When Nancy brought me into the bathroom and laid out her vast array of beauty paraphernalia I was immediately speechless. Once I had taken in all the tricks of her trade, I found myself feeling really good about not only the makeover but about being alone with Nancy.

"I really enjoyed watching you suck Glenn's cock," she told me as she started working on my face. "You have so much enthusiasm and skill. It must have come so naturally for you when you started. I would bet money that your only regret after your first time was that you wish you had started sooner."

I nodded quietly.

"Do you have any guy friends? I mean regular guy friends who don't know about this side of you?"

"Maybe one or two," I told her quietly. "There are guys I work with, but I'm not really friends with them outside of work."

"You should let them meet the real you," Nancy told me.

"I think I'd freak them out."

"Sweetie, with those gorgeous legs of yours and your eagerness to give head, I think they'd get over the freaked out part pretty quickly. You'd probably be surprised at how many of them would take advantage of what you have to offer."

It took almost two hours for Nancy to finish her makeover of my hair and face. She had started and stopped and started over so many times I'd lost count. By the time she was done I was looking in the mirror at someone I barely recognized as myself. The blue and black eye makeup she used brought out the color of my blue eyes, the foundation and blush softened my face to where it looked incredibly feminine. There was so much to look at, not to mentioned how cute my long hair looked in pigtails, that I just kept saying "Oh gosh" over and over again.

"And the lipstick is very special," Nancy told me. "It is a no smear and no smudge lipstick that should keep on truckin' even after you've spent the day sucking cock."

Nancy had given me a manicure with long fingernails painted hot pink with just a hint of glitter when you turned them the right way under the lights. After I looked at the whole picture of myself in the mirror I turned towards her and threw my arms around her.

"I love you," I blurted out as I hugged her and she tried to push me off.

"Calm down," she snapped after getting me off her. "You make me sick when you say shit like that and touch me without permission. Someone needs to teach you about respect."

"I'm sorry, I just..."

"You just think you're in love with me because I got you off with my big toe and you sucked my husband's dick? How pathetic are you?"

"Don't be mad, I'm just trying to explain my feelings."

"Feelings? You just met me and I made fun of your teenie little weenie, which IS pathetic by the way, and you got off because I was touching it with my toes. Then you SUCKED my husband's COCK and I gave you this makeover so you could go out and look pretty and now you LOVE me? Get a fucking clue."

Mr. Smith was standing in the door as she finished yelling at me. He looked at me and then at her and asked, "My sissy princess here giving you trouble, Nancy?"

"He tried telling me he loved me. Can you believe that one?"

Mr. Smith laughed. "Poor little Kasey, I bet you always chased after women that were out of your league. Well guess what Kasey? All women are out of your league. What the hell would a woman want from you anyway?"

I stood speechless, holding back tears because I didn't want my makeup to get ruined.

"Well, apologize to the lady and let's get going. Your makeover took so long that Glenn and I went out for lunch and we just got back." He stopped, saw how upset I was and told me, "You look very beautiful, Kasey. Men are going to eat you up today. Now, apologize to Ms. Nancy."

"I'm sorry, Ms. Nancy."

"Say it like you mean it, princess. Kneel down in front of her and apologize again."

I knelt down and apologized again, repeating the words over and over and begging her to accept my apology.

"I accept your apology," she told me after my begging became too pathetic for even her to bear. "Now go out and have fun with your master. Hopefully he can teach you a thing or two about respect."

"By the way, Kasey," Nancy said before I left with Mr. Smith, "have fun today and stay out of trouble."

Going out shopping with Mr. Smith gave me a feeling of being protected and safe. He was a big man, six and a half feet tall with a thick, strong body. He wasn't built like a bodybuilder the way J.J. was, his was more a natural strength with big arms and powerful legs like tree trunks. Aside from his size and strength he was an attractive man who dressed and groomed himself to reflect his wealth and social status. He ran and owned several companies, although he rarely spent an entire day at any of his businesses, preferring to stay home and dictate to his partners and employees over the telephone.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 08



The feeling of protection Mr. Smith gave me, coupled with the makeover that I thought made me easily mistaken for a biological woman, allowed me to relax as we hit stores buying clothes and items for my room. It wasn't until we entered a shoe store, one Mr. Smith insisted was the best for finding shoes in my size, that the day became more than just a girl out shopping with her man.

Of course, it was more than just that. I drew a lot of stares and Mr. Smith encouraged me to flirt with men as we shopped. If they looked at me, I smiled. If they smiled, I winked. It was awkward at first, but with Mr. Smith at my side no one tried to hit on me or start a conversation with me. They just looked and I felt like the most beautiful girl in a fairyland kingdom.

The shoe store was a little hole in the wall kind of place with the entrance on a side street that was little more than an alley. Except for an old style neon sign reading "SHOES" there was no real indication there was even a store there.

The shoes were all in larger sizes. There was almost nothing on the racks smaller than a size eight. Most of the shoes were size ten and larger with a rather wide selection of high heeled shoes in sizes larger than a twelve. It was a store that catered to girls like me.

The shopkeeper was Pedro, the man I'd met the previous night during my unexpected anal session with three men. I remembered him being especially fond of my feet but barely remembered having him inside of me.

"Don't you look pretty today," Pedro said as I came into the store. "Shame about the sneakers though," he added while making a pouty face, "I can't see those sexy feet of yours."

"Well, my pet cocksucker here is looking to acquire some new shoes, and she'll need some help trying them on," Mr. Smith replied.

All day I had been like a kid in a candy store, shopping for girl clothes and feminine accents for my new bedroom. I barely gave any thought at all to going back to my old, mundane and lonely life. Shoes were like the ultimate candy for me. I loved wearing high heels and how they made me look.

As Pedro helped me try on the first pair of heels I'd selected, he fondled my bare feet while going on about how beautiful they were. I reacted as I'd come to learn to react, by appreciating the attention and loving the fact that a man could get enjoyment from my body.

There had been a man outside on the street before we entered the store. He had been looking me up and down and smiling at me. I flirted with him as Mr. Smith insisted I do whenever a man showed any interest in me. As Pedro was sliding my new high heels on my feet, he entered the store along with another man.

"May I help you with something?" asked Pedro.

"We're just... looking."

It was obvious what they were looking at was me. They pretended to look at shoes on the racks, mostly from a limited collection of men's shoes, but their eyes stayed on me the entire time. I could hear them talking about me in low tones until finally they addressed Mr. Smith.

"So, we're just wondering. Is that a guy or a girl?"

"Does it matter?" Mr. Smith asked.

"Well, we were just curious."

"Kasey is too pathetic to be a man," Mr. Smith told them, "but if you guys are interested in getting a blowjob you came to the right place."

The two men laughed and they talked back and forth with Mr. Smith for a few minutes while I kept trying on shoes. At one point, Pedro jumped into their conversation and told them, "You can use my back storeroom."

The man I'd seen outside walked over and stood beside me, looking down as Pedro removed the shoes I had been trying on. "Let's go," he said and pointed towards the storeroom.

Pedro stood up and backed away and I followed the man to the storeroom without question. Once we stepped inside, he unbuckled and pulled down his pants unceremoniously and I dropped down to my knees in front of him without hesitation.

I opened my mouth and immediately it was filled with cock. My new friend didn't care much for subtlety or foreplay. He jammed his cock into my mouth and forced it all the way in. He was of average size, so I barely gagged at all, but then he grabbed my head on both sides and just fucked my face hard and fast while calling me "cocksucker" and "faggot" and my favorite, "Tinkerbell."

When he finally came, my neck felt stiff and tight from the rough handling, and I collapsed face first towards him after choking down his cum. I struggled to get my balance while he laughed and muttered something about me staying there so his friend could "get some."

I would end up sucking seven cocks in that storeroom that afternoon. Pedro would end up calling four of his friends to take advantage of what I was offering and then he would finish helping me pick out and try on shoes before taking me back in the storeroom and putting me back to work.

By the third cock I had started feeling completely repulsed by what I was doing, and when the fourth man entered the storeroom I had made a motion to run. He calmly placed me back down on my knees. Seeing how stressed and upset I had become, my fourth cock's owner gently reminded me of my place.

"You're a cocksucker, sweetie. Now settle down and suck," he told me as he pushed his hard cock into my face. I wrapped my lips around it, ran my tongue around its crown, and began sucking. I didn't stop until I'd swallowed my fourth load of the afternoon.

When the fifth man came into the room, I smiled meekly at him and began sucking him immediately. I was grateful for the pillow I was kneeling on, more so with each man I performed oral sex upon. When I had started my "suck shift" in the storeroom, Mr. Smith had told me when I was good I could kneel on a pillow and when I did wrong, or disappointed him, I would have to kneel on a hard floor or bare concrete.

After sucking off the sixth man and swallowing his load, Mr. Smith came into the storeroom and helped me to get back on my feet.

"You're going to suck off Pedro before we leave," he told me, "but first he wants to play with your feet some more."

"Yes sir."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 09



I sat quietly in Mr. Smith's car on the ride home from our shopping trip. The events at the shoe store weighed heavily on my mind. The realization that I had just sucked off seven men in a storeroom was making me feel sick to my stomach. What made me even more nauseous was the fact that I had enjoyed it.

"You are quite the prize," Mr. Smith told me as he drove. "I think you are going to be my best pet ever."

I lurched forward and begged Mr. Smith to stop the car. When he did I opened the passenger side door and threw up on the roadway. When I was done, I tried to pull myself together but I had started crying again and my lower lip was quivering as I apologized to Mr. Smith for having gotten sick.

"It's okay, princess," Mr. Smith told me. "You're still coming to terms with who you really are. Society pushes the idea that sex is some mystical blessed experience between two people who want to spend their whole lives together. What it really is, well, it should be fun and it shouldn't be seen as bad. You made all those men feel really good. And it made you feel good, being able to satisfy them all while getting to experience having so much cock all at once. Focus on that."

I sat quietly, trying to collect myself and pulled down the visor to block the sun but also to access the mirror attached to it. My makeup was smeared quite a bit but overall I still looked very beautiful.

"What you need is to truly accept that you are a sissy whose true pleasure is in being submissive to men," Mr. Smith went on to say. "If you were getting this much pussy then your friends would think you were a hero. Do you have any close friends?"

"A couple," I conceded.

"Do they know you like to dress up and pleasure men?"

"No," I said. "They wouldn't understand."

Mr. Smith pulled the car into the driveway and put his hand on my knee. "I think it is time they met the real you."

"Please, no," I stammered. 

"It was Ms. Nancy's idea. Do you really want to disappoint Ms. Nancy?"

"I can't do that... please, don't make me, I'm begging you, please..."

"You have no idea how much it turns me on when you start crying, do you Kasey? I'm going to have to insist you invite your two friends over for dinner tonight. Then they can meet the real you and you can make and serve them a delicious dinner."

At Mr. Smith's insistence I called my two friends, one at a time, and very nervously invited them over for dinner. I told them I'd moved from my apartment into a house and I was making dinner to celebrate. One of them, Jeff, was a co-worker, who asked why I hadn't been at work that day. I told Jeff I had been tired from the move and took the day off. My other friend, Chris, was someone I rarely saw but who lived in town. We had had been friends since high school and for the past year had been constantly making and breaking plans.

I was surprised when both agreed to come over. After I hung up with Chris, Mr. Smith had me start dinner. Then I changed into one of the new super short miniskirts I'd bought and put on one of my new pairs of high heels, which had laces that wrapped up and around my calves. Mr. Smith gave me a new t-shirt, which was pink and had written across the front "Slut." I tried to talk him out of having me wear it, but his response was to have me put on a C-cup bra we had bought along with foam inserts that simulated breasts. Reluctantly, I pulled the t-shirt over the bra and finished dinner.

Glenn and Nancy came over for dinner as well, and Nancy helped me to fix my makeup before my friends arrived. As the time got later and I knew my only two friends in the world were going to show up any minute and see me dressed the way I was, I started shaking uncontrollably.

"I can't do this," I said, turning to Mr. Smith. "Please, let me change into my regular clothes..."

"Those ARE your regular clothes. I spent hundreds of dollars on you today. Are you ungrateful?"

Nancy put her hand on my arm and told me, "If they really are your friends, they'll accept you the way you really are."

When the doorbell rang I tried to pull away from Nancy, who grabbed my wrist tightly. I struggled and whined about wanting to hide and how I couldn't do this. Mr. Smith went to the door and opened it while I stood back, now completely frozen in horror.

"Hi," said my friend Jeff after Mr. Smith opened the door. "Is this Kasey's place?"

"Well, it is my place, but Kasey lives here. Come on in."

Jeff walked in and looked around. When his eyes fell on me he blurted out "Holy shit." I had known Jeff for two years and we had hung out quite a few times. Usually we hung out in a bar and watched sports on television or hung out at each other's apartments watching a movie or just talking about everyday things. I considered him my friend because I spent more time with him than anyone else I knew and our relationship was fairly normal. I had never so much as hinted at my "other" life to him and this caught him completely off-guard.

I stood frozen in front of Jeff as he slowly walked towards me. My legs were shaking as I stood there in my miniskirt and heels avoiding eye contact with my friend.

"So, I guess he never told you he was a cocksucker," Nancy said while watching Jeff looking at me. He seemed as shocked as I was mortified.

"Uh, no," Jeff said as his eyes looked up from my legs to my face. "Although I always kind of suspected," he added with a smile.

"Jeff, I'm not, I don't, I... I... I..."

"So, what is this?" Jeff asked, turning to look at Nancy, then at Mr. Smith and then at Glenn. "Kasey said it was dinner?"

"Yes, Kasey made dinner tonight for you and another friend of his," Mr. Smith told him. "He wanted his friends to see who he really was."

"Please, Jeff, don't say anything to anyone at work—"

"Seriously?" he said, cutting me off. "I don't think I could NOT say anything about this shit."

I kept pleading, and heard myself getting more pathetic the longer I went on protesting and making claims that I wasn't really like this, that it was just a game, and that he was supposed to be my friend and have my back. 

"We hung out a few times, Kasey. It isn't like we're anything more than that. To be honest, when we first hung out I kind of felt sorry for you because you were always so quiet and no one talked to you and never seemed to have a girlfriend or any friends. When you invited me over to dinner and told me you moved into a house I wasn't sure what was up, but I was curious. You do have some kick ass legs, though. You should have been a chick with those."

"Kasey talks about you all the time," lied Nancy. "I think he likes you. Or is it better if I say 'she likes you'?"

The doorbell rang and I tensed up. Mr. Smith went to the door while Nancy held onto my arm. Glenn remained silent, looking amused by what was happening, and Jeff just stood there with his eyes moving very obviously down to look at my legs.

"You must be Chris," Mr. Smith said as he opened the door. "We've been expecting you, come on in."

Chris looked over at me and stopped. He did not seem all that surprised, but the revealing way in which I was dressed and the "Slut" written across the fake boobs I was sporting gave him pause. He had known me for a long time, and had often been the recipient of my "straight crossdresser" speeches after he learned I shaved my legs and saw me out dressed as a woman on Halloween. Seeing me dressed wasn't that shocking, but the situation probably was.

Mr. Smith introduced everyone and then walked towards me with Chris at his side, "And of course, you know my, oh, so submissive, sissy girl Kasey."

"Hi, Kasey," Chris said. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised. This was probably a long time coming, you know?"

I quietly nodded, making only brief eye contact with the man I considered my only real friend. I felt embarrassed and humiliated standing in front of him dressed the way I was while Mr. Smith told him what a submissive sissy I was.

All I could think about was how the thing I'd kept telling myself as I submitted to Mr. Smith was that this was a fantasy life and I could leave it and go back to my ordinary life any time I wanted. Seeing the only two people I considered my friends here at Mr. Smith's, seeing me dressed up the way I was and waiting for me to serve them dinner permanently changed that thought. Jeff would almost certainly tell the tale at work the following day, and everyone I'd known since high school was connected to me through Chris, so my days of secrecy were about to end.

I was shuffled off to the kitchen to finish getting dinner ready and bring it out to the table. I took a deep breath once I had everything together and started carrying the food out to the dining room.

Everyone was talking and laughing and when I started putting the food down on the table, Mr. Smith snapped at me to bring everyone a drink. I ended up rushing back and forth, carrying bottles of beer and a glass of wine for Nancy, then going back to get the rest of the food out while Mr. Smith snapped at me to "stop dawdling."

My friends watched as I started to unravel, attempting to act natural while being yelled at by Mr. Smith while doing something I'd never done before, serving dinner to five people. I worried that it didn't come out right and that I did something wrong, but more importantly I kept trying to figure out how to keep my two friends from thinking I was pathetic.

The more I saw Jeff and Chris talking to Mr. Smith, Glenn and Nancy, the more nervous I got. I dropped a plate after hearing Jeff laugh and say, "So, he blows a lot of guys?" With the sound of the plate smashing on the floor, Mr. Smith snapped at me again.

"Pull yourself together and stop breaking my shit," he said as I crouched down to try to clean it up. "You might suck a good dick, but there is a lot of work to be done around here and it needs to be done right."

Everyone started laughing loudly and I scurried off to get the dustpan and broom I'd seen under the kitchen sink. I brought it back, crouched down again and swept up the broken plate.

There was no place set for me at the table, so I waited and refreshed people's drinks and took away plates people were finished with. After everyone was finished, eating as well as having conversations I was excluded from, Mr. Smith had everyone adjourn to the living room while I cleaned up.

I couldn't believe that both Jeff and Chris continued to hang around, sitting in the living room and talking with Mr. Smith, Glenn and Nancy the entire time I was clearing the table and rinsing the dishes and loading the dishwasher. Once I had completely cleaned up the dining room and kitchen, I walked nervously out to the living room.

"Can I get anyone another drink?" I asked.

"I'd like a blowjob," said Jeff, laughing.

I froze and looked over at Mr. Smith, who just smiled and shrugged. 

"I'll second that," said Chris.

"But you guys are... straight..."

"Don't have to be gay to get blown by a sissy," Glenn said.

"He just loves sucking that cock," purred Nancy. "It comes so natural to him."

"I bet," chimed in Chris. "I tell you, all the years I've known Kasey, his girlfriends used to come to me to ask how they could break up with him without hurting his feelings too much."

"He is definitely a crybaby," Mr. Smith said.

"Then he started with the leg shaving crap," Chris continued. "He starts showing off and going on and on about how he was straight and this was just something he did to be 'different,' and I was like, yeah, right, just admit you wanna be... well, doing what he's doing now I guess."

"He's gone down on eight guys today," Mr. Smith told my friends. "Still looks hungry though."

"Wow," said Jeff. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised or anything, but he certainly earned that t-shirt, huh?"

I was resigned. I gave up on trying to explain myself, offer excuses or argue in any way. All I did was stand there and let them laugh at me. They took turns calling me a slut, over and over again, as Glenn and Nancy joined with Mr. Smith in talking about my cock sucking skills. While they went on about my eagerness to please men, Jeff and Chris went back and forth about how they weren't in the least bit surprised and how it seemed like I'd found my place with Mr. Smith.

It felt more humiliating than being made to suck cock in the storeroom at Pedro's shoe store, but as I shuffled back and forth from the kitchen to the living room, bringing everyone drinks whenever they needed one, I realized how much humiliation aroused me. At first I was upset that my friends were not supportive, that they didn't try to rescue me, but then I realized they were being supportive. I could not deny what I was and how I had simply become who I'd always been deep inside. 

Their regular compliments on how hot my legs were didn't hurt either.

I was being treated like a waitress, looking on as the others talked and drank and laughed. Then, after everyone was fairly inebriated and I had come back with a glass of wine for Nancy, I found her reclining on the couch with her tree trunk sized legs stretched across Chris' lap. Glenn had lit a joint and they had begun passing it around. When it got to Mr. Smith, he passed it to me.

The more high I got, the more I could not look away from Nancy's legs and how Chris was touching them. I kept asking myself why I couldn't look away and why I was so attracted to her legs. They were so big and fat and her giant thighs were dripping with cellulite. My legs were like those of a swimsuit model, or so I told myself, while hers didn't even belong on the same page.

Then it hit me. She was a woman and she could show off her legs freely, even if they weren't what most people would consider beautiful. I envied that, but there was something more. I found something incredibly sexual in the way they seemed so grotesque to me.

Then, with barely any warning, I lurched forward and fell down on my knees in front of Nancy's thighs. I tried to grab them and kiss them but she pushed me away and then swiveled around on the couch and kicked me in the chest. It wasn't a hard or violent kick, it was just enough to push me down and remind me of my place.

"What did I tell you about that kind of shit, you fucking pervert!" Nancy yelled as she kicked me away.

I tried to collect myself and realized I was crying again. That realization, combined with the scene around me, made me feel completely pathetic.

"Give the baby a pacifier," Nancy snorted to her husband, who then unbuckled his pants and came over to me. 

His pants fell down around his knees and he wasn't wearing any underwear. He was completely hard and stood in front of where I was half-lying on the floor and waved his cock in my face.

"Suck," he said.

I picked myself up enough to be in a kneeling position in front of Glenn. Without a word, and avoiding making eye contact with my two friends, I leaned forward and slowly slid the head of Glenn's cock into my very eager mouth.

My tears kept falling as I began sucking on the head of his cock and then slowly sliding the rest into my mouth before letting it slide out again. I couldn't deny that I wanted to suck Glenn's cock, or that I was sucking it for the second time that day, all while convinced I was in love with his wife.

I felt the presence of another man walking towards me and standing beside me as my head bobbed up and down on Glenn's cock. After I had slid the full length of his cock back and forth in my mouth a dozen times, I released it and licked hungrily at the tip. Then I turned my head slightly to see who was standing beside me.

It was Jeff and his pants were around his ankles. His cock was hard and he was gripping it at the base while smiling.

"Suck," he said.

With tears welling up in my eyes I looked at my friend's cock. It was long and not very big around, but it looked incredibly delicious. It was a moment of surrender and I didn't fight it. I leaned in closer, closed my eyes and wrapped my lips around Jeff's cock.

He used his fingers to lift my chin so I was looking up at him and said, "You've been wanting to suck my cock since we met, haven't you?"

I said nothing, but as I sucked back and forth on the head of Jeff's cock and began sliding it deeper into my mouth I had a realization. I found it far better to be submissive to men than to try to act as if I were their equal in a very shallow friendship. My friendship with Jeff, and with Chris, had always been very shallow because I could never admit to them the things I really felt and wanted. Now I could show them who I really was.

Chris was making out with Nancy on the couch and had pulled up her shirt and unhooked her bra, allowing her big D-Cup breasts with wide, dark nipples to spill out. His hands were all over them and I was distracted by the sight momentarily. Then, Glenn grabbed my head and pulled me away from Jeff and pushed his cock back into my mouth.

Moments later, Nancy thrust her left foot in my direction and waved it around in front of me as I continued sucking her husband's cock. When I let him slide slowly out and ran my tongue hungrily around the head of his cock, she raised her foot and dangled it suggestively.

"Suck," she told me.

I had to get down on all fours to be able to reach her toes with my mouth, but I was happy I did when the first of her toes pushed their way into my mouth. I lavished them with my tongue, drooling anxiously as I tried to show the depths of my gratitude for letting me suck them.

"I love your feet so much," I gasped as my mouth moved from toe to toe.

"You may love my feet," she told me, "but the rest of me is off limits."

"Yes ma'am."

I licked and sucked her toes passionately, all while thinking how badly I wanted to prove my love to Nancy, but knowing my place. Then I felt Mr. Smith come up behind me and yank down my panties. He took up position behind me and I knew what was going to happen even before I felt the head of his cock pushing against my asshole.

"Oh gosh, YES!" I yelled out.

Nancy pulled away from me and reclined back on the couch with Chris. As they started making out and fondling each other, Glenn stepped in front of me. I tried to reach his cock with my mouth, but I couldn't as I tried to remain steady on all fours with Mr. Smith pushing deeper into my ass.

Jeff went over to the couch and sat down on the other side of Nancy. Soon, both of my friends were going at it with my impossible dream girl. Their hands and mouths were on her breasts, her nipples, and working their way down between her legs.

I gasped as Mr. Smith withdrew his cock from my ass quite suddenly and directed Glenn over to the recliner. Glenn sat down and Mr. Smith pushed me over towards him. I got back down on my knees and began sucking Glenn as Mr. Smith positioned himself to enter me once again.

"Fucking double threesome," laughed Glenn.

Once he had fully penetrated me, Mr. Smith took to slamming me hard with every thrust. Each time he did so, it knocked my mouth off of Glenn's cock and I had to struggle to find it again. My body would jerk forward and up with each of Mr. Smith's thrusts and neither my mouth nor my hand could keep working on Glenn. In the seconds between the thrusts I would try to find a way to hold on, to continue enjoying the wonderful feeling of Glenn's cock filling my mouth, but when the thrusts hit I would lose it again.

As if Mr. Smith's powerful thrusts were not enough to cause me to lose focus on giving Glenn head, Nancy was beginning to moan. Her moans continued to get louder and more intense, but I was unable to look in her direction. I imagined what my two friends might be doing to her and felt jealous, not only because I wanted to be able to make love to Nancy like a man, but that I wanted my two friends to double team me with the same kind of enthusiasm.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 09



I finally had to give up on being able to suck Glenn's cock. I managed to hold onto it very lightly with my hand and my head came to rest on his thigh while I stared at his cock while gently stroking it when I could focus. 

Mr. Smith's thrusts continued with their intensity and power. What started as moans I could not control, became a competition with Nancy's moans, and soon I was just loudly moaning out the words "Fuck me" with each and every thrust.

I wanted so badly to get Glenn's cock in my mouth. The idea of having both ends of me filled at once was so desirable to me and it was something I knew I needed to get used to. I kept trying to push it into my mouth with my hand, but Mr. Smith's thrusts would jolt my body and move me away from it again.

I looked over at my beloved Nancy and saw her straddling Glenn and was unable to look away as Glenn penetrated her. With my head bouncing around from the heavy anal pounding I was getting it was hard to keep watching, but I kept looking over to see what was happening.

My own moans and shouts of "fuck me" were getting louder and I was feeling an incredible build-up inside of me. My body was shaking and suddenly Mr. Smith pulled out, causing me to gasp very audibly. He roughly grabbed my hips and with Glenn's help turned me over so I was on the floor on my back.

Glenn threw his leg over me and sat on my chest for a moment before sitting up and pushing his cock down and into my open and very eager mouth. I was able to keep sucking it, although not with the same skill I would have normally, while Mr. Smith entered me again and started pounding me once more with ruthless intensity.

After a minute or two, Glenn began stroking himself fast and hard while keeping the head of his cock in my mouth as much as possible. I felt my body seizing up, in the grip of one of the phenomenal orgasms I'd discovered happened as a result of my getting fucked. My legs were in the air, pointing up at the stars, and as my body shook and shuddered I imagined what they looked like as my ankles fell down on the shoulders of Mr. Smith's big, 6'6" body. They would jump of his shoulders as he pulled back and then fall back on his shoulders as he thrusted forward.

My body continued to seize until I felt the dam burst. I screamed out in joy as my body convulsed. Glenn had been close to getting off and when my orgasm took hold and my body started shaking violently, it pushed him over the edge and I felt his warm semen fill my mouth just as my orgasm peaked.

I collapsed, exhausted, not knowing whether or not Mr. Smith had cum. He looked pleased and satisfied as he dismounted me and helped Glenn get up.

After Glenn got off me, Nancy appeared. She stood over me, completely naked, and with a smile told me she had an "extra special gift" for me. Then she crouched down over my face. Her vagina was shaved very smooth, but I had never seen one like it. The lips were huge, swollen and hung down like the mud-flaps on a tractor trailer truck. It was also dripping with semen.

"Clean me up, lover boy," she told me.

She pressed her pussy against my face and I worked as best I could to lick her. Part of me wanted very badly to impress her by eating her pussy like it had never been eaten before, but the larger part of me wanted to eat the semen my friends had left on and inside of her.

I'd never been very good at going down on a woman, and I'd never really liked the taste. It was something I generally did to try to make a woman I was with feel good. Nancy's pussy had a rancid, rotten taste to it that made me feel nauseous. I licked at the dripping semen but tried to avoid actively licking her vagina.

"Look at that," Jeff said, pointing down at me, "he's grossed out by her pussy but totally into eating our cum!"

"And I thought he loved me," laughed Nancy, who then started grinding her pussy against my mouth and tongue. "Get that tongue all the way up in there, you pathetic cocksucker, get it ALL THE WAY in!"



Kasey's Confession Ch. 10



I woke up the next morning in my new bedroom. I was wrapped in pink sheets topped with a Tinkerbelle themed comforter. On the walls were posters of gorgeous men, shirtless and displayed their well-muscled and oiled upper bodies. I barely remembered setting up the room with the help of Nancy and Mr. Smith after the party ended, but there it all was, and while it freaked me out a little at first I soon began to feel comfortable and happy in my new surroundings.

The door to my bedroom opened abruptly, breaking the spell of my slow and easy adjustment to the way my bedroom looked. Mr. Smith had opened it without knocking and stood there looking annoyed.

"Why aren't you getting ready for work?" he asked.

I stuttered and stammered as I tried to answer him, as work had been the furthest thing from my mind at that moment. Eventually I managed to meekly reply that I was in the process of getting up, but did I really need to go to work? Couldn't I call in sick again?

"I talked to your friend Jeff last night and he said the guys wear shorts all the time in the warehouse, so guess what? You're going to work in your shorts."

"No, but," I stammered, "they wear khaki work shorts. That's totally different."

"He told me there is a chick there that wears shorts like yours sometimes."

"Yes, but Robin is a girl!"

Mr. Smith shook his head at me and quietly laughed. "Jeff is going to tell everyone you work with what he saw last night and you are going to confirm everything.

"

I avoided arguing with Mr. Smith, instead dutifully walking off to the kitchen to make him coffee and breakfast. While he ate, I kneeled before him and sucked his cock.

I then grabbed up the supplies I would need to take a shower and get ready for the day. After I finished, I put on a pair of short shorts that were reasonably acceptable for work, I took myself out to the living room so Mr. Smith could approve my outfit and send me to work.

"If any of your co-workers wants a blowjob, you will go down on them without question. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir."

"Jeff wants you to suck him off in his car on your lunch break. Make sure you do a good job."

"I would be more than happy to do that, sir," I said, very honestly.

At first I was incredibly nervous walking into work. As I approached the door to the warehouse I stood and tried to compose myself. I was going to walk into my job wearing women's short shorts and there was no way around that. I wasn't going to make excuses and I wasn't going to lie. I was, and I am to this day, a cocksucker and I was going to be proud of what I was.

I loved the feeling of a nice, hard cock filling my mouth and I loved knowing that I gave good head. The way I figured, men in general loved getting their cocks sucked and there wasn't enough opportunity to get a good blowjob. I was willing and able to provide a needed service.

Let me correct that. I was very willing to provide that service.

I walked into the warehouse and strutted confidently past my co-workers smiling as I went to my desk and started preparing for the day.

At first there were a lot of "funny" looks. Then I began hearing the muttered comments, especially as I saw Jeff walking around and whispering to my other co-workers while looking in my direction. I didn't care. I crossed my legs as I sat at my desk, smiled and everyone and pretended their rude comments didn't hurt.

After a while the rude comments stopped hurting. They started to turn me on, especially as they became more cruel and more audible. The more I'd hear my co-workers mutter things like "cock sucking fairy" and "faggot girly boy" when they walked past me, usually in pairs, the harder my little dick got in my tight shorts.

Two hours into my shift, and following a large number of disgusted looks and offensive comments, one of my co-workers came to tell me there was a problem with the computer station in the locked storeroom we used for very expensive items. Since fixing computer problems were part of my job description, I followed him to the storeroom.

Jerry was one of my older co-workers. He was over sixty and usually very pleasant and understanding when it came to various people's problems and issues. Some of my co-workers saw him as a sort of father figure, always there to talk to when you were troubled or upset, and always willing to listen without passing judgment.

When we got inside the storeroom, I walked over to the computer in the corner of the room. I actually pranced, showing off my newfound girlish gait while hoping Jerry would admire my legs and ass.

"What's wrong with it?" I asked as I tapped at the keys and found no problems.

"Just shut up and get on your fucking knees," he snarled in a strong, mean-sounding voice that I'd never heard him use before.

I turned around to see Jerry had undone his belt and opened his pants. His rather huge cock was hanging out in the open, only partially erect but looking incredibly delicious.

It was impossible to hide my delight. It is possible I even squealed audibly when I saw it, although I'm fairly sure it was just in my head. I went down on my knees in front of Jerry without question and without pause. I looked up at him for approval as I took his semi-erect cock in my hand and brought it up to my mouth.

In all the excitement I had forgotten that the secure storeroom had video monitoring. Because the room was generally filled with valuable merchandise, there was a video system set up in the event anything went missing or was damaged. It wasn't the kind of video that anyone watched from a monitoring post. It went to computer archives where it could be pulled up and watched if there was reason to.

I was about to give a lot of people reason to pull up those archives.

My arm, the one attached to the hand that was holding Jerry's big penis, was shaking as I leaned in and ran my tongue around and over the head of that penis. I quietly giggled as I felt it starting to get harder in my hand, knowing that was a sign that I was doing my job well.

"You have a gorgeous cock," I told him in my most effeminate voice. "Thank you so much for letting me suck it. I won't let you down."

"Shut the fuck up and just blow me, faggot," Jerry snapped.

I smiled and took his cock back into my mouth immediately. It felt so good to be sucking cock at work. It was so liberating and felt so bad and so wrong that it became extremely exciting. I wanted everyone I worked with to know I was willing and available to give head whenever they wanted. I thought about how I'd been at this job for over two years and how much better those two years would have been if I'd been sucking cock the whole time.

Jerry's gorgeous big cock filled my mouth and stretched my lips as wide as they could go as it pushed into my throat and forced the incredibly wide base into me. Jerry took a very dominant position over me, holding my head and making me gag as he relentless pushed his gift into my throat as deep as it could go. I felt my throat expand to compensate and then Jerry pushed it in even deeper, until my nose was crushed hard against his abdomen.

All I could think at that moment was, "How did I get so lucky?" And when he grunted out his great satisfaction by saying I was the first to ever take his entire cock I felt very proud.

I worked hard to please him, sucking the full length of his cock and deep throating it, then working my lips and tongue together on the head before covering his shaft with long, wet trails of saliva left by my tongue as it moved up and down and then found his balls, which I worked with equal enthusiasm.

"Damn, you give the best head I've ever gotten," Jerry said between moans. "Fucking unbelievable."

At that moment the last of my resistance left me. I knew I was always destined to be a cocksucker. I laughed at my old claims that I was a straight crossdresser when I walked around at Halloween parties in a cheerleader outfit or super-short miniskirt. This was what I always wanted when I strutted about dressed at those parties. I wanted men to see what I was and put me on my knees. I wanted them to see who I was and put me on all fours and take me at either end. I wanted to give the best head in the world and I wanted my ass to be the best fuck anyone ever had.

When Jerry came he forced his cock back into my throat and shot his load deep into me while holding my head and moaning loudly. After he finished he pulled up his pants and left me there, where I remained until I collected myself.

He would endorse my blowjob skills to my other co-workers, as would Jeff, and before long I'd have guys nervously approaching me with trumped up reasons why they needed me to go to the storeroom with them. I knew what they wanted and I was happy to oblige. By the end of the day I had sucked off eight of my co-workers, including Jeff, who I sucked off in his car during my lunch break.

When I left work I felt no regrets about having done what I had done. I liked that when I walked through the warehouse I'd hear my co-workers laughing and talking openly about them. I got turned on whenever someone would mutter "faggot" or "cocksucker" or "fairy boy" at me. I smiled at those I'd gone down on already and simply say, "Don't knock it until you've tried it" to those I hadn't.

When I got home, to my new home with Mr. Smith, I took a shower and changed into a miniskirt and heels. There was a note from him saying he would be home around six o'clock and to have dinner ready for him, so I started making dinner immediately after getting dressed. I wanted Mr. Smith to be pleased with me, it felt so important to me, as being his sissy slut was so much more fulfilling than just running around on my own going down on random men. I loved the feeling of being owned by him, of being his to do with as he pleased, and my reward was getting the thing I loved most in life, which was a steady supply of hard cock.

My life had become about getting the opportunity to suck cock and fulfilling my desire to give pleasure to as many men as possible. I was proud of how I had managed to get eight men, all of whom professed to be straight guys, including five that were married, to let me go down on them at work. I had also managed to complete all my work duties while engaging in so much cock sucking, although I did have to rush quite a bit to make sure everything got done. I was proud of that.

The one thing that confused me was the depth of emotion I'd come to feel about Nancy. When I was on my knees in the storeroom at work I kept imagining she was watching me, encouraging me, belittling me, and calling me names. It made my efforts feel so much more exciting. I could not stop imagining a world in which she was my girlfriend and I did everything to please her, cooking and cleaning and shopping, as well as sucking cock and taking it up the ass for her pleasure and entertainment.

In the past, whenever I had been rejected by a woman I liked, I'd always written her a letter telling her about my feelings and vowing to "do right" by her if only she'd give me a chance. I decided to do the same with Nancy, hoping that seeing my heart expressed in words on a page would give her reason to consider the possibility of a relationship with me.

I started the letter by stating that I knew I could never be worthy of her, but that I wanted to make the effort to become someone she could rely on to love and care for her. I explained that while I loved sex with men, I did not feel romantic feelings towards them. I told her she inspired my heart to sing and that she was always on my mind. It was my hope, I told her, that Glenn was good to her and that he cared for her, but that I believed my love for her was deeper and more real than anything I'd ever felt and that I could not hold back those feelings. I begged her to give me an opportunity to be "with" her and to bring her happiness.

Then, seeing no one was home at their house, I put it in an envelope, wrote her name on it and sealed it tightly before sticking it in the mail slot in their front door. Then I came home and finished preparing dinner for Mr. Smith.

After dinner, Mr. Smith had a new surprise for me. He was pleased to hear of my efforts to make everyone aware I was available to give blowjobs in the back storeroom at any time and told me he had a special reward in mind. He was taking me to see a friend who would pierce my ears, my tongue and my belly button.

I would be sore for a couple of days. While the ear piercings were no big deal, my tongue took a while to adjust to having a metal stud through it and my belly button was sore for almost three days. Still, I was excited to have gotten piercings and they hadn't been as painful as I feared when Mr. Smith first brought up his decision to have me get the piercings.

I started wearing earrings all the time. Mr. Smith had gotten me earrings that had very visible hearts on the face of them. When I was in public wearing them I barely gave them a thought until I saw someone looking at them. They weren't earrings I could excuse as being men's earrings. I've never met another man who wears pink heart earrings, and these were far from being subtle.

I had a chain of matching hearts that hung from my belly button, and my tongue ring was a simple metal stud with a simple barbell at either end. Even after the soreness stopped being an issue, things like eating took time to adjust to. It did not, however, take me any time to get used to sucking cock with the tongue ring.

