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Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 01

By: Sarkopheros



Sarkopheros Says: 

Okay, this one needs a fairly extensive foreword, because I've never written anything like it before. Not that reading this is necessary. Skip over it if you want. 

If you haven't read my smut before, oh boy. Wow. My erotica is largely based on gonzo insanity. Ludicrous proportions, cum inflation, hyper cocks, cervical penetration, stomach bulging, and a slough of other things. 

Jae's stories are even worse about it than Brod's. If you haven't read one of his stories, you might not know what to expect. What you need to know is that this entire universe operates based on mescaline, hentai physics, and the assumption that people are made of latex. 

In this one, I've decided to make Jae a Jedi, because I've been playing SWTOR a lot and had the idea for this story. It seemed funny, so I sat down and wrote it. It's a story about how Jae is the worst Jedi ever. Jedi Jae is several times more hung than normal Jae. Explanation is at the end. 

People more ingrained in the Star Wars canon than I will likely find canonical errors. My own knowledge of the EU isn't terribly huge, so most of what I know is from the game, and even then it's incomplete. In some cases, I've even ignored facts I know about the canon for the sake of comedy. So let's just pretend that my unintentional mistakes were intentional and caused by me trying (poorly) to be funny, shall we? However, I am very much open to constructive criticism, and if you think I made a mistake unintentionally, feel free to point it out. 

Because names in SW are often goofy or sound completely made-up, I've done the same thing with names here. So that's why the names are odd. Except for Shan, any resemblance to the name of a canon or other character/person is coincidental. 

On with the story. 

*** 

The massive doors to the council chamber opened, and in he came ... or a part of him came, anyway. 

Grand Master Shan sighed in exasperation. She began reciting the same words she'd said innumerable times before. There is no emotion, there is peace.... 

The source of her current dismay was the gargantuan phallus waggling its way into the chamber. The phallus was a golden, honeyed tan in coloration, and was well over two meters long. Under it, nearly sweeping the floor, swung a pair of testicles each of which was a good meter in breadth. 

Oh, and the genitals were also attached to a man. A male human who carried his ludicrous endowment slung over his shoulder like a sack of tubers. While he wore boots, a Jedi's ... robe? And a utility belt complete with a pair of lightsabers, that was all he was wearing. 

Just as Republic law allowed aliens to wear clothing adapted to their physiology or culture without persecution, Jae wore clothing adapted to his. Thus, it was illegal to force some of the dignity he lacked onto him. 

Predictably, he walked over to Satele and flopped his cock onto the table next to her. WHUMP. The entire table shuddered. 

"Sup, Master Shan," he said, smiling genially at her. 

Shan collected her thoughts and facepalmed. Mentally, at least. Jedi Grand Masters must always keep composure, after all! Despite the fact that a cock bigger than she was had just been plopped onto her table. 

"Jae, I called you here ... is that a bathrobe?" 

Jae looked down. "Yeah, I'm sorry. All my robes need to be cleaned, and I didn't have a chance to go to the Jedi store. They're all crusted with dry—" 

"I'm sure you have a good reason," interrupted the Grand Master. "I called you here to discuss a mission we need you to undertake," she said. At least his bathrobe wasn't encrusted with the DNA of assorted species as his actual Jedi robes surely were. It was, honestly, a wonder his weapons were even functional with all the fluid they got exposed to. 

The knight nodded. "I figured something was going on if you were allowing me back in the council chamber." 

No one would ever forget that day. Shan nodded and said, "We received a list of the crew on board an Imperial dreadnought. Usually, they aren't very important." 

Jae nodded. "Okay." 

"But this one is strange because the crew is all female. We believe it may be related to intel we received concerning a possible Imperial measure to increase the birth rate of Force users." 

"So you want me to go check it out?" 

"Yes, because the last thing we need is more Sith. There are also rumors that the ship is transporting some experimental droids." Satele looked up at him. "Find out what is going on with that ship, Jae." 

"I can do that," he said. "But first, don't you think I should—" 

Shan narrowed her eyes. "Do not hold another 'special training class' for the female padawans, Jae!" 

Jae sighed and bowed his head. "I'll take care of your dreadnought, Master Shan, you'll see. I'll make you proud." 

She stood and put her hand on his shoulder. The one that he hadn't slung his cock over. On the plus side, today he didn't reek like a brothel on Nar Shaddaa. "May the Force be with you, Jae." 

Jae bowed back, pulled his obscenity off the table, and left. 

*** 

Four black-armored Imperial troopers stood near the docking port. The tallest one turned her helmet over in her hands. Her brown hair was up in a neat bun, which would have been squashed had she been wearing her helmet, and clearly, fashionable hair was far more important than head-protection. "Why do our helmets look like buckets?" 

"Everybody's wondering the same thing, Kalice," answered the short blonde, whose nametag said Tamia. 

"I wonder if they came from a bucket factory?" asked Kalice. 

A redhead was nearby. Her armor was uniquely customized—it completely lacked anything resembling a chestplate. The empire was very willing to spend billions of credits building hundred-meter statues of sith and building kilometers-long dreadnoughts that no one asked for. It was also quite happy to bankroll one particular sith's idea for a droid that shot pizzas out of its chest. But buying proper armor for the infantry was just so provincial. 

Instead of chest armor, which would have never fit over her gargantuan tits, she'd just stuck each fat mammary into a helmet. One of the helmets had "Dessa" scrawled across it with silver marker. She said, "Maybe the helmets look like buckets so we can take bail out of the ship if it sinks." 

Kalice shook her head. "How would ... huh?" 

The fourth girl, who had tan skin and jet-black hair, spoke up. "Even if the ship crashed in an ocean, how would you bail all that water out?" 

"Oh yeah, can you think of a better way, Weni?" 

KLANG. KLANG. There was a knock on the hatch. All of them turned towards it. 

"Who is that?" asked Kalice. 

Tamia shrugged. "How the hell should I know? Go open it and find out." 

Kalice walked over and keyed open the door. The pad chirped and it swung out with a groan. She was greeted by—WHUMP. Something massive and heavy fell on top of her, pinning her down, fleshy and hot, heavy as a hutt! 

Her partner stood dumbfounded as her friend flailed under a dewback-sized cock. It was attached to a Jedi. Or, at least, a muscular guy wearing a bathrobe and not much else. The robe exposed a set of solid abs and a flat, broad chest. 

The guard on the ground continued to writhe, trying to wrestle the organ off of her, but was plainly too heavy. 

Tamia asked, "Who are you supposed to be?" 

Jae said, "I'm a Jedi." 

Tamia jabbed her finger at his "uniform." "No you're not, that's just a bathrobe!" 

Weni held her helmet up and began talking into it. "We need backup near starboard docking port 4C. A hobo with a huge dick just boarded the ship." 

Jae lifted the sides of the bathrobe and said, "Check out these lightsabers, girl." He lifted his arms, and the sabers floated into the air on either side of him, humming to life, red-orange blades burning bright. "Yeah, if I'm not a Jedi, explain that." 

"Okay, fine, you're a damn Jedi, whoop-dee-ding-dong," said Tamia. "Why are you on my ship wearing a bathrobe? That is not appropriate attire." 

The Jedi's lightsabers turned off, and he returned them to his belt. "All my Jedi robes are getting cleaned. Anyway, our uniforms all look like bathrobes anyway, just brown," he said. 

"Granted," said Tamia, looking down at Kalice as she kept struggling with the weight of the titanic organ. She grabbed handfuls of its foreskin and tried to roll it off of her. 

Weni looked at him and said, "I didn't know the Republic was genetically engineering weapons of mass destruction." She put her blaster down and walking to the head of his cock. It looked wider than her shoulders. She bent over and hefted the cock's glans with both hands. Jae raised his own, and the ridiculous organ lifted off the poor trooper. 

Kalice clawed away from it and gasped for air. "Aaaauuugh! What the hell?!" she yelled, then sputtered and began licking her lips. "I can taste it!" she complained at the Jedi and his monstrosity. "Ooh. I can taste it..." She continued licking her lips. 

Dessa let out an excited chirp and jumped up onto the base of the Jedi's ludicrous organ, helmets bobbing as she sat. "I've never met a real Jedi before!" She reached up and touched his face. "You seem cooler than they said!" 

"Sup, girl? I'm Jae. You're cute," he said, smiling and shaking her hand. "What's up with these helmets?" 

"Normal armor won't fit!" she whined. "Wow, are all Jedi as big as you?" 

"Only me," Jae said. 

"How did you get here?" 

"They shot me out of a torpedo tube," he answered. 

"Yeah, right. Holy shit, you're not even hard," observed Kalice. The three other women were all standing near the massive glans as a melon-sized glob of precum rolled out of its mouth. 

"You could fix that, girl," suggested the Jedi. His massive organ rose up like a serpent. The women gasped and moved backward. 

"What the hell kind of cock is that?!" yelled Tamia. "How are you human?!" 

Jae shrugged. "It's a Jae cock. I'm human, just better endowed, girl. Plus, I can use the Force to do cool stuff." As he peered past Dessa, his cock's belly swelled and a broad jet of precum blasted from its mouth. SPLLLRSSCCHH! Steaming-hot slime saturated the ladies. It coated their armor thickly, dripping down their plating and into a pool under them. 

Kalice wiped a handful of slime from her face. Tamia began licking at it. 

"Mmmhh," she hummed. "This isn't as nasty as I thought." 

A hot, heady smell began to radiate from that hot puddle of pre, literally steaming in the cool interior of the ship. The ladies began to lick their lips as it invaded their nostrils—the strong, sordid smell of virility. 

Gloorp. Grrmmbbbll. Jae's balls began to rumble and sag lower as they swelled. "Come on, you gotta be curious to see me hard," he said to the women present. 

He looked up. Jae didn't understand why capital ships were so capacious inside. The ceiling was a good four or five stories above him. Wasn't space at a premium on board a space vessel? Regardless, the Jedi predicted that all this empty space would come in handy. 

But he wasn't looking to see how high the ceiling was—he was looking for what was on the ceiling. 

"Well, I guess it couldn't hurt. But we're going to have to arrest you, Jedi scum," said Kalice. 

He shrugged at her. "Okay, but later." There it was. Set into the bulkhead, not the ceiling. An intake for the ship's ventilation system. 

First, Tamia began to undo her cuirass. Then, Kalice began to fiddle with her boots. The troopers began to strip down, exposing their toned bodies. 

Dessa groaned and whined as she tried to take the helmets off of her massive tits. "Ugh, these things are too small!" she complained. 

"It's almost as if helmets weren't meant to be worn on your bloody tits," suggested Tamia. 

"Let me help," said Jae. He gestured. POP! POP! The helmets flew away and— FLUMP. "Holy shit." Those tits were about twice the size of the helmets, each one like a watermelon! Fat nipples as big as his thumbs sprung free. "How the fuck did you put your tits in there? Are you a wizard?" he asked. 

Dessa giggled. "No, I'm from Dromund Kaas!" 

Jae felt cold hardness as his balls swelled heavily enough to touch the floor. He put a hand on Dessa's back and lifted his leg. The gigantic flesh-melons slipped back behind him. 

The three women knelt by his glans and began to fondle it. Tamia slipped her hands under the foreskin and licked her lips as pints of hot semen began to leak out. But she stared in confusion as she pulled out a bright orange object which turned out to be a bikini. 

Likewise, the other two began to pull out assorted undergarments with lewd squishing. Squilsch. Squilsch-squelsch. Their arms became coated with white seed, and they began to look more and more confused. 

"Yeah, sorry about that," apologized Jae. 

"I'd be more surprised if those things weren't there!" chirped Dessa, bouncing happily on his cock as she peeled off more and more armor. "Where else would you keep them?" 

"Good point," Jae chuckled and began to help her with the task, rubbing his hands over her tits. "Smooth like a neutron star," he commented. 

At the front of his cock, Tamia began to massage and knead the thick, fleshy lobes around the cock's mouth. The other two women began to rub against it, their delicate fingers tracing up the backside of the glans as they began to lick. The monstrous organ responded by beginning to grow, leg-thick veins bloating along its surface as the head pushed forward, creeping centimeter by centimeter across the plating. 

Fresh, boiling-hot precum poured by the liter from the tip and into their waiting mouths. The moaning women began to slather handfuls of the slickness all over the dome of the organ as it slithered forward. 

CHRRRRRMBBBLL. The gigantic testes swelled and rippled as sperm multiplied within. The Jedi let out a growl and sat back against his growing nuts. His coarse hands wrapped under Dessa's ass and he picked her up as marbles of white sweetness began to roll down her gigantic tits. His lips wrapped around one of those fat nipples. Hot milk filled his mouth and rolled down his throat as he drank from her, the other tit pouring the whiteness over his chest and soaking into his robe. 

His ludicrous cock pushed forward across the cool tiles. His nuts rose behind him, each now big enough for an astromech droid to fit comfortably inside. The ladies kept having to scoot and step back as the phallus grew. 

"Holy shit, you can stop, already!" yelled Tamia. 

Kalice looked up the length of his cock, like a honey-tan highway stretching out toward the Jedi's chiseled abs. It was over four meters and still growing! And that smell! His cock sprayed hot liters of slime all over them once more, waggling its head back and forth. 

The fluid rolled down their bodies. The heat seemed to collect between their legs. Each of them grew more wet, more needy, mounds plumping with arousal. 

Jae sighed as he smelled them. It was just such a delicious scent. 

There was a clomp-clomp-clomp! Dozens of troopers descended upon them from halls on either side of the room. Armor rattled, weapons came out. All those blasters were aimed right at him. 

"Halt, stop—what...?" 

"Um." 

The lady-troopers all stared for a long moment at the scene before them. 

"Is that a Jedi?" 

"No, that's a hobo. Who else walks around in only a bathrobe?" 

"I don't think he can wear pants even if he wanted to." 

Tamia, Kalice, and Weni looked around at their comrades. Dessa, of course, was giggling like mad as the Jedi sucked down her milk. He pulled his lips away from her gigantic tit and looked around the room, more of the trooper's milk pouring down his body. 

"I'm flattered by the welcoming committee, ladies," he said. 

"We need help!" cried Weni. 

"Yeah, you idiots, don't just stand there, take your clothes off!" yelled Tamia. 

His cock was still partially soft ... enough for him to curve its glans to one side, then the other. GLOOOOOORCH! A bright arc of clear, boiling-hot slime blasted all over the gathered audience. Bath-tubs worth of fluid drenched their armor. Some of the women fell back. Some shielded themselves. TSEW! TSEW! Bright bolts lanced toward him from a few of those blasters. Jae's lightsabers were already out, buzzing, deflecting the blasts away from everyone, blasting smoking holes into the bulkheads. 

A metallic voice came from one of them. "By the Force, can you smell that?!" 

"Oh god, it's in my uniform!" 

A woman collapsed. "Oh, it's so hot!" 

One by one, helmets began to pop off. Jae smiled. Who needs the mind trick, anyway? he mused. 

Piles of black armor grew. Bodies were exposed. Military-honed women began to move toward him. Precum kept gushing from his cock in an arc, clear fluid rolling out over the deck's plating. The ladies walked through the pool towards him. 

Many of them knelt on either side of his cock. They scooped up handfuls of the steaming pre and slathered it all over themselves. Messy hands rubbed over glistening flesh. Soft breasts were shining. Fingers slipped between freshly-coated thighs. Women used their mouths to gather up more of the precious fluid. They groped and oiled each other. Moans echoed in the room as they wrestled each other into the pool, clear ropes sticking them together. 

Some used it to lube up his cock, massaging and polishing his flesh with the pre as if it were fine oil. The Jedi let out a pleased groan. Entire bodies were used to oil his member, women clambering up its sides and swarming over its titanic length. The troopers climbed up on top of his pulsing organ and began to grind against it. Finally, he felt himself reach his full size. 

"This thing is like a space worm!" moaned one of the women. Six meters of gargantuan cock, the fattest part looking to be maybe one and a half across. So fat the women couldn't get their arms around it. So long than three or four of them end to end may have equaled its length. So massive it would take dozens of them just to move it. 

His balls gurgled as they grew behind him, each one jiggling as its height surpassed his own. Some of the ladies were kind enough to rub, slip, and slide against his balls, kissing and licking. He could feel it as some of the Imperials climbed up on top. They grabbed handfuls of the thick, loose flesh and clambered upon them. It was difficult with how slippery the fluids were, but they managed. 

The slick hoards were grinding and rubbing against his absurd manhood, groaning and licking and kneading. His precum rolled over their feet, the huge, metallic room filling with that scent. His balls sent vibrations through the floor as they grew behind him, radiating heat that warmed the whole compartment. His organ's veins were of a proper size for its bulk, meaning they rivaled the thighs and waists of the women in thickness. They provided handholds and leverage for ladies to climb atop his organ. Two of them were clinging to the glans, pumping their fists in and out of its mouth to stimulate it into releasing more of that sweet slime. 

GRRMMBBBLL. GRRNNOOONGH! A metallic groan as his balls pushed aside a couple of the huge metal containers sitting in the room. Dessa cooed and ground her hips against his cock, against one of the veins pumping under her. Her milk spilled all over his body as he sucked a mouthful of tit-flesh, covering him in white-hot sweetness that wasn't his own. 


Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 01



Their legs and arms, their breasts and bellies, their breath and lips, it all stimulated his fleshy behemoth. The precum in the room surpassed ankle depth. Some of it was beginning to flow into the air intakes on the walls. The steaming cloud of hot cock-musk was beginning to circulate through the ship. 

He looked up and grinned. "Now, who wants to get fucked first?" He looked at Kalice. "You know, I never did make it up to you. I almost smothered you with my dick, girl." 

Kalice smacked her lips, licking precum from her fingers. 

At some point during the fray, she'd ended up standing near the glans, pumping her arm in and out of it. The organ was so massive, so powerful, and it gave off such huge amounts of heat that she was sweating profusely. She looked at its owner and said, "Show me how a Jedi fucks, scumdog." 

Jae lifted his hands, summoning the Force for what was clearly a very important purpose. Because what higher calling could there be than using it to bang your enemy? 

Kalice felt an invisible grip lifting her body into the air. She yelped. Her neat bun had fallen into sloppy disarray, soaked through with liquid, wet strands draping about her head. The Jedi spread her legs, bending her over in mid-air. The heat that warmed her needy, dripping entrance spoke of his phallic might. In fact, Kalice was thinking, That is a mighty phallus. Wait... 

"Oh my god, my name rhyme with phallus!" Then she rocketed through the air with stomach-turning force. She slammed cunt-first into the cock's head. She shrieked. "Waaaaghh!" 

That massive glans wrenched her cunt open in a second, stretched her out to cartoonish degree, penetrated her womb in a blink. Her belly bulged out, and she found herself slipping back, back, stretching like latex over that ludicrous organ. Her insides were on fire, and her mind completely blanked. Her eyes closed. Her legs flailed. Her toes curled. Her hands made fists. A scream tore from her throat. Hot juices sprayed out around the Jedi's cock, bathing that organ's incredible diameter, her whole body rippling as it pushed her insides aside. SKLLRRT! SKLLRRT! 

Her belly stretched out, under her chest, reaching in front of her, the woman now turned into a cinnamon-colored condom, her flesh stretching like latex. It didn't end, she just kept sliding back, back, more and more cock forced into her. Hundreds, then thousands of kilos of Jedi cuntbuster were forced into her poor little body, and the sensation was every as huge as the thing inside her. Everything was on fire. Hot, Imperial nectar mixed with precum, showering the crowded bodies. 

