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Except from Book

By: KirkEdwards



Francine recounts some of her past.

"When I first met Hank it was in the city square by the fountains. I thought he was so handsome and noted his outgoing likable personality. He took notice of me smiling his fetching smile. Thinking I was a freak I was reluctant to be too forward until he approached me and any resistance I may have had was gone. Finding anyone like Hank to accept me was foolish I thought. Nevertheless I was so happy when he invited me to dinner that evening. I accepted of course and halfway through dinner he took hold of my hand telling me how lovely I was. It was clear he had romantic intentions but before it went further, I felt it best to tell him I might not be what I appeared to be. 

When he asked me what I meant I felt vulnerable and uncertain if I was brave enough to do so. Eventually, after squirming around in my seat, I told him my secret. I'll never forget it, his jaw dropped and he looked at me in disbelief. I didn't know if he thought I was kidding or not and waited for him to see my sincerity. When he saw I was serious, he threw his napkin down on his plate startling me before abruptly standing to leave I thought. Maybe he was calling my bluff and wanted to see if I would recant but when I just sat there looking at him, he seemed to melt slowly sitting back down in his chair as though he had been deflated. He looked around seeing no one could hear us and asked, 

"You mean you have a...?" 

I smiled seeing he had a hard time using the word as I shook my head 'yes' still not knowing if he believed me. I told him he should know right away before and if we got involved. I thought if he were to see me naked and rejected me; I would be devastated and humiliated. When he assured me he wouldn't reject for that and even said it was a bonus. This seemed too good to be true, if indeed he was being honest with me. I mean what kind of a man would want a woman with a penis? I've always had misgivings about my mixed sexuality and never assumed a woman's identity for sexual reasons; my decision was for my own sanity."

Looking at her I understood exactly what she meant. She continued,

"Sex was not a priority for me as I was content in just being who I was. As a result I only had sex a few times before I met Hank and it was just that; sex. Once was when I was 18 at a party; the young man I was with thought I was a girl. He was older than me and very handsome. There was drinking and some pot-smoking and other couples were making out. We were sitting in the corner of the room, leaning against the wall. The lights were off and the only light came from some candles. He had been drinking and smoking and was in and out of consciousness occasionally smiling broadly as it was clear he felt no pain. 

I couldn't help looking at the bulge between his legs. I had fantasized numerous times about having a man in my mouth. I looked up and saw that everyone was making out and boldly reached over to touch him on the thigh. I felt guilty knowing he was helpless but I knew what I wanted. When I reached up and fondled him I could tell he wasn't wearing underpants. 

I continued to run my hand over him before tightening my grip and squeezing him. He moaned as he got very hard which was exciting. Again I looked around the room as though I was doing something wrong and didn't want to be discovered. I put my hand on his zipper and slowly pulled it down getting excited as though I was a bank-robber about to pull off a heist. Looking at his face I saw him smiling though his eyes were still closed. Seeing he was enjoying the contact I unbuttoned the top of his pants spreading the two flaps apart so I could see him. I guess I did things in steps. Once seeing him, I wanted to take him in my hand and feel him, which I did of course. Next I wanted to kiss him so that I could feel how it would feel against my lips, which was incredibly exciting for me causing my own stirrings between my legs. 

Looking around again and seeing everyone preoccupied I leaned down kissing him causing yet another moan from him. His cock had a different more exciting reaction all its own; it twitched with its' excitement. I remember thinking that the half-conscious guy leaning against the wall was like a third party since it felt like it was just me and a hard beautiful cock wanting and liking the attention I was giving it. When I licked it, it let me know it liked that too with its sudden movement. When I put the end in my mouth feeling the wonderful hard end; I felt the little opening with my tongue and was treated with a delicious preview taste of what I expected was inside.

Having seen it, touched it and now tasted it, I now wanted to feel how it would feel to have it ejaculate in my mouth. The excitement of all these consecutive events made me incredibly hard. It didn't take long for him to render the warm contents into my mouth and it was everything I had hoped or dreamed it could be; maybe more even. I was so aroused and seeing him drop off into a deep sleep I excitedly went into the bathroom and masturbated as I trembled from the thrill of what I had just done.