Nancy and Glenn did not visit for several days. I did not see them at all and for three days there were no cars in their driveway, at least whenever I was at home. I worried, almost to the state of panic that they had moved away.

Mr. Smith had somehow gotten me out of the lease on my apartment. My most important things were now in my room at his house. The most conspicuously absent of my possessions was my "boy clothes," which I was no longer permitted to wear. Many of my things, he informed me, had been placed in storage, which he reminded me was yet another expense he had taken on for me, reinforcing how much I owed him for all he had done.

At work, I sucked Jeff's cock every day on my lunch break. He would be the cruelest and most vicious with his remarks about how I was a freak and a cocksucking slut. I no longer minded the remarks and often welcomed them with a smile. The rest of my co-workers seemed less inclined to take advantage of my services after the novelty of that first day wore off. Getting head from me once was something they seemed able to write off as "just for the hell of it" whereas multiple blowjobs from the long-legged fairy boy at work made them question their sexuality.

On Thursday when I returned home from work, Mr. Smith was waiting for me along with Nancy, who was sitting on the couch saying she came to talk to me.

My heart raced, hoping that somehow my impossible dream of being with Nancy would come to be. I kneeled before her, told her she looked absolutely beautiful, and that I'd missed her so much I thought my heart would explode.

"You poor, confused, stupid sissy," she said after leaning forward and taking my head between her hands. "We really need to get you straightened out, don't we?"

I felt myself starting to cry again as I looked up at her.

"Mr. Smith and I talked about it and we've decided to have a party for you on Saturday night," she told me. "We are going to invite so many men to the party that there is no way, even with your mouth and your ass and both your hands working their cocks all night long, that you'll be able to satisfy them all."

"Will you be there?" I asked Nancy with tears running down my face. "I want to do whatever it takes to make you happy."

"I want to see you broken," Nancy explained. "I'm sick and tired of these pathetic efforts you make to tell me you are in love with me and want me to be your girlfriend. That letter you put in my mailbox was a sickeningly pathetic waste of my time. It was gross, it was disturbing, and it made me want to throw up. Glenn laughed his ass off for twenty minutes after he read it."

"But, but, but... I love you, Nancy."

"It is my deepest hope," she said as she leaned in closer, "that after Saturday night you will be so broken and so degraded by endless hours of men pounding you from every angle that you will stop having any further thoughts like the ones that led to you writing me that sick-making letter and accept your place as a submissive cock whore with no thoughts or desires outside of those you are told to have."

"If that's what you want, Ms. Nancy, then I would be happy to..."

My words choked off as I started crying more openly and I was unable to come up with any more words to say. Digesting what Nancy was telling me was flooding my mind with images and I realized she was going to slip further out of my reach.

"Mr. Smith has been too kind to you, and too easy on you," Nancy told me. "That is about to change. There are some new things that are going to become a regular part of your life. That will start Saturday night with a no holds barred gangbang with you at the center of it all. Hopefully you will get some sense fucked into you."

"Yes, ma'am," I said, looking down at the floor.

She pulled out an 8x10 photograph from the bag she'd brought with her and held it up in front of my face. I looked up dutifully.

It was a picture of an ankle with a tattoo. The tattoo had roses with thorny stems wrapped completely around the ankle with the word "cocksucker" in script written around the ankle along with the stemmed roses. It was subtle enough that the letters weren't immediately apparent from a distance, but were clear when one looked at the ankle closely.

"You will be getting this tattoo," she said very plainly. "It will serve as a permanent reminder, and if you ever get the ridiculous notion of wanting a girlfriend you will always have to consider how you will explain the tat."

"Yes ma'am."

She reached back in her bag and pulled out the largest butt plug I had ever seen. It looked like a big doorknob with a fist sticking out of it.

"You will begin wearing this all the time, except when you are getting your ass fucked. It will keep you stretched out and ready to get fucked, and it will also make certain that you are always walking like someone who gets it up the ass. In those shorts, with those legs, that tattoo, walking the way you'll be forced to with that butt plug, there will be no doubt what you are when you are out in public."

I swallowed hard. "Yes ma'am."

"The shorts you wear out in public need to get shorter, and I mean much shorter. I want to be able to see the bottom of your ass cheeks peeking out when you walk. Anyone who sees you out in public should have the immediate impression that you are eager and desperate for men's attention."

"Yes ma'am."

"Finally, Mr. Smith and I have decided that you need to quit your job. There is no sense in you working for such a small wage when he can provide for you. It is better if you are financially dependent on him and that way you won't be thinking about leaving him or giving up the life that he and I both believe best suits you."

"I will provide you with everything you need," Mr. Smith added, "and if you please me, then you may also receive a small allowance to help with incidental expenses you might have."

I nodded quietly, trying to soak in what was happening as I saw control of my life being given completely to Mr. Smith. I also saw Nancy playing a key role, which made me happy, as deep inside I hoped that by pleasing her she would see me as someone she could have a meaningful, romantic relationship with.

"I can tell by the look on your face and in your eyes what you are thinking right now," Nancy told me. "You want to please me, but for all the wrong reasons. When the hope you have that I will somehow come to love you and want to be with you finally dies, that will please me more than anything."




Kasey's Confession Ch. 10



They took me to see their friend the tattoo artist that night, and as part of the payment for the work I gave the artist and his assistant blowjobs. Then, with my ankle still covered with a bandage, I made a late supper for Nancy and Mr. Smith.

Nancy was wearing riding boots, and after dinner she told me to get down on all fours and lick her boots. I licked the tops, the sides, and the bottoms while looked up at her occasionally in the hopes that I pleased her. She looked at me disgustedly while telling me to keep licking, which I did while fantasizing that she would take them off and let me do what I really wanted, which was to lick and kiss her feet.

Mr. Smith, who fucked me every night, yanked down my shorts and mounted me while I continued working on Nancy's boots with my tongue. Once he started slamming me hard, thrusting with reckless abandon, I started crying, holding onto Nancy's boots and trying to lick them with my now sore and very dry tongue.

Then, quite unexpectedly, she reached down and pulled off her boots. She shoved her sweaty, calloused feet in my face.

"Suck my toes like you are sucking a cock," she told me. "You need to practice doing that while taking it up the ass. Men aren't going to keep putting up with your inability to multitask forever."

My night had been made. I opened my mouth and slid my lips over her big toe and started sucking back and forth on it with my dry lips and mouth. Wanting so badly to make Nancy happy, I managed to keep sucking back and forth while Mr. Smith continued fucking me fast and hard.

"Just imagine my toes are ten cocks all waiting to be serviced by you," she told me.

"Uh huh," I muttered as I moved slowly over to her second toe and worked it into my mouth.

"Imagine how beautiful my feet would look to you if they each had five COCKS growing out of them instead of toes."

"Oh gosh," I gasped as I worked my way to her third toe, "that would be so awesome."

"Now, imagine if I had a big cock and balls instead of a pussy," she told me as I kept sucking her toes. "Imagine if I didn't have these big tits. Imagine if I was strong and muscular and hairy."

"Oh yes, that would be so awesome," I moaned.

She reached down and lifted up my head to look at her. "Then I would be a man, Kasey. Then you would be in love with a man."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 11



On Saturday morning, Mr. Smith had me start my day by writing a letter to Nancy.

"Dear Nancy," I wrote. "I am sorry for all the trouble I may have caused you with my conflicted emotions. I understand now that the reason I fell in love with you was because you were a woman, because you were the only woman who accepted me as I was. I understand now this was because I am afraid to fall in love with a man and because I keep desperately clinging to a misguided belief that I am somehow straight and that I am somehow still a man myself. The things that I do and the way I am so willingly submissive to men have been difficult to accept. I hope that you can forgive me and I hope you will enjoy seeing me getting and loving the attention of so many men today."

I signed it "Love, Kasey" and with Mr. Smith at my side I went over to Nancy and Glenn's house and handed it to her.

"Come on in, sweetie," she said. "I made breakfast."

I was wearing the shorts she wanted me to wear, so short that my ass cheeks peaked out from underneath when I walked. The butt plug was in, uncomfortable but making me walk quite distinctively like someone who took it up the ass on a very regular basis, and I was wearing pink sneakers along with low ankle socks that left my "cocksucker" ankle tattoo very visible.

"Big day today, huh?" she said with a grin. "That sexy body of yours is going to get a real workout."

"Yes, ma'am, I'm looking forward to it," I said nervously.

Nancy led Mr. Smith and myself into the kitchen and put down plates of bacon and eggs and toast in front of us. Then she opened and read my letter.

She was wearing incredibly short cut-offs and I couldn't stop staring at her massive thighs. I fought my urge to reach out and touch them while trying to focus on my breakfast. As she read she moved closer to me until her thighs were brushing against my arm.

"Would you like to make love to me?" she asked after reading the letter.

I was surprised to the point of complete shock when she asked the question. I did not know how to answer. After giving her the letter I had assumed all hope for us being together was lost and now I didn't know what to think.

I looked over at her and down at her thigh, which kept rubbing against my arm. Half of her enormous ass was hanging out of her cut-offs and I could not look away. I stopped eating and stared at her ass and her thigh and then up at her with my lip quivering. I was speechless.

"Your old friend Chris has been coming over and fucking me regularly," she told me. "He's even fucked my ass."

Nancy took my hand and brought it up to touch her exposed ass cheek. I looked over at Mr. Smith, who shrugged and mouthed the words "go for it." 

Stuttering and stumbling over my words, I managed a weak response, "Yes... yes, Ms. Nancy... I... I... I... would like... to... make... love... to... you..."

Nancy took my hand and helped me get up from the table. As Mr. Smith and Glenn looked on, she led me into her bedroom. I stood in front of her, shaking and unable to speak as she slowly undressed. As she took off her shirt and the rolls of fat spilled out I stared in ecstatic agony. When she took off her bra and her giant breasts fell and hung down from her chest, slapping against her fat rolls, I lost my balance and had to grab hold of her dresser to keep from falling over. When she pulled down her shorts and kicked off her flip-flops and stood before me completely naked I began crying tears of joy.

"You are... the most... boo... boo... beautiful wo... wo.. woman I've ever seen..."

"Take off your clothes, stud," she told me with an evil grin.

I stripped quickly, losing my balance several times as I tried to pull off my shorts and my sneakers. She sat down on the edge of her bed and then reclined backwards so she was lying naked on her back across the bed. I moved awkwardly towards her. I could not believe this was really happening.

My awareness of the presence of the huge butt plug in my ass became painfully overwhelming as my knee touched the edge of the bed. I was also overwhelmingly aware of the fact that my penis was completely soft, even as I was feeling so aroused by the situation and the sight of Nancy's naked body spread across the bed waiting for me.

"Come on, baby," Nancy sighed, "put it in me and make love to me."

I tried stroking myself as I crawled onto the bed. There was no measurable reaction. I got on top of Nancy and pressed my body against hers. It felt so good to be naked with her, and the way my body seemed to sink into her fat felt divine. And yet I could not get anything approaching an erection.

"What's the matter, honey?" she asked as I tried grinding against her. "Don't you want to make love to me?"

"I can't... I can't... get it... hard..." I whined.

"Let me try something," she said, sounding strangely understanding. She moved me off her and knelt down beside me and took my penis in her hand. She stroked my small, soft penis several times and then put it in her mouth. My whole body was writhing in excitement. The woman I loved and desired was sucking on my penis!

It had no reaction. As much as my body writhed and twitched with excitement, my penis would not get even a little bit erect for her. I was crying profusely and apologizing, but the more she tried the more frustrating it became.

I closed my eyes and then opened them when I heard men's voices. Mr. Smith was standing in the doorway with a group of men I had never seen before behind him.

"Let the games begin," he said and stepped out of the way.

Nancy got off the bed with a big smile on her face as the men took over. Five naked men were grabbing at me and pulling my legs forcibly apart. As they did so I looked down at my penis.

It had quickly gotten as hard as a rock.

"Ms. Nancy," I pleaded as she stood in the doorway watching the men with me, "I'm ready now, please, I want to make love to—"

My pleaded ended as a cock was forced into my mouth and I felt the giant butt plug being pulled out. I quickly realized the party wasn't starting that night. It was starting that morning and it was going to be going on for a very long time. I could hear other men out in the hallway and throughout the house.

"Break him," Nancy hissed as she got dressed. "Break him so I never have to put up with his shit again. Make him into the bitch he really is."

I sensed other men entering the room, but could not see as I was being held down with a cock on either side of my face. One would enter my mouth and I would suck on it for a while and then it would be pulled out with the cock on the other side being pushed into my mouth in its place. There was another cock in my ass, fucking me slowly, while my legs were held up in the air by men who were running their hands up and down them, kissing them and licking them. My arms were extended away from my body and in each hand was a hard cock, which I tried to stroke as best I could.

It was heaven.

I had my first orgasm not long after a third man's cock penetrated my ass. My body shook like a volcano erupting and the men held my legs steady and still pointed up at the sky as I moaned loudly and twitched wildly. Then they continued without pause, with cocks changing places as new men fucked me, appeared over my head and made me suck them, and new cocks were slapped into my hands. Men were still kissing and licking my legs and some men had taken to licking my feet and sucking my toes. I came again, no more than twenty minutes after my first orgasm, but it wasn't nearly as intense. A third would follow some time later, but the intensity was greatly reduced.

After my third orgasm I began to struggle. I felt like I couldn't take it any longer and started begging then men to stop. They kept going without pause.

I was reaching the breaking point that Nancy had gone on about.

I started to become numb, barely feeling the hands all over me, the cocks in my ass or the ones slapping mercilessly against my face.

"Should we get the faggot on the rack?" I heard someone ask.

"Not yet," said someone else. "Keep at it."

I was covered in cum, but barely noticed, even as I felt it dripping down my face, down the length of my legs and all across my body. My moans were quieter and my pleading with them to stop became no more than a hoarse whisper. I stopped fighting.

"Okay, let's get him on the rack."

I was helped to a standing position and held up by several men who walked me to another bedroom where there was what appeared to be a modified weight-lifting bench. There was a flat bench with two leg platforms spread apart in a "V" shape and raised upwards. The bars that held weights were fitted with leather restraints, as were the ends of the leg platforms. I was placed on it, my wrists were secured with the restraints, and my legs were stretched upwards on the platforms and then my ankles were secured with restraints. Then a metal piece was forced into my mouth. It was a circular piece with clamps that forced my mouth open, allowing cocks to be put in my mouth without my having to keep my mouth open for them. My head fell back and down, as there was no support for it. Then I was blindfolded before the men began going at me again.

Another cock was pushed into my aching ass. Another into my mouth, which just fucked my mouth without my having to do anything to suck it, while hands continued to grope my body, and I could not resist or protest in any way.

I don't know how long I was kept like that, strapped to what they called "the rack" while men fucked my ass and my mouth while groping and ejaculating on my body. At some point I was released, the ring gag removed, and I dropped lifelessly to the floor. I couldn't stand, I couldn't crawl, and I couldn't even feel my arms or my legs.

Nancy, dressed in her t-shirt, cut-offs and flip-flops walked over and stood over me and asked, "Do you want to make love to me, Kasey?"

I was quivering as I lied in a helpless pile on the floor. My mouth was numb and sore from being forced open for so long and having so many cocks in it. I looked up at her with eyes barely open and said nothing.

"Do you love me?" she asked.

I suddenly gagged and coughed, and I started spitting up cum. I found my voice at that point, but it was weak and I sounded like a little girl when I spoke.

"Please, make them stop," I said meekly.

"But you aren't completely broken yet," Nancy said. "When you are completely broken you won't ask them to stop. You'll accept what you are."

"I accept it," I said, my lips quivering, "I am a sissy cocksucker and I love cock. I don't love you. I love men. I love cock. I love cock."

"Good, because you've got a lot more that need your love, sissy faggot," she sneered. "You should be real loose now, so I want to see you getting double-penetrated. And when you get too loose for that I want them fisting your sissy ass."

I looked helplessly up at her through my eyes, which were swollen and half closed.

"You are like a tube of toothpaste," Nancy said, grinning. "And I want every last bit of you squeezed out of that tube."

Mr. Smith walked up next to her holding a beer and smiling at me. "Nancy is a tough mistress," he told me. "You were playing with fire when you started messing with her. If you listened to me and left her alone you'd be having a much better day, but you're her bitch now."

The rest of the night was a complete blur. I remember the faces of men and being turned over in different directions. I remember trying my best to suck the cocks that were shoved into my mouth even as my mouth lost all feeling and felt swollen and dry. I remember being given water and having beer poured in my mouth. I remember men laughing and calling me all kinds of names as they worked me over. At some point I passed out.

When I woke up I was sprawled across a bed completely naked. It wasn't my bed at Mr. Smith's house and it wasn't a bed at Nancy and Glenn's place. I was in a very dingy, dirty and cheap looking room in some kind of hotel.

I was sore all over, and I could barely move without pain, but I found my way over to the window and pulled aside the 1970s style curtains and looked out. What I saw was a city I didn't recognize, and it wasn't bright lights and shining buildings, it was the bowels of a city. From my second floor room I could see what clearly looked like drug dealers, prostitutes and sad, homeless people shuffling along.

Looking for my clothes, I found only the shorts Nancy wanted me to wear, the ones cut so short that my ass cheeks peeked out when I walked. There was also a pink t-shirt, a pair of pink thong panties, and one of the pairs of high heels I'd bought at Pedro's shoe store. I had no other clothes or possessions. There was no wallet, no ID, and no keys outside of a room key attached to a garish plastic fob with "204" written on it.

I wanted to get out of there as fast as possible. Feeling sticky and sweaty I took a shower, and suffered through what became quickly obvious was a lack of hot water in the room. The shower didn't make me feel better and I didn't feel all that much cleaner than I had been. After that I put on the clothes I had and walked out into the hallway, found the elevator was permanently out of order, and took the stairs down to the first floor and found the front desk.

My first thought was to check out and go home, but then I realized I had no home. My apartment lease had been terminated and I'd been living with Mr. Smith, who had in turn apparently given me to Nancy who had somehow dumped me at this cheesy hotel. I had no money, no ID, no wallet and there was no one I could call. My only friends had turned out not to care about me at all. I had no family to speak of, and certainly no one I could turn to for help.

"You're paid through tonight," muttered the desk clerk as I approached. He was a middle-aged man with a bad comb-over and a white t-shirt covered with what looked to be food stains.

"Where am I?"

"DuBois Hotel, room 204," he said without looking up from the magazine he was reading. "You planning on sending a postcard or something?"

I'd never heard of the DuBois Hotel and wanted to ask him what city I was in and what day it was, but I thought better of it and walked away from the front desk. An old man was reading a newspaper in the corner. It was the Sunday paper for a city almost a thousand miles away from where I lived. It was daylight out, so I pieced together that it was now Sunday and I was no longer anywhere near the places I knew in the city I called home.

"Hey," called out the desk clerk as I walked towards the front door, "if you start bringing johns back to your room, you need to give me a cut to look the other way."

"Huh?"

"Well, you're obviously a working girl, so just makin' sure you know the rules is all."

"I'm not a hooker," I told him defiantly.

The desk clerk laughed, as did the old man reading the newspaper. "Yeah, and this is the Hyatt Regency. Whatever you say, whore, but you're only paid through tonight. Check-out is at noon, no exceptions. Thirty bucks a night. That's the best rate around, and there ain't no other joint lets you take johns up to the room without a hassle."

I didn't know what to do, but I knew I wanted to get out of this place. I went through the front door, dressed in my short shorts and high heels, and looked around. There were broken needles on the ground and junkies leaning against the walls of the alleys that ran alongside the hotel. I could see women who were clearly down and out hookers walking along the street. One of the hookers stopped and talked to a man in a car and then went off with him down a side street. 

I saw a pay phone and ambled over to it, but then realized I had no change and there was no one I could call to get me out of this situation. I thought about taking off my heels, as it wasn't easy walking in them and I knew I looked like just another hooker, but I didn't want to walk barefoot on a street littered with broken glass and needles. 

A big white 1970s style Cadillac pulled up to where I was standing and looking confused. Two black men leaned over to get a better look at me through the open passenger side window.

"Hey there, sweet thing," the driver said. "You looking to party?"

"No," I said, starting to cry as the dire nature of my circumstances was becoming clearer to me. "I'm looking to get home."

"Where's home, tranny?" the driver asked. "Maybe we can get you there," he added and held up what looked to be a small quantity of drugs.

"How about we give you ten bucks to blow us both in the alley," the passenger said.

I was hungry and hadn't eaten in quite some time, and the proposition made me realize I was hungry not only for food but also for cock. With as much cock as I'd gotten the day before, I had been quite a while without any. The proposition answered both of my needs at once, so I got into the back seat and the men drove me down an alley to a courtyard between tenements filled with trash. 

First, the passenger got into the back seat with me. He took out his cock and very casually pulled his pants down to his ankles. It was a big, fat cock, but I had to work hard to get it hard. It tasted like old motor oil and sweat and had a powerful musky smell. At first it turned my stomach, but it very quickly became like an aphrodisiac and I was sucking his cock with enthusiasm.

Once he was completely hard and I was able to slide my lips up and down his greasy cock and work him towards orgasm, he made a remark about how it was "obvious" that I knew what I was doing. When he got off, shooting his load down my throat, he patted me on the head and then pulled up his pants quickly and got into the front seat.

It was the driver's turn, and he wasted little time in getting into the back seat of the old Cadillac with me. He pulled down his pants to reveal that he was already completely hard, which made me happy as I imagined he was so turned on watching me suck off his friend in the backseat that he had gotten completely stiff waiting for his turn.

I teased him a little, running my tongue around the edge of his cock head, but he then pushed me down hard on him and held my head to where I had to choice but to simply bob up and down on him while working the best magic I could with my lips and tongue under the circumstances. After he came down my throat, he shoved me off of him quickly and got out of the car, pulling me out with him.

"You have got some talent, tranny," he told me as he handed me a bunch of crumpled up one dollar bills that were clumped together in one sweaty mass. "Next time I'm lookin', I'll be lookin' for you."

I took the money, unfolded it and counted it as they pulled away. There were only nine singles, not ten, but watching their taillights as they drove down the alley and away I didn't feel I was in a position to argue. I'd seen a crappy looking diner on the main road and wanted something to eat. That was what mattered right then and there.

I ordered coffee and a turkey sandwich while sitting on a stool at the counter. The waitress, a big, mean looking lady who chain-smoked, brought it to me without saying anything, but I could tell she was looking for proof that I had money so I put my dirty pile of dollar bills on the counter where she could see them.

"Hey there, sexy legs," I heard a man's voice say as I was enjoying my sandwich.

I looked up to see a balding, middle-aged man in a very tacky looking suit. He sat down next to me, called out to the waitress by name, and told her, "I'll have what she's having," referring to me.

"What's your name?" he asked me, running his tongue over his cruel, thin lips.

"Kasey," I said after gulping down a mouthful of coffee.

"I was looking at those sexy legs from my place the whole time you were walking down the street. Mmm, mmm! Up close they are even sexier," he said, putting his pudgy, slimy hand on my thigh.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 11



"Thank you," I said quietly, hoping he would go away.

He looked at my arms, smiled and put three twenty dollar bills down on the counter in front of me. "You ain't got no track marks," he whispered as he leaned towards me and I could feel his hot breath in my ear, "you are new and you look very clean and eager. I'll give you sixty if you let me fuck you bareback."

Part of me wanted to tell him to "fuck off" and leave me alone, but I was finding the idea of rejecting or pushing away men to be completely contrary to my nature and my needs. His sixty would pay for two nights at my awful hotel room. It might be enough to get me a bus ticket home. On top of that, as sore and tired as I was from the party the day before, my first thought after hearing his proposition was that I needed a good fuck to get the day started.

"Okay," I said and picked up two of the twenties and slid the other one back over to him, "but I don't want to overcharge you. I'm not worth sixty."

I finished my sandwich and coffee, and as I went to pay the check, he told the waitress he was picking up my tab. Then he squeezed my knee and told me to wait while he finished his sandwich.

He ate like a pig, with mayonnaise from his sandwich dripping out of the corner of his mouth and pieces of his sandwich flying out of his mouth as he talked with his mouth full. He finally finished the sandwich, while making remarks to everyone around, all of whom seemed to know him and not care very much for him, and washed it down by chugging his coffee.

"Let's go, sexy tranny hooker," he said, slapping me on the thigh as he stood up and threw down some money for the check.

I nodded without saying a word and followed him outside. He led me across the street to a broken down brick building. The windows of the first floor apartments were partially boarded up and the staircase to the second floor, where my new friend lived, featured creaky stairs covered with trash and broken glass. I had even seen what looked like a rat scurrying across the floor of the first floor landing after we entered the building.

He insisted I walk up the stairs ahead of him, and when I did he spent the entire time making remarks about my ass and my shorts. "Those shorts look so fucking hot on you," he said. "What a sweet little fuck-able ass you have. I am going to love tearing that thing UP!"

His apartment was filthy. There were empty food containers and beer cans everywhere and flies buzzing around them. He had piles of pornographic magazines and videos of all styles and kinks. It didn't at all surprise me, given the way he presented himself, but what did surprise me were the number of books on his shelves about chemistry, medicine, psychiatry and the like.

He saw my attention lingering on the books and called me away from them. "I used to be a shrink," he muttered, "a long time ago."

I nodded sadly and looked away from the books and back at the man who lived in this apartment, whose name I learned was Gary. He cleared old newspapers and a pizza box off the old sofa he had, which was badly stained and had stuffing hanging out of various rips and tears. Then he told me to sit down while he went to the kitchen and brought back two cans of beer. They were a very cheap, generic brand I'd often seen bought and drank by the people who begged for change in front of gas station convenience stores.

"Thank you," I said.

"You really do have great fucking legs and a cute as hell ass," he told me before sitting down on a chair across from me. It didn't match the couch at all, but was at least as well stained and worn out.

"Did you want to, you know, get to it?" I asked anxiously.

"Relax, baby girl," he said, almost cooing at me. "I'll pay you whatever you want for your time on top of what I'm paying to fuck your ass. Just chill out and relax."

"Okay, no problem."

"Would you be willing to let me tie you up? I would love to see you tied, spread eagle, naked, to the four posts of my bed." He paused and added, "Ass up, of course, in all its glory."

"I really don't... know," I replied nervously. "I'm honestly not really a hooker, I ended up here after a really wild party and I'm just trying to get home, although I really don't know where home is anymore."

"If you let me tie you like I said, and let me enjoy your beautiful body in any way I choose, I will give you all the money and help you need to get to wherever home is."

I had no reason to trust Gary, and I didn't trust him, but I was desperate for some way to escape from the dire circumstances I'd been left in. I didn't see any other real option to earning my food and hotel room money through hooking on the street. It wasn't as if I could go looking for a job wearing short shorts and high heels. I looked again at Gary's bookshelf and thought maybe if this man really had been a psychiatrist at some point he might really want to help me.

"Okay, you can tie me up," I said with a forced smile.



Kasey's Confession Ch. 12



The restraints Gary used to secure me, face down, on his bed were well-worn leather restraints attached to unusually heavy chain. Once I was restrained and helpless, spread-eagle across his bed, which was stripped off all blankets and sheets except for a single, very clean white sheet underneath me that felt like it was made of tablecloth fabric rather than the fabric one usually made bed sheets from.

"You look so beautiful," he said once he was convinced I was completely secured. "Damn though, your ass has been fucked completely raw. I thought you said you were new in 'the business' as they say?"

"I was gangbanged at a party," I confessed.

"Willingly or...?"

"Willingly," I replied.

"Your body is so smooth," Gary said as he used his hands to gently apply some kind of oil or cream all over my naked body, "and so feminine. Are you on any kind of hormone treatment?"

"No," I said.

"So you are naturally built like a bitch with a dick," he said, matter-of-factly.

"I guess."

Gary walked away from the bed and into another room. He came back pushing a little cart of the kind one rolls food on in a hospital. I strained to see what he was doing, but it was hard to hold my head up and turn it in that direction.

Gary checked my restraints to make sure they were tight and tightened the one around my right ankle, the one without the "cocksucker" tattoo. Then he went back to his cart and pulled out three long hypodermic needles and placed them on a towel he had draped over the top of his cart.

"What are you doing?" I said and started straining against my restraints, trying to free myself. "I didn't agree to whatever you are doing with those needles."

"Poor baby," he said, sounding sarcastic and dismissive. "Why do you think I had you agree to be restrained?"

He prepared one needle and while I struggled he pressed it against the back of my right thigh and injected me with whatever he had in the needle. Then he waited and watched me as I stopped struggling and my body went completely limp.

"Very powerful muscle relaxant," he told me flatly.

He went to his cart and got another needle after tying off my arm with a piece of rubber tubing. He then emptied the content of the second needle into my bloodstream.

"This will heighten your awareness of your surroundings and intensify your body's reaction to stimuli," he said as he leaned down to kiss my ass cheek.

I felt no immediate effect from the second shot, and Gary immediately went back for the third needle. He prepared it and then injected it into the hamstring muscle of my left thigh.

"That one," he said after finishing, "will make you extremely suggestible. Your impulse to think independently is suppressed and you become eager to follow whatever you are told to do as a compensation for becoming unable to think independently."

After quite some time passed with Gary just watching me and checking my vital signs from every few minutes, I started to feel very strange. I was lightheaded, but it was more than that. A fly was buzzing around in front of my face, and as I turned to look at it the fly took on the appearance of a gigantic cartoon dragon.

"How you doin'?" it asked in a weird, comical voice.

"Oh shit," I started yelling in a panic while struggling against my restraints, "let me out of here!"

The colors and shapes throughout the room were starting to blend together and I could hear what sounded like carnival music. I continued to struggle and panic for several minutes, and then I started to feel something else, something I couldn't define or even understand. I stopped understanding why I was struggling, or why I wanted to go free, or why I was at all bothered by the strange surroundings.

"You are very glad to be here," Gary whispered in my ear.

"I am glad," I said with a smile as I watched what appeared to be two demonic butterflies staring at me from their perch on the bookshelf.

Gary walked around the bed and released my restraints. I remained in the same position, stretched across the bed, after the restraints were removed until Gary told me to bring my arms and legs together and to turn over.

I couldn't operate my muscles very well at all, but I struggled to comply and got upset when I was unable to do as I was told. Then Gary crawled onto the bed and helped me to comply with his request. Once I had drawn my arms and legs in to my body and turned over I felt very happy, not because I was more comfortable and free, but that I had been able to follow instructions and comply with them.

"You are the perfect subject for my experiments," Gary told me as he scribbled notes in a journal. As I looked at him, pleased that he'd called me a 'perfect subject' he took on the appearance of a powerful wizard I remembered from an old cartoon. With the room awash in vibrant colors and sound seeming to form shapes that floated in the air, his appearance felt comforting.

He helped me sit up enough to drink a large glass of water and then let my head rest on a pillow he provided. It felt so soft against my head, like an explosion of feathers which then danced around my head.

"We can't let you get dehydrated," he explained before continuing. "I've learned quite a bit from past experiments, before they took my medical license and called me a dangerous quack. When I came here to utilize the streetwalker population. I needed a clean subject, which is hard to come by with all these junkies around her, and you were so perfect."

Gary took on the appearance of a large cartoon duck, and his voice started sounding like he was quacking between sentences. I giggled and smiled.

"I see no evidence that you are a habitual drug user," he said, continuing to scribble in his notebook, "but I do worry that you have one or more STDs with the evidence that shows you've engaged in very frequent and heavy anal sex."

"I like getting fucked hard," I giggled. "I love it, love it, love it."

"Of that I have no doubt," muttered Dr. Duck, which had become the name I thought of now when I looked at Gary. "That is not the focus of my experiment. I do intend to utilize you sexually, but not within the parameters of my work. That will be for recreation."

"Okay," I smiled.

"How do you feel about yourself?"

I stared blankly at Dr. Duck.

"Do you hate yourself? Do you engage in dangerous, self-destructive behavior as a way of expressing frustration with who you are?"

"Huh?"

"For the sake of this first experiment, we'll assume that you are a self-hating man who has engaged in self-destructive behaviors, such as anal sex with many partners, and prostituting himself on the street, in order to escape from the shortcomings he feels he has and the disappointments he's faced and been unable to deal with."

"You look like a duck," I giggled.

"I would like to determine if, under the influence of the drugs I have listed as being used during the experiments; it is possible to make the test subject fall in love with himself. The subject, Kasey, is a transvestite prostitute who is new to the streets. He presents as female with a lower body that is very feminine, but an upper body and face that are very male, although I would not say masculine. The subject was found wearing very short women's shorts which did not completely cover his buttocks, along with a pair of five inch high heeled shoes which showed off the subject's high arches and toenails, which were painted a bright pink, and accented his very attractive, long, feminine legs."

His words swam around me like a bizarre and incomprehensible soup. He was talking out loud as he wrote in his journal and barely looked at me at all while doing so.

Dr. Duck came over to the bed and helped me sit up and prop myself up against the headboard with pillows behind me. He then put a device that looked like a big flashlight down over my penis, which felt amazingly soft and warm as it gently squeezed me. Then he attached the restraints around my ankles again, but this time they were attached to a kind of pulley system above the bed, which he used to pull my legs so they were pointed upwards and my inner thighs were brushing against the sides of my face. Then he worked some kind of electric dildo into my asshole. When he turned it on, the vibrations filled me with incredibly, ecstatic feeling, but then he turned it off and left it inside me.

"Look at your beautiful legs," he said. When I did so, marveling at how under the influence of the drugs I'd been given my legs looked stunning and overwhelmingly beautiful. "Now," he went on to say, "when you say 'my legs are beautiful' or 'I have gorgeous legs' you will get a quick vibration from the vibrator and a quick jerk from the simulated vagina. When you say 'I love my legs' you will also get one of each, but if you say, for example, 'I want to make love to my legs' or 'I am falling in love with my legs' you will get two of each. If you kiss and lick your own legs, you get jolts from both devices for the entire time you physically demonstrate desire and love, and those jolts with intensify as you talk to your legs and tell them you love them, that you want to make love to them, so on and so forth. Just go with what feels good and keep going until you reach orgasm. Then we will take a break and begin again when you are ready."

With my face sandwiched between my thighs, which felt unbelievably soft and smooth, I started talking to them, telling them I loved them and thought they were beautiful. When I spoke it came out as real emotion and not as something I was saying because I was told to. I could feel the real emotion and kept going, buoyed by that feeling and by how the devices in my ass and around my penis gave me very pleasing jolts with every statement of love and admiration.

I wanted more, as the jolts were pleasing, but ended too abruptly and left me wanting more, so I began kissing my legs. The kisses were slow and deliberate at first, but became more passionate as the jolts became more regular and more satisfying.

After a few minutes I was unable to control myself. I was feverously kissing and licking my legs while moaning out statements such as "I'm so in love with my legs" and "My legs are so beautiful" and finally "I am in love with myself! I am in love with myself!" over and over until the jolts became so intense that my body shook in a profound and intense orgasm that was nothing like I'd ever felt before. It exploded in color and light and everything seemed so beautiful and heavenly.

Dr. Duck started again, after giving me another dose of all three of the drugs, and once again I passionately tore into my thighs, kissing and licking and biting them with uncontrollable desire, professing my love for them and for myself. 

We repeated the process many times, and while the repeated efforts did not necessarily produce and orgasm, the feeling I got was so intense and enjoyable that I kept going. At one point, Dr. Duck took away the stimulation devices from my ass and penis and had me make out with my legs and profess love for them without stimulation, which I did to the point of losing consciousness in an ecstatic haze.

Dr. Duck kept me drugged for at least three days, feeding me, giving me water, and allowing me time to rest between sessions. As they went on, I no longer needed encouragement, and no longer noticed the absence of the sexually stimulating devices that were taken away after the first day.

At the beginning of the third day, Dr. Duck talked to me in an affirmative voice while having me watch a video with a series of seemingly unrelated images. 

"You love your legs not only because they are beautiful and sexy and arouse you more than anything or anyone, but because of how good they are to carry the rest of you around town when you walk somewhere, because of how they support you when you stand..."

His affirmations went on for what felt like forever as I stared at the images on the screen while my head was held in place by some sort of restraint device I couldn't comprehend in my altered state of consciousness. By the time he stopped talking and reminding me of how good my legs had been to me throughout my life and how they attracted men I could please sexually, I wanted nothing other than to kiss them and lick them and tell them I was in love with them.

I was almost hyperventilating as Dr. Duck leaned me back onto the bed. He covered my thighs with a thick, slippery oil that could have been anything from vegetable oil to baby oil. Then he used a good deal of heavy twine to tie my ankles together and then to tie my legs together just above the knees. After that had been done, he tied a very strong string around the base of my penis, which had gotten quite hard, and then pulled the two ends of string between my thighs and secured the ends around each of my big toes before pulling me up to a kneeling position.

The string pulled tighter, pulling my erect penis between my oiled thighs, which we tied together. When I breathed or moved in any way, the string would tighten to give some slack, or my thighs would move in unison, or some other part of me would move in some small way that all brought the same result.

I was fucking my thighs with my dick and I couldn't stop.

My heart was racing, my breathing was fast and intense, I was moaning deeper and louder than I ever had, and the sensation was more than I could bear. I started trying to use my hands to stop what was happening, but when they fell on my thighs and tried to pull them apart, all that happened was that my dick slapped back and forth along the oiled slot between my thighs, and before long I was enjoying touching my slippery legs too much to even consider doing anything else with my hands.

"I fucking love my legs! I love my legs! I'm so fucking in love with my legs!" I yelled as I moaned loudly and uncontrollably and kept trying to catch my breath. I couldn't remember ever being anything close to as excited and sexually stimulated as I was at that moment. I leaned forward and down with my head, trying to kiss my own thighs as my rock hard dick continued mercilessly fucking the impossibly beautiful and smooth flesh of my inner thighs.

It came unexpectedly, as my throes of ecstatic overload masked it all too well, but I was about to get off, and as my dick sank between my slick thighs and came up again for air, there was a sudden jerk and semen began shooting out of me and across the tops of my thighs.

"Rest, and then we will begin again."

On the fourth day, the regular doses of the drugs Gary had been giving to me stopped. I began the day completely sober and straight. He no longer looked like a cartoon duck to me, and the intensity of my surroundings had given way to looking like the hovel of an apartment I had first entered four days earlier.

Gary handed me two hundred dollars, all in twenty and ten dollar bills, and said it was to pay for my "troubles." He also asked me if I would stick around for a while so he could see the results of his experiment and document his "findings."

"I don't really have anywhere else to go," I said. He brought me a can of store brand spaghetti and orange-colored sauce and gave me a spoon to eat it with. As I sat eating it, my focus fell down on my legs, crossed under the table as I was eating.

I could not look away, I reached down and started running my hands up and down along the full length of them while quietly moaning. I closed my eyes and kept touching my legs and muttering "I love you, I love you, I love you," to them. 

"Kasey? Are you okay?" Gary asked.

"Yes," I said quickly and opened my eyes. "I, um, think I need to be alone for a little while."

"You can use the bedroom," he said with a smile. "I'll be out here waiting until you get back."