Jae licked his teeth, looking past Dessa's shoulder as he pulled Kalice back over his cock like a sock over his foot. Of course, this meant the poor women surrounding his cock were cut off from directly touching its surface. The woman's motion sent up a spray of precum. All the women around them began rubbing his cock through her flesh, every vein and contour outlined under her skin. 

Kalice felt her ass slam into Dessa's, her cheek against her own stomach. Then, she began to slide up and down his length, as if on a roller coaster. She careened forward, then got yanked backwards, meter after meter of gargantuan organ slamming her over and over. There was no describing this fucking. 

"Your balls are getting huge!" cooed Dessa, reaching up behind Jae to rub her hands over his nuts. In the process, she engulfed his head in her heavy bust. He couldn't see a thing. 

But he didn't need to see to continue using Kalice like a fleshlight. And through the Force, he could feel her raw ecstasy, the arousal and pleasure of all around himm and it helped feed the rampant replication of his seed. 

Those nuts rose up, breaching the three-meter mark in height, more than that in width—their sheer mass meant they were more oval than spherical in shape. They churned and rumbled menacingly. 

SCHLOOORK-SCHLIIIICK. SCHLOOORK-SCHLIIIICK. "Hawaaaaugh!" screamed Kalice, her inside quaking as her orgasm refused to end. The Jedi manhandled her without even looking. With how fast she slipped up and down his gargantuan rod, it was amazing she was aware of anything. 

Jae, of course, was only partially paying attention to her, because Dessa had gone back to feeding him pint after pint of milk. She was very insistent about it, saying, "You need to be nice and strong so you can fuck everyone! It wouldn't be fair if you didn't!" 

Jae tried to speak, but she just shoved her breast into his face hard enough for it to engulf it. He couldn't see past all that tit-flesh. 

"You should cum quick so we can all go!" said the perky little redhead. 

Finally, Jae wrestled her milk-spewing tit out of his face so he could speak without nipples interrupting him. "Good idea, girl, but don't worry, I got enough cock for this whole ship, okay?" 

"Aww! You're not so bad, you're the nicest Jedi I've ever met!" chirped the happy redhead. 

"Didn't you say I was the onl—GLLRGLL!" Once again, a fat nipple interrupted him with pints of hot milk. 

His balls were now towering high above as nude, slick bodies rubbed and moaned against them. They began to rumble and quake. GRRRMMBBBBLLLLLLL. The deck plates began to shake. Jae pulled Kalice back against his body, the slime causing her to slip underneath Dessa's ass. 

GLRRSSSCHH. A gushing was audible deep in his balls. It would be several seconds before anyone realized what it was. The belly of his cock bloated outward. A solid column of steaming, gooey liquid distended its throat and forced a groan from Jae's. A raging tsunami of virility boiled over... 

A dark-skinned girl and a blonde rubbed Jae's glans, standing at its tip. They groaned and cooed and licked and lapped at that thing right through Kalice's flesh. Sure, they heard the rumbling, but who heard an earthquake and thought, "Golly, I bet this man is about to ejaculate!" 

BLOOOOORCH. A column of jizz as wide as them blasted the insides of Kalice's womb. 

Jae let out a long roar of pleasure, "AAAUGH! Fuck the Empire!" 

Bathtubs worth of jizz exploded inside Kalice, her shriek piercing the room and echoing off of its walls. "Aaauuuuugh! Aaiiiieee! Fuuuuuck!" Her legs flailed like mad as her toes curled. 

And the hapless girls standing in front of his cock when it went off? Kalice's belly abruptly expanded with such force they went flying into the air, trailing shining arcs of precum. 

"Fuck!" cried the blonde as she spun away, tumbling end over end as she landed in a laundry cart being pushed by a droid. 

The dark-skinned girl shrieked as she plunged head-first into a pile of clean clothing being pushed by another droid. "How convenient the laundry schedule is," she mused. 

The droid sighed in exasperation. "I will have you know, ma'am, that genetic fluid is not an optimal detergent. This entire batch must be washed again!" 

SPLOOOOORT. Kalice shrieked as her belly grew and grew, spreading to the sides and underneath her, lifting her up as the space around Jae's cock filled up. Her growing stomach engulfed the women on either side, rolling over them and pinning them down under a wall of sweaty-slimy skin. 

GLUUUUURCH. That raging tsunami continued. SPLUUURT, SPLUUURT, SPLUUURT. Every epic wad took several long seconds just to leave the cock. And every wad pushed her a little further towards the tip. 

Kalice collapsed, her mind apparently finding a dream to be the safest place to take refuge in the face of this stimulatory hurricane. 

Jae moaned into Dessa's tits as Kalice crept further along, her belly allowing the women underneath to breathe once more. They wasted no time in moaning and lapping at the gallons of cum spraying out around his cock, head-sized blobs of thick seed exploding against their bodies and painting them white. 

Another centimeter, another, and Kalice's lips were almost disengaged from the glans, clinging on by the rear edge. GLOOOOOOORCH! 

And away she went. 

The sheer force of all that semen sent her on a very short flight, her body flying about half a meter off the ground and a few meters away. Her massive weight kept her from going far. A hot jet of spunk erupted from her body. Her belly was a great balloon of skin that lifted her several meters high. A white arc spewed high into the air, the trooper's gaping cunt becoming a fountain. 

But Jae wasn't done. 

SPLOOOORCH. Thousands and thousands of liters of thick whiteness blasted across the compartment, painting the far wall white. Jae leaned back against his towering, still-swelling nuts as even Dessa was distracted by his orgasm. She turned around watched in amazement. Jae's cock impossibly lifted itself up from the deck, moving slightly at its base, sweeping the room. 

All the women were buried in steaming yogurt-thick jizz that ran over them and covered the floor. The spunk rolled down the walls, dripped from the ceiling, erupted from his cock . 

All this screaming and commotion, of course, drew reinforcements after several minutes. They were hit by the deluge as sperm rolled across the floor. A seminal tsnuami swept many of them off their feet. Sperm rolled down the walls. It poured into the ventilation shafts, the ship's systems doing a fine job of infusing its entire atmosphere with raw Jae-musk. 

Finally, he decided to stop cumming. The huge room was now knee-deep in Jedi seed. 

*** 

The smell was getting stronger. 

Captain Torvast stood at ease, watching hyperspace writhe around her ship. Nothing was exploding. No Sith were shooting lightning at the vending machines. For the moment, things were boring. Which was a good thing when you worked for magical lunatics who would stop at nothing to get a candy bar. 

The bridge crew chatted quietly, monitoring their stations, keeping noise to a minimum. She didn't even notice the smell at first. Just a sort of warmth growing deep in her stomach. A slight flush of the cheeks. 

The captain wiggled her nose as the heat built deep in her belly. 

"Captain, you should see this," said one of her crew. 

She walked over, polished boots clanking against polished durasteel. "Yes, Ensign?" 

"This starboard compartment," said the ensign, pointing at her display. "I don't know if our systems are going mad, but it seems we've gained several ... hundred ... tons of biological liquid?" 

"That doesn't make sense," agreed Captain Torvast. "Send more people to investigate. And ... check on the integrity of the ventilation system. I smell something funny," she said. 

"Oh, I do too, it smells good," said the ensign. 

"Yes, but I want to make sure nothing is wrong," said Torvast. "Get a tech in there if you have to." 

"Aye-aye, captain." 

*** 

The compartment was rapidly filling. 

"Haaawaaugh!" screamed another woman as she was blasted from the end of Jae's cock. Dozens of them packed the room. It was wall-to-wall bellies, swollen up like each woman had swallowed a couple of banthas. They jiggled, sprayed, and leaked. The jizz was meters deep, lapping at the steps up towards the side halls. Their massive bellies kept the women from having to swim. 

Almost no wall or ceiling was visible. Dark metal turned white as waves of spunk half a meter thick rolled down them, falling in globs onto the women below. Stalactites of semen stretched down before blobs of seed snapped off. The melon-sized balloons splattered on the bodies below as the chamber filled with groaning. 

Fuck-musk filled the room instead of air, a scent that made itself felt in the loins of any who entered. Waves of semen rolled along, splashing against the epically swollen bellies of the sea's occupants. Arcs of spunk fountained high into the air, the women's spraying, stretched-out cunts drenching each other with the Jedi's genetics. 

Those genetics were now flooding the ventilation system. 

*** 

Life Support Technician Veela grunted a she replaced the panel on the ventilation sensor. The shaft was getting warmer and warmer. And she found it harder and harder to walk without rubbing her knees together. 

Grrrnnngh. Metal groaned. The woman looked back, forth, and shrugged. Metal groaned all the time. 

GLLRRSSSCHH. A sound like liquid? The hell is that noise? 

Veela turned the corner and stopped, her eyes wide as saucers. A white wall was careening towards her, the walls shaking as it came. The heat rose quickly. She turned and began to run from the gushing wall. "Shit!" 

But she was too slow. The thick liquid engulfed her, blasting her along the tube like a water slide. It entered her mouth, soaked through her uniform, sorted her tools. And then she realized that it was sperm. The ventilation system was full of sperm. 

*** 

The women in one of the infantry berths were changing clothes as they got ready for their shift. A redhead laid on the top bunk of one of the beds, lazily browsing the holonet on her datapad. 

"Essah, get your ass up! You need to get some breakfast!" yelled Risett. 

"Yes, once I finish this article," she said. 

GrrrlllLLLSCCH. A weird noise came from the ventilation shaft above her bunk. Something hot splashed against her cheek. She swept it up with a fingertip and rubbed it, then smelled it. "Sperm?" 

"Not right now," answered Risett, making her bed. 

GLOOOORSCH! White erupted from the bench, a wave that drenched her, blinded her, and knocked her off the top bunk and onto the floor. 

She flailed and slipped trying to get up, clawing at the liquid as the women yelled in surprise. 

After intolerable moments it was over, and she could taste the thick gunk. Essah wiped it from her eyes. The berth was now knee-deep in jizz. 

Risette was kneeling, slurping spunk from her cupped hands. "Looks like breakfast got us!" she said happily. 

*** 

Captain Torvast sat in her seat, rubbing her knees together and breathing heavily. She chewed her lower lip nervously, and looked around, hoping no one would notice. 

But everyone was noticing the problem, because they all had the same one. The entire bridge was breathing that raw eau-de-orgy and it was every bit as inviting as the scent of the Acolyte and Apprentice Friendship Bake Sale on Korriban, if not moreso. 

She squirmed, feeling her fluids squishing under her, noting the darkening of her uniform. 

"E-Ensign. How's that compartment?" she asked. 

"It's still full. Wow. Do you smell that?" 

"Yes, Ensign, disregard." 

"Yeah, the ... what? I'm getting some weird readings from the ventilation system. It says there's lifeforms inside of it? I'm also getting reports of a Jedi on board the ship." 

Torvast squinted, "How exactly—" 

Chrrrmbbllll. GRRRNNNGH. SPLOOSCH! Abruptly, a hurricane of musky, goopy, fresh, steaming jizz exploded above Torvast, soaking through her uniform, coating her skin in centimeters of virility. It was in her mouth, soaking her hair. 

Pulses of semen blasted from the other ducts, drenching more of the ladies. Pools rolled across the floor, consoles were saturated. 

Semen kept pouring into the bridge. The something heavy hit her. A shriek. The captain wrestled with the frantic person for a moment in the rolling gunk. Then she saw who it was. "Veela?" she asked. 

"I found out what was wrong with the ventilation system," said Veela. 

"What?" 

"Same stuff you're lying in," said the tech. 

"Aauugh!" growled the Captain. "Where is the nearest Imperial spacedock?" 

The helmswoman spoke up. "Quite close, we can be there—" 

"Take us there!" ordered Torvast. 

"Aye, sir." 

"I'm going to ask those blasted Sith to investigate," grunted Torvast. Even as she scooped some of the hot fluid up and slurped it down. "Mmm. This is awful." 

*** 

Jae floated along the surface, his fleshy monstrosity still pulsing and hard. 

Most Jedi had useful senses, like predicting incoming blaster-bolts or lightsabers. That was fairly normal. Many had more specialized senses. Some could feel their allies and family across space. Some could even sweep entire quadrants with their senses. The miraluka decided that the force was even better than eyeballs so they stopped using them. 

Jae had a special sense, too. He could feel them, intangible vibrations against the skin of his organ. All the warm bodies within the ship to stretch over his cock. 

Beside him, Dessa floated along in one of the laundry bins. The improvised boat bumped up against Kalice's belly. She was using her helmet to bail sperm out of the container. "See, Kalice! I told you!" 

Jae chuckled. "I think it's time I explored the ship, ladies," he said. The Force propelled his manhood, and even his own body, up and into the cavernous hallway. A slick cushion of pre and seed slid under him, as if he were some kind of hutt that was even nastier and messier than usual. He could just about reach the ground with his feet, but he didn't bother using them, instead positioning himself atop his own cock as if it were a speeder. The entire spectacle was, in all honesty, utterly ridiculous. A Jedi riding a 6-meter cock down the hallway of an Imperial dreadnought. 

*** 

"You have no concept what the Sith are capable of!" screamed Lord Zivarr, red eyes smoldering in the shadow of her hood. "Action and promises are different things—let me show you the action of the Dark Side! 

VRRRM-KHRAK! Lightning arced from her fingers into the vending machine in front of her. The Wookiee Cookiees were still stuck. 

She frowned and punched the glass face of the wretched device, and— 

KLUNK. "Ow!" she wiggled her hand. 

BEE-BEEP. BEE-BEEP. Her holo. 

She held up the device and activated it. The Captain appeared. And she was a mess, drenched in some kind of liquid. 

"What happened to you?" asked the pureblood. 

The Captain began to speak. "Lord Zivarr, I am sorry to trouble you, but it seems—" 

"I'm sorry, too! I will tear this ship apart if I am not given—" 

"If this is about the vending machine, try shaking it from the left side. Gently," suggested the Captain. 

"Don't you tell me what to do, human!" 

"It is a suggestion, my lord." 

Zivarr scanned the room. Then she got on the left side of the machine and gently pushed on the side. 

The Wookiee Cookiees came free. 

"...You have served me well. This time, Captain," said the sith. "You may speak." 

"Thank you. My lord, we have a problem near one of the starboard docking ports. It may be nothing, but we are receiving readings of thousands of tons of biological matter in the ventilation ducts and that hold. My tech said she found the ducts flooded with this matter. We also received a few strange reports of a ... Jedi cock-monster? Those were the words I was told, my lord," spoke the glowing hologram. 

Zivarr nodded. "And I expect you want me to deal with this?" 

"I would be grateful if you investigated, my lord." 

Zivarr stroked one of her face-tendrils. "Very well, Captain. I will confer with the other Sith lords on board, gather my apprentices, and see about this Jedi cock-monster." 

*** 

Sarkopheros keeps talking: 

Why did Jae get so much bigger? Simple. "Normal" Jae doesn't have the force to pull girls onto his cock. He needs to be able to at least reach their legs. 

I don't know if there will be a part 2. It depends on the reaction I get for this one, since I don't know if you guys are going to like the macro cock action. I had a lot of second thoughts while writing this, I'll admit, but I got too far into it to stop. It was fun! 

I love it when you guys comment, so please, please tell me what you think—I don't get very much feedback on my stories as it stands. Did you enjoy the giga-cock action? Do you think the previous size of Jae was better? How is my third-person omniscient? I'm working on it. If you want more of this, tell me! If you have criticism, tell me that too! I love hearing from you all. 




Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 01



Thanks for reading.



Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 02



Sarkopheros Says: 

If you read my last foreword, you know I wasn't sure if this story would be well-received. The people spoke, and you wanted more Jedi Jae! Plus, I wanted to write more. This story is funny to write. And sexy, of course. 

Anyway, same tropes/kinks as before, but I ramped things up for this one. There is one sequence which I don't know how it will be received, but it involves all-the-way-through. Not in a gory way, more in a ... "living cocksleeve" way. 

More notes at the end. Enjoy! 

*** 

Whrrrrrrmmm. The turbolift descended toward the fray. 

They could both hear the comm traffic. "Ooooohh! Bloody hell! I can't even— AAAAHHH!" 

"Oh. Oh. Ooh. Oh no!" Then the nasty, liquid sound ... gloooooorch! 

The guardswomen looked at each other. 

"It sounds bad out there," commented Kenta. She was darker, shorter, and less braided than Estin. 

More chatter. "Oh my fuck, it's coming right for me!" 

Estin nodded in assent. "I don't understand how a Jedi even got onto the ship. It doesn't make sense." 

"And I thought Jedi were chaste," said Kenta. 

"Right now, we're the ones being chased," countered Estin, removing her goggles from their compartment. 

Kenta continued. "How can such a Jedi even exist? How can the light side do this?" 

The radio squawked again. "This is Captain Torvast. I know things are looking bad, ladies. I know that that thing is gigantic. But this is a Harrower-class dreadnought! The hammer of the Empire! So what if he's already fucked most of the crew?! He's just one puny Jedi with a puny plan!" 

"Light side?" Estin repeated. She put on her goggles "Right now, I'd be more worried about your backside." 

"Yeeaaaahh!" screamed a woman on the radio. Splooort, sploooort, came the gooey punctuation. 

KCHUNK. The turbolift reached the deck the Jedi was currently assaulting. 

Chik. Chik. The women readied their blasters. The door slid open. They were greeted by— 

GLOOORSCH! A wall of torrid white slammed into them. Hot, goopy liquid swirled around their bodies. Their blasters were torn from their hands by the tsunami, their bodies flailing as they were carried out of the elevator. The goo filled their mouths, saturated their hair, seeped into their armor. The women gurgled and gargled sperm. 

"Hrrkghhhrrrll!" 

"Ghrrurgghll!" 

And the taste! If an orgy could have a flavor, if male potency had a taste, this was surely it! Estin couldn't see anything, even with her goggles. 

Abruptly, she broke the surface. She gasped for air. "Huuuugh!" The trooper wiped her lenses off. The sight that greeted her made her gasp in addition to the gasping she was already doing, making for some manner of bizarre double-gasp. 

The devastation was incredible. She was floating at the surface of what must have been three or four meters of semen flooding the cargo bay. Semen was rolling down the walls, falling from the ceiling in massive globs. She barely registered it as one such glob splattered against her head. 

Her fellow crewmates were also in there. There were dozens ... over a hundred! Who knew. Their groaning bodies littered the cargo hold. Each woman seemed to be laying atop a private island the same color as their— 

Wait. No. Those were their bellies. 

He'd filled them so full that their bellies lifted them above the spunk like ludicrous water beds. 

Estin climbed up onto one of the women's stomachs. It wobbled in waves as she did so. The belly's owner arced her head back as well as she could to look at her. 

"Hi," she said. 

Estin nodded and said, "How are you?" 

The woman grunted and laid her head down on her belly. "Oh, you know, filled with enough sperm to hydrate Tatooine." 

"Flooding Tatooine with sperm would be an improvement," said Estin. 

"I can't disagree." 

Kenta appeared after a moment, gasping and slicking spunk-soaked hair from her face. "Hahh! Hahh!" 

Sklorch. The belly's owner cooed as semen gushed in an arc from her blown-out cunt. She bit her lower lip. "Mmmhh!" 