My second experience came after one night when my sister Edith took me out to celebrate my 19th birthday. We were having dinner in the city and she was talking about her husband and what they had done together sexually. We were drinking wine; too much I fear and I confided to her what I did at that party when she smiled and said: "Olalla" meaning she thought it was sexy and nice too. I told her I wished I knew someone who would do it to me so I knew how it felt. She told me she heard about a place in the city having what they called "glory-holes" explaining what they were and asked if I would like to try it.

'I'll even go with you for moral support if you want,' she laughed. 

I told her I wasn't sure I had the nerve when she said I was being silly saying, 

'Its sex between consenting adults intended to be pleasurable.' 

She said it was mostly gay males, some older women and a few younger girls goaded into going for initiations and taking dares from other girls who have done it. 

'There are a lot of people that actually crave it, both doing it and having it done to them. As you know from your experience it was good wasn't it,' she asked and I nodded my head admittedly with some degree of embarrassment. She then said,

'So think of it as being nice to some unknown person that enjoys it, rather than just being for your own pleasure.'

The idea excited me as I found myself hardening; I blushed wiggling around in my seat letting her know how I felt with my body language. The conversation fell silent until she smiled telling me to drink up. When the waiter came she paid the tab. I wondered how she knew where the place was and we took a taxi to within a few blocks noting the prostitutes and what appeared to be gay men and a few older women. Once outside the place I was beginning to have second-thoughts about it but realized it was more of an excitement I was feeling than a fear. 

The idea of what we were doing was appealing to me but I couldn't stop feeling embarrassed since I was with my sister. I knew I wanted to suck someone off before having it done to me, since the last time was really exciting. I was too shy to tell her this and instead told her I was having second-thoughts about what we were doing asking instead if we could call it a night. 

It was a lie of course since I returned the next day when I was alone and went to the section I wanted. It was as exciting the second time and afterwards I entered the section for receiving one. The person doing me was a male since he called out if anyone was there when I entered. I was so aroused; I just stepped up to the hole and placed my cock through it. He was good and obviously enjoyed the act as well. I climaxed quickly marveling at how wonderful a wet, warm and willing mouth could feel."

Francine tells me about her and Hank. 

"I was elated when Hank didn't seem to mind about who I was. After dinner he asked what I'd like to do; there was an acceptance in his suggestion which endeared him to me. I told him it would be nice if we went to the beach for a walk, to watch the sunset, which we did. I still didn't know if he believed me or not but I felt it was up to me to prove it to him. 

When we walked the beach he held my hand. Strange how this simple gesture made my heart take wing. Anything and everything he did romantically after I told him I was born a male seemed to have an impact on me when I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I thought there weren't too many men willing or able to accept me as I was, since I considered myself deformed in some way and then of course it made me question what kind of a man he was. Was he deep-down homosexual, or was he heterosexual? I had a hard time resolving this and letting it go, even to this day, I assume he is bi-sexual; which of course means I can satisfy both his desires making our relationship work. The only dilemma left for me was the desire to be loved and cherished as a woman and I knew this was my problem and not his to come to terms with.

When the sun was half engulfed by the ocean and was about to dip below the horizon, we sat down watching it fade from view. He put his arm around me and pulled me close to him as my head rested on his shoulder. When the sun disappeared, he turned my face to his and gave me a very loving kiss which was both exciting and arousing. When we stood I asked him if he doubted what I told him earlier. He seemed confused so I went into his arms and pressed my hardness against him to remove any possible doubt he may have had. There was a pause as I pushed and rubbed against him in hope of a response. He didn't have to say a word as I felt his arousal as well. He said I was 'incredible' and never thought it was possible for him to find someone like me. 

I understood his surprise and knew our future hung in the balance. I felt relieved in knowing he accepted me and we sat down again watching the fading light in the sky. Almost magically the day's heat was blown away with wisps of cool air from the ocean.  

I asked him to tell me more about his past and what kind of sexual experiences and relationships he had. For all I knew, he could've been married since the line of work he was in was conducive to having many lovers and even wives if he chose such a life.  

I needed to know more since from the start I sensed there was something worthwhile between us."