I went into the bedroom and closed the door. My hands started roaming down to my legs and I threw myself onto the bed and began groping and kissing my legs with unbridled passion while moaning out that I was in love with them and I wanted to make love to them. After a few minutes I pulled out my erect penis and began slapping it against my thighs and rubbing it hard and fast against my thigh with my open hand. My moaning got louder and louder, as did my professions of love, but Gary did not enter the room. 

Once I had ejaculated, I relaxed and reclined on the bed, gently caressing my legs and quietly telling them I loved them like one would do with a lover in the afterglow of making love.

When I got dressed again and went out to the kitchen, Gary was sitting at the table with his journal and writing in it while talking out loud about what he was writing.

"The Subject has been an excellent application of my theory that the emotion of love can be stimulated and created in people, thus proving it is no more than chemical reactions that combine to produce the effect known as 'love.' Subject Kasey has, through three days of constant stimulation and alterations of the brain and body chemistry, reached the point where he has actually fallen in love with his own legs. While he already had an unnatural high fascination with them, and in showing them off, he is now showing signs of uncontrollable passion and strong feelings of what is commonly considered to be 'romantic love.' Now Day Four, the subject has been taken off all three of the pharmaceuticals used to manipulate him and continues to show the passion and romantic love for his legs that he did before he was taken off the pharmaceuticals."

I stood there, looked exhausted and happy, as I stood in my heels and short shorts watching Gary work and talk.

"Hello, Kasey," Gary said as he closed his journal. "How about sucking my cock?"

"I would love to," I said and got down on my knees in front of him while he opened his pants and pulled out his cock and balls.

"Nice and slow," he said, "I like a blowjob that lasts all afternoon."

I smiled and got myself in closer so I could lick and kiss the full length of his flaccid cock. I smiled when I saw it start to react, becoming larger and fuller and harder. I licked hungrily at his balls and covered the big sack covered with gray pubic hair they sat in with long, wet kisses. By the time I made it back up to his cock it had made considerable progress towards full erect status and it only took my taking the head of it between my lips to cause it to fully stiffen.

I kept him going for as long as possible, alternating between taking his cock completely into my mouth and sucking its full length, licking and kissing my way up and down the shaft, sucking just the head while working the tip with my tongue, and lapping hungrily at his balls. I was pleased at how well I could keep him moaning and twitching for so long as I followed his instructions to give him a blowjob "that lasts all afternoon."

When at last I brought him to orgasm, it was an earth-shattering explosion made more intense by the prolonged build-up. As I felt him about to ejaculate, I took his cock deep into my mouth so he could shoot his load down my throat. I no longer gagged at all. It had become all too natural for me and my body had gotten very used to it.

I'd leave Gary's weird apartment with his strange and demented experiments with the two hundred dollars he gave me. I'd see him from time to time, watching me and writing in his journal as he made observations about my behavior and lifestyle, but we never got together again.

I got a room at the cheesy hotel and buy needed supplies with the money he'd paid me. I worked the streets for the next three months, earning enough to keep my room and pay for other expenses like food, clothing, beauty supplies and condoms. I always kept a lot of condoms on hand. I got to know the girls who worked the streets, as well as one very slightly built man with boyish looks who also survived through prostituting himself.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 12



Most of my peers saw hooking as a job, a way to make money and stay alive. I was the only one who seemed to enjoy being paid to give head and take it up the ass. It made me happy when men who picked me up remarked that I seemed to enjoy what I was doing, because I did.

I had my share of bad johns, but I preferred to remember the good ones. My favorites were businessmen and married men who were nervous about admitting they wanted to be with a girl like me. My absolute favorite was a very short, balding man who wanted to lick my legs and paid me for the privilege of doing so. He licked and kissed one leg while I kissed and licked the other until we both came so hard from jerking off while doing so that we both fell off my bed hyperventilating.

Then, after three weeks, a familiar car pulled up along the curb where I was working. At first I was completely surprised, but then I came to realize it was all part of his plan. Mr. Smith had come to take me home.

"Get your stuff," he told me. "You've learned your lesson."

Without question, I went up to my room, gathered my meager possessions and brought them out to Mr. Smith's car. I tossed them in the back seat and got into the car.

"You're filthy," he said with a frown. "You've got bruises on your arms and legs and too much makeup on."

"I'm sorry, sir."

"I hope you protected yourself while whoring," he sighed. "I'll have to take you to the doctor for tests, and that costs money."

"I tried my best, sir, but I didn't think you were coming back. I had to earn a living."

"And you will have to continue earning a living, doing the only thing you're good for," Mr. Smith told me. "You'll keep whoring, but in safer conditions with a better class of people."

"Yes sir."

I found myself unable to feel anything other than happiness as a result of Mr. Smith's reappearance in my life. After three months working the streets and living in a cockroach infested hotel in a room without hot water, I was looking forward to living with Mr. Smith again. The reality of my life had hit me hard when I was on the streets in a distant city selling my body to strangers. I had no real friends, no family, no job and no prospects. What I had was a pair of gorgeous legs and the ability to suck cock better than anyone my men had ever met along with an ass that could take a pounding all night and get back in action the very next morning.

It was a very long drive, and it was very late when we got back to Mr. Smith's house. I had fallen asleep for much of the drive, and when I got home the thing I wanted most was to take a hot shower. After I did, Mr. Smith was waiting for me in the kitchen. He had a large appointment book, the kind used by executives, and flipped it open casually.

"You are going to start making regular appointments with men. Some will be men you know, repeat customers, and others will be new clients. You'll be advertising online and in a special little underground newspaper I know about. You will schedule your first appointment of the day at eight in the morning. The second will be at ten, the third at noon, the fourth at two in the afternoon, and then every two hours until your last appointment at midnight. If there are any openings in the schedule, you will work very hard to fill them by any means necessary. If you cannot find a paying client, you will start offering freebies to men in the chat rooms you used to flirt with. Each client will get whatever services he wants and is willing to pay for, but they will be checked out by me and no one fucks you without a condom except me and certain men I say are okay. You will be available for threesomes with two men and more as requested. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir," I said quietly.

"If you don't like it I can take you back to that filthy hotel and you can go back to working the streets."

"Yes sir, thank you sir," I said very audibly.

"You will have two days off per week. Those days off will be as I schedule them and they will never be on weekends. One of those days will be for you to relax and take care of yourself, to make sure you keep looking sexy and desirable. The other day will be for shopping, errands, and work around the house such as cleaning. On your days off you will still service me and friends of mine as needed. You will make me breakfast and dinner each day and lunch when I am home. You will keep the house clean, orderly and to my liking. In short, you will do as you are told, and you will be my whore, my maid and my serving girl. Understood?"

"Yes sir."

"Get some sleep. You'll have tomorrow off, but we're going to the doctor. She's a friend of mine. She'll check you for STDs and give you a whole physical and workup and then start you on this new hormone therapy to help you become more feminine. You'll be a very lucky little slut, as her methods are rather extreme when it comes to hormones and while they'd never be approved by the FDA or whatever, they produce some amazing effects while causing, shall we say, a lot of damage to parts of you that aren't going to matter much anyway now that you've started your new life."

I'm grateful, sir, I really am, but what kind of damage?"

"Well, after a while you'll never be able to get your little pee pee hard again, but most of the damage will be to your brain. You'll still be able to service men and do your chores, but from what she tells me, you won't be able to think for yourself or do much of anything else anymore."

I had a look of panic on my face, which made Mr. Smith smile broadly.

"One of the best things about this therapy is that, coupled with some nice implants, you are going to have a very beautiful rack of tits to go with those legs and that ass."

I smiled, and as I did I thought to myself how I might finally be truly happy for the first time in my life if these changes took hold in me. I could be more feminine, more desirable to men, and maybe I could finally shut off for good that part of my brain that kept telling me what I was doing was sick and wrong and wanted me to run away.

I was sick of that part of my brain and looked forward to shutting it up. There was nowhere to run away to.

I stood before him in my black teddy while he ran his hands along my thighs, up under my teddy where he fondled and squeezed my ass, and listened as he told me, "You are my perfect prize, the queen of all my princesses, and you are going to make me so very, very happy."

"May I suck your beautiful cock, master?"

"Beg for it."

I got down on all fours like a dog, panting and looking up at Mr. Smith lovingly. My voice became very whiny and pleading as I cried, "Please, master, please may I service your beautiful cock with my mouth? I know I'm not good enough for you and that I am a pathetic sissy but please, please, please let me suck your cock. I need your cock, I want your cock, I love having your cock in my mouth. Pretty please with sugar on top, please let me suck your cock, please!"

He dropped his pants and smiled.



Kasey's Confession Ch. 13



"Oh my goodness," was the first thing Dr. Dietz said when I walked into her office and she first laid eyes on me. "How terrible it must be for you, honey, to be trapped inside a man's body!"

"Yes ma'am."

"Mr. Smith tells me you are very shy when it comes to talking to people, especially women, but I have his full report on you already. The only thing still open to discussion is exactly what course of treatment I will use to cure you of your unwanted maleness. I would like to try the most radical treatment schedule I've ever tried, and you would be a perfect subject."

"You can make me into a woman?" I asked, sounding very excited.

"Well, not exactly," she said as she shined a pen light in my eyes and had me look up and down, left and right. "A woman is strong, confident and independent. In most cases, anyway, and that isn't what we want to create in you. Your goal is to become the most perfect sexual being, focused only on pleasing others, and having the perfect body to go with the desire."

"So, I could have breasts and a vagina?"

"Strip for me," she said and waited until I started before continuing. "Why do you want a vagina and breasts?"

"A vagina would be another hole for me to take cock into my body," I explained, "and if I had breasts then more men would notice me and want to have sex with me."

"That is the most honest answer I've ever gotten on that question," Dr. Dietz told me. "It is very obvious that you are a very highly sexually charged woman trapped in a very shy and awkward man's body. I do need to understand a little better about your nature before we start treatments."

"Whatever you need to know, Doctor, just ask," I replied.

"Stand there with just your panties on," she told me before walking over to the door to the room and opening it wide enough so she could talk to someone on the other side. "Erik? Ross? I need the two of you for a little while."

I stood there in just my pink thong panties, with my painted finger and toenails, my "cocksucker" tattoo and my completely smooth and tanned body, waiting for whatever Dr. Dietz wanted. Two men in scrubs walked into the room and closed the door behind them.

Dr. Dietz was wearing a lab coat and long skirt with heels. She sat on the edge of her desk and started hiking up her skirt, up above the top line of her stockings, revealing a garter belt and crotch-less panties. She had me come closer and look at her exposed, smooth-shaved vagina.

"What do you think of when you look at my vagina?" she asked. "Do you want to lick it or do you wish you had one like it between your legs?"

"I wish I had one as beautiful as yours, Doctor."

"Very good," she said and turned to her assistants. "Erik, take down your pants."

The first of her assistants, Erik, pulled down his scrub pants and revealed his cock and balls. His cock was limp, but sizable, and he seemed completely unemotional about exposing himself.

"What do you think of when you see Erik's cock?" Dr. Dietz asked. "Do you want to suck on it or do you wish you had one as big as his?"

"Oh gosh, I want to suck the hell out of it!" I yelled out, and turning to Erik I put my hand over my heart and said, "You have a GORGEOUS cock."

Dr. Dietz had Ross drop his pants and expose his cock, which was even larger than Erik's, but also hung limp.

She turned to me and asked, "Looking at my vagina and Ross' cock, would you rather have your penis in my vagina or Ross' cock in your ass?"

"Oh gosh, I would LOVE to have Ross fuck me!" I squealed. "Oh gosh, Ross," I said, looking at him, "You can fuck me ANYTIME, sweetie!"

Ross and Eric stood very still and barely registered any emotion. It was like they were just part of whatever examination Dr. Dietz was performing on me. 

I was drooling as I stared at the two well hung assistants, who stood there silently and unemotionally while Dr. Dietz asked me questions. I kept answering her truthfully, but could not look away from the two men. Slowly, they were beginning to experience arousal. The longer I stared at them, staring down at their exposed genitals, the more their cocks began to slowly, but undeniably, get erect.

After her questions, which went on for more than an hour, Dr. Dietz began telling me about her radical program. It involved regular injections and pills to create hormonal change in a way that was considered extreme by most physicians. She also recommended I begin seeing a voice coach to learn to speak in a more feminine way because, as she said, "talking like a limp-wristed fairy boy is not the same as talking like a woman." There would be an exercise program to help me develop my muscles in a more feminine way, as well as plastic surgery, and, once the hormones started to produce breasts on my body, breast implants that would give me very pronounced, large breasts.

The two assistants, who were now more than halfway to a full erection, pulled up their scrub pants and, at Dr. Dietz's instruction, led me into another room. I was still wearing only my thong panties and I was walked past a number of people, all of whom either smiled or greeted me with a "hello, sweetie" as I passed.

In the other room was a comfortable recliner, which they had me sit on while an IV bottle on a stand was wheeled over to me. One of the assistants tapped on my arm, told me to make a fist, and then pierced my arm with a needle. The contents of the IV bottle were slowly fed into my bloodstream.

"This will give us a head start on the procedure, which will take time," Dr. Dietz told me. "I'll be back in an hour or two to check on you."

She walked out of the room, leaving me with the two assistants standing on either side of me while whatever was in the IV bottle pumped into my bloodstream.

Ross was standing very close to my left arm, the one without a needle in it, so I reached up tentatively towards his crotch. I could see the bulge in his scrubs and I wanted to feel it. He did not move away or in any way react to my busy little hand, so I started gently rubbing his almost fully erect cock with the back of my hand.

"Can I suck it?" I asked.

"If you like," he said very monotone voice.

I started to rub it with the palm of my hand and it became fully erect, so I wrapped my fingers around it through the scrubs and very slowly stroked it. He seemed to have some trouble keeping his balance, but did not otherwise react, so I untied his scrub pants and unceremoniously dropped them to the floor.

"You have a really nice cock," I purred as I leaned over to kiss it.

Erik held onto my right arm, making sure I didn't pull out the needle, as I leaned in closer and began licking Ross' cock up and down, tasting every inch of it from every angle as I moved it around with my left hand. Then I wrapped my fingers tightly around the base of it and drew the head towards my mouth.

"I really LOVE sucking cock," I told him before taking the head of his cock between my lips and gently moaning.

As I worked on the head of his cock with my lips and tongue, Ross began shifting about, having some difficulty standing, which made me very happy. I didn't like that he just stood there in the doctor's office having no reaction to my beautiful legs. Being in love with my legs as much as I was, I did not like it when they went unappreciated.

I didn't notice Dr. Dietz coming back into the room until I heard her clear her throat. I let Ross' cock slip out of my mouth and leaned back into the recliner feeling like I'd been caught with my hand in the cookie jar.

"That didn't take long," she said while Ross pulled up his pants and retied them.

Dr. Dietz was now wearing only black lace panties, a matching bra and her heels. She walked along beside my chair, brushed my hair away from my face, and smiled at me.

"I'm sorry if I did wrong," I stammered, "I just have trouble resisting and your assistants have such gorgeous cocks."

"Do you think I'm attractive?" she asked.

Dr. Dietz was probably in her late 40s or early 50s. She was someone athletic, her body was very toned and she had long legs and firm breasts that looked like they might hold their own without the benefit of a bra. As she ran her fingertips along my forehead and along the side of my face, she asked the question again.

"Do you find me attractive? Do you think I'm beautiful?" she asked.

"You are a very beautiful woman," I replied. "Any man would be lucky to be with you."

"Not you?"

"I'm not really a man."

"I used to be a man, just like you, Kasey," she went on to say. "When I was in medical school I started to question my sexuality and my gender identity. I dated women, but it never worked out and I know now I always left them feeling empty and unsatisfied. I started dating men, but I wanted to feel like a woman does when she has a man deep inside her, and so I focused myself on how to turn myself into the woman I really was. It took me years before I looked anything like I do now, and I think that is terribly unfair. I wanted to make it easier, and quicker, for girls like us to find our true selves, so I devoted my medical career to new, transformative methods. Unfortunately, medical science is far behind the curve on this, and they don't approve of my methods because of the side effects. But honestly, Kasey, side effects be damned, we want what we want and we need what we need."

"Yes, doctor, I agree completely."

"One of the side effects of my program is that, because of the reduced time frame of change, your libido will end up flying wildly off the charts. In other words, you will constantly be horny and no matter how many times you orgasm, you won't be satisfied."

"I'm pretty much like that already," I confessed.

"Well, Lord help you after I finish your treatments and you've had your surgery. You are going to be one crazy cock-hungry bitch. They'll have to keep you in a cage," she said with a laugh.

The image in my mind resulting from her description caused me to jolt back with a combination of fear and excitement.

"Why don't we share," Dr. Dietz said as she crouched down next to Ross, untied and dropped his pant. "You ever suck cock with a friend?"

"No, ma'am, I never..."

"Lean over carefully," she said. "Don't pull out the IV."

As I leaned back towards Ross, Dr. Dietz took his cock in her hand and licked the tip of it, her tongue flickering like a serpent's. Then she pointed it in the direction of my mouth and I did the same.

"Isn't cock fabulous?" she asked as we passed Ross' cock back and forth between us. "How can anyone NOT like sucking cock?"

"I know," I said before pulling Ross' cock into my mouth and sucking back and forth on as much of it I could given the position I was in before letting her take it back. "If only people would get over themselves and suck one they would realize it is like the best thing ever!"

"I was submissive before my transition was complete," Dr. Dietz said before taking a long suck on the full length of Ross' cock. "Now I am more dominant than submissive, but put me under a man in the bedroom and I get all those submissive feelings back again."

We took turns sucking back and forth on Ross' cock, and I was jealous at how Dr. Dietz, in her crouched position, could get much more of his cock in her mouth than I could. I struggled from where I was, in the recliner with a needle in my arm and my arm being held stationary by the silent and unemotional Erik.

"This isn't very... um... professional, is it?" I asked as I looked deeply into Dr. Dietz's eyes while our tongues ran back and forth along opposite sides of the length of Ross' penis.

"Professionalism be damned," she said, "I lost my medical license years ago. Fuck the rules."

With that she slid her lips over the head of Ross' cock and enveloped it completely with her mouth. I was amazed by her passion and her skill as she worked it back and forth while her tongue seemed to be moving rapidly inside her mouth, jabbing out her cheeks and her lower lip. Ross was now visibly unnerved by the attention and unable to keep standing and maintaining his calm, unaffected demeanor. He was jerking wildly and grabbing onto the back of my recliner and, alternatively, Dr. Dietz's head for support.

Dr. Dietz slid her mouth off of Ross' cock, smiled and let out a long, deep breath and pointed it towards me. Ross stepped in closer, and I wrapped my lips around the head and tried to envelope the length of it with the same kind of passion. Once I did, I sucked back and forth on it with all the passion I could muster. Trying to copy Dr. Dietz's technique, I tried moving my tongue around, inside my mouth as I sucked Ross' cock, licking furiously and desperately at it as it slid back and forth. It was an amazing feeling once I got my lips, my tongue, my throat, and my entire mouth working like an orchestra to please this man whose cock I had the great honor of sucking.

I could not finish and get Ross off. After several minutes I became extremely lightheaded and Dr. Dietz helped me to lie back down on the recliner.

"It's the hormone treatment," she said calmly, "best not to exert yourself while you getting this part of it. We'll only do the IV once, after that it is single injections and pills. Just rest for a minute."

I felt very tired. I nodded and closed my eyes to stop the room from spinning.

My weekly treatment day would become my regular day off, as it would exhaust me and leave me weak and confused. I would come in to Dr. Dietz's office every week for a serious of injections. During the week I would take a handful of pills each morning and every night. I could feel the changes happening in my body. My skin felt softer, I didn't have to shave as often, and there was a significant reduction in my ability to get and maintain and erection.

My days were kept very busy with a full schedule of men and chores. I'd have my first appointment at 8 am, which was usually a man looking for a quick blowjob on the way to work, and then make breakfast for Mr. Smith, usually around 9am. I'd then give Mr. Smith head after he finished eating and he'd either go off to work or retreat to his home office at the far end of the house. At 10 am I'd have my second "date" of the day, which would also usually just be a blowjob, but not as rushed as the 8 am suck and run.

At noon I'd have my third appointment after making lunch for Mr. Smith, if he was home, or just making it for myself. My noon date was usually on his lunch hour and it would be another quickie, but quite often my lunch date would want a quick fuck as well and my only question would be, "What position would you like me in, sir?"

My 2 pm date sometimes didn't happen, especially once I started having appointments other doctors.

One doctor performed an intense hair removal laser surgery that removed all my body and facial hair. I had plastic surgery to make my Adam's apple all but invisible and to make my face more feminine. After three months of voice coaching, I also had surgery that permanently altered my voice to an almost annoying high-pitched squeak.

Some of my surgeries would interfere with an entire day's worth of appointments, or even more than one day, but Mr. Smith told me that was okay.

My 4 pm appointment was often someone who had just gotten out of work and needed to unwind. He usually wanted snacks and beer, which I gladly provided, and we would very casually work up to me going down on him. My 4 pm date rarely fucked me. It was usually just someone who needed to relax after a stressful date and needed some good head to help him do so. My 6 pm appointment was usually the same sort of man.

My last three dates of the day were usually the most intense. I would be tired and worn out, but my dates would be filled with energy and high expectations. Often they would be dates with multiple men. One of the most common scenarios involved guys I'd had appointments with solo bringing a friend or two to meet me, or as they took to calling it, "cumming to meat me."

For the next year I would suck between ten and fifteen cocks a day and get my ass fucked five or six times. After my last date of the evening, Mr. Smith would always come to my bedroom and give me a good hard fuck to send me off to my dreams, and when I woke up it all began again, unless it was a day where I saw one of my doctors.

Dr. Dietz's "treatments" affected me in ways she brushed off as "meaningless side effects." I became easily confused, had trouble figuring out simple things like how to use a key to unlock a door, and my long term memory became almost non-existent while my short term memory became selective. I could remember to make breakfast for Mr. Smith every morning, but when I went outside to pick up the morning paper, I'd get outside and be unable to remember why I was out there. Then I would see a pretty flower or a butterfly and stand and stare at it for a half hour while Mr. Smith's eggs burned.

My happiest moment was when my breasts began to bud. They had been forming for some time, but one morning it was undeniable. I loved wearing "training bras" with my real breasts instead of wearing a bra stuffed with socks or rubber breast forms. After they blossomed into small, well-rounded peaches, Dr. Dietz sent me in for breast implants, which were very uncomfortable for many weeks because Mr. Smith wanted me to have big, but very firm, tits that would command every man's attention.

It took almost a year before my transformation was complete, with the final step being surgery on my genitals. When it was done, I had a realistic looking vagina, although it had very big and heavy lips, as well as what remained of my penis in place of a clitoris. Over the course of the therapy, my penis had shriveled up and with surgery it was somehow reduced to just the sickly head of what remained sticking out above the opening in my vagina. It looked rather absurd, but it made me appear to be a very unique woman rather than any kind of man.

"Don't use it for a while," Dr. Dietz told me, referring to my new vagina. "It needs time to properly heal before it becomes the kind of cock receptacle you want it to be."

When I walked out to do shopping and errands in my short shorts like I always did, now wearing makeup and long, painted fingernails and a very feminine hairstyle, things were different. Where it used to be that one or maybe two men would look at me in a lustful way, every man was now looking at me that way.

One morning I was out shopping for groceries when I saw a very handsome man checking me out from down the aisle. I had my shopping list in my hand, along with the pen I used to cross off the things I'd already put in my cart, and acted as if I didn't notice him while occasionally giving him a little smile. Doing the weekly grocery shopping took up most of limited brain power as there was so much to remember, and if I didn't remember to cross off something on the list, like coffee or tomatoes, I'd have to dig through my cart to find them or end up buying the same thing twice.

While my handsome admirer was watching me, I was trying to read my list but having trouble understanding some of the bigger words Mr. Smith had written on the list, such as "linguini" and "provolone." I tended to read more difficult words aloud so I could figure out what they were based on how they sounded when I said them.

I was in the produce section, saying the word "cantaloupe" over and over, mispronouncing it badly and getting very frustrated as I stood over racks filled with different kinds of apples looking for one that had the name "cantaloupe" on a sign over it. I got exasperated and worried about letting Mr. Smith down, and I started to cry when my admirer approached me.

"Are you okay?" he asked, looking both concerned about what was upsetting me and happy at having an opportunity to approach me that didn't consist of a pick-up line.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 13



I wiped aside my tears with my fingers, almost poking one of my eyes out with my long red fingernails, brushed my long, bleach-blonde hair out of my face, and held out the list to him. I pointed at the word "cantaloupe" and asked him if he knew what it was. My list was broken down into sections, and cantaloupe was in the produce section, so I knew I was in the right place. I just couldn't remember what it was or what it looked like.

"Over here, sweetie," he told me as he walked over to a neighboring aisle and picked up a cantaloupe.

"Oh gosh, thank you," I said and pushed my cart over to where he was standing with the cantaloupe. "Is that a good one?"

"I think so," he laughed. "It doesn't look bruised or soft or anything."

I leaned over him and looked at the sign above the small pile of cantaloupes. It was small, but I could see the word and read it out loud, mispronouncing it as I did so. "Con-tell-loopies," I read and giggled.

"You never had one before?" the man asked after pronouncing it correctly for me.

"I don't remember," I said honestly. "It is a funny word."

"I'm Bill," he smiled and placed the cantaloupe in my cart. "Are you married?"

I giggled at the thought, much more audibly than could be considered normal under the circumstances, and told him, "Gosh no, I'm not married."

"Boyfriend?"

The thought also made me giggle out loud. "I live with a man."

"So, is it serious?"

"I don't know," I said as I bit my lip and started getting very confused by his line of questioning. "He likes to see me with other men."

"Really," replied Bill, looking very contemplative. "He likes watching?"

"Sometimes," I told him as I pushed my cart onward and looked down at my list.

"You can cross off the cantaloupe," Bill suggested, helpfully.

"Oh gosh, you are right. I got that, didn't I?" I giggled as I put a line through the word with my pen.

"So," Bill continued once I crossed off the cantaloupe and slipped my pen under my bra strap for safe keeping, "Your boyfriend likes to watch you with other men?"

"He's a voyager, but not all the time, just sometimes he likes voyaging."

"Voyaging? You mean he's a voyeur?"

"A voy her? Huh?"

"It means someone who watches other people having sex."

"Oh yeah, he does that sometimes. Not all the time, but sometimes. I love sex."

I found the next item on my list and gleefully showed Bill how I'd found the potatoes all on my own.

"So, would this boyfriend of yours have a problem with me asking you out to dinner?"

I blushed. "Dinner? You want to take me out to dinner?"

"Is that wrong?" he asked as I put the potatoes in my cart and pushed onward. "Don't forget to cross off the potatoes on your list."

I pulled out my pen, crossed off the potatoes, and smiled at Bill. "I get hit on a lot and men usually want to screw me or get me to blow them. I don't mind, I love getting sex, but I'm not used to getting asked out to dinner."

Bill stopped me, put his hand on my arm and turned me so he could look into my eyes. "You are a very strikingly beautiful woman. You are tall with those gorgeous long legs and a killer body. I don't doubt a lot of men want to get you in bed and I'm sure a lot of them have. I'd just like a little bit more."

"You mean like a rela... um, what's the word, I can't remember too good. Like boyfriending me?"

Bill laughed. "You are so cute. Why don't we finish your shopping together and I'll help you with the bags and we can talk about dinner."

With Bill's help I finished shopping much more quickly than I did normally. I got my cart to the checkout line and Bill excused himself and walked over towards a quiet corner and took out a cell phone. I watched as he made a call while smiling and holding up his index finger to indicate he'd only be a minute.

As the checkout girl rang up my purchases, I glanced back and forth between my items and Bill. I could hear him talking on his cell phone quite clearly although I was sure he thought his call was completely private.

"Yeah, Terry, you wouldn't believe this chick I just met at the supermarket. Talk about a ditzy blonde, this one is dumb as a brick and she wants me to take her to dinner."

I bit my lip as I tried to determine if he was talking about me or not. I felt bad about listening in on his conversation and turned back to the checkout girl. She was looking at me dismissively, as if she thought I was pathetic and stupid, so I looked away. My attention eventually drifted back to Bill's cell phone conversation.

"She's got great tits and this amazing ass, gorgeous long legs, long blonde hair and really pretty blue eyes, even if you can tell there isn't anything going on behind them," Bill was telling his friend, laughing at the last part. "Anyway, I won't have any problem getting this one in the sack after dinner, so I'm going to miss the game tonight. We cool?"

I tried to sort out what he was talking about in his mind, but all I could think about was whether or not he was talking about me. I really wasn't sure and I felt really badly about listening in.

Once the girl gave me the final tally on my purchases, I paid with Mr. Smith's credit card and prepared to push my cart out to the car. Bill came with me, helped me load the bags into the car and then followed me home, where he helped me unload and put the groceries away.

Mr. Smith wasn't home and it was an hour until my next appointment to have sex with a man, so I grabbed Bill's hand and squeezed it while saying, "How about we forget dinner and just fuck?"

We started kissing, and as it became heated and passionate, I realized Bill was the first man I'd been with who didn't know I had been born a man. That made it feel so much different, so much more like a natural passion that came from mutual attraction rather than a man seeing a guy in girlie clothing desperate to get dick.

Mr. Smith had wanted to be the first to fuck me properly, in my new vagina, but once we started kissing and I could feel Bill's hands roaming all over my body I knew I wanted it to be him. I wanted it to be a man who was drawn to me as a woman, who believed I was a natural born woman, and who wouldn't know any different.

I took him by the hand into my bedroom. Sitting on the edge of my bed, I began to get undressed while he took off his clothes in front of me.

While in the process of pulling down my shorts, I felt incredibly light-headed and grabbed onto Bill and my nightstand for support. It wasn't enough. The room was spinning, I could not think or even remember my name, and I fell to the floor as everything went black.

When I was able to see again, and after my eyes focused, I was lying in a hospital bed. There were two women standing alongside me who looked familiar, but I couldn't remember their names or what they meant to me. One was a relatively tall blonde and the other was a short woman with curly brown hair who, upon seeing me open my eyes, told the blonde to "get the doctor."

When the doctor came in, it was Dr. Dietz. She looked very concerned as she looked at me and then looked at the monitors I was hooked up to. She examined my eyes very quickly with a pen light and then asked me a question.

"How are you feeling, Keith?"

I didn't know who "Keith" was and I assumed I'd been in the hospital after passing out during my attempt to have sex with a man I met in the supermarket. I couldn't remember his name, but I remembered things getting pretty heated in my bedroom.

"I don't know," I said. "I have a really bad headache."

"You've been in a coma for quite a while," she told me. "Take it easy for now and I'll be back in a while."

I nodded silently. Looking down at myself I could see that I no longer had breasts and could see chest hair peeking out from under my hospital gown. I could also feel the presence of a penis and testicles between my legs.

"Take it easy with him," the doctor told the two women. "If he starts to look really fatigued or shows any signs of serious confusion, come and get me immediately.

"Okay, Dr. Bennett, thank you," said the curly haired woman.

"I'm going to go call Lisa," the blonde said. "She'll freak out when she finds out her boyfriend woke up."

"I told her to never give up," said the shorter woman, who then turned back to me, brushed my hair back and away from my face and asked, "Do you remember me?"



Kasey's Confession Ch. 14



Lying in the hospital bed, hooked up to monitors and who knows what else, I just stared out in shock. It was to be expected, they said, as they explained I had been in a coma for a very long time. What they did not know was that the source of my confusion ran much deeper than just waking up disoriented after a long time "away."

I had absolutely no idea who I was, but when one of my legs was uncovered when I knocked the sheet off of myself, I recoiled in horror. It was covered with hair.

Dr. Bennett, who looked exactly like Dr. Dietz but acted nothing like her, checked on me regularly. I found out the two women who had been at my bedside when I regained consciousness were named Marci and Erica. They were apparently close friends of mine I had known for many years, but while they seemed familiar, I was unable to remember them as being part of my life.

I was having trouble remembering any part of my life. The only life I could remember was the one I lived as Kasey, which was apparently some kind of delusion or dream.

When Lisa, the woman who was supposedly my girlfriend, arrived, she looked exactly like Nancy. She wore tight cut-offs and a tight t-shirt just like Nancy did, even though her bulging, very overweight body looked absurd hanging out of the shorts and her much too short tight t-shirt. She also didn't wear a bra, which made her very pronounced nipples with very wide and dark areolas easily visible through the fabric of her t-shirt.

"Hunny bunny!" she shrieked when she saw me sitting up awake in my hospital bed. "My wuvvy dovey sweetie pie! Your sweet cheeks has missed you so berry berry much!"

She started kissing me all over my face and calling me every pet name imaginable while talking in the voice of a hyperactive little girl who had just inhaled the contents of a helium balloon.

After she finally stopped kissing me, I struggled to say, "I missed you, too" while wondering who she was and how I could have ended up in a relationship with someone like her. I also struggled to deal with her as "Lisa" since whenever I looked at her I thought of Nancy and how hard I had worked to prove my love to her.

Over time my memory began to come back to me. Lisa and I had been together for over three years. Marci was a friend I'd known since childhood, and Erica was a friend of hers from work she'd introduced me to a couple of years earlier. Erica and I had fallen in love along the way, but we had never acted on our feelings for each other because I wouldn't cheat on Lisa. Erica had told me she wouldn't love me the way she did if I were the type of person to cheat on my girlfriend.

Several times I had tried to break up with Lisa, but she always became extremely emotional and at one time even threatened to kill herself. She was completely emotionally dependent on me, and over the course of our relationship she had stopped taking care of herself, gained a lot of weight, started dressing provocatively in ways that made her a public laughing stock, had drifted away from all her friends and her family, and spent most of her time sitting in front of the television eating cookies and candy and other snacks while going on endless about how much she loved me in a babyish voice.

When I was finally released from the hospital and returned to the live I lived with Lisa, I became completely miserable and enraged. I told her I wanted to break up and that I didn't love her any longer, but she only smiled and told me in her baby girl voice, "Hunny bunny just have to 'member all da wuv we have 'tween us!"

She infuriated me. The situation infuriated me. Having a man's body with hairy legs infuriated me. Not being able to get any cock infuriated me more than anything else.

I got back a job with the company I'd worked for before spending months in a coma. Although it was not the same job I'd had, which was filled by a new hire since they had no idea if I would ever be able to come back, I got the same pay rate, kept my seniority and benefits. It was almost as if I had never left.

On my first Friday back I felt compelled to go to a nearby shopping mall and order from the Chinese restaurant on their food court. I took it back to a table next to a railing that surrounded a water fountain. It all felt very familiar and I did it out of a sense that it was what I always did on Fridays.

Right after I sat down, Erica, dressed in professional looking clothes, sat down across from me.

"I wondered if you'd remember," she said.

"I didn't know why, but I knew it was important to come here today."

She put her hand over mine and sighed. "Every Friday we used to meet and every Friday we used to say, 'we have to stop doing this' and whatever else we always used to say. You'll never leave Lisa and I, well, I have started seeing Chris again. He's talking about getting married."

I sat quietly while she talked, looking away from me the entire time, and then told her, "I cannot stand Lisa. I don't know how I put up with her before I was in that coma, but she makes me sick. She's ALWAYS using that baby talk voice and squealing and calling me 'hunny bunny' and 'snugglekins" and shit like that. And she sits there half-naked on the couch all night eating boxes and boxes of cookies and candy and junk food and chewing with her mouth open and going 'yummy, yummy, yummy in my tummy' and I am about three minutes away from throwing up whenever I'm home with her and it is even worse when we go out."

"You got her to see a therapist before your accident," Erica told me, "and then all hell broke loose. You need to leave her. Not just for me, but for your own sanity."

"What I really need is to suck—" I stopped suddenly and looked around until I spotted an ice cream place. "I need to suck on an ice cream cone."

"Um, okay? Are you going to eat this lo mein?"

"No, I just really need something, I don't know, long and hard and wet in my mouth. It is kind of a weird craving. Do they sell those chocolate covered bananas anywhere around here?"

Erica stared at me, speechless. "Are you okay?"

"Just some weird cravings, I don't know," I told her before slumping back into my chair. "Look, I barely remember anything about Lisa other than we've been together for a long time. I don't remember you very well either, but when I see you I feel butterflies in my chest. The thing is, I'm really confused right now and I'm trying to work things out."

"You should see that therapist that Dr. Bennett recommended. I think his name was Duckworth?"

"Yeah, I have his card. I've been meaning to call him."

"He's a psychiatrist, I think, not a therapist, but you should probably see him. It couldn't hurt. And just so you know, I was the one who found you when you were in the accident. You laughed and told me you lost control of the car because you saw me riding past on my bicycle in my pink shorts. Then you told me you loved me. And just so you know, I love you, too."

Even with my limited memories I could see what the picture was. I'd been trapped in a miserable, unhealthy relationship with Lisa for years, and every time I tried to end it she did something crazy like try to kill herself or get drunk and have sex with some random guy in a bar, which I somehow remembered her doing. Before my coma I had been totally head over heels in love with Erica, and the feeling was mutual, but we'd never consummated our passion or even kissed other than a quick one on the cheek, which Erica gave me as she got up and left.

The choice seemed simple, the beautiful and sane blonde who had it all together and loved me, or the emotionally unbalanced woman I'd been with for over three years who was trying to eat herself to death when she wasn't trying to destroy herself by more dramatic means.

It only seemed simple, because no one knew about the thing that was really eating away at me. I wanted to be Kasey. I wanted to rush home and shave my legs and put on a pair of short shorts and prance around town looking for men to hook up with. 

I'd also seen where that kind of thing could lead me, or at least where it had led in the dream or whatever I had experience while in a coma. 

Dammit, though, I was having extremely serious cravings for cock, but as long as I was walking around in men's pants and a men's polo shirt and shoes the idea was repulsive. I wanted there to be a phone booth I could jump into and transform into Kasey instantly.

When I got home, Lisa was wearing a black teddy that was several sizes too small for her. It stretched tightly around her body and she was hanging out of it in a way that was both grotesque and somehow incredibly appealing to me. I was immediately reminded of Nancy and how they looked exactly the same, even as their behavior was radically different.

"We haven't made love since you came back to me, hunny bunny," she squealed upon seeing me and then jumped up on me, knocking me onto the floor. "Give it to me, my big strong manly man! Gimme your wuv stick!"

I pushed her off me and started yelling at her, "I can't do this shit anymore! I don't want to be with you! I want out of this relationship! I can't take it anymore!"

She sat on the floor looking at me. She was crying. I shook my head.

"Hunny bunny, what's wrong? Did you have a baddy bad day at worky poo?"

"No! I had a great day at work! Do you understand, I don't want to be your boyfriend anymore. I am moving out. I'll go stay in a hotel or whatever tonight and figure it out, but I can't stay with you any longer."

"But hunny bunny! I wuv you!"

"Shut the fuck up and leave me alone."

After I went into the bedroom and started to throw my clothes in a suitcase, she came and stood in the doorway watching me.