"Where is the Jedi?" asked Kenta. 

"It looks like...," Estin looked at her. "He already came." 

Kenta growled. "Dammit, Estin!" 

"He's not the only one," grunted the swollen woman. She looked half-catatonic, her eyes glassy, her mouth slack, her toes curled. Her finger traced circles in the sea of semen. 

Kenta swam towards them and climbed up onto the other side of the woman. The woman groaned at the added weight. More jizz gushed out of her gaping entrance. Kenta bit her lower lip as she eyed the hold. The think gunk just had such a strong, hot scent, one that was felt as a heavy heat filling both of them. Her cheeks were flushing, her breathing deepening. "W-we should go find the Jedi." 

The swollen woman tried to look back as best as she could, belly rippling around. "Why are you two sitting on top of my belly?" 

Estin looked at her and asked, "Because we don't have our own yet." She began slipping out of her armor. Once her pale body was exposed, she took off her helmet and scooped up the white pearliness. Lifting the helmet above her head, she began pouring the thick stuff into her mouth. Slimy spunk rolled over her face, drenched her body, and she gulped it down quite enthusiastically. "Gluck-gluck-gluck. Mmmmhh! 

"It's good, isn't it?" asked their jiggling island. 

"Estin, what are you doing?" asked Kenta. 

"First. I need my energy. Second. We are going to have to swim, Kenta, and Imperial armor isn't exactly conducive to that," answered the braided woman, pouring the steaming seed all over her breasts and stomach. The white gunk blanketed her in thick sheets. 

"Why are you covering yourself in cum?" 

Estin rolled her eyes. "To mask my scent from the Jedi! They can smell your fear. You should probably do the same thing," she suggested, before starting to gulp down more semen. Liters of the hot, sloppy seed rolled down her throat, filling her belly and distending it. It grew rapidly as she drank, beginning to fill her lap. Still steaming-hot, yogurty, goopy thickness, filling her throat completely, coating her body in wonderful stickiness. Glistening sheets hung from her arms, thick tendrils of spunk stretched between her lips and the helmet. 

Kenta sighed and began stripping. "Okay, fine, but we have to go. I doubt it will be hard to find the Jedi." 

"But I bet...," Estin looked at Kenta. She smacked her lips. 

"Estin, don't!" 

She leaned in close. "...That he'll be hard when we find him." 

Kenta shoved Estin off the stomach and into the jizz. SPLOOSCH! 

That was when the PA system chimed, announcing an announcement. 

"Attention, all hands. This is Captain Torvast. Everyone please report to Fore Hangar Bay 2 immediately for hot cakes and ice cream. We have a very special birthday to celebrate!" 

Estin's helmet beeped at Kenta, amazingly functional despite the fact that she'd been using it as a sperm-dish. Kenta threw the helmet at Estin as she swam closer. 

She caught it, let out a loud belch, and put it on. Squiilsch! It squeezed her cum-drenched hair and smeared it all over her face. Kenta likewise put her own helmet on. 

The captain spoke. "Crewmember. If you are able, I need you to report to the main cargo bay adjoining Fore Hangar Bay 2 for a final assault on the Jedi. We must be honest. The situation is bad. The Jedi has fucked and inflated most of you. He's taken that giant cock and stretched you out into gibbering, slimy, orgasm-wracked, barely cognizant wretches, filled you with lakes worth of thick, gooey, gooey sperm!" Her breathing was becoming heavier as she spoke. "What was I saying?" A voice spoke to her. "Oh, yes, thank you. It's uncertain how many thousands of tonnes worth of semen have entered the ship, and we are having difficulty ejecting it into space," she explained. 

The Harrower had dropped out of the twisting realm of hyperspace, and was now cruising towards the Samiya system. And, perhaps most oddly, it was trailing white ribbons that sparkled in the light. 

Many airlocks had been opened, strategically-placed compartments closed, bulkheads lowered, ducts rerouted. The few remaining crewmembers were attempting to shut use the air pressure to shunt the Jedi's sexual leavings out of the ship. But it was not working as well as they would have hoped. The ship's gaping orifices were gushing semen from the sides, top, and bottom of the ship, but it wasn't enough. And perhaps even worse, the sperm was painting broad white stripes across the ship's hull. 

Captain Torvast herself was making the announcement from a bridge she was having difficulty seeing out of because of all the thick white goo painting her windows. 

She continued to speak. "Our Sith lords have organized themselves and will manage this final assault. We estimate a few hundred of you are left. Yes, the Jedi has fucked thousands of your sisters! I'm not even sure how he did it, considering he's been here for less than a day. He's dumped tonnes of jizz into each one, literally! He's left thousands of you as a shuddering, orgasmic, dripping-wet mess catatonic with ecstasy! But I know that you can defeat him. So far, he's only encountered a few dozen at a time. You will attack with at least two full companies. And the support of the Force, in the form of our Sith masters. I know you can do this. So if you can get to that cargo bay, do it now. Torvast out." 

"Is the Jedi really going to show up for some cake?" asked Kenta. 

Estin took off her helmet. "Well, Kenta." She fixed her gaze upon her. "He's already taken all the pie." 

Kenta put her foot on Estin's head and shoved her under the jizz. 

*** 

Jae looked up as he listened to the announcement. SMAK. SMAK. SMAK. The trooper's ass bounced off his abs as he pumped his arm, the Force serving the ultimate purpose: facilitating sex. She slipped up and down his six-meter phallus, screaming the whole way. 

Then he heard the announcement. "Oh, hell yeah! Hey, it's been fun, girl, but I wanna go to that birthday party. I want some ice cream. Here, let me give you some cream." 

That titanic cock began erupting. SKLOOOOORSCH. SKLOOOOORSCH! The woman's belly grew and grew, inflating around his cock like a condom. She howled, "AAAAAEEE!" The woman threw her head back, clenched her cunt, curled her toes, and grabbed handfuls of her own skin. 

SPLOOORCH, SPLOOOORCH. His monstrous organ recoiled like a cannon, bathtubs worth of semen exploding intensely inside her, swirling and storming around his cock, putting pressure on her insides as she swelled up and up, her belly lifting her. After a long couple of minutes, her eyelids fluttered. White sprayed out around the Jedi's cock. The woman went limp. 

Jae grunted as he felt the last few gallons of seed rolling from his tip. Then he sent a pulse of Force towards her. SMAK! Her ass and belly rippled as he pushed her away. SCHLOOORK-POP! The woman skidded across the jizz-flooded room, a broad wake of white spraying into the air as she slid towards the far wall. BLORM! She hit the groaning pile of women, dozens upon dozens of troopers piled up, forming a gaping, jizz-gushing pile of meters-wide bellies that reached the ceiling. 

*** 

Kenta and Estin strode down the hallway. Every door and hall seemed to be flanked by a pair of Imperial banners. More Imperial logos were everywhere, every three meters, at least! 

"Hey, why are there so many logos everywhere?" asked Kenta. "And if you make another pun..." 

"I actually wasn't going to," Estin said. She shrugged. Slap-slap-slap. Her bare, sperm-frosted feet slapped the metal flooring. Her breasts jiggled atop her swollen, wobbling, sperm-swollen gut. Kenta could hear dozens of liters of semen sloshing rhythmically with their stride. Slorsch-slosh. Slorsch-slosch. "Branding is pretty important, I guess." 

*** 

The bubbling ceased. Vowrawn jabbed his finger at Marr and opened his mouth to speak, but no words came from the pureblood. Smoke plumed from his nostrils, trailing behind them as they walked down the metallic hallway. 

Darth Marr stopped in his tracks and began to snicker. The snicker turned into a roaring, techno-distorted laugh through his mask. The Darth doubled over as Vowrawn kept blowing smoke out of his nose, passing him the blunt. 

Marr kept laughing until Vowrawn walked into one of the ubiquitous Imperial banners and fell over. KLANG. His thrashing limbs tangled in the cloth. Then Marr sat on the floor and began dying. "Aaahhh! Ahahahah!" He kicked his legs in the air. "By the dark side! Good job, Vowrawn ... Vow ... rawn ... wait." He paused for a long moment. "Have you noticed that your name sounds like 'mow lawn?' " 

Darth Vowrawn sat up, still entangled in the Imperial banner, and stared at Marr, his mouth slowly opening. "O-ho ... you're right! That must be why I have so much grass!" 

Both Darths resumed their giggling. 

Until Vowrawn yelled, "Oh dear, where have we wandered to?!" 

Marr looked around. "Uh. I don't..." He spotted one of the banners. "Oh, look." He pointed at it. 

"Oh," said Vowrawn. He got to his feet and started to walk again, forgetting he was dragging the banner. SKREEE. Its stand scraped against the tiles. Vowrawn put his foot on it and tore the banner away. Schriip! Then he draped it over his head, wrapped it around his torso, and said, "Maaaaarr! Now I look like you!" 

"Emperor's breath, that's amazing!" Darth Marr stared at him for a long time. "Vowrawn. What is that gold thing on your nose for?" 

The pureblood touched the piece of jewelry. "This thing keeps me from. Uh. Snoring," said Vowrawn. "How is it that you're smoking through that blasted mask?" 

"Um. I don't know," said Marr. They began walking again. "Man, but, what if we..." 

"Yeah?" 

"Remember the experimental droids we're to receive this week?" asked Marr. 

"The pizza-droids? What about them?" 

Marr leaned in and whispered conspiratorially. "What if we blamed the project on Baras?" 

Vowrawn slapped Marr's back. "Do-hohoho! Brilliant! His denial will only make him look more guilty!" 

Marr's laughter stopped. "Wait, where are we?!" 

Vowrawn looked around and pointed at one of the Imperial logos. 

"Oh," said Marr. 

They walked a few more yards before ... "Where did we go?" asked Vowrawn. 

Marr pointed at the next banner. 

"Oh." 

Their feet clanked against the metal plating as they kept going. 

*** 

It was the same in every room they'd passed on the way here—women swollen so big their backs touched the ceilings in some of the smaller rooms. Gaping cunts and gushing jizz. A reek like a brothel. Semen covering the walls and dripping from the ceilings. They must have walked half a klick through waist-deep semen. Whenever the air conditioning kicked on, the vents rattled, and GLOOORSCH, a blast of more steaming-hot spunk would gush out and drench one of them. 

Kenta's heavy tits were now bouncing atop a swollen belly of her own. The whole ship was missing tea time thanks to the Jedi, and she'd gotten hungry. Temptation got the better of her. She'd stood under one of the vents, gulping down pint after pint of that delicious batter. It just felt right, sliding down her throat, swelling her belly, clinging to her tongue. White layers rolling down her tits. She didn't stop until she felt her stomach push through the layers of spunk on the wall and touch the metal. 

Both women were caked in semen now, their complexions indistinguishable. 

Finally, they came into the appointed room. In front of them were more or less two companies worth of women standing in neat rows, many already naked. While semen was pouring in from the vents and knee-deep in here, there weren't any massively swollen women. Granted, judging by a lot of those bellies, they had been gulping down all that spunk, too. 

The three Sith Lords traveling on board were already here, standing atop a large metal crate. 

Besides the human troopers, there was a large group of Sith Purebloods dressed in silver robes. The Dark Matrons. They sat atop more metal crates. 

Atop the highest crate were Lord Zivarr, Lord Galik'ta, and Darth Magnaculus. The first was a small pureblood who was eating a cookie. The second was a chubby purple twi'lek with massive tits that her custom robe could just barely contain, albeit with epic cleavage. Darth Magnaculus's biggest feature was her monstrous, round ass, and ludicrous hips. Her robes were cut to show off those hips and thick thighs, and it was obvious she was proud of that huge derriere. Behind her was a gold-plated droid. 

Zivarr spoke up. "Alright, now that you're all here! Wow, these cookies are surprisingly fresh. Anyone want a bite?" She held up the cookie. Lord Galik'ta shook her head and Darth Magnaculus leaned in and said something neither Kenta nor Estin heard, but judging by the gestures, it was something like "hurry the hell up." 

"Here's what's going down. As you may or may not know, there's a Jedi in the next room. We've sealed him in there. Far as we can tell, his balls grow faster the more stimulation he has, and there's no one in there with him, so they should be at a minimal size. Then everyone's gonna wail on his ass!" declared Zivarr. 

"My associate left out a few details," said Galik'ta. "Now then. First, the infantry will move in from both rooms adjoining the sides of the hangar, distracting the Jedi. After you sap his energy, we send in the Dark Matrons," she gestured at the purebloods in their grey robes. "These purebloods have volunteered to participate in a genetic program designed to strengthen our Empire. It is them who you are on this ship to protect." 

"Yeah, that and some dumbass droids," grunted Zivarr. 

"Shoosh, Zivarr." Galik'ta put her hands on her hips and walked back and forth on top of the crate. Her massive tits were each over half a meter in diameter and wobbled with every step. She looked at the Dark Matrons. "Ladies. I know this is not what you were trained for, but you are Sith, you are force users, and you are well-equipped." 

"So is the Jedi," laughed Zivarr. 

Estin laughed. Kenta glared at her. 

Galik'ta swung around. BLOMPH. Her enormous tits sent Zivarr flying. SPLOOSH! The petite pureblood landed in the white muck. 

She sat up, spitting cum out and wiping it out of her eyes. "Well, that was just impolite," she complained. 

Galik'ta continued. "You will do your best to capitalize on the efforts of these brave troops." 

They smelled hornier than brave, though. Zivarr, Kenta, Estin ... most of the women there could feel the heat in their bellies, the warmth between their thighs. Estin and Kenta could both feel trickling trails of nectar rolling down their inner legs and into the semen below. Thinking of going up against that cock, while standing in its fresh, liquid potency... 

Galik'ta continued. "After he is worn out and tired, we will emerge, fresh and powerful, to neutralize him once and for all." 

Darth Magnaculus addressed them last. The droid behind her began beatboxing. She spat some rhymes. "Ladies, surely we can't fail this. Jedi sperm fittin' ta make us all ship-less. Make us proud, fight his cock with. All your strength, and force-rockin' lady-Sith. These lightsabers got your back, yo. Now, bring down that heavy flak. Go." 

*** 

Meanwhile, Jae looked around the hangar. He sat against his balls, in the middle of the vast room. It was strangely lacking any spacecraft. Maybe they'd moved them for the birthday party? But where was the cake? The ice cream? 




Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 02



A clear puddle was rolling out from his tip as his cock kept drooling. Schloof. One of the doors to the side opened, and in came a curvy little chiss in Imperial uniform. 

She blinked her big, red eyes at the sight of the Jedi the PA system had been talking about. His cock looked as thick as she was tall! It was bigger than a hutt! She covered her mouth with both hands. His balls were behind him, each so big they were as high as his head. She could hear sperm sloshing within them! No known species got that big! 

"Sup, girl?" he asked, smiling at her. 

The chiss gaped at his sheer size. "You're just ... you're massive!" She came up to the side of the cock. The heat was palpable radiating from the mighty organ. Veins as thick as her legs pulsed on its surface, rippling with power that fed the monster. Globs of precum as big as her head rolled from its mouth. 

"Heh, yeah, I am. Still growing, too." 

"Really?!" After all, his cock was at least twice as long as a dewback and fatter than one, too—and she'd spent some time on Tatooine, in hives of both scum and villainy. Granted, most of the hives were more full of alcohol and boredom. 

"Yeah." The Jedi smiled at her. "So whose birthday is it? Where is everyone?" 

"I don't know, it's my birthday, though." The chiss frowned. "I thought the Captain was getting ready to surprise me... it was all a prank! I guess she really doesn't even know I'm here." She pouted and looked down at her brightly-polished shoes. 

Jae frowned. "Aww. It's a big ship, you know, I bet she doesn't have time to meet everyone," said the Jedi. 

"Then why make the announcement?" 

"Huh, I guess that's a point. Girl, if I woulda known ahead of time, I would have brought you something. I hate to see a pout on that cute little face." He smiled at her and leaned forward, elbows on his cock, chin on his hands. "Hey, you know, since they kinda screwed you over, maybe I can give you a little something to cheer you up. And help you screw with them in the process." 

"Oh," she said, crimson gaze turning from his face back to his cock. "Uh ... what. What might you have in mind?" 

"Depends what you want, girl. I'm Jae," he offered. 

"Kinli," she replied. "You're much more polite than the other Jedi I met." 

"What were they like?" 

"Oh, you know, the same old cardboard personality." She stood up straight and stiff as a board. "Har-dee-dar there is no emotions cease and desist your unruly activities, get down off the bar, stop setting my robes on fire." 

Jae burst out laughing. "I know a few of those. I know how to have fun, though, trust me." 

The chiss gave him a crooked grin. "Wanna show me?" 

Jae grinned and took her hand. He lifted Kinli up onto his cock. She laid down on the massive organ, leaning on her elbows, kicking her legs and biting her lip as she looked up at him. "Oh, my. Mmmh! I feel like. Have you ever been in the engine room, or near the main reactor of a super-dreadnought while it was underway?" 

"I don't think so." 

"You can feel the vibrations. The heat. You can just feel it ... all this power. Rumbling and shaking around you. That's how it feels being on top of your cock," she panted, leaning down and kissing its slick surface, moaning as she lapped at it. "Mmm! Before we do this." She took out a datapad and began typing on it, teeth exposed in a wicked grin. 

"What are you doing?" 

"I'm opening up some of the bulkheads and vents they locked down. Closing the hangars." KLANK. VRRRUUUMMMMN. The massive metal blast doors behind them began to rumble closed. "So when you reach your ... 'finale' ... all that spunk will be free to flow and fill up the ship!" She cackled. 

"Hah. Such a wicked, vicious woman. I like it! Let's fuck." 

She put away the pad and looked up at him, biting her lip, hungry eyes gazing into his for a long moment. "Okay. Can you, uh..." 

"What?" 

"My butt." 

"Okay," chuckled the Jedi. He raised his hands. Kinli giggled, took off her cap, and put it on Jae. He winked as she floated up into the air, rising up, up, lifted by invisible energy. The fleshy monster she'd just been lying on tilted up into the air until it stood vertically, a great monolith of manhood. She could see into its mouth as gallons of pre burbled forth. 

"FUCK!" Her stomach leapt into her throat! Her hair and arms flew up into the air. She was hurtling down like an asteroid when— 

SCHRRRIIIIPPP. "Aaauuuuugggh fuuuuck!" Her slacks ripped apart in an instant. The cock slammed into her ass and spread it wide in a blink. The organ shoved her organs aside and bulged out her belly. The whole uniform exploded, her blue belly stretched out, she felt heat in her throat— "Hurggghlll!" The massive meter-wide glans erupted from her lips, pushing up above her, jutting into the air and spewing gallons of precum. 

In just a second, the cock had entered her ass, straightened her entire digestive system, stretched out her belly, and shoved its way out of her mouth. She was a blue sleeve around the base of his cock. Most of her body was on top of his cock, but her tits had been forced to the sides, her pussy was now underneath its belly, and she was a general mess, precum rolling down the organ and drenching her face. 

Grey shreds of cloth raining down across the room, only the back of her jacket and tattered sleeves remaining. The sheer volume of stimulation left her temporarily numb, but all at once, the sensation of penetration like no other slammed into her body. A raw tsunami of fuck, lighting up every nerve in her being, setting her brain on fire, making her feel like she'd swallowed a thermal detonator full of pleasure or some equally inept analogies. 