After a few minutes she quietly said, "Is it because of Erica?"

"No."

"Why then? You were in a coma all that time and you don't remember how good we were together. You need time to remember."

I was pleased that she actually started talking in a grown woman's voice, but it didn't cause me to stop packing or even slow down. I went through my closet taking just what I thought I'd need until I could come back for the rest of my things, and then I found a shoebox that was held closed with duct tape.

"What's this?" I asked as I held up the box where she could see it.

She shrugged and indicated she had no idea what it was, so I pulled it open and looked inside. There were two women's shavers with replaceable razor heads, a bottle moisturizing lotion, a bottle of self-tanning oil and a dildo. I quickly closed the box and added it to the things I was taking with me.

"Don't do anything stupid," I told her as I brushed past her to take my things out to the car. "I'll be back in a few days for the rest of my stuff."

She stood on the front lawn, still wearing her much too small teddy, and watched me drive away.

I got a room in a fairly decent motel not far from where I worked. I unpacked my suitcase and my attention kept going to the shoebox. I took one of the razors with me and went into the bathroom, turned on the shower and began shaving my legs. Starting with one legs I worked my way up my calves, over and around my knees, shaved my thighs completely, did the best job I could with my ass under the circumstances, and then toweled off. Then I applied the lotion to my legs and went back out to the room in just my bathrobe.

"Damn, that feels SO MUCH BETTER," I told myself out loud.

For the next week, every day after work I went out looking for more supplies to help me transform into Kasey. I bought short shorts, miniskirts, toenail polish, high-heeled shoes, and anything else I could find so I could look and feel like I'd felt like when I was Kasey. I held off on makeup and anything to style my hair as I didn't feel quite ready to attempt something that, as far as I knew, I'd never tried in my real life that was so difficult and complex.

I practiced sucking on the dildo every night before I went to bed, finding I loved sucking it as much as I had during my coma experience or whatever had happened to me. I wanted to find a real cock to suck, but I was nervous and unsure of myself.

The following Friday I went to the mall on my lunch break and ordered food from the Chinese restaurant at the food court. I sat by the waterfall and waited to see if Erica would show up, and she did.

"You could have called me, you know," she said as she sat down, wearing big sunglasses with dark lenses.

"I didn't remember your number," I confessed. "Or where you lived."

"You remembered we met here every Friday."

"Yes, but I didn't remember why I felt compelled to come here."

"Okay, I'll give you that, but you're not going to be able to play the coma card forever," she said as she reached out and took my hand in hers. "So, you finally moved out on her."

"Yes. I have to go back and get the rest of my stuff this weekend, but it is over, and she seems to be handling it pretty well considering the crap you said she pulled before."

"She's convinced you either need time to get your shit together after being in that coma for so long, or that you left her for me. She called me a couple times."

"What did you tell her?"

"I told her the truth, that I hadn't seen you, that I didn't know you left her, and that as far as I knew you didn't leave her for me."

"Do you really love me?" I asked Erica.

"I think you know that I do," she said and grasped my hand tightly. "Or at least you used to know that I do."

"I want to show you something tonight, if you're willing to come by my motel room. It is something I want to share with someone, but I'm really scared of being laughed at or rejected."

"You mean you aren't just trying to get me up to your room to get me into bed?" she laughed.

"Well, I am very attracted to you and I really feel like I can trust you. I remember you from before my coma, but in bits and pieces, and I'm pretty sure I do love you. I'm just really confused."

"Whatever you want, Kasey, except one thing," she said. "I don't want to be the reason you leave Lisa, you should leave her because you don't want to be with her and because you don't love her. And I don't want you to make love to me once and then run back to her, because that would hurt. So, I guess that is actually two things."

"You aren't the reason I left her. That much I know for sure. When I came back and went back to living with her I was completely miserable and I couldn't stand being around her. I'm not going back to her. My thing is this, I need to share a secret with you before anything more happens between us, and I need to know you'll accept me and still love me after you know my secret."

"This sounds pretty intense," she said, gripping my hand tighter. "You don't have a dead body in your motel room, do you? It isn't anything like that."

"No," I laughed, "it isn't ANYTHING like that."

I bought a bottle of wine after work and went back to my motel room to get ready. I showered, shaved and prepared my legs as best I could. I'd used the self-tanning lotion, which worked surprisingly well, the previous night and now my legs had a deep tanned color to them. I put on a clean shirt, panties, a pair of jeans, and socks after painting my toenails a bright pink color. I didn't want to shock Erica as soon as she arrived, but I wanted to be ready to change once I felt comfortable putting on a miniskirt and heels in front of her.

When Erica arrived she was very casually dressed in a t-shirt and jeans. She saw the bottle of wine and immediately opened it and poured us each a glass, using the plastic wine glasses I'd gotten at the liquor store.

Then she turned to me and said, "Okay, so what's the big secret?"

I sat down next to her on the edge of the bed with my glass of wine and looked into her beautiful, blue eyes. "I don't remember the things we talked about before I checked out for all those months. I don't know how much you know about me. That puts me at a disadvantage."

"You want to know what I know about you?"

"We must have shared our thoughts and our feelings, since we've known each other for a long time. Are there things you know about me that aren't, you know, fairly normal?"

"Well, I know you tend to be a sap, that you fall for really messed up women who take you for a ride and then you feel too guilty to get out of the relationship when it goes horribly wrong. I know you care a lot about people in general. I know that you once told me that I was the first woman you ever really loved and that the other women you've been with you were with because they were available and things just fell into place. I'm not sure if that is true or if it is just you trying to sweet talk me, but I'm pretty sure you meant it when you said it."

"That's the weirdest stuff you know about me?"

"As weird as you telling me two years ago you were in love with me, then staying with Lisa for those two years while I actually kept meeting you every Friday for lunch and looked forward to the love letters you used to write me. How weird am I to have tried to pretend I was going on with my life while always holding onto the hope that you would finally leave her. I think I'm weirder than you, Kasey."

"What if I showed you something about myself that I've kept a secret for probably longer than I've been in love with you?"

"I won't walk out, if that's what you're asking. Well, I won't walk out as long as it doesn't involve you telling me you're going back to Lisa or that you've got a dead body stashed somewhere." She paused, took a drink of the wine, and added with a laugh, "Although, the second part could be negotiable. The first part will get you this wine thrown in your face."

I grabbed the bag I'd thrown my miniskirt and high heels into and told Erica I'd be right back. Then I quickly drained my wine glass and went into the bathroom. I changed quickly, but then stood in front of the mirror for close to ten minutes before summoning the courage to walk out in front of Erica dressed the way I now was.

Finally, I took a deep breath and walked out of the bathroom.

Erica looked surprised, but not shocked. I expected her to gasp, or laugh, or completely freak out. Instead, she sat on the edge of the bed and looked me up and down before putting down her wine glass and saying, "Damn, you have better legs than I do."

"This is my secret," I said nervously. "I like to crossdress and I wanted you to know before, you know, we took this thing between us any further."

"Well," she said with barely a pause, "it doesn't freak me out or even bother me at all, really. I just have to say, though, that you look damn good in a skirt and heels."

She patted the bed next to her, urging me to sit down. I struggled a bit to walk over to her in my heels, which I wasn't used to walking in, despite all the experience I'd had during my coma. I sat down, still feeling very nervous and awkward, and she put her hand on my thigh.

"So, just so I know, is it just crossdressing or is it something more? You can be honest with me."

"I've never been with a man in any way, if that's what you mean."

"Do you ever think about it?"

"As far as I can remember, I've only been with women."

"That wasn't the question, baby, the question was whether you think about it? Do you fantasize about sex with men when you get dressed up like that?"

"Not really..."

"Do you remember when we went to that club a year or so ago? We went with Marci and Lisa. The club that had this drag night with all these drag queens dancing up on stage?"

"No."

"So, you don't remember how I said you should get up there and show them all up? You used to shave your legs, I knew that much, but I didn't know you crossdressed. I told you that with your legs you could have brought the house down, but you don't remember that."

"No, I don't remember that at all."





Kasey's Confession Ch. 14



"Well, you told me you would never dress like that or get up on stage and you seemed pretty upset by the whole idea. You're usually pretty easy going, but you overreacted and got really defensive. The point is that I really should have figured it out at that point. You're really insecure about this part of you, and you shouldn't be. Like I said, you have great legs."

"Well, thanks for saying so, but I really don't think I'd be able to get on a stage like that."

"So, let's be completely honest here, do you ever think about being with a man sexually?" she asked again, but this time pulled out my dildo from underneath the folds of the blanket on the bed.

I'd left it on my nightstand without thinking about it, and Erica had obviously seen it and taken it to look at. Once I realized what had happened, I looked down at the floor and shook my head.

"Sometimes I think about it, but it is just fantasies. I don't intend to act on them."

"Why not? I think it could be fun."

"I really don't think I ever would," I said, not at all sure if I was being honest or not.

"Okay, well, thanks for the wine and thanks for trusting me with your little secret, although I honestly think you are making a bigger deal of it than you need to," she said before tossing the dildo back onto the bed and standing up. "I don't mean to be rude or anything, but I need to go."

"You're leaving?"

She smiled. "Well, baby, I told you that Chris and I are back together, and I really haven't figured out where that is going or where we are going. Right now, though, I am with Chris and like you, I'm not one for cheating on my significant other. This is going to take some time to figure out."

"I do love you, Erica."

"I know, baby, and I love you, too. Try to be patient the way I was patient with you the past couple of years while you stayed with Lisa."

"Okay," I said with a faint smile.

"You know, though," Erica said as she walked towards the door. "It wouldn't bother me or make me love you any less if you did go out and maybe experiment with those fantasies of yours. After all, you are single right now."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 15



Dr. Duckworth, who looked just like the crazy shrink Gary I'd met while apparently imagining myself as a prostitute, had apparently been consulting with Dr. Bennett and others during my coma. He was very interested in the psychological effects that being in a comatose state for an extended period of time had on a person. When he informed me that he was willing to see me free of charge, as long as I agreed to allow myself to be part of his research on the subject, I began keeping regular appointments with him.

After ascertaining that my memory of my life before the coma was spotty at best, but that I was slowly regaining memories, he assured me that the best thing for memory recovery was time, as well as getting plenty of rest. He also recommended several brain exercises that were like games, which were generally based on remembering the names of things, what they were for, and using my recall of those things to be able to successfully complete the games.

Then he asked me, "What do you remember from the time you were in the coma, if anything?"

"Well," I said, trying to be honest without revealing too much about the life I'd led while away from the life I was now living, "I was in some kind of weird, parallel world where people I knew here acted very different and did things differently than they did here."

"Was it like an extended dream?"

"It felt very real," I confessed. "I felt like I was really there, living this other life and I had no reason to believe it wasn't real. You were there."

"I was there? That's intriguing, as we did not know each other before your coma. I consulted on your case and visited you several times as we monitored your brain activity. There was concern that if you came out of the coma you would be in a vegetative state, and your living will stated you did not want to be kept alive in such a case."

"Oh, I'm quite certain I wouldn't want to be kept alive as a vegetable," I told him. "The thing is, I definitely was fully functional in this 'other world' and I was able to walk and talk and... um, interact with other people there."

Dr. Duckworth recommended a therapist I could talk to about what he called my "re-entry issues" and told me he'd meet me for a follow-up appointment in three months. I left his office feeling more at peace with what I'd gone through, being able to think of it as a very vivid and powerful dream, but more frightened than ever about talking about the specifics of what had happened in that "dream."

I walked out into Dr. Duckworth's waiting room where a young man wearing jeans and a t-shirt with a cartoon duck on it looked up at me and said, "What if it wasn't a dream?"

He looked exactly like Derek, the mall pretzel vendor who had led me to meet Mr. Smith. I said nothing to him and rushed past him to the door to the office, got into my car and drove off quickly.

I'd gotten myself a one bedroom apartment that suited my needs, but I had been putting off getting my things from Lisa's place. Seeing her again filled me with feelings of dread, and I feared another round of her baby talk as much as I did another round of her pleading with me to stay with her. She'd sent me letters at work, rambling on about how much she loved me and how good we'd been together and could be again if I was willing to "work at it." I tended to laugh at the letters at first, then sigh and feel sorry for her, and then I'd throw them away.

I called ahead and told her I would be there on Wednesday night to pick up the rest of my things. I brought my friend Jeff from work, who had a pickup truck, and we drove up to her house.

There was another car in the driveway aside from Lisa's, so I knocked on the door and waited. No one answered and the door was unlocked and slightly ajar, so I pushed it open and called out to her.

Jeff sat in the truck as I walked into the house, calling out to Lisa and loudly saying, "Anyone home?"

There was no response, but I could hear sounds coming from behind the closed bedroom door. Lisa was moaning and I could hear the sound of a man grunting. I saw my things, boxed up in a corner of the living room with my name written on the boxes with a Sharpie. 

"Come on!" I heard a man yelling in the bedroom. "Take us both, you fat fucking cow!"

I thought about whether or not I should invite Jeff in to help me with the boxes. Lisa had known I was coming and when I was coming. She also knew I was bringing along someone to help me. If she decided she wanted to put on a show by having a threesome with two guys in the bedroom while we were there, that was on her. 

There were empty beer bottles all over the living room and an almost completely empty bottle of vodka on the coffee table along with three glasses. When I went to get Jeff, I told him with a disgusted sigh that Lisa was having some kind of sex party but that she'd taken it behind closed doors in the bedroom. He laughed and said, "I'm not surprised," and followed me into the house.

We were almost done getting all of my things out of the house. The last to go was my television, and we were about to lift it and carry it to the truck together when the bedroom door opened. It banged hard against the wall and Lisa ran down the short hallway to the living room completely naked, sweating profusely, and crying.

"Why aren't you saving me, hunny bunny?" she sobbed. "These terrible bad men came and made me do nasty things with them! Help me!"

Looking at her I just felt disgusted. In that light I only saw her as Nancy, and I knew she'd invited these men over and gotten into bed with them just so she could try to get me to come in and "rescue" her. Shaking my head, I looked at Jeff and said, "Let's get the TV in the truck and get out of here."

Lisa stood there, crying and sucking her thumb. We moved past her without looking at her, but as I looked down the hallway towards the bedroom door I saw a very tall man standing there with a sheet wrapped around his waist looking annoyed. It was Mr. Smith, and just behind him standing in the bedroom doorway was Glenn, who had been Nancy's husband in my "other life."

"Is that everything?" Jeff asked once we had the television in the truck.

"I think so," I replied. "If we left anything behind, fuck it, she can have it."

Just as we were getting into the truck to leave, the man who looked just like Mr. Smith came out of the house wearing just a pair of sweatpants. He had something in his left hand, which he held up for me to see and then walked over to the truck. We were backed into the driveway to more easily load the truck, so he walked straight up to me and handed me a stack of three DVDs and a VHS tape.

"Lisa said these were yours," he said with a grin, "wouldn't want you to forget them, eh?"

I looked down at them as I took them from his hand. All three DVDs were commercially bought porno movies with titles like "Too Hot Shemales" and "Ladyboy Paradise." The VHS tape was the kind that was bought blank to record movies or television shows on. Written in my handwriting on the label was "Keith/Kasey."

Mr. Smith walked away chuckling and went back into the house. I clutched the DVDs and the tape against my chest and hid them from Jeff's view.

"What was that all about?" Jeff asked as he started the truck.

"Nothing important," I said and walked around back so I could stick the movies into one of the boxes in the back that wasn't completely full. "Let's get out of here."

After we'd been driving down the road for a few minutes in silence, just listening to the radio, Jeff turned the music down and said, "It was just weird the way that big lummox was looking all happy and shit when he gave you those tapes or whatever."

"I think it is probably tapes of Lisa and me having sex or something like that. I'm going to see what they are and then burn them."

"You should probably just burn them without looking at them," said Jeff, sounding suddenly nervous.

"Why? Watching myself having sex with Lisa isn't going to make we want to get back with her. I just want to make sure that's what it is. It could be something else, you know, like someone's wedding or whatever."

"Don't watch them," Jeff said. "Just burn them."

"What do you care, Jeff? It isn't like you're on them or anything."

Jeff pulled over to the side of the road and put the truck into "Park." He sat quietly for a moment, staring out through the windshield, looking like he was trying very hard to put a thought into words. I waited quietly, worried about what it was he was so concerned about but afraid to ask because I knew the tapes probably had me dressed up as a woman on them.

"Just don't watch them," he said finally, sounding frustrated and upset. "Just destroy them, okay?"

"Okay," I said quietly. "I'll just destroy them."

When we got to my new apartment and started unloading the boxes, Jeff asked me several times where I had stashed "the tape." I said I wasn't sure, even though I was, because even if I didn't know what was on the tape marked "Keith/Kasey" I didn't want him to see the "shemale" DVDs.

"I'll destroy the tape when I find it," I told him. "Don't worry about it, whatever it is, I'll take care of it."

"Okay, well, I've got to get going," he said, sounding tired and annoyed. "My wife is going to kill me for taking so long."

Once he left and I had set up my television along with my DVD player and VHS tape player, I stuck the tape that seemed to cause so much controversy into the tape player and sat down on the floor in front of it wearing just my short shorts and a t-shirt.

The tape opened with a party. Everyone was in some kind of costume, so I assumed it was a Halloween party. I recognized Jeff in some kind of pirate get-up with a sword and eye patch. Lisa was dressed in a princess gown with a tiara and magic wand with a star at the top of it. I also saw a number of my co-workers from my present job.

Then I saw myself. I was wearing a cheerleader outfit with thigh-high leather boots and a rubber demon mask that covered my entire head. I only realized it was myself because I recognized the outfit and the mask as being things I'd owned, and the mask was amongst the things I'd packed. 

The party was at some kind of rented hall, and I assumed it was a work-related party. Then the tape stopped, went to snow for several seconds, and then resumed. When it started again the party had moved to the living room of the house I'd shared with Lisa. There were fewer people at the party and some had abandoned parts of their costumes. Jeff had taken off his eye patch, Lisa was no longer wearing her tiara, and I had taken off the demon mask and the thigh high boots.

I counted five of my male co-workers aside from Jeff, three of my female co-workers, Lisa and myself. The only person I couldn't account for was the person who was holding the video camera. People were talking to the camera, and kept saying the name "Chris" as they did, as in "Join the party, Chris" and "What are you doing, making a documentary, Chris? Drink up!"

It seemed like just a normal home movie of a drunken Halloween party, but the more I watched myself walking around drunk wearing just a cheerleader outfit with a much shorter than normal skirt, the more nervous I got.

For almost twenty minutes, the camera was focused on the three female co-workers who were in the kitchen telling rambling stories about their supposed first time sexual experiences while "Chris" asked them provocative questions from behind the camera.

Then one of my male co-workers came rushing into the frame, yelling to Chris, "Dude, you have to see this! Bring the camera!"

The camera picture jumped around wildly as Chris carried it while rushing out to the living room. Then I heard Chris said, "Oh fuck" before the camera turned and focused on what was going on in the middle of the living room.

Still wearing my cheerleader outfit, I was on my knees in the middle of the living room. The coffee table had been pulled away and standing in front of me was a man I recognized from work.

His pants were down around his ankles and I was very eagerly sucking on his cock.

Another male co-worker got up off the couch and walked over to where I was kneeling and pulled his cock out through the fly in his pants. The three women were now walking into the room and laughing and joining in with the rest of the group who were all saying things like "Come on Kasey, you can do it!"

"Come on, give me some of that," said the man who had just pulled out his cock. "Suck on mine for a while, cheer girl."

I started going back and forth on the two men's cocks. After a couple of minutes, and with the camera setting up for a better angle that clearly showed my face, Jeff got up and pulled his cock out. It was completely hard and he joined the other two men in forming a circle around me. The camera showed me smiling and giggling as I went back and forth between the cocks, sucking them each in turn.

I pressed the stop button on the VCR and sat on floor staring at the blank screen.

After taking a half hour to process what I'd seen, I picked up the phone and called Jeff.

"You watched the tape, didn't you?" he asked.

"I had to know what it was. I had no idea..."

"Well, everyone was drunk and high and fucked up at that party after we got back to your place. Lisa was trying to make out with everyone and you kept telling everyone you were a cheerleader from State named Kasey and you were 'boy crazy' or whatever. Shit got out of hand and everyone agreed to act like nothing ever happened, like it was just one of those crazy ass things no one would believe anyway."

"So, why did I have a tape?"

"You didn't, Lisa did. Chris was filming and afterwards she begged him for a copy. He claimed he destroyed the tape, but he didn't and made her a copy. They were both blackmailing you because of whatever you have going on with Chris' girlfriend Erica."

"The cameraman was... THAT Chris?" I gasped.

"You didn't watch the whole thing, did you?"

"No, I turned it off after the guys started, um, circling around me..."

Jeff sighed, "Just get rid of it. Destroy it. Unless she made another copy, Lisa gave you her copy. Chris still has a copy. I mean, it's been more than a year and after your accident and the coma and everything, most people figured the whole thing would die out. I figure Chris wouldn't want it to get out either, unless, of course, you're screwing around with his girlfriend again."

"Uh, I mean, just wow. I don't remember any of this shit and I can't believe this ever happened."

"Dude, no one wants to remember that night, it was just fucking crazy and shit. If it wasn't for the tape, no one would ever bring it up again. Burn that shit and forget about it."

"I'm going to do that right now," I lied. "Thanks for being cool about this."

"No problem dude, have a good night."

After I hung up the phone, I took a deep breath and pressed play again. I sat down on a chair in front of the television and pulled down my shorts and tossed them onto my pile of dirty laundry. I got a bottle of baby oil and lubricated my dick and began stroking myself as I watched myself on my knees as first one, then two, then three, then four, and then five guys all joined in and formed a circle around me while I excitedly sucked on each of their cocks in turn.

After a while they started climaxing and in turn each of my friends shot a big load of cum onto my face, where I begged them to shoot it when they pulled out of my mouth and started jerking off to get themselves off. Once the last of the five guys had shot his load onto my face, Chris' camera went in for a close-up of my cum covered, smiling face.

"That was so good," I squealed into the camera.

At the same time as the camera closed in on my face and I saw all the semen dripping off it and the big smile I had, I felt myself getting very close to orgasm. I was jerking myself fast now and when I said "That was so good" into the camera, I reached a staggering, body shaking orgasm. I moaned and cried out "Oh yes!" as I shot my cum straight at the television screen and my own face.

I was about to turn the tape off and save anything else that might be on it for later, but in the afterglow of my orgasm I was moving slowly.

I looked back at the screen and saw the camera getting jittery and out of focus. Chris was handing it off to one of the other guys and giving him instructions on how to properly use it. Then the camera turned back on me. I was still kneeling on the floor as the camera found me, and aside from wiping some of the cum away from my eyes, I had done nothing to clean myself up.

"My turn," said Chris as he walked towards me and dropped his pants.

I quickly stopped the tape and recoiled in horror. Watching myself sucking five men who stood in a circle around me had been a huge turn on. Other than Jeff, the others were guys I knew from work that I seemed to be friendly with but not at all close to. Chris was a different story. He was Erica's boyfriend. He was the one thing standing between me being with Erica, and that wasn't a delusion. She'd been waiting for me to break up with Lisa for years and now that I did she was with Chris and couldn't just break up with him because I was available.

She was, or at least seemed, very understanding and open minded about my crossdressing and about the idea of my being with men. 

I doubted her seeing me giving her boyfriend head was something she would be open minded about. And my being very willingly in a submissive position with her boyfriend submissively was something else I couldn't imagine possibly working in my favor.

Still, I figured he wouldn't ever show her the tape. She would have asked why he didn't stop what was happening instead of just filming it and encouraging it, even if he managed to edit out the footage where I went down on him.

With what I felt after meeting her again after my months of being in a coma, and what I could remember and piece together, Erica was the real deal. I knew I'd never loved any woman the way I loved her, and after she had been so understanding and open-minded about my crossdressing and sexual fantasies, I knew it was more than just some passionate affair.

We'd never slept together, or even kissed on the mouth, but when I saw her, my heart started beating faster and I felt the urge to impress her and make her laugh. I had thought it was a joke when people said I'd been driving down the road and saw her on a bicycle wearing tight pink shorts when I lost control of my car and got into the accident that left me in the hospital for months.

I wondered how much that had to do with my "other life" experience where I was constantly wanting to show off my legs to men in short shorts, long before I started giving men head.

The story of the video and Chris' part in it gave me a new perspective on his relationship with Erica, and on what she'd told me about him wanting to get married. This was a cruel and manipulative man and she was too good for that. If he'd use a tape like the one I'd just seen to blackmail me into staying away from her, then what was he capable of doing if she ever tried to leave him?

On Friday I met Erica at the usual table at the mall food court. She was already there when I arrived, and I sat down with a cup of coffee I'd just bought and handed her another.

"You want anything to eat?" I asked.

"No," she said with a forced smile. After a long pause she said, "Chris formally proposed last night."

She paused and we sat in silence for a couple of minutes.

"So, um, did you accept?"

"I told him I needed to think about it. We've talked about it a lot the past couple of months, but I really don't know. We've split up a couple times over things I'd rather not get into, and I just don't know if this is him trying to prove he can make a commitment or try to hold onto me or if he really wants to marry me."




Kasey's Confession Ch. 15



"Do you want to marry him?"

"Dammit, Keith, I don't know. You know how I said I didn't want to be the reason why you and Lisa broke up? Well, I wanted you to break up because you weren't happy and you didn't really love her the way two people in a relationship love each other. You pitied her and she made you feel guilty and..."

"I thought we were talking about whether or not you wanted to marry Chris?"

"Shit, Keith, I don't know," she said and ran her fingers anxiously through her hair and looked down at the table before looking up again and sighing. "What I'm trying to say is I don't want you to be the reason why I don't marry Chris. I want the reason to be that I don't want to marry him because I don't want to marry HIM."

"Do you love him?" I asked quietly.

"Dammit, Keith, I'm in love with YOU. How can I marry him when I'm in love with you? I can't marry him. I can't. If I do all I'll ever do is wonder what would have happened with us. I wish you'd never told me how you felt about me. No, that's not fair. I'm glad you told me, it just complicated things. And then Chris and I split up and I was coming to see you on my bike and you went and crashed your car into the wall and well, you know the rest."

I wanted to just stop her and tell her to leave Chris and run away with me, but something held me back. It was the combination of my knowledge of the existence of the video and the fact that I had been watching it and masturbating to it for two days.

"Whatever you decide, Erica, I'll always love you."

"I know, you are too good of a person to tell me to leave him."

She stood up, sighed, and put her sunglasses on before kissing me on the cheek and telling me she had to go. I watched her walk away, feeling confused about the way I felt about her and the fact that I was fantasizing almost constantly about sucking cock. 

I was about to get up myself when someone dashed in from out of my line of sight and landed haphazardly on the seat Erica had just vacated.

"How you doin', Kasey?" he said with a devilish grin. It was the guy who looked just like Derek and he was wearing the same t-shirt with the cartoon duck on the front of it he'd been wearing when I saw him at the psychiatrist's office.

"What do you want?" I asked, sounding purposely annoyed.

"I got you what you need. I got your fix."

"What fix?"

"There is this dude I know who heard about your adventures as Kasey, you know, in that other place, and he really wants to meet you. How about you meet him tonight at your place? I can vouch for him."

"YOU can vouch for him?" I groaned. "Who the fuck are YOU?"

"I'm Derek, man. Remember me? I used to work at the pretzel stand, but I quit that shitty job. I've got myself a new job. I'm kind of a matchmaker, you know?"

"I'm not interested," I said, getting up and throwing my empty coffee cup in the trash.

"His name is Bob."

I remembered the name Bob right away. I'd met a Bob in whatever the place was I'd been in during my coma. He'd been the easy going friendly guy who'd been quite decent to Kasey, willing to hang out and not just want to get Kasey on his knees and shove his cock down Kasey's throat.

"Do I know this 'Bob'?"

"He knows you," said Derek. "He says he knows you from a dream..."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 16



I agreed to meet Bob, but only in a public place, and only because I wanted to find out if he was the same Bob I'd met in my other life as Kasey. If he was, then he would be the perfect guy to help me fulfill my fantasy to suck cock. I wanted to avoid any craziness like I experienced while I was Kasey during my coma, and Bob was the most reasonable man I'd met and gone down on there.

I wore a shirt and pants to the meeting, which happened at an outdoor café. I sat enjoying a cold beer and eating a chef's salad when he arrived.

"Keith? Hi, I'm Bob," he said as he approached the table.

"How did you know it was me?" I asked and told him to sit down.

"I recognize you from, well, it is hard to explain. I've been having these strange, recurring dreams where I go over to your place, except you call yourself 'Kasey' and you are usually dressed up in heels and a skirt and, well, like a very sexy woman. Does that sound weird or creepy? I hope not."

"How did you know I was here? Not at the restaurant, but like in the real world?"

Bob sat down nervously in the seat across from me. "I ran into Derek, this kid I used to buy a pretzel from at the mall every Saturday when I brought my wife shopping. I have no idea how he knew, but he told me one day that 'Kasey is here, do you want to meet him?' He just came up to me when I was at the hardware store and told me that. Then he calls me at home one day. I have no idea how he knew my phone number, maybe off a receipt or something at the pretzel place, but he told me you went by the name 'Keith' and you'd meet me here today."

"This is really fucked up," I said.

"I know, I'm sorry, it's just that my dreams were so real like, and when he knew about them and knew you were here I had to see if it was true. And it is."

"Well, that is fucked up on its own, but I'm talking about the fact that I recognize you as well. Sort of from a dream, hard to explain, but where I remember you from your name was Bob."

"Well, this is already really bizarre, but I hope you don't mind if I ask you a personal question."

"No, go ahead."

"Do you ever wear short skirts and heels and, you know, dress as a woman and call yourself 'Kasey' sometimes."

"Actually, I do."

"I hope this isn't too forward, or creepy, of me to ask, but do you think you might be willing to dress up like that for me sometime?"

"How about tomorrow afternoon?" I asked him.

"Sundays are usually not very good days, as I usually have to do things with my wife, but she's going to be out of town with her sister for the weekend, so I'm free. Oh, um, I know we're just going to be, um, hanging out and so forth, but me being married isn't like a thing or anything for you, is it?"

I laughed, "No, that's totally cool. I don't know what will happen but what I don't want is someone getting, you know, too attached to me. I'm not looking for a boyfriend or anything like that. I just want a friend who I can hang out with while dressed and who really likes the way I look like that, you know?"

"Oh definitely, I understand, definitely, I'm definitely not looking for anything more than that."

After getting home, I began to feel more troubled by the existence of the tape that showed me sucking my co-workers cocks at a party. At work no one seemed to act in any way that would betray them knowing about it, or even remembering being one of those I went down on. It was, as Jeff had told me, something everyone involved wanted to forget about.

At least that was the case with the people I had worked with who had been there or participated in it. Sometimes one of the women I worked with who had been at the party would give me a smile or a wink and I'd wonder why. In all likelihood I was being paranoid, but what was continuing to gnaw at me was how Lisa and Chris had copied the tape and used it to blackmail me. Lisa had probably threatened to show it to people if I didn't stay with her. It was the most likely reason she held onto a copy, but with Chris I wondered how he intended to use it to keep me away from Erica. Did the threat of him showing it to her keep me away from Erica, or was it something more than that?

I called Lisa, which was something I went back and forth on and decided finally to just do. I wanted to know more about the tape, whether there were other copies aside from the one she'd given me and the one Chris apparently had. I just wanted to ask her about it on the phone, but she insisted we meet while talking very quietly to me as if she were trying to avoid having someone overhear her.

"Look, I'll meet you, but I don't want you to think this is some way for us to get back together again," I told her. "That isn't going to happen."

"I'm not trying to get you to take me back," she whispered. "I gave you my copy of the tape to show you I was letting you go."

After she hung up I felt good about how she had talked to me in a normal, adult voice, even though it was a barely audible whisper. At the same time I wondered if she was still playing some sort of game to "win me back" by acting mature and responsible. Why she insisted on whispering was another question, which I put off to the probability that there was a man at the house with her and that she didn't want him to hear her talking to her ex-boyfriend.

She insisted on meeting at a bookstore. The name sounded familiar, and when I got there I remembered it being a bookstore I had frequented in the past. When she arrived, she pulled me into the stacks of used books in the back of the store and whispered in much the same fashion as she had on the phone.

"That was my only copy of the tape," she whispered emphatically. "I know that's what you are worried about, but there is more to it than just that."

"Like what?" I asked in my normal speaking voice.

"Shh," she insisted, "keep your voice down."

"Why?"

"Just keep your voice down. There are other copies of the tape out there."

"I know that Chris kept a copy, probably the original, since he filmed it," I said quietly.

"Yes, but there are other copies," she whispered. "Did you watch the whole thing?"

"Yeah, I think I did," I said quietly. "I had to know what was on the tape, so I watched it, and then after the part where I, you know, did the thing with Chris the tape cut out and went to snow."

"There's more AFTER that," Lisa whispered, her voice getting much louder for a moment as she said 'after.'

"More? What else is on that tape?" I asked, suddenly feeling panicked.

"Just watch it and you'll see," she whispered. "I don't know who has the other copies, but I know Chris made some. I think he even sent it to some amateur porn site on the internet, but I'm not sure."

"Oh fuck, seriously? Who has the other copies?" I asked loudly.

"I don't know, but I can try to find out. I'm sorry, hunny bunny, I really am. I'm sorry about everything. I really do hope you find happiness with Erica or whoever you end up with. It was wrong of me to try to force you to stay with me. I see that now. I really do."

"It's okay," I told her. "I appreciate all the help you can give me in finding and destroying all the copies of the tapes. It would mean a lot to me."

"I'll do what I can," she said and started walking out of the store. 

I followed behind her, looking around at the mostly empty bookstore and wondering why she'd wanted to meet there. We stepped out onto the sidewalk and she took my hand in hers and gently patted it with her other hand.

"Can you forgive me?" she asked, looking at me with sad eyes.

"I'm sure I will, eventually," I said.

She smiled ever so slightly and told me she was parked on the other side of the street. My car was right in front of the bookstore, so I said goodbye and got into my car while she crossed the street.

That was when a truck, traveling at a very fast rate of speed, appeared out of nowhere and hit her. She was pulled under the truck after it hit her head-on, giving her only enough time to throw up her arms in an ineffective defense.

That was how Lisa died. At that moment I stopped thinking of her as Nancy acting as someone else. She became a fragile and badly damaged person. She struggled to deal with who she was and with finding someone who would truly love her as she was. She had convinced herself that I was that person, but somehow let go of that conviction after I moved out.

The truck kept going, off into the night, and I never saw the driver, the plates, or even the color of the truck. All I remember was seeing was the words "Mr. Smith's Smoked Sausages" written on the side of the truck.

I rushed out into the street to see how badly she was hurt, not knowing she was already dead. The woman working in the bookstore came out and told me she had called 911 and explained what happened. I turned to her with tears in my eyes and said, "She's gone. She's already gone."

Later that night, after I'd gotten home, my phone rang. There were messages already on my answering machine, but I hadn't listened to them. My old friend Marci was calling. I knew we had been friends for almost twenty years and remembered us having dated in high school but it not working out. She had heard about Lisa and the accident and was calling to see if I was okay.

"I'm okay," I said with great sadness in my voice.

"Don't blame yourself, it won't do any good," she told me.

"I'm not blaming myself," I said. "I didn't push her in front of the truck or anything."

"I know, it's just that sometimes we blame ourselves for shit that we have no control over."

"I'm just really sad and really upset that she's dead," I told her after a deep sigh.

"I guess you don't remember," she said, "but that's probably a good thing."

"Remember what?" I asked angrily.

"It isn't important, don't worry about it."

"No, you brought it up, something about me not remembering. There is a lot of crap I don't remember and saying it isn't important is bullshit. What don't I remember?"

She paused for a long time and I continued to demand she tell me what I supposedly didn't remember. Finally she said, "You used to tell everyone you wished she would get hit by a truck."

I hung up the phone without saying another word. Then I threw the phone against the wall and fell face first across my bed. After about twenty minutes I got up and walked into the kitchen where I grabbed a bottle of rum and a glass. I sat and drank by myself for several hours until I saw it was four o'clock in the morning.

I picked up the phone and hung it back up. The receiver had come off the base of the phone when I threw it, so anyone who had called during my drinking binge had gotten a busy signal. Then I poured myself another drink, picked up the phone, and dialed Erica's home number. I didn't care if it was four in the morning. I didn't care what Chris thought, or if he was even there.

"Hello?" It was Erica's voice and she sounded wide awake.

"It's me," I said quietly.

"I heard what happened," she said. "I tried to call you but all I got was a busy signal, so I figured you took the phone of the hook. I almost drove over to see you but then I realized I don't know where you live any more. The last time I was at your place you were living at the motel."

"I kind of threw the phone at the wall after talking to Marci."

"Yeah, I figured as much. She told me about your conversation. It was stupid of her to tell you what she told you."

"Did I really used to say I wished that Lisa would get hit by a truck?"

"Baby, you used to say a lot of things, and you didn't mean most of them. You were usually frustrated and upset with her, and sometimes really angry about being with her, but you definitely never meant her any harm. I mean, you went back to her once because she tried to kill herself, so try to put it in perspective."

"I'm really drunk right now," I told her.

"That doesn't surprise me," she said with a slight laugh. "Do you need company?"

I thought about it for several long seconds. "I don't think that would be a good idea."

"Hmm, well, my being there with you when you are drunk and emotional and upset, yeah, probably not a good idea under the circumstances. I do wish I could be there for you right now, though."

I didn't remember ending the call or hanging up the phone. When I woke up, the phone was back of my nightstand alongside a half-finished glass of rum. I was still in my clothes from the night before, on top of my blankets and sheets, and I had a killer headache.

It took me hours to get myself back to feeling human again. I ate a big breakfast, took two showers, and sat on my apartment's balcony drinking nothing but water while I stared out at the people in and around the swimming pool my apartment overlooked.

The phone rang sometimes after noon and I was going to ignore it, but since I was passing it on my way to make a pot of coffee, I decided to answer it.

"Hello, Keith? This is Bob. I was just calling to see if we were still getting together this afternoon."

I was going to tell him I had to cancel our little get-together on account of Lisa's accident and my general feeling of sorrow and anger, but then I changed my mind.

"Hi Bob, yeah, um, something really terrible happened last night and I was going to cancel on you, but honestly, I could use some company this afternoon. That is, you know, if you don't mind that I won't be in the happiest of moods."

"What happened? Are you sure you don't want to postpone it to another time, maybe? I'll completely understand."

"No, I need something to take my mind of things, otherwise I'll just be depressed all day. What time do you want to come over? I'll need some time to, you know, make myself all sexy for you."

Getting dressed up and becoming "Kasey" became a much needed distraction. There was nothing I could do for Lisa. Her family had left a message telling me they were taking care of everything and to please "stay out of the picture at least until the funeral." They didn't think much of me, as Lisa had apparently told them horror stories about how I had been treating her during our three year long relationship. 