Her eyes rolled back, not that anyone could tell with a chiss. Her legs kicked, her toes curled, her arms flailed and she clawed at handfuls of cock-skin. She screamed, muffled by the cock jammed all the way through her. "MMMHHH!" SKLLRT-SKLLRRRRT-SKLLRRRRRT! Her cunt began to gush jets of hot, clear juice all over Jae's feet and legs as she came. 

The Jedi began wiggling his finger up and down, grinning. His cock moved back to horizontal, lowering itself in front of him, but he kept it hovering a few feet off the floor. The chiss tried to scream again as she began to careen forward, then backward. SCHLUUURK. GLIIIISCH. SCHLUUURK. GLIIIISCH. Liters of precum sprayed out around her as she took the most intense ride of her life, lighting her up more than any of her battles or covert operations ever did. 

Her pussy kept gushing, and her toes stayed clenched, her entire body shuddering in unending orgasm. She was nigh catatonic—the whole room faded to nothing. It was just her and the Jedi's cock. 

Jae let out a groan as his nuts began to rumble and gurgle. GRRMBBBLLL. They started to swell bigger, bloating out to the sides, rising up in height, sperm multiplying infinitely, fluids secreted, semen bloating. 

That was about when the Imperial army decided to roll on in. 

Schloof! Schloof! Doors on both starboard and port slid open. Hundreds of women poured in, blasters at the ready. SMAK! SMAK! The chiss kept pumping up and down his cock, slamming into him. 

Kenta and Estin were at the front, nothing on them except a blaster. They were immediately hit by the hot, thick, fresh fog of sex. It had been saturating the ship, subverting the higher processes of every woman on board, making each more keenly aware of what was between her legs. The women who had been wearing their helmets the entire time were less affected, and it was them who leveled their guns at the Jedi. 

But Kenta and Estin and about half the other ladies had different ideas. 

Estin looked at Kenta and said, "I wonder if he'll chiss and tell." 

Kenta sighed. "Dammit, Estin." 

Estin stared at her. "You know what they say, chiss is a game of strategy." 

"A chess pun?! That's not even related to what's going on!" complained Kenta. "Anyway. Who wants to get a good look at that cock?!" she yelled, before jogging forward. 

By the stars, it was like a black hole, sucking them in! The exposed ladies began to move towards the Jedi's monstrous organ. It was even bigger than they'd been lead to believe! It was pulsing heavily, veins as thick as their legs, a broad head so big she could shove melons into its hole. That monster was so fat that it looked like the Jedi was riding it like a tauntaun rather than the cock being attached to him. His feet could barely touch the ground with the organ's sheer girth—without the force, how would he even move? 

The rest of the women were coming into the vast hangar, and once both companies were inside, the doors closed behind them. 

"Get out of the way!" yelled a still-armored trooper. 

"No, take your helmet off!" yelled Kenta. 

"That's the only way you'll get a head!" added Estin. 

"Dammit, Estin, this is not time for puns!" yelled the trooper. "That one didn't even make sense!" 

"Yes it did!" 

Dozens of women, each with an annoying, needy trickle between their legs, threw themselves against the monstrous organ. Jae let out a long growl and a sly smimle as the Imps began to clamber up on top of his cock, finding the thick veins made good hand and footholds. Their bodies were beginning to perspire in the heat coming off his cock. They slipped and slid, gathering up handfuls of pre. Women were on top of his cock, grinding against it, against the pulsing veins. There were so many bodies that the six-meter organ disappeared with their sheer number. 

Meanwhile, his nuts kept growing and swelling, bigger, bigger, each one several meters high, claiming more and more floor area. The troopers began to climb them, as well, grabbing handfuls of loose, thick, sack-flesh, still more of them near the bottoms, kneading and moaning, licking over their surfaces. 

Everywhere, the ladies were grabbing up crystalline handfuls of ropy slime that stretched and squelched and splatted, and slathered it all over their bodies, the hot fluid marinating them in Jae's sexuality. Their skin grew warmer, hotter. 

"Mmmhh," Estin moaned. "This stuff feels incredible!" For once in her life, she wasn't making awful jokes. 

"Tastes and feels even better than it smells, huh, girl?" asked the Jedi, looking down at her in the mass of slick, shining bodies. 

"For a Jedi, you're pretty cocky," she replied. Nevermind. She's still making awful jokes. 

"Ha, true!" laughed the Jedi. 

There was no denying it—the heavy heat in her stomach, the heat in her cheeks, it was creeping all over her body, wherever his precum touched her. The gargantua of flesh before her had looked tantalizing before the pre, now it was irresistible. 

And like her, most of the ladies were dripping wet, the smell of a dozen-dozen dripping cunts creeping into the air. And that scent only made the Jedi's nuts grow faster. They were each an incredible four meters across now, their sheer mass making them more oval than spherical. 

They crept over the deck as they expanded and churned and rumbled. The heat coming off their surface was enough to raise the temperature of the entire chamber, turning it into a musky, sex-funky sauna. All the women were sweating. The heat had risen so much, so fast that the computer alerted the bridge crew. 

A dark, petite girl with a cute bob stood up on Jae's cock and moaned as she walked along the top of it, coming towards him. Her belly jiggled and wobbled, gallons of his spunk distending it. 

"H-hi! Oh, by the Force! I'm so hot! I'm burning!" she complained, biting her lower lip, her knees shaking as her juices rolled down her thighs. 

The girl stepped on top of poor Kinli, still twitching and catatonic in ecstasy. There was so much moisture that he wasn't sure, but he was certain she was still squirting chiss-juice onto his legs. 

"Oh, I'm s-sorry!" she cried. 

Jae pulled her closer. "Sup, girl? What's your name?" 

"K-Kenta!" 

"I'm Jae. Kenta, I got a plan, and we can help each other," he said. 

"H-how?" she asked. 

"Bend over and shove your ass in my face. A little pussy juice'll speed things up nicely." 

Kenta turned around and pushed her toned little bubble-butt into the Jedi's face, smothering it with her sweaty-slimy cheeks. His nose pushed against her back entrance as his tongue began to slip up between her burning lips, the nerve endings practically melting with relatively little stimulation. 

The Jedi only had to touch the tip of her clit for her to— 

"Haaaagh!" she cried. SKLORSCH! SKLORSCH! Her body quaked as her pussy interrupted, explosively spraying glistening juices all over Jae's face. The juice rolled down his cheeks, coated his lips. He moaned into her pussy as he began to swallow it down. 

Meanwhile, the armored ladies watched this. Their suits protected them from the fuck-scent, but not the sight. The magical sight of a cock so big it took dozens of women with slick bodies rubbing and kneading and licking and loving its surface to stimulate it. The six-meter phallus, so thick it would come up to their waists or higher while lying on the floor, had nearly disappeared behind a wall of frantic flesh. They swarmed over it, desperate for its flesh. There was the sight of balls that were each big enough to contain several banthas, five meters in height a piece and still growing. Besides the moaning that echoed through the compartment, there was the constant rumbling. GRRMBBBLLLL. CHURSCH-SLORSCH-CHURSCH. Loud sloshing and gurgling inside the nuts as they produced spunk. Their peers were on top of those nuts, grinding and kneading as best they could. 

Many of these armored ladies found their armor filling with their own juices. A niggling, annoying little trickle down the legs, a hot creeping sensation on their skin. The comm channels were becoming full of heavy breathing and quiet, wishful mewling. 

Their resistance eroded. Helmets were unsealed. The orgiastic reek slapped them in the faces. They inhaled deeply, gasping, dripping as their armor came away. And slowly, the armored forces disintegrated as naked, needy women dashed towards the Jedi, many of them slipping and falling, sliding face-first through the ankle-deep pool of pre creeping across the metal floor. 

Jae groaned as he continued to eat Kenta's pussy, and Kenta moaned as she kept gushing more and more juice onto his face. SKLRRT. SKLRRT. The Jedi eagerly lapped it up, his body responding to the feminine juices by producing more thick seed. Finally, the woman fell forward and laid atop Kinli's back. 

The Jedi looked back at his ever-expanding nuts. Their growth was accelerating. All these excited women felt incredible. Their collective libido was a vibration in the living Force that he could feel deep in his nutsack where his sperm frothed and sloshed and swam in a hurricane of virility. Bigger, bigger, bigger they grew, each glorious testicle over two stories in height. "What do you say I flood this room, ladies?" He asked. 

There was a collective wailing in response. He closed his eyes and leaned back against his nuts, massaging handfuls of Kinli's ass as he swelled. Moaning filled his ears, hands and lips covered his skin. He could feel them on top of his sack, pushing their feet into its skin. He felt grinding pussies, smelled their heat. 

KLONG. His balls hit the hangar's main door. Their tops pushed up against the ceiling. The women caught on top of the balls were sandwiched with their backs against the metal roof and their skin against his, trapped in a sweaty pocket of flesh, all air replaced with the scent of his hot, full nuts. They wiggled and continued to grind, enjoying their predicament, growing wetter by the second, feeding their libido to his. 

With nowhere else to go, the flesh-mountains began to expand sideways, blocking the lights and pushing him, and the orgy, forward. Women crawled up and laid in the wrinkles of his balls like hammocks. 

It was time. "I'm gonna blow my load!" he roared. 

His improvised harem cried out, and they fell all over each other as many of them surged to be in front of his cock. Dozens of them stayed behind, preferring instead to stimulate the fleshy behemoth, but most had ended up in front of it. 

CHHORRRRMMMMBBBBLLL. His balls issued a seismic rumble that shook the hangar. The lights hanging from the ceiling of both this and the hangar below them began to swing back and forth. 

The semen in the neighboring rooms began to ripple, as did the precum in this one. The Sith looked up as they heard the vibrations. 

His nuts kept growing. The metal of the hangar groaned. 

"Hhmmmmaaaaugh!" The Jedi closed his eyes and arched his back, roaring at the ceiling as he felt his sperm raging inside his testicles. RRRMMMBBBL. SCHLLRRKKRSSCCH. There was a gushing-rushing noise deep within as rivers of semen flowed through the tubes. The belly of the cock bulged outward. 

"Oh yeah!" he cried, leaning forward and planting his hands on his cock. A white tsunami blasted through it, stretching its throat in an incredible way from the inside. 

GLOOOOOOOORCH! It bucked like a cannon, throwing several of the women lying on top of it. 

A vast white serpent of jizz blasted from its tip, a rope of semen thicker than they were, ludicrous amounts of cum erupting from its tip. The boiling-hot, gooey tsunami swept dozens of gathered women off their feet, knocking them back in a seminal tempest. His first wad painted a swath of white across the deck meters wide before exploding against the far wall, leaving a massive white splatter. 

GLOOOOOOOOOOORCH! His cock shot again, a mighty load that threatened to drown all those ladies in his seed. They tumbled across the deck, groaning and shuddering as one by one the pressure and heat burst like a damn, and miniature floods sprayed from their swollen slits. But this was swept aside in the torrid deluge that descended upon them. 

In the cargo bay adjoining the hangar, the Sith lords heard the impact on the metal as the liquid beat against it. They saw white jets spraying around the seams of the door. 

GLOOOOOOOOOORCH! The ladies coughed and sputtered mouthfuls of jizz as it washed over them, some climbing up on all fours to try gulping it all down. His spunk splashed off the far wall, painting everything white. The semen began to roll outward, covering the floor of the hangar. The liquid began to rise steadily. 

Jae groaned loudly as he leaned forward, planting his hands on Kinli's shoulders. 

The poor little chiss had no idea where she was. It was hot. She was sweaty. There was screaming. Her pussy was aching and raw. Her insides were heaving all topsy-turvy. She felt dehydrated. All that was in her mind was her euphoric discomfiture and the cock. This massive, mighty cock that, for the moment, ruled her entire universe. 

Jae licked his lips, tasting pussy as his cock kept erupting, his nuts very slowly shrinking. But the collective horniness in the room and the dozens of bodies stimulating his cock caused his nuts to keep making cum, even while they were being emptied. 

His nuts sloshed and rumbled, their surfaces rippling visibly. He groaned low in his throat, feeling all those hands rubbing and caressing his crown. The ladies had climbed back up on his cock, and he could see several of their asses and gushing cunts wiggling at him as they crawled on all fours, licking and kissing the back edge of the glans, biting at its rubbery flesh. 

Jae grinned. He summoned up the Force and used it to move himself once more, rotating him, his cock, and his balls to face the armored phalanx. GLOOOOORCH. His semen rained down on them, painting black armor in centimeters-thick-layers of white, the seed blinding them and flowing into their air intakes. 




Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 02



The women found seed being carried by their suits' ductwork, squirting into their faces, filling their helmets with the hot, tantalizing scent. The smell of his semen flowed into their noses, cloying at the primitive parts of their brains, flipping switches, and generally making a mess. It was electric, flowing down their spines, cheeks burning, legs quivering. The Jedi turned to drench the other phalanx in his spunk. And they, too, began to leak. 

And then, on both sides, the last vestige of resistance broke as they began to peel off their armor. 

Ten, fifteen minutes, no one was sure of the passage of time, but they could see the spunk climbing up past their ankles, past their knees. 

SPLOOORT. SPLOOORT. Sploooort... Sploooort... His wads were coming slower, less voluminously. His nuts had shrunken substantially, but were still a good four meters across each, looming behind him. 

The Jedi looked around the hold, grinning. Naked human women were wading towards him from all angles. 

He raised a hand, and Kenta felt herself rising into the air. Invisible hands suspended her. She didn't know what was going on, the frenzy making her perception a bit foggy. 

But it came rushing in when she went flying through the air. SMAK! She slammed into the tip of the Jedi's cock cunt-first, and in a blink it stretched her out like latex. Her legs spread to the sides, forced apart by the sheer bulk. "Aaaauuugh!" she screamed as she hurtled backward along his organ, feeling every titanically thick vein inside her, feeling their pulsing as her belly stretched out in front of her like a coffee-colored condom. 

Her ass shoved up into Kinli's face—not that the chiss was present at the moment. She just gurgled, blowing bubbles of precum from her nose, because a woman in her position as a literal cocksleeve didn't have much to do. 

Kenta looked up at her belly, stretched out meters in front of her, pulled tight, shrink-wrapped around that organ. She could see the pulsing veins under her own skin, the ridge of the glans, the women rubbing his cock through her flesh ... then she saw nothing as her eyes rolled back and she contorted through an intense orgasm that seemed to assault her mind like a Sith lightning bolt. 

SKKLLLLRRT! Her pussy squeezed Jae's cock tightly and her hot juices sprayed out around its girth, drenching Kinli's face. She shuddered violently as her body began to hurtle forward. SCHLLLLRRRK! Her head stopped just above that of the organ's, and then she was yanked backward again. The Jedi let out a growl as he used the Force to make the trooper into a toy with which to pleasure his colossal cock. 

Her ass kept smacking the chiss in the face. And if her orgasm ever stopped, Kenta didn't notice. Her head bounced against her belly as he fucked her for what felt like a century. The trooper wasn't sure how long she'd been mounted on his cock. She was breathing fuck-steam and hearing nothing but the GLLLRRSSCH of her body rocketing back and forth and the deep RRMBBBLLL of his swelling nuts. 

Jae groaned. The tight pussy felt wonderful, and it was even better with all the ladies swarming over his cock and kneading at its surface through the girl's skin. Thousands of times the surface area of a normal cock, all those extra nerve endings for pleasure. A hundred handjobs all at once, hot breath, kissing lips, licking tongues. Tight, silky walls around him. Then there were the ladies still atop his nuts, rubbing and dancing on top of them as they rose higher and higher, sending out sloshing waves through the chamber. 

The Jedi looked around. He had a lot of bellies to fill. Kenta was nigh comatose, twitching and shaky. No one would notice if he decided to blow his load quickly instead of holding it back as he'd done to fill the hangar waist-deep. 

SCHLOOOORK! Kenta hurtled back towards him, her ass mashing up against Kinli's face. He grabbed her ankles. SPLOOOOOOORCH. At the tip of his cock, her belly bulged out in a secondary tent, distorted by the sheer seminal force. SPLOOOOORCH. SPLOOOOORCH. A column of jizz as thick as Kenta's former waist blasted into her, a boiling-hot river of virility inside her. 

Her belly sagged, growing, swelling to the sides, stretching like a brown water balloon. GLOOOOOORSCH. It felt like he was pumping a whole swimming pool through his cock, raging torrents of thick spunk rushing down its throat before exploding inside her. SPLOOORCH. SPLOOORCH. Jizz swirled in a mad hurricane in her belly, lighting up every single nerve in her body, even the ones not in her womb or cunt. Sperm pushed all her cunt juice out, making her body go haywire. As the Jedi's nuts shrank, some of the women atop them began to topple off. 

Kenta's belly wobbled and began to push the women around her backward. It rippled and wobbled like jelly, swelling bigger by the second, lifting the woman atop it up into the air and tilting her backward as the Jedi's cock angled up to compensate. As the minutes past she was soon vertical, her belly a good four meters across. Jizz blasted out around his cock, showering the nearby bodies with even more spunk. 

Jae let go of Kenta and raised his hands. Her ass and belly rippled as she began to pull up and off his cock. SCHLOOORK. Her pussy clung to him as she twitched, globs of seed the size of water balloons splattering their audience. 

POP! The Imp lifted away. Her cunt gaped wide enough for someone to crawl into. GLOOOORSCH! A waterfall of white semen drenched the Jedi and his new friends as she floated into the air. He slid her through the waist deep spunk. The Force caused her to careen to the side, throwing up plumes of hot spunk before hitting the wall and rippling. 

His cock, covered in thick blankets of spunk, lowered itself. It was immediately set upon, an eager feeding frenzy as the mouths began cleaning the semen off its glistening, pulsing surface. Jae let out a little growl, his nuts swelling as they replenished the semen he'd just expended. 

Jae began to look around the room to decide who would be next, but then he remembered the birthday girl! He smiled down at Kinli and leaned in over her. "How about I fill your other hole?" 

The chiss gave a rather eloquent response. "Grrhhghhlll." 

Jae raised his hand, and she began to slide towards the front of his cock, groaning and trying to howl as he unwrapped her from his monstrous organ. The motion shook her from her catatonia. Ruby eyes refocused and darted around the room. Her tongue slid over his cock, the veins acted like rubbery ridges, grinding over her insides. Then, she reached the tip, her teeth rubbing over the glans as her mouth was allowed to resume its original shape, her abdomen returning to something recognizably humanoid. 

Her pussy squeezed, small jets still squirting. But she still tasted the sheer, overwhelming flavor of Jae's virility on her tongue, in her throat. She smacked her lips. There was nothing but that delicious flavor of raw sexuality. And she was almost as it went schlr-POP! And came free of her ass. Torrid pre gushed over her blue bubble-butt and down her thick thighs. 

"Wh-what...," she grunted, looking back over her shoulder. Jae and a few of the girls waved. Only now did she realize what was going on. With the wits fucked right out of her, the chiss had only been vaguely aware of what was going on up until this point. There was a good meter of jizz filling the hangar! The girls were wading in it! When had so many appeared?! 

That was also when she realized what the Jedi intended to do with her. 

The monster phallus was so fat that not even this much spunk could submerge it, so instead it was lurking in the white pool like a dragonsnake. It rose up, its drooling tip pointing towards her. She bit her lip. This is going to hurt so good. 

She hurtled backward. Her stomach flopped like she was piloting a fighter craft. The impact with his cock barely registered—a pleasure-bomb hit her like a turbolaser and her eyes were rolling back and she was howling again, her shrill cry echoing in the room. SCHLLLRRRK-SMAK! Her ass smacked into the Jedi's pubes. 

Jae looked like he was wearing a blue condom, her belly vacuum-packed around his cock and detailing every contour. His strong, coarse hands wrapped around her hips as he began to pound her body. His cock was in her womb—a sensation she'd never had before. Then again, how many women had been turned into living masturbatory aids by a Jedi—supposedly the epitome of emotional control? 

The Jedi's cock gushed enough precum to fill a hot tub in a moment, and already her belly was swelling around it. GLOOORSCH. She slid back. SMAK! Her ass hit his abs. All the while she felt the strange sensation of all those naked human women rubbing up against her, moaning and crying out as if they were getting fucked themselves. Their cries filled the chamber, echoed off its metal walls. Schlick-schlurk. Schlick-schlurk. Her body slid back and forth like a dizzying carnival ride. 

Hundreds of proud Imperial troopers were naked around her, many of whom she recognized. Many of whom treated her with trademark Imperial xenophobia. They were all the same now. Granted, she was having quite a difficult time philosophizing around the bulk of that cock, but this is probably what she would have been thinking had she been more cognizant. 

Her legs flailed, kicking several of the other women in the head as she moved, arching her head back, grabbing her own stomach, wailing at the ceiling. "HAWAAAUUGH!" Jae grabbed a handful of her hair, pulling her head back as he pounded her from behind, all six meters of that ludicrous thing buried deep inside, being massaged all the while. 

As he pounded her body, one hand clutching her hair, the other smacking her across her pert rump, his tonnes of cock bounced up and down, slamming against the deck below. WHUMP! WHUMP! WHUMP! SLORSCH! SLORSCH! It sent out waves of semen, roiling white splashing up against the far walls, painting them meters high. 

His nuts were rolling outward, swelling every second. The women atop were once again threatened by the ceiling as the fleshy robs rose. They began to quake and rumble again, shaking the hull once more, rattling the neighboring compartments, sending out waves through the spunk before GLOOOOOOOORCH! 

It was like sitting on a geyser. Kinli's belly exploded in girth. Liquid heat filled her entire being. Her belly swelled rapidly. So quickly, it rolled over several of the women around her. The rest began to back away, but the cum was so thick it made escaping the blue balloon difficult. Kinli's eyes fluttered, her toes clenched, her fingers clawed, her body rattled. SPLOOOORT. SPLOOOORT. Each wad gushed like a geyser for long moments, devastating pulses of seed that sprayed for a good ten seconds each, Jae's cock stretched out by the storming sperm. The Jedi let out a long rumbling growl of pleasure. 

The waves of jizz rolled away from her as she began to get bigger, bigger, angling vertical like Kenta behind her, a jiggling, bloated blue balloon. Kinli's mind once again blacked out except for her, the cock, and its sperm. She stared blankly at a point a thousand light years beyond the ceiling as he filled her. Her belly cast many of the women in shadow, and forced them to back further and further away. 

Minutes passed as she swelled. Bigger, bigger, belly jiggling, eyes blank. His nuts were small enough now that they'd only be big enough for one bantha. 

Finally, his cock bucked more gently. The wads came more slowly—of course, even the "small" bolts of spunk he shot at the end of his orgasm would have been enough protein to feed a platoon for a week. 

Kinli's eyes fluttered. Her tongue lolled out. And it all went black. 

Jae felt her pass out. Her belly jiggled as he pushed on her with the Force. SHCLLLRRRRRRK... The dark-blue lips of the chiss's delicious alien pussy clung to his cock, stretching towards him as she pushed away. Semen gushed out around his organ, spraying, coloring his honey-tanned phallus white. 

As she moved away, the ladies trapped under her popped back up, gasping for air. 

POP! GLOOOOOORSCH! His glans popped free, his cock, bounced, and her gaping cunt began to gush like a broken water main, a bright white arc spraying high into the air, showering those below. 

Kinli went sliding away, spraying up a wake of jizz, bouncing against the wall next to Kenta. Jae grinned. She was even more swollen than Kenta, and conveniently, her cunt was gushing spunk right onto the human. 

He looked back down at the crowd. "Mmmh," he hummed, looking at the eager ladies. His nuts were growing again, his cock was still hard. He raised his hand, levitating another woman... 

*** 

Several hours later, Captain Torvast stood by her ensign. Just about everyone was crusted with jizz, and sadly, the Empire did not design its computers to be inseminated, so many of them were no longer functioning properly. 

"We've gained ... millions of tonnes of ... Jedi ... bio ... matter," said the tech. 

"It's sperm. There's no reason not to call it what it is, Ensign Suki," chuckled Torvast. "It looks like ... is this right? Almost three hundred life signs in fore cargo bay two? Did the attack work?" 

"They're not moving a lot, Captain. Most of the ... semen ... seems to be flowing from there. The temperature in that chamber is over 37 degrees." 

"Like a damn sauna. What do you suppose it's like in there?" asked Torvast. 

"I have no idea, Captain, should we go find out? I can go!" volunteered Suki. 

Torvast laughed. "Calm yourself. We need to fly the ship. As much as I'd like to investigate the sperm-sauna-hangar myself." A few of the women looked up at her. She cleared her throat and added, "To ensure the safety of the ship and crew, of course." 

In the sperm-sauna, Jae relaxed against his vastly swollen balls. All around him, another room had turned into a seminal sea. It was five, maybe six meters in depth, rolling waves of white lapping at the room's walls. It rolled down the bulkheads, dripped from the lamps. The heat was oppressive, the air was sex-steam. 

Women were again lying on islands of their own flesh, swollen bellies so big they touched the bottom. Towards the edges of the room, he'd lifted them to build pyramids of fleshy balloons. Their gaping holes gushed spunk that rolled down in wide swaths, cascading over one belly, onto the next, adding to that woman's gushing. Then the gallons of seed finally fed into the pool around them. It was like the lewdest fountain imaginable. 

Jae floated near the top. His cock pulsed, half-submerged. It was still hard, fat veins pulsing on its surface. Every heartbeat sent out ripples into the spunk. Thick layers of cum frosted it, rolling down its surface. More bellies hemmed him in, his cock sandwiched between two rows of swollen stomachs. 

Behind him, his nuts rose just a meter above the jizz, high enough that he could lie back on them. Of course, these were just the tips of the icebergs ... his balls touched the bottom. They were like golden islands, rippling. The wrinkles of skin had pools of semen collected him them. His legs were submerged up to the knee in jizz. His bathrobe was completely soaked and squished like a wet sponge. Fortunately, it and his lightsabers were still there, and he'd built his lightsabers specifically to withstand his predilections. 

The Jedi grunted. He could feel his sperm swirling, raging, tickling the insides of his balls, demanding escape. He stared at the ceiling. Jae could feel energy, a feeling that manifested itself as a buzzing in his cock. Female Force-users were nearby. A lot of them, a few of which were particularly strong. He smiled. Finally. 

*** 

The Sith lords sat on top of the metal crates in the cargo bay. They'd stacked them up, because so much semen was leaking into the room that it was a good two meters deep. 

Zivarr's robes had dried from falling into the semen, but it was on her skin, and she'd felt the tingling, the collecting heat. Gallik'ta and Magnaculus were also affected, but not very strongly. All of them felt warm between the thighs, and all of them felt as if their judgment was not at its best. 

Hunger for power is one of a Sith's driving motivators in life—and all of them could feel the raw energy radiating from that white fluid. It lapped at the crates, murky, thick, white, and energetic. 

"Can you feel the power coming off of this semen?" asked Gallik'ta, feeling the warmth in her tits as much as her nethers. She and Magnaculus were both ignoring the arousal, however, their minds overpowering their bodies with sheer will.  

"It's like a fizz, bubbling from this jizz," said Magnaculus. Her massive ass almost covered a crate itself. 

"Yeah, you didn't taste it, it's like drinking pure spice ... not that I would know what spice is like," said Zivarr. "Bloody hell, it's just strong, it's filling me, my panties are like Dagobah right now." 

"Thank you for informing us," said the twi'lek. 

"Yeah, let's see you act all high-and-mighty once you fall in the stuff," retorted Zivarr. "You're like 3 cup sizes bigger than before." 

The twi'lek narrowed her eyes and looked down. Yes, her tits were starting to strain their top, muffining out. "Hmmh..." 

"Yeah, 'hmmh,' you're swelling like a loaf of bread." 

Magnaculus frowned at the door. "It's awfully quiet in the hangar. Wonder if he's finished with his banger?" 

"The power coming from that room is ludicrous," said Gallik'ta. "I wonder if this Jedi is some Republic experiment in genetic engineering? After the rumors I've heard from Belsavis, I wouldn't be surprised. How can one person be a ... wellspring, a fountain, for the Force? One has to wonder, were they hoping he would breed a generation of light-siders? Infiltrate, devastate our colonies? A more subversive type of weapon, breeding us out?" 

"Subversion means being sneaky, and that Jedi's way too leaky. But still I wonder. What rock was he under?" Magnaculus looked at the others. "Power source or not, that Jedi's wrecked a lot." Darth Magnaculus looked towards the dozens of Sith purebloods, the so-called Dark Matrons. "Lord Turuse. Get off your caboose." 

The silver-robed Matrons stood up, like the Sith, standing atop stacked crates. "We are all ready, Darth Magnaculus," said Lord Turuse. 

Magnaculus began to gesticulate as she spoke in rhythm. The droid began beatboxing again. "That's what we need if we're going to be freed. The plan you must know, check my dark-side flow. All you Sith ladies are strong with the Force. That's why you got selected, o'course. Get in there and show what nasty lighting that you throw. We're going to catch a Jedi, so I need you all redd-i." She shook her head. "A Republic weapon, science run amok? Don't matter none, Masta' Jizz'll be our luck. You hear me?" 

"So you want to take this opportunity to catch what may or may not be a genetically-engineered Republic weapon," surmised Lord Turuse smiling at Magnaculus. 

The pear-shaped pureblood smiled. "You caught my words, you fly-ass bird. I know you can conquer that Jedi donger. He's got real tired in that sperm-filled mire. Four'a you, hang back with me. Another part'a my plan you will be. Rest'a you, get to those side bays. Put a number on that Jedi's days." 

Turuse bowed her head. "We'll make you proud, my lord. The Jedi is as good as ours." 

*** 

Sarkopheros Keeps Talking: 

Originally, this story was going to be shorter, and I was going to conclude the series with the second part. However, well ... things got out of hand. 




Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 02



I write stories as long as I feel they need to be, so I don't really have a word count in mind. And it just so happened that this story ended up being 10,046 words. 

So, basically, I decided it would be more prudent to let the story conclude in the third installment. It's fucking huge as it is. Of course, whether I conclude in the third chapter assumes that I don't go nuts with that one, too. 

Another note. I've never tried to write rap before, so yeah. Magnaculus may have sounded a bit weird. 

Anyway, as always, comments, compliments, and constructive criticism are more than welcome. I hope it was fun!



Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 03



Sarkopheros says: 

Don't want spoilers? Ignore the foreword. 

While writing this entire trilogy, and especially during this finale, I asked myself for many scenes, "Is this too ridiculous?" 

Then I did it anyway. 

This story is more absurd than the last two, and it's also longer. 11,877 words. I didn't realize how long these stories would get. But as I said, I write a story as long as I think it needs to be, whether that's 50 or 50,000 words. 

This story contains ludicrous virility, group sex, Force-usage, Force lightning, moderate emphasis on breast expansion and lactation, group sex, extreme stomach bulging and cum inflation, absurd ball-expansion, hyper cocks and balls, and a finale I'm not going to say anything about. I'm probably forgetting stuff, but you know roughly what to expect. A few canon characters have minor roles in this story. 

All characters depicted herein are over 18. Just felt that bore mentioning since some people think "padawan" means "young kid." 

I don't think there's anything else you should know. More author's commentary at the end. Enjoy! 

*** 

"It's been about twenty minutes since the Dark Matrons entered the room," said Zivarr. 

The little holographic Torvast nodded. "I see. What's going on in there?" 

"That's actually a really good question," said Zivarr. "There was a lot of noise, and now it's quiet. Are the cameras still broken, Captain?" 

Torvast nodded. "The cameras are thoroughly spermed-up, and the master surveillance console is full of semen. Do you think they've ended the threat?" 

Lord Zivarr shrugged. "There was like, thirty of them? I don't know. Thirty against one's not good odds, though, and they're all, you know, Sith, not some trooper with a blaster. The Jedi's probably scrap by now." 

*** 

The central cargo bay the Lords were gathered in was situated higher than the actual hangar, and there was a large mezzanine in front of the door inside the hangar. There was also a freight lift, currently submerged in the semen. The mezzanine itself was just barely clear of the white lake the Jedi had created. And on that mezzanine was a pile of silver robes. 

"So what does a Dark Matron do, exactly, Lord Turuse?" asked Jae. 

The pureblood chuckled and nestled against his side. While she wasn't the youngest in the group, she was certainly the curviest. She drew a circle through the thick coat of white muck on his chest. Her luscious scarlet skin was likewise coated in thick pearliness, though she'd wiped it from her face. "We were supposed to be some kind of ... almost like livestock. Breeding the next generation of powerful force users and so-on for Darth so-and-so. Honor of the Emperor and all that." 

"Sounds like some Darths just wanted to get laid," said Jae. 

"I thought the same thing," said Turuse. Her voice was low, sultry, intimate. She spoke to him from a few inches away. She put a hand on his monstrous cock. She was sitting half on it, half on his thigh. "I've never felt as much power as I feel coming from you and this ... monstrosity. I mean that in only the best way." She smiled up at him. "There's something odd about you." 

"Yeah?" 

"Something about you seems a bit familiar, but, you're definitely a Jedi. Ooh!" She yelped as his hand found its way to her ass. "Now, now, you can't have me until you do what I asked." 

"Oh, fine," chuckled the Jedi. "You think your other Sith friends are gonna bust in here?" 

"Eventually," she said, shrugging. She waggled a finger. 

On the mezzanine were the rest of the purebloods. Jae was no longer up against the hangar doors, but almost at the back of the hangar, glans nearly touching the platform. One of the Sith hopped down onto it. She was young, athletic. Probably still an apprentice, 20 years old or so. 

She smiled at Jae as she began to strut down the length of his cock, proudly rocking her hips. The thin shirt and panties she'd had on under her robe were soaked through with semen. It was all over her. The alien's black hair bounced, her smoldering orange eyes looked into his. Her feet stepped stickily on his monstrous organ's slick surface. 

Reaching him, she twirled around, bent over, and shoved her ass into his face. "Pleased to meet you, Jedi scum." 

Jae leaned in and gave that toned red rump a kiss before gently nipping at it. She yelped and jumped away. He winked. "Nice to meet you too, Imperial dog," he laughed. 

She looked over her shoulder and flicked her hand, Force-flinging some of his own hot spunk in his face. Then she stuck out her tongue and walked back towards the mezzanine. 

As she left, another of the purebloods approached, dressed in an identical thin shirt and panties, strutting her stuff. Squilsch-squilsch-squilsch went her feet. This one had short hair. She bent down, grabbing handfuls of Jae's hair as she jiggled her tits in his face, the mammaries slathered with his jizz. "I look forward to serving you, my lord." 

" ' My lord'?" repeated the Jedi. 

She winked and turned around. 

"You have to understand, Jedi filth, we're used to different honorifics around here," chuckled Turuse. She had a round face, full, pouty lips, big, red eyes. She smiled at him. "Even Sith who do not hold the rank of Lord might still be referred to as such. And I think the ladies are much more enthralled of you than the men they would have been given to." 

Jae chuckled. "I can't decide which one I want first." 

"Well they all want you," said Turuse. "And we never know when my masters will burst into the room." 

Another pureblood approached. Splat-splat-splat. "Lord Jedi, you'll protect and serve us, won't you?" she cooed. 

"That's what a Jedi does," answered Jae, grinning up at the lady as she showed off her rear. He rubbed his hands over her hips and kissed the cheek. "We live to serve the people, girl, fulfill them the best we can." He winked at her. She strutted away as another one began to walk over his cock. It felt surprisingly good, having his dick used as a catwalk, and his nuts hadn't stopped growing yet. He turned to Turuse. "I gotta explain something, 'my lord'." 

"And what's that?" asked Turuse. 

"My cock, my balls, they respond differently to Force-users than normal people," he said, looking over at her, his rough hand rubbing up her soft tummy to grip one of her tits. 

Turuse raised one of her eyebrow-ridges. "And what might that mean, master Jedi?" 

He grinned. "I'd rather show you. It's definitely a good thing you opened those side-bays." 

The Sith shook her head. "It was like a tidal wave when we opened them, ripped a lot of our robes right off. Just. Grrrsschh! We just saw this white wall coming towards us. 'Drowned in sperm.' Now there's an embarrassing epitaph," she chuckled. "Anyway. Then we saw our troops go rolling by," she chuckled. "Just gushing your sperm. You do realize we were the only ones who were supposed to get pregnant, right?" 

Jae chuckled. "Sorry, girl, stuff just happens." 

Turuse chuckled. She patted his cock. "I can see that. I bet you're Shan's favorite, aren't you? She seems like the type to harbor filthy little secrets." 

The Jedi shrugged, grinning as another red ass was paraded in front of him. "Master Shan is incredible. I don't really know if she has 'filthy secrets.' But she's nice, she likes me, I guess. She always sends me to cool missions far away." 

She narrowed her eyes. "Don't see Tython much?" 

Jae nodded. "Well, nothing really happens there, so they don't call me there very often." 

"Sounds like they don't like having you around," said Turuse. 

"I don't think that's it. You're cool, don't do the whole 'let the hate flow through you' Sith thing, girl," Jae chuckled. "I just don't have much occasion to be there is all. I don't think they're trying to keep me away." 

"Mmmh. Well, perhaps not hate, but we do have to get flowing, you're right," she said, smiling. "Now pay attention to the girls." 

Dozens of purebloods shook their stuff for him, parading up and down his cock, the footsteps stimulating his nuts into slow, but sustained growth. As they swelled, they pushed more of the swollen, meters-wide lady-troopers into the neighboring rooms. They gurgled and gushed. 

After all the girls were done, they lined up in front of him. All that Force energy, radiating from them. Feminine power, resonating in his cock, causing subtle vibrations in it, shifts in his sperm. 

Turuse leaned in close to him and kissed his cheek. "Still can't pick?" 

"They're all gorgeous," said Jae. He turned his finger in a circle. The ladies all turned around, dozens of round, delicious-looking red asses perked up at him, pussies trickling hot juices down their inner legs. 

The Sith lord scooted over so she was sitting on top of his cock's base, shoulders against his chest. "Fine. Raphana, would you care to go first?" 

A chubby pureblood stepped forward. She had a soft-looking tummy and heavy tits. "Why yes, I would care," she chuckled. 

Jae grinned as his cock began to rise out of the jizz. Schliiiisch. White sheets of goo rolled off of it as it rose. Thick ropes of spunk stretched from it before snapping and falling back into the mass below. Liters of precum poured out of its tip, splattering into the thick semen below. Jae glanced behind him. Good, none of the bloated girls was between him and the blast doors. Nothing but deep, deep jizz. He was going to need space for what was coming. 