I spent time tweezing my eyebrows, applied mascara and eye shadow I had bought, which turned out to be the easiest part of using makeup for me. It took me forever to get my lipstick on right. It would either smear, I would put it on too thick, or I would color way outside my lip line and make myself look like a clown. When I finally had it looking halfway decent, I decided to just stay with it and moved on.

I decided to be casual, and just wore a pink t-shirt along with a very short pair of white denim shorts. I remembered how, in my "other life," someone had told me to wear shorts that allowed a little bit of my ass cheeks to peak out from underneath when I walked. These shorts did just that.

I put on a pair of heels, but avoided getting too excessive. I wasn't used to wearing heels, so the pair I decided to go with were mules with a heel that was not quite three inches. 

Just as I felt I was finally ready, Bob knocked on my door. When I opened it, his jaw dropped and he was obviously quite pleased.

"You are much more gorgeous in real life than you were in my dreams," he said.

"Gosh, thank you," I said, blushing. "Come on in. Can I get you a beer or something to drink?"

"I'll take a beer," he said as he followed me into my apartment. "Did you want to talk about what's going on that has you so upset?"

"Definitely not," I said as I handed him a bottle of beer. "Why don't we talk about you?"

"Well, not much to tell you really," he said while we walked to the living room and sat down. "I'm a married guy in his mid-40s, never had kids, work as a sound engineer for an independent record label, and I really, really think you have the most gorgeous legs I have EVER seen."

I giggled in response.

He had sat down on my couch while I sat in a chair across from him. I had decided to get us each a beer, figuring a little "hair of the dog" couldn't hurt. I crossed my legs and tried to have a very ordinary conversation with Bob, but the way he kept staring at my legs and making comments about how beautiful they were made it hard to concentrate.

I kept finding reasons to go into the kitchen to give Bob an opportunity to look at my butt when I walked out of the room. Then, after we started talking about music and what he did as a sound engineer, I decided to put some music on my stereo, which gave him ample opportunity to look at me from behind, especially as I had to bend down to operate the stereo and select CDs to play.

"Why don't you sit over here," he suggested as I returned from putting on the music, motioning to the spot on the couch next to him.

I'd started to feel very comfortable with Bob, as if we were just a couple of friends talking about our lives, our musical interests and enjoying a few beers together on a Sunday afternoon. This comfort level, combined with my being dressed in short shorts and heels, which Bob definitely appreciated, made me forget all about Lisa's accident.

As I went to sit down next to Bob I couldn't help but notice that his cock was standing at attention. It was all too obvious in the material of his pants. I could make out the outline of the head of his cock through the material and the thickness of his very hard shaft was also very evident.

I looked away after finding myself staring for several very long seconds. I took the seat next to Bob, kicked off my shoes and folded my left leg under my right as I sat, a position that felt natural and reminded me of the way many women I'd known would sit in a casual situation.

Bob had a very neatly trimmed moustache and beard and glasses that were almost invisible, as in they didn't stand out unless you were looking for them. He was very modestly built, around 5'10" with a man's physique with some slight definition in his arms that showed he kept in shape but didn't exactly work out.

As we talked I kept looking at his body, as well as the bulge in his pants, and wondered if I really wanted to be with a man sexually.

My "other life" felt like a fantasy that raged out of control, and while the videotape showed that under the right conditions I could get downright slutty, this was an entirely different situation. This would be completely by choice, as Bob wasn't pushing me into anything, but he was making it quite clear that he found me very attractive and would be up for whatever I wanted.

Before long, Bob's fingertips were gently running up and down my legs. Then I had both of my legs stretched across his lap and his hands were both moving along the full length of my calves and down to my feet, which he began lightly massaging.

"That feels so good," I purred out after giving up on my efforts to act casual and as if what he was doing wasn't having an effect on me.

"Good," Bob said with a smile. "I'm glad you enjoy it."

The way my legs were stretched across his lap caused my calves to occasionally rub up against his erection through his pants. Every time it happened, I would bite my lip to keep from making any sound that would indicate how much that excited me. It seemed to be happening with greater frequency, especially after Bob started massaging my feet, and eventually I couldn't hold back.

"Aaaaahhh... you are so... hard..."

"I had a feeling you'd like that," Bob said with a smile. "I've been hard since you opened the door. These legs of yours, they're too good to be true."

I swung my legs off his lap and returned to a sitting position next to Bob with my left leg again folded underneath me.

"In your dreams, what would I be doing at this point?" I asked with a smile on my face.

"You really want to know?" Bob laughed and put his hand on my knee. "The Kasey from my dreams would have been on his knees giving me head a long time before now."




Kasey's Confession Ch. 16



"Is that what you want?" I asked. "I did that a lot in my dreams, or wherever I went after being in an accident, and I know I've done it at least once before at a party when I was drunk, but I don't remember it at all."

"I'm sitting here so hard I think my dick is going to explode, Kasey," Bob said. "You ask me if I want you to give me a blowjob? I'd be lying if I said I didn't."

"I'd be lying if I said I wasn't thinking about it from the moment you walked in the door, and even before that. The problem is," I said as I looked down at his bulge and started tracing around the edges of it with my long painted fingernails, "I know that once I start sucking cock, I'm going to be wanting it all the time."

"I don't think you're going to have... any trouble... finding men who..."

Bob's words were broken up by him starting to breath heavily as I unzipped his fly and reached into his pants. I found the opening in his boxers and found the head of his very hard cock already peeking out through it. He went silent, his head tilting back, and his breathing getting heavier as I slid his pants and boxers down the length of his cock and brought it out into the air.

Bob's cock in the real world was different than I remembered it from our previous encounter. It was very thick, and as I wrapped my hand around it I let out a soft moan because it was so warm and so big around. It was a perfect length, probably around seven inches, and it had a gorgeous, soft and full mushroom head.

I leaned down and slid my lips around the mushroom head and gave it a long, wet kiss. Then I started unbuckling his belt and opening his pants, which he was quick to help me with, and soon his pants and boxers were down around his ankles. He kicked off his shoes without untying them and I yanked his pants clear of his body.

"This is even better than my dreams," he said as he tried to catch his breath and I slid down onto my knees in front of him with his strong legs on either side of me and wrapped my hand around his cock again. It felt warm and soft, but it also felt like it was hard enough to break rocks with.

"Gosh, you have a beautiful cock," I said excitedly as I lowered my head and began kissing up and down along the shaft before sliding the head back into my mouth and sucking it slowly while keeping my lips tightly wrapped around it.

Bob's head fell backwards and he moaned. His left hand flailed out and he knocked several things of the end table next to the couch. I kept going, sucking up and down on the full length of Bob's cock while he moaned and flailed about with his arms and head.

I came up off of Bob's cock, just as I thought he was about to cum, looking to delay his orgasm by spending some quality time licking his balls.

Just as I came up, kissing the head of his cock before leaving it for a moment, Bobs hands came up around my head and pulled me down hard on his cock. The full length slipped very quickly into my mouth and banged up against the back of my throat.

He moaned loudly, yelling out "Yes! Yes! Oh fuck, YES!" as his body shook and he shot his load into my throat. I gagged badly, his hands let go of my head, and I came off his cock as quickly as I'd been pulled down on it with Bob's semen streaming out of the corners of my mouth.

I was coughing and lurching, spitting up his cum to clear my throat as I fell down towards the floor, holding myself up with my arms, which were shaking and buckling underneath me.

"Fuck that was good," Bob was muttering as he sprawled out against the back of the couch, still breathing heavily and trembling. "Damn."

Struggling to hold myself up on all fours, I looked down to see the cum I'd coughed up and was still dripping from my mouth. The room felt like it was spinning.

After a moment or two, Bob got up from the couch and helped me up. I fell onto the couch feeling completely spent and with a detached sense of disbelief as to what I had just done.

Bob got his pants and shoes back on and sat back down on the couch next to me. I was curled up, nearly in the fetal position. Bob started stroking my bare thigh.

"I don't want to be like this," I said, noticing that I was crying just as I spoke. "I don't want to be Kasey the cocksucker, but I feel like I need..."

"Sometimes what we think we want or don't want isn't what we need," Bob said. "I never thought about having a guy, even a guy with great legs, suck my cock until I had those dreams and met you. Now though, to be completely honest with you, I'd really like to see you on a regular basis."

"Really?" I said, looking up at him with my teary eyes.

"Yes, I really would, I love the way you look all dressed up with your makeup and heels and those legs, damn, those legs are unbelievable. And whether you want to admit it or not, you are a cocksucker."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 17



After Bob left, I sat on the couch staring into space for what felt like hours. Then I cleaned up the living room and kitchen before taking a shower and removing my makeup. I changed into a t-shirt and sweatpants, put on tube socks, and removed the VHS tape from the player. 

I threw it on the floor and was about to stomp on it when I changed my mind, picked it up and stuck it in one of my dresser drawers. Then I called Erica on her cell phone.

"What's up, Keith?" she asked. "Are you okay?"

"I don't know," I told her. "I'm freaking out a little."

"It wasn't your fault. Don't start thinking it was. Do you need me to come over?"

"Yeah, I kind of do," I said quietly.

"Give me your address."

When Erica arrived, she threw her arms around me as soon as I opened the door. She hugged me tightly, saying "I'm sorry" several times before letting me go.

"Come on inside," I told her after she released me. "Hate to make a scene in front of the neighbors," I added with a laugh.

Erica was wearing pink denim shorts, which immediately grabbed my attention and distracted me from what I wanted to say. My memory of her started falling more into place as my eyes lingered on her thighs and then drank in the full length of her legs. They were as close to perfect as any pair of legs could be. She was tall for a woman, probably close to 5'9" and her legs were incredibly long. Her thighs looked strong, were well defined but not muscular, and her calves looked equally athletic while still looking completely feminine. She tended to walk on her toes, which made the muscles in her legs tense up and release with every step she took. She left me breathless.

"Are those the shorts that caused my accident?" I asked, half-jokingly.

"The very same," she smiled. "I figured it would be safe to wear them if you weren't driving or operating any heavy equipment."

"I could still have a heart attack," I said as she walked into my kitchen, giving herself a tour of my new apartment.

"I like your new place," she said before walking out into the living room and opening the sliding glass door to my balcony. "A view of the pool, eh? It is like you have a little pervert perch up here. All those women in bikinis, and you up here enjoying the scenery..."

"Oh, come on, I'm not that bad," I told her with a laugh. "Besides, there's almost never anyone worth looking at down there. Now, if you lived here, that would be a different story."

"So, do you want to talk about it?" she asked after closing the sliding glass door.

"How did you know—"

I cut myself short, realizing that my encounter with Bob was at the front of my mind. I'd reacted to Erica asking if I wanted to talk about "it" as if she meant Bob, when she was talking about Lisa's death.

"How did I know she died?" Erica asked, looking confused. "Marci called me and told me."

For a moment I started wondering how Marci had found out so quickly about the accident. After I checked my messages the previous night, she had left me a message that was time stamped only an hour after it happened. Then I dismissed the thought as unimportant. When the police and ambulance showed up, Lisa's next of kin was notified and her family, and Marci was probably close to the family. I just couldn't quite remember how the connections lined up.

"Never mind," I sighed, "it isn't important. My head is really messed up right now. The accident on top of my memory still being confused, and then there is you and me and everything else..."

"You need time to sort everything out," Erica said, taking me by the hand and walking with me to the couch. As we sat down, she took my right hand between her hands and held onto it tightly. "You are a really great guy, Keith, and you've been through a lot. Have you been to see that shrink yet?"

"You think I'm crazy?"

"No, not at all," she said and gripped my hand tighter. "Seeing a therapist doesn't mean you're crazy, it just means you know you need help to sort things out. You were in a coma for months, you broke up with your girlfriend of three years who then got hit by a truck, you are struggling with your desire to explore your feminine side and deal with all those fantasies you're having, and then there is the whole thing with you and me. That's a lot to have on your plate at one time."

"How about we deal with one thing at a time," I said while avoiding eye contact with Erica. "How about we deal with you and me and where this is going with us?"

"Right now that probably isn't the best thing for you to focus on," she said and released my hand. She stood up and began pacing while biting at her thumbnail nervously.

"Why not? Isn't that something we need to deal with? From what I can remember, we've been in love with each other for two years and all we do is come up with excuses for why we can't be together?"

She let go of her thumbnail and let her arm drop to her side. "Being in a relationship with someone else is NOT an excuse for not being together," she snapped.

"That isn't what I mean."

"No, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. I know what you mean, and I know it seems that way, but it is like someone is trying to tell us we shouldn't be together. I broke up with Chris, you got back together with Lisa, and then you end up in a coma. I get back together with Chris and you come back to me and break up with Lisa. Can't you see how fucked up this whole thing is?"

"Are you saying we're just cursed and should give it up?"

"No, I'm saying you should deal with your issues that don't involve me while I figure out where my relationship with Chris is going, that way if things do come together for us we'll be—"

I grabbed Erica by the shoulders, pulled her in to me and kissed her, not on the cheek like we'd become so accustomed to doing, but on her lips. She didn't struggle or try to push me away, instead I felt her lips part as she returned my kiss with greater passion.

We kissed passionately for several minutes, our frenzied hands grabbing anxiously at each other's backs, arms and wherever else we could find and hold onto each other.

Then, quite abruptly, she pushed me away.

"We can't do this," she stammered, "we cannot DO THIS."

"I'm sick of us always having an excuse," I said while trying to catch my breath. "Fine, we are wonderful perfect people who never cheat on the people we're with even when we know we are with the wrong fucking person. Chris is an asshole and you belong with me."

"WHAT?"

"We belong together."

"No, not THAT, I'm talking about what you just said about my boyfriend."

"I'm sorry... no, wait a minute, I am NOT sorry. He IS an asshole and you should get rid of him."

Erica glared at me and then stormed off towards my front door. "That is the lowest thing you could EVER stoop to, Keith. You would actually talk shit about my boyfriend when he's never done anything to you? Just because I'm with him and not you doesn't make him an 'asshole.' Go see that therapist. You aren't the Keith I used to know, he would never have said what you just said."

She walked out and slammed the door behind her. I didn't try to chase after her.

I couldn't explain my statement without telling her about the tape Chris had made at the Halloween party and how he and Lisa had used it to blackmail me. I didn't regret my statement about him, but I didn't know how to explain the reason why I said it. I was too ashamed to let Erica see, or even know, what was on the tape, and I was ashamed of how I'd held on to it and masturbated daily while watching it.

Feeling frustrated and defeated, I sat back down on the couch with a huge sigh. Erica was right; I did need help to sort out the thoughts in my mind and everything that was going on in my life. I also knew I needed to do something to keep her from marrying Chris, not just because I wanted to be with her, but because I knew that the kind of man who would make that kind of video and lord it over me was not a good person. He was an asshole.

I sat for more than two hours, sorting through all the things weighing on my mind, and then got up. I turned on the television and flipped through dozens of channels and finding nothing I had any interest in watching. I then went out to a nearby clothing store to buy some new clothes. I'd intended to get clothes for work and other "regular guy" clothes, but I was distracted by a display in the women's section where there was a sale on shorts.

The shorts on sale were the kind I liked to wear, the same kind that Erica had worn during her visit, and I bought quite a few pairs. Then I saw they had shorts made of the same kind of material as my sweatpants, but in colors like pink, yellow and baby blue. I bought one of each of them as well.

Then I bought some ankle socks, the kind I remembered wearing when I was Kasey in the "other place," with lace trim around the ankles. I bought them in white and in pink.

When I got up to the counter, I avoided eye contact with the cashier, a young woman who appeared to have little or no interest in what I was buying or why. Once I paid for my new items, I took the bags home and proceeded to change into what I began calling "Casual Kasey." It involved putting on a t-shirt, sweatpant shorts, and lace ankle socks. This would be what I started wearing around the house whenever I was home alone.

Once I got past running all my problems through my head and stopped thinking about how to deal with my situation with Erica, my confusion about what I wanted, and Lisa's death, I realized I was quite worked up sexually. After all was said and done, I'd given head to a man for the first time in the real world that I could actually remember, and I'd been entranced by Erica's bare legs in her pink shorts, and through it all I hadn't gotten off.

I got the tape out of the dresser drawer. I'd thought about watching the "shemale" porn DVDs, but they didn't interest me in the way another viewing of me in a cheerleader uniform giving head to six different guys, most of which I saw every day did. The tape had become my ultimate masturbation tool and watching it got me so worked up that I had the most intense orgasms as a result.

When I put the tape in, it began playing the snow and static sounds that followed the finale of me giving head to Chris. As much as it bothered me to watch that scene, because it was Erica's boyfriend and because he was using the tape to manipulate me, it was most often the scene I got off to. The extreme nature of it, being so wrong and so taboo, was difficult to not watch after I got really worked up watching myself with the other men.

I was about to rewind the tape to the point where Chris started filming me on my knees in the living room when I gave it a second thought. Lisa had told me there was more to the tape, something else after the snow when it appeared the tape had ended. So, instead of rewinding the tape I pressed fast forward and watched as the tape zipped through a long period of snow and a new recording began.

The new scene opened with me, dressed in a miniskirt, heels, a pink t-shirt, full makeup and my long hair in pigtails. Lisa and Marci came into the room with a cake covered with lit candles singing "happy birthday" to me. I looked delighted as I blew out the candles. Lisa, wearing her infamous much too short cut-offs and overly tight t-shirt sat down next to me excitedly. She kissed me on the cheek and went off on one of her "hunny bunny" rants while Marci asked if I was ready for my "birthday present."

I kept watching, wondering why the continuation of the tape was so important and why Lisa had told me to watch it. My being dressed as I was at my own birthday party was a bit surprising, especially with Marci there, but it was hardly a huge deal following the earlier scenes on the tape.

The birthday present was a male stripper, who came into the room accompanied by raucous dance music. He was dressed in a rather unprofessional looking policeman's uniform, and was doing a bump and grind kind of dance directly in front of me on the couch. I looked surprised but delighted, especially as he tore off his shirt and revealed a well chiseled bodybuilder's physique.

Marci and Lisa got me up on my feet. I stood, looking very wobbly in my heels, and the stripper put his arm around me and pulled me in close. He continued to bump and grind, but against my body now, and at some point his tear-away pants came off and he was grinding against me in just a very tight pair of bikini underwear.

"What the fuck..." I muttered as I watched the scene unfold. I had no memory of any of this, just as I had no memory of the Halloween party or the existence of this videotape.

On the tape I started to slide down the stripper's body. He handed me a bottle of oil and I started pouring it on his chest and biceps, massaging it into him with enthusiasm as the music kept pounding away. Then I started oiling his strong, muscular legs and yelling out something I could not hear over the music.

Moments later I pulled down his underwear and started sucking his cock. He wasn't hard when I started, but he was very well hung and it didn't take me long to get him fully erect. Once he was completely hard, I started sucking him fast and deep.

I stopped the tape, turned off the television and started at the blank screen. At first the scene had turned me on, but as I continued to watch I wondered exactly how much of my "Kasey" side had seen the light in this apparently real world I was now living in.

I ended up falling asleep on the couch. Hours later, I was awoken by a loud banging on my door. Startled, I sat up quickly and tried to pull my thoughts together enough to understand what was going on. I've never been one for waking up quickly, especially being woken up so abruptly by a loud noise.

I stumbled over to the door and looked through the view hole to see who it was, trying to remain quiet so I could pretend I wasn't home. At first I didn't recognize the face, but then I saw it was Derek, the mall rat who used to sell pretzels.

I opened the door, not even remembering that I was dressed in short shorts and lace ankle socks, and glared at him.

"What do you want?" I asked and then looked at the clock on my wall. "It is two in the morning."

"I didn't come to tell you what time it was. I figured you had clocks and shit."

"What do you want?" I asked again, this time more emphatically.

"Can I come in? Or do you have company?"

My nostrils flared as I stepped aside and motioned for him to come into my apartment. "Okay, what the fuck do you want?" I asked after closing the door.

"Nice shorts," he smirked. "Your legs look really tasty in them."

"Thanks," I said reflexively. "What do you want?"

"It seems that you have a problem, or should I say a number of problems. I would like to help you with one or more of those problems."

"What problems are those?"

"Should I list them? Well, your ex-girlfriend was run over by a truck, but I don't know if that really qualifies as a problem. It seems more like that was a problem being taken care of. Come to think of it, I do believe that problem was solved. The truck was kind of a neat idea, wasn't it? Mr. Smith's Smoked Sausages? Pretty hilarious."

"You ran over Lisa?" I snapped at him angrily before throwing him up against the wall.

"No, I didn't run over her, but I know who did. A fellow named Mr. Smith we both used to work for once upon a time in a galaxy far, far away. Mr. Smith's Smoked Sausages? Get it?"

"Fuck you," I said and tossed him down onto the floor. "I'm calling the police."

"I would not recommend that," Derek said from his place on the floor. "Sure, I guess they could go look for Mr. Smith and take him in for questioning and it would be like one of those scenes from one of those cop shows where they put him in some grim interrogation room and play good cop/bad cop with him, but do you think Mr. Smith is going to break under pressure? When it comes down to it, all you have is the name you think you saw on the truck, and my word that I think he did it, versus Mr. Smith the manipulative, abusive son of a bitch who turns nice boys like us into whores."

"Okay, I'll listen to your bullshit then. What other problems do I have that you can help me with?"

"Well, how about that sex tape of you where you suck a bunch of dudes at a party and then get fucked by some hunky stripper? Seems to me you'd rather there not be copies of said tape being passed around like Kasey was passed around in a galaxy far, far away. Am I right?"

"Wait a minute. Did you say 'fucked'?"

"Oh my, didn't get to that part yet, did you? Ah well, at least it was all of your own free will and everyone had a good time. The issue however is not one of 'oh my gee whiz did I get fucked by a hunky stripper?' The issue is distribution and control of this very interesting piece of archaic VHS... um, what's the word? PORN? Yes, that's it. What do you think?"

"About what, you little shit?"

"About there being copies of you in a spliced together amateur porn movie that a number of people have a copy of, that's what we are talking about. Not to mention portions of this nasty tape have been seen floating around on the Internet. What to do, Kasey. What to do."

"My name is Keith," I said as I glared at him.

"In pink shorts with legs like a goddess, I think not. Maybe if you are cruising for boys at the leather bar, but you are a princess and you need a princess name. How about Erica?"

"What about her?"

"Oh, what about HER? I forgot, that is the name of your beautiful dream girl who is always just out of reach. So sad. I guess that would not be a good name for you... UNLESS, perhaps, you don't want to be WITH Erica as much as you want to BE Erica. Catch my drift?"

"No, I don't. That's absurd."

"Is it?" Derek asked and jumped up off the floor, landing in a crouch and dancing like a monkey around my feet. "Just IMAGINE! What would it be like if you were that beautiful blonde woman that you love with all your heart?"

I shook my head and pushed him away from me.

As I turned around, ostensibly to open the door and show him out, Derek leaped towards me, still in his crouch.

"You could be INSIDE her all the time! You could be PART of her always! She's got nice legs, I hear, so you wouldn't have to give up that most favorite asset of yours. So many benefits, don't you think?"

"Get out."

Derek leaped up to a standing position, brushed some imaginary dirt off the front of his shirt and leaned towards me and whispered, "I wonder if she sucks cock as well as you do?"

I punched him directly in the mouth, hard enough to cause his head to snap back, but he rebounded quickly, turned and spit some blood out of his mouth, and then smiled.

"Don't knock it if you haven't tried it," he sang in a falsetto voice as he danced idiotically out the door.

I slammed the door in his face, just as he turned back towards me. I locked and bolted the door and went back inside. Wanting a cigarette, which I rarely smoked, I stepped out onto my balcony. As I lit the cigarette, I saw Derek continuing to dance like a fool across the parking lot on the other side of the swimming pool

. 

He was loudly singing Madonna's "Like a Virgin."

By the time I finished the cigarette, he was gone, or at least there was no sign of him being in the area. When I went inside, I went straight to my bedroom and passed out on top of my bed. I didn't wake up again until the alarm went off telling me it was time to get ready for work.

At work, all I could think about was the tape, and when the guys who had been on the tape crossed my path in the course of my day, all I could think about was how I'd sucked their cocks. They didn't seem to act in any way that could be considered an acknowledgment of that night having happened. They acted like anyone else I interacted with at my job.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 17



It felt like nothing had happened. I had no memory of that night and it seemed as if no one else did either. One guy who had been on the tape with me casually asked me, when we saw each other while getting coffee in the break room, "Did you see the game this weekend? Hell of a way to lose a game, eh?"

"Didn't see it," I confessed.

"Oh yeah, I forgot, you're not much of a sports fan."

That conversation, like every other one I had at the office, betrayed no knowledge or reference to my "other life" as Kasey the crossdresser who liked to go down on men.

As I walked out to the parking lot at the end of the work day, I felt as if maybe it could be like this. Maybe it really was as if it never happened.

Then I saw one of my co-workers, a guy named Tom, standing beside my car in the parking lot. I greeted him casually, asked him "What's up?" as I got out my keys. He had been one of the men I'd gone down on at the Halloween party.

"Let's take a ride," he said very plainly.

"A ride to where?" I asked.

"Just a little drive, so we can talk," he said.

I let him in the car and we started driving around the block. He was quiet for a moment, looking as if he were searching for the right words before finally breaking the silence.

"We all got a copy of the tape," he told me while looking out the window. "It was part of the arrangement, that way no one could edit themselves out of the tape and use it against the rest of us. That was a crazy night, and Chris was a real dick about not destroying the tape. It got kind of ugly and we came to this stupid deal."

"So, everyone kept a copy? What about Jeff?"

"Yeah, all of us guys who were there got a copy. Marci and Lisa got copies. There were some other people there, two chicks I think, but they didn't get a copy because they weren't in that, um, part of the movie, well, you know what I mean."

"So, just the party?" I asked, concerned about whether or not the additional footage of the birthday party stripper was part of the shared copy of the tape. The fact that Jeff had a copy without mentioning it when he helped me move was another issue altogether.

"Yeah, isn't that bad enough?"

I laughed nervously. "Yeah, that's bad enough. So, why are you telling me this now?"

"I know Lisa got killed Saturday, and Marci called me after it happened. We dated on and off for a while, you know, Marci and me. Anyway, she thought we should get together and destroy the tapes, which is fine if no one made another copy. The guys here at work agree with me, but the problem is Chris. No one trusts that motherfucker. And word is he put it on some amateur porn site on the web, although we've looked for it and no one has ever found it."

"Look, Tom, no one wants to make those tapes go away more than I do. Lisa gave me her copy just before she died. Then she told me about how there were other copies, but the thing is, if everyone destroys their copies, then according to your story, what keeps Chris from editing a cut that takes him out of it and makes everyone else look bad?"

"That's the problem, and it is a big problem, because we can't trust him. We know what he wants, and we're pretty sure he'll destroy his copies and let the whole thing die, but only if he gets what he wants."

"Which is?"

"All you have to do is stay away from his girlfriend, like completely. Marci said Chris proposed to her and the only reason she hasn't accepted is because of you. If you don't back off, and if she turns him down or breaks up with him, then he's going to make sure she sees the tape and who knows who else. None of us want that. We all want to pretend that shit never went down, you get what I'm saying?"

"I get what you're saying, but no deal. It sounds easy, but it isn't. I'm in love with Erica and it is very mutual. How can you ask me to walk away from her just so she can marry someone as twisted and evil as Chris? No way. We need to find another way."

"Erica might say she's in love with you, Keith, but what is she going to say if he shows her that tape?"

"I'm working on that."

"So, let me ask you something. Was that just a kind of a one-time thing for you? What I mean is, for the guys it was just a crazy, stupid, wild spur of the moment thing, but for you it seemed to be, I don't know, something more than that. I mean, you seemed to know what you were doing and all, and the way your legs looked and the way you walked in heels at the party..."

"Are you asking me if I dress up and go down on men all the time?"

"Well, not like all the time," Tom said, talking so fast that he started tripping over his words. "I'm not trying to give you a hard time or anything, I'm just curious about whether or not you've... what I mean to say is, it seemed like you'd done that kind of thing before is all."

"And with if I have? And what if I do it all the time? Is that a problem for you?"

Tom got flustered by my response. "No, that's cool. I've got no problem with that or anything. Whatever you do is cool, I'm not judging you or anything. I just... I don't know how to put this... I just wondered if maybe I could come over some time and, well, maybe you could dress up kind of like you did that night and you know, we could just take it from there or whatever... you know, if that's cool with you and everything. I wouldn't tell anyone."

I smiled and told him, "Are you doing anything later tonight?"



Kasey's Confession Ch. 18



I got dressed up in a miniskirt, thong panties, my pink five inch heels with laces that wrapped around my foot and up around my ankle. There was my usual pink t-shirt to go with it, and I also put on some light makeup consisting of mascara, eye-liner and a very subtle shade of lipstick. It was getting better at putting on makeup, and my troubles with being able to properly apply lipstick were starting to fade with practice.

I didn't want to seem too eager when Tom arrived, but I also wanted to make certain he knew that I was trying to look sexy for him. The experience at work, being around men I'd gone down on while drunk and dressed at a party and having them act as if it never happened, was both comforting and disappointing at the same time. It was a whole bag of mixed feelings. I was glad they were being very discrete about what had gone down that night, but it also made me feel unappreciated.

Tom's desire to come over and see me dressed made me feel desirable again and helped to wash away the feeling I got from men pretending I'd never gone down on them and acting as if they weren't turned on by my antics when I was dressed like a cheerleader and acting like a sex-crazed coed.

"Wow," Tom said when I opened the door upon his arrival. "You look... hot."

"Thanks," I said with a smile I couldn't control and which spread across my entire face. "Come on in."

"So, just to make sure, this just stays between us, right?" Tom asked nervously after stepping into my apartment. "I mean, not that I'm saying anything is going to happen or anything, but you know what I mean, I don't want anyone talking about it or rumors spreading or anything like that..."

"Don't worry about it," I told him, "I'm not going to say anything to anyone. This is just you and me hanging out and no one needs to know about it. Can I get you a beer or anything?"

"Sure, thanks."

He sat down on the couch in the living room while I went to the kitchen and brought back two beers. I walked confidently out to the living room in my heels and handed him one of the beers and then took a seat in the chair opposite him and crossed my legs. 

"Damn, you really have gorgeous legs," he said, the bottle of beer in his hand shaking visibly.

"Thank you for saying so. I work hard to keep them looking this way, and to be honest, the reason I do it is so men can enjoy looking at them, touching them, so on and so forth."

"Well, I definitely enjoy looking," Tom said, his beer bottle still jumping about in his shaky hand.

"Just looking?" I asked with a devilish grin as I stood up and walked over to where he was sitting.

As I stood in front of him, I was as close as I could be to Tom without falling over him. I wanted him to touch me. I wanted to feel his hands on me, on my bare legs. I was aching for his touch and I knew I would soon be aching for more.

Tom reached out very tentatively towards my legs and then brushed the back of his hand along the length of my outer thigh. "I'm not gay or anything," he insisted on saying, "I love my wife and I've never been even remotely interested in being with a man." 

"Does a man have legs like these?" I asked as my devilish grin widened. "Just think of me as a sexy woman who would never tell your wife and will always keep our little get-togethers quiet and discrete."

"No MAN has legs like THESE," Tom blurted out as the back of his hand brushed along the side of my knee and then up along my inner thigh. "Your legs are fucking unbelievable."

I could not help but notice the growing bulge in Tom's pants. The aching inside me grew deeper and stronger as I stared at it while Tom continued running his hands up and down my legs.

"I want to suck you so bad," I said desperately before biting my lower lip while still staring at his crotch. "Is that wrong?"

Tom gently pulled me down so I was sitting on his left knee. "We all said we regretted what happened at that Halloween party, but I've come to realize that even though we were all drunk and high off our asses, we didn't do anything we didn't somehow want to, deep inside or whatever. Our self-control, and our whatever, went by the wayside and we acted on impulse. Just as you might have regretted doing what you did, we regretted letting ourselves and you get into that position. Did we regret getting what turned into really, really good head? I know I didn't."

"You thought I gave really good head?" I said, feeling suddenly like an excited little girl.

"Everyone did, Kasey. Hell, everyone got off. A guy doesn't get off from a sex act he isn't enjoying. Why were we all so hard if we thought it was so nasty and disgusting and wrong? Well, I guess that was part of it, but yeah, you gave us all really awesome blowjobs."

I smiled and got up off his knee and stood directly in front of Tom, summoning the courage to get down on my knees in front of him as I watched him slowly take off his pants and slide them down.

"I'd like to think of you as Keith's twin sister Kasey, who looks great in a skirt and gives great head without any strings attached," Tom said as he kicked off his shoes and worked his pants down over his feet. "Is that something you can live with?"

"It sounds perfect," I purred and went down on my knees.

"You don't have to do this," Tom said as I slid my fingers around his hard cock.

"I want to," I replied as I felt the softness of the tender flesh around the hardness of his erection and tilted the swollen head towards my mouth.

Going down on Bob the previous day had been an experience in opening a door I wasn't sure I'd ever opened before, despite the evidence. When I took Tom's cock into my mouth it was an experience in realizing how much I wanted that door to stay open.

I loved how Tom's cock was different than Bob's. It was probably not quite six inches but it was very thick and the shaft was wider than the head. It was like a long bullet, unlike Bob's longer and thinner cock with its broad, mushroom head. I thought about the differences as Tom's cock slid into my mouth and as I drew back in order to spit on it to help it slide back and forth with greater ease.

As I traced along the edge of his cock head with my tongue, and then lightly flickered along the soft but coarse flesh of the head, Tom moaned out, "Oh fuck, that is SO GOOD..."

Slowly sliding my lips over and then down the full length of Tom's cock, I felt my body tremble. There was a feeling of such joy and such fulfillment that I got when I sucked a cock. Being on my knees, dressed in a skirt and heels with makeup on my face and my hair in pigtails, I felt as if an important part of who I was got to come out to play, and was able to be accepted and enjoyed. It was like a victory over all my doubts and misgivings.

I watched Tom's reactions as I sucked up and down on his cock, licked at the tip, swirled my tongue around the head, and sucked each of his big balls in turn. When he reacted strongly, showing he was being taken to a higher level of ecstasy, I continued what I was doing with greater intensity. If there was something he reacted to by relaxing the tension building in his body or drifting away from full concentration on the blowjob I was giving him, I minimized the time spent on that particular element or maneuver.

As much as I enjoyed having a hard cock in my mouth, as much as I loved the taste of it and the way it felt as it filled me, the most important part of giving head to me was making sure the recipients of my blowjobs had the most intense and orgasmic experience possible.

The added benefit to that was, of course, that when they came they tended to explode like a rocket and shoot enough cum in the process that when I swallowed or ate it all up I could feel it sitting down in my stomach like the most beautiful of all snack food.

Unlike with Bob's orgasm, which caught me unprepared and overwhelmed me, I was ready for Tom's. When I felt Tom's body lurching and seizing to the point where I knew he was about to peak, I held onto the shaft of his cock tightly and stroked back and forth while holding the head between my lips. When he came, it shot directly into my mouth rather than down my throat, and I was able to swallow it slowly. I managed to get his entire load down in five small swallows, and when I was done I was proud of myself.

"Damn, you give great head," Tom said after taking a few moments to recover. "Shit, I wouldn't mind making this a regular thing."

"I was hoping you'd say that," I told him as I stood up and went to the kitchen to bring us both a fresh beer. "Anytime you want to get together, you can call, or better yet, when you see me at work you can ask me if my sister is, you know, available."

Tom laughed. "That's funny. I like that."

Sensing that Tom needed some distance now that he'd cum, I sat down on the chair across from him and crossed my legs while we talked. Neither of us had any desire to engage in any sort of post-orgasmic intimacy, and even though he had gotten off in glorious style and I was still packing a loaded gun, so to speak, I had absolutely no desire to ask him for reciprocation. It wasn't anything I had any interest in, and I knew he would almost certainly have no interest in trying to do for me what I'd done for him. I liked to pretend I was a woman and preferred to keep my gun in the holster where I could forget about it when I was with a man.

Our conversation as we drank our beers was completely non-sexual. We talked about random things like the beer we were drinking, a song that had been on the radio so often that it had become really annoying, and how much certain people at work had no idea how to do their jobs.

After we finished the beers, Tom got up and said he needed to "head on home." I walked with him to the door in my heels. "Thanks for the beer," he said as he walked out, "and for everything else."

"Anytime, Tom," I told him, following him out to the stairs. He walked down to the ground floor and then out to his car.

I turned around to go back into my apartment and realized the door had closed behind me. It automatically locked, leaving me outside in makeup, pigtails, a pink t-shirt, miniskirt and heels. I tried to discretely call out to Tom, hoping he could somehow get the management office to let me in without my having to confront them myself, but he drove off without seeing my predicament.

It was almost ten o'clock at night and I knew that although the complex manager wasn't in the office, there was a phone outside the office to use for emergencies and situations such as mine, although I imagine they'd never had a guy in a skirt and heels call them to get back in his apartment before. 

With my only real option being to call to be let into my apartment, I picked up the phone and told the man who answered that I'd locked myself out of my apartment and asked if he could let me in.

He seemed very friendly and understanding and said, "I'll be right over" after getting my apartment number and name.

I stood outside my apartment and watched the parking lot for the complex security or maintenance man to arrive. My apartment complex had outdoor hallways and staircases rather than enclosed, indoor hallways and staircases, so I could watch for the inevitable arrival of the man who would get me into my apartment, and with whom I imagined I would have a very awkward and embarrassing encounter with.

The complex staff travelled around the complex in golf carts, so when I saw one pull up on the sidewalk below my apartment I knew it was time to take a deep breath and prepare for the inevitable humiliation that was now only seconds away.

The man came up the stairs. He was dressed in a green shirt with a patch on one side with the name of the apartment complex on one side and his name on the other. Something about him was very familiar, and it became even more familiar as he got to the top of the stairs and I saw the name on his patch.

The name on his patch was "Jay J." and he looked just like the man I'd known from the place I'd gone to in my coma who called himself J.J.

"We meet again," Jay said, with no real reaction to the way I was dressed. He was smiling and shaking his head, seeming to indicate that I'd been in predicaments like this before, even though I'd only been living at this apartment complex for a couple of weeks and didn't remember having seen him around during that time.

"Again?" I asked.

"You don't remember?" he said, looking disappointed but amused. "It has been a little while, but I thought I was more memorable than apparently I am."

Jay had a big ring of keys and went through them carefully, looking at the numbers on them before settling on the one that opened the door to my apartment.

"Are you going to invite me in?" Jay asked before slipping the key into the lock on my apartment door. "I'm on duty and so forth, but I get messages forwarded to my cell phone. Besides, it is a shocker if I get more than one call a night when I'm on."

"I guess," I said nervously, not sure how I knew Jay and feeling very weird about how he did not seem to notice in any way how I was dressed. "Do you want a beer or something?"

"That would be nice," he said, opening my door and walking in ahead of me.

After we were both inside and I closed the door behind me, Jay took himself around my apartment on a self-guided tour.