Raphana turned around and put a hand on the tip of his cock. That glans was just so enormous! A big, rubbery dome of flesh. It was like petting a thranta or something. It was slick to the touch, the slimy pre squishing between her fingers. The heat coming off the organ was incredible! And that heat made itself felt in her belly. She moaned and backed up, rubbing her needy alien sex against the tip of the cock. Squirsch. The hot precum poured over her over-sensitized entrance, drawing a moan from her throat as it touched her. "Mmmhh! Ooh, this feels great," she cooed. 

This was a bit different from any other cock she'd ridden which was bigger than she was—for one, this one was real. There was a strange humming, a sort of vibration when her slit touched the cock's tip. Like a charge of static electricity on a cold day. 

It was like when you get on your speeder and you start it up and it shocks your ass cheek and makes you jump off and roll downhill through the grass while some jackass mercenary flies by laughing. It was like that, except very, very pleasant. She moaned throatily and bit her lower lip, tasting her black lipstick. 

Raphana ground her slit up against that cock, feeling the fleshy meatus engulfing her swollen, needy mound. The buzzing, she realized, was the sheer virile power radiating through the thing, making waves in the Force. Fresh, boiling-hot precum flowed over her needy mound, rolled down her legs. Which moisture came from her and which was the Jedi's? It wasn't clear. 

Looking over her shoulder, she saw Lord Turuse sitting in the Jedi's lap, smiling at her, looking awfully small on the other side of this monstrous thing. His balls were growing bigger behind him, rising up and up, each one towering meters above the spunk. Even at this distance, she could hear the rumbling inside them. 

Some of the purebloods sat with their feet dangling into the spunk, others sat up on the railing of the platform. One of them was grinding against it, dripping wet. "Hurry up!" she whined. 

"Oh, fine," said Raphana. She looked at the metal wall ahead of her and lifted her hands. "Hmph!" A pulse of energy blasted her backwards. SCHLRK! The giant glans stretched her out in a second. Her legs were forced to spread almost horizontal. It blasted past her cervix, swelled her womb, stretched her insides like rubber. 

"Aw, fuck, yeah!" grunted Jae. 

The pain and pleasure hit her at once and she screamed. "AAAAHHHHHEEEE! AAAUUGH!" She tried to wrap her arms around her own belly, stretched out in front of her like a great condom. Raphana's mouth hung open, her eyes wide, her cunt spazzing and seizing around the ludicrous amount of cock inside her. SKLLRRSSCH. She sprayed pureblood juice all over it. 

Turuse grinned and waggled a finger. SCHLLRRRSCH. Raphana went careening backwards until her ass slammed into the older Sith's groin. 

"Aaaurgh-ghurrgh-hnnrgghlll...," stuttered Raphana, gibbering through her ludicrous orgasm. She could feel all that power and energy inside her, resonating with her own. Pleasure flowed through her the way the Force did, and Jae could feel it too. The Sith's energy fed his own, the resonance making itself felt throughout his cock, deep in his nuts. 

Jae grunted and looked at Turuse. "Ohmmm! This is what happens when I fuck a Force-user!" 

"What—" The Sith looked behind her. Everything began to shake like a groundquake. GRRMMBBBLLL. His balls were rippling, their surfaces undulating. They began to expand outwards, rapidly swelling, the heat coming off of them increasing. 

Turuse sensed it. The purebloods on the mezzanine fingering their dripping snatches sensed it. The Sith lords waiting in the next cargo bay sensed it. Raw, virile Force-potence vibrated against them, resonating, catalyzed by the power of the Sith he was fucking. 

Like two magnets attracting each other but held far enough apart to remain in a constant, vibrating, high-energy state, their messy union causing waves of palpable power. These waves of sexual power slapped the Sith around Jae—it was like standing in the surf, with the waves of the sea hitting them. It tingled against their skin, their nerves. 

If the purebloods weren't already red, they might have been physically blushing, their skin feeling hot. Their fingers moved faster and faster. Several of them doubled over as they began squirting all over themselves. Sklllrt! Sklllrt! Sith-juice rained down upon the seminal sea. A couple of the Sith sitting up on the railing toppled off into the jizz. Sploosch! 

Hot slickness engulfed them, seeped into every crack, and they began cumming into the cum, heads bobbing above the surface, shoulders wiggling and sending out ripples as they finger-fucked themselves. 

Jae grinned, but then growled and grunted through his teeth, making for a very strange-looking expression. He could feel it, too, but he was managing to maintain control at the moment. He wrapped his arms around Turuse's waist, grabbing Raphana's hips. 

Poor Raphana was feeling it the worst. The raw power felt like she set her cunt down atop a broken electrical conduit. She kept twitching, gushing, squirting, her face twitching, her eyes unfocused, crossing and rolling back, uncrossing as she kept spraying Lord Turuse with her orgasms. 

Jae began to pump his hips, groaning as his rough hands dug into the flesh of Raphana's ass. It slapped against Turuse's body as he pounded her, his red-condomed cock bouncing up and down, sending out rolling waves into the white gunk. The purebloods floating in it were engulfed, some going completely under, gulping down jizz as they moaned, gasping for musky, steamy air as they came up. 

Some of the red Sith stumbled forward, onto Jae's cock. They couldn't wrap their arms around it, but they desperately rode it like a bucking beast, grinding cunts into the fat, pulsing veins outlined in Raphana's skin. Those veins were enormous and served as nice ridges, practically vibrating with energy. They had to grab handfuls of skin to keep from being thrown off the cock, because without solid ground under it, it was bouncing wildly. 

Up on the platform, one Sith was down on all fours ... or threes, perhaps, because she was on her knees and face. Her cheek pressed against the metal as she reached back to finger herself, drooling as she watched the spectacle. Another of the Dark Matrons got down behind her and slipped her tongue into her sister's entrance, desperately lapping at the juices inside. They moaned, cooed, and gasped as a wave of jizz swept over them, cascading white sheets concealing red, dripping down over their bodies, covering them in decadent stickiness. 

Nearby, another lay on her back, fingering herself as another Sith sat on her face, grinding her dripping mound into her smacking lips and licking tongue, howling at the wall as she, too, was bathed in Jedi seed. 

Inside the cargo bay, Zivarr was biting her lower lip and rubbing her knees together, drumming her fingers on the crate. Gallik'ta's tits were struggling with her robe, spreading the halves farther apart as they swelled. The twi'lek frowned down at them. Magnaculus sighed, closing her eyes, meditating to maintain some control. 

Jae's balls rose higher, higher, far above their heads. Their surfaces rumbled as they rose towards the ceiling, faster than before. They gave off incredible heat, each one at least nine meters in height, though much of their titanic bulk was still submerged. Turuse turned her head and locked lips with her enemy. Jae's slick tongue slipped into her mouth. He tasted himself as they sloppily tongue-wrestled, moaning, each closing their eyes. Turuse grabbed his cheeks, Jae grabbed her ass with one hand, using the other to grab Raphana. 

Raphana, was, of course, largely vacant. The Force was more tangible than ever, a power vibrating from the core of that monster shaft. Every time her ass slapped Turuse, she grunted. "Mph! Muh! Mummmh!" 

Jae moaned into Turuse's mouth. The pureblood leaned her head back on his shoulder and cried out at the ceiling. "I can feel that you're ready!" 

"Fuck!" Jae closed his eyes. Holding back would be a mistake. He knew that his balls would grow far faster than he could empty them with all these lady-Sith around. So he had to unload as much sperm as possible. 

GRRMMMBBBLLLL. His balls vibrated, once again shaking lights in the cargo bays, causing weapon systems to lose calibration. The vibrations caused the sperm-filled consoles on the bridge to register atmospheric turbulence. 

GLLLLOOOOORSSSCH. That rushing tidal sound was back, a rumbling gushing that filled the chamber. 

Raphana bit her lower lip. "Th-there is o-only passion!" 

GLOOOOOOOORCH! Her belly exploded forward, his cock blasting with such force that the wad stretched a pocket of skin out in front of it. That spunk-filled belly-bump slammed one of the purebloods on the railing in the face and knock her off of it. 

SPLOOOOOORCH. A column of jizz half a meter in width blasted into Raphana's belly. It began to grow in a split second. She howled at the top of her lungs, arched her back, and finally, she went limp, collapsing atop the Jedi's massive cock. 

"Aauugh. F-fuck yeah! Mmmph! I love fucking Sith!" cried the Jedi. Implying that there was any attractive female (or in some cases, male) that he wouldn't enjoy fucking. This is a man who literally fucked an entire dreadnought full of women. No one told him to do that. Shan just wanted him to investigate. But no. Jae knows everything. 

GLUUUURCH. GLUUUURCH. GLUUUURCH. His cock bounced like a cannon recoiling, throwing several of the Sith into the jizz. A few of them managed to keep their balance, but that vibrating fuck-field given off by the Jedi and his current cocksleeve was intensifying as he orgasmed. 

The raw, sexual energy wasn't crashing over them in waves, now. It was over their heads, drowning them. The Force could convey emotion, power, potential, all manner of things—now it was conveying raw, unadulterated FUCK. It seized their minds, thundered in their loins. One by one, the lovely red aliens felt their pleasure reach the boiling point. They arched their backs, clutched their lips. SKLLLLRT! SKLLLRT! Hot juices blasted from between their fingers, bright, sparkling arts of Sith-spray flying through the air. 




Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 03



Minutes passed. SKLOOORCH. SKLOOOORCH. Jae roared at the ceiling as he kept blasting her with jizz. His balls kept swelling. Turuse began spraying, cumming violently all over him, held vertical only by his strong embrace. His fingers dug into Raphana's ass. 

BLUUURCH. BLUUURCH. His cock's eruptions sent waves rolling across the surfaces of his giant nuts. Raphana herself was turning into an island, her belly spreading to the sides, though Jae's cock remained visible. 

Thick white spunk blasted out around Jae's girth. Most of it ended up flowing into the jizz-lake around them, but steaming sperm drenched Turuse and Jae. The Sith moaned and opened her mouth to catch some as she came all over the base of his cock. 

In the cargo hold, Zivarr was doubled over, shuddering, mewling as she soaked her robes all over again. 

"Are you alright?" asked Gallik'ta. 

Zivarr looked at the twi'lek. Her tits were so big they jiggled in her lap, and SCHRRRIP! There went her robe! The purple spheres erupted, jiggling, fat nipples dripping milk as the twi'lek panted. Darth Magnaculus was soaking wet, but she held back her orgasm for the time being. She just knew that they were going to have to deal with this personally. The purebloods she'd asked to stay behind were in a pile, moaning as they ground over each other, each one cumming her head off and soaking her silver robes with juice. 

Raphana rose above the sperm, a meter in the air, tilted at a slight angle, sperm rolling down her back, her tongue lolling out as Jae's cock stopped shooting. She groaned, practically melting onto her belly. Jae panted. Turuse collapsed against Raphana's back. 

"I've never felt anything like that," moaned the pureblood. "A disturbance in the Force, getting fucked by it..." 

"Mmmmhh." Jae looked back over his shoulder. His balls were still growing. "Who's next?" 

*** 

Captain Torvast was breathing hard, her fingers jammed down the front of her slacks, moaning as she pumped them in and out of her sticky-slick slit. The other ladies weren't in any better shape. She moaned. It was bizarre. All of a sudden, incredible arousal slapped her in the face like that Jedi's cock would have. 

"C-Captain!" moaned Ensign Suki. 

"Yes!" 

"I don't understand this, the ship is becoming more and more front-heavy!" panted the woman. Torvast looked over. Clear fluid leaked over the edges of the ensign's chair. 

"What does that mean?!" 

Suki managed to look over, working her console one-handed. "It's all that Jedi sperm, I think! And I think he's growing, too! Faster than ever!" 

"How?" 

"It must be because of the Sith!" 

*** 

GLOOORCH. GLOOORCH. Turuse screamed as her belly grew bigger, bigger, bigger. Jae gripped her ass cheeks as he blasted her insides with his seed. On both sides, more than a dozen red blimps with Sith attached were jiggling. The purebloods' gaping cunts erupted like geysers, each moaning as her sisters sprayed her with spunk. 

Turuse moaned, laying on her belly. "Th-thank you...," she mewled. "This is going to get interesting in another nine months." 

"Glad to help," chuckled the Jedi, lying back against his nuts. 

GRRRNNNGH. There was a metallic groaning noise, a tightness pressing on his nuts. He looked back. His balls were so big that they were pressing against the ceiling again. The Jedi knew he had to get the Sith off his cock. "Sorry, but I'm gonna pull out." 

"Maybe I'll be able to walk again one day," chuckled the Sith. 

Jae smiled and shoved forward, using the Force to send Turuse skidding away. SCHLLLRRRK-POP! The pureblood yelled as he pulled his cock out of her. 

All around him, the hangar was piled high with gushing ladies full of jizz. But nearest him were the dozens of red Sith, each one a moaning, sperm-glutted wreck. His nuts pulsed and swelled, but the growth was slowing. Everywhere, sperm spouted into the air, like he was surrounded by a bunch of vulgar fountains. And still his cock pulsed. It could sense the powerful Sith waiting to attack him. 

THUMP. THUMP. THUMP. Jae looked up. He could hear a thumping noise. "What an appropriate onomatopoeia," he commented. 

Schloof! The door leading onto the mezzanine in front of him slid open. Jizz rolled out of the compartment, then a thick fog. Colorful lights struck out into that fog, and the thumping turned out to be part of a beat. Jae started to bob his head. 

Out of the fog came five figures. Two Dark Matrons on each side of a Sith lord. Well, she had to be a Sith lord, what with the slinky black-and-blue dress and hood. She was the curviest pureblood he'd ever seen! "Hot damn, girl," he growled. Not that she could hear him over the beat. And there was the fact that he was at the far end of a cock which would take several paces to traverse the length of. 

She had very big tits, maybe bigger than her head, but those hips! She shook them back and forth, the hips over half as wide as she was tall, incredibly thick thighs, ass cheeks he could never get his arms around! Jae's eyes grew bigger as she strutted out, swaying her rump. The Dark Matrons behind her began to dance in rhythm, serving as impromptu backup-dancers. A gold-plated droid stood behind her. Its chest unfolded into a turntable and it began to scratch. 

The Sith pointed at him as she began to rhyme into her headset. 

"Motherfucker, why you steppin' in my dreadnought? Jedi invasion like the treaty was signed-not. Krayt dragon-sized phallus makes you real slow. So let me tell you who you're up against, yo. I'm ready with some dark-rhythm rhymes, I'm here to bring an end to your times. I'm the magnificent, malevolent, marvelous and succulent. Darth Magnaculus, makin' you irrelevant." She turned around, shaking her ass, jiggling it up and down, bouncing it in front of him. The purebloods continued to dance around her, the droid going nuts. 

"It's fucking beautiful," he muttered to himself, captivated by her gigantic, wobbling red rump. The dress was cut such that she had long strips of cloth hanging down in front of her groin and the center of her ass, emphasizing her exposed hips, legs, and ass. Jae had a hard time resisting a big ass to begin with, but this red Sith booty was incredible. And she was strong. Her force power resonated with his cock, stimulating him to continue making spunk. "Hot damn, girl, come closer!" he yelled at her. 

"Hah! Who woulda pinned it on this chump? Even Jedi gotta shout for this fatass red rump!" She slapped it, twirling around and hanging back from the railing, her dress dipping into his jizz. "It seems that you caught me by surprise. Because I heard that emotion you despised. You over here shouting 'bout my ass. And I thought Jedi boys were all too high-class." 

He cupped his hands to his mouth so he could be heard again. "Get over here, girl, shake that big booty! I'll show you how a Jedi does his duty!!" 

She laughed. "Oh-ho-ho! Is it light-side lyric time? Trying to spit out some basic-ass rhymes?" 

"No, I didn't mean to," said Jae. That rippling rump was damn hypnotic. He couldn't take his eyes off of its luscious curves, he couldn't stop imagining his hands and lips gliding over it. He imagined it grinding on his cock. The ripples traveling over its surface just drew his eyes back in when they tried to escape. 

The beat kept thumping. The droid's head was spinning and colorful laser-lights were shooting from its eyes as it scratched on its turntable. The Darth continuing to twerk back and forth, balancing on the railing as she looked over her shoulder, giving Jae an eyeful of her gorgeous ass. "Jedi-boy's up in here, all a-floodin' my ship. Pompous Jedi-boys? Into many shreds I will rip. Giant cock or not, you still just a rookie. Ragged-ass hair lookin' like a wookiee. Dressing in red-and black, coppin' Sith clothin'. You sayin' brown burlap robes fillin' you with loathin'?" 

"No, I don't really like the brown," agreed Jae. "Come over here." 

"Righteous-ass Jedi, holier than thou. 'Saber everyone around' 'em, actin' all high-brow. There is no emotion, emotion is dangerous. How about love, compassion, and happiness?" She smirked at him, smacking her ass again. 

"Did you not see me fuck your whole crew?" asked Jae. "C'mon, girl, why you gotta tease me with that thing?" 

Magnaculus cackled. The droid was far, far too into his routine. She said, "I'm teasin' you, I'm pleasin' you. The deck I am stackin. In just one sec, lady-Sith attackin'." 

"Huh?" 

VWURRM. VWURRM. Jae looked up. Lightsabers glowing! He pulled his out as two Sith attacked him from either side. A busty purple twi'lek with a purple saber and a cute little pureblood with matching orange sabers. WHURM! WHURM! Jae had been so distracted by Magnaculus's ass that he hadn't noticed the two Sith sneaking up on him. 

They were each a few meters away, each standing on a pureblood's belly. Jae was levitating his sabers, dueling them at a distance. When your cock is bigger than a hutt, and your nuts are titanic targets, you learn to protect your entire body—distance-dueling was a necessity for the ludicrous Jedi. The twi'lek's tits were gigantic, so big she, was wielding hers sideways. 

He knew he could only keep this up for a limited time, but there were also tricks they didn't have. Jae pulled his lightsabers inward and swept his arms out to the side. CHWOOM! A powerful tremor thundered. Jizz erupted into the air, a circular wave radiating out from him, meters of spunk drenching everyone present. 

Fzzhh-pop! Sshhhpop! The lightsabers of the Sith deactivated, now immersed in liquid. Good thing they're not nautolans, he mused. 

Zivarr and Gallik'ta looked at each other. Darth Magnaculus frowned. 

"Well, lightsabers gone lame, gotta beat this punk at his own game," she said. 

"Plan B it is," said Gallik'ta. She grunted, looking down. Her tits were each now well over a meter across and growing faster and faster. Being this close to the Jedi, with this much of his musk in the air ... the power, the arousal ... all that heat was collecting in her chest. Her nipples went from dripping to trickling to pouring white milk 

"Fuck!" yelled Zivarr. She began to aggressively disrobe. 

"If you want at this butt, I'mma grind you in a rut," said the Darth. She reached up and began to undo her dress, slipping it off, exposing her deliciously curvy body. 

"Mmmh, now we're getting somewhere. Who says diplomacy is dead?" chuckled Jae. 

"Fool, you ain't my chum, just gimme all your cum. Lightsabers can't beat you, but my cunt will defeat you," she told him. 

Jae narrowed his eyes as he floated in the jizz. "Uh. Yeah, well, it's three against one. Outnumbered and ... um ... outgunned! Yeah. If you think your cunt can block me, then using my dick I will. Uh. Rock? Rock thee! My dick will rock thee." 