"I've been in this unit a few times, but I like what you've done with it," he said while walking around. "Looks like you've had a gentleman friend over this evening."

"What do you mean?" I asked nervously, still trying to figure out how and why I knew Jay aside from his appearance as J.J. elsewhere.

"I see the telltale signs," he laughed. "There are the empty beer bottles, two by the couch and two more by the chair, indicating that two people were drinking them. Not to mention the fact that you locked yourself out of your apartment in a skirt and heels, yeah, it isn't that hard to put it together."

"I'm really not sure who you are," I told him.

"I'm the on-call maintenance man tonight," he snickered. "You called to get a pass key into your apartment. So, are you going to get us each a beer or should I just help myself?"

I went to the kitchen and brought back two beers, handing him one and putting mine down while I leaned down to start taking off my heels. I felt ridiculous continuing to wear them and my feet were killing me.

"Leave 'em on," Jay said.

"What?"

"Those shoes, leave 'em on; your legs look great in them."

It was the first reference Jay had made to my appearance and how I was dressed since he arrived to let me into my apartment.

"I'd really like to take them off," I said and kept untying the laces that wrapped around my ankle. "They aren't very comfortable."

"Suit yourself," shrugged Jay before taking a long pull off his beer bottle. "I'm just saying, you look really hot in them."

"How do we know each other?" I asked, straight out. "I'm sorry if I don't remember, but I was in an accident a while back and my memory is still very foggy on a lot of things."

"Well," he began and then took another long drink from the beer bottle, finishing it in the process, "I used to work at that club downtown. Do you remember Archie's? I was a bouncer there for a while until I hurt my back breaking up a fight outside one night."

"So, I used to go there?"

"Yeah, dressed a lot like you are now, and one night you got into it with these guys who were making fun of your girlfriend, the one you used to go down there with. They were making fun of her for being, well, a bit on the heavy side and you stood up to them, which I thought was incredibly brave since you were wearing heels at the time. I got in there and cracked their heads together and threw them out and you, well, you wanted to thank me."

"Did I..."

Jay laughed. "I said you wanted to thank me, not that you did, other than actually saying 'thank you.' The thing is, I'm gay and people don't think I am because I don't act effeminate or whatever, well, I'm sure you know the stereotype. That said, I had a lot of hookups and one night stands when I was younger and it wasn't my deal. I'm seeing a really great guy named Sid. We've been together for about a year and that's my scene. It's cool, whatever you are into, but honestly, I just wanted a beer, and maybe to check out those legs of yours again. You are a lot sexier than the drag queens and CDs we usually saw down at Archie's."

I breathed a sigh of relief as the nervousness I felt about Jay potentially demanding to be serviced sexually went away. It wasn't that I wasn't interested in the possibility of going down on him, it was that I didn't like the idea of being backed into a corner and pushed into a situation I wasn't really prepared for.

Jay put down his empty beer bottle on the kitchen table and told me to "have a good night" before leaving. I thanked him again and made sure I didn't wander outside my apartment without my keys when I gave him a quick wave as he descended the stairs.

After I closed the door and went back inside, I found myself facing the same dilemma I had the day before. I was extremely worked up after giving Tom head and then having the encounter with Jay. I sat down on the couch, stretched my legs out in front of me, pulled my penis out of my panties and started stroking myself.

I got the videotape and put it back on. It resumed where I had stopped it, at the point where I was rubbing oil on the body of the muscular stripper who was, at the point, only wearing blue bikini underwear. He was bumping and grinding up against me for quite some time before I started grabbing at his cock through his underwear and then, encountered no resistance; I pulled down his bikini underpants and dropped down on my knees in front of him.

"Well, he's kind of a guy," laughed Marci as I started stroking the stripper's semi-erect cock with my right hand and looking up at him longingly.

"That wasn't the point," replied the stripper. "I'm really not supposed to be doing this."

"When you were at my friend Amy's bachelorette party and she wanted to do you, I remember you telling her she wasn't your 'type'. So, is Kasey your type? He's a fagged out guy in a skirt. He said he wanted a male stripper for his birthday, after all."

The camera was stationary throughout the scene with the stripper. Lisa and Marci were the only other people in the room as far as I could tell and the stationary nature of the camera convinced me it was set up on a tripod rather than being operated by someone like Chris.

Holding onto the stripper's cock, which was getting quite hard at that point, I slid up and down his naked and oiled body before wrapping my lips around his cock and sucking it.

"You are so fucking gay," Marci was laughing as I sucked wildly on the stripper's cock. "Why don't you just admit it? You'd be a lot happier."

I turned the video off at that point and threw the remote control on the floor. Watching the tape had convinced me that there were things that happened before my coma that I not only didn't remember, but that were starting to make less sense to me as I put the pieces together.

There was a loud crash out by the swimming pool and I rushed over to my balcony to see what it was. Not seeing anything through the sliding glass door, I opened it and went outside. Looking out and around the pool I saw nothing unusual until I looked over the side of my balcony railing and down at the ground below. There was a trash can that had been knocked over. It had most likely been knocked over by Derek, who was climbing up to my balcony like a monkey.

"Hey, sexy legs," Derek said as he climbed over the railing and dropped down onto the floor of my balcony. "How'd the date with Bob go?"

"None of your business," I told him. "Is that what you climbed up the side of my building for? I have a front door, you know."




Kasey's Confession Ch. 18



"Eh, too predictable," he said, grinning like the madman he was. "I enjoy dramatic entrances, dramatic exits, dramatic tension, and the way YOU relieve a man's tension... ooh, did I say too much? I'm sorry."

"What do you WANT?"

"May I come inside?" he asked as he pulled open my sliding glass door and walked into my apartment. "Did you see what I did there? May I come inside? I hear you like it now if men ask if they can cum inside you rather than just assume, but I know you do like the feeling of cum sliding down your throat and oozing out of your cute little ass—"

"What the fuck do you want?" I was getting the urge to punch him in the mouth again, but I tried to control myself.

"I've come to help, like I said before. I've come to help with your various problems. For now, I'd like to help you with a different problem than the ones we discussed earlier."

"Did Mr. Smith run over Lisa or have someone do it?" I asked. "Give me a straight answer or fuck off."

"If he didn't do it himself then he definitely got someone to do it. There is no doubt in my mind that he was behind it and that it wasn't an accident. You know, your ex-girlfriend was screwing him the day of the accident and he knew she was going to meet you about something. Put the pieces together and 'yay!' they start to make sense, know what I mean?"

"So, Mr. Smith is the big guy she was with the day I came to get my stuff out of her house?"

"Yeah, he's like six and a half feet tall. The guy is a freakin' monster in more ways than one, well, in three ways anyway."

"Who was the other guy? She was doing two guys in the bedroom when I showed up."

"Glenn? Kind of goofy looking older guy, balding quite a bit?"

"Yeah, that sounds like him."

"He's like Mr. Smith's plaything, always doing whatever Smith tells him to do like the perfect little stooge. He had quite a little affair with your girlfriend when you were in that coma, but then Mr. Smith found out about it, and one thing led to another and there you go."

"Look, Derek, I think you are a complete dick and the only reason I'm talking to you instead of throwing you off my balcony is because you seem to know things I need to know and can help me figure out things I can't figure out on my own. Do you understand what I mean?"

"Sure thing, cowgirl."

"Maybe you could do me a small favor and stop acting like a total ass all the time?"

"How about you stop teasing me with your tight little ass all the time, babycakes?"

"Fuck you," I snorted. "What do you know about Chris and the movie he made?"

"I know there are a number of copies and rumors of it being on some amateur porn site," Derek said, acting overly pleasant and professional. "I know that he kept the movie after a certain party got out of control instead of erasing the naughty bits or destroying the tape because he realized he could use it to keep you away from his girlfriend. You know, one of those 'back off or she'll see the tape' kind of deals."

"Is there any way to get the tape from him?"

"Well, miss naughty pants," Derek said, suddenly transforming himself into a flamboyantly gay man who was prancing about waving his arms wildly as he talked, "the thing is, Chris is a hard nut to crack, but the one little bitty thing you do have as leverage is that he's in the tape himself being a very naughty boy. If it wasn't for that little nugget of serious shit he would have already shown her the darned thing."

"He could have edited himself out."

"Hasn't anyone explained to you yet that this is why there are OTHER COPIES? So that if he edits the tape to take himself out of it to shame the other fellas on the tape they can produce copies that have him front and center?"

"Mutually assured destruction?"

"Bingo! Clear the board! We have a winner!"

Derek leaped into the air and landed ass-first on my couch. He pulled out a long tube of something from his pants pocket and held it up for me to see.

"What's that?" I asked.

"Something to take the edge off," he said and tossed the tube casually onto my coffee table. Then he pulled something else out of his pants pocket, which appeared to be a very fat joint. "Something else to take the edge off; you need something to take the edge off, sweetie pie, you are so tense right now you could explode into a million tiny little pink pieces and no one would ever be able to find them all and put you back together again!"

"I don't want to get high right now," I told him. "And not with you, anyway."

"Bah humbug! This is medical marijuana so it is perfectly safe! I get it because I'm seriously unhinged and have wild mood swings that make me unpredictable and dangerous."

"And they gave you a prescription for medical marijuana because of that?"

"Prescription? No, nothing like that! Heavens, no, I got it from a guy on 10th street for ten bucks after telling him I was feeling really down lately."

"And he cared that you were feeling 'down'?"

"I don't think so, but I told him anyway. He just wanted the money. Doesn't it look like a nice fat joint? I know you like them nice and long and fat and juicy just like I do! Come on, Kasey baby, let's get high and chill out."

"Oh hell," I sighed. "Light that thing up."

"Yay! Gonna smoke da green with little miss hot pants!" Derek squealed as he produced a lighter and lit the joint. "Ya gotta take that edge off every now and then, don't cha know?"

As we smoked, I got more relaxed, and it felt good to do so. I got us each a beer and sat down, and as the joint burned past the halfway point I found myself feeling very lightheaded and openly horny. We started talking about men and their cocks and how some were just so much better to suck on than others. I stopped being angry with him and at some point I put my legs across his lap.

"This is where the other little thing I bought comes into play," said a giggling Derek as he snatched up the little tube he had brought with him. "This stuff feels INCREDIBLE when you massage it into your skin. I use it all the time when I want to toss one off. It is some kind of sensual love oil from ancient Greece or something. Or maybe it is from Columbia, I don't know."

"Damn," I said as he opened the tube and squeezed a generous amount on his hands. "Are you going to start jacking off or something?"

"Well, let me just show you a little something," he said, still giggling incessantly. He took his hand, which held the quantity of goop he had pushed out of the tube, and started rubbing it on my thighs. He started with the top of my right thigh and then started using both of his hands to work in an additional quantity of his magic goop down and along the inside and outside of my thigh.

It didn't take long before I felt an intense tingly feeling all over my thigh. It felt warm and erotic, like a thousand tiny fingers touching and groping at my thigh. I bent my knee and lifted it like a sudden reflex, which allowed him to rub more of the goop down the back of my thigh.

I had grown a full erection during the process and it popped out of my panties, becoming completely visible to Derek from under my very short skirt. He started applying more of the goop to my left thigh and then down each of my calves. While I writhed about in uncontrollable ecstasy, he worked his way up and very casually applied a generous amount of the goop to the full length of my cock, only briefly stroking me to make sure it was applied evenly down the shaft to my balls and over and around the head of my achingly hard penis.

My thoughts seemed to go blank as all I could think about was how good I felt. I didn't have enough hands to fulfill the overwhelming desire to touch and fondle my legs. Derek was spreading more of the goop onto my feet while using it on his own cock, which was as small as it was in the other place I'd met him. He was stroking himself while rubbing my feet, which felt really good, but I could not touch myself enough.

I started tucking my erection, which looked to have turned completely white as it got harder than I could remember it ever getting before, between my thighs and rubbing it back and forth. Soon, both Derek and I were moaning loudly and without pause.

I used both my hands to feverously rub my thighs and to move them back and forth over my stiff cock. Derek was now using both his hands to push my feet together. With my high arches, there was a very distinct opening between my feet as they were held together. Derek wasted little time in sliding his cock into that opening which holding my feet tightly together.

The orgasm that washed over me moments later was unbelievably intense. My body began jerking and it felt like I was having a seizure. My legs kicked forward and I inadvertently kicked Derek in the face. Watching me twitch and flail about, Derek kept jerking off and just before I was able to get control of my spasms I felt his semen shoot out of him and onto my legs and stomach.

Out of breath, I slid off the couch and onto the floor, gasping and groaning as I reached out and tried to grab hold of Derek.

"I have to wash this shit off," I told him. "This is too fucking intense. Tell me you can wash it off with soap and water."

"Yeah, it washes off, but it's best if you sit in a tub full of soapy water for an hour or so."

Derek reached down and snatched up what was left of the tube while I started crawling to the bathroom, feeling the intensity of sensation starting to build up after my orgasm. Derek went into my kitchen and washed his hands vigorously. Then, still having not put his pants back on, he walked over to my television and pressed the rewind button.

"No, not that damned tape," I pleaded as I felt the need to touch and fondle my legs and my dick again. "Please, Derek, help me get to the shower..."

"You'll get there when you're ready," he said as he pressed play and I saw myself at the Halloween party, still wearing the demon mask and boots. "You know you love this tape and you love what you did that night. Why don't you just accept it?"

I could feel my cock getting hard in anticipation of what I was about to watch, once again, on the videotape.



Kasey's Confession Ch. 19



I woke up very early in the morning, having fallen asleep in my bathtub. The water had turned ice cold, which along with the discomfort of having my head planted in the corner of the tiled wall, had jolted me into an early awakening.

Tuesday was Lisa's funeral, and I had the day off for it. In the morning, after getting some more sleep back in my bed, I would go to an appointment with Dr. Duckworth the psychiatrist.

Dr. Duckworth seemed primarily concerned with my memory and overall brain function. When I reported that I'd gone back to my job and been able to pick up the duties and nuances of my former workplace without much trouble, he was very pleased. When I reported that my memory was coming back, that I was slowly remembering the details of my relationships with the people in my life, he was very pleased. When I reported there were certain things I had been told about or shown that I didn't remember at all, he gave me the business card of a therapist.

"I'd like you to see Karen," he said after handing me the card. "She is a very good therapist and can help you with your memory issues. In my opinion, your memory is coming back at a very respectable rate, but what I think you are now dealing with is repressed memories. These things you cannot remember, which you have been very vague about, are probably memories you have repressed. The fact that you are so vague about them while being very descriptive with me about the memories you now recall points in that direction."

I looked at the card and saw that this therapist, Karen Sonne, was a sex therapist.

"Sex therapist?" I questioned.

"Trust me," said Dr. Duckworth, "I am rather observant and have a better idea about your repressed memories than you think I do. I've been doing what I do for a long time."

When I got home, I changed into a jacket and tie for Lisa's funeral. At the service, her family, and many of her friends, gave me the cold shoulder. Marci and Erica were there together and I was thankful that Chris was absent. They came and sat with me through the service and stood with me at the burial.

"Are you going to be okay?" Marci asked. Erica was being rather silent, and I figured it was because she was still upset over my remark that Chris was an 'asshole.' She didn't seem upset at me, just quiet and much more reserved that she normally was. 

"Yeah, I think so," I told them both.

As we walked back to our cars at the cemetery, I walked past a man I recognized as Lisa's brother. As I passed he glared at me and muttered "faggot" under his breath. I stopped for a moment, feeling very angry about his remark, but took a deep breath and kept walking. 

I wondered how much about me Lisa had shared with family and friends. Seeing the way they avoided me, gave me the cold shoulder, and muttered remarks about me gave me the impression she had been very open about sharing intimate details about me. It didn't upset me as much as make me sad. She had wanted me to be the boyfriend she imagined me to be and I didn't meet those specifications, so naturally she had needed a few shoulders to cry on.

What really started to eat away at me was how all these people seemed to know about my activities as "Kasey" and yet Erica seemed to know very little. She knew that I shaved my legs, but she didn't know about my crossdressing until I told her about it, and as far as she knew my only involvement with men sexually had been in fantasies.

There was a get-together after the funeral, but I told those people who were speaking to me that I just wanted to go home. I didn't want to deal with the dirty looks and the cold shoulder treatment any longer than I had to.

"Would you mind if I tagged along?" Marci asked when I said I was going home.

"Sure, why not," I said.

Erica had already announced that she was going back to work, and when I said "goodbye" to her she responded with "goodbye, you guys," addressing myself and Marci along with anyone who was around us. The way she was acting towards me was more depressing to me than the funeral.

I made a drink for Marci and myself after we got to my apartment. I told her I wanted to change out of my jacket and tie and was about to go into my bedroom and change when she made an unexpected suggestion.

"Why don't you put on a skirt and heels," she said.

"What?"

"I just figured with it being only the two of us, and with you being more comfortable dressed as Kasey..."

"More comfortable?" I asked, feigning disbelief.

"You seemed pretty comfortable on Halloween, and on your birthday, and Tom told me you were very comfortable when you put on a skirt and heels for him last night."

I sighed; upset that Tom had told Marci about our evening together when he said it would be our little secret. I knew they had dated off and on at one point, but had not expected him to share details of our get together with her, especially not so quickly after it happened.

"Come on, let me see those legs," Marci pleaded through the closed door to my bedroom after I went in to change. "Let me see those hot cocksucker legs... or are you going to start denying you are a cocksucker? Well, whatever."

I didn't put on a skirt and heels, but I did change into what I'd come to call "Kasey casual," which involved putting on a pair of short shorts made of sweatshirt type material, lace-topped ankle socks and a pink t-shirt. When I came out of the bedroom, acting as casual as possible, I found Marci in the living room sipping at her drink. Mine was on the coffee table.

"Damn, you have nice legs," she said as I walked into the living room. "I am jealous."

"Thanks," I said, smiling coyly as I picked up my drink and sat down on the couch.

"You know," said Marci, who was sitting across from me on my favorite chair, "Tom actually had the gall to tell me that you give better head than I do. What a dickhead. I guess I shouldn't be surprised since he keeps insisting he loves his little wife while still coming over to my place every other weekend. And then it wasn't difficult at all to convince him to let you blow him again. I needed to make sure you got a taste so you'd remember what you really love."

I coughed abruptly, as I was in the middle of swallowing a good amount of my beverage when she spoke and I hadn't been expecting her comment to be as direct as it was.

"Yeah," I said once I collected myself and my little choking episode was concluded, "I honestly thought he was going to keep his mouth shut, but there's no sense in me trying to deny it."

"The Halloween party was my fault, really," she said as she stirred the ice cubes in her drink with her finger.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I encouraged you to dress like that for the party, and to keep just the uniform on when we got back to your place. When Lisa, rest her soul, started trying to make out with everyone and you were getting upset and drunk, I kind of encouraged the guys and you. They started out joking about how you looked like you wanted dick more than Lisa did and, well, I've always been pretty good at manipulating people, especially when they are drunk or high or both."

"I'd really rather not talk about that," I sighed. "It wasn't exactly my finest moment, and whether or not you egged everyone on isn't what really matters. You didn't make anyone do what they did that night."

"Don't be so sure of that," she said as I finished my drink and got up to get another. "I might have slipped a little something in your drink that made you more, um, suggestible."

"Like what?" I asked after checking to see she didn't need another drink.

"It doesn't matter what, just that I did, so you weren't completely acting of your own free will."

"Are you apologizing?" I asked after returning with my fresh drink.

"You know I don't apologize very often," she told me. "I knew what you needed and I made it happen. Now that you know you love getting dick, don't you feel more liberated?"

"I don't know if I'd go that far."

I was starting to feel dizzy, and needed to hold onto the wall as I stumbled towards the couch and sat down. My head was spinning and everything started to look and feel very confusing to me.

"I have to confess," Marci said with a big grin, "I rather get off on seeing you push your limits. You are just so damned uptight, though, and in my opinion you need someone like me to help you push those limits."

I could barely process what she was saying. I closed my eyes, hoping it would stop the room from spinning, but had to open them again when I got spooked by the sudden darkness that came as a result of having my eyes shut.

"I invited a couple of friends over. I hope you don't mind." Then she laughed as she added, "Of course you don't mind, I mean, these friends have big cocks and that is what you really like."

"Wait, no, Marci, look..." I trailed off in mid-thought as I tried to stand up and my legs buckled underneath me.

The doorbell rang and Marci got up with a huge grin on her face. "It is so funny that you thought it was Chris who was behind the whole videotape and blackmail thing. It was just too perfect that he brought his camera and was filming the party, but I was the one who got you down on your knees that night. I was the one who told someone to get Chris and his camera out of the kitchen when it started going down, and I was the one who told him, after he wanted to destroy the tape, that he could use the threat of showing it to people to keep you away from Erica. And honestly, Keith, what the hell is a cocksucker like you going to do with Erica anyway? Go to the beauty parlor together?"

Marci was laughing heartily when she opened the door. Two men came into my apartment while I struggled to try to get up and pull myself together. I couldn't focus and couldn't find my balance. Every time I tried to stand, I would stumble. Every time I tried to figure out how to shake the confusion out of my mind it would get more intense.

"Keith, or Kasey, or whatever your name is," Marci said while laughing at me, "these are a couple of friends of mine. This tall handsome fellow is Mr. Smith and his friend's name is Glenn."

"No, please," I muttered as I climbed up on the couch, "I need you all to go. I can't..."

As Mr. Smith and Glenn gathered around me, laughing as they watched me struggling, Marci kept talking.

"Well, Lisa wanted to be together with you forever, and Erica wanted to win your heart so you'd love her above all others, but all I wanted was to watch you become what you truly are and what you were always destined to be, a pathetic cock loving sissy slut. I watched you suck off a room full of guys. I watched you get fucked. Now I want to see how you handle a cock in both ends."

"I can't... do this..."

"Oh, don't worry, I gave you just enough special sauce so you won't be able to resist your true desires. I didn't give you enough so you'd pass out or stop being functional," she told me before leaning in and making a squeaking sound while saying, "You lean back into the cock in your ass, SQUEAK, then lean forward so the cock in your mouth slides deep down your throat, SQUEEEEEEEAK, then back against the one in your ass, SQUEEEEEEAAAAAK, and everyone has a good time."

I tried to protest, but Mr. Smith, who was now completely naked, spoke over my pathetic attempts to stop what they had planned for me by saying, "Shut up, sissy. You know you want it."

Glenn was handing a video camera to Marci and pointing out something on it. As I saw them with the camera, I again tried to verbalize a protest but all I could do was quietly make incoherent noises.

While Glenn stripped, Marci walked towards me with the camera, which she had not yet turned on.

"You see, now that Lisa is gone the only thing standing in my way is Erica. Now, I could always show her the tape of you at the party, but then she's going to be mad at Chris as well and we want to make sure they get married and live happily ever after. I could show her just the birthday party with the stripper, but, as it turns out, he was her cousin. So, the problem there is that she could talk to him and find out I was the one who pushed him into it, and pushed you into it as well. I need a clean tape of you just loving it up with two men at the same time so I can show her what a total faggot you are."

Glenn and Mr. Smith came closer and circled around me. I realized I was already on my knees after having stumbled. Marci turned on the camera and they held their big, hard cocks out in front of my face and started taunting me by saying "You know you want it" and "Suck it."

I turned towards the camera and managed to shout out, in a hoarse voice, "Marci drugged me and is forcing me to do this!"

She lowered the camera and sighed. "I can just have that edited out, you know."

"Go to Hell," I told her with my voice cracking.

She walked towards me, shaking her head, and then tousled my hair before saying, "I never wanted you to be my boyfriend. I'm not pathetic like Lisa and I'm not trying to play at being Little Miss Perfect like Erica. That shit makes me want to throw up. The two of them make me sick, and between needy Lisa and fake Erica, I don't know which is worse. I got rid of Lisa because she was just too disgusting and was always just in the way, but I needed to keep Erica around. Do you know why?"

I just stared at her as Mr. Smith and Glenn stood waving their cocks around on either side of my head.

"Well, sissy faggot, I wanted Erica to see you for what you really are and watch you become a complete cock slut. I also wanted you to have to watch her marry Chris and have kids with him and live happily ever after, all while you are on your knees in an alley sucking some guy for ten bucks trying to score enough to get your next fix. Ah, such a beautiful and tragic ending to a sickening love story."

I weakly shoved her away and started crawling across the floor. The room kept spinning, but her words were starting to make sense to me. They didn't make sense because they sounded like the ideas of a sane and rational person. They made sense in that I could understand what she was saying and talking about. 

I remembered my experiences in the place I had been during my coma and I was not about to have a repeat of that life. I wasn't crazy. Marci was the crazy one, and not only did she want to turn me into some kind of depraved junkie hooker, she had all but admitted she was behind Lisa's death.

"I am not doing this," I struggled to say. "Get the fuck out of my apartment, all of you."

Marci let out a huge sigh. "Well, sweet cheeks, no one is going to force you to do anything. That would just make you look like a victim and your beloved Erica will probably swoop in on her angel wings and take you in her arms."

"So... get... out..." I said as the spinning room got more blurry and I fell, face first onto the floor.

Mr. Smith and Glenn grabbed my arms on either side and pulled me up so that I was on my knees. The room kept spinning, but they came closer so their big, hard, veiny cocks were right in my face.

"Come on, you know you want it," I heard Marci's voice say, surrounded by the sound of laughter, both hers and the two men.

"Oh wow," I gasped as I reached out and took Mr. Smith's huge cock in my hand. "This is a beautiful cock."

"That's it, now suck on it," said Mr. Smith.

The room was still spinning, but more slowly, and I was able to regain some composure. Feeling Mr. Smith's big cock in my hand I felt the urge to let it go and again demand they get out of my apartment and leave me alone. Yet, I wanted to suck him, and Glenn, so badly that it became a dilemma, a battle raging in my mind that became more intense as I looked at Marci, who was pointing the camera at me and grinning from ear to ear.

"Come on," she said. "Are you going to deny yourself what you really want just because you hope Erica will leave Chris and marry you instead of him? How are you going to be happy with her? She doesn't have a cock."

I heard her words but had trouble processing them. What I heard was "Erica doesn't love you" and "Erica is marrying Chris" and then realized I was on my knees between two men and holding their hard cocks in each of my hands.

"What are you waiting for, Kasey?" Marci asked from behind the camera. "This is what you really want. Look at those two big, thick, juicy, yummy cocks... waiting for you to suck them."

I slowly slid my lips over the head of Mr. Smith's cock and then pulled away suddenly. A flash of memory, scenes from my experience with Mr. Smith in the "other world" ran through my mind. My confusion subsided and the room stopped spinning. A shock of realization jolted me back to a position where I had self-control and full knowledge of what I was doing.

I got up, pushing Mr. Smith and Glenn away, and walked towards Marci. I ripped the camera out of her hand and broke the door to the slot where the tape was and pulled it out. She took several steps back, a look of shock on her face, and took several minutes to recover her wits.

"I told you all to get the fuck out of my apartment," I said angrily, holding onto the tape and throwing the camera on the floor. "Now, get OUT!"

I expected an argument from Marci or even some kind of effort from the two men to force me to have sex with them. I anticipated the possibility of being raped and was relieved when it didn't happen. Marci quietly took the camera and walked towards the door, leaving the tape on the floor. Mr. Smith and Glenn got dressed quickly and, without saying a word, followed after her.

"I'm going to let people know what you did," I told Marci. "You're a psycho."

"And who, exactly, is going to believe you? Your little mall rat friend? Like anyone would believe anything he said. I can act really innocent when I want to. You bought it for twenty years."

After I closed the door and locked it, I stumbled over to the couch and fell onto it. I'd snapped out of the fog brought on by whatever Marci had drugged me with in order to deal with a crisis, but after that passed, I was dizzy and confused again and had trouble keeping my balance.

"Why didn't she have them just force me?" I asked myself. Then I realized it wouldn't fit with Marci's plan. She wanted me to willingly have sex with Mr. Smith and Glenn while she videotaped it all. If I wasn't going along with it willingly and demonstrating that it was what I wanted, through my body language and verbalization, then it would looked like I was forced into it. That would make Mr. Smith and Glenn look like rapists and her like a willing participant for taping it.

Eventually I got up, and when I did the first thing I did was to smash the tape she had started making. Then I got the other tape, with the stripper and Halloween party, and smashed it as well.

Looking up, I saw Derek out on my balcony dancing around like an uncoordinated version of Michael Jackson.

"What do you want?" I asked as I opened the sliding glass door.

"A box of chocolates and a long-stemmed rose would be nice."

"I'm a little unsteady and a bit confused, so can we cut the whole 'I'm a freak' act for the time being?"

"Oh, sure, you don't need to pretend you aren't a freak on my account," he said, bounding past me and into my apartment. "Did you get any dick today?"

"I'd rather not get into that. What do you know about Marci and what she has to do with the whole sex tape?"

"Marci, you say?" Derek crouched down, picked up the smashed videotapes and sniffed at them. "Is she connected to the tapes? I know she was there on both occasions, but other than that..."

"She says she was behind the whole thing and that Chris was basically just following her lead."

"Well, THAT is a whole different ballgame, isn't it? Or it would be, if it were ACTUALLY TRUE!"

"I believe her," I said, very seriously. "She was here with Mr. Smith and his goon and told me she was the one who masterminded the whole sex tape blackmail scheme and that she was the one who was behind Lisa getting killed."




Kasey's Confession Ch. 19



"Dude, you know something?" Derek said, dropping the broken videotapes and scratching at his chin as if deep in thought. "Dude, this makes a really weird kind of sense to me? How would Chris know you were a wannabe cocksucker before that party? And Chris wasn't even there when that hot stripper dude popped your cherry. That probably isn't even on Chris' copy of the tape. You might be ON TO SOMETHING HERE!"

"I really need to pass out or take a nap or something," I told Derek. "They slipped me something and I'm not all there."

"Fair enough!" Derek exclaimed as he bounded towards my front door. "Let me go and pay a little EXTRA attention to your old pal Marci and see what I can see. That cool with you, dudette?"

"Yeah, and then I have to take care of something important, which I can't remember what exactly it is at the moment."

"Okay," Derek said, opening the door before dashing out. "Catch you later, sleeping beauty!"

I passed out where I fell, across my bed still wearing my t-shirt and shorts. My sleep was haunted by horrific nightmares that placed me back in the world I had been a part of during my coma. I was once again a modified version of myself with female parts and a brain that barely worked. Men kept coming into my bedroom, forcing themselves upon me and, and treating me to extremely rough treatment and they made me satisfy their most perverse sexual desires.

I woke up in a sweat, with clear evidence that I had ejaculated in my sleep, which I hadn't done since being a teenager. It was four o'clock in the morning and all I could think about was how much I wanted a man so I could suck his cock and make him feel good.

I turned on my computer and went to check my email. Still only half-awake I hit something on my sign-in screen that brought up a different email account that began with the name "KaseySmoothlegs." I had only a vague memory of having such a secondary email account and decided to sign into it.

There was a long list of unread emails dating back to before I went into a coma. Many asked where I'd been and what was going on. Some said they'd enjoyed meeting me. Some were very explicit in stating the kind of oral services I had provided them or that they wanted me to provide.

I went to make coffee and came back to find I had gotten instant messages from three different men. They all seemed surprised and excited to see me signed in again, apparently for the first time in almost a year.

I responded to them vaguely, saying I'd been away and was just checking emails. One asked if I was "looking for early morning company." I replied by saying I was barely awake and having my first cup of coffee and made a joke about not being very presentable. He said, "I've missed our early morning get-togethers and I bet a lot of other guys have as well." I said I wasn't much of a morning person and kept trying to make light of the situation. He said, "I haven't gotten a decent blowjob since the last time I saw you."

I didn't respond, at least not immediately. I stared at his message and thought about just signing out and walking away. Then he emailed me a picture he said was of himself, which turned out to be a photo he had taken of me on my knees in front of him, taken from his point of view. I was wearing the black teddy I'd found amongst my clothes after the move. I was licking his cock and looking up at him with a big smile. The heading of the email said, "Remember?"

Two more men sent me instant messages and those I'd already responded to were asking what I was doing and if I wanted to get together some time. I kept my responses vague, telling them all that I was just waking up and checking emails. 

I stared at the picture and tried to decide how I was going to answer Hank, the man who had sent the picture. It was quite obviously me, so we had hooked up before, unless it was a picture of me with someone else that had been circulating.

"Are you still with Lisa?" asked the next message from Hank. "Or did you and Erica finally get together?"

"I live alone now," I said without further explication.

"That makes it easier. It was always tricky waiting for her to leave so we could play."

I didn't want to tell Hank I didn't remember him or getting together with him in the past. I definitely didn't remember the picture being taken. 

I had a serious craving for some hard cock to start the day, so after a long pause I typed back to him, "I could go for some sausage with my eggs this morning."

The idea of giving Hank my address and having him come over gave me very mixed feelings. He talked to me like he knew me, and like he had often been over to see me before when I lived with Lisa. I just had no real memory of him, although I was starting to remember meeting men online through my "KaseySmoothlegs" name.

After Hank messaged me saying he understood I needed discretion and said he'd always used it in the past, I threw caution to the wind and sent him my address and directions. Then I took a shower and changed into my black teddy and waited while sipping my coffee.

I was amazed and overwhelmed by how desperately I wanted to suck a cock. The fact that I had invited a man over at four o'clock in the morning, a man that for all intents and purposes I didn't know, but who knew me, was unsettling but at the same time sent a rush of excitement through my body.

I'd signed out of my email account, but kept the picture of me sucking Hank's cock up on my screen. I stared at it while I drank my coffee. His cock wasn't huge. It was a very nice size, a little bigger than the average and the head looked very soft and juicy, like a ripe strawberry. I was beside myself with excitement and anticipation.

When Hank arrived, I offered him a cup of coffee and asked him to sit down. I sat across from him and chose my words very carefully.

"Okay, here's the deal," I began, "I love sucking cock. I love being submissive to men. I love being called names, being treated roughly, and being humiliated. With that said, there are some very important rules. You don't own me. You don't come over without an invitation. I am not available whenever you feel like busting a nut. The submissive Kasey that does whatever you want however you want only exists during the time agreed upon, when you are invited and until I say it is over. When I say 'no' it means 'no.' If I say 'stop,' you stop. When I say 'get out of my apartment', you will get up and leave without question. No one owns me. We get together and we role play. I'm the sexy slut and you are the man who has a hard-on for me and we take care of business and call it a day. Does that work for you?"

"As long as you agree that when I'm invited over, I expect to get my cock sucked and I'm not going to play any games where you change your mind after I come over and I waste my time. When you finish getting me off, then I leave. I don't want to hang around and chitchat. As far as I am concerned, you are a sissy cocksucker who likes to prance around in girlie clothes and you belong on your knees."

Hank dropped his pants and I dropped down on my knees in front of him thinking to myself, "This is how it needs to be." Without hesitation I took his cock in my left hand and stroked it while gently rubbing his balls with my right.

"Suck it, you leg-shaving faggot," he said.

I leaned in and kissed the tip before sliding my lips over the head and sucked on it while I continued stroking his shaft and massing his balls very gently.

"Make me cum, you fucking sissy cocksucker! I need to get to work!"

I stroked him faster, then spit on his cock before aggressively sliding the entire length of his cock into my mouth. While continuing to lightly work his balls, I sucked back and forth quickly while keeping my jaw as tight around his cock as possible. 

"Suck it, faggot! Suck it!" he moaned as I worked him quickly towards an orgasm, sucking deep and fast while occasionally slowing down just for a few seconds, then kissing and licking up and down the full length of his cock before engulfing it and sucking it quickly once again.

"Oh yeah! Oh yeah, cocksucking sissy boy! SUCK IT!" he yelled as he approached orgasm. Then, when I could feel him tense up and about it cum, he yelled out, "Take it on the face! Take it on the face you pathetic CD whore!"

I pulled it out of my mouth and stroked it fast and hard until he tensed up completely and his cum shot directly into my face. He kept shooting, four and then five smaller ejaculations after the first big one. When he was done, I could feel his cum dripping off my face and hair.

"That was awesome," he said. "I've really missed you, Kasey. I'll let you know when I need to get sucked off again. Have a great day."

"It is already starting out that way."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 20



When I met with the therapist, who insisted I call her Karen, the first thing I noticed about her was she was wearing a rather short skirt. It wasn't anywhere near as short as the skirts I wore, but it was cut above the knee and when she sat down it rode midway up her thigh.

I also noticed that she had insanely beautiful legs. During our session it became very distracting as I attempted to discuss issues pertaining to my coma, my memory problems, and my struggles to come to terms with my sexuality, which I still could not define. I loved and desired women and sought a meaningful, loving and passionate relationship with one. More specifically I sought to be with Erica and hoped that she could accept me the way that I was, but I also feared that my overwhelming desire to be submissive to men and satisfy them sexually would prevent any such relationship from ever really happening.

That fear caused me to redirect my conversation with Karen. She was very attractive and had legs that were nearly as beautiful as Erica's and the idea of telling her I'd been with a number of men sexually triggered defensiveness inside of me. Talking about that with her meant removing any chance she would be attracted to me or interested in a relationship with me. Even though she was my therapist and it would be unprofessional of her to even consider such things, there was a part of me that automatically connected the two concepts. Letting a potential female mate know I was actively involved in pleasing men sexually set off a red light inside me that told me not to go there.

"I'm still putting my memories back together," I told her. "Some things have been easy, like remembering how to do my job and everything involved with that. Other things have come much slower, like the nature of my relationships with different people."

"Such as?"

"Well, such as how well I know certain people, like if this guy I work with is someone I'm just friendly with at work or if we hang around outside of work and if we just talk about sports and cars and guy things or if we talk about more personal things. It is hard to remember where those, um, boundaries are, I guess you could say."

"How about the sexual boundaries?" she asked.

"What do you mean? Like remembering if I've slept with a woman or just had a drink or two with her?"

"I mean the sexual boundaries with the men you work with and those you are friends with."

"You mean the women?"

"Okay, let's talk about that. I understand you recently had someone very close to you pass away."

"An ex-girlfriend," I said, finding myself automatically emphasizing the 'girl' part of the statement. "We'd been together for three years or so but it wasn't a very, how do you say, um, healthy relationship."

"And her death?"

"It was an accident, and I saw it happen, she was hit by a truck crossing the street."

"How did you react when you saw that?"

"I was angry, upset, and I guess I was really sad."

"Did you feel like you were responsible?"

"How so? I wasn't driving the truck..."

"That isn't what I mean. You said you were together for three years and split up."

"Breaking up with her didn't cause her to get hit by the truck. No I don't blame myself because of that. Well, according to some people I apparently used to say things like 'I wish she'd get hit by a truck' when I was upset with her or angry."

"So, you figured that was a coincidence and nothing more?"

"Well, not at first when someone told me I'd said that more than once. Then I figured, you know, no one can wish things to happen and then have them happen. I'm more angry about who it was that was driving the truck that hit her and why he didn't stop or anything. The thing is, I think I know who was behind it but I don't have any way to prove it."