Magnaculus stared at him. "I would spend some time working on your rhymes." 

"Yeah, I'm a guitar player, not a lyricist," he said. Except something bright and flailing drew his attention behind her. "Dude, your fucking droid is going crazy." Jae stared at the droid behind her. Holy shit, that thing is way too into this. The droid was spinning on its back while spinning its head, kicking its legs in the air, still scratching records on the folding turntable attached to its body. "Does no one notice what that droid is doing? Is it broken?" It didn't help that the damn thing had gold plating and flashing lights on it. And the pureblood backup dancers kept dancing. Yet no one seemed to notice any of this except Jae. 

Magnaculus looked at the droid, then back at Jae. "Don't try to be distractin' Sith bitches. I'mma leave your bigass cock all up in stitches." 

The two other Sith both widened their stance and raised their arms. Jae felt their energy on his cock as it rose out of the white mire. That was also when Jae noticed the twi'lek's tits were steadily growing. 

The Darth raised her hands, spread her feet, and WHUMP! KRNKKGGH! The metal of the rear wall warped as she blasted herself backwards. Her meaty, dripping, feverishly-hot pussy hit his cock with incredible force. Jae went careening backwards, kicking up plumes of jizz with his nuts. Gallik'ta and Zivarr hopped from belly to belly as the purebloods went rolling by. 

Magnaculus kept going, howling at the top of her lungs as her cunt stretched around the Jedi's cock and she spread her thick thighs. Her tight tunnel molded around his pulsing organ, swallowed every centimeter, every thick vein. SMAK! Her ass hit his chest. It was so big that it went up to his chest. KLONG! Jae's nuts hit the blast doors hard enough to rattle them. The computers on the bridge informed the crew that they were under torpedo attack. 

The Jedi and the Sith were both panting wildly, staring daggers at each other. 

Magnaculus had never had such a powerful cock inside her before, nor such a big one. It resonated with raw energy. She could feel its synergy with her own. 

And her own powerful pussy was practically vibrating around Jae. He let out a long groan of pleasure as he wrapped his arms around her cheeks. He could smell her sweat, her arousal. 

The raw fuck-Force coming off them washed over Zivarr and Gallik'ta. The small pureblood rubbed her knees together as her pussy spasmed and gushed. Gallik'ta's tits swelled as her entrance did. SMAK-SMAK. The fat orbs grew so big they hit the belly she was standing on. 

GLOOORRMBBLLL. His balls began to grow bigger, faster. It felt like the Darth's cunt was massaging him, stroking him, making his cock vibrate with her power. And his cock felt as if it was radiating energy that fed and bolstered her own, lighting every nerve in her pussy on fire. 

"Awwh, fuck!" GLOORCH. GLOOORCH! Jae began to blow his load. 

SKLRRT. SKLRRT. SKLRRT. Magnaculus bit her lip before crying out. "Mmmffuuuuck yeah!" Her cunt sprayed hot juices all over Jae's abs and legs. Her belly began to swell drastically from all that jizz. It flowed through her, liquid potence. Liters of cunt juice sprayed the Jedi, squirting up from between her ass cheeks and around the sides, bathing him, washing layers of spunk off his body. Some of it managed to get into his nose, and it soaked his hair. Torrid Sith nectar blasted with such pressure it sprayed high into the air, sparkling in the lights. 

Her cunt rippled and spasmed. Her womb stretched like latex as she grew bigger and bigger, her belly swelling to the sides. They panted as both of them kept orgasming violently, which of course only caused the other two Sith great discomfiture as they felt it inside them. 

Finally, they both stopped cumming, breathing hard. Magnaculus looked over her shoulder and said, "H-hey. Big-dicked Jedi punk. Are you already sunk?" 

"I'm still hard, aren't I?" chuckled Jae. 

Magnaculus smirked and wrapped her arms around his cock. She began to slam her hips up and down, groaning as she manually slipped herself up and down his organ without his help. 

Jae let out a long groan as the Sith began to fuck his cock, sending out ripples through her swollen belly. His nuts were already so big they reached the ceiling, so now they began pushing the two forward and growing out to the sides. The blast doors groaned. Magnaculus slammed her cunt down into him, slapped him with her ass so hard ripples traveled through his nuts and the metal creaked with every thrust. 

Gallik'ta moaned, "I cannot handle this!" She leapt over onto Jae's cock, standing on its outline. Her fat tits slapped the Darth's belly. Pushing down with her hands, the twi'lek used the Force to wrap her tits around Jae's cock, pushing the spunk in Magnaculus's belly down. She began to pump the tits up and down his organ, dripping wet the entire time, milk pouring by the tub-full into the mess as she howled. The twi'lek ground down on his cock through Magnaculus's belly, practically vacuum-packed as it was and outlining every vein. She was near its head, fucking the front half as if it were a bright red dildo. 

"Motherfucker!" screamed Zivarr. She Force-hopped towards the fray, landed on Jae, and wrapped her thighs around his head. "Yeah, eat my pussy, I'm gonna ride your face like a speeder bike! You're my bitch now!" she yelled at Jae. 

Jae replied with, "Hmmrrphhh!" He was hardly one to say no to a delicious, dripping alien pussy redolent with sweat and arousal. He moaned into her mound and wrapped his muscular arms around her slender thighs, easily lifting her small body as he slipped his tongue into her. 

Magnaculus grunted as she fucked his cock hard, slapping his body with her ass cheeks, so big they actually half-engulfed his torso. Her giant red ass rippled and wobbled madly, just the way his balls did. GRRNNNGGHHLL. The heavy metal doors groaned again. 

Jae moaned into Zivarr's dripping red cunt. Pureblood pussies had odd little ridges in them and their lips weren't straight petals like a human girl's. They made for an interesting texture on the tongue. Zivarr grabbed handfuls of his dark hair and ground her pussy into his face, humping his lips as she bit her own. That humming Force power was resonating, making her cunt and womb buzz with pleasure, so it wasn't long before she began squirting again, clenching her thighs. SKLLRRCH. SKLLRRRCH. Jae tried to suck all that delicious Force-charged nectar down ... which of course only sent another ripple of pleasure deep into his nuts. 

Gallik'ta moaned. Her tits grew faster and faster, until the red-wrapped cock was sucked into the massive purple spheres. Deep in the muck, their fat, thigh-sized nipples were gushing milk as fast as the Jedi gushed precum into Magnaculus. 

Jae groaned as he was assaulted by the three Sith. He could feel tightness around his growing testicles. Metal struts and lamps were pushing into the surface. 

He bounced his hips, grinding, pounding into the pureblood's body as best as he could. SCHLORK-SCHLORK-SCHLORK. Every thrust sprayed gallons of pre and cunt juice all over the place, and sent waves rushing out through the semen. 

The Darth's deliciously powerful pussy sent pulses of energy into his cock, stroking it in a way that physical hands usually couldn't, at least not without horny hoards of cock-worshippers. And that twi'lek was giving him a titfucking to end all titfuckings. She moaned as she used the Force to animate her massive, growing tits. Between her milk and the precum, the liquid was rising in the chamber. 

THUMP. THUMP. Jae looked back. His gigantic balls were now rectangular. They'd grown so big they rose from floor to ceiling, from wall to wall. They filled up half the hangar with their bulk, and the hangar didn't like it. HNRRRNNGH. He could feel the metal bending around them. On the outside of the ship, the blast doors were bowing outwards. 

*** 

In the hangar below it, a few un-fucked Imperials looked up at the ceiling as the lamps swayed back and forth. "What the hell is going on up there?" asked the taller one. 

The shorter one shrugged. They both looked to the side as they heard a BLORM-BLORM SKLRRRRSCCH. Two women, vastly inflated with meters-wide bellies, rolled into the room, gushing gallons of jizz into the air. A wave of semen followed them. 

"Looks like our pair of hangars isn't big enough for the Jedi's pair of hangers," said Estin. 

"If I could reach you, I would dropkick you," said Kenta. 

*** 

Back in the jizz-filled hangar, Jae grunted as he felt the twi'lek and the pureblood on his face cumming again. Gallik'ta moaned. 




Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 03



Zivarr leaned forward, grabbing handfuls of the wall of scrotum behind Jae. Cackling, she said, "Let's see how you handle this!" KRRRKHH-ZRRMMMM! Purple lightning arced from her hands, lighting up the room. 

The energy lanced into Jae's balls. Electric buzzed against his sensitive skin. He could feel all that Force power being fed into his nuts. GLOOORSSSCHMMBRRRLLL! They rumbled volcanically. All throughout the ship, pools of spunk rippled. Women's bellies wobbled. Cups vibrated off tables. The bridge crew's consoles told them they were under heavy bombardment. 

*** 

KRRRHNNNOONNNGH! Beneath the Sith and Jae, the ceiling in the second hangar groaned and began to press downward. Rips appeared in it. Jizz began to gush through the cracks, beginning to flood the hangar. Spacecraft toppled and shook across the deck. 

Estin looked at Kenta, pointed up, and said, "Looks like the Jedi's coming out on top." 

"I swear, Estin, I am going to throw you through a window," yelled Kenta, shaking her fists from atop her gigantic belly, the motion causing a few liters of sperm to gush out of her. 

*** 

The blast doors on the orgy-hangar bent outward, roaring in strain, meters-thick durasteel bowing outward. Between the two horizontal doors, golden-tanned flesh began to bulge out like dough. 

Jae let out a moan, his eyes half-lidded as energy crackled across his nutsack, Zivarr laughing wickedly the entire time. "He really likes this!" 

"What you trying to do, you silly little fool?!" demanded Magnaculus. 

"Jizz! Jizz for everyone! You get a sperm, and you get a sperm, and you!" screamed Zivarr. 

"This makes no sense!" yelled Gallik'ta. 

"Yes, it does!" insisted Zivarr. "If we can push this Jedi past his limit, then he'll be too tired to resist capture!" She moaned and kept grinding against Jae's face as he eagerly ate her out. "But if it's all the same to you, I'm going to ride his face a bit longer." 

Jae's face was incredibly slick and sticky. He could barely get air in, the little Sith's pussy acting like a decadent-smelling fountain. She just kept gushing slick alien nectar—a foreign, spiced sweetness, but unmistakably sexual. It tasted wonderful to him. And his nuts were quaking with pleasure as they grew, low humming in his throat as he slurped and licked and swallowed with sordid sound. Schlrrp! "Hmmhh." Gluck-gluck. Schllrrph. Zivarr groaned in her throat as she ran her fingers through his hair. 

"It might work!" moaned Gallik'ta, biting her lower lip as her fat nipples sloshed through the spunk, gushing fluid to replace whatever leaked into the hangar below. 

His hands moved from Zivarr's ass to return to Magnaculus's magnificent rump. His tight abs rolled sinuously as he pounded her, just as she pounded back against him, groaning the whole time. The Darth was treated to the sight of Gallik'ta's bouncing ass as the twi'lek titfucked Jae. Her purple tits were getting big enough to start rising above the jizz, blankets of jizz rolling off of them. 

Of course, every time the twi'lek came, it was— SKLLRSCH! SKLLRSCH! Hot juice sprayed all over Magnaculus's face, soaking her, making her sputter. 

Several of the cum-glutted purebloods nearby looked up. The dripping purebloods dancing for Magnaculus hopped from belly to belly, bouncing off each rippling sphere with a blomp! Blomp! they stopped nearby. MMKRAAKKH! More lightning arced towards Jae's nuts from their fingertips. His balls rippled where they were struck, drinking up the power and turning it into more energetic white goop. 

*** 

The ceiling of the lower hangar groaned. The sperm was already waist deep, thick jizz rising up around the spacecraft, already lapping at some of their bellies, engulfing the landing struts. The lights blinked on and off as the metal warped, sagging downward as more jizz and milk poured in. The Imperials who could move looked at each other. 

"I don't think we should be in here!" yelled Kenta, watching the ceiling as it continued to bend. Jizz was rising up around her. 

"No shit!" yelled one of the other Imps. "Hold on, I have an idea." 

"Better do it quick!" yelled Estin. 

The two ladies ran towards a couple of the forklifts nearby and drove over with them. Kenta and Estin were swollen too large to fit onto the fork itself, but when folded up, the forklifts were able to roll the two women out of the hangar, each one of them gushing jizz in loops as they rolled away, painting swirls on the wall. 

*** 

CHRRRMMMBBBLLRRRGH! Jae's immense nuts expanded bigger, shoving the whole orgy forward, straining the hangar doors. Hundreds of thousands of tons worth of testicle pressed on them, growing endlessly, placing incredible amounts of force over the entire surface area of each one. 

*** 

On the bridge, alarms began going off. 

"What the hell is going on in there?!" yelled Torvast, shaken from her clam-taming by the shuddering of the ship and flashing red appearing on the wireframe display. 

Ensign Suki shook her head and paused, with fingers buried in her slit, to look at her display."Well, we're gaining more and more mass in that hangar. And it's giving off all kinds of heat. Looks like extensive damage to the frame in that section and the blast doors to Fore Hangar Bay 2. The doors are going to give any second." 

*** 

Back in the hangar, Jae was biting his lower lip, strings of cunt-juice connecting his face to Zivarr's mound. She was cackling like a witch, shocking his nuts. 

He could feel the pressure ramping up and up. It felt like someone was squeezing his balls. He could feel the tightness. Jae gritted his teeth. The metal of the hangar groaned as it struggled to contain his testicles. He clenched his eyes shut. "Motherfucker!" 

GHRRRNNNGGHLLL! The hangar's doors tore apart, sundered pieces of durasteel rolling outward as two titanic honey-tanned mounds swelled forth. The metal groaned, the hull shook. The metal surrounding the opening warped. 

A Harrower-class dreadnought's forward hull is split into two "prongs." However, most Harrowers did not feature a giant, growing pair of testicles between these prongs. Jae's balls each were easily over twenty meters in diameter at this point, as big or bigger than many people's houses. His gargantuan nuts were now free to expand, their mass pulling him backward as his balls fought to reassert their spherical shape, albeit on the outside of the hangar. But there was still so much flesh that his sack blocked the opening completely. 

The lightning-happy Sith lords, of course, couldn't see this. They simply heard the hull complaining. So, naturally, they kept shocking him, because how else is one to solve one's problems? 

Magnaculus moaned. "We're gonna keep this Jedi for our toy. He's gonna be our personal slave-boy!" she panted, still milking his cock for everything it was worth. 

"Imagine all the strong Sith he could breed!" groaned Gallik'ta. 

"Yeah, we'll definitely need those udders for that," grunted Zivarr. "They might make you and me Darths for turning him in!" 

Outside, Jae's nuts were so big they were filling the entire fifty-meter gap between the Harrower's prongs. The flesh pressed against windows, cracking many. Windows not painted with jizz found themselves blocked of all light by flesh. Those testicles were so large that each could have contained several fighter craft, so big each one could serve as a planetary water tower. Balls so large they were shaking the dreadnought and forcing it to make maneuvering corrections because of the added mass. And they just kept growing, putting more and more pressure on the forward hull. 

The flesh muffined over the dorsal hull of the dreadnought, now growing up and out of the gap. They jiggled madly as their owner panted. Each nut was easily over thirty meters across at this point. The Sith had to shout to be heard over the rumbling. Magnaculus could feel all the raw energy contained within his nuts being readied. GLORSSSCHMMMRRBBLL. The familiar rushing was back. 

*** 

Torvast looked out through what little un-jizzed glass she could look through. Squinting, she pointed. "Does anyone else see that? What's that yellowish-orangish thing attached to our ship?" 

Suki stood. Her mouth gaped. "I think those ... those are his balls." 

"But ... that can't be right. Each one must be approaching forty meters across! They're like hills! I could go climb them! I will go out there right now in an environmental suit and climb that Jedi's balls!" insisted Torvast. 

Suki stared at the Captain. "I'll help you." 

"Well, maybe later," said the Captain. "But what does this mean for the ship?" 

"The sheer mass of those testicles is necessitating a bunch of corrective burns to maintain current course. Bonus: we're in Samiya's gravity well." 

"I see. I hope the Sith make this better, and don't exacerbate the situation in any way by doing something asinine." 

*** 

Magnaculus slammed her ass into Jae. "Jedi jizz-slave, I'll make you cum your brains out! Biggest load ever, blast me with that sperm-spout!" she yelled at him. 

Zivarr cackled as she listened to the metallic roaring, the hull sounding like it was dying. 

Meanwhile, the twi'lek's tits were so enormous that they rose from floor to ceiling, her nipples over a meter long each, gushing geyser-like torrents of milk as wide as a person against the walls, adding to the mess as Jae fucked her tits. He mumbled into Zivarr's pussy. 

"What was that, Jedi bastard?!" she yelled at him, clutching his head. 

"Mmph. Gonna blow," he said. 

Each of his nuts was stretched to a ludicrous degree, all those millions of liters of sperm raging inside, waiting to be unleashed. 

Magnaculus cackled. 

"Are you sure being on that thing when it goes off is a good idea?" asked Gallik'ta. 

"Sayin' my womb cannot contain? No, I will not abstain," replied the Darth. 

GRRMMMRRRMMBBBBLLL. A tremor from Jae's testicles shook the hangars, the prongs, the whole ship. In the (literal) mess hall, plates fell off tables, silverware danced across tables. In the barracks, carefully-stacked pogs toppled over. Several Imperial banners fell off the walls. Several commemorative plates fell from their holders. 

The ship's computers didn't know if they were landing in the ocean or grinding across the planet in a belly-landing. The triangular engines' bright white-blue light fluctuated. Many windows went dark. Cum-swollen women went rolling through meters of seed. 

Magnaculus bit her lower lip. 

Jae closed his eyes, leaning back against his nuts. Zivarr managed to wedge herself between his muscular, chiseled back and his sack. She wrapped her arms around his waist and said, "Fill the bitch up good!" 

"Fuck you call me? Skinny-ass hussie?" asked Magnaculus. 

"Nothing personal! Heat of the moment!" insisted Zivarr, rubbing her hands up the Jedi's flat abs and broad chest. 

GLLOORRSSCCHHMMMMRBBLL. "Aaauuuggh fuck! This is gonna be apocalyptic!" he roared at the ceiling, eyes clenching shut, hands grabbing and squeezing handfuls of sack-flesh. He could feel it as bath tubs worth of jizz blasted their way through his tubes, stretching them wider, wider, flesh expanding like latex. His cock vibrated, jiggling up and down, its belly swelling enormously, girth increasing inside the pureblood. Was this what getting fucked felt like?! His monster organ's throat bulged like mad. Its mouth spread wide, feeling as if it was doubling in width. 

The sound was incredible, a liquid thundering like the rapids of a river or a waterfall. The unmistakable cacophony of raw, liquid power. GLOOOOOORRRRRSCCH roared his cock! It recoiled, bucking wildly, bouncing the twi'lek up and down, making her tits jiggle as they gushed milk. 

Magnaculus felt an impact in the gut, like she'd fucked a turbolaser and had it go off—but in a good way. Her cunt clamped down on him as an orgasm ripped through her like a groundquake, gallons of juice spraying out around his cock. SKLOOOORRSCH! Jae was drenched, some of her juice flowing into his mouth, matting his hair over his face as she soaked him. 

"Aaauuugh my fuck!" she howled, eyes rolling back, biting her lip hard enough to draw blood, feeling her belly stretch forward with the sheer force of seed blasting into it. 