"I see," she said. "Do you think you are maybe trying to resolve your anger and maybe, I know you said you don't feel responsible, but maybe you are trying to resolve your feelings of guilt and anger by putting a face on whoever the driver of the truck was?"

"It isn't like that," I said defensively. "I've had people come up to me and basically tell me they were responsible and then taunt me about it."

"Actual people?"

"Yes, actual people," I groaned. "Do you think I'm imagining people telling me they hit Lisa?"

"I didn't say that."

"You implied it."

"I'm just asking questions so I can better understand where you are right now," she said. "Why do you think you are attracted to me?"

"Excuse me?"

"Just a question. Every time you answer a question or talk about something, you start by looking straight at me, but after a couple seconds you start staring at my legs."

"Well, you have beautiful legs," I said and folded my arms in front of me. "I have a thing for women's legs and yours are very distracting."

"Now you're being honest with me, and that's good. So, you're not so much attracted to me as you are to my legs? Or is it that you see me as an authority figure, someone you feel you are putting yourself into a vulnerable position with if you open yourself up to?"

"I find you very attractive," I told her. "I really like women a lot, I'm very big into women, and I date women all the time. I probably date too many women and sleep with too many women and I should probably not see so many women all the time because I'm just so crazy about women and..."

"Do you think it is at all unusual that you felt the need to say 'women' so often when you made that statement?"

"I didn't... I mean, maybe a couple times..."

"Let me ask you something, and this is just a hypothetical question, not any kind of invitation. Let's say it was possible for us to become involved sexually, which it isn't, but say I offered you a choice of two options. The first would be that we went to a very nice hotel room, ordered room service, and then made love. The second choice would involve you kneeling in front of me, licking the bottom of my shoe and saying 'yes, ms. Karen' to me. Which option would appeal to you more?"

I coughed and sputtered as I tried to answer the question, attempting to laugh off the question and tell her "the first option, of course' but finding myself unable to lie to such an extent. The second option was much more appealing to me, but I didn't want to admit it.

"The second option, then," she said calmly after seeing my reaction. "That isn't wrong. There are no wrong choices, Keith. Do you think you try to convince people you are a certain way because you feel that your sexual needs make you some kind of deviant?"

"You mean because I sleep with so many women?" I asked after collecting myself, once again emphasizing the word 'women' in my response.

"You can lie to me and put on the mask you wear in front of others, but then why are you seeing me, Keith? I'm not someone you are trying to romance or seduce. This is a professional relationship and I am a sex therapist. You were referred to me because Dr. Duckworth feels you have some very deeply repressed feelings, desires and fetishes that you are refusing to admit to yourself or deal with. If you just want to play around and put on this whole 'I'm a man and I sleep with a lot of women' façade, we're not going to get anywhere and you are wasting my time as well as yours."

I looked at the floor and nodded. "I'm sorry," I said.

"There is no reason to be sorry. I am not here to judge you or tell you what you feel is wrong. That isn't what I do. What I do is try to help you to understand yourself better so that you can hopefully live a happier and more positive life. You need to stop thinking of me as a woman you are trying to pick up in a bar."

"If you asked me to," I said as I looked up at Karen, "I would lick the bottom of your shoe without hesitation."

"I'm not going to ask you to," she said with a smile. "The reason I'm smiling is because you are starting to be honest with me and not lie to try to impress me. That's progress."

"I've been sexually submissive with men," I said after taking a deep breath. "I don't know how many men I was with before my coma, but since I came out of it I have been with three men, including one early this morning that I invited to my apartment and gave oral sex to while on my knees. That's what I've been trying to keep a secret."

"And if it wasn't a secret?"

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

"This session isn't about me, Keith. Are you trying to avoid the question?"

"No, I'm asking because it is important as far as understanding why I do what I do."

"I'm not saying I will answer your question, but you can ask."

"When you wear a skirt like you're wearing and someone like me keeps looking at and admiring your legs, how does that make you feel?"

"Well, I would say that wearing short skirts the way I do indicates that I have a certain level of confidence in how I look in them, and that it probably indicates that I want people to notice the way I look in them."

"I'm told I have very nice legs. I don't mean for a man, I mean relative to how a woman looks in a skirt or shorts. I shave my legs, I keep them tan and in shape, and I like to wear short skirts and short shorts and high heels and so forth. I like when men notice. I like the effect I have on men when I am dressed that way. I also feel a compulsion to satisfy them sexually when they become aroused by how I look when I am dressed that way."

"Did this start after you came out of your coma, or has it been part of your identity before that?"

"That is something that bothers me. Apparently I've been doing this for some time, as in dressing like a woman and meeting men. I have seen videos and photographs of myself, um, performing oral sex on men while in a skirt and heels. The thing is, I don't remember any of it, but the evidence is everywhere. At the same time, when I was in that coma, it was as if I was in another world similar to this one but in it I was extremely sexual and submissive and it reached the point where I had nothing in my life outside of being dressed and submitting to men."

"Is this a fear of yours? Losing control of this aspect of who you are to the point where it takes over your life?"

"Yes, I think that might be the biggest issue I'm dealing with right now."

After the session, I went back to work. Tom was avoiding me, but eventually I got him alone in the break room and confronted him about why he had told Marci about our little get-together when he assured me it would be "our little secret."

"Look, I'm sorry," he said as he tried to get away from me, "Marci came to see me that night and she can be very persuasive. She kept asking me if I was sleeping with anyone else and kept pushing it until finally I said I wasn't sleeping with anyone else but I'd been to see you and you sucked my dick."

"She's crazy," I told him. "Not just crazy but full on psycho. I'd stay away from her if you want to keep your brain in one piece."

"Yeah, well, it takes one to know one," he snapped and stormed out of the break room.

I was upset when I went back to my desk, trying to get perspective on how I'd made the mistake of trusting Tom and how he'd turned around and told Marci about how I'd dressed up for him and given him head. 

Then another co-worker, Tony, who I remembered well from watching the video of the Halloween party countless times, came up to my desk. I remembered him well because he'd had the biggest cock of the six men I'd gone down on and could not stop thinking about it anytime I walked past him.

"Everything okay?" he asked me. "You seem upset."

"I'm fine," I lied. "I'm just dealing with a lot of bullshit right now and trying not to think about it."

"People can be really cruel sometimes, especially if you're different or do things they don't think are normal," he said calmly. "If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm available."

"Well, I don't want to talk about it here," I said as two people walked past my cubicle. "Would you be interested in coming by my place later on tonight?"

I was being bold, as I appreciated Tony's efforts at being understanding but also wondered if maybe he was trying to see if he could wrangle a hook up with Kasey rather than simply trying to be a friend to Keith.

"I tell you what," Tony said after a moment as he waited for the area to clear of people, "I would love to come by your place later. We could talk, we could maybe have a beer or two, and maybe I could tell you how I wish you came to work in a skirt every day."

I tried to act incredulous, and then play his last remark off as a joke. "That's, um, funny. I needed a laugh, so thanks for that."

"You have great legs, Keith, it's a shame you can't show them off at work. That's all I'm saying and I'm not joking."

"Thanks," I said and blushed in response, looking down at my computer keyboard and trying to look busy but instead knocking several pens and a stapler onto the floor.

"So, if I were to come over later to talk and have a couple of beers, do you think you might be wearing a skirt and heels like, I dunno, you might wear at the office if you could?" Tony said with a wink.

"I... I... could do that," I stammered as I tried to collect myself, unable to think about anything other than Tony's big hard cock.

"Great," grinned Tony, "I'll see you around seven or so."

Keeping with Tony's theme of wearing a skirt to work, I dressed fairly modestly in a mid-thigh length black skirt, three-inch heels and a blouse that could pass for business casual. By the time seven o'clock rolled around I was chomping at the bit for a bit of "dressed for the office" role playing.

I also couldn't stop thinking about Tony's big cock, especially since I'd destroyed the tape and could no longer watch it for reference.

When the doorbell rang I checked first before opening. After I saw Tony's face I opened the door and was greeted with a surprise. Tony had brought along two of my other co-workers, Neil and Ted, who had also been on the infamous Halloween party tape.

"I didn't know... you were all..."

Standing there wearing a skirt and heels along with a woman's blouse, I suddenly felt out of sorts and overwhelmed. I found myself stuttering and flapping about and closed the door without first letting them in. Moments after I did that, a quiet knocking came from the other side.

"Keith, open the door. Come on, we came over to see you in that skirt and have some beers. Don't get all freaked out."

Tony was very calm, but I remained nervous even after opening the door and letting them in. I had considered quickly changing into pants and sneakers, but decided I needed to stop hiding.

When Tony told me he wished I could wear a skirt and heels to work every day, it put a picture in my imagination I could not erase. The idea of being able to go to work dressed like a girl and flirting and teasing the men I worked with gave me a great rush of excitement. Letting these three men, who had already experienced my cock sucking skills, see me as I was became an extension of the office fantasy.

"Come in," I said as I stepped aside. "Can I get you gentlemen a beer?"

"Sure thing," Neil said. "So, are we no longer playing Kasey the airhead cheerleader? Is it now Kasey the office suck pig?"

"Dude, that's harsh," said Tony.

"I don't mind," I confessed. "That's one I've never been called before, but I kind of like it."

After we all got our beers, Neil and Ted sat down on the couch, Tony sat on my recliner and I took a seat in my favorite chair. I crossed my legs slowly, attempting to be seductive as the skirt slide up my thigh as I lifted one leg above the other to cross it. I made certain the boys could see my thigh all the way up to my hip as I turned slightly to give them a better view.

"You really do have beautiful legs," Neil gasped after staring at my thigh while taking a long, slow drink from his beer bottle. "That shit is crazy. I mean, you honestly should be in a skirt at work."

"Thanks," I said with a smile. "If I could, I would."

"Why can't you?" Tony asked as he jumped forward. "I mean, there isn't any rule or any law against it. Really, Keith, everyone knows about the whole 'Kasey' business and everyone knows you love to suck cock. It isn't like you would shock anyone, really."

"You'd probably be in the men's room a half dozen times a day on your knees," laughed Neil. "Walking around with legs like that, I mean, you're practically screaming 'let me suck your dick'."

"I don't want it to be a secret," I said after taking a long drink of beer. "I want people knowing that when I am dressed, I am ready, willing, and able to suck some cock. I'm sick of sneaking around and playing games."

"Well, this is like a reunion, you know? Everyone from the party is here except Tom and your friend Jeff and Chris. Put on some tunes and get the fuck on your knees, Keith; time to suck some cock."

What I saw on the video hadn't been some drunken, out of control party where I'd done things I would later regret. It was me letting out a side of me I'd kept repressed and secret. It wasn't a nightmare. It was a dream come true, and now the dream was coming true again.

I was remembering now how I had started meeting men online and then meeting them out in the real world. I remembered how I had started secretly having men over to the house I lived in with Lisa and gave them head when Lisa wasn't home. I remembered how she had come to discover my secret and how she'd joined in, having threesomes with me and a man we'd found. It had all been a secret until the party when I revealed myself to my friends.

My passion for being sexually submissive to men began with Mike, a man I'd met online who told me I wanted more than to just dress up and flirt with men. I wanted to suck cock but I was terrified of the idea at the same time. He got me past that fear and helped me discover the joy I got from going down on men. I developed a passion for sucking cock and that eventually led to a passion for taking it up the ass.

I put on some dance music and made my way back to the middle of the living room where I looked at my three co-workers and smiled. I flirted with them, danced around a little bit, and decided Neil would be the first to get a blowjob.

I stood in front of him and slowly went down on my knees in front of him. While the others made remarks like "here we go again" and "now the party is starting" I reached up and unbuckled his belt. I unbuttoned his pants, unzipped his fly, and starting pulling down his pants while he sat up just enough to allow me to get them down.

There it was: my favorite thing in the world, a beautiful, fully erect cock.

No one was forcing me to do anything. I hadn't been drugged and no one had gotten me drunk or blackmailed me into this. As I put my hand around Neil's hard cock I felt a shiver go through my body. This was very simply what I wanted.

As I licked my way from Neil's balls up the shaft of his cock, I found myself smiling and giggling with excitement. I kissed my was around the head of his cock, at first with little pecks and then with big, wet kisses that left my saliva dripping down the sides of his beautiful erection. 

I looked up at Neil and saw his head was tilted back. I could see Ted, who was on the couch just a couple feet away, watching me intently and taking a moment to adjust himself through his pants. Watching me start to give Neil head was arousing him and knowing that made me feel very sexy. I could also feel Tony's eyes watching me from behind.

"Suck that cock already," Tony said with a laugh. "Stop teasing the poor guy."

My tongue flicked at the underside of the head of Neil's cock as I opened my mouth and prepared to go down. I took my time, slowly moving my lips over and around the head and then over it, letting the head pop into my mouth before my lips slid slowly down the full length of his erection.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 20



"Damn," Neil said with a hint of breathlessness, "If Steph did this, I'd be a happy man."

One of my favorite things has always been when a man tells me I give better head than his wife, girlfriend, or even ex-girlfriend. Being the best has become, over the years, very important to me, but being "better than a girl" has always been the ultimate praise.

I bobbed up and down on Neil's cock, happily working my lips and tongue along the shaft before coming off him and running my tongue hungrily around the rim of his cock head. Smiling, I looked up at him and said, "Grab my head and force me down. Fuck my face and tell everyone how I wanted you to do it."

It has been ten years since that night, and I still remember it fondly. My veil of secrecy and denial was lifted and I openly admitted I was a cocksucker. Word of mouth was my best advertising and I no longer feared exposure and rumors. For the next ten years I would embrace dressing in my slutty girl clothes and going down on men. I would, on average, suck over four cocks a week for the next decade, and at least one would always be someone I hadn't gone down on before. I loved the way it felt to suck a guy for the first time, to surprise him with my willingness, skill and passion. 

Neil grabbed my head on either side and pulled me down on his cock. I loved the way the full length of a man's cock felt being pushed into my mouth and throat when I had no control over the speed or depth to which it filled me. Neil pulled my head up and down several times. I gagged slightly, but not enough to need to stop or catch my breath.

Neil's legs were stretched out on either side of me. They were tensed up, completely straightened out with his knees locked, and they were ever so slightly up in the air. His pulling on my head was becoming less intense, but his breathing was getting deeper and faster and his eyes were closed.

"I'm gonna blow this load all over your face," he moaned as I took charge again and began sucking him very fast and deep before wrapping my lips tightly around his cock head and working a bit of intense back and forth sucking action on it.

"Fuck!" he screamed and reached down to pull his cock away from me. He popped the head of his cock out of my mouth as I let go with my hand and let him stroke himself a couple times before he unloaded his semen into my face. The first warm shot of cum hit me in the chin. He had no read control of where he shot his load, so the smaller ejaculations that followed landed on my forehead, in my hair, and on my shoulder.

When he had completely unloaded, he fell back against the sofa and moaned. "Fuck yeah."

Ted had managed to take his pants completely off during Neil's blowjob and was sitting in just a shirt and socks at the other end of the couch. My smiled broadened as I saw he was completely hard and had been stroking himself while watching me suck Neil and take his load on my face.

"One down, two to go," I heard Tony saying with a laugh behind me. I turned and looked at him, and saw he had his very big cock out of his pants and was holding it. I wanted to suck Tony so badly. His eleven inches of thick, prime cut meat was impossible to resist. 

But I really wanted to save him for last, so I turned my back to Tony and got down on my knees in front of Ted's average sized cock and began sucking on him in much the same way I had worked Neil.

I felt Tony crouching down behind me as I sucked Ted. His hands went to my waist and I struggling to determine what he was doing while trying not to let my attention leave Ted's cock and to keep giving him the best head he'd ever gotten. 

Tony found the button that secured the skirt around my waist and then unzipped the zipper just below it. Once he did, the skirt slid down my thighs and to the floor around my knees.

"Wow," Tony said as he looked down at my ass, now covered only by the thong panties that stretched along the crack of my ass. "You've got an ass like a girl. Not a big, round, baby got back kind of girl, but like my ex who used to be on the soccer team kind of girl."

It was harder to concentrate on Ted and the pleasure I was trying to give him. With Tony crouched down behind me and my ass exposed the way it was, combined with his description of it as being like a girl's ass, all I could think about was how much I wanted him to fuck me with his big, thick cock. I knew his massive eleven inches of meat would probably tear me open and hurt like hell when it did, but I didn't care. I wanted Tony inside me so much I started panting and shaking. 

"I think the cocksucker wants you to fuck him," snickered Neil.

"I ain't fucking no guy," Tony said, "but damn if he isn't begging for it."

I had to resort to jerking Ted's cock, as I was too distracted by Tony being behind me and was having too much trouble trying to catch my breath as I imagined him fucking me. It didn't take long before Ted came, I think as much from listening to the way the other guys were talking as from me sucking and jerking his cock. I let him shoot his load in my face and then slowly lifted my head up and turned towards Tony.

I could feel my lip quivering as I looked at him, my face dripping with semen. I fought against my urge to tell him I wanted him to fuck me and then tell him how much I wanted to feel his gorgeous cock inside of me. I also fought the urge to kiss him after I turned and found his face right up in mine.

Tony grabbed me by the wrist as I reached for something to wipe my face with. "No," he said, "I want you to wear all three of our loads on your face and then we are going to take a picture."

"Of what?" I asked, somewhat horrified by the idea.

"Of your face all covered with cum."

"Why?"

"So you won't forget who you are," Tony said before dropping his pants and removing them completely. "Every guy needs a good blowjob from time to time. You provide a very valuable service and you do it so well."

I nodded silently, finding no reason to disagree with him.

He sat down in the recliner. "Now get over here and suck my big dick, you pansy cocksucker."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 21



Neil and Ted collected themselves, and before I could position myself on my knees in front of Tony, they made it clear they were leaving. I got up from the floor, steadied myself in my heels, and walked with them to the door.

"Catch you later," they intoned to me before turning to Tony and saying, "We'll be down at McMurphy's later if you want to meet up."

"We'll see," Tony told them as he watched them go out the door. McMurphy's was a bar a couple blocks away, not much more than a hole in the wall where people drank and watched whatever game was on television that night.

"Okay," I said after closing the door behind Neil and Ted and catching my breath. "Where were we?"

Tony kicked off his shoes and stood up to remove his pants completely. Then he sat back down, his cock now only partially erect, and told me, "I think you were about to get on your knees and work your cocksucker magic on me."

I wanted him hard as a rock again, and as I stood in front of him wearing just thong panties and high heels along with the kind of blouse a woman would wear to the office I wondered what the fastest way to get him hard would be. 

"Damn, those cocksucker legs go all the way up, don't they?" Tony said with a big grin.

I could see him starting to get harder, so I turned around after taking several steps closer so he could see my ass on display for his enjoyment.

"Are you sure you wouldn't consider fucking this ass," I said in a feminine voice.

"Damn, you do have a great looking ass," he said. "I've never fucked a guy before, and I really don't think I could."

"You could," I said as I turned around. "I am VERY willing to let you fuck my ass, but if you don't want to, I completely understand."

My eyes widened as I saw he was once again rock hard and that he was stroking himself slowly as he looked at me. I didn't need any encouragement to walk towards him and then kneel down in front of him and his beautiful cock.

"Are you sure you can handle this after you gave Neil and Ted blowjobs?" Tony asked, looking mildly concerned as I put my hand around his massive erection.

I smiled. "Sweetie, I wish I could come home from work every night, get dressed up and suck cock all night long, from the moment I get home until I can't fight off sleep any longer."

"Damn," he moaned as I stroked his cock and started kissing the head and along the length of the shaft and down around his balls where I planted a full series of wet, tongue kisses.

"I don't want you to respect me," I told him. "I want to hear people whispering about me at work. I want people calling me 'cocksucker' and 'sissy' and 'slut' when they see me. I want everyone talking about how easy I am and how I can't get enough cock, because I can't get enough and I am all those things."

Tony laughed between moans, and after I went back to work on his cock with my tongue and lips he said, "Do you actually believe anyone respects you? Everyone at work knows about what happened on Halloween and how no one forced you into it. You practically begged everyone to let you blow them."

I traced the rim of his cock head with my tongue, then looked up at him smiling, "I'll beg if I have to, but I know what I like."

"Just shut up and suck me already, you faggot."

With my lips wrapped tightly around his cock head, I sucked back and forth on it, loving the soft and textured feel of it, while looking down the amazing length of his eleven inches of heaven and shuddered. I was never going to be able to deep throat this gorgeous monster, at least not without a lot of practice.

As I slid my lips down Tony's cock I drooled to the point of leaving puddles in the folds of his ball sack. Each times I came up and went back down, I was able to take a little more of him, and once he was hitting the back of my throat hard, I leaned forward and tried to push his cock into my throat from a more accepting position.

Eventually I gagged and had to come up off his cock to cough repeatedly and clear my throat of saliva. As I leaned against his strong thigh, coughing and trying to compose myself, he picked up my head and looked down at me.

"No one has ever been able to deep throat me before, but I do appreciate your efforts," he said before adding, "Lie down on the couch and tilt your head back over the arm rest."

"Why?" I asked after pulling myself together.

"Just a little something I saw once in a movie," he said with a wink.

He got up and helped me to lie back on the couch. I rested my head against the arm rest, but Tony had me pull myself up further so I could tilt my head back with the arm rest behind my neck and my head almost completely upside down. Then he told me to open my mouth.

Tony starting pushing his massive cock into my mouth; I started to wriggle and twitch, not feeling very comfortable in the position I was in an not being used to taking cock with my head upside down. He held onto the sides of my head and pushed himself in deeper. As I felt the head of his cock pushing into my throat, I gagged and struggled to breathe.

"Relax and breathe through your nose," he said calmly. "You are going to love this."

I tried to do as he asked, and started breathing through my nose, although relaxing was a bit too much to ask under the circumstances. He pushed his cock deeper into my throat and I felt my throat expand to accommodate the massive size of it. My body twitched and struggled, but Tony held my head firmly and continued telling me to relax and breath through my nose.

Eventually I felt his balls smack up against my nose and Tony said, "You just took eleven inches of cock, you dirty slut, and now I'm going to fuck your throat."

My hands grabbed the material of the sofa hard, almost tearing it, as I tried to steady myself and keep my body from struggling and fighting. I tried to calm myself and breathe through my nose as Tony starting slowly sliding his gigantic erection back and forth in my throat, never completely pulling it out of my throat, but moving it just enough that I could feel the motion of it back and forth along the length of my throat.

"Fuck, that feels so fucking good!" Tony yelled out once he had the motion down to a steady rhythm. "Look at you with two fucking loads on your face and my big, fat cock stretching your throat so much you can actually see the helmet moving in there. Damn, that's hot!"

I couldn't speak, but my legs kept kicking and my body kept squirming on the couch, even as I tried to hold on and tore the fabric of the sofa cushion my hand was gripping extremely tightly.

"Take it, bitch!" he yelled at me before moving his cock back and forth in my throat at a faster pace, effectively fucking my throat while holding my head in place. My kicking and squirming become more frenzied and dramatic, but he kept going until eventually my legs fell limp and my arms dropped lifelessly to my side.

Eventually I felt him tense up, but instead of trying to work out his ejaculation like I normally would, I was completely passive. He gripped my head tightly, pushed down on it hard, and then ejaculated a seemingly unending stream of cum down my throat. His cock would tense and pump, relax for a moment, then tense up and pump more cum into me. It went on like that for at least a dozen spasms of hot semen that I had no choice to let shoot directly down my throat.

When Tony pulled out and staggered over to the recliner to fall down on, I rolled over onto the floor, coughing and gagging as I coughed up most of his semen onto the floor along with a lot of my own saliva before wrapping myself into the fetal position and wheezing.

"You okay?" Tony asked while still trying to catch his own breath.

"I... I don't know..."

"You probably need to have a good cry and then get back on that horse and practice some more," Tony snickered after seeing I wasn't choking to death. "It can't be easy taking eleven inches of thick cock down your throat like that."

"No, sir, it isn't... easy..."

"Sir? I kind of like that. Helps establish who the man is here, doesn't it?"

It wasn't easy for me to talk, and I kept having to remind myself to breath normally. "Yes... sir..."

"You'll need a lot of practice, but I think you'll get the hang of taking my cock after a few more tries."

"Really? You think so? I mean, you'll let me suck your cock again? I didn't disappoint you?" I said excitedly as I pulled myself up to a sitting position.

Tony just smiled. He appeared to be holding back laughter as he looked at me sitting on the floor with semen drying on my face wearing thong panties and a woman's blouse. "Yeah, I'm sure I'll need another suck job soon enough," he chuckled.

After he left, I found myself crying, much as Tony had predicted. It became something of a traditional after I'd given a man head and he left. There was emptiness, a sense of something being missing after all was said and done. 

It wasn't that I regretted sucking cock, or sucking so much cock, but once I was alone I would find myself wondering how I would answer the voices inside that told me the things I did would always leave me alone. I didn't want a boyfriend, or even a steady man. The only reason I craved Tony more than others was because of his big cock, not because I was interested in being his "girl." I didn't want to be a girl full time.

I wanted to have two lives, one as Keith and one as Kasey, and I wanted to have a girlfriend, someone I loved and wanted to be with, someone like Erica, but could any woman accept me as her partner if they knew the double life I led and wanted to keep leading?

When I got to work the next morning, I discovered my wish had come true. People were whispering about me, looking at me sideways, winking at me, and I was the subject of numerous rumors. I had told my three co-workers who had been at my place getting blowjobs the night before that I wanted it out there and not kept secret. 

They had done well, but the depths to which the gossip spread did not become clear until I was called up to the office manager's office.

Diane, the office manager, was an older black woman who was known for having an odd sense of humor. She was also known to be strict and tough, and easily angered when things weren't running smoothly.

"Come on in, Keith," she said when I arrived at her door. I was glad to see her smiling, as she could be terrifying when upset about something. "Sit down."

I sat down on the chair across from her desk, and as I did so she stood up and walked around the desk, leaning back against it as she spoke to me.

"There's been quite a bit of talk around the office lately about you," Diane said. "Now, your personal life is your personal life, and what you do on your own time is your business. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions? They aren't necessarily job related, just more for my own edification."

"Sure, I guess," I said nervously.

"First of all, are the rumors true?"

"Well, um, I don't know how many there are or what they're all about, but I don't think anyone is saying anything that isn't true about me."

"Good, because I have a proposition for you," Diane said. "We have a client we do several million dollars' worth of business with every year. Their rep, Mr. Masters, is very demanding and difficult to please. Every few months I have to field calls from him making demands and threatening to pull out his business, and my bosses end up having to bend over backwards to keep him happy so he doesn't get his company to send his business elsewhere."

"Okay, well how can I help with that? I don't have anything to do with that account."

"Masters has something of a perverse sexual appetite. I know that a couple of our bosses tried to set him up with some high priced call girls on more than one occasion, figuring that would keep him happy and show we were 'willing to go the extra mile' as Masters calls it. The thing is, he likes his girls to be completely submissive and apparently most call girls seem to have limits when it comes to that sort of shit. He also seems to be more into, I don't know what you call it, but girlie boys who like to put on a dress and suck dick, like you do. Understand what I'm saying?"

"You want to hook me up with this Masters guy?"

"He's at his hotel, The Rose Towers, and I already told him to expect a surprise guest this afternoon. What I want you to do is put on whatever you put on when you are trying to be a sexy little faggot and go over there and show him the time of his life." 

"For the good of the company and the account?" I asked, feeling suddenly confident.

"I was hoping you'd see it my way. He's at the Towers, room 871; now go be my little superstar."

I had been ready for the gossip and the name calling and the overall whispery openness my co-workers now had about my extra-curricular activities. This was an unexpected twist. The idea of actually using my abilities and inclinations as "Kasey" to help my company satisfy a difficult client was one of the last things I imagined happening as a result of my new openness.

I only had a vague idea of what Mr. Masters liked, so I decided I would pack a bag with a variety of shoes and outfits and show up at the hotel in just a t-shirt, short shorts and sneakers. The shorts I picked were so short that the bottom of my ass cheeks peaked out as I walked, which had become my new regular thing when wearing shorts publicly.

There were plenty of stares as I walked into the hotel and went to the elevator. Two men in business suits entered the elevator before me, and after I stepped in behind them and turned my back to them while choosing the button for my floor, I heard one say to the other, "Someone sent out for a blowjob."

"I know, right?" replied the other one as they both started laughing.

"You charge extra to swallow?" the first businessman asked as I exited the elevator on the eighth floor.

"Not usually," I replied as the door closed and I walked away.

I was trying a new product I'd bought, a body lotion that contained a small amount of sparkles, or so it appeared, as whenever the light hit my beautiful tanned legs, there was a shine and twinkling that was impossible to hide. My legs had never looked so good, or so attention grabbing, as they did when I walked through the hotel filled with executives and wealthy travelers.

I wasn't sure what to expect when I met Mr. Masters. I didn't know what he looked like or anything about him, other than he represented one of my company's biggest clients. I found his door and knocked quietly.

I was about to knock again more loudly, when the door opened. Mr. Masters greeted me, wearing a white terrycloth robe that was probably issued by the hotel, and beckoned me to come inside. Before he closed the door he put the "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door handle.

"With legs like those you must be a good cocksucker," he said after closing the door and following behind me into the main room. It was a suite, with a full living room, balcony, and adjoining bedroom and bathroom.

"I try my best," I replied as I walked over to the glass balcony door and dropped my bag.

"What I mean is, when you look at yourself in the mirror and see those legs you must realize you're meant to be a cocksucker, no two ways about it."

Mr. Masters was a relatively short, balding man with a good amount of gray chest hair peeking out from his white robe. He seemed relatively pleasant, in spite of the way he addressed me, and I certainly wasn't put off by his immediate attention to my legs.

"Any guy with legs like that belongs on his knees," Masters said. "Don't you agree?"

"I know that's where I belong," I replied.

"That's the perfect answer, and so true," Masters smiled. "Can I get you a drink? Something fruity for a fruity guy?"

"Sure, whatever you have."

"What's in the bag?" he asked as he handed me some kind of rum and fruit juice drink.

"Some outfits," I said, "mostly skirts and high heels. I wasn't sure what you'd like."

"I wouldn't mind seeing you put on a pair of stilettos and walking around in those peek-a-boo shorts you're wearing."

"I can do that," I said and crouched down to open my travel bag.

"Why don't you change in the bathroom, that way it will be more fun when you come out and I can see those long cocksucker legs strutting out?"

"I can do that, if you like."

"Good," he said before lightly grabbing my arm and turning me towards him. "Your boss knows you'll be here the whole afternoon. I'm going to give you a serious workout, so I hope you ate your Wheaties this morning."

I smiled lightly and excused myself so I could go into the bathroom to change my shoes. I also needed to freshen up a bit and compose myself. Mr. Masters hadn't turned out to be as weird as I'd been worried he might be, but he was still a bit strange. Still, I knew that men who would be interested in me wouldn't usually be too normal in the usual sense.

When I came out of the bathroom in stilettos with six inch heels, Mr. Masters' jaw dropped. I loved the way really high heels made my legs look like they went on forever. I was already six feet tall, and with my slight build and weighing barely 150 lbs, I was a striking figure in six inch heels.

"Damn, you should be on the cover of Playboy, or whatever magazine has pictures of faggy guys with great fucking legs," Masters said after he collected himself.

I had spent time practicing walking in heels, and it had come fairly naturally to me. I wasn't sure if that was because I'd practiced before the coma or not, but when I strutted out with my long legs in stilettos and tight little shorts, Mr. Masters' erection popped out through the folds in his robe.

My first thought was to think, "Mission accomplished," as I was reminded of how big of a thrill it was for me to know I had aroused a man to the point of being fully and painfully erect, leaving him in dire need of my oral services.

"Can I get that for you, sir?" I asked in my best imitation of a breathless, innocent girl.

He just smiled and watched as I strutted forward and slowly went down to a kneeling position in front of him. I moved the robe aside and took his cock in my hand. It was a fairly average sized cock, but it was very, very hard and I loved the way it felt and reacted to my touch.

"Is mine the first cock you've gotten today?" he asked as he ran his fingers through my hair.

"No sir," I confessed. "I had cock for breakfast this morning. A friend came over and I made him pancakes and sucked his cock while he ate."

"Didn't you have pancakes with your friend?"

"No sir, I don't belong at the same table as a real man. I know where I belong."

"That's so marvelous," he smiled. "Get up now, it isn't time yet for cocksucking. I'll let you know when I want head. Right now I want to see you walking around with those legs in those heels."

"Yes sir," I said and got back up on my feet.

"I like to collect amateur porn," Masters said as he watched me walk back over to the balcony. "I burn these wonderful DVDs with my favorite scenes. Would you like me to put one in?"

"Sure, whatever you like, sir," I said before asking if I could open the door to the balcony and step out.

"I suppose we're too high up for you to be able to cause traffic accidents with those legs," he replied. "Go right ahead."

Mr. Masters' DVD was a collection of very amateur porn featuring couples who had generally invited a third person to join them in having sex. Most of what I could see from the window involved a man and a woman being joined by another woman, usually significantly younger woman. Some of the couples looked like they were in their fifties or sixties and they were joined by a woman who looked to be in her twenties.

Most of the scenes didn't last more than five minutes, usually starting as the threesomes were in full swing and ending with the man ejaculating on the younger woman's face. Masters sat in front of the television, watching back and forth between me and the action on the scene, often cheering the action and saying things like, "Yeah! Right on the slut's face!"




Kasey's Confession Ch. 21



"This next one is one of my favorites," Masters said, turning towards me. "The wife in this scene is really hot. Check this shit out."

The scene opened with a young woman, who looked to be in her early twenties, wearing some kind of Catholic school girl uniform with a white blouse, vest, pleated skirt, white socks pulled up to her knees and black and white shoes. She was sucking on a lollypop and looking very sad.

"She's cute, but the wife is fucking hot, keep watching," Masters said.

A man and a woman walked into the room. He was wearing a t-shirt and running shorts. The woman was wearing a transparent short black robe that barely covered her and through which her black panties were clearly visible.

It was Chris and Erica. I stared, speechless, as I looked at the woman I loved. While Chris sat down next to the young woman, putting his arm around her and acting as if he was comforting her, Erica untied her little robe and let it drop off her shoulders and to the floor. She was only wearing black panties underneath, and seeing her bare breasts for the first time, small but full and firm, completely exposed and in a video seen by who knows how many people, I was horrified but very aroused.

"Isn't that blonde incredible?" Masters asked as I stepped back into the room, my eyes glued to the television screen. "Those tits are nice, but look at those legs! If I saw her walking down the street I'd probably drive into a tree."

I just stared at the screen, unable to look away as Chris began taking off the other woman's shirt after removing the vest. He was slowly unbuttoning it while saying, "There's no reason to be alone, pretty girl, you have friends here..."

There was apparently supposed to be a plot to the video, but it didn't make a lot of sense, much like most porno movies. Erica was leaning towards the other woman, who was apparently supposed to be a young girl but looked very obviously like she was of legal age, while Chris slowly undressed her and made vague reassurances about her being "in good hands."

As more and more of the woman's uniform was stripped away, and both Chris and Erica groped her, she looked more like someone who was close to thirty years old than a teenager. They eventually worked together to get her completely naked. Chris started making out with her and fondling her breasts while Erica helped her up to a reclining position on the couch before kissing her way up the woman's legs. She started with one leg, kissing up and around her calf, knee and thigh before starting again on the other leg and doing the same thing before putting her head directly between her legs and skillfully working on the woman's pussy with her tongue.

"Oh shit!" I called out as I saw Erica go down on this woman. My mind was effectively blown.

I stared, completely frozen, as the camera went in for a close-up of Erica's tongue sliding between the other woman's pussy lips, gently licking at her clitoris, and then lifting her head up with a big smile.

"Baby, you taste like cotton candy," she said before going back down on her.

Another man walked into the shot. He was acting as if he was outraged, yelling about his "innocent daughter" and demanding to know "what you people are doing to her." He was a big man, probably six foot three, and had large, muscular biceps.

"Loosen up, man," Chris told him. 

My attention had been too focused on Erica and her skill at eating pussy to notice that the other woman was massaging Chris' cock with her hand under his running shorts. She looked up at the man who was supposed to be playing her father and told him, "I'm just having fun, daddy. Why don't you join us?"

I was very uncomfortable with the whole "daddy/daughter" theme, despite the fact that the man playing the father was no more than a few years older than the girl. I kept watching though, as Mr. Masters continued to make remarks like "look at the ass on that blonde" and "she loves munching that rug."

The man playing the father abruptly dropped his whole upset about his "daughter" being violated bit and walked over behind Erica. Her beautiful round ass was up in the air, covered only by a pair of panties, and the man put his hands on her ass and began eagerly fondling her ass cheeks with reckless abandon. Then he grabbed her panties in his fist and roughly tore them off my beloved Erica.

"This slut's been in a lot of amateur shit," Mr. Masters said as the camera came around behind Erica and gave a close up of her clean shaven vagina. I looked longingly at it, so smooth and like a perfect flower. Then "daddy man" started rubbing it with his finger and I looked away in disgust.

"She could go pro in a second," Mr. Masters said as he kept watching while I looked out through the glass door at the outside sky. "I've seen her take two in the cunt, one in the ass and one in the cunt, and even two in the ass once. People call her the queen of double penetration."

I snapped. "I have to go. I can't do this. I'm leaving."

As I stormed towards the balcony to get my sneakers and the rest of my clothes, Mr. Masters grabbed me arm.

"You're crying, sweet thing, what's the matter?"

"Nothing," I stammered, trying to stop myself from crying but realizing it was a fruitless effort.

"We can turn off the movie if it bothers you. I just thought we could set the mood a little, that's all."

"I just... have... to go..."

The movie was still playing, and while I was looking away so as not to see what was happening, I heard Erica saying, "Fuck me, baby, put your big cock in me," and I pulled away from Mr. Masters and ran into the bathroom and closed the door.

I pulled off my stilettos and threw them at the wall. I fell on the floor with my back against the wall, sobbing uncontrollably as I tried to reconcile the Erica I saw in the amateur porno with the Erica who insisted she wouldn't make love to me because she wouldn't cheat on Chris.



Kasey's Confession Ch. 22



My crying and self-pity was interrupted by Mr. Masters knocking on the bathroom door. He was knocking lightly, but enough to demonstrate that while he wasn't angry about me running off, he wanted me out of there.

"Give me... a minute," I sobbed.

He waited while I washed my face and tried to wipe away my tears. I picked the stilettos up on the floor where I'd thrown them and put them back on. I wanted to walk out and try to act like everything was just fine. Yes, I'd found out Erica had made amateur porn movies with Chris and other people, and unless Mr. Masters was lying there was more than just the one. She was trying to convince me that she couldn't even kiss me as long as she and Chris were together, all the while she was carrying on in home movies with multiple men and women?

I was horrified, but I was also done with her. I was done with her as well as with Marci and anyone associated with them. There wasn't anything I needed to prove to anyone, especially not Erica. She was the biggest slut of them all.