Zivarr shuddered and went limp. Gallik'ta's eyes rolled back. The purebloods around them made warbling noises, their eyes unfocused. All of them began to explode. SKLLRSCH! SKLLRRT! GLIRRSSCH! Cunts erupted, spunk flew into the air, wombs wobbled. Even the non-force users began to orgasm. The bridge crew practically fell out of their chairs, feeling their uniforms become soaked by the violent orgasm as the sheer power of the union of Jae and Magnaculus. 

SPLOOOOORCH, SPLOOOOORCH, SPLOOOOORCH. Each titanic wad lasted for nearly a minute. A minute of a gushing, torrential, seminal tsunami. Magnaculus felt her womb swell bigger by the second, her belly expanding and lifting Gallik'ta and Jae's cock upward as she grew. Between the twi'lek, her growing belly, and Jae's nuts, the hangar was becoming full of flesh. Metal groaned as the ceiling was pushed down in the lower hangar, some of the taller spacecraft having their wings crushed. 

The red blimp of the Darth's belly grew bigger than anyone present—seven, eight, ten meters across. SPLRRRRCH! SPLRRRRCH! And he just kept erupting, blasting a hurricane of potence into her. She kept cumming right along side him, clutching handfuls of her own skin, scratching lines into her belly, ass wobbling, pussy blasting. 

Jae arched his back, wedging Zivarr deep into the folds of his sack. The little pureblood would have complained if she didn't feel like her sex had turned into a sublight thruster. 

Several long minutes passed. Outside the ship, it didn't look like Jae's balls had shrunk at all, each one still big enough to pulverize a house. And speaking of houses, Magnaculus's belly was so big she may as well have swallowed one. It engulfed her less-inflated compatriots as they were pushed aside. The twi'lek's gigantic tits were each nearly as big, and their milk added to the mess. 

Every second, dozens and dozens of gallons of spunk blasted out of the Darth's cunt around Jae's cock. The spunk-level rose and rose. 

As he kept cumming, Magnaculus found herself scooting forward along his cock, until her face mashed into Gallik'ta's gushing cunt. Perhaps it was some sense of self-preservation, but the Darth Force-shoved herself forward, grunting as she began to slip under the twi'lek. Their bodies slid against each other. 

"T-too much?!" asked the twi'lek. 

"Fuck," was Magnaculus's response. "Of all the ... luck ... so much ... fuck!" 

Zivarr said, "Haammrgghbml." 

"Hamburger, what?!" Jae roared at the ceiling. Granted, he was making just as much sense. "Aw fuck it ... hot damn ... blasting, motherfuck space!" 

Finally, Magnaculus felt her tits rubbing against the glans, and SKLOOOOOORSCH-POP! The next wad blasted her off the tip of the cock. It was now wedged between her belly and the twi'lek's titanic bust. It mass pushed her down into her own stomach. 

GLOOOORSCH. GLOOOORSCH. Jae's cock kept erupting, blasting spunk as he rolled his hips, thrusting up between the hot flesh ensconcing his cock, slipping in and out of swollen tits and belly. His seed blasted forward in a stream of spunk that seemed to flare in width, a meter-wide column of seed that blasted into the cargo hold the Sith had been waiting in. Of course, that chamber was still open to the rest of the ship, as were the side chambers now. 

*** 

Two women waded through the jizz deeper in the ship, holding their bundled clothes above their heads. They heard a roaring noise. GRRRSSSH! GRNNNGH. Metal groaning. They looked at each other, shrugged, and kept wading. 

GROOOORSCH! They looked up. The white liquid rippled. Then a white wall roared around the corner, coming right at them. 

"Fuck!" they turned around and began to run away, but the jizz swept up and caught them. They went careening down the hall, carried by the sperm. 

*** 

In one of the barracks, semen gushed out of the air vent, drenching a woman and flooding the room knee-deep in seconds. 

"Open the door!" yelled one of the soldiers. 

The trooper keyed open the door, and— 

SROOORSCH! A wall of boiling-hot, musky jizz slammed her backward, filling her mouth, nose, and every orifice full of Jedi seed. It tossed the mattresses from the beds, filled the footlockers, and unfolded the socks. 

*** 

Several engineers stood around the massive hole, looking down into a cylindrical void that lead into darkness. The only clue to its depths were the red lights, stretching out ad infinitum. 

"Why does the Empire have so many bottomless pits in its starships and space stations, anyway?" asked a blonde. 

A redhead shrugged. "Yeah, we really should try to set up some kind of safety compliance. This really doesn't seem safe. Where does this even go? I mean, the railings are a good start, but. What is the point of this hole?" 

Schrrrsschh. As they watched, the red lights began to wink out one by one. 

The blonde frowned. "Um..." 

Then, they saw something rippling in the darkness. A solid white mass filled the hole, rushing up towards them. 

"Oh, shit!" yelled one of the other engineers. 

"Get away!" 

Jizz overflowed the put, spilling out in a rolling meter-thick blanket that chased the engineers from the room. 

*** 

All over the ship, the story was the same. Corridors completely filled with semen. Rooms with only tiny air pockets left. Vast spaces flooded with potent, yogurty, fresh, steaming-hot jizz. Women rolling about, swollen incredibly huge with seed. Many tried to flee the roaring walls of spunk rushing throughout the vessel. Most were unsuccessful. 

Jedi sperm filled every hole, crevice and crack. Women who had never gotten anywhere near Jae were filled with his sperm as it soaked their clothing in his sexual heat. 

*** 

In one of the officer's quarters, a woman sat, calmly reading galactic news on her datapad, ignoring the comm chatter and roaring metal noises. Her uniform was immaculately pressed and dry, as was her whole room, and she smelled fresh. Blonde hair was pinned into a lovely bun. 

GLLORRRSCCH. There was a roaring outside her door. She crossed her legs, sipped her tea, and said, "Boy, it sure is nice not being soaked in jizz." 

The woman finished reading and had a very nice sperm-free breakfast. 

*** 

In the bridge, the alarms went off. Jedi seed was gushing into the room, filling it waist deep on the lower tier. 

"Get those doors closed!" yelled Torvast. Two engineers were fighting with the hydraulics, several droids lending their aid. But more semen kept gushing in. 

KLONG. Finally, the doors closed, but sperm kept spraying from between the seams. 

"I don't know how long that will hold, Captain," said an engineer. The doors groaned, emphasizing her point. 

Torvast nodded. "Open all hangar bays! Let's flush this ship out, we can't handle all of this additional mass!" 

*** 

Samiya's glow backlit the ship as the hangar bays began to slide open—both the side bays and the ventral bay. Sperm blasted from these newly opened holes, trailing back in the ship's wake, even as the Jedi's testicles jiggled near the crux of the prongs atop the ship. 

The Samiyan patrol craft flying by, of course, had no idea what to make of this scene. 

One of the pilots reported back to his base, saying, "Uh. Imperial dreadnought appears to be ... uh ... leaking ... white liquid. Biological object of some sort affixed to hull. Bigger than my spacecraft. Not sure what it is. Possibly some kind of soul-powered amphibious space-jellyfish. I wrote a whole paper on them." 




Jae: Worst Jedi Ever Pt. 03



KLANK. A plate flew off. Jizz erupted. KLINK. Another armored panel failed and detached from the starship, tumbling back over the hull. The proud Harrower was gushing semen from every orifice, and several new ones. 

And the Jedi kept cumming. 

*** 

SPLOOOOORSCH. Jae moaned as he kept shooting spunk, bubbles coming from his mouth—the entire chamber was now flooded. Magnaculus wondered when he'd stop cumming, Gallik'ta wondered when her tits would stop swelling, and Zivarr was hungry so she started sucking down spunk. 

So wrapped up in his orgasm was he, the Jedi had no idea how much havoc his vast load and his titanic cock were wreaking. 

*** 

GRRNNNNGH. The Harrower's sleek outer hull was beginning to warp, deform. Durasteel buckled, frames failed, alloys groaned in strain. The starship's armored shell began to bulge outwards, clean lines becoming curved. 

Even with millions of liters of semen blasting from its hangars and new hull breaches into Samiya's atmosphere, the Harrower couldn't drain fast enough. The pressure was too great. The ship began to expand, its hull bloating outward, becoming more round and conical than sleek and elongated. 

The bright engines winked out. The starship could no longer maintain power because it was full of jizz. Its nose dipped towards Samiya. 

The Samiyan people were treated to the sight of the Empire's swollen pride careening through their atmosphere in plain distress. Instead of fire, white liquid blasted from every hole, raining down, leaving a slick of jizz kilometers in length. Entire towns had their roofs and streets blanketed in semen. It was raining sperm. 

KRRRMMMMSSSSCHCHHH. The ground shook as the starship impacted. Mountains quaked, forests rattled, the pieces in a game of holochess fell over. 

It left a swath of destruction across a broad, rolling plain, crops bursting into flame, kilometers of fields plowed to oblivion. And, of course, semen was now flooding those fields, spreading out from the crashed dreadnought. 

Out of the hangar, dozens and dozens of swollen women rolled out, spilling across the plain, the sun lighting their sticky bodies. 

The smoldering ship rose high above them, leaking semen from its gaping, blown-out holes, the hulk's metallic groaning echoing off the nearby mountains. 

And in front of the ship, a red blob bigger than a house sat. A Sith with a ludicrous ass was attached to it, gushing white from her stretched-out cunt, groaning loudly. 

Next to her, a twi'lek whose quivering tits were several stories high and gushing milk laid moaning. And resting against her tits was a Jedi, his flaccid two-meters-plus flopped over one leg, lying in the dirt. His legs were propped up on his meter-wide nuts. He let out a long groan, staring at nothing, eyes glassy. On top of him, a petite Sith cradled a massively swollen belly. 

*** 

The pointlessly enormous doors of the council chamber swung open, and in came a togruta with white markings on her red face. She approached the pointlessly enormous table. 

Grand Master Shan looked up and nodded. "Master Kiwiiks," she said, putting her datapad down. 

"Grand Master. I see that Jae came back from investigating the dreadnought," commented the togruta. "Or is it a 'dreadnaught'? Oh well, I doubt anyone will notice one different vowel. So what did he find?" 

"He came back?" asked Shan. She sighed deeply, pinching the bridge of her nose. "He was supposed to debrief me. I didn't even know he was back on Tython. I sent him a message specifically telling him to clean up and come to me before he did anything else." 

"I see." Kiwiiks smiled warmly as she sat down in one of the bizarre chairs the Jedi Council insisted on sitting in. "I know he frustrates you, Satele, but he has nothing but respect and admiration for you and the other masters." 

"Yes, but he never does what he's supposed to." She stood up. 

"He may be ... less than traditional ... but we're getting reports of a crashed Harrower on Samiya," said Kiwiiks. 

Satele squinted at her. "A crashed ... he crashed a dreadnought? What does that mean?" 

Kiwiiks took out her own datapad and began tapping. The table's central holo-display showed the deformed wreck of an Imperial Harrower-class dreadnought smoking in the middle of one of Samiya's vast grain farms. The ship was barely recognizable. It was so warped and swollen that it looked more like an over-stuffed samosa than an arrowhead. It also appeared that the ship was gushing white waterfalls from its hangar bays. The engines were leaking the fluid. More rolled over its hull from dozens of breaches. And then, of course, were the hundreds of swollen Imperials rolling majestically across the plains near it. 

A reporter held a microphone up to a rodian, who said, "I've never seen anything like it! I tell you what, boy, the Empire'd better pay for all the crops it just destroyed. That funny-smelling white stuff coming out of the ship, though, it's making the plants grow like crazy." 

As the two spoke, a gold-plated droid flopped across the ground behind them, doing the worm, its head spinning. 

Satele looked at Kiwiiks. "Where is he?" 

"Go outside, he'll be easy to find." 

*** 

Master Shan strode across the Gnarls. Several padawans were sparring with training sabers. A nice breeze came off the river, rustling the trees and grass. 

But the breeze didn't negate the smell. It was the unmistakable odor of fresh sex. 

Shan frowned. After walking a bit farther, she noticed what Kiwiiks was talking about. Dotting the landscape were what appeared to be fleshy boulders with padawans lying on top. Except those were their bellies. Shan had seen this before. 

A togruta laid upon her stomach, groaning, eyes staring blankly at the sky as semen gushed out of her gaping entrance. Her belly was so bloated she was a bit higher in the air than Shan's head. A fresh-faced human girl's tongue lolled out, and she waved lazily to Shan as she walked by. 

She passed an area where the trees were coated in thick whiteness, dripping from their branches. A creaky bridge over a small creek let her see that the water was running cloudy white. 

The Grand Master passed several dozen bloated padawans, frowning deepening with each. Then she found another odd sight. A group of hammer-headed flesh raiders surrounded something deep in the trees. Red dripped from their jaws, and they appeared to be tearing into an unseen body with much gusto. Shan reached for her saber. 

One of the flesh raiders looked up at her. It was holding ... a piece of pizza? Shan squinted. 

As she continued walking, a large droid scuttled towards a group of flesh raiders chasing another padawan. Its chest unfolded, SCHLOOMP! A circular object went flying—a pizza?! The droid shot a pizza out of its chest! 

The pizza slapped into the lead raider's face. He stopped, peeled it off, and stared at it. One of the other raiders tore a piece away and took a tentative bite. Then another droid showed up and they began to shoot more pizzas at the flesh raiders. SCHLOOMP-SCHLOOMP-SCHLOOMP. The ravenous aliens were quickly buried in a pile of pizzas. 

"What in the name of the Force...?" asked Shan. 

Finally, she found him. In a clearing, legs crossed as he sat atop his gigantic balls, his ludicrous member hanging down and lying in the grass. It was thickly caked in blankets of semen, padawan-juice, and who knew what else. 

"Hello, Jae," she said. 

He opened his eyes and smiled. "Master Shan!" he slid down off his balls, putting them behind him, and walked up to her, dragging the monstrous nuts and wrapping his arms around her. 

"Oh! Jae! Yes, hello!" she gave an uneasy smile and gently pushed him away. Looking down, she saw his spunk smeared all over her legs and tunic. She flicked it off her fingers and inhaled sharply, collecting her thoughts. "I thought I asked you to clean up and report to me?" 

Jae bowed. "I'm sorry, Master Shan. I was offloading the Imperial droids I captured. We reprogrammed them, and I sent them to fight the flesh raiders. And then some of the padawans asked me for my guidance, and I got distracted." 

Shan frowned. His "guidance?" She said, "So there were experimental droids!" She paused. "Wait, are you referring to the pizza-droids I passed?" She shook her head. "Pizza? Seriously? Korriban is not even known for it!" 

"Yeah, I was confused about that, too, but according to the Sith, some guy named Darth Baras ordered them to be developed," explained Jae. "Do you know who that is?" 

*** 

Vowrawn blew smoke from his nose as he passed the spliff to Marr. "Hey, remember those pizza droids we lost?" 

Marr stared at his hands, ignoring it. "The ones. The ones on that. Oh, wow, where did you get this?" He looked up and nodded. He reached up and pulled one of the donuts off his gigantic pauldron-spikes. "Yes, I remember." 

"Now the Dark CPAs won't question our spending!" cackled Vowrawn. "I pinned all of that budget on Baras!" 

Marr began giggling like mad, doubling over and slapping the table. "Good work, Vowrawn! And when he denies it, he'll only appear more guilty!" 

A tremor shook the table as a voice down the hall yelled with incredible vociferousness. "I cannot find him!" 

"He's coming!" hissed Vowrawn. "That is the loudest man I have ever met." 

"Get down!" whispered Marr. He and Vowrawn slid out of their chairs and got on the floor behind the table. 

A hefty, silver-armored Sith stomped into the room and yelled, "Vowrawn, I know it was you! Marr, get out from behind that table!" 

They stayed behind it so that they could start giggling again. 

"I know you're there, Marr!" 

"No I'm not!" yelled Marr. 

"I can see your spikes sticking up above the table!" countered Baras. "What sort of an imbecile are you mistaking me for?!" 

"I'm not Marr, I'm Vowrawn," said Darth Marr, giving Vowrawn a donut. "I'm testing Marr's armor." 

"Oh, yes, and I'm Darth Marr," called Vowrawn. "I'm in the next room. Would you like a donut?" 

Both of them started cackling. Baras sighed. 

*** 

"Baras? I see, that make sense," said Shan. "And the genetic program?" 

"Turned out it was basically a few dozen purebloods that were going to get knocked up by some dark lords, or that's how it sounded, anyway," Jae said, shrugging. "But they're already pregnant." 

Shan squinted at him. "How would—Jae. Did you impregnate a bunch of Sith?!" 

"Well, better me than them," he said. "Besides, I think they want to defect now." 

"What about the rest of the crew?" 

Jae shrugged. "They're probably pregnant now, too. I said it would be okay if they wanted to defect to us. Is that ... is that okay, Master Shan? They might need our help. And that's a whole lot of new Jedi!" 

"You impregnated over nine-thousand women?" Shan asked. There was a long silence. She pursed her lips, considered his words, and finally nodded. "Yes, we must help those in need, even if we created the need." She poked his chest. "But you're right, we need new recruits, and ... well ... you are a gifted Force-user," she begrudgingly admitted. "But that's assuming they even want to defect." 

Jae nodded. "That's true, but it's worth a try." 

"And you did destroy an entire dreadnought. It looks like you did well, Jae," Shan sighed. Perhaps he was exasperating, but he did accomplish something. Even if it was using complete phallic insanity. 

Jae bowed. "Wow, thanks, Master Shan!" he caught her up in another slick hug. 

Shan grunted and hugged him back, though it resulted in her arms becoming coated in more semen. "Yes, you're welcome, Jae. Are you sure the ... ah ... padawans won't disturb your meditation?" 

"No, I like teaching them, and they like me." He shrugged. "Don't worry." 

Shan nodded, looking up as a cluster of giggling padawans came down the path. 

"If you want, I could teach them at the temple?" he asked. 

Shan looked at him. Not after the last time! "This is better. Field training is more conducive to learning than the environment of the temple," she said. 

Jae nodded. "I agree." 

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I need a shower," said the Grand Master. Jae bowed. She nodded and turned around to head back to the temple. 

*** 

Sarkopheros keeps talking: 

Why yes, I do enjoy rambling and talking about my story and process. Yes, you can skip this if you prefer to focus on the story rather than what I did to create it. Think of this as one of those DVD special features. 

You people don't read my stories for subtlety, do you? I mean, don't get me wrong, I love hearing from you and knowing why my stories draw you in. Humor? Sexiness? Something else? Some combination? But I really doubt you come to me for subtle, tasteful sex. That's largely why I went nuts with this story. Because fuck it, let's try it out. And it seems you guys liked it! 

Some of you wonder why I didn't have Jae fuck the canons. Well, I thought that would get a bit too fanfic-y / Mary-Sueish. 

Granted, Jae is sort of a Sue in this story, but it's all in jest. I'm not 100% sure why, but my gut told me not to have him fuck the canons. That, and I thought it was way funnier if Satele was just there to facepalm the entire time rather than riding Jae's cock. What do you think of what I did with the canons? 

I set a record during this story—5,489 words in one day. That is not normal. It also involved a degree of writer's block and a little planning, which I don't usually do for these stories. 

As always, yes, I am fishing for comments because I'm a comment-slut. Compliments, criticism, canon correction, general commentary, I welcome it all.