"I'm sorry," I told Mr. Masters after emerging from the bathroom. "I know the woman in that movie, the hot blonde, and she always used to tell me crap about not cheating on your boyfriend and being honest and then I see that..."

"I turned it off," Masters said. "I knew something about that movie was upsetting you. She was a friend of yours?"

"No one special," I lied. "Just someone who thought she was better than other people, but she's just as much a liar and a slut as everyone else."

"I would absolutely LOVE to fuck her," Mr. Masters said. "That pussy of hers is so hot, even after so many poundings, I would just love to do her. Any chance you could help me out?"

At first I wanted to hit him, but I didn't have the strength, and I was resigned to the belief that Erica was a liar who had jerked me around for two years professing love for me and a code of honesty and fidelity. My heart was breaking, and I wasn't going to defend the woman who was breaking it.

I said nothing, and Masters shrugged and said, "Well, I've watched eleven or twelve different guys fuck her, so it's almost like I already have fucked her, you know?"

I again felt like screaming at him to shut up and not talk about my beloved Erica that way, but I couldn't do it. I was becoming more naturally submissive to men, especially when I was dressed, and the reality was that he had watched her in so many porno movies putting herself out there like a piece of fuck meat that I couldn't really condemn him for his raunchy sentiments about her.

"Why don't we forget about the movie and the girl and get back to the reason I came over?" I said, realizing I had a perfect opportunity to change the conversation. "Wouldn't you rather fuck me?" I asked him as I turned around and bent over in front of him.

"Well, that's a horse of a different color," he laughed. "Look at that sweet, tight faggot ass. I would not mind pounding that one bit."

"One condition," I said slyly, feeling a sudden rage of inspiration, "whenever I suck you or fuck you or anything at all, I want you to call me 'Erica,' okay?"

"Why?" he asked stupidly.

"That's her name," I said and knelt down to kiss along the length of his hairy thigh, "the slutty blonde in the movie. That's her name."

"Mmm," he said as he watched me kissing my way up his thigh to his crotch, where I began slowly devouring his balls. "You've got my kind of dirty mind, Erica. Lick those balls, Erica, lick those balls and suck my cock, you slut."

It was a completely new high and got me more turned on and eager to please than I ever had been before. I went down on Mr. Masters with newfound enthusiasm, and he could see how much calling me "Erica" was exciting me, so he continued.

"You suck a great cock, Erica," he said as I went down on him and bobbed up and down on his cock while looking up into his eyes. "Suck it, slut, suck it real good."

He stopped me and then made me stand up. Then he hit the "play" button for the tape so it began playing again. The younger woman was going down on Chris while the "daddy" man was fucking Erica mercilessly, pounding his cock into her perfect pussy while he grunted and she moaned loudly and begged him "fuck me harder... HARDER!"

I couldn't bear to watch, but at the same time I couldn't look away. Mr. Masters stood behind me, groping my ass through my shorts and then reached around to unbutton them and started yanking them down along my thighs and then let them drop to my ankles after they passed my knees.

"You have a great ass, Erica," he said, and I was uncertain if he was talking about me or Erica on the tape, because the man was turning her over so her ass was in the air. The man on the tape then began groping her ass in the same way Masters was groping mine.

Masters pulled down my panties and I kicked them, and my shorts, away so they were no longer around my ankles. He reached into a bowl next to the couch and pulled out a condom, which he quickly unwrapped and pulled down around his throbbing cock.

The man on the tape was rubbing his cock along the crack in Erica's ass, and Masters was doing the same with me. As the man began entering Erica's ass from behind, Masters did the same with me. When Erica moaned as the man pushed into her, I did the same as Masters pushed his cock into my ass.

The man had Erica over the arm of the sofa, and I watched them intently on the screen, tears filling my eyes. Masters pulled me towards the couch and threw me over the arm of it and began to enter me again, able to much better penetrate me than when I was standing and crouching down to grant him entry.

"I love your ass," Masters said as he pushed his cock so that the head popped into my asshole. Pushing down on my back to bring my ass up higher, he pushed even harder so that the shaft of his cock began roughly penetrating me. There was no lubricant involved.

He fucked me roughly and I sobbed openly and loudly, still watching the scene on the television screen as it went in for a close-up of Erica's beautiful ass and the big cock that was splitting it and pounding her poor little asshole as hard and fast as Masters was pounding mine. Eventually, my sobs turned to moans and screams as Masters kept fucking me and calling me "Erica."

As Masters was about to cum, he pulled out of me and ripped off his condom. His semen shot across my back and he loudly moaned, "Damn, you are a great fuck!" before slapping my ass hard several times and then saying very plainly, "Get dressed and get out of here. I need to get to a meeting."

My ass was incredibly sore, but I gathered up my things as quickly as I could. I put my panties and shorts back on, cleaned myself up in the bathroom, and after a struggle got my socks and sneakers on, picked up my travel bag and came back out to the main room.

"I'll be wanting to see you again," Mr. Masters said with a smirk. "You are a wonderful slut, so eager to please, and that crying is such a turn on."

"Thank you, sir," I said as I realized I still had tears in my eyes despite no longer crying vocally.

There were so many thoughts swirling around in my head that I didn't realize, or care, that I was driving back to work in my shorts. When I walked through the front door I drew stares from the receptionist and others gathered in the area, but I was so numb with thoughts about how I'd gone to a hotel room to let a client of the company fuck me, and the shocking revelations about Erica, I thought nothing of it.

"Keith, honey, get in here," said the voice of Diane, the office manager, who was standing outside her office glaring at me.

"Yes, ma'am," I said quietly before following her into her office.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she snapped at me after closing the door behind us.

"Ma'am?" I was genuinely confused.

"When you come to work in this office you come to work dressed professionally. No matter what you are doing outside of this office, when you come here you are dressed appropriately. Am I making myself clear?"

The realization hit me suddenly. With my mind as preoccupied as it was, how I was dressed hadn't even been an afterthought. Once Diane pointed it out, I felt suddenly ashamed and embarrassed.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think—"

"No, you didn't think," she said. Diane walked around me like a drill sergeant inspecting her troops, shaking her head and fuming.

"I can go home and change," I said. "Please don't fire me or write me up."

Diane laughed. "You have become too valuable for that. Mr. Masters called me right after you left and said he was 'very pleased' with you. He's very interested in seeing you again."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Damn though, you have legs most women would die for," she said with a smile. "In all the time you've worked here I never imagined you could be such an asset."

"Thank you, ma'am."

"Mr. Womble has heard about the work you did today keeping an important client satisfied," Diane said, referring to the company president. "He'd like to thank you personally, however with the way you are dressed, showing up like this, I'm not sure I should allow it."

"I can go home and change and be back in a half hour, ma'am."

She kept pacing back and forth in front of me, looking me up and down. "Do you have fucking glitter on your legs?"

"I use a lotion that has glitter, yes ma'am."

"Do you even have balls, Keith? You are the sorriest excuse for a man I've ever seen. You shave your legs and go to the tanning salon and put glitter lotion on yourself and prance about in those shorts with your ass hanging out of them and you are supposed to be a man?"

I choked on my words, unable to respond as I felt myself starting to cry again.

"Oh Lord, you are pathetic," Diane sighed as she saw me getting choked up and the tears welling up in my eyes. "You're not a man, you're a pathetic, dick sucking sissy crybaby."

My hands and knees were shaking, and as much as I tried to keep it together I couldn't. I began sobbing openly, and when I tried to talk, I could only mutter the most pathetic excuses and apologies imaginable. "I don't want to be like this," I cried.

"Oh, you poor thing," she said in a tone of voice meant to mock me. "Do you wish you were a real man? Do you wish that when you play pretend dress up like a man that you could actually be one? With legs like you have, and that ass getting fucked in hotel rooms in the middle of the day, there isn't much chance of that."

I looked down at the floor silently and said nothing. There was a knock on the door and shortly afterwards it popped open.

"Diane? Are you busy?" asked the voice of Mr. Womble, the company president, from the doorway.

"No, Mr. Womble, come on in," Diane said. "Close the door behind you, please."

Mr. Womble came into the office and closed the door. He walked over towards me and looked me up and down for a moment before speaking.

"Is this the one who is helping us keep our contract with Masters' firm?" he asked Diane.

"Yes, this is Keith," Diane said.

"Keith? Are you supposed to be a guy?" he laughed. "With glitter on your legs and shorts like that?"

"I like to be called Kasey, sir."

"Masters said you liked to be called 'Erica,' which seems more appropriate to me."

"If you like, sir."

I couldn't believe how pathetic I sounded or how pathetic I was. It seemed unnatural to not say "sir" or "ma'am" after addressing someone. I didn't dare question or challenge anyone who put me down or mocked me. After seeing what a slut Erica really was, all of my resistance to becoming the submissive sissy I truly was melted away. I had fought it because of the hope I had of being with Erica, but since that no longer seemed possible, and since she had lied to me and misled me, and now I was no longer fighting.

"So, let me ask you again, Erica. Are you a man?"

"No sir, I'm not a man," I said through my tears.

"I've heard the rumors around the office, and I know you showed Masters a good time. And, I must admit, I'm a married man with children at home, but the idea of having you suck my cock is pretty appealing to me right now. What do you think about that?"

"I'll do whatever you want, sir. I would love to please you."

Mr. Womble started laughing. "What exactly do you do for us normally? I know you work down in customer service, but what exactly do you do down there?"

"I take commercial orders and respond to customer questions and complaints..."

"Taking orders?" he chuckled. "That sounds about right. I have an idea for a job you'd be better suited for. We have that warehouse out on the other side of the city where we keep our major inventory. We have two guys out there usually who oversee the place and move inventory as needed, that sort of thing."

"Yes sir, I know about the satellite warehouse."

"Good, because I want you to head out there now in your cute little shorts and see Tyrone and Jerry out there. Tell them I'm setting you up in the second floor office to take over the computer inventory and all that jazz. That will be your new job."

"Sir, are you sure? It seems to me they've always handled everything themselves."

"Are you questioning me, cocksucker? You are going to go out there and do this job for the company, and you are going to be available for special jobs when Diane calls you about them, and if the boys out there want any special services from you, I think you know what to do. Those boys have been working out there together for the past ten years and they need a little something special."

"Yes sir," I said, looking at the floor and watching my tears fall and hit the carpet.

"If I know those guys, they are going to tear that cute ass of yours up," Diane told me. "I've heard those two are hung like horses. Have you ever tasted dark meat, Keith?"

"No ma'am," I admitted.

"Oh, sugar, that is about to change in a big way," she said with a big smile. "Go clear out your desk and get out to the warehouse. Scoot!"

When I went to my desk and started clearing it out, putting all of my personal things in a box, everyone in the office stared at me. I could hear whispers and a couple of misplaced giggles, but other than that everyone just stared at me or pretended not to notice. I said nothing to them, as I tried to be quick about getting my things together, but as I stood in my short shorts with my shiny legs glistening, tears streaming down my face, it wasn't easy to make a quick and quiet exit.

When I got to my car, I beat my fists against the steering wheel, sobbing while I said, over and over, "This is out of control, this is out of control." I knew it was, but I was more upset that I liked it being out of control, that I liked being made to feel like a slut, and that I liked the ridicule.

Then I threw my head back against the headrest and groaned, "Erica, why? Why did you turn out to be just another person using me?"

I was disappointed and upset, but I couldn't really be angry with her. She wasn't doing anything any sluttier than I was. She might be, in Mr. Masters' words, "the queen of double penetration," but I had sucked off six men at a party and I had, just the night before, sucked off three men, including letting Tony's huge cock throat fuck me.

And then I had arranged to give another man head the following morning after making him breakfast.

I knew I couldn't afford to lose my job, and I drove out to the warehouse and tried to hold it together. When I got there, I wiped my tears away and picked up my box of belongings and walked in through the front door, trying to act as casual as possible.

Tyrone and Jerry were two very large, very strong, black men who ran the satellite warehouse. They basically ran their own show and I'd been out to the warehouse a couple of times for work related issues, but it was very rare to do so.

"Whoa, what's up," I heard Jerry say after I walked in.

"Mr. Womble sent me out here," I said, trying to sound businesslike. "He wants me to take over the computer inventory and tracking and all that."

"What the fuck for?" Jerry asked. "Ty and me have been handling that for the past five years."

Tyrone came into the front office of the warehouse wearing a tank top and basketball shorts. "Hey, its Kasey the cheerleader," he said after seeing me, "the skinny white faggot who got turned out on Halloween. What you doing out here in those hot pants? Looking for trouble?"

"Womble sent him out here to do the computer shit," Jerry told Tyrone. "That's some bullshit."

"We've handled everything for five fucking years out here," Tyrone spat. "Why the fuck they be sending your fairy ass down here to do shit already being handled?"

"I don't know. I just do what I'm told."

"Skinny ass white boy in hot pants wanna do what he told, eh?" Tyrone laughed and slapped Jerry on the back. "You thinking what I'm thinking, Jerry?"

"I'm getting some kind of idea."

"So, you trying to run one of us out of a job, hot pants?" Tyrone asked me as he circled around me muttering "mmhm" as he looked me up or down. "You trying to put one of us on the unemployment line?"

"No sir," I said while looking down at the floor. "Diane and Mr. Womble told me to come out here and take over the computer part of the warehouse."

"So, they think we can handle the grunt work but not the fancy computer shit? Are we supposed to be stupid or something? Maybe we can't even figure out how to turn the computer on? Maybe you think we're just a couple of dumbass—"

"Give him a break, Ty," Jerry said, pushing Tyrone away as he circled closer to me so that I could feel his breath on my face while he ranted at me.

"I'm really sorry," I said as I stood there with my knees shaking. I was terrified of these two men who were physically superior to me.

"Sorry?" spat Tyrone. "You sorry you out here trying to steal one of our jobs? Or maybe you think you can do both our jobs. I don't think your faggot ass could handle stacking a pallet or unloading a truck. You think you can do that?"

"Ms. Diane said to come out here and do the order entry or whatever on the computer system, but I won't be out here for the whole shift. She wants me to go out and entertain clients and things like that but she just doesn't want me around the office."

"Is that right?" Tyrone and Jerry both folded their arms in front of them and looked at me sideways.

I swallowed hard and said, "Mr. Womble said I should be available to both of you if you want any, um, special services from me."

"You mean like sucking our dicks?" asked Jerry.

I swallowed hard again. "Yes sir, I believe he meant special services like that. He said he appreciated the hard work you both do out here and sent me to show his appreciation. I don't think he meant for me to replace either of you."

"So, you our bitch now?"

"Yes sir, I'm your bitch now."

After that, I began taking orders from Jerry and Tyrone without question. I went out to the store and bought them soda and chips with my own money and even opened the bag of chips for them when told to. I washed their cars out in the parking lot and came back wet and covered in soap suds, to which they remarked "no chance of this bitch winning a wet t-shirt contest" and laughed at me.

It went on like that through Friday, when I asked them if I could go out to lunch. They didn't seem to care, but I always asked their permission before leaving or doing anything shy of going to the bathroom.

I'd always met Erica for lunch on Fridays at the mall. Even though I was in short shorts, which I always wore to the warehouse, and I had a pair of pants in the car along with other outfits in case I had to entertain Mr. Masters or another client, I didn't change before going to the mall. I didn't want to hide my legs. I spent a lot of time keeping them smooth, tanned and sexy. I wanted to show them off and I didn't want to be ashamed of who I was or what I did any longer.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 22



"I heard you got a new job," Erica's voice said as she came up behind me at our table by the water fountain. 

"Yeah, out at the warehouse," I said without turning to look at her.

"Look at those sexy shorts," she said as she walked around me to take the seat across from me. "Do you wear those to work now?"

"Yeah, I do. The guys all wear shorts out at the warehouse. It is much more casual."

"Do they all wear shorts like yours?" she asked with a wink.

"I don't want to talk about my shorts," I snapped. "Look, you said I should experiment with my fantasies about being with men and I have been going down on men for the past week, pretty much every damned day and I love it."

"Wow, okay then," she said calmly while looking around the food court to see if anyone was paying attention. "Look, I'm sorry I got so mad at you about you telling me Chris is a jerk or an asshole or whatever it was you called him."

"I'm sorry," I said, "I was out of line saying that."

"So," she said, changing the subject, "these men you've been hooking up with, where have you been meeting them?"

"I'd rather not talk about it, you know, they like to keep it on the down low."

"It must have be SO hot, um, the first time you went down on a man. Did you like it right away or did you kind of freak out at first?"

I cleared my throat loudly. "Okay, you are freaking me out with these questions. Look, I need to ask you about something and I need you to be honest with me. Do you and Chris ever, you know, involve other people in your, um, sex?"

Erica's eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "Why are you asking me that?" she said quietly.

"One of the men I met, well, he had a DVD of amateur porn and you were on it."

"Oh shit," Erica said as she started fiddling anxiously with the salt and pepper shakers on the table, dropping one on the floor in the process. "Look, Keith, I didn't want you to find out about that, or at least I didn't want you to find out about it like that..."

"Why would you tell me you couldn't make love with me because you don't cheat on Chris when you are having sex with all these other men?" I blurted out angrily.

Erica leaned across the table and whispered to me, "Please keep your voice down, baby. Look, I know this is hard to understand, but there are two kinds of sex. There is sex we have just for pleasure and there is sex that affects us down to the core, sex based on love and emotion rather than just physical pleasure. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"I don't know, really. I just know you are fucking other guys but I'm not allowed to touch you even though I'm in love with you."

"That is the reason, Keith. When Chris and I do these things with other people, it is something we both agreed on and he is always there with me. It is a kind of role play, a kind of exploration, a kind of, I don't know, a kind of something. I don't feel love for these other people. Think for a minute about these guys you are hooking up with. Do you feel the way you feel about me with them?"

"No," I said. "I don't feel anything for them at all, I just want their cock."

"We're more alike than you realize, baby. That is the same way I feel about these other men when Chris and I set something up with other couples or other men. I love really raunchy, nasty sex where I get used and treated like a whore. Is that who I am? Is that the Erica you see when you look in my eyes?"

"No, but I've seen you naked now, and I've seen you with men, and I can't get the images out of my head, so I don't know what to tell you."

"This," she said as she put her hand over her heart, "belongs to you."

"My heart belongs to you, too," I said as I choked up.

"The first time I broke up with Chris was because he kept talking about wanting to have a threesome with another woman. I told him I should be enough for him, but he kept talking about it. Then one night I came home and there was this other couple there. When I found out what he wanted and why they were there, I stormed out and told him I never wanted to see him again. You probably don't remember, but that was the first time we really talked. I came to you and told you he was cheating on me, but I wasn't being totally honest. Sure, he ended up banging this other woman while her husband watched, but I just told you he was cheating on me. I didn't tell you the rest."

"I vaguely remember that."

"It was the first time you told me you loved me," Erica said. "It broke my heart after that to see you with Lisa and see how miserable you were. Then I started talking to Chris again and somehow we started talking about this idea of switching partners with another couple and how it wasn't really that weird. I'd always been the kind of girl who didn't believe in one night stands or meaningless sex, but I've also always had a really high sex drive. Since Chris and I weren't technically together at that point, I agreed to go with him to meet this other couple at a hotel room. They were pretty normal, decent people, not any kind of weirdoes, and if you saw them in public you'd think they were just an average couple. We talked, had a few drinks, got to know each other, and well, it went down. And afterwards I realized I really liked it."

"I get that, or at least I think I do, but what about the movies? I mean, there are all these pervy guys out there seeing you like that and it just seems so, I don't know, awful."

"Well, Chris and I got back together after the thing with the other couple. And we did this sort of swinging thing for a while. It would always be another couple and we'd trade partners and it would be just meaningless sex and we'd go back to our partners at the end and everyone lived happily ever after. Then Chris wanted to go beyond that and I was with him. He talked about seeing me with two men at the same time and the idea really turned me on. He talked about seeing me with another woman, and even though I never thought about sex with another woman, the idea of doing it became a turn on. My whole opinion of things really turned around and I just went for it."

"But why film it? I get the whole sex thing, I really do, because it sounds just like how I feel about the men I hook up with."

"Last year when I broke up with Chris, it was because I found out he'd been secretly filming the sex we had with other people. I found the tapes and they were really crappy. He had hidden a camera in the room and the picture was blurry and the 'action' was so far away you could barely tell what was happening. I was upset he was filming us without his knowledge, and I told him to go fuck himself and left him, but later on I realized I was actually more upset that I looked like some kind of shriveled up shrew in the films because of the quality and the way it was filmed."

"You're too beautiful to ever look like a shriveled up shrew," I gushed, feeling my love for Erica growing again, this time with different fertilizer.

"You are always so sweet," she told me. "The thing is, after your accident and after you were in that coma, Chris was there for me. I was so upset, blaming myself for your accident, and he really came through for me. We got back together and I ended up bringing up my problem with the movies, that I was upset he did it without my knowledge and that I looked terrible in them. Then I told him I didn't have a problem making porno movies with him, but that I wanted them to be 'good' porno movies."

"Well, you looked gorgeous in the one I saw."

Erica blushed. "I mean, is it wrong I get off on being filmed like that or the idea that there are thousands of men watching my movies and sitting in the dark beating off while watching me like that? That is my biggest fantasy. Well, not my biggest, but pretty close."

"What's your biggest?" I asked.

"Honestly, I'd like to keep it a secret." She got up, kissed me on the cheek and said, "At least for now, my love."



Kasey's Confession Ch. 23



After Erica left me alone at the food court I sat quietly and nibbled daintily at my sandwich. I stared blankly at nothing in particular, but was jolted back to reality when Derek leaped out from somewhere inside the gate surrounding the food court's fountain and landed on the chair Erica had so recently occupied.

"Riddle me this?" Derek asked.

"What?"

"Riddle me this: If you are getting cock all the time and Erica is getting cock all the time, doesn't that make you two kind of the same?"

"That's not a riddle. That's just stupid."

Derek stood up, spun the chair around, and then sat down on it backwards. "No, hear me out, hear me out... you and your beloved Erica have the same interests. You connect on so many levels. Why are you upset that she's getting so much cock when you are getting just as much cock, if not more? Think about it, Kasey! You could spin this whole thing around and make a positive out of a negative."

"Well, I'm not exactly pissed about it. When I'm out there going down on any guy who lets me I can't exactly tell her she's wrong about what she does."

"Exactly, legged wonder! Exactly! Now, look, I've told you I've come to help. It wasn't easy getting here. I had to breach the space-time continuum in order to bring you the good news of... wait a minute, what good news did I come to bring? I can't remember."

"You didn't breach any space-time continuum. You work at a pretzel stand."

"No, I USED TO work at a pretzel stand," he said and turned around and looked until he spotted it. "That one over there, in fact," he said while pointing it out to me.

"Well, whatever, but don't make a bigger deal of it than it is."

"I did a little digging around for you, but then I realized that you had absolutely no use for a giant hole in the ground, so I put all the dirt back and put my time to better use by looking into your friend Marci's activities. You were right on the jackpot, Johnny on the spot, with that one. She's some kind of psychopath. The rabbit hole runs pretty deep, but I didn't let that bunny nonsense distract me. I walked around the rabbit hole and I went up to Marci's window and she was sitting there reading some kind of book. I think it might have been a Stephen King book, but not one of the good ones."

"What the hell is your point?"

"Your beloved Erica's man was there with her. That Chris fellow was standing in her kitchen with her, walking around and flapping his arms like a bird, yelling and screaming about this and that, and Marci doesn't even put her book down. She keeps reading this second tier Stephen King novel and looks up maybe once or twice, but never says anything to him, at least until the end. I imagine it might have been a particularly riveting chapter and she wanted to finish reading it before she dealt with Chris' ranting."

"What the fuck is the point of all this?"

"Think about it. Why is Chris over at Marci's place all upset and acting all worked up? And why doesn't she really give a shit? I mean, listen, after all his ranting and flapping around, she finishes her chapter of the book and casually puts a bookmark in it and places it carefully on the table. Then she stands up and walks over to the front door, opens it, and very calmly tells him to get out of her house. After he leaves, she comes back into the kitchen and what do you think she does?"

"I don't know. She went back to reading the book?"

"Aha! That's why you would THINK happened, but that isn't what REALLY HAPPENED. She goes into the living room and she puts a video on and sits down and watches it. Then she starts fingering herself while watching the video until she gets herself off, all moaning and panting and really into it."

"What the hell video was she watching? My Halloween party thing? One of Erica's movies?"

"None of the above! Wait for it... wait for it... wait a minute, I forgot what I was talking about. Remind me? I always get confused for several hours after I pass through the space-time continuum. I might need a glass of water."

"You were talking about the movie Marci was masturbating to."

"Oh, right, so I was. Well, now that you know all about that, I really need to get back to what I was doing earlier, although I am having some trouble remembering exactly what it was I was doing earlier. Do I have something on my face?"

I took a deep breath and asked him, speaking very slowly and distinctly, "What video was Marci watching after Chris left that she was getting off to?"

"Oh, it was a video of her in some leather get-up with thigh high boots and a whip and Chris was all crawling around licking her boots and shit like that. It was pretty comical."

"Are you serious?"

"I'm always serious," Derek said and made a very serious face, which quickly broke down into his usual rubbery clown face. "Well, not always, but usually I am. The message is in the medium. Or is the medium in the message? I don't know. I have my ways."

"Is everyone in this town fucking everyone else?"

"You see that girl over there with the guy in the Dodgers cap?" Derek asked as he pointed towards an attractive woman waiting on line for pizza.

"Yeah, what about her?"

"She hasn't done the sexy with anyone but that guy in over five years."

"Why are you telling me THAT?"

"You asked if everyone in this town was fucking everyone else. I was citing an example that disproved what you were trying to say."

"Okay, never mind," I sighed. "What is going on between Chris and Marci?"

"I dunno," Derek said with an animated shrug followed by an impromptu dance move that ended with him knocking his chair over. "Woops. All I know is he is real upset at her for some reason, that she doesn't give a flying fuck about why he's upset, that she has a movie of her in leather making Chris her bitch, and that she really likes Stephen King books."

"Does Erica appear in this movie she was watching?"

"Not that I saw. It was all Marci standing up and Chris licking her boots while she hit him with a whip or a riding crop or something like that. He was all naked and looked like he had a lot of gel or something in his hair. I mean, dude, his hair was SHINY. What's up with that? I mean, a guy has to take care of himself, right? Make himself presentable and all that jazz, but putting a ton of goop in your hair? That shit just ain't selling."

"Can you get me a copy of this tape or DVD or whatever it is?"

"You want to jack off to it?" Derek asked as he picked up the chair he'd knocked over.

"No, I don't want to jack off to it. I want to have it accidently fall into Erica's hands."

"Why?" Derek asked after sitting back down on the chair sideways. "Oh, wait, I get it! You want her to see that her boyfriend has been doing naughty things without her knowledge! Yes, right, yes, it is one thing to be making movies TOGETHER but it is another thing to be going out ON YOUR OWN and getting your fetish on. Well, unless, maybe, just maybe, she knows about all this boot licking stuff."

"I don't think she knows about it. It seems that Chris kind of led her along into this whole sex with other couples and other people and then talked her into the movie thing. She went along with it because she got into it, but I don't think she went along with him playing sex games with one of her friends on the side."

"Gotcha! I think we have a plan, although," Derek paused and stroked his chin. "See, the thing is, I don't know how to get that tape without having to ring the doorbell and spend some time with Marci, and she'll take one look at me and have me cleaning her toilet with my tongue five minutes after letting me into her place."

"Why don't you break into her place and just take it? She works nights and lives alone, how hard could it be?"

"What if she locks her doors?" asked Derek before making a series of disturbing, exaggerated kissing movements with his lips.

"You climbed up the side of my building to get on my balcony, so I figure you might know a few things about getting into someone's place when they're not home."

"Oh wait! Hark the herald angels sing! I have THIS!" Derek gushed before pulling a key out of his pocket and tossing it on the table.

"You have a key to her place? How did you get that?"

"It was under the front door mat. I guess even evil sorceresses can be predictable."

After Derek bounded off, I got up casually and walked towards the parking lot and my car, suddenly feeling very self-conscious of my bare legs being on display.

When I got back to the warehouse, there was a truck being unlocked. I walked in through the office door and saw Tyrone and Jerry hard at work unloading pallets off the truck with a forklift, and the driver of the truck was sitting in the office. He had his feet up on the desk while he read the newspaper.

"Hi," I said as he put the paper down to look at me. "Can I get you anything, sir?"

He was an older man, wearing the kind of flannel shirt one went hunting in, except the sleeves were cut off, showing off the multiple tattoos running down each arm. He had a dirty baseball cap on, well-worn jeans and cowboy boots.

"You must be Keith," he said while folding the newspaper and tossing it up on the desk. "Ain't you a sight."

"Yes sir."

"I have to say, you have some amazing legs. Word is you give amazing head, too. I ain't seen nothing like you before, and I've been to a lot of truck stops where... well, I'd be lying if I said I'd never had my knob gobbled by a faggot before, but not one who looked like you."

"Thank you, sir."

"So, how about sucking my dick while I wait for them boys to unload my truck?"

Tyrone and Jerry had not taken advantage of my overwhelming desire to please men sexually, but they had taken full advantage of my submissive nature, ordering me around and making me do menial and sometimes humiliating tasks. Jerry would eat an apple, throw the core on the ground, and tell me to pick it up, which I did without question. They sent me to fetch them lunch and make me pay for it, and earlier in the day Tyrone had told me to bring his sandwich back and tell the people at the restaurant that it "wasn't juicy enough." I did all these things without question, but the more submissive I became to them, the more I fantasized about being made to suck their cocks.

Ray, the truck driver, was more than willing to give me an opportunity to demonstrate my eagerness and skill at giving head and I was grateful for the opportunity to finally suck cock on the job.

I hadn't arranged to have cock for breakfast that morning, so Ray was going to be my first cock of the day. When he pulled out his cock, which was slightly above average with a very strong upward curve to it, it was like a boiled sausage, and for someone as cock-starved as I was, it looked delicious.

"I love sucking cock SO MUCH," I gushed as I went down on my knees in front of Ray. I could hardly contain my excitement as I put my hand around his cock and began licking his big balls like a starving animal that had just come upon a free meal in the wilderness.

"I can see that," smiled Ray. "You do know your place, don't you?"

"Yes sir," I replied between long licks of his balls before lifting them up and licking them from underneath. "Your balls are very yummy."

"I bet," said a voice from behind me.

It was a female voice, and I recognized it immediately. I pulled up from the work I was doing on Ray's balls and turned to look in its direction. Marci was standing there, having walked into the office without my seeing or hearing her enter, and she was watching me with a big smile on her face.

"Oh, don't stop on my account," she laughed. "You look like you were enjoying yourself."

"Leave me alone," I told her as tears started filling my eyes, "I don't want you in my life. You are a twisted, evil bitch!"

"Is that any way to talk to a lady?" Ray asked.

"She's not a lady," I said. "Go away, Marci!"

Jerry appeared in the doorway and asked, "What's the problem here?"

"Your cocksucker here is being very rude to the lady," Ray said.

"No, you don't understand..." I said, my voice trailing off into tears.

"Bitch ought to learn some manners," Jerry said.

"Please, just make her leave and I'll do anything you want, just make her leave," I sobbed.

"Fucking pathetic," snorted Jerry. "You ought to put the bitch over your knee, Ray."

"That sounds like a really good idea to me," Marci told them. She then turned to me and said, "Take off those fag boy shorts and get over his knee."

"No, please, I was being good," I sobbed, "I was doing what I was told. I just don't want her here, please, just make her leave."

"Take off those fucking fairy shorts and get over his knee, you stupid bitch," snarled Marci.

My hands were shaking as I stood up and started unbuttoning my shorts. While everyone told me to "hurry the fuck up" I unbuttoned all three of the buttons on the front of my shorts and pulled them down, wincing as I realized I was wearing hot pink thong panties.

"Oh for fuck sake," Marci laughed, "look at those fucking panties. What, are you shopping at Victoria's Secret or something now?"

"No, ma'am," I sobbed, "I ordered them online."

Ray was laughing and patting his leg and motioning for me to lie across it. He had pulled his pants back up and was holding some kind of short leather strap in his right hand.

"Please don't..." I sniveled.

"You're standing there in a pair of pink panties and crying," Marci said in a very demeaning tone. "You were just on your knees licking this truck driver's balls. Are we supposed to respect you? Get the fuck across his knee."

I stepped very slowly towards Ray and very carefully bent down and across his lap with my bare ass cheeks up in the air. I was already wincing, just from the thought of him spanking me, and he hadn't even started yet.

"What happened to your perfect, wonderful Erica?" Marci asked with a sarcastic tone. "Did poor widdle Keithy find out she was just as big of a slut as he is? Oh, I would have loved to see the look on your face when you saw that movie. I bet your heart broke into a million itty bitty pieces, didn't it?"

"Shut up—"

My outburst was cut short as Ray came down hard on my right ass cheek with the leather strap. He then hit the left cheek and then slapped each of them three more times in rapid succession. My head dropped down limply and my crying became more intense.

"You are going to be MY bitch," Marci told me. "I am going to bring out the most pathetic, submissive, sissy side of you and you are going to serve at my pleasure and do EVERYTHING I tell you to do."

When I didn't answer, Ray spanked me again, this time much harder than the first time.

"I want you to say that Erica is a slut and she makes you want to puke," Marci said before walking around to where my legs were sticking over Ray's lap. She pulled off my sneakers and socks and started laughing as she told Ray and Jerry, "Hot pink toenails and we're supposed to think he's a man?"

"No, she's not a slut," I said defiantly, through my tears.

Ray spanked me again, and Marci walked around towards my face and lit a cigarette. "Do you remember that summer we met? When we were dating and you convinced me to have sex with you out in the boathouse?"

"No," I cried, "I don't remember..."

"Well, you did, and I agreed. You told me you loved me, and said we were always going to be together, but then you met some other bitch, Deborah or something, and you ran off with her. Then you broke up with her and you came to me all broken hearted asking me if we could be friends because you needed someone to help you get over this bitch. And now I'm the asshole?"

"I don't remember..."

"For the longest time I hated you and resented you, but I loved you, so I became your friend and helped you deal with all the inane bitches you dated breaking up with you. For the longest time I had this hope that you would finally realize I was the one who had been there for you all along, but no, then you get interested in MY FRIEND Lisa and you are with her for three fucking years and then you want to leave her, but not for me, no, you want to leave her for MY OTHER FRIEND Erica. And now I'm the asshole?"

"I'm sorry," I said as Marci nodded and Ray spanked me again.

"I think my psychotic break happened when you told me you wanted to break up with Lisa so you could be with Erica. Here I am, always there for you, always supportive, the girl you once said you would love and be with forever, and you come TO ME for advice on how to dump one of my friends for another? I just lost it at that point. But then I find out you have this sick little fetish where you dress up in girlie clothes and show off your girlie legs, and the wheels started spinning. You listened to me, you came to me for advice, so I encouraged you to take it beyond that, to fulfill your destiny of becoming a cocksucking sissy. And then the plan started coming together."

"What is this, a fucking Bond movie?" Ray asked.

"Just spank the faggot and shut up," Marci snapped at him. "I always knew Erica had the potential to become a porn star," she told me. "With those long legs, her blonde hair, blue eyes, perfect little tits, and her libido... damn, she was boy crazy going back to the fourth grade. I guided her in that direction, I introduced her to Chris in the first place, and I knew he was into home movies and I knew he went to swingers' parties. She just needed someone to tap into her potential, just like you needed someone to tap into your potential, and now everything is so close to working out after YEARS of work, after all those nights I sat at your hospital bedside whispering into your ear, I am SO CLOSE to the final victory that I won't let it slip away for anything." 

Jerry shook his head and walked back to finish unloading the truck with Tyrone. Ray kept spanking me, more because he enjoyed it than because Marci wanted him to, and at her command he began hitting me harder while she walked back over to my bare feet and began tickling them.

The effect was a sensory overload. I was extremely ticklish, and with Ray spanking me hard and fast combined with Marci's intense tickling of both my feet at the same time, I began squirming and screaming, unable to concentrate on anything or even see straight.

Marci wrapped her arm around my ankles and held on tightly as she tickled my feet with her fingertips, fully aware of how extremely ticklish my feet were. Ray was strong, and held onto my shoulder with one hand as he reared back and slapped my ass cheeks repeatedly with the leather strap.

I finally broke free, kicking Marci off me and pulling free of Ray's grasp. I rolled onto the floor, physically and emotionally spent, unable to do anything other than shake and struggle to catch my breath.

"I think his eyes rolled back into his head," laughed Ray. "That was fucking awesome. He didn't know whether to shit or wind his watch."

Mr. Smith and Glenn walked in through the front door of the warehouse office. Mr. Smith walked over and stood over me, looking down and smiling as he saw me in the fetal position on the floor shaking and crying.

"Crawl over to Marci and lick her boots," Mr. Smith said. "Now!"

"No, please, leave me alone..."

"You don't want me to take over the job of spanking your sissy ass," spat Mr. Smith. "Crawl over to Marci and lick her boots. NOW!"

I crawled slowly towards Marci until my head was perched just above her boots. With tears running down my cheeks I whined and pleaded with Mr. Smith and Marci to just let me leave and go home.

"Lick her boots, you pathetic worm," Mr. Smith said without letting up. "You make me tell you again and I will spank you so hard you'll be seeing stars for a week."

I leaned down, stuck out my tongue and began licking the tops of Marci's boots. She then tilted her boot back on its heel and held the dirty bottom of her boot out towards my tongue.




Kasey's Confession Ch. 23



"Lick the bottom of my boot like a good bitch," Marci told me.

I looked up nervously at Mr. Smith, who had a short leather strap in his hand and was slapping it gently against his other hand.

"Please don't," I cried as I began licking the bottom of Marci's boot, tasting nothing but dirt and other assorted awful flavors.

"Keep licking," Marci told me, "Keep licking until I tell you to stop."

I kept licking, the tears coming down my face, until she reached down, unzipped her boot and pulled it off. Then she pushed her sweaty, bare foot in my face.

"Now lick my foot," she said.

Without pause, I did as she asked, glad that it was now her foot and not the bottom of her dirty boot. Her foot tasted a hundred times better by comparison.

"Jerk yourself off while you lick my foot," she said.

Mr. Smith reached down and tore my panties off and then pushed my right arm towards my crotch with his foot. "Do as the lady asked, sissy."

Holding myself up only by my left arm, I struggled with my balance and fell over. On my back I could see that Ray the truck driver had left and it was only Glenn, Mr. Smith and Marci with me in the office.

"Jerk it," Marci said and pushed her foot into my face. She forced her big toe into my mouth and told me, "Suck my toe like you suck cock."

I started sucking her toe slowly and reached down to my exposed genitals. My cock was hard as a rock and when I touched it my cock felt like it was ready to explode.

"You have such beautiful feet," I moaned as she pulled her toe out of my mouth and I shot my load onto the floor. "Oh gosh I love your feet so much..."

"Now, was that so hard?" Marci asked with a widening grin.

"No," I said quietly. "It felt so good to cum for you, ma'am."

"And now you are mine."